#they’re family. but maybe not in the father-son way like you may define his and Cora’s relationship
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Been reading Law Novel 👍
(super legally and not at all from a Google Docs English fan translation 👀)
WOLF ONE PIECE I KNOW YOURE NOT CANON BUT YOU REMAIN FOREVER FAMOUS TO MEEEE!!!
(Handwriting translations under the cut)
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Law: Junk-ya this is Bepo. He’s a polar bear and he’s going to live with us now. Be nice
Bepo: He brought me here without explaining anything..sorry….
2-
I like this sad old man :)
3-
Wolf: I swear, I let ONE kid stay - out of pure convenience - and they just kept multiplying!
Dadan: Tell me about it…
Both of them, thinking: I LOVE MY FUCKIN KIIIIDDDDSSSS!!!!
#tho I do acknowledge that wolf’s role - at least towards Law - is not exactly parental#which is one of the reasons Law likes it so much - since he’s being taken seriously after all the Trauma™️#but regardless it’s full of love and they are ‘his kids’ - as in the kids he houses and who follow him around and feel happy living with him#they’re family. but maybe not in the father-son way like you may define his and Cora’s relationship#but the love and safety that comes from having a kind adult to look out for you and prepare you for life as you go through it#or the joy of having a young person in your house who looks up to you and brings joy/meaning to your life is all still there#it’s kinda the same for Dadan actually - though different cuz of the ages and ways that she got her kids are much different- especially Ace#plus wolf does it voluntarily lmao. not to diss Dadan ofc I love her - but it’s sweet to see how non-reluctant this guy is#Law has always been so loved - even if he kept losing the people who loved him for a while - and it makes me so emotional#anyway i love him#he’s canon in my heart stfu 😭#one piece#one piece fanart#my art#trafalgardwaterlaw#trafalgar law#one piece law#law novel#novel law#one piece novel law#wolf one piece#genius inventor wolf#one piece wolf#one piece bepo#bepo one piece#curly dadan#one piece dadan#heart pirates#me yapping#yapping in tags
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New to the fandom, Could you explain June? 💯 Love and support her. But homestuck 2 doesn't have her and I'm just confused?
June Egbert precedes the concept of homestuck^2! I’ve seen a lot of people be confused about this because they weren’t active on the fandom at the time the epilogues dropped, when reading her as a trans woman got a lot of discussion going and eventually lead to multiple confirmations.
So here’s an attempt at contextualization:
Throughout Homestuck, a few key ideas about Egbert’s identity and motivation to push forward with her hero’s journey are dropped like breadcrumbs. She’s meant to play the default straight-man protagonist. Her defining traits are ridiculously… generic, when compared to how all the other kids present themselves and stick to exaggerated bits. She’s a perfectly normal, regular suburban kid with normal, suburban issues.
She may not leave her room a whole lot. She may not have a lot of real life friends in the neighborhood. She holds a comical irritation for the concept of birthdays, even though her father is extremely supportive, and is delighted to see his son grow up nice and healthy. There’s no reason for her to be so irrationally upset at cakes and gifts, and that’s what makes the setup funny! June doesn’t even know why she’s annoyed with half of the things that annoy her, what the heck.
But under all that playing around there is a sense that her life is so normal, so blasé, so unexciting and limiting and hollow and fake that she’d give anything to not be herself, even if only for ten minutes. This goes way, way back. It’s why June needs SBURB to happen.
June lives as though her life hasn’t started yet. She’s stuck in the Tutorial stage. I would argue while most kids (and trolls) play SBURB to escape a shitty environment or the end of the world as they know it, June plays for a simpler reason: She needs to escape herself, and she needs to do it before it is too late.
Being thirteen means crossing the homeric abyss between being a child with no care for the world sporting a generic hand-me-down identity and becoming a Teen (capital T) who needs to figure out how to cope with atrocious bodily changes while building the adult they’re meant to be AND deciding what the fuck they want out of life, and how they’re going to work to get it, forever and ever.
When you’re trans, and you don’t yet know you’re trans (or that this is a thing you’re even ALLOWED to be) the above feels a lot like serving a life sentence for an intangible crime.
You know what you’re supposed to do. You’ve seen it on tv, you’ve heard it from your dad, you know what are the normal trials and tribulations. You know you'll grow a few pimples and stubble and you'll need to learn how to shave, obviously, because it's basically a tradition in your family, and no one is really happy to be a teen. You know at some point you'll find a nice girl and you'll grow a hat out of your skull and then you will have to pay taxes and maybe you will have a baby daughter? You'd like it to be a daughter for no particular reason. And when you get a daughter you're going to name her Casey and she's going to be adorable and this is something you've dedicated a lot of thought to. Maybe its because you thought Nic Cage looked really cool with those long flowing locks in con air, the movie who featured a trans woman as a minor character for a few minutes (and she gets quite a bit of compliments, regardless of how the movie has aged), and he had a really exciting life, but goddamn did he love his daughter. There is no purer love than the bond between a father and his daughter.
This absolutely has nothing to do with your father and you, or how you hold no excitement for becoming an adult man, or how your father's excitement for you becoming an adult man in your stead feels a little stifling.
But i digress.
June spends her time on SBURB mostly hassling karkat, and readily following the instructions of zany, dangerous, COOL girls that seem to know what they're doing. June lets Terezi lead her to certain death without blinking. June lets Vriska dress her up as soon as opportunity presents itself. June thinks its really funny to trick this troll Who Types Really Oddly into believing she's Rose, and also into believing that she's a very silly girl. You may even say Homestuck employs a few of jokes pertaining to how her name looks like EGG !
June has a ball playing this game until it starts to get shitty. She's never able to mend her relationship with her dad, as he's one of the first causalities. She has to spend a lot of time waiting around with jade on a ship until things get cool and exciting again, but she never stops growing during those three years. Its fine, though, because there's always more things to be done and more people to fight.
Until there aren't, and they make a new earth, and while everyone cheers and claps for the birth of a new planet June realizes all her excuses are over. Her friends begin to grow up. Rose gets married. Jade is living her best life. Dave has a not-boyfriend glued to his hip. Jane has a job. Jake is on TV for some reason. June doesn't want to leave home. June's birthday is around the corner again. Here come all the congratulations for becoming a strong lad for yet another year! Vriska is gone. Terezi is gone. SBURB is over. Wacky hijinks have been swapped for real-ass, boring-ass Regular life. We watch her unsuccessfully chase after the glory of days gone by when Rose presents her the possibility of going back into the game, when things were cool and mattered, or her flimsy decision to settle down with a nice girl she hasn’t really made an effort to know and become a father and be absolutely miserable for four decades as she asserts nothing is real, not anymore, and this is just how it is.
Depersonalization, depression and general apathy towards the world are all pronounced aspects of dysphoria that seem like unrelated incidents for someone who hasn't came out yet. June's trainwreck of a life post-game, specially her feeling of hollowness and chasing after anything that could fill it struck a chord with trans readers who left the epilogues to read HS again and discovered this has always sort of been here. June being a trans woman who doesn't have the proper vocabulary to express she is a trans woman makes a lot of earlier bits from the comic click into place, now in a broader context. We settled in the name "June" because it's what she imagines Vriska is calling her at some point, amid laughs, but even that was discussed for a lengthy period last year. What would she want to be called, what are possible tags for this, etc. But it was mostly for fun and games, because the prospect of the protagonist of a 10 year old beloved cult series being ACTUALLY confirmed as a trans woman just wasn't something that was done.
Until word got around to Andrew Hussie and he was reportedly so pleased with this interpretation of events he’d be making references to it, and some time later, a box of toblerones was left in a cave as a gift for fans to find. The first person to find a toblerone thought it would be funny to dedicate it to June, because now she was an ongoing reference that was fun to make. Instead of it ending there, Hussie logs on twitter for the first time in a long while to say 'Oh yeah, i'll make it happen' and that's when the whole thing exploded. I have a post detailing this made a year ago (with pictures!) so i won't keep you here.
In the year since, June has been vaguely alluded to in Pesterquest (in jade's end card, she's having her nails painted by rose.) Has been widely adopted by the community, those making their own fanventures and continuations, and the team behind Homestuck^2. In every way that matters, she's already thriving within the community that brought her to light a year ago. But her coming out in canon is something that will take time and a proper narrative arc to happen, one that is still being set up. We know it'll come eventually, the only question is “how”.
Not that the wind waits for anyone.
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‘Aunt May Dies’ + ‘Tony Becomes Peter’s Dad’ Masterlist
5 Times Peter Thought Tony Was Mad (ao3) - caraminha T, 23k
Summary: ... and one time he actually was.
(That trope we all know and love!) Set a few months after Aunt May's death where Tony is Peter's legal guardian. Navigating a new life together and settling into being father and son is a rollercoaster - falling in love with the kid? Easy. Dealing with a grieving teenager, and trying to figure out how to do this whole parent thing? Uh... not so easy.
How could I resist when this fandom literally lives and breathes 5+1s?!
A Dysfunctional Senior Year (ao3) - ApolloLoki97 T, 177k
Summary: The chronicles of Peter Parker's eventful Senior Year.
After moving in with the Avengers due to an unfortunate passing of Aunt May, Peter is living with a dysfunctional crew who he can't help but love.
However, someone is threatening the Avengers and the safety of the world and those within it. It's up to Peter and the rest of the team to figure out how to save the world, but most importantly, themselves.
How will this all play out?
All the Devils are Here (ao3) - YellowDistress T, 98k
Summary: Peter knows deep down, in the glass that is his mind, that he couldn't have stopped it. He couldn't have known that on a freezing night, May Parker would step out in front of a moving vehicle and die. All the while, he was laughing with Ned, their voices carrying through the streets of Queens. Peter knows deep down, he couldn't have fathomed the events that would follow. An abyss of never-ending ache and the disorderly behavior that grown men weren't supposed to exhibit, but Tony Stark would manage to display anyway. Peter knows all of these things, but still manages to be eaten alive, every single day.
And You'll Blow Us All Away (ao3) - losingmymindtonight T, 59k
Summary: Peter Parker had had everything: a mother, a father, an uncle, an aunt. He'd lost them all. All he had left was Tony Stark, and all Tony Stark had left was him. And in the wake of their insurmountable losses, they go about trying to find a family within each other.
Gone, but Remembered Always (ao3) - HolyKingWasteLand T, 2k
Summary: While Peter is doing his nightly rounds, a gas pipe explodes in his apartment complex and sets the building on fire. Mostly everyone escapes, some are injured but they’re alive.
Aunt May… Isn’t so lucky.
I Will Carry You (Always) (ao3) - TheStarvingWriter T, 163k
Summary: When Aunt May tragically dies in a car accident, not only is Peter crushed, but he blames himself for it as well. Luckily, there’s someone there to pick up the pieces, and just maybe, put them back together again. Featuring a self-deprecating yet fatherly Tony and a soft, scared Peter.
Lights To Guide You Home (ao3) - JolinarJackson T, 185k
Summary: Tony becomes Peter's guardian after May dies unexpectedly and over the course of a year, they learn to become a family.
Oh Christmas Lights, Keep Shining On (ao3) - ciaconnaa T, 14k
Summary: Tony isn’t one to hash out the differences between a house and a home. Those kinds of cheesy sayings are better left to soccer moms and Hallmark cards. But standing in the middle of Peter’s kitchen with his sleeves all sudsy, surrounded by pictures, evidence, and history of a house well lived in, Tony can easily define that this is not a house, it’s a home. Peter’s home.
There’s no way he can take Peter away from his home for Christmas. Not when he doesn’t have his aunt anymore.
He makes a decision. A split decision, really. All the details explode in his head like a supernova, like they always do, but it’s a plan. And he’s gonna stick to it.
Raise Me Up (ao3) - LBIGreyhound13 T, 124k
Summary: Takes place 10 months after Spider-Man: Homecoming. After Aunt May suddenly dies, Peter has nowhere to go. Luckily, there’s a certain mentor of his, who comes in to save him...in more ways than one.
The darkest hour is just before the dawn (ao3) - StarryKnight09 T, 90k
Summary: “Is this Peter Parker?”
“Yes…”
“This is Dr. Nguyen. I’m sorry but your aunt’s been in an accident and we’re going to need you to come to Queens Memorial as soon as you can.”
Peter's life shatters with a phone call. The last person he expects helps him pick up the pieces.
The Guardian (ao3) - Emily_F6 T, 234k
Summary: Guardian: a person who guards, protects, or preserves.
When a terrible accident claims the life of May Parker, Tony Stark steps up as Peter's guaridan. But it's not just a traumatized super-teen he'll have to worry about when he recieves a transmission from Thor.
three words that became hard to say (i and love and you) (ao3) - madasthesea G, 6k
Summary: Tony likes giving gifts to prove his love, but they don't usually have four paws and a tail.
AKA: Tony, Peter, and a dog named Maggie learn how to be a family.
Trial and Error (ao3) - JolinarJackson T, 9k
Summary: Tony had had a plan. He'd even had several contingency plans. But not for this.
Peter stared at him, his dark eyes flitting to the phone and then back, and Tony could see that he understood, could pinpoint the moment Peter knew … and refused to believe it. His jaw set, his hands clenched into fists and he shook his head. ”No.” Tony breathed and shook his head. ”Peter … your aunt … I'm sorry.”
#themculibrary#mcu#marvel#irondad#peter parker#tony stark#irondad masterlist#masterlists#tw#death tw#character death
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One Piece Mermaid AU!
Featuring Luffy as a rubber mermaid who can’t swim, and Ace who carries her on his back as they pirate together.
*Genderbend warning, fem!Luffy
Sliding in last minute for MerMay, bc idk about you, but I need something to mark that May has passed this year...
~~
PLEASE DO NOT REPOST, EDIT, TRANSLATE, OR OTHERWISE USE MY ART. To share, please reblog! Reblogs and comments greatly appreciated!!!
~~
Base headcanons for this AU beneath the cut! ↓ ↓ ↓
Luffy's a mermaid who was raised in Fuusha village, just like in canon. And, just like in canon, despite being a mermaid, she SUCKS at swimming, a fact that Shanks finds absolutely hilarious. She still wants to become a pirate, she still eats her devil fruit and becomes a rubber mer(?), she still gets kidnapped by Higuma (who sees her as an excellent way to rake in cash, given how valuable mermaids are on the slave market), and Shanks still gives her his hat.
As a devil fruit user, Luffy's already atrocious swimming skills are now at zero. She can still breathe under water, but will sink like a stone, her strength sapped by the sea, and if she loses consciousness she'll stop breathing too. Needless to say, she stays out of the water, and the villagers come to accept that sometimes, mermaids just live on land.
Garp still comes back, and is still furious at her wanting to become a pirate (and inwardly, extremely concerned that a bandit tried to catch and sell her), and still takes her to live at Dadan's where she meets Ace.
Ace has no idea what to think of the weird fish-brat who he's now told is gonna be his sibling, and resolutely ignores Luffy. He's inwardly slightly impressed as Luffy continues to follow him through the mountain every day, not even particularly hindered by lack of legs and using a mixture of crawling, squirming, hand-walking, and ricocheting forward with rubber arms to move.
Luffy still meets Sabo the same way as canon, and is still caught by Porchemy, who at first is thrilled because a mer brat! That'll bring in WAY more money than the spare change Ace stole! But in the end, he loses his temper at Luffy's stubbornness and still beats her to a pulp.
Ace and Sabo still rescue Luffy, and they still exchange sake cups and become brothers.
Yes, brothers.
Because at this point, neither Ace nor Sabo nor any of the bandits, nor anyone really on Dawn island save Makino and Garp actually know that Luffy's a girl. Not even Luffy.
The three brothers promise to each other that they'll all leave the island when they turn seventeen, setting out to sea to become pirates (Ace and Sabo are honestly a little concerned, given how often people try to sell Luffy, and how despite aquatic appearances Luffy's vulnerable af in water, but decide to wait and see. They have seven years together, Luffy ten until seventeen, who knows how much stronger their baby brother will get in that time).
Sabo "dies."
Ace and Luffy continue to train, and things don't change until Ace is seventeen, shortly before he sets out to sea.
He's let Luffy crawl into his blanket to sleep with him (partially cold-blooded, Lu gets cold easily when inactive), and Ace realizes that his lil brother's chest feels a bit lumpy.
Concerned, he makes Luffy have it checked out by the bandits, who are shocked to find developing...breasts?
That can't be right...right?
Dadan makes a call to Garp, who snorts and says of COURSE Luffy's a girl, didn't he say granddaughter?
No, he had not, he had only mentioned "grand child."
Everyone is shocked, but none more so than Ace, who really doesn't know what to do with this new information.
(Luffy's not quite sure what a "girl" is, and when she asks Ace, Ace honestly doesn't know how to define "girl" either, so she doesn't get what the big deal is)
Ace realizes he's troubled because he can't remember the number of times he's rescued Luffy from potential traffickers, and the number of times he's heard the lament, "Pity it's not female, it'd be worth quadruple," from the kidnappers before he beats them to a pulp.
He already had doubts about letting Luffy go out to sea alone, three years after he's left. But now knowing that Luffy's a girl, and one of the most sought-after species that traffickers target...he knows the world out there is much bigger than a teeny peaceful East Blue island, and Luffy may not get lucky every time, and may not be strong enough in just three years.
But at the same time, it's not like he can order her to stay here. There's no way Luffy'd listen; the sea calls to her, freedom calls to her, and Ace understands that more than anyone.
Sabo, Ace thinks, what would you do?
The night before he leaves, Ace tells Luffy that there's been a change of plans.
He's still leaving for sea. He's going to get stronger, and work his way towards becoming Pirate King.
BUT, three years later, Luffy will NOT leave Dawn Island alone.
Ace promises that he'll come back, a stronger pirate capable of looking out for his baby brother (because girl or not, they exchanged vows of brotherhood, and that's something that can't be changed).
He refuses to let Luffy be his captain, he's still got his pride, but maybe, maybe if Luffy becomes strong enough, he'll let her be co-Captain.
Luffy is thrilled, because she wanted to be pirates WITH Ace, and grudgingly accepts the compromise, and promises to train and wait for Ace's return.
Ace leaves Dawn island, and makes a name for himself on the Grand Line (he's PISSED when he finds out he's eaten a devil fruit, because now how's he supposed to rescue Lu from drowning when he can't swim himself???).
He even eventually makes it to Whitebeard, and eventually comes to admire the man. Whitebeard invites him to his crew, and Ace honestly replies that a large part of him wants to accept...but he can't. He promised his baby brother that they'll be pirates and co-captains together, and he can't join another pirate crew without Luffy agreeing too. Even so, and he knows it's selfish of him, he wants to call Whitebeard his father.
Whitebeard tells him that Ace is already his son, regardless of where his allegiances lie, and gives him his blessing to return to East Blue to fetch Luffy. Whitebeard laughs that he can't wait to meet the lil brat that Ace speaks so highly of, and for Ace to hurry up and come back to the New World so they can meet.
Ace plans on traveling light, his former crew all choosing to join the Whitebeard pirates except for his first mate, Deuce. Ace loves his crew, but they're also his crew, and knows that he wants to make their crew with Luffy. So he thinks he and Deuce will be a good starting point (You're just bringing me along bc you want someone who can swim on the crew, Deuce accuses).
As they're planning on leaving, Marco lets slip to fellow commander Thatch that he heard that Ace's "little brother" is actually a super cute girl.
The next morning, Thatch shows up too, insisting that he come along, because hey! He's been with the Whitebeards for ages and hasn't been to Paradise in a while, he wants some change! And won't it be nice to have someone as reliable as him along, just until they get back to the New World and reunite with the Whitebeards? Really he has no ulterior motives like wanting to check out Ace's supposedly hyper hot baby brother-sister!
Ace is suspicious, but Thatch is already on board and the other Whitebeards are already waving so he lets it go.
(Shortly after they leave, Thatch discovers a devil fruit. Deuce tells him to sell the damn thing, it'll taste like shit, but Thatch thinks boy wouldn't it be great to be able to woo Ace's hot brother with a really cool devil fruit power. So he eats it, and yeah it tastes like shit, but now he can control Darkness which is sorta badass?)
(Somewhere on the Whitebeard ships, Blackbeard is still waiting for someone to find the darkness devil fruit, and well, it doesn't happen)
Before Ace returns to Dawn Island, part of him still hopes that Luffy looks passably like a guy. Having been to Fishman island, having befriended Jinbe, he knows that while mermen can still be targeted, mermaids are exponentially more vulnerable. He's learned the kinds of clothing that can help conceal tails, and is hoping that there's a slim chance they might be able to be pirates without the world knowing that Lu's a mermaid.
His hopes are shot when Luffy rockets into his arms at the dock, and his face is immediately buried in enormous tits that definitely weren't there three years ago.
Despite Ace's growing concerns (and red face; why does he feel so hot??? It's not his devil fruit...), Ace lets Luffy give Deuce a beating (why me?!) to claim her position as Ace's Co-Captain of the newly established ASL pirates (because if we're pirates together, Sabo has to be with us too!).
Luffy's gotten a lot stronger, but is still utterly ignorant of the outside world and the dangers it holds (such as the drooling Thatch who immediately wins Luffy over with his cooking despite Ace's burning glares). She's reckless and falls into the ocean every damn day, and while Deuce dives in after her and they've discovered her useful ability to talk to fish to ask for help, it still gives Ace heart attacks.
They still pick up more crew members while in East Blue, including Roronoa Zoro, Usopp, and Sanji, a pervy cook who competes daily with Thatch for Luffy's affections through food (Luffy appreciates the food).
At Arlong Park, Luffy encounters fishmen for the first time in her life. Arlong mocks Luffy's choice of friends and family, and invites her to join his crew made of her own kind. Fishmen and mer are the superior race, and Luffy will make a fine wife, Arlong says.
Luffy breaks his nose off, and Nami joins their crew.
Luffy's chosen mode of transportation is on the back of one of her sturdier crew mates, usually Ace, but often Zoro too. She unfortunately hates all the long skirts/robes Ace suggested for her to hide her tail, and so Ace has decided that being as intimidating as possible while carrying his brother glued to his back is the only way to go.
Needless to say, news of the former Spade Pirates Captain + Whitebeard Commander Thatch (are they an extension of the Whitebeards??) establishing the new ASL pirates spreads fast. That, and rumors that there's a beautiful young mermaid on board who can't swim. And despite the strength of the crew and their attempts at vigilance, Luffy's still dumb and gullible, and is kidnapped (and rescued) a dozen times before they're even on the Grand Line.
(after a few times, Luffy's uncharacteristically quiet, and privately asks Ace if they can break up the crew. She's holding Ace back; she not only made him come back to her, but half their adventures just seem to be her crew rescuing her. She's strong enough to defeat enemies, but not save herself. Ace tells her to shut up, and never bring this up again; they're BROTHERS, and he's not going to leave her behind or make her abandon her dreams when she can't accomplish them alone, and that's his choice. Luffy doesn't bring it up again, but works harder than ever to become stronger and earn recognition as co-Captain when the world seems intent on thinking of her as Ace's pet.)
During one of these kidnappings, Luffy's successfully brought all the way to an auction house before her crew can rescue her. An auction house that unbeknownst to them, was under investigation by the Revolutionary Army.
Liberating slaves is an unfortunately common mission for them, and Sabo's doing final sweeps as Koala frees the last of them when he notices a tank stowed away in a corner. He's familiar with these tanks, used to showcase mermaids in the rare occasions one can be caught, and it looks empty but he's still drawn to it for some reason.
It's only when he gets closer that he notices a mermaid crumpled at the bottom of the enclosure. She's completely slumped over, and he's afraid she's already gone, even as something about her screams with familiarity.
He's cracked the tank and has reached in to pull her out, when the wall behind him explodes in flames, revealing a furious Ace who snarls at the strange man with his hands on his baby brother...
...and then Sabo's memories come back.
~~
Something like that???? For an initial HCs dump????
This AU has continued! A LOT! Check out the comics, illustrations, and text stories for this AU under the Mermaid AU section of my One Piece Masterpost!
As always, REBLOGS, tags, asks, and comments greatly appreciated!
Advance posts for this AU and more are on my Patreon! (Patreon(.)com/YukiPri)
#One Piece#MerMay#AceLu#Monkey D. Luffy#One Piece Mermaid AU#Portgas D. Ace#genderbend#YukiPri art#text headcanons#fem!Luffy#Honestly not a CLUE if this is the kind of AU that would interest people ^ ^;#Started on a whim and trying to keep my investment on it light#I have more posts planned for Patreon but idk if they'll be going public#it really depends on response so please let me know if this interests you!#I've been less invested in posting publicly recently and am trying to get that back#but i also know people don't engage in content anymore so...we'll see!!
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Armor - Oberyn Martell x Reader x Ellaria Sand - Part 3
Author’s Note: Guys, gals, and non-binary pals, I give you more Prince Oberyn. This chapter really focuses on him and reader but I promise we'll get to Ellaria soon :) For now, enjoy our favorite prince!
Summary: Oberyn visits you at King's Landing
Word Count: 4.4K
Warnings: mentions of death
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“And he was pleased?” Tyrion asked as you both sat in the peaceful library of the palace. You sat in the window sill, Tyrion at a desk not far from you.
“He was.” You confirmed. A little too pleased, but Tyrion didn’t need to know that. “The prince is certainly...passionate. He doesn’t hide much does he?”
“No...it’s an asset for him rather than a weakness. He has no secrets so there is nothing for us to exploit as an advantage over him should we have ever needed one.” Tyrion said, sighing as the wheels of his mind began turning. You could always tell when he was deep in thought. His brow furrowed and he looked somewhat distant. “We do have his passion for revenge to use against him though. He wishes to seek revenge for his sister. If we can direct that revenge towards The Mountain rather than towards my father, we may escape this wedding with all Lannisters in tact.”
“You say that as if it were a good thing.” You snipped. Tyrion eyed you with contempt.
“They are still my family. As often as I think about throwing Cersei and her demon of a son in a dark cell somewhere, they are my blood as well as king and queen regent.” He reminded with a chastising tone.
You gruffed and turned your head to look out onto the city. It was aggravating when he looked at you as if you were a child. You loved Tyrion, but sometimes his intelligence and the fact that he was a bit older annoyed you. “All I’m saying is that your sister and nephew are not the most empathetic of people. They don’t rule, they just seize power. They’re no king and queen...just tiny people wanting to feel big.”
“Your choice of words wounds me.” Tyrion teased.
You rolled your eyes and gave a small chuckle. “You are twice more human than anyone in your family and you know very well that your stature does not diminish that.” You were more scolding him than complimenting him. He knew you better than that. He gave a small chuckle, amused at your annoyance only to annoy you more.
“You are very kind to say so. I wish Cersei had your compassion. It seems nowadays she points out my stature every chance she gets.”
“It’s only because it’s her only weapon against you.” You reminded him.
Tyrion gave a small chuckle. “Let’s pray she doesn’t have one against you. Your little bit of theater upon our arrival has already put you on her bad side-“
“I don’t care what side I’m on.”
“Well you should.” Tyrion retorted. He tensed before taking pause and sighing. The pressure in his shoulders subsided as he calmed himself. “You forget that Cersei is queen regent and her son is a tyrannical king. You are skilled with a bow, but you are only one person. Cersei has an entire army and she will not hesitate to use it if you push too far.”
You were finding that King’s Landing was your least favorite place on earth. Before you could pick fights with whomever you pleased and you could get yourself out of them before anyone could inflicting any harm upon you. Being silent around someone who made your blood boil was proving difficult. How could one city harbor so many people you despised?
Before you could respond, a guard promptly entered the library, looking frantically between the two of you before his eyes settled on Tyrion. “My lord, Prince Oberyn has arrived at the palace and is waiting in the gardens.”
“I should have known he’d visit sooner or later.” Tyrion sighed and got up from his chair. He was about to leave when the guard blocked his path.
“Forgive me my lord, but his request was for the Silver Hawk specifically.”
Your eyes widened in surprise as both men eyed you curiously. “Well don’t look to me! I didn’t invite him in.” You quipped, out of defense. You knew exactly why he was here. He wasn’t going to kill you. No, he’d be too bold to do so right in the king’s palace as a guest to the royal wedding, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t threaten you.
“It seems our little hawk has made a friend.” Tyrion teased, but looked to you for further explanation.
“I have done no such thing.” You huffed as you strapped on your bow and sling of arrows, as if to prove a point. “If I had to guess, he wants me to shoot for him. Apparently, his brother told him of me and now he wants to see if the rumors are true.” You lied. He was here to threaten you, or worse, tell Tyrion about your temper while with him and his paramour in the brothel. He had just scolded you for not taking heed with the queen regent, you didn’t need to hear it again over Prince Oberyn.
“I’m sure that will go over well.” Tyrion laughed. “If you don’t want to show him you don’t have to. But you must decline him politely if that is your decision. Be cordial, but you are not entertainment.”
You smiled at your friend. Sometimes you wondered if anyone else understood you so well. “I suppose I must break it to him gently then. Maybe I’ll offer him a girl as compensation.” You laughed, though you weren’t so sure he wouldn’t hold you to that.
———————————
It was sunny outside, far too sunny for your liking. Your leather armor did not suit the beating sun. You felt beads of sweat down your back, but you ignored it. You weren’t about to meet the man you offended armorless, knowing full well that he kept a dagger on him.
You wondered the gardens a bit, but he was nowhere to be seen. You kept your eyes peeled for a flash of yellow or gold, only to be deceived by the bright flowers that surrounded you as you walked the stone path.
You finally came upon the beautiful pond that marked the middle of the garden. It was captivating, tranquil. Lilly pads with little white flowers blooming on top, and little fish swimming to the top of the water only to sink bellow its depths once more, it was enough to put you at ease, if only for a moment. Not able to resist, you let your hand skim along the surface. The cool of it sent goosebumps on your skin, what you wouldn’t give to dive in, just for a bit.
“It’s beautiful is it not?”
You shot straight up and turned at the sound of the accented voice. Sure enough, Oberyn was behind you, giving a small smile. How long has he been there? Was he watching you this whole time? He approached slowly, hands at his sides, the very picture of calm and confidence. Confident you were, calm you most certainly were not.
“It is.” You agreed, trying to remain composed. “I confess I didn’t know it was here until just now.”
“The palace seems to have many hidden beauties.” He charmed with a grin.
You rolled your eyes, if only to have an excuse to avoid his gaze. “Prince Oberyn I already made it clear I-“
“I’m here to apologize.” He interrupted. His features softened. It amazed you how he could switch between the sultry, arrogant prince you thought him to be to...this. He just seemed like a man, not the prince of Dorne. “Well partially.” He laughed as he looked up to the sky for a moment, before returning to you. “Ellaria and I, we do not hide our desires. You are a beautiful woman, we do not take such beauty for granted.” He explained, his brown eyes meeting yours.
Even then you still didn’t understand.
“But,” he continued, “we...disrespected you when it was not our intention, and for that, I give my sincerest apologies.”
Part of your job was to detect liars, and although you suspected Oberyn could be a very good one, you were confident you could tell when he was being deceptive. But now...Well...You figured it would be hard for a man who was prideful and arrogant by nature to feign sincere regret. But there was no give, no sign of false pretense or acting.
You turned away from him, looking out into the water to clear your thoughts before replying. His gaze did not make it easy.
“Perhaps,” you began hesitantly, “I should not have threatened you before leaving. But I am not a prize to be wanted Prince Oberyn. I’m a soldier, and I’ve worked hard to be treated as such.”
Oberyn nodded and looked out into the water, his brows furrowed. You could tell he was thinking deeply about something, but you couldn’t tell what occupied his thoughts. “Men do not take you seriously because you are a woman?”
You eyed him in confusion. “Does that surprise you?”
“We do not define people by their gender in Dorne.” Oberyn stated simply. “Women are treated equally, they are no less capable than any man. A person is defined by their character regardless of gender. Though I should not be surprised. Women are mistreated in many places, and each time I encounter it, it breaks my heart. I think of my girls, and my sister, Ellia.”
“You have daughters?” You asked, surprised .
Oberyn smiled fondly. “I have eight daughters.”
“Eight daughters?!” You quipped before forcing your mouth shut again. Your mind raced, trying to imagine Oberyn with one daughter, but eight?! “How you and Ellaria manage to leave Dorne at all with eight daughters is beyond me.”
“They are all strong, fiercely independent women, but I worry about them. The thought of something happening to them fills me with dread. The acts of men are far too often evil, especially when women are concerned.” This particularly bothered him, and for some reason, it surprised you. You took him as the sort of man who only used women for pleasure, after all, that is what brothels were for. But the way he spoke of his children...well...no one could fake that level of sincerity, of gentleness. “They are safe in Dorne, but they all have a desire for adventure, to see lands beyond their own. I curse myself for giving them that particular trait.” He laughed.
You were stunned. Life in Dorned seemed so far removed from the life you’ve known. You had to fight for respect, to be taken seriously. Anyone who looked down on you as some little girl could be quickly silenced with a good aim and a sharp arrow. In Dorne, it seemed as if it were just given so long as the person were of good character. It seemed so simple yet imagining having such an attitude was difficult.
Not only that, but you were shocked to find that the prince seemed to agree with his land’s attitudes. It was only yesterday you thought of him as a prick who only saw women as objects of pleasure only to find that he was suddenly very open-minded and accepting.
It seemed far too good to be true.
“You are lucky to live in such a land, and your brother is wise to rule with such upstanding morals. It seems like a lovely place.” You complimented, trying your best to imagine Dorne.
“You’ve never been?” Oberyn asked curiously before you shook your head in reply. “You would like it. It is the very opposite from the North. It is warm, but lush and green. It is vibrant and warm, much like its people. Though I think you may faint from the heat with all your armor.” He teased.
Once again you rolled your eyes. “My armor protects me, especially here. No one knows who is a friend and who is a foe in this city, it’s maddening.”
“Which is partially why I am here,” Oberyn explained, looking back over to you. “Ellaria and I....we at least want to offer friendship. King’s Landing is a dangerous city, everyone needs allies. I saw you when you arrived that day, in the palace. I thought you were going to take off Cersei’s head.” He chuckled, only earning him another glare. “I do not mock you.” He clarified, still keeping a light tone. “I found it...Refreshing to see someone talk to Cersei like the queen regent she is not.”
He made it very clear that he wants to kill any Lannister that he sets his sights on.
Tyrion’s words echoed in your head and you remember the story of his sister. You didn’t dare bring it up. Not only was it none of your business, but the less he knew you knew, the better. This was the Game of Thrones, and you were a spy in the middle of it all. Friendship was not a thing you could afford, but it could be a thing you could fake.
“I’m a friend to anyone who hates the Lannisters.” You sneered while you lied right to his face. “I am loyal to Tyrion because he is nothing like his family, but that is as far as my loyalties extend. The rest of the Lannisters are terrible people who will, at least one day, pay for their crimes.”
“I’m glad we share the same feelings towards them. The Lannisters took my sister and her dear children from me and my family. I did not come here for some boy-king’s wedding.” And suddenly the charm the prince once had melted so smoothly into a fiery lust for revenge, a fire fueled by his hate for the Lannisters.
It was like looking into a mirror to see the person you once were.
“You intend on killing one of the Lannisters.” Your voice was barely a whisper. You turned to him and his eyes met yours. It scared you to see how much hate there was in them. “Seeking revenge...it won’t bring you the satisfaction you think it will, Prince Oberyn.” You warned. You weren’t sure why you cared. He was a prince who could do as he pleased. If he had a death wish that was on him, but somehow you could not shake the overwhelming sense of dread and horror at the very thought of the handsome prince’s blood being spilled.
“And you know this how?”
Too close.
“Come now, Prince Oberyn. We only just formed a truce, can’t reveal all my secrets just yet.” It was a tease laced with a warning. You weren’t stupid. Getting you to open up only to use it to betray you later, it was the oldest trick in the book. You didn’t even tell Tyrion anything about yourself for ages, and you liked Tyrion. As far as you were concerned, the Red Viper was still a threat. In another life, you could maybe appreciate Oberyn’s charm and boldness, but with all the tension surrounding the tyrannical king’s wedding, there was no time for making true friends.
Not that you couldn’t fake it, for Tyrion’s sake. Oberyn was just a pawn in this game as well, a chess piece for Tyrion to have handy when the moment was right. But if he was going to attempt the murder of a Lannister, all that would be lost. It was now you wished Tyrion was here. You had a silver tongue, but Tyrion was much better at devising plans than you were. This was his game, not yours.
Oberyn laughed and beamed at you.
It’s like the warmth of the sun settles in his chest.
“You are very wise for so young a person.”
“Not as young as you think.” You retorted sharply.
“I meant no offense.” He found himself repeating this sentence the more time he spent with you. “It was a compliment, something you clearly are not used to receiving.”
“I don’t need compliments, I know my worth.”
Oberyn turned so his whole body was facing you. You held your ground, you would not break under his gaze again. “And what if people simply wish to compliment you?”
His voice was like honey. You were suddenly conscious of your chest heavily rising and falling, aware of how close the two of you were. There was still a respectable distance between the two of you, but if felt like every slight movement was a pull towards him. You felt like a fly being lured to a spider’s web. And you thought the size of the palace made you feel small.
“Then they are wasting their breath.” You pulled yourself out of it. Now it was you who hadn’t meant to be offensive. Oberyn didn’t seem offended, he only looked at you as if you were life’s greatest mystery. You could hardly blame him, you had given him a similar look before. “I only mean that words are precious and powerful things. People should use them wisely, in the right moments, at the right times. I don’t need compliments, so you don’t have to pay me any.”
Oberyn smiled and shook his head once again. It seemed like every word you said left him deeper and deeper in thought. “And you are the decider of when is the right time and when is not?” He refuted, challenging you.
And that flash of anger you felt in the brothel came back and settled in your chest, but you buried it. You were prepared now, you wouldn’t make the same mistake twice. “I should be. I’m very rarely wrong after all”
Oberyn erupted into a hearty laugh, and even you had to crack a small smile.
“The Silver Hawk has a sense of humor! I was beginning to wonder if you were capable of smiling.” He teased.
You rolled your eyes, but there was still a small grin on your face. “Don’t get used to it.”
But Oberyn was still smiling.
Good, let him think he’s gotten my guard down.
“You are a wonder, Silver Hawk of the North. I am glad our paths have crossed, though I wish it were not under these circumstances. If Tyrion should ever relieve you of your services, even temporarily, you must come to Dorne. You would be a most welcome guest and I know my daughters would be delighted to meet someone of your skill. They are trained warriors themselves, but none of them are archers. I’m sure they would love the lessons if you were willing.”
It was a pretty thought. Traveling more, exploring Dorne, even meeting his daughters intrigued you. But it was only that, a pretty thought. “Seeing Dorne sounds...intriguing. I always try envisioning your land but I’m afraid I lack such imagination. As for your girls, I would be delighted to meet such warriors. But I am loyal to Tyrion. He pays me well and I’ve seen more of Westeros in the time I’ve been in his service than I’ve seen in my lifetime prior to being in his service. And as a Lannister, he’ll always need protection...his family has too many enemies.” You explained. That, and very deep down, you would miss him and the rest of your crew too much.
“But you are only a person. Every person longs for freedom, no?” He asked, surprised by your answer.
“I am free.” You replied more sharply than you intended. You took a deep breath and tried calming yourself. But you were not some loyal dog. You knew that Tyrion would let you leave the moment you asked him. You wanted to stay.
But Oberyn didn’t need something to use against you.
“Tyrion doesn’t keep me chained. If he did, he wouldn’t have let me speak to you so freely. I can do as I please as long as I do not neglect my responsibility and duty to protect and help him.”
“So you are free when you are not needed?”
“When I am temporarily not needed.” You retorted but calmed yourself before you could feel the flutter of anger you were used to feeling in your chest when you talked to the prince. You weren’t sure he actually meant to insult you anyhow, he was just good at doing it naturally. “With all your respect, I don’t expect you to understand. You are a prince. I don’t imagine you’ve had to fight to live or survive. You fight for your country which is honorable. We just...fight for different reasons.”
Oberyn began to walk alongside the pond. You followed suit. You’d been looking for an excuse to explore the gardens anyways. He smiled as he took in the surroundings. “I admire that, your reason is honorable as well. You fight for yourself, you honor yourself. We may not be so different as I thought. I fight for my family, but I honor myself in a much different way. To you, Ellaria and I’s advances were offensive, and again we apologize, but to us, we are simply honoring ourselves by being completely ourselves. We do not shy from our desires, life is too short to not pursue the things you want...even if things may not always go the way you think they might.” Oberyn chuckled, giving you a small nudge. You let out another small chuckle.
He wasn’t so bad.
Still a threat, but not so bad.
“I suppose there is some honor in that.” You relented. “I would only suggest taking into account who you are talking to Prince Oberyn. This is King’s Landing. Making enemies here is as easy as breathing. You almost made one this yesterday.” You joked.
“I do not care about making enemies and I care less about what people might think...until today.” He grinned at you, and your reaction was to instantly turn away. No one has ever looked at you like that. There was a gentle fondness to him that blended far too well with his confidence. You had heard only a few stories that told of his skill on the battlefield, but there was a far greater danger in his tongue than his sword.
What we’re you to say to that? He seemed to care less about what even Tyrion, the right hand of the king thought of him.
“Tell me something Prince Oberyn, and speak candidly. Why are you so interested in me? You have seen woman warriors before, your own daughters even. I have shown you nothing of my skill and even less of who I am until today. So why?” You asked before you were even sure you wanted to know the answer.
“Because you are beautiful.”
Your jaw set. Was that really it?
“And, though you are not as forward as Ellaria or I, you have the same passion, that little spark in your chest. Why do you think our sigil is a sun?” He smirked, proud of his family, his name, and his city. If you were highborn and looked like him you imagined you would have the same gusto.
"It’s alluring and I want to more. Not many people have the pleasure of meeting you. You either steal their breath with your legendary arrows or you are guarding the Little Lion. We were curious about what lies beneath your armor.”
You wanted to scream, maybe even punch him, but you remained unmoving. So this was the game they were playing. Break the Silver Hawk to get to the Lannisters. What did he take you for? A nieve girl pining for her first love?
“But-“ he continued, “the more I speak with you the more confused I am. You are a mystery, Silver Hawk, and that is your strength.”
You took notes of that. Of all things, you would believe that to be true. When you really thought about his words, you could understand what he meant. If no one knew anything about you no one would have a way to hurt you.
“And you embrace your flaws, and that is your strength.” You noted. There was an understanding between you two, an odd connection despite differences.
“Prince Oberyn.” That voice was far too familiar to you. You turned to see the golden-haired queen regent, somehow glaring at both you and the prince at the same time. “Welcome to King’s Landing. I apologize for not greeting you sooner, looks like someone beat me to it.” The queen regent flashed one of her signature fake smiles your way.
“I asked for The Silver Hawk. If I wanted you I would have asked for you.” Oberyn retorted.
Maybe you liked him more than you thought. If you couldn’t talk back to the queen, you were glad Oberyn could in your place.
The queen remained composed, but you and Oberyn were not stupid. There was rage under the calm demeanor. If there was one thing you understood about the queen regent, it was that.
“Though we welcome you to King’s Landing Prince Oberyn, in the future, the King and I will be made aware of your visits.” She addressed the prince, but glared at you.
“With all your respect,” you spat, meaning anything but, “I follow orders from the hand of the king. And I do believe Prince Oberyn made it clear that his only intention was conversing with me.”
“You have nothing to fear today, Queen Cersei.” Oberyn added.
Today...you suppressed a grin at that.
“Prince Oberyn, since you are here you must let me show you around the palace. It’s been ages since anyone from the Martell family has visited and the grounds truly are exquisite.”
Oberyn said nothing, but looked to you.
Is he asking for my permission?
“I must return to Tyrion. No doubt he’s going on about how he can’t do anything without me.” You joked, earning a small smiled from the prince. You gave a small nod towards your new companion and an even smaller one to the queen.
You turned to leave, but Oberyn’s hand clasped around your wrist. Your wild, shocked eyes met his calm, collected ones. The prince placed a small, chaste kiss to your knuckles, looking at you and grinning the entire time.
Right in front of the queen.
“Until we meet again, Silver Hawk.”
Panicked, you turned away quickly and made a beeline back to Tyrion
It was sure to go over well the next time you were burdened with the company of the queen regent.
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#armor#oberyn x reader#oberyn x you x ellaria#oberyn x reader x ellaria#oberyn martell#ellaria sand#game of thrones#game of thrones fic#got#pedro pascal#prince oberyn#oberyn martell imagine
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Mafia boss Tony sends his son Peter away at a young age to live with his aunt and uncle. Every month he goes to visit his son. Maybe he takes Peter somewhere nice like the movies or Central Park. Without fail, their nights together always ends with Tony balls deep in a sobbing Peter. A support check arrives for Peter the next morning.
Oh fuck me I love this prompt. Ty anon
Warnings: Age unspecified Peter but IMPLIED very underage, incest, noncon, creepy dark bio dad!Tony, DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT.
“You’ve grown.”
The boy sinks lower in his chair, attempting to hide behind the other side of the table. He still hasn’t looked Tony in the eyes once since he picked him up from the Parkers’. It goes beyond Peter’s regular shyness - the boy is fidgety, morose. A typical teenager, maybe. Except that he’s not.
When Tony gives him an impatient look, Peter meekly shrugs, responding without responding. He’s always been a very quiet boy, but the silent treatment is especially irritating. Tony takes a sip of his wine in an attempt to crush the feeling. Their visit’s only just begun. It’s too early to fight.
When the waiter comes to refill his glass, Tony says, “And one for him, too.” Peter looks up, shocked, adorably concerned, but the waiter doesn’t bat an eye as he fills the empty wine glass beside his iced tea. This isn’t the first time Tony’s brought his son here. Even if it had been, everyone knows they’d lose a lot more than Tony’s business if they dared refuse his request.
Peter stares at the glass once the waiter leaves. Tony smiles at him as he sips his own, but the boy’s gaze is fixated. “Drink up,” he orders softly, watching the worry deepen on Peter’s handsome face. He doesn’t move. “Drink it, Peter.”
The boy’s hands shake as he lifts the heavy glass to his lips. Everything about it reminds Tony how young his son is - the way his face scrunches up at the taste, the way he carefully lifts the glass by the bowl with both hands, not trusting himself to use the stem. The way his hands look terribly, unbelievably small, his fingers short and thin as they wrap around the wide bowl beneath the rim. He truly is just a little slip of a thing. Bigger than last month, sure, he’s at that age. But only just starting the long ascent into adulthood.
It’s only been a month since they last saw each other, but already, Peter’s hand-me-down clothes are fitting just a little better than they were before, not as loose and baggy around the ankles, not hanging as low down his thighs. The Parkers tried to dress him up, as they always do, but they seem to have some aversion to using Tony’s money to buy his son nice things. The button-up shirt and dress slacks they wrapped him in are clearly Ben’s, trimmed and hemmed amateurishly to fit tighter on Peter’s skinny body. Any charm the look has is only attributed to the fact that it’s Peter wearing it.
“Apparently I need to take you shopping,” Tony muses, mostly to himself. “Drink, Peter. We’ll have a different wine when dinner is served.”
Peter takes a long, deep breath through his nose and lifts the glass to his lips again, then steels himself and gulps the rest of the burgundy liquid down. Tony chuckles, pointedly not mentioning that the alcohol is going to hit him much faster now, and lets the boy go back to sulking, tense and silent, in his chair.
—
After dinner, Tony loads a wobbly, light-headed Peter into his car and drives him to the Hall of Science. Peter is a little more animated as they walk around and take everything in, but Tony suspects that’s mostly the alcohol’s doing. The boy still hasn’t said much and he shies away when Tony wraps an arm around his shoulders, flinching at the contact. Tony buys him a little souvenir at the giftshop and ruffles Peter’s hair when the boy mumbles a quiet thank you.
They don’t say a word on the drive to the hotel. Peter’s never once asked why Tony doesn’t bring him to the penthouse during their visits, and Tony’s in no hurry to tell him. If the Parkers have told his son what he truly does for a living, behind the scenes, Peter’s never acted differently for it. He’s still the same sullen little boy he’s always been.
The room Tony rented is a bright and vast penthouse suite that costs more money per night than the Parkers pay for their monthly mortgage. The California King bed stands in the middle of the main room like a centerpiece, drawing your gaze to it as soon as you walk through the door. Tony suspects that’s not the reason Peter hasn’t taken his wide eyes off it. He stays huddled in the foyer, fidgeting with the toy Tony bought him at NYSCI, looking terribly lost.
Tony pours himself a glass of scotch at the bar and pulls his tie free from his neck. “Come here, Peter,” he calls gently, watching the boy teeter and debate whether or not he should obey. In the end, he knows there’s nowhere else to go. He keeps his head down as he shuffles his feet forward into the room, like he’s dragging himself towards his father.
Tony sips his drink and looks the boy over. He’s growing up. Every month he gets more beautiful, his features filling out to define his gentle face. If he resembles anyone in their family, it’s Tony’s own mother, with that soft head of hair and big, dark bambi eyes.
He cups the boy’s chin, thumbing over his bottom lip. Peter’s eyes are already glazing over with tears. It makes Tony’s skin itch, all the little hairs on the back of his neck standing on end. Peter has always been so receptive to him. Always reacting. Feeling. Submitting.
He takes the back of the boy’s head to hold him still, grip tightening ever so slightly as he leans down and kisses him.
—
Harsh, labored breaths ghost over the pillows Peter’s face is buried in. Tony trails kisses over his shoulder blades, hips still gently rocking as he rides out his orgasm. Peter’s knuckles are bone-white as they clutch the sheets, strangling the soft material for all he’s worth.
Tony pants against his son’s back. The silky clutch around his softening cock is absolutely divine; warm and dripping wet where they’re still sealed together. Peter’s back trembles as he struggles to hold in his hiccuping sobs, making his tight skin dance across Tony’s lips.
“My good boy,” Tony sighs happily against Peter’s glistening skin. He kisses him again and grinds his hips against Peter’s ass, grinning when the boy whines and shivers. “Did you get off, honey? Did you come for Daddy?”
Peter gives him a stiff, curt nod, but when Tony wedges a hand beneath his hips to his pelvis, he finds his cock still hard, the tip leaking. He clicks his tongue in disapproval and wraps his hand around the boy’s shaft. “Peter. Why are you lying to me? It’s obvious you didn’t come.”
“I don’t want to,” Peter slurs into his pillow, pleading. “I just wanna go to sleep now, Dad, please.”
“That would be rude,” Tony scolds, pulling back so he can roll the boy over. Peter is quick to bury his face in his arms, trying to hide his tears, as if it’s the first time he’s ever cried during sex, and not the norm. “Let Daddy make you feel good.”
The whimper that leaves Peter’s pink little mouth when Tony swallows him down is gorgeous. He encourages Peter’s hips to rock upwards, rutting against his face, until the broken sobs turn to pleasure-filled groans. Tony trails his lips up to the head of Peter’s pretty little cock and back down, sucking hard, smiling when Peter’s hips stutter, his orgasm fast approaching.
He pulls back in time to let the boy finish all over his cute little belly. Peter’s labored breaths return to quiet sobs, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip hard enough to pierce the skin. “Don’t do that,” Tony says, pulling Peter’s lip from his teeth with the pad of his thumb. “You’ll leave a mark, Pete.”
Peter drops his arms from his face. His eyes stay glassy with tears and glued to the ceiling as Tony wipes the come from their bodies with Ben’s old dress shirt.
“I’m going to give you a little extra this month,” Tony says as he tosses the filthy shirt away. “I want you to use it to buy something nice to wear for next time. Don’t let May talk you into buying something big enough to grow into - I’m going to give you extra for a tailor, too. I want you to see one before I pick you up next month. Got it?”
Peter says nothing, his gaze still stuck to the ceiling. The goddamn silent treatment. Tony snaps his fingers in front of the boy’s face and says, “Pe-ter. I’m talking to you. Did you hear what I just said?”
A shiver wracks the boy’s body. He turns his wet-eyed gaze back to Tony’s face and nods, sullenly.
“Good. And you’re going to be a good boy and do as Daddy says?”
There’s a beat of hesitation. Then another nod, Peter’s lips parting so he can softly mutter, “Yes, Daddy,” before closing his eyes and turning away.
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This 2 part fic was written for the Secret Snusband Gift Giveaway hosted by @jurdannet and @jurdannetrevels for my lovely Knife Wife @lilacs-with-lavender.
Rating: T for Tyrannosaurus
Summary: Inspired by an episode of my favourite Cop TV show, ‘Castle’, in which a bet takes place with pretty high stakes, although the plotline has been tweaked to fit this fandom. My Knife Wife said she loved the Enemies to Lovers trope so that’s what I’ve (tried to) write here and I hope you enjoy the story of Homicide Detectives Jude Duarte and Cardan Greenbriar and their mutual enmity.
Warnings: Not so graphic descriptions of murder and mention of drugs. (Really not sure what I need to tag, so please let me know if I’ve missed something.)
Posted as a Gift on AO3 | Part 1 | Masterlist
Part 2
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“Lil, It’s 7.15 and I still need to decide on a dress, help!”
The ever helpful Liliver is currently perched on her bed, legs crossed and unruffled in stark contrast to Jude’s frantic rummaging of her sparse closet. She comes across a sparkly orange sequin dress that she holds up for her friend’s inspection.
“Honey. You’d look like a broken disco ball.”
“The girl at Saks said sequins were in.”
“She lied.”
Ugh. Damn Greenbriar for his stupid bets and his stupid dinners and his stupid brain which occasionally stumbled upon solutions. Defeat was a bitter pill to swallow.
She’s contemplating over whether to excuse herself for the night by pretending to have an infectious disease which requires keeping all other humans at a distance of five feet, when the doorbell to her apartment rings.
“Lil, would you mind answering the door for me please?” she asks, conscious of the fact that she was dressed in only her underwear.
“Sure, but when I come back you’d better not be wearing that ghastly hot pink dress I saw in there,” her friend calls as she unravels herself from the cozy mattress and leaves the room.
Foiled again. Jude’s just about out of options and the only thing that she can fathom being worse than having to be Cardan’s fake girlfriend for a night, was having to do so while being completely underdressed and out of place in a roomful of his father’s closest business associates.
“There was a package delivered to your doorstep,” Lil says as she re-enters the room, carrying a white parcel in her hands.
“A package? But I haven’t ordered anything.”
“Open it, maybe there’s a note,” she hands it over. The detective inside of Jude is wary, but she’s too curious to not open it so she gently rips open the package’s wrapping to reveal a large square box tied with a silver ribbon and tag attached to it. ‘Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo’ are the only words written on it. She knows immediately who it’s from and she feels an answering surge of anger along with an emotion that isn’t easy to decipher.
“I knew he was arrogant, but this-” She roughly unties the ribbon and tears open the lid and inside is the softest folded up material that she’s ever seen. Gently, she takes it out and it unfolds, turning into a simple but gorgeous black cocktail dress with an A-line skirt and off the shoulder sleeves, the picture of elegance.
Lil’s silver eyes are wide when she lets out a low whistle, “Damn.”
Jude is speechless.
“Wow.” Cardan’s voice sounds slightly higher pitched than usual before he clears his throat, standing just outside Jude’s doorway. “You clean up nice, detective.”
With a little help from Lil, she had accessorised the dress with a silver choker necklace that had belonged to her mother and a small velvet clutch. Her hair was carefully put up with dozens of little bobby pins and she feels sexy and ready to conquer whatever the Greenbriar family had in store for her.
Cardan himself is dressed in a coal coloured suit, a silky scrap of fabric tucked into his jacket pocket, shiny enough to match his eyes. There’s the faintest shimmer of gold on his defined cheekbones and his curly locks are just untidy enough to look stylish and it’s unfair how handsome he is.
“So do you.”
He steps back and holds out his arm for her in the way that gentlemen did in those historical dramas that Lil was always forcing her to watch and it shouldn’t have made her blush as she clutches the soft fabric covering his arm, but it did. She blames it on the corridor’s harsh fluorescent lighting.
Together they glide to the elevator and wordlessy head to the garage where Cardan’s sleek grey Maserati stands out amidst the other rundown cars belonging to the other apartment tenants, her neighbours, yet another reminder of all the differences between the two of them.
“Your carriage awaits you, my lady,” he opens the door for her, something that most of her few disastrous dates had neglected to do in the past and she’s so used to thinking of him as an indecorous scoundrel that him being so courteous was almost unwelcome. She’s not used to spending time with him outside of work and she’s strangely out of her element.
Cardan goes round and gets in on the other side and Jude secures her seatbelt as he starts up the car and swivels his head around to watch the back of the car before reversing.
They’re cruising along in his car and the only noise is the smooth purr of the Maserati and it smells of the pine air freshener that he’s pinned up to the rearview mirror. She leans back in her smooth leather seat and watches as they pass by buildings and skyscrapers and shops, the city buzzing with nightlife.
“So, what exactly is it that I’ve gotten myself into?”
Cardan takes his eyes off of the road to shoot her a swift glance before focusing back ahead of him, one hand on the steering wheel and the other on the gear stick.
“Well, it’s a dinner party with some of my father’s closest friends, all of them snobs and all of them with their own agendas. I suppose I should also mention that this party is to celebrate the win of his company’s recent lawsuit.”
“Sounds like it’ll be wonderful.” Her words are dry with sarcasm. She has no desire to spend the night making polite conversation with aristocratic stiff necks who would look down upon her, but a bet was a bet and she had to admit that so far Cardan wasn’t making her regret her decision to agree to his challenge.
He surprises her by letting out a low and husky laugh, “You have no idea.”
There’s an awkward silence.
“Thanks for the dress, by the way.”
“You’re welcome.”
For the short remainder of the ride the only sound that can be heard are the songs being played on the radio.
The party is in high swing by the time they get there, champagne glasses clink, waiters in their smart uniforms walk around carrying trays of hors d'œuvre and the low rumble of conversation and piano music fills the air. The private outdoor venue is large and there are fairy lights strung on the bordering walls and tea candles on each table, creating an overwhelming effect.
There’s a slightly raised ramp at the other end of the entrance where a podium had been set up, complete with a banner displaying a fancy script that reads ‘Elfhame Enterprises’, which was the name of Cardan’s father, Eldred Greenbriar’s company.
Cardan has been holding her hand since he opened the car door once again for her and now, standing at the entrance of the party and waiting for his invitation to be accepted by the guard stationed at the gate, he squeezes her hand tightly in his and the act seems unconscious. There’s a tension clearly written on his face.
For once she doesn’t need to raise her head to speak to him, thanks to her three inch heels and she leans over to discreetly whisper in his ear, “You ok?”
This time the gentle squeeze that he gives her is definitely on purpose.
“I’m fine.” There’s the smallest of curves to his lips.
A diminutive lady with pale skin and Cardan’s sharp cheekbones and raven hair bustles up to them, a long stemmed wine glass filled to the brim held loosely in her hand. Jewels glistened on her long and low-cut gown, adding to the air of opulence that she exuded.
“Cardan, you’ve finally arrived. Oh and you’ve brought someone with you!”
“Hello, mother.” There’s a tightness in his smile. “Yes I did, allow me to introduce you to Jude Duarte.”
Stepping forward she firmly holds out her hand to Cardan’s mother and is graced with the barest of shakes in return, “You may call me Ma’am.”
Ma’am?
“Of course, thank you...Ma’am.”
Mrs. Greenbriar gives Jude a long and thorough onceover, dissecting her with cold eyes as if she were a mere insect and the feeling is extremely disconcerting. She looks to Cardan for support, but he looks just as out of depth offering her a look of sympathy with the features that so resembled his mother’s.
“So, Judie, what exactly is it that you do?”
She stands taller and staunchly replies, “I’m a Homicide Detective for the 12th precinct.”
“Ah. I see.” The words reverberate with barely hidden disappointment and distaste and just like that she no longer pays Jude any attention, turning to her son and reaching out to possessively clutch his arm and whisper something in his ear which makes him tighten his jaw further before bouncing off, wine spilling over from her glass.
“That was my mother.” Cardan says, unnecessarily.
“Right.” Jude couldn’t help what but wonder about what sort of a childhood he would have had to endure. Perhaps his mother hadn’t always been so disparaging. It seemed that there was a whole different side to Cardan’s life that she’d never known about.
“She's - hard to explain. I apologise for her behaviour though, she shouldn’t have treated you that way.” He’s sincere, but there’s also an underlying note of sadness. The type of sorrow that you would feel if you were let down yet again by someone that you always gave second chances to. Her heart gives a pang on his behalf. Before she can reassure him he continues, as if desperate to push the subject behind them. “Anyways, let me go get you a drink, what’ll you have?”
To the side of the grounds is a long table covered with a white cloth with various bottles of alcohol lined upon it, their colourful glasses glinting under the fairy lights. Behind the bar there’s a bartender in uniform, smoothly mixing drinks to order as rich elites look on.
“Um, maybe a Martini?” She names the first drink that comes to mind.
“A Martini, huh? Dirty, perhaps?” His trademark flirty smirk makes a reappearance and Jude knows exactly how to handle it.
“Yup.” She pops the ‘p’ in what she hopes is a seductive manner. “Just the way I like it.”
His pupils seem to darken just the tiniest bit and his mouth makes a slight ‘O’ shape before he promptly turns on his heel in the direction of the bar muttering, “I’ll be right back.”
After a few moments of standing near the entrance, moving only to accept a smoked salmon canape from a passing waiter, Jude pulls out her phone from her purse to find multiple texts from Lil.
So? How’s it going?
If you need me to call and be your ‘family emergency’ so you can escape, I can totally do that, just say the word.
Jude
Jude
Judeee
You alive?
Biting back a grin she reassures her dramatic friend that she was definitely still alive. She’s just pressed send when she senses someone’s stare on her and something about it makes her skin crawl. She looks up and is met by the sight of a tall girl in a jade green V-cut and backless dress with vibrant blue hair. Nicasia.
“Why, Judie, fancy seeing you here!” Jude inwardly grimaces. Nicasia’s voice hadn’t gotten any less painful to hear since their last encounter. Standing in front of her now, she can’t help but think that she looked slightly ridiculous in all her fripperies, opaque pearls dangled from her ears and around her neck, gemstones glistening on her hair and cerulean eyeshadow that completely overshadowed the rest of her face. Strange to think that the last time they’d met, Jude had been plagued with envy, not even really knowing why.
She plasters a carefully manufactured, artificial smile on her face. “Nicky! What a delight to see you again!”
Nicasia’s face twists for a mere second before her cheerful and friendly facade is back in place. “Quite. Although, I can’t imagine how you’ve come to be here.”
Her words are clearly a question, one that Jude answers beamingly, “Oh, I’m here with Cardan. As his date.”
She watches as the blue-haired girl’s eyebrows fly up her forehead, unable to contain her surprise. Jude knows a moment of smug victory and Cardan chooses this moment to walk up behind her carrying two cocktail glasses in his hands. He stops right next to her, handing her a glass with clear liquid and an orange twist inside it before slipping an arm around her waist, sending a zing up her spine. What the hell did he think he was doing? She briefly considers shaking him off, before realizing that he was holding her this way for Nicasia’s benefit. After all, she was his pretend girlfriend for the night.
“Nicasia! How lovely to bump into you!” His smile is just as fake as Jude’s had been and that fact shouldn’t give her a moment of satisfaction but it did.
“Why hello there Car! Yes your mother invited me, wasn’t that sweet of her? And I was just talking to Judie over here, it’s been lovely seeing her again.” She brings a hand up to her neck and starts twirling a pearl necklace. “I didn’t realise you two were an item?”
Cardan holds her even tighter against him. “Well, what can I say, she swept me off my feet.”
He turns his face to her and gives her a subtle wink before molding his expression into an excruciatingly sappy look of affection, the kind that only existed in extremely cheesy early 2000s Disney movies. Suppressing a smile she returns the look to the best of her abilities.
“Aww, Honey Bunch, you are too adorable!”
Go big or go home, right?
Cardan has difficulty not breaking into laughter but he manages to hide the hysteric sound that leaves his mouth as a deep cough and if this charade went on for much longer she didn’t think she could resist cracking up either.
“Only for you, Kitten.” That almost undoes her.
Nicasia makes a low sound of disgust at their little act and barely bothers to make up an excuse for herself before stalking off, her stilettos clicking against the paved pathway.
“Oh thank God she’s gone, I was afraid that we’d be regaled with ‘Nicasia’s Trials During Sea Travels, A Saga; Part II.’” He’s referring to her last conversation with Nicasia when she had dropped by the precinct to drop something off for him and had ended up spending almost half an hour recounting her issues with sea-sickness. By the end of that half hour Jude had felt like clawing her eyeballs out.
She can’t help but laugh at both his comment and the recollection of their ridiculous masquerade and he rewards her with a look of astonishment, before a slow smile spreads over his face, eyes unbearably soft. “There’s that laugh.”
He’s referring to their conversation at Fair Folk Inks when he’d accused her of being uptight. The recollection should prompt Jude to make a snappy retort, but instead she simply swallows against the sudden lump growing in her throat and her heart is beating quick enough for her to hear. What on Earth was going on? This entire night had felt strangely like being stuck in limbo, her and Cardan shedding their competitive workplace relationship for one that was a lot more informal, a lot more together.
She takes a sip of the forgotten Martini in her hand, trying to push her errant thoughts away. Before she can think of a way to defuse the situation, the tinkling sound of metal being struck against a glass rings out through the night air.
Unnoticed by her, an elderly gentleman in a midnight blue suit that contrasted heavily with his bright blonde hair and owlish bronze eyes had stepped up to the podium. In his ring clad hands he held a wine glass and a fork, explaining the sound that she had heard earlier. Standing a little behind him but at his side is Mrs. Greenbriar, gripping a re-filled glass of wine. There also appears to be someone else standing next to her on the ramp, but the crowd around it is so thick that Jude can’t quite make him out.
“And there’s good ole’ Dad.” Her date for the night doesn’t sound at all enthusiastic about the appearance of his sire at the podium. “Looks like he’s about to grace us with an Eldred speech.”
And indeed, the old man waits until everyone is paying attention to him before he sets down the fork and raises his full glass in the air as he speaks. “Ladies and Gentlemen, as I’m sure you all know; since otherwise all you blighters wouldn’t be here,” there’s a slight smattering of obligatory laughter, “Elfhame Enterprises has recently undergone a lawsuit, which we came out of with a resounding victory against the Seelie Corporation, as everyone knew we would. Nevertheless, let us raise our glasses in celebration and as a toast to many more years of victories and resounding successes!”
United, his entire audience dutifully raises their glasses in a toast and downs the contents, Jude herself takes the smallest of sips from her Martini out of respect, although the alcohol tastes more bitter than before. She had never been a huge fan of these big businesses that bribed and blackmailed and pocketed money for themselves at the cost of so many others and she’d been a detective for long enough to cement that dislike. Then, she makes the startling discovery that Cardan himself had not raised his glass, nor taken a sip, instead, the hand that clutched his drink was doing so so tightly that his knuckles had turned white. Before she has the time to question his surprising behaviour Eldred continues speaking.
“In regards to the many years to come for Elfhame Enterprises, well, as you all know I’m not as young as I once was, although I can definitely still party the way I used to,” more polite laughter,
“and it is very likely that I shall be retiring for good in a few years. Until that bittersweet moment arrives however, I am glad to announce that working right along beside me and learning the ropes will be my heir and the man to whom the running of my wonderful company will fall to...my beloved elder son, Dain Greenbriar!”
If a meteor had just flown across the sky and landed two feet away from her, Jude couldn’t have been more shocked than she was at that moment. Cardan had a brother.
She watches in slow motion as the previously hidden figure beside the now jubilant Mrs. Greenbriar steps forward to stand by his father. Unlike Cardan, Dain was the picture of his father, except 30 years younger. His blonde hair was light and shiny and his face was harsh and unforgiving, the angles seeming as sharp as a blade. His handsome but smug smile rubs Jude the wrong way, making her instantly dislike him. Next to her, Cardan wears a shield of uncaring resignation, but whilst she watches him watching his family, there’s an underlying sadness seeping from his countenance and she knows him well enough to detect it.
Jude had always taken Cardan at surface level, he was rich, came from a wealthy family with high connections and lots of influence and he was also a playboy. To her, that meant he had been given an easy life, one where he never had to work hard for anything and got a free pass into doing whatever he liked, so very different from the life that she had lived with her struggling single mother after her father had passed away during an accident at his forge. And now it looked like her disdain for his background had been unfounded. His mother seemed to only care about money and positions, his father was no better and from the self-satisfied grin on Dain’s face she could surmise that he was the golden child of the family, coveted by all and ‘overshadower’ of his younger brother.
The same younger brother whose existence his entire family and their friends seemed to have forgotten about.
Enough was enough.
She deposits her Martini onto a passing tray and does the same with Cardan’s untouched one which she wrestles from his tight grip, before reaching out to take his hand in hers. He tilts his head and considers her for a moment before surrendering with a slight shrug, his usual debonair sucked out of him.
“Come on, let’s get out of here.” She drags him out through the entrance, not stopping to consider if any of the guests was watching them in the turmoil of congratulating Dain and his father.
The moment they’re out of the gates she stumbles into a nearby deserted alleyway, towing a bemused Cardan along with her. They come to a sudden stop right next to a streetlight, and unhesitatingly Jude plonks herself down onto the relatively clean looking sidewalk, with no regard for her new dress.
“Sit.” She pats on an empty spot next to her.
Cardan raises an eyebrow at her, before giving in and seating himself in the place she’d indicated. Her heel clad legs stretch out next to his feet encased by fancy leather Oxford’s.
“Talk.” She silently encourages him with her eyes.
“I-” He starts, then stops. Struggling to meet her steady gaze he finally bows his head and forces himself to speak. “I suppose you could say that my family has never been the most loving,” understatement she thinks, “and ever since the day I was born I was nothing like my big brother, he talked; I watched, he walked; I crawled and it was always like that. He would excel at school, I used to run riot with my friends. I always knew that they loved him more.
“When it was time for me to find a job, I knew that I didn’t want anything to do with the corporate world, I’d seen what it did to my parents and my brother and I wanted nothing to do with it. So I decided I’d do the exact opposite. I’d try my hardest to fight for justice and go against everything that my family stood for, corruption, money and power. That’s why I became a cop, why I enrolled at the academy, why I used my father’s blood money to pay the fees, so I could give back to the community in even some small way. Needless to say, my parents weren’t very happy with that decision.”
His words hit Jude like a volley of arrows. She’d been so very, very wrong about the man sitting next to her. This man who fought so hard to escape his family’s legacy. Regret rushes through her and reaches out for his hand and squeezes it gently, the way he’d done to her earlier.
“Cardan, listen to me, what your family thinks about you doesn’t matter. I wish that you’d grown up with parents and a brother who loved and treasured you the way you deserved, but you know what?
“I think you should be proud of who you are. Because everything that you’ve been through has made you who you are today; Cardan Greenbriar, a pretty smart cop - despite what I said earlier, it wasn’t true and I’m extremely sorry for it - and a partner who always keeps up with me and someone whom I wouldn’t hesitate to entrust my life to and the man who manages to charm everyone in the precinct with his magnetism.”
He’s squeezing her hand right back and his eyes are glistening suspiciously as they burn into hers. A shaky smile manifests at her last few words after which he looks down once again and mutters, “not everyone.”
“Huh?”
“Not everyone.” His voice is stronger now when he raises his head again, more combustible. “You said that I’ve charmed everyone at the precinct, but there’s one woman who appears to be immune, despite being the one woman that I’ve had feelings for for quite a while now…it’s you, Jude.”
She can hear the blood rushing in her ears as her heart thumps. He thought she was immune to him? So had she, she’d thought she hated him, but now she’s wondering if what she felt for him was so much more than hate. Yes, he had her hackles rising faster than anyone else did and his occasional arrogance was a never ending source of annoyance to her, but he was also the man who understood her when she was working overtime on a tough case, always bringing her coffee whenever she pulled an all-nighter, always making sure to inquire after her mother’s health, always making sure she had a safe way of getting home. So many times he’d helped her out in little little ways, disguising his kindness as him merely trying to get under her skin and now her oblivious self was finally starting to realize it.
He smells like pine and Cardan in the aftermath of his confession, and he’d called her Jude, not ‘Duarte’ and he had feelings for her and what she’s about to do next was something that she never dreamed that she would do before, and yet, it was somehow inevitable. She leans over and kisses him.
His lips are so very soft, like a feather, and the moment they meet hers she bursts into flames. This kiss was unlike any that she had ever had before, It was a forge-fire hot conflagration and she didn’t care if it burned her. The flame that had always been there between them is stronger than ever and it felt as though all this time the ‘hate’ burning through them had been hiding a much more powerful passion beneath it.
He brings his hands up to her neck and gently tugs at the bobby pins holding up her hairdo. She barely notices as they skitter to the pavement, leaving her brown locks down for him to pull at. She does the same to him, carding her fingers through his thick curls, curls that felt as sleek as a puppy’s fur against her questing hands.
Panting, he pulls away first and she has to force herself not to follow his lips with hers. Slowly she opens her closed eyes and looks at him, so close now that she can see the slightest flecks of colour in his dark eyes as his breath stirs her loose hair.
“Wow. That...wow,” he babbles, “I - we should date, that was, I mean-”
“Cardan?”
“Yes?”
“Shut up and kiss me.”
He does exactly that and later, when he asks her out, she has no answer for him but ‘yes’.
The End.
-------------------------------------------------------
Liles, this fic was for you and I hope you enjoyed it. It’s been really fun getting to know more about you through our anon asks and answers and feel free to PM me anytime💕
Once again, I’m tagging: @cupcakesandkittens and @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln
Please let me know (via ask or PM) if you’d like to be added to or taken off of my taglist!
#tfota#dd writes#the folk of the air#the folk of the air fanfiction#tfota fic#secretsnusband#jurdannet#jurdannet revels#header edited by me
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Do you suppose people would find Luke and Vader’s relationship to be abusive and gross, like they do Kylo and Rey, if the OT had been released today? They’re both men and one is too old to be a love interest, but it’s a similar dynamic. Hell, Vader cut off his son’s hand! (Phasma was gonna lose a hand but that scene was cut. Thank god, I’ve cried enough over her already. XD) Do you think Luke and Vader are anything like Kylo and Rey? Also, what would you have thought if Luke gave Vader a platonic kiss? (Maybe on the cheek or forehead, I don’t want a repeat of the Reylo kiss. *gag*)
I wouldn’t consider Luke and Vader/Anakin to have the same dynamic as Rey and Kylo at all.
Rey and Kylo were initially strangers to each other, before Kylo became obsessed with her. There may or may not have been some pre-existing connection through their weird force bond, I haven’t seen that addressed in the supplemental material I read. But ultimately, their relationship is a blank slate defined by their (almost universally negative) interactions on screen.
Luke and Vader are a little more complicated than that. In one sense, they are strangers as well. They’ve had no personal interaction before the first movie, when Luke sees Vader kill Obi-Wan (and yes, there’s a parallel between Luke seeing this and Rey seeing Kylo kill Han, but that doesn’t mean the context is the same.)
But Luke has always known he had a father. He was raised with his father’s name. He has parents, of course, good ones, but they never lied to him where it counted. They presented themselves as aunt and uncle and told him what they could about this distant hero. And Luke, restless and precocious, latched on to the idea.
Then he met Obi-Wan, who re-contextualized the image of his father from a minor spice trader to a hero. Obi-Wan was clearly fond of his father and clearly grieved for him, and maybe because Luke was also suddenly grieving for his aunt and uncle, he became more focused on the legacy of his father, his name, and the Jedi.
I think in a way, it all got mixed up for him a little. His genuine admiration for the real Obi-Wan gets conflated with his longing for family. And it’s even stronger when Obi-Wan is killed. Darth Vader is the boogeyman who killed both Obi-Wan and Anakin, Luke thinks. And Luke can best honor both men by becoming a Jedi.
So this is the background from Luke’s side that we get going into Empire Strikes Back. Luke doesn’t know Darth Vader as a man, but he knows Anakin Skywalker as an idea: both as a Jedi and from Obi-Wan’s recollection. And he has the training on Dagobah that puts him face to face with the idea of the dark side and darkness within. The timing becomes significant in that respect. Luke kills his enemy on Dagobah to see his own face. And then...he meets Darth Vader and finds out the truth and the lie.
The man Luke loved may have existed once, but by the time we meet him, he’s long dead. In his place is a monster. And yes, I’d say the father-son relationship such as it is in Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi is abusive. Vader psychically terrorizes his son, stalks him, tortures his friends (...also his daughter, but he doesn’t know that) to lure him, and mutilates him. Later, he gives him to the Emperor.
Luke wants to save him though, and it’s hard to explain exactly how unexpected this plot development was in 1983. The idea of a HERO wanting to SAVE the villain instead of kill him.
And he succeeds. Darth Vader dies to save his son from the Emperor. Anakin Skywalker dies not too long after that. But he gets to say goodbye. He gets to thank his son for saving him. For bringing him back. He dies in peace.
It doesn’t change what he’s done. To Luke, to Leia, to Han, or to the galaxy. And it shouldn’t. He’s hurt a lot of people. If Vader had lived, who knows how that would have turned out. It’s probably best he didn’t.
But for Luke, he was vindicated. He was right. He’d saved his father and brought him back. And you don’t need to buy into the idea that Vader’s redemption arc was “enough” to appreciate what it meant to LUKE. And if he’d wanted to kiss his father on the forehead at that time, I would have been fine with that.
I’m not a fan of Kylo’s redemption for a lot of reasons. Mostly, because I think in the end, it happened simply because everyone expected it to. “It’s Star Wars.” But I’ll give the movie credit, that Kylo’s redemption was NOT because Rey “saved” him. She had no reason to even try. And while the hero saving the villain idea was groundbreaking in 1983, the idea of a woman forgiving a man who hurts her repeatedly and falling in love with him is not.
That said, the kiss actually didn’t bother me that much. Kylo was already dying. It was a gesture of gratitude and mercy. Love, if you like, but not necessarily romantic if you don’t want to read it that way. And if you do, well, okay. Rey’s hardly the first nineteen year old girl to make a bad romantic decision. She’s got her whole life ahead of her.
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Hey so I rambled for like a million words on Sanji’s and Zoro’s and a little bit of Luffy’s characterisation re: living for the sake of other people vs. yourself inspired by @eastdemons recent very good character analysis so I tucked it behind a read-more to spare you all
(WCI spoilers)
realised/remembered that Sanji as a child went seamlessly from being born to exist for the sake of others (his biological family), to wanting desperately to exist for the sake of others but being rejected and treated as though his very existence were a nuisance no matter how hard he tried, to finally finding a sort of unspoken crude acceptance with the Baratie and Zeff which was conditional (in his own mind) on him existing for their sake instead, that he finally had a target to project his rejected desire to be useful onto, to finally have a reason to exist and a tangible benefit he could point to - “if I weren’t here, then the Baratie wouldn’t run as smoothly, cook so nicely, defend itself so strongly”
and sure, tethering himself to that one floating restaurant meant he could never actually go out and achieve his own dreams but he was used to that, he had already accepted from childhood that his life never belonged to him, that he existed for the sake of others and self-sacrifice was naturally a part of that to the point he didn’t even consider it “sacrifice” any more but rather just the natural order of his birth. Like how you know to queue at the supermarket because that’s what your parents taught you. I don’t know if he ever even would’ve registered on a conscious level that that’s how he thought of himself? You could argue that a lot of the Straw Hats (maybe even all of them, in their own way) believe that sacrificing yourself is "natural” to do when your convictions are on the line, like Luffy’s acceptance of his fate at Loguetown, but Sanji’s is different. The Straw Hats might say, “it’s only natural to risk yourself for what you believe in,” but Sanji believes “it’s only natural that I would sacrifice myself for others.” The others all may have a sort of “put your money where your mouth is” attitude towards self-preservation (even Usopp and Nami), but moreso than any others I think Sanji says “no, the rest of you, sit down. None of you get to sacrifice yourselves, that’s foolish. Only I may die for the drama of it all”
So even at age 19 it’s not until Sanji meets the Straw Hats that he even considers the choice of living his life for himself, based on what he wants, and not what others want or need from him. Like obviously he cared about Zeff and the Baratie and he did genuinely want to see it succeed, but it wasn’t his life’s goal. He was trying to make it his life’s goal but you could see the look on his face when he talked about All Blue and traveling for his own sake. And then a bunch of smelly weird pirates crash into their restaurant and confront him with the idea that “hey, you know, your life belongs to you, and you actually have, you know, CHOICES you can make, and it’s okay for you to prioritise your own goals and live your life the way YOU want to”
You could argue that this is a recurring theme with all the Straw Hats - “personal freedom” is probably one of, if not the most prominent theme in One Piece - where most of the crew has felt like they’ve been held back from living the life they want to lead before joining the Straw Hats. Some were held back by external influences (Nami with the Arlong Pirates and Marines, Robin with the Marines again, Brook by Hogback), some by personal obstacles (Usopp’s struggles with his own cowardice, and fear of leaving the comfort of his seemingly safe village for the risk but allure of the sea). There were other members who were held back by a sense of social obligation, too - Chopper to Dr. Kureha and his memories of Hiluluk, Franky to Galley-La in general, the Franky Family, and his memories of Puffing Tom - but those were also slightly different. Chopper, who was still just a kid, all things considered, needed “permission” from his parental figure to leave home, and Franky, conversely, needed to be sure that his adoptive family-figures would be fine on their own. Sanji and Zeff obviously have a father-son relationship but Sanji didn’t need Zeff’s specific permission or approval, nor did he need reassurance that the Baratie would be okay without him - because he already KNEW he had both those things. Zeff is implied to have been trying to get Sanji to leave for a long time. What Sanji really needed was someone to tell him that he would be okay. That he could exist outside of the construct by which he defined his existence (his usefulness to Zeff and the Baratie). That this was a thing he was allowed to do. That God wouldn’t smite him where he stood if he dared to get out of bed in the morning for his own sake, and not someone else’s. And that came from meeting the Straw Hats - all of them, but Zoro a little bit more, and Luffy most of all.
Of course he still struggles with that even after joining the Straw Hats LMAO and the poor dude has a self-sacrificial streak longer than his legs. But now I’m gonna pivot into talking about how Zoro and Sanji contrast against each other in this exact regard
Of all the Straw Hats, Zoro (and I’m still not 100% up to date with the current Wano happenings so maybe we have more insight into why Zoro is the way he is but I still don’t think it could totally disrupt anything I’m about to say) is the person who is least able to identify with where Sanji is coming from but also somehow, the most?? Because Zoro is a paradox of both living fully and wholly for himself in the moment but also being someone who has dedicated his entire life to living out someone else’s dream. Like, yeah, it’s his dream, too, but it’s been made clear throughout the series that the force behind his terrifying drive is his oath to Kuina, not just his own desire to be the strongest swordsman.
But I’m not sure Zoro sees a distinction there? And I’m not sure it’s even relevant to make the distinction in the first place? Kuina has passed away, so Zoro’s own interpretation of what her dream would’ve been, how to fulfil it, and what their promise to each other means is, essentially, his own free will. Often times in fiction when you see a character living in another character’s memory they basically model themselves around what they think the other person would’ve done, but not Zoro. He doesn’t model his fighting style after Kuina’s (quite the opposite). He doesn’t train how he thinks she would’ve trained. He even went ahead and defined the parameters of their “dream” all on his own - defeating Mihawk (is that how Kuina would’ve defined “becoming the strongest swords[wo]man”?). He is, undeniably, living life however it naturally occurs to him and pursuing whatever he wants to pursue.
But Kuina is still also undeniably a fixture in his life. He still wields her sword (fingers crossed for Wano). He still thinks of her and is still driven by the bond and oath they shared when they were younger, and he still considers her father to be his mentor. He would say that he wants to become the strongest swordsman because it is his dream and also because he’s doing it for Kuina, and they would both be independently true.
And so all of this culminates into Zoro not understanding Sanji’s perspective one tiny little bit, lmao. You’d think he would because on the surface they both live for another person’s sake but when you get deeper into it they’re opposites, as is usually the way with those two. Sanji is someone who presents himself as a “lone wolf”, sort of - the strong, cool, independent “Mr. Prince” who is often separated from the other characters, working on his own. But he’s not. He defines his entire existence by his utility to others and the capacity for his sacrifice to them. That’s why he keeps TRYING to sacrifice himself for others even when it’s pretty unnecessary lmao. And Zoro is someone who readily claims to be living his life for the sake of another person, but then doesn’t give a second thought to how that person might have lived their life. He can live his own life while also living FOR someone else. That’s not a contradiction at all in his mind. Zoro has made it no secret that he would leave the Straw Hats if he had to in order to pursue his own dreams and I genuinely still think he would, as loyal as he is to Luffy (which, btw, Luffy would unequivocably support).
And so it’s why Sanji can’t understand why Zoro would fight against Mihawk knowing that he would lose, because in that moment Zoro was living blisteringly for his own sake and nothing else, because throwing yourself into a fight you KNOW you will lose simply because it’s what you WANT is the culmination of “living your own life”. To Sanji, that makes no sense, because Zoro could still live and be useful to others. Sanji completely understands dying to protect others and so thinks dying because of your own resolutions would be a “waste”. And it’s why Sanji left so easily in WCI, and why Zoro couldn’t/can’t understand that, because to Sanji it made sense in what he still believed to be true in his mind - that he ultimately only existed to be useful to others, and that his brief sojourn with the Straw Hats had been fun, but that leaving them would be inevitable, because it was too “selfish” on his part to dare to live life for himself and that the universe would correct itself eventually. He still thought that it was wrong of him to live his own life. He still, on some level, thought that his life belonged to someone else. And at least, like this, he could save the people he actually cared about (the Straw Hats) along the way, making the best of a foregone conclusion, in his mind. I genuinely think even after everything the SHs went through together it wasn’t until he saw Luffy still waiting for him that it finally clicked in Sanji’s mind that he was the sole owner of his own life and that he had a choice in what he dedicated it to.
Speaking of Luffy, I think he 100% lives his own life for himself only, even more than Zoro - he sacrifices himself for others, but only because he wants to because he personally likes those people, not because he thinks it’s the “right” thing to do - but I also think he deeply understands and appreciates Sanji’s mentality in a way that Zoro doesn’t/can’t. I think Luffy learned from Shanks that the way you act/the things you do have a broader impact on the world around you, and so living life “for yourself” is something you have to do mindfully and consciously of how that will affect other people. And I think he learned about the idea of being expected to live for the purpose of others from Sabo and Ace, and the subsequent rejection of that idea. So he fully embraces the notion of living your life for yourself only, but he does so being aware of the implications that has for the other people in your life.
I don’t know if this makes any sense or if it’s still coherent at this point I have written (checks) almost 2000 words about one piece and I’m a litte embarrassed but you know what I'm just gonna hit ‘publish’ without proof reading thanks for coming to my TED Talk i’m sorry if any of these paragraphs just stopped mid-sentence as I hopped to finish off some other sentence
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More Majid Stuff
I post once in a blue moon b/c I work in random bursts and get tired easily, but here are some rambles about Majid that I’ve saved in my Notes app and probably haven’t mentioned before!
There are some rumors circulating around Majid regarding his wealth
More specifically: how he got his wealth
All these rumors range from him being a secret son of a noble family to taking shady underground jobs that paid ridiculously well
His name had been searched up more than once, but the only thing that pops up is a bakery business w/ a small branch located in the Land of Hot Sands... not too far from where Majid grew up...
Majid’s a quick learner; he just lacks the motivation lol
Tends to overthink too often, tho, coming up with detailed plans to get out of doing the most mundane stuff
Funny to watch but a pain in the ass to comprehend 😔
Although Majid tries to get out of doing most stuff, there are some things he can’t let slide
He can get picky over how some tasks are done; honestly??? this might be a good tactic on getting him to work (“Hey, Majid. Can you help set up the decorations for tonight’s party?” “No.” “Aaaa, okay, guess we’ll just have Mark do it-“ “Mark? You want to leave decorating to him? Do you want the lounge looking like a highlighter projectile vomited over the walls and ceiling? Give me those streamers. I’ll do it myself-“)
Definitely a quality over quantity kind of person; his room may be a mess of different things, but, rest assured, it’s only the best of the best of stuff that stay for long like lava lamps
I want to say that Majid is picky about a lot of things in general, but he does have his exceptions; for example: food, napping locations, job opportunities, ummm (・_・;) That’s most of what I can think of right now, dang
This pickiness is kiiind of 👉👈 referencing a trait that the Cave of Wonders has; like the whole “only a diamond in the rough shall enter here“ business that was going on idk I’m trying my best
As you can see, I went ham when it came to the “Who disturbs my slumber” line the tiger head had lol 😅(sorry that had become your defining trait, m’boi)
And the mass of riches he’s accumulated over the years was another obvious reference to the inside of the cave as well; can also act as a loose metaphor of what’s stopping him from getting the help he needs; as the treasures in the cave were put there w/ the intent of distracting a person from the ultimate goal of the magic lamp, so does his own treasures serve as a temporary distraction from moving forward in his life
But if that’s too much of a stretch, then plz slap the inner English teacher in me and then myself
Majid’s good at looking through people’s facades and judging a person’s true character, but it’s not like he does much w/ this info
Unless they try confronting him or something, he just avoids/shuts down people he gets bad vibes from
Doesn’t make tactless comments; figured out that dealing with pissed off people was more work than it’s worth
Boi tends to ask a lot of questions when speaking to other people; partly b/c of trust issues; partly b/c he might be lowkey judging you (can’t use his unique magic all the time after all :/)
He’s the type of person who acts like he knows everything, but he really doesn’t; just hates getting looked down upon in general; will bluff his way through situations by being as vague as possible
He leans towards how his mother used to speak; that is: beating around the bush
He won’t lie to you, but it might take some time until he’ll give you the whole truth; and when I say it’ll take some time, IT REALLY WILL TAKE SOME TIME B/C THIS BOY IS UNBELIEVABLY STUBBORN
Is casual to whoever he speaks to, no matter the age; if he gets extremely annoyed with someone, especially if they’re older than him, he’ll use this over exaggerated polite tone that makes it real obvious he’s fed up with them
Gets ticked off whenever anyone advises him to do anything, but he’ll still take that advice to heart
Majid’s probably tired all the time b/c of all the jewelry he’s carrying around smh
Majid sounds/looks like he’s angry all the time, but that’s just his resting face 😔; I mean, he’s always a little irritated, but it’s mostly b/c he’s stuck in that state of being forced awake from a deep afternoon nap (b/c... that’s usually what happens to him)
Plus, have you met his upperclassmen? Have you seen what was going on in Scarabia during Chapter 4?????? Have you met the headmaster of this school???????? (; ω ; )
He doesn’t like people touching stuff that’s his; same thing goes for people touching stuff in general that aren’t theirs; doesn’t like thieves (he’s stolen stuff when he was younger, but he justifies that he only did so to survive; and he’s not entirely wrong)
Ironic b/c his mom was a thief 🤭
He’s also a pretty obedient student save for the whole “trying to sleep in class w/o getting caught” thing that he’s still trying to accomplish; doesn’t like it when the professors get strict with him but will grit his teeth and bear with it
Prefers magic carpets to magic broomsticks; there’s just a lot more surface area when it comes to carpets plus he’s more familiar with the former
Spends a lot of his time in the Scarabia storage room b/c it reminds him of his bedroom back home; probably became buddies w/ Kalim’s magic carpet while he was there too
But if we’re talking about the type of people Majid could tolerate befriending uummm... maybe those with good hearts?? Idk, like those who are genuinely trying to be a good person no matter what kind of obstacles they run into (referencing how the cave of wonders only let a diamond in the rough enter)
They don’t have to be all nice or sweet, but as long as Majid can tell they have kind intentions, he won’t immediately leave them
Has a “haaah... these guys are hopeless... might as well keep an eye on them so they don’t screw up any more than they already have” attitude towards these people
Other type of person Majid would unintentionally befriend are those who are also annoyed of being told what to do by upperclassmen/authority figures; ☺️🙏 vent out your frustrations together wooo
Has some squabbles with Leona when it comes to napping locations
It’s actually pretty funny to watch b/c they both don’t want to give up their spot but also they don’t want to bother getting up
Leona wins most of the time, tho
Majid may have had a lot of energy when he was younger but now he’s a g e d
I rarely mention Majid’s lava illusion magic thing, but yeah that’s a thing; he probably won’t be able to use it to its full extent until his last year of high school and maybe a little bit later; it takes up a ton of energy; I keep on imagining him using it and joking that “aaaa the floor is lava lol”, but then I remember the psychological effects this ability has on the victim and 😬 yikes scratch that
Majid has a loud clear voice when he speaks; often startles whoever’s walking by when he naps in the shadows
As a result of spending most of his time w/o a stable support system and no one static to guide his beliefs, Majid doesn’t follow any particular religion; he does have coworkers back at the curio/appraisal/pawn shop who do, tho, and while he doesn’t entirely understand it, he respects them as much as he can
I’ve said before that Majid selfishly keeps all his wealth to himself for fear of losing his self worth, but there are some exceptions (such as to anyone he passes who’s begging in the streets, a coworker who’s struggling to make ends meet, etc.)
He’s fine with giving away some money, but not in huge amounts
And if he’s giving money to anyone, it’s done in a round about way; usually w/ a dismissive excuse
If this boi had a route, depending on how the MC acts around him, the majority of it will be spent breaking down those walls and befriending him; generally going like this: shovel all trust issues into incinerator one by one —>Get him to tolerate you —> Get him to trust you —> Befriend (?) Him —> Deal w/ his other deep seated issues —-> Romance (if we’re going for that otome game kinda thing i guess???))
I can just imagine Majid temporarily visiting the Land of Hot Sands w/ MC after befriending him and finding out the truth about his parents through his boss at the curio shop; MC encourages him to travel north to pay a visit at some facility b/c it’s rumored that at least his father is still alive
(No idea what happened to Lara; probably suffered worse consequences due to making several prison breaks; had decently powerful magical abilities, so that would probably explain the whole forced amnesia thing that happened after their disappearance)
Majid is torn b/w wanting to go alone b/c this is a personal matter (And he wants MC to be safe) and being scared of losing MC if something horrible happens to him on his journey north; he knows what it’s like to be suddenly abandoned, and he doesn’t want that for anybody, especially for someone he cares about
He doesn’t want to repeat his father’s mistakes, regardless if it was accidental or not
Majid decides to go on his own; probably had some touching parting w/ MC; maybe we’ll go full otome and have a hugging CG where he swears that he will be back for MC
And MC is just like “Aight;;; cool;;; good luck;;”; something sentimental like that
Couple of days passed; we’re worried about him
He returns with a worried look on his face before breaking into a relieved smile when he sees MC; power walks to hug them even tighter than before
Majid thanks them for all they’ve done; he then spends the rest of the day and well into the night describing all he’s experienced and his visit with his dad
They go back to NRC and Majid is less bratty than before, much to the surprise of Jamil and to the delight of Kalim; actually starts to make an effort to not push people away at every opportunity (b/c he originally felt like they all had their own hidden agenda and were just using him for their own gain, y’know)
Boi becomes even more clingy towards MC; by that, I don’t mean he’s overly attached to them (he’s afraid of making the same mistake he did in the past), but rather he shows it through light casual touches here and there (a brush of the fingers when exchanging papers, patting MC’s head when they do something well, gently tugging at their sleeve when he needs their attention) and constantly checking up on them to see how they’re doing
Awkward levels in Majid increase as he constantly wonders if he’s crossing a line when it comes to him showing any kind of affection; he doesn’t want to come off as creepy and make MC hate him
Might also resist being given love and affection at first; but once he gets used to it, he absolutely m e l t s
Cuddles are 👌; might give teary eyes if MC tries to leave early during a cuddling session, but he won’t pressure them to stay; a touch starved boi
Doesn’t think much of PDA, giving or receiving; full on making out and anything further is kind of a no-go, tho; hugging is nice and so are short and sweet kisses; will glare at anybody who says anything about it
If his s/o was clingier than he is, he might get a little embarrassed; same thing goes if his s/o was really cute
Definitely the type of boyfriend to buy random gifts for his s/o b/c these things reminded him of them
Younger Majid was in full on puppy mode all the time, or at least when he was around people he liked; also a huge people pleaser too, since he was afraid of them leaving him
He was probably reckless too in order to entertain his friends
Was really polite, especially when it came to adults; always calling them Mister and Miss(us)
He was also just loud
Future Majid (if he came to terms with most of his problems) would be more mellow than his teenage self; still anti-social but he’s less angry at the world now; would go on to own the curio shop after the previous owner passed on; reverted it into both a jewelry/appraisal shop in order to honor his father plus respect the previous owner’s memory as well
Sells and repairs jewelry and appraises supposedly rare items that come through his store; still does odd jobs for the people in the neighborhood but his prices aren’t as outrageously high as he made them when he was younger
He names the new store after his mother, at the request of his father (plus I only recently heard the song “House of Gold” by Twenty One Pilots and hnnnmmg it fits well with this golden boy)
Majid is interested in most things related to jewelry, probably subconsciously influenced by his father; this includes repairing bits of jewelry; he moves delicately when it comes to these kinds of tasks
He’s a night owl; it’s much quieter at night
Has bad posture from sleeping in different weird places
His body is prone to heating up easily; the fact that he lives in the Land of Hot Sands and was also sorted into Scarabia is just unfortunate luck
Sneaks off to cooler areas on campus in his free time to chill; one of his favorite spots is the Octavinelle lounge since it’s air conditioned and dark, and he can get away with taking a nap before going over his time limit and getting kicked out
The library is nice too (´∀`)
Would like to go to Ignihyde too, but he’s put off by the feeling of being underground (gotta have that bit of irony like Jamil being afraid of bugs 👌)
He tolerates Kalim better than Jamil; probably b/c the latter scolds him for slacking off
Actually went to Kalim for tutoring advice once before realizing part of the way that his senior had no idea what he was doing; Jamil has earned his respect when it comes to academics
Kinda jealous of the duo’s stamina; Majid’s usually heaving for air after long marches or if he’s ever chosen as a backup dancer for one of Scarabia’s many parties; he’s the ( ・∇・) least athletic of my OCs...
No, he can’t dance, but he can feign the movements well enough to not get caught
#twisted wonderland oc#twst ocs#twisted wonderland ocs#twst oc#twst oc art#art#twisted wonderland oc art#writing#my art#my post#Majid#mun taro speaks#everytime i post about my ocs i see that one twitter post flash inside my mind#the one that goes like#me to my followers: hey im sorry i havent been posting about my ocs that much but#followers: ??? wait??? you have ocs???#I LOVE SLEEPING TOO MUCH IM SORRY#anyway yeah heres my boy#its mostly just character stuff b/c ive gone over most of his background in his profile and his parents post#will i do the same for the other kids i have?? maybe if i get the energy to...#im just biased for majid#if you managed to get through everything on here congrats#you have my love and undying loyalty from now on#also i didnt really know where i was going with all of this#if it seems like im jumping from one idea to another its b/c i was
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If There’s a Place I Could Be - Chapter Eighty Nine
If There’s a Place I Could Be Tag
July 14th, 2003
Remy woke up in the middle of the night, shaking violently. He couldn’t sleep, again, because he had a nightmare about his parents, again. He ran a hand over his face and looked at Emile next to him in bed. At least his fiancé was still asleep this time. He had been waking Emile up far too often with nightmares about his parents ruining their wedding.
He hadn’t told Emile that’s what the nightmares were about recently, but he knew he couldn’t keep that secret up for very long. He just hoped that whenever it came time to invite his parents to the wedding, these nightmares would stop.
July 15th, 2003
Remy was dead on his feet, but if Emile thought that he wasn’t going to the homeless shelter, he was dead wrong. Remy had an entire day’s worth of food from Sleep Easy that hadn’t been bought, and he wanted it to go to use. He had dressed in one of his blouses and jeans the second he had gotten home, and was heading to the homeless shelter to meet up with Emile.
The second he opened the door, he could hear the children screaming in delight, no doubt playing with Emile. Remy headed to the kitchen to drop off the food before he went to check on Emile. He knocked on the door to the kids’ room and asked, “You kids busy with my fiancé or am I allowed to kiss him hello?”
Emile was currently hog-tied on the floor, and Remy had to bite his lip to keep his laughter in check. “You can say hi,” one of the boys said. “I was showing everyone the wilderness tricks my uncle taught me.”
“Ah,” Remy said. “And you’re using my fiancé as an example?” he asked.
The boy shrugged. “He volunteered.”
“I thought you were...gonna tie my hands together or something, not hog-tie me,” Emile said, wriggling on the floor. “Can you untie me yet? I’m starting to lose feeling in my feet.”
“Let ‘im go, please,” Remy sighed.
The boy nodded and gave the rope a good tug, letting Emile go in one swift movement. Emile just laid on the ground, groaning for a moment, before he sat up. “Hi, honey,” he said, kissing Remy as Remy got down on his haunches.
“I have an aunt who says you guys shouldn’t do that,” one of the girls piped up. “She’s really dumb.”
Remy laughed hard enough at that to the point he couldn’t keep his balance and collapsed on the floor in giggles. Emile shook his head. “It’s not nice to call people ‘dumb,’” he said.
“Well, my mom calls her dumb!” the girl said. “And that’s why we don’t live with her. That, and she had a baby in April. And Jessica cries all the time whenever we go over to borrow a shower.”
“You probably woke her up. Babies sleep a lot,” Emile said simply. “Is this aunt on your mom or your mother’s side?”
“My mom’s,” the girl said. “Why?”
“I’m making a blacklist of all the homophobes in town,” Remy said as he sat up with a groan. “If they’re too nasty they’re not allowed in my shop.”
“Oh. My aunt’s last name is Gaines. She’s Aunt Diane to me, though.”
“Got it,” Remy said, pulling out a notebook and writing Diane Gaines in it. “That’s another report of someone denying their family a home, which is also scummy.”
“How did you know Aunt Diane doesn’t let us live there even if we wanted to?” the girl asked.
“Because you said your aunt doesn’t like men kissing, and your moms are gay,” Remy said.
The girl sighed. “You know, some of the kids at school say I’m going to Hell ‘cause of that,” she said.
“Well, don’t tell them I said this, but those kids are dumb, too,” Remy said, barely biting back a snarl.
“Remy, that’s not nice,” Emile warned.
“Doesn’t mean it’s not true,” Remy muttered darkly.
The kids were staring at Remy like he had a second head. Emile cleared his throat. “Sorry, guys. Religion is a...sore spot for Remy sometimes,” he said awkwardly.
“Literally the only time I’ve ever been comfortable in a church is when we went together to stick it to your grandfather, and even then the prayers were weird,” Remy declared.
Emile tilted his head to the side. “You should have told me. I wouldn’t have made you go.”
“I went voluntarily,” Remy said. “The only time I was comfortable-ish was when I went voluntarily. That makes sense, doesn’t it?”
“Wait, people can force you to go to church?” one of the boys said, pulling a face.
“If those people are your parents, yes,” Remy growled. “Still hate my mom and dad for that.”
“You hate your parents?!” another girl asked, alarmed.
“Remy, maybe you should stop while you’re ahead,” Emile advised.
“Yeah, I was literally about to leave,” Remy said, shaking his head. “I’m needed in the kitchen anyway.”
“But why do you hate your parents?! Parents are always nice!” one of the boys said.
Remy could feel his emotions being pushed to their limit, and he stood up, tossing a, “Not always,” over his shoulder.
After Remy helped organize the food for the night, Bernie walked in and called Remy over. “Remy, I need a word with you,” he said.
Remy winced and complied. “Yeah, Bernie?” he asked.
“Some of the kids have come up to me and asked if I know where your parents are, and if they can hurt you still,” Bernie said. “Care to explain?”
With a sigh, Remy said, “I was tired. I didn’t keep my tongue in check properly. That’s my bad. Won’t happen again.”
“Well, I’m glad you’re considering the kids, but that’s not my concern,” Bernie said. “Were you abused?”
“According to my parents, or everyone else in my life?” Remy snarked.
Bernie blinked. “Easy, son. I just wanted to make sure you’re in a safe position.”
“Safe is relative,” Remy said, pinching his nose. “And don’t call me son today, please.”
“Is Emile hurting you?” Bernie asked.
“No, never.”
“And your parents?”
“Don’t know where I live,” Remy said. “They can’t get to me.”
Bernie nodded. “That’s good,” he said. “Long day?”
“Too long.”
“Want a chance to sit in my office instead of doing more stressful work with the kids or with the kitchen?”
Remy felt ashamed of his answer, but he nevertheless nodded his head.
Bernie led him to the back office, and Remy sat down in a chair in front of the desk heavily. “I’m sorry,” he said.
“You have nothing to apologize for,” Bernie said.
“You have children running up to you, asking you if there’s an adult equivalent of CPS that can make sure my parents don’t know where I live,” Remy scoffed. “Are you saying that doesn’t bother you?”
“I’m saying that’s not because of you,” Bernie said, sitting behind the desk and flipping through paper records. “That, Remy, is because of your parents. Not you.”
“They haunt me everywhere I go,” Remy muttered darkly.
Bernie said nothing, just looked up at Remy and waited for him to continue in his own time.
“They tried to unsuccessfully force their backwards beliefs on me. They hurt me in ways that I don’t even know how to begin to describe. My mother stalked me, my father guilt-tripped me in a letter for not going home with her. Multiple times. And you know what?” Remy’s voice was rising from a barely audible rumble to a near-shout. “Despite all that, I still want them to be proud of me! I still want their validation, their love! I still want them at my fucking wedding, whenever that happens, in a Catholic church, because Emile’s somewhat religious! They would eat me alive if they thought I was Catholic, nevermind agnostic! But I still want them there! I want them to be proud of me, dammit!” Remy slumped backwards in his seat, covering his face with his hands as he started to cry. “I want them to be proud of me, Bernie. I can’t let them go, because there’s that chance that they could change their minds.”
Bernie sat there, with his hands folded in front of him, a piercing gaze going straight through Remy’s soul. “I can see why Emile thinks you need therapy,” Bernie said drily. “Remy. Can you look at me a moment?”
Remy brought his hands down from his face and his gaze up from the floor.
“Your parents do not define your worth. You’re the only one who is allowed to do that. What they think? Doesn’t matter at the end of the day. I know, that’s easier said than done, but it’s true. And, for what it’s worth?” Bernie nodded. “I’m proud of you. Proud of you for owning up to mistakes, for the progress you’ve made, for the choice you make to continue on every day. I’m proud you’ve opened yourself up to Emile. I’m proud you’ve worked hard enough to make your own shop. And most importantly, I’m proud to call you a friend.”
Remy blinked the tears away, shaking his head. “Thank you,” he said. “I’m not trying to dismiss you. I just want someone to be proud of me as a parent, though. There’s a need there...and it doesn’t get filled by friends, though friends can help alleviate the ache.”
Bernie hummed. “You’re in contact with Emile’s parents, yes?” he asked.
“Yeah,” Remy sighed. “Why?”
“I think you should call them. Not with Emile. Just on your own. Talk to them about your life. If necessary, tell them you need someone to be proud of you, but I don’t think that will be an issue. From what Emile has told me, they shower praise and love on everyone they meet,” Bernie said. “They may ‘only’ be in-laws, but at the end of the day, they will be your parents too. Talk to them, see if them loving you fills that void at all. You might be surprised,” Bernie offered.
Remy laughed in disbelief. “Why didn’t I think of that?” he asked.
“Because you’re caught in the moment, and in the emotions,” Bernie said. “Sometimes you need someone who can cut through all that and offer you a different solution.”
Remy nodded. “Ain’t that the truth?”
“Do you feel better?” Bernie asked.
Remy nodded.
“Then I do believe we should head back out and see how much of your shop food has been claimed,” Bernie said with a smile. “Everyone loves it here.”
“Oh, come on, it would just go to waste if I didn’t bring it here, it’s nothing special,” Remy scoffed.
Bernie and Remy walked out of the office and Bernie said, “Oh, but sometimes that’s exactly why it’s special.”
Emile rushed down the hallway to them, and hugged Remy tight. “Are you okay?” he asked.
“Better,” Remy said simply. “How are the kids?”
“Worried about you. And promising not to ask any more questions about you if it means you get to play with them after dinner.”
“I’m a bit too tired to play with them,” Remy sighed. “I’m a bit too tired to work on anyone else’s finances, too, but I can go home straight after dinner. You usually can’t.”
“I’m willing to, if that’s what you need,” Emile offered.
Remy considered Bernie’s words. “No,” he said. “I think I’ll be okay. Might call Mom and Dad tonight, just to get some words of wisdom.”
“I know they’d love to hear from you,” Emile said, frowning. “What brought this on?”
Remy shrugged. “Sound advice from a friend.”
Bernie smiled and shooed them off to get their food from the kitchen. Remy felt numb most of dinner, but reassured the kids who came up to him that he was all right. The second he got the chance, however, he made his excuses and left to go home. He opened the address book and called Emile’s parents. “Hello?” Emile’s mother asked.
“Hey, Mom,” Remy sighed. “Everyone’s all right over here, but I was hoping we could just talk for a bit?”
“Oh, of course, sweetheart! What do you want to talk about?”
Remy groaned, “I had a long day at work and then when I went to volunteer at the shelter, I said some things I shouldn’t have. And it really sucked. Now the kids are worried about me and I feel like a screw-up.”
“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. You know that you’re not actually a screw-up, right? You’re incredibly bright, and sometimes we just hit our limits sooner than we expect to. No matter what happened tonight, you’re still an amazing young man. And I’m proud to have you as a son.”
Remy could feel tears coming to his eyes and he choked out, “Thank you.”
“For what?” Emile’s mom asked.
“For being you,” Remy said. “And for being here for me.”
“Remy, there’s nowhere I’d rather be.”
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if you're up for another prompt... I'm a sucker for the classic Dancer!Remus and bored Sirius there with his family, but sees this adorable talent and suddenly could not be less bored. I'm not too bothered by the dance style, but preferably not Ballet because I've seen that done a few times. Maybe Ballroom/Latin, since I project onto Remus so much 🤦♂️. But it's not that big of a deal. Thanks! You're so talented btw...
Always up for new prompts, and thank you so much! Okay I think this may turn out different to how you intended and may not be the classic dancer! Remus prompt you’re used to, but I hope you enjoy it :)
Sirius absolutely hated these events. Like, really hated them.
Because why did being wealthy mean you had to know how to ballroom dance? Or prove that you know how in this case.
It wasn’t that Sirius couldn’t dance. He’d practically been been forced to as soon as he could walk. What he hated was actually doing it.
He also hated socialising with the friends of the family who liked to attend these sorts of things as well. Because he had enough lecturing about his posture and hair and attitude and voice at home. He didn’t need it from these people as well.
So as they entered the grand ballroom, Sirius immediately walked over to a table and sat on the chair away from the dance floor, much to his parents annoyance.
He knew full well about their ulterior motive. He was seventeen. This event was usually attended by the financially elite and so was a good place to find a girl for Sirius who his parents deemed worthy.
Sirius had a few problems with this. One, social staus was neither important nor attractive to him. Two, he didn’t trust his parents taste in partners as, well, they’d married each other. Three, the ‘girl’ part was an all round bit of an issue.
He could tell Regulus secretly hated this as well, but had not been brave enough to sit with Sirius at a distance from the dance floor, so had now been partnered with a blonde girl of similar age to him.
Sirius new this period of relaxation would not last. His parents were dancing together but they were obviously scouting the crowd for somebody to pair with their eldest son.
Sirius slumped in his chair pretending to not exist on the off chance it actually came true. He couldn’t stand to watch his parents dancing any longer and so scanned the room for familiar faces of family and friends who he probably hated and would intend to avoid.
And then his eyes settled on a couple that he didn’t recognise. A girl with bright red hair who seemed to be enjoying herself but was not a great dancer. And partnering her, a tawny haired boy.
And although Sirius was in no way attracted by people’s dance ability, this guy was possibly the best dancer in the whole room and Sirius couldn’t help but be impressed at how effortlessly he lead the red haired girl.
He was tall, really tall, and quite pale as well. His hair fell slightly in front of his eyes and curled a little bit at the ends. Which Sirius decided was adorable. He had this huge smile plastered on his face. Sirius didn’t fail to notice how cute his smile was. And unlike almost every male in the room, he was not wearing black and white but instead a combination of blues and browns.
And Sirius had always preferred watching to dancing, but now he felt more adamant about this opinion than ever.
And then suddenly his parents were talking to them and they’d stopped dancing, to Sirius’s disappointment as the guy looked so good doing it. And his name was being called and he tried to disappear into his chair. Which did not work and resulted in his name just being called louder.
The boy was walking towards him and sat next to Sirius, smiling at him. Sirius blushes slightly and hated himself for it.
“I think they require your presence.” He said, still smiling sweetly. And Sirius decided this was very unfair because holy crap even his voice was attractive.
“No, I think they must mean a different Sirius.”
And to his delight, the taller boy laughed. Okay, definitely not fair, he was not allowed to have a cute laugh as well.
“Not much of a dancer?”
“Define dancing. Because if you count jumping around to loud rock music, I’m a big fan. Ballroom, not so much.”
And when he laughed again and Sirius bit his lip nervously. And now his name is being accompanied by a glare and he knew he had no choice and groaned, walking towards them.
“Good luck!” The boy called after him. And Sirius didn’t think he was capable of responding and so didn’t.
He knew exactly why he was being called. The red haired girl looked about his age and so he assumed his parents were already planning their wedding.
He breguginglg took a position to lead and they slowly began dancing.
“I’m not marrying you, by the way.” The girl sad, grinning at him.
Sirius sighed in annoyance. “Oh no, they didn’t actually mention a wedding did they!”
She laughed, “indeed they did.”
“Well don’t worry, you’re not really my type.”
The girl stood on his foot, possibly by accident but he suspected not.
“No! I didn’t mean it like that.” He said hurriedly. “I, uh. No girls, that’s my type. Not females.”
She giggled again. “I’m Lily, it’s nice to meet you.”
He introduced himself as Sirius which earned him a snarky response about how everybody knew his name due to the volume his parents had been yelling it at.
“I’ve never seen you here before.” Sirius said. Changing the tempo of their dance as the song changed.
“Oh, well, this is totally not my scene. But Remus, my friend, his father was invited and made me come along for emotional support.”
And all Sirius could think was, Remus Remus Remus Remus. Because the boy from earlier had to be who she was talking about. And he decided he loved that name.
“Is that the boy you were dancing with earlier?” Sirius asked, playing it cool. Lily nodded. “And you’re just friends?” Sirius asked coyly, winking at her.
“Yeah. He’s single if you’re interested.”
Sirius intentionally stood on her foot causing her to grimace at him. But his heart fluttered slightly, much to his annoyance, because had Lily just implied that Remus would date a guy? Nope. He was being stupid. Lily had just been joking around.
Sirius’s previous conception had been correct, she truly was quite a horrific dancer. As he spun her round, she full on tripped and Sirius quickly knelt to see if she was okay. Her laughter made it evident she was.
And suddenly Remus had appeared to check on her as well.
“I’m fine!” She assured. “But maybe Remus should take it from here.” And with that, she quickly stood and strode off. Winking at Remus who made some comment at her under his breath.
Sirius stood, staring at him awkwardly. Oh no. He had freckles. Sirius knew he was done for.
“You leading or me?” Remus asked which snapped him out of his daydream.
“Oh, uh, I thought Lily was joking about that.”
Remus widened his eyes slightly. His beautiful, green eyes flecked with specks of brown. Sirius shook his head slightly.
“We don’t have to if you don’t want to!” Remus assured.
“No,” Sirius had said that far to quickly. “No it’s fine, let’s do it. You lead?” He suggested.
And Remus smiled and obliged. Taking Sirius’s hand in his own and placing his other around the top of his back. Sirius held their arms up at head level and rested his other on top of the one locked around him.
Being in this close proximity was definitely affecting his dancing. But Remus seemed unbothered and was still leading him around expertly.
“Oh, I’m Sirius by the way!”
“Yeah, I know.” He laughed slightly. “Remus.”
“Yeah, I know.” Sirius repeated. “Lily told me.”
“You two seemed to get on well.” Remus said, grinning and raising his eyebrows.
“Yes, well, my parents basically proposed to her for me. They’re desperate to find me a girlfriend.”
“Well, she’s single, you know.” Remus said, biting his lip a little. Sirius cursed that he managed to make literally everything he did so attractive.
“Yes, and I’m gay.” Sirius confirmed. Remus chuckled slightly.
“So I’m to assume your parents don’t know?”
“I think they’d actually kill me.”
And then Remus stopped dancing and pulled away, leaving his hand on Sirius’s back but looking him in the eye.
“I’m so sorry. It sucks to have parents who don’t support you. Luckily my mum was cool with it, dad took a while to come round.”
And then Sirius swore his vision went hazy as he realised what Remus was saying. And just as he was about to enquire further, his mother appeared at his side, enquiring about the whereabouts of the girl they’d partnered him with.
Remus grinned at him for the entire duration of the discussion.
“I should probably get going, but I’ll see you around?” Remus said.
“Yeah. Yeah, well, we come here the first Saturday of every month so, maybe I’ll see you here again sometime?”
“I’d like that.”
And then he was walking off and taking Lily’s arm, before shooting him a final wave and disappearing through the door.
And Sirius is just stood there, staring at him in awe. Because Remus, adorable, not heterosexual, single Remus, said that he’d like to see him, Sirius Black, again.
#wolfstar#wolfstar drabble#wolfstar au#wolfstar prompt#wolfstar headcanon#wolfstar fanfiction#wolfstar dancing#dancer!remus#dancer!au#remus lupin x sirius black#sirius black#remus lupin#remus lupin prompt#sirius black prompt
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1912 | part 1
Title: one for my love Summary: Dean and Y/N have known each other since childhood. They've always known they would marry one day but knowing something and doing something are two different thing entirely. Pairing: Dean x Reader Word count: 5.4k Warnings: swearing, fluff, arrange marriage, slow burn and not much else. A/N: been working on this for far to long but finally have the first part ready! Read through everything but might of missed a mistake or ten. Also not the most accurate, but try my best.
series masterlist | MAIN MASTERLIST | REQUEST OPEN
The wedding dress your mother picked out was white silk with even whiter lace on the skirt, lace also covered the train. It was strange to see yourself wearing a dress like this. The collar went to just below your collar bone, letting a sliver chain with a single pear highlight your neck. Your hair was tied half up in a lose bun with the rest of your hair in curls falling down your back. The veil felt soft against your exposed arms and neck.
You turned when you hear someone walk through the door, your mother came in holding a bouquet of wild roses. "your fiancée chose them himself" she handed the roses to you. In the back of your mind the meaning of them came up. Pleasure and pain. You doubt Dean Winchester knew flowers had meaning but if he did then it was a strange message. What would be pain and what would be pleasure?
In the hand that held the bouquet you saw how your engagement rings shone in the sun light a rose quartz and dimand, pouring in from the window above. "One for my love and one for my friendship" his words were still echoing in your mind, false words only to make it seem like there was love.
"Is it time?" You looked to your mother, gripping the flowers tighter. There was no looking back after today, you would be Y/N Winchester. The marriage had been fixed since you were children. He was the heir to his family and you were the only living heir to your own family, it made sense for two powerful families to join.
"Yes dear, let me look at you" she knew you were less than happy about the match but couldn't fix it. She looked you up and down, fixing the odd thing here or there. "I wish your father was here".
"I do too" you played with a flower, keeping your eyes fixed on it. With your father being dead it meant you had to ask someone else to walk you down the aisle, in the end your mother asked your fiancée's brother, Sam. You had once been close to both the Winchesters during your childhood but they were both sent away to boarding school in England, amazingly they both had kept there original accents.
You looked back at your refection and took a deep breath, you could do this, you could do it for your father and your mother. Someone knocked on the door, you nodded for your mother to answer it. Still staring at yourself you could hear your mother talking with Sam on the other side.
Your mother stepped aside letting him into the room, he was wearing a black suit with a wild rose in his lapel. "Thanks Mrs Y/L/N" he nodded with a smile to your mother. He then look at you and smiled a little more. "I see you got the flowers Dean picked out".
You smiled back, looking to the roses again. "They're lovely".
"shall we go ahead?" he held out his arm with the same smile. You could feel the butterflies in your stomach, fearing if you spoke you'd throw up, you just nodded. You hooped your arm around his.
The carriage was outside waiting, everyone else was waiting at the chapel. You could feel your strength wavering the closer you got. Sam sensed it too and squeezed your hand giving you a reassuring smile. You closed your eyes and took one more deep breath before moving on.
Sam helped you into the carriage and then took a seat opposite you. The carriage was small enough that his knees were nearly touching yours or maybe he was just tall. "Are you ready to move into Winchester house?" he spoke suddenly making you turn from the window, where people were stood watching you past, to face him.
You chuckled, "I haven't thought about it" You blinked, all your brain power had been spend on worrying about the actual wedding you had given no thought to what would came after it. "But I guess".
"you'll love the library, I remember how much you like reading from when we were younger" Sam said still smiling.
"I'm surprised you remember, we were so young when you and Dean went away" you smiled and shook your head. "It seems like such a long time ago. I remember your father coming over for dinner once a week until-" you stopped before you upset Sam or yourself.
"Until he died" he finished looking sadly down.
"I didn't mean to upset you" you said a little louder than needed but you wanted to make sure he knew.
"I know, Y/N. I'm glad someone has memories of my father, Dean and I hardly do. Like you said we were young when we went away" he sounded resentful. You couldn't help but feel pity for him and Dean, their mother died shortly after Sam was born and their father had little to do with them after. You knew you shouldn't know half the thing you did know but one benefit of being a women was that men generally forgot you were there half the time and said whatever they wanted.
The conversation was cut off when the carriage came to a stop. You moved the curtain to see you were at the chapel. You took a moment to fix a few things. You caught another glimpse at the two rings, after today another would be added. Sam was the first to get out, holding out his hand for you.
"Thank you" you whispered looking from him to the people inside, from where you were standing you could only see he back of people's heads and the figures of a few people standing at the front. You breathed through your nose and signaled to Sam that you were ready.
The wind blew your veil from your face, the breeze made goosebumps pop up down your arms. Your mother and the bridesmaids that were all from the town got out of carriage behind you. Your mother spotted you and came running over. She didn't say anything as she fixed your veil and some hair that had fallen across your face. Everyone took their places around you before you walked in.
Your mother went to sit up front, while you waited with Sam. You heart was racing, from where you were standing now you could see Dean waiting. He was in a similar suit to Sam with the same flower. Even though they were brothers, they were so different. In your mind Sam was more beautiful with his soft features and slightly longer hair than most men had. But Dean was different, he was handsome, not that his features were hard but they were sharper and more defined, his hair was short and brushed down.
He was looking to the side, taking to one of his groomsmen. You had met him briefly at one of the engagement parties. His name was Castiel but he was known my Cas to everyone.
The piano music started when your mother took her place. With Sam still at your side you walked on, everyone had turned to watch you. Neither of the side had much family so it was rather a small wedding. Dean was watching you too, his mouth was slightly parted and you could see he was holding his breath.
Once you reached the alter, Sam took his spot behind Cas. Dean held his hand out for you, you were taken back by how cold it was, you whole body felt warmer. You held a breath and looked up at him through your veil. His green eyes were shining bright, the color from the stain glass window above everyone.
He cleared his throat and smiled. Yet another thing that was different from his brother, Dean was rare to show his truth smile. You both looked to the victor to begin.
"we are assembled here in the presence of God for the purpose of joining in marriage Y/N Y/L/N and Dean Winchester. Since we have received no lawful objections to their proposed union, let us reverently call to mind the institution, purpose, and obligations of the marriage state."
You both kept your eyes on each other as the victor spoke.
"Dean , do you solemnly declare that you take Y/N as your wife, and do you promise that you will, with the gracious help of God, love, honor, and care for her, live with her in the holy bonds of marriage according to God's ordinance, and never forsake her, so long as you both shall live?"
"I do" his voice was husky, you noticed that his eyes fluttered when he spoke.
" Y/N, do you solemnly declare that you take Dean as your husband, and do you promise that you will, with the gracious help of God, love, honor, and obey him in all things lawful, live with him in the holy bonds of marriage according to God's ordinance, and never forsake him so long as you both shall live?"
"I do" your voice felt small but it echoed off the walls and surrounded you.
Dean held on to your left hand and slipped on a sliver ring with a ruby . Rubies meant passion. Didn't they? The site alone made you caught your breath, it was so beautiful.
" According to the laws of the state and the ordinances of the church of Christ, I now pronounce you, Y/N and Dean, husband and wife, in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. What therefore God has joined together let not anyone put asunder. You may now kiss the bride"
His hands went to lift you veil that hung between you both. As he did his knuckles brushed against your cheeks and his fingers lightly touched your hair, His eyes slowly fluttered down to your lips, your did the same.
Within seconds he was kissing you, you shut your eyes in shock, gripping him with one hand but just as soon as he started he pulled away, before you could discover what kissing him made you feel.
He held your hand as you both made your way out of the chapel. The plan now was to go back to your family house for dinner and a small party, spend the night and then in the morning head off to your honeymoon. You and Dean would be spending the weekend by the sea.
"How you holding up" his green eyes were even greener when in the sun.
"I feel like I can't breathe" You smiled weakly, holding your hand over your stomach. You felt like your corset was tighter all of a sudden. You started to walk back to the carriage but stopped when Dean walked the opposite way. "Aren't you riding with me?"
"I'm driving us back" he stepped forward and gripped your hand, pulling you after him, everyone who left the chapel was watching the pair of you. Not wanting to trip over your dress you picked up the front.
"Driving?" you ask in confusion, looking back again. Everyone must of known because they were smile and getting in their own transport or starting to walk back to the house.
"thought it would be fun" he stopped you in front of a black car, with an open top. He opened the passage side and helped you get in. you unpinned the veil from you head and sat in across your lap.
"Promise not the crash" you looked up at him as he circled the car to get in the other side. He gave you a short chuckle.
"Promise, Darin'" he winked, you heart made a sudden jump.
You cleared your throat, trying to get comfortable. Thankful the weather and clear, not to warm or cold it was prefect. The whole day so far seemed perfect, maybe too prefect. You watch him as he started the car. You tried to think of something to say, after all you were married now and would need to find things to discuss.
"So, do you enjoy driving?" you realized after you spoke what a dumb question it was. You tried not to see his reaction.
"I do, I also like cars in general" his eyes were on the road but the corner of his mouth rose. "this one here is my favorite" he patted the dashboard with an even bigger smile. "She was my dad's".
"She? I didn't know cars had genders" you couldn't help but laugh a little.
"It's just something us car lovers do" he laughed shortly too.
your nerves were slowly dying down now, the conversation wasn't deep but it was a start, at least you knew one new thing about him now.
-x-
The sky was beginning to turn orange with the setting sun. The wedding dinner had been pleased enough but your nerves didn’t stay down for long. As soon as you walked in the house everything came running back.
After the dinner was finished, your mother pulled you into a corner and bombarded you with questions and answering most of them herself. You looked at her struggling to understand most of what was coming out of her mouth.
"mother!" you raised your voice so she would pay attention. "Everything is going to be fine. You need to breathe".
She breathed deeply, she held one side of your face, "I can't get over how grown up you are". You gave her a half smile. "have you packed everything you need?"
"yes, someone came over this morning to take them over the house, and my travel bag is upstairs" You nodded. You looked around the before saying, "we could delay the honeymoon if you want me to stay a few more days".
"no, don't be silly. You go and enjoy your honeymoon." she patted your back, pushing you to go back to the main room where everyone was wanting.
Over in another corner Dean and Sam were talking together. "Can't believe you're married", Sam playful hit his brother on the shoulder. They both look over to where you were stood with some guest.
Dean took a swig of his drink, he keep his eyes on you after Sam had turned away. You were looking away from them but were smiling. He barely knew you, when he thought about you all he remembered was girl who he would chase with Sam close behind.
"Neither can I, Sammy" he shook his head. He was still looking at you when you left the group you were standing with, as you moved away you caught his eyes, your E/C eyes widen and chest went tight. You had been married hours and you couldn't even met his eyes without freezing up.
You gave him a half smile before carrying on walking through the room, half of your mind was still on Dean and the few occasions you had had chance to talk today. Not paying attention you ran into someone. They reach out and held you, so you wouldn't go falling to the floor.
"You alright?" he laughed nervously, looking you and seeing it was Cas. You smiled easily back.
"yes. My mind was somewhere else" you laugh shaking your head. "long day you know" .
"I can only imagine", you didn't know Cas well but you felt relaxed when you were around him. "You look beautiful".
Looking yourself over, you exhaled. "Thank you, I don’t think I've been this nervous in my whole life".
"well if it helps you can't tell".
You laughed dryly, going stiff when a hand wrapped your lower arm. "I hope Cas, here isn't bothering you" he laughed. You tried to equal out your breathing, it took longer than you thought it should.
When you looked over your shoulder you saw Dean smiling carefree in Cas' direction. "he just saved me from landing on the floor" you grinned to Cas, who smiled back. Dean was so close you could feel his body heat on your own skin, lightly on your shoulder you could feel his steady breath.
Dean let out an chuckle, so gently it took you by surprise, you blinked up at him unsure of what you'd find. He was smiling too, a real smile. "you always did have trouble staying on your feet". His touch on your arm seemed softer. "remember that time down at the lake, you were walking across those stones and fell right in the lake".
You laughed too, that was one of the last days you spent with his family before they were sent away. The slight of you falling in the ankle deep water, nearly gave your mother a heart attack. "I was showing off". You shake your head, some more of the doubt that had clouded your mind cleared. This was a side that maybe the marriage would be good, you had something to bond on.
He shook his head, still laughing. "I used to tell the boys at school about all the things we would get up too".
You hit him playfully on the arm without thinking, "You make it sound bad", you said blushing. Cas was sipping his drink, watching you both. Dean laughed again at your reaction. You didn't say it but you felt happy he told people about you as a child, that he carried memories with him through the years.
Over the next hour you stayed with Dean and Cas and traded childhood stories and school stories. You learnt from Cas that Dean had a talent for getting in trouble with every teacher, even the local shop owners were weary of him. Your laughed more than anyone else.
You hadn't noticed the time until someone started to make an announcement. You turned to look at the front of the room where Sam was stood on top of a chair making him look even taller than normal. Once he had everyone's attention he cleared his throat. "Sadly everyone it's time to say goodnight", a mummer of aww spread through the room. "Of course you'll be invited to the next party when we welcome Y/N home. I hope you all can wait".
Dean lent closer to you so he could whisper in your ear. "I should warn you, he always makes a speech at every party", his voice was playful. He raised his glass in the air and smiled to his brother. You guess you missed something nice because the whole room was smiling and nodding in agreement. Then you though about what Dean had said, just how many parties did they have?
-x-
You and Dean stood by the doors and saw everyone off, it was a faceless blur of kisses on the cheek and people wishing you luck. The pair of you, kept the same pleasant smiles the whole time. Once everyone but family had left you breathed a sigh of relief. One more part of the day was over. The longest day of your life.
After a few duty free moments, your mother was once again by your side with your maid, Alice hidden in the shadows. When you turned you found you side where Dean was stood minutes ago was now empty. Faintly you could hear chatting from the sitting room. Your mother didn't need to speak, you knew what was next.
You picked up the front of your dress, while your mother held the train to stop you from tripping up the stairs. The only sound was of three pairs of footsteps and the distant chatter from Dean and Sam in the sitting room.
Once you entered your room you took everything in, fresh flowers, the same as the bouquet and the ones the men wore on their jackets. The fire was burning too, your skin felt hot already it felt even hotter the more you walked in. After a few more words of comfort from your mother she left you with Alice.
"I don’t know where to start" you laughed, looking down at yourself with all the lace and silk hugging against your body. As you moved you hands the three rings shined back. You didn’t want to think about the cost, one ruby, one diamond and rose quartz . You knew the Winchesters were rich but just how rich?
Ruby for passion
Diamonds for purity
Rose quartz for unconditional love
Alice walked across the room to your dresser, from the second draw she took out a another outfit made of lace. Lace and silk were the only thing you seemed to wear today. You reached out your hand and felt the night grown. It was soft, by just holding it thought you could tell how thin it would be once it was on.
You let it run through your fingers, you watched it fall like water. "I'll start on the back now" Alice said. You nodded, watching yourself in the mirror as she started on the buttons. You threw the night grown on to the near by bed and worked on letting your hair down.
Soft Y/H/C hair brushed your cheeks and neck as it fell from the bun that had held it all day. You placed the pins on the fireplace, once it was all down you ran your hands through the strands to get rid of any knots. When the dress fell to the floor you step out of it.
You shivered when you were left in nothing but an corset over a short grown, even with the heat radiating in the room you felt cold. Alice started to untie the ribbons that held the corset together. When Alice was finished you finally breathed again. As Alice helped with the grown, when she lifted over your head, you covered your bare chest with your arms, thankful you had close fitting draws on to hide your bottom.
With a little help from Alice, you finished getting dressed, she handed you your dressing grown from the back of the door. You happily took the extra layer to cover exposed skin. Staring in the mirror you tried to do something with your hair but left it natural in the end.
The sound of the door opening behind you, made both you and Alice turn to look. Light from the hallway casted a shadow on the floor, you looked from the shadow to the figure standing there waiting for permission the came in.
You were about to dismiss Alice when she passed Dean carrying your used clothes. Your mouth was still half open trying to find the words. After too long your smiled and nodded at Dean. One hand played with the rings on the other as you turned from his view. You were having a silent fight with yourself about how stupid you were being, how you couldn't find a thing to say.
"Everything good?" Dean asked from behind you, you didn’t have to look at him to see the concern his face. Panic started to fizz away, what would happen next? Would he make the first move? What would it even feel like? In the middle of your panic Dean had walked over to where you were standing.
The room felt hotter, your could felt his body heat on your own skin. You physical jumped when he touched your shoulder with his hand. You were still unsure how to feel and reacted under his touch , under his glaze. Unsure about him.
You bit the inside of your cheeks, looking at his hand still on your shoulder from the corner of your eye. "Long day" you tried to laugh lightly but it sounded empty and as unsure as you felt. He squeezed your shoulder before letting go.
You heard him walk over to the other side of the room, you heard the springs in the bed flatter as he sat down. Confused you looked towards him. He was wearing his own sleep wear and had just taken off a dressing grown that was lay on a near by chair.
He looked up at you and smiled, it was a kind smile. It had no hidden meaning, you felt calmer. You bit the inside of your cheek again as you walked over to the other side of the bed. Your hands fumbled as you took your own dressing grown off, putting it over the end of the bed frame. You couldn't bring yourself to look at him, looking at you in nothing but a night dress.
You sat on the edge of the bed and waited for him to say something else. God knew you had no clue what to say next. You could feel the bed under you move, the popping of the springs was deafening in the silent room with nothing but the fire cracking to accompany it.
"We have a long day tomorrow should get an early night" he patted the bed, you were still facing away from him. Your face broke out in confusion. Half of you was relieved that nothing was going to happen but the other half was hurt that nothing was going to happen. Was something wrong with you? Had you said something to put him off? Hadn't you said enough?
But you didn’t ask any of those questions. "you're right" you tried your best to smile, masking over anything else you might be feeling. The only light in the room was the fire, it's light was already starting to dim and by morning it would be gone.
You swung your legs on to the bed and pushed the covers down with your legs. Once you were under and laid down you didn't look at him, all you could do was stare at the ceiling.
It was strange to be in your room but without your things. They were all packed up and had been taken to your new home, this would be the last night here in this room for a while.
You didn't know how long you stared up at the ceiling before sleep over took you. You groaned as you opened your eyes and sat up in bed. You looked to your side, thinking Dean would still be there but all you found was an empty spot.
You ran a hand through your hair, brushing out some knots that had formed during the night. You stood up from the bed and reached for your dressing grown. after ringing the bell to let the maids know you were ready for breakfast you stood up.
As you waited you walked over to the widow, from the window you had a perfect view of the front garden. Out on the drive you watch the house staff getting on with their duties.
You were torn away from the window when your door opened wide, in came Alice carrying a tray with tea and some breakfast. She smiled when she saw you, "morning", she was said sweetly placing the tray down on the bed.
"morning" you smiled and sat down on the bed, pulling the tray close, making your tea the way you like it then brought the cup to your lips. You sighed looking around your room in the daylight. "do you know where Mr Winchester is?".
"I believe he has got out on a drive?" Alice said after thinking, she was getting everything ready for the day. She didn't see you bit your lip and look away. You picked at the food on your plate with no interest of eating it.
Giving up on breakfast you went over to where your clothes for the day were laid out. The dress had a plain black skirt and a lace top with a high collar, around the collar was a black ribbon. "I've been wearing so much lace recently", you laughed.
-x-
Once you were fully dressed you walked down the stairs holding your current book, the whole house is busy maids were running past you. You guessed the clean up from the wedding was pretty big.
Your mother was in the sitting room, reading the morning newspaper. She turned in your direction when she heard you. "morning dear, did you sleep well?" she smiled putting her paper down.
You took the chair closest to the fire, "after yesterday, I could of slept stood up". You held the books against your chest and watched the fire. The flames danced and shifted. From where you sat you could smell the wood burning and feel the heat. "Will you be okay here alone?".
She let out an short laugh, "of course dear". You kept your eyes on the fire, something about the way the flames moved was hypnotic. "would you like some tea?".
You pulled your eyes away from the fire and walked over to where the tea tray sat. "Do you want another cup?". She shakes her head, still reading the news. You hummed as you worked, adding lemon this time.
"Mrs Winchester" you didn't answer until your mother called your name.
Still holding your tea, you blinked towards one of the foot men who was waiting by the door, "Yes?". It was strange hearing that name being addressed to you, it had always been Miss Y/L/N and now you were someone completely different.
"Mr Winchester wanted you to know that the car will be here in one hour". He waited for you to nod before leaving you alone with your mother again.
You breathed out, walking over to where your mother sat. "I don't think I'm ready" you whispered, staring down at the liquid in your cup. All of a sudden the room felt too hot, the smell of woods was too strong and the sound was too loud.
You jumped when you felt your mother's hand touch yours. You took your eyes from your cup and over to her. "I know this is hard for you but things will get better", she squeezed your hand, all you could do was smile and hope it would be enough.
the next hour passed by quickly, you just sat there with your mother and read. Now and then she would ask you questions about the book or you opinion on the news she was reading. You only noticed the time when Alice came in to tell you the car would be here soon.
You made your way to the front hall, you took this time to look around. Pictures of past family members lined the walls, years of history around you and you were now saying goodbye to it all.
Your mother came running out of a room holding a coat for you. You took it from her gladly. You slipped it on straight away. She pulled you in for one last hug, "I'm going to miss you so much". When she pulled away you saw her eyes glassed over with tears.
She still held on to you, "I promise to come and see you when we get back". She shook her head. You ache of missing her and your childhood home was seeping through your veins. You sniffed back a sob. "I'm going to miss you and this place so much".
"my sweet girl, you'll have a family of your own soon, you won’t have time for me" she squeezed your arms as you tried to fight down the fear you felt when you thought about having children. You hadn't even been married a day, a family seemed years away. You hoped that you'd have time to grow closer with Dean before any of that came up.
You still couldn't stop thinking about the fact that you hadn't even slept with Dean yet and here your mother was talking about children. Could you even talk to her about it?
"all ready?" you and your mother move away from each other as Dean enters from the font door. You noticed how your mother smiled too wide, then glared at you hoping you had the same face but you were still trying to overcome the shock of what laid ahead.
Once he reached you, he nodded in your direction asking if you were okay. You breathlessly managed to smile and nodded back. "Is the car here?".
Dean smiled, bending down to pick up the last remaining bags, "wait until you see her. A wedding gift off Sammy". He grinned wider than you thought he could. He held out his arm for you.
Reaching out you wrapped your arm around his. "Just how many cars do you have now?", you raised an eyebrow and laughed.
"You'll have to wait and see" he grinned wider, holding on to you tighter. It had not even been a day but you picked up on how different he was around people and how he was with you.
You were lost in your mind as Dean and your mother spoke and said goodbye to each other. Feeling his body so close to yours was new and a little welcoming, you couldn't say why but it was but the thought that you didn't really know him kept creeping up and destroying any peace you tried to settle on.
But this was just the start, you had everyday now to find peace and maybe even understand who Dean really is.
-x-
part 2
please please let me know what you think! and let me know if you want to be on the tag list
#dean x reader#dean winchester#dean winchester one shot#dean winchester imagine#dean winchester fanfiction#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester fanfic#dean one shot#dean fanfic#dean reader insert#supernatural#supernatural fic#supernatural imagine
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Frank Iero, New York, NY, June 2019 (X)
Aug 29, 2019, 09:10am
Frank Iero May Just Be His Own Puppet Master
Photo Credit: Audrey Lew
Interview below the cut
Derek Scancarelli
Contributor
Hollywood & Entertainment
I am a music journalist living in New York City.
Frank Iero is breathing deeply and fighting off nausea. This isn’t uncommon for the 37-year-old guitarist and vocalist, given his predilection for debilitating anxiety. But on this occasion, it isn’t pre-show jitters.
“Oh my god, I hate this f*cking boat,” Iero says, as the docked vessel on which he sits knocks against a pier in the Lower East Side of Manhattan. Iero and his band, The Future Violents, just finished an intimate Saturday matinee show as fans sweat, sang and caught a glimpse of the Statue of Liberty.
It had been about 16 years since Iero and his now defunct band, My Chemical Romance (the band broke up in 2013), first performed on water. In July of 2002, the band released its debut album, I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love. In October of 2003, the soon-to-be emo heroes performed alongside New York Hardcore legends Sick Of It All at an aquatic gig booked by New Jersey college radio station WSOU. And in June of 2004, My Chemical Romance released Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, the band’s platinum-selling breakthrough record. In a matter of two years, Iero’s life changed dramatically.
In 2019, Iero still hasn’t found his sea legs, but a lot more has changed. He’s fathered three children, released three full-length solo records (including 2019’s Barriers), and survived a near-death experience. And as he gets older, he finds truth in life’s greatest clichés.
“Time flies, it just screams by,” Iero says. “You think you’re appreciating the time, but it’s easy to take it for granted. It’s a shame.”
But Iero is trying his hardest to pay attention to the little things, especially when it comes to family. He and his wife, Jamia, have three children together: nine-year-old twin daughters, Cherry and Lily, and a seven-year-old son named Miles.
“It’s wonderful to see them evolve and come into their own,” Iero says. “But it’s funny how personalities are innate. We shape the way they experience things or teach them the ropes, but for the most part, I’ve found that we are who we are when we’re born.”
From the start, Iero has seen an even split in the twins’ personalities. Cherry, he says, most behaves like her mother, whereas Lily possesses her father’s attitude.
“Some of the sh*t I hear coming out of my daughter's mouth,” Iero says laughing. “My God! It’s stuff I think but never say — they don't know to be ashamed yet! It's amazing and honest and pure. And I know exactly where she's coming from because I feel the same way.”
As part of fostering a relationship of trust and honesty, Iero has been age-appropriately transparent with his kids about the 2016 accident that almost killed him, his brother-in-law and guitarist Evan Nestor and his manager Paul Clegg.
While unloading gear from their van in Sydney, Australia, a city bus crashed into the group and their vehicle. In a 2017 interview with MTV, Iero recounted, in vivid detail, the moment he was dragged underneath the bumper of the bus, the screams of his brother-in-law, and the blood pooling from his manager.
Although Iero was able to walk into an ambulance carrying one of his friends, the scene was a spectacle overrun with emergency personnel — they even landed a rescue helicopter in nearby Hyde Park. Despite serious injuries, amazingly, there were no fatalities.
When Iero returned home from the hospital, he explained to his children that he was in a car accident, but that it was a singular freak incident.
“You don't want to lie,” he says. “They're getting older. Their friends and their parents are on the internet. They're asking questions. It does get back to them.”
Iero was as honest as possible, but avoided any gory details. He was also conscious that it wouldn’t be long before he would travel for work again — and he didn’t want to scare his kids any further.
Almost four years later, residual damage from the crash is impossible to ignore. Nestor has nerve damage in his leg that may never be corrected. Clegg’s leg and knee have undergone multiple surgeries, but are in poor shape. And Iero still has a tear in his shoulder that hurts every time he plays the guitar. Despite the pain, he’s afraid to undergo surgery.
“I was lucky enough to walk away and still play,” Iero says. “If I were to test fate again and go under the knife, if something were to go wrong… to let that be taken from me … no, I can't.”
On some days, the emotional toll of surviving such a traumatic accident weighs more heavily. Iero describes his recovery as non-linear: some days he feels collected and in control, other days the memory rushes back into his mind.
After his new band finished recording Barriers, Iero and his team went back to Australia for appointments pertaining to the accident and corresponding litigation. As soon as he exited the plane, Iero felt like he’d returned to the horrific scene. For the following week, he was barraged by an unending state of panic.
“You go through these instances of PTSD,” he says. “You never know what's going to trigger and send you all the way back to the beginning with recovery.”
Iero greatly underestimated how difficult his return to Australia would be. When navigating to a doctor’s office near where the accident occurred, he couldn’t bring himself to walk down the street. And suddenly, he felt surrounded by buses.
“I don't know if this is true,” he says. “But it felt like every other car on the street was one of these f*cking buses. They were everywhere. It was frightening. I couldn't do anything. I was shaking like a leaf.”
Despite the traumatic flashbacks, Iero continues to reflect on that day. In the promotional run for Barriers, he discussed the accident at length. And on the record itself, he addresses the complicated ripple effect it’s had on his entire sense of self.
“I don't think it needs to define me,” Iero says. “But it was something I needed to talk about on this record. It's not something I could sweep under the rug. But do I want to dwell on it every day and relive it? No. But I think about it constantly. I feel the pain constantly. It's on my mind.”
In recent interviews, Iero has tended to frame a few philosophical takeaways from his ordeal. In simple terms, the first idea is that he’s found a new lease on life — that everything happens for a reason and he’s been given an opportunity to seize the day. The second philosophy is much darker, a sort of survivor’s guilt compounded with fear and existential dread. The third and most abstract consideration is closest to Simulation Theory — where Iero has the ability to control his own artificial timeline.
Sometimes, Iero questions if actually died that day. He wonders: Is this all real?
“It’s hard. No one can tell you what to believe,” he says. “But you come to this realization, ‘Well, this is real to me, the hand I was dealt, so I have to make the best of it!’”
Through the acceptance of uncertainty, Iero surmises that he just may be his own puppet master.
“If this is a figment of my imagination,” Iero says. “If this is all in my head, then I am the master of my own destiny. If I want to do something, I can manufacture it. And if it's not the case, then at least it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. Maybe putting positive vibes out into the universe is beneficial. If we didn't make it and we're just going through this weird labyrinth in my mind, I can do anything I want.”
And lately, he’s been doing just that. Call it sorcery or the power of positive thinking, but Iero is motivated. For Barriers, he was able to assemble a dream band, The Future Violents (different lineups of his backing band have previously gone by The Cellabration and The Patience), featuring his brother-in-law Nestor on guitar, Thursday’s Tucker Rule on drums, Murder by Death’s Matt Armstrong on bass, and Kayleigh Goldsworthy on keyboard.
The theme of the album — and his own internal dialogue — mostly relates to tragedy and timing. Did the universe have a course set out for him? Or was he just some random victim?
“The crazy thing is that you didn't do anything wrong,” Iero says of the accident. “Yet, all of this stuff was taken from you and you have to make these decisions. You get angry a lot.”
He continues: “These random, abrupt, violent actions. Do they happen to us? Or for us? I wouldn't have been able to make this record if it didn't happen. And it made me realize a lot of things about myself. Am I happy it happened? No. But I'm happy where I am right now.”
Iero views Barriers as an exercise in vulnerability. If the aftermath of his accident taught him anything, it’s that success was meaningless to his character, but adversity helped him grow. For the first time, addressing childhood trauma helped Iero expose himself in a way that felt freeing.
“When you put something to song, it gives that memory weight,” Iero explains. “If you never talk about it, it's almost like it didn't happen. There's a fine line between relinquishing that power to this memory, situation or trauma, or holding that power over it and creating your own narrative from it.”
Barriers also intertwines Iero’s childhood experiences with his current perspective as a father. This go around, he felt comfortable writing about his parents’ divorce — the couple split when he was three and divorced when he was seven.
He looks back on the unpleasantness of the process and his consequential understanding of his mother’s issues with addiction, depression and mental illness. On his 2016 record, Parachutes, Iero first referenced his mother’s struggles and his own liability to inherit her traits. He’s still horrified by the idea of predeterminism.
“When you're a young kid being surrounded with it, it doesn't feel right,” Iero says. “You're not happy. You're scared. You're constantly concerned for your parent. It’s almost as if you become the caregiver.”
He continues: “Then you see yourself falling into these patterns that you were witness to and maybe in a roundabout way were taught. That addiction, that depression, runs through you. It's easy to fall off that cliff. I don't want that for my kids and I need to stop this cycle. Like this sh*t stops with me. Whether it be I get okay, or I f*cking turn my lights out.”
It’s this sort of tongue-in-cheek use of concerning language that keeps Iero’s fanbase enthralled, yet somewhat on edge. Take for example, in the comment section for his video “Young & Doomed,” some diehard fans are troubled by his repeated use of the words “hurt myself again.” While he’s surprised to hear about the response, he counters that the record is ultimately meant to feel uplifting and positive, even if addressing dark topics.
“I don't think that we should strive for perfection,” Iero says. “This idea that we should all have this perfect life and be pretty and purse our lips to post a picture on social media is bullsh*t. The things that make us unique are important.”
He continues: “Sometimes we're our own worst enemies and we hurt ourselves. Those scars, though, are important. They're beautiful. ‘Young And Doomed’ is a call to arms to celebrate the things people think are wrong with us.”
Now, Iero just hopes his story and music inspire fans to try, fail and try again.
“You don't find out who you are unless you get a scar and get hurt,” Iero says. “You should be hurt, hurt other people, and learn that it feels terrible to hurt someone else. You should feel sorry for it and make amends for it. These are important lessons to be a better person. You find out who you truly are by attacking things that scare you the most.”
Frank Iero is currently touring Europe with Laura Jane Grace & The Devouring Mothers.
#frank iero#august 2019#forbes#audrey lew#red eagle shirt#all blue#october 2019#bus crash#navy blue tiger windbreaker
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Why think Sarada have 3 tomoe in manga but not anime? She have 1 in anime.
Heyo!
So, I’m glad that you sent me this ask for a number of reasons, but the primary reason is that it gives me an excuse to go on a tangent about Sarada’s Sharingan and the light novels. I will, however, answer your question first before I actually go on my tangent, out of respect for the ask. But, if you are interested, buckle up cause it’s gonna be a long one!
Okay, so, the anime and the manga are very far apart in terms of where they are in the story. While the anime is slowly catching up and is finally moving into the Kara arc, it is still way behind in comparison to the manga. The manga favors the main story line and doesn’t like to diverge into more detailed territory, instead relying on the anime and the light novels to supplement the story, provide the missing details, develop the characters, and expand on the off-screen activities of the characters. There are also a couple of one-shots out there by Kishimoto-Sensei, particularly one about Mitsuki that is amazing, that do this, as well. In the manga, they don’t discuss how and when Sarada acquired her 3 tomoe- which really bums me out- and they haven’t talked about it in the anime yet either. They also didn’t bother to show or explain how/ when Sarada trained with Sasuke to learn the Chidori. They just kinda threw it in there with little explanation, hoping that the fans would know to turn to other mediums, such as the light novels, for further clarification. I do not expect the manga to tell us about Sarada getting her 3 tomoe and it seems to me like they’re just retconning it into the story to keep the plot moving and hoping fans will just accept it as is. As I said, the anime is behind on the story, however, I do expect the anime to dive into Sarada gaining her 3 tomoe Sharingan in place of the manga, so I urge you to stay tuned for that.
Put simply, just by going off the manga alone, there really is no explanation as to how Sarada got her 3 tomoe and the anime isn’t caught up enough to explain it either. And this is where I tell you not to rely on the manga alone for the full story. The light novels are canon material, too, and they are a great place to start- if you can find them- to get more of the story than you would from the manga or even the anime. Particularly look into the Sasuke Sunrise light novel, the Parent and Child light novel, and the Sasuke Shinden light novel: The Teacher’s Star Pupil. Hopefully, that answers your question.
And, now, I’m gonna go on my tangent. We’re not gonna be given a direct explanation of Sarada getting her 3 tomoe in the manga. They’re gonna shove that off into the light novels and the anime, which I find completely disappointing because it would be great to see that development of her character in the manga, especially to see how the creators handle it. HOWEVER, I believe, 100%, that the manga will show us Sarada getting her Mangekyou Sharingan at the very least and it’s gonna be a major part of the story. I know other people think that she will get her Mangekyou Sharingan from Sasuke’s or Naruto’s deaths and I can see that as, maybe, a possibility considering the apparent direction the manga is going in and that they said it was gonna take on a darker tone, but I don’t agree with those predictions. I don’t think either of them are going to die anytime soon, if at all.
Sarada’s Sharingan awakened from love, not loss or hatred. It awakened out of her love for her parents (mostly Sasuke) and nothing anyone says will convince me otherwise. I honestly think that Sarada’s Mangekyou Sharingan will awaken out of her selfless love for someone she deeply cares about. Whether that turns out to be Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura, Cho-Cho, Mitsuki, Kawaki, or Boruto is yet to be seen, although I do think it will be someone other than Sasuke and Sakura and I will explain my reasoning later. With that being said, I think it will awaken in one of three ways: either Sarada is going to be gravely injured protecting someone and realizing that she was so willing to do so out of her love for that person, someone she loves will be gravely injured in her presence or to protect her, and she will awaken the Mangekyou Sharingan out of pure love and desire to save/ protect that person, or the Village will be almost entirely destroyed in Pain-like fashion if the fight manages to spill back over into the Village and upon seeing the destruction her love and devotion to the Village, her devotion to the Will of Fire, will awaken the Mangekyou Sharingan. I also have a theory/ prediction of how her Mangekyou may awaken based on how the manga is laying things out, but I’ll explain that later, too.
To me, it doesn’t make sense to have the Mangekyou awaken out of loss due to the fact that it has long been established as being driven by her love. Sarada isn’t like the other Uchiha when it comes to her Sharingan. She isn’t bound by the Curse of Hatred and as such it has no effect on her Sharingan’s abilities. One of the light novels delves into this in a conversation between Sasuke and Sakura in which they talk about how caring and sensitive Sarada is, how observant and curious she is, and how she loves deeply. I don’t think you can suddenly change that facet of her because it is an important part of her personality which distinguishes her from the Uchiha before her in a way that breaks away from the established norm and defines her as her own person. You certainly can’t change that just so she can level up in a “believable way,” because that isn’t believable at all based on how her character has been established. For example, if they were to have Kawaki, in particular, kill Sasuke or Naruto or Sakura and Sarada was to hate him for it, thus introducing the Curse of Hatred to her, I think it would completely diminish her character by devaluing the fact that her growth is based on love, not hate. Of course, you could argue that she could develop from learning to forgive him for doing something like that and moving past the hate, but the relationship between Kawaki and Sarada isn’t built up enough to make that believable on top of the fact that Sarada isn’t a character who hates anyone in particular and suddenly putting that on her just to establish that she is someone who can overcome hate for love would literally be far too similar to Sasuke’s story and that’s not how this series is doing things. Sarada being a character devoid of hate and full of love is literally what sets her apart from the Uchiha before her, as I said, and introducing loss and hatred as a way to awaken her Mangekyou just doesn’t make any sense to me and seems like a complete and total retcon.
The Boruto series, according to Ikemoto-Sensei, is about the kids breaking away from inherent families bonds. It’s about them making their own way in life and not defining themselves based on the families they come from. They choose their own paths, create their own destinies, and are not defined by their inherited traits. Sarada, for example, is not defined by the Uchiha history. She isn’t bound by the Curse of Hatred like Sasuke was and like the overwhelming majority of the other Uchiha were- I give exception to Itachi here, in particular. She has fully embraced the Will of Fire and the connections that she has to others and her desire to become Hokage shows that. She is taking a different path from her family and making her mark in her own way. Boruto, likewise, is taking a different path from his family, too. While he tried desperately to gain Naruto’s recognition, he never wanted to be defined as the son of the Hokage. He wanted to be his own person and break away from the idea that he, like his father and grandfather before him, would become Hokage, which is why he admires Sasuke so much and wants to follow in his footsteps. In Kishimoto-Sensei’s Mitsuki story, we see him also work to establish his own path in life. None of them want to follow in their families footsteps and that’s an important aspect of the series to consider when you look at things like Sarada’s Sharingan.
Now, going back to what I said earlier, I don’t think Sarada will awaken her Mangekyou because of her love for her parents. I think we’ve reached a point in the series where it’s time for her love to be displayed towards someone else in the same way that it extends to her parents. We have seen her love for Sasuke (and Sakura) awakening her Sharingan and based on what I’ve read in the light novels, it develops further due to her love for Sasuke. And now I think we’re at a point in her development where her love for others needs to be displayed to further her development and put her on the path of understanding the importance of her connections to those around her and what that means for herself, as Naruto did. And I compare her to Naruto here in that to become Hokage, she needs to be recognized by the Village, as Naruto did before her. She needs to understand her connections to people outside of her family to truly recognize the importance of those connections in order to harness the desire to become strong enough to maintain those connections and to fight to protect everyone. If she doesn’t do so and show everyone in the Village that she has what it takes to protect them and bring them together, then she will never become Hokage. Just having the desire to do so isn’t enough. And that’s why I think her Mangekyou will awaken because of someone outside of her family. I honestly think her Mangekyou will awaken from love towards Naruto or Boruto. I say towards Naruto because we know the lengths he will go to protect the Village and if the fight returns to the Village, he is willing to risk everything to protect it, and if Sarada were to witness this it may awaken her Mangekyou in her love and admiration of Naruto as Hokage and her desire to want to help him and protect the Village. Now, that’s just a vague, rather un-thought-out idea that I’m not entirely committed to, but I could see it happening. Then, there is the possibility that it will awaken because of her love for Boruto and this is where my theory/ prediction based on how the manga is going comes into play.
So, remember way back when Sumire asked Sarada if she was bothered by other girls liking Boruto, if she liked Boruto herself, and Sumire admitting that she likes Boruto? Then Sarada gives her this weird look when they leave after denying she had feelings for Boruto and that she didn’t really care if other girls liked him? I think that’s setting us up to see Sarada realize that she does have feelings for Boruto. Now, remember when Boruto asked Sasuke to borrow his headband before the fight? Also, remember when Sasuke told Boruto that he and Naruto are willing to do anything, even die, to protect the Village? All of those things tie into my theory. Here’s how I think it’d play out: Sasuke and Naruto are beaten up pretty badly and are incapacitated, leaving Boruto the last one standing and unable to stop Jigen from returning to the Village. Jigen starts destroying the Village to find Kawaki and easily fights off everyone in his way before Boruto also returns to the Village to try and stop him, at the behest of Sasuke. Sarada’s still in the hospital, of course, but can hear what’s going on and decides that she’s gonna join the fight despite her injuries. At this point, you’ve got just about everyone mobilized to stop Jigen, which I think will lead to some character deaths that will also be important to the story. So, Jigen is stomping people left and right just as Sarada joins in the fight. Boruto, Sarada, and Mitsuki go all gung-ho and use their strongest abilities, including Sage Mode for Mitsuki (yay), and while they manage to injure Jigen, they’re nowhere near strong enough to stop him, especially because they are all injured at this point. Jigen’s getting ready to take them all out and either Boruto will get seriously injured protecting Sarada or vice versa, causing Sarada’s Mangekyou to awaken because of her desire to protect him, and I think she’ll later realize it’s because of deep feelings for Boruto that it awakens. Now, either Sarada is going to take full advantage of her new abilities and completely wreck Jigen or Boruto’s gonna go bananas and inflict some heavy damage on him- which might include Momoshiki-Boruto making another appearance. Then, you have Kawaki who can also hear what’s happening, escapes, and joins the fight and says that he’ll go with Jigen if he’ll stop attacking the Village and stop hurting his friends. Jigen agrees and as they’re leaving, Boruto tries to stop him and Kawaki retaliates, giving him his scar.
That’s my prediction of how things are gonna unfold and I’m willing to bet money that at least some of that happens, whether how I described it or not is yet to be seen, as I think the manga is leading up to it. But I also think this is the point where Sarada is going to awaken her Mangekyou Sharingan because it is definitely going to be the most emotional point of the story thus far and is a prime opportunity to have it awaken. And they better not waste this opportunity.
Anyway, if you’ve made it this far, thank you for bearing with me and reading and thank you, anon, for the ask! I hope this all makes sense to everyone and you’re all as hype as I am for the coming chapters/ episodes!
#thank you for coming to my TED talk#I hope you enjoyed the show#but seriously though thank you for the ask anon#I've been waiting for an opportunity to go on a tangent about Sarada's Mangekyou Sharingan#I truly think she'll have it before the supposed time skip that's coming up#ask#anon#Boruto#Boruto: Naruto Next Generations#Sarada#Mitsuki#Sasuke#Sakura#Naruto#Jigen#Kawaki#Uchiha clan#Sarada Uchiha#Sasuke Uchiha#Boruto Uzumaki#Naruto Uzumaki#Sakura Uchiha#Sakura Haruno#Uchiha Sarada#Otsutsuki#manga predictions
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I WATCHED 10.22. HERE ARE SOME THOUGHTS UNDER THE CUT. i promise they won’t all be in full caps, but i feel i should also warn you that this was not proofread.
the episode is starting! it has started. the start has started.
lots of flashbacks from 10.21 with VERY dramatic music in the background and it’s very much working on me. EMOTIONS.
oh my gosh we’re now getting a flashback (a new one, not “previously on”) to wo fat and victor hesse planning some evil shit with daiyu mei serving them tea and it is EVEN MORE DRAMATIC than the previously on was. i am IMPRESSED. also maybe laughing a little bit, but in a way where i’m genuinely enjoying the extreme “LOOK, THIS IS BAD” of it, gosh.
fun way to remind us of how it all started, with these two planning anton’s extraction! they get to show us bits and pieces from the pilot while we still get something new.
wo fat: “blood. is blood.” hmmm, the show seems to want us to think he has a point but i’m mostly amused this is coming from the ultimate bad guy because yes, that seems about right. (hashtag you don’t owe people anything just because you’re related to them, shuddup.)
daiyu mei looks all shy and awkward when wo fat asks for her input but i’ve decided that’s an act to keep victor underestimating her.
steve and cole are in a car and fjdkfdjk wait catherine is a super code breaker now? idk, she may have displayed some skills that leaned that way in the past, but now she’s suddenly well-known as one of the best in that field even though that’s not even her field as far as we know? i. i don’t mind catherine getting brought up in conversation but this is such an odd way to do it.
“we were together for a buncha years” hahaha, fandom never really knows how to define the start and end of their relationship and it seems steve doesn’t, either.
“she was the one that got away. what’re you gonna do?” well, look sad and frowny while this guy you barely know throws you a somewhat awkward look because you’re suddenly baring your heart to him, apparently! (for real though, i get that people will be upset at this phrasing and i’m sort of thinking this is a lead in to things i won’t like at the end of the episode and that’s bad but for what it’s worth, i don’t mind this at all! she did slip away from him at a time where he thought they were going somewhere else and he’s talking in past tense now.)
cole is worried he ruined steve’s day by bringing up catherine and that’s sweet, actually! seals emotionally supporting seals.
OOF it is TIME for danny to get ABDUCTED. also: i love that steve immediately drops everything, including the very important super secret difficult to arrange meeting to maybe finally get some insight into this cipher that doris left him, to race to wherever danny is in his car. i feel like alerting hpd (or anyone else in five-0 who might be closer) would be a good idea, but it makes a lot of sense for steve to need to Be There himself.
ohhhhh steve continually nearly crashing his truck while yelling for danny but only hearing gunshots over the line is 👌👌👌. THE ANGST. THE TENSION. very good, very good.
the camaro is BURNING. well that’s one way to smack us in the face with the end of an era, damn.
steve is ALSO BURNING because he obviously tried to get inside the car ahhhh.
fjdkf steve calls tani with instruction about cameras and tani asks if everything is okay because he sounds upset and all he says is “danny’s been taken” and that’s how tani an junior find out, poor dears.
steve, instructing hpd: “we’re looking for detective danny williams. you know who he is, my partner, right? we’re looking for him.” YOU KNOW WHO HE IS. MY PARTNER.
steve is already out of breath from sheer stress and he’s just standing around the tech table with the team, my gosh. (I LOVE THIS.)
danny, bloody and chained up and facing his captor, a woman he already knows is very, very dangerous: [makes a joke about exchanging insurance information because they burned his car] (LOVE HIM TOO.)
OOF though, daiyu mei lets danny know she knows he has two kids and the jokes are over because that’s definitely the line with danny, god.
here’s the scene from the one preview clip i watched! i’m really enjoying daiyu mei, by the way. she’s still a totally bonkers way to bring the threat of wo fat back even after he’s dead, but she is genuinely threatening.
“i have the person you care about most in the world” hello yes i’m still yelling about that one and might not stop soon
daiyu mei telling steve not to make the same mistake he did with his father and “allow a loved one to die” is so mean but so good and narratively pretty darn cool.
we’re not even eleven minutes in and we’re already at “come alone, commander, or your friend dies”. [insert that escalated quickly meme]
steve thinks he has zero options except give in to exactly what daiyu mei wants and it’s very unsteve of him but also fits perfectly with the mindset they’ve maneouvred him into over the past few episodes and with DANNY BEING GONE so i like it. i like that steve is very obviously freaking the fuck out.
never though i would say this, but... steve, you should listen to adam. it’s shocking, especially this season, but he is making an actual good judgment.
steve alone in the elevator on the verge of either a panic attack or breaking down crying and curling up into a ball is A LOT.
steve goes to the meeting alone, gets a location and confirmation that danny is alive and then hands over the cipher, and that’s good but also... i mean, for real, if he had just printed some random symbols on a similar piece of paper (maybe even the same symbols but in a different order!) how on earth would daiyu mei have known?
OH. OHHHH. danny does the badass steve-ish thing where he pulls himself up by his shackles to somehow get himself free, holy fuck, yes man.
IT WORKS. knocked out the guard, got the keys, got a gun - damn son. not only do we get worried out of his mind steve, we ALSO get bamf danny, ahhhh.
AND THEN HE GETS SHOT IN THE SHOULDER, which is where all those promo pictures came from obviously, and also means we’re about to tick off the hurt part of h/c in an even bolder font than we already had.
fdjkfdjkfd steve’s litany of comforting little nonsense lines while he’s dragging danny to the car and getting him into it and NOT GETTING BEHIND THE WHEEL BUT STAYING WITH DANNY IN THE BACK is killing me slowly.
fdjkfd steve hugging danny’s bloody face in his lap oh my god
apparently that wasn’t GOOD ENOUGH YET because then they’re at the hospital and steve tells the doctor’s what’s up and they’re about to roll danny away and danny, half dead and according to steve in and out of consciousness, somehow finds the time to try to grAB AT STEVE’S ARM BLINDLY. steve: “hey, i’m with you buddy, it’s okay.” DEAD. NOT DANNY, ME. I AM VERY DEAD.
the entire team is stressed and worried and just dead quiet, watching danny and steve. ohhhh boy.
oh fuck oh fuck steve is praying and red-eyed and furious and telling god “you wanna take somebody? take me. not him, you take me.” and i have a very big massive weak spot for exactly this.
cole comes to find steve to offer to figure out the cipher thing and steve has a very hard time giving a single flying shit and then HANDS COLE HIS GUN. welllll. just letting go of stuff they never would have normally left and right, here. i was kind of expecting steve’s badge to follow.
tani has a lot of good worried moments and i love that.
danny is out of surgery!!! steve gets to see him!!!
oh GOD we get a sad version of all for one while steve is in danny’s hospital room and grabs danny’s hand and i am. oh. oh. not okay.
STILL ONLY JUST PAST THE HALFWAY POINT OF THE EPISODE.
it’s honestly kind of weird that cole has this much screentime (i know he was supposed to be back for the season 11 that will never happen, but with the way things turned out that’s not very relevant anymore in story), but i mind it less than i thought i would have. i like him, and i’m glad he has quinn with him now, because i always want more of her.
danny wakes up and his slightly loopy conversation with steve has me fjdkfdjkfd. d: [says you’re supposed to be happy when a patient wakes up] s, like he might still be about to cry: “i’m happy.” d: “yeah? yeah, me too.”
steve is hurting and blaming himself for everything (very in character) and danny tells him he’s already annoying and that if he had a dollar for every time steve saved his life he’d have like twenty bucks (also very in character) and i’m glad for that bit of comic relief and they need it, too, but somebody also needs to give steve a good shake until the thought that this is on him leaves his head. if anyone except daiyu mei is responsible here, it’s doris. blame doris, jfc.
danny, after nearly dying and only just waking up in the hospital, while he still has trouble speaking: “put [the call steve is getting] on speaker, would you, i’m bored.” more jokes! but it also makes me go fjdkfdjk because you will not convince me that this is not danny, extremely injured, still trying to take care of steve by distracting him from all the misery they’re in.
fjdkfd OKAY SO. plot stuff: the cipher translates to coordinates that apparently lead to the place where the mcgarretts thought doris was buried. steve says he knows the place because his dad used to take him there and ? because i always thought john sent his kids away pretty soon after doris died so he can’t have had much time to visit her grave a lot with them, but also just, the drama of it, wow, doris. send your son an encrypted message that sends him to your fake grave, why don’t you.
jfkdsjlfksljfds the mcgarretts have a family mausoleum now, apparently, omfg. and there was still a space with doris’s name on it? even though they’ve known for how many years by now that she was still alive oh my gosh
cole is along for the ride to doris’s fake grave and steve keeps dropping these little nuggets from his family history and cole keeps (rightfully!) looking a little confused and/or alarmed, poor guy, hahaha.
daiyu mei is running full tilt and doing some mad parcour shit in a suit and what looks like high heels and there is a whole action scene here with lots of players and constant shooting and some one-on-one fighting, but i am fully distracted by the shoewear.
oh, false alarm, probably! not quite high heels, just something ballarina like with a very tiny heel. that’s better.
fjdkfjdkfd OOF daiyu mei nearly kills steve, steve gets the upper hand, daiyu mei says some things and we’re given another flashback to wo fat and victor hesse and this time also john when he was held hostage, and suddenly we’re told he’s not surprised that doris had a secret son (wo fat) and that he suspected her death was staged.
OH MY GU==fdj
okay so those were typos but i’m LEAVING THEM because “whatever happens next, don’t tell my son. it would be too hard on him.” HELLO JOHN, FUCK YOU JOHN. he wanted??? to keep this secret??? from steve??? and also he doesn’t even acknowledge that he maybe has more than just a son. maybe there is a person called mary out there somewhere? might ring a bell, if you think about it long and hard.
wo fat: “you’re a good man, john mcgarrett.” i really don’t know if we’re supposed to agree with things wo fat says but he’s mostly voicing the opposite of what i feel this episode.
daiyu mei to steve: “you are your father.” oh gosh. oh no.
ahh, here’s a point where cole’s presence really starts to take away from other characters. he shows up to steve and daiyu mei’s confrontation to back steve up, and that obviously should have been any other character that we’ve known for way longer and have way more attachment to (junior! that would have been so good, or maybe lou, who’s also been here for seven years, or tani, who keeps worrying), especially, very very much especially when steve goes “book her, cole”. that’s just confusing, too. so far the cole and steve parallels have been thrown at us and now he’s suddenly in danny’s place.
32 minutes out of 42 and we’re at “one week later” and steve hopping through his garden to get to the beach chairs where danny is sitting. this is good but worrying for how early it comes.
danny says he misses the very nice nurse who brought him jello and steve tells him not to confuse a caregiver for someone who cares and danny goes “yeah? you know jealousy is not uh, pretty on you.” and then they’re both awkwardly quiet for a moment. dear lord.
AND THEN THINGS WENT PEARSHAPED. danny: “you all packed?” my heart is sinking fast. maybe i should just quit here and leave it at danny telling steve jealousy is not pretty on him (which implies other things are pretty on steve - let’s get back to that).
steve to danny, who is talking up hawaii (which is of course very good): “who are you?” i am having FLASHBACKS to junior asking tani that exact same thing just a few episodes ago.
danny seriously questions steve’s decision to just up and leave hawaii a bunch of times and yes, danny, good, grill him. this is a stupid plan.
danny: “you know, it don’t feel like it’s gonna be okay. it feels like- my main dude is leaving me.” HI STEVE. MAYBE DON’T. MAYBE DON’T GO. MAYBE DON’T HURT DANNY.
“you got a phone, right?” we’re seriously at that point. we are. seriously at that point. wow.
steve forces danny to get up to give him the frigging tenderest, dopily smiliest hug and it is so very sweet yet so very wrong.
“I LOVE YOU, MAN.” / “I LOVE YOU TOO.” THEY DID NOT YELL THAT BUT I AM BECAUSE THIS IS ALL I’VE WANTED FOR TWO YEARS and now it’s under these circumstances which ugh BUT I AM STILL HYPED. THEY GOT TO SAY IT AGAIN. GOOD. FUCKING GOOD.
“don’t make me come looking for you” danny says after he sits back down and without another word steve starts walking away and then he stops and looks back and catches danny looking over his shoulder but quickly looking away again and holy fucking damn if this isn’t how stories go when they try to tell us that two characters shouldn’t be parting because they don’t want to. turn around, steve. it’s so easy.
EDDIE. my gosh, ANOTHER blond guy who loves steve to pieces and who steve Should Not Just Leave, wtf.
eddie gets an i love you too and then a kiss and my heart! is having a hard time today!
oh LORD there’s a knock at the door and it’s the whole entire team and lou!!! is making me cry!!! and everyone whispers how much steve means to them at him while they’re hugging him and fjdkfd what. why is he leaving! it’s starting to sound like a worse decision by the second.
i could cry at all of these goodbyes seperately but right now i am also crying at tani immediately hugging noelani when she joins the pile of people who have said goodbye. ohhhh.
EVERYONE IS CRYING. not cool. VERY UNCOOL. also, honestly, i love that danny got to say goodbye seperately and it’s fitting that he just can’t watch steve actually walk out the door but also... he should have been here, gdi. now there’s this huge emotional team moment and he’s absent and it’s weird.
steve boards a plane and sits down and his phone beeps and it’s danny texting him “miss you already” and i cannot believe this is actual canon and had to pause to kind of laugh/gasp for air for a little bit.
and catherine shows up! i’ve been braced for this so i’m not surprised and it’s less bad than i thought in many ways but also. they talk about cath driving danny’s car and steve says they can’t have danny williams driving his own car and if that’s true, then why the hell are you leaving, steve. what are you doing to danny? (also. uh. danny’s car kind of went up in flames? he has a new one already? i. what.)
cath asks if steve is ready and they hold hands and steve turns to look out the plane window and smiles and that’s very suddenly it.
you know what? you know what, for the most part, i absolutely loved this. i was prepared for VERY BAD THINGS and i don’t enjoy steve leaving at the end at all and i have MANY NOTES on how things could have maybe ended even better but i. i am okay with this. i am okay with this! that is honestly more than i thought i would be able to say and i’m just VERY RELIEVED right now.
as for the show ending with steve and cath... that was weird, but... he also held danny’s hand this episode and that was supposedly platonic, and steve and cath did not suddenly have a big romantic kiss or get engaged, so i am choosing to take this as a platonic reunion with a person from steve’s past he still cares about, someone who travels a lot and was in hawaii to break that code and therefore this makes sense. he leaves with cath, and then, in a few weeks’ time, he comes back to danny (the person he cares about most in the world), and canon just, y’know, forgot to mention that little tidbit. it happens.
anyway, i had EMOTIONS and i still need to let all of this sink in and i hope you’re all doing okay after this whirlwind of a thing and ahhhh, it is so very weird that it’s over now. 💖
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