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punkpandapatrixk · 4 months

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🧝🏻‍♀️Mystical Glow-Up Secrets ♦︎ Timeless Pick A Card

Your mystical glow-up is literally divinely ordained, no cap HAHAH I’ve got this vibe from the deck-bottom but let me start with this quote:

'A Humanity that thinks materialistically will produce frightful beings in the future, and a Humanity that thinks spiritual thoughts, will work upon and transform the future organism so that beautiful Human bodies will proceed from it.' – Rudolf Steiner

Oh, gosh.

We are in an era of spiritual consciousness. This is an era where we learn to reflect outwardly what it means to be a 5D-Consciousness Being. Living in a 5D consciousness, people naturally feel lighter, freer, younger, prettier, healthier, more fit, more stress-free, more energetic; all because people's whole vibrations are 'triggered' by a more spiritual ae-nergy.

ae is known as chi or prana or orgone in other languages; by synchronizing with your ae, ever so organically your body learns to derive vital energy from a purer source of consciousness—a high vibration of aetheric authenticity—that reflects in the physical world as a glow-up of the highest divine order~♥︎

As your Mind comes into alignment with the ae of your Spirit, so your Body becomes attuned to that Order. The significance of ae will only grow as more people come into a spiritual kind of liberation from the chains of insecurity propagated by the monsters in the media and politics.

No matter what the propaganda of the moment may say and try to do, you could always be the conscious individual that distils information and derives from this process only the essence of what is good for you on a personal level. If you’re happy, satisfied, confident and proud with your intelligent conscious choices, that spark of contentment is what truly makes a person glow from the inside out~★

education: Body Care and Grooming (1948)

technomagy: Facial Symmetry with Muscle Toning (Energetic Programmed Audio) by Sapien Medicine

deck-bottom: XX Judgement Rx, Silver Historian (Polydore Vergil), Priestess of Beauty

[PAC Masterlist] [Part 1] [Part 3]

[Patreon] [Paid Readings]

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 1 – As You Mend Your Heart, Babe, All of You Gets Beautiful Again

assistance: what is coming is 100000x better than what is gone by doyouflow

what’s been taken from you? – 9 of Wands

Although this is a 9 of Wands card, I see that the entirety of your Pile is water-based. You’re someone whose heart is very pure and kind, and you’ve sacrificed a lot of yourself for being there for others. I’m hearing: ‘for a pessimist I was pretty optimistic, and I got nothing—NOTHING—but betrayal and abandonment, and I am exhausted.’ Being charitable around the wrong fucker can surely drain our spiritual aenergy!

You’ve been through multiple cycles of ‘exhausting’ friendships with people who couldn’t appreciate you for the delicate human that you are. They only saw you as this fiery, strong, charismatic capable individual who always managed to whip up a positive attitude in any circumstances. It never occurred to them—not that they’d care to wonder anyway—that maybe this time around you’re the one needing a hug.

Nobody cared; and even the ones who pretended to care, only wanted to know what your gloominess was all about. And they went on to talk shit behind your back and had a good laugh about it. ‘MU HA HA HA, turns out Y/N ain’t even that shit! Y/N is pretty pathetic/loser/crazy BU HA HA HA HA!!!’ Funny thing is, you always knew about their shit one way or another and the whole revelation broke your heart to pieces. Multiple times with different people… tsk tsk…

recalling fragments of your beauty – 9 of Cups

Well, now, I can see you’ve lost a lot of these ‘friends’ and worked on yourself to create new neural pathways towards a truer sense of spiritual abundance. I’m sure right now your Life is pretty OK in areas like finance and material security; your job or creative project is going swimmingly; you have a pretty good work-life balance; and for the most part you’re really enjoying the peacefulness of your solitary Life.

But if there’s one thing, I think you haven’t had a really good conversation with someone interesting in a pretty long time. I see that your eyes have not twinkled from being complimented by someone genuinely kind in a really long while. You’ve lost a lot of your affection for people and you’ve lost faith in being energetic and social. People always disappoint in the end because their hearts are ugly and they’re mean to each other. This deep-seated belief has caused your eyes to look dead and droopy.

Have you perhaps noticed that you’ve developed a set of sanpaku eyes? The minimalistic science behind it states that people could develop sanpaku eyes after going through a lot—like a FUCKTON—of heartache and disappointments. I think your case could be dealing with some kind of a ‘betrayal trauma’ or some variety of ‘injustice trauma’. Look ‘em up, babe~ ♥︎

sealing the deal with the Divine Feminine – Knight of Cups

If some years have passed now since the last time you were around your fake friends, or even frenemies, I want you to know that your beauty has not been lost to time or ageing. Nope. Not at all. That’s bullshit. I can see that you’re the type of person who ages very UNNATURALLY. If your natal chart has a lot of Water aenergies or you have strong placements in Water Houses, you’re defo the type of bitch that can TRANSFORM your physical appearance by sheer mood ;D At this point, you can’t even age coz that skin barrier is strong AF LMAO

THAT’S WHY! Your true mystical glow-up secret lies in your mending your pretty Heart~ You’ve never had an ugly Heart, obviously, and still now it’s not ugly or anything; but it’s the way you think about how deserving you are of a friendship or relationship that honours your complex sensitivity that needs to be acknowledged and RECLAIMED. Doesn’t matter how, doesn’t matter when or who’s coming next, I just want you to know that if this reading has popped in to your Life… Your Soulmates are coming to get you, bitch. Pack up and play in the sea! XD

The good times that you’re going to be having with your Soulmates, Soul Tribes, Soul Fam—however you may resonate—are going to refill the stars in your Heart, automatically reflected in your eyes~ ★_★v Hahah I promise you that you’re going to reunite with Souls who are very, very old friends with you. You’re going to live a very happy, passionate Life doing things you like with people you Love… How the hell do you think that’s not gonna heal all of you and make everything about you beautiful again?😉

Originally, you’re a beautiful bitch. And if you’ve also got some Capricorn/Saturn/10th House placements, it’s very likely you’re ageing backwards! What the hell even is that?? \`★_★`/

GODDESS OF BEAUTY🔻💙

beauty on the inside – Green Physician (Paracelsus)

beauty on the outside – Priestess of Inspiration

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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 2 – It’s the Passion in Your Heart That Reflects Outwardly Your True Inner Beauty

assistance: I TRUST things aren’t falling apart they are FALLING INTO PLACE by doyouflow

~wah, girl, you really gotta check out the bonus content for this one XP~

what’s been taken from you? – 5 of Cups Rx

Out of all the Piles, you’re the baddest bitch of them all, do you realise that? You’ve got the most unhinged aenergy about you XD You’re a psycho, you know that? You’re generally thought of as either unpredictable or uncontrollable, but you could also be both, unprovoked LMAO People think you’re a problem child, because you’re so gutsy. I’m literally not getting ANYTHING about what’s been taken from you ^_^; Are you sure you still need this PAC? XD

First of all, you literally exist in your own dimension. That’s why people can’t control you. They can’t tame you. You’re a weirdo, a maniac even, who does things your way, plans things according to your vision, and yours alone, for the most part. People think you’re rather selfish but it’s because you’re a girl, right? If you were a man they’d say you’re DRIVEN. And yes! DRIVE that Bentley, bitch! No, DRIVE that Tesla into OUTER SPACE, bitch! You don’t appreciate people telling you what you CAN’T do!

And you don’t like it when people gaslight you about your confidence just because they’re a little bitch. You love being a Supreme Bitch—you’re a girl on a mission; ain’t nobody got the aenergy to listen to nobody’s guilt-tripping. And in that sense, your spirit and psychology have never really been hit by society. Society has never been able to take away anything from you ♡

recalling fragments of your beauty – XIV Temperance Rx

I see that your Beauty has stayed intact for the majority of your Life. It’s not like you’d resonate with having lost fragments of your beauty to years of depression, malnutrition or anything of the sort? Your mindset has remained strong for the majority of your adult Life. You have a strong mentality and this is reflected well in your physical body. A glow-up is easy, as long as you want it. And for the most part, your glow-up is tightly bound to your sense of purpose.

You’ve always known you’re meant for great things. And from a very young age you already worked on your mentality. You REFUSED to be normal, you refused mediocrity. It wasn’t a walk in the park until you reached your conviction though. Your childhood was rather constrictive, either due to societal expectations…or familial expectations. The adults around you thought you didn’t notice but you saw all of these fences put around you, and they pissed you off. Even your peers couldn’t understand what you wanted to make out of yourself.

So you rebelled from a very young age. You were, yes, THEE problem child, only because the small-minded people around you were a problem to your goals! Such hindrance. And now you’re glowing up and grabbing all the money bags and they jealous? Are you even fucking kidding my butt? Your path towards a total glow-up of your mindset and real life was not always perfect, but what’s perfection? All of the struggles play into creating your lore👑

sealing the deal with the Divine Feminine – 2 of Cups

If you’ve never heard anybody tell you this, allow me to be the first. Your drive, your determination, your ambition and motivation, although these qualities may make you appear like a selfish bitch on the outside, I, ME, MYSELF, understand that you want these things not only for yourself. There are people in this world you want to protect and provide for. Maybe it’s your mother who was abused or left by her deadbeat husband, idk. Maybe it’s a sibling or a pet you want to give the best Life for, idk.

Maybe, you want to achieve success and fame and be seen by the world, because you want to save the world from the malady of its own crazy, idk~ You want to be an example, a healing presence, a voice of reason, a voice for the voiceless, idk? You may look a certain bitchy, scary way on the outside, but your heart is good; it’s PURE GOLD. You live for the betterment of someone else and if that’s not LOVE, what is?

What most people don’t understand about you is how your sparkle of beauty literally comes from this desire to protect and provide for someone other than yourself. You have a lot of Love in your heart, even if you don’t always admit it to yourself. Your entire Life, your glow-up has come from your being DRIVEN. Vroom vroom, MOTHERFUCKER .・°☆~ You leave a trail of stardust for your aenemies ♥︎

GODDESS OF BEAUTY🔻💛

beauty on the inside – Green Alchemist (Nicolas Flamel)

beauty on the outside – Priestess of Patience

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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 3 – When Your Existence is Useful to the Healing of Others, Their Love/Gratitude Nurtures You Back to Health

assistance: you get to be universes favorite by doyouflow

what’s been taken from you? – Page of Cups Rx

See, it’s crazy that literally a few mins before starting on you, Pile 3, I came across a quote that says this:

‘Some of us are such advanced Souls that we did not come here to be supported, but we came to be the support system for many. If you’ve had a challenging Life and feel you never had proper support or Love, that is because YOU are the Love and Support.’

Well, my heart broke, but…hey, there’s clarity and validation there😊

All of these cards are in reverse, telling me there’s a lot that’s been taken from you. Your heart, compassion, resources, money, hobby items, OMG, the list is endless! So much has been taken away from you. Either by people borrowing stuff without remembering to return or people getting a favour without returning it to you. At least, even when it seemed like they did return some favour to you…the return was either lacklustre or just…it didn’t feel right?

You’ve felt gaslit too much your entire Life. An incessant feeling of being unseen, unappreciated, unloved, could’ve eaten away at your self-worth. You’ve often been the miracle in someone else’s Life, but when it comes to you needing a transformation in your Life, where’s MY miracle…? I think you could have Chiron in 12th House or Pisces? That kind of placement is one where an individual constantly feels like they’ve been forsaken by God, or the positive forces of the Universe…

recalling fragments of your beauty – 3 of Pentacles Rx

The truth of the matter is, you’ve not been forsaken by your Spirit Guides. See, this message is gonna be especially resonant for you who do have Chiron or Saturn in the 8th or 12th House—that the Universe, your Higher Self and Spirit Guides have given you so little guidance and support, because you’re meant to learn how it feels like to be in the shoes of Humans. See, it’s not to say these Humans do not have support—babe, they CAN’T access the support because they’re BLIND and DEAF AS FUCK.

Humans are so embarrassingly divorced from their own intuition. Even the most religious folks are blind and deaf to actual angelic whispers. In many cases, because their false religions have taught them to worship wrongly and be obedient to evil authority and not question any injustice and wrongdoings. The more blindly religious a person is, the more separated they are from their own Humanity, because now their ears are deaf to empathy.

You came into this world to understand the twists and turns of how it feels like to navigate this crazy Matrix with so little guidance, so that one day, when you’re propelled into your main mission, you can remind and even teach people how to re-connect with Love—the true source of all compassion and Divinity in Human Form. When you remind people of their Humanity, you regain, and grow exponentially in Beauty ♥︎

sealing the deal with the Divine Feminine – 6 of Pentacles Rx

So, as you can see, you have a very important spiritual mission in this incarnation. I do not give a goddamn dime what you think you look like; whether or not you‘re conventionally attractive; whether or not you fit some bullshit beauty standards; YOU ARE FUCKING BEAUTIFUL when you’re seen sharing your healing gifts with the world! You do remember that a lot of historians say Cleopatra wasn’t perceived as necessarily that conventionally beautiful by most people, right? But that everybody was charmed by her intelligence and charisma when talking about politics?

Yeah, you give me that vibe, bitch <3 That the essence of what you do to alleviate sorrow in the world, when seen by others, when people listen to what you say, when what you do or write changes people’s lives for the better, when people feel motivated by your sheer aenergy to improve themselves—it’s that kinda shit what will help you regain your natural beauty, or manifest a glow-up ☆

When you engage in your Life’s main mission, it’s people’s Love for what you do and the Gratitude they feel for what it’s done in their lives what will aenergetically nurture you back to health. In a nutshell, people’s appreciation for your Life’s Work IS your support system in this world—later on in Life maybe if you haven’t started. It is your Purpose to be useful to the healing of others~ You’re defo gonna have an audience \^_^v Namaste, bitches~★ I honour all that you’ve been through and all that you’re going to do for this world~ You’re so LOVED!!! <3

GODDESS OF BEAUTY🔻🧡

beauty on the inside – Gold Historian (Raphael Holinshed)

beauty on the outside – Priestess of Love

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

[PAC Masterlist] [Part 1] [Part 3]

[Patreon] [Paid Readings]

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just-jordie-things · 8 months

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cherry blossom - inumaki toge

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ 10k follower event special! ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

word count: 9.3k warnings: shibuya mentions, toge says some words bc i'm not god ok, drinking summary: you've always had all the time in the world to figure out what you were to each other. falling in love is meant to be slow and sweet, after all. more info: friends to lovers, fluff without plot really (yeah i'm making that a thing)

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[ what you don’t tell no one, you can tell me // little ghost, tall, tan like milk and honey // you’re very brave, and very free ]

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

Inumaki Toge was very close with all of his friends. He cherished them in ways he could only dream of vocalizing. Instead, with his cursed speech, he was limited to smaller forms of appreciation to show them how he cared. Remembering Yuuta’s favorite drink, punching Maki on the shoulder to tell her she did a great job, passing notes with Panda to pull off a silly prank- his love language was an odd one for sure, but it never went unnoticed. His friends cared for him just as much.

(y/n) was different, though.

It was no secret to the others- if it had been, it would’ve been a terribly kept one- even without the ability to voice it, it would have been useless to try. There was no denying the way that he treated her, the way he looked at her, it was unlike all the others. If she was speaking, his attention was on her, even in a crowded room, even if someone was talking over her, Toge listened to every word, actively engaged in whatever the topic was.

He always sat next to her, always picked her as a training partner, always reached out to her first when making a plan, she lived on the front of his mind rent free, and Toge was more than content to let her.

“Funny, or sad?” She asks him now, drawing him out of his dreamy thoughts and bringing him back to reality. She’s perched at the end of his bed, two dvd cases in either hand presented to him. His gaze shifts between the two as he mulls it over.

If he chooses funny, then he’ll get to hear her giggles for the next two hours, followed by her pretty voice repeating all her favorite lines to send her into fits of laughter again. He likes that option.

But the other movie in her hand is a favorite of hers. He wouldn’t describe it as sad as she had, but the uplifting message did tug at the heartstrings, and he’s caught her crying over it multiple times in the few years he’s known her. So he gestures to that one, reveling in the way she lights up before she’s getting off the bed in order to get his dvd player setup.

It was actually her dvd player, Toge was more of a Netflix guy, but with her collection of movies and the frequency at which she hauled it all over to his room, they’d silently decided to just leave it in his room. Sure, it might have been easier for them to have movie nights in her room where she didn’t have to unplug the Xbox every time to watch a movie, but Toge would never suggest such a thing, and she’s never brought it up either. He likes having some of her things in his room.

For a little while, it could help him feel like they were living a more domestic, normalized life. Sometimes, he would set up her movies from that week on his shelf in alphabetical order, or fold up the blanket she’d left behind, and he could pretend that things were… different.

“I’ll have to add a box of tissues to the pile” She says, eyeing the plastic bag of snacks that the two of them had just gone out for.

It was routine at this point, rush out to the convenience store, buy more snacks than they agreed on, and then rush back to campus to get the movie started before it was too late. These were his favorite days.

With her back turned as she got the dvd player plugged in, Toge clicked his tongue to get her attention. She glances back at him right away, her curious look blooming into a full, beautiful smile as he raises a little plastic package of tissues, wiggling it in the air happily.

“You’re perfect!” She laughs to herself before going back to the console, placing the disk inside with an eager little dance.

Toge thinks it’s adorable that she’s so excited to watch a movie that will make her cry. He could be biased though- he thinks everything she does is adorable.

Once the movie starts, she’s quick to jump back onto the bed, crawling up into the space beside him, snatching up the back of treats on the way. Toge watches her, it’s only the opening credits playing anyways, it’s not like he was missing anything yet. (y/n) catches his eye, raising a brow as she tilts the bag towards him.

There’s not exactly a way for him to tell her that his staring was just because he liked when she didn’t tuck her hair back and it fell in that messy way it did, not because he was waiting for his turn with the snack bag. So he gives her a lopsided smile and takes the offering.

“If you open the chips I want some” (y/n) hums, her eyes already back on the screen as the movie begins. Toge chuckles, pulling out the green bag of sour cream and onion flavored chips, even though he’d been eyeing the package of chocolate chip cookies.

(y/n) turns to him again, this time with a mock pout on her lips.

“Are you laughing at me?”

It makes him laugh a little more, even as he’s shaking his head to convince her otherwise. He opens the bag of chips and tilts it towards her as a peace offering. She gladly accepts it, her frown melting back into her syrupy smile as she snatches a few chips and settles in again to watch the movie.

As expected, she’s tearing up before anything’s really happened yet. Toge knows she’s already thinking about the real tear-jerking moments later on. Her emotions sometimes overwhelmed her- not just when watching heartwarming movies, but with handling the everyday things that came with the life of a jujutsu sorcerer. It was hard when one of her closest friends was sent away on long assignments overseas, it was hard when there were casualties on assignments, it was hard training every day and trying to be better, all the while doubting herself and her abilities.

There were some times that she’d come by and they wouldn’t lounge around watching movies. Sometimes she’d visit him just to sit quietly and take in the comfort of his presence. Toge never minded these days. He was just relieved that there was some way he could help her feel better- although he didn’t always understand what it was that worked. It’s not like he could talk her down from the bad feelings, all he really did was sit there, maybe hold her hand if she needed, often listening to whatever was on her mind.

“He’s the one that makes me think of you” (y/n) points to the screen when a new character pops up. A teenager, with shaggy, jet black hair, and a perpetual frown on his face as he’s on screen.

Toge mirrors the frown, turning to (y/n) with furrowed brows as he awaited a proper explanation. She only giggles to herself as she continues munching on her snack, not bothering to explain how a character who looks and behaves nothing like him could possibly have her making a connection between the two.

He started to wonder if it was time to change his hair again, but as the movie progressed, he began to understand. The kid had taken a vow of silence, and hadn’t spoken a word the entire movie. Yet somehow, his thoughts and feelings were portrayed perfectly. As the viewer, Toge was never left wondering what was going through his head. Admittedly, he grew attached to this character quickly, and he found his focus latching onto the plot now with fervor.

Noticing this, (y/n) smiled to herself as she tucked herself further into the pile of pillows behind her. It always warmed her heart to see him take interest in the things she liked. Maybe even too much.

It’s mostly quiet between them as the movie continues, they don’t like to talk too much during movies, only comments deemed important enough to share before the end, or the ask to pass the snacks. They usually would have a discussion at the end anyways, sharing all of their thoughts and favorite parts with one another.

Soon enough the couple hours passed, the snacks were mostly deplenished, and (y/n) was half asleep, eagerly asking him how he liked the movie despite the tears in her eyes that she was still wiping away with the half-used supply of tissues.

He nods back at her, chuckling softly at the sight of her still being so teary eyed when the movie had ended ten minutes ago. Her lip is still wobbly and even as she folds and re-folds the tissue to keep wiping away the trail of tears.

Toge maneuvers onto his side, facing her with a small smile before taking the tissue from her hands.

“Mustard leaf” He says quietly, before reaching back out and drying up the trail of tears that she’d missed, down her cheek, and then along her jaw. She sniffles between a watery giggle.

“Thank you,” Her voice cracks, and she laughs quietly again. “That movie is just too much sometimes,” She explains, and Toge hums in understanding. This wasn’t nearly as bad when they watched Wall-E. “But I love it, what did you think?”

“Salmon roe” He replies with a larger beam, which she mirrors right away, before her head feels a little heavier on his pillow.

“Okay, good,” She murmurs before a yawn overtakes her, and Toge’s eyes widen in realization when she tucks the blanket over her shoulders. She’s going to fall asleep. He starts to move to shake her awake, one hand curling around her shoulder and tugging slightly, but she doesn’t respond to his silent pleas telling her to get up. “I’m really glad you liked it, you can pick the movie next time though”

Toge huffs when she shuts her eyes and nuzzles into the pillow again. It’s no use. She’s already drifting off right in front of him.

“Bonito flakes” He mutters.

“It’s alright,” (y/n) yawns again. “Just wake me up in, like, twenty minutes and I’ll go back to my room so we don’t get in trouble”

Toge already knows how that’s going to go, but she’s out like a light mere seconds later. He hasn’t seen anyone fall asleep so quickly.

With another sigh, he turns off the tv and places the remainder of the tissue package on his nightstand along with the remote. It doesn’t take him long to fall asleep on his back beside her, even when his brain is working overtime trying not to hyperfixate on her leg pressed against his, or her soft breaths fanning over his shoulder as she sleeps.

His dreams are pleasant, with soft swirls of warm colors, sweet sensations of gentle touches and the lingering scent of cherries and vanilla, melodious giggles and whispers made of but sugar coated words. The kind of dreams that you wake up from and wish there were just a few more minutes to latch onto the remnants of the hazy feeling.

As expected, (y/n’s) still there when he wakes up the following morning- not that he’d tried all too hard to send her back to her own room last night. He just couldn’t bear to disrupt her peaceful sleep beyond a few whispers of her name and pokes to her forehead.

She’s awake not long after him, but she settles back into the covers, murmuring a raspy good morning to him. SHe doesn’t seem startled by the surprise sleepover in the slightest, and the nerves Toge had let fester the last ten minutes of sitting awake and waiting for her to wake up.

There were still a few minutes of her being in and out of sleep, but after a while she’s stretching and getting herself out of bed with the promise of grabbing them both pop tarts before they had to start training for the day.

Toge perks up at the prospect of pop tarts, and she giggles at his obvious change in demeanor, before telling him she’ll be quick, and taking off from his room.

He knows he should be rushing around to get ready for the day, but he can’t bring himself to get up from the bed just yet. It’s too warm, too comfortable, too alluring with the lingering scent of cherry vanilla still clinging to the sheets.

His heart feels full as he settles back in for just a few more minutes.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

(y/n) felt love for all of her friends. She always sort of had, it developed not long after meeting each and every one of them. She loved Maki’s ambition, Panda’s humor, Yuuta’s passion, each and every one of them were simultaneously the greatest person she’s ever known. Her friends were her livelihood, her reason for fighting, her reason for trying, she doesn’t think she’d ever be able to repay them for what they’ve done for her. The love she held for them was the purest kind there was.

The love she held for Inumaki Toge was different, though.

She loved Toge the way she loved late spring, with the way the pretty pink cherry blossoms begin to bloom, and the cool breeze turns warm, and suddenly everything doesn’t seem so gloomy and bitter all the time. The sun seems to shine a little brighter and everyone seems to feel a little brighter, too. It was exactly how loving Toge felt.

It was no secret to the others- if it had been, it would’ve been a terribly kept one, seeing as she could barely unglue herself from his side at any time. If he entered a room, she would rush towards him. If he came back from an assignment with an injury- no matter if it was life threatening or just a paper thin slice, she was patching him up with the utmost care Shoko’s infirmary could offer. If Toge wasn’t around, she was texting him everything that was going on to keep him in touch.

There was nothing that brought her peace and joy quite like being around Toge.

She giggles as she tips her cup against her lips, sipping at the remnants of the drink she’d made only fifteen minutes ago. Yuuta was sure to scold her when she wandered her way into the kitchen for the third time in an hour.

Toge’s laughter follows shortly after hers, although he’s not sure what exactly they’re giggling about, he just can’t help himself once she gets going.

His brows pinch together when he shakes his head, trying to ask her what it is that made her giggle fit erupt in the first place. Once she’s calmed down enough to realize this, she grabs him by the shoulder.

At first his expression morphs into surprise, his eyes wide as he stares at her closely, before she’s swiveling him suddenly, guiding his eyes to the sight that was cracking her up.

Panda was in the common room, clearly feeling himself as he danced about, all slow twirls and raised arms. He looks positively ethereal- in that loaded sort of way.

He’s quick to pull out his phone, setting his cup down to use both hands to steady the camera on Panda’s drunken ballet- or, attempt at ballet. (y/n’s) giggling from beside him would definitely be caught in the video later, but neither of them minded, it only added to the humor of it all.

Maki must’ve noticed what they were up to, as she sneakily made her way over to the pill-shaped speaker, where she turned the volume up a few more notches. This only excited Panda, who picked up the pace in his dancing. (y/n) has to smack a hand over her mouth to stifle the cackle that erupts from her throat, but Toge doesn’t match her haste, and his laughter is almost louder than the music itself.

With a gentle smack to his shoulder, (y/n) shoots him a warning look, silently telling him to quiet down before Panda notices their recording.

Of course, Panda’s already noticed, his paws on his hips as he gawks at his so-called friends who were just making fun of him with their less than subtle camera pointed in his direction.

“Laugh it up, at least I’m having fun!” He points an accusatory finger at the two before turning his chin up with a dramatic flair. Toge rolls his eyes, and just as he’s about to end the video, (y/n’s) face pops up on the camera.

“He’s right!” She says, a bit too loudly for standing right in front of him, but drinking always raised her volume. She’s setting her cup down then, before reaching her free hand out to Toge, tugging on his wrist and disrupting the video that was still being recorded. “We should dance!”

“Mustard leaf!?” He replies, and she laughs, knowing it was his way of repeating ‘dance!?’ With uncertainty and surprise.

Her cheeks are pink, and he can’t make out if it’s because of the alcohol in her system, or if it was the brazen invitation of asking him to dance. He’s not given much time to decipher it’s cause before she’s pulling harder at his wrist, and without another moment’s hesitation, Toge pockets his phone and follows her silent plea. Distantly, he realizes she’s never had to work too hard to convince him of anything.

Maybe that was why they were all up far too late drinking together and dancing when they knew damn well that they had training bright and early tomorrow.

Panda’s cheering when (y/n’s) managed to drag Toge all the way into the common room where the music is playing the loudest. He’s already resumed his twirling as if Fleetwood Mac is playing and not Joan Jett, but he’s enjoying himself, and no one is about to ruin his fun… again.

Toge’s never really danced before, besides the occasional sway from side to side, or a head bop. So as soon as she starts swinging her hips and dragging his arm back and forth where she’s still got a grip on his wrist, he goes as stiff as a board.

It doesn’t take long before it dawns on her that he hasn’t been dancing, and she frowns at him, pulling at his arm to get him to come closer so she could talk to him.

“Why won’t you dance with me?” She asks, and it breaks his heart so completely that he can’t hide the way his face falls at her question. (y/n) brightens up immediately, a string of bubbly laughter falling from her lips as she shakes her head. “It’s not hard, just, move,” She says, shuffling her feet from side to side, her hips following in a languid motion. “See?”

He rolls his eyes at her, and she smacks his shoulder with her free hand, her semi-aggressive way of telling him he was making it a bigger deal than necessary, before both of her hands grab at his, and she guides him through the motions more properly.

The song that’s playing is upbeat, so she finds it easy to wave their arms together to the melody, while her hips keep the beat of the bass line. After a few jolty movements on his part, he eventually begins to mirror, and just as she thought, he gets the hang of it and doesn’t look so awkward dancing with her.

(y/n) can’t wipe her grin off her face as she continues to move their hands about in sporadic motions, sometimes to the beat, sometimes at random. Toge just latches his hands onto hers and lets her do whatever she pleases.

She’s never had to talk him into doing anything, he was always following her, whatever she was doing.

“See? It’s fun!” She’s the image of gleeful, twirling herself under one of his arms before prompting him to do the same.

Toge manages a few ‘salmon’s between her antics, before she starts to get more energetic with the beginning of the next song. She claims it’s a classic 2000’s dance beat, and that it would be criminal if they didn’t dance through it, too.

Of course that turned into a third dance, then a fourth, and along with them a few more drinks. They lose track of time, and eventually the rest of the world seems to fall away, too. It’s a Wednesday night- well, early Thursday morning now- but all responsibilities that the day will hold is far from their minds. It’s hard to notice that their friends have even started to wind down. Panda had collapsed on the floor with a pile of empty water bottles surrounding him, currently chugging down another one. Maki was scrolling through her phone nursing her own water, physically present, but too tired to engage in any more activities tonight.

And (y/n) and Toge were dancing around, jumping on their feet and twirling each other about like the night was still young and they had all the energy in the world. Until eventually, Maki had given up on adding anything to the queue, and random songs they’d never heard of were playing, (y/n) still insisted that he stay up with her and keep dancing until they couldn’t anymore.

That was, until Maki retreated to her room for the night, and with her went the music. (y/n) tried her best to plead with her to stay, but unfortunately Maki wasn’t as suggestable to her puppy dog eyes as Toge was.

“(y/n), listen to me closely,” Maki said in an uncharacteristically sweet voice, even going so far as to run a hand through her drunk friend’s hair. Thinking that she was going to stay at the ‘party’- if it could still be called that- (y/n) gleamed up at her with a syrupy smile and heavy eyelids. “Get some water, and get to bed”

(y/n) deflated immediately.

“Makiiii~” She whined, and made another noise of dissatisfaction when she lost the physical affection, too.

“No buts!” Maki quips as she walks away with her phone and powered down speaker in hand. “Toge, if you keep her up, then you’re dealing with the consequences tomorrow!” Maki barks at the other culprit to (y/n’s) deluded party-mode state.

“Salmon!” He hollers back, bringing his hand to his forehead in an all too serious salute. It brings out a load of giggles from (y/n) that has Maki sending one last warning glare at the two before she finally leaves.

Yeah, she absolutely wasn’t dealing with that mess in the mornings.

“She doesn’t hate us,” (y/n) sighs out to Toge, unprovoked, but he can tell she’s completely serious by the way she stares up at him. “She’s just grumpy she has to get up in the morning”

Toge raises his eyebrows with slight concern, before twirling his finger around in a short circle between them.

(y/n’s) jaw drops as she gapes at him.

“I know we do too,” She argues. “But it’ll be fine, I’m used to waking up early”

He gives her a look, but she doesn’t relent in her stare. So he pulls his phone out to show her the time.

2:48 A.M.

But her eyes barely register the hour, instead she’s glued to the wallpaper on his lockscreen, and she’s lighting back up with energy as she reaches for his phone and snatches it before he could react.

It was ridiculous how she maintained her speed and strength even when intoxicated. Toge wondered if it was safe for jujutsu sorcerers to drink this heavily.

“Is this us?” She asks, even though she was currently admiring the photo of the two of them on his lockscreen.

Toge’s quick to zip up his collar in order to hide the heat flushing his cheeks.

“This is so cute!” She delights in the image, cradling his phone in both hands as though to preserve it with great care.

The picture isn’t even new to her, and she’d been the one to take it. A few months ago she’d tried her hand at baking, and had been quite eager to bring a cinnamon cake to a hangout with the rest of their friends. She might’ve promised it before she was certain of her baking abilities, and had required Toge’s help not long into the process. As happy as he was to aid her in her new hobby, he couldn’t help but find humor in just how helpless she seemed to be in the kitchen at first. She hardly even knew her way around the cabinets. Hours later the cake had turned out just fine- their friends had even gone for seconds- but not without it’s difficulties.

Toge had snapped the photo when the cake had just been put into the oven, before they began the tedious cleanup process. She had flour in her hair and some stuck to her cheek. It was a good thing she’d chosen to wear an apron because it was covered in the various ingredients they’d used. But despite the messy state of herself and the kitchen in the background, she was grinning from ear to ear, clearly excited to see the results of her cake soon. Toge’s mirroring the smile, although there’s not a speck on him. After the whole process, he’d managed to keep himself completely clean.

“I didn’t know you made this your wallpaper, that’s really sweet,” She’s handing him his phone back after the torturous few seconds are over, and Toge slips it into his pocket quickly. His blush might’ve been hidden by the collar of his jacket, but it was still made obvious by his shifting eyes that couldn’t quite meet hers.

“That was a really fun day actually, we should bake something together again sometime!” She lights up, and he can tell that she’s already trying to think of something to go make right now. It’s clear she’s already forgotten the time- or maybe she just didn’t care that much. “We could-”

“Tuna tuna” Toge gives her a look, before tapping the back of his wrist a few times, hoping to remind her of the task at hand.

It was no wonder Maki rushed off to her own dorm.

(y/n) huffed in annoyance, but ultimately followed alongside him as he tried ushering her out of the common room and towards the dorms. She stumbled along and tried to slow him down, came up with a few more mumbled excuses to stay up later, all of which were met by quiet chuckles and reminders of ‘tuna’.

It took some ping-ponging down the halls, but eventually he got her to her room, and even though the night was over, she seemed rather pleased to be back in her own room.

“Spicy cod roe” Toge barely mumbles the words out as he’s gesturing about her room to her, before raising his hand to his mouth to mimic drinking a cup of water.

She smiles back at him in perfect understanding before she gives him a nod of her head.

Her movements are lazy as she strolls about the room to get changed into something she can sleep in. Her coordination was less than subpar compared to her usual level of functioning, but that wouldn’t be a problem for another few hours.

It’s not long before there’s a knock on her door, and she’s opening it with the brightness of a christmas tree when Toge is on the other side with two bottles of water.

Wordlessly, she invites him in by stepping aside and pulling the door open further. Toge passes off one of the bottles to her as he does so.

“Are you staying?” She asked, nodding to the bottle still in his hand. “We can watch a movie?” She offers hopefully.

It’s a little past three in the morning now. He tries to give her a look to reminder of this, but she doesn’t seem to care when she sticks her bottom lip out and folds her hands together in a pleading motion.

He sighs, and she brightens up again. It’s almost comical how small but sweet of a smile could have him agreeing to anything. It’s almost as if she’s the one with a cursed technique designed to compel, and not him.

While glancing through the array of dvds on her shelves, Toge wonders what things would be like if the roles had been reversed. If he was the one able to tell her his every thought and feeling as they pass. He wonders if she would have known how he felt about her a long, long time ago.

He’d dealt with his cursed speech in the best way that he could. Of course he didn’t love it, of course things would be easier if he could talk like anyone else, he could gamble a good ninety percent of his life would’ve gone smoother. No more stupid rice ball ingredients, and no more hoping that just a look would be enough to communicate to the girl he loves that he loves her. That he purely, wholly, desperately loves her.

He picks out a dvd and pops it into her player- she’d dragged it back into her room last week after waking him up in the middle of the night because she was in the mood to watch one of her favorites. Once the opening credit scenes start to roll, he finds that she’s already cozied up on one side of the bed, her blanket tucked to her chin, and her water bottle cradled in both of her hands. She smiles when he turns to her, and then pats the space beside her, waiting patiently for him to sit with her.

He lets out a sigh as he sinks into the mattress beside her. He taps his wrist twice before raising his hand and pinching his thumb and forefinger together, an easy way to gesture just for a little bit.

“Okay,” (y/n) nods, then takes the edge of her blanket to throw it over his lap too. “Just for a little bit” Her voice is merely a hum, words slurred together just a little bit, but there’s not a flicker of uncertainty in her features when she gazes upon him.

It’s only a few minutes into the movie when she slumps against him, the entire side of her body pressed into his, from their shoulders to their legs. Toge chuckles as she begins to give in to her exhaustion, and as sweet as it was that she got cuddly when she was drunk and sleepy, he prayed she’d pass out soon so that the morning wouldn’t be so rough. They were well past getting a full eight hours before training tomorrow, and dealing with Gojo alone would be a burden. Not because he would go rough on them- but because as soon as he sniffed out a little bit of a hangover, he’d be relentless with his teasing.

(And he might tack on a few extra laps on the track as minor punishment. Normally no big deal. But when you’re fighting off puking your guts out?)

Toge makes a mental note to have aspirin and a heavy meal ready first thing in the mornings so she could get it all out of her system as quickly as possible. One measly water bottle tonight just wouldn’t cut it.

When her head hits his shoulder in a soft thump, he looks down at her, checking to see if she’s finally fallen asleep. To his surprise, she tilts her head back in order to meet his gaze. Pink dusts over her cheeks and the corners of her mouth tilt upwards, no doubt a reaction from the alcohol in her system and their close proximity.

“You think I could get out of training with a sick day tomorrow?” She murmurs, earning a wince from Toge. She didn’t need words to understand what that meant. “You’re right,” She sighs, briefly turning her attention back to the movie. “Gojo’s gonna fry me”

This time he chuckles, and she glances back at him again.

“Mustard leaf…”

A small giggle escapes her as well, her eyes crinkling despite knowing the fate she would face come tomorrow.

“Maybe I’ll just fess up straight away,” She thinks aloud. “If I cry a bit, he might take pity on me, I dunno,”

Toge struggles to hold eye contact with her, not because the movie was just so enticing he could barely pay attention to her, but quite the opposite. With her cuddled up against his side and whispering so softly right into his ear he could hardly focus on anything other than her. To his knowledge, the rest of the world was completely wiped away. It was an ability she’d somehow mastered unknowingly, making him forget that there was anything else going on around them when the two of them were together.

His heart was pounding so hard in his chest he was sure she must notice, with how close she is, she could probably feel it, but if she does, she doesn’t say a thing.

“Or you could tell him I died,” She adds suddenly, and Toge snorts out a laugh, making her giggle again.

His eyes finally hold contact with hers for longer than a passing second, and she seems to melt further against him. She doesn’t feel heavy against his shoulder, but she might as well be an anchor keeping him trapped in place.

Yeah, there’s not a chance he’ll only be here for a little bit.

“You’d cover for me, right?” She asks, and it’s only meant to be a tease, but Toge raises his free arm that wasn’t being leaned on by hers, and crosses his finger over his heart. “Wow,” (y/n) gushes in her surprise, eyebrows raised and lips curling into a wider smile. She’s so beautiful to him at this moment that he now hopes he’ll be the one to pass out before he does something stupid. “Cross your heart and hope to die, huh?” She muses. “That’s pretty serious”

He scoffs again, barely rolling his eyes, but his attention is drawn back to her again when she shifts around to lay on her side. She’s still very much cuddled up to him, and he can tell she makes an effort to stay that way as she gets comfortable in a new position. She even hooks her ankle over his, a silent ask for him to stay longer. Her cheek leans back into his shoulder soon enough, and he knows he should be leaving when she starts to bat her eyelashes, but even as a Grade Two sorcerer he doesn’t have the strength to do so.

“Can I ask you a real question?”

Everyone’s least favorite question of all time.

Toge affirms with a nod of his head, barely managing a smile to assure her.

“Does it get old?” Her voice grows even softer. “Listening to me talk all the time?”

He shakes his head just as quickly, the smile disappearing as a knot forms between his pinched brows. She gives him a wobbly smile, feeling a bit endeared by how quickly he tried to tell her otherwise.

“Really?” She asks, still a bit unsure. “Sometimes I try to shut my mouth, I… I don’t want to make you feel like you’re stuck listening to me all the time, but, uh, I can’t help it sometimes. I… really like talking to you” She’s rambling before she knows it- and then blushing at the irony of it all.

His smile returned then, stretching wide until his teeth were showing, and he was laughing quietly at her. Not to be malicious, of course, he was simply amused and absolutely lovestruck by the sweet admission. Toge reached out, affectionately touching the pad of his thumb to her chin, before he shifted around to get his phone out of his pocket.

This didn’t call for rice ball ingredients, or small gestures to convey what he was thinking. He’d need to communicate properly to her with how much he’d have to say.

(y/n) watched on as he opened his notes app and began to type.

it could never get old. i like listening to you talk :)

It makes her heart stutter in her chest, but she can’t help the giggle that escapes her when he adds a little emoji, too. Toge spaces down to a new line before typing more.

does it get old that i can’t talk with you the same way?

He watches as her eyes scan over the screen quickly, before she turns to him and shakes her head.

“Of course not,” She tells him right away. “I- I think we understand each other just fine… don’t we?”

It dawns on her that they’ve never really talked about this before. Even when they first met, it was like she was told he had cursed speech and she took it upon herself to learn how he communicated as quickly as possible. Perhaps all that time she spent around him those first few months after her enrollment were what led to their closeness now. Saying she was headstrong in being able to understand him would have been an understatement. She had constantly been picking up on the subtleties between his rice ball ingredients, or paying attention to every hand movement or direction of his gaze to know what he was talking about.

And it was a very, very rare case when she couldn’t understand him. Toge could hardly recall a time it had happened.

He sets his phone down on his lap, nodding his head back at her as his eyes shifted between hers. Her lashes hung heavy, eyelids almost falling shut with every blink, but she wasn’t giving into sleep just yet.

She mirrors his nod with a short one of her own, her eyes filled with an emotion he can’t say he’s ever seen in her before. He studies it curiously, forgetting any sense of embarrassment from staring at her so blatantly… but then again, she wasn’t exactly shying away either. Was it the alcohol?

“Toge,” His name falls from her lips in a mere breath, so small her mouth hardly moves, so quiet it almost doesn’t grace his ears. “I… I hope you know you can tell me anything… anytime…”

It’s such a sweet admission that he can’t help but reach out to her again, his thumb touching her chin in the way he usually does when he’s teasing her, but now it feels… different. His touch lingers, and the look in his eyes feels heavier than she’s used to. She’s flustering suddenly, her heartbeat picking up in pace, her face feeling even hotter the longer she holds his stare. After another prolonged minute of his touch to her face, she finds herself reaching up for his hand, cupping the back of it and holding it there for just a few moments longer.

And then comes a delicate, carefully worded whisper on his part.

“I know”

He pauses for a few seconds after he says it, just to be sure there were no lasting effects left on her. Just as he expected, those words didn’t seem to hold any cursed energy, and she didn’t seem paralyzed or compelled in the slightest. She simply smiles back at him, her eyelashes batting a few more times.

“Okay, good,” She murmurs, before tucking herself closer to him, nuzzling her head into his chest to get comfortable.

She’s long forgotten the movie that was playing, and honestly, so had he. Toge knows now it’s only a matter of minutes before she’s finally knocked out. With a yawn, she finally drops her hand from his, but Toge opts to leave it in it’s place, carefully cradled under her jaw, his thumb swiping over her cheekbone in slow and lazy movements.

“Just stay the night, ‘kay?” She mumbles into his shirt, throwing her free arm over his waist. “If someone notices, I’ll take the blame,” She says, and then quickly adds, “But no one will”

His chest vibrates beneath her when he chuckles, and she merely smiled to herself as sleep finally overcomes her.

Toge hesitates on moving to turn off the tv. Any one wrong move and he’d risk waking her, and he certainly didn’t want to do that. So with drawn out movements, he carefully gets the tv turned off, and places the remote on the nightstand.

(y/n) doesn’t wake up, to his luck, she doesn’t even stir. She’s sound asleep, dead weight like a rock on top of him. But a welcome rock she was.

He didn’t even mind having to sleep in a half seated position, or the fact that the arm she’s laying on is starting to prickle with pins and needles. None of it matters when he can faintly feel her heart beating against his chest, right beside his.

Toge only got a hair of sleep that night, but even during the rough training session the following morning, all he could think about was how soft her hair felt when he’d run his hand through it.

If what came after falling in love was a crash landing, he was definitely nearing the ground.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

When he first comes to, all Toge can barely make out is the dim light above him. His mind is hazy, a swarm of disconnected thoughts like ‘where am I?’ and ‘why are the lights so dim in Shoko’s infirmary?’. Nothing really makes sense until the haze begins to clear.

The next sense to come back was his hearing, and he wished it had taken a little longer because it wasn’t pleasant.

At first it’s just a sharp ringing, distant at first, like someone blowing a whistle far away from here. But it didn’t take long for it to grow nearer and nearer, until eventually it was right in front of him, breaking through to let him take in the other sounds around him.

Whimpering. Soft weeping, maybe. Quiet, like the owner of the quiet cries, was trying not to wake him.

Then it was sniffling, also quiet and contained. So faint he could just barely make it out, but paired with the cries, it wasn’t hard to understand what was going on.

He has to squeeze his eyes shut after the short exposure to the yellow light, but soon enough he’s forcing them open again. This time he’s greeted with the blurry silhouette of the crier.

“(y/n)-”

It’s no surprise his throat is so dry and raw that he feels blood pool on his tongue as soon as he rasps out her name, but it was enough to capture her attention, so he tries to ignore the pain for now.

A hushed “Ohmygod” is whispered under her breath so fast her lips barely move, before she’s a blurry mess of movements above him. His eyes can’t track everything, but he thinks her hands are shaking around his face from the tapping over her fingertips on his cheeks. “You’re- you’re awake?” She mumbles out, a hint of a whimper still trembling in her voice.

Just as he parts his lips to give her an affirmative response, her eyes widen, and her fingertips press further into his cheeks until he can feel the full length of her fingers against his skin. They’re still shaking, but her touch is warm.

“Wait, don’t say anything, I’m sure your throat’s a mess right now,” Even when she’s not sniffling over her words, they’re watery, just a little bit stuck in her throat. “But you’re- you’re awake,” She repeats, a smile briefly stretching on her lips, before it quickly falls back into that wobbly frown. His vision begins to focus when he settles it there, hoping it’ll disappear into another smile again.

Why was she such a wreck? She’d never cried over him before, and he’s been injured plenty of times, Toge couldn’t wrap his mind around it. It was making it harder to fight past the hazy state of waking up.

There were small, wet splashes against his face that startled him enough to change his focus, eyes suddenly moving his line of sight upwards, finding her eyes were in fact full of tears, and most of them were streaming down her face. He can’t say or do much, but concern is evident on his face.

“Are you in pain? Does anything hurt?” She wipes uselessly at the tears on her face when she speaks. The dry patches were just as quickly replaced by more streaks of tears.

Toge shakes his head, although it’s not a complete truth. His head is still spinning, the metallic taste of blood was burning the scratches in his throat, but most peculiar was the dull ache of his left arm. It wasn’t a sharp pain, or even enough to bring a tear to his eye, and yet the throbbing of it captured all of his attention. He couldn’t not think about it. Was it broken? Why hadn’t Shoko healed it? It never feels like this after her Reverse Cursed Technique…

“Okay,” (y/n) whimpers, sniffling before she speaks again. “Okay, that- that’s good, that’s good…” Her voice grows quiet, and Toge’s shaking his head at her again, trying to voice his confusion with this whole ordeal, trying to ask her what was wrong.

All he can do is twitch his right hand until she notices, and as soon as she turns her head, she picks his hand up in both of hers. She’s swift but gentle, cradling it as if his bones would shatter from a movement too rough. He tries to curl his fingers around hers, but it takes too much effort, so he goes to bring his other hand around hers as well.

A strained gasp escapes him when he lifts his left arm, his eyes shooting open from the pain and difficulty of the action, neck swiveling to see what was so wrong that he couldn’t do something so simple as to hold her hand and comfort her.

They’re both frozen when he finally looks at his left arm. Or, lack thereof.

(y/n’s) crying seems to cease completely as she holds her breath, and Toge’s chest is moving rapidly, but his inhales and exhales are nearly silent.

When he looks up at her again, she brings a hand to her mouth, stifling the sob that shakes her entire body as she begins to cry again, just as hard as she had when she’d found him.

“I’m- I’m sorry,” Is what she says first, it’s all that really comes to mind at first, she doesn’t know where to begin, how she’s supposed to explain it to him, what the gentle way of proceeding was.

She almost wished someone was here now, but there wasn’t. There was no one. Everyone was either missing, or had died in the aftermath, there was only the two of them. The world had shrunk down to leave just the two of them it seemed- and they weren’t allowed their peace.

“Shibuya- it’s- when I found you-” She tries, she really does, but so many words flood her mind at once that they get lodged in her throat, and she’s never really learned how to navigate this sort of thing before. This was always Gojo’s job, or Nanami’s…

With a deep breath, (y/n) straightens her posture as she’s kneeled beside Toge on the ground, and she gives his hand a small squeeze.

“Without a Reversed Curse Technique, I did the best that I could,” She says, a little bit more clearly, but not without a few hiccups. “The runes on the wrappings should keep it from getting infected, at the very least,”

Toge looks back at his left side again, taking in a long, good look at the missing space where the rest of his arm used to be. Then his gaze shifts upwards, where what’s left of his bicep is wrapped in perfect bindings. It appears every inch of the gauze is covered in neatly drawn runes.

How long had this taken her? How long had he been out?

“It’s been a couple of days,” She sighs, pushing a hand through her hair and slouching again. “It’s not… great, as you can see,” She adds, gesturing around them.

It’s only then that Toge’s really taken in their surroundings. They’re in a tent, that’s just big enough for the two of them. The shitty light his eyes had adjusted to was just a lantern tied around the center post.

“But it’s worked for now… I’ve been out a few times, there’s water, um, some food…” She trails off as she’s glancing around, already losing pace and barely keeping up with what she’s saying. What was she supposed to say? “I… I haven’t crossed paths with anyone else yet”

Toge’s hand twitches in hers, fingers flexing for a moment before he pulls it out of her hold. It’s slow and shaky when he brings his hand to her face, but he is able to make the reach. She leans closer to him so he wouldn’t have to stretch too much. Toge presses the entirety of his palm into her cheek, fingertips prodding at her hairline, thumb tracing against her cheekbone.

That wobbly smile returns when she presses her palm against the back of his hand. She’s still crying, but it seems a little more under control. He wonders if she’s even aware of the never ending tears, or if she’s grown used to it.

“Thank you”

A watery scoff of a laugh escapes her, and then she shakes her head at him.

“You shouldn’t be thanking me,” She mumbles, and his thumb begins to drag lower, across the hollow of her cheek, coming to the corner of her mouth.

He nods his head to make his argument, a furrow in his brows that tells her he’s serious, but she doesn’t seem to take him as such.

“We’re in the middle of nowhere,” She sniffles. “There’s barely any food, I’ve been in this ruined uniform for days, all of our friends are missing and the strongest sorcerer in the world is in the prison realm, you’re hurt, and it very well may be the end of the world-”

He has to drop his hand from her face in order to have the strength to push himself into a sitting position, but once he does he’s just as quick to bring it back.

She’s crying too much to keep adding to her list of everything that’s gone wrong in the last few days, but this time Toge tries to wipe the tears away as he shushes her softly. It takes a few minutes, but eventually the tears come to a stop, and Toge drops his hand again.

This time he makes a gesture to her. It’s drawn out, despite it being a simple one. He points his finger out, touching it to her collarbone, then his eyes meet hers again, and they’re tearing up again. He frowns. Then taps her shirt a few more times, trying to make his point clearer.

You’re still here.

He can only hope that more taps will make sense to her.

The corner of (y/n’s) lips tilt upwards, and he thinks with the amount of emotions flickering behind her eyes, that understanding is amongst them.

“I’m glad you’re here… with me,” She mumbles out. “I don’t know what I would’ve done….” The thought trails off with her words, and she turns her head away, chewing on the inside of her cheek. The exhale she lets out instead is slow, and shaky.

Toge lifts his hand to turn her chin back towards him, a frown on his face as his eyes meet hers.

Again, he points at her, but this time he presses the pad of his finger square against her chin, and then turns it towards himself, mirroring the touch to his own chin. A crease forms between her brows, and he repeats it- tapping her chin twice with a featherlight touch, and then his own.

We’re both still here.

Weakly, another smile graced her lips. She understood.

“Whatever is next, we take on together… yeah?” She asks him, her voice hushed, a certain anxiety filling her chest with a crawling feeling, but Toge’s response couldn’t have eased it away faster.

He nods, leaning in closer, bringing his hand back to her cheek so he could tilt her head downward just the slightest, enough for him to brush his lips over her forehead in a light kiss. So light if she wasn’t staring at him with wide eyes, she might’ve missed it altogether.

Like a deer caught in headlights, she holds her stare even once Toge’s pulled away. Her parted lips holding no definitive emotion, he’s not exactly sure what she’s thinking when she stares at him like that, but he doesn’t feel any regret from the action. They were all they had now, and there might not be any amount of comfort to delude them into thinking things were going to turn out perfectly fine, but they could certainly try. Perhaps they could go just a few minutes at a time feeling some relief.

They weren’t alone. And despite it all, they were alive. At this moment anyways, Toge couldn’t ask for more.

With the backs of her hands, (y/n) roughly wipes away the lingering tears on her face, before she reaches out to him. Just as her hands cradle around his face, he’s meeting her halfway, eyes shut before their lips even touch.

As hasty as it is, it’s a tender kiss. Neither one of them wanted to move too fast at the risk of bumping an injury, but the years of pent up emotions came pouring out of it nonetheless. Her calloused and bruised hands somehow feel silky smooth when they glide over his jaw. Any fears or pains melt away under the gift of her soft kiss. Toge could almost forget all of it, just for that moment.

When she pulls away, quietly panting to catch her breath after holding it the entirety of the kiss, the unreadable look on her face fades away into something else. Bittersweet relief.

Her eyes shift between his, finding the same emotion in them that she’s currently feeling. Affectionately, her thumbs trace over the markings on either side of his mouth. There’s a moment of silence between them as they bask in the first pleasant moment they’d had in a while. It’s no surprise that it’s only come when they’re together.

“We’ll find the others,” (y/n) murmurs assuredly after a minute. “We’ll figure it out,” And as she says it, she starts to believe it, slowly but surely she pulls herself out of her cynicism, hope and certainty replacing it when she looks at him. “Together”

His own hand slides across her cheek and wraps comfortably at the nape of her neck, holding her delicately but closely. Toge nods, smiling back at her with as much conviction as he could.

“Together”

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

[ it’s a cruel, cruel world, but we don’t care // cause what we’ve got, we’ve got to share ]

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

xoxo ~ jordie a/n: for anyone who got the little miss sunshine edit mwah mwah mwah bc it's a comfort movie of mine <3

#inumaki toge x reader #toge x reader #inumaki x reader #toge inumaki x reader #toge inumaki #inumaki toge #inumaki toge imagine #toge inumaki imagine #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #inumaki toge x reader fluff #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk imagine #jujutsu kaisen imagine

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andradrawsstuff · 3 months

Text

Ok, hear me out-

The penguins are DnD nerds.

But so are the chimps, so they’d have like a whole little party and play their campaign every Thursday or something

Some headcannons:

Mason is their dungeon master

Phil is the ranger

Kowalski is a wizard

Private is their cleric

Rico is obviously the barbarian

Skipper usually goes fighter or rogue

Marlene and Julien would join later since they are newer to the zoo and they’d start a new campaign with them

Marlene is a sorcerer and is chaotic good

The penguins would make Julien be the bard lmao

The whole party is chaotic neutral apart from Marlene and Private who are chaotic good and lawful good 💀

Some other headcannons:

Kowalski and Marlene will constantly rival about who is the better magician and fight about it like siblings, but Kowalski is very arrogant about it

Skipper tries paladin once even though everyone tells him it’s a bad idea, but he doesn’t listen - he accidentally oathbreaks within the first 5 minutes and makes them restart the whole campaign

When they see Rico get randomly encumbered it’s immediately a cause for concern, because they instantly know he just yoinked some barrels of gunpowder and alcohol and is planning something really stupid

Marlene and Kowalski make up their own spells and constantly cast them on each other, much to Mason’s dismay - “I cast… MANUAL BREATHING!” “I cast… PARENTS FIND YOUR TEENAGE SKETCHBOOK!”

Skipper is an absolute menace as a rogue and always uses sleight of hand on his friends which he finds very funny

Marlene will do ANYTHING just to spite Kowalski

Private is the strongest and takes it the most seriously, so he usually has to dig the others out of their own shenanigans

Julien is the first to die in every situation, usually because his use of vicious mockery comes to bite him back in the ass

Rico loves to use his friends as improvised weapons

Mason is a very good narrator, but usually goes on forever until someone has to tell him to get to the point

Private collects EVERYTHING he finds along the way and makes Rico carry it when he gets encumbered

Phil and Rico turn into partners in crime and cause chaos and destruction wherever they go - they love to use explosives in battle which ends up with half the party dead

They always make Alice the final boss of their campaign

Maurice loves his weekly break from Julien

That’s it for now :)

#tpom #the penguins of madagascar #penguins of madagascar #dnd #tpom skipper #tpom kowalski #tpom rico #tpom private #tpom marlene #tpom phil and mason #king julien #headcannons #tpom headcannons #pretty sure there’s an episode where they play with toy soldiers and it made me think of dnd lmao #and the superhero episode

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mvltisstuff · 1 year

Note

hello again!! im the anon who requested sweet nothing (also, saw the edit note and don’t worry it was a fantastic fic and i love it, thank you so much for writing it ❤️) i was wondering if i could request another fic for buck where reader is like athena’s protege and she’s a lot like athena so athena and bobby basically play match maker for them, thinking they’d compliment each other very well but buck and the reader have secretly dating since they met bc they hit it off so well and athena and the 118 end up finding out and are shocked they had no idea. thank you if you get to this, no stress if you don’t. i hope you have a lovely day and remember to take breaks and drink water!!

the feels - e.b

summary: above :)

evan buckley x reader

a/n: i love seeing these requests so much, please leave as many as you want, this one is so sweet 🫶🫶 i wanted to recreate the funny scene when may walked in on athena in bobby’s turnout 😭

the grants were sitting in the kitchen waiting for another delicious meal from bobby to be ready to eat. athena was sitting down, playing a card game with her two children as bobby was stirring a boiling pot. sharing stories about their days, athena begins her own.

“the station welcomed a new recruit today,” athena starts while cleaning up the cards. “i think i was telling you about her.”

“y/n? i remember you told me she was going to be working there, i just didn’t know she’d be with you.”

“she’s not riding along with me, but we’ve spoken a lot. she reminds me of myself. she’s young but one of the most determined ones i’ve seen. i think she has a lot of great potential.”

“maybe you should bring her along one day,” bobby suggests. “she sounds cool, you should bring her to the station one night for dinner there.”

“i’ll have to check her schedule. she’s trying to get more comfortable in LA, so that could help her. give her some friends,” athena says. “i know she came here to get away for a bit, i’m not sure why but i think something at home.”

“might wanna be careful bringing her, now that i’m thinking about it.”

“what makes you say that?” she asks.

“i’m worried someone might take a liking to her. buck loves you, and he reminds me of myself. and if she’s really similar to you…” athena walks over to bobby, giving him a light kiss before beginning again. “i’ll see what her timing is, i’ll let you know so you can tame the lion.”

the next day at work, y/n walks in uniform with her chunky belt with her gear. she sweetly says good morning to the people at the front with a cup of coffee before returning to her bosses office. “y/n?” she hears someone say from behind her.

“sergeant grant! hello, i was just about to go get started,” y/n says politely to her superior.

“you can call me athena, officer.”

“ok, athena,” y/n has a bright smile that could be the source of light to the room. “is there anything i can do for you?”

“no, you’re all set. just making sure things are good for you here,” athena knows that she’s strong despite the kindness act she puts on. she’s seen she’s not afraid to stand up for herself against all the men at the station. similar to herself, she’s ready for anything god throws at her. “if you get off earlier tonight, i was going to the 118. my husband is bobby nash, and he’s having dinner. i thought it would be a good place for you to settle in.”

“that sounds great, athena. i get off a bit earlier today.”

“good,” athena says with a thin grin. “i’ll see you then, y/l/n.”

they both walk away, going to do their paperwork and jobs of the day. on the first call, they had to deal with a specific threat, making two arrests as y/n shoved them back into the car.

she had easily clicked into her workplace, impressing everyone with her skill and ease with the job. her quick thinking came in extreme need, and athena knew she was going to be one of the best eventually.

after another call, the fire department had been at a site of a crash with drunk driving robbers. the police had been called to observe the suspects and ask them questions about the accident and even before that. after some of the crash on the street was cleaned up, y/n had been on the side, informing dispatch on the current nature of the situation. she was hanging around near one of the trucks when a man, couldn’t have been over 30, walked over to her.

“hey,” he says with a seducing smile, looking her uniform up and down. “i haven’t seen you around yet.”

“i’ve just started working here, i was a cop before but i recently moved here.”

“you liking it? LA can be a lot,” he tells her. “i’m evan buckley, 118. buck.”

y/n smiles and shakes his hand. “you’re from 118? athena and bobby invited me over for dinner tonight.”

“y-you’re y/n?” buck asks, a little surprised. she’s gorgeous, her hair was done back in neat braids. her uniform complemented her well, making her look like a boss, but also looks sweet with her bright smile and laugh. buck noticed her beauty and grace in handling herself.

athena and bobby stood to the side, meeting up at the end of the shift. “i think it’s too late,” bobby says, pointing to y/n and buck flirting very clearly to everyone but themselves. athena would never admit it, but she was actually happy. she thought buck needed woman like her, and she needed one like buck, and after a whole night of convincing each other before bed, they finally decided to take up a new career in match making.

the dinner had gone well, the team asking y/n about her past and why she wanted to become a cop. someone in particular was mesmerized by her stories. “so, y/n, where did you grow up?” eddie asks.

“i was raised in boston, and i went to suffolk for criminal justice,” y/n says. “i knew i wanted to help people, and i came to LA as an escape honestly. just try something new.”

they all nod and smile as they finish their food, laughing about shared stories and the two spend the night eyeing each other.

a couple months had gone by, and buck and y/n had been better close. very close. they were seeing each other almost every day, meeting up outside work to see each other. for being a bad liar, buck was hiding their relationship very well. they started dating a few weeks after the dinner, and no one had any idea. or at least they thought.

buck was definitely head over heels for y/n. she was a person who dominated wherever she was, but carried herself around with respect and a soothing personality. coming home from work, she was always a person to talk to. her sweet and gentle words were always a comfort to him. he thought she was the most lovely person ever.

y/n was obsessed with buck after she met him. he was incredibly charming, being able to light up a room at any time. being able to spend time with him at the end of their shifts was truly the highlight of her day, and she hadn’t felt this happy in a long time. he helped her get settled in the new city that she was venturing. he was always a shoulder to lean on during the bad days, and one to celebrate with after the good ones.

chimney and maddie had been driving over to bucks apartment. they had all agreed to have dinner together so she could spend time with her little brother.

buck on the other hand, had been too preoccupied to remember the plans.

y/n was dressed in a lace bra and panties set, wearing bucks work shirt with his name and badge on it. she was sitting on top of the counter with buck standing between her legs.

when chimney and maddie walked in, they saw bucks bare back, and both of their half-naked bodies. luckily, buck still had his boxers on, and y/n had his shirt. her arms were wrapped around his shoulders, a pair of handcuffs in her hands. “oh my god! evan!” maddie shouted and buck turned around.

“jesus, maddie!” he yelled and his immediate instinct was to cover up y/n. “what are you doing here?”

“some of us had dinner plans,” chimney adds, watching in a humorous way.

“you had dinner plans?” y/n asks.

buck throws his head back in frustration. “im sorry, guys, i completely forgot.”

“clearly.” maddie and chim say, together. “we’re going to go in the hall, give you a minute. while i call bobb-“ chim starts.

“no! do not call bobby because then he and athena will hate me!”

“i think athena would fire me,” y/n says.

“are you kidding? they’ve been trying to force you two together for months!”

y/n and buck give each other a confused look because they both thought they’d want them separate. surely, they weren’t stopping it but they especially didn’t think they would encourage it. they start laughing at each other hysterically at the thought of their superiors trying to get them hooked up. maddie and chimney exit in a hurry, leaving to the hallway.

“well, wanna continue?” buck asks and y/n gives him a questioning look.

“we have like 2 minutes, babe,” she smiles. “i don’t know if we have time.”

“you doubting me?” he says, leaning back in and kissing her again.

“prove me wrong, then,” she smirks and they spend their few minutes not wasting a second.

“bobby! sorry to bother you tonight, but you’re gonna want to hear this!” chim says after calling the captain.

bobby hangs up the phone, and is sitting next to the athena on their couch. athena hears the whole conversation. “i’ll quit my job if you quit yours, and we can start our own business.”

“agreed,” athena says, giving bobby a high-five at their dating app skills. “i will say i’m surprised they kept it a secret. she did seem a bit more upbeat though.”

“so what’s next? getting them engaged?”

“ok, woah. let’s not get too ahead of ourselves. we’ll give ‘em a bit i guess.”

“fine, but i’m getting every detail about this tomorrow from him.”

“i’ll get it from y/n, we will reconvene after a short recess.”

#911 #911onfox #bobby nash #eddie diaz #evan buckley #evan buckley fanfic #evan buck buckley x reader #evan buckley x reader #athena grant #henrietta wilson #howie han #maddie buckley

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f1oricide · 1 year

Text

Yan Michelangelo hc

OK so-

I literally had a thought abt this and it was so jarring and crazy I had to write abt it. Keep in mind that writing is NOT my strong suit so bare with me okay. Also for the record I don’t condone any of this stuff Irl okay, there’s a diff between fantasy and reality.

TW: dark, possessive themes, gore, blood, cannibalism, mentions of worship, nonconsensual touching (not sexual), kidnapping, delulu Mikey <3

When you guys first meet, after the initial freak out you might have, he gets attached quick

It’s love at first sight <3

Could you blame him tho? He’s socially outcasted from society ofc not-

Anything you want? You got it! He will do anything to get that thing you barely mentioned wanting, no matter what

He would definitely try budding in every time your with anybody but him

Skateboarding with Leo? He happens to walk in with a skateboard. Having a tea party with Raph? You guys look like your running out of tea, but don’t fear! Your new butler is here!

Point is, he’s fine with sharing your time because like all good things, it’s even better when shared! He just has to be there too…you don’t mind right?

Won’t mind if you get a partner…

Just don’t expect to hear from them if they have the AUDACITY to make you so much as frown-

He doesn’t need to be your center of attention 24/7, he’s a secure turtle after all. He just wants to be near you, to keep you happy and safe!

Even if you can’t tell he’s there-

He is a VERY Delusional Yandere, you can be doing the most devious, horrendous war crimes and he’ll still think your a saint, everyone else is in the wrong for being in your way

Anyone who talks bad abt you, well… you can’t waste perfectly tenderized meat can you!

Real talk for a sec, I see a lot of people hc Mikey to be a heavy worshipper but I don’t think he’d think your a GOD, going down on his knees for you, but I think he’d see you as a angel and treat you as such

How? Lots and LOTS of cuddles (even if you don’t want to), positive affirmations, and overall codling

Cutie pie, angel, sweet potato, expect lots of cheesy nicknames

Now onto the juicy stuff-

Cooking, in his opinion, is a form of ART! Something to express himself with while also sharing that experience with his loved ones

Putting so much blood sweat and tears into perfecting his craft, creating a delectable meal for all

So imagine his (not so) sudden shock when he starts fantasizing abt you…eating him…literally…

HEAR ME OUT OKAY PLEASE-

In that one meat sweats ep, he was SO DOWN TO BE EATEN, because he sees Rupert in a higher light, he’s his idol!

He put his own blood sweat and tears for you, your his everything! This is his declaration of love for you and you alone, the one dish he won’t give to anybody else

At first he felt an immense satisfaction when you chowed down on the dishes he made specially for you, the sight made his chest swell!

But soon that feeling faded, something inside him started wanting more, until it eventually became Mikey’s every waking thought, pounding against his ribs until it’s satisfied again

So he did what any rational person would do! Invite you down for a taste test! Hah you thought I would say kidnapping didn’t you?

…

Well your right, he may or may not have laced those pastries you were taste testing

“Think of it as a forever slumber party! I knew you’d be just as excited as me, can’t hold in those happy tear too huh? :’)”

He really believes you want to stay as much as he wants you to stay, doesn’t matter what you do, you’ll always be his saint, wanting to stay by his side <3

You have a specially made “room” hidden in his room, that you stay in

Has all the necessities and everything, thanks dee

He often comes by to chat, make arts and crafts, and cuddle you, he’s barely out of his room even his brothers start to worry

Can’t have his brothers believe your…”funny” jokes now huh? They’d ruin the fun!

Starts to ever so slowly try to get you to agree with his… idea

Slowly starts incorporating more meat into the meals he makes you, mentioning how turtle is a delicacy in some places- you get the idea

But in Mikey fashion, he doesn’t like to wait to get what he wants

He suddenly starts asking you strange questions from, “did you know that cute hamsters cannibalize each other? CRAZY right!?” To “have you ever wanted to know what turtle taste like..?”

Eventually his patience thins and nervously asks the big question, but you’d understand right? Ofc you would! He shouldn’t be so nervous around you!

Ofc after hearing his request you start to understandably freak out, will he want to take a bite out of you too? Is this it? You don’t want to die like this!

Don’t worry! he could never ruin perfection, your a work of art!

(He’ll be happy breaking your skin with his teeth and lapping up the blood tho)

Surprisingly, he won’t FORCE you to do it, but be prepared for his mighty persistence and requests

He’s pretty much trying to hype you up

If you cave he is OVER THE MOON

He is inside you.. LITERALLY (idk how else to phrase it don’t be weird pls-)

Constant praise and affection is what you earn while you contemplate what you had just done

If you don’t cave, he’ll start to get a bit aggressive with his hype, and starts slowly giving you less and less food you until you do it-

Before he kidnapped you he was a bit clingy, but AFTER? Attached to your hip 24/7 baby

5/10 experience, you will be scarred for life leaving you with a bad taste in your mouth. But other than that expect lots and lots of cuddles and delicious not human food!

Sorry if it’s a bit all over the place, pls lmk if I made a spelling/grammar mistake. Writing this was actually very fun, I might do more in the future until I draw again. Maybe I’ll do both!Okay thx for reading tho bye :>

-f1oricide <3

#rottmnt #rottmnt x reader #fanfic #yandere rottmnt #yandere #yandere mikey #yandere Michelangelo #yandere rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #x reader #yandere x reader #crazy shit

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bleucaesura · 6 months

Text

STOLITZØ - SIXTY TWO

The two lay in bed, Stolas cozied up to Blitzø’s side and his head on his chest. Blitzø had his arms wrapped around Stolas, resting his cheek on the top of his head.

They’d both gotten extremely light-headed earlier and begrudgingly decided to “save more for later”. They both hated that their bodies were betraying them, but Stolas had also pointed out that they probably had more to talk about before rushing back into bed with each other again.

Blitzø had grumbled but agreed. Being emotionally communicative sucked sometimes.

Stolas snuggled up under Blitzø’s chin and nuzzled his neck.

“F*ck!” Blitzø palmed Stolas’s face and tried to push him away. “That tickles dammit!”

Stolas chuckled and kissed Blitzø’s palm, making him jerk his hand back and blush.

Stolas smiled up at him.

“Think you’re funny, huh?” Blitzø grinned mischievously and tackled Stolas, attacking him with tickles.

“Blitzø!” Stolas shrieked. He flailed and squawked and tried to curl in a ball to protect himself. “Blitzy! Please!”

Stolas cried from laughter.

“You won’t do it again?” Blitzø continued to tickle him.

“I won’t!” Stolas gasped through his laughter.

“Prooooomise?”

“I promise!”

“Good.” Blitzø stopped and pecked Stolas on the end of the beak with a quick kiss. He smirked down at him, feeling very smug.

Stolas gasped through his panicked laughter and tried to catch his breath.

Blitzø sat back and watched Stolas gather himself. His smile slowly faded.

“Stolas?” Blitzø looked down at his hands.

“Hm?” Stolas smiled up at him.

“Why would you do this to yourself?” Blitzø peeked at him. “Be honest.”

Stolas’s face dropped. He averted his gaze.

Blitzø bristled.

Dammit…

“Asmodeus says you’ve been draining yourself.” Blitzø’s voice was cold. “Don’t you DARE say you’ve been doing it because you love me… Because, I’ll never forgive you…”

Stolas froze. He finally turned and met Blitzø’s eyes. There was so much pain there. He sat up, reached out and took Blitzø’s hands in his.

“I’m sorry. I forgot to do my rituals because I dropped everything to find you when you disappeared. Because I love you. The rituals were the last thing on my mind.”

“Ok… Fine… I can get that I suppose…” Blitzø averted his gaze. “But… The rest?”

Stolas hung his head in shame.

“I couldn’t save you with my power. I was no use to you. I needed to be useful. Somehow. And you weren’t waking up. I was afraid you’d never wake up. I didn’t want to be left behind. I couldn’t be.”

His eyes stung with tears.

“I can’t imagine a world without you in it, Blitzø. I was ready to walk away if that’s what you wanted, but I would have known you were alive and happy. But to exist when you don’t? I… I couldn’t…”

Stolas sniffled.

Blitzø grabbed his face.

“Don’t you EVER f*cking do anything like this again! Do you hear me?”

Stolas stared wide-eyed back at him.

“Don’t you EVER f*cking talk about not existing like it’s no big deal!” Blitzø's voice shook. “It’s a HUGE deal!”

Stolas reached up and held Blitzø’s face affectionately. He smiled meekly.

“It’s a huge f*cking deal…” Blitzø sniffled, fighting back tears.

Stolas kissed Blitzø tenderly, then touched his forehead to his.

“Ok.”

Blitzø pulled him in for another quick kiss.

“…Ok.”

Blitzø rested his head on Stolas’s chest. He wrapped his arms around him and soon after, they’d laid down and fallen asleep in each other’s arms.

*****

#helluva boss #blitzø #stolitz #stolas #fanfic #blitzø x stolas #helluva boss fanfiction #vivzieverse #vivziepop #stolas helluva boss #blitz helluva boss #stolitz fanfic #vivienne medrano #brandon rogers

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ennabear · 6 months

Note

hii !! 🫶🏻 just discovered your account and i love it !! :) i was wondering if you could write some more headcannons about ellie? like, what job would she do? etc. i like to think that if she existed today, she'd probably be an illustrator for children's books !! that'd be so cool, tbh. i can see her making books about space or dinosaurs, and going to book fairs at schools to meet kiddos and talk to them about it. (crossover with professor!abby who used to teach little kids 🫶🏻🫶🏻) aah. sorry for rambling. but like, i just think ellie would have a blast if she existed today. like with all the museums ?? all the new ways to make art ?? but anyway !! what are *your* headcannons for modern ellie !! 🪐🫶🏻

modern!ellie’s job!! (hc) 🦕

thx for the request bae cause this made me smile so big. i have SO many hcs for modern ellie like i’ve been waiting for this moment!!!!! also dw about rambling i love to hear your thoughts 🤗

ok for starters i think ellie would be a nerd in high school. i know that some people headcanon her as a jock or a stoner (and that ellie has a special place in my heart) but i definitely think she’d be the opposite tbh. i imagine her with only a few friends (dina, jesse, cat). and i also think she’d have insanely good grades because she’s just smart like that. and all of her teachers love her because even though she’s quiet, she’s really kind and creative.

also i think her family would be just her and joel and maybe a dog. like imagine her spending her weekends getting guitar lessons from joel and then taking her dog on a walk and documenting it in her journal. she would fr have such a blast!!!!

for college i definitely think she’d major in astronomy/astrophysics or maybe art history?? and in her last years of college, she’d get a job as a secretary for a science museum. honestly, she didn’t hate it, but she was super jealous of the tour guide because she got to take all of the cute little kids on a walk and talk about the fun stuff while ellie had to sit behind a desk all day. but after begging her supervisor enough, she’d get promoted to tour guide after the mean old lady who used to do it retired.

and guess what??? the kiddos loved her!!! she always made sure the kids were having a great time and she knew a lot about what she was talking about, whether it was dinosaurs or planets or volcanoes. and the joke book came everywhere with her!! absolutely nothing made her happier than hearing the little monsters giggling and squealing about a joke that wasn’t even that funny.

abby and ellie would become good friends because of the time abby took her class to the museum on a field trip. they ended up actually really liking each other, especially because they had so much in common. and sometimes after work they’d meet up at a bar and talk about life, it was nice for them to both have a new friend who was equally as nerdy.

ellie would be a tour guide for quite a few years while abby got her doctorate. a few years after abby became a professor, ellie tried out illustrating a childrens book for a local visitor at the museum who was really fond of ellie. it was nothing too big, but she was really proud of it.

after she finished the drawings for the book, she wanted to try writing one of her own. so she decided to write a textbook for kids about dinosaurs with her own illustrations and a joke on every page.

safe to say it was super successful!!! she ended up going to local elementary schools and educating the littles about the different types of dinosaurs and each era they lived in. and you better believe old man joel was so proud!!!! his little girl ellie that he used to take to dinosaur museums was now writing her own dinosaur books!!!

i think eventually she’d quit her job at the museum and focus on being a writer full time, along with keeping art as a hobby. and i can 100% see her getting married and adopting a kid just like joel adopted her, and she’d pass on all of her science knowledge to her mini self. also i think she’d mainly only write science textbooks for kids, but may end up publishing a sci-fi novel or two.

i think that’s all :3 thanks for the ask sweetie pie ilysm 🫶

daily click / israeli themes in tlou

#to all the anons who have sent requests i swear i’m not ignoring you on purpose 😭#ellie williams #ellie williams tlou2 #ellie williams tlou #ellie williams x reader #modern!ellie #the last of us

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fumifooms · 7 months

Text

Fleki x Marcille

I dub thee flekille Fourth entry of my “Dunmeshi rarepairs I will birth with my own hands if I have to” series. This one goes really well alongside laicion

Hear me out… Probably one of my most crackpair simply because they never really interact in canon, but it snowballed from me thinking about laicion so many months ago and I genuinely enjoy them a lot on their own now too.

Overview of the appeal: Silly prep girl that tries to not be silly x silly troublemaker that is silly on purpose. Could have been cellmates in another life 😍 /j It’s chaos x order, it’s propriety x will tease you specifically to make you uncomfortable, it’s Fleki sticking around Marcille when she gets the opportunity to because she thinks she’s entertaining, it’s her dragging Marcille to a shitty club that would give anyone epileptic a seizure and Marcille being so out of her depth but finding the thrill intriguing… It’s Fleki’s YOLO attitude rubbing on Marcille a bit, encouraging her to stress less and live more, it’s Marcille looking out for Fleki and teaching her to value her health, her friends and stability in life more. It’s banter, where Fleki is bold and amused and Marcille is panicked and horrified, which as they grow to know each other becomes Fleki teasing and Marcille responds with exasperated but fond comebacks. They have big yuri manga with a bad boy girl vibes, they deserve 50k slow burn rivals to lovers fics exploring the deepest emotional lows imaginable, they deserve cute funny bantery ficlets where they try out rollerskating together and Fleki skates face first into a pole and Marcille heals her up. ALSO it’s the mage who always talks about the importance of hair and braids hers neatly x the mage who keeps her hair long but at MOST brushes it every 3 days and looks feral

We see that Fleki looooves casual physical contact which I think suits Marcille well! Since she’s also big on casual & affectionate physical touches. Oversimplifying it, I kinda see Fleki as a more chaotic and less grumpy Izutsumi, which I think pairs really well with Marcille.

Ok, so the meme + below is my romantic flekille & laicion, qpr laimar & flekion vision… Maybe romantic laimar and flekion too idfc. Fleki’s bestie Lycion and Lycion’s boyfriend Laios and Laios’ girlfriend Marcille and Marcille’s girlfriend Fleki… A bond forged by the shared experience of having a feral partner. In my timeline they start hanging out because laicion starts dating and it goes from there, like they keep showing up at the other’s place to come pick their guy up or when laicion meet up in town at an agreed location both come with their bestie so then as Laios and Lycion head off the girlies just stand there awkwardly for a sec together… And it becomes habit enough that they start talking. One time one arrives early at the other’s place to pick up their dog guy so while she waits on Laios and Lycion being done hanging out they just chat and hit it off around the kitchen table. Eventually maybe they all live together, the girls have a qpr situationship with their respective dog boy too and they all snuggle up together on the couch and life is good… I have a couple of other flekille au ideas though.

The one college au I would EAT UP FR. Anything modern for them is so fun for some reason. They could even have a like… y’know ‘that yuri manga where the prep girl thinks the emo girl’s a boy and she’s interested’ thing (googling it The guy she was interested in wasn’t a guy at all is the name), they feel like they’d have that energy… Except that instead of Fleki being dressed all cool she’s dressed in Minions merch or something. Puke colored tie dye. Marcille cringes but also smth about the cringefail allure has her enraptured (jk it’s mostly Fleki being determinedly clingy) Like come on imagine Fleki with the alpaca trampoline hand tattoo, Marcille would be so endeared. They have the vibes ever, I wanna see them hang out and with Lycion and Laios too

Marcille, seeing this disheveled absolute rascal: … I can fix her.

I made a reblog post that goes into Fleki’s drug addiction a lil for the topic of the ship just so it’s easily avoidable if it’s an uncomfortable topic to some, I don’t go into the details though, just on how it might affect their relationship

#This series is baaack I’ve procrastinated for so long but obscure pairings are so fun to ramble about when you find The Angle #Dunmeshi rarepairs #Rarepair spotlight #Flekille #Fleki #marcille donato #dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #Next up are flamela pattadol and toshimari and uhh i don’t remember who else. I have so much on my plate… Keeping the Toshiro stuff #For after i make a masterpost about his family though #Dunmeshi memes #Marcille x fleki #fleki x marcille #Idk i’ll write for them one day but I def wanna draw them hanging out at the very least #Laios is probably more the shrieks and skitters one tbh… Debate #they’re just conceptually really fun sue me

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sopiao · 1 year

Note

Hii, how are u? idk if you're taking request or something, but I've been having this idea stuck in my mind, about König and task force 141 running to help the reader who is in some troubles during a mission with them, and the reader is singing "I need a hero" while is fighting and hiding while they arrive to help and at the end everything ends well and everybody laughs of the reader singing while was in this big trouble...

I hope u can help me with this but if not is totally ok, have a nice night/day 🍀

i’d be doing better if it wasn’t for studies T_T but tyy for asking!! really hope i was able to write it how u envisioned it to be.

but ODMSHJXS OMG THIS IS SUPER FUNNY.

like the reader using singing to keep them occupied and a way to try and calm them while they’re in trouble. AND THEY CAN HEAR IT ON THE WALKIE BUT THEY CANT LAUGH.

(Callsign will be ‘Shark’ again, just to make it easier instead of always using reader or they pronouns)

Shark was left behind in the safe house, they felt nauseous and seasick after the boat ride. So, they just left them at an empty house to hide while they do the first part of the plan, just scoping the area out and double checking how well the plan will actually go.

Shark was lazily resting on the couch, dirty boots discarded on the floor next to them, with an arm draped over their eyes. Trying not to move too much or look around to make them even more nauseous.

After a couple more minutes of long, deep, breaths and having to stay still for 30 minutes, they felt okay enough to finally breath normally. With nothing left to do they decided to check up on them. Reaching across their chest to their walkie.

“Update?” Shark waited, listening to the white noise.

“Alpha Golf” Shark rolled their eyes at Ghost’s voice, not expecting him to be the one to respond.

“Speak normally. Saying that takes longer than just sayin’ ‘All good’” Of course Shark had to say something, taking every opportunity to nitpick Ghost, and pick at his patience.

“Shut up” They heard back.

“Hallo!” König’s voice rang through, making them smile unconsciously.

“Feelin’ better?” Price’s gruff voice checked in on them.

“You throw up yet?”

“Eww” Soap exaggerated his disgust.

All of their little messages and chiming in made them less bored, better than just staring at the ceiling.

“Oi! You have your own radio!” Ghost’s annoyed voice boomed through their end. Making Shark laugh, they imagined that they were all leaned into Ghost’s chest to talk to them.

“Asshole” Soaps little hushed comment made them laugh even more. He must’ve whispered it in his own walkie, not knowing that they’re all on the same channel so they’d all hear it, including Ghost. They can just imagine the stop-in-tracks and stare from Ghost.

—

“3:10” Shark groan, impatient, it’s been 30 minutes since they last talked to them. They were gonna take a while since it’s quite a distance to get to the site and they had to be extra cautious as to not get caught.

They hummed songs and little snippets of things they hear on the internet to try and pass time. A creak interrupted their own cover of Bruno Mars ‘Treasure’. Shark’s gloved hand immediately flung to their gun, small handgun close to their body as they sat up.

Eyes trailed from their boots to their boots on the floor, then back at the door, then to the hall, back to the door. There wasn’t enough time to get their boots not, not taking the risk.

Three men emerged from their hiding places, all masked, and all armed, unfortunately. Dammit. Shark’s eyes frantically shifted between the three men that slowly closed in on them and then to their surroundings and blocked exit.

“Mother fucka—” Shark decided it was better to take their chances at running away than to be caught and a liability as a hostage, compromising the mission. Spinning on their heel to kick away their gun then elbow the closest man on the neck.

As fast as they can they wrapped their arm around the man’s neck and turned to use his body as a meat shield. Too slow to react and too late to stop the bullets, his teammates fired shots into his chest in a failed attempt to get to Shark.

Immediately booking it to the back door and running into the woods. Cringing at the feeling of twigs and small pebbles that rubbed and poked the bottom of their feet, nothing but the fabric of their socks.

For some reason they were still in that same singy feeling. A nervous tick to try and make their head clearer to make better decisions. Shark started to sing, scat, the doo doo doo’s of the beginning of the famous song awarded for best music moment, Holding Out for a Hero.

The two little ash’s of the song was sung, sorta, when Shark tripped on a thick, fallen, trunk of a tree, and the second played when a bullet flied past them dangerously close to the top of their head. They flipped the switch of their walkie, now’s a good time to alert the others that the empty cabin isn’t safe.

“—FUCK. THERE’S MORE???” Right as they flipped the switch, a different kind of gun fire blasted through the woods, they looked back and saw 5 more goons running after them.

“Shark! Fuck’s happening?!” Price’s voiced yelled through the walkie, almost immediately, responding when the first gunshot rang through the walkies.

“THEY’RE GONNA GET MY ASS. THEY’RE GONNA EAT MY ASS” They were too panicked to properly answer, properly tell them that they were not safe, but I think they got the message through.

Price immediately set his team out, thinking of the best and fastest route to get back. They’ve done enough scoping out for now. Shark just had to hold out on their own for a bit. Still continuing their own performance.

“Where have all the good men gone and where are all the gods?” They continued, finding an abandoned warehouse and running inside, their stalkers following in as well. Their heavy breathing from the running cut through their notes.

“Where’s the streetwise Hercules to fight the rising odds?” When the first soldier came in they took the opportunity to shoot him twice in the knee, they can’t kill them, but they can slow them down. The lyrics came so naturally, they could even hear the background singers in their head.

“Late at night, I toss and I turn and I dream of what I neED! AHH—” They stumble out the half open window, small enough to get through, while the other soldiers have to get back out to continue the chase, leaving their injured soldier back.

The entire time, they left their walkie on, too distracted from the bullets that almost scratched their insides to remember to switch it off. They all could hear it as they ran back to the truck to speed their way back to the lone cabin. They wanted to laugh at how Shark dealed with the situation but felt it was too soon.

“I need a hERO— AGH. I-I’m holdin’ out for a hero ‘till the end of the nIGHT” Shark had to take a sharp turn into the thick woods and hide behind a tree, crouched down, half a minute later the rest of the men followed. By now the saviors had their suspicions that maybe the song chose unconsciously was a subtle message to them to hurry the fuck up.

They were safe for now but it was only a couple minutes until they can see that their trail stopped and they had to retrace it back to them. Shark used their knife to help them climb up the thick trunk of the tree and sit on a high branch, unconsciously hugging the trunk.

“He’s gotta be strong, haah, and he’s gotta be fast, and he’s gotta be fresh from the fight” For some reason they continued to sing, in a way, as a way to calm their breathing and heart beat down, wheezing and gasping in between verses. Very quite and very hushed as to not get caught if the men ever came back. The adrenaline too much, they started to zone out.

—

“There!” Gaz pointed out, running up the ruffled leaves, following the tracks, and finding a single white sock. White cotton sock with a blue stripe along the rim and two pieces of fabric to look like bunny ears, small bunny face on the toe part.

“Shark’s” Soap shook his head, gaining hope after long dread. They started to lose hope after a while since they couldn’t find any trace of Shark. Price motion his hand forward, signaling his team to continue on. Gaz pocketed the sock.

—

The crunching of leaves pulled Shark back to the present, they immediately froze. Unconsciously slowed their breathing and heart pumping faster. They listened to the footsteps and dry leaf crunching getting louder and louder, closer and closer.

“Look! Bunny sock!” König’s voice picked up on Shark’s ears. König’s caught everyone’s attention and pointed up at Shark’s dangling foot with the matching bunny sock. They looked down and saw the five of them looking up at them hugging the spruce wood.

“Christ. Took ya’ long enough” They scoffed, starting to climb down. They were thankful, just putting out some sarcasm after what just happened.

“Don’t worry, Shark. Heros are here” Price teased. Half way down Shark fell back, with enough trust, Price caught Shark with ease. They patted his chest before jumping off and dusting themselves off. They were surprised with his comment. Huh, I was just singing about that. But they dismissed it, wanting to save themselves from embarrassment.

“Guess ya’ didn’t need to hold out until the end of the night” Ghost spoke up, quoting a lyric from the song, to subtly hint Shark that they heard everything.

“What—”

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icallhimjoey · 1 year

Text

That's It

♥ ♥ rockstar!Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Summary: Steve is there to stay, and you fall into a new routine together, the three of you, old buddies back to their old ways. Except, no, this is actually nothing like your old ways, is it?

CW / disclaimer: 18+, language, fem!reader, angst, brief mentions of substance abuse and addiction, mentions of smut, sort of cheating? not really... you'll see

Author’s note: Eddie had good reason to freak out a little over you and Steve getting drunk together. Learn why! Also, we're headed into... new territory. Hope you enjoy!

Wordcount: 6.2K

(find all other parts of this story here)

You were shocked awake because Steve jolted. Spazzed like he dreamt he was about to fall off a cliff.

It immediately made you very aware of how your bodies were positioned; you on your side, facing the back of the couch, leaning into the little crevice of darkness that it created. And Steve was on his back, right alongside you, and he had you in the crook of his arm, your head on his bicep as the rest of it curled around the front of your shoulders. Like you'd been spooning, but the spoon had fallen open.

You felt how the alcohol consumption of the night before had affected your body, but wanted to ignore it. To sleep more. Steve was pleasantly warm and the couch was comfy, but Steve had jolted in shock and immediately moved to sit up. However, just as quick as he’d awoken, he was coaxed back down by Eddie’s whispering voice.

“Shh shh, no it’s OK, sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,”

You felt Steve move slightly, and it felt like he checked on you before he relaxed back into his position.

“Hung over?”

“Hmh,” was all Steve managed.

He felt awful.

So did Eddie, though.

“What time is it?” Steve whispered, his voice barely there. “It’s light out.”

You heard Eddie chuckle softly and knew he had probably sat down on the coffee table, like he would sometimes do when you were pulling yourself out of a nap and he had to put his shoes on before heading out somewhere.

“It’s just past 7, sorry,”

You heard Steve try to say, “Sorry about last night,” through a yawn, but Eddie was quick to dismiss him.

“No, don’t,” Eddie whispered, “I didn’t– you did nothing wrong, I just freaked out,”

“I shouldn’t have taken her to–”

Steve stopped talking. You didn’t hear why, but imagined either Eddie held up a hand or made a face.

They both knew you. There was no need for Steve to lie about who had taken who to a bar.

“Ok but... this was my fault,” you felt Steve shake a little, and pictured it was his other hand gesturing from you to himself a couple of times.

“Honestly,” Eddie whispered, pausing a second before carrying on, “I’m glad she didn’t have to sleep alone,”

Pretending to sleep became more difficult by the second.

“I scared myself and didn’t know if I could... I didn’t know how to face it,” Eddie explained, but Steve stayed silent.

“It’s so fucked up, and I really didn’t expect it, because when you called, it was funny to me – I was glad to know where you were, because, you weren’t here when I got back, and then I didn’t hear from you for the rest of the day,”

Yeah, you should’ve at least maybe called him beforehand. Let him know where you were at. How long you were going to be.

“And it was funny, you were–” Eddie stopped to huff a laugh through his nostrils as quietly as he could manage it. “You were slurring, like, I’ve not heard you talk like that since we were... what, twenty? Twenty-one?”

You remembered times where Steve and Eddie used to get high together on bad weed, two lanky teens who didn't know how to talk to girls without hurting their own feelings, and then they would go see a movie where they’d come to buy popcorn from you, and you had to pretend to take their money before you just gave it back to them in change.

Then after they’d napped in their seats and missed most of whatever movie they hadn't paid money to see, they would stay to clean up all the popcorn they’d spilled and would wait out your shift to go out together.

Man, you used to go out and drink together, all three of you, all of the time. That really seemed like a lifetime ago.

“But then when I saw you – her, mostly when I saw her, I really scared myself,” Eddie continued whispering.

You felt your throat tighten and laid as still as you could still. Tried to focus on your breathing.

“I really wanted to kiss her,”

Oh.

That wasn’t what you expected.

“Just to get a taste myself,”

Ah.

That sounded more like it.

Awful. Obviously, this was awful. But it made sense to you.

Eddie shutting you out and leaving you to fend for yourself with Steve’s help made sense given Eddie’s history. You disliked everything about the reality of the situation, but you appreciated the logic. It settled within your system fast, and you hardly reacted to it. Immediately thought of how this was something that needed rules and talking through and for you to keep in mind for the future.

“It’s so gross, she threw up, and I just wanted to kiss her more,” Eddie whispered, and you could hear he almost made himself stop talking just before the confession. Then he said, “Sorry,” and you thought maybe Steve was grimacing at the visual.

“But those are my issues, man. ‘S got nothing to do with you, and you looked like you needed a fucking drink yesterday,” Eddie’s voice had shifted from whisper to a low, hushed baritone.

Your hip started hurting from laying on it so still for so long, but you didn’t want to interrupt the boys, so you decided to bear it for as long as you could.

“You okay?”

Steve sighed, and you heard his hand fall onto his leg, or maybe his stomach, with a soft slap.

“I’m getting a divorce,” Steve spoke softly, now also not whispering anymore.

“What?”

“Yea, it’s... I don’t know, looking back, I honestly have no idea what I was thinking,”

You were glad your back was turned and neither of them could see your face as it frowned deeply.

“I thought I could make it,” Steve said, and it got followed by a silence.

This is also what Steve had said to you, but he hadn’t elaborated then.

“I thought that if I tried to see someone through eyes, through this different lens, that I could just... I don’t know how to explain it without sounding stupid,”

“Story of your life,”

They both snickered a little. Boys. Idiots. It made enough noise for you to stir a little. For your throat to escape a small little noise. Steve froze immediately, breaths were held, and the room got overtaken by silence.

They were trying not to wake you. After shifting enough to get more comfortable on your hip, you sighed deeply and relaxed again. It occurred to you that maybe it was strange that you were asleep in Steve’s arms – not curled into him, or too on top of him, but, this had every potential to be weird. Especially with Eddie sat on the coffee table, talking to the boy that held you as you slept.

Except, it wasn’t weird.

It was nice. Felt natural. You were just you, Steve and Eddie. The forever tripod. You’d fallen asleep in between Eddie and Steve plenty of times, so it had never really been weird. You just hadn’t expected it to still feel so normal now that you were all either already or almost thirty years old.

And, you know, married. Steve, at least.

When enough seconds of you not moving had passed, their conversation resumed.

“This doesn’t help,” Steve said, now back to whispering again and you could hear the humour in his voice. “The expectations you’ve set are too high, man,” Steve complained.

“What do you mean?” Eddie sounded genuinely confused.

“Being around the two of you for so long? It’s set the bar too high,” Steve huffed another soft laugh, but Eddie didn’t join him.

“Are you... Steve are you jealous?”

You felt Steve attempt a shrug, and your cheeks flushed at the idea of Steve being jealous of the relationship you had with Eddie. It somehow made your heart swell for Eddie because you loved him so, and you felt a little proud of that fact that you fit together so nicely. It took a lot of work, and it surely hadn’t been easy, but you both put in effort and now Steve was jealous of it.

But it also made you feel insanely guilty. Made you want to just be friends, the three of you, for a little bit. Pretend that it was all just platonic, and Steve had nothing to be jealous about.

“Wow,” you heard Eddie get up and take a few steps. “Steve Harrington? Jealous of little old Eddie Munson?”

Oh no. Eddie was going milk this for years.

“Okay,” Steve regretted even bringing it up. “It’s not like that,” he backtracked, but Eddie wasn’t having it and you knew exactly what smug little expression he was currently wearing.

“No, no, I get it, I mean, look around. Got the big house, the cars, the job, the–”

“The pinball machines,” Steve added.

“The pinball machines, did you– did she play you?”

“She did,”

You weren't even facing him, had both your eyes closed, pretended to be fast asleep still, but you could feel Eddie grin. Knew he loved it when you showed interest in whatever his current hyperfixation was.

“Man… I really do have it all, don’t I?” Eddie softly mused, almost sounding a little shy. Bashful. Like he couldn't believe his luck and having Steve confess he was jealous of him kind of brought it all into perspective for him.

“Got the girl,” Steve added, leaving his tone up as if to continue the list that Eddie had started.

But Eddie didn’t continue the game, and instead repeated, “Got the girl.” definitively.

That was the end of the list.

Even though there were many more things to be added, like the band, the support he needed from his label, the creative freedom he felt in collaboration with his producers, the mental clarity he'd always be left with after speaking to his therapist, or the way he'd feel like he could concur the world after an AA meeting – all of these things were important, but the girl was the most important. The thing that really mattered.

With full attention on you, you held your breath in anticipation of what was going to be said next.

“Got the best, the kindest, sweetest, hottest, sexiest, ugh,” Eddie groaned, and Steve chuckled at the theatrics. “So talented, so supportive, so smart, so beautiful, and so… so awake right now,”

Fuck.

“So, so, so very awake,”

Yeah. You'd been caught out.

You felt two hands squeeze you, and you flinched at the sudden contact. Eddie leaned over Steve and found your face to press a kiss onto, making you hum in acknowledgement.

“How long you been awake for, huh?” Eddie cooed into your ear, and you turned over a little to face him.

“The whole time,” you confessed with a sleepy smile, and you felt Steve tighten his grip on your shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” Eddie whispered, knowing you understood what the apology was for, and followed it with a kiss to your lips. Several. More until he got your teeth because you couldn't help but laugh a little awkwardly.

You were on top of Steve and Eddie was kissing you, and with Steve just having confessed he was jealous of whatever you and Eddie had, it felt a little like shoving things into his face.

“That’s OK,” you dismissed it and moved to sit up. Thought you could talk about it later when your body wasn’t pressed into Steve’s.

You turned to look at Steve, gave a slight smile as you squinted and offered, “Breakfast?”

It had been a while since you'd seen Eddie be useful in the kitchen. Ever since you'd moved to LA and he'd hired chefs to come and do all the work for you, he'd barely touched the stove to begin with.

When you wanted to get up to help out, both boys refused and turned you away. Said you could just sit and drink your coffee, or, as Eddie suggested, go brush your hair since you'd just let it get wet in the shower last night and hadn't touched it after.

You commented, “You go brush your hair,” jokingly glaring at Eddie, but were already on your way out because he was right, your hair was a whole bird's nest that needed tending to.

When you returned, looking a little more presentable than before, Eddie and Steve had been joined by the personal chef who was teaching Steve how to do things.

Huh.

That had never occurred to you.

Eddie had hired all these people to take every single job out of your hands... but you could've just... done them with them. Joined in. Learned from them.

You knew Eddie probably also wouldn't like you doing that, hiring people to do jobs and then having you do them with them wasn't exactly the point, but seeing the chef teach Steve how to hold a knife properly opened a bunch of doors inside your mind.

“Don’t even think about it,” Eddie snuck up behind you, and Jesus fucking Christ, had he turned into some sort of mind reader? Or was the hungover version of you just that easy to read, somehow?

“Eddie,” you tried.

“Nope.” he shot you down immediately, his hand trailing over your lower stomach. He kept it there a second. There, where all the important things were stored, and you got it. Got what he meant.

Okay.

This could be another thing you were going to talk about later when Steve wasn't in the room with you. You understood why Eddie wanted you relaxed. Free of burden. Mind at complete ease, no stress, no worries, no nothing.

You got it.

But you also thought Eddie was taking it a little too far, maybe.

Over breakfast, Steve asked if it was okay if he would really stay for a month. When he had mentioned that the day before, he hadn't been joking. Apparently he'd gotten all the paperwork signed for his divorce and had immediately gone to catch a flight afterwards. “Got it done, and got out,” he said and he kind of laughed to hide the hurt. Of course he could stay for a month - hell, Eddie said, stay for fucking ever, he didn't mind, and neither did you. The guest room Steve used would just be Steve's room now. He was free to use your house as his own - no problem.

Steve mentioned rent, but Eddie swiped it off the table immediately. When Eddie didn't look, Steve signed and made eyes and you knew he meant, we'll figure something out behind his back. And you did. Steve had savings and even though you didn't want him to pay you for his stay, he said he'd feel bad if he'd freeload.

Eddie had his moment alone with you, told you other reasons why he spiraled after seeing you drunk, and you'd unnecessarily apologised a million times. Because what if you had been...? You weren't. You knew you weren't. But what if you had been? Eddie hugged you for long, and then asked, “No ragrets?” in a silly voice and you smiled through a sniffle and answered, “No ragrets!” in an almost upbeat scream - an inside joke that would never get old, that instantly lightened the mood every time.

Steve made himself useful. Became friends with every single person that set foot into the house. Let the chef teach him about cooking every single day. Learned how to clean a pool properly, how pool pH levels worked and stuff. Got to learn about various gardening tools and what plants were planted where and why, because of the sun and the shade and the position of the house and Steve loved it. Really kept himself busy.

You loved it too.

You still had Eddie's agenda to fret over, and with the upcoming release of a new album, there was lots to keep track off, but there was still a lot of free time, and now you had a buddy to spend it with whenever Eddie would be busy.

You took Steve hiking a lot, and Steve would challenge you to lap races in the pool all the time. You went to see the secret Corroded Coffin shows together and wouldn't be stuck by the side of the stage, but would be in the crowd with Steve. Mingling with fans. They'd come up to say hi, and Steve was an expert in exuding that's-enough-vibes and rounding-off-conversations-with-a-smile. Eventually you'd be left alone and you'd get to watch the band play fan-favorites and test out new songs.

For a few weeks, a new routine had settled into your system, and the new routine merged with one old one; sex every other night.

Eddie had looked it up and had shown you, “See, not every night. Every other night. Got to give my swimmers a break, give them a moment to collect themselves and listen to their trainers before I shoot them off to find the target,” Eddie had said, using his hands to really paint the picture of sperm cells swimming with laser focus.

“Wow, you really know how to make this romantic,” you'd joked, and Eddie had stored that comment away in his to-remember box inside his head, because every single every-other-night, he'd known exactly what to do to make it special. To get you in the mood within an instant.

Sometimes it was cliché shit, like rose petals and candle light and soft music and massage oil in hotel rooms.

Other times it was soft and slow touches on the couch that played and teased and wouldn't progress until you'd sling a leg over him to take matters into your own hands.

Sometimes it was hot shower sex.

Sometimes it'd be a quickie on a lounger out by the pool.

And sometimes, Eddie turned the insecure days and turned them into the best days and he'd try to start something on a day in between and you'd be like, “Every other day, Ed,” and he'd whisper something like, “I'm keeping my guys inside, don't worry,” and it'd just be all about you for a few hours.

You'd been going for months.

And every single pregnancy test you'd ever taken had come out negative.

It was a slap in the face every time, so after a while, you stopped doing them, because you'd rather wait until you'd missed two periods entirely than have a little piece of plastic ruin a full week of your life again.

“Let's not worry about it,” Eddie would always say. “Let's just have fun.”

You'd agreed on a year of just trying. Seeing what would happen. Just going with the flow. A full year, and if a full year of unprotected sex still wouldn't have done the trick, you'd go see a doctor together.

Eddie was a rock. Your rock.

But he'd also say things like, “You need to relax more,” and, “You can't overthink, you'll just stress yourself out,” whilst simultaneously beating himself over the head, because he was failing, wasn't he? Not able to get his girl the baby she wanted. That was on him. Of course it was.

But that was a difficult truth to face.

“Let's just have fun.”

And so fun you had.

Loud fun.

It took Steve two weeks to make a comment about being kept awake most nights.

“So um... you've got excellent stamina, I hear,” Steve tried subtly over breakfast one morning, speaking into his coffee mug before taking a sip. Eddie immediately understood what he meant and couldn't help the shit-eating grin that spread across his face.

“Damn right I do,” Eddie said, shoveling a spoonful of cornflakes into his mouth before reaching over to squeeze your shoulder.

It took you a little longer to get it.

“Kind of have to with this one,” Eddie said, head rolling back to smirk at Steve, and Steve seemed a little uncomfortable, but not crazy awkward. There was humour there, but it was something you were missing, so you frowned at their interaction and narrowed your eyes suspiciously.

“And on a tight schedule too,” Steve commented, getting up from his seat and making his way over to the coffee pot for a refill. “Every other day?”

You were just about to have a sip of coffee, but you choked on it and sprayed it right from your mug into your face.

Horrified.

Oh my God.

No!

“Babe,” Eddie moved in with some kitchen roll, laughing, but you'd already hidden your face into the crook of your elbow resting on the table.

“You can hear us?” you'd never been more mortified in your life.

Now, listen.

You didn't care about Eddie's band members hearing you get a little too cozy in one of the bunks on the tourbus at all.

You didn't care that they would comment on it whilst it was happening - that had only just made you giggle and had made Eddie grip onto you tighter.

You didn't care that the pool guy had walked in on you naked in the pool once - mostly because you'd been wrapped around Eddie's and so you'd had all of your bits covered. But you didn't care about being caught like that, and hadn't cared when Eddie had shouted, “Sorry, dude, give us twenty minutes and this space is all yours,” through a smile.

But Steve?!

Steve trying to get some peaceful sleep in your guest room whilst he was going through a divorce being kept awake deep into early hours because he could hear you being fucked into the mattress by Eddie?!

No, no, no, no - no!

“You. He can hear you.” Eddie made it worse, and you shot eyes towards Steve by the coffee machine who sort of... nodded, apologetically so, but he was having way too much fun making you go through it, and you wanted to die.

“Oh, God,” you groaned, face covered with both your hands as you tried to process the humiliation.

“No, it's more like, oh, oh, God, fuck, Eddie,”

You launched yourself at Eddie to make him shut up, spilling more coffee in the process of climbing onto his lap, grabbing at his head until you had his mouth covered with one and his eyes with the other.

“Steve, you're moving into the downstairs guest room,” you stated matter of factly.

“Yea, 'cause she's not going to quiet down, she's not–” Eddie spoke through your fingers until you shut him up with a kiss, the only thing that would really make him stop talking.

“Capable,” Eddie finished with a stupid grin once you pulled back.

“No, it's okay, your housekeeper left me earplugs,”

Cool.

So the housekeeper knew too.

Great.

Life was so great, wasn't it?

Ugh. Fucking hell.

You were going to bury yourself alive that afternoon, you decided. And you'd make Eddie help you out.

“No ragrets?” Eddie asked softly when you got up from his lap, and you sighed, “No ragrets,” back in response. Eddie looked at you a little pleadingly, and then shot eyes towards Steve who sat back down with a full mug of steaming coffee before he looked back at you.

Eddie was asking if he could tell Steve.

You hadn't told anyone. You barely liked talking about it outside of the upstairs bathroom, where you'd initially had talked to Eddie about wanting a baby, maybe, and where Eddie had promised to put one inside of you right that second. It was also where you'd taken every single pregnancy test you'd ever taken, and it felt like that room had become the one place where you got to sit inside your feelings about it not working out. The second you'd leave it, you'd step back into the day, into reality, where there were meetings to be had and there was music to be made.

“No ragrets.” you said again, sweeter and softer this time as you answered Eddie's unspoken question, but leaving the room as you did.

Eddie could tell Steve without you there.

You don't know why it felt so weird to you, but you felt embarrassed enough as it was and wanted to go for a shower anyway.

Steve didn't look at you weird after. Didn't bring it up either, which was nice. He was just his same old self when you sat around the pool and talked about Robin together, you with a foot in the water as you sat on the edge, both boys spread out on loungers

“She says they're not really together, that it's more of a friends with benefits situation... but, they're basically dating, anyway,” Steve explained.

“She deserves the best fucking girlfriend in the world,” you said, and Steve grimaced a little, and said, “This might not be her,”

“So, friends with benefits it'll be, then,” Eddie chimed in, but immediately chuckled after. “I'm saying that like I get to decide,”

“Can Robin not come out here too for a bit?” you asked.

Steve just shrugged, unsure if he really needed Robin all up in his business about his divorce right now. You and Eddie had been exactly what he needed in the fact that you never brought it up. Pretended it wasn't even happening somewhere in the background of Steve's life, even though it was definitely happening right up in the forefront of it.

“Do we know anyone? Can we set her up?” you asked Eddie, who replied with a shrug as well.

These boys were of no help to you.

“Friends with benefits,” Eddie mused after taking another drag of his cigarette. “If you think about it, Steve is sort of our friend with benefits,”

Eddie was about to say something stupid to embarrass you again, wasn't he?

“Or wait,” Eddie retracted. “We are Steve's friends with benefits,”

Oh, God. You were already groaning.

“But the benefits aren't exactly sexy, he just... gets to stay here,” Eddie laughed, and you sighed a breath of relief. Saw Steve drop tension from his face too.

“Maybe not friends with benefits,” Steve chimed in. “But definitely more than just friends I'd say, no?”

“Steve,” Eddie grabbed Steve's shoulder, clearly ready to make fun of the dumb thing Steve just said, already laughing.

“Like, family, you idiot,” Steve argued, making Eddie's laugh burst and you couldn't help but chuckle at the two of them.

Just two friends in the sun who didn't know how to describe what they really were to each other. It felt sort of endearing.

“It's stupid that more than friends immediately means romantic, doesn't it?” you thought out loud whilst looking at your foot that swirled in the water.

Having a pool in a warm climate was so nice.

You were so blessed and this was one of those moments where you could really feel it in your bones. Sun on your back. Foot in the water. Eddie there. Steve there.

Blessed.

“I'd say we're more than friends,” Eddie agreed.

You looked at Steve who quickly looked away from you, like he'd been caught staring, and said, “Definitely.”

And that had left you feeling a little funny.

Not that you had much time to dwell over it.

“We definitely are more than friends,” Eddie had said pointing a finger straight at you as he got up, and before you knew it, Eddie was flying over you, monster diving into the pool and splashing you where you were sat.

You were just about to scold Eddie for jumping into the water in his clothes when he pulled you in by the foot. You didn't stand a fucking chance, you were in and under within a fraction of a second.

“Get in, Harrington,” Eddie called when you found your feet and came up sputtering.

Before you'd even gotten the hair from your face, Steve's cannon ball splashed a new wave right into your face. You used your hands to splash back, ducked under water and came back up face first, hair all dragged out of your face, and saw Eddie smile and jump to swim away quicker from Steve who seemed ready to fight him on something.

“It's so fun being thirty,” you pointed out dryly, because this was quite honestly ridiculous.

“Thirty-one,” Eddie corrected as he fled towards the other side of the pool from Steve who'd started the chase and fucking hell, yes he was thirty-one, but look at him.

Them.

Look at them.

Chasing each other in a pool in full outfits because one probably said something silly about the other and now it was time for pay back in the form of repeated dunks under water.

Children.

These were little children you were watching.

Fuck, you loved them so much.

Blessed.

You were quick to climb out of the pool, quick to leave the boys to play whilst you slipped inside and left wet clothes by the door before you went to find a towel and a dry outfit to change into.

When you stepped back out with a pile of towels, Eddie called, “No ragrets!” and you huffed a laugh at the confused face Steve gave just before Eddie jumped up and pushed him down and under by the shoulders.

“Okay, I gotta ask,” Steve said after he'd come back up, now swimming towards the edge closest to where you sat down on a lounger.

“You do realise you keep pronouncing regrets wrong, right?”

Eddie made eye-contact with you before he threw his shirt onto the tiles besides the pool which landed with a wet slap.

“You tell the story,” Eddie said, because he didn't know how to tell it without sounding like an arrogant asshole and a huge dumbass at the same time. He pushed off the edge whilst Steve climbed on top.

“So,” you started, unable to hide your smile. This was a fun story. “One time after a gig, you know how sometimes fans wait by stage door? This time, there were maybe eight people, small little group, but one of them was this huge dude. Massive tree trunk of a guy, a real unit, covered in tattoos, head to toe, but he was squealing like a nine year-old girl about to meet The Backstreet Boys,”

“She's not exaggerating,” Eddie called from the other side of the pool, now floating on his back in just his jeans, soaking up the sun. Meanwhile Steve was wringing out his T-shirt before moving to come sit next to you on the lounger, using the other to spread his T-shirt out to let it the sun dry it.

“And he's telling Eddie all about how he loves Corroded Coffin, loves them so much, that he's seen at least seventeen shows, and he asks Eddie to sign his arm,”

“I found the one empty spot between all the tats, just large enough for a signature and a little message,”

“But Eddie's talking, and saying that he must have spent a fortune on concert tickets, and this guy goes, no regrets, man,”

“No regrets!” Eddie shouted, one arm up in the air, making you giggle.

“So Eddie writes, no regrets, signs the arm and that's that... but then, like, three weeks later? Three weeks later Eddie meets this guy at another show and he's gotten it tattooed,”

“Oh no,” Steve caught on. Knew where this was going.

“Yep. He showed Eddie, all proud,”

“Your dyslexic ass, you wrote no ragrets?!” Steve was shocked.

“No ragrets!” Eddie shouted again, louder this time, that same arm punching the air again, making the both of you laugh.

“Now it's a thing.”

With Steve in on the joke now, the conversation naturally went onto other stupid shit Eddie had written in the past. Like when he'd misspelled his own name when he'd tried to do a cool graffiti drawing of it in class that one time. Or when he'd written his own sick note, and the office had called Wayne to verify that Eddie really did have diehareeyah.

Eddie fired back, mentioned stupid shit Steve had done before, like trying to climb out of a window that was right next to an open door to not be caught by Wayne after having secretly smoked weed with Eddie. Or how he'd once fallen asleep at the movies, like he always fucking did, and had tried to roll over like he was in bed and had promptly fallen out of the seat, right onto the floor, where he just continued his slumber.

Or what about you, when you...

Eddie and Steve looked at each other, and Eddie frowned a little.

“When you...” he thought a second longer, then shook his head. “Shit babe... what's something embarrassing you've done?”

“Why can't I think of anything?” Steve had his eyes narrowed at you.

You just smirked.

There was plenty of embarrassing shit you'd done, but you were glad none of it had stuck with them.

“There isn't anything, I'm perfect.” you joked, feigning a casual confident shrug.

You expected them to fight you on it, but instead Eddie said, “She's right.” and you gave him a nose-scrunch which he immediately returned.

What a guy. So sappy.

You loved it.

Steve announced he was also going to get out of his wet clothes, and you were reminded you had just left yours in a wet pile by the door. And so, as Steve went inside to dry off, you went inside to collect wet clothing items for the laundry.

Upstairs, you called for Steve to put whatever clothes he had into the open washing machine, expecting him to do so once you'd left.

Instead, Steve walked out of his room, wet clothes in hand, and his wet underwear practically transparent.

That was his full penis.

Shit.

You pretended not to see. Maybe Steve didn't know he was on show like that.

“Oh, thanks,” you avoided any and all contact as Steve dropped his clothes in and you prepared it for a cycle. Kept your eyes and hands busy with detergent and fabric softener and you expected that by the time you'd have turned the machine on, Steve would be behind the closed door of is bedroom.

But instead, he stayed put beside you.

“Hey, um,”

Oh no.

“Eddie... Eddie told me that you were trying to get pregnant,”

Steve your full dick's out, you thought, but just nodded.

“And that it's not... going well? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable this morning,”

Steve you're making me uncomfortable right now, you though, but just said, “No, don'y worry about it, you're good,”

“I don't know, I felt bad anyway. Can't be easy.”

It wasn't. It was very difficult, in fact.

But talking to Steve who had his own equivalent of a wet T-shirt contest going on right beside you was even more difficult.

You guessed Steve saw you grow more uneasy by the second, saw you avoid any and all contact as you rushed to turn the washing machine on, because what he did next made you freeze on the spot.

“Hey, come here,”

Steve reached a hand, touched your shoulder and turned you towards him before he bent down to hug you.

Steve was stood in a wet pair of boxers that showcased his penis perfectly and hugged you because his best friend wasn't successful at knocking you up.

What the fuck was going on?

You didn't hug back, held your arms straight down by your sides, and Steve mistook it for something else being wrong.

“Oh, honey,” Steve hugged tighter and then, just before he pulled back entirely, he pressed a kiss to your cheek.

That's what you told yourself.

Just a kiss to the cheek.

Friends could kiss friends on the cheek.

Friends kissed friends on the cheek all the time.

You ignored how it touched the corner of your mouth.

You ignored how it lingered there for a little too long, and when Steve broke it, his lips stayed close for a few seconds longer. Too close. Nose nuzzling close.

You ignored how neither of you had pulled away. How the air had suddenly become tense in a different way. How Steve's hold on you suddenly felt electric and on fire and you couldn't help the thick swallow that followed, even though it was just a kiss to your cheek.

Steve loosened his grip, and in a dumb stroke of whatever the fuck came over you, you grabbed his arm and held his in place. Around you. Where you wanted it.

Eye-contact.

Oh no.

This was it.

You couldn't help the way your eyes shot down at Steve's lips, and you knew that Steve noticed. Knew that he must have seen that.

More than friends echoed in your mind. Steve had said that. And you'd agreed.

You moved like you were about to kiss, heads tilting and moving in, but then you stopped. You both stopped.

Good, you thought. Smart.

But your breath shuddered, and then Steve inhaled deeply and softly said, "No regrets," the normal way before he backed away turned and slipped into his room.

Oh fuck.

Shit.

That was it.

Regrets.

Yes regrets.

Future regrets that you could see on the horizon. Staring at you. They were everywhere. Regrets fucking everywhere.

---

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#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson fic #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson angst #eddie munsons fluff #eddie x y/n #stranger things 4 #joe quinn #joseph quinn #steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fanfic #that's it

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