#they will never fucking understand
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I fell to my knees crying and silently screaming, and holding my hair like a madwoman, and I curled up on the floor, and then I stopped, got up, and laughed at my reflection. Can't take it anymore, huh? How many times have we said that?
#mental health#please help#deep thoughts#i dont know#whats the point#i dont understand#life is hard#help#life is shit#daily life#i think im insane#im losing my mind#im insane#i feel crazy#this hurts#im in pain#no one knows#my head is about to explode#no one understands#no one will ever understand#they will never fucking understand
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enough about taylor swift already. reblog and tag the smallest, least known artist you listen to
#txt#put your energy where it'll make a difference#i have not and will never be silent about sperling but they are not the smallest in my library#it might be Dachs - which is swiss!#and i love that for me because i understand fuck all it's all just vibes to me#and the vibes are great#muted post
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#meme#if you dont understand this you probably have really boring shitty sex#not sorry#oml one of my stupid vanilla friends is arguing with me about this#he says because top and dom usually coexist means theyre basicslly synonymous#no#hes dumb and if he didnt live in canada id punch him#thank god i never fucked this guy it would be so boring
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Blitzøs entire life spent being unwanted. So he adapted, and learned how to be something needed, something to be used.
Which is why I think he firmly believes he is being used by Stolas. He simply cannot fathom a different reality, one in which he is wanted for once in his life.
#if you get it you get it#I don’t understand how Blitzo haters don’t get it#he’s complex and he fucks up but it’s because he cannot fathom being genuinely wanted and loved by someone#since he has never felt genuinely loved or wanted#and the few people who maybe made him feel that way#he ruined their lives#I’m writing a fanfic currently with this concept if anyone’s interested lmao#stolitz#helluva boss#stolas#blitzo#hellaverse#helluva blitzo#helluva boss blitz#helluva boss trailer#blitzo x stolas#hazbin hotel#imp#imp helluva boss#blitzo buckzo#protective blitz#protective blitzo
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“People are inherently terrible” no!!! Have you ever seen a child wait for their friend while they tie their shoelaces? Have you ever known someone who would bring hurt squirrels and rabbits and mice to the nearest vet just so it doesn’t suffer? Have you seen someone grieve? Have you ever read something that hit your heart like a freight train? Have you looked at the stars and felt an unexplainable joy? Have you ever baked bread? Have you shared a meal with a friend? Have you not seen it? All the love? All the good? I know it’s hard to see sometimes, I know there’s pain everywhere. But look, there’s a child helping another up after a hard fall. Look, there’s someone giving their umbrella to a stranger. Look, there’s someone admiring the spring flowers. Look, there’s good, there’s good, there’s good. Look!!!!
#humans are good actually#humans are strange#hopecore#honey prose#respectfully do not fill my mentions w Christianity references this is NOT a capital G god friendly post#fuck the concept of original sin and also Thomas Hobbes#also for all the vet ppl in the tags saying don’t take a wild animal to the vet pls refer to ‘just so it doesn’t suffer’ IM A VET TECH.#THERE IS ONLY ONE THING WE CAN DO FOR A SMALL WILD ANIMAL THAT IS INJURED .#I’m talking about humane euthanasia for a creature that is clearly suffering when there’s no wildlife conservation for 60+ miles#I’ve actually never had a client that didn’t call to ask to bring it in that didn’t already know and understand euthanasia was all we’d be#able to do.#that’s the kindness part. that’s the love. ‘I can’t do anything except make sure you don’t suffer any longer than u already have since some#asshole ran over your back legs’
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not "i ship these characters" or "i want them to bond platonically" but a secret 3rd thing (I want them to be forced to interact by the Narrative bc they would HATE that)
#who needs romance when i can watch two narrative foils painfully tolerate each other's existence#bonus points if they are forced to Work Together To Solve A Problem#and they end up working surprisingly well together!#they make a surprisingly effective team!#they even confide some backstory with each other & bond a bit & understand each other better#and when it's all over they shake hands & amicably agree that they still cannot fucking stand each other#'this was an interesting sidequest & I'm glad we got to experience it.#but all things considered i genuinely never want to see your face again'#Enemies to Chained-Up-In-An-Abandoned-Bathroom-Together#to Enemies#two stray cats forced to share a cat carrier for a trip to the vet
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i hope everyone in nintendo’s management department dies and goes to hell no matter what and i’m not kidding
#WERE LOSING YUZU AND CITRA. I DONT KNOW IF YOU ALL UNDERSTAND HOW INSANE THIS IS#game emulation enables piracy yes but it’s also an INCREDIBLY powerful archival tool.#there are plenty of games out there that only exist in their original formats due to emulation.#this lawsuit has HORRIBLE implications for video game history. it makes it incredibly easy for companies to scorched earth their products#if they’re not profitable enough. ART IS GOING TO BE LOST BECAUSE OF THIS. GAMES PEOPLE WORKED INCREDIBLY HARD ON#it won’t just happen to bad games. it won’t just happen to old games. they will use this to keep their remake/virtual console model going#forever and you will never be able to play your favorite games in their true original forms ever again.#i am fucking INSANELY mad rn. capitalism is the death of art fr#personal
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the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.
#i can't believe i'm saying this#DEADPOOL CAN GET IT#Logan I'm sobbing I understand why you lunged at him#I would too bestie#it's the sass for me folks#paint that car white as much as they painted it red my god#a deadpool thirst post? from me? more likely than you'd think#this is a branch in realities i know it#i've never had Feelings for this motherfucker until this movie#all i'm left with is anger now because WHAT DOES HE WANT FROM ME#camera crew could have just made it landscape but noooooo they had to do a medium shot of this son of a bitch#i'm sending an especially affectionate fuck you in ryan reynolds' direction#i love how you love deadpool#deadpool#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#poolverine#deadclaws#don't get me wrong i've always adored deadpool's personality. nobody's that hilarious and not have humongous balls i mean trauma.#but i've never went 'why he kinda' until this specific shot right here#@ camera crew why the fuck did you zoom in? WHY?#for me? well it's infuriating#do it again#gif is credit to the owner#30 tags aren't enough for me to dismantle how this shot made me feel. tumblr you gotta update#damn tumblr i'm tryna feed a village here#guys just find my other post
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palestine is in a complete and utter blackout with israel launching hundreds of its heaviest airstrikes so far across gaza. this is a mass slaughter and we won't even know the extent of the casualties until it's over; israel have cut off telecommunications so they can commit their atrocities in the dark. there is a genocide happening right in front of our eyes and every person who has ever defended israel's "right to defend itself" has the blood of palestinians on their hands. we cannot ignore what is one of the most devastating massacres in human history.
#i don't even have the words ive never felt this sick to my stomach before#and people are just posting abt their fucking halloween costumes or a new album drop like im sorry but i cant even understand how#anyone can possibly not care about whats going on.#palestine#free palestine
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#all of these cops are on their way to brutalize university students protesting genocide btw.#ACAB#all of this just to keep investing in israel.#I’ll never fucking understand it#but yknow. vote blue no matter who right.#palestine#free palestine#free gaza#free west bank#us politics#columbia university
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i have a special hatred for liberal zionists who say "you're not helping Palestinians" and pretending to advocate for us. keep our names out of your mouth. you do not speak for us. only talking about how you feel victimized while we watch people die of bombardment and starvation. i would rather you admit your selfishness than for you to pretend to care about us only to use us for your own self interests.
#palestine#no actually fuck you and your indigeniety arguments i fucking hate you and you speak about things you don't even understand#fuck you#fuck you!#you've never seriously examined racism/race in your life and it shows#fuck yall#fight for palestinians right to life before you fight for your “right” to stolen land.
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its always “we should beat up and kill rapists and abusers!” but the moment someone actually does you all turn on them
#gypsy rose blanchard#amber heard#menendez brothers#lyle menendez#erik menendez#because i am SICK and TIRED of it#its always “why didn’t they fight back?” until they do#you will never understand what it’s like to be a victim of abuse until you are one#so don’t speak on it#and even when they do everything “right”#when they go to police and leave them and keep their distance#they are still victimised and end up dead. just look at nicole brown#anyways fuck johnny depp fuck deedee blanchard and fuck the menendez parents
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sometimes everything just sucks real real real bad
#bonnie my beloved perceptive no filter bonnie my fucking beloved#divorce ass fucking ship dynamic. you are upsetting the fucking children.#isat spoilers#isat fanart#isat#in stars and time fanart#in stars and time spoilers#in stars and time#isat bonnie#isat siffrin#isat loop#siffrin#lucabyteart#sifloop#YES THIS GOES IN THE SHIP TAG. DIVORCE DIVORCE DIVORCE#anyway i have a lot of thoughts on loop and bonnie as im sure does everyone. both before and after they learn who they are#i think a lot about how loop has several lines gently reassuring siffrin that bonnie never actually hated them. they've had time to reflect#and while theyve not healthily come to terms with much... they seem to actually have come to understand that one... and yet...#they aren't siffrin anymore now are they?#anyway im off on my travels for the next 2 weeks ! my wips shall stay that way for a while! yes this is a fucked one to leave u with!!!#byeeeee !!! ill be back !!!!#sorry to the claude wip for being stuck in purgatory for like over a month im usually not like this <3#abuse tw#as requested
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How… Do I recover from this…?
#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#bnha#mha#dabi#touya todoroki#bnha dabi#mha dabi#bnha season 7#mha season 7#i’m just… after the episode my mind went blank completely… and then i started sobbing… because what the fuck…#i feel even more heartbroken than i already did and literally can’t stop crying…#bruh i can’t… i’m completely shattered… i couldn’t take screenshots without stopping for few moments to cry over dabi…#he has suffered so much… endured so much… i feel sick to my stomach omfg…#and some of y’all want me to change my mind about endeavor??? HELL NAH I NOW HATE HIM EVEN MORE ACTUALLY#so congrats to all of you that wanted dabi fans to be more understanding toward the walking garbage: it didn’t work#and never will. he needs and deserves to rot in fucking hell
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Thinking about the fact that Mabel and Dipper didn't know they had two great uncles.
Yeah they are 12 and at 12 I had a shotty understanding of my family tree- But really? Nobody brought up their great uncle? Stanley? Especially since they'll be staying with his twin brother, Stanford?
Shermie never went to Stan's fake funeral, which to me means the twos relationship was strained on some level. If Shermie is older that means his view of Stan was poisoned in some way, that even as kids they weren't close. If the Shermie is younger then he never even got to meet Stan and all he knew about him was how he failed his family. Hell, people probably barely mentioned Stanley TO Shermie.
The fact that Stan had become a black stain upon the Pines family name makes me so vividly upset. Stanley faked his death and the family just- seemingly decided to strike him from the record. To pretend he didn't existed to spare themselves the sadness and shame.
Stanford and Shermie Pines. The only children worth mentioning of Filbrick and Caryn Pines.
It was never Stanford that was lost to the world. It was Stanley, ever since he had to leave New Jersy- it was always him that had to be struck from the record. Change his name, change his state, change his affiliations, destroy the remains of ghost that was Stanley Pines. Kill him so the family doesn't bring him up, doesn't ask questions, stops asking "Stanford" about his twin.
I just keep thinking about the fact that since the day he made one single mistake all the way up until Ford walks out of that machine- Stanley Pines was killed and did not exist. And Stan himself had no one to blame, he had to play the part in his own demise- He is the only one who ever knew Stanley was alive and has been for decades.
He lives in the multitudes of every personality he's ever taken, all in the hope that he himself can stop being Stanley Pines.
#gravity falls#grunkle stan#stanley pines#STANLEYYYYYY#STANLEY THEY COULD NEVER MAKE ME HATE YOU STANLEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#sharky rants#Just. Imagine the fucking shame you have to live with#the shame that you can never be yourself. That anything you were is unwanted and forgotten#The shame of just BEING- Of taking space of- of /breathing-/#Imagine the world; your friend; your family; your colleagues being so ashamed of having known you#that you feel more comfortable with a persona to present.#You feel more comfortable stealing the identity of someone you care for deeply if only to help#If only to feel capable for once. To feel like you belong- Like youre doing something good for once#Imagine the shame that brings you to be comfortable not being yourself for 40 years.#ALL CASE YOU BROKE ONE FUCKING PROJECT??????? COME ON#I mean- the deeprooted shame was started from earlier. He was 'the stupid twin“; 'the troublemaker”; “the cheat and thief”#This was a long time coming#But those werent MISTAKES- The one time he genuinely made a Mistake he lost everything#Like he really mattered so little to the people around him#and he cant really blame them.#My cousin is a genius. Hes smart and academically achieved since I was a baby.#The only thing I had that he didnt was my ability to draw. to be creative. The guy for the longest time had a better social life then me too#I used to get brought to tears seeing his accomplishments- seeing people praise him. The shame lived in me any time I had to see him#The shame that I was the black sheep of the family next to the golden standard for a son- for a student- for a friend.#when I was none of those things#And Im lucky he was my cousin- cause if he was my brother that would have haunted me EVERY DAY rather then once or twice a year#Im better with it now; Im more content with who I am- But trauma dump aside-#I very very very much understand Stans shame in being the stupid one. The unachieved one in a family full of achieved people#the shame thats angry at him for being better. at the family for treating him special. and most of all at yourself that you cant be better#its a visceral feeling that I sadly understand
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strange fellas
#my art#demon#illustration#oc#ethos#pathos#logos#lino printing fun as hell yippeeeeee#i don't have a scanner at home and i forgor to ask my mom to scan these for me like two days in a row so i just took photos#of the original scans and made do. too impatient. and the paper texture looks neat anyway#how the hell people make intricate line work with lino i do not understand. saw a mutual post a wolf's head lino print the other day#and it was so detailed with thin decorative lines. idk how they be doin it#if the answer is lots of patience and the knowledge you could fuck up at any moment then i guess i'll never hone the art
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