#they sit at the bar to keep Amanda company when it gets really quiet

[krillonthegrill]

i think i'll pass out if i don't see more Amanda Thomas fanart on my feed right now

i have so many ideas for art but i jut can't DRAW

[angrylizardjacket]

when i said it i thought it was true [3] {Ben Hardy}

A/N: 2973 words. Fake Dating AU.

[part 1] [part 2]

Roger Taylor has barely spoken two words to you since the start of filming, and it’s caused you so much anxiety. Were you disappointing? Did you not look or act accurate enough? Sometimes you catch him watching you when you’re with Ben, the two of you in costume, and he just looks... pensive. 

Brian’s nice enough, soft spoken and always kind when he speaks to you, actually mentions that seeing you and Ben together makes him a bit nostalgic, and you’re not quite sure what to make of it. 

The day you see the real Amanda, the woman you’re playing, you feel like you’re about to pass out. It’s as if you’ve got a direct look into your future, she could be your mother, though her hair’s just a little lighter than yours, hence the wigs they keep putting you in. She’s incredibly beautiful for her age, but that’s not the most striking thing about her. She cries the first time she sees Rami in costume, and she doesn’t speak to Roger. 

The moment she meets you, she has to take almost a full minute, hand covering her mouth as she looks you over. It’s like a test, and all you can do is stand there awkwardly in full costume, watching as she tears up a little.

“What do you think?” Brian asks with a proud smile, and she lets out an incredulous laugh. “It’s a little uncanny, isn’t it?” Nodding, she approaches you, smiling brightly and greeting you warmly. 

“Feels like I’ve gone back in time.” She’s surprisingly soft spoken, and she tugs at your collar, straightening it, before she rests her hands on your shoulders. “I’m flattered they’ve got you playing me, dear.” She tells you, and you think you might cry.

She only stays on set for about a week, the week you’re filming on the Garden Lodge set. The two of you are talking before filming starts for the day, you’re trying to glean any information you can that would help bring depth to your character, and Ben joins you. It’s the first time she’s seen him in full costume, and when he presses a kiss to your temple in greeting, her voice dies in her throat. Ben looks confused, concerned as she has to excuse herself.

It keeps happening, something about seeing the two of you in costume, together and sweet, it’s something she can’t stomach. She can talk to Ben normally, even when in costume, but the moment you arrive, and he smiles at you like he does, she feels her heart in her throat.

“I loved Roger, perhaps to my detriment.” She admits, taking a long sip of wine. She’d invited you out to dinner with her before she has to fly back to her family. “And I know what they’re saying in the movie, but he never really loved me.”

When you go to Ben with this information, he’s quiet, before he admits that Roger told him that when they were younger, their relationship was far from the sanitised version that was being presented in the film. 

They’d been together for years, and there was no doubt in anyone’s mind that she loved him, and he took her for granted, always assumed she’d be there when he got back from trips and tours, he’d even proposed to her, and yet he’d do any pretty young girl while he was away because he knew he could get away with it. He’d cheated on her, and lied to her, and strung her along because it was easier than letting go. 

Roger Taylor can’t bring himself to speak to you; you’re the spitting image of his biggest fault. Perhaps the way they’ve got it in the movie is his attempt at an apology, not that she’d accept. 

Something about your relationship with Ben changes after that. It doesn’t feel like a performance, the way it used to, it feels more grounded. Neither of you are sure how to deal with the new information, but when the cast go out for dinner together, he’s got a hand on your knee under the table, and when you’re hanging out in his trailer between scenes, you let yourself fall asleep against him where you’re watching Netflix. The two of you go out with some of the others for the night, and he kisses you as you’re leaving the club together, his hands holding your face so softly, the kiss so surprisingly tender that you don’t even hear the click of the paparazzi’s camera from where they’re hiding around the corner of the building, and when you see the kiss on instagram the next day, you don’t think you care.

“Have you seen my nice, black blouse?” You called, elbow deep in a pile of clean washing on a Saturday morning.

“Which one?” Ben calls back from the shower, and you frown at the clothes before you; you really had meant to fold them sooner.

“The nice nice one, the one I wear for callbacks, you know the one I’m talking about.” And you move to rifle through the closet again, glaring at each piece of clothing as you flip past it.

“You sure it’s here?” The shower shuts off while you’re eyeing off a perfectly fine cream shirt that could serve as a decent replacement if you came to it. “Are you sure it’s not at your place?” He asks, stepping out of his adjoining bathroom wearing only a towel.

“No, I’m pretty sure I came back here after my last callback.” You mused, and you could hear him getting changed behind you as you tried to recall the last time you’d found yourself in the shirt in question.

“This would be easier if you just lived here.” He muses, letting the statement hang in the air. After a beat, you turn to look at him, brow creased as you considered his words. “If you want to, you can.” He offered, standing there in just a pair of jeans, his hair still damp. It might be the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen.

“Are you serious?” Voice quietly hopeful, your expression brightens as he nods, grinning. Blouse forgotten, you cross the room in a few paces, throwing your arms around him. “Really really?”

“‘course I am.” He doesn’t tell you he loves you, but it’s there in the tone, in the way he kisses you, and it’s there when he spends the next twenty minutes helping you look for your shirt, though when you admit you don’t need it for a few days, he suggests breaking in the bed to fill the time.

“It’s the same bed.” You laugh as he flops back on it, coaxing you over.

“Yeah, but it’s ours.”

The wrap party for Bohemian Rhapsody is... a lot. It’s a bit overwhelming; you’re by Ben’s side and everyone wants to talk to him, congratulate him, and they want to talk to you, tell you how beautiful you look. Everyone is everywhere at all times, and the only constant is Ben. 

His arm is around your waist when the two of you are standing by the bar, he’s chatting to someone who’s name you’ve forgotten, though you’re pretty sure he’s the second assistant director or something, and you’re trying to communicate to the bartender what you want over the music, leaning over the bar. The moment the bartender finally nods in recognition and scurries off to get your drink, Ben turns, sees your eyes shining bright in the light of bar, and he forgets what he’s saying, just for a moment. The guy he’s talking to leaves, pulled away by someone in the crowd, and you turn, smiling brightly, confusion creasing your brow when you see Ben watching you.

“What?” The bar is in a terrible location, far too close to the band they’ve got set up, but Ben can read your lips well enough in the bar’s fluorescent lights. He shrugs, doesn’t even attempt to answer as the band, not ten feet away, blast their way through a guitar solo. They’re mostly playing classic rock, a few Queen songs here and there of course, and they’re not bad, they’re just loud. 

With your drink in one hand, you take his without thinking, weaving through the crowd, his fingers linked with yours. When you find the door to the courtyard, which is significantly quieter, you feel like you can breathe again. The air outside is cool, and you drop Ben’s hand now that you’re not likely to lose him in the crowd, and the two of you find seats to the side by a tall table. 

“You don’t have to stay with me all night.” You tell him, resting your head on your arms, watching as he lights up a cigarette. It was a filthy habit, but damn if it didn’t make him look a hot. Hotter. 

“I know that, dude,” he pauses, taking a draft and looking, watching all the people talking and laughing and bopping along to the music, “I like your company.” He says it easily but it still has you grinning, and when he catches sight, he grins in return.

He doesn’t leave your side. Not for the rest of the night. 

Photographs are being take all night, and when you look back on them, you see you and Ben sitting side by side, his arm around you as you lean into him, laughing, and he grins at something off camera. You see the cast together for a group shot, all smiling brightly, most a little tipsy, and you’re holding Ben’s hand, your linked fingers just visible in a gap between Allen and Lucy. You see the two of you in the background of a shot of Rami looking absolutely ecstatic; you’re fixing Ben’s hair, and he’s giving you such a soft, endeared look that you hadn’t noticed at the time. If you crop it enough to make it your phone background, you don’t feel the need to call attention to it; for reasons you can’t quite articulate, it makes your heart warm.

It’s strange, and the thing that terrifies you is that it doesn’t feel like acting. It’s that grey area you keep finding yourself in, where it feels so familiar, and it’s like swimming upstream to remember that it’s all fake. 

The two of you don’t even share a kiss, not even when you’re both tipsy, not even when you lean in to murmur something in his ear, and his answer brings his lips inches from yours. You want to kiss him, to forget that it’s all fake, but he sees you hesitate, and presses a gentle kiss to your cheek. Lips twisting in to a sad smile, you look out at the crowd of coworkers around you, dancing where the band had been replaced with a DJ, and you take another sip of your drink.

You’ve passed tipsy and dived straight into being drunk by the time you’re ready to head home, or well, back to your hotel room, but that required a taxi. Ben’s not much better off, and when you tug him into the back seat with you, he doesn’t argue. He’s the one who tells the driver the hotel they’ve got you all set up in, and you just lean against him, eyes fluttering closed, contentment filling you as he wraps his arm around you. 

“I don’t have any makeup wipes!” You gasp into the silence of the hotel elevator. It feels like the most natural thing in the world to head to his room, your arm tucked into his to keep you from swaying in place in the elevator. It might also be that Ben refused to let you be by yourself after you almost face planted getting out of the taxi.

“I’ve got some in case of emergencies.” He assured, fidgeting with his key card before the elevator comes to a stop.

“See, this is why I love you.” The words come so easily that neither of even catch at first as you make your way down the hall. Ben slows once your words have sunk in, and you both realise what you’d said. “I didn’t mean it like that, I’m sorry.” Voice quiet, there’s a sudden sinking sensation in your chest that dampens the whole night for you, but he doesn’t say anything, just opens the door and starts rummaging through his suitcase for the wipes once he’s inside. Once he tosses them to you, he follows it quickly with an oversized shirt to sleep in. 

There’s a solid five minute argument about who would sleep on the sofa, both of you trying to give the other one the bed. It takes you yanking a pillow from the bed, laying on the sofa and refusing to move for Ben to concede defeat. The sofa, however, is the single most uncomfortable piece of furniture you’ve ever had the misfortune of trying to sleep on. Sucking up your pride, you clutch the pillow to your chest as you make your way to the edge of the bed. He’s turned away from you, engrossed in his phone.

“Ben?” You ask, and he looks over his shoulder at you, eyebrows raised in question. “The sofa is really uncomfy.” You pouted. With a grin, he shifted, making room for you.

“Holy shit.” Ben looks like he’s just seen a ghost. The two of you are in a nice restaurant in the city, it’s not five stars or anything like that, actually it happened to be your favourite little hole-in-the-wall restaurant with surprisingly good food and excellent service, and you were treating yourselves to a night out before Ben had to step outside to take a call. You didn’t begrudge him, that’s just how life was for the two of you. “Holy shit.” He repeated, and you looked up from your meal with raised eyebrows. 

“What’s up?” You ask, and to see the smile spreading slowly over his face has your heart warming. When he meets your eyes, he’s beaming.

“I think I’m going to be in X-Men.” He said quietly, and your fork fell from your hand, clattering against your plate.

“Holy shit.” You echoed, and he laughed a little, taking your hand when you offered it to him, squeezing gently. 

The stars seem to shine a little brighter as Ben beams up at them, your hand in his as the two of you walk home. Sure, there’s paperwork, nondisclosure agreements, rehearsals, and a few months until filming actually begins, but Ben’s landed a role in a high-budget action movie, and you’ve never been prouder. 

He spends the next few weeks in countless meetings, almost constantly in and out of phone calls with his manager and various producers, and when he’s not filming with Eastenders, he was usually training. He’s barely home, though neither of you are home a lot, you’re busy with your own projects, but when you see each other, he’s elated. You haven’t seen him this excited or motivated about a project before. 

Sometimes you miss him. Of course you miss him, you love him after all, he’s your boyfriend and your housemate, and you tell him all of this over dinner and he looks like he wants to say something, like he wants to freeze this moment in time forever, to bottle it up if he could.  You’re so proud, and you love him so much, and it’s the most beautiful thing in the world to watch those two parts of you coming together over a microwave dinner.

In the weeks leading up to filming, things change, and you feel like you never see him anymore. It’s not like before, then you were just busy, now he’s all over the country, in meetings and fittings and workshops. He calls, but your bed is so empty and sometimes you just want to come home to him and he’s not there, and he won’t be home until the end of the week. Things are still good and bright when you see each other - he’s always eager to make up for lost time - and you never once doubt how much he cares about you, but you feel... out of sync. 

The two of you had fallen asleep not facing each other, but you wake with his arm draped across you, and it feels so familiar, so right, that it stings when you actually come to and realise where you are. 

It’s been years since you’d woken up next to him, and you’d forgotten how pretty he is in his sleep. Part of you thinks that’s a good thing, that if you start to remember now you might keep dwelling. Another part of you urges you to go back to sleep; pretend or not, you should savour this moment you’ve missed so dearly. That’s the part that wins.

You expect when you wake again, for him to already be up and moving, as far away from you as possible, but instead you hear a sleep-rough greeting in your ear, and feel his chest firm against your back, his arm still around you where you’ve tucked yourself against him.

It’s not pretend, it feels like history repeating itself, and so you let yourself forget it’s fake for the moment, lean into him just a little and give a sleepy greeting back. Your heart already aches knowing how lonely you’ll feel once either of you move.

“I forgot how nice you smell.” He murmured, and that’s when you feel your heart already beginning to break. Instead of letting yourself crumble, your link your fingers with his hand where it’s slung over your waist.

“I forgot how warm you are; you’re like a furnace.” And you hear him laugh at that as he leans into you too, and let yourself bask in the moment.

the rat pack: @hotspacedeacon @strangeandwonderfulconcepts @itssaje @d-r-e-a-m-catchme ​ @callumidiot @rockandrollandshit @bohorap @pietrorunsforme @sweetfierceimagines @itsjackothy @mhftrs @sherlockiantheatrenerd @softbenhardy @multifandomgirlrandomstuff @virtualsheepeat @smile-nine @i-padfootblack-things @deaconsroger @spookyfrances @holyurlbatman @your-idiotic-excellency

(crossed out means it wouldn’t tag; i’ll try again for the next part, lemme know if you wanna be tagged xx)

[imnotdoneyet-forreal]

Deals with the Devil- 1

Author: Amanda Preston

Summary: A need to fill a void and an encounter to start something new, Elijah and Katya never knew that a simple one night stand would wind up into a love affair filled with family drama and side deals gone wrong. 

Deals with the Devil Masterlist

        Katya sunk into the bar stool nursing her second drink since she got to the bar. She continued to swirl the ice with her straw as she tried to pinpoint the exact moment in her life where things started to go wrong. The thing was that Katya couldn’t find it. She had fought tooth and nail to keep her small publishing house afloat and none of her efforts worked.

        With a sigh, Katya resigned herself to the fact that nothing was going to stop the inevitable of tomorrow. She had lost and it was time for her to swallow that bitter pill and move on.

        She finished her second drink and the bartender, who Katya considered her best friend at the moment, quickly slid her a refill.

        “Thank you…” Katya states as her eyes narrowed at the nametag on the bartender’s shirt. “...Camille.”

        “Call me Cami,” she responds with a gentle smile.

        “Ok Cami,” Katya replies with a nod as she looked down at her drink once more. “Thanks again.”

        Cami hesitates in moving on from her current patron. She had been written off twice for talking to her customers for too long but this one seemed worth getting written off a third time.

        “So what can I call you?”

        Katya looks up at Cami the bartender in surprise. She stops playing with her drink and sits up a bit straighter in her chair.

        “Katya,” she answers. “Katya Fontaine.”

        “Fontaine,” Cami repeats with interest. “French right?”

        “Yes,” Katya nods. “And before you ask, yes I’m a New Orleans native.”

        Cami chuckles at this and nods.

        “Same here,” Cami answers. “So what brings you here in a quiet afternoon?”

        “I’m trying to drink my sorrows away,” Katya responds as she took a sip from her glass. “I’m sure you get a lot of those coming around here.”

        “We sure do,” Cami tells her. “But most of them don’t have a good reason. I have a feeling that you do.”

        Katya nods at this and shrugs.

        “Losing my job tomorrow,” Katya explains. “And I’m probably going to cause a lot of people to lose their jobs too.”

        “How so?”

        “Because selling out to the big man doesn’t come without any consequences,” Katya explains to her. “But c’est la vie. It’s a dog eat dog world.”

        “It sure is…” Cami sighs out before taking notice of the new patron that walked into the bar.

        Katya turns and finds a well-dressed man making his way towards them. He tugged at his tie to loosen it and slumped into a chair a few seats away from Katya. Cami gives her a sympathetic look before heading towards him.

        “What can I get you?” Cami asks him.

        “Whiskey neat,” he answers.

        Cami nods at this and moves to the other end of the bar to grab the bottle. Katya knew she should look away from the man but found herself unable to. It was like when she drove past a car accident. She wanted to look away and continue driving, ignore the devastating scene, but was too curious to know more.

        “Put his drink on my tab,” Katya finds herself saying as Cami came back with his glass. Cami and the stranger were caught by surprise by this and Katya had to admit that she surprised herself as well. She clears her throat and offers both of them a small smile. “Misery seems to like company so why not enjoy a drink or two while we’re at it.”

        Katya raises her glass of cranberry vodka in cheers before drinking down the rest of it. She let out a sigh as she set her glass back down.

        “What do you have to be upset about?” the man asks.

        Katya was surprised to find him a seat closer to her and took her time to look at him. His chestnut hair was combed back, his suit was fitted but disheveled and Katya chalked that off to his current emotional state as he wore a tired smile on his lips. He was trying to remain polite and cordial even though something had obviously happened to him.

        “I’m a sell out,” Katya answers. “I’m making a deal with the devil tomorrow and I can’t do anything about it.”

        “What kind of deal?” Elijah asks.

        “I uh…” Katya hesitates to answer.

        She didn’t want to dive into the logistics that had been spinning around her head ever since she met with her lawyer that afternoon. She also doubted that the man wanted to listen through the inner workings of her business.

        “I’m selling my small publishing house to a big corporation tomorrow. And knowing how these things go I’m sure I’m going to get laid off alongside half of my staff so… yeah.”

        “I’m sure you wouldn’t be selling if you had no other choice,” he offers to her.

        “I really wouldn’t,” Katya sighs out. “But maybe if I had realized sooner that this would be the inevitable choice I could have found someone better to sell to. Maybe I could have found some kind of leverage and be able to haggle some kind of deal for my employees.”

        “It’s never too late to set your terms,” he tells her. “Until you sign the paperwork you have time to make your own deal.”

        “That’s too much of a risk,” Katya responds. “What if they don’t want to buy if I start setting up these demands?”

        “Then tell them you have someone else interested,” he answers. “That’ll make them more pliable to follow your terms.”

        Katya thinks this through and decided she would speak to her lawyer before heeding the advice of a stranger.

        “I’ll think about it,” Katya states with a nod. “Thank you.”

        “It’s the least I could do for the lady who paid for my drink.”

        Katya chuckles at this and motions to Cami for a refill on her drink.

        “So,” she states as she turned to the stranger. “You heard my problems, now let’s hear about yours.”

        “I’m sure you don’t…”

        “I do,” Katya interrupts him. “Maybe I can help.”

        The man tugs at his tie once more as he stared at the bar counter.

        “My fiancee of seven years was sleeping with one of my former employees,” he states. “I found out about it today.”

        “Oh I…”

        “Take a few seconds,” he offers to her with a small smile. “It took me awhile for my head to wrap around it as well.”

        “I’m sorry,” Katya says.

        “Nothing to be sorry about,” he sighs out. “A part of me always knew that this was happening. I just didn’t want to admit it.”

        Katya moves a seat closer to him and wonders if she should voice the thought that was going through her head. Any other day, Katya would have let the thought go but not today. Not when she was just starting to feel the effect of the vodka and Cami had just handed her a fourth shot.

        “I don’t want to be rude or anything,” she starts off. “But you don’t look that heartbroken for someone who found out that their fiancee was cheating on them.”

        “Perhaps I’m not,” he answers. “I loved her once but somewhere along the way I lost that and I can admit that now.”

        “Maybe it’s best that this happened now,” Katya states. “Sets you both free.” .

        “Yes,” he answers as he raised his glass up. “I’m free to do as I please.”

        “And soon,” Katya answers. “So will I.”

        She raises her glass towards him and he clinks it lightly. They both take their time to drink the rest of their drinks and quickly order another round.

*

        Their drunken breaths are mixed together as Katya is pressed against the door they had just come through. She watches as he tugs at the tie around his neck and pulls it over his head and throws it aside. He looks at her and she can tell that he was thinking the same thing she was.

        How did they get to this point? Who was this stranger in front of them? Should they really go through with this?

        Katya can’t remember how they got to his apartment. One second they were talking at the bar slowly getting themselves drunk and the next they were kissing and stumbling into the Uber he had called for.  

        “I uh…” he whispers unsurely. “Do you want a drink or something?”

        Katya can’t help but chuckle, “I think we drank enough. Maybe some water would do us some good.”

        “Yes,” he answers. “Yes, you’re right. I’ll be back soon.”

        He walks off into the hallway and Katya slowly after him. She can’t help but take in the apartment and noticed how modern and cold it looked. They were no pictures in frames or unnecessary clutter that mounted on the coffee table. No, there were abstract paintings hung on walls and books lined on bookshelves that were too new to have ever been read.

        Katya couldn’t help but stop in front of the large windows that displayed New Orleans’ skyline. It left her in awe watching the night town come to life.

        “There you are.”

        Katya looks back to find him walking into the living room with two glasses of water. She offers him a shy smile as she takes one from him.

        “Sorry, I just… you have the most amazing view,” Katya tells him. “And also the nicest apartment I’ve ever seen.”

        Katya felt the need to sober herself up further and so she drinks the glass of water as she watched the lights twinkle.

        “You are more than welcome to stay the night,” he offered. “We don’t have to do anything.”

        Katya glances at him and noticed how his focus remained on the skyline. He looked tired again and she sensed that his offer was in fact genuine. She knew that she should have just thanked him and left but something about his expression kept her in place.

        This one was different from what she had first seen at the bar. He looked defeated and Katya wondered if he thought that she had rejected him when she asked him for water. It was obvious that neither of them were used to drunken one night stands. For Christ’s sake, this man had been engaged earlier that day and yet he admitted to not being heartbroken.

        In fact, Katya wondered if he was just disappointed. With who? She doesn’t know. Maybe he blamed his ex for not communicating with him but Katya was leaning more towards him blaming himself.

        She wondered if his job consumed his life and led for his ex to find attention elsewhere. She wondered if he always felt alone in the relationship and if he felt lonely living in an apartment that held no aspect of warmth. She wondered if he felt this every day when he returned from a long day of work and if he ignored the gnawing emotion by working more.

        He finally turns to look at her and Katya realizes that she had been staring at him for too long. His question was asked again through his gaze on her and Katya found herself answering him with a soft kiss on his lips. She pulls away and lets out a sigh.

        “I’m not used to doing things like this, one night stands,” Katya whispers as she undid the first few buttons on his shirt. “And it seems that neither are you.”  

        “I consider myself a gentleman,” he answers quietly.

        “Well you don’t have to be a gentleman tonight,” Katya tells him as she set her glass aside.

        “Oh?”

        Katya kisses him again and presses herself against his body. Her hands were traveling down his body and she noticed the hard planes in his chest and abdomen. She let out a sigh when she felt him touch her in return. Feeling the ways his hands outlined the curves of her body before resting on the zipper of her dress.

        He pulls away and rests his forehead against her own. He gazes down at her once more and somehow still in control he offers her an out.

        “Are you sure about this?”

        Katya nods and presses a soft kiss on his lips. Her nose graced against his as she peered up at him.

        “Are you?”

        He eagerly nods and immediately consumes her into a passionate kiss that left her head swirling. His hands quickly tugged down at the zipper of her dress and she matches his eagerness by pulling at his suit jacket and unbuttoning the rest of his shirt.

        In different aspects of undress, he pulls at her waist and Katya takes the hint and lets him carry her towards the bedroom down the hall. He kicks the door closed behind him sealing themselves off for the night.

[shipperfeelings]

You make my soul dance

Usually I'm a quiet person, someone who always has her nose stuck in a book. Most of the time I'm by myself, but I do enjoy the company of my friends.

Now someone who knows me would wonder, why I'm currently sitting in a bar. All by myself. Easy! My boyfriend cheated on me and I kicked him out. Usually I wouldn't get in the near of a bar, but I was heartbroken and needed a distraction. Sipping on my tequila, I got lost in my thoughts. I texted my best friend earlier what had happened. Of course she asked if I need her, but stupid me refused her company. Now here I was, sitting in a bar, alone, sipping an alcoholic drink and trying to put myself together. I don't need some stranger to see me crying. Scrolling through my phone, I deleted all pictures of my ex and me. That Bastard, I thought. Someone sat next to me. “A penny for your thoughts?” I looked up and next to me sat Sarah Paulson. She was my celebrity crush and if I weren't that heartbroken, I would have fainted. I always dreamt about meeting her and now here she was. Sadly I couldn't enjoy it. “Hello” I smiled at her, but continued to delete the pictures. “Is everything okay?” She asked worried. All pictures were gone now and I put my phone on the bar counter. Looking at her, I studied her face. She looked clearly worried and I sighed. “My boyfriend cheated on me.” Sarah laid her hand on mine. “I'm so sorry. Why would someone cheat on you? You are beautiful.” “It seems I was too boring for him. He said I'm always reading books or drawing pictures, but have no time for him. That's not true, I always asked him if we could go anywhere, but he always refused and said he's too tired. But of course I'm the one who's fault it is.” Amazing, now I was crying. I stood and apologized. “I'm sorry Ms. Paulson, I just need a moment.” I wiped my tears away and walked to the toilets. I got into one of the cabinets and locked the door. Sitting on the toilet, I pulled my knees up to my chest and buried my head in them. I cried silently and some time later, someone knocked on my door. “Go away” I shouted. “Open the door, please.” It was Sarah. I stood up and unlocked the door. I opened it and looked at her. My mascara was probably smudged now and my eyes puffy from the crying. Sarah pulled me out of the cabinet and hugged me. “Why do you care? You should be with your friends and not with some strange girl, who's crying in a bar.” She stroked my back and said “I was with my friends, but after I saw you and saw how sad you looked, I needed to make sure that everything was okay.” “But why? I'm not the only one in here who had a shit day.” “I don't know, I just noticed you immediately” Sarah whispered. The door opened and some woman came in. “Hey Sarah, are you here?” I drew back from her embrace. “Yes I'm here” Sarah answered and looked down to me. I was shorter than her. The woman who came in, was Amanda. Sarah's best friend. She looked between her and me and I mumbled “I should go.” Sarah wanted to say something to me, but I was already gone. I walked all the way to my apartment, because I needed the cool air to clear my mind. It was all confusing and frustrating. First that with my boyfriend, than out of nowhere came Sarah Paulson and tried to cheer me up. As I reached my apartment and opened the door, I immediately started to threw all the stuff out what belongs to my ex.

The next day I laid mostly in bed and moped. My phone buzzed, but my first instinct was to not look. After all it could be my ex. But some time later, I looked at it. Sarah Paulson tweeted something.

“Yesterday I met a girl in a bar. Sadly she was gone before I could ask for her number. If you read this, please write me directly here on Twitter.”

Normally I would have immediately wrote her, but I was embarrassed that she saw me in that miserable state last night. I decided to not write her and put my phone under my pillow.

Two days later, I was feeling a little bit better and even got out of my apartment. I decided that I needed a fresh start. A haircut was all I needed. Going to my hair stylist, I told her everything. She cut my hair on shoulder length and dyed the most of my hair blonde. My hair stylist told me that now my brown eyes were even more effective now.

After that I decided to also buy new clothes. Some time later I walked out of a shop, with bags in my hands, I bumped into someone. “I'm so sorry.” I apologized and crouched down to pick up my bags. “It was my fault, I should apologize.” My body tensed. That voice! I knew that voice! I hope it wasn't her.

I looked up slowly. Yeah it was her. Sarah Paulson. Her eyes widened a little bit. “So we'll meet again.” She held her hand towards me and I took it. Sarah pulled me up and I sighed. “It seems like that” I whispered. She looked amazing. She had a floral dress on with a cardigan.

She linked our arms and asked “Do you mind?” I shook my head and bit my lip. “Cat got your tongue?” “No, I just didn't expected to meet you again.” She guided me to a little Café and sat down. “I never got your name” Sarah said to me. “Oh I'm (Y/N)” I blushed. I looked around us and Sarah padded the chair next to her. I sat down. “Did you saw my tweet?” Oops, there it is. “Yes” I told her quietly. “Why didn't you wrote me then?” She crossed her arms in front of her chest and I blushed. “I was embarrassed.” “What? Why?” “Because you saw me in a miserable situation?” “Oh sweetie, you don't need to be embarrassed about it. It's okay, really. Are you feeling better now? I noticed that you have a new haircut.” My hand reached for my hair and I smiled lightly. “Yes, I'm feeling a little bit better. I needed a fresh start and the haircut was the solution.” “It looks really good. Your eyes look even darker now.” I smiled and Sarah whispered to herself “Beautiful.” We ordered us something to drink and she asked me, if she can have my phone number now. As I typed my number in her phone, I asked “Why do you want my phone number anyway?” “Why not? I like you and I'd like to stay in touch with you.” “Are you really Sarah Paulson?” I laughed, because it's just surreal. “Yes of course, do I need to prove it?” “Maybe” I smirked and sipped my drink. I ordered a hot chocolate and Sarah a coffee. “I could show you my tattoo, what no one has clearly seen before.” Sarah thought loud. “Oh yeah? Which one?” “Come with me” she smirked and took my hand. She guided me to the restroom and on the way she paid for our drinks. I noticed it too late, otherwise I had protested. She pulled me in one of the cabinets. “Lock the door.” Locking the door, I turned around to her. “Are you sure, that you need a prove?” Sarah as whispering in my ear and I got goosebumps. “I'm not that sure anymore.” “Too late” Sarah whispered. She turned her back to me and slighted pulled one side of her dress up. I gasped and closed my eyes. “If you want to see the tattoo, you have to open your eyes.” I could hear her chuckle and opened one eye. Sarah had pulled one side of her dress up and she held it above her hip. There was the bumper, I already read about. On an impulse my fingers ghosted above it. Sarah got goosebumps and I drew my hand back. She let her dress fall down again and turned to me. “Proof enough?” Sarah whispered smiling. Her face was just centimeters from my own. “Yes.” My whole body tickled as Sarah leaned down to me. I panicked and unlocked the door. Slipping out, I put some distance between her and myself. “I need to go Sarah, but it was really nice to see you again.” And with that I was gone.

Unknown Number: “Why are you always running away from me? I really like to get to know you, but you always run away. It's Sarah btw 💃”

I was walking home and heard music, when my phone vibrated. It was in my jacket pocket and I took it out.

I saved her number and replied.

Me: “I'm so sorry Sarah. I don't know why I keep going with this. I'm nervous around you 🙊”

Me: "Said the celebrity 😳"

Sarah Paulson: “You don't need to be nervous. I'm just as normal as you.”

Sarah Paulson: “Okay yeah, I'm a celebrity, but I'm just like you. Come on give me a chance. I never had to try this hard for someone to like me.”

Me: “Oh I like you, I really do.”

Sarah Paulson: “Then let me take you out. Tomorrow. 8pm. I will pick you up, just give me your address 😏”

I sighed and thought about my possibilities.

Me: “Okay. Here's my address.” I sent it to her and called my best friend. After I told her everything, I asked her if it was a good idea to meet with Sarah. She screamed at me through the phone. “You always dreamt about meeting her and now you're scared? Come on (Y/N), are you kidding me? What's the problem?” “I don't know. It's just that she's always so close to me and brushes my skin. My body's reactions are confusing me” I told her as I walked through my door. “What reactions?” “I'm always blushing and have sweaty hands. And today Sarah pulled me into a toilet cabinet showed me that bumper tattoo on her hip.” Just talking about it made me blush. “She did what?” (Y/BF/N) screamed. “She showed you her ass?” “What? No! Not exactly. I mean she had a dress on after all.” “So you had a look at her ass.” “I'm hanging up now asshole.” Ending the call, I threw my phone on the couch. I walked into my bedroom and opened my closet. I picked my outfit for tomorrow, because I had no time for it tomorrow. I had to go to work after all. After an hour I decided on a outfit I always felt confident in it.

The next day after work I took a shower and  changed into my outfit. I was styling my hair when the doorbell rang. Opening the door, my eyes widened and I gasped. It was Sarah. She looked breathtaking, but she gasped too. I couldn't say a word, just look at her.

“You look fantastic, no gorgeous. I don't have words for you” I stumbled upon my own words. Sarah took my hand and spun me around. “You're the one who's breathtaking.” She pulled me against her body and hugged me. “Come on, let me take you out.” Sarah drove with me to a quiet little restaurant and we sat down in a dark corner. On our table stood a candle and the atmosphere was very romantic. It made me a little bit nervous, if I'm honest. We ordered drinks and Sarah started to ask me questions. She wanted to know everything what I'm working, how old I am, what my favorite food is and more. During the dinner, I couldn't hold my question to myself anymore. “Aren't you with Holland Taylor? Why did you take me out? What is going on here?” Sarah put her cutlery down and looked up. Her eyes were wide and I couldn't tell what her expression meant. I swallowed and waited. “No, I'm not with Holland anymore. It's not official yet, but it will be very soon” she said calm. She didn't answered my other questions and I narrowed my eyes. She changed the topic and I let it slip. For now!

After the dinner, Sarah asked me if I would like to go to the park with her. “Of course. It's a lovely night.” We walked side by side and at some point she laced her hand with mine. We stopped at a little lake and Sarah turned to me. “It was a beautiful evening (Y/N). I know I haven't answered your questions, but I don't know if you're ready for it.” “Just tell me” I looked up at her. Her eyes searched mine and she stroked my cheek. Sarah leaned down and kissed me. Through my whole body shot electricity and I gasped into the kiss. Sarah deepened it and tangled her hand in my hair. “I'm falling in love with you” she whispered against my lips, when we drew back to take a breath. “I was never with a woman before” I whispered back, my hand on her waist. “Then let me be your first woman, please.” As an answer, I kissed her again and she deepened it. I always dreamed about that, I thought.

[hysterialevi]

Legend pt. 1

Author’s note: WELL, it’s been quite some time since I last wrote about Cobblebats (or a sane Bruce), but we’re finally back and I’m super excited to get started. Thank you so much for the support you gave me during Lotus; I really appreciate you guys staying around for all these stories, and I hope you’ll enjoy this one as much. Stay awesome.

From Oswald’s POV

21 YEARS AGO

COBBLEPOT PARK

The tall boy threw his fist across my face, landing a heavy blow on the bone as pain throbbed throughout my entire cheek. Regardless of how hard I tried to defend myself, or how hard I fought back, my opponent always seemed to be two steps ahead of me...and it was humiliating.

I instantly tumbled to the soaked ground due to the impact, causing the other kids around us to laugh as he taunted me with a sneer.

“What’s the matter, Cobblepot?” Joseph asked. “Can’t go crying to your mom now that she’s in Arkham? I’m not surprised, to be honest. Everyone knows your family’s full of fuckin’ lunatics,” he threw another punch at me, grinning deviously. “Looks like the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.”

I would’ve been lying if I said Joseph didn’t just strike a nerve, but I knew that was his intention. I knew that was what he wanted.

Joseph was always targeting me -- whether it was at school, at the park, or even on my own goddamned doorstep -- and he used me as a way to make himself feel better. It was straight up torture to put up with him.

But no matter what, I had to remember what Bruce told me. I couldn’t let it get to me. I couldn’t allow him to keep hurting me. I had to stand up to him.

Spitting blood onto the mud below, I slowly pushed myself up, my limbs quivering with strain as I tried to rise to my feet.

“Oh no, no...” Joseph said in a condescending manner. “I don’t think so.”

With a simple, strong kick, he aggressively jabbed the tip of his shoe into my stomach and sent me staggering into the dirt once again as I coughed heavily, struggling to catch my breath.

“Well, go on, then,” he teased as he watched me roll around. “Get up, Oz. If you’re so damn tough.”

Another kick. To ensure I’d stay down. I felt like I was going to be sick now. 

“Look at you!” The bully jeered obnoxiously. “You’re so weak it’s embarrassing. Nothing but a little bitch with a boozed-up dad. Isn’t that right, Oz?” 

He crouched down to my level and leaned in, smirking arrogantly as he gripped the back of my collar.

“You’re a bitch,” he growled. “You hear that? My bitch. And if you ever try to forget it, I’ll come back and remind you. Maybe I’ll bring some friends along, too. Depends on how you behave. So stay in your place, and be a good boy. All right?”

I glared at the bully, staring him straight in the eye with a glower as I wiped the blood from my mouth.

“...Fuck you, Joseph.”

He chuckled, clearly annoyed by my response. “Oh, yeah?”

Joseph flipped me over and took a handful of my shirt, pinning me down as he slammed his fist directly into my nose with a sickening crack.

I let out an agonized shout and fell limp on the ground, completely drained of all energy as hot blood streamed down my face.

“How’s that?” He goaded. “Teach you to be a smartass.”

Turning to his friends, Joseph gestured them to leave and began to saunter away from the scene, glancing back at me with a snicker.

“C’mon,” he beckoned. “Let’s get outta here. I think this shithead’s learned his lesson for now. But we’ll be back.”

Leaving me alone in the ruffled, flattened grass, Joseph casually strolled off as if nothing happened while I clutched my wounded nose, writhing in the mud out of discomfort.

Why was it always me? I thought to myself. Why couldn’t I just be left alone?

My entire family was falling apart as if we had suddenly been forgotten, and these days, the name “Cobblepot” was nothing but a joke in Gotham. No one took our family as seriously as they used to, and even less wanted to be associated with us. Instead, everyone in my school just acted like my we didn’t even exist anymore. 

Everyone...except for Bruce. He was the only one I could count on.

Bruce would protect me from Joseph and any other bullies, keep me company when my parents were absent, and stay in touch even though the rest of the school ridiculed me. He didn’t care what other people thought about our friendship, or about the rumors circling around. 

We had a close bond between us, and that was all that mattered to him. Bruce refused to let my dad’s reputation alone destroy everything we had.

...And that was why I loved him.

Maybe not in the same way most people used that word, but there was definitely a deeper connection holding us together than just a mere “friendship.”

We were family. And I hoped we would stay that way forever.

Interrupting my thoughts, a boy suddenly called out to me from a distance -- as if on queue -- and made me forget all my troubles for a moment as I turned to see who it was.

“...Oz?” He asked. “Is that you?”

Not too far away from my location, I saw none other than Bruce himself entering the park as he greeted me from the other side of the gate, softly tapping his umbrella on the metal to get my attention.

“Bruce!” I exclaimed out of relief, my voice slightly trembling. “There you are. I...I’m glad you’re here.”

My friend took a closer look at me, clearly shocked by the fresh wounds on my face.

“Jesus -- what on Earth happened to you, Oz?” He leaned in, taking on a more serious tone. “...Did Joseph come after you again?”

I nodded silently, trying to pretend as if it didn’t bother me that much.

Bruce let out a sympathetic sigh, lightly gripping onto one of the gate’s bars.

“I’m sorry, Oz. I wish I could’ve gotten here sooner. You don’t deserve to be treated this way, and I don’t know what else I can do to help. There’s only so much that’ll keep Joseph away.”

“It’s all right...” I reassured quietly, “the fact that you’re here is enough. And besides, this is my fight to finish. Not yours. I swear, Bruce, I’m gonna smash Joseph’s damn face in someday. And then he’ll regret everything he’s done to me.”

Bruce seemed slightly alarmed by that. 

“The worst thing you can do is become him, Oz,” he reminded. “Joseph goes around and preys on anyone who’s smaller than him. He drags them down to his level. You’re better than that. Never forget it...okay?” 

“...Okay, okay.” I reluctantly agreed, waving a dismissive hand. “You’re right.”

“’Course I am,” Bruce joked, changing the subject. “Anyway, you need to get up now.”

I quirked a brow. “What d’you mean?”

He tapped his umbrella on the gate again.

“You need to get up.” He said a second time, without explanation.

BLACKGATE PRISON

MODERN DAY, NIGHTTIME

“...Get up, Cobblepot!”

A loud, metallic cling echoed throughout the cell, causing me to jolt awake. I lay still for a moment, confused at what was going on.

“C’mon, prisoner!” The guard repeated, his voice growing increasingly agitated as he banged his baton against the bars. “I won’t say it again.”

I sluggishly rose from the bed and stretched my arms, rubbing my eyes as a fatigued yawn escaped me. 

I glared at the guard with a squinted gaze, blinded by their flashlight. 

“Fuck’s sake...” I mumbled out, “...what is it? The sun ain’t even up yet. ...Or were you just gettin’ lonely?”

The guard scoffed at that and roughly slid the door open, beckoning me. 

“And the other guards said you were charming.”

Tearing myself away from the comfort of the bed, I sauntered over to him with a loose posture as I gave him a lazy frown.

“I’m much more of a gentleman when it’s not four in the morning. What's goin’ on?”

Shoving me forward, the guard began to explain things along the way as other prisoners eyeballed us from their own cells, curious about what we were doing. Despite it being the middle of the night, not many of the inmates actually appeared to be asleep.

“You’ve got a visitor.” He said plainly.

“A visitor?” I questioned, surprised by the answer. “At this time? What do they want?”

The guard pushed me around a corner.

“You can ask them yourself when we get there. Now be quiet.”

“All right, all right...” I chuckled. “I’m just curious, is all. Not really many folks in Gotham who’d like to pay me a visit.”

The guard’s brow furrowed. “I’m starting to see why.”

“Cranky, aren’t we?” I remarked. “You sure another guard didn’t lose their baton up your arse?”

“I mean it, prisoner,” he warned. “Be quiet.”

I sighed out of annoyance. “Fine...have it your way. Just tryin’ to make conversation.”

The guard led me down a spiral staircase, taking me to the first floor as we headed for the visiting room.

“Oh, trust me,” he replied, “there’ll be plenty of time for that later.”

VISITING ROOM

Wandering into the empty space, the guard stayed behind as I approached my guest who was sitting alone at one of the tables with nothing but a pair of files in front of them. They looked like a relatively young man -- probably around the same age as me -- and wore a neat suit along with a device in their ear. 

I didn’t recognize his face, and I certainly hadn’t been expecting anyone, but clearly, this man wasn’t just some random nobody. The prison guards would’ve never let him in during this hour, otherwise. So who was he?

As curious as I was to see what this stranger wanted however, the secrecy of this arrangement also had me on high-alert. I had to be careful.

“Erm...” I cleared my throat, “...hello?”

The man turned to look at me. “Ah, there you are,” he casually gestured at the chair across from him. “Please, have a seat. There’s much we need to discuss.”

Despite my hesitance, I complied nonetheless and decided to play along with the man for now, admittedly hooked with interest.

“Mind tellin’ me your name, first?” I asked. 

The man refused. 

“Who I am is of no importance. All you need to know...is who I represent.”

“And that would be...?”

He rested his elbows on the table, looking me straight in the eye. “The Agency. Or, more specifically, the director of the Agency. Amanda Waller.”

I furrowed my brows. “The Agency? What do they want with me?”

The man slid one of the files in my direction, urging me to open it.

“A profile of Bruce Wayne,” he explained as I flipped through it. “I understand you know him well.”

“...Yeah,” I confirmed in a somewhat regretful tone. “We was close as kids. Inseparable. Thought we’d stay that way, too.”

“And now?”

I shut the file closed, not wanting to look at Bruce anymore. He and I already had enough bad memories together. I didn’t need to think about them any further.

“Now...” I continued, “we’re like strangers. Everything I thought I knew about Wayne turned out to be a lie. In the end, he was just as bad as his father.”

The man seemed unconvinced. “Oh, I’m sure you know him better than you think.”

Switching out the files, he gestured for me to read through the second one as  he observed my every move, obviously scheming something that he had yet to expose.

“It’s Batman.” I said, scanning over the first page.

“You’re familiar with him, too, aren’t you?”

I laughed at the understatement. “Familiar? I almost killed the bastard. Almost. Other than that, there ain’t much to say about the vigilante. He’s not exactly an open book. ...Why? What does Waller want with these people?”

Retrieving the file, the agent stacked them together in a neat pile and put them aside for the moment, getting right to the point. There was a certain look in his eyes that unsettled me. A look that said he knew something I didn’t. Half of me wanted to hear what it was, but the other half dreaded the forbidden information. After all, there was a reason people had secrets.

“Tonight,” he began, “I’ve presented you with the profiles of two very prominent citizens in Gotham. However...we have only discussed one person.”

I sat there in silence, trying to process what the agent just told me. 

“...Wait, what are you...” 

He appeared amused by my shock. 

“I understand it’s hard to comprehend. It wasn’t too long ago that I was in the same position as you.”

I combed a hand through my hair and shook my head, still in disbelief.

“No, no, no. That can’t be right. They’re nothing alike! Bruce Wayne is just some playboy billionaire who got rich off his father’s crimes, and Batman is...well, Batman. He fights criminals, fights for ‘justice.’ Something Wayne knows nothing about. And you’re tellin’ me...they’re the same person?”

He nodded firmly. “That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

I let out an overwhelmed sigh, suddenly feeling the need to go back to sleep.

“...And why tell me all this? Why give me this kind of info? This isn’t something you’d just reveal to anyone -- if what you’re sayin’ is true.”

The agent pushed the files towards me. “Because Director Waller has a job for you. See, the Agency has been watching your moves for quite some time now, Oswald. We know about everything you’ve done -- from your blackmailing Hamilton Hill...to the disfiguring of Harvey Dent. There’s not a thing on your record we aren’t aware of. Though, Waller believes we can add to that list.”

I decided to hear him out. “Oh yeah? How so?”

“I’m sure you’ve heard of John Doe by now. Or ‘the Joker,’ if you prefer. He’s proven to be a menace these past few weeks, and the Agency is doing everything they can to detain him. Unfortunately, there’s just one problem.”

“Let me guess,” I said sarcastically, “it's Wayne?”

“Yes,” the agent replied, “but not in the way you’re thinking. Wayne is protecting John Doe. Hiding him. For whatever reason, he absolutely refuses to hand the man over to us...and you know how hard Batman fights. He’s caused more than a handful of troubles for Waller. Not to mention Gotham.”

“And how do I fit in all this?”

The man lowered his voice slightly, giving me an emotionless expression.

“You...are going to kill Bruce Wayne.”

I blinked a few times, bewildered by the response.

“...I’m sorry, you want me to assassinate Batman?”

The agent chuckled. “Don’t sound so modest. Waller thinks you’re capable, and she’s not easily impressed. Besides, you said it yourself. You almost killed him once before. Our organization sees you as our last chance of getting Batman out of the way, and locking John Doe up for good. We need your help.”

I rubbed my chin out of thought. “I see. And what if I say no?”

He persisted. “You don’t have a choice.”

I shrugged. “Pfft, guess I should’ve seen that coming. ...All right. I’ll do it. Ain’t like I’ve got other things to fill up my schedule. Very well. Where d’you want me to start?”

“Try distracting Batman,” he recommended. “If you can get his attention away from Doe for long enough, it’ll give us a window to act. But you have to be discreet. Understand? We don’t want Batman to know we’ve sent an assassin after him just yet.”

I nodded. “Leave it to me.”

The agent rose from his chair and straightened his suit, preparing to leave as dawn crept over the horizon.

“Very good,” he said, sounding pleased for the first time. “The Agency looks forward to working with you, Oswald. Don’t disappoint us...but I’m sure a man of your talents doesn’t need to worry about that. I’ll see you again soon.”

Just before he left, the agent looked back at me to say one last thing.

“Oh, and I’d pack your things if I were you. This is the final night you’ll be spending in Blackgate, after all. So, savor the moment. While you still can.”

I laughed. “On the contrary, I’ve been wanting to leave ever since the day I arrived. The Agency can’t get me out of here fast enough.”

The man smiled subtly, disappearing into the night’s darkness as he waved a short goodbye.

“We already have.”

[beneathshadowsrp]

The Crown of Shadows Results are in!

“And as the evening comes to a close, it’s time to announce the auction results. Once again, I am Carlton Cartwright and, judging from your bids, I think you all were just as impressed as I was with these impressive contestants and their wonderful dates. But, before we announce the winners and who will be taking home the Crown of Shadows, I want to remind ya’ll of where all of these proceeds are going to. The proceeds of this event are to help the Muttropawlitan keep strays off the streets and to instating a go green initiative around town. From cleaning up Wonderland Park to helping buildings such as All Saint’s Hospital be powered solely by Solar Energy panels, your donations will be a crucial to fixing up the town and, coming in at a whopping $17,205, will be able to not only clean up Wonderland Park and help out the Muttropawlitan, but build a dog park in town, install solar energy panels throughout All Saint’s Hospital, and go towards the funds to build a public pool. Thank you so much for your wonderful contributions and you’ll be sure to see your marvelous contributions come into effect soon. But, now for what you’re all been waiting for-”

Now that you’ve won your charity dates, feel free to play them out on the dash! Please feel free to reach out to your character’s date, plot OOC, and create threads surrounding it. You don’t have to create the date thread right away. So, feel free to take your time with and work together. If you want to wait to have your date thread after the full moon, by all means do that. And last but not least, have fun!! We’re so excited to announce the winners and we hope you are too!

The total amount of money raised from the charity event: $17,205

In Crown of Shadows Tradition, we will be awarding crowns to the top two highest bidders as a thank you for their generous donations. The crowns will bestowed upon them from the past years’ highest bidders and, come the next year, they will have the honor of passing the crowns down to the next winners:

The highest bidder who will win the Crown of Shadows (see image here): Mackenzie Foster

The runner up in highest bidder who will win the Princess tiara (see image here): Olivia Pierce

The Dates/Winners:

1: Amanda & Abby

2: Eliza & Sophie

3: Tae Cho & Juliet

4: James & Evie

5: Noah & Kenzie

6: Caitlin & Julian

7:  Natalia & Liv

8: Kelsie & Kai

9: Damien & Astrid

10: Jacen & Carter

11: Rowan & Ella

12: Griffin & Nina

13: Serena & Silas

14: Lia & Jasmine

And in case you forgot what the dates were...

The Date Breakdown/Recap once more:

Contestant #1 is... Amanda Weaver. She is:

Goofy, Energetic, and Adventurous.

She hates asparagus. Vehemently.

She doesn’t want to entirely spoil the surprise, but it will involve shopping and it will involve dinner. In that order.

The winner of this date is... Abby Barnes.

Contestant #2 is... Eliza Holmes. She is:

Kind, Protective, Creative.

She can dance really well, but she only does so in the safety and privacy of their home.

The date would consist of a picnic packed and made by the contestant, near the water, under that old willow tree everyone loves. Then she would enjoy taking you up to the lookout pointe, overlooking the town and the water close by, to enjoy some wine. And perhaps some good conversation under the stars.

The winner of this date is... Sophie Vidales.

Contestant #3 is... Tae Cho. He is:

Outgoing. Lovable. Spicy.

Madame Zeroni once predicted he wouldn’t finish college. ‘She’ was right.

Free dance lessons at Tiptoes, with your choice of salsa dancing or hip-hop. Followed by a picnic dinner under the stars where you can also watch Netflix on his iPad.

The winner of this date is... Juliet Reynolds.

Contestant #4 is... James Armstrong. He is:

Dutiful, Chivalrous, and Trustworthy.

“My dad’s dead, does that count?”

They will take you on a boat ride on the water, departing from the Harbor and making their way to the Falls. There, they will drop anchor and enjoy a pre-packaged meal next to the Falls. Pack a swimsuit if you want to take a dive.

The winner of this date is... Eve Martin.

Contestant #5 is... Noah Armstrong. He is:

Down to Earth, Fun-Loving, Goofy.

‘I can fit my whole fist in my mouth, wanna see?’

This date is a scavenger hunt comprised of recreating popular romcom moments together on a budget. The clues, such as an ode to “She’s the Man” where a present shows up on your doorstep with a wheel of gouda cheese in it, will lead you to your date whom will be hanging off the side of their roof from a bungee cord, wearing a Spiderman costume like in the OC and holding cue cards from the movie “Love Actually”, while a boombox sits below playing “Kiss Me” from Six Pence None the Richer. After finally cutting themselves down, your date will take you into the backyard where a projector will be playing “10 Things I Hate About You” onto a sheet that has been tapped to the side of the building to look like a screen. This contestant, also, would like you to know, that during the movie, popcorn, ring pops, and chocolate covered strawberries will be provided.

The winner of this date is... Mackenzie Foster.

Contestant #6 is... Caitlin Dunmore . She is:

Caring, Dedicated, Passionate.

They can randomly produce facts about certain things. Makes them really good for trivia games.

On this date, you will meet up to have either coffee or dinner than off to a painting class and end the day with ice cream and strolling through the town at dusk.

The winner of this date is... Julian St. Clair.

Contestant #7 is... Natalia Hamilton. She is:

Charismatic, Adventurous, & Dominate.

Can sing rather well & can make up little cheers due to their time as a cheerleader!

On their date, they would love to explore the town & woods while under the moon. After a walk around town, you will then be invited out to one of the many bars and spend the night dancing, eating, and drinking in a private section while enjoying each other’s company.

The winner of this date is... Olivia Pierce.

Contestant #8 is... Kelsie Woods. She is:

Cute, Quiet, & Loving.

They once won a radio call in contest by being the first person who could sing the alphabet backwards.

If you win you can look forward to a picnic at the Falls with all the traditional picnic fixings.  You two can eat, swim, and just enjoy a nice summer day.

The winner of this date is... Kai Papoa.

Contestant #9 is... Damien Pierce. He is:

Funny, Charismatic, Charming.

In our high schools production of Grease, I played Danny Zuko.

On our date, they will take you to a water/amusement park in Charlotte with an all access pass to all the rides and a VIP treatment with fast lane upgrades, free meals and a rental of our own cabana to sit and rest until you’re ready to hit the rides again.

The winner of this date is... Astrid Reyes.

Contestant #10 is... Jacen Todd. He is:

Sarcastic, Charming, Witty.

I’m a fan of Karaoke bars and frequent them every week.

On our date, they will take you to the local gun range and if you’re a first timer, teach you how to shoot, if not start up a friendly competition of who can best who on targets. After you’re done, dinner at the restaurant of your choice.

The winner of this date is... Carter Pierce.

Contestant #11 is... Rowan Hartman.  She is:

Serious, sweet, loyal.

I’m an expert knife thrower and kick ass at darts.

On our date, they will take you on a sunset cruise on Lake Norman on a private yacht. This date is complete with dinner, a Netflix movie of the bidder’s choice.

The winner of this date is... Ella Bahar.

Contestant #12 is... Griffin West. He is:

Adorable, Funny, and Resourceful.

Scared to death of porcelain dolls.

The date will involve a trip to the arcade, where you can play games, battle it out in laser tag, take a spin around the roller skating rink, or get behind the wheel to race in go-karts. There, you will also enjoy a private, candle lit dinner for two over pizza, nachos, and your choice of soda. Unlimited tokens will be provided, along with a guaranteed prize of your choosing.

The winner of this date is... Nina Skala.

Contestant #13 is... Serena North. She is:

Fun-loving, Adventurous, Independent

They’ve lived in more than 4 different countries.

While most of us have lived in this town forever most of us have taken for granted some of the the treasures that are hidden in this town. The day would be full of exploring them. Starting off with breakfast at The Pie Hole, then move on to the Boathouse where most of the day would be spent out on the water. When the fun in the sun was done the party could move to Level Up! for a quick round of air hockey and dinner. After the sun goes down the excitement begins with Moonlight Zip lining that ends at the Observatory where desert will be waiting.

The winner of this date is... Silas Bahar.

Contestant #14 is... Lia Diaz. She is:

Sweet, Ambitious & Cheerful.

They are ambidextrous.

This date will be a carefree night in. Start out by having fun splatter painting your date’s living room and each other with paint filled balloons. Then, just as the sun is about to set, watch the light stream in through the windows and illuminate your splatter painted work as you enjoy a home cooked meal and a bottle of wine of your choice on a picnic blanket spread out across the floor. Then your date will lead you into the backyard where twinkly lights are set up for a free salsa lesson and a chance to watch the stars.

The winner of this date is... Jasmine Morris.

[wineanddinosaur]

Morals Over Margins: A Blueprint for a More Equitable Hospitality Industry

The spring and summer of 2020 brought a reckoning for many Americans, with a global pandemic causing mass unemployment and the murder of George Floyd spurring protesters across the country to decry police violence against Black lives. For the restaurant industry, these events brought every failure and uncomfortable truth to the forefront — and exploited and jobless workers suddenly had plenty of time for such conversations.

Social media was flooded with infographics about the racist origins of tipping and the inequities that have kept the hospitality machine running in America since its birth at the blurry end of legalized slavery in this country. Capitalism itself was under a lens, the unfair concentration of power and profit magnified with every report of another billionaire doubling or tripling wealth. Replacing this economic and political system is a long shot, but anti-capitalist practices have existed in bars and restaurants for years now. So what does this look like, and why should everyone care?

Fair Wages

Capitalism is an economic system wherein the means of production of goods and services is privately owned rather than state-owned, with those private owners reaping the sole benefit of profits. That leaves the “means of production” — bartenders straining your Margarita and line cooks preparing your al dente pasta — in the hospitality industry exposed to exploitation thanks to notoriously slim margins for success. And since the hospitality industry, like most in this country, was built on the backs of Black people, it should be surprising to no one that the mistreatment of BIPOC, immigrant, and undocumented workers remains prevalent, despite their significant majority as employees in restaurants today.

One of the most basic ways an establishment can ensure the safety of its staff is by providing stable pay. Sadly, tipped workers who serve guests in bars and restaurants often make a subminimum wage, which is legal in all but seven states. Organizations like One Fair Wage seek to end this subminimum wage, but so have business owners.

In 2015, the practice of paying restaurant staff a higher but un-tipped wage cropped up noticeably. Prominent chefs like Alice Waters at Chez Panisse in Berkeley, Calif., began including service fees in guests’ checks in order to facilitate the change, while now-closed Bar Agricole in San Francisco raised its prices 20 percent to do the same. Chef Amanda Cohen was an early advocate for abolishing tipping in New York City when she adopted the practice at her Lower East Side location of Dirt Candy.

A Level Field

One of the most prominent supporters of the movement was Union Square Hospitality Group’s Danny Meyer, who announced back in 2015 that USHG would gradually end tipping and raise menu prices at all of its restaurants. Citing pay disparities between back- and front-of-house employees, which often fuels an unspoken feud between the two, the move to eliminate tipping at such a large and influential restaurant group convinced others to follow suit. This past summer, Meyer reversed the company’s “Hospitality Included” policy, meaning that servers at Gramercy Tavern and Union Square Cafe (to name just a couple) are once again working for tips.

Where Meyer posited that staff should benefit from guests wanting to tip generously in the wake of an economic crisis, Stephanie Watanabe, co-founder of Brooklyn wine bar Coast and Valley, found the opposite to be true. “We instituted a universal living wage, which was super important for us,” she says. “I think we did that in the summer after realizing that folks were not tipping.”

With tips plummeting, Watanabe and her partner Eric Hsu began to have the conversation about livable wages with their staff. “It really solidified for us when Covid hit: People before profits, period. It’s non-negotiable,” she says.

Thanks to her background in filmmaking in Hollywood, Watanabe brought outside perspectives to the argument against tipping, too. The “Most Favored Nations” clause utilized in movie contracts for smaller independent projects — paying the A-list celebrities the same amount as the supporting players — inspired her to try something similar. “We saw the dynamic between dining room and kitchen [employees], and it really bothered us,” says Watanabe of the tipped FOH/untipped BOH schism. “So for me, this was a way to level that and say, ‘No. We’re not going to pay this person less because somehow their job is deemed less valuable than the person who is able to go to get their WSET [Wine & Spirit Education Trust certification].’”

The friction between staff, coupled with the usual caveats of tipping — tipped workers experience higher rates of sexual harassment and people of color are tipped less than their white coworkers — led to a discussion with staff about experimenting with a fixed wage. “We understand the deep roots that tipping has and how ultimately, it’s incredibly, incredibly harmful and racist, and that doesn’t sit well,” Watanabe says. “Every single person, including the owner, gets paid $25 an hour.” This anti-capitalist strategy, which values humans over money, brings her staff equality and stability. It is not, however, an easy way to run a business in America.

“Every month, we’re losing money. But we’re like, ‘and?’” says Watanabe. “Then so be it, then our business can’t survive. Period. And that’s a shame, but it’s also a function of capitalism and society and these systems and structures that exist.”

With profit margins hovering around 1 percent at places like Coast and Valley right now, most investors would be hesitant to risk it all, but many of Watanabe and Hsu’s backers are friends and family who truly believe in their vision. The team recognizes the real struggle that most bars face. “There are good folks out there, and the problem isn’t [that] owners don’t want to pay their people. Some of the time, it’s that they can’t,” Watanabe says.

Even for the big players, a seemingly minimal loss in income might come with strings attached. “Who knows if they’ve got investors and people that they’re beholden to that don’t share their commitment to those things?” Watanabe says. “Then oftentimes, you don’t have a lot of control over it. And that’s where capitalism kind of just comes in and wreaks havoc.”

Nobody is saying that flouting our capitalist tendencies is painless. “To do the right thing is really, really, really hard in this world that we live in,” Watanabe says. “I think it’s like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. But for Eric and I, … we can’t violate our own integrity, and so maybe that means we’re bad business people. And at the end of the day, I’d rather be a bad business person than a bad person.”

A High Road

Andrea Borgen Abdallah, owner of Barcito & Bodega in Los Angeles, was once a general manager at Union Square Hospitality Group’s Blue Smoke in Battery Park City, Calif. “I became really interested in that model and what it hopes to achieve — especially when it came to dealing with the inequity between kitchen staff and waitstaff,” she says. Borgen Abdallah followed USHG’s lead and did away with tipping less than a year after Barcito’s September 2015 opening.

Thanks to the restaurant’s proximity to the L.A. Convention Center, Borgen Abdallah noticed business was very cyclical. “[On a] Monday, I would out-sell a Friday night, and there was no method to the madness,” she says. But eliminating tipping created stability for her employees, ensuring that shifts would be predictably fruitful on any given day. “I was also able to introduce healthcare as a result of that,” Borgen Abdallah says — no small feat, given that the Affordable Care Act only requires insurance to be offered if an establishment has a larger staff of 50 or more full-time employees.

In March of 2020, with the shutdowns brought upon by the rise of Covid in the U.S., Borgen Abdallah closed her restaurant and made two important decisions. First, Barcito would continue to pay for the health insurance of its furloughed employees. Second, it would keep jobs available for anyone lacking a solid safety net. In this way, even though the restaurant was unable to provide the same hours, it was able to keep its doors open and its vulnerable staff cared for.

Last year, Barcito was also one of the first restaurants to participate in High Road Kitchens — a group of restaurants working to provide food on a sliding scale to low-wage workers, healthcare workers, and others in need. One Fair Wage, which fights to end subminimum wages nationwide, oversees the program through RAISE (Restaurants Advancing Industry Standards in Employment). Participating High Road Restaurants like Barcito commit to advocating for fair wages and increased racial and gender equity through hiring, training, and promotional practices.

Borgen Abdallah’s dedication to the fight for better wages began while working directly for One Fair Wage in the past, even making trips to Washington, D.C., and her commitment doesn’t seem to be waning. “I think this pandemic certainly exacerbated a lot of the issues that we’ve had for a really long time,” she says. “And I think a lot of people wanted to sweep [them] under the rug and finally were forced to reconcile.” Now, with all that is known about the instability of a life reliant on tips without guaranteed access to healthcare, paid leave, and other benefits, real change could be on the horizon.

The Hope

It has been one year since the start of the pandemic, and the cry of the overworked and underinsured is once again becoming just a murmur. An increase in vaccine availability quiets much of the fear of going back to a job where contracting Covid remains a danger, but bar and restaurant workers are still far from safe. Returning to work during a national emergency can be confusing, adding new ways for management to exploit staff such as through unsafe Covid practices, unexplained pay changes, and denial of federally required paid sick leave. After so much loss and disruption, mental health is suffering, and affordable insurance is often still tied to employment. One look at the long list of resources put together by the Restaurant Workers Community Foundation, a nonprofit created by and for restaurant workers, gives some insight into just how vastly workers’ lives have been and continue to be affected.

With the passing of President Biden’s latest Covid relief package, small restaurants received access to $28.6 billion in grants, but a $15 federal minimum wage amendment failed. “I think people kind of started to talk about [issues for restaurants],” observes Watanabe, “but it was just like ‘bailout bailout bailout!’ But … that’s not going to cut it anymore.”

Last month, Barcito was able to get all of its employees vaccinated against Covid. As eligibility opens up to the rest of the public, a new normalcy feels within reach. But the sense of urgency to repair broken systems within hospitality threatens to dwindle. “I feel like it has kind of started to fall to the wayside,” Borgen Abdallah says. “The light at the end of the tunnel gets brighter and brighter, and I think it’s just important that we [have] those conversations and that that continues to feel really urgent.”

Anti-capitalist methods can actually work well within our capitalist society, even beyond championing workers’ rights through ensuring stable wages, paid time off, health care, or shared ownership opportunities. American bars and restaurants will need to look at sustainability and minimizing harm not just to people, but to the environment. Ambitious bar programs that are eliminating plastics — eco-friendly paper, metal, bamboo, and even hay straws have become standard — tackling water usage, and targeting waste by focusing on the creative use of what most might toss out have a real chance to lead the way as well.

“I’m hopeful, but I also am disappointed in the industry,” says Watanabe. “I feel like we’ve had a year where we could have addressed some really deep problematic systemic problems in this industry.” Businesses must look frankly once again at where they are lacking in response to the racism, sexism, and ableism that has pervaded hospitality since its early beginnings in this country. If capitalism benefits from white supremacy, then now is the time to challenge them both. “Ultimately, it’s not just about hospitality,” Watanabe says. “This is happening all over the place, and there’s a lot of reckonings happening. It’s really about changing the way we do business to be more conscious, to be more people-centered, to be more thoughtful.”

2020 may have broken us down with its harsh realities, shuttering more than 110,000 bars and restaurants nationwide, but as long as we can keep the momentum of learning and reimagining a better future for this industry — one where it values lives over profits — there is hope. “It’s been a tough year,” says Borgen Abdallah. “I think a lot of it could have been avoided had we done things differently, and I don’t think reverting back to the old way of doing things is the answer.”

The article Morals Over Margins: A Blueprint for a More Equitable Hospitality Industry appeared first on VinePair.

source https://vinepair.com/articles/anti-capitalism-hospitality/

[johnboothus]

Morals Over Margins: A Blueprint for a More Equitable Hospitality Industry

The spring and summer of 2020 brought a reckoning for many Americans, with a global pandemic causing mass unemployment and the murder of George Floyd spurring protesters across the country to decry police violence against Black lives. For the restaurant industry, these events brought every failure and uncomfortable truth to the forefront — and exploited and jobless workers suddenly had plenty of time for such conversations.

Social media was flooded with infographics about the racist origins of tipping and the inequities that have kept the hospitality machine running in America since its birth at the blurry end of legalized slavery in this country. Capitalism itself was under a lens, the unfair concentration of power and profit magnified with every report of another billionaire doubling or tripling wealth. Replacing this economic and political system is a long shot, but anti-capitalist practices have existed in bars and restaurants for years now. So what does this look like, and why should everyone care?

Fair Wages

Capitalism is an economic system wherein the means of production of goods and services is privately owned rather than state-owned, with those private owners reaping the sole benefit of profits. That leaves the “means of production” — bartenders straining your Margarita and line cooks preparing your al dente pasta — in the hospitality industry exposed to exploitation thanks to notoriously slim margins for success. And since the hospitality industry, like most in this country, was built on the backs of Black people, it should be surprising to no one that the mistreatment of BIPOC, immigrant, and undocumented workers remains prevalent, despite their significant majority as employees in restaurants today.

One of the most basic ways an establishment can ensure the safety of its staff is by providing stable pay. Sadly, tipped workers who serve guests in bars and restaurants often make a subminimum wage, which is legal in all but seven states. Organizations like One Fair Wage seek to end this subminimum wage, but so have business owners.

In 2015, the practice of paying restaurant staff a higher but un-tipped wage cropped up noticeably. Prominent chefs like Alice Waters at Chez Panisse in Berkeley, Calif., began including service fees in guests’ checks in order to facilitate the change, while now-closed Bar Agricole in San Francisco raised its prices 20 percent to do the same. Chef Amanda Cohen was an early advocate for abolishing tipping in New York City when she adopted the practice at her Lower East Side location of Dirt Candy.

A Level Field

One of the most prominent supporters of the movement was Union Square Hospitality Group’s Danny Meyer, who announced back in 2015 that USHG would gradually end tipping and raise menu prices at all of its restaurants. Citing pay disparities between back- and front-of-house employees, which often fuels an unspoken feud between the two, the move to eliminate tipping at such a large and influential restaurant group convinced others to follow suit. This past summer, Meyer reversed the company’s “Hospitality Included” policy, meaning that servers at Gramercy Tavern and Union Square Cafe (to name just a couple) are once again working for tips.

Where Meyer posited that staff should benefit from guests wanting to tip generously in the wake of an economic crisis, Stephanie Watanabe, co-founder of Brooklyn wine bar Coast and Valley, found the opposite to be true. “We instituted a universal living wage, which was super important for us,” she says. “I think we did that in the summer after realizing that folks were not tipping.”

With tips plummeting, Watanabe and her partner Eric Hsu began to have the conversation about livable wages with their staff. “It really solidified for us when Covid hit: People before profits, period. It’s non-negotiable,” she says.

Thanks to her background in filmmaking in Hollywood, Watanabe brought outside perspectives to the argument against tipping, too. The “Most Favored Nations” clause utilized in movie contracts for smaller independent projects — paying the A-list celebrities the same amount as the supporting players — inspired her to try something similar. “We saw the dynamic between dining room and kitchen [employees], and it really bothered us,” says Watanabe of the tipped FOH/untipped BOH schism. “So for me, this was a way to level that and say, ‘No. We’re not going to pay this person less because somehow their job is deemed less valuable than the person who is able to go to get their WSET [Wine & Spirit Education Trust certification].’”

The friction between staff, coupled with the usual caveats of tipping — tipped workers experience higher rates of sexual harassment and people of color are tipped less than their white coworkers — led to a discussion with staff about experimenting with a fixed wage. “We understand the deep roots that tipping has and how ultimately, it’s incredibly, incredibly harmful and racist, and that doesn’t sit well,” Watanabe says. “Every single person, including the owner, gets paid $25 an hour.” This anti-capitalist strategy, which values humans over money, brings her staff equality and stability. It is not, however, an easy way to run a business in America.

“Every month, we’re losing money. But we’re like, ‘and?’” says Watanabe. “Then so be it, then our business can’t survive. Period. And that’s a shame, but it’s also a function of capitalism and society and these systems and structures that exist.”

With profit margins hovering around 1 percent at places like Coast and Valley right now, most investors would be hesitant to risk it all, but many of Watanabe and Hsu’s backers are friends and family who truly believe in their vision. The team recognizes the real struggle that most bars face. “There are good folks out there, and the problem isn’t [that] owners don’t want to pay their people. Some of the time, it’s that they can’t,” Watanabe says.

Even for the big players, a seemingly minimal loss in income might come with strings attached. “Who knows if they’ve got investors and people that they’re beholden to that don’t share their commitment to those things?” Watanabe says. “Then oftentimes, you don’t have a lot of control over it. And that’s where capitalism kind of just comes in and wreaks havoc.”

Nobody is saying that flouting our capitalist tendencies is painless. “To do the right thing is really, really, really hard in this world that we live in,” Watanabe says. “I think it’s like you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place. But for Eric and I, … we can’t violate our own integrity, and so maybe that means we’re bad business people. And at the end of the day, I’d rather be a bad business person than a bad person.”

A High Road

Andrea Borgen Abdallah, owner of Barcito & Bodega in Los Angeles, was once a general manager at Union Square Hospitality Group’s Blue Smoke in Battery Park City, Calif. “I became really interested in that model and what it hopes to achieve — especially when it came to dealing with the inequity between kitchen staff and waitstaff,” she says. Borgen Abdallah followed USHG’s lead and did away with tipping less than a year after Barcito’s September 2015 opening.

Thanks to the restaurant’s proximity to the L.A. Convention Center, Borgen Abdallah noticed business was very cyclical. “[On a] Monday, I would out-sell a Friday night, and there was no method to the madness,” she says. But eliminating tipping created stability for her employees, ensuring that shifts would be predictably fruitful on any given day. “I was also able to introduce healthcare as a result of that,” Borgen Abdallah says — no small feat, given that the Affordable Care Act only requires insurance to be offered if an establishment has a larger staff of 50 or more full-time employees.

In March of 2020, with the shutdowns brought upon by the rise of Covid in the U.S., Borgen Abdallah closed her restaurant and made two important decisions. First, Barcito would continue to pay for the health insurance of its furloughed employees. Second, it would keep jobs available for anyone lacking a solid safety net. In this way, even though the restaurant was unable to provide the same hours, it was able to keep its doors open and its vulnerable staff cared for.

Last year, Barcito was also one of the first restaurants to participate in High Road Kitchens — a group of restaurants working to provide food on a sliding scale to low-wage workers, healthcare workers, and others in need. One Fair Wage, which fights to end subminimum wages nationwide, oversees the program through RAISE (Restaurants Advancing Industry Standards in Employment). Participating High Road Restaurants like Barcito commit to advocating for fair wages and increased racial and gender equity through hiring, training, and promotional practices.

Borgen Abdallah’s dedication to the fight for better wages began while working directly for One Fair Wage in the past, even making trips to Washington, D.C., and her commitment doesn’t seem to be waning. “I think this pandemic certainly exacerbated a lot of the issues that we’ve had for a really long time,” she says. “And I think a lot of people wanted to sweep [them] under the rug and finally were forced to reconcile.” Now, with all that is known about the instability of a life reliant on tips without guaranteed access to healthcare, paid leave, and other benefits, real change could be on the horizon.

The Hope

It has been one year since the start of the pandemic, and the cry of the overworked and underinsured is once again becoming just a murmur. An increase in vaccine availability quiets much of the fear of going back to a job where contracting Covid remains a danger, but bar and restaurant workers are still far from safe. Returning to work during a national emergency can be confusing, adding new ways for management to exploit staff such as through unsafe Covid practices, unexplained pay changes, and denial of federally required paid sick leave. After so much loss and disruption, mental health is suffering, and affordable insurance is often still tied to employment. One look at the long list of resources put together by the Restaurant Workers Community Foundation, a nonprofit created by and for restaurant workers, gives some insight into just how vastly workers’ lives have been and continue to be affected.

With the passing of President Biden’s latest Covid relief package, small restaurants received access to $28.6 billion in grants, but a $15 federal minimum wage amendment failed. “I think people kind of started to talk about [issues for restaurants],” observes Watanabe, “but it was just like ‘bailout bailout bailout!’ But … that’s not going to cut it anymore.”

Last month, Barcito was able to get all of its employees vaccinated against Covid. As eligibility opens up to the rest of the public, a new normalcy feels within reach. But the sense of urgency to repair broken systems within hospitality threatens to dwindle. “I feel like it has kind of started to fall to the wayside,” Borgen Abdallah says. “The light at the end of the tunnel gets brighter and brighter, and I think it’s just important that we [have] those conversations and that that continues to feel really urgent.”

Anti-capitalist methods can actually work well within our capitalist society, even beyond championing workers’ rights through ensuring stable wages, paid time off, health care, or shared ownership opportunities. American bars and restaurants will need to look at sustainability and minimizing harm not just to people, but to the environment. Ambitious bar programs that are eliminating plastics — eco-friendly paper, metal, bamboo, and even hay straws have become standard — tackling water usage, and targeting waste by focusing on the creative use of what most might toss out have a real chance to lead the way as well.

“I’m hopeful, but I also am disappointed in the industry,” says Watanabe. “I feel like we’ve had a year where we could have addressed some really deep problematic systemic problems in this industry.” Businesses must look frankly once again at where they are lacking in response to the racism, sexism, and ableism that has pervaded hospitality since its early beginnings in this country. If capitalism benefits from white supremacy, then now is the time to challenge them both. “Ultimately, it’s not just about hospitality,” Watanabe says. “This is happening all over the place, and there’s a lot of reckonings happening. It’s really about changing the way we do business to be more conscious, to be more people-centered, to be more thoughtful.”

2020 may have broken us down with its harsh realities, shuttering more than 110,000 bars and restaurants nationwide, but as long as we can keep the momentum of learning and reimagining a better future for this industry — one where it values lives over profits — there is hope. “It’s been a tough year,” says Borgen Abdallah. “I think a lot of it could have been avoided had we done things differently, and I don’t think reverting back to the old way of doing things is the answer.”

The article Morals Over Margins: A Blueprint for a More Equitable Hospitality Industry appeared first on VinePair.

Via https://vinepair.com/articles/anti-capitalism-hospitality/

source https://vinology1.weebly.com/blog/morals-over-margins-a-blueprint-for-a-more-equitable-hospitality-industry

[samwinlover-blog]

Probable Fear Of Abandonment

Pairing: Sam x reader Characters: Sam, Dean, the reader Warnings: injured!reader, hospitals, swearing, angst Request: The reader and the Winchesters have hunted together for years, but when the reader is hospitalized and the Winchesters have to go save the world they leave her behind. The plan was for the separation to be temporary, but when the reader wakes up earlier than the doctors thought she would and sees the Winchesters gone, she thinks they left her. So, with both her heart and a few bones broken. she moves on with her life and starts hunting solo. Years later, fate will bring the three of them together again. On an impossible hunt, not only will the reader see her ex-boyfriend, Sam, but his brother again too!  A/N: Hey guys, sorry I’ve been really inactive lately I’ve had a lot on my plate:( But anyways, I really hope you enjoy this one- I put a ton of work into it because I feel really bad for being so inactive! <3 Tag list:  @amanda-teaches@myplaceofthingsilove@spectaculicious@bambinovak@bambinovak@writingthingsisdifficult@padackles2010@mamaredd123@milkymilky-cocopuff@iwantthedean@zeppo-in-a-trenchcoat@spntrista @d-s-winchester@just-another-busy-fangirl@winchesterprincessbride@waywardjoy@supernaturalyobsessed@whywhydoyouwantmetosaymyname@sandlee44@fangirl1802@kittenofdoomage@evyiione@winchestersmut@purgatoan@mogaruke@therewillbeblood@megansescape@taste-of-dean@leatherwhiskeycoffeeplaid @scarlet-soldier-in-an-impala@deathtonormalcy56@wildfirewinchester@notnaturalanahi@jensen-jarpad@impalaimagining@fangirlextraordinaire@itseverythingilike@jesspfly@love@mysteriouslyme81@mrswhozeewhatsis@aiaranradnay@supernatural-jackles@girl-next-door-writes @spnsasha @27bmm @spnfanficpond @amanda-teaches@myplaceofthingsilove@spectaculicious@bambinovak@writingthingsisdifficult@spn-imagines-to-feel@spn-ficfanatic​@cleverdame@saxxxology@jensen-jarpad@keepcalmandcarryondean gabriels-trix 

You didn’t want it to end the way it did, with you passed out in a hospital bed and the Winchesters driving off to God knows where in the Impala. They’d left you, but it didn’t make any sense. Sam was in love with you, and Dean was your best friend- or so you thought- so why would they leave? 

When you first woke up, the emptiness of the room scared you more than anything else. All of the tubes and wires the hospital had you hooked up to were nothing compared to the quiet of that god awful room. There wasn’t anybody at your side, Sam wasn’t there holding your hand and Dean wasn’t hovering uncomfortably by the door like he should have been. It was just empty, with nothing but the steady beeping of your monitor to keep you company. 

But you weren’t alone for long- the second you called out for help, dozens of nurses and doctors rushed to your side. They checked your vitals and asked you millions of questions, commenting on how miraculous it was that you’d woken up so quickly. All of the faces peering down at you were those of strangers though, and you’d never felt more alone. 

Your first instinct had been that the Winchesters were hurt too, and that was why they weren’t by your side. But when you’d croaked out the question initially, all you had gotten were looks of pity. 

A raven-haired nurse with a big nose had broken the news, “Honey, they left a few days ago, we haven’t seen them since I’m so sorry” She’d said, and it had crushed you. 

At first you didn’t understand, or just couldn’t comprehend that the Winchesters would leave you, especially Sam. He’d been your boyfriend of three years at the time, and also the love of your life. The two of you were supposed to do everything regular couples did, like get married or move into a four bedroom flat in a quiet neighborhood. So, naturally, you would never have predicted him leaving you to die in a rundown hospital in Rhode Island. 

The hours after you first woke up were some of the worst of your life, and that was saying something. Heartbreak was nothing knew, being that you were a hunter, but somehow Sam’s betrayal- along with his brothers- stung a little more than everything else. The nurses pity made you want to scream, but you held your tongue. You let them poke and prod at you to no end, and kept quiet the entire time. 

Under normal circumstances, you definitely would have snapped at somebody. But you were having trouble adjusting, and really comprehending the fact that the Winchesters were gone. 

It really shouldn’t have been such a surprise though. With the threat of Lucifer looming, and the angels recruiting Dean as Michaels vessel, you should have known they’d choose saving the world (again) over you. Because that was the Winchester family brand apparently, “Save the world as many times as we screw it up, and hope nobody gets killed in the process.”

When the initial numbness had worn off and you truly understood that they were gone, and out of your life forever, you got angry. You hated them, hated their name and who they were, but mostly, you hated Sam. 

You hated the fact that he abandoned you without so much as leaving a note. You got no explanation of any sorts as to why he up and left you, bruised and broken, in a decrepit hospital you’d never been to before. 

That anger, white hot and uncontrollable, was what got you through rehabilitation. With no health insurance, two broken ribs, a severe concussion, and a broken leg, it had been nearly impossible to get yourself back on your feet. 

You didn’t remember anything in the 48 hours leading up to the accident, and that included the motel you were staying at, where your car was, what state you were in, and why you were there in the first place. It was just your luck that your phone, with all your contacts, was with the Winchesters when they left. Because leaving you to die clearly wasn’t enough, they had to take all of your personal belongings with them of course. 

The second those pity-eyed nurses had cleared you, you’d left. Buying a bus ticket back to Massachusetts, where you were born, seemed like the only reasonable thing to do, and you stayed with your sister until you were fully healed. 

Honestly, it was a miracle you’d been able to get yourself back home in the first place. With no money and a lot of broken bones, stealing a bus ticket had been nearly impossible, and sitting through a jerky bus ride had been even worse. 

But a few hours later, you found yourself on your sister, Monica’s, front porch. Being as the two of you hadn’t seen each other in three years, it was fair to say that she was shocked at your arrival. 

Monica, and the rest of your family, had always been convinced that Sam was abusive- what else would they make of the countless bruises and broken bones your job gave you on a daily basis? So when Monica found you, crutching yourself up to her doorstep, she assumed the worse. 

She’d flung the door open and hurried you inside, muttering, “What has he done to you?!” the entire time. 

A few days later, once you’d rested and she’d gotten you a prescription for some pain medication, Monica wanted to know what happened. But you refused to tell her, or anyone else for that matter. It was a combination of you not wanting to have to make up an elaborate lie, and just not wanting to talk about it. 

Your heart was broken, by the WInchester’s betrayal- both of their betrayals. While Sam had been the love of your life, Dean was your best friend. He was the person you’d get rip-roaring drunk and dance on dive bar tables with. And you were his wing woman, constantly deceiving young blondes into spending the night with him. But more importantly, you were each others rocks. All of the good and the bad and the ugly of the Winchesters you knew, and not because of Sam. Dean was the one who’d bare his soul to you, no matter how much he hated getting emotional. And while Sam would tell you things, Dean was the brother who told you everything. 

Six months after your sister had welcomed you into her home with open arms, you’d done the same thing you did three years ago: you ran away. You felt that itch beneath your skin and that need to get your hands dirty, tell tale signs of a hunter who’s been out of the fight for too long. The second your ribs and legs had healed you took off, stealing a 1964 Black Jeep and driving until morning. 

The Winchesters became nothing more than a sad chapter in your life, and you tried to forget about them. You tried so hard, in fact, that you refused to contact any of your mutual friends. Shutting out Bobby, and Ellen and Joe were one of your biggest regrets. But as the years flew by, you found it harder and harder to bring yourself to pick up the phone and call, because you knew there was a possibility that the Winchesters would be there with them. 

A year passed, and the world never ended- so you assumed Sam and Dean had once again saved it. But you didn’t know where that put the two of them, were they dead? The plan had always been for Sam to fight off Lucifer at the last minute, but you didn’t know if he’d actually done it. You tried to put the thought of them out of your head, and over time your wounds healed- you even fell in love again. Well, you wouldn’t exactly call it love. 

Robby was nice, and he made you reasonably happy. He was a florist from New Hampshire, who had no idea what you really did for a living, and would probably have a heart attack if he ever found out. You didn’t know if he was oblivious or just choosing to be, but you’d somehow managed to convince him that you sold software for a living- and that was why you were away so much. Robby was a quaint man living in a small town, hell, he even rode his bicycle to work everyday. And even though, deep down, you knew you didn’t love him, he was exactly the type of person you needed in your life, so you chose to stay. But every single defense mechanism, including Robby, you’d put into place in order to avoid the Winchesters forever was foiled by fate. 

During a particularly chilly October, two years after the accident, you were on a case in Vermont. It seemed to be just a typical werewolf problem, being as bodies were turning up left and right with their hearts ripped out, and you weren’t prepared for just how much that case would change your life. You were strolling down the produce section of the town’s local grocery store, inspecting a carton of strawberries, when you saw him again. 

Sam Winchester. 

Without realizing what you were doing, the berries slipped from your hands and rolled across the floor. But you didn’t bend down to pick them up, you just stood there utterly dumbfounded. 

As if the two of you had rehearsed it, his head turned in your direction the second you dropped the strawberries, and his eyes locked on you. 

Words couldn’t describe the look on his face, but it probably matched your own. His eyes went wide and his hands fell limp at his sides, as if he too was dumbstruck to see you again after all those years and all that heartbreak. But then he did something you had not. His eyes went shiny from tears and he started walking towards you. 

His steps were slow, and deliberate, as if he didn’t completely believe you were real. But you didn’t want to see him, you didn’t even want to talk to him. Sam had made his choice all those years ago, and he’d chosen to leave you. 

So, stumbling back into the woman behind you, you backed away from him. You whirled around, using a shelf of carrots for support, and ran down the isle. In a frenzy of emotion, you couldn’t even see straight, and knocked into so many stands and hurrying people on your way out the store. 

When he finally called after you, it was more of a sob than it was a yell. His voice was strained as he choked out, “(Y/N), please!” 

But all he got in return were the sound of your boots slapping against the pavement of the parking lot, as you sprinted out of the store and away from him. You didn’t even know where you were going, only that you needed to leave, but he followed you and wouldn’t let up- all the while yelling your name like a prayer. 

[sentrava]

To Try in 2019: The Best New Restaurants, Cafes, and Bars in Copenhagen

Copenhagen’s food and drink scene is in no danger of slowing down; there have been a consistent number of new openings that prove the capital city is as much a culinary hotspot as ever before.

Some locations are opened to much fanfare (there was a line outside of Hart Bageri for weeks!), while others open more quietly and build a fanbase over time.

These are the best new restaurants, cafes, and bars in Copenhagen:

Restaurants

noma

The new iteration of noma opened this year to much acclaim (naturally). With a new location and a gorgeous interior designed by Studio David Thulstrup, noma proved once again why it’s been considered one of the best restaurants in the world for years, and its reopening was greatly anticipated. noma now bases its menu on three seasons – vegetable season, seafood season, and forest & game season – changing the menu drastically to suit the ingredients that come with each season. A meal there consists of 20 courses.

Expert tip

If you’re a student, you can get a full meal there for only 1.000 DKK. Yes that’s expensive by most standards, but its less than half of what you’d normally pay!

noma

Refshalevej 96 1432 København K

Opening Hours: Sun & Mon Closed Tues – Sat 5:00 pm – midnight

    Barabba

This spiffy Italian eatery and bar was an immediate hit; partly because the food and drink is delicious, but also partly because it’s one of the only restaurants to stay open until 2 am, making it the go-to spot for chefs who get off work late. The vibe in here is friendly and fun, and the menu is top-quality Italian dishes that feel comfortable but gourmet.

Barbarra

Store Kongensgade 34 1264 København K

Opening Hours: Mon & Tues Closed Weds & Thurs 6:00 pm – 1:00 am Fri – Sun 6:00 pm – 2:00 am

    Mission CPH

Mission mixes Californian and Mediterranean sensibilities for a casual but delicious menu. The focus is on pizza and pasta. Enjoy sizeable dishes, local ingredients, and the gorgeous location at The Standard overlooking the harbour. This is one of Claus Meyers’ latest restaurants and, as with his other endeavours, it doesn’t disappoint; good food at fair prices and a laid-back atmosphere.

Mission CPH

The Standard Havnegade 44 1058 København K

Opening Hours: Sun – Tues Closed Thurs – Sat Lunch 12:00 – 3:30 pm Weds – Sat Dinner 5:30 – 10:00 pm

    Tigermom

Opened by Relæ-alum Lisa Liv, Tigermom is the result of years of successful pop-ups and has been hotly anticipated. The menu is family-style Asian-inspired cuisine and a kickass range of cocktails. Worried that the dishes won’t be spicy enough? No problem; there’s a chilli pairing for your menu! Check this place out for something truly different and special.

Tigermom

Ryesgade 25 2200 København N

Opening Hours: Sun – Tues Closed Weds – Sat 5:30 – 10:00 pm

    Restaurant Alouette

Housed in a converted pencil factory, this contemporary American restaurant has wowed Copenhagen since it opened. With a regularly-changing five course menu and an almost comically beautiful interior, Alouette is set to be one of the big culinary draws for Copenhagen in 2019. They are home to a monthly pop-up called Naim Nights; the kitchen is closed but there’s live music and you can buy drinks at the bar. If Alouette is generally out of your price range (it’s 695 DKK for the menu without drinks), Naim Nights is a good place to start!

Restaurant Alouette

Sturlasgade 14P, 1 sal 2300 København S

Opening Hours: Sun – Weds Closed Thurs – Sat Dinner (reservation only)

    Restaurant Iluka

noma-alum Beau Clugsman’s seafood and vegetable restaurant presents the kind of dishes so beautiful you’ll be reluctant to eat…but you definitely should. The food is outstanding. Copenhagen was in need of a truly daring seafood restaurant, and this one is sure to stick around for a while.

Restaurant Iluka

Peder Skrams Gade 15 1054 København K

Opening Hours: Thurs – Mon 5:30 pm – midnight Tues & Weds Closed

    Bar Pasta

Delicious, big helpings of pasta and other Italian delights for reasonable prices; it’s no wonder Bar Pasta has become a popular place for dinner and drinks in Nørrebro. Don’t forget the tiramisu at the end of the night!

Bar Pasta

Vedbækgade 13 2200 København N

Opening Hours: Mon – Sat 5:00 – 10:00 pm Sun Closed

    The Blues Woman

American Southern food cooked with expert flavor profiles and a lot of passion; you’ll definitely want to try The Blues Woman when she finally opens up on 2019. Chef Amanda Yee’s successful pop-up in Vesterbro this year has us all yearning for more (we’ll take one million of those perfectly mixed Bloody Marys, thanks). The menu is unique in Copenhagen, yet each dish feels like home.

The Blues Woman

No location currently; keep an eye on their Instagram and Facebook for updates in 2019!

    Motley

Just as the name says, the menu at this casual eatery is indeed motley. With their “dish of the day” ranging from curry to chilli con carne to duck confit to Moroccan aubergine, and a range of small snacks and drinks, Motley is an ideal place for a relaxed meal with friends or a quiet night on your own.

Motley

Ryesgade 30B 2200 København N

Opening Hours: Mon – Thurs 4:00 – 10:00 pm Fri & Sat 4:00 pm – midnight Sun 4:00 – 9:00 pm

    Hot Pot Republic

Get ready to warm up. After a lengthy and successful pop-up, Hot Pot Republic has become a permanent fixture on Vesterbrogade. The idea is to eat socially; each meal consists of a pot of broth in the centre of the table, and then vegetables and meats are added as desired, with the overall flavors coming from a variety of Asian cuisines including Chinese, Korean, and Japanese. Choose your base broth and additional ingredients to create your own speech hot pot. This is a perfect winter meal with friends – and very affordable too!

Hot Pot Republic

Vesterbrogade 146 1620 København V

Opening Hours: Mon Closed Tues – Fri 5:30 – 11:00 pm Sat & Sun 12:00 – 3:00 pm

      Cafes & Bakeries

Hart Bageri

Tartine’s Richard Hart and noma’s René Redzepi teamed up to open a bakery in Copenhagen and people went as totally bonkers for it as one would imagine. But, they’re not wrong. Both the pastries and breads are excellent (if a little pricey). The space is small, so you can either grab a quick coffee or take away; it’s not really a place to set up your laptop and spend the morning. Be prepared to wait for your goodies – the line is often quite long.

Hart Bageri

Gammel Kongevej 109 1850 Frederiksberg

Opening Hours: Mon – Fri 7:30 am – 6:00 pm Sat & Sun 8:00 am – 4:00 pm

    Lille Bakery

Lille is an artisanal bakery and cafe in a large industrial space on Refshaleøen. They serve up hearty salads and open face sandwiches on fresh bread, as well as a range of fantastic pastries. The real stuff? Their doughnuts are outrageous; fluffy berliners filled with things like bay leaf cream. We just wish they packaged their doughnuts to-go a little better (they just throw ’em in a bag), so we could take more of them home!

Lille Bakery

Refshalevej 213B 1432 København K

Opening Hours: Mon & Tues Closed Weds – Sun 8:00 am – 5:00 pm

    Broens Gadekøkken

On the bridge between Nyhavn and Refshaleøen, you’ll find the open-air market Broens Gadekøkken (The Bridge Street Kitchen). There’s lots of communal seating and offerings from Gasoline Grill, California Kitchen, Coffee Collective, and many more Copenhagen hotspots. When the weather is good, this is the spot to be!

Broens Gadekøkken

Strandgade 95 1401 Copenhagen K

Opening Hours: Every day 11:00 am – 10:00 pm

Coffee Collective & GRØD Opening Hours Mon – Fri 8:00 am – 10:00 pm Sat & Sun 9:00 am – 10:00 pm

NB: Broens Gadekøkken is closed from 24th December – 1st April.

    Coffee Collective Bernikow

The best coffee roastery in Copenhagen opened their fourth shop this year. It’s in the centre of the city, hidden in a small alley, in a location that was once an old, smokey bodega. They serve coffee, of course, as well as coffee kombucha and coffee cocktails in the evening.

Coffee Collective Bernikow

Kristen Bernikows Gade 2 1105 København K, Denmark.

Opening Hours: Mon – Fri 7:00 am – 7:00 pm Sat 9:00 am – 7:00 pm Sun 9:00 am – 6:00 pm

    Andersen & Maillard

A bakery, cafe, and roastery in Nørrebro with a soft minimalist interior and a seriously good array of pastries and coffee drinks. Their in-house roasted coffee is great, but you must try their kougin amaan.

Andersen & Maillard

Nørrebrogade 62 2200 København N

Opening Hours: Every day 7:00 am – 7:00 pm

    Kafeteria at Statens Museum for Kunst

It’s hard to find a more beautiful space than Kafeteria at Statens Museum for Kunst. This cafe is located on the ground floor of the national museum and is both artistic, calming, and functional. The circular sitting section as you come in was created by Danish artist Danh Vo. The overall interior was lovingly designed by hip restauranteur Frederik Bille Brahe (also of Atelier September and Apollo Bar), and has that same sense of minimalist cool, but Kafeteria comes across as less affected than those spaces. Whether you’re planning to visit the museum or not, stop in for a coffee, a cake, and a flip through an art book while you take in the gorgeous surroundings.

Kafeteria at Statens Museum for Kunst

Sølvgade 48-50 1307 København K

Opening Hours: Mon Closed Tues – Sun 11:00 am – 4:45 pm Wedn 11:0 am – 7:45 pm

    American Pie Company

American Pie Company opened in 2015 and has since been a favorite for those looking for a slice of Americana in Copenhagen. Their delicious pies – both sweet and savoury – as well as bottles of Budweiser and diner-style coffee, are a serious treat. They’ve just opened a second shop, bringing even more pie to the city.

American Pie Company

Vesterbrogade 46 1620 København V

Opening Hours: Mon – Fri 10:00 am – 6:00 pm Sat 11:00 am – 6:00 pm Sun 11:00 am – 4:00 pm

      Bars

Pompette

With a lovely, cosy space tucked away on Møllegade and a love of natural wines, Pompette has fast become a darling of the wine bar scene in Copenhagen. They have a range of glasses of wine available for only 50 DKK; the glasses aren’t huge, but they’re substantial for the price and the quality. Pompette also serves small plates of food – like a thick slice of sourdough bread and ball of burrata – if you’re feeling peckish.

Pompette

Møllegade 3 2200 København N

Opening Hours: Every day 2:00 pm – midnight

    Vin Supernatural

This isn’t exactly a bar, but we needed to include the wonderful Vin Supernatural. The space once known as ODC Mad (which is still a food delivery service) has had a little facelift and is now the spot in Copenhagen for your deli, wine, and food gift needs. If there’s a gourmet item that you need to buy, especially natural wines, Vin Supernatural is the place to go.

  Vin Supernatural

Gammel Kongevej 37 1610 København V

Opening Hours: Mon – Fri 9:00 am – 4:00 pm Sat & Sun Closed

To Try in 2019: The Best New Restaurants, Cafes, and Bars in Copenhagen published first on https://medium.com/@OCEANDREAMCHARTERS

[fai-of-the-wind-blog]

here we are

It’s been a really long time since I’ve posted anything. I just have wanted to keep my head up and not really think about how much I miss Nick, or how badly it sucks not having him home. For so many reasons. For one he makes me a hell of a lot better person, he calms me down makes my anger dissipate which is a lot because my temper lately has been so bad. I just want to love on him and kiss him, I want to snuggle in bed with my man, I want to be able to wake up to morning kisses and it be a real tangible kiss, not something we do over wowapp cause it’s the closest thing we have. I’ve been trying to think about it like my reward for him going to Korea is getting married 12/08/2017, that’s a fantastic reward. I love him so much, and miss him so much. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with him.    The other night I had a really bad dream, like it sounds great at first, but it’s really not.  It’s long.   I was at a mall talking to this blonde, blue eyes, lean, 34C breasts (looked that way anyway) she was funny. The mall was on lock down and we were sitting there talking about life. “So are you single?” I asked looking at her pink lips. Thinking god it’s been awhile since I’ve done anything..just to taste her.    “Sort of, it’s a little complicated” She looked down at her hand then back up at me. “What about you?”   “My heart is taken, but I am single.” I said leaning in a little bit closer to her.  She sighed then “Men make everything so complicated, they should be more like women just straight forward.” She said looking down at her hand again to what I could tell was nothing, then looked over at my hand which the only thing I had on was my wedding ring. Before she could say anything else I leaned in and kissed her. We sat there as the world around us went on, we sat there kissing each other, her hand resting on my thigh, my hand caressing her face as we kissed. Pulling away we just looked into each others eyes, as we sat there it had been announced the lock down was being lifted.  If only there had been more time, I might have convinced her to go home with me. Instead we got up from our little corner, and I walked to her to her car, it was raining outside.    “This is me.” She said as unlocked her car, pushing her up against the car I kissed her again, not caring who saw me. At first she tried to push me away, but as my tongue slid into her mouth she became more relaxed against me. When I was beginning to think I might have a chance, she pushed me away and said she had to go. I watched as she got into her car and left.  ———————————————————————————————————    I get a call from Eric telling him to meet me at some lake house dressed nice, when I get there I spot him and wave him over .   “Hey” He said hugging me.  “Hey” I said a little more than tired, it had been a long drive back to my place last night, my bed cold, the house empty.    “So I wondering if you wanted to go to a wedding with me today? It will be tons of fun! I promise.” He looked at me almost pleadingly.    “Today? Seriously, toooday?” I asked looking at him, as he tried to sucker me into this.   “I’m sure you need something fun, beside I’m here only good things can happen.” He smiled as I reluctantly agreed.  We walked right into the house, and saw a group of people. Immediately taking me over they began to introduce themselves.  “Im Karen.” A woman in red said.  “I’m Josh.” The older man next to her said “I’m Raven” a middle eastern woman said, her long dark hair flowing.     “Nice to meet you, I’m” was all I managed to say “This is Carolyn, my girlfriend.” Eric said looking at me.     I was so livid I wanted to punch him right then and there, for the sake of not murdering him “It’s nice to meet you…will you excuse us?” I said practically ripping his arm off.  When we were out of listening distance “WHAT IN THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!” I said beginning to punch him.     “It just..it just slipped out, oh come on just play along with it. “ He said.     “No, this is going to end badly” I said.      “You can’t just not now, I’m sure everyone knows by now. “ he said.   I just glared at him and walked away finding myself next to a group of guys drinking beers. Taking a drink off of the bar I just stood there chugging it, not even caring who’s or what the fuck it was.    “Woah there tiger. Look at her go!” A younger guy hooted out. Slamming the bottle back down, I looked at the group around me.    Smiling and wiping my face I say “I’m Carolyn, and I need another fucking drink.” One of the guys handed me a hard cider, and a screwdriver. I took both, downing the screwdriver.  “Jesus woman.” An older man said. “I like your style.” To which he downed his beer, and got another.    I stood around talking with them for about half an hour, before I started getting the dirty looks from the women. I mean I know I wasn’t acting classy, but the looks I were getting were down right hostile.  “Will you excuse me?” I said taking my drink with me. Only feeling a little buzzed at that point.  Then I saw her, the girl from yesterday. “Oh my god.” I said to myself. She’s the fucking bride! No wonder she kept looking at her finger, it was missing her engagement ring! Shit, shit shit. Nope, not a big deal. Don’t look at her, don’t do it. I told myself. Then she saw me, she visibly blushed, looking like she was about to walk over, and then some short girl wearing a silver dress got to me first.     “You  have got so much fucking nerve saying you’re dating my cousin when you’re fucking married. You’re such a whore.” She said shoving my facebook profile in my face. My profile picture was of Nick and I on our wedding day kissing, my cover photo was of him holding our beautiful newborn baby, me looking at him holding her.    “What?” is what I managed to say.     “Are you stupid too?” She asked. Instead of answering I set down my drink and walked up to the back porch where there was a mic.    “Well, I just would like to say a couple of things.” I saw Eric in the crowd coming up to the stage, and shook my head. “First off I want to say thank you for allowing me to be a part of this special moment, and for all the men who have been treating me nicely and talking to me. For the women in the family you’re a bunch of judgmental bitches. You don’t know me and instead of coming to talk to me like an adult to see what’s going on you fucking glared at me and accused me of things w/o really giving me time to explain myself. So here it is. Yes, that IS my husband in my picture, however that is MY DEAD husband, and that beautiful baby girl, that’s my dead child. Eric has known me for about three years, Nick and my child died about two years prior to that. I will always be married to my husband, I will never stop loving him, and I will never love another soul in my whole fucking life. I only said I’d come to this so Eric wouldn’t pester me about it, for fucks sake I didn’t know he’d call me his girlfriend..you can better fucking believe we aren’t friends anymore. You know what today is? Today is the anniversary of their deaths..so thank you for trying so hard to make it the most horrible day possible. Oh, and best fucking wishes to the newly weds. Enjoy the family Amanda.” With that I put the mic back in it’s place and pushed by the people who were trying to talk to me. Eric tried to stop me from walking out and for that he got slapped.  At this point I walked to the beach and sat down drink in my hand.  —————————————————————————————————     My phone started to ring, I look over and it’s about 3am.    “Erng..hello?” I answered bleary eyed.     “Hello this is Macy at Banner Del Webb is this Mrs. Aberts?” She asked.    “Yes, what’s going on, why are you calling me?” I asked instantly getting out of bed realizing Nick hasn’t come back to bed yet. The last thing he did was take little Adeline out for a drive to get her to quiet down.      “Your husband was involved in an accident and we need you to get to the hospital right away.” I didn’t even hear the rest as I dropped the phone and went into omg mode. I started crying, getting dressed, grabbed the phone which the line was now dead and drove to the hospital. I arrived at the desk. “I need to see my husband, and my daughter Adeline. I need to know what’s going on.” I almost screeched.     “Ma’am you need to calm down. Your husband was struck by a semi truck-the driver had fallen asleep. He’s in ICU, he’s conscious, but the doctors don’t think he will make it. “ She said looking at me as she walked me to his room. Seeing him there in his bed, I started to cry, reaching out to grab his hand. I looked at her then.    “What about Adeline..what about our baby?” I asked looking at Nick, who then began to cry. “No” I sobbed tears running down my cheeks.     “I’m so sorry baby. I’m so sorry.” He wiped away a tear that had rolled down my face.     “It’s not your fault, you’re going to be ok. I have you, it will be ok.” He smiled at me then, and then just like that he was gone.  I sat there crying into him, “I promise, I promise I’ll never love anyone else, and I swear that I will get justice for tearing my family apart.” I laid against him crying until they told me I had to leave. The next few weeks were a blur, as we had the funeral for them both. I cried and got angry often, my family not really knowing how to help, just letting it happen.  The man who fell asleep was charged with vehicular manslaughter, his boss, and two other people had charges against them and were found guilty. The man who had fallen asleep had taken on extra runs and it was ok’d by those other three people when it shouldn’t have. I filed a lawsuit against the company and won millions. However, for a long time my life was empty, I would go visit my family in Ohio (his parents), and see my step kids, go visit Nick at least once every other month.  ——————————————————————————————————– I woke up remembering something that never happened and yet it felt so real. Like that Nick and I had gotten married had this beautiful baby girl, light brown hair green big eyes. It feels like a real loss, it’s even been a couple of days and I just writing this out makes me sad and start to cry. Even though I know it wasn’t real. I told Nick this and he sent me kissy faces telling me he wishes he could be here to snuggle and hug me, to reassure me that he’s fine and that didn’t happen. Made me feel a lot better, he could cheer me up from 3000+ miles away. I love him so much. I really can’t wait to be Mrs.Nick Aberts.          Speaking of which wedding planning is difficult since we don’t really know for sure when he will be home.  He’s supposed to be back in November, since it’s a year long, however it’s the military so that doesn’t always mean it’s a year tour. I’ve been looking at venues by myself, getting his opinions here and there, photography, food, music all by myself. I am trying not to get stressed out. Every little girl has her dream wedding for me, I always wanted to get married in a forest, moss growing on trees, a little bit of fog going on, barefoot. I know, crazy. So I’ll settle for a outside wedding around trees and nature, I love trees. If I could have useless magical power it would be to get trees to grow from nothing. *sighs* that would be SO cool.  It’s funny cause Nick has always wanted an outside wedding as well, it’s like we really are the same person, just a male version and a female version. It feels like I’ve known him all of my life, and yet there is still so much more to learn and I yearn to learn everything about him. I can express how truly grateful and blessed that I am to have him in my life. I have no idea where I would be without him, probably miserable, lonely, and possibly a whore.  I wouldn’t have a matching cow tattoo (which makes me sad cause it cheers me up when I see it), I wouldn’t have plans to get a cherry blossom tree tattooed across my right side up my shoulder and act as he is a branch into his shoulder and arm. That’s how in love we are with each other. I can’t wait till we have our first child together, I’m hoping for a girl. Evelyn Grace Aberts…will be so beautiful, and I would be so thankful to have her. I want to have that special bond with Nick that parents get. I want to know the joys of motherhood, and see the man I love and my husband be a dad to our child. I want that. Sometime’s Nick makes me feel like a little high school girl, we are that obnoxiously sweet couple. We moo at each other, we tell each other we love you mega moo bunches, we make my parents want to vomit. It’s great. Especially that last part.    I  miss him, I try to think of it as a vacation I’m not allowed to go on, that it wasn’t a goodbye at the airport in Seattle that it was a see you later. However, that was so embarrassing. I sat there most of the night crying here and there even though he was there RIGHT there with me. I knew I wouldn’t see him and I’d try not cry as I held him close to me. I could feel people watching me as I sobbed in public as they called my boarding, I remember wanting to hug him so tightly that I couldn’t breathe, yet I still found enough air to cry uncontrollably as I walked alone to my plane. I don’t ever want to do that again. It was like waiting for duct tape to be torn off, but instead of pulling it off fast, they were tugging on it slowly. Ever so slowly. It was heart breaking. He will never leave me behind again after this tour. I don’t care if I have to pay out of pocket to fly wherever he does. It will not happen again.        I started a new job, I now work at Fry’s as a Starbucks barista, I have training this week after arrowhead, and then next week 8a-4p if Michael gives it to me off. We shall see cause I asked for it off kind of last minute, so I have no idea if I will actually be allowed to have the time off. I’m excited because hellooo I get to learn the menu and maybe the secret menu?! And it means more money for wedding/bills. So exciting, though I have to get used to working more than 24 hours a week again. Last week was brutal, Thursday and Friday I worked 11 hours and was totally wiped out. Done. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. So that will be kind of fun.   I’m all talked out for now. 01/02/2017

[chaotic-cinnamonroll95]

The Alice Killer

Chapter One

The last night of the Cinderella play had been a huge success for Elizabeth Banks, smart, well rehearsed and just only twenty-one. Her whole life was ahead of her and she was not only a lead actress on Broadway but an A-plus student at NYCU. She had countless fans and reporters constantly asked her about her success which she only accredited to her small town school where she fell in love with the art of theater. As the curtain closed on her final show of the season Elizabeth walked to the stage door along with the other actors of the play so they could take their final bow. Unbeknownst to Elizabeth, someone was watching and this person had plans that would ultimately be curtains for the young and beautiful Elizabeth Banks.

After her final bow, Elizabeth returned to her dressing room only to be greeted by her manager Ethan Kelly.

“There’s my star!”

“Hey Ethan, did you enjoy the show?”

“My dear it was beautiful and you brought the house down. As your manager, I must say this show was one of your best nights.” He wrapped his arms around Elizabeth holding her close.

“So you really, really enjoyed it?” Elizabeth asked as she was squeezed into Ethan’s embrace.

“My dear you were perfect, but now that the season is over what are your plans now?”

“Mostly focus on my school work, finals are coming up and then I’m going to be heading back home to spend some time with my family. I miss them, and I just want to see them before I audition for another play.”

“I respect that Lizzie you know I do, but what about you, you haven't gone out and done anything crazy? You are twenty-one go have fun with the cast tonight you deserve it.” Elizabeth walked over to her vanity and started to wipe away all the stage makeup and reached for her small black and white duffle that held her clothes.

“I might just go grab a cup of coffee and head back to my apartment, I do have finals to worry about so I can’t get too crazy. “ Elizabeth laughed. Ethan nodded as he excused himself from the room so Elizabeth could get ready and head home. He had done this plenty of times before but tonight he just seemed more hesitant to leave her alone. So he knocked on the door,

“Elizabeth, are you going to be alright if I leave?”

“Ethan I’m just taking a cab home after I grab some coffee, I’ll be fine!” she yelled as she wiggled into her skinny jeans.

“Okay then..well have a good night and text me when you get home.”

“You got it!” She quickly tossed on a dark blue sweater and her blue suede boots as she packed the remainder of her belongings there was a knock on the door. She paused, maybe it was just one of the stagehands making their rounds. Then came another wrap on the door and within an instant, Elizabeth’s heart began to pound in her ears. Maybe if she stayed quiet no one would bother her, but much to her wishes the knocking continued. With shaky hands, she reached for the broom handle that rested against the wall and slowly approached the door.

“Yes, who is it?” Elizabeth was cautious, nobody should be here right now, in fact, most of the cast already left to go have boos and party.

“Just a fan who enjoyed your performance this evening.” the voice replied. There was something vague but charming about the man's voice. British maybe, Elizabeth was unsure as she held on to the broom handle. She went over her options, maybe it would be best to just tell the man to leave or maybe she could open the door to see what he wants. Elizabeth pondered over her options but was rudely interrupted by his voice once more.

“Please love, I won’t bite.’ he said with a small smile in his voice, “I just want to congratulate you on a beautiful job tonight.” Elizabeth knew it would be rude to send him away now so with a deep breath she opened the door her blonde curls falling to the side.

“I didn’t mean to frighten you, I just wanted to give you these roses.” He was 6’2 with blue eyes and dark brown hair that was perfectly styled. He wore a well-tailored suit with a tie that corresponded with his eyes and his smile was enough to take a women’s breath away.

“These are exquisite sir, thank you. But I’m sorry to say that only cast and crew can be back here. Sorry for being a killjoy but it’s just company policy, you know lawsuits and all that.” Elizabeth said with a flourish and a smile that only made the man chuckle.

“Well I wouldn't want to get you in any trouble, my dear, I just wanted to ask you what your plans were for the rest of the evening?”

“That is none of your concern sir.” She said looking up at him. His height made her feel like at any second he could overpower her but she just had to play it cool.

“Enough of the sir nonsense, call me David, David Winters.”

“David, I really should go, I have a busy schedule.”

“Let me walk you out then, wouldn't want a beautiful young lady like yourself out on the street all alone.” He was persistent and Elizabeth was beginning to feel worried but maybe that was just the butterflies in her stomach.

“Well, I guess a chaperone could be useful.”

“Excellent!” Elizabeth placed the roses on her makeup table and grabbed her bag.

“Where are you headed?” David asked as he leaned against the stage door.

“I have finals tomorrow so just going to grab some coffee and head home.” She said as she locked the door and walked over to David.

“This was the last show of the season, why not go out and celebrate?”

“Finals are more important than a party in my humble opinion.” David threw his head back in laughter.

“So I have fallen for the beautiful geek..the guys at Cheshire’s Den won’t believe me.”

“The Cheshire’s Den?”

“It’s a hookah bar and pub, mostly hipsters and party goers attend, but don’t worry I’m not going to take you there let's just get some coffee down the road.” David started to walk ahead of her letting Elizabeth process the information. “You can’t always be such a goody-goody, you need to let loose and have some fun!” she told herself. This was one of the craziest things she had ever done but she just wanted to feel the thrill of being the bad girl for once.

“David, I change my mind, I want to go to the Cheshire’s Den.”

“Really love, alright! Then follow me, my lady.” He offered her his arm and she took it without a second thought. They walked out onto the streets of New York City, the winter air crisp and fresh.

“My car is just down the block.” When they made it to his car Elizabeth couldn’t help but stare, a black two-door Jaguar, a real classic.

“Wow..this is gorgeous.” David chuckled wrapping his arm around Elizabeth's waist.

“It was my father's car but he gave it to me as a graduation gift a few years back. Now  I’m guessing by that expression you know a beautiful car when you see it?”

“I love old cars! My father worked as a mechanic, His main priority was restoring vintage vehicles. Most of my childhood was spent in the garage working with him and it was never a dull moment. He taught me everything I know.” she said with an innocent grin which in turn he returned with a small chuckle and an arm around her shoulder.

“Then my dear, your carriage awaits.” She climbed into his car and they sped off. The whole ride there was filled with laughter and sweet words when they finally reached their destination the only thing on Elizabeth’s mind was how far was she willing to go. This stranger had come into her life with a bouquet of roses and a charming disposition and yet here she was ready to break all of her rules and just be free.

“Here we are.” He said as they pulled up to the streets curb. David parked the car and got out shutting the door behind him leaving Elizabeth inside. She was excited by the idea of breaking free and once he opened her door she was ready to dive headfirst into a world she never knew. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder giving her a reassuring squeeze as they walked to the door. A woman in a pink striped mini skirt, purple bra, and matching cat ears greeted them.

“Welcome to the Cheshire��s Den my lovelies!” Elizabeth could only stare at the women as her heaving breast bounced as she greeted them.

“Thanks for the warm welcome Amanda. Hey by any chance is Johnny here? I wanted him to make this beauty here his signature Unbirthday.”

“Why of course, just follow the teardrops to the bar! Oh, and what do you think of the costume, pretty cute right?!” Elizabeth started to feel a wave of jealousy as this scantly glad girl flirted with her date..wait, why was she even jealous he asked her out so why was she feeling so mad all of a sudden.

“Isn’t it a little cold for you to be dressed like that?” Elizabeth finally asked. The woman named Amanda could only laugh.

“Sweetie it’s my uniform, but yes I’m freezing my tits off out here but at least Johnny keeps the heat lamps on while I am outside so I don’t turn into a popsicle.” Her green eyes twinkled as she brushed a manicured nail through her platinum waves.

“Isn’t she precious?” David laughed as they all walked inside. Amanda left shortly after to greet the other customers as he and Elizabeth followed the tears to the bar. The music was pounding and all the excitement was starting to make Elizabeth feel faint.

“Hey, is there anywhere quiet I could sit and wait for you?”

“Yea, some tables in the back why, are  you feeling okay?”

“Kinda, I’ve never been anywhere like this and it’s just starting to get overwhelming that’s all.”

“Do you want to leave?” He looked at her with an agitated face which only made Elizabeth feel like she was going to regret leaving.

“No, I just want to rest, that’s all.” She said with a sincere smile.

“Good, I was worried I was going to lose you.” he leads her to the back of the bar and sat down.

“You just wait here, I’ll be right back.” he left amongst the crowd leaving Elizabeth alone at the table. The smoke and music were like a hypnotic trip and in the back of her mind, Elizabeth felt her conscious screaming run. When he returned to the table he had two glasses filled with a pink, green and blue liquid.

“What is this?”

“This my dear is the famous Unbirthday, give it a try!” and try she did. It tasted like the sweetest candy and before she knew it she had drunk the entire glass.

Time passed and soon the effects of the unbirthday were beginning to hit Elizabeth hard.

“I don’t feel so good..” she slurred as her body collapsed to the floor. Her vision had grown hazy and she couldn't find David anywhere.

Elizabeth’s body was carried out the back door into the brisk winter air her body was conscious of the movement as she was placed into the back of a car in a box.

“Silly girl, honestly you really shouldn’t leave with strangers. But don’t worry you’re safe with me. You’re going to be my next star, my dear Alice.”