#they really ruined me for the rest of my life

[whistlewritesforfun]

I had been (sorta) (kinda) (maybeeeeee) running a cult out of my ranch for years now. It was going pretty well I’d say! It was small but that made it inconspicuous. It was generating plenty of money for me and nobody cared enough about the run down ranch a few miles outside of town that the stranger individuals would visit frequently.

We had just finished up the usual “sacrifice” of a rat, a stringy thing I decided to put out of its misery after seeing it in a pathetic little tank in the store, when a blinding light emerged from its carcass. It was this odd grayish green color. Reminiscent of a rather painful turd or some especially stinky vomit.

Of course every religion needs a figurehead. I’d found some random God in an old history textbook from my mythology class. I’d just so happened to choose one that had a rodent schtick.

You could imagine my surprise when the little rat I’d just speared through exploded with that ugly green light, then warped and twisted. Convulsing about as it changed shape into what could best be described as a star made out of flesh, bone, and rat fur. It was hands down, the GROSSEST thing I’d ever seen.

And THEN the thing had the audacity to start speaking. Every utterance from its tongue caused another convulsion in the warped rat, a faint glow of that green emitting from the eyes. Which were much too far apart by this point. It really was horrible to look it, there were little bones sticking out and puncturing the flesh everywhere. Eugh. I should’ve picked a less gross god, maybe then I would’ve be in this horrendous predicament.

The warped rat body spoke to the congregation for about 30 minutes. For 25 of that I wasn’t paying attention because I didn’t want to barf all over my supposed deity. (There were little droplets of that disgusting rat blood on my ceremonial carpet. That particularly irked me.) For the last 5, I do not think I shall soon forget it.

“This my dear congregation!” (The rat… thingy… hovered a little bit closer to me.) “is a true servant! A true leader! And a true follower. He has blessed you with the gift of my existence. He has shepherded you along the way and through adversity to create my return! This man! He is now my high priest, henceforth until his death!”

“I’m what?” I couldn’t stop the blunt words from falling out of my mouth.

“You’re my high priest!”

“… riiiiiiiiiiiiight.”

“Do you… have doubts?” The rat-jumble asked, its scratchy voice reminded me of someone who was talking right after waking up, but very deep and highly unsettling.

“Am I really quite… priestly enough?” I asked, cringing slightly. It was evident I had made a very very grave mistake by this point.

“You’ve been preaching g for months. You brought me back from my slumber. I was sure I’d never be worshipped again. You are most certainly my high priest.” He… it… the rat thingy assured. I just nodded. I had entirely screwed myself. I was gonna be stuck with this cult the rest of my life…

“To go with your title high-priest, I will bestow on you a gift of my choosing.” Oh goody. Please don’t be dead rats. Please don’t be dead rats.

The rat sphere drifted nearer, the dripping of blood still grating on my nerves. Keeping the abject terror off my face was difficult beyond imagination. The orb then rotated so wherever the tail went in the warped carcass could tap me gently. As it did, I felt the most exhilarating burst of what I can only describe as rat magic.

“You shall be able to heal even the most sick and miserable. With your words, your touch, your compassion. The spread of sound and healthfulness shant be stopped but by your own limitation.”

I wasn’t sure what was appropriate at that moment so I kneeled. A particularly bad idea, as it now bug me in the rat-blood splash zone. I mean SERIOUSLY! This is the grossest vessel that he could’ve possibly picked! My carpet is entirely ruined!

With that final statement however, the pen fell to the ground with the most hideous mush noise, a few crackles, and what can best be written as a “Skrrrrrrsht.”

Now what on earth was I to do with this information… or ability. I certainly couldn’t heal my mind from what I’d just witnessed transpire. Believe me, I was trying. The divine are disgusting. So I wordlessly lead my congregation out of the doors of my makeshift chapel, and to the Waffle House half a mile away.

As is usual for Saturdays, we all ate at the Waffle House in our congregation robes. Today though. The viscous syrup warming my throat brought to mind the mental imagery of the rat blood. I shoved it aside and decided maybe to forgo the waffles… just for today.

You started a scam religion for a quick buck. You begin to panic when your fake god was actually a real forgotten one awakened from new worshippers, declared you it's high priest, and granted you the power of healing.

[hxlxnaaa]

𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐧

★ synopsis: over one summer, a whirlwind romance creates an obvious choice: to stay in the life she's always known or follow sylus into the unknown, chasing love and freedom.

★ character: sylus

★ cw: first-person POV, sort of present day au? pretty fluffy, some implications but nothing obvious, soft sylus, may have spelling errors (i wrote this at 2 am)

★ word count: 1.3k

★ a/n: this is super short and not really meant as an intense read. just some poetic fluff about sylus (lord knows we need more sweet reads of him *sob*)

I remember the first time I saw him.

He was so… different from everyone around. The way he acted, the way he held himself, the devious smirk that always graced his devilishly handsome face. He had this aura that was off, but in this perfectly, sickeningly good way. He was something this dull town never had.

He came in once to my bakery, smiling and talking to me as if he had known me forever.

“What’s your name, sweetie?” That was different, no one spoke to each other like that around here. Anyone in their right mind would be creeped out, yet I enjoyed every second; every word that came out of his mouth spoke with his deep, velvet voice. I loved the difference, I loved the attention he gave me. Constant indulging in the feeling his presence brought on.

Introducing himself as Sylus, I said his name thousands of times in my head.

The look he gave me when he learned my name was engraved in my mind for centuries. His hard eyes softened, repeating every syllable as if it was candy on his tongue. Of my name.

Sylus, Sylus, Sylus.

After that, he would visit at least once a day, if not a few times. He’d lean over my counter, propping himself up on one of his arms. He always rolled his sleeves up, and buttoned his shirt to his lower chest, showing enough of his perfect skin that I always resisted to touch.

“Red is your color.” I had told him this after he wore this delicious, wine red top. It complimented everything on him, like a rose in the snow.

“Everything is your color.” He leaned towards me, holding his face in his hand.

“Why do you say that?” I started serving a customer, and I could feel his eyes on me.

“Well,” He started, “Your personality is very warm, like yellow, orange, and red.”

I glanced at him, “Have a good evening!” I bid the lady I served goodbye.

“And your looks are very cool, blues and purples fit you best.”

Turning away from him, adjusting things on my shelves, I asked, “What about green?”

“What about green?” He repeated.

“You didn’t mention green. Does green fit me?”

He smirked, “I told you every color fits you. So green would too. I’m sorry I didn’t mention every shade in the rainbow.”

I turned back to him, and he had his head resting in his arms, staring at me with his usual smug look. Walking up to him, I ran a hand through his hair, “Y’know, green actually takes up most of the color spectrum. It has a countless number of shades.”

“Really?”

“Mm,” I gave him one of his favorite pastries I made, “it's evolutionary. Humans are omnivores, so our eyes help us differentiate between shades of green to help us find plants to eat and avoid, but it can help us find prey animals that are seeking specific kinds of plants.”

“You’re truly fascinating, sweetie. You and all your shades of green.”

“As are you, Sylus.”

As are you.

Sylus was on a trip here for the summer. When I asked him why?

"To find someone like you."

I thought of him as borrowing my heart, when I knew he wouldn’t return it when he left at the end of the summer. When the leaves turned yellow, red and orange, just as he described my personality, he’d take my heart with him back to his home.

I felt something with him, a spark, a waterfall of passion. Something I had never felt in this city before.

There were the ruins, a place where all the young civilians would go to party into the early mornings. Sylus convinced me to go with him once.

“I want the experience of being here.” He had stated matter of factly, yet I knew the tall man was just finding an excuse to be with me a while longer.

I rolled my eyes, “That’s not much of an experience, being around a bunch of sweaty drunks.”

Oh but it was. To travel back to that night, where we had danced together, our cheeks flushed with red wine, or bodies pressed into one.

He took me back to the bakery, and kissed me against the old brick walls. Him in his red shirt, buttoned down and sleeves up, his hair a mess, but still shining in the illumination of the moon and street lights.

From there, something shifted.

I’d show him all my secret spots, just to fall into a field together, tangled in each other's limbs. He’d kiss me like I was his world, and nothing else existed; and with him, nothing else did exist.

I tried to teach him how to bake, how to knead dough, how to remember measurements without a recipe. Sylus would get flour in his hair, on his cheeks, his nose, his shirt and his pants (all on purpose, courtesy of me).

"We have to match.” He’d say, before taking his flour covered hands and taking my face in them, rubbing his dusty nose on mine, rubbing our cheeks together. I giggled and smacked his chest with a towel, before wiping his and my face off.

There was the night where I wore a new dress; an emerald green sundress that matched the grassy hills of the city in the night. He took one look at me, his red eyes burning with love and desire, and as I took a step forward his hands were all over. Dinner was scrapped, and I spent the night under him tangled in the sheets, one with love.

After, cuddled together, a sweaty beautiful mess, he adjusted his bare chest against mine. Placing his hand on my hip, drawing shapes with his finger, he whispered to me as I was about to fall asleep,

“So many shades of green, and I was lucky enough to find you.”

“I love you, Sylus.” I mumbled through reality and my dreams.

He smiled against my lips, “I love you too.”

As they say, time flies when you’re having fun. Eventually, the end of summer came around.

I would have to say goodbye. Say goodbye to Sylus, say goodbye to everything.

No more grand entrances into my work, messing with the collar of his red billowy shirt. No more watching his bare back as he’d stretch in the morning, smirking back at me as he’d trace his fingers over marks on his neck and chest. Life would go back to routine, everything in this town staying quiet and still as it once was. Before I knew him.

The day before he had to leave, he swung open the door to my bakery, a wild look in his eyes.

“Come with me.” He said, stern. The look on his face told me I wasn’t getting much of a choice. I wasn’t sure I wanted one.

I raised a brow, “What?”

He walked behind the counter, one hand grabbing my waist, the other going through my hair.

“Come back with me. Stay with me. You can open a bakery there, I’ll help. Everything will be the same. You said it yourself, you wanted out of here, come with me.” His usual put together look was coming undone, his lips pulled tightly together as a silent plea.

He could make it happen, the man had more money than I could ever imagine. Going with him could make all my dreams come true; getting out of this monotonous town, living comfortably, being…happy.

I shook my head, almost trying to convince myself not to listen, “Sylus, you’re not thinking about this.” Hypocritical, I’m not sure I was either.

His brows furrowed, “I have. That's all I’ve done. Now, sweetie, say yes.”

I thought about all the shades of green.

…

“Yes.”

(divider by cafekitsune)

[staylovesmiley]

Youtiful: Another Collision Story - Chapter 2

₊˚⊹ᰔ Pairing; Stray Kids x afab!reader

₊˚⊹ᰔ ₊˚⊹ᰔ Summary; It’s been a wonderful tour so far, spending time visiting different countries with the loves of your life. But will a sudden change ruin everything? A continuation to Collision

₊˚⊹ᰔ ₊˚⊹ᰔ ₊˚⊹ᰔ Warnings; implied afab reader (only they/them pronouns used for reader), angst, some sexual themes at points, fluff, this is still mainly a slice of life story though there will be some drama in this sequel, unplanned pregnancy, more tags to come most likely as the story progresses

The airport was loud, causing you to have a splitting headache as you tried to rest leaning against Changbin’s strong body in the seat beside you while waiting for your flight to be called. “Feeling any better, baby?” Hyunjin whispered as he took a seat on the other side of you. “Um- not really? My head just really hurts…” The dancer nodded a bit as he thought, pulling out some snacks from his bag to offer you. “Maybe your blood sugar is low? Why don’t you try to eat something.”

The smell coming from the bag held out to you made your stomach wretch and you were out of your seat in seconds, hanging over the edge of the nearest trashcan as you emptied what little breakfast you had been able to hold down into the bin. Both men gave each other worried glances before Hyunjin called out softly to their leader. “Channie hyung- help?” The oldest turned around from where he was discussing something with their manager to see you slowly lifting your head from the trashcan and lock eyes with him. “Star? Oh gosh, honey-“ he was at your side in a second, rubbing your back as someone placed a handful of paper towels in his hand to help clean your face. “Are you sure you’re up for getting on the plane, baby? You know one of us can stay back with you for a day or two until you feel up to flying.”

You were shaking your head before he could finish his sentence, giving him a weak smile. “I’m fine Chris, promise.” With a deep breath you stood up a bit and made your way over to the women’s room. “I’m sure it’s just the change of the seasons getting to me…just gonna go wash my mouth out real quick-“ Chan watched as the door closed behind you, lips pursed together as he walked over to where Hyunjin and Changbin still sat with confusion laced in their shared expressions. “What happened?” His voice was soft yet serious, taking up the seat you had previously been occupying.

Hyunjin shrugged, holding up the snacks he had offered to you. “Their head was hurting so I offered them some incase they just needed to eat- ya know Lix and Minnie said they didn’t eat much for breakfast before leaving either.” As Chan himself caught a whiff of whatever was in the bag held up in his boyfriend’s hands he gagged a bit. “Okay those reek, Jinnie- no wonder Star hurled.” He teased, laughing at the younger’s pout as he put his snacks back in his bag. “You’re such a meanie! Those are absolutely delicious, thank you very much.”

While his boyfriends continued to tease one another, Changbin kept his eyes glued to the bathroom door as his mind began to wander. No, you couldn’t be. He shook his head lightly to clear it of such thoughts. Surely you would tell them if something so serious was happening. He made a mental note to check in on you after you had landed and got checked into the hotel. “Han!” He called out, getting up to make his way over to where Felix had himself practically wrapped around him. “Yeah, Binnie?” Big boba eyes looked up at his fellow rapper, blinking a few times as he waited for the older to tell him what he needed. “Switch places with me and let Star stay with me for the first stop?”

Jisung pouted, arms coming to cross over his chest as best they could with the freckled dancer still draped around him. “And why should I? We agreed age order from youngest to oldest and it’s my turn!” Changbin rolled his eyes playfully and gave a light slap to the younger’s arm. “I’m just worried about them. They aren’t feeling well and I wanted to be able to keep an eye on them and take care of them.” He confessed, looking down at his shoes bashfully causing both of his boyfriends to coo at his shyness. “Awe Binnie that’s so sweet!” Felix chirped, rubbing Han’s shoulders rapidly with the cuteness aggression he was feeling.

The younger rapper’s smile fell quickly the more he thought, pout back on his lips as he looked up at Changbin. “But wait a minute why can’t I take care of them? What difference would it make-“ Felix gave him a light slap this time, pouting back at him. “You know how Bin is- come on just swap with him!” At the persistence of both men, Jisung relented. “Okay fine…Star can stay with you this stop- but no take backs! I get the turn after Jinnie! Felix as my witness!”

Changbin relaxed a bit knowing your spot in his room that night had been secured. “Deal! Thanks Hannie~” The older wished he could lean down and give his boyfriend a kiss as thanks but knew that was not doable in such a public space, so he settled for blowing him one instead before practically skipping back over to his seat with Hyunjin and Chan. By now you had returned from the restroom and sitting in the seat he once occupied. “Hi baby! I just talked to Han and he agreed to switch places with me so you’ll be with me at this first stop.”

You raised an eyebrow at him in question, looking behind him at where Felix and Han both gave you a smile and a wave. “Oh-Kay? Any reason?” You gave your boyfriend a smile to let him know you weren’t upset by the change, only curious as to why. “Just missed you lately and wanted some time with you sooner is all! Is that a crime?” He teased, about to sit beside Hyunjin in the empty spot on his other side when the sound of your flight being called echoed through the loud speakers. “I’m still sitting with Innie on the flight, though. I promised him I’d help him choose what photos to post next to Instagram.”

The rapper nodded his head, helping you up as your head spun slightly and your nausea felt like it could be returning. “Fine by me, as long as I get you to myself for the week!” With a wink, Changbin headed off after the others to board the plane. You fell in line as well, Jeongin coming up beside you to link arms with a dimpled smile. “Excited to be back in the states?” He asked, head tilting to the side cutely as he looked at you expectantly. “Yeah kinda! We are going mostly to places I’ve never been….I mean- America is so big and we are only making a few stops in comparison but it will be nice to see new places.” You attempted to explain, watching as he nodded in understanding. “I’m glad you can come with us and experience everything.” The younger’s voice was soft, fingers intertwining with yours the second you were sat in your seats. “Me too, Innie.” You leaned over to place a kiss over his dimpled cheek causing them to deepen even more as his smile grew wider.

While on the flight you tried to focus on whatever conversations you were pulled into with your youngest boyfriend. However, your mind continued to wonder to the small version of one of them currently growing inside you and what you were going to do regarding the issue. Every time you thought about how difficult life would become with a child added into the mix, both for you and the boys, you felt the right decision was to terminate the pregnancy. But the thought of termination caused tears to well in your eyes and an unease to settle deep in your bones.

You never really thought about having children, but now that it was possibly happening you couldn’t help but imagine it. Even though you felt that for the sake of your boyfriends’ and their careers you shouldn’t keep it, you weren’t sure that’s what you really wanted. As you drifted off to sleep sometime during the flight you found yourself caught in a dream where you had decided to keep the baby, raising it along side the kids happily.

The scenes played in your mind rapidly.

Your sweet Changbin cradling the tiny infant close to his muscular chest, his physique making the tiny human look even smaller as he would look at them with so much love and adoration.

Jisung rocking the baby to sleep or soothing them when they got fussy by singing in such a gentle voice it pulled at the strings of your heart and made you fall for him just that much more.

Seungmin who would obsess over making sure everything was perfectly safe, especially once the little one started to crawl and walk, going baby proofing crazy and storming around the dorm like a man gone mad with a tool belt around his waist and a power drill in his hand.

Hyunjin, ever the artist, painting your bump each month for pictures as your little baby grew inside of you. When they were finally born he would inside on taking foot prints each month as well for a project he was keeping to himself, a surprise for you all.

Your precious Innie who would make sure that any time he went out with the baby they were dressed in matching outfits. He would take a million and one pictures of the two of them, so proud to be a father with the most best dressed baby on the planet. No, universe.

Felix who when he first saw the little bundle laid on your chest in the hospital, tears welling in his eyes before finally spilling over once the baby was placed in his arms. Ever since then he would cry any time the infant would, somehow instantly quieting the child as they would stare at him with wide eyes as if shocked by the action.

Minho who would cook almost endlessly in a quest to find something the now growing toddler would eat, refusing to purchase the overpriced and over processed baby food from the store. He insisted no child of his would ever eat bland mush as long as he was around.

And your lovely Chan, working in the studio as usually but now with a babbling toddler sat in his lap, pudgy little fingers attempting to smash at the keyboard he was currently working on but instead of getting upset he would calmly take the little hands in his own and beam down at them with such a soft expression, speaking in the same baby voice he would with his beloved pet Berry, talking about how his baby wanted to be just like him and be a producer someday.

When you woke, jostled slightly by your youngest boyfriend who sat beside you, you looked around frantically as if you were missing something. When it dawned on you that you had only been dreaming, and there was no child for you to hold and care for, your eyes began to glass over with tears and you let out a few warning sniffles before the dam burst and you were openly sobbing in your seat. The sound of your cries alerted your boyfriends who were in the process of gathering their things to leave the plane now that it had landed.

“Star, baby? What’s wrong-“ Jisung, who had been sitting in the isle across from you, crouched down beside you to wipe away your tears gently. The sweet gesture only served to make you cry even more, body trembling as you reached out and clung to him as Jeongin struggled to help undo your seatbelt for you.

The boys all stood watching with concern, no one else stepping forward for fear that they may crowd you and make it worse. Once Jeongin got the seatbelt undone you fully flung yourself into Jisung’s arms, knocking him back onto the isle floor with the force as he held you protectively. “Hey, baby. I’m here, I’ve got you.” You slowly began to calm down, face buried in the crook of his neck, taking deep breaths to match his own as you felt his chest move with your own.

When you were finally calm enough you pulled back, wiping away your tears as you stood. “Star? What was all that about….” Jeongin spoke softly, coming up behind you with both of your carryons slung over his shoulders. “I just- um- bad dream…” You looked down, feeling bad for lying to them. It wasn’t a bad dream, not at all. It was such a lovely and idealistic dream that caused your heart to feel like had been ripped out of your chest when you awoke to see it wasn’t real. But it could be…it was already partially real and the fact that you enjoyed the dream so much just confused you more as to what decision would be the right one. You needed to tell them, soon. But for now you focused on getting out of the plane and into the cars that would take you to the hotel you’d be staying in for the week.

Once you were finally settled in the hotel with Changbin, the your boyfriend insisted you lay down for a nap and that he would wake you before they ordered dinner. You weren’t going to argue, your head hurting and the nausea having kept you up most nights leading up to the trip. You weren’t sure if it was from the tiny human growing inside you or the stress of trying to figure out what to do about said tiny human.

You curled up on the soft hotel mattress and your loving boyfriend tucked you in with a soft kiss to your temple, letting you know he was going to be in Chan’s room to work on some new music they had some ideas for. He wasn’t lying entirely, he was going to Chan’s room. They all were.

He made his way across the hall and gave a few sharp knocks before the door was opening and Jeongin was pulling him inside rather harshly. “Woah- no need to manhandle me Ayen-ah!” He laughed, watching as the youngest closed the door and made his way back over to where Felix was curled up on the couch to cuddle up to him. “Something is wrong with Star, like….really wrong.” Han speaks up first, hands rubbing nervously over his bouncing knees before Minho reaches over to still them. “Well clearly- but they don’t seem to want to talk about it…” Hyunjin says, his eyebrows furrowed as he seemed to be lost in his confusion. “I think I know what’s wrong.” Changbin spoke up, voice quiet which was a rare occurrence. All eyes fell on him expectantly, Chan stepping up to him with arms crossed over his chest and a look of worry obviously painted across his face. “Bin?”

Taking a deep breath, the rapper ran a hand through his hair nervously before answering. “I think Star could be pregnant.”

Blank stares met his eyes as he looked over all of his boyfriends. Within seconds the room erupted into chaos. Hyunjin looked like he had seen a ghost, Seungmin’s expression not much better. Chan held an unreadable expression though there were hints of worry and disbelief hidden there. Felix was teary eyed as he looked around. “P-Pregnant? Like with our baby?” This caused Minho to scoff, the second oldest holding a slightly amused expression. “Ya! Who else’s baby would it be?” He looked around at the group with a pointed finger. “Alright fess up, who’s been hitting it raw?” Minho tried to lighten the mood. Even though he was joking a few hands suddenly raised slowly. Han, Jeongin, and not surprisingly Chan all held their hands up bashfully. “Seriously??” Seungmin stared with wide, disbelieving eyes. “They were on birth control! We didn’t think we would end up like this-“ Han shouted in defense, a pout evident on his face.

Minho rubbed his back gently, giving a kiss to his head. “Hey, we aren’t accusing you of murder or anything I was only teasing. Didn’t expect any of you to fess up.”

The room fell silent, all of them staring off into space before Hyunjin finally spoke up in an almost dreamy voice. “We’re….we could be dads.” That’s what caused the tears to finally fall from Felix as he held on to Jeongin, crying onto his shoulder as the youngest gently ran his fingers through his hair even though there were tears in his own eyes making his vision slightly blurred.

“Guys I could be wrong- let’s not get to ahead of ourselves! I just- I remember this is kinda how my sister was when she was pregnant with my nephew…it’s why I wanted them to stay with me this week so I could maybe keep an eye on them and make sure they are okay if that is the case…maybe get them to feel comfortable enough to tell me.”

Chan frowned, sweaty palms running over his thighs nervously. “But why wouldn’t they tell us already? What if they aren’t pregnant and it’s something really bad- I’m gonna go talk to them-“ Changbin stopped him, bringing the oldest in for a tight hug as he rubbed his back soothingly. “Hyung please- she’s resting now. I’m almost positive that’s what’s going on…trust me? She may just be overwhelmed and trying to find the right time. We haven’t exactly all been available as of late.”

All eyes were cast downwards as they realized he was speaking nothing but the truth. With the comeback and then the world tour right after they had been so busy that any time spent with their beloved partner was fleeting and brief or not all of them were present. If what Changbin was suggesting was true then it would be something you would want to tell them all together, and so it made sense you would be waiting for the right time.

Slowly everyone began to calm down, minds running wild with the news that they would be fathers this very moment at the possibility there was a baby growing inside of you. They didn’t know for sure yet and so they all silently agreed to wait for you to say something about it first for fear of getting it wrong. For all they knew you were coming down with the flu and if they mentioned to you that you could be pregnant it could only upset you further, as your emotional state as of late could be from anything from stress at work to missing your boyfriends as they got busier with their own work.

That night Changbin tells them to eat without the two of you, instead the rapper ordered you both room service and woke you gently by slipping into bed behind you and pulling you against his strong chest. “Hmph-Binnie?” You mumbled, sleep still muddling your mind. “It’s me, baby. Since you seemed so tired I decided the two of us could just eat in here tonight? Is that okay?” You smiled softly, nodding as you rolled over in his arms to face him. “I’m not gonna complain about getting some one on one time with you, Binnie~” Changbin beamed at you, his dimple showing causing you to reach up and poke it. He giggled, pulling you closer as he peppered your face in soft kisses.

These were the moments you lived for, feeling safe and loved. You thought back to your current predicament, eyes closing as you remembered the dream from the plane. Maybe…this would be okay? Maybe it wouldn’t complicate things as much as you were worrying about? Still, doubt crept into your mind as you took a shaky breath. “Everything okay, baby? Is my starlight still feeling icky?” You nodded and slowly sat up as to not trigger your nausea. “Not too bad right now, my head just hurts a bit? I’ll be okay though.” Changbin hummed softly, admiring you from where he still laid back against the soft pillows. He had to fight the urge to reach out and run a hand over your stomach, his thoughts still running wild with the images of you pregnant with his baby. Their baby.

The food arrived shortly after and even though you had to struggle to keep it down, you managed alright and afterwards Changbin drew a warm bath for the both of you. Once you were settled with your back resting against his chest and the bubbles he had added lightly tickling your bare skin you began to feel better. “A bubble bath?” You giggled, finally acknowledging it as you looked at him from over your shoulder. Your boyfriend laughed as well, scooping up a handful before bringing it to his chin to make a fake beard. “Yup, just so I could do this! Do you think I’d look good with facial hair?” You snorted, scooping up some of your own to create your own beard. “I dunno…would I?” This caused the both of you to erupt in infectious laughter, the rest of the bath spent more peacefully until the water became too cold and you both ended up wrapped in each others arms in bed, bare limbs tangled as Changbin kissed you softly in between whispers of how much he adored you. You told him the same, of course, listing off everything about him that you found endearing.

That is how you drifted off to sleep, feeling oh so loved and oh so safe, hope wrapping around you as you dreamed yet again of what the future could be if you were to start a family with the absolute loves of your life.

author’s note: I know I left you guys hanging with this story for long enough- I’m so sorry it took this long to get chapter 2 out but you guys should all give a big thanks to @chancloud8 for helping me get out of the slump I was having regarding the dream part of the fic- I wasn’t exactly sure what direction I wanted to go and the inner conflict Star is having was just- idk I really hope I got it across how I wanted- I’m not gonna make you all wait much longer for ch3 so please be a little patient as I at the very least update Connected and Going Dumb before another Youtiful update. I hope you all enjoy~

taglist; (pink users I wasn’t able to tag) @softkisshyunjin @coastinglove @palindrome969 @amara-mars @whiteghostt @ihrtlix @queen-in-the-shadows @soaplickerrr @skzswife @reallysparklychaos @sebastianswhore13 @velvetmoonlght @katsukis1wife @chancloud8 @corgilover20

[starlet-orchids]

ok ok eden garden chapter 1 rant and afterthoughts (spoilers for all of the chapter here)

WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN GOD

I def want to write my afterthoughts on this cause it has seriously ruined my whole mind rn

First I did the daily life on one day and the trial on the next so in the middle of the night, I had a whole dream that Diana was the killer and so when the trial said it was Diana I was like: OH WAS MY DREAM RIGHR??? (Ofc it wasnt)

GOD RHE DIANA AND DAMON PARALLELS ARE PARALLEING TOO BTW. I can not describe better than others have but god I cant

I really will miss the damon wolfgang dynamic, I did one of his fte and I found it so admirable how he def did want to help everyone and even if he had a mild dislike for Damon and Eva, he was willing to cooperate ig?? And also how Damon mentioned he challenged him to do better, god I love me some challenge rivals I will miss them

Damon and Kai were also super funny. I didnt like Kai too much in the prologue but I started warming up to him in chapter 1, he is very goofy and just a guy. I cant hate him too much for that

My other fav damon dynamics going on were with Cassidy and Toshiko each. Cassidy and Damon are a powerduo, they bicker but they get stuff done quick. Toshiko and Damon also are so sibs, I died when I first saw the mochi nickname btw. I hope to see them be siblings more, I am grateful for their content.

Now the elephant in the room of Damon and Eva. Ok uhm. Eva had so so much characterization here its crazy. Eva slowly revealing her true self to others after getting exposed, showing how her ult liar front was just a facade in order to not be seen as lower. She def has a bad complex cause of her past (watch her ftes), she hates being seen as low and nothing human so because of that, has become blind to people who do care. She was willing to sacrifice everyone cause she thought no one trusted her at all in any way. I think she targeted Wolfgang cause of how he was the main one who was singling her out from the rest. She was bitter towards him and everyone who followed him the entire time compared to Damon. Damon acknowledged it but subconsiosly allowed himself to build trust with the rest. Why else would he start defending Diana after being the one to start accusing her? He recognized the kindness she had given to him that had no tone of pity. Meanwhile Eva couldnt see the help with no strings attached from Diana and so decided to frame her otherwise.

Eva and Damon friendship is so sweet, they both were excluded and dislike being seen lower/less than their peers. The way Damon cried after her execution even after she admitted to not believing the care and trust she had recieved from them all. The irony on how Eva pointed out the most likely to kill were the ultimates and yet she starts the game.

Hm other stuff I would like to say last now are that the cgs are cute, the grace wolfgang stuff is so crazy and I cant not wait for the next chapters if chapter 1 was willing to pull smth like this alrdy!! The pacing of the daily life and the trial were quite reasonable and the banter was so silly to read, I enjoyed it a ton for sure

Also I could write a whole Eva analysis but I suck at wording stuff, please tell me if I should write one tbh.

ok thats all of it, have a guess at who my favs are after reading all of this. Thank you for reading if you did!!!

[artmolonara]

Reset - Short Fic/Free Write

It was in darkness that I found them, tied to a chair so tight their hands were purple, a sting gone wrong.

They were not going to like what they became coherent to, but some small part would thank me, I know.

So as the last insect was squashed, stains seeping into wallpaper and plaster, I turned my care to my Detective, with a far more gentler hand.

First, unbinding, catching them in their slump, propping them up with my form, which was still drenched from the spray back of crimson liquid.

I softly rubbed blood back through their wrists, encouraging a return to their normal color.

Their hands... I can't help a moment to actually feel them, the rough callouses each digit holds, the small scars and imperfections of a life of hunting, like mine. The only thing that ruins it is the cold metal ring that chokes their perfect finger, like the zip ties just had done mere moments ago.

I wonder if there is something I can do about that...

But before I can entertain that notion, they stir, and I have a new objective.

"Come on, let's get you out of here."

I do not take them far; another room, away from my artwork. I know red isn't their color.

A kitchen is the nearest room that is clean, untouched, sparse, but there is at least ice to chill bruises. And the bump on their head looked like a nasty one.

... really bad actually, not that I'm looking at it.

A worry sets in, I inspect more closely, trying to remember the symptoms of a concussion.

"Detective? Hey, Detective? Are you with me?" I try to pry open an eyelid to see the pupil size, make sure they were even.

I'm shrugged off, they are rousing to attention, looking around bleary. I study, looking for signs of something off.

"What... happened?" They ask, a dull confusion in their voice.

I try to meet their eyes, to see the pupils. "You got beaten pretty badly, do you feel alright?"

Our eyes finally meet. Something isn't right. The pupils dilate, and in them, there is something missing. A panic grips me. I search their gaze for an answer, "Detective?"

They blink, eyebrows furrowing, "...I..." a question is trying to escape. I find myself leaning in unconsciously. Finally, they ask.

"...Who... who are you?"

Now I think it's my time for widened eyes. I look for a jest, but there is none, this is true. Real.... Appetizing.

I cannot help the smile that splits my face as I take their hand, running my thumb over the ring.

"I am your's," I answer with sincerity, approaching to lean into them, my forehead on their perfect marble hand, "And you are mine."

What followed would have been rejection, hurtful words and dirty looks.

But instead, a calloused hand rests, tentatively, upon my head, feeling my hair for the first time.

Hello new home.

Let the renovation begin.

...

(How we feel about amnesiac Detective? :0) I wonder how long Waldo can keep up the lie...)

(If you like, support me on Ko-Fi via the link)

Buy me a Ko-Fi

[snowtamale]

oh. i’m realizing the reason i haven’t shipped anything in a few years is because i’m a slut for slow burn romances and nothing else

[stinkrascal]

also thank you to everyone who tagged me in your favorite simblrs post thingy, i appreciate y'all so very much. honestly its very easy to question my place in the community and more so lately since i havent been very active on simblr and that makes me feel like an outcast lol but i appreciate you guys for enjoying my antics nevertheless. makes me feel seen!! thanks for not forgetting about me i love you ok ❤

[kheyys-worms]

I don't talk much about penacony but have a meme i guess,,,

I mean, no offense Jade Leech but COME ON,,,

LOOK AT HER ✨✨✨

[yuwuta]

i politely demand you talk about your nge/pacrim au!

thank you for enabling my behavior and for all your art omg <33333 i will attempt to coherently and briefly outline my thoughts

the short version is: yuuta/rika saves you post-battle and both are irrationally upset when it turns out that you already have a boyfriend. 

yuuta would like to take some of the credit for digging you out the rubble, but the truth is, it was like his mech was on auto-pilot, overriding all of his controls to dig you out of a lifeless environment and stash your cold, limp body in the center chamber until yuuta and rika were transported back to the base. 

yuuta doesn’t understand why he lost control of rika like that, nor does he understand why he feels so upset when he goes to visit you in the infirmary and there’s already some other man by your bedside holding your hand. he vaguely recognizes kokichi as a junior engineer who’s done a few surface level repairs on rika, and he’s surprised and green with envy to find out that kokichi is also your boyfriend. 

yuuta doesn’t understand the anger he feels, or the headache he gets, or the panic attack that’s threatening to rise in him, or why his feet automatically drag him back to his mech, or why he feels like he could hear rika’s faint sobs and screams in his head and he lay in his pilot chamber. none of it makes sense and he can barely sleep because of it, but it happens every time he thinks about you and kokichi for too long; and strangely enough, if the thinks about how rika seemed to come to life to save you for too long. there’s some kind of missing link he can’t piece together. 

when you’re conscious, you can’t seem to recall any part your childhood, and only have your memories from college onwards, save for bits and pieces of the attack you were a victim of. yuuta learns that you were studying to be an engineer, that you were moving to work at the hangar and be closer to your boyfriend, that kokichi was slated to pick you up from the airport that ended up being the site of attack. a small part of yuuta wishes kokichi had been there, thinks that rika wouldn’t have found him in the rubble. 

you’re the miracle save, and somewhat become the baby of the hangar. world-renowned pilots you’d only ever studied in class stopped by to give you their condolences, offer their help. you try to remain calm when satoru gojo and kento nanami make an appearance as a duo in your tiny recovery room, calling you brave and bowing to you with a home cooked meal in hand. senior engineers do their best to recover your work from college, assuring you that your injuries and recovery period would be a non-factor in the hiring process—that you were free to start as soon as you felt comfortable. you get the most attention from yuuta, who makes himself a friend, and a critical part of your recovery, essentially firing your physical therapist in favor of fixing you himself. 

everyone makes you feel welcome, but yuuta makes you feel safe. he holds your waist while you re-learn to walk, he sneaks you into the pilot’s lounge while the jaegers have their repairs done—and nods in faux-sympathy as you mourn the presence of your boyfriend, who seems busier than ever these days with nuisance repairs, jokes about how yuuji and megumi seem to be particularly reckless with their jaeger lately—he squeezes your hand when you have headaches and fractured flashbacks of your past that you can’t piece together, he holds you when you cry out of pure frustration of not being able to remember who you are

yuuta’s a real smooth talker, too. always knows exactly how to comfort you while your boyfriend is busy, always talks to the press about you so preciously, always makes you feel like you have a purpose even if you can’t remember your past self—maybe you weren’t meant to remember anything before him and rika, maybe it was meant to be this way. it’s a twisted comfort, but it’s something to cling to, it’s better than crying over memories you no longer have.

everyone notices yuuta’s weird reverse stockholm syndrome lol… the way he hovers over you like he’s your sole protector and savior, the way he demands to be privy to all decisions about your health care, the way he remains close to you with no fear of your boyfriend. nobody says anything, though—yuuta’s a pilot, a good one, and one the few solo pilots in the entire world. he’s precious and vital to humanity, worth a thousand men, worth ten thousand engineers. besides, his friends see something special between you two, especially the co-pilot pairs; satoru and kento, megumi and yuuji, choso and yuki—they know compatibility when they see it, and boyfriend or not, you have something special with yuuta. they all share a common thought: kokichi is fighting a losing battle. and even if he could beat yuuta, he’d never win against rika.

[ajxrn-archive]

I need to be put in a waffle iron or something

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

[cws: discussion of parental abandonment, canon-typical grooming, emotional abuse, and poverty.]

-

headcanon: ricky's biodad ran out on his family when he was six. he took him along to the bus station, ruffled his hair, and said he'd be right back; and then he never did.

ricky was left waiting at the station, alone, until his mom finally showed up in a panic. she'd gotten back after work to find he hadn't come home from school, and she couldn't get hold of his dad over the phone; their marriage had already been rocky for a while, and when she couldn't find them her first assumption was that he'd taken ricky and left.

(sometimes ricky wonders whether he'd been thinking about it, and that's why he didn't just leave him at home to make a clean getaway. sometimes he wonders what he could have done at that last second to make him choose differently. he's glad he didn't--he doesn't regret growing up with his mom and he'd pick her over that asshole any day--but he wonders.)

this is also a major reason it was so easy for pericles to slip into the role he took in their family. being a sudden single parent meant his mom had to spend long hours working herself to the bone to provide for them, which meant that she had precious little time or energy left over for ricky even though she loved him dearly; after a couple years of that it must have seemed like a godsend for another adult to come along and be there for him, even if it broke her heart that she couldn't be there herself.

......which meant pericles had constant access to ricky--a kid with major abandonment and attachment issues, and a hole in his life from the guardian who left him behind--and an overwhelming amount of input into his development as a person, without any parents around to notice his behavior.

(this would also provide context for ricky's fixation on wealth and hard work to establish a comfortable source of that--overwork no less, it's implied, and self-neglect. growing up in poverty will do that to you, as will guilt and worry and loneliness from seeing your parent bust their ass and sacrifice for you to keep your heads above water. add having internalized that work ethic from her into the mix, as well as the fact that he had to completely restart his life from scratch in a new city as a teenager with presumably no money, and it explains a few things.)

all this is a major part of why ricky takes it so hard that pericles, you guessed it, betrayed and abandoned him. (and ended up in a situation where ricky couldn't have contacted him to get closure or an explanation, no less, even if that part was something he couldn't control.) especially considering that on top of the betrayal itself, i get the strong impression that pericles exploited, encouraged, and cultivated his separation anxiety and dependence.

he worsened ricky's issues instead of helping him heal from them so he could position himself as his emotional support to cope with it (hi there, trauma bonding 🙃)..... and then he hurt him in about the worst possible way he could have, when it was his fault that it was so fucking devastating. and he doesn't seem to have even done it to be cruel. he just did it for his own ends, ends which ricky didn't understand or have context for for a long time, because ricky's wellbeing and relationship with him (and his actual physical safety!) was a perfectly acceptable sacrifice for whatever it was that he wanted.

sound familiar?

and he doesn't..... realize this. most of it not fully. he understands that pericles betrayed him and it was Bad, he's maybe connected some of his anger over it to his dad having walked out. but so, so much of what pericles did to him he doesn't know how to articulate, or even that it was wrong in the first place. all he has is his anger and loneliness and hurt and confusion, concentrated on the point where everything finally broke.

and when pericles waltzes back into his life and leans on that pressure point, ricky tries to tell him to fuck off at first; but because that's the only thing he realizes was fucked here, he thinks that being older and angrier and craftier and wiser, having built a life and safety net for himself without pericles and proved he doesn't need him, means he's ready this time. he's strong enough this time. when it comes to this one thing--and in return for every good thing he thinks it'll be a fair tradeoff for--he can keep his enemies close and come out on top.

he's not. and he can't. and we all know how that story ends.

there's a lot going on here. a lot. and i have thoughts about what the curse itself consists of. but i think ricky first started pursuing the treasure not for money or power or even out of spite, but because he wanted more than anything to understand what it was that pericles loved more than him.

[hag-lad]

Imma keep it real with you chief. I can’t even imagine still liking or caring about star wars in the year of our lord 2024.

[mercymaker]

i just want to sleep and rest and not have all this tummy pain

[skitskatdacat63]

The double-edged sword of enjoying Chicago and knowing basically all the songs by heart, but also can't stop crying every time I watch/listen to any of them bcs I can't stop thinking about how covid robbed me of getting the experience of ever performing it :(

[lemongrablothbrok]

Eeee! Lookee what I just got in the mail today from my baby brother!

[indi-glo-archive]

i hate imogen with a passion