#they need to make an angry mask emoji

[unganseylike]

guys i legitimately had a myimmortal moment like i saw a lot of preps staring at me i put my middle finger up at them except it was me flipping off people wearing trump hats on my train. but unlike ebony i got yelled at.

[thedreadvampy]

Guys I am BEGGING you to mask up if you're going to counterprotest the fash. They DO take photos and they DO spread them around their networks for targeting reasons.

This is not just targeted at people who consider themselves Serious Radgy Activists, antifa or anarchists.

This is for you, your mum who's angry about people targeting your neighbours, your nan who thinks the racists are being silly, your pals from the pub.

This is for everyone. We all need to stay safe at anti-racist demos.

It can feel paranoid, but things can escalate fast and it's hard to walk back once your photo's out there. A bit of overabundant caution when it's not 100% necessary is better than looking over your shoulder for years or getting jumped unexpectedly in the pub because of a photo you didn't even know was taken.

Honestly, especially with more and more police crackdowns against protesters, this is a good habit to get into at any protest or demo where there's the slightest chance of things kicking off, with fash or with cops.

You don't have to go full black bloc, but even if you're not planning on diving into the fray, stay safe - consider:

Cover your face. Wearing a mask can also help prevent COVID in your network, but if you don't have one or don't want to wear one, cover the bottom half of your face with a snood, balaclava, scarf, etc. If you need to eat, drink, smoke or vape, turn AWAY from the front of the line and ideally duck behind a banner or another person to do it. Keep masked until you're out of line of sight of the demo.

Cover your hair, especially if it's coloured or you have an interesting haircut. I usually part my mohawk down the middle and tie it to disguise the undercut, and bundle it up at the back to disguise the length, before I put on a hat or scarf - but I'm paranoid, and a hat, a headscarf or a hood will be fine. A baseball cap is good too - the brim further obscures your face from a lot of angles.

Cover up big tattoos, or tattoos that are highly identifiable from a distance. I have an upper arm sleeve and I'm honestly still working on summer options for this, but consider long sleeves for arm pieces, a light scarf/bandana for chest/neck tattoos, long trousers or leggings for leg tattoos, and/or gloves if you have hand tattoos (often the easiest to identify cause they're rarer). Even mesh or fishnet can be ok, or in a pinch you can use plasters or draw over it with a felt tip - you don't necessarily need to hide it fully if that's too hard, but try and make it harder to recognise.

If there's an accessory you often have on you in your regular life - colourful shoes, a bag with a fun design, exciting glasses frames, favourite earrings, etc - consider swapping it out for a more generic option. You don't want to put loads of effort into covering your face then get jumped on the way to work because someone recognised your backpack!

Don't help the fash out - if you take any photos, try to avoid including people's faces or tattoos as much as possible. If you post pics on socials, give them a quick once-over and consider putting an emoji or drawing over anyone's face visible.

If you see photos of someone you know at a demo, let them know (especially if they've come from rightwing accounts). If you see one of the fash taking photos, warn people and make the effort to help others cover up if they need it.

We haven't seen fascist/white nationalist mobilisation at this scale in a long time, and most people trying to help haven't dealt with this shit before. The risk factors are different to protests you may have gone on before.

Fash do sometimes come back and target people individually outside of demos if they've marked you out as an enemy. Keep safe, keep covered, keep together.

Few additional safety/security tips:

Once you've arrived at the demo, don't go anywhere alone until you're well away from the area. Stick with a buddy or a group you feel safe with and you're less likely to be jumped. Definitely don't leave on your own.

Cops are not your friends! They've been arresting as many anti-racist activists as racist ones. so remember: no comment, no personal details, don't tell them anything, and this includes blue bib PLOs. If they tell you to do something, ask 'under what power' and if they can't demonstrate that you're legally required, don't.

Don't drink or do drugs at a demo - you're adding risk for everyone around you

If you have your phone with you, make sure it's password-locked. We all sometimes lose or drop our phones and if it gets into the wrong hands you want it to be secure.

If you don't want to risk fighting, that's ok - numbers are still super important and tbh most of us aren't super keen on throwing down. Make sure that if things do seem like they might kick off and you don't think you can defend yourself, that you're moving towards the centre of the crowd and that you're not out on your own.

Look out for each other. Step in if someone's being harassed or attacked - step in as a group so you have more backing, if possible. If you're white, even if you're not able/up for fighting, it can be helpful to be part of a human barrier around people who are more likely to be targeted (eg people of colour and people who are wearing hijab/are otherwise visibly Muslim). When you're surrounded by other people, you're way less likely to get attacked.

If the fash seem to have gone, don't immediately disperse and don't post on socials that you're leaving. Especially if you're defending a specific place, it's very easy for them to wait till you've gone and come back later - give it at least an hour after the expected fash action, ideally longer.

On the flip side, don't be the last small group of people left standing. The usual rule for higher-risk demos is 'when we leave, we leave together as one' - however, for community defence, as above, doing that too early can out the people you're defending at greater risk. However, if there's like 5 of you there when 20 fash come back, you might be screwed - unless you're confident you can handle yourself, try to make sure the counterprotest crowd doesn't fall below 10-15 people. If it does, and you haven't specifically planned for that, you should consider calling it quits and leaving together.

If you're traveling to and from a demo on public transport, keep security in mind - you and the fash may be traveling to and from the same place. As much as possible, stay with buddies. Put away any signs and try not to look like you've just come from a protest. If you feel nervous, consider taking a more roundabout route home, or hopping off the train partway and getting back on the next one.

Don't do the fash's work for them. It's tempting to repost white nationalist calls to action to warn people, but you're kind of just spreading their rhetoric along with it. Instead, keep info to places, times and groups - you don't need to include the fearmongering about immigrants!

Don't post about where you are in too much detail, for the same reason - especially hotels and refuges!!! Fash are targeting those places for a reason, and when you've gone home, the people they're targeting are still there. If you post "we're at X hotel where asylum seekers live," could the wrong person see that and think "oh, that's where the bastards live, I'll remember that"? Remember, it's people's basic safety we're here to defend! Similarly, think about how much detail you share about tactics, who told you or how they knew - on social media you're not only talking to your own side.

also Stand Up To Racism have been at the forefront of a lot of these counterprotests. there's a whole sordid history there which mean a lot of people hate them, but more immediately they're just not always the best example of practical security. Just today they called time on a demo in Newcastle before the advertised fash demos were even due to start, and they are often very free with information and with people's photos. don't take your lead from them! they're playing a role in coordinating things, but ultimately they are not prepared when it comes to keeping either activists or the communities we're protecting safe.

if in doubt, skew on the side of caution - cover up more, share less info, stay in larger groups for longer, and stay later. If you come alone, it's ok to attach yourself to the side of an existing group - they'll understand.

[bluenightcomedies]

uuuugh i keep procrastinating cuz i wanna make new refs n' arts n' all for us all but art slow so fuggit placeholder pinned abt the system better pinned with comm details, other accs, etc later :3 will reopen for commissions once arty verifies me! as a whole we're legally deaf and disabled! we can all draw but have diff styles/preferences :3 body is 30 (eugh i don't like admitting that) so am adult BUT we don't wanna be involved in nsfw art so pls respect that⭐ We can't get a formal diagnosis due to various real life issues, so we're not going to claim any particular diagnosis, but we can't exactly ignore the symptoms and stay masked forever. We're going to stay out of syscourse as much as possible, of course. 🌙 each alter has an assigned emoji so ppl can tell us apart easier if needed, use em as our tags too (when we remember) note- using they/them for any of us fine too!⭐

(doesn't include alters that rarely or never front) ⭐star emoji = Blue! she/her pls~ guess i'm the honorary host cuz i front most. uhhh... nothing rly too fancy i can say abt myself, i'm p affectionate and love y2k art and hanging out, i try to be as nice as i can >w< my art's usually sketchbooky, with thin lines and soft colors/shading!

💠this blue gem/flower emoji is Azure! she/her, she's kinda new to the system. looks n' acts a lot like me but uh... more childish i guess? very silly, very 'cringe culture is dead'. loves to rp, say silly things, n' cling to people. hyperfixates on Dot Hack (RIP) her art looks like mspaint x3 🌙 (Writing for myself since I'm available.) The name's Lune, hence moon emoji, and I use she/her pronouns as well. Formerly "Starry" but people kept confusing me with Blue due to her star symbolism. Used to be the designated mask, I'm glad I don't have to do that anymore... Sometimes I re-mask out of habit so if something sounds like me but wasn't marked as an alter, it probably is me. I have a flat tone and chronic paranoid anxiety so uh... Let me know if I come across as rude, I usually don't mean to. I enjoy doing research and organizing information, so I'm often the one to fact-check things or find guides and how-to's for the system. My art's very bold and colorful, and friends describe it as 'angular'. Clashes with my personality, huh? 🗝️key emoji = Sylverwynd! he uses he/him! he's super laid back and chill, i've never seen him upset or anything, but he's rly long-winded talks... kinda poet-y? he loves reading and talking abt lore and myths so he'll pop in if ur talking abt something he likes or if he has trivia 2 share! fave genres r horror n' fantasy he's still experimenting w/ style but likes drawing rly soft

❌cross emoji= Laceburner! it/its or they/them pronouns! tbh i'm not used to it/its pronouns but Lace wanted em; it's very uh... emotionally empty i guess? aroace, agender, can't socialize or empathize v well. it usually fronts when the rest of us are tired or in pain cuz it just ignores all that. likes 2000's scenemo aesthetics though which is surprising but ye idk how to describe its style, but it's trying to mimic emo art n' likes bright colored lines with dark bg/colors 🗡️the dagger is Kal! he/him pronouns, he gets angry and stressed abt things really easy but he gets too hostile abt it so he tries to not front too much; need to find him a way to de-stress n' chill out... when he's not mad at smth he's a good sympathetic listener imo, still swears and talks all rough tho hasn't drawn much yet but does rly harsh lines and fast/messy sketches when he does (and gets riled up by mistakes =w=;)

❤️heart is Weiss! genderfluid, goes by any pronouns, usually uses whatever they like at the time x3 has a hard time fronting but tries to. flirty, loves dumb jokes, overly confident... (we worry they'd get us in trouble sometimes cuz the shit they want to say) loves demon and monster-related stuff! still experimental style but uses bold colors and thick rough lines a lot, may get suggestive (forbidden from outright nsfw, don't ask >:c) btw ur always welcome to direct asks @ someone specific >w< we just might take a while to respond

[yxnderewrites]

Hi hun! So I'm a big fan of your writing and I have a request! Could you do a yandere alphabet with all letters with yandere Sam or Colby or all yandere emoji prompts with yandere Sam or Colby?

Just which one that sounds easiest! Sorry if this breaks a rule or is too much. Thank you so much if you do my request! Please take care of yourself and have a great day/night!

-💛

of course! and thank you so much!! 🥰🖤

i’ll be doing this request in three other parts which i’ll link once i finish them! :)

Yandere!Sam Golbach Alphabet (All Prompts) 🖤

Attachment: How do they become obsessed?

It was a love at first sight for Sam. When he first saw you, it was like something inside of him clicked and he knew that he just had to have you one way or another.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get for their darling?

He wouldn't get messy as he would be afraid he would let something slip or leave something out so that he would get caught. He wouldn't be physically threatening, but mentally threatening towards others, but never to the reader.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling when they kidnap them? Would they mock them?

Kidnapping would be a very last resort for Sam. He would only kidnap you when he realizes he is at a dead end. So, when he would kidnap you, he would treat you the best he can. So, no, he would never mock you once he kidnaps you.

Delusion: How delusional are they when it comes to their darling? Do they believe their darling loves them?

I think he may be delusional when you show affection towards him, but that is only so you could find a way out. So, unless he figures out what you're up to (which he would after some time), he would be delusional at those certain moments.

Erratic: How unpredictable are they? How quick are mood changes?

Sam would never be unpredictable around you. He wouldn't let you, or try not to let you, see his mood changes, whether it be because of you or because of someone else. So, his mood changes aren't very abrupt/quick either.

Fight: How would they react if their darling fought back?

He would be so upset. Not with you, but with himself. In that moment, he would realize his wrong-doings and try his best to fix the situation he put you in in that moment and every day after that.

Guilt: What would it take for them to feel guilty about their actions? Or do they feel guilt from the start?

Honestly, it wouldn't take much for Sam to feel guilty. Just seeing you cry would make him feel so guilty and so upset with himself that he makes/made you so upset and angry at him.

Hell: What would be their darling's worse experience with them?

In all honesty, it would just be the kidnapping, if it were to get to that point (which it would). He just wouldn't be able to truly hurt you in any way physically.

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Sam would definitely want you two living together at some point in the future. Also, he would want you to appear in some of his videos and show him off, if he feels you are capable in being on camera "normally."

Jealous: What makes them the most jealous?

Whenever someone else is showing affection to you that only he believes he can show to you.

Kidnap: How would they go about kidnapping their darling? How much do they plan out?

He would plan everything very carefully in order for his plan to be flawless, as he would not want to go back to jail. So, he would have everything he would need as far as things he would need the day or night of acting out his plan.

Love Letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

Sam seems like a very simplistic man in my eyes, so it would start with talking through messages, bringing up topics that he knows you are interested in, just don't ask how he knows those things.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they acted before?

Honestly, no. He would still be the same person as he has always been.

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

He can't bring himself to do physical harm to you, so the worst that he would do is isolation, but that's only if his anger gets the best of him, which is very rare.

Outrage: What makes them furious?

Whenever you ignore him for a long period of time, which is quite often at first.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

Sam is definitely very patient with his darling because he has an understanding of why you may be upset and/or angry, so he would be very patient with you.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

The brief answer is no. If you died, he would become hollow inside pretty much and almost leave the face on the earth on social media. If you left or successfully escaped, he would be up all day and all night searching for you, even if it would take days, weeks, and/or months.

Rage: How do they act when angry? How do they calm down?

He mostly just yells/screams, whether at you or just at nothing. He mostly calms down by trying to get some reassurance from you, if it ever gets to that point.

Self-Indulgent: How possessive are they? (if at all?)

Sam is very possessive over you rather than obsessive in my mind. He would absolutely be overly possessive over you, mainly in social events (for obvious reasons of course).

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry and/or isolate themselves?

His heart would literally shatter into pieces because he would know that he is the cause for your tears and your isolation away from him. Even though he knows this, he would try his best in any way to comfort you to the best of his ability.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

He would perhaps give you slightly more freedom in a shorter span of time since as mentioned before, he wouldn't like to isolate you too much.

Vicious: How vicious can they get?

Honestly, not at all. Sam is someone who tries to keep calm when he's around you all the time and most of the time, it does work.

Weakness: What weaknesses can their darling exploit in order to escape?

In my mind, Sam loves spending time with you, whether it just be sitting next to him while he's editing a video or you and him are watching something together. With that, he would let you be by yourself more often as he would think you have trusted him fully.

Xenodochia: How quickly would their darling cut them off after escape?

It would be hard for a long time because Sam would treat you very well throughout being with him. So, it would be very difficult for you since he would almost give you everything you could ever dream of and more.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

As mentioned before, Sam is very patient when it comes to you, so maybe half a year to a year, depending on what may happen.

Zero Tolerance: What is the thing that always makes them snap? What things would they not allow their darling to do under any circumstances?

Whenever you talk about someone that has done you wrong (which he knows, just don't ask how) since he knows that they were not good to you and should only talk about the positives in your life.

[666writingcafe]

Someone Has An Attitude

A Text Conversation Between Simeon, Levi, and MC That Occurs After Diavolo (Reluctantly) Approves The Outline of the Play

MC: Levi?

Levi: *question mark emoji*

MC: We need your help.

Levi: *question mark emoji*

Simeon: We have the story and characters figured out for our play, so our next step is figuring out the costumes.

Simeon: We'd really like you to be in charge of that. What do you say?

Levi: *sticker of crow saying no and shaking its head*

Levi: Not until you pass my quiz!

MC: *glaring crow sticker*

MC: Is that really necessary?

Levi: I don't believe that Simeon wrote TSL. I need evidence.

Simeon: Alright, Leviathan. Hit us with your best shot.

Levi: The following excerpt is from The Tale of the Seven Lords, Volume 5, page 307: "The Lord of Masks was so named because he wore a mask at all times. He did this to hide the intense anger he felt toward the Lord of Corruption."

MC: That must have been one weak mask, then.

Simeon: *gif of someone drinking tea*

Levi: *angry crow sticker*

Levi: That's not the point!

Levi: ANYWAY.

Levi: The horns of a certain animal were painted onto this mask. What animal was it?

MC: A goat.

Levi: Wrong!

Levi: It was a sheep.

Levi: Guess you'll have to find someone else to make your costumes.

Simeon: Only in the first edition.

Levi: What??????

Simeon: Your copy of Volume 5 must be a first edition. It actually wasn't supposed to say sheep, but rather goat.

Simeon: The Celestial word for goat is incredibly similar to the one for sheep, so I can understand how both the translator and the publisher made the initial mistake. However, once I brought the error to their attention, it was corrected from the second edition onward.

Simeon: So, MC is actually correct.

Levi: *surprised crow sticker*

Levi: *surprised crow sticker*

Levi: *surprised crow sticker*

Simeon: Do you believe me now, Leviathan?

Levi: *flapping crow sticker*

Levi: You're the great Christopher Peugeot!

Simeon: That's my pen name, yes.

Levi: You're a god among men!

Levi: I mean angels.

Levi: I'M NOT WORTHY!

MC: Does this mean that you'll make the costumes for the play?

Simeon: I don't think he's going to answer for a bit, MC.

MC: True.

MC: He's probably paralyzed from shock.

Simeon: Levi, I will send you a synopsis of the play so far and a breakdown of each role. You can look through everything at your leisure.

Levi: I could die right here and now with no regrets!

MC: Please don't. If you do, we'd have to ask Asmo.

Levi: Don't you dare! He'll sully the great Christopher Peugeot's sacred fantasy realm with his filth!

Simeon: I wouldn't necessarily dismiss eroticism as filth. It IS a valid art form.

MC: *surprised crow sticker*

Levi: Not where my brother is concerned.

Simeon: Whatever you say.

MC: *surprised crow sticker*

[lixiehugs]

dohee profile

tw : mentions of bullying

BASICS !!

stage name : dohee (hangul: 도희) birth name : wang dohee (hangul: 왕도희) english name : dina wang nicknames : dodo, do, doidoi, doi, hee, doing

birth date : october 8th, 2002 zodiac : libra birthplace : seoul, south korea hometown : boston, usa

ethnicity : korean nationality : south korean languages : korean (100% — native), english (90% — fluent), mandarin chinese (15% — beginner)

PHYSICAL !!

height : 178 cm or 5'10 weight : 54 kg or 118 lbs blood type : b

eye color : brown natural hair : brown, wavy

body modifications : 10 piercings, 2 tattoos face claim : wekimeki lua vocal claim : aespa karina/nmixx sullyoon rap claim : aespa karina

CAREER !!

agencies : hybe labels (2017 - present) training period(s) : 2017 - 2019 group(s) : tomorrow x together subunit(s) : n/a positions : maknae

individual fandom : dodos (after the bird and the similarities to her name) representative emoji : 🦤 (dodo because it is one of her nicknames) social media : @/www.dohee.com on instagram and @/txt_members on twitter

best known for : being the female member of txt. being an autistic kpop idol. her mental health//disabilities representation. her ALWAYS being on beat when dancing. fantastic freestyle dance. being an ace.

PERSONAL !!

mbti : intj-t

positive traits : bubbly. very fun and nice. silly. very loyal. very organised. absolutely adorable. very honest. quite serious but can understand some jokes/sarcasm. funny just by existing. independent (most of the time). very genuine and puts her soul into everything she does.

negative traits : gets attached easily. no concept of time (which causes her to overwork herself). gets angry quite easily but tries to hide it. masks her emotions a lot. has difficulty with change and new environments (to do with autism).

habits : hand flapping. light stomping when excited. rocking. other tics. imitating sounds/words she hears. dinosaur hands. vocal and physical stimming. tapping things. smacking things. stabbing her nails into her palm when stressed. can’t hold eye contact for longer than a few seconds. needing to touch new things and either rubbing it because it feels nice or visibly recoiling. blinking deeply/repetitively.

hobbies : listening to music. dancing! gaming. reading + writing. producing music. painting. crocheting. doing anything to do with art. going shopping. doing everyone’s hair + makeup. going to the gym (sometimes).

BACKSTORY !!

wang dohee was born on october 8th, 2002 to a korean mother and korean father. her mother, wang rina (born 1973) is a volunteer worker for homeless shelters around seoul. her father, wang eungyeol (born 1970) is a software engineer currently working in seoul, south korea.

dohee was born in seoul, south korea as the first child in her family. the pregnancy was very rough for her mother, so despite wanting to have more children, dohee remained an only child. only having one child to focus on, dohee became very close with her parents. she considered them her best friends all throughout her school years and was always happy to come home to them at the end of the day. when dohee had to move out to become a trainee, she was very homesick and missed her parents so much even though she would still see them every weekend and they were not even an hour away.

when dohee was two years old, her family moved to boston, usa. they lived there until dohee turned eleven, as her parents were worried about her deteriorating korean skills. dohee excelled at her korean secondary school, being especially good at the sciences and maths, her arts grades were also superb. dohee graduated two years early, skipping both her sixth and ninth grade years. dohee had trouble making friends and experienced some bullying in secondary school due to many issues. because of this, her parents wanted her to explore some of her interests outside of school, thus leading to her joining a local dance crew in january 2014.

FACTS !!

dohee became a trainee in august of 2017.

she used to be able to speak better english than korean but since moving back, that has changed. 

her parents can speak english well, but dohee is better. 

after moving back to korea, dohee struggled to make friends and had some bullying issues. so, her parents wanted her to explore her interests outside of school, thus allowing her to join a local dance crew in january 2014.

this dance crew entered lots of competitions where dohee could compete in group routines and as a soloist. this also gave her the chance to try out many different styles of dance. 

at one of their competitions in july 2017, dohee was scouted by a bighit employee for her hiphop solo.

her favorite styles of dance are hiphop and modern.

dohee is also quite flexible, but she rarely shows off her skills. 

dohee is ambidextrous. 

she is musically gifted/a musical genius; having perfect pitch, the ability to sight read, and being able to play many different instruments.

her best instrument is piano, but she is getting better at the flute. 

dohee was diagnosed with autism and ocd when she was four years old after her parents grew concerned about some behavioral patterns. 

she does not have any medication for her autism. she has a medication for her ocd which she takes daily.

due to her neurodivergence, dohee has a near photographic memory. she can remember almost any song she’s ever heard, even if it’s for the first time, she can remember any face or name of any person she’s ever met, she is also great with naming movies and tv shows based off of theme songs, casts, quotes, screenshots, etc.

because of her dance background and partly because of her autism, dohee has an insane ability of always being on time while dancing/singing. if a song starts randomly in the middle, she can pick up the choreography and lyrics instantly. 

her reaction time is also wild!! (like that one video of yeonjun dancing immediately after song starts)

also due to her autism, dohee is a very fast talker. it is natural for her; she’s been like this since she was learning how to talk. 

with this ability, she was able to become a very skilled rapper.

her favorite colors are pink and blue.

she loves playing minecraft!!!

she also loves story and puzzle-type games.

dohee is a cat person.

her favorite kpop artists are hyunA, seventeen, red velvet, taeyeon, mamamoo, and nct 127.

her favorite western artists are sabrina carpenter, lana del rey, madison beer, selena gomez, and cavetown.

her favorite movie is the lion king. 

dohee is a huge nerd. 

she loves the harry potter books. 

her favorite season is winter. 

she loves playing in the snow!!

dohee is very in-touch with her inner child. 

dohee has had an emotional support cat since 2013. she has a somali/fox cat. her name is kyongi!

dohee also has an official service dog which she takes everywhere with her. she has a black labrador called chanho. 

dohee crochets!!!

she’s also really gay!!!

the boys have said that when dohee sleeps she makes this grumbling sound. she only does it when she moves in her sleep. the boys have many videos of her doing this.

[depressedhatakekakashi]

Kakashi, for all the questions.

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?

I love Kakashi because he's dorky, kind-hearted, always trying his best even when the world is against him, and just generally a really good dude even though he has some pretty solid reasons to turn cold and angry to the world.

I dislike that he doesn't know what is too much in training (that genjutsu he put Sakura under on day one, my DUDE), that he wants to save Sasuke and see's how much Sasuke means to Sakura and Naruto but continues to support Konoha and admonishes Sasuke for his anger, that he continues to hero worship Obito after finding out all the horrible things he did, and that he's such a rude ass sometimes (but also i kinda love that he's a rude ass. it depends on the situation lol)

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

that he's so open and friendly even after all he has lost. this man has every reason to close his heart off to new people and avoid creating new bonds but instead, he opens his heart wider and becomes friends with people in an instant without concern or restriction. even when he has just fought them.

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?

his hero worship. not even just of Obito, but of people like Minato and even Lord Third (though that one is much less. He seem's to recognize that Lord Third is kinda trash but also doesn't question Naruto when he hero worships the old man)

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?

so MANY THINGS.

Pokemon and Star Trek are my main two though. Places where he'll excel and his intelligence can really shine through.

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

I'm a Mess by Bebe Rexha

The Other Side by Huge Jackman and Zach Efron

Rescue Me by One Republic

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

You want a list?

Kakashi's the worst Sensei.

Depression = Incapable of caring for himself

Kakashi did nothing for the plot (huge plot points require Kakashi and his past to even make sense at all)

Kakashi's so weak (against gods ya, but among regular ass shinobi he's top tier)

Kakashi taught Sakura, Sasuke and Naruto nothing (straight up lies)

Kakashi didn't care about Sakura (lies)

Kakashi favoured Sasuke (Lies again. Seeing parts of himself in Sasuke and knowing Sasuke needed extra aid/protection due to the current circumstances =\= favoritism)

Kakashi didn't care about Gai (LIES LIES LIES LIES LIES)

9. Could you be roommates with this character?

Probably. He's cannonly very neat and organized. Would get his ass kicked for keeping his shoes on inside, but otherwise i think we'd get along <3

10. Could you be best friends with this character?

Yes, definitly. He's lots of fun and generally just nice and that's all I need to be friends with someone. Plus he'll choose me as a friend without issue and make me mingle with people which is exactly what i need

11. Would you date this character?

*Shoves Kakashi out of the way* Absolutely not. I do not want to be dating someone who reminds me of myself. Give me Gai instead thanks :)

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

I headcanon that he has fangs and that he wears his mask because he realized everytime he smiled his father got a little sad so he wanted to hide his smile. He never realized this was because his smile is a copy and paste of his mother's and Sakumo was seeing his wife in Kakashi.

13. What's an emoji, an emoticon and/or any symbol that reminds you of this character or you think the character would use a lot?

what a time to be on my laptop instead of my phone XD

Umm any dog Emoji as well as the thumbs up emoji

14. Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character.

Terrible.

Man doesn't know what fashion is and i appreciate that for him. If i had to choose a specific fashion i'd go with the 'History professor' or 'Literary professor' fashion. whichever one has sweater vests XD

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not.)

KAKAGAI (Though i'm sure no one is surprised by that XD)

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?

Ummm so not counting one's that make me uncomfertable/i won't interact with at all

KakaO*bi and KakaR*n are probably at the top, but right next to them would be KakaM*i.(censored so it doesn't go into the ship tags cuz that's rude)

17. What's a ship for this character you don't hate but it's not your favorite that you're fine with?

KakaAn*o. I used to really love the ship but the way some (most) of the shippers treat it i just lost interest so hard, but can still write for/enjoy it in my own little bubble

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?

Kakashi and Gai!!! I love their friendship so much T.T it's sweet and they rely on each other so much.

19. How about a relationship they have in canon that you don't like?

Kakashi's relationship with Minato <\3 I wish Kakashi had been allowed to get angry with his Sensei, and the people who put a teenager in charge of a broken traumatized child. I hate how he views Minato as this great person who did so much but refuses to understand that he did MORE (largely cuz he survived longer but still) and i loath that he looks at Minato as some sort of hero and never recognizes that the way Minato handled him as a Sensei were terrible and made a lot of his situations worse/did nothing to actually help. Like, Kakashi screwed up as a Sensei but you can tell he's trying his best and genuinely cares about his students.

With Minato it feels like Kakashi was a burden to him that he didn't want to deal with most of the time.

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

Kakashi and Gai is the obvious choice

But also Yamato. I really hate how Canon did Yamato so dirty when he was clearly Kakashi's other best friend who deserved a lot more respect and care.

[thingsthatdontevencomebackaround]

Woke up this morning realizing that life is too short to hedge your bets or let bad faith argumentation stand on its own terms, so here we go, I'm forcing myself to be ready to tell this story. It's New Year party 2023 and my cousin, maybe a little drunk, lays out his grand political theory, and I listen because he sounded so close to being right in the argument's early stages— but hey turns out an anti-corporate attitude finds a way to slot into even the most pro-capitalism worldview, so, that's egg on my face I guess. I'm trying hard to make this coherent, but like somehow he managed to make the idea that you have to take somebody's word on their own gender out to be, an anti-trans argument instead of like, the whole point? Because of sleeper agents or something? It's possible to lie about your own gender, therefore... something.

He says ultimately, that any political movement has three types of members: the true believers, the wolves-or-whatever, and some third thing (probably the one you're guessing right now), and I guess that that's all an argument for Radical Centrism, where any political action outside of some light voting is Bad and Misguided. You hear this kind of thing on conservative-leaning nontalk radio all the time, deejay panel shows at rock stations in red states, making fun of Both Sides to make themselves out more reasonable like there's anything reasonable about having voted Trump twice— and hey! speaking of the radio.

My cousin said he'd called into a progressive radio program to warn them about the sleeper agents, and that they'd told him his mask was slipping, bro. (The way he told it, he was only laying out the radically centrist parts of his argument, not really getting into the faschy stuff, but I don't know, maybe his mask really *was* slipping— they love invoking Hitler so that they can imitate him, framing him as being bad and wrong so they can invoke him in polite society but really laying into that angry German ranting and gesticulating; I suspect he may have done a little bit of that act on air boy oh boy.) Also of course the radically centrist idea that it's only the left-leaning radio program that needs to be warned in such a way? And viewing everything left-of-center as a political monoculture in lockstep groupthink— but I guess I see why the Right (and Center blegghh) can view it that way, because most lefty types really do tend to be the third-thing category and so from the outside it probably looks like everyone else is along for the ride with the most "extreme" voices running the show; like heck, friggin, I didn't say anything at the New Year's party, because the man's entitled to his opinion! And it's this third-thing tendency that makes the focus on "warning" the lefty spaces instead of the righty ones about the wolves so baffling, because, can you even imagine a conservative trying to infiltrate an antifascist movement for any length of time, when my cousin can't even talk politics for fifteen minutes without imitating Hitler? It'd be far more likely to have a progressive type keeping their head down in a conservative environment, by my reckoning; my writing this post is sort of a first step in breaking out of that attitude!

It's tough of course, not to mention a slippery slope into Debate, and it requires a willingness to be wrong, and a need to be informed, and of course the fact that nobody ever changes their mind ever 😉 (hey great emoji suggestion autofiller, 😀 and the hits keep coming good job buddy) but this is just about calling out bad faith arguments themselves and maaaybe dismantling some of their logic. Like I said, life's too short to let that stand, and life's too short to hedge your bets. But f'sure life's too short to get into stupid debates with bad-faith-argumenters as well, and doubly so!

[grasslandgirl]

HELLO oh I am :eyes emoji: at every single thing on that list, your wips sound so. cool! absolutely dying to hear more about leverage ot3 amnesia ideas & juno steel and the case of the lost memories, whatever you are interesting in sharing <3

oh with JOY will i talk about these jade, with JOY!!

i'm gonna put this below a cut cause i'm gonna answer and give snips for both and it's gonna get LONG bc i Cannot Shut Up xox

for the leverage ot3 amnesia au i dont have a TON written, it was more just a collection of amnesia au ideas for all three of them that i was putting down so as not to forget them- i'm such a sucker for amnesia aus where the concrete memories are gone, but the sense memories and the gut instincts, and the muscle memory remains; and i think that trope carries over really interestingly to the leverage ot3-- parker who feels herself physically relaxed around these two strange men she doesn't know, eliot who instinctively lets these strangers touch him because some part inside of him he can't remember knows they won't hurt him, etc etc

i haven't written a ton of it, but i do have a dash of eliot pov i'll slide your way <33

Everything’s fuzzy. Eliot hates when things are fuzzy. He blinks against the crust in his eyes, but whatever room he’s in is clinically bright. His mouth is dry and his whole body is a single dull ache- heavy medication. Someone’s drugging him. In the back of his mind, Eliot’s furious about that; wants to rage until everything is burned out of his system and he can think clearly again, but he can’t remember why.  Why he’s- wherever he is. Why he hates mind-numbing medication so badly. Why he needs it in the first place.  The alarms in the back of his head are clanging- telling him, danger, threats, wake up, get up, fight your way out- but Eliot has to fight to open his eyes all the way.  He’s in a hospital. And- yeah, okay, that makes sense; even if it ignites the same anxious-angry pit in his stomach the meds do. Glaring halogen ceiling lights and clinical white walls and a softly beeping heart monitor and an IV plugged into his arm (he fights the urge to rip it out, if only for the moment) and- a man. Sitting in the chair next to him.

:)))) eliot pov my beloved....... i should write more leverage fic, huh?

and then SIMILARLY juno steel and the case of the missing memories is ALSO an amnesia au ksjvnskfjvnsfb

the concept was that at some point vaguely s3 on the carte blanche, juno gets a bad hit and loses all his memories of basically the plot of the show- so he can remember everything before the case of the murderous mask- but he doesn't remember anything with the kanagawas, or meeting nureyev, or the martian pill, or losing his eye, etc etc etc

so he wakes up on this ship- off mars for the first time in his life- still in a pre-s1 headspace, with only one eye and a bunch of people he doesn't know. and rita :)

tbh i only got like. a couple eps into s3 of junoverse and then never got caught back up (whoops) so like. idk what really happens during s3 and this fic was a big project in terms of like. going back to s1 juno characterization and foiling that against who s3 juno is and who s3 peter is, and how this kind of regression effects their relationship (or lack thereof, at the outset of the fic, bc they're not together yet) and while i did and do think it's really interesting, it was also like. a big thing to undertake and i got wary of like. characterizing juno effectively in it? and i wanted to slow roll him regaining his memories in bits and pieces and was having trouble pacing that effectively, and so it ended up on a back burner i never returned to </3 alas

but maybe someday when i finally go back and relisten to and catch up on tpp i'll go back and wirte more of it! in the mean time, have some snips:

He heard soft footsteps, almost silent, sliding across the hard floors of the ship behind him. Juno froze on instinct, senses sharpening to a knife’s point as he tried to focus on the steps over the blasting audio from Rita’s stream. If Rita noticed Juno stiffening, she didn’t say anything. Even though Rita had told him, again and again, that he could trust his fellow crew members aboard the Carte Blanche, that they were a family, Juno couldn’t shake the paranoia he’d known his whole life. He didn’t trust easy, he’d learned that the hard way over and over again as all the people he’d let into his life had betrayed or abandoned him. Except Rita. If he’d ever known how, Juno had long since forgotten how to be a part of a family, and this motley crew of criminals was no exception.  The footsteps neared, and Juno’s mind- as fuzzy and slow-moving as it still was, even three days after whatever accident he’d had- spun, trying to remember where the closest gun was, just in case. In his periphery, Juno saw the figure approaching. Tall, with taller hair and narrow shoulders- Ransom.  Some of the tension dropped from Juno’s shoulders. He still didn’t trust Ransom, there was something off about the guy, something about how he watched Juno and spoke so carefully around him that made Juno think he was hiding something. But there was something- a gut feeling Juno had about him. A deja vu kind of trust and comfort and uncertainty. Juno didn’t remember where it came from, but it was there. He trusted Ransom more than anyone else on the ship, other than Rita, even though that wasn’t saying much. Ransom came close enough to catch Juno’s eye. Raised his eyebrow in a silent question- the same one every person on the ship asked him every time they saw him: do you remember me yet? Juno shrugged, trying not to dislodge Rita too much. Ransom nodded, his expression never changing from the smooth, impassive mask he always wore. It itched at Juno, that impassivity. He wanted to know what was under it, wanted to know what Ransom was really thinking in that pretty head of his. The only people who were that careful and inscrutable were people with something to hide. Juno was a PI- he should know. As Ransom turned to walk away, Juno realized that the closest entrance to Ransom’s quarters was on his blind side. That he’d gone the long way around the ship to enter and exit within view of Juno’s periphery. Something uncertain and heavy and familiar squeezed in Juno’s stomach.

[i can't help another snippet, it's taking everythig i have not to give like three more on top of this, i forgot how good this au was skjfnvsfb sav from two years ago was crazy]

“Juno,” Ransom said, his voice infuriatingly even.  “Ransom-” that was the other thing. The other muscle-sense-memory bullshit that made Juno’s head ache. It felt- wrong, every time he called him Ransom. Every time Juno saw him, or thought about him or started to say his name, he had to correct himself, make himself say Ransom; instead of the other name he had rattling around in his head. He didn’t know where it came from, or why he associated it so strongly with Ransom, but Juno was ready to fucking know who Peter Nureyev was, and why he could’t stop thinking about him. Patience wasn’t ever a strong suit for Juno.  He bit the bullet. “Why do I have another name for you in my head, Ransom?” There. The flash of- of something, of emotion Juno had been waiting for. It was brief, something Juno might’ve missed if he hadn’t been looking so closely for any kind of reaction, but it was there. Shock, uncertainty, grief, flickered across Ransom’s face before settling back into his perpetual inscrutability.  “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean, Juno,” Ransom said, but there was a tremor, barely there, under his composed tone. Juno had shaken him, and he was going to get answers, damnit, come hell or high water. “Really?” Juno challenged, and he’d forgotten a lot, but he hadn’t forgotten this: the chase, the interrogation, cornering somebody into admitting and confessing and telling Juno what he wanted- what he needed- to hear. “Then who the hell is Peter Nureyev?” There it was again; the flickering, uncertain emotion, the disappearance of Ransom’s composure, the twist in Juno’s stomach that meant he was onto something.  “I- Juno, do you-” “No.” Ransom’s face fell, if infinitesimally. “I don’t- remember. Not really, but there’s… I don’t remember you, but I look at you and my brain says Nureyev, and I don’t fucking know why.”

:))) i just reread this whole wip- and it's almost 7k long- bc i didnt remember a lot of it and. oohohohoho. god. i was deranged.

thank you again for sending in this ask, jade!! sorry (not sorry) it got so long skjfvnksfjbn

send me the name of a wip off of this list and i'll reply with a snippet and/or my thoughts on it !!

[bratkook]

like you used to. jjk

“So kill me like you used to...”

part two.

pairing. ex boyfriend!jungkook x reader genre. angst, mentions of smut, toxic exes warnings. very toxic depictions of relationships, hints at infidelity, drunken mistakes, they’re both very toxic for each other and just can’t stay away, brief mentions of smut word count. 2.9k note. this is just a lump of angst that my mind conjured at 1am last night, i just love angst and messy relationships that are destined to fail 😌(its not edited so if u see a typo no u dont)

It always started with a phone call. 

Whether it was from you or him always changed. Sometimes he’d get the call at two in the morning, vision blurry as he brought the phone to his face and saw your name illuminated on the screen, that old goofy selfie you had together still set as your contact photo. He’d hesitate for a moment just to keep you on your toes before pressing accept, already getting up and putting pants on because he knew just what you were calling for. 

Tonight was your turn to be on the receiving end, laying in bed comfortably as you scrolled through random posts to try to help you sleep, the flash of his face fills your phone, it’s a random close up photo of his eyes staring right into the camera, crinkled up in a smile. Even though his name is changed in your contacts, no longer having the cute bunny emoji tacked to the end, you know you’ll still pick up in a heartbeat. And you do. 

The second you press accept you’re met with the familiar sound of his voice, slurred and thick as he speaks so jumbled up you would barely be able to understand him if you didn’t already know what he was saying. It was the same things he always said whenever he got like this, proclamations of love that only cut up your freshly scabbed over wounds, salt rubbing into them when he cries about how he misses you, promises to change. 

They get cut off when the phone is yanked away from his grasp, the second familiar voice belonging to his buddy Yugyeom now speaking into the receiver. “You gotta pick him up Y/N.”

The annoyance is evident in his voice, the babbling of Jungkook still heard in the background along with the dull beat of whatever place they were outside of. 

“He’s not my responsibility Yugyeom.”

He simply sighs into the phone, staring at his mess of a friend before rubbing his jaw, sore and aching from where he had just been socked after attempting to force him into an uber. “Yeah well he won’t let anyone else take him home, he’s drunk as fuck. I’ll send you the location.”

Not waiting for a response he hangs up and sends you a pin of where they’re at, thrusting the phone back into his friend’s hands before getting into that uber and leaving Jungkook alone while he whines against the dirty bar wall, crouching down onto the filthy sidewalk as the car drove off. 

Yugyeom knew you would come to his rescue like you always did, never once saying no and letting Jungkook fend for himself because on the rare occasions where you’d call him drunk and crying he’d do the same. 

Getting into the car still dressed in your pajamas, shoes thrown on without being laced up, hair still messy, it felt like routine now from how often it happened. Jungkook called you sober, text you while in a sane state of mind, but without fail at least once a month he’d get absolutely shit faced and call you, leaving you what he thought were heartfelt voicemails if by some chance you didn’t answer. 

It was the same bar every time, a bar you used to frequent with him, knowing the location and all the small side streets to get you there without needing directions. Doing this felt like such a normal part of your life it almost made you forget that you and Jungkook weren’t together anymore. It’s been a year since you split and you still find yourself thinking if things could be different. 

Would it have been best if you never confessed to each other, never admitted to the small inkling of a crush before it was able to fully blossom? It was hard not to wonder how different life would be now if you had walked away the first time things went south, if he had walked away after the first argument. 

Whenever he called you, pulled you in with those drunken promises it was easy to convince yourself that your relationship was perfect, that it was worth all of the struggles. Your brain morphed each fight, each time you cried alone, twisted it around and molded it to make it easier to consume, easier to believe you were meant to be. 

You thought you were soulmates, and maybe you were, two people destined to be together, meeting at the wrong time, under the wrong circumstances. What was meant to be perfect puzzle pieces connected had slowly turned into jagged edges that no longer clicked regardless of how hard you tried to jam them together, foolishly thinking you could spill your love into the gaps to mend the spaces, making the pieces whole once more. 

Love was never enough. 

Love made you stupid, made you blind and gullible, smiling through lies to avoid arguments, going to bed angry until he was hovering over you, coaxing you into forgiveness with soft kisses and gentle touches. It always went this way, regardless of who’s fault it was without fail he’d end up slot between your legs, the only time the puzzle pieces connected perfectly, allowing him to fuck you as if he’d never see you again. Murmurs of love and adoration were passed between panting breaths, sloppy kisses, shared moans to mask the empty promises you made every time.

Staying away from each other was a hard habit to kick, the two of you stuck on an endless game of seesaw, neither of you having the guts to get off and move on. All it took was a simple drunk phone call for you to go his way, the slur of his voice as he cries into the receiver about how much he loved you, missed you, needed you next to him, wanted to try again. It reeled you in so easily, winding you up until you were hauling your sloppy ex boyfriend off the dirty floor and into your small car. 

He remembers none of this, he never did, not fully anyways. Small tidbits of words he said flash in his mind as he comes to, drool on his cheek and neck sore from the unfortunate position he had slept in, groggy and unaware of his surroundings. 

He knew your apartment too well, recognized the green wall he had helped you paint, now holding endless pictures of you and your friends. None of Jungkook anymore. 

All of those photos were gone now, not burned or shredded in some ritual to get over him, simply tucked into a box and shoved so far into your closet you hoped you would forget it. You never did of course, the way the box laid dust free made it clear how often you pulled it out and sorted through the photos whenever you had too much wine, whenever you had off days where you just felt so alone and wished you could go back to the times you had convinced yourself were better. They weren’t, you knew they weren’t once you sobered up and balanced out your emotions.

Jungkook doesn’t feel bothered that not a trace of him remained visible in your home, he knew his presence lingered in the cracks, buried so deep in the crevices of your mind he knew you would always think of him. 

He groans softly as his eyes roam the interior of your home, the throbbing in his temples making him stop and shut his lids, not needing to analyze the place he was at less than two weeks ago when you had called him over. Jungkook briefly wonders if he should sneak his way out, not used to waking up on the couch instead of in your bed right beside you, maybe he had said something last night that crossed the line and landed him on the couch as a punishment. 

As you finally emerge from your room his plan of escape is put to a stop, his eyes gravitating towards your bedroom door, seeing the way you cautiously step out. Having heard Jungkook wake up since you had already been awake for the past hour, your body not allowing you to sleep while knowing he was in the other room, it took a few minutes of courage before you were able to face him. 

Spotting him on your couch shows how much he doesn’t belong, the pinned leather jacket he wore looking so harsh against the light coloring of your furniture, his dark disheveled hair contrasting with the tidy way you organized your apartment. He senses it, the skin crawling sensation that spreads the longer you stare at him, how he felt so out of place somewhere he used to call home at one point. 

“Thank you for picking me up.” He chooses to break the silence, voice raspy, his internal self screaming at him for always doing this. His eyes are sincere, genuinely meaning it, knowing just how messy he got when he had too much to drink, how his friends could never handle him when he crossed the line and began to call for you. 

Like always his words were routine so he expects it when you huff and say, “You need better friends Jungkook.”

“I know.” Because he did, he knew his friends enabled him, riled him up and once he became too much they pushed him onto you, knowing Jungkook’s grip on you was still too strong for you to ever say no. 

“What if I hadn’t picked you up? Would they have left you on the side of the bar to fend for yourself?”

“Probably,” he shrugs, from past experiences he knows very well they would have. His friends had dealt with Jungkook crying over you far too much, their patience fully stamped out, no longer able to tolerate him when he became like this. 

Not even realizing when he begins to smile as he thought of the nights you didn’t pick up, how he had ended up in the most random locations because he refused to go home to a place you weren’t, he snaps out of it when you scoff. “It’s not funny Jungkook, you could have gotten hurt or something.”

There it was, the reason you were upset. Not because he had called you and spewed the same bullshit he always did, no that you could tolerate. You were upset, and worried, that you’d get a following call from someone stating he had injured himself while calling for you. 

“I know.”

You pause to breathe, his short responses not irking you like it should, arms crossed over your chest as you observe your ex boyfriend still sitting on the couch, looking like a scolded child. 

“You can’t call me anymore Jungkook.” How you have the nerve to say that to him is funny, acting as if ten days ago you weren’t the one doing this to him, telling him you missed him, securing your anchor around his foot and dragging him back under with you. 

This is the checklist you needed to go down, a formality of the morning after so he doesn’t mind it. Instead he frowns at the way you continue to say his name, the way it rolls off your tongue makes him wince, missing the way you’d call him Kookie, playful pet names like Bunny, something he swore he hated but secretly loved. Jungkook wished he could hear you say it again, humor you with that damned bunny eared headband he’d wear to hear you laugh, squeal as he posed and dance for whatever silly video you recorded as you shouted out the ridiculous nickname. 

The last time he heard those words spill out of your mouth had been too long ago. 

“I’m sorry.” he admits, he knew he had to stop, couldn’t continue to hold onto the past, knowing how wrong you were for each other but he wasn’t the only one. Those were the same words you told him ten days ago, apologizing with guilty eyes for asking him to come over when you were lonely, needing a familiar body to occupy the space next to you, wanting his hands to soothe you, make you feel whole again just for a night. 

Once the sun came up it was back to normal, the two of you having the repeat conversation you had every time, the exact one you were having now. A formality. Nothing more, just mindless words that you would both agree to just to move along, to make you both feel better, more secure with yourself until the next time the phone rang. 

Your heart twists in your chest as you look at him, the same toxic love you had for him brewing in your heart, spilling over and burning you but you ignore the pain, convince yourself you don’t feel it as you breathe in. That same rope latches around Jungkook’s ankle as you avert your eyes for a brief second before looking back at him with a small sigh. “Do you want breakfast? I know how you get when you have a hangover.”

He smiles for the first time, charming as always, looking up at you through the subtle waves in his hair. “I probably shouldn’t.”

You know this. He definitely shouldn’t because breakfast will turn into words exchanged, civil at first, flirty the next, a coin flipped to decide if a petty argument would begin or if you’d reminisce about the good times. Regardless of the outcome, what always followed ended with you moaning out his name as he rocked into you, those same empty promises spilling through his lips that you swallowed with a kiss. 

A brief moment of bliss, a small dose of the past that only serves to hurt you further but you crave it, loving the small rush that came with arguing, the roughness of his hands as he pushed you around before sliding home, burying his face into your neck as he broke you down all over again. 

Normally you’d try to convince him further, but as your mouth opens to protest you get flashes of the night before, how you had carried Jungkook up your flight of stairs, hearing him ramble about nonsense so slurred together you paid it no mind. You would have had him sleep in your bed beside you like you always did but when you fish his phone out and begin to slide his jacket off it buzzes to life. 

Always being nosey you type in his password, smiling when you realize it was still your old anniversary but when you unlock it and see a flood of messages from a girl named Natalie, calling him babe, asking where he was, the smile falls from your face as you start to snoop. 

It doesn’t take much scrolling through their thread of messages to easily discover she was his girlfriend, blissfully unaware that he was shit faced and calling you, confessing to his love for you while she laid at home and wondered if he was having fun with his friends. She reminded you of yourself, of the way you used to be with him and it left a sour feeling on your tongue. 

“Yeah you probably shouldn’t.” 

He stands up now, following you slowly as you approach the door, heavy boots thumping on the hardwood as he reluctantly steps closer to the exit. He doesn’t want to leave, wants you to try to convince him to stay, not knowing that you knew the dirty secret he was hiding buried in his phone. 

You don’t decide to tell him you know, it was pointless. That was just how Jungkook was wired, so much love to give he had to spread it out, give everyone a fair share of it, choosing to pretend he wasn’t being selfish. It was naive to believe it, to think all the love he held was strictly for you, it was why he was able to pull the hood over your eyes so easily. 

Even when you pull the door open and give him a tightlipped smile he knows you’ll still call him, forget all about Natalie when you’re lonely once more. So when you look him in the eyes and sigh, “Goodbye Jungkook.” He knows it’s not for long, maybe a week or so, maybe less. 

He simply smiles, stuffing his hands into his jeans as he shuffles out, turning to face you as he steps backwards. “See you later Y/N.” And his words sting in a way he doesn’t mean, knowing just how right he was. 

Jungkook would never mind how heavy the anchor you hooked on his ankle was because he knew you would forever be a sucker for him. 

As you shut the door behind you it feels like a small weight starts to hang from your shoulders, the same tug starting from your chest, guiding you into your room until you’re pulling out the cursed box and sorting through those damned photos. With stinging eyes you flip through them for a moment, focusing on all the laughs captured on film, blurry vision moving to your phone beside you, hands already itching to call him again. 

It’s as if he knows, still inside your building, lingering in the lobby to give you a moment and it doesn’t take long. Once his phone starts to vibrate he smiles, staring at the photo of you as you call him like clockwork. With a clear of his throat he answers the phone, barely saying hello before he hears a small sniffle through the speaker. 

“I miss you Kookie.” 

Jungkook lets his eyes shut as he presses the elevator button, loving the feeling of being needed by you, already knowing to head back up because this was routine. 

“I know you do baby, I’ll be right up.”

And just like that you’re once again desperately trying to make those stupid puzzle pieces fit together, hoping that maybe this time love would be enough.

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

not allowed iv, m | jjk, myg

pairing(s): est. poly relationship – jungkook x reader x yoongi

summary: Your boyfriends woke up and chose violence. Excuse me, Jeon Jungkook, Min Yoongi? Do you really think you can post one after another on Twitter, send the world into heart palpitations, and not expect your girlfriend to do something about it? Hmm?!

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; mentions of the pandemic; reader and Yoongi have giant heart eyes whenever they see each other; feels and fluff; smut (fem reader, dirty talk, nipple play, f and m-receiving oral, fingering, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, m-masturbation, double penetration/spit roasting); idol!BTS

that’s right JK posted his blue hair and i absolutely lost it part of ‘not allowed’ series, but can be read alone. basic summary: your boyfriend asked JJK to fuck you, then again, and then they decided to make this a thing; based on real time.

--

Your boyfriends woke up today and chose violence.

Everything was fine. You were on your lunch break, sitting in your kitchen, knowing you would have to get back to work soon. A quick meal and scrub of the dishes left you with you a few minutes to check your phone. You didn’t get many messages throughout the day and you preferred it that way. You took a moment to scroll through social media.

Only to choke a little seeing Jeon Jungkook, the Golden Maknae of BTS, reveal his dark blue locks to the world in the middle of the damn day. Did you almost drop your phone? Yes. Did you not because it was the special edition BTS S20+? Also, yes. The TinyTan SUGA phone case would have protected it anyway, but… still.

You placed your phone aside and went back to your computer, ready to attend work again.

Not quite composed, but it was just a picture, just a picture, just a picture…

Except you knew what Jungkook looked like naked and that wasn’t helping.

Three hours later, you snuck a glance at your phone only to be attacked by the cutest human being in the world, Min Yoongi, SUGA of BTS, sometimes Agust D, all the time lil meow meow because, holy shit, why the fuck was this man so cute? Those damn cheeks. Those eyes. Fuck, you loved his eye shape. And his pretty lips. Damnnit, why couldn’t you kiss him right now?

They’re trying to kill you and ARMY all at once. 

You’re convinced.

You rubbed your temples and took a deep breath.

It is only a coincidence. It doesn’t involve you. They’re only being their usual adorable, attractive selves and giving a gift to the fans. You weren’t delusional. It was their job to do things like this. You knew this and you were used to it. You’ve seen Yoongi say all kinds of things in V-LIVEs and you always thought it was funny. Lately, he hadn’t been responding to them much though. As for Jungkook, well.

Everyone in the world wanted Jungkook, including you, so could you blame the world? No.

Jungkook tried to tell you before that he was shy and you recalled all those see-through shirts he’d worn on stage. All those ab reveals. Hmm, you weren’t fooled.

“I wanted to make sure you were looking at me, noona,” Jungkook had teased you, hooking his arms around your waist. “I had to get your attention somehow.”

Yeah, yeah, your attention and millions of other people.

It made you laugh, until he became your boyfriend, and now it made you choke on air like every other human being who saw him looking that good. Before you had the safety of giving your full attention to Yoongi. Yoongi had always been your priority and you wanted to make sure he felt that way.

Little by little.

Jungkook grew up.

And became harder and harder to ignore.

Even more difficult when Yoongi gave him the apartment key and told him to fuck you in his stead.

You heard your phone ping. You checked your messages, saving your work in the process.

That will teach you to post such sexy pictures.

You twitched. Excuse me? What was Jungkook talking about? Your personal, private Instagram was for expressing your – sometimes eccentric – fashion sense. Was he referring to the images you posted for Valentine’s Day, the ones with the white vinyl coat, red stockings, and sky-high red heels? Hmph. You couldn’t even see your face in those. Actually, you deliberately cut off most of your face in all of your pictures. The most you showed were your lips, always painted to match your outfit. You didn’t want anyone to recognize you, even by happenstance.

Made taking pictures much easier, since you never had to do eye makeup or worry about accidentally making ugly faces.

It was private now, but it wasn’t before, and the only reason you privated it was because you started dating Yoongi. You still wanted it use it as an outlet though, so you left it as is, with your follower count unchanging. It wasn’t that many people to begin with and you were pretty sure a lot of the accounts were bots.

In any case, sometimes you felt like being creative and dressing up, thus you did so on Instagram. You couldn’t dress like that when you went to visit Yoongi. Ah, and now Jungkook too. To be honest, you loved fashion and trying on different looks, but it wasn’t possible unless you were alone. And you were alone a lot, with no one but strangers to appreciate (or be confused by) it.

Might as well take a picture, right?

And if you could tease Yoongi a little, at least from a distance, that was even better.

You forgot Jungkook also followed you now though. 

Dammit. 

Had the photos been sexy? Sure. Provocative, lots of leg, almost a peek of ass but not quite. Red lips to stand out against the white. If the coat was black, it would have been more traditionally fetishist, but that's why you had picked shiny white vinyl. Brighter for the cute holiday. 

Who are you kidding? You wore it to provoke Yoongi.

He texted you after you posted it. Usually, he said things along the lines of, pretty, cute, you look crazy, I like it. Only sometimes did he say...

what the fuck

You had asked him if he liked your post today. 

I'm not trying to pop a boner in the middle of practice, control yourself woman.

Maybe don't post such cute selfies then, you had thought. Then your phone pinged again. 

Send a picture with the coat open. Jungkook wants to see. 

Oh, so now that the maknae was involved, he was going to pin things on the younger one. Two can play at this game. You sent the photo to Jungkook first. You knew that if the situation was reversed, Yoongi would have done the same. Jungkook's reaction had been hilarious.

Noona?! WHAT???

And then a slew of head exploding emojis.

Yoongi had been agitated until you finally sent him the picture too. It had been a fun incident.

Until your boyfriends woke up today and chose violence.

Dammit. 

You stared at blue-haired Jungkook and 'Blue and Grey' Yoongi from the MTV Unplugged performance. 

This just wasn’t allowed. 

-

This visit had a purpose, but then you saw Min Yoongi standing in the hallway waiting for you, wearing an olive-green shirt, hands in the pockets of his black sweatpants, small smile on his lips. Purring your name lovingly after you closed the door, and you realized you missed him so very much, his lovely dark brown eyes and dark hair, and then you were suddenly in his arms and he was hugging you. 

With both arms. 

Yoongi was recovering well and he still couldn't do strenuous activity yet, but he was hugging you with both arms and you wanted to cry because it was so nice to have them both around you. You could've been cool and collected, yet somehow both you and Yoongi had the same idea to first hug and breathe in each other, his fresh, woodsy scent strongly invading your nose and his soft cheek against yours.

"You smell different."

"Do you like it?" you mumbled into his neck, kissing it lightly. 

"Mhm."

You thought it had worn off by now, but the new perfume you had purchased lingered far longer than you imagined, clinging to your hair. Warm spiced sweetness with a hint of sharp smoke. Yoongi inhaled deeply beside you.

"You should wear more perfume," he murmured, hands kneading your waist.

"Someone might notice."

"Nah, your taste similar enough to mine."

He was taking off your coat and you were stepping out of your shoes, being pulled deeper into the apartment, and now his kisses were yours, soft and light, every one saying, I missed you, I want you, I love you. There no need for words when it was Min Yoongi. Fingers tapping down your waist, pulling your oversized black shirt up and over your head. 

"Excuse me?"

You pooped your head out to see Yoongi staring at your chest, jaw dropped and eyes wide. Oh, right. You had been so occupied with hugs and kisses that you almost forgot. Your shirt fluttered to the floor, forgotten.

You smirked. 

"Surprise."

Yoongi made a face at you. Somewhere between angry, aroused, and shock. Good. Serves you right for posting such a cute selfie.

The front door opened. 

Both of you instantly moved, you sliding behind him and into the bedroom, Yoongi standing in front of you, masking your frame. The discarded shirt and jacket could be explained away – that's why you wore oversized men's clothes, usually in Yoongi's preferred color palette.

"Hyung?"

Oh, whew. Actually, wait. No, this was danger. 

"Ah, Jungkookie."

Yoongi placed his hand on your arm and you popped your head over the corner once you heard the door close. Yup. A swift shake of dark blue locks, white sweatshirt and loose black sweatpants, and that mischievous smirk with a wrinkle of his nose. 

Danger.

"Hey, noona!"

Damnnit, planning for two is hard! You couldn't just go put your shirt on and do the grand reveal again. Yoongi grasped your upper arm with his right hand and yanked you from the doorframe. You squeaked, body stumbling into Jungkook’s view.

"Did you plan this?" Yoongi asked with a cocked brow. 

Jungkook's eyes went wide. 

"Uh... no, but I like where this is going," Jungkook replied, smirk growing. 

The black lace bra stood out against your skin, strappy and elegant, molding to the swells of your breasts and the curve downward to your waist, matching the garter belt that disappeared into the black jeans you were wearing. You didn't usually wear lingerie. It wasn't practical and if you accidentally left something behind... it wasn't worth the risk. Yoongi and you took every precaution to not fuck this up. 

Therefore, you only wore lingerie on your private Instagram. 

Only showing little flashes, never the whole picture. And, really, you wore it in your photos to mess with them. It made you feel nice too, so it was a win-win. This set was familiar to Yoongi and Jungkook because you had worn the red version in the original Valentine’s Day themed photos. 

Again, you didn't usually wear lingerie, but Jungkook and Yoongi couldn't just post pictures on Twitter back-to-back, two-shot you, and not expect a damn reaction. That kind of shit wasn't tolerated! On top of all that, you had to wait and get properly tested before getting here. This pandemic extended your frustrations. So, yes, fuck it, you wore the damn lingerie that made you feel the sexiest. Even if your jeans were still on, you knew you looked good. 

No one had to tell you. You checked in the mirror before you left. 

"Is this your response to my text a couple days ago?" Jungkook teased, kicking off his shoes and bounding over to you two. His dark blue hair shimmered in the light, like a night sky covered with stars, smile pure and naughty at the same time, lighting up his whole face. 

Fuck you for being hot, Jeon Jungkook!

You leaned back against Yoongi, crossing your arms under your breasts, pressing them together. Jungkook grinned, the mole underneath his lower lip winking at you. 

"Something like that," you coolly replied. Shit, there was an edge to your voice. Hopefully neither Yoongi or Jungkook picked that up.

"Hmm..." 

Jungkook pursed his lips, the tip of his pink tongue sticking out the side. Ack. You had to look away. You turned and bumped your lace-covered tits against Yoongi's chest. His dark brown orbs flickered to your breasts, sly smile on his lips. 

"This is your fault too, by the way."

Yoongi raised his eyebrows, amused. "What do you mean?"

You dropped your hands, surveying him suspiciously. "You think I don't know? Posting right after Jungkook? That's not allowed! You know what that does to me."

Yoongi leaned forward. Your breath caught in your throat, heart beating fast all of a sudden. You backed up, right into Jungkook's chest. Uh oh. Yoongi hummed, black hair shadowing his face, devious sparkle in those dangerous eyes, his voice a raspy, purring drawl. 

"What does it do to you?"

Your hand fell back to brace yourself and Jungkook's fingers wrapped around your wrist, stroking your skin. You felt him shift behind you and then his lips were on your ear, whispering in his silvery voice. 

"Yeah, noona. Tell us.” His grip on your wrist tightened, squeezing lightly, asserting his presence behind you. “Or you can show us."

...

!!!

How dare they tag team you? First, they visually attack you – and millions of other ARMY – in the middle of the workday, and now this, Yoongi closing in, kissing you once more, deeper, hungrier, with dark intent, smirking against your lips as Jungkook took both your hands, ghosting his long fingers over yours. You whimpered into Yoongi's mouth, body tensing, Jungkook pressing himself into your back, breath against your hair. 

"You smell different," he murmured.

You couldn't reply. Yoongi was sucking on your tongue, making you whine. 

"Warm, sweet, and spicy."

Yoongi released you and you gasped for air, bucking into Jungkook's crotch. "I bought it last week... thought it smelled nice..."

Jungkook nuzzled your hair. "I like it. Makes me horny."

You laughed a little, turning your hands around in his to lace your fingers together. He held your hands firmly, grinding his crotch into your ass. You could already feel his arousal through your jeans.

"Sounds dangerous," you mused. 

"It is," Yoongi chuckled. "But you should keep wearing it anyway. You smell good."

Heat rose to your cheeks. Then you realized your jeans were already undone, being daintily pushed down by deft hands and an amused expression, Yoongi crouching to pull them along. Bit by bit, revealing the matching garter belt, the high-cut black lace panties that framed your thighs, and lace-topped sheer stockings, all the straps emphasizing your softness, sinking into your thighs and ass.

"Fuck..." Yoongi breathed, running his fingertips over the delicate fabric, touch so light against your skin, dancing up your knee. "You're so fucking beautiful."

He looked up at you, eyes so dark they seemed black, playful smirk on those perfect pink lips. Thump. You felt Jungkook pull your arms back and press them to his sides. You grabbed fistfuls of Jungkook’s shirt, staring down at Yoongi advancing between your legs, his smirk growing wider and more teasing, lovely voice low and husky, deep with arousal.

"What's the matter?" Yoongi purred. "Cat got your tongue?"

Your body tensed in anticipation, Jungkook's hands crawling around your sides, one tattooed, one not, fingers hovering over your now trembling chest. Looking down at Yoongi's smug expression, tongue flicking out and teasing you. Reminding you how good he was and how long you'd been waiting. 

Fuck you for being hot, Min Yoongi!

"Don't overexert yourself..." you breathed.

A sculpted brow lifted. 

"I have help now," he reminded you and Jungkook's hands sank into your barely-covered breasts. 

"Fuck..." Jungkook hissed into your ear, running his palms over your nipples, listening to your gasps as Yoongi dived between your thighs, hot tongue sliding against the lace. "Missed these tits so fucking much." His lips on your ear, growling your name, that dominant edge to his silvery voice, tweaking the hardened nubs while Yoongi teased your clothed clit with his tongue, the lace hardly a barrier but still an effective one, the rough threads plucking against your sensitive nerves.

How long had it been? So long, almost forever since Yoongi’s tongue was on you, soft and fast and the perfect pressure, deliberately teasing you and not moving the fabric aside, so close yet so far. If it wasn’t Yoongi, maybe you could tell him to move it, maybe you could beg, but you couldn’t speak because of Yoongi’s tongue and Jungkook’s rough touch, his hands on your breasts, pushing them together, your nipples poking tiny tents in the black lace, running his fingertips over them over and over, his hips grinding into your ass. Yoongi cupped one of your ass cheeks and spread them, your panties bunching in the center, Jungkook’s hardness slipping in, still covered by his sweatpants.

Wetter, hotter, sanity slipping little by little.

“Y-Yoongi… J-Jungkook…”

You tried not to shove your hips in Yoongi’s face, not wanting to strain his neck, and ended up pushing back instead, bouncing against Jungkook’s cock. The younger man snickered, nipping at your ear, pinching your nipples, and you felt a slick squelch as Yoongi’s tongue pushed the lace into your dripping pussy. The moans dragged out of your throat, eyelids fluttering, letting them do whatever they wanted, pleasure flooding all your senses, watching Yoongi wreck you, clutching Jungkook’s sweatshirt, panting their names, leaking more and more, the scent of your juices getting stronger and sweeter.

“This isn’t fair…” you panted. “I’m going c-crazy…”

Yoongi hummed on your clit and you cried out, hips rocking, so good, head tipping onto Jungkook’s broad shoulder, his long blue hair brushing against your cheek and eyelashes.

“Good, because you make us crazy,” Jungkook muttered, pushing your breasts together and squeezing them roughly. His voice was so deep you could feel your back vibrate with his words. His other hand came up and gripped your chin, trailing down and fitting around your neck, the loose sleeve falling and revealing his forearm tattoos, contrasting your lace-covered skin. “Always looking so fucking pretty and making me want to fuck you…”

His index finger came up and pressed against your lower lip. Those chocolatey eyes were watching your face from his peripheral vision, smirking as he witnessed your expression.

“Even showing off these sexy, fuckable lips. That’s not fair either, noona.”

“T-That’s not…”

Jungkook’s hand at your throat dropped and you yelped, his large palm fitting around your right thigh and lifting it up, fingers sinking in. Stockings, lace, garter, Jungkook’s touch, holding your leg up and out, giving Yoongi a perfect view of your glistening core. Then there was more, too much more, Yoongi pushing aside your panties, soaked fabric snapping against the inside of your thigh and then his mouth was directly on you, oh, fuck, his tongue on your throbbing clit, lips wrapped around it, pure suffocating ecstasy, your slick juices dripping down his chin, so easy, it was just too easy for Yoongi to make you feel so fucking good and he looked so sexy doing it too, those cat-like eyes piercing into you, ordering you to cum for him, to spill all over his beautiful face.

“Yoongi… fuck, your tongue is so fucking good–”

Your body rippled with pleasure and you flung your head to the side, away from Jungkook’s ear to moan far too loud, filling up the entire hallway, wanton and lewd, absolutely pornographic and sinful in nature, orgasm gushing into Yoongi’s waiting mouth, shuddering against Jungkook’s hard body. So many sensations, too many sensations. Yoongi sank his nails into your ass, growling as he sucked out your cum and drank it, Jungkook grinding his stiff length in between your ass cheeks, spreading your leg so far that your left one was quivering with strain, tits squashed in Jungkook’s left hand, his warm tongue on your ear, whispering darkly. Dirty, sensual, and your pussy couldn’t stop throbbing, Min Yoongi’s mouth and Jeon Jungkook’s low octave driving you insane.

“You look so fucking good, noona. Your body is so fucking perfect, so sexy wrapped up in lace,” he exhaled, sliding his palm over your nipples roughly, earning more depraved moans. He lowered your leg, slowly, Yoongi lapping at your clit, sending shocks of pleasure up your torso as he cleaned you off. Jungkook’s hand slid down over your stomach, flicking the straps against your skin, small snaps of pain that made you gasp, trapped in Jungkook’s power, letting him take over you. He took a step back, forcing you to arch your spine and look up at him, a curtain of cobalt surrounding that handsome face and those intense brown eyes.

No one could make you feel the way Yoongi made you feel. No one.

So...

Why did staring up at Jungkook like this do things to you? Why did it put your heart on a string and tension in your throat? Get it together. You weren't a teenager. Ask for what you want. He was just so insanely attractive in every way.

Jungkook smirked and you wanted him to ruin you. 

He lifted you up easily. You saw Yoongi standing up and wiping his chin, self-satisfied and amused. He tilted his head and plucked one of the straps on your stomach, a light, erotic sting. Yoongi made eye contact with you, locking you in his gaze. A single look, and your heart was fluttering, immediately smitten. One by one, fingers wrapping around a few of the straps and pulling you to him, backing up, leading you to the bed by own your lingerie. 

"Why today?" Yoongi drawled, tracing the curve of the bra cup, sending shivers over your skin. "Feeling risky?"

You raised a brow, focusing on him, trapped in those cat-like eyes. 

"Control yourself. Aren't you used to this body by now?"

Yoongi grinned devilishly, darting closer, leaving you breathless in his speed. The scent of his cologne and your orgasm lingered on his skin, a delicious combination. 

"Never."

Kissing you, taking your startled inhale, and you could taste yourself, fuck, just something about his skilled lips and your taste had your fingers twisting into Yoongi's shirt, rolling your body into his, still being so careful, but it was so hard because he was making it so hard, teasing you with that deft tongue, bursts of pleasure with every heartbeat you had while captured in Yoongi's lips. You missed it, this intensity, the overwhelming feeling that Yoongi gave you, being able to give in to the want, but you still couldn't give in without abandon, but you were so close. 

So close. 

Ruin me. 

He pushed you lightly and you felt another pair of arms wrap around you, the kiss suddenly broken, but the second touch was familiar now, one tattooed arm, one not, and you knew that if you fell, these arms could catch you.

Jungkook put you in his lap, your back touching his bare chest. Oh, shit. Before you could think much about it, he turned you so you were laying in his arms princess-style. He must have removed his sweatshirt while you were talking to Yoongi, but he still wearing his pants, now sitting in the side of the bed, blue hair messy from your hands and the removal of his clothes. Your arms hooked around his neck instinctively, not wanting to fall, but he had his right hand splayed across your shoulder blades, holding you up securely. 

"Mmm, this is nice," Jungkook murmured, playfully smiling. He nuzzled your nose, tongue flicking over your lips. "Why did you make us wait so long, hm?"

You frowned, breath against his chin. "The number of cases got higher... and you all were so busy... I couldn't get tested until recently."

Jungkook made a disgruntled noise. 

"Hey, public health and safety is important."

He pouted at you. "But..."

"He's horny and wants to fuck," Yoongi cut in.

"Hyung…!"

Yoongi pulled up his chair and sat down, looking amused. 

"He's been jacking off to your pictures."

"N-no, I haven't!"

"Really? I have."

Yoongi's face was completely neutral. It was hard to tell if he was lying or not. 

Jungkook tried to hide his flushed face with your hair. "... M-Maybe I h-have..."

"Tsk, tsk, naughty Jungkookie," you teased.

"Noona..."

"And you?"

You felt Yoongi grasp your chin, tipping you back in Jungkook's arms. Some of your hair fell over your eyes, hazing your vision of Yoongi. Even so, his intent was obvious. You could feel it in his gaze, the burning hunger, his fingertips caressing your chin, leaning forward slightly to observe you. 

I want to ruin you. 

Yoongi didn't have to say it. You knew it, pierced by the predatory glint in his eyes. You could tell he missed this, could tell that he wanted to give in to his desires, wanted to lose control, only limited by his own physical body.

However. 

He pressed his thumb into your lower lip, lifting a brow. 

Jungkook was here now.

Yoongi gave you his trademark open-mouthed smirk. 

"Ruin me," you whispered, staring into those cat-like dark brown eyes. The recognition was instant, pleased that you knew what he wanted. You shifted your attention to the maknae, his chocolate eyes wide, watching your tongue slide out and licking Yoongi's thumb. "Ruin me, Jungkook."

You loved the way Jungkook could turn from blushing anxiousness to sly confidence, and all it took was your words and the way you said them, enabling him in the best way possible. The dark blue hair helped accented the shift in demeanor, creating cool-toned shadows over his lightly tanned skin. 

"Anything for you," Jungkook purred.

You gasped sharply as you felt two fingers slide into you, Jungkook’s thumb rubbing your overstimulated clit. Your body jerked, trying to get away, but Yoongi's hand on your chin slid down, pressing on your chest, holding you still, your name a dangerous rasp from Yoongi's lips.

"Stay still."

Your eyes flickered down. Right hand. Okay. You shouldn’t be worried anymore, but you were. It was habit.

"Yoon–ah!"

You gasped, left arm firmly behind Jungkook's shoulders and the other behind you, your hand on the bed to steady your balance as Yoongi shoved the bra cups down, exposing your breasts. He lowered his head, the contact of his lips on your hot skin paired with Jungkook's thrust of his fingers into your pussy. Instant waves of pleasure overtook you, fingers sinking into the sheets and Jungkook’s hair, fuck, his beautiful navy hair standing out against your skin and, for some reason, seeing that made you feel prettier, thrusting your chest in Yoongi’s face to get more into his mouth, spreading your legs wide to give Jungkook more access.

Only a brief moment of, I should know better, I shouldn’t be doing this, and then Yoongi’s eyes were on you, tongue flicking your red nipple.

Let go.

Was this even fair to them? Could you satisfy both? Could you and should you? But Yoongi’s eyes were telling you to let go, to chase the feeling, to give in, and hunt the desperation and the want. They wanted you. There was nothing like this and there will never be anything like this again.

“Give it to me,” Yoongi growled.

You whined sharply as you felt two more fingers push into you, but not Jungkook’s fingers, Yoongi’s fingers, his thumb joining Jungkook’s on your clit and your eyes rolled back, so wet and aroused from knowing both Jungkook’s and Yoongi’s fingers were thrusting into you, four in total, your pussy sucking them in, back arching as Yoongi sucked on your nipple. So much pleasure, rapidly ascending higher and higher, so fucking full and tight that their fingers were making sloppy smacking sounds, matching rhythm so they filled you completely together, all at once.

You couldn’t stop your hips from meeting them, fingers spreading out in Jungkook’s hair and the sheets as you came hard, gasping their names, euphoria soaring through your nerves, and still they didn’t stop even though your pussy was violently spasming, creating a messy splatter of your juices on the inside of your thighs and their hands. Instead, the pace changed, Yoongi switching sides on your chest, and then you really couldn’t think, because Jungkook was lowering his head too, and now both of your nipples were getting abused, Jungkook’s arm firmly under your upper back to hold you up, not letting you fall.

“Yoongi, Jungkook… p-please, oh fuck!”

Your other hand flew up and buried in Yoongi’s dark locks, both hands in their hair now, one blue, one black, another orgasm crashing down, moan torn from your chest. And they kept going, changing the pace again, your toes and fingers curling, every muscle tense with irresistible, consuming ecstasy that you almost felt a little numb, unable to compute anything else but your body scantily covered in lace, two mouths sucking on your nipples, four fingers stuffed into you, clit engorged and sending violent shocks throughout your system. You couldn’t even discern one orgasm from another, pussy continuously throbbing and convulsing with the continuous, chained orgasms, so wet that it was soaking the tops of your stockings, the sweet honey of your cum the predominant scent in the room.

“I… I-I can’t take a-anymore, please…”

Your legs threatened to close but Yoongi snapped his head up, snarling your name dangerously.

“One more,” he ordered. “Give us one more.”

“Your pussy feels so good,” Jungkook panted, saliva dripping down your chest. “I love it so fucking much, even when it’s around my fingers.”

You were trying to hold back, trying to control it, tensing everything, your core, your legs, your arms, and you didn’t even realize it, but you held your breath too, biting your lip and seeing Yoongi and Jungkook at the same time, both watching you, fingers punishingly squelching into your tight little hole, stretching it out unforgivingly, abused clit pulsating so hard it almost hurt, and it was exactly what you wanted, brimming, boiling pleasure that threatened you on the brink, closer, closer, closer, and the world was almost hazy with how ferociously you had constricted the coil.

“Fuck!”

You threw your head back, back abruptly arching and smacking them in the face with your tits as everything came plummeting down, resolve cracking with a wanton howl, orgasm racking through your entire frame so hard that your body lurched and flinched, Yoongi and Jungkook cradling you while you rode your high, grinding your hips into their hands and carnally moaning, liquid gushing out and dripping down your legs, your ass, down Jungkook’s sweatpants and onto the bed.

It was such an intense orgasm that you were lightheaded, hands slipping out of their hair and falling down, drained, aftershocks causing your body to shudder, even as they removed their fingers. Your clit was still throbbing, pumps of pleasure spreading through you.

It was obscene witnessing Yoongi and Jungkook cleaning their fingers off right in front of you, pink tongues sliding between the digits, licking off your viscous cum, giving you a perverse sense of satisfaction when Yoongi moaned softly and Jungkook groaned lowly, savoring your taste like a fine wine. Yoongi spied your exhausted, smug expression.

“Do you think you’re done?”

You gave him a weak smirk. “I better not be.”

“Sit in Jungkook’s lap,” Yoongi said calmly. “Face me.”

You tilted your head curiously but did as you were told, shifting your still quivering legs so your thighs were on the outside of Jungkook’s thighs, the balance a little difficult, but Yoongi took your hands and placed them around his hips. You held onto him as he lifted his shirt, pulling it over his head.

“Jungkook, rip her panties off.”

Wait, what did Min Yoongi just s–?

Two strong hands dug out the lace trapped in your ass and fastened around the thin fabric.

Riiiiiiip!

“Yoongi!”

The shirt fluffed his black hair as he removed it, dropping it onto his chair. You glared at him as Yoongi looked down at you, expression blank, dark brown orbs full of mischief.

“You knew it was going to happen. If he wasn’t going to rip it, I was.” Yoongi placed his right hand on his left shoulder. His tone dropped, mockingly rueful. “You wouldn’t want me to hurt myself, right?”

Yeah, this was why you didn’t wear lingerie.

But, also, this was why you wore it today.

You felt Jungkook tugging off the now useless pair of panties, plucking them out from under your garter belt. Oh well. You liked the red more anyway. That’s why you had bought two sets, after all.

“Remind me to take all the bits before I go,” you grumbled.

“Sure, noona.” Jungkook dangled the said lacy bits next to your head. You narrowed your eyes and mouth into slits even though he couldn’t see. “I’ll put them in my pocket.” You felt him shove them into his sweatpants.

Were you… going to remember?

Yoongi beckoned you. You shot him a warning look, still annoyed, but Yoongi pointed down to your hands on his hips.

“Isn’t there something you want?” Yoongi mused in that raspy, dark tone, the one that made your irritation fade instantly and replace it with arousal. “Take it.”

He cocked his head, shading his dark eyes with his hair, pink lips parting, the slightest hint of a smirk. Challenging you. Go on. Show me how much you want me. Your body still buzzed with the aftermath of moments before and yet you still lowered your head, sliding your hips back, sucking in a breath as your puffy pussy lips touched Jungkook’s toned chest, smearing yourself on his skin.

“Ooh, I like this,” Jungkook murmured, leaning back a little to give you space. You rocked your hips into his torso, his muscles flexing under you opening, inflamed clit brushing against his hardness. You pushed Yoongi’s pants and underwear down, dipping your head, hearing Yoongi breathe your name lustfully.

“That’s a pretty picture.”

He was only semi-hard, but he was getting harder and harder, watching you grind against Jungkook’s pecs. You knew exactly how to get him the hardest, dipping down and latching your mouth around one of his balls.

“Fuck, yes,” Yoongi gasped, his hand coming up and fitting behind your head. You sucked it into your mouth and then extended your tongue, bouncing the other with your wet muscle while sucking the first one. The first time you did this, Yoongi was literally speechless, sputtering and confused at how you could stimulate both at once and in two different ways, sucking with your lips as your tongue flicked against the other, slurping slightly to add vibration over the sensitive skin. You felt his cock swell, smacking your cheek, fully hard at the combined sensations.

“I still don’t know how you do that,” Yoongi gritted out, keeping your hair away from your face.

“Do what?” Jungkook asked behind you, one hand on your ass and squeezing it.

“She can suck one of your balls and lick the other at the same time.”

“What?!”

You yelped at the sharp sting of Jungkook’s slap to your ass.

“How come you never did that for me?” Jungkook complained, whining a little.

You tried to lift your head, but Yoongi’s hand refused to move. You make a muffled noise of distaste, but Yoongi answered for you as you switched sides.

“Have you asked?” Yoongi replied calmly, sighing in satisfaction.

“How am I supposed to know she has porn star skills?”

“Is this a discussion for right now?” you mumbled into Yoongi’s balls.

“No, because you’re supposed to be swallowing.”

“Wha–”

The second your mouth opened, Yoongi nudged his cock between your lips and you wrapped them around it, moaning as his stiff length slid down your throat, so satisfying, his taste on your tongue, so delicious that you didn’t even want to complain, you only wanted to bob your head up and down, hands on his hips. Yoongi chuckled above you, guiding your head with his right hand, left loosely by his side. You slid your lower body up and down Jungkook’s chest, your increased slickness adding more stimulation.

“Fuck, that’s so damn hot,” you heard Jungkook groan. There was a rustle of fabric and then skin on skin, his muscular arm brushing against your stocking clad thigh with every stroke.

If only you could take a picture and could see how sexy you were, blowing Yoongi with his hand behind your head, tucking the head of his cock into your throat a little deeper every time you descended, your pussy sliding up and down Jungkook’s chest, and Jungkook furiously jacking himself off while watching you suck his hyung off, feeling your slippery clit throb against his skin.

Good thing the door was locked, because of any other member walked in on this, it might have become a damn foursome.

“Close,” Yoongi panted, fingers digging into your scalp. “You want it like this?”

You hummed approvingly in your chest, increasing your pace and fucking Jungkook’s torso harder, nearing your end too, Jungkook moaning louder and pumping himself harder. So many indecent sounds, skin on skin, mouth on skin, hand on skin, moaning, crying out around Yoongi’s cock, his saliva-covered balls smacking you in the chin, you ass slapping down on Jungkook’s chest.

Hot, wet, positively sinful.

The chain reaction started with Jungkook. He came suddenly, choking on your name, shooting up your chest, warm stickiness splattering onto your skin and you squeezed your eyes shut, moaning as you came all over his chest, slippery and sweet, drenching his skin, throat muscles tightening, Yoongi whimpering your name, a rare moment of lost control as he thrust his hips into your lips, coating your throat with thick hot strings, forcing you to swallow fast, the pressure satisfying and overwhelming, gulping it all down eagerly.

You did ask to be ruined.

Just… a little more.

Your eyes were still closed, lazily licking Yoongi’s twitching length. He was panting above you, gently stroking your hair, words so soft that they were almost inaudible.

“I love you…”

You went all the way down and Yoongi groaned, your tongue flicking the top of his balls, rapid, swift laps that made his cock swell again, bending against the roof of your mouth. Yoongi chuckled, knowing exactly what you were doing.

“Still want more?”

You backed up, panting hard, Jungkook’s cum clinging to your chest and lingerie, hair a mess from Yoongi’s hand.

“Want your cock in my pussy,” you demanded hoarsely. “Want you to fuck me, Yoongi.”

He pretended to think about it. “Hmm, I don’t know…”

You got off Jungkook’s lap, snaking around the younger man’s body, crawling onto the bed, eyes on Yoongi, his intense gaze following you, enticed by your movement. On all fours, hips in the air, dropping your chest down a little, the curve of your back accentuating the roundness of your bare ass. Still in your garter belt and stockings, your bra half-off, the lowered cups pushing your breasts together invitingly. Jungkook turned his head, pink lips parting as your fingers fanned out over the sheets, one eyebrow arching gracefully.

“Jungkook in front. Yoongi behind.”

“Do… Do you want a towel or something, noona?” Jungkook asked, blinking rapidly at your assertiveness.

“I want to get fucked and I want to get fucked now, so get over here.”

“Bed’s going to be a mess,” Yoongi remarked, moving quickly, shedding his pants and going for the nightstand, taking out a condom.

“We can sleep in Jungkook’s room,” was your dry reply, yanking Jungkook’s hips towards you after he removed his sweatpants.

“Wha– ack!”

You spread his legs out in front of you, eyes roaming over his naked body, admiring it all, his legs, his abs, his pecs, covered in your drying juices, his adorable surprised face, navy curls around his chiseled cheeks, chocolate eyes round and awed at your prowess. Your hands were on his knees, breasts hanging down, breathing hard, adrenaline humming in your veins.

“You are so fucking pretty it’s unreal,” Jungkook breathed.

You grinned.

“I can’t wait for you to fuck my face.”

Jungkook grinned back at you.

You dove down, tits bouncing before becoming squashed against the bed, Jungkook’s drying cum flaking off as you wrapped your lips around one of his balls, moaning as you felt Yoongi’s hands firmly grip your hips.

“You have to help me a little,” Yoongi murmured.

“I will, hyung.”

“I mean her too,” the older man chuckled, smacking your ass playfully. Your tongue flitted out, slurping at Jungkook’s other ball from the side of your mouth as you sucked the first one, wiggling your ass at Yoongi to indicate that you heard him. Jungkook yelped, hands slamming down onto the pillows and clutching them, moaning out your name.

“What the fuck, what the fuck, holy shit…” His head hit the headboard lightly, speaking to the ceiling and maybe even the higher power himself. “H-How...? Why does it feel s-so good…?”

You felt Yoongi slide in, so easy because of all those back-to-back orgasms, and yet he still hissed at your tightness, muscles holding him firmly. You could cry with how good it felt, Yoongi finally fully inside you once again, filling you up just the way you liked, knowing how to hit your deepest spot right away, skillful and wonderful. You licked up Jungkook’s now hard length, moaning deeply as you slapped your hips back into Yoongi’s crotch. Yoongi moaned to match yours, enraptured by the feeling.

“Fuck, you feel so fucking good,” he hissed, nails digging into your ass. “Missed you so fucking much, my love.”

“I’ll do the moving, love,” you gasped back, squeezing Yoongi’s cock inside you. You reached for Jungkook’s right hand and grabbed it, planting it on your head. “Fuck my face, Jungkook. Please. Don’t hold back until you cum.”

Jungkook bit his lip, exhaling your name. “I think I love you.”

“And I definitely love you, so please give it to me.”

You closed your lips around him and sank down, looking up at him and his sweaty dark blue hair, his blown-out pupils, his outstretched tattooed arm, so fucking hot, fuck yes you loved him, him and his body and his work ethic and his sweetness and his firmness as he obeyed your command, thrusting into your mouth from below, filling your throat with the thick head.

Perfect.

You rocked your hips back to Jungkook’s rhythm, matching him, slow at first, but gradually faster, rougher, planting your hands on the bed for balance, completely focused on clenching your core and your mouth to fit the two cocks, giving them the maximum amount of pleasure that you could offer, suffocating them with tightness. It if was obscene before, it was ten times obscener now, Yoongi’s hand on your hip, barely having to move as you smacked your ass into him, Jungkook lurching you forward with his force, clenching his jaw as he chased his release, the bed screaming for help and none of you listening.

“You’re so fucking sexy, fuck, you always make me feel so good, can’t help but want you, need you, miss you so fucking much,” Jungkook gritted out, fingers curling in your hair, desperately and viscerally whimpering out your name as you tipped your head to change the angle, the sensitive head dragging against the roof of your mouth as he buried himself in your throat. “You’re so good to me, such a soft and tight mouth, fuck.”

You arched your back a little more, Yoongi hitting you deeper, hearing him suck in a tight breath at your movement.

“Tighter,” Yoongi growled. “I’m close, come on, give it to me.”

And then he smacked your ass with his open palm, making you moan around Jungkook’s thick cock, pussy clenching around Yoongi’s entire length, and then again, smack! Control slipping with every hit, falling into Jungkook’s pace, the sheer force of his hips pushing you down on Yoongi’s cock over and over, now only focused on hollowing out your cheeks and gripping Yoongi’s cock, the sudden twitching indicating that Yoongi was close, so close, holding out a little so he could watch you longer, torturing you just the way you liked, but he couldn’t hold out for long because you didn’t let him, walls pulsating around him brutally as you came, stuffed so full that you couldn’t think. Yoongi groaned your name, gripping your ass with both hands and digging his nails in your softness, cock jolting as he came in thick pumps, filling up the condom and swelling it against your walls.

It took Jungkook a little longer, but not that much longer, your mouth still locked tight and he hissed out your name, whimpering as he came down your throat, filling it with cum once again, so fast that you had to swallow hastily to breathe, and yet there was more, thick salty dribbles that made you moan, so delicious that you leaned into it, sucking Jungkook dry.

“A-ah, n-noona…”

Your body ached, flinching from oversensitivity, your mind swimming with pleasure. Had it ever felt this good before? You slid off Jungkook’s cock, falling against his thigh and using it like a pillow, chest heaving, sticky all over, lips overused, pussy throbbing, barely realizing that Yoongi had pulled out, far too spent to see straight.

“Fuck, I love you two…”

Yoongi’s face suddenly appeared, smug expression above you. He had crawled over your body, ruffled black hair hanging down, dark cat eyes gleaming.

“Romantic.”

“You’re one to talk.”

“Mmm.”

He leaned down and kissed you, smiling against your lips, mouthing his love to you, forming each word against your skin slowly so you knew. You smiled back, showering him with light pecks, mouthing the words back to him. Yoongi purred and lifted himself up, taking you with him.

“I can’t move,” you complained, using your arms to push yourself up to avoid straining Yoongi’s shoulders. He chuckled, not the least bit fooled by your whines. He pushed you into Jungkook’s hard chest, covered in sweat and cum, and sandwiched you between them, your face right beside Jungkook’s, cheek to cheek. You could feel the heat in his face, his hair sticking to it.

“Noona?”

“Hm?”

Everything was far too messy for this cuddle session, but that could wait.

“Is it okay if I love you?” Jungkook mumbled, burying his nose in your hair.

“Mhm,” Yoongi responded, sounding sleepy.

You brushed Jungkook’s hair away from his face. “I would very much like that.”

“Everything is dirty,” Yoongi grumbled.

“You are a main contributor,” you said cheerfully.

Yoongi grunted, leaning against you, squashing you a little harder against Jungkook. Nothing to complain about. You were enjoying every second of this.

“Jungkookie?”

“Hm, noona?”

You reached up and ran a hand through his dark cerulean hair. Jungkook hummed appreciatively, closing his eyes at your touch.

“You know this shade is Cookie Monster blue, right?”

“… Hah?”

“Does that make you Ggukkie Monster?”

Yoongi burst out laughing, raspy and full, a rare moment of Min Yoongi absolutely losing his shit.

-

part v "Sorry, Jungkook, you're not allowed this time."

--

masterpost

[purrincess-chat]

Marinette Dupain-Cheng’s Spite Playlist: Remix CH2

The feeeeeeels have only just begun! I think this Remix is going to pack a bigger emotional punch than the original, but the payoff will be so, so sweet. :)

As always, I am only sharing these here on this blog for you guys until like June when we reach chapter 21, so I need all of your love and support in the likes, comments, reblogs, tags, everywhere. Give me your feelings. I am fed by your keyboard smashes and emojis,

---

Previous  Next   AO3

Chapter 2: The Archer

Marinette froze on the sidewalk, scrambling to process what was happening. She closed her jaw and shifted her weight to mask her unease. Of course, she’d expected her friends to question her decision, but seeing Adrien outside the bakery door still came as a surprise. If there was anyone from her old school she was hoping to avoid, it was him. Alya she could handle, but she couldn’t bear to hear Adrien say how disappointed he was in her.

“I, uh…I have a lot of homework to catch up on and-” Her voice trailed off at his pained expression, and she tapped her feet hesitantly for a moment before sighing. She had never been good at resisting him. “Okay, you can come in.”

Adrien followed her up to the apartment silently, gaze fixed ahead. Marinette could only imagine what he was thinking. How could she do this? Why didn’t she tell anyone? Marinette avoided eye contact with him for fear of what she might see.

“Can I make you some tea?” She offered, setting her bag on the stairs.

“Sure.”

Perfect. Tea was a good excuse not to look at him, and she kept her back to him while she worked, pretending that she didn’t know where things were to stall for time. She was hyper-aware of his eyes on her, following her every move. Watching. Waiting. She couldn’t keep this up forever, so she might as well get it over with.

“So, what’s up?” she asked while she filled the kettle.

“Marinette.”

“Do you like sugar in your tea?”

“Marinette.”

“I think we have some honey around here somewhere…”

“Marinette.”

“Preference on cup color?”

“Marinette.”

She pressed her lips into a line, tapping her nail on the counter before turning around to face him. “I know what you’re going to say,” she said. “‘Why did you leave? How could you do this? I thought we were friends. Why didn’t you tell us?’ Look, I know, okay?”

Adrien waited for her to finish, expression grave, though he didn’t look disappointed or angry. No, there was something else in his expression, those green eyes clouded and hazy. Sad, she realized. Adrien’s eyes were full of sadness and worry, and honestly, she would have preferred disappointment. If he was disappointed, she could defend her decision, but sad only made her guilt worse. She would rather Adrien forget her entirely than look at her with those big sad eyes.

Marinette flinched when he took a step toward her, hands shaking at her sides until Adrien reached out to place his hands on her shoulders.

“Are you okay?” he asked softly.

“Aren’t you mad at me?” Tears bubbled in the corners of her eyes. “Don’t you want to know why I left without saying goodbye?”

“Because you’re hurting.” He trailed his thumb across her cheek to catch a tear. “No one believed you about Lila, and you felt like your friends were shunning you, so you left because you were hurt. How could I be mad at you?”

“I’m not just hurt…” Marinette shook her head. “I’m angry and heartbroken and frustrated and-” Her vision blurred, hot tears streaming down her cheeks. Adrien pulled her against his chest. Burying her face in his shoulder, she let all of her pain overflow.

A week ago, she would have killed for him to hold her like this, but the numbness weighing down her heart left no room for happiness. All of the color had been drained from her life from the friends she left behind right down to the clothes on her back. Everything was gray and dark. Even Adrien couldn’t bring light back to her world now.

“I’m sorry, Marinette,” he whispered. “This is all my fault.”

“No, it’s not!” She shook her head, sniffling noisily.

Adrien brushed another tear from her cheek. “I told you not to confront Lila, but I didn’t know you felt that strongly. If I hadn’t stopped you, then you wouldn’t have left,” he said. “I just didn’t want to cause conflict, and I hoped that Lila could be reasoned with if we could just get through to her, but…”

“There’s something else I should tell you,” Marinette said. “I wasn’t going to tell anyone because I didn’t think they’d believe me, but you already know the truth, so…”

The screech of the kettle interrupted before she could speak. She turned to tend to it, rubbing at her nose. Her hands shook as she poured, so Adrien placed his hands over hers to help her hold it steady. She’d almost forgotten how kind he was. At least this part of her old life wasn’t entirely lost. This precious, beautiful part.

“Talk to me,” Adrien said once they sat on the couch, and Marinette took a deep breath.

“I don’t think that there is a way to get through to Lila,” she said, voice hoarse as she swirled her index finger around the rim of her cup. “The day she came back to school, she came up to me in the bathroom and tried to manipulate me just like everyone else, and when I called her out on it, she turned on me in an instant. She told me that I was either with her or against her, and that if I didn’t play along, then she was going to turn everyone against me.”

“She said that?” Adrien gasped, and Marinette nodded, biting her lip.

“That’s not all,” she continued. “After she left, I was crying in the stall, and…an akuma came—the one that ended up turning her into Chameleon. It was meant for me.”

“Marinette…” He shifted closer to wrap an arm around her. “I had no idea.”

“I fought it off.” She shrugged, sipping her tea. “I’ve always been good at finding the silver lining, but with Lila…”

“Well, that would explain a lot about today then,” Adrien sighed. “She told everyone in class that you didn’t say goodbye because you don’t care about us and that you just wanted attention.”

“And let me guess, everyone in the class believed her?” Marinette grunted, rolling her eyes.

“I don’t think people know what to believe, but it made me sick to hear her say those things about you because I know they’re not true, and I think deep down everyone else does too.” He shifted his gaze down to his lap. “I should have said something, but…I guess I’m just a coward. You must think I’m a pretty bad friend.”

“I don’t think that!” she insisted. “You came over because you knew I was upset which is more than I can say about anyone else.”

“What do you think we should do?” he asked. “I still don’t think outright exposing her is the way to go.”

“No, she’s too crafty. She’ll just lie her way out of it.” Marinette affirmed with a disgusted scowl. “Honestly, I don’t think there is anything we can do to her without backlash. It’s our word against hers.”

“Yeah…” Adrien shifted with a guilty grimace. “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“How did you figure out that Lila was lying?” He glanced up to meet her gaze.

Marinette pursed her lips, debating how much truth to reveal to him. She supposed that lying wouldn’t be ideal in this situation, but she couldn’t exactly tell him everything. Sighing, she set her teacup down on the coffee table and turned to face him head-on.

“You’re probably not gonna like it,” she said, “but I’ll tell you.” She paused for a moment to draw in a breath before continuing. “The first day that Lila came to school, everyone was so impressed with everything she was saying, but the more stories I heard, the more suspicious I got. Everything seemed too amazing, then I saw her talking to you, and… I got concerned, so I followed you two—mostly Lila! I watched her buy that necklace at the store dump your father’s book in the trash, and I heard everything when Ladybug showed up, and so yeah.”

“You really followed us?” He quirked a brow. “So, you know how I know then.”

“Yeah…” She clasped her hands together in her lap and tapped her index fingers together. “I didn’t trust her, and I was worried about you.”

A smile curled on his lips, and he tilted her chin to look at him. “You’re always looking out for your friends,” he said. “I’m really sorry that everyone else sided against you. For what it’s worth, I prefer your company to Lila’s any day.”

She smiled at that. “Thank you, Adrien.”

“I wish you hadn’t left, but I understand why you did,” he said, “I’d never ask you to come back somewhere where you felt victimized, but I am going to miss seeing you every day.”

“You can come by any time you like.” Marinette offered. “You’re my friend, Adrien, and just because I changed schools doesn’t mean that has to stop.”

“You’re right.” He took her hands and gave them a squeeze. “Promise me you’ll keep in touch?”

“Oh, I will,” she said. “One of my new friends is a big fan of yours.”

“I’d love to meet them, and if ever you need me, I’ll always be here for you,” he assured her.

Marinette relaxed at the sentiment before letting out a deep breath.

“I guess we just have to hope that Lila lies herself into a corner,” she said.

“She will, eventually. Then everyone will see her for who she truly is,” Adrien said. “Liars only hurt themselves in the end.”

“Yeah…” Marinette pursed her lips, then taking a chance said, “Well, if you’re free for a while… we could do our homework together. It’ll take our minds off of everything.”

“That sounds nice, and you can tell me about your new school.” He perked up.

The tension in the room faded, but before they could move, Marinette’s dad burst through the front door. “I brought up some fresh baked cookies for you two.” He announced, setting the plate on the coffee table.

“Thanks, Papa.” Marinette stretched up to kiss his cheek. “Adrien and I are gonna do our homework.”

“I won’t get in your way then,” her dad said. He brushed her cheek with his finger. “I can’t wait to hear all about your first day tonight. Your mother and I will be down in the bakery if you two need anything.”

“Thanks, Mr. Dupain,” Adrien said politely. When her dad retreated back to the bakery, he added, “Your parents are nice. I can see where you get it from,” he said sincerely. “You’re always doing your best to help others without ever asking for anything in return. I’ve always really admired that about you, Marinette. The world could use more people like you.”

Marinette covered her face with her hands, cheeks hot with embarrassment. She wasn’t prepared for such compliments today, but she’d be lying if she said it didn’t cheer her up.

He chuckled, pulling her hands away from her face. “I’m happy we’re friends, Marinette, and if you ever need anything, don’t hesitate to call.”

The golden glow of the setting sun through the window illuminated his face, and for one fleeting moment, all of the colors she once loved flashed in his eyes. For the first time since making her decision, Marinette felt like everything would be okay.

She gave his hands a squeeze and offered him a shy smile. “Thank you, Adrien. For everything.”

♪♫♪ Haunted ♪♫♪

Alya stuffed her books into her bag, lacking her usual enthusiasm. Nothing in her world seemed right that day. Every time she glanced over at Marinette’s empty seat, her chest tightened. Now as she stood in front of her locker, staring at old pictures hanging inside, Lila’s words echoed in her mind.

“Maybe she wasn’t really your friend after all.”

That couldn’t be true. Marinette was her best friend. They told each other everything.

“If she really cared about you, she would have told you she was leaving.”

There had to be an explanation, but Alya couldn’t think of one.

“Maybe you don’t know her as well as you thought you did.”

True, Marinette was always running late and coming up with excuses, but Alya always thought she was just scatter-brained. Maybe Lila was right, and Marinette was hiding something from all of them. Maybe all she wanted was attention. The only people Marinette ever clashed with were Chloe and Lila—two people who got tons of attention from everyone. Not to mention she was always strangely possessive of Adrien…

Alya shook her head to clear it, but her doubts remained, questioning everything about her friendship with Marinette. What was real, and what wasn’t? Everything she thought she knew had been turned on its head so quickly that she didn’t have time to get her bearings. Marinette was gone, and from the looks of it, she wasn’t coming back to offer any explanations.

The photos of the two of them smiled back at Alya, and the pressure in her chest returned as angry tears bubbled in her eyes. How could she leave without saying goodbye? Didn’t their friendship mean anything to her?

With a growl, Alya reached inside and ripped the photos out, tearing them to shreds as she sank to her knees. She squeezed her eyes shut, clutching the last picture as tears rolled down her cheeks. Lost in her anguish, she didn’t notice the black butterfly hovering over her until it touched the edge of the photo, and a familiar voice sounded in her head.

“Hello, again.”

[hypmic-writings]

Hello!! Can I request some HCs for samatoki, Gentaro n Hifumi with a s/o that tends to not look after themselves emotional-wise ? (Like they don’t really take time for self care n stuff like that) I hope that made sense English isn’t my first language ^^;

━━ ∘◦ ☆ ◦∘ ━━

Pairing: Samatoki Aohitsugi x reader; Gentaro Yumeno x Reader; Hifumi Izanami x reader

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: Self-deprecation 

A/N: Your English is perfect, no worries! And ooof I feel this because sometimes I forget to take care of myself as well. Remember to drink some water, un-clench your jaw, and take some time for yourself to relax a bit every day! Self-care is so important! Hope you enjoy~

⋘ ──── ∗ ⋅◈⋅ ∗ ──── ⋙

Samatoki Aohitsugi:

Samatoki is going to be very upset with you when he finds out you haven’t been taking good care of yourself

you’re one of the most important people in the world to him, so the fact that you’re not looking after yourself is gonna make him angry

expect to get chewed out for your current state of living because he’s definitely going to go into protective mode

he might get a little angry with you and demand that you start making better, healthier changes

but he’s also 100% definitely going to step in to help you because Samatoki is a man of action and he’ll be dammed if he’s just gonna sit back and watch you not take care of yourself

keep forgetting to eat? Samatoki has already meal prepped the whole week for you

keep forgetting to drink water? You get a little text from him every few hours with an angry face emoji telling you to drink something

keep forgetting to take a break from work? He’s going to drag you out of the house to go on a walk with him just to get some fresh air

he’s going to seem pushy about it, but that’s really just the way that he shows he cares about you

Samatoki will go out of his ways to do things with you just to make sure that you really are doing them, so expect a lot more dinner dates and phone calls from him

“Did you eat today? I swear to god, I’m going to come over there are force you to eat this riceball.”

“Ah, it’s okay, Toki, I ate your food...thank you.”

it hurts him when you don’t take care of yourself so he’s going to do everything in his power to make sure that he can help support you

every night he’ll grumble that he loves you and that you need to make sure you take care of yourself otherwise he’ll get angry

Gentaro Yumeno:

Gentaro is extremely perceptive and was actually able to ask you to take better care of yourself before you even realized that you were lacking the self-care in the first place

it’s going to be so painful for him to watch you forget your food at home, or not drink any water, or sit in your chair all day

how hypocritical of him though

he’s also someone that has to remind himself to do things (sometimes he gets so immersed in his writing that he’ll forget to eat for days) 

so instead, he’ll make it a point to remind you and, in turn, remind himself to practice self-care

he’s going to write you long, beautiful poems that basically boil down to ‘make sure you take a walk outside today’

and sometimes, if you have to work from home, he’ll set timers so that the both of you know when to take water/food breaks

rather than going out of his way to do things, he’s going to quietly interlace the self-care routines into his daily life so that you don’t notice too much

over time, you’ll casually realize that you’ve been drinking more water and going for longer walks and that’s when you would have to confront Gentaro for being too sneaky of a good boyfriend

“Gentaro, did you Pavlov me into taking better care of myself?”

“Of course not! Well...that’s a lie after all~” 

He’ll definitely make it a point to take you to new places around the city that he finds exciting, if only to get you to take a break from work

I can totally imagine him telling long, winded stories about people that went craze from not giving themselves 3 minute mental breaks every hour

even if you don’t believe him, you’re grateful that he cares in his own, very Gentaro, way

at the end of the day, though, he’s always going to want to make sure you’re treating yourself like the princess he thinks you are

Hifumi Izanami:

The thought of his kitten not taking care of themselves is going to hurt Hifumi’s heart

he’s going to sit you down and beg you to take better care of your health and possibly cry to get you to agree

he’s absolutely going to start cooking you lavish meals to make sure that you’re eating properly

and whenever you spend the night with him, he’s going to insist on spa days with face masks

“I promise, Y/N, the charcoal face masks are the perfect self-care routine!” 

“Okay, Fumi, I trust you.”

he’s also the type to send you voice memos throughout the day, telling you how much he loves you and that he hopes you’re taking care of yourself

he makes you download cute little apps that help you keep track of how much water you’re drinking throughout the day

he downloads them too just to make you feel that you’re not alone

he always assures you that he pretty much takes care of Doppo 24/7 so he’s a pro at being able to take care of you

and since you’re pretty important to him, he’s going to make sure that you’re not slacking on the self-care department

whenever the two of you are cuddling he’s going to press gentle kisses all over you and assure you that you are loved and valid

because self-love is also a very important part of self-care, he explains passionately 

Hifumi will honestly just try his best to show you how special you are to him and how sad it would make him if you stopped taking care of yourself

because he loves you and wants you to stay by his side, happy and healthy 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

[charming-charlie]

Lunch Break

Title // Lunch Break

Pairing // Evan Buckley x Reader

Warnings // Jealousy mostly? Little bit of teasing and some implied oral too.

Summary // Jealousy rears its ugly head at Station 118.

Word Count // 2.5k

Prompt // Buck's reaction when you ignored him because of something // “Come and sit on my lap, baby.” with bucky pls // “I wish I could tell the world.”- “Go ahead.”- “OKAY WORLD GUESS WHAT *insert name here* IS MY FREAKING BOYFRIEND/DATEFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND AND I REALLY-”*A puts hand over B’s mouth*- “I did not mean literally!” reader x evan omg

It was a perfect, beautifully sunny day in Los Angeles. The birds were singing, the air was warm, and life was good. Then again, you were just in a good mood. You had a romantic meal with your boyfriend, Evan Buckley, and he spent the night at your apartment. Nothing sexual happened, unfortunately, but you were okay with that. The dinner was followed by some hard yet serious conversations where the two of you let everything out and shared the most intimate thoughts. By the time you checked the clock, it was two in the morning and Buck had to get some sleep. He had an early shift the next morning.

When you woke up, he wasn’t there, but he did leave a fresh pot of coffee and a sweet text message saying he was looking forward to seeing you later. You figured it should be sooner rather than later, and you took the rest of the morning to shower, get dressed, and go through your morning routine.

It was around early afternoon when you arrived at the firehouse. Apparently, the crew just returned from a call. Chimney was putting equipment away and when he spotted you, his face melted immediately into shock. “Oh no. Who told you?” Chim asked once you finally reached within earshot.

The phrase lingered with a certain dread and you stopped in your tracks to look at him. Giving him a slight head tilt to emphasize your curiosity, you let out a confused smile. “Told me what?”

Chim couldn’t look more like a turtle if he tried. His shoulders hunched as if he were trying to hide or disappear. He turned back to the equipment, grabbing two very menacingly looking hammers and hooking them into one of the compartments on the firetruck. “Told you about our call. Buck and the girl,” he mumbled into the air. You had to strain to hear him, since he was avoiding your gaze completely.

“What girl?” you couldn’t help but ask.

Chimney pursed his lips and he closed his eyes. It was almost like he was trying to rack his brain for something else to say to you, but he sighed in defeat. He turned to look at you. “Buck scored a girl’s number on the last call. He didn’t deny it or said he was seeing someone.”

You were taken aback by that and the wheels in your brain were already turning. You couldn’t see Buck doing that, not after how close the two of you grew, and the sweet text message that was still on your phone. Yet Chim looked worried. Not for Buck but for you. You couldn’t help but think there was some truth to what Chim was telling you, especially given the fact that he was a terrible liar. This didn’t seem like a lie.

The more you thought about it, the more upset you became. Even though he spilled his guts last night, talking about how he transformed from Buck 1.0 to Buck 2.0, maybe that was all an act. Maybe that was just his move, a ploy to get unsuspecting women to fall head over heels for him. Maybe he was Buck 1.0 the entire time.

You nod at Chim, your way of thanking him without saying anything, and you turn on your heels to leave the firehouse. You tried to ignore Chim’s stare into your back but soon got distracted by seeing Buck walk toward you with a smile. He looked so pleasantly happy that for a second, you wanted to believe he has truly changed, and yet you could not bring yourself to smile back.

“Hey babe. Miss me already?” Buck asked you. He reached out to touch you, but you immediately pulled back and walked around him, like he wasn’t even there.

The smile fell from Buck’s face as you walked away from him. You didn’t even acknowledge him. It kind of hurt when you didn’t text him back but now you’re straight up ignoring him? What gives?

He followed the trail that you left behind, and it led him to Chimney, who was still busy restocking the truck with fresh supplies. “Hey Chim, do you have any idea why Y/N seems mad at me? She just walked off without saying anything.”

Chim shut one of the compartment doors with a loud thud, causing Buck to jump at the metallic sound. “I told her about the girl’s number you got earlier,” Chim said. He was now also avoiding Buck’s gaze. His eyes were staring right at the side of the truck, as though it were fascinating and capturing his attention.

“That—wait, what? That girl gave me her number to give to Eddie,” Buck went on the defense, looking defeated and upset, “how did she—I don’t understand. Y/N thinks I would do that?”

It sounded like he was talking to himself now and Chim used that opportunity to slip away and find somewhere to hide. Sure, he may have made a situation worse by not fully understanding what happened, but it was best to get out of there while Buck sorted through his thoughts. Buck thinking could be dangerous sometimes.

He whipped out his phone and starting texting you at lightning speed. He would send one sentence after another instead of a whole wall of text. He did this, knowing you would get every single notification. Your phone would constantly buzz from the incoming messages. You’d have to talk to him.

An hour went by and Buck was running out of things to send to you. He started sending every emoji individually, one by one. By the time he sent the yellow smiley with the halo, his phone rang.

“Y/N,” he answered with a hesitated smile. He didn’t want to get his hopes up, “I knew that would work.”

“What worked?” the voice on the other line was not you, but rather his sister, Maddie.

The defeated slump of Buck’s shoulders would have made a cartoon noise as he sat down in one of the comfy leather chairs at the firehouse. He lied; his hopes were up but the voice of his sister popped them away. He tried to put on a brave face to help mask his saddened voice, but Maddie wasn’t convinced.

“Nothing, what’s—”

“Are you and Y/N okay?”

Maddie interrupted him and Buck leaned back. He hated the fact that you were ignoring him when there was a simple explanation to the situation. Buck opened his mouth and was about to say something, anything, to get his sister off his back, but Maddie retorted with a smooth and confident, “Don’t lie to me.”

How she was able to read her brother over the phone was a mystery unto itself.

“She’s ignoring me,” Buck replied with a sigh. He didn’t really want to talk about it. He wanted to go back and continue texting the entire emoji alphabet to you. It hit him, then, that if you were trying to call him, the call wouldn’t go through since he was on the phone with his sister. Quickly sitting up, he mumbled a super-fast and hardly audible “I gotta go, Maddie. Talk later,” before he hung up on his sister and went back to staring at the phone.

You didn’t text him back and there was no indication of a missed call.

It took everything in his willpower to not chuck the phone at the wall, purely out of frustration. If he were not on duty right now, he’d be at your apartment and talk things out. His hand tightened around his phone, just in time for his best friend to stroll on by.

“You okay?” Eddie asked, looking at Buck with curiosity.

“It’s your fault,” Buck said suddenly. He couldn’t hide the bitterness in his voice as he rose to his feet.

“What is?” Eddie asked cautiously. He was walking backwards, away from Buck. When Buck was angry, it wasn’t a pretty sight. There was no violence or anything like that, but tensions did rise high when their resident goofball wasn’t his usual self.

“You and that girl flirting on the call today, and I’m supposed to give you her stupid number that she gave me to give to you and now my girlfriend isn’t talking to me because of you and that girl’s number and I’m going craz—”

Bobby was hearing the commotion and he quickly walked over to the scene. As the captain, he had to make sure his firefighters played nice. “Everything okay over here?” Bobby asked, looking back and forth from Eddie to Buck.

“Did you try calling Y/N?” Eddie interjected while ignoring Bobby’s question. He was unfazed by Buck’s tangent to make a point, something he was pretty used to after working at Station 118 for so long.

Buck stopped and immediately shut his mouth. The resentment on his face changed into something else. What was it? Guilt, maybe?

“What did you do?” Bobby asked while turning to Buck, “never mind, I don’t want to know.” After dealing with Buck and Eddie’s antics at the firehouse, sometimes Bobby needed to pick and choose his battles. He wasn’t going to pick and choose this one.

“Cap, can I…” Buck sheepishly started asking a question, like he was about to be scolded or something. He avoided Bobby’s gaze and let his voice trail off.

Bobby looked at Eddie, who shrugged and raised his hands in surrender, wanting no more part of the situation. Eventually, the Captain exhaled and nodded. “You have one hour, Buck. I’m making this your lunch break.”

With that, Evan Buckley was on a mission. He stopped by the farmer’s market and bought a bouquet of flowers and he raced to your place. The elevator in your apartment building was out of order, forcing the young but thankfully in shape fireman to dash two, sometimes three stairs at a time. He was just there this morning and it already felt comfortable, like he could see himself being more familiar with the apartment building as time went on. He hoped he would, but he just recently learned not to get his hopes up.

He rapped a few times on the door and used the flowers to cover up the peep hole so that you couldn’t see he was standing there.

“Who is it?” you asked through the door.

Buck wasted no time. “Delivery.”

“I didn’t order—” you began until you saw him. He was standing there, looking gorgeous like always. Every bone in your body was telling you to look away, shut the door, and go back to ignoring him. You turned away from him, and he held out the beautiful bundle of flowers.

“Delivery,” he said again, this time in a more apologetic and remorseful tone.

You took the flowers from his grip, and your fingertips brushed over his lightly. If you weren’t mad at him, you would be picturing those fingers brushing over other things, like different body parts.

“Today was a misunderstanding,” Buck said. He was giving you a look, a sweet, innocent look, and it was hard to look away. He knew just how to keep you captivated, how to keep you interested, and you found yourself opening the door to invite him in. He smiled a little and walked into the apartment that he was in only hours before.

It was a small place with one bedroom. Nothing like his two-story loft that he got to enjoy when he wasn’t working. However, the smaller apartment made things seem cozier. Even he couldn’t explain it, but he did like being there.

“The phone number was for Eddie, not me. The whole thing is a misunderstanding. Miscommunication at the firehouse, it’s not exactly uncommon. I wouldn’t do that to you,” Buck was saying. You were hanging on his every word. Sure, you may have taken things a bit extreme by ignoring him, and yet here he was, willing to fight for you and fight for a place in your life. You must give him credit for that.

“You really mean a lot to me, Y/N. I wish I could tell the world.”

“Go ahead.”

Buck stared at you, slowing blinking at your sudden permission to share his feelings. While last night’s deep conversations were perfect, it made the two of you closer to each other. Buck was in denial, but after realizing he could possibly lose you, even over something as a simple mistake, it made things a lot clearer to the fireman.

“Okay world, guess what!” Buck started shouting, catching you off guard, “Y/N is my freaking girlfriend and I really—”

You put a hand over his mouth. He was loud and you had neighbors on both sides of you and the walls were paper thin. The last thing you wanted was to deal with the cops over a noise complaint that your man was professing his love for you in a neighborhood apartment complex.

“I did not mean literally!” you whisper-shouted to Buck.

He was grinning behind your hand. You could feel it. His hidden smile only made you smile in return. Yeah, perhaps you were a tad dramatic today but so was he. Maybe it was proof that the two of you just felt fiercely for each other and needed the clarification that things were going to be okay.

Buck moved away from you and plopped down on your cream-colored loveseat. Your whole body turned to look at him as he relaxed. His eyes never left your gaze. He was staring at you, but not in a way that made you uncomfortable. There was a swirl of emotions in his eyes. He was staring at you, admiring you, like you were a work of art. In his eyes, you were.

“Come sit on my lap, baby.”

You didn’t need to be told twice. You walked up to him and sat down, one leg on either side of him as you straddled his waist, facing him. His hands found themselves pressing into the curves of your waist while your arms snaked themselves around his neck. “Don’t tell me you left your shift for this,” you told him in a whisper. His head seemed to be getting closer and closer to you, and you found yourself gravitating toward his lips.

“I’m on my lunch break,” Buck whispered against your lips.

You pushed your body against him. “Then you better eat something before you go back.”

Buck only smirked as his fingers slipped under the fabric of your shirt. Your little daydream from earlier, the one where you didn’t want to imagine Buck’s fingertips going places, was starting to come back the very moment he touched your bare skin.

“I’m working on it,” Buck replied huskily before letting his lips move against yours in a desperate need to claim them.

The drama from the afternoon seemed to evaporate and a bubble started forming around you and Buck. For now, at least for however long he had on his lunch break, nothing could pop the bubble. You two were in your own little world, safely confined within the walls of your apartment. Too bad your walls were paper thin though. Your neighbors might file a noise complaint after all.

[jinmindeulle]

the art of love | cs

pairing: choi san x reader ft. mentions of park seonghwa 

word count: 5.1k

genre: artist!reader, florist!san, exes to lovers au | angst, fluff

warnings: minor swearing

find ateez’s masterlist here!

enjoy ♥

How many deep breaths did I have to take to put myself together every time I started driving back to my hometown?

I think I stopped counting five years ago. It didn’t matter how many times I had done that, it had always driven me crazy.

But this time, it was worse.

“Please, text me when you’re on your way. Let’s meet at Jjinsong’s Café before going home. Be safe, love you!”

Yet, I couldn’t be mad. I missed my family too much to be upset over that. It’s been seven years, y/n, get over it!

I replied to my sister with a short message full of heart emojis and I put my phone inside my pocket. I started the car and glanced at my (ex?) apartment floor. Hope to see you empty when I get back.

Last time I visited my family’s home in Namhae, it was all tears and sad eyes. Making my way back to Seoul was one of the hardest things for me. However, every time I went back to the capital city, the driver’s seat was always taken by the same man, who at least tried to make my trip bearable by holding one of my hands when he could. But that day, I was the one driving, all alone.

I couldn’t break the news to my mother over the phone. She had gotten attached to him over the years. But she didn’t knew the whole truth, and honestly, going back to Namhae was way cheaper than calling my mom to tell her that I had rejected my boyfriend’s marriage proposal without second thoughts, and that my life was just a mess in general.

And I also needed to see her, my dad, my sister and my nephews. They were going to help healing my open scars. At least try to.

I picked a random playlist and kept it on repeat the whole trip. Fortunately, being a Thursday, the traffic was not that bad, especially at such an early hour. I really didn’t want to stay under that roof any longer. I felt miserable there. Why did I have to put it off that much?

“Why did you have to put it off that much?”

“I wonder exactly the same”

My sister looked at me with a raised eyebrow while she quietly sipped her coffee.

It had always amazed me how calm and collected Eunjung acted and reflected in situations like mine. She would never get upset unless it was the end of the world, and that hardly ever happened.

“I knew something was wrong since the last time you came home with him”

“But it was not that bad back then”

“You sure?”

“Well…”

He had been promoted a week before and his father had announced that he was soon going to retire, leaving him his position as CEO of one of the greatest companies in South Korea. It had easily gone to his head, and I wasn’t able to stand staying in the same room every time he brought that up.

“Maybe you’re right” I sighed, quietly stirring my own coffee. “I honestly don’t know, Jung. I didn’t like to think about it because it meant doing something about it. And I think I was way too comfortable living like that to try and change it.”

“And he made you do it”

“Pretty much, yes. I couldn’t get married to him. I don’t think I loved him enough to sacrifice what I wanted in life just for him”

“I’m glad you did that, y/n. It means you’re still chasing your dreams”

“I mean, yeah. I have always been. Not actively, but I kept dreaming about having my very own gallery, and everyone in Seoul wanting to have my art pieces on their living room’s walls.”

“Why not everyone in the country? Or in the world?”

“My dreams are more of the realistic type, Jung” I chuckled, munching my last chocolate cookie.

“How are you going to tell mom?”

“With your help?” I smiled innocently, trying to display the best puppy face I could master.

“And how do you want me to do that? ‘Hi mom, y/n here broke up with Seonghwa right after he proposed to her because it was not the life she wanted! Please don’t be that happy, it will break her poor heart!’”

“Eunjung! Please!” I begged “She won’t leave me alone and…”

“She will” my oldest and only sister interrupted me, smiling like the Cheshire Cat. “There’s been a rumour going around…”

“Wait, what’s going on?”

Eunjung sipped from her blue coffee mug and looked at me with the same innocent eyes I had displayed some seconds ago. Then, she quietly put the mug down and got closer to me over the wooden table, encouraging me to do the same. Once we were close enough to avoid being heard by the rest of the customers, she whispered in my ear.

“Rumour has it that Choi San is getting divorced”

I resoundingly sat back down, looking at my sister with a mix of weird emotions in my eyes. I hadn’t heard his name in ages. Not because I happened to not hear it, but just because I had deliberately asked my family not to bring his name up when I was around.

“Eunjung…”

“His wife cheated on him”

“Please, stop” I murmured, tightly closing my eyes, trying to get rid of the million memories that my brain decided to bring back after so many years of suppressing them. “You know how I feel about him”

“You’re telling me that after more than seven years you’re still upset about him and what you went through? You were like twenty years old, c’mon! You’re a woman now, y/n!”

“I was twenty two, and yes, I’m over it. But I don’t want to know, hear or talk about him. He’s dead to me. He’s been dead to me since the day I moved to Seoul, and will be until the end of my days”

“I didn’t know it was that deep”

“You were too busy taking care of your babies, Jung. And I’m not complaining here, I just know that you never got the full story, but it’s OK. It’s in the past now”

“You sure?”

“Stop making me question my life!” I cried, throwing a used paper napkin right at her face.

“What do you want me to say?”

My mom had always been understanding. She would calmly nod and hug me, telling me that everything was going to be okay, and letting me soak her blouse with my teenage tears. However, there were situations in which you could never guess what her reaction would be. And that was one of those times.

“Honey, I think we all knew that you were going to end things with that guy” my dad intercepted “but we weren’t aware of the fact that it was that bad”

“In all honestly, I wasn’t either” I murmured “it was just my routine. I had been waking up next to him for nearly five years. I had a job that let me live comfortably and not worry about anything else than buying expensive clothes every now and then because I was supposed to be accompanying Seonghwa in every fucking company’s party” I allowed me to cry for the first time, letting the pain and desperation out “I was living like a damn princess. But I never wanted that. I had never wanted that!” I sobbed. A pair of gentle arms held me tight, and I instantly knew that it was my mom. I hugged her back, holding onto her like she was the only oxygen mask available in a crashing plane.

“I know dear, I know. And I’m proud of you. You did what you wanted to do, because you should always do that. And it’s OK. It will never be a bad thing to follow your heart, y/n”

I nodded, drying the flowing tears with the back of my sleeve. “Thank you mom, dad. I love you”

“We love you too, darling” my dad affectionately kissed my cheek, chuckling when I showed him a weak smile. “Why don’t you take a shower while I finish preparing lunch? I bet your nephews want to see you as much as you do”

“Yeah, will do” I nodded, grabbing my large pastel purple suitcase. “I need to recharge before seeing those little demons”

The whole Thursday and the day before had been an emotional rollercoaster, so I expected to get the sleep I deserved. But sometimes things don’t go as planned. Just like my life, really.

The first night that I slept in my old room was just a blessing. No alarm clocks were rushing me out of bed, no angry faces were shaking me out of sleep, and no boring tasks were waiting for me in my office’s desk.  

“Aunt, wake up!”

I opened one of my eyes when the curtain was drawn and sunlight hit my face. I was about to bury my head in one of my pillows when the oldest of my nephews, Jiwon, took it away from me and slapped me with it.

“Mommy’s taking us to the park so we can have a picnic as breakfast!”

“And told us to wake you up so you can go with us!”

“Please, auntie! Wake up!”

I wanted to scream. I swear to God I loved those kids, but sometimes they made me think twice about having my own in the future. Yeah, well, it won’t happen anyways. You’re single now, and you’ll probably be forever.

“C’mon auntie! Or mommy will be upset!” Jihwan cried.

“I’m coming, I’m coming!” I sat up, rubbing my eyes. “Go tell your mom that I’ll be downstairs in like 10 minutes”

“Okey dokey!”

Getting ready in the mornings was not my favourite thing to do. I liked to pick whatever was clean in my closet and wear it like it was a Prada dress. Nonetheless, it was never like that for me. I had to be well dressed. I had to wear the actual Prada dress. I just couldn’t choose.

But that day, I could.

After taking a shower, I took my old, worn out pair of jeans out of my suitcase and put them on.

“It’s been so long since I wore these jeans” I whispered, caressing the fabric.

Next, I chose a simple, colourful shirt that I myself had intervened years ago, and tucked it in. The most comfortable pair of sneakers finished my look.

“You look like you’re twenty again”

“Oh Lord Jesus, knock next time!” I shouted, startled by my sister’s voice.

“You’re back to being you. I like that” she smiled at me from the door frame. “But hurry up! These kids are driving me crazy down there”

Taking a look around that familiar yet so long forgotten park, made me feel emotional once again. That was the reason why I always tried to avoid it every time I decided to return to Namhae. My hometown brought back too many memories, memories that I had decided to erase seven years ago.

But I was tired of it. And at that moment, my future was uncertain — what I had always feared the most. Bringing back painful memories was nothing for me at that point.

“Fluffy is crazy!”

“Give it to me, Hwanie” I took the red dog leash from my youngest nephew’s hand, trying to prevent the huge dog from running around the park chasing the ducks, and probably throwing to the ground the old ladies that were feeding them. “When did this dog get this big?”

“We are feeding him puppy food that makes him stronger, auntie!”

“Well, maybe you shouldn’t d… Fluffly!” the dog was able to release himself from the leash while I was giving wise advice, and started running towards the ducks, leaving us four way too far away to stop him before a massacre happened.

“Oh no!”

I reacted as fast as I could, although I knew I was way too late. My legs were not that fast, and even if they were, how was I supposed to have enough strength to pull him away from innocent ducks and old ladies?

Just when he was about to throw himself over the lake, a man in a black hoodie that covered most of his form took him from his collar and kept him under control. I kept running towards them, busy thinking about what that crazy dog would do to the stranger if he made a false step.

But I was stunned — and out of breath — when I found out that the beast was happily wagging his tail to the man, while he petted him. “Are you still misbehaving, Fluffy? Didn’t I teach you to stay calm near the ducks?”

“Uhm… hi?” I breathed out, trying to call attention to the man who still had his back to me. “The dog…”

“Are you still struggling to ta…”

My eyes watered in a matter of seconds. The man that I was successfully avoiding for years was standing right in front of me, looking the way I remembered him, like seven years had done nothing to him.

But he looked tired. Like he was going through hell and was needing a break from it all. His eyes had all the time shown his feelings, and back then, I was the only one able to read him like an open book. I knew in an instant that he was feeling like crap, but there was something else.

And maybe he was not the man that I used to know. Well, not maybe. He wasn’t the Choi San I had been in love with. The Choi San that I had cherished like no one else, who I had wanted to spend the rest of my life with and grow old together.

And I was not the same either.

“I…”

“It’s been so long” he sighed, looking me in the eye. I felt intimidated. I had forgotten how powerful his glances were, no matter the situation. He had always managed to do that to me, and I wasn’t ready to go through it once again. I had been invested in studying his glances way too many times in the past, and I was never able to reach a reasonable conclusion. So I just settled for leaving that matter alone.

“Yeah…” I exhaled, playing with the read leash in my hands.

“I didn’t know you were visiting your family”

“You know when I come here?”

“Of course I do. Everybody knows. It’s a small town, y/n”

I closed my eyes tightly upon hearing my name leave his lips. I felt like crying all over again, and I wasn’t willing to let him see me like that anymore. He had had enough of it. We both had.

“Should have guessed it” I nodded, looking down and avoiding his gaze. “Can you give me Fluffy back?”  

“Oh yeah, sorry” he petted the dog for the last time while I secured the leash back on his collar “He’s been misbehaving a lot lately”

“You know him?”

“I helped Eunjung a couple of times with him. She told me it’s been hard to keep him quiet when they take him out to the park so I offered to help. I need to take a break from life sometimes, and he’s great company”

“He seems to like you a lot” I smiled weakly, looking down at the happy dog who was still wagging his tail while looking at San with what seemed like adoration.

“I think so, yeah” he giggled softly, petting him once again. “He’s nice, but he needs some rules before it goes out of hand”

“I’ll make sure to tame him, then”

“You’re staying?” I mustered all of my courage, and looked up to meet his eyes. His voice tone had changed tremendously, but I wasn’t sure what that meant. This was a new Choi San for me after all.

“For some weeks, yeah. I still don’t know how many, to be honest”

“You’re on a little vacation with your boyfriend?”

“I…” I was about to reply, but then it just hit me. I was talking to Choi San, the man that had marked my whole existence with burning, hurtful words. He had given me everything and taken it away from me as fast as he could. So no, I was not giving him explanations. “Yeah. Well, goodbye, San.”

And I left as fast as I got there.

After my encounter with San, I kept thinking about him and everything that happened in those years together. Not only the tragic ending, but also the beautiful things. And that made me realize that I could at least get part of it back.

Although Eunjung saw everything, she didn’t bring it up. She knew that I was struggling — and I’m pretty sure she heard me that night.

So while a soft breeze accompanied me as I was watching the night skies in the petit balcony of my room, I decided to make my way towards the basement to find the boxes full of the stuff I had left there and never used ever again. Many oleos were dry and unusable, but some others seemed to be just fine. I took one of the empty canvases and my easel as well as my collection of paintbrushes, and went back to my balcony.

“How had I missed you” I whispered, looking at my empty canvas. Tears gathered in my eyes, and a sad smile appeared on my lips as they rolled down my cheeks. “I really missed this”

But although I tried, I couldn’t bring myself to do anything more than a soft stroke which was supposed to be the very same night sky above me.

My hand didn’t respond. It was painful.

So I let it all out. My desperate cries were most probably heard around the neighbourhood, but that was my last concern. The only thing that was supposed to make me happy turned out to be a total failure.

I had no purpose. I had ruined my career as a painter years ago. Why would I paint a night sky that would be seen by no one but me? That would be recognized by no one but me?

San was right.

He had been right all along.

“Why didn’t you tell me that you ran into San yesterday?”

Mornings at home were usually not that noisy, but that day it had to be. My mom had organized a tea party with her girlfriends, and I was supposed to help her out as the only one who was free around the house. My dad was out of town for the weekend because of work, and my sister decided to go out with her sons, probably trying to get away from our mom’s demands.

“Eunjung told you?” I sighed, mixing the cupcake mix faster than I was supposed to so that I could get out of there.

“Yep” she nodded.

“I don’t want to talk about him. You know he’s dead to me”

But even though I said it bluntly, I was feeling like that sentence had no meaning to me anymore.

“You’re being too rude, y/n”

“I’m being honest, mom.” I stopped my eager mixing and looked at her, supporting my weight against the kitchen counter, and crossed my arms over my chest. “I know you and everyone in this town love San. But I don’t, and I don’t want to talk about him anymore. Please”

“Fine” she sighed “Then lend me a hand with the stra— oh Dear God!”

“What’s wrong?”

“I was supposed to bake a strawberry cake but I totally forgot about buying the strawberries”

I rolled my eyes. Totally my mom’s behaviour. “I’ll go to the supermarket. Anything else?”

I shouldn’t have asked that.

Making my way down the aisles, I struggled to find everything that my mom asked me to buy.

“Where the hell are these fucking powders?” I murmured, slowly walking with my cart and carefully reading each package. “Well, not here”

I looked in front of me to check the signs over the aisles, but my eyes encountered something very different.

A painted night sky.

I knew that painting. I knew that night sky.

Those soft strokes and the shiny details on the moon were familiar. Too familiar.

Of course. They were mine.

And once I understood that I was not looking at an actual painting but the back of an intervened denim jacket, it all came crushing down once again.

But I didn’t have enough time to run away.

He turned around and saw me. I froze like I hadn’t just seen him the day before. My eyes became glossy once again. Keep it together, y/n!

“I thought that yesterday was a coincidence. But I don’t believe that anymore”

San was right in front of me now, a couple of meters away from me. He was carrying some instant noodles in his hands and a bottle of water.

“Let’s not do this, please” I shook my head, tightly gripping the cart’s handle.

“We need to talk, y/n”

“There’s nothing to talk about, San” I gasped, avoiding his eyes.

“If your eyes keep watering whenever you see me and my heart keeps pounding whenever I see you, then yes, there’s a lot of talking to do” he calmly stated, taking a step closer to me “I know you have been avoiding me, and I cannot blame you alone. I also had whenever I knew you were around. But this needs to stop” he sighed “I am aware of the fact that you’re in a relationship and I don’t int—“

“I’m not” I interrupted him, looking at him in the eye “I left him. That’s why I’m here”

“I’m… I’m so sorry to hear that” he said, and I could clearly see the sincerity in his eyes.

“It’s okay…” I whispered.

“Can we please meet so we can finally say whatever we have to say to each other before you leave?”

“San, I… I find it really hard to talk to you” I came clean, playing with the ends of my shirt “You hurt me a lot, and… and I really don’t want to keep digging in the same old scars. But maybe…” I took a deep breath “Maybe it will help to finally close them”

He nodded “I know, y/n. I need this. We need this”

“What about your wife?”

I just had to ask. He knew about me and Seonghwa, so it was only fair.

“It’s a long story, but in a nutshell, I’m divorcing her”

“I’m so—“

“Don’t bother” he shook his head, chuckling with a noticeable pain in his voice “I’m not sorry, so no one should be for me. Especially you.”

I don’t know why I was so nervous. It was just San. Choi San, that beautiful, talented and perfect man.

And that was the problem.

Choi San had always been a mystery. A simple mystery. Back then, he liked to show me that he needed to wear nothing more than a dazzling smile to make my day better. He used to take me out at night to stargaze because he thought that I could find inspiration up there.

“You need to paint these, baby” he had said “I know you’ll do an outstanding job”

And of course I painted them. Every single one of them.

“Could you pretty please paint this same sky on the back of my denim jacket?” he had asked.

“Why do you want me to do that, Sanshine?” I had chuckled, looking up from his chest so that I could see his stunning features illuminated by the stars.  

“Because today I feel like I could do anything I want with my life. I have you, so that’s enough” he had replied, sweetly kissing me afterwards.

I hadn’t been enough, though.

My thoughts were abruptly interrupted when I felt his sweet perfume coming near me. I turned my head to my right, and I was able to distinguish his slender form from afar. He was still wearing that denim jacket and carried a large envelope in his hands.

“Hey there” he softly smiled.

“Hi San” I replied, trying to get rid of any sign of desperation in my voice.

“Do you want us to stay here or you prefer to go where used to… hang out?”

“I’m perfectly fine here” I sat back down on the bench, and he cautiously did the same, both of us in each end of it. The evening was warm and a nice breeze hit our faces. Although there were no stars yet, they were on their way.

And I honestly wasn’t ready to stargaze with San.

“Shall I start by saying that I am truly sorry?” after some minutes of silence, San broke the ice. “I never meant to hurt you like that. But I know that saying sorry now it’s meaningless. I just want you to let it all out, say the things that you wanted to yell at that 23 year old me but you never got to” the sorrow in his voice was evident, and I believed him. I felt how sorry he was for what he told me that night.

But it still haunted me. So I had to tell him.

“You ruined my dreams, San.” I whispered, already feeling hot tears go down my face. “You were my only fan back then. You encouraged me to keep going, practising, learning, and experimenting. But that night… you just threw that away. Why would you tell me that I was never going to be successful? Why would you yell right at my face that I was talentless?” I sobbed “That my paintings were nothing special and that I would never become a renowned artist if I kept painting night skies, when you were the one who encouraged me to do that in the first place?” And just as he wanted me, I let it all out. “You buried my dreams. You crushed them and you even made sure to throw them to the trash before leaving. I hated you for so long! I despised you! You were my best friend who suddenly became my worst enemy. But why? I just want to know that. I don’t care if you still think that my paintings were garbage. That’s my last concern” I sighed, violently drying the still falling tears “I just want to know why”

I looked at him, and it made me feel a little bit better to know that I was not the only one crying about it. Although he kept silent, his cheeks were soaked, and his eyes reddened and puffy. “You were talking about leaving Namhae” he whispered, looking down at the grass that surrounded us “and I couldn’t go with you, so I just needed you to stay. But after you moved to Seoul, I realized that I was being selfish and that I thought of my happiness over yours. I was going to be happy if you stayed with me, working at the flower shop and painting night skies as a hobby. But you would never have been if you did that” he cried, letting out a sorrowed and choppy breath. “And for the record, I never meant those words, y/n. I never believed that, and I know for a fact that I’m still your number one fan. You are the most talented person I know. You are amazing, and you more than anyone in this world deserve to be recognized out there. I’m so sorry for making you believe the opposite.”

I stayed silent, processing San’s explanation.

If we just had talked it out back then, maybe, just maybe…

“We were young and stupid” I finally replied. “I was trying to get out of Namhae to become an artist and I tried to take you with me. You were building your flower shop here and you tried to make me stay. It was never going to work out even if we tried” I reasoned, getting closer to him.

“But I shouldn’t have said that anyways” he shook his head “I prevented you from pursuing your dreams”

“I was stupid enough to believe that and stopped trying. I should have kept painting despite your words. I now see it” Slowly, San raised his head and looked at me in the eye. I weakly smiled at him, taking one of his hands for the first time in seven years. “I’m sorry too, San. I blamed you for my misery when I was the one who had to go after my dreams anyways”

“We both fucked up. But it’s on the past now, and we’re still young” he tightened his grip on my hand and shook the mysterious envelope with the other “I don’t know about you, but I just came from my attorney’s office. I’m officially divorced”

“I can’t believe our lives turned out this way” I quietly laughed, playing with San’s fingers. “If you had asked my 20 year old self, I probably would have said we were having our own house full of flowers and paintings by now, and why not add a couple of wedding rings. I was delusional”

“Not really, y/n. I expected that as well” his free hand softly caressed my cheek, travelling down to my jaw. He carefully grabbed my chin, making me look at him. I felt my eyes watering again, and San raised an eyebrow, showing me his confused gaze “Is there something wrong, baby?” he whispered.

I let out my tears, because I wasn’t trying to hide them from him anymore. “I’m just happy” I replied “I used to think that seeing you again was a mistake. That living in my luxurious Seoul apartment with a man that I no longer loved was what I needed to live the decent life that I was supposed to have. And now I know that it was just me trying to supress the urge that I had to come back to you. Because despite the horrible ending, you made me be who I am today. You loved me endlessly, San. And I hope you still do” I admitted, blushing like I was that 20 year old once again “Because I know I never stopped loving you, Sanshine. Even when I hated you the most”

He replied in the most beautiful way. A sweet, awaited, and loving kiss.

Although it wasn’t, it felt like the first time. No rushing, no hurting. Just love.

The love that I was waiting to get from someone that actually never loved me like San did.

The love that San was waiting to get from someone that actually never loved him like I did.

The love that we both deserved to get after so long.  

— jinmindeulle ♥ 

[columbia-canaille]

How bad things really are: Australia.

Freedom of Speech:

An Australian Judge just determined that freedom of speech may not be protected by Australia's constitution.

In September, more than half of Australia’s environmental scientists working for the federal and state governments reported that they had been “prohibited from communicating scientific information” to the general public.

Public servants can be fired for making political commentary on social media. This includes "criticizing" politicians, "associating" with "groups or individuals", and declare "liking or sharing" is akin to creating a post- and even using the emoji "angry face icon".

The Police can force you to remove posts from Social Media, and fine you $555,000 if you fail to remove the content in 24 hours.

Anti-lockdown posts can result in a $11,000 fine.

Someone spray-painted a Nazi Swastika on their police station in protest (9/1/2021). The police claimed to be the victim of "a frightening hate crime" so the very next day, Australia banned the use of Nazi symbols (9/2/2021). In other words, you can not compare police actions or political legislation to Nazism.

Religious Freedoms:

Australian police are busting synagogues and churches for their religious practices, tout that they ‘will not tolerate’ anyone gathering.

Right now they are hunting a group of hundreds of Jews that escaped their police raid on Rosh Hashanah.

Economic Freedom:

Many Australian businesses have been forced to shut down permanently due to Covid measures:

Businesses face $10000 fines for allowing their 'non-essential' workers to come in.

They are very literally paying people to stay locked down in their houses, and fining people for coming outside.

Can not leave their homes:

The lockdowns in Australia are currently Military-Enforced.

You're not allowed to leave your home unless it's to collect groceries, give medical care, work (with a permit), got to school (for 2hrs one a day), or get a covid vaccine locally. This is their 6th lockdown.

It's a $3,700 fine if you do leave your house in Sydney.

The fine for leaving the house without wearing a mask has raised from $200 to $500. The police are going door to door to make sure you are complying!

They have opened a tip-line for civilians to snitch on family, friends, and neighbors who break the rules.

In a rant about people using outdoor pop-up bars for “pub crawls,” Victoria Premier Daniel Andrews asserted that patrons are banned from removing their masks to drink.

Authorities shot dead several dogs in an animal shelter in order to prevent volunteers from leaving home to care for them.

Can Not Escape their Country:

It is illegal to travel into locked-down regions under any circumstances, even to attend a funeral. This is enforced through the numerous police checkpoints across the country, and authorities pledging to take a “no-nonsense approach” to dissent.

You can not travel to or from Melbourne without breaching coivd restrictions. The Melbourne "Ring of Steel" from 2020 is still up, barring residence from fleeing flee to regional Victoria, attempts attempts are a $5000 fine.

You can not travel to or from Greater Sydney without a "reasonable excuse", and you will need to apply for an entry permit. Many domestic flying services are shut down as a result. There is also a suspension of free travel between New Zealand and NSW.

There is currently a ban on overseas travel from Australia, unless granted an exemption.

Everyone travelling to the NT is required to complete an online Border Entry Form. If you have been to a declared interstate hotspot or a public exposure site in the 14-days prior to arriving in the NT, you will not be permitted entry into the Territory.

The Queensland Government has restricted entry into and out of Queensland.

Travellers arriving from the Australian Capital Territory (ACT), New South Wales, some zones in Queensland, and Victoria are currently prohibited from entering South Australia, except for Essential Travellers and some permitted arrivals.

All people arriving into WA from overseas or interstate, including returning WA residents, must complete a G2G Pass.

Protests:

There is little, scattered news coverage about the protests that have been going on in Australia as of 2021. Finding raw videos of protests is increasingly difficult as Australians can be prosecuted for posting prohibited content.