#they make each other feel insecure!!!

[doiliedaze]

Muse of Mine

Warnings: insecure reader, mentions of reader being demisexual and romantic, reader is insecure of her body hair, childhood friends to lovers, and they were roommates, artist x artist, Ellie is a sculptor & reader is a painter, smau, college au

Genre: fluff and angst

A/n: champagne coast, nights and useless have been repeating in my head for inspo so take that as you may! I’ve had well I’m having a complex relationship with my demi identity so I wanted to add that. I was gonna make this a series but it ended up making more sense as a one-shot to me however I might expand on this universe.

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Ellie Williams has been your best friend since before you could remember. Your family moved to Jackson and you hated it, it was so different from what you were use to.

One day a small rock hit your window catching your attention and you saw a freckled faced, brown hair girl in a wonky ponytail. You thought she was the cutest thing ever but you didn’t know how to express that. So you held it inside.

After a girl in sixth grade called you an “ugly dyke” and Ellie punched her in the face, the two of you were glued by the hip. This grew your crush but you pushed it down to just being friends. She took you on nature walks and you would get distracted when you were supposed to be listening to her facts. You would make her share earphones with you and yap about how amazing Billie Holiday is even though she could give a rats ass about jazz.

None of that mattered because it was for each other.

You’ve always had a complicated relationship with expressing your romantic and sexual desires. They are there but it feels selective? You’ve always had a hard time explaining it but Ellie always seemed to understand.

Everything made sense around her. She felt the same about you. She would make jokes about how being around you, staring at you, sculpting you was how she realized she likes girls and the type of girls she likes at that.

How sometimes she feels like it’s you two against the world.

All these events and hints drive you crazy. Now that Ellie the girl you’re not so secretly in love with is asking you to model naked for her sculpturing class.

It felt like she begged for hours but here you are, stripping and her eyes are unrelenting. “I’m not even posing yet so you don’t have to stare.” You mutter, “sorry thinking about uh composition!”

She scrambles to finish her set-up. “Els I didn’t trim so I’m mentally preparing myself…” you whisper finding any excuse to not be vulnerable in front of her. When she turned around she muttered “like some hair is going to bother me” and you laugh at her.

The transparent sheet does nothing to cover you no matter how much you try. “This isn’t funny! I’ve never like stood around naked without some mental prep.”

Ellie moves behind you, still giving you space but her hand reaches out to touch your back. “Let me show you how beautiful I think you are please.” The project is about desire and beauty so obviously she chose you. “You know you can trust me and if you really don’t want to do it then we don’t have to.”

You take a second to compose your thoughts. “It’ll be faceless right?”

“Yes absolutely, I wouldn’t do that to you.”

You felt your heart flutter as you drop the sheet. Ellie clears her throat, falling silent for a while as she started molding the clay.

Hours pass and it was more relaxing than you thought it be. She would get up to fix your pose or the two of you would take little breaks.

“Els my back hurts” You whine, “I know sweet pea just a little longer.” She says below a whisper.

Her glare when she would shift it from the clay would go between love and carnal.

Eventually she stands up and cracks her back. “Alright I’m done for the day, thank you for being my muse.” She laughs softly and helps you get dressed.

“Y’know I don’t need your help right?”

Your voice swells into the silence of the room as her hands roam a little as she “helps.”

Ellie’s eyes never leave yours as her freckled fingers graze over your rolls, lingering against your plush skin. Not breaking eye contact she kneels down to put your underwear on.

“Thank you” you say in a voice so soft you barely hear it. She gives you a curt nod as she stands. With a shake she moves from you, “I gotta move this to my room so goodnight!” She hurries as she almost drops the clay but she closes the door swiftly with her foot.

Bewitched and bewildered you sit on your bed wondering what is this relationship?

───────┈ · ·

A/n: this one was hard for me to write! I took a little break and I have a lot going on at the moment, and a lot of the next fics have vulnerable topics so I’m trying so I’m sorry if this feels choppy as I’m trying to get back to my flow 🫶🏿

Dividers- @thecutestgrotto

Taglist: @manfuckthisimout @bambishaven @femme-historian @furrytaesss @milanyas @highnfemme @5seos

[dimonds456]

Gonna say something controversial.

Ford Pines is a nuanced character who is neither good nor bad. Absolving him of his crimes is actively a detriment to his character and does a disservice to the storytelling of Gravity Falls, but defining him exclusively by his mistakes without taking the time to understand him is a purposefully bad faith take that actively makes your enjoyment of the show worse.

He is neither a good or bad person, because "good" people and "bad" people aren't real. There's just people. And people fuck up sometimes.

If no one fucked up and if no one held onto those fuckups sometimes out of sheer desperation, the world of fiction would be way more boring, unengaging, and dull.

Ford Pines is a mess and I don't want him to be sanitized or demonized. I just want him to be a mess.

Thank you

[dirtytransmasc]

I refuse to go into more detail, but, I will no longer hold my tongue. my biggest gripe with this fandom is the way a majority of it erases Lo'ak's actual trauma and struggles (with his identity, his father/family, his clan, etc), and essentially gives him Spider's traumas/struggles in some idealized form (whether for over the top and oversimplified "hurt/comfort" scenarios, or max woobification), while absolutely dragging and/or ignoring Spider's entire character and the realistic depictions of those traumas and what that does to a kid.

like I can't exactly put words to it or go into a deep analytical post, but I've been thinking about it, and some other stuff I've seen online have been making me think about it.

stop doing a disservice to both of my boys. they both have such interesting and complex stories and you're ruining it!!!

[screechingfromthevoid]

@disastertourwaterdeepedition

Sorry for the weird fucking post but like tumblr straight up ate your ask?? I had to search and screenshot from my email??

Its like super fine I love big rants and big feelings (especially about the blorbo of the month).

Whoa buddy if you wanna talk about a rant. This got so long I'm putting it under a read more.

I'm not sure any of this is above board conscious thought process. When he looks to Orym, when he thinks about how he feels about Orym, I think Dorian, king of compartmentalizing, gets a rush of all three of the things in the post. He gets a little too lost in thought looking at the way Orym's hair now tries to curl against his ear or how well tailored the armor is to his body, he first gets hit with the Will guilt. Then he thinks about "ohmygodtheresawaron" and he'd shovel all of that down. Because its not time to think about Orym and him. But he knows by the way Orym watches him "sleep". He knows by the way Orym refused to be princess carried in Aeror. (Seriously dude Dorian princess carries everyone. It would have been less suspicious if you let it happen). He knows because Orym didn't see his husband when they were in Zephrah. But when he dares himself to actually think about a possible future together, he uses the big three to shove it down. And no, he has no clue that Orym thinks he doesn't return his feelings. (Wow you're right. Pronouns are hard)

Lol to finally answer your question: I'm not sure! Because the thing is! Orym has gone down twice in a battle with Dorian there! And honestly if Orym being on death's door doesn't make either of them confess, i'm not sure what will! (thats a lie I do have an idea). But like Orym went to the moon and back and almost died on the moon and all the count communicate to Dorian was "I miss you"!! Orym nearly died twice in one battle and he didn't think to give Dorian a sloppy, "If I die again I want to have kissed you once" kiss before going in for another round of getting hacked on. Dorian watched him go down and had to bring him back from death's door (one failed save scared the shit out of me) and he didn't think to give Orym a "We need you, I need you" kiss.

My unfortunate thought process, which I can't decide if I want it to come true or not, is that Dorian has to get hurt. Like when I say hurt I fucking mean it. Taken down in a round or two, two failed death saves, hurt. Because then Orym will have to face losing Dorian again. Face losing the man he loves, again. He pours a healing potion into Dorian's mouth because warlocks don't have a single healing spell. (Just checked). Orym feels so helpless in saving Dorian, because a healing potion isn't nearly enough to keep him up. He starts to cry over Dorian's (now conscious) body. He whispers between sobs "Not again, not again. Dorian you can't leave me. I love you, please, I never got to tell you, please stay alive." and Dorian, having heard all of that, reaches up to cup Orym's cheek and says. "Alright, just for you though."

Or something like that.

As much as I would love for them to be adults and just talk to each other. I know thats not going to happen. (Please, Robbie, Liam, prove me wrong.) So I think major tragedy will be the reason they confess to each other. Because they're idiots in love with a lot of weight on their shoulders.

[perhaps-mr-collins-has-a-cousin]

It has been requested (@awfullybigwardrobe44 💛) that I provide an update on How Things Are Going With The Young Man, and there’s so much I could say that it all kind of cancels itself out (I’ve been journaling like a madwoman lately), but yes, I think things are going well. I still can't believe any of this is happening, I am not the kind of person that this kind of stuff is supposed to happen to 😆 We have gone on several more dates, one of them a day-long fishing trip, and it’s been lovely and I just think he's delightful and I really like being with him. I still have a lot of shyness to overcome, but considering how intensely terrified I used to be of him I think I’ve made excellent progress 😆 I’ve seen less of him lately because he’s extremely busy with work and especially school but we text a lot and this weekend we’re planning to go to dinner and then the symphony after that (I bought the tickets and I can tell it's driving him nuts that I finally paid for something myself but ahaha it's too late there's nothing he can do about it now) 😊

[tacagen]

one of the things that fascinate me about thawne: yes, he CAN be normal with kids! surprisingly normal!

((not at all times, though. his mental illness still spills through and as usual he, in trying to manipulate or hurt others, spits out at them the exact stuff that would hurt him (or have in his childhood/barry's rejection interpretation) the most in the first place lmao))

but at the same time. his like second instinct when doing his bullshit is FUCK THEM (as) KIDS

(and, well. whatever this classifies as)

[mcytegg]

I want Derap to steal Ro from the sticklers as his back up plan teammate

LMFAO???? i can fw that, it could be interesting but if its bc he thinks zam will betray him or smt then ro is such a funny secondary option bc zam is one of ro's most favouritest people on the server. and like. even w zam and ro being good friends aside, isnt one of the biggest issues in zam and derap's relationship derap's insecurity over devotions? if he wants a teammate who Isnt obsessed w mapicc then going from zam to ro is like saying "i hate citrus fruits. im gonna eat this lime instead of this lemon!" 😭😭😭

[chirpsythismorning]

When I suggest Mike’s arc is in part a queer coming of age story and not just him being some prize to help El or Will defeat the big bad—

Angry anons:

[ambyandony]

mutually overprotective

[silviakundera]

another snippet from the Grand Princess novel. I am going to be SO ANNOYING about this. (spoilers for their first life! )

Although he didn’t want to admit it, Pei Wenxuan still remembered that at the beginning of their marriage, when he lifted Li Rong’s veil, she raised her head and looked up at him with embarrassment and curiosity. Then, when they exchanged cups of wine, she said in a frank manner: “Wenxuan, no matter how we came to be together, having become husband and wife, I still want to live with you for the rest of my life.” At that time, he also seriously thought that he would live with Li Rong, have children and live peacefully for the rest of their lives.

That was, until Li Rong found out that he liked Qin Zhenzhen.

In truth, he didn’t even know what kind of feelings there were between him and Qin Zhenzhen, whether it was love or merely responsibility. They grew up together as children, and he only had her in his heart and hoped to live with Qin Zhenzhen for the rest of his life, but he could not do so.

Later on, Qin Zhenzhen married Li Rong’s brother, Crown Prince Li Chuan.

As Crown Prince, Li Chuan was a good Crown Prince but not a good husband. He married for political reasons, so although he was just the Crown Prince at the time, he already had a Princess Consort and four concubines. Qin Zhenzhen had a mild temperament and was unfamiliar with Palace affairs. If not for the Crown Prince’s favor and Pei Wenxuan’s help, she would have been long buried in the schemes of the Eastern Palace.

He helped her. Li Rong naturally knew about it, but she didn’t mention it at first. Later on, when he secretly rescued Qin Zhenzhen at a palace banquet and almost was exposed, Li Rong could only step in and help him with arrangements.

That day, they were sitting in the carriage on their way home, and Li Rong was silent. He was a little panicked at that time and wanted to explain, but he didn’t know what to explain because he felt that no matter what Li Rong said, she would be right.

Then, Li Rong returned home and after entering the bedchambers, she walked to the table and poured tea for herself. She turned her back to him and asked: “Do you like her?”

Pei Wenxuan stood at the door. He actually intended to say no, but he felt that it would not be completely truthful, so he replied honestly: “I can’t forget her.”

“What is your relationship with her?”

Li Rong held the cup of tea and looked very calm. Pei Wenxuan still told her the truth, their engagement when they were young because they were childhood sweethearts. After his family had fallen, the Qin family annulled the engagement, and Qin Zhenzhen was forced to marry into the Eastern Palace…

“I just wanted to help her,” He said in a low voice, “No other intentions. She’s the Crown Prince’s Side Consort now. There’s nothing else I can do.”

After he had spoken, Li Rong didn’t speak for a long time. That silence became a deeply engraved impression of that night for Pei Wenxuan.

He saw that Li Rong kept drinking water, one cup after another. After a while, Li Rong seemed to calm down. She turned her head, stared at him and only asked: “Will you betray me?”

“No.” He answered immediately. He looked at her, “You’re my wife.”

“I’m not your wife.”

Li Rong looked at him with a serious expression: “I’m just your ally.”

These words stunned Pei Wenxuan. Li Rong turned and looked out the window and calmly continued: “In this marriage, you and I had no choice and only did it for power. Truthfully speaking, there’s not one bit of love between us. You have someone in your heart, and I have someone in my heart. It’s just that we didn’t make it clear before and had some misunderstandings. Now that it’s clear, it doesn’t matter.”

“It’s not a big deal either,” Li Rong laughed, her tears seemed like they could fall at any time, “Why didn’t you say so sooner?”

Pei Wenxuan stared blankly at her. He wanted to deny it, but he felt that Li Rong wasn’t wrong either. There was no such love between him and Li Rong because it was impossible for a person to truly love two people at the same time. He already had Qin Zhenzhen in his heart, so how could he make room for Li Rong?

Seeing that he still had not spoken, Li Rong lowered her head and softly said: “If you make it clear, then it won’t be a problem. We will live as we have in the future, but I hope Pei daren remembers this in his heart:

I’m not your wife, and you’re not my husband. I don’t care who is in your heart, and you don’t need to care about who I am with. You and I will have our own lives, and we will each have our own happiness.”

“As long as Pei daren promises me,” Li Rong looked at him, her eyes sharp as a hawk, “You and I are allies, so we must never betray one another.”

That evening, it also rained.

Just like now, the rain was pouring down.

[scoriarose]

She heard me doing things so she came up to the side of her baby bin and blelelelele'd at me until I noticed her. She greets me every morning where we spend the first hour of every day together, her just resting in my hand and me holding her, often gently petting her head and tiny scales. If there is a heaven, that first hour we spend together is it.

She is getting a larger enclosure for her birthday in a month and a half. :D Hopefully I can get it done in time, as I haven't sculpted a custom enclosure before and will be trying some new artistic critiques. I do have experience sculpting though. My biggest worry is the paints and sealing them properly! Art I can do- but food safe art that will be in a moist bioactive enclosure is new for me.

[wutheringmights]

also i really shouldn't have written stp because now i have a million ideas for spirit's adventures in new hyrule that I will never have time to actually write :((

[angy-grrr]

I don’t get why ppl keep saying bkdk is dead or Horikoshi broke off bkdk. If that were true, this extra would look very different as you pointed out multiple times. The extra was still heavily focused on them and I hate how ppl are letting one no dictate the entire relationship. Izuku asks him to be a special lecturer too. I think the no just needs more clarification but other than that it is mostly fine. If a ship were to be shut down by the creator, it would look very different. Same logic for if a ship were to be canon, it would look different than what we got in the end for izu///ocha. This extra was bad in different ways from ships. It was just a whole lot of nothing that doesn’t meaningfully add anything to the story but I guess we shouldn’t be surprised since it is an extra. It is still an ambiguous ending that can be pretty fixable by one shots by Horikoshi in the future or even better by fanfiction lol. Except for the Toga part. That is just inexcusable

himiko-chan :(

and yeah! like even tho 431 is terrible not only for pairs but also for the whole story, it only confirmed Katsuki feels something really strong for deku and he doesnt notice bc he doesnt consider himself to be that great; they keep talking, and they keep being in each other's lives with no problem -they also imply they will work on communicating their feelings, as the special lecture is about this topic and deku also thinks katsuki doesnt see himself in a high regard. This is actually something that could be used in the future, as their relationship and arc isnt completely finished -in the way that they arent at a point of no miscommunication, no yearning, etc. They still need something to work with in regards to themselves and each other in the process. When it comes to midoriya and uraraka, idk what exactly could develop from what 431 tell us -seems to be mostly about paying attention to the ppl in your life instead of just letting life happen I guess? But idk what conversation or arc they could have together that wasn't resolved already, it was a really weird choice to focus on them as if there needs to be more explored -which is why choosing to not make them talk to each other nor think of the other in these years is potentially interesting, like the only way they could actually need to talk things up or have a separated special moment is if they just stop being friends and want to talk more from now on. Like, if they kept their friendship these years and were part of the other's life, there wouldnt be a moment like this at all.

I think it hurt mostly ochako -and deku if we interpret it as "deku just wants to be teacher, he is super happy about it, and loveeees so much his ex bestie after 8 years of no contact and never thinking about her"-, more than the bkdk relationship.

It would be interesting to see those one shots, if he does them -I know he said he wanted to do more things and little drawings and content for it, but idk if he will do something elaborate or just one page of something silly. I think he still has to opportunity of working with the material and make something at least not this bad -or completely ignore 431 and just continue with their adventures like 430 implies lol If he wants to double down with the "romance" I have no idea how he could do it with what he has tbh, unless he just ignores the plot and their personalities.

[abrahamvanhelsings]

imagining the things graham gore could and would have done to edward little's cervix had he lived a little longer

[puppppppppy]

i wanna post my skip to loafer art but i cant do it knowing ppl are gonna put it on tiktok and pinterest bc itd be like. bringing an invasive species ykwim

[eggs-can-draw]

Toddlers who say slurs