#they live rent free in my head and can stay there

[ashidaii]

there's a fantasy au living rent free in my head rn

tldr viktor, a mage, saves himself from death by frowned upon transmogrification magic (turning himself into the herald) he stays safe in society by using magic to look human, but its very taxing and he can only hold the form for so long each day

jayce is a knight who hunts monsters

[things-arent-what-they-seem66]

Val: FUCK!!

Adam ignored him and held the phone to his ear: Yeah, is this the miserable cunt that can't leave Lu alone?

Lilith gripped the phone tightly: And who might this be? Adam right? I've heard you're wasting your time on my husband.~

She even sounded like a cold heartless bitch.

Adam: He's not your fucking husband anymore bitch. You and all the other pathetic little shits need to get a fucking life and leave him the fuck alone!

Lilith scoffed: Oh please, I'm just making sure he stays in his place.

Adam growled: Stay away from him. This is your only warning bitch or else.

Lilith: You wouldn't hit a woman.

Adam: No, but I'd hit a demon like you.

Lilith cackled: Oh, so you want my leftovers so fucking badly? You can have him for now.~ But I'll tell you this Adam, no matter how hard you try I'll still be living in his head rent free. You should have just left the King in his Castle to rot.~

Adam: Stay. Away. From. Him.

He snarled and threw the phone at the sniveling man on the ground. When Adam turned back to Lucifer he softened, the poor man was shaking his good leg brought to his chest with his face buried in it.

Adam went over and gently touched his shoulder making Lucifer jump.

Adam: It's just me Lu.

Lucifer looked up with tearful eyes: I-I-I wanna go.......

Adam: Are you sure?

Val: Yeah go home!

Adam glared at him: SHUT YOUR MOUTH ASS HAIR!!

Adam turned back to Lucifer and tried calming him down.

It's not safe here.

You're not safe here.

SHE'S GOING TO FIND YOU!!

Lucifer: Y-yeah I want to go home..... It's getting late, w-we should get lunch.....

Adam sighed and smoothed his hair, he scooped Lucifer up in his arms and carried him home.

Val: That's right! Take the princessa back to her tower!!

If Adam hadn't of been holding Lucifer he would went back to beat that guys ugly face in.

-

Lucifer was curled up on Adams lap, a blanket over the pair of them with the tv on something calming.

Adam: You did so well today Lu.

Lucifer sniffed: W-Why can't she just leave me alone.........

Trapped Heart

@beef-brisket

⚠️This deals with Agoraphobia, anxiety, depression, and mentions of domestic abuse ⚠️

-

Adam: Well that's the last of them.

He looked around his new home and smiled, this place was so much better than his last home and a third of the price too.

They were practically giving it away.

There was his lawn mower that was on the truck still.

Adam went out to put it in the garage when he noticed his neighbor, a short blonde man getting his mail from his box. He was better looking than his last neighbor.

Adam waved: Hey!

Lucifer jumped as he grasped his mail, he looked over and saw a handsome brunette standing in the driveway across the road smiling and waving.

Lucifer: O-Oh, hi!

Adam: Names Adam, I just moved in.

Lucifer: N-nice to meet you! I'm Lucifer, I hope you like it here.

He wanted to be polite and welcome his new neighbor right, but he could already feel the cold tendrils of anxiety start to slowly crawl through his skin trying to wrap around him like a vice grip.

How long has he been outside? His heart started to beat a little hard with each moment he's not back in his home. He could die! He's not safe he needs to get back!

Adam: Yeah me too.

By the looks of it he already likes what he sees.

Lucifer nodded, he could feel the tremors starting in his hands the palms getting sweaty.

He needs to go.

Lucifer: I-It was nice to meet you Adam! B-But I need to get going.

Adam: Oh okay, maybe we can hang out sometime?

Lucifer gave a tight smile: Y-yeah.

He waved again to be polite and tried not to run back to his house, his therapist said it was good for him to be out as long as he could stand it.

Pushing himself a little each day. Today him reached his limit.

Once his front door was closed and locked behind relief washed over him, he's safe now nothing can hurt him. He hugged his mail to his chest, he needed to sit down.

Lucifer went over and placed everything on the coffee table. He tried to remember his breathing exercises.

Adam seemed very nice, maybe he'll send Charlie over when she comes to give him a proper greeting.

-

Adam tilted his head as he watched his new neighbor go into his home, if he didn't know any better he would say the man was panicked. Did he do something? He knows his personality can be a little brash at times but he thought he was being polite.

A man that lived beside him came out for his mail as well.

Adam: Hi! Umm, I'm new here.

Alastor: Oh hello! I'm Alastor, I guess that makes us neighbors.

Adam chuckled: Guess so. Umm, if I may ask, is the man that lives there okay? I didn't intend to upset him.

Alastor looked over at Lucifer's home and rolled his eyes.

Alastor: Getting the mail was he? Don't worry about it that man's afraid of his own shadow. I wouldn't waste my time, he never leaves his house.

Well that sounded a little dramatic.

Adam: What?

Alastor leaned on the fence: Oh yeah, Mr. Morgenstern over there never leaves his house. Rumor has it that his wife used to beat the fuck out of him in the home but it was worse when they were in public. Apparently she'd just humiliate him and others would join in making things worse. He was never free of her but at least in the home he could be alone.

Adam was horrified to hear that: Dude, the fuck, is that true?

Alastor shrugged: Not sure. All I know that is true is she left him nearly 8 years ago and he's become some kind of hermit that never leaves the damn house. His daughter Charlie, sweet girl you'll likely meet her, comes over from time to time.

Adam looked over at Lucifer's house, that couldn't all be true right? Maybe some was and the rest is telephone gossip extras?

Him and Alastor parted ways, he had to put everything away in his house. All the while his mind kept going back to the handsome neighbor across the way.

[bekkomi]

What are you looking at?

[kurthummeldeservesbetter]

I've been thinking more about a Jayce joins the commune but the commune is just weird, not evil, AU and it gets funnier every time.

In this universe, pretty much all the adults are super into Viktor (save for the ones who could care less about the romantic/sexual drama of it all, they just want to grow their peaches and get healthcare) and are downright pissed Jayce came in and was like. Yeah sorry. I stole y'all's man. Oops! (He isn't sorry)

Salo is the number 1 Jayce hater. He'd been trying (and failing) to get into Viktor's pants for years, even before Jayce came on the scene with Hextech, and when he thought he finally had a chance he came back even hotter and clingier than ever and Viktor ate it up.

Huck, second in command (third or fourth depending on what they think of Sky and Jayce's role in the commune) is so tired. He finally has purpose and everyone is infighting about the Herald's man. He's trying to keep them on track. (It's not working lmao).

EVERYONE knows when Vik and Jayce are getting it on. Not because Viktor tells them via mind-hive, but because his presence is suddenly gone. Salo gets even angrier.

Vander, resident sane wolf-man, is very unamused by all this. He has to deal with being a wolf, he shouldn't have to deal with the fact his neighbors want to bone the landlord and can't cause the smelly man with a beard and giant butterfly hammer is.

It's even worse that Jayce is good at everything. He sketches photos of the Herald that even their best artist is jealous of. He helps grow the plants in the greenhouse. Jayce sets up trades with the firelights. Jayce gets to touch the herald and no one else can.

Viktor is doing Yoga outside his home and sometimes people stop and watch, only for Jayce to come back from an early blacksmithing job and start yoga with Viktor, blocking their view. Did he do it on purpose? They don't know. (He did).

They're also so confused because he's the one member (besides the pink-haired girl and her blue-haired sisters who visit and chill with Vander) who isn't a part of their hivemind.

Also in my mind, he and Jayce are equals here. Jayce is in charge of defense and casual activities, blacksmithing, Viktor is the healer and ya know. deity. But they work best as partners and now everyone has to deal with the fact the guy they all hate for taking their herald is also in charge, in a way.

(He teaches them better was to make homes in the blacksmithing area and theyre all mad cause he's right)

[tobbesdiscordkitten]

ᴀxʟ ʀᴏꜱᴇ - ᴘᴀʀᴀᴅɪꜱᴇ ᴄɪᴛʏ

“𝙸 𝚖𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚋𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚜𝚒𝚗’ 𝚖𝚢 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍.”

“𝙰𝚛𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚋𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚍?”

[sunbloomdew]

he's not fooling anyone

the og meme

[kitsunesakii]

Will these get colored???

Psh. Like I should know

[tightjeansjavi]

the lore for pornstar!joel runs so so so deep 🥺 my mans just wants to be loved

-

I volunteer

[mushyfart]

I've been drawing tlrg nonstop for 2 days I don't know what in gods name happened but I can't stop drawing TLRG I LOVE TLRG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM LIKE SPEED

I have so much art to post so im gonna post them all one by one

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hello

You spark joy

That is all

Good day

Marie Kondo can’t get rid of me now

[koifsssh]

a small gift for @cookie-catcoon !

oh... i cant seem to get them out of my head... he would try to learn spanish, i think. He wants to be able to communicate with all of his friends, of course!

I do think he'd be successful, he'd probably sound a little funny until he's developed his accent. (i know it took me a while...)

he's not very good at expressing how he feels about anything to be frank with you... so he probably speaks through flowers and small thoughtful little gifts... (most likely needs help from julie when it comes to flowers! bahaha!)

[ translation! : "Ah... um... th-this flower reminded me of you..."

"For me?" ]

I adore them both so much... bah!

[taylor]

still reeling over the fact that almost 2 months ago the guy i was talking to (not dating, but definitely 'seeing') took another girl TO MY AND MY ROOMMATE'S APARTMENT to FUCK HER ON OUR AIR MATTRESS while i was ON VACATION THOUSANDS OF MILES AWAY

honestly. how do i get myself into these situations

[nthflower]

I can't beat the fucking Roblox fish game 😭 I keep dying on the ridge 😭

[lenievi]

ok, so uhm, I was walking the dog and had an idea (blame the hot weather at 11pm)

a year ago I had a one day long phase where I was like Farragut AU with Kirk/La’an and McCoy/T’Pring, and I’m low-key back on that nonsense

because!

McCoy and Sevet. Imagine McCoy meeting T’Pring’s father. 

“Jim, a smiling Vulcan?”

this is even better than McCoy&Sarek (blasphemy!)

McCoy and Sevet visiting various restaurants and just getting along nicely, and McCoy teaching him a lot of weird human traditions. 

[staycalmandhugaclone]

Thunderstorm woke me up at an ungodly hour, so, of course, I'm contemplating the usual things: how far away the lightning is, how few hours remain before my alarm goes off, if it's really just a bit too silly to use Crosshair's shoulder stabby mount as an IV hook in my current WIP....

[greetings-inferiors]

There was a workshop that I really wanted to go to but I mixed up the times and thought it was at 2 instead of 1, so I arrived as they were leaving. And it’s not happening again for another 3 weeks I’m pretty sure ;^; now I’m getting that coke to ease my sorrows