#they have zero idea what theyre actually standing for

[nururu]

Everyone's mad at that Brittney broski girl but...... She's right. It IS dystopian to ask some white tiktoker to use her podcast to talk about genocide. And the reaction to her saying she's not the one for that job, people making it online cancel culture discourse bc this white woman who makes poop jokes doesn't think she should be the spokesperson, is just even more dystopian. This girl is RIGHT. Y'all co opt these tragedies and are opportunists and just TALK AND TALK AND TALK AND TALK SOOOOOOOOO MUCH that the actual victims never get a voice. Never get heard. Never get the stage or the platform or mic. And WHITE PPL, THEIR ABUSERS, BECOME THEIR VOICES. PRIVILEGED PPL WHO NEVER FACED GENOCIDE GET TO BE THEIR SPOKESPERSON. do you understand how infuriating it was when non indigenous folks jumped on the bandwagon for like 2 months a couple years ago, and ALLLLLLL the indigenous voices got silenced, and NONE OF THEM were promoted or platformed or given the mic, and then we had ignorant Non indigenous ppl speak FOR us while having no clue what the fuck they were even talking about and it did WAYYYYYYYYYYYYY more harm than good. A lot of y'all need to realize you're opportunists, and you only care because you're self centered and can make everything about yourself (while deluding yourself and manipulating others into thinking that's not the case) and God forbid you have to shut the fuck up for 2 seconds and amplify an actual victims voice for once.

[sammygender]

thoughts on how the sam & dean part of the fight before sam left for stanford went !

i am addicted to thinking about precanon so thank you for this <33

i think people r generally way too optimistic about how that initial seperation between them went. dean is awful to sam about stanford even years after he left and years after he came back!! hes still very visibly angry about it in s5 which is NINE YEARS after he left in the first place and refuses to even tolerate the idea it was a good moment for sam. i cannot comprehend how people think 22 year old dean had the emotional maturity to even let sam go without a fight, nevermind be supportive about it.

like. theres this amazinggg art on here of sam hitchhiking to stanford and all the comments are like 'erm that black eye would be from JOHN actually!' (side note but it is so funny to me how spn fans decide john hit them based on implication (which i agree w... to an extent...) but dean hitting sam onscreen multiple times somehow translates to 'DEAN WOULD NEVER DO THAT'. erm. okay.) 'nooo dean would've given sam a lift!'

and like. what show are you watching. if dean would've given sam a lift he would've done it to the bus station in moody silence and then locked the doors of the impala so sam couldn't get out to catch his bus to stanford and they would've started physically fighting for the car keys and dean eventually wouldve let sam get them and sam wouldve left. or something. but it would not be some sweet brotherly moment bc that directly contradicts canon <3

i do think the worst of the fight is between sam & john - that's always what's implied in canon - and in my head dean's just standing there stonefaced maybe refusing to even talk to sam until theyre left alone somehow and he breaks. but i also think dean hits sam at some point, will always have the image in my head of sam showing up to stanford w a bloody nose and fending off questions. (internally hes like no my dad didnt do this it was my brother so its fine. <3.) theres a scene like this in one of my fics so im just drawing from that. but. like....

idk how dean/john finds out. if dean found out before john, i think dean probably wouldve run to him about it in an attempt to get sam Not To Go as much as it would be nice if he didnt, so i reckon they have to find out at about the same time. i think sam is unsure what to expect from dean, who of course (as far as we see both in flashbacks and in canon) alternates between genuine care and support and angry, desperate possessiveness. he probably hopes for the best and expects the worst and gets the worst.

there r definitely lots of different ways it could go....maybe sam tells dean and dean tells john. maybe sam tells john without telling dean at all and thats how dean finds out which totally wrecks him. maybe sam tells them both at the same time. maybe sam never tells them and they find the acceptance letter. this is why stanford fight is sooo fascinating. i feel like i could write five different versions of it and all would be possible/interesting.

but whichever way, i just dont see dean as contradicting john. he generally Doesnt Ever precanon, this is established, he admits it himself, thats why its such a huge moment when he defends sam at the end of s1.....sam going on about dean 'protecting him' is 1. more subtle and probably to do with dean being the one to shoulder most of johns emotional baggage than the heller misinterpretation of 'john hit dean but not sam and thats what this means!!!' (tho i am sure dean did genuinely Protect sam sometimes including from physical violence. of course he did. this isnt to discredit that..i just emphasise the Sometimes.). and 2. partially just classic Sam Rewriting History (u always protected me from dad, from lucifer....girl he did those things very little certainly not always. know your worth sam winchester).

so if dean gives sam a very angry lift (to a nearby bus station...there is absolutely zero fucking way hes driving him to stanford and tbh i already find this quite unlikely but possibilities r interesting) its on john's say-so or at least not disapproval. which like. sure maybe. john certainly is concerned about sam's safety even after he kicks him out, checking up on him at stanford etc, id believe that hed want to ensure sam Gets there even if the fight ended up so bad he told sam he couldnt come back. tho hes stubborn and i dont think hed say it. so maybe itd be a case of dean kind of picking up that that's what john wants and complying even though right now half of him wants to never see sam again and the other half wants to tie him to the radiator so he can never leave. sorry i am literally brainstorming fic ideas in this ask answer now.

anyway....SORRY id say long ass answer as always but this is actually INSANELY long......sorry guys im about to embark upon getting tested for adhd and maybe then my rambles will be, while not shorter in length, more cohesive? tldr fandom is wrong dean is an absolute ASS during stanford fight. obviously sam leaving devastates him and how does dean cope with devastation or perceived abandonment do we think?? hm?? he is just as angry as john for the same and different reasons. and thats really so much more interesting than him being Secretly Supportive. <3

[techlove-1999]

ok, so… securitrons move around with One Big Tire. while it gives their design a pretty memorable Staple, its… well, realistically it would be TERRIBLE 4 balance…!!! while a big tire like that on its Own could probably balance just fine, we of course have a Big (Cute) Bulky Robot that’s gonna be Fucking with its Center of Mass, kind of like a heavy unicycle!! so i have 2 wonder how they do it so well ingame…!! obviously it could be explained through cartoon physics or something like that… but i wanna dig a bit Deeper than that. i love securitrons too much 2 just write it off anyhow…^_^ so lets solve the mystery of how these things can balance so good!!!

now.. it could be that securitrons are specifically coded 2 know how 2 Balance themselves, or have some kind of mechanic that keeps them from Toppling Over every time they want 2 stop moving or stay Still. it could be possible that they have a sort of special Locking Mechanism that keeps their tire from making them roll away…? however this does Not solve the problem of the robot’s center of mass!! because even if the tire is locked in place, the Weight of the securitron’s body will still, well… make it tip over!!

so i propose an Idea. what if the securitrons center of mass. is actually a lot Lower than it may seem from their build. stay with me here, ok…? ok…

obviously house is too much of a Haughty Smarty Pants or something like that 2 just have written off or ignore this issue. in fact- the way securitrons ingame can effortlessly balance is a testament 2 this fact!! so what did he do 2 let the securitrons actually balance…?

its is My Opinion that securitrons must have their center of mass Lower in their bodies. this would make it Much easier 4 them 2 actually balance themselves as we see in new vegas!! if i had 2 guess where Specifically, i’d say somewhere as shown in This Simple Graphic…

since the part housing the Screen is the bulkiest part of the chassis, you would Typically expect that 2 be the center of mass… however, with it being So High Up on the body, it would cause the robot 2 fall over!!! crash!!! ow!!! @_@

however… if the center of mass is Below that part, in the “waist” area per se, then the robot won’t have as much of a discrepancy in weight distribution. it wont be as Top Heavy, allowing the entire machine 2 stay standing!!

now as 4 How exactly the center of weight would realistically be in the waist area, i’d have 2 say its probably something 2 do with how the Functions of the parts affect how theyd be Built, if that makes any sense... the lower waist area is where the Wheel connects 2 the rest of the body, so the part where it connects is most likely More Fortified so it doesn’t Come Apart, especially considering the amount of Movement that part would have 2 put up with, so it should there4 be using Stronger/More Material so it doesn’t Wear Down so easily. perhaps the material in that area is pretty thick, making it heavy!!

as 4 the part Above that however… we can see its made up of the same material as the Arms, and from securitron movement and idle animations, we see its somewhat Flexible from the way it Bounces!! perhaps theres a comically large spring inside? or perhaps a multitude of springs that allow the chassis 2 Bounce in the way it does? (leaving that outside bit as the only thing letting it bounce would be a bit Stupid, really… there would be Zero support 4 the chassis and it would just always be Crushing the thing…!!!) so perhaps those springs are quite heavy, as they’d have 2 be Strong and there4 pretty Big and Thick so they dont snap inside of the body!

of course this is all just Speculation, as we dont 4 sure know what the inside of one of these cuties looks like. maybe one day we’ll get a good look at the inner workings of a securitron, but until we know that, all we have 2 rely on is the power of Headcanon!! so i could be spot on, or i could be way off. who knows!! maybe theyre powered by cartoon bullshittery 4 real!!!

id really love 2 hear Other People’s ideas and thoughts on this too… i am not an Expert on Robotics by a Long Shot, even if i do love them with my Whole Heart… im just some sillyguy giving its two cents on a cute robot!! so if anyone has different or cooler interpretations on how securitrons can balance, i would love 2 hear them!!

also… thank you 4 reading my speculations as well in the First Place… it honestly means a Whole Lot 2 me whenever people enjoy the stuff i put out here 4 fun, so thank you thank you Thank You 4 taking the time 2 enjoy my silly little works...!!! (seriously everyone leaves the sweetest stuff in the tags and it makes me want 2 Cry Tears Of Joy. who let you all be so kind and wonderful.)

[the-s1lly-corner]

may we please request gn porcelain doll!reader whos on the verge of abstraction (but has zero idea how to stop it and is afraid to admit it) x jax and maybe pomni (separate) ? ot I love how canon your writing is !! have an amazing day/night :3

Jax and Pomni x porcelain doll!reader whos abstracting !

cracks my knuckles. a TADC angst request? dont mind if i do eheheheh! and ueueueueu thank you anon! i gotta admit im really self conscious about writing characters, doesnt matter how long ive been writing them i always feel that i could do better with their characterization... but im so so happy to know that theyre not too OOC!! that means a lot!! got a little too silly on jaxs part so its longer than pomnis i hope thats okay!!

POMNI:

gosh imagine this is the first time shes seen someone actively abstract... like yeah sure shes seen kaufmo in his abstracted form, but seeing the aftermath/complete transformation is totally different than being there in the moment. i think she would.. be all over the place. i mean youre at your worst and you dont even understand whats going on... and pomni doesnt know what to do or what she can do to ground you. can you even be grounded back to the present moment? can you even back up and regain yourself? is that something someone can do? i think her panic makes you panic, which ends up making your.. situation worse.. i think pomni would try to keep you together as best as she can; physically and mentally. i got the image of the readers face cracking open and the abstraction stuff peeking out and pomni just... trying to push the pieces back together... its a horrible situation, and before long you're fully abstracted and pomni just stands there. im not even sure if she would have the mind to run away, probably too caught up in trying to bring you back to her.. i think sometimes she would stop in front of your old bedroom door and just. stare at the brand new red X over your portrait

JAX:

unlike pomni, i think he can more easily catch the signs of someone abstracting, though i dont think hes seen someone actually lose themselves right in front of him and transform right there... hmm... but unless you and him are very close i dont think he would bother trying to check in on you. i mean, if youre not, why would he? but... lets say youre both friends, or even partners, and he notices that youve been acting off.. i think it would still take him a little longer than id like to admit for him to actually come to your room to check in on you. perhaps he wants to give you space, or feels youre just going through something and thats your business, or maybe he didnt feel obligated to ask how youre doing as horrible as it sounds (i feel this is more likely if you guys are just friends, though, perhaps not close but still friendly with one another).. gets tipped off that something is wrong when he sees a stray (and glitching) piece of porcelain on the ground... which turns into two pieces, then three. a trail, leading right to your breaking form. i think at first he would think its some joke, before realizing that this is actually happening. unfortunately, i dont think jax is the best comforter so even in your last moments of being conscious and aware would still be spent in fear and confusion.. but at least theres an attempt to try to help you, right? i think jax would actually try to call for help, at least he might be able to admit hes unqualified to help you.. but regardless of if anyone hears him its too late for you.. i like to think he keeps some of your porcelain shards, on the off chance theyre still hanging around even after youre sent to the cellar

[faelapis]

so i watch wwdits. and i gotta say. that was the worst episode i've ever seen of not just this show, but maybe any show. ever. wow. i'm actually impressed with how bad it was.

i'm considering doing a more serious dissection of how Not to do a character arc or narrative framing. but for now, let me just share some general thoughts:

undoing guillermos vampirism totally shits on his character arc of standing up for himself and taking what he wants regardless of the morality of it. i hate it and it sucks.

also, the reasons make no sense. guillermo has had zero problem killing people until now. the roundabout way they try to explain it, like wow, he could smell someone's shampoo and imagined him picking it out and felt their mutual humanity... why would that not apply to any of the other people he's killed? he's even had somewhat of a relationship with some of them. yet all he's ever done when they die is give a distressed frown AT MOST.

guillermo is a killer and always has been. lately, he's even proud of it. that has, metaphorically, been part of him "embracing who he is."

but what bothered me even more was nandor. we all know this situation (guillermo being turned by someone else) is his fault for neglecting turning guillermo for 13 years... but instead, everything is framed as guillermos own fault for having someone else turn him. like - look at how mad you made nandor, guillermo. look what you've caused, guillermo. look what you made him do.

which, yikes. i feel like i dont need to say how bad that is.

even worse than nandors jealous rage.... i really hate the stupid condescending "forgiveness" afterwards. thats actually worse. like guillermo was right to be meek and apologetic for this, like it IS something he needs to be forgiven for. but its "okay" now because nandor "forgave" him. lets just move on. no need to interrogate nandors entitlement over guillermo.

you can argue theres the unstated idea that nandor is overreacting. sure. we, the audience, dont want guillermo to die, and thats part of the irreverent way the show treats death and killing.

but still, yknow?

i feel like i'm taking crazy pills, because the real question isnt whether nandor should "forgive" guillermo. in this context, guillermo has done nothing wrong. nandor totally reneged on their agreement as vampire-familiar. guillermo is supposed to serve nandor, and in return, nandor is supposed to turn guillermo. but he keeps not doing it, and in general being shitty towards guillermo. so guillermo takes matters into his own hands.

that COULD be a great character beat. it could confront nandor with his selfishness, and this uneven power relationship where he gets guillermo to stay by not fulfilling his promise.

but the question of whether guillermo should forgive nandor for not turning him, or for throwing a fit when someone else does? not even brought up. even though that really seems like the most pressing question. its crazy how subservient and apologetic guillermo suddenly is, like its S1 all over again. he does some token yelling at nandor, but his primary emotion is clearly guilt. its not enough to remotely change the shitty framing.

look. this show doesnt exactly have much "morality", and i dont want it to. i dont want any of these guys to become upstanding citizens. i like the irreverent tone and how theyre all killers.

but i do care about character arcs and agency.

guillermo has been treated like hes inferior the whole time hes been a familiar. and hes put up with it because he wanted to be a vampire. so by becoming a vampire, he forces the relationship to become equal. he also finally gets what he wants. which is ESPECIALLY poignant when it happens regardless of what nandor wants. it takes back his own agency over the situation, because nandor CAN'T hold it over his head anymore.

and then nandor doesnt like it. and goes into a murderous rage because of own entitlement at being the one to turn guillermo. thats fine as a starting point to a character arc, but guillermo doesn't even stand up for himself. he doesnt fight back as he should - or really, would, given how he's evolved to be more assertive. and then its reinforced by the stupid "forgiveness", like nandor has any right to forgive someone who did nothing wrong. it sets up this convenient scenario where nandor is not confronted for being a shitty master, but guillermo IS confronted for taking control of his own life.

and now, just as conveniently, guillermo just... doesnt like being a vampire, either. so nandor gets to further be a "good friend" making amends by helping "unturn" him. all framed like its about guillermo finding out what he "really" wants.

this is lame and it sucks. not only because guillermos reasons make no sense (again, he's been a killer this whole time? if anything, his arc is more accepting his own lack of morality), but because it resets the chessboard in a way where nandor doesnt have to learn anything.

nandor doesnt have to confront the sting of guillermo having agency to make this choice without him. he doesnt have to deal with the fact that it never got to be him who turns guillermo. he doesnt have to be forcibly confronted with the fact that he now has to treat guillermo as an equal, because guillermo now doesn't need anything from him.

and it sucks because all that could actually be a great jumping off point for them to, despite everything, start a real relationship. maybe even a romantic one. they could mutually realize they actually care about each other. regardless of this pact.

and you can say that by guillermo deciding to be human (as extremely lame and deeply uncool as that is), it also gives them this "equality." because he would stay with the vampires because he wants to, not because he needs something from nandor.

but you're missing the point - its NANDOR who needs to learn. its HE who needs to be confronted by guillermo making his own choices.

so guillermo just... conveniently changing his mind because he was a full vampire for one (1) fucking day and suddenly decided he's too good to kill people?

it robs nandor of that entire arc. and no, i'm not counting his stupid "forgiving" guillermo as learning to treat him like an equal. that would require a lot more introspection about his own entitlement. that would require him to actually say with his chest that guillermo had every right to make this choice, and its not on nandor to forgive him, its on guillermo whether he would forgive nandor.

that doesn't happen. what actually happens is nandor decides to show guillermo "mercy," which, again, firmly places the agency in nandor's hands. at no point does he have to be vulnerable and accept that guillermo might not want to be with him. at no point does he have to introspect about how he's treated him this whole time.

also. there is a long, proud line in patriarchal thinking of husbands "forgiving" their wives for perceived "disobedience," which only reinforces the husband as the head of the household and that said wives "should" have been more obedient. forgiveness is not always an act of kindness. sometimes it's very condescending. which it is here.

(same for the interpretation i've seen from some, that nandor "always knew" guillermo wasn't cut out to be a vampire. like that's why he didn't turn him. what a horrible, condescending idea. i don't know how you can look at nandor being like "i'm not going to give you what you want, because i know better than you" and not think it's shit.)

yes, i'm aware of the cheating metaphor. but its a bad metaphor. at least, not without acknowledging that its been an unequal relationship for 13 years where one partner has been neglecting the other constantly. at that point, the nuance should really come out and maybe the partner "cheating" isnt the worst here.

but that doesn't happen.

also... it's just a bad episode. like. in general. like the whole thing with the guide, where you think she actually gets to assert herself? sounds great. too bad its totally undone by gaslighting her into thinking they do like her and are nice to her. like the problem is they just didnt verbalize that "enough." thats yet another bullied or ignored character whose arc of standing up for themselves (even by immoral means, because its an immoral fantasy show) is undercut.

it sucks. guillermo sucks for losing his defiant streak (and metaphorical empowerment through vampirism), nandor sucks for being entitled. this whole show sucks. i suck for bothering to stick with it so long. i'm done. i'm out.

[mqole]

hbjhkgvhj ok here are uh. some character designs i did abt a year ago

these are all based on the incredible @kayzero's fic zero win game, which is a rewrite of ztd with akane as the protagonist, and it has possibly THE BEST characterization of akane ive ever read- listen just. just go read it you will be enriched i promise.

im not putting an image description bc i dont know where to start (sorry!!) BUT ill put a bunch of character design notes below the cut for people who are insane like me <3333

ok first of all. i know when i sent these to kay the other day they said there were some details canon to zwg that i missed (akane's lil hoodie pocket, aoi wearing white to contrast junpei's black (which is SO inspired btw.)) so just. PRETEND those are there bc i forgor <3

i spent the most time on sigma, phi, akane, junpei and aoi just because they've had multiple iterations of designs. it was fun to take bits and pieces from each version of them, so thats why they get a feature page

you can see a lot of my little pink notes with criticisms of the ztd designs there. in general, i really dont like the ztd designs, they all feel unnaturally bland to me (although thats probably also the artstyle).

most people whove looked into the colour symbolism in zero escape are probably familiar with the whole red/blue thing: that is, theyre colours representing the morphogenetic field. akane and aoi are the most obvious examples of this. 'aka' means red, and 'ao' means blue. in the first nonary game, akane and clover wear red - the colour for transmitters - and aoi and light wear blue, the colour for recievers. in 999 proper, akane wears purple, to symbolise how she can recieve AND transmit, while junpei wears red and blue by themselves. you can do a whole analysis of these colours and i will not put it here thats a whole SEPERATE post

anyway! the actual designs!! i'll start with sigma. i wanted to reconcile his vlr design with zero ii's design, and initially i planned on giving him a coat, but it didnt really have a nice silhouette, so i ditched that idea. instead, i turned his jumpsuit from vlr into a polo shirt - much like what he has in ztd - and gave him some zero-y accessories: the white turtleneck, the belt and the gloves all come from zero's design. once id included the white turtleneck, making the pants white felt really logical. in character design, its generally best to limit the palette of colours as much as you can, so it was a good excuse to reuse a colour while also paying homage to his ztd design. i also cut his hair bc hes a scientist and he'd do that.

phi's design is a lot more like her vlr one than her ztd design. the blue coat was her hallmark accessory, and im shocked that they ditched it for ztd, so i gave it back - along with her boots and hair accessory. i kept her pants and glasses from ztd, as well as the way the bottom of her shirt is tucked into her pants. they just have a much nicer silhouette to me. between my first pass of colours and my second pass, phi's colours changed the most - i realised i had too many blue guys in the lineup, and wanted to make the colours stand out individually. so i leaned into phi's orange-ness. giving her hair accessory, pants and boots an orange hue instead of a blue one, as well as shifting her coat to a more teal colour really helped make those colours pop.

AKANE MY BESTIE!!!! her design was probably the one i had the most fun with. i basically just took her ztd design and purpled it. I did want to include some more details though - her neck scarf was in both her 999 AND vlr design, so it felt wrong not to include it. i also added some gold highlights to her design, just to complement the purple - her boots are also toned yellow, so it felt fitting. the cut of her sleeves, as well as her hair, felt really natural: i gave her the side ponytail from ztd, while letting more of her hair fall to the side to retain her silhouette from 999. i stole the sleeves wholesale from vlr akane, but can you blame me. look at that robe. its so pretty.

overall i have mixed feelings on ztd junpei as a character, but i think his darker turn is at the very least a fun direction to take him. I do like the jacket he has in his concept art. IT SURE WOULD BE NICE IF THE MODEL ALSO HAD A JACKET. his design went relatively unchanged overall, i basically just retoned his hair, gave him a button-up instead of a t-shirt, and puffered his jacket. the red and blue from his vest in 999 is reused here, but in darker, more muted tones. you can see in the corner of the drawing i played around with swapping the red and blue, but the red focus felt too edgy for junpei. the blue also pops really nicely against his dark clothes, so i kept it.

anyone who has spoken to me for more than ten seconds will know how insane i am about aoi kurashiki i mean come on my name is santa. i think a lot about his two designs: that of the first nonary game and in 999. in the first nonary game he wears a blue scarf, harkening to his role as a reciever, but in 999 he wears monochrome. my personal interpretation of this is that his 999 fit was him purposefully disguising his connection to the morphogenetic field. so post-999, since he doesnt have to worry about that, i gave him his blue back!!! his general fit is the same- his pants and shoes are artistry so obviously i kept those, and i ended up making the rest of his look black to contrast his 999 design. if i were to redesign him now wearing white, id probably go a different direction altogether. that third little drawing ive included has some test outfits for him, carlos, and maria, but i never really went anywhere with them. also i gave him dark roots to show his relation to akane a bit more. and also because i like projecting my roots always grow back SO fast

that brings us to the 4 characters introduced after vlr: carlos, mira, diana, and... maria??? yeah like i said go read zero win game. do it. maria is such a fun character. she was, coincidentally, ALSO the only character where i had to design someone from scratch. you can see i fiddled a little with colour palettes, trying to figure out how to give every character a unique look. diana and carlos' designs actually go almost unchanged here- i think dianas design in particular is actually pretty great, and works as a nice foil to luna in vlr. carlos is just kind of normal. he can have his silly polo shirt.

miras ztd design is. ugh ok look its FINE but i hate the boobie designs in zero escape because they always feel like they were designed seperately from the character. mira in zwg is still a sussy baka, but she's a lot more cordial- i enjoyed seeing her more as a snake lying in the grass. I ended up giving her green because its a fun colour to give characters who youre meant to distrust. SO MANY TIMES reading zwg i was like "oh maybe mira's chill - oh wait maybe shes not - oh wait maybe shes chill again" and i love her for that honestly. she still gets boobies because i love women but i gave her a fun little long sleeved corset top. the amount of skin she shows directly correlates to the amount you should trust her (i am only half joking.)

i wont talk about diana because honestly the only change i made was giving her a little blue strip at the bottom of her skirt, but i'll talk about maria and carlos together. carlos i kept as a little pink boy because i love him and i love pink and listen its my character design ill do what i want. maria in ztd AND in zwg experiences reverie syndrome, which is connected to the morphogenetic field. her and carlos' designs both incorporate red and blue again- (just realised diana also has red and blue. pretend that was intentional) -to show their connection to the field. yes yes i know its pink but listen its red enough. like aoi, i gave maria and carlos both different iterations of their designs. i'm less sold on carlos', but i did actually like the baggier, heavy designs for maria. with those ones she looks more depressed than she does wearing overalls, so im calling that a win. maria's was the design i was least satisfied with overall, but hey i did these like a year and a half ago and ive gotten much better since then soo.

if youve read this far this is once again a reminder to read zero win game by kayzero on ao3

[raisinchallah]

you know the post that had me the most oh my god maybe im not autistic this is insane was this video where this guy was like acting out a fake dialogue with a neurotypical person who was annoyed that he was overexplaining things and hes like well ur not doing it right and like saying just full stop its the neurotypical persons fault for being annoyed at being told how to do stuff because they were unenlightened to the correct way and like seemingly not able to understand this would annoy someone and everyone in the comments was wholeheartedly agreeing wishing everyone was super normal about being told how to do stuff which is so wild to me cuz i get like the overexplaining thing and i know it often is not like malice or critique but literally how are u not driven up a wall because its like immovable object vs immovable object like this conflict would be worse with two autistic people tbh this isnt a neurotypical thing no force on earth greater than an autistic person and their specific routine like dont tell me this is wrong dont tell me what to do explodes u with eye lasers like akfkakkf im very familiar with this type of conflict my last job i had a coworker literally nicest dude in the world but was soooo particular about how stuff was done like more stringent than our managers telling me to only shake the noodles dry with a specific hand grip type stuff and again he meant zero malice and was just trying to help me and train me but i literally felt like i was clawing the fucking walls like um dont break my routine and like again i get the impulse i do i was like mentally feeling like noo how could u be doing it wrong (different from me) when working with my less experienced coworker and like i get the insane micromanager thing lol my autistic dad also hates being told what to do but will try to offer wayyy too much help and advice and corrections to the point u cant do it urself and i think i was just like so fascinated and appalled that like i fully get people being like of course my overexplaining is just helpful and kind cuz thats how its taken but having zero idea of the reverse of being on the other end of someone telling u how to do stuff but theyre wrong about it or simply different being literally the worst thing in the entire world the systems the rules the order comes crashing down and somehow instead everyones like yeah neurotypicals just gotta get it together and listen to our advice and im like no actually wheres the rights for people who are particular freaks to a degree they cant stand being told what to do in a different manner like how do u not suffer with this all the time if u have such strong opinions

[rontra]

holding your hand looking into your eyes is the exact energy I intended thank you for picking up on it

🤝

typeoneninja asked: Maybe though do say who powergirl is because I have actually less than zero idea

oh my god i get to talk about my blorbo...okay well you MUST understand i'm still a comics newbie and laser focus on only the stuff i directly care about so it's not like i've read everything about her or anything (and things do vary--sometimes A LOT depending on the character lol--from comic to comic as is DC's dark design). so take everything here as kinda loosy-goosy from someone who's Casually Acquainted. however (LONG POST)

^me.

you know Supergirl right. heard of her. kara zor-el (spelling may wary) she's superman's cousin (usually) and has the same power set. it's me supergirl and i have all your powers

power girl is Also kara zor-el (spelling may vary) from a Different Dimension. two of them.

the details about her backstory vary a little but the agreed upon IDEA for her is that her home dimension has like collapsed somehow or the earth in it is torn to shreds or whatever. she's either like the only survivor of a dimension that went poof or she's been isekai'd here from an earth that was getting blown up by demons or whatever.

and now there's two karas and theyre forced to coexist on the same earth and they can't both show up dressed like supergirl so now power girl has to do her own thing.

that's like generally the gist of whats going on w her conceptually. she got vooped over here and now she's stranded on an earth that isn't hers with castmates that aren't the same people she knew

like i said the specifics of her backstory vary but on top of being Dimension Displaced she usually shares Supergirl's whole "after their home planet exploded she arrived to earth much later than Superman did, due to Space Shenanigans" thing. she's usually older than supergirl. and she DOES have bigger boobs also. NOT sure why that's a dimensional difference between them but i'll take it (what were they feeding her on earth 2?)

sometimes they're drawn basically looking identical. i can understand the impulse (they are both kara zor-el after all.) but i think it's kind of a shame when power girl doesn't look Older than her because i like it when she's older than her. i guess sometimes they either ditch that part or just don't feel like it. F.

anyway when they look identical you can usually tell them apart by identifying which one DC has bequeathed the Boob Window upon and that one will be power girl. works every time

to me i became enamored with her when i was reading some green lantern comic (it was my first comic, they had launched a guy's coffin into the sun and had to go get it back it was wack) and i noticed a boob window girl (my beloved) had BEEN INVITED but didnt get to DO anything. she spent all her time standing in crowd shots while other people did the main stuff. and i thought "wow. now there's a character i need to put in my purse". and the rest is history

it was like this

i felt like bad for her i was like oh honey...you're coming with me... my girl in the ensemble

she kind of struggles in general because she doesn't get a lot of content coming her way. (and when she does it's not usually stuff that i love.) she shares this with supergirl too 🥰

anyway i hope that helps a little. she's supergirl from a different dimension and she's stuck here now. is the gist of it.

-

for a bonus side-elaboration on what IM doing over here in my AU, my main basis for CTDE power girl is her shenanigans in the n52 where she gets stuck here WITH another extremely normal girl (they get isekai'd together during like a big dumb demon war on their home earth). that's helena wayne she's batman's daughter in the other dimension and no such person exists on this earth. they're both stuck (together) (the only 2 people on earth who know and understand each other) (it's romance) (superbat for girls)

in that story power girl becomes like mildly obsessed for a bit with devising a way to get HOME to her own dimension and earth which is (as far as she knows) still under siege by Planet Fucking Hellmouth. shes building machines. shes using technology

(while helena believes there's nothing to go home to anymore and they should try to make a new life in this new dimension)

what gets me about it is that its SO FUNNY that this specific power girl's setup is basically a supervillain origin story that they just don't lean into because her name is on the book (obviously). (hey why do so many villains build a DimensionFucking Machine that's gonna Fuck Up the Dimensions because theyre obsessed with something on the other side anyway)

but i feel no such restraint obviously!!!!

so anyway my CTDE "Arc 1" is about Power Girl (now almost two decades deep in her desperate fixation) finishing building the ultimate DimensionFucker 9000 to get home. shes been working on this for years. she doesn't care very much about this earth and she needs to go back to her own one NOW

Helena is realizing with horror she's way too late to talk her babygirl out of this one because PG just isn't listening to her anymore (and as a human she would struggle to snap PG out of it by force). she feels she has no other recourse but to betray her most specialest girl and sell her out to supergirl, who's investigating the Weird Dimension Rift Shit that's been going on (and is strong enough to actually fight her)

And Supergirl has to stop PG because what that thing is doing to HER universe is NOT GOOD!!!!!

(Supergirl was like a teenager when her home planet krypton went kaboom--she Remembers it and feels detached from everything because she doesn't Have a home anymore + oh my god the trauma + also no one on earth even really needs her that much. but that doesn't mean PG can DESTROY THE DIMENSION!!!!)

(also in my AU the other earth is actually lost for good, so it's not only a Grief Quest but a FUTILE Grief Quest because there's no one alive and nothing to salvage on the other side of the portal anyway)

It's the "Power Girl As Villain In A Supergirl Book" arc. because i think women should have cute obsessions that endanger other people and i LOVE when the karas interact

this is why i drew pictures of them being very not nice to each other 😔

like it all works out. it's fine. they do some crying and screaming at each other, some kicking and punching, helena gets her piece in, and PG's brain fungus finally calms down enough for her to take the "Protagonist Kara" seat for Arc 2 (when Supergirl has her own issues to deal with)

theres just a lot of "kara zor el screaming At Herself that she can't go home because there is no such place anymore and she has to live with that forever in a place she doesn't belong". you know. girl talk

anyway that's like roughly power girl + what im doing with her in my first arc (helena is here too dont worry) hope that helps. shes my comic blorbo. hope she gets the main stage in a good comic someday. MDGHBJFGM

[pineapplerightsideupcake]

hello im on anon bc im new to radblr and im a crypto but just wanted to say thank you for standing up for bisexuals on this blog. idk why but for some reason i expected radblr to have better opinions on bi women than the whole ‘sexually promiscuous bihet’ and ‘traitor for being osa’ and ‘more privileged than homosexuals’ bullshit that everybody else spews. the alphabet cult is actively erasing us in favor of ‘trans inclusive labels’, radblr is invalidating us by blatantly ignoring so many bi women’s experience with sexuality. the biphobia here is almost worse than any offhanded comment ive heard from a straight person. i also don’t think many understand that some women know they’re bi and are confident in that, but others may use bi during a time when theyre unsure if they’re actually attracted to men. ive gone a few of my teenage years acknowledging to myself that im bi, but now in my 20s im questioning if i ever truly felt attracted to men. the things i feel sexually in my most recent relationship with a woman are things ive never felt or even imagined were possible when ‘crushing’ on a guy. i acknowledge that *some* men are aesthetically pleasing for me to look at, but i’m also penis repulsed and always have been. theres nothing sexy to me about penis. truly. it makes me ill thinking about it. and that is confusing for me, bc seeing so many lesbians on here say how sure theyve been about liking women makes me think they did not grow up in an area like i did where homosexuality was truly thought of as demonic, even by the most ‘liberal’ people. i had no idea ssa was normal until i was probably 12 or 13 years old, and before then i just. repressed those feelings. i still did until i was about 17 and fully admitted to myself that ‘hey, i like girls’.

also i didn’t even know what the ‘comphet masterdoc’ was until exploring radblr, but i had heard comphet before and felt that it was very accurate in describing how i feel about men. idk anything abt what’s on the doc. regardless of my ‘true’ sexuality, it feels like theres a very hostile attitude towards bisexuality here, or even someone saying ‘ive tried to have a crush on guys before but only feel sexually/romantically attracted to women’ is met with ‘if youve even THOUGHT about having sex with a man then youre not a lesbian.’ no room for nuance.

sorry for the rant in your inbox, i hope this is okay. but yeah. thank you for being open about bisexuals here and standing up for them.

Thank you! I realized a while ago that radblr had a lot of issues that need to be challenged but I’ve also come to appreciate why these issues occur.

At the end of the day, almost nowhere allows women to speak this freely. Lesbians have had even their online communities absolutely destroyed by the TQ. So more than a few lesbian women on here really don’t want to talk to or about non lesbian women. And I think they’d be happier if they created a separate space for themselves on here where they didn’t feel pressured to, which I think is where a ton of this negativity comes from.

Bisexual women also need to stop offering themselves up as social sacrifices. I see a lot of the anti bi stuff come from bi women themselves sadly. A lot of women on radblr never unlearned that deeply unhelpful ID pol hierarchy from their TRA days.

As for your own personal journey, don’t let other people’s pain, no matter how legitimate, compound your own pain. The way I navigated my sexuality was I called myself a lesbian in my head because men did repulsed me. But it felt like a lie. I’d see a handsome dude jogging and feel a pang of attraction. Men still crept into my fantasies. I have zero desire to sleep with or date men. But that’s got nothing to do with my attraction to them. It’s a conscious personal choice I’ve made for my own happiness and safety.

So call yourself a lesbian just inside your head. Do it everyday. Look in the mirror and say “I am a lesbian” and if after a few months that feels like a lie then you’re bisexual and that’s amazing! If it feels like coming home, if everyday it feels more true, then you’re a lesbian and that’s amazing!

Please love yourself no matter what 💛

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

Ohmygosh I literally just saw the reply u had to my ask and you KEEP GIVING ME SNIPPET IDEAS !!! sugu with an arm around your waist and playing with your hair is soooo cute :,(( okok but talking about what that made me think of… one idea that’s really growing on me is (very specific but hear me out) childhood friends with stsg — you all have some pretty deep personal feelings for eachother (ur in love) (but shhh it’s for the plot) and (RELEVANT!!!! HEAR ME OUT!!!!) reader is a bit too nice to people who don’t always deserve it, maybe struggles with saying no to people. SO… somehow, maybe you end up in a relationship with someone who stsg just immediately do not like. Probably someone who they simply just don’t think is right for you (only they are :3), or is toxic but in a very sneaky way. So that they can see it, but you can’t. And the whole reason reader would be dating this other person in the first place is not actually because they like them but just because they want to experience romance (maybe gaslighted themselves into thinking they DID actually like the person) because it’s not like you have two of the most caring and loyal best friends that are in love with you to help you experience romance, right???? RIGHT???? 🤨🤨🤨 and reader doesn’t seem to immediately recognise that what their “partner” is doing is unhealthy/understand how to set boundaries in place. Me personally I think stsg would go insane after seeing you tolerate someone that treats u wrong :,( I feel like at first they would be a bit hesitant to do anything bold because you know!! As much as they hate it, it’s your life and only you can decide who to date !! (even if they both know damn well u would be so much happier with them) but then. After meeting your partner and seeing the way they treat you, I don’t think it would be long before satoru is attempting to explode them with his mind and sugu is straight up deathstaring them SHDJDHHF THEYRE SOO SILLY PLS😭😭 maybe you leave to go the bathroom or something and when you come back the mf is shaking and sweating in fear. and they’re like “🧍🧍 we didn’t do anything we swear…” I CANNOTTT 😭😭 okok thank u for listening to my silly speech about how I love them more than life itself shehdh.,,, I feel like this one and the cheated on!reader go together well ,… :3 — stsg anon !!

STSG ANON YOU’VE DONE IT AGAINNNNNN u already know how i feel abt stsg childhood friends to lovers ……. 😔😔😔 i am a weak weak individual.

goshhhh stsg anon ….. ur concepts are always so tasty and full of potential …… this kind of reader would be so perfect for stsg like they would protect u soooo fervently T—T… i can imagine them being like little guardian angels when they were children, scaring bullies away and encouraging u to stand up for urself….. :(( they’re just the sweetest little guys ever!!! and i agree that u dating someone who doesn’t treat u well would literally make them go insane LMAO “satoru is attempting to explode them with his mind and sugu is straight up deathstaring them” THEY’RE SOOOOOO SILLY SO OVERPROTECTIVE……… 😭😭😭

no but i agree sm though, i think they hate ur partner INSTANTLY and want them to Die but they don’t want to upset u yk??? and they don’t want to act like they have control over ur life either. so they just trashtalk them in secret 😭😭 but once they realize that the relationahip is dragging u down and causing u harm i honestly think they just get desperate … like. your happiness and health ALWAYS comes first to them. and suddenly they’re staging a whole intervention, making a powerpoint to convince u to see your own worth + break up with ur partner….. and if u refuse?? they are NOT above threatening the loser themselves. like. stsg are sweethearts but they have zero respect for anyone who hurts you <33

aaaaand then mysteriously your partner breaks up with you :33 toooootally not bc of stsg. they’re innocent ur honour !!! they’re just relieved that u aren’t stuck with someone like that anymore. (aaand they’re happy that they get to be as touchy as they want without u getting worried abt making ur partner jealous <333)

tbh i think stsg might suffer even more if u were to date someone who’s genuinely a very good person LMAO…. because they can’t help but feel overprotective, a little hostile, but they just can’t find anything to complain about???? your s/o is perfect. but they still feel this strange dislike towards them …. (i think this would also force them to realize that they do in fact like reader 😭) anyway i feel like they’re very much grumpy and a little stiff at first but when they see how happy ur partner makes u they can’t really hate them anymore 😔😔😔 and i do feel like they’d become friends with them eventually…. reluctantly…… as long as they can stay by your side, they’re satisfied :’3

[transmandrake]

I think its fair for me to think this considering I 100% liked gen uhhhm uhh what. Number. 8? Galar generations pokemon designs, so its not my distaste for the direction and lack of playing them making me think this, but maaaaan. Paldeas designs feel unusually half-baked. Kimda tempted to have some fun redesigning some.

Idk what it is. Reminds me of how people complained about gen 4 designs being covered in doodads and wierd clunky shapes, but for real this time. Its a valid complaint for some gen 4 mons but here, jeez, every second mon feels like something from a fangame (generalising obviously, tons of fangames have sickass designs but the general 'fakemon you made to have an obligatory pokemon stand in' vibes. Idk.

Tons feel unfinished design wise and missing evolutions. Is there an unusual amount of single stage mons this time round it feels...?

Don't get me started on the paradox mons. I feel theres maybe a plot reason theyre not literally like, from the actual past or present, but maaaaan. How do you make the concept of past and future pokemon so fucking lame. You have either The Same Pokemon But With Doodads (which megas already were... but like good because they werent supposed to be, yknow, from alternate times, just same mon but Power) or The Same Pokemon But Robot.

Also just disappointing because... pokemon does fossil mons so good? Idk, was there really not enough mons to do some fun stuff like, primeape but synapsid for past, gyarados but with legs for future, or just make a single fuckin future one not a robot. Where are the goofy alien future mons. Uuuuaaargh!!!!

The worst part now is that this sinply isnt going to happen again. They had a generation about time and they didnt do more dinosaurs or prehistoric anything. Or wacky future stuff. They had one chance annd they did nothing interesting with it.

*melts into a puddle of mild disappointment*

*reforms* -counterpoint though the convergent mons??? Fucking sick idea??? Still feel a bit undercooked but oohhh. Please give me more. Its bizaare they bring in a concept as, i guess, advanced as convergent evolution essentialy but seemingly had zero ideas for past versions of mons. Wat.

[theskyexists]

gundam ep 5 & ep 6 & ep 7 &8

Poor elan, raised a tool, tortured as a child. surprising he wouldnt want aerial for himself if it doesnt hurt him. but he can actually feel the robot as his own body....

i love that jeturk actually came to protect suletta. really like him now tho i dont understand him.

aha he did want it

Suletta is definitely starting to get on my nerves. i know shes just in it for the sleepovers and the boyfriends and whatever it takes to set up a school and not the high stakes intergalactic political game. but like. get with it. stop accepting duels.

hold up hold on, Elan was old enough to accept the role of being a surrogate Elan... i get that it takes the life out of the surrogate, they didnt want to make Elan go through it. i guess...i guess it makes sense.

why wouldnt aerial have thrusters. we SAW that lfrith has thrusters.we know she went flying around on mercury. you’re telling me she couldnt fly there? shes in zero gravity here....we SAW her pick up miorine. wwhat

theyre in outer space. they could blow each other to quick goddamn death here. aerials voice is that of a child....

theres a lot of Nanoha in this. she trounces everybody decidedly and befriends them in doing so. they realise that winning - everything they thought theyd get through winning - that its not actually what they want or need. But that Suletta can give them something else...

IM AN UNDERSTANDING BRIDE. I WILL TOLERATE SOME MINOR TWO-TIMING. i adore the concept of suletta harem anime. but mio is first of course

oh shit. ok they showed quite deliberately. by jeturk getting thrown out. by not-elan getting discarded. that capital does not CARE for fairytale befriending.

it is merciless

MIO DOESNT JUST LET SULETTA INTO THE GREENHOUSE BUT EVEN LETS HER NEAR THE TOMATOES WITH SHEARS

the beautiful and simple metaphor

RED AND BLUE. TRULY BEAUTIFUL DRESSES. OH MY GOD

Nika tries to compliment Mio and she takes it as sarcasm lololol

STAND UP STRAIGHT. their dynamic is so great sfjlkdsjfaksd

why is suletta’s mother trying to make an enemy of mio - why is she letting on shes not fully to be trusted? (or is she trying to teach her a lesson? why say it so evilly tho)

ah. Nika got the thrusters from Shaddiq.

she actually got out of her stutter because of mio’s harsh love haha

wtf. how are they getting out of this one. why did Delling let them go in the first place and why go about accusing her once again of possessing a gundam in public in such a roundabout way. what is stopping him from using his power fully?

ok thats cool. thats a very cool idea by miorine. but everybodys afraid of delling mio

VERY GOOD IDEA BY MIO. VERY GOOD. (it’s not pride, it’s hatred, far more effective lol)

japanese people always seem to think so weirdly from anime. ‘the gundams curse is heavier than you think’ - IT IS JUST A FUCKING MACHINE. A KILLING MACHINE. oh no its pilots die. yeah. so what. why the fuck is that the line. its not MAGIC. you cant just mash ‘witch hunt’ with ‘killer robot’ and be done with the worldbuilding..

Anyway Delling goes in for it lol why. does he care about miorine after all? he set this whole thing up to destroy the gundam and now he’s like ok yeah you can take on the curse then i guess. what.

anyway yeah its definitely better to be ceo of a startup company funded by the whole group including your father (who is only 3% owner!) than be a daughter completely dependent on him. i do not understand why Delling did what he did, why he made Mio a ‘bride’, why he didnt destroy Aerial last time nor why he went along with setting up a company for MAKING GUNDAMS when he already ‘knew’ the pilot dying problem had been solved. what is this man thinking

her mother is completely underestimating what having lied to her daughter and then admitting to it will do to their relationship

so is Mio buying up Peil’s team and shin sei’s to work on gundams based on Aerial and Pharact? Peil and shin sei didn’t even agree. tho i guess suletta’s mom was like: yep sure lets go

even the intro song is kannazuki no miko as heck.

still lying to suletta

‘i didnt come here to build mobile suits’ then why are you at the mobile suit school

IS THIS THE FIRST TIME THEY’VE DEALT WITH THE REALITY OF MOBILE SUITS BEING WEAPONS????

miorine is very smart. suletta is not very smart but has other qualities.

miorine really does have a LOT of freedom of movement right now. yet she hasnt thought to use it at all to get to Earth.

no one but the vanadis group ever thought to use robot tech to save lives? prospera literally has a prosthesis and mio wasnt TOO shocked. how are spacians suriving space right now??

what the fuck lol. who in the world was like: yeah lets leave the billions of investment to the high schoolers to make a silly video with. THE WHOLE GROUP WAS LOOKING TO MAKE WEAPONS AND NOW THEY’RE LIKE HEY LOOK AERIAL IS HERE AND WE”RE GONNA......USE IT TO IMPROVE PEOPLE’S BODIES? there is simply no way to marry the giant robot with developing medical technology.... why do the cyborg parts need an ai....why develop a suit at all? just to please the shareholders? mio is gonna be in the same problems as vanadis

‘Its better than being complicit in war’ YOU ARE AT A MOBILE SUIT ACADEMY. YOU WERE ALWAYS GONNA BE COMPLICIT

hold on. the group just invested 240 million in this startup and now some school regulations are gonna stop the establishment of the company? lol come on

[lakesbian]

this is a post i and i alone care about but sometimes we have to make posts like such. as bedtime stories for ourselves. anyway if he didn't die due to they never go to behemoth fight it'd be like

normal bestiefriendship for extended period of time but like. ft their brand of absurd amounts of physical intimacy and secret-sharing and gay little 'heehee i'm putting my feet on the table in front of you' 'heehee i'm pushing them off' flirting

aisha 'impulsive' laborn randomly kissing him one time when they're hanging out bc she was feeling Particularly Well Perceived or Teenage Hormonal or whatever the fuck and then just immediately resuming pretending absolutely nothing happened and theyre having a completely normal time watching this movie together. which alec goes along with because he emotionally bluescreens and his response to any sort of realization that he's having Feelings, Of Any Kind, is to play it cool calm and casual

alecs attempt to convince himself that he's calm cool and casual and doesn't even care and is absolutely not going to make things Weird or Uncomfortable for his Exceedingly Flighty Best Friend Whose Traumas And Approaches To Interpersonal Relationships He Is Deeply Aware Of fails within 48 hours tops because he keeps laying awake rotating the kiss in his mind and being like. doyou think she would do it again. not that i care. would she though. for longer. does this mean she likes me. do i like her.i guess i like her probably. not that its a big deal. i mean i dont care that much. would she sit on my lap. What if she hates me forever and we're not friends anymore. ok no i should just go to bed. and subsequently he caves and starts a conversation to ask where the hell they stand. while being like "if i ran into the street right now that semi-truck probably wouldn't be able to stop in time to avoid hitting me" the entire time in his head

comically enough theyre Literally Canonically the only undersider pair thats even remotely functional about communication and subsequently said conversation is awkward and both of them hate being in it but they survive. mutual conclusion is both of them think the idea of a relationship with anyone sounds awful due to the horrors. which does not change that they still patently like each other and overcompensate by spending the next 1.5 weeks being cartoonishly stilted w/ each other. out there standing 3 entire feet apart while talking. actual sitcom for lisa. brian finds the entire thing very suspicious but can't pin down why. and hes mad bc lisa won't snitch.

they eventually get back 2 their normal equilibrium. and then like 3 weeks later kiss again anyway. and this time they put their brains together and come up with the genius solution of "woagh....if we're Both severely traumatized teenagers with zero interest in or readiness for the idea of a traditional relationship we can simply do whatever we want all of the time forever without making it a Thing." but like in less direct words.

2 straight years of unlabeled meandering until they realize they're more or less for all intents and purposes dating and may as well not bother Refuting The Accusations anymore. but they still go around calling each other dude and fistbumping and glaring at anyone who calls literally any attention 2 their whole deal. this isnt to say that couples calling each other dude or fistbumping is notably out of the ordinary just that they would start gagging if they even Thought about doing anything traditionally romantic. irony-poisoned little shits. they would be cute though. like if alec was there when aisha is being scared of heights during the cauldron base invasion he would yank her down so theyre sitting together & hug her from behind and be like "now when we fall and die they'll find our skeletons together :)" while patting her hand and she would be like Dont Say That Dickhole. but still not move an inch until they got 2 the ground. and most importantly he would engage in highly academic debate regarding the nature of dragons genitals with her.

if alec doesn't die because they never go to behemoth fight in the first place he and aisha have a relatively pleasant and normal time and are kind of sort of ambiguously dating in a genuinely functional and reparative and cute manner 2 years down the line. if alec doesnt die because he tries to kill himself but god or whoever intervenes for the sake of watching him continue to do freak behaviors they become the worlds first strained dead bedroom married couple with children to have never dated at all. brian style. and because aisha has never actually had the "havent said wowzers for a while probably due to grief" inducing experience of her best friend and only confidant killing himself in front of her at the age of 13 she is entirely un-sobered and like 45% worse at herding the heartbroken. it also doesnt help that one of her toxic traits is if alec kicked a baby into traffic in front of her she would be like Lol hes so silly and that includes if that baby is one of his own siblings. miserable for everyone involved butv ery funny. give it 15 years and they can all laugh about it. maybe.

[junietuesday]

who are thseterius and bareleifdrjas?

anon you have zero idea what youve just unleashed. (this little parenthetical was writtten after everything else in this post but this is focusing on thesterius bc it just got SO LONG. barreleifdrias will have to wait </3)

ok so. hades video game 2018. you play as a dude named zagreus fighting to escape the ancient greek underworld but the point is that when you get to elysium, the two guys blocking your exit are theseus, the theseus of minotaur and ship and labors fame, only hes an annoying pro wrestling vibes egotistical blond (/derogatory /JOKE) dude, and the minotaur, the cannibalistic half man half bull monster in the labyrinth, only hes a chill honorable (hot) dude named asterius. and theyre best bros!!!! despite their meeting and the myth theyre most famous for being theseus killing the minotaur, asterius and theseus are now super best friends. theyre so unlikely but the respect for each other is clearly so deep. reason one why theyre compelling.

here they are btw. (via hades wiki)

and its like, theseus is so annoying that general fandom opinion is that hes the worst character in hades, in a “you love to hate him” playful way sometimes, or real hatred depending on which circles of the hades fandom you trawl, but hes Written to be disliked. even tho hes the hero of the original story, a hero among the ranks of like, heracles and that ilk. and meanwhile, everyone loves asterius bc hes such a bro, hes so chill and respectful and honorable, so many people think hes hot, people are like “dump theseus you could do so much better”, hes such a fan fave. even tho hes the monster of the original story, the villain!!! that role reversal is so so compelling!!!!!! hades didnt even change anything abt their backstories on paper but their personalities are what makes it a sort of roleswap. like theseus’ only redeeming quality is that he loves asterius so much, and asterius’ only real flaw is that hes so dedicated to theseus lmao

(all these dialogue images via @/hadesgamedialogue here on tumblr)

and its especially cool in hades bc its like, asterius, the minotaur, the one that everyone in the hades fandom loves way more, is an actual person. the minotaur is half man of course. theres so much thats added to the story of theseus and the minotaur overall by making asterius a person. but so very few stories take advantage of it. hades game first opened my eyes to the potential of asterius being an awesome character and i love it so much for it.

and THEN through menu stuff you eventually find out how the minotaur got such a high standing in elysium despite being a monster, fighting side by side w his killer-turned-bestie, adored by a crowd of cheering fans that watches your every fight, and especially constantly talked up by theseus himself. and as it turns out!!!!! after asterius died, he actually ended up in erebus. no surprise there, why shouldnt a half-animal monster end up in tartarus 2 electric boogaloo. but then when theseus died, he thought of asterius, and decided that since "their fame and glory were intertwined" (according to the in-game codex), if theseus deserved elysium for being part of the legendary theseus and the minotaur myth, surely asterius did too.

can you fucking imagine??? youre famous for killing a monster, you had an epic one-on-one fight to the death, but then when you get eternal paradise for it can you imagine thinking "hey what happened to the monster. hey what if he was a person. hey what if he was a person i could have join me in literal ancient greek heaven." and the codex says theseus almost certainly risked his own spot in elysium for it �� the guy writing the codex would know, he tried to get his own boyfriend into elysium but ended up having to stay in hell in his boyfriend's place. but no theseus literally just got asterius into elysium, kept his own place there, and now theyre basically gladiator celebrities living(ish) their best lives(ish). THE SHEER ROMANTICISM OF IT.

like i was saying before asterius has always been a monster, but now the man who killed him is also the man who first saw him as a person...... a person worthy of paradise, a person worth saving, a person who gave him a glorious fight for the ages, a person. circling back around the roleswap thing, like a comment on one thesterius fic i read puts it, the player hates theseus bc of his in-game annoyingness, but learns to see him as a person through asterius' eyes, through asterius' high esteem of theseus and theseus' decent treatment of asterius. and at the same time, asterius has always been seen as a beast, but it was only through theseus' eyes and esteem and asterius was able to see himself as anything more.

AND THATS NOT EVEN ALL. this is all the backstory stuff, everything that takes place off-screen before the player even shows up. but zagreus (the player character) shows up and hes a polite guy so hes very nice to asterius bc asterius has been nothing but nice to him, even if they do have to fight often (bc asterius is both a miniboss on his own and the regional boss alongside theseus), its more like friendly and respectful sport than anything by the time they get to know each other. but theseus is constantly insulting zagreus bc of his own skewed sense of honor and dedication to the gods bc of theseus' own willful misunderstanding abt who zagreus is. that isnt super important but the point is, when theseus sees asterius, his bestie, being friends w zagreus, the guy he despises, guess what happens.

thats right. the "asterius is cheating on me 😭😭😭😭" arc. bc theseus is so sad and pathetic that he cant conceive of his bestie having any other friends. asterius Must be abandoning him to marry some other guy who is just so much nicer and cooler than him. and so theseus has a temper tantrum abt it. im bullying theseus rn bc hes a loser but also i dont like how relatable his feelings are during this arc.

if theseus sees asterius as a person worthy of love, then its also the same vice versa: asterius is the first person to see theseus as a real person Also Worth Love. hes not a monster, in fact hes a hero. he should be adored by all. and he does have his supporters in the arena! but do they like the real him? hes deeply annoying. he talks too much. hes desperately clingy to what friends he does have bc he just has so few of them. all of his relationships have ended Awfully, and it was his own fault for reacting so strongly and passionately to the things around him.

he and zagreus are actually kinda similar: theyre endlessly kind to people they deem worthy of it but also scathing to people they hate, theyre both accomplished warriors, theyre extremely stubborn (zag keeps trying to escape the underworld no matter how many times it takes, and theseus keeps meeting him and trying to stop him every time no matter how many times he loses), etc etc. but unlike theseus, zagreus is so charming and friendly. theseus tries so hard to be charismatic, but everyone flocks to be friends w zagreus after like a single conversation, and theseus only has asterius. so its very easy for this deeply insecure guy — no matter how he tries to cover it up by a massive ego and a constant barrage of insults toward zagreus — to believe that asterius might see zagreus as a way better version of him, and break up w theseus and go date zagreus instead. and zagreus does nothing to discourage this notion lmao. (honestly most hades players wouldnt have done anything to discourage this lmao. ive seen so many memes, such as this post, abt wanting asterius to just divorce theseus and "get himself a better man" and date zagreus already.)

and honestly its like, as zagreus himself says in a different dialogue, theseus took asterius up to elysium yes, but like, theseus also killed asterius in the first place, so they should be even. but its not just abt that for asterius. its abt how during their fight in the labyrinth, asterius got to at least experience once during his life what it meant to meet someone as an equal. its abt how theseus was the first person who saw him as a real person, not a mindless bloodthirsty beast. its abt how theseus took asterius to elysium, yes, giving asterius the chance to spread his wings and figure himself out and truly live, in a way he never would have been able to in erebus. its how theseus gave asterius the chance to experience friendship and love. so asterius, of course, doesnt gay divorce. he says this.

“he doesnt even understand it” and its literally so true. zag doesnt understand any of the things abt theseus and asterius being the only people to really understand each other and stay, despite everything repulsive abt the other, and be friends. i would bet the average player doesnt understand it either (see all the common hades fandom opinion “asterius dump theseus already”). but asterius understands it. he reminds theseus of this shared understanding. no matter what, no matter everything that should have come between them long ago, no matter anything that theseus fears might come between them now, asterius and theseus are a pair. its always theseus and the minotaur, their names together have gone down in legend. their theme song in hades is even called the king and the bull!!! bc theyre a matched set, theyre hero and villain, theyre inseparable, theyre gay.

also since theyre really just the regional bosses of zone 3 of hades (almost all of the contents of this essay are entirely missable), they get a cool new best friend battle move called the “counterstrike”, where asterius charges into theseus’ shield to create a shockwave, after they reconcile. to go along with their previously established bestie attack “bullhorn”, in which asterius picks theseus up and literally throws him at zagreus. theseus is such a dork he literally shouts “counterstrike!” and “bullhorn!” when they perform those moves like this is some kind of anime. gay wrath moments <3

tl;dr: thesterius is the ultimate ship of all time. thankyou

[wisteria-lodge]

bird primary + snake secondary (bird model)

hi! apologies if this is all over the place, im going a little crazy. so, i am going absolutely crazy trying to figure out my primary and secondary. i used to think i was a snake bird (modeling badger snake), but then i started thinking about it and went “hm. maybe im actually a double snake?” and now im thinking i might be a lion snake or . something. i have absolutely no idea. i do know ive either exploded or burnt both primary and secondary at some point though.

So some Exploding or Burning, probably an Internal primary (Snake or Lion) with an I Move secondary (Bird or Snake.) Let’s see what we have. 

so, ive always thought i must be a snake primary because i’m very people-oriented (and i regard people with a certain type of possessiveness), but thats mostly because like… i have an intrinsic fear of being alone thanks to lgbt things (im aromantic - so the internalized arophobia and fear of dying alone is REAL big, esp considering my ex was just straight-up an arophobe) and mental illness issues (i have autism and ptsd that both mesh together to create my being incredibly anxious when around new people/situations - which doesnt lend itself well to interacting with others, so when i do latch onto someone, i latch on HARD). 

Just breathe. It’s okay. But yeah, that’s survival mode human stuff. We do have Burnt secondary language “not good at dealing with new people/situations” etch. And you *did* apologize to me first thing, which is my favorite litmus test for whether a secondary is burnt or not. 

i would not feel bad dropping each and every person in my life for literally zero reason other than i didnt like their vibes. in fact, i really wish i felt comfortable enough to do that! 

Cool. That’s kinda badass. Make me think Idealist primary... and probably Lion, who are classically the most comfortable being loners. 

im so tired all the time, and being the resident mom friend doesnt help that at all. 

ooooh we’ve got a burnt secondary, compensating Badger secondary model. (Or possibly just badger secondary.) 

ive honestly started getting a bit resentful of my friends bc i feel like theyre making me take care of them (though i know they arent).

That’s a common problem with Badger secondary people who aren’t *really* protective of their boundaries. 

so… i guess it would be helpful to explain my morals and motivations, huh?? to be blunt, i really dont know what they currently are. ive started pulling away from relying on other people. which is really healthy for me i think. i used to rely on my ex in particular to handle all of my morals (with them convincing me i was actually evil in the process - they were abusive) and im really glad that im healing enough to stop outsourcing at least that, but im still trying to build up… something to rely on. 

You’re the second SortMe post in a row that to use the specific phrase “outsourcing my morals,” but I don’t think I’m going to sort you the same way, and I’ll tell you why. 

Mainly what I am doing here is making what I consider to be statistically likely guesses. I’ve read a lot of these, and it’s enough to start seeing patterns. And I can tell you that “gaslighting ex” is MUCH more of Burnt Bird primary story, than a Burnt Lion primary story. Put that together with “I’m trying to build up... something to rely on”... and I’d be very surprised if you weren’t a Bird, friend.

i really dont ever feel quite secure. especially not enough to actually express myself as myself. hopping from relationship to relationship has been my stand-in for support up to now, but relationships are just … augh. i dont like them. ive always also felt a drive to protect and care for people (and animals! i wanted to do wildlife rehab growing up, and on the people side ive been interested in anthropology) in need

Sounds like a pretty good start to building a system. 

which sounds very badgery on paper, but honestly i cant relate to badgers really at all. something about it just doesnt really fit me, i guess? i cant relate to the community aspect of it. like yes, every person is a person, but also like. thats not whats important to me. i want to do good things, and be good, or at least better than i was before, and yes that involves taking care of those in need (to me at least), but its not… like how badgers are typically described. i dont even have anything against badgers, i really like them, but im just. not that.

You’re not a Badger. You like some of the values, but your life is not built out of communities, and you seem to like it that way.

i have also almost never forgiven anyone in my life. the few times i have ended up being mistakes, so never again. 

There was another Bird primary post that made the important distinction that there’s forgiving someone... and then there’s letting them back in to do the same thing again. 

on the snake side, i feel like i might have used to rank people according to how important they are to me, but i think that was more of a learned thing than anything else. i really admire snakes, and i want to be one, but i feel more like im just . not being genuine when i think of myself as one, even though thats what i get each time i take the official shc test (which i have recently taken the 2.0 one) and what ive considered myself to be for years now. its stopped fully fitting (unless im somehow gaslighting myself here) and i really dont know what to do about that. 

You also weren’t in a very healthy place recently, and it’s a lot harder to get a read on yourself when you’re not doing okay. (Not impossible, just... harder.) 

like, ill live, its really not that big of a deal, but i still have emotions and its still difficult. i dont like being wrong.

That’s also sounding pretty Bird to me. Both “I don’t like being wrong” and the “my emotions are difficult.” If you were a Lion, those emotions would be your compass, but Birds don’t work that way. 

on the how i do things side - i tend to react very aggressively when what/who i care about gets fucked over, and see no problem with being vicious or lying, acting, whatever i need to do to get my point across. i dont view it as bad. whatever works, works yknow? 

Okay, so you’re probably a Snake or a Bird secondary (which you knew.) And I do see where that Snake primary false positive is coming from. You have some Snake values in your system for sure, but you don’t sound like a Snake when you talk. 

i do like planning at least an outline before things, but im also perfectly content throwing it out the window. though i do enjoy collecting little bits of info i can use later! and learning! and using what i learn! but its very much a “oooohhh this is fun!!!” type thing. 

So that’s at least a fun Bird model (and it seems like every single neurodivergent person has a Bird model, so that’s not all that surprising.) 

i am not a hard worker. at all. i HATE doing things the badger sec way. it sucks and i hate it and i just want to get things done with immediately right now.

Hmm. Now that sounds very In-the-Moment, doesn’t it? I’m starting to lean Snake. 

one thing i very clearly remember from childhood is that once, in middle school, i hung out with a group of mostly boys and we were like. the loner weirdo kids. and one guy smacked me across the face for whatever reason and i immediately went “if you do that again, i will kick you directly in the crotch,” and then he went “i like you!” and we were. ig friends? from then on. Guys.. idk 

Guys are known to socialize like that sometimes. 

i didnt really have that much of an opinion on him that i can remember. i thought i was a bird for a while because of the aforementioned “oh learning fun!” thing and my reliance on at least a light plan, but then i thought about what i do under pressure. and i realized that i go fully improv, and that i feel better doing that than planning. 

Yeah, I bet it does. 

because planning also sucks and i dont really like it. ive tried using planners before and its…. so hard to keep up with….. now, my mom is a lion sec and i dont understand her AT ALL. like yeah, i can imitate her and also push through things directly, but my god is it uncomfy. id prefer to poke around and get a handle on things first, so i can have more of a finesse to what i do. 

Oh this is such classic Snake secondary stuff. Right down to the way that Snake Secondaries do not get Lions, and vice-versa. Also, I dunno, from all the examples given, I would not describe you as “not good at interacting with others.” 

i tend to favor seduction and assassination or rogue-ish routes in games, if that helps any. 

It does. (Snake.) 

sometimes my mom will be set on doing things a certain way and will be metaphorically banging her head on a wall, 

like a Lion 

and ill be in the corner desperately just like “mom please let me do this please let me hand you a different way to do this oh my god you are killing me here that isnt going to work”

Yeah, that seems like a pretty clear communication disconnect. 

[shynessboys]

I love stories where like the intention was never to find that person or that race of people, it was something else but they accidentally fell into the situation.

Even better if person B (from the different race of people) is incredibly stand offish and defensive) while person A just kinda wants to go home lmao. Or OR the researcher route where it 100% is person A’s intention to find person B and they actually do….

Clearly I’ve got a shit ton of supernatural brain rot but I’d like to think there were definitely young hunters who didn’t know a thing maybe even didn’t believe completely. Their hunts never lead them anywhere, they aren’t connected to other hunters only hearing folk tales about them that could very well be fake! To normal people they’re a simple weird conspiracy theorist and they’re losing hope quickly.

One day though… they catch a trail and fortunately or perhaps un-fucking-fortunately they come faced to face with… I HAVE NO IDEA perhaps a vamp, maybe a demon🤔 they have to have some sort of human nature or else person A will be killed lol. I love the idea of demons getting attached to humans though lol

Anyway I’m so like into the whole Hunter community aspect of supernatural, at the very least what they showed in seasons 1-2! The bars, the infighting, connections etc etc the whole moral dilemma of “do you kill them because of their race or do you kill them because theyre genuinely bad? What if they haven’t done anything bad…” UGH so good.

Out of everyone in BTS I think Hobi is the only one who screams Hunter🤔 Taehyung is so fucking supernatural it’s no debate what he’d be. Kind of the same with Seokjin imo! I think Yoongi would be not a Hunter but an informant that knows how to work a gun or if he was a hunter he’d be the type to consider the character of a creature. Jimin…. For me goes both ways. I love supernatural Jimin but also highly trained and skilled Jimin who has little remorse…. YES PLEASEEE. Namjoons the king of hell what else can I say🤷🏽‍♀️ and yes of course Jungkook is the inexperienced one

The thing about Jungkook is that he’s so smart. Speaks latin and multiple forms of other tongues. Knows how to draw circles and owns just about every book there is but in a sense he’s normal? He’s just a guy with ideas and theories and zero way to confirm their truth. He’s also a hunter who has a ton of sympathy, his fascination comes from their existence but outside of that he has no desire to do harm! He’s sweet :( he really is!

Anywho this is random sleepy word vomit that I’ll probably never come back to. I’m realizing writing isn’t nearly as satisfying to me as reading….

In the mood for a nice lil fanfic in which one character meets another from a different race of people and they fall in love 🤔 let’s see what they have….