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taradactyls · 4 months ago

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So I could be totally wrong but, I believe it was sort of expected that men/gentlemen lose their virginity before marriage in regency times. But I also there’s some fandom ‘debate’ about whether or not Mr Darcy would’ve had sex before getting married. So I was just curious about what your canon for Mr Darcy in T3W is. Is he a virgin or not?

I knew someone would ask me this eventually, haha. I've actually had really long conversations with my beta reader about this trying to figure it out. It sounds like this might all be stuff that you’ve already seen discussed in the fandom, but I’ve never thought about it deeply before and so these are new thoughts to me.

I keep going over the historical real-world likelihood, the authorial intent, and the text itself but I’m still not 100%. I’ll explain my thinking and what I find most likely, but here’s your warning that it’s not a clear cut yes/no.

Because on one hand, at that time period it was most common for men in his position to have seen sex workers or have casual encounters/mistresses with women from their estates. Though I do absolutely believe not all men did that, no matter how much wealth and power they had. To go back some centuries, William the Conqueror seemed to be famously celibate (no hints of male lovers either according to the biography I read) until his marriage, and there's no evidence of affairs after it either. The best guesses as to why are that it was due to his religious devotion and the problems that had arisen from himself being a bastard and not wanting to recreate that situation. Concerns over religion and illegitimate children would certainly still have been applicable in the regency to men who thought that way. And in modern times I've seen sex workers say that when an 18/21yo is booked in by his family/friends to 'become a man' often they end up just talking and agree to lie about the encounter. After all, it’s not like every man wants casual sex, even if they aren’t demisexual or something in that vein. But, statistically speaking, the precedent of regency gentlemen would make Darcy not a virgin.

On the other hand, just how aware was Jane Austen, the very religious daughter of a country rector, of the commonness of this? There’s a huge difference between knowing affairs and sex workers existed (and no one who had seen a Georgian newspaper could be blind to this) and realising that the majority of wealthy men saw sex workers at some point even if they condemned the more public and profligate affairs. The literature for young ladies at the time paints extramarital sex - including the lust of men outside of marriage - as pretty universally bad and dangerous. This message is seen from 'Pamela' and other gothic fiction to non-fiction conduct books which Jane Austen would have encountered. Here's something I found in 'Letters to a Young Lady' by the reverend John Bennett which I found particularly interesting as it's in direct conversation with other opinions of the era:

"A reformed rake makes the best husband." Does he? It would be very extraordinary, if he should. Besides, are you very certain, that you have power to reform him? It is a matter, that requires some deliberation. This reformation, if it is to be accomplished, must take place before marriage. Then if ever, is the period of your power. But how will you be assured that he is reformed? If he appears so, is he not insidiously concealing his vices, to gain your affections? And when he knows, they are secured, may he not, gradually, throw off the mask, and be dissipated, as before? Profligacy of this kind is seldom eradicated. It resembles some cutaneous disorders, which appear to be healed, and yet are, continually, making themselves visible by fresh eruptions. A man, who has carried on a criminal intercourse with immoral women is not to be trusted, His opinion of all females is an insult to their delicacy. His attachment is to sex alone, under particular modifications.

The definition of a rake is more than a man who has seen a sex worker once, it's about appearance and general conduct too, but again, would that distinction be made to young ladies? Because they seem to simply be continuously taught 'lust when unmarried is bad and beware men who you know engage in extramarital sex.' As a side note, Jane Austen certainly knew at least something about the mechanics of sex: her letters and literature she read alludes to it, and she grew up around farm animals in the countryside which is an education in itself.

We can also see from this exert that the school of thought seems to be 'reformed rake' vs 'never a rake' in contention for the title of best husband, there's no debate over whether a current rake is unsuitable for a young lady. And, from Willoughby to Wickham to Crawford, I think we have a very clear idea of Jane Austen's ideas of how likely it is notably promiscuous men can reform. This does not preclude the possibility that her disparaging commentary around their lust is based more on over-indulgence or the class of women they seduce, but it's undoubtedly a condemnation of such men directly in line with the first part of what John Bennett says so it's no stretch to believe she saw merit in the follow-on conclusions of the second part as well. Whether she would view it with enough merit to consider celibacy the only respectable option for unmarried men is a bit unclearer.

I did consider that perhaps Jane Austen consciously treated this as a grey area where she couldn’t possibly know what young men did (the same reasoning is why we never see the men in the dining room after the ladies retire, etc) and so didn't hold an opinion on men's extramarital encounters with sex workers/lower-class women at all, but I think there actually are enough hints in her works that this isn’t the case. Though, unsurprisingly, given the delicacy of the subject, there’s no direct mention of sex workers or gentlemen having casual lovers from among the lower-classes in her texts.

That also prevents us from definitively knowing whether she thought extramarital sex was so common, and as unremarkable, as most gentlemen treated it. But we do see from her commentary around the consequences of Maria Bertram and Henry Crawford's elopement that she had criticism of the double standards men and women were held to when violating sexual virtue. Another indication that she perhaps expected good men to be capable of waiting until marriage in the way that she very clearly believed women should. At the very least, a man who often indulges in extramarital sex does not seem to be one who would be considered highly by Jane Austen.

She makes a point of saying, in regards to not liking his wife, that Mr Bennet “was not of a disposition to seek comfort for the disappointment which his own imprudence had brought on, in any of those pleasures which too often console the unfortunate for their folly or their vice.” This must include affairs, though cheating on a wife cannot be a 1:1 equivalent of single young men sleeping around before marriage. However, the latter is generally critically accepted to be one of the flaws that Darcy lays at Wickham’s door along with gambling when talking about their youth and his “vicious propensities" and "want of principle." Though this could be argued that it’s more the extent or publicity of it (but remembering that it couldn't be anything uncommon enough that it couldn't be hidden from Darcy Sr. or explained away) rather than the act itself, or maybe seductions instead of paying women offering those services. I also believe Persuasion mentioning Sunday travelling as proof of thoughtless/immoral activity supports the idea that Jane Austen might have been religious enough that she would never create a hero who had extramarital sex.

So, taken all together this would make Darcy potentially a virgin, or, since I couldn't find absolute evidence of her opinions, leave enough room that he isn’t but extramarital sex isn’t a regular (or perhaps recent) thing and he would never have had anything so established as a mistress.

I’ve also been wondering, if Darcy isn’t a virgin, who would he have slept with? I’ve been musing on arguments for and against each option for weeks at this point. No romantasy has ever made me think about a fictional man's sexual habits so much as the question of Darcy's sexual history. What is my life.

Sex workers are an obvious answer, and the visits wouldn’t have raised any eyebrows. Discretion was part of their job, it was a clean transaction with no further responsibilities towards them, and effective (and reusable, ew) condoms existed at this time so there was little risk of children and no ability to exactly determine the paternity even if there was an accident. It was a fairly ‘responsible’ choice if one wanted no strings attached. In opposition to this, syphilis was rampant at the time, and had been known to spread sexually for centuries. Sex workers were at greater risk of it than anyone else and so the more sensible and risk-averse someone is (and I think Mr Darcy would be careful) the less likely they would be to visit sex workers. Contracting something that was known as potentially deadly and capable of making a future wife infertile if it spread to her could make any intelligent and cautious man think twice.

Servants and tenants of the estate are another simple and common answer. Less risk of stds, it can be based on actual attraction more than money (though money might still change hands), and is a bit more intimate. But Wickham’s called wicked for something very similar, when he dallies (whether he only got to serious flirting, kissing, or sleeping with them I don’t think we can conclusively say) with the common women of Meryton: “his intrigues, all honoured with the title of seduction, had been extended into every tradesman's family.” And it isn't as though Wickham had any personal duty towards those people beyond the claims of basic dignity. Darcy, who is shown to have such respect and understanding for his responsibilities towards the people of his estate and duties of a landlord, would keenly feel if any of his actions were leading his servants/tenants astray and down immoral paths. Servants, especially, were considered directly under the protection of the family whose house they worked in. I think it's undoubtable that Mrs Reynolds (whose was responsible for the wellbeing - both physically and spiritually - of the female servants) would not think so well of Mr Darcy if he had experimented with maids in his youth. It would reflect badly on her if a family entrusted their daughter to her care and she 'lost her virtue' under her watch. Daughters/widows of others living on the estate not under the roof of Pemberley House are a little more likely, but still, if he did have an affair with any of them I can only think it possible when he was much younger and did not feel his duties quite so strongly. Of course lots of real men didn't care about any of this, but Darcy is so far from being depicted as careless about his duties that the narrative makes a point of how exceptional his quality of care was. Frankly, it's undeniable that none of Jane Austen's heroes were flippant about their responsibilities towards those under their protection. I cannot serious entertain an interpretation that makes Darcy not, at his current age, at least, cognizant of the contemporary problems inherent in sleeping with servants or others on his estate.

A servant in a friend’s house would remove some of that personal responsibility, but transfer it to instead be leading his friend’s servants astray and in a manner which he is less able to know about if a child did result. That latter remains a problem even if we move the setting to his college, so not particularly likely for his character as we know it… though it wouldn’t be unusual for someone to be more unthinking and reckless in their teenage years than they are at twenty-eight so I don’t think having sex then can be ruled out. Kissing I can much more easily believe, especially when at Oxford or Cambridge, but every scenario of sleeping with a lower-class woman has some compelling arguments against it especially the closer we get to the time of the novel.

Men did of course also have affairs with women of ranks similar to their own, though given Jane Austen’s well-known feelings towards men who ‘ruined’ the virtue of young ladies we can safely say that Darcy never slept with an unwed middle- or upper-class woman. Any decent man would have married them out of duty if it got so far; but if he was the sort to let it get so far, I think it impossible Jane Austen would consider him respectable. Widows are a possibility, but again, the respectable thing to do would be to marry them. Perhaps a poorer merchant’s widow would be low enough that marriage is off the table but high enough that the ‘leading astray’ aspect loses its master-servant responsibilities (though the male-female ‘protect the gentler sex’ aspect remains) but his social circle didn’t facilitate meeting many ladies like that. Plus, an affair with a woman in society would remove many layers of privacy and anonymity that sex-workers and lower-class lovers provided by simply being unremarkable to the world at large. It carries a far greater risk of scandal and a heavier sense of immorality in the terms of respecting a woman’s purity which classism prevented from applying so heavily to lower-class women.

I think it’s important to note here that something that removes the need to think about duties of landlords towards the lower-classes or gentlemen towards gentlewomen is having affairs with other men of a similar rank. But, aside from the risk of scandal and what could be called the irresponsibility of engaging in illegal acts, it’s almost certain that Jane Austen would never have supported this. For a devout author in this era the way I’m calculating likelihoods makes it not even a possibility. But if you want to write a different fanfiction (and perhaps something like a break-up could explain why Darcy doesn’t seem to have any closer friend than someone whom he must have only met two or so years ago despite being in society for years before that) it does have that advantage over affairs with women of equal- and lower-classes. I support alternate interpretations entirely – it just isn’t how I’m deciding things in this instance.

I keep coming back to the conclusion that, at the very least, Darcy hasn’t had sex recently and it was never a common occurrence. It wouldn’t surprise me if Jane Austen felt he hadn’t done it ever. Kissing, as we can see from all the parlour games at the time, wasn’t viewed as harshly, so I think he’s likely made out with someone before. But in almost every situation it does seem that the responsible and religious thing to do (which Jane Austen values so highly) is for it to never have progressed to sex. I also don’t think it conflicts with his canon characterisation to say that he wouldn’t regard sexual experience as a crucial element of his life thus far, and his personality isn’t driven to pursue pleasure for himself, so it’s entirely possible that he would never go out of his way to seek it. So, I’m inclined to think that the authorial and textual evidence is in favour of Darcy being a virgin even if the real-world contemporary standard is the opposite. (Though both leave enough room for exceptions that I’m not going to argue with anyone who feels differently; and even if you agree with all my points, you might simply weight authorial intent/textual evidence/contemporary likelihoods differently than I do and come to a different conclusion).

Remember that even if Darcy is a virgin this wouldn’t necessarily equate to lack of knowledge, only experience. There were plenty of books and artwork focused on sex, and Darcy, studious man that he is, would no doubt pay attention to what knowledge his friends/male relatives shared. Though some of it (Looking especially at you, 'Fanny Hill, Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure') should NEVER be an example of appropriate practice for taking a woman's virginity. Darcy would almost certainly have been taught directly or learnt through exposure to other men talking to make sex good for a woman – it was a commonly held misconception (since Elizabethan England, I believe) that women had to orgasm to conceive. It would be in his interests as an empathetic husband, and head of a family, to know how to please his wife.

Basically, I’m convinced Darcy isn’t very experienced, if at all, and will be learning with Elizabeth. But he does have a lot of theoretical knowledge which he’s paid careful attention to and is eager to apply.

#sorry for how my writing jumps around from quoting sources to vaguely asserting things from the books I only write proper essays when forced #if anyone has evidence that Austen thought a sexually experienced husband was better/men needed sex/it's a crucial education for men/etc #PLEASE send it my way I'm so curious about this topic now #this is by no means an 'I trawled through every piece of evidence' post just stuff I know from studying the era and Austen and her work #so more info/evidence is always appreciated #I had sort of assumed the answer was 'not a virgin' when I first considered this months ago btw but the more I thought about it #the less I was able to find out when/where/who he would've slept with without running into some authorial/textual complication #so suddenly 'maybe a virgin' becomes increasingly likely #But the same logic would surely apply to ALL Austen's heroes... and Knightley is 38 which feels unrealistic #(though Emma doesn't have as much commentary on sex and was written when Austen was older so maybe she wasn't so idealistic about men then)#but authors do write unrealistic elements and it's entirely possible that *this* was something Austen thought a perfect guy would(n't) do #and if you've read my finances breakdowns you know I follow the text and authorial voice over real-world logic because it IS still fiction #no matter how deftly Austen set it in the real world and made realistic characters #pride and prejudice #jane austen #fitzwilliam darcy #mr darcy #discourse #austen opinions #mine #asks #fic:t3w #I'm going to need a tag for 'beneath the surface' but 'bts' is already a pretty popular abbreviation haha #just 'fic: beneath' maybe?? idk

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chiropteracupola · 1 year ago

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Creamthing d'or passant reguardant, by a sheaf of arrows percée ...and Montjoy also.

[creamthing is the creation of the inimitable @samsketchbook; despite this choice of adjective, I have nonetheless tried my best at a little heraldic creamthing]

#em draws stuff #creamthing #le roy d'armes des françois (dit montjoye)#<- look who has a montjoy tag now. only montjoy tagging because this is kind of nonsense.#sometimes the mood is creamthing heraldry. who can explain it who can tell you why.#midway through this piece I had a Weeping Session over the meaningfulness of like. Most of my art actually.#and then I took a break and redid the colors with sort of a red-yellow-blue forced focus which helped a lot #and also I decided that if you Believe in your silliness then it can be Meaningful Intertextuality.#the journey of creamthing. the journey of montjoy. creamthing as a pelican in its piety.#spent a Lot of time on heraldry wikipedia and then ancient archival scans of heraldry encyclopedias to try and get the description right #heraldic language is Hard and I still definitely didn't get it right but I Tried. and I like how it turned out :)

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blinkees · 4 months ago

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#post dividers #line dividers #borders #png #i dont do a lot of static stuff but i had an extra five minutes to kill before lunch #not enough to make a request but just enough to crank out some funny shapes #its supposed to look like interlinked shapes in a sort of chain pattern #but i dunno how well that comes across. hopefully its visually appealing at least

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toffee4you · 10 days ago

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Silver x Self-conscious Reader

Content: suggestive (mostly at the end), comfort, established relationship, mentions of sweat, mentions of blindfolding, pet name "My love", lots of kissing (+ brief love bites and kitten licks), the reader's chest is mentioned—pronouns are not. Take the gender as you will. Longer than my usual works (cramming in all of the features), NOT PROOF-READ (too long).

Mentioned Features: tan skin, chubby stomach and thighs, chubby cheeks, big forehead, taller than Silver, hip dips, shoulder freckles, flat chest, glasses (for close and far), dull-colored eyes and hair (interpretable), thin/short eyelashes, palmar hyperhidrosis (correct me if I write this wrong, I tried researching).

Features are mostly referenced towards the end. You can skip to reading the third attempt if it is too long. No singular feature was mentioned for too long since there was a lot to write on.

Body type was decided by asks.

The reader does mention their body features in a negative light, because that is the point of the fic. I do not endorse speaking that way. Silver's words do not mention them in a bad light, but most responses are suggestive because it is the theme... I believe he is most effective at acceptance through actions.

∆ If you sent an ask for this fanfic, but did not receive a response or your request did not appear here, considering checking the end notes.

For a while, you have been in a steady relationship with Silver. He is sweet, kind, attentive... But most importantly, he gives you space when you need it. He understands when you need time to recharge your social battery, or when you need a moment of silence after a stressful event. His respect for your boundaries becomes especially clear when it comes to intimacy. If the problem lies within him, he always takes responsibility.

The first time, it happened when the two of you were cuddling. Silver was nuzzled into you, pecking at the back of your neck and your collar. You reciprocated by running your fingers through his hair, indicative of your approval. After knowing you for so long, and with a mood that was just right, he figured this could be his chance to take the relationship to the next step. Maybe you had been thinking the same, but no one was brave enough to say it until now.

"My love, do you want to..?"

He looked up at you with half-lidded eyes, placid from the comfort you provided. Yet, he swore to himself he would stay awake if you really wanted this.

"To..?"

"...Go further with our relationship. Only if that is what you want. I could wait forever."

"Oh, you mean that? I..."

His brows furrowed upon registering the complicated expression on your face, lids opening wider to get a clearer look. Unlike before, your eyes were avoidant—guilty, even. He swore he could hear a sharp exhale leaving your mouth, one that signified repressed stress. Silver immediately sat up, rubbing your shoulders. It was his first priority to ensure your comfort, so he did not pry. He simply assumed you were not at that level of comfort with him right now.

"I apologize for asking, we don't have to do anything. I'm grateful enough that you trust me with your 'cuddle times'. Even so, I would love you regardless of what physical contact I receive."

Always quick to give a formal and sincere apology. Once your expression soften, he slowly nudged his head into your hand again, asking for permission to forget his words and return to the usual. For the rest of that night, your cuddling continued as if nothing happened. However, he did ask Lilia for some insight the next day, if only to avoid upsetting you again.

The second attempt came months later, when he felt you had become closer. It was night in his dorm room, just the two of you today. He invited you to spar in Diasomnia's training ground earlier, completely dominating the scores. Sometimes, he would let you win, but you were feeling humorous enough and asked him to "not hold back" this session. It went just as expected.

Now, the two of you were play-fighting with pillows, your boisterous laughter mixing with his quiet chuckles as blows were exchanged. He would let you win this time, as it was only fair. You stopped him from dodging by landing on top of him, waist clamped on either side by your legs. Then, whapped him straight in the face with his own pillow.

After landing that cathartic hit, you finally settled down, panting heavily from expending all of your energy today. Though Silver was trying his best to ignore it, you were practically straddling him and beading with sweat, the exhausted smile still on your face. Would there ever be a better time to try than now? As far as he knew, Lilia told him to "shoot his shot" when you're in high spirits, rather than a calm moment like the previous attempt... He gulped before finally deciding to ask again,

"...Would you be willing to give me a chance tonight? If you are tired, I can take the lead, or we could always wait until—-"

He abruptly swallowed his words when he saw that look on your face again. No time was wasted before he brought his hands to your face, massaging your cheeks while staring at you with an apologetic look in his eyes. This time, you had at least given him the faintest clue of reason;

"Sorry, I don't think I'm ready right now. I need to... work on my appearance, just a bit. Once I look better, I would be up for it."

A lie. You always repeated this to yourself, and now to him. It was always "next time", waiting for something to happen that would make you love your appearance more, like a potion or spell would change your every insecurity. Yet, it didn't matter how many times Silver gave honest compliments completely unprompted, or how he only ever looked at you with adoration. You couldn't shake the thought that he would somehow be disgusted with you if you ever went further—that he would come to a sudden realization of how he couldn't stand to even look at you. Even now, Silver was giving no such look, pulling you down to lay beside him as his arms circled around you. He didn't know what was processing through your head, but he also did not want you to apologize for his own misstep; he would provide comfort tonight as well, and respect your boundaries... Yet, something about your reasoning concerned him. Something that triggered a distinct feeling that he should not ignore this issue and allow it to fester.

The third time, which Lilia proudly told him would be "the charm", was spaced out longer than the last. That was because Silver had been paying special attention to your behavior.

Your clothes always covered most of your body, your hair styled to cover facial features, and you wore shoes that would avoid adding height.

He had always assumed it was your sense of fashion, and didn't bother to question it.

Whenever you visited the washrooms, you spent longer than usual in the mirrors, rubbing at your features with a frown on your face.

He never stared in the washroom, even if you were only washing your hands or applying makeup. He knew it was basic decency to give others a sense of privacy. Thus, he never noticed.

Now that he was paying attention, it came clear to him what the issue was: it is not that you lacked comfort with him, it was a lack of comfort with yourself. Despite the love that you show him, and the care that you show to others around you, there was a distinct lack of such a thought for your body. The guilt had begun to eat away at him in an instant, his mind filled with questions. How could he not have noticed? When he confessed, he swore to always protect your happiness, yet he allowed this issue to cultivate unknowingly.

Silver asked you to visit his dorm that night, surprisingly, using his phone to text for once. He gave you time to settle in, brewing tea for the two of you to drink together. Once you winded down, he sat on the edge of the bed with you. It was the usual routine for calm nights. You would typically cuddle afterwards, then fall asleep together.

That was not what he planned for tonight. The only thing occupying his mind was striking down your worries, with the speed and precision expected of any trained knight.

Slowly, he angled his body to face you, holding your gloved hands in his.

"I won't ask of anything intimate from you tonight, but I want to help you. You... Do not seem too fond of your appearance. What is it? Tell me, is there something I can do? You know I would never judge you. You're beautiful to me."

Your expression was troubled, but not as uncomfortable as before. You stared into your lap, fingers twitching between the decision to pull back or savor the contact. There was a certain burning sensation in your throat, as if the simple act of speaking would cause you to choke. But you decided to be brave today and test the waters.

"...Don't you think it's weird how I'm taller than you? Than most of the guys here?"

Your words left him confused. He leaned his head against you, slow enough to where you could back away had you wished. He answered with his sincere opinion. The one he always carried since he first fell in love.

"I see no issue with your height. It won't hinder my vow to protect you, and it only means there is more of you to cherish. Besides... I am quite fond of being embraced by your long arms, and tangled among your long legs."

"-—Then, my skin? You wouldn't prefer it any lighter?"

"Your skin tone is gorgeous. Do you truly believe I have never thought about dragging my fingers across it? In fact, I would not mind at all if you decided to tan further... Perhaps we are long overdue for a beach trip."

His face nuzzled into your side, a small smile gracing his lips as you locked eyes.

"I'll... Try to take your word for it. But compared to you, you're still leagues above me. I don't understand why you chose me, rather than someone else, sometimes. Just look—you have unique eyes, and shining, silver hair. My features are just boring compared to you."

His smile faltered. Boring? How could you say that about yourself?

"You are not boring. The color of my hair or eyes has nothing to do with your natural beauty. I could stare into your eyes forever, run my fingers through your hair until they go numb... If your colors were 'boring', then we should consider the woodland animals boring as well—and we both know that would be a lie. To me, your eyes are as lovely as a doe's, and your hair is like the feathers of a finch."

Silver knew you doted on the woodland animals just as much as he did. It was his compensation for his difficulties with expressing through words. The complete lack of judgement in his voice and eyes did provide a sense of relief. Maybe, you would be willing to talk everything through with him, allow him to unwrap one insecurity at a time.

You dragged the collar of your shirt to expose the shoulders, showing him the freckled skin. Biting down on your lip in a nervous instinct, you waited to see if he would be fine with this, as well.

"I never noticed... Would you be willing to show me this part of yourself more often? They are like stars against your skin—- No, far more precious. I would cherish a part of you before anything else in this universe."

...Maybe the only exception would be his family, to which you were considered equally important, but still; his point stood. He already saw you as an inseparable part of his life, so there was no reason for him to hate any part of your appearance. He hoisted himself up, causing you to lean back ever so slightly. You could feel his lips brushing against your shoulder in small pecks, an almost ticklish sensation. He finally managed to earn a quiet chuckle from you, your smile following suit.

"Okay, okay, I understand!... Then, you don't mind my facial features either?"

"...Which ones?"

It was likely a "no" if he had to ask, but you decided to get it off your chest anyways. If you didn't, you knew a small part of your mind would continue to believe that Silver would find it unsightly.

"My cheeks are chubby. And, unlike a doe, I don't have long eyelashes."

His hands swiftly moved up to cup your cheeks, as if it was some sort of emergency. Then, slowing down, he massaged them with his thumbs. A therapeutic sensation.

"That only means they are warmer, and softer. I think it is quite adorable how you remind me of a hamster when you eat."

That would certainly explain the soft pinches or rubs he gives to your cheeks whenever you eat... Or, whenever you puff them in general. Your pouts have never failed to raise a chuckle from him, so long as you were never truly upset.

"As for your eyelashes, they allow a far better view of your eyes. Tell me, how much of my eyes can you see?"

You squinted. His lidded expression did not help with the visibility, as charming as it was.

"I—- Alright. MAYBE you have a point. I only see half of them. But they're still pretty."

Silver's lips tenderly pressed against the lid of your eye an action of both gratitude and appreciation, then moved up to your forehead. He certainly took his time there, refusing to take a single break before he had left a brief kiss on every inch of it.

"...And your forehead, it is more surface for my lips to treasure with kisses."

He left a final peck on your nose before pulling back with a proud grin. To see you make a step towards self-acceptance was enough of an achievement in his eyes.

"Is there anything else I may prove to you, my love?"

His tone dropped to a whisper near your ear, your encouraging caress against his cheek sparking an increasingly intimate mood.

"I recall Sebek saying you like girls with big chests. Huge."

You freed your hands from his face, making an exaggerated motion over your chest to which he shook his head. You believe there might have been a hint of annoyance in the way his left brow twitched, but not at you.

"I will have... a talk with Sebek later. I assure you, your chest is quite flattering as it is. Will you allow me to demonstrate?"

He was finally making his move, his fingers pre-placed on the topmost button of your shirt. Once you gave him a nod, he gently worked his way down, leaving the bottom buttons intact. His hands slid up your back before you felt the warm press of his lips against the top of your chest. They were short, loving kisses, trailing down the valley and pressing into the inner sides. He only ever paused to see your reaction, earning another pet on the head.

Realization hit him like a block of galvanized square steel. You were affirming the idea of intimacy. He nuzzled into your wrist, teeth brushing against the rim of your gloves. Your hand moved back instinctively, feeling the need to "warn" him first.

"Silver, I think you would want me to leave my gloves on. They will feel very unpleasant for you, and you'll get all dirty."

"Why is that? Any touch from your hands would be pleasant to me. Even in my dreams, I would never consider it 'dirty'."

"...They're extremely sweaty. Like, drenched in sweat, no matter what I do."

"I assure you, we will both be drenched with sweat after we're finished."

At that, he clamped the glove between his teeth, tugging it off. His cheek leaned back into your hand again. His expression did not give way to a single sign of discomfort at the wetness against his skin.

"...And my glasses. I have to keep my glasses on. Or else I won't be able to see you. Your expression would look like a paint smudge, and everything else would be a blur."

"They frame your eyes like a portrait. There is no issue with leaving them on... Though, if your glasses cause discomfort to wear, may I suggest an alternative solution?"

"I highly doubt you can cast a spell for improved vision, but go on."

"Not at all, but if you would prefer it... I believe a blindfold would look lovely on you. There would be no need to worry about seeing; you only need to focus on my voice and touch."

Hearing "creatively" intimate suggestions from Silver was a slight shock, causing a very subtle blush to dust your cheeks. While he often missed innuendos and dirty jokes, he was also not completely oblivious to the topic.

"I might leave them on for now, while we're still warming up. I might just take you up on that suggestion later, though."

His face visibly lit up at your decision—the best of both worlds. He could see your appearance with glasses for just a bit longer, but you also did not shy away from the offer. After leaving a quick "thank you" kiss on your cheek, he slid off the bed, taking a knee in front of you.

"My love, I would like to unbutton the rest of your shirt... Will you allow me? Your arms have been wrapped around your stomach for quite some time."

You made the mistake of locking contact with his pleading eyes. It was as if he had spent countless nights waiting for this moment, which, he really had. With a defeated sigh, you moved your arms away with a hint of reluctance.

"If you don't like what you see, you can always put the buttons back on. I won't judge."

He was halfway through the last few buttons by the time you finished your sentence, his face buried in your stomach. There was no way he was putting any of the buttons back on as long as you remained comfortable. His mouth left kisses and painless love bites, relentless in their motion as he finished undoing the last of the buttons. But he didn't pull back, not yet. His hands held your sides for support as he pressed deeper into you, kisses turning into kitten licks. Only for a little while.

Silver's head began to bob again, and though you couldn't see his face, you could feel his movements slowing down. You had to pull him back to keep him awake, patting his cheek.

"Silver, you can't fall asleep now."

You reminded him with a lighthearted tone, watching his eyes fight to open again. Even if he did fall asleep, you would just wait for him to wake up again. Silver, on the other hand, was not too fond at the thought of waiting longer. He leaned against your legs, fingers slipping through the waistband. There was no movement to pull it off yet, but only his eyes staring into yours for any signs of insecurities.

"I won't fall asleep, not now... Not when there is still more for me to admire."

"...Please don't force yourself. My hips aren't 'normal', and my thighs don't look as slender as they should be..."

A pause, stealing a quick glance for his reaction. His brows furrowed in return, fingers feeling the hips under your clothes. He began to rub his fingers in circular motions, massaging the flat surface.

"You're right, they feel better than normal, quite pleasant to hold. And your thighs..."

His hands slid the waistband down, carefully observing your movements for any signs of discomfort. The fabric dropped to the ground, allowing a clear view of your legs. Silver had to take a sharp inhale, his fingers twitching. It took every fiber of his being to not just unceremoniously dive his face down. Instead, he rested his chin on your legs, a pleading look on his face.

"It's soft, and warm... If they 'should' be any other way, I suppose our world is backwards. Will you allow me further in? I promise I will do everything in my power to stay awake. And, if I fall asleep... Wake me however you wish."

You took initiative at his words, cupping his head to press against your legs. A soft breath left his mouth, as if all of worries left his body just now. Not from training today, or from his studies, but the relief of knowing you had given him the opportunity to soothe all of your insecurities. In the chance that he found any more that night? Rest assured, it would be the last thing on your mind.

∆ End Notes

Tumblr does not allow me to use private responses for anonymous asks. I set guidelines for the sake of user privacy, which stated that I will not post your ask publicly if I am not explicitly given permission. However, I still read through all of the requests and included them. If I portrayed your ask incorrectly, do not be afraid to send out another ask; just ensure you provide an explanation so I understand.

If you sent an ask and it did not appear in this fanfic, Tumblr might have eaten it. You can re-send an ask or DM your request to have it added. If the requested body feature clashes with any of the listed features, I can make another post with a different combination.

I will reblog this post with responses to some of the most common statements I received in asks. Not the body features, just extra questions or concerns some asks mentioned that I could not respond to.

#RumiWrites #I think the term cuddle time would be coined by the reader but also used by Silver since it just became normalized.#This was written across four different days so. If you notice personality changes in dialogue. That's why. & I tried making dialogue casual #the original plan was to start from attempt three #I.E. don't explain the other attempts. Just mention them in a sentence or three. Then move on to him noticing the unhealthy behavior #and the rest is history #but noooo #I had to go longer.#I had so many ideas and asks to smush into one fic that I fear. It may be a little oddly paced.#I think people prefer shorter formatted stories #I was about to have second thoughts about writing suggestive with features then I remembered #I already stated it would be suggestive so everyone who sent an ask is (should be) chill with it anyways.#either way，I tried to strike a middle ground and not go completely downbad.#twst x reader #twst scenarios #twst fanfic #twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted x reader #twisted wonderland #silver twisted wonderland #twst silver #twisted wonderland silver #silver x reader #silver twst #silver vanrouge #twst silver x reader #suggestive #x reader #I had to hold my hand back from moving on its own to make all sorts of innuendos and other out-of-character suggestive stuff.

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ismyteadoneyet · 1 month ago

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~ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴀ sᴏʟᴅɪᴇʀ ᴡʜᴏ ᴄᴀʀʀɪᴇs ᴀ ᴍɪɢʜᴛʏ sᴡᴏʀᴅ,

ʜᴇ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴛᴇᴀʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄɪᴛʏ ᴅᴏᴡɴ, ᴏʜ-ʟᴇɪ ᴏʜ-ʟᴀɪ ᴏʜ ʟᴏʀᴅ ~

FELLOW LEGENDBORNIANS !! I'M BACK !! I may not be very active in the Legendborn spaces, but that's because I STILL HAVEN'T READ OATHBOUND 😭😭 I miss my lil goofs so much 🥺

Life has really taken its toll on both me and my reading-buddy, and we're still slowly but surely making our way through Bloodmarked. I HAVE seen some fanarts already from the new book and I am SALIVATIINNNGGGG 🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌 I just know that once I actually crack that book open I will absolutely devour it djsbdbhsbdj 🤭🤭

And THEN the fanarts shall follow not so very close behind, trust 🫡🫡

I have SO MANY three-people pose pictures saved on pinterest for referencing-reasons, and this is the first one of the bunch! 🤭🥳

Hope y'all have a great day ! 🩷🩷🩷

#legendborn #legendborn fanart #bree matthews #nick davis #selwyn kane #i'm so happy with how this came out actually bdbsjbdjsb #i don't usually use photo references so this is good practice for me #also realized right after finishing bree that i should have had her liggyback Sel instead 😭😭#but oh well hdjsbjdbs maybe this will get a part 2 lmao #i'm also really happy with the shoes like ??? BRO #and the clothes in general ngl #nick's arm is looking a lil wonky but ykno?? next time I'll get it right for sure #all the MOUTHS THOOOO #like imagine how long I've been struggling with that sht omg #and NOW?? EASIEST THING IN THE WORLD (almost)#crazy when stuff just *clicks* and then you've suddenly unlocked a whole new skill just like that gdsjbdhs #one of my best friends also send me a post with simply the “🫵” emoji #about how artists who have not been drawing in a while get unwatered-plant-sad until they pick up drawing again #and ye I might just fkn print and frame that post because the accuracy is killing me lmao #Tavi should know that that post will forever haunt me as soon as I feel the slightest bit down like #“oh the sads have arrived” “fck when was the last time I doodled something??”#my art #if you read all of these tags - have a cookie 🍪!#omg also - fun fact - this is the first Legendborn fanart I've done in Clip Studio Paint ???#I went into the app to sort this intonthe LBC folder and hadn't realized it was the first one !!! 😭😭

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fumifooms · 1 year ago

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Kaka compilation

Because everyone is sleeping on him. Witness his greatness!! First two Kaka colored icons were colored by me, lineart by Ryoko Kui though!

Kaka & Kiki are kinda like Laios & Falin… Kaka being stoic and giving repressed energy like early Laios, Kiki being cryptic and always smiling and kinda soft-looking. Autism siblings 2, ostracized and othered as kids and have a deep bond due to sticking together through it all, though unlike with Laios their parents are very loving so Kaka developed family as a big value more than Laios (bc asides for Falin Laios doesn’t care much about it).

In the gnome festival comic you can see Kaka is more emotive than he seems! Full with a :3 face, and he’s the one crying at the end. He’s insecure about his legs and being tall… It really got to him. Conceal don’t feel. In the gnome festival comic you also see him sensing others’ gaze on him and that something is off unlike Kiki, again Laios-like in the way that judgement from others gets to him more than her.

#The twins are so autistic swag #A falin just as chilled out and smiling and a laios who never stopped repressing #They’re so neurodivergent and they’re allowed to just exist I love you Kui. Kaka is just literally me #I looove characters that are hard to know and hard to read/easily misunderstood. They’re my favorite thing #LOOK AT THE WAY HE SMILES THE WAY HE BLUSHESSS HE’S PERFECT and I would take a harpoon to the chest for him thank u #I do love Kiki too btw but I’ve been seeing her in fancontent and posts way more than Kaka so I had to give him some spotlight #But also Laios is my fave of the Toudens so this very much checks out #Their pre-Flokes story would be interesting to analyze too #Dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #kaka floke #Kaka #Kiki and kaka #floke twins #As you may guess from my new-ish icon I am in my kaka era #ALSO I SWEAR TO GOD STOP BEING MEAN ABOUT HIS NAME #KA IS A SYLLABLE IN MY IRL NAME. YES I WAS BULLIED AND CALLED KAKA AS A KID. MY NAME ALSO MEANS UGLY STUFF IN A DIFFERENT LANGUAGE #KAKA’S A PRETTY NAME I’LL DIE ON THIS HILL. IT’S NOT WEIRD IF YOU DON’T MAKE IT WEIRD #Oh also another laios falin parallel: they both sort-of-date the same woman

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basket-of-radiants · 1 month ago

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Why were you so disappointed by Rhythm of War?

This has been sitting in my askbox for years. I've taken several cracks at answering, only to get frustrated with the subject matter and burn myself out every time. I didn't like Rhythm of War. More than that, I didn't like it in a way that tainted my enjoyment of the entire series. And despite what it may seem, I don't actually enjoy discussing things which I don't like. I always want to talk from a place of good faith. Which is why now that my feelings towards the series are a little more positive, I think I can finally answer this.

I'm going to try to stay away from specific plotpoints and story beats for this post, because my goal isn't to nitpick (if for no other reason than it would take a week to write this post), I'm just looking to talk about my overall impressions. I think that might mean the only spoilers here will be structural? idk, if you haven't read Rhythm of War yourself then you should probably do that before looking for other people's opinions anyway.

I liked Way of Kings when I first read it. I didn't love it at the time, but I liked it. Certainly enough to keep reading once I'd finished. One thing that made me a bit uncomfy, however, was the war against the Parshendi. They were this unknowable enemy which the book was not interested in knowing. An inhuman army. Their main purpose was to kill Kaladin's friends, or else be killed by Dalinar's armies. And yet the Parshendi, and the parshmen in the form of Shen, did show hints of personhood. And so it bothered me how Dalinar spoke so casually about how the Alethi had decimated their numbers, how the others used the war as a means to amass wealth and power. (It didn't bother me in a "this is a bad book" way but in a "these characters are bad people" way.)

One of my foibles as a reader is that when a book is very clearly treating one side of a conflict with more humanity, I tend to be a bit predisposed towards the other to account for that. And with the Alethi clearly being the invading party and superior military force, there was also some underdog favoritism. I didn't really like how the book treated the Parshendi. This is to say that going forward, the singers would be more important to me than any other through line.

So imagine my delight at reading Words of Radiance and meeting Eshonai, one of the Parshendi, who even gets her own point of view sections! They were no longer being treated as a faceless mass, we were getting to see things from their perspective as well. And it became plain to see the damage the Alethi had done to them. I couldn't really bring myself to root for Dalinar or really any of the humans against the listeners. I couldn't even bring myself to like most of these characters. I still enjoyed the book but once it became clear there wouldn't be a peaceful conclusion, let's just say that I wouldn't have wept for Dalinar and Adolin if Szeth had managed to off them. Like everyone in the book, I assumed that going forward all the parshmen would be turned into evil voidbringers in the everstorm and that the listeners were mostly dead. Except for Rlain, and Eshonai because I'd read or been told that book 4 would be Eshonai's book and thus had assumed she was fine. (Oathbringer spoilers, she was not fine.) So ultimately it was still a bit of a downer way to end the book.

So imagine my delight at reading Oathbringer, where for the first time singers were being treated as people, full and real people, and where the human characters could no longer ignore or dismiss them. We met Khen and the others, common singers who were sympathetic and just wanted freedom from bondage. We see Venli grapple with the loss of her home. We see Leshwi and Moash connecting with and understanding one another. We learn of a history where singers were the original inhabitants of the planet. Parallel to this, Dalinar is having a truly excellent character arc about confronting one's past actions and acknowledging them to move forward and do better. I loved Oathbringer, for some years it was my favorite book, and I was excited as hell to see what came next. At the time, it seemed to me that there is a clear direction the story is going. Two books about needless war, and then a third where the main cast is forced to acknowledge the personhood of their enemies. This was so cool, all of my feelings from the previous installments were being validated, the characters were going to have to face what they've done in the past and outgrow their militaristic mindsets, I was so sure of that.

Imagine my disappointment when that does not even remotely resemble the direction the story went in Rhythm of War. RoW presented a clear, straightforward “us vs. them" narrative, where every character was totally fine with killing singers. Characters aligned with the singers were either flattened into wholly evil versions of themselves (Moash) or were expected to turn on their side in favor of the humans (Venli.) Because clearly there was no reason good people would be on the side that's all former slaves trying to stay free. Maybe there's some sort of accord or understanding between Navani and Raboniel that I might have found meaningful if the seeds of mutual understanding weren't already there in Oathbringer and then apparently ignored for a year by all the characters.

I have a lot of issues with how the listeners are handled in these books. (Here's some elaboration.) Following OB, I had thought that all my concerns were going to be addressed. Following RoW, I knew they never would be.

Which is my main complaint, because that's the thread that matters most to me in this series.

I have a lot of other Things as well. Gonna just talk about a few big ones.

One outsized source of disappointment that may seem a little petty, and which probably is, is that I felt mislead by the premise of the book. It had been announced that this book would center Venli and Eshonai, and I was unbelievably hyped for that. That did not really turn out to be the case. The purpose for their backstory chapters felt less about exploring them as people and contextualizing their arcs, and more about filling in gaps of world history. In the main plot, Venli was a POV character and she certainly played a role, but honestly not a very important one overall. To me she felt like a side character in her own book. I don't think it's controversial to say that the main character of RoW was Navani. A lot of people really like Navani and are happy about that. Unfortunately I'm not one of those people, and I found it all the more difficult to enjoy her when it felt like it was coming at the expense of some of my favorite characters.

This particular gripe somewhat comes down to preference, obviously everyone prefers to read about characters they like more than those they don't, and it can go both ways. (For instance, on a craft/technical level RoW is probably the superior book to W&T, but I liked the latter a lot more because of my stupidly outsized attachment to Szeth and Nale.) But I do think there's something of a real criticism in how the book would rather focus on the feelings of a queen rather than those of a genocide survivor, and how the former's are given significantly more weight and import. It ties in with my main criticism, I think.

And then there's how human/human racism had also been wholly cast aside as a plot point. Jasnah fixed slavery so that's resolved, and the only person who still cares about structural racism is the evil bad bad evil villain Moash/Vyre, who is now wholly irredeemable and who you're allowed to totally write off because he's sold his soul to Odium. I've already talked a lot about this. Other people have already talked about this, probably better than me. The writing was actually on the wall for me in OB, but again, RoW was when I fully accepted that this was never going to be addressed.

There's something else that probably deserves its own discussion rather than being quickly tacked on at the end here, but here we are. This book changed how the series approaches war.

In WoK, war was very clearly portrayed as a bad and inglorious thing. It was brutal, it was painful, those at the bottom died cruelly and unceremoniously and pointlessly while those at the top turned a profit. Every day was a new horror. The enemy were never evil, they were always just more people forced to go through the same thing. Through the next couple books, it felt to me that even if the characters had accepted war as necessary, there was still a tragedy to it. Conversely, in RoW (and W&T) war is basically a series of boss battles, in between which our protagonists can kill dozens of footsoldiers with barely a thought in the same way WoK had criticized.

Final note on all this, it sucks how we have no perspectives from the former-slaves-singers demographic. Those guys are really thrown under the bus, and seemingly get no self-determination now or ever. It was a glaring problem to me in RoW. Conscripted and enslaved humans and singers probably have just as much ground to form mutual understanding as a fused and a queen. (In fact they already had. In Oathbringer.)

In essence, RoW disappointed me because it left me with the distinct impression that none of the series's most important through lines (well, most important to me) were going to be resolved well. I liked W&T, but I haven't revised my opinion very much about the overall handling of these topics across the series. Maybe one of the reasons I was able to enjoy W&T so much more was because I no longer had such high expectations.

#sorry i sorta need to get this stuff off my chest to unpack my feelings about the series.#i hope posting this out of the blue doesn't come across as too mean spirited. my sensitivity reader DID sign off on it.#(that is a joke. although i do let my sister look over any 1000+ word posts ahead of time. and i would respect any disapproval from her.#but normally she just tells me i'm allowed to be more forceful in my opinions without qualifying them or apologizing all the time. pfff.#the reason i've been hesitant to write any especially spoilery w&t meta is mostly because she hasn't read it yet.)#discourse #asks #hey anon if you're still here after all these years. thank you.#at the time i was kinda fishing for an ask like this bc i wanted to vent but it felt mean to do so unprompted #of course this was still really hard to write. mostly because every time i tried i completely spiraled.#the version of this post that was sitting in my drafts was honestly a lot better than this one. in basically every way. except.#except it was nearly the same length and all i'd gotten to was the oathbringer paragraph #below which was a stupidly thorough outline of my itemized complaints #you KNOW i don't care about brevity but my god that would have taken forever to write and finish #and i did not want to spend that sort of time with a book i didn't like. which i would have had to do to get all my planned citations #sorry past self. you were clearly writing from a place of much more passion and that made your work better than mine. and yet.#so as i said. i'm only writing this bc i now like the series enough to talk about it again. sincerely not trying to be a hater.#side note: if any of you have thoughts/opinions about the shift in the way war is used in these books. i would love to hear them. lets chat

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skyward-floored · 9 months ago

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Whumptober Day 11: seeing double

Totally not what this prompt meant, but I don’t care lol. I do care that I keep making Wild cry though, sorry buddy 😬

No clue if anyone cares anymore, but this has some brief age of calamity spoilers in it. Just a heads up.

Warnings: broken bone, discussed past character death

Ao3 link

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wild had two thoughts as he went plunging through the portal, the others’ frantic cries in his ears:

One, that hopefully Legend wouldn’t give him too smug of an ‘I told you so’ the next time he saw him, since Wild had entirely forgone his advice to stay away from Dark Link and was now plunging rapidly through the air. And two, well, at least I’m going to fall into the water down there.

Which he promptly did with an explosive splash.

It wasn’t so high up that he was badly hurt, but Wild was still thrown for a loop, and found himself crashing down a river with little sense of which way was up.

Water got in his mouth and he spluttered, trying to spit it out and also get his head above the surface so he could breathe. The current was fast here though, and Wild couldn’t do much except flail around like a drunk Zora.

Wait, could Zora get drunk?

He actually had no clue.

The current got suddenly faster, and Wild breathed in some water as he got smacked against the rocks, coughing and hacking as he struggled to get any air. He managed a wet gasp when his head briefly poked up, but then he was pulled under again.

Air wasn’t the only thing Wild had gotten when he went up though— he’d also gotten a sight of the river up ahead. And at the sight of the waterfall rapidly approaching, his struggles grew even more frantic.

I need to reach shore, he thought as he continued to cough and claw his way to the river’s edge in a panic. I need to reach shore now, I need air I need—

The angle of the water shifted, and Wild was shot out of the waterfall, the rapid change in direction making his head spin.

He found himself in open air, water still in his lungs, and he clumsily grabbed for his paraglider as the lake below rapidly approached. Wild managed to snap it open just in time, but he didn’t manage a good grip on the handle.

His arm slipped, and Wild slammed into the sand near the shore, a choked yell escaping him as pain blazed up his shoulder.

All he could do was cough up water for a minute and catch his breath, trying not to wrench his shoulder more. Something was broken in there; he wasn’t sure if it was his shoulder itself or his arm or collarbone, but it hurt. He could barely move without his whole arm lighting up in agony, and hoped blearily that none of the others had suffered the same fate as him.

Then he heard a splash behind him, and his stomach sank.

Had one of the others fallen in the portal already? Or was it something else? That hadn’t sounded big enough to be a splash from something falling from the waterfall, but then again, he could be wrong.

“There, look!”

The voice sounded familiar, but Wild couldn’t place it over the sound of the water behind him and the blood rushing in his ears. He tried to raise himself up, and pain tore across his senses, and for a minute all he could focus on was the fire ripping through his shoulder.

“—know who he is? He looks just like—”

“—in the water, don’t—”

Two voices floated around his head as the fire eased, and Wild took a deep breath, opening his eyes again. His hair had fallen in his face, and between that and his blurry vision he couldn’t see much, especially through the damp strands. Unless he moved again, but that seemed like a bad idea.

Wild groaned, blinking to try and get the hair away from his eyes, but he barely succeeded. His wet hair slipped to the side, but all he could make out were two blobs, silhouetted by the sun shining behind them.

Then he heard a soft gasp, and the sound of a weapon being drawn.

“How is this—”

“This has trap written all over it,” a different voice than the first interrupted, soft, but sharp. Cold steel nudged Wild’s chin, and he stiffened. “Don’t go near him.”

The other voice made a worried noise as Wild weakly coughed. “I don’t think he would have fallen down a waterfall on purpose and hurt himself like this if that were true.”

“It could still be a trick.”

“I know... but we won’t get any answers if he’s too dazed to speak.”

Wild heard a huff, then the sound of footsteps padding towards him in a familiar way. A hand settled over his shoulder, and Wild groaned again, a soothing noise coming from the voice.

“Hold on just a moment.”

Then a feeling like that of a gentle stream swept over his shoulder, quiet and small, but carrying the mighty power of water along with it. Wild automatically relaxed, sinking into the bubbly feeling. A blue light flickered in his vision, healing his shoulder in a familiar way, and Wild relaxed even further before he abruptly stiffened again.

Wait...

The smooth magic trickled into his middle, down to where his lungs were still burning from the water he’d inhaled. It soothed the ache, and though Wild still felt exhausted, he could tell his shoulder had been completely fixed as well. Even the various scrapes and bruises from the fight before the river had been healed.

Which meant...

The bubbly rush of magic faded away, Wild’s vision fully cleared, and his stomach dropped out.

Red scales. Yellow eyes. A petite figure covered in scales that were smooth and shiny in the sunlight, and healing magic that was fading from slender hands.

“M... Mipha?” Wild choked out.

The Zora woman (it couldn’t be Mipha, it couldn’t—) gave him a concerned look, but before Wild could do or say anything further, the steel was back at his neck.

Wild stilled, and followed the blade resting at his neck up to the person holding it. His already fast heartbeat tripled, and he choked for a second time.

The person holding a blade at his throat was himself.

His double’s hair was much shorter, pulled back into a neat ponytail, and instead of the champion’s tunic he was wearing the Zora armor Wild had received. His eyes were steely as he watched Wild, but the most shocking thing about him was the fact that the right side of his face was entirely smooth.

He didn’t have a single one of the scars that had killed Wild.

I’m unconscious. I’m dreaming. I hit my head on a rock and I’m hallucinating—

“Explain yourself. Who are you?” his double demanded, not appearing to notice how Wild’s world was caving in on itself. Wild stared, and coughed once, still feeling tired from his fight with the river, and just... unable to process this. What could he even say?

What was going on?

“I asked you a question, who are you? What are you doing in Zora’s Domain?” his double repeated, voice even sharper.

Mipha sucked in a worried breath as she stared at Wild, and touched the double’s arm. “Oh no, did... did a little guardian bring you?” she asked, and Wild stared at her, her words jumbling in his head as he stared.

Mipha.

Mipha was alive here. Wild was alive here, and missing his scars, and wearing the Zora armor that Mipha had crafted to give to him as a—

“Wh... who are you?” Wild whispered, throat suddenly dry as bone. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe it was just a mistake, a strange coincidence, but he— he had to know. He had to know.

“We asked you first,” Link’s double replied suspiciously, and Mipha set a hand on his shoulder.

“Link, he was just injured and half-drowned, I believe he’s confused. If he were here to kill us, he already would have tried,” she said pointedly, studying Wild with an intent look. “I think he looks too much like you to be a coincidence.”

“It could still be a trick. A Yiga or something,” his double said suspiciously. Wild didn’t blame him. That did sound like something the Yiga would do.

“But why add the scars and long hair?” Mipha countered, and the double looked frustrated.

“To confuse us, I’m sure there’s a motive. He’s probably here for you, you know you’re—”

“If you say “at risk” again Link, I will set Sidon on you,” Mipha said with a little huff, and turned back towards Wild with a kind-if-cautious look. “My apologies. I am Princess Mipha of the Zora, and this is my husband, Link.”

The words were like a slap, even though Wild knew they were coming.

Husband. Mipha. Zora armor.

Husband.

Link.

Wild would have fallen over backwards if he’d been upright in any way, and he stared between Mipha and his double, wondering if he was about to be sick.

They all knew the portals were transporting them through time. Wild had been a part of Time and Wind’s discussion on fractured timelines, and they all knew that there were splits and sections where the history of Hyrule didn’t make sense.

But this...

Was this a timeline where Wild hadn’t failed?

Mipha’s face grew more worried the longer Wild stared at them without speaking, and even his double started to look a little concerned.

“Did I miss an injury?” Mipha asked, scooting closer again, and Wild froze as she approached.

“No, no you got— you got everything,” Wild choked out. He felt perfectly healthy apart from being tired and his falling-apart mental state, just like if he’d used Mipha’s grace. Even though he hadn’t used it in nearly a year because the champions were finally at rest and they’d passed on and Mipha—

Wild lurched to his feet, using a rock for support, and immediately the other Link’s blade was raised again.

“Stay where you are,” he said sharply, and Wild stumbled backwards towards the water. His double’s face grew fierce and he leapt around him and blocked him off from the river. “I said stay where you are! We’ve told you who we are, now tell us your identity or I will treat you as a threat.”

Wild stilled, and swallowed. He might as well explain.

“I’m... well, Link,” he began, and the other Link didn’t move. “You... probably figured that out. I... I don’t know how I got here— I mean, I do, but it wasn’t on purpose, I-I... I don’t know what you mean about a guardian, but one didn’t bring me here.”

Wild looked at Mipha again, and swallowed thickly, his eyes stinging.

“This isn’t a trap. I don’t know what’s going on, but I’m not here to hurt you,” he croaked, and the other Link pulled his sword back just a hair. “I— my companions and I are traveling through time, but... I think something went wrong,” he finished in a whisper.

We’ve never had anything like this happen with the portals before.

Did the Shadow do this?

“Time travel...” Mipha said thoughtfully, and exchanged a loaded look with the other Link.

His face had creased further, but in a different way, and he finally pulled the sword away from Wild’s neck. He kept it at the ready though, and watched Wild intensely.

“How did you get here?” he asked again, a little less accusatory and a little more curious.

Wild exhaled. “It’s a long story... but it was through a portal,” he said, deciding he would just... ignore what was going on for now. It was that or completely freak out, and he wanted to know more before passing out due to shock. “My group is hunting a Shadow, one ripping holes in time. We’re trying to stop him.”

“So no Terrako then?” Link questioned, and Wild shook his head in confusion.

“No? No... Terrako. Just portals that sometimes spew powerful monsters.”

Link and Mipha both stiffened.

“These monsters, do they have darkened blood?” Mipha asked, and Wild nodded. “Oh my. We’ve seen some up in the highlands, remember that moblin, Link?”

Link grimaced. “Yes. What a disaster. We assumed it was just leftover magic from Astor or something of that nature, not... time travel related. Bazz is still recovering.” He paused for a second, then his eyes went wide and he whipped his head back towards Link. “You said you came through a portal that expels these monsters?”

“Yeah, from upriver somewhere,” Wild nodded. “But it’s not sending out monsters right now. I fell through it, then fell right in the river.”

Link frowned. “So no monsters were coming out when you went through?”

“No, they were all on the other side, my group was fighting their leader. But I don’t know—”

“Papa?”

Link froze, and Mipha looked worried as Wild turned around towards where the voice had come from.

A young, orangey colored Zora was poking his head up from the water, and he looked between Wild and Link, a wide look on his face.

“Papa?” he repeated in a curious voice, and Wild stared, studying the little Zora’s features.

“Stay in the water, Ty,” Link said seriously, and the Zora hesitated, eyes darting between Mipha and Link and Wild. Then he hopped out and scurried over to stand next to Mipha. He hid behind her leg and watched Wild with large blue eyes, and Wild began to shake, recognizing them as his own.

Oh Hylia, haven’t you put me through enough?

Mipha put a hand on Ty’s arm, and he continued to watch Wild, his expression concerned as he studied his face.

“Papa... hurt?” he said worriedly, and Link shifted around so he was standing beside him, and placed a hand on his head.

“No, I’m not hurt,” Link reassured, and Ty switched to clinging to his leg instead, still staring at Wild. His orange scales shone brightly in the sunshine, like the last rays of light before the sun set.

“Wh... who is...?” Wild choked out, and Mipha gave him a look that was as conflicted as he felt.

“This is our son. Tyde,” she explained gently, like she knew the words would hurt.

They did, hitting Wild like a laser, and he felt a mixture of longing and wonder and grief so intense he was nearly sick.

Tyde was small, and as he shifted around the other Link’s leg, Wild saw that his left arm was shorter than it should be, the fins the wrong size. He had Wild— Link’s eyes, and his frame was proportioned more like a Hylian, but he had golden-orange and white scales all along his body, and had the Zora tail on the back of his head.

All in all, he was exactly what Wild would expect a child of his and Mipha’s to look like.

A tear fell down Wild’s cheek without his permission, and he sank back down to his knees, overwhelmed. He was married here. He had a child here.

This was what would have happened if he hadn’t failed?

This was how much Mipha had loved him?

Wild began to shake, and barely even noticed as Mipha approached and knelt beside him, so lost was he in his own mind.

“You’re from the world the older Sidon came from, aren’t you,” Mipha said quietly, and Wild shakily raised his head to look at her. “I... doubt he remembered in order to tell you. Zelda theorized they all wouldn’t recall anything from their time here.”

Wild gave a small shake of his head, and Mipha sighed.

“It’s complicated I’m afraid, but we’ve dealt with time travel before,” she explained. “And me and Sidon, we... we talked a little, about things. He said that in his time the champions were slain, and that you nearly were along with us. But you were placed in a sleep for one hundred years in order to heal, and then you saved the princess.”

Wild nodded mutely, and Mipha’s face turned further grieved. She carefully reached forward, and Link couldn’t help his flinch as her cool palm rested on his cheek, right over his scars.

The other Link behind Mipha had gone white, his sword finally lowered. Tyde tugged at his pant leg, and Link wordlessly picked him up, holding him tightly to his chest as he locked gazes with Wild.

Wild could only imagine what was going through his head.

Mipha wiped the tear off Wild’s cheek then withdrew her hand, giving him the same smile that he barely remembered from a hundred years ago. It almost made Wild fully break down, but he choked back his tears. He didn’t want her to feel like she had to comfort him.

“I’ll h-have to hear about this adventure Sidon had,” he said, managing not to make his voice sound too watery. “Sounds like it w-was something.”

“It was,” Mipha said quietly. “He always spoke so highly of you.”

She looked like she wanted to say more, but Wild’s double spoke up then, Tyde still nestled up to his chest.

“In your world, we... lost?” he asked in a quiet voice, and Wild swallowed thickly.

“We... did. I failed,” he whispered, not looking at Mipha. “The champions... our weapons turned against us. Overwhelmed us. I only survived because of a Sheikah invention that took a hundred years to work so I could fix my failure. So many died...”

He took in a shuddering breath, and looked at Mipha and his double again, their child still watching him intently.

“But you won here. You did it, you won—”

Wild’s voice choked off, and he barely noticed Tyde tug on his father’s sleeve, trying to get his attention. He did notice when Tyde pointed at Wild though, his brow scrunched up.

“Hurt,” he said with another tug, and for some reason that one small word made Wild lose the rest of his composure.

Suddenly it was too much, the sight of himself holding his and Mipha’s child, Mipha herself sitting beside him, her hand on her husband’s arm. It was a family Wild never had, never would have, and the fact that there was a timeline somewhere where Wild hadn’t failed them, where they had the opportunity to exist, it was just—

A small sob escaped him, and he pulled back, his shaking starting up again. Before he could bolt though, Tyde suddenly squirmed out of his father’s arms and padded over to Wild. Wild froze as he put a tiny hand on his arm, and when Wild looked down at him, he ran his hand up and down for a moment before nodding.

“Better,” he declared, then scampered back to Wild’s double.

Wild could only stare, tears dripping down his cheeks as Tyde climbed back into his father’s arms.

“He’s seen me heal before, he thinks he can too,” Mipha explained with a faint smile. “He does that whenever anyone cries, he thinks they’re hurt.”

A thick laugh burst from Wild’s throat, and he smiled shakily through the tears only running faster down his face. Tyde kept watching him, and Link swallowed back the gigantic lump in his throat in order to speak.

“Thanks,” he managed through his tears, and Tyde gave him a shy smile before hiding his face in Link’s chest.

Wild breathed out shakily, shuddering with a sob he tried not to let escape, and Mipha and his double stayed quiet as they let him cry, Tyde quietly watching them all. Mipha put her hand on his arm at one point, and Wild only cried harder, wishing he could remember her more, wishing she hadn’t died, wishing he didn’t even know what.

He merely cried, and Mipha let him, a different version of himself watching in pale-faced silence.

That was where Wolfie found them barely a quarter hour later, Wild’s eyes red as he quietly explained more about the infected monsters, Mipha and his double asking worried questions about what was going on, Tyde resting against his knee.

And nine Links became ten.

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