#they deserve nothing but kindness and love

[fev3rish]

GOOD LUCK KISSES. kenji tots w/ v

kenji’s body accepts you.

notes. i got a little bit carried away so we have this now. i want kenji so bad man it’s not even funny, no warnings just pure love also i am CRAZY for this man i want him SO BAD. this is also kind of shitty.

thinking about giving kenji sato the lovin’ he deserves.

“babe…” kenji muttered, trying to fight back against your touch. he had so much work to do. he had to train for his next game; it was his biggest one yet! he couldn’t afford—“rest.”

your voice pierced through his own thoughts. soft, sweet, an arrow right through his heart. against his better judgement, kenji let himself scooch into the bed with you. he laid between your legs, the back of his head against your chest as you ran your hands down his hair, all the way to his shoulders. you pressed into the skin and kneaded through the kinks in his shoulder; essentially, giving him a massage.

the sounds he let out in response are almost embarrassingly lewd.

“kenji,” your voice called to him again, and he looked up at you—those big, sparkly eyes of his pleading for you to continue, to loosen him up— “unclench your jaw.” he did.

he didn’t even notice that he did, he just did—his body reacted to you asking him like it was nothing. “it’s okay ken, you’re okay. i’ll take care of you tonight.” you spoke, leaning in and he instinctively tilted his head, only for you to kiss his forehead, which left him a bit needy. “you work too hard.” you state, “i barely work enough.” he replies, and you frown. you flick near the bridge of his nose, and he laughs lightly. “you need to rest.” you say, leaving no room for argument. he doesn’t want to argue in the first place, he’s perfectly content laying on you right now.

—then you place your hands on his chest, down his stomach and to his thighs. he sucks in a breath as you whisper, “you’re so pretty, ken.” and you play with his fingers, and kiss every callous, and he wants to stop you—but he doesn’t even want you to. he wants to tell you he’s not one for sappy shit like this but he is. and you look so pretty telling him how pretty he is, so he lets you.

he lets you comb through his hair until it’s silky smooth, lets you caress his face, he lets you tell him that he’s “beautiful.” and the worst part is that he smiles when you do. he lets you love him.

— “kenjiii…”

your voice drags his name out, and he perks up, waiting for what you have to say. Instead, you take his hands—they’re calloused, and rough, but they’re pretty. he’s confused, but then you press your lips to his knuckles and you place kisses on each one.

his eyes bulge out of his own head, butterflies swarming in his belly wildly—his mouth hangs open as you move on to his other hand. you hold his other one, still, and you press it to your cheek. when you finish giving him kisses, you place a kiss to his temple… and then one final kiss to his lips. his mouth goes dry as he looks at you. you only shrug. “for next week. one of your bigger games, right? it’s to give you good luck.”

good luck? kenji thinks, staring at his hands.

good luck?

“your kisses? goodluck?” kenji thinks out loud, “baby, you just fucking baptized me.” he feels like a new man with every kiss you plant on him, and it’s hard not to want more when you just look like that. but these kisses? these kisses on his knuckles? he feels cleansed.

the next week, when he wins the game, he points at you.

[natalievoncatte]

Lena was waking up, and not in her own bed. She was somewhere warm, swaddled in a heavy blanket. Her head was pounding and she didn’t want to open her eyes. A soft mewling sound tumbled from her lips, and she made as if to blink. Her eyes felt gummy and stuck shut.

“Shhhh,” a small, soft voice murmured. “I’ve got you. You’re okay.”

“Wuh?”

“Just rest,” Kara said.

It was easy to rest. He head fell against the wall of muscle that was Kara’s chest and pillowed on her breast and Lena let out a soft sigh, shifting a bit as she came around and grew more wakeful. She was sitting in Kara’s lap as Kara leaned back against a wall, and Kara had unclasped her cape and wrapped it around her in an impenetrable blanket.

As Lena opened her eyes, she saw that Kara was carding her fingers through Lena’s hair, so gently she barely felt it.

“Your hair is really pretty.”

“Thanks,” said Lena.

A kind of confusion swept through her. Weren’t they fighting? Lena was mad. She was furious. She was world-endingly, life-burn-downingly mad at the woman in whose lap she currently sat. Kara had lied to her about the fundamental nature of who she was and… and…

Lena didn’t feel mad.

“They gave you some pretty heavy drugs when they kidnapped you.”

“Kidnapped me?”

Kara let out a little snort. “You probably don’t remember. These were the lamest kidnappers, Lena. They nabbed you and immediately called me out. I found you and bagged them before you even came around from the drugs.”

“Thanks.”

“You probably won’t remember any of this later,” Kara sighed. “I just want to tell you I’m sorry again. I’m sorry I lied. It was wrong and you deserved better. I should have given you my trust the way you gave it to me.”

Lena blinked a few times but said nothing.

“I’ll never stop saving you. I will always protect you. Even if you never forgive me.”

Lena shifted slightly, pressing a little into Kara, who was now lightly teasing the tips of her fingers across Lena’s scalp, sending light tingles through her sleepy body. Kara yawned and shrugged.

“You okay? You warm enough?”

Lena nodded.

“Alex is coming with a team, she’ll make sure you’re all right. Go back to sleep, baby.”

Baby. That word sent a shockwave through her.

Lena’s eyes drifted shut. She was very tired and it made sense to sleep, to just let it all go. She was safe in Kara’s arms.

As she tumbled towards the dark, she felt the soft press of warm lips to her forehead.

“There’s still so much I want to tell you.”

Lena sighed and nuzzled into Kara’s shoulder. She was soft and warm and smelled heavenly, not just her lavender perfume but the soft smell of her. Lena never told Kara that she wanted to smell her armpits after spin class.

“You want to smell my armpits?!” Kara choked out.

Oh. That was supposed to be inside voice.

“Mmmhmm,” said Lena.

“Can I tell you something, since you probably won’t remember this later?”

“Sure.”

“I’m in love with you.”

Lena started, jolting a little more awake.

“No, shhh,” Kara said, pulling her into a tighter hug. “I know it doesn’t change anything. You don’t owe me anything. I’m just scared. I need you to know of something happens, if…” her breath caught. “If not fast enough.”

“Kara,” said Lena.

“Shh,” Kara murmured, touching a soft kiss to her forehead again that sent a jolt rippling through her.

“I don’t even know if you like girls. It’s just that was the real reason why I was so shitty and hid who I was. I was scared you’d leave if I told you and… and it happened anyway. I’m so sorry.”

Kara sighed.

“Sometimes I wish I could be human so there’d be no secret. I don’t know of Human Kara would have been brave enough to say anything to you but I’m a coward. It would be so easy if there was no lie.”

Lena opened her eyes and looked up. Hot tears glittered on Kara’s cheeks.

“And you know, if you lived with me, and not in that big fancy penthouse, nobody would kidnap you. I’d keep you safe and get you breakfast and make sure you eat before work and take care of you because you don’t take care of yourself.”

“Mmhm, and what do you get out of this arrangement?”

“Well,” said Kara, “I’d get to kiss the prettiest girl in the world.”

“Is that all?”

Kara’s throat bobbed as she swallowed. “Well. I could do more than kiss. I never have with another woman so I’m not sure how… but I want to…”

She brushed bright scarlet.

“I could teach you,” Lena whispered.

“Don’t do that,” said Kara. “Don’t dangle that in front of me, if there’s no chance.”

“Kara,” Lena murmured, her drugged brain grinding its gears a little, “you don’t fill someone’s office with flowers as a friendly gesture. One does not buy an entire billion dollar media empire to hang out with one person as a platonic exercise.”

“Oh,” said Kara.

“I thought you were straight,” said Lena. “It boggles my mind that you thought I was. Me? Really? Have you seen me?”

“Yes,” Kara was looking at her intently now. “I have seen you since the first day. When I saw you for the first time I felt something I’ve never felt before or since.”

“This fight we’re having,” said Lena. “It doesn’t really feel important right now.”

“I know, but you’re on drugs.”

“Will you kiss me?”

“No.”

Kara’s lips were trembling. She dipped slightly as if she’d changed her mind, then pulled back and pursed her lips, pressing her eyes tightly closed.

“You might not feel this way later. It would be wrong.”

Alex chose that exact moment to kick the door in, sending a shower of splinters across the room. Kara pivoted in anticipation, shielding Lena but twisting around so they were even closer, Kara’s stunning blue eyes filling Lena’s vision.

“If you still feel this way later, call me.”

From then it became a blur. Kara placed Lena gently on a stretcher and reclaimed her cap, then trudged a safe distance away and flew off.

Alex was curt and short with her as usual, fussing over unnecessary risks and complaining sharply that Lena got into too much trouble, before sharply cutting off the conversation when it got too friendly and storming off.

Lena ended up back in her penthouse by six, all in all a fairly convenient kidnapping and rescue. She trundled inside and sat down on the couch, staring straight ahead for a while before she went to pour a glass of scotch, then thought better of it.

The night was chilly. National City never really got cold, but on a January night it could be brisk. Lena leaned on her railing and stared out at the bright lights of the city, the flow of traffic beneath and the distant sounds of life and joy.

Suddenly she felt very cold.

“Kara,” she sighed.

In an instant she was there, appearing in a faint gust. Her cape billowed out majestically behind her, hair aloft on the wind currents like clouds of spun gold. Kara didn’t look like an angel; angels looked like Kara.

“Come inside.”

Lena turned and walked back into the warmer confines, hearing the gentle thud of Kara’s boots on the balcony and her soft footsteps walking over.

“Haven’t been here in a while.”

“I used to dream of you moving in with me,” Lena admitted.

Kara stood silently behind her, shifting on her feet.

“I used to think about pampering you every time you mentioned that your rent was high or joked about a reporter’s salary. I wanted to take care of you, treat you, give you fine things.”

“You don’t have to give me anything.”

Lena turned around and crossed the distance between them. With Lena barefoot and Kara in heels, she towered over her. Lena stepped aggressively into her space and Kara didn’t flinch as Lena curled her fingers in the collar of her suit and pulled her down.

She didn’t hesitate. She gently bracketed Lena’s hips in her hands and pulled her in, bending over her to bring their lips together, Kara’s every move soft and gentle, the utmost care in every tiny gesture.

Kara was a good kisser. Lena let it deepen, feeling the heat flush in her chest and elsewhere, as Kara swept her cape around the both of them in a grand, silly, absurdly romantic gesture that made Lena’s knees go all wobbly and her belly flare with warmth.

“I could give you another chance,” Lena whispered into Kara’s lips.

“I’d like that.”

“Want to fly me home?”

“You are home,” said Kara, sounding a little confused.

Lena looked around the apartment, then rested her head on Kara’s chest. “No, I’m not.”

“Oh,” said Lena.

“Take me back to your loft. We can kiss and do the other things and then you can go get me breakfast.”

Kara slid her arm under Lena’s legs and back and picked her up, tucking Lena gently against her chest, stepped up onto the balcony railing and then off, into space. Lena’s breath caught and she tensed as she always did. She really didn’t like heights.

“I won’t drop you.”

Flying back through Kara’s window was a little awkward with the two of them, but they managed. Inside, Kara deposited her on the couch and the fussing began.

First, she made Lena put on a hoodie at the first sign of a shiver. It was old and threadbare and smelled like Kara, and when she wasn’t looking Lena buried her face in the sleeve and breathed it in.

Kara placed an order at a local restaurant and rather than wait for delivery, zipped out and got it herself.

“Do the people at the potsticker place not freak out when Supergirl pops in?”

“Actually, they give me a discount.”

She put the food in front of Lena and disappeared briefly, emerging in a tank top and running shorts, and Lena almost dropped the potsticker she was about to bite into.

Kara sat down beside her, and Lena stared at her. She wasn’t wearing her glasses and her hair was in a loose ponytail, leaving her in a kind of halfway state between Kara and Supergirl. Despite the display of her blocky shoulders and the ribbed fabric tight on her bunching abs, she looked so warm and soft.

Kara speared the potsticker and popped it into her own mouth.

“Hey!” Lena chirped.

“You were just staring at it.”

“Kara!”

“Fine, here.”

Kara gently took another dumpling in her chopsticks and offered it. Lena looked at her askance, then leaned forward and took it in her mouth, eyes never leaving Kara.

Slowly, they shifted together until they were side by side on the sofa, Lena sort of falling onto Kara as she sank into the cushions. They were less eating and more feeding each other, which turned into Lena feeding Kara as they watched whatever came on the TV.

Kara slowly worked an arm around Lena’s waist and Lena turned, throwing her legs across Kara’s thighs.

“I’m tired,” said Lena.

“You’ve had a long day.”

“Want to go to bed?” Lena said. She tried to put her best husk into her voice but it cracked a little and betrayed her.

Kara said nothing. She smiled and lifted Lena up with ease and carried her to the bed.

Lena shimmied out of her leggings, letting them fall around her ankles, all while covered by the oversized hoodie, and her heart was pounding as Kara lifted the covers with an exaggerated gesture and beckoned her into the bed. Lena climbed aboard.

Kara crawled in after her and embraced her like she was trying to pull Lena inside her body.

“You must be tired,” Kara murmured. “It’s okay if you just want to sleep.”

“I am,” Lena whispered back.

Kara started to pull back, but Lena held on. “Can you hold me for a while.”

“Nothing is gonna get you.”

Lena closed her eyes and curled up against her, sighing.

Two weeks later, she put the penthouse on the market.

[azzibuckets]

the not so pleasant part of falling in love [pazzi]

paige bueckers x azzi fudd

summary: it’s late at night and paige starts to spiral

a/n: ignore the fact that i haven’t finished part 2 of anything yet 😩

word count: 840

masterlist

Everyone talks about the pleasant parts of falling in love. The butterflies, the intimacy, the attachment. But no one ever bothered to tell Paige about the grappling fear that comes with it, the loss of power felt when someone has taken utter control over your heart. Paige thinks it’s beautiful in a way - loving someone so much that you trust them with the ability to ruin your life. But then her mind starts to wander, and her chest feels heavy with what-ifs. What if Azzi stops loving her back? What if Azzi eventually leaves her to find someone better? Because Azzi deserves everything in the whole fucking world, Paige thinks, and sometimes I feel like I’m nothing.

So Paige hates herself. She hates herself for being in love with Azzi’s innocent doe eyes and how expressive they are, always betraying her emotions.

Paige hates herself for loving Azzi’s smile. Because if Paige will do one thing, it’ll be make a fool out of herself just for a chance to see Azzi’s dimples. When they’re alone, she’ll make the stupidest jokes to keep Azzi laughing, so that she can reach out and cup her face and run her thumb over those damn dimples and kiss them over and over again. But most of all, Paige loves the way that Azzi has a soft smile reserved solely for her, where her eyes and nose will scrunch up and Paige’s heart will start careening out of control.

Paige hates herself for being utterly obsessed with touching Azzi. Their teammates roll their eyes whenever they show PDA, but it’s not Paige’s fault that she can’t help but slip her hands around Azzi’s waist whenever she’s behind her, burying her nose into Azzi’s neck in order to inhale her scent. She can’t help that she finds the baby hairs at the nape of Azzi’s neck so fucking adorable, running her fingers through it whenever they kiss. She can’t help the fact that in order to fall asleep in the car, some part of her has to be touching Azzi, whether it’s holding Azzi’s hand as she drives, or laying her head in her lap when they’re in the back seat. But wait, you can’t mention sleep, because Paige could start a whole tangent about how she loves napping with Azzi because then she gets to wake up to Azzi’s face, which is a glorious thing that no one else is able to experience. Paige feels bad for the rest of the world sometimes, that no one has their own Azzi, but then she feels pride, because of all the girls Azzi chose to be her person, it was Paige.

Paige hates herself for how she loves every little bit of Azzi Fudd. She could talk about her girlfriend for hours, about how hard she works and how she hasn’t let her injuries stop her. Or how kind and selfless Azzi is, always a shoulder for the entire team to cry on. Or how Azzi is the best basketball player in the nation world, and she hates that people don’t recognize Azzi for the pure talent and skill she has, but it makes Paige all the more excited for the next season, so that they can dominate the court together and finally prove it to everyone.

Paige hates the way she loves to bicker with Azzi. They could go back and forth, stuck for hours in the most useless and trivial argument, but because both of them are stubborn hard asses, neither of them will give up until Azzi inevitably threatens to make Paige sleep in her own bed that night, and Paige immediately crumbles because she can’t bear the thought of not cuddling Azzi to sleep. “You’re right about everything,” she’ll admit with a pout, letting herself fall into Azzi’s arms and showering kisses all over her face. “I love you. Don’t make me go to sleep in my bed, all cold and alone.” And Azzi will roll her eyes, but affectionately, and then smirk to herself because she knows that she’ll never actually do that to Paige, not for something as simple as a dumb argument. But it’s funny how much Paige believes it, and she also loves seeing Paige be a total simp.

Paige hates all of these things, she concludes as she stares up at the ceiling. But then she looks to the side, and Azzi glances up from her computer, meeting her eyes and giving a little grin before going back to her homework. And in that moment, as Paige studies Azzi’s goddamn gorgeous face lit up by the weak light of her laptop, she realizes that she doesn’t give a flying fuck about how she hates these things. Because Azzi Fudd is completely hers, and Azzi Fudd will never leave.

Paige rolls over and buries her face in Azzi’s shirt. The younger girl is surprised at first, but she laughs and starts stroking Paige’s cheek with the pad of her thumb. “What’s gotten into you?”

“Nothing.” Paige buries her head further. “Just thinkin about how much I love you.”

[ponderingmoonlight]

oooo sanemi request - idea - you're training to be a new haishra and are very very very very nice to everyone, queue tragic af backstory and you believe in kindness IDK ok, cruelty made sure you kept your heart soft, but when you are FIGHTING there is nothing but darkness what happens when that trance doesn't leave you for a while & to snap out of it only sanemi is enough?

It's the tiniest bit different from what you requested, but I hope you like it anyway! Also, thank you so much for your cover suggestions 🤍

Sanemi Shinazugawa pulling you out of your trance with his own methods

Pairing: Sanemi x fem!reader

Word Count: 2k

Synopsis: What a kind and tender soul you are, loved by everyone around you. Until you get into a fight. Until the only person who is able to pull you back to reality is the wind hashira coming to safe you.

Warnings: average sanemi language, fluff fluff fluff, some spelling errors since I wasn't able to finish proofreading

„Me telling him? Are you actually insane? You’re the one Kocho-san sent”

“But you came with me. You go tell him!”

“Ain’t no way!”

“Telling me what?”

Their blood freezes in their veins instantly. Over and over, the wind hashira made it all too clear that they aren’t allowed to let you alone. Never. Not on a mission, not when there’s a high risk of you losing yourself. Because once you’re gone, there’s only one person who’s able to pull you back into reality.

“Well…(y/n)-sama…She…”

They don’t even have to finish this sentence for Sanemi to know exactly what’s going on. Are you okay? Are you facing some strong demons at the moment? His heart overfills with rage and anxiety to the point where he can’t take it anymore.

“Didn’t I tell you fools every single fucking time to look out of her? Useless brats. Show me where she is”, he hisses through gritted teeth.

It takes all his inner strength to not slam them into a tree nearby. Those fucking jerks had one job. That’s why he always insists on coming with you, because what if you lose yourself again with no way out but him? What if he’s too far away to drag you into safety in time?

“Hurry the fuck up!”

“Please don’t worry about me all the time, Sanemi. I can’t stand the thought of you being distressed because of me.”

Yeah, to hell with your angelic voice and your kind eyes. Fuck your gorgeous appearance, your uniform that makes you look like an angel walking on earth. You, a true sweetheart who is loved by everyone without any exceptions. And him, who built a wall around his heart only you were able to overcome.

But when you fight against demons, that tender self of yours vanishes into thin air. The second death and fright surround you, you turn into a serial killer who doesn’t show any mercy. Especially towards demons, but when a human comes into your way…

Sanemi picks up his pace in an instant. He can’t allow something like that to happen, he can’t stand that look of deep sorrow written on your face the second you realized what you’ve done in your trance. He just has to make sure this fight ends on time, that he’s able to pull you back into reality like he always does.

He and only him. Not even Shinobu is able to reach your mind when you lose yourself. In fact, no one but Sanemi is. Why on earth him? Out of all people you could trust this much, you somehow chose him. Oh, he definitely doesn’t deserve any of the feelings you hold for him, he doesn’t deserve you even looking his way. After all, everyone sees nothing but a menace in him with even his little brother fearing him to the core.

“(y/n)…s-sama?”

His blood freezes in an instant. There you stand with your arm buried in the chest of the demon lying to your feet and your eyes gleaming bloody red. How long did you fight already? How long has this been going on without him knowing?

“Get away from here before she rips your heads off”, the bars behind him.

You don’t speak, furious orbs now fixated on Sanemi. In the split of a second you dash towards him, ready to slice his throat open with your bare fingernails. Just in time he manages to get a hold of your wrist and push you into the ground, his whole bodyweight now lying on top of you.

“(y/n)”, he mutters softly.

A violent scream escapes your lips, limbs desperately fighting to get away from him. Oh, how much Sanemi hates to see you in that state. Shinobu was never able to find out why you turned into this when facing danger. Despite your tender and warm personality, despite your remarkable sword skills and technique, you lose control over your own mind and body when the situation around you gets too heated.

None of that matters now. Sanemi grabs your body from behind and pulls you into his lap while placing gentle kisses on your neck.

“It’s fine, (y/n). Just come back to me. Those demon are gone, got it?”

The shell of your body still fights for freedom, still doesn’t accept to be held by him.

“Come back, (y/n). I’m here. Everything’s fine.”

Is that…Sanemi talking to you? Your vision is foggy, eyes roaming around what looks like a dark forest. Your whole body is covered in ice cold sweat, your heart hammers so roughly against your ribcage that you feel like fainting any given minute.

It happened again.

“Sanemi”, you breathe his name into the night while allowing yourself to collapse against his chest.

You lost yourself again. Did you hurt someone? Why were you here? How-

“Don’t worry, you’re alright.”

“And the-“

“No one got hurt”, he reassures you in an instant.

“I…lost again”, you mumble defeated.

You’re able to control every single fiber in your body, can wield a sword so delicately that Ubayishiki-sama even chose you to join the circle of pillars. But still, you lose yourself when facing a heated fight.

“Don’t worry too much, nothing happened and I was home”, Sanemi mutters into your hair.

“Thank you for coming. And…for everything else. I’m sorry for making such a mess over and over. You must-”

“Nah, I don’t wanna hear you putting yourself down again, (y/n). You’re good, okay? I don’t mind looking after you at all, to be honest.”

You don’t know what came over you. Is it the anger, the frustration over your own disability? You can’t help but swing around, arms wrapped around Sanemi’s larger frame while you allow your head to rest against his steady heartbeat.

“It’s just so frustrating. From one second to the other, I lose the power over my own body. If it wasn’t for you, who know what I’d do to innocent people around. I’m a weapon, Sanemi. To even be considered a hashira-“

“Stop talking nonsense”, he interrupts you gently, his hand pulling your chin up to force you to look at him.

“You’re wiping the floor with our asses in training. Most of us hashira can’t stand a chance against you. You are pure and kind, loved by everyone. We don’t give a single shit about that happening from time to time. And like I said, I’m always here to pull you back into reality.”

“You’re my greatest treasure, Sanemi”, you mutter.

Tears immediately shoot in your eyes, take away that gorgeous sight in front of you. Truth is, you love Sanemi Shinazugawa with all your heart. Since he first barked at you, since you sat underneath a tree the whole night and talked about all the things both of you been through, since he put you out of your episode for the first time. Oh, how much you adore that man.

“Don’t talk nonsense, (y/n). I’m worse than everyone else.”

His heart stings violently when nothing but the truth leaves his mouth. He doesn’t deserve your praise, let alone your glossy orbs staring up at him. Fuck, he shouldn’t even put his arms around you like that. Not when you’re an angel while he’s a no one. Not when you could have anybody else, a man who deserves your kind words, to see your lovely figure every morning after waking up.

“I don’t care about others. You’re the one that I love, Sanemi. Because you make me feel good about myself, because you bring me back to reality when I can’t return on my own. You’re rough, you’re suborn and you can be kind of mean-“

“Only because some of these jerks deserve it”, he grumbles.

“But apart from that, you are a kind and loving man. I can’t help but search for you in a crowd of people, I am forced to ask myself every time what you’d do in my place. You’re constantly on my mind. Your words, your skills, your voice. Just…you. I can’t get enough of you.”

“Stop making fun of me…”

Fuck, he can feel his face heating up in an instant. This can’t be true, right? Why would a girl like you fall for someone like him? Maybe you’re still a little dizzy and can’t understand the meaning of your words, maybe-

“I’d never make fun of you.”

And then your lips meet his. So unexpectedly that his widen eyes stare at your soft features in utter disbelief, so innocently that he can’t help but wonder if he’s dreaming. You, kissing him?

“You’re gonna regret this when you’re clear again, (y/n)”, Sanemi mumbles against your lips.

“Look into my eyes. I am clear, Sanemi. In fact, I’ve never been clearer in my entire life. I love you.”

You kiss him. Over and over, your soft lips brush against yours while he can’t help but wrap his arms around you in a desperate attempt to keep you this close. His heart pounds so loud that you’re definitely able to her it, his fingertips get lost in your hair.

“I love you too, (y/n). Fuck, I love you so much”, he finally replies.

“I’m so lucky for having you.”

“You, lucky to have me? Hell, I’m the luckiest guy on earth”, Sanemi grumbles with his hand gently caressing your cheek.

This is real. Not a cruel trick his spooky brain plays on him, not one of the dreams that keep him up all night wanting more. No, your head really rests against his chest, you really have your arms wrapped around his body still, you really kissed him.

“No wonder it took you so long to come back, Shinazugawa. I didn’t know you were busy with (y/n).”

Sanemi’s heart drops to the floor, both of your head darting towards the direction of that painfully familiar voice in an instant.

“What the hell are you doing here?”, he barks at Obanai in distress.

“Everyone was worried about (y/n) so I came to check”, Obanai replies dryly.

“Oh, thank you so much for looking out for me! But don’t worry, I am fine!”

“Yeah, I can see that.”

“GET LOST OR I’LL KILL YOU!”

Tags: @chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix  @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly @beatrexworld

@froufrousnowman @hidazinie @tomiokathedepresso  @poketrainer2270 @chaoticwinnercupcake

@lees-chaotic-brain @wordskeeper @polarbvnny @sugu-love @ryva @baku2345

@komelrebi-san @kentocalls (your fic will be next) @barbuse @sunshine7queen @lavenderdrxp

@yaninnaacu @hopefulbelievertimemachine

[cemetery-slvt]

it makes me upset when i see people talking about how narcissists are bad people and you should avoid them at all costs because theyre going to hurt you or use you or whatever it is. not all narcissists are bad people. the disorder does not automatically make you a bad person or abusive. as a matter of fact, all of the people with npd that i’ve met have been some of the kindest, most supportive people ever.

there is a a lot of misinformation online. for example, the “black eyes” of a narcissist trend on tiktok. i’ve seen lots of posts on reddit or tiktok or what be it about how all narcissists play the victim, manipulate, or gaslight to get their way, how you have to walk on eggshells and we’re abusive, etc etc. the list goes on and on and on.

“narcissistic abuse” isn’t narcissistic abuse — it’s physical abuse, emotional/psychological abuse, etc. i’m not saying this to downplay abuse by any means, because nobody should ever have to go through that, however there are better ways to phrase it. by saying “narcissistic abuse”, you are further stigmatizing and demonizing the disorder. you could instead say, “i was physically abused” or “i was ___” by my [insert relationship dynamic here].

for everyone that has experienced abuse by the hands of someone with this disorder, or even at all, i sincerely apologize and wish you nothing but the best. you never deserved that and i hope that you are able to heal. i’m sending you so much love.

narcs are human too. many of us are really good people. i myself have been diagnosed with npd and yes, for a very long time i was a bitch. i did play the victim, my loved ones did have to walk on eggshells around me, however after a lot of work and a lot of conscious effort, i changed that. it’s very discouraging and upsetting to see misinformation and to see the demonizing of disorders. cluster b people are human too. we deserve the same kindness and respect that everyone else does. being diagnosed with cluster b disorders don’t automatically make us a bad person.

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

I Think I Like This Little Life

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Princess!Reader

Word Count: ~2.6k

Warnings: fluff and angst

Summary: You’re getting too comfortable in the life you’ve built for yourself that you make a terrible mistake, one that might make you leave it sooner than you plan to. Three rules. That’s it. Now, you’ve broken one.

Play Pretend Masterlist

Square Filled: eye color for @mfbingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are greatly appreciated <3

x

Then

The citizens of Yacleira walk around the town’s square either buying food for their families or clothing for their children. Kids run around in laughter without a care as to who they might be bothering. Families roam about and you lean against the balcony railing with a sigh. Oh, how you wish to have what they have. Couples seem so in love with each other, content to live their lives with the love of their life and children.

You wish that could be you but you know that as long as you stay Princess of Yacleira, you can’t ever have that. You’re destined to marry a prince you don’t even love. He’s nice and kind to his people but there is no spark there. You want a love so passionate and consuming that it takes over your entire life. You want someone to love you because they want to, not because they have to. You want to be someone’s first choice. You want to feel a sense of adventure because you don’t get it here.

You’re stuck in this castle all day and night and if you leave, you have to have an array of bodyguards at your side. Grass isn’t always greener on the other side, but you’d rather take the life of a commoner than the life of a Princess. Someone points to you from the town square and waves enthusiastically, and you wave back politely.

“So, this is where you disappeared to.”

You don’t have to turn to know who is behind you.

“I needed to get away. All those people telling me how great I am gets exhausting.” You turn to face Benjamin, your trusted bodyguard. “Mother doesn’t understand.”

“I understand. I can see how this entire thing is stressing you out when it shouldn’t.” He joins your side by the railing and you both look at the town’s square below. “I see how you look at them. You want to be them.”

“Tell me what I should do. I do not want this. I do not love Henry. I care about my country and I want what is best for it but not at the expense of my happiness.”

“I might be able to help with that.”

“How?”

“I have watched over you since you were born. I want nothing more than to help you become as happy as you can be. I can get you out.”

“What do you mean? Out of Yacleira?”

“Yes. I have a trusted friend in the United States, Don Stockwell, who will watch over you. He’ll take care of you and keep you safe so you may live a normal life.”

“What about you? Surely Mother and Father will find out about this. You’ll get hanged for your crimes.”

He steps closer to you and puts a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“Do not worry about me. I cannot stand to see you this way.”

You pull Benjamin into a tight hug.

“I truly do not deserve you.”

“You have three things to remember. No trouble, stay out of the news, and no pictures. You don’t want to ruin things before you can truly start living your life.”

“Okay,” you nod.

Now

Back in Yacleira, you spent a lot of time in the library where you took pride in reading to children every week--children who didn’t have a lot of education to begin with. To see their smiles brought you so much joy and you want to spread that joy to Spencer. He told you his love for books without going into too much detail so you’re at the local library picking out books you think he might enjoy.

“Interested in historical fiction, I see.” You look to your right and see a young man with dark brown hair and baggy clothes. “Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s fine. It’s for my… it’s for someone I know.” You’re not sure what to call Spencer yet. You’ve been on two dates, and you don’t know if that qualifies you two as boyfriend and girlfriend. “Do you like historical fiction?”

“Yeah, I’m more into non-fiction but there are some good fiction books out there.”

“Yeah, I think so.”

“I was sitting over there doing some work when I noticed you over here and I have to say I think you’re really pretty.”

“Thank you. I gotta go but it was nice meeting you.”

You take the books you picked out and leave the stranger’s side. Once you purchase them, you walk to the BAU which is only a few blocks from where the library is. After signing in at the front desk, you take the elevator up to the bullpen. You’re not going to be here for long but you wanted to see the look on Spencer’s face when you give him the books.

“Hey, Y/N, what are you doing here?”

JJ walks to you from the break room.

“I’m here to see Spencer. I know you guys are busy so I won’t stay long. Plus, I have to go to work soon.”

“Head to his desk and I’ll let him know you’re here.”

You walk to his desk and set the books on it while you wait. Spencer doesn’t keep you waiting long and joins your side.

“What are you doing here?” Spencer pauses, having heard what that might have sounded like. “I mean, I’m glad to see you, don’t get me wrong.”

“I wanted to give you some of these books. I hope you like the. You said you wanted to start reading more historical fiction, and I have read all of these. They’re really good.”

“No way, that’s so nice. Thank you.” He picks up two of them and smiles widely. “You shouldn’t have.”

“Well, you took my mini-golfing last week which was so much fun.” You look around and see half his team watching you as if you’re a TV drama. They quickly look away and pretend to be busy and you shake your head with a smile. “I was wondering if you wanted to go out to dinner with me tonight at seven. It’s my turn to take you out.”

“Yeah, I’d like that. Where?”

“It’s a surprise but dress nicely.”

“Okay.”

“Okay, I have to go to work but I’ll see you tonight. Is it possible to have you drive? I still don’t have a car.”

“Yeah.”

“Great,” you blush.

You kiss his cheek but he turns his head so you get his lips instead. The kiss only lasts five seconds but it’s the best five seconds of your day today. You leave the BAU and start to walk back to work. You’re looking at the pictures you took on your phone from your time at the mini-golf course when you crash into another person.

“Shit!”

You look up to see the same man you met at the library. He is carrying a coffee in his hand that goes everywhere, mostly on him.

“I am so sorry,” you gasp. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine but my shirt isn’t,” he chuckles. “It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. I work at a coffee shop. Let me make you a new coffee, completely free.”

“Okay. Thank you. I’m Jacob.”

“Y/N.”

You bring him into your room and have him stay by the counter while you make his coffee order. You’ve been getting good at making coffee which is something you’re proud of. You’ve been learning a lot about not only how to work in this coffee shop but about people who work hard for a living. Sure, you have a whole inheritance to fall back on but you never cared about the money. You’d rather struggle with the rest of them if you had true love.

“Sorry if I seemed like I was in such a rush. I was on my way to my mother’s since she’s sick. I don’t know what I’m going to do because I want to help her but it costs everything I have. I don’t have much to begin with and I have to try and put food on my table for my kids.”

The empathetic side of you completely falls for his sob story. Whether it’s true or not, it’s working for you. Ben has always told you to be cautious in helping people because of who you are. However, no one in the United States knows who you are. They wouldn’t know that you have hundreds of billions on your back. 

You’re safe here. No one is out to get you.

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah. I don’t mean to dump this on you. It’s just hard, you know?”

“Let me help you.”

“I appreciate that, Y/N, but what can you do that I can’t?”

“I have some money. I can give you some.”

You reach into your pocket but he tries to stop you with his words. You take out your wallet regardless of what he says.

“No, I can’t take that from you.”

“Please, it’s the least I can do.” You hand him his coffee and also a few hundred bills from your wallet. “This will help put food on your table.”

“This is so kind of you. I don’t know what to say.”

“Don’t say anything. Again, it’s the least I can do. Plus, I love helping people.”

“Thank you.”

Jacob leaves shortly after and you finish your shift with no other distractions. Spencer is scheduled to come pick you up at seven and you get off work at six. You rush home so you have as much time as you can to get ready. You immediately head to your room and pick out one of your princess dresses you managed to smuggle into the US. It’s a floor-length golden dress with sparkles all over it. The sleeves are two thin spaghetti straps that cross over in the back, and it has a deep V in the front that shows off your cleavege elegantly. There are frills coming off the side of it starting from your waist but there are only a few slabs of fabric so it’s not overwhelming. It’s elegant for dinner and it’s a piece of your old life that Spencer won’t know any better about. You’re curling parts of your hair when Don walks into your room.

“You gave someone money?”

“How did you know about that?”

“It’s my job to know everything you do.”

“I didn’t think it was a big deal. I spilled his coffee, and his mother is sick. He’s having trouble putting food on the table for his family.”

“Do you know how dangerous it is to be giving money to people you don’t know? Someone could find out who you are and then this will all be for nothing.”

You finish curling your hair and set the curler down with a sigh.

“I’m sorry.”

“Sorry might be good enough next time. Now, I have to make sure you didn’t ruin anything.”

You’ve never seen Don act this angry before. Granted, you’ve only been with Don for a few months but he’s always been calm and collected. Seeing him angry like this is jarring.

“Don, I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, me too.”

Don leaves the house and you finish getting ready. You go to the secret stash of money that Don has that you’re almost certain he knows you know about. Still, you take a few hundred dollars for dinner. You don’t want to come up short and embarrass yourself. Spencer shows up right on the dot wearing a nice suit, looking as handsome as ever. He smiles when he sees you, and he takes your hand when you reach the bottom step.

“You look stunning,” he smiles.

“Thank you. You look very handsome.”

You tell him where to go and direct him to one of the high-end restaurants in the area, the Sky Dome. There is a huge sky dome in the middle of the restaurant that opens at night so you can look at the night sky while enjoying dinner. This place is on the fancier side of things, and it’s something you’re familiar with. It reminds you of home and you’re kind of feeling homesick.

You miss your parents and Benjamin but you know you can’t go home now.

After the hostess check your reservation, she takes you to the table underneath the dome that’s already open.

“Wow, this place is very fancy. I would never have pegged you to be this way.”

“Like what?”

“So fancy. You work at a coffee shop.”

“Is that a problem?”

“No,” he shakes his head.

“I wanted to do something nice for you.”

“I appreciate it. I’ve never been here before.” You want to be happy about being here with Spencer but you can’t get Don’s words out of your head. Now, I have to make sure you didn’t ruin anything. What did he mean by that? You’ve been very careful not to reveal anything to Spencer or anyone else you know. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I just… I had a fight with my uncle. He’s a very private person and he found out I helped someone today.”

“What do you mean?”

“After giving you the books, I was on my way to work and I ran into someone causing their coffee to spill everywhere. I gave them a free one and he told me about how his mother was sick and how he was struggling to put food on the table. I gave him a few hundred dollars to help out. When my uncle found out, he was pissed. He just worries about me. I’m always too kind and he's worried that will get me in trouble one day.”

“I think being nice is the best thing someone can be. I wouldn’t let what he says determine that.”

“I won’t,” you grin. There aren’t clouds to obscure the moonlight so the light shines through the large window and down onto the patrons below. Spencer looks at you above his menu, his brown eyes shining. “You have such pretty eyes. I’m a sucker for brown eyes.”

Spencer blushes but doesn’t say anything about it.

The waitress comes over to grab your drink orders and while you’re looking over the wine list, the front doors open. Immediate loud chatter come from outside as a couple walk in. Flashes come from cameras so that makes you think that someone important walked in.

“What’s going on?” you ask.

“Oh, Angelina Jolie and Leonardo DiCaprio are doing a movie here. They told us they were coming.”

“Oh.”

After you put in your orders, you keep looking at the sea of paparazzi waiting outside. No trouble, stay out of the news, and no pictures. No pictures. If you end up on the front page of a magazine, your parents will for sure find you. You’ll be taken back to Yacleira and live out the rest of your life as a numb wife next to an equally numb King.

You try not to let this sour your good mood throughout the dinner. Maybe they might be gone before you and Spencer get done. When you do get done, the paparazzi is still there but it looks like Angelina and Leo are leaving at the same time. If you hang back, maybe you might stall enough to not catch the cameras.

“Come on,” Spencer says.

He guides you along with him just as the two celebrities are leaving. You can’t tell him no because then that will raise suspicions and he’d ask questions you can’t answer. You just have to keep your head down and hope your face isn’t caught by the cameras. The cameras go off even before the two celebrities get to the door, and you try and hide behind Spencer. He sees you’re uncomfortable by the amount of cameras so he does his best to keep you hidden. He gets to the car as fast as possible but you know the damage is already done.

You just hope this isn’t what makes you found out. You’re starting to like it here and you’d hate to leave it so soon.

x

Want to be tagged? Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[class1akids]

BNHA 426 - First thoughts

I have mixed feelings:

My No 1 wish was Toya being able to talk, so I'm glad we got that. Though super-sad about the "slowly dying" thing. But he's not dead yet - so I'll consider that "open ending" for now.

Way too much focus again on Enji feeling bad - I'm glad Toya called him out for doing everything only when it's too late / doesn't matter anymore

I’m also glad that Touya reached his goal - he destroyed Endeavor, the hero fully. His body, his reputation, his legacy. Everything Touya was created for, he burnt to ash. (But at what price 😭)

it's also super-hollow to say he's sheltering the family from the fallout, after they've just talked about how Fuyumi lost her job (and got a new one through the connections she herself built). How is he going to do that?

What a contrast between Bakugou and Deku getting thanks from All Might and being called greatest heroes - while not a single person in this family thanks Shoto for the extraordinary efforts he made for them (not only in this war, but since his first visit to Rei) -> they never deserved my boy tbh...

The Shoto - Toya scene was easily the highlight of the chapter for me. I really wanted this for both of them. Everyone in the family is talking about how they will talk, but Shoto is the one actually asking a question to Toya; he still wants to know his brother after everything.

And I love how that's the final breakthrough for Toya -words supported by actions - to start crying and to say sorry. I think his inability to cry was one of the big reasons he could never move on, so I hope in whatever time he has left, he can get the emotional closure he needs. And I'm glad Shoto got at least one person in the family acknowledge his efforts, even if with just a "sorry".

It makes me super-sad though because you can see that Toya and Shoto's relationship had so much potential!!! They would have been the best of brothers.

Natsuo cutting off Endeavor is fine for me. I didn't expect a big group hug - all the kids are grown up with their own lives - like Toya said "why not sooner". Them becoming a big happy family was never on the cards. Though I'm more disappointed Natsuo had nothing to say to Toya. He's a lot like his father.

Is Rei sticking with Endeavor? I hope she's just escorting him to the agency car and not like moving back to the house with him.

I'm super disappointed that Shoto got no hug from his mom or even a line of direct dialogue. In 426 chapters, they never spoke directly!!!!! - Shoto is the only kid in the family Rei never had a dialogue with as a grown up. Hori really fumbled her too.

So Shoto - just like Izuku to Bakugou - never gets to respond properly to Endeavor's apology. Still, I interpret his line to Enji and Rei that even if the family doesn't get a dream ending, he's going to be ok because he has friends who support him and he's strong enough to shape his own identity. I'm glad we didn't get like a "it's water under the bridge" or an even worse "I'll restore the family's honor" kind of plot for Shoto. He did everything he could, he did the heavy lifting for every single relationship - he's more than earned his freedom (though I doubt that the public will easily forget that he's "Endeavor's son and Dabi's brother").

It's really bittersweet, but Shoto is still better off compared to where he started - he built some kind of relationship (however distant) with every person in his family and I guess he'll stay in touch without feeling like he has to carry all of them.

And more importantly has a safety net of friends, and he got out from under his father's thumb, away from the toxicity of his birth, forged a positive self-image, has clear goals, etc. He's an amazingly strong person, with a great mental fortitude and I hope in the 4 remaining chapters we'll see him smile at least once. He deserves it.

I'm glad Kiddo and Onima are alive. I would have hated it if they died from the copied Phosphor. I guess Burnin' is running the agency now? Though probably it gets closed down after Endeavor's retirement.

Hawks being the new prez of the HPSC was expected. Let's see what he can do.

Nagant "I want to stay in prison" is super-weird, but whatever. Hers always felt like a half-baked plot.

Gentle/La Brava is the first canon ship confirmed. I don't like them, but good for them I guess.

So next up: Spinner - Deku talk?

I need some processing time and some translations and the missing pages, but it's not the best or the worst. It delivered the thing I wanted most, though less talking from Enji and more talking from Touya and Shouto would have been better.

[beausprouts]

PLEASEEEE GIVE US THE LORE TIMELINE FOR UR AU

WELL I MEAN IF YOU INSIST-

I made this timeline JUST FOR THIS MOMENT. More rambling under the cut if anyone is curious 👍

So essentially I changed everything because I can. I've been in the fandom since like the first game came out and I was a baby so it's my right to mold the lore to what I want thank you very much.

I essentially just condensed it. So FNAF 3 and the events of the Steel Wool era are combined. It makes sense to me that a company like the one that owns the Pizzaplex would use a literal real life murder spree to make a haunted house. Did you guys see the Scraptrap arcade cabinet? Yeah. Exactly.

I took inspiration from the movie with how Will was able to have a weird psychic connection to the kids, and controlled them in a way to how Henry's relationship with the missing children is in this continuity. He was essentially able to convince them it was Will that killed them. Only Charlie knows the truth, because she hasn't revealed herself to her father and pretty much saw everything happen (yikes). I like to think that Charlie and Will kind of team up similarly to how Henry and Mike team up in canon? A perfect mirror flip.

I'm toying big time with some twists, I do like the mimic as a villain but I haven't decided yet if I'm going to use him for this plotline. Maybe! Who knows maybe Henry never made it to his 70s and the current CEO was the mimic all along ooh spoookyyy.

My OC Beau essentially replaces Vanny as the partner in crime to Springtrap. Though this time the goal is to clear his name and to free the souls of the children. Vanessa is still around but nothing bad ever happens to her because she doesn't deserve it and I love her.

I want Michael to get out of the Sister Location spot under the Pizzaplex and become a minor antagonist too because him, Evan, and Elizabeth all also blame William for what happened, what reason would they have to believe otherwise its fair.

So yeah y'know, drawing my stupid oc being silly with Springs ended up getting its own lore bible my bad. Autism moment.

[esmerulia-chantelle]

Insecure

Azul Ashengrotto x GN!Reader

Summary: You fell in love with Azul and wanted to confess your feelings but your negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity make you think otherwise. And what about Azul? What does he truly think and feel about you?

Notes: Angst with comfort. Mentions of being insecure; of not being deserving of someone else. If this makes you uncomfortable, please do not read.

A/N: Kind of self-indulgent and was just feeling the angst when I originally thought and wrote this. 😭😭 But we have comfort because my heart can't bear it if it's only angst. And some fluff too. 🥹🥹

A repost from my old blog @escha-evenstar. Edited.

You liked to think you were just an average person. You didn't consider yourself smart, but at least you got good grades in school despite coming from another world. You didn't consider yourself popular, but you were at least well-liked by the students and have made friends with a lot of people. You didn't consider yourself beautiful. Just average. Boring. Lame. That was you. Nothing about you stood out.

But then you meet this guy named Azul Ashengrotto and he stood above the rest. He was your everything.

Sure, things started off... not so friendly. But after his Overblot, you started becoming closer with each other.

Azul seemed the same, except he kept making exceptions for you.

"Tutoring for alchemy? Well, that comes with a price, you know?" He said with a smirk. "But as a token of our... friendly relationship, I'll teach you for free. ...as long as you don't disclose this to anyone."

Except, he didn't mind being physically close to you.

"W-what are you doing?!" He exclaimed with a blush on his face. "...you're hugging me as a thank you? It's not necessary. .......I didn't say I didn't like it. Just... at least tell me next time?"

Except, he was more relaxed and open with you.

"I'm fine, Y/N. But I really need to sort out and finish this paperwork by tonight." Azul let out a sigh. "...okay. I relent. I'll take a break. 10 minutes. ...you prepared some tea? You're really something, aren't you?" He chuckled. "How shall I repay you for your kindness? ...you want another story? Well, there's this coin I found when I was younger......"

You didn't notice these subtle changes in Azul and just continued to interact with him as you usually did.

Each day, your affections for the octomer grew more and more until you realized you had now fallen in love with him. And it was the moments like these that you held closely to your heart.

Oh, how he makes your heart flutter.

You love how smart and clever he is. You love how hardworking he is and how he always gives his best effort to every single thing. You love how smooth and confident he is. You love how he could be shy and get flustered too from time to time. You love his mischievous smirks and small but genuine smiles. You love his merform and human form. You love a lot of things about Azul. In fact, you love everything about him.

How you wished to tell him of your true feelings.

But you didn't.

You valued what you have with Azul. Yes, you actually wanted more. You wanted to establish a romantic relationship with him.

But what were the chances he felt the same towards you?

You were a blur— a smudge, compared to everyone else. You were nothing. Yet he was everything.

Sometimes, you try to think positive about yourself.

Maybe I could actually be special enough for him?

You tried to think long and hard about the good qualities you have. And after a nice heart-to-heart talk with your friends together with some encouragement, you decided to confess.

Or at least you planned to.

But then you saw Azul talking with someone else.

Wow. They look pretty/handsome.

They seem to be having fun.

They look happy together.

......

Am I pretty/handsome?

Am I fun to be around with?

...would you be happy Azul if you were with someone like me?

......

The negative thoughts kept circling around your head. Suddenly, your cheeks felt wet.

You were crying.

It hurt. It hurt so much.

Because after all, how could someone like you be with someone like him?

Azul noticed you walking by and immediately excused himself from the person he was talking to. He followed after your steps in a brisk pace and called out to you.

"Y/N!"

But you didn't look back. Instead, you seemed to walk even faster. And Azul found it strange. He jogged up to you and caught your wrist with his hand.

"Y/N! I was calling for you and—"

Your eyes met his and Azul's heart clenched in pain from the sight of your weeping face.

"What happened? Who did this? I'll make sure they pay for what they did to you!"

You pretended it was nothing and laughed it off. "Hehe. It's nothing Azul. Don't worry about it," you said as you wiped away the heavy tears. "I really need to get going though. I'll see you around!"

You turned your heel to leave but his hand never left your wrist. Your peculiar behavior only served to tighten his grip on you.

"What's wrong?" His voice came out soft and sweet as he asked you.

"Nothing's wrong."

"Then why are you crying?"

"I'm not." You sniffled, trying to hold back your sobs as you kept your gaze away from him.

"Would you at least look at me?"

You didn't answer his question. "I really have to go, Azul."

You pulled at your hand, trying to escape from his strong grip but he wouldn't budge. "Azul, please..."

"You know you can tell me anything, right?"

"I know."

"So tell me."

"I can't."

"Why?"

"Because."

"Because what?"

"Just because, Azul! So please. Please! Just let me go."

Your voice cracked as heavy tears cascaded down your cheeks like a waterfall. Your knees gave in and you collapsed to the floor.

"Y/N!"

He kneeled on the floor beside you and held you close in his arms. You struggled to get out of his embrace but each attempt caused Azul to hug you tighter even more.

"Y/N, I don't know what's caused you to be like this so please tell me what's wrong so I can help you."

Why...?

Why won't you tell me?

Upon hearing no answer from you, Azul sighed. "Alright. I won't press the issue for now, but how about we go back to the Lounge? I'll brew you a nice drink and bring you some snacks. How does that sound?" He gave you a small smile to be more comforting.

Why are you so sweet like this?

Did I do something wrong?

"Y/N?"

Please stop. You're making it harder to let go...

Please tell me. Don't push me away...

"Please...?" Azul felt his voice wavering as he pleaded with you.

After a few seconds of sniffling, you spoke. You said it so quietly his ears almost didn't pick it up.

"....I don't deserve you," you mumbled.

"What?" Azul felt confused. He pulled backwards a bit to look at your face. "What are you talking about?"

His eyes met yours and he reached out his fingers to wipe away the tears. It pained him to see you like that.

"Why are you being like this?" You said.

"Like what?" He asked.

"Why do you treat me like this?"

"Is there.. something wrong with it?"

You gave him a weak laugh. "Hehe. Nothing's wrong." You stopped crying and chose to stare back at his blue eyes.

I want to tell you something.

"You're.. really sweet, Azul." A tiny smile made its way on your face.

You were smiling at him, but Azul felt there was still some sadness on the inside.

"I'm glad you think so, but—"

"And you're so kind. And smart. And handsome. And—"

You continued to sing your praises and Azul was stunned from each compliment that came out of your lips. The tips of his ears turned red and his cheeks were warm.

Why are you telling me this?

Your hands slowly made their way up to cup his face.

It's best I tell you now and get it over with.

"I—"

You wanted to say it out loud. But you couldn't. You were afraid.

"You're perfect, Azul. And to me, you're someone worth loving. Always remember that."

You inched your face closer to his and placed your lips on top of his beauty mark, right near his lips, in a soft, sweet kiss. You meant for it to be short, but you couldn't help but linger there for a few more moments as poured your love into the kiss.

Is.. this what I think it is? A kiss? From you?

You later pulled yourself away. Your heart thrummed loudly and a pinkish hue dusted your cheeks. You could see the blush on his face as well but you didn't exactly know what he was thinking. You gazed at each other's eyes, trying to uncover the hidden thoughts and feelings.

I wonder what you're thinking.

I wonder what you're thinking.

I'm thinking a lot of things about you.

I'm feeling a lot of things for you.

But...

And...

"Goodbye, Azul." You gave him a bittersweet smile before turning away and left.

Wait. What? Why are you leaving?

You felt the familiar wetness in your eyes. You were about to cry again. You clutched your chest and bit your lip, trying to hold back the tears from falling again.

Just walk. Just keep on walking.

You told and willed yourself in your thoughts to keep going. To walk away and leave him behind. But a familiar pair of strong arms wrapped around you from behind.

"...Azul?"

"Where do you think you're going?"

"To... Leave?"

"Why?"

"Because..."

"Because you think I don't feel the same way as you?"

Your eyes widened in surprise.

"Let me tell you something, Y/N. You're wrong. And also, you missed."

Azul grabbed your shoulders and spun you around. He placed one hand around your waist to pull you closer and the other on the back of your head before leaning down to kiss you directly on your lips.

It all happened so fast. You got turned around. Your eyes just blinked and suddenly, his face was there and his soft lips were pressed against yours.

Your face became flushed with warmth and your heart raced so fast it might just leap out of your chest. He was kissing you. Azul was kissing you. On the lips. You were so shocked that even as he pulled back a bit, you stood there still as a statue, staring at him with a flustered expression.

"I love you, Y/N."

"What?"

"I love you. I know I'm not the best person there is but... I really want to be with you. Will you let me?"

The tears you tried to hold back came crashing down like waves from the ocean.

"Didn't you hear me?" You said while sobbing. "You're perfect, Azul. Perfect. Meanwhile, I'm just a nobody. I'm nothing. I don't deserve you, Azul."

Your cries reached Azul's ears and he was taken aback from your response.

"How can you say that? You aren't nothing!"

"But I am! You deserve someone else. Someone prettier/more handsome. Someone that's not boring. Someone that's—"

"Stop it."

"I'm just saying the truth. I'm—"

"I said stop, Y/N."

"But—"

He pushed you against the wall and pinned your wrists to your sides.

"It hurts me when you say that. You're worth so much more than you think, Y/N."

He kissed you. Again. And again. And again.

"You're the most attractive person there is. You're fun and you make me smile every time I'm with you. You make my heart go crazy. You're always in my mind. Only you make me feel like this."

He kissed you for every sentence that left his lips.

"You're the one I love, Y/N. And there's no one else I want except you."

"You... You really mean it?" You asked while looking at him through glossy eyes.

"Of course I mean it. I meant everything that I said." He pressed his forehead against yours. "And I'll keep reminding you every single day that you're worth everything to me. And that you're the only one I love."

You felt the genuine and passionate love he held for you and it resounded deeply in your heart. It made you cry even more.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

Emphasizing his promise to you, he cupped your face and kissed you once more. He felt your hands traveled to rest on top his hands as you kissed him back in response.

"I love you, Y/N."

"I love you too, Azul."

"Will you let me be yours and make you mine?"

His long fingers wiped your tears away again while he waited for your answer with bated breath.

You noticed how eagerly he was anticipating your answer. You couldn't help but giggle a bit and gave him a bright, joyous smile before saying your answer.

"Yes."

It was one of the best things that happened in your life.

Like the moment you said 'Yes' when he knelt down on one knee and proposed to you.

And the moment you both said 'I do' and shared a most heartfelt kiss as a symbol of your marriage.

Things weren't perfect. Life is full of troubles, after all. Some days, you felt insecure again. Some days, it was Azul thinking what he was doing wasn't enough and that he'll never be enough. But two of you were always there to pick each other up. You kept your promises and always made sure to tell and show each other how much they're not the negative things they think about.

That he is worth so much more.

That you are his everything.

That you will always love him for him.

That Azul will always love you for you.

Always... and forever.

Masterlist here!

If you enjoyed this: likes, comments, and reblogs are much appreciated. Thank you for reading!

[manicpixiefelix]

head, heart, hand. {Felix Catton/Reader/Oliver Quick}

Part 24.

Summary: The night of the Henrys dinner has you experiencing the extremes of friendship, as the distance between you and Farleigh only seems to grow further apart, while you, Venetia, and Felix proceed to get arguably too close.

{ masterpost }

Need to Know: They/Them. Explicitly NB Reader. FWB!Reader/Felix. Reader is from a well off family but has pretty much been adopted by the Cattons.

Warnings: SMUT; Felix/Reader/Venetia where the reader is the literal line between this being incest and this being just an incest-adjacent-but-definitely-still-taboo-grey-area. Drunk sex, oral (f receiving), reader's AGAB is never made specific.

A/N: 9442 words. HOLY SHIT. hello again friends, there has been so many different versions of the smut scene in this chapter, but im ultimately very happy and satisfied with what ended up in the final cut (I wrote this A/N and then rewrote the scene AGAIN (5th time I think I'm now at) and now I'm happy with the set up for it too 😌). that being said, i also rewrote the scene with Farleigh because I rewatched the Henrys dinner again and the original scene, while it would make sense emotionally in one sense, the scene I ended up with now I think works better, it still works emotionally but also it means he aligns both with the film and with the extra context the fic provides, yanno? if this chapter had you thinking or feeling anythings, you know i always love to know and hear them <3

TAGLIST IN COMMENTS!! // TAGLIST ALWAYS OPEN ! (just message or comment to be added)

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The minute you step into the dining room by Oliver's side, Farleigh shoots you a withering look. Unfortunately he's already seated, a Henry, and a Henry's Wife on either side of him, and Oliver's in your ear quietly asking where he's meant to be sitting himself. All you can do is direct him to his seat, anxiety once again beginning to bubble in your gut. When you mouth an apology to Farleigh, he rolls his eyes, and turns to the Henry on his left with a fake smile. Fuck. It had been a long time since Farleigh had been genuinely upset with you, and even longer since you'd actually deserved it the way you know you do now. All you can hope is that you get the opportunity tonight, or at the very least tomorrow morning, to talk things out with him.

Before you can get too caught up in your thoughts, however, Venetia is slipping past you with a tight smile, pinching your ass as she goes. You hear Felix, half a step behind her and having seen the moment, sigh her name with exasperation, but she just turns throws him a playfully amused smirk before she's making her way to her seat by Oliver. It is a surprise to think they'd come down together, but Felix explains quietly to you that he'd felt the need to speak to her about Oliver, about what happened. The two of you take your seats together, Felix sounding exasperated as he explains that Venetia had said nothing had happened between her and Oliver; you know Venetia's watching the two of you, even as you make a point of fixing your gaze on the array of cutlery before you.

"Ollie was right," Felix muttered, fussing with the stem of his wine glass, clearly wishing it wasn't empty, "she was so pissed she doesn't even remember coming on to him- why 's she got to be like this, honestly?" At least he sounds more disappointed than angry. When you look up, chancing a glance over at the woman herself, you see her staring right back at you. Felix is still mulling over his empty glass, but the look in Venetia's eyes as she raises a single, perfect eyebrow at you says that she knows exactly what you're being told right now.

And that she knows you know she lied to Felix.

That woman has absolutely no remorse; the way these lies are really beginning to build is making you feel even more queasy than you already were. Instead of giving her the satisfaction of any kind of reaction, you simply avert your gaze, tipping your head to the side to instead look at Felix.

"I think it's because she likes seeing you pout," you teased softly, tone light in an attempt to bring up his mood. Felix's expression immediately shifts to something both embarrassed and faintly pleased, already anticipating your praise, "it's a cute look on you," you continued, wetting your lips, "at least I think so." There's a faint blush on his cheeks now, expression almost bashful. For a moment his gaze flicks to his sister, who's thankfully looked away as the staff have begun to serve drinks, but just as quickly he's looking back at you.

"You're shameless," he mutters, trying and failing to fight off a grin.

"And what, dear Felix, would I have to be ashamed of?" Lips quirking into a smug, little smile, you take quiet joy in the snort of laughter that escapes him. You're glad to see his mood has turned around considerably before you let your attention drift away, striking up a conversation with Henry of Suffolk on your other side.

As always, your planning pays off over the course of the dinner, engaging in lively conversation with the rest of the guests, masking your nerves with a bright smile and thoughtful bouts of small talk with everyone around you. With each name and detail you remember, you see those around you growing more comfortable and amiable with you just as they grew more intoxicated. Nobody goes overboard, of course, well, at least not in a way that would be completely unacceptable, but spirits are high and the guests are more than eager when Sir James excitedly informs them all of the wide selection of songs their karaoke machine has since Venetia had asked him to update it.

"Does this mean we get to hear you attempt Crocodile Rock again, Jimmy?" Lord Henry, Sir James' godson and always a little too enthusiastic for moments such as these, is the only person in the world who you think would ever call Sir James 'Jimmy'. He's done it once or twice before that you remember, but it still catches you off guard, and the laughter that escapes you is almost undignified, not that anybody notices. Sir James himself laughs along, as the rest of the table seems thoroughly amused by the idea, though he claims he may need to open another bottle of wine before he considers stepping up to the microphone himself.

Once dinner has concluded, several of the guests, yourself included, opt to head outside briefly to smoke before retiring to the larger drawing room the Cattons used to entertain groups like this. Felix declines your invitation, choosing instead to check in with Oliver as the evening was progressing. Considering Oliver had only just stopped looking like a deer in the headlights whenever someone tried to make conversation with him, you were sure he would appreciate a more familiar moment of kindness.

You, however, were afforded no such kindness. Stepping outside, your attention is immediately caught on Farleigh, perched on one of the railings by the stairs, pointedly having removed himself from the others who had also chosen to take in the evening air. Elegant and beautiful and so clearly full of disdain, his eyes narrow as you make eye contact with him. Pulling your own ornate cigarette case from your pocket, you join him, asking to borrow a light. Silently, he offers his lighter, and you thank him quietly, feeling his ice cold gaze boring into you.

"To what do I owe the pleasure," he sneered, voice low enough that only you could catch his words, "of you deciding to finally grace me with your presence." It stung.

"Farleigh," you sighed, gaze imploring as you finally met his, taking a draught from your cigarette. But he in unwavering in his irritation. Sighing, you let your focus drop as you tried to recall the lines you'd prepared earlier, "I am not merry, but I do beguile the thing I am, by seeming otherwise."

Farleigh snorts derisively, letting your words hang in the air as he finally looked away, raising his own cigarette to his lips. The way he smiles hold absolutely no warmth.

"You know he's lying to you," there's a casual cruelty to Farleigh's voice that you'd heard so often in your life, but so rarely directed at you, "I don't know what he told you and Felix, but he's lying, I know what I saw -"

"I know he's lying," you admit faintly, "I believe you, Farleigh, I know you wouldn't fuck with me and Fi over something like this," you kicked the stone steps idly with the toe of your fancy shoes, trying to keep your own voice just as light, "and Ollie knows it too."

"Know what?"

"That I know he's lying," finally you look up again, meeting his gaze but having no idea what to read in his expression, "that I believe you despite what he told us."

"Does Felix know?"

Farleigh knows he doesn't by the way you immediately go quiet. There's genuine disgust in his voice when he calls you spineless, when he tells you that your so blinded by love that you can't see that this can only end badly. Part of you believes he's right, but you still try to have hope despite that.

"You don't get it," you finally huff, scowling in an attempt to hide how hurt you were by his words, "and it's not that you can't, it's that you don't want to," you jab him in the chest for emphasis, cigarette between your fingers, "because it's so much easier for you to dismiss Ollie out of hand since you've never liked him, or even bothered to get to know him. Isn't it fucking easier for you, Farleigh, to hope we turn against him so you don't have to keep putting up with him?" Lip curling into a sneer, the vitriolic way you speak surprises even yourself.

"I'm not the bad guy for giving a shit about you," his voice is rising despite how he was fighting to remain dismissive and nonchalant, "and not trusting a fucking stranger -"

"This isn't you giving a shit about me," you couldn't help but scoff, wine drunk and more than able to match his bitchy energy with your own, "you give a shit about you, Farleigh; you and your fucking pride," you spit, finding yourself altogether tired of his ongoing attitude towards Oliver and how he was trying to now mask it as altruism, "what happens if it all works out, what then, Farleigh?"

"It's not going to~" Farleigh sings meanly under his breath with that same humourless smile as before. Despite being toe to toe with you, he'd been avoiding eye contact as best he could, until now. There's something in his eyes behind the icy anger that almost looks hurt. Farleigh's voice is a whisper as he leans in, nose to nose with you, "and when it goes badly, when you let him break your heart, and my cousin's heart, when you finally realise that he's fucking using you because nothing will ever be enough for him," Farleigh's lip curls derisively as you feels hot, angry tears stinging your eyes, threatening to spill, "don't you dare come crying to me that you 'loved not wisely but too well', because I know," for just a moment you feel pinned by the intensity of his gaze in this moment as he turned Othello's words on you yet again, "and I'm fucking warning you now."

He steps out of your space, sighing loudly, as if completely oblivious to the tears on your cheeks and how he's torn your heart to shreds. But then, as always, he knows you well enough to intuit exactly how to twist the knife.

"Don't look at me like that," he rolls his eyes, "you know I'm right," then, eyebrows raised, he even has the gall to ask if you're even going to finish your cigarette, which had gone out. Shaking your head weakly, your running entirely on autopilot as you pass it over to him.

As you stand there, the air feeling too warm on your skin, your collar too tight, the taste of smoke and ash suddenly sickening on your tongue, despair wells up within you, choking you too from the inside out. Farleigh's words play on repeat inside your head, and you know you should leave, shouldn't engage further, you weren't in your right mind to begin with, drunk and a mess of emotions. But one thought sticks out, loud above all the others.

"Everyone uses me, Farleigh," you choke out, "you- you really think that bothers me?" And you look to see him shocked in the face of your teary anger.

"What?"

"If Oliver were to ask for the world, I'd give it to him," you tell Farleigh with a defiant scowl, not bothering to lower your voice as you wipes your tears roughly, "I can afford it after all. When it comes to the people I love, I can afford anything, or did you you and your pride choose to forget?" Everyone around you has gone quiet, all eyes upon the two of you, but none of them matter to either you or Farleigh in this moment. Standing as tall as you're able, you square your shoulders. Without giving him a chance to reply, you take your anger and lingering sense of betrayal as you turned on your heel and stormed back inside.

Tomorrow you were sure you'd regret making a scene, regret your harsh words and arrogance, but you had no idea how else to get through to him at the time. If Farleigh was jealous because of how loving and accommodating you were to Oliver, he'd need to get over himself. There was nothing you wouldn't do, no price you wouldn't pay, for the people who made you and Felix happy, you thought he knew this. What in the hell could ever reassure or even convince him if, after so much of your lives together, all the years and moments and love shared already, didn't make it abundantly clear that that meant him too?

Pulling off your suit jacket the minute you step through the doors, you throw it into the hands of a confused member of the staff, just telling them to put it somewhere for Duncan to take care of. However, before you can even find Felix amid everyone gathered in the drawing room, you find your focus, and your arm, snatched by a mischievous looking Venetia. Considering she and Felix appear getting along once again, you decide you have all the time in the world to humour the girl who'd never once been afraid to ask you for something she wants. Perhaps she'll be able to take your mind off of Farleigh and all he'd said. At the very least she hands you another glass of champagne.

"You've been so cold to me these past few days," Venetia pouted where she was clinging to your arm. It seems in the dim light and in her current state she is completely oblivious to the fact that you'd just been crying, thank god, "if you don't sing something with me, I'll start thinking you don't even like me." She's wearing that beautiful, dangerous grin of hers that she always wears when she knows she's on the edge of pushing your buttons about something. But in this moment Venetia is mean and pretty, and you're feeling tipsy and indulgent, so you let yourself be coerced by the sight of her smile.

"Careful, pretty girl," you teased with a smirk, letting her drag you over to Duncan who had been granted the role of overseeing song selections, "I might start believing you want me around."

Surprisingly, Venetia looks up from the song book in her hands, as if surprised by your accusation.

"As if anyone else would be half as good to me; of course I want you around, pet," and then immediately turns back to poring over song choices. It hits you in a way you hadn't anticipated, and you know part of that was due to your altercation with Farleigh. Still, it was the kind of fond sentiment Venetia was so often shying away from admitting that sometimes you genuinely forgot how much she actually appreciated your place in her life. So often it seemed that she took you for granted, and you played along because it never outweighed how much joy and pleasure you took in making her happy, even if it was often at your expense. But Venetia was just as much a masochist, and quietly loved that you so often gave as good as you got.

Duncan's expression doesn't change from its carefully controlled neutral veneer while he watches you and Venetia flipping through the song book. For a moment you recall how often you'd begged as a teenager for him to let you join the service staff at Saltburn for events like this simply so you wouldn't have to be looked at or talked to. He'd of course never let you, nor had Elspeth when you'd gone to her with the proposal. Still, he'd taken you aside during your third Summer and asked what it was about the events that made them so difficult for you. He'd been putting together detailed dossiers on the events at the estate for you ever since.

You still think you'd make a good team member for the staff, but to you, Duncan was utterly irreplaceable at Saltburn.

"Oh, this one, don't you think, pet?" Venetia asks, tugging you once more to bring your attention to where she was pointing out a Fall Out Boy song. The one where the groom finds out his bride is a whore; the nerve on her after what she did two nights ago. Keeping your composure, however, you raise an eyebrow at her.

"Thought you weren't a fan of that tragic, emo stuff," you smirked, to which Venetia rolled her eyes, scoffing for you to pick one then, "what about ABBA?" You suggested knowingly, "everyone loves ABBA" Despite her attempt at remaining put out by you, her mood picks up when you at least tell her she can pick the song, and she's grinning with an almost childlike glee at the idea. Still, you know you don't have to worry too much, there's only one ABBA song you know she'll pick.

As Venetia's adding her song selection to the list, your focus finally drifts back around the room. You finish your glass and note that Farleigh's finally slunk on from outside, taking up brooding in an arm chair in a particularly dark corner of the room and refusing to look anywhere but his drink. Finally, however, you spot Felix in conversation with Oliver, his arm around the shorter man's shoulders where they've staked their claim on one end of the wide, ornate sofa. For just a moment his gaze finds you, and he gives you and his sister the briefest exasperated smile, like he knows exactly what you've been talked into.

There's still a few others who have yet to have their turn, so the two of you decide to get yourselves another drink -

"Grab one for me too, will you?" Felix calls after you from where he'd settled himself on the sofa.

"Of course, my darling, useless brother," Venetia practically sings back, swanning past him with an arm once more firmly tucked in yours.

"Thank you, Vee, I love you too," you think you can hear Felix rolling his eyes fondly. Still, Venetia's giggling as the two of you make your way to the drink caddy in the corner of the room.

Venetia snickers quietly, barking at you so low only you could hear as you poured Felix a glass of champagne after your own, and a third for Oliver too. But you don't have it in your heart to be mad, and grin as you knock your shoulder with her's.

"Watch yourself, Ven," you warned her playfully. Her laughter lights up the little corner of the room you both occupied. Your lingering reasons to stay mad at her regarding her tryst with Oliver seem to be disappearing faster as the night went on. It almost definitely has something to do with the drinks, but you can't seem to bring yourself to mind.

"Why would I need to watch myself when I've got you to do it for me again," and she gives a little twirl as if to emphasise, which becomes twofold when you catch her by the elbow to steady her as she almost over balances, "see?" Her voice is low and flirty, stepping into your space as she picks up her champagne glass, "so don't get all bitchy again," but her tone is sweet when she teases you, "I need my knight in shining armour."

"It's called consequences," you chuckled, though you still let her wind her arms around your neck in a gesture that would be far too intimate for even this secluded corner of this setting if most everyone else weren't also inebriated, "if you insist on jeopardising mine and Fi's happiness you'll have to learn to take care of yourself."

"But you like being good to me," her smile is sharp and she leans in, her forehead against yours. This rare, unashamedly needy side of Venetia was really quite endearing. Groaning, you allow yourself to give in for just a moment, kissing her quickly.

"God fucking help me, I do," you agreed with a vaguely frustrated huff. Venetia actually giggles, tells you this is why she loves you, and send more than happy with this result to let you both get back to the task you'd been at the drinks caddy for originally. It seemed no one had taken any real note of the intimate moment in the corner of the room anyhow, it kind of just seemed that that was how this night was progressing all around.

When you get back to Felix and Oliver, both with a drink in each hand, she drapes herself rather inelegantly on the arm of the sofa by her brother after she hands him his drink. Oliver seems surprised when you hand him one too, looking at you, leaning against the back of the sofa, with this wide-eyed look of gratefulness. The four of you watch with quiet amusement as one of the younger wives of the Henrys makes a decent attempt at Total Eclipse of the Heart.

"What'd you end up deciding on?" Felix murmurs loud enough for only your little group to hear, and Venetia giggles when all she says is the name of the band. Felix's smile grows wider, turning fond as he looks from her, to back at you. When he makes a noise of understanding, even you can't help but grin, despite how Oliver's voicing his confusion. All Felix can respond with is, "it's a very old, very stupid joke," which Venetia immediately scoffs at, reminding him that it's 'our song' in reference to the three of you.

As they bicker about whether or not it's stupid - you're of the opinion that it is, but that's part of the reason why you love it - you lean down to murmur to Oliver with a smirk;

"Does Your Mother Know?"

As the realisation hits him, a startled laugh escapes him, his hand coming up to cover his sudden smile. Felix turns to him, leaning his head against yours, asking Oliver now to weigh in on whether it was stupid.

"Dunno; does she know?" He grins in return, eyes shining in the low, golden light of the room. You, Felix, and Venetia all burst out laughing at that, earning a scathing look from the man who'd just stepped up to take the microphone, and the four of you loudly try to both apologise and shush each other while unable to fight off your collective giggles.

By the time you and Venetia step up to the microphone, you have no idea where your jacket is, the top few buttons of your fancy jumpsuit are undone, and you can't stop smiling. It's as if your earlier altercation with Farleigh is almost entirely forgotten. For a moment, everything's easy again, everything's okay and bright and Venetia is by your side as the two of you pass the mic back and forth between you both. It's the most lively song of the night so far, and you can see Elspeth laughing into her wine glass as she watches you both with fondness.

A song that had once been put on by Venetia herself in an act of malice, blasting it from her little, portable CD player when she'd caught you and Felix making out by the lake as teenagers, had since developed into the soundtrack of countless bright memories. The three of you had cheered when it had come on in a club in LA none of you were old enough to be in, it was always on road trip mixtapes, and had been played throughout various hotels all across the world as you'd been getting ready together to go out on the town.

It was your song after all.

All you could think in this moment is how much you hated when Felix and Venetia were on bad terms.

When the song ends, there's a smattering of applause. You pass the microphone over to the next singer as Venetia takes your hand and pulls you back over to Felix, who's regarding you both with amused exasperation. Oliver's gone to get himself another drink, Felix tells you as Venetia drapes herself on his lap, and you take the now vacant seat beside him.

"God I haven't heard that song in ages," Felix snorts, arm around Venetia to keep her steady as she gets herself more comfortable.

"We should go clubbing again," you insist, head resting on Felix's shoulder, tucked up against his other side, then, "Vee, you should come visit us at Oxford some weekend!" However both Cattons beside you scoff dismissively at the thought.

"God, I wouldn't be caught dead at some dreadful, uni, bar night."

"That's mean, Ven, they're fun!" Felix's dismissal immediately turns to playful indignance, "I'm more worried about your bursting into flames the minute you try to step foot on campus."

"Why would I burst into flames?!" Venetia's eyes went wide, but Felix looks equally as bright and shocked.

"Because that's what you said would happen when mum asked you if you'd ever consider enrolling after I got accepted!"

Venetia's mouth snaps closed, embarrassed smile and faint flush giving her away as her own words seem to be coming back to her.

"Oh yeah," she mumbled, "right," then, after a beat, she looks to you, "do you have any smokes on you, pet?"

"For you, Ven, always," you teased, feeling all kinds of contented and warm in this moment, by their side. Pulling your pocket book out of your pocket, you offer one to Venetia before apologising for not having a lighter. Felix tells her he's got it before she can even stand, and grunts as he tries to keep her balanced on his lap while reaching into his own pants pocket to pull out a little, ornate lighter. He flicks it open, holding the flame aloft for Venetia, who rolls her eyes as she lights her cigarette off of it.

"I still can't believe you have a formal lighter," she snickers.

"I only ever use it here," Felix grins to himself, gaze fixed on the silver lighter in his grip as he flips it open and closed, "honestly I don't even think I'll bring my suit back to Oxford this semester, I only wore it once, and Y/N knows where we can hire them."

"Of course they do," Venetia gives you a knowing smile, and you simply shrug, your mood unable to be ruined by anything, even canine allegations, in this moment.

"At least I'm consistent," you smirked, and Venetia reached over, her tone both saccharine and teasing as she scratches beneath your chin and calls you 'good doggie'. Felix groans at that, as he always did, pressing his forehead against her shoulder.

"Why've you've always got to ruin things, Vee?" He asked, exasperated, but Venetia simply leaned further into him, wrapping her arm around his shoulders with a blithe smile.

"I haven't ruined anything, Felix; do you think I've ruined anything, pet?" Venetia's sharp gaze turns on you, and Felix turns his face to look at you too. All you do is shrug; right now you were taking her degrading nickname as a compliment.

"I can't believe you put up with her," Felix snorts.

"Because you haven't tasted the dog treats she buys me," you counter without even really thinking, though the minute Venetia starts absolutely cackling and Felix looks at you in absolute, horrified disbelief, you clarify, "I'm kidding, oh my god, Fi, I'm totally kidding!" Which thankfully is enough to alleviate his concerns, and he's then laughing just as hard as you and Venetia.

The others are looking at you again, the three of you lost in your own little world, but you can't even begin to care. Everything in this moment is warm and familiar and right. Your anxiety over events stands no chance when you're drunk and laughing with the Catton siblings by your side.

These were moments you loved. These were moments where you felt loved, where this house felt like your home. These were your people, Felix and Venetia, Farleigh too more often than not, and you knew, if given time, you could make Oliver feel just as loved, just as home as Saltburn had long since made you feel. But Farleigh and Oliver were far from your mind tonight; Oliver hadn't returned, and Farleigh was keeping his distance from you, and Venetia had kicked her legs out over you as your focus drifted back to the guests providing entertainment, trying to be a little less shameless, as Felix had so rightly called you earlier, about your love for them both. That being said, at least you weren't the only one... Why Henry had thought taking off his jumper like his rendition of Apple Bottom Jeans was a strip tease was beyond you, but at least it was amusing.

"Fuck it, I'm getting another drink," Felix announced, gently tapping on Venetia's thigh to indicate for her to finally get up and move. When she mentions that she could use one too, Felix is already offering you a hand, knowing you'd be coming along too.

The three of you make your back back over to the drink cart in the corner, all tipsy enough to enjoy bopping along to Henry's questionable singing to the catchy tune, each collecting another flute of champagne. Gaze scanning the gathering, your eyes zero in on the what you recognise to be Farleigh and Oliver together on one of the sofas facing a wall adorned by several royal portraits. Something about the sight, after your earlier conversation with Farleigh, makes you uneasy, and you find yourself finishing your drink quickly, turning back to the siblings in an attempt to distract yourself. Venetia's more than willing to pull you in to dance with her for the moment.

But then you hear it, and your blood turns cold. There's something about hearing Farleigh's voice rise brightly above Henry's singing, bringing the embarrassing display to a close, that makes a strange, guilty kind of anger flare to life in your chest.

Turning back, you watch with a dawning almost horror as he volunteers a clearly reluctant Oliver for the next song, one he is choosing for him. Unfortunately you know Farleigh too well to assume it's anything other than some sort of trap for your poor friend.

And much to your chagrin, you're right.

Oliver stumbles awkwardly through the lyrics he clearly doesn't know in front of a less than lukewarm audience. He doesn't seem to realise exactly what he's singing, that it's all a cruel joke, until -

"I love you-" Oliver's voice falters, falls as the next words flash up on screen, "you pay my rent."

But Farleigh's not looking at him, even as Oliver calls him over, tries to salvage the situation, insisting with as much ire as he can despite clearly being embarrassed, that it's Farleigh song too. Farleigh's looking at you, something vindictive in his gaze before he turns away, agreeing without hesitation, stepping into the spotlight without a shred of concern despite the song and it's less than kind implications.

That spiteful fucking asshole!

"No," leaves your lips as an involuntary, furious gasp. You don't even realise you make a start towards him until you feel Felix's hand holding your arm firmly, as if anticipating you better than you can.

"That's..." Felix doesn't have the exact words for it, part of him not wanting to believe his cousin was truely being malicious, but you knew better. Still, clearly he was as disappointed as you were angry.

"Come on, it's -" but Venetia stops laughing and just sighs when both you and Felix turn on her with less than approving looks. She rolls her eyes, arms crossed delicately over her chest as she shifts her weight from one foot to the other.

"I'm so fucking done with this," you hissed furiously, stalking out of the room. As much as you love Oliver and want to reassure him, you're in absolutely no state to do so.

While you don't exactly expect the Catton siblings to give up the remainder of their night for you, there's still a swell of gratefulness when you hear Venetia's heels against Saltburn's floorboards as she trots after you.

"You know usually -" you begin to rant, absolutely seething with rage as you blew past several bemused members of staff ferrying food and snacks to the drawing room, "- and yeah, I'll own up to this - usually it's my fault that I don't have fun at events like this," you turned on your heel suddenly at the bottom of the red staircase, feeling particularly dramatic and petty in your drunken fury. Venetia catches herself before she can run into you, watching you, letting you rant with amusement in her eyes. Not that that deters you in the slightest, "he's so petty, so fucking petty and vindictive."

"You know how Farleigh gets," Venetia's voice is still warm, despite your fury.

"Yeah, he's entitled," you hissed venomously, "I love you all to death, but you really all can be so fucking entitled, yes, including you," you added without a moment of hesitation.

"What'd I do?" Venetia laughed brightly, but you narrowed your eyes at her. She knows what she did. In the next moment, as if suddenly remembering, she raises her hands in mock surrender. But there's a softness in her eyes as she gently lowers her hands to your shoulders, reassuring you that they all loved you too.

Behind her however, coming out of the drawing room, Felix is approaching with a less than enthused expression.

"Ollie won't talk to me," he's actually pouting, "says he's fine," clearly Felix doesn't believe him, "says he just wants to be left alone," clearly Felix doesn't like that either.

"Y/N's calling us entitled," Venetia supplies with a candid kind of amusement. While Felix's expression turns to confusion, you groan loudly at her antics and turn on your heel, throwing your hands up in the air with exasperation as you head back through the house towards your bedroom, fully retiring from everything that has happened tonight.

"What are we being entitled about?" Felix asks, trotting behind you with his sister in tow. You don't dignify it with an answer, but Venetia snorts.

"Them, I assume."

"Oh," Felix contemplates for a moment, before picking up his pace to match your stride, "I'm sorry, I didn't -"

"It's fine, Fi," you sighed, taking his hand as he walked in step beside you, "I'm mostly just mad at Farleigh -"

"How come you're all understanding with Feef, but I get my head bitten off?" Venetia stepped up to your other side, tone incredulous as she keeps up with you both, "you'd let him get away with murder!"

Felix sticks his tongue out at his sister with a petulant kind of glee.

"God, I'm so tired of taking sides," taking the steps up to the second floor, you huff a long, world-weary sigh, "I just want to forget this night ever happened, honestly."

"I can help with that," Felix's tone is laden with smug innuendo, and finally you feel yourself beginning to relax, giving his hand a squeeze. Beside you, Venetia is quiet, but you can tell she wants to say something. Apparently Felix can tell too, however, as less than a moment later he says, "come on, out with it Vee, what've you got a problem with now."

"Will I be called entitled again if I say I'd appreciate their company tonight instead?" Venetia bites back at her brother as the three of you come to the end of the blue room and step into the long gallery. Felix's grip on your hand grows just a little tighter; you know he's trying to come up with some kind of response that doesn't make him sound entitled to you too.

"Don't make me choose," you muttered finally when you get to your bedroom, forehead pressed against the door, "please, I just want to be good to you both, you know this," then after a soft sigh you hear yourself whisper, "I just want to be good."

After a beat, Venetia laughs airily.

"Careful about what you're implying, pet," but she actually sounds coy when she says it. It hits you a moment later what she means, and though you initially tried to deny it, Venetia can't help herself but continue, "I mean, I know our family's blessed with good genes, but -"

"Venetia, you're the one who asked if I think about Felix when I fuck you," you turned on her, feeling altogether flustered at the idea and desperate for her to stop talking. Venetia turns bright red, letting out a mortified shriek, but surprisingly Felix is grinning at you.

"Do you?"

"I..." but you can't look either of them in the eyes, "not usually -"

"Ha!" Felix immediately turns to shout in his sister's face, but despite this, Venetia lights up as if thoroughly vindicated.

"I knew it! I fucking knew it!" She crows with a delight neither you nor Felix had seemed to anticipate, "'He doesn't have a cunt, Ven'," she parroted your own words back at you from long ago in a mocking immitation, "god you were so fucking smarmy about it too, I knew you were lying!"

"I wasn't being smarmy, I was trying not to hurt your feelings!" You couldn't help but laugh, given the situation, however Venetia, head held high, barges right past you, opening the door.

"What hurts my feelings, pet," she tells you suddenly sounding incredibly matter-of-fact, making herself at home on the edge of the bed, looking at you both still in the doorway, "is that I'm pretty sure you're better when you go down on me while you're thinking about Felix," she gives her words a moment to settle in before emphasising - "like distinctly, probably measurably better."

When you turn to Felix, you're not quite sure exactly what you're anticipating, but it's definitely not for him to be looking as ridiculously smug as he does at that moment. You know he can tell how embarrassed you are by this all, but he clearly is taking it as a personal victory.

"For the record, I'm not shit at giving head when I'm not thinking about you."

That stupid, beautiful, smug bastard just grins wider at you.

"Obviously you're good," Venetia rolls her eyes, "we both know I've put too much time into this part of our friendship for you not to be, but," she pauses, wetting her lips as she waits for you to look back at her. When you turn back she's leaning back on her hands, wearing a surprisingly similar, pleased look as she very obviously leers at you. Of course you both already know the answer, but she asks anyways, just in the hopes of hearing you admit it; "I'm right, aren't I, Y/N?"

"Why does it even matter?" You tried weakly, unable to look at either of them as you made your way to the dresser to start removing your jewellery.

"It's a matter of principle," Felix, why, you think to yourself when you can hear his big, dumb grin in his voice. It's enough to remind you that you're all still rather drunk, but not enough for you to stop the conversation from heading in a very dangerous direction at full speed.

"No, Felix, shut up -" Venetia orders almost immediately at the sound of his delight regarding the implications she'd put forth about you, and he protests, but she ignores him, turning her focus back on you, "you're a slut for my brother, you've made that abundantly clear," she rolls her eyes dismissively, powering on despite how you were left reeling by how casually she'd said it, "who cares, I've made my peace with it, but -!" Eyebrows raised and eyes suddenly shining with a terrifying amount of glee, she grins at you, "if my theory is correct, then after tonight, Felix can hold it over my head until I die, and I get one of the best orgasms of my life."

Oh! Okay, this was a legitimate offer. Huh. Wait. Why did it already feel like you were the last one to realise she was being serious? Why did it already feel like you were the only one left to agree?

You weren't used to Felix and Venetia being on the same wavelength... Though honestly, if quietly, you really weren't complaining the more you think about it.

As much as you fucked around with them both, had spent a countless amount of time sharing casual nudity in the field together over the years with endless teasing and occasional curious questions here and there, and had spent more than a little time speculating about Venetia's desires on your own time, you hadn't... At least, not since you were all teens, and definitely never together like this.

Yeah, sure, there had been definitely quite a few times where you'd been with one of the siblings, or Farleigh, while one - or a few times both - were there, around. Sometimes it was accidental, sometimes it was something of a dare, or a twisted game, or a strange type of learning experience, but you were dumb, horny teenagers being dumb, horny teenagers.

But there's no youthful naivety in the way Venetia's looking at you now. Surprisingly, however, Felix speaks up in favour too.

"It does mean that you don't have to choose between us," he points out, voice gentle and warm as he approaches you. You've gone still by the dresser, conflicted desire pooling low in your gut as you spent more and more time considering it. Felix drapes himself over your shoulders, voice low and enticing in your ear, his gaze focused on yours in the mirror's reflection, "and I want the chance to make you feel good after the shitshow these few days have been," he murmurs, though he can't help but smirk as he adds, "we all know you get off on being good to us too."

"Are you sure? It's Venetia," you reminded him, giving him a last chance at an out even if you know he won't take it.

"Yeah, but I'm not fucking her," he points out flatly, "and it's not like it's much worse than what happened during that layover in Dubai a few years ago-"

"You two are absolute animals for that, god, I forgot about that," Venetia practically cackled as your eyes go wide as you too suddenly recall the moment Felix was talking about, "I still can't believe Y/N's into -"

"Shut up, Venetia!" You hissed through clenched teeth, mortified at the memory of what she'd witnessed when you and Felix had gotten back from the hotel bar and toppled into the bed across from hers in the little hotel room, "you promised you'd never bring that up, on pain of death." Venetia only laughs louder. Still, Felix had a point; somehow this was much less embarrassing. At least for you.

So it takes you only a few more moments of deliberation before you inevitably give in to your collective desire. Just for a second, however, before acting on it, you find yourself seeing right through Felix's intentions and seductive tone. He of course did want to be good to you, you knew that to be true, and you did get off on getting others off, but there was a key part that he was purposefully leaving out. He knows you see it; his expression is scrunching with amusement already as he rests his chin on your shoulder, anticipating your next words -

"You really wanna hold this over Ven's head, don't you?" At your words, your bright laughter, Felix immediately breaks, doesn't even try to deny it as he's laughing too.

"I really wanna hold this over her head forever and ever, yes."

"It's not like you'll ever tell anyone," Venetia points out archly from the bed. Upon consideration, you both realise she's absolutely right, and Felix's face falls for a moment, though you pat his cheek in consolidation.

"We'll know," you reassure him, and he's bright once more, ascertaining that as long as the three of you know it's worth it; you're the only three who would give a shit in the exact, weird way he needs you to anyways. Venetia blows a loud, petulant raspberry at you both.

Glancing over your shoulder, suddenly more than a little nervous despite your excitement building too, you see Venetia still thankfully grinning. Felix steps back from you, heading to sit down by her side. The two of them now regard you with eerily similar, evaluative looks.

"I feel like Farleigh once warned us something like this would happen," Felix says with a half smile, glancing at Venetia as he pulled off his bowtie.

"Which is why - again - we're never ever telling anyone about this," Venetia says firmly, which Felix snorts a quiet laugh at as he agrees, "especially not Farleigh," reaching up, she unclasp her own sparkling ensemble where it was tied at the back of her neck. As she does so, her gaze fixes back on you, on where you were now hovering with nervous anticipation. You could feel your heart thundering in your chest very suddenly - this is not where you had expected this night to go, not that you were complaining, it was just that you didn't quite know how to proceed. God you hoped at least one of them would set up and take the lead, because there was no way you could bring yourself to even consider taking charge in this moment.

Before Venetia can even get a word in, however, Felix speaks up, teasing you in a low voice.

"Thought you didn't want to choose?"

"I didn't- I don't," you assured quickly, feeling all tipsy and giddy and nervous and excited all at once, frozen to the spot when you can't be sure which one you should be acting on, "this is definitely the perfect solution to that," you giggled nervously, beginning to fidget, before suddenly looking at Venetia in alarm, head whipping around to look at Felix, "but I'm not getting off to the fact that you're siblings, for the record -" Felix makes a noise of vaguely horrified surprised, but Venetia just laughs.

"You can if you want," she teases coyly, "if it helps." Helps you get her off, you know she means.

"Fucking Christ, Vee," Felix mutters under his breath, but you can hear his amusement. This, thankfully, has alleviated your concerns, and you grin.

"So we're all- this is -? I just- I didn't expect- are you both -?"

"I'm rather excited," Venetia smirks casually, standing and turning away from you, sweeping her hair over her shoulders as an indication that she needs you to undo the zip down the back of her jumpsuit, "part of me does honestly wonder if all those whorish noises you both make are still real," she speaks as if you're not even here, even as your hands glide over her, helping her out of her clothes.

"Hey!" Felix protests as he's beckoning you over, "those weren't meant for you!" Venetia pouts for a moment when you leave her side, but gets over it quickly, draping herself, nude, back across the bed you and Felix share.

"Se ducing the street rat?" She asks candidly, to which both you and Felix both tell her to be nice, almost in synch. In response, Venetia fakes gagging and mutters that she hates you both. Then, after a moment of deliberation, she idly mentions with a vague air of disgust that she doesn't want to think about Oliver and Felix together.

"I don't want you thinking about Oliver at all, actually," Felix says cattily as he's undoing the buttons of your jumpsuit, to which she rolls her eyes and calls him possessive, "do you want to leave?" Felix asks her with a frank, unimpressed look, "you can go if you're going to be a pain; you don't have to be here, Vee."

Venetia groans as if putting up with Felix in this moment was quickly becoming a much bigger downside than she'd anticipated, but she does agree to stay and not to talk about Oliver. Felix's expression softens then when he casts an amused look to you where you've finished making quick work of undoing his dress shirt. Once he too has you unbuttoned, you shrug off the jumpsuit, letting it pool by your feel before you kick it away. His hands hold your bare thighs securely, all bickering forgotten in this moment as he gazed up at you with nothing but affection in the way he's regarding you. Leaning in, you kiss him, unable to fight back your own smile.

"But if it turns out you're bad at fucking and Y/N's been faking it with you this whole time, I will tell Farleigh," Venetia warns sharply, interrupting your moment as she seemed unable to help herself from needling the two of you even now. Which may have been her plan all along, you realise upon seeing her smile as you both arc up with indignation at the implication.

If Felix is fucking you absolutely senseless out of spite, you all know she'll still benefit from it.

It becomes something of a blur after that, Felix rolling his eyes as he undoes your buttons while Venetia refuses to help you out of your clothes before it's a rush of sweat and sex and breathless pleasure, moments to breathe and more wine. The Cattons push and pull and puppet you for their pleasure, much to your own, and you lose track of how it should feel wrong when it really starts to feel so fucking right.

Venetia was absolutely right; you absolutely loved how spoiled and entitled they could be, especially if it's you and your body they're acting so entitled over.

Finally, on your back, legs wrapped around Felix's waist, you're bracedagainst Venetia's trembling thighs as she desperately rides your face. All three of you seem to know she's getting closer, and Felix fucks you in deep, steady strokes. But he leans forward, his hand coming to rest firmly on the back of Venetia's neck as she's gasping and panting. He pulls her close enough that their foreheads press together, Venetia, incoherent and eyes squeezed closed, and his other hand gently hold her face, thumb brushing against her cheek.

"That's it, Vee, show them how much you appreciate them," Felix mumbled encouragingly, and Venetia gasps at the sound of his voice, winding her arms around his neck, bracing herself against him as she grew steadily closer to her peak.

"You're such a freak, Felix," Venetia whimpers, as if she wasn't a completely willing and enthusiastic participant in the events, "I can't believe -" but then you whimpered against her cunt, tongue fucking her desperately as you dug the nails of one hand into her thighs, fingers of the other finding her clit and setting a relentless pace. The change had her swearing and moaning, sharing desperate panting breaths with her brother, never quite crossing that gossamer thread into something they both couldn't justify, that line in the sand neither could talk their way into coming back from.

"Let them get you off, Vee," Felix murmurs, "if you're gonna call them a dog, let them be a good one for you," you let out an appreciative noise, at his praise, keeping up how insistently, thoroughly you were fucking her with your tongue and fingers. Venetia comes with her forehead braced on Felix's shoulder, him holding her close, fingers running through her hair as she gasps and shudders, her thighs twitching either side of your head.

Venetia catching her breath shuffles back, breathing hard as she sat back against the bedpost at the foot of the bed, giving Felix the chance to focus on fucking you properly himself. In the next moment he's over you, has your knees pressed against your chest beneath him before your head has even stopped spinning from the sensations of it all. The way he's smiling down at you, all amused and affectionate - god, he almost looks proud - while his cock is deep inside of you at this new, perfect angle, its enough for you to know you won't last much longer.

"It's actually really gross how hot I find you right now, pet," Venetia's smirking at you when you angle your head to look at her, your expression one of dazed bliss. She reaches languidly down the side of the bed to where you'd left your jumpsuit, fishing around in the pocket for your cigarettes. You hear Felix's warm laughter as he presses his face against the crook of your neck, but thank fuck he doesn't stop, because you're so damn close. You've lost the ability to speak, to even really think, so caught up in the way you're coming undone under their combined attention and affection.

"You always this pretty when you're about to cum?" Venetia's voice is low and sultry, reaching out to caress your cheek with her free hand. She's sitting by you now, leaning down on her elbow to drink in the sight of you like this, "or just when Felix is being especially good to you?" And she kisses you messily, a pleased moan escaping her as she tastes herself on your tongue. Felix gasps 'fuck' against your collar, his teeth sinking into your shoulder as the feeling of you cumming around him tips him over the edge too. Venetia grins against your lips as you whimper and gasp into her mouth, hand fisting in her hair as the pleasure overwhelms you.

When you let her go, she's smiling softly, her forehead pressed to yours as you pant, trying to catch your breath, reorient yourself.

"They're always this pretty," Felix finally says a little breathlessly. Venetia laughs softly, sitting up again, though she takes your hand. Felix gently lowers your legs back to the bed before he moves to stand; you can hear the grin in his voice even if you're still to dazed to even sit up. It's with absolute bliss that you gaze up at the ceiling of stars you'd painted for him, watching the faintest traces that are still glowing.

"I think you're just always good to them," Venetia teases fondly before she gives your hand a squeeze, looking down at you, "he is, isn't he? He's such a loverboy when it comes to you, it's sickening, truly," but there's no bite to her words. There's a pleasant fog in your mind leftover from all the sensations you're still coming down from, so all you can do is beam up at her, nodding.

And when Felix laughs, you feel it light up in your chest.

"Can I borrow a robe?" Venetia asks idly, finally dropping your hand; she too stands, "my point has been well and truly proven, and I think I've had enough of you both for tonight." After Felix tosses her a robe, he offers you a hand to help you to your feet; he sounds somehow both proud and sheepish when he apologises after noticing how your legs are trembling.

With her sparkly ensemble and shoes in hand, Venetia's left the room before you even make it to the bathroom to clean up.

"Oh God," in the shower, Felix seems to be hit by a realisation that leaves him more than a little mortified, "I hope Ollie didn't hear any of that." The thought hadn't even occurred to you, and for the barest moment your expression mirrors his as your hand comes up to cover your mouth. Then, after another moment of consideration, Felix's seems to become more thoughtful than concerned as he utters, "actually," he deliberates, "is it weird that I think Ollie would be just as into that as we were?" He has a point, and you snort a laugh, shaking your head, and Felix's embarrassed laughter joins yours after only a moment more.

Unfortunately, as you would find out the following morning, not only was Oliver completely oblivious to the vaguely taboo tryst that had happened in the room attached his own, but it somehow wasn't even the most scandalous thing that had happened that night.

[hotheadedhero]

Hello, could you create a headcanon for ROTTMNT about what it would be like to date Leo, Raph, Mikey, and Donnie (separately) and what the pros and cons of those relationships would be?

AN: Ooh~ Yes, I like this! It's not completely sunshine and rainbows, after all :0

Pros/Cons of Your Relationship

Rise Turtles x Reader

Raphael

Pros:

Considering the sheer size of this magnificent creature, the hugs and cuddles you get are beyond comparison. There's nothing quite like starting/ending your day by being wrapped up in those glorious green muscles.

Is deliberately gentle due to his immense strength and has a great amount of self-restraint in his physicality when interacting with you, even when he gets wildly excited. Such as any time you visit him in the lair and he barrels towards you. It seems like it'll be a harsh impact and then he stops at the last second to avoid knocking you over. Adorable.

Never have to worry about being in danger with him around. This big lug will make sure you're in safe hands no matter the location, no matter the time of day.

Raph is unabashedly tender and kind. He'll be hesitant to say anything hurtful towards you and as such is careful with his words, especially when it comes to criticisms.

Cons:

May get slightly overbearing with how protective he is. He isn't being inherently controlling and his heart is in the right place but you wish he wouldn't worry so much, as sweet as it is.

Need to be careful leaving him alone for too long given his risk for going into savage mode. Can come across as rather clingy because of this.

Much like certain disagreements he has with his brothers, he sometimes has a hard time admitting when he's wrong. However, it's never usually about anything too serious but it can cause it's strains.

Leonardo

Pros:

Always knows how to make you laugh and tries his best to do such when you're feeling down. Some of his jokes are admittedly pretty terrible but you can't deny the fact that even the bad ones coax a smile out of you.

Enjoys spontaneity. Even if you're the type of person that struggles with getting out there or knowing what to do for the day, Leo always has something under his sleeve. Just call him the master of fun.

Whilst he's a jovial character, that doesn't mean he can't have his more serious moments, nor is he always completely blind-sighted to things if they seem too good to be true. Sure, he gets you two into shenanigans but he'll have your back if things seem awry.

Has also been shown to try to reconcile his mistakes and be sympathetic towards your plights, especially if he ends up being the cause of them. It may take him a moment or two to figure it out but he always finds a way to make right by you for his mistakes.

Cons:

Has an almost incessant need for attention and can come across as quite conceited. You find that he prioritises his own entertainment, so planning dates can often feel one-sided and uneven in mutual enjoyment.

Doesn't always know how to take things seriously, which can lead to your fair share of arguments.

Is known to be a compulsive liar and will engage in frequent fibbing when he worries about getting into trouble with you. With this, Leo can be disingenuous as it is not unusual for his charisma to take the form of false flattery just to get into someone’s good graces. Having become aware of this, it's sometimes difficult to take his compliments towards you as true.

Donatello

Pros:

Treats you like the absolute royalty you are. Being his loved one, he makes a point of giving the treatment he feels that you deserve. Whether that be programming S.H.E.L.D.O.N to give you special attention or hiding the last pizza box for you to share, he always makes you feel like number one.

Is always willing to help you out, no matter the issue. Donnie is a problem solver, at the end of the day, and will work on a solution to aid you. No job is too big or too small.

He is all about gestures of grandiose proportions, loving the dramatics as much as he himself is dramatic. His aptitude for being extravagant means that birthdays, Christmases, and anniversaries are often met with awe-inspiring displays of affection.

While he perceives himself as being emotionless, in reality, he is far from it. It isn't uncommon for him to become irritated, such as when he doesn't feel as though others listen to or appreciate his intelligence. That's why it means the world when he opens up to you about his transgressions.

Cons:

Unintentionally has a habit of being condescending or patronising towards you. You are aware that he is highly intelligent and that you won't always know the answer to something, but he needs to keep in mind that he isn't right about everything.

When he gets absorbed in his work, it's as though the entire world around him ceases to exist. This means that getting his attention can be difficult and often times you are left waiting until he's finished.

Despite his openness with you, your genuine adoration of his abilities isn't always met with gratitude. He longs for such praise but it carries more weight if it comes from respective elders. This unintentionally has you feeling irrelevant or that your opinion doesn't matter.

Michelangelo

Pros:

Makes killer meals for you. There doesn't have to be a special occasion for him to get passionately creative in the kitchen for you. He always goes all out to make sure your pallet is satisfied.

Best believe he encourages you to add some colour to your wardrobe and helps you pick out outfits. He's supportive of your choices and loves any excuse for a good fashion show.

He absolutely hates being dishonest to those he loves most and best believe that includes you. One might view it as a con but the fact that he dislikes lying means you never have to worry about him hiding something from you. It does make surprise birthday parties difficult to hide but you win some, you lose some.

Mikey is an intuitive family man and wants to keep you and everyone on good terms with one another. He acts as a brilliant mediator, keeping things fair and unbiased when assisting in such resolves.

Cons:

Sometimes he's a bit brash with conversations that involve telling you about particular problems. You appreciate the irony of 'Dr. Delicate Touch' but that persona is in dire need of a name change.

Being the youngest of his brothers, he may have certain complexes where doing tasks or upholding responsibilities are concerned. Even if it's obvious that something requires an extra pair of hands, he may refuse your help because of his need to prove himself.

Is easily frightened and often retreats into his shell instead of confronting the threat. This includes any challenges that may come from you, as well. You appreciate his fear of conflicts but he can't always hide away when something important needs to be discussed.

At the end of the day, no one is perfect. Far from it, in fact, but you take each other for what you are. As long as you're both happy and know how to have constructive conversations about glaring issues, there isn't anything to worry about <3

[ox-imagines]

Tokyo Debunker as Romance Tropes

Feel free to ask me to write a longer imagine/oneshot for any of these!

Pt. 1 | Frostheim

Kaito - Unrequited Love

Our favorite boyfailure <3 Kaito would be the type to fall for you and really try to get you to like him but never quite succeed unfortunately. So far he’ll crush on pretty much any girl who crosses his line of sight, but he’s got a sweet heart and spends most of his time with you, and would eventually develop real feelings for you, only to get consistently friend-zoned without ever really understanding why.

“I, I brought you some flowers! Again…”

Luca - Friends to Lovers

Unlike Kaito, this is the kind of friend who makes it easy to fall for him without him pursuing you relentlessly. You’ve been friends for almost as long as you could remember and he’s just a kind, forward, gentleman. He’d be the last one to realize your feelings for him, but would be honored and tell you how much you mean to him, and that he’d do his best to be the man you deserve.

“Thank you for trusting me with your heart. I promise, I won’t let you down.”

Tohma - Coworkers

You’ve been working with this man for a while now without too much interaction, he’s always polite although a bit curt, like he’s got something he urgently needs to be doing rather than talking to you yet is managing to spare you the time anyway. You eventually get put on a project together and after a few late nights in the office and a couple dinner meetings, he’s rather warmed up to you. One night while you’re working late and there’s no one left in the office, things take a turn and get heated.

“If you’re lucky, we can make this a more common occurrence.”

Jin - Arranged Marriage

He fought like hell to make sure this didn’t happen, yet here he is. With you. He makes it clear nothing will happen between the two of you and it’s strictly a business arrangement that will benefit his father’s company. He does the bare minimum to pretend you’re a happy couple at your wedding and in public. Over the coming months, as much as he hates to admit it, he finds it hard not to get used to having you around and maybe, just maybe, he feels a little something for you. Sometimes he wakes in the middle of the night finding you curled into his side instead of on your side of the obnoxiously large bed and, though he won’t admit it, he smiles just a bit and holds you closer instead of trying to move away.

“Damn. You’re determined not to make this easy on me, huh?”

[puppiekit]

One thing about the warriors Mapleshade hate train era of the fandom that still pisses me off actually is how people swore up and down that Mapleshade MUST be an unreliable narrator and so therefore nothing she expirienced or thought could be in any way accurate.

When in reality it was just the fandom making up bullshit headcanons out of thin air and portraying it as canon just so they can excuse Thunderclans blatant hatred/xenophobia, assault of a mother, and banishment of literal babies. Nobody wants to admit the fact that Mapleshade was severely screwed over and had every right to be pissed the hell off! (and don't get me wrong murder is inexcusable but like.... you guys baby so many other murderers in this series please stop playing)

Because outright saying "Mapleshade lying is worthy of assault and/or death" will reasonably earn you a WTF response, so people exaggerate her aggressors victimhood by making up bullshit about Mapleshade being a "baby trapper" or an "overtly possessive toxic girlfriend", and/or crafting some make-believe soppy sad backstory for Frecklewish. All to make Maples decision to lie seem worse than it in actuality was, or actively malicious in nature, and deserving of the recieved "punishment" (assault and death of her children).

Like... I cannot state enough how much it pisses me off when people discredit *the literal POV expiriences of the book protagonist* just to make up random crap about her clanmates and craft some elaborate tale where Maple is the worst and has sucked all along. When we know literally nothing about them, and especially Frecklewish, except that she made a stupid assumption, is willing to beat a mother in front of their kids, and quiet frankly didn't actually give a shit about those kids the moment she realized they weren't blood related. LOL

Like completley out of nowhere people decided Mapleshade lying was the worst crime ever commited in the history of the series... UNLESS you're literally any other character in the series to do it like Bluestar Leafpool Squirrelflight Yellowfang etc etc etc.... When they get flack for lying it's unfair and they were doing what they thought was right! But also it's completely unacceptable for Mapleshade to lie about her children's half-clan heritage in an environment where her peers are violently hateful and xenophobic. Because it hurt their feelings ... LOL

And don't even get me started on the fact that, quiet frankly, Frecklewish and Oakstar were being unreasonable from the very beginning by being hateful and blaming Riverclan for their loved ones death. They literally sent their son/brother INTO BATTLE and are now mad that he DIED? What the hell do they think happens when you send people out to beat eachother up (often to the death)??

Battle and death is such a normal and accepted part of clan culture it genuinely baffles me people dont realize that, as understandable as their grief, their anger/hatred is pretty crazy, even if Appledusk *had* killed Birchface. They were wrong to assume Birchface was the father and they were wrong to project their hatred on Mapleshade and her kits. Not a single action made by them was reasonable or excusable. You don't put that kind of pressure on a single mother who *explicitly avoided stating her kits father* and get all mad when it isn't who you assumed it to be. Like it's next level stupidity

[xothatnerdykid]

i despise my rotten mind (and how hard it fell for you)

Everyone in the LOV and PLF knows you're Dabi's girlfriend. But it seems a certain little bird can't help but want what he can't have. Keigo Takami/Hawks x gn!reader. Set between S5 & S6. SFW. 2k words.

"Hey pretty bird, whatcha doing out here all alone?” 

Keigo’s face breaks out into an easy grin when he sees you on the rooftop, legs dangling over the edge, lperched on the edge of the rooftop, a solitary figure amidst the sprawling cityscape below.

“Oh, you know, just…” You gesture vaguely. “Enjoying the view.”

“But I only just got here,” He smirks, sitting down beside you. 

"It's a good thing I'm here then," he smirks, sitting down beside you. 

You shake your head in wry amusement at his usual attempt at flirting.

“So, where’s that good-for-nothing boyfriend of yours?” 

You snort, putting out your cigarette. Even though he’s the one who approached you, you know Keigo doesn’t smoke, and you don’t want him inhaling any of that acrid stench you love so much.

“Dunno,” you shrug, rubbing the butt of your cigarrette down into the concrete. “Out on an important mission, I guess.”

“You guess?” He rests his arm up on one knee and leans against his hand to look at you, that same old dopey look on his face. “Doesn’t he tell you what he’s up to?”

You shake your head. “I’d rather not know, actually. Helps me keep some peace of mind.”

He nods, seemingly understanding. 

There’s been so many times knowing too much about Dabi has left you on the precipice of despair. He was complicated and intense, but also strangely intoxicating. And no matter how hard you tried — and god knows you’ve tried — you just can’t seem to quit him, not unlike the filthy habit you’re holding between your fingers.

But Keigo...Keigo’s a different kind of dangerous. 

You met him by chance at a Liberation Front meeting, the last place you expected to run into the Number 2 Pro Hero. He introduced himself to you with confidence and ease, and you remember thinking you'd never met anyone quite as bold and abrasively charming before. He was playful, flirtatious, and easy to talk to. 

And you're not proud of it, but you discovered that night that he could make your heart skip a beat with just a smile and a teasing tone. He had a way of making you feel like the center of the universe, showering you with attention and adoration.

Where Dabi was icy cold, he was warm and inviting, his effortless charisma a stark contrast to your boyfriend’s brooding darkness. As the weeks into months and your relationship with Dabi deepened, so did your connection with Keigo. The chemistry between you was undeniable, a force that pulsed with intensity. His presence in your life threatens to unravel all your carefully constructed boundaries more and more with each passing day.

Now here you are, alone with him when your boyfriend was away, the warmth of Keigo's attention a momentary respite from the shadows that chase you. A fleeting taste of something simpler and brighter amidst the chaos.

“Besides,” you smile. “I've got enough excitement in my life as it is.”

Keigo chuckles, his golden eyes sparkling with mischief. "But wouldn't it be nice to take a break from all that and let me fly off into the sunset with me?”

You snort at that, rolling your eyes. "You really do have a hero complex, don't you?"

He grins, leaning in a little closer. “Guilty as charged. But there's nothing I'd love more than to see that beautiful smile of yours, pretty bird.”

You feel the warmth of his breath, and your heart races a little. Your own voice sounds shaky and small even as you try to tell him, "You know I'm with Dabi."

"I know," he says but he doesn't pull away, the smile slowly slipping from his face. "But you deserve so much better than him. Better than what he can give you.”

His words hang in the air, swirling around you like lingering smoke, thick with unspoken implications. The tension between you is palpable, in the pounding of your heart and the blood rushing in your ears at his growing proximity, his hesitant touch.

You know you’re playing with fire, teetering on the precipice of something with Keigo. But even as you dance closer towards the edge, your heart still aches for Touya. Your relationship with him casts an inescapable shadow, one that not even Keigo’s eyes, though brilliant and golden as the sun, can extinguish.

“Touya...” you put your hand on Keigo’s chest, fingers curling into a fist but unable to muster much strength to push him away. “Touya loves me. Or at least, he tries his best to.”

Keigo laughs again, but this time it’s bitter and humorless. “You sure about that?”

“Don’t be a jerk,” you frown up at him. “It doesn’t suit you.”

His lips curl into a sarcastic smile. “Yeah? Does it suit Touya?”

“Fuck off.” You finally shove him away. His words sting, his bitter laugh like a poisoned arrow. But you’re determined not to let it pierce your heart. You make a point to light another cigarette  and blow the smoke right in his face. “And here I thought he was your friend.”

The moment abruptly broken, Keigo slumps again against the leg he's propped up on and gives a non-committal shrug. “I don’t hate him, that’s all. Actually, I’ve come to understand him a little bit better the more I get to know him, and I even feel a little sympathy for the guy. But he’s a dangerous person to get close to.”

You twirl the cigarette in your fingers. “You should take your own advice then.”

“Fair point,” it’s his turn to snort at you. “But I'm serious. Dabi…he's like a wildfire. Unpredictable and chaotic. He could consume everything, including you.”

“He has a different side, Keigo. You've seen it, too.”

A faint shadow passes over his features. “I have. But I've also seen the destruction he leaves in his wake. I don't want you to get hurt.”

“I don’t need you to save me.”

“It’s not that. I know you care about him, but…” He swallows, and you ignore the fluttering in your chest. “I care about you too, pretty bird. More than you realize.”

You shouldn’t be with him. You should be with me.

You know what he means, what he’s not saying. The question lingers in the air, unasked but ever-present. It's a question you've been avoiding, one that could change everything. You know what he's telling you, but you’re still unsure of whether or not you should pretend not to. 

The silence that drags on between the two of you feels like charged electricity. You’ve never known what to do with it, nor what to make of all the barely concealed flirting behind his playful banter. It's not like you haven't noticed the stolen glances and secret smiles he's given you over the past few months. It's just that it never seemed serious.

Until now.

You shouldn’t be with him. You should be with me.

Do you want to be with me?

You don’t have an answer.

You laugh instead, a wry and sharp sound. “Yeah? You wanna save me, hero? You think I’m better off with someone living a secret double life, working for some very morally questionable people?”

He doesn't flinch at your words like some small part of you hopes. Instead, his expression softens, eyes flickering with something like somber regret. You've never seen him look like that before. 

"You’re right. I'm not the hero everyone makes me out to be, the one you see on TV and in magazines. Sometimes I do things that keep me up at night." 

He smiles ruefully, gazing at you with an intensity that's impossible to ignore. 

"Like letting myself think about you."

The weight of his words settles over you, heavy and inescapable. He’s offering you something maybe Dabi never could — a chance at something real. But you know it’s not that simple. Your heart is entangled in a mess of loyalties and affections, and the thought of untangling it is terrifying.

“Keigo...” you whisper, carrying with it a depth of emotion you hadn’t realized you were holding back. It feels like an admission, a plea, and a confession all at once.

“Maybe I do live a double life,” he continues, “but at least it’s a life where I’m trying to make things right. A life where I can be honest about who I am and what I feel.”

He takes a step closer, the space between you dwindling to almost nothing. He lifts a hand and gently tucks a stray lock of hair behind your ear, his touch lingering just a moment longer than necessary. The warmth of his fingers sends a shiver down your spine.

“I care about you, too,” you admit, the words spilling out before you can stop them. “But I don’t know if that’s enough.”

“All I know is I can’t keep pretending,” he murmurs, his voice low and laced with an urgency that makes your heart race. “I can’t keep pretending that I don’t want you. Every time I see you with him, it kills me a little inside.”

“But… Dabi…” you start, your voice faltering as you struggle to find the right words. “He needs me. And I—”

“He doesn’t deserve you,” Keigo interrupts, his tone firm but not unkind. "He can't make you happy the way I can."

Before you can overthink it, you find yourself leaning in, drawn towards him like a moth to a flame. His eyes widen slightly, as if he hadn’t dared to hope that you’d close the distance between you. But as your lips hover inches from his, there’s a breathless pause.

“Are you sure about this?” you ask softly. “Because once we cross this line, there’s no going back.”

Keigo’s gaze softens, his hand cradling your cheek as if you were something precious. “I’ve never been more sure of anything.”

You close the remaining distance, your lips meeting his in a searing, almost frantic kiss. Keigo responds with a hunger that matches your own, his arms wrapping around you, pulling you closer until there’s no space left between your bodies. His lips are soft and warm, and the taste of him is intoxicating.

The kiss deepens, growing more urgent and messy, as if all the unspoken words and repressed feelings of the past months are pouring out through this single, electrifying connection. His hands move to your waist, fingers splaying across your back. There’s a raw intensity in the way he kisses you, a desperate need to convey everything he’s felt but never had the chance to say.

You respond in kind, your hands sliding up to tangle in his hair, pulling him even closer. The world outside ceases to exist; there’s only the press of his lips against yours, the sensation of his breath mingling with yours, the feel of his heart beating in time with your own.

When you finally break apart, both of you are breathless, chests heaving. Keigo rests his forehead against yours, fingers cupping your jaw gently. 

“You have no idea how much I’ve thought about this, about you," he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion.

You smile, a small, shy smile that feels like a secret shared just between the two of you. “I think I have some idea,” you reply, your voice trembling with a mix of exhilaration and relief."

Keigo's eyes search yours, as if looking for confirmation, for reassurance that this is real. “So, what now?” he asks softly, his thumb brushing against your cheek in a tender, almost reverent gesture.

“Now… we figure it out,” you say, your voice steady despite the whirlwind of emotions inside you. “Together.”

Keigo’s eyes light up with a mixture of hope and determination. He leans in for another kiss, this one softer, more lingering, as if savoring the moment. When he pulls back, his smile is as radiant as it is playful.

[peachshadows]

With lmk s5 finally released i promised ya'll that i would post a chapter of scum villain rip off so here it is! Just a bit of context this is basically where Wukong gets trapped under the mountain leaving Macaque to rule alone in FFM with an appearance of Erlang Shen.

---

“Y’know, monkey, your very existence annoys me.” He leans against the cavern wall, nonchalantly looking at his nails as if that was more interesting than being choked by hot coal.

Wukong spits out the burning coal. He honestly lost count how many times his throat and tongue practically melted and regenerated. Over and over and over again. It was torture. But not as torturous as talking with Erlang Shen. “Tell me something I don't know.”

Erlang Shen lets out a serene smile as if he remembered something fond and that alone makes him want to spit the coal at his stupid face. “Well then, would you like to hear about how our dear Macaque is faring?”

Hearing Macaque’s name made all the noises in his head go quiet. Just hearing his moonlight name was enough to soothe him like a calming balm on his soul but what frankly canceled it out was Macaque’s name coming out of the shameless god’s mouth. 

“…Macaque?” He whispered brokenly, his throat reforming itself.

“Yes, yes. He’s been so stressed lately.” Erlang Shen turns to finally face him, a cruel smirk dancing on his face. “Taking over a kingdom can be quite taxing but don’t worry he’s in safe hands, better hands than your bloodied demonic claws-”

“Do NOT touch him,” he snarls at the god because how dare he? How dare he touch someone that was his to take care of, his to love and devote his entire being to. How dare this second rate being have the audacity to even mess what’s his. 

Erlang Shen laughs, high and mighty; cruel and cold. “And what are you gonna do? Defeat me? If anything, this great one is doing you a favor.” 

If he could, he would’ve already punched the living shit out of the god. Alas, he’s stuck under a mountain where he doesn’t even get the luxury of seeing the sun. But, he does get the unfortunate luxury of talking with Erlang Shen. So he tries to even his breathing. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Do you really need this great one to spell out for you, Great Sage?” The god spits his title like it was something disgusting. “He’s happy, joyous now that you’re gone.”

“You lie-”

“And why would this great one lie? You’ve been nothing but a nuisance, a hindrance to him.” Erlang Shen gets closer, slamming both of his hands above Wukong, baring his teeth as if he’s some demon and not a powerful deity. “Your greed, your lust for power drove Macaque into a corner where he was left with a decision of either sacrificing his idiotic friend or have the rest of your people be slaughtered. And he chose smartly.”

His first instinct was disbelief, a cruel joke that the god is telling him. But the more that Erlang Shen spoke, the more he’s painted a picture of Macaque, smiling freely and unboundedly, with all the citizens of Mount Huaguo at his side, and the worst part, he can clearly see Erlang Shen beside Macaque as the two make a powerful beautiful duo. A match made in heaven. Who else can deserve Macaque but a powerful high ranking god?  

“…He chose you.” 

The god smirks at his defeated figure before summoning his spear. “Goodbye, Sun Wukong. I have more important matters to deal with.”

And finally leaves the False Sage Equal to Nothing in a burst of light. 

And if the earth could hear him, they would’ve heard his screams of anguish and anger practically shake the mountain. 

—

It’s been 502 years since Wukong’s imprisonment, or rather his supposed “death,” and Macaque knows by now that his king is already on his journey, gathering as much power and maidens in his grasp as he can before he reaches back to Mount Huaguo. He can’t help but feel a pang of dread at the thought of Wukong returning. 

There was no turning back. No amount of kindness and servitude can save him from his inevitable death by Wukong’s hands. 

He kneels for however long right before where the staff–his king’s rightful staff–used to lay as he mulls over his options now. Could he escape? No, that would just lead to death as well. Maybe, he can beg for mercy? No, that wouldn’t make sense with Macaque’s character. Maybe, he could-

“Mihou-shixiong, there you are.” He turns to see Rin Rin in all her soft glory, gripping her hands in a nervous manner. The absence of Wukong must’ve really gotten to her if he could practically see the worry affecting her usually cheerful face. 

“Rin Rin,” he says softly, standing from his kneeled position as he approaches her. “How are you? I know Wukong’s absence has been affecting us all but-”

She shakes her head. “Not as much as it's affecting you, Shixiong. We’re all worried for you.”

Affecting him? Of course it has been affecting him, he will soon die a painful death, Rin Rin!

“You barely draw anymore. You go outside only to visit Wukong’s shrine. And you only accept visitors when it's the Generals or Erlang Shen. At least let Qi Xiaotian accompany you. I know you two have gotten close over the past centuries and he understands the pain you’re going through.”

That stuns him quite a bit. She’s not exactly wrong…He has stopped drawing ever since Wukong’s imprisonment but who can honestly blame him? Seeing the protagonist draw was an inspiring thing and without that, it just felt silly to continue on without him. He does only visit Wukong’s shrine but only because it was the only quiet place where no one would disturb him. Ever since Macaque was crowned as regent king, beings of Mount Huaguo always sought him out for solutions of problems or even just so they could stare at him and whisper behind his back. It was humiliating being the center of attention. It’s quite frankly the first time Macaque ever got nervous in front of people. So he hid. Only ever allowing General Liu, Erlang Shen, the General, Rin Rin, and MK to visit him. 

But he doesn’t voice those thoughts out, instead he returns to kneel in front of the empty shrine and continue on as if Rin Rin isn’t there. 

He hears Rin Rin let out a sigh filled with frustration, but instead of leaving, she kneels along with him, leaning her head on his shoulder. Hopefully, Wukong doesn’t find out about Rin Rin needing a shoulder to cry on or else…he shudders thinking about the many ways Macaque gets tortured. 

“Your sworn brothers are asking for you,” she mumbles.

“...What do they want?” he eventually asks.

“You’re needed at their kingdom.”

“Can’t I just ignore them?”

She snorts quietly. A small smile formed on her face. “It’s urgent, Macaque.”

It must be really serious if she’s calling him by his name and not by his title. So with a great sigh, he reluctantly says, “Fine. Gather some disciples and get General Liu to accompany me.”

[dashofmonsters]

Dreamers & Delusions- Pt. 8

merman x female reader

After you finally agreed to live with Tao he told you to take a few days to heal up. You were worried that you'd get fired from your job being out so long but apparently on his little jog out to get you clothes he also stopped by the diner.

He informed Mikey that you won't be back in for a few days due to your injuries. He also mentioned that he may or may not have threatened him after he said some horrible things about you under breath. Apparently Jes was there to stop him from beating Mikey black and blue.

You spent the first day just lounging about in the nest room, reading your romance novels you've stashed away at Tao's. He had to go back to the beach to asses the damage and help with clean up. When he came home he looked drained but quickly perked up when he saw that you made dinner

The second day Jes came to visit and the two of you talked up a storm.

"Girl you are so lucky to be alive right now! You could have fucking died!" She shakes you before giving you a rib crushing hug.

"I know, I know. I just couldn't be there anymore, I needed to get away," You cry against her shoulder and sigh.

You give Jes the run down of that fateful night and leave nothing out. She listens, shaking her head here and there and holding back tears when you talk about how terrified you were.

"And I've been here since. I don't know if he's told you, but I'm moving in with him," you tell her as you wipe your eyes with your sleeve.

"I think that's for the best, but what about... well, you haven't been to keen on getting any closer to him because of the... you know, mates subject," She sighs and scrubs her face.

"I'm trying not to think about it. I'll still keep him at a healthy distance, even though he seems to want the opposite. Not sure if he's taking this fake dating seriously or if he's just being over protective of me because he sees me as his shoal mate," you shrug.

Jes' brows hike up her forehead and she grins, "Shoal mate?"

"Like werewolves have pack members Jes, nothing special," you glare.

"Sure sure, and I'm guessing all those clothes and lacy things aren't special either?" Her grin widens.

"Jes, no. He's just being nice, he even said it was because I didn't have anything to wear and all," you roll your eyes and groan. "Besides he would probably buy even more expensive clothes for his mate, treat her even better and all. I'm just practice, that's all I'm ever good for."

Without warning a hand clamps down on your face and shakes you, "You listen and you listen good, I am sick and tired of hearing your woe was me bullshit! You are kind, smart, dependable, funny as fuck, and loving as hell and if no one can see that in you, they don't fucking deserve you. Tao included ok?"

You nod your head and whimper, "But when he finds her won't h-"

"And what if you are her? What then?" She asks you.

"How can it be me though? There's been no sign, no marks, no moment where we look deep into each others eyes and just 'know'. There's nothing Jes, just two friends who are fake dating," you start blubbering, tears rolling down your cheeks again.

You've bottled up these emotions for days now, unable to vent them since you're in the same living space with the merman who's causing them. You needed this, needed to talk to Jes and just let it all out.

"A part of me wishes he wasn't so goddamn nice to me ya know. Like it'd be so much easier to fall out of love with him. And now look at me, I'm about to move in with him because it's safer here than with my own fucking family. I can't win Jes, I can't," you sob into your hands and she pulls you in for a hug.

"You'll be alright sugar, maybe not now but eventually. I'm not going to sugar coat shit and say things will be fine because I'm no fortune teller girly. This is going to be a fucking journey, but it's all about how you navigate until you reach the end. Nobody needs to get hurt ok?" Jes pulls back and wipes a tear from your cheek. "But if he does hurt you, I will be more than happy to put my foot up where the sun don't shine."

You manage a teary chuckle and nod, "Thanks for being real Jes. I guess I needed to hear that and not some fake positivity bull shit."

"I don't do that wishy washy fake support girly, I tell it like it is," she grins and winks.

After you calm down Jes segues the conversation from you and Tao to her and her wild fae fiancé. You start cackling when she tells you about the gifts they've already received from friends and family. Apparently it's common practice to gift some fun things for the bedroom before the wedding so they can enjoy them afterward. Jes admits that she's lost count of how many of these gifts she has received.

"But here's the real kicker, because he's a wild fae our wedding has to be officiated by a wild fae who has worked law between both worlds for it to be legal in both," Jes sneers and tosses her hand back and forth.

"Won't that kind of be near impossible? Aren't wild fae against going into law? I thought they'd be more free spirited?" You try to imagine someone with wild hair and wild magic working in a court of law and quickly shake your head.

"That's what I thought, but there's one. Just one, fresh out of college too. He has a degree in law in both worlds. His name is Varen, very straight laced and way too normal for anyone to look at him and think wild fae. But Artek told me that this kid's one hundred percent a wild fae, could tell by the ebb and flow of his magic," She explains and goes into greater detail about this weird wild fae.

That conversation lead to another and another, talking and bitching turned to joking over lunch and eventually, like all good things, ended after cake. Jes left and you felt lighter though the dread stayed pooled in the pits of your stomach. It was manageable now, but still there.

You distract yourself by starting on dinner. You take it easy as to not overdo it and reopen any wounds again. You've splashed some healing potion on yourself this morning but should probably cleanse yourself with another dose soon.

Little by little you get everything together and toss it into the oven. Easy, simple bake for a dinner. While it does its own thing you whisk away to the bathroom and quickly strip as you run the bathwater. You've just finished pouring the potion into the bath when the door flies open haphazardly and Tao freezes.

You can't help but to laugh especially when he attempts to close the door that keeps slipping from his grasp.

"Dude you've seen me naked probably a dozen times now, nothing you haven't seen," you plop into the bath, still laughing.

You hear the door shut and Tao sighing and to your surprise you see him sitting right at the closed door. He looks a bit roughed up and tired as hell.

"Tough day at work," you ask as you settle in for a soak.

Tao groans, "Tough would be an understatement. Two vacant houses tumbled and shattered onto the beach during the storm. We started out with plenty of volunteers but once they realized how much work goes into the clean up, well we lost a good sixty percent."

"Sixty percent?!" you turn and nearly slip against the tub.

"And if that wasn't bad enough, a certain someone came to the beach looking for you," he adds with disgust that he doesn't even attempt to hide.

"You've gotta be shitting me... She came to the fucking beach after all that had happened?" you ask.

"She was cordial at first since there was a lot of people but when I wasn't giving her the answers she wanted she started saying horrific things about you in relation to, well, to us," he says.

You know how unhinged your grandmother can be with insults and name calling but to slander you or Tao, especially Tao, in public, that was crossing a whole new fucking line.

"What did she say?" you grit your teeth and exhale, trying to remain calm.

Tao doesn't say anything, but you hear him clear his throat and shift. You turn in the tub, keeping low enough that only your shoulders and up are visible, "Tao, what did she say?"

He looks at you and looks down, "She said a great deal of things that I am very certain would cause you to become quite enraged."

"I need something a little more specific buddy. How bad was it?" you keep pushing, knowing that Tao isn't fully comfortable with this but you need to know.

"I'm not sure if I-"

"If I promise to remain calm will you fucking tell me at least one goddamn thing she said?" you nearly yell, starting to get frustrated.

Tao's eyes widen but he nods his head, "She said...well she compared you to your mother saying that you're some slut for dating me and that I'm some freak with a human woman fetish that's lowering whatever qualities about you that would be desirable to human males."

You promised to remain calm, and you're no liar. Instead you start getting out of the tub. You quickly wrap a towel around yourself before Tao can say anything but to your surprise he seems rather speechless. His eyes are back onto the floor and there's this limpness to him. You squat down next to him and he doesn't flinch.

"There's more to this isn't there?" you ask.

"I couldn't say anything... I couldn't defend you or she'd know where you were. I wanted to tear her apart so bad, not physically of course, but I wanted her to know how wrong she was," Tao admits.

You lean up against him and he stiffens a bit before relaxing. He smells of the beach and whatever trash was on beach and it makes you crinkle your nose.

"I'm going to go get dressed and finish up dinner while you take a much needed shower. Let's try to get me moved in asap. I don't think I can tolerate my grandmother any longer," you shimmy up against the door to stand up as Tao shoves up and wobbles.

He seems a little off but mostly tired.

"Try to get some rest tonight ok? We have plenty of time to talk till we both pass out," you smile at him before leaving to go get dressed.

You throw on some comfy pajama bottoms that Jes bought for you and a large shirt that Tao had got you with all the other clothes. You slip into some comfy slides and head to the kitchen to check on dinner. It's a simple chicken bake that your older brother used to make and it made you feel like a normal kid when you ate it.

You wanted to share with Tao a taste of your world since the both of you always cooked his style. It's not that he can't eat or doesn't like to eat normal human food, it's just that you've been busy practicing his style for a while now.

It's just chicken breasts baked over carrots and potatoes that you've oiled and seasoned properly, but this was the one thing that kept you going on the hard days. You made it for your younger siblings when your brother got older and left, but it was never quite as good as his.

You start prepping some broccoli to go with it, something you added so everyone could get their vegies. You can't help but to smile when you think of your little sister grimacing when she took her first bite of broccoli. You had to convince her that they were tiny trees and she'd become a giant if she ate them. Before you left home, she admitted that it didn't work but she knew you were trying so she kept eating them even if she still didn't like them. Hearing that almost made you break down in tears.

You oil up the pan and turn to grab the broccoli when you run right into Tao.

"You have got to start warning me when you enter a room dude, this is going to keep happening if you don't," you laugh.

Tao chuckles and holds your arm, "I'll try to remember that for next time. How are your wounds?"

"Itchy," you shrug, "But manageable. How about you? How are you feeling?"

"I'm...," He pauses and sighs. "Tired, tired and drained. All I want to do is bury myself in a pile of blankets and pillows and pretend that the rest of the world doesn't exist for a while."

You want to laugh because you've been there, and you feel like this isn't the first time Tao has felt like this but it's the first time he's expressed it.

"Well how about we do just that after dinner ok? I could do with wrapping myself up in that fluffy green blanket like a lettuce wrap," you giggle.

Tao gives you a soft smile and nods, "Sounds like a plan."

His hand roves up from your forearm and to your shoulder, your heart pounding a mile a minute until his nose crinkles and he nearly shoves you away as he picks up the smoking oiled pan off the stove top.

You try to apologize but Tao stops you saying it's his fault he distracted you. He offers to help with the last bit of dinner but you stubbornly decline and banish him to the barstools.

The chicken bake finishes just as you toss the broccoli into the newly oiled pan and you hush up Tao when he offers to help again.

"Can't make you a thank you dinner if you keep trying to help now can I?" you poke at him.

"Wait, what do you mean?" he asks, almost shocked.

"I thought I'd make you something from my world as a thank you... Like we're always cooking stuff from the little book you made me or stuff based on that so I thought I'd try something different...," you feel your heart sinking a bit at how silly you sound.

You should have asked instead of jumping into this, should have double checked and now you're probably just cooking for yourself because he probably won't want t-

"I can't wait to try it then," he says.

You look up, realizing that you had been looking down at the broccoli and were probably about to salt it with your tears.

"It's nothing fancy, just a chicken bake my older brother used to make for me when I was a kid," you smile.

He smiles back and yawns looking more tired than usual, "Like I said, I can't wait to try it."

You feel your cheeks heat and your heart flutter but it doesn't last long as you mentally dunk yourself into cold water.

Just a friend, just a friend...

Shaking yourself out of your girly lovey dove self you focus on finishing dinner. As simple as it is you want to make it especially presentable. You give Tao two chicken breasts and a good helping of carrots, potatoes and broccoli. You wanted to serve dinner rolls with it but you had polished them off a couple nights ago.

Tao is unable to stay seated much longer and takes the plates to the one place you'd thought they'd be forbidden from entering, the nest room. Though not without trays which he asks you to bring. You grab them along with some bottles of water and the dessert Jes had brought earlier from the diner.

Tao has you set the trays and things down at the doorway so you can hold the plates. You watch with bated breath as his claw slowly slices through the air, dragging golden glowing ruins with it. The room shifts and the nest room transforms into something akin to a magical pillow fort. The plates you're holding float out of your hands and the trays fly up to support them.

You look down for the dessert and waters but they had already transported to Tao's hands. He smiles again and gestures for you to follow him into the pillow fort.

He plops down onto a beanbag that you had no idea was even in the room and the tray lands gracefully on his lap. You follow suit and snuggle up into a pile of pillows with your tray landing next to you.

"I gotta say Tao, had I known you as a kid I would have invited you over to build pillow forts and hang out because this is fucking nice," you joke.

Tao doesn't say anything because all of his focus and attention went straight into the dinner you had made. Though he's tired, his eyes turn solid black as he rips into the chicken like a beast. It's no feeding frenzy like he did at your grandmother's house, no he still seems conscience.

You take his silence and focus on the meal as a complement and tuck into your on plate. As you eat you realize that it's still not quite like your brother's.

Guess I'll have to hunt him down and shake that recipe out of him one of these days.

You're halfway down eating when you feel Tao snuggling up to you. You glance over at him, his eyes still all black.

"If you're still fully aware in there let me finish eating dude," you tell him.

Tao grunts which you suppose is a good sign as he slinks down and lays next to you. You stab at your food and eat as slowly as possible hoping that Tao will just pass out while waiting for you.

You're not against platonic cuddling or whatever sharky merfolk due to stay warm, but you need some distance. You need to be a little colder until you've sorted your feelings out.

He's been so good to you, kind and caring that it hurts more and more as the days pass and you haven't even officially moved in yet. You keep things as professional as you can but he keeps doing things like buying you snacks and little gifts like candles and bubble bath stuff.

It drives you absolutely crazy because you know this isn't going to last, that even though you'll still be shoal mates and all, you won't be anything more than just that.

You finish eating and check to see if Tao had passed out. Once you're certain he's asleep you clean up the pillow fort and take everything to the kitchen as quietly as possible. You shake your head and almost cry as you laugh about hanging out with Tao in a pillow fort.

If you weren't in love with him you'd probably have a blast. You'd probably try to wake his ass up and try to teach him some games the both of you could play.

But you're in love with him and he's tired. You're tired too.

You had allowed yourself to laze about while physically healing but mentally and emotionally you still feel like your wounds are wide open and bleeding all over the place.

Tip toeing back to the nest room, you quickly swipe the fluffy green blanket and a couple pillows to take back to the living room. You toss yourself onto the leather loveseat and curl into a ball before passing out.

~~~~~~

Tao:

My eyes feel crusted and practically glued together when I wake up. I'm cold even though I'm wrapped up in a heavy blanket. I reach out to get a feel of my surroundings when my memories of last night start flooding in. I snap up and and furiously wipe my eyes till I can open them.

The nest room is as I remembered, magicked into a cave of pillows and blankets but absent of a certain someone. I quickly untangle myself from the blankets and nearly trip as I make my way out of the room.

I search the nearby rooms to check for her before heading to the kitchen. My heart sinks when I peer into the living room and find her curled up on the couch. I quietly pad my way over to her and I fall to my knees when I see notice the tears stained on her face and the puffiness of her eyes.

Had she spent the entire night out here alone crying her eyes out?

I grab a fistful of my hair as I try to wrack my brain for anything I might have done to upset her. I start to worry if I offended her with the way that I ate last night, I did try my best to suppress my instincts. I know that going into a feeding frenzy can disgust humans but she's been fine with it before.

My heart starts racing and I can hardly breathe as I continue to spiral into a state of panic. I'm obviously not quiet about it because she stirs then shoots straight up. I hear her worrying over me, her warm hands cupping my cheek so gently. Without think I hold her hand in place as if I'm afraid this will be the last time she touches me.

Her thumb soothes short lines near my eye and I feel myself slowly calming down to the point that I almost doze off again. She keeps talking but it's muffled. She tries to pull her hand away then and I snap out of whatever trance I was in.

"Tao, you need to go in the tank dammit! You're dry as a bone!" she yells at me.

It takes a moment for my mind and body to sync up and that's when I realize the severe discomfort my skin is in. Not just my skin but my mouth feels sticky and my gills are on fire. I stumble as I stand, no longer operating on anxious energy. It's so difficult to move, to breathe in this state.

I haven't neglected myself like this in ages and now I'm doing it in front of her. For a moment I think she might scold me, rage at how stupid I was for not taking better care of myself until I feel her small hand at the mid of my back.

Slowly she helps me to the hatch, my breathing becoming more and more labored with each step. My gills feel stuck and itchy to the point of sheer madness. I try my best not to scratch at them in fear of them becoming raw.

She sits me down on one of the benches and helps me out of my shirt. For a moment I think that it's kind of her to help me out like this until I remember that I'm wearing pants too.

In a sudden bout of panic I shoot up and kick the hatch open. I hear her talking but not a single word is registering. I quickly start stripping my pants off and before she can see anything I try to dive into my tank but trip over my own feet. I nearly miss the edge when I hit the water and thank the goddesses I made it before I feel unconscious.

There's a weight on my shoulder, a stinging pain too. I suppose I did hit myself but not as bad. I peel open my eyes in horror when I see my shoal mate's limp body slowly floating away from me with blood trailing from her head.

~~~~~~

You could see Tao struggling and you tried to stop him before he hurt himself, instead you ended up bonking your fucking head on the edge of the hatch. It stings like a bitch from the saltwater so you must have sliced it on impact.

But you quickly shove that though from your mind because you're underwater and you're breathing somehow. Memories flood back and you recall holding onto to his shoulder for dear life and Tao pulling you in and how his mouth opened yours up so he could breathe for you. He said something and you nodded before passing out again. He most likely cast a spell to allow you to breathe under water then.

You slowly open your eyes but there's not much to behold. The tank is dark save for the light near the surface. You feel around yourself and notice something smooth nearby. You give it a good poke a guess by the texture and smooshiness of it that it's Tao's tail. Suddenly you're being pulled against him, his nose nuzzling against your ear and his claws rest gently against your bare skin.

"You scared me half to death," he groans, his voice hoarse.

"Ditto dude, you were having a full blown panic attack. What happened?" you ask as bubbles exit your mouth. You have a good idea based on how he's responded to anything you do in the past but it doesn't hurt to check.

Tao's claws twitch and he hums, "I was worried that I had offended you somehow. When I awoke, you were not in the nest."

"You didn't do anything wrong Tao, I just... I needed some space. That and uhh...," You pause, knowing it's now or never and decide to rip it off like a band aid. "You don't have to keep up the fake dating act when we're alone. I mean whenever you find your mate or something I think you'll do good."

You continue to praise him and how he'll make someone super happy one of these days while doing your damndest to mask the ache in your heart. You slip up though and your voice cracks but you laugh it off or at least try to.

The slip doesn't go unnoticed and Tao pulls you into his arms again, crushing you against his body. You're stiff yet somehow you're trembling as he cradles your head and gently kisses your cheek. He doesn't say anything really but you do hear him purr. It's a low thrumming sound and it's oddly soothing.

"We were supposed to relax and pretend as if the world did not exist in the nest room. I ruined that by allowing my instincts to take over again," He says remorsefully.

"No you didn't Tao, I just... I needed space and... you've been great, maybe too great. It just feels wrong somehow to keep up the fake dating act twenty four seven. It's been messing with my head so much so that, I don't know... I just think we should tone it down and just be friends when no one is looking," you bury your face against his chest and sigh.

Tao taps his claws against the back of your head as his purring somehow intensifies, "Then how has it been messing with your head? Did I do something to overstep any boundaries?"

It's a genuine question, you know it is but it irritates you because it's digging so close to the truth, "You haven't overstepped anything, if anyone did that would be me. You've been nothing but kind and respectful and all that and it's been making me think how great it would be if there was someone who could treat me like you do but they actually loved me."

That last part stings your soul because you don't want just anybody, you want Tao.

Without thinking you keep blubbering on, your emotions taking charge now, "And then I started thinking how nice it would be if I was your mate, not just shoal mate, but that'd never happen. So I just kept telling myself we're friends and that you'll eventually find your fated mate and I'll be tossed aside. So I've been trying my best to shut those feelings off, to put some distance between us but somehow someway we keep coming into contact with each other."

At this point your laughing, possibly crying but it's too hard to tell since you're still underwater. Tao holds you even tighter, pulling you up until your chin rests on his shoulder.

"I pray to the goddesses every night that I never meet my fated mate or that I will have the strength to reject her if we do meet," he admits.

"Why would you do that?" you ask with a broken voice.

"Because I want to choose my mate and fated mates among merfolk are rare anyways. I came to this world for a new life, I can't hold onto old traditions and wishful thinking," he answers, his claws once again tapping the back of your head.

"Did you decide this because you've already chose someone?" The question slips and Tao's fingers still against you.

His purring is so loud now and his heartbeat is thrumming against it. He doesn't say anything for a minute but then nods, "Yes, I suppose I have."

You go limp in his hold for a second before looking up at him. His golden eyes glow in the darkness and his hair moves in waves around his head like an inky crown. He looks more feral at this moment than he does when his instincts kick in. For a moment you're terrified of the question fighting its way out but when he touches your arm oh so gently is just flies out.

"Who is it? Who did you chose?"