beausprouts

[beausprouts]

what? oh sweetheart no, you're not weirding me out at all. you're weirding me in. keep talking, freak

[beausprouts]

knight who is constantly searching for a good and noble king to serve but cannot fucking find one for the life of him so he has to become the good and noble king himself.

and now all these other knights are coming around like "please let me serve you" and like obviously hes going to let them serve him thats the point of being a good and noble king but its also. very annoying. one of you become the good and noble king for once lets trade

[beausprouts]

Everyone who got annoyed at me over the cis woman who couldn't understand a man knowing what experiencing misogyny is like post is proving my point btw.

Everyone who had something to say about "do you want to be seen as a man or not" is proving my exact point that people cannot fully accept the notion of men who are not welcomed into the boys club of cis manhood. The notion of "Man" is entwined inextricably with Power, Control, if I am a man that must mean I wear The Boot because Man means Wearing The Boot. You want me to chose between my sense of self and my lived experiences because to you, a "real man" would not have had my experiences.

You people are incapable of understanding gender as an internal sense of self and not as a magic spell. You fail to progress your feminism past a no boys allowed sign hung on the door of a playhouse. You are deeply fucking unserious and it's frankly embarrassing.

There's a serious problem in progressive spaces wrt seeing people as entire people with flexible experiences and not just identities listed like Pokémon types. Be better.

[beausprouts]

ahhhh so the guilt is NOT supposed to be neverending and haunting and constant and persisting beyond a doubt over even the most menial of things that i would not be upset at someone else for. i understand now.

[beausprouts]

Okay

[beausprouts]

there's been plenty of pushback against youtube's plan to age-check users by using an AI to analyze everyone's watching habits, but amidst that, i spotted this playlist circulating among some teens:

(picture is a reconstruction to protect the kids identity)

interesting! they're trying to trick the AI by watching videos that have a primarily adult viewer demographic? well im a curious fella so naturally i have to take a look-see, and

[beausprouts]

[beausprouts]

I've brought you.. a gift!

[beausprouts]

bigs my eyes

[beausprouts]

Had my suspicions but I have finally confirmed it this morning: The rival Pokémon Go team I have been beefing with, whose gym's total annihilation I have incorporated into my morning routine, is actually a group of local elementary school students

[beausprouts]

love the word “dogmatic.” you’re so single-mindedly obedient that you’re like a little puppy dog about it

[beausprouts]

welcome to the Murdersex zine, a zine celebrating all things sex and murder. but um. we don't want to romanticize it or anything so don't make your submissions too murdersexy. we will do extensive background checks on all applicants and if we decide a past work of yours has too much sexy murder we'll have to remove you, sorry. we have limits, you know, we want a tasteful gory spread you could put on your coffee table, and having the Wrong people in it would kill the vibe (and we condemn all killing! wholeheartedly!)

[beausprouts]

so... these guys

[beausprouts]

too many catnip mice, too little time.

[beausprouts]

what i reaallyyy love about robot sex is that they don’t even need those. but it’s fun and it feels good so their manufacturers gave them anyway

[beausprouts]

So sorry to keep twitter posting but this had me dead