#they blame me for it not being finished but i can't read so who's really to blame
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sgrumby · 2 years ago
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“How can we breathe?”
“Force field,” Barry replies, his legs dangling over the rim of the TARDIS. “Keeps the bad guys out and the oxygen in. I, uh, wouldn’t be able to answer the phone without it.” He reaches up sheepishly and pops open the hatch on the door to reveal a rotary phone.
Lup gives him a look that he’s beginning to realise means she thinks he’s being tremendously stupid. “Why couldn’t you wire it in to the console? Or install a door so it opens from the inside, even?”
“Hey, have you seen that?” He changes the subject with his usual tact. “Look, wow, supernova.”
She grins and sits down next to him, kicking her feet in the vacuum of space. “It is pretty.”
“I should think so,” he grumbles. “Take a girl halfway across the universe and a million years back in time and all she can do is criticise my phone.”
“I’m just saying, I thought the Time Lords would’ve invented better phones! It’s rotary, Barry, it’s from the sixties!”
“It’s retro,” he insists. “It fits the police box aesthetic. Did you miss where it says PUBLIC CALL on the top?”
“Did you miss where it says PULL TO OPEN?”
“Shut up.”
“Why is it a police box, though?” She asks. “That seems… very sixties. You’d be right at home with my gran.”
“Chameleon circuit got stuck,” he says. “She’s designed to change her outside to blend in. I could fix it but, honestly, I like the blue. Plus, uh, it used to be real hard to find the door on a rock or a tree or - if there was nothing else around sometimes she’d materialise as a blade of grass, or whatever, and then I couldn’t even get out. I’m not sure if she was messing with me, or if she was designed to do that, or - it’s just easier this way.”
“It’s nice, actually,” she says. “Comforting, somehow. It feels sturdy. I can’t imagine it as a rock or a tree.”
He pats the floor next to him, and the engines go dwummmm. “She used to be different inside, too. All white and sterile. She had these big roundels - it was really weird. I don’t know who designed the UI, but it wasn’t good. As soon as I figured out how to redecorate I got on it.”
“You designed the coral?” Lup hadn’t really questioned the organic-looking arches and pillars. They’d been low on her list of priorities when she’d found herself in a time machine, and then the question had just fallen by the wayside.
“Well, I mean, I gave her a brief. I wanted it to feel more comfy, you know? This is my home, not a science lab. Well, it’s a lab, a little bit, but it’s - you know what I mean.”
“Wait, wait, gave her a brief?” Lup looks back in at the console, with its mess of wires and mismatched switches and knobs. She’d assumed that was the result of a few decades of Barry conducting haphazard repairs, but now he mentions it, they do look a little like some kind of sophisticated nervous system. “How sentient is this ship, exactly?”
Barry pulls a face, hesitates, and shrugs. “I dunno.”
“What!”
“Well, like, I told you that she’s soulbound, so she’s intelligent to some extent. I have a degree of control over the interior, and - I always kind of feel like she is. Like, I can do everything right on the console, and I’ll find myself halfway across the universe from where I asked her to go.”
“That’s a broken satnav, Barry, not sentience.”
“But it’s always where I need to go,” he elaborates. “Like, there’ll be someone who needs help, or a distress call, or something neat to go and see. Like this! This supernova. I’ve never been here before, and I basically just told the TARDIS that I wanted to show you something ro - something cool.”
He blushes at his slip, but Lup’s wrapped up in her thoughts.
“So, what, you just said “make me something comfy” and she made big coral pillars?”
“It’s a little more elaborate than that, but yeah, pretty much. I don’t know either, really. She’s… eccentric.”
“And the car seats?”
Barry shrugs again. “No idea. I needed somewhere to sit, that’s what I got.”
Lup hums, unhappily. “Can she see us? Feel us? I don’t like the idea that we’re walking around inside a sentient being.”
“I don’t think she minds. She can lock you out, if she likes. One regeneration I got a haircut she didn’t like and she wouldn’t let me in til it grew out. I was trapped on Gorvon Six for months.” The engine makes another dwummm noise, and Barry scowls. “It’s not funny!”
Lup can’t help but laugh at the expression on his face. “The more I learn the more I realise who’s in charge here.”
“I’m in charge!” He protests. “I’m a Time Lord! You know they used to grow TARDISes like bonsai? In little pots?”
“Oh, you’re getting pushed around by a bonsai?”
“I’m gonna go find Taako,” Barry grumbles. “Maybe he’ll be polite and respectful.”
Lup gives him a look.
“Okay, yeah, fine,” he concedes.
She laughs again and turns back to the star, gleaming brilliantly before them. The light plays across her face, reddy-orange, making her hair seem to glow and her eyes seem to sparkle.
Barry’s seen beauty in the universe. He’s seen nebulae, the births of stars, watched the sunrise on Heloyus, which orbits in a complex path between thirty different suns and, once every ten thousand years, sees a simultaneous thirty-sun sunrise. And yet, somehow, watching Lup…
“Want to grab pizza?” He offers.
“Shit, yes,” she grins. “Alien pizza?”
“Future pizza,” he counteroffers, jumping up from the floor of the TARDIS. “November 18th, 2045. The restaurant opened that day and burned down the next, but it’s the best pizza I’ve ever had. I pretty much singlehandedly earned them their money back, cos I keep parking the TARDIS in different places and ordering takeaway. You should see the look on the delivery guy’s face every time he sees me and my enormous blue box in a different area of London, all on one night.” He holds a hand out to help her up, and she takes it gladly.
“How do you order takeaway! You don’t have an address!”
“I just tell them the street,” he says. “It’s not like there’s a lot of blue boxes lying around.”
She considers that for a second. “Okay, yeah, that’s fair, I guess. What’s your order? Hawaiian?”
He narrows his eyes, hands frozen above the console. “How did you know that?”
“Shot in the dark. You seem like you’d go nuts for pineapple on pizza, is all.”
“What does that mean?”
“Alien tastebuds,” she says with a shrug. “I’ll grab Taako.”
“So rude,” he murmurs, and flips a switch on the console, setting the rotors whirring once again as Lup skips out of the room.
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wintrwinchestr · 3 months ago
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strangers | part 1
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summary: following in the footsteps of a girl you once knew, you decide to up and leave home one morning without looking back. when you find yourself to be tired, hungry, and alone in the middle of nowhere, you're thankful when a kind stranger offers you a ride, a warm meal, and a place to sleep for the night. he only tells you about himself in bits and pieces, but he seems trustworthy enough, and what you don't know can't hurt you, right?
!!PLEASE READ WARNINGS, THIS IS A VERY DARK FIC!!
I've tried to label this fic as detailed and as boldly as possible. I will not be held responsible or bullied off the internet if you choose to read this potentially upsetting/triggering work of fiction anyway.
warnings: joel miller x f!reader, 18+, smut, age gap (reader is college-aged, joel is mid-50s), no outbreak au, serial killer!joel, dark!joel, talk of death/murder and blood, mommy & daddy issues, brief talk of domestic violence, lying/gaslighting, manipulation, f-receiving non-con somnophilia (no sex, but groping, fingering, dry humping, kissing, and choking), degrading language toward victims, pet names (baby, darlin', sweetheart), some joel pov, no ellie/sarah but tommy has an unnamed daughter, somewhat inspired by "strangers" by ethel cain, takes place in illinois/ohio/indiana, vaguely set in the 70s/80s, this part is mostly introduction/storytelling/yapping, please respectfully let me know if i missed anything and i will rectify the tags
word count: 9.8k
a/n: i started this as a oneshot way back in november, and then it sat abandoned for a very long time. thank you to my lovely friends @polaroidpascal and @chippedowlmug for encouraging me to finish it, and also bestie kiers who never hesitates to match my freak. also thank you to the many writers who made me feel inspired to write something dark and not give a fuck what people think about it. i hope you enjoy this joel he's a freak and i love him and if you say anything mean about him i'll send him after you <3
divider by @saradika
series masterlist/moodboard
read this chapter on ao3
part 2
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Ruby Carpenter.
You had spent all day trying to remember her name without really knowing why. Maybe it’s because as the sun sets on what would be the first day of your junior year at the nearby state school, you wonder if she ever made it to one of the fancy ivy leagues she had always aspired to attend. You wonder if she’s even still alive.
Ruby had disappeared a few years ago now, the summer after your senior year of high school. For nearly a year afterwards, her missing posters remained stapled onto every telephone pole and stuck onto every store window around town, until the paper began to disintegrate and the ink began to fade. In that time, you couldn’t even make a quick run to the grocery store without being confronted by dozens of replicas of her yearbook photo printed onto the sides of all the milk cartons. Despite all of the efforts to find her, including several search parties and a decent amount of statewide media coverage, everyone had just stopped looking for her, eventually. Even the police. Even her parents.
It was decided that she had probably just run away, and you can’t entirely blame her, but you can’t imagine why she would, either. You remember her perfect head of blonde ringlet curls that shone a yellow gold in the sun, and her bright blue eyes that turned fiery in her more passionate moments during classroom debates. She had every boy in your grade wrapped around her finger, was the teacher’s pet in every class, and it wasn’t even a question whether she would win prom queen your senior year. She was always sweet to you, always complimented your outfits or your makeup or your art projects with a genuine lilt in her voice and a kind smile, so you could never bring yourself to hate her even though it would’ve been so easy to. You figured she was going to cure cancer or become the president after you had all graduated, which is why you never really stopped wondering whatever happened to her that summer. She was beautiful, with boundless potential and a bright future ahead of her, why would she have just given it all up?
Everyone around town knew Ruby, or at least it seemed that way. But maybe nobody ever really knew her as well as they thought. Maybe she’d had a secret boyfriend all that time who whisked her away that summer, maybe she had decided to try drugs and fell down a rabbit hole that she couldn’t claw her way out of, maybe she had finally figured out that the only thing this town would ever be good for is holding people back. Maybe she did just wake up one day and decide to run without ever looking behind her.
Maybe you should do the same.
With your dad long gone now and your step-father doing a piss poor job of filling in the hole he left, following in Ruby’s footsteps has sounded like a better idea with each passing day. Rob isn’t even really your step-father, anyway, just your mom’s sorry fucking excuse for a boyfriend. The guy’s already been married upwards of three times before, why try for another one? He’s a lazy son of a bitch who can’t hold down a job at a fast food joint for more than a couple of weeks at a time, who sleeps every second of the day that he’s not chugging through a six pack, and who leaves marks on your mother uglier than his fucking face. 
She doesn’t deserve to be treated that way, of course, but it’s not like she’s winning the “mom of the year” award any time soon, either. She’s never even been nominated. She’s forgotten just about every one of your birthdays, been the reason you’ve never had any friends come over, and in her most recent offense, blew all the savings you had put away for your last two years of college. Which is why you’re not spending tonight celebrating being one year closer to at least having an official-looking piece of paper to show for yourself. Instead, you’re using the rattling of your bedroom window unit and the booming bass of your radio to drown out yet another drunken screaming match between your mother and the guy she lets live in your house now, watching the world outside pass you by and knowing that if you don’t do anything about it now, you’ll never make it out of here. You’re thinking about Ruby Carpenter, hoping she found somewhere greener and more promising and was able to make something of herself, far away from here. And you’re thinking that this rusted orange sunset is the last one you’ll ever see from your bedroom window.
It’s decided, then. You’re leaving, first thing tomorrow.
You’ve only gotten a few hours of sleep by the time your alarm clock chimes to life at five o’clock on the dot. You’re quick to silence the shrill beeping with a swift swat of your hand, careful not to wake anyone else in the house. The sun has just barely begun to stream in through the blinds of your bedroom window, but it illuminates the room just enough for your eyes to land on the backpack you had stuffed full of a few changes of clothes last night, waiting for you by the door. 
You don’t waste any time stripping off your pajamas and pulling on just about the only clothes left in your room that aren’t in your bag. You’ve got your teeth brushed, face washed, and hair tamed in all of about ten minutes, too anxious to spend even one more unnecessary second in this house. You swing your backpack over your shoulder, pull your bedroom door open at just the right speed so that the hinges don’t squeak too loud, and tiptoe delicately down the stairs, careful to avoid the creaky floorboards that you know like the back of your hand—the one three steps from the top, the one at the landing about halfway down, and the very bottom one.
You land softly when you leap over that tattletale bottom step, successful in the most difficult part of your escape plan so far. Rob is passed out on the living room couch in typical fashion, his mouth full of crooked teeth hanging open as his grating snores permeate the calm morning air. He’s still got a death grip around an empty beer can, even in his sleep, and your mother will likely be the one to toss it into the trash for him, useless fucker that he is. You aren’t going to miss either of them, and you imagine they’ll just skip trying to replicate the first half of the aftermath of Ruby’s disappearance altogether—no posters, no search parties, no police. You’ll just be gone, one less mouth for your mother to feed. Though, you’d been mostly feeding yourself since you were tall enough to slide a couple of bills across the counter at the corner store down the street, anyway. You’re ready to disappear, the same as candle wax when it burns, the same as the end of a rainbow, the same as Ruby Carpenter.
You don’t bother looking back when you shut the door behind you, content to leave it all behind just as the sun begins to rise and set the sky ablaze. By the time it sets again tonight, you hope to be in a different county, in a different state, anywhere that isn’t here. The rest, you’ll just have to figure out when you get there, wherever “there” may be.
You had only realized about an hour ago that you’d forgotten your cheap digital watch in the drawer of your bedside table, where it’s laid unused for the past couple of months, because who needs to tell time during the summer? You never had anywhere to be, never had to get to class or turn in a paper by a certain time, so it’s just been collecting dust since you had unclipped it from your wrist on the last day of spring semester. It sure would have come in handy right about now, when you have no fucking clue what time it is. The sun had disappeared behind the hills several mile markers back, so it must be… eight o’clock? Ten o’clock? Fucking midnight? You have no idea. What you do know is that you’re exhausted, hungry, and your feet hurt like hell. You aren’t really sure what you expected, the reality only just now setting in that you don’t even have ten bucks to your name anymore, thanks to your narcissist of a mother. The crumpled up bills you do have in your pocket are hardly enough for a goddamn sandwich, let alone a motel room. The cool night breeze raises goosebumps on your skin, and you swear you can see your fucking breath, even in the middle of August. You wrap your arms around yourself just as tears begin to prick at your waterlines, and you let them fall as you collapse onto the scratchy patch of dead grass on the side of the freeway, not a park bench or a bus stop or even a gas station in sight for God knows how many more miles.
You sit cross-legged, elbows propped up on your knees so that your hands can support your weary head, the skin of your palms becoming slippery with salty tears as your crying just doesn’t seem to stop. The road you’ve found yourself on seems relatively low-trafficked, the heaving sounds of your sobs accompanied by more cricket chirps and rustling wheat than rumbling tires. But a few high beams do streak across your vision every once in a while, coloring the backs of your eyelids a flaming scarlet.
After several minutes, your tears seem to dry up on their own, your body likely too dehydrated now to produce any more. You wipe the moisture from under your eyes with the back of your hand, sniffling as you gnaw at the skin of your bottom lip and debate if you should just turn back now, give up on your stupid little plan (or lack thereof) and just call the whole thing a loss, pretend it never even happened. Your mother and Rob won’t have even noticed you’d left.
Just as you pull yourself back up to your feet, set on at least finding somewhere that isn’t the hard ground to sleep on tonight before you make your way back home tomorrow, the warm headlights of an old pickup truck are shining bright in your eyes. You put your arm up to block them as the truck slowly squeals to a halt in front of where you’re standing, and you squint your eyes at the driver as your vision adjusts.
“You need a ride, sweetheart?” A man asks in a gravelly voice, and you can still hardly make out what he looks like. Based on the southern accent you pick up on, he doesn’t sound like he’s from around here. 
“N-no, thank you. I’m okay,” you respond shakily, taking a nervous step back from the stranger and his rusted pickup.
“You sure? Looked like you were cryin’ over here, like you might be lost or somethin’.”
“‘M not lost, I know where I’m going.”
“Oh yeah? Where’s that?”
Shit. 
You take a guess.
“Um… the motel down the road,” you reply, tilting your head in the direction you had been walking in.
“There ain’t a motel down there, sweetheart. Ain’t nothin’ in either direction for miles, ‘s all just farmland out here. Reckon you’ve already figured that out, though.”
You pause, unsure of what your next move should be. He knows you’re lying, knows you’re alone with no fucking idea where you are or where you’re going. You could run, but even that shitty truck of his could catch up to you in a matter of seconds. You take another step back, swiveling your head around to look up and down the road as you try to figure your best way out of this.
“Just lemme give you a ride somewhere, darlin’. There’s a diner just off the exit, ‘bout twenty miles up ahead. Could take you that far, at least, get you somethin’ to eat,” he offers. A warm meal does sound pretty good right now, and you suppose you aren’t exactly in a position to refuse his help.
You think on it for a second. “What’s it called? The diner.”
The stranger huffs. “Moody’s.”
“What do they have?” you challenge.
He sighs. “It’s a fuckin’ diner off the side of the freeway, darlin’. They got greasy food and black coffee, ‘s about all you need.”
You don’t say anything.
Then, after a beat—“They got some kinda sloppy mess they call the Thunder Burger. ‘S got onion rings and shit on it. Ain’t half bad.”
You have to admit, he’s passing your pop quiz with flying colors. His answers have been too quick, too specific for him to be lying to you. There’s a pretty solid chance this diner does exist, and that he’s been there before. The man hasn’t said anything that’s indicated he wants more to do with you than to offer you a ride and some dinner. He’s probably just somebody’s harmless grandfather, anyway, judging by his motheaten flannel and gray-stricken beard you can see now that you’ve approached his truck a few paces closer.
“Okay,” you concede, your stomach growling loudly as the man leans over the bench seat to pop open the passenger side door for you. You shrug off your backpack and climb into the cabin, clicking your seatbelt into place as you situate yourself on the cracked leather seat. 
“All set?” the stranger asks.
“Mhm,” you hum, finally getting a better look at the man you might just owe the rest of your life to after tonight. For being somebody’s grandfather, he’s… kinda handsome. Really fucking handsome, actually, in a rugged sort of way. He’s got warm amber eyes that sparkle even in the dark of night, a kind smile that completely disarms you in an instant, and a splintering scar across the bridge of his nose that somehow only adds to his good looks. You try to suppress your own grin as you look away from him quickly, opting to focus on fidgeting with one of the fraying edges of your denim shorts instead. Even in your peripheral vision, you don’t miss how his eyes shift from your own to the exposed skin of your thighs. He doesn’t say anything, just clears his throat as he shifts gears and steers his truck back onto the road again. 
He lets the next few minutes pass in comfortable silence before asking, “You got a name, sweetheart?”
You tell him, and he flashes another charming smile at you. “I like that, ‘s pretty… Well, I’m Joel. Sure you were wonderin’. Now you ain’t gettin’ a ride from a stranger no more, are ya?”
“Yeah, I guess I’m not,” you giggle, and you’re surprised at how comfortable you feel with him. “So… you’ve been to Moody’s before?”
“Handful of times, yeah. When I’m passin’ through.”
You nod. “So you come up here, like… for work or somethin’?”
Joel chuckles. “Or somethin’. You never even heard of the damn place, so… reckon you don’t find yourself out here very often, do ya?”
“No… ‘M not even really sure where ‘here’ is, to be honest. I just kinda… started walking.”
“Ah… a runaway, then, are ya?” Joel asks, with an appreciated amount of understanding in his tone rather than judgment. “‘M sure your folks are missin’ ya right about now, must have your boyfriend worried sick.”
You scoff at that. “Fuck no. They probably don’t even know I’m gone, won’t even bother trying to come look for me. And I don’t have a boyfriend, so…”
“Damn shame. ‘M sorry about that, sweetheart,” Joel comforts, placing a large calloused hand on your thigh. It makes your breath hitch, but his touch isn’t entirely unwelcome. You let him squeeze once at the plush of your leg before he replaces his hand on the wheel, and your cunt spasms out a little fluttering pulse against the seam of your shorts, despite yourself.
The rest of the drive to Moody’s is relatively quiet, save for the gentle crooning of an old country singer emanating from the cassette player on the dash. The soft singing and steady strumming of a banjo combined with the muffled chugging of the truck’s engine is enough to lull you to sleep, especially after the day you’ve had. You know that just about every mental alarm bell you have should be screaming at you to jump out of the car, to run, that sleeping alone in the dirt would’ve been a better decision than getting into this strange man’s—Joel’s—truck, but you’re too tired to hear them. He smells good, like woodsmoke and pine and cinnamon, and if he wanted to do something awful to you, he probably would’ve done it by now. So you trust him, for now at least, and let your lashes fan out against your cheeks as your head falls back against the cushioned headrest, coaxed into sleep by the lullaby of tires against pavement and fingertips against guitar strings.
You only rouse when you feel the truck come to a stop about half an hour or so later, slowly blinking your eyes open against the bright neon sign that reads “MOODY’S” in bold capital letters. Your jaw stretches wide as a yawn overtakes the muscles, and you hear Joel’s southern drawl replace the one from the cassette as he shuts the engine off.
“Mornin’, sleepyhead. Not too tired to eat somethin’ now, are ya?”
Another unpleasant-sounding rumble from your empty stomach answers for you, loud enough for both of you to hear this time. The air puffing out of the diner’s kitchen smells strongly of fatty bacon and rich coffee, just like Joel had promised you the place would offer. Although the digital clock on the dash read just after 10:30 before you fell asleep, you’ve never craved breakfast quite like you do right now. You absentmindedly lick your lips as you imagine the sweet and savory—and more importantly free—meal that could be waiting for you beyond that blinding beacon of a sign.
“Well, alright then. Let’s get some food in ya before you keel over, hm?” Joel says as he exits the truck, landing on his feet in the dirt parking lot with a soft groan. He waits by the hood for you to meet up with him, and you walk up the couple of steps to the entrance together. He holds the door open for you, and you offer him a shy ‘thank you’, to which he responds with a soft spoken ‘welcome, sweetheart’. You stand shyly behind his broad form as he asks the hostess for a table for two, and she leads you to a green leather booth tucked into the corner of the diner. She hands each of you a sticky laminated menu, the pages a charming mess of clashing colors and faded pictures and retro-looking fonts, then departs with a promise that your waitress will bring the two of you some water as you take your time deciding on what you might like. 
You light up upon reading that Moody’s serves breakfast all day, and that they can make you exactly what you were hoping for—a stack of chocolate chip pancakes with sides of bacon and hashbrowns. You can’t help but smile to yourself as you wiggle in your seat, excitedly anticipating the waitress to come back around so you can order.
“Whatcha so excited about over there?” Joel asks, eyeing you from across the table as he glances up from his own menu.
“Nothin’, I was just hoping I could get some pancakes, and they have ‘em on the menu,” you explain giddily. “I’ll probably get some coffee, too, really complete the whole ‘breakfast for dinner’ thing.”
Joel huffs through his nose. “Decaf, I hope. ‘S the middle of the goddamn night, sweetheart. Gonna be bouncin’ off the walls in the room later, hardly get any sleep.”
He’s right, you suppose. But wait—“What room?”
Joel shrugs casually. “There’s a decent motel another exit or two down, figured they could probably get us a couple o’ beds for the night. But, ‘m sorry, shouldn’t have assumed—”
“No! No, it’s okay.”
Is it? You only met the man less than an hour ago, and you already agreed to let him give you a ride before you even knew his name. You suppose you hadn’t really thought about what would happen after he bought you dinner, but not thinking ahead seems to have been a theme today, hasn’t it? You remind yourself that he’s only been kind and respectful to you so far, save for that placement of his hand on your upper thigh soon after he picked you up. But that could’ve just been a friendly, paternal gesture, right? And he said a couple of beds, when he mentioned the motel, which seemed to imply that he plans on the two of you sleeping in separate beds, maybe even separate rooms. You’ve found yourself having to make yet another somewhat reckless decision tonight, but one that would be in your best interest to say ‘yes’ to, at this point. What other option would you have if you declined his offer?
“Don’t really have anywhere else to go, so… yeah, okay. Motel sounds good. And decaf it is, I guess.”
Joel’s apologetic expression quickly morphs into a satisfied smirk. “Good girl,” he praises. You like how the words sound coated in his thick drawl, even though you probably shouldn’t. You shift where you sit as that familiar fluttering sensation returns to the seat of your panties, just for a moment. You’re grateful that the waitress arrives at the booth not a second later, cheerily introducing herself as she sets down a glass of water for each of you. When she asks if you’re ready to order, Joel gestures to you as if to say ‘ladies first’, and you politely prattle off your request. You make sure to emphasize that you’d like your coffee decaf, and ask if she could please bring some more of the little cups of vanilla creamer to the table. “Not a problem, honey,” she replies, and Joel winks at you as she asks what she can get for him. He orders the Thunder Burger he had told you about earlier, and a black coffee, which he doesn’t request to be decaf. The waitress leaves the two of you alone again with an ‘I’ll have that right out for ya,’ and you let your eyes follow the calming baby blue color of her dress as she glides her way back to the kitchen. When she disappears around the corner of the bar, you take the opportunity to study Moody’s other patrons. There isn’t another young person in sight, mostly just men around Joel’s age with similarly heavy bags under their eyes, likely truck drivers indulging in their first hot meal of the day within the diner’s comforting wood-paneled walls. You wonder if that’s how Joel knows about this place, because he “passes through” this area on long hauls across the midwest. You open your mouth to ask him if your assumption is correct, but he cuts you off before you can say anything.
“I gotta admit, sweetheart, I’m curious… The hell was a pretty thing like you doin’ out in the middle of goddamn nowhere tonight? I mean, I know you’re a runaway ‘n all, but… shouldn’t you be one o’ those college party girls or somethin’? ‘M sure you got plenty of friends wonderin’ where you are.”
You sigh, shaking your head as you distractedly pick at a splintered piece of wood at the edge of the table.
“I was in college. Was supposed to be going back again this year, but… my mom spent all the fucking savings I had left for the rest of it on fixing up her dumb boyfriend’s car. It’s just been sitting in the fucking lawn all summer, sure as hell not being used for something useful like going to the job he doesn’t have. That bastard…” You say the last part under your breath through gritted teeth.
“Shit… Tha’s a tough deal, baby, ‘m real sorry to hear that,” Joel comforts. “But y’know, everybody’s got mommy ‘n daddy issues, don’t mean you just up and start walkin’ all by your lonesome, not even have any idea where you’re goin’.”
“Well, it wasn’t just that. There was… nevermind, it’s stupid.” You slump into the cushioned booth, silently cursing yourself for even bringing it up.
“What is it?” Joel pushes, sitting up straighter to show you that he wants to listen, wants to get to know you. And God dammit, he might be the first person you’ve met in a long time who actually seems to care about what you have to say, as strange as it is. You flick your eyes up to his face, and he’s wearing a sincere gaze that convinces you to continue.
“There was this girl I went to high school with. She disappeared a couple of years ago, nobody ever found out what happened to her. People figured she probably just ran away, and I thought… I dunno. That maybe she had the right idea, leaving that place behind. I always held onto this hope that maybe she was still out there somewhere actually doing something with her life, that maybe she just changed her name or something and disappeared on purpose.” You pause. “I guess I just thought I might be able to do the same, if I left.”
“I see…” Joel muses sympathetically. “Maybe I oughta give you a lil’ more credit, then. Must’a been tough losin’ a friend like that, not knowin’ where she ended up.”
“I mean, Ruby wasn’t really my friend. She just—”
“Hang on. Ruby, you said?” Joel interrupts, his eyes suddenly looking a little wild.
“...Yeah. Her name was Ruby. Ruby Carpenter.”
Fuck.
Joel has to adjust himself under the table, his dick now hardening uncomfortably in his jeans at just the mention of her name. He remembers Ruby, remembers chuckling to himself when he realized the irony of her name matching the color of her blood, remembers watching the news coverage of her disappearance in this very same diner, those handful of years ago. She was a sweet thing, he remembers this, too. It was a shame she had ended up being such a fighter, that she had to get put down the way she did. But she shouldn’t have thrown that fucking rock at his face, called him a sick fuck and a freak as she made her pitiful little escape attempt. Joel is lucky that all he came away from it with is that ugly little scar that mars the bridge of his nose. He can’t say the same for her.
“Why? You heard her name before?” You ask him, an unfortunate little twinkle of hope in your eyes.
“Maybe.” Yes. “Sounds a lil’ familiar, might remember hearin’ about it on the news or somethin’.”
That goddamn news coverage sure as hell taught him a lesson. Joel had spent months trying to keep the cops off his fucking tail after he had dumped her body on some forgettable patch of land behind an old decaying barn. He had even gotten pulled in for a fucking interview at the station in what he now presumes to be your hometown, where they had questioned him for an hour or so about her disappearance. He still isn’t sure how he talked his way out of that one. Ruby might not have been good for much else, other than pissing him the hell off with all of her pathetic crying and begging to just please, please let me go back home, but she did help him perfect his craft, he can give her that much. It’s because of her that Joel makes certain now that any girl he picks up doesn’t have anybody who will miss her or plaster her face on every local channel or send out goddamn search parties to find her. Girls like you.
You’re just so perfect, it would be so fucking easy for him to make you disappear for good, it’s almost comical. It had hardly taken any convincing at all to get you to climb into his truck, had taken even less to get you to agree to go to some seedy ass motel with him that might not even exist, for all you know. It does, but you didn’t even try to test him about it this time, just put all of your trust in him like a stray puppy would to the first person to pick it up off the street. That is just about what you are, he supposes. So far, you seem like the perfect candidate to become his little captive pet. If you keep it up, maybe you won’t meet the same fate as the rest of them. He’d told himself he’d be done after the last one, anyway, his body too old and achy and slow now to chase after the ones who put up a little more fight, like she had. She’d nearly escaped, made it a decent way through the woods and almost reached the main road before tripping on an exposed root and snapping her ankle. He remembers how weak and scared she’d looked before he’d used his knife to put her out of her misery, and it makes his dick twitch. Joel doesn’t plan on snuffing you out, not right now at least, since you haven’t given him a reason to. But his fingers still twitch where they rest on the table, moving out of instinct as he can’t help but imagine what they’d look like wrapped so tightly around your little throat. Would you cry? Would you beg? Would you pray? Would he have to glide his blade across your vocal chords just to get you to stop screaming so fucking loud? He wonders.
“Oh… Was that one of the times you were just ‘passin’ through’ for whatever reason you haven’t told me yet?”
Joel hadn’t realized that his eyes had been unfocused for so long, or that he’d been holding his breath, or that his hand had been squeezing his glass of water so hard he’s glad it hadn’t shattered. The airy sound of your voice brings him back to reality, and he huffs a light chuckle as he fixes his face into a more pleasant expression. 
“Yeah, ‘spose it was.” 
You roll your eyes at him playfully. “Come on, Joel. I just told you, like, my whole sob story. I feel like I deserve to know at least one thing about you now.”
You have a point.
He gives in. “Fine. I got a brother, used to come through this area when I’d pay him a visit. That good enough for ya?”
You cross your arms. “No. What’s his name?”
“Tommy.”
“What’s he look like?”
“Like me. Little younger. Little uglier.”
You laugh at that.
It makes Joel smile.
Maybe you could be the one he’s been looking for all this time. Too bad he had to waste so many others before he finally got to you.
The waitress comes back to your table soon after that, with your steaming plates of delicious-smelling food and hot mugs of coffee balanced expertly on a large plastic tray. She sets them down in front of the pair of you with a cheery smile, and you thank her happily when she doesn’t forget the extra sickeningly sweet cups of creamer you had requested. Joel doesn’t take his eyes off you once during the interaction, not even to feast his eyes upon the monstrous burger now sitting before him, not even as he thanks the waitress for delivering it to him. His lingering gaze makes you feel a little warm, but it could just be from the heat radiating off of your plates.
“What? You’re not getting a bite of mine, if that’s why you’re looking at me,” you tease, already getting to work putting the sugary creamer to good use.
Joel just shakes his head, his caramel colored eyes still never leaving you as your coffee begins to resemble their hue. “No, ‘s not why.”
“Whatever,” you reply through a giggle, making a poor attempt to hide your girlish grin behind the lip of your white ceramic mug. 
The two of you eat your meals in relative silence, mostly enjoying each other’s company and basking in the relaxing ambience created by silverware tapping against porcelain, hushed conversations, and the local country station playing through the old radio sitting on the counter. The reception is a little spotty way out here in wherever the hell you are, so you can’t quite tell what song it is. But Joel seems to know, judging by the rhythmic bouncing of his knee under the table that creates little circular ripples in your coffee. Maybe you’ll ask him what it is later, how he knows it, if you can listen to it again in the truck together. He doesn’t seem to be as much of an open book as you’ve already given yourself away to be, and you respect that about him. It doesn’t make you any less curious, but you resign yourself to getting to know him better in the small doses he’s willing to offer you. 
You decide to begin a mental list of all the things you want to ask him later, knowing that by the time you make it to the motel tonight, you’ll be far too exhausted to do anything more than just collapse onto the springy mattress and sleep until you get kicked out of the room the next morning. You almost wish you hadn’t listened to Joel’s request for you to take your coffee decaffeinated tonight, and you still aren’t quite sure why you did. It just feels so strangely easy to give into him, to trust him, to let him make decisions for you. You suppose that’s what you’ve been needing all this time, someone to guide you and understand you and at least pretend like they care about you. Joel has shown you more concern and care and protection in the last hour or so than either of your parents have pretty much your whole life. And he’s good at this, making you feel wanted, making you feel like somebody, even in subtle ways, just by looking at you.
“A’right, why don’t you finish up, darlin’, ‘n we’ll hit the road again. Practically usin’ your pancakes as a pillow over there.”
“Oh, sorry,” you apologize sleepily, waking yourself up enough to make quick work finishing off your plate and your last few sips of coffee. 
“Nothin’ to be sorry ‘bout, sweetheart. Lord knows you need some rest, won’t be too much longer now,” Joel assures, fishing a few tens out of his faded leather wallet and placing them on the table. He slides to the edge of the booth and stands himself up with only a few pained noises as he straightens out his back, then offers his hand for you to take. You use it as leverage to pull yourself upright, and your hands linger in each other’s hold for a few seconds longer than they need to. The hostess thanks the two of you for stopping in when you pass her by, and Joel opens the door for you again as you leave Moody’s. He opens the truck door for you, too, and promises you that the motel is just another couple of minutes down the freeway. You make an effort to stay awake in your seat this time as Joel begins the drive, opting to gaze out the window and focus on trying to make out the sparkling constellations above the treeline. You smile privately at the moon when you find that she’s following closely behind you just as she always does, bright and full. 
She doesn’t leave your side until you reach the unassuming little roadside motel, which to your gratitude, proudly displays their vacancy on the flickering sign in the parking lot. It doesn’t look like a five star joint by any means, but you know it will serve its purpose just fine. Joel instructs you to stay in the truck while he goes about getting a room for the two of you, and you don’t object. He’d insisted that you didn’t need to be on your feet any longer than you already had been today, and you were too tired to argue with him even if you wanted to. When he returns, he taps lightly on the passenger side window so as not to startle you from the half-asleep, half-awake state you’ve found yourself in, and swings your backpack over his shoulder as he helps you out of the truck. He leads you to the room at the end of the row, and the door takes some finessing of the key and a shove of his shoulder to open. Joel flicks on the light, and you let out a disappointed-sounding ‘oh…’ when it reveals your accommodations.
There aren’t two beds like you had assumed Joel was going to request. There’s only one.
Joel catches your reaction. “‘S this gonna be alright? I know it ain’t the Ritz Carlton, but—”
“No, the room’s fine, it’s not that. I just thought… I just assumed that… I didn’t know it was gonna be, like… just the one bed.” You try to explain your discomfort as gently as possible, without seeming ungrateful for everything Joel has done for you tonight.
He looks at you sympathetically. “I know, I ain’t tryin’ anythin’, I swear. Guy told me it was the last room they had, jus’ figured it was better than nothin’.” 
You offer him a soft smile, but your eyes must still look a little wide as you begin to nervously pick at your fingernails. Joel continues, “I can take the chair if you want, darlin’. Get the bed all to yourself, how’s that sound?”
You visibly relax at that, your shoulders deflating as your smile becomes a little more genuine. “Okay, that’s good. Thank you.”
“‘Course, sweetheart. How’s about you take a nice hot shower, rinse off some o’ that dirt you picked up from walkin’ all day… Don’t suppose you got some suitable clothes in here for sleepin’ in?” Joel asks, handing your backpack off to you.
You shake your head. “Just some jeans and t-shirts, and another pair of shoes. And… y’know, some underwear, and stuff.”
Joel pinches the bridge of his nose, then rubs his fingers across his forehead exasperatedly. “I swear… it’s like you didn’t think there’d be a tomorrow or somethin’, girl. Christ.” Joel looks out the window to his truck parked just outside. “Tell you what, think I got somethin’ in the truck you can wear. Why don’t you see if they got anythin’ on the TV tha’s worth a damn, ‘n I’ll be back, alright?”
You nod, “Okay,” then set your backpack down on the drab carpet in favor of picking up the remote perched in front of the small square television. You sit yourself down on the edge of the bed as Joel leaves the room, and begin to flick through the few channels that aren’t just a screen full of snowy static.
Local news. Commercial. Game show. Commercial. Documentary. Commercial. 
Eventually, you land on what seems to be one of those old black-and-white western shows that you can never remember the name of. You only know that the reruns used to play on Sundays around lunchtime, because Rob would always be half paying attention to it with a beer in his hand when you and your mom would get home from church. For how adamant she was that you attend every weekend, she sure never called him a harlot and a sinner for not wanting to go with her. You’re not sure she had ever even tried to get him to go, but he probably didn’t own anything decent enough to wear, anyway. Whatever, fuck them. The show seems like the kind of thing Joel would like, so you let it keep playing. 
He comes back a moment later with a small stack of folded up clothes, tossing them over to where you sit on the bed. You unfold what he’s given you and examine them—a pair of simple pink cotton shorts, and a white tank top with a ditsy floral pattern scattered across the fabric. The clothing is a little more revealing than you’d like, but you figure you’d be a hell of a lot more comfortable wearing them to sleep than the denim shorts you have on now.
“These are… great. Thank you, Joel. But…” you snicker. “Should I be concerned that you have a very convenient supply of girls’ clothes in your truck?” Joel scoffs. “‘S for when I got Tommy’s kid with me, smartass. He’s got a daughter, few years younger ‘n you.”
“Okay, well, I dunno how I was supposed to know that, but… as long as you don’t have a girlfriend who’s gonna come after me for wearing her clothes.”
Joel only chuckles in response, his attention suddenly pulled to the TV.
“Gunsmoke, huh? ‘S a good choice, definitely what I’d classify as ‘worth a damn’.”
You smile to yourself, and his approval makes that warm fluttery feeling return to your belly. “I didn’t even know what it was called, just seemed like something you’d like.”
He turns back to you. “That obvious, huh? ‘S just ‘cause I’m old and southern, ain’t it?”
“Maybe a little,” you admit, making a pinching gesture with your hand.
Joel nods as he makes his way over to the armchair on the corner of the room, collapsing onto it with a groan. “Well, why don’t you go ‘n get yourself all changed and cleaned up, ‘n if you’re quick enough maybe we can finish the episode together and then get some shuteye, hm?”
You swiftly unzip your backpack to retrieve one of your clean pairs of underwear, then bound over to the small bathroom with them and your new change of clothes in hand. It’s not the most spotless one you’ve ever had to use, but you’ve honestly seen much worse. You rinse off quickly in the steaming shower, using the scratchy motel-provided washcloth to scrub the dirt from your legs, stuck to you with the sweat you worked up from God knows how many miles of walking today. 
Today. You can hardly believe it hasn’t even been a full 24 hours since you left home yet. It seems like you’ve already known Joel for days, maybe even years, as silly as it sounds. You wonder if he might just take you in after this, or if he’ll have had enough of providing for you after just one night. He seems like a man of limited means, and he’s already given you so much. If you’re brave enough, maybe you’ll ask him tomorrow, when you get to the ‘so… what now?’ part of your time together.
For now, you step out of the shower and dry yourself off with an impossibly scratchier towel, then pull on your panties and the tank top and shorts Joel provided you with.
Jesus, how much younger is Tommy’s daughter?
The shorts just barely cover your ass, and there’s a sizable gap between their waistband and the bottom hem of your top. The thin, white material of the shirt only serves to accentuate the way your nipples poke through the fabric, but you suppose there isn’t anything you can do about that.
You quietly crack open the bathroom door, and are somewhat relieved to find that Joel’s already fallen asleep in the chair. You do wish you could’ve finished the episode of Gunsmoke with him, but the end credits seem to be rolling already anyway, and you’d rather avoid being seen in your very ill-fitting pajamas. Although, you do wonder if he’d say anything, or if he’d just let his hungry gaze linger in silence again, holding himself back from touching you beyond a comforting pat on the thigh.
You pick the remote up off the bed and use it to make the TV screen sizzle to black, then tip toe over to the lightswitch by the door and turn it off, the room now completely shrouded in darkness. Joel snores softly from the chair as you blindly feel your way back over to the bed, pulling the covers back and nestling yourself underneath them. The bed is surprisingly comfortable, considering, and it doesn’t take long for your exhaustion to catch up with you. Your thoughts become slower and slower along with your breathing, and you’re asleep not even five minutes after your head hits the pillow.
The last room they had, yeah, right. You’re just the most pathetic little thing, aren’t you? You’ll believe just about anything that comes out of his mouth if he turns up the ‘southern charm’ dial a few ticks, throws in a feigned apologetic-looking expression for good measure. It’s sad, really. For you, anyway.
Joel fakes his snoring for another thirty minutes or so, until he’s certain you’re sound asleep. He had heard your breath even out almost immediately after you had tucked yourself in, but he had chosen to lay in wait for a little while longer, just to make sure you wouldn’t put up too much of a fight when he made his move. You don’t seem like the type, considering how you’d hardly argued with him at all tonight, like when he had convinced you to forgo the caffeine with your dinner. There’s a reason he wanted you sleepy and subdued tonight, but you didn’t know that. Joel likes how well you listen to him, how easily you do as he asks.
He also likes how warm you are, how small your body is compared to his own, the difference in size especially prominent now that he’s laying snugly against you, his front pressing firmly into the back of you. You don’t wake from his lumbering movement, only coming to slightly when you feel his arm slide underneath your body, his warm hand snaking its way beneath your tiny shirt to squeeze at your plush tits. 
You mumble out a little “Hm?”, which he’s quick to quiet with, “Sorry, darlin’. Chair was too hard on my damn back. Just go back to sleep, ‘kay?” That chair felt like laying on a goddamn cloud compared to some of the other surfaces he’s found himself having to sleep on before, but again, you don’t know that, and what you don’t know won’t hurt you. You probably won’t even remember this in the morning, how his hard cock is slotted so perfectly against your ass, especially without the confines of his thick jeans holding him back. They’re discarded onto the floor now in front of the armchair, along with his flannel shirt and jacket. Joel holds you tightly against his bare, hairy chest as he circles a roughened pad of his finger around one of your nipples, smirking to himself at how quickly the bud hardens from his touch. He knew you wanted this, and the wet spot that the fingers of his other hand are teasing in the gusset of your panties is proof of it. How long have you been leaking for him like this? Had you been soaking the seat of his truck earlier today? Filthy thing.
You still don’t rouse when he pulls your panties aside and slips a finger inside your slick cunt, or when his grip on your tit loosens in favor of sliding up higher under your tank top, his hand coming to a rest around the base of your throat as he pumps his finger in and out of your tight heat. It would be so fucking easy…
But he can’t, he won’t, because you’re not like the others. You want to get to know him, you let him take care of you, you seem to like his company, and you don’t leap out of bed and call him a fucking perv and a dirty old man for what he’s doing to you. That’s what the others would have done. It’s what they have done. And they faced the consequences.
But you’re different. You’re not like them. You’re like him. A lost soul, that’s what you are. Nowhere to call home, no one who misses you or loves you or gives a damn what happens to you. Joel’s mouth had tasted bitter when he had told you about Tommy, or rather, lied about him. Joel hasn’t seen the fucker in years, certainly doesn’t pay him any visits or watch his brat, not since Tommy had learned the truth. You better not show your goddamn face around here ever again, you understand me? Tommy had spat at him. You’re fuckin’ sick. Only reason I don’t turn your ass in myself is ‘cause you’re my goddamn brother. But if I ever fuckin’ see you again, I won’t hesitate. Better make yourself pretty fuckin’ scarce ‘fore I change my mind. That might’ve been about the only time Joel had ever taken orders from his little brother. 
That bitter flavor is cut by the sweet tang of you that he tastes on his finger now, so young and eager and fresh. The hand around your throat squeezes a little tighter, and Joel’s hips begin to move against your ass as he allows himself to suck wet kisses onto the skin under the hinge of your jaw. Softly, gently, so as not to wake you. He could come just like this, using your pliant body in your sleep, rutting himself against your still form with the taste of your pussy on his tongue and his fingers pressed against your pulse points.
He’s close when you stir again, making broken hiccuping sounds as you choke on your breath.
“Shh, shh,” Joel soothes. “You’re alright, sweetheart. ‘S just me. Just—fuck—hold still, go back to sleep, baby.” You let out a quiet whimper, squirming against him just a little bit, but return to your unmoving and silent state a second later. Joel finishes himself off quickly with another couple of shallow thrusts against you, his large hand still gripped around the column of your neck, trying to stifle his groans as he spills into his briefs. He removes his suffocating hand and keeps you pressed tightly against him for a while after that, tanned arms wrapped around your waist and breathing in your scent as he waits for you to settle back down. 
When he’s sure he won’t disturb you again, Joel releases you from his hold and pads quietly back over to the armchair, redressing himself and resuming the position you had left him in. In the morning, if you do remember any of it, you’ll just chalk it up to a very strange dream, one fueled by the desire he knows you’ve felt towards him since he picked you up. You’ll be left with a strange assuredness that he feels the same way about you, without really knowing why. 
But Joel will always know.
The digital clock on the nightstand only reads around 8:00 when you’re awoken by a beam of sunlight shining brightly against the backs of your eyelids, streaming in from the window’s lopsided blinds. You had gone to sleep with your back to Joel, but you find yourself facing him now. He looks kind of peaceful when he’s asleep, that permanent furrow etched between his brows finally smoothed out as he dozes. A small smile tugs at the corners of your lips, but they fall quickly when you adjust your legs and feel the cool dampness against your core, the sensation bringing back the memory of the dream you’d had last night. 
It had felt so real, but it couldn’t have been, could it? There’s no evidence that Joel had really laid next to you last night, that he’d really touched you like that, that you’d wanted him to keep going. It must just be some kind of strange side effect of the affection you feel toward the man who had rescued you, more or less. You’ll likely just part ways after today, anyway, so it’s probably best to just try and forget about the whole thing, put on a fresh pair of underwear and pretend it never happened. 
Joel is awake by the time you’re done freshening up in the bathroom, and he greets you with a raspy ‘Mornin’, sweetheart’ as you retrieve your backpack from next to the bed and shove your ruined underwear into the bottom of it. “You get some good sleep last night?” He asks, rubbing a hand over his eye.
“Mhm, the bed was nice, more comfortable than the one I had at home, honestly.” You finish zipping your backpack closed and sit back down on the bed, pulling on some socks and the lace up sneakers you had been wearing yesterday. “I hope the chair was okay, like, for your back and everything.”
“What makes you say that, baby?”
You pause in the middle of tying one of your shoelaces, turning to look at him with a confused pout. “Didn’t you…? I thought you had told me something about how the chair would be hard on your back. Like, last night.”
Joel frowns, shaking his head. “Don’t think so, darlin’. Chair was just fine.”
“Oh… Well, that’s good.”
Maybe it had just been a dream, then.
Joel hands you a few bills from his wallet, and tasks you with getting the two of you some breakfast from the gas station across the street while he cleans himself up. He tells you that he doesn’t eat much in the mornings, but that you can get yourself whatever you want, as long as you bring him back a carton of cigarettes and a black coffee. You obey eagerly, retrieving what he asked for and getting a pack of miniature powdered donuts and an equally as sugary coffee for yourself.
He’s just stepped out of the bathroom when you return to the room, and your face feels hot when you see him with his dark hair slicked back and wet from the shower. The few strands that fall onto his forehead as he laces up his boots almost make him look a little boyish, despite his whitened temples. 
“Such a good girl, thank you,” Joel praises when you hand him his items. 
You respond with a shy ‘You’re welcome’, but he doesn’t miss how you seem to light up at his words. You plop yourself down onto the worn-in chair that Joel had used as a bed last night, happily munching on your gas station donuts and sipping on your coffee. It all makes you feel warm from the inside out.
But you figure you should find out what the rest of today might look like before you let yourself enjoy the beginnings of it too much.
“So, um… We’re just gonna check out this morning and then… what?” 
“Whaddya mean, baby?”
“I mean… are you just gonna, like… take me to the nearest bus station or something?”
Joel’s confusion is written all over his face, embedded deep into those lines between his brows. You could swear he almost looks a little hurt. “Why would I do that? ‘S that what you want?” He asks softly.
You try to backpedal a little, afraid you might’ve offended him or seemed ungrateful in your question. “I just thought it might be what you want. That you probably have somewhere else you need to be, like Tommy’s or—”
“No, I don’t,” Joel says definitively.
You pause. “Okay, so—”
“You ever been to California?”
His question stumps you for a moment, seeming so random in its nature. “No.”
“You want to?”
You shrug. “I mean… sure. Maybe someday—”
“Why don’t you come with me then, baby?”
You let out an awkward giggle. “...Come with you where?”
“To California. Come with me.” Joel’s tone is genuine but firm.
“Like, today? Are you sure?”
“I mean, we ain’t gettin’ there today, darlin’. But yeah, I’m sure. We both got nowhere else to be, do we? So let’s just go, we’ll see it together.”
You beam up at him, realizing that he’s being serious. Joel does want you, wants you to be his companion, maybe even something more that you’ll discover on familiar-looking back roads and in cities you’ve only ever seen pictures of. 
“Okay,” you agree excitedly. 
Joel nods. “Okay, then. Lemme go check us out ‘n we’ll get back on the road again. Burnin’ daylight already,” he jokes. He carries your backpack out to the truck for you, setting it down between your feet after he opens the door and helps you inside with a stable hand. It only takes a few minutes for Joel to hand in the room key and pay for the night, and then he’s back at your side. You begin to feel like that’s where you always want him to stay. 
“So, where to first, baby? California ain’t goin’ anywhere, can take as long to get there as we wanna. We’ll go wherever you like, take your pick.” Joel leans across your body to dig a folded up map out of the glove compartment, handing it to you. 
You examine it, your eyes darting across the dozens of dots with the names of cities next to them, some you’ve never even heard of. You point to one that you have heard of, but have never been to, because you’ve never even left the state you grew up in before.
“Um… how about Detroit? I’ve heard it’s nice, I think.”
Joel belly laughs at that. “It ain’t, but sure. You wanna go to Detroit, that’s where we’ll go. Buckle up, baby,” he instructs, patting your thigh. You oblige, and it feels good to finally know where you’re going, and that you’re going there with someone who cares about you, who feels safe, who wants you around. You also feel a little hopeful that maybe you were right about Ruby, after all. That you didn’t start walking for nothing, that you weren’t following some childish delusion, that if something as good as Joel had happened to you when you left, that maybe she had found herself on a similar path, ran into somebody good who took her wherever she wanted to go and helped her find someplace she belonged. Maybe she found her way out to California, eventually. What you are certain of is that neither of you ever have to go back to that town ever again, and that feels good, too.
And if it feels good, then it can’t be bad.
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tag list: tag list: @beefrobeefcal @iamasaddie @rebel-held @dilfgestivo @zliteraturehoe @joeldjarin @kamcrazy123 @hellowoolf @rexamongthestars @stevie75 @luxurychristmaspudding @noisynightmarepoetry @mewantpeepaw @pedritoferg @alex-does-art-things @evolnoomym @annoyingmarvelreader @k1l4ni @joelsdagger (if your name is crossed out, it won’t let me tag you!!)
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xomakara · 2 months ago
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Love Under the Western Sky
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SUMMARY | Two businessmen, Yunho and Mingi, are kidnapped by you, a female outlaw, and your gang, but eventually fall in love and build a life with you and your community.   
PAIRINGS | Yunho x Reader x Mingi
GENRE | businessman!Yunho, businessman!Mingi, outlaw!Reader, Western AU (off to the wild west we go), non-idol au, smut
CONTENT/WARNINGS | profanity/strong language, drinking, kidnapping, threesome, mentions of violence (gunfights), fingering, blowjobs, double penetration sex, unprotective sex, dirty talk, praising, pet names
RATING | Mature, NSFW, EXPLICIT, MDNI, 18+
LENGTH | 15,491 words
TAGLIST | --
NETWORKS | @illusionnet @atzhouse @cromernet @wonderlandnet
@k-vanity @othersideoutlawsnetwork @ksmutsociety
AUTHOR’S NOTE | Finally took forever! I want to thank @hobeemin for the beautiful banner/divider and @daddyfordaeddy for beta reading this long ass fic. Don’t forget to like, comment, reblog and show some support. Love you all 💚
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Yunho and Mingi did not imagine being in this situation. They did not think that they'd be tied up together as a band of crazy outlaws surrounded them.
"We're so fucked," Yunho said as he looked at Mingi. They were both bound by their wrists to each other's backs. Mingi was fiddling with the knot, but it seemed hopeless.
"It's your fault for flirting with her," Mingi snapped. "If you would've just listened to me‒"
"How was I supposed to know that she'd tie us up?!" Yunho replied. "I didn't even think she was a bandit! I thought she was just a pretty lady on the train."
"And look what happened!" Mingi retorted.
Yunho scowled. "Oh shut up. You were flirting with her too. If anyone should be blamed, it's you. You're the one who wanted to start a business out West."
"It was a good opportunity!" Mingi exclaimed.
"Yeah, and we lost our money. Good job," Yunho said sarcastically.
"Hey!" Mingi exclaimed. "If you didn't take the gamble with that asshole‒"
"Shut up, both of you!" You turned to face Mingi and Yunho, a knife pressed against your palm. The sight of you approaching made Mingi nervous.
He had heard of the West being a rough place. And he'd heard of bandits roaming the land, taking whatever they pleased. But he'd also heard of ladies like you. Pretty faces who lulled men into a false sense of security with their smiles before robbing them. He just never thought he'd actually meet a lady like that. And that lady being so damn beautiful was unfair too!
"Miss!" Mingi started. "Whatever you do, don't shoot us. I have money back home. A nice home and a lot of money. If you just let us go, I could make sure you-"
"Let you go?" You scoffed, grabbing Mingi's chin, holding his jaw. He tensed as your thumb moved over his lips. "Now why would I do that, pretty boy? I like a man with a mouth."
"Pretty bo‒ hey! Leave Mingi alone!" Yunho snapped.
"Or what, big boy?" you taunted.
"Big‒" Yunho began to stutter.
"Forget it," Mingi sighed as he looked at you. "Can we please just get this over with? Just rob us and send us on our way."
"Honey," you chuckled. "You really think we just want a bag full of cash?" You leaned down in front of the two and placed the tip of the knife beneath Mingi's chin. You trailed the blade along the length of Mingi's neck, giving him a grin. "You and big boy over here are part of the loot."
Yunho grumbled as you stepped away to greet a couple members of your gang as they finished raiding the train cars. "What the hell did they mean we were part of the loot? Why wouldn't they just take our things? Wouldn't it be easier? That's what I'd do, if I were an outlaw."
"You can't ask something like 'wouldn't it be easier'!" Mingi hissed. "There's plenty of shit outlaws can do."
"Okay, well if I were a murderer, you wouldn't be my loot," Yunho scoffed. "No offense."
"A little bit taken," Mingi admitted.
"Whatever. This doesn't matter. We just need to find a way to escape," Yunho sighed as he twisted around, trying to untie the ropes around his wrists. "Just keep an eye out for a sharp object or something."
Mingi nods. It wasn't going to be an easy task to get loose, not when a member of the gang had kept watch on them every minute they could, ensuring that Mingi and Yunho didn't get anywhere. But as Mingi had a thought to perhaps strangle Yunho for putting them in the position they were currently in, another member of your band made his way to the two.
"Hello boys," he smiled, squatting in front of the two with the ax on his shoulder. Both Mingi and Yunho tried to speak, but neither were able to form words under the pressure that man's presence seemed to exude.
"Shit," Yunho whispered, "we're really fucked now."
"Shut it, both of you," you turned, crossing your arms as you walked over. "Jongho, they're looking to escape. Keep an eye on them."
"No worries," Jongho replied. "I got 'em."
"Get Yeosang over here to help you," you said as you looked at the train platform. "I'll get the rest of the gang to load up the horses and wagons. Then we ride off with these two big fish."
"Are we bringing any other folks?" Jongho asked.
You hummed as you squatted down and looked at both Yunho and Mingi, turning their faces. Both men looked at you like children being scolded. Your laugh couldn't be stopped as you patted their faces and stood back up. "These two will be more than enough. If anyone is looking for them, I bet they're gonna offer a lot. And if they won't, we'll sell 'em," you said it simply, shrugging it off.
"Well, boss, I reckon you're right. Anybody that would travel in luxury like them must be rich," Jongho nudges Mingi, making the man scoff. "Hell, with a pretty face like yours, boy, you'll be worth double, ya hear me?"
You laughed as Mingi huffed in response to being teased. You tapped Yunho on the cheek, catching his attention. "And I can see why you'd make quite the catch too, sweet pea. And a smart one I'd suppose. Just look at that handsome face."
"I‒" Yunho couldn't even come up with a response, not that anyone cared to hear him talk. You laughed again.
"That settles it then," Jongho turned, and, as instructed by you, went to retrieve Yeosang. "We best get these boys loaded up."
"Give me your kerchiefs," you ordered. "We don't need any yelling or shouting to draw attention."
"Yes, Boss. Got it." Jongho patted your shoulder and began to make his way to Yeosang, leaving you with Mingi and Yunho as members of your gang began to herd passengers onto the train again.
It was not difficult for you. Not at all. 
However, you still had quite a job ahead.
"C'mere, sweet cheeks," you leaned down, getting right in Yunho's space. Your lips close to his ear as you whisper. "You want out, you'll have to ask me."
"You are absolutely mental‒" Yunho gasped. "Please, let us go‒"
You press a finger against his lips, cutting off any begging from the man. 
"Shh, sweetheart. If I wanted you to beg, I'd put that pretty mouth of yours to use," you chuckled, standing up straight once again. Yunho did nothing to hide the flustered expression and you simply flashed him a sly smile as you gagged him. You turned to Mingi. "How about you pretty boy?"
"Uh..." Mingi felt embarrassed just from you having tied the gag in Yunho's mouth and could imagine how red his face must be. "I was gonna beg‒"
"Hush," you hummed. "Sweet talking can get you places, but here? Not with me, it won't." You stroked his face, the smile returning to your features. "However, I would appreciate a silent partner. Like your friend there."
You turn from Mingi, deciding it'd be easier to let Yeosang and Jongho help you finish the job rather than tease the two boys for much longer.
After gagging Mingi, your boys do their job well, helping load Mingi and Yunho onto the back of a wagon to prevent them from running away. As much as your heart fluttered watching these tall men be tossed and turned by Yeosang and Jongho, it wouldn't be fun to chase them down should they decide to run off.
You mounted your own horse, petting her neck. She gave a slight whine before letting you settle. 
"I know, sweet girl," you coo. "Almost finished. Once we get home we'll be sure to give you lots of apples." She perks up and you chuckle.
"Got 'em, boss," Jongho announced. His horse trotting up beside yours. He stopped, tossing the reins of a mare that was following. You caught them, giving them a gentle tug, startling the horse.
"Good," you said, "I think it's time we leave."
You watched as Hongjoong and Seonghwa rode beside the wagons. San and Wooyoung on the back of wagons keeping close watch on the hostages and loot.
"Our day will end successfully, boys!" You shout.
They shout and cheer, happy from a day of plunder and robbery. It was quite the sight to behold and the poor city folk who saw your little caravan riding off into the wild definitely knew not to trifle with you or your people.
By now Mingi and Yunho had gotten comfortable with the ropes and their gags. Well, as comfortable as one could get with their ankles and wrists bound together and forced to ride in the back of a wagon.
In fact, as you and your crew got far off from the tracks, the rope around their wrists was cut by one of the men as a kind gesture.
"Looks like you two are the lucky ones. Our boss has a soft heart," Wooyoung added with a grin as he untied the last of Mingi's ropes and the gags. "But if y'all try to escape or scream, not sure what boss will do to you.”
"Oh trust me, we've heard the threats," Mingi replied as he rubbed his sore wrists. He sat up and looked at you, who was riding slightly behind the last wagon, speaking to Seonghwa and Hongjoong. "Who is she, anyways?"
“I’ll tell you the basics but don’t you dare repeat it to Boss or you’ll both be six feet under, got that?” Wooyoung warned.
The men nodded their heads quickly, agreeing that keeping their heads attached to their bodies would be preferred.
“Well… our boss comes from a rich family, back East,” Wooyoung explained. “Tons of land, cows, money and a father with an ill temper. The name isn’t something I feel too happy sayin’ aloud but they’re well known. Their sons, I guess you’d say they’re their greatest achievement. Good looks, but those same bad habits that plagued their father. But he had an eldest who was the best of them. Smart. Quick to make deals. Definitely the favorite out of the three sons. Boss’s family never paid her much attention since they thought their first son would be a good investment for her father.”
"So wait..." Mingi hums, rubbing his sore wrists and watching you intently.
"Don't interrupt, boy," San clicked his tongue. "So long story short, Boss got fed up, robbed her older brother and his finances, left, and moved West where she began working in saloons before picking up some o' my friends along the way and started forming a gang of her own."
Wooyoung nudged San in the ribs, making the man wince. 
"Awww, it's not just any old gang, it's a band of brothers and our lovely boss in charge," Wooyoung said happily as the cart came to a halt, forcing you and Seonghwa to move into the front of the caravans.
"Maybe today is our lucky day, Mingi," Yunho nudged his companion.
"Lucky?" Mingi whispered. "We were kidnapped by an insane woman, and her group of bandits are kidnapping us! What part of that could be called luck?! She might just have us killed at her command and if we escape it could cause an uproar with her people. I'd say we were really and truly cursed to ever get to the West."
Yunho rolled his eyes. "You are stupid."
“Hey!” Mingi exclaimed, feeling offended.
"She obviously could have killed us if we had offended her. She took a liking to you because you're pretty, pretty boy," Yunho scoffed.
“Well she's been eyeing you, big boy,” Mingi teased. “Haven't you noticed the way she looks at us?”
Yunho opened his mouth, wanting to say you'd looked at them the same way plenty of ladies had. However, when Yunho took a deep breath to counter Mingi's theory, you appeared with a water canteen in your hand.
"Alright boys, take a drink. You might not be bound but you aren't gonna cause trouble are you?" You were smirking and Yunho hated himself for the blush rising from his neck up to his face.
Mingi takes the canteen first and takes a quick chug, realizing just how parched he had gotten. He pulls away from the canteen and looks at Yunho.
You flash a quick, cheeky grin. "See? Pretty Boy likes the treatment. I wonder if Big Boy is the same. Care for a taste, sweet thing?"
Mingi watched you teasingly pat Yunho's cheek with the back of your hand. He passed the water to Yunho, and after gulping down a bit of the refreshing water, Yunho gently pushed your hand aside and let go of the canteen.
"Gotta admit," Yunho shrugged. "I thought a pretty woman wouldn't go around shooting innocent folk."
"You know," you tilted your head. "People used to tell me I was sweet, pretty... so innocent. Nowadays they tell me that I'm mean, greedy and absolutely out of my mind. People love to judge."
"I can see why," Yunho admitted with a quiet hum, looking towards your retreating form. "But I have to admit. For a woman running with a gang of outlaws..."
"I'm not running with them, big boy," you stated. "They're running with me. Remember that."
You disappeared to continue talking to Seonghwa and Hongjoong, the two main strategists of the gang. Once you had gone, Mingi hushed his tone to a low whisper. "What the hell was that?!"
“I'm just admitting that I can see why men go chasing after her,” Yunho confessed.
"For the love of god," Mingi pinched the bridge of his nose. "Are you really this naive, or are you just ignoring the possibility she could kill you and I, and dump our corpses right here?!"
"Look..." Yunho rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm trying to work on being optimistic."
"Trying. Trying," Mingi mimicked. "That's rich."
“Okay! Fine, genius, you have an idea then!” Yunho challenged.
"Well, no, not yet," Mingi responded, looking at the scenery around them.
"We're fucked aren't we, pretty boy?” Yunho sighed.
"...Yes."
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It had only been one night under the open night and another day of travel, but Yunho and Mingi were honestly ready to be killed, whether by the cold or by the outlaws. The blanket on top of their bodies provided little to no warmth and while they tried their hardest not to freeze in the back of the covered wagon, you were bundled up nicely.
As soon as it seemed the two would have finally lost feeling in their fingertips, you turned to them with the same, cool, indifferent gaze as the rest of the outlaw gang. Your features were smooth, but they all had hard eyes, and your band was made of some of the most brutal cowboys and bandits.
"I'm impressed, gentlemen. How are you not frozen stiff?” you asked, surprised.
Yunho wondered this as well, and found himself trembling from the chill that nipped at his nose, ears, and fingers. The flimsy, dirty cloth the two shared between the both of them offered little protection from the cold, and no comfort.
"Can I ask you a question? A personal one," Yunho was rubbing his numb fingers, desperate for heat.
You are riding next to the wagon again. Seonghwa and Hongjoong are still not willing to let you ride ahead on your own, in the event either of your hostages were foolish. "Since you were brave enough to ask it, yes. You may. It depends on the question though."
"Fair point," Yunho acknowledged. He and Mingi could have just asked anything to anger you. "My question... Why outlaws? If your family is as well off as I'm assuming-"
"So one of the two idiots," you looked at San and Wooyoung who both suddenly avoided looking at you, "told you, huh? It was bound to happen... But that is a fair question. In return, can I ask you some questions, big boy?"
"Sure," Yunho nodded.
"I know you have some skill with a gun, big boy. That must have come from a long line of working cowboys or farmers, right? Compared to pretty boy there," you point to Mingi, the man practically fuming about being called pretty boy. You continue. "It's just a feeling I got. Why didn't you grab a gun? Try to save yourself, sweet pea? Or maybe pretty boy was holding you back?"
Yunho shifts. His necktie hanging loose, and his clothes being an absolute mess. He shrugged, trying his hardest not to stammer. He was absolutely nervous by your blunt observation, yet could not say you were wrong.
"Funny..." Yunho muttered. "You read me pretty well."
"So? Why were you worried about that pretty face of yours, Mister...?" You looked at Yunho, trying to fish for a name.
"Yunho. Jeong Yunho," He cleared his throat. "Yea. And this is Song Mingi. He's my business partner and best friend. We've come out West to make a new future for the two of us. Mingi can use a gun but isn't a master at it. I wouldn't call him a coward, but he'd be a fool if he ever decided to pick a fight he knows he can't win."
“And you?” you asked, “Would you have shot me and the rest of my gang if pretty boy wasn't here, or did you hesitate for another reason? A lady in the group, for instance. Are you a man who won't shoot a woman, Jeong Yunho?”
Mingi gulps. "Don't answer that, Yunho‒"
Yunho doesn't get a word out before you interject, "Let him speak, pretty boy."
"I hesitated, because even if you're a woman, I'm not a fan of shoot-outs," Yunho explained, staring directly into your eyes.
"Is that so?" You seem satisfied enough by that answer, a grin plastered on your face. It unsettles Yunho. You have something behind that grin, he was sure of it. "Since you answered a few of my questions, I'll answer yours. Yes, I'm from a well-off family, and yes my father is a wealthy landowner. He owns thousands of acres of farmland, livestock, and plenty of money. My mother was a socialite from overseas, and my oldest brother was gifted with good looks and smarts and was the favorite son. My other two older brothers were spoiled rotten and used my mother's social influence and our father's business ventures to try and bed as many girls they wanted. Me on the other hand? I was the black sheep in the family."
“May I ask why?” Yunho inquired.
You crossed your arms, taking a quick look around. As much as you admired Yunho for his handsome face, your trust in people had already run dry from years of interaction with your parents and your brothers.
"To put it simply, I wasn't perfect enough to bag a rich man who was perfect in my parents' eyes," your bitterness could be felt throughout your entire body. "I was 'too mouthy', 'opinionated’, and definitely didn't ‘act enough like a lady.' I learned how to shoot guns, ride horses like my brothers, and could tussle like any ole cowboy. So, when I realized no man of worth wanted a tomboy as a wife, I stole from my older brother, set off west to build my own fortune and found the friends you see surrounding us. With a bit of their help, the fortune I inherited from the past years of robberies and swindling is only getting bigger."
"Now tell me," you suddenly frowned. "Do you think I'd be content with the life of a trophy wife and a woman with nothing to her name, while you men get praised for being adventurers, explorers, and the kings of the world? To hell with that, sweet pea. I prefer the freedom to do what I want, to tame what I see. There's no room for people who get in the way."
You pointed the muzzle of your rifle towards the men and stared straight on. "You should know, Jeong Yunho. If you or Mister Song Mingi decides to try to kill any of my men, or escape, I will not hold back. This isn't an invitation to stay and work with us, this is a warning for what will happen if you don't behave yourselves."
"Got it... but it is awfully cold back here," Mingi finally added. 
You did feel a bit bad for them since they had given no problem at all thus far. Sure, there were times they both had argued about when would be the best time to escape and make a break for it, but ultimately, Yunho just didn't see the reason to harm or attempt an attack on someone who was not outright being hostile to them. He was a neutral man. Even when your crew had stopped for a bite to eat, both the hostages ate their meals in silence. Mingi did glare every so often and Yunho just seemed to zone out, even as some of your gang poked a little fun.
You nodded over to San, who threw a quilt to the hostages. "Fine. Since I trust you to be quiet for another few hours. We'll be stopping soon so everyone can stretch and sleep comfortably. Don't make me regret this, boys."
As much as Mingi complained, the extra warmth felt better than the previous night. The quilt was still dirty and probably hadn't been washed in a few days, but it was better than before. Yunho couldn't exactly hide his yawn and the way he relaxed now that the chill from his shoulders had gone. The threat of freezing to death was gone, but he felt a prickle down his back from you staring.
You turned your head back and patted your horse, cooing softly to the animal. Mingi caught your smile from the corner of his eye and pouted slightly, his lips puffing out more. He kept staring for a few moments longer, before Yunho nudged him.
"What?" Mingi whispered harshly.
"And you said that I was the one gawking. Looks like you can't help yourself from drooling over her either," Yunho snickers quietly. Mingi punches Yunho in the arm. "Oww! Will you stop hitting me?!"
"I won't let you make fun of me! Not when she's not listening!" Mingi points in your direction. 
“Then stop looking at her,” Yunho said.
“You stop looking at her!” Mingi retorted.
The banter continued a little while longer, and with the warmth from the quilt and a full stomach, Mingi began to feel his body sag. You listened as your gang members all laughed to themselves and teased your two hostages. You shook your head, not allowing them to know that they amused you.
When you approached Hongjoong and Seonghwa, you motioned them to dismount their horses for a moment. The rest of the men listened and stayed out of your sight as you moved towards the cart where the hostages were waiting.
"I hate to admit it, but our little hostages are surprisingly nice people," Seonghwa hummed thoughtfully, ignoring the angry glare sent by Yunho, and Mingi's nervous glances. Seonghwa was fairly intimidating, with his shaggy hair and sharp gaze. "The big one could have shot us when he had the chance."
"Sure," You agreed. "I feel a little bad but teasing them has been so fun."
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Mingi frowned as he had been contemplating everything that had been going on for the last day. They had not been beaten, nor were the hostages harassed beyond teasing. It was weirdly entertaining to find out that he and Yunho were seen as oddities because they didn't fight back. He thought at the beginning of how Yunho got them in this mess.
Yunho didn't have to flirt with the pretty woman he saw on the train. They could have been in another compartment and be far away from this woman and her insane, outlaw group. Why of all things did Jeong Yunho just have to stare at the pretty, petite young woman? 
Okay, sure Mingi thought she was just another passenger, maybe on her way west to visit family or something like that. Yet there she was, dressed to impress and there were whispers from fellow passengers when she got on. Even he could see the glimmer in his partner's eyes and hear the small comments that came out when Yunho first laid eyes on her. She was a beauty in anyone's books. Mingi and Yunho had a soft spot for dames and never considered that would be their downfall.
Yunho should have never caught her gaze and then before they knew it the dame came sitting across them. He kept the conversations light and easy between them three, and Mingi found himself taken along for the ride as they sat through hours of the same scenery, yet felt the journey go by just a bit faster thanks to a pretty gal like her being part of the equation.
When the sun started to set, that's when everything turned a bit south. There were six outlaws that pulled their horses over to the rail cars, their hats worn down and their faces shadowed from view by the shadows of their broad brimmed Stetson hats and the darkness setting around the group. Their movements were swift, pulling out guns that seemed to be as natural for them as breathing.
"Toss those weapons in here and stay inside ladies and gentlemen," said one man in the group, whose lips curled back into a crooked smirk.
"Miss, please stay in the compartment," Yunho assured the pretty lady. "You don't want to deal with the likes of these types of people."
You watch quietly, sitting in your seat without worry. The gunslingers came their way and took any weapons the other travelers had. When they got close, the two men's hands moved towards their belts in an instant.
"Leave the pretty lady alone or we'll have problems," Yunho stepped closer, pointing his pistol towards the gunslingers, though his finger hovered over the trigger, his movement unsure.
You glared at him with the iciest tone either man had heard in their lives. "Who are you calling a pretty lady?"
Your hand came around his gun, quickly prying it away, before yanking Yunho forward by the neckerchief that rested against his neck.
"H-hey!" Mingi saw her slam her head straight into the tallest man, bringing him to his knees.
"Thanks for the compliment, boys," you smirked, training the gun in his face. "But you'll find that I'm no dame or damsel in need of saving."
Yunho clutched his forehead, his brain running in circles as the two cowboys behind him jeered and poked fun at him. His expression dropped once his mind started working again and the pain subsided.
You turned to the outlaws. "Tie 'em up boys."
And now they were here sitting in front of the fire pit with outlaws watching their every move. Seonghwa stood beside the cooking fire, watching a bubbling stew boil. Wooyoung was still near them and just watching his surroundings.
“Here,” Mingi looked up when you handed him a bowl of stew. After that fiasco of a train heist, Mingi couldn't help but stare appreciatively at your figure. You no longer wore the dress from the train but instead wore a pair of britches that hugged your legs in just the right place. Mingi sighed, cursing the way his thoughts got out of hand. "Thanks..."
Yunho gladly took a bowl as well. And almost immediately he could taste a pinch of spices, he sniffed deeply. The stew was basic and yet it was the most flavorful one he's had for a long while. It was nice for them to take care of their hostages instead of starving them. They have plenty, and yet they were willing to share a meal.
After a long day, the stars were clear in the sky. The waning moon cast its glow on the land as the horses whinnied, happily feeding and drinking out of the troughs the outlaws left behind. Everyone had found their bedding areas, not too far away from their fire pits that now had hot coals in place and wood pieces above them to keep everyone warm.
While Yunho watched the flames dance, his thoughts wandered, mainly focused on his partner, and their trip. How did it come to this, he wondered. The two had a goal of starting a store of sorts, far away from the overbearing presence of families. For once, he wished for his old life. The one where he didn't worry about being held hostage, and Mingi wouldn't stare at him while he contemplated his decisions.
"If you look at me like that," Yunho began. "It feels like you are judging me for how stupid I was earlier."
He can't look at his friend right now. If he did, there is no telling whether Mingi is still mad, or still annoyed by the turn of events. Yet, Mingi's laughter surprised him. "Oh, I was definitely judging. I can't believe you got cocky around a woman and let her get the jump on us."
"Sorry," he laughed.
"All jokes aside..." Mingi placed a gentle hand on his friend's shoulder. "She is definitely a very different kind of woman."
A quiet settled upon the two friends. The crackling fire did little to calm Yunho's racing thoughts as the heat filled the cool evening air. In the distance, Yunho watched as you patted your horse, murmuring and comforting the large animal. A quiet, loving gesture shared with your animal companion, that the horse returned in the form of nuzzling its snout close to your neck and an affectionate lick from their tongue. The sight brought a smile to Yunho's lips as you let out a giggle, brushing your hand through the horses' mane. It was a peaceful display of affection, and his heart calmed a touch.
When you made it back into the clearing, he averted his gaze as you approached.
"It is getting late," your voice startled both of the men, their bodies immediately stiff. "Try to get some sleep like the rest of the guys. We leave at dawn. Don't try to escape or you'll get a shot to the leg, so stay put."
"Okay..." Mingi agreed.
"Hey, before you leave," Yunho paused. "We didn't catch your name earlier. Is it alright if we can get it?"
Your response was curt, as you eyed Yunho and Mingi carefully. "Y/N."
Yunho watches you turn and move away from him, towards one of the bedrolls that seemed to be set up for you, laying your weapon close by and then proceeding to climb in, rolling your body until the blanket covered your figure. A soft sigh leaves your lips before you lay on your back. Your eyes are closed and he wonders briefly what you could be dreaming about before deciding to take his mind off such things.
"A lady that can shoot a man, can't beat around the bushes, and a looker to boot..." Mingi said the words slowly, as if trying to digest the fact. "Who would've thought?"
Yunho thinks back on his experiences with women, from the social butterflies at parties to the women who had gone starry eyed and then fallen to their knees in front of him, pleading. But you were different. You weren't a proper lady or a demure creature that existed to keep the men's hearts aflutter and their imaginations afire, which wasn't uncommon.
If he's honest, he much prefers your company. While he is a gentleman to the core, he doesn't know what exactly he likes best about you. Yunho ponders a bit more. He considers a lot of things before his friend elbows him and his attention shifts back to the real world.
"She's something, alright. One hell of a woman, is all," he responded quietly. He's also very much attracted to you and he'd love nothing more than to charm you. That would definitely take the cake for the grandest adventure of them all.
Mingi sighs.
Both the men hunker down in their spots, curling together for warmth as the cool mountain air blows through. The scent of grass and fresh air blows past their noses as they doze off to sleep.
It's been an awfully long day.
After all, everyone was snoring the night away.
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When Mingi stirs awake, there's a good number of the gang up and preparing to get moving. Breakfast is hot, and with a sweet note, the outlaws treat their two hostages with kindness. After all, you had warned everyone before you went to sleep the previous night: anyone who threatened either hostage would find themselves in hot water. And you weren't kidding when you meant it.
You saddled the horses and each rider got ready. Yunho and Mingi were settled in the wagon as the riders surrounded the cart. Today was another long trip, but you can see the excitement in their eyes, especially the hostages who seemed curious and wondering when the ride would finally come to an end.
"You got a destination in mind?" Yunho calls out suddenly. He doesn't know why he decides to break the silence, but your face says it all when he sees you look at him and roll your eyes.
"Now why would I tell you that?" You snorted. "After all, there would be no real reason for either of you to know where we're heading."
"If we're just baggage, then I don't see the point of you hiding the fact," Mingi shrugged. "We'll find out once the days out."
"There's the next town westward where I'm planning on getting to sooner than later. Besides, what kind of bandits would we be if we revealed our hideouts?" You explain, keeping a watchful eye.
Mingi shrugs and makes an innocent expression. "No idea. You'd have to be real dumb for that. Guess not."
"Just hush up and behave. You two won't get hurt so long as we move along," you keep the wagon moving and ignore the quips and questions they throw.
Once at the gates of the town, a couple of the bandits lead the way. Wooyoung, San, Jongho, and Yeosang line up along the streets as the few people in town waved at you.
"Y/N! You're back!"
"Yay! They're back!"
Children giggled and waved their hands with happy smiles on their lips as they jumped. "Hello!"
You laugh softly when a couple of small children rush up to see their uncles. Each member happily interacts and takes the time to see the small children that had grown since the last time you all were in this part. You smile and pat the children on the back as you watch everyone settle into town.
"For an outlaw, she seems very loved by the townsfolk and children," Mingi muttered to Yunho.
Hongjoong hears this and raises an eyebrow. "She's not as bad as you two think."
"He's right, we don't follow her because she threatens our families. None of us are family here," Seonghwa cuts in, pointing at the men, women, and children around him and back in your direction. "These people...they are family. This is home. She takes care of them, protects them."
Yunho purses his lips, waiting for more, but Hongjoong continues, "Before all this, we had no place to call home. Y/N took us in, helped all of us find somewhere we could belong. Even if we wanted to leave, she wouldn't force us to stay, we'd be allowed to go. She won't shoot you and leave you out to die. But we're a family."
Jongho sighed, watching a small child giggling at you as she clung to your leg, "As an orphan, and someone who grew up without a family, seeing a home and a family like this? It gives me a reason for hope in a world full of strife and destruction, but when you meet a person like her..."
Yeosang hummed in agreement. "A woman that has such a strong love for children, and looks out for them as if they were her own? That alone is precious. But even then...that's not the main reason we follow her."
San nodded. "Sure she robs trains and banks...but all that money and gold she steals? It's not for her own use. She's done nothing for herself and gave us a new start in life."
Wooyoung lets out a sigh. "It's for these people. It's the children...we protect them because they have no one. For the women whose men go off and die on a battlefield, they have a way to live. For the men who can't work, can't find jobs and are struggling...for the elders whose children no longer can provide for them, or the people who have no one? They're everything."
"Y/N is a good woman," Seonghwa smiled. "We wouldn't leave her, just as she would never leave us either."
Mingi and Yunho exchanged a look as they turned to you. This revelation had surprised them and both decided to wait and see, for if what they heard is true, perhaps they had judged you a bit too rashly.
A child ran towards the wagon and peered up at them before looking at Wooyoung. "Who are they, Uncle Woo?"
"These guys are Yunho and Mingi, little ones," you came up, stroking the kids' head gently and the child cooed with joy.
"They look funny," another added as Mingi grinned at the kid. Yunho simply chuckled in amusement.
A few children crowded the wagon, wanting to see the strangers. You put them at ease, saying a few friendly words. Mingi reached forward to tickle one.
"He's pretty," one of the little girls pointed at Mingi and giggled.
You couldn't help but laugh. "He is, isn't he?"
One of the boys looked up at Yunho. "He's like a giant, Y/N!"
A second boy clapped. "Giant man!"
You smile widely. "Don't be so mean now. Come on, everyone."
The children jump and dance as they walk after you, chanting the phrase and a group of men soon join them. It was a rather humorous thing, having kids chanting 'giant man', to see Yunho so embarrassed. Mingi held a big smile as you listened to the children.
“Where did you pick them up?” a child asked curiously.
“Is one of them going to be your husband, Y/N?” a child asked innocently.
“No!” another child declared, “I think they're going to be like the other uncles!”
The children are merciless and relentless. Their teasing was making you laugh out loud and in return, that brought a blush to Mingi and Yunho's cheeks. A couple of kids gathered near Wooyoung. He glanced down before smiling.
"They really like their uncles," Mingi pointed.
Yunho smiled as he leaned back. "Look at that smile."
The outlaws were taken away with all the people and their families, greeting them with waves and smiles as a celebration appeared to be prepared for the whole afternoon and evening. You looked over to your hostages as a grin overtook your lips. "How would you fellas feel about enjoying a drink with me? You both could join the fun while we get ourselves set."
"Well we've come all this way..." Mingi murmured before a smirk found its way to his lips. "Why not enjoy ourselves a bit?"
Yunho nodded along, smiling in turn as he rubbed the back of his neck. "I had a good time."
You patted their shoulder, steering the two to a building. "Then, follow me."
Entering a saloon, Mingi and Yunho glanced around, eyeing the decorum that was inside the room. There are a couple of rooms and a stage that sat at the side of the establishment, a long bar at the opposite side, and in between, there is a seating area where some people sat. The two friends sit down with you at the bar.
A middle aged gentleman who happens to be the owner of the bar sees you and greets you in kind, happy that you came with guests.
"Goodness, and who are the two tall men accompanying you, Y/N?" His gentle eyes are wide, but not in a judgmental way, he seems quite pleasant.
You gesture your hand at the two gentlemen behind you. "This here's Mingi and Yunho, we've run into a bit of a...situation on the road. Decided to bring them in."
The older man hummed and tapped his finger on his cheek, grinning. "Ah, I understand."
Yunho decided to jump into the conversation. "You're very close with the townsfolk."
"Close may be one way to put it," you sigh. "Though...in reality, they're family."
“Family…?” Yunho asked, confused.
“That’s right,” you said. “These folks don’t have much to their name. And if it means using the money from robbing a few trains and banks? To ensure everyone is fed, clothed, and to take care of their loved one’s funerals or needs if it’s too late, it’s worth the price of jail or hanging for the consequences,” you finished firmly.
"Y/N here funded the saloon with business owners when they moved into town, helped the farmstead with the seedlings and labor," the older gentleman added as he cleaned a mug with a cloth. "Even has a doctor working for the people."
Yunho raised a brow, staring at the wooden surface of the bar top in front of him, deep in thought. When his attention shifts to you, he opens his mouth, hoping the question will do well. "I want to understand...so how does this work? No sheriff in sight, people all living this comfortably?"
The old man shakes his head. "No, there's no law man to protect us here...but Y/N and her gang have. We all know that she comes from good money and she could have looked the other way. But she didn't. We're like an oasis for all these folks."
"So they know you're an outlaw?" Yunho asks you.
"What about other cowboys that bother this town?" Mingi wonders.
The bar keeper smiles as he pours you, Mingi, and Yunho a pint of liquor.
"Mostly the town does have good relationships with all the ranchers and cattlemen here," the bartender states. "Of course, we've also met with the wrong people, but there is a small ranch that we've reached a deal with to handle such people should they happen."
You raise your glass towards the man and take a deep breath, exhaling the tension away. "Everyone here knows what I am and don't worry about any other issues coming here. The neighboring ranches tend to mind themselves, but most are on friendly terms with the town so it makes life pretty peaceful."
"Well that's certainly something," Mingi sniffs the mug that had been placed in his hands and shrugs his shoulders. He figured it wouldn't hurt and brought the drink to his lips. "And it's hard to not see why the people adore you. You and your gang are really good people. Never would have pegged you for a villain in a story."
"Did you think I was a villain?" You gave him an amused smile.
"Yeah, kind of. What do you expect? It's not every day that a group of train robbers shows up, scaring the bejesus out of a man like myself, and bringing me, another poor soul into whatever life altering plan they might have, let alone bringing us back to a home full of people, children, and the elderly," Mingi offered, sarcasm heavily dripped in his voice. He rolls his eyes for added measure. "The imagination runs wild in times of panic."
Yunho furrowed his eyebrows. "Well, in our defense, a group of strangers showing up, guns out and all, then ropes our arms up and threatens to kill us should we move the wrong way, does tend to rattle the bones."
"But you're the one who flirted with me, big boy. Should we rehash the details of that whole conversation?" you grinned at him and raised a brow in his direction, wanting a good reaction.
Yunho looked up to the ceiling, gulping the last of his beverage with ease, a handsome blush crossed his features.
You'd always taken to a bit of flirtatious ways, not very reserved, but charming nonetheless. Seeing this rugged and handsome man flush with color from simple flattery, only egged you on further to see what other emotions you could muster from the beautiful and curious man. You had to admit Yunho was more your type of man but Mingi certainly had a very nice personality.
Both were rather attractive in your book.
Mingi pokes fun at Yunho before clearing his throat and nudging him with his elbow. His partner swats him on the arm before turning his attention back to you. "Perhaps another drink would put me at ease."
"In my company, I wouldn't mind at all. It would be an absolute delight," you simper.
The bartender nods and makes two more pints. Once they were placed on the counter, the man gestures a nod in Mingi and Yunho's direction. The two drink once the mugs are near their lips.
"Alright, you lot had me wrong, that was rude on my part," Mingi spoke before raising his mug, signaling his admission of apology. "There are a good lot here."
The older man and you take a drink in solidarity with him.
Yunho shares a genuine smile. "Well, thank you for the peace of mind that we have in our lives for now. Maybe...things could work."
You grin back. "Well, I'm glad to have both of your understanding."
"Is everyone ready for dinner?" Hongjoong shouts, breaking the three's conversation and the crowd cheered in return.
Children scamper away and adults gather outside for dinner. A few people were cooking in front of the bonfire outside the establishment, the women prepared the food as the rest of the gang sat with you.
"Yay, uncle Mingi and uncle Yunho will be able to join us today!" The little girl from earlier happily declared their presence and both men gave her soft smiles.
"Look, she's already calling you uncle." You pointed out.
"Come here, little missy," Mingi knelt down, beckoning the girl over.
You couldn't help the little hiccup in your chest when she came bounding over happily. Her soft plush face had a pink hue across her cheeks and she held a soft look. She really was cute as can be and even though the man before you was the opposite in height and temperament, the sight had you falling fast.
She sat on his lap and leaned back, resting against his large torso as they watched the sky start to brighten up with more orange streaks than red and pink hues. She whispers something in his ear and you couldn't help but see Mingi's cheeks redden. The child leans up to whisper in Yunho's ear and asks him most likely the same question since his cheeks flushed after listening to her as well. You watched as she ran away to throw herself in Yeosang's lap as he played and made faces to make her giggle.
"Well, what did she ask you?" You asked after sitting on the porch between them.
Yunho and Mingi fumbled a bit as they glanced at one another before Yunho began, "Missy wanted to know when we were going to marry you."
You blinked rapidly, caught off guard by the straightforward nature of the question. Mingi couldn't help but look up towards the sky.
Your jaw dropped at the bold question and you tilted your head to the side with interest. "Oh yeah? What did you tell her?"
They glance between one another before Mingi pipes up, "Told her we'd probably marry if you were down to have an arrangement. Not that she needed to know that last part."
The atmosphere changes with the different shades of lights. More reds and darker pinks painted the skies, bright and vivid, mixing to a light orange and gold color that brings a sense of peaceful tranquility to everyone.
You smiled at their answer and laughed at Mingi's last sentence. "Probably be married huh? It's been years since I've thought of marriage. Ever since I ran away."
"What's stopping you?" Yunho asked with a mischievous lilt, clearly feeling himself under your influence of mirth. "There's no real reason not to get married if you and another fancy it."
You purse your lips in thought, playing with the brim of your cowboy hat. "Who would want someone like me? As a bandit, my days are always in danger."
"We might," the taller man spoke without any sort of shame.
“Excuse me?” you scoffed. “Honey, you both couldn't keep up with me, that's no way to start a marriage.”
"Didn't mean to brag but...I'm no weak man," Yunho smirked and leaned close, resting an elbow on his knee.
Your own smile tugged up as a breeze blows past the three of you and ruffles your hair. You reach forward and rest your hand against Yunho's arm and smile softly. "Is that right? Because I like to ride long and hard at night."
Mingi stared wide-eyed at the double meaning while you fluttered your eyelashes.
Yunho sits up with a broad smirk, his smile teasing and gentle in a way he didn't want to stop, enjoying himself, letting himself unravel before your gaze as you invited him in. "Oh darlin'...I wouldn't mind seeing that."
A full grin appears on your face. You stand up slowly, bending towards Yunho with your chin lifted in pride. You meet his eyes, watching with awe when his attention travels across your facial features. A rush of delight flooded your senses with the feel of his heavy, loving gaze on you.
Yunho let his smile grow a touch wild as you ran a hand over his cheek gently before tugging his face by his chin, a silent command to listen closely. Mingi stares, enamored by the atmosphere. "I ride slow, darling, slow and steady. Feeling everything at a pleasant pace."
With an inhale, Yunho leaned further, a fire kindled in his heart with no intention of taming. Just as he did, Mingi leaned his head in your direction, his hand brushing the loose strand away from your eyes and to your ear. He gently tucked it behind and kept his fingers over your skin, warm and soft under his caress.
The sensuality of the moment lulls. Mingi and you stare at each other, observing the hunger brewing within your shared gaze and you press a hand over his lips to signal his end, waiting until you receive an answer from your last statement to Yunho. The large cowboy took a deep breath in and brought his cheek to the back of your fingers, placing a tender kiss to your skin before pulling back to observe.
With a playful nip to your fingertips, Yunho mumbled, his low, velvety tenor caused heat to pool in your stomach. "I hear what you're saying, sweetheart."
The brush of a finger to the back of your neck and you can see how Mingi was looking at you, the shine to his brown eyes reflecting the gold and orange lights as you stare and drop your hand back down to your side. Your hand naturally presses along Yunho's shoulder and takes hold of Mingi's sleeve with a subtle tug that beckons their closeness.
"Shame," you mutter as you grip their collars to pull the pair towards the entrance to the saloon.
Mingi leaned to your side with his face pressed against your ear. The heat and deep voice sent a shiver down your body. You can feel the way the gentle weight of Yunho's chest pressed against yours when he whispered, "Don't you want to see where the three of us can lead to?"
You let out a small laugh, your hand cupping his cheek. "Not tonight boys, not just yet."
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You watched as Yunho and Mingi happily played with the children, sharing stories from back home, telling tall tales, and entertaining the small community of misfits. Their infectious and open nature charmed all those around. It brought a sense of whimsical air that you didn't have a chance to breathe often, to just allow yourself a moment to relish in the simplicity of laughter and peace.
It was soothing.
"They seem to be fitting in well," Seonghwa offered his greeting after walking towards where you stood on the porch to the saloon. "The children seem to love them. And the adults too. I'd say it's because they bring new energy and energy for such folks is much appreciated."
"New stories. New tales," you added.
"Oh? Have you taken a liking to the hostages?" Hongjoong chuckles as he hands the two of you a mug with drink. He knows exactly the situation as it played out. He doesn't have anything but fondness in his eyes, seeing how fond you've become with the two of them and you shrugged.
"Maybe. Maybe they'll leave someday and I'll just miss the company of a handsome fellow. You can never have enough," you muse out loud. Hongjoong let his brow rise at you but couldn't hold back a teasing grin. He bumped shoulders, earning a hum of contemplation.
"Look, you know damn well you're the boss and none of us would stand between you and whatever makes you happy," Seonghwa answers. "But two businessmen? Y/N, they're from well-respected families and I'm sure men like them would want well-respected ladies."
"I know, Hwa," you huffed. "But I used to be one of those well-respected ladies. And you both were once those well-respectable gentlemen. Things change."
"Do you miss home, Y/N?" Seonghwa's question cut straight to the bone, digging into your chest in a way you hadn't considered. He notices it and so does Hongjoong who tried his best to let you come to a resolution yourself.
"No," you muttered, eyes never leaving the town, the lively noises, and the scent of cooked meat and sweets filling the atmosphere. "This is our home. These people need us and we wouldn't ever abandon them."
Hongjoong gulped down his mug, set it down, and leaned on the post, staring into the sky before continuing his line of thought. "Y/N. No matter who we are, and who they were...I know neither of us can go back and none of us should ever try and go back. We can only live right now. So, does it really matter? You've been with other cowboys before...surely rich boys aren't much of a different kind of challenge."
Seonghwa rolled his eyes. "I just don't want you getting hurt."
"It'll take a lot to hurt me, Hwa," you smiled at him. "But thank you for looking out for me."
Yunho and Mingi gaze in your direction and share a curious expression. One with a pink hue adorning the apples of his cheeks and the other with a hand scratching the back of his neck. They notice the stares directed towards them and share a shy, tiny smile with one another.
"But maybe this time, I don't mind taking a risk or two," you added as a sigh, a tiny sigh slipped past your lips, accompanied by a rosy pink that tinted your cheekbones. The edges of your lips curved up in the slightest to form a small and amused smile at the two.
"Taking a risk, huh?" Hongjoong mused, following your gaze to Yunho and Mingi. "Well, can't say I blame you. They do seem like decent fellas."
You hummed in agreement, watching as Yunho lifted a small boy onto his shoulders while Mingi dramatically acted out a story for the other children. Their laughter rang out across the town square.
"Decent indeed," you murmured. 
As the sun began to set, casting a warm golden glow over the town, you found yourself drawn to where Yunho and Mingi were still entertaining the children. Their infectious laughter and easy smiles had captivated not just the little ones, but many of the adults as well. 
You approached just as Mingi was wrapping up an elaborate tale, complete with exaggerated gestures that had the kids in stitches. Yunho caught your eye and gave you a warm smile that made your heart skip a beat.
"Alright kiddos, I think it's about time we let these fine gentlemen get some rest," you announced, chuckling at the chorus of disappointed groans. 
"But Y/N, can't they stay up a little longer?" one of the young girls pleaded, tugging on your sleeve.
"Now, now, don't you worry. I'm sure Mr. Yunho and Mr. Mingi will be happy to tell you more stories tomorrow," you said, ruffling the little girl's hair affectionately. "But for now, it's time for bed."
With a few more grumbles and pouts, the children reluctantly said their goodnights and scampered off to their homes. You turned to Yunho and Mingi, who were both looking a bit worn out but still smiling.
"You two certainly have a way with kids," you remarked. "I haven't seen them this excited in ages."
Yunho chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. "They're great kids. Reminds me of home a bit."
"Got some little ones waiting for you back East?" you asked, trying to keep your tone casual.
"Oh no," Yunho clarified quickly. "Just some younger cousins and neighbors' kids I used to look after sometimes. No little ones of my own."
You felt a small sense of relief at that, though you tried not to examine why too closely. "What about you, Mingi? Any family waiting on you?"
Mingi shook his head. "Nah, it's just been me and Yunho for a while now. We came out West to start fresh, make our own way."
"And instead you got kidnapped by a gang of outlaws," you said with a wry smile. "Not quite the fresh start you were hoping for, I imagine."
Yunho and Mingi exchanged a look, then Yunho spoke up. "You know, it hasn't been all bad. This place, these people... it's not what we expected, but there's something special here," Yunho said thoughtfully. "I can see why you care for them so much."
You felt a warmth bloom in your chest at his words. "They're good people who've been dealt a tough hand. They deserve better than what this world's given them."
"And you've made it your mission to provide that," Mingi observed. "It's admirable, really."
You shrugged, feeling a bit self-conscious under their earnest gazes. "I do what I can. It's not always pretty or legal, but..."
"But it's necessary," Yunho finished for you. "We get it. Or at least, we're starting to."
A comfortable silence fell between the three of you as you watched the last rays of sunlight fade from the sky. You looked at them curiously. “How was your first night sleeping in town? The rooms above the saloon, okay?”
Mingi nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. "It was comfortable, thank you. Certainly beats sleeping on the hard ground or in the back of a wagon."
"Though I must admit, I did miss the stars," Yunho added with a chuckle. "There's something about sleeping under that big open sky that's hard to beat."
You couldn't help but smile at that. "I know what you mean. Even after all this time, I still prefer a bedroll under the stars to a proper bed most nights."
"Is that why you're out here instead of tucked away at your house?" Mingi asked, his tone teasing but his eyes warm.
You shrugged, feeling a bit exposed under their gazes. "Old habits die hard, I suppose. Plus, someone's got to keep an eye on things."
"Always the protector," Yunho murmured, his voice soft with admiration.
You felt a flush creep up your neck at his words and the intensity of his gaze. Clearing your throat, you gestured towards the saloon. "Well, it's getting late. We should probably turn in for the night."
As you started to walk away, Mingi called out, "Y/N, wait."
You turned back, raising an eyebrow questioningly. 
Mingi and Yunho exchanged a look before Mingi continued, "We've been talking, and... well, we were wondering if maybe we could stick around for a while. Help out around town, you know?"
Your heart skipped a beat at his words, but you kept your expression neutral. "Oh? And what brought this on? I thought you two were eager to start your new lives out West."
Yunho stepped forward, his expression earnest. "We were, but...this place, these people. It's opened our eyes to something we didn't expect to find out here. There's real community here, real purpose. And if we can help in some small way, well, that seems like a better use of our time than chasing after some vague dream of striking it rich."
You studied them both carefully, searching for any sign of deception. But all you saw was sincerity in their eyes. Still, you couldn't help but be cautious. "And what about your families back East? Your old lives? You'd be giving up a lot to throw your lot in with a bunch of outlaws."
Mingi shrugged, a wry smile on his face. "To be honest, there wasn't much holding us there anyway. That's why we came West in the first place. To find something more."
You studied them carefully, taking in their earnest expressions. Part of you wanted to believe them, to welcome them into the fold without hesitation. But years of living on the edge had taught you to be cautious, especially when it came to matters of the heart.
"And you think you've found that 'something more' here?" you asked, keeping your tone neutral. "With a gang of outlaws and a town full of misfits?"
Yunho's eyes softened as he gazed at you. "We've found more here in a few days than we did in years back East. There's a real sense of purpose, of family. It may not be conventional, but it feels right."
Mingi nodded in agreement. "Plus," he added with a playful smirk, "the company's not bad either."
You felt a blush creep up your neck at his words, but you pushed it down, maintaining your composure. "Well, I appreciate the sentiment, boys. But this isn't an easy life. It's dangerous, unpredictable. Are you sure you're ready for that?"
Yunho stepped closer, his eyes locked on yours. "You left the life of comfort, the life of a respected lady to be an outlaw. Surely there must've been moments where you didn't want this life, times where you were scared. But you didn't allow it to get in your way."
Mingi puffed his chest confidently and grinned. "If you could leave that life, then we can too."
"You're right," you said softly, meeting Yunho's intense gaze. "I did leave that life behind. And it wasn't easy. But I've never regretted it, not for a moment."
You paused, looking between Yunho and Mingi. Their earnest expressions tugged at something deep in your chest. 
"This life... it's not for everyone," you continued. "It's hard, and dangerous, and there are days when I wonder if I'm doing the right thing. But then I look at these people, this town we've built together and I know it's worth it."
Yunho stepped forward, his eyes shining with determination. "We want to be part of that. We want to help, in whatever way we can."
Mingi scratched the back of his neck sheepishly, "I'm not as strong as you or the rest of your gang. I wouldn't survive as an outlaw. But I could use my skills as a businessman to help this town."
"And I, at the very least, know how to shoot," Yunho added with a determined tone to his voice. "So I can help protect the town when you and your gang aren't here."
You studied them both carefully, weighing their words against your own instincts. Finally, you nodded slowly.
"Okay," you said softly. "But if you're going to stay here, if you're going to become part of this life, I need your word. You'll put the needs of this community ahead of your own. You'll lay your life on the line to protect it, to protect the people who call it home."
Yunho stepped forward, his hand brushing against yours, a spark shooting up your arm at the touch. "I swear. Mingi and I, we've been looking for this place, this feeling... and we aren't letting it slip away."
Mingi licks his lips and looks up with wide, sincere eyes. "I swear as well. I'll protect this town with my last breath if I have to."
His sincerity surprises you. You stand tall and let them come a few steps closer before you move again. This time, you choose to face them and hold their attention. Mingi and Yunho both take deep breaths and widen their gaze as you slowly grab their wrist to check their pulses. The pound and heat rising off them surprises you a little. You smile at them in assurance as you reach to them again to brush a touch over each of their chests. It's hard not to feel the rise and fall as they take slow, deep breaths. "Welcome home."
"Thank you," Yunho says softly.
"I'll let the others know our guests have decided to settle in," you said, noting how the heat from their skin remains long after you move. "You both obviously need a permanent place to stay...unless..."
The slight inflection, the bit of heat in your voice, causes their pupils to dilate a bit.
"Yes?" Mingi murmurs.
"Unless...you'd be open to living with me?" Your heart is hammering. You've been so used to a rough kind of touch that anything a bit soft makes you almost...relaxed.
"Live," Yunho starts. "...with you?"
You can't hold their gaze anymore, eyes shyly trailing off as you laugh to ease the situation. It sounds breathy and unsure, like your body is too full of excitement to allow any of your normal confidence out.
"I mean if not, no big deal!" You assured, letting go of their arms and backing away to create space between you. "If you're happy with a room at the saloo‒"
"No!" Mingi grabs at your wrist, not roughly or meanly, but firmly enough that it gives your stomach a light flutter. His eyes are wide. "I don't. I'm not happy with the room. I like... I like what's on offer here."
You lick your dry bottom lip. "...Yeah?"
He's blushing. Blushing for you. For the first time, his gaze drifts down your front and back to your face. "...yeah. I'm more interested in the lady giving the offer, anyhow."
"Thank you, pretty boy," you manage a low rumble of a chuckle before turning to Yunho. "And you? What do you think, big boy?"
Yunho holds your gaze for a long moment, his dark eyes studying you carefully. He's silent for so long that you start to think he's not going to respond, when suddenly, a smile breaks across his face, warm and genuine and absolutely captivating.
"Yeah," he murmurs softly. "I'd be open to sharing that sort of life with you."
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The months began to pass slowly. At times it seemed endless but Hongjoong said that winter would surely roll around soon. At least, you hoped it would. Living in a desert was brutal and hard. But you and your gang made sure to stock up the necessities for the townsfolk in case they were to suffer a shortage. You didn't want anybody dying or suffering at the hand of a lack of resources. Not on your watch.
After striking another deal with the ranchers and the cattlemen to help feed the people in exchange for protection, you'd successfully purchased several extra wagons with livestock, food and medicine. In return, the merchants of the town helped repair damaged furniture or clothing from the group. Some made trinkets and food out of the donations from others in the nearby city.
Yunho sat on the steps of the general store while you stood by his side. It had been a particularly busy week getting the money. You'd raided an abandoned train car with bags full of bills and cash that prior bandits left behind. Most of the money was safe and stored up in the old mine, along with other valuables. You knew you were playing a dangerous game, but it was worth it for those in need.
The more the town gained, the less they had to live from day to day. There were more houses being built and trade routes coming in to make the town richer in one way or another. It wasn't perfect but it was a step in the right direction. You'd done the impossible. You'd changed lives.
"You think we should go good at some point?" Yunho asked, rolling the brim of his hat back. "Become some lawmen for our people?"
"Maybe," you mused. "If that's what they need from us. Then yes, maybe we should give it a try."
He hummed. "Imagine if you and the others turned good."
"Hey, the guys would make excellent sheriffs and deputies," you nudged his shoulder with your arm as he laughed.
Mingi emerged from the building to join you two, taking his hat off and waving it to get the sweat off his brow. "Hotter than blazes."
"Stay cool, pretty boy," you patted his cheek. "Don't need you burning up."
"Too late," he countered. "I've been burning from you this whole time."
You snort. "Keep that talk for the bedroom, cowboy."
His smile stretched wider. "Deal."
As time passed, your relationships changed. While nothing official was announced, the whole town seemed to understand what was happening as Yunho and Mingi started to live with you in your homestead. They'd ask about the supplies, what the people needed, and they'd help bring in shipments whenever they could. They both quickly made friends among the townsfolk, and were eager to prove their worth. It made you feel a swell of pride and love to see them fitting in, belonging. They felt a sense of community and it was obvious in the way they held themselves, their posture loosened. The rigidity in their expressions became relaxed and they didn't have to glance at the exits to ensure an exit route. 
This was their home.
Both boys kept your bed nice and warm every night, and spent most days working in the fields, repairing buildings, fixing and patching clothes. Mingi was more adept with numbers and working out trade, Yunho was more in the line of law and justice.
Mingi would write a letter here and there to their extended families back east. Their families seemed thrilled they finally found stability in such a remote area, having lived an extravagant life before and leaving for the opportunity. They hadn't told them the truth, so they hadn't told them you were wanted, dangerous criminals. In their words, you were a town hero and were settling down from your rowdy youth. Which, from what you understood, wasn't too far off the truth, so you just played along. You tried to focus on the positives in life, not the negatives. It was healthy that way.
"What are you thinking about, love?" Yunho asked one night. His broad hands grabbed onto your thighs, gently pulling them apart.
Mingi rested on the pillow and bit his bottom lip as he watched you squirm at Yunho's soft teasing.
You swallow.
"Just...thinking," your face feels hot and you groan softly. "Keep...please..."
Yunho's large hands trailed along the inside of your bare thighs and goosebumps erupted along your skin. His fingers ran in lazy circles around the junction of where your thigh ended and where you really wanted him, tracing maddening paths closer, but not close enough. Your breath hitched as his fingers grazed the sensitive skin and a low, desperate whimper escaped.
Mingi shifted beside you, his large hand caressing the side of your head to watch the way you fell apart between them.
"Look at you," Yunho hums. "Aching for me. For us. Falling to pieces and I haven't even done anything yet."
You open your mouth to protest but it comes out as an undignified moan as his fingers make contact. Yunho chuckled and slipped the tip of a single finger past the tight, wet heat of your entrance, drawing another desperate sound from your lips as he pushed into you and gave you more.
“Think we can make you lose your mind, Y/N?” Yunho asked, a sly smirk playing on his lips.
You struggle to find an answer but all thought flees when another finger enters and scissors you open with a stretch. The way his thumb makes circles near your clit while he does it is agonizing.
You move your hips to get him deeper but he moves to keep the same pattern. Slow, soft strokes with his fingers, enough to drive you insane, and just far enough to deny your orgasm. It was hell, pure torture. Your legs quivered in effort, the build up within growing and growing.
"Y/N, can you be good for us and wait?" Mingi coos to your ear. "Let him enjoy you."
Yunho curls his fingers and begins a slow thrust into you. You're so turned on and desperate, it's almost embarrassing but fuck it, you love this. "So wet," Yunho hums to Mingi. "Just for us."
Mingi hums, hands coming to squeeze at your waist. "We love hearing your cute sounds," he rolls a nipple and presses kisses to your neck. "Let us hear you."
A whimper fell from your lips as your back arched, and you could see the way your stomach dipped at the action.
"I want to see you riding my fingers," Yunho says and grips at the underside of your ass, gently guiding your hips. "I know you've got a nice ass, let me see you use it."
"This isn't a good look for me," You shake your head a little bit, attempting to ignore the heat between your legs as Mingi trails kisses across your shoulder. "Like, not a good angle."
Mingi kissed you deeply, swallowing your moans as Yunho slowly guided you up and down onto his fingers and started a more feverish pace. The sounds were embarrassing. You whined, muffled into Mingi's mouth. He nipped at your lip and tongue, coaxing more from you as your hands clung to his hair.
"No one is here, love," Yunho mutters. "You can make all the pretty noises you want. It's just us here."
"Better hope no one...oh fuck, right there," you gasp.
They both grinned and Yunho stroked faster, your pants grew harder and more unhinged. You were desperate for more, legs quivering. He knew what he was doing with those long, pretty fingers of his, working into you and finding all the right places to drive you insane.
"So wet and ready," Yunho muttered, nipping your thigh and adding a third finger that had your mind swirling. "Do you feel good?"
"Yes!" You practically howled and gripped at Mingi. "Please..."
Mingi nuzzles your jaw and shushes you softly. "Tell him what you need, baby."
You rolled your hips to feel his fingers sink in deeper, each grind drawing out an embarrassing, desperate noise.
"So dirty, the way she's fucking herself," Mingi groans, low and hungry as he squeezes the curves of your waist.
Yunho spreads his fingers inside, opening you up, filling you with each thrust. His gaze is heated and full of dark amusement, taking in your writhing form.
You are so lost in the sensation, lost in the feeling of your blood flowing and moving with each steady thrust, but then he pulls out of you with a smirk and brings his fingers to his mouth with a long drag, licking his fingers clean.
"Can never let a meal go unfinished," he murmured and sank back on his elbows. "All of her." 
He nuzzled his nose against the sensitive skin of your cunt, letting the sensation send sparks up your body, before languidly licking at your folds, his tongue parting you. He moved your legs to rest on his shoulder, allowing better access, and went to work cleaning you. The sudden intensity made you yelp, and as his tongue lavished the folds you became even louder. He added his hands into play and spread you apart with two long fingers, sucking the juices leaking.
You almost feel bad when his face gets absolutely drenched when he really starts going to town, making filthy slurping and sucking sounds that drown out the squelch of his tongue sliding between you. When he closes his eyes in delight and growls with pleasure, you're amazed by how hard it all gets him.
He's literally making the filthiest sounds, getting your arousal and your pussy all over his mouth and jaw, and he loves every minute of it.
"That's so hot," Mingi groans, rubbing his cock. "Baby, can you suck me off while he eats you out? Pretty please?"
He doesn't have to beg much as you take his cock into your hands, pumping him a few times to hear the low groans he lets out. Leaning forward, you suck him deep. He slides down your throat to the base, gagging you. Mingi is just the right size that you can swallow him entirely to the base. His tip tickles the back of your throat and his thighs quiver with every long lick.
The moment his tip touches the back of your throat is the moment his thighs twitch, and you love it. It makes you hungrier.
The feel of his heavy dick, throbbing on your tongue is exhilarating. You never think you'll have enough of him, his thick length and the taste, god, the taste of him always has you wanting more. More.
Yunho can't get enough of the sounds and has a hand gripping the flesh of your hip with bruising pressure as he continues devouring your pussy, tasting every inch. You're squeezing his face with your legs, fucking into his mouth, and Mingi's hands are woven into the hair on the sides of your head and he's now thrusting up to fuck your throat as you go slack, and you could melt completely and be content forever right here between them.
Suddenly Mingi hisses out your name and fucks into the wet warmth of your mouth a few last times, until he can't hold back anymore. He makes a wrecked sound and holds the base of his cock as he's cumming in your mouth, hot and tangy spurts shooting down your throat. It's been a long week, and the sight and feel of him using you like his own personal little cum bucket is the best way to end it, and he moans out your name and sends a happy tingling spark of electricity down your spine. You'd live like this, choking on his cum if you could.
Once he's spent, Mingi helps your head up, his body glistening with sweat from the high, his stomach muscles clenching, and your legs shaking. Mingi has you look at him, taking the messy sheen around your lips and dragging his tongue up to lick into your mouth, cleaning you. It's a sloppy, wet, messy kiss that ends with your stomach tight with pleasure and your muscles aching, and Yunho still has his head between your legs and is making a mess and the most obscene, filthy, wet sounds. The sight of you and Mingi kissing turns him on something fierce, and suddenly, the need for his release overwhelms him.
"Fuck, baby. I need to be in you," Yunho sits upright and drags his mouth up along the underside of your calf, sinking his teeth into the plush of your calf muscles, leaving angry red bite marks in his wake.
"Please," is all you can manage. Your legs are burning from holding themselves apart for his assault, and he is so fucking good at everything he does.
Yunho wipes his glistening, pink stained mouth with a grin, "How do you want me?"
"O-on your back," your throat feels dry and rough.
Yunho licks the leftover taste of you, looking absolutely devious. "Oh? Got some ideas?"
You're already moving to sit atop his thighs, guiding his stiff length along the wet entrance and teasing your clit. He bites his bottom lip and lays back with an appreciative groan. You don't hesitate to take what you need from him, sinking down and pressing him all the way in. Both of you groan at the way his cock throbs and stretches you.
"Need to ride this big boy," you purred. You pressed your hands into his chest and started grinding yourself on him, slow and easy. "Oh fuck, it feels so good."
Mingi rubs his own length to hardness, biting his lower lip as you start a rhythmic movement. He swoops in and presses kisses all across your shoulder blades, muttering softly, his words swallowed by the creak of the bed and Yunho's little gasps, "Love you like this. Fucking yourself on his dick."
It's hot to watch, and it has the two of you swapping a lewd, messy kiss. Your pace is frantic, hands kneading at his toned stomach, desperate for purchase. Yunho grabs hold of your thighs, bouncing you along his thick length. The sounds that escape you are dirty. Wet noises fill the air as he fills you up repeatedly.
"I think Mingi wants to be in you too, love," Yunho's dark eyes glint, and he pants. His handsome face is sweaty, but he doesn't stop thrusting himself up, sinking deeper. "Wouldn't that be good?"
"Yes..." you moaned. You reached out and gripped your asscheeks, spreading yourself wider. "Want to feel you both."
Mingi felt up the soft curve of your ass, appreciating you. His touch trailed, callused hands along the path of your spine and back, gentle. You couldn't help the excited smile on your face as his touch roamed, eyes glowing with love.
Then, Yunho lifted his legs up and sat himself more properly on the bed to watch Mingi position himself. You stopped rolling your hips, waiting for him with baited breath.
Yunho bent his knees, holding you close to his chest so you could enjoy his heartbeat as Mingi began sliding himself in your puckered hole.
"Shit..." Mingi hissed between his teeth.
"Fuck, Mingi," you cursed and buried your face into Yunho's shoulder as he held you up easily by the thighs, angling himself as Mingi pushed all the way in with a shaky, labored breath. The both of you remained motionless, waiting to let your bodies adjust to being so impossibly full.
"Just breathe, sweetheart," Yunho's lips flutter to your shoulder with tenderness and he groans as you shift. The first little roll of his hips is so teasing it drives you mad. He slides slowly back and then fills you again, and then he's rocking up into you at a delicious pace, and it feels so good it's got you whimpering. Mingi matches Yunho's movements and sets the same pace, keeping up a delicious rhythm.
"So, so good. Good girl," Yunho whispers into your ear. His voice was guttural and rich, his breath hitting your hot skin and sending electric waves throughout your body. "Such a good girl taking both of us."
Both are filling you so nicely. Each thrust pushes the breath from your lungs, has you desperately seeking him out again. When they're fucking you like this, there is no reason in the world other than their cocks slamming into you over and over. It feels heavenly; the both of them inside you, together. They fuck you so deep and good it has you squirming, not caring about the way you're drooling and clenching around both lengths, enjoying the stretch. Your legs feel like jelly as their hands roam, playing and exploring, worshiping.
It feels like a blissful eternity filled with nothing but the feel of their skin against yours.
Mingi's tongue trails along the side of your neck, humming with affection and breathlessness. His hands clutch you tightly, possessive, while he's pounding up into you, fucking himself closer to completion. "Fuck, let's switch. My knees are...shit...going..."
Mingi is flipped onto the bed now and you're riding him, just as he had suggested earlier. A grin is etched on his lips, his expression one of lazy bliss as his thumbs caress the sides of your waist. "Ready?"
"Oh yes please," Yunho answers, raring to go. He enters slowly from behind, causing Mingi to grunt and cling to you tighter. "Damn, Mingi stretched you out nice and good baby. Love how she feels."
Your walls convulse and grip them, a loud cry spilling as Mingi moans at the feel of you and Yunho groans, clutching the soft flesh of your rear. Mingi leans back against the wooden headrest, allowing you to fall into him and grip his shoulders. You moan into his mouth, and the kisses become filthy. You're utterly trapped and full and loving the pressure.
They thrust in alternates. One pushes while the other pulls out, and soon you can barely differentiate between them. Just full and full and full. And then you're gasping and moaning and practically fucking screaming their names, not caring in the slightest about the world around you.
"You okay, baby?" Mingi presses kisses against your hairline, fingers smoothing away the droplets of sweat gathering at the nape of your neck. "You can take a break."
"Never...no...no breaks," you gasp out. "Feels so damn good."
Yunho watches intently with half-hooded eyes, fingers digging into the flesh of your cheeks to keep you apart and spread wide. The rhythm picks up faster, harder and it sends shock waves. Your toes curl. Mingi is sucking, laving, biting at every inch of skin he can get access to, leaving dark marks wherever his mouth touches, hands caressing your back with fondness.
It's so hot, everything from the wet sounds coming from below to the soft whimpers you can't help. It's messy and frenzied. Yunho is pounding into you while you roll your hips frantically against Mingi, feeling the hot pulsating sensations inside, desperate to have both inside as much and as deep as they can. It's electrifying, having Yunho pound up while Mingi pounds into you, a contrast between soft and deep, filling you up until all you can think of are their throbbing lengths and how much your body aches for them.
"Does Mingi feel good?" Yunho's lips nip at your shoulder blade, breath ghosting, tickling you. "His fat cock stuffed in you like that?"
"I‒" your mind is swimming, lips parted and dripping with the pleasure they're wrangling.
"You take us so well," Yunho groaned and increased the intensity, rocking himself into you. You can't speak coherently at the moment with their dicks in you, all you can do is whimper and mewl as you hold onto the last vestiges of your control. Their thrusts get you going, making your tummy light and buzzy. They fill you and the slide is slick with how soaked you are, making their thrusts all the more satisfying.
Their deep groans vibrate. Skin is on skin as their hips connect with a sinful smacking sound, and they fuck up into you and you're starting to shake and Mingi's warm arms and his smile, the way he sucks your bottom lip, his smell, Yunho's grunts, his low murmurs and the way his hands are so good at supporting you and taking care of you, how deep he can thrust—
The heat that washes over you as they cum together is sinfully exhilarating. Warm bursts fill you from both sides. Yunho burrows himself so deep, his hot cum gushing into you, and it fills you up until you're both dripping onto the sheets.
Your head is tucked in the crook of Mingi's throat, sucking on his collarbone when the feeling washes over. A lazy warmth crawls through your body and has you sagging, the pleasure having wrung your muscles dry. The wetness and fullness make the rest of your orgasm a happy mess, and you cry their names over and over, letting your muscles twitch and shiver, and the sensations are a gentle current rocking you and rippling through, washing all stress and thought from your mind.
This, right now, this is all that matters, you think. 
This was all that mattered. Them.
Mingi pulls out with a shaky, breathless exhale and cradles you against him, the cum oozing down and leaking onto the blankets. You've ruined yet another set of sheets.
Yunho gives your pouty lips a long, deep kiss as his body settles beside Mingi's and you. The taste and feel of the kiss is what grounds you. As your racing pulse finally starts to settle down, Yunho looks as if he wants to say something. His features are sharp in the shadows of the lamplight, the orange glow emphasizing the sharp angles of his face.
He's absolutely gorgeous. And so is Mingi, who brushes the sweat-dampened strands off your cheeks and presses sweet, sloppy little smooches and praise all over your temple and cheeks, his smile infectious. They're both so stunning. It leaves your heart beating faster. You want to cup and memorize the plush curves and contours of Mingi's and Yunho's cheeks.
You're a sight to behold, heaped in between both men. It should have felt embarrassing and disgusting to be a mess of a human, lying limply amongst the filth, but the warmth they share leaves you comfortably and fully content. Their hair is disheveled and their sweaty bodies glisten, and they have not a care in the world but to take care of you. Yunho and Mingi whisper words of admiration and praise as their callused, weathered palms and hands rub circles into your thighs. The throb of afterglow has you almost purring in relief.
The moment you try sitting up though, your legs shake and cramp up. You fall with an unceremonious huff back onto the sheets. Mingi laughs loudly and Yunho can't help but snort. He's instantly up to get a cup of water.
"Don't push yourself so hard, sweetheart. Let's get you washed," Mingi peppers little kisses along your cheekbones, voice a little rough as he reaches out and accepts the warm cloth and wash basin from Yunho, getting you cleaned.
"Fuck," your throat feels so parched, it comes out scratchy and hoarse.
Yunho comes in close, kissing you on the lips, chaste and affectionate, "C'mon. Time to rest."
Mingi chuckles in your ear and eases you backwards onto the pillows, getting rid of the dirtied and tousled blankets and stuffing fresh, clean sheets underneath your tired body. Mingi hums and carefully combs away the curls from your eyes, watching you as your vision blurs and softens, sinking into the soft sheets.
"What's got you thinkin' so hard?" Yunho whispered, his fingertips tracing patterns across the sensitive skin of your hip, bringing his other arm around to pull you close, foreheads resting together. "Hm?"
"Nothing," you nuzzle against the cool curve of his neck, burying your face where his pulse is hammering. It calms you down. Yunho's heartbeat. Mingi's light, soft breathing as he starts to drift asleep. Everything is blissful. "Just happy. Really happy. Just how perfect this moment feels."
"Me too," Yunho hums, his voice sleepy and soft and deep as he hugs your waist. Mingi is hugging your torso from behind and the warmth makes you giggle a little with how safe and cozy you feel in their embrace.
The peace lulls you to a deep sleep. You don't have anything else in this world other than them. Mingi, and Yunho, and everything that comes after this blissful peace. All is as it should be and the feeling is perfect.
"Me too," Mingi whispers. "This. You. Us," He nudges his face against the soft curve of your back. "Love this. Love you."
"Mm," you giggled as you kiss the corner of Yunho's mouth lazily. Your eyelids are getting so heavy that you cannot see. A content, comfortable lethargy overtakes your body. "Love you both."
“Love you too,” Yunho finishes softly, his voice barely a whisper as he leans in to press a gentle kiss to your forehead.
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imaginaryf1shots · 7 months ago
Text
My Girls | Step back
WC: 1.5K
Driver!oc x Max Verstappen
Summery: When Esteban crashes into Cecilia and blames her, Max won’t stand for it.
Warnings: Cursing, crashing, fighting
A.N: Could be read as a stand alone or part of the series.
Masterlist
Series Masterlist
Max Masterlist
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It’s race day, Cecila was starting P4 Max P3. The weather was good, no rain and it wasn't too hot. There was the possibility of a safety car but the team wasn't holding on to that. Following the team strategy for the week seemed like a good thing. Cecilia was feeling good about the race, and her pace. She had good control of the car and everything was running smoothly, some would say too smoothly. This should’ve been the sign that something will happen.
On lap 48 of 53 she was about to finish P2 just passing the pitlane exit when a car came out of the pitlane fast, this made her try and swerve away so they wouldn't crash but that caused both cars to get off the track. Cecilia cursed as she lost control of the car for a second before she got it under control and the car stopped.
Cecilia
Who the fuck is that? What the hell?
RE
That's Ocon
Cecilia
Seriously what's wrong with him
It's not the first time the frenchman crashed into Cecilia, thankfully he barely touched her car this time and from the looks of it his car sustained damage, Cecilia was able to get back on the track but she had lost her place and was down to P11 he made her loose all the points and any progress she made throughout the race.
Obviously by the end of the race she couldn't make up the positions she lost. Finishing p 9. Cecilia was angry and disappointed. Rightfully so.
She parked the car and got out walking down the pitlane to get weighted and go do her media duty. She didn't bother taking her helmet off until she was off the lane. An fia person was talking to her, they gave Ocon a penalty for going over the speed exiting pit lane and forcing her off track.
They were barely out of the public view when an angry voice called Cecilia. The female was surprised to see that it's Ocon. He had no reason to be angry with her; she literally did nothing.
"What the fuck Cecilia!"
"What are you on about?" She asked him back, her voice angry.
"You just cost me the race." Esteban shouted, moving his hand around, the much taller male was now in arms reach of Cecilia, the FIA person stepped back to let the drivers scream their hearts out at each other.
"I cost YOU the race? you cost me the podium!" She was beyond confused why he was shouting at her for, he's clearly in the wrong.
"You still got points, I came in last!"
"How in the world is that my fault, you better check yourself Ocon because this isn't the first time you've crashed into me." She pointed at him before she crossed her arms feeling defensive, the Frenchman wasn't backing down, in fact he was moving closer.
"Hey, hey calm down mate." Carlos came up behind Cecilia, he stood facing the two fighting drivers, their voices were carrying all over the area.
"Don't tell me to fucking calm down, my race is ruined, I got no points and I'm being investigated!"
"None of this is my fault and what you thought coming here to fight me will do what? Huh? What the fuck do you want?" Cecilia was really trying to calm down, but he wasn't helping. "It’s not my fault you can't drive!"
"What the fuck did you just say to -" Carlos placed his hand on Estaban’s shoulder to stop him from coming any closer, but Cecilia didn't take a step back, this irritated Estaban more. He tried to push Carlos off him but the Spaniard was holding him back. Suddenly they were joined with Lewis, the Mercedes driver stood next to his teammate quickly assessing the situation. "You shouldn't even be driving in an F1 car! Only got here because of daddy's money-"
"Woah, woah mate come on it's just one race." Now Lewis tried to stop him. Estaban then switched to French, he was shouting and Cecilia to her credit stopped talking when she saw that nothing was going through to him.
"Stupid fucking spoild brat, ccouldn't even keep it in your pants and-“
"I swear to god Estban shut the fuck up-
“Step back,mate.” Lewis said but it was like he was talking to himself.
"What's the truth!”
"That doesn't have to do with anything, stop being pitty.” Cecilia tried to reason, while also controlling her own anger.
“I'm not pity it's facts, You slu-“
Estaban almost fell on his back, a body was in front of you blocking his view to you, Estaban stumbled back. Since Carlos was holding him back he managed to help him balance himself before he fell. Looking up at who pushed him, he expected Lewis but he saw Max.
And Max is mad, he's pissed. He heard Esteban before he heard your voice and he knew enough French and heard what happened on track quickly from one of the Mercedes engineers that were around to congratulate Lewis on his podium.
"If you can’t drive, it’s your fucking fault, you don’t go around blaming people for your own wrong doings, you crashed into her, not the other way around.” Max spat the words out, he was breathing heavily, and when Cecilia tried to move to his side, Max just moved in front of her again. Lewis shook his head at her, this is now Max’s fight, no man would see another man yelling at his significant other and just stand by. Yes she can hold her own and can protect herself but it’s not about that. Max is dominant by nature and very protective, Cecilia is his and he’s not about to let someone disrespect her like that.
“You’re just saying that because you fuck her.” Once the words left his mouth, Carlos pushed Esteban back, before him and Lewis held Max back, and if they didn’t he would’ve broken his jaw.
“Max! Max, come on, it's not worth it.” Cecilia shouted trying to get her boyfriend to calm down but to no avail, in what felt like ages but in fact under a minute, more people were around breaking the two men away from each other, there was a lot of shouting cursing, Esteban and Max wouldn’t back down. It took Esteban being pulled away by his team to get Max to calm down just enough for him to start hearing what was being said to him. Cecilia held his bicep and placed a hand on his chest, he was heaving, his eyes looking at where Esteban went. “Hey, hey, it’s okay.”
“Okay, I think we can all get back to work now!” Christian who appeared mid-fight, called for everyone, the crowd started to disperse, Toto who was also present told the female to come find him after she’s done. Christian patted Max’s back and whispered something in his ear before he looked at Cecilia, with a reassuring nod, he left the couple. She can handle Max.
“You okay?” She asked him softly, Max still wouldn’t look at her, placing her hand on his cheek, he finally looked at her.
“Am I okay? Are you okay?” Max’s tone did a 180, this is her Max, the Max only she gets to see.
“Yeah, he hasn’t said anything new, and he’s wrong.” Cecilia shrugged, she’s not friends with Esteban, they don’t really have common friends, but she liked to believe that she’s on good terms with everyone on the grip, but apparently not.
“Still doesn’t make it okay.” Max pushes her hair out of her face, it’s out of the braid and flowing down her back.
“Never said it does, but you know, some men have fragile egos.” Cecilia said with a smile, her hands were on his chest, they were standing very close.
“Yeah, and they better stay away from you.” Max muttered bitterly. “Fuck, I still want to punch him.”
“That makes the two of us, BUT we have a daughter to set an example for so we’ll take the high ground.” Cecilia knew that once she brought the Nathalie card Max would cave, and he knew she knew that, Cecilia giggled at the look he gave her. “Thank you for standing up for me.”
“It’s my job.” Max kissed her forehead and pulled the female in for a hug, they were both sweaty and Max still had champagne all over him but they both needed that hug. They stood there for a few minutes, before they pulled back, they had obligations to do, and both will have to talk to their teams about what happened and the FIA would have to hear about it as well. So a lot of work for both of them.
“I love you.” Cecilia said as they rounded the corner for the media pen.
“I love you too.” Max kissed the back of her hand that was laced in his before they pulled away from each other and were joined by their own team’s PR managers to go into the media pen.
TAGLIST:
@luciaexcorvus . @vellicora . @tpwkstiles . @belennasif . @eugene-emt-roe . @fanboyluvr . @fangirl125reader . @christianpulisic10 . @belennasif . @itsjustkhaos . @crashingwavesofeuphoria . @mynameisangeloflife . @mirrorball-6 . @skynel09 . @barcelonaloverf1life . @lilipiggytails . @rebelatbay . @christianpulisic10 . @ironmaiden1313 . @dark-night-sky-99 . @amalialeclerc . @bborra . @allsouls-emma . @buckybarns4life . @distancedss . @xoscar03 . @aquangxl .
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comically-callous · 2 months ago
Note
Sorry to bother you, but I saw your asks/requests were open, and saw that you write for Gambit, I read through your works and love how you write him! I was wondering if maybe you would be willing to do a drabble/ficlet with Gambit x reader? Where reader has ADHD and anxiety? Her mutant power is Empathy, but she only feels other's emotions; can't tell why they're feeling them, and the combo kinda makes her a people pleaser type who struggles to say no to things, so ends up with extra work from other people all the time, kinda burning the candle at both ends until she basically has a mental/physical breakdown? I just really wanna see Gambit being super loving/protective.
If you don't want to/it isn't in your wheelhouse, by all means just ignore me, sorry again to bother you! Have a great day/night!
We love a Gambit request 😋
Remy LeBeau x fem!mutant!Reader
Warnings: reader cries and also blames herself for all of her problems 😗✌️
A/n: Man, idk what to put here sometimes, y’all. Reader has a regular job (not an X-Man or anything). And uhh, um, erm requests are open 👍
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This whole mess was your fault. All of it. All of the piled up work, and the deadlines you just knew you wouldn’t be able to meet, and the dread over knowing people would be disappointed in you, and your infuriating inability to say no; it was all your fault.
It was days like these when you wished you could get rid of your mutation. That way you might not be such a damn pushover. But, you couldn’t help it. People from work come into the office feeling a little down, and suddenly you’re offering to go get them a coffee, to make some copies for them, to sort out some files, and finish that research project they’ve been putting off. And in the moment, you can feel the happiness and relief radiating from them, and it makes you feel good. But, then you realize (too late) that it’s too much for you to get done in one workday.
Which led you to your current predicament. You were trying to get all of this work (which wasn’t even technically yours) done, but you also needed to get some work around the house done, and your mind couldn’t focus on one task at a time.
You reread the same paragraph for what felt like the eighteenth time, hardly making it past the second sentence before you had to begin rereading it again after your mind had wandered to your laundry that still needed cleaning.
And just when you’d gotten yourself to focus again, there were three knocks at your door. You groaned, letting your head fall to your hands for a moment before you got up and dragged yourself to the door. You looked through the peephole and saw your boyfriend Remy. He was all put together in a nice suit and tie, severely contrasting you in your pajamas with your hair a mess and makeup completely wiped away.
Your stomach sank and you completely froze. You’d forgotten. You’d gotten so caught up in wanting to please other people, that you’d forgotten about tonight.
You just stood at the door, unable to move as your heart began to pound and your throat began to feel tight. Remy knocked again, this time calling your name. You finally opened the door with shaky hands and almost immediately began to sob.
“Woah, woah!” Remy reached out and held you by your shoulders, his hold gentle yet steadying. “What’s wrong chère?”
“I-“ You choked out. “I forgot, Remy. I forgot about tonight.”
Remy had made reservations for the two of you at a fancy restaurant, one you’d been wanting to go to for a while. And you’d forgotten. He’d gotten dressed up all nice for you and it was for nothing, and you, like always, were to blame.
You continued to cry pathetically while Remy guided you over to sit on your couch. “Talk to me, chère.” He said as he gently took your hands.
“I-I forgot-“
“Gambit don’t care about that.” You let your head fall forward onto his shoulder where you continued to sob. “There’s something else, huh?” It was more of a statement than a question.
Sometimes you felt like he had some of your empath abilities as well, or at least some form of mind reading. He could always tell when something was wrong, or when someone was lying. Or maybe it was just with you. Either way, when he suggested that there was something else bothering you, you nodded against him.
“You wanna tell Gambit?”
You inhaled shakily before speaking again. “There’s just…. It’s so much- too much going on— Too much on my plate.” You said, struggling to find the words through your choked sobs and jumbled thoughts.
Remy hummed. This wouldn’t be the first time that you overwhelmed yourself with tasks and work that needed to be done. “Like what?” He asked. And he listened while you listed off all of the things at work that were bugging you and then all of the chores at home that only added to your stress, all the while he soothingly rubbed your back. And once you were finally done, he pressed a kiss to the top of your head. Your tears had come to a small occasional trickle rather than what felt like a flood a few moments ago.
“Tell you what,” Remy said as he began to pull away. “You rest here while Gambit helps.”
“What?” You asked as he put a blanket over you.
“Lay down. Gambit gonna get some of this outta your way, alright?”
You hardly had the energy to protest, and as you drifted to sleep, you could hear the soft whirring of your washing machine as Remy began doing your laundry for you.
You woke up an hour or two later to the smell cooking, and sat up to see Remy standing in your kitchen over the stove. You groggily got to your feet and walked over to him, hooking your chin over his shoulder to get a look at what he was cooking.
“You get good rest?” Remy asked as he stirred a pot.
“Yeah.” You mumbled back. “I’m sorry.”
“For what, belle?”
“For making you deal with this, with me.” You replied, burying your face into the crook of his neck.
Remy turned his head to the side to press a warm kiss to the side of your head. He hummed softly. “You know Gambit ain’t never gonna mind having to deal with you.”
“You mean it?” You asked, a soft smile on your lips.
“You know I do.”
And he was right. In that moment, standing with your chest pressed to his back and your arms around his waist, you were practically drowning in the love and care you could feel radiating off of him. And you knew that he meant it.
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narumi-gens · 4 months ago
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heading north gojo satoru x f!reader
minors/ageless/blank blogs dni, pregnancy, major jjk manga spoilers, some angst (angst-adjacent?)
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"your students are worried about you."
the heaviness of your words is undercut by your flippant tone. you wonder if satoru is surprised that you're waiting to greet him moments after he's finished slaughtering the higher-ups or if he was expecting you to be nearby.
"they tell you about their plan?" he asks, casually tossing his arm over your shoulders as he begins to lead you away from the carnage.
"you mean the plan for after you die? where yuuta cuts open your skull, takes out your brain, and swaps it for his?" you reply dryly as you wrap your own arm around his waist, instinctively holding him close for warmth as you both exit the dark corridor to be confronted with the early winter chill. you sigh softly and shake your head. "no, shoko did. I think they were too scared of my reaction."
"I don't blame them. those pregnancy hormones are no joke!" he teases, only to immediately hiss in pain when you give his side a harsh pinch. neither of you comment on how it only hurt because he let it.
silence settles over you and part of you thinks that he's going to let the conversation end there. after all, satoru has always been happy to let a serious discussion end prematurely with an annoyingly playful comment.
"you want them to leave my corpse alone?" it's as much a question posed out of curiosity as it is an offer. it's so unexpected that your feet come to a stop on their own.
he turns to face you and you can only look up at him thoughtfully, mulling over what he's asking you.
"no," you finally say with a shrug. "as long as it's disposed of properly after everything's over and done with, I don't care what they do with it. besides, you won't lose so it doesn't matter anyway."
a cheeky grin slowly tugs at the corner of his lips before he drops down to crouch in front of you. he slips his hands – the same hands that just wiped out the higher-ups in one fell swoop – beneath your coat to press a palm on either side of your protruding belly.
"you hear that? your mom's my number one fan!" he says in a stage whisper, speaking directly to your unborn child, his unborn child. you can only roll your eyes as you suppress the urge to flick his forehead.
you can feel his thumb rubbing circles through the fabric of your sweater and as he continues to gaze at your baby bump, something passes over his expression that you can't quite read.
"hm, maybe the jujutsu world won't have to wait another 400 years before there's another limitless user with the six eyes," he muses and your mouth suddenly feels dry.
the statement is weighted by the implication of his death, but it's something you look past to focus instead on what inheriting both the limitless and the six eyes would mean for your child's future.
"you'd curse our child with that?" you manage to finally ask with a small frown, your voice slightly rough.
it's not only the target that would be painted on their back that concerns you, but also the weight and expectations that would be placed on their shoulders from the moment they were born.
"if it meant their safety," he answers, his tone and demeanor both uncharacteristically serious.
you want to argue with him, to tell him that being given such great power would be the thing that puts them at risk. but instead, you ask him something else.
"you'd curse me with that?" there's something fragile in your question and your voice that has him lifting those cursed eyes to look up at you. you both know what you're really asking.
would he trust you to raise his child alone? would he trust you to keep them safe, until they were strong enough to protect themselves? would he curse you with doing what he might be unable to?
"with this?" he raises an eyebrow and glances down at your bump meaningfully. "who else would I curse but you?"
your eyes feel wet and you can only nod, unable to find the right words. instead, you lift your hands and cup his where they're still holding your belly.
despite the chaos and danger hanging over your heads and on the horizon, you take the opportunity to savor this moment – you and satoru together, your future, your legacy, held in your shared embrace.
a small thought comes to you and a faint smile forms on your lips.
"maybe they won't be born with the limitless and they'll get something different. or maybe even nothing at all and they'll have to find their own strength." your words seem to strike something in him because he gently rests his forehead on your bump. "maybe they won't have to be chained down with the burden of being the gojo heir."
he softly snorts, but you know him well enough by this point to tell that he's smiling.
"maybe they can start anew, huh?" he asks, amusement lacing his tone.
he stays where he is for another moment, his head bowed reverently to you and his child, and when he looks back up at you, he immediately takes note of the way your eyes are shining. a wide grin lights up his annoyingly handsome face.
"you cryin'? I told you those pregnancy hormones are wild!"
you're quick to shove his hands off of you and give his shoulders a hard push so that he falls over, relishing the way he cries out. as you begin to walk away from him, you're grateful that with him at your back, he can't see the grin on your lips that matches his perfectly.
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dear--mars · 6 months ago
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Do you think we’re soulmates in every universe?
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── Synopsis: Soulmates. The concept sounded unreal, too good to be true. And it seemed it was. Nothing lasts forever and the thought of being together even in another world was just a dream.
── Characters: Blade, Aventurine, and Veritas
── CW: can't find anything. (please let me know if I missed any.)
── Notes: kinda occ ngl... [angst/no comfort]
── Word count: 591 + 891 + 867 = 2349 words in total
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Blade ── Blade was a wandering soul. Both of you knew that and yet you still tried to tie him down. But could you really be blamed?
How could you think he wanted anything else when all he did was send mixed signals? One moment he’s cold and distant then he’s all over you, being needy and needing your comfort. So was it any surprise when you eventually got tired of his on-and-off behavior?
So you left. 
You started a new life on the small planet of Adion. You worked a job you actually liked, made new relationships, and never stressed too much about things that didn’t matter. It was the turning of a new leaf.
But with joy come sorrow and suffering.
A loud banging at your door echoed throughout your house. You tossed and turned in your bed, trying to fall back asleep, but the noise breaks the peaceful sleep you’re so desperately clinging to. 
You sat up, rubbing your eyes before taking a look at the clock for a few moments, it’s two in the morning. You had no idea what was going on but you had a familiar sense of deja vu that you couldn’t shake. 
"Damn it… Who the hell is that?" You mumbled to yourself before getting out of bed to walk to the front door. But once you saw who was at your door, every hint of fatigue fled your body as your blood ran cold. 
It was Blade.
You slightly faltered as your mind ran a hundred miles per hour trying to think of how he found you. You swallowed the lump in your throat and took a step back, not wanting to be in his vicinity.
Wordlessly, Blade reached out and stopped you. In the past, you would’ve said that Blade was one of the hardest men to read but as of right now, you could tell every thought that ran through his head.
Maybe it had something to do with the fact that you haven’t seen each other for a few months. The slight tug on his eyebrows that showed frustration, the dark circles under his eyes told you that he hadn’t slept for a while, and lastly the desperation and relief hidden in his eyes.
“Why?” was the only thing he croaked out.
You immediately understood what he was asking and a flash of irritation crossed your face. “Are you serious? Why? Why did I leave?” You asked, finishing his question. When you saw him nod, you scoffed.
You pulled your hand away from his but it chased after your warmth instinctively. “Why wouldn’t I leave? What have you done for me to make me want to stay?” You spat out harshly.
Blade flinched and gritted his teeth. He reached out to grab your hand again, this time intertwining his fingers with yours. “Maybe not in this lifetime but do you think we’re soulmates in every other universe?” He mumbled out, clearly in a vulnerable state.
But you couldn’t bring yourself to care. Not anymore. You cared way too much in the past, it was time to move on from this chapter in your life. Time to move on from Blade. “Do you leave me in every universe?” Your tone was bitter.
Even more so than him. Only then did Blade truly realize just how much power you had over him. You could make him the happiest he had ever been, more than he thought he could be but you could also drag him into the deepest depths of pain and agony.
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Aventurine ── Aventurine. What a man.
At times you couldn’t believe he was yours. Waking up next to him and seeing his smile made you fall in love with him all over again. But you should’ve suspected something was up with a man so perfect and flawless.
You should have anticipated this turn of events. The plot twist was so overused that the only appropriate response you could get out was laughter. Lovers betraying each other—how cliché. 
How could someone be so blind just because of love? You couldn't fathom it. You hated this trope and Aventurine knew that. Maybe that’s why he was smiling ever so slyly when he revealed his true intentions. 
After telling you the truth, Aventurine left your home cold and empty, taking any semblance of warmth with him. Years passed and you were forced to move on. Did you still love him deep down? Of course, but time moved forward whether you were ready or not.
Aventurine was born lucky. Being blessed by Gaiathra Triclops from birth, Aventurine grew up always having luck at his side. A fact that he hated but one that he relied on often. 
That’s why he thought no matter what, he’d always win. But Aventurine hadn’t known that his ‘luck’ only really constituted physical ideas and plans, not emotions. Especially his or yours, not after everything he did to you.
Aventurine felt a void in his chest like something was missing. You, Obviously but he would never admit that. As “carefree” Aventurine is, he still has his pride. He used you even if it was for work, catching feelings wasn’t an option.
But it never hurt to see how you were doing, right?
That’s the excuse Aventurine used as he sat in your hotel room. He never would’ve thought you’d be here in Penacony but it worked out in his favor. (Everything always did.)
Aventurine hears the door creak open and footsteps but they stop as soon as you laid eyes on him. Your eyes widened, you could recognize that tuff of blond hair just about anywhere in the universe.
Your breathing gets a bit heavier as your hands curl into fists. Aventurine doesn’t need to turn around to see you’re upset but he does anyway. He wants to see your beautiful face after all. 
God, you were extraordinary. Even after years of being apart, you still looked the same. If anything, you grew to be more attractive. Your soft skin, your plump lips, and your luscious hair that shined even under artificial lighting.
“Hey. It’s been a while, huh?” He asked, hiding his true feelings and masking them with a facade of confidence and nonchalance. “Never expected you to come to Penacony of all places.”
Your heart ached when Aventurine spoke to you with an air of familiarity. You hated how he acted like nothing happened between the you two. You ignored his words, cutting straight to the point. “What are you doing here.” You asked but it was more of a demand.
Aventurine raised his hands in mock surrender. “What’s with the hostility? I just came here to say hi and catch up.”
“Get out.” Your tone was bitter.
“Come on-” You cut him off,
“No. Get out of my room. Or wait, should I beg you to stay like last time so you’ll definitely leave?” You mocked, in slight disbelief of Aventurine’s audacity.
Aventurine ever so slightly faltered at your tone and words. “Okay, ouch.” He joked but deep down your actions hurt. “I just wanted to see how you were doing.” But when Aventurine saw the glare in your eyes, he decided to drop the facade.
He sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, a habit he did when he was feeling guilty or bad. “Do you remember our first anniversary? When we were having that picnic under that giant weeping willow?” He reminisced with a strained smile.
“You asked back then if we’d be soulmates in every universe and I said yes, knowing that I’d have to betray you. I feel like it’s my turn.” Aventurine paused and took a deep breath. “Do you think we’re soulmates in every universe?”
You didn’t hesitate in cutting down any and all expectations, Aventurine held. “Why would you think that when you ruined it for us in this one?” You counted with a question of your own.
Aventurine froze before smiling, trying to mask the pain in his expression. “I have to admit I wasn’t expecting you to say something so cruel but I understand,” Aventurine said with a smile, trying to act playful and nonchalant. 
He then left your room without any more complaints. The truth of the situation didn't hit him until he saw you at the bar, laughing and drinking with another man. Maybe my luck has finally run out. He thought, trying to shove back any emotions from leaking out.
Aventurine had never truly wanted anything in his life. He couldn't afford the luxury of wanting something. He never asked for all the wealth he amassed or the luck he was born with. Hell, he didn’t even really want freedom. After being chained down for so long, Aventurine wouldn't know what to do if he was free.
But you were different.
He wanted you. But he couldn’t. 
And that was what pissed him off the most.
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Veritas ── Dating Veritas was not for the weakhearted. Due to his extreme talent and unparalleled intelligence, he holds himself in high regard. He comes off as candid, self-centered, and condescending. 
Even mocking or narcissistic at times. But you knew him better. Veritas was just a bit too blunt but he was sensible and levelheaded. He wasn’t a bad person. In fact, it’s the opposite. 
He firmly believes that intellect isn’t confined to geniuses and seeks to distribute knowledge to the entire universe, all to “cure” ignorance. He wants to help people but is just a bit odd or “mean” while doing it. 
He does have a bit of an eccentric temperament but he meant well. That’s what you always told yourself but that excuse was starting to grow old. You were trying to be considered an understanding of where he was coming from, you always have been.
But you can only take so much. A person can only get knocked down so many times before they decide it's better to just stay on the floor. And it seemed you were reaching that breaking point with Veritas.
He would always point out your mistakes, nitpick something irrelevant, or just for the sake of it. You started to wonder if he even loved you. Never once did he really show affection toward you.
At first you tried to acknowledge that he might not feel comfortable with that but after years of being together, if he still wasn't comfortable enough with you to show basic affection… You couldn't help but wonder, what the hell have you been doing for the past four years of your life?
One day you had enough. 
Your words rang clearly throughout his study, "Veritas, I think we should stop seeing each other." You said vaguely but the message was clear. 
Veritas froze upon hearing your words, not expecting you to say such a thing. "Why?" he asked simply, the coldness now turning into a sharp tone. The suddenness of this topic left him confused, a part of him wanting to lash out at you, but he refrained.
"I just don't think we're compatible as a couple."
Veritas scoffed as soon as you finished speaking, feeling slightly annoyed at that word. Was 'compatibility' the thing that doomed their relationship? "So you have realised we are not compatible after so many years of being together?" His tone now sharp with the hints of slight aggression.
You didn’t flinch at his cold tone. "You don't have to get so defensive, I'm not blaming you." You said with a gentle expression, which was odd for you. You've always been more hot-headed and impulsive so seeing you like this was weird to Veritas.
"It's just that I want to be loved in a more open way and you can't provide that for me which is okay. That's just not you, and I don't want you to change yourself for me. I'm sure you're more suited with someone who's like yourself. I'm just not the person."
Veritas could tell by your calm explanation, that you’ve been thinking about this for quite some time and that fact stabbed his heart in a way he’d never felt before. "I tried my best to love you as much as I possibly can, but apparently that was not enough for you..."
"Just because you love me doesn't mean I feel loved." You countered and Veritas froze. "Let's think about it this way. Let's say you're trying to teach somebody something. It's easy for you so you have high expectations for the person you’re teaching. But that person just doesn't get it. They're trying their best but they're not understanding. You would feel upset or annoyed, right? Because their best isn't good enough for you." You tried to explain in a way he would understand.
“The fault wouldn't be placed on the person who's trying their best, it would be placed on the one who had unrealistic expectations.” You finished with a strained smile. You loved Veritas, with all your heart but you couldn’t go on like this.
Veritas had to stifle the urge to argue for a moment. He hated how accurate your example was, but he also understood your point. “Do you believe in fate? Destiny and or soulmates, things like that?“ He asked, seemingly out of nowhere.
You paused, raising an eyebrow at him. Veritas was an intelligent man when it came to logic and reasoning. Things like destiny and fate weren't “logical” in the slightest. “I suppose.” You answered carefully.
“Do you think we’re soulmates in every other universe?” You blinked at Veritas’ question. Never in a million years would you have thought that he would ask you something like that. You sighed and decided to give him a taste of his own blunt medicine.
“Do you treat me like shit in every universe?” Veritas felt his heart shatter at your response. He didn’t know you felt like that. He didn’t know that he was treating you so badly to the point where’d you had to resort to this.
He regretted asking. This would perhaps be the only time he wished to remain ignorant, despite his life goal of getting rid of it. 
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genericpuff · 5 months ago
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wait wait wait, regarding that Minthe post, you're telling me that Rachel literally wrote the character as having BPD.....and portrayed her as an abusive mean piece of shit??? WOW. fucking WOW. sorry for being so angry, but even if she "retconned" that - it's still so god damn disrespective. as someone who has BPD it hurts so much to see my mental illness villanised :(
ugh I'm so sorry pal. and I don't blame you for being angry about it, like I don't even have BPD and I'M fucking pissed LOL like I can understand why Rachel might have wanted to backtrack from that knowing fully well that Minthe's story wasn't gonna have a happy ending, but writing her with BPD in the first place and then BACKTRACKING from it as soon as she likely got heat for it (or just realized it wasn't a good look) isn't much better because it means now all she's done is written the stigmatized negative effects of BPD into her character without showing the more positive outlooks of healing and managing. Maybe that was doomed to happen considering Minthe is someone who doesn't get a happy ending in the myths, but it begs the question of why she'd write her with BPD to begin with because in hindsight it really does seem like she just wanted to use it as a way to make her "evil".
But like, when you read the actual episode, you can SEE the potential there for character growth, you can SEE that she's aware of her actions - but doesn't understand why she's "like that" which is a VERY common feeling among people with undiagnosed mental illnesses - but it was never meant to be.
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Like jfc not only is it HEAVILY IMPLIED, but again, the episode is literally called "Splitting". And we see exactly that with Minthe, who can't seem to rationalize with herself that she messed up.
But... that leads me to another point that I failed to mention in that first ask response: she DIDN'T mess up. Like, yes, she messed up by escalating it to the point of slapping Hades, but it wasn't her fault that she didn't make it to her date with Hades. Whose fault was it?
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Continuously throughout the first season we see Thetis being an awful influence who manipulates and gaslights Minthe. They're "friends", but it's clear Thetis does not have Minthe's best interests in mind. In this very scene we see Thetis manipulate Minthe and even attempt to get her so drunk that she won't be able to show up to her date. And then of course when that plan works and Minthe freaks out, Thetis spins it around on Minthe in a very passive-aggressive way.
But of course, the narrative has to find a way to turn this whole thing on Minthe being the bad guy. Hence we get the slap which shifts the focus entirely away from what led up to it back onto Hades who has, in a lot of ways, put her in a situation that she can't control. And of course, being in those kinds of situations does not help with mental health.
Like, sorry, I'm really going off here now, but... the slap happens in Episode 76.
When is it finally addressed again? Episode 103.
It took Rachel nearly THIRTY EPISODES to finally bring it back to Minthe, and in that time the reader has spent SEVERAL EPISODES reading about how sad and lonely Hades is, and about how cute and lovey he is with Persephone. The reader has not had ANY time to reflect on Minthe's circumstances, because it completely pivots away from her to focus on H x P as a sort of distraction from the fact that Minthe is a victim in her own right.
And when it DOES return to Minthe in 103, we get this harrowing reminder that her entire life is dependent on Hades-
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And once again, here comes Thetis to the "rescue", reinforcing the negative feedback loop that Minthe is trapped in where she's put in unhealthy situations. She drags her to a bar and the whole time Minthe is not having fun because she's understandably still reeling from what happened.
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Now we DO get some character development here, where Minthe realizes exactly what I've just finished explaining, that Thetis isn't her friend, that she'd rather not have Thetis as a friend than continue being talked down to and manipulated.
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But then, as we know, because Rachel still needs Minthe to be the "bad guy", the breakup between Hades and Minthe winds up being all about Persephone from a POV that attempts to villainize Minthe for being "jealous" (rather than focusing on how shitty Hades actually is for having an emotional affair with Persephone to begin with) and then Minthe goes right back to hanging out with Thetis anyways for the sake of having the "evil other girl" who wants to "ruin" H x P's relationship.
It's not until Season 3 that we finally see Minthe tell Thetis to fuck off for good, but by then it's too little too late, and Minthe has lost an entire character arc. Rachel tries to go "see! Minthe's life is so much better now that she's taking care of children!" but that's an entirely different solution to a problem Minthe never had. She never got treatment for her BPD. She just got away from H x P which, while is a good thing, isn't actually analyzed as such. It's treated more as a "good thing" for H x P and the readers, because now they don't have to be subjected to Minthe's evil scheming anymore, something something "the evil is defeated". And don't even get me started on this comic's problem with constantly resolving female characters' story arcs through motherhood.
It bums me out so fucking much. Minthe deserved so much better. She's one of the many characters in LO who make it so painfully ironic when they're done dirty, because despite Rachel's attempts to write a "feminist retelling" that focuses on "moving on from trauma", she's inadvertently done more damage to feminism and the stigmas around mental health and trauma through her assassination of grounded and realistic and relatable characters like Minthe and Demeter who are shown ZERO empathy or understanding for their actions (unless it can be done so by making Persephone and Hades into the heroes). It happens so often throughout the comic it almost feels like how the comic markets itself as a "progressive feminist retelling" is some sick joke that I'm just not getting.
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aliaology · 4 months ago
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I have a request, Could you do where the reader is Luke's twin sister and they are it is there 21st birthday and Jack and Quinn are there to celebrate with them and Luke and the reader both get really drunk and Jack and Quinn take care of the when they are both drunk and hungover
Also love your fic's read them every time you post
ofc babes <3 and thank you, im so glad you like them! <3 means a lot to me <33
fyi, ive NEVER drank before lolz so idk much bought it and i don't know what anyones tolerance here would be, so just know this is all fake and its not realistic. this is also short because idk what else to add. </3
DRUNKEN AFFECTION (PLATONIC)
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you didn't get to see your brothers that often, not with you still finishing up your few years at university of michigan and them either living in new jersey or vancouver. it was hard to say the least, especially being so far away from your literal other half; the one whom you (sometimes unfortunately) had to share the womb with. luke hughes was your best friend, and your twin. you couldn't live without the guy.
but now it is currently september 14th of 2024, a saturday, and while jack, luke and quinn should be at their respective homes, they all came up to michigan to celebrate yours and lukes birthday that happened just a few days ago. of course, you would've wanted to celebrate your birthday with luke, on said day, but schedules didn't align well and if you did it before, you legally wouldn't be able to drink. though you can't say that stopped you.
you sat in the back yard, legs crossed as you held a bottle of some form of alcohol in your hand. it was late, most of the people from the party your brothers threw, were gone. it was just you, luke, jack, quinn and a few of the umich boys. with a drunken whine, you looked to jack who snagged the bottle of alcohol from your hands.
"jackk-" you frowned.
jack rolled his eyes, "this is like your what, fifth? you don't need this much, smalls."
you groaned, looking away from him. "stop calling me that."
jack just scoffed before snagging the beer from lukes hand as well. "hey!"
"you two have drank enough. you really want mom and dad to look out the window and see you guys drinking more?" quinn spoke up.
"its our birthday." luke told.
quinn was the one to roll his eyes this time. "your birthday was monday, and now your party is over. its time to settle down."
the eldest hughes sibling walked up to the three of them and gently grabbed your arm. "lets get you both to bed."
you let out a drunken gasp. "lukeyy- we should watch uhm- uhm... oh shit whats that one movie.." you began to mutter to yourself.
jack helps luke up, who stumbles slightly. "i dont want to watch some movie." luke huffed.
you frowned. "quinny, will you watch a movie with me?"
"yes, smalls, i will." you smiled.
-
quinn was quick to get you to your room. he let you change and then went to change as well. sometimes, he couldn't stand jeans. walking back into your room, you were already on your bed with the remote in your hand, and jack and luke were in there too.
"thought you didn't want to watch some movie?" quinn teased luke as he flicked the lights off and then walked to the bed.
"shut up." luke groaned.
jack let out a laugh. "got him to his room and he already missed her. he acted like he does when we leave to new jersey."
quinn snickered, taking his spot on the other side of you. "can't blame him, they are freakishly attached to the hip."
"we are right here, by the way." you huffed.
"we know." the two eldest said.
you let out a huff of air. "you guys are lucky we love you."
jack smiled at his sister, slinging an arm around her and pulling her in. "we love you guys too, even if you're annoying as hell."
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oliver-quick-ens-my-pulse · 2 years ago
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In The Library
Ominis Gaunt x f!reader
Summary - Request for “Could you please write a NSFW scenario where Ominis and the female MC are working on homework in the library at night time. They start chatting, first about normal, everyday stuff but then the conversation turns playfully risqué, the topic comes up and MC admits that she's never been intimate with anyone before, Ominis is a little surprised because he thinks her and Sebastian have probably gotten together but MC admits that she has a crush on Ominis and then things kinda go however you want from there. Maybe they end up messing around in the library, out of sight? I love your writing ♥️"
Word Count - 1,540
Warnings - 18+ smut, somewhat exhibitionist
A/N - I feel like this definitely appeals to the folks who really like dialogue and dirty talk
You and Ominis were sat next to each other in the library. You had been lucky enough to find a spot with peace and quiet and best of all, Sebastian hadn't come to intrude you. You really enjoyed spending alone time with Ominis and felt like it didn't happen often enough.
You were about finished with the questions you had to answer for the assignment you were working on and you kept stealing glances at Ominis. He had such a particular beauty about him. His alabaster skin and clouded over blue eyes were such a striking contrast. His blonde hair always sat perfectly atop his head and you had such a strong urge to run your fingers through it to mess it up.
You loved watching his fingers glide across the braille pages in front of him it was almost as mesmerizing as listening to him read out loud to you. You caught yourself leaning towards him when your chair tipped over and you bumped right into his shoulder.
"Sorry," you muttered as you pulled yourself back up.
"Are you tired, Y/N?" Ominis marked his page before closing up his book, "We can be finished for the night if you'd like."
"No! I — I mean, no. I just finished with what I was working on for now so I was lost in my thoughts for a minute. I didn't mean to intrude in your personal space and distract you."
He smiled softly, turning to face you, "I don't mind. It might be good to take a break for a few minutes."
He leaned back, stretching out his arms and fingers over his head and you just fell back into admiring him. His smiled turned into a smirk and he rolled his eyes in your direction.
"I can tell you're staring at me."
Your cheeks turned red and you shuffled your books around to seem busy, avoiding his statement.
"It seems Sebastian hasn't landed you in detention in a few weeks."
You appreciated his change in topic and shrugged, leaning forward with your elbows on the table, "Well, he's been spending a lot of time with that student who showed up in 5th year. I'm not really sure what that's all about."
Ominis read your tone as one of jealousy, "Is that such a problem?" He sounded slightly annoyed, assuming you'd much rather have been studying with the other boy instead.
"I think it's pretty relaxing not having him around all the time," you confessed, struggling to read his expression, "I think it's been too long since you and I have spent time together without being his babysitter."
"I do agree, but I'll admit I thought you were closer with Sebastian than that."
"What are you talking about?" You angled your chair towards him, curious.
"I just thought that, well, you were..." his words trailed off and he gestured with his hand, trying to get you to understand the end of his sentence.
"Oh, gross! I would never with him. What is wrong with you Ominis? He's just an annoying brother to me."
This had his interest piqued; to hear that you lacked an intimate interest in Sebastian, but here you were with him.
He laughed lightly, "You can't blame me for thinking that. I'm not the only one. If not him then who else? Is there a mystery man in your life?" He teased you.
You felt a little taken aback that Ominis was asking you that. It also caused you to feel somewhat bashful.
"Well, no, why does there have to be anyone? What about you? I don't see ladies crawling all over you."
He wet his lips, giving you his full attention as he reached out to place a hand on your bicep.
"I might tell you, but we are talking about you right now. We spent the better part of 7 years here and there's no one that's caught your interest? That you've even experimented with."
You nearly choked on your own saliva when he asked you that. You hissed his name from your lips, quieting your voice to continue the conversation.
"Are you serious? You're asking me that here? No, I've never done anything like that, I'm way too busy with my studies."
"Never? What does that extend to? Surely you've kissed someone."
"Of course I have. Here and there, but nothing that was memorable, nobody I even care to remember."
"Have you had any clothes off with anyone around?" His voice was low and you convinced yourself that it was just to be quiet and avoid getting in any trouble.
You squeezed your thighs together to hide the heat you were feeling, but unfortunately his hand was firmly above our kneecap.
"O-Ominis, why are you asking me these questions?"
He traced over your leg with his fingers, completely fixated on you.
"I'm just curious."
You scooted your chair closer to him out of fear that you would be caught having this conversation any moment. Even if it was just Sebastian it would be mortifying.
"No, I haven't okay. I just wanted to wait for the right person."
"If that's true why are you telling me all of this?"
You turned your face away from him, speaking so he could barely hear it.
"I wanted you to be the person. I always have."
When you said that every ounce of restraint that Ominis had flew out the window. He sat up straight and took his hand back to adjust himself in his chair. He then searched for your chin, turning you back towards him.
"Then take off your undergarments."
You were floored, not having expected those to be the next words from his mouth. He felt your jaw go slack and leaned into your neck.
"If you keep your mouth open like that then we're going to have to go somewhere else." You shivered hearing the lust in his voice.
You looked around and there wasn't a soul near you. You could hear faint chatter from the first floor, but you were fairly isolated in a corner all the way up on the second floor.
You moved your hands underneath the table, jumping when he places a hand back on your thigh. His touch feels like fire now. You sit up enough to slip your underwear past your bottom and over your thighs where Ominis catches it with a finger. He slides them past your knees and lets them hit the ground with no remorse.
"You're a good girl," he remarks.
You lean against his shoulder as his hand slides past your thigh, catching some of the wetness that had leaked from your underwear.
"Ominis w-what are you doing?"
"Well, I'm not seeing anything, but I'm okay with skipping over that part for now to feel some things instead. And to make you feel some things that I think you need."
You bit into your lip hard, turning your face against his arm and clutching at his cloak as you felt a finger prodding your slick. He dragged his finger through your folds, nudging your sensitive clit and you whined against him.
"And you want to do this here?"
He swirled his finger around your entrance, slowly making his way inside.
"Merlin, you're tight," his voice was breathy as he continued going in and out of you, "There are a lot of things I'd like to try elsewhere, but I think you enjoy the risk of being in here."
He added a finger inside of you, stretching your walls and making you squirm in your seat. You squeezed your eyes closed when he added his thumb to your bundle of nerves, continuing to pump in and out of you at a steady pace.
"Ominis," his name feel from your lips are you were begging him, but you weren't sure what for. You knew you should want him to stop and not do this here, but you hadn't ever felt so good. It was nothing like any time you had ever touched yourself.
"Say my name just like that when you cum, okay?"
You were practically falling over into his lap as you started to see stars. He held you up and kissed the top of your head as he rubbed quicker circles.
"Cum for me, darling, I wanna feel your pussy pulse around me." You clamped a hand over your own mouth as you bucked your hips against his palm eagerly. You muttered his name and though it was muffled you knew he must have heard it.
As you rode out your orgasm you rested yourself in his lap, feeling exhausted, but happy. He used his free hand to nudge you upright into your seat. He would have loved to see the look of bliss on your face, but he had to settle for your gasp when he removed his fingers from you and put them in his mouth, sucking them clean with a soft pop.
"You taste wonderful, Y/N. I think I'll be hungry for seconds very soon."
You sighed and rested your head against your hands to catch your breath. Truly, your brain was just catching up to everything that just transpired.
"Ominis, you are going to be the death of me.
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aphroditelovesu · 1 year ago
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Yandere Alicent Hightower Headcanons (Romantic)
❝ 🐉 — lady l: I wanted to write something for our Green Queen and this is what came out. A romantic and a little confusing headcanon, but I hope you like it anyway! Forgive me for any mistakes, but I'm sleepy so there's that. Good reading! 💚
❝tw: obsessive behavior, mention of jealousy, manipulation, denial of feelings, messy writing.
❝🐉 pairing: yandere!alicent hightower x gender neutral!reader.
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Alicent knew she was in love with you. She always knew she loved you deeply but never had the courage to admit her feelings because she knew they were wrong. They had to be. Alicent tried her best to contain her tendencies, her feelings, but every night she caught herself thinking about you, how much she wanted to be with you.
She had to stop denying them, it wasn't healthy for her and it wasn't fair to you. It wasn't an easy task, considering how reserved and insecure she was about her feelings. She already knew she loved you long before she realized it, but she didn't know how to deal with them, how to suppress them.
Alicent Hightower is very reserved when it comes to showing her feelings. She never knows how to deal with them in a healthy way and ends up reacting in a way that is completely contrary to how she really wants to and she always ends up blaming herself for it. She desperately wants to grab you and tell you everything she feels without caring about anything, but she can't do that. She can't allow herself to do that.
She's not sure when she fell in love with you, but she guessed it was when she met you. Alicent could feel that the air had changed the moment your eyes met and you smiled at her. So ethereal that she almost knelt right there. All she could do at that moment was wave back, speechless and stunned by your presence. From her perspective, that's when she fell in love with you.
And it was her most anguished moment. For she was a married woman and with the King, she could never have you. The Queen's heart broke in that moment at the prospect of never being able to tell you how she felt. But that didn't stop her from yearning for you, every night, every day, she yearned for you and your attention. When she was with her children, in her husband's bed, she thought of you. It was in those moments that she knew she needed to end this once and for all, she couldn't think of another person that way. Not while she was married.
Needless to say, that's not what happened. Alicent managed to avoid you, she was the Queen and had this advantage going for her, but she was dying inside. Every day you weren't around her a part of her died. She needed you like she needed oxygen to live. But she managed to hold on, she persevered until when she saw you too close to someone else and something inside her exploded. Jealousy, anger, it all came out at once.
She didn't know what had happened to her when she summoned you later into her private chambers and revealed everything she felt like a devastating wave. Alicent told you how much she loved you, how much she tried to fight those feelings but she couldn't take it anymore and couldn't bear the idea of seeing someone else close to you. Not when this was her place. She finally vented and when she finished speaking, she approached you and pulled you into a kiss with passion and force. For the first time in her life she wasn't thinking about the consequences but was doing what she wanted.
Alicent felt alive for the first time in a long time when she kissed you. When you lay in her bed, naked and in love and in the silence of the night, you made love for the first time. She didn't remember being so happy. When you were lying side by side and covered by just one blanket, Alicent knew she was loved. And she loved you and would be cursed forever if you were taken from her. She made a promise to herself that nothing and no one will take you away from her and anyone who tries will suffer the severe consequences.
She is incredibly understanding and kind to you, nothing but love in her eyes and cuddles exchanged when no one was watching you. Alicent loves to sneak into the Red Keep like a child in the dead of night and escape to the comfort of your arms. She knew there would be consequences for her and you if anyone found out about this affair, but she didn't care. The thrill of being caught in your loving arms was what made her nights even better.
Alicent is not exactly possessive, but she is jealous, she just knows how to control herself. She feels jealous in a milder way, but it's still jealous and depending on who made her jealous, she'll make sure they don't dare get in her way again. Alicent will be seething with jealousy as she watches them interact with you, her nails digging into her hands and leaving marks. Her eyes will be full of tears when she comes to meet you later and she will make you tell her how much you love her, with her words and her body.
She is an unscrupulous manipulator. Alicent doesn't mind using others to make you hers, manipulating your feelings, making you feel guilty, because at the end of it all, you will be with her and that is a price worth paying. You are hers and always would be, and she knew it, but she likes to be sure and act before she suffers the consequences.
Alicent never knew what it was like to love someone so devotedly, so fervently and keep them for yourself at any cost. She have never feel that way until you come into her life and she finds out that she would do anything to have you. She just knew that she needed you desperately and felt like she couldn't think straight when she didn't know what you were doing or who you were with. She just needed you and she always would. And Alicent will do everything in her power to make this happen.
Once Viserys was dead and Aegon was King, she would be free to love you without worrying about being caught. You could stay together until death and no one would get in your way. She will be sure of that. You would always be stuck by her side, for the rest of your life. Isn't that romantic? Just you and Alicent.
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dayasusays · 9 months ago
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“say i love you”
bruce wayne x reader
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my first experience in translating my writing into eng 😭 it’s not my first language, there can be a lot of mistakes (ngl i’m scared)
words : 1007
tw / cw : ??hurt comfort??? angst, maybe ooc sorry T-T
for better experience:
"what's going on with you?" you ask softly and take his hand, intertwining your fingers with his. bruce doesn't resist, doesn't snatch his hand away. he looks up at you and tries to smile.
"nothing, sweetheart," he parries in an attempt to escape the exhausting conversation, "just... tired. again," he lifts your intertwined hands and leaves a kiss on the back of your palm.
god, he's not okay.
those running eyes, not typical of the strong, commanding wayne; those gentle touches in which you read the incomprehension of what's going on.
"bruce," your voice is caressing, sweet, "you're trying to get away from me," you don't sound upset, and you certainly don't sound angry.
"bullshit," his lips press together into a thin line, "you know i'm just busy."
"busy," you say again, "you're busy."
of course he's busy; being batman has never been easy, and you're someone who understands that just as much as he does, on every level. of course he's tired; the constant patrols, the scuffles, the villains leave wayne with little in the way of a normal life.
"but that's not the point, not the tiredness," you sit down next to him, parting your hands and resting one of your palms on his tense shoulder, which relaxes under your touch, "you're acting weird, more distant than usual."
bruce is silent, unable to admit to you that he's noticed it himself.
"do you even love me?"
"of course i do," wayne sighs, looking up at you, "to the moon and..."
"...and back five times," you finish for him and smile softly, "of course..."
...no. there was something in his words and behavior that you could latch onto.
"but it's like you still have something to say, love," you leave a brief kiss on his cheek, which he returns immediately.
"dunno," bruce resists, frowning, "i'm not sure."
it's as if he's completely consumed with guilt when you look at him like that, with all the love and tenderness you feel for him. all the anxiety in his chest gathers into a lump, remaining there as an uncomfortable feeling. wayne reaches up to kiss you, and of course you don't refuse - you've never refused to kiss him when he's in this state.
"talk to me," you whisper against his lips, your thumb gently smoothing the hollow between his eyebrows so he wouldn't frown, "i don't bite, bruce," you smile slightly, catching his tired breath and kissing him.
he doesn't even know what this is about, god, he really doesn't. all he knows is that he loves you to the core. he loves you for your endless tenderness, for your patience, for the fact that you never ever blame him for anything. bruce wayne just knows that he loves you deeply, but delicately, sometimes passionately, sometimes quietly, but he swears to himself that it's love.
"i dunno," he repeats, looking away for a few seconds.
"bruce?" you call to him, still softly, as he lets out a short, questioning sound, "i love you."
and inside he feels an inexplicable emptiness at those words. an all-consuming, black hole like emptiness.
"so do i."
"look at me and tell me you love me," you ask.
wayne looks up and looks into your eyes, feeling a lump in his throat.
"i..." he tries to start, a couple of times he averts his eyes, but comes back to you, "honey, i just..."
"say "i love you", bruce," you interrupt, slowly reaching up and squeezing his hand.
"i can't," he whispers as his blue eyes try to lock onto something in your shared bedroom.
you just nod.
no tears, no tantrums, no screaming; just a nod as you turn away from him.
"sorry," he squeezes your hand tighter, "i dunno why... why i can't."
it wasn't surprising to you; you may never have been the best detective in the world, like wayne, but you knew every thought in his head. you knew something was wrong just by the look in those soft azure eyes. there was probably no one in the world who knew bruce as well as you did; that's why now, when he lets himself cry on your shoulder and apologizes, you stroke his hair soothingly.
"i dunno why," he continues to whisper, "you're wonderful. you're the woman of my dreams," he grasps at you almost desperately and you catch yourself wanting to believe him, "maybe it's just a phase."
"you think so? that it's a phase?
"no, but i wanna think so."
you look around your shared bedroom and smile weakly. the windows are curtained, there's a hairbrush on your dressing table, his pen with a piece of paper; your two mugs, turned exclusively one way, with the same pattern.
you're in one of his shirts, he's in the pajamas you gave him last christmas; the soft blue one that matches his eyes perfectly has always suited him better than black formal suits.
you smell of shampoo, he smells of his cologne that he smelled of on your first date; the restaurant you celebrated each of your anniversaries in.
"this is home," you think, lowering your gaze to bruce and taking another look around the bedroom.
"even if you don't love me..."
god, it hurt so much to realize that.
"i still love you just as much."
"but this isn't about you," wayne responded, leaving a soft kiss on your forehead, "can i be honest?" he's almost whispering against your skin when you nod,"i dunno if i can love at all."
but his truth was that he loved. he really did, but probably not as much as you.
your truth is that you love him too much; so much that you're willing to put up with everything from him being batman to the fact that he's not even a third of the way to how much you love him.
you can't remember a time when that same bruce wayne looked so broken.
it hurts you to look at him like that; it hurts him to look into your eyes.
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lotusmi · 2 years ago
Note
SUCCESS STORY!!🤎🧸
tw//mental problems, abusive family, bullying, suicide attempt, manifest/void obsession
first of all i want to thank lotus because it helped me even when i was thinking about suicide❤️‍🩹
it's been years since I learned loa and I was having problems with the manifest. althought I have known loa for 2-3 years, i constantly reacted to 3D and for such reasons I could not manifest anything for 2-3 years. and when i first learned loa i was obsessed with void. I was hurting myself to enter void. like if you don't enter void today I will kill you. i was crazy because of void. at the same time, I was staying in the family environment that dragged me to death, and I was bullied at school . i was hated by people even though i did nothing. i tried to commit suicide many times, my family wouldn't let me go to the therapist. also, no one said anything to the bullying I saw. thats why I bullied myself for years in the same way. if I told anyone I was being bullied and asked for help, they would say it was probably my problem to my face💀💀 and towards the end of 2022, i seriously couldn't stand it anymore. i was constantly reading blogs [i think there is no blog i haven't read, lmao] and the last time i couldn't stand it, i tried suicide again, but i failed. later i wrote to lotus and she gave me a lot of advice (baby ily😩❤️) and i cried more than i have ever cried that night. the problem is that while people were already ruining me, the real problem was that i was ruining myself too. after that day, in the first week, i had so many problems in my manifest journey. but until 2023, i said to myself, "i don't want to live like this anymore. i deserve the life I want.” i made a promise. and every time I felt like quitting, i remembered my promise to myself. and now i have revised my whole life, i live in dubai🤭. if you're going to ask how i did this, i started to listen to my inner voice, i almost stopped entering tumblr. i stopped affirming and wrote down the things that i was gonna revise one by one, and added them to the notes app on my phone. i made a note at the bottom that I already have these in my life. when “what if I can't manifest the life I want?” if such thoughts came to my mind, i told myself that the creation was already finished. in this process, i focused only on myself and was developing my self concept. before I went to bed at night, i was constantly imagining the life I wanted and I was staying in that state and saying I already had the life I wanted, I didn't affirm anything extra. and even those who made life difficult for me started to apologize to me. (i manifested their karma life lol) anyway I don't want to talk more about those bitches but I want to mention this. please take a break. relax. stay away from things like void, loa for a few days. I noticed that some of you are obsessed with void on this blog. but i must say void is just a method. if i manifested the life i wanted when i was only 12-13 years old, you can do it too. take a break and do what feels good to you. love yourself. loa blogs can help you up to a point. they can't spare all their days for you. start taking responsibility. find manifest methods that work well for you. love yourself. meditate. i’ve talked a lot but I would like to add that, if someone tells you that you are the cause of the circumstances you are experiencing right now, that you created the conditions in which you live, please tell them to shut their fucking mouths. no such thing. i was blaming myself again, thinking what a disgusting monster i am just because this “you create ur reality” thingy. but the truth is that creation is already over. good luck!
MY FAV SUCCESS STORY TO EXIST!!!! 😭
I literally cried when this girl texted me saying she is living her dream life, I was so pround, I am pround 💗
Backstory, she first texted me 12/15/2022
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She told me everything about her circumstances, they were really bad ones, and she was 12 at time and this made my heart so broken (she revised her age) since her parents were really toxic and disgusting ( I am not going to say much about her old story).
So I told her all about the toxic home I lived and how I manifested it away too (my success, my failures).
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So, time passed and 01/feb I got this text!
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I literally cried because I was so happy for herrrr 💗😭😭
"How she did it?"
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She focused in her inner Self being the only reality and ignored all circumstances!
"and i would love to you to add those youtubers and blogs" insta: - kriston jackson youtube: - lana blakely tumblr: - @becomingthatgirl111 — other sources abt loa: - joe dispenza, edward art"
I literally cried so much and I am so happy for you my angel, look how you did it! You were 12 and revised your whole life! 💗💗💗
And that are people out there who don't believe that it is possible to manifest things. Look at this girl 💓
You did it amazing love, I am so pround of you. You are deserving of all the best things in the world. I wish you all the fun in life. Thank you sm for sending me this, I feel so appreciated that I had helped you, but who did all of this was YOU! 💗💗💗
✉️You all, everything is possible!
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purpledemonlilyposting · 1 month ago
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I didn’t know whether to send this ask on the lorch blog or the main, but re: why people view Dios as a villain from your last stream, I think there’s 2 main reasons:
- his entire portrayal at the end of adolescence where he’s taunting Anthy and begging her to come back to Ohtori as she & utena are riding away
- when he’s shown on the carousel after Utena gets stabbed. It’s the same carousel that’s shown before Akio goes to unlock the gate, and I’ve seen a few people claim that his speech to Utena is almost mocking her for her efforts
I’m not trying to be a lorch here, just wanted to give my 2 cents on this topic
It's best for Utena asks to go here I'd rather not clutter up my main blog XD
That's Akio at the end of the film. Dios is only seen once in the film when Anthy has a vision of him in Utena's place during Juri's duel.
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(Edit: And like a couple glimpses of him by Juri and Miki which don't even ask me wtf it means the movie is nuts.)
The second argument is the one that really drives me crazy. If you've paid attention at all to Utena's symbolic language: when you see a character who is a dark silhouette you're not seeing the truth.
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The "Dios" mocking Utena on the carousel whose sentences Akio finishes is not the real spirit of Dios. Akio has been trying to convince Utena that he and Dios are still the same person in order to get Utena to do what he wants.
But far, far away from the carousel with the mocking false version of Dios another Dios appears, one whose face we can see, one who seems to be the same one that came to Utena in her coffin. The one that exists because of Anthy. I don't think it's a coincidence that Utena meets him once again in a space between life and death.
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This Dios says to her: "Don't look so sad. You've tried so hard until now. Don't blame yourself. You've treasured the Rose Crest ring until now. A kiss, to show my appreciation".
He then leans down to kiss her ring. The ring that is, remember, a promise that Utena will retain her childhood nobility and free Anthy from her eternal suffering.
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Unlike the false puppet Dios this one is laying there crumpled on the ground with her. They're both far away from the carousel in a quiet, intimate moment. Akio is unaware this is happening. I see the true spirit of Dios kissing the ring the same as Anthy blessing the sword.
And he blesses her ring as the chorus in the background swells with the words: "I have vanished yet I still live. I exist. I am here. I exist. I am here."
And then in one of the most badass moments in anime Utena slams her fist into the ground and lifts herself back up. Refusing to give up on saving Anthy from this. She's only been stabbed once, Anthy is being stabbed a million times.
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Now what seems to have happened is some people have gotten it in their head that Utena slamming her fist with the ring on it into the ground is her rejecting Dios. You know, cause they desperately want this to be "feminist" in the way that Utena don't NEED no man to help her! Despite the fact its more sexist to act like you can't be inspired to act by someone of the opposite sex.
Utena embodies Dios' spirit. She has since the beginning. Dios has been her ally throughout the entire show. That's why Anthy's heart has been moving to her instead of her memories of what Akio used to be. How is anyone possibly reading it as a rejection other than a willful misinterpretation based on what they WANT the show to be rather than what the actual text is communicating.
I even had someone try to tell me the ring is smashed to pieces here which uh... no?
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The ring is a symbol of the promise to Anthy. The promise to become like the prince Anthy once loved and believed in for HER sake.
We see this true spirit of Dios two more times in the final episode. First he's lounging around listening to Akio brag about how Utena is going to lose. To me it seems like he's just waiting for Akio's defeat now that he has passed his purpose on to Utena. A purpose he's known he can no longer fulfill, because Akio exists and he no longer does outside of Anthy's wish and will that he could.
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Akio doesn't notice Dios at all in this scene. He's just monologuing to himself about how Utena, the one who embodies the spirit of the Prince he once was, whose power he is hungry to regain, is a fool for being so persistent. And that's why Akio will never change the world. Because this twisted world and system only exists due to the hold he has on Anthy and his efforts to fully control every piece of her.
And then my final piece of evidence that Dios is Utena's ally: he vanishes behind the drink Akio is sucking up that represents Utena's remaining lifeforce. Dios quietly disappears forever behind that glass. And it's that exact moment that Utena opens the way to Anthy.
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It's also worth noting that the fake puppet Dios peaces out when this happens too.
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So anyone saying "Utena rejected Dios in the end" I have to assume is hearing this through 2nd or 3rd hand information from someone who has never experienced the actual show as anything beyond a "sword lesbians" mood board on Tumblr.
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selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs · 7 months ago
Note
How are you doing? I hope you are feeling well.
Is it possible for a teen power or denji like reader? And if you would like maybe the reader also has the same past as denji or power from chainsaw man. You can choose whoever you want to do. I also really enjoy your posts! Thank you! And reminder for you to not overwork yourself. Please take care of yourself and make sure to take breaks. Stay safe :)
I am doing well, thanks for asking. I am glad, that you liked my posts. Enjoy ☺️
Denji! Teen! Reader
Self-Aware! Platonic! BSD Characters x GN! Platonic! Denji! Teen! Reader
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Description: There was something strange with Their Guiding Light.
Warning: OOC. Slight-Spoilers to Chainsaw Man (Denji's Past, Fate's of some Characters, Makima mentioned, No Nayuta). English is my second language.
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You put your finished homework in your bag, trying not to damage notebook pages. Your handwriting became better, your reading skills proved and, recently, your math teacher praised for all the progress you have made.
Life became... normal.
As normal as a devil hybrid's life could be. Especially, if said hybrid had to take care of a cat and seven dogs, go to school and safe people from devils at their spare time.
Your fingers brushed against a chainsaw cord.
Pochita... Aki... Power...
Would your life ever be normal again?
If someone asked you if you blamed your father, for what has happened, you would say "I dunno"
If it wasn't for his debt, you won't become Devil Hunter, worked with Yakuza, had your heart fused with Pochita... Won't meet your friends. And Makima...
This situation was complex.
Really complex.
And you didn't want to think about it.
Not now. Maybe, later.
For now, you have some reading exercises.
You stand up and took new Bungou stray dogs manga volume.
With your phone near (to look a meaning of words you don't know), you start reading it.
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🐾Their Guiding Light was really emotional and kind. And each time Guiding Light decided to say something good about them...
"Kunikida is so serious! It's cool and funny at the same time. I wonder if he could help me with math homework." Little Light was practically vibrating, rubbing against Kunikida's cheek.
"I would like to make some bombs with Kajii! Sounds cool!" Little Light was purring, curled on Kajii's head.
"Oh! Fyodor is so smart! I wanna be as smart, as him, one day!" Everyone try to hold back their laughter, looking at Little Light, who were "hugging" Fyodor's face.
🐾 But there was something, that makes them worried. They guessed, that you were a teen. And, for some reason, you have some troubles with reading. You were slow, re-reading some words, and taking your time.
🐾 They were worried, because they were afraid, that Their Guiding Light were bullied because of their reading habits. It was another reason for them to get to the real world faster. To protect you from bullies.
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You were having lunch on a school rooftop. It's not like you can't eat at the school's cafeteria.
But, if Chainsaw Devil Hunter are needed, you need an easy way to get to the battle. Without being noticed.
You were ready to take a first bite of your food, when the school building started to shake.
Another Devil (you really didn't care about what kind of devil it was), was on a run. You put your lunch box down. Time to get to business.
You didn't notice, how your phone screen became white.
You pull the chainsaw's cord and jumped.
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When you returned to the roof, you saw a group of shocked BSD Characters.
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🐾 Yosano checked fifteen minutes, checking your face and arms, making sure, that you weren't hurt. During check-ups, BSD Cast explained everything to you.
🐾 Your life became even stranger.
_________
🐾 You have a huge family right now. And a protective one.
🐾 When you were moving into the new house, some Devil Hunters (who knew about your Chainsaws) tried to stop them. It took one "F*** off, they are my kid now" from Fukuchi to stop them.
🐾 Chuuya became a second owner for your dogs. Fukuzawa became a second owner of your cat.
🐾 Kunikida and Poe are tutoring you. You wanted to improve your math, writing and reading skills.
🐾 Mori and Yosano will always run a medical check-ups on you, after your transformations.
🐾 Fitzgerald bought every merch with your Devil Form he can find.
🐾 You told Ango, Ranpo and Ayatsuji and Power's last request. They try to help you find a new Incarnation of Blood Devil.
🐾 Kids now attending the same school as you. After you defend them from bullies, they created a fan club of you. Not to Chainsaw Devil Hunter. No, to [Y/N] [L/N].
🐾 Life didn't become less chaotic. But, it became warmer. And more homey.
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volturiprincess · 6 months ago
Text
Bored
Poly volturi guard x mate reader Summary: Painting their nails when reader is bored Warnings: None really, just fluff, well one curse word but thats it A/N: I haven't written a one-shot in a while, I been mostly doing head cannons. I got inspired recently because I painted my nails from being bored. Also this is my first one-shot with reader having more than one mate 🤗. There will be a A/N in the end. Enjoy💙
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“Im bored”
My mates are all lounging around my room while I was in my bed cuddling with Demetri. I usually cuddle with Felix because well he's a literal teddy bear and Demetri usually likes to just look at me, if he could he would stare at me for hours. If I’m not with those two I'm with Jane and Alec who like to read with me either by our willow tree or on our favorite sofa located in Alec’s room. I try to balance my time with all four because I would hate to make them feel like they are not wanted or feel like I do not pay attention to their needs. Since i'm still cuddling with Demetri he answers me first 
“What would you like to do cariño?”
I was about to answer with ‘I don't know’ but then I looked at my hand that was placed on Demetri’s chest and an idea clicked
“Can I paint your guy’s nails?”
All their heads snapped to me instantly, I could tell by Jane's gaze she was about to say no, along with Alec. While Felix looked like he was so down to do it, I looked up at Demetri and he had an unsure look, knowing he might say no unless I convinced him. 
“Come on, it's not like its permanent, it might come off in like an hour after I put it on your nails”
I did my best puppy look at the four of them that I knew would make them give in. I ran to my bathroom and gathered all the supplies I could find. Heading back to where the others were, I sat in the middle of my room where there would be plenty of room for all them to sit. 
I decided Felix would be my first victim since he was the most excited of this than the other three. I went over to him and sat across from him until he pulled me into his laps.. I grabbed his large hand and admired it from different angles to see what color would fit him best. 
“I know you are obsessed with my hands but is it really necessary to look at them with such focus?”
“Yes Fe, Im analyzing what color would best suit you”
“Oh”
Alec spoke up “Didn't think you had such a focus, just the other day you said you can't focus when I or Jane ware red”
“Well can you blame me, you guys look just more gorgeous than you need to be, my mind can't get that outta my head”
I looked back at Felix and he looked at me with curiosity, I leaned in and gave his jaw a kiss. I looked through my bag and found the perfect shade of pink. His eyes instantly widened and the others snickered slightly.
“Really? Pink? Why?”
“I think it would suit you quite nice big guy, your this big muscular vampire that could rip anyones head off instantly but you have a soft side so there's that, plus this nail polish changes, when your cold it changes to purple while if you are warm it turns pink”
“Um okay but I'm naturally cold, wouldn't it always be purple then?”
“Not unless I keep you warm a certain way if you know what I mean”
He looked at me with an amazed look that quickly turned into a smirk. I opened the nail polish and went off to work. I saw the other three looking at my work with astonishment, as I finished I looked at my work with a proud grin.
“Felix you look absolutely pretty, like a pretty pink princess”
He rolled his eyes playfully but looked at his hand with a small grin. I moved to my next victim which was Jane.
“Alright my little death rose, for you I will do black, because well that's obvious”
“Very well then”
I grabbed her cold hand and went straight to work. I had to concentrate more on her because her hands are smaller and her nails are slightly smaller than average. I could feel her eyes on me, I wanted to look back at her but I needed to focus. I finished quickly and looked at my work
“Voila, what do you think my princess of darkness?”
“There nice”
“Eh i'll take it”
Next one was Alec, I knew for sure I would do his burgundy because it would match his eyes. I went to him and he pulled me into his embrace so I was sitting between his legs. I giggled at his action while he just grinned cheekily.
“For you my handsome devil, your color will be burgundy”
“Why burgundy?”
“Because it matches your eyes, it's also my favorite color”
I hear someone mumble 
“I see who’s the favorite one”
“I heard that”
I looked up at him and he was already looking at me with a soft look, he leaned in and gave my forehead a kiss. I blushed at his action and felt my mind lag function, I heard chuckles from my mates which made me snap back to reality. I grabbed the color and painted his nails. I definitely made the right choice of picking this color, it really is his color. The way the color goes so well with his pale skin really popped. I finish before Jane could say pain and admired my work
“Fuck I really did you justice Alec, this color really does suit”
“Language tesoro”
“Sorry Fe”
I moved to my last victim, well I saved the best for last. I scoot over to Demetri who already has a grin on his face with anticipation. What color would suit this casanova of a vampire? I could do red but Alec is already a close resemblance to red, I want all four of them to have different colors. Wait! I know what color, when these four went out to Seattle to deal with the whole newborn thing, Demetri had this very elegant coat that just complimented him so well, I think there was this lavenderish blue in the design and I think that shade will look lovely on him. I rummage through my bag to find that color and found it.
I look back at Demetri and he had a devilish smirk 
“So care to tell why that color amore?”
“Well since you ask so nicely my casanova of a vampire, I picked this color for the reason being it reminded me of that coat you had on in Seattle, I got to admit you look hot”
“Hey! What about me?”
“Oh my dear hunk of a mate, you looked as handsome as you always do”
“And us?”
“You two always look great in black”
Gosh you compliment one and you have to compliment everyone else on the spot. Before I could even start with Demetri’s hand he pulled me onto his lap so my back was against his chest. I didn't say anything because I knew he would get more cocky than he needs to be. It took me a bit longer to do his hands because in the middle of it he decided to shower my neck with kisses and he even started to nibble slightly. I closed my eyes for a second to regain my focus and finish. Slightly sloopy, thanks to Demetri, but I finished before that session went a whole different way. 
“Alright my loves let me see your hands”
They showed off their hands and I got to admit I did a pretty good job, no regrets with the colors I picked for them. 
“Thank you cariño, you did a wonderful job”
“Your welcome Dem, i'm glad you guys like it”
Felix stood up and stalked towards me which made me raise an eyebrow in curiosity.
“Alright my little rose, you have left me curious about my nails changing color”
He tossed me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and walked away from the other three. I hear Demetri shot out 
“HEY! I want to see that too”
So much for being bored. 
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A/N: For Felix's nail color, I actually have that nail polish on, I forgot I had it until I tried it on. I wanted to give a quick update on my Caius one-shot, I been working on it, and to be honest it will need a third part. Theres different POV's between reader and Caius and well Caius has a lot to say 😅 from what happened in part one.
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