#they are literally two halves of one idiot

[ultimatesoupdemon]

i 💛 stanarrator

need to make more content of them,,

[williamvapespeare]

"every day i'm fucking smiling;" a rant (cogent, intellectual character study) about Charles

We all know that Charles Rowland is THE character of all time. Obviously. Undisputedly (except by Netflix) blabla. I, a mixed race bisexual idiot with daddy issues, am about to fucking get into it.

I think there are a lot of ways to get into that end of ep 4 scene – I think we can look from trauma, we can look from model minority syndrome, we can look from a place of people pleasing to the extreme, but I think the best way to get into Charles (for me, personally) is to look at him as a character formed of intersections. Of in-betweens. In literally EVERY way possible, he is between things. He’s mixed race, he’s (probably) bisexual, he’s between life and death, he’s between good and bad, he’s probably sitting somewhere between trauma and healing – like, he’s CONstantly engaging in coping mechanisms and that itself is an in between.

Ok this idea of “I must be liked” very obviously will come from living a life where the opposite of not being liked is always violence, and that definitely can’t be understated. But I think this whole scene and this line in particular really speak to this very specific feeling that comes with inhabiting an identity that is ALWAYS seen as “not enough” in some way. Like, if you sit in a place where you don’t speak one side of your family’s language well enough and simultaneously aren’t white enough (or whatever enough) for the other side, you’re just like fundamentally culture-less and fighting to just be ANYTHING.

(Another GREAT example of this I think is the game Life is Strange 2, which is about two Hispanic American brothers, one of them speaks Spanish and the other one is much younger and doesn’t and there’s a bit where the younger brother doesn’t want to leave the US and says “I don’t even speak Spanish” and the other one is like “don’t worry, everyone likes you.” Like YES being “““Likeable””” is maybe the only way in when you are so fundamentally detached from a thing that you are also fundamentally part of, anyway!!)

Similarly, like all of us bisexual people know we’re constantly getting shit from both sides, from straight people and gay people and probably like, corpses decomposing in the ground who are throwing around terms like “gold star lesbian” or whatever the fuck. People just look at whatever relationship you’re in and they’re like ah yep that’s you!!

Like the whole thing is the most reductive narrow-minded stupidity, but it’s also just THE WAY. It’s the way of stuff. And being like ok, I AM NOT ENOUGH OF ANYTHING THAT I AM. How are you going to deal with that, you’re going to try and be likeable?? Because that’s something you can control!!!

And I’m low key so mad that we can’t see a continuation of this story where we get to see a character slowly come to terms with these in-betweennesses and say like, I’m not actually two halves, I’m two wholes. This is intentional in-betweenness. Like yes, blabla let the boy be bi, but it’s SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT. And I trust this show and I trust these writers to get that right and we were robbed of that.

So yeah idk tldr “every day I’m fucking smiling” was like the gut punch of the century. Whoever wrote that I’m omw to haunt your local Denny’s with my extroverted mixed race bisexual energy THANK U

[spreadyovrwings]

Honey, I Can Feel Your Pain

A late night heart-to-heart before the end of the world. Or, two idiots try to talk about their feelings but they’re both demons and not very good at it.

Pairing: Alastor x Reader

Warnings: my writing/me trying to navigate a complicated character, i cringe therefore i am

A/N: literally just ignore me lol i wanted to see if i could write Alastor well so this is something of a personal challenge and a warm up for me (and i’m obsessed with him) so hopefully i’ve done him justice. there’ll be a part two if anyone wants one!

//

Chapter One

The door to Alastor’s studio was always locked to everyone but you. You weren’t sure how he did it. He was a complete technophobe, so a hidden camera was out of the question. Perhaps he’d cast some sort of spell or could sense you coming. You weren’t sure. All you knew was that if you needed to see him, and Alastor permitted it, his door was always open.

That night, the radio tower was dark and still, the only sound a slow, jazzy number sent oozing over the city and into people’s homes.

You found Alastor at his sound desk, one long finger poised idly on a bakelite dial, as if debating whether to alter the sound his tower produced. His ever-present smile was fixed in place but his lips were closed, his deep red eyes focused.

You tapped your foot against the floor, once, twice, three times, announcing your presence as gently as you could so as not to disturb him too abruptly. It didn’t matter that Alastor had to let you in in the first place, it always seemed impolite to come barging in.

He didn’t look up as you approached but you could tell you had his attention, and when you put your hand on the back of the chair next to his, a question, he answered with a short nod.

“Are you alright?”

Alastor barely moved, his eyes fixed on the glowing buttons and dials in front of him.

“Fine, fine.”

He spoke faintly, airily, with no hint of static, as if he were lost in thought. You couldn’t help feeling like you’d interrupted a private moment.

“It’s just you’ve been locked away in your room for days now.”

“Hard at work! Nothing more.”

As if to prove a point, Alastor wrapped his long fingers around the dial and adjusted the volume, then slid his fingers along the desk to conjure up the next song.

This tune was a lot more uptempo. It wasn’t like Alastor to be so sloppy, you must really have caught him off-guard.

Alastor seemed to realise his mistake too. He turned to you, leaning back in his chair, exuding a confidence and poise that many envied and few saw through.

“Is there something I can help you with, my dear?”

His attention was yours. Too late to go back now.

“You’ve been quiet ever since Charlie came back from Heaven.”

“Well, I-”

“And you don’t go quiet,” you pressed on, refusing to let him chart the course of your conversion. “So what’s wrong?”

The two halves of his face told two different stories. Alastor’s eyes were fiery and guarded, he didn’t like being questioned but you’d cornered him. Below, his smile stretched his skin. You wondered if it hurt.

“I’ve been reviewing the situation,” he said after a thoughtful pause, every word considered and weighed.

“You’ve missed dinner four nights in a row for that? I made all your favourites to try and entice you down, you know.”

Alastor hummed. He wasn’t listening.

“Do you know, for almost one hundred years, I have lived here quite happily. I’ve carved out a nice little niche for myself. And then the princess started getting bright ideas…”

Alastor’s long fingers danced over the faders again but he didn’t move any of them. It seemed to be the habit of a lifetime. Two lifetimes.

“The angels… Unsettled me. And you’re quite right, I don’t get unsettled. It required meditation.”

“The angels unnerved you?”

“Unsettled. But I suppose there’s not much point arguing over semantics. Either way, the result n’est pas bon, cher.”

“What did they say that unsettled you?”

One of Alastor’s ears flicked in irritation. It was a rare thing for him to give away even that much. It was a particular kind of personal hell, for him to have a body that could betray him so visibly. He could rattle everyone with his big grin, he could even hide pain behind walled eyes, but the attributes given to him, gifted to him, shackled to him, when he fell, weren't so easy to control.

“It’s not quite that simple, my dear. The angels are all bluster and hollow virtues. I care very little about what they have to say, the self-righteous...”

He took a breath.

“But then they halved the time till the next Extermination. It’s of little consequence to me. They’re clever enough to leave me alone most of the time and if any angels do try their luck, well, they’re quietly done away with. Plus, it’s just plain old good sport to watch the show.”

You smiled.

“Might have to disagree with you there, handsome.”

Alastor laughed humourlessly, a dry, sharp sound like a bow pulled roughly against violin strings.

“That’s just it, I might too. The issue is… Now it’s only a few weeks away…”

The song changed. Low, smooth, like sand through an hourglass, a single trumpet groaned into life, filling the room before disintegrating and travelling along the airwaves. Was it a distraction? Was Alastor struggling to hold his focus? Who knew? Maybe not even him.

“Alastor,” You leaned forward in your chair, undeterred by his hesitancy. “What’s wrong?”

His gaze slowly slid to you. The close-mouthed smile was back. It was the closest he ever came, or ever could come, to relaxing his expression completely.

“It usually doesn’t bother me,” Alastor murmured, his words barely audible over crackling static.

You frowned.

“But this time it did?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

Alastor’s nose wrinkled.

“Because before, I didn’t have you. It was easier. I’ve never relied on anyone or had anyone relying on me. Now there’s the hotel, its inhabitants…”

You remedied the sting with a vacant smile of your own.

“When you say ‘you’, you mean all our friends?”

Alastor shook his head.

“No. No, I was attempting to obfuscate.”

“Oh.”

Alastor stared at you. You stared back. Then, with a clang, the penny dropped.

“Oh!”

“Mm.”

“Oh, dear.”

“Quite.”

You smiled at his sour expression. Your own face was burning but you bravely ignored it.

Your relationship with Alastor had been a nebulous, vague sort of a thing. He was a terrifying colleague to have at the hotel, and at first, you couldn’t be sure why in Hell he was there. He liked to watch others struggle, suffer, and fail miserably, it was all just good entertainment for him. But that couldn’t be all there was behind his sudden interest.

As soon as you figured out that Alastor served himself and himself only, things became a lot clearer, and it was a lot easier to like him. You didn’t have to worry about trusting him, because you couldn’t. You didn’t have to question his motives, you knew they were ill-intentioned and that you were better off not knowing. He liked to pretend he was oh so mysterious, but Alastor was perhaps the most honest person in the hotel.

Mutual respect grew into friendship, into something more. You often went out with Alastor when he required assistance or just wanted some company, and you were always the first person he came to when he got home.

Slowly, incrementally, that trust bloomed. Alastor began to ask for your opinion. You would sit together in companionable silence, reading by the fire long into the night. He didn’t need to ensnare and trick and manipulate you, because you did things for him happily and without question, though within reason.

He was always honest with you, or at least, as honest as he could be without it endangering his own self-preservation. And you respected that. It was a harsh world, you had to look out for yourself, but slowly, so slowly that neither you nor your friends had noticed until it was too late, Alastor had bound his life to yours.

You hadn’t appreciated the depths of that connection. You’d always known you had a soft spot for him, ill-advised as it was, but never in all that remained of your afterlife could you have anticipated a requited affection.

Alastor interlocked his fingers and rested them in his lap, keeping his composure well considering the situation.

“It pains me to think of you in danger.”

You couldn’t help it, you laughed quietly.

“Steady now, Alastor. You sure know how to sweep someone off their feet.”

He’d never rolled his eyes at you, he was far too refined for that, but Alastor gave his equivalent, waving an airy hand at you and soldiering on.

“We have always been close, you and I. Right from the start.”

“That’s not how I remember it but…” You smiled. “I like to think of us as a little team.”

He brightened, his pained smile morphing into something a little more authentic.

“Exactly! A team! But what was once companionship and, admittedly, amusement-”

“Do you mean we have fun together or do you mean amusement at my expense?”

Alastor waved his hand again.

“A little of column A, a little of column B.”

“Wonderful.”

“What I mean to say is… My feelings have evolved somewhat.”

In all the time you’d spent with him, you’d never known Alastor to be so hesitant. In fact, you couldn’t remember a time when you’d seen him show any sign of apprehension. His stitched-on smile was still intact but his clawed fingers drummed against the sound desk and his gaze had been lost in safer ground, somewhere over your shoulder.

“Evolved into what?”

Though your heart was thudding in your ears, you didn’t hesitate to push him. You thought one of the reasons Alastor had grown to enjoy your company so much was that you liked to talk, as well as listen. He got bored so easily and he’d always been a chatterbox; you were one of the few people in his life who could match him in that without any sign of fear or an ulterior motive.

Alastor’s ear flicked again. This was a hard conversation for him.

“The Extermination meant nothing to me before. But now, the thought of it…”

You watched his eyes grow unfocused as his imagination consumed him. His fingers stopped drumming. The song on the radio rose by a few decibels.

“Alastor, it’s okay-”

“It frightens me. And it’s not about self-preservation this time. When I consider how our companions may fare…”

“They’ll be okay.”

“What if I can’t protect you?”

Sensing you might need to ease off, take a breath, anything, you leaned in closer, reaching out for him but never, ever touching him without asking first. Instead, you rested your hand beside his on the desk.

“I don’t need protection, Alastor.”

“Still, I want to keep you safe, my darling. There’s a… A sharp tug here…”

He pressed one clawed hand against his empty chest.

“And here…”

He dragged the same hand down to the pit of his lean stomach.

“When I think about you in any kind of danger.”

How did he always manage to be so charming, even when he didn’t mean to be?

You barely held back a pleased smile. Like Alastor’s, it tugged at the corners of your mouth, threatening to spill over into a stupid, happy grin.

He didn’t have the language for what he felt, that was fine. You and Alastor had always found a way to communicate, even without words. He’d told you more with one gesture than you ever could have expected him to say aloud.

But it wasn't just unexpected, it was completely astonishing. You couldn’t let him sense that though, it might make him retreat into himself. So instead, you turned it back around on him, letting Alastor choose how much he wanted to give away.

“What do you think that could be?”

“I have an idea. But I dread to think.”

Alastor’s eyes narrowed slightly, and you knew you were on the same page.

It would be difficult for him, far more than it had been for you, to pin down and explore and accept the feelings you had for each other. You hadn’t been able to figure out a better word for whatever it was that fizzled between you, though, like Alastor, you had a sneaking suspicion and it terrified you.

Nothing sounded right. Logically, you knew there were some words that ought to fit, but acknowledging them felt like wearing someone else’s shoes.

You couldn’t imagine how difficult it must be for Alastor to come to terms with it all. So it surprised you when he slid his hand over yours.

It wasn’t the first time you’d touched, he was always holding out his arm for you, patting the top of your head, often even lifting your hand to his lips when he greeted you in the mornings or bade you goodnight. But this wasn’t a fleeting brush of his hand against yours, this was sustained, purposeful contact, and it meant something, to both of you.

Alastor’s gaze still couldn’t meet yours, so he stared at your hands, his close-mouthed smile back in place.

“I’ve grown quite fond of you,” he said quietly, and it was just his voice you could hear, no static, no sound effects, just Alastor.

You smiled.

“I’ve grown quite fond of you too, handsome. I get the same feeling.”

“You do?”

“Yeah, all the time.”

“Oh, well, that’s reassuring, at least.” Alastor finally met your eyes, his head tilted quizzically to one side. “Have you told anyone?”

“What, and admit I’m in love with the Radio Demon? No thanks, I’d never live it down.”

Feedback shot through the room, a grating, warped sound, like someone had held a microphone too close to a speaker. It was hard to tell if the sound emanated from the mixing desk or from Alastor himself, but his scarlet eyes were wide.

His hand tightened over yours, though it was more likely out of surprise than him trying to give you comfort. The tips and edges of his sharp claws dug into your skin, not enough to hurt, but it still made your jaw clench.

Alastor, to his credit, didn’t seem as put off by the admission than you might’ve expected. Maybe he wasn’t surprised by the actual sentiment, just that you’d finally said the words out loud.

You smiled.

With just a week or so left until an Extermination that would surely kill you all, there wasn’t much room left in your damned soul for shyness. It wasn’t an all-out ‘if this is my last chance to say it’ confession. You and Alastor had always appreciated candour, and with so little time left, why not say what you were both thinking?

“Have you spoken about it with anyone?”

Alastor shrugged.

“Well, yes, I’m doing it now.”

“No, I meant someone you can trust. Someone you can talk about your feelings with.”

Alastor watched you blankly.

A second penny dropped.

“Oh.”

You had to resist the urge to shiver under his heavy stare.

“You couldn’t talk to Rosie?”

“I considered it but, bless her heart, my old friend can be a sentimentalist. No, best just to get to the source of the problem.”

“Alastor…”

You huffed, pretending to be insulted, and Alastor’s smile once again looked a little more real. It met his eyes, open, unguarded and calm.

“So, what would you like to do about it?”

“Hmm,” Alastor raised the hand that had covered yours to tap one long finger against his chin. “Any chance you’d let me lock you away in a secret, impenetrable bunker?”

Your smile grew.

“Sorry, honey.”

Alastor tutted.

“I thought as much.”

“Do you have one of those?”

“Hm?”

“A secret, impenetrable bunker.”

“That’s for me to know and you to find out, my dear. You’ll just have to be particularly careful. And perhaps this… Feeling will go away with time.”

You smiled, barely resisting the urge to roll your eyes.

“Perhaps it will.”

“When I’m right, I’m right, my darling.”

”That’s not the expression and you know it.”

//

Master List

[isaacswhy]

dating isaac & yumi hc's? 👀🙏

dating isaac & yumi hcs

chill chaos. like they go from chilling in your room one minute to yelling because something got them in a mood to debate

these two are genuinely really smart but when you put them together they are. so fucking stupid

you try to keep them on task if they need to do smth but it always ends in you guys doing literally nothing productive

the two tall boys of tgc. isaac and blake are both over six foot so there's probably a height difference going on here

cuddles. blake is less cuddly but loves it anyways. he won't usually go out of his way to cuddle but he's so down if you initiate it

isaac on the other hand BEGS to cuddle. comes in your room like "baby can we lay in bed and watch tiktoks :("

sometimes blake walks in on a cuddle sesh and just casually joins without saying a word

other times it starts as them both cuddling you and then somehow they're cuddling each other? neither of them say a word abt it

literally they both eat so much. you wonder how their combined doordash spending hasn't put them in debt (they are both dashpass members)

sitting in one of their rooms and they just go 'oh hey i ordered us food' like ??? okay sure

when it's the three of you the feasts are legendary. literally nothing goes to waste because they have an innate ability to smash food like it's nobody's business

so they both like quality time and physical affection but their TRUE love language as a poly couple is gift giving but it's just food giving

the munchies are insane

if it's your thing, the three of you get high together quite frequently. it's nothing too much but you just have some edibles that either isaac or blake bought and chill

although none of you are really vloggers there's constant content on your ig stories of each other doing random shit

every few months you and isaac fill some random part of blake's room with plastic balls. it's tradition

if you choose to be in your gym arc you have a bf for it. if you choose to be in your lazy arc you have a bf for it. perfect halves

dinner dates are most common but also they do like a good clothes shopping trip. it's mostly isaac but

blake likes to take you (and isaac) to obscure places he finds in town. abandoned malls, petting zoos, cat cafes, you name it

they are also both amazon impulse buyers. both blake and isaac will randomly come to your room with a giant box and it's some random shit like a barbie dreamhouse

both of them like when you play with their hair. you sometimes nag isaac about getting his hair cut but it's fun when it's long

you tell blake not to cut his hair and when he inevitably does you and isaac both clown on him for looking like an idiot

the group chat of you three consists of some strange memes and tiktoks. there's not really an explanation to them they just send em

you have seen them actively get into an argument about who wants to go out and get your morning coffee shop order more. like it's a competition or smth

both like to surprise you with things but are terrible at hiding it

blake streams on twitch and you and isaac just chill in the call with him while he games and yells at shit

you both fuel chat and get him upset because you run channel point predictions as to whether he dies or not

they're great bfs.

I LOVED THIS like they're my second favorite i think for poly ships. i hope you like it :D

[mammalsofaction]

Missing You

Rating: T

Relationships: Heinz Doofenshmirtz/Perry the Platypus, Balthazar Cavendish/Vinnie Dakota

Add tags: Takes place between Escape and Milo in Space, Perryshmirtz centric, human Perry the Platypus, post break up arc, post confessional and apology, making up and making out in an open plan room with pre teens in them, everything is good and going right and will go absolutely horrendously wrong in a couple of moments, if you ignore the fact that they're all looking for a pre-teen abducted by aliens you can pretend this is fluff, OLD MAN YAOI!!!!!!!!!!, simp Perry, I was only meant to hurt you in the right way 🥺

"How did you know we were here, anyway?"

Perry had not exactly been hiding, but he feels found anyway, his smile involuntary as a kid who finds himself caught in game of tag in a school playground. Heinz approaches him carefully, arms tucked behind his back like he's keeping himself in check, so Perry stills himself, remembering that it isn't quite his place to reach out now, not anymore.

Carl, he signs--the C sign blending into the leader sign, pinching the tips of his left hand with the curl of his right. Heinz let out a little Ah, noise, and his eyes downcast. Like he's disappointed.

There is silence between them, as it rarely ever is, and rarer still the awkwardness in the air as they think of all the words they should be saying, that should be said, and how to say them. Perry consoles himself with the fact that Heinz had at least yet to leave, but he leaves a gap between them like a gulf Perry isn't sure how to bridge.

It isn't often that Heinz Doofenshmirtz is ever lost for words, so Perry--as he always does--meets him in the middle.

Did you get my card? He asked, because he needed to know. Because he'd worried about it endlessly since he'd sent it, because it had kept him awake at night, thinking if it was too much, or too little.

But Heinz smiles by the mention of it, baby blue eyes sparkling under the alien fluroscence, and all at once it was worth it.

"That you sent through Vanessa?" Heinz chuckles, confirming. "Foul of you, Perry the Platypus, using my daughter to send our messages back and forth like some sort of owl postman. She's got better things to do with her time, you know."

He did know. Vanessa had consented anyway, had in fact been loudly enthusiastic with the idea once she found out about their current disagreement, and had loudly scolded Perry for being a 'Dumbass idiot who shouldn't be keeping things to himself when they've all established the fact that communication was what kept this relationship from falling apart despite literally both of your entire careers.'

Having only sent the one card had been an act of restraint. On his worst nights, Perry had imagined breaking into the Murphy residence on the other side of town and crawling on his knees for forgiveness, but even after all this time, he was still too afraid of showing his belly even to the people he loved.

I did, you know, he tells him, because he couldn't let himself be vulnerable then, and the next best time was now. Miss you.

"Yeah," Heinz said. "I-uh. I missed you too. Probably Vinnie could tell. The kids, too."

Vinnie, huh? Perry teased, to hide the sudden heartache, and that all too familiar snarl of jealousy. Didn't realize you guys were on a first name basis.

Heinz gives him a look like he could tell, anyway. Perry pulls at his collar, blushing.

Sorry, he signs.

Heinz sighs. "It's whatever. We were just two lonely guys looking to distract ourselves from our missing other halves, I suppose."

Perry chooses to latch on to the latter half of that sentence. I'm your other half?

Heinz stares at him, his hands, then back into his eyes. "You're kidding, right?"

I didn't think, Perry's hands flutter, and fails him. I thought you'd, I thought I'd really,

But then it didn't matter what he couldn't say, because Heinz bridges the gulf himself, and Perry feels the kiss, before he'd even caught his move, and even after all this time their lips fit together like puzzle pieces, and Perry falls forward like a broken stone wall.

Missing you, he had written on the card, because it had been the most accurate plead he could think of. You were missing from me.

It's deep, but brief, on account of being met with a chorus of loud protests and jeers from their unwilling audience, and Zack Underwood yelling loudly, and pointedly, that this spaceship was open plan, people, come on. Perry pulls away first, chuckling and feeling lighter than he has for months, while Heinz rolled his eyes. He does not, at least, take his hand away now that it has settled into Perry's hip, and he feels so happy he could die. He buries his face into Heinz's shoulder as he scolds the children for interrupting an adult conversation, while Melissa Chase comments lightly that, technically, the bathroom was closed off.

"Bathroom for adult conversations, got it." Dakota quips, and Cavendish hits him over the head without even looking up from where he's handling the ship's hull control.

"I'm 14!" Underwood shrieks in an impressive high tone as Perry begins to laugh. Poor stranded boy in space aside, he thinks things are really starting to look up.

[dxckgrxsonx]

Gorgeous, I'll literally pay you for some more pic dick Jason content. Like!!!!! That's some good stuff right there!!!!

sdkdkskjds. this has a little more angst than i wanted but it sets me up really well for the next scene

**

In the middle of fighting off one drunken idiot with a baseball bat, Jason watches his heads up display flash with no less than seven separate notifications at once; each one more alarming than the last.

Your name flickers across the screen alongside three text messages and his mouth jumps up at one side, it’s half a smile at best, more of a reflective little tug of amusement, maybe of fondness at the thought of you.

But it’s there.

If anyone were to ask if he smiled at the sight of your name, he would plead the fifth amendment without a second of hesitation.

Well, if anyone asked but you of course.

He’s found that recently, you’ve been a pretty big exception.

There’s a shrill war cry echoing through the street and Jason fights the urge to roll his eyes but fails miserably.

It doesn’t take much to topple the drunken young man, something that he’s thankful for. Just a brief pull when the wooden bat meets his open palm and the man goes cartwheeling forwards into a brick wall.

Easy.

Finally glancing through your messages, Jason smiles.

You: i’m breaking into your apartment You: i’ve got a craving for crime You: and also jelly beans

Checking his remaining notifications, Jason absentmindedly grabs the fallen baseball bat and snaps it over his knee in one move. There’s a splintering crack and sharp spikes of wood rain down over the pavement.

Sprawled out on the floor the young man looks up, eyes unfocused but wide, nearly horrified. Scrambling disjointedly to his feet he takes off sprinting, each step uncoordinated, clumsy. Jason wonders if he’ll even make it to the end of the street without falling flat on his face.

Throwing the two halves of the bat onto the ground he focuses his attention on the message informing him that someone has entered his apartment.

Through the window.

Grabbing his phone he opens up your text message trail and replies,

Jay: is the door not good enough for you? Jay: i’m sure you’ve got a key

Somewhere in the back of his head, Jason remembers giving you a spare key to his apartment, and remembers the gentle look on your pretty face. It felt like adrenaline, felt like he was taking out something important from between his ribs and handing it to you; trusting you to keep it safe.

Jason looks back sometimes and wonders, was it his heart he gave to you instead.

You: window’s more fun You: gives me more of a breaking and entering vibe You: go big or go home You: or should i say ‘go big and break into someone else's home’

There's almost an air of comfort sticking itself halfway down his throat at the thought of you in his apartment.

It tastes sweet, reminds him of warm, golden honey or pastel pink cotton candy. Indulgently, Jason wonders if you would taste just as sweet. Wonders if he kissed you, licked into your smart mouth, if you would taste like spun sugar.

He wonders if your pretty pussy would taste the same.

Sure, you’ve been in his apartment before, more often than not sitting on the kitchen counter whilst he makes something to eat and stealing bites when his back is turned. Or demanding he puts his head in your lap so you can play with his hair.

But it’s different this time.

This time you’re in his apartment and he’s not.

Jason can’t quite understand why that’s comforting.

Jay: have you been talking to Grayson again? Jay: thats the sort of stupid shit he’d find hilarious You: where do you think i got the joke from? You: also tell me where the jelly beans are You: or i’ll burn down your apartment

He still has the habit of stashing food.

Back in the manor he remembers hoarding non perishables, and remembers slipping food into his little pockets when no one was looking. He was young and still waiting for the other shoe to drop, still waiting for the moment that Bruce changed his mind, convinced that his time in that home was limited.

It was limited.

Just not in the way he first thought.

There’s a hollowed out space in the back of his bedside table at the manor filled with peanut butter, jerky and tins of various fruit, vegetables and meat. He wonders if Alfred has found it yet, part of him thinks he has.

He would hide weapons under his pillow, under his mattress and Alfred would find them. He would take the one from under his pillow, but let him keep the one hidden under the mattress. Jason never told him how much that meant, he’s not even sure if Alfred remembers.

He’s found that no matter where he goes, the habit follows.

Each safehouse has its own stash. All in different places just in case. There's a self conscious sort of pull in his gut when he thinks of telling you where those stashes are, almost like he’s afraid of what your reaction would be.

The jelly beans are tapped to the underside of the sofa and his head can’t come up with a casual reason to explain why they’re there.

Jay: wow Jay: first it was breaking and entering Jay: and now you’re adding arson to the list Jay: living up to the mug i see

You don’t reply for a few minutes and Jason finds himself flicking his knife through his fingers. A nervous habit. The blade twirls from thumb to pinky and back again. Tossing it into the air he follows its trajectory and catches it by the handle.

He wonders what you’re doing.

You: found them You: your siblings must be the worst if you’re hiding things under the sofa You: i’ll buy you more the next time i’m out

His hands are shaking.

The first thing he’ll be doing when he gets home is changing where he hides his food.

Slotting the knife back into its holster Jason feels the urge to sit down, legs suddenly weak. There’s a thousand different thoughts ricocheting around in his head, each one knocking into another and spiralling in a completely random direction. He doesn’t know if it’s panic or not.

He feels almost like a child again, trying to protect something that’s his.

Logically, he knows that you’re not going to take it, you’re not going to judge him for a reflective habit born from nothing but survival instincts. But he still has that niggling what if feeling in the back of his head.

Inhaling a steadying breath Jason closes his eyes. He trusts you. You’re his best friend. He’s given you a key to his apartment. You’ve seen his dick.

You’re not a threat.

His hands stop shaking.

Jay: i’m nailing all my windows shut and changing the locks Jay: i can't hide anything from you can i?? You: fuck no you can’t You: im going home now You: left something on your bed to say thanks though You: 😉😉

**

[sylenth-l]

hello! hunter age anon back once moe with another question!!! (sorry ig yhis gets annoying!!!)

i want to ask about Cayde's dynamic with andal!!! like, how to portray their relationship and maybe cayde's general psyche when it comes to people and forming bonds.

Not at all, I love getting questions about my guys!! (I'm just bad at answering them aksdjhflks OTL)

It's… complicated, I'm never sure how to describe characters' relationships with words. I know it sounds incredibly cheesy, but to me Andal and Cayde are two halves of a whole, one feels incomplete without the other. Even if we're talking about them being just friends, they're the type who always show up everywhere together and if for some reason they aren't, they'll be texting each other non-stop still. "We're two halves of a whole idiot" - that's literally them.

You could say that they knew and understood each other perfectly, but I feel like while it's true in general everyday scenarios, on a grander scale Andal always had an upper hand in that. He knew Cayde like the back of his hand, he trusted him and believed in him far more than Cayde ever thought of himself. Cayde however wasn't exactly that sharp when it came to serious things about which Andal avoided speaking head-on - like, Cayde couldn't understand why Andal takes his Vanguard duty so seriously. It was only after he spent years as the Hunter Vanguard himself that he started to get what Andal must've felt. I don't think it's Cayde's fault or something though - Andal most likely barely ever talked about that, and he himself didn't exactly need people talking about their feelings to understand them.

I think it's safe to say, judging by how everyone speak of him and the leadership positions he seemingly effortlessly always ended up in, that Andal just gets people, he understands them extremely well and can find a common language with just about anyone. He was the one who made "significant progress in faction accords". What kind of person you must be to make faction leaders come to an agreement, at that time especially??? Convincing, sharp and charming sounds like an understatement alksdhfkjaks

So, I think it was that quality that helped Andal almost immediately see right through all of Cayde's clowney facades. And his own kindness and honesty pretty much left Cayde totally disarmed. Andal got to know him - the real him - and loved him, thought of him as his best friend. And made damn sure Cayde was aware of that as well. That's actually so, so incredibly important - because with the way Cayde is, he constantly thinks that deep down people surrounding him either dislike him or are disappointed in him. No matter how much time they spend together, it's not something he himself will just get one day because "well it's OBVIOUS" or something. His relationship with Ikora and Zavala are probably the most striking example of that. Ikora says he was one of her closest friends - Cayde says he's not sure if Ikora even likes him. The City is flooded with Cabal, lightless Guardians scattered all over the system, humanity is in shambles - and Cayde is genuinely surprised Zavala is looking for him and needs him. He leaves messages for both of them in case they kill him, making it sound like he wouldn't be surprised at all if they did. That… really shows the abysmal gap of misunderstanding between them, to put it lightly.

But Andal! Cayde never once doubted Andal and Andal's feelings for him. The good old days he speaks so fondly of is the time when he ran around the Solar system with Andal and their pack. Even if he sometimes laments that Andal is too serious and bad with jokes, that seriousness and honesty is actually just another proof that if Andal says so, then he really does like him and is impressed by whatever Cayde wanted to impress him with this time. 

I think it's probably one of, if not the most important part of what made Andal so incredibly special to Cayde - that freedom of being able to be equally honest with him, be real. Goofing off because he simply wants to goof off - not because he prefers to give people lower standards so that they won't be disappointed in him when he fails. Sharing his muddy concerns and fears that he barely even can put into words, knowing it won't be laughed at or brushed off as unimportant. Absolutely everything got better instantly if they were in it together. The mere presence of one of them in close proximity immediately cheered the other up.

I don't know, I can talk about them for hours and still not say what I wanted to say. I always miss the most important stuff somehow, no matter how many words I pour in. Honestly, I think that to better understand what was happening between them, all you have to do is to (re)read "The Man They Call Cayde" - literally half of it is basically Cayde's love letter to Andal.

[wooo-oo]

dewey and gosalyn headcanons!!

a quick reminder that, to me, gos and dewey are dumbass platonic besties, real two halves of a whole idiot here.

dewey and gosalyn steal each other’s clothing right up until dewey gets too tall and then it’s gos stealing his clothes and dewey pouting about it.

gosalyn is a regular guest on dewey dew-night

she teaches dewey how to use her grapple and crossbow but in a fight, he’s better at hand-to-hand and she takes ranged attacks

they entertain the idea of a superhero duo but drake and donald shut that idea down in unison

DRAMATIC BESTIES. get the two of them in a theater program immediately

if anyone asks “are you guys dating?” they have to endure the two of them fake vomiting in sync until they apologize

gos is dewey’s copilot whenever he’s flying the plane. this seems like a good idea until the two of them start jetting off around the world whenever they feel like it

since launchpad is patrolling with darkwing every night, dewey will often leave with him to spend the night in st. canard with gosalyn.

if you tell either of them a secret the other one WILL know. they can keep secrets from everyone except each other.

in the same vein, they tell each other all the gossip from their respective schools. dewey will come to visit and will turn to someone and go “so, jessica, how’s your boyfriend?” it never fails to freak out literally everyone who doesn’t know them that well.

they fight to be the flower girl in drake and launchpad’s wedding. gosalyn wins and dewey doesn’t talk to her for eight hours (this is a long time for them)

[trekmupf]

a.k.a. Kirks evil twin needs a hug

Pro:

The Dog alien, iconic, beautiful

I know it was done to easily differenciate the two Kirks, but Kirks eyeliner slays

Bones everyday doctoring. Look I know in fic and memes people often say his bedside manner sucks, and with his friends it does yes because they're his friends and they're idiots, but his general doctor scenes are lovely

Kirk manhandling McCoy and McCoy sending Spock after him later

The way Kirk assures and takes care of Sulu / the landing party show more of his good qualities as a leader to his crew

Spocks heritage being talked about for the first time, interesting early ideas about him being stuck between both sides

The invention of the vulcan nerve pinch!

First proper „He's dead, Jim“ by McCoy!

Kirks halfs literally having to accept each other in a way in the end and hugging

Classic transporter malfunction

I like that they call evil Kirk the imposter - even though it's part of him everyone knows that he would never behave this way and that the "good" Kirk is closer to his real self

the general idea of splitting a person into opposing halves, even though the exact philosophy is muddled when analyzed deeper (yes, the message is a human being needs the good and bad, but – see cons)

Spocks speech about command underlines the kind of pressure Kirk is constantly under due to his position (something he handles well usually, and it gets adressed a few times thoughout tos)

Generally the dynamic between the trio and how trust works between them, especially in the transporter room in the end

love a classic „who is the real one“ duplicate situation

Con:

The entire violent scene between the imposter and Yeoman Rand is horrific and I personally find it to be longer than necessary to get the point across

also the way they treat her is too shitty for words. Even considering the production time it's bad, and I dislike all the scenes heavily

we're not gonna talk about Spock's last line. OOC. He would never.

The last third feels a bit streched

As said above, the split itself is very muddied philosophically and politically – I'd say is less good / evil and more base urges & survival instinct / higher developement, intelligence, which would make more sense as you do need both to function and one to control the other. Otherwise the message is you need „evil“ to function and thats just. No good.

also like. "sensitive" kirk does make decisions at the end and is also the brave one? it kinda undermines what they're trying to say

also the way it's presented goes a bit into the toxic masculinity philosophy that only a forceful / aggressive man can make proper decisions, when we know that's not at all true in Kirk (or the other men)

Sulu is us at @ every dog we encounter

Counter:

Kirk being shirtless (and posing in front of Spock with his little towel)

Transporter malfunction

A LOT of Kirk / Shatner Memes stem from this episode

Also the dog-alien is its own meme

Quote: "You're the captain of this ship. You haven't the right to be vulnerable in the eyes of the crew. You can't afford the luxury of being anything less than perfect. If you do, they lose faith and you lose command" - Spock

Moment: Kirk getting ready to beam down the reunite with himself and the almost silent conversations with his friends Summary: Interesting episode that raises a few questions about what makes a person who they are but can't fully answer them while giving further insight into the trios relationships as well as Kirks personality - beware the assault and treatment of the female character afterwards though.

Previous Episode - Next Episode - All TOS Reviews

[aachria]

I have MANY things to say about chapter 96 so this is gonna be long-ish but you deserve every word of praise I'm about to type so buckle the fuckle up.

First of all, the dance scene with Usopp and then Luffy? Great, spectacular, outstanding, the way Ed understands Luffy so well like THAT is my otp and I am so fucking proud of them.

SECOND OF ALL. SANJI. Not only do you give that boy a scene tackling his bisexual (gay?) awakening but also a little platonic smooch that he so desperately needed? And then you give us ART of that scene? It feels so good but also I'm crying. Side note, Sanji definitely smokes Pall Malls, I can smell them from here.

Third of all, you write Brook so, so well. All I could get from him talking about Yorkie was that those two were SO attached to each other and Brook sees so much of himself AND Yorkie in Ed and wants to make sure they're happy so so bad. I want to be him when I grow up.

And that Nami scene. *chef's kiss* magnificent. Ed may have left a sister behind when that Honda Civic hip checked them into a different reality but they definitely got a new one in Nami.

Anyway that's all I had to say, congrats on Ed being compared to the legend himself Jeremiah Cross, toodles

Buckle the fuckle up is, respectfully, fucking hilarious.

I LOVE ED AND LUFFY. They are two halves of the same idiot with complete opposite types of smart. They round each other off but also make each other stupider, 10/10 dynamic.

I struggled immense with drawing that kiss let me tell you. But like goddamnit I wanted art of it so I was damn well gonna fight through making it. Sidenote I’m a full supporter of the bi Sanji agenda. Just fyi.

I honestly didn’t think I’d have near as much fun writing Brook as I do. He is the silly old grandpa who is also your bestie you visit in the nursing home. I try to balance that with the off putting shit every so often because yes you SHOULD remember that’s a cryptid. I don’t think Yorkie gets the hype he deserves in canon, that mf was ride or (literally) die ok put some respect on his name. Just a music lovin guy livin his life.

As always absolutely adore Nami and her and Ed are such a special duo.

Thank you bestie xoxo

[the-gayest-show]

just finished all the remainder of the episodes of fop a new wish that i didn't finish (so crocker to the future to lost in fairy world) and i really liked it!

overall, banger after banger this show really is a fun one, nickelodeon better give em a s2 PLEASE THIS IS THE ONLY CURRENTLY RUNNING SHOW I HAVE-

episode reviews below!

Crocker to the Future: genuinely loved all the parascience things. I do 100% feel like that award for preserving in the face of adversity or whatever truly belonged to Crocker. my guy was at this for like. 10+ years! AND THAT"S JUST THE OG FAIRLY ODDPARENTS!!! MY GUY WAS ON HIS "fairies are real!!! trust me!!" thing for ENOUGH TIME FOR FOP A NEW WISH TO TAKE PLACE!!!!!! i'm so glad he (sort of) got to have the award in that ghost containment thing.

AJ in the episode was interesting but honestly major L for AJ. I thought he'd be like the next einstein, not a parascience mf. maybe Timmy Turner fucked him up a bit, who knows...

Battle of the Dimmsonian: Genuinely felt bad for Peri here. Like DUDE. You are stuck with this asshole kid (Dev I love you but be nicer plss) who just sorta demands things from Peri like all the damn time? poor kid. Reminds me of what Remy Buxaplenty had with his godparent but at least wandisimo had a semi-similar personality so it kind of worked. Not saying that Peri and Dev don't work, it might since Dev has been shown to be nice underneath but I can't stand the blatant mistreatment for now.

But also, damnnnn he IMMEDIATELY recognizes his parents and goes "oh shit" it's crazy how he managed to do that when they're fidget toys on a kid's backpack.

I also liked the whole back and forth thing ("Mom? Dad?" "Son?" etc), Cosmo being the only one to not do that is so true for him.

I wonder if Peri not seeing Cosmo and Wanda was intentional, we'll see!

Patty Possum's Party Playground: I almost thought this episode was gonna be like Five Night's At Freddy's or somethign with the animatronics but I guess not! I liked Patty Possum, she's so rad! I can defo see why Winn liked skateboarding after that. I love Cosmo and Wanda being certified idiots in this episode. They took "you can't use magic" seriously (as seriously as "oh Wanda shrunk into the claw machine so we could actually get a prize" can be) and stuck BOTH of their wands in the claw machine. If there's anything I love about this show, it's Cosmo and Wanda being two halves of a whole idiot. Truly can't function without magic fr fr I liked the gag of Hazel's dad literally being punctual as hell. That scene where he's like "oh it only takes 29 min and 30 seconds to get there" and then it hits 7:30 and he's panicking is so real (what if I headcanoned him as autistic. what then? just like me fr fr).

A Date To Remember: A really cute episode where Hazel essentially has to compete against Cupid (who looks like a baby now, I guess they got rid of his looks from the main series and gave them to Peri lol) [look how they untwinkified my boy /j] to make sure Hazel's parents fall back in love again. The ending where the parents think it was just another puppet show was crazy, wasn't expecting that tbh!

Lost In Fairy World: WE GOT THE FAIRY TRIO INTERACTING LET'S GOOOOOOO

It seems like their dynamic is basically just over protective coddling parents vs their son who really doesn't like it. But despite what I used to think before seeing this episode (that maybe Peri had some kind of resentment or something) it doesn't seem that way? Peri seems to like his parents overall and maybe even might enjoy the affection (if it weren't for the godkids there), but I get why he turned off the tracker and such. My guy wants independence! You go boy! Them sneaking in to Jorgan's office was really funny and stuff. I hope we'll see them all together in the next episodes because I like their dynamic and want to see where it goes!

Dev and Hazel were great here too! Dev is still kind of an ass to Peri but not as much which is an improvement! I like how he gets that "dimmadome face" or whatever it was called where he basically looks as deranged as his dad. Like father, like son I guess. Dev and Hazel actually having fun together is a step up from where they used to be, it seems like they solved their argument somehow. Dev sort of took that to mean that they weren't friends anymore, poor thing.

Dev taking advantage of the loopholes is so smart lol, Peri having a crisis and his parents like "AWWW, baby's first loophole wish!" is crazy.

The rule that "you can only go to fairy world if you're being tested by jorgan" doesn't really make sense if you think about original FOP though. Timmy got to go there almost recreationally! Dude probably attended like 90% of all fairy world events and shit and he was the talk for the town for an entire episode! Make it make sense!!!

Overall tho I LOVED these and they were enjoyable af. Would watch again. Judging by what I saw for descriptions of the next episodes, Peri's anti fairy (or Foop, now known as Irep, which if you ask me doesn't have the same ring to it) will be working with Dev? Crazy. Anyways yeah I had a lot of fun and woah this post got kinda long

[sunshinebingo]

My Gwyn Week 2024 Masterlist

Here is everything I wrote for Gwyn Week 2024. Every single fanfic/fanart/moodboard/other posted to celebrate Gwyn during this special week has been amazing. Did I mention the fanarts??? They are to die for!!! Check them out on @gwynweekofficial because they are incredible. Thank you to everyone who has managed this event. And cheers to Gwyn 🥂💙

Two Halves Apart - Chapter 1

A Choice - Lyra, mother of Gwyneth and Catrin, makes makes a difficult choice for the wellbeing of her twin daughters.

Day 1. Friends and Family - Two Idiots and a Bigger One

It is Gwyn's turn to be perplexed by the excessive antics of her chosen sisters. She doesn't know what the hell is so funny about her friendship with Azriel. But Emerie and Nesta find her cluelessness even funnier than her reactions to the Shadowsinger.

Day 2. Psyche - Gwyn Drabble

Based on chapters 23 and 24 of acosf

Day 3. Priestess - It begins with caring

Gwyn finds Azriel in a bad state after his return to the House of Wind. Not feeling worthy of her attention, Azriel tries to push her away. But she will not have it and insists on staying by his side.

Day 4. Adventure - Two Halves Apart - Chapter 2

A Journey - Gwyn and Catrin's individual journey through life.

Day 5. Powers - Flying Sparks

Gwyn gets frustrated during her lesson with Lucien as he tries to teach her to control her fire. It turns out that her biggest distraction is not her friends talking nearby, but the arrival of a certain Shadowsinger.

Alternative summary:- Literal sparks fly when Gwyn stares at the Shadowsinger.

Day 6. Alternate Universe - Fortuitous Encounter

Gwyneth attempts to find her way out of the woods in which she has gotten lost after being separated from her horse. Frustrated and muddy from the fall she has lamentably taken, she crosses path with someone who offers to help her; a Lord who also seems intent on toying with her patience.

Day 7. Free Day - After Date Night

Gwyn pulls Azriel in her bedroom when they come back from their date. It seems this night is about to end differently from their other nights.

[rosetylerspolycule]

The Doctor and Donna are both soo smart separately literal geniuses but once u get them together they share one braincell literally two halves of a whole idiot

[hyperfixations-ahoy]

The people (one person) have asked, so I shall provide: more Ivorren headcanons

You probably missed the mini Soren headcanon I posted right when my blog, so I’ll say it again: he doesn’t just name Endermen, he gives nicknames to everything

ex: “Ivor where’s Elizabeth?” “deep sigh Your notebook is on the kitchen table”

Building styles — Soren prefers style to practicality; Ivor focuses on function first and design after (he tries to add some style but it’s just lava or something equally bad)

Ivor LOVES gossip sessions. Like he’s not sure how it started but him, Petra, and Lukas spill all the tea

Similarly, he is also Ellegaard and Magnus’ relationship counselor, a job that never ends

”We’re breaking up!” And Ivor adds another tally to his list (they’ve said that hundreds of times)

They both missed a lot of ‘updates’ while in their respective seclusions, so they’ll constantly be like: what do you mean there’s a material stronger than diamond. what do you mean the warden is real. what is with these pink trees. what the fuck is a glow squid and why does it exist

Ivor is a Moobloom supporter, Soren knows he should hate the Glow Squid but just loves it too much to be angry

On a more serious note, they love each other’s voices. They’ll read out loud to each other, or Ivor will listen to the stupid little songs Soren comes up with (Gary may seem scary but he’s a swell guy 🔥🎶)

Living embodiments of the “we’re two halves of the same idiot” meme

Soren doesn’t think of himself as gay, or really anything in terms of sexuality (he’s been in the figurative and literal closet for years, “what is a pronoun and why are there so many”)

“Oh no, I’m not gay, I’m not interested in men except for this one here”

Meanwhile everyone except for Ivor himself knew which way the alchemist swung

Someone has definitely asked Ivor if he could make them testosterone/estrogen (insert whichever character you headcanon as trans here!)

They’re not married, because they don’t need to be. They don’t need a ceremony and a piece of paper to prove that they’re never leaving the other’s side again

I’m actually having so much fun with this, I would be happy doing more 👀👀

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

Doctor Who, but Chronologically 30

Okay OKAY so we have just watched the Christmas Armistice of 1914, but now we move on to one of my favourite episodes of ALL TIME. In fact, full disclosure, this is one of my favourite TV episodes of anything ever. This is one of my go-to options for comfort TV. If I’m ill and sad and cwtched up on the sofa, this is in the Emergency Elanor First Aid Kit. I love it. I love it so much that I will not be quoting any of it, because if I do, I will be posting the whole script. You cannot imagine the extent to which I had to sit on my hands so I wouldn’t do a full episode review accidentally.

It is 1926, my friends, and this is the Unicorn and the Wasp.

Tennant and Donna are back!!!! DREAM TEAM. We haven’t seen them since they were running around Pompei in episode one, my lord that was a while back now. And Jesus, what a return to quality. The companions have been failing the Sexy Lamp Test for so long. The only break was Martha in the Human Nature two-parter, and that was an emotional wringer. But here!!! Donna!!! You could NEVER replace her with a sexy lamp. She is 1000% the co-protagonist. She and Tennant are best friends and they love each other intensely and platonically and they travel through time and SOLVE CRIME while being, at all moments and seconds of every single scene, two halves of a whole idiot, and it is joyful and wonderful and amazing.

Okay okay so

They land in a country manor in England, a part expertly played by Llansannor Court in Wales if I’m not much mistaken, and the interiors are 1000% Tredegar House because I know my Welsh country manors. The Doctor and Donna get ludicrously excited about going to a garden party in 1926, all giggly. They even go and get dressed up, by which I mean Donna does – she exits the TARDIS and gives a twirl.

“What do you think?” she teases. “Flapper, or slapper?”

“Flapper, definitely,” the Doctor beams. “You look lovely.”

… I am having violent flashbacks to Capaldi calling Clara ugly.

Anyway they meet Agatha Christie in time for an honest-to-god murder mystery. It’s fucking phenomenal. It’s silly and camp and the murderer is a giant wasp, except in true Agatha Christie style, there’s a complicated twist involving a secret pregnancy, an expensive gem, the hot young woman (played by her from Rogue One) actually being an accomplished jewel thief impersonating a socialite, and a prodigal reverend. One of these people is the aforementioned giant wasp, except the joyful sci-fi plot is really running around a playground with a balloon and giggling, so it has been primed to kill people in libraries with lead piping like a Cluedo game.

I literally cannot list every moment I love. It’s just too many. So I shall try to name check some top moments:

“MAIDEN”

“It was a good once”

“I am Inspector Smith from Scotland Yard, and Miss Noble is the plucky young girl who helps me”

“Copyright Donna Noble”

“Major snap out of it. No, right out of it –“

“HOW IS HARVEY WALLBANGER ONE WORD”

The ENITRE reveal scene holy shit

“Ah, let’s see, it’s filed under C” *box contains a Cyberman part, a Carrionite egg, a bust of Caesar, and cables*

Fuck. I just. *clenches fist* I love this episode so damn much

Okay so plot threads. Well! No new info about Donna’s back, unfortunately, so nothing to tick off there. Only, as ever, things to add. There’s a scene where Donna is comforting Agatha (and finding vital clues), and she explains that her last partner ran off with a giant spider. That’s a hell of a thing. Oh, also Donna made her second reference to bees disappearing. But that’s it.

Fuck me but I would burn so much Capaldi for so much more Tennant/Donna.

Anyway the list of plot threads is now going under a read more, Christ on wheels

“She” (an unknown person) is returning (perhaps River returned as Missy. Maybe Me? Maybe Clara???!)

There is something on Donna’s back

An entire planet, Pyrovilia, just… disappeared, somehow. (Maybe because the TARDIS is exploding??? Saturnine was also lost, and that WAS because of the TARDIS exploding. The lion man’s planet was also lost but he was a bit of a knob about it if I’m honest.)

Amy is maybe dead (she’s not)

The Doctor has been cubed (he’s out, but how?)

River is possibly blown up  (unless she’s Missy)

The TARDIS has blown up  (It’s fine now. Except it’s sort of melting now because it’s corrupted, but it’s fine again)

The universe appears to have ended  (the universe is back again)

The Doctor has employed(?) Nardole

(And Nardole was “reassembled???” Nardole had glass nipples and invisible hair?? WHAT THE FUCK IS HE)

There’s a vault in the TARDIS and it contains Missy but we don’t know why (sometimes she knocks for the bants)

What has happened to all these companions and where are the new ones coming from?

There’s an immortal Viking girl now. Her name is Me and she’s now looking after the people the Doctor abandons

What’s With The Silence?

Why was Rory entirely unconcerned by the entire world suddenly going silent when that is Not Normal and should have been, at the very least, extremely disconcerting?

What did the Doctor do to Queen Lizzie One?

Who is Captain Jack Harkness? (Is he the one who gave the companions a warning about the lone cyberman?)

Why is Amy seeing a one-eyed woman in a vanishing window?

What’s with the Doctor’s future involving getting shot by an astronaut?

Is Amy pregnant and why is it inconclusive?

Who is Sarah-Jane Smith?

How is the Doctor Bill’s teacher and why/where does he have an office?

What is going on with the Cyber War and the Cyberium???

Who did the Doctor lose to Cyber Conversion?

What happened with the Other Cyber War?

What happened with the Third War that deleted the void?

Why does Rose seem particularly important?

What’s with the Weeping Angel statues, and why can’t you blink at them?

What order do these Doctors go in? (Eccleston, Tennant, uncertain, Smith, Capaldi, Whittaker)

Which companion just… forgot the Doctor, and how?

Yaz and Vinder are about to die as Mori/Mwri/Muuri

There is a Lupari shield around Earth.

What’s a Time War?

What’s the Rift?

What’s Bad Wolf?

What happened with Amy’s pregnancy?

In which war did the Doctor become a war criminal, and how?

Who is the Master?

Why has Amy forgotten Rory?

Is Rory plastic or not?

Why is the Doctor sulking on a cloud?

How exactly does the Doctor have a cloud?

What exactly happened with Strax to, uh, tame him?

Which friend killed Strax?

Which friend brought Strax back?

Where did this lesbian lizard and human couple come from?

What happened with Clara as Souffle Girl and the Daleks?

How does Clara actually join?

Why so many Claras?

Why is Missy apparently in robo-heaven?

Why is probably!Missy pushing Clara and the Doctor together?

What is Trensilor and what happened there?

Who is Handles?

The Doctor is about to be dissolved by a beautiful geode man

The universe is being crushed by the Flux

Will the Doctor open the fobwatch?

Sontarans are invading Earth again

Who is Kate?

Who is Osgood? Another name of Clara’s again?

The fuck is the deal with the Grand Serpent

Does Martha get to go to an ice cream planet with 12-fingered massage aliens?

How did the Doctor forget Clara?

Who is Bill’s puddle girlfriend Heather?

How did Nardole die?

When does Bill get Cyberman-ed and die?

When does the Doctor shrink and enter a Dalek called Rusty?

Whittaker is falling to her death rn

Was that ring relevant?

Does anyone know the Doctor’s name?

When did Yaz talk to Dan about fancying the Doctor?

When did Dan talk to the Doctor about fancying Yaz?

Who was the Doctor’s wife?

What's happening with the bees?

What happened with Donna's ex and a giant spider?

[vrmxlho]

oh oh maybe!!! fluff with oikawa and a reader with very squishy cheeks. i'll let u decide what you'd like to do with that hehe

-mod zenith

as someone who has friends with really squishy cheeks i get the appeal, they feel like little pillows its adorable +++ but also this is super short and i apologise cuz idk wtf to write and i was on my lil flight to amsterdam so 🙄🙄

sends you pics of chipmunks with nuts in their mouth telling you it looks like you

every fucking day you wake up and its another one of those stupid photos

it's gotten to the point where you have him blocked on a lot of social media until he learns

however,

if y'all ever get in a fight and you're giving him the silent treatment he would literally die

no ofc he doesn't care about talking to you 🙄

HE CARES ABOUT THOSE SQUISHY CHEEKS

HOW IS HE SUPPOSED TO GIVE YOU KISSES AND STUFF??

he honestly hates admitting defeat, but he'll apologise in an instant if it means he can squish your cheeks again

and if you still aren't having it he's just gonna pinch your cheeks until you're sick of him pestering you

he's really fucking annoying if you didn't notice

but also at the same time if you’re the type of person to puff your cheeks when you’re frustrated or annoying or just being petty

he’s gonna go out of his way to get you riled up and annoyed

the devil couldn’t get to you so he sent oikawa instead

his favourite thing to do is to pinch a circle of your cheek and poke it constantly

(idk if you’re getting the image but trust)

now for the origin story aka his reaction when he found out just squishy your cheeks were

oikawa and you had been dating for about two months now. there was no doubt that those two months were some of the best times you’d ever had. but there was still a bit of awkwardness between the two of you. there was a distance you didn’t understand, and you knew he felt it too. it’s not like he hid secrets from you, or that he was emotionally unavailable and didn’t disclose any of his feelings. no. it was mostly the fact that the two of you hadn’t kissed yet. nowhere. not the cheek, not the forehead, and of course not the mouth. it’s not like you didn’t do any touching, in-fact you were constantly hugging each other and holding hands. but the thought of kissing made the two of you blush like idiots and act like stupid children. you were stupid children. but today was different. you felt different. it was your 12th date, it was at the arcade, there was some big prize this weekend and oikawa was keen to get it for you, even if you simply didn’t care. so, you put on your favourite outfit and made your way to the date. there was a new photo booth opening that day. gosh it was like the whole place was being renovated just for your date. so of course, you obliged. it was a bit cramped but you made it work. you were sitting on his lap. the first one was just a sweet smile. the second a heart you made with both your hands acting as the two halves. the third was a silly one, your tongue sticking out and eyes shut yet smiling. but the fourth one was different. it was almost like time had slowed down. you felt oikawa shift a bit under you and as the bright flash blinded you, you felt his lips on your soft cheeks. before you could react he pulled away, looking at you a bit puzzled. then he kissed your cheek again. and again. and again. then his face lit up. “they’re like pillows.” “oh shut up.