#they are impossible and painful and beautiful

[zylusmusings]

Zayne, whose fingers tremble while he holds your face tenderly in his hands, lets out a shaky exhale as his green-hazel eyes stare at your face. He notices the sun spots, the blemishes and scars and he loves each and every one of them. They’re spectacular and unique features that make them you, his obsession runs deep - his heart beats in sincerity and adoration for your ‘imperfections’ — they add to your beauty.

He’s almost overwhelmed by your presence, positively bewildered that he gets to call the beauty of venus and saturn, the magnificent miracles of the sun and the moon, his lover. And just how spoiled is he in this life to be given the privilege of holding this eighth wonder of the world in his two hands.

His two hands that are a map of different scars and countless stories of pain and anguish. And with you in his hands, Zayne marvels at this paradox.

“You… are everything,” he sighs, his head shaking subtly. “Not just to me. You are everything.” It was important to Zayne that you understood that — you could very well be a stranger to him — you would still be everything. The world would continue to turn, showered with the bliss of your kindness and courage. “I understand the world may be unkind yet it knows that it’ll be in penury if it were to be without you. Do you understand that, my Jasmine?” As attentive as he is while conducting surgery, he stares just as intently into your tear glazed ones, as if there are books written in the swirls of your orbs and he’s determined to learn and dissect every line. He wants to absorb it all, understand how such negative self-perception could ever dip its toes into your mind — you are so beautiful and wonderful (inside and out)!

But until he figures this impossible puzzle out, he’ll settle on bringing the cheer back into your eyes. Zayne is a healer in essence, evident in his occupation as well as this current moment.

His gentle caress is a medicine of its own, his loving words the sweetest treat to make up for the pain. “But if the world chooses to be ungrateful to you today, allow me to remind you that you are my anchor and rock. You have brought so much ease and grounding to my life. I simply wish to be the same for you.” His voice is barely over a whisper, he is determined to protect the fragile bubble you are in now. You are a strong and fearless person, no doubt about that, but tonight you are vulnerable, anxious and fragile — and that is okay. Zayne is here.

“Cry if you have to,” he nods reassuringly, delicately pulling your face to face his when you pull away, tightness bubbling in your chest at his shower of intense affection. “You cannot scare me away.” He repeats his actions and sentiment through words directly this time.

Your bottom lip quivers, and it doesn’t take long for the water works to begin. Zayne is your favourite place to be, and not just because of the last bite of dessert that he saves for you, the back massages he spoils you with after a long day of work (despite his own of hours-long surgeries) or the bills that he pays. But because he allows you to be craven once in awhile, to be imperfect, to tire… and love you all the same.

[expectiations]

The Doctor and River Song’s love story is not cheap laughs. It is not shallow. It is not fetishization. It is artfully tragic, beautifully timey-wimey, and deeply emotional. Steven Moffat crafted something extraordinary in giving the Doctor a love interest like River—someone who embodies complexity, agency, and a heartbreaking devotion to a man who would choose her as much as she’d choose him.

In "The Wedding of River Song," River doesn’t just marry the Doctor. She declares the immensity of her love. She tells him how much he is cherished, how much she loves him beyond anything or anyone in the universe. And what does the Doctor do? He stops running. He finally puts a ring on it. He chooses her as much as she chooses him. There’s even a comic tied to that episode showing him seriously considering letting time collapse around them—destroying the universe—just to live a linear life with his wife. That’s not comedy. That’s pathos. That’s the depth of their devotion, wrapped in impossible choices.

In "Forest of the Dead," River gives up her life to save the Doctor, knowing that her death is the reason they’ll have a life together. She sacrifices herself, fully aware that her death is the linchpin to the love story they’re writing together. Without her final act of love, there is no “them.” River’s death becomes the foundation of their story. "You and me. Time and space. You watch us run."

In "The Name of the Doctor," we learn something extraordinary: even though the audience hasn’t always seen River, the Doctor always has. Every little thing—every moment of music, every whisper of memory—is her. "The music room is the heart of the home." (in "Hide" and the ever so fleeting, flickering pain that crossed his face) "The long song is over." (in The Rings of Akhaten) She is always there for him, and he never forgets her. "You are always here to me. And I always listen. And I can always see you." An apology, a gesture of gratitude, and a vow of eternal love. If that isn’t love, what is?

"The Husbands of River Song" finds River grieving the loss of her parents. She’s raw, vulnerable, and trying to convince herself that the Doctor doesn’t love her. But when she says that, it isn’t a fact—it’s her grief speaking. And the Doctor’s "Hello, Sweetie" is more than just a balm for her wounds. It’s a quiet affirmation that he sees her pain and will stand beside her in it. He already watched her die, and still, he is there, grasping for every stolen moment they can share. That’s not a joke—it’s a testament to their bond.

Yes, their timeline is chaotic. Yes, the story is messy. That’s the point. It’s not linear—it’s timey-wimey, just like them. Their love isn’t about clean resolutions or easy endings. It’s about devotion in the face of impossibility. It’s about choosing each other despite Time itself tearing them apart. And even then, Time can't help but show them the "what if" of a linearly lived life.

Are there flaws in the writing? Sure. Could their story have been developed better? Maybe. But to dismiss River Song’s character as just cheap laughs and fetishization misses everything she stands for. She is the Doctor’s equal, his partner, and his match. And their love story—tragic, hilarious, heartbreaking, and beautiful—deserves better than to be dismissed as anything less.

the doctor and river song are unironically one of the most tragic love stories in modern media, but they keep getting undermined by writing that would rather go for cheap laughs and badly hidden fetishisations instead of fully leaning into the pathos of time travellers who keep meeting their soulmate in the wrong order

[valentine-cafe]

im drooling for some haoyu 9948v ANGST

maybe haoyu getting bored of reader and decides to just. (kill) get rid of them. he's like 'ok whatever not my problem' then sometime after it just SNAP! clicks.

he killed you and now hes not gonna find anyone like you again

˖⁺. ﹙ bloodthirsty phantom  x gn reader. ﹚ .𖹭 ݁

. . . dull eyes !! 🍒 :  phantom ˖ yandere ˖ vngeful spirit character﹙ verse 9948v hàoyǔ. ﹚

you always knew that someone like him would eventually be your demise. what happens when a being such as him gets bored of you ? | cw: reader death 

It had all been nice at first. Well, that’s how you remembered it.

The inafmous phantom of your world, hauntingly beautiful, yet dangerous, murderous. With all the intent to snap anyone’s neck that came in his way. Bathe in their blood.

You remember the first time his eyes landed upon you, the obssessive gazes and the suddeness of when he stole you away. Kept you in his abode for none to see or visit. His beautiful prize. Your soul most addictive to him.

He huffed you like you were a drug to get high on after every murdering spree.

It got to your head that he never once hurt you. No, he protected, kept you safe and sound. Sure, he was and is manipulative but. . . You could manage, you had him, right?

Why should you miss your old family and friends— You are his, and he is yours. He wouldn’t get bored of you.

Alas. As malicious and godlike as he is. His animalistic hunger convinced him otherwise. You weren’t much more than a toy. You weren’t his cerise, nor were you that interesting to begin with.

A past-time soul to take away the boredom.

And when you suddenly no longer took that boredom away — that’s when you noticed the signs, his nonchalance around you. The sudden threats to snap you in half, the agitation he suddenly displayed to you like it. The same he shows to everyone.

What was it you had done wrong? You never really figured it out. An impossible task to do so nontheless.

It was incomprehensible for your mortal brain to understand his.

You lay in bed now, sleeping soundly. Yet to know the fate coming for you.

Oh how the angels weep for it, whichever poor guardian that wards you, begs for you to awake. It is not possible to hear. Not with the barriers of the realms.

And your intuition has been shattered long ago.

The door creaks open. Heavy footsteps moving towards the side of the bed, alongside the strong smell of iron that reeks off of your beloved.

Blood covered fingers trail down your spine, while a freezing pair of lips press against the lobe of your ear. Breath sighed onto your warm skin.

“How unfortunate you cause me such boredom.” He whispers. Might as well take you out in your sleep. The screams may have been delightful. But why not let you dream instead. They say the dead can still hear a bit before their soul has gone away.

Doubtless he will have any use of that either way as well. Perhaps he should simply suffocate it when it floats aimlessly above you. Awaiting reaping.

No reaper comes into this household.

“Hàoyu.” You groggily call, as you rouse from your sleep. Eyes groggy and full of heavy sleep still.

Poor you, barely able to process the teeth that rip out your throat and the long talons that rip through your skin and bones like they are nothing.

What quick and painful death, the blood spraying everywhere. You don’t get to see it, as he so violently tears you apart. Like a feral animal. Laughing as though it is some funny joke to him.

And when it is all over, and he is holding your corpse in his arms. He strokes a thumb across your face and tuts. “Its nothing personal, hm?” A little chuckle rumbles through his chest as he drags you out to the yard, where the rest of his past loves lay beneath the earth.

Yet. As day by day pass by. And he returns from the long sprees with his cultists. He settles down in the lounge of his manor, and awaits your presence each and every time.

A strange feel arises in his chest. Is it sorrow?

No, surely not. . . He was bored, why would he suddenly begin missing? What had been that different about you in contrast to all of his other lovers?

And as a month, perhaps two? What does perception of time matter to him - passes by, it dawns upon him. He was missing you. He was grieving the loss of you of which he bore on his hands. The murder of you.

Waiting, you had been waiting for him to come join you that night. After all of the ruthless threats, ignoring and snapping he had been taking out on you.

Was it boredom? Or had it been the part of him that just thirsted for blood instead?

He no longer knew.

One thing was for sure, you weren’t coming back. Your soul left without a trace after your death. The violent and malicious magic that tore through you suffocated it completely. There is no afterlife for you. There is no you anymore—

And he can try as much as he wants to, to find you again. In every cultist, person he may randomly stumble into. Someone with your eyes, your smile, your laugh, your kindness. But he can’t. Because it isn’t you.

He wants you.

[alternative-ffa]

TRAPPED - Part One

You thought you were mobile. Years of living on your own, and no access to a scale that could weigh you... you were sure you were only 550lbs; maybe 600. You splurged on a bariatric scale years ago, but it only went up to 500lbs. So, you just had to guess what your weight was once the scale became inadequate.

Your bedroom had been moved to the living room years ago, once the doorways in the hallway became too tight for you to squeeze through. Your full bathroom was one of those doors... and you felt the annoyance of not having access to a shower. You were lucky there was a half bath with a barn style sliding door that you could squeeze though to at least use the toilet... not that the toilet was built for your size. You jury-rigged encyclopedias by each side of the toilet, so they could help hold your weight. Your fat fell to each side of you, and these old books helped take the heaviness of your huge belly and rear end, so the toilet didn't crack.

Almost everything in your home was adapted to your extreme obesity. Once you realized that you could no longer squeeze your fat body through your bedroom door, you were smart enough to order a bariatric hospital bed for your living room.

The day it was delivered and set up was an embarrassing one. You never felt embarrassed by your size when you were alone (which was most of the time). But standing there, with your cane to steady your body, watching them bring the bed in... dealing with stares from the delivery men... it was not your finest hour.

You were grateful for the bed. It increased your ability to be comfortable in your home. But it didn't fix the loneliness. You are only 38 years old, and yet you felt as though you're 60+... no family, no friends who visit... you are alone.

Nights are the hardest. It's when you dreamt of love. Of a beautiful woman who would enjoy your company. You don't need someone to enjoy your body... in fact, you feel that that would be impossible. So you just want to settle for someone who would love you despite your morbid obesity. Each night you dream of that ideal, and each morning you get punched in the face with your reality.

You have no idea that there are women out there who would do anything for intimacy with a beautiful man as fat as you. In fact, you are so uninformed that you have no idea women like that exist. You've given up on the possibility of intimacy.

Your life suddenly changed. You rolled yourself out of bed, like usual; your fat feet touching the floor. Using your cane, you lifted yourself to a standing position. Once you were standing, you had no problem waddling into the kitchen. At least, this was the usual daily procedure. But this particular day was not to be easy.

You filled a pot with water, preparing to make pasta. Standing by the stove, suddenly you felt a sharp pain in your left ankle. You had a high pain tolerance, but this was too much. You gripped the counter to try and stay standing, but there was no hope... and you succumbed to the pain and fell to the floor.

You wanted to shout for help... realizing that you had no ability to get off of the floor. But no one could hear you. You are alone.

Days passed. The only reason you stayed alive was the pot of water you had filled before the fall. On day 2, you used all your energy and strength to grab it, knowing that it would be a long time before help arrived. You rationed the water. Taking sips every now and then.

You couldn't reach your phone, you couldn't call for help... so you hoped that the mailman would notice that the mail was piling up.

You were lucky your mailman was aware that you were a shut-in. After 3 days of mail piling up, he called for a wellness check.

You were weak, embarrassed and ashamed. But you felt a tinge of relief when you heard emergency services at your door... "Hello? Do you need help?"

You screamed, "please! I'm in here!"

You heard them pounding the door down. Although you knew you needed help, you didn't want your front door damaged; but it was too late.

Emergency personnel poured into your home. They found you, laying in your own waste in the kitchen, trapped on the floor where you've been for 3 days.

You disassociated the whole time they were there since it was the only way your mind had to protect yourself: hazmat teams cleaning the floor AND you; male nurses and EMTs using inflation lifts to help you into a standing position. You couldn't stand. Your ankle was broken. It took eight men to help you back into your bed.

You resisted the reality of being too fat to move. But with your ankle, it was a reality you had to confront.

Once you were in your bed, they informed you that a doctor would be by the next day. Then they left. You were trapped: alone, lonely, and discouraged. Knowing your ankle was broken, and you'd have to wait at least twelve hours to be seen by a doctor, you cried.

The sun rose like usual the next day. You used to enjoy the light coming through your window... but now, you felt anxiety. A knock on the door caused your heart to skip a beat in your chest.

A female nurse and a older male doctor entered. You hadn't seen a woman in years, and for the first time in a long time, your dick stood at attention. You blushed, feeling your penis throbbing under the fat of your crotch. But you knew you were too fat for anyone to notice, even if they had lifted your belly.

An erect penis on a man as fat as you can only be described like a throw pillow with a button in the middle. Your dick was the button... barely seen beneath the fat pad. You thought you were impotent; but gazing at a beautiful woman proved you wrong.

The doctor spoke, but you barely listened. Another man walked in with a gigantic scale. You could only watch as they set it up and tried to convince you to stand. They knew your ankle was broken, but finding out how much you weighed was quite important. Being held up by two strong men, they had your good foot on the scale and slowly released their hold to get an accurate measurement.... you watched in horror as the numbers climbed... 500, 600, 700.... then it settled at 825lbs. You gasped. Tears began to fall. You weren't sure if it was because of the pain, or if it was because you had no idea you had gotten that fat. You were sure you were only 550... maybe 600. So seeing the numbers climb to 825lbs instilled absolute terror.

The doctor and nurses left the room once they had you back in your bed. You could hear them talking, but couldn't make out what they were saying. You heard the front door open and close and the voices dissipated; then the clicking of high heels on the floor became louder and louder until the female nurse was by your side.

You weren't sure how to react. This was the woman who caused your dick to stand at attention. You tried to pretend you weren't aroused. She had long black hair, bright hazel eyes. Even making eye contact with her made you look away immediately. She smiled at you... a kind smile, implying she was there by choice.

But you refused to believe it. No one would spend time with you by choice. So you fought any kind of attention she gave you.

Laying in your bariatric bed, she pulled a chair over from your dining room. She placed it next to your bed and sat; still smiling kindly at you. You didn't know what to say. You spent the last five years alone, and had no practice in speaking to another person. For her, silence felt awkward, so she spoke: "I'll be here with you for my shift; so the next twelve hours. I hope this is okay."

You wanted to say, "I'd love the company. I don't have visitors. I think you're beautiful. I haven't seen a woman in ages..."

But instead, you grunted in acknowledgement.

The silence felt deafening. She spoke, "is there anything I can get you?"

You hesitated; breathing deeply, you said, "Would you mind getting me a drink? I have some whiskey in the cabinet... maybe two shots and an ice cube?"

She smiled at you again and said, "Sure."

You watched as she stood from the chair and turned towards the kitchen. You couldn't help but stare at her body as she walked away. She was thin and thick in all the right places. You couldn't help but stare at her rear... perfect childbearing hips that caused a primal arousal in you. Your dick throbbed again beneath your fat. It was an experience you hadn't had in years. There was nothing that could arouse you when you were alone: which was all the time. You couldn't tell whether you were pleased that your manhood worked, or disappointed.

Finally feeling arousal for the first time in years was pleasant at first, until you realized that it was all for nothing. You were too fat for sex... not that you felt there could possibly be any opportunity for that kind of intimacy with her.

She returned with your drink, and to your surprise, she had a drink of her own. She sat next to you and said, "I hope you don't mind if I join you." As she lifted her glass.

You felt joy. For only a moment. You tried to avoid eye contact so she wouldn't pick up on your arousal....

To be continued...

[dead-dolphins]

“𝓛𝓲𝓽𝓽𝓵𝓮 𝓕𝓸𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓽 ”

or the eremika mountain girl and doctor’s son au 💚

Summary: In the quiet mountains of Paradis, Mikasa’s sheltered life changes when young doctor Eren Jaeger arrives at her home. As their love blooms, the looming war for independence against Marley forces them to face impossible choices.

The mountain girl:

Mikasa is a young girl who has lived her entire life in a secluded villa in the mountains of Paradis.

The villa is isolated, surrounded by the serene beauty of nature, far removed from the bustling outside world.

Raised amidst this solitude, she has little experience with the complexities of life beyond the mountains.

After losing most of her family to tragedies, she now lives with her beloved grandmother, the last surviving member of her family.

The doctor’s son:

Eren is a passionate and driven doctor, deeply invested in research and discovery.

Dissatisfied with the constraints and limited opportunities in Marley, he decides to travel to Paradis, where he finds a home since his mother is from there.

His father, an old doctor, had once lived in this region many years ago, inspiring Eren to follow in his footsteps.

He takes up residence as a guest in Mrs. Ackerman’s humble mountain home, seeking both peace and inspiration for his work.

He finds the villa’s rustic charm and breathtaking scenery an ideal setting for his studies, but it soon offers much more than he anticipated.

The mountain girl and the young doctor

Neither Mikasa nor Eren has ever experienced love before; both are strangers to romantic feelings.

Their first meeting is transformative, as they each feel an unexpected warmth toward the other.

Eren is captivated by Mikasa’s beauty and the mystery surrounding her.

Mikasa finds herself drawn to Eren’s kindness, intelligence, and determination.

As they spend more time together, their hearts begin to thaw, and an unfamiliar bond starts to grow between them.

The perils surrounding them:

Their budding relationship develops amidst a tense and volatile period in Paradis.

The nation is on the brink of revolution, as Paradis seeks to break free from Marley’s oppressive rule.

Whispers of rebellion spread across the land, signaling that the war for independence is fast approaching.

Even the remote mountains, once untouched by the outside world, begin to feel the weight of this conflict.

As their love deepens, they both face harrowing decisions to ensure their survival in the chaos of war.

The growing conflict puts their lives and Mikasa’s grandmother in imminent danger, forcing them to make painful sacrifices.

They must decide whether to stay in the villa, risking capture or violence, or leave behind the only home Mikasa has ever known.

[im-that-onebitch]

Hidden Marks

"I knew it was you. The brightest soul there. Even with Forty years, your soul had not darkened.”

“I find that hard to believe.” He chuckled lightly, as if the very notion were foreign and ridiculous.

“There were a couple of spots, but it was the most beautiful, despite them. Because of. Like a thousand sunrises layered on top of each other. Bright and seemingly impossible, but the most amazing thing I’d ever seen.”

“You’ve seen a lot of things,” Dean spoke in a hoarse whisper.

“And yet…” Cas smiled lightly, wistful.

OR

Newly human Cas, post-s8 finale, talks to Dean about the pain, the handprint, and dealing with his loss.

Word Count: 3,583

Rating: G

[digitaldiary]

january 9th, 2024

last year I so desperately clung to the idea of love, scared of being alone and single and wishing for nothing more than to be proven wrong by the universe in the form of a perfect man to love. he never arrived, and I’ve entered into the cold new year a cold new woman, shedding the skin of a lover girl I’ve been birthed into something more functional and mechanical. a new invention beautiful in its own right!

I’m sure the lover girl in me is not dead, just hibernating until someone stirs me, but i never expected it to be so refreshing and relieving to let go of love. I always fought tooth and nail because I thought that if I gave up on love, then it would become impossible for me. I still think love is possible but I’m no longer fiending for it. life is mysterious and strange and if I am lucky and life is kind, then I’m sure love will find me even when I swear I’m unlovable.

now removed from the drama of romantic escapades (most of which are molehills of attention turned into mountains of desperation), my life is boring. very boring. but it’s my boring simple life without the toxic erratic pains of romance and desperation. and so it is a peaceful life that I am coming to love.

[lemonboywriter]

Little snippet lol @jumpy-buggy-33

-----

Ever since Xiaotian was little, he loved his baba!

So much so he went out to find the shinest rocks and the most beautiful flowers of the island to gift to him! He came back to the cave, skipping happily when he saw his baba and a man in black robes, he hid behind the pillar.

He tried to hear them through his four ear, but the conversation was already over, a black spike formed from the ground, a orange light emitting from it, hitting his baba straight in the chest.

Xiaotian couldn't do much but stare.

His baba was in pain, he could tell that much, but why?

He practically was scratching his eyes out, blood dribbling down his cheeks as he sobbed. He kept repeating Xiaotian's name, as if something bad was going to happen to him.

Xiaotian didn't understand much at the age of four, but what he did know, whatever the Man in the Black Robes did to his baba, he'll pay tenfold.

Prolouge end-

Start-

Xiaotian was officially six! He was happy with that and he could even reach the stove now without a big chair! He only needs a little on now, meaning he can properly start cooking like he and baba had in the past.

Although he was a little sad that his baba couldn't see properly anymore, couldn't be as happy anymore, couldn't do as much before. Xiaotian will gladly take care of him just like his baba took care of him.

He knew when his glowing eyes were on, he would be able to see, but it wouldn't last very long because it made Baba's eyes sting and water. So he only used it to make food but soon that was impossible for him to do.

The gentle kind words his baba would murmur to Xiaotian just made him more determine to take care of his baba, and the Man in the Black Robes.

He even knew how to fight properly, but disposing of a body was harder than it looks. He knew his baba wouldn't like him fighting and killing, but he couldn't see him now. So he had no problem disposing of those who found out about his baba's weakness.

Of course, there was days Xiaotian couldn't do anything, and today was one of those days. It sucked, getting a fever on his birthday, sucked.

He cried many times.

He was cold, so cold. He couldn't step out of bed without any sort of blankets or jackets or socks because it felt so cold and it hurt. If that wasn't enough, his whole body hurt after every little movement and he hated it!

He hated every piece of it.

Only one piece of it would be pure.

His baba, he would stay next to him until it was all over.

Xiaotian sniffed, "It isn't fair.." His baba hummed. As he squeezed out water from a cloth before putting it on Xiaotian's forehead. "Nothing is ever fair, Xiaotian."  Xiaotian looked up to his baba, his baba was so pretty and kind, and no one will ever lay a single finger on him of Xiaotian has any say in it! "Still..." Xiaotion whined, his baba chuckled.

"How about I tell you a story?"

"A story? What's it about?" Xiaotian asked quietly, his throat was starting to hurt. "About your father," Xiaotian's eyes widened, he slightly nodded with excitement. He knew he had another parent who sadly passed away before he got to meet him. He liked the stories that his baba told of him, mainly because he sounded cool.

"Hm... let's see. The warrior..."

[4th-make-quail]

further answers to questions 16-27 below~ 💀💚🏹

16. What do they find most physically attractive about the other? Emmrich loves how big and soft and solid Caul is, and he has a huge soft spot for his nose and beard! Also his clever tinkerer's hands, especially when ink-stained :3 For Caul's side, he could watch Emmrich gesture with his hands all day, he fucking loves them and how elegant they are! He also loves the little creases next to his eyes, his eyes themselves, and especially his arse. Less poetic, that one, but very very true lol.

17. What do they find the most attractive about each other's personalities? Emmrich loves how Caul is honest, blunt and no-nonsense. His clarity of sight and how sharp he is; he finds it extremely refreshing. He's also incredibly soft for Caul's poetic soul, how he can find beauty in the smallest thing. Caul loves Emmrich's eloquence, his endless curiosity and thirst for knowledge, and how unbelievably kind he is.

18. What are some things that remind them of each other? Any time Emmrich smells gaatlok, he thinks of Caul. Any time he catches sight of the pure, fresh morning blue sky he thinks of Caul's eye; the deepest darkness of the Necropolis reminds him of Caul's void-eye. Gold reminds Caul of Emmrich, which is a bit of an obvious one! Also the scent of moss and skin-warmed leather; ink and the smell of books.

19. Does either of them have any form of non-verbal communication that the other is aware of? Oh yes, Caul's ears are extremely emotive and he can't always control their reactions - Emmrich picks up on this very quickly, though he's far too polite to call attention to it of course (also he thinks it's exceptionally cute). Later on, once Emmrich's seen Caul's tail, he also begins to pick up on how that moves with Caul's body language too.

20. What are some ways they behave differently around the other? Caul loses a little of his sharp edge, his aggression softens and he's less on guard - especially after Emmrich's finally seen his leg, seen all of him. It's like night and day to watch him with Emmrich and with others (outside of the Lighthouse crew ofc). Emmrich has a tendency to get distracted looking at Caul, especially if he's working on his guns, reading or writing. He also subconsciously leans towards him, and he can't stop himself from touching Caul's arm to help him up some stairs, or opening doors for him; just little physical touches and gestures all the time.

21. Who is more physically affectionate? In what way do they tend to show that affection? They're both as bad as each other! They often walk arm in arm together, Caul loves to wrap his arm around Emmrich's waist or press his hand to his lower back; Emmrich will hold Caul's hand, and find any excuse to be touching him. And they're both terrible for snatching kisses! Oh, Emmrich and Rook are lagging behind? Don't bother going to find them, they'll be in a doorway somewhere like teenagers. Disgusting.

22. How often do they argue? Who is usually more ready to compromise? Caul is incredibly stubborn and self-sufficient around his disability and when he's in pain, he becomes argumentative and prickly-sharp. In the beginning, Emmrich was likely to be overbearing with trying to look after him, and they had a little argument about it, but after that (and The Argument...) honestly they don't really tend to argue so much. They're kinda on the same wavelength, but for compromise it will often be Emmrich.

23. Who is more likely to become jealous? Do they act on it, or keep it to themselves? Caul, by a long shot unfortunately, and he's likely to make very pointed comments about it, tail lashing and ears like cat helicopter ears. But the Dead-Eye has a hell of a reputation, so honestly it doesn't happen often lol. No one wants to meet their end at an impossible distance in the night.

24. Who is more likely to protect the other when there is danger? Caul again, but only just! He's incredibly protective and will push himself too hard to make sure Emmrich doesn't get hurt. On the flip side, Emmrich always has one eye out for Caul and a restoration spell on the tip of his tongue, and will use his nastiest offensive spells if he sees Caul in danger.

25. Was there ever a moment where one side was weak and the other had to be strong for both? After Caul returned from the Fade, he was bowed by so much grief for Varric and Harding, and surviving that place left him wracked with pain. Emmrich is his rock in that time, knowing how to help him finally come to terms with the unknown grief for Varric, and the fresh, bleeding grief for Harding. He also helps Caul see that he can still continue with their mission, that he's not still stuck in the Fade and that he's real, that their relationship is real.

26. If they were to buy a gift for each other what would that gift be? They're both quite big gift givers as mentioned further up, but Caul buys Emmrich a beautiful, fine golden net of body jewellery to wear as one of his, accented with emeralds. He puts it on Emmrich and then gets to watch as Emmrich rides his cock >:3 Emmrich buys Caul a beautiful blank notebook for his poetry, and an enchanted pen to match, one with ink that flows constantly and never needs filling.

27. What would they consider to be an ideal date? A stately walk among some beautiful nature followed by a delicious meal and then curling up together in front of the fire to read with a very good glass of wine. And then finishing the evening off with a long, slow fuck of course.

Cos I've been doing this over on bsky and I wanna have it archived~

Questions 1-8 answered below!

They met during the first scene where you recruit Emmrich! Because Caul is a Crow, he's never had opportunity to meet him before, and none of his contracts took him to Nevarra

Caul's first impression was "oh the skull thing is cool" and, internally, "thank the gods, someone who's my age" lol. Underneath that he was attracted, and that increased when he saw Emmrich working his magic round the Necropolis during that first quest. Necromancy intrigues him! On Emmrich's side, he was surprised that this imposing, solid and quite dour Qunari needed his help, but delighted to find someone who showed an interest in his work and a respect for the dead, despite his career as a Crow. The good looks helped, and he found himself needing to know more!

Caul realised when he caught himself watching Emmrich one too many times, and then it was cemented when his thoughts turned to poetry around him. Their casual, fun flirtation was just that until Emmrich's kindness just seeped into his soul and didn't let go, and he realised he was Serious. Took him a while, but not as long as Emmrich, who thought that their flirtations were just that - fun between colleagues, nothing more. He realised the terrifying depths of his feelings after one battle where Caul got properly injured then finally relented and let Emmrich use healing magic. During which time, Caul also lets his guard down enough to let him finally see his scars - mostly his leg - which he keeps hidden. Relieved that Caul wasn't going to die and overcome with emotion at the trust he's showing, Emmrich admits to himself that his feelings are real. And scary......

The first move went as the game - Emmrich turned on the charm & kissed Caul within an inch of his life against that beautiful statue of the eternal lovers. It went very smoothly, Caul was already smitten & their tension was insane by that point - if Emmrich hadn't made the move, Caul would have!

Oops I answered this in #4 by mistake fkcmck I'm gonna skip ahead!

They were very handsy and physical before they finally fucked properly! The first sexual contact was Caul giving into his post-battle adrenaline high and sucking Emmrich silly, Emmrich sat on his desk and Caul in his chair just completely going to town and not stopping even after Emmrich came. For full sex it'd been building for a long time, but they never had time or the right moment. Emmrich finally sent everyone else on errands with strict instructions to not bother them, then fucked Caul gentle and slow in his huge comfy bed with scented candles and flower petals everywhere 💚

Their first date was as in game, Emmrich laying on a beautiful meal and wining & dining Caul with the full weight of his charm. Caul brought him flowers & a beautiful Antivan-made knife for ceremonial use & quite flustered Emmrich for a moment, then they kissed for like two hours in the moonlight.

Caul, without a doubt. Emmrich can't bring himself to admit it, let alone speak it out loud - he's afraid of the depth of his feeling, of what feels like an insurmountable gap between them (a Crow & a Watcher, who are they trying to fool?) & he's especially afraid of his mortality. Caul's a romantic type as is Emmrich, but he expresses it through his poetry & he'd given Emmrich enough of it by then to make his feelings clear, but he'd also never really said it outright until The Argument & even then it's only to accuse Emmrich of being scared to admit it. When he returns from the Fade prison, when they're alone in the Necropolis, he tells Emmrich just how much he loves him when they kiss, and continues to tell him while they fuck in the sarcophagus until Emmrich's flushed & whimpering, gazing into Caul's eyes as they make love

[clfixationstation]

I think this may be an unpopular opinion, but Mikasa kissing Eren's severed head is actually probably my favorite aspect of eremika. Something about the simplicity of Mikasa's unfettered love contrasted against the visceral gore of Eren's corpse

Just perfectly encapsulates their relationship and the theme of cruelty and beauty that Mikasa embodies

Cruel world, and her beautiful love, inseparable

[shizunitis]

I need to say this to binghe and you're the closest real life binghe I know so just hear me out will ya

No matter what society says of you, you are still very loved and I'm so happy that by the end of the novel, you got the happy ending that you deserved.

I'm so sorry that you sometimes feel unloved and unwanted. If I could've met you, I would've showered you with poems every day. Fate was too cruel to you and you deserve all the love the world has to offer.

I'm so glad you found a person who actually loves you for you. And that you didn't have to try to fill a void by collecting women and treasures like pokemons. I'm so happy that you're so happy.

I'm so sorry for how the world treated you before shen yuan transmigrated. No child should've been subjected to so much pain. And how the cultivation world treated you when you came out of the abyss.

I know that me apologizing for all the pain you suffered is fucking useless and stupid but I can't even give you a physical hug. So please just bear with me.

I'm so glad that now fate will be kinder to you and that you've finally found an anchor to ground you. Shizun is one lucky man. How I wish I could've pat your head and coodled you when you were crying but nevertheless your happiness is everything. Try to never be sad again, Luo Binghe.

Yours truly,

xxxxx

i feel it would be a bit inappropriate to complain that he's getting this message instead of me, so i'll let it go this once. just this once.

co-sign, or whatever 🙄

[dk-thrive]

Life sings and blazes. Even when we are numb to it, when we hide from it, when it is too loud and painful to experience, when we aren’t equipped to feel it – it is there, waiting, to be cherished and protected, ready to give us at least one more blast of beauty before the night.

— Matt Haig, The Life Impossible (Viking, September 3, 2024)

[vickster51]

Most Anticipated Films of 2025

Time to look ahead! Here are my most anticipated films of 2025!

Having completed my look back at 2024, it’s time to look ahead to what 2025 has in store and I’m starting with a look at the films I’m most looking forward to / most curious about this year. There are bound to be plenty more not on my radar as yet, but even taking that into account, it does feel like 2025 is a year with more franchises releasing their next instalments than we had in 2024, some…

[sysig]

This guy

[slamrink]

klay 0 points but he looked sexygorgeous doing it + lockdown defense + mavs WIN and dubs clinch so im leaving here with something 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

[youngchronicpain]

finding the balance between taking enough meds to help my pain but not too much to where I'll be unable to focus is so frustrating

I just want to work

I just want to focus

I just want my pain to not negatively affect so many things in my life