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syzthefrizz · 6 months ago

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Tips for writing dream sequences (from someone who has really vivid, weird dreams on a frequent basis)

My biggest pet peeve with fictional dream sequences is that they make too much sense!! They're too relevant! There's not enough random crazy stuff! That's not always unrealistic per se, but you are missing out on some of the fun ways you can reveal information about your character's mindset, fears, struggles, and future.

Most of my dreams have a goal or objective driving the plot, and it's usually urgent. Ex. "escape the huge storm on the horizon", "find a place to sleep for the night in an unfamiliar town", "find a bathroom". This is especially true of stress dreams.

Everything going on in the dream makes perfect sense to you during the dream. It doesn't feel like reality per se, but you think it is. You're living in a house full of vampires that could eat you at any moment? Seems legit.

Emotions and situations from the dreamer's life can/will find their way into dreams, with varying levels of subtlety. The dream could be about the stressful event itself, or it could be some sort of exaggerated metaphor. Ex. I was worried about whether I was a competent CS major while I was still trying to find a summer job/internship, and I was worried about what my professors must think of me. Such a good student on paper, still without summer plans. I dreamed that I ran into my professors all having lunch together at a restaurant (during a dream with a completely different storyline), and I was wearing my pajamas. They judged me.

Certain things are very hard to do in dreams. This could vary from person to person. For me, it's always driving (the brakes never work right), flying (I can't stay off the ground for very long), and running (it's like trying to run through waist-deep water).

People with PTSD may dream about the traumatic event happening differently than it actually happened. (Take this one with a grain of salt - I don't suffer from PTSD, I just research it sometimes so my blorbos can suffer accurately).

You can have a string of loosely connected or disconnected dream sequences back to back, each with an entirely different plot, setting, etc.

People can have reoccurring themes or plotlines in their dreams, which are often connected to their lives/psyche somehow. I frequently dream about running away from tornadoes and being in situations where there's some catastrophe coming but I'm the only one who understands that there's a problem and nobody will listen to me.

It's common for me to have a dream setting that I KNOW is someplace I'm familiar with, but it doesn't actually look like that place at all. Ex. "I dreamed that we were at my house, but it didn't look like my house..."

Dreams can end in cliffhangers. Sometimes I wake up right before I'm about to eat something delicious.

Sometimes people have dreams about doing things that they would never, ever do in real life, and they wake up feeling disgusted. This is Not a manifestation of their secret desires (*glares at Freud*).

Images are the most memorable parts of dreams. I forget the specific plot points, but I can still picture dozens of liminal spaces my brain has created, even years after I dreamed about it.

Dreams will fade from memory very quickly unless the dream had a strong impression on you, you write details about it down or you tell someone about it before you forget.

If you realize you're dreaming during your dream, sometimes you can control the dream going forward. This is called lucid dreaming. I've done it accidentally a couple times, and it's really hard to "hold on" to the dream and control it. I usually wake up soon after starting. With practice, you can get better at it.

Sometimes a normal/good dream can turn into a nightmare, and vice versa. Most of my dreams aren't really good or bad, they're something in between.

Your subconscious brain is CRAZY intuitive. We can argue over the existence of prophetic dreams (I've heard so many crazy stories), but at the end of the day, your subconscious brain knows things that you don't consciously know. If your character is in love with someone, their subconscious brain will know even if the character doesn't. Relationship problems? Deepest darkest fears and insecurities? Your brain knows. A dream predicted the downfall of my first relationship eight months before it happened, down to the reason why we failed. You can absolutely foreshadow this way. A character might subconsciously know what the consequences of their or other people's actions will be, understand things about the situation they're in, know things about the people they're interacting with, and more, despite their conscious realizations.

There are plenty of ways to make a dream sequence relevant to your story, but don't forget to add in some fun, random details. Character A is secretly in love with Character B? Have Character A dream about Character B confessing feelings to them while in a Vine Nostalgia themed restaurant over a plate of mac-n-cheese. The details are the fun part, and you can get as weird as you want. I once ran into my aunt in a dream, and she was wearing a backpack with a bunch of (fake?) hands sticking out of it, making a fan that rose above her back behind her head like some sort of peacock feather costume piece. I was so freaked out that I woke up. I dare you to get weirder than that.

Not everyone's brain works the same way. I have vivid, random, detailed, memorable dreams on a frequent basis. When I describe them to people they often ask "what were you on?". My roommate only remembers her dreams when they're nightmares. I have some friends who say they don't dream. Other friends have really boring, mundane dreams about their normal lives. Some people have weird dreams but only once in a blue moon. It's a good idea to decide off the bat what kinds of dreams your character has, and how often they remember them.

That's it for now, but I might make a part two if I think of more things to add. Feel free to reblog with your own personal dream expertise!

#writeblr #writing advice #creative writing #dreams #weird dreams #writing tips #writers on tumblr

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befuddledcinnamonroll · 11 months ago

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Top 10 Things I Love About the QL Tumblr Community 2023

I'm loving everyone's end of year lists, and decided to make up one of my own.

I haven't been on Tumblr for very long and was originally just lurking. 2023 marks the year where I finally started posting, after I read a take that made me feel compelled to come to a fictional character's defense. (Saengtai, my poor little blorbo).

So in commemoration of my first proper year of active tumblring, I present what I love about this community (in no particular order).

(Side note - Technically I know this is still primarily a BL community, but I like to say QL because I am trying to manifest more lesbians for us.)

1) The Gifmakers

Y'all are a good 70% of the reason I joined Tumblr in the first place. There are so many show moments that I want to relive, but without having to search through videos. Sometimes I want to appreciate the aesthetics. Sometimes I want to remember adorable or goofy moments. Sometimes I just want to see cute boys eating each other's faces. Our gifmakers give all of that to us, with the addition of so much creativity and style.

There's too many amazing ones to mention everyone, but I have to shout out @sparklyeyedhimbo, because the way your brain works makes me so happy.

2) The expertise

The other part of why I joined Tumblr was to learn more about what BLs were out there and what I might be missing. And holy hell. Y'all are putting in the work. Not only lists and resources for finding all kinds of QLs, like these fabulous monthly breakdowns by @gunsatthaphan, but also amazing posts that add additional context, like @absolutebl's incredibly helpful breakdown of Asian honorifics. There is so much research people do, for fun! And then they share it!

3) The meta analysis

I frickin love reading people's takes and analyses on series. I love learning, I love seeing perspectives from people with different cultural backgrounds to my own, it's all so fascinating! There's so much context we can miss due to our own privileges, or lack of knowing about various cultures, or due to whatever bubbles we've been living in. People here are just so smart, and nuanced, and willing to reflect and think about things, and also push back at each other, but generally with respect (except when you call out the dumb shit you see, usually on Twitter or TikTok, where people are being reductive and dumb about gender and sexuality).

And I've seen a few takes where people complain about analyses, and say that the director/production doesn't do everything deliberately, and we're all reading too much into it. To which I say, eh, lighten up. How people connect to and relate to media has relevance beyond what was intended. The point is we get to think and discuss and learn and grow. That doesn't happen if we don't analyze.

Special shout out here to @respectthepetty because colors mean things!

4) The wild theories

The other side of the analysis coin, the clown cars y'all drive around in with the wildest of theories. I have happily climbed into an occasional clown car, and usually I am utterly wrong (*cough* Saifah *cough*). But it's a super fun ride. I love seeing how people's brains work. I love it when y'all are wrong. I love it when y'all are right. It's beautiful.

5) Immediate acceptance

I am one of those people who knows that I have a lot of good qualities, and also, always kind of expect rejection. Blame the childhood bullies, I guess. Anyway, whenever I delve into a new space, I still feel like a total dork that no one will want to talk to. It's kind of a fraught way to move through the world, but I manage.

Anyway, I started posting my thoughts as they came up, and people are just totally cool with it. People even follow me sometimes. Even my silliest thoughts and dumbest jokes get at least a couple likes. It's so validating.

And my very silly joke about gay mafia in Kiseki has over 800 likes. I feel very seen.

6) Mutuals

I still kind of can't believe I have any. This ties in to the dork feeling above, but seriously - they are soooo cooooool. They're smart and awesome and funny, and they somehow find me worth following back, which is baffling yet wonderful. I want to squish their faces and give them many kisses (if they're into that kind of thing).

7) The self-exploration

I really appreciate how it's become more talked about how a lot of people are discovering queerness through BL, because that is so the case for me. I think it's both that I was in a bit of a hetero bubble before, and also that I'm evolving a bit as I age. I had figured out I was demi, and maybe a little bit gay, before getting in to BL, but being in this community, and seeing so many of you share so openly and freely, has made me realize it might be more than a little bit.

Either it was a new realization, or being around y'all has made me more gay. Win win, either way.

8) The weirdness

I'm weird. Y'all are weird. I love it.

9) The thirst

So many in this community are thirsty as fuck, and as someone who is in that same condition, I love that it's not just me. There are not many places where I can freely admit how horny I am as a part of my general existence.

Here? I could post about wanting to lick some random BL actor's face, and it would get a bunch of likes and some tags like #lickable, and it's just not remotely a big deal.

Also the gifmakers understand this, and give us beautiful cuts of our spicy scenes. They are genuinely too good for us.

10) The communal watching experience

There is absolutely nothing like watching along with people in the community. It is so worth the torture of having to wait week to week for new episodes. Seeing the show trend, watching the theories fly fast and furious, or the way everyone collectively loses their minds over particular moments. In a world that can feel very isolating, it's a very warm experience.

So there you go. Thank you all for being you. Here's to another year of QL shenanigans and losing our collective minds!

#bl community #ql community #bl series #ql series #thai bl

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kerubimcrepin · 10 months ago

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Episode 11: The Hairy Arachelmet

First of all, Kerubim's cup is in a dangerous ass place. If he spills it, he will have burns.

Truly, if Ecaflip wasn't on his side, he would be long dead.

Second of all, love that he begins looking at Simone when she's on The Ladder That Looks Like It Will Fucking Kill You.

When I first noticed this moment, I assumed it was Kerubim y'know. Ogling her. But now, considering this is the only time in the whole scene he's looking at her, I think he's looking at her because she's on The Ladder That Looks Like It Will Fucking Kill You, and if she began to fall things would be bad.

Btw, the only pictures Keke has in his home, anywhere where it's visible, are of himself, Lou, or some random scenery.

There HAS to be something psychological going on here, considering he is a father and canonically, uh, really normal about it.

Like. Whatever the reason for having Joris call him grampycat is, is the same for not putting up any cute pictures of Joris.

Something-something, his canonical guilt about killing ("""killing""") Julith, perhaps? Perhaps, feeling a bit too old for fatherhood? Maybe both?

On one hand, YESSS RARE SIMONE FAILGIRL MOMENT + i love it when people who are supposed to be good at something are bad at it.

On the other hand... Kerubim, your upbringing single-handedly changed the course of Joris's life so much, that, as an adult huppermage man, he uses a "magic wand" (log) to bash in people's skulls.

Kerubim yells at him to stop, and he just immediately stops and salutes.

It's never explained why Joris does this all the fucking time in the series, (besides the fact that he has ADHD. (To me. In my brain. I decided that he has it.)) but I think Kerubim did some Pikmin-style parenting shit on him.

Except instead of Pikmin it was probably something like "let's pretend I am a commanding officer and you are a member of the Bontarian army."

Okay, so, this is a whole can of worms we'll get in now.

This text is the famous Lorem Ipsum placeholder. The first two words are exactly Lorem Ipsum. Yet, I am mentally ill enough to sit down and translate this all.

So, uh. Yeah. I translated it by hand. It was painful.

The interesting parts are: the first page is the usual Lorem Ipsum placeholder with random edits, spaces, and changes. The second page is the original Lorem Ipsum from Cicero's De finibus bonorum et malorum.

I may be wrong with some of the spaces, because of the way the letters that look like " : :: . " and their weird sizes.

But also... Who give a shit?

Obligatory food moment: he is eating grapes and bird legs. Maybe tofu, or maybe other bird that size.

He is so fucking stupid.

My friend @dullard had pointed out that the way Kerubim's system works is probably by assigning a number to a direction.

I am not good with numbers OR directions, so I hope he makes a post about this. Or sends me an ask.

All I can point out, in regard to this, is the often neglected connection of Ecaflips to scrying and predicting the future and destiny.

So yeah. For all intents and purposes, Kerubim, with his level of luck, maaaay be a bit of an, uh. Oracle.

Though, I think he'd be scandalized by this idea I'm proposing here.

I suppose this episode's story takes place after the story in the episode 38, Dragokart Race, where Kerubim becomes a second place Dragokart champion.

Is this in any way relevant? No. Welcome to my blog, where I talk about literally the most useless Dofus facts. Anyway.

Adding to the list of Implied Adventures We Never See:

Literally everything to do with Atcham.

Kerubim working with Arachnees some more.

To be added.

Culture note: being a hypermage is associated with being smart and being able to predict how situations are going to go.

This blog may seem like it's pointing out the most obvious shit, but keep in mind, besides me wanting to gush about this show and write analysis pieces, this blog is also meant as a bit of a resource for Random Irrelevant Lore. For fic writers.

I may be the fic writers.

...It's interesting to think about how these cultural standards may affect Joris, who, in all honesty, is fucking stupid. There are pebbles where his brain should be.

Anyway.

He really is stupid.

For how cheerful this show is, this moment is a very stark reminder of the fact that Kerubim was fighting and killing people.

I think that the way he was describing this to Joris probably was something like "and then I sliced that guy in half". Which is both... very violent, and also not very detailed.

Your daily reminder that while searching for Ecaflip City, to get rich and be able to propose to Lou, he tried to fuck a pandawa girl, and DEFINITELY fucked these three. Sad! (Edit: that, or he was searching for it long before the proposal thing.)

Better late than never, Keke. Better late than never.

But it would have been cool if you knew that when you were [SPRAYS HIM WITH A WATER BOTTLE] an orphan, as described in the official text The Wheel of Destiny #8: Kerubim Crepin.

This is my legally required once-in-a-few-liveblogs Wheel of Destiny lore mention. You're welcome.

Joris looks like he heard what just happened, and like.... I know that this is just a funny animation moment.

but i want to belive so so badly, that, due to dragon possession, joris can hear whatever the fuck is going on with this hat, by intercepting its ~~psionic waves~~

that he just heard a spider call his father a motherfucker.

Is it not a wonderful vision of the world, that I just described here?

#ep11 #wakfu #dofus #krosmoz #ro liveblogs dofus

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purplefangirl42 · 2 years ago

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For your requests, some Silco fluff please? Of him comforting/encouraging reader who's nervous about a big event that they're about to do?

No this isn't vaguely autobiographical or relevant to myself idk what you're talking about

Thanks for the request Coi! I hope your thing goes well this weekend and you have lots of fun! 💜

This is a continuation of this request.

Tags: Fluff, supportive Silco, Reader is an anxious bean

What if I bring the wrong paintings? Will people like my simpler works? What if it rains?

These were only a few of the questions bouncing around your brain as you bustled about your studio. You were gathering the things you would need the next day for the exhibition you had been invited to, and your mind was running a mile a minute. You had never been invited to an event like this and you were totally unprepared.

On one of your passes across the room, you nearly ran over your husband as he entered your studio. He was able to step out of the way in time, but you dropped the case you were carrying, spilling the clips for your painting frames all over the floor.

“Darling?” Silco asked as you scrambled to pick up the scattered clips. “Is everything alright?”

“Yep, everything’s fine!” you said, out of breath. “I’m just busy, that's all.”

You righted yourself and continued your trek across the room. You placed the box down amongst the mountain of other things you were bringing with you. Standing back from the pile, you ran through your mental checklist for the hundredth time in the past hour.

“Is there anything I can help you with?” Silco asked, coming to stand beside you.

You could use at least three other people’s help, but you wanted to make sure that everything was done how you envisioned it in your mind, which meant that you had to do it yourself. His offer was a kind one and you appreciated his attempt to be helpful, but this was something you needed to do, if for your own mental state if nothing else.

“I think I’ve got it, but thank you, love.”

You felt Silco’s hand touch yours lightly and you turned to look at him. He was giving you a look that was bordering on concern, but like he was trying to keep his opinion to himself. You gave him what you hoped was a reassuring smile and grasped his hand.

“I mean it, Silco. I’m just a bit stressed at the moment.”

Silco pulled on your hand and started to lead you in the direction of the door.

“Why don’t you take a short break?” he said. “Come have some lunch with Jinx and I? You’ve been up here all morning, and it’s time you had a breather.”

You opened your mouth to protest, but the look he gave you told you it was not truly a suggestion, even if he had phrased it that way. Your mouth fell shut and you let yourself be pulled away from your work.

Jinx was already waiting in Silco’s office when you arrived, devouring the food before her. She paused in her eating to look up when you entered. She gave you a small wave and wiped her hand across her mouth.

“Dad wasn’t sure if you would actually come down,” she said.

“He didn’t really give me a choice,” you said, looking at your husband with an amused glance.

Silco released your hand and placed his hands on your shoulders to push you down into the seat beside your daughter. Jinx pushed a plate full of food in your direction and you took what you wanted from it before settling in to eat. Silco sat in his chair on the other side of the desk and slowly picked at his own food.

As you ate, you could feel his gaze on you, as if he was watching you to make sure that you were actually eating. You looked up to meet his gaze with a raised eyebrow, which Silco mirrored by raising his own. You laughed and shook your head at him, returning to your meal. Once Jinx had finished her food, she ran off to her own space, leaving you alone with Silco. When you tried to get up to do the same, Silco’s voice stopped you.

“Stay,” he said in a tone that did not leave room for questioning. “Your break isn’t over yet.”

You gave him a confused look and gestured in the general direction of your studio.

“Silco, I have things that I need to do to get ready for tomorrow.”

“I know. But I want you to stay for a few more minutes at least.”

You stood from your chair and walked around to the other side of the desk, stopping when you reached him. He once again took your hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

“I know this is a very exciting thing for you and I am happy that you have this opportunity,” Silco said. “But, I’m worried about the amount of stress this is putting on you.”

“I’m fine!” you said, hoping your tone was convincing.

Judging by the look on Silco’s face, you had a feeling it wasn’t as convincing as you hoped. You sank down onto the armrest of his chair and he released your hand in favor of wrapping his arm around your waist.

“Everything will go smoothly tomorrow,” he said. “I will be there, Jinx will be there, Sevika will be there. You have meticulously planned out everything that you will be taking with you and we are all prepared to help you make sure it is done correctly.”

“I know,” you said, leaning against him. “It’s just…I’ve never done something like this before and I have a million things that could go wrong running through my head.”

You heard a soft chuckle from beside you and Silco tightened his arm around you.

“As much as I appreciate your need to think things through and prepare for every possible outcome, I don’t think it’s necessary in this case.”

“But what if…” you started.

“Anything that happens, we will deal with it. Together.”

You smiled softly and turned your head to place a gentle kiss on Silco’s temple.

“You know I appreciate you, right?”

“Yes, darling. I know.”

Silco released his hold on you and waved his hand to dismiss you from your forced pause in activity.

“Go back to your obsessive preparation, but please try to think about what I said.”

“If I’m not done in 2 hours, come get me,” you said.

“ONE hour.”

“One and a half?” you offered.

Silco sighed and nodded in resignation.

“Very well.”

You leaned down to give him another quick kiss before scurrying out of his office back to your studio. Once you entered the room, you could see everything in a new light. You had everything you could possibly need ready to go. You just needed to package up the paintings you were taking with you. Maybe you could finish that in less than the timeframe he had given you.

Everything is fine. Tomorrow is going to be great.

#silco #lol silco #silco arcane #silco x reader #arcane #arcane league of legends

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cupidsdescendant · 2 years ago

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Mercs X Sweet Tooth G/N!

Hey yall! It’s been a while since I wrote a short head canon list for the mercs and so I decided to write this! I really have been getting into writing actual one shot stories instead of lists so that’s why my posts have been so slow ^___^ I’m thinking about making a version of this one for the creepy pasta characters to go back to fanfic roots ;-; anyways, g’day! Mwah XOXOXO

Scout:

-Very happy

-“Oh yeah? What’s your favorite one? Really! Mine too!” He takes out your favorite candy in response

-You both like staying up at 3 am eating random sweets

-The sugar rush hits both of you SOOOOO hard. Running across the fort, double, fuck it, triple jumping all around and screaming violently.

- You both literally laugh at almost every thing the mercs say even if it’s not funny or relevant and both laugh at each other laughing so hard. Your laughs become even wheezier when you both cannot speak and it’s both of you mumbling and laughing and your mumbling.

-Just as much as the rush gets you the crash hits harder than the market crash of 2008. Both of you are literally so tired you guys can’t even get up. Eyes sore, legs weak, body tired, everything hurts after literally sonic speeding everywhere. You both wake up holding each other or spooning <3.

-Instead of a hot steamy cup of coffee in the morning you wake Scout up by sitting on top of him and feeding him lemon heads and sour gummy bears.

-You like to throw gummies and candies into his mouth during fights just to play around and it helps with a speed boost

-Although Scout loves candy his favorite is of course: B o n k

-And you both drink it religiously! At this point you both have it in an IV put up into your veins.

-Scout and you have so much fun with candy. You both go to candy stores together and have fun picking out candies and sodas. Once you both get home you guys would eat eat eat, lose your mind and sleep for the rest of the night ^___^

Soldier:

-He doesn’t eat a lot of sweets, but once you give him one he goes a little crazy

-Once, you gave him a chocolate bar and he rocket jumped to space and didn’t come back for at least 3 days

-Soldier finds you alone eating a 12 pack of mini cupcakes to yourself and he gasps “Dear god!”

-“mfwhaht-?” Y/N said mouth full of white cake and frosting. CANNIBALISM!!” He screams pointing at you in horror

-“HoW!?” Y/N yelled out, Soldier ran over and ran his hand on Y/N’s chin “My cupcake is eatin’ a cupcake!”

-He loves a good ol' fashion American Cherry pie

-Coke is his favorite drink

-He mostly enjoys milk chocolate and whoppers

-Always makes sure they're made in America

Pyro:

-you know em, Pyro is a maniac for that typa shit. Way even more than Scout

-Give them a jolly rancher and he'll spend half of the time rolling around in circles laughing and banging his head on the wall

-her brain is already filled with sunshine and rainbows but once you add candy- it's full blown candy land

-they like to make you dance a lot when he's hyper on candy! Always spinning you around and around <3

-He likes hoping around too. He acts kinda like a little bunny ;w;

-Pyro and you basically just run around setting everything on fire without a care in the world

-His favorite candy...? All of em! Lollipops and sour-sweet ones are his favorites.

-They propose to you with a ring pop

Demoman:

-he can handle some sweet things but he's not a big fan

-But when you mix a sugar rushed Y/N with a drunk Demo it's alllllllll chaos.

-You both love doing karaoke when you're out of yall's minds, screaming violently to songs or crying to sad ones

-Probably have a super duper upper crazye rap battle too

-When you both crash you find each other on the other sides of the rooms but when you both wake up you go and cuddle.

-You both try and get sober from your addictions but fail and the next weekend is the same lol

-Like I said, Demo doesn't really like candy. The only ones he'd eat is going to be mixed with alcohol or root beer ones

Heavy:

no comment. these are his favorite

Engineer:

-being from the south, he loves moon pies and other pies in general

-Engi loves maple taffy and whenever it's winter time he makes them with the mercs or just enjoys them by himself

-He loooves taffy and Rocky Road!!

-Pie is also his favorite, Pumpkin pie specifically. He always likes to eat it with a scoop of vanilla ice cream

-All of the sweet things he eats are always warm and relaxing and so you both like to cozy up together and eat together

-Engineer always has to hold you down when you get a little hyper and he has to tell you to relax

-Gets overwhelmed trying to calm you down and eventually gives up but you decided to sit next to him when you can't find him

Medic:

-always warns you about cavities and tells you not to eat so much sweets

-He usually hides the fact that he eats soo much candy.

-Considering Medic is German he eats mostly German candy and chocolates but he's afraid to admit he likes American candies a lot

-He likes to eat sour candies but his taste in things is a lot more "luxury" and so he eats mostly dark chocolate

-Def the kind of guy to say he's not eating chocolate or candy and have stains all over his clothes and mouth

-Medic's manic-ness and your hyper-ness when you're on a sugar rush is. terrifying. Both of you don't stop and you both cannot.

-Both of you go on the most crazy adventures. Once you both woke up with your limbs detached and the other time you guy's switched bodies

Sniper:

-Sniper doesn't eat sweets. periodt.

-He usually just watches you go coo coo through his rifle and chuckles to himself

-even though he doesn't eat anything sweet he think it's so cute that you love sweets so much

-He goes out his way to always buy you candy when he has the time and his favorite part is holding it while you chomp into it

-Once he saw you eating oreos and he called you cookie monster and you didn't know how to feel

-He's very neutral with everything tbh..

-You always try to convince him to eat it but he just can't do it

-So he'll eat something savory while you eat something sweet so he can interact and hang out with you

Spy:

-He loves chocolate croissants...okay sorry for the french joke lmao

-seriously though he's french! France has the most bomb fucking sweets and desserts ever

-He loves Macarons, Éclairs, Profiterole and crepes

-He also really loves to tell you the history of those desserts and loves sharing his culture with you!!! <3

-He tries to calm you down whenever you have a sugar rush and usually forces you to sit down and eat desserts while he reads to you

-Loves to wipe off the cream or frosting off your face and say some horny french bullshit

-You alwaysssss beg Spy to make French pastries and he reluctantly agrees

-You both spend hours in the kitchen making food together and flirting. It's a really cute moment.

-During breaks or lunch you both eat your pastries together <333

okay so it's been a while since I posted. Hey yall! Hope you like this one <3 stay cute! Mwah xoxoxo

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halofcrged · 7 months ago

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RULES.

going to try and keep this pretty simple & straightforward.

I. You must be 18+ to interact with me. I am 42 years old.

There will be not safe for work content on this blog of the sexual and potentially of the graphic violence nature. I do tag everything that might be triggering and am happy to tag whatever you ask me to so long as I remember!

I ask that you tag any visuals containing spiders with spider tw* spiders tw* arachnophobia tw* etc etc and yes, I know it’s a weird one but anything about the taste of soap or eating soap is a trigger so just tag it with soap tw* or penny don’t look* as I have that blacklisted too. I don’t have any triggering fcs or what not.

II. This blog is multi-ship, multi-verse, crossover & au friendly.

Every ship is in its’ own verse unless previously discussed with all parties. Every thread or set of threads takes place in its own universe unless previously discussed with all parties.

III. I write anything from one-liners to novellas, it really just depends on life, my headspace, how much sleep I’ve been getting, how much else I have going on in real life, etc.

IV. My activity is NOT consistent. I am infamous for blog hopping. I have literally replied to some starters / replies two years+ after they were originally written. I am not fast. If I am fast, it’s by some small miracle and perfect storm of brain, muse and free time. It will not last.

V. I have kids, cats and dogs; I am in college, I have a household to take care of and I have many physical and mental handicaps that can affect my ability to function and write, including but not limited to rheumatoid arthritis, osteoarthritis, spinal stenosis, ganglion cysts, torn meniscus, migraines, hypothyroidism, PMDD, nerve damage, herniated disc, ADHD, depression, anxiety, C-PTSD and severe insomnia.

Roleplay is something I do for fun.

If it isn’t fun, I don’t do it.

If it’s stressing me out, I’ll avoid it.

VI. I do graphic commissions.

I run @tuppencetrinkets where I post the millions of screencaps and 200x100 icons that I make. The resources are free but donations are always appreciated as I pay about $40 in hosting / program fees a month. My commissions are always pay what you can. I hate setting prices because I want everyone to have pretties if they want them and I don’t know what anyone can afford at any given time. I do everything from base icons to edited icons, backgrounds, headers, dividers, promos, videos, you name it. I try to be quick with turnaround but again – sometimes I just can’t be.

VII. I am fine with plotting things out in advance or winging it. I really don’t care, whatever you are more comfortable with is fine with me.

I like all kinds of plots. I like fluffy things, slice of life, broships, frenemies, enemies, familial, found family, long arcing, one shot throwaway, dark and twisted, you name it plots. I will not write n*ncon or anything nsfw themed /even hinted at with minor characters and I won’t write any explicit child death etc. but most everything else is fair game.

VIII. You can throw a million memes at me any time you want to.

IX. You can throw any and all starters at me any time you want to.

I’m not necessarily mutual exclusive but I don’t guarantee I’ll respond to memes or starters from non-mutual blogs.

X. I use icons, headers, promos etc. that I make myself 99% of the time. Please do not use any of my edited graphics. All base icons I use are free and available on my resource blog.

XI. I use small text and my icons are 200x100 with empty space to make them 540x130 so that they don’t stretch out on mobile. I prefer not heavily edited replies in terms of font variance and colors but really don’t care that much.

XII. I’ve probably forgotten relevant things but, who knows.

XIII. No drama. Period. I’m not interested.

XIV. I’m here for fun. I’m really pretty easy going. If you have any questions feel free to toss them into my inbox!

#RULES.

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bugdotpng · 2 years ago

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it look me nearly 30 years but i’ve finally started doing things that make my life easier. incrementally, of course. i didn’t start doing all of this overnight. anyway, here’s some stuff i’ve learned:

i buy pre-washed/pre-cut fruits and veggies when i can so i’m more inclined to actually eat them (vs. having to wash/cut them beforehand)

also: frozen and canned fruits/veggies are good. if they fit with your lifestyle and get you to eat things that are good for you, do it

actually using the reminders app because i made it even easier for myself by adding a widget on my home screen (general rule: if you have a mental block to doing something, see if you can remove steps)

i keep notepads and sticky notes in every room in my house so i can write down things (usually groceries i need) as i remember them

i keep a bunch of plastic bags at the bottom of my bathroom and desk trash cans so i can replace them easily

i keep cleaning supplies in multiple, relevant places in my house so i’m more inclined to use them (i.e. carpet cleaner in my bedroom; sanitizer in my bathroom, etc.)

i place a bunch of small trash cans around my house where i tend to make more trash (laundry, desk, etc.) and i line them with grocery bags so i can take them out quickly when it’s trash day

my biggest organization tip (that doesn’t sound all that impressive, really) is making sure everything has a designated space. i use a lot of clear containers so i can see what’s inside and so everything has its own space, even in drawers or shelves

noise-canceling headphones are a godsend. doing laundry and dishes are excruciating and exhausting because they’re both too damn loud. i started wearing noise-cancelling headphones and i have so much energy afterward and i don’t lament the idea of having to put away my silverware lol also if i’m overstimulated from a long day of work, sometimes it’s nice to just not hear anything :^) it blew my mind how much shit my stupid brain was processing without me realizing

i have meds that are more effective if i take them at the same time every day so i set a repeating alarm to take them. that wasn’t always working so i started putting my meds in a daily pill organizer. i take them every day now because i don’t have to remove them from their various containers every time lol. every sunday i make a note to refill them for the week! and the individual days pop out so i can just grab the days i need if i’m spending a weekend away

i’ve tried to recognize where i’m imposing bizarre arbitrary rules that make my life harder. ex: for some reason i convinced myself i’m only allowed to do laundry on weekends and i’m not allowed to run small loads. that’s simply not true lol

in that vein: there is no rule that says you’re not allowed to sit down while cooking. my knees are much happier when i take a chair into the kitchen with me.

sometimes i get so depressed i struggle with hygiene. when i’m not feeling so shitty i try to stock up on things that’ll help me feel better during that time like dry shampoo, oil blotters and baby wipes.

i keep a little hygiene bag with my medical/emergency bag. it has hand lotion, chapstick, nail clippers, a small hairbrush and other things i might need to make myself more comfortable while i’m out and about (think: hangnails, chapped lips, dry skin, etc.)

i’ve struggled for a very long time with flossing because it’s awkward and difficult and sometimes painful. at the guidance of my dentist, i bought some individual flossers. still didn’t use them. wanna know why? the stupid plastic packaging was too loud. i took them all out and put them in a little glass jar so i can grab one super easy. sometimes i’ll even sit on the floor while i floss to give my knees a break.

there are literally no rules. do what you can to make things easier. there’s no one watching you, judging your every move and calling you lazy. and if anyone does call you lazy for trying to make things easier or even more comfortable, they’re not worth listening to. anyway i hope my ramble list helps at least one person lol

#at the very least it’s a fascinating look into the progress i’ve made in therapy lol

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high-theyre-frendough · 2 years ago

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ABOUT THE BLOG

For a while, I was posting random high thoughts on my main account, but decided, why not make a dedicated page for that kind of content. So, this is my 🍃 account. I will never post or respond here if I am sober or think I am too sober. That way, it is authentic.

MY NAME

If you don’t follow me, call me the avocado bandit. if you do follow me, you must call me the avocado king. becoming a follower makes me your king.

ABOUT ME

I am an adult and I consume weed to help with my C-PTSD & depression. Also for silly time because silly brain is fun. I am a trans guy and I use He/It/Xe pronouns. I would prefer it if minors did not interact here, but I suppose I cannot be too mad if someone comes across a funny out-of-context post. This is under the assumption that I can be funny. I will try to avoid posting here while not high. This includes writing this pinned post.

We have DID and sometimes post about it. However, that is not what this blog is focused around.

DNI

If you are transphobic/TERF/trans-med or otherwise an obnoxious cisgender person (fuck it, especially the CISHETS) then you can go bye-bye.

If think you can be a system without childhood trauma, also bye bye. This account is not the place for this drama, but trust me I have a nuanced opinion on the topic. But I don't wanna deal with it on this account.

If you homophobic, good bye bitch. Also if you exclude asexuals or non-binary people, then fuck off. Go eat a used gym sock.

If you are racist or xenophobic, I hope that your teeth rot out of your mouth, leaving you to only eating bland soup, as you are no longer allowed to enjoy foods from other cultures.

If you are trans-id I would appreciated if you identified as blocked.

If you are pro ana or sh it would be cool if you got help instead of glorifying it online.

If you are a pedo, it would be pretty fucking cool if you got on a boat to the center of the ocean, tied cinder blocks to your feet, and entered the water.

TAG GUIDE

Different types of posts will use the following tags for the following things. If you follow, feel free to block whichever ones you like. Don’t expect everyone to like everything, so here it is for your convenience.

#♻️ gilded profoundness -> These are posts which are meant to be meaningful, even though they probably are not.

#♻️ descriptions -> directly describe the experience of bring high

#♻️ weird -> weird things said while high that are probably stupid on purpose

#♻️ capitalism -> sometimes when i'm high i am thinking about capitalism too hard and confuse myself. should i put "we"??? we are a system but will not talk about it on this account much, so idk if it is relevant? should i add things to confuse? never mind

#♻️ realizations -> things i did not think about before

#♻️ realizations but traumatic -> tmw you have a ptsd flashback while high and then recover and you are still high and also kinda dissociating and you sit there and you think about what you just now realize was trauma cause you thought it was normal but no, it fucking was not, but you're high so you just write it down somewhere so you remember it, then you go back to thinking about silly high things, or consume strange media cause you're high and that's fun to do while high.

#♻️🍆 spicy -> horny posts. probably won't post much of that here as we have a separate blog for horny thoughts, but if it is here it'll be tagged

#♻️ reblog -> posts i reblogged

#♻️ memes -> usually have to do with venting but not always

#♻️ real time -> describing things as they are happening or just happened.

#♻️ free space -> Concepts to write about for entertainment.

#♻️ ask response -> if someone said something that would be nice but do not be mean please

#♻️ agere -> sometimes baby brain takes over. soft fuzzy high brain easily becomes little baby. sfw!!!! (note that this blog is not 100% sfw, though when i do regress, it is in a sfw way)

#♻️ paranoid -> will also be tagged with common tags just in case for filtering. i just realized that if someone follows, and the block some of these tags, this pinned post will be hidden cause i have those tags pinned for convenience

#♻️ neutral -> idk a specific label

#♻️ walmartposting - Its a place for stoners to exercise aimlessly.

#♻️ upset -> vent or something idk

#♻️ dissociative stuff -> stuff about DID. usually syscourse. figured i might as well make a tag for it since we get riled up while high on occasion.

#♻️ yeee 🍺 -> alcohol was involved

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fallsfcrged · 10 months ago

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going to try and keep this pretty simple & straightforward.

I. You must be 18+ to interact with me. 21+ is preferred.

II. This blog is multi-ship, multi-verse, crossover & au friendly.

Every ship is in its’ own verse unless previously discussed with all parties. Every thread or set of threads takes place in its own universe unless previously discussed with all parties.

III. I write anything from one-liners to novellas, it really just depends on life, my headspace, how much sleep I’ve been getting, how much else I have going on in real life, etc.

IV. My activity is NOT consistent. I am infamous for blog hopping. I have literally replied to some starters / replies years+ after they were originally written. I am not fast. If I am fast, it’s by some small miracle and perfect storm of brain, muse and free time. It will not last.

V. I’m 42. I have kids, cats, & dogs; I am in college, I have a household to take care of and I have many physical and mental handicaps that can affect my ability to function and write, including but not limited to rheumatoid arthritis, osteoarthritis, spinal stenosis, ganglion cysts, torn meniscus, migraines, hypothyroidism, PMDD, nerve damage, herniated disc, ADHD, depression, anxiety, C-PTSD and severe insomnia.

Roleplay is something I do for fun.

If it isn’t fun, I don’t do it.

If it’s stressing me out, I’ll avoid it.

VI. I do graphic commissions.

VII. I am fine with plotting things out in advance or winging it. I really don’t care, whatever you are more comfortable with is fine with me.

VIII. You can throw a million memes at me any time you want to.

IX. You can throw any and all starters at me any time you want to.

I’m not necessarily mutual exclusive but I don’t guarantee I’ll respond to memes or starters from non-mutual blogs.

X. I use icons, headers, promos etc. that I make myself 99% of the time. Please do not use any of my edited graphics. All base icons I use are free and available on my resource blog.

XII. I’ve probably forgotten relevant things but, who knows.

XIII. No drama. Period. I’m not interested.

XIV. I’m here for fun. I’m really pretty easy going. If you have any questions feel free to toss them into my inbox!

#RULES.

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poughkeepsies · 2 years ago

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Welcome back. This time it's even more delusional.

Featuring additions from beloved contributors and some Olympic-level reaches for episodes 15-18. But if this is the Olympics then god help me I will step onto that podium as the most insane clown in this depraved, abandoned circus.

Okay, first, from @captainragtag, a truly galaxy-brain interpretation of Buck's storyline in 612. I'll let them explain:

Second, @wewatchweewoo made the brilliant observation about 614 and Buck saying "nobody likes a cheater." That's such a rich line coming from Buck that clearly, there must be a reason he's feeling some type of way about it at that point specifically, and literally what else could be the cause of that other than the fact that Eddie is dating and he and Buck have an arrangement (currently operating on the fwb wavelength with knowledge of future episodes) and Buck is being pissy but he can't be more direct about it, so he has to vague Eddie in a way that no one else would suspect.

And the third and final brilliant addition is from @buck-coded. Again, I'll let them explain:

Moving on to 615, we are operating under the assumption that the secret relationship throughout s6 has been a poorly communicated friends-with-benefits arrangement. This is piggybacking off of the previous ideas about 614 but I'd like to add some further analysis about why, then, Eddie would be so quick to accept Pepa's interference.

They've been fwb for a long time at that point and while they have clearly both been very enthusiastic about the arrangement, it hasn't evolved or shown any sign of potentially becoming something more in the future (they are both cowards, please understand.) So while Eddie is very happy to keep being fwb with Buck, he is also feeling like his time is running out, because he can have only a part of him but never the full thing and Buck will eventually find someone to move on with. So, despite the arrangement, he does feel lonely and he thinks he should at least try to move on. Seeing this, Buck himself comes to the conclusion that his time with Eddie is running out and jumps back into the dating game (they always start dating at the same time do you think this is a coincidence???).

The 615 graveyard scene is where everything changes. Because Eddie had taken the first step, but he wasn't being that serious about it. He was just doing it as a precaution but that didn't mean he wanted to stop what he had with Buck if he didn't have to. But Buck had already taken Eddie's decision to start dating again as a complete rejection and thrown himself into dating head first, meeting Natalia and telling Eddie she sees him. And I am so sorry to do this to you in the middle of the delusional secret relationship buddie post but...we have entered the pining era. In my humble but true opinion, it is at this point that they kind of just both unspokenly agree to stop being fwb. Eddie's pining can be seen from space throughout the graveyard scene and 616 as he so yearningly examines Chimney's engagement ring then proceeds to shamelessly stare at Buck throughout the rest of the scene. It may not be directly relevant to the secret relationship aspect of the theory, but a loud moment to consider is the camera pan to Buck and Eddie sitting basically in each other's laps as Bobby talks about madney belonging together.

617 is essentially more of the same with them both trying to move on and being pathetic about it, but an interesting connection to consider is the absence is a presence aspect of the final date between Buck and Natalia. Buck cooking at home is something that has been solely associated with the Diazes throughout s6 and we see him trying to cook for Natalia in 617. However, she freaks out when Kameron, a clear symbol of Buck's relationship with fatherhood, shows up and leaves before eating any of the food he made for her. It's Kameron who ends up eating the food he made instead. Considering it's clear that Kameron and her child are no actual threat to Natalia, it's their roles as Buck's potential child and his other parental figure that are the threat, which can easily be substituted by Christopher and Eddie. Natalia came back because she realized she overreacted about Kameron and the baby, but how will she react when she realizes that those roles still exist in Buck's life, she was just looking at the wrong people?

618 leaves them in the same place but, as I've mentioned before in other posts, it is very telling that Eddie and Christopher end the season on the couch just as Buck decides to go looking for one.

Basically, season 6 does end with them broken up but there is all the evidence to reasonably assume Buck and Eddie have fucked before and shall, on some bright sunny day, fuck again.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

(ALT theory: they don't stop fucking, they just get Natalia and Marisol to agree to regular foursomes.)

Buddie Secret Relationship Conspiracy Manifesto

Hello. Welcome to possibly the most delusional buddie theory yet. This is a collaboration with @swiftiebuckleys, and as such I would like to cite our sources accordingly: dude, trust us.

Okay so I know a lot of people have talked about the theory of buddie possibly being in a secret relationship that is even a secret from the audience during season 6. For me, this started during 6A. It started because I was thinking about how 601 started with such a poignant and domestic Buckley-Diaz family scene that, as a part of a premier that was meant to establish where the characters are after four months of hiatus, told us Buck, Eddie and Christopher are living in each other's pockets as their own little family at the start of the season (I even wrote about this in this meta I posted while 6a was airing lmao).

But then for the rest of 6A there really wasn't any significant on-screen buddie or Buckley-Diaz moments, even though there was plenty that was implied at, including: Buck and Eddie planning to go to Marisol's house to help with repairs without the rest of the firefam, Buck and Chris hanging out so Chris potentially telling Buck the secret about skipping school even though he didn't tell Eddie, Buck and Eddie sitting in the back of the waiting room together separate from the rest of the firefam while they waited for news about Karen, and Eddie giving Hoover to Buck and convincing him to keep him even though his building doesn't allow dogs. What do all but one of these moments have in common? They're moments where Buck and Eddie were either alone or away from anyone who would know them from the rest of the gang and wouldn't feel the need to hide their relationship. When at work, Buck and Eddie had a reasonably normal amount of on-screen interactions, but it was only their moments happening outside of work that was pushed to the off-screen. (Bonus: one on-screen 6A moment that lives in my head rent-free and screams of secret relationship is that shot of them stepping into frame together and holding eye contact while the song lyrics in the bg go "I want your sex and your affection when I'm holding you close" in 609.)

However, while this^ is all well and good, it's 6B that really gives the secret relationship theory its wings.

Episode 10 gave us the lightning strike with a sequence that was shot almost entirely from the perspective of Eddie. While in the initial aftermath of the strike we see the shock on Hen, Chimney, and Bobby's faces, the scene is in slow-motion and muted until Eddie realizes what's going on and we watch every minute facial expression on his face as the horror dawns and he snaps into action. Eddie's reaction is what sparks everyone else's movement and then we see him completely forgo his own injuries and his own safety to save Buck. In the secret relationship trope, the near-death experience is a lot of the time what forces the couple to blow their cover and reveal their relationship. That didn't happen here as buddie were already close enough to warrant the strength of Eddie's reaction and Buck was unresponsive and there wasn't any time to lose. HOWEVER, episode 11 and the absence of a scene with Eddie alone at Buck's bedside can be explained by the fact that he couldn't be shone there or his bedside confessions would have given them away to the audience. As it is, other than Margaret and Maddie, Buck's mother and sister, he's the only one dressed in all black, his composure crumbling and unable to make eye contact with Buck's body in the hospital bed, the perfect picture of a grieving widow.

Episode 12 has the infamous couch scene which is meant to signal to the audience that Eddie is the couch Buck has been searching for, even if Buck himself doesn't know it. However, in the context of the secret relationship theory, what if the total lack of reaction from Eddie about Buck falling asleep on his couch is because they already know this?

Episode 13 has the infamous poker scene and this is where the theory actually diverges for a lot of people. Going with the original theory that buddie have been together since before 6A, this would explain Buck's lack of reaction to Eddie telling him to get dressed up and taking him out on what is essentially a date - he wasn't surprised or suspicious because it wasn't unusual. If you go back and watch the scene, you'll notice that it opens right when Buck and Eddie are approaching the door and about to be in the presence of other firefighters, but initially they're walking away from a dark alley while fixing their clothes - why would they need to fix their clothes unless they got messed up in the first place? Why wouldn't they show us the before or after of the poker scene, why only the parts where they're in the presence of other people from the department? Plus, Eddie really was looking TOO blatantly hungry in that entire scene, and he wasn't really hiding it from Buck - maybe because he's allowed, and expected, to look. This isn't even to mention the scenes of Buck, Eddie, and Christopher being a family, but I will go back to those later.

Where this episode splits this theory is the alternate potential for them to have gotten together after the poker game (my initial post after the episode first came out.) This would have been the perfect opportunity because there's really no way that if they weren't already together, the thought that this might be a date hadn't crossed Buck's mind (and, again, Eddie really did look too fucking horny in that scene it wasn't something you could ignore.) The next outside of work scene we see the Buckley-Diaz' in is the baking scene with Buck and Christopher. Eddie's location is completely unknown - he could be on shift, he could be running errands, he could be with Pepa - but the fact that Buck and Chris are together and baking for his class and planning dinner really drives home the fact that they are a family once again. However, the easy confidence of Buck parenting Christopher and the way he glowed with happiness in that moment would make even more sense if he had had his place in the Diaz family as Eddie's partner and Christopher's other parent confirmed to him.

One way to possibly combine the two theories is if we assume that Buck and Eddie were actually fwb throughout 6A (an idea given to me by @captainragtag) but actually got together after the poker scene. ANOTHER way is if we assume they've only been fwb, even after the poker scene. Them being fwb would potentially explain some holes in the theory, moments where they should have had a bigger reaction to something or known something beforehand if they were in a relationship (kind of the sperm donor arc and Eddie's reaction, but that could also be explained by Eddie's lack of reaction being because he already knew and was just pretending to be finding out for the first time with everyone else.)

Going into episode 14, all of these theories could explain the *gestures vaguely* everything about Eddie's storyline in the episode. If they're hiding a relationship, the absence of any mentions of Buck when talking about Eddie (and Christopher) being alone would make sense, especially after how pointedly the previous episode showed that Eddie is always spending his free time with Buck, with or without Christopher. It would also explain Buck's extremely unsubtle date-ruining advice - either they're together and Buck just doesn't want Eddie to go on the date because he doesn't want to share even to keep up pretenses, or they're fwb and Buck is jealous and afraid to lose Eddie and their relationship if Eddie starts actually dating. Also, considering how many pure fanfic tropes the writers have used before, it's safe to assume they have at least a baseline knowledge of how buddie are written by fans and what's the first trope every fanfic reader in this fandom learns about? Christopher's first and foremost wingman duty is to pack his stuff and go to a sleepover so his dads can do unholy things to each other. Christopher being at a sleepover when Pepa told Eddie to come over and him insisting that he was alone at home when just last episode we saw buddie spending all their time off shift together is just a little too sus if you ask me. Another secret relationship moment in the episode is Eddie going for the wrong gear shift in his own car. He initially reached for the gear shift on the center console when that's not where it is in his truck. But do you know where the gear shift is in a jeep? I'll give you one guess. Do we know anyone who owns a jeep? I'll give you another guess. This would make total sense since we know Eddie is a passenger princess and Buck would be driving them everywhere if they were in a relationship. Even when Buck isn't the one driving, Eddie would be much more likely to borrow his car more often if they were in a relationship and basically living together.

If this all doesn't convince you, I would like to leave you with the reminder of a moment that I'm sure has haunted all of us since 614 came out:

Actors are always aware when they're on camera and even if they aren't, the dozens of production people, including the director, would be. Do with that what you will.

(If anyone has anything they'd like to add to this feel free to message me or send me an ask and I'll make edits! And, I mean, this is all just for fun not to be taken seriously, but if there is a point that you think really brings the theory down also feel free to send me an ask about that lets see if I can provide a suitable explanation.)

edit: another thing to keep in mind as pointed out by the brilliant @swiftiebuckleys is the precedent set by 606 "Tomorrow" for flashbacks showing the start of a relationship.

#let me know if you have anything you'd like me to add otherwise say goodbye to secret relationship until 2024 #but she will be back. trust #911 fox #911 abc #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddie #weewoo brainrot

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thefencebeetle · 1 year ago

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All the social media websites are getting more unusable and un-user friendly by the day, I hate it, I hate it so much, this is awful and I am in fact suffering greatly from it

Stop being awful, why are websites so bad, stop showing me scam ads everywhere, why are bots so prominent, why is everything simultaneously sanitised to hell but exceptions are made for the worst of the worst, why isn’t anything customisable, why can’t I do anything that I want, this is absolute user hell, this is torture for the sake of data harvesting

And yet this is some kind of fucked up reverse prisoners dilemma, I can’t leave because everyone is also trapped here, and if I choose to leave I’ll be free but I’ll be alone, and in the dark about everything. I’ll be in the void. It’s either burning fire pits of content hell with everyone or the cold and lonely expanse of irrelevant nothingness.

I hate it

This is horrible

These websites are actively harming my mental health. I’ve been catching myself not only thinking about the dumbass "debates" I’ve seen online but even talking to people about them ! As if (!!!) they were(!!!) somehow (!!!) fucking relevant to anything actually real (!!!!!). I don’t want to know ! I just want the bare minimum of good thoughtful interaction ! I want to stay informed on the topics that interest me ! It takes so much work to get even the bear minimum of a curated experience I don’t want the every day controversy or the moronic takes or the fake and fleeting outrages that serves no purpose whatsoever. Please everyone should just learn to shut the fuck up, have some restraint, grow up, get a life ! Nobody’s got a life ?!?

In fact this is Millennial hell. We’ve collectively created and populated these spaces and we are rotting in them, we are festering and oozing out of them, and we are cannibalising them and ourselves simultaneously. This is our generational sin, we were born into the Internet and we made sure to choke it real hard and real good, to extinguish its light and creativity, to chose the shittiest options and blindly accept anything for the sake of recognition, clout. And we’re going to continue doing that because there’s no way we’re moving away from our acid vats we now call social media websites. We’re feeling far too cozy among our own shit and trash, like depressing hoarders who can’t even imagine their house clean anymore not realising they are destroying their living space and sharing it with an unholy number of critters, ready to eat them dead or alive, sooner rather than later.

Maybe we are the critters. But at least they have some kind of use. Our only use is to wallow and do nothing, be depressed and stare, get drained by endless bullshit, and give data, look at ads, be a marketing profile, no need to share anything anymore. Don’t be creative, don’t be weird, don’t act. Just scroll and consume and be artificially angry and react to things you wouldn’t have even noticed otherwise and let it eat through you and install itself in your brain like a true parasite. It whispers to you that you want it and need it. Feed it. Open that app again. What is it, like the 30th time today ? Check again for notes / views / retweets / likes. Nothing hm, better check again ! Better like more harder and faster ! Scroll a bit further ! Click on more buttons made to be scientifically enjoyable and rewarding ! Spin that content wheel ! React ! Comment some brainless emoji ! Get into more arguments !! Check for notes again !!! Maybe this time you’re famous !!!

I stare at the delete button of my account like its loaded with one bullet for that parasite in my brain. I’m not even sure it’ll be enough.

#nobody should be reading this rambling #tumblr isn’t better than any other website #i’ll quit if you all do it as well #we can make a new website and call it All or Nothing #it will definitely work #fuck all of this #you should stop reading the tags #this isn’t 2013 #we’re all adults #this is not okay #go do something different that isn’t on your phone or computer #read a book or write or paint or make food #go for a walk #touch some grass but for real #i need to do that actually #bye

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thesugarhole · 2 years ago

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thoughts from todays page readings: (it might be easier if i do it during commute but then post when im home?)

reread 49 real quick and again. i think i already wrote this so this is just me repeating myself but it will be relevant later so refresher course. as much as i love learning about captain this takes away a lot of whimsy by exposing part of whats up early on... like, youre no longer under that doubt that "is captain really nuts or is this for real the world they live in" you know?? keep some mystery man.

^feeling awkward reading this. dunno why

rubix cube chapter was so cute 🥺 im sad that thing got left behind

and again!!!! worst comic ever makes statement way ahead of its time regarding the internet!!! why does everything need to have fucking blue tooth log in connection talk directly to your brain!!! even a rubik (rubix) cube!!!! arrrgh!!!!!!

it doesnt mention annet by name but it implies that she will try and solve wishes/queries to the best of her ability (currently, think chatgpt lying through its teeth when it has nothing- when annet has nothing, she somehow creates it). nothing to note here just a detail i want to remember, "a god who answers" type of divinity

"Silly willy. Told you I am unsolvable!" I said smugly. Just then, something impossible happened. My User twisted me in 4 dimensions. "That's amazing!" I shouted. "I can't believe you've done it!" I didn't know Users were designed to operate in 4-dimensional space like this! "Hpmf" Charles said, not looking too impressed. "Well, that was surprisingly easy." "No! Charles! You don't understand!" I cried. "You can operate in 4-dimensional space! You've solved an impossible riddle! Something, within you, makes you simply incredible!" In this very moment the ropes holding us up snapped and Charles dropped me. When he let me go, I fell out of 4-dimensional synch into regular 3-dimensional space and all my 6 sides became discorded and unsolved once again.

sorry to squeeze the text to not make too long a post but

type of mysteries i want to hold on to for a little while longer ^

now that we know captain isnt bullshitting its even harder to be on snippys side on anything about anything because again. hes just some guy. he has no business knowing about any of this and he has yet to see it in action so why should he believe what captain says you known. needlessly frustrating the reader!!

"Are these children made up like the needy children to whom you and Pilot keep trying to gift my things to?" He asked, tapping his foot angrily. "All of the children I speak of are real, I assure you!" I said. "I doubt it," he huffed. "You're seriously the most absent-minded GIRL I know. Where would you even be without me?"

me at vitaly right now im going to fucking snap. stop doing this and let snippy perceive captain as Undefined. i get hes a Camone but good lord i dont think he would be this stubborn about this particular topic with everything else going on. like. captain allows it but it implies the reading of "zee got tired of correcting everyone" IF YOU KNOW YOU KNOW. and again i got extra beef with it because it definitely feels like backtracking on the nonbinary character to try and make a more main fronting hetero couple which grrrrr.

(...) There are monsters all around that will eat you if I don't protect you."

loss of whimsy (once again) in romantically only text because we know snippy isnt really doing anything other than survive. :( also more instances of snippy/captain being heavy handed in rewrites, i definitely dont remember any of this conversation when i first read the comic

listen its fine. its fine IF, ONLY IF both snippy and captain get this type of romantic dialogue with everyone else because 1. (and not to be a stubborn old mule about it but) reading this as '3 (+117) extraordinary people trying to get affection from 1 boring guy' makes it a lot funnier and engaging 2. you have to love something so so much to try and save it and since captain is trying to save whatever humanity is left in the world zee should be in love with the other guys just as much

^ its far from canon but it would be so fun, i genuinely mean this

"Do any of your organs feel infinite?" what an absolute deranged question to ask someone even with context. yes. now THIS dialogue i like

"Me and my wonderful coworkers, Goodness rest their weary, tuckered souls…"

numbers one through six are dead?? it makes sense i cant even begin to put an image to any of them sdjhgkj. captain considering eight a daughter though is kinda cute i wont lie

"I didn't fix the li..." I started to speak. "Good job on fixing the power here. I'm going to the bathroom," Charles rudely interrupted me again. I watched him depart from my table with a frown. Why was he so G-damn obtuse about things? My explanation was perfectly legible. Everyone else understood me just fine. Especially Pilot. Pilot understood what I was doing right away.

okay listen. im pilots number defender here. and!! as i said before he is VERY!!!! SMART!!!!! even with AFTER being PINEAPPLE BOMBED and ANNET DISCONNECTED!!! but im not sure to what degree he actually understands what you (captain) have going on and instead is just going with the flow of whatever you say. like he has background context, he knows about the stuff annet/g-dir was up to. but if he didnt know about this zero-eight business, which is parallel (and hidden from the public?) to a degree, before The Events then i dunno, might be a "why not, what else am i doing today" type of situation. you get what im saying? does this make sense?

Alas, I was too late. Charles had bumped into the lovely burrowing-worm in the bathroom entrance and then he started to scream.

points and laughs

#'OH GOD WHERES MY GUN' snippy moments #reading romac #sugar.txt

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pen-observing · 4 years ago

Text

I recently finished my fic in which Diavolo cheats on MC so it got me thinking; and someone was speculating which bro MC should move on with. So that is where this came from. You can tell how I started with big brain time but then my one brain cell remained at the end.

How the brothers react/pursue you after Diavolo cheats on you while married:

Lucifer:

He has had internal questions about what his own loyalty meant and represented. After all, he values it the most. He begins to question what it means to have sworn loyalty to the man who could not even be loyal to his spouse- to you.

As a friend he; does not let Diavolo rest and he judges him outwardly, but as a right-hand man; he knows that Diavolo’s ability to rule is unquestionable

Lucifer will not ask for understanding from you but he hopes you have it

He hopes you know that he can simultaneously judge the man while helping him care for the Devildom

In fact, you both have to be mature about this

Lucifer lets you go through all the emotions in front of him, in the privacy of the house. It is his way of showing you what true pride means. Why should Diavolo or other citizens see you suffering over an unfaithful man?

He tries to make your life as easy as possible. Your room is clean, everything is in order even If in a fit of anger, you leave it differently. You do not have to cook; you don’t really have to do anything besides get better. He would take on your work despite the obligations he has.

If Diavolo comes for business to the House, Lucifer will make sure you are far away and protected

He treats you oh so gently, as gently as he can

And through that gentleness and care- emotions rise and turn into something more

At first, your relationship is built in privacy.

The love, however, cannot be hidden from his brothers so they are the only ones who know

The Devildom is a cruel place; what would they say about Lucifer and you? Diavolo’s right hand man with Diavolo’s ex-spouse? Must have been an affair. They would claim you were the one who cheated

From that worry it remains private for quite some time.

However, there comes a point where privacy and secrecy become blurred.

Knowing that neither of you wanted secrecy just privacy, makes you both realize that there is no reason to hide something which developed so naturally.

So, when the next ball comes, you don’t shy away from dancing together even as Diavolo and the entire Devildom watches.

Mammon:

In my humble opinion, the best one for this situation, listen listen- I will explain

Why?

Mammon does not shy away from expressing distaste and hate towards Diavolo for you. He has no obligations, he hasn’t sworn loyalty to him, he hasn’t really gotten on his nerves before so he is completely free

As the second brother he can openly tell Diavolo what he thinks (Lucifer makes sure it doesn’t get out of hand) and Diavolo can’t really claim that he hasn’t cheated on you so Mammon has the upper hand in a weird way.

But here is the biggest reason

Mammon’s loyalty and his feelings for you are something you will never have a chance to doubt

He was your first, he loved you first and he continues to do so

His love washes over you, it never drowns you

He does not leave your side as emotions come washing over you.

He has enough sense to match them as well

Boy practically moves into your room and if sometimes you kick him out so what?

Belphie definitely did not find him guarding your door nor sleeping next to it to make sure you were okay on a particularly bad day

After you heal it only makes sense to love Mammon; the most loyal by choice. The one who helped you heal and made sure you were whole again

He doesn’t even ask for your love- he earns it.

In fact, you don’t even need to have the ‘Oh Great Mammon, what are we?’ convo anyone dreads because it is as obvious as his love from day one

Leviathan:

His mood oh my God okay listen carefully here

Does he feel disgust towards Diavolo? Does he feel anger towards the man? Yes. A lot of it.

Does he still know Diavolo is stronger? Does he think Diavolo is still the most desirable man considering his position, his power and influence? Also yes

He is envious of Diavolo but at the same time he knows that his faithfulness is 100/10

At least that is where Levi finds comfort, a sense of pride and confidence

But what overrides all of those emotions is when he sees how broken and sad you are over the whole thing

He even forgets about Diavolo and tries to do everything he can

Sure, his methods are unorthodox. Bringing you Beel’s big bowl of ice-cream at 3am because he saw it in in anime? This is what humans do right?

Who cares? he risked his life and Beel eating his Ruri-chan figurines for you

He goes on a spree to investigate how to help you and surprisingly, his emotions match yours quite well

You need to rant? Come, he will make up insults with you as well! Henry hears them all! The best place to rant is in front of his tank- It is big, bright, reminds you there is still light but the echo?? The acoustics of the place? Amazing for dramatic displays

You want to cry? Levi is awkward with reacting to such a display but he doesn’t run away from it

He never confronts Diavolo head on but a permanent glare is etched onto his face. Everyone knows what Levi is thinking

He subtweets like crazy

He heard you once say that hitting Diavolo’s face without repercussions would bring immense joy so what does he do? Ta-dah a game where Diavolo is the target and you shoot! Go go!! aim at the fool!

Honestly, Levi does not even think about pursuing you. He does whatever he can to be the Henry, to be the best friend to you.

Your trope is friends to lovers! And the best part is that Levi doesn’t even notice it!

You, absolutely have to be bold and confess to him first

And when you do---good luck trying to keep him from passing out

Satan:

It is a dark and dreadful day when this man finds out what happened.

Why is everything quiet? Why is everyone avoiding him? Did Devildom suddenly become devoid of life? Undead life, sure, but still life?

Satan is wrath but he is also the most composed of his brothers. It is tricky even to tell him because what if he reacts impulsively? Who would save everything in his path?

The way he finds out is what matters here

He is a gentleman, an analytical being who does not miss your body language but he lets you speak anyway

Approach him carefully but do not be afraid of him, please

Be as composed as you can when you tell him that Diavolo cheated on you

Immediately he will go into his Demon for but his eyes are on you

On you, human so much weaker than him who Is holding their own

So as angry as he is; livid. Furious. Seething. He knows that destruction is not the best option. His eyes hold care and worry directed towards you.

Satan realizes he has to meet your maturity if he wishes to help you.

And he does but,,,, he remains petty omg

Satan knows he is slick and sly enough to insult Diavolo any chance he gets without fear of repercussions because ‘he just go big brain time and you can’t punish his petty ways.’

Listen carefully, he has never won in chess against Diavolo but now,, he has the biggest desire to for your sake

On a spur takes you to the human world one day to remind you how resilient humans can be. In a library he starts showing you examples of love stories and how they are relevant to you

‘Satan I really do not think that Cleopatra has anything to do wi-’ ‘Trust me, I will explain it right now.’

In a way, anytime he mentions a human getting over heartbreak he admires you

Does not shy away from expressing it as you gradually move on from Diavolo either

Sometimes, he doesn’t even know how flirty he can be

What? Top 10 love stories in which the main character falls for a charismatic, charming guy after being cheated on? That is pure coincidence

In actuality, Satan makes you blush and feel a connection while you are in the process of moving on

As you heal from Diavolo Satan’s advances get bolder. He is still careful; he wants you to see him as an option but not mix up all of your emotions

Once you are fully over Diavolo, it is impossible not to almost momentarily recognize the feelings Satan has; not to recognize the feelings you have

He will approach you about it first and even if you are cute in denying them, he really doesn’t give any space for lying about them

Asmodeus:

Let us get something straight,,, Asmodeus is the best at picking up on body language

He has incredible empathy and sympathy for you

He notices all the small details and changes and knows how to help you

He can think of so many ways to get your mind off Diavolo it is impressive

But,,,but!

Asmodeus is not stupid.

Asmodeus is careful and calculating

At first, he lets his other brothers console you.

He gives them tips about it too! If they can’t come up with anything Asmo is a fountain of new ideas

It seems like he is there as a plus one to his brothers, it seems like he is avoiding you while still helping you from the shadows

Why?

Asmo is not dumb, Asmo knows what his sin is and what it represents

He is confident but he questions how you would react and treat him after what happened

If he spent more time and payed attention to Diavolo he could have reacted?

What if you blame him for what happened? What if you blame his sin? It is easy to say you blame the sin not Asmo himself but he can never be separated from it

Asmodeus worries about it- to everyone's surprise

So, seek him out. Seek out this hero who doesn’t want any credit for his ideas and comfort. It is his strange way of ‘making up to you’

As soon as Asmo sees you coming to him, and worrying about him despite what you are going through- he knows. He knows you do not separate him from his sin. He knows you don’t blame him in the slightest

So, prepare for the best recovery of your life

It is amazing how Asmo does it. His brothers are envious and amazed at his ability to comfort you and bring a smile to your face.

His ideas now have him involved as well! He is the biggest bonus!

Asmodeus in reality, through everything he does- puts self-love first.

He teaches you, outwardly and inwardly, how to have confidence and how to love yourself. He demands that you never doubt your self-worth.

In a way, while Asmo is openly flirtatious and comfortable, you have to bring it up first in a serious manner if you have fallen in love.

Beelzebub:

Excuse me?

You said what? Diavolo did what?

What happened?

Beelzebub asks a few times because he honestly finds it so hard to believe that Diavolo is not strong when it comes to self-control

He finds it incredibly hard to believe that Diavolo would be stupid to cheat on you?

He is not sly like Satan, he is not aggressive as Mammon, he is not quiet as Levi but he nonchalantly makes it obvious how he feels about what happened. A disinterested Beel at student council meetings, a sharp glare; some unkind words which just slip out.

Belphie is thrilled to see his brother like this but Beel has enough control to realize what truly matters is bringing you peace. How could he do that If he pays attention to Diavolo? Well.

His very presence brings you peace and comfort

Beelzebub knows how to enjoy life in simple aspects.

He doesn’t even try to be flashy to make you feel better

His natural charm, gentleness and warmth is all around you

Just staying next to him, in silence, is enough to make you feel better

Pursing you and pursing a relationship with one another, like all things, is very simple with this boy

Just like everything else

He would never hurt you and he became the best security you could ask for

He almost yeeted a piano at Diavolo when he came to visit Lucifer on business but alas, that is a different story

Belphegor:

He knows what happened. As soon as you walk through the door, he manifests there

Arms crossed; an eyebrow raised

‘I told you so.’

It becomes his favourite sentence

Definitely the tough love kind of friend (Same Belphie I felt that)

Because of this he never lets you forget how much Diavolo sucks

‘How could you trust a man who is afraid of pickles?’ ‘I-I don’t think that has anything to do wi-’ ‘It obviously does.’

He already threatened Diavolo before, he made Diavolo go emo. His sarcasm and snide remarks do not rest

Everything is intensified with this boy

You want to rant about Diavolo? The best. He will rant more than you and even tell you embarrassing stories you didn’t know about the guy

‘One time, he heard about weed and made Barbatos bring it to him. Do you know how embarrassing a gold joint it? Anyway- he thought the Devildom turned into a game and followed Lucifer around for 5 days thinking he was a secret spy.’

Belphegor would make sure you sleep and get enough rest because, according to him, that is where healing starts. He will get your consent to use his powers on you first tho.

In reality, Belphegor is not shy with his advances but they would fly over your head most of the time

After a while he will absolutely confess when he is secure enough that you feel the same

Why? If you like the ‘I have fallen in love and didn’t even realize it until his great romantic gesture’ trope- Belphie is your man.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me headcanons #obey me imagines #obey me hc #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #diavolo #cheating #reactions #x reader

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luna-light-eclipse · 2 years ago

Text

Greetings you evil bastards! (I mean that in a friendly way). ‘Tis I! The one who keeps reading all your fun AU’s and idea’s, throughly enjoying them and never saying anything. You have set my brain onto the strongest AU related tangent that I’ve had in a very long time, off on the train of my very favourite type of angst.

The type where everything is just irreversibly bad.

So here I am, rambling at y’all instead of just hovering.

Exile wolf… I am in love with this entire concept. So I started to think, what if wolf really wants to come back, they never stop wanting to come back. That is their only home where the people they care about are, but they’ll never be let back so they give up that hope of coming home.

After Sundance being killed, Cayde being in a coma and everyone turning on them they quite rightfully fly off the handle for a while and slay anything/anyone that was even vaguely involved in trying to kill Cayde. Petra sends them relevant information throughout this purely because she doesn’t want the wolf pointing their newly found insatiable rage on her and the awoken.

The quicker Uldren is dead the faster wolf will leave is how Petra thinks of it. She’s right, wolf puts a dozen bullet holes in Uldrens head and then promptly fucks off to let the awoken pick up the pieces.

Only to be left drifting through space with no destination because normally they’d go back to the tower after something like that, the exile part really hits them now. Now they have no new missions and nowhere to report to.

Ghost whose been extremely worried for his gaurdian who hasn’t said a peep since The Cayde Incident nervously suggests going back to the cosmodrome. Head back to your roots when you are lost type thing.

What ghost wanted wolf to get from this was ‘things have been bad before, when you didn’t know about what was next and had a single broken gun to your name and yet everything turned out alright! Remember learning about what it meant to be a gaurdian!’

Wolf takes the lesson as, ‘ah there’s still plenty of things that need killing in the solar system.’

The vanguard feel justified in their opinion that their former hero has gone completely nutty off the wall from the reports of the trail of sheer utter destruction they’ve been leaving in their wake. They’re not wrong that wolf has lost the plot but they are wrong about literally everything else.

This goes on for years, with wolf only pausing in jumping about the solar system deciding which poor sods they want to metaphorically nuke that day when a crisis happens. In which they decide that the current big bad is what they want want to wipe of the map only to return to what they’d been doing previously.

New lights a patrolling guardians occasionally report to the vanguard to report in rightful terror that they’d come across wolf while they were out and yup, still killing everyone and yes they’re becoming increasingly more ‘twitchy’ with every encounter.

There’s rumours throughout the guardians about wolfs various exploits, when someone says ‘they showed up out of nowhere, killed a vex Minotaur with a single hit and then killed everything else in a wave of light’ no one doubts it because this is just common wolf behaviour nowadays.

What they aren’t seeing is wolf stumbling back to their ship on unsteady feet with ghost pleading with them each time to just please get some sleep, please eat something or even just sit down for a moment- because wolf hasn’t taken a break once since that day. Instead they just keep going and going until they collapse and die only to get back up and keep going the moment ghost revives them. (And sometimes ghost considers leaving it for a few hours. Perhaps his guardian can get even a short break this way except he won’t because he’s the only one his guardian has left to trust and he won’t abuse that even slightly).

Before wolf heads into battle they’ll put a bullet through their own head so ghost can revive them back to health so nothing, not even their own health, will interrupt them.

Ghost is also so very pissed at all of their former allies for this, because there is nothing he can do to help wolf. No words he can say that’ll get them to stop. But they won’t leave wolf, he’ll never leave his guardian.

Beyond light happens… weirdly. Elsie has just been watching all of this go down and has decided long ago to just not touch any of it even with a very very long pole (she is so not on board with giving wolf stasis). She doesn’t get a choice when wolf shows up to Europa wielding it anyways if entirely unintentionally because the witness just dropped the power on wolfs head hoping to destabilise them further except now wolf is just as equally pissy at the darkness as they was before and everything that comes into contact with them keeps getting uncontrollably iced. (They don’t hold ghost anymore because they’re terrified of hurting him).

Elsie brings up Eris and Drifter only once. She suddenly becomes privy to a slim fraction of what’s going behind the wolfs general blankness as their face twists into pure fury and everything gets coated in a thick layer of ice (Elsie not dodging fast enough leaving her legs trapped). Wolf then says the only words they had since being exiled. In a voice far calmer than their expression would suggest they tell Elsie to never bring them up again.

She’s never agreed to anything faster in her life.

Wolf gains control of stasis with Elsie’s help and then leaves only occasionally popping back up for stasis advice.

Then eventually, Cayde wakes up. He asks about wolf and is horrified to hear what they’ve done. He tries to protest it but no one believes him. Instead giving him pity, ‘it’s so sad that Cayde’s own mind is lying to him because of how terrible of a thing wolf had done’ is the general opinion of literally everyone in the tower. And Cayde can’t leave. He wants to go out there and hunt down wolf and tell them ‘I know you didn’t do it, I know you’ve done nothing wrong’ except without Sundance and with his supposed deteriorated mental state they won’t let him out they won’t even let him near the damn comms equipment and there is no one who’d help him.

House of light arrives to the city and Cayde dives into helping them because that’s what wolf would do. He is allowed to do this because everyone is pleased to just see him not stalking about the tower in agitation (they do stick some poor unfortunate guardian on him though to escort him to and from the tower, Cayde is more than displeased to have been stuck with a babysitter). Tensions begin to rise between the humans and Eliksni, Cayde has no idea of what he can do to alleviate it since they all question every word that comes out of his mouth.

Then, just as things reach a boiling point, all the screens in the city change to a video. It’s wolf, it’s wolf in the city and Lakshmi struggling underfoot, what follows is a very public execution. Caydes heart drops, not because his faith in wolf has wavered but because there is no chance of anyone being convinced that wolf is good now. At the same time he can’t help but mentally praise the brilliantness of wolfs actions. Attention has been diverted away from the Eliksni. They can’t be accused of Lakshmi’s death because everyone watched what happened. Not only that but the biggest voice of propaganda has been removed.

(But now Cayde is haunted by Wolfs dead and hollow expression. At the darkness wielded in their hands. Their eyes are shadowed, hair limp and matted and they just seemed so frail despite the power at their fingertips. It’s the first time he’s seen wolf since that day and they’re doing worse that even he could have imagined. He’d poured over the reports so many times but none of them explained how much pain his friend was in.)

It’s at the final battle where they realise, when they arrive at the battlefield only for wolf to trap their former allies in a cage (a shield) made of light and dark. They watch them fight, watch them die and get back up so many times. They watch ghost be killed and yet still wolf gets back up.

The witness asks, at some point, just why they’re so determined to protect the people that abandoned them. Wolf doesn’t answer, but it’s because they still care about them. Despite everything they’ve done to wolf they’re still the wolfs precious people. They haven’t been able to stop caring this entire time.

Wolf gets back up, they kill the witness. They collapse to the ground. As the shield begins to fade away wolf begins to cry out names, begging for them like a scared child. Zavala, Ikora, Saint, Osiris, even Ghost- the list goes on and on as wolf tries to crawl their way somewhere except their body is too broken to do so.

They rush to help them at the sound of their terrified voice except when they make contact wolf screams in terror and tries to fling themselves away. They back off and notice now the blood smeared across their face, eyes blank and likely ears deaf too. They can’t touch wolf without terrifying them and they can’t force it because if they weren’t careful wolf could still kill them- on accident- even like this.

They’re unable to do anything but watch as wolf slowly quietens down and stills, there’s a small whisper yet they all hear what they say. One last name.

Wolf asks for Cayde.

No one knows what to do. They’ve done irreparable damage to the one who cared about them the most. They listen in somber silence to wolfs murmurs.

“Cayde? I thought I wanted to die but I don’t- I don’t want to die- Cayde I want to go home.”

It is only as wolf takes their final breath that Zavala can approach. A kneels down and rests a hand upon their head and mourns. “I am so sorry.” He whispers to their unhearing ears.

All that’s left now is to bring their body back home. Back to Cayde.

Edit: I can’t believe I forgot something that I was going to add. Crow, when faced with the option to have his memories returned to him by Savathun, refuses. Because in the back of his mind was Cayde’s constant pleading for wolfs innocence. There’s the fear that Cayde is right. In Uldren’s memories is the truth of what happened that day and he can’t bring himself to face them.

I feel mildly bad about not answering those asks yet BUT I've been really busy so I'm just gonna leave some old drabbles and other stuff I've collected here

---

"There is nothing in any vex simulation or psion prediction that could keep me from being a thorn in the side of existence"

-YW, after coming back from the dead, in some probable AU I'll never write

---

“I’m… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you. But, I’ll be fine, you can-” They hug him tighter as he starts to push away from them.

…They aren’t letting him go, are they?

“...Guardian,” he warns, “Put me down. Now.”

They only let out a garbled hum in response, perfectly happy to squeeze the life out of him.

“We do not have time for this- I will stab you, let-”

“You and what army, old man?” Even through the layers of harsh static, the smug edge to the Young Wolf’s voice was abundantly clear to anyone listening. They were as infuriating and stubborn as ever.

And Saint and that flamboyant Cloudstrider were not helping.

“We- We have work to do, you can show your affections later- Saint! Stop laughing!”

---

Crow: Why does The Guardian call you babygirl?

Sam Moleyn: how about we stop talking for awhile

---

Ann, banging on the door: Guys! I need you to hide me! Noble, ushering her in: Ann, what happened?! Ann: G! I spilled bleach on their cloak- Noble, pushing her back out: Not a chance. You’re on your own. Ann: Wait- They’ll kill me-! Noble, slamming the door: Goodbye.

---

Wolf: STOP IT Wolf: STOP TALKING ABOUT BEING POSSESSED Ghost: i’m free real estate Wolf: YOU ARE NOT FREE REAL ESTATE-

---

Crow: How do I get revenge? Ann: I am legally obliged to tell you ‘forgiveness’. Crow: Guardian, how do I get revenge? Ruin, “Godslayer”: I am also legally obliged to say ‘forgiveness’, but you- Noble, putting his hand over their mouth: I’m gonna stop you right there.

---

ALSO SOME LORE

Wolf is canonically a little shit but also terrifying. You love to see it

---

Ann: Let’s apologize on the count of 3. Phyra: I didn’t do anythin- Ann: 1… 2… 3. Phyra: Ann: Ann: see, now I’m just disappointed in both of us Phyra: intense glaring

---

"In the Age of Triumph, in the final battle, when the light began to wane, one stood. Burned by the embers of Armageddon, their soul blistered by the fires of hell and tainted beyond redemption, they choose the path of perpetual torment. In their ravenous hatred, they found no peace; and with fiery conviction, they scoured the Ascendant realms, seeking vengeance against the dark Disciples who wronged them. They wore the crown of the Iron Lords, and those that tasted the bite of their sword named them... The Young Wolf."

i don't know what i was on for this one, but I rediscover it every once in awhile and alter it a bit

---

"He's all they've been thinking about, but he's going to have to get used to their absence. The flat will be quiet. The Tower, normal... Their bed, empty.

It's how things must be.

Things could be different in another life, perhaps.

But not this one.

They have to go, one day soon."

-on Crow-YW angst about Wolf's predicted death.

#destiny 2 #I don’t know how many of you three will see this but whatever #I just had to get it out #btw I’m crying now thanks #but also thanks for just enjoying your AU’s I would’ve have gotten to write this otherwise #I did consider an idea where everyone figures that Cayde is just too damaged and he gets reset so then its like Oof you reset your friend #also I just noticed in one tag I put would’ve instead of wouldn’t have but I can’t fix that without hassle and I’ve spent hours on this so

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mrs-bartowski · 4 years ago

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My dudes. My guys. My pals.

I’m about 10 seconds away from going feral.

So, I’m the kind of unfortunate chump whose brain requires continuity. Meaning, when I started thirst watching Supergirl during its mid-season-2 hiatus and came across the realization that it had crossovers with all the other arrowverse shows, my brain tasked me with watching them all. I won’t put you through a recount of this arduous feat, but it does leave me with the certain advantage of having immediate and full-contextual access to any parallels between supercorp and canon CW DCEU couples.

Normally, this is a good thing, because it’s just another crumb to obsess over. But I just finished watching Legends 6x02 and...I. AM. FUMING.

I literally don’t even know where to start, but know that if you’ve made it this far you’re in for a long ride because my entire being is in Scream mode right now and I’m not sure I’ll be able to stop typing until it passes.

OKAY. So.

Meet Sara Lance (lol jk y’all thirsty gays know who she is I mean look at this flawless human)

Next, meet her ******* Ava Sharpe (who is literally the definition of white European beauty standards-based perfection because she’s a clone from the future)

And finally, meet Gary Green. He’s...well, he’s Gary.

Sara started out on Arrow and is now the captain of the Legends. Ava was the director of the Time Bureau and Gary was an agent, and now they are also members of the Legends. Sara has been there (and been the show’s effective lead) since season 1. Ava and Gary both came in at the beginning of season 3.

Gary is (as pictured) an absolute fool, but he is also kind of regarded as the one the Legends Must Protecc. The whole team is considered a family, and, while they are not necessarily labeled as best friends, Gary has been Ava’s longest and most loyal companion, and Sara has a way of adopting him because she’s the best equipped to keep him out of trouble.

So, why is all of this relevant to why I want to go feral? Because it sounds a bit familiar, yes? Member of the team that is somewhat a black sheep, doesn’t get included fully or all the time but often comes in with save-the day type shit (even though with Gary it’s more of a distraction than a save because he’s a mess of a man). Close friend to one of our two main heroes and, subsequently, that hero’s closest companion puts them at the top of their Protecc list. Has little faith in his relationships with the team so he is constantly going out of his way to help in whatever way he can to prove his usefulness. And so on and so forth.

Well, 6x01 marks exactly 3 years since Gary’s first appearance, and what did we find out in that episode? That Gary is an alien. And not just any alien - an alien who was sent (by the woman he was traded to) to get close to Sara because she has been labeled as one of the world’s most dangerous creatures. Not to mention, his species of alien feeds on humans (not him of course, he’s reformed, but nonetheless not a friendly species). And we find out all of this because he and his master abduct her.

Sara finds out in person while Ava and the rest of the Legends solve the mystery on their own. Now, I’ve drawn a lot of comparisons between Lena and Gary to make a point about the time frame and nature of their relationships, but let’s take a look at Sara, shall we? For starters, she’s been “dead” either literally or supposedly about...what, 15 times now? If you think that’s an exaggeration, here’s the link to her fan wiki which says she’s been presumed dead 10 times and actually dead 5. The sg writers tried to sell season 5 as “the fight for Lena’s soul” but Sara LITERALLY LOST HER SOUL when she got resurrected in the Lazarus pit. 90% of Sara’s character development has been based on her certainty that she is too close to death and evil and destruction (getting possessed by a demon, perhaps, had something to do with this?). She was an actual literal assassin and she has left civilization out of anger and pain to go back to that life once before.

She has always believed that she is too dangerous to have real love or relationships or friends. And now she has found and built and led this family through time and space and she’s done so with this goofball by her side that is endearingly attached to the love of her life. So, how does she react when she finds out Gary is an alien? Well, clearly, she goes down a dark path, right? She cries and screams and talks about betrayal because she’s had such a hard time with feeling like she only ever puts the people she loves in danger and now here she is finding out there’s been a human-eating alien in her family for three years that was tasked with observing her and keeping her in check because she is exactly that dangerous?

Yeah...try again. This is how Sara reacts:

youtube

And then there's another scene that apparently no one even bothered to put on YouTube where you can see the pain in Sara's eyes when she asks him “why me?” You can see how hurt she is that after 3 years she’s just finding out that their friendships is based on lies and that she has trouble keeping her faith in it. But in both of these instances where are the “crocodile tears?” Where are the fearful, shaky confessions from Gary about his fear of losing the only people who have ever really loved or cared about him and desperate justifications about how he just wanted to protect them and keep them in the dark so his master didn’t come after them? Where is the outrage from Sara about how everything Gary has reassured her about over the past three years when she was scared to let the damaged-soul assassin inside of her out was a lie and he doesn’t get to tell her who or what she is again? Where is the determination from Ava to make Gary pay for not only lying for three years but for ABDUCTING THE LOVE OF HER LIFE TO HAND OVER TO A FLESH-EATING ALIEN??????

Nowhere. Those things...they’re nowhere. There’s anger. There’s pain. There’s doubt and heartbreak and fury. There’s betrayal and helplessness and desperation. But there is no scene with Sara standing on a balcony and Gary looking up at her longingly because he wants to talk to her about the secret and he knows it will change everything between them. There is no scene with Sara and Ava lamenting over what this means for Gary and the team and the world because he’s no longer the person they knew. There are no romantically-scored scenes of them looking teary-eyed at the pictures they took together or reassurances that the others’ intentions are good and trustworthy now that the truth is out in the open. There is nothing to imply that the last several years of friendship are now entirely suspect (damaged, frayed, clouded, maybe, but definitely not voided) because Gary kept this secret to protect them. And Gary isn’t made to feel obscenely guilty or shameful because his intentions were good and he only did what he felt he had to. But most of all, the world doesn’t feel like it’s going to end.

And I’m not talking about we’re now scared Gary will take his master’s side or Sara will suddenly decide that she never wants an alien to fool her or hurt her again so she’s going to make sure he doesn’t have the choice. I’m just talking about the way they address each other. There are no sobbing tears or laments over the biggest mistakes of their lives - even though it’s quite possible Gary could see this as his. There are no screaming matches over betrayal and mistrust and years of doubt and confusion. There will be no episode dedicated to going back and seeing what could have happened - what kind of danger they could have avoided from the alien(s) controlling Gary - had he told them the truth sooner because that’s the only way to save him and the world. There will be no episode where he has to single-handedly save them multiple times as some example of redemption. There will be no adamant looks and declarations about how the team knows his intentions were good and they forgive him. There won’t be any of that. Because Sara is not in love with Gary. And Ava is not in love with Gary. And Gary is not in love with either Sara or Ava. They’re just close friends. Family. Loved ones who mean a lot to each other but whose betrayal and seeds of doubt don’t bring on emotions whose force and ferocity could be acceptable for finding out the apocalypse is nigh.

I have many, many more feelings about this but right now I’m going to go write things that will make me feel better and not things that make me want to gather every writer from every CW show in a line and run down the line smacking them all in the face while the Legends writers watch and cheer. But I’m fuming. THIS is what it looks like when a years-long, heavily weighted lie is revealed between close friends/family. So, in conclusion, Supercorp endgame or die.

#supercorp #supercorp endgame #cw supergirl #supergirl #the cw #the cw network #legends of tomorrow #avalance #gary green #ava sharpe #sara lance #kara danvers #lena luthor #legends of tomorrow spoilers #Youtube

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