#they are LITERALLY also crowley and aziraphale in real life

[koifishhies]

dan and phil are not real. what do you mean they accidentally set up their house so that the bathroom mirror reflects into the computer screen in another room. what do you mean dan literally passed out and phil thought he was twerking. WHAT DO YOU MEAN they won an rpf tournament against jesus. what are they what factory made them.

[tenok]

.

[shitpostingkats]

An Asexual's love letter to Good Omens 2

There's an infamous quote by Neil Gaiman going around, regarding the general vibe of season 2, and many people (I believe humorously) yelling that it could not be further from the truth. Particularly in the last episode, where that happens.

I disagree.

The final episode of season 2 was deeply, deeply comforting to me. 

I am asexual. Have been my whole life. Even before I had the words to describe what that was, child-me had this feeling in their gut of being an outlier, that everyone was exaggerating, or in on some joke, that I wasn’t privy to. Because I was bombarded on all sides by shows and movies and books, telling the same story of love, again, and again, and AGAIN. It’s drilled into our brains with the same fervor as the days of the week, or the quadratic formula. Meet-cute -> misunderstanding ->declaration of feelings ->kiss. More or less steps can be added to account for runtime or complexity of narrative, but that’s the basic structure that a relationship follows. It MUST be, because that’s the formula every character who's ever been in a story goes through, often times when it even feels like an add-on, like it’s only there because this is a story, there HAS to be a romance. And it has to follow the steps.

For a long time, I felt love wasn’t for me, because if there’s only one way to be in love, I sure as hell wasn’t feeling it. 

Instead, the relationship I ended up in looked a lot like what Beezlebub and Gabriel go through. Meeting someone routinely until it starts to feel comfortable. Getting to know them and slowly growing more attached. Eating chips and listening to music.

We like to joke whenever someone asks us how long we’ve been together, because the answer is we just sort of slowly fell into it, and we honestly don’t know when the line got blurred between ‘friends’ and ‘partners’. And, at least for me, a good deal of that confusion, that hesitancy to label, came from the fact that what I was feeling, what we were, couldn’t be love. It couldn’t be romantic. 

We were just quiet and gentle.

And that wasn’t love.

Because it was slow, because it wasn’t physical, because there was no structure aside from consistency and companionship. Because it didn’t follow the Rules.

Then I found myself in stories, and it felt like a revelation.

Beelzebub and Gabriel aren’t the first time I’ve seen a love like I feel represented in a narrative, but it never stops feeling special. And I don’t know if I’ll ever stop celebrating it.

Throughout the sequence in the pub, I kept expecting them to “confirm” Gabriel and Beelzebub. A dramatic line, a kiss, a whatever. That’s what I’ve been taught to expect, after all, that’s the only way a relationship is “real”. Of course, this doesn't mean Crowley and Aziraphale sharing a dramatic kiss is wrong, or that I can’t see why it resonated with so many people, but for me. Those moments in the pub are worth so much more.The last scene might have been literally showstopping, but those handful of moments between the duke of hell and an archangel were the beating heart of the season for me. A simple love story in four scenes. No kisses. No ‘I love you’s. Not even any definition of what. The love Gabriel and Beelzebub have is strong enough for them to both want to shatter their worlds and flee their lives and it's just. 

It's just that. 

Two people in a pub, playing the other's favorite song, giving a little gift, buying a packet of crisps. 

That sequence means far more to me than any kiss ever could.

Love isn’t only real when it's hot and sudden and ephemeral, it can also be

Quiet.

And gentle.

And still romantic.

Still real.

[nonightingalesinberkelysquare]

WARNING FOR GOOD OMENS SPOILERS!!!!

FURTHER SLIGHT SPOILER WARNING FOR THE FOLLOWING BOOKS: The Bone Clock by David Mitchell, You Only Call When You're In Trouble by Stephen Mcauley, and Bibliomaniac by Robin Ince.

Edit: Photos by @polychromicron-persei-8 !!!!!

So I'm sure a lot of the fandom have seen the pictures posted by a very lucky fan who saw the production of good omens happening out in Scotland today!!

However what I'm not seeing people talk about is a hidden gem in the reblogs.

SOMEONE HAD MANAGED TO GET A PICTURE OF THE BOOKS IN THE WINDOW!!!

Naturally, I had to go and do my research to see if these books give us any clues or serve any other purposes other than decorative purposes

AND LET ME TELL YOU

These are the the books visible in the window:

I'll go through them one by one

(Please bear in mind, I haven't read any of these books personally!! The only information I have on them are the little bits I found online in a very rushed attempt at research!!!)

Okay firstly

"The Bone Clocks" by David Mitchell

Now, this is the one that I struggled to make sense of the most out of the three.

The story appears to follow a runaway teenage girl who is a "lightning rod for psychic phenomena." These visions are said to reorder reality and send her into a real life nightmare.

However,

It also states that there is a boy who eventually crosses paths with her and who's story "comes together in moments of grace and extraordinary wonder"

As I said, I've never read these books and the only link I could begin to make with this is the idea of a "supernatural being meets another supernatural being and what they can do when they're together defies anyone's wildest dreams" story, similar to what we have seen and could see in GO3.

The next book is where it gets FARRRR more interesting (in my opinion)

NOW

THE TITLE? INTERESTING ASF.

IS AZIRAPHALE IN TROUBLE? OR EVEN CROWLEY?

The quotes are literally taken from the amazon listing itself, but I'll just point out the bits that stuck out to me personally.

☆ "is it ever okay to stop caring for others and start living for yourself?"

And I'm skipping a HUUUUGE chunk of the story here so apologies

☆ "Tom does what he's always done - answers the call."

☆ "Thus begins a journey that will change everyone's life and demonstrate the beauty or dysfunction (or both?) of the ties that bind families together and sometimes strangle them."

THAT LAST QUOTE REALLY STICKS OUT TO ME. Personally, I'd say that could possibly relate to the heaven and hell divides?

But furthermore, we were told prior to the whole NG situation that Aziraphale and Crowley aren't talking.. so could that mean that as soon as they begin speaking once again, they have the power to leave heaven and hell behind? Perhaps stop the divides?

And last, but certainly not least

Now, keep in mind that this particular book is nonfiction and appears to be written from the authors own point of view as he aims to visit 100 bookshops in 100 days.

This has a relatively short description from what I can see right now so I'll put it in here

"Bibliomaniac takes the reader on a journey across Britain as Robin explores his lifelong love of bookshops and books - and also tries to find out just why he can never have enough of them.

It is the story of an addiction and a romance, and also of an occasional points failure."

This one interested me SO much because it SCREAMS Aziraphale character development sort of thing? You know?

I really struggled to find any spoilers for this one whatsoever but one website did mention the author's love for vintage books, which he only ever reads as and when, as opposed to focusing on just one book.

I just thought this was SO SO SOOOOO interesting, and if anybody has any differing thoughts/interpretations or has even read the books, the comment section is a safe space to do so!!! All theories/suggestions are welcomed (any hate WILL be blocked, don't test me).

OR MAYBE THIS ALL MEANS NOTHING AND IM JUST CLOWNING FAR TOO HARD?!??!??!

[unforgivable-thatswhatiam]

The (Ineffable) Art of Loving

The secret of GO lies in the pure beauty and profound depth of Crowley and Aziraphale’s relationship. Theirs is one of the most moving love stories I’ve ever encountered in fiction—without a doubt.

They weren’t made to love each other. And yet, they discover that they are.

From the day 1, they struggle against their feelings — the attraction, the fascination, the longing. But despite five millennia of efforts before the Arrangement began, they can’t stay apart.

So, they make a choice. Perhaps not fully realising it was love at the time — but still, they chose each other.

“Love isn't something natural. Rather it requires discipline, concentration, patience, faith, and the overcoming of narcissism. It isn't a feeling, it is a practice.”

I think these words perfectly describe what Crowley and Aziraphale share. And I hope that Erich Fromm wouldn't mind if in this post I'll quote his The Art of Loving to explore more deeply the nature of the bond that binds the Ineffable Couple, their real love.

First, they show concentration on the other

They have patience - and respect for the other's needs

They have faith in the other - put their lives in the other's hands

There isn't in them - or I haven't noticed - any narcissism to overcome.

They aren't the typical dysfunctional fictional couple that audiences are trained to romanticise. They're not some Ross&Rachel or Buffy&Spike. Their relationship is anything but dysfunctional.

Aziraphale and Crowley don't hurt each other out of whim or caprices or the tropes of longing streched thin by time and space, they hurt each other because they love too much: I can't give you holy water, it'll destroy you completely; you are so clever, but also so stupid for still believing God might do something for the humans, but She ignores all of us; and so on with other painful truths spoken when love has nowhere safe to land.

To love someone whose very nature is meant to oppose yours — who was literally made to be your enemy and has the precise office to cancel you out — as an angel and a demon, should be impossible. It's difficult even for us, ordinary humans with our different natures! It seems unthinkable for them. And yet... their bond is ineffable.

Across the centuries, we see them dance together and get their own rhythm, softening the edges. They adapt, adjust, and grow — in the words of Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, not only gazing at each other, but looking together in the same direction too.

And they choose. Again and again, they choose.

“Love is a decision, it is a judgment, it is a promise. If love were only a feeling, there would be no basis for the promise to love each other forever. A feeling comes and it may go. How can I judge that it will stay forever, when my act does not involve judgment and decision?”

“Love is not primarily a relationship to a specific person; it is an attitude, an orientation of character which determines the relatedness of a person to the world as a whole, not toward one “object” of love.”

“If I truly love one person I love all persons, I love the world, I love life. If I can say to somebody else, "I love you," I must be able to say, "I love in you everybody, I love through you the world, I love in you also myself.”

They love each other, and they love humanity too, even if it puts them at risk. To love, in a world of orders and oppositions, is dangerous, sometimes even lethal.

But they love anyway. From always.

“What does one person give to another? He gives of himself, of the most precious he has, he gives of his life. This does not necessarily mean that he sacrifices his life for the other—but that he gives him of that which is alive in him; he gives him of his joy, of his interest, of his understanding, of his knowledge, of his humor, of his sadness—of all expressions and manifestations of that which is alive in him. In thus giving of his life, he enriches the other person, he enhances the other's sense of aliveness by enhancing his own sense of aliveness. He does not give in order to receive; giving is in itself exquisite joy. But in giving he cannot help bringing something to life in the other person, and this which is brought to life reflects back to him.”

Here we have a crowd of exemples, when it comes to the sacrifice: Crowley saving Aziraphale from the Blitz, Aziraphale giving the Holy Water, knowing what it might mean... Moreover, every time they meet, every time they speak they risk their life.

And they are full of each other's life, having something that in many long-term marriages is only a dream: to know each other by heart, to carry the other always within oneself. In magic, books, sadness, anxiety, tone of voice, sarcasm, glances...

"He does not give in order to receive; giving is in itself exquisite joy.”

"But in giving he cannot help bringing something to life in the other person, and this which is brought to life reflects back to him."

“Mature love is union under the condition of preserving one’s integrity, one’s individuality. Love is an active power in man; a power which breaks through the walls which separate man from his fellow men, which unites him with others; love makes him overcome the sense of isolation and separateness, yet it permits him to be himself, to retain his integrity. In love the paradox occurs that two beings become one and yet remain two.”

Infantile love follows the principle: "I love because I am loved." Mature love follows the principle: "I am loved because I love." Immature love says: "I love you because I need you." Mature love says: "I need you because I love you."

My favourite one. The first line isn't given to our ineffable pair, but we can find its echo in Adam. He's truly loved by his family, and because of that love, he loves Tadfield and the familiar world around him: he chooses love too, he chooses not to be the Antichrist, giving up unimaginable power in order to protect everything he loves.

Mature love follows the principle: "I am loved because I love"

Immature love says: "I love you because I need you." Expressed e converso, in denial - by both of them

Mature love says: "I need you because I love you"

“Love is an activity, not a passive affect; it is a “standing in”, not a “falling for”.

“Love is possible only if two persons communicate with each other from the center of their existence, hence if each one of them experiences himself from the center of his existence. Only in this “central experience” is human reality, only here is aliveness, only here is the basis for love. Love, experienced thus, is a constant challenge; it is not a resting place, but a moving, growing, working together; even whether there is harmony or conflict, joy or sadness, is secondary to the fundamental fact that two people experience themselves from the essence of their existence, that they are one with each other by being one with themselves, rather than by fleeing from themselves. There is only one proof for the presence of love: the depth of the relationship, and the aliveness and strength in each person concerned; this is the fruit by which love is recognized.”

But they are not whole — not yet: neither is one with himself, they flee from themselves. Each admires the other’s best, loves his uniqueness, and silently wishes he could accept it too: yellow is pretty — Aziraphale longs for Crowley to show openly his demonic and beautiful eyes and spread their yellow everywhere, and with this, the beautiful soul he hides behind dark glasses; Crowley, in turn, treasures Aziraphale's gentle heart and softness — that set him apart from other angels — and wishes Aziraphale wouldn't feel guilty or less angelic because of these. This is what goodness truly is, not blind obedience to orders, even from God, but compassion.

Still, they are more complex than humans. Crowley can't fully accept himself because he didn't mean to fall, he never truly understood the reasons of his demonic condition and so he couldn't fully accept it — yet he can't return to being an angel either, because they are "just pretendy good", not "properly good". Now he's only himself, less brilliant than his angel, not fully demonic, but perhaps still too much a demon to believe he could ever be fully loved by an angel. As a demon, he also feels powerless to protect the angel he loves from both Heaven and Hell, which means he can’t fully live this love in the open. The same is true for Aziraphale, who thinks he's not enough for Crowley's love, and struggles to accept himself also because he's still tied to a toxic and abusive Heaven - that has traumatised him but, even more, has deeply hurt his demon. And he couldn't do anything to stop it. He represents Heaven, somehow, and fears Crowley can't love him fully for that (even though he's the one who Crowley still calls angel).

They don't accept themselves, so they can't love themselves - and as a result, both fear they are not enough for the other, that they are unworthy of being loved (beautifully explained in this post by @dalliancekay), and they suffer for fear of abandonment too. Aziraphale because everytime they argue Crowley walks away (then returns, but...), except in the Final15, and Crowley is shaped by his trauma: he has already been abandoned, betrayed and metaforically killed (his POV) by Someone who claimed to love him.

But no love for another can be complete without self-love. Without it, love becomes fearful and needy. A love like this may be unconditional, but it stops being free, turns a relationship into a lifeline, the first if not the sole reason to go on. And no one can love wholly or safely without first loving themselves.

Actually, neither of them wants to be what they were institutionally made to be; instead, they belong to their own side, defined by human morality and human love. And they can't accept being anything else. So, I hope they might become everything they long to be on Earth ("we've come to a decision"?), finally free from fear, guilt and pain, so that they can simply love openly, safely, in peace 💞

“To have faith requires courage, the ability to take a risk, the readiness even to accept pain and disappointment. (...) To be loved, and to love, need courage, the courage to judge certain values as of ultimate concern — and to take the jump and to stake everything on these values.”

[ineffable-suffering]

The meaning of "I forgive you"

Alright, hello again, I involuntarily dipped for a bit because real life outside of this lovely Tumblr Good Omens bubble got a little bit stressful, but! I'm back for a quick little post to say that I'm currently reading the script book for Season 1 and seeing this line again, spelled out on paper, just shone some more light on the whole „I forgive you“-scene of Season 2 for me again.

Because really, this first time Az says it to Crowley in front of the bookshop tells us exactly what the second time during the Final Fifteen means.

Aziraphale is not forgiving Crowley for kissing him. Or for using this moment to confess and make things explicit between them.

No, Aziraphale is forgiving Crowley for not trusting and believing (in) him.

Let's shove the Final Fifteen to the side for a second and look at this scene from Season 1 under the cut.

The situation at hand: The World is ending, with utmost certainty. In addition, Crowley is absolutely f*cked and Hell is out to get him. He tries to apologise for their Bandstand fallout and explain the other two things to Az (poorly, but he tries). Because to Crowley, Armageddon is a done deal already. Wherever the actual Antichrist is, he's gonna come into his power and the World will be wiped out for Heaven and Hell to wage their war on. Also, Hastur is coming to kick his demon ass. Time to dip!

And yet, Aziraphale doesn't want to come with him. He is adamant that he will be able to reach the Almighty, talk to Her and turn this around. Because if Aziraphale, Guardian of the Eastern Gate, thinks there's even the slightest, tiniest morsel of a chance that he can turn things around the right way, he will do it. Even if it sounds ridiculous. Even if it's a lost cause to everyone else. Even if all the other angels gang up on him and (literally) beat him up.

Even if Crowley calls him stupid.

Aziraphale decides not to be offended by this.

Because this is what he does. This is what a Guardian does. He stays and protects to ward off the intrusion, until the very last second.

Now listen, I'm the last person to blame Crowley for intrinsically wanting to choose Flight over Fight in this very situation, because Lord knows (literally) what happened to him back when he chose Fight and lost.

But at the same time we have to keep in mind that despite his last name, Aziraphale never Fell. He never made the horrible experience of being chucked away by the one who made you to love Her because you chose to question her ways. And yes, in so many ways this choice of his, to still believe that he can change something by questioning and suggesting (both here and in S2), is utterly maddening and hurtful to Crowley. Because it's a mirror of what Crowley himself did and a reminder of just how big the price he had to pay was. Aziraphale seemingly not realizing or understanding this stings. It does.

And yet.

Yet Aziraphale's choice to not take no for an answer, to not let a punch to the gut derail him from his plan, to not let even the most definitive thing such as Armageddon keep him from fighting back, is the one thing that ends up saving the World.

Because even when it all seems impossible and completely hopeless and bloody Satan himself is erupting from the pits of Hell, ...

... Aziraphale picks up his sword and fights back.

And he wins.

Not without help, of course. But might I remind you of what got Crowley to cooperate and not simply surrender like he'd almost done that second?

You might not see it at first, but tucked in between all the posh hedonism, hidden away underneath that tightly buttoned waistcoat of his, Aziraphale is a fighter. And a good one at that. I mean, for Someone's sake, he got discorporated, beamed himself down back to Earth, found Crowley somehow, possessed a psychic prostitute (love you, Madame Tracy), rode a scooter all the way to Taddfield and fought off Lucifer with sheer willpower (and a bit of emotional coercion).

Aziraphale can fight. Smart and hard. And not only that: He can win, too. And he knows it. Because he believes, truly, firmly and wholly, that he can make things right. It's the only thing he will settle for. This, ladies and gents, this is how he ends up saving the World, together with Crowley, Adam and the rest.

Because he didn't accept no as an answer. He didn't look at the impossible and accept it as such. Even when Crowley thought him to be an idiot for trying and even after his initial attempt at talking to God had failed, Aziraphale still found a way to stop The Big Bad Thing from happening.

Which is exactly what his plan is when he ends up being forced to come back to Heaven by the Metatron. (If you still believe this was a voluntary choice, read here). And which is exactly why he is so hurt and still ends up forgiving Crowley for the fact that Crowley doesn't end up coming with him. Doesn't end up understanding, trusting and believing (in) him, just like all the way back at the end of the World in Season 1.

Aziraphale decides not to be offended by this.

[anneangel]

Is Aziracrow Canon?

The weirdest thing is that at the end of the book/and Show S1, we know that Adam has changed elements of reality (there are books in Aziraphale's bookshop that weren't there before, for example), so it seems like Adam has rearranged some things differently. Before the nightingale sings, we are told:

“They went to the Ritz again, where a table was mysteriously vacant. And perhaps the recent exertions had had some fallout in the nature of reality because, while they were eating, for the first time ever, a nightingale sang in Berkeley Square…”.

That is, it could be that Adam, upon seeing Crowley and Aziraphale, rearranged the universe so that something more romantic could blossom more evidently between Crowley and Aziraphale. But this cannot in any way be used to say that they were not in love before, since Adam looked deeply at both of them, back at the air base, and Crowley thought:

“Adam turned and appeared to notice them for the first time. Crowley was not used to people identifying him so readily, but Adam stared at him as though Crowley's entire life history was pasted inside the back of his skull and he, Adam, was reading it. For an instant he knew real terror. He'd always thought the sort he'd felt before was the genuine article, but that was mere abject fear beside this new sensation. Those Below could make you cease to exist by, well, hurting you in unbearable amounts, but this boy could not only make you cease to exist merely by thinking about it, but probably could arrange matters so that you never had existed at all”.

And, then, Adam said to Crowley and Aziraphale too: “"I don't think you need to go worryin'," said Adam gnomically. "I know all about you two. Don't you worry".”

It is also impossible to say that A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square is not an implicit/subtext reference to Aziraphale and Crowley's relationship, since the lyrics make very precise references to elements of the book/show, so it is to be assumed that the song was placed in Aziraphale and Crowley final arc, on book, specifically, and also on purpose.

The show uses the same principle; in the series, the song "Bicycle Race" plays very literally when they run over Anathema, as well as playing "I'm In Love With My Car" very literally in relation to Crowley and his car, so I must assume that it was also literal when they played "You're My Best Friend" when Crowley was going to Aziraphale's bookshop (p.s; this song was written by Queen's bassist, John Deacon, for his best friend, better known as HIS WIFE).

Aside from another curious fact, there is a correlation between the couples in this plot; Anathema & Newt, Tracy & Shadwell, and Crowley & Aziraphale, they all have something in common:

(1) Each of them has their own arcs to finish their plots;

(2) their arc is closed in duos, they are considered as couples and their arcs are closed together ("Anathema & Newt", "Crowley & Aziraphale", and "Tracy & Shadwell", respectively according to the final arcs in the book);

(3) they all had everything to hate each other, Anathema was a witch, and Newt was a witchhunter (apart from the fact that his ancestor killed her ancestor), Shadwell cursed Tracy all time, and called her a Jezebel (as if it were the most unlikely thing for someone like him not to repudiate someone like her), as well as Crowley is a demon and Aziraphale is an angel (which should make them enemies), but in the end all these characters end up together and on good terms;

(4) They all end the plot as a couple, although it seems that with Anathema and Newt and Shadwell and Tracy this is more explicit, while with Crowley and Aziraphale, it is more implicit (So you see, the exposition of Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship using the plot of other couples to show the parallels didn't start in the second season through Maggie and Nina, but this has already been noticeable since the book);

(5) If you stop to think about it for a moment, even Adam's final arc (which is the last arc of the book) is a love story, but here it's a story of his love in relation to the world he lives in and how much he's willing to appreciate it.

It is also important to remember that, although I am equating Crowley and Aziraphale with the other humans in this plot, we should not take this too seriously because they are, in fact, mythical creatures (occult/ethereal) and not really human.

They can mimetically simulate some human behaviors (like breathing, the book emphasizes several times that they don't even need to do that, but they do it anyway), so they simulate human behavior when they want to, but that doesn't mean they do it completely (for example, Az can eat, but never needs to use the bathroom, both can drink, but don't detox the same way we do, Crowley can sleep, but for an extensively longer period of time than a human being). The point is, they can adopt some human behavior, but they will adapt it to their own way and preferences.

So we could say that they are a couple, but is not the same as we do as "couple” as human, they are a couple whatever that means to them and how they adapt that to their way of existing.

This is why humans mistake them as a couple at various points in the book (Shadwell and Anathema, for example), but the truth is that humans translate Aziracrow relationship into human aspects, the behavior they exhibit within the human aspect is similar to that of what we call a “couple”, that’s why they seem like a couple for us. But, for real, whatever they are to themselves, it is, in fact, ineffable. Although this is, undoubtedly, a love story.

[dalliancekay]

Aziraphale and Manipulation

I want to address a couple of things re: manipulation

Aziraphale is naïve and gullible and easily fooled

Aziraphale is a manipulative asshole who doesn't take no for an answer

Metatron

Points 1 and 2

Funny how both of these seem to be true at the same time for people who dislike Aziraphale or think that Crowley should never be challenged or disagreed with or teased, even though in canon, he literally says or acts in ways that prove he absolutely loves his unpredictable spouse who makes him laugh and react and act in unexpected ways.

Which also points to the strange discrepancy in how fanon Crowley is incredibly powerful, having had created the entire Universe AND brought a human back to life (neither of which is true btw) and also weak cos he gives in to his partner against his will (I know this is not how manipulation of that kind works, but I also don't think people who accuse A/C of this unhealthy dynamic understand our couple so it's just a stupid comparison because Aziraphale knows exactly when to back down from teasing his love, much like he did with the car colour to calm Crowley's agitation).

I am not going to address these points at any length anyway, because I think they are, frankly stupid. I am just pointing out that people who make Aziraphale a villain can make him a villain in any way they wish, even if the points are on opposite scales and both untrue.

And just so you know, Crowley would hate you for this. Crowley adores the angel because Aziraphale is constantly challenging him, surprising him and bringing his best self out. Because Aziraphale is silly and kind and believes in the best of everyone and thinks being good is a superpower.

Point 3

I feel like my manipulative and your manipulative might be different manipulatives in the fandom. Especially when it comes to Final 15.

For me, Metatron being manipulative means him not saying things straight, not saying what he really means, because such things as he wants and plans are not really 'good' good, if you see what I mean. And we can't have that for Heaven. After all, we aren't killing Job's kids... we are just ... not stopping Hell from killing them - Gabriel learned from the best. When Metatron decided on running circles around Aziraphale and has carefully chosen his words ("Now if you wanted to work with him again, that might be considered irregular..."), he made sure Aziraphale understood that the 'offer' was actually a way out of something far worse that Metatron was not going to stoop down to name (or perhaps he did but we didn't see it).

And Aziraphale understood and his heart broke and he started to feel truly terrified (we saw it in real time - just compare the above gif with the below one when Furfur too, threatened Crowley

And then poor Aziraphale tried to go on and explain all this to Crowley while not knowing how and suspecting he will be closely monitored while doing so.

Now. Anyone who thinks Aziraphale would want to make Crowley an angel to make him HAPPIER has completely misunderstood both Aziraphale and imo, Good Omens too.

Crowley was happy when we met him before time in S2 because he was innocent and fully himself (3/4 goofy, 1/4 part self-centred). This is not something Aziraphale could achieve (even if wanted to - but why would he?) by making him an angel again. And he's definitely not stupid to think this would happen. It might have happened if they took Crowley's memories perhaps. And he'd be back to his young self. Like Gabriel/Jim. And if you think Aziraphale would agree (or like!) that, you are insane.

This:

is a threat. Letting Aziraphale know that him going to Heaven (and Crowley agreeing to one more drastic change on top of going there) is the only way they could perhaps work together again. Staying, was never an option. And I don't actually care if that's something that can be done and/or whether Metatron would have followed through if Crowley by some miracle had said yes.

Because Metatron clearly expected Crowley will say no (I also suspect he had good reasons to expect this, perhaps some that Aziraphale doesn't know of), and I bet Aziraphale knew in his heart of hearts that Crowley would never agree either. Perhaps he didn't even want him to agree. He wouldn't want Crowley to be unhappy. But then, he was going to end up unhappy anyway, was he not? They both were. There was no other way. So if Aziraphale allowed himself a bit of hope that they could be together still, who are we to blame and judge him for it? (No, don't answer that.) He must have thought this is forever. That they are parting forever.

But for some people, it seems to me, Metatron being manipulative means that Metatron pulled on some of Aziraphale's 'strings' and blinded him to make him come to Heaven against reason/common sense/better options/forever and ever with his love.

Whether it's his trust that Heaven can be made good - Aziraphale is many things, but he is not vain, he could not possibly think he can fix Heaven by himself like some incarnation of Melon Tusk. Try? Perhaps. With Crowley? Maybe. But in current situation? He did not believe that.

or perhaps Aziraphale missed Heaven? Missed being part of the Plan? Missed God? Wanted to get back on it? Like the poor little lost sheep he is? Please. The angel pursed his lips and looked over his shoulder when Crowley was happily switching on stars in his Nebula, talking of suggestion boxes. Aziraphale knew Heaven was far from perfect or benevolent or merciful or even understanding, long before Crowley.

So no, Aziraphale wasn't led like some puppet on a string, fed a few lies, gotten a few bits of praise and forgotten everything he ever thought or knew. Do you think Aziraphale is so stupid he didn't see Metatron wanted him to come to Heaven without making a fuss? He didn't need to see (what Crowley saw in Heaven) to understand he was being made to come quietly. And perhaps Aziraphale understood too, that coming without cuffs and with his memories intact will give him whatever little leverage he can get.

Metatron also knew giving the wayward angel in front of him any spare moment could end up in disaster, because that exact thing happened before.

What was Aziraphale supposed to do if Metatron didn't take a no (a several of them in fact) for an answer? Metatron is the Voice of God, apparently the highest being after God. Was Aziraphale to ignore Metatron? Go back to the bookshop and lock the door?

What would have happened? Metatron would throw his arms up and go - oh well, I guess I'll leave them to their Armageddon averting, huge miracle making partnership where they can easily fool and blind both Heaven and Hell combined with barely any effort. No reason I should worry.

But he should worry.

Because Aziraphale fooled Hell easily once

And he can do it with Heaven too

And he will.

[aziraphales-library]

Hi! I was wondering if you could recommend any good fics with some sort of language barrier/difference in language between Az and Crowley. I just recently read Buried Treasure by InfeffableToreshi and I really liked it, would love those kinda vibes if you can find it in other fics. I also read an Omegaverse royalty fic where Az pretends he can’t speak Crowleys language, not a huge fan of omegaverse but smth like that would be good too. Longer works would be preferred but anything works. Thanks!

Hello! I haven't read the fic you mentioned, so am unsure of the vibes, but here are some fics featuring language/communication differences...

Food is Love by Sodium_Azide (T)

A chance childhood meeting leads to a lifetime sharing languages, hijinks, and meals together. Aziraphale and Anthony reach across cultures and nourish each others’ hearts and souls.

Scientific Discovery by SeasNStars (T)

Aziraphale had just departed on a two-month-long research study to a secluded island. He ends up encountering a creature of only myth and legend, a marvel to science to be sure.

Across Tides and Currents by doorwaytoparadise, Sodium_Azide (T)

A modern fantasy AU, featuring an inauspicious first meeting, inter-species romance, and meeting in the middle. Aziraphale lives a quiet life on the New England coastline, enduring the bad weather and gathering marine data for the local universities. During the worst storm of the worst hurricane season he can remember, something washes up on shore. "He looked back towards the ocean as the lightning flashed again. There. On the shoreline, rocking in the storm swell. Oh God no."

A Quiet Place by NightValeian (T)

Once upon a time, a silent angel and an outspoken demon met on a wall. Over time, they manage to find some common ground.

Dismantled by Asking_for_a_Fiend (M)

"But calling you by the SKU is really derogatory.” Disgust once again settles on the man’s expressive face. “A-zero-F-L. Eizero-F-L. Eizirofel. Aziraphale?” The handler’s face lights up. “Hey, d’you know there’s an angel called Aziraphale? Aziraphale. What do you think?” The griffin hums, testing the name in his mind. “Not that bad. I’ll think about it.” *** Aziraphale is a griffin raised in a human world, without any contact with others of his own specie, but not really craving it, either. But there's this one handler at the sanctuary, determined to teach him how to be a griffin. Aziraphale is not sure if he shares the ambition, still, the handler himself may be worth giving this a try.

Pitch Black, Pale Blue by enbeeemcee (M)

Crowley's about at the end of his rope. His internship is nothing more than washing all the equipment used by the interns who actually do real scientific research and his boss hates him. His friends either urge him to keep at it or encourage him to drink and forget. Neither of which are particularly helpful. Then, one night, he finds something on the beach.

And the one you mentioned...

Buried Treasure by IneffableToreshi (E)

Aziraphale Fell and his small team are working hard to uncover a mystery that has been discovered deep in the desert in a region with no known history of habitation... ...and they are having very little luck coming up with anything other than stone brick upon stone brick. But as their sponsorships are dwindling and Aziraphale's hopes for the project are beginning to well and truly die, he literally falls right into the site's secret, and discovers something much, much more important than he could have ever imagined.

- Mod D

[possumdnp]

I've had such a fun year being a part of the phandom and wanted to make a compilation of my favorite moments of 2024 to celebrate the end of this wild year! <3

5. October 19th and the two weeks following it

These two weeks were So Much. October 19th was amazing, of course. I loved seeing everyone's gorgeous gifs, edits, and artwork while we waited anxiously for Dan and Phil to show signs of life (and they delivered by actually making the silly "no, but seriously imagine it" video).

And then they gave us the best two weeks ever? We got Spooky Week, and the Halloween mug cakes video, and them dressing up as Aziraphale and Crowley for Halloween! We got the west coast US tour photodump! Phil posted a picture of himself reflected in Dan's PVC-covered ass?? And to top it all off, a video of Phil set to 'Married Life' from Up?!

Those few weeks were legitimately some of the most memorable times I've ever had in phandom :')

4. The birthday livestreams

I'm so happy I was able to attend both birthday streams live because they were so much fun. Phil's was unhinged chaotic energy with all of the technical glitches, and Dan's livestream was just plain unhinged. We got so many good moments from these livestreams: eyebrow slits, the annual cake and Dan photos reveals, appearances by Sister Daniel and Father Philip, and Dan getting his Dune popcorn bucket!! Also, the "imagine that on top of you" kakuna moment lives rent free in my brain to this day. (Most importantly, they raised so much money for charity!)

3. Phlonde

What can I say? Phlonde Phil completely changed the timeline. (inserting a bonus photo of "yeehaw odyssey" Phil here because this look also changed me as a person)

2. Their couple's holiday photodump?!

Something in my brain broke the day they posted these photos. Like, what the fuck, they're actually just posting fully couple-y pictures like this now?! They posted these during the middle of my workday, and I remember just staring at them (and getting absolutely nothing done for the rest of the day).

1. Getting to see DnP live!

Seeing Dan and Phil live at TIT was legitimately one of the best things I did all year. Standing in the lobby before the preshow to swap photocards and bracelets, and just getting to chat with other phannies in real life was so much fun.

And of course, seeing Dan and Phil in person! They walked through the lobby before the preshow literally five feet away from where I was standing, and I'll always remember that stunned excitement I felt seeing them right up close for the first time. Like, they're actually real (and very tall!) :')

The preshow was so much fun (I’m somewhere in that picture above <3), and TIT itself was incredible. It was just one of the best nights of my life. <3

[ineffably-human]

Hot take that has kind of ruined the post-s2 Good Omens discourse for me: if I were Aziraphale - that is, if I were me in an Aziraphale suit, far less angelically goodhearted and forgiving than Aziraphale is, I'd be furious at Crowley.

Whether I had the right of it or not, whether I was being naive about the results or not: if I told the person I loved that I had an opportunity to do something I felt was good and important, that could make a real difference, and they threw it back in my face as a kind of personal failing of mine that I cared in the first place, I would feel betrayed.

(Doubly so if this was something ingrained in the very fabric of my identity. Being an angel literally, inescapably is that for Aziraphale.)

If I begged them to come with me and help and they not only refused (which they of course have every right to do), but launched into a speech about how much they wanted to spend forever with me - and that's why I had to abandon this thing I care about right now and run away with them away from all our problems (that were very much not going to leave us alone), I would start to wonder if their love was actually much more conditional than I'd originally believed.

If they'd then all but stated we were done, something I'd never said and clearly never expected to hear, I'd feel abandoned.

If they chose that moment to push our relationship to a new level, either to force me to change my mind or to show me just what we could have had if I'd not made (what I felt was) a necessary decision, I'd feel manipulated. I'd feel as if everything we'd been through was just weaponized against me and thrown back in my face.

If I found out later that my partner had crucial information they were withholding from me, with no signs they were going to give me that information or use it to help me (including going with me to a place they might have been able to better protect me), I'd wonder how we got this far.

And the idea that I would be the one to apologize after any of that would drive me straight into a second breakup.

The real life version of most of these things, actually, would be huge relationship red flags.

If that's a very one-sided, uncharitable reading of things - yeah, it's also how three quarters of the fandom sounds a lot of the time. So really, it's a good thing I'm not Aziraphale.

[mwagneto]

legit shaking crying i can't believe they're gay for real like they're gay for REAL like after all these years they're literally gay canonically like they kissed on screen on the mouth coz they're gay. like that really happened and there's no taking it back they're canonically gay in that scene and in every other scene also. when they're hanging out they're doing it gayly. when they're calling each other up they're doing it gayly. when they dress like that and act like that it's coz they're gay when crowley's trying to get aziraphale to run away with him it's coz he's in gay love and when aziraphale continuously puts himself in situations where crowley can feel useful it's coz he's in gay love literally everything they do is coz of gay love!!!!!! and that's mine forever!!!!!!!!! after i waited like half my life for it!!!!!!!!!!! oh my fucking god!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[youryurigoddess]

A nightingale sang in the London Blitz

When exactly was that certain night, the night Aziraphale and Crowley met — and spoke for the first time in 79 years in the midst of the London Blitz?

And what’s the deal with the nightingale’s song, really?

Grab something to drink and we’ll look for some Clues below.

The night they met

The Blitz, short for Blitzkrieg (literally: flash war) was a German aerial bombing campaign on British cities in the WW2, spanning between 7 September 1940 and 10 May 1941. The Luftwaffe attacks were carried out almost non stop, with great intensity meant to force a capitulation and similarly strong impact on British life and culture at the time.

Starting on 7 September 1940, London as the capital city was bombed for nearly 60 consecutive nights. More than one million London houses were destroyed or damaged, and more than 20,000 civilians were killed, half of the total victims of this campaign.

The night of 29 December 1940 saw the most ferocity, becoming what is now known as the Second Great Fire of London. The opening shot of the S2 1941 minisode is a direct reference to recordings of that event, with the miraculously saved St Paul’s Cathedral in the upper left corner.

The actual raid lasted between 06:15 and 09:45 PM, but its aftermath continued for days. The old and dense architecture of this particular part of the city turned into a flaming inferno larger than the Great Fire of 1666. Multiple buildings, including churches, were destroyed in just one night by over 100,000 bombs.

Incendiary bombs fell also on St Dunstan-in-the-East church that night, the real-life location of this scene as intended by Neil. It was gutted and again claimed by fire in one of the last air rides on 10 May, when the bomb destroyed the nave and roof and blew out the stained glass windows. The ruins survived to this day as a memorial park to the Blitz.

Such a delightfully Crowley thing to do: saving a bag of books with a demonic miracle adding to the biggest catastrophe for the publishing and book trade in years. 5 million volumes were lost, multiple bookshops and publishing houses destroyed in the December 29th raid alone.

Even without this context, judging by the seemingly unending night, overwhelming cold and darkness, broken heating at the theatre, and seasonal clothing (like Aziraphale and Crowley’s extremely nice winter coats), it’s rather clear that it was the very beginning of the year 1941.

Everything suggests that Aziraphale and Crowley’s Blitz reunion happened exactly 1900 years after their meeting in Rome — which, according to the script book, took place between 1 and 24 January 41 (Crowley was right: emperor Caligula was a mad tyrant and didn't need any additional tempting; there's a reason why he was murdered by his closest advisors, including members of his Praetorian Guard, on 24 January 41).

Interestingly, both events involved a role reversal in their otherwise stable dynamic, with Aziraphale spontaneously taking the lead instead of letting the demon be the one to do all the tempting and saving, and ended with a toast.

The S2 Easter Egg with the nuns of the Chattering Order of St Beryl playing table tennis at the theatre suggests that the Blitz meeting happened on a Tuesday afternoon, which doesn’t match any of the above mentioned days, but sets the in-universe date for 7 January 1941 or later.

The Chattering Order of Saint Beryl is under a vow to emulate Saint Beryl at all times, except on Tuesday afternoons, for half an hour, when the nuns are permitted to shut up, and, if they wish, to play table tennis.

The nightingale

January means one thing: absolutely no migratory birds in Europe yet. They’re blissfully wintering in the warm sun of Northern Africa at the time. But, ironically, when the real nightingales flew off, a certain song about them suddenly gained popularity in the West End of London.

It might be a shock, but A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square wasn’t a hit from the start — even though its creators, Eric Maschwitz and Manning Sherwin, were certainly established in their work at this point. The song was written in the then-small French fishing village of Le Lavandou shortly before the outbreak of the Second World War with first performance in the summer of 1939 in a local bar, where the melody was played on piano by the composer Manning Sherwin with the help of the resident saxophonist. Maschwitz sang his lyrics while holding a glass of wine, but nobody seemed impressed. It took time and a small miracle to change that.

Next year, the 23-year-old actress Judy Campbell had planned to perform a monologue of Dorothy Parker’s in the upcoming Eric Maschwitz revue „New Faces”. But somehow the script had been mislaid and, much to her horror, replaced with the song A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square. She had never professed to be a singer but even so, she gathered her courage and went out onto the moonlit set dressed in a white ball gown. Her heartfelt rendition of the now evocative ballad captured the audience’s imagination and catapulted her West End career to stardom.

It was precisely 11 April 1940 at the Comedy Theatre in Panton Street and the revue itself proved to be a great success — not only it kept playing two performances nightly through the Blitz, but also returned the next year. And the still operating Comedy Theatre is mere five minutes on foot from the Windmill Theatre, where Aziraphale performed in 1941, and not much longer from his bookshop.

Now, most Good Omens meta analyses focus on Vera Lynn’s version of the song from 5 June 1940, but it didn’t get much attention until autumn, specifically 15 November, when Glenn Miller and his orchestra published another recording. And Glenn Miller himself is a huge point of reference in Good Omens 2.

According to the official commentary the infamous credits scene is establishing Aziraphale and Crowley’s final resolve for the next season using the same narrative device The Glenn Miller Story (1954) does in its most crucial scene. It starts with the tune (and audio in general) totally flat, then adds a piano on one side, and gradually becomes fully multidimensional. The Good Omens credits not only emulate the same sound effect, but bring it to the visual side of the narrative by literally combining the individual perspectives of the two characters together. Even though they’re physically apart, their resolve — and love to each other — brings them even closer than before. Aziraphale smiles not because he’s being brainwashed, but because he knows exactly what to do next.

Some of you might have noticed that Tori Amos’s performance for Good Omens is actually a slightly shortened version of Miller’s recording — much less sorrowful than Vera Lynn’s full lyrics that include i.a. this bridge:

The dawn came stealing up

All gold and blue

To interrupt our rendez-vous

I still remember how you smiled and said

Was that a dream or was it true?

Which is a huge hint when it comes to what we can expect from the main romantic plot line in the Good Omens series. The original song introduces an element of the doubt — it seems like there was no nightingale at all, only the mirage woven by the singer clearly intoxicated with love, much like Aziraphale and Crowley for the length of the last six episodes. Crowley’s comment in the season finale might allude to that interpretation, stating that there are no nightingales — never have been. It was all a dream. But the version we’re working with here is short and sweet, and devoid of that doubt. In the Good Omens universe angels were actually dining at the Ritz, the streets were truly paved with stars (or will be shown as such in the next season), and a nightingale really sang in Berkeley Square, as the omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent narrator, God Herself, had shown us.

All in all, it’s not an accident that the “modern” swing ballad activating Aziraphale’s memory and opening the 1941 minisode is the Moonlight Serenade by Glenn Miller. It’s a track naturally associated with A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square when it comes to music style and the sentiment in the lyrics.

But why the sudden popularity? In the great uncertainty and hardship of the Blitz, A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square provided solace and escapism for listeners, offering a glimpse of hope and love amidst the darkness of war. It became a universal anthem of resilience and a reminder of the power of love transcending difficulties. By January 1941 the whole city knew this tune by heart, including a certain West End aficionado with a cabinet full of theatre programs in his bookshop. Thanks to Maggie’s grandmother, he most probably had a record at hand to play during his spontaneous wine night with Crowley. We can only suspect the details, but it was was mutually established as their song exactly at that time or soon afterwards. Pretty sure we will see a third installment of that minisode for many, many reasons, but especially because of this “several days in 1941” answer by Neil:

The Man Hunt

In 1941 A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square gained even more popularity as the romantic theme of the Fritz Lang’s newest film Man Hunt. The 1939 story by Geoffrey Household first appeared under the title “Rogue Male” as a serial in the Atlantic Monthly Magazine where it received widespread comment, soon becoming a world-wide phenomenon in novel form. Its premise criticizes Britain's pre-war policy of appeasement with Germany, ready to sacrifice its own innocent citizens to the tentative status quo. Sounds a bit like Heaven's politics, right?

Yes, I'm trying to make you watch old movies again — like all the other classics, Man Hunt (1941) is easily available on YouTube and other streaming websites.

The next part will include spoilers, so scroll down to the next picture if you prefer to avoid them.

The plot of the movie seems simple enough: the tall, dark, and handsome Alan Thorndike, who nearly assassinates Hitler, narrowly escapes Germany and back in London continues to evade the Nazi agents sent after him with the help of a young trench-clad “seamstress” named Jerry, bridging the class divide and becoming unlikely friends-partners-romantic interests. It doesn’t end well though.

Jerry's small London apartment serves as a hideout for Alan when he was being followed by Nazis, similarly to how Aziraphale's bookshop is a safe haven for both Crowley and Gabriel in S2. She helps the man navigate the streets and eventually out of London — by sacrificing herself and getting forcefully separated from him by a patrolling policeman. The last time they see each other, Alan watches Jerry look back at him yearningly and disappear in the fog, followed by the elderly officer.

Unfortunately in the next scene we learn that the latter is a Nazi collaborator and helps the agents apprehend Jerry in her own flat. Staying loyal to her love and uncooperative, she’s ultimately thrown out of a window to her death, but posthumously saves Alan once again — through the arrow-shaped hatpin he gifted her earlier that is presented to him as the evidence of her off-screen fate.

Long story short, thanks to Jerry’s sacrifice Alan not only survives, but is able to join the war that broke out in the meantime and go back to Germany, armed with a rifle and a final resolve to end what he started, no matter how long will it take. The justice will be served and the dictator will pay with his life for his sins.

I wouldn’t be myself without mentioning that the main villain has a Roman chariot statue similar to the one in Aziraphale’s bookshop, an antique sculpture of St Sebastian (well-known as the gayest Catholic Saint) foreshadowing his demise, and a chess set symbolizing the titular manhunt/game of tag with the protagonist.

Aziraphale’s song

Will Aziraphale sacrifice himself as well? Or has he already? If his coin magic trick can be any indicator, we should expect at least a shadow of a danger touching the angel’s wings soon.

Let’s sum up the 1941 events from Aziraphale’s perspective: the very first time they’ve interacted after almost a century, Crowley actively sabotaged his entire existence twice by stepping onto a holy ground and by being outed by agents of Hell, both on the very same night and both because of his undying dedication to the angel. That’s enough of a reason not only for performing an apology dance, but also maintaining a careful distance for Crowley’s sake for the next 26 years. Only when he heard that his idiot was planning to rob a church, he gave up since he “can't have him risking his life”.

That’s when Crowley, sitting in a car parked right under his bookshop, offered him a ride. It wasn’t even subtle anymore. It was supposed to be a date, this time both of them understood it. But Aziraphale wouldn’t risk Crowley’s safety for his own happiness, especially not when he can name his feelings towards him and knows that they are reciprocated — the biggest lesson he learnt back in 1941.

So he did what he’s best at, he cut Crowley off again, but this time with a promise of catching up to his speed at some point. Buddy Holly’s Everyday, which was originally planned to play afterwards instead of the Good Omens theme, adds additional context here:

No, thank you. Oh, don’t look so disappointed. Perhaps one day we could... I don't know… Go for a picnic. Dine at the Ritz.

Aziraphale, carefully looking around and feeling observed through the whole conversation in the Bentley, consciously used the “Dine at the Ritz” line from A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square, from their song, as a code only the two of them understand. Not as a suggestion to go out for a meal, but a promise. A hope for the privilege of being openly in love and together — maybe someday, not now, when it’s too dangerous — even if it leads to a bad ending.

Fast forward to 2023 when for one dreadful moment Crowley’s “No nightingales” robbed Aziraphale even of that semblance of hope. He looked away, unable to stop his tears anymore. Only their kiss helped him pull himself together and make sure that a nightingale did sing the last time he turned — just like in their song — this time without a smile, as a goodbye.

[sparrowssally]

*cracks knuckles* Yet another PSA about the Tennant and Sheen families…

Alright, here goes it. I don’t give a fuck if you ship Aziraphale and Crowley. I’m a huge shipper of them myself, so it’s all good! Love them, want the world for them, etc etc. HOWEVER, if you want to:

1. ship David and Michael romantically

2. want to use shipping David and Michael as an excuse to be blatantly misogynistic against their respective partners (Georgia and Anna)

3. want to allege that they are being “trapped” in their marriage by their partners “strategically” having kids

Then get the fuck off my blog. Seriously. There’s no place for you here.

You’re literally hoping that David Tennant, a man with five kids, will leave his wife of 12 years (whom he clearly loves) to end up in a hyper-sexual romantic relationship with Michael Sheen, who would also have to leave his partner as well, with whom he has two young children and who he seems very happy with. You’re literally wanting happy families to get broken apart so that your selfish ship can sail. It’s disgusting and you should be ashamed of yourselves.

I get wanting to have queer representation, it’s greatly needed and there is always room for more of it. However, wanting to assign a queer identity to someone who hasn’t publicly acknowledged that they identify that way is NOT okay. I don’t care who they are, celebrity or not. If you want to see queer representation, then Aziraphale and Crowley are RIGHT THERE. Don’t wreck real people’s relationships with their partners—and their friendship with each other—just because you want your ship to sail. If for some reason David and/or Michael want to come out in the future on their own, then that’s for them to do when they feel comfortable, and speculating about their identities without them saying anything is just weird and gross.

AND ANOTHER THING! All y’all who write essay-long posts analyzing every single social media thing about Michael, David, Georgia, and Anna: y’all need to get a fucking life. Go outside. Touch grass. PLEASE stop treating these very real people like they’re puppets in your grand romance story. I guarantee you that their lives are probably not NEARLY as fascinating and scandal-filled as what you think they are. And believe it or not—because I know y’all LOVE to use this as “evidence”—people are allowed to not be all smiley and lovey-dovey in selfies and photos with their partners, and for many people, teasing their partners is part of their relationship! *gasp* I know right?? Shocking. It literally doesn’t mean anything that Georgia and David tease each other or that Michael and Anna tease each other, and that they all occasionally aren’t smiling in photos with each other. That’s normal person behavior and I’m begging y’all to understand that.

I know this post probably isn’t going to be seen by the weirdo people who need to see it the most, but whatever. I just really needed to get this off my chest.

[armageddidnt]

A Quite Nice and Fairly Accurate List of misconceptions Crowely and Aziraphale probably have about each other because these two idiots are Literally Incapable of Communicating (seasons 1+2)

[Aka I am going insane about their absolute inability to Talk Out Loud With Their Mouths and now you can too]

-Crowley probably thinks Heaven discorporated Aziraphale and burned down his bookshop instead of Shadwell doing it accidentally in 1x4 because Aziraphale never told Crowley what actually happened to him

-Aziraphale probably didn’t realize how upset Crowley was when he thought Aziraphale was gone for good in 1x5 and Aziraphale probably didn’t even realize Crowley was referring to him when Crowley said “I lost my best friend.” This is because it doesn’t seem like Aziraphale could actually see Crowley when he appeared to him in the pub and Crowley never stated this explicitly to Aziraphale

-Aziraphale doesn’t know Gabriel told him to “shut [his] stupid mouth and die already” when he tried to burn ‘Aziraphale’ in hellfire in 1x6 because Crowley never told him

-Aziraphale doesn’t know that Heaven threatened to ‘book-of-life’ anyone who was found helping Gabriel in 2x1 because Crowley never told him. Aziraphale also doesn’t know that this is the only reason Crowely came back to help at the end of the episode because Crowley never told him

-Crowley doesn’t know that Shax implied Crowley was risking destruction by helping Aziraphale in 2x4 because Aziraphale never told him (Aziraphale: “Nothing happened to me. Very uneventful journey indeed, no strange things at all”)

-Aziraphale doesn’t know any of the things Crowley discovered in Heaven in 2x6 because Crowley never told him. This is including but not limited to:

Gabriel decided he didn’t want another Armageddon and was immediately derobed, cast out, and memory wiped because of it, the Metatron decided to enact this punishment, the fact that Heaven is planning another catastrophic end to humanity in the first place, and that Gabriel as the Archangel had basically no real power at all because the moment he disagreed with Heaven he was ejected without a second thought (If Aziraphale had known this, Crowley’s pleas of “when Heaven ends life here on Earth, it’ll be just as dead as if Hell ended it” and “they’re toxic” might not have fallen on deaf ears)

-Bonus: not really a miscommunication but Aziraphale didn’t see that Look the Metatron gave Crowley when they were leaving the bookshop to go to Nina’s in 2x6 so Aziraphale probably has no idea how the Metatron/Heaven really feels about Crowley (and by extension, whether the Metatron’s offer to “restore” Crowley back to an angel was genuine)

[ineffable-suffering]

Re: "You go too fast for me, Crowley", because I think I finally figured out the real meaning behind that line

Naturally, this line of all lines, the most line of them all, is constantly circling around my rotten brain like a moth around a flame.

In addition, though, there's always been another Good Omen's line/exchange that has kept bothering me again lately. And literally until just about five minutes ago, I had never thought of relating them back to each other.

Now, five minutes later, I have and I think I just ... figured it out.

In case you were wondering: The second line that wouldn't leave my head is what Aziraphale says to Crowley during their clandestine meeting at St. James' Park in 1862 when Crowley asks him for Holy Water:

A: "I'm not bringing you a suicide pill, Crowley!"

And here's what bugs me about this: Why did Aziraphale, without a breath of hesitation, immediately assume Crowley wanted the Holy Water to commit suicide if things ever went wrong?

That's ... such a dark assumption to make. Especially because that is absolutely not what Crowley wanted it for, as he literally says himself:

C: "That's not what I want it for, just insurance."

And what does Aziraphale reply?

A: "I'm not an idiot, Crowley!"

Because he firmly, firmly believes that Crowley is asking him to bring him the Holy Water as a foolproof method of taking his own life in case Heaven and Hell ever find out about them.

To this day, that conversation gives me chills whenever I think about it. We so rarely get see what genuine emotions and thoughts for and about Crowley Aziraphale keeps neatly tucked away behind that tightly buttoned waistcoat of his. This moment in 1862 is one of the very rare ones where his façade slips a little – and the peak we get isn't a fun one. It's a very dark, scared and vulnerable one.

What am I on about and how does this all relate to the infamous "You go too fast for me, Crowley"-line? Let's look at it under the cut.

(Word count: 2560 | Reading time: ~10 min. | TW: mentions of suicide)

Like I mentioned up above, it always struck me to my core that Aziraphale very clearly immediately assumes Crowley wants the Holy Water for possible suicide. Not only is that a very dark and upsetting thought, it also poses the question: Why? Why is that the first place Aziraphale's mind goes to?

Crowley says at the very beginning of their conversation:

C: "We have a lot in common, you and me."

He's definitely referring to their (very mutual) relationship Arrangement and the fact that they both find themselves kept apart and watched by their respective head offices, not allowing them to ever misstep and give themselves away.

After bickering around a little like they do, Crowley asks his favour – and he makes it very clear in a quiet and serious voice that:

C: "This is something else. [...] For if it all goes wrong."

He's not just talking about Heaven or Hell finding out about some silly frivolous miracles, no. He's talking about them finding out about their Arrangement, their relationship. The worst of all worst case scenarios.

So bad, in fact, that he doesn't even ask his favour out loud but instead decided to write it down.

Aziraphale's reaction is ... severe.

We immediately see his face drop as, he too, realizes that this is all of a sudden a very serious conversation indeed. And he immediately and vigorously denies Crowley's request because he thinks it to be one for a suicide pill.

To understand how he could arrive at that lightning-quick (and also wrong) conclusion, we have to try and understand how Aziraphale sees Crowley and the threat that the angel himself as well as their relationship poses to Crowley.

Crowley can, at times, be a very self-deprecating and cynical character. He's without a doubt carrying a lot of trauma and unspoken fears and emotions with him at all times. Aziraphale at this point in their relationship probably has a good notion of what those are – but he doesn't know the whole depth of it because they've never been able to speak freely enough and Crowley has seemingly decided to keep many-a things to himself, still. They both tread the waters of plausible deniability very well.

So, to jump to the conclusion of Crowley entertaining suicidal thoughts in the face of unavoidable danger is ... quite a violent jump. And remember: "[...] underneath it all, Crowley was an optimist. If there was one rock-hard certainty that had sustained him through the bad times then it was utter surety that the universe would look after him."

So, what is it that Aziraphale does know that would drive him to such a drastic conclusion when, in reality, secret optimist Crowley only ever wanted the Holy Water to protect himself against Hell to come out safe on the other end of things?

2500 BC, Land of Uz: A: "That [going along with Heaven/Hell as far as you can] sounds, um ..." C: "Lonely? Yeah." A: "But you said it wasn‘t." C: "I‘m a demon. I lied."

After Crowley helps Aziraphale out in Edinburgh in 1827, Crowley is immediately sucked back down to Hell We don't know what exactly happened after that or just how long Crowley was gone. We also don't know if Crowley ever told Aziraphale what happened, once he returned. What we and Aziraphale do know, is that Crowley ends up asking him for Holy Water, out of the blue, only a couple of decades later.

1601, The Globe: A: "But if Hell finds out [about the Arrangement], they won't just be angry. They'll destroy you." (additionally, later in time, C: "My lot does not send rude notes.")

Ergo: It's very clear that Aziraphale seems to have put two and two together with his own angel math by what he has a) witnessed himself and b) what Crowley has said himself which equals: In going against Hell, Crowley has felt incredibly lonely before he had Aziraphale by his side and if Heaven and Hell were to ever find out about them, Hell's punishment would be a whole lot worse than Heaven's.

He thinks Hell would destroy Crowley.

So when Crowley, who so rarely says how he really feels and one of the few times he did, told Aziraphale he was lonely, says he wants the Holy Water, the immediate conclusion Aziraphale comes to is: He wants it as an emergency exit. In case things go pear-shaped. He wants it to escape whatever dreadful punishment Hell would have in stock for such a lonely traitor. He wants it as a suicide pill.

For Aziraphale to not even entertain the thought or believe that Crowley does indeed only want the Holy Water as a means of self-defense is, again, absolutely heartbreaking. Because it tells us a thing or two just how scared and desperate Aziraphale thinks Crowley to be. Something along the lines of: "If I myself am already so immensely terrified of Hell's punishment for Crowley, how terrified must Crowley be."

I think a whole lot of this is also very, very strong projection and shows us how Aziraphale himself feels about all of it. How scared he is for himself and Crowley. Of what would be done to them.

A: „Out of the question! Do you know what trouble I'd be in if they knew I‘d been ... fraternizing?“

He knows they would both suffer immense consequences and that Crowley‘s still would be worse. If anything, in a dark and twisted way, it shows that Aziraphale himself has definitely entertained the idea of suicide as a concept, at least. Maybe not for himself or Crowley, yet, but remember, he‘s awfully fond of Shakespeare‘s Hamlet.

A: „To be or not to be? Buck up, Hamlet!“

Yeah, buck up indeed. (By the way, there's a great meta by @greenthena on why Aziraphale likes Hamlet so much that kind of plays into my point a little. You can read it here).

And again, who knows what Aziraphale might have actually witnessed of Hell's cruel ways already in the past (Edinburgh of 1827, or at other times) that made him arrive at the conclusion that, ultimately, suicide would be the less painful choice for Crowley when faced with Hell's consequence for their relationship.

I told you this was gonna take a bit of a darker turn. So, here we are. At the turn. It doesn't get much lighter from here on out, I'm afraid.

Because all of this gives "You go too fast for me, Crowley" a whole new devastating meaning.

Personally, I always found it a teensy bit difficult to relate that line back to Aziraphale implying that Crowley was trying to push their relationship a little too fast for him.

Deducing that as the meaning of "You goo to fast for me" after we were shown in the montage of S1E3 that Aziraphale, from circa 1941 on, was undoubtedly fully aware of just how madly in love he was with Crowley, has always felt odd to me. And it continued to feel even odder after we got the whole story of 1941 in S2.

Because if that minisode showed us anything, it's that if you let Aziraphale take over the metaphorical wheel for about five minutes, "too fast" doesn't even match the astronomical speed with which he crashes head first into 15th base. Forget the hand holding and kissing, let's go straight to you shooting me on the first date I planned for us!

And they say romance is dead.

Now look, of course, Aziraphale is still keeping most of his romantic feelings and longing bottled up out of fear that Heaven and Hell could find out about them and have Crowley destroyed. We've established that this very big fear of his is the driving factor behind him never trying to overstep that invisible line.

But still, those feelings? They're there. Oh, Hell, they are t-h-e-r-e.

Our angel is a master of self-delusion but not even he is holy enough to deny the fact that, if he could, he'd want nothing more than to lock that demon down and elope together into their happily-ever-after.

So, when Aziraphale finally budges and hands over the Holy Water to Crowley in 1967, I've always had a hard time believing that that line coming from Mr. "I guess there's something to be said for shades of grey" himself actually meant: "I'm not ready yet, you want to go faster than I do."

Because really, apart from trying to convince Aziraphale of the Arrangement and rescuing him from every silly, coincidental predicament the angel has gotten himself into over the millennia, what exactly is it that Crowley did here to "go too fast"? Hell, he's been at it at the pace of a snail ever since, very well knowing that Aziraphale would take a lot of gentle nudging and lunch temptations invitations to agree with the Arrangement.

All Crowley does in that moment in the car is offer Aziraphale a lift, anywhere he wants to go. And yes, that is code their little dance, that is how he shows his love for Aziraphale. But Aziraphale has never before deemed that an issue or seen it as a too-fast progression of their relationship. He even suggests another date himself two seconds later, saying:

A: "Perhaps we could go for a picknick one day. Dine at the Ritz."

So, what, one sentence later he suddenly wants to hit the breaks again? After he literally looked like this the last time Crowley drove (literally way too fast) through burning London?

Nah, I'm not buying it.

Instead, here's what I think Aziraphale really means with this line that changed us all (and I'm sorry, but I'm about to one-up the sadness of the 1862 meeting):

I think Aziraphale is referring to what he thinks is the reason Crowley wants the Holy Water for.

Suicide.

And boy-fucking-howdy, does that change the game.

Because if we assume that Aziraphale, all throughout the one-century-long Holy Water standoff, thought Crowley wanted it as a quick, ahem, Escape From Everything, what I think Aziraphale really means with "You go too fast for me" is this:

To him, Crowley is asking the most cruel deed of him to bring him the one thing that could take Crowley away from Aziraphale for good. For ever. In case things go pear shaped. In case Hell finds out about them and comes after Crowley.

To Aziraphale, Crowley is asking him to load the bullet into his gun for the time it won't be a trick. So he can escape before Hell gets to him.

More devestatingly, I think Aziraphale even understands where that notion comes from. Aziraphale knows how dangerous their relationship is. And Hell does not send rude notes. So, I think after pondering on it for a good millennia, part of him has come to understand why Crowley would want an emergency exit.

Which is absolutely fucking heartbreaking.

Especially because that's not even what Crowley was thinking when he made his request. He truly only wanted it as a defense. But Aziraphale doesn't believe or fully realize that. Aziraphale believes the Holy Water is a suicide pill and to some extent even understands why Crowley might want that.

And yet, despite (wrongly, but well) understanding Crowley's intentions, Aziraphale is still deeply upset and terrified at the thought of Crowley taking his own life should they ever get caught. Which explains his extreme reaction all the way back at their clandestine meeting at St. James' Park.

Aziraphale assuming Crowley's way out of the most pear-shaped situation of them all would be suicide also means that Aziraphale would be the one who'd be ... well, left behind.

He recognises that choosing death over possible eternal punishment is maybe somewhat of an understandable choice. And yet, it's a choice that, to him, Crowley has made without him. Seemingly way before their first talk about it.

Aziraphale thinks Crowley seems to have made up his mind about his escape plan without him in it.

He thinks that if they were caught, Crowley would want some Holy Water around to quickly chug before he would be at Hell's mercy and that would be it.

Crowley would, for the first time ever, really leave. Not just for Alpha Centauri. But actually leave. Escape and run away to a point of no return. For good. Without Aziraphale. To a place where Aziraphale couldn't follow him, no matter how fast he tried to run himself.

It goes a little something like:

"If they found out about us, you would choose to go where I couldn't follow. And you're asking me to pave the road for you to walk there. Without me ever being able to get a say in walking alongside you. You want to go to places where I could never join you. You'd run away without me and I understand why but you didn't even give me a chance to catch up. You go too fast for me, Crowley."

F*ck, man. I think I need to lie down.

Y'know what else that gives new meaning to?

Alright, that's it, I'm out. Enough sad meta-ing for the day. See you all around once I've stopped slipping further into the void, folks. :')