#these were fake candles that run on batteries

[beach-loves-sparkle]

~ Mood lighting ~

[soulreapin]

happy valentine’s day klancers here’s our favorite tragedy getting to be happy for once. xoxo soul

—

Keith wakes up to the sharp, pungent smell of roses in his nose.

That’s not always as alarming as it is right now, sometimes Lance gets flowers from the farmer’s market and sets them in delicate clear vases all over their apartment (Keith will always hate the smell of daffodils), but the farmer’s market hadn’t been in town for a number of weeks.

He sits up in bed, pushing the red flannel comforter down from where it was safely tucked up underneath his chin and looks around wildly. Their comfortable bedroom has a vase of red roses on every surface, even on the vanity tucked in the crook between the wall and the door of their ensuite bathroom.

They look fresh, vibrant and sweet in the low light.

He glances to his side and Lance’s side of the bed is noticeably empty. That should’ve been clue number one that something was up, not the smell of roses, but apparently it hadn’t been long enough since his time in the desert that waking up with his arms wrapped around himself and his knees tucked into the crook of his chin wasn’t considered abnormal yet.

A splay of his palm against the sheets tells him Lance has been up for some time. Something ugly and foreign squeezes itself around his heart, but Keith, under any circumstance, does not give himself time to figure out what it is and slides out of bed, stepping into his red lion slippers and following the apparent trail of red rose petals on their usually pristine wooden floor.

His slippers scuff on the wood as Keith trails down the short hallway into their living room, and if he thought their bedroom was bad, this is catastrophic. Floral arrangements sit large and pretty on their dining table, on their kitchen counters, on the coffee table where instead of fake fruit they set their feet in the middle.

Varying shades of red and pink and white flourish in the home Keith worked so hard to build for him and Lance, the life they hold on to with tight grips and locked elbows decorated with pretty scalloped petals and white lace keeping them all standing at attention.

On the center of their dining room table, where there are pencil marks thoroughly worn into the wood from hours doing homework for Lance to get his masters, are several fake candles set up around a red envelope, and from this distance Keith can’t tell if it’s sealed with wax or not, but he’d bet his braid that it was.

As Keith is walking over to the envelope, he panics. “What did I forget? Our anniversary isn’t until October, his birthday is in July, it’s February—oh. It’s February.”

He reaches the letter at the same time he has the realization. Today is February 14th, it’s Valentine’s Day, and Keith did not forget. There are reservations in his name tonight for their favorite mexican restaurant, the one Lance picked himself because it tasted the most like home, and he’s got a heart-shaped box of chocolates and a hand-written card tucked into the back of their closet because he knows Lance doesn’t look back there.

So he picks up the envelope with steady fingers, pops open the definite wax seal and before he can judge it, presses a kiss to the cold wax with the reminder that Lance’s careful hands had poured and pressed it into a heart shape, and slides a thin, white paper card out of the envelope.

In Lance’s scraggly, all-caps looking handwriting, he’s written, ‘good morning, keithy cat! happy valentines day. i know you freaked this morning when you saw all the flowers. mad i missed it. anyways i didn’t have to go into work like you were thinking. you’re going looking for me but because im SO GRACIOUS and an AMAZING HUSBAND ill give you your first one free, go down to nightsky florals. love, loverboy,’

Despite it all, it brings a small smile to Keith’s face. He folds the note delicately and tucks it back into the envelope, deciding to leave the battery-powered candles running.

“Damn you, Lance,” Keith mutters, but trudges back to their room and changes into simple, loose-fitting Lucky jeans and a red sweater. ‘Tis the season, and all that.

–

A small bell rings over Keith’s head as he pushes the door open to Night Sky florals. Shiro must have installed that after he went off to college, but the rest of the shop was still the same. Wooden bins of flowers sit on racks going all the way up to the ceiling, there are displays in the center with red roses and assorted bouquets on them, and greenery climbs up the sides of the racks and up the counter near the back of the room.

It’s light and homey. Keith spent a lot of time in Night Sky florals, sitting behind the counter and doing his AP Lit homework, staring daggers at To Kill a Mockingbird and scribbling down Quizlet-approved bullshit answers.

Now, Shiro is sitting on a stool behind the counter, assembling a small array of red roses, baby’s breath, and camelias. He looks up and sees Keith standing in the doorway, “Hey, kid!”

“Hi, Shiro,” Keith grumbles, smiling despite himself, skirting around the center displays to get to the counter, “How’ve you been?”

“You were at my house for dinner a week ago.” Shiro stands up and comes out from behind the counter to wrap Keith in a hug that basically breaks every rib in his body and eliminates a need for a chiropractor. “I think you know how I’ve been.”

Keith shrugs in his hold and hugs him back, “I don’t know, it might have changed in the week I haven’t seen you. Forgive me for caring about my brother.”

After a few more bone-crushing seconds, Keith is let go and allowed to expand his lungs to full capacity again. Shiro tosses over his shoulder as he turns away, “Denied. Back to the desert with you, creature.”

“You’re so odd,” Keith shakes his head and picks at a piece of stray fuzz on the sleeve of his sweater, “I was here for something. Lance sent me here. Is there something here for me?”

Shiro’s face lights up and he disappears off into the back. “He stopped by this morning! This is so cute, Keith I almost kind of hate it, I’m so glad you guys are happy together—aha! Found you, fucker.”

“I’m almost a little nervous about it,” he admits, “Like, he’s doing this for me, what if dinner and chocolates and a card isn’t enough?”

Something clatters to the ground in the back and Shiro reappears holding another red envelope with a pressed wax seal and a small, thin piece of paper. “Keith, I promise you, if you got him a pair of socks and a bag of cherry cordial Hershey’s Kisses, he’d love you forever.”

He accepts the letter and the small piece of paper, his face screwed up, “Those are absolutely disgusting, they taste like cough syrup. The peppermint ones are so much better.”

“Cough syrup aside,” Shiro comments, shaking his head like he can’t believe Keith has a correct opinion, “You know what I meant. He’s happy just having you.”

Keith sighs, a little dejectedly, and slides his thumbnail beneath the wax circle.

It reads, ‘congrats, keefers, you made it! this is the place we met for the first time. i bet you remember it. i came in to get funeral flowers for hunks robot and you insulted me various times all while giving me the most beautiful flowers i had ever seen. i thought you were beautiful too with your shitty ponytail and your silly looking apron. you had a pansy tucked into the pocket i think. ‘

“It was a rose.” Keith says, out loud, without even meaning to.

Shiro glances up from his bouquet in progress, “Congratulations?”

“No, um,” Suddenly embarrassed, Keith scratches the back of his neck, “The day I met Lance here, I had a red rose tucked into my apron. He said it was a pansy.”

“Are you blushing?” Shiro exclaims.

“Shut up, Shiro, go back to your flowers. In the time you’ve spent insulting me three more people have either died or gotten engaged and you are holding them back from their floral arrangements,” Keith sasses, looking back down at the letter.

‘whatever it was i thought it was really cute. im glad we ran into each other that day. rip hunk but if his robot hadn’t died i wouldnt have married this beefcake so who really won here (me its me i won). anyways. the little white paper shiro should’ve handed you will give you a little clue as to where to go next. love, lancelot.’

He slides the letter back into the envelope and flips the small paper over. On it are two dragons intertwined, one small and red and the other bigger, black, and missing its right wing. Keith knows this image; this image sits squarely over his spine.

“So, where are you off to next?” Shiro asks casually.

Keith glances up at Shiro, missing his right arm, and offers a small smile. “Ocean Waves Tattoo Parlor.”

“That’s right across the street from us–oh, that’s where Lance used to work when you two met, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, that’s the one. I’d better be off now. I’ll see you for dinner next Wednesday?” Keith starts to move around the store, picking flowers out of bins and collecting them in his right hand.

“Same day, same time,” Shiro confirms, “Adam’s making pasta salad, I think–what are you doing?”

Keith has gathered a full bundle of red roses, pink carnations, greenery, and forget-me-nots. He drops a handful of cash onto the counter that seems like a vague approximation of what the total should be and waves goodbye, hurrying out of the shop before Shiro can throw his money back at him or realize Keith had probably underpaid.

—

After his brief stop at Night Sky Florals, Keith went to two more places. Ocean Wave Tattoo Parlor, where Lance used to work and coincidentally where he got his back piece done in Lance’s chair, the ice cream shop where they went on their first date to receive another letter from Romelle, and even at the library on the other side of town where Keith had dedicated hours of his life to helping Lance review for a final (that he passed with flying colors).

He ends up at Fortune Coffee House, their favorite spot to grab a drink or a muffin and just eat breakfast together before they go their separate ways. Keith had stopped at home first and dug the card and chocolates out from the back of the closet, since he had a feeling he’d be seeing Lance here, as this was supposedly the last location.

The door creaks closed behind Keith as he steps into the warm air of the coffee shop, a floor-to-ceiling shelving unit cordoning off the counter from the rest of the shop. Fortune Coffee House is decorated in warm shades of brown and cream, reminiscent of Keith’s college days.

“Welcome in–Keith Akira Kogane, where have you fucking been?” Pidge yells from behind the counter, pushing her glasses up her nose.

Right. Pidge Holt, Keith and Lance’s oldest shared friend, had ended up with a job at Fortune Coffee House, and Keith had been neglecting going out for a beer with her, Hunk, and Lance. Copyediting kept him busy, what can he say?

He sighs and walks up to the counter, flowers, card, and chocolate all balancing very precariously in the crook of one arm. “Hi, Pidge.”

“Don’t hi, Pidge me, you dirty fucker. I missed you!” If she could, Keith would bet every dime he had that she’d throw her pen at him. “Your hair is longer.”

Automatically, his hand shoots up to fidget with the end of his braid. She’s right, it has gotten a little longer, the tail now dangling over his heart instead of at his collar. “I guess it is. What’s new with you?”

“I got into AST.” She says nonchalantly, looking up at Keith with a devious grin.

“That’s great—holy shit, that’s great!”

AST, or Altea State Tech, was the best college in the entire area if you wanted to work on rockets one day, which Pidge did. Her grin is so bright, it blinds him a little, but he leans over the bar and wraps his free arm around her shoulders in an awkward hug.

“I know, isn’t it?” She gushes. “I start in September in the astronautical engineering program, the one Matt did, it’s going to be so, so great!”

“You’ve gotta tell me everything once you start,” Keith says when he pulls back, shifting all of his items between arms, “Has Lance stopped in today?”

“Basically used an entire giftcard stress-drinking iced green teas. He’s been here since eleven, so not very long.” Pidge snorts and picks up her mug with some silly science joke on it, taking a sip of whatever she’s concocted now. “I think he might’ve worn a hole in the floor. Same table as usual.”

“Oh, great,” an exhale rushes out of Keith’s chest, “Can I get a—”

“No, shut up. On the house.” Pidge points at an admittedly very large sign that says, Coming in with a special someone? Your first drink is on us!

“Well, I tried. Seeya, Pidgie. Have fun at AST.” Before Keith leaves, he drops a five dollar bill into the tip jar and slides between tables to get to the second, library-like room.

Fortune Coffee House had two spaces, the actual coffee bar and a second room with tables, an assortment of armchairs, and couches for studying, worship, or just to chat quietly. Keith slips through the doorframe and sees Lance sitting in his usual armchair, tucked into the alcove created by two windows. An empty plastic cup sits on the low table behind them.

Lance looks just as beautiful as the day Keith met him. His hair is longer and curlier, better taken care of, and freckles make their homes loud and proud across his face, but the Pacific ocean that sloshes around his pupils never changed, nor did the tilt of his smile or the slight scrunch of his nose when he laughed. Keith has kissed that scrunch on several occasions, to no fault of his own.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, blue,” Keith says as he approaches Lance, pressing a kiss to the top of his head, “Got these for you.”

“Keithalicous, Keith, god, you scared me!” Lance exclaims but accepts both the kiss and the gifts he’s handed, running a gentle finger over the rose petals. “Did you get here okay?”

Keith thinks back on all the running around he’s done today and can’t tamp down the laugh. “As okay as I could’ve been. I liked the little game you sent me on. It was nice to go back to St. Taffy’s. Romelle still works there, yaknow?”

“I was just there this morning, goober.” Lance reminds him gently, setting the flowers and the chocolate on the table, working on opening the card. “I’m glad you liked it. I wasn’t sure.”

He remembers what’s written in the card. It was written late at night when Keith couldn’t sleep and instead spent precious minutes watching Lance’s sleeping face shift. “Right, yeah, ‘course, ah, I knew that.”

“Wow, did your code just stop working?” Lance jokes as he finally gets the sealed white envelope open (it was spit-sealed, Keith didn’t fuck with wax,) and pulls out the card.

Keith had found it months ago. It was a deep green and pictured a featureless white deer, standing small amongst towering trees. He found it pretty, and by the way Lance traced a reverent finger over the spiny branches of the trees, he did too.

The card itself wasn't a problem. It was what was written inside the card, or more rather, how much was written inside the card. Keith had used every available inch of space from the top edge of the right side to where the small inscription was on the left.

While Lance reads, Keith pulls at a loose thread in his sweater. It pools in his hand by the time Lance glances up at Keith and slowly folds the card shut. His crystal-clear eyes are glassy and wet with tears.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

“Shut up,” Lance cuts in, “Shut all the way up. You’re such a gifted fucking writer, oh my god. That was beautiful. I love you too, Keithers.”

His hammering chest eases up and is replaced with birdsong and unbridled joy. “I’m glad. Did you…have a favorite part?”

Lance pauses, “Hm. I think it might’ve been ‘The stars could love me and the moon could cry for me, but I’d still choose you. Every time.’ Or ‘You are my north star over the ocean guiding me home and there is nowhere I would rather tilt my chin than up to your light.’ I told you, Keith, you’re a brilliant fucking writer.”

Keith doesn’t respond, but he does reach across and link Lance’s hand up with his. Lance tightens his grip, the gold metal of his rings digging into Keith’s fingers, and pulls Keith forward into a kiss that he wasn’t entirely sure was coffee shop appropriate.

“Can you cut that shit out? People read the Bible in here.” Pidge calls from the doorway.

“Sorry, Pidgie,” Lance says sheepishly, pulling away from Keith, “Thanks for the coffee.”

His mouth tastes like Lance’s strawberry Carmex and green tea. Keith accepts the hot strawberry mocha that’s handed to him and takes a sip, but he’s watching Lance like he’s the only star in the sky.

To Keith, he might as well be. There wasn’t room for much else in Keith’s night sky, anyways.

[ghost-kitty-cat]

Nat's headcanons (that my brain has thought of... enjoy my rambling...)

First Headcanon, Whenever Desmond visits Law, Nat totally makes Law and Desmond play a game where Nat is a princess, Law is a knight and Desmond is a dragon (for obvious reasons) and Law has to "save" princess Nat from the "evil" dragon.. and when Law started dating Sweets and they would come over, Nat added them to the game and gave the sweets the role of a maid... (possibly a maid whose in love with the knight aka Law).

Second Headcanon, before Sweets and Law were dating and they were just friends, Nat totally played matchmaking (or at least attempted to) She would have them play a game of restaurant and sit them down at a little toy table (decorated with a fake candle because Law hid the actual candles from her) while Nat used her little toy kitchen to prepare them some food (fake toy food obviously) and Law (possibly Sweets too) totally still has a photo on their phones from one of those fake dates.

Third Headcanon, Nat inherited a lot of her looks from her mother/mother's side (I don't know why but everytime I imagine how Nat looks, my brain always pictures her with orange/ginger hair, sorta tan skin and sorta dark green eyes (you can sorta see what I mean in the drawing I did of her..), but despite that, Nat totally loves her parents equally (unless one of them gives her a bunch of sugar... then they automatically win her over)

Fourth Headcanon, Nat totally has tried to sneak around the shop (the woodworking shop, I can't remember if the name of the shop was ever mentioned) probably to look at all of the tools but was quickly caught by either Desmond or Law (and she was slightly jokingly banned from the shop for a bit until she was old enough where she knew better then to touch random tools)

Fifth Headcanon, Nat has totally done that adorable little kid thing where if she sees Law (or Sweets) sick she will dress up in a little doctor costume (along with some toy doctor tools) and acted like she is giving them a check up (or she pretends to heal them with healing magic)

Sixth Headcanon, (it was mentioned by Law once I think that Nat's grandparents slightly spoil her..) so I totally imagine there's been times where Nat hasn't wanted to leave her grandparent's place and Law (not literally) had to drag her out of there and she was upset with him for the rest of the day until the next day where she returned to her usual bubbly self.

Seventh Headcanon, ya know those backpacks (that mostly looks like animals, for example: a monkey? They usually come with a leash attached to it?) Nat totally has one... and when Law and her (usually Sweets too) go somewhere like a park, Nat usually has to wear the backpack leash or she will run off (eventually though she will get tired though she would probably not admit it and Law or Sweets has to pick her up and carry her... or she just sits on one of their shoulders...)

Eighth Headcanon, Nat totally has tried to bake a birthday cake for Law... (it probably ended up burnt or a mess but Law still ate some of it so that Nat would be happy... (he totally threw up afterwards but in secret..)

Ninth Headcanon, Nat was definitely one of those kids who at first asked why Law and her mom weren't together (or lived together) but she eventually grew used to it (and I imagine she does sees Sweets somewhat as a guardian but not as a replacement for her mom and Sweets totally understands that, Nat and Sweets just understand each other like that)

Tenth Headcanon, Nat totally borrows/steals either Law or Sweets phone to either play games, take photos or record small random videos (I imagine Nat also being the type of kid who uses the phone until it's battery is dead and just handing the phone back to Law or Sweets before running off fast like she had just committed a crime XD)

[fall-shorter]

hey! this is chance & here’s the prompt for week 6. what are your oc's bedrooms like? messy? neat? carefully designed? or a collection of their favorite things? you can verbally describe or use photos, whatever you think is best.

Okay, so this time I'm doing Szili only, because I don't have everything designed yet and It would take me AGES to describe each one. So for visuals here is up-to-date Szili's room made in TS4 and an older 2022 piece of Szili in her room (a bit outdated) :D

Couldn't do everything on point in TS4, cause, of course... it has it's limitations with items, so lemme do a text description as well:

"The room was surprisingly cosy, despite it's white walls; in a black, white and brown pallette, with some golden accessories, so It's obvious who is the owner. A big bed right in the middle of the room, with sheets changed almost every other day, for reasons that will soon be obvious. On each side of the bed were warm fairly lights, hanging down from the top of the wall.

On the right was a quite big closet with lots of very mismatching clothes and a pile of high heel shoes of different kinds. Sometimes clothes were left on the floor if no one was visiting. On the top of the drawer there was a bunch of beauty products that probably didn't fit in the bathroom cabinet, a well-used candle, a fake plant, half-smoked pack of ciggaretes and a golden figure of a lucky cat probably long after the batteries have run out, so it was just sitting there, motionless. Above all this mess was a home assistant screen, showing the weather or some other usless crap, just like in any other room in any other house these days. Tucked in the corner of the room was a desk. Perfectly clean, without a single scratch on it. It wasn't too hard to guess that it wasn't because of the excessive pedantry, or rather the fact it was simply not used…. ever. Next to the door was a huge, human-sized mirror, probably so she can spend few minutes every morning flexing in front of it. Lastly, behind the mirror, there was a wall of glass, partially covered by black curtains, giving a view to a sad and grim street of Morkland, which made being inside feel way safer and warm."

Thanks for the ask!!

[harfanfare]

Snow White and Juliet

trigger warning: suicide and just whatever happened in Romeo and Juliet & Snow White but darker.

People tend to define different things with the same word.

According to some, the lack of life is simply death. Others include there people who do nothing but work. They have no love, no passion. Those who remain unmoved by the suffering of others. Heartless ones.

For one poison vendor, "lifeless" meant being unable to move, drink, eat, but think. Think for eternity about nothing, what is described harsher than real death.

◆◆◆

„Test 103 was accomplished with success.”

There is confusion in the experiment hall. Researchers run from monitor to monitor, all comparing unexpected, but desired results.

No errors in documentation. No lapses in research. No difference in subsequent attempts.

The team of researchers was cheering in awe: the antidote for one of the biggest poisons in Twisted Wonderland, the "Poisoned Apple", has been found.

It's time to wake Neige Leblanche up.

◆◆◆

The Leblanche Tragedy happened almost two years ago when many haters got to harras Neige and his fiancée, [Name], who just announced their relationship. You were meeting already for quite a time, and knowing each other even longer. It wasn't easy to break any of you by hate.

But it wasn't also easy to live with people, who despised you with all their heart.

"It's alright," Neige whispered, his fingers combing the hair of his beloved. His voice was tranquil and soothing as always, almost by itself vanishing every bad experience. "It will be alright. I will make sure it will be."

"I know. And I am always thankful for that," you replied, cuddling him even more. Neige scent was another thing that hadn't changed over years; it was still the same aroma of wild, but soft flowers and heartwarming sunrays. Another wonderful feature. "I love you, Neige."

"I love you too."

That was the last discussion you had before the disaster happened.

And it started from no one else than Vil Schoenheit, who wasn't even aware how his actions will take a completely another turn than everyone expected.

◆◆◆

"Will it solve it? The sleeping potion?" you asked, turning the vial in your hands. It was no bigger than your little finger, and the potion there was taking only half of the space.

Not so long ago, around an hour, you found yourself invited by Vil to a tea party. You couldn't figure if he had been struck by your "help me" aura or was searching for a company, but you ended up in gardens, staring at the porcelain pot in which the tea was brewing.

It favoured the first meeting you two had: the tableware with the same, old-fashioned flowery pattern and the rich aroma of tea leaves of Vil's choice. Only a plate with sweets and fruits was something new—it was hard to convince Vil to bring anything sugary and even harder to make him try it. He finally ate a small (microscopical, in your opinion) piece of hand-made shortcake, but that was all you could do to let him appreciate the sweet energy shot.

"I cannot guarantee anything," Vil replied, watching you examine the bottle's content. "But it may work. With an emphasis on 'may'," he added, tearing his gaze away. Vil was your dear friend, and even if he didn't approve of your taste in men, especially your pick for a future husband, you were close enough to have him help you come up with a solution. "Use it as a last resort. I... am sure you will be able to find a better, safer way. For example, dumping your fiancé."

You giggled, but both of you knew his proposition was impossible. You could never leave Neige.

"Thank you, no thank you," you answered with a smile. The only thing that didn't let it last longer, were your problems. "Again, I am indebted to you. Thank you for being the best and the best prettiest in my life."

Vil puts the tea away, its taste suddenly feeling bitter and hard to swallow.

"...Well then. [Name], don't be reckless."

"I will try my best not to. I promise."

◆◆◆

You found a solution.

If you were the reason which made people attack Neige on social media and not only, why wouldn't you just disappear?

Not for eternity. Only for a month, maybe a few weeks, until the turmoil would silence. You and Neige could get married this way, inviting no one else than the closest of the closest people for the ceremony. Announcing your marriage and fake death wouldn't be that much of a shock as many could assume. There is a field called effective business, and everything can happen under that name.

I know how reckless is that, you were writing your thoughts on a paper. Once the dwarfs you invited to yourself saw the letter, they would give it to Neige. And you two would no longer have anyone who could undo anything. But think about it, Neige! If we may finally be together, isn't it a great chance?

You reassured him in the letter that you would wake up after few days. You also highlighted that he doesn't have to use your plan and let you two fight against the darker side of Wonderland together. He could just let you have week-long beauty sleep and with a fresh mind, try to solve your problems by less drastic measures: the press or announcements.

Maybe you were only overthinking and complicating the situation too much.

Your most loving fan, [Name]

You signed yourself and closed the envelope.

Your gaze returned to the sleeping potion. I am exaggerating, you thought. Your plans could fit into a script of a good film but in real life? What you were about to do felt... irrational and foolish.

Maybe you would change your mind if not the rush.

Once you heard footsteps on the floor and your friends, dwarfs, calling your name, you knew it is time to make a decision.

You quickly unscrewed the bottle and put it in your mouth. The sweet, sleepy fragrance with a hint of rosemary sent you to a sleep that devotedly resembled a death. The crash and sound of breaking glass as you fell to the ground immediately alerted everyone in the mansion. You couldn't hear the accelerated footsteps, screams, cries and commotion that was going on over you.

Before anyone could think to do something other than trying to wake you up and calling the hospital, the letter with your plan flew outside the window.

That night you broke two things: the promise you made to Vil and a heart of Neige.

◆◆◆

The death of [Name], the fiancée of the most adored man in the world.

Marriage cancelled? The mystery behind the death of [Name] [Surname].

A Dead bride.

‏‏‎ ‎‏‏‎ ‎

Neige scrolled through the media, each article made his heart ache. He ignored a great count of calls and didn't manage to appear at your funeral in time.

He was a broken toy, who just lost its batteries. He was a wrack of what he was before. Beautiful on the outside, blank on the inside.

Wearing a dark, a bit too oversized suit, he laid against one of the roadside trees. He closed his eyes, trying not to focus on any people, buildings or sounds except his breath. It was slow and steady until he remembered why he tries to calm down; then he would choke on his breath, tears falling from his eyes and trying to not lose balance.

"Would you like an apple?"

Neige wiped his tears in a sleeve and slowly turned around to see an old lady behind a stall. It was ruined and seemed unattended for years. The counter was doty, wood softened and tore off in big pieces by the wind and rain. Between beautifully decorated shops and cafes, this stall seemed to be a remnant that no one ever wanted to touch.

"Thank you, but I am fine." Neige replied in his polite tone, but the smile he sent her looked like nothing near 'fine'. "I am not allowed to take anything from strangers, but that is really kind of you!"

"Not just a bite?" the lady continued, putting an apple on the counter. It was brown, slightly green, and Neige would never guess it was an apple. Maybe more like a rotten apple, but no one would say that this apple was unfresh. Adversely, it contained freshness, but not of the common kind. "Wouldn't you like to join your lover?"

Neige held his breath.

"You mean... to die?"

"What I mean has no value. You will understand it the other way, even if I tried to explain," she replied. Her voice was squeaky as she repeated the question the same enigmatic way she did the first time. "So, would you like an apple?"

"No, thank you..." Neige bowed slightly. He hesitated, before trying his best to speak up. "I- I think [Name] would hate me dying. Only if she could understand this too..."

"Maybe she did" the lady replied. There was conviction in her voice, and Neige couldn't help but take her words seriously. "Or maybe not."

Neige hoped you did. How he loved you and how your death changed him from the happiest man in the world, the saddest one. He didn't know why you took your life and why he didn't notice anything before. He regretted spending not as much time with you as he wanted to.

But nothing could be done to change the past.

"I will get going," Neige said. He glanced towards the old lady, who smiled at him and showed some of her lacking teeth. "And... could you fetch me this apple, please?"

◆◆◆

Once Neige's gaze settled on your figure, the world was immediately forgotten.

He could hear his pulse pounding in his ears much more than silence who was your only companion.

No flowers, candles and golden ornaments of the church could divide Neige's attention, as his pace fastened with every step he made towards you. He didn't hesitate to lock his fingers with yours. He squeezed them, wishing his warmth could reach you.

"[Name]..." he whispered, getting his face closer to your sleeping face. He gently removed the lost strands of hair from your face, not believing that you won't wake up anymore. As much as he wanted to, no mage in Twisted Wonderland could bring the dead back to life. At least not in human's form. "I love you so much. T-too much, I think. How can I live without... my life?"

He gave you one last 'farewell' kiss on the lips, his body next to yours. "See you soon, [Name]."

His expression is the softest one he ever wore, as he reaches for an apple.

He bit it.

And then 'died'.

No sooner than the poison completely took control of his body, you woke up.

"Neige...?" you murmured, bringing your hand to his cheek. The anxiety mingled with your thoughts once you look around yourself. "We are... in a coffin?" You sat. It required effort, after not using muscles for a whole week. By the time, you took a break, you conjectured what happened. You jerked your head around and let your hands cup your lover's face. "Ple-please, please, Neige, don't do this to me. Please."

He didn't respond and the bitterness you tasted when you kissed his still warm lips confirmed that he didn't use Vil's potion. He was poisoned, and the amount left on his lips wasn't enough to take you to the same place as him. "Why didn't left anything for me? Neige..."

Your eye caught the glimmer. You went closer to notice the dagger, resting on the floor. It wasn't that visible as the weapon would be, and until you were a step from it, you could see how thin the blade was. As edge as sturdy.

The fear paralyzed you, as you came back to the coffin. But the remorse and the sight of your lover's dead body were stronger. Your whole body was shivering, a tremor affecting you more than you could ever imagine, making you go mad. Insane.

With one sharp move, you dug the blade into your chest, scared and closing your eyes.

"I am a fool."

By the time anyone arrives, it is too late to rescue you or stop the poison coursing through Neige's veins.

◆◆◆

In the morning sun rises, and everyone in Wonderland wakes up.

It is also the first time in two years since Neige fell asleep.

He can't feel anything. He can't sense the flaxen shirt the doctors changed him in. He can't get his mind through the haze, that has been floating around his thoughts just after he drank the poison. He can't answer the calls of the doctors and his friends, dwarfs, who are gathering around his bed.

But he can open his eyes.

And once he does, the silence is overcoming. When the fact finally sinks in everyone's heart, a great cheer flies across the room. Some of the gathered give Neige comforting touch or reassuringly squeeze his hand.

It takes him some time to realize what is happening, why is he in the hospital room, why people are crying around him and why you aren't the first one he sees once he wakes up. His habit of kicking you while sleeping was something you complained and teased him about. Even if he didn't wake you in his sleep, when he was getting up, his knee would always hit your arm or stomach, waking you up and having you buck him off the bed as revenge.

What he also can do, except for trying to stay awake and catching things his visitors chatter around him, is to try to remember. He didn't lose his memories! It just needs some effort to get them back from the darkest recesses of his mind! And then to regret it.

A whole wave of memories hits him like a tsunami, not leaving him space to breathe and see anything else than chaos, now replaced by the memories of you two.

The kisses. The promises. The vowes. The proposal. The struggles. The tenacity to get over your problems. The plan. The dead body of yours.

He doesn't have to turn around to know that you aren't in a hospital bed beside him. He remembered some of the talks of his friends when he was sleeping. Now everyone is waiting for him to return.

"Neige! You've finally woke up, huh!" Che'nya chippers, his voice cracking at last words. He is relieved about the news and only bad Neige's condition stops him from throwing himself at his arms and spreading the revelation to everyone... No, not even Neige himself can stop him from the latter.

Neige wasn't going to stop him. His mind still replayed the "finally woke up" part, as if the film stopped at the most painful scene, then broke and started to replay the scene once again. And again.

He turned his head on the side, letting the tears run down his cheeks.

He really can't feel anything.

"That," Neige manages to whisper under his breath. It is the first time he tries to say anything, and grievously struggles to put his words together. "is- is... so cruel." Everyone stared at him in silence, the same way they did when Neige and his dead lover were found. His cry brings tears to everyone's eyes, having many people bow under the weight of sorrow and put a hand over their lips to not let themself break again. "I didn't want to wake up..!"

[pan-cakez]

Anniversary Ahijo

Sorry I'm a little late, I wasn't able to access my computer for a while. but it's all under control now! For @mindninjax's Domestic Daydream collab. You can find my Sugawara Piece here and my Aizawa fic here. And the other pieces are here.

sfw (fluff)

wc: 1.2k

Nanami x gn!reader

All new fics will be posted from @mxonigirimiya ❤❤

Evenings with Nanami were always quiet. He would come home from work around the same time, and you would have dinner warm and ready for him. It felt like every time he walked into the house his shoulders were slumped, and a quiet sigh would pull itself from him. His exhaustion was clear and you quickly picked up on it when you first started living together, learning to have dinner ready by the time he was home. Without fail, expressions of gratitude would escape from his lips, whether it be words spoken so quietly that you would almost miss it, or a soft kiss placed onto your body, after each meal. After dinner, he would offer to clean the dishes, and you would swat at his hands if he made an attempt to reach for them. And with each night, he would spend it recharging his battery with a good book, or spending it with you.

But tonight was different. Tonight marked your first year of marriage and you wanted everything to be special.

The scent of garlic fills the kitchen, and the heat of the stove slowly spreads across your face as you stir the sauce on the pan. Music was blasting through the house, the low beat of it slowly taking over you and soft hums start to come from you as well, blending into the melody of the songs. As the sauce starts to bubble, you turn the heat low and leave it to simmer.

Dusting off your apron, you move to the counter, scanning across it until you see a piece of paper. Grabbing the paper, you read it over and over, trying to commit the words on it to memory. You knew that Nanami’s favorite food was Ahijo, but you genuinely had no clue on how to make it. Even though you had the recipe in your hands, you still felt like you were messing something up. The insecurities seemed to be deafening, but you pushed it down as best as you could.

Bringing the spatula to your mouth, you blow softly, the steam running away from your breath. A taste test was the best way to silence that insecurity, and so you tap the spatula onto your finger and the moment you taste the sauce, pride fills your chest. Feeling the heat of the oven on your legs, you bend over and turn the light on. Gazing in, you see bread crisping around the edges, a golden hue covering the rest of it.

Satisfied with how the garlic bread is going, you turn off the oven and turn your attention to the dinner table. Usually it's bare, but tonight it’s adorned with a black table cloth. For some reason, it reminded you of the fancier restaurants you and Nanami have been to, so you tried your best to recreate it. Looking up at the clock, a soft sigh leaves your lips. Nanami will be home soon, and everything has to be perfect by then.

You start to set up the table, the porcelain plates across from each other, a fork and a knife on the side of each. Placing a folded black napkin on the plates, a smile spreads across your face. This whole thing felt silly. You could order out food and eat on the couch with Nanami today, and he would still be happy. But you wanted to go all out for him. He’s always so stressed, and working with Curses, it sometimes took a strain on him, even if he didn’t tell you. He didn’t need to though, because you always noticed how withdrawn he would get after a tough mission. How he would barely even touch his food, or would stare at the same page in his books for who knows how long. So of course you wanted to go all out today. At least he would appreciate it, and it would give him a little pick me up, and he definitely needed it.

What the table needed was more ambiance, you thought, and so you placed a fake candle in the middle of the table. Suddenly, a timer went off and your attention immediately went to the sauce. You start stirring it, the sauce moving with each motion and quickly coming back together in your spatula’s wake. It doesn’t smell burnt, and when you taste it, it doesn’t taste horrible, so that’s a win in your book. Piece by piece, you add shrimp to the dish, and mix it into the sauce.

Hands suddenly placed themselves on your hips, and you felt a body gently press itself into you. Nanami’s cologne surrounds you, and you feel his breath on your neck as he whispers, “Happy Anniversary my love.” He starts swaying you to the music, silently humming along. You melt into his touch, and let out a small giggle. “Dinner smells wonderful.” The praise heats your face and he definitely notices the blush softly creeping onto your cheeks.

He peppers small kisses on your neck, pulling you impossibly closer to him. He starts humming the song into your neck, the vibrations seeming to go right to your heart. before spinning you around to face him, and pulling you against him. One of his hands leaves featherlight touches on your waist, while the other envelops one of your hands. Before you know it, he leads you in a waltz, and for a moment you feel as if you were in a ballroom with your Prince Charming holding you against him. Nanami lifts a hand and twirls you, a smile adorning his face as you giggle, before pulling you close again, not even air able to get between you two. You felt as if this moment was straight out of a fairytale, and you felt the love you had for him bubble in your chest. The two of you almost float around the kitchen, swaying with each other until the song ends. He pulls you in for a deep kiss, his own love for you obvious in the way his lips meet yours. He steals your breath away, and when he pulls away, your foreheads rest against each other as you both pant softly.

“The Ahijo is almost ready.” You giggle at his statement, and move back to the stove. Mixing everything, you smile at the smell that wafts from the pan, and Nanami leans against the counter as his gaze lands on your hands. He smiles softly watching you start to take out the garlic bread from the oven and start to cut it. Nanami moves to help you and you slap his hand away.

“Go sit! Dinner will be done shortly.” He chuckles and moves to sit at the table, his eyes never leaving you. You continue cutting the garlic bread as well as a toasted loaf you had in the back of the oven. You plate both breads, and place the pan in the center of the table. Pulling two wine glasses from a cabinet, you place them on the table and pull out the wine you were hiding from Nanami under the table. The sound of the bottle popping reached Nanami’s ears, and all he could think was how lucky he was to have you. He watches you pour the wine and as soon as you place the bottle on the table, you sit across from him. You raise your glass and he raises his, ready for your toast.

“One year down. Forever to go.” He smiles at your words.

“To forever.”

[psychomeows]

Happy Halloween! Have the Nightkiller family in costume lol. I wasn't going to write anything to go with this but I couldn't resist! So here's a little one shot!

Nightmare belongs to Joku Killer belongs to Rahafwabas Miracle belongs to me

It was Halloween, the nights were longer, it was getting colder, rain poured down from the heavens and the castle was fully decorated. The whole place already looked spooky but that didn't stop the Murder Time Trio from putting up fake spiders' webs and weird witchy things that made noises when you walk past. Jack-O-lanterns were placed around the castle as well, with battery operated candles since Nightmare couldn't trust them with real fire. Plastic bats hung from the ceiling; there was a themed wreath on every door and banners and paper chains on the walls. Nightmare couldn't go anywhere without seeing something Halloween. Even the cushions in the common room and library were replaced with Halloween ones and cutlery, plates and cups were replaced too.

It had been like this every year since the boys joined. At first Nightmare had been mad about it but as time went on he stopped caring as much. If it kept them quiet and out of his way then so be it, plus it did keep to his aesthetics. Things had been slightly different for the past few years though. As soon as Miracle was old enough to do arts and crafts and understood more about what Halloween was, little decorations made by the child were added to the 'bought' ones. Mostly it was drawings or paper cut outs but there were some things Miracle had made out of food packaging that Horror had saved for him. Spiders, pumpkins, witches' hats, etc. Nightmare couldn't help but be happy about that; his little prince was so talented.

Miracle loved Halloween. That wasn't really surprising with who he was raised by. The six year old was so excited about it that he'd come running into his parents' room on the first of October to shout about it and beg to start decorating.

Halloween day and night weren't what they used to be. Gone were the days where the Murder Time Trio played drinking games, watched 18+ horror movies and played 18+ horror games. Replacing that was child friendly games and cartoons. There was still the same amount of sweets and cakes but everything was made suitable for the child.

Another thing Miracle loved doing was dressing up. As much as Nightmare liked seeing his son happy, he always dreaded Halloween evenings. At least it wasn't something they did all day and kept it for after dinner but still! Nightmare cringed at the thought of the previous year where Miracle had wanted him to dress as an octopus with him and cried when Nightmare said no. Nightmare had tried to put his foot down on it but the crying wouldn't stop and the Murder Time Trio were already in their shark costumes… Even though Nightmare had told Killer no pictures he was sure that there were some… He just hoped they weren't shared; that would be so embarrassing! He had the reputation of a tyrant to keep!

He just knew he'd be roped into another costume this year as well. They'd just had dinner and Killer had taken Miracle to his room to get changed. Nightmare was always kept in the dark about what it was because Killer knew he'd try to say no. He was just waiting for it and dreading it as he read a horror novel by the fire in the library. He knew Miracle would come running in at any moment now...

"Daddy! Daddy! Look! Look!"

...And there goes his peaceful reading time. Nightmare slipped a bookmark into his novel, put it aside and turned to face his son. A small smile spread onto his face at his little witch costume. He had on his normal black shorts but had a dark brown long sleeved tunic with a thick lighter brown belt holding it closed. He had a different red cape from his normal one with stars all over it and a matching witch's hat with his crown put on over the hat. He was even carrying a little broomstick.

Miracle ran right up to Nightmare and jumped up onto his lap, his hat almost falling off in the process but he managed to catch it. Nightmare managed a little laugh; this wasn't so bad. It was normally matching costumes Miracle insisted they do and a witch's covenant was at least made of three witches. While a witch wasn't the first thing Nightmare would choose to dress as this wasn't nearly as bad as an octopus.

"Hello, Little Prince," Nightmare said as he made sure he had a good hold of the excited child. "Or should I say Little Witch?"

Miracle giggled and grabbed the end of his cape so he could hold it up to show it to his father. "Mama got me a really cool costume! Look, it has pretty stars on it!"

"I can see that, very cool," Nightmare said as he looked around for Killer. "Speaking of your mother; where is he?"

"Oh, I left him behind. He's still changing."

Nightmare sighed and playfully pulled his son's hat over his eyes making him giggle again. "Well, maybe we should go find him. I take it he's a witch as well?"

"Nuh uh," Miracle said, shaking his head as he fixed his hat. That caused a sinking feeling in Nightmare's metaphorical stomach. If Killer wasn't part of a witch's covenant, then what was he?

"Here I am!" Killer called happily as he teleported in. "And here's your costume, Moonlight!"

The black cat onesie was tossed in Nightmare's face as Killer stood in front of them with his hands on his hips and wearing the same onesie.

"Oh hell no!" Nightmare called as he looked at it. "I'm not dressing as a cat!"

"What else would accompany a witch?" Killer asked with a smirk. "We're the familiars!"

"Other witches," Nightmare said as he glared at Killer. From the look on his face it was his idea or he put the idea into Miracle's head. "There are at least three witches in a covenant! And we have a real black cat!"

"Yeah but Horror and Dust are the other witches," Killer said. "And Diamond looks like she's gonna be Horror's familiar since he's carrying around cat treats so she follows him. I think he liked the idea of having a real cat for his familiar."

"It's funny! She keeps trying to steal the yummies in his pocket!" Miracle giggled and grabbed up the onesie. "Please, Daddy. I want to have two familiars!"

Nightmare glared at Killer again. He was a King, the Guardian of Negativity, a deity, he'd killed thousands and made thousands more suffer… And he was being reduced to a six year old's familiar for Halloween.

"Come on, Babe," Killer said as he perched himself on the arm of Nightmare's chair. "It's just for one evening and it'll make Miracle happy, won't it Kiddo?"

"Please~ I'll be extra good! And do extra homework!" Miracle begged looking up at Nightmare with big eyes.

"He'll probably cry for hours again if you say no," Killer whispered, making Nightmare sigh. He really didn't have much choice unless he wanted to listen to his son scream and cry, which he very much didn't.

"Fine, but no photos of me!" Nightmare gave in. He knew there probably would be photos anyway but he would still make sure Killer knew he wasn't happy with that.

"Yay!" Both Killer and Miracle shouted as they hopped off and did a little victory dance before giving each other a high five.

Nightmare rubbed his eye and sighed as he grabbed the onesie and stood up. "Give me a minute to change and I'll be right back…"

There was no point in leaving the library to change so Nightmare simply went into another aisle. He scowled at the onesie as he held it up to look at it. "It's just for a couple of hours," Nightmare muttered to himself, "and it's for Miracle…" He'd never thought that one day he'd be dressing like a cat but if it'd make his Little Prince happy then so be it. Besides, he'd done really well on the last test…

With a sigh Nightmare pulled off his clothes and put on the onesie. It fit perfectly which was annoying; if it didn't fit he'd have an excuse. As it was he'd have to go out there and face his gang dressed like this…

It was best just to go for it so after folding his clothes neatly and putting them in the corner, Nightmare left the aisle and went back to his family.

"Mama! Look!" Miracle called out when he spotted his father coming over. "Daddy's wearing it!"

As much as Nightmare hated the costume, seeing Miracle so excited did make it worth it even though he still glared at Killer when he laughed.

"Looking good~" Killer said with a wink as he met Nightmare half way. "Just one thing…"

"Hey!" Nightmare called as Killer grabbed the hood of the onesie that Nightmare hadn't put up and pulled it up. While making sure to pull further so it covered Nightmare's eye.

"There, now it's purr-fect~" Killer said while actually making a purring sound.

Nightmare sighed again as he fixed the hood so it was on right just as Miracle came running up and giggling.

"Now I have my familiars! Can we go now?" Miracle asked as he bounced a little and looked up at his parents with big starry eyes.

"Of course we can," Killer said as he scooped his son up into his arms while being careful of the broom Miracle was holding. "Come on, Babe. This party will be lots of fun!"

Nightmare sighed. He knew there was no getting out of this so he might as well just go for it. He began to walk off with Killer quickly following behind him while encouraging Miracle to sing "Spooky Scary Skeletons." Nightmare just shook his head but couldn't help but smile; he hated his own costume but Miracle really was cute.

The common room was the most decorated room. Banners were stuck on the wall, balloons filled the room, the table was covered with an orange and black table cloth and filled with cakes, sweets and a cauldron filled with juice that would probably end up spiked when Miracle went to bed. There were Jack-O-Lanterns as well and more fake spider webs plus most of Miracle's decorations. Even the lights were dimmed, ready for the party.

Nightmare opened the door as Miracle stopped singing. He looked inside and spotted Horror and Dust wearing matching witches' costumes but while Miracle's was red; Dust's was purple and Horror's was green. Nightmare turned to Killer with a raised brow making him laugh.

"Found all this in a costume store. The witches' costumes came in different colours for adults but only red for kids. It was too perfect so I got 'em. At first I thought we could be witches but Miracle suggested we be the familiars instead so I swapped the adult costumes for the right sizes for Horror and Dust and got us the cat onesies."

"Of course," Nightmare sighed as he turned back to his friends.

Dust was laughing as Diamond tried to get into Horror's pocket. Even the cat had a little orange cape on. "Maybe you should just let her have the treats," Dust suggested as Horror dodged a grabbing paw.

"But then she won't follow me! I want a familiar too!"

"Never thought I'd see the day when you would refuse to feed someone."

"She's been fed! She just ate all the food in her bowl like an hour ago!"

"She's a cat," Killer said as he put Miracle down so the child could drop his broom and go running to the cat and gently pick her up. "She smells the food and wants it."

"Oh, hey guys!" Dust said as he quickly stood up and laughed lightly at the sight of his boss in a cat onesie. "You two look great!"

"Shut up, Dust," Nightmare said as he glared at him which only made him laugh more.

"I'm super kawaii!" Killer called out and lifted his arms to pose like an anime cat girl.

"Never say or do that again," Nightmare scolded Killer as he turned to him. "That is the cringiest thing you've done!"

"Aww but don't you think I'm super k-"

"Don't say that again! You sound like a weeb!"

"That's the point!"

"So, Killer's going to be hyper again this year?" Horror said as he watched Killer stick his tongue out at Nightmare.

"Looks like it," Dust agreed, "now he's the one you should be denying food to. He doesn't need a sugar rush on top of this."

Nightmare's and Killer's banter stopped when there was a little meow as Diamond rubbed herself against their legs in a greeting. It seemed she was distracted from the cat treats in Horror's pocket for now. Miracle giggled at the sight and pointed to his parents and the cat. "Kitties!" He called out and ran up to them. "All the kitties together!"

"...I've been reduced to a 'kitty'" Nightmare muttered as he watched Miracle pick up his broomstick again.

"It's just for one night, Moonlight," Killer whispered. "Once we put Miracle to bed you can change."

"I plan on it," Nightmare replied and he summoned his tentacles and slipped one around Killer's waist. "And I plan on taking you-"

"Hey guys, say cheese!" Dust called out suddenly making the three of them turn around.

Miracle giggled and lifted a hand to wave at the Polaroid camera that Dust was holding while Killer made his anime cat girl pose again. Nightmare just stared deadpan at the camera and before he had the chance to tell Dust not to take the picture, it was taken.

"Dust!" Nightmare snapped as he watched him take the print out and put it face down on the table.

"What? The costumes are cool."

"I only agreed to this if pictures weren't taken."

"Oh… Sorry, Boss," Dust said as he put the camera down and backed away from it.

"Don't worry, Babe," Killer said as he walked further into the room and picked up a chocolate eyeball to eat. "No one but us will ever see that picture. I promise."

"Make sure of it," Nightmare said with a sigh as he walked in as well and took a seat on the sofa. He really hoped there would be no more pictures with him in them. If the others wanted to take pictures of themselves that was fine and he knew Killer would want to take lots of pictures of their son.

Miracle looked really happy right now as he came running over to the box of games that had been put in the corner and placed his broom beside it so he could take out a game. Most of the games were normal party games with a Halloween twist. They had bean bag toss but with pumpkin shaped buckets, instead of pin the tail on the donkey Dust had drawn up 'pin the spider on the web,' Killer had set up an 'eyeball hunt' with eyeball bouncy balls and Horror had made a ghost piñata. There were also plenty of Halloween balloons to play games with.

The four adults watched as Miracle pulled out the bean bags and came running back to them. "Play time?" Miracle asked hopefully as he looked up at them.

"Yep," Killer said as he took the bean bag that was handed to him. "There are lots of games and lots of sweets to get through."

"Don't eat too many sweets," Nightmare said to his son as he ran up to him to give him a bean bag as well. "You'll get sick and be too hyper for bed."

"But-" Miracle tried to argue but stopped when Nightmare raised his hand to shush him.

"No buts, the sweets will last; you don't have to eat them all at once."

Miracle pouted but nodded as he looked to the table. "...Can I have the toffee apple now?"

Nightmare glared at the treat, (he really hated having apples in the castle,) but sighed and gave in. "You can, but because it's the biggest treat you can't have as many of the little ones now as well."

"Okay~" Miracle sang as he quickly gave a bean bag to his uncles and grabbed the toffee apple off of the table before he ran off to set up the buckets as he started munching into the apple.

Nightmare watched as the game began, taking his turn quickly and deliberately missing or getting the lower scoring buckets to make sure Miracle was winning and happy. The night was going to be full of joy and laughter but Nightmare didn't mind if it meant his son was having fun. He'd just have to work extra hard tomorrow.

[dreamescapeswriting]

One Summer In Paris ~ Finale ~ JJK [M]

WORD COUNT: 4.7K

GENRE: Fluffy, romance, ex-lovers to lovers, 

PAIRING: Jungkook x Fem!Reader

DESCRIPTION: Jeon Jungkook had always loved Paris with its amazing views, incredible museums and the small Bookshop right across from the Effiel Tower. It was were he spent a lot of his summer breaks as a kid so he loved it well into his adulthood. There was one bookshop he rented a room in the summer that changed his life. It was a place where he felt happy and at peace whenever he had the chance to stay there. Where he fell in love for the first time and had his first heartbreak, a lot of firsts for him were in Paris. But what happens when he goes back to the same book shop four years later and finds the love of his life in the arms of another with a daughter who looks suspiciously like him…

THEMES: SMUT CHAPTER Single Parent, Jungkook x Fem!Reader, self insert, Smut will be included in a later chapter

MASTERLIST || PREVIOUS || EPILOGUE

After a week of the boys being in Paris the news that Jungkook was a father was being spread throughout the internet and world through the corrected sources this time though. He had to do a formal interview with a magazine company who worked for BigHit and were under their payroll so that the right things were being spoken about. No-one was allowed to just come up to you or Areum in the street or there would be some serious consequences. The relationship between you and Jungkook was never announced since neither of you knew what was happening just yet. As far as the media was concerned you were close friends just raising your daughter to the best of your abilities.

After some investigating everything came to light on how Jungkook was found, it was a mixture of some teenage girl tweeting out a video asking if anyone else thought it looked like Jungkook as well as an “unknown” source. The unknown source came to light as David who’s ego had been bruised too badly that he decided to take it out on both you and Jungkook. Calling everyone he thought of, telling magazines online that he knew where Jungkook was. After one person saw it with the first photograph the teen had tweeted out the news spread like wildfire. David got what was coming to him though, Bighit were suing him for slander against Jungkook.

 All of the magazines painted him as the good guy who had no idea that his daughter existed and you were painted to be the girl who didn't know who Jungkook was at the time of the relationship, it was easier and less messy that way. The world didn't need to know all of the details about your lives together, they didn't need to know every aspect of what you and Jungkook went through. 

"What are you thinking about?" Jungkook questioned when he saw you looking at Areum with Taehyung and Namjoon - they were playing dress-up after just getting back from Disney land that day. The boys had insisted on taking her - along with guards so no one would bother them. 

"How different her life is going to be now." You admitted as Jungkooked wrapped his arms around your body and laid his chin on your shoulder. Things with Jungkook had been a little on and off for the last week neither of you had enough time or space to talk about what was happening. You acted like a real couple but you weren't enterally sure what you were since he was famous...The father of your daughter but it didn't mean you were or weren't dating. 

"Jungkook what-" 

"Let me take you out tonight," You spoke at the same time but you stopped your sentence first and stared into his eyes wondering what to say to him, you were going to ask him what you were together but now he was asking you out on a date.

"What-What?" You stuttered out turning your whole body to look at him this time ignoring everyone else that was in the room with you. 

"Let me take you out, just you and me...Please?" Jungkook had been trying to think of a way to talk to you about life and how things were going to be from now on all week and this was the only way he could think of doing it properly. He'd put so much thought into everything and he was finally ready to have a serious conversation about it all. 

"I didn't think you were allowed to go out publically." You whispered as you thought back to his manager telling him off for trying to sneak out a couple of nights ago. He shrugged his shoulders looking over at his manager who was reading through what everyone was thinking of Jungkook and his family on his tablet. That was what you were, you were a family even if you weren't together anymore...or yet. Some fans had reacted better than others, others claimed that you were faking, Areum wasn't truly his but if anyone took the time to look at Areum or spend time with her they would be able to tell she was in fact related to Jungkook. 

"I'm not but, who said it has to be public...Trust me okay? I'll make this all perfect." You sighed thinking about it for a second, it would be nice to get out of the hotel you seemed to have been stuck in all week. Management had moved you in once the scandal dropped, the shop had been closed since - you wondered what Grace had been thinking about all of this but at the same time after what she told you about what she said to Jungkook, a part of you didn't care.

"I trust you," He smiled leaning forward to kiss your cheek before he made his way over to their manager, you watched him for a couple of seconds before deciding to go and rescue Namjoon and Taehyung from the makeup your daughter had gotten that day. 

"My little princess seems to have turned the princes into princesses." You giggled as you swooped Areum up into your arms and blew a raspberry onto her shoulder playfully, she screamed wildly shouting that you were a dragon trying to steal the princess away. 

"We'll save you!" Taehyung announced loudly pulling out a fake foam sword as he started to hit you on the leg with it but you laughed evilly and ran away with Areum.

Jungkook kept his hands over your eyes as he leads you through the bookshop, you knew where he was taking you since you both had to run away from the hotel while the boys distracted the manager.

"Fuck," You groaned as your arm came into contact with the fifth bookshelf in a row, Jungkook hissed as he flinched. He didn't mean to bang you into every shelf in the shop, in his head this had gone over a lot smoother.

"Sorry." He mumbled as he carefully sat you down on the blanket he had laid out for you already. He'd snuck off to the bookshop earlier that afternoon to make sure everything was ready and now he could finally bring you back here. He was trying to recreate one of your dates together and have it be a nice little surprise. 

"You can open them in a second, hang on." He made sure your eyes were closed before rushing off to turn the main lights off in the store. 

"Open," Your eyes slowly fluttered open and you looked around at the shop floor letting your eyes adjust to the dim lighting. You were snuggled in between two bookshelves, a picnic blanket was on the floor surrounded by small battery-operated candles you knew what he was doing the second you saw it all. 

"Jungkook-" You looked up at him and that was when you spotted the fairy lights lining the top of the shelves to look like a starry night sky. You gasped as your eyes began to well up with tears, he was recreating a night you spent out by the river under the stars. You'd fallen asleep in his arms and he had to carry you home, it was also the night you gave him a tattoo. A small one on his arm just above the inside of his elbow, your initials.

"I got all your favourite foods as well if they're still your favourite. I mean I don't know if you changed it I heard that pregnancy can sometimes effect-" He was cut off when you kissed his lips softly to stop him from nervously rambling on about the food inside of the picnic basket. 

When you pulled away from his lips you looked into his eyes and whispered to him

"This is perfect," He began turning a bright red which made you giggle at the thought that a simple and small kiss could do that to him. It was good to know that you still had that kind of effect on him. 

"Thanks for this," You whispered again as he handed you a small plate and began to load it up with different foods you'd told him you loved before. 

Hours later you were just laying together talking over things when he asked you a question, 

"Do you remember our last date...Before I left?" You were both laying on the floor staring up at the fairy lights, your head was resting on his arm as he questioned you on random things about his time there. The date had been going amazingly so far, there were no phone calls from the boys, no one had tried to interrupt you and it just felt as though nothing had changed over the last four years. As if he hadn't been away and there was a huge fight with one another. It was exactly the way it was supposed to be. How things should have stayed if you had told him. 

"Was that the one where we came back and slept in front of the fireplace?" You questioned him as you popped a piece of popcorn into his mouth, he hummed while nodding his head at you. 

"Yeah I remember it," You started giggling as you remembered Jungkook that night. He'd been so nervous about something that he'd knocked wine all over the floor and all down your dress. 

"You covered me in red wine," You started laughing again and he nervously laughed about it scratching the back of his neck as he remembered it, 

"I was going to tell you that night that I loved you...Then I was going to come clean about who I was...I was always going to tell you, Y/n." Your heart stopped as you heard him admitting this to you. All these years you thought that he never told you because he didn't trust you or something, 

"You were?" He nodded his head as he started to play with your hair, he couldn't bring himself to look at you as he admitted all of this. 

"I was so nervous about it that I spilt drinks, my palms were sweating and I couldn't breathe. I told you when you were asleep though," He chuckled pathetically making his chest rise and fall, you turned to lay on your side facing him and put your head on his chest just laying there as you giggled softly. 

"Doesn't really count if I'm asleep," He smiled weakly as he began rubbing your lower back with his hand just enjoying his time with you while he could. 

The two of you sat there in silence for a few more seconds before you looked down at the floor beside him and bit your lip, 

"I didn't know I was pregnant when I saw you last...I said it to hurt you...I-I didn't know." He looked at you as you began to frown at the floor, 

"I knew you weren't like that so I figured as much." You sniffled a little and sat up as you looked at him seriousness coming into the atmosphere now. 

"I-I wanted to tell you but I didn't know how to get into contact with you." He watched as you seemed to look in pain as you told him this, it had been something that had been weighing on your chest for a while since you told him that and you hated yourself for doing it to him. 

"We didn't really end on good terms...I should have tried to contact you as well...I really do love you Y/n-" He stopped as he realised he said "love" instead of the past tense. It was true. He'd been in love with you since the moment he laid eyes on you, he'd never believed in love at first sight until then. He'd always had it set in his mind that when he met the love of his life he would hear alarm bells but instead of alarm bells when he met you it was the church bells and a whole choir singing loudly so he could hear and know it was you.

"I-I love you too." Your eyes were wide at first but you knew it was true, there was no one else that you could ever love more than Jungkook - other than Areum but that was a different kind of love. There was no one else in the world that was more perfect for you. 

It happened suddenly, you were laid below Jungkook as he kissed you passionately, his hands keeping him pressed above you while your hands worked their way into his hair. 

"I love you," He whispered against your lips as he kissed you again, you giggled pulling him down closer to your lips. 

"I love you too," He smirked hearing the words leave your mouth he never wanted you to stop saying them to him, 

"Say it again," He whined out desperately as you pulled back from the kiss to look him in the eyes.

"I love you Jeon Jungkook," He smiled brightly bringing you into another kiss, the sparks from before all still there. The same church bells and choir singing loudly for him to know that this was real, this is where his heart belonged.

An intense makeout session lead to you sitting on the floor of the book shop now holding a stick and poke tattoo kit Jungkook had brought along with him again, just like the first time you gave him a tattoo. 

"This is insane, you can go and get a real one Guk." You looked at him nervously and he shook his head waiting for you to just tattoo him. This meant more to him than going to have a real one done, 

"I want you to be the one to do this," He admitted as he handed you everything you needed. He'd show you what he wanted done on his arm, 

"Where?" You questioned looking at Areum's name written in a fancy font on a piece of paper. He stripped out of his shirt to reveal his tattooed arms and you couldn't help but look at them all. Wanting to know every story to each and every one of them but then your eyes found his first one. The small one that you'd done before, 

"I want it here," He whispered pointing to the blank space below your initials on his arm, as soon as you saw the initials you felt a warm feeling spread all over your body.

"Y-You didn't cover it?" He shook his head as your eyes welled up with tears, the thought of him keeping a part of you with him all the time made you want to cry. 

"I-I kept your shirt..." You admitted as your tears began to leave your eyes, your vision returning to normal as you took hold of the kit and got ready to tattoo him. He had a huge smile on his face as he thought about you snuggled into his shirt whenever you missed him or something. 

"You're sure?" You questioned as you held his arm in your hand referring to the tattoo once again, 

"Positive," With that you began inking his arm with the tools while holding him steady, apologising every three seconds in case it was hurting him too much.

"It's perfect," He whispered as you applied some tattoo goo he'd brought along with him before placing the tattoo under some cling film to keep it protected for the first night. 

"Just like her," You whispered as you stared at your handy work, it looked really good to say you'd only ever done small ones before. 

"She is," Jungkook chuckled while holding your hand in his. The air was silent but it wasn't the awkward kind, it was just a nice silenced between you both before he began leaning into you again. 

"Say it again." He begged as he looked into your eyes. You knew what he was talking about without him saying it, it was all he ever wanted to hear from now on. 

"No, I've said it all night." You groaned jokingly as you tried to push him away from you but he dragged you to sit on his lap and whispered it in your ear as he kisses your neck softly. 

"Say it," He begged while kissing down your jaw, each kiss making you needier each second. 

"Say it." He growled pulling you down on his lap harder making you whimper, this time it was an order and you pushed your hands into his hair whimpering as he kissed your neck.

"I, Y/n Y/l/n love you, Jeon Jungkook." He smirked before kissing up to your lips and kissing you roughly, you bit down on his lip playfully earning a groan from him and you giggled. 

"Fuck, I love you too, I love you so much Y/n," He whimpered as he laid your down below him on the floor, you wrapped your legs around his waist not wanting him to go away just yet but he didn't. He ran his tongue along your bottom lip and you granted him access, allowing his tongue to explore your mouth while you sucked on it a little bit. He ground his hips down into you while smirked, you moaned as you felt how hard he was behind the jeans he was wearing. 

"Needy?" You teased running your hand down the front of his chest before palming him through the rough fabric of his pants, 

"Very." He grunted as you began to undo his belt buckle, pushing him to lay down on the floor as you worked your way out of his jeans. 

"W-What are you doing-" He groaned loudly as you took him from his boxer and began massaging him in your hand, he was so much bigger than you remembered and his tip was bright red. 

"So needy baby," You cooed at him before looking up into his eyes, he watched you, infatuated with what you were going to do. 

"P-Please-" Your tongue began licking small but fast strokes on his head, paying more attention to his slit which was already dripping with precum. You placed the tip into your mouth sucking him clean while he threw his head back against the floor and moaned out your name. 

"Fuck please...I-I need more," You looked up at him while pumping him in your hand, he looked so breathtaking laid out for you like this. Needy and begging for you, you licked the underside of his cock from base to tip making sure to coat him in enough salvia so you could glide him in and out of your mouth with his but he moaned out as soon as you touched him. 

"Shit baby-" As soon as your mouth was around his cock it was as if a switch had gone off in his mind, he was no longer the whining and begging boy he'd just been for you but now he was grunted and finding it hard to control himself. 

You could see he was debating taking your head in his hands so you reached for his hands while you bobbed your head slowly, you placed his hands into your hair and nodded slight giving him the all-clear to take over. 

"Fuck I love you so fucking much." He forced your head down until your nose was pressed against his groin, you held back the gag and tears wanting him to feel as much pleasure as possible and he moaned out. Moving your head softly with his hands as he began to buck up into your mouth, 

"So fucking warm, I bet you're dripping aren't you." He smirked watching the way you avoided his gaze, he continued thrusting into your mouth as you whined out around him sending vibrations through his body. 

"Fuck, pull off baby, pull off," You pulled away and a sad expression appeared on your face, you wiped your lips instantly thinking you'd done something wrong when he attacked you with hungry kisses. Ripping your shirt open before removing your skirt in what seemed like one movement. You were left in your black panties and matching bra, 

"Expecting something tonight?" He chuckled while playing with the band of your panties, you shook your head so he ripped the panties off throwing the thin fabric somewhere in the shop. 

"Jungkook! That was my only good pair." He pushed you down onto the floor, pulling your ass into the air while keeping your chest flat on the floor. 

"I'll buy you some new ones," He whispered as he bent down to admire your core, smirking as he watched just how wet you were. 

"You always were so needy for me," He smirked running one finger over your folds making your hips buck for more but he held you in place, 

"If you're a good girl, good things will come." He placed a kiss on your core making you whine out and close your eyes tightly. 

"Please," You practically begged him and so he pushed his tongue into you making your eyes widen at the feeling, it had been so long since you'd had anything nearly as passionate as this. He hummed into your cunt before swirling his tongue inside of you, using his thumb to attack your clit. 

"So fucking wet, you taste so good baby girl," The name made you clench around his two fingers that were buried knuckle deep inside of you. 

"You like that? You like it when I call you baby girl?" He questioned pushing his fingers in and out of you roughly while you whimpered below him not being able to form words from the feeling of him.

"I'm taking that as a yes," He chuckled wickedly before pushing his tongue back into your cunt, moaning into your whenever you'd clench around his tongue. 

"Ugh shit, Jungkook!" You screamed out gripping onto the blanket below you as you came unexpectedly and out of nowhere onto his tongue. Your body slipped leaving you to lay down on the blanket, your ass still in the air just a little, 

"Good girl," He whispered turning you around to face him, you licked your lips as you roughly brought him down into another kiss trying to position him between your legs. You wanted to feel him inside of you, you wanted to feel him filling your walls up the way he used to.

"U-Agh fucking Jesus," Jungkook moaned as he slowly pushed into you, he kept himself steady holding himself in place at your hilt as you tried to adjust to him again. You could feel every inch of him inside of you which already made your head spin at the thought of it. The number of times you'd brought yourself to the edge just thinking about him touching you instead of yourself was never enough. You could never make yourself feel the way he was making you feel right now.

"M-Move," You whispered to him before kissing him roughly again, he followed your orders and began to push in and out of you slowly at first making you moan into his mouth. 

"So tight," He grunted taking your right leg and putting it over his shoulder, the sudden movement making you cry out in pleasure as he hit you deeper than before. 

"T-There, T-There! Right there." You repeated as he continued to hit you at that same spot over and over again making you cry out, you ran your nails down his bare back and he smirked as you clenched with each thrust. 

"That's it, baby, let me feel you do that again." He roughly slammed into you holding himself in place and you screamed out his name rolling your head back and arching your back off the floor. 

"JUNGKOOK!" Nothing could compare to this, he continued to roughly hit into that spot that made your eyes roll back and the fairy lights look like real stars. 

"F-Faster...M-More, need more." You whimpered wanting him to hit that exact spot more and more with each thrust and he moaned back at you as he began to change his pace. Swiftly pushing in and out of you roughly watching the way your head rolled back and you moaned out his name. 

"S-Shit baby, I- I can't keep this up." He admitted as he began rubbing your clit with his thumb and your whole body began to shake, your thighs aching as you could feel the pressing orgasm begin to rise up in your body.

"C-Cum...I-I wanna cum...F-Feel you cum," Your sentence was a mess as were you but you were begging for him to cum and to let you cum. 

"Together?" He whispered while kissing you softly not matching his thrusts which were still rough and quick, you managed to nod while moaning out his name and he smirked feeling you getting closer with him. 

"S-Shit," You cried out as his thumb began to rub your clit in rougher circles, tugging on it a little making you whimper and gasp as your orgasm began to build. The tightness in your stomach grew tighter until you snapped around him, your legs wrapping around his waist to hold him deep inside of you as you came around his length. 

"Jungkook, shit." You whimpered out as he kissed you roughly, cumming into you as you held him deep, your walls clenching around him even after you came down from your high. 

The fireplace was crackling as you laid in front of it, naked and sprawled out beside Jungkook who was sweating from the activities you'd just done again for the sixth time that night. There was one thing playing on your minds though, one lingering thought that neither of you wanted to talk about but had to talk about sooner or later. That was about him going home. Going to Korea.

"We have to talk about something," He whispered as you laid your head down on his sweaty chest nodding along to him, you knew what was coming. 

"I have to go soon...But I don't want this to end...I don't want to be away from you and Areum." The thought had crossed your mind about how this would all work out, being in different countries while you shared a daughter and were hopelessly in love with one another.

"I don't want to be away from you either." You admitted as you looked up into his eyes, resting your chin on his chest as you stared into his eyes. 

"W-Well what- What if you-" You knew what he was trying to say and ask of you and again the thought had crossed your mind, all of the positives about it but then all of the negatives came along with it. 

"Move to Korea?" You questioned to make sure you were on the same page as him. He nodded his head slowly while linking your hands with his and starting at you sadly, 

"I-I wouldn't know how to do that...W-What if things go bad between us what-"

"Ignore the what-ifs, this...This is perfect. What we have it right..." You knew he was right on that part, there was nothing that could happen between you and Jungkook that could break you apart anymore. You were hopelessly in love with him and nothing was ever going to change that.

"I wouldn't know how to move to another country...I-I don't even speak much Korean, how would Areum go to school." You sat up as you panicked thinking about everything but Jungkook took your arms in his hands and shook his head. 

"We can fix that, I can make things work...She can be homeschooled, We can look into visa's and stuff." He whispered trying to reassure you that everything would be okay, the longer he held you the more you knew it was the right thing to do and the more you thought that nothing could go wrong with this, with him by your side. 

"I suppose there are lots of huge book stores in Korea I could get a job in..." He smiled brightly as he heard you calming down and began to talk about what you could do there. You'd always expressed your love for travelling and you'd never been before.

"I-I'll have to talk to Areum about it and Grace...I'll need to find someone that will take the shop..." You began planning out what was going to happen in your head but Jungkook just brought you into a soft and loving kiss as he pulled you close to him again. 

"Everything will work out, I promise." He whispered as he leant down to kiss you once again, running his hands up your sides as he got excited over the thought of getting to live out the rest of his life with you.

A/n: This fic was super short and sweet but I hope you guys enjoyed it!  Thank you to those who took the time to read it! I hope you can enjoy any future works I aim to put out 🥰💞 It will probably be a while until my next series as I’m working on a Stray Kids Minho one!

MASTERLIST || PREVIOUS || EPILOGUE

Tagline: @lyoongx @mitzwinchester @fan-ati--c @taestannie @kneel-begyourpardon @rjsmochii @bisexualmess007​ @innersooya​ @sw33tnight​ @sweeneyblue1​ @jin-from-the-block​ @neverthefirstchoice​ @jikooksgirl19​ @jungkooksseuphoria​ @queenmasterxx​ @oosnapitskat​ @janieooo​ @preciouschimine​    @koremis​ @keijilovebot​ @silscintilla​ @mayafravoli

[peachnewt]

Midnight Snack - Time Slips By

On September 15th, 2009, I posted the first chapter in the Getting In Deep series; Man on the Inside Part 1. This year, I completely forgot. Plague years have not been kind to my writing brain, but I wanted to do something to commemorate and thank everyone that's been sticking with me through the years. Whether you've been around since '09 or you just found the Getting In Deep series yesterday, I hope you enjoy this little snippet. ^_^

Thank you all for being here. Here's to eventually seeing these two lovable idiots get their happy ending!

This is a purely self indulgent midnight snack, no real vore happens though it is implied. And it is heavily implied that Will and Louis dabble in a bit of roleplay in the bedroom, though there is nothing further than kissing on the page. Enjoy!

Louis understood time had rules and scientific laws that others comprehended much better than him. He still cursed how time eluded him; tick-tocks vanishing like vapor when they were supposed to mark the hour, minute, second. Date. Even Reese occasionally messing with the insides of clocks and wristwatches at his desk hadn't been enough to give Louis warning that he was missing something in the cycle of the year.

But Louis figured something was wrong when Will brushed him off during a case that ate away at their free time and sleep.

"Can you get your own coffee?" snapped Will. "I need this report done yesterday."

Louis huffed and walked to the break room with his barren mug. He'd get a cup of tea for Will while he was at it, maybe then he'd cool off.

Of course the coffee maker was empty. No one else considered the caffeine needs of others. Barbarians.

He filled the coffee maker, and waited, eyeing the new signs HR had put up in the break room. He didn't know if they were supposed to be inspirational, or menacing.

Hang in there.

We are a TEAM!

Where were you five years ago? Where will you be five years from now?

Five years ago I was ending my tour, thought Louis. I would never have imagined doing this. Hell, three years ago I would never have imagined weekly shrink tests and going down my partner's throat on a regular basis.

The aroma of percolating coffee filled the break room, stimulating Louis memory.

And two years ago I was in...

And Louis remembered the event that started all the weirdness in his life. And a few of the good things too.

Two years and two days ago.

That was how long it had been since Louis and Will came to a whole new understanding with each other. And Louis plain forgot. No wonder Will had been acting as coarse as rock salt.

Anniversaries weren't something Louis did or thought about. Mostly because he hadn't been with anyone long enough to count anniversaries. But for Will...

Okay. I fucked up.

Louis grabbed a fresh cup of coffee and started the hot water for Will's tea.

New mission; unfuck up.

***

Louis didn't do romance often, but he could make it up on the fly. Will had to stay an hour late to run his report by Cetz and a few others. He could do something in the hour it took for Will to get back to his apartment.

Right?

Louis bought four packages of Peppermint patties and a leftover bouquet of tired daisies from a corner store. Flowers and chocolate, check. He let himself into Will's apartment with the spare key and laid a line of the individually wrapped mints from the door to the bedroom. He searched the far desk for the container full of the "dice geek" stuff. Bingo, a giant box full of fake tea lights. Romantic ambiance without the chance of a sudden fire. It was a good idea until he realized half the batteries in the lights were dead and he had to get more.

Could he afford to leave and get batteries? No. He called in reinforcements.

"Beni, can you come over to Will's with a package of triple As?"

"Do I want to know?"

Louis hefted the fourth untouched bag of mints in his hand. "I have candy." Translation: MOVE!

"Be there in eight minutes!"

Help on the way, good. He might need it for the next part.

Louis opened Will's second closet, the closet full of things almost as Don't Touch as Will's Star Wars shrine, picked the challenge of the night, prayed for forgiveness, and got to work.

***

Fifty minutes, and much cursing at fabric and buckles later, the door to the apartment creaked open. Louis dropped the last candle, grabbed the bouquet of flowers, and launched himself onto Will's bed, yards of cloth flapping around him.

Will cursed as he kicked something small at the doorway. "What the--?"

Follow the trail, Fanboy, Louis mentally urged while awkwardly trying to figure out how to lay seductively on the bed while drowning in so much freaking fabric. Jeeze, why is the hood so huge?

"Who-- Louis?" called Will, puzzled.

"In here," called Louis. "No lights please." I don't need to shrink the moment I kinda got this right. Okay, this laying on the bed like a gift ain't working. Should I stand? I should stand holding the flowers. Could be holding one of the light sabers but I know Will would kill me if I touched them. I- Holy crap, I can't even get up wearing this thing!

Before Louis could get to his feet, the door slowly swung open. Will entered and froze one step inside, holding the cheap chocolate peppermints he'd gathered. The soft glow of fake flickering lights bounced off the dark polished wood of the desk and bed like golden fireflies. Something soft and instrumental echoed from the stereo.

And on Will's bed lay Louis clothed head to booted feet in Will's Jedi Master robes.

"Happy late anniversary," Louis mustered.

Will stood frozen, mouth slack. "You..."

"It wasn't until today that I realized I completely forgot our anniversary two days ago. So this is me trying to make up for it."

Will gulped, eyes still wide. "I see."

He definitely looks surprised, hopefully pleased and not pissed that I touched his costumes. Okay legs over the edge and.... up we go. Oh, these boots are a bit too small. Ouch. "You gotta be at least a little impressed that I got most of this getup on by myself. There are ties and eyelets and layers and stuff." He didn't need to mention he'd needed Beni's help to get the belt on before he shooed her away with the rest of the candy.

Will stood there, shocked and awkward, like someone that walked into the wrong surprise birthday party.

"Will?" asked Louis, an inkling of what was wrong.

"Hm? Yeah?" Will's eyes shot up from looking at the folds of the long brown robe that flowed around Louis like heavy smoke. His cheeks burned. "Sorry. You laying there dressed in... My mind just rebooted and-"

Louis' hands went to his hips in indignation. "You have no idea what anniversary I'm talking about, do you?"

"No," admitted Will. "I'm sorry! If I had remembered I would have gotten you something nice!"

Louis paced started pacing, the long robe billowing behind him. "I've been racking my brain wondering why you've been so pissy lately. I thought I forgot something important."

"No! It's the case Cetz gave me. He wants me to work it on my own and I'm getting nowhere even with Watch Three input." Will pouted. "It was a bunch of little things making me mad, not you."

Louis huffed and stilled, the robes coming to a stop a few seconds after he did. "And you're not mad I'm wearing one of your costumes?"

"You're forgiven. And this is very nice," said Will, stepping closer. "The candles are beautiful, I'll be enjoying the chocolates for a long while, and you look absolutely gorgeous in those robes."

"How gorgeous?" edge Louis, back straightening under the praise. He needed the ego boost after the stress of the day.

"Majestic. Glorious." Will smiled, put the peppermint chocolates down on the dresser, and inched closer. He grasped the edge of the hood draping around Louis shoulders and lifted it up to crown Louis' head. "Mysterious. Powerful."

Will pulled the hood and Louis closer, lifting up on his toes and tilting his face to press a kiss to the mouth in shadow. Louis' lips lifted at the difference a one-inch heel made, and then tilted his face to the side to kiss a touch deeper. Will tasted of peppermint; probably eaten in the journey from door to bedroom. The fume of mint and dark chocolate filled the scant air between them.

When their lips parted, both were smiling. Will wrapped his arms around Louis' waist under the outer robe while the long sleeves dangling from Louis' arms enveloped Will's shoulders like bat wings. Whatever confusion or mistake between them had evaporated in the meeting of lips and mint.

"How do you even keep the hood in place?" asked Louis.

"Hair clips in the lining." Will leaned closer, chest to chest. His mouth quirked in a sheepish tilt. "I'm terrible with dates. I can barely remember my own twin sister's birthday. Can you remind me what we are celebrating?"

Hell, I ain't making this easy for him. "Guess."

"Uh, first time I met you?"

"Try again."

"Can't be our first date, that was in Winter."

"That true."

"First case?"

"Close."

Will's mental capacity was still in reboot mode from seeing Louis in full Jedi robes. "I give up."

"September 15th. The date of the Freewill raid. The first time I was inside you." Louis' hand drifted down from Will's shoulder to his stomach. "The first time I had to rely on you completely. And, if memory serves, that night you confessed that you liked me."

"Oh." Will's mouth curved into a smile, and his whole body curved towards Louis, warmed by the sentiment. "I would have thought getting you coffee every day and smiling at you was an indicator of liking you."

"Yeah, well I wasn't the most attentive partner until you said it verbally. That's what I'm counting."

"So Freewill is our anniversary. I can get behind that," agreed Will.

They slowly made their way to sit on the bed, Louis gathering the flowers that had fallen from the bouquet, and Will gathering the chocolates to share between them.

"So... I didn't forget our anniversary," said Louis around a mint. "But you didn't even realize we had one."

"Like I said, bad with dates." Will bashfully reached out to the hood of the long brown Jedi robe draped over Louis. "Does that mean you're not going to wear this anymore?"

Louis grinned. "The point of the costume was for you to take it off." He edged the collar aside with a thumb, flashing bare skin. "What do you want to do tonight?"

Will's eyes glimmered in the gold-light. A child with a new toy. "Anything?"

"Within reason."

"Maybe... roleplay?"

Louis hummed and nodded his head. He could do improv, especially if it lead to a happy ending.

"So... Jedi and Rouge?" mused Will. "I can get the Han Solo costume on real quick. Or the Hutt Slayer costume, but that will take some time to put on and maybe some double sided tape. I-"

Louis put a hand over Will's mouth and stilled his overly creative mind going fifteen directions at once. He didn't want to wait for a costume change; he knew how long one of those could get. "How about Jedi warrior fell to earth and needs more force energy. Luckily there is a nerdy earthling full of it."

"That's not how the force works," Will said, muffled.

Louis ignored him. "So he persuades the earthling to share. To save his life. It's a long process." Louis leaned in, bringing Will's face into the shadow of the hood, and then brushed his lips along the hinge of Will's jaw. He trailed a hand down from its place over Will's mouth, over trembling throat and chest, until it rested below Will's sternum. "It might even involve going inside the earthling, right into his core, to get what he needs."

Will gulped hard, caught in the image as deftly as Louis caught him in his arms and robes.

"So, what do you think?" asked Louis.

"Let me splash some water on my face and we can start. Same rules as before?"

Louis grinned. "Always."

***

Will woke overly warm and worn out under the wool Jedi robe. The bed lay in the golden glow of tea lights running their batteries and the dawn cracking through the window shades. He flicked the robe aside and turned from his side to his back, groaning at the lingering ache. Bits and pieces of Will's prized Jedi Master costume lay around the bedroom, part of the belt hanging from the headboard.

Last night had lasted hours, playing earthling and Jedi. One of Will's deepest fantasies come true. If only he could get Louis to join him at a convention wearing the robes.

Louis mumbled in his ear through the SkySprecht. One of the many rules they obeyed when adventurous in bed.

He'd have to take the robe to the dry-cleaner later, but after last night...

Will stretched, smiling at the small weight shifting inside his core.

Worth it.

"Happy Anniversary, Louis."

------

If you enjoyed this short, consider buying me a ko-fi!  

[narrans]

Everyone needs a little Hero | A “Little” Perspective

The day was a stormy one. Without windows, the Borrower colony wouldn’t have been able to tell except for the faint thunder muffled by the walls and the flickering of lights in their own homes. Thankfully, Borrowers were often overprepared for emergencies, so other forms of light kept their homes bright and warm.

Hero knew there wasn’t much he could do for the humans when it came to the flickering lights, but that didn’t stop him from wanting to check on his friends and the other people in the building. His siblings were all working on various tasks, particularly preparing for winter even though it was months away.

His oldest siblings, Atlas and Cali, were currently working with some thick yarn to make new comforters for themselves and any new family who may be moving into the apartment. His father, Casper, was taking stock of their supplies and planning what to use before it spoiled while his mother, Prim, went out borrowing with Tiron, Hero’s next oldest brother. Winnie, the youngest, simply sat on the arm crocheted comforter Atlas and Cali were working on.

Hero helped his father for a few hours before being dismissed to clean his room. Thankfully, the young Borrower had already gone through and tidied up the night before. He even double checked his lines and hooks, wanting to avoid another accident like what happened when he was with Sam. Admittedly, things could have been a lot worse and, if Hero was being honest with himself, the experience was a scary one, but not something he would turn down. Sam had been so gentle and careful – not only with him but with keeping his secret.

Still, Hero wanted to at least pretend he was following the Borrower rules and try to keep to the shadows during his hero work. Heroes didn’t need praise for their work after all. After slipping on his borrowing pack and checked his equipment, Hero set out. He had almost made it to the door when he heard his father call out for him.

“Hero? Where are you off to?” Hero felt his heart leap into his throat. His family hadn’t questioned his comings and goings before, and he didn’t want to lie to his father of all things. He turned around, now seeing his siblings were also paying attention to the young Borrower’s answer and thought up a genuine answer as fast as his mind could concoct.

“I was going to get some more batteries for my side light and some of the other lights in the house. Mine are running low and mom said something about grabbing some while she was out with Tiron,” replied Hero. While this answer seemed to appease the family, there was an added second where they watched his reaction. Were they suspicious of him? Had they noticed something odd? Couldn’t be! At least, Hero thought he was being careful around his family.

“Well, be careful; and try to avoid the fifth floor. There’s a human woman who has some… interesting habits. Your mother and I went to check it out. I don’t think it’s anything dangerous, but it’s suspicious,” said Casper. Hero nodded and smiled thoughtfully.

“Yes sir,” he chirped before spinning on his heel and heading out into the walls.

The fifth floor? A strange woman? Why? What makes her strange? There are some pretty weird humans out there; but, then again, couldn’t the same be said about us? We do live in the walls after all. Hero shook his head as he focused on the task at hand. Don’t think about that now. If dad and mom are concerned about it, then I definitely should be – at least for now. Let’s see what’s higher up on the floors. I remember seeing batteries on one of the human’s desks. I wonder if they’re still there.

Rather than turning left or right, Hero ventured straight to the lines that ran up and down the majority of the walls that towered above him. He was just about there when he heard another muffled clap of thunder. Human footsteps were loud more often than not, but thunder sounded like an immense giant slamming into the ground. The thought of a sentient creature larger than a human stomping about and making such a ruckus made him shiver, but he couldn’t think about that now. Now, the young hero had to climb the line and needed to focus.

Hand over hand, foot hold after foot hold, he scaled up one floor, then the next after a break and then one after that. Winded, he paused at the top and waited for his heart to stop pounding so hard before walking back through the halls and floor joists. There were only a few families who lived on this floor, and they often kept to themselves, so Hero didn’t see anyone while he walked along.

The light at his side flickered and dimmed. The bright-eyed Borrower had made the excuse of needing batteries to go out, but he didn’t realize that his side lamp was so close to dimming. He quickened his pace to the apartment entrance, a floorboard knot that acted as a trap door, and ascended the ladder. The sounds of thunder and the natural sounds of the apartment seemed to be the only things Hero could hear. He held his breath and opened the trap knot and listened again. Again, only the natural sounds of the apartment.

Most likely, the human wasn’t home, which was a good sign. Hero lifted himself up, noticing he was under some sort of bookcase and that the desk had moved from the corner of the room to a space by the window and the couch. All of the lights were off and the only additional source of luminance were the candles on the desk and tables.

Is the power out? No, couldn’t be. The refrigerator is still humming. Just for fun? Hard to imagine a human sitting in the dark just for fun. Hero crept out of the shadows, turning his side lamp off, and hurried along the edge of the wall, then dashed to the coffee table and the couch before pausing to prepare his hook.

As he checked his hook and line, he noticed something by the edge of the desk. It was a bag, like a backpack. It wasn’t that he hadn’t seen a backpack before. In fact, Hero preferred them over side satchels any day because they were easier to run with. What caught the Borrower’s eye about the backpack were the patches and buttons on it. They weren’t just any buttons. These looked like massive clothing buttons just about as tall as Hero, and something was odd about the patches.

Hero checked his surroundings, keeping his senses open, and walked up to the backpack. He was right. There was something odd about the patches – they were fake. The backpack itself didn’t appear to have any holes in it and the buttons themselves looked handmade. It almost looked like his own backpack, except the patches on Hero’s bag were because he actually needed them. With an odd look to the bag, he headed off to the desk.

Why would a human have this? wondered Hero as he made his way around to one of the desk legs and began swinging his hook. Once. Twice. Thrice. Zing! The hook flew from his hand, carrying the line with it. It clattered against the edge of the table and slid off. Hero had to run to catch the hook so it didn’t clatter as it hit the ground. Try again. He encouraged himself silently. He began swinging his hook again. Once. Twice. Thrice. Zing! This time, the hook barely caught the edge of the wooden table. Hero tried his weight on it a few times before ascending the line.

Every time he glanced down to make sure he had the right footing, his keen, bright green eyes caught sight of the backpack and he wasn’t sure why. It was almost unsettling how similar it looked to a borrowing bag. Hero’s fingers finally found the edge of the table and, arms and legs shaking slightly, he rolled up on top of the desk and crouched, finding the nearest thing he could hide behind which was a cup of pencils and brushes.

The little Borrower had just made it to his hiding place when a streak of lightening burst through the sky so bright it cast his shadow. The blinding light was followed by an explosion of sound so loud Hero had to cover his ears. Perhaps I should’ve waited to come out. I hope Sam and Maggie are okay. Do they get scared of storms too?

Hero knew he needed to go check on them, but the batteries came first. He checked one more time before stepping out onto the open in search of the batteries. This was the first time Hero had a clear view of the desk. There was a closed computer (Sam explained how they worked) off to the side as well as a couple of other strange rectangular boxes with buttons on them. Hero recognized the triangle play button, but wasn’t sure what the red dot meant. There was the cup of pencils and brushes he was hiding behind, but beyond that was some sort of small drawers with erasers, paints, and other supplies.

In the center of the desk was a book with drawings on it, but Hero was more interested in the small drawers – particularly in the top drawer which looked like it had what he was looking for. Now, he just needed to get into it.

First things first, he decided to climb up onto the drawers. He couldn’t pry it open and get into it if he couldn’t reach. With a quick roll of his shoulders, Hero grasped the plastic edges and, like a ladder, climbed up the side until he reached the top. The sandy brown-haired boy had just leaned over the edge and began pulling at the drawer when the drawing in the sketchbook caught his eye. The black and white pencil sketch took him by such surprise that he had to stand and tilt his head around to make sure he wasn’t seeing things.

The sketch was of a person, which wasn’t the alarming part. The alarming part was the improvised pin sword at their side and the patchwork clothing they wore. The alarming part was the stitched bag and the fact the figure looked like there was a hook and string in their hands.

The sketch was that of a Borrower.

Hero felt a surge of energy course through his body, ears ringing and feeling slightly light-headed. This person had drawn a Borrower, and accurately if Hero was honest. The Borrower boy abandoned his quest to retrieve the batteries from the top drawer and climbed back down hurriedly to get a better view of the sketch.

The drawing was shaded, though the eyes still looked a little cartoonish, but the other fine details matched piece for piece. There were a few elements that seemed a little odd to him though, such as the furry ears and mouse-like tails, but who was Hero to question what a human thought they saw. Hero tried to recall if the Borrower looked like anyone he knew and, thankfully, the answer was no. Still, what would inspire a human to draw something like this? Did this person know about Borrowers? Had they been talking to someone? Were there other drawings?

Curiosity overtook the Borrower’s mind as he walked to the edge of the page and lifted, being careful to not bend or tare the paper. Sure enough, there were other sketches. There was a variation of elements such as clothing style, age, and gender. All of them had furry ears and tails, sometimes furry feet too. The scenes were different too. In some of the pictures, the Borrowers were with a human, being held or carried or simply just talking.

Hero had nearly lost himself in the artwork when he heard a door open and close. The Borrower nearly jumped out of his skin as he scrambled out from between the sketchbook pages and made a mad dash for the pencil cup. Just because they’re drawing Borrowers doesn’t mean they won’t try to keep me. Maybe that’s how they learned how to draw us. Oh no. What if they try and keep me?

Hero hoped that he wasn’t noticed but had scrambled out of sight in such a hurry that he didn’t push the sketchbook pages back to the original picture. He covered his nose and mouth to stifle his heavy breathing when he heard something thud against the ground and a curious hum. The footsteps approached, faltering before arriving fully at the desk.

“What the…” The sounds of that soft exclamation from what sounded like a boy made Hero’s heart skip a beat. There were a few more footsteps which ominously paired with another bolt of lightening and a crack of thunder. Hero didn’t need to see the human to know he was to Hero’s left.

It suddenly hit him. Hero had left his hook and line at the edge of the table, and a quick glance to his left confirmed that the boy had found his line as he saw a hand letting the thread run across his palm. There were sounds of shuffling and pages turning.

Then, out of nowhere, the boy started talking in a low, soft voice. “Hello. Um… I don’t know if you’re here or not, but I hope you know I’m not going to hurt you. That’s probably not much consolation, but… well… I don’t know… saying out loud sometimes helps.” Hero leaned against the pencil jar, working up the courage to try and say something – anything.

“I’m Watney,” said the boy as the sound of footsteps retreated from the desk. “Do you have a name? Ug… silly me. Of course you probably have a name. Idiot.” The last part of the sentence seemed to be directed at himself.

Hero wondered what he was supposed to say. What could he say? Should he say anything? He didn’t have time as Watney continued talking.

“Um… do you like the drawings? I’m… assuming you did. Or did they bother you. I’m sorry if that’s the case,” said Watney. Hero finally managed to get his breathing under control and his thoughts in order.

If this Watney guy knows about Borrowers, then he should have an idea about the rules and be willing to answer some questions about how he knows about us. If that’s the case, he won’t want to keep me. I have to find out how he knows about us. If he’s telling other people, then we’re in trouble – danger even. I need to make sure he’s not telling anyone. It’ll be okay. He didn’t take my line and I have my things. I can do this.

Watney sighed and sounded like he was heading for the kitchen when Hero peered around the jar and stepped out. The subtle motion instantly caught the boy’s eyes. To Hero, the boy looked to be around his oldest brother’s age if not a little older. He had auburn hair and pale blue eyes that, in an instant, seemed to absorb Hero’s entire frame.

“Woah…” The exhalation of Watney took on the single word, sending an instinctual shiver down Hero’s spine. Still, Hero forced himself to smile, remembering that he may not be helping a human – but he was helping his whole race of people.

“Hello,” greeted Hero, admittedly sounding more bashful than he wanted. He cleared his throat and straightened up before continuing. “It’s nice to meet you Watney. My name is Hero.” Rather than approach, Watney crouched at an impressively slow pace and sat on the ground so he could still partially see Hero while also maintaining, what Hero thought to be, a safe distance.

“Wow,” the auburn-haired boy was obviously trying to form words while his brain was visibly malfunctioning. “I mean… gosh. Sorry. That was rude of me. Yeah… um… nice to meet you too. You said your name is Hero? That’s an awesome name.” Watching the flustered boy was admittedly amusing; and Hero couldn’t help but chuckle to himself, but also be slightly confused. Watney clearly was drawing Borrowers, granted with some altered features such as the ears and tails; but, if he knew about them, why was he acting so flustered?

“Thanks,” said Hero, daring to take a few more steps closer to the partially opened book. “Um… Watney? Have you… ever seen someone like me?” Hero was careful not to mention Borrowers by name. For all the young hero knew, this was something that Watney thought he came up with himself.

“What? Like you? No, but I’m not surprised. You’re not supposed to be seen or known about, right?” The question hit Hero like a gut punch, and his confusion must’ve been apparent because Watney continued. “Sorry. You’re probably breaking all of the rules just to talk to me. Gosh! Sorry! I’m such an idiot. You’ve got to be freaking out.”

Hero felt his confusion growing more and more. Watney hadn’t met a Borrower before, but he knew about the rules? He had some idea of how Hero was feeling?

“How do you know about the rules? Do you… know what I am?” asked the young Borrower, daring to take a few more steps out onto the desk to get a better view of Watney.

Watney, who had partially averted his gaze, glanced back up at Hero before responding. “Well… I mean, yeah. You’re a Little, right?” Hero felt a wave of confusion pour itself into his already charged and muddled brain.

“A little what?” asked Hero.

“No. I mean… yeah, you’re little, but you’re also a Little. You know? Part of the book series?” prompted Watney. Hero felt his head swirl.

“Wait… there are books?” asked Hero.

“Yeah. They’re by some guy named John Peterson. He wrote them ages ago, but they’re about little people who live in the walls with mouse-like tails and improvised clothes. They go on adventures and aren’t supposed to be seen or talk to humans. You’ve never heard of this?” The more Watney explained, the more worried Hero got; but, at the same time, he felt an excitement flutter in him.

If humans know about these books, then they’ll know what we’re worried about. They’ll know that we’re smart just like them and maybe, just maybe, they won’t try to capture us. This might actually be a good thing, right?

Hero remembered Watney had asked a question and hurriedly shook his head.

“No, I’ve never heard of them. But, if it makes you feel better, you’re right about the other things. Humans aren’t supposed to know about us and, if possible, we’re not supposed to talk to you if we are seen. I… hope you can promise you won’t say anything to anyone about this; right?” Hero tried to sound friendly and inviting, knowing that his whole world still depended on a handful of humans keeping their interactions and his species a secret.

“Yeah, no. Absolutely. Lips sealed. You have my word,” said Watney, a smile on his slightly freckled face. There were a few moments of silence before Watney awkwardly cleared his throat and continued. “Um… so… I know it would be rude if I asked what you are and everything, but could I ask you something different? Well, more like an observation?”

Seeing that Watney seemed to understand more than most humans, he couldn’t really see the harm in answering a few observations. He nodded, his sandy brown hair bobbing up and down, falling slightly into his eyes.

“Neat! Um… well, it’s a little awkward, but you don’t actually have a… tail or fluffy ears, do you?” asked Watney. Hero felt a genuine smile tug onto his face as he shook his head.

“No, I don’t have a tail or fluffy ears,” replied Hero. “I noticed that with all of your drawings. They’re really good by the way. You’re really talented.” Watney seemed to straighten up at this complement.

“Thanks, but I’m nowhere near as good as other artists,” he said dismissively.

“Hey, don’t doubt yourself,” encouraged Hero. “Considering you’re going off of what these books you talked about describe, you’ve got a lot of good details.” Watney smiled again and shrugged.

“Well, thanks,” said the auburn-haired human. “Hey, do you mind if I ask you about, like, suggestions? You know. Are the packs and tools okay?” Hero nodded.

“Everything that I would usually bring with me. Though it is a little dark, so I bring this little side lamp,” confirmed the Borrower. At this, he remembered why he originally came out and ventured into this apartment. “Actually, Watney, would you mind if I borrowed some batteries? My light is running low, and I don’t think it’ll last the journey home.”

“Oh, yeah! Of course! Um… is it okay if I get closer?” asked Watney who was already in the process of standing up, hesitating for Hero’s go-ahead.

“Sure, absolutely. You’re the one helping me,” said Hero. “Thank you.” Watney stepped forward, keeping his movements slow and obvious like he were moving in slow-motion and opened the drawer.

“What kind do you need?” asked the auburn artist.

“Um… the round kind?” In all honesty, Hero didn’t know there were so many different kinds of batteries. He knew what they looked like and which ones worked, but not what kind they were. Watney fished out a literal handful of different batteries and laid them on the desk a few inches from where Hero stood. The Borrower’s eyes widened, knowing this many batteries undoubtedly would power their home for several months. Still, he couldn’t bring all of them home. He found a couple disks for his side lamp and one of the bigger kind, called AA, and slipped them into his bag.

“Thank you so much. This really helps,” said Hero.

“Anytime Hero,” said Watney. “Hey, um… if it’s not weird or anything, do you think I could draw some sketches of you?” Hero had to think about it for a moment before making up his mind.

“Um… as long as you don’t make them look too much like me it should be okay. Remember, w… er… I’m supposed to be a secret. If you do, just… make sure you close your book when you’re done?” The request seemed to be a reasonable one and it thrilled Watney.

“Awesome! Well, you’re welcome back anytime little man. Oof… sorry. Was that weird?” asked Watney. Hero smiled and chuckled.

“No, it wasn’t weird… big guy… Hm… maybe it is weird.” The joke, seemingly well received, left the two boys laughing for a few seconds, before Hero elected to make his exit. Watney seemed like he wanted to offer Hero a literal hand but was showing tremendous self-restraint as he watched Hero descend the line.

Watney waved good-bye, knowing Hero wouldn’t want to show where the hidden entrance to the walls was, and stepped into his room. Hero waited until he heard the door click before heading back to the bookshelf.

This new information about “Littles” opened up a whole new world of possibilities for the young Borrower. If humans already knew about little people living in the walls and weren’t already setting traps, maybe Hero was right all along and humans weren’t always capturing, rampaging, and trapping Borrowers. Maybe, just maybe, they were also being let go and befriending the giants they lived with.

Continue

Previous

Beginning

Prologue

~~~~~special thanks to What1do1i1name1meXD on Wattpad for the idea of Hero meeting someone from the g/t community~~~~~

[purplesurveys]

1271

survey by lets-make-surveys

1 - When was the last time you were at the beach? What did you do there? 2019. It was a daytrip with a few friends, and for the most part we had just sat by the sand and then taken dips in the water whenever we felt like it. We went when there was supposed to be a typhoon entering the city so the resort was literally empty. Anyway, it was a spur-of-the-moment thing that would’ve been such a fun and wholesome memory in my head if not for the fact that my ex tagged along for that trip.

2 - When was the last time you updated your profile picture somewhere? What is your current photo of? A week or so ago, I think? I had had a few drinks and tipsy-me changed my profile photo to something goofy; by the time I woke up the next day I just changed it right back to the profile picture I had before the change.

3 - Who was the last person you spoke to online? How do you know this person? Someone from HR since I did a minor booboo on the website where we have to clock in and out, and I was asking how I could help fix it.

4 - When was the last time you got a blister on your foot? A fewwww months ago, I wanna say? I remember struggling when I recently bought a pair of adidas sneakers.

5 - What was the last reason for taking painkillers? Did they work to make you feel better? I only ever take painkillers for my headaches. Yeah, they always work.

6 - Which do you prefer - Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr or TikTok? Ooh idk. I enjoy each of them for different reasons, but I guess I’ll go with Facebook since I never run out of funny content/memes over there. TikTok I like too but then again all the TikTok clips I run into are on Facebook anyway.

7 - If you drive, how much does it cost for you to fill your car up? If we’re going from a nearly-empty tank, I think it takes roughly around P1500 to fill it up, or roughly $30.

8 - When was the last time you walked over five miles in one day? Maybe last July when I went to the mall with friends. I remember doing quite a lot of walking that day and I’m sure the total distance was more than five miles.

9 - What's your favourite brand of ice-cream and which flavour from that brand do you like best? I don’t really like ice cream, but I guess the yummiest I’ve had are Aice’s coffee ice cream and Ben & Jerry’s chocolate chip cookie dough.

10 - Are you a fan of scented candles? If so, what kind of scents do you like the most? I am a fan, but it’s not something I’m obsessed with enough to buy for myself. I’ve gotten scented candles as gifts and I can live off of those alone, lol. As for scents, I like ocean-y or sweet ones, like cinnamon.

11 - What did you order the last time you went out for a meal? The last time I went out for a meal...I think that was Taco Bell. I got one of their burritos and some deep-fried side, but I don’t remember which one it was. But right now I literally also just placed an order from KFC; I got a Double Down (FINALLY), and two orders of Fun Shots – one for me and another for the delivery guy as a way to thank him for taking my order at midnight. 

12 - Who was the last person to visit your house? What were they there for? Ooh we haven’t received visitors in a while. I wanna say the last guests were still Angela and Hans, from the time we watched Sowoozoo together.

13 - If you could change one thing about your appearance, what would it be and why? I’d fix my teeth so I can finally feel entirely confident when smiling.

14 - How many miles/km's do you drive/walk on an average day? LOL like 0.5. I’m always at home.

15 - What's more annoying, a stone in your shoe or an eyelash in your eye? STONE IN SHOE. It hurts like hell and I have to stop whatever I’m doing to get it out, too.

16 - Do you get your groceries delivered or do you prefer to go the store yourself to pick them? I don’t do the family’s groceries but when I’m craving a snack or need toiletries for myself or whatever, I order online.

17 - How many surveys would you say you take a week, on average? Probably like 5 or 6. I only ever get to take them during the weekends now, but occasionally I’ll get to sneak in one or two in the middle of the week.

18 - What percentage is your phone battery on right now? 76%.

19 - What have you had to eat/drink so far today? Are you planning to have anything else before you go to bed? I had chicken fillet with rice for dinner, andddd that’s all I had for today haha. Right now I’m just waiting for my order to arrive. I do feel bad for giving into a craving but I’m trying to justify it by saying, 1) I literally sponsored three birthdays in the last two weeks, 2) this work week had been particularly been brutal, and 3) the Double Down is a limited-time offer thing so best to get it before it randomly disappears again for the next like three years. 

20 - Have you ever donated to anyone's GoFundMe before? I don’t think so, no. But I’ve shared links.

21 - Have you ever won money on a scratch-card or lottery ticket? What did you spend it on? Nope.

22 - What was the last reason for you to leave your house? I went to Angela’s house for her birthday last Wednesday.

23 - Assuming you had all the money, space and knowledge necessary, what animal(s) would you love to keep as a pet? I’d still choose a dog.

24 - How many times a week do you get takeaway food/drink? I try not to make it into a habit. I get food delivery probably only once or twice a month.

25 - Are there any pets in the room you're in right now? What are they doing? Nope. Both dogs are downstairs.

26 - What was the last thing you took a photo off? Did you upload it onto social media anywhere? Yeah, Anj gave me Taehyung’s Persona postcard. Funny story about that; she had kept pushing it onto me but I vehemently refused because it’s her merch, until she finally said, “it’s fake, just take it” for me to take the bait. A day later she messaged me saying, “by the way the postcard’s an original” :------) Anyway after that I took a photo and uploaded it so I can thank her.

27 - How long have you know the friend you've known the longest? It’s 16 years this year.

28 - Have you ever had a job where you had to wear a uniform? No. We have a dress code, but no uniform.

29 - What time do you tend to get up/go to bed on a weekday? 8:30 AM/1 or 2 AM.

30 - What's your soda/soft drink of choice? I don’t like soda and I try to remain un-into it, but I tried Pepsi a few months ago and actually liked it, so I guess we can go with that.

[megers67]

A Quiet Surprise

I think after seeing leaks for the upcoming chapter, we could all use a little fluff.

--------------------

When Shouta walked in through the door late that evening, he had a moment of slight panic, running through all the significant dates that were carefully cataloged in his head, but came up with nothing. The small apartment that he shared with Hizashi was dominated by an elaborate blanket and furniture structure. It seemed to take up the entire space, organically subdivided into different 'rooms' and lit by a combination of fairy lights, the standing lamps they already had and the fake battery-powered candles that Hizashi had salvaged from a sale in a moment of weakness. 

The stunned man just stood there, baffled. Then a blond head popped up like a meerkat from the general vicinity of where the TV should be. No telling if that was even still the case right now. He seemed surprised to see his partner at the door.

"Oh! Shou! You're back!" Hizashi was beaming.

After a moment, Shouta finally found some words. "It's 3 in the morning."

Mic held up a finger to ask for a second. He disappeared beneath the blankets once more then re-emerged at the entrance of the structure just in front of Aizawa. He couldn't stand, so he sat there cross-legged. Eraser squatted down to match his gaze. 

"I know, I know." Mic shrugged off, casually. "I just kind of realized that we've been so busy lately that we haven't been able to actually spend time together."

"We work together though."

"You know that isn't the same, Shou."

And he did. It was like they had only merely existed in the same space for months. Their schedules were so packed that they weren't able to do anything. Any mutual free time they had, they were too exhausted to take advantage of.

He looked at Hizashi. And really truly looked. He saw the bags under the eyes, the hair that was only halfway through the usual routine to deconstruct the infamous upswoop, the fact that he was still wearing the undershirt that he wore with his costume. Mic must have started this shortly after he got home. For them. 

Aizawa may be tired himself, and they may regret this in the morning, but he wouldn't refuse this for all the riches in the world. A soft smile crossed his face. The kind that only Hizashi deserved to see. "When can we start the tour?"

--------------------

Time is a funny thing. 

You get so so bogged down in your work and the daily grind that you look up and it has suddenly been half a year since you last really looked around you.

But then there are moments that passed by so impossibly slow that you can feel the air about it seep into your very skin and taking root. 

And as Hizashi and Shouta cuddled in front of what was surely a fire hazard of a TV set up watching the kind of programming that only appeared in the wee hours, it was both.

[thegreatestofheck]

Bares Bones {Theory 3} ⋇ Pope Heyward ⋇

find my complete masterlist and the first three parts here!

description: Pippa Cantu has always been a little…strange. With a knack for knowing everything there is to know about every conspiracy, every mystery, and every weird happening, she doesn’t have much time (or desire) for friends. But when her chemistry lab partner asks her to join him and his friends on a hunt for the Royal Merchant, she just can’t say no.

chapter summary: a gift is given and a discovery is made. Pippa starts to realize that the pogues are expecting something from her that she can’t give. 

word count - 5.9k 

warnings - light swearing, mentions of blood

a/n - So, I’m trying to figure out how to make this different from Ocean and Alcohol, since I went through many of the same scenes. I hope it’s different enough that yall don’t feel like you’re just reading the same story again haha. Also, I know there isn’t a lot about Pope and Pippa in this chapter, i’m sorry. Anyway, hope yall like it and thank you for your love and support!!

***

It was more than awkward walking back to the Wreck with just JJ. Pippa had hidden in the bushes until JJ came running out of the salvage yard. When it was clear that John B had found another way out, the two of them started silently down the main road. 

“So,” JJ said, shoving his hands in his pockets and puffing out his cheeks. “Why’d you move out here?” 

Pippa shrugged, her own hands in her pockets. 

“Got tired of Manhattan,” she told him. “Needed something slower.” 

“And now you’re on a treasure hunt.” JJ raised an eyebrow at her. Pippa shook her head ever so lightly with a small smile. 

“Seems like it.” 

“You’re not asking for a cut?” 

“Don’t really need the money.” 

“So why are you helping us?” 

Pippa glanced over at him, contemplating telling the whole truth, but then she shrugged again. 

“Pope asked me to.” 

JJ seemed to take it well enough. They made small talk for a few more miles before JJ finally plucked up the courage to ask her what had been on his mind since they met. 

“Hey, Pip?” He said, scowling at the ground. Pippa tried not to be shocked by the use of that nickname, but her throat still went dry. Swallowing felt like sand. 

“Yeah?” She asked, voice croaky. 

“What’s inside Area 51?” 

Pippa wasn’t exactly sure what she had expected him to ask, but that certainly wasn’t it. She pinched her eyebrows together and tried not to let out a relieved laugh. 

“There’s lots of theories about it,” she said to him, kicking a rock off the road with the toe of her shoe. 

“Yeah, but what do you think is there?” 

Pippa pressed her lips together and let out a sigh through her nose. 

“You might laugh, but here’s what I’m thinking. You know all those conspiracy videos? Like the faked moon landing videos, the JFK videos, Ancient Aliens on the History channel?” 

“Sure, yeah, I’ve seen a few of ‘em.” 

“Well, I think that all those kinds of videos are filmed in Area 51.” 

“What?” JJ laughed. Pippa lifted her hand as she tried not to smile. 

“Wait, wait, just hear me out.” She waited until JJ nodded his head for her to talk again. “So, picture this. You get past the guards at the gate and all guns and the mines and what not and you break into the warehouse. You expect to see weapons and tanks or vats full of alien parts and a space ship. However, all you see is green screens and sets, props and costumes. All these suits standing behind cameras or with boom mics and some of them are dressed up as aliens. Yeah, that’s what I think is in Area 51.” 

“You’re very strange.” 

“Maybe you just need a better imagination.”

“Probably.” 

It was just about dark by the time JJ and Pippa made it back to the Wreck. The van was out front, which wasn’t a surprise. Peering inside, Pippa could see John B, Pope, and Kie sitting at a table together, illuminated by a single candle. Pippa stopped where she stood, suddenly shivering against the cold. JJ walked a few feet before he realized that she had stopped. 

“Aren’t you coming in?” He asked, pointing toward the front door. Pippa gave him a forced smile, feeling a pit start to form in her stomach. She glanced through the window and saw the others laughing about something or another, John B’s arm thrown carelessly over the back of Kie’s chair. Pippa tried not to cringe away. 

“Nah, I should be getting home,” she said and gave him another forced smile. JJ looked back at his friends and then at you. 

“You sure?” 

“Yeah. Just...tell Pope to keep me updated.” 

“Okay. Have a safe walk home,” he said. Pippa nodded her head and shot up a thumbs up. 

“Thanks, you too.” Pippa grimaced. “I mean...just...have a good night.” 

JJ laughed quietly to himself and shook his head. 

“Night, Pippa. Welcome to the crew.” 

Pippa felt her fake smile slowly become something real. 

“Night, JJ.” 

Pippa turned away from JJ and the Wreck and started back toward the street. The sun was dipping farther and farther below the horizon, the world growing darker and darker. The street lights on Kildare often left something to be desired, but Pippa didn’t really mind the poorly lit streets. With her hand in one of her cargo pockets, she fiddled with the switchblade she carried around with her. 

Her feet were sore and tired from walking all around the island, but Pippa had grown used to it. She skipped a little bit to pass the time, kicking the same rock all the way from Figure Eight to the cut. A few men watched her as she passed by, some making more than unsavory comments. Pippa had also grown used to ignoring them. And if any of them decided that just catcalling wasn’t enough, Pippa always had the blade in her pocket. 

When she finally made it back to her Gran’s shop, Pippa’s eyes were half-closed and she was exhausted down to her bones. She passed through the shop, locking the door behind her, and made it up the stairs to the apartment above. 

“Phillipa, my dear?” Gran was sitting in a rocking chair in the living room area. 

“Yeah, it’s me, Gran,” Pippa said, dropping her bag onto the couch that she slept on every night. She flopped onto the bed after it, looking up at her gran. 

“How was your day?” Gran asked, pushing herself out of the rocking chair. Pippa snored dramatically instead of responding. Gran laughed quietly, walking over to Pippa and placing a shaky hand against her forehead. “No cars?” 

Pippa sighed and shook her head. 

“No cars.” 

Gran didn’t say anything, but simply patted Pippa’s forehead. 

“You’ll get there someday,” she said, shuffling off toward the tiny kitchen. 

“How is Yeye?” Pippa asked her as she got a glass of water. 

“He is good,” Gran told her and let out a shaky breath. “We went for a walk around the block.” 

Pippa smiled, closing her eyes and resting her hands over her chest. 

“That’s good. I’m sure that was nice,” Pippa said, feeling herself start to slowly drift into sleep. 

“It was.” Gran returned with the glass of water and handed it to Pippa, who sat up and crossed her legs, holding the glass in her hands. “Oh, a friend of yours called a little bit ago to check on you.” 

Pippa scowled. 

“I don’t have any friends,” she said, turning toward the end table to pick up the phone. 

“I know.” There was a twinkle in Gran’s eye. “Must’ve come from Figure Eight. Only they have the power to make calls right now.” 

“Did a voicemail go through?” Pippa asked her. 

“Should. Phone’s only got a little bit of power left in it though, so don’t take too long.” 

“Sure, Gran.” 

Gran gave a wave and then shuffled off toward the bedroom where Yeye was probably already sound asleep. Pippa clicked the voicemail button. 

“Hey, Pippa, it’s Kie,” a voice came from the other end. 

“And Pope!” came another. Pippa smiled to herself with the phone to her ear. 

“JJ said you walked home so we wanted to make sure you got home safe. I don’t even know if this will go through, but we’re going out to the water tomorrow to search for the Merchant. Meet us at John B’s.” Pippa scrambled for a paper as Kie rattled off an address. “Anyway. Have a good night.” 

“See you tomorrow!” Pope called out. Then the line went dead. The battery on the phone blinked. There wouldn’t be time for a return call, especially if she wanted to be able to receive more calls from them later. 

“Goodnight,” she whispered to the phone before setting it back on the charger that wouldn’t do anything as long as the power was out. Pippa stayed awake for long enough to drink her water, not even caring to change before laying down, pulling the blanket over herself, and falling fast to sleep. 

***

Pippa sat on the railing of the dock, hanging her legs over the side. Her loose fitted long sleeve blustered in the wind. Pope and JJ were fiddling with mechanics of the drone as Kie and John B tested it out below the water. Excitement brewed inside of Pippa almost as quickly as the storm in the sky. Even if she didn’t believe the gold was still on the wreck, finding the Merchant would be a great achievement. 

She’d be proud. A voice inside Pippa’s head whispered. The thought made Pippa smile. 

“God bless geeks, Pope,” JJ said, staring at the little screen. Pippa leaned back to watch the screen too. “Truly man.” 

“What would we do without you to control all our drones,” Pippa teased, putting the back of her hand against her forehead and kicking her feet out farther. 

“It’s not a drone, Pippa,” Pope said gently. “It’s an ROV.” 

“Right,” she said with a roll of her eyes. 

“Shut up,” JJ said as John B and Kie surfaced. “It’s way too early for that.” 

“Once we get footage of the wreck, we’ll bring it to a lawyer in town and file a formal claim,” John B said, a smile on his face as he breathed heavily. He brushed his wet and matted hair out of his eyes. 

“Bullshit,” JJ said, leaning against the rail that Pippa was sitting on. 

“No, it’s not. It’s very important,” she told him. 

“Why?” 

“The maritime salvage law,” Pope said, leaning on the other side of Pippa. She pointed at him and nodded her head. “You can’t just go to the ocean floor and scoop a bunch of stuff up.” 

“I know, but lawyers aren’t cheap, bro,” JJ said. Pippa shifted her lips. That much was true. It was always something she thought about when it came to fulfilling her discovery dreams. But John B seemed to have an answer for it. 

“Once they see the footage, they’ll work for a comp,” he said. 

“Says who?” asked Kie as she treaded water a few feet away from him. 

“My dad.” 

John B’s eyes flitted away from Kie and toward Pippa for just a moment, who looked suddenly down at her feet. 

“That’s fair.” 

Kie swam toward the dock, grabbing hold of the ladder. 

“This tether is like really, really long. In the wrong weather, it could get pushed around,” Pope announced, looking up at John B. Pippa leaned down and offered a hand out to Kie to help her all the way onto the dock. 

“Then we’ll go at dead calm,” John B said as he neared. As if on cue, the clouds in the sky let out a deep rumble. Pippa flattened her lips into a straight line. JJ moved around to the side of the dock to look up at the sky. 

“Slack tide?” Kie suggested, drying off her hair with a towel. 

“Now what?” Pippa asked and slid off the rail back onto the solid ground of the dock. 

“Now, we just gotta wait around for the right weather.” 

Pippa groaned. 

“Today is not that day.” 

***

With a plan to meet back at the Chateau the next morning, Pippa bade everyone her goodbye and started back toward her house. The backpack she always wore weighed heavily on her shoulders and she wasn’t so sure she really wanted to walk all the way home. Especially if it meant walking all the way back the next morning. 

Sometimes, her fear of cars was very unfortunate. 

Just as she was stepping onto the road, she heard someone call her name. Turning around, she found Kie running up to her, once again fully clothes. Her wet hair was tied up in a loose bun, though strands still fell, framing her face perfectly. 

“What are you up to the rest of today?” Kie asked, putting her hands in her pockets. Pippa shifted back and forth on her feet, tugging on the edges of her sweater. 

“Oh, I was just gonna go to the library, do some research for tomorrow,” Pippa said and tried to give her a smile. 

“There’s no need.” Kie waved her hand. “We’ll find the Merchant tomorrow, get the lawyer, and everything will be squared away. You don’t have to do any more research today.” 

“What if the gold isn’t there, though,” Pippa said, finally vocalizing her concerns. “Sure, finding the wreck itself will probably earn us some cash, but if the gold isn’t there it has to be somewhere else.” 

“The gold will be there, Pippa,” Kie said with a soft smile. She stepped forward. “Come on, let’s go out and get some ice cream or something. Tomorrow, we’ll be kings.” 

Pippa hesitated. She was used to being alone. In fact, she preferred it that way. But part of her knew that if she turned Kie down now, that loneliness that followed her around like a shadow would grow stronger. And there was no telling what would happen to her acquaintanceship with Pope if she denied his best friend one trip to the ice cream shop. 

She deliberated with herself for a few more moments before nodding finally. 

“Sure. Ice cream sounds good.” 

Kie grinned, her pearly white teeth shining brightly. Pippa felt like, for the first time in a long while, she had done the right thing. 

Pippa dropped her backpack off at John B’s house, the Chateau, they all called it. Why his name got a fancy name for his house, Pippa would never know. Maybe she should start walking around calling her Gran’s apartment something special. 

As she was walking back toward the tree where Kie was waiting for her, Pippa caught a glimpse of a girl talking to John B. With her blonde hair and her short shorts, Pippa recognized her almost immediately. Everyone who was anyone knew Sarah Cameron. Of course, Pippa was a nobody, but she knew Sarah Cameron all the same. Seeing her at the Chateau, seeing her talk to John B, was strange, out of place. 

Pippa was still scowling when she walked back over to Kie. 

“Pippa, what is it?” the other girl asked. Pippa rolled her shoulders. 

“Is there any reason Sarah Cameron would be talking to John B?” At the sound of the girl’s name, Kie went suddenly rigid. 

“Sarah’s here?” Kie asked, her voice raising an octave. 

“Um, yeah.” Pippa pointed back toward the house with her thumb. “Just saw her talking with John B.” 

Kie paled and grabbed Pippa by the wrist, pulling her toward the street. 

“We’re going now,” was all she said. Pippa felt herself start to smile. 

“What is it about Sarah Cameron that makes you want to run so badly?” She teased, hoping maybe to probe some information out of Kie. 

“Why do you keep saying her full name?” Kie asked, her voice a little snappish. Pippa shrugged even as Kie kept dragging her along behind. 

“It has a nice ring to it.” 

Kie pulled Pippa along until she was breathing heavily. 

“What’s your problem with her?” Pippa asked once Kie had slowed down. Kie’s face was red and she looked flustered. 

“She’s a….a…,” Kie grumbled and crossed her arms across her chest. “She thinks she owns the world, that everyone has to bow at her feet and if they don’t, she turns on them.” 

Pippa felt awkward all of the sudden. She was out of practice when it came to comforting someone when they were upset. 

“So, you don’t like her?” 

“Not in the least bit,” huffed Kie. Pippa thought she might have heard something under Kie’s anger that sounded like sadness. There was a deeper story between the two girls, but Pippa wasn’t surprised that Kie would be hesitant to tell her about it. 

“Let’s just get that ice cream, yeah?”

Kie dropped the angry and irritable look and smiled once again. 

“That sounds like a wonderful idea.” 

Kie took Pippa to a place on Figure Eight that she had never been to. It was a small shop, with only a few indoor seating options and it seemed relatively calm. Kie had a specific order that she knew off the top of her head, but Pippa had to sit there and think about it for a little bit longer. She eventually decided on a simple waffle cone and two scoops of chocolate cinnamon ice cream. 

The two of them went outside and found a table to sit and eat. They ate in silence for a while until Kie started asking questions. 

“So, how’d you meet Pope?” Chemistry class. “How long have you been friends?” I wouldn’t really say we’re friends…. “How long have you lived here?” Since last summer. “Do you miss your parents?” Sometimes. “What was school like in Manhattan?” Bigger, but mostly the same. “What got you into all the conspiracy stuff?” A friend. “What’s your favorite book?” The Chronicles of Narnia. “Who do you live with?” My Gran, my Yeye, and our cat, Fidget. “You like cats?” Yeah, they’re low maintenance. “I like cats too.” 

The questions came almost rapid-fire. Even if Pippa wanted to give longer answers, which she didn’t, Kie didn’t give her the chance to. 

“I kinda feel like we’re on one of those timed date things,” Pippa laughed before taking a short lick of her ice cream. She could see Kie’s cheeks darken with a blush, but the girl rolled her eyes instead of saying anything. 

Kie took up talking, telling Pippa how she met the Pogues, what living on Kildare had been like, going to the Kook academy. Pippa sat quietly and listened. Long after the ice cream was gone, Pippa and Kie sat there in the sun, chatting quietly. 

Pippa would never have let herself admit that it was the first time in a long while that it almost felt like she had a real...friend. 

“Hey, so, I was wondering why you walked everywhere,” Kie said, picking at her napkin. Pippa felt that warm feeling start to fade into something colder, like stone. She dropped her hands into her lap and pursed her lips. 

“Oh, um. I don’t really like...cars,” Pippa said and then cringed to herself. Kie noticed her discomfort on the topic and dropped it quickly. She smiled and gave her shoulders a light shrug. 

“Hey, if we stop by my house, I’ve got a longboard that you can have. That way you don’t have to walk everywhere,” she said. Pippa looked up at met Kie’s eyes, once again feeling her stone hard heart in her chest start to soften. 

“That...that would actually be really helpful. Thanks, Kiara.” 

“Oh, none of that ‘Kiara’ shit,” the girl across from her said with a laugh. “All my friends call me Kie.” 

Pippa felt her face flush. That word, ‘friend’. It had been a while since she felt like she could call someone a friend and it would take more than an ice cream date, a longboard gift, and a nickname for Pippa to feel comfortable using it. So, she just smiled and nodded her head.

They stood and Kie started to head off toward her house, starting the rapid fire questions once again. Pippa wasn’t sure how much Kie could possibly learn from her in that short amount of time other than the little things like her favorite color or her favorite place to vacation. 

“This is it,” Kie said, smiling up at her home. “Do you want to come inside?” 

For as much as Pippa had seen of Figure Eight, she expected all the houses to be extravagant greek-esque villas. But Kie’s house was relatively modest for a rich kid house. It overlooked the ocean, with a small beach just across the street. There were more windows than walls, at least, it seemed that way from the front. 

“Oh, no, I should be getting home,” Pippa said, taking a step away from the home. Kie raised an eyebrow and Pippa just gave a gentle smile. Kie seemed to understand. Stepping into the threshold of someone else’s home was a level of comfort that Pippa simply wasn’t ready for just yet. 

“Okay. Wait here and I’ll go get you that board. You know how to ride?” Kie asked. Pippa nodded. 

“I had a board back in Manhattan,” she said, her voice quiet. There was a question on Kie’s face, something like ‘why didn’t you bring it with you?’. But Kie didn’t ask. She just gave a smile. 

“Alrighty then.” Kie turned toward her house and jogged inside. Pippa shoved her hands in her pockets, rolling back and forth on her toes while she waited. The door opened again and she expected it to be Kie who walked back out, but it was a woman instead. 

“Are you Pippa?” the woman asked with a large smile on her face. Pippa nodded her head, trying to smile despite the rigidness she felt. “My name is Anna. I’m Kiara’s mom.” 

“It’s nice to meet you,” Pippa said. 

“You keeping Kiara and the boys out of trouble?” She crossed her arms over her chest, never once letting her smile fall. 

“Trying to.” Pippa curled her hands into fists but tried to cover it up. 

“I’m just glad there’s another girl around.” Anna Carrera let out an uncomfortable laugh. “I get nervous, Kiara hanging around those boys all the time.” 

Pippa scowled. 

“They’re all just friends, Mrs. Anna, I can assure you. You’ve got nothing to worry about.” 

Kie’s mom opened her mouth again, but before she could say anything, Kie stepped out of the front door. She paused, raising an eyebrow behind her mom’s head before looking over at Pippa. 

“I see you’ve met my mom,” Kie said, startling her mom. 

“Kiara!” she turned toward her daughter and smiled. “I was just saying hi.” 

“Welp, you’ve said hi and now it’s time for us to go,” Kie said, stepping past her mom, the longboard in her hands. “I’m going back to John B’s and I’m gonna spend the night.” 

“Kiara-” 

“Bye, mom!” She trotted down the stairs toward Pippa, who greeted her with a forced smile. Her mom sighed but said goodbye to her daughter all the same. 

Kie handed the longboard off to Pippa, who tucked it under her arm as they started back toward the Chateau. 

“What did she want to know?” Kie asked, fiddling with her fingers. 

“She asked if I was watching out for you and the boys.” 

Kie let out a heavy sigh. 

“She and my dad don’t like that I hang out with them,” Kie told Pippa after a few moments. “They think I’m spending too much time with the wrong crowd.” 

Pippa hummed. She didn’t want to think about what her mom and dad would say if she was hanging out with a boy who had a gun, a boy with what seemed like a permanent bruise on his eye, and a boy who was only partially reluctant to commit crimes for his friends. Still, she didn’t say anything. 

“They just don’t get that the pogues are my only friends and that I don’t really want anyone else.” Kie let out another sigh. “I guess with you hanging out with us, my parents might be a little bit more comfortable.” 

Pippa nodded her head slowly, looking down at her feet. She wasn’t really sure what to say. Once the search for the gold and the wreck was over, she was going back to her usual routine of not talking to anyone. She just wasn’t really sure how to break it to her just yet. 

“Here,” Kie said, a smile forming on her face. “If you left your board back home, you’re probably a little rusty. Let me help you.” 

Pippa rolled her eyes, taking the challenge. 

“Please. I could skate the streets of Manhattan no problem. Your flat ass roads here are no problem,” Pippa said, setting the board on the ground. 

“Oh, really?” 

“Yeah, really.” 

“Go on then.” 

“Watch the pro at work, Kiara.” 

***

“Ow, ow, ow. Shit, shit, shit,” Pippa hissed, hopping on one leg up to the house. Behind her, Kie was holding the board and laughing with a hand on her stomach. 

“What happened to being a pro?” She asked as Pippa leaned up against the wall of the Chateau. Blood dripped down her leg from a large gash in her knee. Pippa sent a glare Kie’s way before limping toward the front of the house. 

“Kie? That you?” John B came walking out of the house and looked over and saw Pippa. “Oh. Hi.” 

“Hi again,” Pippa said with a light grimace. “I’m just here to grab my bag and then I’m outta your hair.” 

“No way!” Kie said, walking up to and ducking underneath Pippa’s arm to help her walk toward the house. “We’ll get you cleaned up.” 

“It’s okay, really,” Pippa said, just as hesitant to go inside John B’s house as she was to go inside Kie’s. John B watched Kie and Pippa for a few moments. 

“I’ll go grab the first aid kit,” he said, walking back inside. Kie dropped Pippa into a chair on the front porch. Pippa looked down at the gash on her knee and let out a low hiss. 

“That’s a pretty nasty one,” Kie said, kneeling in front of her. 

“Pippa?” 

She looked up to see Pope and JJ rounding the corner. Pope was dripping wet and there was dried blood on his upper lip. She scowled and Pope gave her a single shake of his head. She wasn’t supposed to mention it. 

“What’s going on here?” JJ asked as he hopped up the stairs to the porch. 

“Pippa fell off her board,” Kie said, smacking Pippa’s hands away as she tried to poke her new cut. 

“Oof,” JJ said. “Looks painful, Pip.” 

Pippa nodded her head. 

“Thanks for the empathy.” 

Pope flopped into the chair next to Pippa and let out a heavy breath. She looked over at him and tried to ask him without asking him if he was okay. Pope gave her a short nod. 

“I’m gonna grab a beer. Anyone else want one?” JJ asked, walking toward the front door. 

“Hey, wait!” Kie stood and ran after JJ, leaving Pope and Pippa alone. 

“So, what happened to you?” Pippa asked, leaning forward to look at her knee. 

“I was gonna ask you the same question.” Pippa looked at Pope with raised eyebrows and he let out a heavy sigh. “Topper and Rafe jumped me on my delivery today.” 

“Those bastards,” Pippa seethed, pushing herself up onto her wobbly legs. “I’m going to kill them.” 

“Pippa, relax,” Pope said, pulling her back into her chair. She complied with a huff. “JJ and I handled it.” 

Pippa rolled her eyes. 

“Like that’s supposed to make me feel any better.” 

“I’m fine, Pippa,” he said finally. She narrowed her eyes at him, but finally conceded. She sighed and leaned her head back against the chair. 

“I got jumped by a rock,” she said, motioning down to her knee. Pope felt himself smile. 

“I can see that.” 

“Yup. And Kie won’t let me just go home and bandage myself up there.” 

“I should hope not.” 

John B came walking out with a scrambled together first aid in his hands. Behind him came Kie and JJ, both carrying beers. The first boy dropped to his knees in front of Pippa and started to pull open the bandaids. 

“Woah, there,” Pippa said, trying to stop him. “I can put on my own bandaids, thank you.” 

“You come to my house all bloodied up, you bet your ass I’m the one bandaging you,” John B said with a glare that told Pippa if she tried to argue, he’d make her go home with no bandages whatsoever. 

“Why don’t you just stay the night?” JJ asked, popping open his beer while he munched on some old crackers. 

“My grandparents don’t usually vibe with me not coming home,” Pippa said, giving her hair a shake. “Gran stays up until I’m safe in bed, so.” 

“Maybe next time,” Kie said. The girl was definitely starting to see a pattern about Pippa and she was starting to figure her out. Even if she didn’t know why Pippa was keeping her distance, Kie understood and wasn’t going to push. 

John B patched up Pippa’s knee, giving her leg a gentle tap before he stood. 

“You’re good to go,” he said. “We’ll see you here tomorrow morning, right?” 

Pippa stood after him. 

“You betcha.” She walked over to her bag and pulled it onto her back.

“You want a beer for the road?” JJ asked, holding out a beer for her. Pippa shook her head.

  “It’s easier for aliens to kidnap you when you’re tipsy,” Pippa said. “Gotta keep the brain sharp.” 

Kie rolled her eyes playfully, but JJ’s eyes widened. 

“Wait, are you serious?” Pippa shrugged with a knowing smile. “What about weed? Weed can’t make us more…” 

“As long as you’re wearing a tinfoil hat, you should be fine,” Pippa said, patting JJ on the shoulder. JJ finally got the joke and he glared at her. “See you guys later.” 

“Adios, Pip.” 

“Bye!” 

“Get home safe.” 

“Yeah, see you later.” 

Pippa plucked up her board and started for the street once again. She put the longboard on the ground, hopping up, and let gravity pull her down the small hill. 

***

The next morning, they were out in the water on the boat, a quiet storm sneaking up on them. Kie and Pippa stood and watched the rope, JJ drove the boat, while John B and Pope watched the screen. 

“We’re at 800 feet,” Pippa called. “We should be getting close.” 

Pope threw out a Hobbit quote that would have made Pippa laugh if she wasn’t so excited about seeing the Merchant for the first time. John B kept calling out directions for JJ, who moved the boat accordingly. Pippa clung to the side of the boat, helping Kie keep track of the feet. Her mind was running like wild. She couldn’t keep focused on anything else. 

Finding this ship, it was all she could think about for months. Maybe things might go back to normal if she found it. Maybe that carved out hole in Pippa’s chest might start to fill. Maybe Pippa could finally start to heal. 

With every second, the water was getting choppier, the wind getting rougher, the clouds getting darker. Thunder rumbled and Pippa looked up, wind whipping at her hair. 

“JJ, we’ll turtle in this storm!” John B called. JJ grumbled some unsavory words to himself as he turned the wheel. “Pope, how are we doing?” 

“Almost there,” Pope mumbled. 

“There’s too much current,” Kie said, struggling with the line. Pippa grabbed hold of the line to help her pull it back into position. 

“We’re not gonna lose it,” Pippa mumbled to herself, pulling with all of her might. 

“What do you got, Pope?” John B asked. “Come on, man. What do you see?” 

“Nothin, a whole lot of nothin,” Pope said. Pippa scowled into the water, hoping that she could maybe see 900 feet down and see the ship herself. 

“You should be right above it.” 

“Kie?” Pope called over. 

“960!” She replied. “970, 980!”

“I’m at the bottom!” Pope yelled out suddenly, making Pippa jump. Excitement curdled in her stomach, turning into something heavier, something more anxious. If it wasn’t here, Pippa didn’t know what she was going to do. It had to be here. It had to be. 

Kie and Pippa tied off the line and ran back to the screen where Pope and John B were waiting to see something. 

The screen was green and murky. It was impossible to see anything. Pippa tapped her foot on the bottom of the boat, her fingers drumming against the box that the screen rested on. Something dark started to form in all that greenness. Pippa’s heart dropped to her stomach. The closer the ROV got, the wider the smile that grew on her face. 

“Oh, good God,” Pope breathed.

  “What is it?” JJ asked behind him. “What do you see?” 

“It’s the Royal Merchant.” 

Pippa covered her mouth with her hands, unable to even blink as the tall, barnacle covered mast came into view. Her heart pounded in her chest at the sight of it and tears gathered in her eyes. 

“There she is,” Pippa whispered, her voice breaking. Instinctually, Pippa put her hands on John B’s shoulders and gave him a tight squeeze. “They’d be so proud.” 

John B looked back at her and for a moment, she thought it would be with the same sour expression he always had in her presence, but then he grinned. Pippa found that she was smiling back. John B grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her into a tight hug. Pippa was shocked at first, letting out a confused laugh. 

“Thank you,” he whispered to her. Pippa patted John B’s back slowly, glancing over at Pope and Kie, who were also smiling. 

“Of course, bud,” she said before pushing John B away from her as gently as she could manage. 

“JB,” Pope said. “We’ve got a problem.” 

John B and Pippa both returned to the screen, their smiles faded. 

“What is it?” John B asked.

“No gold.” Pope pressed his lips together. John B let out an aggravated sigh. Pippa just shook her head gently.

“I knew it,” she whispered. Gold or no gold, she was still in awe of the ship. “Pope, can you take pictures of this?”

“Sure, but why? There’s no gold here,” he said, clicking a few buttons. Pippa shook her head, but couldn’t tear her eyes from the screen. 

“I don’t care about the gold.”

“Can we do another run?” John B asked. Pope nodded his head and went through the ship again taking pictures as he went. Still, there was no gold. A single tear slipped down Pippa’s face. She tried to wipe it away, but Pope looked up and saw before she could brush it away with her sleeve. 

They went over the wreckage from different angles, Pope taking pictures as he went. Eventually, John B let out an aggravated growl, running his hands through his hair. 

“It’s okay,” Pippa said, sniffing and standing up straighter. “We can still find it.” 

“How?” He asked her, his voice tight. 

“Denmark Tanny,” was all she said. John B scoffed and plopped himself on the floor of the boat. He pulled his hood over his head and dropped his chin to his chest. 

“We should head back before the storm gets any worse,” Kie said, looking up at the sky.

“Pippa?” Pope looked over to his friend, who turned her face back to the screen. Her eyes glittered with tears once again. She breathed deeply, relishing in the last few moments of looking at the wreckage. 

“Yeah,” she said finally with a sad sigh. “Yeah, we should head back.” 

Kie walked toward the edge of the boat to start pulling up the ROV. Pippa kept her eyes on the screen the whole time, watching the wreckage start to fade back into the murky water. That burning sensation in her eyes and the thrumming in her chest never went away. 

~~~

tagging - @simonsbluee​, @parkerpetertingle​, @diverrdown​, @ponyboys-sunsets​, @outerbanksbro​, @kikifromtheblock​, @sunflowerbecca​, @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch, @lost-cause-land​, @apoguecalledjj, @abbiesthings, @outerbankslut, @sexualparkour, 

if you want to be added to the taglist, just let me know! ❤

[bat-besties]

Your secret is safe with me

A belated present for @djpurple3

Declyn and Virgil are the ultimate duo when it comes to close-up magic and its use in cons - and that's as much Delcyn's skill as Virgil being an actual mage on the run from the army.

As the two travel around the country through each season, their familiar dynamic begins to shift with the weather. 

6k words. Anxceit Fantasy AU with friends to lovers, bed-sharing, card games, and a lot of friendly bickering. 

AO3 

Edited and titled and with snow description by the lovely @5-crofters-jams 

------

Clubs

“Is this your card?” Declyn flicked his fingers to display the four of clubs.

The woman leaned back on her chair with a creak. “My baby sister could do better close-up magic than that.” She raised her eyebrows at the tent hung with yellow and black awnings and faintly mystical sigils before settling with particular disgust on Declyn himself. He was decked out in a pastiche of the outfits of the Royal Wizardry, the private army of the king any mage was required to join by law. It wouldn’t have been convincing even if they weren’t usually stationed at the palace. But the deception wasn’t meant to be seamless; he was clearly a charlatan. 

The sound of the rest of the fairground was barely faded, people chatting, singing, and cheering like a pack of wild animals.  

He gave her a brittle smile. “Is it, good lady?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Very good,” Declyn said, lingering over the words as he reached for another deck of cards. He shuffled it without looking, the cards falling back and forth and crossing around his hands. For a moment, he let go, and the cards kept on shuffling. He took her palm and laid it face-up on the table. To the woman’s credit, if the cards moving by themselves were surprising to her she didn’t show it. “Now. Let’s get down to the real business, hm?” 

“Going to tell me I’m going to find a tall, dark and handsome husband?” she said derisively. 

Declyn nodded as he bent over her hand. “Oh, totally, that is the classic line and I always follow it-” Then he looked behind her, whip-quick. He squinted at the air. “Oh. Oh, but this is very interesting. You’d like a tall, dark and handsome husband, wouldn’t you, a certain...Jake, is his name isn’t it?” 

She shifted uncomfortably, but she couldn’t pull her hand from his fingers encircling her wrist. “Who told you that?”

He waved his other hand into the air as a smirk snaked across his face. “Magic, good lady. Nothing more.” 

“Will he-” she bit her words off. “Someone must have gossiped.”

Declyn tilted his head. “Will he what?” He put on a sympathetic frown. “Will he love you back?” 

“If you were really a mage you’d be arrested by now,” she said with a toss of her head. A blush stole over her cheeks; her eyes didn’t meet Declyn’s; her pulse was rushing where his fingers touched it. Numbers and people, those were the only things Declyn knew how to read and they gave him more information than a thousand citadels of books. 

He hummed noncommittally. 

Screams rose outside before being suddenly cut off. He suppressed a flicker of irritation at having to work with this noise, let the moment stretch, and...

“So? Do you know if he likes me?”

Based on the way Jake was hanging over the bar every moment this woman’s coworker was serving… “I’d say no.” 

Her face crumpled into anger. “Why you-”

“Ah, ah, ah!” He held up a single finger. “He doesn’t like you yet.” 

“What the fuck are you talking about you-”

Declyn reached into the shadows of the tent and plucked a bottle of coloured liquid from them. “I had a feeling you would visit.” The candles flickered as a breeze stirred the tent. Their light made the bottle almost look as though it glowed from within.

She couldn’t look away from it. Five gold pieces had been the plan… should he stretch to ten? 

“Of course, there is a price… perhaps-” 

The tent disappeared. Declyn blinked for a moment at where it had been, then at the crowd whispering and cackling at the sight at him, then at the people in the same robes as him but which looked incredibly genuine surrounding him with their hands outstretched like they were about to attack-

He slowly brought his arms down and put them parallel along his stomach, fists turned against his body in a gesture which in an actual mage would have meant the only person he could shoot at was himself.   “Ah! Respected mages!” He put on a smile which suggested that, if he had magic, sweet wildflowers would grow wherever he stood. “Come to enjoy the fair, I see?”

“Are you a mage?” the leader barked at him. Authority was carried in every line of her body, from the proud arch of her neck to the tense stance she stood in, like a lioness ready to pounce.

Declyn weighed his life over his profits. He took a moment too long to admit, “No. I’m a performer. Some skill in reading people, a love of close-up illusion, you get the picture-”

“People of Goodwyn,” she said loudly. “Have you any proof of this man being a mage?”

The woman raised her hand nervously to point at his card deck. “He can make it move without touching it.” 

Rolling his eyes, Declyn picked them up again and began to shuffle them, then drew them out to show a thin thread connecting them which was clearly visible in the strong sunlight. He wove his hands across each other to show how he manipulated the thread. Unlike earlier, his hands never left the end cards. 

“He wouldn’t stoop to that if he had magic-” one of them said to the leader. 

“If he was dodging service? He’d stoop to anything,” the leader said. 

Declyn gave her a brittle smile, biting back comments about the nobility of murder and being used as the pawns of a tyrant king, about the reasons a person might not want to be a living weapon- but they were words in defense of someone who would be best served if he kept his mouth shut. “I repeat my deepest apologies for my insolence. Now, if you would return me my tent, respected mages, I shall be on my way.” 

With a wave of her hand, the leader brought back the tent neatly folded. “I’d leave this fair, were I you. You’re an embarrassment to yourself more than you are to our fine institution. Magic is not a toy, and you are out of line.” 

“I’m glad to have a reminder of my place,” he said with a wide, insincere smile. He swept everything on the table up in the velvet cloth and tied the top. “A simple person without magic such as myself forgets.” The table collapsed with a bang and he slung it over his back with two leather straps he’d attached to the base. The chairs folded, the tent could be carried slung over his arm. The illusion was broken, clear as anything. He held the chairs out at an angle from him as he walked past, forcing the mages back out of his path, and he let the bottom of the table drag along the grass, flattening it. A little petty, but what could they expect? 

More than anything, he wanted a final quip about Jake to the woman, a smooth exit line, and he would have dared it if he was alone. But the chairs were a barrier, the grass was flattened so it wouldn’t show footsteps, and those simple tricks were one of the less graceful flourishes in the most elaborate and longest-running con of his. 

Invisible as he had been in the tent when he moved the cards, swirled the breeze, handed Declyn the bottle and read the cards over the woman’s shoulder, a true mage followed Declyn out to safety. 

What better place to hide than with someone who any accusations against would look ridiculous?

And how better to scam people with magic than adding a real mage to your battery of card-tricks, illusion, and ability to read people? 

*

The road stretched out over the horizon through green stretching in every direction. Tufts of grass sprung up in the dirt road, blowsy white flowers lay sprinked like spilled popcorn in the fields, the smell of dust and wild garlic and the unrepentant blue of the sky arching above them anchored the two travellers into the moment. Fat drops of fuzz buzzed through the air, bumblebees similarly intent on their destination. The men’s backs were bowed with the weight of their possessions, and the one-two scuff of their feet in time beat a familiar pattern. 

There wasn’t silence between them; that space was too filled with birdsong, chirping insects and the occasional exhale as one adjusted the heavy pack on his back.

Declyn didn’t look as striking outside of his fake robe, he was of medium height, medium build, and had hair and eyes the same colour as the road. The mage also didn’t have an appearance which might have betrayed his identity, not in the same way the leader’s confident posture might have. He was dark-haired, dark-eyed, and heavy eye-bags gave him a look of perpetual exhaustion. That exhaustion was most often directed at the partner in his illegal double-act. 

When Declyn had run into him fresh out of running from the army, he’d been a mess of sharp angles and edges, eyes never able to stay in one place or meet another person’s, skittering between attacks of insult and defenses of overdone apology. Now, he could be hardly described as relaxed, but he could fall into playful banter or slow contemplation with Declyn easily, or their winding, passionate conversations which tried to set everything right in a society they existed in the periphery of. Rest, hearty inn food, being less anxious and not pushing his magic as much had rounded out the edges of his face and body. 

Declyn watched as Virgil scrunched his face up and tilted it into the sun, leaving his eyes closed longer than he’d be comfortable with if he were anxious. Once Virgil had blinked his eyes back open, it seemed now would be as good a time as any to bring up the raid. 

“Thank you for following me out, Virgil, I do appreciate you not trying anything hasty. Fireballs are not as much your forte as invisibility.” 

“That was one time!” Virgil protested. “I’m not the one who got us run out of town for somehow finding a real truth serum to sell the mayor.” Declyn knew he wasn’t annoyed as his tone would have suggested to someone else.

“Now that it’s over, we can laugh about it!” Declyn said. “The admission he was hoarding grain really did cause such consternation! Nothing so exciting had happened in that little town for years.”

“We could laugh if I didn’t almost get an arrow in the ass,” Virgil grumbled, but the corners of his mouth were twitching up despite himself. His low voice and withdrawn expressions were only intimidating five minutes into meeting him, Declyn thought. After that, they were practically endearing. 

“Oh, of course, of course,” Declyn said, voice dripping with sarcasm. The effect was lost because he, too, was smiling. Encounters like the one earlier could really spook Virgil, and he was glad this one hadn’t as much. 

One-two, one-two. They didn’t even notice how in time their footsteps were.

“You did a good job,” Virgil said. “They were idiots, not High Command, and that helped a lot. But you weren’t too bad.”

“Why, thank you, Virgil,” Declyn said archly. “I shall remember your effusive compliments for the rest of my days.”

“Course you will,” Virgil said. He tilted his face into the sun once again. “This weather would be nice if it didn’t make you so fucking sweaty.”

“Strike two for being charming. I feel I might just swoon away.”

“You’re the silver-tongued one of the group - as you keep telling me they called you in your home city.” Virgil teased. “So you should be doing the flirting.”

“They also said I was cold-hearted.” Declyn’s face twisted into a pantomime of disgust. “Rue the day I flirt with you.” 

They laughed together, the noise swooping over the birdsong and buzzing insects, a natural part of the summer landscape. 

“The thought of you being in one of those little squadrons is bizarre,” Declyn said. “You’re so not a team player.”

“Yeah, not a huge fan of groups,” Virgil said. “Or leaders. Or orders.” He shrugged. “Or the group hating you for not following cruel orders, but that’s just the way of that kind of structure, isn’t it?” 

A rebellious village who wouldn’t pay taxes after a poor harvest; being pushed into formation by his leader; the order to burn and destroy what the crown couldn’t have- 

a deluge of water to put it all out which shocked them so much they didn’t trace it to Virgil until he was invisible and untraceable in the woods. 

“It’s best to work alone, this we both know well,” Declyn said. He’d struck off alone when he was just barely sixteen, leaving the crowded city he’d been born in where his cup games and card tricks had to jostle with hundreds of others scratching and pushing for a living, heading for the novelty of the mountains and travel. Even before, he’d been a solitary child- how much that was a choice and how much he’d driven away other children in his deceitful schemes and scheming deceits was a matter of interpretation between him and them. He was always wanting, wanting, wanting, and until he met Virgil and began to work even more elaborate schemes, he thought there wasn’t even a chance his ambition could be satisfied.

Virgil nodded. “Nice to work alone with you.”

There was a not-entirely serious lilt to his voice, and it quietened something inside Declyn. He gave Virgil a cordial nod, also not entirely serious. “Likewise.”

Virgil gave a little evil laugh. “That’s right. You’re stuck with me.” 

Diamonds

“Virgil, never in my life have I met someone who washes brambles straight off the hedgerow. Please, eat them like a human being.”

Autumn meant walking back to the fires of the city, and walking meant stealing brambles (as Declyn would say) or blackberries (as Virgil insisted they were called) off the hedgerows they passed, along with the apples of any farmer who had let his tree grow too far over his fences.

Virgil plucked another blackberry off the hedgerow and hosed it down with a little stream of water he collected from the moisture in the air. His eyes glowed purple as he used his magic. “You don’t know where this thing has been.”

“On the bloody hedgerow!” Declyn said with a wild gesture at the clean-looking bush. “Where else?”

“Maybe there are insects in it, or maybe...a mouse has been there, or-”

Delcyn was bickering, but not annoyed. “Sometimes I forget you grew up in the palace, and at times like this-”

“You say that like I was a prince rather than a child soldier-”

“Child soldier, you’re so dramatic, you were a cadet at best-”

“And, yes, we did wash fruit, so we didn’t get sick-”

“Virgil,” Declyn took a big breath. “Are you completely sure that this innocent little berry, washed by the rains, dried by the suns, is less hygienic than some of the food we get served at the cheaper of the inns?”  

“Look, if an insect gets into a stew at least it’s not alive.” Virgil picked another one and washed it again. “Just let me live, dude.”

Declyn looked at the orange leaves which fell as they did every year, showing the turning of the seasons, the sky cloudy and stretching out to infinity, the dew-drops on a spider’s web which was itself a miracle of nature. Then he decided he was much too petty to let this go. “Of course, there’s nothing more normal than washing your brambles- sorry, blackberries -” He picked a ripe one and tossed it upward to catch with his mouth.

There was a flash as the blackberry disappeared and reappeared in Virgil’s own hand. He carefully hosed it down, eyes glowing with purple in a way Declyn knew was natural but nevertheless decided to read as an insult, and then handed it back to Declyn with a completely shit-eating grin. “Now you’re not gonna get poisoned.”

Declyn held up a single finger as he gathered his faculties.

Virgil couldn’t help snorting with anticipatory laughter.

“Never-” Declyn began

“Uh-huh?”

“-so insulted-”

“Oh really?”

“This is an affront, a misuse of your magic-”

“You sound like the leader I had when I was thirteen-”

Out of principle, Declyn threw the blackberry to the side of the road.

Virgil merely opened a hand and it flew back into it. He began to hose it off again.

“Virgil, not once in my thirty years of life have I felt the need to rinse a piece of fruit. I am not a bloody noble. Outside of the palace, neither drinking water nor food were so abundant.”

Virgil flicked his eyes over Declyn, to see if he’d gone too far. It wasn’t like tension could build up about their backgrounds with how often they bickered bringing them into it, but there were sensitive parts for both of them. “Give me a bet,” Virgil said.

“Pardon?”

“Give me a bet,” Virgil repeated. “The winner gets the other to eat his way.”

Declyn rolled his eyes. He knew Virgil was placating him, but...he didn’t mind too much. “Fine. The bet is very easy. You find a single insect on a blackberry, and you’re justified.”

“How’d you know I won’t lie to you that I saw one?”

Declyn gave Virgil a look. They both knew Virgil didn’t lie to Declyn. Whether Declyn did to Virgil they were much less sure about - or, Declyn was more unsure than Virgil seemed to be.

“Fine,” Virgil said. “C’mon you wriggly little motherfuckers...”

As Virgil poked around the hedgerow, Declyn continued contentedly eating blackberries, happy to pause walking for a short while. He scrunched his eyes and tilted them up into the weakening rays of the autumn sun.

Five minutes later, Virgil conceded defeat.

“I win, of course,” Declyn crowed. Even if Virgil had given it to him, victory was still tart and sweet as he popped a blackberry into his mouth.

Virgil took one of the highest brambles from the hedgerow. With ceremony, he placed it on his tongue. “Well,” he said after it was eaten. “I’m not dead yet.”

“No. I wish we could carry more of these,” Declyn mused. “It would be nice further on down the road…”

Virgil tilted his head as he thought about that. “You got that empty bottle from earlier? The one which had mead in it.”

“Unfortunately I might have possibly sat on my pack when we had lunch and there was a rather nasty crunching.”

Virgil hummed in thought. “Can you give me the pieces?”

Declyn rooted through his backpack and found the shards at the bottom, which he carefully extracted and put into Virgil’s cupped hands.

After just a moment focusing on the shapes, Virgil’s eyes began to glow as the edges of the glass shards melted and attached, so a crystalline bowl shape was made. “There you are.”

It looked almost like the kind of diamond dishes nobles would propose with.

“Yes, a thousand times yes!” Declyn said as he took it off Virgil. “Oh, my darling.”

“What the-” Virgil looked back at the bowl again and his eyes widened in understanding. “Oh!” He laughed. “Only the most expensive things for you.”

“My, it sparkles in the sun like how your eyes look when you hear your favourite edgy songs about ghosts and lost lovers started by a fair performer!” Declyn teased. “It’s almost as cutting as your comments! And it’s so deep-” He flashed Virgil a smile. “It still probably can’t carry as much as those eye bags, though.”

Virgil rolled his eyes, less into the play-acting. He seemed almost embarrassed.  “I thought I’d get you something as genuine as you are.”

Declyn held a hand over his heart. “You say the sweetest things.”

They walked on, filling the makeshift bowl with blackberries- “Brambles,” Declyn corrected.

“It’s my wedding too, I can call them blackberries.”

“If I call you handsome, can I call them brambles?”

Virgil’s cheeks went pink, and Declyn laughed, because he had won - even if he was pretty sure Virgil had still let him.

When they came into town, a group of kids in ragged clothing ran up to see the performers, and they handed over the blackberries as Declyn put on a show with close-up magic and Virgil sat and watched, seeing as he hadn’t had time to go invisible. Declyn drew coins out behind the children’s ears and left them with the kids. It might have to be a night on the grassy verge of the road, but Virgil didn’t think about stopping his partner.

They left the bowl with the kids too.

“It was Virgil’s wedding proposal to me,” Declyn said seriously.

“Really?” A girl tilted her head to look at it and assess it.

“No,” Declyn said. “It’s just glass, but don’t say that to whoever you sell it to. Besides, Virgil and I...” He met Virgil’s eyes. He’d been about to make a jab about how different they were, but that didn’t feel true. Maybe lying to Virgil was only hard when it hurt him. “When the time comes, Virgil will know when I’m proposing.”

“I’ll know when you con someone out of their dish and I help get it off them in plain sight,” Virgil joked, and warmth flooded Declyn’s chest. He’d kept his friend happy, and all was well in the world.

“You’re no good at sleight of hand,” Declyn said as if in answer to a question a few exchanges later.

The little girl wandered off, uninterested now that she had the dish.

“I don’t need it, I have actual magic,” Virgil replied.

“And you give yourself away so obviously!” Declyn said. “If it’s something like today and you can’t go invisible, you should still help.” He drew his cards out of their inside pocket of  his cloak. “Come, I should teach you.”

“Oh yeah?”

With a flick of his wrist, Declyn drew a card out of his sleeve. “This one is child’s play. Come on, at least try.”

Virgil laughed through his nose. “Only because it would piss everyone else off back home.”

Spades

It was the first snowy day of a crisp winter. As they walked in the icy cold, Declyn had teased Virgil about his cosy palace upbringing (that many mages could build crazily efficient central heating) all the way into town, and completely missed the purple flicker in Virgil’s eyes which preceded a pile of snow sliding down a rooftop and landing directly on top of him.

Declyn toppled over. The uncomfortably wet and unbearably cold sensation of snow soaking into every part of his being caused him to shriek in mild shock and not-so-mild irritation as Virgil laughed so hard he fell into the snow himself.

“And you-” Virgil was almost breathless. “You just-” He cackled. “Serves you right-” The way he laughed was bubbling and open, like a child- ha ha ha ha!

A sharp spike of something went through Declyn at the sight of Virgil, red-cheeked and eyes crinkled as he laughed in whooping bursts. He decided the spike was definitely a need for revenge. “Oh, Virgil!” He called in a sing-song voice. “I shall of course forgive this-” As soon as he had his friend’s attention he gathered up a pile of snow and lunged for Virgil’s neck. Virgil rolled out of the way at the last moment, flicking snow at Declyn. Not to be outdone, Declyn feinted right before darting his hand over Virgil’s wrist and using his knee to pin him down. He gathered a handful of snow and held it over Virgil’s face in triumph. “Any last words?”

Virgil’s chest kicked beneath Declyn and at that and his wide-eyed expression he let go immediately. “Too much?”

Virgil nodded, closing his eyes for a brief moment and pushing himself up. “Give me a moment, then I’ll utterly destroy you in a snowball fight.”

For a few moments, Declyn sat shivering as Virgil composed himself and watched the slow rise and fall of his chest. Then he leapt to his feet with a wicked grin. “Ten seconds to prepare, then we go?”

Declyn matched Virgil’s expression. “Prepare to be decimated.”

*

When they tumbled into the inn, both were soaked and shivering. Virgil looked embarrassed to come into the building that way, but Declyn was riding high on his victory and came to the counter without a shred of shame at the snowmelt he was trailing over the entrance.

“A room for two, please.” It was cheaper than two singles.

The innkeeper gave the two of them a searching look. “That’s seven fiebri, three more for breakfast, and we only have ones with one bed left.”

“That’s quite alright.” It happened sometimes, and they were happy to just stick to their own sides.

The room was small and plain, but it had a lock to protect their possessions and a bed, and that was all they needed. They dumped their soaked packs by the fire in the hope they might dry by morning, then kicked off their damp clothes and pulled on new ones, playing over the highlights of their match, and deciding they were too tired for dinner.

It was very cold, as night fell, and Delcyn teased Virgil by putting his cold feet on his back, which resulted in Virgil heating himself up so quickly that Delcyn pulled his foot away with a yelp. They fell asleep quickly, exhausted by the walking and snowball fight that day.

*

Declyn woke up to Virgil cuddled into his side. He was soft, and warm. His breath whistled through his nose as he slept and Declyn was going to have a heart attack. It hurt to be so close. All of it hurt: the way the morning light drifted across Virgil’s hair, rumpled and a little greasy from travel and completely out of bounds for Declyn to touch, how defenseless Virgil was, the warmth pressed steady to his side, the scent of soap and smoke- the curve of Virgil’s cheek, how it had softened since he left the army, even his bloody eye bags which didn’t disappear after hours of rest-

Declyn could read cards and other people, nothing else. This pain was a foreigner in his body; he couldn’t translate what it was telling him. It was just Virgil.

Was he angry at Virgil? No. No, that felt all wrong. Jealous? Grieving? No, Virgil wasn’t going anywhere. You’re stuck with me.

They were stuck together, weren’t they? This was...it, now.

Declyn and Virgil. The same scam, the same routine, the same banter, the same understanding, the same room every night. To his horror, heat prickled at the corner of his eyes. That sounded perfect.

Scrunching his eyes shut to try and squeeze the tears away, he instead sent one rolling down his cheek and onto Virgil’s.

“-fucking inn-keeper,” Virgil growled without opening his eyes. His voice was rough with sleep and to hear the normal rasp of it from him now, with the foreign aching beating at Declyn’s breastbone like a second heart, was cataclysmic.

Suppressed sobs were tremors, tears flooded his eyes, and the wanting wanting wanting Virgil usually quieted in him was back, but as something entirely different. He wanted Virgil to be awake, and with him, and at the same time he couldn’t bear for him to see.

Naturally, Virgil woke at Declyn's slight shaking beside him. "Dec?" his eyes blinked open. "Oh, fuck, I..." He scrambled back to the corner of the bed, trying to give Declyn as much space as possible. "I'm so sorry, I was asleep, I swear. Maybe you can try and breathe with me-"

Declyn didn't know what to do. He threw Virgil's pillow at him. "I'm not panicking, you fool."

"...you kind of seem like you are, dude." Virgil got off the bed fully, edging towards the door. "Do you want space? I can hang out downstairs, give you time-"

At that, Declyn's sobs only increased.

"What- what is the matter, then?" He was panicking, and it was so like him, Declyn thought, and-

Declyn had never called a spade a spade if he could call it an ‘digging implement with exciting capabilities never seen before- you could even carry it by the handle!’ and sell it for twice the price, but Virgil was adamant about not letting Declyn even subtly convince or manipulate him. Besides, his words felt inadequate and flimsy. There was no dignified way to ask for what he wanted.

“Come cuddle me, you dumb fuck,” Declyn sobbed.

Virgil’s eyes widened and he came back to  bed, laying down besides Declyn. “Geez, they don't say you're silver-tongued and cold-hearted for nothing,” he grumbled. But he scooted up to Declyn and wrapped his arms back around him gently.

Declyn buried his face in the crook of Virgil’s neck, curling his arms in front of him as he squished against Virgil’s chest.

Virgil didn’t ask what was up, even though this was hugely out of character. He just held Declyn close and rubbed his back occasionally.

Needing to be close, not knowing why, Declyn wiggled his ankle between Virgil’s and in response Virgil tangled their legs together.

Virgil breathed deeply, already sounding like he was half back to sleep.

Declyn let their chests move together. He could feel Virgil’s heartbeat.

After some time, Declyn’s sobs tailed off but he didn’t want to let go. Still, he should compose himself, put himself back together, all of that…

But he didn't. Around them, the sound of people clattering around to get out of their rooms came through the thin wall, there was a distant crash, a shouted disagreement. They made the moment better, because they made it real. Declyn felt a puff of air in his hair as Virgil slid back into sleep, and he let his own eyes flutter shut. Just a few more minutes of this and they'd be on the road....

And so, Declyn drifted back off into sleep in the arms of his partner.

They woke up late, ran a game involving Virgil vanishing and reappearing dice, then walked to the next village, all without discussing it. That night-

“Single or double bed?” Another bored innkeeper, almost indistinguishable from the one in the last town.

Declyn grinned at his friend. “Still feeling cuddly, Virge?”

“Oh, I think a little birdie told me the answer-” In the same elaborate gesture as Declyn used to reveal the products of his close-up illusion, Virgil flipped his partner in crime off.

“Shame, really. You do run like a furnace. All that luxurious heat as a child must have soaked into your skin-”

“-and they say the streets of your city are covered in shit.”

The innkeeper was singularly unimpressed at their snarking. “One or two?”

Virgil shrugged. “Guess I’ll have to take pity on Declyn’s cold-bloodedness and say one.”

In a worldless negotiation of eyes and limbs, they found themselves tangled together before they drifted off that night.

Since it was winter, they said a week later, this new arrangement was sensible.

As the buds began to bloom into spring, it didn’t change.

Hearts

It was a hot afternoon, pregnant and storm-heavy, the kind of sky which made Declyn ache in wanting. Spring was ending, and endings made him antsy. Time to go, to move, to do...but they’d eaten their lunch in the shade of an oak tree and the light was dappling Virgil’s face, and the wanting stilled into restless playfulness.

“Come on, Virgil, indulge me and guess the top card of this pile.” Declyn shook the pack at him. “It’s brand new.”

“I literally saw you cut it open and remelt the seal yesterday,” Virgil said.

“Details, details,” Declyn dismissed with a wave of his hand. “Come on, do guess. No magic.”

Virgil stuck his tongue out at Declyn, but took the pack of cards and turned them over in his hands. “Uh...well, you said that people usually go for the picture cards, so it’s better to pick a number card. But then, you know I know that, so you might just pick a picture card, if this was for me and not someone else…”

Declyn didn’t reveal anything, putting on a very impressive poker face as he watched Virgil’s lashes tilt downwards as he looked down at the cards. Virgil cut him a searching look.

“Oh…” Virgil said, his face glowing more red than gold despite the yellow light.  

Declyn raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

Virgil ran a finger over the seam of the cards, eyes glowing purple as he disappeared the wax effortlessly. “Ace of hearts,” he said simply. He tipped out the pack to reveal, as he’d said, the ace of hearts on the top of the pile. “Is this your card?”

“It is indeed,” Declyn said. “I’m impressed.”

Virgil gave him another untranslatable look. He flicked his wrist, and Declyn was looking in his eyes as the card disappeared, so he saw there was no real magic used. Sleight of hand.

Declyn raised an eyebrow. “Do you think you can surprise me without your magic?” But his voice was approving, and suggested he would very much like to be surprised.

At that, whatever the look was intensified, Virgil’s mouth setting in a competitive quirk. He shifted closer to Declyn. He put his hand into the pocket over Declyn’s chest, and from it pulled- “Is this your heart?”

“Card,” Declyn corrected quietly. The brush of Virgil’s fingers still burned warm against his chest.

“I know what I said,” Virgil said. He was more hesitant, his eyes shifting as they searched Declyn’s own. Looking for something. Scared, but not backing away. A flush rising in his cheeks.

What was Declyn’s heart? Frozen solid, a shouting foreigner, a traitor which now flooded his own face with colour?

Slowly, he reached out to push Virgil’s hand holding the card against Virgil’s own heart. He moved their hands again, to feel the fluttering of Virgil’s chest. Last night, his head had risen and fell as it laid on Virgil’s steady breathing. His lips parted. Words, however, had deserted him.

His eyes met Virgil’s again, and there was no beating in his own chest, even as Virgil’s heart thudded against his fingers. He recognised that foreign rhythm from inside himself, from the first night of snow. “Virgil,” he said distantly.

“Yes?”

“Virgil, how long have we loved each other?”

Virgil’s eyes widened. “Both of us?”

Declyn nodded.

“I- I loved you- shit, Dec, I don’t know. I just- I guess I thought about it dicking around with the bowl. When you got all excited about teaching me card tricks after. I dunno if it was before, or after, but around- around then.” Virgil was beginning to tear up. “Do you-?”

“I don’t know,” Declyn said. “I didn’t know. But I think-” He moved one hand from Virgil’s chest to clumsily wipe at his tears. “I think, yes. I do. For a long time, now.”

“Then come kiss me, oblivious,” Virgil said gruffly, a little choked-up.

Declyn leaned in without thinking more.

It was Virgil.  The scent of soap and smoke. A quirk at the corner of his mouth that he couldn’t control. Steady pressure, warm and soft. He made sense. He was real. The kiss was not everything Declyn had imagined - Declyn had been too stupid to imagine, too scared, maybe-

But had he tried to imagine, this was nothing he could pretend.

When they pulled away both of their faces were tear-tracked. “Absolutely no-one else can know we both cried like this,” Virgil said with a wet laugh.

“And no-one will,” Declyn said, wiping at his own eyes. “Your secret is safe with me.”

In the distance, the sky broke into rain. They could see the curtain of it hanging over the mountains, grey and misting. The air began to cool, even as far away as they were, and the golden light sharpened as if reflected off glass. It was the kind of weather which made Declyn curl up against Virgil’s side, letting his partner card his hand through his hair. Tension eased from the air, shivering the leaves above as it drained away into swirling breezes. The land rolled endless away from them, with its skeins of roads unravelling into the distance. They had travelled so many of them this spring, but the playful light made them look new once more. As always, the roads tugged a place inside Declyn he didn’t think would ever be subdued. That tugging would pull them to new adventures, every day as long as he followed it. For now, it was a sweet ache as they took their unhurried time underneath the oak tree.

They kissed again, long and slow as summer days. It felt a lot like a beginning. 

[baddadjokez]

514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.​I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.​Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.​Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!​I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.​What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.​How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.​I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.​Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.​I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.​My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.​Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.​How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.​What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.​Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.​There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.​What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.​What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.​Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.​Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.​How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.​The shovel was a ground breaking invention.​A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."​A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."​Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.​What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.​I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.​What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.​I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.​Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.​Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"​Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.​What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.​Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.​What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.​What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.​What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.​A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.​After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.​I used to be afraid of hurdles, but I got over it.​To write with a broken pencil is pointless.​I read a book on anti-gravity. I couldn’t put it down.​I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang but it came back to me.​What should you do if you are cold? Stand in the corner. It’s 90 degrees.​How does Moses make coffee? Hebrews it.​The energizer bunny went to jail. He was charged with battery.​What did the alien say to the pitcher of water? Take me to your liter.​What happens when you eat too many spaghettiOs? You have a vowel movement.​The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.​Sausage puns are the wurst.​What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.​Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything.​What’s it called when you have too many aliens? Extraterrestrials.​Want to hear a pizza joke? Nevermind, it’s too cheesy.​What do cows tell each other at bedtime? Dairy tales.​Why can’t you take inventory in Afghanistan? Because of the tally ban.​Why didn’t the lion win the race? Because he was racing a cheetah.​What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up? It becomes daytrogen.​What’s it called when you put a cow in an elevator? Raising the steaks.​What’s america’s favorite soda? Mini soda.​Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.​What kind of car does a sheep drive? Their SuBAHHru.​What do you call a french pig? Porque.​What do you call a line of rabbits marching backwards? A receding hairline.​Why don’t vampires go to barbecues? They don’t like steak.​How do trees access the internet? They log on.​Why should you never trust a train? They have loco motives.​Is your refrigerator running? Better go catch it.​The future,the present and the past walked into a bar.Things got a little tense.​I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself this is the last thing I need.​I just found out I'm colorblind. The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.​I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.​Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.​I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.​Read enough of our funny puns, and you'll be punstoppable.​Yesterday a clown held the door for me. It was a nice jester.​I used to go fishing with Skrillex but he kept dropping the bass.​The wedding was so emotional even the cake was in tiers.​What does a house wear? A dress.​Why can't bicycles stand up on their own? Since they are 2 tired.​I owe a lot to the sidewalks. They’ve been keeping me off the streets for years.​Imagine if alarm clocks hit you back in the morning.It would be truly alarming.​Why is a skeleton a bad liar? You can see right through it.​What do you receive when you ask a lemon for help? Lemonaid.​A man sued an airline company after it lost his luggage. Sadly, he lost his case.​What does a dog say when he sits down on a piece of sandpaper? Ruff!​What do you call crystal clear urine? 1080pee.​At my boxing club there is only one punch bag. I hate waiting for the punch line!​An untalented gymast walks into a bar.​Einstein developed a theory about space, and it was about time too.​I was accused of being a plagiarist, their word not mine.​My friends say they don’t like skeleton puns. I should put more backbone into them.​Let me FILL you in on my trip to the dentist.​Why does the singer of Cheap Thrills not want us to Sia?​Traveling on a flying carpet is a rugged experience.​Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.​The old woman who lived in a shoe wasn’t the sole owner,there were strings attached.​Did you hear about the crime in the parking garage? It was wrong on so many levels.​My new diet consists of aircraft, its a bit plane.​Have you ever tried to milk a cow which has been cut in half? Udder madness.​Why are there fences on graveyards? Because people are dying to get in.​Why do trees have so many friends? They branch out.​Models of dragons are not to scale.​Never discuss infinity with a mathematician, they can go on about it forever.​Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.​Don’t trust people that do acupuncture, they’re back stabbers.​A persistent banker wouldn’t stop hitting on me so I asked him to leave me a loan.​I ordered a book of puns last week, but i didn't get it.​People say i look better without glasses but i just can't see it.​Don’t judge a meal by the look of the first course. It’s very souperficial.​I heard Donald Trump is going to ban shredded cheese, and make America grate again.​I relish the fact that you’ve mustard the strength to ketchup to me.​What do you call a young musician? A minor.​Police were called to a daycare yesterday, where a 2-year-old was resisting a rest.​If artists wear sketchers do linguists wear converse?​I changed my iPod name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.​Jill broke her finger today, but on the other hand she was completely fine.​I smeared some ketchup all over my eyes once. It was a bad idea in Heinz- sight.​I flipped a coin over an issue the other day, it was quite the toss-up.​I got hit in the head with a can of soda? Luckily it was a soft drink.​I heard that the post office was a male dominated industry.​Why isn’t suntanning an Olympic sport? Because the best you can ever get is bronze.​What do you mean June is over? Julying.​Why is Kylo Ren so angry? Beause he’s always Ben Solo.​These reversing cameras are great. Since I got one I haven’t looked back.​The candle quit his job because he felt burned out.​Our maintenance guy lost his legs on the job, now he’s just a handyman.​Going to bed with music on gave him sound sleep.​A magic tractor drove down the road and turned into a field!​I met some aliens from outer space. They were pretty down to earth.​The plane flight brought my acrophobia to new heights.​My phone has to wear glasses ever since it lost its contacts.​I, for one, like Roman numerals.​How do mountains see? They peak.​The show was called Spongebob Squarepants but everyone knows the star was Patrick.​This is not alcohol, water you thinking?!​Novice pirates make terrible singers because they can’t hit the high seas.​I told my friend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.​The earth's rotation really makes my day.​If I buy a bigger bed will I have more or less bedroom?​Two peanuts were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was a-salted.​Two ropes were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was a-frayed.​What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.​I got a master’s degree in being ignored; no one seems to care.​After eating the ship, the sea monster said, I can’t believe I ate the hull thing.​Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.​A bartender broke up with her boyfriend, but he kept asking her for another shot.​I had a pun about insanity but then I lost it.​He couldn’t work out how to fix the washing machine so he threw in the towel.​Why does the man want to buy nine rackets? Cause tennis too many.​Why don’t cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny.​If I got paid in lots of Pennes I would make loads of pasta.​I thought I saw a spider on my laptop, but my friend said it was just a bug.​A doctor broke his leg while auditioning for a play.Luckily he still made the cast.​The tale of the haunted refrigerator was chilling.​Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them.​If you wear cowboy clothes are you ranch dressing?​I was addicted to the hokey pokey but I turned myself around.​Simba, you're falling behind. I must ask you to Mufasa.​I bought a wooden whistle but it wooden whistle.​The bomb didn't want to go off. So it refused.​The sore mummy needed a Cairo-practor​I feel sorry for shopping carts. They’re always getting pushed around.​The display of still-life art was not at all moving!​On Halloween October is nearly Octover.​Pig puns are so boaring.​Why couldn’t the dead car drive into the cluttered garage? Lack of vroom.​What do you call Samsung's security guards? Guardians of the Galaxy.​What does Superman have in his drink? Just ice.​How does a penguin build it’s house? Igloos it together.​Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.​The safe was invented by a cop and a robber. It was quite a combination.​What do you do when balloons are hurt? You helium.​One hat says to the other, "You stay here, I’ll go on a head."​How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.​When does a farmer dance? When he drops the beet.​When the scientist wanted to clone a deer, he bought a doe it yourself kit.​If people ask how many puns I made in Germany I reply, "nein"​Did you hear about the invention of the white board? It was remarkable.​If Donald Trump becomes president, America is going toupee.​Can February March? No, but April May.​I hate Russian Dolls, they are so full of themselves.​What do you do to an open wardrobe? You closet.​The magazine about ceiling fans went out of business due to low circulation.​So what if I don’t know what apocalypse means? It’s not the end of the world!​Some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped. It was otter chaos.​A backwards poem writes inverse.​Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.​I asked my friend, Nick, if he had 5 cents I could borrow. But he was Nicholas.​The soundtrack for Blackfish was orcastrated.​Where do you imprison a skeleton? In a rib cage.​There’s a fine line between the numerator and the denominator.​I used to work at a hairdresser but i just wasn’t cut out for it.​Why is metal and a microwave a match made in heaven? When they met, sparks flew.​The lumberjack loved his new computer. He especially enjoyed logging in.​Garbage collectors are rubbish drivers!​When the church relocated it had an organ transplant.​Lettuce take a moment to appreciate this salad pun.​The scarecrow get promoted because he was outstanding in his field.​Sleeping comes so naturally to me, I could do it with my eyes closed.​I never understood odorless chemicals, they never make scents.​What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones.​Why was dumbo sad? He felt irrelephant.​When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.​Old skiers never die. They just go down hill.​Did you hear about the pun that was actually funny? Neither have we.​You know why I like egg puns? They crack me up!​Want to hear a pun about ghosts? That's the spirit!​I used to make clown shoes… which was no small feat.​Did you hear about the human cannonball? Too bad he got fired!​What happened when the magician got mad? She pulled her hare out!​Did you hear about the circus that caught on fire? It was in tents.​The one day of the week that eggs are definitely afraid of is Fry-day.​A hen will always leave her house through the proper eggs-it.​The man who ate too many eggs was considered to be an egg-oholic.​All the hens consider the chef to be very mean because he beats the eggs.​Eskimos keep all of their chilled eggs inside of the egg-loo.​Under the doctor’s advice, the hen is laying off eggs for a few weeks.​I had a real problem making a hard-boiled egg this morning until I cracked it.​The best time of day to eat eggs is at the crack of dawn.​The chicken coop only had 2 doors since if it had 4 doors it would be a sedan.​Crossing a cement mixer and a chicken will result in you getting a brick layer.​That reckless little egg always seems to egg-celerate when he sees the light turn yellow.​Hopefully this egg pun doesn't make your brain too fried or scrambled.​Don't ever have multiple people wash dishes together. It's hard for them to stay in sink.​People using umbrellas always seem to be under the weather.​I dissected an iris today. It was an eye-opening experience.​What was Forrest Gump’s email password? 1forrest1.​What planet is like a circus? Saturn, it has three rings!​Before my father died he worked in a circus as a stilt walker. I used to look up to him.​Why did the lion eat the tightrope walker? He wanted a well-balanced meal!​I really look up to my tall friends.​I hate negative numbers and will stop at nothing to avoid them.​Long fairy tales have a tendency to dragon.​It takes guts to make a sausage.​Why shouldn’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she’ll “Let It Go”!​What do you call cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese!​How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it​What do you get when a witch goes to the beach? A sand-witch!​Where do cows go on Friday nights? To the mooooo-vies!​What did the mommy tomato say to the baby tomato? C’mon, ketchup!​Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he wasn’t “peeling” well!​What did one snowman say to the other? Do you smell carrots?​Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had no body to go with!​What is a pirate’s favorite letter? Arrrrrr!​What does a piece of toast wear to bed? His pa-JAM-as!​What does one eye say to the other eye? Something between us smells​Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!​What happens when an egg laughs? It cracks up!​What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!​Why didn’t the teddy bear want dessert? Because he was stuffed!​Why can’t you tell a joke while ice skating? Because the ice might crack up!​What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop!​What’s mommy and daddy’s favorite ride at the carnival? A married-go-round!​How did Cookie Monster feel after eating all the cookies? Pretty crummy!​What do you call a skunk who flies in a helicopter? A smelly-copter!​What do you get when you shake a cow? A milkshake!​How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut!​Why did the bee get married? Because she found her honey!​What did the ocean say to their airplane? Nothing, it just waved!​Where do eskimo pigs live? In pig-loos.​What’s a dinosaur called when it’s sleeping? A dino-snore!​What did the cookie say to the annoying cookie? Crumb on!​Why did Mickey Mouse go up in space? To find Pluto!​What does Olaf eat for lunch? Icebergers!​What letter is always wet? The C!​How do you throw a space party? You planet.​How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.​Nope. Unintended.​The shovel was a ground breaking invention, but everyone was blow away by the leaf blower.​A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."​A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says "Make me one with everything."​Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.​What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.​The broom swept the nation away.​I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.​What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back for seconds.​What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.​I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.​Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.​Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says “Do you smell fish?”​Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in france? There was nothing but des brie.​Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.​What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.​Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.​What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.​What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.​What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.​A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.​After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.​I used to be afraid of hurdles, but I got over it.​To write with a broken pencil is pointless.​I read a book on anti-gravity. I couldn’t put it down.​I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang but it came back to me.​What did the buffalo say to his son? Bison.​What should you do if you’re cold? Stand in the corner. It’s 90 degrees.​How does Moses make coffee? Hebrews it.​The energizer bunny went to jail. He was charged with battery.​What did the alien say to the pitcher of water? Take me to your liter.​What happens when you eat too many spaghettiOs? You have a vowel movement.​The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.​Sausage puns are the wurst.​What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.​How did Darth Vader know what luke was getting him for his birthday? He could sense his presence.​Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything.​What’s the difference between a bench, a fish, and a bucket of glue? You can’t tune a bench but you can tuna fish. I bet you got stuck on the bucket of glue part.​What’s it called when you have too many aliens? Extraterrestrials.​Want to hear a pizza joke? Nevermind, it’s too cheesy.​What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.​What do cows tell each other at bedtime? Dairy tales.​Why can’t you take inventory in Afghanistan? Because of the tally ban.​Why didn’t the lion win the race? Because he was racing a cheetah.​Why did the man dig a hole in his neighbor’s backyard and fill it with water? Because he meant well.​What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up? It becomes daytrogen.​What’s it called when you put a cow in an elevator? Raising the steaks.​What’s america’s favorite soda? Mini soda.​Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.​What kind of car does a sheep drive? A lamborghini, but if that breaks down they drive their SuBAHHru.

[kindcstguardian]

" The power’s out… Have any candles? " / @tradiitum​

  THE power had gone out and the room was relatively dark. he could barely see, but there was some semblance of what was around him. yuki didn’t exactly have his candles, but he did have a flashlight on his phone. initially going for his pocket, yuki stopped before realising this was am ample opportunity to have some fun with the other boy.

  “ i don’t have candles, but i do have a flashlight somewhere... “

  taking advantage of the dark he used his hands to rummage around before he reached the other, his hands first resting on his chest. he knew exactly what he wanted to do, so moving his hands down the other’s body, yuki went until he reached his goal: the front of the other’s pants. feeling it up, using the dark as an excuse to not know where things were.

  “ oh, what kind of flashlight is this? there’s no on switch. “ he chuckled. “ but it is kind of hard. “

  he knew it wasn’t a flashlight, but he couldn’t help but want to tease his fake boyfriend a little bit. might as well have as much fun with this deal as he could.

   It dawned a him later that nowadays someone rarely kept candles around, it was better to use a phone or a flashlight but the whole reason he asked was precisely due to his very own cellphone running out of battery     horrible decision from his side, really, but he forgot to bring a charger over and his upperclassman’s device had a different charger from his. It wasn’t his lucky day.

   “ Mn?  Oh, that’ll work, too ”, it was better even. Choosing to relax from the initial surprise, he let out a sigh he didn’t know he was holding. Don’t get him wrong, he wasn’t scared of the dark  but he didn’t feel safe . 

   That sentiment soon proved to be right when he could feel Hanazawa’s presence closer than he should be, hands finding their way on his body but unable to push him away as nothing bad was really happening. His heartbeat quickened and he could feel a blush creep from his neck to the tip of his ears, Daisuke was terrible under these circumstances and his current rigid posture was enough proof. “ I,I am sure that’s not..! ”, he let out a high-pitched noise prior to removing his hand from there, settling for intertwining their fingers and pulling him a bit closer. “ I’d appreciate it if, if you know..!  Just uhm, we could simply stay like this until it’s solved ”.

   Please, please listen to him. His whole face is flushed and he is nervous, though grateful for the darkness hidding that but his speech wasn’t any better.