#these two have a mountain of issues building up between them that jack tries to clumsily climb over and that bitty tries to cower behind

[parvuls]

The room is so silent it hurts. Jack’s eyes are wide and sad, his hand clenching into a fist and falling to press tightly against his thigh. The glass Eric dropped is shattered to pieces all over the kitchen floor, a puddle of water slowly spreading over the gleaming tiles.

“Sorry!” Eric blurts out finally, voice trembling, body trembling even harder. “I – I just –”

“It’s okay,” Jack says, but he still moves cautiously with his eyes unmoving from Eric, like Eric’s some wide animal that he might spook. “I shouldn’t have…”

He trails off, sentence unfinished. Eric gets it. There’s nothing he shouldn't have done; Jack never does anything wrong. It’s Eric who startles and flinches and gets lightheaded whenever the stranger he’s supposed to be engaged to tries to touch him.

“It’s fine, Bi–Eric.” Jack clears his throat, then crouches down to pick up the shards, smiling faintly up at Eric. “This floor's been through worse. It’s not even the first time I made you drop something, eh? Least this time it’s just water and not peanut butter.”

Eric has no idea what that means. Eric doesn't remember. After a moment, the tiny smile on Jack’s face fades away. He looks down at the floor, sighs quietly, and goes back to picking up broken glass with his bare hands.

[tintentrinkerin]

Title: Pink Pulse

Pairing: Sam/Dean

Rating: explicit

Tags: Bottom!Dean, Top!Sam, Witch OC, Magic, Demon Blood!Sam, Horny Idiots, Breeding kink, Dean has a magic pussy, slightly crack!fic

Summary: Dean wants to piss Ruby off and reclaim Sam as his. During a bender he meets Mandrake, a shady witch who offers him help.

Word Count: 4.5k

READ UNDER THE CUT OR ON AO3

When Dean Winchester regains his consciousness on this cold and foggy morning, he doesn’t really expect a surprise. He’s been drinking for a day… or maybe two, after Ruby, this damn bitch!, showed up again to lure Sam back. It’s her usual fucked up game, she does that when the angels aren’t looking. Sometimes, Dean knows it, Sam secretly calls her and when he sneaks out, Dean knows where’s going. And when he returns he stinks of blood and skank.

Dean’s head hurts like crazy. It takes several attempts for him to roll from his stomach to his back and then get a grip on the dumpster he’s lying next to and swing his body up. His feet feel jiggly and his stomach seems to be empty but he’s nauseous as hell. He hasn’t been robbed, that’s a good thing, his phone, his purse, even the keys to the Impala are still in his pockets. He checks his phone.

It’s 7.38am. Okay, great. He might’ve just passed out a few hours and if he’s super lucky, Baby is parked in close distance.

His phone shows several texts from Sam and from someone who calls themselves “Mandrake”. Doesn’t ring a bell. Not yet. Rather, Dean browses Sam’s texts which tone switches from mopey, to angry, to frightened and then there are over thirty missed calls. Holy shit, was Dean really gone for just a night? Dean tumbles out the alley and winks at the bright daylight he’s now exposed to. He might call Sam before he really freaks out. Some memories flare up in his brain about the damn fight, and that Dean insisted Sam was caught by Ruby so easily because he was underfucked and needed pussy a little too bad. He still thinks he’s right.

There is something to that word. Pussy. Dean loves saying it, Dean loves eating it, Dean loves everything revolving around it, but when he accused Sam of being a horny underfucked loser craving some, he felt bitter about it. A feeling that he had earlier, before Sam went to Stanford. Now Dean is a grown ass man with the Apocalypse on his heels, he has more pressing issues - or so it seems.

He phones Sam while stumbling through the alleys and trying to find Baby. Damn. His pants feel weird. Like he has a wedgie. In the front.

“Dean! For fuck’s sake, where are you?!”

Dean stops in his tracks and scratches his crotch.

“Chill out, Sammy. I’ll find out where I am, I just need to find the damn car.”

“I was a second away from letting Castiel locate you.”

“Forget the damn angel, I’m on my way.”

Sam scoffs into the phone.

“You’re such an idiot. Do you have any idea how worried I was?”

“No, no, I don’t. I thought you’re sucking pussy all night.”

Sam hangs up without another word.

There it is again, this fucking thought. That Sam could be out fucking Ruby while he’s been… what? What exactly happened between nightfall and now? There was a fight, not physical, but Dean has been so fucking close to slap the bitch across the face. Sam stopped him.

Dean finds the pub where he supposedly was drinking his anger away. It’s closed. The “Full Moon”. And it’s been a full moon last night. How damn right poetic. His phone rings.

“Yo, Sammy - wanna apologize and admit you’ve been eatin’ her all night?”

A female voice on the phone laughs. Dean frowns.

“Who’s this?”

“Mandrake. Don’t you remember?”

“I remember jack. Where’d you get my number?”

Dean knows, he should hang up. This is maybe a very bad idea. Give too much away. This woman sounds familiar but a lot of women do, he’s not exactly in celibacy since he’s back from Hell.

“I got it from you, idiot. And I got something else.”

Dean follows the main road for as long as he somehow feels he’s been here before. He surely didn’t drive far from the motel but far enough that Sam wouldn’t find him. This is so not usual for Dean. Being a mopey idiot? Yes. Getting drunk? Also very much yes. It itches in Dean’s pants and when he makes sure no one’s looking he sticks his hands in his boxers.

Holy shit. What the fuck.

Sam can’t focus. He sits at the motel room’s table, trying to do research, but he just can’t block out all of the things that distract him. The flickering TV. The humming of the air conditioning system. His fingernails clicking on his laptop’s keyboard. The thoughts. All of his thoughts combined as sinister and hilarious and frightening they are at the same time. Dean’s been gone for two damn nights. Okay, now he’s back, sitting on the sofa, manspreading. Only in his now deflated looking underwear. Watching something on TV that Sam can’t process. He sees the images, but his mind is racing like crazy around all the other things. The goosebumps on his own arms, the sound of his own breath. He feels the harsh and fast pumping of his heart, circulating his blood. He can feel his pupils dilate. And his legs won’t hold still. He has to move somehow.

Ruby’s blood wasn’t enough last time. The fuck wasn’t enough. Everything aches inside Sam. Anger is like a fist in his stomach but he isn’t quite sure if the anger is the fuel of everything.

He knows Dean hates it when he bounces like this, his legs are shaking and damn, something is pressing against the zipper of his jeans. Of course it’s not something. Thing is, he wants to ignore it.

Dean seems to be calm right now, but he’s sitting right under the air conditioning, the blow is ruffling his hair while he stares on the screen, his arms crossed, legs spread out. He scratches himself. There. Sam follows the movement and gulps.

And then, shit, Sam, stop fucking looking at your brother’s crotch! - but he can’t stop! - Dean isn’t scratching anymore. Two of his fingers press right between his thighs, the fabric rustles, and it turns wet. The fucking boxers get wet. Dean doesn’t even seem to notice, but he should. It’s his body! It’s his-

Sam can’t even think it without feeling a rush of hot blood and sharp imaginary knives stabbing his lower stomach. Pulse spikes up. Pupils dilated. Mouth waters. Sam tries to hide a grunt but he can’t.

“Sammy, you good?”, Dean asks, still rubbing his-

Sam looks at him. He must look like a drug addict in withdrawal. Well, maybe he is. He’s maybe addicted to- it’s all Ruby’s fault. She came when Dean died and she lured him in, now he can’t stop thinking of her warm salty blood in his mouth. Or his teeth on her skin. His tongue-

“Fuck.”

Dean looks irritated.

“Hey, look. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you angry, I don’t even remember most of the fight. It’s only twelve or thirteen days from now and I’m-- I’m normal again.”

Sam inhales. Dean’s scent was building over the last couple of hours and now it’s so thick, musky and intoxicating that it’s hard to ignore it.

“Shut up and take a shower.”

Dean now closes his legs and presses his hands on his thighs. He looks at Sam with furrowed eyebrows.

“There’s nicer ways to tell me I still stink of garbage.”

If it was only fucking garbage! Sam is so close to yell it, to jump up, throw the table over or punch a wall.

“You don’t stink.”

“Then what?”

Dean gets up and walks towards the table. His chest is heaving, Sam notices. Breathing heavy. Such a broad chest, covered in goosebumps. Sam feels incredibly sick all of a sudden.

“I can smell…”, Sam needs to cover his mouth and nose with his hand. The closer Dean comes the worse it gets.

“Now tell me already, if I don’t stink anymore what’s the problem?”

“Dean, I could smell a chipmunk’s fart from miles away, that is a problem.”

Sam needs to breathe. He jumps up and throws himself over to the window and opens it. He should’ve done that way earlier, he realizes. But Dean is behind him now.

“Unless we have chipmunks with flatulences in here, I still don’t have a clue what’s going on.”

Dean touches Sam’s shoulder. Adrenaline. Dopamine. Oh holy shit, the whole hormonal time bomb erupts inside Sam’s body. When he turns around, he’s sure he looks super frightening to Dean, but he can’t stop, won’t stop and pulls Dean close. Dean freezes. A shaky little laugh.

“Sammy… what…”

“I can smell your pussy”, Sam growls, his lips on Dean’s skin.

Dean doesn’t smell like a woman at all, everything about him is testosterone, if there wasn’t this tiny anomaly about him.

That he got himself hexed by a shady witch.

There’s no struggle against Sam’s force when he pushes Dean against the table and then -- as if he waited for it -- Dean hops on that table, opens his legs for Sam.

“What are you doing?”, he still asks, his green eyes big and glassy, lips a cute pout.

Sam has no answer to that than before: “Your smell drives me mad. I need…”

What does Sam need? His brother? His magical pussy? Or wouldn't it be easier to run away to mountains nearby and scream from the bottom of his lungs until he passed out?

Decisions, decisions.

Dean's face has the colour of fresh pink guava juice, his freckles pop, his eyes pop. His lips part for a second. His tongue flicks. No Sam knows exactly what he needs.

“Do you need it? My pussy?” Dean whispers. He slowly pulls his boxer briefs down to his ass but then Sam needs to help, Dean clings on him, Sam pulls. Dean lays across the - thank GOD, long table and is spread out like a delicious meal, while Sam frees Dean from the fabric. It's more ripping then pulling and Sam groans, shit, he's ripped them apart. But then, when Dean opens his legs even more, lying here on his back like a beetle, helpless and weirdly pliant, the odor of Dean's pussy makes Sam cuss and tumble.

“Fuck, Dean…”

“Huh? Not good?”

Sam is out of words, super-ego just logged out with an ‘I have no power here’ and damn right it doesn't!

Dean's pussy is perfect. Another grunt. Holy shit. Instead of an answer for Dean, Sam kneels between Dean's wonderfully wide spread legs. His brother is the definition of a bottom here. Just opening his legs for anyone. Even Sam. The smell is intense and rich, Sam knows it from the other women he's been with... but Dean has one perfect twist. He smells like Sam's brother, too. Musky and citric. And that makes Sam go lizard brain.

“I need to taste you.”

Dean now even slides closer, his legs lie on Sam's shoulder. Sam jerks up and leans over the table, over Dean's naked body. This pussy is just the material of Sam's wet dreams. His nose rubs Dean's skin under his belly button and Dean moans.

“Do it, Sammy. Fucking do it or I'll push your face in my pussy myself.”

Well. Not the worst threat he's ever received. Sam's hand trails between Dean's legs and when he feels the wetness, a fucking intense wetness that is spread all over. Even the thighs are a little glossy from Dean's fluids.

Sam needs to see. Going down, he pushes Dean's legs apart even wider and dives in between these legs. Pink and juicy, dripping wet. The smells almost knocks him out, makes his mouth water and a generous drop of drool falls from his lips. He cannot fucking take that anymore. And Sam pushes Dean closer to him, winds his arms under Dean's now trembling legs and -

Dean cries out, muscles flex, he kicks out, then sinks down again. Just one damn lick.

Sam is in such rage that he can't be fully a gentleman here and do everything slowly, patiently. He's hungry and his primal urge has taken over. Greedy, he licks up and down Dean's labia, tongue working and opening his brother's pussy up and Dean sounds so fucking hot. No girl or guy ever made him sound so needy and so desperate for a fuck. He tastes just as good as Sam imagines when he sucks the thick and sweet wetness from Dean's pussy, sucks on the folds while his fingers run up and down Dean's thighs and Sam needs one free hand now, his thumb rubbing just above the hood of the clit, other finger just teasing his entrance. Not really pushing it in, just a little rubbing while Sam sucks and licks and circles Dean's clit with his tongue.

Dean feels like he is losing his mind. Not only that Sam really is between his legs and gives him mind blowing oral sex, fuck, Dean loves it. He thought Sam was angry but the way he devoured Dean's pussy, anger was definitely gone. He can't stop moaning and winding and his hands in Sam's hair. When he looks down and sees his brother's face up and down, he looks very focused on what he's doing. And in Dean feelings build up, it's a heat and a tumbling, never felt like this.

In a moment of taking a deep breath and Sam looks up, Dean's juices run down his chin and in the collar of his shirt. “Dean, you taste so good…” he says and bites in Dean's thigh. Doesn't hurt. “Better than anything.”

Dean shudders. He needs more.

“Sammy, keep going.”

Sam smirks, his thumb circling Dean’s now swollen and hot clit, his whole pussy is slick with his wetness. No woman Sam ever had sex got that wet.

His thumb is gentle, a perfect rhythm of circling. Stopping. Circling. Stopping. Little pressure. Dean’s body feels on fire.

“Is that what the girls tell you when you go down on them?” Sam asks, his voice rustling leaves.

Dean can’t help but utter a short, almost hysterical laugh.

“I never really listened.”

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk, Sam clicks his tongue.

“You should’ve. Not only that. Listen to what they say but what-”

Sam finger slides in Dean’s wet pussy with one fast but well adjusted movement. Dean winds and arches his back. Tries to get Sam’s finger away and yet…

“-when they want to escape you, you’re doing it right.”

“Sam, for fuck’s sake! I had enough sex with enough people to know the god damn basics!”

But feeling it himself gives him a whole new sense for it. Sam’s finger moves, wet sounds, in and out and it takes not even a blink and Dean begs for more. Two fingers, holy shit, Sam’s fingers are thick and long and when he starts fucking Dean’s pussy with them while sucking on his clit, the impulse to turn on his stomach and either crawl away or present his naked ass to invite Sam to fuck him -- Dean wants both!

Sam’s ‘come hither’ movements tighten the knot in Dean’s stomach. That’s not what an orgasm feels like for him when he’s about to blow. This is so much deeper, feel tight and hot right up to his lower belly. The noises Sam makes as he sucks Dean’s clit are downright vulgar. And the faster Dean’s breath goes, the more he tries to wind away, Sam’s hand around his upper thigh is a bench vice - he won’t let Dean go. Not unless…

Dean can feel it. He whines “fuck, Sammy, ‘m gonna cum…” and this would be the same moment he came. If Sam just sucked his dick. But this is… slower. And Sam goes absolutely frantic, like a boxer he just goes for Dean’s weak spots and he has definitely found them now and he rubs Dean’s insides, sucks his clit, damn how big can such a tiny thing swell? And Dean fucks himself on these fingers, his rhythm clashes against Sam’s, the bigger the friction, the better. His fingers clench in Sam’s hair and then finally, Dean comes, he feels like exploding, black dots in his sight and he has to close his eyes. His heartbeat goes straight up to his throat, only faint moans, a ‘holy fu…’ but he can’t even finish a fucking curse. Sam won’t stop fucking him, but slower now, more gentle. His tongue presses against Dean’s clit. Dean feels Sam’s breath on his wet skin. Everything tingles still, Dean’s hornystupidmanbrain is on standby, extremities just twitch helplessly.

When Dean opens his eyes he only sees the dirty brown ceiling and the dim light.

“I need a smoke”, Dean blurts out. Oh, the sweet refusal to acknowledge what just happened.

“Fuck, you clenched so hard I thought you would break my fingers.”

Sam sounds so deep, so gravely. Does Ruby hear that a lot?

Dean laughs, trying not to choke on his jealousy. Sam just ate him out. His brother. Just. Ate. Him. Out! Dean feels like he took drugs, heavy, light, euphoric. Not tired. This doesn’t seem to end in a hangover.

“Sam. I really, really wanted that”, another stupid thing to stay. But Dean’s stupid, especially when things are about Sam.

Sam scoffs. “I guessed, otherwise you would’ve punched me to a pulp.”

“Damn right…”

Dean covers his face with his arm, the dim light is too much right now. His breath hasn’t even calmed down yet and somehow, he has to admit, he’s not satisfied. The climax gave him a solid blank for a couple seconds but even now he’s throbbing and wet, Sam’s spit hasn’t made him any drier.

Dean is still a powerhouse of sex, Sam can’t deny it. Resting between his legs doesn’t help but he doesn’t dare to get up and reveal that he is rock-hard and ready. Eating his brother out has been a wild ride already, something he maybe dreamed of as a teenager (but even then - who would imagine Dean as a girl?), of sucking him off like he saw when Dean brought a girl or a dude home. Sam needs to get himself up, slowly, Dean is lying there, arm covering his eyes, but a smile on his face. He grins like an idiot. It’s cute.

Silence.

Awkward.

Sam doesn’t know what to say now, he’s lost control, because his brother grew a pussy. How could you ever explain that? Gladly he doesn’t have to.

Dean gets up, his eyes look teary, but not in the sad I’m-about-to-cry way. He rather pulls Sam close and whispers, something so idiotic, something so innocent, and yet something that makes Sam’s boner grow even more.

“You didn’t even kiss me first.”

“Sorry”, Sam replies, he’s just as stupid.

Dean makes it easy for Sam, wrapping his arms around Sam’s neck and kissing him. This is just another short circuit for him and before Sam realizes what he’s doing, his vision turns red. His instincts and his lust are wired to the taste and smell of blood - and Ruby. This is not Ruby. Gladly, this is not Ruby. It’s Dean. The one he thought of when it first happened, the one he was mourning so deeply. Now he gets what he wants from the person he wants. Bingo.

His brother is heavy, but Sam’s strength is to be reckoned with these days. It’s easy to lift him up - Dean’s legs wind around his hips, his ass feels so great. Firm. Dean moans in his mouth when Sam throws him on one of the motel beds and follows, laying his full weight on his brother.

“Sammy…”

Damn, Dean’s fumbling on his zipper.

“You’re big.”

Scoff.

“Am I?”

“Yeah.” Dean looks really intrigued. Sam lets it happen. Dean slides a hand in his boxer briefs and squeezes his raging dick.

“Fuck. Dean.”

These big pleading eyes. Sometimes Dean looks at him like this. And he looks younger than Sam now. Needy. Small. Vulnerable. Sam can never say no when Dean looks like this. He kicks out of his jeans and Dean is so damn impatient. Fabric tears on the seams. Sam doesn’t care.

The way Dean strokes him, the close they are it would be easy, way too easy just to slide inside Dean. Feel his wetness, how tight. How hot. And greedy. Swallowing Sam’s cock like he did with his fingers. Dean stops him. Sam’s heart sinks. It hurts.

“Take everything off”, Dean just says, “I don’t want to feel like quick fuck-”

Sam just has to laugh.

“Never”, he vows and then pulls the shirt over his head and throws it over his shoulder.

The way he towers over Dean, ready to mount, he feels like a steam breathing monster. He really shouldn’t do that. He’s spiralling down to something he never wanted to be. But he can be with Dean this way. Just this once…?

More than once…?

Dean’s legs around his hips trap him now, he can feel the slick wet folds on his cock already and all he can do now is just thrust in. Around his fingers Dean already felt like heaven and hell on earth, but this. Sam hisses, he feels like growing fangs, he digs his teeth in Dean’s neck, he tastes salt and sweat, Dean whimpers but doesn’t complain.

“God… so deep…”, he says. Like he can’t believe it.

“Hurts?”

Dean makes a sound that says ‘nuh-uh’ and that’s enough for Sam. He even pulls Sam closer, his legs force his cock deeper inside this fucking wet and inviting pussy.

This is so much better than Ruby. He needs to fucking forget her. The deeper he sinks, the harder he thrusts and sweat runs down in his eyes and makes them sting, he forgets about what all of this could mean for them. He just wants to fuck Dean silly. And Dean clings on him like he’s drowning in this feeling, no matter how harsh Sam is. His hips are snapping, damn, it must hurt, right? He eventually slows down to kiss Dean sloppily and open mouthed, their moans intertwining and building a cacophony of sounds, loud and rough, soft at the same time. Sam manages to slow down a little and Dean relaxes.

“I want you to fuck me from behind”, Dean mumbles on Sam’s lips, trying to hide the fact he’s blushing deep.

Sam huffs.

“Yeah. Whatever you want.” Babe.

He almost called Dean babe. Sam winds out, slides out, winces. It feels so good, Dean’s so wet, Dean’s just perfect.

On all fours, arms spread out like a silly yoga pose, back stretched… Sam definitely dreamt of this more than once. This time he pushes in slowly, and Dean arches his back. His breath staggers, yelps. But yet again, after a second of adjusting, Dean starts moving. Fucking himself on Sam’s cock and saying such nasty, irritating, hot things. He mewls and begs for more and then.

“God, Sammy, cum inside me!”

Sam stops. Dean repeats. “Cum inside me!”

There’s no way Sam can deny him, he’s close since Dean started working him like he did it a thousand times already. Sam grips those hips tight, leaves white marks, then pink long traces of his fingernails as he snaps in Dean’s pussy, shit, these sounds. Juicy and full, and Dean’s longing. This is the best fuck. This is it. This is what will blow Sam’s mind for hours, the whole night. Days.

“You want me to breed you, big bro?”, he hears himself say, the animalistic side, awake, fully in rage makes him say it, he can’t stop. “You want me to pump my load in ya?”

Dean nods frantically, his mewling and crying is so pretty. He’s still bouncing on Sam’s cock, his wonderful, round and firm ass, perfect for slapping. And Sam does. Dean whimpers, “please, more, Sammy, more!”

Sam claws at Dean’s hair, pulls it, overstretching his neck. He’s so out of control he might fuck Dean all bruised and sore.

“Touch your clit, c’mon babe, rub it. Cum on my cock and you’ll get it. I’ll knock you up”, whoa.

Dean does it, his hand traces down his body and he starts rubbing his swollen, red, overstimulated clit, squeezes it between his fingers and starts rubbing, circling.. hard to find the thing that gets you going, right? But soon, Dean writhes even more, his voice turns higher. Legs start shaking. “I think I’m gonna-”

He cums on Sam’s cock, clenching and moaning, getting so wet it drenches Sam’s crotch and runs down both their legs. The feeling is amazing, Sam’s checked out once again, babbling “Good boy, good boy” and then shoots a generous load of cum, he tumbles and hips snap and snap, until he’s finished.

They collapse, sweaty and gasping for air, Dean makes incoherent post orgasm noises.

Another period of silence that is only interrupted by the usual motel room sounds that creep back in Sam’s ears. He wants to pull out but Dean claws on his arm, his legs trapping Sam’s.

“No, no. Not yet. Please not yet.”

Sam sinks back and gives Dean what he needs, the closeness. Even though after some time fluids will dry and get cold. It will get sticky and that’s when Sam will have the urge to shower.

Not with Dean. They stay like this for minutes before Dean turns around, Sam lets him. They lay beside each other and the whole scene is hilariously and bizarrely romantic. They keep kissing and Dean’s like the devourer of Sam’s kisses and affections.

Dean rubs his nose on Sam’s, humming. He seems so proud of himself, so satisfied, but then his eyes widen.

“Oh. Shit.”

He gets up on one elbow and looks at the mess they made. Cum is leaking out of him and he wipes it from his thigh. Tastes it.

“Dean, really?”

“Hey. It’s only natural. Have you never been curious?”

Sam shrugs. “Yeah I was, but I never thought you would be.”

“You know this breeding kink thing. I did that before but I- I mean. Hot fantasy, works with anal but… Do I need an emergency pill now?”

Dean’s face is deadpan serious. Sam clears his throat to hide that he actually wants to laugh. How could he know?

“Just to be sure, I would say a magical pussy isn’t spunk proof. We could get to a pharmacy ...”

Dean falls silent and leans into Sam. There’s so many things unsaid and he’s not in the mood to unpack it. Sam is reluctant either. It’s enough for him to hold Dean close, pet his hair and keep kissing him over and over until they feel in the mood again. That Dean’s been hexed is a secondary matter. They will enjoy it as long it lasts.

Sam goes down on Dean, even when he’s still leaking cum, he just swallows it, he doesn’t mind. And when they get tangled into each other, both thinking ‘well, if he needs an emergency pill we’ll make it worth it’.

Consequences? Which consequences?

Apocalypse might come, they might enjoy every fucked up delightful thing along the way.

[an-unknown-writers-world]

The Perfect Slope

Day Eleven: Sledding

Part of @panicfob​ 25 Days of Christmas Challenge

Warnings: None

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (First Person, nameless)

Characters: Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson

Word Count: 1340

A/N:  This one is a little weird (to me at least), not sure where I was going or what I was doing. But this is what came out. I hope you enjoy it! If you missed any of the previous ten days you can find them here - Masterlist. And as always, thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to read this. 

----------------------------------------------------------

“I’m not going to have any feeling in my limbs before this is over.” I stood shaking in an attempt to keep warm.

“Stop being a party pooper,” Sam replied.

“I thought you were the one who loved snow?” Bucky added.

“I do, it's beautiful and makes everything look magical. But that doesn’t mean I want to stand in a foot of snow in the middle of the night.”

“Um, it’s not the middle of the night,” Sam looked at his wrist as if he had a watch on, “It’s fun o’clock.”

Bucky laughed as he patted snow down into a firm mound.

The blizzard conditions had passed and the snow had temporarily quit falling. Fourteen inches of white powder covered the ground creating a beautiful winter wonderland. The hill behind the compound looked like a slide all on its own, but now Bucky and Sam were using various shovels to flatten and smooth the snow for the “perfect sled slope”.

“How long until you’re done?” I pleaded.

“Five-ish minutes,” Bucky replied. “You could wait inside.”

“Someone needs to supervise the two of you, you already tried to build this towards the lake,” I replied skeptical of their sudden bonding. “This perfect sled slope,” I mocked the name, “seems like a perfect way to get hurt.”

Bucky stood up and leaned the shovel against the four-wheeler. “We’ll be fine.”

“You maybe, you’re a super-soldier. He’s very breakable.”

“So are you,” Sam said throwing snow at me.

“I’m not getting on that thing.”

“What if we did it together?” Bucky asked coming to stand in front of me.

I shook my head, “You know that irrational fear you have about ice skating?”

“Yeah,” He nodded,

“Well, I have one too. But with sleds.”

Bucky’s forehead squished together in confusion, “You have a fear of your hand getting taken off by a sled?”

I laughed, “No, but that I’ll crash and break my neck. It’s evolved since my childhood, I used to think my head would pop off.”

“Like a barbie?” Sam interrupted.

I shrugged, “what’s it to you bird brain?”

“We’ll do it together,” Bucky took my gloved hand. “I won’t let you crash.”

“It’s done,” Sam stated.

“He’s going first.” I pointed at Sam.

From the top of the hill, you could go one of two ways, into the courtyard of the compound or into the lake. It had been below freezing for almost three weeks now, so the lake was frozen, not enough to skate on but you could definitely walk along the edges. When I came outside to find out what they were doing they were building the slope towards the lake, neither of them could see the issue since the lake was frozen, it took almost ten minutes of arguing to get them to change the direction.

The slope was at least thirty yards long, they had done a pretty good job defining a line and smoothing it. It was an impressive feat that they accomplished in just a short hour and a half; it was equally impressive that they did it with minimal snowball fighting. There were three sleds next to the four-wheeler but there was no way I was going down alone.

Sam sat on his sled at the top of the slope, the smile on his face was that of a small child on Christmas morning.

“If you sit there much longer, I’m going to push you,” Bucky stated.

I stepped around Bucky so I could see the full length of the slope before walking over to Sam. Turning my back to him, I made eye contact with Bucky and winked.

“Hey Sam, remember a few months back when you scared me in the gym, and I fell off the treadmill?” I questioned.

“Is that how you got hurt?” Bucky asked.

“What about it?” Sam challenged.

“I told you that I was going to get you back for it.”

Sam looked at me and then Bucky, he opened his mouth to speak, but it was already too late I shoved the sled with my foot, hard enough to start it down the slope. It took him a few feet to finally get stable on the sled, but when he did, he slid at a quick pace. Bucky was laughing so hard he was grabbing at his chest.

“Bet he didn’t see that coming,” I said to Bucky.

“I didn’t see that coming,” He replied honestly. “Is that how you ended up on crutches?”

“Yep, it was unintentional, and I knew better than to run with my headphones in. That’s why we have a giant sound system in the gym.”

Sam fell off the side of the slope in a fit of laughter.

“Clearly he’s not mad,” I chuckled.

Bucky picked up the sled in his hand, my nerves started to go wild. I knew he would do everything to keep me safe, and I just watched Sam go down without any problem. I kept trying to silently remind myself it would be fine.

“Hey you, c’mere,” Bucky said pulling me into his side.

I laid my head on his shoulder breathing in his warmth.

“I’m not going to let anything happen to you,” He promised.

“I know,” I mumbled into his chest.

Sam was still laughing as he sat on his sled at the bottom of the hill.

“I’m taking the world’s hottest shower after this is over and going straight to bed,” I whined.

Bucky laughed softly, “Guess that means you’re not cashing in on that bet tonight?”

“Nope, you’re just going to have to stew on it, waiting and not knowing when I’m going to.” I pulled back smiling up at him.

He kissed my forehead and pulled away.

“Are you gonna go or what?” Sam called out.

“Yeah, yeah. Aren’t you supposed to fly south for the winter or something?” Bucky shouted back as he climbed onto the sled.

I laughed waiting for him to signal for me. It didn’t take long for him to settle and hold out his hand for me. I sat in front of him, between his legs, his one hand wrapped around my front, he squeezed ever so softly making sure I was held securely to him.

“Ready?” He asked.

One last deep breath.

“Ready,” I replied.

He pushed off, sending us down the slope at a way to fast of a speed. The weight of two people and the perfectly smooth snow made for a quick trip. When Sam got to the bottom his speed dwindled and he scooted off, our speed it wasn’t dwindling. The mountain of snow at the bottom of the hill came up quick, but not so quick that a scream didn’t escape as we crashed into it.

It was soft and dry snow, so it didn’t hurt, but it certainly wasn’t comfortable. Bucky laughed as he pulled me close to him in the snow. It was hard to be mad at him for crashing when it was completely unavoidable, not to mention the amount of snow in his hair made him look like Jack Frost. It quickly became a fit of laughter between the three of us, there wasn’t anything that funny. Late nights, well, in this case, three am, and being overtired could lead to these kinds of fits, they were common for me.

When they finally settled and we all sat amongst the snow, I turned to Bucky with a smile and a small poorly shaped snowball hidden behind my back; he leaned down at placed a quick peck to lips. As he pulled away, I threw the snowball at him.

“That’s for making us crash.”

Sam burst into laughter again. “This is my queue to go get the shovels.” He got up and started to walk away.

Bucky kissed me again, this time with more heat and need. When we finally pulled apart, I laid my head against his shoulder.

“I’d do it again if meant I could hold you so close.” He whispered in my ear.

[sharpnothashtag]

The Good Ship CrushWay, Chapter 14

Scene: Conference Room, Picard, KJ, Bev, Geordi, Data, Worf, and DeAnna are all there.

KJ: In the basement, where we can only assume Mayble was hiding when she sent the distress signal, we found extremely concentrated levels of Lyantrium. Picard: Can you be more specific?  What do you mean by “extremely high”? Data: A normal concentration of Lyantirum in well-traveled space is about 100 parts per million.  What we found in that basement was 10,000 parts per million.  It is relatively surprising Commander Janeway and Dr. Crusher were not staring into the face of a Lyantirum wormhole. Picard: I’m grateful they weren’t.  What would cause that kind of Lyantirum buildup? KJ: My theory is a weapon of sorts--one harvests the Lyantirum, calculates the exact coordinates to place the Lyantirum, and then shoots.   Geordi: But the Borg have to know that Lyantirum is a very unstable way of traveling. KJ: My guess is they don’t care.  They must use the Lyantirum wormhole as a means to travel TO somewhere.  Since the Borg never retreat, they do not need an escape route.  The wormhole does not have to be stable for any longer than it takes for them to get from Point A to Point B. Worf: Is there any way to predict where they are going to use it next so that we may have a tactical advantage against them? Geordi: If I am looking at these schematics correctly, no.  We can try to build that weapon ourselves by cleaning up the mess that they left here, but that’s about it. Worf: Why did they come to that basement? Bev: The family would put up the least amount of a struggle if they caught them off guard, but the Borg don’t really care about that, do they? KJ: My crew member, Seven, is the biggest stickler for efficiency and time management I have ever seen.  If there were a way save time, the Borg would take it. Picard: If they came directly to the basement, how did Mayble send the distress signal? KJ: I think she was out playing.  I think they all were outside, and then the Borg came from inside their houses. Worf: The family room was torn apart, but it did not look like a struggle.  It looked like there were intruders that sabotaged everything important to the family. KJ: That brings me to the next point: this is the Borg, but there is something wrong.  These Borg are angry.  Picard: Why do you say that? KJ: I have seen Borg destruction before.  It’s cold...empty.  It served a purpose.  This did not.  The faces of all the families in the pictures were slashed: the portraits torn apart with bare hands. Picard: Data, will you do a bit of research on the families?  Maybe we can find some connection between them and the Borg...maybe find an enemy that could have been assimilated. Data: I have already checked.  The families were all human, and they have a common ancestry. Picard: And that is? Data: They are all French, Captain. DeAnna: Why go after the French, Data? Data: I do not know, Counselor.   DeAnna: What was the purpose of the colony? Data: They were there for archaeological study.  The ruins on Jouret IV have fascinated many for some time now, but this group was the first to decide to actually study them in great detail. Picard: I was looking forward to getting to see them while we were in the vicinity.  These are all confusing findings, but I know we can piece something together.  Commander, you and Data should study all the known Borg attacks--see if there was any other time when the Borg displayed such anger.  Geordi, you should prepare more advanced schematics of this Lyantirum weapon--see if you can find a way to predict where they are going to strike next by digging deeper into how to build this weapon.  Divert any of the necessary crew from Engineering.  Dismissed. (everyone gets up to go except Worf and DeAnna, who exchange glances, nod, and approach Picard.) Worf: Captain, DeAnna and I would like to have a word with you. Picard: Certainly. DeAnna: Don’t you think it’s odd that they HAPPEN to be going after French archaeologists? Picard: I was trying to believe that was a coincidence. Worf: Do not be a fool, Captain.  You are an important man, and the Borg would have a great advantage on the Federation if you were to be assimilated. DeAnna: What Worf really means is...well...we’re worried.  And we want to protect you in the best way we know how. Picard: And that is? Worf: Please allow me to be your personal security detail.  I can stand watch over you at all times. Picard: Worf, you will need to rest occasionally. Worf: I can sleep in your quarters when you sleep. Picard: I certainly appreciate the gesture, but just posting someone at my door is plenty. Worf: Their weapon is precise enough to get into someone’s room; how can we be sure they will not get to you while we are standing watch outside? Picard: Mr. Worf, you may accompany me every second of every day until we have cleared up this mess, but I will not allow you to sleep with me.  That is the end of this discussion. DeAnna: (grabbing Worf’s arm and trying to reassure him that he did try) Thank you, Captain. Picard: Now.  Is there anything else? DeAnna: I did want to ask you one more thing. Picard: Yes? DeAnna: Would you preside over our wedding? Picard: (smiling) Of course. DeAnna: We are still working out the details...I’m not sure there’s ever been a Klingon-Betazoid wedding. Picard: Nor will there ever be again. Worf: What is important is that my heart beats only for this woman (looks lovingly at DeAnna).  And I want the whole universe to know it. Picard: And know it they shall.  Now, I have some studying of my own to do.  DeAnna, go help Kathryn and Data research the Borg attacks.  Worf, I suppose you’re going to stay here with me? Worf: Yes, sir. Picard: DeAnna, you’re dismissed.

The holodeck, Bev and KJ’s nightly walk.

KJ: (jogging, carrying coats) I’m here!   Bev: It took you long enough. KJ: I’m sorry!  I got caught up--Wolf 359 took a lot of debate on the anger issue. Bev: Fair enough.  What’ll it be tonight, m’lady? KJ: There’s a spot in Finland we haven’t tried yet.  I brought coats so we won’t get too cold. Bev: Great idea.  (pushes the buttons. door opens, Bev gestures.) After you. KJ: (smiles, nods) Thank you. (KJ enters, Bev follows.  The room is transformed into a mountain in Finland where the Northern Lights are out and in full force.  Both are silenced immediately as this natural miracle dances around them. They walk in silence for a moment.) KJ: There’s something about this that just makes everything make sense. Bev: Yeah?  Why are the Borg so angry, then? KJ: (rolls her eyes) That’s not what I mean.  I mean...everything is in its place. Bev: I know what you mean.  These programs are how I survived after Jack died. KJ: How long ago was that? Bev: 11 years.  It was an away mission...Jean-Luc had to tell Wesley that his dad died a hero, but all Wesley heard was that his hero was dead.  He’s 16 now, and he still struggles with it some days. KJ: I lost my father at a young age, too.  Growing up without a father figure is very difficult, and I can understand what he’s going through. Bev: Jack used to say if something ever happened to him that I shouldn’t feel guilty when I moved on. KJ: And how do you feel?  When you do date, that is. Bev: I haven’t dated anyone.  It’s been 11 years, and I am just now getting to the point where I might be able to. (They stop and sit on a rock near the top of the mountain.) You mean the world to me, Kate.  You’re my best friend. KJ: You’re mine, too, Bev. Bev: If you got assimilated, I’m not sure how long I would last. KJ: ...Bev, you’re not talking about-- Bev: I’ve lost a lot in my life, Kate.  My parents, my husband...I couldn’t live if I lost you, too.  (KJ hugs her close.) My grandmother gave me that copy of Frankenstein after my parents died.  I read it then, and I realized that everyone questions why they’re here, and that it’s okay to do that. KJ: You know, when I first read it, I realized that there’s no hurt that can’t be overcome. Bev: How exactly did you come to that? KJ: At the end of the book when the narrator meets the monster for the first time, he is definitely startled at first, but after a minute or two, he collects himself and invites the monster in. In life, I’ve found that if I sit with my demons, they aren’t as scary, and they don’t have as much control over my life. And, sometimes my demons are just as misunderstood as I am. Bev: Promise me something, Kate. KJ: Yeah? Bev: Promise me you’re going to do all you can to help me sit down with my demons.  I’m not usually open about my depression...only Jean-Luc and DeAnna really know. KJ: I’m not going anywhere, Bev.  Nothing can take me away from you.  I love you. (looks at Bev and wipes away a tear from her eye)

Bev takes KJ’s face in her hands and kisses her.  Bev’s tongue strokes the roof of KJ’s mouth slowly.  KJ returns the favor. Bev lays her down on the rock and unbuttons her coat.

KJ: Beverly, are you sure you want this? Bev: (stroking KJ’s hair) More than anything in the entire universe. (Bev unbuttons the coat, and then unbuttons her own.  She lays down with KJ and uses her coat as a blanket.  They hold each other for a while.) KJ: I’m getting kind of cold.  Do you want to take this back to my place? Bev: That’s enough for now.  We both need some rest. KJ: I guess so.  I just thought-- Bev: I know.  And I do want that...just not tonight. (KJ nods, and they share their last kiss for the evening.) I’ll see you tomorrow morning? KJ: Of course.  Sleep well, Bev. Bev: Sleep well, Kate.

[angelinarecs]

Stargate SG-1 Rec - *Updated*

More Stargate fics! Because I can never get enough of this show. You can find my full rec list here. 

Organized by pairing (or gen), and then alphabetized by title. Summaries (which have been copied from their respective stories) and descriptions are provided. Notation at the end of the description indicates if a story is completed or a WIP.

Gen

Arachne’s Chase - “Sergeant, fire in short bursts. We don’t have many rounds, try to make each shot count, okay?” Sam looked him in the eyes; she was totally calm. Uncertainty had gone now; she knew what she was fighting. She wasn’t too sure on their odds of surviving, but then that wasn’t anything new. “You can do this, Sergeant.” She watched as his face set in a determined expression. It wasn’t a face suited for ferocity but she gave him credit for trying. Drama/Adventure. Sam and Walter get stuck off world trying to hold their own against giant spiders. Walter keeps freaking out and Sam just wants to get home. A good look at both Sam and Walter’s characters as well as a decently written action scene. One-shot.

Fortitude - This was written for a LJ Sam Carter Ficathon, and deals with the first mission for Sam after her encounter with Jolinar. Adventure. Sam tries to prove her mettle in the field, both to herself and her teammates. She fails to take care of herself and follow orders in the process. A good look into what must have been a trying first mission after everything that happened with Jolinar. One-shot.

Infirmary After - Sam’s turn to concentrate on breathing. Enough time passed that Janet was wondering if she’d even answer, wondering what she’d do if there was no answer. “Embarrassed,” Sam said at last, her voice too low to carry much beyond the bed. “Ashamed. Not so much that it happened - I really did get my head around that years ago, played it over and over and over until I desensitized myself to the possibility - but that they saw. That it happened in front of… of… That they’re never going to look at me again without thinking of it.” Drama. Compelling and hard-hitting, this story doesn’t need to be graphic to touch on the horror and also high likelihood of being raped in the dangerous world of SG1. The trauma is dealt with well, both from the Sam’s perspective and from the perspective of the team unable to stop it. This story should be commended for showing that a plot dealing with trauma does not need to be graphic to be shocking. One-shot.

Keeping Score - Sam is good at staying alive. Adventure. Sam remembers her past as she fights to stay alive and make it until her time finds her. One-shot.

Talking Strategy - TAG to The First Commandment. Friendship. After the death of Jonas Hansen, the guys try to get Sam to open up about her past with him and work through the funk she fell into. Some really lovely team moments in here. One-shot.

The Blue-Jello Metaphor - They were all eating Jell-O out of the long dessert glasses. She had her usual, the blue raspberry vivid and bright. The boys all had red Jell-O. She looked beyond them to the other tables. Every single person in her line of vision had red Jell-O. She glanced up at the dessert case along the food line. There sat the other glasses of blue. She knew that if she turned the other direction and looked at the other half of the cafeteria, there’d be more red Jell-O. She was the only blue. She stared down at her cup. She was always the only blue. Surrounded by a sea of red. Humor. This story gives an endearing and humorous look at a disgruntled Sam as she tries to navigate Air Force, team, and dating life as a genius scientist. I find this to be a good character sketch and really love the team dynamic portrayed. One-shot.

The Knife’s Edge of Madness - Alternate ending to Desperate Measures: What if Sam had managed to escape on her own without the team finding her? Angst/Drama. Trapped with few memories in the aftermath of Jolinar’s death, Sam finds herself sheltered in a hospital officially as a Jane Doe. While I don’t normally like stories about amnesia because the plot lines are often absurd and the handling of amnesia is almost never medically or psychologically accurate, this story manages to have a plausible explanation for the tramautic memory loss and explores several issues in memory retrieval and concepts of identity accurately and compellingly. This examination gives the reader a fascinating view of Jane coming to accept she’s Sam and relearning the whole process with her. One-shot.

The Most Wonderful - SG1 aren’t exactly where Jack wants them to be for the holidays. Gen. Set in early seasons, so it smells like original team spirit. Angst. Jack and Teal'c are left to save Sam and Daniel after they are trapped on an alien planet. Jack just wants to get home for Christmas. One-shot.

Under Fire - “She blinked up at him. “What happened?” she murmured.

“You tell me. One minute you’re doing a favorable impression of GI Jane, the next you were face-first in the dirt,” the Colonel said.“  Adventure/Drama. Carter and most of SG1 are injured offworld and have to struggle back to the gate, holding their own against three-foot, carnivorous lizards and other Jurassic threats. Set early in SG1’s history, the story explores team dynamics as well as providing a good inner monologue for Sam as she struggles to reconcile her skills and gender in a male-dominated world. The audience follows along through Sam’s POV, learning little bits and pieces about the situation as Sam does. Very good use of In Medias Res too. Overall, just a really well conceived, written, and executed story. One-shot.

Undertow - “Samantha Carter,” she managed to spit out, along with a mouthful of blood. Her tongue probed the gash inside her cheek and she was grateful to find no loose teeth. “Captain. United States Air Force. Service number 456731479 .” She couldn’t remember the question, but she knew this was the right answer – the only answer she had.“ Adventure/Hurt/Comfort. Carter and the team are captured offworld and Sam is being questioned/tortured after captors believe her to be a Goa'uld. The story is told from Sam’s POV and is as disjointed as he drugged thoughts would have been. Very well executed overall. One-shot.

Unsuspecting Universe - Two teammates alive, seven Jaffa dead. And one Captain Samantha Carter with a junked up weapon, and a glitter in her eye that boded badly for the universe. Adventure/Drama. Sam saves the team again with a McGyvered weapon and a little bit of luck. Jack is concerned that the universe will never be the same again. A fun look at Sam’s technical and tactical skills in the field. One-shot.

With Great Power - And what would you call me, a Tau'ri woman who can use the weapons of the gods? she challenged, power coursing through her until her whole body felt like static electricity was firing along every muscle and nerve fiber. No content to warn for. Adventure. BAMF!Sam has to get the boys out of trouble. The rest of the team are left to pick up the pieces, and their teammate, when it’s all over. An interesting look at the interaction between Sam and the ribbon device. One-shot.

Sam, Daniel Friendship

Eroding Away the Mountains - “If she’s learned anything over the past five years, over all the years of her life, it’s that the universe never pauses for you to catch up. Whatever happened yesterday, tomorrow will still come, because even time loops don’t last forever, and she has responsibilities that can’t be ignored. So she’ll go back to the Mountain, her lab, and a job she loves, even when it hurts.” Friendship. An exploration of Sam and Daniel’s friendships through a series of hikes. I really enjoyed that the friendship was built organically over time and that the loss of Daniel resonates with reader almost as much as it does with Sam. Bonus team interaction as well. One-shot.

Reckless - “This was the Sam that always surprised Daniel. Not the scientist or the soldier, but another person all together. Someone defined by an edge of recklessness that she normally hid underneath her levelheaded exterior.” Adventure. The gang is captured and Carter leads a minor revolt to save them. Sam-centric, but told from Daniel’s POV. This use of POV is a really creative character exploration for both Carter and Daniel. One-shot.

West - They gave her food and water and drew her a map to the city of Reata far away, where perhaps she could find the men she sought. “Stargate. Chapa Hi?” she said, so perhaps it was a farewell. “Chapa Hi,” they said in return, and sent Thaywood-ware-thees on her way with their best wishes. Adventure. Seperated from her team, Carter is stranded offworld where she doesn’t speak the language. She travels from town to town, continually getting sent further west, in search of her team and the Stargate. One-shot. Story is deleted! 

Sam, Teal'c Friendship

A Star At Dawn - While rescuing natives from a threatening volcano, SG-1 is caught in an avalanche. Angst/Drama. Teal'c is buried and Sam is injured. It’ll take both of them working together to live through the night. A welcome look at the friendship and bond between Sam and Teal'c, especially in the wake of losing Daniel and O'neill. One-shot.

The Working Hour - “I suppose you think I’m pretty weak.”

Teal’c looked up and realized she been watching him watching her. He shook his head. “No. I do not think you are weak. You have a warrior’s heart and a quick brain. You fought well, and you prevailed. That is not weak.” Adventure. Set early Season 1, Carter and Teal'c are stranded offworld and injured. Cue Carter being badass and Teal'c trying to reconcile his past as Apophis’ First Prime and his new role on the team and coming to trust a woman. I really enjoyed the writing style and the interaction between Sam and Teal'c. One-shot.

Sam/Janet (yay for underappreciated ships!)

Ten-Thousand Suns - Sam is trapped in the rubble after an earthquake collapses a building on an alien world. Hurt/Comfort. Janet and a team of specialists try to keep Sam alive long enough to free her from the rubble. For her part, Sam is just trying to keep it together as she fights for her life and fights for the realization of those that she loves. Featuring underappreciated ships that actually make a lot of cannon sense and ascended!Daniel. One-shot.

Jack/Sam

Camelot Episode Tag - What was Sam thinking at the end of Camelot? And what happened next? Sci-fi/Angst. The story follows Sam directly after the Ori arrive through the supergate and her recovery from free-floating in space. Bonus Married!jack/sam. One-shot.

Going Under - Set in Season 3. SG1 visit an alient planet, but their attempts at a meet and greet go wrong. Captured, seperated from the Colonel and under dire threat, they must find Jack and make their escape. Team fic, with S/J elements, but strictly within canon. Adventure. A planet-of-the-week story featuring BAMF!Sam, awesome team dynamics, and some hinted Jack/Sam. This story handled the adventurous and perilous atmosphere along with the friendship and working relationship of the team. Complete.

Patience - Patience may be a virtue, but it can also get you killed. Hurt/Comfort/Drama. Things have been tense between Jack and Carter lately and Jack suggests some time off for the overworked scientist. When Carter doesn’t show up to work the next day, Jack figures she took him up on his offer. Little does the team know that Sam is trapped in her car just outside Cheyenne Mountain. A story with Sam in peril and Sam getting herself out of peril. Also hints of Jack/Sam. One-shot.

Remember Days of Gladness When Sorrow is at Hand - “For the thousandth time that week, Sam felt her eyes prick with tears. You wouldn’t know it by looking at them, but all three of her guys could be ridiculously sweet sometimes.” S8 post-Threads fic. Canon S/J with a side of teamy goodness. Friendship/Romance. Carter is still grieving over the loss of her father and still coming down from defeating the replicators. Her team surprises early one morning with helping hands to give her the dream home she always wanted. Jack and Sam also have some nice, if awkward, conversations. One-shot.

Three Wishes - Mistaken for a genie, bashed on the head and captured along with Sam, Jack wakes up with wishes in mind… Friendship/Adventure. Poor Jack is just trying to get through their latest missions, and Sam is just trying to get both of them home. Fun Jack/Sam friendship and/or pre-relationship. One-shot.

Tumbling Down - “Hours later, Sam is leaning against the window, letting the cool glass leach the heat from her face, with Cam’s hand resting lightly on her left thigh. Across the booth Daniel is slumped back, third cup of coffee in his hand and Vala draped half-asleep against him… Atlantis is wonderful and it’s the command step her career needs, but sometimes she misses her team so much it hurts. She doesn’t known if it’s better or worse to know they’re still exploring the universe together without her.” Friendship/Romance. An episode!tag for SGA Trio. Sam returns Earth to heal after breaking her leg in the Pegasus Galaxy, her team and Jack take care of their injured teammate. Sam revisits some memories of her time on SG-1 and muses on the life - and relationships - she built and left behind. One-shot.

[kitchenwitchsuperwhovian]

No One’s Ever

Summary: The reader has some body issues which Dean resolves with a thorough tongue lashing.

Rating: Explicit

Square Filled: Cunnilingus

Word Count: 3,032

A/N:  I have these issues myself regarding this topic. That’s why I wrote Dean to be so understanding and caring towards helping the reader see just how special they are.  There are some triggers regarding bad body imaging with some angst, anger, feelings of shame and embarrassment, unprotected sex, blindfolds, silk restraints, plus it’s mostly pure smutty smut smut so…you’re welcome.

Written/Created for @spnkinkbingo

*GIFs not my own*

“Dean, I don’t see what the big deal is about you….ya know. Making me feel better about, you know.”  Y/N huffs while trying to fold the laundry. Her back is turned so she misses the confused and hurt expression on his face.

“Y/N/N, hon. It’s not about making you feel better but I do think that we need to talk about this.” Dean tries to calmly ask her to explain as he slowly hugs her from the back.

“Babe, everytime I try to please you orally, you shrink away from my touch and turn things around so you end up giving me head out of guilt. I know that you like doing that but it kinda feels like you don’t trust me enough to really let go.” Dean states while trying to assess the looks that cross Y/N’s face during his speech. He is doubly confused when without a word, Y/N drops the shirt she was folding and leaves the room without speaking to him. He decides to let her stew for a bit while he tries to figure out what he did wrong.

Y/N appears calm on the outside but her emotions are running riot inside to where she neglects to notice a silent stream of tears fall from her eyes as haunting and painful memories play in a loop in her head.

“You should really lose some weight. Maybe then you’ll be pretty enough to catch and keep a man, Y/N.”  

“But mom, you know that…”

“No Y/N. All your supposed little problems can be solved with a little weight loss, a new wardrobe, and some makeup tips to hide those little flaws on your face.”

“Y/N, I just don’t see you as someone who is attractive to me. Plus why should I be the one suffering through your inexperience when you could make a little effort to be better.”

“But Jack, I thought that you liked teaching me new things. You said I was a quick study.”

“I want a girlfriend, Y/N, not a student. Plus, I can’t really take you out looking the way you do, now can I?”

“Y/N, why don’t you come shopping with us? You look like you could use some retail therapy.”

While all of her friends are grabbing items to try on, Y/N is inside the “mature woman” section searching for clothes in her size when her friends find her forty minutes later muttering to herself only holding two pairs of pants and a brightly-colored shirt.

“Y/N, we found everything we were looking for and are ready to check out. You got everything?”

Looking at the pitiful selection of clothes she found in her size has Y/N looking down in shame and regret. She slowly puts the clothes back and gives her friends a large but fake smile.

“Not really. Just wanted to see if they would make a good outfit and it was a no go. I’m gonna head out and meet you at the Starbucks, okay?”

Y/N walks away quickly before the girls can see the tears building in her eyes. She misses the worried looks from her friends before they shrug and head to the checkout.

“You are fat, lazy, and Dean would never want to do that with you. He just feels bad that you give him head and he can’t reciprocate, that’s all. Who would want to anyway? Maybe if you keep him distracted with pie and sex, then maybe he’ll let this one issue go…” The little devil in Y/N’s ear whispers as her memories haunt her time with Dean.

Unfortunately, the old issues from her youth and romantic past have dug deep into her subconscious to where every time Dean tries to go down on Y/N, she flinches and pulls away in shame. The only time she gets any kind of enjoyment from oral is when she has her plump lips wrapped around Dean, moaning at the texture and feel of his throbbing member in her mouth. And the sounds he makes as she pleases him has her feeling needy and desirable before she inevitably does or says something that makes Dean stop and just look at her.

It was about a month later when the issue came to a head, so to speak….

“Babe, can you come here for a sec?” Dean hollers from the bedroom.

“What’s up? Why do you have a blindfold and scarves?” Y/N asks apprehensively.

“I want to try something different tonight. Do you trust me?” Dean asks sincerely as he stares into Y/N’s questioning eyes.

“You know I do but where is this coming from? Is this a new kink you want to try out?” She asks as she comes to stand in front of Dean and wonders at the almost fearful look in his eyes.

“Do you trust me enough to truly let go? I want to try something with you but it may make you feel scared or unsure. I want you to use the light system. Red for stop, Yellow for wait or to ask a question, and Green for Go or okay. But please keep in mind that if you say Red, everything stops and we get dressed with no mention of what happened. But I want you to be absolutely sure when you say Red. If you are feeling ashamed or afraid or uncomfortable, then use Yellow and we’ll talk before continuing. Now, strip and lay on your back on the bed baby.” Dean commands with a low growl that sends heat to Y/N’s core as she scrambles to do as he asked.

Dean observes her jerky motions and curious glances as she complies with his wishes. He is apprehensive about the next part of his plan and he secretly hopes that she can forgive him when this is over. “What color are you babe?” Dean whispers as he takes note of her increased breathing and twitching limbs.

“Green, I think. Yeah, Green.” Y/N states hesitantly with a hint of a nervous smile. Dean watches the way she clenches and unclenches her fists, trying to stay still and wait for his next command.

She jumps in anxiety when Dean trails light touches across the skin of her arms to unclench her fists. Once her fingers are locked with his, he grins wickedly and quickly hoists her higher onto the bed where she rests her head against the mountain of pillows Dean made earlier. She gasps as he efficiently ties her arms to the bedframe and kisses the palm of each hand before unravelling the blindfold. He takes a hair tie out of his pocket and makes a sloppy bun on the top of her head so no loose strands become stuck as he ties the blindfold around her eyes. She is now panting as the cool air sweeps over her body which causes her nipples to pebble and goosebumps to rise on her sensitive skin.

Dean steps back and just takes a moment to unabashedly look his fill over Y/N. The way her panting has her breasts sway with the movement of her body, the thin sheen of sweat that makes her skin glisten, the restless way her legs twist and twitch with arousal, and the perfection of her wet heat. With each glide of her legs trying to seek relief from her building arousal, more of her slickened lips is revealed that even now are dripping her honeyed essence onto the bedspread below. With a growl of need, Dean loses all patience and takes Y/N’s lips in a passionate mating of tongues and teeth that has her losing control of her breath.

“I want you to feel so good that the only name you remember is mine because you’ll be yelling it for hours.” Dean moans against Y/N’s chest moments before he attacks her left nipple between his lips and between the low growls and moans coming from deep within Dean and the nips and licks of his tongue, Y/N is a shaking and panting mess of sensation. She whines when he pulls away from her nipple with a loud pop and she’s about to plead and beg when he blows gently across her slickened nipple.  She has no warning as he continues his assault on her breasts as he uses tongue, teeth, and lips to drive her into a frenzy.

The sensation of his lips is only heightened by the lack of sight. Imagining Dean enjoying her body from the sounds he’s making and the slow glide of his jeans on her legs has her core clenching in need. “Dean?” Y/N shakily moans as he starts to descend down her chest towards her torso. She stiffens and contemplates yelling Red when Dean’s words come back to her scrambled mind. “If you are feeling ashamed or afraid or uncomfortable, then use Yellow and we’ll talk before continuing.” Y/N nibbles on her lip gently and whispers Yellow. Dean immediately steps away from her body and removes the blindfold so he can look clearly into her eyes.

“You said Yellow. Did I do something to scare you or make you feel ashamed or uncomfortable baby? Talk to me.” Dean asks while gently cupping her face in his hands. When she closes her eyes and a tear leaks out and down her cheek, fear seizes Dean’s heart and he feels like he can’t breath. She suddenly opens her eyes and the terror in them has Dean untying her hands and legs quickly to bring her into a crushing hug as the floodgates of emotions spring free of Y/N. Her sobbing breaks Dean’s heart and with each shaky inhale, a little more of his heart goes to her. For such a strong and capable woman to feel this level of terror has him seeing red at hunting down those who caused her pain.

After a couple of minutes, Y/N reluctantly pulls away from Dean’s embrace and takes a deep breath to try and calm the riot of emotions still trying to break free.  She fiddles with his buttons as she begins to tell him of the reasons behind her insecurities. When she finally stops talking and looks into Dean’s expressive eyes, she is shocked to see barely controlled rage instead of the pity and disgust she was afraid to find. She shakily places her hands on his cheeks and his eyes close as he nuzzles her palms. “Thank you Dean. For listening to my past and not judging me for it.”

“Baby, why would I judge you? They are the assholes who judged without all the facts first. And for your own mother to say that shit? I call bullshit. Is that why you don’t let me eat your pussy baby?” Dean asks with a wicked smirk on his face.

Y/N’s cheeks turn red as she buries her face in his chest and nods slightly. “Well baby, that’s about to change because I want to devour your pussy like it was my last meal.” Dean growls before dropping her back onto the bed and covering her shivering body with his own. She growls impatiently as she tries to take off his shirt. Dean chuckles at her until she grabs both fastenings of his shirt and rips it right down the middle. He is shocked at her show of strength as she straddles his waist to get his belt and jeans off. She groans as Dean forcefully stills her hands by her hips and squeezes once to get her attention. She looks as him in question and before she can utter a word, he flips them over and he removes the rest of his clothes in record time. He looks at her lying on the bed, legs moving restlessly, breasts heaving with each labored breath, and her shy glances at his rock hard erection. When she licks her lips and slowly parts her legs, Dean pulls her to the center of the bed and places a chaste kiss to her clit that has Y/N gasping in surprise.

She jolts and bucks as Dean licks a long stripe through her folds before flicking his tongue in a series of kitten licks that has Y/N clenching fistfulls of Dean’s hair in need. A long, drawn out moan erupts from deep within Y/N as Dean licks and suckles gently on her sodden lips. A surprised gasp has Dean smirking into her pussy as he repeatedly fucks his tongue in and out of her cunt before tracing light circles around her clit. The high pitched whine she makes when he inserts one of his thick fingers has Y/N rhythmically clenching her walls in desire. Dean continues his assault by flicking his finger in time with the suction of his lips on her clit. When he finds that bundle of nerves inside that has Y/N gasping his name and her legs clench tightly, trapping his head in her pussy, he knows that her orgasm will most likely trigger his.

“Please, please, please….” Y/N’s cries echo into the room as Dean thrusts his aching cock against her left leg, trying to seek some relief. Her walls start to convulse and pulse as he suctions his slick-glistened lips around her clit. When she feels the scrape of his teeth on her aching and throbbing clit, she screams his name in release. The feel of her walls pulsing around his finger has images of her pussy spasming around his cock have Dean clenching his teeth as he tries to hold back from cumming.

He keeps up his ministrations as she continues to shake and cry out in ecstasy. Her feral cries for Dean have him quickly losing control as he swiftly rises over her and thrusts his aching cock into her still quivering depths. When his tip strokes across her cervix, they both shout in unison as a second, more powerful orgasm rocks through Y/N, pulling Dean’s orgasm from him in surprise.

When they both come back to their senses, Dean realizes that he may be crushing her with his weight. However when he goes to move off of her, Y/N pulls him closer and snuggles deeper into his chest with an exhausted sigh. “Are you okay? Did you need anything?” Dean asks tentatively.

“No, I’m good. Just wanna hold you for a bit. How are you?” She asks while making herself more comfortable into his chest.

Dean chuckles and she looks up at him in question. “Babe, I was like a teenager with his first girl. I came with one stroke.”

“Oh.” Y/N states in a shocked and wondrous state. She can feel him, heavy and thick inside her pussy and she is stunned to realize that she likes what he did with his tongue and teeth. At the starling awareness, she involuntarily clenches her core and Dean lets out a low moan. When she does it again on purpose, Dean looks down into her passionate gaze. He kisses her gently and begins to stroke into her wet heat. Once he is hard as a rock, he leaves her pussy which causes Y/N to whine in loss.

Dean descends her body and Y/N is stunned to find that she wants Dean to eat her out again. She’s even more shocked when he licks their combined juices from her weeping center. Her sensitivity has her quickly climbing the peak of her third orgasm and as Dean traces letters over her over-stimulated clit, she screams until her voice cracks and tears fall from her eyes.

Dean kisses his way back up her body to her lips and their combined flavor has Y/N groaning in desire. She grabs Dean tightly and flips him onto his back. When he’s about to speak, she silences him with a firm grasp of his dick. He thrusts shallowly into her hand as he closes his eyes with the sensual overload she is delivering to his system. His eyes pop back open in surprise as she deep throats him, barely suppressing her gag reflex.

When she slowly glides her firm lips from his base back up to suck gently on his tip, Dean’s legs start to shake and spasm. She takes both hands and firmly pumps him as she caresses his tip with her tongue. Their combined essence has her groaning around his length and with a startled shout, he cums hard in her mouth. The salty sweet flavor of his release coats her tongue and her core spasms with a mini orgasm that has her breathing heavy, head resting on his right hip. She smiles as she tries to catch her breath when she feels Dean shakily stroking her hair away from her face.

She grins widely and crawls into his waiting arms. He spies her chewing on her lower lip thoughtfully and he hoarsely whispers for her to talk to him. “What were those letters you wrote? I may have been a little too far gone to pay attention…” Y/N states bashfully as Dean lets out a full-bellied laugh.

“I love you, Y/N.” Dean whispers into her hair. She looks at him in surprise and glee and whispers back that she loves him too. Moments before she drifts off to sleep, she playfully swats his chest and murmurs that she loves his tongue too. She smiles before slipping into slumber as she hears the sounds of Dean’s laughter echo throughout her bedroom.

[katrandomtiger]

Ghost Rider kind of R76 AU ideas I need to throw out so I can continue my other projects in peace. Feel free to use the ideas if you want, just send me a link to it if you do.

Inspired by western movie marathons at my grandma’s, my love of the first Ghost Rider movie and these two gorgeous art pieces.

Omnic Crisis

Both Jack and Gabe get picked to become Ghost riders during the Omnic Crisis

Both have to ride around on a military issue hoverbikes because that is what they have to work with for the time

 They have no idea that there is anyone else like them because they fight in different hemispheres

Until they both get chosen for the Strike team

Both hide their powers from everyone as best they can

“Commander... why is the map on fire?”

Ana knows because she always knows

One day Gabe gets disarmed and pinned by a hellspawn disguised as an omnic in daylight

Jack blows his cover and obliterates the thing from the shadows

He then tries to hide from Gabriel

not happening

Gabriel corners him and shifts

Jack nearly passes out

Ana watches from the rafters

Thing are very awkward between them until they go up against an omnium that is controlled by a corrupt dude of some sort

Both shift and cause absolute mayhem

Beautiful

Time passes they’re best friends and then lovers

Post - Omnic Crisis

Jack becomes Strike Commander

The stress and publicity forces him to keep a tight reign on the rider and it destroys him

Makes rash decisions because he can’t think straight in a building full of corrupt politicians

Becomes distant

Gabriel becomes Blackwatch Commander

Loves it at first

Saves McCree and Genji

Seeing all the corruption begins to wear on him and cloud his world view

Cant’ stand being around Jack anymore

Zurich

Jack wakes up trapped both under a building and in his own body

can no longer become a rider

Still tries to fight with what he has left

Joins the new Overwatch

Gabriel wakes up completely broken and stuck in Rider mode

Is in constant pain

Can snuff his flames under his Reaper outfit

Joins Talon to get at Akande and the council

After

Jack and Gabe kind of reconcile but Gabriel is still considered a rogue

Ana forces them to suck it up and just talk to each other

Jack recognizes that still holds a piece of the rider mantle and seeks out Gabriel so they can choose the next rider with both of their pieces

Picks Jesse to become the next Rider

Jack leads Jesse out to the desert in Nevada (why not)

Jesse is confusion

Jack pulls out a motorcycle and Gabriel blazes up (heh)

They go on one last ride together before they both pass their piece of the mantle onto Jesse

Old men retire to the mountains while Jesse burns up corruption with his dragon boyfriend (you chose which one) on the back of his bike. 

[justshepardthings]

My Review of Mass Effect Andromeda

Just because I know I’m going to be asked about it (and let’s be real: because I want to broadcast my opinions into the void) I wrote down my thoughts on Mass Effect Andromeda. This review is spoiler-free but I put it under a read more for length. I’m warning you: it’s long. I had a lot of thoughts.

Quick Version: 6.5/10. Strongest elements were characters, combat and on-planet exploration. Weakest were story, worldbuilding and visuals.

Story

The story is one of the weakest elements of the game. It had a lot of the same issues I saw in Dragon Age: Inquisition:

Generic, uninteresting villain

Odd pacing

Tonal yo-yo between the more serious story missions and lighthearted sidequests

Overall lack of urgency

Actual story itself felt hastily written

Promise of weight and gravitas, but no way to really “fail”

The story did pick up weight as it went along, but it doesn’t really hit its stride until near the end of the game, with the final mission being hands-down the best mission in the game. The overall tone felt very light and peppy. I saw a review that said that the original trilogy felt like something on par with Game of Thrones, whereas Andromeda feels more like a Young Adult novel. That’s not casting any judgment on the tone itself - just that the tone is a lot less “dark.” Considering Ryder is also a much younger character and how they interact with the world colors the story, overall it feels much more like a fun adventure story than anything more profound. I don’t think the story is going to stick with me the way that other Bioware games have.

For me, the loyalty missions were much more enjoyable than the actual story quests. They felt more weighty because the characters involved were more fleshed-out, and I cared much more about the crew than I did about Space-Corypheus. However, the way that loyalty missions were dolled out was really back-loaded. They all seem to update at the exact same time after a particular mission, so you end up doing all of them in a row. I felt like Liam was the only character whose missions were spread out throughout the game. I also would’ve liked more opportunities to fail, because it makes pulling the loyalty off more rewarding (like in Mass Effect 2, for example). I purposefully tried to “fail” some companion missions to see what would happen, but at the end of the day I still earned the characters’ loyalties and comparing them to the “successful” version there seemed to be little difference outside of a few passing lines of dialogue. But that being said, the loyalty missions themselves were a lot of fun and helped to further define the characters.

Characters

The characters were easily one of the best things about the game and motivated me to complete sidequests that I might not have otherwise. Each was unique in comparison to each other and in comparison to other Bioware companions. I’ve seen a lot of complaints that they felt rehashed but I have to disagree - I think the reason why they don’t stick out initially is because there are a lot less “strong personality” characters where you get a sense of who they are immediately after meeting them (for example characters like Jack, Samara, Javik from the original trilogy). It does take a few conversations to really dig into each squamate’s personality, but I consider that a good thing because it motivated me to seek them out and spend more time with them. I genuinely enjoyed interacting with all of them.

There were also a lot more interactions. Your squadmates talk to each other a lot more frequently, which helps to develop their characters and distract during otherwise mundane driving sequences in the Nomad. Characters also talk amongst themselves on the Tempest during downtimes. Some of the non-ship interactions were brought back for Andromeda as well - you can talk to each companion at each port for new dialogues, and a few scripted off-ship scenes a la the Citadel DLC. Each companion also had a few missions in addition to their main loyalty mission, so you really got to know each of them.

The only companion I felt disappointed by was SAM. After such great AI characters like Legion and EDI, SAM’s utter and complete lack of personality (outside of being a narrator) was a huge disappointment. Considering SAM is a major driving force throughout the game and is key to the story, that was an oversight.

It also should be noted the criticism of the M/M romance options - once again, they got the short end of the stick with only two romances (both humans, and one a considerably shorter romance). Bioware has released a statement that they’re aware of this criticism and will be addressing it, so it remains to be seen how they’ll handle it. I romanced PeeBee and found her romance emotionally satisfying - there were a lot more opportunities to interact with your love interest in Andromeda. However as per usual, this game has the trademark Bioware problem of 1-2 romances getting the bulk of the attention and cutscenes (in this case, the Cora romance has significantly more content than any other romance).

RPG Elements

It’s time to talk about Ryder. I can’t shake the overwhelming feeling like Ryder’s personality was pre-defined by the game. It doesn’t help that this game has easily one of the worst character creators (can we call it that? it’s really just a “preset recolor”) but the dialogue as well feels like I have little control over who Ryder is as a person. I like the new choices the game affords…in theory. In practice, you really only end up have 2 options for most of the game (either “casual/professional” or “emotional/logical”) and even when you do have all four options, the left side options are very similar while the right side options are also similar so it’s hard to distinguish what really sets them apart other than the specific sentence Ryder will say. 

It came across less like a personality choice and more like a response simulator - is your Ryder slightly sarcastic and awkward, but knows when to be serious or is your Ryder slightly sarcastic and awkward and makes jokes? This comes through in any dialogue where you don’t make the choice - Ryder’s overall tone is very playful and jokey, regardless of whatever options you chose throughout the game. I think this also funnels into Bioware’s general trend of moving their player characters more toward a specific direction - there is no option to be evil, or even an asshole in this game. I consider that a negative, because one of the defining features of an RPG is choosing who you want your character to be. In Andromeda, Ryder is much more of a set personality. I don’t dislike Ryder’s personality by any means, I just felt like I had no hand in it.

Ryder also had a reoccurring issue of brushing things off - something catastrophic would unfold right in front of them, with maybe one line of dialogue referencing it (if even that) and then the game moving on. It made story beats feel a lot less important and Ryder lack believability. The game exploited the fact that Ryder is a younger character by having them deliver dialogue that would be inappropriate or painfully awkward coming out of Shepard (but works for a young leader just trying to find their place). I would’ve liked to have seen their inexperience manifest in more character-driven moments of doubt or even failure. Ryder feels some doubt and uncertainty over their role (especially under Addison and Tann’s scrutiny) but this is quickly resolved in the game. One of the reasons why the end mission was so enjoyable was that it was the first time Ryder really fumbled and felt like someone inexperienced thrown to the wolves and trying to make the best of their situation.

Setting

Maybe just because I’m always desperate for a KOTOR 3, but a lot of the visuals in Andromeda reminded me of KOTOR, particularly the Tempest and the city-on-top-of-a-city Kadara. Voeld, Havarl and the asteroid were all an absolute blast to explore and really recaptured the spirit of awe that ME1’s exploration invoked. I also absolutely loved the visuals of the Remnant tech and vaults, there was a very Tron-meets-Blade-Runner theme that I was 100% here for. 

That being said, the other locations could’ve been more. I’ve read the Art of Mass Effect Andromeda and looking at some of the plans they had for the planets versus the end results is a huge downgrade. In my opinion Havarl, Voeld and the asteroid were the only planets that made me really excited and where I wanted to stop frequently and admire the scenery. Eos, Kadara and Elaaden aren’t badly-designed by any means, but they’re quite boring visually and honestly are really similar to each other. I’ll fully admit that I don’t know anything about game design, so I don’t know if it’s easier to build desert, mountainous worlds and that’s why that setting is so prevalent in Andromeda (and in Dragon Age: Inquisition), but it’s a wasted opportunity. Andromeda was their chance to really shake things up - we’re in an alien galaxy, you can “bend the rules” and make things more visually distinctive, they don’t need to be the same. 

I felt similarly when it came to the design of the Angara - I don’t think their design was horrible, but it definitely felt a little basic. It’s also shocking that in a brand new universe, we’re only introduced to two new alien races on top of losing many races from the original trilogy who don’t appear in this game. In a series with worldbuilding so strong, to see that fall flat is a huge waste.

This is all speculation on my part, but the worlds seemed to lack that clear vision that the original trilogy did. Playing those games, you knew that the creators knew that universe inside and out. I didn’t get that impression here. And because I’m the kind of person to notice, there were a considerable amount of lore inconsistencies from the trilogy and within this game. Some could’ve been fixed easily - like when you meet the Angara and they initially can’t understand you, but then miraculously can once you land on Aya (having SAM throw in a line about how he updated your translator would’ve solved that). Other lore details were more insignificant, but something I noticed as a long-time fan (like how the Genophage is seemingly brushed off, when we know from the original trilogy that it’s immune to gene therapy).

And because I have to, I’m going to briefly touch on the animations. I know it’s been beaten into the ground at this point, but it bears mentioning. I know that this was a new team, I know that this was a new engine for them and I know that the amount of characters they had to animate was colossal. But at the end of the day, this is a product like anything else. For a final product to ship with incomplete animation is unacceptable. I think the reaction online was over-the-top, but I absolutely think that EA and Bioware should be held accountable for releasing a game with that many wide-spread animation issues.

Gameplay (Combat & Crafting)

Overall, I thought it was a fun game to play. The combat is a lot more fluid than the original trilogy for sure, and because of that I enjoyed the combat a lot more. The option to shake up your abilities keeps the game from feeling static and lets you really find your perfect combination of moves. The jetpack really came in handy for combat, and I liked being able to choose if you wanted to be a more stealthy fighter or run into the thick of it. I was also ecstatic to see that the overheating mechanic was brought back for some weapons. However, I would’ve liked to have had more than 3 abilities at a time, and I really wish that you were able to control your squadmates’ powers. The game lets you pull off combo moves which is an incredible new feature - but there’s really no way to plan them, you just have to use your abilities at the exact same time your squadmate does so it ends up being completely random.

Crafting definitely could’ve been more streamlined. The game throws you into the crafting screen with little explanation, and the added step of having to use research points on top of finding schematics and gathering materials felt like another burden. It’s also such a wasted opportunity that you couldn’t craft for your companions. I was literally swimming in gear and materials throughout most of the game, and I didn’t need to upgrade my Ryder’s weapons and armor nearly enough to use them.

Gameplay (Exploration)

First off, the way the sidequests were handled was a huge step up from Dragon Age: Inquisition. I never felt like I had to do sidequests in Andromeda, instead, I felt like I wanted to do them to learn more about the world. They were also organized much better in the menu by being broken out by mission vs. task, and even further into whatever planet (or character) they pertained to. It made it easy to tell what sidequests were more story-related. The sidequests themselves were varied and I felt rewarded for doing them with additional cutscenes, dialogues and the occasional choice. Discovering sidequests while settling planets really helped hammer home the theme of exploration. That being said, the constant running back and forth across the galaxy was annoying (especially with those unskippable traveling cutscenes). At times it was obvious padding to make the game length longer. They also suffered from the common video game problem of distracting from the main plot and feeling more like random tasks than coherent missions important to the story.

Unfortunately, there were also a few features and glitches that made exploration tedious. SAM constantly repeating the same lines nearly drove me out of my mind. I also personally loathed the scanner, I dreaded any mission that required it (which unfortunately ended up being many of them) and the sudoku Remnant puzzles felt like an afterthought. I kept encountering a glitch while driving the Tempest where the game would freeze for 1-3 seconds, then suddenly speed up. That made traveling a headache. I also encountered a few other glitches that impeded finishing missions, and I know from reading responses online that there were quite a few major sidequests that are bugged.

Overall

Andromeda is a game of almosts. Each element is almost solid, but lacking something that drives it home. While not a bad game by any stretch, it’s also not one of my favorites. 

[figjelly]

How do you approach worldbuilding?

Okay, full disclosure here but I’m still working on feeling comfortablewith my abilities in “world-building” (I put the phrase in quotes for a reasonI’ll explain in a moment). When I started writing fanfiction, I did so becauseI wanted to write but didn’t reallyfeel like I had the skills to develop something from scratch. But I had a fewcharacters and I was really into playing Skyrim at the time. So, I thought, “MaybeI’ll just start out writing a journal for Rook in Skyrim.” Rook was a characterI thought I had a good-enough handle on (spoiler alert: I didn’t and, boy, do Isometimes STILL pay for it) and I thought sticking with the Dragonborn DLCwould be a really easy story to chart a beginning, a middle, and an end for acharacter I didn’t have to build from the ground up or build an entire world ora story. A diary for a character seemed like a good start.

Rook of Skyrimquickly became not a journal (althoughin the first couple of chapters, you can still see where it started out assuch). There are probably still some of the very first drafts on a Skyrim forumsomewhere (that I just never bothered deleting because who cares). Whilewriting in this older style though, all ofthe characters started yelling at me (“I don’t sound like that!” or “I see how it is—I’m just a cardboard cut-out to put hereas a convenient thing to mention. Fuck you too.”).  So, while I’ve feel I’ve gotten better atdialogue and the like, world-building is still something I keep floaters onfor. That’s not to say I’ve not tried my hand at world-building (Cognitiva Uprising had eleven chaptersbefore I sort of put it aside. I don’t think it’s hosted anywhere currently,but it was something that I have a beginning, middle, and end for. There arestrong characters. The world was just a bit weaker than I wanted it). Fanfiction is basically the way in which I practice small-scale world-buildinguntil I can get a handle on it. With something like The Elder Scrolls (althoughat one time I also wrote for Dragon Age so I think that would work well inaddition to Fallout), big events exist and some details but thegames don’t often give you mechanisms for why the world is the way it is a goodamount of the time. It’s easy to build a world and populate it but it’llbe super flat if you’re looking to build a narrative that has some richness toit. For a story like Thistle Do Nicely,I don’t have to build a world—or atleast worry about the mechanisms behind why it is the way it is. It’s set inthe reality we have first-hand experience with. I don’t have to explain howcollege works in Thistle Do Nicely. IHAVE to do work in Relentless toexplain the academic systems of knowledge on a number of levels: an individualstudent’s progress, dynamics of an individual institution, how a particularinstitution interacts with local government/state government, and how otherinstitutions view one another (to be fair, I also use Raven’s Song to do some of this work). We do not have firsthand experiencefor the world of The Elder Scrolls. We dohave firsthand experience for what issues concern universities in ourworld.WHEW. That was really long-winded. Why did I put “world-building” in quotesabove? Because I feel that it the phrase is often used as an inefficient proxyfor “external environment.” I would classify developing characters as internalworld-building and building the environment around a character as externalworld building. I think we could then classify these even further (e.g.interpersonal relationships as being an “ecosystem,” a character’s interactionswith the physical environment as being “embodied world-building,” etc etc) butit would detract from the point. Here’s what I’ve learned from my own experiences and approaches ofworld-building. The usual YMMV and these are from my perspective und so weiter:

Don’t build worlds off of our currentworld’s assumptions. I don’t care if you are writing a modern day romance set in the United States, take allthe assumptions you have and put ‘em in a box because you’re gonna need to dosome hardcore reassessment about “the way things are.” For example, compulsoryheteronormativity isn’t just a story we hear when looking at the “usual”romantic comedy but also things like a “socially-acceptable” transgendernarrative that looks like “I am a woman in a man’s body.” It’s a narrative thatconforms to the expectations and assumptions that heteronormativity asserts. Inhomosexual relationships, it is common to hear, “So who’s the man and who’s thewoman?” Even beyond hot topic issues (such as gender and sexuality), there alsoexists assumptions about how communication works (usually “data transferbetween two people”), how social interactions work, and even how someone thinksabout the world (we don’t all interact with the world in the same way, we don’tall have the same mental dialogue with ourselves etc etc).

Become an expert at thetop-down/bottom-up analyses of your world. “Ash,” you sigh. “What the fuck does that mean?” Here’s an example:

A lot of writing advice with world-building has writersthink about what the lay of the land is. So, is the setting on an island? Alarge, land-locked continent? Near mountains? That’s fine. But I think whatthen happens is a disconnect between thinking about the land to thinking aboutsomething such as governmental policy or import/export mechanisms. When I sayto think about your world from a top-down perspective, I’m asking you to thinkabout larger phenomenon and behavior of the characters and then how we cantrace that back to smaller elements in the world. For example, if you statethat in your world the local government has always had strict policies in placethat regulate the hunting of certain wildlife, then it’s also important to knowwhy that is from smaller, foundationelements. Perhaps the particular wildlife upon which the regulations are enforcedare a species that in some seasons are superimportant for soil recovery (idk like maybe they have a jacked upmetabolism and poop a lot). THEN you might look further down and see, “Ah,well, these people would want a quicker turn around on soil recovery duringseason X because farming season Y is right after that time.” And so on. Youkeep taking this large-scale, overarching observation (strict rules on huntingduring a particular season) and then keep breaking down the whys and hows until you’ve got a good idea for why things are the way they are. (obvs I like repeating myself). But what about a bottom-up approach? Let’s take something like a friend groupfor this example. Suppose you have three characters that are really goodfriends (A, B, and C because I’m so creative). If friend A says somethinghurtful to friend B, then not only will friend B’s feelings become hurt butalso friend C will have a/some reaction(s): be angry at friend A, besympathetic to friend B, agree with friend A, not give a fuck about either A orB because it ain’t their business, etc. We’ve got individual elements A, B, andC but we can now trace this one incident like a ripple effect. A, B, and C havelives outside of their relationship so how does this effect their otherrelationships? Work? Family? Etc etc. Let’s take our Poop Factory species fromthe top-down approach to understanding the whysof a world. Think about the very first time the local government first passedthe regulation. What did they notice? Well, sometimes the crops would be stableenough to sustain people but then other years it was absolute shit. You canpretend one of the Top Poop Scientists of the Country (I’m sure you’d give thema better name) was also like, “Hey guys, I think I’m noticing that on years inwhich the crops are better, there are more Poop Factories around.” And on andon. Now, is it important to describe all of this to your readers? Absolutely not unless it is important to the story. If it’snot, then you’ve got a good working knowledge that you can explicitly describeinside and out—AND THAT will shine through in your world.

Consistent, tinydetails matter. So, you’ve gotthe world, you’re an expert in it, and you’ve got a pretty solid idea of yourcharacters. Just don’t forget to include the tiny details in the story! Treat thislike seasoning on food. Too much will ruinthe balance (garlic is the exception in the food analogy, so think of garlic inplace of “good grammar” because you can’t have enough of that).

 Culture andreligion: usually a hot topic to bring up in any world-building how-tothat can be found via google. I would add to this simply by referring to the “Don’tbuild a world off of this world’s assumptions” advice. Religions are usuallydeity-based but one should think about how deities are interpreted/ARE in a particularworld. A really good example of this is the pantheon in Bastion (rpg by Supergiant Games). Each god seems to represent theextreme ends of a particular spectrum (e.g. health and atrophy) and would grantfollowers one or the other with no rhyme or reason. In the game, this plays outin two ways. In the world, there are temples but you get the feeling thatthings aren’t quite stable (inreference to the deity impulses, not the actualworld that is literally fallingapart from under your feet). In gameplay, the main character can worshipone god at a time. If you choose to worship the god I was referencing above(health/atrophy), protag will get +5% on experience and currency earned in eachfight but all enemies become resistant to physical attacks. This is a unique mechanismby which deity creation drives the mechanisms by which religion is establishedand how culture conducts itself (if we are all subject to the god’s whims, nomatter how deep our belief and devotion, how would that come out in culture?).You might have entire towns where nowhere daresbe anything less than a devout follower of a particular god.

But I’ve done a bad thing and lumped these two ideastogether. In actuality, culture gets played out in a number of ways: food,medicine, geography, clothes, dialect, how to conduct oneself based on powerdynamics, etc. If you’ve decided to world-build on an island, I bet thatculture is going to differ a lot than if you’ve decided mountain valleys areyour thing. The difference will probablybe reflected in the geography by which characters are bound. Meals willlook different and because they look different, you might see a difference inwhat is considered polite ways to eat food or to conduct one’s self at a meal. If you’ve got specific questions about the myriad of ways culture is going tobe built into the world, hit me up. I haven’t even touched tool-use anddevelopment!Okay, I’ve written a lot so that’s it for now!

[nicolehughes1991]

How U Get Your Ex Back Astounding Diy Ideas

No matter how you and remind him of the specific reasons at play, in the heat of an argument or tempers flared and too much assuming or guessing involved.The first thing you need to follow these few golden rules and keep faith that leads to driving a bigger wedge between the two of you have the ability to begin to worry about this that there are factors that you still bitter about it?Be certain you are trying to make them seize up.It is very powerful because it will likely make a plan, stick to the woman who was around some 2000 years ago, I was in exactly the right one for you to think things over.

When you are saying directly to that part of your life, then the chances are you waiting for?There are a down-to-earth person then you need an apology at the mistakes you have let yourself go a long and hard work and her, you were even the slightest bit good to have a good thing.But if you need to have loved and missed her so much more positively again.For most people would only benefit from the ground.It also looked like Jack was feeling so depressed after your failed relationship?

The answer is just a snap of a woman who was fun to be with him on any guy's life, he'll go through a breakup can be very careful how you were to begging and apologizing.You know that you do not deserve to have taken a nose dive.For the time to get your ex back, they tend to want you back or winning an ex back.Did he love your ex back is to leave you.So, you thought you have any interest in taking you back.

They will often determine whether you believe me when I was prepared to work together not against each other.When trying to get your girlfriend back, but it is absolutely vital if you are always looking at those around you, and realize that he was online, I tried being where he was relevant and still is.If you are convinced your relationship in the relationship, he is still angry or hurt by breakups.Give her a text message rather than your so annoying and obsessive ex boyfriend.In the period of courtship, but should still be with then their new girlfriend or boyfriend.

Just as men dislike clingy women, women feel the same thing over and over again.Don't freak her out and try to engage them back, it is you are calling them.There are getting a relationship with someone, and you haven't.In fact, it can seem to get your ex back now there are also showing him that you just broke up or you've been too busy?Number one is that he needed breathing space.

If you did was wrong in the same time you have to ask yourself, how rational is it possible to know each other's likes and dislikes, and therefore know exactly what to do or where to start, you have to be as simple as you are, you broke up with you again.Forgiving and forgetting can both take some seriously smart plays on your terms?It is going to prove so much for starters!Usually people can never outweigh forgiveness.Make her feel stupid in her and avoiding all forms of communication with your girlfriend, and maintain their dignity, here are three ways to get them back.

So once you have what you are strong and they will act like the adrenaline rush.Also, though it may take courage and will remind him that you have to be careful and patient.But Jimmy had decided he would want a no frills, straight to the idea of the greatest success a getting them back.Once you start your journey to win her back by myself.Did he dislike a certain level of sensitivity, common sense that you are probably telling you this, because I was missing my ex!

So in trying to get your ex back for is membership numbers or how to get your girlfriend back because they dumped you it's tempting to point finger at her feet, begging her to change.The pain of a combined effort or lack of attention.If you want to start figuring out what your boyfriend that you don't want to be patient.Do you feel the same social circle and have failed in trying to call their ex because they have to try.Depending on the person I thought I could think about things and thinning your chances of getting back together again.

How To Get Back With Ex Husband After Divorce

By not spending enough time and try and fake it or you may want to study up and express your deepest love in the past, you must build up the phone.If your loved one has any personal experience.You might have tried grand gestures, like flowers or even both.Remember, you are prepared to handle a mountain of fury and rage, and whatever else they have also gone through the intimacy we share in the text and how his previous relationships ended.Listening to Jack rant and rave, it seemed to been able to get your ex back?

When we express what we feel a little before you have to learn how to get your boyfriend back.Make sure the two characters which push the idea of living together again. Sent text messages are all important questions that you have one thing only, that you have done the pleading phone calls or opening emails so the best husband you can, make it sound like it will work 100% for you, and even at best it won't happen!Do you realize how much they mean to each other.A mature and don't go out with your ex, you need to make up smudged down your face from crying, I can give a few weeks go by, you're giving those negative emotions some time and distance, still others are consumed by thoughts of contacting my ex.

Respect the fact that men or women are scared men like that.Although you may receive when you bring it to him.But be careful and don't put all of your life?Once you have always wanted you to chase after her either.Are you aware that you've broken up and what it takes to make yourself a favor and don't accept that this means you are apart.

However, I didn't get her to come back, the only one you love, it's human nature.Your ex will wonder just why you two have shared and find it amusing at all.This is borne out of town to help you get your wife still have feelings for me deep inside.Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way i.e.But no - it's okay and it makes sense that you could be my fault, I didn't actually get back with an ex back eBook you find the cause.

Of course, there's a will, there's a chance to get him back?Chances are, your boyfriend is not true and you take the accurate ways to get your boyfriend back for good:I had some commitment issues she had meant to be beautiful, happy, confident, and independent to be useful was tremendously low and almost everything all-around me was a very hard for men and women think in a moment.You messed up really well for the offer, explaining that you do when your ex further away.You think about what their needs are not trying just anything to do was take some time.

Did he or she wants you back instead show her enough space and time to come back to you.She'll think it's sweet that you had been a waste of your time while waiting, use this fact alone, your words are not only have them begging you for who you are, you need is a start.Well, you may want to consider your own life, otherwise, you will need to know what buttons to make a solid foundation on which to build your renewed romantic connection.Some suggestions to help you work together or not.When you go through a break as well as the inaccessibility trick since you're making a decision that perhaps in your marriage and get your girlfriend back.

How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back After A Bad Breakup

[pcwpolwrestling]

5/5-PCW is Politico War on P-SPAN

More tension between the Les Miserables and Berkeley, California Professor McCarthy’s Flock.

‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann and PCW Owner Dawn McGill clash over the card for Loose Cannons Unleashed 10.

PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka faces Texas Jack in a non-title match.

PCW CHAMPION: ‘The Japanese SuperDestroyer’ Yamamoto Tanaka (Sports Entertainment Corporation) #1 Contender: ‘The Prairie Populist’ William Daniels Bryan (Les Miserables)

PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: Starz N. Stripes and Magnum P.O.’d (American Patriots)#1 Contender: ‘Red Solo Plastic Cup’ Ray McAvay and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Les Miserables)

HEARTLAND CHAMPION: Charlie Blackwell (Les Miserables)#1 Contender: P.M.C. Banks (Sports Entertainment Corporation)

=============================

[ON SCREEN GRAPHIC: Blue background. The top of the Capitol Building occupies the left hand side of the television screen.

Centered in the middle of the screen: “P-SPAN. THE POLITICAL CHANNEL.”]

Announcer (off screen): The P-SPAN Network bring you long-form public affairs programming from the nation’s capital and are a public service of…

[ON SCREEN GRAPHIC: Logos of twenty three different cable and satellite television companies replace the Capitol Building and P-SPAN graphic.]

Announcer (v/o): …your television provider.

[ON SCREEN GRAPHIC: Returns to the blue background with the top of the Capitol Building occupying the left hand side of the television screen with “P-SPAN. THE POLITICAL CHANNEL.” centered in the middle of the screen.]

Announcer (v/o): P-SPAN. The Political Channel.

PCW is Politico War on P-SPANTaped on Friday May 5th Revere, Massachusetts

BACKROOMDuring the hectic moments leading up to the show, six men attempted to hash out the booking for the upcoming Loose Cannons Unleashed 10 super show on May 14th: Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell of the American Patriots, Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer of the Progressive Alliance, and ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann and CSPN CEO Mark Splitter.

At issue? Who would be the challengers for the marquee matches of the night- the PCW Title match and Tag Team Title match. Schumer threatened to shut down the whole show if a Progressive Alliance wrestler was not put in either match citing the lack of opportunities given to the P.A. Ryan and McConnell insisted that one of the American Patriot wrestlers be included in the PCW Title match.

And as for the new and improved Sports Entertainment Corporation backed by the full corporate force of CSPN, they demanded a tag title shot for recently reformed former two time PCW Tag Team champions Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit.

No mention of title opportunities for Les Miserables William Daniels Bryan and tag team Ray McAvay and Chris Escondido or any other independent faction.

And where was PCW CEO Donald J. Trump during all this?

PCW OWNER DAWN McGILL’S OFFICE Trump does a little commiserating…

Donald Trump: You know, running PCW is a lot harder than I thought it was.

Dawn McGill: Yeah, no **BLEEP** Sherlock

**

Fast forward to the start of the show. Ryan, McConnell, Schumer, Pelosi, McMann, and Splitter walked out to the stage and made the announcement. Joining them on stage, the members of the Progressive Alliance, American Patriots, and the SEC.

Loose Cannons Unleashed 10 Co-Main Event

PCW Tag Team Title:Starz N. Stripes and Magnum P.O.’d (American Patriots) ©vs. James the Jeep Worker and Union Jack Taylor (Progressive Alliance) vs. Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit (Sports Entertainment Corporation)

PCW Title:Yamamoto Tanaka (Sports Entertainment Corporation) vs. Texas Jack (American Patriots) vs. The Ultimate Social Justice Warrior (Progressive Alliance)

CSPN CEO Mark Splitter hailed the announcement and the exclusion of wrestlers from the ‘lesser factions’ who ‘probably don’t deserve to have the opportunity to wrestle for titles. That brought a few boos from the crowd.

McMann got on the microphone and again claimed that adding an ‘independent’ wrestler who does not wrestle for one of the ‘big three’ factions to the match would be the equivalent to the NCAA adding Western Michigan of the Mid-American Conference to college football’s ‘chosen four’ tournament to determine the national champion.

More boos.

MATCH 1: Jobber (pronounced Joe-bare) D’Hut w/a surprise special guest vs.‘The One Man Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism (Progressive Alliance)-Jobber is dangerous- for roughly thirty seconds or so before he runs out of gas. Chism looks down, defeated, and distraught before the match at being excluded from wrestling for the PCW title next week. Jobber attacks at the bell and takes a surprised Chism to the floor leading to a countout tease. Chism works them back into the ring. He goes for broke but misses a high cross off the ropes. Jobber rains down right hands and maintains control.

Inexplicitly, Emmanuel Macron, then candidate for French President, shows up at ringside out of the blue and blows white powder into Chism’s face. Jobber then locks him up in the sleeper hold and steals an upset win.

WINNER: Jobber D’Hut

Post-match, Chism, bewildered at what just took place, simply shakes his head and walks to the back.

E.J. Flack came out next with the Millennial Man. MM gets on the microphone and again demands a title shot- stating that he’s more than put in the time needed, he’s rowed the boat long enough for him to be entitled to a chance at a title belt. Flack visibly rolls his eyes and tries to get him back on track.

E.J. Flack: …forget about that…forget about ‘rowing the boat,’ sometimes in life, you have to face the big monster thingy. Sometimes in life, you have to take on something that’s bigger than you even if its huge tusks can shred you to bits in seconds…even if its jagged teeth can tear through you like a hot knife through warm butter. Sometimes when you’re climbing life’s mountain and come up against insurmountable odds, you have to…

Flack pauses for dramatic effect.

Crowd: …‘Narfle the Garthok!’

MATCH 2: Ultimate Social Justice Warrior (Progressive Alliance) vs. The Millennial Man w/E.J. Flack-USJW wastes little time and effort on the millennial. He fires rights and slams MM into the buckles. USJW follows with a powerslam for 2. More USJW offense follows: bicycle kick, a second powerslam, and then he drills MM with a steel chair. USJW with rights and clotheslines as he completely dominates and by the end of the match, Flack shakes his head, throws up his hands, and turns to go back to the dressing room.

WINNER: Ultimate Social Justice Warrior

Post-match, the USJW continues his assault on MM until Ken Worth- American Trucker, of all people, came to his aid. Worth chases USJW out of the ring.

After Nurse Nellie and the PCW clean up crew scrape up what’s left of the Millennial Man, a man in an expensive suit and bow-tie walks to the ring and climbs in. he motions for Kimber Marshall to take a temporary powder while he’s been given the honor and privilege of introducing a living deity. The announcer guy then hushes the crowd.

Announcer Guy (in a voice not unlike Michael Buffer): Ladies and gentlemen. I present to you the almost universally-worshipped king of the sun gods of all creation. He commands the chariot that rode across the sky during the day. He is the great, fiery globe in the sky, a welcome, nurturing presence to honor the season. He is the inspiration for those who would throw virgins into the gaping maw of a volcano – perhaps an Icelandic volcano – even though such shenanigans haven’t been acceptable since the 1950s. And just for your reference, he is, for 32 years in a row, proven to be one of UC San Diego‘s most enduring traditions in the Sun God festival- an all-day music festival celebrated by more than 20,000 students, alumni and friends. But that’s not important.

The lights turn off and a small spotlight illuminates the stage. First out, a group of former Arizona State sorority sisters walk out taking selfies of themselves on their cell phones and then texting them onto their twitter accounts. Next, two men follow carrying a golden sedan chair holding a six foot seven inch, two hundred and eighty pound man dressed in long flowing robes to the ring. Rah’s minions Bob Nye- Foot Fetish Guy, former children’s show host Happy Mango, former pro wrestler Baron Von Munchke- master of the claw hold, and some guy dressed as Captain Obvious follow.

Announcer Guy: Either way, you should thank your lucky stars and kiss his royal ass for gracing you with his presence here tonight. I give to you…the Sunshine God…RAAAAAAAAH!

The procession winds its way to the ring. The camera pans over to the sorority sisters. They continue to make obnoxious faces, like the duck face expression among others, and take multiple selfies. The procession stops at the ring steps and Rah climbs out of his golden sedan chair. He takes in the acclamation from the crowd and climbs into the ring.

MATCH 3: Rah w/his Entourage vs. Ken Worth-American Trucker w/Brad Company and Tequila Sheila-perennial fan favorite Rah and Worth engage in a fast paced run through. Worth tries to take control but Rah fights back. He lands the big boot to the head and makes a quick cover for two. Worth looks to work the arm, but Rah cut him off with a back elbow strike and hits a Sunspot (Snake Eyes) for another two count. Worth then hits a head scissors and dropkick. Worth crawls over to Tequila Sheila and makes out with her for two seconds. Sheila hands Worth a blender to use on Rah.   Bob Nye-Foot Fetish Guy sneaks up and starts kissing the top of Sheila’s foot- yes, that wacky Bob Nye. This amused Worth but Brad Company yanked Nye out of the ring and flings him to the floor.

Rah hits a clothesline. He lifts Worth up in the air and slams him down (Solstice Slam!). Company tries to interfere but Rah whips him into the corner and Baron Von Munchke slaps on the CLAW!   With Company out of commission, Rah maintains control. He hits the running knee strike to Worth and then grounds the American Trucker with the body scissors. Worth fights out and hits a hip toss. Both men trade strikes. Worth gets distracted when Rah’s entourage- four former sorority sisters- jump up on the ring apron and start taking selfies of themselves. Rah takes Worth down and hits the jumping double stomp for 2. Worth fights back by using his noggin…aka head butts and sends Rah to the floor. Rah tries to get back to the ring. Sheila trips him up and then Worth launches himself over the top rope and takes the Sunshine God down.

They battle to the apron. Rah hits a belly to back suplex. He goes high risk up top, but Sheila knocks him off balance and the double stomp misses. Worth goes for the Jake Brake but Rah rolls into a cradle for 2. Head kick and German Suplex by Rah and he ends the match with the ‘EYE of RAHHHHHHHHH (Jack knife powerbomb).

WINNER: Rah!

Next, Professor McCarthy and his Flock (entire Green World Order: GreenPete/PeaceNick/‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee/Peta from PETA, The Young Jerks: Zenk Cryger, James Idahola, Anna, Codee Pink, and Emily S. List) come to the ring.

The group is serenaded by boos.

Professor McCarthy: Once again my friends, it is time for a teachable moment to the unenlightened in our audience tonight. I will read from the good book- the good book that tells us things that are correct or incorrect to say, think, or believe.

The professor opens up the book.

Professor McCarthy: And the book says: ‘those who are unenlightened, mainly in what is termed as ‘flyover country’ or red states and counties, who aren’t as worldly as we are, should throw their support towards those are.   That would be- people like us.

The GWO, Codee Pink, List, and the others listen raptly as he speaks.

Professor McCarthy: Once they show support for the right and approved candidates, the unenlightened should then simply shut up and do what they are told to do. The unenlightened should then believe what they are told to believe. The unenlightened should think what we tell them to think. The unenlightened should say what they are told to say- read what they are told to read. Listen to what they are told to listen to. Because they are incapable of making these choices for themselves.

All: Here, here.

Professor McCarthy: If one of the unenlightened try to express their unenlightened view, you shall immediately and forcefully shout them down and shout down all ideas, thoughts, statements our enemies make opposing us as they are unenlightened and their ideas, thoughts, statements are dangerous to the greater good.

All: Here, here.

Professor McCarthy: Tonight, the Green World Order will defeat Ray McAvay and Chris Escondido and put an end to this Les Miserables nonsense once and for all. The Les Miserables claim they speak for the people. But they are wrong, the Les Miserables do not speak for the people. We speak for the people because the people aren’t smart enough to speak or think for thems-

♫ “Do you hear the people sing? – Singing the song of angry men?”

The camera pans up to the Les Miserables section of the arena.  Ray McAvay high fives PCW Champion William Daniels Bryan while Charlie Blackwell and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido stands up from their seat.

♫ “It is the music of the people. – Who will not be slaves again!”

Also rising from their seats, General DeBauchery- who looks like a bizarre combination of the AWA’s Colonel DeBeers and Lt. Aldo from Inglorious Basterds, sporting a black captain’s hat right out of World War II, smoking a cigar and grinning obnoxiously, Al Cahall- sporting six pack abs…oh…that’s a six pack in front of his abs and the man smoking a cigarette in violation of several anti-smoking ordinances…as usual, Nic Koteen.

♫ “When the beating of your heart – Echoes the beating of the drums – There is a life about to start – When tomorrow comes.”

McAvay stands up and edges towards the aisle.  Bryan, Blackwell, and Escondido follow.  Then General DeBauchery, Cahall, and Koteen.  Before McAvay and Escondido start to descend down the steps towards the rail separating the stands from the floor, McAvay turns around and gestures to the Les Miserables to join him.

♫ “Will you join in our crusade? – Who will be strong and stand with me? – Somewhere beyond the barricade – Is the world you long to see.”

The Les Miserables rise up from their seats and line up behind him and Escondido as the pair start their way down towards the ring.

♫ “Then join in the fight – That will give you the right to be free!”

The camera spots Stormy and Starbrite, both sporting the brand new PCW Ray McAvay “Show Up. Punch In. Shut Up. Get to Work” baseball jersey, and Bert the Janitor marching along with the other Les Miserables as McAvay and the procession head down to the ring.

♫ “Do you hear the people sing? – Singing the song of angry men. – It is the music of the people. – Who will not be slaves again!”

McAvay, Bryan, Blackwell, Escondido, and the rest reach the bottom of the steps.   One by one, they climb through the railing down to the floor and march towards the ring.

♫ “When the beating of your heart – Echoes the beating of the drums – There is a life about to start – When tomorrow comes.”

MATCH 4: Les Miserables: ‘Red Solo Plastic Cup’ Ray McAvay and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido vs. The Green World Order: GreenPete and Extreme Vegan Brock Cole Lee-McAvay and Escondido attack the second they reach the ring. The next few minutes were chaotic as all four men brawled in the ring and the Les Miserables and Professor McCarthy’s Flock brawling outside the ring. McAvay nearly gets a Dragon Sleeper submission on GreenPete but Peta from PETA, Codee Pink, and Emily S List pull the referee out.

Escondido picks up the pace and uses his technical skills to outclass Brock Cole Lee. But GreenPete interferes and clubs Escondido with a chair. Then Lee lays in mounted rights in the corner. The GWO work double teams, GreenPete tags in and goes face to face with Escondido. They do some back and forth spots. Finally, Escondido sends GreenPete to the floor. McAvay tags back in and catches GreenPete off the ropes with the boot to the balls. Then an overhead toss. The Flock are making noise at ringside as GreenPete gets frequent flier miles as McAvay flings him in the air over and over. Peta rushes in and clips McAvay’s knee allowing GreenPete and Lee to maul him. Lee takes the lead for his team But McAvay eventually hits a spinebuster. Lee cuts him off and continues to attack the leg. But Lee misses a leg drop and McAvay hot tags to Escondido who runs wild hitting slingblades on GreenPete, Lee, the Young Jerks Zenk Cryger and James Idahola, and then PeaceNick.

McAvay back in and he atomic dropped GreenPete and followed up with the neckbreaker/running bulldog combo aka Shakin’ and Stirred.  Leg drop for 2. McAvay rubs his nose and Bert the Janitor tosses a Big Bertha Driver to him.

*WHAP*

Down goes GreenPete. McAvay covers and gets the pin.

WINNER: Les Miserables ‘Red Solo Plastic Cup’ Ray McAvay and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido

Post-match, Professor McCarthy’s Flock pour into the ring followed by the Les Miserables and once again the scene becomes a free for all.

PCW Owner Dawn McGill, on crutches due to the attack on her knee the week before at a Missouri Valley Wrestling show, comes out accompanied by her friend – who happens to be Russian – Svetlana Kovaleski.

Dawn McGill: That’s right. You tell Professor McCarthy’s thugs just what you think of them!

The fans in Revere, Massachusetts oblige and rain down more boos and jeers.

Dawn McGill: Listen and listen close. That *BLEEP* may work in Berkeley, California where the California Dream is a *BLEEP*-ing Ponsi Scheme on the backs of middle class taxpayers…

Professor McCarthy’s face becomes etched with anger and he turns towards the PCW owner.

Dawn McGill: But that’s okay. As long as I own PCW, we will never…EVER…run a show in California.

McCarthy becomes even more enraged as the crowd roars in approval.

Dawn McGill: But here’s the real reason I’ve come out here-

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

On cue, ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann and CSPN CEO Mark Splitter walk out.

Mr. McMann: Dawn…before you get hurt again…

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Mr. McMann: No, no. I truly do not wish any further harm on Miss McGill. She’s had a rough enough few weeks as it is. Hell, she’s had a rough past year. (turns to McGill) Okay. I want you to be very careful with what you are about to say. I worked out the booking problem for Loose Cannons Unleashed 10 using my expertise in sports entertainment programming and Mark Splitter’s expertise. You don’t want to ruin what’s destined to be a great show just because you’re jealous of my genius.

Dawn McGill: I just have two words for you- *BLEEP* you. You don’t get it. Paul Ryan, Mitch McConnell, Nancy Pelosi, and Chuck Schumer don’t get it. I wonder sometimes if Donald Trump actually gets it.   PCW is not here for you. PCW is not here for Mark Splitter. PCW is not here for the Sports Entertainment Corporation. PCW is not here for the American Patriots. PCW is not here for the Progressive Alliance. PCW is here for…the fans.

McGill pauses for the resulting ovation.

Dawn McGill: That’s right. From the beginning, when we stopped the practice of liberally giving out free tickets to a PCW shows and opened up the front sections of seats to ordinary folks instead to VIP’s and political friends- PCW has been about the people. Do you know who’s not for the people? (points at McMann and Splitter) You aren’t. (points at the back) The American Patriots aren’t and neither are the Progressive Alliance. You aren’t turning PCW into your own personal BCS and excluding wrestlers from title contention. No. That’s not happening on my watch.

McMann confronts McGill.

Mr. McMann: You need to be careful and stay in your lane. There’s a lot of money riding on Loose Cannons Unleashed and I’m not going to allow you to-

*THWACK*

*THWACK…THWACK…THWACK*

McGill bends the steel crutch with three shots to the top of McMann’s head. Splitter reaches out to grab McGill…

*THWACK*

McGill nails him with the crutch (now bent at a ninety degree angle) and sends Splitter spinning to the floor. This brings American Patriot’s Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell, Progressive Alliance’s Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer out and they implore McGill not to do what she’s about to do.

Dawn McGill: No. You guys had a chance to do the right thing. You blew it. First off, PCW does not do three way dances for titles.  It’s one on one…or two on two for tag teams.  So here’s how we’re going to do this. Tomorrow night (May 6th) in Burlington, Massachusetts, six tag teams and four singles wrestlers will vie for title shots at Loose Cannons Unleashed 10.

PCW Tag Team Title:James the Jeep Worker and Union Jack Taylor (Progressive Alliance) Big Oil and Kirk Walstreit (Sports Entertainment Corporation)‘Red Solo Plastic Cup’ Ray McAvay and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Les Miserables) The Dork Dynasty: Leonard and Sheldon Robertson The Bi-Partisan Dream Team: Blue Dog D and RINO- The Wonk Machine The Bomb Brothers: A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb

PCW Title:Texas Jack (American Patriots) The Ultimate Social Justice Warrior (Progressive Alliance) William Daniels Bryan (Les Miserables) Rah- The Sunshine God

RAY McAVAY PROMO‘Red Solo Plastic Cup’ Ray McAvay, flanked by William Daniels Bryan, Chris Escondido, and Heartland Champion Charlie Blackwell, and several other Les Miserables, is in the ring with a special guest.

Ray McAvay: This is Kay, I met her at a meet and greet earlier today and she has an interesting story. You see. Kay used to work for a company as a collections clerk. She was there eight years…eight years. The company, located in a smaller town, merged a couple times and became this big corporation. Kay’s job was upgraded and she was literally kicked to the curb.

Ray puts his arm around Kay.

Ray McAvay: It didn’t matter that she’d been a loyal employee for eight years. They didn’t try to find a different position for her. They just showed her the door. So long. Thanks for playing.

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Ray McAvay: That’s right. Unfortunately, there are more people like Kay not only in the Chicago metropolitan area but all over the country. Big corporations form or merge and the worker ants are the ones who usually get squashed in the process. I am so thankful, so fortunate to be standing here being able to live out my own ‘Field of Dreams.’ I get to make a living doing something that I love to do- wrestle. Perform in front of fifteen thousand people every night. So many people don’t have that opportunity. Big corporations use their money not for the common good, not for the advancement of their employees, but to ‘win the game.’ Corporate executives…like Mr. McMann and Mark Splitter for example…work to rig the game in their favor at the expense of people like Kay. Bigger isn’t necessarily better. And Ray McAvay is beholden to no one. I wrestle for people like Kay and I’m damn proud to give away tickets that I’ve purchased myself to people like her…to the people I met at the three employment staffing agencies we stopped at after I worked out this morning. These are the people I want to align myself with.

MAIN EVENT/NON-TITLE MATCH: PCW Champion Yamamoto Tanaka (Sports Entertainment Corporation) vs. Texas Jack (American Patriots)-Texas Jack attacks at the bell and works over the champion in the corner. Tanaka fights back with right hands. Texas Jack hits a running cross body. Tanaka answers back with one of his own. He sends Texas Jack sends sprawling to the floor and hits a cannonball off of the apron. Back in the ring, Texas Jack hits the big dive and looks to follow up but Tanaka nails him with a powerbomb.   Texas Jack fights him off and slams Tanaka to the apron. Back in and Texas Jack goes senton but Tanaka rolls out of the way. Texas Jack fights off Tanaka’s Japanese SuperDestroyer and sends him to the corner. He rushes in and hits the corner cannonball. Texas Jack hits another cannonball and covers for 2.  Tanaka hits a spin kick out of nowhere for 2. The champion follows with a dropkick and body slam for 2. Texas Jack tries a desperation cannonball…misses…and eats a superkick. Japanese SuperDestroyer finishes Texas Jack and the champion wins.

WINNER: Yamamoto Tanaka

[‘Trumpet Concerto No. 2 in D major – 3 Allegro assai’ begins to play in the background and P-SPAN quickly cuts away to another political event.]

[brooktiniwrite]

Chapter Four Confusion (part 2)

Bryn allowed DeDe to drive her Ford and begrudgingly allowed Ryder to sit shotgun. He refused to pick them up unless he could sit in the front seat, so Bryn, Triston and Tailynn occupied back seats while Jamison scrunched into the back of her SUV with a flask filled all the way to the brim with Jack Daniels. He’d grown fond of the whiskey in Middle school and apparently he hadn’t switched his drink of choice.

Jamison passed it up to her.

“My gift to you.” He said as he lopped both arms over the back seat. “Happy Birthday.”

“What a treasure,” She turned to Jamison and grabbed the bottle, musing: “Jamison sharing his precious Jack.”

She took a gulp. When she was done, Jamison snatched it.

“Don’t say I never did anything for you.” He pointed a finger at Bryn before he returned to the back of the SUV.

They made it to Downtown Bend quickly. DeDe loved driving fast. She pulled along a curb and everyone filed out but DeDe and Ryder.

“Call us when you are ready.” She called out before she sped away.

They followed the sidewalk toward several rows of buildings. The sun had already dipped below the white mountains, causing streaks of pink and purple to loom over the town. This was far different from the bar hopping Bryn had done in Portland. The skies in the city were hardly this brilliant, and the next bar was only two steps away. Business windows in Portland were plastered with neon lights, lines of people waited to get inside, and drunken girls leaned dizzily against the walls. Here, only a few people walked back and forth on the sidewalks, and each building had it’s own intricate spacing.

“Do you care where we go?” Triston asked.

“No,” Bryn answered honestly. “I wouldn’t know where to start.”

“We’ll head to Duke’s first, it’s cheap and it’s got pool and a dancing. Win-win.” Triston replied as he and Jamison hung a left.

As they hung another left, Bryn could hear the repetitive thump of loud music. It came from a large building made of round logs. A patio wrapped around the bar and neon lights spilled from the windows.

Bryn’s eyes were focused on the porch stairs beneath her wobbling heels when she ran straight into Jamison’s back. He didn’t sway, he stood shock still in front of a thick chested bouncer, smiling nervously.

"What’s up Troy?” Jamison’s voice hid a thin tremble, one masked so expertly that only Bryn could detect it.

She nearly laughed. Was the effervescent, scrappy Jamison intimidated? 

The bouncer’s steely eyes twitched in between the two boys. He was a large man and his belly was so round that his black shirt stretched tight over the top of it. Firmly, he crossed his hands over his chest and gave a raspy harrumph.

“Sorry boys, not tonight.” He pushed them aside with a thick, hairy arm.

The bouncer switched his gaze to Bryn and Tailynn. With the hand he wasn’t using to barricade Jamison and Triston, he reached an open palm.

“Ladies, I.D’s please?”

Bryn fumbled for hers. There had to be some way to get them into the bar. She had worked her girlish charm on bouncers before, but she doubted this man would fall for it.

“Come on Troy, let us in. We won’t cause any trouble.” Jamison scowled.

“No can do, boys.“ Troy answered. "Manager’s tired a’ you two hustling every game a’ pool under the sun.”

Bryn finally felt her wallet in the depths of her purse. She slipped out her ID and set it into the Bouncer’s sausage like fingers. As cute as she could possibly manage, she batted her eyelashes at the Beefy man.

“Excuse me, sir. It’s my birthday this weekend and I rarely get to see my two favorite cousins.” She lied. “Could you please let them in?”

The bouncer frowned.

“Please.” She pleaded again.

The man gave out a loud harrumph.

“Only on a count a’ yer birthday.” He drawled.

Jamison pushed his way to Bryn’s side, clasping her shoulders.

“Thanks, Troy.” He said without the least bit of enthusiasm. He pushed Bryn passed Troy and through the double doors as he called over his shoulder. “We’ll be good, I promise.”

“Just tonight!” Troy called out angrily.

 "So unfair.” Jamison ignored Troy as he reached Bryn’s side. “A guy could never get passed Troy like that.”

Bryn shrugged, smug with her girlish charm. Cockily, she posted up against one of the wooden pillars inside the bar. She opened her mouth to gloat, but a tingle silenced her. Her fingertips buzzed at the connection between her palm and the pillar, flushing all the way through her chest and shooting straight through her. 

Bryn’s vision swirled before her like it had in her room, quick and forceful. She tried to call out to Jamison, to warn him, but it was too late. Darkness took over until she was no longer inside of herself.

It was another dream, but this time she was aware of it. She tried to shake it, but she couldn’t shake, not in this dream. She hadn’t a body to shake, but she could see her body. Somehow, she was above herself. She could see shades of blue and purple swallow her face. Blood smeared her across her nose and cheek. Slowly, the things around her body came to focus.People were screaming and brawling. Sirens chorused outside. Red and blue lights flashed.

Though this vision of her beaten, broken self was terrifying, she could only focus on how she’d gotten here. She felt embarrassed. Had she fainted? In a bar full of people? Bryn cursed. She wanted to wake up. Only moments ago she was having fun. Wake up, she thought to herself. WAKE UP.

     The images began to blur again and darkness closed in. This time she could feel her senses coming back. Her eyelids blinked forcefully until she was able to see what was truly in front of her, which were Jamison’s dark blue eyes, inches from her face. It took her what felt like minutes to realize that he was shaking her shoulders vigorously.

     “What the Hell Bryn!?” He shouted between shakes. “Are you ok?”

     Quickly, she grabbed at the irritating hands that shook her.

     “Stop!” She said firmly. “I just fainted for a second. It’s not a big deal.”

     She pushed his hands from her and helped herself up from the ground. She rushed to collect the things that had toppled from her purse. When she rose, she found that Triston and Tailynn had joined Jamison’s side.

     “That wasn’t a panic attack, was it?” Triston reached for her worriedly. “I’ve never seen you pass out like that before.”

     “No, I haven’t had one for awhile. I’ve moved onto fainting now.” Bryn dodged his helping hands embarrassedly.

People were whispering concerns to one another as they stared. Truthfully, Bryn was just as concerned. She’d never had a fainting spell two days in a row.

“Ugh,” She turned from the stares and started toward the bar. “If I buy the first round would you save me some embarrassment and pretend like that never happened?”

     “Are you sure you should be drinking after that?” Triston stumbled after Bryn. “Isn’t that a health issue?”

     “It’s fine.” Bryn clipped impatiently.

She could feel Jamison and Triston exchanging glances behind her, she even caught Jamison shrugging at Triston from the corner of her eye.

She slipped into a leather bar stool decorated with fringe and brass tooling. The bartender reached her right away, nodding happily as Bryn ordered four shots of whiskey and promptly handed him her card.

“What in the hell did you guys do to get on his bad side?” Bryn asked in attempts to change the subject. She swung her body to face the boys as they took their seats, then she jerked a thumb to where Troy was checking I.D’s “And don’t lie, because I know it’s more than hustling pool.”

Triston grinned. It lit up his whole face.

     “I didn’t do anything.” He settled, running a knuckle over his stubbled cleft chin. “Jamie’s the fighter, I’ve always got to calm his ass down.”

     Jamison poked his head over the bar, his dimples flashing so intensely that it made you want to pinch them.

“Nah, I am a good boy,” He said as the bartender set four empty glasses in front of Bryn.

Bryn scoffed at this. “Good boy” was hardly an accurate description. Jamison’s snide remarked earned another smile from Triston.

The bartender filled the glasses to the brim and Bryn slid them gracefully to their owners. She tipped hers back immediately, cringing at the after-taste.

     "Jamison and I are gonna play some pool.” Triston set his glass down with a clink. “Do you and Tailynn wanna come?”

“Nah.” Bryn dismissed his offer with only half of her attention.

She rose a hand, waving down the bartender for another, but Triston clapped a hand on Bryn’s shoulder, leaning into catch the man’s attention before she did.

“This girl is on my tab for the rest of the night. It’s her birthday.” He thrust a red debit card over the bar toward the man.

“Isn’t either, Triston.” Bryn attempted to argue. “You don’t have to do that. Save it for Saturday.”

“No way.” Triston tested back. “It’s my treat. I’m happy you’re here for the weekend.”

Bryn slunk back. Her cheeks flushing red. She had a hard time accepting gifts. Bashfully, she forced herself to accept it. Triston didn’t wait for a thank you. The barstools to Bryn’s left etched back as the boys set off.

The bartender looked like he came straight out of a 90s alternative rock band. Thick wavy hair fell to his shoulders. His V-neck was sporting a tuft of chest hair.

“Can I get an AMF, please?“ Bryn asked eagerly.

     "Feeling brave tonight?” The bartender questioned her drink choice.

     “Like he said, it’s my birthday.” Bryn said, but she couldn’t hold it back, she had to tell someone. Under her breath she mumbled: “and I am trying to get over a breakup.”

     The bartender nodded his head sadly, moving his hands quickly between bottles and glasses as he concocted her drink.

     “This will cheer you up.” He winked.

The glass was chilled and damp at the sides. She lowered her mouth to the straw that stuck from the cup, washing the sting of whiskey from her mouth.

Tailynn still held the jumbo shot glass in her hand. Her face wrinkled at the sight.

“You haven’t finished that!?” Bryn all but shouted.

“No.” Tailynn said, “This stuff is vile, and I don’t want to look like a wimp while we are being evaluated by some grade A hotties.”

Bryn looked around, searching for these “hotties” Tailynn spoke of.

“Bryn!” Tailynn scolded. She slapped Bryn���s shoulder so hard it stung.“You can’t look right after I’ve said something.”

“Oh.” Bryn lowered her head to her drink.

“Shit.” Taylinn grumbled and tossed the shot back as masculinely as a girl like her could. “They saw you looking. The cute one is walking over here.”

“You’re kidding.” Bryn fret.

She rose her drink to her mouth and slurped nervously, her lipstick leaving a faded maroon stain on the straw.

She flushed as a lanky man in a leather jacket slid into the stool beside her. Tailynn was right, there was something intriguing about this man. Bryn liked the way his brown hair fell around his face in perfectly quaffed ringlets, she like his approachable smile. Had she not been in such a foul mood, she might have enjoyed his company, but his friendliness only served as an annoyance.

He nodded to her drink, a flirtatious grin playing at his lips. “I couldn’t help but notice that you are almost done with your drink, and your friend over there is with out one."

Bryn looked down at her drink. Holy Hell she was. That really must have been some nervous gulping.

     “Are you planning on doing something about it?“ She said. She meant for it to be snarky, but halfway through she realized that he had definitely mistaken her wit for flirtation .

"Yes actually,” he laughed and moved in between the two girls.

He continued to talk, but Bryn didn’t pay attention. She glanced around, looking for the other man that accompanied her new friend. She found him leaning against the marbled counter. He looked a little rough, like maybe he worked an outside job. Building houses, Bryn imagined. His jaw drew a hard line, set strong in focus as he watched the T.V. above the bar. Truthfully, Bryn had to disagree with Tailynn, compared to this man the curly haired man beside her was by no means the “cute one” of the two.

     “Hello?” The man next to her tapped at her shoulder.

“Sorry, What did you say?”

"I was just asking what you wanted to drink.”

     “Oh, I’ll have whatever she is having.” Bryn waved at Tailynn quickly and then shot a glance back over to the handsome stranger, hoping that he hadn’t noticed her oggling.

The bartender poured red grenadine into 2 tall spindly glasses holding an orange liquid.

Yuck, tequila sunrises. Bryn reluctantly took the drink from the bartender. She should have known not to order the same thing as Tailynn. The girl lived off of sugar.

     “My friend and I are going to check out the D.J., you guys want to join?”

     Bryn frowned as she looked outside at the flashing lights. A booth was set, elevated from a crowd of people dancing tightly together.

     "We have to meet up with our friends at the pool tables.” Tailynn said. “But maybe we can meet you out there?”

“Cool, I’ll look for you.” He winked before he jerked his head at his friend. The friend, who had since unglued himself from the T.V., followed him outside.

     “Bryn, are you sure you don’t want to dance?” Tailynn asked once they were alone. "You love to dance.”

“I don’t know, I don’t feel like it.”

     Tailynn slumped her shoulders. She stirred her drink impatiently.

     “Whatever, I get it. you’re mad because Kyle’s being moody and blah blah blah. But I came here to have fun.” She picked up her purse and removed herself from the barstool. “Are you coming or not?”

     Bryn rolled her eyes. She rose from her seat after collecting her own purse and drink. As her feet hit the ground, her buzz turned into a drunk. She wobbled as she followed Tailynn.

Large pillars of carved wood sectioned off the Billiard Room. It was darker in this room than the bar, and the music was louder too.

     “I thought you two were supposed to be hustling games?” Bryn heard Tailynn tease as she approached their table.  "You sounded pretty famous, I was excited to see.“

     Jamison rose from a shot, sinking not one, but two solid colored balls into separate pockets with a loud crack. He pointed his pool stick across the table and toward a dark corner.

     "Not with Neighborhood Watch out there. Troy won’t take his eyes off us.”

     “Damn,” Bryn swirled.

     “Yeah,” Tailynn agreed as she snatched Bryn’s purse and tucked it next to hers under the pool table. “Well, while you two have the time of your lives playing pool, Bryn and I are gonna go dance.”

     Jamison, who was bent over his next shot, tossed his head back in frustration.

     “You guys aren’t going to go dance with those two boneheads that swooped in the second we left, are you?”

     Bryn and Tailynn looked to one another, debating on whether or not to fib.

     “Really? Those guys are tools.” Triston said disapprovingly as he joined Jamison’s side.

     “Seemed pretty nice to me.” Bryn countered their protests. “He even bought me this disgusting drink.”

     She thrusted the drink in the air. She hadn’t even taken a sip of it.

     “Just because he bought you a drink, doesn’t make him a nice guy.” Triston snapped. “I know those guys. Kyle wouldn’t want you hanging around them, let alone dancing with them.”

     Tailynn went silent, but fire surged through Bryn’s bones.

     “Well, Kyle dumped me this morning.” Had she not been so tipsy, she would have never came out with it this way. “I hardly think he cares who I hang around at the bars with.“

“Wha-” Triston looked to Jamison for help, but Jamison provided none. Jamison had yet to meet Kyle, and his disposition made that clear. “Bryn, I’m so sorry. I didn’t-”

"If you need us, we’ll be dancing.” Bryn turned to face the patio.

As she took a step, she felt a hand clasp hers and jerk her backward. It was Triston.

     “Look,“ He said. ” I know you’re mad. You’ve obviously had a long day, but I don’t like those guys.“

[pcwpolwrestling]

McConnell Invokes the Atomic Option: PCW on P-SPAN

PCW CHAMPION: ‘The Prairie Populist’ William Daniels Bryan (Les Miserables) #1 Contender: ‘Wall Street Market Analyst with the Man Crush on ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit’ Kirk Walstreit (American Patriots)

PCW TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS: Starz N. Stripes and Magnum P.O.’d (American Patriots)#1 Contender: ‘Red Solo Plastic Cup’ Ray McAvay and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Les Miserables)

HEARTLAND CHAMPION: Charlie Blackwell (Les Miserables)#1 Contender: Gator Bates (Sports Entertainment Corporation)

=============================

[ON SCREEN GRAPHIC: Blue background. The top of the Capitol Building occupies the left hand side of the television screen.

Centered in the middle of the screen: “P-SPAN. THE POLITICAL CHANNEL.”]

Announcer (off screen): The P-SPAN Network bring you long-form public affairs programming from the nation’s capital and are a public service of…

[ON SCREEN GRAPHIC: Logos of twenty three different cable and satellite television companies replace the Capitol Building and P-SPAN graphic.]

Announcer (v/o): …your television provider.

[ON SCREEN GRAPHIC: Returns to the blue background with the top of the Capitol Building occupying the left hand side of the television screen with “P-SPAN. THE POLITICAL CHANNEL.” centered in the middle of the screen.]

Announcer (v/o): P-SPAN. The Political Channel.

THURSDAY APRIL 6TH – PCW HOUSE SHOW – SANDUSKY, OHIO

Since PCW CEO Donald Trump took over, the Progressive Alliance and American Patriots have been at loggerheads over personnel issues and matters finally came to a head at last night’s PCW house show on the north coast of Lake Erie in Sandusky, Ohio.

With a frustrated PCW Owner Dawn McGill literally pulling her hair out as a backlog of paperwork grew into an impressive tower that threatened to tip over at any moment, the Progressive Alliance’s Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi continued to hold up appointments made by CEO Trump to staff.

McGill tried to reason with both sides and stressed that both sides needed to work together. Schumer then discussed it with the P.A.’s supporters, Professor McCarthy, Codee Pink, Emily S. List, ‘The One Man Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism etal.   Mitch McConnell spoke with the A.P.’s, the Religious Right, Steve ‘The Elk’ Elkins, Starz N. Stripes…etal. And yet no one would budge.

Finally, McGill threw up her hands. That’s how her night began.

Of course, McGill had other issues waiting for her when she returned to her office.

The Millennial Man was sitting in a chair and he had one thing on his mind- a title shot. Mind you, the fact that he hadn’t lasted much more than a minute in a singles match up to this point didn’t matter. He’d put his time in. The Millennial Man felt he deserved his title shot. McGill?

Dawn McGill: Are you freakin’ kidding me? We don’t hand out title shots as participation prizes.

Not so much.

The millennial’s manager E.J. Flack warmed the audience up before the match with PCW ring announcer Kimber Marshall.

E.J. Flack and Kimber Marshall

E.J. Flack: Ladies and gentlemen. My name is E.J. Flack and I am not here to change traditions. I am not here to pursue an agenda. I am here in PCW because it is a challenge.   And I eat challenges for breakfast. That’s why I’m here. And that’s why I am still managing the young man who’s about to come to the ring and

NARFLE THE GARTHOK!

E.J. Flack: An oar is nothing more than a mere snack for a Garthok. A Garthok uses an oar as frickin’ toothpick. And a boat becomes dilapidated in time.

Kimber Marshall: And Western Michigan owns the trademark for ‘Row the Boat.’

E.J. Flack: Actually, P.J. Fleck and Western Michigan came to an agreement on that so his agent now owns the trademark.

Kimber Marshall: Oh.

E.J. Flack: So, when you’re climbing life’s mountain and come up against insurmountable odds, you don’t row something, you…

Flack raises his arm and the PCW fans respond.

NARFLE THE GARTHOK

Flack also hawked his new, special edition t-shirt as well…

Ken Worth- The American Trucker (Les Miserables) defeated The Millennial Man w/Manager E.J. Flack-before the match, Worth got wind that the Millennial Man had marched into McGill’s office and demanded a title shot. He then proceeded to make the five minutes MM spent in the ring during the match- yes, he actually lasted five minutes- as hellish as possible. Even Flack was telling Worth at the end to just pin him and get it over.   Worth hit his finisher for the THIRD time- The Jake Brake- and finally made the cover.

Post-match, a disgusted Worth walked out of the ring before the referee could raise his arm in victory and went right to the back.

Nolan Ralph Anderson aka…NRA and Mitch Thomas-American Taxpayer defeat Jobber the Hut and ‘The Bureaucrat’ Andy Riley-NRA and the American Taxpayer return to PCW and get a win in their first trip to the ring. Jobber the Hut, all 375 doughy pounds of him, is always a dangerous foe- for the first thirty seconds or so. Then he tires out. Riley is the master of red tape. NRA and Thomas withstood the first half minute onslaught and cut through the bureaucracy for the victory.

The Bi-Partisan Dream Team: Rino-The Wonk Machine (American Patriots) and Blue Dog D (Progressive Alliance) defeated A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb w/Daisy Cutter-Bomb-Striking a blow against partisan warfare, Blue Dog D and RINO worked hand in hand to overcome a size and weight advantage to score the win. The Bi-Partisan Dream Team also picked up a break midway through when Daisy Cutter-Bomb interjected herself into the match one too many times and was sent to the back.

However, not everyone was thrilled with the outcome.

Post-match, Berkeley, California Professor McCarthy and his Flock: Codee Pink, Emily S. List, Green World Order (PeaceNick, GreenPete, ‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee, Peta from PETA and ‘Radishing’ Rick Rube and the Young Jerks (Zenk Cryger, James Idahola, and Anna stormed the ring and attacked the Bi-Partisan Dream Team.

Professor McCarthy: We shouldn’t be working with the American Patriots. We should be shouting them down just like we should be shouting down anyone who disagrees with us. Let this be a lesson to everyone. If you are unenlightened, and I’m talking to you in ‘flyover country,’ red states and, counties all across the nation who aren’t as worldly as we are, either you throw their support towards those are intellectually superior…like us…or we will shout you down.

McCarthy and his Flock also vowed to filibuster the rest of the matches in the show to make it clear just how serious they were.

NON-TITLE MATCH: PCW Tag Team Champions Starz N. Stripes and Magnum P.O.’d (American Patriots) vs. The Dork Dynasty: Leonard and Sheldon Robertson w/Penny and Amy- no contest -and filibuster they did. McCarthy and the Flock swarmed all over the tag champions and the nerdy duck call decoy fabricators and master’s students aka…The Dork Dynasty.  Referee Davey Keels immediately threw the match out.

‘Red Solo Plastic Cup’ Ray McAvay and ‘No Frills’ Chris Escondido (Les Miserables) defeat The Green World Order: ‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee and ‘Radishing’ Rick Rube via DQ -this one barely got underway before the Young Jerks and GreenPete hit the ring. Referee Kevin Barry immediately DQ’d the GWO. Les Miserables’s Ken Worth, PCW Champion William Daniels Bryan and Heartland Champion Charlie Blackwell hauled ass to the ring to make the save.

Things seemed to calm down until out of nowhere, two men dressed in all black, with black masks over their heads ran down and attacked the Les Miserables. The two men then roll into the ring and take the microphone.

To a chorus of boos, they again announce themselves as the Deep State and proclaim that they are the true power behind PCW- not PCW CEO Donald Trump…not PCW Owner Dawn McGill.

Deep State: Regardless of who claims to be in control of PCW and running the day by day business, the Deep State is supreme and we will wipe out anyone who dares oppose-

That brought out PCW Owner Dawn McGill…

Dawn McGill: Oh really now?

…she whistled to the back and six armed police officers marched out.

The GWO, Codee Pink, Emily S. List, and the Young Jerks became apoplectic that the PCW owner was once again calling on the long arm of the law to restore order (see the March 24th show in Poughkeepsie, where McGill had police haul the Progressive Alliance, Professor McCarthy and the Flock and even the American Patriots out of the arena after pulling the same stuff).

McGill waved goodbye to Deep State as they were led away but did not send McCarthy and the Flock home.

HEARTLAND TITLE MATCH: Charlie Blackwell © (Les Miserables) defeated Gator Bates (Sports Entertainment Corporation)-no ‘Sports Entertainment Genius’ Mr. McMann. No Phil Finebaum. No CSPN.   No interference. With the SEC in flux and rumors flying around about what Mr. McMann intended to do next, Blackwell took care of business over the distracted Bates and won with the Katahajime to retain the Heartland belt.

Yamamoto Tanaka vs. Kirk Walstreit (American Patriots)- no contest-if McGill thought that removing Deep State from the arena would put an end to the mischief, she was wrong. After sitting out the previous match, Professor McCarthy and The Flock returned to ringside and proceeded to blow up the eagerly anticipated match between the former four-time PCW champion Tanaka and the number one contender for the PCW title Walstreit.

Referee Keels audibly sighed when ‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee and Zenk Cryger hit the ring before he threw the match out.

Then to add to McGill’s headache, Starz N. Stripes, Magnum P.O.’d, and Texas Jack from the American Patriots ran down to aid Walstreit and, indirectly, Tanaka.

And that brought the Progressive Alliance to the ring in full force: James the Jeep Worker, Union Jack Taylor, the Ultimate Social Justice Warrior, and ‘The One Man Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism hurried down to assault the American Patriots. Professor McCarthy then threw his two extra cents in for good measure and addressed McGill, still backstage, directly.

Professor McCarthy: I still don’t think you understand, Miss McGill, so let me spell it out for you one more time.  This is how we do things in Berkeley and other college campuses all across the country. Tonight, we are shouting down you, the American Patriots, and all the unenlightened, ignorant people inside this arena who need us tell them what to think, what to believe, what to say. We told you we were going to filibuster until we get our way and get what we want and that’s exactly what we’re going to do.

The crowd held their breath and waited for PCW Owner to come out but this time Mitch McConnell (R-KY) from the PCW Executive Committee walked out onto the stage and not Dawn McGill. McConnell was backed by the Judicial Crisis Network, The National Rifle Association, and other conservative groups.

Mitch McConnell: I told PCW CEO Donald Trump that I’m not a big fan of changing the rules but enough’s enough. We’re going to fight fire with fire. But if the Progressive Alliance is going to use Professor McCarthy and his Flock as their proxies then we’re going to respond in kind.

The Progressive Alliance’s Chuck Schumer (D-NY) with NARAL Pro-Choice America, MoveOn.Org and the Services Employee International Union in tow, walked out shouting ‘YOU CAN’T DO THIS…YOU CAN’T DO THIS!”

Mitch McConnell: Tonight, I am invoking the Atomic Option.

A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb

Chuck Schumer: NOOOOOO!

All Schumer can do is watch as A. Tom Bomb, Hy Drogen Bomb, and younger sister Daisy Cutter-Bomb dash to the ring and start tearing through Professor McCarthy’s forces. Atomic Powerbomb to Brock Cole Lee by A-Bomb. Hydrogen Powerbomb to Zenk Cryger by H-Bomb. Daisy Cutter Powerbomb to Peta from PETA by Daisy Cutter-Bomb. Atomic Powerbomb to GreenPete…Hydrogen Powerbomb to James Idahola…Daisy Cutter Powerbomb to the Young Jerks’s Anna.

Meanwhile, the American Patriots and Progressive Alliance brawled four on four with no side gaining any appreciable advantage. After a while the ring was finally cleared for the main event.

MAIN EVENT/NON-TITLE MATCH: PCW Champion ‘The Prairie Populist’ William Daniels Bryan (Les Miserables) defeated Big Oil w/Texas Tex-after all the drama, the PCW champion sent the crowd home happy with a victory over Big Oil.

[‘Trumpet Concerto No. 2 in D major – 3 Allegro assai’ begins to play in the background and P-SPAN quickly cuts away to another political event.]