#these intimacy rooms really are everything i could’ve wanted huh

[pwurrz]

i don’t think i’ll ever stop crying about quinei

[mypoisonedvine]

for the sleepover tonight! zemo needs an heir, you need money. you agree to marry him in exchange for birthing a child and divorcing several months after. only you've grown feelings and now you don't want to leave him

um let’s not worry that I made this pure angst/fluff

Adalgisa | feminine

origin: German

meaning: Noble, precious promise

Since the full name didn’t exactly roll off the tongue, you usually called her Addy; sometimes Gigi because it made her giggle.

You hoped she would never know how true her name’s meaning really was, that she was the result of a contractual agreement between you and her father.  By now you had the contract memorized, since you read it every time you couldn’t sleep: In essence, it said that you and Helmut could divorce as soon as the child was done breastfeeding and that you would get ample visitation to go with your handsome compensation.

But as the time approached, you couldn’t imagine leaving her now; that much was clear as you looked down at where she’d fallen asleep on your chest.  You stroked your fingers over her curls, admiring the innocence of her peaceful expression.  And then you looked at your husband sleeping beside you, his arm limply draped over both of you... and you couldn’t imagine leaving him, either.  That was the part you didn’t expect.

Of course you’d known that there was a decent chance this whole thing would backfire, but your plan in that case was just to flee with the child and raise her without knowledge of her birthright.  But, that was all assuming that the reason it would backfire would be too much love for the kid, and/or the Baron being exactly as controlling and cold as he seemed at first.  After all, who needs a contract to have a child?

The last three years with him brought so much more clarity than you could’ve imagined.  From the beginning he was so gentle with you, more patient than he needed to be, even when he was a bit aloof and so deeply reserved.  You never wanted for anything... well, that’s not totally true.  Every night you wanted his touch, longed for more than what a contract required, and you could never tell if he really had any affection for you if he just wanted to make you comfortable while he did his best to get you pregnant.

When you found out he’d done it after all, you didn’t tell him right away (even though that was in direct violation of the contract).  You weren’t ready for him to stop touching you, you weren’t ready for how he would treat you when intimacy no longer served a purpose.  Of course, your moral compass got the better of you before he could actually take you to bed again; you just couldn’t bring yourself to let him go through with it when you knew it was under false pretenses.

“Wait,” you gasped as he kissed down your neck, pushing his hands away from where they had begun to tenderly spread your legs.

“Is everything alright?” he breathed, pulling back to stare down at you.  “Are you okay?”

“Yes, I-- I’m fine,” you stammered.

“Should I stop?” he pressed, looking a bit conflicted as his gaze scanned your body; clearly he would stop if you said to, but at the same time, his own desperation was apparent.  It was rare for someone normally as collected as him.

“Well, you don’t need to, but you might want to when I tell you...” you trailed off.

“Tell me what?”

You chewed on your lip.  “Helmut... I’m pregnant.”

His eyes went wide and you looked away, guilt burning in your gut.  “How... how long have you...?”

“Just a few days, I should’ve told you as soon as I knew but I was scared--”

“Scared of what?”

Scared that you’d never kiss me again, you immediately thought to yourself. Scared that the last time was the last time-- I would’ve done it different if I had known it was the last time.  I would’ve held you closer, I would’ve loved you harder; I would’ve made sure that even if you were going to throw me once it was all over, that you would never forget me.

“I... don’t know.”

“Darling,” he whispered, “it’s wonderful.  This is wonderful.  You’re so... you’re beautiful.”

He leaned down again to give you a slow kiss, the softest smile pressing against your lips.  You wrapped your arms around his neck, relaxing a bit.

“I can’t believe it,” he mumbled.  “In the best way, I mean.”

His hand ventured down to your belly where he let it rest as he stared in awe.  You both spent a moment in that silence together, and the energy shifted slightly as he looked up at you again.

“Darling...”

“Yes, Helmut?”

“May I make love to you?” he asked, lowering his voice.  The question caught you off-guard, and made a sting of need hit between your legs.  “I know we don’t need to, since you’re already... and I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t want this, but--”

“Yes,” you answered quickly.  “I want you, please.”

I love you, you wanted to say, but he kissed you before you could.

And then the pregnancy... finally that hard shell began to crack as he watched your bump grow.  He became so doting, and not just by kissing and rubbing your belly or talking about the baby; he kissed you, too, and with more love in his eyes than you knew what to do with.  You decided not to let yourself wonder if he loved you back; you could barely admit that you loved him in the first place.

When Addy was born, you realized you’d never known how beautiful family could feel.  But now it was everything to you; now you were this baby’s entire world, and she was yours, and Helmut was absolutely enamored with her.

“Spending some quality time with your baroness, huh?” you chuckled as you walked in on him dancing around to an old record with the baby on his hip.

“Darling, you’re my baroness,” he clarified, and you had not expected the effect those words would have on you.  “She’ll gain the title when she’s older.  For now she’s just my little heiress.”

And now that she was almost two, she was undeniably a daddy’s girl in return.  Not that she didn’t love you, obviously, but she was so spoiled by him.  It was sort of a rarity that she was sleeping on you tonight and not him; in fact, it was normally him that let her into your bed when she was meant to be sleeping in her nursery.

Tears welled in your eyes as you realized that you absolutely could not leave.  Maybe you could survive a divorce from the man you were secretly in love with, but you couldn’t move out.  You couldn’t be away from her, from this.  It wasn’t just a man and a woman and a child.  It wasn’t just a Baron and his contractually-obligated wife and their means-to-an-end child.

The three of you were the Zemo family now.  And you loved being a part of it so much.

“Helmut,” you whispered, seeing him jolt from his sleep.

“Is everything okay?” he asked before he was even completely awake.  “Are you safe?”

“Yes, I’m fine,” you laughed softly.  “I was just wondering if I should take her to her room.”

“I’ll do it,” he offered, starting to sit up.  “You don’t have the finesse it takes to carry her without waking her up.”

You frowned, but didn’t protest because you knew he was right.  He carefully lifted her sleeping body off of you and leaned her onto his shoulder as he carried her out and down the hall.  You waited in darkness and silence for his return, imagining what you might say when he came back.

I love you.

I want to get out of the contract.

I think we should stay married.

All worthy contenders, but when he came back to bed empty-handed, none of them seemed to come out of your mouth even when you opened it to speak.

“Goodnight, darling,” he whispered, turning away as he pulled the blankets up over himself.

I love you, you wanted to say it so much, it was so fucking close to your lips but you came up silent.  I love you I love you I love you.  “Goodnight,” you heard yourself say instead.

Maybe you’d find the courage to tell him tomorrow, before it was too late.  But then again, that was the last thought you’d had every night for the past year.

[sorry-i-ship-drarry]

Hi, i really like your drabbles!

Will you please write something where Harry and Draco are flatmates and friends and one day they were hanging out watching a movie and laughing and having fun and out of the blue Harry says Can i kiss you and then they kiss and Harry gets emotional because he is overwhelmed and draco falls for him more. ❤

Thank you 😊

40. Just keep swimming

I will be combining this request with next of my prompt - Patting others back. Hope you like this and thank you so much | after a bad day at work, as a friend, Harry tries to cheer Draco up by a movie night | fluff | domestic |

Fan art taken down because of confidentiality.

Credits - @upthehillart

" Draco is that you ?" Harry called out as he turned off the stove, walking out to see who walked into the flat.

" yeah " he sighs.

" ooh, that sounds terrible. Bad day at work huh ?" Harry asked as he took off the apron and threw it in the kitchen

" the most terrible day ever. It was all a mess, this new potioneer just fucked up each and every single of the potion claiming he was disturbed because of some family problem and I couldn't even yell at him because of that, then midway the potion making for st. Mungo's, my assistant fainted, basically spilling all of the potion we had been brewing for a week and above all my boss yelled at me for something I didn't even do and i- just can't . I'm done with the day " Draco looked he could almost cry.

" oh dear. That's bad " Harry sympathetically said as he walked upto Draco and gave him a friendly hug.

" i know the perfect remedy to fix your day " Harry suggested

" please, anything " Draco sighed taking off his coat and hanging it next to the door.

" go take a shower then, you stink of something really awful, like rotten pumpkin juice-"

" must be one of the potions " Draco rolled his eyes

" okay nevermind. Go. Take a shower. Food is done and I'll take care of the rest, yeah ?" Harry asked as he walked behind Draco and pushed him forward to walk to the bathroom.

" you're a great friend Harry " Draco sighed.

" I know I am. Now go " Harry patted Draco's back almost reaching the bathroom.

" whenever you're done " and with that Harry walked back into the kitchen, sighing to himself. This was again a lost chance.

" great friend " Harry scoffed to himself, disappointed. Shaking his head, he set his priorities to fixing his flatmate / best friend's mood right.

Done everything perfectly right, Harry chose the movie to watch, set the lightings to low, pizza on table, red wine for the mood and fluffy Blankets and of course pillows.

And woof.

" how could I forget you, snuffles " Harry scratched the dogs neck playfully " you're the perfect mood twister, now aren't you, aren't you "

" he definitely is " Draco walked in still looking tired..

" Jesus, even Voldemort would look better than you right now, not to mention without a nose "

" ha ha ha, very funny potter " Draco rolled his eyes and plopped onto the couch. Snuffles joining him on the sofa.

" I can't believe this dog. I gave him a name, I was the one who bought him, I take him to the vets, for walks, and even buy his favourite food and yet he loves you more than me " Harry whined as he plopped next to Draco watching him kiss the top of dogs head.

" well harry I am sort of irresistible" Draco smirked

" sod off malfoy " Harry rolled his eyes, shaking his head at the amusing joke.

" so what are we watching ?" He finally asked as snuffles got more comfortable into his lap.

" finding Nemo" Harry replied

" perfect " Draco relaxed further into the couch and harry turned on the movie.

" you don't wanna talk about it though ?" Harry asked

" This is much better. I'd rather not boil my blood by reciting again how shit my day was. Thanks for this by the way, you always know what to do " Draco gave Harry a smile , crossing his legs over the sofa, sitting more comfortably.

Passing the pizza, the wine, not to forget the spaghetti Harry made, Draco was full and was more comfortably invested into the movie, while harry was more invested in peaking glances at Draco watching the movie.

" can I lay on your lap ?" Draco suddenly asked.

With his heart beating a little louder and suddenly very much awareness of tongue in his mouth and the socks in his feets, he whispered a " yes "

And Draco got comfortable in Harry's lap, snuffles falling asleep through the movie over Draco's torso.

" i love this turtles dude part, They're much more cooler than anyone we know and the way they just say dude, gosh, coolest thing ever "

" aren't they ?" Harry chuckled as he lightly untangled Draco's soft hair with his calloused fingers

"okay tell me, if I had to one character from this movie who would I be ?" Draco asked suddenly looking up at from his lap.

" hm, that's a tricky one " Harry pouted thinking about the answer for a minute or two " i think you're the Nigel, the pelican "

" hey " Draco swatted Harry on his chest laughing " I don't have a big mouth "

" are you sure ? Have you seen yourself when you eat the brownies your mom sends " Harry laughed softly

Draco gasped " they're really good, okay. You don't underestimate them. You should try them by the way "

" well my dearest darling friend, I'd try if you'd leave me some, big mouth Nigel " Harry laughed but was immediately attacked by a pillow at his face.

" you're mean. I just had a terrible day " despite that fact, he couldn't resist laughing with Harry.

"oh sod off. You're not going to get my pity " Harry scoffed, still grinning at Draco, adjusting his spectacles.

" you're really an asshole " Draco rolled his eyes, glimpsing at the motioning movie.

" and yet you keep me around. You're the one who have Stockholm syndrome " Harry covered his face, and as anticipated he was smacked by a pillow in the face "ouch -"

" what, did I hit you too hard ?" Draco rose a few inches immediately

Harry's expression changed from being fake injured to snickering.

" I can't believe you -"

" always works " Harry laughed

" you- I can't believe you use that trick " Draco rolled off his eyes collapsing back into his lap

" and yet you fall for it everytime " Harry chuckled

" you know what, one of these days you're actually going to be hurt and I won't give a damn about you" Draco fake sneered at him

" oh is that so ?" Harry cooed in a baby voice, softly pinching Draco's cheek

" Harry- don't- "

" aww, you're angry " Harry continued in the baby voice

" don't- I said stop. Stop with the voice, it's annoying " draco desperately tried to swat Harry's hands away from his face, but he couldn't possibly entirely deny that he didn't like it.

" aww, Little pelican is angry " Harry pouted

" hey- I'm not little- you idiot " Draco smacked Harry with a pillow again, repeatedly almost sitting up in that process and getting through Harry defenseless ways of trying to protect himself from it, and breaking into a fit of laughter.

" okay- okay stop " Harry cackled

" say I'm not a pellican -"

" but you're the one who asked "

" well you could've said I'm a Nemo or Marlin. He's cute"

" oh yeah, you probably are, little and desperately trying to prove yourself "

" okay- that - was -rude " Draco smacked him at every word until Harry grabbed hold of the pillow and threw it across the room, immediately tickling Draco.

"Merlins fuck- gah- stop- agh " and he took the fall to the ground gracefully, taking Harry down with him.

Harry looked at Draco only for a brief from top before they both started laughing to death. The movie only served as a mere background noise to their laughs and their bodies almost pressed against each other.

" you had to take me down with you " Harry calmed down only a little staring down at Draco

" I never take the fall alone Harry, you knew that about me when you first became friends with me " Draco grinned. Harry shook his head at the slight truth in the absurdity. He looked down at Draco, laying there defenseless with the sweetest grin over his face, his fringes casually very perfectly sprawled over his forehead, his eyes shining with the dim light and the happiness that had Found a way into him. It was impossible to look at draco underneath him and not feel lovestruck.

" you know what, you're definitely a dory " Draco chuckled

" oh I am now " Harry widened his eyes in fun surprise

" oh yes, completely imbecile "

" not to forget you've forgotten almost everyone of my boyfriend's name everytime we meet. You would call them anything but their na-"

" Can I kiss you ?" The words were out before he could've rolled his tounge to stop.

Draco looked at him in complete shock which didn't help Harry currently at all. His eyebrows shot up through his fringes in extreme shock of the sudden question. The bowl of chips next to his hands crashed onto the ground and suddenly the shark from finding Nemo seemed much smaller..

" you- you want-"

" never mind. It was just a stupid question. It was- a - just pure curiousity. It doesn't matter. We sho- should just finish the movie and lets just pretend I never asked -"

" yes-"

" this- wait what ?"

" I said yes, I'd like that " Draco's lips curled into a little smile.

Shocked but with a good surprise Harry returned the smile and with consent leaned down to kiss draco softly over the lips. They could hear the soft noises from the TV but harry was clearly more focused on Draco's hands going up his back and the softness of lips pressed against his, the tenderness in the kiss and the lopsided smile Draco had held. Draco was no stranger to that as well, he too was focused on Harry's hands going under his shirt, not in a furious way but a soft gesture to find more intimacy and for someone who looked they would kiss roughly, Harry worked his lips like it was a master plan he had always been working on if ever given the opportunity to enunciate. They were lost for seconds, minutes, hours maybe but it felt like forever to share that brisk intimate kiss. Neither of them had even realised they were out of breath until they had started heaving and only the other one noticed and stopped kissing at once.

Harry smiled down at Draco, until the sudden realisation hit him that they were still on the ground.

" wanna get back on the sofa or is floor too comfortable for you my majesty "

" you'll never change, will you ?" Draco shook his head as he took Harry's hand and got back up on the sofa and landing in his lap once again but this time his eyes were Only focused on Harry. Who strangely enough was looking blankly at the TV with-

" Harry, are you crying ?" Draco rose up a little bit

" uh, no. The movie-"

" we just kissed and you care about the movie-"

" no, it's not like that-"

" seems like it-"

" oh calm down you idiot. I just- I got a wee bit emotional" Harry sighed

" why ?"

" because I finally kissed you. Do you even realize how much courage it took to even ask you that. I'm overwhelmed that you Returned-"

" your feelings ? Harry, I cannot express you enough how much I like you. All the past relationships- I understand not a good point here but listen- they never worked because they're not you. I've always liked you Harry, well pretty much always "

" really ?"

" of course. I'd been pining on you for ages. It's good to know you finally feel the same "

" I- I've been pining for long too. I mean I may have never told you but-"

" you stalked me in 6th year all year long and desperately tried to cross paths with me every chance you got in 8th year. Yeah, I bet even snuffles knows about that "

" oh "

Draco smiled softly, cupping harry's face " hey, I like you and you're worth it. You were always worth the wait, even if you still want to wait. My feelings would probably never change for you Harry. It's pretty darn hard to run away from you " Draco shrugged

" well-"

" I like you harry, I do " Draco reassured again knowing Harry was feeling overwhelmed and insecure.

" I like you too Draco " Harry finally gave Draco a smile before leaning down to kiss him again, with a small smile curving at the corner of his lips.

And when they broke off, Harry and Draco once again became invested into the movie, the difference being, they both couldn't wait for more tomorrow's to come and Draco couldn't help but fall deeper for Harry.

But then maybe, Harry was his dory If Draco was a marlin or even if he was Nemo, Harry would make sure to go above and beyond just for him and that was enough to keep Draco swimming in his love for him.

Requests open

Day - 39- cuddle me in | Day 41- quidditch field victories

[dumdumsun]

Forever and Never

A/N: Thank you so much for taking the time to read this series ❤️ I’ve had so much fun writing this and am very proud of and excited for it, I can’t wait to see how people react to this. Um I know there are plenty of warnings for a first chapter, but I promise it’s not as depressing as it sounds. It’s just that this story can deal with heavy stuff sometimes, so I just wanna let you know that. Anyways, hope you enjoy!

Warnings: mentions of marijuana, death, sexual assault and mental illness

Word Count: 3194

—————————————

One: Hi, My Name Is

“So, what was your time in Pennsylvania like?”

“Uh… I’d have to say it was the best… and worst time of my life.”

“Best and worst, huh? Would you like to elaborate?”

“Well, I, uh… I mean, I don’t really know how to, like… explain it. It’s a lot. I don’t even know where to begin… Or how I would even word it or anything.”

“Well, you told me you like television and movies, right? You know those shows and movies where the main character tells the plot as, like, their life story? Maybe you could try that.”

“You aren’t… You aren’t serious, are you?”

“You’ll know when I’m joking, trust me.”

“Oh… Okay, then. Well, um…”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hi? My name is… (Y/N)? This is my life story, I guess.

So, if we’re going to talk about my life in Pennsylvania, we’re going to have to start with my life in Kansas, first. I had two loving parents that soon turned into one at the too-young age of nine years, when my mom died. I remember her as one of the sweetest people I’ve ever known. She had this way about her that was so carefree, yet she gave a shit about everything. You could never pin a thought to her because she never let you in on what was bouncing around in her head. She was stubborn and patient and lively. I miss her so much. I don’t usually think about her unless it’s a particularly hectic day, which I then resort to talking to the ring I wear on my left pinky finger at all times. Wasn’t anything special, just some cheap ring with a little emerald inside she found at a thrift store. It used to be hers and she’d wear it on the exact same finger. My dad said she’d want me to have it.

My dad is my favorite person. He isn’t the most… present, though. His mind is never set in one place, always racing with hundreds of unrelated thoughts. It’s why when you finally drag him back into reality, he can’t repeat a single sentence spoken to him. Regardless, he’s all I had for a long time. I never really learned what he does for a living, but I just know that it forces him to leave town sometimes. Well, more like all the time. Before my mom died, it was easy for him to leave for weeks on end, but when he became my only guardian, he didn’t really know what to do with me. It was like he completely forgot how to take care of a child, his child. When I turned twelve, that was when he started travelling again. I would then be home by myself for a month to eight weeks. In these times, I had no choice but to learn to cook for myself, go grocery shopping and housekeep. I became pretty independent at a young age. It wasn’t like Dad left me totally alone, though. He would call every two or three days and he sent me two hundred dollars every two weeks. Like I said, I don’t know what my dad did, but he was definitely getting paid. At the end of eighth grade, Dad had a particularly long trip to go on, so he sent me to Pennsylvania, where his sister lived.

Pennsylvania was partially the best part of my life because of my family. My Aunt Pam was like a second mother to me. She was never able to have another child after my cousin Jacob and she’s always wanted a daughter of her own, so that’s what I was to her. The daughter she could never have. I’d often find her staring at me with a bittersweet smile on her face, watching my every move with a sense of pride, but when I’d ask her what was wrong she’d only brush it off as her admiring me. My Uncle David didn’t necessarily view me as a daughter, but he certainly treated me like one. When he wanted to spend time with Jacob, he included me as well. We’d usually go on drives around the town, but I always fell asleep to the soft and serene music that filled the car from the radio. On the weekends, we would head down by the lake and spend hours learning to fish.

I hated it, but I couldn’t complain. It gave me a sense of certainty to live with a father figure who didn’t leave me alone every two or three months.

Jacob was like a brother to me. He’s a year older than me, which, to him, meant that he had to protect me at all costs. I always assumed it was because he always wanted a younger sibling, and I was the closest he was ever going to get to that. I always felt as though I’d never be able to equal Jacob on an intellectual level because he practically had the IQ of Albert Einstein himself. I felt inferior to him until I found out how much of a joy he really was. On the weekends, he would beg me to accompany him in a movie marathon. I learned that Jacob was a huge fan of Tim Burton (his favorite was Beetlejuice). He’s the only cousin I’ve ever known. Mom and Dad didn’t like each other’s families, so I never met anyone besides this little family. Moving in with them meant that they’d have this huge burden on them.

Yes, I almost forgot to mention that I struggle with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, or OCD. It just means that my mind is flooded with these crazy and unnecessary thoughts and so my behavior is affected by them. For example, if I were to blink and felt I put more pressure on my left eye than my right, I would have to repeatedly wink with my right eye until they felt balanced. Sometimes I can’t enter a room until I have inhaled eight times. If I scratch an itch on my left knee, I have to scratch the right one in the exact same place. At the sink, even if I don’t use both knobs, I have to hold both in my hands. And when I turn them off, I often have to check about four times before I am certain they’re turned off all the way. I know, it sounds tiring. Just imagine being on my end, having it be a part of who you are. I can’t do anything to stop it, I wish I could. I was always afraid to make friends because of this. If I couldn’t be balanced, I’d freeze, and I mean actually stop whatever I’m doing and stand still, until my body felt as if I were balanced once again. Who wouldn’t make fun of me for this?

Apparently, no one gave a shit about it. After moving to Pennsylvania, I made quite a name for myself at school. Literally. My name was Zip. I have no fucking clue how that ridiculous name came to be, but that’s what I went by day after day. One could say I was considered popular, but it wasn’t like I actually spoke to anyone. When it came to extracurriculars, I only participated in theatre. I never was part of the cast, just the stage manager. Secretly, I wanted so badly to audition and be a part of the magic they created on that stage. Not to boast or anything, but I had the talent and potential to be a starring role. But I could never bring myself to break out of my shell. Nonetheless, being stage manager still got me quite the attention. Everyone was always so nice to me, so I felt a little bad for not considering any of them as friends. That was until I met Dina.

Dina was new to our school sophomore year. She had this sort of light to her that attracted the pesky moths that were our dull and boring school body. We had the same social status in school. People liked our personalities, so we were well-liked and accepted without doing much to prove ourselves worthy. She was sweet and compassionate and so fun. I didn’t mean to become her friend, but she was so welcoming, despite being the newcomer. We became close friends, but not best friends. We already had people filling those roles.

Dina’s best friend was Sydney Novak. Sydney moved to Brownsville around the same time as Dina, so the two became best friends quickly, but Sydney wasn’t very popular at all. She was shy and introverted, but I thought she was nice enough. I liked her and thought she was a pretty cool person. We weren’t necessarily friends, we were just well acquainted simply because we were both close with Dina. The transitive property, if you would. I just wish we could’ve talked more, our relationship was pretty much nonexistent.

Speaking of nonexistent relationships, let’s talk about Richard Berry. I honestly don’t want to even think about him, but he played a role in my life that was too vital to just offhandedly mention. For some odd reason, Ricky Berry was absolutely in love with me. It was so obvious to everyone except for me. Sophomore year, he expressed his love through the most arrogant and cheesiest of pick-up lines and compliments. I wasn’t so easily won over, if you could guess. I tried being good friends with him, but he’d always fuck it up when he tried to initiate intimacy. I didn’t want to hold hands with him in the halls or receive “friendly” cheek kisses. I’m not what you would call affectionate, especially towards people I’m not close to. It’s just never been comfortable for me. Junior year, everyone around me was buzzing with excitement when they heard Ricky was going to ask me to be his girlfriend. The cheerleaders, who got to know him through his high school football career, constantly pestered me with reasons as to why I would be so lucky to date The Richard Berry. Granted, he became less of a dick junior year, so I thought, Why not?, and accepted. Being in a relationship with Ricky was the most one-sided… anything I had ever been a part of. He was undeniably enamored with me, but I couldn’t find it in myself to reciprocate those feelings. He would show me off to his family and friends like a trophy, but if someone asked me if I had a boyfriend I’d go, “I mean, yeah. I guess”, so not a very healthy relationship. It also didn’t help that Ricky knew nothing about boundaries.

One night, we were in his bedroom, studying for a science test. Ricky wasn’t focused at all and kept trying to kiss and cuddle with me. I let him for awhile, but then he took my book from me and set it on the ground beside his bed. He suggested we have sex right then and there. Now, I was never a prude and definitely didn’t wait to have sex for the first time, but I never wanted Ricky to be my first. He hadn’t earned enough of my trust to even touch me suggestively. So, of course I refused. Ricky only took that as me teasing him, so he advanced, nearly forcing himself on me. Using all my might, I shoved him off of the bed. He stood to his feet, utterly confused, but I only gathered my things and left his house. He tried following after me, but I ignored him until he turned and went back into his home. The next day at school, he was holding me and kissing me and showing me off to everyone like he always did. As if nothing happened between us the night before. It was difficult to do, since he was so inconsiderate, but I managed to break up with him. He tried to deny that we were Splitsville for about a week, but everyone caught wind of our break-up. Once everyone knew about it, it became true for him. I never really felt comfortable with being intimate or open with guys after that.

Besides with Stanley Barber, of course. Stan was my best friend in the entire world. I told only my deepest, darkest secrets to him. And he told me his. The only things we really had in common were our lack of mothers and our hideous bacne. Stan lived a few houses down and was eager to get to know me a week after I moved in. I’d never met anyone in my life like Stan. He was so awkward, but loveable. I don’t know, I guess he reminded me of my mom. The way he didn’t care, but he so clearly did. Whenever I wanted to talk about something that was difficult to voice, we’d smoke to ease the tension. Of course, this wasn’t how we always communicated. Despite his nervous stuttering, he was easy to open up to. Stan provided a sort of security in my life. He was never going to leave me and that put me at ease when hanging out with him, which we did regularly. I don’t know when exactly I developed a crush on him, but I never wanted it to surface in our bond. He was to never know. It was just a stupid crush, right? He was a guy who wasn’t family and was so unbelievably caring towards me. It was bound to happen, but that didn’t mean he had to be aware of it. Though, it was a little hard to keep such a secret when we’d both made out twice already. The first time was while I was dating Ricky, the kiss was very awkward and ended after about a minute and a half. The second kiss was just half a week after my breakup. That time, we’d both known what we were doing. And I may be a little biased, but you couldn’t have even thought to fake the passion in that makeout session. We never talked about either of those kisses and remained friends both times. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t bother me that we didn’t become anything more afterwards. It was for the best, though, because two weeks before spring break, my dad returned from his job in Georgia and moved me to Kansas again. The move was so abrupt that I didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye to anyone besides my family.

My life in Kansas for the second time was something I’d never want to experience ever again. Since it was a little late in the year, I finished junior year online. For some unexplained reason, my dad had us get new phones and new numbers, so I lost all contact with my friends. I had no one to talk to and it wasn’t like my dad paid much attention to me. I remember spending every waking moment with him when I was younger, talking or playing games or watching television. It used to be so fun being his daughter, but when we moved back to Kansas, I just felt like this huge burden in his life. Our relationship was strained and he clearly had other priorities in his life. Like whatever he left back in Georgia. I’d see his phone ring and the same number from that state would pop up before he’d leave the room and privately talk with whoever. It wasn’t the secrecy that was off-putting to me, it was the fact that it was so much more important to him. Once again, I was ignored by the one person in my life I wanted to spend the most time with. So, you can imagine the joy I felt when Dad had to go back to Georgia for work. I had been attending public school for my senior year and left not even a full month in. It didn’t bother me, I had no friends and nothing to leave behind. Mid-September was when I moved back to Brownsville with Aunt Pam. Everyone accepted me right back in. Especially my classmates. As I walked the halls I heard whispers like,

“Oh, my god, is that Zip?”

“Zip’s back! Where’d she even go?”

“I thought she died.”

The only person I really wanted to notice me was Stan. I missed him so much, I even got into his favorite band to have something to remember him by. I remember the day I got back to my aunt’s house. Jacob had picked me up from the airport and was driving me to the house. He was attending community college, but was still living with his parents. As we drove, he tapped his index fingers rhythmically to the shitty pop music that played on the radio. “So, what are you excited about for senior year?”

“Not much, I just missed Dina and Stan. Theatre, too. I wonder how they’ve been doing without me.” I chuckled. Jacob huffed in amusement.

“But you didn’t miss Ricky?”

“Fuck, Jake, you know I didn’t miss him for a second.” I frowned, waving my hand in dismissal. My cousin tauntingly laughed at me. Had he actually known about what happened between Ricky and I, he wouldn’t have teased me. In fact, Ricky wouldn’t even be alive that day if Jacob found out. No one knew about the incident, not even Stan.

Pulling up in front of the house, we got out of the car and headed to the trunk to pull out my bags. I tried carrying them in, but Jacob insisted that he do all the heavy lifting and simply asked me to carry my backpack and close the trunk. I did what little I was asked of and headed to the front door to greet my aunt and uncle inside, but stopped. In the corner of my eye, I saw movement from the Barber residence. Turning, my eyes locked on Stanley, who was frozen beside his car. He was wearing his work uniform and staring at me with the most bewildered expression on his face. It was like he thought himself to be hallucinating my existence. Smiling, I simply waved at him before walking back inside. When he got home from work that night, he headed over to my house and knocked on the door. I answered with a grin on my face. “Stan!”

“If it isn’t the famous Zip, showing back up in my life.”

“Ugh, do not call me that.” I rolled my eyes playfully before bringing him into a hug. He wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his chin at the top of my head. I would’ve stayed there all night if I could’ve. When Stanley pulled away, my heart hollowed and a pit formed within my stomach. I felt unfinished, unbalanced. And I hate imbalance. He asked if I wanted to hang out and I accepted his offer. All we did was lay on his floor, listen to music and get high, but in that moment, that’s all I needed.

Bloodwitch, a joint, and Stan laying by my side.

—————————————

Taglist: @melinda-hargreeves @sapphicsyn @stqnley @lonely-kermit

[moth-song-archives]

The Insatiable Flow of Time (1/8)

I remembered that I can make posts here too huh! Anyways, I wrote a post-MAG200 fic <3

I’ll reblog it again with the link to ao3 if you’d prefer reading it there :D

Rating: Teens and Up Archive Warnings: Choose Not To Use Categories: F/F Relationships: Georgie/Melanie, Georgie & Jon, Jonmartin (mentioned) Characters: Georgie Barker, Melanie King, Jonathan Sims, the Admiral, Basira Hussain (mentioned), Rosie Zampano (mentioned), Martin Blackwood (mentioned)

Additional tags: Diary/Journal × post mag200 × Post-Canon × Canon Compliant × Rated for swearing and me doing my best to write a fitting epilogue for my most fave story of all time × Bittersweet × Hurt/Comfort × Grief/Mourning × Gentle-Sad-Soft × Fluff × Non-Sexual Intimacy × Tenderness × Generally Hopeful Ending × Ambiguous/Open Ending × Catharsis × You know how TMA is a tragedy? ... yeah × Hope Punk × dealing with the fallout of surviving a literal apocalypse × Moving on and letting go × Trans Georgie Barker × Nonbinary Melanie King × Melanie uses any pronouns but needs to (re)discover this first × and is then mainly referred to with they/them pronouns for diary-simplicity × Melanie is ace in my heart ♡ × Jon is also enby but it only gets referred to in passing × Georgie has a Type™ × Character Study × i love them all so much × Nonbinary aspec author × it's very hope punk and somft BUT ALSO VERY SAD × in like a cathartic way × because i like causing pain :') × pre-written and updates every 2-3 days

I think I might use it to… rediscover myself. That’s what I liked about journaling in the first place, I think. Getting to think about things outside of my own head, putting it out there so I could move on? Maybe it’s time to return to old coping mechanisms and try again. Even if I haven’t really changed. Even if I should’ve changed. Right?

As the world tries to piece itself back together, Georgie grapples with her past, her present, and her future by keeping a diary. She also keeps having this strange, recurring dream that involves Jon. Post MAG200.

Finished at ~12k, will upload over the next couple of days <3

Day 3 - Evening

Melanie is sleeping. Basira is also sleeping, on the sofa in the living-room. She doesn’t really know what to do with herself, these days, so for now she’s staying with us.

I am not sleeping. I’m so far beyond tired that I can’t sleep anymore. It’s been... how long? More than a day, certainly. I’m at the kitchen table and the night outside is darker than any I’ve ever seen. There are no street lights and a million more stars than I could’ve ever imagined. I wish Melanie could see them too :(

Back before everything in my life went wrong, I used to be really good at this. I think I got my first diary when I was... seven, maybe eight? I used to be obsessed with it. I guess I stopped writing in college, after the incident, because it felt... wrong? Like I was lying to myself, trying to fabricate emotions that just weren’t there, keeping up with things that no longer seemed important or note-worthy. Mainly, I couldn’t make myself care about anyone or anything anymore.

I think I want to find that person again, now that it’s over. Try and… move on? And Melanie encouraged me :) I guess that’s the main reason. I found this notebook in one of the domains when we were rescuing people. I don’t know what I originally wanted to do with it, but I did end up forgetting about it until I went through my bag again today. It smells like fire and is a bit singed in places, but I kind of like that? I think I might use it to… rediscover myself. ...that sounds very pretentious, but this is just for me, so...

And I like that it’s just cheap paper scribbled on with a shitty biro. Maybe I’ll just burn it when all the thoughts are on the paper instead of in my head. When I can sleep again. And the prize for the most dramatic way of closure goes to Georgie Barker! But yeah. That’s what I liked about journaling in the first place, I think. Getting to think about things outside of my own head, putting it out there so I could move on? Maybe it’s time to return to old coping mechanisms and try again. Even if I haven’t really changed. Even if I should’ve changed. Right?

But I don’t feel any different. Shouldn’t I feel different, now that they’re gone? The entities, I mean, though Jon and Martin seem to be gone, too.

I keep remembering Martin’s expression when he told us to go early, how upset he was.

Honestly, I can’t say I’m surprised. As long as I’ve known Jon, he’s always done what he thought best. It used to drive me up the walls, but I also admired it, I think? I never would’ve told him that, but… Well. He’s gone now.

It’s over, all of it.

And I still can’t sleep.

And Melanie is still blind, and I still feel empty, and my fear still hasn’t come back. Everyone who died is still dead, and the trauma is still there. There were angry mobs in the streets, and people got killed.

I can’t quite believe that Jon and Martin went with them. I can’t believe they left us behind to explain the entire mess.

 We’re back in our old flat. It’s so weird to be back home. Everything looks the same, as though no time passed at all. Nobody knows what date it is. How long were we caught in there?

Outside, it feels like spring. There are birds everywhere, singing their hearts out. Sounds like more birds than there used to be, too. The trees are leafless and dead-looking, but Basira pointed out that they’re getting there... and it feels like spring.

I haven’t slept properly in 3 days because the questions keep me awake. It’s not that I’m worrying, really, just… thinking? I think I could sleep better if the worry had come back, but it hasn’t.

As far as we can tell, all modern devices are broken, too. Computers and phones and such, digital cameras, generators... we don’t even know what the rest of the world looks like. I hadn’t realised how much gets controlled by computers these days, we don’t even have central heating or water access in our flat. Rumours and news are spreading person-to-person, like in the Olden Days. We only have emergency systems that were installed in case of nation-wide blackout. I guess I’m glad we don’t actually have a blackout, we just need to get the computers back to work. (If I understood it correctly.)

Melanie thinks it’ll all come back to life in a few more days. I certainly hope so. I also hope I’ll stop feeling like this. Or rather, not feeling like anything. It’s so strange. Like in the first days after the incident, when I just felt numb?

They’re gone! I want to feel like a person again! What if I never get myself back?

 They’re actually gone.

 What will we do with our lives now? Basira isn’t the only one who feels uprooted. I think the whole world feels like that right now.

I hope my computer comes back soon. I miss music, and making things. My photos, all those memories.

I don’t want to lose all of that. I want to start fresh, but not without records of the past.

…I’ve had a lot of time to think about that, specifically. Records, and futures.

What the Ghost is done, right? There’s no fun in creepy ghost stories if you’ve been through an actual, living nightmare.

I think I want to start new with that, too. When everything works again, that is.

New world, new future, new podcast. I like that. I think. Make a record of what happened through eyewitness accounts? Or is that too similar to the Statements… then again, it’ll be more like interviews. And I think we shouldn’t forget.

We owe them that much.

I’ll have to talk it over with Melanie tomorrow. Maybe.

We’ll see.

God, I think maybe… maybe I can actually try and sleep tonight. Writing does seem to help.

 Note to self: thank Laverne for suggesting it. (Also for being there for Melanie. And listening to us. And stopping with that culty nonsense. She’s the only one we found so far, but she actually listened to us. Strange to think that in this world, I have to be grateful for someone not worshipping me for some dumb reason?!)

   Day 4 - Morning

So. Three things.

1) I did manage to fall asleep after all! I’ve always been a bit of an insomniac, especially after the incident, so actually getting some proper rest felt really good.

2) I somehow woke up right as the sun went up! I think I’ve never seen a dawn this beautiful? I watched it from the bedroom window and I’ll definitely describe it to her in detail when she wakes up! The Admiral was sleeping on our pillow, right next to her head, snuggled up against the back of her neck and shoulder... it was so cute. I can’t believe my phone and camera still don’t work! Melanie has that old polaroid camera somewhere but we haven’t found it yet, and I wish my art skills were any better. I did draw a sketch of the two of them though. I’ll cherish it forever, no matter how shitty it is :’)

After everything that happened, the Admiral is still a bit weird around us. He started out really aggressive, calmed down a bit, and now… now he’s weirdly skittish? Meows a lot. Keeps walking around the flat. The only thing that even remotely returns him to how he used to be is tuna. It’s weird.

But seeing him like that, with Melanie? I love him so much.

I think he’ll be okay.

But before I forget, and why I actually got out the diary at this ungodly hour instead of trying to go back to sleep now that the sun is up…

3) I had a really nice dream. And... I don’t even know. I think I want to try and hold onto the feeling? I don’t think I’ve felt that… deeply… in a long while. Maybe the last time was before all this, when we decided to move in together. Before all of this happened.

For a moment, I felt like I was whole again :’)

It didn’t even have Melanie in it, which is very rude tbh. I think Jon was there? The Admiral, too. We were just chilling on the sofa, watching netflix I think... It felt so... mundane??? Casual, somehow??? Like it was normal to feel like that and I just... I want THAT. I want to feel like that again, instead of this weird… blank nothingness? I want that all the time, not just when I’m riding a high or feeling so terrible that it pierces through.

I don’t know if that makes sense but this is just for me anyway so I suppose it doesn’t have to.

 I think I should feel bad about Jon being gone, but I still don’t even feel relief at it being over. Just this vague numbness.

I hate it so much, except I don’t, actually, I just know that I should?

Melanie keeps saying that I need a therapist but if we’re being honest here, I guess I need one the least? The whole goddamn world needs therapy right now. Including the therapists. And I’ve been dealing with this for a long time now.

I guess I keep hoping it’ll just go away somehow.

 Anyways. Enough introspection, I’m going back to bed. I hope I don’t wake them! :)

  Day 4 - Evening

 It’s night now, the sun went down hours ago. We have a bunch of candles, but I’m trying to use them sparingly, so I just have one lit. I put a glass of water next to the candle so now the light gets magnified a bit more. It’s a weird atmosphere, but I kinda like it? Feels… cozy! :)

I’m still not over how everything looks the same, but nothing works like it did before, and there’s this… burden? This collective trauma everyone went through. It feels so surreal. So many things are still broken… it’s like we woke from a collective nightmare, but pieces of it still remain, floating around.

And we just sent it away with the tapes. I really hope those other worlds are doing better than us, but what else could we have done? I… try not to think about it. I know I should, but I still can’t really bring myself to care, or even feel overly guilty for that? …

 Melanie fell asleep with her head in my lap half an hour ago. I was reading to her. She says she loves the sound of my voice, so I’ve started doing that in the evenings. (I still love that we had separate crushes from a distance on each other for ages because of youtube and WTG. We’ve been talking about that a lot, too.)

She still has nightmares, but apparently she’s also been having good dreams, and she looks so peaceful right now. The last few days have been a lot, but in comparison to before, and even before then…

It’s over. We made it out. We get to have a future together. I still can’t quite believe it. :)

 I guess I’m writing again (despite already having done so in the morning) because it somehow helped yesterday and I’m hoping to replicate that. And I have a lot to think about. It’s been a long day.

Basira is still out there, helping out where she can. I think she feels guilty. Melanie says she doesn’t because there was no other choice, but I know her, and I know that she’s lying.

There’s always another choice. We just say that to make it easier to bear.

I hope she knows she can come talk to me when she feels ready to tackle it.

I hope I ever feel able to tackle it myself. No. I will talk to her when I’m ready.

We did talk a bit about things, of course. Melanie doesn’t really remember her dreams, most of the time, but apparently she’s been alternating between horrifying nightmares and a really nice, recurring one that sometimes happens after the nightmares. She doesn’t really remember much of it, but she mentioned it after I told her about the Jon dream. Not what it was about, just… in general.

From the way she talked about it, I think her dad might have been in it? I’m actually not sure, but the way she smiled…

She has that little smile on her lips again, even now, dreaming. The soft one she gets when she talks about good things. About him.

About me.

(I still can’t believe she chose me. How impossibly lucky? How did I ever deserve her? But then, it’s not about that, is it? She is mine, and I am hers, and… life will be good. I know it will be.)

 She’s been smiling a lot more, these past few days.

[astraeagreengrass]

Blue

The Blue Henley™ and that’s it.

Word Count: 1.567

Warnings: Short and sweet. Mentions of sexy times (no actual sexy times though). English is not my first language, so I apologize in advance for any mistakes.

A/N: Did I just write something inspired by The Blue Henley™? You bet I did! This is my submission to @jalapenobarnes writing challenge. My prompt was “Basorexia - the overwhelming desire to kiss”. Thank you Saran for hosting this challenge and allowing me to participate!

Disclaimer: I don’t own Bucky Barnes. Unfortunately he is a fictional character and therefore is property of Marvel Comics and Marvel Studios. Sebastian Stan’s face belongs to himself. The plot is my own creation.

My masterlist

He is greeted at the threshold by the voices of John, Paul, George and Ringo. 

The Beatles were new to him - like online shopping and Nespresso machines. Maybe, if he’d gone home after ‘45, he’d have dragged Steve to one of their concerts or seen them at Ed Sullivan’s show. And his grandchildren would gawk at him and tell him how lucky he was to have seen the Beatles together.

Maybe.

He couldn’t help it sometimes - how his mind involuntarily drew intricate scenarios of “what ifs” and possibilities. Bucky supposed it was his curse for having lived so long and so hard. His atonement was the constant back and forth of then and now, dealing with the aftermath of everything he missed.

But at least he didn’t kill John Lennon.

The record player was a gift for his 102nd birthday. It resembled very little the one he had back home - his 1940s home. It was sleek, light and state-of-the-art, with that classic vintage look that people liked their electronics to have even if they were far from vintage. 

You’d been so nervous when you gave it to him you couldn’t even wait for the sun to be high in the sky and your lover to be out of the bed. Nervous hands twisted the duvet as Bucky opened the package, careful not to ruin the glitter wrapping paper. He loved it, even if it took him a while to learn how to use the record player. But, once he did, it made way for your favorite tradition: spring saturdays at the flea market, the one in DUMBO or maybe in Williamsburg, looking for old records.

The Beatles, the Stones, Led Zeppelin, Elvis Presley, The Doors, Michael Jackson, Bruce Springsteen, Marvin Gaye and Queen to more recent acts: Nirvana, Guns and Roses, Pearl Jam, the pop groups from the early 2000’s and performers like Bruno Mars and Beyoncé.

Any decade, any rhythm - Bucky Barnes liked music. And you indulged him in his new-found passion, adding soundtrack to the most unexpected moments of his day and being his partner whenever he fancied a dance.

Like now. He found you in the kitchen counter, hips moving slowly as you chopped carrots for dinner.

“Hold me tight / And tell me I’m the only one / And then I might / Never be theAAAAAH” you yelled, half a scream, half a laugh when Bucky surprised you by tickling your sides.

“Holy shit, Barnes! I have a knife on my hands. I could’ve cut myself!” you exclaimed while Bucky doubled over with laughter. 

You threw the knife on the sink, fake pouting, as Bucky came over to you, laugh forgotten. He was all saunter and swagger now, hands reaching out to hold you hips.

“That would teach you not to make dinner while shaking this ass” as to qualify his point, he landed a sharp smack on your left butt cheek, causing you to jump. 

You narrowed your eyes, snark remark at the tip of your tongue when you noticed it.

Blue.

Light blue. Almost teal, but not quite, evenly spread across the expanse of his chest and arms. Blue like his eyes, like the sky on a summer day, like a perfect Caribbean sea.

Beautiful blue.

“Is that… new?” was all you could muster while your gaze roamed the cotton. Your hands left their resting place on the nape of his neck and slid down, as if they could grasp the magnificent color and cradle it.

“Yeah” Bucky said, confused by your reaction. “I bought it last week.”

Such a simple explanation for such a magnificent happenstance. You could picture him: self-conscious and a little overwhelmed as he browsed some fast-fashion looking for simple pieces that didn’t stand out much. Bucky stuck to the classic blacks, whites and grays. Their simplicity made him feel safe and your boyfriend’s comfort would always come before any fashion trend.

Oftentimes a navy color would make an appearance and the way it complimented his eyes made your heart speed up. But this blue... This blue was different. You couldn’t place what was so special about it – was it the shade? An almost exact match to his irises? Was it the contrast of índigo fabric and golden-black forearms?

Bucky watched with raised eyebrows and a confused frown as the tips of your fingers carefully roamed the expanse of his torso, as if you were touching a valuable art piece instead of a US$ 9.99 henley from H&M.

“You okay, doll?” he asked. 

“Yeah” you gawked. “I’m perfect, actually.”

Bucky liked to think he knew you better than he knew himself – your spontaneity, creativity and enthusiasm over the smallest things. Life with you was never dull: it was a collection of happy moments that pieced his broken soul back together. Bucky believed he was used to the spur-of-the-moment midnight walks or the impromptu dance offs in the kitchen, but apparently he wasn’t.

Not when you grabbed him by the collar of the blue henley and kissed him.

It wasn’t a gentle kiss, like the sweet pecks you usually showered him with when he arrived home.  And it wasn’t a violent kiss, like the ones he usually took from you, breath out of breath, in the sacred intimacy of your bedroom.

This kiss was urgent and needy, yet full of the same love he felt every time your mouth reached for his. It tasted like honey on his tongue and sounded like a symphony made of the tiny moans that escaped you when he pulled on your bottom lip with his teeth.

The hand on Bucky's collar moved to his hair. The silky soft brown strands were much shorter, but still long enough to grab them, making him to groan. You felt light-headed, your lungs burning for air and your calves worn out from the effort of standing on your tiptoes, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care. The only thing that mattered was him and that blue shirt.

“What was that for?” Bucky whispered when you manage to disentangle yourself from him. Your breath was coming in short, uneven gasps that teased him to no end. His gaze involuntarily lowered from your flushed cheeks to your chest, and the rapid way it rose and fell made him uncomfortable in his pants.

“Nothing" you replied. “You just look really good.”

Bucky laughed - a deep, delicious sound deep from his stomach, echoing at the walls of your heart. You swore you could live in the crinkles of his eyes because Heaven couldn’t compare to this world whenever Bucky Barnes laughed.

Especially if he was wearing that blue henley.

Bucky’s laugh turned into a smirk when he tightened his hold on your hips - one hand was warm and the other a little colder, just the way you liked it and how you wanted it to be forever. Swiftly, he rose you on the counter and moved to stand between your legs. The familiarity and domesticity of it didn’t make it any less thrilling. On the contrary, knowing this love was a constant rather than a possibility caused the butterflies to flutter harder in the pit of your belly. 

His vibranium hand squeezed you thigh before hooking your leg around his waist. The friction of your sweatpants with his jeans was the torturous prelude before the chorus. Bucky grunted in your ear, low and deep and warm as his breath hit the shell of your ear, right before he sucked it.

Oh.

Your hand was twisted in the blue fabric, unsure if you wanted to rip if off him or be it - to hug him and envelop him so perfectly and never let him go. Your embrace was suffocating. A tangle of arms, legs and lips dancing to their own song, writing notes on your skin. It was so easy to get lost in him. To drown in the blissful feel of Bucky’s touch and ignore the revolving world around you

A loud noise startled you, pulling you both apart. Bucky quickly turned to the crash, shielding your body with his. There, in the corner of the living room, the record player - now silent - was on the floor. Standing above the wreckage, nonchalantly licking a white paw, was Alpine.

You sighed.

“Did you say hello to her when you arrived?"

“Nope” Bucky said, hiding his face in the crook of your neck. He chuckled.

You absentmindedly dragged your nails across the nape of his neck and he purred, much like his feline counterpart when he greeted her favorite human.

“That record player was so expensive” you grumbled, face tucked in the blissful blue henley. Damn Alpine for ruining the plans you had for that shirt.

“I know. I’ll buy you a new one.”

“It’s yours, actually.”

“You know what else is mine?”

“Huh?”

“You are.”

You looked up to find him grinning, mischief on the corner of his lips and a twinkle in his gaze. You barely had time to squeal when Bucky lifted you from the counter and over his shoulder and moved to the bedroom, making sure to shut the door. 

“What about Alpine? She’ll destroy the apartment” you asked, body bouncing on the mattress. 

Bucky shrugged then tugged on his henley, tossing the blue to the floor.

Yeah. He looked much better without it.

“It’ll be worth it.”

General taglist: @ivoryhazlewood​ @youclickedthislink​ 

[spaceskam]

Hi! Could you do #12 “Holding everything in doesn’t help, you know.” for Malex please? Like I need more angst in my life. 😅

from this prompt list – better late than never I hope 😂

ao3

It was far too easy to think that once they got together, their relationship would be perfect.

Michael had spent years dancing around Alex, watching him be a total badass and falling in love with him and never being able to do anything about it. They grew up in the same government facility that Alex’s father ran and resided in to pair up humans and aliens as unstoppable assassination duos. He and Alex were trained alongside each other, both learning how the other moved and how to use each other’s strengths against their enemies. 

It took them into adulthood before they realized they wanted something more than just to be each other’s companion on missions. They couldn’t do anything, though, until after Alex’s father died in some “tragic” accident involving a large bookshelf that fell mysteriously while he was going to see his youngest son in the facility’s library. So sad.

They'd been slowly dating and talking and getting on a good path for awhile now. Communication was key when things were this weird and complicated and they were focusing on that, putting physical intimacy to the back burner until they were ready. It came with the struggle of trying to date someone who had technically been raised to be your battle companion and nothing more. After some talking in secret, they decided this weekend they would finally take it to that long awaited level.

Michael wanted it to be special. They’d spent so many years being unsure and scared and hurt that this had to be special. They got a hotel room outside of the facility, got a bottle of champagne, and made sure all of their work was caught up so no one would have any reason to question why they were gone.

And it was going good all the way until Alex stopped him and walked out onto the balcony.

"Holding everything in doesn't help, you know?" Michael said as he walked outside, staring at Alex’s bare back that he’d seen so many times and yet had only got to touch it today. He stepped up beside him. Alex closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Or maybe it does, fuck if I know. Just some advice a guy told me one time. You might know him. Dark hair, nice build, highly ranked assassin..."

"I just need a minute," Alex whispered. Michael scanned his face.

"If you're trying to psych yourself up to it, don't," he told him carefully, "We don't have to do anything you don't want to."

"And if I never want to, you'd be okay with that?" Alex asked. Michael didn't know how to respond to that. "Yeah. Thought so."

"Well, stop, talk to me. Why wouldn't you want to ever? What happened?" Michael asked. He liked to think if Alex was never comfortable with it, he'd make it work, but it felt like a big jump from the Alex who was sexual when they couldn’t risk getting caught to not having any interest at all the minute they didn’t have to worry. "Are you just scared to mess things up?"

"No," Alex said, voice firm, "Can you please give me a minute?"

"Well, yeah, but–"

"Michael," he said, voice cracking, "Please."

"Okay," Michael agreed softly, slowly backing up. He stood in the hotel room for a few seconds too confused to really process anything. But, once he could, he quickly got dressed again so as not to make it worse.

He waited and watched Alex bow his head and lean against the railing. Panic pulsed through him, but he did his best to keep his cool. He wanted to help, but he had no idea how. He just had to wait.

And that wait stretched on for what felt like an eternity. Eventually, though, Alex came back inside. Michael stood up straight, his head held high and waiting for whatever Alex had to say. Beautiful, beautiful, shirtless Alex.

“There’s something I haven’t told you,” he said. Michael stared at him, waiting for whatever he had to say. It was a little weird that he kept something from him. He and Alex were trained never to keep secrets from each other, that was how you got killed. “When we were 13, my dad put a chip in both of us.”

“I knew that,” Michael said, “It’s a tracking chip.”

“Not exactly,” Alex sighed, looking around the room and avoiding eye contact, “He knew what I was before I did and he didn’t like it. If they connect in a certain way, they activate and it releases a toxin into your bloodstream and you’ll die. I’ve already gone too far by kissing you. I could’ve killed you by doing that. It was selfish.”

Michael stared at him, his eyebrows furrowed as he tried to process what he was being told. He remembered kissing Alex for the first time and feeling his fear, but it’d gone away once he realized it was okay. But, still, it didn’t make sense. Maybe they’d never touched with complete skin on skin before, but they’d been pressed up together countless times throughout the years for different reasons. If it could be activated through skin, couldn’t it be activated through clothes?

“I think your dad lied to you,” Michael said slowly, “To scare you away from me.”

“No,” Alex said firmly, shaking his head, “He did a lot of things, but he wouldn’t do that.”

“Why not?” Michael wondered, taking a step closer. Alex took a step back. “Alex, your father was a bad man who hated who you were. Why do you think he wouldn’t lie to you?”

“Because if he didn’t want me to be gay, he would’ve told me it would’ve killed any man I ever was with. It... It’s you, though. He knew I loved you,” Alex argued. And it would’ve been very sweet if he didn’t say it like he was all angry.

“Alex,” Michael said slowly, “I’ve had parts of you touch every inch of me. I’m still here. I don’t think it’s real.”

“It’s real,” Alex said, eyes wide and panicked, “Why don’t you believe me?”

Michael held his hands up and shook his heads. He needed a better tactic. 

His eyes scanned over Alex’s body, muscular and scarred. They were both under anesthetics when they had those chips implanted in them over a decade ago and they left no scars. He had no idea where they were.

“I believe you,” Michael said, nodding, “I do. So how do we fix this?”

“There is no fix, Michael! We just can’t do this! This was wrong and I shouldn’t have agreed to this in the first place! I’m selfish!” Alex said, tears in his eyes and looking overwhelmed. Michael swallowed harshly.

“So, what, you just want to stop it here and not even try to find a solution?” he asked. It was beginning to sound like he was looking for an excuse to not be with him at all. “What was it all for then? I mean, I killed your fa--”

“Stop,” Alex said, holding out his hand, “You did what you had to do. He was horrible to you.”

“What? Alex, he was horrible to you. And we never could’ve been together if he was alive and you know it,” Michael said. Alex’s eyebrows were pulled together in frustration, his lips pursed.

“So, what, it’s my fault you killed someone?” Alex asked. Michael sighed.

“No. I’m saying we did a lot to be together and now you don’t want to because you’re scared.”

“Yes, I am scared! I’m scared I’m going to be the reason you die! It’s not worth it! One night of having you isn’t worth you dying and never seeing you again!” Alex yelled. 

“Then let’s fix it!”

“There isn’t a fix!”

“Why not?! What’s stopping us from cutting it out of me, huh?!” Michael demanded. Alex opened his mouth to argue, but he slowly closed it. Michael watched his Adam’s apple bob as he physically wound himself down from a fight.

“You’d be willing to risk getting in trouble for cutting it out to be with me?” Alex asked. Michael huffed a laugh.

“When are you going to realize I would do anything to be with you, Alex Manes?” Michael asked, shaking his head, “I’ve loved you since before I even knew what the fuck love even was. That’s not stopping because of something your dad did, okay? It’s just not.”

Alex kept breathing heavily, slowly but surely calming himself down. Michael waited for him. He always would.

“But what if you get in trouble?”

“Fuck them. I’m a grown ass man, I’m tried of being their property anyway.”

Alex licked his lips and nodded. Michael cautiously took a step closer. Alex didn’t move this time, so he moved even closer. Michael put the tips of his fingers beneath Alex’s chin, tilting his head up just a little for a kiss. He kept it short and kept some distance between them to keep Alex calm. He wasn’t convinced the chip actually had anything in it to kill him, but Alex clearly was. He just had to work with that.

“Let’s find it, okay?”

“Okay.”

[wallofweird]

1. Kevison Analysis: Season 4 Episode 18

I’ve decided to write a series of analysis regarding Madison, Kevin, his ‘relationships’ with her, Sophie and Cassidy respectively. I don’t have a specific schedule for them, I’ll release each post whenever I have enough free time and energy to write it because I want to give all of you something really through, like I did with my masterpost about Justin’s and TPTB’s interviews that hinted at Kevison becoming canon. 

I also want to remind everyone that some of the stuff I say here is already established as canon, but some is my interpretation of the events that happened on the episode. 

That being said, I want to begin by talking about Madison’s first scene. We learn that Madison is pregnant with Kevin’s child (children) and this is her third medical appointment alone. Her OB/GYN, Dr. Eli Mason, asks Madison if there is anyone she could bring along for support.

Madison explains she hasn’t told anyone because she is not close with her family. Madison also shares that confessing her pregnancy to the one good friend she has is not a possibility. Then, Dr. Mason brings up the father of the babies. 

She says:

“We barely know each other. Actually, the only thing I definitively know about him is that he comes from a long line of great love stories... And this... This would not be what he wants... There is no way... There is no way he'd want this.”

Dr. Mason replies:

“Little early to give up on him. Huh? You haven’t even given him the chance to be himself yet.”

I absolutely love this piece of advice and find the words the writers chose for this scene really interesting. He could’ve said something like “you’ll never really know unless you talk to him” or “look, I get it, but shouldn’t you make an effort and tell him? You’re already discarding your kids’ father from their lives without even trying. Give it one attempt, do it for your children.”

Instead, he suggests she gives him the chance to be the person he already is. This advice sums up the way basically the world perceives Madison and Kevin, even a little bit of how they see each other. Everyone has this pre-fabricated idea of them as people who have it all together and don’t have actual problems. Or of individuals that are immature, shallow, clingy and are always seeking attention. They are rarely taken seriously, their cheerful nature annoys almost everyone around them and they are usually not seen as people capable of being responsible or deep. Also, most of their issues only get recognition and attention when both reach their lowest point. So, Dr. Mason’s words describes them flawlessly, the way people treat them and also the ideas they have of one another: Kevin has underestimated Madison before and she doesn’t believe he would want to be part of the his children’s lives.  

Madison gives him a shy smile

and ultimately decides to follow the doctor’s advice.

Meanwhile, at Kate’s house, Kevin and Randall are arguing over the fact his brother convinced their mother to undergo a clinical trial even though she had previously ruled it out.

Things are escalating pretty quickly and it almost gets physical.

And that’s exactly when Madison shows up. She greets them and apologizes for being late for the party.

Kevin’ explains that it isn’t a good time. That might have come off as rude for some people, but I don’t see it that way. Randall and him were fighting, he was stressed, the atmosphere of the place couldn’t be worse. However, he doesn’t yell at her or looks at Madison with an angry expression, Kevin simply looks tired and overwhelmed, which he is.

She walks in anyway.

“What’s going on? Where is everyone?” Madison asks.

Nevertheless, Kevin lets her in without protesting and he closes the door without slamming it. Kevin simply explains that was what he meant: It wasn’t a good time, there was nobody there and he was in the midst of a feud with his brother (which Madison got to witness a little bit). In fact, I believe there is some kind of intimacy here, in a way that he is rawly honest with her. He was just being trying to say the atmosphere of the place wasn’t festive anymore.

“Kevin, we need to talk and we need to it now before I lose my nerve,” she announces.

“(Exhales) Look. (Exhales) Just, I'm... I'm not sure what we need to talk about, honestly, okay? Uh, look, you were lonely, I get that. I was, uh, heartbroken. And I don't know why we have to relitigate the whole stupid thing. I just... You know, we made a mistake...”

Again, I don’t interpret this moment as Kevin being rude to her. He was having a terrible day and he was arguing with his brother just a few minutes ago. Not to mention that despite having a better approach to the situation, Kevin is still affected by his mother’s diagnosis and worries about her health. The last couple of months weren’t easy for him and that day was only making matters worse. 

Besides, Madison herself has expressed regret for sleeping with Kevin and classified their hookup as something stupid too. She even admitted that she was feeling embarrassed by it.

Kevin was disturbed, he wasn’t thinking clearly. If the situation had been different, I’d say he would’ve figured out the reason she was there right away. It had been nearly two months that they had seen one another and apparently they hadn’t spoken ever since. She had a serious look on her face, not a flirtatious one. He would’ve connected the dots. Still, Kevin was overwhelmed, so he wrongly assumed Madison was there just to add to his stress by making a move on him, which would’ve been the last thing he needed at the moment. When people are having a bad day, they tend to think the world is out there to get them. That’s what happened here. Yet, Kevin didn’t raise his voice, expressed anger or anything, he overall just wanted to avoid talking to people, IT WASN’T anything PERSONAL.

On the other hand, Madison doesn’t back down and spills that she’s pregnant.

She continues,

“You’re the father...

It’s the question I would ask,

and...

You are.

I’m sorry,” she murmurs.

Madison adds, 

“I know I am a complete stranger to you.

I am just your sister’s friend and...  

I honestly know nothing about you other than how much you love your high school girlfriend.

(pauses)

I’ve decided I’m gonna go through with this.”

Kevin is too paralyzed to say anything yet,

but he nods, giving a slight indication that he is supportive of her decision.

“You don’t know my medical history, but this is kind of a miracle for me. 

But I need you to know I will not ask anything of you.

Emotionally, financially, all of it. 

You can still find the great love story you deserve,” she reassures him.

I absolutely love this part, because Madison is afraid she and the kids could get in the way of Kevin’s dream life, and I doubt it is because she has feelings for him, I believe it might have something to do with her family. Like, maybe they resent her because they’ve never wanted children and she is projecting that idea onto him.

However, you can see Kevin closing his eyes, wrinkling his forehead and shaking his head. As he listens, Kevin seems to be offended, even hurt by the fact Madison would think so little of him and, I dare to say, herself.

His reactions suggest that he finds what she is saying to be a complete absurd.

And he just can’t take any more of it. “Madison,” he interrupts her.

And Caitlin’s performance here is so on wonderful, because Madison is so nervous that she barely has it together. She gasps and almost skips a heartbeat. She seems to be on the verge of losing it.

Nevertheless, Kevin is still unable to say anything. “I think I might pass out,” he admits. “I'm just... I'm gonna...” he rambles as he is about to walk out the room, but Kevin doesn’t feel good about leaving her like that and you can conflict on his face.

“I'm not walking away from this conversation, okay? I just... I need a minute to... I'm sorry. Just... One second,” he explains to her.

I’m very fond of this moment as well, because Kevin has a lot in his mind, not only the pregnancy, but Rebecca’s health condition, the argument with Randall... He needs a few minutes to process what’s just happened. It’s a great example of Kevin emotional intelligence, he knows he needs a moment to assimilate everything because he wants to be as focused and serene as possible when they get back to their conversation and he needs to take a breath for that, but it’s still important to him to reassure Madison that he will definitely come back. He’s basically saying, “look, I’m sorry I’m not in my best state right now. I’m having this horrible day and I need a second because I want to clear my mind before I talk to you, but I promise I’m not going anywhere.”

Madison doesn’t protest

and Kevin guarantees it won’t take long and apologizes one last time with his eyes.

Kevin steps outside and takes a deep breath.

His brother interrupts it.

“Randall, please, I can’t do this right now,” Kevin raises his hand and begs, because he is trying to focus on returning to his conversation with Madison. 

Randall doesn’t listen and restarts their fight.

Kevin throws back, but changes his mind and decides to enter the house. 

His brother keeps pushing and he ends up coming back.

“You want to do this now, finally, after all these years? Let's do it! You know, this whole narrative that you keep spinning, this narrative that you took care of the family, where the hell did that come from? Huh? 'Cause all I know is, if I had been there, I would've walked through literal fire, and I would've pulled that man out,” Kevin shouts.

Randall adds fuel to the fire, “Well, Kev, I guess we'll never know, because you weren't there. And he died ashamed of you.”

He rubs some of his brother’s deepest wounds, “And I think... I think that's the part that really gets you, isn't it? The shame that he felt for you and the pride that he felt for me? I mean, you're not even chasing dad's shadow, Kevin, you're chasing mine. But you'll never be him and you'll never be me, because you'll never know what it's like to devote yourself to anyone other than yourself. And you'll pretend, but it'll all just be a performance. A tired, stale performance. Like all of your performances.”

And Kevin decides to get back at Randall, “You know, I used to think the worst thing that happened to me was the day that dad died. It's the day they brought you home. Hand to God, Randall, the worst thing that ever happened to me was the day they brought you home.”

They both look miserable. Randall leaves.

Kevin shows to be hurt and remorseful as well.

He spends a few seconds regretting his actions.

And is stopped by his phone ringing.

Kevin reads his uncle message.

He gets back to reality: Madison is still there and he needs to go back inside.

He sighs because he didn’t get to clear his head like he intended to. Instead, he just ended up getting even more disturbed.

Now, Kevin seems to be a little reluctant to talk to Madison, because his brother mentioned of his biggest insecurities: not being able to take care of his mother. And it’s not even the first time something of that nature happens: his sister once mocked the idea of him being a father too. It’s something that he’s really self-conscious about: not being capable of taking care of his loved ones. So, I guess that here Kevin had just entered a self-doubting mode.

Ultimately, he seems to realize Madison just needs him to be there and goes back in anyway.

Kevin enters the room:

The beginning of the sequence was BY FAR my favorite part of the entire episode. I reckon it's very intriguing the way they played everything out: they showed Kevin entering the room and the glances he exchanged with Madison. Which, if you think about it, would normally be a really monotone, not special and weird thing to focus on. However, there is something different about the way the actors deliver the scene, specially Justin, since the camera is primarily on him.

I personally find there to be something really enchanting on scenes that are done with the least amount of elements as possible. I have a special admiration when actors are able to deliver their performances with almost or no makeup at all and no lines or footage.

For example, I love clips where character A is listening to character B on the phone or a tape and you don’t get to see character B, but you are able to feel the emotion and the intensity the scene requires only by the way their voice sounds, the hesitation, the pauses they take and all of that.

And I’m also fond of silent sequences where everything that needs to be said is in the characters’ eyes, the way they move, their gestures and the rhythm of their breath. I LOVE paying attention to all of these little details.

And here Kevin stares at Madison with an amount of sensitiveness, understanding, empathy and softness that he had never given her before. In fact, I might be wrong, but I don’t recall him E-V-E-R looking at someone in such way, much less THAT intensely.

And there seems to be a lit bit of nervousness too. 

Which reminds me of a thing Justin said about these two: 

“I think if you know Kevin and the way that his mind works and the way that he goes about his business and the way he attacks situations, when he commits to something, he’s all in. (…) Now, things have changed. She’s pregnant with what she says are his twins and with the information that he has, ‘OK, she’s carrying my two children,’ so now everything has changed. Everything looks different, right? What Kevin saw before was this flighty sort of annoying friend of Kate’s. And then it turned into this one moment that they had together where they were sort of sharing in their own misery, right? One was lonely and one was sad and depressed and it was a perfect storm and that’s kind of all it was. (…) And then the unintended consequence of all that is she’s pregnant. So when she says things to him like, ‘This is kind of a miracle’ for me, I think everything changes. He sees her in a different light, obviously. (...)”

And I don’t know if that were scripted or just the actor’s approach (I really wish I could, though, because that sequence was simply brilliant), but it seems that Justin really wanted to incorporate this idea of Kevin seeing Madison in a whole new light.

In a way, it’s like he is seeing her for the very first time.

Kevin is also taking exceptional caution in every single move he makes, even with an action as simple as shutting the door. He closes it smoothly.

And they really focus on Kevin gazing at Madison.

While none of them is saying anything

and he approaches slowly

with just such a gentle look.

There’s literally around T-H-I-R-T-Y freaking SECONDS of this scene just dedicated to these quiet moments before Kevin finally says a word.

He calmly sits down in front of her. 

Madison waits for him to say anything.

Yet, he looks away and his face assumes this thoughtful countenance.

Then, Madison stops staring at him and looks down.

It’s only when Madison is not gazing at him anymore that Kevin sets his eyes on her again. There’s just something so pure, fragile and delicate about this entire sequence that I consider really touching.

“I’m so sick of chasing ghosts. I’m tired of doubting myself,” he shares. 

There’s also something implicitly significant about this. He is genuinely confiding in her. It’s another example of that raw honesty that Kevin seems to have with Madison and not even to be aware of it. It just looks like he voices his thoughts and feelings so easily with her. They don’t have a lot of scenes together yet, but there are already two substantial clips of them talking. And on both moments, he spontaneously gives her unsolicited information about himself. It’s like Kevin doesn’t feel the need to censor himself around her, it seems like he subconsciously feels comfortable enough with Madison to show his weariness, sadness and overall vulnerability. 

And Madison doesn’t seem to be annoyed by the fact he starts pouring his feelings out to her instead of talking about their current situation. She doesn’t turn him away. Madison remains quiet, pays attention and just gives Kevin the opportunity to share whatever he needs and wants.

“I’m all in, Madison. Whatever you need, I am all in,” he promises.

Madison's eyes widen in surprise

and he gives her this very subtle smile.

Kevin continues, “I want this.

And maybe I, I, I didn't think it would b...” He refrains himself from finishing that sentence, because it could’ve given Madison the wrong impression: that he will not love his child (children) the same way he would love them if the pregnancy had been planned and the baby (babies) was (were) a result of wedlock. 

Which is most certainly not the case and he lets her know his priority from now on will be his family, not the past.

Kevin glances softly at Madison one more time.  

“I wanna be a father,” he murmurs. Again, Kevin is confiding in Madison. He is opening up to her and saying things that he doesn’t have to say nor she has the obligation or necessity to know, but he still shares and she still listens to all of it attentively. 

The way Justin delivers this line is so special too. He pronounces it with a low, quiet voice. He shows us that Kevin is venting to her, because that is something he has craved so badly for so long and was almost losing hope of accomplishing. 

And Madison gives him a comprehensive and compassionate look, because she gets it. People usually don’t see her as a profound or mature person. Her relationships don’t even get to the point where discussing kids becomes a possibility. The last guy she dated broke up with her because he couldn’t picture them having a future together. Her medical history is complicated as well and the odds of her having children naturally were almost null. She not only understands it, but also has lived all of it through the years.

“I think I’d be great at it,” he tells her.

Kevin just keeps pouring his heart out to her, because a family of his own is something he has really longed to and and for over an entire year he’s been frustrated with the idea of not fulfilling this particular dream, specially since he feels he can do it and just needs the opportunity to prove it to himself and everyone.

By then, Kevin is already talking about it with a dreamy voice and look on his face.

“The love of my life will be my child,” he concludes, reinforcing that he is serious about it.

“Children,” Madison corrects him.

It appears Kevin doesn’t know what to say now: he slightly trembles, but there’s still some kind of exhilaration in his eyes. It’s like he is asking her: wait, are you saying what I think you’re saying? Is this actually happening?

“It’s twins, Kevin!”, she reveals.

There’s something also very special about the way Caitlin delivers her line. Madison says it in a way that is so soft, because she still can’t believe this indeed happening, but there is emotion and enthusiasm too and she pronounces those words in a way that sort of sounds like she is singing. Like something Madison is still getting used to, but she loves repeating to herself and being reminded of.

And Kevin doesn’t know how to respond to that, but you can see his face slowly light up like a child.

There is this pure, dreamy and joyful look in his eyes all over again.

It’s not a large smile just yet, because he also can’t believe that’s actually happening, but Madison is able to read him and she sees in him the mix of surprise, thrill and barely being able to react or say a single word, because that simply sounds too good to be true.

By that moment, Madison is already feeling relieved and comfortable around Kevin and she gives him another smile and shrugs. He doesn’t need to say anything out loud, because Madison understands what that silence means: she has become familiar with that mix of emotions as well. She feels it, she k-n-o-w-s.

PS: Feel free too add your notes, I’d love to know your comments on their scenes from this episode. :) 

[set-wingedwarrior]

Happy birthday, fellow Aquarius! I know everyone and their mother's been thinking about this ever since A Night Off, but Bumbleby with "I told you I'm not good at dancing."/Slow dancing owns my heart.

Late thanks for the birthday wishes and for the request! I used to want to write their date as well, and your ask reminded me of that! I hope you’ll like it.Enjoy!

AO3 

—————————————————

Everyone had left, leaving Blake and Yang on their own in their room.

“…I just texted Flynt, he says they’re almost ready and will come to pick us up soon.” Blake nodded.

They had no idea where the dance club Team FNKI mentioned was, and going together sounded better than risking wasting their time searching and getting lost through Atlas’ streets.

Not that any time spent with Yang could ever be classified as “wasted” though.

Both girls spent the wait of the arrival of their friends (colleagues? Acquittances? Comrades-in-arms?) making finishing touches to their looks, not that it was needed. That wasn’t’ weird though: what was weird was the strange and sudden calm and silence.

And everyone knew that silence and Yang usually didn’t belong together.

“…why so quiet?” Blake asked, not because there was any need to fill it but just because she enjoyed having conversations with her partner, deep or dumb that they could be. She just liked hearing her voice.

“We’re about to go to a dance club, there won’t be a lot of quiet then.” That could’ve been a reasonable explanation, if it wasn’t for a little detail.

“That never stopped you before.” Blake grinned.

“Nothing gets past you, huh?” Yang grinned as well through the mirror’s reflection “I’ll be a little more specific then: we’re about to go to a loud dance club with Team FNKI. And, more precisely, with Neon; do you really wanna pass our last chance to enjoy some quiet before that?”

Blake couldn’t help the laughter that followed “You got a point.”

The silence that followed was more deliberate, but just as comfortable as the previous one, filled with looks, and smiles, and the occasional blush.

The spell broke with a loud knock at the door and a well-known annoying voice calling “Move your asses slow coaches, it’s time to go!”

As annoying as Neon was, they had to admit she was at least entertaining. The two partners shared an amused look, getting back on their feet.

Before they could reach the door, Yang offered her arm “Milady?”

Blake slipped her arm and tangled it with hers “What a gentlelady.”

“Only the best for you.” Yang winked and that said, they opened the door and joined the others, ready to go and spend a fun night out.

The club was flashy, and loud, and exactly what you’d expect from people like FNKI. Actually, it just looked like Neon had took over the place and forged it to her image and likeness.

It could’ve been exactly like that for what they knew.

Blake and Yang finally managed to get some peace and alone time (well, as much as you could get in a club) when the others left their table to, quoting Neon, “show them how it’s done”, and take possession of the dance floor.

“Having a good time?” Yang asked, shifting closer to Blake and talking directly to her ear, that just to help her hear her and not for any other reason like, for example, enjoying being close to her partner. Of course.

Blake shivered, feeling Yang’s breath to her ear and neck, but then grinned; two could play that game.

“Always when I’m with you.” She said directly to the blonde’s ear as well, adding just that tiny bit of seduction in her voice to fluster her partner, but without being so over the top to get called out for it.

Yang’s blush was a great reward.

“Good!” Yang answered a little nervously (it was adorable), then coughed a bit and offered her hand “Wanna join the dance?”

“I would love to.” Blake accepted her hand and let Yang lead her through the dance floor, looking for a space unclaimed by the other team and as far as possible from them.

The few drinks they got at the table helped Blake loosen up, she didn’t look nearly as stiff as before in their room when she clumsily tried to imitate Yang’s moves, but it was still a long way before the Faunus could call herself a dancer.

And, even more sad, the alcohol wasn’t nearly enough to let Blake not notice “I told you I’m not good at dancing!” she said after not long, stopping, but at least she was laughing it out.

Yang joined in her laugh, that was beautiful to hear even in between that mess of sounds, and stopped to wrap her arm around her shoulders “…do you want to know a secret?” she asked then, once again directly at her ear, her cat one this time, because well, that was what they were doing that night.

“Are you going to reveal me the magic secret over good dancing?” Blake asked with a teasing smile. Yang just laughed harder, concession of the previously consumed alcohol probably.

“Kind of!” she stopped laughing, assuming a more neutral tone “…people don’t go to dance clubs to dance.”

What a revelation.

“Sure, and they also go to restaurants not to eat.”

“Don’t be a smartass, I’m serious!” Yang didn’t sound serious at all while she playfully poked her partner’s cheek “They come here to have a good time, good or bad that their dancing is, without worries. That’s why they always serve alcohol in these clubs!”

“Sure, it has definitely nothing to do with people wanting to drink and be willing to spend way too much for a Strawberry Sunrise.” Blake deadpanned commented, raising a gasp from Yang.

“Don’t you insult Strawberry Sunrise drinks ever again!” she threated.

“Or else?”

They looked at each other with challenging eyes for a moment, before bursting out to laughter again.

“Okay, seriously though.” Yang dried a tear “If you feel self-conscious about your dancing, you shouldn’t be. I can promise I saw way worst dancers than you tonight.”

“Trust me, I saw.” Blake said with a smile “But it still makes me… uncomfortable. Not being able to move at least acceptably good.”

Yang looked thoughtful for an instant, before her eyes shone with an idea “Wait here, I’ll be right back.”

Blake nodded and watched the blonde as she made her way through the sea of people to reach what seemed to be the DJ’s station.

Yang started talking to him, seemingly asking for something that he refused. His answer must have been pretty rude as well or something, because seconds later Yang’s body language changed to something more intimidatory, then Blake swore she saw red in her eyes.

Whatever she said next was convincing, because the DJ nodded scared and Yang, back to her more cheerful self, left with a smile and a thumbs up.

“…what have you done?” Blake asked as her partner got back to her.

Yang gave a charming smile and a wink, as the lights turned off and the loud messy music stopped. Everyone looked confused, then soft lights lightened up and slow music started playing.

“I thought you might feel more at ease with something slower and more familiar.” Then, once again that night, Yang gallantly offered her hand “May I have this dance?”

Blake’s smile was one of the softest Yang ever saw in her face, while she accepted her hand “This and everyone else.”

Yang kept respectful distance at first, her free hand on Blake’s hip and Blake’s one on Yang’s shoulder; but just like with their relationship, that distance was meant to be closed.

Both of them felt completely at ease in each other’s arms, the trust they built on the battlefield showing off on the dancefloor as well. There was intimacy, care, and something else still too small to name, but fated to bloom into something beautiful and powerful just like them.

Amber and lilac were glued to each other, uncaring of everything and everyone else. Now, it was just them.

A little voice in the back of their heads was screaming to take that leap of faith, against another one asking for more time, claiming that the right moment had yet to come.

Blake took charge and leaned in, brushing her lips to Yang’s cheek in a sweet compromise in between the two, then settled in the crock of her neck and hugged her close. Judging by the happy sigh, the blonde didn’t seem disappointed at all.

Yang kissed Blake’s temple and held her closer, the two of them lazily swaying around to the rhythm of the music.

They hoped Ironwood would give them another night off soon.

[thorne93]

Inside the Criminal Mind (Part 18)

Prompt: You’re married to Dr. Spencer Reid of the BAU, and are a distinguished doctor yourself on the team. You’re sent down to Miami, Florida for teaching and as a side request from the FBI, to investigate a string of missing persons. When you think you’ve figured out who the unsub is, your life becomes more complicated than you ever could’ve imagined.

Word Count: 3323

Warnings: (throughout the fic –>) death, blood, gore, killings, language, disturbing mental notions, mentions of rapes/murder/etc (You know, Dexter and Criminal Minds related business)

Notes: Thank you so much to @arrow-guy​​​​​, @carryonmyswansong​​​​​, and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​ - without each of you, I couldn’t have finished, written, or properly navigated this story. Each of you helped me fish out details that were incredibly important to me. Beta’d by @carryonmyswansong​​​​​ and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​… Aesthetic by @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​​

This is a crossover of Criminal Minds x Dexter. First time writing Dexter.

Also, the timeline is after Season 1 of Dexter, but during season 14-ish of Criminal minds into Season 15. Enjoy!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Reid, what the hell?” JJ asked as she walked up from behind him.

“What?” he asked, turning around. 

“You put in an official request to not work with me?” she demanded, her face pinched with frustration.

“Yes,” he said matter-of-factly.

“Why?” 

“Because I don’t think it’s a good idea. At least for now. It’s putting a strain on my marriage and I think it’d be good if you and I weren’t around each other for a while.”

She frowned. “What, so you’re just going to quit the team or get me kicked off?” she asked, accusing him. 

“I’m merely asking Prentiss to keep us from doing assignments alone together.” He went to turn around but she followed him, still talking.

“You know, if you didn’t feel the same, you wouldn’t be doing this. If you’re so certain your marriage is fine, then being around me wouldn’t matter,” she insisted.

He stopped and turned to her. “This has nothing to do with me, or with Y/N. It has to do with you.” 

“Me?” 

“Yes, I don’t think I should work with you for fear it might fuel whatever fantasy you might have of me.”

She balked. “Uh, okay, it’s not a fantasy, Spence. I have feelings for you, and you have them for me.” 

“We’ve been over this, JJ. The only romantic feelings I had for you died a long time ago, and they have been dead since I met Y/N. The sooner you accept that, the sooner we can all move on.” 

“You know, the only time someone is worried someone is going to cheat, is when that person has already committed infidelity. Paranoia comes from a place of guilt, Spencer, remember that.” 

She began to leave when Reid called out to her. “What is that supposed to mean?”

She laughed slightly, almost a patronizing chuckle. “Oh, you mean you didn’t notice it? The way her and her friend from Miami acted?”

“Dexter? Morgan? The forensics guy? What about him? They’re friends.”

“You didn’t think she was a little too entranced with him? While you were missing, Spence, she and I had a fight in the bathroom. He pulled her out to take her for a walk. Next thing I know, I leave the bathroom and they’re huddled in a corner, whispering.” 

“She might’ve been confiding in him about the recent situation between you and me.” 

“Every time she needed something, she turned to him. Not to us. We’ve known her for years, and she barely spoke to us. Unless it was about the case and how to find you, she didn’t talk to us. She nearly fainted in the conference room and he escorted her out then too.”

“As I recall, you and I have leaned on each other quite a bit as friends, does that mean we’re romantically involved? What about Garcia and Morgan?”

She held up her hands. “I’m just saying. It seemed odd to bring him up here, and then she and him were never apart, and always whispering, always together. You did mention how you hadn’t heard from her for awhile…” With that, she left and Spencer was standing there, trying to decide if she was just trying to get inside his head. 

He thought about it, about the way you two moved around each other and looked around each other and there was some sort of secret, an intimacy there… But JJ couldn’t be right. You wouldn’t wait until you were down in Miami on a last minute decision to cheat on him… would you?

Well, you might if you thought Spence had cheated with JJ, he thought bleakly to himself. 

-----------------------------

The end of April was nearing, which meant you had about two weeks left of work in Miami, then it was off to D.C. to keep this up. You weren’t sure you could, or if you’d even be good at it, but at least you had the experience and maybe you could pick up a few tricks on your own. You’d have to work with Dexter on a disposal method once you got back here. 

Last night, you and Dexter had committed your third kill. He’d killed two in between yours. This was getting surprisingly easy. Knowing you were getting animal abusers off the face of the Earth, you were pretty happy with yourself. 

“So you’d never tell Deb, huh?” you asked as you sat on Dexter’s couch, holding a beer. 

“No,” he said emphatically.

“Rita?” you questioned with an eyebrow perch.

“No,” he echoed. 

“Aw come on, there’s got to be someone you’d tell.”

“I told you.” He tipped his beer bottle towards you.

You shook your head. “I figured it out. That doesn’t count.” 

“I don’t know. Why does it matter?” 

“Because, you are a fucking hero. Do you realize how many lives you’ve saved?” you asked, clearly impressed and excited.

“No, but I’m sure your husband could calculate it for me,” he said with a grin.

You smiled. “Yeah, he probably could.”

“He’s a really good guy. I see why you fell for him. He is very smart.”

“Intelligence gets me horny, every time,” you informed.

He laughed, leaning forward to put his beer on the coffee table. “Okay, might be TMI.” 

You gave him a bitch face. “Really, Dex? I’m not sure at this point in our relationship there’s such a thing as TMI.” 

He bobbed his head side to side. “Maybe not.” He took a breath before saying, “But I mean it. He seems to really love you. I can see it with the way he acts around you.” 

“Thanks… I hope so. I hope I haven’t lost him to JJ.”

“In my experience, people take what they want. He wouldn’t wait for her to tell him, and he definitely wouldn’t put the effort into trying to keep you if he wanted her.”

“Well what about you? You spend your life keeping up appearances, to make it easier.”

“Because I face the electric chair if I don’t,” he reminded sternly, his eyes dark with warning. 

You nodded. You often forgot that Dexter was in fact a serial killer, a sociopath. Even when you two were literally killing together. You never feared him. But sometimes, like just then, you got glimpses of the darkness within, and it reminded you of who he was, and what he was capable of. 

“In your case, Spencer doesn’t have to do all of that,” he continued.

“But what if he’s trying to keep both? What if JJ is just trying to keep her family together and Spencer doesn’t want to lose me too, so they’re going behind our backs and--”

“And thinking like that will drive you crazy. Knowing about it in advance doesn’t let you control the situation, Y/N, I’m sorry. I know you want to, but analyzing everything he says, does, or doesn’t do, won’t help you figure out if he has cheated or will cheat. Even then, you can’t control him. Maybe you thwart him one time, but if he really wants to do it, he’ll do it.”

“Gee, thanks,” you remarked.

“I’m serious. I know it sucks. I know it probably hurts, but you have to realize that working yourself up isn’t good either. Just… live life with him and be happy with him, until something concrete tells you not to be.” 

You peered at him. “See? Wise, and you clean up our streets. I swear, you should have a monument erected in your honor.” 

The two of you began laughing when a knock came at the door. 

“I’ll get it,” you informed as you hopped up from your seat. You went over to the door, still laughing when you opened it. 

But then your heart fell into your stomach when you saw your husband standing there.

“Spence?” you questioned, your pulse racing. 

“Hi, Y/N,” he said with no ounce of warmth.

“What--What are you doing here?” you stammered, wondering if he could hear your heart hammering in your chest. It was all you could hear right now, the rushing in your ears. 

“I wanted to see you. Can I come in?” 

You glanced back to Dexter who was already up and out of his seat behind you. You stepped back to let Spence in before closing the door and walking around in front of him. 

“What brings you down? Is the team on a case, or…?” you inquired, hoping he had some innocent reason for being here. 

“I just thought I’d come down to surprise you, but when I got to your apartment, you weren’t there,” he explained and your palms began sweating.

Man, you were shitty when it came to pressure. Well, when the guy applying pressure was your husband, yeah. 

“So, then I thought maybe you were at the college - I tried there, no luck. I tried the Miami PD, since I know sometimes you work there on the case of the missing persons. Then I realized, maybe, at 11 o’clock at night, you were at a friend’s. Asked where Morgan here lived and here I am.” He glanced over you to Dexter, a smile on his face. 

“Yeah, well I was just going so--”

“No you weren’t,” he said. “Your phone is on the table. Your purse is still in the corner over there, and you can’t stand to have a messy room, and there are two beer bottles opened on the coffee table.” 

“Right, I didn’t mean I was on my way out the door just that--”

“Just that… what? That you were upset about JJ so you started an affair to get back at me?” he asked and suddenly you realized what he was doing. 

For a moment, you thought he was onto you and Dex, your killings, but he was just jealous. This could be an easy fix.

“Jesus, why was I so blind?” he asked, more to himself than anything else. He ran a hand over his face. “I should’ve seen this. I should’ve been able to tell. I thought you two were just friends. It’s my own fault. I should’ve just told JJ that night I didn’t feel the same but instead I pushed you away. I was a liar. I didn’t mean to lie, but my actions caused you to go for another man… It makes sense now. How distant you were becoming, how infrequently you called. I just thought you were getting busy with finals but now...” His eyes shifted from you to Dexter, still standing still as a statue behind you.  

For a moment, you just chewed the insides of your cheeks. You let Spence believe you were a cheater, because that was better than the alternative… right? 

“How long has it been going on?” he asked.

You just looked at him, guilt and sorrow in your face. Your insides were churning hard and fast.

“Spence… we aren’t having an affair,” you informed slowly.

“I don’t believe you,” he finally admitted. “The two of you act like you have something to hide. You did in Kentucky too. The way you move around each other is more than friendly. Now tell me the truth or we’re over, Y/N.” 

Those words. That threat. Suddenly the idea, the thought of letting Spencer believe you could actually be unfaithful to him hurt a hell of a lot more than the idea of a prison sentence. 

“If it isn’t cheating, what is it? Because you’re hiding something. I know it. I may not be the best profiler, but I know my wife. Something is bothering you, something between you two, so what is it?” he demanded, frustration in his tone. But you knew where that frustration came from. You knew that anger lied in a place of love. He thought you were betraying him in one form or another, and he was hurt that you didn’t trust him any more. 

And that killed you.

Lying to him was easier when he wasn’t directly asking you why you were around Dexter. 

“You’re running out of time to tell me why you’re here at almost midnight, Y/N,” he stressed. “Is this because of JJ? Did you think I cheated so you wanted to get back at me? That doesn’t seem like you, but you’ve been colder, and more distant, I don’t know what else I’m supposed to believe--”

"Dexter's a serial killer!" you blurted out. Spencer's face morphed into total confusion and you decided to elaborate. "We both are. I've been studying him," you quietly stated. For a split second, you felt relief, but then a flood of anxiety and dread hit you, waiting for Spencer to react.

You hadn’t ever thought about how he would react. You never thought you’d tell him. You never thought you’d get caught. At worst, you assumed you’d be caught by the FBI or the police, get arrested, and Spencer would never see you again.

But telling Spencer face to face? He could pull his gun and just shoot you both - he probably wouldn’t, but he might. He could call the FBI without hesitancy to arrest. He could turn around and walk out of your life forever. 

“You… you’re what?” he stammered, his eyes narrowing as he shook his head. 

“You heard me,” you stated. 

“If this is some kind of sick way to get me to believe you aren’t cheating--”

“It’s not. It’s the truth,” you informed, glancing back to Dexter, apology in your face before turning back to your husband.

“What the hell do you expect me to do?” Spencer suddenly asked, looking at you, all intimacy gone from his eyes. 

You could almost physically feel your heart cracking in your chest at the look in his eyes. 

“I… don’t know. Maybe give me a chance to explain?”

He took a deep breath. “Okay, fine. Explain this to me.” 

That surprised you. You honestly thought he’d be calling the local FBI to take care of this. 

“Dexter kills murderers. He does thorough research on people, finds patterns the cops missed, and he takes them out. He never hurts kids, and he has to prove to himself that beyond a reasonable doubt they are killers,” you informed slowly. 

At this, he glanced back to Dexter. 

“Is this true?” 

“Yes. My father was a cop who showed me people fall through the cracks of the justice system and he wanted a way to right that wrong. He showed me a code and I follow it.”

Spence looked back at you as you started to explain more. “I discovered him when I was looking over the missing persons case. Half of them were in the criminal system, the other half led relatively perfect lives. I knew there was something wrong with that picture. Between profiling Dex, the victimology, and investigating some on the missing persons, I approached Dexter.”

“Why didn’t you turn him in?”

You let out a slight sigh. “Because Alan Rochester had just been released. Another one in the long list of people who have wealthy lawyers in a shitty judicial system. He got away, and he’s out there killing again. When I found out Dexter stopped killers… I couldn’t help but talk to him. At first, I just wanted to interview him, and possibly let him go. But then I realized… I wanted to help. I have so much rage and frustration and sorrow for all the families and cruelty that goes on the world. The violence we see that never gets justice and it just keeps going on. I wanted to… get my hands dirty. I wanted to help clean up the streets.”

“That’s what your job is for, as a federal agent,” he reminded angrily. “Did you forget that? You have broken every vow and oath you’ve ever taken, for what?”

“To save lives! The system doesn’t work, Spence! You know that!” you shouted. “They either get let go on trial, or they’re out of jail in ten years, ready to commit again and I just couldn’t see that happen again.”

“So you’re telling me you’ve killed people in cold blood?” he asked, incredulous. 

All you could do was nod. 

 He ran his hands over his hair and turned around. “I don’t believe this. Jesus, Y/N. You realize what you’ve done?”

“Yes. I’ve stopped several monsters from hurting helpless animals. I’ve assisted Dexter in making sure Miami has one less murderer. Tell me where that’s bad.”

“Because that’s not what we do!” he cried out, taking a step towards you, clearly in pieces. “We arrest them, we get them in the system, and we hope for the best.”

“Oh, like the system that let that psychopath Cat Adams manipulate guards and get you into jail? That system? She shouldn’t have been able to touch you, and you were framed for murder, Spencer.”

“I remember, I was in prison,” he stated darkly.

“Then you of all people should understand why I did this.” 

“I wish I could. But this is beyond anything I can comprehend.”

“Really? You did some shady shit while you were in prison, as I recall.”

“I did that to survive. This is different.”

“Look me in the eye and tell me you’re actually upset that those pieces of shit are gone,” you challenged. With that, Spence just gave you a steely look. “I’m not saying you have to agree with it, but you can’t pretend you’re totally against it either. We’ve all thought of doing it.” 

“Right, thought of, we didn’t act on it. That’s what separates us from the criminals.” 

“I like to think hurting innocent people is what separates us. Maybe if you knew what kind of horrors these ‘victims’ committed, you’d know we aren’t the bad guys.” 

“Wait, why didn’t he just turn them in, then? If he has all this evidence of killings, why didn’t he just show his sister?” he demanded.

“He’s… he’s not psychologically capable. Sure, he can turn him in, but his father -- He’s got antisocial personality disorder. With or without the code his dad gave him, he will kill anyway. At least this way, it’s people who need it. Not to mention he doesn’t exactly gather all of his evidence in a legal way.” 

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “I have no idea what to do right now. Part of me says to turn you both in. Part of me says to just walk away from this whole thing, and let you live your life down here in Miami.”

“No, Spence, I--” You reached towards him, it was pure reflex, but he pulled away and that felt like hell to you. 

“I can’t deal with this right now. Okay? I just… I can’t. I’m going to go back to your apartment, and you need to be right behind me, before I change my mind,” he ordered. 

“I am. Let me just grab my things.” 

He didn’t nod, smile, or even look at you. He just turned and left, slamming the door on the way out. You immediately ran to Dexter, wanting to hug him or apologize, or…. Something.

“Dexter. I am… I am so, so, sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen. I know I should’ve lied but… I know Spence, and he’d leave me for infidelity.”

“And not for being a serial killer?” he inquired, a little sarcastic. 

“I don’t know. There may be hope. I know this puts you in a horrible situation. I never wanted you or me to get caught.” 

He nodded, his face oddly soft. “I know. But if this is how I go down, then… it’s not so bad. I see how much you love him, and if this is what you need to do… it’s what you need to do.”

You smiled before nodding and rushing to get your things. You ran out the door, a final sorrowful look at Dexter before shutting it behind you. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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[violetnotez]

One Dance

Kaminari x Dancer! reader

Genre: Fluff (lots of pinning for each other ^w^)

Word Count: 1500+

Warnings: None!

Summary: When you begin to lose your chance of winning a dance scholarship for college, none other than Kaminari comes to save the day!

One Shot

(RULES | MASTERLIST| REQUESTS OPEN!!! :))

Small rewrite of one of my older stores I posted ages ago :)

Even without your partner, you weren’t giving up on your choreography, even if that meant practicing by yourself without hope of every getting it done. You were a dancer, new to the whole community of dance in your town and the world, but you loved it. You loved being able to express yourself through music, become a different person through your dances, and show off what you’d been learning in the last year. So when you heard there was a scholarship online that would give you some serious cash for college, you couldn’t resist. The only catch: you needed a male partner. And the partner you had, after a full month of finding the perfect song and working on the choreography, sadly broke his leg two weeks before the submission date.

So now you were practicing, trying to calm your ticking nerves as each day came closer and the hope of finding a partner dwindled away slowly.

Right as you prepared for your pirouette, you began to think about your impending dilemma, making your body wobble and fall from the flood of anxiety. You closed your eyes, expecting the impact of hardwood floor. Instead, your body was enveloped in strong, yet soft arms, your head on their chest. You looked up, shock on your face until you realize it was your adorable best friend, Denki Kaminari.

“I guess you ‘fell’ from me, Huh, y/l/n?” Kaminari smiled, a slight blush on his cheeks.

“Hey Kami”, you said breathlessly with an embarrassed smile.

You always thought Kaminari was stupidly funny, and extremely attractive, so him seeing you fumble a simple turn wasn’t amazing. But his face was inches from yours, his hands holding your elbows up for support. You couldn’t help but notice how cute Kaminari’s hair looked flopped over his eyes slightly from looking down on you, and that devilish smirk he wore whenever he saw you were embarrassed. Realizing he had been holding you for longer than he should have, you pushed off him, pretending to rearrange your messy ponytail as your blush began to set in.

“Hey-um, uh,” he replied, fumbling over his words, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, Yeah,” you said, brushing off his worry,”just a slip, that’s all.”

You grabbed your water bottle, taking a swig and rubbing your eyes from the heaviness of thinking of your situation. “I’m just kinda stressed.”

Kaminari’s face took on a concerned look, knowing too well that you push yourself hard and when things don’t go well, you work yourself to your max to make up for it. “What’s going on?”

“Well, remember that scholarship I was doing, and the only way to do it was if I had a partner?” You asked him.

Kaminari nodded as he crossed his arms over his chest. “How could I, that's all you have been talking about for weeks!” he said with a smile, knowing how excited you were to create that choreography. 

He loved that you liked dance- he saw the passion you had for it and it made him smile and feel fuzzy just watching you and listening to you ramble on about what knew trick you were able to do for a new routine you created, or a new workout outfit you got, or what new class you found to go and try.  And, as bad as he knew it was to think about it, it was nice seeing you in  tight workout leggings and breezy tops that exposed your sports bras. When you invited him over to practices, it was one heck of a trip for him- half the time he was practically squealing inside from seeing you look so beautiful, watching your curves moves to the beat of the music, but the other half desperately wishing he could join you in those duets you were always doing.

“Well..” you continued, “my partner broke his leg- and he’s completely out of the routine.”

Denki sucked air through his teeth, scrunching his nose up. “That bad?”

“Yep,” you agreed as you breathed out, laying your aching body against the cool mirror on the wall, “so I’m a little screwed at the moment.”

You smiled sadly at Kaminari, looking down as you rested your arms on your legs.

Kaminari walked over, sitting down next to you. He knew how excited you were for this opportunity, so he felt terrible for you and what you were going through.

A few moments of silence went by, Kaminari not knowing how to help you and trying to calm his slightly racing heart. He had had a huge crush on you ever since you two began to hang out, and he would do anything for you and your passions. He was a sucker for you and he knew it.

He sighed. “I’m sorry y/n…I wish I could do something to help you…”

You smiled at Denki’s sweet reply, thinking how he caught you from a bad trip a few minutes ago. The embarrassment was still there, but you knew Kaminari could care less. It surprised you how much you missed his hands on your body, the feeling still tingling where he had touched you. You thought of how close you were to him, and how strong his body felt against yours…Your head shot up, a clear light bulb going off in your head.

“Kami- I got an idea!!” You exclaimed happily.

Kaminari jolted, not expecting you to move so quickly.

“Um-that’s great!”he smiled, confusion set in his brow. “But what is it?”

You rolled your body on top of his, sitting on top of his abdomen, the excitement rushing over.

Kaminari’s face erupted in red, his eyes wide with confusion and your sudden intimacy.

“Okay- Denki- please, remember that one time I did your English essay and got you an A and you told me ‘I owe you one, y/n’”? You remember that?” You asked, the excitement making you smile wide and your voice hasty.

“Yeah…” he confirmed, wondering where you were going with this as he tried to avoid eye contact. All those times he wished you two would be close….he was taking it all back- not because he didn't want you close, the complete opposite- he just felt like a WRECK. Sweat seemed to be pouring out of him and he couldn't seem to breathe or think correctly.

“Well, now I need that favor. Pleaseeeee Kami?” You pleaded, giving him puppy dog eyes.

Kaminari looked at you in confusion, not understanding what you were asking until he realized it- you wanted him to be your new partner.

His eyes widened as joy raised in his stomach and he just stared at you like a dead fish from shock! Even though he felt like a wreck, he had wishing for this day for MONTHS! And a chance to be your Prince Charming, to help you out and save the day- he would be a COMPLETE IDIOT to say no to that!

You saw Kaminari’s shocked face and registered it as panic, and just as he was about to open his mouth, you covered it with your hand.

“You can do this Kami!” You cheered him on, thinking he was having doubts. “I’ll teach you everything, every step, every move-it’ll be-

You felt something slimy on the back on your palm, and you pulled your hand off his face in disgust.

“AH YOU BRAT!” You yelled, unable to hold back a grossed-out smile as Kaminari laughed.

“Why’d you lick my hand?!?” You protested as you wiped your hand on your legs.

“Because, he laughed, “you wouldn’t let me talk!”

“Well you could’ve done something else than do that.” You replied with a fake pout, folding your hands over your chest.

 “Sorry,” he smiled, giving you a toothy grin, “Let's do it!”

“Ahhhh!” You screamed in happiness, suffocating Kaminari in an impulsive hug, “Thank you!”

You rolled off his stomach, standing up and offering him your hand.

Kaminari was overloaded by your touches, and was missing you on his stomach and that tight hug you just gave him. Secretly, he wished he could have this all the time- being close, intimate, laughing-but he always just thought you weren’t “in” to him like he was with you. You guys were best friends, and really close, so he was afraid to ruin it if you didn’t feel the same way.

“Okay, let’s get to work,” you smiled, leading him over to the middle of the room.

You hit play through your phone, a heartfelt, future-soul song filling the room.

“You know Khalid, right?” You asked, Kaminari nodding.

“So- this is what I was thinking for this song- it’s basically about a couple whose going through a bunch of problems, but they can’t decide if they want to be together, even though they still are crazy about each other….”

“So just pretend you are in love with me for a second,” you laughed, trying to make a joke as you grabbed Kaminari’s hand in prep for the first move.

“If only you knew I wasn’t pretending,” Kaminari thought, his heart jolting, not anticipating you to hold his hand. He didn’t know if he could survive all this touching.

“So, all you’re gonna do,”you instructed, “is hold my hand and when I pull away…”

You stretched your body away from Kaminari’s. “Pull me back in when the beat comes back- like I’m trying to leave and you don’t want to let me go.”

“Ready?”

“Hopefully,” Kaminari smiled nervously, still flustered by your hand in his.

You played the song back, giving Kaminari a reassuring smile. For as much as he pretends he's some player or fuckboy, he was really nervous being around a girl- it was kinda cute in your opinion.

You stepped back into your position, avoiding Kaminari’s eyes as you turned the music on. Even though you had been holding his hand, and pretending to be confident, you weren’t. Every move you make with Kaminari, every touch of skin, made your whole body feel with like jelly. Your stomach was filled with butterflies, and you didn’t know if you could keep being this brave and holding his hand.

You pulled your body back as you said you would.

You began to shout over the music “Don’t worry about hurting me, just pull-“ Kaminari pulled your arm back just at the right time, taking you off guard. Your hand instinctively went to Kaminari’s chest, forcing yourself to look into his eyes. You got lost in that electric yellow, the blonde hair flopping down on his forehead complementing them perfectly. Your heart went into overdrive, the blood pulsing in your ears as you both stared at each other, both surprised how intimate that got.

You smiled breathlessly as Kaminari’s cheeks grew with a tint of red.

“This is gonna work.”

————-

Hope you all are having an amazing day or night wherever you are at!!!

REQUESTS ARE OPEN MA DUDES

[adonis-koo]

Three’s a crowd

| 4 |

Plot: (CEO AU) When your mom’s fairytale life begins to bleed over into your world you’re suddenly caught between two men and one big secret, what was suppose to be a relaxing trip soon begins to spiral out of control. All you wanted was a free vacation...

Pairing: Jungkook/Reader/Jimin, Hoseok/Reader, Taehyung/Reader,

Genre: Smut, angst, drama, angst with a happy ending

Word count: 10k

Previous | Next

Tags: Rough sex, body worship, spanking, hair pulling, degradation kink, daddy kink, thigh riding, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, creamiepies, vaginal fingering, oral (f receiving),  dom!jungkook,

Warning ⚠️ This fic touches on drug use, alcoholism and abuse. Please read with caution if any of these things are triggers for you 🖤

Jimin had that look on his face and the way he bit his lip, you could immediately tell he was not expecting you to reject him again for dinner. It was only 6 o’clock but you didn’t want to ruin your appetite for your date. You admittedly felt excited for it. You hadn’t been on a date in over a year, having resorted to one night stands made it easier since you never had time for a relationship. Any guy who had attempted often left upset at being put on the waitlist in priorities sense you worked two jobs.

To be honest you didn’t know what to tell any of them. It’s not that you were never interested or you had side pieces. You just worked the 3rd shift at a psych ward and 1st and 2nd at a bakery leaving you with four hours of sleep on a good day. Which you didn’t want to spend awake for a movie, or a walk in the park. Especially at some god awful fancy restaurant.

You supposed it was ironic sense that was exactly where you were being took but the difference was it was an actual upper class restaurant with food that was the price of your monthly rent. Jimin didn’t know any of this though. And quite frankly you figured it was for the best, he had been persistent about getting you to atleast eat with him. 

You’d admire his effort but regardless he was going to be your step brother. You couldn’t live knowing you slept with him even if it was before your parents got married. You were warming up to the idea but not enough to ever fall through with it. He sighed not looking pleased at all, eyes flashing with irritation and his smile gritty,  “You really like testing my patience, don’t you sweetheart?”

You couldn’t stop the scoff from escaping your lips, was he really going to act offended you were rejecting him? “No I’d like to remind you our parents are going to get married. That’s weird, I don’t know about you but that’s really weird for me.” You replied as you crossed your arms, leaning on your door frame.

Even if he was a good lay, and you’d imagine he definitely was- it didn’t matter. Sure your integrity wasn’t high but it was still there like damn, you weren’t just gonna let this happen. Not only was it weird but it wasn’t right either, you weren’t going to potentially compromise your mom’s happiness for an orgasm you could easily get else where. 

Jimin exhaled sharply through his nose looking annoyed before regaining his cool demeanor though his stiff posture didn’t surpass you as he answered, “Yes but that doesn’t make us siblings. We’re adults Y/n. Legality doesn’t mean anything except in the states eyes.”

True as that was you still didn’t quite believe it, even if your mom never found out that didn’t change that fact that once wasn’t guaranteed. You weren’t an idiot, in situations like these it was a slippery slope, first it was just one time, then a second and third. Even if it wasn’t likely your mom would find out, if she did...You’d never be able to face her again, sighing you shook your head, “Well then if that’s the case you won’t have a problem waiting sense it doesn’t matter. Goodnight Jimin.” You shut the door promptly not wanting to carry on the weird feeling conversation any longer.

Laying back down in bed you rested with what time you could. Physically you could’ve kept going but while on vacation you had the luxury of being able to rest mentally. Something you just had to muddle your way through on a regular day at work. You were able to just rejuvenate after an hour before you heard a knock on the door. 

Confused as to who it was you opened it unexpectedly. A maid was holding a large box, it was black and white with a long string of ribbon tied into a bow, “For you ma’am!” She said chipperly, handing the box over as you furrowed your brows. Watching her dash off to whatever duty she had next before shutting the door.

Setting the heavy box on the bed you untied the ribbon to open it. Gaping as you saw the wine red dress you had tried on earlier that day. Who could foot that kind of bill? Remembering the 4 million dollar mark flash in your eyes as you took it out of the box accompanied by a pair of matching heels. The bottom of the box though made you huff as you looked away. Picking up the small card message: Wear it for me babygirl - JJK

Except he wasn’t referring to the dress, no he was talking about the lingerie you’d imagine he must’ve picked out for you on his own time neatly folded at the bottom. He was thoughtful you’d give him that much.

It was nearing seven and you figured you’d might as well begin getting dressed. Peeling off your lounge wear before putting on the lingerie he had requested you wear first. The satin and lace was silky and just felt expensive, briefly you wondered how much it cost. It couldn’t be that expensive could it? Holding the lacy material in question you finally shook your head in disdain. It was just as soft as it felt in your hands. The fabric didn’t dig into your skin nor did it chafe. It was a bustier styled bra, cupping your breasts sitting them up high but it suited the cheeky panties well.

Considering Jungkook’s words from earlier he seemed to take on more classic designs. His taste in lingerie however was borderline raunchy, you supposed he had to make up for it somewhere along the line. Pulling the garner belt up before attaching your black sheer stockings to them. Resting for a minute before resuming your journey to finish getting dressed. Eventually you finished up your apparel, you had kept your makeup simple, knowing you’d most likely have a long night ahead if everything went well during your date. 

No less then five minutes after 8 you heard a knock. Opening the door as you clipped on your left earring. Jungkook had a hand against the door frame, looking almost predatory before smirking down at you, “Glad to see you got my gift.”

You couldn’t stop the snort from escaping your lips as you curved an eyebrow before replying, “Mhm you didn’t miss a single detail in my outfit, huh?” Knowing exactly what you meant as he grabbed ahold of your waist. Gentle but firm enough to lead you as he let his lips brush against your ear, “And you were a good girl and wore everything, right?”

Finally smirking you looked up at him, two could play this game if he really wanted to be like that. Shrugging you put on a falsely innocent expression, “Well I’m dressed, aren’t I?”

Jungkook’s eyes darkened slightly at your bratty response as his grip on your waist tightly slightly, “You wanna force me to check?” His lips brushed against your ear as he whispered, you could feel heat dripping between your thighs as a couple walked past you both as he continued, “I won’t hesitate to put you against the wall baby, they can all stare if they want, I don’t care.”

His words made your face flush and your body warm as you glanced away, unable to trust your mouth to speak as he lifted his neck back up. Gauging your reaction before snickering, “Oh that turns you on doesn’t it? The idea of people watching huh?”

You had begun to squeeze your thighs together as you took a deep breath, he was right, you did like the idea of him forcing your legs open and letting your wet cunt be on display for anyone to see, clearing your throat you decided to keep your dirty thoughts in your head as you spoke up, “Not even gonna ask how my day was? Not very gentleman like.” Trying to deflect his dirty talk as a new crowd of people had gotten off the elevator headed your way.

Jungkook looked down at you curving an eyebrow before scoffing, leaning back down against your ear as he replied lowly, “Sorry baby, but you didn’t seem like you wanted a gentleman back in that dressing room. Did you?”

Crossing your arms you look up at him sharply, not realizing the glaring pout on your lips that made him chuckle. Making you all the more huffy as you looked away. He was right, of course he was. Jungkook seemed like someone who read body language well and you must have been an open book. Getting in the empty elevator as Jungkook hit the 13th floor button.

“Did you behave like I asked?” You honestly didn’t expect him to be so blunt. He wasn’t gonna talk like this the entire night was he? You weren’t sure you were gonna last long enough for it.

Swallowing thickly you nodded, the stickiness in your panties making you shift a tad uncomfortable as you forced an answer, “Almost killed me but yeah.”

Jungkook paused for a moment judging your body language for any lies, knowing you were telling the truth he let his lips tug into a loose smile, “Good, if it makes you feel any better I’ve been suffering too. I wanted to wait for you.” It was the odd intimacy in his words that made your cheeks flair again rather then the words themselves. He had really suffered the boner just out of anticipation for tonight? “Oh out of curiosity...” you glanced up at Jungkook, watching him lick his lips as he asked, “Have you told Jimin about tonight?”

“No...?” You extended the word as you curved an eyebrow, suddenly turning to face him as you crossed your arms. Why would he ask that? And furthermore why would you tell Jimin out of anyone any of your business that went on in your bed. Watching his expression become passively sheepish at your suddenly suspicion, “Why would I tell him?”

Jungkook glanced away from you, unsure of what to say for a moment as he gathered his thoughts. Finally looking at you carefully as he shrugged, attempting to portray a casual response, “No reason. Just...be careful with him.” His eyes had such clear warning it was your turn to blink as your mouth became dry, “Not everyone is as upfront with their intentions as I am.”

What was that suppose to mean? Why did everyone speak in so cryptically? Sighing you shook your head deciding to just be blunt about this situation, “Look I’m not gonna sleep with him. Our parents are together and it’s just weird. Really weird. He can try all he wants but he isn’t gonna get anywhere.”

Jungkook only store at you for a minute, his eyes clouded with a strange sense of pity, before looking away altogether, opening his mouth as if wanting to say something but quickly closing it. As if thinking it would be better to be quiet, clearing his throat he gave a dry chuckle, resuming his charming expression as he looked back towards you, “Sorry about that, Jimin’s not really a fun topic. In my opinion atleast.”

“Well it definitely wouldn’t kill him to not always be so honest that’s for sure,” You hadn’t originally meant to voice it out loud, but you got the vague sense Jungkook and him were close friends. Or atleast that’s what it seemed like. Maybe he could shed some light on why Jimin had such duality in personality.

Chuckling Jungkook lead you out of the elevator towards the ritzy floor that appeared to be entirely there just for fine dining, “Money makes people entitled. He’s not an exception.”

Curiously you glanced at him, the air about Jungkook was difficult to read. Something you weren’t use too, most people were like an open book involuntarily. The way they held themselves, what they wore, the brands they sported. It made it almost too easy to get an idea of people’s outlook on life. Like Jimin for instance, he was like a prowling linx. He paraded around like he genuinely cared and was concerned for whoever he talked too, but those half smirks and empty eyes never slipped past you even if they only showed for a split second. His intentions were just as pathetic as his attempt to pretend he really cared.

But Jungkook? Watching him smile coolly as he addressed the waiter who had nodded, weaving you towards your table in the lowlit dining area. Every expression on his face, every move he made, it was all intentional. He said he was just blunt, but was he really? Everyone in life had an ulterior motive, that’s just how it worked. Whatever his was, he had mastered never letting it seep through his intricately placed mask.

Jungkook pulled your chair out, gesturing you lightly to sit down. Often times you’d roll your eyes at any guy who’d attempt this. You lived such an informal life it hardly seemed fitting to be treated like this. But seeing this gesture on Jungkook, it fit almost alarmingly well. Like it had just come second nature to him, regardless of social class, this was just how women should be treated. It came off surprisingly natural compared to most guys who’d fumble as if forgetting until the last second about doing gentleman gestures which often came off more cringeworthy than chivalrous.

Sitting down as he seated you, before taking his own seat across from you as you tilted your chin, raising an eyebrow as you finally spoke up, “And what about you Jungkook? If money makes people entitled, what does that make you? You can have anything you want,” pressing your lips together you gave a hum in thought, “You can have any girl you want, why bother with someone like me?”

You’d be lying if the question hadn’t nagged at the back of your mind. Not out of some sort of desperation or need for reassurance. Pragmatically speaking, you had been genuinely curious. Someone like Jungkook, he shouldn’t even be in the same room as you. Suddenly realizing how blunt you were, you puckered your lips hoping it hadn’t come across offensive as you glanced at him.

Jungkook only laughed, soft and oddly sweet as he relaxed in his chair, glancing at you with soft eyes. Not necessarily affectionate, but an odd admiration as he shrugged, “It doesn’t make me anything. In my family money was never discussed while I was growing up,” he pressed his lips together, glancing away from you for a second as his gaze faltered, “Anything we bought, anywhere we went. That was just life for me. For a long time growing up I assumed everyone lived like I did.”

You found yourself curiously tilting your head. Having not expected at him giving such a detailed response. More so at the reality of his life, “Both of your questions lead to the same answer. My father...” his eyes suddenly filled with disdain, his nose wrinkling in irritation at just the thought before closing his eyes, sighing altogether, “He’s extremely controlling. He’s always been that way. Growing up he controlled every aspect of my life. Not in the way people would assume he would.”

Pausing for a second he seemed to be gathering his thoughts in figuring out how to properly explain as the waiter appeared. Two glasses of wine in tray as he handed them out. Explaining if you had another request for a different flavor he’d be happy to serve, handing out two menus as well he disappeared.

“I’m aware, socially speaking there’s a lot of differences between us,” Jungkook continued slowly as he delicately gripped the stem of his glass as if it was a rose, glancing at the dark inky liquid as he continued, “In your world, parents are usually more forceful yeah?”

Not expecting him to glance up to meet your eyes in hope for a response, a cloud of doubt in his gaze as if he didn’t want to wrongfully assume about you. You gave a dry laugh that came out more like a scoff, “Well there’s varying degrees...” You suddenly gripped the cup of your glass tightly, your expression darkening as memories of your childhood surfaced, forcing yourself to relax as you continued, “But aren’t most parents like that? How could that be different for you?”

“Well when you’re parents are as rich as mine they have different tactics in getting what they want,” Jungkook shrugged, glancing at you again as he rested his elbow against the armrest, twirling the stem in his hand as he continued, “They controlled me, just a lot more subtly. When you have money, you can choose what school your child goes too, which families they associate with, who they’re friends are. He molded my entire childhood to fit his ideal. I didn’t even realize it until my senior year when I had met a freshman who I really got along with. My dad about blew a fuse when he found out.” 

His voice betrayed a bitter tone his expression had managed to steer clear of, “That was when I realized it wasn’t about who I was talking too, it was about it being someone who was in a lower class then us. Someone who my dad looked at as just a worker bee, someone who didn’t matter. He’s a very big elitist, people who don’t level our wealth aren’t worth our time in his opinion.”

Finally managing a drink from your glass as you set it down, letting his words soak in as you finally rose your eyebrows, “And you don’t agree with that?”

Jungkook licked his lips, running a hand through his dark silk like locks as he thought for a minute, “Well I was conflicted at first. Because I didn’t understand, I grew up my entire life just assuming I was normal, sure I had noticed subtle differences with my friends. But with my dad puppeteering my entire life it was never enough for me to question it until my senior year. I disregarded his word and hung out with who I wanted too. I branched out and found people I actually got along with. That’s when I began to realize I wasn’t so normal. I’m not even close to normal. The more I hung out with my friends, let them take me to public standardized areas, their homes, everywhere the more I understood that money? Material goods, financial security, that meant a lot more to people then I ever thought it did. Some people are just greedy for it, some people genuinely struggle with it...” he licked his lips as he rambled away, his eyes in a far away place, “It was weird seeing that, it still is weird. It feels like a foreign concept to me. Maybe that does make me entitled inherently. I’ve never known a day in my life where I’ve had to struggle with security in that sense.”

Straightening his posturing he cleared his throat, as if realizing how much he rambled as he finally glanced at you, “You’re right, I can have anything I want, and any girl I want. But I want you because I’m curious,” Jungkook finally set his wine glass down as he shifted in his seat, leaning forward slightly, “You’re forbidden, something I’ve never been allowed to indulge in. When you have parents like mine I was only allowed to associate with my friends in highschool for so long before they cut it off. You’re everything I’m curious about, your way of life, your mentality, your culture. I’m curious, I’ve always been. And there’s so much of your world to experience it honestly overwhelms me at times. I don’t really know where to begin on my own.” He ended his sentence somewhat sheepishly, which let you know he was being honest.

Jungkook’s eyes looked boyish in that moment and you could tell every word he spoke he meant. You looked thoughtful as you tilted your head. You could never imagine being as sheltered as he was, but it made you wonder. What was classified as ‘your’ world? On any other occasion you would’ve scoffed, the idea it’s self almost made you feel like a science project for him to tinker with and study for the sake of his own weird sense of curiosity about the average mass of commonwealth. 

But his overwhelming amount of genuineness put in his words made it difficult to feel indignant. Because his eyes, his whole demeanor while explaining was just so innocent. It was an endearing, genuine curiosity that made it so difficult to scoff at him. He really genuinely wanted to understand your way of life, it was such a foreign concept to you though. Could you even help him? How could anyone not experience life the way you had?

Well technically lots of people hadn’t, most people didn’t live the way you did, or suffer the background you had. But still your way of life, surely it couldn’t have been all that different, right? Jungkook left you alone for minute as if knowing you’d need a moment to muse his words. The silence was comforting and filled with the soft jazz that had been playing live towards the front of the room.

The waiter had come by after another few passing seconds to take your order, it wasn’t until after he left that Jungkook spoke up, “What about you though? I didn’t ask you out just to talk about myself the entire time.” He laughed causally though you could detect he seemed a bit worried he had rambled too much.

Shaking your head you grabbed the stem of your glass, twirling it as you hummed, “I don’t mind. It’s actually pretty fascinating to hear...” hearing your words you watched his eyes light up in relief, “It’s interesting to know that people can be raised so different...I guess I’m still trying to wrap my head around it...” licking your lips you glanced at him briefly before looking away hesitantly, “My life feels pretty boring compared to yours...if not rather disheartening.”

It was true, you didn’t have a manipulated and repressed childhood, nor were you drown in riches and ignorance until you one day grew up and had an epiphany there was more to life than your parents had lead on. Jungkook frowned as he spoke up, “You should never compare, just because your life wasn’t as eventful as mine doesn’t make it any lesser in value.”

Your heart for a moment felt touched by his words. But it made you curious, how could he be so open minded and soft if he had been conditioned by his father his entire life? “W-well...” you fumbled slightly as you set your wine glass down, fumbling with your fingers as you awkwardly continued, “My life isn’t glamorous and honestly, if you’re looking for a more accurate depiction of working class I’m not a very good example...” 

But your words only made Jungkook look more curious as he patiently waited for you to continue. Sighing you looked around from him as you crossed your legs, resting your chin against your hand as you glanced into the crowd of people, all wearing finewear with elegant soft spoken voices. Leaving an echo of a soft murmur to fill the air that mingled with music, “Growing up was...not fun.” 

You frowned prominently as you furrowed your brows, digging into your memories as you continued, “I’ve never lived a fancy or...” you frowned as if looking for the right word, “Stable life...My parents worked very hard to ensure we had a place to live even if it wasn’t much. When I was a kid I could’ve cared less. But I hadn’t realized how much of strain it had put on their relationship. Eventually my dad would get so mad he’d run off to one of the local bars and wouldn’t come back until late in the morning.”

Sighing you didn’t have the nerve to look at him as you expression finally softened, “Of course that made the strain even worse. Looking back it was pretty counter productive, they’d argue, he’d drink, they’d argue about his drinking, making him go drink more. Eventually he became unemployed and it was just my mom barely scrapping us by while he drowned his at the bottom of a bottle.” Glancing down at your lap your softened expression still glowered slightly, a bitter note in your eyes that Jungkook took attentive care to notice though you had refused to look at him, “I was forced to grown up fast, so I didn’t have much of a childhood, by the time I was fifteen I ended up dropping out of highschool to work as many hours as my job would let me to help pay for rent while saving up to move out with my mom. By the time I was nineteen one of my friends had been looking for hospital work to get experience in the field. Sense they had two openings and he wanted the company I didn’t see the harm. Working two jobs, one during the day and one at night...” 

Your eyes seemed distance as you mused, looking a bit lighter then before as you glanced up at Jungkook while shrugging, “Well it’s taxing, I’m not gonna sit and lie to you about it. I rarely have time to do anything besides sleep the few hours I can manage. But I was also able to get us moved out that same year. And after years like this I’ve gotten use to it, the lack of sleep, the minimal way of life...Jimin constantly says it doesn’t take a lot to make me impressed but...” 

Sighing through your nose your expression hardened, curling an eyebrow looking vaguely annoyed, “No one here seems to get it y’know? I come from nothing, I am nothing, compared to anyone in this place. I’ve work my ass off my entire life just to survive. I don’t know what the word luxury even means, and don’t get the wrong impression,” Your voice suddenly fumbled, faltering in your ranting, looking at Jungkook for a second before looking away almost worried, “I don’t want you to think I’m bitter, or jealous of anyone here. It’s just, everyone takes what they have for granted because they think it isn’t enough. It’s hard to swallow that when you live the life I do, when I know at the end of the week, I’ll just go back to my life, back to work and I’ll never see any of this again. But everyone here? They act like this is some sort of average business week. And I guess, it is for them.”

Licking your lips you sighed, closing your eyes briefly for a moment as you shifted in your seat, “Being here, feels weird. Everyone looks at me like circus show. Like it’s cute how I get so flustered by how much luxury there is here. But in reality, you’re right. The majority of the world will and never will be use to this.”

Jungkook had stayed relatively quiet as you found yourself unable to speak anymore. Suddenly feeling rather self conscious, this must’ve been how he felt after exposing so much of the personal turmoil he had suffered through with you. But in another way, it felt rather liberating, just simply telling someone about your hardship, it was easier confiding in a stranger than a friend. 

Because a stranger won’t be disappointed in you, or tell you what you should have done. They will earnestly listen to your story without judgement that your friends and family would carry. Maybe that’s why he had told you so much as well.

“But it isn’t really temporary, you do know that, right Y/n?” Your head shot up at Jungkook’s soft voice, an odd amount of empathy on his face for someone so different than you. A delicious fragrance filled the air as the waiter had finally stopped by your table, setting your food out for you.

“I don’t know how you feel about it,” Jungkook looked as though he was treading on sensitive ground as he continued, “But Park is going to marry your mom. Even if you don’t actively see them it’s still going to impact your life, a lot of the strain you feel right now won’t be so heavy.”

Sighing you looked away from him, “I’m a grown women...I don’t need help. Or want it...okay maybe I do but I’m also not a slacker. Of course I’d appreciate their help but they don’t need to worry about me,” you shrugged loosely, beginning your meal as you continued, “Maybe I’m just being stubborn, my mom always said I take on too much. But I’ve lived like this my entire life, how can I just drop the only way I know how to live? I know I’ve complained a lot about my life but, I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.” 

Your words were earnest as you glanced up at Jungkook, your eyes and expression both had softened significantly as you finally let out a small laugh, a genuine smile on your lips, “Sure my life sucks and I have a dysfunctional family, but isn’t that what life’s about? No matter who you are, or where you come from, we all seem to have those problems. I might not be drowning in gucci. But I do have an apartment. And I have a bomb ass cat...” Y

our nose wrinkled as you smiled, remembering the little shit stain that curled against your neck anytime you were home to sleep, “And I have two friends who are just as dysfunctional as me. Sometimes, it’s not all about the big things in life. Sometimes,” you glanced down at the extravagant meal in front of you, smelling worthy enough to make your mouth water as you mused, “It’s the little things in life, that make life worth living, y’know?”

You had been initially a little on edge for the first date you’d be attempting in months, especially when it was with someone so different from you by nature. But you had found yourself, for the first time, in a long time, genuinely relaxed and enjoying yourself. The pitfall most guys fell into with you, was in search for a romantic partner. It wasn’t their fault, there was nothing wrong for wanting that. You just weren’t the right person they needed, you didn’t want to be settled down with commitment and shifted priority that came with a relationship. Or maybe you just hadn’t met someone you liked enough to change your mind.

Regardless more times than less they’d want to take it slow, get to know you, your life, your story and family. And finally after so much pining and unnecessary waiting they’d sleep with you. They actually didn’t, because you’d never make it past the third date before inevitably getting impatient and leaving. You liked it fast, without reason or questions. It just made life easier. And if it worked out, great and if it didn’t? No harm done. 

Most guys you attracted never seemed to share the same mindset. Even going as far as horrified at the prospect of going home together on the first date. But one of your biggest ideals in a relationship was simple, he had to be good in bed. You weren’t opposed to teaching someone, but often times men had a very large and a very sensitive ego. Again you had never gotten that far to begin with. Which was why you had never had any luck from a relationship. If he was bad in bed and too prideful to learn then there was zero point in wasting your time with someone, but since most of the guys you had went out with refused to sleep with you...well you can see the problem, right?

There was something about Jungkook though, you rather liked. He was easy going but eager, just like yourself in that aspect. As if ready to jump you at any moment if you gave the word. He didn’t want to wait around and ‘get’ to know you. He was blunt in his intentions of wanting to sleep with you, admitting later to simply wanting to get to know you’re side of the coin in life. And you had no problems with that, because inherently it was all just fun and games.

An easy win win, you’d finally break your dry spell with someone you got along with, he’d be able to sate some of his curiosity about the outside world.

You could respect that. You and Jungkook had been closing that evening, laughing together at one of the stories you had been enthralled at telling, having so few friends you often only experienced anything thrilling with them, leaving you with little to no audience to ever tell it to outside your mom. And that was when it was legal atleast. Jungkook seemed rather shocked and oddly absorbed in your rather crazy stories, obviously enjoying them as he had never experienced anything close to the oddities you and you had friends had experienced.

Getting out of your seats you both had smiled with a lingering silence but he spoke up, “So about making it up to you after this morning....”

“Gonna bail on me again?” You rose your eyebrows with a teasing smile, half expecting him too. It was almost eleven and you’d imagine he was going to have a busy day tomorrow, wouldn’t anyone who lived a life like this? Something you weren’t jealous of, you were busy yes, but nowhere near on the extravaganza that was the Fifteenth Dark Ace hotel. And for that, you wouldn’t blame him, if you were that busy you’d probably bail on a date too.

“After how much of a good girl you’ve been?” Jungkook let that infamous smirk pull on his lips as he stepped closer to you closing the gap of space, forcing you to crane your neck to glanced up at him, “I’m not that mean babygirl. Wanna head up to my room?”

You licked your lips, knowing his tone of voice had come off in a way not to pressure you. After all you could have changed your mind in the few hours you had spent together, but it hadn’t. In fact it only reinforced how much you wanted this guy to pound into you, “Lead the way.” You gestured, curving an eyebrow with one of the worlds most cutest smile, not at all fitting given the scenario you were headed into.

Obviously glad to hear you wanted this just as much as him, he wasted no time to wrap an arm around your waist, leading you down the lowlit path as you glanced one last time at the stunning dining area. The crystal chandeliers that held thousands of candles in them creating such a glowing ambiance. The skilled saxophonist who played softly intertwined with the piano, and the utter divine smell of fresh baked bread that had passed by from a waiter. And- Wait was that who you thought it was? Blinking you had to do a double take back at the sea of people before your gaze had landed on a black head of hair, Jimin?

Jungkook seemed to notice your surprise as he raised a brow, looking out to where your gaze had landed before spotting Jimin as well, letting out a tiny amused chuckle before speaking, “Oh he never sleeps alone at night, don’t look so surprised Y/n. It’s just how he is.”

Watching Jimin as he smirk deviously as he gripped the girls chin, her bare back facing you with the revealing gown on but you could tell by her body language she was flustered. Still though a small indignant pang sent through your stomach, of course he only wanted to sleep with you. 

Sighing you rolled your eyes as you shrugged, deciding not to care further, you weren’t that interested anyways and it’s clear Jimin was only interested in your body. Why focus on that though when someone like Jungkook was leading you to his room, “Why is he like that anyways? I mean he’s just so…”

“Dualistic? Dunno to be honest,” Jungkook shrugged, thinking for a moment before shrugging again, “I have a few theories but none seem to really peg his problem whatever it is. Money makes up his ego sure but he just has a mentality that whatever he wants he gets. Unlike me his family is considerably lower class then us. The only reason we’re childhood friends is because our dads were as well.” Jungkook rambled on as you curiously glanced at him, so the Parks really weren’t that loaded? A flash of the private jet you had not been in two days ago flashed in your mind as you felt like you had been sucker punched. If that wasn’t fucking loaded then what did that make Jungkook!?

Getting in the elevator he finally concluded as he shrugged, “Honestly, I know you said you weren’t interested in him but I’m being serious Y/n. He’s like a predator, when he wants someone, he won’t give up. Be careful.” And there it was again, that crypticness from earlier.

Confused you tilted your head before shaking it. He kept warning you but nothing had really warranted anything for it, sure Jimin was an attractive man but that’s all he really had going for him in your opinion, it wasn’t like you naturally got along with him, “Okay, if he really is into me as much as you say…Why are you doing this?” You gestured your hand between you both, “With me?”

Jungkook took a moment to contemplate your words looking rather sheepish, as if being caught in the act before his brows furrowed in thought. Finally he shrugged loosely, that smirk curling back on his lips as he replied, “Because I think it’s fun taking what Jimin can’t get. He’s such a sore loser it’s honestly hilarious…which is why you should probably keep this between us.” He pressed his lips together, whatever pride he had on his face loosened as he glanced at you almost worried briefly.

“Well the good news is I wasn’t intending on telling him about who I’ve slept with,” You laughed lightly, not wanting whatever seemed to be disturbing Jungkook to get him too worried, “Besides you have nothing to worry about, I’ve survived campus fuckboys of all different sorts. This isn’t any different I can promise you.”

“What about me?” Your mouth gaped at the unexpected coil of smug in his tone as he pulled you closer to him, dragging his lips against the shell of your ear as he murmured, “I’m not a fuckboy to you, am I?”

Your breath had hitched slightly at the warmth of his lips and the grip of his hands against your waist, you could’ve sworn you had heard his heartbeat with his hot breath so close to you, “No,” Suddenly feeling the overwhelming desire to be a brat even though you knew the consequences, “I couldn’t even think you’re a fuckboy. You’re like a cute little bunny!” You suddenly spun around, booping that cute little curved tip of his nose as you grinned playfully. 

Suddenly giggling loudly at his drop in expression looking dumbfounded at what you had just done, “See! Maximum cuteness! You’re too adorable to be a fuckboy I don’t make the rules Kooky.” You pinched his cheeks as your grin widened, finally provoking him to grab your wrists as his brows furrowed.

Licking his lips and despite trying to look sexy it had the opposite effect, maybe it was the wine but he just looked so damn adorable trying to be alpha like, “You must really liked that punishment huh?” He curved an eyebrow, his eyes had darkened considerably and his tone of voice had deepened, finally achieving the aura he had been looking for, “We haven’t even got to my room yet and you already wanna test me baby?”

Pressing your tongue against your cheek you backed off slightly, while punishment was enjoyable you had been promised reward tonight and you weren’t gonna throw that away, “No,” you shook your head with false innocence as you contained yourself, “I’m daddy’s good girl- No I’m daddy’s best girl.” You corrected yourself patronizingly and you were surprised he hadn’t pushed you against the wall to spank you in that moment as he crossed his arms looking less than impressed, making you snicker nervously. Fumbling with your fingers as you cleared your throat, “I’ll behave.”

Sighing Jungkook shook his head, letting his disapproving gaze softened slightly, “You’re lucky I’m in a forgiving mood tonight, you really enjoy teasing me don’t you?”

He stepped closer again, as if daring you to continue as you impishly smiled, glancing away as you fiddled with your hair, knowing if you ignored the question you’d be punished, and if you answered the wrong way you’d still be punished, “Is it really a good time in bed if there isn’t a little bit of banter? There’s nothing more fun than making a dom feel the need to prove himself even when he knows he doesn’t have too.”

“Is that what this is about?” Jungkook almost looked amused as he grabbed your chin delicately, making you look at him as he leaned down wolfishly, “You want me to prove my dominance babygirl? Careful what you wish for.”

The door had dinged open, having finished its journey as Jungkook turned to face the entrance, briefly smirking while he wasn’t looking, gotcha. No punishment tonight, you were what the kids called a crafty sub, you knew just the right thing to say to get what you wanted. On the rare occasion you could watch your mouth.

Leading you back to his room the door clicked shut with a finality, knowing you could go back on this at anytime but seeing the city lights reflect off his body outlining made you swallow. Your mind flickered to his bare torso when you had first met as he took off his jacket. Turning around as he raised his eyebrows, “You just gonna stand there?”

“Shouldn’t you be telling me to strip?” You took a slow step further into the room, your eyes adjusting to the dark room as you questioned his motives. Unsure if he had this whole night planned out the moment he saw you or was simply going off of instinct.

Chuckling Jungkook sat on the edge of his bed kicking off his shoes while giving them a small kick to the side, shrugging as he relaxed back against his hand, “You dictate the night sweetheart, not me. You want to be a brat and get under my skin right? Make me feel the need to prove myself? Sad to say but I’m a patient man baby, it’s gonna take more then teasing to get me to do that.”

“So let me get this straight,” You had stepped out of your heels, glad to have them off as your feet thanked you, turning to face him as if this was a salesman gimmick that you were positive seemed too good to be true, “You’re gonna let me boss you around?”

“Mhm.” He nodded looking genuine but you were suspect as you squinted your eyes making him laugh, was this some trap? “I’m not gonna bite- too hard, do we need protection?” He licked his lips feverishly as he waited for your next move, relaxed and clearly not looking the least intimidated as he casually asked the question, you wouldn’t have been surprised if he had kept condoms on him twenty four seven.

Pressing your lips together as the pout began to quiver on your lips, “No I’m on pill…” you lingered warily in your spot, looking as if you were in the room with a rabid animal, cautious of his every flickered gaze. He was relaxed, not looking the least concerned about anything, of course he wasn’t, not when he was the one who could unfairly flip the roles here, “Boss me around sweetheart, that’s what you wanna do right?” The wicked smirk curled on his lips as he raised his brows expectantly

“Well-“ You fumbled tugging your hair as you cautiously padded closer to him, still unsure if this was a trick or not, “Yes…but I don’t wanna get punished…” you finally admitted your reason of reluctance as you trudged towards him, lips still pouting with a quiver as you glanced away from him.

Jungkook nodded exasperatedly with a patronizing tone, “Mhm and I promise you won’t, as long as you behave when I tell you too. And right now I’m giving you permission to boss me around. Make me do what you want baby, anything’s for grabs.” he leaned back against his hands as he encouraged you to come closer.

“Anything?” You tilted your head, quirking a brow in disbelief as you finally took the final step towards him, looking down at him, he looked so smug in that moment as he nodded again, “Anything.”

Licking your lips it was your turn to cheekily grin as you raised your eyebrows, having his permission before pressing your mouth closed, unable to keep that adorable little smirk off your lips as you lifted your leg up, placing your foot beside his seated position. The high slit of your dress parting all the way up to the height of your thigh, “Kiss.” 

It was a one worded command but he had got the message. Not breaking eye contact with you as if to remind you he was ultimately in charge as he gripped the soft skin against the sheer black material of your stocking, kissing your inner thigh as his eyes lidded slightly but refused to break from your contact.

Letting his lips part as he dragged his tongue against the soft surface, humming approvingly as you let your hand find his hair. Having been curious since you met him to touch it, his hair looked so silky and soft and your assumption was right as you massaged your fingers against his scalp making him shift positions of your thigh as he let his lips press up further while his tongue dragged in its path.

Finally allowing your eyes to close in contentment as his soft lips began to pepper your thigh in kisses, “Feel good baby?” His hand ran across your thigh gently squeezing as you nodded with a hum. Letting him open your leg more to get a better angle on your thigh as you felt the tulle part further. His lips pressed deeper against your skin before opening again, biting down with a nip, taking the skin in his mouth sucking delicately. Undoubtedly marking you as you continued to enjoy the pampering before pausing for a moment, pulling away slightly making him come up for air on his handy work.

Two hickies had already started to form in a shade of purple that was difficult to see in the low lights. Jungkook said nothing as he watching you place your foot back on the ground, almost anticipating your every move as you reached for the zipper of your dress. Unzipping it all the way down before letting the material drop from your body, grabbing the pin in your hair as you pulled it out, feeling your hair stumble down as you smirked again.

Watching his eyes light up in amusement, almost like a kid unwrapping a present as he licked his lips humming out, “You look even better then I had hoped.”

Stepping between his parted legs you snorted definitely an unattractive laugh as you curved an eyebrow, “How come I didn’t get that reaction when you came to pick me up?” It was a playful question as you tsked, “Come on keep kissing gentleman, I love to be bathed in worship.”

Wrapping his arms around your waist he pulled you to him as he pressed his lips against your stomach, glancing up at you wolfishly as Jungkook rose a brow, “Do you really want a gentleman?”

“Not when you look at me like that.” You replied amused though answering honestly as he continued to pepper your body in kisses, focusing more on your lower body within his reach as he began to nip at your hips. Between your lacy black cheeky panties and the garter belt it had left a snippet of your skin for the taking as he continued to nip his way to the other side.

Letting his hands squeeze against the sides as he made his way back up to your pelvis where the belt sat, kissing over the material as he tugged you to straddle him.

Inherently wanting to be obedient you did as asked making yourself comfortable on his lap as his hands ran down to your ass, holding you firmly as he dipped down into your neck continuing his trail of kisses, parting his lips to mark again as he began to suck against the skin. His hands began to delicately trace back up your sides almost making you wiggle at how feathery his touch was.

A quick nip against the spot he had been working on emitted a breathy little gasp from you that unfortunately didn’t escape his auditory, “Keep making those sounds babygirl.” He practically petted you as he stroked his hands down your back, showering you with affection and his undivided attention as he began to work his way down to your breasts that sat prominently up in the matching lacy black bustier bra.

Jungkook pressed kisses on top of them before biting down against the soft tissue, obviously finding the next spot he wanted to mark as his mouth continued to work. His hands continually stroking against your sides as he let his tongue press and prod against the spot as he finally glanced up at you, “Feeling pampered enough to help me out sweetheart?”

Eyes still closed you nodded as you heard him quietly laugh before pausing and continuing, “Lap dance me in that pretty lingerie baby, give me a good show.”

Your forearms had found there way against his broad shoulders as he finished up marking his spot against your breast as you began to press down against him. Letting your hips drag and wiggle in search for his length that you had found quickly hardening.

Your arousal began to spike between your legs as you pressed your cunt back against him almost too eager as you began to rub and drag down against his lap, feeling his grip on your hips tighten slightly, letting you know you were doing a good job as he finished his last mark, a whine escaping your lips as you felt your clit catch against the material of his slacks.

Smirking he leaned back against his hands as he let you get to work, pressing down on him from different angles, your panties were completely soaked and the embarrassing wet patch was prominent as you eagerly worked his clothed bulge as he spoke up, “Careful babygirl, you’ll get my slacks wet at the rate you’re going.” 

Your cheeks began to flare because he was right. Your panties were beyond ruined by your own wetness from how turned on you had become in such a short amount of time, “Never said that was a bad thing,” Jungkook snickered at your reaction, grabbing your chin to make you look at him, “Look at you, all red faced while bouncing on my lap. What do you want baby? Wanna be my princess right? Tell me what you want.”

Your face was getting redder as you attempted to look down towards his lap, feeling his finger keep you in place as you murmured shyly, “I want to ride your thigh daddy.”

Jungkook raised his eyebrows in surprise, as if expecting a more common request before suddenly looking smug while squeezing your sides as he nodded, “Of course you would, go on, ride daddy’s thighs princess.”

Eagerly you slipped from his lap and over to his left thigh sitting with legs on either side as you began to press down against the cotton material before eagerly rubbing yourself against him, feeling your clit flatten enough to send a jolt into your stomach as you suddenly whimpered. Holding onto his thigh as you continued to ride it, letting your clit catch against the material of your panties as you continued to drag your hips against his thigh pleasuring yourself as you whimpered again, feeling the pressure slowly building in your core.

Jungkook observed cockily, admittedly not once in his life had a girl wanted to thigh ride him until now but he was more than happy to experience. Feeling your arousal messily slip through your panties and soak through his pants, it was an oddly satisfying feeling as you pressed against him harshly, feeling your pussy part and wet further as you continued to ride him quicker, “Look at you princess, you’re making such a big mess on daddy’s thigh, come on baby keep riding.” Whimpering at his words you continued to use his thigh in desperation, “You look good desperate, it’s almost pathetic how much you want your little clit rubbed, do you need help?” Whining you nodded defeatedly as he chuckled. Bouncing his thigh in compliance as you suddenly bucked your hips your clit flattening continually at the movement stimulating as you let out little gasps, “Come on princess cum on daddy’s thigh like a good girl.”

Feeling the pressure build in your core you continually whimpered as you rubbed yourself against his bouncing thigh, feeling your legs begin to shake as he almost demanded, “Cum for daddy babygirl.”

Moaning loudly you felt the pressure snap as you obediently let the orgasm wash over you, moans almost embarrassingly slipping out from your lips as you continued to whimper and whine while wrapping your arms around his neck, burying your face in the crook as he stroked you praisingly, “Mmm that’s a good girl, good girl baby.”

Your legs were shaky and you weren’t sure if you could stand as he grabbed you by the ass, picking you up so he could properly set you down on the bed, unbuttoning his shirt as he tsked, “Such a messy baby, you couldn’t help yourself could you? Do my thighs feel that good?”

Blushing you looked away red cheeked and pouting but nodding regardless. Letting his shirt fall off his well chiseled arms as you felt your face grow hotter at his well built body display, suddenly feeling self conscious as you looked away, did you even deserve to sleep with someone as good looking as Jungkook? 

By the time he had let his slacks hit the floor he tsked again, kneeling down as he grabbed your wrists, “Don’t cover yourself, I want to see you in your pretty lingerie princess. Unless you want me to take it off for you…” he licked his lips, his fingers already finding their way to the back of your bra as you said nothing in return, feeling your face hot red as he unhooked it.

Taking it off you had instantly went to cover yourself once more, Jungkook’s hands caught your wrists in time as he huffed, “I said don’t cover yourself baby, look at how pretty you are.” He could barely murmur the words out as he let his mouth suck against your nipple, making you whimper at the suddenly sensation as his hand went to the other. 

Massaging nice and slowly while giving gentle pinches to it, sighing through his nose as he paused for a moment before sitting up to take you in, running a hand through his hair as he sighed again, “Fuck you look hot. Want me to eat that pretty pussy baby? I’m hungry again but for a whole new meal.” He hadn’t even left you an option as if he had decided on his own. Feeling his fingers pull against the garter belt first pulling it down with your stockings as he pressed kisses against your leg all the way back up to your thigh.

You jolted at the feeling of his lips kissing your well soaked panties as he hummed, “We should get rid of these hm? You did a good job of ruining them baby.” He coyly smirked from between your thighs as his fingers curled around the band of your panties, pulling them down in one fluid motion before diving in between your legs. 

Wasting no time as he let his tongue lick up from your slit making you gasp at the unexpected sensation. When was the last time you had even been ate out? Most guys found it too gross to wanna try it or simply didn’t like doing it. It was a foreign feeling having Jungkook jump between your legs on his own accord as he devoured you, sucking your clit like a tasty treat as you wiggled and whimpered beneath him, letting his tongue continuously drag against your clit until he found its sweet spot. 

Your voice was already becoming ragged and your already over sensitive body was reacting sharply at the harsh sensation as you whined, collapsing back against the soft surface. Jungkook pulled your legs over his shoulders as he straightened up, hiking your lower body up with him as he glanced down at you like a predator while eating you alive.

Feeling his tongue prick and prod at the oversensitive bundle of nerves making the orgasm build faster and faster as you squeezed your thighs against him moaning, “Daddy please! I’m so close!” You finally strangled out.

His grip on you tightened at your whimpered words while feeling a long slim finger slip inside you as you attempted to twist and turn while he kept you in place. Pumping a second finger inside you as he quickened his pace, not letting his tongue stop for a second as he took your clit in his mouth sucking against it as he let it swirl in his mouth, using his tongue to stroke it.

Clenching around his fingers that roughly pumped in and out of you when he found your g-spot you had snapped, almost screaming at the pain of your orgasm but it obviously wasn’t enough for him, “Keep going baby.” He suddenly added a third finger pumping you roughly as he vigorously hit your g-spot each time, sending you into orbit as you continuously bucked in his hand whimpering not evening finishing your second orgasm before he sent you into your third while attaching his tongue back to your clit humming.

Tears had begun to slip from your eyes at so much overstimulation but he refused to stop continuing as he ruthlessly hit your g spot, letting you practically ride his face as he nipped your clit. Still riding your third orgasm as he finally achieved what he was looking for. Forcing your fourth one as you roughly clenched around his fingers, body shaking and crying with whimpers as the liquid squirted out, coating his fingers as he slipped out of you, setting you back down on the bed as you continued sobbing from so much overstimulation, fuck had you ever even squirted before? You didn’t even think you could.

Jungkook began to wash your thighs in kisses as he softly praised you, “Such a good girl, my best babygirl. Can you still take daddy’s cock? You don’t have to say yes baby.” He murmured against your thighs as he gently massaged them, practically bathing you in affection as you swallowed back those big crocodile tears, your eyes were mascara stained and red cheeked looking incredibly tired but you were a trooper as you struggled to sit up, “I-I can do it, I want you balls deep inside me daddy.” Your needy eyes looking directly at him as you murmured, not shy but horse from so much whining.

“Mmm you sound so cute when you talk filthy princess, keep going for daddy.” Jungkook asked as he let his cock spring free from his boxers. It looked incredibly irritated and red tipped, precum covering it as you licked your lips nervously, “…I-I don’t know…you’re really big daddy.” Glancing away as he gently pushed you back down against the bed.

Smirking though he pressed his lips against you forehead, “You let daddy worry about that, you just relax baby, okay?”

Biting your lip you obediently nodded, “Okay.”

You certainly weren’t lying, he was huge, in both length and girth, it didn’t help that you hadn’t been laid in forever and it’s not like you had gotten a lot of action before that. Feeling spoiled at all of this as you felt him open your thighs again, sore from already being opened so much they sent a dull ache to your hips.

You suddenly moaned as you whined feeling his massive length slip against your pussy, coating in your arousal as it brushed over your hypersensitive clit.

Stroking your pussy with his cock before grabbing the tip he began to press it in, making you grit your teeth as you hissed sucking a breath of air in.

“Mmm fuck baby you’re tight, you weren’t joking about not getting a lot before huh?” He chuckled though it sounded strain as he pushed himself further in, “Good, because this is my pretty little pussy to fuck isn’t it? You want me to prove my dominance right? Well guess what baby? I’d fucking demolish anyone who even tries getting close to this.” 

You whimpered as he suddenly began thrusting. His length throbbing painfully inside you at such a small space, his hand slapped your thigh making you whimper out as he continued, “This is mine, all mine babygirl.” His hips continued to rock faster against you as you wrapped your legs around him letting him pound ruthlessly inside you as he let out a gravelly moan. His voice deep and almost guttural before quickly letting his hips begin to slam into you making you moan loudly as you began to wiggle and try to buck in sync with his hips. Being too fast though Jungkook laughed, “Look at you baby, even when you’re all fucked out you’re still greedy for another orgasm aren’t you?” He opened one of your legs up further to penetrate you deeper but you could already feel him hitting your cervix, fuck! He was so big, “Go on baby cum all over my cock, be a greedy little girl.”

Whimpering as he continually filled you, roughly hammering into you making the bed begin to knock against the wall as his fingers found their way against your sensitive clit almost making you scream as your voice whined out loudly, “D-daddy please- it hurts!”

Hearing your whimpering only made his cock twitch and pulse as he picked up his pace, thrusting rougher as he continued to rub your clit harshly, “Be a good girl and orgasm for me baby, do I need to repeat myself? I want your cum all over my cock baby come on start riding.” He suddenly picked you up sitting down while setting you on top of him, your orgasm already building enough to make you eagerly bounce his cock as he grabbed your ass.

Quickly helping you as you felt it eagerly twitch inside you again, “Come on baby come for me.” His hand smacked against your ass echoing against the room as you whimpered, burying your face in his neck only for him to grabbing a fistful of hair, yanking you to look back at him, “No baby you’re gonna cum all of this cock while looking right at me.”

Feeling his fingers roughly pressing against your clit against as he let go of your hair in trade to spank you harsher,  your walls clenching harshly around his cock that was painfully throbbing and rubbing against your g-spot as he growled, “Cum baby.”

Whimpering you bounced him as fast your hips would let you taking down his full length despite it painfully throbbing inside you, quickly riding his thick base as you whimpered continually, feeling yourself clench against him as your orgasm arrived quickly. 

Roughly rubbing your sweet spot as you cried out, tears close to falling down your face as he spanked you again, “Go on, cum you slut, don’t make me repeat myself.” His hand slapped your bare red ass one last time before the overstimulation overwhelmed you, crying as it washed over you, sending you to cloud nine as he suddenly flipped you both other. Now on top of you as he ruthlessly thrusted into you, slamming his cock into you as he continually moaned though it barely reached your ear. 

Pushing himself until the base of his cock was all the way inside you before he released, feeling the hot ropes of his cum fill you until you dripped his seed, his hips didn’t stop though as he drilled into you, obviously forcing himself into overstimulation as he moaned loudly cumming again from the overstimulation, his seed spilling from you even further as he filled you a second time.

Finally relaxing as he let himself slip out from you. Sweat beading down his neck as he gasped for air, obviously out of breath as he rested his forearms on either side of you, kissing your neck as he murmured, “What a good girl, you did so well baby.”

Originally you had intended on making your way back to your own room once this was finished, but there was not a single bone left in you body that could properly function as exhaustion began to set in. Picking you up to properly set you in bed, pulling the nice fluffy blankets over you both as he got back on top of you, showering you in kisses and soft praise again, “Go on babygirl, sleep you earned it.” He urged you as he continued to smother your stomach in kisses while gently stroking your waist.

Just as you had done everything else this night, you listened without being told twice. Letting your eyes fall shut as sleep gladly took you.

Note: hey babes! I’ve been meaning to update this all day but honestly? I’ve been feeling a bit down lately, I keep getting dms saying I need to add a read more tab but like as a mobile writer I’m unable too. I’ve kinda been at a loss for what to do because I don’t want to clog tags and annoy people :( that being said I still wanted to update for you guys so until I’m able to get my hands on a pc I’m just gonna keep chapter pushing 5K out of the tags. Sorry for the long note! 🖤

Tag list: @sapphireprinces5 @jazzytfw @theslumberingcat (Let me know if you’d like to be added!)

[sophexheri]

Now you're just somebody that I used to know

Lance takes a hard hit and, while he's in the healing pod, he dreams of someone dear to him and their moments spent together.

This takes place right after Naxzella, Season 4

Enjoy

Now you’re just somebody that I used to know

Lance suddenly wakes up, breathless . Like he’s been holding his breath for far too long, like he was drowning just a second ago.

His vision is all blurred, almost as if he is underwater, but not quite. I mean, if he really was, shouldn’t he be happy? It’s been so long since the last time he swam in the oh-so-beautiful Earth’s sea, but right now he just feels extremely lonely and, honestly, a little bit dizzy.

He sees a silhouette and suddenly all he feels is a huge wave of nostalgia and guiltiness hitting him, hard .

He feels like he should recognize who they are, like he has been watching them for so long in the past few years that he would’ve had them burned into his memory by now.

Nothing comes up, though.

Just a painful stream of tears, hot, boiling tears.

He closes his eyes and, when he opens them again, he is back at the Garrison.

Hunk and Pidge are in front of him talking of god knows what, because he can’t hear them properly. Again, everything around him is just a blur and faceless students walking and talking near him.

Suddenly he sees that silhouette again, only this time it’s not blurred. He sees a mop of hair he recognizes far too well. That mullet, ugh. He thinks, just as usual, but doesn’t feel annoyed or irritated by his presence, only that nostalgia he was feeling earlier. Weird, I mean, he’s my rival and all?

Suddenly all he can hear is the sound of a heartbeat. It’s beating fast but he doesn’t recognize it as his.

The sound gets louder and louder every second that passes until it gets unbearable . He keeps staring at Keith walking across the crowd of students, like he’s drawn to him.

At some point of his staring-session he loses sight of him.

Then hears nothing more, nor sees anything at all.

Now he’s in the Castle of Lions. He’s in the room he recognizes as the lounge, with all of his friends, his new family.

He looks around the room, everyone is chilling after a hard training that Allura forced everyone to do. He doesn’t feel his muscles aching, like most of the time after trainings. Huh, weird.

Hunk and Pidge are cuddled together, Pidge resting her little head of Hunk’s forearm, snoring slightly while Hunk was heavily invested in conversation with Coran, judging by their excited faces.

Allura and Shiro just watch them talk, both of them probably exhausted from all the training.

Just near Shiro, there’s Keith.

The poor guy looks beaten to say the least. There’s his usual constant scowl resting in his face, but he looks kind of satisfied? Lance always guessed that Keith was the only one who actually enjoyed training, since when he wasn’t in his room or in the lounge with Shiro, he was in the training deck beating the shit out of the training bot, or getting his shit beaten up. But he always wore a satisfied grin, which, If you asked Lance , he always found endearing.

He’s so concentrated in analyzing his rival’s face that he doesn’t notice the sudden heat he feels spreading through his chest.  He panics a little and now the only thing he can hear it’s his breath and grows very aware of it, but keeps staring at Keith’s resting-bitch face.  He suddenly laughs, probably due to something Coran and Hunk said and turns to face Lance, still laughing.

Everything stops.

Both of them are now just staring at each other with some sort of intimacy Lance isn’t used to have between them. He never noticed the huge bags Keith has under his eyes. He probably hasn’t slept that much since the beginning of the whole “Voltron” thing. Not that Lance has, too. I mean, one day he was at his fucking dream school flirting with ladies and having fun with his best friends, and the other he is thrown to the other side ofspace, fighting an entire empire for the sake of the universe.

On the other hand Keith has always been alone, even at the Garrison, except for Shiro and Adam. And at some point they even told him Shiro was dead . Everything from that probably went downhill for him. He was kicked out of school and lived in a shack for a whole year searching for something he couldn’t even understand. And the moment he finds his long-lost brother he gets kicked out of earth god knows where in space.  He never realized it but maybe they’re a lot more similar than he thought they were.

He then looks directly at Keith’s eyes and sees a void of sadness, regardless of the fact that he was laughing just a few seconds ago.

He feels a sudden urge to cradle him and that thought feels almost comical now that he remembers .

Just remembering the “bonding moment” makes everything around him and Keith disappear, his eyes still fixated on Keith.

He finds himself in Keith's room, they're standing now and both of them are out of their armour suit, Keith wearing just his t-shirt. Keith is still smiling but somehow he feels something softer coming from that smile, affection , he thinks, and if he focuses on his indigo eyes again, he can find some light, deep within the void that was filling his gaze some moments ago. He sees Keith open his mouth and say something, grinning. Suddenly he feels calmer, like he heard words of reassurance.

The room starts spinning and Keith isn't there anymore.

The lights are off and the only things left in the room are Keith's helmet resting on Keith’s desk and his crop-jacket, hung near the door. All of the calm he felt earlier isn't there anymore, that stupid nostalgia that's been bothering him until now comes back and he hears himself sobbing, with tears streaming down his face.

He is alone.

Again.

He is alone now that, after Naxzella's battle, Matt is telling him that Keith was going to sacrifice himself to save them all. That he could've lost Keith.

He is alone in his room, while he tries to contact Keith to see if he'll be back in the Castle anytime soon, because honestly, he misses him so goddamn much he feels like he'll stop breathing if he doesn't see him again.

But he doesn't answer.

Kolivan and some of his soldiers show up at the Castle, without Keith, without news about him. Lance desperately wants to know about Keith, but he holds his tongue.

Lance wonders if he has managed to sleep better while at the Blade.

Has he been able to eat proper food instead of green goo all the time? Are they treating him like the great warrior he is?

Has he found a new family between the various members of the Blade, that treats him better than how they did?

Has he found someone he cares about more than he cared about Lance?

[negasonicimagines]

Pretty Sure

request: from @xsophie-elisex​: “Also hi I love your fics! I was wondering wether I could request one? Maybe something along the lines of reader and Ellie are best friends and roommates (lots of vine references!:3) and slowly fall In love but it’s like the little things, eg : she brings flowers into the dorm and brings Ellie her favourite takeout or buys her eyeliner when it runs out. Just really domestic things. Basically pure concentrated fluff xox”

notes: This request is really cute! I tried my best to do it justice, but I’m not all that good at slow burn, I hope that a lot of the “slowly falling in love” was prior to the events of the fic. Check out freerice.com!!!! Feed people by answering simple questions! (The money is made off the ad revenue, I believe, so turn off your AdBlocker on the site!)

warnings: none!

Your room was always a refuge for Ellie. She’s glad you two are finally roommates, so that she never has to leave.

The fresh flowers, the sneaking into the other’s bed when one of you is having a hard time sleeping, the Vine and meme references… It’s the best.

Ellie does her homework, every now and then looking out at the courtyard. You’re picking flowers with Laura and teaching the girl how to make flower crowns. She catches on quickly, which makes Ellie feel a little dumb. You’d tried to teach her, too, but, despite her texting experience, her fingers just weren’t nimble enough.

Ellie looks back down to her poem, regretting deciding to take the poetry elective her school offers. Now, instead of writing whenever and whatever she wants, she has to fulfill prompts. This time, she has to write a poem about what love means to her. But… Ellie just isn’t really a “love” person, pushing away 99% of warm, fuzzy feelings like that. The only person outside of her close family she can confidently say she loves is you, and even that’s platonic… At least, she’s pretty sure it is. Platonic means friends, and you and Ellie are friends. At least, she’s pretty sure you are.

She looks up again after brainstorming a little more, taking notes on her paper. The poem wasn’t due for about a week, but she’d wanted to get it done sooner, so she wouldn’t have to do it later.

You’re no longer visible, at least through the window. Ellie sighs, not quite sure why that’s so disappointing. She looks down to her notebook, trying to think on her poem more.

You enter, jolting her from her thoughts.

“I brought us some more flowers!” you announce sweetly, going on to identify them: “Wild violets, purple deadnettle, and these little blue flowers that the internet keeps trying to tell me are forget-me-nots, but I don’t think they are.”

“Alright.” Ellie decides to scribble something about that down. She loves flowers, not that she’d tell you or anyone else that. They’re good for symbolism, and pretty to boot. You grin, and Ellie thinks: ‘She’s my favorite flower.’ And then: ‘Wait, what the fuck does that even mean?’ She writes it down, anyway, because she’s pretty sure it’ll help her later on.

Ellie’s phone buzzes, and you sit on her bed while she sits at her desk, chair turned to face you.

“Fuck, they’re having burgers again. Piotr texted me.”

“I know. I’ve got a pizza order already set on the Domino’s app. Just gotta wait ‘til we’re hungry,” you inform her with a smile that she’s pretty sure shouldn’t make her heart stop the way it does. Sometimes you’re just so pretty. ‘All the time she’s just so pretty,’ Ellie corrects herself, practically hearing you say “Oh, only sometimes?” You’re like cotton candy, she can’t help but smile.

“Not that I don’t love to see you smile, but it’s just pizza,” you chuckle, smiling back at her warmly. Suddenly flustered, she looks away, smile falling. “Sorry.”

“Uh, no, don’t be, I just suddenly thought about how people can donate to Notre Dame but not Flint, Michigan,” Ellie fibs, but then she really thinks about it, and she’s sure her expression darkens further with anger.

“Right? It’s such bullshit,” you agree. “It’s a fucking building, nobody even died. You hungry? We could eat  and go on freerice.com or kissanime or something.”

“Why pirate an anime? I have Netflix and Hulu.”

“Because fuck capitalism, Ellie. Duh,” you explain.

She almost says it without thinking, which makes her realize she’s pretty sure thought it all this time without thinking. ‘I love you so much,’ she realizes. ‘More than anything.’

“Or we could watch cat videos… You still seem a little tense.”

“Cat videos sound nice,” she agrees. “And I could definitely go for some food.”

“Cool, I’ll order.” You do, tapping around on your phone.

“Thanks, how much do I owe you?”

“Shut the fuck up.” You tell her, no malice to your tone at all. “It’s not a pizza just for you, I’m eating it too and I’d be a gluttonous dickbag if I didn’t share.”

“Gluttonous, huh? Maybe I should use that one in my poem,” Ellie teases you, pushing the disgustingly sweet thought of being in love with you out of her mind, deciding to deal with it another day, maybe not even at all. After all, your friendship meant so much to her. She was pretty sure you wouldn’t abandon her for her feelings, but she didn’t want things to be awkward, even for a little while.

“Oh, please,” you scoff. “Isn’t the assignment, like, love or whatever? Though, I guess love can be selfish...”

“No. No deep conversations. My brain already hurts from trying to force words onto the page. Love’s bogus, and-” ‘And I hate the way you looked at me when you said that.’ “And I wanna eat too much pizza and go into a food coma, not examine the intricacies of intimacy with a dork who’s never even been on a date.”

“Hey, neither have you!” You playfully retort. Your phone dings. “Oop, it’s on it’s way.”

“Nice,” Ellie says. Usually silence between you two wasn’t awkward, but this time it is. Like there’s a conversation that’s supposed to be happening but isn’t. Ellie’s pretty sure she hates this feeling. “So, uh, how was your day?”

“Oh, it was good. Is. You?”

“Mine’s alright.”

“Good,” you tell her. The two of you gaze at each other wordlessly for what must have been a long time, because when your phone dings again, it’s to inform you of the pizza’s arrival at the school. You quickly dash downstairs, casting away thoughts of just how beautifully Ellie’s dark eyes glittered in any lighting, and pick up the pizza. You sneak it upstairs, closing your dorm door behind you.

“Fuck, that smells good,” she comments, and you move her notebook and whatnot from the desk to set down the pizza.

“Ooh, who’s she?” You ask, glancing at a page in her open notebook.

“She?” Ellie wonders, already having forgotten what she jotted down about you.

“Flowers are good for symbolism. She’s my favorite flower,” you say in a hyper-feminine tone, teasing her. She’s pretty sure she’s gonna die if she looks at that adorably smirking face of yours any longer.

“Um- Well, um…” She can feel her face getting red, and that embarrasses her even more. “No one, okay?!”

You flinch away from her before stepping back a bit. Scared. She scared you.

“I- I’m sorry. I just… I like someone, okay? And I don’t like people. So, it’s weird and new and I don’t like it, but at the same time I do.”

“Aw, Ellie, why didn’t you tell me?”

“You-” she starts, thinking maybe, just maybe, you weren’t oblivious to her feelings, and that maybe you even shared them but wanted to give her time to figure it out.

“I could’ve given you advice or something! Even if I haven’t been on dates, I had a couple girlfriends in, like, middle school! And I still get crushes! I like someone, too.”

“Really?” Ellie wonders. She’s glad she somehow managed to mask her disappointment. “Then why didn’t you tell me?”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Who’s your crush? Maybe I can help!” You excitedly respond, and while Ellie’s glad that the awkward silence is over, she’s not quite sure she’s ready to play this game of conversational Jenga with you.  

“Well, I don’t really have a chance, so there’s no way you can,” Ellie admits, and you pout.

“Come on, El. You’re cute, smart, creative… I’m sure any sapphic sweetheart you’re into that has half a brain wouldn’t pass you up,” You tell her.

“Trust me, she would,” your crush disagrees.

“Well, then I guess she doesn’t have half a brain,” you joke, smiling a little and hoping she doesn’t see the sadness in it. “That, or…” You gasp with a falsey scandalized look in your eye and a mischievous smile on your parted lips. “Does Ellie Phimister have a crush on a straight girl?”

“No, no! She’s not straight, I skipped that phase. I just- I don’t know. I don’t think I’m her type.”

“Why?” You wonder. Maybe through this questioning you could figure out the girl and play matchmaker a little. After all, at least one of you deserved to be happy. Ellie tells you everything, you’re one of the few people she vents to and the only one who lives at Xavier’s. So, if she had a crush on you like the one you had on her, you’re pretty sure she’d totally tell you, even if she thought you wouldn’t like her back, because you’re her safe space.

“I think she likes, or, y’know, at least deserves a nice girl. Or girls. Not sure where she stands on that.”

“You’re plenty nice, don’t be ridiculous,” you argue.

“Well, then, I think she’s into more feminine girls.”

“Ellie, I’m not trying to invalidate you or anything, but you’re not exactly the least feminine person on the planet. Even if this mystery girl is into super feminine girls, I doubt she wouldn’t make an exception for you, you’re still pretty and comfortable being called pretty,” you remind her.

“That’s true, but- But-” She’s running out of reasons for you not to like her. Maybe you do like her, or are at least open to the possibility of liking her? “Well, she- She’s really awesome, and special, okay? I don’t deserve her.”

“I bet she’s great,” you say, suddenly sounding dejected. Had you realized she was talking about you? “But you do deserve to be happy, okay?”

“I’m sorry,” Ellie replies.

“For what?” You wonder, eyebrows furrowed. You’re suddenly looking at her like she’s crazy.

“I- I don’t know. You sounded sad,” Ellie fibs. “I- I thought you figured out who I was talking about.”

“Why would that make me sad?” You ask her, sounding a bit defensive.

“Um, uh… Listen, Y/N, I’m pretty sure things are gonna be awkward for a while after I say this, but I only fully realized it, like, half an hour ago, and it’s already eating me up inside. I’m pretty sure I love you. Like, love-love you. We’ve been friends for ages, so I get if you don’t wanna ruin the friendship, but I’d really appreciate it if you gave me just a chance to be with you. I promise I won’t hold it against you if you’re not interested, but-”

“I didn’t tell you about my crush because you’re my crush,” you blurt, cutting her off. “Sorry, I was trying to wait, but it’s been eating me up inside since we first met, so I think I’m allowed to interrupt you, just this once.”

“More than allowed,” Ellie agrees. “Um… So, uh… What do we do now?”

“I- I guess what we always do? But with kissing and stuff? The pizza’s getting cold, we can discuss the specifics while we eat and if you want that can count as our first date,” You suggest, saying the last part rather quickly, and Ellie nods. “Am I, uh… Am I really your favorite flower? And what does that mean?”

“Flowers, y’know, they’re pretty... Smell nice... Special... Inspiring… Plus, you’re always bringing flowers in, so…” Ellie, a bit embarrassed but finding herself less angry and more flustered now that the truth is out, mumbles.

“I’m pretty sure that’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever said to me,” you tell her, and she smiles softly, the most genuine smile you’ve ever seen her wear.

“I’m pretty sure this is the happiest I’ve ever been,” she responds, echoing your phrasing.

“Well, I’m pretty sure this pizza is delicious,” you continue the pattern, taking a bite.

“And I’m pretty sure I’m still gonna fail that poetry assignment,” Ellie chuckles.

I’m pretty sure this fic is over.

[pynkhues]

Hi! So I love your blog and your headcanons and ask responses but and I really want to ask you something thought provoking but my brain is like not cooperating so... what I really was wondering is do you have any hot tip fic recs? I am pretty new to GG and the tag on Ao3 is starting to get kinda long so I would love to know your picks before I start trawling through!

Ah, thanks, anon! And oh my gosh, there are somany great fics on ao3!! I barely know where to start, so I’m just going torec my straight up faves. This kind of blew out a little bit, so I’ve kept itto one fic per author (but assume I’m like, reccing all their works, haha)annnd I’ve put it under a tag to save everyone’s feeds, haha.

Happy reading!

Fora Moment We Were Strangers byopenhearts. 

I think I’ve already re-read this one like, a hundred times, and it’sjust so, so perfect. Intimate and domestic and sexy and sweet and just the rightamount of heartbreaking. Basically Rio, Beth, Marcus and Emma end up playinghouse due to Reasons, and it feels so true to character, and true to the show.It’s great.

He looks for another several seconds before a mild little grin colorshis face for a moment, then vanishes as he backs away.

“Nothin’. You just get pissed about weird shit is all.” He actuallyturns to leave the room, adding, “Laundry,” as he does, for emphasis.

Beth could probably choose not to rise to that, but she doesn’t. He’s inher house, messing with her, getting in her space and doing things withoutasking or being asked and it’s freaking her out, beyond just the fact that he’spresent and has made it clear he’s ready for a repeat performance of the barrestroom whenever they can find the time and privacy.

“My laundry,” she corrects, following on his heels, and she thinks shecan tell just by his shoulders that he’s holding in a laugh, which is obnoxiouson both their parts. “My house. My kitchen, my dishes-”

“I’m tryna be a pleasant houseguest, damn!” he says under his breath,both of them immediately mindful of Marcus in the next room.  Then, “thissome real last year shit, you know? You got all bothered about me bein’ in yourhouse where people could see, what your friends gonna think, how’m I gonna makeyour pretty life messy today like you-”

“Rio?”

StayPut and Play Along by FakePlastikTrees.

There are almost no words for how much I love this fic. It’s set after1.10, so it’s a little older, and basically assumes Rio really did cut Beth andthe girls loose after beating the crap out of Dean. They didn’t retaliateagain, but started their own shady business in the world of highstakesgambling, and it is just sogood and hot and the dynamic between them is *chef kissy hands*. 

Eyes trained on the wall, she takes a deep breath and asks, “Why did yousend me my necklace?”

“Well, what do I want with your necklace? Plus, you have my gun. Thoughtwe could trade.”

The statement makes her want to punch a hole in the wall and she has totake a steadying breath before slowly turning back around to face him. When shedoes, he’s standing, looking at the picture of the kids on the nightstand.

“Car man’s gone, huh?”

“Rio–”

He turns to her before she can finish a thought and as if he’s beenwaiting to say it, blurts, “You look good, Elizabeth.”

He’s serious now, all mischief gone from his demeanor.

FierceKingdom by emeraldcut

I’m a total sucker for fic which focuses on Rio’s relationship withour other good girls, soemeraldcut’s story with Annie and Rio sitting in a car basically baiting thehell out of each other makes me totally giddy every time I read it. It’s so, somuch fun, and she gets both their voices down perfectly. 

“Are you married?” she asked.

That got his attention. He gave her a blatant once-over. “You’renot my type, sweetheart,” he said, mock apology in his voice.

“Ha!” She scowled, fighting the urge to stick her tongue out.“You would be so lucky, but I never thought I was. You obviously like theolder ladies.” She didn’t know his age, but beneath the scruff, he had ababy face, she could tell.

“Why do you care?” The glint in his eyes told her that he knewexactly why.

She narrowed her eyes at him. “It’s my job to care. Don’t you havesisters?” Now she was just baiting him.

Rio’s jaw rocked back and forth. There was a shift in the energy aroundthem, and he almost looked uncomfortable.

Annie had watched this guy hold a gun to Beth’s head without flinching,but her messing with him about something romantic with the same woman had himlooking uncharacteristically awkward. “Her husband’s a super douche.Capital S, capital D,” she announced in the midst of his silence, feelingher stomach lurch. Annie thought this was a joke, thought it was all in goodfun, just entertainment, but now she wasn’t sure.

WeSuck Young Blood by sylvianorth

Another one thatmarries domesticity with wonderful character insight and great writing! Thisone basically diverges from canon at 2.03, but it honestly could’ve replacedit. It’s such a logical progression, beautifully drawn, and with some prettysexy scenes too (a running theme in these recs, haha).

“It’s been two weeks since you said you were going to teach me.”

Rio squints at her. “Uh-huh,” he says, like he’s not sure where this isgoing. He takes a piece of bacon off her plate. “I am teaching you.”

(Sitting here at the table in her sun-drenched kitchen, Beth feels likeshe’s trapped in a cage with a leopard but Rio is genial, drinking coffee,discussing current events in the paper and asking questions about her kids.Sometimes his questions get so specific that she wonders if he goes throughtheir backpacks when she’s not looking. Once, he brings a box of Danishes forbreakfast and recommends that she save some for her children’s afterschoolsnack.)

Beth shrugs. “It’s just – it’s been a while and we haven’t doneanything. You just show up here and drink my coffee and tell me to be a bossbitch and leave and I don’t know what’s going on. You haven’t even showed mehow to fire a gun. I still can’ t lie. I still can’t kill anybody. You don’teven tell me what being a boss bitch entails, only that I’ve gotta do it. Imean, I got rid of Annie’s boss, so if anything, you owe it to me to teach me.”

Una Lady Como Tú bySleepylotus

This one haseverything! Beth and Rio on a stakeout! Snarking! Shotgunning! Car sex! It’s sogood, and so sexy, and just genuinely a lot of fun. 

“This wasn’t supposed to take this long,” Rio grumbled, tapping theclock with one long finger. “Your kiddos gonna wake up wonderin’ where Mamais?”

He almost sounded worried about them, which threw Beth off a fewdegrees. “No, they’re with their father at the family cabin up on thePeninsula,” she answered. “They’ll be gone all week.”

This won her a sideways look that sent a small shiver down her spine.“You all alone in that big house, baby girl?”

Narrowing her eyes, she lifted her chin. “I’m perfectly fine on my own,thank you.”

Rio chuckled under his breath. “Yeah, I believe that.” Strangely, itsounded like he really did.

PTA Vibes by greyish 

This is just so.much. fun. The banter! The Rio POV! The swings and roundabouts of the Beth xRio intimacy! It’s honestly just got such a great energy to it, and is sowell-written, I love it. 

The first PTA meeting he walked into, she’d given him a look of totalabject horror before quickly resuming her standard Passive Housewifeexpression. He’d enjoyed riling her up until she completely cracked, yellinggluten-free snacks are non-negotiable! at him across the table like a maniacand stunning the rest of the room into silence. They’d stared at each otherintensely until someone awkwardly cleared their throat and suggested they takea tea break

(She’d pulled him aside and demanded to know why he was trying to fuckwith her by attending a PTA meeting. He denied it lazily, not even trying tosound genuine. She’d carved out a space in his life like it was nothing. Hewanted to retaliate. Invade every aspect of her existence.)

She’d stormed off and spent the rest of the break agressively loading apaper plate with pieces of cantelope and then left it on the table withouteating any. He’s pretty sure that’s when the betting started.

A Bit of Reciprocity by nottonyharrison

Another one set post2.04, this is just really, really great. It’s more these quick snapshots ofBeth and Rio that comply with canon, but also give really great insights intoboth characters. It’s fun, and dirty, and complicated, because the charactersare fun, and dirty, and complicated, and I just love that. 

She straightens her dress and checks her makeup before she leaves, Heruns a hand over her hair to flatten a couple of strands at the back, and runsa hand towel up her leg and then she’s gone, the door closing softly behindher. His eyes lift to the mirror and he can see his hands shaking.

He didn’t kiss her, not on the mouth. He recognised her husband as heturned in his chair trying to catch the wait staff’s eye. If he’s being honestwith himself, the idea of her returning to the table dishevelled and obviouslyfucked out turns him on more than anything, but there’s a time and a place andthis definitely isn’t it.

HaveIt Your Way by ohmisterjapan

Oh my god, everything about this series is just hot. It’s a realpowerplay series, so if you’re not into that, it might not be for you, butohmisterjapan captures so well the dynamic between Beth and Rio, and both oftheir alpha personalities competing in, ya know, a very sexy way. It’s so, so,so good. 

“You set up a meeting already?” he cuts her off, visibly irritated.

There’s a beat.

“I handled it.” She holds his eye contact. He feels one of his guysshift behind him.

Another beat. He grimaces a little then leers.

“Oh you handled it? You made a decision without talking it through withyour partner, huh?”

“I did what needed to be done.” She’s deliberately light and assertivewith him and he’s so pleased and displeased at once that he barks out a laugh.He looks round to both his guys; they’re poised but, Rio notices, look a littleuncertain. He’s tries to push that observation away because if he acknowledgesit then he might also acknowledge that he, too, feels little uncertain ofhimself. And then he feels a twinge of foolishness. He snaps himself out of it.He taught her.

Suream using you byAniara 

This is actually, I think, one of the most underrated fics in the GGtag. It’s tagged as Rio/OC, but it’s actually more like Rio/Beth but from theopinion of an OC he’s fucking instead of Beth, and ugh,it’s so good. I mean: 

“[Rio’s] eyes soften and he looks away. It’s too late because before hedoes she catches the rest of his features turn almost tender. She’s seen thatlook, not just in Lee, but all the men who’ve been interested in her. It’s alook of beginning but this one is clouded with apprehension. He’s hot for thispearl lady and not just for her body.

It gets to the point his skin buzzes sometimes when she sees him. Shehalf expects him to whisper her name when they’re getting it on but he doesn’t.He’s tight lipped about most things, she figures, so why not this.”  

Annnnnnnd, I mean, it’s not a rec exactly, but a casual reminder that I’mflashindie on ao3 and you can read my stuff here, haha. :-) 

[heyyyharry]

Home

(from the Flatmate!Harry Series)

...in which Harry loses a loved one, and Y/N follows him back home for a funeral.

Warning: fluff, angst, fluff again because why not?! 

By the way I’m considering starting a new series after this one (it’s not that this series is coming to an end soon, I just want to take time and brainstorm first), sooooo I’m open to suggestions. This series began with an anon suggestion and look how far we’ve come my babies. Anyway, PLEASE PROCEED.

Y/N comes home after the usual long and tiring morning lectures (which Harry skipped, as he normally does). She doesn’t know if she remembers most of the things the professor said today, but all that matters to her as she gets off the bus is that, she cannot wait to fall onto her bed, and take a long nap for the entire afternoon.

When she’s waiting for the lift, however, her sister arrives out of the blue. Yes, she’s given Maisie her address but it was for emergency only, and Maisie did specifically ask Y/N not to tell anyone about her coming back, which is why Y/N is completely in shock to see her now. 

Without waiting for a proper question, Maisie straightforward tells Y/N she’s actually here to pick up her daughter Eleanor.

“El's here?!” Y/N questions with furrowed eyebrows, then hurries into the lift with Maisie when it arrives. The door closes in front of them. Maisie presses the button and turns to her dumbfounded sister with a smile on her face. 

“Yeah, your boyfriend’s babysitting her.”

This news shocks Y/N even more. “Hold on! You two met Harry?”

“Yeah. I think it’s about time.” Maisie gives her little sister a simple shrug. “I came to apologize for causing the fight between you two. Then Eleanor asked to come along, and you weren’t home, and I had to run errands, so Harry told me to leave her there with him.”

“You do realize you left your child with another child right?” Y/N snorts. “Harry can’t babysit. He did it once with me and ended up getting bullied by that kid.”

Maisie lets out a laugh then shakes her head slightly. “That can’t be true. He was great with El. He’s more like a father than her real father was.”

Y/N doesn’t say anything but she’s secretly enjoying it. She likes it when people compliment Harry, her Harry. She’s just proud to have a boyfriend like him, even though sometimes he can be an idiot.

“Everything’s fine between you two right?”

“Yeah...I think.” 

That’s not a lie, but not exactly the truth either, it depends on how you define ‘fine’ in Maisie’s question. If ‘fine’ here means ‘still together’ then yeah, everything’s fine. But if ‘fine’ means ‘back to the way things were before their big fight’, then everything’s not fine. 

“I don’t want us to break up, but I need more time to forgive you completely,” Y/N told him the morning after the incident, and Harry replied that he completely understood and respected her decision. Then, he asked her if she would still love him the same after the mistake he’d made, to which she said yes without hesitation. 

She loves him to pieces, it’s true. That doesn’t mean she can just shake off this unsettling feeling, which has everything to do with the fact that Harry came to see his old fling, Olivia. 

When Harry swore that he didn’t cheat, Y/N believed him entirely. What bothers her is that he knew doing so would hurt her, and he did it anyway, which is a very selfish act towards the person he claims to love so much. 

“You can’t blame only him, it’s also your fault!” Maisie rolls her eyes when the door of the lift opens in front of them and they step out one by one. “You completely shut him out.”

“Because of you! You told me not to tell him.”

“Now you’re just blaming everyone but yourself!”

“Why are you defending my boyfriend? I’m your sister!” Y/N huffs as she searches in her bag for the keys.

“Just sayin’. I mean sure it was childish, but Harry did what he did because he wanted your attention, and the moment he realized he’d made a mistake, he drove home, drunk, to see you. He could’ve crashed his car and all you cared about was him coming to see his ex. Even though you’re my sister, I can’t be on your side on this, honey.”

Y/N freezes for a brief second before turning the key to open the door to her flat. She doesn’t say anything but it doesn’t mean she’s impervious. As a matter of fact, it’s not until now does she start to look at the whole situation from Harry’s perspective.

“Wait here, I’ll go get them,” Y/N tells Maisie as she walks to Harry’s room, where the laughters are coming from. The door’s left opened, but Harry and five-year-old Eleanor are too caught up in their little game to notice Y/N at the entrance. She doesn’t intend to interrupt the pair anyway, at least not right now. Leaning one shoulder against the door frame, Y/N crosses her arms in front of her chest while silently watching her two favorite people.

“That’s not how you hold a teacup, Prince Harry!” Eleanor clicks her tongue in disapproval, then asks Harry to carefully watch how she does it. Harry furrows his eyebrows and struggles a bit but he nails it eventually, smirking proudly to himself.

“Is this correct, Princess Eleanor?” he asks, given a nod as an answer.

“Yes!” Eleanor smiles happily as she gracefully lifts the pink plastic teacup to her lips then pretends to sip the non-existent liquid, sighing contently afterwards as if she was enjoying a real cup of tea. “how’s the tea, Prince Harry?”

“Perfect. Thank you!”

“You’re welcome!”

The way Eleanor speaks really amuses Harry. He pauses to gaze at her.

“How do you know all this? You’re five!”

The little girl raises an eyebrow at him as if he just asked her the dumbest question in the world.

“I think only you don’t know this.”

Her attitude makes him chuckle a bit.

“You and your aunt are always bullying me!” Harry makes a dramatic sad face, which causes Eleanor to crack up, and he swears she has the cutest giggle he’s ever heard. Meanwhile, at the door, Y/N has to bite onto her bottom lip to hold back a laugh for she doesn’t want to interrupt their adorable conversation.

“Aunt Y/N told mum you were the only boy she’s loved.”

“Really?” Harry starts beaming immediately. “She really said that?”

Y/N rolls her eyes. The fact that Harry knows she loves him already but still reacts in such a way instantly puts a smile on her lips.

“Is she the only girl you love, Prince Harry?”

“Yes, she’s my one and only princess,” Harry says, then suddenly, notices the frown on the little girl’s face.

“What’s wrong?” he asks.

As her stare falls to her lap, little Eleanor mumbles her answer, “I wish I was your princess.”

Harry breathes out a soft laugh as a reaction. Gently, he strokes her hair then slouches down a bit so his face’s the same level as hers before he says, “I think my heart has room for two princesses.”

“Really?”

“Yes, love.”

The radiance on her niece’s face after that makes Y/N giggle out loud, causing two heads to immediately turn to the door.

“Heeeeeey, intruder!” Harry cries out, pointing his finger at Y/N but Eleanor’s so happy to see her aunt that she cannot stay in character for any longer.

“Aunt Y/N!” She screams in joy before hopping off the bed to run into Y/N’s arms so the older girl can pick her up.

“Oh my God, you little traitor!” Harry breathes, throwing both hands in the air, earning a loving smile from Y/N.

...

Harry and Y/N say their goodbyes to her sister and niece then watch Eleanor’s frown disappear behind the lift door. Though the little girl begged her mother to let her finish her royal tea session with Harry, Maisie plainly said no. She knew the couple had unfinished business to take care of, and it’d be better if they were left alone to do so.

“So...” Y/N trails off as she closes the door behind them. “Prince Harry, huh?”

“Are you gonna make fun of me now?” Harry rolls his eyes, making Y/N laugh.

“No.” She shakes her head slowly, then to his surprise, marches towards him and wraps her arms around his waist. 

“I would never, Your Highness.”

Harry holds eye contact with his girlfriend, with a smug on his face, he says, “is it weird that I’m slightly turned on by this?”

“A little bit, yeah.” Y/N squints her eyes and bites her lip. “But honestly I don’t mind.”

Harry's feeling elated right now, Y/N has no idea. The fact that he hasn’t touched her for days has been irritating. He misses her a whole lot, and he didn’t even know it was possible to miss someone you saw almost 24 hours a day. 

“Am I forgiven?” he asks, and she answers him with a kiss on the lips.

“You are, only because I don’t want El to be your new favorite girl.”

“New favorite girl?!” Harry pretends to be shocked. “Y/N, she’s my only favorite girl!”

Y/N huffs in humor and slightly hits his chest, laughing as he grabs her by the arms and showers her face with small kisses.

“Okay, okay, stop, I need to tell you something!”

“Yes?”

She snorts before running her fingers through his hair. 

“I’m sorry for shutting you out,” she confesses. “I promise I won’t do it again, gonna be 100 percent honest with you from now on.”

“I’d appreciate that. Thank you, baby.”

“But you have to promise me this.” She puts both hands on his cheeks, making sure he’s looking at her. “No more Olivia. I’m not telling you to stop being her friend, that’d be too much, but I don’t want you to spend too much time with her, okay? She tried to convince you to cheat on me. That’s just not fine.”

Harry nods instantly. “Got it, no more Olivia.”

Then he takes her hands away from his face to give each of them a kiss, before wrapping them around his neck, pulling her closer. Y/N misses their intimacy. She misses the way he looks at her with adoration in his eyes, his unnecessary compliments to make her feel good about herself, his goodnights, good mornings, soft kisses, and more. She just misses him in general.

With one hand cupping her cheek, Harry runs his thumb across her lips then leans down to lay a soft kiss on them. 

“You know I love you, right?” he asks.

"How can I not when you remind me every five minutes?” Y/N rolls her eyes skyward, still she adds, “I also very love you.”

In this moment, Harry swears he’s once again the happiest man in the world. Nonetheless, happiness has its own downside: it never lasts forever. Every moment comes to an end, only this time, the delight on Harry’s face is too short-lived.

“Who is it?” Y/N asks when Harry pulls out his ringing phone from his pocket.

“It’s my mum.”

Y/N already has a bad feeling when Harry picks up that call. She cannot hear what Anne says on the other line, but she notices how her boyfriend’s facial expression transforms. For a second, he’s at a loss for words, appalled by the heartbreaking news he just heard from his mother. And when he ends the call, he painfully looks at Y/N, tears filled his eyes, and she's now certain her feeling was correct.

“My stepdad, he...”

Harry cannot finish that sentence. He doesn’t have to, because she already knows what he’s going to say. Y/N quickly wraps her arms around Harry and his face falls to the crook of her neck. Just like that, she holds him tight, feeling her heart torn into pieces.

...

In losing a loved one, Y/N has a lot of empathy with Harry. She was in fifth grade when she lost her grandpa, whom she loved so much, even more than she did her parents sometimes. She was sitting in class and her teacher said her dad had come to pick her up early. It was not until Y/N got into her dad’s car did she find out her grandpa had passed away in the hospital. She was only ten, but it was the most pain she’s ever had to suffer. 

When you lose someone you love to death, you would always feel a gut-wrenching kind of pain. You would think about the last time you saw them and how you didn’t realize it would be the last, then you would toss and turn at night wishing your last words to them would’ve been ‘I love you very much’ instead of anything else.

So Y/N knows how hard this must be for Harry, who had to receive such a tragic news when he was away from home. She has to be there for him emotionally and physically. That’s why when he asked her to come with him to his hometown, she did not need to think twice.

“Hey guys!”

Y/N’s surprised to see Niall standing by Harry’s car, which parked outside the building. 

“Niall’s coming with us?”

“Yeah, Harry’s family is my family,” says Niall as he pats Harry on the back.

Y/N has never thought she would ever say this, but she’s glad Niall’s here. It’s great that Harry has a supportive friend like him. Right now, Y/N just wants her boyfriend to have all the love he needs. 

“Hi, sorry I’m late!”

Apparently, she spoke too soon.

Y/N looks at the girl who just arrives in a taxi and her eyes glint unwelcomingly. She doesn’t need a proper introduction to know who that is. That has to be Olivia. And for a strange feeling she cannot explain, Y/N is sure Olivia also knows who she is. The two girls just stare at each other without saying a word, and Harry has to break the silence.

“Gemma asked me to give Olivia a ride home with us, since she’s also close to my family.”

Y/N purses her lips, but nods understandingly still. Gemma doesn’t know what Olivia tried to do to their relationship, so it’s not Gemma’s fault. Besides, this is not about Y/N, or Olivia, it’s about Harry and his family. Whether she likes it or not, Y/N doesn’t have a say in this.

“I’m Niall, nice to meet you!” Niall goes in for a handshake with the blonde, who introduces herself and greets him with as much enthusiasm. Then Olivia turns to Y/N, the smile on her face is not sincere, it’s rather awkward and a bit uncomfortable.

“Um...Hey, you must be Y/N...” she offers her hand, but instead of shaking it, Y/N gives her a lopsided smile then turns to tell Harry, “let’s go!”

Harry knows it’s best if he stays quiet, so he walks around his car to get into the driver seat, and Niall gets into the back right after. 

Y/N checks for the second time to make sure the flat key is still in her bag, but when she turns around, she sees Olivia reach out to open the door on the passenger side.

“Oh, sorry...You’re gonna sit at the front...Sorry.” She apologizes as soon as she receives a glare from Y/N. 

“It’s okay. I’m gonna sit with Niall.” Just like that, Y/N climbs into the back seat, making Olivia and the two men as anxious as ever. 

Now Olivia has no choice but to take the front seat next to Harry. The mood inside the car at this point just cannot get any worse. Y/N has her face turned to the window, arms crossed, clearly annoyed by the unwanted passenger Olivia, who cannot stop staring at Harry, who awkwardly starts the engine and looks like someone’s breathing down his neck. 

Niall gazes at each of them then decides for himself that, there’s no way he’s gonna spend four hours in this toxic environment.

“Harold, switch seats with me. I’ll drive,” he declares. 

Without waiting to be told twice, Harry opens the door and gets out immediately so Niall can take his place behind the wheel and he can join his girlfriend at the back.

When he climbs in, he gives Y/N a smile which she doesn’t return, not until he kisses her cheek and rests his head on her shoulder like a soft kitten. Niall sighs happily at the couple in the rear-view mirror and maneuvers his friend’s car away from the sidewalk. That leaves Olivia the only disconsolate person out of the four.

...

“Haz, do you think we should stop by Beth’s to get your mum her favorite brownies?” Olivia suggests when they’re just fifteen minutes away from Harry’s childhood home.

“I already asked mum, she just bought some this morning. Don’t worry,” Harry replies. 

Then Niall turns to Olivia and asks her who Beth is.

“Oh, Haz and I used to-”

“Harry used to work at her bakery,” Y/N interrupts Olivia midway, almost making Niall burst into laughter, but the look Olivia gives him instantly changes his mind. 

On another note, Harry’s just amused. It’s not like Y/N to be rude to anyone, even herself knows that. Still she believes, sometimes, when you’re pushed to a limit, you have to let people know they cannot mess with you.

“We’re here, guys!” Niall informs the other three when he slows down the car and pulls over in front of a big house with an equally large front yard. 

Contrary to how chill Niall and Olivia is (because they’ve been here before), Y/N grabs onto her boyfriend’s arm when they get out of the vehicle, utterly astonished by the sight in front of her.

“You didn’t tell me you were rich,” she whispers as they walk behind Niall and Olivia up the paver steps leading to his front door.

“I am not!” Harry breathes out a laugh.

“Are you kidding? My house is half the size of yours and I grew up in a family of five!”

“Okay, relatively rich.”

“Man, I hate you.” Y/N grins and rolls her eyes.

...

"Thank you for being here, all of you. This means a lot to our family.”

Harry’s mother looks at each person at the dining table, sadness clouds her features but for her children she tries to hide it behind a false smile. Harry’s sitting on her right and Gemma on her left, both are holding their mother’s hand. It’s just a simple gesture, nothing unusual, but Y/N notices it and she cannot stop thinking about it. Because that family bond is everything she’s ever wanted for her own.

“You alright, baby?” Harry’s question causes Y/N to snap out of her thought. She quickly reassures him that she’s fine, didn’t even realize she completely zoned out for a couple seconds. 

“Thank you for having us, Anne. I really miss your cooking.”

“Aww, here, Niall sweetie, have some more chicken.”

“Mum! You’re gonna choke him with that much food!”

“Well, someone’s gotta eat that, and it’s definitely not gonna be you, innit Gemma?” 

Gemma jokingly sneers at Niall’s comment, which makes Anne laugh. This is the first time she’s genuinely laughed ever since Y/N first met her, and for some unknown reason, the young girl feels warmth in her heart. It’s been so long since she last enjoyed such a homely family dinner. Though these people aren’t even her family, she likes to pretend that they are, the thought of which puts a smile on her face.

“And Y/N dear.” Y/N flinches slightly when Anne calls her name. “Just make yourself at home, yeah? Think of us as your family.”

Y/N’s eyes twinkle when she mumbles a ‘thank you’, she might not show it, but after hearing Anne say that she’s now floating on a cloud.

“Ooooh, now that baby Harry finally brought a girl home, let’s discuss his embarrassing childhood, shall we!” 

“Oh come on! Gemma!” Harry cries out, making the whole table laugh. “Leave me alone!”

“I’ll start! Harry peed his pants every night until second grade,” Gemma says quickly, causing Harry to almost fall off his chair.

“That is not true! Cover your ears, Y/N!” Harry tells his girlfriend who simply chuckles and fondly pats him on the cheek. 

For the next ten minutes, The Styles siblings make a few other jokes about each other and every one at the table is drowning in laughters, the gloomy and depressing atmosphere previously in the room has all been washed away. 

That is until Anne notices something is off.

“Olivia, you’re awfully quiet tonight,” she suddenly mentions, making everyone turn their heads to the bewildered blonde haired girl.

“Oh, sorry. I’m just...tired...from the road trip,” she finally speaks.

“Did you spend a lot of time with Harry?”

Gemma’s question makes Niall crack up but he immediately apologizes when Harry kicks him under the table.

“Uh...Yeah, you can say that,” Olivia replies, carefully eyeing Harry. 

Unfortunately, he’s not even looking at her. 

...

Though Anne doesn’t suspect a thing, Gemma can sense something isn’t right about her brother's relationship with Olivia. That’s why, after dinner, she pulls him into the kitchen for a quick interrogation. Harry, having no other choice, tells her exactly what happened and doesn’t forget to call himself an asshole and an idiot so his sister doesn’t have to do that job.

“Damn right you’re an asshole and an idiot!” 

Well, never mind... 

“Holy shit, I cannot believe you and Olivia....ugh! Now I can’t even look at her the same way!”

“Shh, can you keep it down? Mum cannot know about this!”

“Mum would kill you if she knew!”

“It doesn’t matter anymore. I ended that relationship with Olivia on the day she left. I just wouldn’t think...”

“What? That the girl who gave her virginity to you would end up having feelings for you? What a surprise!”

“It was a surprise! We made a deal that it wouldn’t be a romantic relationship.”

“Harry!” Gemma huffs. “Everyone knew she had a crush on you! You were just too oblivious to see that!”

“Why didn’t anyone tell me then?”

“Because all of us knew you didn’t feel the same way and telling you would only ruin the friendship.” Gemma scrunches up her face. “All of us, including Olivia.”

Harry wants to say something else to defend himself. But he knows he cannot come up with a good argument, especially after all the things Gemma said. 

Gemma tells her brother to think about it, then heads back to her room, leaving him standing there alone, with his head down and back against the kitchen counter. 

That is when Olivia shows up. Her voice catches him by surprise.

“Haz?”

Harry looks up to meet two blue eyes gazing at him. 

“Can we talk?” she asks.

“Sure,” he answers.

Olivia crosses her arms in front of her chest and awkwardly takes a few steps forward, still she leaves an appropriate distance between the two of them, guessing it might make him uncomfortable if she gets too close, especially after what happened.

“I know it’s weird to even look at me now...” she begins, eyes staring at the floor. “So I want to apologize...I cannot remember much from that night, except for me trying to...you know...I just...I wouldn’t do that on purpose. I didn’t want to hurt you, Haz.”

“It’s okay. You were clearly drunk, and...I’m also sorry, I shouldn’t have come over.”

Olivia nods once, still not making eye contact with her friend as she whispers underneath her breath, loud enough for him to hear, “we can’t go back to the way things were before I left, can we?”

She’s not looking for an answer, that is her own realization. And Harry’s silence says it all. If he could he would still want to be her friend, yet he knows it’d be unfair for Olivia if he asked her to pretend like she only saw him as a normal friend, knowing for her, it’d always been more than that.

“I’m leaving tomorrow after Robin’s funeral, I already booked my plane ticket. I just thought you might be too occupied then to say goodbye, so...this is goodbye, I guess...”

“Uhm...I’ll miss you, Ollie.”

The corners of her mouth quirks up as she tells him she’ll miss him too. 

For the last time, before going to bed, Olivia asks Harry if he can give her one final honest answer, to which he agrees without hesitation.

“If you hadn’t met Y/N, do you think you would’ve considered the possibility of us?”

“Ollie, the truth is,” Harry hates to break her heart, but he’s decided this is something his friend deserves to know. 

“The truth is, before I met Y/N I’d never considered the possibility of being with anyone,” he admits. “I know that’s not what you want to hear, but-”

“That’s what I need to hear, thank you.” Olivia gives him a half-smile. “Good night, Haz.”

“Good night, Ollie.”

Harry watches Olivia turn her back and walk out of the kitchen, trying to ignore the melancholy feeling in his heart as he realizes, this may be their very last conversation.

...

Harry thinks he might never get used to saying goodbye, despite how many times he’s said it before, either it’s to a person, a habit, or a relationship. It’s always the same heavy-hearted feeling, every single time.

In the car returning home from the funeral, Harry lets his mother cry on his shoulder, then remembers the happy tears at her wedding with his late stepfather Robin. He watches Gemma and Olivia share a hug, then remembers the three of them lying to their parents to sneak out on a beautiful summer night. He gives Olivia one final smile before she gets into the taxi, then remembers the look on her face when he gave her an ice cream the first time they met.

That’s when Harry learns, what makes goodbye so terrible isn’t only the fact that you have to adjust to a life without that specific person, habit, or relationship, but also how you’re gonna miss the good memories you once had with them in your life. 

Now as he’s driving home and Niall’s asleep in the backseat, Harry steals a glance at his beautiful girlfriend, who’s too busy humming her favorite song to notice. And it occurs to him suddenly, after everything they’ve gone through together, saying goodbye to her would forever ruin him.

“I feel so bad for leaving right after the funeral...Gosh if we didn’t have an exam tomorrow, we could skip all lectures to stay with your mum. She was so heartbroken,” Y/N tells Harry as she opens the door to their flat and walks inside, followed by her boyfriend.

“Yeah, luckily Gemma’s staying. I’m gonna call mum tonight to make sure she’s alright.”

“Yeah, you should. Maybe next time we can stay longer.” 

“Y/N, I love you.”

Y/N’s a bit taken aback by the sudden affection but she doesn’t mind at all. “I love you too, baby.”

Her eyes twinkle when she steps forward to kiss Harry gently on the lips. Their eyes meet as they pull away and he tucks her hair behind her ears, and for the way she bites her lip, he just has to kiss her again. 

“I know ‘forever’ is a fancy word, but let’s try to stay together for as long as possible, okay?”

Y/N stares at Harry, her eyebrows draw together, making him nervous.

“What’s wrong?” he concerns.

“I mean, if you think about it, we only need to stay together until we graduate and get a decent job. I just don’t want to pay double the rent.”

Harry’s eyes go round, and his honest expression makes Y/N throw her head back, laughing hysterically. 

“I was joking! Jesus, you should’ve seen your face!”

“Oh so is this funny to you?” His brows rise when he questions. Without warning, Harry picks her up effortlessly and throws her over his shoulder, holding onto her legs and her bum to keep her in place. Y/N’s yelling at her boyfriend to put her down, and that she’s really sorry and she wants to take that back.

“Too late for that now, baby,” he says while heading to his bedroom with a screaming/laughing girl on his shoulder. “You’re gonna pay for making fun of me.”