#these greeks were wild

[smythologies]

Bro What The Actual Fuck Ep 1

Ok I'm gonna start another mini series about how fucked up myths are! I'm calling it

Bro what the actual fuck

As a warning, this series will contain some triggering material, as mythology is, unfortunately, really fucked up. I'll try my best to preface any specific triggering portions beforehand, by saying (TW: [trigger]), and then following it by the triggering content in these brackets: {}, but I just want to make this clear from the start

So I'll start the series off with the one everyone knows: Greco-Roman mythology. Always nice to do a classic, right?

So where do I begin?

How about Zagreus, who was the (TW: SA, !nc3st) {r@p3 child of Persephone and Zeus}, though in some versions its Hades and Persephone.

Yes, Zeus made the beast with two backs with (TW: !nc3st) {his dear daughter, Persephone}, and had a young child, Zagreus. Unfortunately Zagreus was later killed, sliced up by daddy Kronos, if memory serves correctly, though it may have been other Titans instead. Gods can’t die, though, so his spirit remains, and eventually he’s reborn as Dionysus, the son of Semele and Zeus. Fun fact, this is why, in earlier myths, Dionysus isn't considered a demigod from birth, but instead more of a Earth-born God, because he's the "reincarnation", so to speak, of Zagreus.

Speaking of Persephone, girlie has had a pretty fucked up life. She was (TW: SA) {r@p3d by her own father}, and was then possibly (TW: kidnapping) {abducted by her uncle Hades with Zeus’ help}, though some versions said she happened on the Underworld by accident, or went willingly with Hades. She was then maybe force-fed 3 pomegranate seeds, though some versions say she ate them on purpose, having fallen in love with Hades, while others say she ate them by accident, resulting in her having to spend 3 months. This is actually how we have the seasons; fall is the three months when Demeter is dreading Persephone leaving her, winter is the three months in which Persephone has left Demeter, and spring and summer are the total six months when Persephone has returned from the Underworld. 

There are also a lot of other fucked up stuff, most of it done by Zeus (TW: SA) {r@p!ng random women in weird ways}. He turned into a bull for Europa (thus fathering three sons, including Minos of Crete), he turned into a swan for Leda (thus fathering many children, including Helen of Troy and Castor and Polydeuces), he turned into a motherfucking golden raincloud for Danaë (thus fathering Perseus). He also changed himself to look like random men to sleep with their wives, for example, he turned into Amphitryon, Alcmene's husband, and fathered Herakles with her. Zeus also did the nasty with a lot of Titans and nymphs, thus fathering a lot of gods and goddesses.  Honestly, it’s become a TikTok trend to say this, but Zeus really was a fucking manwhore. Of course, there are possible social reasons for this, but that’s a different topic.

Greek mythology gets far, far worse, too. The Minotaur was born when Poeidon sent a majestic white bull to Crete for Minos to sacrifice, but Minos thought it was too beautiful to kill, so he sacrificed a different bull (rookie mistake dude). Poseidon got pissed, so he enchanted Minos’ wife, Pasiphae, to fall in love with the bull, and she convinced the royal inventor, Daedalus, to make her a bull-suit to seduce the bull and get busay with it. Then the Minotaur was born and locked in a labyrinth, courtesy of Daedalus. 

Then there’s also Pelops and Hippodamia. When Persephone was abducted, Demeter became (TW: mental illnesses) {depressed and distraught}, and she was invited by Tantalus to a dinner. Tantalus, wanting to test the omniscience of the gods, (TW: cannibalism) {murdered and cut up his son Pelops, and sered him to the gods}. Most of the gods realized what was happening, except for poor Demeter, who accidentally (TW: cannibalism) {ate Pelops’ shoulder}. The gods eventually revived Pelops, and Hephaestus made him a new shoulder. Pelops then went out to find a wife, and came across Hippodamia. The fucked up part here is that Hippodamia’s father, Oenomaus, was (TW: !nc3st) {in love with his daughter}, and so he challenged all potential suitors to run away from the old king with Hippodamia while he chased them on his magical chariot, saying that he’d kill the suitors if he caught them, Pelops had his own magical chariot, but he also bribed Oenomaus’ charioteer to allow him to (TW: SA, kinda) {have sex with Hippodamia} if Pelops won. Of course, Pelops managed to beat and kill Oenomaus in the end, and then also killed the charioteer (how sweet of him), so I guess that’s nice?

Of course there’s WAYYY more, but I think this is a good enough place to stop for now. Sorry for this long ass post, and I hope this wasn’t too fucked up for you guys! Have a great day!

[mythology-void]

If Percy rated the Greek gods

Zeus: 4/10 tried to kill me several times but did make Thalia and my bro Jason

Hera: -10/10 erased my memories and hates my girlfriend

Posideon: 100/10 that's my pabby

Demeter: 7/10 seems pretty chill, wanted me to eat cereal so she cares about my nutritional wellbeing I guess

Ares: 0/10 tried to fight me when I was twelve, very aggressive

Athena: 6/10 helpful I guess but really scary when you date her daughter

Mr. D: 5/10 useful when you need to kill a couple giants but keeps getting my name wrong

Apollo: 3/10 horrible haikus (he's literally the god of poetry) and can't drive but points for character development I guess

[vaguelyhumanshapedbeing]

I fucking love Diogenes so much. Whenever people talk about Greek philosophy it’s always the image of the “wise strong man in the toga preaching in his marble college to a gathering of men who look like younger versions of himself, debating the meaning of life and always maintaining the utmost sophistication and civility,” but then there’s Diogenes. My main man lived in a barrel in the marketplace, with a wooden bowl being his only possession (until he got rid of it because he saw a child drink water with his hands), and frequently pissed, defecated, and masturbated in public. But on the other hand, he was still a genius philosopher, frequently standing head to head with all sorts of major names in Greek philosophy. It’s like seeing a homeless man in the streets of San Francisco wearing the most disheveled outfit imagineable walking around casually deciphering the meaning of life and human existence, then promptly pissing on passerby. Just an absolute wild gigachad.

[hood-ex]

If you don't mind the ask, where in Montana were you at? I'm a Billings local but have been going between Glacier, Yellowstone, Missouri Breaks, and Billings for work and just think it'd be funny if we crossed paths without knowing lol

I was in Ennis! I actually did stay in downtown Billings for a night back in May though! I ate at The Burger Dive for dinner and at Stella's Kitchen & Bakery for breakfast. I thought it was funny that the head chef of The Burger Dive was crowned "Burger Champion" at the World Food Championship. The burger I ate was an incredibly average burger 😭. I was like hmmm who judged that competition 😭.

I actually wanted to go back to Billings for an event this month, but I had to work, so I didn't end up going.

I spent more time in Bozeman and Butte. Was in West Yellowstone quite a few times as well. Also took day trips to Missoula, Helena, Deer Lodge, Jefferson City, Virginia City (which is only like 18 minutes from Ennis), and Dillon.

[fatestouch]

if i just so happened to add more muses to the royal au.... who would you wanna see

[whyoneartheven]

I just watched Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid and anyways my life will never be the same

[skyward-ventus]

I HUNDRED percent blame R*ck and the rest of the series for this but I did not really just read a part of this book about how they weren’t sure if they would be safe to come out at a camp RUN BY A GREEK GOD FOR CHILDREN OF GREEK GODS CHILDREN. Then kids finally seeing that it was a safe space. 

Like DIONYSUS runs this camp????????

But this really puts it into perspective that Nico was the only openly queer character in this series until TOA. And I remember people being nervous that Apollo wouldn’t even be canonically bisexual in it. 

[aluminia]

ROUND ONE

Bessy Argyraki is a singer, active since 1973. She represented Greece in Eurovision during 1977 and has apparently released an album in Japan that was a hit (toshihiko).

Manto Mavrogenous was a greek independence fighter in 1821. She was a wealthy woman who gave all her fortune for the cause and was awarded the rank of lieutenant general.

[durn3h]

Why is it that for a period of like 2000+ years, everyone just took greek philosophers as the final authority on everything? Like, yeah lots of these guys were absolutely brilliant, but pretty much all of their thoughts were just ideas and thought experiments, often built off of incorrect information obtained from some other thinker that was viewed as an authoritative source of truth. They did plenty of mixing and matching with their own knowledge and that of other civilization and there was lots of debate and differing ideas amongst their philosophers, but once they more or less fell out of power, their thoughts became the end all be all of western civilization in philosophy, religion, history, and science all the way until well into the Enlightenment and still hold massive sway to this day

[rivilu]

Ok the more i think about it the more it trips me out that Frankenstein's first edition was written before the greek revolution happened and the second just a year before independence (for southern greece only) was reached. WILD.

[rmelster]

Is J. K. Rowling a transphobe and a blatantly ignorant human being? Of course, SHE IS! Should we mislike her for that? Indeed WE SHOULD. Can we stop taking interest in her life? Definitely WE CAN. I have done myself, and very gladly. Should we recognise that her books have a bunch of stereotypes of race, weight, human nature and sexual orientation? SURELY. I am working on writing my own story and I am making all the steps necessary to avoid making patronising and mocking tropes. Should we unfollow her after she talked shit and spread misinformation a bit Immane? YES. YES WE CAN.

But burying all her works, as if her books were the beacon of evil and spoiling of youth? No. NO. NO.

I thought we had reached a reasonable degree of media literacy not to give the “even if the author is a pos, you can still admire their work” discourse, but yes. Do what you want? Expose how bad she truly is, if you wish, that’s between you and your inner Jiminy Cricket, but you cannot go around telling people that just because they are still attached to those books they are not properly celebrating / supporting Pride? NO.

Grownups can chose what they like, men, women, both, none… Or reading the Brothers Karamazov, Harry Potter, both, none. What makes you a grownup, among other things, is that you think straight and properly, not like a whinny child. And the refusal of this thought is not fitting of a supposed grownup, but of the latter. this post is giving ✨INTOLERANCE ✨

TRANS LIVES MATTER.

QUEERS LIVES MATTER.

PEOPLE DESERVE NOT TO BE REPRESENTED BY HARMFUL STEREOTYPES. SCREW JK ROWLING AND ALL THE TERFS AND TRANSPHOBES!

[arisveah]

not only were the ancient greeks fruity, but so was their architecture! i will not explain.

[literaryvein-reblogs]

yet another list of "beautiful" words

to try to include in your next poem/story

Book-bosomed - coined by Sir Walter Scott; means "carrying a book at all times." If you love books, certainly you've been book-bosomed at times in your life.

Caliginous - misty, dark

Dithyramb - a usually short poem in an inspired wild irregular strain. This word comes from the Greek word dithyrambos which was the name for a wild and irregular poem honoring Dionysus, the god of wine, who was often lauded throughout the year during festivals at which poems of this style were read.

Embonpoint - plumpness of person; stoutness

Farinaceous - having a mealy texture or surface

Farouche - marked by shyness and lack of social graces

Florilegium - a volume of writings; an anthology. The word was borrowed into English from a New Latin word that comes from Latin florilegus meaning "culling flowers." Think of a florilegium as a bouquet of writings, specially selected and arranged for your enjoyment.

Goety - black magic or witchcraft in which the assistance of evil spirits is invoked

Lachrymist - one given to weeping

Lamia - a female demon; vampire

Osseous - bony

Phantasmagoria - a bizarre or fantastic combination, collection, or assemblage

Stygian - extremely dark, gloomy, or forbidding

Tenebrous - shut off from the light

Theurgy - the art or technique of compelling or persuading a god or beneficent or supernatural power to do or refrain from doing something

If any of these words make their way into your next poem/story, please tag me, or leave a link in the replies. I would love to read them!

More: Lists of Beautiful Words ⚜ Word Lists

[specialagentartemis]

in middle school during my Intense Greek Mythology Phase, Artemis was, as you can likely guess, my best girl. Iphigenia was my OTHER best girl. Yes at the same time.

The story of Iphigenia always gets to me when it's not presented as a story of Artemis being capricious and having arbitrary rules about where you can and can't hunt, but instead, making a point about war.

Artemis was, among other things--patron of hunting, wild places, the moon, singlehood--the protector of young girls. That's a really important aspect she was worshipped as: she protected girls and young women. But she was the one who demanded Agamemnon sacrifice his daughter in order for his fleet to be able to sail on for Troy.

There's no contradiction, though, when it's framed as, Artemis making Agamemnon face what he’s doing to the women and children of Troy. His children are not in danger. His son will not be thrown off the ramparts, his daughters will not be taken captive as sex slaves and dragged off to foreign lands, his wife will not have to watch her husband and brothers and children killed. Yet this is what he’s sailing off to Troy to inevitably do. That’s what happens in war. He’s going to go kill other people’s daughters; can he stand to do that to his own? As long as the answer is no—he can kill other people’s children, but not his own—he can’t sail off to war.

Which casts Artemis is a fascinating light, compared to the other gods of the Trojan War. The Trojan War is really a squabble of pride and insults within the Olympian family; Eris decided to cause problems on purpose, leaving Aphrodite smug and Hera and Athena snubbed, and all of this was kinda Zeus’s fault in the first place for not being able to keep it in his pants. And out of this fight mortal men were their game pieces and mortal cities their prizes in restoring their pride. And if hundreds of people die and hundred more lives are ruined, well, that’s what happens when gods fight. Mortals pay the price for gods’ whims and the gods move on in time and the mortals don’t and that’s how it is.

And women especially—Zeus wanted Leda, so he took her. Paris wanted Helen, so he took her. There’s a reason “the Trojan women” even since ancient times were the emblems of victims of a war they never wanted, never asked for, and never had a say in choosing, but was brought down on their heads anyway.

Artemis, in the way of gods, is still acting through human proxies. But it seems notable to me to cast her as the one god to look at the destruction the war is about to wreak on people, and challenge Agamemnon: are you ready to kill innocents? Kill children? Destroy families, leave grieving wives and mothers? Are you? Prove it.

It reminds me of that idea about nuclear codes, the concept of implanting the key in the heart of one of the Oval Office staffers who holds the briefcase, so the president would have to stab a man with a knife to get the key to launch the nukes. “That’s horrible!,” it’s said the response was. “If he had to do that, he might never press the button!” And it’s interesting to see Artemis offering Agamemnon the same choice. You want to burn Troy? Kill your own daughter first. Show me you understand what it means that you’re about to do.

[catsconflictscopicsandchamomile]

Just almost tripped over some rosewood branches I have lying about for Art Reasons and my legit first thought was "oh geez, stray sticks... or is that 'oh Styx, stray Jesus?"

[celesterayel]

something out of my dreams | luke castellan

pairing : luke castellan x dionysus!reader

request: could you possibly write a luke x daughter of dionysus please? maybe she’s like super nice and when percy gets to camp she becomes like an older sister and luke is super whipped for her? @elz-zalarrr

IN WHICH — all he knows is that you were something out of his dreams.

"trust him like a brother, yeah, you know i did one thing right. starry eyes sparkin' up my darkest night" - t.s.

w.c. 1.8k

warning(s) : cheesiness ゜✭・.

✩ ‧₊˚ author's note okay i've begun to realize that low-key i feel like i write in cursive if that makes sense? if a feeling could describe it i'd say its like using poetry to write? that's likely not any better lol :)

there was but one person that everyone could agree they adored at camp half blood.

it didn't matter what grudge who had with whom or what ancient rivalries transcended the ideals of reality, everyone loved you. not the typical type of brittle love that crumbled at the slightest of touches, but pure adoration that endured the sands of time.

you with the gentle soul, who healed others with each laugh and smile. when new half-godlings were brought to camp, you made sure to comfort them and make them understand that they belonged here and would find a home whether they wanted to or not. you made sure that no birthday was forgotten, no deed undone.

children of minor gods or elders, of Ares or Aphrodite, you became an older sister to all who needed you. you, the daughter of fertility and chaos, the god dionysius.

there was no debate that at camp half blood there was only a before you and an after you. you were like that high right before the free fall–invincibility and smoke and curiosity wrapped into the form of a demi-god. you were the gentle breeze during summer nights when the heat became too much. and none ached more to feel it than luke castellan, who had been burning for as long as he knew.

your relationship in itself was tentative, you danced around your feelings–scared one wrong touch or word would break the shaky, fine line that lay between you two. but you could not hide the way you loved the other to yourselves nor the children of the beings of divine blood. 

luke castellan loved you like the stars would fall out of the sky with one harsh touch, free and incandescently self-destructive. like you were a wild, wonderful thing out of a fantasy.

you loved him like there was no hell or heaven but the cosmos that lay in his eyes and the worlds that lay in his soul. something so sacred and rare. a love so true and mortal it put all the greek tragedies to shame. 

you knew that whatever you and him were made of, in every lifetime or the next you two were made for each other. 

loving luke castellan would be both your redemption and destruction in the making, your elysium for whatever good thing you had done in your previous life. 

✩ ‧₊˚

you first met percy jackson when he came to camp, he was a scared little thing who had just lost his mother when the veil between reality and deception flickered. everything he’d known came crumbling as quickly as the truth was uncovered: gods and monsters were real and played games of hell and heaven on earth. some thing about him called out to the vulnerability you once knew when you first came to camp so you made it your mission to be the sister he never had. 

you met him at the front of the steps of the main office, “my name is y/n, percy jackson. welcome to camp halfblood.”

“do you just somehow know everyones name,” he raised his eyebrows at you. 

“yes.” no, but you supposed it’d be fun to let him think that. 

“of course you do.”

“come along, i’ll show the ins and outs here. if you're nice enough, i might let you in on the cook's secret stash of blue ice cream,” you laughed out.

he contemplated his choices before grabbing your outstretched hand and shaking it, “deal.”

you showed him who to avoid and the best people to befriend. the history between your kind and why the gods were as they were. the truth behind his bloodline and the legacy that he was now responsible for. the tribulations and the pain that was cursed to follow the children of the gods. 

“and this is chris. the best person to ask if you need to know what plants are poisonous,” you say, introducing him to a guy with black hair and soft eyes. 

percy looks at chris before looking around to see where the hermes boy is, “we’ve met. he was with luke when he was showing me around”

you’re cheeks heated at the mention of his name; looking around to see if you can spot the familiar tan skin and soft eyes that belong to your luke. 

“oh! luke! yeah, he’s around here somewhere. he’s sly like that, wandering and then popping up the next second.”

a voice pipes up behind you suddenly, “y/n, already telling percy everything about me?” 

you whirl around and there he stands in all his glory with the curls you love and the sun in his eyes. your golden boy.

“just telling him the truth, castellan. you’re hard to get a hold of sometimes.”

a hue of pink covers his cheeks, “i’m never far from you.”

both of you oblivious to percy and chris who seem to be conversing about you both and the tip-toe dance you play. 

percy just wonders what’s happening here: firstly, luke is looking at you like you’ve hung the moon and the stars and that’s saying something because he has shit observation skills–his analysis essays can attest to that. secondly, he swears he can see hearts in his eyes from where he’s standing and is that…is that a blush?

he turns to chris, who is just staring at the two like it's not out of the normal for what’s happening, “what’s happening here? is he blushing?”

chris just nods, “yeah. luke’s kinda–very obviously to everyone–in love with y/n. if i didn’t know better i’d say she’s gotten him insane in love. very likely as her dad’s the god of insanity.”

he turns back to the two who are laughing and standing closer than before, “like super, super in love. if there was a word for love, luke’s found it”

“huh.” 

chris says it like it’s common knowledge like how the best food is blue jelly beans, “i mean i ship it, y/n’s the sweetest person around here–the type of person people write songs about. she’s like a sister to us older ones and a mother to the younger ones. the whole camp is waiting for him to just man up and ask y/n. they make each other happy, you know?”

“yeah, i think i do.” 

percy thinks it’s something the poets would write about.

✩ ‧₊˚

fridays are capture the flag days.

you’re not the type of person to engage in these types of games all that often but you suppose there’s a first time for everything. someone’s got to show the percy boy how it’s played. 

“okay, percy. remember, keep your senses open and make sure that no one gets close enough to engage. once they engage, it’s hard to fight them off.”

all around you two, people have begun to don their armor and raise arms. the sun has just reached its height and you’re huddled together discussing your gameplan. even though your cabin house is pretty small, you’ve joined athena and hermes for this game. 

percy’s voice rises a little high as he tries swinging his sword around only to drop it, “yeah, okay. i’ll just try not to die, i guess. that’s not like hard or anything.”

“just follow my lead and if i’m not here find luke.”

you're not exactly excited about percy’s odds. the kid is lanky as is and his sassiness doesn’t help him out much when others target him for it. 

that’s exactly why you’re gone to his rescue when he nearly gets hit in the face by a spear after he insulted one of the boys from house ares. 

your heel nearly buckles under a sharp hit after you block the attack that’s directed to percy. you manage to reset your heel and push the sword off before you drop down into a crouch and sweep the legs of the warrior in front of you.

unfortunately you're slightly too focused on what’s in front of you and protecting percy you don’t realize that someones charging toward you from the side. 

fortunately, a block from a familiar sword stops any attack that might meet you head on. no sooner do you hear the block that luke’s got the other guy on the floor and surrendering. 

you grin at him, “i had that handled.”

giving you that grin that makes you feel like your future's right in front of you, he replies: “i’m sure you did. but why let you deal with him when i can save you the trouble.” 

“why don’t you go and help annabeth win the games, romeo.”

he gives you a wink, throwing a quick ‘yes ma’am’ before he’s already running off again. 

no sooner than later, a quick gong resounds throughout the camp, concluding the games. you’re standing slightly battered while percy walks behind you pointing out all the flowers he’s found. you definitely need to teach him how to defend himself. 

the players are just trickling in for the woods they’ve been fighting in to reband together and in the distance you see a figure running toward you. 

holding onto the flag, he continues to look at you like you’re everything he’s ever needed to breathe. he’s taken his helmet off and you can finally see him fully: brown eyes and all dimples.

“see you’ve found the flag.”

he takes a couple of steps closer to you until only two steps separate him and you, “yeah, someone told me to go win the game so I did just that for her”.

“really now?”

he whispers, “yeah.” 

his eyes twinkle and you’ve never wanted anything more than to continue to stare at them. 

you hope he’ll make the next move but luke castellan, the boy you’ve fallen for in every lifetime, is always content to admire you.

so, you take those two next steps, grab him by his neck, and press your lips to his. 

he stands shocked for a minute, wondering if what’s happening is really happening. but no sooner, he’s dropped the flag on the grass and holds you like your the greatest treasure he’s ever had.

there’s a certain type of tragedy that your golden boy tastes like, fire and freedom all in this moment. it’s the price of redemption and damnation that you’re willing to pay. 

to him, it’s the stars aligning like you’d will them to–the power you held and every thing he’s ever needed. your his past, future, and present: the threads in his life giving him the one thing he’s ever wanted. something he’s only ever dreamed of. 

he pulls back slightly before murmuring, “in every lifetime or the next, i am yours. i don’t know what i did to deserve you. you’re something only out of my dreams, y/n.”

"you sap"

you just kiss him again, ignoring all the campers and those still trickling in. 

✩ ‧₊˚

“definitely a child of dionysius. she’s reduced him to insanity,” pipes up percy as he tears off the petals of the flower he holds in his hand. 

chris just grabs a flower and continues to rip the petals off like the boy beside him. 

“damn straight!” shouts luke toward the two.