#these dumb ass repressed bitches

[the-everqueen]

hey! just popping in to ask, how’s the gay coworkers au going? could we perhaps get a hint as to what’s to come? 👀

i almost said "it's going!" which is less than true because LA guard dog and wereverse have been getting all my words this month (or at least the words that aren't going into article revisions). pero i'm really excited about the next bit of gay coworkers because as someone who adored Nick Robles' art in the waking hours run but hated how the story resolved...well! let's just say i am tackling the problem of Ruin and what he signifies for Coco. >:)

[yanderestarangel]

✏ anon request: "Can you write something about smoke holding back his desires because he doesn't want to be pushy or selfish but the reader tells him to let loose? Like a sub!tomas to a rough dom!tomas"

- - - -

TW: hard!dom tomas, sexual fantasies, fetishes, daddykink, breed!kink, spit on mouth, v!sex, blowjob - deep throat, rough sex, dub con, hunter!play, primitive sex, size!kink, bare sex, degradation, oral (f!re), nicknames, ftm!reader, extreme!smut, nsfw, bites, afab anatomy, power play, part.1.

♡ - Tomas has so much built-up lust that it literally physically hurts the poor guy. He was always repressed in many aspects - whether sexual or sentimental - throughout his years of life, he was always the younger brother, the sweet and kind man, the ninja who helped everyone... But even though he repressed his thoughts even more of dominance, inside, something inside the Slav was something more primitive, desires that he could never let out.

♡ - However, you soon entered his life, and to make matters worse, his desires increased even more. He tried to masturbate so he wouldn't take it out on you, but every time he saw you, he just wanted to bend you over the nearest surface and fill you to the brim with his cum, while turning you into a dumb, quivering mess for him. The first few times you had sex were also calmer, with Tomas afraid of hurting you, and not penetrating you, just letting you have fun with his cock, whether sucking it or just rubbing your pussy over his thick length - like I already wrote in another headcanon, Smoke is a guy with an 8-inch dick, in addition to being an extremely muscular man, who can easily break you in half for several reasons - so he just settles for having your orgasm, but from the moment when you tell him to just let go and take everything out on you... This man becomes a hungry beast.

♡ - Tomas will start to be rougher, starting with oral sex. Before, when he was still repressing himself from being a submissive, he would just give calm and peaceful licking and fingering, however, now he will suck your pussy, ordering you to ride his face, slapping your ass and squeezing your breasts - if you you have - while deliciously degrading you, the ninja's husky voice against your sensitive skin, placing your clit between his teeth lightly, making you jump and squirm. "-I've been wanting this, dreaming about fucking you like this, feeling your tight pussy squeezing my tongue like that. You're driving me crazy, baby, you're my whore, aren't you?" he would grunt as he motivated you to rub even more of your wetness against him, you couldn't help but let out a loud squeal, feeling the change in the power dynamic between the two of you, before Vrbada only showered you with affectionate nicknames but now, he treated you like a cheap slut and you.... Loved that.

Tomas has several fetishes, and after the first time you authorize him, he will use them all on you, whether they are:

♡ BREEDING!KINK ♡ With him fucking you raw, the skin on skin drove him crazy, he turned into a mf smug while he had one hand on your neck and the other holding your waist, pounding your pussy roughly, affectionately calling you "my little breeding slut" filling your little pussy with his hot and thick cum, the feeling becomes uncomfortable as he cums inside you so much, but he tells you to squeeze your thighs and not let any drops fall, after all, you are the good boy from him. "-Just keep those pretty thighs closed ok? Yes my pretty bitch, you're a good boy, and good boys close their pussies when told to... I want to see you filled with my kids."

♡ DADDYKINK ♡ Tomas has always had the need to feel in control, so for you to call him "Daddy" while he's so rough, abusing your holes is so amazing to him. He will just use your favorite nicknames while he fucks your throat - forcing you to deep throat him, as he quickly takes his member out of your mouth leaving a burning sensation in your throat, tears running down your face, making the tall man smile and rub the dick in your cheek, hitting the member in your face and returning to the heat of your tongue. "-Oh fuck... Keep sucking daddy's cock will you? You can handle that, can't you? You're just my stupid boy, my cockslave' so beautiful and so needy, just like a good slut would be."

♡ HUNTER!PLAY ♡ Smoke will use his talents as a Hunter to hunt you, an aggressive and primitive sex, with you being his prey - like a lost deer, being sought after by a hungry wolf - he will give you a five-minute advantage to run through the forest, the The sun was setting while you tried to run away... But you knew it was inevitable, and that made you even wetter, after all your boyfriend warned you that the further you went, the rougher he would fuck you. He knew exactly where you were, throwing you to the ground and pinning your neck with his biceps against the dry leaves - his blue eyes shone with a primal hunger and he practically salivated, pulling his already hard cock out of his pants. Smoke held your face, forcing you open your mouth and spitting inside. "-Swallow it my dirty little slut... And get ready, I'm going to fuck you until you can barely mouth my fucking name." He will cover your mouth, isolating your sounds as he fucks you into oblivion, sucking your breasts and leaving you totally marked with bites.

♡ SIZE!KINK ♡ He loves seeing the bulge that builds up in your womb as he continually shoves his cock into your overstimulated hole, placing one of his hands to feel how big it is, and how much it is bouncing inside your little womb. "-Do you feel that? You're taking my cock like a champ, boy... My slutty baby boy just wants me to destroy you... Damn you're a pretty, naughty little thing." Tomas fills you repeatedly with his cum, the feeling of being bigger and stronger than you, being able to break you in half at any moment was intoxicating for him, carrying you all over the house and lifting you in his arms, making you cum and squirt in the his cock several times, and he won't stop, until he sees you limp and about to pass out on his lap, after all, you asked for it.

𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒔 𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒗𝒆𝒅 ©𝒚𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒍 2024. 𝒅𝒐 𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒄𝒐𝒑𝒚, 𝒓𝒆𝒑𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒔𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒆.

[awfulalignmentcharts]

what the f%#$ does ____ mean on that stupid ass ship chart

saw a few questions, so ask (the air) and ye shall receive.

top section

"describe their vibe" — you can interpret this at will. it's just a space to put whatever you think encapsulates the vibes of their dynamic/them as a relationship. it can be like a list of tropes, a dumb tweet screenshot, some other type of image, anything really.

everything else should be straightforward lmao.

rest of the shit below the cut so i don't take up your dash space.

continuums section

"repressed vs (sexually) open" — as it sounds. repressed as in like they're a prude or open as in they're down to bang on the regular.

"no libido vs terminally horny" — not horny to very horny lmao

"aggressively romantic vs allergic to PDA" — kinda like how private the character is/how embarrassed are they by the notion of displays of romance. do they prefer lowkey displays of romance or are they dramatic about it?

"(severely) mentally ill vs mentally stable" — fairly self-explanatory. are they full of mental problems or are they actually mentally sound?

"kms'ing over being in love vs blushing giggling twirling hair" — pretty much their reaction to being in love, specifically with the other person. do they hate the fact they love the other person, or are they super giddy that they're in love?

"doomed by the narrative vs blessed by the narrative" — it's a little open to interpretation but my usage of it for individual use is like how fucked over by the canon events are they individually? (if the relationship's doomed, they're probably both on the doomed end; if the relationship ISN'T doomed but one was severely fucked over by the story's events, then they could be in the doomed section while the other one could be hovering elsewhere)

"big spoon vs little spoon" — self-explanatory. it's cuddle time. who's the big spoon, who's the little spoon.

"the weapon vs the wielder" — ngl, this continuum may not actually work too well for some healthier ships, but the general vibe of it is like the weapon is the one who tends to do things at the wielder's behest. the weapon is commonly more of a warrior type, more of the "protector" (and may also have self-worth issues), while the wielder is the one that typically gets protected, may have a great deal of importance for some reason, and is sort of the "user" of the weapon. you're more than welcome to make your own interpretations of it lmao

the pyjamas — based on this image: (who's the sleepy old man with the candle that goes snork mimimimi vs the beautiful wife who's likely also a damsel in distress)

"jealous vs chill" — should be fairly self-explanatory, but like is the person chill with their partner, or do they easily get jealous when the attention isn't on them?

"has zero game vs insane game" — are they bitchless or can they pull bitches? regardless of charisma (or lack thereof), can they actually get laid or not

"functional vs soggy loser" — are they a functional member of society with their shit together or are they born-in-a-wet-cardboard-box, perpetually soggy, capital P Pathetic?

the other shit

"what brings them together?" — what are some reasons that this ship actually has grounds? what do they have going for their relationship?

"what is keeping them/kept them apart?" — were/are there any reasons why they haven't just kissed yet? what are those reasons?

"poorly describe their meetcute" — describe how they met but be funny about it.

"list their reductive fandom tropes/fandom appeal" — reasons why people might ship them or like the ship. (e.g. enemies to lovers, angel and demon dichotomy, etc.)

"who's the armrest?" — two guys. one likes to turn the other into an armrest by sticking their arm on the other's shoulder (or something; done possibly with the intent to annoy). who's the one that's being used as the armrest more often?

"who's the headrest?" — two guys. one puts their head on the other more frequently. who's the one that's more often turned into a head rest?

"who fell first?" — who fell in love first?

"who fell harder?" — who fell in love harder?

"who cooks" — should be obvious lmao

"who cleans up more messes?" — can be literal messes, or who more often deals with the fallout of the bullshit one of them gets up to.

"who's the bigger yearner?" — who yearns more?

"who confessed first?" — should be literal.

touch

should be fairly self-explanatory, but it's kinda like what is or isn't off limits to contact of any form from the other person. say character A is entirely red while character B is entirely purple. A is allergic to any form of contact anywhere from B, while B fucking loves anything from A.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

girl like you 1

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such as kidnapping, marital discord, noncon/dubcon, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: a fight with your husband leads to an unexpected situation.

Characters: Lee Bodecker, Jake Jensen

Author’s Note: Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself. <3

"Marge," you struggle to keep the exasperation from your voice, "that's not how it works. It's a civil dispute, not criminal--" 

"They signed a contract," the blonde dictator bites back at you. 

"Right, and we're going through the appropriate channels to have there violations dealt with--" 

"Ugh, whatever," she throws the folder at you, "shoulda know better. I heard you never even passed the bar." 

You catch the file before the papers can flutter out. You scowl at her as she pushes her hands out in frustration and stomps her pink heel. You pinch your cheeks between your teeth. You never got to take the bar, you got married. Like her. Maybe you should ask about the dust on her English degree. 

"And that lipstick is tacky. It looks awful with your skin tone," she snarls as she rams a manicured nail in your direction, huffing and spin, taking off like a tornado towards the rest of the doll-like HOA clones. 

You look down as you shuffle the papers straight and shrug. You've never quite fit in. This place is like high school 2.0. You never have the right clothes or the right makeup, and no matter how much you primp, your hair just won't behave. You don't know why you bother. 

Well, it's something to do. A hobby in your mostly empty life. Brock promised you it wouldn't be like this. To his defence, you're the idiot who believed him. 

Your husband hasn't exactly kept his promises, has he? You leave through the gate, not bothering with the niceties. You're certain your dismissal was thoroughly witnessed. Besides, the meeting is as good as done. 

You wait by the curb, a text sent to Brock. Your feet kill in these slingbacks. You hate those as much as you hate the mascara that makes your lashes stick. 

The black car comes down the street and you open the door, dropping inside with a puff. You rest the folder in your lap and roll your eyes back against a repressed yawn. You shut the door and buckle your belt. 

"Hey, honey," you greet your husband. "How was your day?" 

"Busy," Brock answers curtly. 

"Oh, did you have dinner? I left it in the oven to reheat--" 

"Your my wife, you're the one who warms my dinner," he insists. 

Your nostrils flare and you look away. This is exactly what you dreaded the day you accepted that ring. All those years of schooling and you threw it away for an empty vow. 

"Alright, I'll turn the stove on when I get in--" 

"How was it? You're early. You didn't stay for drinks?" 

"I'm tired." 

"So? Five years and what do you have to show for it? Like I wanna hear about those dumb bitches at the barbecue? No, I wanna hear about my wife. About everything she's doing for the neighbourhood." 

"Don't talk like that," your murmur. If he thinks they're dumb, what does he think of you? 

"Don't tell me what to do," he snorts, "you know, you might be a little happier if you put in a little effort. Not like I don't bust my ass so you can buy nice dresses and yet you're still wearing this." 

He reaches over and tugs your skirt. It's one of your favourite dresses. You don't see an issue with it, other than it might be a bit past its prime. Besides, he does make a lot of money but you're the one who counts it and makes sure the bills get paid. There isn't room for you to buy Chanel. 

"Sorry," you mutter towards the window. 

"Don't be sorry, do better," he rolls the steering wheel as he rolls around the cul de sac. 

Your chest sinks and your lip twitches. Do better. You're tired of hearing that. You're tired of trying. You're just tired. 

"Stop the car," you demand as you sit up. 

"What?" He scoffs.  

"Stop the car and let me out--" 

"We're almost home." 

"I said let me out of the car," you snarl, "now!" 

He slams on the breaks so hard, you nearly smack into the dashboard. You hit the button on the seat belt and let it rebel. You grab the folder and throw it on the dash so the pages scatter. 

"You can turn a fucking dial," you snip and push the door open. 

He catches your arm, his grip tight and unbending, "where are you going?" 

"I don't know. Anywhere but here." 

"Don't be fucking stupid, get back in the car," he commands. 

"Let go!" 

"You're being stupid--" 

"Like always, right?" You spit at him and wriggle free, his nails scratching you hotly. "I'm done. I can't make you happy and I'm tired of trying." 

You get out and swing the door shut. You grip the strap of your purse, still hooked over your shoulder, and turn on your heel. You click down the sidewalk as he revs and jolts forward, following you. 

"Babe, get back in the car," he calls through the window. 

You ignore him and stomp on, nearly bending your ankle as you do. 

"Stop PMSing and get in the damn car!" He speeds up, almost driving past you, "don't make me tell you again." 

You keep quiet and march on. His brakes scrape to a halt and the car door opens and closes. You hear him behind you. You speed up to evade him. 

"You always gotta make everything a fucking task--" 

He grabs onto your purse and yanks you back, nearly knocking you on your ass. You cry out and face him, tugging on the bag as you play tug-of-war on the sidewalk. The sudden woop startles both of you and the purse drops to the ground.  

You look over as the cruiser pulls up. You know the car number and the face above the wheel. The same on that patrols the suburb. The HOA buys Sheriff Bodecker a special Christmas turkey every year and several other throughout to mark even the most redundant holidays. He's firmly in the pocket of the Stepford robots. 

"Everything okay over here?" Bodecker drawls as he rolls down his window.  

"Yes," Brock answers in tandem with your "no." 

Your husband sighs, "just a marital spat, sir, you know how it is." 

You grimace and shake your head. You pick up the purse as Brock looms close, "nothing to worry about Sheriff," you stand and swoop the bag over your elbow. "Thanks." 

"Babe," Brock says, "let's go home." 

"No," you retort and turn around, continuing on your way. 

You hear a footstep and another wail of the cruiser's siren, "sir, I'm gonna have to ask you not to follow the lady. She said no. She probably just needs to cool off." 

You shake your head and continue on. Brock's voice croaks but he can't summon words. He growls and backs off. 

As you continue down the block, tires slowly turn on the tarmac and you glance over at the sheriff keeps a light foot on the gas, "ma'am, you wanna get in? I'll take ya to the station to settle your mind." 

"It's fine, sheriff," you say, "thank you." 

"Now, miss, I don't mean to frighten you but I gotta," he insists, "I can't just drive off in case your husband decides to follow. I only wanna get you outta the way do he don't do anything dumb." 

"Sheriff, I--" you stop and your soles aches from the high arches of your shoes, "he wouldn't..." 

"Y'all were pretty heated back there," he says, "I'm not saying what would happen, but I'd feel better knowin' you're not wandering the streets alone." 

You chew your tongue and look back and forth. Brock watches from down the street, leaning on his car. You know he's just waiting for Bodecker to take off so he can do exactly what the policeman suggests. 

"Thank you, sir," you step towards the curb, "I appreciate that." 

"Anything for a good lady like yerself," he nods, "'fraid you're gonna have to ride piggy back though." 

He shifts into park and gets out. He opens the back door and you teeter at the edge of the pavement. You never pictured yourself in the back of a police car but it's preferable to the alternative. 

[happypotato48]

Wandee Goodday EP 2 Unhinged Tangent Thoughts

"Previously on Wandee Goodday Z. Doctor Wandee set his eyes on Mr. perfect Doctor Ter, but before the battle even starts our hero Dee got hit with the "I only like women." now after humiliated defeat, Dee rise up to meet his new challenger Yor-yak Phadetseuk. can our hero finally get to taste delicious victory or it he going to forever be consign to life of vanillaness. find out in this episode of Wandee Goodday Z!"

To zab or not to zab? an age old question, asks to themself by every repressed Homos that ever live.

Bitch! you just got offered free dick. and this hunk of a dick nonetheless. get off your high horse and go ride this bull of a man instead!

So you people probably figured this out by now. but yes Fluke is a really poppular thai boy name for millennials and gen z. i literally knew like 10+ different Flukes form just my school days alone.

Cher can you share your man with me. pretty please 🥺

Fuck you! how dare you wink your god dang eyebrow like that! เห็นใจคนไม่มีผัวหน่อยสิครับ.

Eyebrows!

Men, can't kill them, can't live without them.

Ok wtf, how is this dumb horny show give me the feels right now. Ohhhh those eyes, god damn those eyes. it's like staring into a hazy morning field touched by a gentle first daylight. i wish i could get lost in them forever..... anyway Hot man me likey!

I don't go there but Yak fursuit game is weak. forking amature smh.

Tank tops! hubba hubba. thank you show for putting all the men in tank tops. i will forever be in your debt.

No thank you. i really don't like this trope of a character getting saves from sa that so prevalent in BL and romance genre in general.

This man is a husband material, Dee. you better not break this poor man's heart. or i swear to all the lords of hell, i will bring down calamity on your ass.

Oh hello stereotypical gossipy gay. your kind was one of the first queer representations we got on thai tv. you walked so these BL boys could run, thank you for your service.

He's so beautiful. i love him and his magnificent eyebrows so much.

Cool grandma! i love her style so much. also loved that she asked Dee how the hell he still can't find a man. freaking savage.

จะเอาหัวเอาหางหรือจะเอากลางตลอดตัว ก็ได้จ่ะ.

"Moan harder" and "play with that longer" i'm fucking dead. this is so hot! ahhhh yessss i love this so much. this is how you do sexy. other BLs take some fucking notes!

This is so fucking tender. my heart is melted.

Oh my, this Ep whewwww. the tenderness expressed by Yak is something that i didn't know i needed, but i'm 100% loving every goddamn second of it. Great is such a great actor (pun intended.) and this version of Yak is already better than his book counterpart.

[myohmyimanxious]

Hazbin Hotel Headcanons bc I'm obsessed xoxo

(Some NSFW is implied/mentioned)

-Husk was there when alastor sold his soul to whomever it was

- He also has no trust is alastor whatsoever like he's terrified of him but he also wouldn't trust him for his life (literally)

- Angel has PTSD

- But he doesn't realise he has it, bc he represses feelings and everything

- Charlie and Angel have a sibling dynamic

- They're pain in the asses for vaggie and husk

- Charlie reminds angel of his sister molly

- He also doesn't really like to celebrate his birthday bc it's not the same without her (unless he's shit-faced drunk and won't remember)

- Vox will make his screen brighter or flicker to get and hold val's attention

- Angel is Husk's lucky charm in gambling moments

- Angel genuinely did love val in the beginning and thought val loved him too

- Whilst Alastor truly does believe that a smile is a both a way to control the situation and hide one's true intentions, his smile is stitched on and he physically cannot remove the stitches as it's part of his deal

- Alastor is colourblind in the same way deer are

- Angel knows what they said about him in Angel court and he plays it off but it really upset him

- Alastor was a serial killer in his life

- He was never caught though

- Alastor plays static when actively trying to ignore someone

- He also plays music for the hotel to dance too, finding that he and Angel enjoyed the same music (bc of the similar time period)

- Husk once got alastor drunk enough to dance with Charlie and taught her how to Charleston dance

- Nifty is like everyone's child. You cannot mess with her

- Nifty will bring bugs to the person she likes most that day (usually alastor)

- Vaggie has threatened angel's life on many occasions

- Those two argue constantly (it's friendly tho)

- Charlie spends a lot of her time breaking up little spats in the hotel

- Charlie has nightmares about the time she saw alastors true demon form

- It made her feel super bad for him too, and she's offered to cut the stitches on his mouth but he refuses

- Lucifer is trying to be a better dad

- It's hard but he is actively trying

- He likes to hand out rubber ducks he's made/painted when people are upset

- Angel has a lot of them, bc he frequently seems to catch Lucifer when he's returning from work

- Lucifer is autistic for sure

- And his ducks are his special interest

- Lowkey he's also smitten by fat nuggets when he meets him

- So much so that when angel is at work lucifer happily offers to feed and look after the lil guy

- Fat nuggets once ate off of alastors plate, and that's the only time it ever happened bc by fucking god did alastor go crazy

- He didn't hurt fat nuggets tho it's okay, he wanted to but angel was like ILL DIE AGAIN BITCH TRY ME MOTHERFUCKER and pulled out some guns

- Angel gives Alastor the tea of what's going down with the Vee's when he gets it

- Mainly bc he hates the Vee's as much as Alastor and also bc Alastor asked him too and he's kinda scared of him

- And also bc it's fucking easy bc Val is a dumb bitch who doesn't know how to be subtle if he tried, Vox thinks so little of Angel that he thinks Angel would be too focused on the sex and Velvette doesn't care much for Angel either

- That's not to say that the Vee's haven't tried to get Angel to be their spy on the inside too, it's just Angel is like nothing to report also I gotta work sorry and just lies to them

- A wannabe patron once was rude to Charlie and lucifer decked them

- Everyone was amazed he had it in him to do it like that bc damn mans was pissed

- Let's just say nobody is rude to Charlie anymore just in case

- Also Charlie is also fucking terrifying when she wants/needs to be

- Someone called Angel a whore and tried to touch him and she went off

- Lucifer had to hold her back

- Fuck with her friends and she will kill you 😊

- Charlie cries at everything (good or bad)

- Vaggie is a real trooper putting up with it

- Angel was like "would you be like that with me if I cried all the time?" To husk, and husk with no hesitation said "fuck no"

- Husk treats Angel like a princess in the streets but a slut in the sheets

- They've deffo fucked behind the bar

- Charlie and Rosie keep in touch

- They have tea parties with Alastor

- Val is scared of Niffty bc she's unpredictable and bc he's not over what happened in the club

[fangirlingpuggle]

Bleach fic prompt/AU (though mostly Aishin) where after his plans started but before the turn the pendulum arc Aizen knows there will decades before his plans can go further so as he can't do anything and everything is already set in motion in the background he creates an illusionary personality to take control so he doesn't have to go through the motions and a total innocent version will just make his alibi's easier and no one will suspect him once he takes back over.

So for decades there's an Aizen who is actually good and gets along with people having friends and not just on surface level and caring for people, and he is of course head of heels for Shinji (No megalomania or layers upon layers of denial). Shinji is of course so very confused and very deep in denial that he is also smitten because he knows Aizen is evil and panning something and a liar and he doesn't know what he's planning and why he's acting odd, but he can't trust him. He keep s reminding himself of this constantly (it doesn't always work)

And everything is going fine until the original personality under the 'illusion' starts to try and take control back except this good Aizen isn't just an illusion the complete hypnosis created a real personality a real person. He's not letting the other take back control, he's trying to fight back.

Except he's acting different now trying to fight a megalomaniac, evil mastermind personality trying to get control and Shinji can tell somethings up only he pushes aside his worry and goes into 'See still evil, he's planning something he's a liar he's lying about something, he's never been different'. This creates an opening for the original Aizen who can point out how Shinji has never seen either of them as different he still thinks he;s evil he doesn't see you he just sees me.

Original Aizen is able to take back over and... no one notices everyone see's there's something a bit off but he seems fine it's ok, and Shinji of course is convincing himself that he was right Aizen is liar whatever that was was a trick, even if a part of him doesn't believe it and knows somethings off.

Then 3 options

Angtsy option: Everything happens as canon and it's only years later when somehow through Urahara experiment bullshit they realize 2 different Aizen's... by the time they confront they're faced with realization when original Aizen took back over the new personality was destroyed.

Angst with happy ending option: When Aizen gets the hogyoku, it realizes oh two people in here finds the remnants of the other personality that's been locked away by Aizen and is like 'hey what do you want?'. Cue other version splitting from Aizen with own body in middle of fight and everyone is confused. Then the angst that no one realized he was different or saw the change and all the mistrust. Also in denial pinning Shinji. (More angst potential if the other Aizen had been aware the entire time seeing everything but unable to take nay control)

More funny version: When Aizen is tuning them in Vizards he decides to reveal about what happened cue Shinji crisis but also 'Oh thank the soul king i'm not in love with this evil son of a bitch ok I can stop repressing feelings' and then after they escape the plan is 'kick evil Aizen's ass get our friend back'. When they show up to the battle Shinji has flowers, chocolates and a card saying 'Sorry I didn't realize your evil other self took back over' with chappy on it. (He also has a ring because he's been pining for years, the others tried to take it off hi because fucking hell man let the man have a day... and probably a therapy session or two first)

Sorry if this is dumb I am so very tired.

[just-a-random-dead-thing]

~Lost and found~ (Larissa Weems x student!reader)

The reader is 19 in this fic!!! The show makes it clear they have students well above the age of consent.

Sorry for the longer than expected wait! Mocks are a bitch and a half! The reader is a snarky little shit in this chapter btw- The chapters will be getting slightly longer as I get more comfortable with the story but please let me know if you would prefer shorter chapters.

Chapter 1, Chapter 2 (1.2k words)

Thank you for all your kind words about the last chapter <3 I hope you continue to enjoy my shitty angst!!!

Lastly thank you once again to @thefangedman for the editing to make the story make any semblance of sense. You should check out their Tiffany Valentine fic! It's amazing!!!

Static takes over my senses. I slowly come round from my near death experience at the hands of my own Headmistress - ‘my duty is to protect all the students within these walls’ my ass. The glaring lights start to bother my shut eyes, begging me to open them and rejoin the living world. I'll give it 5 more minutes. I haven't had a nap like this in years.

Just as I'm getting comfortable, I hear the tapping of heels on a wooden floor, pacing back and forth. From what I can piece together, Weems accidentally impeded my ability to breathe; I passed out and she has dragged me to her office because she's too embarrassed to tell the nursing staff what happened. Hmm... I should have some fun with her. Fake amnesia seems like it'll do the trick. I mentally smirk, thinking over the horrified reaction I'll get to see on her face.

I flutter open my eyes to play into the act of just having awoken. I stare at the ceiling, hearing her rush towards me. "Mx/Mr/Miss L/N, how are you feeling? It appears you... umm, passed out in the corridor."

I turn to face her, sitting up on the leather sofa I'm lying on. I rub my forehead, slightly obscuring my eye as a confused expression crosses my features.

"...I'm sorry but who is Mx/Mr/Miss L/N, and who are you?" Her face, like I thought, is priceless - she even backs away slightly.

Her voice quivers as she talks, an unfamiliar tone in the usually confident woman.

"S-shit...no no no. This can't be happening, I d-didn't. God, what am I going to do-" with this, she grips my face in her hand, the other removing my own from my forehead, grasping it gently as our eyes meeting in perfect alignment. The only difference is her eyes are glazed over with tears that will fall any second, "I am so sorry, Y/N..."

God, this was meant to be fun, but it's just depressing.

I swear, she has an ability to suck all the joy out of anything I do. I roll my eyes at her, but in reality a small part of me feels regret. Regret over my actions, regret over leaving her in this state, but alas, I repress this thought and lean into the anger. I rip my hand out of hers and shove her away from me.

"You're so annoying! I can't even prank you after you nearly murder me without you sucking the joy out of it. Also- thanks for being too scared to take me to see the nursing staff, or even an actual fucking doctor incase God forbid you got into trouble. I could have gotten actual brain damage-"

I am interrupted mid-rant when she embraces me, her face buried in my neck, now fully sobbing. Fuck. Why do I always have to be such a blunt asshole? I need Noah to translate my words into nice ‘feeling protecting’ ones, he's good at all the dumb emotional stuff. Normally I am at least okay at faking, and I can get by, but everything just feels so foggy. No matter how hard I try, I can't concentrate on finding the right words.

I feel awkward as her hot tears sear into my skin like a mark of shame. I bring my hand to her head, undoing her usual pristine hairstyle. I run my hand over her scalp and the nape of her neck, gently scratching her skin. She calms down slowly, relaxing more into me more. My hand slows with her tears, until both cease and we remain there, unmoving for what feels like eternity. Neither one of us knows how to proceed, not wanting to ruin our brief moment of peace and unspoken understanding of what the other needs.

It has to end eventually however, and I am the one to do so, saying words I never thought I'd utter to this woman in my life. Before I can gather what to say three simple words cross my mind, "...I am sorry."

No. I will never apologise to this woman.

Instead I simply remove all venom from my being. I render myself completely vulnerable to her, a spider without its fangs, completely defenceless. "I don't think before I speak. As you know I'm not exactly great at the whole communication thing. So understand, I did not mean to hurt you. I just struggle when taking others emotions into account and instead I chose to be selfish by lashing out at you, it was immature of me."

The air felt thick as I tried to regain my lost stoicism. I feel shame and pity for both of us. I pry her away from my body as I stand, desperately needing to leave, but my legs buckle beneath my weight as everything goes blurry - fuck. I must have hit my head harder than I thought.

Before my body can meet the welcoming ground, I am snatched by a set of strong arms. She turns me to face her once more, before gently setting me on the settee. She turns away from me walking towards her desk as she speaks, her voice still not quite back to it's typical happy/mildly aggressive cadence.

"I had the nurses come to see you here, because I know you don't like the nursing wing of the academy. They said you'd have a mild concussion from hitting your head, and told me to observe you, which is why I didn't put you in your dorm. I know you think of me as being too proud to admit when I am wrong, but I want you to know I will never put my pride before the health of you, or anyone else in this academy."

God, what is wrong with Weems, I think I broke her. She's being too emotional - in the sad way, normally she's just angry. I swear, she speaks exclusively in passive aggressive niceness. I lift my head to properly meet her eyes.

She has taken her seat pride of place behind her desk, having almost the same power behind it as when a queen takes her throne. I begin to verbalise my thoughts.

"Are you on your period? Or are you too old for that... when does menopause start? Oh wait, could it be perimenopause? Oh god, are you pregnant? Can you still even get pregnant?" I become horrified as the last thought even crossed my mind, that poor child.

I notice Weem's equally horrified expression contorting her features, "Mx/Mr/Miss L/N just how old do you think I am exactly? I also don't appreciate the invasive line of questioning, but for your information, no, I am not pregnant."

I shutter slightly feeling her peircing gaze wait for me to answer her. "I want to say, 54...?" Oh God, she looks like she's about to slap me. "54! I beg your pardon, Mx/Mr/Miss L/N, I am 44, and I do not appreciate you aging me a decade! I should give you an extra detention for this alone."

I look at her, wondering if she has been seriously affected by my words, merely her vanity showing as per usual, or if this is her failed attempt trying to be more humorous while scolding me. I run my hand through my hair and let it fall over my eyes.

"I don't give a shit how old you are! You still cried like a baby either way, get over yourself, you're not 2. So what? You nearly murdered someone, we've all been there. You aren't special, so don't expect sympathy from me!"

Weems stands once and strides towards me. I am not interested in her lectures about manners and etiquette, so I leave quickly through the nearest set of doors and out into the corridor, taking a sharp right into the closest room to me.

Grabbing the chair beside me, I barricade the door, allowing myself to slide down it and contemplate all that's happened thus far, while also figuring out an excuse. I look around the room, only now realising I've locked myself within Weems' bedroom.

"Shit."

================tags================

@the-bagel24, @suckerforcate

[theonetruesonofgod]

RE8 Lords Blunt Rotation

Nobody asked for this but I want nothing more in life than to write it. The basic, obvious, plot, the lords, Ethan, Miranda, and Chris are passing a joint around and having a dumbass conversation. It's probably going to be kind of corny and dumb but that's because I'm stupid. * are used to describe the situation in between dialogues. Naturally, the Duke is their dealer.

Heisenberg: Fuck 12!

Miranda: Fuck you too *fumbling* you little... fuck

Miranda: *Kicks Moreau in the back, knocking him over, while giggling* Heisenberg did it... *coughs* like the meanie he is... punk-ass bitch.

Heisenberg: *Wheezes violently*

Moreau: *Rolling back and forth on the floor trying and failing to get up* That's not very nice of you, Karl.

Chris: *thinking, starts laughing, speaks in a dazed voice* "I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow this down, hee, heeh, heh, heh... with 40mm shells from a hydro-polymer tank."

Alcina: *Alci is also wine-drunk currently* I'll tell you all a secret. *desperately tries to keep the hat from falling off* I don't even like impressionism! It just fits my style!

*A random villager walks into the church. Heisenberg uses his metal powers to kill him, stabbing him with a bunch of metal scraps.*

Alcina: *Alcina looks over to the corpse* Kaaaaarl! There's a dead human in our house!

Heisenberg: Hey how did that get there?

Alcina: You killed him Karl! You didn't even ask me to help! *pouts*

Heisenberg: I did not kill him, that is, that is my least favorite thing to do.

Alcina: Kaaaaaarl! *Due to her height she falls over next to Moreau and desperately tries to move away from him*

*Donna is desperately trying to keep the weed away from Angie. Chris looks at them repeatedly blinking trying to convince himself he's not imagining this.*

Ethan: *Looks over and moves towards Heisenberg* You're lookin', real pretty... big burly metal man. *giggles*

Heisenberg: *His hat falls off* Ethan, you hot little twink... heh, heh, Ethan, do ya... do ya wanna make out with me? Hee, hee, hee

Ethan: *Leans in, Ethan and Karl begin passionately and lovingly making out, Karl begins steering Ethan toward the closet*

Miranda: Eeeeeh *Begins dancing the waltz alone while trying to sing "Dancing Queen" her voice cracking and her forgetting words and verses, as she dances she also begins stumbling repeatedly.*

Moreau: *Finally standing, he walks toward Miranda hoping to join her in whatever she's doing, he reaches her, reaching for her hands*

Miranda: *Kicks Moreau in whatever left of his nuts, Moreau sputters and moans on the ground*

Ethan/Karl: *A noise emanates from the closet, thumping and Ethan's loud moaning. Karl and Ethan's repressed attraction to each other has finally broken free and they're happily fucking in the other room. Chris desperately tries to hide his massive erection in the corner.*

Miranda: *Repeatedly kicking Moreau and giggling, Moreau doesn't even notice by now*

Donna: *Restraining Angie as she tries to jump at a now snoring Alcina with a knife*

[stu-machers-ghost]

why copycat two highschool loser ass dickheads?? Stu was a pussy ass wet rat-- and billy loomis. BILLY LOOMIS?? WHAT THE FUCK!! JESUS WHAT A RAT-LOOKING HOMO-REPRESSED MAMAS BOY!! WHY NOT SET YOUR GOALS HIGHER, HUH??

@billy-ghost come look at this bitch and his dumb made-up insults haha ROFL

[fluffypotatey]

Say what you will about Arthur and his utter lack of game, but always appreciate the fact this man looked at Morgana, duchess of drip, and decided a dagger would be the best gift for her.

And when it was pointed out that it might not be her style, he went "ah shit you right" and just had the fucking thing tricked out. That was his solution. That was his thought process. Not that a knife was inappropriate, but that it needed to be a custom piece. No basic bitches in this household.

Mans said "what shall I get my significant annoyance this year?", shook his braincell like a Magic 8 Ball, and came up with "knife."

We stan one princely himbo.

ngl i like to use this as proof for Arthur and Morgana being so close and knowing each other so well because i have such a soft spot for my pendragon siblings 🤧

(thoughts under the cut bc….*coughs* i suffer from pendragon sibs brainrot)

listen, listen to me: these guys really did only have each other when they were younger and surrounded by nobody but stuffy nobles and an emotionally repressed/abusive father. Arthur lost his mother king before he got to know her, and Morgana lost a father whom she knew and loved so dearly. they were children who never really got to grieve what was lost from them (although, in some way, Morgana was given some time to grieve and mourn but never for too long).

Arthur has known Morgana for her spunk and rebellious nature against the status quo King Uther enforces since they were children. She was always trying to learn to fight (see her bragging about beating Arthur when they were younger in 1x10) and probably taught herself secretly how to use a sword (or had some help as well 👀 but that’s just a headcanon). She was always at odds with Uther about magic (while Arthur would receive severe punishment for disagreeing with his father, Morgana’s anguish was treated like the flights of a lady’s emotions).

It would be offensive (towards Morgana) if Arthur were to ever gift her something so stereotypical and stuffy on her birthday. He most likely knew that she would have wanted something to use to protect herself: ergo, dagger.

Fuckinnnnnnng, read what Arthur says about his gift omfg 🫠

ARTHUR Beautiful, isn't it? Feel the balance, feel the sharpness of the blade.

I AM PUNCHING THE WALLS 🫠🫠🫠🫠

This man put so much thought and care into this gift for her. Listen, she was his first friend, the first person to not treat him like he was fragile or the fault of his mother’s demise. She was Arthur’s sister before he even knew that’s how he saw her and their relationship. Morgana meant so much to him, your honor, I fucking can’t. They loved each other so much despite the gradual rift that he gained when we first meet them in s1, your honOR—

But then you have Merlin’s comment:

MERLIN Well, I'm no expert, but don't women normally go for pretty things? Like, maybe, jewellery?

(yes he said this as a way to deter Arthur from sticking with a dagger bc of the vision he saw but still)

And so Arthur Dumb-of-ass & bi-of-sexual Pendragon takes Merlin’s advice, realizes that yeah, Morgana still likes feminine things like dressed and jewelry and pretty shit. LET ME BEDAZZLE THIS DAGGER JUST FOR HER

LOOK AT IT

THE FUCKING PENDRAGON COLORS YIU CHEEKY FUCK ARTHUR 🤧 AND LOOK AT HER REACTION TO IT

SHE LOOKS ENTRANCED BY IT???? MAYBE TOUCHED (<- fluffy is reaching, she has gone insane) MAYBE EVEN CONSIDERING THAT ARTHUR DOES CARE AND MAYBE SHE COUOD TURN HIM AGAINST UTHER TO JOIN HER???? (<- fluffy.exe is suffering malfunctions. delusion file has been corrupted)

Literally every other noble gifted her a fancy hairbrush (those fucking posers) and you would think! With how much this show presents Arthur as emotionally repressed and very obtuse when it comes to women, you would think they would regress his character (again) to make a joke out of him (again) not knowing what to give Morgana for her birthday

BUT THEY DONT!!!!

NO! THEY SHOW HIM BEING CONFIDENT IN HIS DECISION FOR IT TO BE A DAGGER THEN NERVOUS ABOUT HIS CHOICE BC MAYBE IT’S NOT A GOOD DAGGER THEN PROUD BECAUSE NOW IT IS A BEDAZZLED DAGGER

WHAT THE FU—

Not only that, BUT SHE TAKES THE DAGGER WITH HER WHEN MEETING MORGAUSE (s3’s big bad villain who is the new up-and-coming High Priestess after Nimueh, whom Merlin smited (smote? smitten?) and does not give any fucks about Uther or Arthur. Both could just die for all she cares.)

I would never lie to you. Transcript speaks the truth. Also, what other dagger would they speak about??? It’s Arthur’s gift and she was so touched by it that she decided to use it for her nefarious schemes of regicide!

OH YEAH AND AFTER THIS WHEN SHE’S IN A COMA YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT ARTHUR SAID

ARTHUR To lose her now, like this...I've grown up with her, she's like a sister to me. I'd sacrifice my place on the throne for her to see another sunrise.

*deep breath*

So much shit could have been avoided if these dumbass Pendragons just talked to each other T^T Jfc, Arthur loves those close to him so deeply. He is so loyal to them that it blinds him, that he would willingly give up anything just to keep them alive and happy.

ough, yeah I’m okay (<- liar)

[just-walk-around]

I don't read or watch the twilight saga, I only have seen some parts. But I love fanfics, I twilight fanfics are part of all the group of shows that I like. But my queer ass prefer a platonic relationship than romantic between Bella and Edward. WLW and MLM is the best friendship ever.

Edward (sad, dramatic, repressed hundred years old but still mentally teenager gay): I'M A MONSTER, AN ABOMINATION THE WORST, GOD WILL NEVER OPEN THE DOORS TO HEAVEN FOR ME.

Bella (kinda depressed, sarcastic, weird, grow up to fast, absolute disaster lesbian): DUDE, IS JUST A FUCKING SPIDER!

Bella x all female vampire (except esme that woman is her mother figure you can't change my mind) is delicious.

Alice? Friends to lovers, calm gf and too much energy gf, "sweast and t shirt is enough" "as your future wife I have full right to change your clothes" "my Future Fucking what?!" "opps spoilers" , oh you are weird I weird too! Besties!

Rosalie? Rival to lovers, tsundere gf and oblivious gf, "I fucking hate you" "oh, then what you buy me a new car?" "BECAUSE THAT SHITTY TRUCK HURT MY EYES", family intervention because they Will never get together otherwise "I'm not jealous!"You just make a boy cry because he told her how nice her hair looked!" "wow your sister is beautiful but she is a bitch, just because she is hot and smart and have a pretty smile and..." "Bells just ask her out this is painful to watch" "I don't love her!" "Bella take a moment to think about everything that happened between you two, EVERYTHING and tell me again that you don't love her" "I.. *processing information" "HOLY FUCK I'M IN LOVE WITH YOUR SISTER""Congratulations you are THE LAST TO KNOW IT! "

Any of the Denali trio ? Teacher x student, "I have met this human for one second now I love her I will provide everything for her I will make her happy Fucked up!Edward stay away", patient gf with hurt gf.

Victoria or any volturi girl? Enemy to friends to lovers, reluctant gf and resigned gf, denial, denial and more denial, the bad guys are actually doing good things, "I will never fall in love with you" "I have all the time of the world darling". Unhealthy relationship going to healthy relationship.

The other vampire clans? The possibilities are endless!.

PLUS PAPA BEAR CHARLIE JUS GOING FULL SUPPORTIVE,HE COULD EITHER BE PUTTING RAINBOWS STICKERS IN HIS CLOTHES, "YES SIR I LOVE NY GAY DAUGHTER DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT" OR HAVING NO IDEA HOW TO GO ABOUT IT, "So you like tits? I like tits too! I mean, uh" "did you need um you know advice? About you know?" "dad please you are killing me" the best Is that he wouldn't care if his daughter is dating a vampire BUT THEY ARE SO OLD, HE WOULD BE LOOKING THINKING IS THIS PREDATORY BEHAVIOR? AND BELLA BEING LIKE DAD WE JUST ARE HOLDING HANDS There will not be a shotgun he will buy a freaking flamethrower he will spend all his money for a fishing boat to buy it. Because God dammit he is a dad trying his best!.

Edward x Jacob? Enemy to friends to lovers, cross lovers, cat bf x dog bf, homophobic Edward, denial denial and more denial, supportive cullens or slightly homophobic because of their differents ages trying their best to overcome their views for their son/brother, VS the pack "my imprint is a boy" "That's okay we love you and support you anyway"" he is a vampire""WHAT THE FUCK YOU SAY?! EXILE FOR JACOB, EXILED FOR HUNDRED OF YEARS"

Edward x Emmett? I get us in trouble bf and I get us out of trouble bf, calm bf and too much energy bf, grumpy cat bf and dumb bear bf, "babe what animal is the pink panther?" "dear, is in the name" "I think is a lion" "love of my life is a panther" "I Google it panther aren't pink" "AND FUCKING LIONS ARE?" "You do something stupid again don't you" "no, I just think he will like some roses for his room and a new piano" "sure"

Edward x jasper? Learning together to live with overwhelming powers and the guilt of our decisions and mistakes.

And just for the shit of it, Edward x Aro, Carlisle going FULL PAPA BEAR ON IT.

Like it could go the hurt/comfort route or the comedic route and it will be amazing.

[horseshoemybeloved]

wait i am really intrigued with your versions of the suitehearts i love the designs and seeing your take on them so please infodump about them to me about this obscure fob au that i’ve been insane about for years

It is now time for my long ass ( my version of the ) suitehearts masterpost * wiggles fingers *

Keep in mind!!!

So basically first things first, my versions of ‘em are Completely different characters. Some draw/view the suitehearts as fob in silly costumes ( which is super chill ) but my versions are very different. So when I say “ Benzedrine is a repressed gay wizard obsessed with abba“ I am in no ways implying that Patrick is a repressed gay wizard obsessed with abba. There are some similarities between people but it is never intentional. ( also I’m constantly changing stuff nothings set in stone lol )

Da world!

The world is kinda like a purgatory, everyone there has died but could move to another plane. Thusly there are people from all different decades. Magic is very common here, a lot of people can do small basic spells. But it takes years of practice to become a wizard, and decades to become a good one. There are 5 main,,, species? Races? I’m not quite sure how to label em. But we have:

your average human, nothing really of note here

elemental benders ( they are born with a cavity in their chest relating to what “ element “ they control. Some control water some Disco music! )

Pixies/sprites, they usually have abnormal colored skin, pointy ears, and the ability to float around. They naturally have good connection with spirits and can summon them when needed ( if they’re good at it )

Angels, they’re naturally fun colors, have magical hair, and vaguely cow like ears?. Angles can use their magic to make themselves look like normal humans tho. They usually live together and provide comfort for people. But there has been a rebellion happening and now a lot of angels try and live life not for the sole service of others but now for themselves ( is allegory 4 womanhood moment )

And then of course furries xoxo

Now the reason you even started reading this, info about the suitehearts!

Dr. benzedrine is vaguely narcissistic and full of himself, but in an oddly charming way. Personality wise hes a mixture of howl ( hmc ) without Any of the swauve, mostly just the dramatics, and aziraphale ( good omens ). Hes a middle aged man who Will Not admit hes gay, he is Incredibly repressed. He was apart of the huge royal academy of wizards, best one they’d ever had. But had a falling out with the leader in charge and now just has his own little wizard store. He befriended Donnie at a little diner because he made a reference to a Kate bush or Fiona apple song, or something or other. Him and sandman do Not get along, sandman often visits the store just to annoy him. But they have more similarities than they know, they just need to stop bitching at eachother!

( also he was born like 5’ something but the spirits in charge of transferring people to this plane were like “ I’d be mad funny if we made him really short he’d be so mad “ )

He is my autistic little meow meow 😔🙏

Horseshoe has a regal flowyness to him, semi-oblivious to his own charm, and loves to dance the night away. When everyone around him is disheveled and falling apart, he still manages to look fantastic. He appears to be the dumb blonde of the group, which he definitely doesn't mind and loves to indulged in the trope. ( he may not know where or even what Sweden is but at least hes pretty ) But he is a deeply creative person, and that in its own special way shows an intelligence. He works at a small local craft store ( bcus then he gets first dibs on all the cool new art supplies :D ) he is an angel, but chooses to focus his little magical power on constantly disguising himself cus he doesn’t wanna be bothered lol.

Donnie is very nurturing and kind, yet extremely energetic and bubbly, think kinda like,,, super sweet valleygirl. He’s slightly based off YouTuber Garret watts. He is very big solid guy. He has a bit of a problem with feeling like he Needs to take care of everyone, like it’s job ( he’s workin through it in therapy ) Like I mentioned there are people who are like elemental benders, Donnie is one of them. He has a little terrarium with either a mushroom or a daisy, and can make vines grow from his hands and legs. Donnie is also autistic ( heavily based on my experiences with it, he’s also just kinda heavily based off of me ) He's from da 60s, during the whole hippy thing.

Sandman is your typical bitchy mallgoth, who goes around calling everyone a " poser" and everything " poser shit " they put up a bitchy angry front but deep down theyre an insecure sensitive little guy. Sandman is a Pixie so that means they can summon these ( usless ) spirit guys ( they’re not very good at it ) shes also kinda Super into typical """ cringey """ stuff from 2015 ( ie undertale, fnaf, the lving tombstone, mlp ) Sandman is semi kinda not really it’s complicated openly non-binary, but still seems to repress quite a bit and just push away all deeper feelings. I thought it would be interesting to experiment with a character who is a trans femme gay guy, kinda like a reverse trans masc lesbian I guess. Idk lol don’t get mad at me

Anything else kiddo?

The format id choose to express this story would def be a movie. Uhhh… I can’t really think of much else right now, but feel free to ask questions I luv talking about em :3

[helly-watermelonsmellinfellon]

I am full of barely repressed rage.

Guess where these are from?!

New chick Dave's cheating with... is blackmailing him. His dumb ass turned to a stranger he met on Facebook and began telling her all about his personal life. He told her about Bethy(his 16 y/o daughter), D(his son), B(Dustin's wife), and O and E(D's babies). She knows so much about his personal shit, she can actually blackmail him with threats of sending all this info to unsavory sources, and he's been sending her these gift cards for weeks. There are over a dozen more, and over $1,000 he's sent in just a couple months.

He decided to bring his concerns to Bethy cuz this bitch is demanding more and more money in the form of these gift cards. Bethy told him he's being blackmailed and need to tell the police, and while he was a bit distracted, she scrolled a bit higher in his texts to see what's going on. Today, she came to mom because she's finally sick of being the one Dave dumps all his shit onto. She had a thick ass stack of these gift cards and receipts from Walgreens and revealed what she'd read in his texts.

Dave's scared of going to jail because he told some stranger about all his poor decision making and she's telling him she'll go to the cops with a whole list of things to explain why he's a bad parent and why his daughter should be taken away from him. That she'll expose his grandchildren to bad people(like this is morally righteous behavior?) So, he's taking money he gets from his boss and paying this chick off.

AND HE'S DONE THIS BEFORE! IT ISN'T NEW!

If anyone recalls 2022. Dave did not work a day in 2022. In August of 2021 he sustained a terrible knee injury at work and instead of taking the blame, they fired him. Only to find out they let him go without officially firing him for months and tried to collect taxes from him up until December of 2021. He had to dispute that shit with proof and was finally officially fired sometime in January of 2022.

He did not work because his knee was just so bad, for the entirety of 2022. My Ko-Fi and the GFM kept us going between motels the entire time if we weren't in the van. In February of 2023, a friend of his called him to ask where he was. "Hey, man, [so-so] is looking for you. He needs help in his shop, and he thought of you first."

And so Dave went back to work finally, after claiming for 16 months that he couldn't because of his knee. In all of 2022, Dave was cheating with 2 different women, and a potential third. 1 at the Salvation Army he claimed he was working at(he wasn't btw, she was just giving him money cuz she felt bad for him) and the other was some chick on Facebook. He was doing shit in front of Bethy and she narked on him because he was getting money from one chick and then giving it to the other. And he was forcing Bethy to help him get money orders and shit at Walmart with said money cuz his ass is so useless he can't fucking read.

So, we've had to deal with this before, WHILE HOMELESS. And he's doing it again. Except this time, it's worse!

Here we are, struggling to get by, dealing with the fact that we have 14 days left in this house and no guarantee of necessary internet or heat in the dilapidate place he's supposedly gotten us now. And here Dave is telling other people's personal business to some chick he's cheating with. Endangering his kids and grandkids. While also treating Bethy terribly because she needs him to be a parent and take her to school and to the doctor and to other shit.

Mom had to call his son and warn him ahead of time in case something happens. Bethy locked herself in her room because she didn't want him to take his anger out on her when the ball drops.

And the moment mom even mentioned how she had no money for the rest of the bills, nor the money to switch everything over to a new place, and he complained about how HE doesn't have money for anything either, she pulled the, 'oh really? we need to talk about that' on him and he backed out of the room instantly, using the fact that she's disabled and can't pursue to get out of the conversation.

Also, his son called mom back and revealed that Dave's been begging him for money for days! He wanted $300 last night. So, he's gonna probably call again and give Dave an earful.

[biaoba]

also, why everyone vilifying the youth for hating sex conveniently forgets to acknowledge that a big part of it is the resurging gender war and the fact that the girlies simply do not want to be having sex with these awful ass men?! oh noo, the new generation hates the idea of fucking strangers when day in and day out theyre on they phone being bombarded with tales of sexual violence even years into marriage. like its kinda not my problem and i kinda dgaf that you hag bitches were too sexually repressed and horny to consider not fucking everyone you could and chaining yourselves down because you were too dumb to resist the peer pressure of the nuclear family. shrug emoji stay pressed that the youngsters have standards. yall have no idea how sex negative i can truly be. also sljskfj this just reminded me of that big twitter discourse last year about prep and how its the gays god given right to not use condoms if they dont want to!!! trust me bro its way more convenient if we are all just heavily medicated!!! if pregnancy is not a risk why even use protection!! wait what do you mean there is more than one sexually transmitted infection out there 😨 oh well i will continue protecting myself from only the worst one and if you want me to use condoms ure literally a homophobic bigot reeee!!!

[ultramaga]

She was very popular with early cosplayers. Women like being sexy. Feminists hate seeing women who look better than they do.

The irony is, I am pretty sure Wendy Pini considers herself a feminist. She just wasn't an envious little bitch of one.

Also, I am somewhat certain she is bisexual (stories vary), and she certainly loves hot women in her art.

I think a Red Sonja movie could be a hit, but not if made by Hollywood. You need a studio that understands tits and ass sell tickets, but great stories make people watch over and over.

Conan was pretty trashy in a lot of ways, and not terribly faithful to the source, but man was it entertaining. It had hot women, manly men, action and humour - not to mention interesting cinematography.

I saw it with a hardcore fan who was annoyed at how dumbed down they made him. I think he spoke something like seven languages. Being a barbarian didn't make him stupid.

It's funny that you can make a male character the butt of jokes but not a female, not in Hollywood. Instead, you end up with Ghostbusters 2016, where the men are too dumb to breathe.

I miss the days when women were allowed to be sexy. It's ironical that the feminist movement started with sexual liberation and ended with repression and misery. And now it pushes to make every child sexless eunuchs.

I was there, in the 1970s, I marched and talked and knew many feminists. One I remember well.

She was a manhater but she loved being dominated by men, she was bisexual, and I don't know if she was the same to women, but she was perfectly open about what she wanted men to do to her.

If anything, she saw it as a part of her feminist beliefs that men should do such things, because that was her pleasure, and she hated the shaming she had heard from the church when she was growing up.

Wanting to have a man dominant doesn't make you weak. Wanting to be pretty and feminine doesn't make you oppressed. You can have female heroes that both sexes enjoy.

So why can't feminists acknowledge that, and let us have the movies we would actually pay to see?

Or if not, why don't movie makers bypass the Hollywood system? Can Japan or Korea make a hot female action hero?

Someone who likes to be spanked, who wants to marry her man, but who will lay seven shades of smack down on the bad guys?

Red Sonja by Joseph Michael Linsner.