#these could be better but i kinda gave up on them

[toomanystoriessolittletime]

Roadside

Summary: On your way back from a long weekend that you got to spent with Joel, his car breaks down. While you both waited for Tommy to get there to help, Joel has some ideas on how to spend the time waiting.

Pairing: Joel Miller x fem. reader

Wordcount: 792

Rating: T

Warnings: roadtrips, falling in love but slowly, car trouble, implied smut, kissing, flirting, feelings, teasing, kinda secret dating, fourteen year age gap

A/N: I'm missing references to three pics I think, but it doesn't get better than this lol (technically I am not here, because I am on a writing break) The moodboard screamed road trip to me, so this is what I did. This is for @iamasaddie 24 hour writing challenge and I hope it does not suck 🙃

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Full Masterlist // Joel Miller Masterlist

„What are you gonna tell him when he gets here?“ You hummed, looking up at Joel. He gave you a small smile before he stepped closer, his big, strong hands coming down to part your legs for him, stepping between them so he was towering over you, the sun slowly setting on the horizon.

You had almost made it home. 

After a long weekend of having Joel to yourself without the fear of running into someone you both knew (if you left your hotel room at all) that you had spend in a tiny town in close to Dallas, you were on your way back, just an hour out of Austin when his truck made a very sad noise until the engine went out and the car stopped on the side of the road. 

He had tried to get it to work before, with a long groan, he told you he had to call Tommy cause the something something needed a something so he could fix it. He had kept his eyes on you the whole times as he made the call, looking beyond sexy in the shirt you bought him, with his too long getting hair that you had spent all night running your fingers through as he made you cum over and over again until you both passed out. 

You had met Tommy before. You just hadn’t met him as Joel’s girlfriend.

Things between you and Joel had been… slow until they weren’t.

You’ve known each other for almost two years due to you working as an interior designer occasionally with his company. But it was six months ago that you had gotten closer as you worked on a very time consuming project where the client brought you both to the verge of insanity with how often they were changing the plans. 

He had finally asked you out one night and the rest as they say, was history. 

„Guess I’m finally gonna introduce my controversially young girlfriend to him,“ Joel smiled before he kissed you softly. You gasped in mock offence, before tilting your chin up to meet his lips with a smile, your hands running up his broad back until your fingers slipped into his hair on the back of his neck. 

„Not that controversial,“ you grinned and he chuckled before his lips kissed down your neck. 

„Fourteen years is a lot,“ he mumbled against your neck and you sighed, letting your head fall to the side to give him more access. One of his hands slowly drifted up your thighs, his fingers pushing the fabric of your skirt up. 

„Only if you care what other people think. Last time I checked, we’re both very consenting adults,“ you said and he playfully bit into your neck making your shriek. 

„How consenting are we talking about here exactly?“ He asked and you looked up at him as one of his hands slipped between your legs, his fingers brushing over your damp panties. 

You could feel your nipples harden against the fabric of the shirt you had put on this morning and Joel seemed to notice too, his other hand coming up to cup one of your tits, his thumb playing with your nipple.

Looking around you realised that you were pretty much in the middle of nowhere. You couldn’t even remember when you had seen a car drive by the last time. 

„Consenting enough to let you fuck me in the middle of nowhere until your brother gets here,“ you whispered against his ear and he groaned, letting his forehead fall against yours. 

„Atta girl,“ he grinned, before he kissed you again while his hands made quick work of your underwear. 

You could still feel him dripping out of you, your legs a little weak, when you jumped of the back of the truck, Joel taking your hand as the door of the car that had parked behind his opened and a man jumped out, looking between the two of you. 

The sun had set by now, the cold air making you shiver and Joel let go of your hand, to put an arm around your waist, pulling you closer against him, the warmth of his body helping instantly. 

„So this is how I get to find out the mysterious woman that makes my brother grin like a teenager with a crush when he looks at his phone is you?“ Tommy Miller approached with a wide grin. You could practically hear Joel roll his eyes and you smiled at his brother. 

„You got a crush on me, Miller?“ You teased and looked up at him. 

„Brat,“ he sighed, fighting a smile.

„You love it,“ you winked, feeling him pull you closer. 

„Yeah, I really do,“ he hummed before he kissed you softly. 

[morbethgames]

Love In Stasis - Chapter 3

( NOTE: THIS IS THE LAST CHAPTER THAT WILL BE PLANNED TO BE POSTED HERE ON TUMBLR! At least for now. If you'd like to continue reading, a chapter a week will be released on Patreon for the $5. I hope you enjoyed the first three chapters, and I hope you'll consider supporting me! Link to Patreon is here.)

Chapter 3

Madeline gave three solid knocks on the door of the third floor dorm room. She had taken Melody out shopping a couple of hours ago, and both of them got new outfits for their girls night out. But it wouldn’t do to have Mel fall asleep on the dance floor, so she let her best friend spend a few hours at her dorm room to get some shut eye in her room. 

Maddie knocked a couple more times on the door, and afterwards, heard Luz’s voice come through. “Yeah! Just a sec!” 

When the door finally opened, Luz was standing on the other side of it. “Hey, I-” Madeline began, but once Luz was in full view, she stopped. All the toned woman had on was a white tank top and a pair of women’s boxers. Maddie’s eyes wandered to Luz’s arm that was propped up against the wall, then back to her face, which she had just slicked her hair back from since it was soaked. 

“Sorry about the wait.” Luz said, “You caught me just as I was getting out of the shower.” She looked behind her, pointing her thumb over her shoulder, then looked back towards Madeline. “Mel isn’t here.”

Maddie took a second to come back to earth, then nodded, “Yeah, I know. I came here to talk to you.” 

Luz broke eye contact, releasing a large breath and stepping to the side while motioning with her arm for Madeline to come inside. “I’m assuming this is about last night?”

Madeline soon accepted the invitation, stepping in. “Yeah- Well, kinda.”

Luz furrowed her brow, confused, and let the door shut behind her friend. “Kinda?” Then leaned back against the wall. 

“Yeah, I wanted to talk to you about your guys’ living arrangements.” She crossed her arms and hardened her expression. Distracted only a bit by the steam just off in the far end of the hallway. She wasn’t kidding; she did just get out of the shower. “You guys can’t live together anymore.” 

Upon hearing what this was really about, Luz bowed her head and put her hands behind her back. “It’s eating her up inside.” Maddie continued, “and even if you wait until she’s out to invite your hookups over, it doesn’t stop it from keeping some wounds open.”

“I know.” Luz replied with an even tone. 

Madeline looked genuinely surprised at first, uncrossing her arms. “You-” She waited for a beat, the small sense of shock making her interrupt herself. “You know?” Then, that surprise turned into irritation. “Then why haven’t you done anything about it?”

“I have.” 

Maddie stared perturbedly, waiting for the taller woman to clarify her statement. Luz looked back up at her and shrugged in preparation of saying something extremely difficult. Something she didn’t really want to happen, but was going to anyway. “I’m gonna be crashing with Darrel for a couple months, or until Mel is,” She pondered how to put it, “better, I guess? I dunno.” 

Luz brought her hand up, rubbing the top of her head. 

Maddie’s eyes, for a split second, blinked towards the Hispanic woman’s adonis muscles that were partially revealed in the process, then refocused to her face again. “I wouldn’t know how to explain it. But I guess it’s just until she can get over me. She smiled sheepishly and let out a single, guilty chuckle. “I know I don’t exactly make that easy.” 

Madeline could tell, as well. She could tell that Luz was genuinely trying to do the right thing, and that maybe she was usually trying to do the right thing and it just fell flat sometimes. Maybe Melody was right. Perhaps she didn’t always give the woman a fair shake. 

“Oh, well,” Maddie began, not really knowing how to completely clear the air through the pent up awkwardness that had built over the last year from her and her best friend’s breakup. “Thanks, Luz. Really.” Maddie said, not really knowing how to completely clear the air through the pent up awkwardness that had built over the last year from her and her best friend’s breakup. 

Luz nodded subtly. “Yeah, no problem.” Then she looked down again. Silent. As if waiting for Madeline to begin making her exit already. 

Which the animal science major did. She began heading for the door, but in the process, had to actually walk past the half-naked woman to do so. When she did, she stopped and faced her. “Hey Luz.” She paused for a second, “You’re, um,” It felt strange being so real with the flirtatious woman. “You’re a good person.”

Luz lifted her head, her lips barely parted and her eyes looking as if they were searching for meaning, focusing on Madeline’s lips as Maddie continued to speak. “And I know I haven’t been as good of a friend as I could’ve been through yours and Mel’s breakup.” Luz’s eyes moved up to Maddie’s. “And I’m sorry about that.”

There was a beat that went by, and then a genuine, appreciative smile appeared on Luz’s lips. “I get it.” She sighed, stood up straight, then shrugged again. “You went up to bat for your best friend. I respect that, Mads.” Her eyes darted down, then up again. “It’s one of the things I like about you. But I, uh, appreciate it.” She spoke softly, “I do.” 

For a moment, Luz had to look away. She wasn’t all too good with showing real, honest emotions. Not with Madeline, at least. And so, because of that, a more flirtatious demeanor took hold. As a sort of wall she could put up to hide herself. “But y’know, I’m no saint in all this either. So if you ever need me to say sorry, I’ve heard I’m very good with my mouth.”

Madeline scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Yeah, thanks, but no thanks.” She thought for a moment, then leaned in a bit. “But if you really wanna say sorry, you can slip me Darrel’s number. Mel and I are going out tonight and he seems like he’d be more my speed, if you know what I mean.”

Luz’s eyes faltered, for only a split second. For a single moment while she huffed out a breath. But it was just not-so-subtle enough to be noticeable. “Yeah, not gonna happen.”

Maddie smiled, leaning forward a little more to look up at Luz. “What was that?”

Luz released a tense snicker, “What was what?”

“That.” Madeline said again, leaning in a bit closer. “Oh my god. Luz Marcellus, are you-” she let out an amused exhale, “Are you jealous?” Her poking and prodding was, of course, meant in a playful manner. 

The toned woman raised her eyebrows. “Me? Jealous?” She scoffed. “No.”

“I think you are.”

“Mads, watch yourself.” Luz playfully warned, taking a step closer. 

“Luz, I’ve never seen that look on you before.” Maddie took a single step back, still smirking. “Oh, don’t worry though, I won’t be part of whatever body count contest you guys are having. I’ll make it abundantly clear to him going into it that things are to stay between the-”

Before Madeline knew what was happening, she was between Luz and the wall, with the butch woman’s forearm placed above her head. The wet strands of hair hung down in front of her face, barely letting her brown eyes show through and burrow their way into Maddie’s own. The shorter woman’s gaze went wide and she tried to look anywhere that wasn’t up or forward. 

But that wasn’t exactly working.

Was that Luz she was smelling? What kind of cologne was that? She wore cologne? It was nice.  That, mixed with the smell of the shampoo, was almost intoxicating in a way. 

Luz flipped her hair to the side, giving that trademark charming smile with that stupid way she dragged her teeth along her bottom lip for half a second. It all made Madeline’s heart speed up a beat or two. But why? She didn’t like women like that. Maybe she didn’t view Luz as a woman?

Gee, that’s a shitty rationalization to jump to. Madeline thought the words, keeping them locked in her head.

“There’s a lot of sides of me you haven’t seen yet, Mads. But we can change that.” Her voice was deeper than usual, Maddie could swear to it. “Y’know, if you ever become interested.” Madeline felt humiliated that this was actually getting to her. She knew logically that this was all just to get back at her for poking fun at Luz in the first place. So, yeah, kinda should’ve seen something like this coming. 

But Madeline thought it was like how Luz and Darrel joke with each other. How Darrel will say something to her that’s provocative, and she’ll tell him to eat a dick, but in a ‘bros being bros’ kinda way. 

She put a hand on the top of Luz’s chest to gently push against her, adding a trilled laugh to her first word. “Yeah, okay. That would require me to find you attractive, cowgirl.” 

But then, Luz’s expression just dropped. Like it would 

In immediate response, so did Maddie’s. 

“Wow, um,” Luz backed away to put space between them, releasing a single, hurt breath. “Okay…” 

Madeline just froze for a good couple of seconds. 

What did she say? It was the truth. She wasn’t attracted to Luz, because she wasn’t attracted to women, and Luz knew that. Those two things were obviously going to line up. Maybe she thought Maddie was calling her unattractive, in a general sense? Anyone with eyes could see that wasn’t true, though. Not only that, Luz has always been super proud of her body. So why was right now such a blow for her and not something she could just laugh off?

Maddie reached her hand out. “Luz, I didn’t-” 

“No it’s- it’s cool.” Luz took another step back and kept looking to the side, clearing her throat and pulling her shirt down to cover her torso just a bit better. “I get it.” She nodded once, “I do.” 

“Okay…” Madeline said, just kind of leaving it at that. She didn’t know what else to say. She didn’t know what was going on. “Did you, um,” She narrowed her gaze a bit, “ Did you wanna-” Then, she pointed her thumb towards the door, “I mean, tonight, with-”

“No, I can’t.” Luz cut her off. “I have work. Patrolling.” 

“Right…” 

Another awkward pause.

Maddie took a couple steps back towards the door, the apologetic sensation never leaving her expression. “Well, I’m gonna head out. Gotta make sure Mel wakes up in time for our girls' night.” 

Luckily, it seemed like Luz had started to compose herself. She took a deep breath and returned to more of a neutral demeanor. “Yeah, well, you guys have fun. Take a shot or two for me.” 

Madeline seemed relieved when her friend at least started acting normal again. She giggled, “Luz, we always take shots for you. You don’t drink.” 

Luz shot her a friendly wink, “I know. Have fun tonight.”

“Thanks, we will!” With those final words, Madeline opened the door behind her and left the dorm room. All the way to the elevator, she couldn’t help but think about how weird that entire interaction ended up being. Had things changed that much with Luz in the past year? What hell even happened back there? 

Maddie tried shaking it off as she got onto the elevator.

One thing was for sure; she would certainly be drinking enough to try and forget whatever the fuck that was.

10pm - Shivers Bar & Club Singles Night

A glass hit the bar underneath, and Madeline let out a high pitched, ‘Woooo!’ as the first shot of alcohol cleared her esophagus. She was wearing a red silken dress with an open back that had strings that tie around the back of her neck. It flowed down to just above her knees. 

Melody laughed and put a hand on her shoulder. “Maddie! Easy, we just got here!” 

She turned to Melody and put an arm around her shoulder. “Hey! ‘Easy’ is for people who get to do this more than once every couple of months!” She took the second shot from the bar and held it out to the crowd as she turned both of them to face it. “We came out here to have a good time, and dammit, that’s exactly what we’re gonna do. So do me a favor and down this shit!” 

Madeline held the shot to Melody’s lips and tilted it back, to which Melody took the hint and opened her mouth, tilting her head back to let the drink flow down her throat. Maddie let out yet another cheer and put the now empty shot glass on the bar next to the other one. 

Mel put the back of her wrist up to her lips, holding in a laugh at her over-ecstatic best friend. “Now, let’s get you and the sweet, sweet ass out on the dance floor, girl!” They both laughed and Maddie grabbed Melody’s wrist, holding it in the air and swaying her hips while she danced out onto the floor to begin their night.

11:30pm - Shivers Bar & Club Singles Night…

Madeline leaned on the bar, downing her third shot of the night, and she was starting to feel it coming on. She let out a breath, and a laugh afterwards, exhausted but having the time of her life. 

“Hey, you here alone?!”

She heard a deep voice yell out over the music, and before even looking at the guy, smiled and retorted. “It’s singles night! What do you think?!” It was more of a playful tone than a snarky one. As she saw the guy for the first time, he looked pretty damn cute. Not the most built, but certainly not scrawny. 

“To actually answer your question,” she continued, “I came here with my friend. She’s, um,” Madeline looked around. Where was Mel? It was difficult to see over and past the crowd, but as a few more people cleared the way at the end of the song, she saw her. And a huge grin came across her face. 

Melody was on the other end of the bar, pressed against it, making out with a woman a few inches taller than her with raven black, shoulder length hair. “She’s busy.” Maddie said, turning back to the guy.

He looked down at her and smiled, leaning on the bar. “You and your friend come to singles nights together often?”

“Oh, it’s not what you think.” The music began to blare again as the next song started. It was difficult to convey the joking tone she wanted while talking over it, but she did her best. “She’s my manager!”

“Oh yeah?!” The guy played along.

Madeline nodded, “For sure! There’s some really raunchy stuff of me online! Girl’s gotta make a living, right?!” 

The guys face formed an over exaggerated expression of understanding. “Oh yeah, for sure, for sure!” Then broke out into a grin again. 

Maddie looked him up and down. Yeah, he passed the vibe check.

But before it could continue, she heard a familiar voice next to her. “Hey, Maddie!” 

She looked over to see Melody standing there, holding hands with the woman she was just making out with. “Hey, Mel!” There was most certainly a teasing lilt to the word that made her best friend roll her eyes and blush, smiling like she was caught with her hand caught where it wasn’t supposed to be, and where it most likely was just a couple minutes ago. 

“I’m gonna head back! I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?!” 

“Yeah, yeah, sure! Go on girl! Have fun!” Once again, a lilting, teasing cadance took over the last word, and Madeline watched as her friend walked out with her new date.

She looked back to the guy she was talking with, “So, where were we?”

12:30am - Shivers Bar & Club Singles Night…

Body’s were rubbing against each other. The music was pounding. More drinks were being ordered. More drinks were being consumed. At this point, it was safe to say that Madeline was drunk. Five shots in for a person that doesn’t regularly go out drinking was more than enough. 

She leaned back against the bar, making out with the guy she was dancing with. Turns out his name was Garrett, which she classily found out a few seconds before she started kissing him. They smiled into the kiss and he reached down, putting his hands on her waist and pulling her closer to him. “You feel fucking amazing, Maddie.”

“Mmm… Same do… you…” Well, it seemed like she was more drunk than she thought. But she’s been drunk before and that felt different than this. 

Her hand reached up to hold her forehead, “Woah-” And when she looked back at Garrett, everything seemed like it was spinning. His head wouldn’t stay in one place. Afterimages filled her vision when things passed her view. She was starting to see double. 

She heard Garrett’s voice, as if it was far off in the distance. Distorted. Like it was slowed down, but going faster somehow. “Maddie? You good?”

“No, I…” She reached into her pocket, her hand shakily pulling out her phone. “T-trouble… Gotta c-call… Some-” Her fingers tried their best to work on the digital keypad.

5… 8… 9…

But it was no use. Before she could do anything else, she dropped her phone and stumbled into the counter. The device clattered to the ground and Garrett reached out to grab her. “Woah, Maddie!” He steadied her on her feet as her head fell motionless backwards. 

Barely conscious, she heard another voice. A familiar voice. 

“Yo, what’s going on? Maddie? Maddie, you good?” Her head was held forward by someone different. It was Darrel. Darrel was here.

He looked at Garrett while keeping her head upright. “What the fuck happened?!”

“I don’t know, man! I think she was drugged or something.” Garrett seemed worried. Both for Maddie’s safety, and because he didn’t want anyone thinking he did it.

“Shit!” 

“We’ve been on the dancefloor for like, the past hour. Only coming back here and there to grab a quick drink- I swear, she’s been fine up until this point!” 

Darrel looked around on the bar for a second. He picked up a glass with his free hand and put it forcefully back down on the counter. “Are you fucking kidding me?! Yo! Bartender! No fucking drink covers on this shit; are you for real right now?! It’s a fuckin’ college town dipshit!” He pointed to the ground, “Hey yo, get her phone. Put it in her purse.” 

“Darrel…” Madeline slurred the name, pouting, and a couple of silent cries came from her throat. 

“I gotchu, babygirl, don’t worry. I gotchu.” He picked Maddie up and turned to Garrett. “Yo, Garrett! Call the cops, tell’em someone’s been drugged at Shivers. Give’em my address and-” He thought about it for a second, looked down at her, then shook his head. “Actually, nah, fuck that. Way too sus. I’m takin’ her to her room! Tell’em she’ll be in the junior and senior dorm!”

“Yeah, for sure man, I’m on it.” Garrett took out his phone and immediately started calling the police.

And that was the last thing Madeline remembered…

3:07am - Grayson Library Parking Lot

Luz sat in her patrol car with it turned on so that the heat was going. When it’s in the forties outside, saving on gas money during your break suddenly becomes a bit less important than staying warm. To help with that, she also had a coffee she picked up at a twenty-four hour diner down the street, too. 

Her phone dinged, and as she took another sip and looked down at it, she smirked and shook her head. The message appeared at the top of her screen, from one of her hookups this past year on campus, asking if she was DTF tonight. She went to move her thumb to click on the message, but she just hovered over it. 

She was conflicted. Ever since that talk with Maddie earlier, she couldn’t even let her mind wander anywhere else. It was like there was a blockade there, and it was something she couldn’t move past for some reason. Both the jealousy, and the stinging remark that Maddie didn’t find her attractive. For some reason, hearing that out loud from her friend, just stung. It was a constant parasite eating away at her brain. 

Luz shook her head and let the message on her phone stay unread. She clicked the device's screen off and looked back up through the windshield. “What’s wrong with me?” 

But she narrowed her gaze, squinting to try and see something in the distance. “The hell?” Out in the middle of the green just outside the library, she could barely see the figure of someone. From this distance, in the dark, it just looked like a shadow. It seemed like they were kneeling on the ground, maybe?

What were they doing out here?

Luz got out of her car and slammed the door shut. The sound echoed through the night air like the clap of thunder. Upon hearing it, the figure quickly got up and immediately began running off across the green, towards the main strip. 

“Hey!” Luz yelled out, trying to make out anything she could about the figure. Though it was harder to tell anything about it, she could, at the very least, see that they were wearing a baseball cap and were about, five-foot-four from the looks of it. Maybe five-foot-seven or five-foot-eight?

She started jogging towards the figure, though it was obvious with their headstart that she wasn’t going to catch them. When the security officer got ten or so yards away from where they were originally kneeling down, she watched them round the corner and leave her line of sight. 

Luz shakes her head, then looks down a bit and sees another figure. Her eyes squint, and she instinctively reaches for her walkie. “This is campus security badge two-five-six out on the green outside of Grayson Library. I got a possible two-forty, requesting local law enforcement.”

The radio immediately came back with a voice. “Heard, two-five-six. Contacting law enforcement and backup will be there shortly.”

She began pulling out her flashlight. “Yo, you alright?” When she clicked it on and the circular light came to life, it was pointed down at the ground at her feet. Instinctively, Luz looked down.

She squinted, trying to make out what the wind had just blown against her pants.

It was hair. Auburn hair.

Her breath sped up and she slowly pointed her flashlight up and along the ground. Her voice was almost caught in her throat, and she began walking fast towards the unmoving figure. “Hey, I said ‘are you alright’!”

As Luz got closer, her worst fears became a reality. 

With chunks of hair cut off, and an excess amount of blood from the multiple stab wounds to her chest…

It was Melody.

“Oh my god-!” Luz rushed over, pulling her walkie up to her mouth, the tears already starting to well up in a panic. “I need EMT’s! EMT’s- SEND EMT’s!” Her voice broke as she shouted into the device, then threw it on the ground. 

She practically slid down next to her as she collapsed to her knees, reaching out and turning Melody’s face towards her to look into her eyes. “Mel! Mel, look at me!” 

She did; but there was nothing there. Her eyes were as cold as her skin. 

Luz put her hands on the wounds, pressing down hard to try and stop the bleeding. “Don’t do this! C’mon, don’t do this!” She pressed down again, looking at the blood seeping through her fingers and overtop her hands, then back to Melody’s face. Tears began to run down her cheeks. “Fuck- Mel, c’mon!” 

As she cried, she leaned down to put her face just inches away from her friend’s as she whispered to her. The vacant stare that gazed back surely burned into her mind forever. “C’mon, what do you want, huh? W-what do you want me to do? Y-you want me to say that I love you? I- I do, okay? I love you. I love you so fucking much, Mel, just please don’t fucking do this to me- Please, God don’t do this…” 

Her words were strained, said in the middle of sobs as her hands came up to caress Melody’s face. The blood smeared on her extremely pale, lifeless skin as Luz’s thumb gently stroked her cheek. 

Luz looked out all around her and screamed as loud as she could. “HELP! SOMEONE HELP!”

She looked back to the body of what was once her friend. “God, no,” Luz began to cry uncontrollably. “No, no, please no…” She reached down and cradled Melody in her arms, bringing her up to hold her close. To embrace her one last time. “Please don’t go…” The blood began to soak into her uniform, but Luz didn’t care. She rocked back and forth, holding the corpse of one of the only people on this earth she could ever truly say she had loved.

The only sounds left in the dead of night were the whining of incoming sirens, and the sobs of a broken woman… 

[nervouswhizkid]

i. am so mad. i'm mad at season 4 and at every one of you that interacted with my last post abt vld season 3. i know u were all sitting there giggling at me as i walked into s4 knowing full well it was going to destroy me. no WARNING??? i don't even want to sit down and write about it, i'm gonna start crying all over again

i hate that keith left the team. i have to actually practice breathing techniques right now because it's making me so mad omg. i know i said last time that voltron without lance was unthinkable, but i didn't mean that keith should leave. THAT IS NOT WHAT I WANTED!!!! that also means that there was less keith (and klance) content this season, which i take personally. they did that to hurt me specifically. and on top of that, the team was being so mean about keith's wavering priorities. i feel like when anything goes wrong, with lance and keith specifically, everyone is so mean to them??? god forbid they make a mistake or have personal struggles, DAMN

i feel like this screencap says it all.

guys how about let's talk to each other instead of being passive aggressive and icing people out (i do want to point out though that lance seems more sad/disappointed here than anything. my little klance heart is breaking 😭) AND THIS SCENE??

the moment i realized keith was about to walk in my stomach dropped. they all look so angry and here comes Mister Puppy Eyes McGee. i actually can't take it that's my son everyone leave him alone!!! 🤺🤺🤺🤺 i know they had a big group hug after but that's not good enough for me, they should have tied keith up or handcuffed him to the ship, or something. WHY ARE WE LETTING HIM GO WITH THE BLADE OHMYGODDDD

look at this, like??

the camera setup is what gets me. you have keith smiling with all of his friends in the background and then it swaps to a dark, yawning hallway with the most heartbreaking frown on his face. that doesn't look like someone sure of their decisions to me. this boy is in pain!! i'm also just confused about shiro being able to pilot the black lion. maybe confused isn't the right word, but i'm not sure how to describe it. i'm not convinced?? black already denied him, so why now? i kinda feel like it would've been better had he not tried to reconnect with her at the end of last season, because there was no suspense for me this time. the moment he decided to go try again i was like "oh it's gonna work this time isn't it" i get that it's likely black could sense keith's internal struggles and feel him pulling away and maybe that's why she gave shiro a second chance, but shiro becoming the black paladin again gave keith the excuse to leave, because why do they need him now? they have a black paladin, and it's not him. but to me, it should have been. he went through all of that growth last season, and for what?? just to abandon them when things get rocky?? ugh, i hate this!!

i can't even talk about episode 2 without crying, so just know that i'm sitting here with tears streaming down my face as i write this. i was really excited to finally get some closure on the whole pidge-missing-family mystery, considering that's been a subplot since the beginning of the show. as much as this episode broke my heart, i really did love it. they executed it so well. the scene where pidge lands on that planet with the graves? and they're running and pleading for it to not be true, all the flashbacks of cherished memories and images of matt? dropping to her knees in front of his grave in disbelief??

now that's fucking cinema. you best believe i was bawling my eyes out the whole time. i have a little sister and our relationship is very similar to pidge and matt's, so this was just excruciating. i'm very glad he wasn't actually dead, but part of me almost wishes he was? that sounds SO dark, i hope you guys get what i mean. they just put the audience through the absolute wringer and then they're like "oh, actually he's still alive LOL gotcha!" and that makes me really happy for pidge, but man, what a plot twist that would have been. they've been searching for their brother all this time, so you expect some kind of payoff for dedicating so much time to that storyline, but what if he was just dead?? and there was nothing she could do?? wow this is painful to talk about why did i start watching this show if there's a fic where someone explores that possibility then pls share, for some reason i want to torture myself again, i just love how they did this episode. it's very trope-y, but sometimes you just have to lean into it and enjoy, and this was one of those times

the classic fighting-each-other-unknowingly and middle-of-the-fight-identity-reveal? i'll eat it up every time!!

real talk though why is matt so attractive 😏

soo, zarkon is back. fantastic. do he and haggar just not care about each other?? they haven't mentioned the fact that they're married at all and haggar basically still acts like his loyal follower. i'd entertain the thought that maybe it's been so long that it just doesn't really matter to them anymore, but haggar sounded like she actually cared when she realized they were husband and wife last season. but now it's like nothing happened?? i don't expect them to act all lovey-dovey, but there wasn't even a single line of acknowledgment. and i still cannot understand what lotor's plans are. what is his agenda? he wasn’t bothered at all by zarkon reclaiming the throne, and even went to the trouble to make them think he cared. he got that comet and made a couple of ships, but i still don't know what he plans to do with them. also– i can't believe he killed narti!! i know, i was literally just talking about how she specifically frustrated me, but i was so not expecting their death. i get why he did it, but now the rest of his group doesn't trust him.

i'd say that the one bright spot in this season was episode four. that episode was just so silly and gave me so much secondhand-embarrassment i actually had to look away at times LMAO is this where we got the whole Loverboy Lance and Lone Wolf Keith thing from?? i thought that was purely fandom-made, i was not expecting to hear that in an actual episode. talk about whiplash. and we got this ICONIC scene:

he did that wayyy too naturally. lance, buddy, got anything to share?

i really would have loved to see keith with the team during that episode. i can just imagine how he would've reacted to having to do all of that stuff. god, that would've been hysterical!! the images of the parasite in coran's brain made me gag though, was that really necessary🧍‍♀️

i don't have a ton to say about the final episodes. i mean, it was two episodes of them fighting on naxzela. it was definitely a bit of an avengers endgame feeling with all people they helped in previous seasons showing up to fight, so that was cool! i'm curious as to what purpose naxzela served to the galra empire though. were they always planning to use it as a bomb? and couldn't they still do that technically? they only broke the witches connection with it, so all they'd have to do is get another ship out there and she could do it again. what do you even do with a planet like that?? just destroy it?? i also just want to point out that lance said they should get out of there immediately, and nobody listened!! and then five seconds later they were like "oh no, we need to get out of here!" justice for lance i stg ohmygod and LOTOR is on their side now?!?!?! i actually can't wait to see how this plays out!! total transparency, i love atla and i could absolutely see this being a zuko redemption arc situation. it's clear his parents don't like him at all (are they actually heartless or something??) so why not join the other side!! I'M HERE FOR IT

i have to be honest, this definitely wasn't my favorite season. we're getting into the later seasons and i've heard plenty about how the writing goes a little left-field (though i'm not sure when that happens. most people seem to agree season 8 is shit, but i've heard complaints about s6-7 as well) so we'll just have to see! i'm sticking it out as best i can🚶‍♀️‍➡️ onto season 5!

[thenexusofsouls]

"Well if I failed it, that means I didn't learn it, right? I dunno, though, honestly, real life's not like school. They try to tell you, 'Memorize these eighteen vocab words or you'll grow up a loser and won't get a job,' but really... as an adult, if you wanna know somethin', you look it the hell up." Wade really thought that today's American schools were doin' a real disservice to kids, with the memory recall and repetition techniques instead of teaching them important things like critical and independent thinking.

"I think 'steada teachin' kids to memorize shit, we should be teachin' 'em life skills, like how to use a library or a computer, how to do your taxes, how to manage your finances, stick to a budget, how to ask the right questions, basic email etiquette, how to network socially, how to make a resume, that kinda stuff. That's the stuff you need to know to be a functional adult, not what sphenopalatine ganglioneuralgia means." There was a quiet beat and then, "Brain freeze. That's what it means. You know, like when you eat ice cream too fast? I just love sayin' it, that's the only reason I know it," he said with a chuckle. "I dunno, I learn better by doin', not by readin' or studyin'. There's no substitute for life experience, man."

He saw Rockland's energy be taken down a peg about being a responsible person, and he understood why. "Yeah, I know, bein' responsible's no fun, and it sucks that you've gotta do it so young, but it really is admirable. And it'll give you a leg up later in life, definitely. You're already ahead of most kids just because you pay attention to all this stuff they don't. So keep that in mind. It sucks, but it pays off, trust me," he tried to say by way of encouragement and cheering the kid up a bit. Sometimes life gave you lemons, but if you learned how to make lemonade out of them early on, you were better off later.

As the conversation shifted to Rockland's mom, Wade could see the conflict in the young boy's eyes. He shrugged at little at his assumption that her leaving meant she didn't care. "Eh, not necessarily. People leave for all sorts of reasons. Sometimes it's not even really under their control. For example... I once was paid to find a guy who'd completely disappeared. His family was lookin' for him, he owed all this money, he let all his bills lapse, that sorta thing. Guy was gone for years. His family was thinkin' he was a total jerk and just took off to start a new life somewhere. Turns out he actually did. I found him a couple states over livin' a completely different life. Here's the catch, though... The guy had been in a car accident, got a head injury, and suffered almost total amnesia. He didn't know who the hell was and started over again somewhere else. Isn't that wild? So it's not always that people don't care. There can be a lotta reasons why someone leaves."

Wade started chuckling as Rockland asked him if he slept. "I'm not Dracula, buddy. Yeah, I sleep. I just usually do it from morning to late afternoon 'steada at night, that's all. So I'm not tired right now, I just got up a few hours ago. I just didn't wanna get you into any trouble keepin' you out late. Also I'm not lookin' to be accused of kidnappin'. That'd kinda look bad on my resume, you know?" he joked.

Well that caught their attention alright. A middle finger had shot into the air, directed at a group of teens across the street who were hovering by a Duncan Donuts long closed for the night. The boy beneath the hoodie, propelling said finger, sneered. Just like that, the group of five moved towards him, the tallest, Shacks, sauntering forward with an irritating air of confidence. And to think, there'd been a time when Rockland had thought he was cool.

"You can't seriously blame us, Rocky." He looked to the others with cruel amusement, "It was a prank, get a sense of hum-" Too busy searching for the favour of his crew, he'd missed the draw of the younger teen's fist before it met his cheek.

"Prank my ass, I could've been arres-oof." Rockland was tackled by Archie, the smallest of the bunch, who was about a head shorter than he was, but kinda stalky for his age, and with the element of surprise on his side. Cane clattering out of hand, and across the sidewalk, the lanky teen scraped across the pavement, electric pain radiating up from his tailbone. He caught the breath that had been knocked out of him just in time to catch the thump of a fist to the nose in return. - For Wade

Wade didn't know what to make of this city yet. He'd only been here a couple days and was still trying to get his bearings. It wasn't a bad city, he thought, just cold. Just... really cold when you're alone, like all cities are. Nevertheless, Wade did some hunting and stocked up on other supplies, always wanting to stay on the move. That's how he got jobs, and that's how he kept sane.

Tonight had been quiet enough so far... that is until he heard sounds of a fight. But a fight... between kids? Was he hearing this right? Wade made his way toward the sounds, and sure enough, some kids whose parents were absent and whose bedtimes must be fast-approaching were going at it. Or rather, several kids were beating up on one unfortunate one.

"Hey! Come on, cut it out, what the hell're you guys doin'?!" Wade yelled, hoping to scatter the bullies. "You know better than this, get off him! Don't make me call the cops!" he said, watching as they all scattered... save for one. Wade knelt down beside the boy lying on the ground. "Hey, buddy, you okay?" he asked gently.

[lafflanes]

[greenerteacups]

oooh please someday tell us what you think of GOT

oh, no, it's my fatal weakness! it's [checks notes] literally just the bare modicum of temptation! okay you got me.

SO. in order to tell what's wrong with game of thrones you kind of have to have read the books, because the books are the reason the show goes off the rails. i actually blame the showrunners relatively little in proportion to GRRM for how bad the show was (which I'm not gonna rehash here because if you're interested in GOT in any capacity you've already seen that horse flogged to death). people debate when GOT "got bad" in terms of writing, but regardless of when you think it dropped off, everyone agrees the quality declined sharply in season 8, and to a certain extent, season 7. these are the seasons that are more or less entirely spun from whole cloth, because season 7 marks the beginning of what will, if we ever see it, be the Winds of Winter storyline. it's the first part that isn't based on a book by George R.R. Martin. it's said that he gave the showrunners plot outlines, but we don't know how detailed they were, or how much the writers diverged from the blueprint — and honestly, considering the cumulative changes made to the story by that point, some stark divergence would have been required. (there's a reason for this. i'll get there in a sec.)

so far, i'm not saying anything all that original. a lot of people recognized how bad the show got as soon as they ran out of Book to adapt. (I think it's kind of weird that they agreed to make a show about an unfinished series in the first place — did GRRM figure that this was his one shot at a really good HBO adaptation, and forego misgivings about his ability to write two full books in however many years it took to adapt? did he think they would wait for him? did he not care that the series would eventually spoil his magnum opus, which he's spent the last three decades of his life writing? perplexing.) but the more interesting question is why the show got bad once it ran out of Book, because in my mind, that's not a given. a lot of great shows depart from the books they were based on. fanfiction does exactly that, all the time! if you have good writers who understand the characters they're working with, departure means a different story, not a worse one. now, the natural reply would be to say that the writers of GOT just aren't good, or at least aren't good at the things that make for great television, and that's why they needed the books as a structure, but I don't think that's true or fair, either. books and television are very different things. the pacing of a book is totally different from the pacing of a television show, and even an episodic book like ASOIAF is going to need a lot of work before it's remotely watchable as a series. bad writers cannot make great series of television, regardless of how good their source material is. sure, they didn't invent the characters of tyrion lannister and daenerys targaryen, but they sure as hell understood story structure well enough to write a damn compelling season of TV about them!

so but then: what gives? i actually do think it's a problem with the books! the show starts out as very faithful to the early books (namely, A Game of Thrones and A Clash of Kings) to the point that most plotlines are copied beat-for-beat. the story is constructed a little differently, and it's definitely condensed, but the meat is still there. and not surprisingly, the early books in ASOIAF are very tightly written. for how long they are, you wouldn't expect it, but on every page of those books, the plot is racing. you can practically watch george trying to beat the fucking clock. and he does! useful context here is that he originally thought GOT was going to be a trilogy, and so the scope of most threads in the first book or two would have been much smaller. it also helps that the first three books are in some respects self-contained stories. the first book is a mystery, the second and third are espionage and war dramas — and they're kept tight in order to serve those respective plots.

the trouble begins with A Feast for Crows, and arguably A Storm of Swords, because GRRM starts multiplying plotlines and treating the series as a story, rather than each individual book. he also massively underestimated the number of pages it would take him to get through certain plot beats — an assumption whose foundation is unclear, because from a reader's standpoint, there is a fucke tonne of shit in Feast and Dance that's spurious. I'm not talking about Brienne's Riverlands storyline (which I adore thematically but speaking honestly should have been its own novella, not a part of Feast proper). I'm talking about whole chapters where Tyrion is sitting on his ass in the river, just talking to people. (will I eat crow about this if these pay off in hugely satisfying ways in Winds or Dream? oh, totally. my brothers, i will gorge myself on sweet sweet corvid. i will wear a dunce cap in the square, and gleefully, if these turn out to not have been wastes of time. the fact that i am writing this means i am willing to stake a non-negligible amount of pride on the prediction that that will not happen). I'm talking about scenes where the characters stare at each other and talk idly about things that have already happened while the author describes things we already have seen in excruciating detail. i'm talking about threads that, while forgivable in a different novel, are unforgivable in this one, because you are neglecting your main characters and their story. and don't tell me you think that a day-by-day account tyrion's river cruise is necessary to telling his story, because in the count of monte cristo, the main guy disappears for nine years and comes hurtling back into the story as a vengeful aristocrat! and while time jumps like that don't work for everything, they certainly do work if what you're talking about isn't a major story thread!

now put aside whether or not all these meandering, unconcluded threads are enjoyable to read (as, in fairness, they often are!). think about them as if you're a tv showrunner. these bad boys are your worst nightmare. because while you know the author put them in for a reason, you haven't read the conclusion to the arc, so you don't know what that reason is. and even if the author tells you in broad strokes how things are going to end for any particular character (and this is a big "if," because GRRM's whole style is that he lets plots "develop as he goes," so I'm not actually convinced that he does have endings written out for most major characters), that still doesn't help you get them from point A (meandering storyline) to point B (actual conclusion). oh, and by the way, you have under a year to write this full season of television, while GRRM has been thinking about how to end the books for at least 10. all of this means you have to basically call an audible on whether or not certain arcs are going to pay off, and, if they are, whether they make for good television, and hence are worth writing. and you have to do that for every. single. unfinished. story. in the books.

here's an example: in the books, Quentin Martell goes on a quest to marry Daenerys and gain a dragon. many chapters are spent detailing this quest. spoiler alert: he fails, and he gets charbroiled by dragons. GRRM includes this plot to set up the actions of House Martell in Winds, but the problem is that we don't know what House Martell does in Winds, because (see above) the book DNE. So, although we can reliably bet that the showrunners understand (1) Daenerys is coming to Westeros with her 3 fantasy nukes, and (2) at some point they're gonna have to deal with the invasion of frozombies from Canada, that DOESN'T mean they necessarily know exactly what's going to happen to Dorne, or House Martell. i mean, fuck! we don't even know if Martin knows what's going to happen to Dorne or House Martell, because he's said he's the kind of writer who doesn't set shit out beforehand! so for every "Cersei defaults on millions of dragons in loans from the notorious Bank of Nobody Fucks With Us, assumes this will have no repercussions for her reign or Westerosi politics in general" plotline — which might as well have a big glaring THIS WILL BE IMPORTANT stamp on top of the chapter heading — you have Arianne Martell trying to do a coup/parent trap switcheroo with Myrcella, or Euron the Goffick Antichrist, or Faegon Targaryen and JonCon preparing a Blackfyre restoration, or anything else that might pan out — but might not! And while that uncertainty about what's important to the "overall story" might be a realistic way of depicting human beings in a world ruled by chance and not Destiny, it makes for much better reading than viewing, because Game of Thrones as a fantasy television series was based on the first three books, which are much more traditional "there is a plot and main characters and you can generally tell who they are" kind of book. I see Feast and Dance as a kind of soft reboot for the series in this respect, because they recenter the story around a much larger cast and cast a much broader net in terms of which characters "deserve" narrative attention.

but if you're making a season of television, you can't do that, because you've already set up the basic premise and pacing of your story, and you can't suddenly pivot into a long-form tone poem about the horrors of war. so you have to cut something. but what are you gonna cut? bear in mind that you can't just Forget About Dorne, or the Iron Islands, or the Vale, or the North, or pretty much any region of the story, because it's all interconnected, but to fit in everything from the books would require pacing of the sort that no reasonable audience would ever tolerate. and bear in mind that the later books sprout a lot more of these baby-plots that could go somewhere, but also might end up being secondary or tertiary to the "main story," which, at the end of the day, is about dragons and ice zombies and the rot at the heart of the feudal power system glorified in classical fantasy. that's the story that you as the showrunner absolutely must give them an end to, and that's the story that should be your priority 1.

so you do a hack and slash job, and you mortar over whatever you cut out with storylines that you cook up yourself, but you can't go too far afield, because you still need all the characters more or less in place for the final showdown. so you pinch here and push credulity there, and you do your best to put the characters in more or less the same place they would have been if you kept the original, but on a shorter timeframe. and is it as good as the first seasons? of course not! because the material that you have is not suited to TV like the first seasons are. and not only that, but you are now working with source material that is actively fighting your attempt to constrain a linear and well-paced narrative on it. the text that you're working with changed structure when you weren't looking, and now you have to find some way to shanghai this new sprawling behemoth of a Thing into a television show. oh, and by the way, don't think that the (living) author of the source material will be any help with this, because even though he's got years of experience working in television writing, he doesn't actually know how all of these threads will tie together, which is possibly the reason that the next book has taken over 8 years (now 13 and counting) to write. oh and also, your showrunners are sick of this (in fairness, very difficult) job and they want to go write for star wars instead, so they've refused the extra time the studio offered them for pre-production and pushed through a bunch of first-draft scripts, creating a crunch culture of the type that spawns entirely avoidable mistakes, like, say, some poor set designer leaving a starbucks cup in frame.

anyway, that's what I think went wrong with game of thrones.

[skeletalheartattack]

hi I like gelato a lot

[welcometogrouchland]

[ID in alt text] my magnum opus

[thevegetablewhichnoonedaresname]

I'm starting Mission to Zyxx Season 5 now, and I have feelings about that.

First, it generally scares me when people hype anything up at all because there is no guarantee that anyone values the exact same thing I do to the same degree. Even if I trust the creators of a thing to value something and try to do right by it, that doesn't always necessarily mean it will be successful, especially if that involves doing something wildly different than what made it good in the first place (I have been burned this way before). I guess I'm just hoping they continue the format of goofy improv shenanigans for the majority of it with something more planned and emotional in the finale if they want, like they've been doing all along. I'd think they would, and I've heard nothing bad about the ending, but I guess it still makes me nervous because I'm so close to the end and I want it so badly to stick the landing. I'm setting my expectations on the floor so I can be surprised instead of disappointed, but honestly, I don't need it to be better, I just need it to be on par with the rest.

Second, and more briefly, I'm happy it's (hopefully) ending before it has a chance to decline. I am so on board with that philosophy. But on the other hand, finishing a thing that I really, really like and knowing there's not another one out there gives me a special kind of heartache. Like, I know there will be other good media, and stuff that's good and unique in other ways, but I know for a fact that there are no other podcasts out there that have the same mix of a balance of off-the-wall improv and structured narrative, quality comedy, fantastical sci-fi setting and loveable characters, and high quality production. There are other things out there with many of those qualities, but nothing that checks every one of those boxes. It's a lightning-in-a-bottle thing that very much feels like the right people had to be in the right place at the right time to do it. Attempts to do it again would feel hollow because it had to be born out of necessity and passion and the talents of the people involved, so if you switch out the people it loses the reasons it's great, and if the same people tried to do it again it'd feel tired. That makes me so, so grateful it exists, but also so, so sad that it doesn't, and I'm 80% of the way done. When it's over, it's over.

Anyway. Now that that's all out there, I'm just gonna finish listening and have fun. Wish me luck.

[deus-ex-mona]

me rn:

[triglycercule]

i love doodling swapinverse like hello drawing characters aside from the normal mtt is lowkey therapeutic 🧡🧡🧡 anyways i FINALLY FINALLY finished crash's lore!!!! and vice.SER is connected to him,,,, theyre interconnected!!! i forgot how much i liked crash's design (not the design but all the little gimmicks in the design. figuring out all the hanging ribbon bits is annoying but hey it looks good)

[medicinemane]

There's honestly... just so many people, just so so so so so many people in this world where I'm like... aren't you people tired of this fucking... you know, I was going to call them clowns but that's really disrespectful to clowns, these people could never get their face on an egg...

Anyway, aren't you tired of this childish jackass? Don't you just want to ignore them and never have to hear about them again? If we just ignored them they legitimately would go away... don't you want that?

And this applies to... just ungodly amounts of people, from jake paul to even elon musk (just... don't touch his shit, he'll run out of money eventually with how bad he is with it), to just... name an annoying famous person and you'll name someone I've literally forgotten right now that I could never have to hear about again if people would just ignore them (unless they committed crimes, investigators are welcome to pay attention while gathering a case)

Yet the answer's always "no, we're paying so much attention to them!" and I'm just like... why? Why would you watch jake paul box? I heard about that and was like "he's still doing that shit?", and yet I guess it made a lot of money yet again and it's just like... ignore him

These people could go away, and yet

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[heatmiiiiser]

Ggrrr I wish disenchantment was better. I binged it all because I'm sick somebody talk to me about this.

[fiendishartist2]

guys what if i want to make my own apollo justice game.

[sharknark]

i'm the worst kind of bts elitist, i insist dark & wild is their best album, i brag about liking the prologue mix of butterfly better, i'm the bitch crying about how shit butter is and how "i miss when they were hip hop"