#theres a whole bunch of cats that are rats

[silverboughed]

[just-some-random-blogger]

omgomg modern!daemon's nonnie's really lucky. i'm excited to see the thing you were writing. 'LOVE LETTER TIME' ANY TIME DESERVES TO BE LOVE LETTER TIME 'im sending brain cells your way' thanks hottie-cutie-meanie. actually, i'm pretty good at math too. the problem was that tasks were not hard but a lot. 'i cant believe you still have to study in the cold' well 'you're too old to be afraid of this weather' said one very kind deputy head. yes i've been living in such conditions for my whole life but?? girl?? have you ever heard smth about being ill??? thanks for the hug! i hope i'll see this girl alive TT and i do sleep during the day a little (imagine angry emoji) 'i shower you with compliments more like my cat' can i be your cat TT if i can't have one, maybe i can be one TT you know, pretend untilit's real. no but just imagine being allergic to yourself... 'i have two! yushi and his son jinjin' OMG aaaaaaaa such cuties TT omg i'm gonna cry again. i beg you to show your cats plspls i can call you master (as a cat) or big sister or hannah smith (as a matt smith's spouse) but plss TT my only goal in the whole life is to see the cats every person i know owns. (is jinjin after jinjin from astro or am i being crazy?..) and i have a really-super-indeed important academic competition(?) on the 19.12 so if you're going to post something i'll probably read it later but!! i will!! wait for me pls good morning!! take care! love you <з meow

HEWWOW!!

love letter time 😌

omgomg modern!daemon's nonnie's really lucky. i'm excited to see the thing you were writing.

lol i was writing for another fandom HAHAHH idk if you'd care for it it was my hob x endless!reader fic for the show the sandman lololol you don't have to check it out if it doesn't entice you lololl

'LOVE LETTER TIME' ANY TIME DESERVES TO BE LOVE LETTER TIME

lol well, realistically speaking i cant be sending you love letters any time lol HAHHAHAH

'im sending brain cells your way' thanks hottie-cutie-meanie. actually, i'm pretty good at math too. the problem was that tasks were not hard but a lot. 'i cant believe you still have to study in the cold' well

SLAYYYYYYYYY BESTIEEEEEEE WE LOVE A MATH WHIZZZZZZ

'you're too old to be afraid of this weather' said one very kind deputy head. yes i've been living in such conditions for my whole life but?? girl?? have you ever heard smth about being ill??? thanks for the hug! i hope i'll see this girl alive TT

DOES THAT DEPUTY MEAN OLD PEOPLE DONT HAVE FEELINGS this is why we cant have nice things T_T they want us to repress our emotions //: rat //: and yeah haven't you ever hear of being ill? yuck ALSO DAMN I HOPE YOU SEE THAT GIRL ALIVE TOO MY GOSH T_T HUGS HUGS HUGS

and i do sleep during the day a little (imagine angry emoji)

AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHH THATS SO CUTE HAHAHHAAH

'i shower you with compliments more like my cat' can i be your cat TT if i can't have one, maybe i can be one TT you know, pretend untilit's real. no but just imagine being allergic to yourself...

T_T lol sure you can be my cat AHAHHAHHAh im pretty sure if you were a cat you wouldn't be allergic to yourself T_T did you know theres actually a cat that people who are allergic to them can have because apparently they dont have that gene that makes people allergic. i show it on animal planet once but i dont remember what its called lol i researched it an apparently there was a bunch but i think the one i watched was about the russian blue cat HAHHAH fitting for you i think

'i have two! yushi and his son jinjin' OMG aaaaaaaa such cuties TT omg i'm gonna cry again. i beg you to show your cats

ok i went through my pictures to see show you some

this is yushi he used to have a brother named mochi but he got hit my a van and i will never stop mourning him. the right most pic is yushi (left) and mochi (right)

(i went into the depth to look for a photo of mochi and then i realized i didnt have any anymore, and then when i found some i started crying because i was mochi's favorite and he didnt deserve what happened to him i miss him so much im so sad i cant stop crying hold on) i found the last video and photo i had of him but he had a gaping wound in it so im not going to add it T_T

this is jinjin yushi's baby

the story of how we got him is pretty long, but i'll tell you to distract from my sobs. so we have a stray girl cat in our neighborhood and im pretty sure yushi got her pregnant lol thats so funny to say but its true.

this was jinjin when we got him (he fell from the roof and had a broken leg but we didnt have money to bring him to the vet so i just gave him a makeshift cast and prayed he'd get better (he did)) he was so skinny and touch deprived T_T im crying again but he's better now

this is him after a while and his leg was better and he's with ysuhi in the first pic. we though yushi would try to kill him at first but they're so sweet to each other T_T i cant stop crying

honestly i swear im not making this up but jinjin is so much like mochi that i think God sent him to ease my sorrows T_T its genuinely so crazy how alike they are T_T i miss mochi so much im so sorry mochi. when he got hit i was so scared to watch him die and i regret not being with him in his last moments so badly im sorry i had to tell you this i wont go on about anymore

this is jinjin now

he's such a prince

this is my neighbors dog brownie she is a good girl

plspls i can call you master (as a cat) or big sister or hannah smith (as a matt smith's spouse) but plss TT my only goal in the whole life is to see the cats every person i know owns.

you can call me whatever you want. i choked on the water i was drinkin when i saw hannah smith but im too sad to type that with excitement

(is jinjin after jinjin from astro or am i being crazy?..)

actually no but its so wild that you also know astro slay bestie. we actually thought jinjin was a girl so i named him after characters from genshin impact his full name was barbara jean ponyo (ponyo as in the anime) but then he was a boy so i was like lol jean is fine or gene in masc form then it became jinjin. my sister cringes everytime we talk about astro jinjin now lol HAHA

and i have a really-super-indeed important academic competition(?) on the 19.12 so if you're going to post something i'll probably read it later but!! i will!! wait for me pls good morning!! take care! love you <з meow

WOW MY BIG BRAIN CHILD IS AN ACADEMIC COMPETITOR SLAAYYY <3 i hope it went well i love you so much

ps if you apologize about making me cry cos i went through mochi's photos i will cry some more

xxx im luv u

[defiantinsect]

Are mammalians “based on” a certain animal? For example, a character having traits similar to a cat or dog. Or is it just “general mammal-adjacent creature”

theres a bunch of strains that have different genes from different families, so they are based on certain animals. the squid sisters are some mix of mustelid + ursidae but others can get things like rat + pig (pearl) or stranger things like thylacine + opossum (acht). theres also super strains that are essentially gene soups where theres a whole bunch of families involved and these mammalians are usually a lot bigger and less visibly "were once humanoid at one point". marina gets infected with one of these strains :)

[212-apricity]

Okay I’m finally here! I wanted so badly to read it when you posted but I was so freaking tired I crashed 😭 But I’m here with another rant/essay of thoughts and emotions haha I feel like with every chapter I write more and more 😂

Getting a glimpse into Conrad’s head in any fic itches my brain nicely, idk I just love him?? Anywho, the way you write his like emotions and his anger/frustration? I’m here for it, he deserves to be a little upset instead of just shutting himself down to protect himself 🥺🖤 BUT him tracking Dean down and punching him before the ass can even get a word in?! Yes!! Thank you omg, protector Conrad getting his emotions out AND making sure Dean knows he’s not welcome anymore? no and then he comes home and tucks us in??? After beating a guy up?? God I’m feral for him I need therapy 😂

Him and his moms? (Bc lbr Susannah x Laurel is the real otp here 😭🖤) I tear up every time Susannah’s cancer gets brought up bc of personal stuffs so like Conrad crying on her and letting himself feel bc he didn’t mean to hurt us while his mom was sick?? My eyes were sweating I wanna give him cuddles and back rubs and forehead kisses 🥺😭🖤🖤

Steven would be that person tho “oh don’t worry I watched the cooking channel I can do this!” And then fucks it all to hell 😂 I love him, I feel like Steven and I would be those besties that are complete idiots together because we share half a braincell 😂

And Connie calling us my girl?!?! AND baby?!! That shit gives me butterflies omg 😭😭 im so lonely lmfao ahh the whole living room scene has me in a choke hold I love him, just ahhhhh the domesticity of caring for your lover after he beats someone up for you 🥺🖤

The almost kiss on the beach had me swooning too 😭 Fucking Steven and cockblocking us 😂😂

MATCHING TATTOOS AHHH 😩😩

No but who tf does Thérèse think she is???? “Sorry I stole your bf I was jealous but I ended things with him” like good for you but stay away lmao like that trust would be so damaged!!! Thérèse and Dean really do deserve each other 😤😤

Okay but us hitting Dean? And just being a feral cat about him not shutting up? Yes please?! Couples who beat shitty exes up together are top tier 😂 (I know we’re not a couple yet but in my heart Conrad’s already my husband 😂🖤) AND AGAIN the of checking over each others wounds?!!! I love them, your honor. 🖤🖤

Okay but Connie immediately wanting to take off and beat the shit out of Dean, while the love of his life’s injured??? But his tunnel vision is just like “gotta kill this guy”?? Like you idiot I don’t want Jere to take me to the hospital I want the person that makes me feel safe there 😭😭😭

Overall I love how theres a bunch of little moments showing how we love each other but it doesn’t feel forced or too fast? Like obviously Conrad and her just wanna kiss (damn you Steven) but also they’re comfortable just existing together too because they both know they care?? Does that make sense? Is that even what you were going for? Idk but that’s how I’m feeling it rn, maybe it’s just my craving for love that’s reading in too deep 😂😂

AHHH 😭 Anyway thank you again for another glorious chapter, I love it, I adore you, and I’m so so excited for more! I can’t wait to see the moms reactions to their tattoos (and for getting into a fight and getting injured 💀😂) and just for more shenanigans in general with everyone 🖤🖤😭

oh. my gosh. STOP I LOVE THESE COMMENT THINGYS SM THEYRE SO FUN.

ok so i totally agree, dean is a RAT he deserves whatever happens to him ik i wrote the damn thing but i stand w it🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️

no but fr someone needed to humble dean and thérèse both like they’re so annoying. i didn’t want thérèse to have a giant monologue just explaining why she did what she did bc honestly people like that don’t rly say all that much irl, they’re just looking for ways to get back in ur life and mess it up again tbh and she was just annoying too like

and i mean i didn’t wanna say it myself but yes the main characters here ARE susannah and laurel, glad we cleared that up. they’re literally so cutesy and wonderful i love them sm

STEVENS SO FUNNY STOP- hes literally hilarious i love him sm

no honestly i love the living room scene too it’s so cutesy and domestic i thought those two needed a tiny little cute relaxed moment before it all went down tbh💀💀

and i agree, if someone called me baby??????????

🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

that’s all i have to say. next question.

no everytime i write an almost kiss im literally on the edge of my seat as well like should i make them kiss or should i wait🤨🤨

REAL. we’re not officially w conrad yet but we bascially are married w two dogs and an adopted son (steven) so we don’t even need to go through the formalities anymore

no fr like ily conrad but now is not the time, you better get in that car and drive to the hospital.

YESS IT DOES MAKE SENSE IM SO GLAD YOU NOTICED!!!! i didn’t want to make this one too like fast paced or too like oh everyone gets what they want happily ever after like i feel like you don’t need to be constantly making out or talking w someone you care about, even just spending some time w them is more than enough like just having these tiny cute little moments is so lovely

YESS IM SO EXICTED TO WRITE MORE ON THIS ONE sadly i don’t think i can post another part until like friday night / the weekend bc schooo started again today (kms) and it’s gcse year (double kms) but im so happy you like it, i love love love these conment things so much you have no idea🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽

[is-the-primate-vid-cute]

what do you think about the ethics and practicality of making a concerted effort to domesticate a species of primate? does it vary from species to species? i'm personally not a fan of domesticating animals for no reason but Goldfish exist, so theres precedent, and i do at least think one could find more uses for a domesticate primate than a decorative fish

Domesticating primates just isn't feasible or ethical, and I'll explain why.

Domestication is a process that occurs over many years (up to hundreds of thousands), and it is a process that is different for every species of domesticated animal. We must understand that there are limits, even for successfully domesticated animals, in how they are able to be a part of out lives. A chicken is a domesticated animal, but you couldn't keep one as a pet in the same way as a cat or dog. Keeping a chicken as a pet requires a lot more of the outdoors, both for the chickens sake and for yours (they are not house trainable and will poop where they stand). Similarly, if you have pet rats they need their own cage/habitat and can't just free roam in your house. I bring these examples up to illustrate that the inherent needs of a species do not go away when they are domesticated.

Domestication requires somewhat of a symbiotic relationship: my dog provides me with love and companionship and I provide him with all his needs from food and shelter to enrichment. Further back in history dogs were hunting companions, so your dog would provide you help with hunting for the parts of the kill you wouldn't eat. Dogs are such a successful pet because our species have evolved together to have a mutually benefit relationship, and we have been able to selectively breed them to create different types of dog to best suit different lifestyles. You want a hunting buddy? A marathon companion? A cuddle bug? A protector? Theres a dog for that, and a good number of dogs that can fill many of these roles at once.

Primates do not work across the board when it comes to suitability for domestication. First of all, all primates have exceptionally complex needs. While there are some pet owners who like a challenge and will raise high maintanence pets, even small primates are not good contenders. Theres a reason why zoos have whole teams of people managing primate care! Primates have very diverse diets, complex social needs, are intelligent and require intellectual stimulation, and require tons of physical stimulation. These are all things which are very difficult and labour intensive for people to provide, but which primates are great at doing themselves in the wild.

You mentioned goldfish as an example, and I don't think I have to point out the difference between a fish and a monkey, but lets extend the comparison. Lets say you have a fish and you want to domesticate it to be able to live happily in your home- which shouldnt be hard because the fish in question will only be a foot long at the biggest. Now lets say that fish can eat commercially available fish food, but that can only be one part of its diet. You will also need to feed your fish a variety of fruits and vegetables. Not only that, but your fish is incredibly intelligent and requires physical and mental challenges to keep it happy. Because it is in your care, you need to give it puzzles and toys, and new ones frequently to keep it from becoming depressed. Now lets say this is a fish that is very social and needs to be around more of the same type of fish. Well that kind of makes it easier since they can entertain each other, but now you are looking at 10 of these fish. Now 10 fish that can grow to be a foot long each, how big of a tank do you need? Don't forget that it needs filters, stones, toys, and since they teach each other things you need even more puzzles for them to keep them intellectually stimulated. Even after decades of only breeding the lowest maintenence, most affectionate, and easygoing of the bunch, the offspring are not going to be substantially different. Now lets add that these fish can live 40+ years and don't reach sexual maturity until they're 10 yesrs old. This is essentially what we are looking at with hypothetical primate domesticstion.

In the past we have seen that even primates who come from multiple generations of captive breeding do not exhibit more domesticable traits. Additionally, humans have loved primates for thousands of years! We posted before about ancient egyptians keeping baboons, and frankly if primates could be successfully domesticated I believe firmly that it would have happened by now. To sum up:

1. Primates are too high maintanence to be worth domesticating, as their needs are incredibly complex.

2. There is no evidence from existing captive primate information that domestication is possible.

3. The fact that we have made it this far in history with so many domesticated animals but have yet to see any domesticated primates makes it all the more likely that domesticsted primates are not feasible.

4. There is no natural symbiosis between any primate species and humans that would facilitate domestication.

5. The best thing for any primate in captivity is a life that mimics their natural environment, and that includes inner species companionship.

[creweemmaeec11]

I’ve been thinking about getting a pet rat, do you have any tips or what to start researching??

Absolutely! Pet rats are fantastic!

Heres a bunch of general info!

They are easy to care for, super interactive and intelligent, they can be trained to do tricks, mine are shoulder trained, which means I put them on my shoulder and just leave them there while I walk around and do whatever else, and they just sit and watch and hang out and it's great (they have awesome balance) and they love it. They can even be litter trained.

What rat should you get?

The first thing to know, is you can never, ever, have only 1 rat.

You NEED to get at least 2.

They are very social animals, and they need a friend. I can not stress this enough. Under no circumstance should you be buying a single rat.

Having only a single rat, on top of being just generally cruel, leads to behavior problems, depression, aggression, anxiety and just a really bad time for both the rat and the owner. Most rat breeders will actually refuse to sell you single rat baby unless you already have rats and your looking on simply getting another one. Please do not buy a single rat.

The next thing to consider is whether you want males or females. There is actually a big difference between their behaviors, potential health problems, and even diets.

-Male rats tend to be more lazy, cuddly, and want to spend more time with you. However, they do smell more, as they scent mark. Males should never eat anything citrusy, (lemons, oranges, ect) as studies show it increases chances of tumors.

-Females tend to be more energetic and playful and just want to go,go,go. They don't want to be held as much, and good luck getting them to stay still long enough to cuddle. They smell less, though. They can have bits of citrus, but most reccomend to just steer clear of it regardless. Females are also prone to mammory tumors (how I lost hex) unless spade at a young age.

Some health tips for both genders:

-They can eat pretty much anything, I often call mine "glorified greenbins". They love supper leftovers, scraps, ect. One of their favour treats is the bones from cooked chicken(good for grinding down teeth too)

-in general, avoid things with too much protein and try to keep it low in their diet (so dont give them too much meat) protein has been linked to hair loss, tumors, and other health problems

-stay away from peanutbutter or other sticky foods unless its watered down. Rats don't have a gag reflex, and thus can't dislodge something if they choke. Many risk it, but it's not worth the risk in my opinion.

If you have a cat or dog, make sure their cage is in a place your other pets cant pester and scare them.

Their cage

Just some quick tips and info:

While rats don't need a big cage, the tiny hamster cage the guy at the pet store will try and sell you won't cut it, esspecially once they are full grown. I personally recommend Critter Nation cages (as most people do, they are the community standard) but they are expensive new. Search facebook marketplace or other sites for second hand cages, they are a great way to get a good cage cheap.

Rats will chew through any cage that isnt metal, they can't be kept in plastic bottomed cages either.

Rats need airflow. Most rat owners of the western world strongly disagree with keeping rats in tanks.

It's important your rats have at least one place to hide, somewhere out of site they can go if they feel stressed or scared.

Toys! Rats are very intelligent, and need stimulation! They arent picky though. While you can buy fancy toys, they also don't mind diy (theres plenty) or even just some cardboard boxes, pompoms, cardboard tubes, fabric scraps like old destroyed clothing cut up, socks, ect! (I could make a whole nother post on great rat toy ideas alone)

Rats are great climber and jumpers, something to keep in mind while arranging their cage

I'm ready to get my rats, where do I get them?

I'd personally urge you to avoid big pet store chains, as those rats are typically mass bred with little care. Leople have bought females that turned out to be pregnant, rats that had mites, ect. Search online to find local rat breeders. These rats are bred to be healthy, handled daily as babies, ect. They will be more expensive, but will have less health and behavioral problems and will typically live longer (trust me, I learned the hard way)

Other things to keep in mind and be aware of:

people don't like rats. Especially elders. I've heard it all, many claim you'll catch diseases from them (despite the fact theyve lived in their cage their whole live and have been bred to be pets. Where would they have caught the disease to give to me in the first place? Its idiotic and completly false) I've had family members comment rude things of their photos, "I'd scream if there was a rat on my shoulder" ect. (If you rent, you may have problems with other tenants or the property owner, worried about them "getting loose in the walls" or some sh*t)Don't let idiots sway you. Rats are wonderful, very clean and intelligent animals. Just be prepared to defend your babies, and teach/show people to give them the respect they deserve.

rats don't have a long life span, and while some can live to be around 5, most only live about 2 years. Just understand this.

Know you will make mistakes, and that's okay. Every single pet owner has and will make mistakes. You will learn.

Anyway, that about sums up my little spiel, but here are the basic topics to research when thinking about getting rats:

How to care for pet rats

Rat diet and limitations

Things to know about pet rats

There are many, many good resources online! I also reccomend joining some rat facebook groups. The people in them are super nice and informative to questions, and its wonderful having a community behind you, and have somewhere to go with any questions!

I hope this helped! If your thinking about getting rats as pets, I encourage you to! Just do your research. They make wonderful pets and companions.

Also know that I'm not an expert, or a vet, I'm still learning everyday. This is just what I've learned via owning them. I urge you to do your own research into some of the things I mentioned here.

[taoistyuri]

once again my dreams r insane

so like, i was in this world. it was literally black velvetopia from psychonauts. black, colorful, bright, a lot of buildings, it literally was. and people we sorta just lived there a bit? idk i remember looking for one of the bathrooms and it was sort of down in a abandoned area. (unknown event) then i come back and am going through the city again. i come across this tunnel that leads to the rest of the world

inside its like, a store? theres a bunch of toys and stuff on display. *sighs deeply* there was a pinkie pie figure in a box with a shocked expression and the title on the box sort of like a word bubble was “communism” im not joking. so anyways i go into the bathroom there and its fuckin weird.

like idk i dont think there were stalls but i guess that was “normal” and there was sort of a line and this lady was with her baby i ..think????? i dont know some form of events lead to this white boy fixing up osmething in the bathroom too and singing his own song specifically he said the n word and i was like “what the fuck did you just say” and he did that horrible little smug smile and then i cant remember if i attacked him or walked out but either way i went back to black velvetopia

(people in the store world seemed to not like black velvetopia because it hurt their eyes)

so i find NAOTHER bathroom but this one is different than this abandoned one before. inside its horrible, it sort of looks like a carpeted basement though. theres several rats running around and even a cat or two chasing them. (i collect a rat figment and am like really now -_-)

sometime during this, a huuge slime guy takes over the city and is its ruler. i dont really remember what was happening but it was sort of like a boss fight but this huge huge slime guy had a ton of hp and someone else was fighitng him(..c..coach oleander? kochamara?) uhh then it was sorta done with that dream. pokemon related now. something talking about the next games? i was like “sinnoh is kind of hard to choose, ive had piplup and chimchar so i shold pick turtwig, but chimchar is such a cute monke and gen4 doesnt have a lot fo fire types” and this other person was like “what are you talking about? these are new starters” then well, it was new starters. i dont remember them. there was one that was sort of spiky like a durian and was somewhat lion shaped i think. little fella.

then it was like!? run away/catch/run thing with a whole pack of luxray. i dont know. also in my head i was debating what normal type i should have on my team between purugly staravia or ambipom.  yeah i really dont know what was going on here. love

[calocera]

SPOILERS FOR CATS 2019, here’s my hot takes and opinions

be warned, THIS IS LOOOONG

First off my overall opinion, i LITERALLY cannot say whether it was good or bad, like lots of critics say it just...is beyond that. It’s VERY fun and that’s all I can bring myself to say, I have LOTS of problems with it but I can’t even say that they make the movie bad. It is definitely worth watching

OPINIONS ON CHARACTERS:

Victoria: she’s good! I appreciate that they kinda left her personality blank other than her innocence since that’s pretty much how she always was, still not super thrilled with her as a main character but franchesca did the best she could

Munkustrap: I loved him! he was more of a main character than I would have expected, but they STILL cut all the charm from his lines... why do I love him then? Robbie fairchild did AMAZING background acting, whenever he was in frame he was always doing something SUPER munkustrap-y and making cute dad faces. he was dealt bad lines but he worked around it best he could. Also his legs were normal so...epic fail

Mistoffelees: 😒😒😒😒😒🤢🤢🤮 disappointed but not at all surprised...he was just a Woobie, a softboy uwu nice guy. I felt like I was seeing fanon 2013 loki in cat form. THEY MADE HIS SONG A SADBOY PITY PARTY SONG...WHY WOULD YOU MAKE THE 11 O’CLOCK NUMBER SLOW AND SAD???? Where is the smug little shit who’s vague and aloof yet confident and joyous? He was murdered by his evil homophobic shadow clone. I’m not even gunna indulge the fact that him and Victoria were a thing, I’ll go over that later. He also just constantly looked like the crying cat meme his eyes were so red and watery it was horrifying, yet somehow he wasn’t the worst character , that leads us too.....

tugger: what.the.fuck.did.you.do.to.this.boy. HE GOT THE TREATMENT I EXPECTED FOR MUNKUSTRAP! HE WAS DEMOTED TO BACKGROUND CHARACTER! not only did he not sing mr. mistoffelees, he literally did nothing other than his song, he never interacted with ANY characters besides jenny in 1 scene. I know cats has no set main characters but he’s undoubtedly one of the most important characters and he’s like...the least important named character in the movie. ALSO Jason Derulo was not sexy at all. There was NO hip thrusting NO sexy meowing NO glamrock, he was just an asshole and if I hadn’t already seen the original I would have either completely forgotten about his character or though he was the worst character. I’m so fucking angy I cannot express.

Girzzabella: ngl I expected better. Her acting was great but with the horrible effects I couldnt get invested but I’ll touch on the effects later. Her singing was good, but I expected it to carry the movie and it wasn’t at all the best song in the movie, I’d say she’s about as good as I expected she’d be but the movie itself was more enjoyable than I expected so she was less significant

Old d: she was fine, she LOOKED the part definitely, she didn’t have as large a presence as ken page but I wouldnt expect that of her. Her singing wasn’t the greatest though, her voice is fine by it’s just NOT suited to old d’s songs. I would have preferred she play a female gus bc her voice is very sweet and frail, not at all built for belting like her songs required.

Macavity: he’s just...eh. He’s basically a comic relief villain which sucks. He does practically nothing besides kidnap people, say a cheesy line, and act like a caricature of a 90s cartoon villain (and not one of the fun ones) like theres a scene where he poofs away and when he does it he goes, MACAvityyyyyyy and fades away its so unintentionally funny but it just makes him so lame as a villain. not to mention he doesnt even die at the end or get any satisfying conclusion he just gets stuck on top of a statue and his powers suddenly stop working (for some reason??)

Bombalurina: fuck that, I am simultaneously glad she only was in the macavity number bc fuck off Taylor Swift but also disappointed bc she deserved so much better.

Bustopher: 😟 never in my darkest nightmares did I think I’d see bustopher Jones deepthroat multiple crayfish but here we are. Somehow THIS was the most sexual song, I cannot begin to name the fetishes checked off by this performance bc itd hit word limit. Let me just say that I said multiple times out loud, “damn bustopher kinda a freak with it 😏😏” like I CANNOT stress how weirdly sexual it gets. And ofc its all otherwise just haha funney fat guy eat food and burp and fall down. He also breaks the fourth wall a few times which like, fuck you

Jenny: exactly what was shown in the trailer. Unfunny fat jokes and slapstick humor. Also they focused WAY too many shots on her cat pussy and I wish I was making that up. Also of note is that the cgi on the rats and cockroaches are drastically worse than the rest of the movie, like not just bad designs the effects are BAD. also they translated they whole gumbie cat fur-shedding as her wearing fake skin over her outfit which would be fine but UHH the fake fur is skin tight??? so it literally looks like shes ripping off her skin and she does it multiple times its fucking terrifying

Mungojerrie and rumpelteazer: meh, they are fine as characters, not quite as energetic as I would have liked but they didn’t massively fuck anything up? The song was horrible, they went against the beat for...some reason? Like it’s a song with a very distinct rhythm and they split up the lyrics so weirdly. I liked that they followed through with the lore of them working for macavity

Skimbleshanks: YES YESSSSSSSSSS HOLY FUCKING SHIT 💗💕💖💞💜😳😳😳😳😳😳😳💜💛🧡💚💖❤️💗 i absolutely CANNOT express how good skimbleshanks made me feel. He looks like a leather daddy with his chains and suspenders and hat and stache, I hate that I’m saying this but uh...mr skimbleshanks sir😳 we were actually screaming it was so fucking good. Watching this movie was worth it just for skimble. Unironically. I’m listening to the song as we speak. It was kinda weird that they moved the tap dancing to this song but that’s more of a detractor from Jennie’s and a plus side to skimbles since it’s good tap

Gus: good! Ian did a good job of course, no one doubted that he would.

Growltiger and griddlebone: not racist but still absolutely horrifying. One of the worst parts of the movie, I actually got squeamish looking at griddlebone a few times that’s how bad she looks

Everyone else: not that good. I couldn’t tell who was who, all their personalities were annoying, I’m on imdb as we speak trying to figure out who even was supposed to be who. Demeter is completely butchered and jemima just isn’t there, doesn’t sing her part, it all sucked man.

Tech talk:

CGI: okay so here’s the thing, the effects are good. GREAT even, the issue is how fucking horrible the designs are. The lack of cat nose, mouth, and hairy cheeks makes them all look disgusting. Also the feet. Holy fuck why do they have feet. THERES A FUCKING SCENE WHERE TUGGER GRABS VICTORIAS FOOT AND SNIFFS IT. IT LASTS LIKE 5 SECONDS. Old Deuteronomy, Gus, and Cassandra (bc she was already bald) are the only characters I’d say look anywhere close to decent, grizabella looks okay in profile but head on it’s all horrible again. its really such a shame bc the sets are gorgeous! i really hope this movie gets some form of recognition for its sets.

the editing and directing was DOGSHITTTTTTT there are SO many scenes where characters just teleport or parts where people are singing and no ones mouths are moving its really distracting

Other things:

it’s OBVIOUS that the critics calling this movie horny have never seen the original. I’d definitely say the movie is LESS HORNY than the play. It IS however waaaaaaay more uncomfortable with its hornieness, so I’d say in that regard YES, the horny stuff is much more gratuitous and off putting despite there being an overall smaller amount than the play. ie everything bustopher jones does

They changed a BUNCH of lyrics for some reason?? Like they cut verses which I understand but there are like a handful of lyrics in almost every song they just...change. like...okay? All changing lyrics is gunna do is make people who knew the songs frustrated when they can’t sing along

the dancing was incredible! shame the cg just fucking invalidates all of it bc your mind doesnt register it as real people doing real moves

OKAY THE FUCKING CATNIP SCENE so when taylor swift showers everyone in catnip they all just fucking start moaning and go FULL HORNY its TOO MUCH like misto full on does an o face like eyes rolled back mouth open  and munkustrap is like ass up panting i still havent processed it im fucking terrified to encounter it again. they cut the orgy? yet added THIS??? k

WHY did they take 2 of the most iconic characters who FREQUENTLY interact and just

a. Never even have them make eye contact

b. Make 1 a background character

c. Completely change the personality of the other one

On the topic of Victoria/misto: I am just still at a loss as to why they thought it’d be a good idea? They completely removed Plato and for what? This? Pathetic. It’s worth noting the weirdly munkustrap has WAYYY more chemistry with both Victoria AND mistoffelees then they did with each other (there’s a part where it looks like misto and munk are about to kiss for some reason?? munk ALSO gets all touchy feely with skimbleshanks???) anyways munkustrap king moments

tldr; its worth watching, the best parts were the sets, the dancing, skimbleshanks, and munkustrp fucking CARRIES the weight of the world with his face acting. the worst things were a big fat tie between bustopher, tugger,misto,jenny,growltiger and griddlebone, and the godawful design choices

[midasgutz]

elfen lied manga was such a fuckin trip. did i dream that shit up ? who allowed the dude who made that to just write all that shit??

i need to talk about elfen lied because this shit has been living rent free in my head for over an actual decade. significantly longer than a decade.

im glad that i can now accept that media i consume doesnt necessarily say anything about me, because. jesus, every inch of elfen lied is a war crime. every panel.

the coolest character who was generic tough military dude, who right when you meet him makes a point of punching a secretary just for standing behind him. and then goes out to find and kill a 17 year old with abandonment issues. and gets his shit kicked in and his arm ripped off and his eyes plucked out. and so, naturally, he trades his testicles for some dope robot eyes. for the sake of all humanity. oh and a really mediocre robot arm that he can actually break if he puts too much force into like anything. and so naturally he then finds a 14 year old homeless girl, who helped him while he was bleeding out on the beach. and of course he beats her up and, possibly kicks her dog. and then he gives her his number. uh, so he can come help her if anyone tries to... beat her up? because he cant owe her anything. and then she says something he doesnt like so he beats her up again and she shows him the paper he wrote his number on and says "someone scary is screwing with me". he storms off after that but doesnt take the paper, he still owes her. he makes good on it too, she gets in some bad trouble with a bad bad dude later. a bad bad dude with a trenchcoat whos basically just a vampire hunter, crossbow included but actually he's here to hunt teenage girls with horns, not fangs. the crossbow shoots hard metal balls with velcro spikes that have a toxin on them that causes excrutiating pain. this guys a bad bad dude, and he miiiiiight be suggesting he's gonna rape this 14 year old girl but it could be the unfairthful translation causing confusion. probably not tho the author of this series is majorly fucked in the head. anyway robocop shows up and he puts his boot right down this dudes throat so thats like whatever. that panel was my desktop wallpaper for like 6 years. we find out that 17 year old girl is evil because some kids killed her dog with a vase. so she blew them up, and after that she goes around blowing people up just to eat the food in their fridge and hang around the crib for a minute. so shes framed as the good guy and robocop is evil this time and they fight again and she does kill robocop this time which sucks because theres a good portion of manga left and no one else is as interesting as he is. he dies on the beach where he lost his eyes and his arm and lets be honest he basically lost his balls at the same time.

oh. and theres a girl who does peepee in her diaper a lot. and she can sing. i dont know why she was there but i mean every other fetish the author had already made a fucking appearance so why not lmao

theres also like. some main characters. theyre complete shit. these include a normal boy. his cousin who is the most annoying character in the fucking world. she is literally just "im only here to pad the amount of love interests our generic main character can have all at once" the character. yeah man, his cousin? cause shit why not. why not, its japan, do as the romans do. also theres the alternate personality of the 17 year old. shes only here so that evil 17 year old girl can be a love interest not once but twice, and i mean, conveniently shes often naked. makes sense, when the only word you can say is "milk".

and then there's Nana. Nana is a quad amputee after evil 17 year old girl ripped all her limbs off and almost finished her off. but dont worry! her dad, whos not her dad at all, finds her and he gives her some prosthetics that she can control with her super powers. what do you mean you werent aware of the super powers? of course they have super powers. its manga. after he does this he just lets her loose with a bunch of money and his tie because she asked very politely for the dangly thing he wears on his neck. she wears it like a headband, even though she established she knew it went around his neck. so yeah he gave her money but she was raised in a lab like a rat so she has no clue what its for. she meets the 14 year old homeless girl and they have a fun time being homeless together. Nana burns the money in a fire to keep warm but only some of it because the 14 year old girl tells her that you can trade money for food, which makes nana very happy because boy did she want some of the 99 cent street vendor food earlier. no one acknowledges that nana has enough money to buy her own house and be well off for easily 5 years. 14 year old girl takes her to the main character house that shes been staying at for a while and they have a bath. nana hated this idea until she realized that bath doesnt mean bucket of cold water at her new sort of house. but uh oh, nana senses evil 17 year old and shes kinda pissed about her arms and legs. they almost do a fight but wait whats this? 17 year old isnt fighting back, she just keeps saying "milk" and smiling. nana takes some issue with this and promptly leaves after pushing her through a rice paper door. shortly after everyone goes looking for nana.

um some stuff happens and then whaaaattt??? nanas not dads real daughter is introduced. shes locked in a circular room lined with lead and chloride of lime. with a diameter of 15 meters, the length of her invisible hands. shes only ever had the voice of a single woman to comfort her, shes permanently lockdd in bondage gear unable to move. she has to use a wheelchair to move because her legs have completely atrophied. she moves it with her invisible hands, her real ones are useless. she calls the only voice she knows her mother. her mothers job has been to talk to and comfort this dangerous girl for years. said mother mentions her excitement to finally see the girl in person, and also casually drops how theyve sewn bombs into several parts of her body. conveniently, if shes in intense pain her powers dont work. so she meets her mom, takes one look at her and says "youre not my mom >:(" and sends her entire upper torso flying. conveniently said torso lands near the bomb controls. she slams that shit like shes a rat with an orgasm button and babygirls arm go bye bye. they inform her while she writhes in pain that she has to comply with their demands or they can blow her whole deal up next time. shes pretty ok with being blown up, but then they tell her they want her to kill something so her ears perk up like a cat hearing a can opener. yep shes going to go kill evil 17 year old. nanas not dad is not taking any of this well but he essentially gets mindbroken after he has to blow up his daughter later after shit flies off the handle. he spends his time as a homeless man, denoted by the sudden appeaeance of a large beard, living in a shack on the beach where robocop died. he does note the beach is incredibly clean and that is because robocop picked up allllllll the trash so that evil 17 year old couldnt throw it at him. he did totally eat shit anyway though no worries. im not bitter about it why should you be? im not.

anyway shit happens and 17 year old melts into a really graphic puddle of fleshy goo, and in doing so totally does the jesus thing. because at some point she realized she really just wanted to be with main character, but all of the things shes done makes that impossible.

i was like maybe 12 when i read this shit. i didnt reread it for this. im pretty sure most of this is accurate but i CAN and WILL promise you one thing. diaper girl is real, and he REALLY really really really 100% did trade his balls for robot eyes, and a playdough robot arm.

[lankyledlights]

u should talk about ur ocs bro 😳 (but only if u wanna but agsndg i am intrigued)

okay so i have. A Lot more than what ive posted theres literally so many and i used to draw them So much my freshman year and now i just. Stopped for now reason at all anyways the whole plot(?) Kinda for (for like my main ocs at least there are a couple that are in a completely different universe)

So the main plot. Uh

There are a select group of individuals (only approximately 50 in the world) that have this special blood type called the golden blood type. This is an actual thing im pretty sure, i did research on it awhile ago so i dont remember a lot but! Its a thing

And theres this giant plague that sweeps the earth and basically any human (im saying human bc idk if animals have red blood types but the animals arent affected) with the basic red blood types are affected and their immune systems cant handle it so they all die (now that im typing this out this sounds depressing) and the 'gold' blood types are completely unaffected. This plague has been speculated happening by the government for years but theyve kept it secret because why would u tell the whole world its gonna die thats kinda messed

This whole time theyve been keeping most of these people with gold blood close together, or within the same area so when this giant emergency happens, they wont just be completely on their own, and theyll have others to be with.

one of my ocs, florence, her parents secretly are working for the government and she doesnt find out until she finds a letter explaining the situation late into the plague

so its just her and a bunch of other kids trying to live together

also florence has an epic haircut 😎

theres also:

Byrd, shes just tired of everything and everyone. She is grumpy but florence makes her happy

u know the post thats like: the grumpy one is soft for the sunshine one,,,,,, thats byrd n florence

theres josh!! Hes like this funky inventor mechanic dude originally from florida. This information is not very important but it also is bc he is bonkers

Theres timothy, who is josh's brother but joah calls him timba because one day he got a bucket stuck on his head and its been there ever since (timba is bucket in tagalog) now everyone calls him timba. Hes goofy and also the young one

Theres antony, or ant who tries his hardest to be the Mysterious guy with a tragic past but hes actually just a dork

Daphne is his sister!! Shes the oldest of the group but shes probably the least mature

Theres Bee! Shes epic lesbiam with cool hello kitty earrings, she is also a funky inventor mechanic and has an endless collection of denim jackets

i almost forgot ben. Haha whoops . Ben is a dumbb hoe hes the little devil on ur shoulder he gets into trouble and he is stinky. Also one of his fingers got bit off by a giant mf rat . Very important

Florence! I havent described whats shes like yet. Shes the optimist sunshine one! She has bugs in her pockets and childrens books from the 1940s in her backpack,, she has a cat whisker collection . Also she gardens and loves byrd. Her and timba are the youngest, and are best friends

She maintains all the plants and greenery in the town area

They all inhabited a giant ghost suburban town and decorated each of the houses to suit their own personalities ! Except timba sometimes he just sleeps at the beach

so basically this whole thing is about the misadventures of kids in a post apocalyptic plague environment in the 70s

Theres like. 2 adults that manage try to manage all these kids (daphne and ant)

Thats all i think (thats actually not all thats just all that i can think of at this very moment)

[lgalacticjayl]

Cats the movie (2019) review

So as many others who watched this movie have done its my turn to tell yall my thoughts after just watching it in theaters.

First off : like no theters are showing it anymore its only playing a 45 min drive away amd only at 9 20 pm so i just spent a lot of time driving and got home at 1. (Because my friend lives even farther away) and thats all in like my northern province area just one show a day.

Second there was my group of 3 another group of 3-4 a couple i think and this random lady by herself. This lady shushed us the whole movie even before the actual movie started and we were laughing at just the sheer concept of it she shushed us and another group and told us to be quite. Even just for laughing. This woman wanted to see and enjoy this movie.

The graphic are just not good. Cats ears clip through cats, their feet don't look like they are touching the ground, the fur texture of clothes is the same as the cats fur and thats unsettling. Some clothes hung above the body and didn't move with the body. Some cats had shoes. WHY? Who made them shoes? Where do they get these clothes from and why can one of them tapdance?

The physics don't make sense. The cats are way to small to be actual cat size and it upsets me. A ring can be worn as a braclet but try that on your cat at home i dare you. But also they had cat sized rings for some cats. Some cats also had gold teeth and i dont like that. Like they were just too small and looked like smurfs rather than cats which also made the mice and cockroaches even smaller. The rats looled to be the size of and inch or two. Some times a cat would hold a dice in his hand, cats also cant grab things, and it was the size of the whole hand but so where his cards and that doesn't even make sense. Did he have cat sized playing cards? Also the movement sometimes like jumping and flying through the air was very un cat like and was way slower than cats fall/move. Cats also shouldn't and dont drink milk so. Their tails also are for balance not decoration. The only good thing is their ears actually showing their emotion.

That brings us to the cats themselves. JUST NO!! WHY? They are just humans with fur and its unsettling! Like its just plastering a face onto a kind of cat head like from what we do in the shadows and then human bodies with a fursuit/morphsuit on. They didnt even change the noses or anything. They still have eyebrows and human eyes. Why do they look so naked!? Especially the McAfee dude or whatever. He has abs! And the females have breasts! Cats have 6 nipples and that would be even worse. Cats dont work like that! At least they are neutered or this would be truly horrifying. Why have hands for paws. Cats have paws. Cats can't grab things. Cats dont have feet. They keep mentioning paws and none of them have paws. Also calico cats can't be males so that one twin cat is trans confirmed.

The plot:

I DON'T KNOW!

Every song sounded like a different langue with random words thrown in lile lamp or whatever and Whats A Jelico Cat? Apparently its like a clan? We had to look it up because it doesnt explain it! There is a song about names and im still confused they never bring it up again in the rest of the movie. That grey cats only role was just showing the new cat around. Honestly there was no plot it was just showing a new cat around and then so.eone got in an airballon. Wierd thing i still don't understand WHY DO THEY CATS HAVE MAGIC !!! But Like Only Some! WHAT? ? Why? Why can that dude teleport other cats? Why does the magician cat have to be like the only good cat? He also has magic i guess and can hold a pencil that is the same heighg as his cards. I also love his jacket and kinda want to make it. Very glad there was no kiss scene but they came very close to having a couple and that was not okay. There was also not a cgi dog thankfully. I did actually like the twins energy and song and drugging of cats. The train cat dude was also cool but much too small for the rails. Not realistic. Gus whose name is ASPARAGUS! for some reason is a theater cat? Idk but i kinda like him he just doing his own thing. The taylor swift song is like the best song but mcafee is uncomfortable to watch still. And theres like an abbandoned cat that gets picked to start a new life by the elder cat and she flies away in an airballon that appears and she disappears into a cat shaped cloud. Before all this sorry um rebel wilson unzips a layer of cat fur to reveal clothes its just unsettling. This happens multiple times. There is a cat that follows warriorcat naming conventions. Magical cat is named after the devil and is the best character. Why did jason derulo have to do this to us.I actually knew the song memories some how before hand. Evil cat lost his powers at some point. The movie ends with the old lady cat looking straight at the camera theough your soul which triggers an innate fight or flight reflex and that gaze is held for wayyyy too long. Never did explain the magic aspect and i know nothing of these cats backstories so much is lost on me. There is also a bunch or random talk about ghost and and afterlife? I think and im pretty confused.

There are some actually funny writen moments and a lot of cat puns. The script itslef isnt bad its pretty standard not like award winning but its good. If it weren't for the whole look of the movie it would be pretty good. If it were properly animated like aristocats it would be a solid movie. That was my rant about cats the movie. Sorry it doesnt make sense the movie was very confusing. I am jusg writing down all the thoughts from my brain.

Overal good time with friends, bad experience with actual movie.

[aleja-liveblog]

A LOT LOT LOT OF REALLY LATE ASKS

While I’m here, @lilietsblog send me a bunch of asks a while ago (back in october) that first I forgot about and then I felt awkward since it was months ago. But since I’m still here, I’ll push through the awkwardness i’ve been avoiding since December 

Note they send a bunch, some numbered but apparently the second one is missing. @lilietsblog i dont expect you to remenber after months but if you do...

Also this is so fucking long that im putting a keep reading 

About Catherine and Rat Company (1): these are war games monitored by adults. They are intended to be training, and even though winning/losing also matters, I imagine major breaches of discipline (ie straight up disobeying the person supposed to be your commanding officer, which was Catherine with Nauk incapacitated) would be remarked and punished anyway. In the army it's more important to obey than to be clever or the whole thing can't work.”

No comment since I know nothing about armies but i’ll take your word for it 

(3) You keep suspecting Name shenanigans, but you think if Catherine was a side character and someone else became lieutenant and then led them to actual successes against First Company they wouldn't be cheering that person on and swearing eternal loyalty (until evening anyway)? It's just how people work. Charismatic leaders are a real world thing, not just a story thing. Story can enhance what's already there, but Speaking has been explicitly called out so far. Catherine isn't doing that.”

Really good point. Also consider this, I will suspect Name shenanigans until the day I die. The story will end, I will be in my deathbed, and I will tell my grieving family that it was Name shenanigans in apgte

“(4) The subtler effects of Name shenanigans are mostly in coincidences and luck. What COINCIDENCE it is that Cat was placed in the loser company willing to rally behind ANYONE who gave them even a modicum of success. What COINCIDENCE it is that they went up against First Company, making Cat look even more impressive in context. And, uh, the fact Cat got lieutenant's position is explicitly no coincidence, just Black's fiat. That's being apprentice to the head of the army for you.”

See above for my take on this (also I truly hope in my deepest of hearts that you know its deep Name manipulation because you already read this and am trying to throw me off. Because I would love a story about confronting Tropeworld, please give me this) 

“(5) To bring characterterization together a little bit: remember how Sergeant Ebele in Rat's Nest liked Cat and encouraged her? Remember how Cat fast-talked her way into a rebel group? Remember how she called herself out for being too much of a brave idiot when she went to save that girl in chapter 1? She's just in the exact position to show off and capitalize on these traits that were there from before Black got involved.”

Really good Catherine analyzing and I agree. After all theres a reason Black picked her. BUT it can be Cat being charming and leadering material, AND name stuff. I dont trust the Names and Roles at all. 

“(6) These are TEENAGERS in a WAR GAME. LEEEEEROY JEEEEEEEEENKINSSS!!!!!.... tl;dr it would take a mind-controlling Name to get these children to act DIFFERENTLY in this situation lmao”

Oh yes, holy crap this is just lord of the flies. However,I’m still side eyeing everything

 “ God this will give birth to so many more rumors. Who laughs in the middle of fighting?" this is called adrenaline and I'm not saying ANYONE would but it's at the very least a real thing lmao (if you're of Catherine's temperament~)”

Are you sure? Absolutely sure?  I didn’t want to know that and I’m pretty sure there will still be rumors even if that only makes a small percentage of the ones that will pop up (hell we just seen the Blackguards take Cat in front of her classmates, god the rumors everywhere)

(I am not saying whether there are or not Name shenanigans involved, why that would be spoilers. Just pointing out that it comes together as is, either way)

Name shenanigans  Name shenanigans  Name shenanigans

(the psychological parts come together, anyway. No comment on jumping over rolling logs)

oh yeah we’ve already seen its pretty impossible and it tipped of Hellhound 

...

and a comment from when I returned last month

WELCOME BACK WE MISSED YOU 

I was gonna keep this one to myself but I’m already commented of everything else from lili so why not. thank you :)

[apebrain-apera]

HH: WOLF Pentalogy P1

**There are tl;dr sections explaining things after each major part image in case this is too long for you**

Ok so most Tyler, The Creator fans should already know about the entire WOLF trilogy conspiracy, basically a theory about how Tyler’s first three albums Bastard, Goblin and Wolf, released in that order, all fit into a larger narrative that’s could be quite possibly one of the largest multi-faceted music story line I’ve ever witnessed. Now that we got the fanboying out of the way, this will mainly focus on two parts - the original WOLF trilogy, and secondly where his latest two projects fit into them.

PART 1 : THE ORIGINAL TRILOGY

Now although the albums come in their own chronological order it would be BASTARD > GOBLIN > WOLF. But of course it isn’t that easy so we’re gonna have to rearrange them to fit the narrative better. So our new order is WOLF > BASTARD > GOBLIN.

Wolf

So Wolf begins with the song Wolf. ikr? Anyhow so basically in this track Tyler meets Sam, who’s basically been at camp Flog Gnaw for a good bit of time. We know that Tyler’s been sent to camp because of the songs Answer and Lone, which talk about Tyler not being able to contact his dad and losing his grandmother respectively. We see similar situations with the therapy sessions of Bastard and the asylum sessions in Goblin. Back to the story Sam obviously does not want to make new friend with Tyler and basically tells him to leave him alone. So here comes the whole love triangle going on with Sam, Tyler and Sam’s girlfriend - Salem. Basically in the song Awkward Sam and Salem recount how their love bloomed while Slater talks about literally nothing other than Salem riding on the handlebars of Sam’s bike. That is literally all there is to this song. Meanwhile Tyler is struggling with the whole dad not being there situation we discussed earlier and also a song,Colossus, that does better and explaining the original definition of stanning better than the man who made the term in the first place. So during the whole partyisntover three part track thingy Tyler starts hitting on Salem and starts sneak dissing Sam to her on the Bimmer portion of the song, which is when Sam goes on a drug run. Oh yeah i forgot to mention that SAM SELLS DRUGS, but it’s pretty hard to miss when theres an entire song, 48, about how he sells it. Sam comes back and is obviously livid when some random guy voiced by Lionel tells him that Tyler and Salem are at the lake, a lake that is referenced TWICE with the songs Analog(Goblin) and Analog 2(OF VOL.2). So the description of IFHY says that Tyler performs Sam’s song, and Sam performs Tyler’s song. This references how the song is directed towards the new relationship between Salem and Tyler, while Yonkers(Goblin) sings about shoving things in, what we can assume to be Sam’s, girl. We find out in IFHY as well that Sam is at camp because of some seriously messed up things at home, which is basically Sam going crazy and killing a bunch of people on Pigs. On Rusty, Tyler calls on Earl and Domo to roll up on Sam’s squad, and the climax of that is Trashwang, when both squads go to war. So that’s basically all of Wolf, now its time for Bastard YAY!

tl;dr    - Basically Tyler and Sam had some heavy beef and Tyler has daddy issues and his grandma died. Sam is all edgy and killed a bunch of people. Also Tyler stole Sam’s girl and threatened to kill Sam if he saw him again and gets placed in therapy after getting caught beating his meat by Clancy. Not because he threatened to kill someone. BUT BECAUSE HE GOT CAUGHT JERKIN IT.

Bastard

Ok kids now its time for more text! Aren’t we all excited? Ok so Bastard starts when Tyler is basically sent to therapy for all that weird death threat stuff and basically starts his therapy with Dr. TC which looks a lot like Tyler Creator. But maybe it’s a coincidence. So Tyler talks about this girl who he calls “Sarah” even though he explicitly says it’s not her real name. Sarah = Salem is probably the most creative thing this character could come up with. There’s even a song called Sarah where Tyler talks about how he can never get over her and that she “tried to play him like a dummy”. So of course when Tyler talks about being abandoned and played he’s gonna talk about his dad leaving him on Seven (which might i add slaps like a motherfucker). Next is Pigs Fly where a guy talks about how he sells dope, had a sociopathic episode and fighting his own mental demons. Sounds a lot like our friendly neighborhood Sam doesn’t it? Even the name references his little episode. Anyway most of the other stuff doesn’t add very much to this narrative but the end sets up another deep dive into therapy for Tyler, as he gets so upset about his father situation that he threatens to shoot him if he ever meets him too. Well if you made death threats after the happy happy camp AND after therapy there’s only one place you can go right? OH OF COURSE! A MENTAL ASYLUM! DUH! WHY DIDN’T I THINK OF THAT?

tl;dr  -  Tyler goes to therapy for threatening to kill Sam, talks about how much he hates Salem now apparently which leads to more father abandonment issues. Sam looks remorseful for the whole murdering thing and Tyler gets even more edgy when he says he’ll kill his dad too.  

Goblin

So we finally made it to the final part of the trilogy, Nilbog. Its just goblin spelled backwards but apparently its an easter egg in the whole OF TAPE music videos. So at the end of Bastard Dr. TC tells Tyler that he would never kill anyone. Which obviously leads to the albums title track where Tyler literally goes on a 6 minute rant about how everybody should just fuck off. Just a little angel ain’t he? On the track Her(another slapper) Tyler starts referencing Awkward, which seems a little weird since its a song from Sam’s perspective. He talks about a girl who’s name is still his password, which somehow means that there’s a possibility that Sam is one of Tyler’s multiple alter ego’s, like Ace or Tron Cat. Sandwitches where Sam is out here straight throwing shots at Tyler’s squad. Analog as we’ve mentioned before talks about when Tyler and Salem were at the lake. Summer never has to end with Tyler, but it of course does because he doesn’t control time like a four dimensional being(nice callback to previous HH) and Salem is stolen back by Tyler’s alter ego Sam. This man is literally getting his girl stolen by himself. On BSD Tyler, Jasper and Taco, just do the whole ignorant hood rat shit and of COURSE that shit SLAPS. Then he kills both of them. On Windows, TC decides to get Tyler’s friends together for an intervention, but for some reason Jasper and Taco are missing. Tyler then proceeds to kill everyone except TC and Earl, who wasn’t there because of the whole Samoa incident(which is a nice job of tying it to reality). Goblin ends with tyler trying to escape the asylum, but TC stops him by revealing that he is also one of Tyler’s personalities. to quote  “See Tyler, I’m your conscience. I’m Tron Cat, I’m Ace, I’m Wolf Haley, I’m... (Me).” So this just means that our boy Tyler is bat shit crazy.

tl;dr  Tyler literally loses his mind, and so does Sam since he’s just an alter ego. Tron Cat and Ace start to take over Tyler’s mind which turns into him killing all his friends bar Earl. So now Tyler wants to find a way to stop this madness, a way to...... KTA(man im killing it with these puns). So what’s the best way to get rid of em? Make sure that Sam is Dead.

Sam is Dead

This is the final ending act of the original trilogy, which was released in 2012 along with the OF TAPE VOL.2 mixtape. This means that if we add it to the timeline we would get BASTARD > GOBLIN > SAM IS DEAD > WOLF. This is a really big thing going on and it scares me. it’s too much theory. send help. Now the name of the song is Sam is Dead which means we can assume that the three Tyler’s that are killed in this video are Ace, Tron Cat, and Wolf Haley. So the next part will explain what happens after these three are killed. Part two will be here shortly so stay tuned

[kiwitown-blog1]

APRIL 1 ~ Wellington

We are officially on break people!! (not known as spring break because well, its not spring here, also sometimes referred to as Easter break). My friend Emily and I left Dunedin on Saturday and flew to Wellington where were starting our north island road trip for the next week and a half! Upcoming locations include: Tongariro National Park, Taupo, Waitomo, Hahei, Auckland, Paihia (Bay of Islands), and Cape Reinga then driving back to Auckland to fly back down to Dunedin on Monday.

Saturday we flew into Wellington at around noon and picked up our rental car (a little Mazda Demio - very little). We’d complied a list of things to do but didnt really have set plans. The first day proved to be not the best weather day, no rain but extremely strong winds (Wellington is the windy city ya know), cloudy, but no rain so all on all not too bad. We went to Cuba St first (first picture), known to be a fun street with lots of restaurants, shops and cafes, and ate lunch at Fidel's per recommendation (would highly highly recommend in turn - I got the vegan nachos and kitchen sink cookie). Then we headed down to the water front where we found very little people and lots more wind. We ducked in and found an underground market (second picture) in an underground parking garage where I found a stand making science jewelry, to get a sense I bought a double helix DNA silver ring and I’m VERY excited about it. We spent most of our time down by the water bu considering the weather decided to spend the rest of out time at Te Papa, the museum of NZ. It was completely free and a really high quality museum worth checking out if anyone ever decides to visit Wellington. Third picture is me with a reconstruction of a MOA getting struck by a Haas eagle. I cant remember if I’ve gone on about moa yet, but its one of NZ’s indigenous flightless bird species but were one freakin big bird. They get mentioned in a lot of my classes so I’m slightly obsessed. Then we hit the grocery store and found our airbnb (fit w cat Thomas, a nice touch), watched half of Mary Poppins and went to bed.

Sunday was our full day in windy Welly. We struggled but eventually found the cable car up one of the larger hills of the city (fourth picture) and then spent some time in the botanical gardens. I was reaaally excited to go to Zealandia where we went next (sixth picture). It’s basically a massive reserve built on the land of an old water reservoir (including a massive damn we walked over), but put an 8 meter high fence around the entire complex, with the fence also going a full meter into the ground. Like I’ve mentioned NZ originally had no natural scavenging mammals or predators, no weasels, rats, possums, dogs, cats, nothing. That’s why so many species of flightless birds evolved in NZ, and then were quickly driven to extinction/endangered when human traveling brought them around. The fence keeps all these animals out, and I believe is one of the most successful at bringing back some of the critical species like kiwi and kakas. The place has day and night tours after hours to try to spot kiwi, glowworms, owls and other nocturnal animals. We did see a lot of tui, kakas and fantails for birds and some tuataras (native lizard species).

The rest of the afternoon we headed back to the waterfront but this time there were loads of people there, a much better vibe than the day before. If I ever see any of you Ill have to show you video, but theres one part of the boardwalk thats cut out and has a staircase at two flights tall for people to jump off of into the water. We ran into a bunch of people jumping and flipping off. First it was just a group of Maori guys and then other followed including one sister and brother, who were probably only like 5 and 7 and finally summoned the courage to jump off the damn thing. Their parents were encouraging them the whole time leading up to it but honestly I was afraid the jump was too big for their little bodies. They did it though, and then did it at least 3 more times sooo I guess they were fine. To finish off the day we drove up Mt. Victoria to watch the sunset (last picture) which was an amazing view and then headed back.

One thing we failed to consider at least for these first couple days was how much Easter impacted everything. I’ve learned pretty quickly that most things close entirely on Sundays and have very restricted hours if any on Saturdays. Saturday, our first day wasn’t very different, though less people were out because of the weather. However Sunday and Monday are both public holidays, therefore only certain things are allowed to be open/conduct business exchanges. Finding places to eat for dinner on Sunday was a little bit hard as most restaurants and shops in general were closed further. None of this impacted our activity plans per se but we definitely had to be a little more conscious of what we were trying to do.

Next were moving to Taupo/Tongaririo area (cue Lord of the Rings fans for Mt. Doom!!).