#there's also another older guy who is an absolute delight to talk to

[yourplaceinaugust]

who i thought would be my favourite customers after starting my cashier job: queer people around my age

who actually ended up being my favourite customers after working as a cashier for two years: random older men

[arolesbianism]

Vibrates. Normal. I'm normal. I'm so normal.

[cawsceries]

your ocs 🔫 tell me everything and anything you wanna share

HI CRYPT i have a lot :]

so i have four main guys with an actual storyline (avry arlo rass rocks). technically five but the fifth doesn't have a name yet so we're not talking about her. and then i have funky little guys (moth, some other clones who i havent posted, and my newest guys cobra and lio!!)

avry is in her early twenties! she was knighted roughly a month before the clone wars began and wasn't supposed to lead a battalion at first. the jedi master who was going to lead the 409th battalion was several weeks away from kamino as the clone wars started, though, and avry was temporarily assigned to the 409th because she's closer and there isn't time to wait.

this temporary assignment is when she first met arlo, who at the time was a captain. in their third or fourth battle, the LAAT/i that was carrying arlo was shot down and his helmet was knocked off in the crash. avry lifted the rubble of the LAAT/i off of the survivors of the crash using the force-- if she hadn't been there, arlo probably would've bled out from his head injury before anyone managed to get to him.

shortly after this, the jedi master in charge of the 409th finally arrives! she's an older rodian training her second padawan, rass. she and avry's master are padawan siblings. avry leaves the 409th in the jedi master's capable hands and is assigned on several small relief missions.

of course, a few months later the 409th has an encounter with general grievous. the jedi master does not survive, but she does make sure rass will make it out alive.

avry is in the area, so she returns to the 409th. rass is supposed to go back to the jedi temple but they can't fathom leaving all of the clones they've befriended and fought beside-- they've already lost their master. so avry (impulsively) offers to take rass on as her own padawan.

and. well. this solves some problems. this also creates more problems. avry is already absolutely terrified about being responsible for a battalion. now she's also responsible for rass as well, who's basically her little sibling. she's not prepared for either of these things, but she's good enough at faking it so she's not going to think about it too much because she might break down and there isn't time for that. she can process everything when the war is over and everything goes back to normal.

she's very good at convincing herself that things will go back to normal.

arlo is doing better overall-- he's been promoted to commander (the original commander died a few weeks after avry left). he has a lot of confidence in avry. between avry saving his life early on, and the jedi master's competence and poise, he's a little ridiculously loyal to the jedi.

he's also a little bit blind to avry's flaws.

hold on. about arlo's pronouns: she is not thinking about her gender in universe until pretty late in the clone wars. i swap between she and he because she will end up using she/he pronouns.

rass meets rocks when their first master is still alive, while scouting out a droid factory. rass is leading rocks' squad and there are droids coming their direction. rass asks the clones if any of them have something that rass can throw to distract the droids. rocks hands over a rock. a few minutes later rass asks for another object. rocks hands over another rock. he has at least ten more.

rass nearly compromises the mission by laughing at the fifth rock produced. after this rass and rocks are inseparable. rocks, who is about an inch and a half shorter than the average clone, is delighted that he's no longer the shortest person he knows.

rass and rocks are my beloveds i love them dearly.

i also have a fair amount of info about avry here and some assorted info about all of these guys here

beyond my "main" four, i have moth (can be summed up by this and this) and cobra (very new guy. hes living his best life. having an affair with lio.) and lio (full name lio veniid. senator. a bit pretentious. not very significant politically. extremely disappointed by cobra's lack of appreciation for wine, has made it his goal in life to change this. its not working very well so far but they're both having a great time)

also fun fact: i have a curse in which i am incapable of drawing arlo's scar correct on any full piece. it's on the left side of her head. (forgot it) (flipped the canvas too many times)

[anhed-nia]

BLOGTOBER 10/8/2024 PART 3: ABBY

STANDARD DISCLAIMER: October 8 was another rabbit hole day of my Blogtober program, and I have managed to refrain from slapping a snarky nickname on this little marathon of American race-centric horror movies that raise some uncomfortable questions. Can white guys make compelling movies about Black anxieties? Can Black directors get away with making white actors say things white people shouldn't get away with saying? The answer is…it depends on who you ask!

And if you want to know why I'm capitalizing one word and not the other, it's because I generally agree with the AP statement about the lack of meaningful cultural commonalities between white-skinned people--other than generalized privilege, of course. In my mind, it is useful to talk about whiteness in political contexts, but it is not so useful to talk about a "White" ethnic identity unless you are into white pride, which I would prefer not to validate. I understand that this is not a perfect solution, and many people feel that the lowercase "w" supports the delusion of whiteness as the universal default for humanity. I do not want to invite a big heavy debate on my silly little movie blog, but you should feel free to comment with links to worthwhile discussions on this subject, as long as you are doing it in good faith and you are not a white supremacist asshole. END STANDARD DISCLAIMER

Due to Warner Bros' litigiousness, this poor movie is only available as a version pulled from a badly damaged print--but if you can make it through the fuzz and the scratches, it's pretty entertaining! The great William Marshall plays an archeologist-cum-exorcist who witlessly frees a Nigerian deity to possess his daughter-in-law Abby (Carol Speed), a pious suburban housewife. Abby soon transforms from a devout, hardworking preacher's wife into a sadistic sex maniac, and it will take more than the usual power of Christ to exorcise her.

ABBY is one of those films that reminds me to question what exactly is meant by "blaxploitation". There is a tendency to put that label on any all-Black genre film made between the 1960s and 1980s, though this is misguided. Blaxploitation is actually sort of hard to define. I tend to think of it as primarily describing movies that exploit Black stereotypes to entice audiences--Black or otherwise--who find them appealing; examples are BLACULA (great!) and BLACKENSTEIN (pretty dire). Such movies may be made by Black or white filmmakers. Blaxploitation can also describe exploitation movies made by and for Black audiences; Melvin van Peebles combined exploitation-style entertainment with sharp political messages, and Rudy Ray Moore made delightful vanity projects for himself and his friends from the Chitlin Circuit. You couldn't fairly say that either of those guys mainly exploited stereotypes and the audiences that enjoyed them, even though they did capitalize on them. On the other hand, I always bristle when people call GANJA & HESS a blaxploitation movie; I guess if the only older Black films you watch are in the blaxploitation category then that's what it looks like, but it is way too posh, intellectual, and experimental to participate in any exploitation category.

ABBY was made by William Girdler, who is white, and an interesting character in exploitation history. He turned out nine films in six years, including the incredible terrestrial JAWS knockoff GRIZZLY. Even when he was making a cash grab, he didn't skimp on entertainment value, and ABBY succeeds with its strong characters played by an absolutely stellar cast. This is certainly a blaxploitation film, as an African-flavored coattail-rider of a mainstream hit, replacing THE EXORCIST'S Pazuzu with a horny Yoruban Orisha. However, the main characters are all hardworking, upstanding suburbanites; even the nightclub scenes are full of regular folks having a good time, not insulting caricatures. Those scenes are actually the weakest of the film since they break up the movie's core cast with a bunch of extras.

William Marshall, best known as Blacula and also the King of Cartoons, is fabulous in this...although he also has a tendency to slow things down just because of his flamboyant style of speech-making. Carol Speed gives a gleefully perverted performance as Abby, though the Orisha is voiced by Bob Holt, who in 1972 voiced the Lorax and the Onceler. I know I shouldn't say "the Onceler" on this website, but the freaks who react to that could really stand to watch something as good as ABBY instead of continuously beating off to children's media. Uh anyway, the actual biggest star of this movie is Juanita Moore, who may not have much to do here, but she was nominated for a fucking Oscar for fucking Douglas Sirk's remake of fucking IMITATION OF LIFE. She is no fucking joke. And there's also the great Austin Stoker, famous for ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13. This movie may be a typical exploitation picture in many respects, but it is full of talent and made with care.

With all that said, just so I don't run the risk of making ABBY sound like more than it is, I should note that William Marshall expressed dismay at the loosely-handled African elements of the story. It sounds like he recommended some more respectful revisions, and was ignored. However, Carol Speed defended the film, for all that it misrepresents and rips off, as a terrific piece of entertainment. What she said could be applied to any number of exploitation classics: "There are no (new) stories since the Bible."

[redpiperfox]

(drops in by parachute) jeongin brings a pet fish home. how does each member of skz react, and does he convince each skz member to let him keep it?

(clears a helipad for you) well hiya!

oooooh okokokok so a couple thoughts came to mind instantly, and that's that jeongin is a Smol Child who just won a goldfish from a fair, and he shows up at home like darla from nemo with his dimply, innocent smile.

His dad Chan is mentally screaming bc they just moved in uncle Minho and his cats and kids and he can only imagine 20,000 ways this is going to end horribly. Including Jeongin overfeeding the goldfish and the lil guy goin belly up one morning and Chan having to scramble to buy an identical replacement fish and oh no is lying to your kid about their fish dying setting them up with false expectations for life damnit it is isnt it i dont wanna have the Death talk with my kid over his pet fish i still get cold sweats whenever he brings up his dead mom oh no oh this is such a bad idea

He ends up going above and beyond and it's actually a really sweet bonding thing for them, because Chan makes this elaborate and safe tank for their goldfish buddy and only cleans then tank with Jeongin so they do it together and even considers getting more fish bc Jeongin runs home from school all excited to take care of the fishy and also ask Chan these sciency nerdy questions that he has fun looking up it's so wholesome.

Uncle Minho is horrendously amused. He takes every moment to tell Jeongin fish horror stories and how goldfish can survive being frozen and how they eat smaller fish and pet fish are prone to jump from the tank if the water is too high. He doesn't tell him that cats like to eat fish tho. He tells Innie that Soonie Doongie and Dori are just trying to introduce themselves and catch up with their new friend when they're by the tank (and he absolutely gives them a scolding of a lifetime each time bc he will NOT be the cause of a major trauma to his little nephew) Secretly, he thinks it'll finally help the little family recover from their recent loss and all the new changes and he's really really happy about the goldfish.

Neighbor Changbin is absolutely delighted. He's probably more in love with the pet fish than Jeongin is because it finally gives him an idea what to gift the kid for holidays and bdays. He sucks with kids older than baby and under the age of teen, he has no idea how to interact with them, and it amuses Everyone to no end, but it's sweet when he's over their house and right next to Innie nose to the glass of the tank watching the goldfish come up and try to peck at them.

Older brother Hyunjin is at first Very Indignant that Innie got a fish before they got a dog. It's been years since Berry died and Hyunjin has religiously asked for another dog to fill the void, and Chan has been adamently against it (he's gone through enough heartbreak alright he doesn't wanna keep doing this) particularly with Minho and his kids moving in. He's door-slamy and mean to Jeongin about it until one night he sees Jeongin sitting on the kitchen floor staring at the tank because it had gotten sick and Chan had to clean the fish with a special treatment everyday and "Mum got sick and needed treatment everyday and then she died, i dont want my new friend to die" and oh, hyunjin sits on the floor with him and stares at the fish tank and realizes how peaceful and nice it is to have a fish and that Jeongin has something to help his lil brain cope. He carries Innie to bed that night and doesn't complain anymore.

Cousins Jisung and Felix are indignant and insistant that they get fish too. Minho has to remind them 1) they just moved in they're literally borrowing space in their Uncle Chan's house (Chan is against this argument and insists they treat the space like their own) and 2) they have cats. three cats. One for each of them if they so feel moved to having a pet of their own. Felix is all "Oh yeah" but Jisung slaps a hand over his mouth and goes "Can't put the cats in a tank! Can't tap the glass and make them come to our finger! Can't--!" and he goes on and on and on until Minho finally goes "Prove to me you can help your cousin with taking care of his fish then we'll see." And Jisung tries sooo hard to be the big older cousin and tries to show Jeongin he's better than him at taking care of fish than him in a show then ends up with the fish on the ground, Jeongin screaming, Minho flying to get the fish back in the tank, and Hyunjin chewing him out. Felix is so traumatized by Jeongin crying, Hyunjin yelling, Minho looking like he's aged 30 years from the experience, and Chan somehow going paler than a ghost, that he slaps a hand over Jisung's mouth whenever he so much as breathes a thought about getting a fish. Jisung doesn't except in his dreams and even then he wakes up in a cold sweat (with Felix's hand over his mouth) and thinks cats are really cool.

Seungmin is the reason for this mess. He made Jeongin play a game at the fair on the way home from school. He knew it would be a mess. Jeongin told him it would be difficult to bring a fish home with everything going on. Seungmin just smiled and handed him the ball and told him how to knock the cans down. He smooth talked him into thinking everything would work out and that his dad loves him a lot anyway and Hyunjin wants a pet and it would give him something to gloat over his cousins about and yadda yadda yadda.

He absolutely live for the stories Jeongin tells him everday about what goes on in their house thanks to this goldfish.

Chan gives him weird looks whenever he comes over. They both know what he did. Chan could never prove it. Minho is going to try to one of these days, but good luck to him, Seungmin takes secrets to his grave.

[mermaidsirennikita]

I watched Pretty Woman when I was around 12. Which, first of all, my mom let me watch and read anything.

It pretty much encoded in my brain. It also played an important role in my fascination with older men with silver hair. And I love everything about it. I know it's problematic and stuff. But it's so good. Everything is perfect, casting, music, story, acting, cinematography. Romantic movies don't commit like this. I miss the beautiful, curly hair and the romantic ballads. It feels as if Hollywood is allergic to romance now.

I'm suffering from lack of good romantic movies. Please recommend some good movies.

If it makes you feel any better, I was probably younger than 12 when my mom like MADE me watch it with her lmao

And I agree so much with everything you have to say about it. Pretty Woman is, to me, the Iconique romance movie. It feels more like a romance novel, to me, than most movies. And it's sooooo sexy.

For other romantic movies, I'd recommend:

Brown Sugar (2002). This one is really fun because both of the protagonists make really bad choices sometimes! He marries the wrong person, she gets with the wrong person, it's friends to lovers the way it should be done (ie with a lot of angst). But you still root for them to get together! Also, Taye Diggs gives an absolutely perfect line delivery (like several) in this clip.

(We gonna celebrate--what? *clink clink* MY DIVOOOOOORCE!)

Always Be My Maybe (2019). Another example of friends to lovers done right, though it's really one of the things I love in books too, which is "childhood friends to strangers to lovers". So good. Also, the single best usage of a celebrating playing themselves ever with Keanu Reeves.

Imagine Me and You (2005). A sweet sapphic romcom with a bit of a moral quandary in the premise... A woman is walking down the aisle to her husband, looks over, sees florist Lena Headey, and understandably falls in love with florist Lena Headey. But like, she didn't even know she was bi, let alone that florist Lena Headey existed, so--what now? Cheesy in a very sweet way. Actually plays with infidelity in a manner that movies kinda don't as much at the moment (Brown Sugar does as well). Yet it remains heartwarming.

Faraway (2023). Nobody ever talks about this movie, even though it has so many things we always say we want—like a woman over 40 who isn't stick thin falling in love with a man over 40 who also doesn't have this insanely ripped body (and he remains hot, to be clear). In this one, a woman finds out her husband is PROBABLY cheating on her on the day of her mother's funeral. She also finds out that her mom had a secret house in Croatia! And when she goes to that house to get away from her family, there's Some Guy squatting there! And now she's kind of in a love triangle with Some Guy and a younger real estate developer who wants to buy the property...? It's delightful. I need to rewatch it.

Hit Man (2023 though let's be real it's a 2024 movie). Anyone who hasn't seen this yet--it's a romcom. It's a whole romcom. With sex in it. It's very funny, it made me attracted to Glen Powell against my will, he eats this girl out a kitchen island (and she thinks he's a hit man she almost hired to kill her husband). It's definitely got a touch of darkness, but everyone who suffers deserves to because they're like, abusive husbands and racist predatory cops. Hell yeah.

Amelie (2001). I'm sure everyone has seen Amelie by now, but if you haven't, watch Amelie. It's everything it's cracked up to be.

Argylle (2024). YEAH. YEAH. I'M PUTTING THIS ON HERE. Everyone shat all over Argylle, and I was like oh shit, what even is Argylle??? I don't wanna spoil too much, but did you know that Argylle pretty much ends on two people making out as they speed away from whimsical chaos??? Did you know that Argylle has like.. AN AMNESIA ROMANCE PLOT??? It's goofy as fuck and it is delightful.

Lisa Frankenstein (2024). Another recent one that is actually so romantic. And the monster uses a giant Hitachi magic wand on Lisa Frankenstein. Good for her.

The Through My Window trilogy I will always cite as Euroteen romance movie excellence. Like, the second movie is kinda rough, but the third makes up for it completely. It is soapy, it is ridiculous, it is EVERYTHING a good Wattpad movie should be except there's also like, an actual earnest heart to it. Ares is a king among men. Raquel is batshit insane but gets away with it because she is That Girl. I love it.

Anyway, this is far from a complete list, but try these for like, the heart feelings.

[swifty-fox]

Send me a fic of mine and I'll answer...

A Kingdom for a Kiss?

THIS GOT SO LONG I AM SORRY

My favorite scene

oh god that is so hard to choose.

I think honestly chapter eighteen/the second sex scene is my favorite scene. It is the culmination of so many issues in Gale's psyche, especially around John and Gale's perception of their dynamic. Taking all that and flipping it right on its head.

Previously in the story Gale is so obsessed with the ways he is not like John in terms of his masculinity and terms of how he expects John to be in bed. Every fantasy of his is tinged with shame and twisted in terms of gender and role because Gale cannot picture himself as an active participant. It doesn't feel safe for him because it feels too unrealistic for John to ever want him as a man, so he pretends to be a woman in his fantasies to ground him (comphet is a hell of a drug)

We do see briefly in one fantasy that Gale does want to take charge in bed but it scares him, feels too close and too real so he shies away from it. Chapter Eighteen is all about him coming to terms with his own desires. And also John is a really fun bottom to write

My favorite chapter (if it's a multichapter)

Lmao the book fingering chapter. It was fun to just let loose and do something really unhinged. Plus any scene/chapter where I got to write Gale and John Sr. interacting was just really fun they had a ton of chemistry as characters and were just a blast to bounce off of each other.

Hardest scene to write

Honestly the whole story flowed relatively easy. I think my biggest struggles were the James chapters just because I wanted to get the tone/intention and dynamic exactly right between Gale and James. I needed to make it clear that Gale was willingly putting himself in a situation that was going to trigger/mentally harm him. He was committing an act of self harm, just with sex instead of some sort of physical wounding. And that while James was not a great guy he was as far as he could tell, receiving full consent from Gale. So that chapter went through a couple revisions and was sent to a lot of people for review

Favorite character to write in the fic

John Sr.!!!! I think he's a delightful foil to Gale and John. I think he can be very easy to hate and be angry at because we care so much about John, but when you get into his head a bit you see a man who was making harmful choices but was doing what he thought was best because he is also deeply traumatized and hurting. He Is John and Gale, in essence. He's them twenty/thirty years in the future and he's them if they were not able to find community and safe space to talk about their experiences in the war. His brothers were killed, his parents died/killed themselves he left for war with a full family and came home to just a wife and a young son who didn't recognize him.

I have so much love and empathy for him and it was totally unexpected. Does he make great decisions? no. Is he trying his best to not just be a father to John but also to Edie and a good husband to his wife? Absolutely he is.

Favorite dynamic to write in the fic

Aside from Clegan obviously, It's Gale and John Sr.

I think like John says in the opening theme they're very similar men deep down. I think they're able to communicate in ways the more emotional Bucky is not able to with his father. While they always loved each other I think there was always this slight issue of communication between them where they just don't quite get one another.

Gale, with his observational ability and honestly, some level of fear of John Sr. (older fatherly men etc.) he's very attuned and attentive not just what John Sr. is saying out loud but also what he is not saying. There's a lot of nonverbal communication between them that is fun to write between the lines.

Why I chose that title

My body turns

And yearns for a sleep that won't ever come

It's never over

My kingdom for a kiss upon her shoulder

It's never over

All my riches for her smiles

When I've slept so soft against her

obviously pronouns changed, but this is the part of the song I pulled the title from. The song is just all about yearning and a missed opportunity which is I think a very central theme to Kfak. Obviously it works out for them too but god it took a second to get there!

A fun fact about the fic

Fun fact ooo lets see...

John calls his dad Pops because it's time period appropriate but also that's what I called my grandfather! It feels like a nice little hello to him every time I write it and it's a fun way of keeping my memory of him alive and fresh. John Sr. is not like my pops at all but either way it makes me smile to type

[fairykukla]

Have we lost the ability to throw a drink in someone's face? Have we lost the ability to say, "I don't think so, bud" or "No, thank you" or, "This vibe is rancid, I'm going to leave"?

There was an incident at a party recently, where an older man was being friendly with a nonbinary person young enough to be his child. And when I say, "Friendly" I mean that he was being flirty and getting into their space.

Some of the breakdown in communication was that the younger person, being nervous and uncomfortable, responded with smiles and giggling. I'm not blaming the victim, here; the older man really should not have been trying to foster intimacy with a person that young, someone in a relationship with the child of his best friend. *This was not cool.*

But I worry that these youngsters aren't being taught the art of saying no, clearly and concisely. It's a really important skill. When a pushy salesman tries to bulldoze you, you need to know how and when to put down a hard stop. When a friend tries to get you to do something that you think is dangerous or just hits you with a Bad Vibe, you need to know how to say "No" in a way that doesn't nuke the friendship. (You also need to know when to nuke the friendship, but that's another story for another time.)

Creeps exist, folks. People we don't expect to be creepy will pull creepy stunts. People we do expect to be creeps will meet our expectations. Sometimes you see the creep coming, sometimes you don't see it until the behaviour occurs. And creeps can be any gender! I've met some spectacular female creeps! But it does seem to infect the Cisgender male population more intensely.

And for all you know, this might be Dudebro's first, bashful foray into using creepy pick up strategies he read on some disgusting reddit thread.

You have an opportunity to stop Dudebro right here. At the very least, you need to alert the other person to the fact that you are uncomfortable.

1. You don't owe creeps anything. Even if it's someone you know, you still don't owe the creep anything.

2. Don't feed the creep. If this person creeps on you, anything that encourages the creep just makes the creeping stronger.

3. Calling out creepy behaviour doesn't mean destroying a relationship. Just like calling out a racist comment, a transphobic attitude or ableism, it's absolutely possible to tell someone that they need to check their behaviour from a position of love and respect.

4. Your boundaries are important. This includes personal space, conversational boundaries, and physical boundaries.

5. In order for your boundaries to be respected, you absolutely HAVE to express them, clearly and unambiguously.

6. High pressure sales tactics basically boil down to straight up trickery. It's about hacking into a person's head to manipulate them into doing something they don't actually want to do. Educate yourself about sales tactics, please please please. These tactics are used by con artists, salespeople, recruiters, and guys looking to score.

Here's a thought exercise: There's a person out there who loves to be touched by strangers, is delighted by threatening jokes, and really does want a potential partner to be very pushy. That's a super rare person, but imagine that the Creep's only social experience is with this person. You have to be clear about your boundaries and never assume that your needs are obvious or "normal." None of your needs are unreasonable, but they are unique to you.

So:

DB: (Creeps on you.)

You: No, thank you.

DB: I just wanted to talk to you

You: You're in my personal space. Please leave me alone.

DB: Well, that's rude.

You: No, you're being rude. I didn't invite you to talk to me. Please don't be a creep.

DB: You're being a bitch!

You: (to friends, the bartender, the bouncer, to any other potential ally in the room) Excuse me, this guy's being a real creep, can you help me out?

This is a scary situation, for sure. You can be brave, and you can express yourself clearly, and you can pull in allies if you need them. Here's another:

Creep: You know, you're really mature for your age.

You: Oh, that's the trauma.

Creep: trauma? What happened to you? Can you talk about it with me?

You: when guys creep on me it makes me have to act very mature for my age. It's because they're being really immature and I have to compensate for it.

Creep: That sounds really tough.

You: I saw this in an old movie once. This super mature woman threw a drink in the face of this guy who was being really creepy to her.

Creep: Wait. You mean me? I'm not a creep.

You: Yeah, actually you are. Can you please give me my personal space back?

I know what you're thinking. You're worried that things will escalate quickly into violence or threats, right? The important clue I have for you here is to get out early, get out often, don't let someone corner you or separate you from your support structures. If you identify someone as being a threat early on, and say so to the people around you, it's less likely for the creep to morph into an asshole.

So what if it's your friend? If you witness creepy behaviour in one of your friends, it's ok to call them out on it. "Hey, watch it, you're getting a little bit creepy there." Friends don't let friends get creepy! Don't wait until it becomes a big problem!

So here's the TL:DR

Dealing with creeps 101:

Step 1: stop smiling. Don't offer any encouragement.

Step 2: establish boundaries. (You're too close, I wasn't talking to you, I'm here with my friends, I have work to do.)

Step 3: involve assistance. (Ask your friends, an adult in the room, security personnel, etc.)

[bridgertonbabe]

I can just see the two years of Sophie being at school without Benedict in the Meet me at Midnight AU poor Ember is knackered from sending owls along with Benedict’s constantly and him sending her flowers and treats weekly as she gets through the week and rewards for her amazing marks

Colin trying to point out other guys for Sophie and Mike and Phillip being all “dude… Cavender really? Never gonna work.” And Mike already claiming godfather dibs on their babies and asking to officiate their wedding and Colin just wanting to cry at the talk

And then Benedict turning up on Hogsmede weekends

Colin finally coming to his senses and finally realising that they’re clearly made for one another, but I can see it being something like a freak accident in Potions or something (Colin accidentally putting the entirely wrong ingredient into the potion and it blowing up on Sophie or someone deliberately trying to compromise her NEWT project) and shes rushed to either the hospital wing or it’s so bad she’s took to St Mungos (cause we know I love a bit of angst) and Benedict turning up, having been in the middle of painting completely frantic and heartbroken at it all and Colin finally getting it…

And actually it being Colin who asks Benedict if he wants to come on their interrailling tour because he doesn’t want Sophie to be sad and away from him for too long

Colin had been really looking forward to starting their sixth year of Hogwarts, specifically because with his older brother now graduated he no longer had to endure Sophie and him being besottedly lovey-dovey 24/7 as they had been throughout the second half of fifth year and all summer long. At long last there would be semblance of the Awesome Foursome as they used to be before Sophie and Benedict got together, and Colin hoped thinks would revert to normal.

However Benedict still continued to annoy his brother without being physically present as every single damn morning Sophie would stop listening to whatever Colin was saying as soon as Clement had swooped in or Ember had crash-landed with a letter in tow from her boyfriend. Eagerly she'd open it then and there and turn all heart-eyed as she read through his correspondence, which caused Colin to roll his eyes because what could they possibly have to write about to each other every single bloody day? And it wasn't just letters; Benedict would also send her packages containing treats every Friday as well as photos and small paintings he had done just for her.

As annoying as the couple was, Colin thought he at least had until Christmas before he'd have to suffer the ordeal of playing third-wheel to them back at home; but much to his chagrin on the first Hogsmeade weekend of sixth year he came to an abrupt halt as soon as he laid eyes on Benedict when the gang entered The Three Broomsticks Inn. Sophie had squealed in delight from her boyfriend's unexpected appearance and had jumped into his arms before they grabbed a table and Benedict bought them a round of butterbeer. Colin simply couldn't believe that his brother would go so far as to encroach on their Hogsmeade weekend just to spend time with Sophie, and spent the rest of the day grumbling under his breath in a sulk, which the rest of the group paid no mind to as they enjoyed their trip in the local town. For the rest of the year Benedict met them on every Hogsmeade trip and while he would happily hang out with them as a group, for a couple of hours at least he and Sophie would break off by themselves to spend some time alone, something which Phillip and Michael (like the absolute traitors they were) affably encouraged them to do.

Sophie and Benedict were still going from strength to strength heading into seventh year and while Colin had at this point become accustomed to the fact that they were very much an item, it didn't mean his exasperation caused by their relationship had eased any further. Fortunately for Colin, on the first Hogsmeade weekend of the new school year Benedict was away, and so the friendship group remained in tact without any hangers-on and it felt nice to have Sophie's undivided attention within the group again after so long. However, it didn't go unnoticed by other students that Sophie's boyfriend hadn't made it to their regular Hogsmeade meet up as he had done for the previous year.

"Oi, Bridgerton." Cavender sidled up to Colin just as they had left Charms. "Is it true Sophie and your brother are on the rocks?"

"What?" Colin asked, not having anticipated the line of questioning.

"Well he was a no-show at the weekend, wasn't he? So it's got people talking that they've broken up, and on top of that apparently he's stopped sending her letters; so have they?"

Colin opened his mouth to clarify that the reason behind Benedict's absence was because his brother had gone abroad with Henry and Wetherby to visit several European art galleries, and as a result his correspondence with Sophie had been reduced to every third day compared to their daily back and forth.

"I'm not sure." were the words that ended up leaving Colin's mouth instead. "It's between them." he shrugged and tried to ignore the growing feeling of unease forming in his stomach due to his fibbing. "Why'd you ask?"

"Well if she's been dumped then I'd be the first in line to offer her a shoulder to cry on." Cavender smirked darkly. "So if you're saying there's a chance,"

"Look, I wouldn't know." Colin interjected. "He's my brother and she's my best friend so I just stay out of it."

"No, I get you." Cavender winked at him before giving him a pat on the back and sauntering off.

Colin decided to shake off the gnawing in his stomach that he had just done something wrong, and instead opted to think that the conversation was perfectly harmless and wouldn't lead to any far-reaching consequences further down the line. And everything seemed that way until several days later when during break time in the courtyard where he was hanging out with Phillip and Michael, Sophie stormed up to him with a furrowed look of consternation across her face.

"Why did you tell Cavender that Ben dumped me?" she asked point-blankly in lieu of any greeting.

Phillip and Michael whipped their heads to Colin as disbelief contorted their expressions.

"I didn't tell him that!" Colin spluttered, since those words had never actually left his mouth.

"Well then why did he have that impression after talking to you?"

"I... I don't know." Colin swallowed, even though he knew exactly the reason why.

"Really? So you didn't give him the go ahead to hit on me and offer to show me a good time?!"

"Colin, what the fuck?!" Phillip swore as Michael closed his eyes and shook his head exasperatedly.

"I never fucking said any of that!" Colin argued, frustrated by whatever yarn Cavender had spun to Sophie.

"Well why did you let him think he could?" Sophie exclaimed.

"Look, he was just asking if you were single because he was interested-"

"And did you put him right?" Sophie interrupted. "Did you tell him that I'm in a loving relationship with your brother, or did that slip your mind somehow?"

"Sophie, I didn't encourage him!" Colin insisted - ignoring the fact that he did nothing to discourage his peer either. "But is it so wrong for someone else to show interest in you?"

He wasn't too surprised by the bewildered expression of fury pulling on Sophie's face in response to his question.

"I have a boyfriend!" she stated.

"Exactly, and he's all you've ever known." Colin replied. "All this time you've had tunnel vision for Ben and Ben alone and you've never thought to look around and consider anyone else, that there might be others out there who like you just as much or maybe even more than Ben and you're missing out."

Sophie stared at him like his head had just shrunk to the size of a pygmy puff. She glanced to both Michael and Phillip before staring incredulously at Colin once more.

"I'm in love with your brother, Colin! Why the hell would you want me to be considering anyone else?!"

"Oh so you think Ben's back home holed up in his room pining after you hour after hour? You think he isn't going out with Anthony or his mates and checking out other girls, being tempted by other girls, having fun with other girls as he waits for you to graduate school? Because if you think he isn't then you're far more naive than I thought you were. So excuse me for trying to help you realise that there's plenty of other fish in the sea for when Ben outgrows you and ends things!"

Sophie stared at her best friend, her mouth open ajar and her eyes glistening with upset from what he had just thrown back at her. Colin maintained her gaze, if only to ignore the daggers Phillip and Michael were glaring into him in his periphery. He was expecting a rebuttal, for Sophie to scream something back at him; but instead she shook her head miserably, turned on her feet, and marched off. Phillip glared at him and strode straight after her, catching up to her in seconds as they went back inside.

Colin wasn't shocked when he received a smack around the head a second later.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Michael growled at him. "Why would you say any of that to her?"

"I'm just preparing her-"

"Preparing her for what?! When has your brother shown anything other than utter love and devotion to her?"

"They're too young to be this settled-"

"Oh what, you mean like Anthony and Kate? You mean like your parents were?" Michael retorted. "Face it, this has nothing to do with you looking out for Sophie's best interests! This is just you being a massive fucking prick for no good reason!"

Michael began to storm off too before turning on his heel to face Colin again.

"And Cavender? Really? Of all people to stand back for and let them have a shot with her, that's who you gave the go ahead to? You really are a fucking idiot." Michael swore before kissing his teeth and shooting Colin a dirty glare before stalking off.

For the remainder of the term Colin had to lie in the bed he had made for himself as only Michael maintained his companionship (and Colin was sure that was only reluctantly since they shared a dormitory and sat together in most of their classes). Sophie went out of her way to avoid him at every single turn and Phillip aligned himself with her while making it clear to Colin he wasn't going to forgive him until Sophie had, judging by the stony-face he was always met with from him whenever he looked over in their direction.

Back at Aubrey Hollow for Christmas, Colin had anticipated some sort of showdown, having expected Sophie to tell all to Benedict about their falling out but much to his surprise his brother seemed puzzled by the recent division between the pair. Colin had thought he and Sophie would have to talk eventually since they would share his bedroom like they always had, but instead his parents had allowed Sophie to share Benedict's bed now that she was eighteen. It meant that there was little to no crossover between them over the course of the festive break and even if she wasn't with Benedict, Sophie surrounded herself with the rest of his family to keep Colin at arm's length. It was just as Colin was starting to think their friendship was beyond repair that there was a knock at his bedroom door and in walked Benedict and Sophie hand in hand, though the latter didn't look quite so thrilled to be there.

"Okay look," Benedict started with a sigh, giving Sophie's hand a squeeze as he looked to his brother, "I don't know what on earth has happened between you two since you both refuse to talk about it, but this can't go on. I know how much you mean to each other, you've been best friends all this time and I'd hate to see you fall out over... well, whatever it is you've fallen out over, okay? So, I'm going to leave you to talk things out and I just hope that you can make amends. Really, I hate seeing you both like this and I just don't see what could have gotten between you for this to even happen in the first place."

With one last squeeze of Sophie's hand and giving her a quick peck on the cheek, Benedict gave an imperative nod to his brother before exiting the room and closing the door after him. Silence hung between the two friends, with Colin sat on his bed while Sophie hovered in the middle of his bedroom with her arms crossed, both of them equally uncomfortable as the other.

"You didn't tell him anything?" Colin broke the pained silence.

"As much as I can't bear to be around you, I didn't want to see Ben beat you up or duel you for what you said." she replied.

He nodded, appreciative that in spite of her disdain for him that she still considered him enough to not want to set Benedict on him and upset the relationship between the brothers.

"I know you clearly don't like me and Ben being together, and I know we irritate you... but I never thought you were cruel enough to say the things you did. That you thought I was punching above my weight with Ben-"

"No, no, no, no, no!" Colin jumped to his feet, immediately concerned by Sophie's croaking voice. "Sophie, I never thought for a second you were punching with him, that's not what I think."

"Then why did you say-"

"Because I'm the world's biggest arsehole! Everything I said was just me being hurtful and pathetic for no other reason than... I don't even know why. Sophie, I really am so sorry for upsetting you and saying a bunch of things that had no weight behind them. You're right, I was cruel and I was not just a lousy friend but a lousy brother for painting Ben out to be like that just to be a dick. I don't expect you to forgive me and honestly I wouldn't blame you if you never did, but I miss our friendship so much. Ben's right, you mean so much to me and I hate not being friends with you. I just want to make things right between us again-"

He stopped short when Sophie threw her arms around him and hugged him tightly, an embrace he immediately latched onto and hugged her back in equal measure, relieved by the physical show of forgiveness even if he didn't think he quite deserved it.

"I've really missed you too." she told him. "And I'm sorry for upsetting you-"

"Nothing you've ever done has upset me." he assured her. "I'm entirely at fault here, Soph. I'm just... I'm just a stupid piece of shit, really. And don't try to say I'm not."

"Well okay, if you insist." she exhaled with amusement into his shoulder and Colin was just relieved to have his best friend back and to be able to make laugh again.

Once they had returned to Hogwarts the Awesome Foursome were reunited once more, with Michael and Phillip both willing to move past the fallout now that Colin had Sophie's forgiveness, and the reunion arrived just in time as preparation for their NEWTs kicked off. Together they studied and revised and kept each other sane, though Sophie seemed noticeably distressed more than usual ahead of the exams, but that was understandable with the pressure weighing down on them all more than ever to do well.

A welcome break for the gang was Quidditch, with Colin and Michael as Hufflepuff beaters, and Sophie and Phillip as substitute Ravenclaw seeker and keeper respectively. While Colin and Michael helped their house romp to victory in their second game of the school year against Gryffindor, Sophie and Phillip were called up as last minute substitutes ahead of Ravenclaw's match against Slytherin.

When he wasn't playing for Hufflepuff, Colin was one of the student commentators and so his voice was echoing around the Quidditch pitch during the Ravenclaw versus Slytherin game, barely trying to conceal his bias for the former team with two of his best friends playing on it (regardless of his two younger sisters playing for the opposing team). Slytherin were being thrashed by the competition, with little to no chance of ever defying the odds, and their fate was all but sealed as soon as the snitch appeared and Sophie sped off to claim victory for her team. Colin boastfully narrated his friend weaving her way through the stands in her chase of the fluttering golden ball, watching her intently as she reached out to catch the snitch - but then in flew Cavender.

Cavender was one of the Slytherin chasers and yet there was a beater's bat in his hand. It would be understandable if one of his beaters had dropped it and he had managed to catch it for them, or even if he was using it to hit an oncoming bludger headed his way; but there were no bludgers at his end of the pitch. Instead he was soaring towards Sophie armed with a bat, his face red with a demonic grin; and while aiming for her, he swung.

Despite being on the opposite side of the oval pitch, Colin heard the crack as loud and clear as if he was right next to it. Gasps went up all around the pitch and across the stands and everyone watched as Sophie dropped instantly from her broom, falling like a ragdoll towards the earth below her. Someone's yelling was sounding all around, but Colin was too hysterical to realise that it was coming from him crying out into the microphone as he watched his best friend plummeting through the air - until Phillip snatched her up in his arms after making a desperate dive for her.

Colin barely even remembered how he got from the commentator's box to the infirmary, it was all a blur; all he could focus on was his best friend lying unconscious in the hospital wing as he clutched her hand. Phillip, still in his keeper's uniform, was clutching her other hand, and Michael was holding her ankle at the end of the bed; all three of them praying for her to wake up soon. Sitting on a free neighbouring bed also shaken up by the events were Colin's three younger sisters as well as Posy and Penelope as they worriedly held vigil for Sophie's health.

He didn't know how long they had been sat waiting there for any news when suddenly the doors to the hospital wing burst open and Benedict stormed in, followed after by his parents and Kate. As soon as Benedict caught sight of Sophie, Colin could see his blanched face pale even more, and Phillip swiftly moved out of the way to allow a frantic Benedict to take his place in holding her hand.

"What on earth happened?" Violet gasped as Edmund stared in horror at Sophie while Kate brought a hand to her mouth.

"A member of the Slytherin team hit her over the head with a beater's bat." Professor Danbury explained.

"By accident?" Edmund swallowed.

"No." Daphne, dressed in her Slytherin Quidditch robes, shook her head right away. "It wasn't an accident."

"He snatched Eloise's bat from her and just took off after Sophie." Posy said.

"Why would someone do this to her? Who could want to hurt her?" Violet shook her head in shock.

"Unfortunately Mr Cavender has been causing problems for quite some time now." Professor Danbury exhaled, and Colin watched the way Benedict kept his teary-eyed gaze focused on Sophie and gently caressed her face. "He's been reprimanded for several years for harassing some of his female peers, and sadly Sophie's been his most recent target."

"What do you mean?" Kate asked.

"Since the start of this term Mr Cavender has been reported for verbally abusing Sophie in the hallways, spreading false rumours about her around school, and making sexually inappropriate comments towards her."

Colin's face fell and he cracked his neck towards the headteacher, stunned by the revelation that Cavender had been targeting Sophie behind his back. Though, when he cast a look at his friends, both Phillip and Michael seemed just as taken aback by the news as he was. How on earth had none of them been aware of what was going on with their own best friend?

"What? If that's the case then why weren't we informed?!" Violet demanded to know, frowning at the headteacher for answers.

"It was other teachers and prefects who reported the harassment to me. Mr Cavender was warned and given punishments on several occasions, and I even called Sophie to my office to let her know we were doing everything we could to put an end to the situation. I told her I'd contact you as her guardians to inform you of what was happening but she begged me not to." Danbury explained. "She insisted she didn't want any fuss and that she didn't want to concern anyone undeservedly. I explained that we needed to let you know regardless but she pleaded with me not to and justified that if the situation was put to rest that nobody needed to be informed. She was so desperate for there not to be any trouble that I relented but I asked her if she was at least confiding in her friends about it, that she at least had people to talk about it with, though now I realise she really was trying to keep it all to herself, the poor thing."

Colin felt a pit burrowing in his stomach, an endless abyss of guilt that Sophie for whatever reason didn't feel comfortable or think it worthwhile to let anyone know about her ordeal by the hands of Cavender - a guy who he had essentially stood back to allow to go after her. When he looked to his brother he saw tears trickling down Benedict's face, utterly devastated that his girlfriend had been suffering in silence without telling anyone.

"Is she going to be okay?" Edmund asked despairingly to the matron as she joined them.

"She will be, though she'll be here for at least a week."

"How bad was it?"

"She suffered a fractured skull and swelling to the brain," Colin hung his head, clasping Sophie's limp hand in between his as he processed the severity of her injuries, "but I've already administered Skele-Gro and given her an elixir to ease the swelling. She'll be in quite a bit of pain when she comes round but I'll keep her medicated until she's fully healed and recovered."

As much as everyone who loved and cared about Sophie wanted to stay, the matron restricted the amount of visitors meaning the majority of them had to leave for the time being. With the matron estimating it would be a few hours at least until Sophie came round, Kate was able to encourage Phillip, Daphne, and Eloise - all still dressed in their Quidditch attire - to go change their clothes and she coaxed Posy, Francesca, Penelope, and Michael to get something to eat as well. As she shepherded them out of the hospital wing, Violet and Edmund followed Danbury to her office, wanting to witness for themselves Cavender's repercussions for his horrendous actions. It meant Colin and Benedict stayed by Sophie's bedside, sitting in forlorn companionable silence as they waited for her to wake up.

Colin kept looking from the state of his best friend, the bandages around her head offsetting the seemingly peaceful tranquility of her slumber, to his brother who was clearly suffering from heartache as he rested his face against the hand of hers he was clutching closely, intermittently pressing his lips against her hand as he willed her on to be okay. The guilt was eating Colin up inside, seeing what Cavender had done to his best friend, and all because he had been an immature brat over Sophie's relationship with his brother.

"I'm sorry." he choked out after they had been sitting there for who knows how long.

"What?" Benedict blinked a few seconds later, so fixated on Sophie that he barely registered his brother's voice.

"I'm sorry. For everything." Colin trembled. "This is all my fault."

"Colin?" Benedict frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"It's my fault she's lying here. That she's got a fractured skull and fricking swelling on the brain."

"Col," Benedict reached out and touched his arm, "this isn't your fault. It's that cretin's; he's the one who attacked her and has been harassing her. This isn't on you."

"He asked me if you two had broken up." Colin blurted out. "Back in October when you were away in Europe and didn't go to Hogsmeade, and I should have just shut him down then and there... but I was a prat, I was so stupid and thoughtless and instead of telling him you were still together I just acted like I didn't know. I never encouraged him to actually go after Sophie but I didn't discourage him either... and now he's done this to her and been harassing her all this time and it's all because of me, because I was petty and jaded for no fucking reason and... I'm the reason she's lying here." he sobbed, hating himself inherently for all the pain he had caused Sophie by giving Cavender and inch and thus letting Cavender take it to a mile.

He had never felt low, so pathetic, like the worst friend in the whole world - and then Benedict reached out and grabbed his hand.

"Colin, listen to me; this is not your fault." he intoned.

"It is-"

"No it's not. Cavender is the scum of the earth. He's the one who's inflicted his harassment on her, he's the one who battered her over the head; that is not on you." he insisted. "I remember him when I was still here and he's always treated girls horribly. I'm surprised he hasn't done something on this scale before to get himself expelled. I even remember when Sophie and I started dating, I caught him eyeballing us on several occasions, but now in retrospect he must have been zeroing in on Sophie. As much as it hurts to think about, I reckon he's had her in his sights for quite some time and was waiting for any opportunity to swoop in. He might have thought if we had broken up then she would have been easy for him." he shuddered.

"But if I hadn't told him I didn't know,"

"No, Col. You could have told him to get lost then and there; but does Cavender seem like the type to take no for an answer? It wouldn't have mattered if you had told him no or told him you didn't know; he was going to go after her no matter what. So please; don't you dare blame yourself for this. He's the only person I blame for this." Benedict swallowed as he sadly looked over to Sophie.

Colin nodded, accepting that Cavender was a nasty piece of work and knowing if the roles were reversed he wouldn't let Benedict or anyone else blame themselves for the awful actions of a reprehensible monster.

"But I am sorry for how I've treated you guys." Colin said, needing to make his apology known while he had the chance. "I have been such a dick towards you two when you didn't deserve it."

Benedict stewed on his brother's apology for a beat, rubbing his thumb against the back of Sophie's hand as he watched her pensively.

"Can I ask why you were so rattled by us being together? Do you think we're not going to work out or is it feeling like a third wheel,"

"I don't even know." Colin shook his head. "I was just shell-shocked when I found out you were together. I just never once thought you two might ever get together or considered anything of the sort, so it just threw me through a loop. I didn't know how to process it. Then I guess there was a bit of jealousy that you stole my best friend from me... but I was just being an immature brat, I know that now. I just clung onto that petty resentment even when everyone else was telling me to get a grip and chill out."

"Well, I am sorry for upsetting you." Benedict said sincerely. "If you felt betrayed we didn't tell you first, or even admit to you that we had feelings for each other before we got together. Maybe it might have been better if we had."

"It might have done... but I honestly think I was just... just being a child about it all." Colin admitted with a sigh. "Because when you two got together we came back to school and the dynamic changed. You two were always together, you were always tagging along with us, and then Phillip started going out with Lucy, and then Michael started dating anyone and everyone; and suddenly we were less of a friendship group doing everything together and everyone was doing what they wanted to do... except me."

"But you've dated people too." Benedict noted.

"Yeah but only because everyone else was so I thought I might as well. But all I wanted to do was hang out just the four of us, like it had always been... I think I was basically too scared of growing up and falling behind, and I think I placed that blame on you and Sophie because if you hadn't got together... I don't know, maybe we'd still be the Awesome Foursome and doing everything as a group, but that was unfair of me to view it like that. And besides, changes are going to happen no matter what, that's life I know... I've just got to deal with it better."

"It's okay, you know. To be scared by change. It's perfectly natural." Benedict told him, his tone as kind and brotherly as it had always been whenever he had given him advice. "Just talk it out. Whether that's with mum and dad, or your friends, or me; we're always going to be here for you whenever you get scared. You know that, right?"

Colin nodded and shot him a small smile. "Thank you."

"Any time." Benedict smiled back, relieved that they had at long last talked things out.

For several minutes they silently revelled in the progress they had made in rebuilding their relationship after nearly two years of the unspoken divide that had grown between them, both of them glad that they were united and had someone to lean on as Sophie rested between them.

"Um, did Sophie mention to you that us lot were thinking of travelling after we've graduated?" Colin gingerly asked.

"Yeah, she mentioned it." Benedict nodded.

"Did... did you want to come with us?"

Benedict clearly hadn't been expecting the question as his head snapped towards his brother and his brows sprung up.

"Wait, really?"

"I knew Sophie had been hesitant when we were talking about it, and I know she must have been weighing up her options figuring she couldn't ask if you could come to keep the peace; but it would be stupid of me to want to exclude you."

"I wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable-"

"You wouldn't." Colin shook his head. "Truly you wouldn't. I might have been a dickhead and in denial for the longest time; but you make Sophie happy and she makes you happy. You've both been happier than I've ever known you ever since you've been together, and I don't understand why I tried to stand in the way of that - man, I've been such a dick." he huffed with vexed mortification of himself. "I love you both so much and all I want is for you both to be truly loved and utterly happy; and you're the happiest when you're together. So please come with us. It would mean the world to Sophie."

A soft smile broke out on Benedict's face and he nodded. "I'd be honoured - just don't get expect me to pick you up and take care of you when you're getting shit-faced."

"That's fine - but you've got to keep it down in the bedroom; I don't want to hear any of that for the sake of our relationship."

"Deal." Benedict chuckled.

Colin went to make another joke when their attention was stolen by the groaning from the bed - Sophie was stirring.

"Sophie." Benedict gasped and jumped to his feet, clutching her hand closer. "Sophie, are you okay?"

The groaning turned into a pained hiss and Sophie struggled to open her eyes properly.

"It hurts." she whimpered.

Without being asked Colin immediately ran off to grab the matron, leaving Benedict to reassure Sophie, gentle soothing her through the pain that must be affecting her head. When the matron accompanied Colin back to the bed she delicately explained to Sophie her injuries and told her she needed another dose of the potions that had already been administered, but warned her they had horrible tastes and would cause her some unease for a few minutes before the painkillers kicked in. Like a trooper, Sophie endured the medicines but as she settled again she winced in agony as the elixirs worked their magic.

"Squeeze my hand, Soph. As tight are you want." Benedict told her and rested his free hand on her shoulder to let her know he wasn't going anywhere.

"Same here." Colin added.

"Colin?" she wheezed. "You're here too?"

"Course I am. And the matron's gone to get everyone else. We've been so worried about you."

"But I'm going to be okay." she whimpered, half trying to comfort him, half uncertain that she would.

"You're going to make a full recovery, sweetheart. It just might hurt for a while longer." Benedict assured her and rubbed at her shoulder.

"Okay." she swallowed with a timid nod.

"Just think good thoughts, Soph. Look forward to all the chocolate we're going to get you to eat for your stay here." Colin said and smiled as soon as his mental image prompted a smile from her. "And you can also look forward to our interrailing trip. Ben's going to come with us, and we're going to have the best time, I promise you."

"Really?" she looked from him to Benedict. "You're coming too?"

"Colin invited me." Benedict told her encouragingly. "I wouldn't pass it up for the world."

"Oh I'm so glad." Sophie smiled, though winced again from the pain of the Skele-Gro affecting her skull.

"Take it easy, Soph."

"Well then, stop making me smile about what I've got to look forward to." she teased back, though it was then followed up by an involuntary cry as the potions continued burning their way through her system.

"It's okay, Soph. It's okay." Benedict tried assuring her, though Colin could see how awful it was for his brother to watch his girlfriend writhing in agony.

"I hate feeling weak." she croaked out.

"That's the last thing you are." Colin stated. "You're the bravest, strongest person I've ever met. So don't you dare think so lowly of yourself."

"Okay." she whined and when another wave of pain went through her she dropped a hold of Colin's hand and instead gripped Benedict's hand between both of hers. "Oh, Ben..."

"I'm right here, baby. I'm going to stay right by your side, okay? I'm not going anywhere."

Colin looked to his brother and in that moment he saw for himself just how utterly devoted and in love he was with Sophie; and after everything she had endured in life, that's all Colin ever wanted for her, and at long last he fully accepted that she and Benedict were meant for each other and that there could be no one else who could love her better than his brother could.

Knowing Sophie well enough, Colin knew she'd much prefer to not let anyone else see her like this because as much as she hated feeling weak, she hated being viewed as weak even more. He told Sophie he'd preempt the arrival of the others and get them to wait outside the hospital wing until she was ready for visitors, which she was gratefully relieved to hear. He gave her shoulder a reassuring rub and then made his way to the doors of the infirmary, but before he left he took one last look at Benedict comforting Sophie through her affliction, watching for a beat as his brother continued to soothe her as best as he could. Safe in the knowledge that his best friend was being cared after by the person who loved her most, Colin let out a sigh of relief and exited the room.

[alister312]

i'd like to hear your romantic hcs for gregstophe!

i feel like i got an ask about this similar topic once before but i am always delighted to answer nonetheless so!! thank you anon 🥰 here’s a few i personally like a lot:

pet names!! once they start dating i do very much see them as both being big pet name people. for Gregory I think it comes naturally since i feel british people are often portrayed as calling people by a pet name (dear, love, etc.), so maybe he’d even occasionally use them for Christophe before they date. after, though, he certainly turns up the affection every time he uses them. Christophe takes a bit more time, but once he starts, it’s constant.

sort of along the lines of pet names, I think they use French when they want to be extra romantic! the same way some extra lovey-dovey couples will do babytalk with one another, i think Gregory and Christophe would speak in French. they ofc use it for normal everyday talk too sometimes, but if they want to lovingly tease the other or excessively compliment/gush about each other, they’d switch over to French.

LETTERS– this is one of my FAVORITE headcanons about them, the idea that they write to each other a lot. I oscillate on whether or not I like the idea of them growing up together or meeting briefly as kids but staying in touch as they get older… ofc letter writing works more for the latter. Gregory would be on point with his letter-writing game: perfectly neat handwriting, sturdy ideal letter paper, very crisp pristine envelopes. Christophe, on the other hand, would be the kinda guy who cuts off the front of a Kraft mac n cheese box, sticks a stamp on it, and calls it a postcard. he still writes just as meaningful and romantic things as Gregory does and honestly Gregory loves the kitsch of it (he saves every one ofc) so it all works out.

no matter what profession they end up having, i think both of them are prone to getting stressed and overworking, so they start giving one another massages whenever it gets really bad. sometimes it’s a light, surface level thing, like if Gregory’s shoulders are all hunched up and Christophe goes over and rubs them with his hands to get him to relax. it can also be more in-depth, like if Christophe’s whole body is sore from digging so Gregory has him lie on the couch and he really works him with his elbows. I don’t think either of them are certified masseurs or have any training at all, but they know one another well enough that they can give fantastic massages.

I think whenever they bought their first piece of furniture as a couple (probably a bed frame and corresponding mattress), Christophe carved their initials into the wood of it. Gregory was absolutely NOT thrilled about this at first, but Christophe was like “But it’s the first thing that’s ours, we should mark it”. Gregory was still miffed about the vandalism, but he eventually got very attached to the idea of the carving as an important memento of their relationship

[picnokinesis]

Taka!! Hello!! I saw you have watched Wolf and I’m curious about your thoughts on it ?! I loved it so much tbh, cause I started watching it for Sacha but I ended up finding the plot and the rest of the characters rly compelling too :D

SKSKSK harsh cut to footage of me specifically reblogging wolf posts from your blog to coax you into my askbox as an internet version of Molina's homemade deer trap -

BUT YES HELLO oh my days it was so much fun, right? I also definitely started watching it for sacha, and - okay well, let's put all the spoilers under the cut

SKSKS so. Came for Sacha. Stayed for Sacha.......and then watched the last 30 minutes because I wanted to know the answers (SKSK BUT ALSO his...CORPSE was on the floor in all the important scenes so y'know! He was still there in spirit)

But MAN wow did sacha and iwan steal the show, right?? They were absolutely AMAZING! Absolutely killing it, made me crack up multiple times they were just...literally the best duo. And man the twist at the end of episode five just GRABBED ME because wow, I really should have seen it coming and it was the best kind of twist where it suddenly made everything Molina had been doing make sense. And like - man, I'm just in awe of Sacha's acting, yknow? The guy acted his SOCKS off in this, like right from the first episode, you know that scene where they reveal that he is. not in fact a police officer SKKSKS but it's like the spyfall reveal, right? the mask drop. only, unlike in spyfall, this isn't sudden - it's a slow ramp-up of something being very wrong with this guy, gradually becoming more and more unhinged, and Sacha just NAILED it. Absolutely phenomenal. And then the way they just added so much DEPTH to his character augh, I wanted him to get out of the whole thing SO BAD even though I knew it was super unlikely. But augh by episode 5 he was SO nervous and paranoid, and then he just spent the first half of episode 6 just.....so palpably terrified?? Augh. Love him. So sad he got stabbed in the neck rip but he made up for it by having the most incredible dialogue with molina for five episodes straight skskks (i'm still losing it over 'you're not going to shower?? ....you handled intenstines today' SKSKSKSK like. ok real talk when I first saw the trailer for wolf I immediately came up with au6, yet another campervan au, which I will probably do not much with but SKSKKS the vibes were there in the series and it was a DELIGHT)

With regards to the rest of the story, it was super interesting, right? I feel like you possibly enjoyed it slightly more than I did (I was like. semi-frequently getting extremely annoyed at the random sexual content that seemed wildly tonally dissonant 80% of the time - I was SO SALTY that Sacha's opera lipsynch of our dreams with a SWORD was intercut with. that. and then also Jack's tendency to just like. physically assault people as a method of questioning like BOY that is. that is a CRIME sir. I know you're desperate for justice but do not boyo. But that's kind of a recurring pet peeve I have with crime shows as a rule sksksk). That said though - I did REALLY love Jack, and guh the stuff with his neighbour was SO creepy (LIKE THOSE WEREN'T NIGHTMARES??? HELLO???????) and maaaaaaaaan the stuff with the donkey pitch was so messed up and creepy. It was really good though. I did feel a bit like...'eh' on the end reveal about who the Donkey Pitch murderers were - that was probably in part because Honey had just died RIP but also hmmm idk, like obviously Molina was one of them, but I feel like I kinda wanted more on who Molina actually WAS, other than just some person Lucia knew from when she was in psychiatric care? Like my running theory the whole time had been that he was actually Theo, Hugo's older brother, simply because he looked a heck of a lot like Hugo skksks and it had just been an interesting throw-away line from Hugo's dad that didn't really go anywhere. I think also the twist with Lucia rang a bit hollow to me simply because the twist with Molina had been SO satisfying because it made all these little weird things make sense and I felt like I SHOULD have known (especially after honey and matilda's scene where they talk about letting people think they're more stupid than they are), but with Lucia (at least, for me personally) it felt a bit more out of the blue. But it was good, don't get me wrong - the stuff with her, hugo and sophie made a lot of sense and maaaaaaaaan that was so dark. And then I REALLY loved the ending for Jack, like the decision to not reveal what actually happened at the donkey pitch, and him finding out that stuff about his brother and then burning the treehouse and FINALLY getting some control back over the whole thing.........BUT THEN INTERCUT WITH THE REVEAL THAT HIS BROTHER HAD BEEN ALIVE?????? LIKE????????? AHHH??? That was SO well done.

Anyway. Show good. I enjoyed. There was actually a lot of things narratively and thematically that I particularly enjoyed - like even though the two storylines felt quite disparate at times, there were so many things connecting them or echoing between them! Off the top of my head, it's things like the idea of people being in your house and doing stuff when you're asleep - like with Penderecki but also how Molina and Lucia did that too with Sophie and Hugo. And then how like, Matilda tries to break that bathroom mirror to escape, and then Jack and Lincoln are escaping in a, uh. Different way and they DO break a bathroom mirror. Stuff like that. There were definitely more than that but I can't remember them right now, but it was like....idk the way that they echoed between each other gave it an internal resonance which made it very satisfying to watch (and is actually the same technique I've tried to use in campervan part 6, which is possibly why it appealed to me so much!). I also really liked the repeated use of mirrors and mirror shots - I feel like that was trying to say something too but I haven't quite untangled it yet. But yeah! Fun times.

[safyresky]

Seeing as Jack's childhood is my Roman Empire, apparently, and piggybacking off our convo the other night about the icy tree, I'd love to hear some anecdotes from when Jack was a kiddo! I think about him jumping off the roof in an attempt to fly, like, every other day (and have even attempted to comic it), lmao. Plus young parents!Blinter have my whole heart. 😍😍😍

And I think about the anecdote from The Forgiven with the bird freezing probably JUST as much!

THANK YOU for diving into the ask box with distractions!! My day got even MORE a day (derogatory) in the HOUR I was home for before heading back out so this is appreciated!

Allow me to oblige you with some fun facts and the like from CS Jack's childhood lol

Icy tree: Winter made it for him to show him he could do lovely things with ice after yet another lament (bc we all be KNOW this guy laments) and kick started his artistic prowess

Winter's mantra was "when the season gives you dead citrus, chuck it at those who piss you off :)" and she 100% taught this to Jack

(Who later goes sure I could chuck dead citrus at annoying people. But what if. What if I threw a CHILD at them)

(Jacqueline, tiny, cackling, and ready to be launched: >:D)

I gotta write the flying off the roof thing lmao. It's funny bc it's when Winter teaches him how to defy gravity and it's done in the funniest way. My god. I should write it

young parents!Blinter were wildin lmao. They brought Jack to work with them quite frequently when he wasn't getting in trouble at school and y'know. doing shenanigans. he was a very amusing child and brought them endless hours of delight while on the job bc he did not gaf. He'd speak his mind whenever.

this one time Jack was at City Hall with Blaise and overherad one of the other governors planning a coup

he sat in and asked all about the coup and got the details of the plan, went back to Blaise and told him EVERYTHING

opened that one with "hey dad? what's a coup?"

One of Blaise's top ten days at work, to this day

Jack would sweet talk ANYONE to get a lil extra stuff while out and about with Winter lmao. The OG Market Day grouping!!! He was (and still is) a damn good schmoozer and Winter was always like "how far can this go".

You know that reel you sent me with the kid bargaining with the Dunkin' Donuts worker and coming back with more and more doughnuts? That's Jack

When Jacqueline was born, he was throwing down in the hospital with Spring

She INSISTED on being there and Winter went "absolutely fucking not" so Blinter, being the gr8 parents they are, went "you know what Jack would love. keeping Spring OUT" and they were right

(Spring thought she could manage to be there when the Twins came around but Jacqueline learned from the best and it SHOWED)

When Jack was born Blaise pulled double duty (support wifey, the love of his life, AND fight off SIL who worries too much) until Summer and Autumn intervened

This was on the day they had their wedding party so please picture the seasons and blaise in full wedding regalia. the whole nine yards. fancy dresses and suits and roach killer shoes. Spring deffs had a very froufrou hat

The people at the mat ward at CSG were like "if another Frost kid comes along it'll be too soon"

SHIFTING BACK TO FOCUS MODE

Blinter did their BEST before Jack hit two-thousand to curb his bad habits in healthy ways, which worked about 50% of the time

"What they don't know can't hurt them" Jack thought by the time he was 1700

He was dead wrong. They knew everything. He had no idea how. He still doesn't tbh. And they still seemingly know everything

ANYWAY they were pretty good at distracting him MOST days. It got harder the older they got and the older he got and when Santa started his whole thing it was all downhill from there baby

They both thought Jack would be GREAT at teaching Jacqueline. They did NOT just let him bc they'd hoped it would curb his bad streak. They hoped it WOULD, but they also genuinely saw how much he enjoyed it and went "oh good! another way to offset his energy into healthier things!"

Jack was the kinda kid that was like I WANT TO LEARN E V E R Y T H I N G

Blaise, coming from the royalty background of being forced to learn everything even if you didn't want to, was very supportive of Jack learning things he WANTED to learn and did his best to meet that need

They clashed a lot tho bc Jack was very not patient and patience goes a long way in learning a new skill

This is the first thing Jack learns ever lol

Blaise taught him the warlock stuff!! He was very hesitant to teach it all bc of his own experiences, and Jack was, of course, impatient lol.

Jack was also exceptionally good at picking stuff up just by watching. He soaked up concepts like a SPONGE as a kid

Teaching Jacqueline was like, challenge mode bc she was very hyperactive and couldn't sit still and extra goofy which made for a lot of long nights of a simple concept being like, drawn out for way too long

Oodles of fun tho, he loved how silly and goofy this gremlin of a sibling was (still does)

Was one of those kids. Who says like weirdly wise things that are also slightly spooky. Older castors would be enthralled with this random 12 year old about philosophical matters and questions beyond their understanding of the universe that they discussed to death

you know. the weird shit kids say that make you go UM ARE YOU OKAY? ARE YOU HAUNTED MAYBE? BY GHOSTS? IS IT GHOSTS?

When Jack was born Blaise was 100% the Dad who carried the baby around in a lil. Baby carrier thing on his chest all the time. Endless hours of delight when 3 and 4 came around and people would see Fino on his chest like CUTE BABY and he'd whip around and OH MY GOD THERE'S A SECOND ONE as Fiera looked at them like >:)

Okay this post is starting to LAG so that's all I've got for you for now, lol. Ty for the distraction and I hope you enjoyed these crystal springs FACTS: Jack's childhood edition ft. young blinter and baby sibs every so often ;)

[whatisalifeihaveablog]

Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks...

Ooh I don't mind at all but also this is a very hard question 🤣 I'll make a caveat that this top 10 is not necessarily in order and is subject to change but I love any opportunity to talk about my faves <3. Think of it as list of characters that I love more than a proper top 10

Yuki Sohma (Fruits Basket) - Gotta start with the guy that's been my icon on here for several years now. I read the Fruits Basket manga when I was in 7th grade and I resonated so hard with Yuki's internal struggles. I've always said our life circumstances are very different but our anxieties and personal difficulties are so similar and I had never encountered a character I related to so hard before so I latched on and have not let go to this day

Shigeo Kageyama (Mob Psycho 100) - I'm currently rewatching this series and keep thinking about how if it had come out when I was younger I would have probably latched on to Mob just as much as I did Yuki for how relatable he can be lmao. As an adult I watch it and really root for this kid and feel genuinely proud in every moment of growth he experiences.

Yusuke Urameshi (Yu Yu Hakusho) - A character I was younger than the first time I watched the anime and am currently significantly older than and he has become my anime son. I adore this boy in all of his asshole tough guy posturing and his wit and genuine care for his friends and determination and just all of it. I also want to wrap him in a blanket and give him some delicious hot soup.

Lelouch Lamperouge (Code Geass) - One thing about me is if a character is pretty and cunning and deadly intelligent and morally grey, they are likely going to be a favorite and Lelouch was an early example of this for me. Code Geass is one of my favorite animes I've ever watched and watching Lelouch scheme and generally be him is so damn delightful every time. He's a character I feel like I could write an entire dissertation on, I honestly could with any of these characters, but I am trying to avoid that for the sake of the length of this post lmao

Wei Wuxian (Mdzs/The Untamed) - How did it take me this long to talk about mdzs? Wei Wuxian is absolutely amazing to watch or read about in every single scene. Complicated and brilliant and cocky and so very tragic. He's another one who hits a LOT of points on the "Who is gonna be Sarah's next favorite character" bingo card. I've scarcely cried for a character as much as I've cried for Wei Wuxian, he is so dear to my heart.

Chuuya Nakahara (Bungo Stray Dogs) - What can I say? I love an angry boy. I'll be honest, a lot of my initial love for Chuuya was aesthetics. His hair and outfit alone had me primed to love him from the start but then he came in with that cocky/angry attitude and honestly fucking sick power and that solidified it lmao. And then the more I learned about him beyond the aesthetics and immediate impressions the more I loved him.

Jiang Cheng (Mdzs/The Untamed) - Definitely gotta mention my favorite angry boy of all my angry boys <3. This man has so many flaws and I honestly do get why it's hard for some people to like him but man I love him so much. His temper, to me, is just another side of his passion which also extends into his ambition and love and he rebuilt his clan from nothing and I'm definitely a person who even when it comes to his more "wrong" decisions/actions I think they're more understandable than the people who hate him say. I feel a strong need to defend him a lot of the time

Monkey D. Luffy (One Piece) - Nothing but respect for my pirate king!!!! Luffy is such a fun character. Like truly one of my favorite shonen protags of all time and that mostly comes down to how hard he makes me smile while reading just constantly. Everything he says and everything he does is so wildly entertaining while also being so earnest and honest and simultaneously laid back. The way he loves his crew and puts everything he has into being their captain. I love him so much lol

Wen Kexing (Word of Honor) - Pretty, cunning, morally grey, do I need to say more? His totally shameless attitude in the beginning was so funny all the time and then the deeper we got into his character the more he went from being the most entertaining person on screen to, well still that, but also a character I feel so many emotions for all the time.

Alphonse Elric (Fullmetal Alchemist) - Now here's some top tier anime son material. My love for Al has only ever grown with the years and subsequent rewatches of this series. I. Love. This. Boy. He has seen and been through too much and is still so good and loving and steadfast in his goals and values. Literally couldn't find a better boy. 10/10

[alyosiuscreightonward]

“I’m just having a bad day,” he said to the young boy who heard the crack of on the verge of tears in his voice.

“Okay, I’ll shut up,” replied the young boy who stepped back and watched the older man open the office door.

Maybe the young boy finally got it this time around. He saw the older man sit down and stare at the computer screen and growl at the inanimate object.

The older man was sitting in the high back chair, typing, counting, scribbling and clicking blindly as the young boy was sitting next to him and staring at his phone scrolling through some stupid app. The older man was also thinking, “Does this guy have a fucking clue? I’M HAVING A HORRIBLE DAY,” the old man was saying to himself as he was doing his best to ignore the boy who was still scrolling through his phone and said something about (not really sure) that he just wanted to have a conversation. Ugh.

The young boy probably had absolutely no idea what he was witnessing just a couple of feet away from him. Old man is in the middle of a manic phase. The constant spinning of the overthinking dodecahedron is nearly a blur, but the old man just kept working and making sure that the end of day was being completed.

“What had happened was a person,” said the disconnected voice of Brooklynite/New Yorican Rosie Perez who was recounting her experience of driving an Isuzu Trooper. The old man knew that what happened was a person came into his life. He told the person that he had feelings for him and he also told the other man that he was risking his friendship by telling him that he had feelings.

For more than twenty years the old man hid his own feelings. During these years, the old man had exiled himself after his last encounter with another man. The other man told him that he was having feelings for him.

“Dude. I’m not here for this. I’m here for the sex as I’ve just gotten out of a bad relationship,” the old man told him. The other man just sat there mouth agape and a moment later the old man bent over to kiss him goodbye. He placed both hands on either side of his face, kissed him full on and said, “I’d invite you but I’m afraid you’d have accepted.” He straightened up and walked out.

The world kept spinning on its axis as for the old man it stopped with a jerk and he got out.

The young boy knew nothing of the old man’s mental health issues.

The plethora of failed attempts to find a connection between himself and another person was jousting in the middle of a perfect storm.

From having his dream snatched away and then summarily squashed like a bug as the thirteen year old boy was trying to parse the fact that he had been raped only a month earlier as he was thrown into the cesspool of 1974’s Times Square. Porn theaters everywhere.

The old man is a survivor. He was on track to be a great ballet dancer and then became a homeless junkie prostitute who was a thief and a shitkicker who wanted to be infamous and get to the point in his life where he understood fully that he had everything you wanted or needed but he didn’t have an iota of talent. Hack.

The old man had been writing for years and still couldn’t figure out if was a dangling participle or just a dangling obscene pickle.

Years of addiction have taken their toll on the old man who just kept marching along. Yesterday, the manic state is in full swing. Yet he still goes to work and gets it done meanwhile holding back tears. Today is a different story. Yet the feeble foolish old man continues to scribble.

The young boy is oblivious. He like the old man’s husband, a Gemini, who is charming and delightful and comes across as an irritant with, “Enough about me. Let’s talk about you. What do you think about me?”

The old man is a secretive person who knows how to control himself and as a Scorpion, he can only go thermonuclear and will never stop loving you as he decides to leave you bleeding or nurse you back to health.

Then the Sagittarius enters the picture. This is where it all begins to happen and he’s in a different universe now. The Scorpion are compatible with the Gemini and the Sagittarius. The old man knows that they are not the ones. He’s an empath and he can feel their energy. With his hands he knows that has to keep his distance from them. Yet he lets his guard down and makes a judgment in error.

The old man tugs on the hem of his untucked shirt, taking a deep breath and puts on his blinders as did Sisyphus.

On two separate blogs elsewhere on the interwebs, we are going to see how mental health issues are right there in black and white. It’s a roller coaster of emotions. We can see that the old man knows and understands how to cope. He that he has to go home, go to sleep and wake up, get out of bed unassisted and start a new day.

The chalkboard has been wiped clean. The sun is shining, the birds are singing and the perfect day for a light wrap. Something like a shrug, a chubby or a well-worn schmatta that’s ready for rag pile.

Twenty minutes later, the end of day is done. The two men exit the building. By this time, whatever happened was squashed and they were gathering up their belongings and going their separate ways.

Out in the parking lot, in corner was the old man’s sedan and the boy had his mom’s minivan. As they stood there for a moment, they bantered about for a few minutes before getting in the car and going home.

“Look here, Seven,” the old man says with smirk, “I can insult you without you knowing it.”

“Like what would you say,” the boy asks.

“Seven,” he starts with an arched eyebrow, “As a Squalmulous Laggard, one step above a guttersnipe, you deign to present yourself wearing your tatterdemalion haute couture that were tossed out of the bin lorry that was engulfed in flames, you’ll never meet the man who’s name is on the label because you haven’t heard of style though the Emperor’s new clothes would look better on you and still I’d vomit.”

“K.I.S.S.M.E., you twat,” said the disconnected voice of an L.A. based photographer. “You’re not Norman Mailer. For Christ’s sake, old man. No one is going to read this and get it even if you wrote ‘Kilroy was here’ on the subway walls.”

Translation: “Seven. You’re still a child. Even though your clothes have New York, London and Paris stitched on them, they look like you got them out of a donation box at an abandoned gas station.”

Seven laughed and shrugged his shoulders as he didn’t know what the old man had said.

The feeble old man who is in his mid sixties knows that the young man, who is possibly seventeen or eighteen, is smarter than he is and would never use such flowery language since he uses Snapchat and the feeble old man barely knows how to use TikTok other than to scroll through it.

“Seven, understand this: I’m in the middle of a manic phase right now,” he said with a clenched jaw. “I’m not going to try to make you feel my pain or anything else. When I say that I’m having a bad day, say something like, ‘I’m sorry and I hope you feel better soon,’ and then you get the fuck away from me so I can wallow.”

The feeble old man flicked his wrist leaving the young man standing there in the parking lot and staring at him. The old man walked away from him. Got in his car, turned the engine over, then drove off.

An hour later, the old man was home. He had to micturate like a 20 handed equine. As he was letting go, for the umpteenth time he read the little sign next to the toilet that says, “You are worth more than you know, capable of more than you think and loved more than you can imagine.”

As he stood there, he rolled his eyes out loud and to his surprise America’s favorite appeared and said, as he always does, “If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else? Can I get an AMEN up in here?!”

The old man scoffed. He had finished and zipped up his pants and proceeded to walk to his recliner muttering to himself, “I’ve been in therapy since I was eight years old and I’m going to sixty five, and only now have I learned to take care of myself yet extricating myself from the Karpman Triangle is a journey. A series of tollbooths and no exits, but God Dammit to HELL, I’m gonna make my own fucking exit and be happy!!”

[clowncalvary]

Reviewing Every Animal Crossing New Horizons Villager (Because I Have Fallen Down The Rabbit Hole) Part 3

Bruce: Oh? Bam's cooler older brother? For that he gets a pass. 350 Bells.

Bubbles: Nope. No one is topping Biff apparently. 10 Bells.

Buck: Why is this horse covered in puke? Who did this to him? 0 Bells.

Bud: We could have had a cute lion, but you chose an ugly color pattern with a soul patch. 0 Bells.

Bunnie: Kind of spooky looking, but in a cute way? I can not describe that while I like them, I do not want them on my island? 300 Bells.

Butch: I assume that there are no cool looking dogs in this game, just real dogs being dogs. I am going to throw a tennis ball for this one, kind of my fave so far. 300 Bells.

Buzz: U G L Y. 0 Bells.

Cally: I'm going to have to start making Trash Tier its own thing because this is getting ridiculous, I honestly thought I would enjoy more of these than I am :( 0 Bells.

Camofrog: 0 Bells. I'm from the midwest, I do not have to explain.

Canberra: Oh? Even more ugly? Hate this dude. 0 Bells.

Candi: I AM WEEPING, WHY DO THEY JUST KEEP MAKING THEM WORSE?! YOU LOOK AT THIS MOUSE AND TELL ME THERE IS A GOD!! -500 Bells.

Carmen: Old Betty Boop cartoon ripped straight into animal crossing. 10 Bells.

Caroline: The savior of the squirrels has arrived :0 This design is so charming with the color mix and the cute expression! 500 Bells.

Carrie: This is a kangaroo with eyeshadow. No, seriously, what person risked their life to put makeup on a wild animal? 10 Bells.

Cashmere: ._. This is a sheep? Not a frog wearing a wig? 0 Bells.

Celia: Stop. Making. Eagles. You. Can. Not. Make. Me. Like. Them!!!! 0 Bells.

Cephalobot: Okay, I giggled, I do love a good smug robot. He is going right up there with Hal (Homestuck, not 2001) 400 Bells.

Cesar: Either put him down or put me down. I do not want to live in a town where this guy exists too. -500 Bells.

Chabwick: Not too bad! Pretty cute, but also very plain. 200 Bells.

Chadder: sigh What do you want me to say? It's another ugly mouse villager and I am distressed about it. 0 Bells.

Chai: Mmhm. 0 Bells.

Charlise: Bad Bear. Like, why did we make the bear this kind of green and give them bad hair? Be ashamed of yourselves. 0 Bells.

Chelsea: I imagine that this is what the embodiment of spring is supposed to look like. Absolutely darling I would not mind following her into the forest and having a picnic! 1236 Bells!

Cheri: I really want to hate her, but I can't even find it in myself to do so. She isn't terrible and that is something that I am just going to have to accept! 50 Bells.

Cherry: YES! Now THIS is what I was talking about with the dog villagers! She is a delight and she is rocking it! I am loving getting to see her! Would not be upset if she ended up on my island later! 700 Bells.

Chester: Panda? I think? Either way, much like the actual animal I am not that fond of him. 10 Bells.

Chevre: She looks like a lil eldritch goat and I really like her vibes :0 As long as I don't wake up with her standing over in me in the night then she is good in my book! 600 Bells.

Chief: This wolf is gay. You can not change my mind. I love this lil gay wolf that looks like he should be at the country club. Him and Tom Nook go golfing, you know they do! 400 Bells.

Chops: He looks like he should be royalty in France. This is not a good thing, and in fact it is making me itch for a certain decapitating device…. 10 Bells.

Chow: Oh! An ugly Panda! 0 Bells.

[reservoirreputation]

My Journey to Brain-rot, or It Took Me Three Views to “Get” Reservoir Dogs.

Similar to my main blog, where I described my tale as a Supernatural fan, first casual then wanting something more, something a lot gayer, only to be delighted that the answer’s been under my nose the whole time. Very similar story.

I’m going to recap from memory my first three viewings of the 1992 classic. So:

1st viewing: I was probably 12. Pretty sure I’d rented it from Blockbuster. Yes, this was in the 2000’s, no, I don’t expect you to believe me. Not the watching violent movies at twelve part, but the whole “you know what a Blockbuster is?” Point being, I really liked Kill Bill, and figured this would be no different. Problem is, I’m terrible with names. Like, can’t name a relative of mine if we’re not that close, even if Mom’s told me five minutes ago. How do you think I fared with a movie of white guys dressed the same way with similar dialogue? Not well, and I wasn’t impressed. Promptly forgot about the movie, its plot, its characters, its twist, all of it.

In the years that followed, and having enjoyed the likes of Pulp Fiction and Inglorious Bastards, I decide, at about 17? I wanna say? to give Reservoir Dogs another shot. 

2nd viewing: It’s like my mind’s been wiped, have no recollection of this fucking film. Had zero expectations, but there was one important difference at this time, and where it crosses over with my experience with Supernatural: I’d been craving some gay shit. That good ol’ MLM. Only at this point, I had zero tools in my media literacy belt, and had to go by gut feeling. You know, when you watch or read something, and you get that funny feeling in your gut that it’s really quite queer, and you’re not instantly sure if you’re into it. That was me when I saw Tim Roth screaming his head off and the older guy holding his hand, comforting him. Literally nothing else in the movie held my interest the way these two’s bullshit did. Every moment they weren’t on screen being the definition of hurt/comfort was like losing the heart of the story.

Too long later, to March of this year, at 25 years old. I see someone who’s movie reactions I like has also reacted to this film, and I instantly think ‘oh yeah, the one where those two characters are really homoerotic’. Watch this 40 minute reaction, and am stunned at how it’s not only still really fucking gay, but queerer than I remembered. Late at night, done with the video, and I’m like “I need to rewatch this movie now.”

3rd viewing: glued to my seat, absolutely enthralled with this fucking movie. The brain-rot has properly set in. This is my life now. I wonder how more people don’t talk about this movie as the queer masterpiece that it is. I’m cursed with the sight, and cannot express what haunts me. A week later, I realize, to both my delight and horror, that Supernatural has done an episode of this in season 12. I mean, straight up, a Tarantino tribute to specifically Reservoir Dogs, that’s also known as one of the best Destiel episodes of the series, and blatantly foreshadows characters betraying their love interest in the season finale. Listen, I didn’t start writing SPN meta until season 13, I never even considered that the source material was equally as gay. Just, this revelation both fascinated and confounded me, but provided me with another comfort; I’m not alone in recognizing how ridiculously queer this movie is, and that professional writers got paid to make what amounts to crossover fanfiction.

So, to go from being unimpressed at 12 to obsessed at 25. God, I love movies.

Reservoir Dogs is truly one of those movies that is more rewarding the more you watch it. Makes me wish there were more videos of people online rewatching movies with a twist, or to be able to take a deeper dive into a story and not be lost from trying to absorb all the details and characters and plot-points for the first time.

That's it. Now I'm stuck here with maybe a dozen fanfic plots in my noggin. I shall never know peace.