#there’s hints later on but the actual reveal is kinda weak like it basically happens off screen? which sucks

[kalmeria]

so I know basically no one follows me for ensemble stars BUT! i think tumblr ppl could appreciate if i told them about how there’s two characters who meet for the first time and they feel some kind of connection immediately, like “have we met before?” and then later it turns out they used to be mutuals

[kay-diggle]

The Promise Ring

Summary: Some promises are broken, some promises remain intact, and new promises are made.

Pairing: Jungkook x Female Reader

Genre & Rating: Angst, Smut, Hint of Fluff, 18+

Warnings: oral (m. recieving), somewhat dom!jungkook (he’s actually a big softie) sub!reader, hairpulling, mentions of jealousy, overstimulation, vaginal intercourse, unprotected sex (pls pls pls stay safe guys!)

Length: 4.2k

Notes: I apologize that the first fic I post in months is so terrible (it highkey feels like it’s all over the place but that’s okay!) If you somehow enjoy this... please let me know! I’m still kinda in hiatus bc of school btw :( {Requests are closed}

Kay-Diggle’s Ultimate Masterlist

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Before 

“It’s so pretty out here tonight,” you commented on the beautiful scenery in front of you. You were laid across your boyfriend’s lap while he leaned back, both taking in the view. 

 For your four year anniversary, Jungkook took you out to a clearing that overlooks the city. You had a late night picnic, eating your favorite foods while sharing some of your favorite memories from the past four years you’ve been together. 

“Yea… but you’re prettier.” 

“Ugh, corrrnnyyyy,” you whined despite feeling yourself begin to blush. 

“Yea, but you love it,” he placed a sweet kiss on your forehead. “And I think this is the perfect time to give you your anniversary gift babe!” 

“No! I definitely told you I did not want a gift this year.” 

“Well that is definitely too bad because I got you one anyways,” he countered, playful as ever. 

He sat up, reaching into the pocket of his jeans. It was hard to see since it was dark outside, but when you clearly saw the velvet black box, you felt a rush of all different types of emotions exploding within you. Upon seeing your shocked face, he stupidly grinned before opening the box, confirming your suspicions about what was inside. 

“Jungkook….” your jaw dropped as you looked at the most beautiful diamond ring you had ever seen. 

“Y/n,” his hand found yours, “I love you so much baby. These past four years have been…. just, so amazing that it’s kind of hard to put into words, ya know? But the one thing I can tell you for sure is that we were meant to be together. You were literally made for me -- my handcrafted destiny. And I promise you that will never change. I promise that I will never stop loving you, I’ll never hurt you. I promise you that I will never break your heart.” 

Nothing could stop the way tears pooled into your eyes at his heartfelt words. You were speechless, only being able to mouth the words ‘I love you’ while Jungkook began laughing at you while wiping away your tears.  

“I know what you’re thinking but it’s not that, so don’t freak out! It’s a promise ring,” he took your left hand, placing said ring on your finger. 

You couldn’t even focus on his words, you just wanted to hug him. And so you did. As soon as he slipped the ring on your finger, you were wrapping him in your arms and tackling him to the ground, crying while laughing at the same time while he laughed with you. 

“Did you even hear me just now?” he chuckled. 

“Yes, not a proposal, but a promise ring,” you nodded. 

“Okay. Just keep in mind I will ask you to marry me one day,” he smirked. 

"And I, Y/n, promise you, Jungkook, that when that day does come, I'll say yes. If you would've asked me tonight I would have said yes with no hesitation." 

“Well then, I can’t wait for that day, hm?” 

“Yeah, me neither.” 

And that night, the two of you made love outside, underneath the stars. 

Now 

When you walked into the room you felt your stomach drop. Seeing your ex-boyfriend’s face months after the worst break up you’ve ever had instead of his best friend who you were planning to meet up with was not what you were expecting when you opened the door. 

“You’re not Namjoon,” a deep frown set on your face. 

“I know. I asked him to get you here. Y/n, please… just hear me out.” 

“No Jungkook,” you shook your head. “I believe you said enough the last time we saw each other, yea?” 

You turned, placing your hand on the doorknob and turning it. Before you could fully open it, you felt a force push it back closed with Jungkook’s strong presence behind you, his hand pressed against the door above your head.

“Y/n. Stay.” 

He whispered it in your ear and although he said it in a commanding voice, his voice was strained almost as if he was begging. You stood completely still for a moment, your heart and mind battling against each other even though you already knew their fight was pointless. In the end, your heart always made you cave. 

You turned to face him, realizing that you were completely trapped between him and the door, you quickly became uncomfortable. Fuck your stupid heart for not being able to resisit the man who broke it. 

“What do you want?” 

“I miss you.” 

You scoffed at that. 

“Well that’s something you could have communicated over the phone rather than creating this whole elaborate plan with Namjoon and getting him to lure me all the way to this hotel.” 

“You realize that you blocked me… on everything, right? I can’t communicate anything to you,” he rolled his eyes. 

“Yes, I realize that. And I did that for a reason. What part of ‘I never want to hear from you or see you again’ did you not understand from when we broke up?” 

“Oh I understood that shit perfectly and I still think it’s fucking bogus.” 

“Yea of fucking course you would. You know that was always your problem. You never see things from my point of view.” 

“Oh and what point of view would that be? Starting arguments over nothing because you’re bored to the point where we had to actually BREAK UP?” 

“Bored Jungkook? Really? I assure you that if I was really bored I would’ve found better ways of occupying my time than arguing with your ass over the same shit.” 

“Oh get real Y/n.” 

“No, you get real!! Your head is so far up your fucking ass that eight months later you still can’t see what you did wrong.” 

“There’s nothing to see! I didn’t do anything!!” 

“Jungkook I fucking told you on multiple occasions that I didn’t appreciate you entertaining that girl when she flirted with you! You know, the one who was only supposed to be a close FRIEND?!?” 

“Jesus Christ y/n, you act as if I FUCKED her. I didn’t even flirt back!” he stepped back from you, crossing his arms under his chest. 

“IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER! Do you understand how it made me feel?? How she would whisper with her friends, talk shit about OUR relationship and I just had to sit back and listen. OH but the ONE time I get drunk and flirt with Taehyung in a moment of weakness, suddenly I was the villain. Suddenly I destroyed our relationship and was all types of whores and sluts. Honestly Jungkook, you can go to hell.” 

“You flirted with my BEST FRIEND y/n.. Basically offered to suck his dick. I’m sorry, was I not supposed to get angry?” 

“No but I definitely wasn’t expecting you to disrespect me by calling me out of my name Jungkook!”

“I APOLOGIZED! I apologized as soon as I realized what I said. And I’ll apologize again if that’s what it’ll take to-” 

“No you don’t have to do shit. I’m leaving. I can’t believe I even stayed this long. Ugh, this is my problem. I’m always too nice to people who don’t deserve my kindness,” your words came out venomous. 

Jungkook bared his teeth, visibly upset before he walked towards you, forcing your body back into the wall. 

“No your problem was you never wanted to fucking talk. It was ALWAYS arguing with you. EVEN NOW! I invited you here to have a conversation and look at what you started!” 

“No YOU started it!” you poked your finger into his chest. “You knew exactly what would happen if we saw each other again which is exactly why you got me here under false pretenses. This is all your fault,” you screamed. “Everything. Was. Your. Fault.” you poked his chest with each word. 

Jungkook grabbed the finger you kept poking him with and it made you audibly gasp. He stared down at you with a look that came across as angry but having been in this position with him before, you could also notice a slight hint of lust in his eyes. 

He let go of your finger before gently pushing his palm into your chest, making your back hit the door and grabbing your wrists, holding them against the door. 

“Listen. To. Me,” he spoke slowly. “I am not putting up with your attitude tonight so stop.” 

“Make me.” 

It was like clock work, the way the two simple words you uttered set him off. He let go of one of your wrists to wrap his hand around your neck, choking you lightly and bent down to whisper in your breath. 

“Stop fucking playing with me Y/N. You already know what happens when you do that shit.” 

“Hmm… well it has been eight months. Maybe you need to refresh my memory?” you challenged. 

Jungkook grunted out of frustration before tightening his grip on your throat and kissing you. The kiss was rushed and furious, much different than the ones you’ve shared with him in the past. No matter how upset he was with you, his lips were always gentle on your skin, but this was completely different. He forced his tongue into your mouth and bit on your lips so hard you were worried he would draw blood. 

His other hand let go of your wrist, trailing it up your thigh to squeezing your waist and ultimately groping your ass while giving your lips a break to attack the sweet spots on your neck instead. 

“Fuck….” you moaned out when his hand began squeezing your breasts, brushing against your hard nipples. 

“You like when I play with your tits?” 

“Nope,” you spit out. “You’re barely doing anything for me right now.” 

“Hmm well you wanna know what I like? When you can’t talk. How about we shut you up.” 

He shrugged off his jacket, placing it on the floor before pushing you to your knees. Having been in this position before, you reacted automatically, rubbing his length through his pants a little. You unbuckled his belt and undid his pants before pulling them and his boxers down just enough to reveal his semi hard dick. After finally seeing it again after months, it would be a lie to say you didn’t miss it. 

“Suck. Now.” 

At his command, you looked up at him while wrapping your hand around his base, letting spit drip from your mouth onto him to make him wet. You moved your hand up and down his length a bit before finally taking him into your mouth, You let your tongue run on the underside of his dick from base to tip before wrapping your lips around his tip and lightly sucking, just like you knew he liked. You looked up at him, covering your teeth with your lips and taking his length further in your throat. One of his hands found purchase in your hair, guiding you up and down his length while his other was spread against the door as if using it to hold himself up. You felt him twitch in your mouth before there was a knock at the door. 

“Jungkook? Y/n? I just came to make sure you guys didn’t kill each other in here,” Namjoon joked wearily. 

“Yup! All good,” came Jungkook’s hasty response when he felt you take in his length completely, deepthroating him. 

“I see you’re acting out for Namjoon,” he whispered looking down at your teasing face before using your hair to push you further down and hold you there. 

After a few seconds he let you up, coughing up spit while gasping for air loud enough that Namjoon could hear. 

“Jungkook what was that? Where’s y/n?” 

“She’s here. She’s fine. We’re working it out. Bye Namjoon!” Jungkook made you go back to sucking his cock after letting you get a few breaths. 

“Maybe I should come in and mediate….” Namjoon contemplated, completely unaware of what was happening on the other side of the room. 

“Unless you want to see her choking on my dick, maybe now is not the best time Namjoon,” Jungkook was starting to get annoyed. 

“Oh… in that case.. I’ll just get going I guess…. Glad to hear you two are.. Working it out?” Both you and Jungkook could hear Namjoon taking off in the opposite direction of the room. It made you giggle a little bit, vibrating against Jungkook’s cock. Nearly cumming down your throat at the feeling, he slapped his hand against the door before using your hair to pull your mouth off of him. 

His hand wrapped around your arm, pulling your body back into a standing position before capturing your lips in a heated kiss again. 

“Fucking Namjoon….” Jungkook trailed off, his hands now exploring your body again. “And why the fuck were you coming to see Namjoon dressed like this?” He asked, referring to the tiny black dress you were wearing that barely covered your ass. 

You replied with the most petty thing you could think of. “I don’t know. Maybe it was so that I could finally fuck one of your best friends, like I was accused of doing.” 

Jungkook gritted his teeth, yet again visibly annoyed with you. “And how should I fuck you fuck, hm? Should I fuck you against the door? Make you scream my name? Make sure everyone in this hotel knows how much you’ve fucking missed me?” 

His fingers traveled under your dress and pulled your soaked panties to the side, easily slipping a finger into you and then adding another beginning to fuck you

“Ah, shit!” 

“Answer the question.” 

“Fuck! Yes, fuck me wherever you like” 

At that, he quickly ripped your underwear off your body and pulled your dress off, wanting as much access to your bare skin as possible. He pulled the rest of his pants off as you tugged his shirt off and threw it across the room. 

He pushed you completely against the door and raised one of your legs to wrap around his waist. Taking his length in his hand, he slapped it against your clit a few times, smirking at you as you whimpered at the feeling. He rubbed his length against your wet folds until you couldn’t take it anymore. 

“Jungkook,” you were annoyed. 

“Yes?” He looked at you with a sly smile on his face. 

“Just put it in!” 

“Beg me first.” 

“You’re so goddamn irritating.” 

“Now Y/n, is that any way to talk to someone who can give you what you so desperately need?” His condescending tone of voice only worked to aggravate you further, but you not wanting to waste anymore time, you gave in. 

“Please Jungkook! Please fuck me. I can’t wait anymore, it’s been too long. Please i-  I need you!” 

He pressed your waist further into the door before finally sliding inside of you. 

“I don’t want to hear anything out of your mouth that isn’t you begging or my name,” he whispered in your ear as he began to fuck you, his movements made easier by your wetness. “No talking back.” Hard Thrust. “No smart ass comments.” Hard thrust. “Nothing.”

When he began pounding into you, you lost your footing, almost slipping. With a grunt, Jungkook grabbed both of your thighs, hoisting you up against the door and trapping you under his body. With this new position, he spread your legs further, now being able to go deeper within you. When you felt his tip repeatedly nudge the spongy spot within you, you let out your loudest sound yet, a combination of Jungkook’s name and a moan. He apparently thought it was too loud because he covered your mouth with the palm. 

“Be quiet” he whispered in your ear harshly. 

You wrapped your hand around his wrist, moving his palm so that you could speak. “‘I’m sorry, it’s just so good, ugh fuck.” 

“Yea, bubby? Did you miss me fucking this tight pussy? Missed me pounding into you just the way you like?” 

The cute pet name he used to call you when you were in a relationship completely flew over your head. The only thing you could focus on was the way his cock felt sliding against your walls, throbbing inside of you. 

“God, please! Please make me cum.” 

“You wanna cum? You missed cumming all over my cock right?” 

“Fuck yes! God,” you cried out when he went harder, your body banging into the door with every thrust. 

Jungkook was too busy holding your body up so he could fuck you properly, so you one of the hands that was gripping his shoulders down to your throbbing clit, rubbing it so that you could bring yourself to your end. Jungkook’s eyes traveled down to where your fingers were working, biting his lip at the sight. 

“Mmhmm, yes bubby. Rub that little pretty clit of yours. Are you gonna make yourself cum, hmm? Be a good girl for once and make yourself cum for me?”

“Yes.. yes, I’m gonna cum so hard Jungkook, just for you! Ahhh, fucckkkk” You were spewing so many words in your moment of bliss that you couldn’t even recall what you were saying.Your legs trembled while your hands wrapped around Jungkook’s wrist as he fucked you through your high. Your entire body felt overwhelmed as you came, especially when Jungkook kissed you while you were still shaking all over his dick, making it even harder for you to breathe. 

Disconnecting your lips so you could both catch a breath, jungkook asked “You came so hard, can you take more?” 

“Yes. Please, I need more.” Jungkook could see in your eyes how fucked out you were. The look you gave him had his cock throbbing so hard that he felt he could cum in that exact moment. 

He carried your limp body to the bed on the other side of the room, placing you down on the edge and instructing you to move up towards the headboard, holding back a laugh as he watched you struggle to crawl with your worn out legs. 

He joined you on the bed, sitting on his knees between your spread legs, touching himself at the sight of your post-orgasm face and glistening wetness. Watching him bite his lip and touch himself while looking you dead in the eye had your worn out pussy whimpering for him again, demanding more, and you couldn’t wait. You wrapped your legs around his waist, prompting him to hover over you, hands right beside your head to hold himself up. 

“Do you want it?” 

You quickly nodded your head. 

“Words, bubby.” 

“Yes Jungkook.” 

And then you both watched as he slid his length back inside of your cavern. Compared to his fast and rough thrust earlier, these were slower and more calculated. He was grinding into you in a way where you could feel his pelvis brush against your clit every time he moved deeper into you. You cried out to him again from the overstimulation. 

“You okay y/n?” he questioned, not stopping his movements. 

“Yea, just sensitive. Please don’t stop,” you begged, 

“I promise I won’t. I don’t ever want to stop….” 

You couldn’t focus on his words while he moved inside you. All you could do is let the moans roll out of your mouth that hung wide open. And all Jungkook could do was watch, thinking about how much he missed this. How much he missed you. 

He lowered his body so that he was basically laying on top of you, one hand gripping your waist while the other gripped the sheet next to your head. He rolled his hips into you at a faster pace and you couldn’t help but fling your arms around him, holding on tight. He dropped his forehead to yours and you finally looked at him, really looked at him without the lust clouding your eyes. You were still able to read him the same way you always could. You finally noticed the drop in his earlier dominant persona and how he became softer with the way he touched you. 

You felt his love radiating through you. He was making love to you. 

“Fuck y/n, I’ve missed you so much.” 

“Jungkook … please, please don’t. Please just fuck me,” you begged. You couldn’t do this. You weren’t ready to face your feelings. 

“I can’t just fuck you. I want more. I want you.” Both of his hands found their way to yours, locking your fingers together while looking each other in the eye. “I only want you. It’s all I’ve ever wanted. I love you, bubby. I’ve never stopped… ugh, I promised I never would.”

His sudden confession made all of the emotions you thought you had locked away for the past eight months come back. You were crying. You were sobbing under the guise of pleasure.. It was all too bittersweet. Jungkook was simultaneously making your body feel good but your heart feel so sad. 

You couldn’t speak. You didn’t have the words. You just clamped your walls around him, pushing you both towards your climaxes. He squeezed your hands when he felt his balls tighten and cock throb, kissing you and groaning against your mouth as he came inside of you. He left open mouthed kisses on your face and down your body. This time, it was his fingers on your clit that brought you to your second end, all while whispering sweet, meaningful words in your ear about how beautiful you were and how much he misses you. It made your orgasm more intense, your feelings overriding your senses as you spasmed around his now soft cock inside of you. 

When he finally pulled out, he kissed you deeply for only a second, hugging your body closer to his and wiping your tears away as you both tried to catch your breath yet again. When the stickiness of your lower body began to feel as heavy as your heart and to Jungkook’s dismay, you got out of the bed and went into the bathroom, taking some time to clean up and silently sob into your hand before splashing water onto your tear stained cheek. You weren’t prepared for what would happen when you walked out the door and faced your ex lover again, but you knew you couldn’t avoid it either. 

Exiting the bathroom you saw Jungkook already dressed and  you scanned the room for your clothing which was mostly by the door. Jungkook silently watched as you dressed yourself and when he saw the look on your face when you turned around, he shot out of the bed and rushed towards you. 

“Marry me.” 

Your jaw dropped. “Jungkook…. What? Are you insane?!?” 

When he brought his hand into your line of sight, you recognized the item you threw at his chest eight months ago as you packed your bags and prepared to leave him. The cursed promise ring. 

“Do you remember when I gave this to you? I promised you that one day I would ask you to marry me. Well today is that day…... Do you remember what you promised me?” 

“Jungkook… “ 

“What did you promise me y/n?” he was desperate.

“I promised- I promised that I would say yes when you asked,” you mumbled, eyesight being blocked by fresh tears. 

“Well I’m asking,” he got down on one knee. “Y/n, will you marry me?” 

“This isn’t fair,” you sobbed. “I said that when we were still together. Things have changed Jungkook.” 

“Oh really? What’s changed y/n? We haven’t been together for a few months, but who cares. The only thing that matters is that our feelings haven’t been affected by our time apart. And they never will be. We’re always going to be in love. I promised you that.” 

Jungkook was crying himself at this point, and it broke you. Your head and heart were once again at war, but that didn’t matter. Nothing else could matter to you when the love of your life was on one knee in front of you, professing his undying love for you and asking you to spend the rest of your life with him. Your heart and your mind ultimately knew that he was right. Your feelings for him never changed, and they never would. There was no point trying to fight it. And yea he might have broken a promise or two, but he was making good on them now, and that was all that mattered. 

You took a deep breath and closed your eyes, before mumbling out a small “Yes.” 

When you opened your eyes, your new fiancé looked dumbfounded with the brightest smile you had ever seen on him. He cried out in joy before coming off his knee, lifting you up in his arms and twirling you around before trapping your face in his hands and kissing you as if his life depended on it. You couldn’t help but laugh as you wiped both his and your own tears away. 

“Was this your whole plan? To propose to me tonight?” 

“It was,” he grinned. “Now that I know what my life is like without you in it, I’m never letting you go again. And that’s a promise.” 

[lovemybluebully]

Danger Room Level 1

Posted this at the beginning of the year on my DA account. Thought I’d throw it up on here. This was my first Wolverine tickle pic in 4 years! O_O

https://www.deviantart.com/lovemybluebully/art/Danger-Room-Level-1-865337680

Wrote a little story to go along with it.

Story is below the ‘Keep Reading’ line.

*/M Tickle Fic (Obviously lol) "Any other surprise challenges for me today, bub? Or is that all ya got?" Wolverine smirked confidently up at the team leader of the X-men, glancing over his shoulder at the pile of rubble consisting of destroyed weaponry and dismembered sentinels and robots of all sizes. Cyclops only sighed as he shook his head and looked down at the Canadian brawler from the control room of their training facility, having exhausted almost every combination of attacks that he could think to throw at him.

These scenarios of Wolverine slicing and dicing up every obstacle and foe were quite predictable and honestly getting a tad boring to watch over and over. Scott decided it was time to try something a little different. "No, this just isn't working. These upper level programs are just all foreseeable for you. Lets try something new. I say we scrap everything and start over from scratch. How about we start you at level 1?"

Logan's smirk disappeared as he frowned up at the other man. "Level 1? Yer kiddin' me, right? That's the program the Professor uses to train the kiddies."

"Trust me Logan it'll be perfect for you. Since you've always skipped over the bottom levels you'll have no idea what they contain so you won't be able to predict them so easily. Hell I don't even know myself exactly what is on each level, but lets give it a shot! Maybe we'll both learn something." Scott actually wasn't lying since he himself had been too competent for those beginner programs when he had joined the X-men. It was likely that Logan would just blow right through them, but he was curious and quite frankly desperate for a change of pace. "Fine. But this is gonna be just a waste o' time," Logan grumbled as he lazily stretched out his arms and cracked his neck. "Don't underestimate the Danger Room and dismiss this program so easily. It may be aimed towards the less experienced, but should still provide its own formidable experience. Remember to stay alert and don't let your guard down." Wolverine just scoffed and blew off his advice like he normally did. "Yeah whatever Slim. Lets get on with it."

"Ok great. Now just a moment here. I'm initiating level 1....," Scott uttered with some fast typing on the control board before pressing one final button, "Now." They waited for a few quiet moments, but nothing happened. Logan was about to quip some sarcastic remark when finally the Danger Room began to show some activity. A compartment on the wall opened and two gloved robotic hands being controlled by metal tentacles began to slowly make their way over to him. Logan snorted in disbelief and shook his head as he looked over the two appendages and noted that they were not holding any kinds of weapons; basically looking completely harmless.

"That's it? This is ridiculous. What's next, a pillow fight? Not that I expected this crap to be any kinda challenge whatsoever," Logan rolled his eyes as he raised his hands into the air and released his deadly claws; ready to dispatch the advancing robot hands with a quick swipe once they closed in. Not even a second later he quickly found his arms ensnared as two metal tentacles had crept in from behind to successfully restrain him much to Logan's shock. He growled as he tried to slice at the tentacles with his sharp claws, but they firmly held his arms away from each other just above his head. The distraction had been just enough that he barely had time to notice that the gloved hands had now reached him as one of them wasted not a moment to grab hold of the hem of his uniform's shirt and roughly jerk it upwards, exposing his bare stomach.

"Hey! What is...?!" He shouted in confusion; his words cut off as the other hand immediately shot forward and buried it's furiously wriggling digits right into his muscular belly.

Logan hadn't listened to Scott. He had let his guard down completely when he had seen this "threat" first enter the room. His overconfidence was now going to be his downfall for mocking the capabilities of the robot hand; the hand that was now ruthlessly tickling him. This tactic was a complete shock to him, and having not put up any of his mental defenses in preparation the laughter exploded out of him as soon as contact was made. "Ahahahaahaa! Wha-Whahahat's goin' ohohohon?! Stahahap thaaat!" He howled out at the mindless hand that relentlessly continued tickling all over his sensitive abdomen; the other hand holding his shirt securely out of the way. Scott too was in complete awe by just what method the program had decided to use, though he couldn't help but grin as he saw the situation that his normally cantankerous teammate was now in. It was already a known fact by the mansion's inhabitants that Logan was surprisingly ticklish as his female team members found it quite endearing and took great delight in ganging up on the burly mutant at times. Heightened senses did have their drawbacks. Still nothing that Scott himself would partake in, knowing that while Logan might put up with it from the ladies he was pretty sure he'd be skewered on the spot if he even made a hint at attempting such a thing. In a way he now felt that he had a sense of power in having Logan in this position. "See? That's what happens when you underestimate the situation, now get to work Logan. Tickling probably isn't a real world offensive that you're going to run into, but no harm in being extra prepared." Wolverine's claws remained out, but he couldn't move his arms enough to free himself. Unable to think straight he continued to fail in his efforts to come up with a strategy to get out of this aside from yelling up at the amused operator in the control room. "Cyyyykehehehee! Tuhuhurn thihis shihihihiiit ohahahahoff!!" Arms bulging he thrashed uselessly in the grip of the tentacles, trying to block the torturous hand from his body by lifting his knee to no avail. He'd been tickled worse than this before, but never had he been this helpless to defend himself. Meanwhile Scott mused over the scene before him. It in fact was a little stupid to be messing with one of the world's deadliest mutant's like this, and he was pretty sure there would be Hell to pay later. His hand hovered momentarily over the button to shut down the Danger Room, but then he pulled back. "No, I think you just need a little more time to figure this out. I have faith in you. I mean, this program is only used to train the 'kiddies', right?" Yup. He was pretty sure Logan was going to kill him after this. "Fuhuhuhuck yooooouuuu!!" Logan cackled as he desperately tried to regain some kind of focus though was only barely able to retract his claws back into his hands, knowing that they were of no use. "Aw c'mon Logan. You're not that ticklish, are you? Can't resist just one little hand tickling you?" Scott couldn't help but tease a bit, having on more than one occasion seen Logan nearly lose his mind from just having his stomach tickled by his teenage sidekick, Jubilee. No sooner had he said that when a third hand began to move in from out of Logan's sight before grabbing the squirming mutant right below his ribs as the fingers playfully dug in over and over again.

"Bwahahahahahahahahaa!! Noooo!! Gehehet 'em offa meeheeheehee!!" Roaring with laughter from the added torture Logan was regretting not taking the lowest level of the Danger Room more seriously. With his arms being held out of the way he couldn't even use them to help guard his body no matter how hard he pulled to free them. It wasn't much longer before his legs began to weaken as he attempted to sink to the floor to hopefully get him a split second of reprieve.

He was allowed to move to the ground, but the hands were unrelenting. With a firm tug the restraining tentacles around his forearms pulled him down onto his back as a few more hands now appeared seemingly out of nowhere to join in tickling under his arms and the other side of his ribcage.

"No!! No!! Stahahahap ihihihihit!! Lemme outtahahaha heeheeheeeere!!" The Wolverine howled as he kicked and squirmed like crazy; his armpits being one of his worst spots. Two other metal tentacles quickly slithered over and grabbed onto each leg to stretch him out and prevent him from curling up in defense. Tears crept out of the corners of his eyes from laughing so hard as so far he had made no progress in getting loose. "Very disappointing Logan. I thought for sure you'd have passed all these lower levels with ease. Well it seems we've uncovered your true weakness. Something that your healing factor won't protect you from. We'll probably have to repeat this level over and over until you get it right," Scott grinned wider, only half serious as he liked to push Logan's buttons at any given opportunity. He was hardly listening though; too focused on the incessant tickle torture. Just when he thought it couldn't get any worse two additional hands made their way over and quickly tugged off his boots, revealing his twitching bare feet as Logan's eyes bulged in panic. "HEY!! Hey hey waahaahaait a m...minute!! No don't!! Not the-AAAHAHAHHAHAHA!!" Fingers wildly scratched at his tender soles, tickling from his wide heels to up under his curled up toes with not a thing he could do to stop them. He was laughing harder than he'd ever had as the tears began to roll down his cheeks. He absolutely could not handle having his feet tickled and once had accidentally kicked Rogue for trying. Luckily she is a tough woman though she used it as an excuse to really punish him with his ankles trapped in the crook of her super strong arm while Logan hysterically cried 'Uncle'. This was more than he could stand. Being spread out and tickled in all his most sensitive spots at once with no way to guard himself was where he drew the line. He loathed the thought of what he was about to do, but he couldn't hold back the frantic pleas that came pouring out. "NAAAHAHAHAHAHOOOO!! N-NO MORE!! STOPSTOP!! PLEEHEEHEEEEASE!! I CAN'T..HAHAHAHAHAA..CAAHAAHAAN'T T-TAKE THIHIHIIS SHIIIIIT!!" Scott was just enjoying the show as he chuckled and shook his head in disbelief. "Wow. Who knew? All one has to do to defeat Wolverine is to tickle him and he'll be begging for mercy. Better hope none of your enemies ever find out about this one."

And with that he finally pushed the button to shut down the currently running program in the Danger Room. He'd have been more than happy to let it keep going, but even he could feel some sympathy for his frenemy and knew once he started begging that he had had enough. Logan instantly panted in relief as the hands all stopped tickling him while he was gently released from the restraints, everything then retracting back into the chambers that they had emerged from. A giggle escaped him here and there as he still had a phantom feeling of the fingers all over on his body.

Scott slowly clapped his hands in jest from the control room as he grinned down at the seemingly lifeless body. "Not bad, Logan! I think you almost had it there, but I'm sure you'll do better next time! So what do you think? Ready for level 2?"

The middle claw that immediately popped out of Logan's fist crudely gave him his answer.

[seerofmike]

The Writing In Apex Kinda Sucks And Also They Use Ship Bait As A Plot Device I Hate It Here

a stupid essay/rant encouraged by @zombiegloss that originally started as a youtube video script so if its like. weird at points. this was intended to be a verbal rant SNZISKSIA

basically i'm gonna talk abt the caustic-wattson-crypto relationship drama and how i think it was mishandled and how much the writers kind of Suck because i Can

you are free to disagree with me on any of my points and think that this aspect of the story was handled well, this is just my opinion, and i'd love to hear your thoughts and counterpoints !

first, addressing some things:

i know this is a battle royale and not necessarily a story-based game, so i can’t expect it to have masterful witcher-style writing.

but with the direction the game seems to be going; putting quests, evolving interactions, and comics in the game, plus coming out with a lore book and hinting at something bigger in the future, i think it’s fair to criticize it for lackluster writing, especially since what i’m criticizing has been something present since Apex’s story technically began.

secondly, i am not a professional writer. i’m a high schooler who writes as a hobby. i don’t have the decades of experience that some of the apex writers do, and i can’t claim to be a better writer than they are--but i also don’t have to be a five-star chef to realize that something tastes bad. when i critique something and give suggestions, i am not saying i could’ve done it better. i’m just bringing up what i think could have worked.

third, before i upset anyone , when i say a relationship is badly written, i’m not telling you that you can’t ship it or that your ship sucks. i’ll briefly touch on the shipping aspect of this and how it’s a detriment to the story but Ye

okay, so with that out of the way, let us Begin

relationships are often the emotional core of a story, and how strong your reaction is to conflict in these relationships depends on how the story sets them up. if you want the audience to care about these characters and what they go through, you need to develop them and establish the type of relationship they have well. it’s why so many people cried in the last episode of telltale’s the walking dead. you’ve spent roughly 12 hours bonding with clementine and protecting her, and your relationship with her is part of several story beats as well as character beats for lee. 

when these two characters’ relationship reaches its peak at the end of the game, it’s powerful, and it’s emotional. you care. you feel something, and the fact that you have to choose what to do to lee only makes it more gut-wrenching. 

now, the walking dead is entirely story-based and especially character-driven, so it may be unfair to compare it to apex, but i just wanted to lay the groundwork down for what i think is a strong relationship that makes you feel something when conflict arrives, in this case the conflict being lee getting bit and clementine having to decide his fate.

the broken ghost in general is kind of not-good sometimes, tom casiello previously wrote for soap operas and you can really, REALLY tell sometimes.

this story feels like it should’ve taken place a little later, and that we should’ve had a season to actually set up the characters and their relationships, but that’s a story for another day.

to put it bluntly, the set-up for the crypto, wattson, and caustic conflict is done poorly. for caustic and wattson's relationship it’s a little better, but not by much. 

wattson and caustic having a relationship was hinted at in season 2, when her lore indicated that caustic was among one of the Legends who comforted her after her father died. In season four lore materials posted on Twitter, an email from Jacob Young states that Caustic is acting paternal towards Wattson. In season five, interactions get added to the Game, and this is the first time we actually see their relationship in action, as they have unique revive voice lines for each other. in the quests, when wattson is injured, caustic lashes out at loba and attacks her out of what seems to be anger at wattson’s current state.

Side Note this plot point was really stupid and done for cheap drama because she literally wakes up like two chapters later and they don’t even give her anything to say it’s just suddenly oh yeah crypto and wattson are working together. the same exact injury thing happens to octane later but nobody gIVES A SHIT because again, it’s just cheap soap opera drama.

their relationship might seem a little bit sudden for anyone who wasn’t on top of twitter lore drops, but like, it’s okay, i guess. i’ll give it the slightest credit for at least establishing something between the two in terms of voice lines and stuff, even if for some it might seem like it came out of nowhere.

what did come out of nowhere, though, was crypto and wattson’s friendship. in the quests, crypto and wattson are tasked with rebuilding the broken ghost because of their respective skills, and they’re seen talking in chapter six while they work on it. we’re not really given a clear timeline on how long the story in the broken ghost is, but i think it takes about a week, maybe.

unlike wattson and caustic, their relationship has been given absolutely zero material to work with before now, not even a passing glance in the trailers--which is a little weird considering crypto took down the repulsor tower and destroyed wattson’s home, but. Whatever.

tl dr of the chapter: crypto and wattson talk to each other while doing nerd shit, crypto laughs at wattson’s bad pun, and then suddenly they’re BESTIEEEES, until a couple dozen lines later in the same chapter. then they’re Not.

crypto’s drone gets hacked by revenant while everyone was kind of on edge after the reveal of a spy in their midst, he gets framed as the spy by caustic, anddddd wattson gets upset.

before i get into how dumb this storyline is, i’m gonna talk about the set-up to this conflict.

we have been given no reason to believe that these characters have ever talked to each other, and quite frankly, their friendship doesn’t really make sense.

ignoring the fact that crypto destroyed wattson’s home--which she probably doesn’t know about, so that’s forgiven for now--crypto is a paranoid guy. in the lore book he makes people stand on fucking footprints in his house so he can scan them for weapons and listening devices, and he apparently doesn’t stick around much after the games and nobody knows anything about him because he doesn’t talk to them.

a key part of crypto’s story is the fact that he is undercover and afraid of anyone finding out anything about him ever. him becoming friends with wattson kind of comes out of the blue, and we’re not even given a reason as to why they supposedly became close in the first place. i would kind of understand if like, maybe he draws parallels with her and mila in his mind and it makes him open up a little more, but that doesn’t happen. he just laughs at her joke and suddenly they’re friends.

maybe they’re trying to go for this ‘wattson can become friends with anybody’ angle, kind of hinted at with caustic but not really we’ll get into that, but that also? kind of doesn’t make sense since so many of her voice lines straight-up say she doesn’t understand people and electricity is more her thing, but honestly, she also does have those really friendly elements in her voice lines too, so its not as egregious as what they did with crypto.

their sudden out-of-the-blue friendship would’ve been fine if they spent a little more time fleshing it out, and giving us something to work with, but instead, the story immediately tries to rip it apart and frame it as this grand conflict where crypto is framed as the mole, crypto then accuses caustic, and wattson feels betrayed.

except it doesn’t really work, because we don’t give a shit. for several reasons. 

one: crypto and wattson became friends and then ended their friendship in the same exact chapter. they did not speak to each other onscreen until this chapter began, you can read the entire quest on the wiki and see for yourself that their interactions up until that point were nonexistent aside from mentions in the narration that they were building something together.

the reason wattson feels betrayed is kind of stupid too. why does she really care that much if one of them betrayed loba? nobody else really cared about the fact that one of them was a spy, in fact, nobody even seems to like loba that much, and they just found out that loba’s been lying to them this whole time, and wattson was conscious for that conversation and had a speaking line, so she’s fully aware of the situation. 

maybe it’s just like, the idea that one of them lied, but that’s still kind of a weak reason. 

this entire betrayal thing is just dumb, and it gets even worse when you realize that there could have been an actual legitimate reason for wattson to feel betrayed by crypto--even if it still would’ve come across as weak conflict because of their newly established friendship, it would’ve made more sense than this. 

Crypto destroyed Wattson’s home. He took down the tower and then all the flyers and stuff invaded Kings Canyon and made it their bitch. Not only that, but Wattson considers the Syndicate her family. The Syndicate are the very people who framed Crypto for murder and he’s trying to take them down. 

They could’ve set up actual conflict with these things, and it almost seemed like they would, because Caustic briefly brings up that Crypto could be working with Revenant because he has something against the Syndicate but then that doesn’t really go anywhere and we’re just back to Wattson feeling betrayed because either Crypto or Caustic was a spy and she doesn’t know who.

Weak conflict could’ve been made better by a strong relationship and a weak relationship could’ve still been interesting with strong conflict, but both the relationship between Crypto and Wattson and the conflict that drives them splitting up as friends were really weak and didn’t make much sense. 

It would’ve been ten times more interesting if Wattson found out Crypto ruined her home, the arena she grew up in, and was now participating in the Games to take out the people she regards as her family. That’s where her distrust could’ve manifested and conflict could’ve began, but instead it was the stupid betraying loba thing. why do you care. you just started talking to this guy like 2 hours ago.

also caustic’s whole reason for framing crypto feels stupid as fuck. he didn’t just frame crypto randomly, he framed him specifically because he doesn't want him to influence wattsob because he likes her Big Brain, but this is the FIRST time we have seen those two interact. 

what influence is he talking about? wraith and wattson have been shown to be friendly with each other in the trailers, according to tom’s tweets, and in the story too so why doesn’t he frame her? at this point the audience had slightly more build-up for those two’s relationship than crypto and wattson and a betrayal storyline would’ve felt a little more deserved if still weak.

this is the point where i briefly want to touch upon shipping, and the fact that part of this conflict feels driven by shipbait. 

aside from their relationship coming out of nowhere and the writers trying to make the stakes seem high and deeply emotional to the characters involved (despite this essentially being the first time they’ve ever interacted) tom casiello literally addresses shippers in a tweet regarding chapter seven, and as the story between these characters progresses, it becomes clear to me, at least that the crypto-wattson thing is just bait for shippers, and it’s lazy. 

it’s easy to get away with giving your characters little to no relationship development if you’re just counting on shippers to do the heavy mental lifting for you

why should i put any effort into making this relationship seem believable? people are going to see a young guy and a young girl having bare minimum interaction and assume there’s romantic interest! then i don’t have to do any work, see look, it’s a ready-made relationship wrapped in a bow for me! all that’s left for me to do is give them conflict so i can keep teasing shippers with lines like ‘you never deserved her’!

i think it’s reasonable for me to suspect shipbait, since tom casiello likes doing darksparks shipbait on twitter, and i’m like, eighty percent sure mirage and bloodhound suddenly being childhood friends in the book is shipbait too, because these characters were the number one ship in apex for a long time despite little to no interaction, and then all of a sudden in the lore book they’re childhood friends despite this literally never being mentioned before?

like bloodhound is set up to be mysterious and nobody knows what they look like, or where they’re from, or who their family is--except for mirage Apparently, who played with them when he was a kid on their home planet, and has seen them with their mask off, because bloodhound did not wear a mask when their parents were still alive.

its weird.

i’m pretty sure they’ve said somewhere they were working on this book before apex even came out, so i could just be completely wrong and they always planned for mirage and bloodhound to know each other, but if that’s the case, why did they never mention it like they did octane and lifeline?

i refuse to believe MIRAGE never brought it up either like ‘heeeeyy bloodhound remember when we used to throw eggs at our parents lab haha wanna go do to that to bangalore’s room’ 

[silence]

‘good talk buddy’

ANYWAYS I GOT OFF TOPIC. POINT IS, shipping is a detriment to the story because the writers don’t feel like they actually have to put any work into establishing or developing the relationship between characters when they know the community’s just going to do it for them anyways, and that they can put in shipbait and it’s fine and it makes sense when it really doesn’t.

imagine watching captain america civil war after not seeing a single other marvel movie.

why would you care about the avengers splitting up or tony and steve butting heads or steve’s commitment to bucky? you wouldn’t care, at least not as much as someone who’s seen all the movies and knows the relationship between the characters and why the sokovia accords exist in the first place. you don’t have context and you don’t have any reason to be emotionally invested in these characters’ relationship.

 this feels like that. the writers tried to squeeze this relationship and stuff into a single chapter and we don’t fucking care unless we were already invested in the idea of their relationship (shippers) because we barely spent any time with it.

so to summarize this little section, the set-up of this storyline Kinda Sucks! crypto and wattson barely seem to know each other, because we the audience barely saw them together and the writers are relying on shipbait in place of a relationship.

wattson and caustic are a little better but not great, but the conflict is stupid and it only gets stupider.

moving onto summarizing the rest of the broken ghost, gibraltar and caustic talk, caustic LITERALLY confesses to being the mole and says he framed crypto so he couldn’t corrupt wattson and to appear innocent because his identity was suspected, then that wraps up the season storyline.

season six begins with new voice lines, where wattson has had enough of crypto and caustic’s shit and is all passive-aggressive and going ‘this doesn’t change anything’. she has to decide who to trust, and how to figure out The Truth for herself because she’s not a little girl anymore. crypto and caustic are both trying to convince her they’re innocent and it creates some interesting conflict.

just kidding. it’s terrible conflict. you want to know why?

BECAUSE GIBRALTAR TRIED TO TELL HER THE TRUTH, RIGHT AFTER THE SEASON 5 QUEST HAPPENED, AND SHE LITERALLY REFUSED TO HEAR IT.

LIKE THERE’S A SEASON 6 LOADING SCREEN WHERE HE’S TELLING EVERYONE THE TRUTH ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED, AND WHEN HE GETS TO WATTSON AND IS LIKE HEY I KNOW WHO THE MOLE WAS AND WHY THEY DID IT, SHE JUST GOES i dont wanna hear it. i need to think

IF YOU WANT THE TRUTH WHY ARE YOU REFUSING TO HEAR IT

SHE SPENDS ALMOST TWO ENTIRE SEASONS MAD AT CRYPTO FOR SOMETHING HE DIDN’T DO BECAUSE SHE TOLD GIBRALTAR TO FUCK OFF WHEN HE TRIED TO TELL HER WHAT HAPPENED

ITS SO DUMB

i think it was towards the end of season 6 or the beginning of season 7 where apex posted this picture of wattson asleep at her desk where she has a letter from gibraltar on it that looks like it tells her the truth, so she knows now, she knows what happened, but NOW her issue is the fact that she doesn’t know anything about crypto.

WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT IS YOUR GODDAMN DAMAGE. YOU DON’T KNOW SHIT ABOUT BLOODHOUND EITHER ARE YOU THIS UPSET WITH BLOODHOUND TOO?? HAVE YOU EVER TALKED TO PATHFINDER. DO YOU HATE PATHFINDER TOO

oh but she was friends with crypto and now she’s mad that he lied to her EXCEPT THEIR RELATIONSHIP WASN’T BUILT UP WELL SO IT JUST FEELS STUPID. THEY SPENT LONGER BEING NOT-FRIENDS THAN THEY SPENT BEING FRIENDS. THEY BECAME FRIENDS IN ONE CHAPTER AND THEN IMMEDIATELY AT THE END OF THAT CHAPTER THEIR FRIENDSHIP ENDED AND THEN WATTSON SPENT LIKE 2 SEASONS MAD AT HIM FOR SOMETHING HE DIDN’T DO . 

AND THE WRITERS TRIED TO RECTIFY THIS BY SAYING OH SHE’S NOT MAD ABOUT THE TRAITOR THING SHE’S MAD BECAUSE SHE DOESN’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT HIM AND IT’S LIKE WHY THE FUCK DID YOU NOT MAKE THAT CLEAR WHY DOES SHE SAY ‘IT DOESN’T CHANGE WHAT YOU DID’ IN HER VOICE LINES WHY DOES SHE CALL HIM A TRAITOR IF HER CONFLICT WAS HER NOT KNOWING MUCH ABOUT HIM . WHAT DID HE DO. 

HE JUST STOOD THERE AND LAUGHED AT HER JOKE AND THEN HE GOT FRAMED AND THEN THAT WAS THE END OF THE CHAPTER AND NOW SHES SUDDENLY LIKE IM ACTUALLY MAD BECAUSE YOURE A LIAR AND I CANT TRUST YOU EVEN THOUGH I NOW KNOW YOU WERE FRAMED I STILL DO NOT LIKE YOU AND HES LIKE YEAH THATS MY FAULT

The Caustic voicelines are stupid too, again his reason for framing Crypto was stupid and a lot of his voicelines just seem to be that shipbait thing again but like from the angle of overprotective dad who doesn’t like the new boyfriend. it’s stupid but not as egeregious as this next part which is

crypto telling wattson his identity.

CRYPTO was framed for MURDER and is paranoid and can’t trust anyone and doesn’t talk to anyone and the last time he did talk to someone he got framed for Another thing and the person he was talking to turned her back on him and actively refused to know the truth for like 2 seasons and then he went This Is Fine I Can Tell Her My Identity

the stupidest update to this storyline was crypto telling wattson the truth

why did they do it on the dropship where there are presumably syndicate members and other legends around.

why didn’t he scan wattson for listening devices like he did for pathfinder in the book.

why is he telling her his identity when he knows she has very close ties to the people that FRAMED HIM for MURDER. Does he trust her that much? WHY? They spoke to each other in a chapter and then spent two seasons not talking to each other beyond passive-aggressive BS. why are you so fucking stupid taejoon

their relationship was so poorly set-up that even if the writers maybe intended for them to come across as close friends who had spent weeks bonding, it really feels like they became friends in a single conversation, had a falling out, and now crypto suddenly trusts her with his identity after an undetermined amount of time because he wants to be friends again. 

that does not make SENSE this conflict feels contrived AS FUCK and the resolution feels even worse and unearned UGGGHHHH

it honestly comes across as crypto feeling desperate for friendship, and maybe this would’ve worked better if that’s the angle they played it as.

he’s been alone for roughly two years, and just wants a friend, and he’s honestly so lonely he just breaks down to the first person who’s really talked to him. it could’ve been an interesting little part of his character, and they could've gone into depth about how much this situation has affected him, but that’s not what they’re doing. he’s still paranoid and anxious and doesn’t trust anyone, except for wattson, because the plot needs him to or else there won’t be any stupid soap opera drama.

and to rub salt in the wound, wattson’s new voice lines with caustic have him telling her that she forgave crypto.

WHAT ARE YOU FORGIVING HIM FOR. ARE YOU FORGIVING HIM FOR BEING FRAMED? WHY DID HE HAVE TO APOLOGIZE TO YOU WHEN YOU WERE THE ONE WHO REFUSED TO HEAR THE TRUTH?

 did the conversation just go hey my real name is taejoon park and something bad happened to me and she went aight i forgive you WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

Caustic’s new voice lines to Crypto where he’s like ‘what did you tell her’--YOU TOLD GIBRALTAR STRAIGHT-UP YOUR EVIL MASTER PLAN LIKE A SUPERVILLAIN AND NOW YOU’RE SURPRISED WATTSON AND CRYPTO ARE ON GOOD TERMS NOW?!

THAT’S LIKE TELLING SOMEONE YOUR SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER AND THEN BEING SURPRISED WHEN YOU BECOME THE VICTIM OF IDENTITY FRAUD. YOU SET YOURSELF UP FOR THIS WHY ARE YOU ACTING LIKE CRYPTO DID SOMETHING SINISTER OR LIED OR WHATEVER. WHAT THE FUCK. WHY DO YOU HAVE LIKE 3 BRAINCELLS

this is at like ten pages already so i’m going to just try and wrap this up quickly. 

it’s frustrating seeing this storyline play out when there are actually good relationships and storylines written into apex. i’m kind of getting tired of the loba and revenant conflict, but we at least had set-up to it in the form of a few animated shorts and it doesn’t play out as stupidly as this story does. bangalore and loba’s friendship is actually developed well, even if the point between the end of season 5 and season 6 where they suddenly talk like each other feels like it could’ve used a little more. 

where crypto and wattson having an established friendship in the broken ghost failed, lifeline and octane’s established friendship works because we’ve been told since octane’s release they were childhood friends and given lore materials that indicate they’ve known each other for a very long time.

apex wants this storyline between crypto and wattson and caustic to feel dramatic and tense and ultimately rewarding when crypto and wattson did become friends for real and stuff, but instead it just comes across as hollow and empty. 

there’s nothing there. it’s a case of tell, don’t show, and it looks like this stupid conflict is gonna keep going for another couple of seasons at this rate. 

side note: this entire script was written before the new twitter comics

please tell me ur thoughts and feel free to respond with ur own lil essay

also believe it or not this is not the "shipping is a detriment to apex's story" essay i was gonna write this is a completely different essay that has some overlap SKXISOSOW

[siren-virus]

You know what? Just because you’d be able to talk my ears off with LuckyBoy!AU, I’m gonna keep asking you about it with long asks so I can get long answers (I love reading long answers since they give out so much info and speculation, while leaving room for discussion as well). So let's have a chat through asks so neither of us have anxiety(?) while talking to each other in messages.

Who would be some of the regulars when Ben is working at the cooffe shop? (I also love this au XD) Would Cooper, Rook, Gwen, Max and/or anyone else go at the same time as a group and have a casual conversation with the barista? Would Ben accidently gain confidential information about the Plumbers this way? I wonder if he would be famous between the aliens and humans near Undertown as one of the few humans that's actually chill with every alien regardless of appearances thanks to knowing Gwen with the Omnitrix from before?

I feel like Ben purposefully avoiding Cooper as his vigilante persona would start as a measure to avoid his identity being exposed (I belive it was Cooper who exposed him in UAF, right?), but later would develop into a troll play, waiting for him to finally find him and play a prank there.

Would Ben play pranks on Will Harangue for giving him bad publicity to the humans? I mean, it's not like he can just appear in front of a camera and tell his side of the story, he would be captured instantly, or interrupted at the very least; and he having his own social media wouldn't work too well since he isn't a tech genius and the Plumbers could track him down.

Also, what has Gwen done that they think they need Ben to protect them from her? Like yeah, in OV there's a lot of property damage, but they don't believe they need protection from him (at least I don't think so), so she must've done something big in order for that to happen.

And now an ask that isn't directly related to Ben XD Who would be some of the people leading an investigation against the vigilante, trying to discover his identity as well as species? Like I imagine Rook would be more of an addon to said investigation, being on the lookout but not actively investigating everything that Ben has been involved with, and Gwen has a lot on her plate, so let's not let her join said investigation.

Oh oh oh, I just thought about it, if Ben could be considered an Anodite in this AU, what happened when Verdona appeared in that one episode of AF? Did she manage to find Ben in the first place and almost but not quite take him away? Does the rest of the family know he's an Anodite and what are their thoughts about it? If they don't then how would Ben explain some of the magic things that he does and someone witness?

Ohohoh, buttering me up are ya? Well you're in for a brain dump.

Ok, first I gotta say: The alien cafe is separate to the plumbers (the plumbers have their on cafeteria, but like to indulge in other food sometimes, and non-instant coffee.)

So I was thinking, one of Ben's regular coworkers is Alan Albright. Reason for this is because Alan is not allowed to go on missions often. He's too young. I mean I know they definitely have child soldiers in OS- buuuut Max's influence has put a stop to that. He's seen how it affected Gwen. So, Alan is put on easy patrols in low crime area, in the city.

Alan, however wants in on the action, so Max had suggested the cafe. Ben and Alan have a very brotherly bond, and Ben (outside of his vigilante life) has been swaying Alan's opinion on both, the plumbers and his alter ego.

Manny, Alan, Helen and Cooper- When not busying himself with the tech lounge- (sorry, Pierce is still dead in this), will often come by the cafe, they sit in a booth and discuss things. Most occasions Ben is invited to sit with them.

When Gwen pops by their interactions are brief, Ben would try to tease her about anything and everything under the sun. "See Kevin lately?" "Oh, got beat by the walking glow stick again, huh?" "Geez, another jail break? 3rd time this week!"

Normally he gets a fiery reaction and a nasty retort.

Of course Ben would take every opportunity he can to get info. At first it wasn't intentional, he'd just eaves drop on a few conversations that interested him. As time goes by though, he's found that a lot of people, plumber, criminal and just outer space travelers, are more than happy to unload some gossip. Ben is very much delighted by that.

He's not exactly famous, he's well known for being a friendly person, yes. But not all throughout Undertown.

ain't cooper the blond dude with some kinda telekenetic power that ended up turning into an almost Kevin duplicate? (i'll fix that) NGL I forgot he grew up in UAF.

Pretty sure the one that exposed Ben was the nerd who was voiced by the VA of Robin (TeenTitans/Go). Now that you bring it up though, that guy... Jimmy, is someone to be avoided, cause he's a snoopy guy. Who also hangs out at the cafe a lot to get details. Always ends up harassing Ben cause he knows Ben has all the juicy gossip.

And yeah Ben would totally take advantage of it to mess with the poor kid.

Definitely. Ben would mess with Will Harangue as much as possible. Especially when he goes live. Ben won't confront him personally, or do anything that could possibly reveal his indentity. He's got a lot of unique mannerisms that his family could quickly pick up on, there's also his voice, although muffled by the mask, if it's recorded enough- it's another identifier.

So that leaves Ben with his sticker trail. They're very bright, almost blinding, so Ben's stickers are an annoying inconvenience. He could also use a weak spell that causes it's victims to yawn/sneeze. Maybe he'll hang in the background briefly and wave. Just some of things he does to get under Harangue's skin basically.

Gwen:

So, you picked up on what I've hinted at. Good.

Before I go into Gwen, I'll say this: The plumbers are stationed on Earth to protect humanity. That means the aliens who have immigrated are less of a priority. That doesn't mean that they're completely unsafe, the plumbers still patrol Undertown and look after the people- just less so.

Aliens that leave Undertown especially- Normally they're ushered back by a few Plumbers standing guard- those that pose a threat or seem to pose a threat are dealt with by the plumbers. Which isn't too bad, just a slap on the back, a fine, maybe jail time.

Unless you run into Gwen. Who is much more intimidating, much more brutish, she won't exactly hold back. So- she hasn't got the best rep with Undertown. She's still a hero. Known throughout the universe. Just not a kind one.

On several occassions, Ben(vigilante) has had to step in to get her to back down from dealing with criminals.

The plumbers don't have a lot to go on with the investigating. Ben doesn't leave any DNA trails, cause anodites have no DNA. No hair strands, no finger prints, no blood. Even his stickers. They got nothing, nada.

That doesn't mean it's completely hopeless. A clean hit to Ben has on more than one occasion shocked him out of his anodite form, reverting him back to human (which is why he has the glasses and face mask, as a just incase scenario.) Sometimes even spooking/shocking him can make him human again. If his focus is messed with he's human, kinda deal.

So the plumbers are aware of this. They do their best to be as violent and destructive when they see Ben. They're attempts usually fail unless they have someone competent enough with them, Ie; Gwen, Rook.

Villains are also aware of this. So risky buiz am I right?

In regards to Verdona; honestly, I feel like having her know about Ben's existence as an anodite would kinda nerf this whole thing completely. Verdona, I bet, would be a massive gossip. Although her contact with Max is limited, he'd hear about it eventually. Game over. There's also Sunny, who would take advantage of this information and spread it across the universe.

So instead maybe Verdona pays a visit later rather than now.

She'd also be less inclined to take Ben back home, I like how Verdona is indifferent to Ben but loves Gwen, I wanna keep that aspect.

To explain any magic happenings that his family or friends have spotted, he just says he's practicing to be an illusionist. Or he broke a glow stick, or his has glitter in his pocket. (He always has something retaining to magenta hidden up his sleeve.)

Hopefully that got all your questions answered for now!

[ficletfan]

The human reader that's star struck , my bad. Aaravi and Vera with a human start struck reader ^^

Alright, i'm very happy with those star struck ones, they are long but I love em 💞 so I'll do them long like the others

Vera:

- You're an self funded paranormal investigator, Ghosts, monster sightings and the strange occurrences around the human realm

- Bust after bust you are frustrated beyond belief, you finally... Cave in and make a deal with some sketchy sources.

-Well you arrive, hand over the last of your money and--- wake up in grass the next morning... Fuck

-You've been duped, at least that's what you think, but you don't know where you are, certainly not the creepy abandoned building you made your deal in

- Wandering reveals something really damn weird, there aren't people jogging this morning, or the normal morning traffic of school goers but legitimate monsters in their daily lives!

- Perhaps you weren't completely duped. Your camera! You need it... Fuck, you don't even have that?! your voice recorder you keep your logs in! excitedly you ramble into this little metal box about your discoveries and how they're just living their lives like people

- looking kinda like a creep you pocket your box and walk down the side walk, almost giggling with glee

- Until the police were there... Are humans illegal? No but they give you a ticket fine for skipping school

- Stupidly, you reply "I can't pay for this, I don't have any money" this is where you learn the police are just like thugs and start mugging you for whatever will pay that fine

- and oh boy it hurts, monsters hit hard, you're certainly bruised if not having a few broken ribs already.

- after they're satisfied with whatever else they took the cops indignantly drop you off in front of spooky high

- where you immediately meet a pair of heeled feet, er more so the woman connected to those heels

- knowing your paranormal you immediately know that she's a gorgon! So you don't make eye contact and scramble to your feet, She casually questions of thats your first time being ruffled by the police

- "Well not around here but in my hometown, many times" her laugh is hypnotic "how cute"

- She of course doesn't seem to be able to tell what you are, you know under all the dirt, blood and your long coat over your clothes

- Having no one else to turn to you follow Vera inside the school, childishly grinning at everything you see, "what are you, new?" Its sarcastic but you nod, All morning she tours you around- unwillingly, it's more of you following her and asking her questions about the school and the people in it until lunch

- Coach won't let you into the cafeteria until you clean up, no if ands or buts sooo of course he forces Vera to go with you, she's just about to the level of mad where shes gonna poison your food later

-Vera takes you by the arm and drags you to the bathroom and grumpily leans against the wall until you're done

- oh no. You're... Cute, but she scolds herself for not noticing you're a human sooner, humans are super rare and... Really valuable if she knows how you got here. Damn those bruises though, they really hurt you didn't they?

- from then on shes much less rough with you, physically, still abrasive as usual, even inviting you to sit with her daily (it starts as gaining your trust but damn she loves how smart you are)

- you get hurt a lot, being human and Vera finds herself getting protective of you and treating your wounds often, you're too curious for your own good and she tells you such

- You're an asset to her now, your smarts are worth more than your human blood and... She's grown to love you so she gets you a place at spooky high to get even smarter and stay with her as her S/O

Aaravi:

- You were captured by a rouge group of monsters with access to the human realm via portals

- Humans are valuable, sell them as slaves, their parts and even just pure human blood can make them a lotta money

- While dungeoning Aaravi stumbles across your cell chamber and is horrified that there's actually an injured human in there! (For her this counts as a story quest, yus)

- Its a huge struggle to defeat the boss, the groups leader, get the key and save you from this dungeon

- Even though she looks more human than not, shes a half monster and still naturally stronger than you by a long shot plus all her training

- Hex questions you about how you got here, what snacks do you like, when did you last eat and it slowly devolves into talking about food as it usually does

-Outside the dungeon Aaravi takes you to the nearest body of water, tears some spare cloth and starts washing your face, arms and legs from blood and dirt, grumbling to herself

- inside all she can think about is her brother Salili and his possible condition at the hands of monsters

- your first question is about her eyes, you tell her how they're the brightest thing you've seen since your capture

- *Flustered slayer noises* "Is now really a time for talking about my fucking eyes?? I need details on what happened so I can destroy ALL of those bastards that hurt you!"

- shaking your head you just ask her where you can stay as you don't know how to get back home "with me, y-you can stay with me and Hex until we find a way to get you home"

- She rode you two back on this amazing Yellow bird thing, its like a mythical ostrich creature! And the feathers are so soft! The slayer is at least happy you're not too traumatized and tells you the birds name is Gretta and she got it from a slayer event

- Living with Aaravi was weird at first, she wouldn't let you do anything until she was certain you were healed up, its heartwarming. After that she wanted to start training you in basic defense!

- basic defense is more than physical but knowing your enemy, she explains the most common weaknesses of each monster type she can list and their weak spots, this is what has you enraptured with her lessons

- Eventually she can even take you on quests and show you her enchanted items, share her special potions and most importantly enjoy time together

- Even though the slayer isn't good with emotions she does tell you she like likes you after Hex more than Subtly hinted at it

- Dating after that was amazing for you both, and you get to see those pretty eyes in front of your face daily

[7-wonders]

Hey so i gotta plant this seed: Xavier actually lives and Y/N dies. Kinda like a trevor situation whwre he dosnt one abiut ghosts but comes back years later and is like "oh shit my girlfriend is still here". Fluffy, sad you decide. Just gotta give lots of love for a character I thought we'd see a lot more of x

Quick warning for mentions of suicide, as well as somebody dying and blood (y’know, the usual).

He has to do this.

Everybody, from his family to his friends (these people aren’t actually your friends, a voice in Xavier’s head reminds himself, your real friends are all dead), reminds him that this is not something he has to do. Xavier wants to argue with them, telling them about the “healing power of revisiting the site of trauma,” or whatever other accurate bullshit his shrink says, but he chooses instead to say that he wants to do this. And he does.

Xavier wants to do this, he needs to do it, but he’s fucking terrified nonetheless.

The closer that he gets to Camp Redwood, the more Xavier’s hands shake on the steering wheel. It’s two years to the day since the second massacre on those grounds, yet he still misses his trusty Vanta-C, which had been trashed that fateful night upon a failed escape attempt that was thwarted by one of the three serial killers roaming the grounds. He starts to think that he should have taken up one of the numerous offers to join him on his journey, but there’s no going back now.

He has to do this.

Refusing to acknowledge what had happened two years ago had done Xavier no good. He was irreversibly altered from what he had seen and experienced that summer evening, and ignoring what he had gone through only made the nightmares and flashbacks worse. Attending Brooke’s trial had been the first step towards healing, he had realized as he walked out of the courthouse feeling like a small weight was lifted off of his shoulders. He knew what needed to be done in order to achieve true closure, and so, Xavier Plympton vowed that he would return on the anniversary of the day that he was nearly murdered.

The day that you were murdered.

Xavier drums his fingers against the dashboard, staring at the carved ‘Camp Redwood’ sign that hangs above the entrance to the camp. His chest tightens with panic, and he nearly puts the car into reverse before reminding himself that he’s safe. Ramirez and Brooke were on Death Row, and Mr. Jingles was dead. There was nothing to harm him except for his own memories. 

Two years. 730 days. 17,520 hours. He’s kept track of the hours and days, although he hasn’t wanted to. No matter how the time is counted, Xavier steps into Camp Redwood for the first time in 729 days, 14 hours, 54 minutes, and 12 seconds.

The eerie quiet of the campground reminds Xavier of a cemetery, before he comes to the sobering realization that it basically is a cemetery. Although the bodies of his friends (of his love) may not be buried here, their last moments were spent here. The fear that they felt must linger on some level. Xavier’s not sure what he believes in, but emotions that powerful must leave a mark on physical places.

Xavier’s heart jumps into his throat when he sees certain landmarks that stand out in his short residence at the summer camp. The campfire, long-since put out, where he entranced his fellow counselors with the ghost tale of Mr. Jingles, all of them blissfully unaware that he truly was lurking in the nearby woods. The boys’ cabin, where he had shared a joint with you while listening to Chet complain about the Olympic games. The pit where Chet had been impaled. The clearing near the lake where Xavier held you as you took your last breaths.

The air forcibly leaves his lungs upon seeing the place you were last alive, the force of his emotion forcing him to his knees in the dirt. His mind begins to show him your final moments, and he squeezes his eyes shut while muttering that it was just a memory in the hopes that he wouldn’t fall into a flashback. The pull is too strong, and soon, he feels the chill of that night once more.

Xavier jumps out from the tree that he and Chet are hidden behind, Trevor staring triumphantly into the spiked pit where he had just pushed Mr. Jingles to his death.

“Holy shit dude, that was awesome!” Xavier exclaims, slapping Trevor’s outstretched hand. Trevor’s grin begins to slip, but before Xavier can question him, an ear-piercing scream sends his heart plunging into his stomach.

“(Y/N)!” He’s running as fast as his weary legs allow, following the heart-wrenching sound of your terror as he dodges tree branches and jumps over roots. He shouldn’t have left your side in the first place, but you had encouraged him to go when you heard Chet calling for help, assuring him with a smile that you would stay put and hidden. He had left you there, by the shores of the supposedly bottomless lake, and now he could only hope that you weren’t in danger.

When he reaches the clearing where he had last seen you, Xavier’s shoulders sag in relief. There’s no serial killers around, and he’s hopeful that you managed to scare them off and are still hiding. Those hopes are dashed when he hears a weak cough and sees you slumped against a tree.

“(Y/N).” Xavier can’t feel his legs as he falls beside you, your half-lidded eyes struggling to stay focused as you look at him. “No, no, no!” Blood shines on your hand in the moonlight, and he gingerly lifts your arm away from your abdomen to reveal a deep stab wound.

“Xav,” you rasp, bloody hand reaching up to stroke his cheek, “you came back.”

“Shh,” he soothes, ripping off his jacket and placing pressure on your wound. “You don’t need to talk, babe. Save your energy, okay? I’m going to get you out of here.”

Your glassy eyes stare widely at him. “It’s too late.”

“No, what are you talking about? I’m here, it’s not too late.” When you cough again, blood dribbling past your lips, Xavier realizes that you’re right.

“I’m cold,” you whimper, tears streaking down your face, “and I’m scared. I--I don’t want to die.”

He wants to reassure you that you’re not going to die, but he can already see the light in your eyes dimming. The only thing he can do now is comfort you, so he gathers you in his arms as if he’s going to carry you and holds you to him. “Here sweetheart, it’s okay. I’ve got you.”

“You need to get out of here, okay? Tell everyone what happened here tonight.”

“I will.” Your eyelashes flutter as water hits them, Xavier realizing that he’s crying.

“I’m sorry that we didn’t have more time, I--” more coughing cuts you off, a gurgling sound emanating from your chest.

“I know.” His eyes flicker up, and he laughs softly. “Look at the stars, (Y/N). Remember how you always complained about not being able to see the stars in the city, and that you would show me the constellations when we got here?”

You nod as your breathing becomes more shallow, yet you somehow manage to clutch Xavier closer to you.

“I did research on constellations, because I love you and I wanted to impress you.” He points up at a cluster of stars. “That one’s Orion. I only know that because you told me about his belt--”

You shudder against him, and Xavier looks down in horror as you take one last breath before the light fully leaves your eyes. The hand that was touching his cheek falls, landing in your lap. “(Y/N),” Xavier says hoarsely, shaking your body. “(Y/N)!”

“It’s not fair,” Xavier mutters, remembering your death in vivid detail. You were supposed to have so much time together. You’re the first relationship that’s ever made him consider settling down, and he was going to give it all up, the drugs and the partying and the casual sex, for you. Now, he has nothing. “It’s not fair!” Xavier yells up at the sky, pounding his fists against the ground.

“Stop, Xav. You’re going to hurt yourself.” The crooning of a soft voice that he hasn’t heard for two years stops him cold.

“You’re not real, this is just a figment of my imagination.”

A hand, warm and real, gently lifts his chin up, until Xavier’s staring into your eyes that are once again full of life. “That would probably be better than what this really is.”

“(Y/N),” he gasps, looking you over as if you’re going to disappear in front of him. Really, you don’t blame him. You look exactly the same as you did that horrible night, minus the stab wound and the blood. 

You laugh in delight as Xavier lunges forward, standing up with you wrapped tightly in his arms while he spins you around. After a year of wandering aimlessly and another year of deep, unending anger, this is a welcome change. 

“I’ve missed you,” Xavier cries into your hair, hands roaming up and down your body to confirm that you’re real. 

“I’ve missed you too, baby.” Although he looks a little different, more worn-down, he still smells the exact same. Irish Spring Soap, cinnamon gum, and a hint of marijuana. 

Xavier pulls away to look at you once more, still keeping a tight grip on you. “How are you--I saw you die! How are you alive?”

“Baby,” you smile sadly, “I’m not.”

“But you’re here.”

“We’re ghosts. Everybody who died here is trapped here. I don’t know why, or how, but we’re still here.”

“If you’re a ghost, why didn’t you come find me?”

You start crying now, and Xavier holds you to his chest once more. “I tried, Xav, I promise. I spent a month trying to figure a way out of this fucking place, but we can’t leave. We’re physically tied to these grounds.”

“It’s okay, I don’t blame you.” As Xavier sits there, finally feeling complete once more, he realizes what must be done. He hasn’t felt this happy for two years, and he’ll never feel whole if he’s missing half of his heart. 

He has to do this.

“I want to stay here, with you,” Xavier says.

“You can’t. I won’t let you stay, this place has a way of affecting the living.” Xavier remains silent, instead pulling a knife out of his backpack to show you what he means. “Xavier, no!”

“(Y/N), I can’t live without you. These past two years have left me a shell of a man. I finally have you back, and I won’t be able to go on if I know you’re here.”

“I won’t let you k--” you cut yourself off with a sob, slapping your hand over your mouth. “I won’t let you do this to yourself.”

“Don’t you want to be together?”

“Of course I do! But you have a life to live.”

Xavier shakes his head. “Life’s not worth living if you’re not in it.”

Closing your eyes, you remain silent for a minute before finally nodding. “I can’t stop you from what you want to do. If this is what you want...”

“I have to do this.” Your eyes glisten with tears, and you kiss his forehead. “Does...does dying hurt?”

“Only for a moment. Then, you’re just cold. There’s nothing, and suddenly, there’s something. It’s like falling to sleep.”

He nods, turning the knife around so the blade is facing his abdomen. As he looks down, he realizes that his hands have stopped shaking for the first time since the massacre. 

“I’ll see you on the other side, (Y/N).” Xavier’s lips meet yours as he pushes the knife into his stomach, ending his life while simultaneously starting an eternity together with you.

[slytherin-team]

I thought it would just be easier to put this in it’s own post - some bullet points for why I unironically ship Snape and Petunia:

- the potential set-up is irresistible! Also, who wasn’t shocked when it was revealed that Snape and Petunia of all characters knew each other as kids?! I see Snape as an ultimately good person. I can’t say the same for adult Petunia but I have a lot of sympathy for child Petunia, and frankly I think adult Petunia should have been written more grey and nuanced like Snape. The Dursleys overall were a little too cartoonish and bland. It’s been said that “there’s more to Petunia’s character than meets the eye,” and that should have been shown more.

- speaking of the potential set-up - it allows for so many avenues to explore in fanfic! For example, stories where teen Petunia and teen Severus get together in Cokeworth, or the two of them coming together as adults, or stories of them raising Harry together instead of Petunia and Vernon, etc. Like there’s just so many different ways it could happen and it could range from a really, positive enlightening relationship to a really toxic or torrid love affair, and all of those could be great and interesting stories.

- we don’t get any on-screen muggle/wizard romances and that would have been interesting. I also like the idea of Petunia being with a wizard and feeling more included in the magical world and I like Severus with a muggle, maybe living a quiet life away from all the death eater stuff, kinda returning to the muggle world but in a new, positive way

- Petunia and Snape are both extremely insecure as kids/teens. Petunia never feels good enough compared to Lily and Severus never feels good enough compared to wealthy pure-bloods like James Potter. Petunia claims that her parents neglected her and favored Lily. Severus was neglected by his parents (my personal headcanon is that his mother loved him but was so beaten down by Tobias’s abuse that her health and state of mind prevented her from being a good mother). Petunia and Snape look down on each other when they meet, but actually they have more in common than Snape and Lily. Petunia can probably understand him better than someone popular and loved like Lily.

- In the movie Snape has that line about Petunia being jealous because Lily is special and she’s ordinary. This gets at the heart of Petunia’s insecurities. But here’s the thing - Snape and Petunia, who both feel that they’re not special- could be special to each other. Snape is attracted to power because he wants to be in control and not weak, which leads him down a dark path. He didn’t need the death eater stuff - he needed someone he could confide in. I always imagine him as domestic and a homebody at heart - just brewing potions in his basement or reading books in his armchair. He wants to regain a sense of control over his life but he doesn’t seek prestige to the same degree as Lucius Malfoy and has nothing but contempt for showy people like Lockhart. Petunia is also very domestic. I like the idea of her cooking and humming to herself while Snape brews his potions.

- they both suffered a lot in their youth and I just wish both of them could be happy as adults. They’re two of the most bitter, regretful characters in the series and I’m a sucker for shipping two bitter assholes together and seeing them bring each other joy lol

- They both found James Potter to be arrogant and off-putting and nothing brings two people together like the hatred of a third party.

- Again, I like how it’s easy to imagine them in a secure, happy, domestic partnership or in a really fucked up torrid affair. There’s not a huge amount of fanfic about these two but of the ones I’ve found, writers usually create either something really romantic between them, where they come together and are special to each other, or something really toxic that makes for a terrible relationship but very fun reading

- Pride & Prejudice/ “the folly of first impressions” - if you like this sort of thing, well then, you can see how this ship is appealing I’m sure

- I love it when two characters seem like opposites on the surface (Snape is greasy, unkempt, a wizard, has dark hair and dark eyes, meanwhile Petunia is neat, clean, a muggle, has blonde hair and blue eyes) but are actually really similar (both of them are precise, have a lot of pride, hurt the ones they love in order to protect their own egos, seem to love the home and the hearth, take pride in their work, have a complicated relationship with Lily, Petunia feels she’s not as good as Lily, Severus feels like he’s not good enough for Lily, are spiteful, in the DH memory scenes, they are both shown to spy and snoop around a lot, they grew up in the same town, etc)

- I love Snape and Lily as friends but I have never been a snily shipper. I don’t see them as compatible in that way. Also, I’m personally not a fan of friends -to -lovers, give me enemies-to-friends-to-lovers over the former any day.

- If any atla fans are reading this - I ship Zutara, not Kataang, so this might explain a lot as well.

- the potential Snape and Petunia romance just has so many classic elements. the folly of first impressions/ pride & prejudice thing mentioned above, two misunderstood people coming together, or two people who misunderstand each other at first then come together later, the romeo and juliet potential because of the war, etc.

- They remind me of Xellos and Filia from the anime Slayers, which was the first enemies-to-friends-to-lovers ship I really fell in love with, and they even physically resemble these two as well. Filia is a prim and proper blonde, always drinking tea and acting self-righteous. Xellos has long hair that falls into his eyes and is thought to be evil by nature yet we only see him do good in the series. Although he has a sharp tongue. This relationship is not canon either and never comes to fruition in the series but it’s heavily hinted at.

- it’s super corny and cliche but I love the whole beauty and the beast parallel, and also the hades/persephone vibe that this ship evokes

- If Petunia was a witch - she’d totally be a slytherin and I have legitimate reasons for this that have nothing to do with her being a “villain” character. Self-preservation and protecting the in-group while being cautious of outsiders are important slytherin qualities. The defensive, on-guard way Petunia acts when Snape first appears, shows her being protective of her little sister. The snobbery she exudes is reminiscent of Narcissa’s Malfoy’s snobbery, looking down on outsiders to protect or maintain the in-group basically. Petunia’s pride and the way she protects it, insisting she really didn’t want to go to Hogwarts after all, shows that self-preservation and preservation of her dignity are important to her. Pride, pride, pride! We see this in how she painstakingly tends to her home and family as well. She always wants to make a good impression and be the best.

- Nothing against Dramoine shippers but I’m not a fan of that ship. I don’t like putting the racist bully with the person he’s racist towards. Okay, so then why Snape and Petunia? Petunia can pretend to hate magic all she wants because of her jealousy but at the end of the day, she’s Lily’s sister and has magical heritage even if she’s not a witch herself. Likewise, Snape can call people with muggle parents “mudbloods” all he wants but that doesn’t change the fact that he himself has a muggle parent and literally wouldn’t exist if not for that muggle parent, as awful as he is. So, this is different to me from a pureblood supremacist and a muggleborn or muggle romance, because I don’t see either Snape or Petunia as racist, but rather, as self-loathing, and while it may not be healthy, I’m a sucker for pairing two self-loathing characters together. Also, I think character growth for both of them requires accepting the two worlds - muggle and magical- and their relation to them, and I feel like being together could keep them from going down dark paths (with Severus, Petunia can stop resenting the magical world and feel more included in it, and with Petunia, Severus can appreciate the muggle world and stop seeing every muggle as his awful father)

I can’t believe I just wrote all of this but I’m super into this ship recently and have a lot to word vomit about it. enjoy.

[popculturebuffet]

Animation Reviews: OK KO: Red Action 3: Grudgement Day

Whelp I said i’d do all three in one day and I MEANT IT. And I may do it again just to stay on schedule in the future, but for now i’m just proud and exausted to have gotten this done. And after a rather “eh it has some things but it’s mostly just there” episode” we’ve come to our last episode and my personal faviorite, Red Action 3: Grudgment day. Also as a quick note I forgot red was actually a major part of “I hope this thing flies” back in my first review, but I probably would’ve left it out as while the plot is her racing with Rad, it’s entirely a rad episode, and like plaza prom which I had to realize wasn’t important, isn’t really necessary.  One last where we are in the series thing. We’re in season 3 and as I mentioned last time, RIGHT before the final episodes and one episode before the three part final arc and unrelated but beautiful epilogue that closes out the series. I didn’t go into my throughts on season 2 but it was good, the ending was just a  really sloppy end to an otherwise good arc that i’ll get to. Season 3 is somehow even better, using it’s shorter run time to tie up loose ends and character arcs left and right and , after trying all series to do it, crossing over with Sonic the hedgehog, another thing for another time, and the final episodes, both the wrap up to the story arc “Let’s fight ot the end” and the wonderful where are they now epilouge “Thank you for watching the show”, are absolutley amazing and how you end a show.. and thankfully endings of this calibur became the trend this year given that same year star vs ended terribly and the bad taste is still in my mouth over that one but that’s a story for another bunch of reviews. The point is as I said the crew used the time wisely and wrapped up most ongoing character and story arcs that needed resolution. And given they spent two episodes on it the team decided to pull the pin on red and enid getting together, and solve one dangling issue the fans likely had all in one go. IT’s grudgment day under the cut. 

We open with Rad and Red arguging and KO looking at them in a way that just screams:”Third mom, Rad, please stop fighting”  Enid comes in and wonders why one of her two best friends and her girlfriend are fighting. She dosen’t use the term but given the kiss at the end of the episode, more on that when we get to it, the general way Enid acts about this and the way Red acts around her this ep.. their a couple at this point.  I do wish they had an episode of them becoming offical, adressing Enid and Elodie.. bucnhes of other things but I concede that the crew was blindsighted by having a smaller season and had they you know NOT BEEN CANCELED FOR NO GOOD GOODAMN RESAON, we might have gotten more renid and more stories and a full on steven universe crossover with both sides. But I digress.. CN’s managment is terrible right now... but that’s not the reason for this article so we’re moving on.  Anyways Enid wants to know why their so pissy when she arrives, and Red .. is in the right this time. Showing her growth while she still got heated with rad.

Rad did at least start it, as she simply came in to take enid jelly surfing and was kind enough to ask him to come along.. and KO implictly given he’s there and their buds now and all that. But when rad insults her again she quits the explaning and goes right back to arguing with him while Enid and KO look on awkwardly. Then Red decides to go into a mocking impression of rad, which is not NEARLY as mean as it could’ve been given the guy has canocially, had a super virus get worse because he refused to get rest something the villian that gave it to him was COUNTING on as part of his evil scheme, was left on the floor in pain over his cocoa being too hot, and once confused his 6-11 year old friend for a doppleganger despite having GIVEN said friend his nametag, though to be fair red’s own best friend also thought he was rad and gave him her number, so everyone was kind of dumb that day but still, the point is she has a LOT of ammo. In contrast Rad STARTS light saying she says words like Cowabunga (she only does once at the end of this ep and has not at any time).. before saying Enid deserves someone better and flinging her surfboard... which Crinkly Wrinkly jumps on and crashes into a wall because of course he does.  Anyways Enid is offended at this and reveals rad’s been acting like a raving dickhead to Red anytime she shows up, which were this season 1 would be on brand but after 3 seasons of becoming a better person and an episode earlier this season where he rejected his dudebro friends once and for all, who by the way: Beefer and Mega Football Baby are the worst and I hate them and i’m greatful that their final apperance is rad realizing what a bad influence they’ve been and telling their asses off for their toxic masculinity. But I will however give OK KO credit as their SUPPOSED to be obnoxious, and the crew still dialed back hteir apperances to almost nothing when they realized it went horribly right, versus Rusty whose still mildly to massively annoying, but has yet to be fixed or removed from LIncoln’s crew, despite the show having a good track record for taking problematic characters and fixing them. And i’ve gotten entirely offf topic because all three of them piss me off so much, so let’s move on.  Where were we.. ah yes, since Rad being a dickhead this consisently is now an exception not the rule, Enid rightfully demands to know why and Rad.. makes up two very petty, weak and obviously pulled out of his butt to try and cover the real reason up reasons for his actions: Red didn’t follow him back on Social Media, which is both a website and what the website is in this universe apparently which Is brilliant, and that she took the last bit of cake at prom... you know after he realized he was screwing it up and fixed it all with a homoerotic dance fight. Plaza Prom is amazing. When pressed because Rad fired his stupid friends, Rad hastily challenges red to a power battle, which I haven’t had to cover yet: Basically a hero can challenge another hero to a fight, usually for respect, to settle a grudge or who took the last bagle, and it’s a socially accepted thing called a power batttle. Really given it seems like KO’s world has not had a hero civil war, and the one time we’ve seen heroes on heroes outside of these things has been when POINT was acting shady as fuck and thus needed to be stopped, it seems like a resonable mesure, especially since most heroes just.. shrug off damage from battles and stuff after a bit.  Unable to convince her girlfriend not to punch her best friend in the face, however much he deserves it, Red gives enid her belt with her time capusles inside, so they don’t go off mid fight and gives her an air kiss. Awww. Enid bemoans the fact this is happening for such dumb reasons when KO relaizes they can just use the belt to fix what once went wrong and end this petty fight before rad dies.  First stop, the Bodega a few months ago, which KO proves both by the fact they have mean beans, which theys topped selling months ago and is one of the single best refrences this show did and it’s done a LOT, and the social media feed being from months and months ago, with Beefer bragging elodie beat him up. Ewwwwww.... I don’t wnat to kjnow what he’s into. Gah gotta scrub my brain. ONe brain scrub later Rad needs only one more follower to 100. I hear when you get 100 this happens. 

Rad asks for a follow for follow from Red, who says she dosen’t have her phone. Enid is sure she’s lying, which she is, and follows Rad for her. Also I love rad’s file photo

Seriously they use this any time they need a picture of him. It’s one of the series best runners and is only topped by homer simpsons various terrible ones and this gravity falls masterpiece as being the best stock photo used for a character.

I will use this any time I have an excuse to and I have no shame about that. Anyways they go back but

As things have only gotten more heated at the power battle, so they try the prom to see if that’ll help.  Cue PROM. Seriously why they never did a second Plaza Prom episode is really beyond me. Lot of potetinal with that concept.. plus I like episodes that put tons of cast, main and supporting, in one event together, ever since venture bros. It’s always a fun time. Anyways, Enid wants to stop a paradox but KO has already interacted with his past self.. which is the KO enid’s talking to and a great gag.  So the two seeing Rad and Red both about to go for the cake decide to pull a destraction: Enid goes over and talks to Red to hold her off and get the cake to rad, while KO does what any sane person would do: Jumps onto Rad’s face while yelling rad I love you, and Rad is clearly more annoyed he’s on his face and this has very obviously happened before. .... I miss this show.  Anyway after giving the explination that she’s a shadow clone to explain why her past self is still up there DJing, she offers to dance and the two have a good cute time until enid gets the cake into rad’s mouth and bolts.. and now we get the thing I hinted at earlier. Red talks to the other Alley Teens about it, and notes that while she dosen’t know Enid she kinda likes her.. then backpedals as the teens make faces but are clearly not fooled by they all look really creepy especially Gregg. 

WHelp I have ny nightamres for tonight. But yeah this is implied to be what got Red to ask her out in the first place. Time travel is weird and inconsietent. This does give me a chance to adress the fact that the alley teens.. sorta stopped beiing a thing eventually. I mean their stillf riends as of the season 2 openoer but red and drupe show up for their own eps or supportingroles while Gregg just kinda vanishes, poor person. That being said given this interaction and how close they were I DO think their still friends; I mean gregg and drupe was confirmed by the flash forward as they visit rad’s cafe, but Red would still be their friend, they just all likely have more stuff to do as they grow older: by the end of season 2 Drupe has a buisness and gregg is probably in college. But I expect Drupe would be Red’s best woman at her wedding. I mean gregg would probably be her best person but still. Anyways they return to the present again and.

Yeah that. Their now battling in cars and Enid decides to cut the bullshit and just ask Rad why he’s pissed at Red, asking Red to pause the fight, which she agrees to.  KO and Enid throw rad int he back of his van tied up and ask him to be honest about why he’s so pissed off. After some dithering he says he lo.. lo.. and instead of saying he loves enid, thank god i’m so sick of love triangles, may they die in a fire, like the episode hinted at it’s a swerve. and unlike a vince russo swerve which ends in A “Buff Bagwell’s mother on a forklift match”.. no really

This is actually a great one: Rad’s fully moved on and I like that, evne if the finale does leave it vauge if those bodegamen at the end are theirs or not, given Rad’s her best friend by the end and she and red would need a surrogate, it’s not a huge stretch to say Rad sperm donored for them and is still a beloved uncle and figure in their lives. Anyways the point is Rad’s real beef is.. suprisingly sweet. Turns out Rad’s still pissed at the whole “Teens humilating, burning and spanking” ko thing and Red posting it online. Which is likely to adress the fact they.. never adressed that and was a good call and a good way to show rad’s growth: he’s not jealous , he’s not mad she’s taking up enid’s time, he’s mad that his best friend is dating someone who beat up his other best friend for just trying to help them then put it online for a cruel laugh. Granted Drupe did the same thing and he not only danced with her but is on good terms with her to this day, but odds are given they see her more and she’s in fact the designer for their mission outfits in season 3, she probably apologized off screen while Red figured KO forgiving her was good enough and just wanted to forget it, running away from things as usual. IT speaks to the diffrence in their personality: Red runs hot is stubborn and takes time to admit she’s wrong, Drupe is very chill and as the series goes on very nice, and probably wanted to get it out of the way asap given she frequents the bodega more often, either in the background or foreground.  Anyways after KO reveals he actually enjoys the video as a treasured memory of when he first met the alley teens, disturbing his friends, seriously this kid needed to remerge with his edgelord side yikes, Enid gives rad a headpat and kudos for being normal and Enid decides to take all of them to go fix this.  Back in the past we’re back at the bullying and before past red can post, present red explains she should stop and after clarfying this isn’t an end of the world situation, not an unfair assumption given you know time traveler, she reveals it’s for someone unimportant.. but whose important to someone they care about, and that what they were doing was a terrible thing they’ll be ashamed of anyway. It’s a good scene that shows how far red’s come: from pushing everyone but two people awaya nd treating most like garbage in a vain attempt to avoid being who she used to be, to accepting it, finding love, and becoming friends with someone she hurt and accepting she hurt him. Rad is also clearly moved seeing that Enid did indeed choose wisely. Back in the present. 

... NO not this time. No instead red and rad are pals, talking about how shredded they are and what not, and while Enid finds it annoying, understandably, she’s glad their not trying to kill each other and dosen’t have to buy Rad’s gravestone or visit her girlfriend in prison. In the alterted timeline, which their also aware of by rad’s comment, time travel just go with it, they were already planning on going jelly surfing and invite enid, and implictly ko along. 

So we end on our main trio and Red jelly surfing, Enid and Red sharing a board before wiping out, laughing about it and then, as if you hadn’t already seen the header but fuck it. 

Yup. The subtext just became.. text. Awww. In case you were wondering, I do like them as a couple, especially after this quintology, as it’s made me realize just hwo much they click and how much chemistry they have, and by this point their just adorable, their drama gone and they can just be happy and gay together. And that’s something cartoons are doing more of and tha’ts wonderful and it’s wonderful that, with all else he had to wrap up, Ian felt confirming the gay couples lasted was extremley important, as two others are shown married in the finale. And we’ll get to the finale more in a bit, but first Rad floats by with an “I support this”, to approving smiles, and enid thinking he’s a weirdo. Also I love the meta text of having a character voiced by the shows creator say that.  KO however is sad that the video is gone but ENid says the memories will last. Rad is understandably not sad about it suggests they make new ones and we end on our quintent taking a selfie together. THE END. Before final thoughts, this wouldn’t however be the last we saw of them. The finale has a bit more as it flashes forwards a bit: the relevant part is one shows Enid take over KO’s mom Carol’s dojo. with red, the two kissing again and alllooking over some supsciously familiar kids who look supsciously like the hue troop, but are probably there great grandparents. While Red dosent’ show up again after that, and could’ve gone back to the future eventuallyf or all we know, I like to think she stayed, and that as noted above, she and enid had kids together with Rad’s help given the similar looking kids we see running the bodega... which admitely was kept vauge by Ian on purpose so fans could draw their own inclusion so that’s the one i’m drawing; rad is still there for them aand still family to them, but isn’t with Enid in a romantic sense, if you think diffrently that’s fine. But My ending is these two crazy kids worked it out and are now happy ever after. and that ain’t bad.  Final Thoughts: A fantastic episode with TONS of great jokes, call backs and a great resolution , showing off Rad and Red’s character development greatly,f ixing a possible plot hole and giving fans the kiss that many of them had wanted for some time. ONe of the series best I can’t gush enough about it but I shall stop for your benifit. If you liked this review, subscribe for more, check out the backlog via the convient pages on my blog, and shoot me an ask, wether it’s to suggst an episode or just to ask me about my opinons or yell about them or ask what I think about certain shows or what i’ll cover. And until next time, later days. 

[basil-films]

08-06-2020

Silence of the Lambs (1991)

i could cry tears of joy with this movie. it’s beyond anything i could’ve expected and more. the relationship between Clarice and Dr Lecter is peculiar to say the very least and i’d love to spit out some ideas about it on here.

A Climb to Success

we open to a scene of Clarice running up a hill, as a part of her completion of an obstacle course. throughout the film, we see her struggle to make it as a female FBI agent (trainee) amongst a sea of (literally) huge men. sexism quite obviously plays a part here, but so does Jodie Foster’s petit figure and 1.61m height - adorable. i highly doubt they would’ve been able to find a better Clarice for the part.

as an opening to the film, the physical expression of struggle in her face is absolutely perfect, cause it really perfectly sets the scene and hints at the difficult journey to FBI-ism for a woman in the 90′s.

Eye Contact

if you take a minute to notice the number of times men we deem to be in a higher position of authority than Clarice choose to make direct eye contact with the ‘camera.’ this is a slightly more indirect way of asserting dominance in a situation, as eye contact, regardless of if it’s in a film or in person, shows self confidence and determination. i forget his name, but Clarice’s boss was the first example i picked up. he would often enough only address Clarice through the lens of the camera, almost as if he’s dumbing this down for her and using eye contact as a way of checking she understands what he’s saying. this is kinda like the way a teacher will look at you when they’re explaining something for the third time and really slowing down for you. the fact that this only really happens with men in a higher ranking position within the FBI and Hannibal, goes to show that Hannibal, despite being a serial killer, is still a man worthy of respect, at least to Clarice.

alongside that, the eye contact suggests the story is being told from Clarice’s perspective and that everybody is talk to her.

The Big Bad Wolf

this is probably a stretch but hear me out:

HANNIBAL: May I see your credentials? Closer...closer.

this INSTANTLY reminded me of the Little Red Riding Hood story. at this point in the film, Hannibal is nothing but a mysterious figure to Clarice, so when he said this particular line while questioning her qualifications, my mind chose to connect it to the wolf from the big bad wolf from LRRH. personally, i think this is a pretty fair similarity and i’m convinced of its validity cause just think about it: as far as she’s concerned, he may as well eat her up, just like the wolf would’ve.

“Memory, Agent Starling, is what I have instead of a view.”

the one line that almost makes you feel some kind of pity towards face-eating Dr Lecter is this one. i say “almost” cause i don’t know you and you might still not care even after this, but i think it’s safe to assume it makes you feel something. the only thing Hannibal ever mentions wanting is a view to reference when drawing, instead of relying on a combination of his imagination and memory. all the man wants is a view, not even freedom, just a way of having a view. this seems to be his only weakness, as agent Starling later uses it to her advantage to bribe him into giving her more information, something that only just got past him since he is easily the most intelligent of all the characters.

HANNIBAL: Memory, agent Starling, is what i have instead of a view.

A Dangerous Game of Patience

this is another minor point, but i couldn’t help but notice how one of the most dangerous aspects of Hannibal’s personality is his patience. he’s been in that one room for so long at this point that he really has nothing else to lose. he plays this game of patience with Clarice as he reveals more and more about Buffalo Bill, almost as if he finds the situation amusing and like a good pastime. another memorable quote from Hannibal reads: “how much are you willing to wait?” absolutely terrifying, can you imagine a serial killer saying that to you? *shudders*

A Student // Teacher Relationship

an interesting perspective to look at Clarice’s relationship with Hannibal is the whole “student // teacher” exchange kinda way. in exchange for his (knowledge on Buffalo Bill and) wisdom, Clarice gives him something he wants, whether that be personal details about herself or a “view.” this exchange is noteworthy, as it’s the singular thing that makes an FBI trainee and a deadly face-eating dude equals.

it’s really interesting to watch their relationship unfold, especially while this remains the one consistent element throughout. everything else seems to be pretty unpredictable, can’t lie - but their student // teacher exchange is established from the beginning and doesn’t seem to change from start to finish.

The Pen of Intelligence

quite possibly one of the best scenes showcasing Hannibal’s character, the way he eyeballs the pen during his potential transfer really says it all and i love love love this scene for it. we never really know what’s going on in Dr Lecter’s head; however, his intentions were always clear. when he looks at the pen with such curiosity (yet determination), we suspect another brilliantly executed masterplan to take place. we were right. the way a man that’s quite literally being treated like a dangerous animal with his mouthguard and chains manages to plan his escape for a scenario he doesn’t even definitively know will take place is just another reminder of his intelligence. the pen is a symbol of this, with it’s basic appearance we don’t really suspect much of it, later finding out we really underestimated its capabilities - just like Hannibal. Dr Lecter is like a freckin pen and i love it.

Silence of the “Lambs”

the lamb story from Clarice is quite obviously where the title of the movie came from, but what does it mean?

first of all, the fact that the lamb story is one of the personal details Clarice is forced to reveal to Dr Lecter, despite being thoroughly warned ahead of time to refrain from mentioning anything personal, is a reminder of their peculiar relationship. think about it. isn’t it weird that one of the smartest people, let alone a woman *gasp*, decided to ignore all warnings and form a personal relationship with a face-eater? yeah, thought so. the personalness (i googled it that is in fact a real word) of the story is a direct reminder of their close relationship and is what makes the storyline that much more interesting.

now a closer look at the actual story behind the lambs. i’m not too sure if what i’m about to say makes any sense but this was my thought process: the lambs that were being ‘silenced’ via murder, symbolically represent the women being killed, and therefore also silenced, by Bill. while Hannibal and Clarice’s ever-developing relationship is a major part of the storyline, without the case regarding Buffalo Bill, it would all be nothing. the title is a direct reference to Bill’s torturous intentions.

another more literal side to the title comes from the whole ‘shearing women’s skin to make clothing,’ as one would with a lamb or a sheep. the women are just like the sheep, getting sheared for their ‘wool.’ hilarious right? it really is though. in fact, during her raid of Bill’s house, Clarice yells at the woman in the ditch(?) to shut up so she hunt down Bill before trying to help anybody else. this is her silencing the lamb.

Insecurity

one of the most important aspects of the entire film, yet the one i understood the least, was the root of Bill’s intentions with his skinning. on one hand, he’s a psychopath and literally one of the most damaged characters you’ll ever hear of in your life, fictional or real. on the other hand, there is a root cause of all this: insecurity (mixed with a bucketload of mental illness). Bill’s identity crisis and fragile relationship with his femininity is what leads him to literally strip women of their womanhood and keep it for himself. one of the few instances we see Bill expressing actual human emotion is when he was looking down at the girl he had trapped in his home and starts crying as she begs him to free her. Bill saw something in the girl that he presumably sees in himself, which is why the whole encounter was interestingly uncomfortable for him, despite being a serial killer. this all boils down to his insecurity with himself and is probably the root of all his problems.

Bill’s Green Goggles

one final point about Bill (as he’s easily my least favorite character in all this, what a psycho), has to do with his goggles. while he was scoping out his next victim AND trying to hunt down Clarice in the dark after she broke into his little messed up dungeon, he uses these green night vision goggles. yes, the green is merely a coincidence as most night vision goggles have this lens color; however, it’s worth noting the psychological side of this too. in films, most people automatically associate the color green with perseverance and envy. the only times Bill uses these goggles are quietly obviously to see in the dark, but these two occurrences also happen to be when he is at his most animal-like. he wants what the girls have, both physically and ‘socially.’ he wants their skins but he also wants their femininity and womanhood, something he clearly lacks. he envies them and the bright green of the goggles is a constant reminder of this insecurity.

[murasaki-murasame]

A whole buncha shit went down in Chapter 12 today and we got a new Chimera fight to begin shaking up the shadow meta in preparation for the new mana spiral batch and the new Agito fight, but like 90% of my brainpower is currently being spent thinking about how the new influx of wyrmite rewards let me do another tenfold on the Valentine’s banner, which finally got me Epimetheus.

But I still have some thoughts on the new chapter so I’m gonna put them under a cut because of spoilers

I’m feeling extremely vindicated in my choice to dream summon Laranoa, since chapter 12 ended up having flame enemies, and she even showed up in the story, which is like the last thing I saw coming.

Even though my water team is probably my weakest one overall, I didn’t actually have too much difficulty with anything up until the last couple of Very Hard battles, which I wasn’t able to do, and probably won’t be able to for a while.

I still think that the higher difficulty main campaign maps are really fun and well-balanced, though. It’s pretty rare to get challenging content based around dealing with waves of mob enemies. It really forces you to play differently, especially in Very Hard where every enemy hits super hard.

And on the note of the main bosses in the chapter, I’m still wondering if the whole deal with the cube bosses is actually gonna lead somewhere. Thus far they’re just this giant question-mark with no real in-universe explanation or acknowledgement, and their whole sci-fi vibe and the cryptic references to space probes just feels like the exact opposite of how the rest of the game is. It’s possible that they’re just there to be challenging boss fights with no real context behind them, but I kinda hope something happens with them. Maybe once we’ve gotten one for each element.

Story-wise this chapter was shorter and a bit less eventful than I expected, but it was still really fun. It really feels like things are heating up now. Especially with how it ended, it really feels like the first half of a two-chapter story arc, so that’s probably why it felt kinda brief. It definitely raised a lot of interesting questions that’ll probably get addressed in the next chapter.

First of all, the big elephant in the room is the reveal that apparently we’re going to see the fifth heir in the next chapter, which just kinda came out of nowhere, lol. I really thought they’d be a mystery for longer than this.

It’s not like there’s anything to go on one way or another, but I kinda hope that the fifth heir is that wyrmclan leader we saw that looks a whole lot like Euden. But who knows.

They’re still a huge mystery, but the stuff with Phares in this chapter makes me think that the fifth heir is somehow involved in the whole concept of black mana and how it corrupts dragons, if we’re meant to assume that Phares showing up with the void dragons at the end of the chapter was related to him getting help from the fifth heir. Which might explain why Chelle and Leonidas seemed genuinely freaked out at the idea of Phares working with their mystery sibling. I don’t think the idea of black mana has been introduced or explored at all outside of the descriptions of the void bosses, so it’ll be cool if it gets properly explored soon.

And on that note, I really wasn’t expecting this chapter to provide an actual in-universe explanation for stuff like the void dragons and the IO bosses. It’s not a huge deal, but it’s nice that the void dragons aren’t just in their own little weird pocket of ambiguous canon.

It’s kinda weird to see the main story basically introduce the concept of void battles when those have been in the game forever, but it’s nice to see them finally addressing it, lol.

The whole deal with Leonidas talking about ‘dracoshifting’ is also totally a hint at a future game mechanic, isn’t it? People have been wondering for a while now if there’s going to be some sort of revamp to dragons as a mechanic to basically rebalance them according to the current needs of the endgame meta, and I could totally see some variation of what Leonidas did to Mars being used to explain a new mechanic about buffing existing dragons. I imagine that if we get to do it, we’d do it in a more humane way than Leonidas, but still.

I’ve been thinking ever since they introduced mana spirals for adventurers that dragons should probably get something like that to make them better, and I could see this basically being how they do it. I dunno exactly how they’d do it, but maybe it’ll be like promoting dragons to make them stronger and giving them a new sci-fi design like Mars has. There’s definitely a lot of old dragons that need some sort of buff to make them more relevant. I’d want it to be slowly rolled out for specific dragons that need it, though, like with mana spirals.

Mainly I think that the 60% strength dragons probably need a buff since we’re starting to get conditional 80% strength dragons, but there’s also other relatively weak 5-star dragons like Prometheus, Takemikazuchi, Nidhogg, etc, that could use a buff.

This also might be a good way for them to make it worthwhile to actually be shapeshifted for a while, instead of just using the dragon to use a single skill or to tank a hit. At the moment they’re basically all weaker than if you weren’t shapeshifted, but maybe this sort of buff would also lead to their shapeshifted forms being way better. Which would at least be great for characters like Xainfried, Mym, Lathna, etc.

I’m also kinda wondering now if this chapter might be setting up for Leonidas joining us and being playable eventually. It kinda feels like that’s what they’re setting up, but honestly I kinda hate all of Euden’s siblings and I don’t really want to see any of them become our allies, lol. Also Leonidas would probably just be a flame sword, and we really don’t need more of them.

On a similar note I think it’s pretty safe to say that we’re probably getting Gala Alex next month. I dunno if I’ll go out of my way to save for her, but we’ll see. I’m curious to see what her gala alt would play like, though, especially if she’s still a shadow unit. There’s just a whole lot of competition in shadow at the moment. Either way, I think she’ll probably end up being a sword. Shadow doesn’t really have any noteworthy sword units at the moment, so that’d be nice.

Once we get into March I might start saving for her, but for now I’m probably gonna put some resources into the new dragon banner, since all of the featured ones really interest me [especially Apollo since I don’t have him yet], and I just got Epimetheus so now I’m done with the Valentine’s banner.

That also reminds me that at this point it’s basically confirmed that both Epimetheus and the three old Valentine’s adventurers are permanent now, which is really interesting. I guess this means that later this year they’ll make the old Halloween and Christmas units permanent, too. That’d be a nice way to keep introducing new holiday units without it getting bloated and hard to manage. And honestly most of the older holiday units aren’t particularly good anymore, so there’s no real harm in making them permanent. RIP in pieces to all the people who whaled for V-Hilde, though, lol. Maybe now that she’s permanent she has a chance of getting a mana spiral to make her better.

Anyway, I’ve felt a little let down by some of the recent story chapters, but I ended up really liking this one. Now I’m excited to see what reveals and developments the next chapter brings.

I’m also still extremely hyped about the upcoming shadow mana spiral batch, and the new Agito fight. I’m still clinging onto my pipe dream wish of them improving Norwin by making him more like V-Addis or Natalie. I’ve actually been thinking some more about the different ways that could go [even after I made a whole post about it lmao], and I think it’d be interesting if in addition to adding an enmity effect to his S1, they added an effect to his S2 where he takes non-lethal damage relative to the amount of damage he does to the enemy with the skill, as a way to manually get him down to low health. So I guess in that case he’d be more like a shadow version of Chelsea, which could be fun. I also think there’s a lot of interesting things they could do with him by, say, adding a team health regen effect to his Blind = Team Strength ability. But who knows. I just want him to get some special attention and become genuinely good because I really love him, lol. Though in general I like the idea of them using mana spiral upgrades to basically give certain characters a whole different play-style. Sorta like how Karl can now be used more or less as a buffer, but that has more to do with D-Rathalos than Karl’s mana spiral. It’s still an interesting way to give older units a niche in the meta.

[commentaryvorg]

Danganronpa V3 Commentary: Part 5.23

Be aware that this is not a blind playthrough! This will contain spoilers for the entire game, regardless of the part of the game I’m commenting on. A major focus of this commentary is to talk about all of the hints and foreshadowing of events that are going to happen and facts that are going to be revealed in the future of the story. It is emphatically not intended for someone experiencing the game for their first time.

Last time as we continued the explanations in the conclusion of trial 5, Kaito made it clear that he’d have done this plan even without Maki being a factor, Kokichi did have a reason for making Kaito and not Shuichi his accomplice but it was still a stupid decision, Kaito finally admitted he’s dying with a huge smile on his face and was never going to be any less inspiring if they knew that, didn’t tell them that he did this to be a hero because he didn’t need to, reassured Shuichi that him uncovering the truth was awesome and that the plan still kinda succeeded anyway (which was not a lie), still considers Shuichi his sidekick because he’s stopped being an idiot about that, still considers Kokichi a terrible person because he still was even though he had issues, Kokichi’s final words were more emotionally honest than he’d ever been, and Shuichi’s final reflection on Kokichi drew attention to the fact that the writers may have considered him somewhat more of a narrative device than a character.

That was basically the last thing of note anyone says about Kokichi this chapter, so for the most part, we are done with him. Now we can focus entirely on Kaito and his friends.

Kaito:  “That pretty much wraps up my explanation. Now, finally… I need to apologize to Shuichi…”

Kaito’s got one of his biggest smiles as he says this! He’s not showing any kind of pain or awkwardness about doing this at all – he’s just happy that he’s finally able to give his friend the apology he’s owed him for several days now.

Shuichi:  “What? Me?”

Shuichi has no idea what Kaito could possibly need to apologise to him for. What do you mean there was ever some kind of problem or mistake on Kaito’s end. What.

Kaito:  “To be honest… I was jealous of you.”

Kaito is still smiling as he admits this, too – not such a big smile, but it’s there, and he’s looking Shuichi right in the eye. He’s not ashamed of this any more, and he’s not going to run away from how he felt, even if he’s still not proud of it.

An important point here is that having been jealous of Shuichi is not the part Kaito is apologising about. That was never his fault – nobody can help feeling that way about someone – so that’s not something he should need to apologise for and make himself feel worse about having done.

Shuichi:  “Jealous…?”

Shuichi is still very confused. Why would Kaito have ever been jealous of him.

Kaito:  “Because you were always saving us, y’know? Your detective skills kept us alive… You were just way too cool, and I got frustrated…”

I love his little “y’know?” there, like, isn’t it obvious that Shuichi was always saving everyone? Shouldn’t Shuichi already know that?

Kaito primarily presents himself as the kind of “hero” who can inspire his sidekicks, and he is genuinely amazing at being that kind of hero. But he was jealous of Shuichi for being a different kind of hero, one that can take action and Get Stuff Done and actively, physically save people. A kind of hero Kaito also really wishes he could be but is mostly pretty bad at being.

…The kind of hero Kaito nonetheless still managed to be in the end, at least a little bit, with his role in this trial. But even if he hadn’t, the luminary, people-focused kind of hero that Kaito already is is just as important and just as heroic, and it’s heartbreaking that Kaito doesn’t seem to realise that and value his own strengths as much as he deserves to.

(There might actually be a specific reason for this. Kaito putting more value on the kinds of heroes that win through fighting and plans and taking action might be partly because that’s what you’d find in very simplistic hero stories where the heroes are invincible and win without any struggle. Meanwhile, stories in which the heroes win because they're empathetic and good with people are likely to be more nuanced and character-driven, the kind of story that’d focus more on developing the hero's character and making him fallible while still a hero – and those are evidently not the kinds of hero stories that Kaito has read or internalised at all. So while Kaito calls himself a “hero” with regards to his role in inspiring his sidekicks, that’s much less what a hero actually is in his mind.)

Kaito:  “So that’s why I was so harsh on you. My bad…”

Kaito brought up his jealousy not to apologise for it, but to help Shuichi understand why he did the thing that he does need to apologise for, which was lashing out and making things harder for him back in trial 4 (and possibly also into chapter 5, if he’s realised that the way he was running away just made Shuichi continue to feel like Kaito was angry at him).

And remember how, during their falling out, Kaito’s fixation on his escape plan instead of talking to Shuichi suggested that he also felt he needed to apologise to Shuichi simply for having “failed” him by being weaker than him? He’s not giving that apology here. The only thing Kaito is apologising for is the one thing he should be – the thing that he had control over and that was his fault. He’s realised that he shouldn’t be making himself feel bad for no reason about any of his weaknesses that he couldn’t help. Right here at the end, Kaito is finally, finally getting his own apology thing completely right, and it’s lovely.

Shuichi:  “… Hey… No, Kaito, that’s not true… I was only so confident because you were there for me, Kaito.”

I love how badly Shuichi needs Kaito to know that he never had anything to be jealous of. The idiot that Kaito can be about this kind of thing, not putting nearly enough value in his own people-focused kind of heroism, he somehow managed to completely miss the fact that Shuichi could only ever be that strong because of him. Even if Shuichi didn’t always need any direct encouragement and advice, especially the further along things got, just having Kaito there was so, so important.

If Shuichi ever looked like a bright and shining hero, then it’s because he was reflecting the light that Kaito, the luminary, had always been shining onto him.

Shuichi:  “When you made me your sidekick, you said you’d ‘take the responsibility’… And that… That’s why I can do all this.”

This part in particular really meant a lot to Shuichi – it was upon Kaito saying exactly that back in chapter 2’s investigation that Shuichi realised Kaito was doing this to help him. After Kaede’s death and feeling responsible for it, Shuichi was so afraid of making even more “mistakes” like that that he was too hesitant to act. Kaito claiming responsibility in this way made Shuichi feel like he had a safety net, so that he didn’t have to fear messing up so much because Kaito would be there to catch him if he did. Given how Shuichi is, I doubt he ever felt like this would completely absolve him of all responsibility for his mistakes, but at least Kaito would be sharing that responsibility with him and he wouldn’t be going through it alone.

By now, I’ve stressed again and again how much Kaito advocates taking responsibility for things and not trying to run away from what you’ve done, so it might seem kind of odd that he’d have told Shuichi he doesn’t have to take responsibility for any of his mistakes. But Shuichi’s problem was blaming himself for “mistakes” that weren’t really his fault, and Kaito knew that. Kaito wasn’t really saying that he’d take all of Shuichi’s genuine responsibility for doing something bad, but rather that he’d take all of Shuichi’s unnecessary guilt that he shouldn’t be feeling. This was Kaito tailoring his support to cater for Shuichi’s specific needs and not something he’d say to another of his sidekicks. He never said he would “take responsibility” for Maki’s mistakes, for example, because that’d apply in a completely different and very inappropriate way for her. Kaito is so, so good at being this kind of hero and offering exactly what each of his sidekicks need.

Shuichi:  “If you didn’t talk to me back then, even now I’d be—”

If Kaito hadn’t talked to Shuichi in chapter 2 then Shuichi wouldn’t have had the confidence to solve that case and everyone but Kirumi would have died. And in cases 3 and 4, even though Shuichi didn’t need Kaito’s support anywhere near as directly, he still only had the confidence to solve them because Kaito had given him that boost in the first place. Kaito saved everyone just as much as Shuichi did. He may only need to give his sidekicks a little nudge to help them reach their full potential, but that nudge is absolutely vital.

Kaito:  “Hrkh!”

This conversation gets cut off by an extremely inconveniently-timed coughing fit, such that we never get to see what Kaito’s response to hearing all of this would have been. But you’d think that if Kaito had something to say about this that he really wanted Shuichi to hear, he would have made sure to bring it up again later. He… doesn’t.

Which rather implies that this didn’t sink in with Kaito as much as it should have done, and that he never quite truly believes that his role in making Shuichi into a hero was as incredibly important as it was. And that is heartbreaking. Kaito you absolute moron.

Tsumugi:  “Kaito, are you okay!?”

Kaito:  “Heh… H-How can I be okay? I’m… about to die…”

Turns out, big plot twist here, that Kaito is not in fact okay. But what I love about this is how he phrases it, which is a complete turnaround of the way he always used to insist that he’s fine. Of course he’s not okay! How could he possibly be okay through this? How could there ever have been anything okay about the fact that he’s dying!?

He only subtly gets that sense across in this one line here and then doesn’t linger on it because he’s still Kaito and he’s still not going to wallow and mope, but I love that it’s there. I love that he’s finally able to acknowledge at least briefly that of course this has always been making him suffer, how could it not.

(It also makes me mad that it happens to be Tsumugi who asks if he’s okay here, like she has any fucking right to act as though she’s worried about him.)

Monokuma:  “You sure are, bucko! Cuz it’s punishment time!”

Monokuma jumps in as soon as he says he’s dying. Almost like he definitely wants to make sure Kaito gets punished and doesn’t just die. Tee hee hee.

Maki:  “…I won’t let you… …I won’t let you kill Kaito!”

The Maki from earlier chapters wouldn’t be doing this, even if it were still a Maki who cared about Kaito. She’d realise that Kaito is a dead man walking on two separate levels, and that sucks but there’s nothing that can be done so there’s no point trying and she might as well accept it, just like she resigns herself to everything. But not Maki here! She wants Kaito to live, so she’s damn well going to give it everything she’s got to protect him, no matter how irrational and impossible that may be! What she wants matters! She’s finally being driven by her own desires!

Monokuma:  “Oh? You planning to get in my way? You know what’ll happen if you do that, don’t you?”

Maki:  “I don’t care what happens!”

Of course Maki still doesn’t care what happens to herself so long as Kaito can live. It has not occurred to her that Kaito feels exactly the same way on his end in that regard and could not bear to watch her die for him. What’s about to happen here could essentially be described as a clash of Maki and Kaito’s heartbreakingly unreasonable levels of selflessness… and guess whose is going to win out.

Keebo:  “Y-Yes… I’ve been determined to fight back for a while now…”

(Have you, Keebo? Have you really?)

Kaito:  “N-No… Stop…”

Last time everyone banded together to try and stop an execution, Kaito was on the front lines of trying to do so. This time, even though he knows how everyone feels, he’s once again doing exactly as Kaede did back then. He’s already come to terms with his own fate and cannot let them get themselves killed on his behalf, just like Kaede couldn’t.

Shuichi:  “No, Kaito, I can’t! I can’t let you die, Kaito! I don’t care if you’re sick! I don’t care if you’re dying! I won’t let Monokuma touch you!”

And just like last time, Shuichi is ready to throw himself into protecting his friend even though he has no talent whatsoever with anything approaching fighting. I love the absolute desperate irrationality of “I can’t let you die! Even though you’re dying!”. Although the way he then mentions Monokuma suggests he’s specifically thinking about protecting Kaito not necessarily from dying to his illness but from Monokuma’s execution. Even though he’ll still die either way, Shuichi’s seen how awful and cruel those executions are and he won’t let Kaito suffer any more than he already is.

(Clearly Shuichi has not thought this through and realised what an execution for Kaito would mean. Which is fair; why would he have done? The idea that Kaito would ever be a culprit in the first place was completely inconceivable to him until very recently.)

Monokuma:  “When a life ends, those closest to it mourn. But if you could somehow recycle that life…”

Monokuma is about to make a big deal about bringing his kubs back to life so they can pilot the Exisals again. So, while he and his kids are doing that whole nonsense shtick, let’s take this moment to consider, and appreciate, and pat Monokuma on the back for the fact that this is wasting several minutes of time, which has to be exactly what Kaito wants him to do.

See, Kaito has thought about the prospect of his execution. He had plenty of time in the Exisal last night to think about everything regarding how this plan would go, and given that he knew for sure Shuichi would figure everything out, he knew things would almost certainly end with him being executed. It probably crossed Kaito’s mind that there was a chance he could die from his illness before it gets to that point, and hey, wouldn’t that actually kinda piss Monokuma off? So anything he can do to drag things out and bring his illness just a little closer to killing him before Monokuma can do so is great – and if Monokuma wants to help him with that, well that’s just fantastic.

…Of course, it would have also occurred to Kaito, given that he’s seen all the other executions and how they were themed around everyone’s talents, precisely what his own execution is likely to involve. And… there’s no way Kaito would want to pass up on that, the chance to fulfil his dream in the end after all despite having thought it hopeless, even if it’d be what kills him. But then it’d be a shame to let himself get properly executed and miss out on the chance to piss Monokuma off by dying too soon. So really, the best of both words and the best way to maximally piss Monokuma off would be if he could die in exactly the right very specific, very small window of time – and I think Kaito might well have been hoping for that all along.

So during the Monokubs’ drawn-out return, imagine Kaito having a quiet little grin to himself through his pain, because maybe he’ll get to pull this off after all.

Monokuma:  “You guys are just as replaceable. Maybe not as replaceable as the Monokubs… But finding other people to participate in this killing game is easier than ya might think.”

Geez, Monokuma, why don’t you just tell them that the outside world isn’t dead, you’ve practically already done so by this point. He’s also not being especially subtle about the idea that there’s an endless stream of killing games and that people might not even really be forced to participate.

Shuichi:  (Finding other people?)

Yeah, Shuichi’s picking up on that a little bit. He never explicitly brings up this line later, but it probably helps him believe during next chapter that there’s people outside.

Monokuma:  “Now that the Monokubs are back, I’ve got my Exisal entourage protecting me again.”

Kaito kind of missed a trick by leaving his Exisal, honestly. If he’d opened the cockpit to reveal himself but stayed in there, he could have kept control of it, and then maybe fighting back against the other four Exisals would have been worth a try. So long as only Kaito fought them from inside his own Exisal, he’d be the only one they’d have the right to kill for breaking the rules. But even if this option occurred to him, he might have been worried that the others (especially Maki) would join in the fight and get themselves killed no matter how fiercely he told them to stay back.

And while a practically-hopeless last stand of one Exisal against four is still the kind of thing Kaito might be stubborn and determined enough to try anyway just for the sake of going out with a bang… he’s already planning a better way to do that.

Maki:  “So what? It doesn’t matter… I won’t let you kill Kaito. I’ll… fight until the end…”

Kaito:  “S-Stop… Even if you fight the Exisals, you’ll just get killed, dammit!”

Maki, you may be a badass but you cannot fight five Exisals with just a knife. The way her words start to hesitate a bit suggests she’s starting to realise that this is hopeless and she’s only going to get herself killed – but there’s still a part of her that’d be okay with that because at least she’d be trying to save him and wouldn’t just be helplessly watching him die (because her life still doesn’t matter next to his, right?).

Kaito:  “The remote control and the last Electrobomb were crushed in the press.”

Okay, so I said we were mostly done with Kokichi, because here is one last point about him for this chapter. I never see this line talked about, and it really, really should be. Because the fact that Kokichi could have let Kaito keep the Electrobomb and the remote but didn’t proves two very important things about him and his plan.

Thing one: the reason Kokichi carried out this plan had nothing to do with wanting to save everyone. Sure, saving everyone by ending the killing game would have resulted if it’d succeeded, but that’s not why Kokichi did it. He only cared about “winning”. If he’d cared about saving everyone, then anything that could give them an edge in fighting back against Monokuma would be something he’d have wanted Kaito to keep so he could pass it onto the others in case the plan failed. The remote in particular would be incredibly helpful, because it’d mean they could take control of the Exisals even if they had Monokubs inside and this situation right now wouldn’t be a problem. Even if the reason Kokichi had kept Miu’s inventions from them until now was because he genuinely thought his grand plan was the best way to end the killing game and save everyone (which, wow, what an even bigger idiot he’d have had to be to believe that), there’d be no reason not to pass the gadgets on to Kaito so that the others could use them and continue to fight back in the event that his main plan did fail. Buuuuut he didn’t.

Kaito and Kokichi co-operated in this plan, but they each had completely different reasons for doing it. Kaito did it for the chance at saving everyone, whereas Kokichi only did it because he wanted to “win” the killing game, and not because he cared about what would happen to everyone else when he did.

So Kokichi didn’t actively want to give Kaito the gadgets because he didn’t care about saving everyone, but since he’s also not evil, he’d still have no reason not to do so anyway, right? Yet, evidently, he had one. The only way Kokichi would have had an active reason not to give Kaito the weapons would be if he thought doing so might compromise the plan… so it seems he thought just that.

Which brings us onto thing two: apparently, despite using him as the accomplice in his plan, Kokichi still never truly trusted Kaito. He thought that if Kaito realised there was another way to try and save everyone, by controlling all five Exisals and fighting back – a better way that he would rather do over faking his death and lying to his friends about it for a whole trial – then maybe he’d forgo Kokichi’s plan entirely and just do that. Maybe he’d do so even if he said he agreed to the plan and promised Kokichi that he’d go through with it. So long as Kaito had another option, Kokichi could never trust that promise, because Kokichi could not trust anyone. Kaito could totally have only made that promise to get Kokichi under the press so that he could make Maki spotless, but then be planning to betray the rest of the promise as soon as Kokichi’s dead, right? There’s definitely nothing ingrained in Kaito’s principles that’d mean that if he made a promise to a dying man that he’s about to murder, he would never ever break it – obviously nobody could ever really have that much genuine integrity?

I’ve seen a lot of talk about how neat it is that in the end Kokichi had to put his trust in someone else after all, and I’d like to agree because that would be neat, but… that’s not what actually happened. Kokichi getting Kaito’s co-operation in his plan was never a case of trusting Kaito to do this for him. To Kokichi, it was nothing but manipulation, because his own ability to manipulate others was the only thing he could “trust”.

Anyway, back to not-Kokichi.

Maki:  “No, I won’t give up.”

Kaito:  “Maki Roll! Enough alre—”

Maki:  “I’ve never felt this way before! I’ve always fought to kill, but… this is the first time I’ve fought to protect someone!”

Technically Maki was always protecting the kids at her orphanage, and her best friend, by being an assassin. That never really felt like this, though, because that genuine desire to protect someone would have been clouded by the need to kill unrelated innocent people to do so, so she still just felt like a terrible person and not like she was doing any kind of good. But this is different! The only people she’s fighting are the bad ones who are trying to hurt the person she cares about and wants to protect, so she’s not being a horrible person at all. For the first time, she’s experiencing perhaps what it feels like to be… a hero? Or at least, someone who really wants to be a hero, which deserves to count as the same thing.

Maki:  “And… I’ve never… been given a nickname like ���Maki Roll’ before, either.”

Kaito:  “You…”

Kaito – it worked! You know you gave her that name to help her, and it worked! Be proud of yourself for that!

Maki:  “And I’ve never… met someone as stubborn as you before… … And… I’ve never…”

Maki’s acknowledging her feelings more openly than she ever has before, but even then, she’s still wearing her terrifying-assassin demeanour on top of it. She begins to cry here, but that doesn’t make her drop the knife or the threatening pose. She’s using it like a mask to try and protect herself from how much it hurts to be admitting this when Kaito’s about to die, and to desperately tell herself that she can still use her assassin skills to save him, right?

Maki:  “…fallen for someone before.”

…So. I’ve been having some Opinions about the way the narrative has been handling Maki’s crush on Kaito, most of them not good. But the actual main moment where it comes to light here? This I’m quite happy with.

The first time I saw this scene and realised where Maki was going with this, I kind of rolled my eyes and braced myself. I often don’t appreciate confessions of romantic love from friendships I’m invested in platonically, because it can sometimes feel like it’s diminishing the friendship I cared about so much. Like the only real reason one character cared about the other in the first place was actually because the feelings were romantic all along and they just weren’t admitting it, implying that obviously they couldn’t have cared about someone that much if it’s just platonic. That’s probably very rarely the authors’ conscious thought process with such moments, but that’s the effect it has on me.

Another thing I’m just personally kind of eh about with fictional romances is when the romantic feelings just kind of happen out of nowhere with no actual reason or basis behind them, since that’s a thing romantic feelings can apparently do. When you’re not interested in romance purely for romance’s sake, that’s just a kind of lacklustre thing to be the driving force of a relationship.

But that’s not what this is! Maki makes it very clear that this is about the things Kaito has done for her and the kind of person he is. This isn’t diminishing their friendship at all – this is about their friendship, and it’s only because of that that she developed romantic feelings at all and now also has those alongside the platonic ones. Note how she says she “fell for” him, like it happened somewhere along the way, not that she was “in love with” him or anything to that effect that would imply it was always about that.

I’ve said that I’m often annoyed with the way the narrative handles the writing around Maki’s feelings for Kaito, but that the writing of Maki herself on this matter is perfectly fine and appropriate for her character, and this here is no exception. I’m really, really happy that this moment is handled the way it is.

(Maki is ragingly demiromantic or at least some other flavour of aro whether the writers intended it or not and I love her for it.)

Me being me and personally preferring platonic love to romantic, I’d want to say that Maki still didn’t technically need romantic feelings at all for this to work. A desperate passionate speech about how much Kaito’s been such an amazing friend and she can’t bear to lose another person who’s this important to her after she’s finally started letting herself have friends again would probably have melted my heart a lot more than this, personally.

However, there is actually a narrative purpose for Maki’s feelings being specifically romantic that wouldn’t work in the same way if they weren’t. See, Kaito was always trying to make Maki consider him a friend. Her having come to do that was still essentially just her doing what someone else wanted of her, like she always did as an assassin, even if this time it was at least someone who genuinely had her best interests at heart for once.

Kaito:  “Maki Roll!”

But… Kaito was never trying to make Maki fall in love with him. His shocked expression for his reaction here makes it clear that he never saw this coming at all. This is something that happened entirely on Maki’s end and was all Maki’s feelings at work (even if it can’t quite be called her choice because romantic feelings don’t usually work that way and hers certainly didn’t). The fact that she’s come to feel something like this completely on her own terms without anyone else having wanted it of her, and that she’s finally willing to accept it and embrace it and let it drive her actions is such a big deal for Maki and her development.

Maki’s arc here could have been written as a very stereotypical, shallow case of “emotionally repressed traumatised girl learns how to emotions again when she awakens to the power of ~true love~”, but anyone who thinks that’s actually what it is is completely missing the point and really needs to look at it in more detail. Maki learning how to be a person again is primarily about her friendship with Kaito and Shuichi, and meanwhile the romantic aspect serves a different purpose that’s a lot more unique to Maki’s more specific issues than such a thing usually is.

And we’re still not done with this part of Maki’s arc either, because this comes back during trial 6 in a way that also wouldn’t work if her feelings were nothing but platonic. So that’ll be a thing when we get there.

Maki:  “I… don’t want this to end. I just… don’t…”

Not to belabour this point or anything, but what she wants matters! I love her “I just don’t” – the only reason for her actions is that she simply doesn’t want this; she doesn’t need any other justification than that. Look at her go.

(She’s not even saying anything about wanting to be in a romantic relationship with Kaito or anything to that effect, which I also appreciate because that wouldn’t remotely be the point right now and maybe he wouldn’t want that and Maki definitely wouldn’t think about things that way. She just doesn’t want to lose him, that’s all, and that’s enough.)

Kaito:  “… Maki Roll… I’m sorry… but that’s not an option. I don’t have as much time left as you think…”

Kaito, you were doing so well earlier; don’t apologise for dying. You know that’s not your fault and is the last thing you ever wanted to do to them. Of course you hate how much this is hurting her, but you don’t need to make yourself feel even worse about it, you moron.

Kaito:  “I’m… fighting just to stay standing.”

It is Very Disappointing to me that this line doesn’t spur Shuichi and/or Maki to immediately rush to his side and help him. Even if he evidently can still stand regardless, he shouldn’t have to fight so hard to do so! At this point, with the vulnerability he’s showing at last, it’s almost certain that Kaito would finally be willing to actually let his sidekicks support him, and seeing that happen very literally would have been lovely.

(I will console myself by assuming that the only reason this doesn’t happen is that it would have been pretty awkward to show using just sprites – and there are some Very Excellent sprites of Kaito we’re still yet to see that we’d miss out on if everything became an illustration from here on – so that’s why the writers didn’t do it and it would totally have happened otherwise. Yes.)

Kaito:  “Hey, Maki Roll. I asked you before… What’s your enemy?”

Kaito isn’t even directly responding to Maki’s confession of her feelings, which I love. It appears he also understands that the most important part of her feeling that way is less about him and really more about her and how far she’s come, so he’s taking this opportunity to continue to make this about her issues and her growth. Whether he reciprocates her romantic feelings or not, telling her either way would only make her feel worse given that he’s about to die. Doing that would make this about him, and of course Kaito isn’t going to make it about how he feels, especially not now. The only thing that matters is him continuing to help Maki so that she’ll be okay once he’s gone.

(For the record, I don’t personally believe Kaito reciprocates Maki’s romantic feelings, but I also think that there’s basically no actual evidence either way, because even if he did it’d be something he wouldn’t show as he never makes things about himself. It really doesn’t matter, though; even if his feelings don’t happen to be romantic, Kaito very clearly loves both his sidekicks with all of his heart, and that’s the important part.)

Kaito:  “Before… you hated yourself so much. You didn’t even like yourself a little… And wasn’t that the reason you tried to distance yourself from others? You decided that you didn’t deserve to have friends, didn’t you? That was your enemy.”

Of course Kaito knew all along what Maki’s “enemy” was. He never mentioned it before because it was up to Maki to figure it out and realise it for herself in order to properly fight it. He’s only bringing it up now so that he can help her see how far she’s come already.

Kaito:  “But not anymore, huh? You’re alright now!”

This is one of the Very Excellent Kaito Sprites that I mentioned a moment ago! I absolutely adore how much he’s able to fight through his own pain in order to smile for his sidekicks’ sake. This isn’t even a fake smile, either – he’s genuinely so proud of Maki and so happy for her, and he’s not going to let something irrelevant like the fact that he’s suffering and dying stop him from showing that!

Kaito:  “You fell for a guy like me!”

Kaito. Kaito. What on earth do you mean, “a guy like you”? If Maki was going to fall for someone, why shouldn’t it be you? You saved her. You’re amazing.

This is a subtle indication that right now, heartbreakingly, Kaito… doesn’t think he’s worth all that much at all. I don’t think he hates himself any more like he definitely did at the end of chapter 4, not after everything that happened this chapter and having at least managed to help a little bit in the end. But he still doesn’t see himself as anything special on the grand scale of things. Shuichi’s the real hero, not him, right?

No, Kaito, you moron. Even without this trial, you were already a hero the whole time, from the moment you reached out to Shuichi and Maki. The luminary kind of hero who saves people through words and not actions is just as important of a hero. That Kaito can’t see his own incredible worth even though it’s so obvious to his sidekicks is excruciating.

And the thing is, I really don’t believe he always felt this way about himself. I mentioned way back when talking about his parents and how I’m not on the “Kaito’s parents are assholes” train that it really seemed like his confidence was completely genuine. But that was at the time, during chapter 2, in which Kaito was still a relatively emotionally healthy person. Then he started to feel inferior next to Shuichi’s amazing feats in the trials, and realised he was dying and felt even weaker and more powerless because of that, all of which hurt so much more than it usually would in this situation where the most important thing is having the power to make a difference and protect everyone. It didn’t help that part of the way Kaito managed to cope with the thought of his inevitable death was by using his natural selflessness and his growing inferiority complex to convince himself that he didn’t matter so long as Shuichi and Maki were okay.

His lack of belief in his own importance is ingrained deeply enough now that simply having managed to make a difference after all, while it’s helped him feel a little better, isn’t nearly enough to fix the underlying issue. If he weren’t about to die here, this’d be something that he’d need a lot of time to gradually work on getting over and unlearning, just like his sidekicks have needed to do with their problems.

Kaito started out genuinely fine and relatively well-adjusted, and he’s also one of the lucky ones who never got hit with losing anyone he was personally close to. But even so, the pressure of this killing game slowly but surely broke him.

Kaito:  “Now you can learn to like yourself!”

Kaito casually diminished his own importance like this all so that he could keep trying to help Maki. He sees her as so much more important than him, so if she was able to grow this fond of him, then she’s got to be able to like herself now too, right? That’ll be easy! God, Kaito, you moron; Maki doesn’t even remotely see it that way.

Maki:  “… U-Ugh… uuugh…”

Even so, the way Kaito’s been insistently making everything about her and not him seems to have finally got it through to Maki that she really can’t save him, and more importantly, that there’s no way he would want her to throw her life away trying to do that. No matter how much she hates it, the best thing Maki can do for Kaito here is to keep living and try her best to like herself, just like he wants her to. Perhaps she can’t quite believe in her own importance herself yet, but if she means that much to Kaito, then… maybe she really is important after all.

(Meanwhile, the other person in this room who can’t quite believe in his own importance doesn’t seem to have considered that the reverse is also true.)

And so Maki finally drops her mask and just starts sobbing uncontrollably. This is still a sign of her growth: she’s not repressing any of her feelings any more, not even the painful ones! There’s some overlap with Himiko’s issues here – maybe she and Himiko will be able to help each other further with these kinds of things once they get out of here.

(For anyone who’s familiar with some of the V3 content on my main blog, you may like to know that this is the moment at which Maki totally should have thrown herself onto Kaito in a massive desperate hug, leading Shuichi to do the same and ultimately help Kaito understand and be somewhat less of an idiot about the things I’ve just been mentioning. But that didn’t actually happen, even though it should have, which is fine, it’s fine, because everything else that does canonically happen here is still lovely and wonderful.)

---

[Next post]

[firebirdsdaughter]

Heh heh, whoops…

… Realised I forgot to do a Ryusoulger Raw post.

So… Y’all get to hear my initial reactions to the subbed version! Yay! XD

Let’s a-go!

In no particular order and w/ many typos:

Naohisa peeling the banana for Ui bc she’s so busy staring. XD Ui, I know Asuna is beautiful, and the boys, too, but please remember to eat?

Well, that’s either really convenient, or Naohisa knows more than he’s letting on. This is Sentai. It could be either.

Aw, poor Melto. Come here, I’ll give you a hug. ^^ Sometimes I’m a good mother.

I think I already waxed about why I love the way Banba immediately, like, flies to this guy’s side in the tags of Ryuu’s gifset, but it still holds. Believes he can’t trust people and that kindness is weakness, but still can’t stop himself. I am really hoping for an episode/something way down the line where he has a ‘I would have turned into a monster w/out Touwa and the rest of you’ moment. Might just write one myself, eventually. ^^

And the coincidence, one of the true heroes of Toku, saving the day is also still hilarious. Like, if Banba had been one block over.

Why was he even on this street to begin w/?

Why is Touwa here? I find it hard to believe Banba would at all be interested.

No, actually, I know why. Bc plot.

Aw, he came bc he loves you two and is constantly anxious. Melto is absolutely the type of person who is afraid to let the people he loves out of his sight bc what if they didn’t look both ways before crossing the street and got hit by a truck???? And I doubt Biker Dad’s death helped that at all. Kou and Asuna are all he’s got left of his ‘family’ and he’s secretly terrified of losing them, too. Hey, Melto, I think I just got an idea for an angst tidbit for you, and I’m really sorry.

Aaaaand the youngest brothers are at it again. XD Dorks.

My ‘age’ order for this family is Naohisa, Banba, Melto, Asuna, Kou, Touwa and Ui. Age in quotes bc obviously the canon ages are completely wild. But I think I’ve done the fam break down before, so I won’t go into it again. ^^

I mean, gotta hand it to Wyzul. It’s a situation where acting blatantly weird and out of place works. Like, it’s a legit acting job. People in special events/games. Ren fairs. Yes, he’s acting really evil and suspicious, but that’s easily explainable as that being the character. Another pretty good plan. Very Sentai, but actually a good plan.

OH GOD NO! IT’S A MIMIC! DX

I don’t actually play Dark Souls, but…

Okay, but I wouldn’t be getting too comfy, yet. You’re missing one, and he happens to be the most stab-happy out of all of them. Like, I’m sorry, but as a villain, I would be celebrating while Banba was unaccounted for. I’d be checking the back stairwell.

This confirms that the chibis are merely going in colour order and have no bearing on the focus character.

Mother¡Melto makes another appearance, in a small way. ^^

I don’t know, Asuna. Given that none of you remember how you got here, I think it’s very valid of Melto to fear this was a Druidon trap.

Kou takes a moment to look majestic. XD HAve you been taking lessons from Banba? ^^

This is so obviously suspicious. Like. It’s obviously magic. Touwa and Asuna win the doofus award this ep. At least Kou figured it out eventually.

Touwa is the super winner of the award, though. Asuna had the sense to snap to it when told there were Druidon. XD

Honestly, she probably needs the protein and calories. Her super strength might mean she burns through energy faster than other people.

Actually, I dunno if that makes sense.

Mother¡Melto again. XD ‘Don’t eat mystery meat!’ is kind of like he’s telling her not to take food from strangers…

Yup, Touwa’s a dumb. ^^ I love how in the character blog, Yuito was like ‘he would have gotten scolded if his brother was there.’ XD Probably one of the reasons they didn’t want Banba in Wonderland w/ them. A) he would have snapped Touwa out of it too soon, and B) given how the chests open in their own, they didn’t want to reveal too much about his past, I guess? Though I wish they would tell us at least a little more. Keep it slow, absolutely, but I’m hoping for some more concrete hints soon.

A for effort, Melto. You tried.

Also, oh, Kou. ^^ Cutie. So it is limited—bc they had to stay trapped in the ‘box,’ it couldn’t actually grant Kou’s wish. But it sure tried. Kinda like w/ that Yummy that was destroying people’s dreams when it tried to attack Eiji, and the world came out of his mind.

Aw, he’s fine. The boy is durable. ^^

Kou, now is the time when you assume this is not the real world, you dork. XD

Aw, did Banba help clean up? Actually, there’s no indication if he did or not, but it’s sweet to think he did. ^^

I mean, he’s got a point. It could have a backlash. My recommendation would be to poke it first. Though since Kou crashed into it before, it’d probably just be impervious…

Oh, don’t remind him of that, that was (obviously unintentionally) kinda insensitive of her… Well, it did say that she sometimes has a habit of saying the wrong thing/speaking so bluntly she has trouble communicating… We haven’t really seen that yet, but I think it’s kind of coming into play here, since Melto’s bio, and this ep, establish that Melto is self conscious and doubts himself in comparison to the others… So that probably hurt him a lot  more than she intended it too.

But bc he’s Melto, he didn’t communicate that, so she had no way of knowing and no chance to reassure him she didn’t mean it that way.

God, Banba’s got a compulsive apologising streak, Melto has an inferiority complex, neither likes admitting hurt/weakness, esp to people they care about… And then there’s Asuna being too blunt and saying thing w/out thinking, Kou and Touwa are probably in the ‘bottle things up’ boat, too, just of the Stepford Smiler/Snarker variety… Any more of my quirks you’d like to spread out amongst the team, Toei? Like, maybe Gold is constantly terrified he’s bothering everyone?

Sorry (exhibit A XD) that got a little nonsensical. Right now it’s mainly Banba, Melto, and Asuna who are exhibiting some of my habits (apologising [for ex. rather than thanking someone], a slight inferiority complex compared to more “successful” friends, an in ability to read social cues and saying things w/out thinking).

And I love them for it. DX Really gotta write more Melto now!

Aaaaaaaaand… Now I’m crying all over again. DX I mean, hi Biker Dad and all, but poor Melto… TT^TT

This poor baby… DX Like, you can tell that for a fraction of a second, he’s almost like ‘oh my god, you’re alive?!?!?’ And… Then the memory hits him. DX

And then he promptly logics himself out to ‘I’m hallucinating.’ Oh, baby… DX

I know it would’ve broken the illusion, but… I wish Melto could’ve hugged him. Let the boy hug his Biker Dad. DX

Or, if not, can someone please hug someone??? Please?!?!?

Aw, he’s scared, though. I mean, I totally think he was the anxious, ‘oh my god what if I turn around for a moment and they fall of a cliff?!?’ sort of person before, but losing their Masters magnified that. He loves them so much he was afraid of something happening to them before, but now that something terrible has happened to someone else he loves, it’s even worse.

Basically, he was already terrified of something bad happening to the people he loved, and then something did, validating that terror.

Inferiority complex probably didn’t help. It’s not exactly resentment toward people perceived as ‘better’ (though there is some in it), but feels like a failure on the part of the one w/ the complex for not being ‘good enough’ or able to ‘catch up.’ He knew they were good at fighting, but was terrified by their recklessness and feared he might not be strong enough to help them one day, or something. Not sure any of that made sense.

I do like the idea of Biker Dad inside the Blue RyuSoul just being like, ‘oh no, Melto is worrying himself into a corner, maybe it will help if I astral project and give him a pep talk.’ Might be cute if the Masters’ souls are still semi ‘present’ or ‘aware’ in the RyuSouls.

…

… Ooooooo. I just got an idea. Kinda like in that Magiranger episode. Like, the trio get trapped in some ‘magical dimension’ or something again, and, like, the Masters are somehow there, or their souls come out of the RyuSouls somehow… Anyway, could have something like when… Houka, I think it was, didn’t want to leave that place bc it seemed like their mother was there. Could also include friendship bc maybe the final straw for them finding the will to go isn’t just ‘we need to protect the world’ but also, on a more personal level, the Tatsuis and the brothers? Like, if they realise that the boys are getting overwhelmed in the real world, esp if the brothers are partially fighting to try and rescue them, and are about to get defeated, and meanwhile Ui’s in the line of fire bc she’s trying to help civilians and doing everything she can, too… Could be cute. And heartbreaking.

That was a bad explanation, I’ll try to be more concise later.

Why… Is he explaining this?

Again. I wouldn’t be celebrating while mister handsome murder boy the Majestic Knight is still at large.

I like how it’s still saying ‘here, here.’

Wow, Melto can jump!

Oooo. They came out of the fire! Cool effect.

I’d question how Biker Dad knows this, but he’s dead, so maybe he’s omniscient now. I dunno. I’m inclined to give more leeway to people knowing weird things if they’re dead. Bc they’re no longer tied to this plane, ya know?

Anyway.

…

……

……… Butt. DX

AAAAH! DX Poor baby. He’s all like ‘I did it, dad!’ and briefly forgets that it was an vision, and then of course Biker Dad is gone, and it… TT^TT

Ah, yes. The perfect way to get me to stop crying. Cut directly from sad, introspective Melto to Banba tenderly caressing the lid of some random box. XD

Now, I will not grow out of that joke. XP Ryusoulger here, making me jealous of inanimate objects like pros.

Must everything he does be so very attractive? And by that I mean sexy? But for some reason I am very self-conscious about that word???

Touwa still wins the super doof award.

And now, Melto does math. I think.

XD Kou’s crash into the dome was useful! Though I’m impressed Melto could have any estimation of what the height of that was. ^^

I really like the little collars of the suits. I really do.

AH. I FIGURED IT OUT. THE LITTLE ‘LIFE BLOBS’ ARE SUPPOSED TO REPRESENT THE MINUSAUR!

(pictures at the bottom)

CUTE.

XD Using the Minusaur’s power against it. ^^ Nice going Melto.

I guess it’s not technically him piloting alone—though he does seem to be the one in control…

XD Wyzul and Crayon’s reactions are so funny. ^^

Touwa just lying on the grou w/ his arms folded is still funny.

Banba just… Freaking teleports behind Kou. How did he even find them? Did he walk down the street carrying the box while fully transformed? XD

Banba interrogating the mooks is hilarious bc, esp in most recent years, they can’t actually talk. The most recent exception I can think of is Kyuranger’s mooks.

XD The absolutely unnecessarily fancy sword twirling he does just to point it in the other direction. <3

I mean, I guess it might seem a little silly, but… Isn’t there a belief in Shinto that all things have souls, even inanimate objects? So… Not so far afield, really. Though that does kinda make it sadder that Banba just smashed it. DX Requiescat in pace, antique miniature garden box. Thank you for your sacrifice.

Most easily defeated Mimic. Ever.

Asuna and Kou are either staring into my soul, or thinking about how cool Banba is, and I find both to be valid.

Touwa, don’t be mean. DX Ah, dorks.

This scene is really cute. Y’all here turning into a family w/out noticing, between the younger sibs teasing Melto and then goofing off among themselves, Banba just walking behind them like a tired babysitter and even shooting a look at Melto like he’s trying to make sure Blue’s still w/ them… Cuties.

Also, Touwa bouncing. ^^ <3

The soft piano version of the theme song definitely helps, too. ^^

That hug is still available if you want it, Melto.

And yes, I’d like to think it was. ^^

Still wondering what was up w/ that hooded person. They’re in the opening. They can’t just forget they exist! What happened in the rest of that secene w/ the brothers? Not even Touwa has mentioned it. Did they get their memories of the encounter wiped? Or is there something more?

Preview:

I like the opening shot of Asuna playing a carnival game while the boys watch. Like, it’s so cute and family-y. Melto’s so excited for her like a proud mom and Kou seems to trying to perfect his strategy. XD

Asuna once again finds herself talking people out of… That.

At this point, I don’t care how short that Banba sulking scene is or how little it relates to the plot. I just want to see it. ^^

That’s all, folks! Virtual mochi for anyone who read all that! I really liked this episode, and I’m glad for Melto getting a chance to be very heartbreaking, too. Next episode is an Asuna ep, and while I’m a little cagey about it bc of the short summary we saw at first, I’m willing to give the show the benefit of the doubt and not jump to conclusions about how they’re going to handle it. Hoping we’ll see Anky Mom, too, though there haven’t been any shots of her in the previews… Well, it wouldn’t make much sense if they didn’t eventually bring her back in some way. Still hoping for more concrete info about the brothers’, and specifically Banba’s past. Not all at once, but you could slowly start giving us more. Though it’s not that pressing, and is mainly bc I’m an impatient baby—they’ve got time to do it. And then there’s mysterious hooded person who is in the opening. Gaisoulg? Master Gold? Probably too old to be Gold, but who knows. It does seems strange that not even Touwa, the more friendly of the two, has brought it up to the trio. You’d assume he’d mention ‘oh, yeah, mysterious cloaked man came and sought us out and [something something]’ Makes me very suspicious of cloaked man. Did he wipe their memories? Threaten them? Just plan ask them to keep him a secret? Is he friend of foe? Is he Naohisa? Who knows. But I’d like some clues. At some point.

Lastly, the screenshots I promised, of the life blobs, and the thing everyone else probably already noticed:

[grigio-bone]

personal lupat thoughts

under the cut

i think that one of the reasons that people are getting frustrated with it isnt necessarily that the story is bad, its that the setup and outcomes of the show have this kind of... slight disconnect? or rather, not a disconnect- its as if the show itself can’t figure out if its going to be lighthearted or serious til the end, when its too late to give a satisfying conclusion either way.

its absolutely fine if lupat is a show with light plot. shows like that have been some of my favorites. but i feel as if frustration is inevitable and understandable when the show keeps hinting that things are happening and either never follows up or follows up far too late to allow for a nuanced exploration. for example, noel not being human was hinted at as early as ep 28, when tsukasa wonders why noel wouldn’t use the vs vehicle that he he made himself, and seemed intent on making the other rangers use it. but by the time the big reveal rolls around, who remembers this? mysteries are fine, but if theyre dragged out for so long that viewers have started to forget there was a mystery in the first place that... kinda makes me sad. if lupats going to be a show with a light plot!!! thats perfectly fine, just make sure to resolve the plot points at the core of your story and stop teasing things that wont get resolved for like more than a dozen episodes?

on that note, theres also this... hm. the worldbuilding in lupat is incredibly weak. theres very little sense that this is an actual world that has people living in it and ive got a zillion questions about everything. why is france hq in france?? what about the lupin collection black market trade that canonically exists? whats public opinion like on literally every aspect of the conflict thats happening? actually i could seriously go on for like hours about this so ill cut it short: basically, i think  that the fact that there are hardly any reoccurring or tertiary cast members and the fact that hilltop + jim carter + kogure are vastly underutilized puts all of the focus on the rangers themselves, which is nice but also leaves them stranded in a world not quite real

one last thing. i think that lupat tends to take the cheap way out of things. not in terms of effects or whatever, just that it seems intent on distracting viewers from the fact that it didn’t offer us a solidly emotional conclusion to some arcs? ok this is gonna be controversial so im going to add another disclaimer here that i did think that it was cool that the lupins loved ones became thieves in turn to rescue them, etc, it was a really sweet reunion, they look fantastic in those outfits, i did cry a little bit. however. lets take the finale piece by piece

1) patoranger side. their big speech in the final episode was about how they had to protect the world from a bloodthirsty monster like dogranio, because he made people suffer (people that the patos had failed to protect). ultimately, at the end keiichiro is offered a choice: he can kill dogranio at the cost of knowing that he would be killing 3 people that he knows and loves. we dont get to see what happened to dogranio right away, but the show lets us think for like 5 min that keiichiro too the shot. which... why? almost everything we’ve seen of keiichiro up to this point indicates that he would never do something like that, and if he would consider putting anyone in danger in order to do better, then tsukasa will punch him because that means hes seriously lost sight of things. its not as if hes been struggling more with the notion that he might not be able to save everyone as the series goes on- which isnt a downside at all, lupats characters are its strongest point and keiichiros solid lawful goodness is a core part of his character- but ultimately, we’re left at a point where there is no way that keiichiro would shoot dogranio and kill the lupins. there was never a chance. and with this being the case, the patos last big hurrah is ultimately a failure: they cant get the lupins out, but they also cant get rid of the threat of dogranio for good.

2) lets talk about the loved ones becoming thieves. honestly. i loved it. but its not as strong a reunion as it could have been. the problem with the lupins loved ones becoming thieves is that it raises like a hundred questions in the last 10 min of a show, and we don’t have a good understanding of what the loved ones are like as people without the lens of the lupins’ perspectives to look through. and again, all the meaty episodes with reminiscences about the loved ones were in the first half of the series? i dont feel that the lupin magnum ep bc that vibes more like a i am the shadow the true self type deal, but it does show that the lupins are bringing their loved ones back for at least partially selfish reasons: its not about what they would have thought about it, its about what the lupins want. but with this in mind... we don’t know enough about the loved ones to know many of the nuances of what theyre like, either as people or as thieves? were they worried? angry? would they blame the patos for failing to rescue the thieves? (also theres this whole thing about how if theyre acting as phantom thieves then the gspo should know about them but theres no time to get into that, i suppose) im not saying it was bad! outfits were super cute and kairi and his bros reunion was super touching but im sitting here in complete conviction that their appearance as thieves ultimately raises more questions than it does answers, and this close to the ending (like 10 min!!!!!), hinders a satisfying conclusion

(TBC LATER)

[a-splash-of-stucky]

A Messed Up Place | Eight

Pairings: Bucky x Reader || Steve x Reader

Summary: The morning after one hell of a night.

Warnings: Look, I don’t know what warnings I need to put, okay?

Mentions of past sexual activities and dub-con/rape (nothing graphic or explicit, but if you’re squeamish, I would tread with caution). Sexual activity and sexual arousal discussed, but there’s no smut in this chapter. Put it this way: If this chapter were to get an AO3 rating, I’d give it an ‘M’.

Notes: Uhhhh…I swear on my life that reader is a nice person, y’all. She is, she really is. Just…nice people do questionable things, sometimes. Apologies for the typos. 

Written for @hellomissmabel‘s birthday/follower celebration. 

AMUP Masterlist

Time goes by so slowly for those who are waiting for something to happen.

In Bucky’s case, that ‘something’ is waiting for the ninth day of June, otherwise known as the day when you become Mrs Rogers and Bucky’s chance of finding a happily ever after with you well and truly evaporate into thin air.

There are exactly 34 days left before your wedding. Not that Bucky’s counting, or anything. He doesn’t have a countdown app on his phone — god that’s too obvious. He may or may not have a small desk calendar stashed in his bedside table, though. He may or may not be crossing off the days as they pass, the bright red x’s he slashes with pen acting like a foreboding symbol of his impending lifetime of misery.

There are exactly 34 days left before you walk down that flower-strewn aisle in your breathtakingly gorgeous white dress.

34 days left until Steve puts a ring on your fingers and calls you his until death do you part

34 days left before Bucky’s time runs out.

Bucky’s accepted the inevitability of that outcome. He reasons that the sooner he accepts it, the longer his mind and body can adjust to it and therefore, the happier he can pretend to be when your big day actually rolls around.

Today, as he seems to be doing with increasing frequency as of late, Bucky’s holed himself up in his room. At least this afternoon, he’s tried to do something vaguely useful with himself, by clearing out the crap that lives underneath his bed.

Seriously. The experience has been a wake-up call. He clearly needs to do this more often, or be a little less lazy about throwing stuff in the bin. God knows how long that apple has been living under there.

Just as he’s tying off the bin bag, a sharp rap sounds on the door.

“Come in!” he calls.

“Hey, Bucky!” you chirp, shouldering the door open just wide enough for you to pop your head around. “You mind if I ask you a question?”

“Sure, come in,” he says, straightening up as he shoves the bin bag into the corner of his room; he’ll deal with it later. Bucky notes that you’re holding a box between your hands. It’s a glossy black colour, slightly longer than your average shoe box ad slightly shallower than one too. The seal on the front has been broken and a hint of pink tissue paper is peeking through the gap. He wonders what you’ve got inside it.

You set the box down at the foot of his bed, then step back and rest your hands on your hips. Your head is tilted to the side and you’re gnawing on your bottom lip incessantly, your gaze blank as you stare at the floor. Bucky shoves his hands into the pockets of his sweats and clears his throat obnoxiously.

“So…what’s up?” he asks, “What can I do to help you?”

The sound of his voice snaps you out of your trance. You look up at Bucky through your lashes, sigh heavily, then shake your head, seemingly frustrated. “I—,” you start, before clamping your mouth shut and crossing your arms underneath your breasts. You gingerly perch on the edge of the bed, to the left of the black box. The fingers of your right hand curl over the lid, about to pull it open, but — just when Bucky thinks you’re about to reveal the contents of the box to him — you pull your hand away at the last minute, chuckling in a self-depreciative manner. You smile forlornly in Bucky’s direction.

“Okay,” you sigh, “I know this is…look, you can say no if you want to, alright?”

Bucky furrows his brows, perplexed. “Say no…to what?”

You barrel on, continuing to ramble as if Bucky had never even spoken. Your words come out in a torrent, rushed because of your nerves. “I wouldn’t be asking you if I didn’t have to, but Nat and Wanda are out and I really need to hide these before Steve gets back, and—,”

“Hide what? Y/N what the fuck is going on?” Bucky asks, anxiety levels progressively increasing the longer he listens to you.

“—because I really want this to be a surprise for him, but, like, I really, really understand if this is a little awkward for you. And if you’d rather not, just say and I’ll—,”

“Y/N!” Bucky snaps

Your jaw stops moving, your mouth snapping shut sharply.

“Breathe,” Bucky murmurs, voice low and soothing. You close your eyes and inhale deeply through your nose.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to shout,” he says apologetically, scrubbing his hand over his eyes. “Just wanted you to calm down. Start from the beginning, doll — what did you need my help with?”

You groan, throwing your hands up to cover your face.

“I bought some lingerie and I need you to help me decide which one I should wear,” you mumble, the words coming out slightly muffled because your face is hiding behind your fingers.

“Which one you should wear?” Bucky echoes, mystified. “Wear for what?”

You drop your hands to reveal your sheepish expression. “Um…for my wedding. Underneath my dress. For um…y’know,” you mutter, letting your voice trail off as you cross your chest in a defensive posture.

Bucky blinks owlishly. “You want me…to help you…decide what lingerie you should wear,” he repeats slowly, at the risk of sounding like a fool. He’s still confused as to why exactly you’re coming to him for advice, of all people.

“Well, it’s kinda for my wedding night too, ‘cause I wanted to surprise Steve,”.

Oh.

It’s not like Bucky’s under any illusions, or anything; he’s very much aware of the fact that you and Steve have a healthy and active sex life (he’s had the misfortune of hearing the two of you getting it on during more than one occasion), but this is…downright strange. Oh god, if he goes through with this, he’s going to know what you’ve got on underneath your dress—he’s…he’s not going to be able to take his mind off that fact for the entire day. Goodness, he’s going to know what Steve sees when he finally gets you out of that dress. Fuck. Bucky’ll not be able to focus on anything else for that entire evening, because he’ll be so caught up in his head. He’s not jealous, per se, but the reminder just…strikes a chord inside him. He feels a tad bit remorseful, if he’s honest.

“Doll, I hardly know anything about lingerie,” Bucky points out, taking his hands out of his pockets to gesture helplessly. “Don’t think I’m gonna be much help to you,”.

“I know,” you huff, “But you know what I look like undressed and you know what I look good in and bonus — you know Steve,”.

“Yeah, as a friend,” Bucky retorts, “Hardly know what he likes seeing his gal in, doll,”.

“Ugh, forget it,” you grumble, “This was stupid. I get it, if you don’t wanna help, that’s fine, I’ll just—,”

“No, no,” Bucky says hurriedly, crossing the distance to the bed in two large strides, “I’ll help, you’re just gonna owe me big time,”.

The corner of your lips twitch up into a weak smile. “I—look, I get that this is kinda shitty of me to do, and I wouldn’t involve you if I really didn’t have to…’cause I get that this is a lil’ weird because of the…history between us, but…uhh…yeah. A second opinion would really be useful,”. You pause, then hastily tack on, “But you can say no if you really would rather not do this, it’s cool,”.

Bucky sits down on the bed on the other side of the box, angling his body so that he’s facing you. “Let’s see what we’re working with, then,” he says, lips curling into a half-smirk. Bucky imagines it’s the kind of cock-sure smile his past self might have put on.

You smile tentatively at him before flipping open the lid of the box to reveal delicate scraps of lace surrounded by pink and white tissue paper. The inside of the box is a crisp white colour and there is a company name embossed in gold curlicue font on the inside of the lid. Bucky guesses that this must be some high-end stuff.

“So there’re basically three sets in here,” you explain, deftly picking out the pieces one by one and arranging them on the bed so that they’re laid out in a row. “I couldn’t decide which one I liked best, ‘cause they all have different vibes, y’know? Wasn’t sure what I was looking for,”. You finish laying out the lace piece of lingerie and move your hands away.

“So what d’you think?”

Bucky is stunned speechless.

All three sets are beautiful in their own right.

On the leftmost side is a pale pink bra and panty set. The cups are made of a translucent material, decorated with embroidered flowers and tiny rhinestones that sparkle prettily when they catch the light. The matching panties are equally translucent, complete with tiny satin bows on the hips. They’re cut quite low and, judging from their size, would expose about half your ass. It’s a set that treads the fine line between ‘good girl’ and ‘seductress’.

The set on the right is the complete opposite of innocence. With it’s fiery red colour, it is definitely the most attention-grabbing, eye-catching set out of the three. The bra itself, if he can call it that, seems to be composed more of cut-outs, rather than actual fabric. By his best visualisation, Bucky pictures the floral appliqué on the cups just barely covering your nipples. Your breasts would be mostly bare, framed by an intricate network of red straps. Bucky finds himself having to reign in his over-active imagination, for fear that lingering too long on the image of you in this set could cause unwanted bodily reactions in his nether regions. There is marginally more coverage when it comes when it comes to the bottom half of this set, although the accompanying sexy garter belt isn’t doing much to tame his growing arousal.

But really, it’s the set in the middle that holds Bucky’s attention for the longest. There’s nothing overtly remarkable about the set, really. It’s black and, unlike the other two sets, seems to be made of a shiny, satiny material. It’s understated, yet elegant. The edge of the cups are trimmed with delicate eyelash lace; the same lace seems to make up the back of the bra too. There’s a small black gem dangling between the cups. The panties have more coverage than either of the other two sets, but the sides are composed entirely of lace and, when worn, would undoubtedly give an alluring peek at the skin of your hips.

Bucky gulps nervously. The black set reminds him of a night that he would rather forget.

No, that’s a lie.

He wants to remember the good parts of that night — the soft feel of your skin against his, the warmth of your touch, the fiery passion with which you’d made love. Bucky just wishes that those memories were not tainted with the internal conflict and guilt currently weighing heavy on his soul.

“Fucking hell,” Bucky breathes, breaking an eternity of silence.

“So?” you prompt, looking at him expectantly.

“I just…wow,” he murmurs, casting his gaze over the lingerie one more time.

You chuckle. “D’you like them?”

Bucky pauses for maybe a millisecond too long before answering.

“Steve’s gonna love whichever one you choose,” he replies, wisely deciding to avoid that question in its entirety, stepping to the side and giving it a wide berth.

Because the thing is — he does like them, perhaps a little more than is strictly appropriate. Bucky’d like them a lot more if they were on you, but he’s not about to admit that to anyone anytime soon.

Even so, he can’t do anything to turn off the slideshow of images tormenting his mind; the pink lace framing your breasts, your nipples peeking through the see-through cups, that bold red number accentuating your skin tone beautifully, and the alluring way that black set would highlight your natural form. God, it’s making him salivate just thinking about it. Bucky’s cock is beginning to chub up in his sweats, its interest piqued by the impure thoughts and vivid — borderline pornographic — images racing through his head.

His mother’s probably turning over in his grace, at this point, disgruntled by Bucky’s lack of self control.

Forgive me, mother, for I have sinned, he thinks ruefully. A lot. Far more than you’d’ve liked me to.

What sucks most of all is that Bucky knows that he shouldn’t be thinking of you like that. Not now, not ever, and especially not after KL.

——————————

Bucky wakes up with a start, momentarily disoriented.

The room is dark, save for the weak tendrils of moonlight streaming in through the open curtains. He’s naked, with his arm wrapped protectively around your waist and his face pressed to the crook of your neck. With every inhale, he’s taking in a fresh whiff of your scent.

Bucky hurriedly tugs his head away — more out of disgust with himself, as opposed to a reluctance to sleeping with you in his arms.

His neck cracks as he cranes it over your shoulder to check the alarm clock on the bedside table. Its bright red digital display tells him that it’s just after five in the morning. He’s been asleep for approximately two and a half hours, then.

The memories of what the two of you have just done come rushing back at full force, colliding with him in a tsunami-like wave of raw emotion. Bucky’s not sure exactly how he feels, let alone what he should be feeling, but what he does know is that he needs to clean this mess up before you wake up. If you happen to wake up and remember the events that transpired a couple of hours ago, then Bucky will meet that confrontation with his head held high and his shoulders squared.

On the chance that you don’t remember what happened, though…well, Bucky would like to try and keep things that way.

Bucky allows himself to press one last kiss to the back of your shoulder, memorising the softness of your skin against his lips. With a muted groan, Bucky rolls away, forcing himself to leave the warmth of the bed and the comfort of embracing you. He winces as the chill of the night pierces through his skin, the room suddenly feeling much colder without you pressed against his side.

He gets up and ducks into the ensuite, flicking on the light as he passes by the switch. Bucky grabs a washcloth from beside the sink, runs it underneath warm water, then wrings out the excess moisture. When he glances up, he catches his expression in the mirror and grimaces.

It is the face of a guilt-ridden sinner.

With a weary sigh, Bucky wipes himself down with the cloth, scrubbing away the dried residues of semen and bodily fluids. He rinses the cloth once more, pats himself dry with a fresh towel, then brings both out the the bedroom to clean you up. Bucky pads over to the bed and perches by your side, being careful to not jostle the bed too much, for fear of waking you. He works quickly and methodically, wiping down your back, thighs and pussy as thoroughly as he can without being too aggressive with his movements.

Once he’s done, he tosses the cloths into the bathroom, flicks off the bathroom lights, then strides over to his bag. Bucky pulls out a pair of sweats and slips them on, not bothering to put on underwear, before grabbing a clean pair of boxers and one of his t-shirts for you. Thankfully, you seem to be in a deep sleep, not stirring at all as Bucky slips you into his clothes. His heart wrenches momentarily at the sight of you in his things. Bucky pulls down the corner of the duvet, then carefully scoops you into his arms and moves you to the top of the bed. He tenses as you shift around and mumble sleepily but, to his relief, you don’t wake up. He sets you down, then pulls the blanket over you. For good measure, Bucky strips off the top sheet and stuffs it into the back of the closet, because it has a giant damp spot and smells vaguely of sex.

He flies around the room, picking up various items of discarded clothing. His shirt and pants get neatly folded and packed away into his duffel bad. The dress you were gets put on a hanger and hung up in the closet. Your lingerie — if those goddamn scraps of lace can even be called lingerie — he picks up and drops into the cloth laundry bag that you’ve been keeping by the bathroom door. He packs away his shoes but leaves your heels where they’ve fallen by the foot of the bed, thinking that they’re not doing much harm by being there.

Bucky stands by the door and does one last cursory sweep over the room, making sure that he hasn’t missed any detail that might seem overtly suspicious. Satisfied that he hasn’t, he takes one last look at your sleeping form (ignoring the small twinge in his heartstrings), smiles inwardly, then pulls the door shut.

As they say; when one door closes, another one opens, except the door the opens inside of him is less of a door and more akin to a gigantic floodgate. The emotions come crashing though his system in tumultuous waves and it’s Bucky can do to keep himself upright.

Bucky flops down onto the couch and twists onto his back, hands folded over his chest and eyes staring at the ceiling, unseeing.

He’s repulsed by himself. More so than he has ever been his entire life.

The early morning hour seems to be a good a time as any to contemplate his poor life decisions and that, it seems, is exactly what his brain chooses to do.

Back when all of this started, you and Bucky had sat down and laid out some ground rules with each other, because as everyone knows, establishing boundaries is a must. He runs through them like a checklist in his head.

Rule number one: no kissing each other on the lips. Yeah, he’s definitely broken that one — multiple times, at that. Without thinking, Bucky brings his hand up to his mouth, traces the swell of his lips with the tips of his fingers, trying to remember the precise way in which your mouth felt against his. Though he has no trouble memorising 16-digit passwords with only a sparing glance, Bucky finds that he’s having trouble recalling exactly how your his lips slotted together with yours, exactly how soft they were, exactly how delicious you’d tasted.

Maybe that’s for the best; the less he remembers, the less he’ll miss. There’s one thing he does knows for certain, though: he was dead on the inside, before his lips met yours.

Rule number two: no having sex whilst drunk or otherwise inebriated. Yep. No question as to whether or not that one’s been breached.

Bucky remembers letting out a surprised huffed when you’d suggested this rule, reminding you that due to his enhanced metabolism, getting drunk was not actually a possibility for him — this had happened at a time before he’d met Thor and been introduced to the wonders of Asgardian liquor. Your expression had turned solemn and you’d rested your hand on top of Bucky’s.

“I know you can’t get drunk, Buck, but I can,” you told him, “And I know you’d never take advantage of me like that, but it’s better to get things clear now, right?”

His face contorts into a scowl at the memory. Taking advantage of you in your drunken state is, sadly enough, the smallest of his worries — the fact that he’s betrayed your trust is the bigger issue, from his perspective. It’s a fact that feels as heavy as a boulder, where it’s weighing on his conscience. Guilt twists its serrated knife into his stomach, sending ripples of pseudo-pain through his system.

Rule number three: no spending the night together after sex. For all the times that you and Bucky have fucked around, you’ve never actually slept with each other, in the conventional sense of the word. Much like the rule about no kissing, the no-sleeping-together rules was established because cuddling up in each other’s arms having just had sex seemed a tad bit too intimate for either of you to handle. Your fuck dates were literally just that: a good, satisfying fuck, before the two of you went off on your separate ways. Tonight was the first night that Bucky has ever allowed himself to fall asleep beside you and, whilst you technically didn’t spend the entire night together, there was definitely some sleeping in each other’s arms involved. And, as much as Bucky enjoyed it, it’s just another layer of complexity to add to the ever-growing confusion in Bucky’s head.

Rule number four: no unprotected sex, for obvious reasons. At least this one he didn’t fuck up as bad as he could’ve. Bucky had had enough wits about himself to remember to pull out at the last second, and he’s ninety-nine percent sure that you’re on birth control anyway, but still. The risk is always there, isn’t it? As nice as it would’ve been — god he can only imagine how sinfully good it would’ve been — to allow himself to finish inside you, Bucky knows that he did the right thing. The pleasure would have been short-lived and his level of self-hatred would be an order of magnitude larger than what they currently are.

There is one more rule, however, never spoken aloud or explicitly addressed by either of you, but embedded in the very nature of Bucky’s relationship with you: no romantic feelings. The two of you were supposed to be friends with benefits, nothing more.

Look how royally well Bucky’s fucked that one up.

Conclusion? prompts the pessimistic voice in the back of his head.

“I’m a failure,” he breathes, talking to the empty room.

A failure. An abject failure. A disappointment in every sense of the word.

A disconcerting feeling of misery worms its way into his bones. You’ve fucked shit up before, Barnes, but never as bad as this, he scolds himself.

With a resigned groan, Bucky rolls onto his side, turning to face the back of the couch, pillowing his head on his flesh arm. Though he prays for sleep to take him back into its clutches, that doesn’t seem like something that’ll be happening anytime soon. His mind is exhausted, the thoughts he’s been having and the secrets he’s been keeping finally taking their toll on him mentally. But at the same time, he feels wide awake, a million and one things galloping through the space between his ears at a frantic pace.

As time drags on, thoughts of you eventually get replaced by thoughts of Steve. Specifically, thoughts of how Bucky has let down the one person he swore he would never fail.

Steve is…there’re no words adequate enough to describe how incredibly important Steve is to Bucky. Not just as a friend, not just as someone who helped him adjust to the wonders and perils of this strange new world, not just as a connection to the past but because he’s — Steve. Good old, dependable Steve, who has never failed to come through for Bucky when he needed him to.

Bucky swallows anxiously. He doesn’t know if he has the guts to tell Steve about this. He owes it to his best pal, he knows this is true, but…knowing things doesn’t inherently make you braver. And Bucky doesn’t have much bravery to begin with.

Bucky is paralysed by indecision. There are a thousand and one ways in which things could go when you finally wake up, but he’s not entirely sure which one of those ways is his best case scenario. From Bucky’s point of view, for him, there isn’t one. There is no version of reality in which Bucky emerges victorious. He’s going to come off worse in some way, whether or not you remember, whether or not he plucks up the courage to tell Steve. Never a winner, always a loser.

Never the hero, always the sinner.

So yes. It’s cowardly, of this he is fully aware, but he hopes to the dear Lord in heaven that you don’t remember a thing when you wake up in the morning.

But god, what if you do? he frets. What if you tell Steve? Or—worse, what if you don’t?

Can Bucky live with himself, knowing that he’s carrying around a secret as big as the fucking sun, a secret so immense it could demolish the very foundations upon which his sanity depends on? Equally, can he ever truly be himself without Steve?

Bucky feels that at this point, it’s no longer a question of head battling over heart. There are a multitude of voices creating a dissonant cacophony inside his head; they’re threatening to crack his skull open with the racket they’re creating. He feels like the universe is playing a twisted game of tug of war with his mind, threatening to split his identity in two — on the one hand, he knows he should ‘fess up and admit to his mistakes. On the other hand, he doesn’t want to lose the trust of the two people he loves most.

He doesn’t know what’s worse. You not remembering a thing, or you remembering something — maybe by putting the pieces of the puzzle together — and accusing Bucky of rape. He’s going to get hurt no matter the outcome. It’s just a matter of which kind of hurt is more tolerable.

Bucky sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose with his metal fingers. There’s a deafeningly loud din inside his brain right now, and the beginnings of a migraine are starting to throb in the back of his head. Though he’s too wired to sleep, he forces himself to focus on the steady rise and fall of his chest, slowly grounding himself which each breath he takes.

There’s not much he can do about anything at this point, he muses. Whatever happens, happens. Bucky comes to the conclusion that he will confront the truth if it comes to greet him. That is, if you ask him outright whether or not the two of you had sex, he’ll not deny the fact that you did. Whatever the end result of that admission may be, he’ll tell you the truth. But, if you don’t bring up the subject, Bucky’s not going to be the one to broach the topic.

When sleep finally overtakes him, it’s uneasy. Flickers of half-formed nightmares brush along the edges of his mind, enshrouding him in an oppressive, inescapable sense of terror. He can’t shake it off no matter how hard he tries. He sees your face, he sees Steve’s face, he hears snippets of half-formed conversations, but he can’t—

Bucky jolts awake.

He groans as he rolls onto his back, stretching his arms above his head to work out the kinks in his shoulders. The clock on the wall tells him that it’s a little after eight. He probably fell asleep at around six. With the level of fatigue his body’s feeling, it’s a wonder he’s functioning at all.

The door to the bedroom creaks open. Bucky stills.

You come shuffling out, swathed in a fluffy hotel bathrobe with a distinctly grumpy look on your face.

“Hey,” Bucky whispers, slowly pushing himself up into a sitting position. He scoots over to one end of the couch and folds his legs underneath him. You flop gracelessly onto the other end of the couch, turning your body so that you’re facing away from the windows and the sunlight they’re letting in. You grunt out a good morning in return.

“Not feeling so good?” Bucky asks. His heart is racing, hammering manically against his ribs. He hopes that it’s not loud enough for you to hear.

“Headache. Not so bad,” you mumble. You pull your face away from the couch cushions and look at him through narrowed eyes. “What happened?”

Bucky legitimately believes that his heart might just give out on him.

“How much—,” his voice comes out croaky, so he clears his throat and tries again. “How much d’you remember from last night?”

You grunt noncommittally. “Not a lot,” you reply, your voice throaty and a little hoarse. “One moment I was raving, the next moment I’m waking up in bed,”.

Bucky’s insides are doing sickening flips. Relief is spreading through his veins, dampened by a faint hint of misery. “Oh, um…you don’t remember how you got home? Or afterwards?” he asks tentatively. Sure, this line of enquiry has a high chance of raising your suspicions, but dammit, he needs to know how much you know.

You shake your head but stop abruptly, wincing at the jarring motion. “No. Don’t ‘member much,”.

Bucky breathes out an internal sigh of relief.

“Actually, I do remember—,”

His heart forgets how to beat.

“—vaguely us getting into a cab. And then I have a flash of you carrying me through the lobby,” you muse.

Bucky wills his overactive body to calm down. He licks his lips nervously. “That all? That’s the last memory you have?” he pushes.

“Mmm, I think so,”. A pause, then, “Why? What did I do?” you ask, narrowing your eyes in suspicion.  

“Uh—,” Bucky flails, racking his mind for a realistic-sounding answer. “Nothin’, nothin’ happened, just tryna figure out how drunk you were,”.

“Haven’t gotten black-out drunk in a long time,” you mutter, scrubbing your hand over your face as you burrow further into the cushions, tugging the lapels of the bathrobe over your chest. “Tell me what I missed?”

Bucky swallows. His mind goes through one last-ditch battle between wrong and…questionably right, his indecisive conscience trying to decide whether or not he’s going to tell you what really went down last night.

“Um, we…left the club around one,” he says slowly, “I called a cab, brought you to the room, and that’s about it,”.

“How’d I get into your clothes?” you ask.

The hairs on the back of Bucky’s neck rise in response to the alarm bells blaring in his head. He chances a quick glance at you to read your expression; your eyes are closed and there’s nothing about your body language that indicates that you’re particularly suspicious. Bucky hopes that your question is just that: an innocent question.

“I, uh…I handed you some of my things and then you must have changed yourself,” he lies, “You left your dress on the floor so I hung it up,”.

“Mm, thanks,” you murmur.

“No trouble,”.

“Anything else?” you prompt.

Bucky hesitates, chewing on the inside of his lip as another flare of indecision spreads through the back of his mind. He could be brave, and tell you — in fact, he should be brave and tell you, he owes you his honesty, having done shit all with your trust — but he’s terrified of the consequences. Bucky thinks he can just about live with the knowledge that you have no recollection of what was undoubtedly one of the best nights of his life.

He doesn’t think he can live bearing the shame of your disapproval.

He hesitates for a few seconds too long.

“What?” you ask sharply, lifting your head to squint your eyes at him. “I did something stupid, didn’t I?”

Bucky curses himself mentally for his hesitation.

“Uh, no—you didn’t,” he says hastily.

You stretch out your leg and poke him in the thigh with your foot. “I so did, I can see it in your expression!” you protest, “C’mon, tell me,”.

Bucky hopes that you’re too off your game this morning to catch the way his skin has turned pale with worry. ‘Stupid’ is probably a euphemism for the shit that went down last night.

Of course he’s not going to admit that, though.

“You didn’t do anything!” he insists.

A hint of fear and nervousness flicker over your expression. “Seriously Barnes, how bad was it?” you ask, “What’d I do?”

You don’t seem to be inclined to drop the subject anytime soon, so Bucky roots around in the back of his head in search of a vaguely plausible story. “I ain’t gonna tell you,” Bucky sing-songs tauntingly, deciding to allow himself to be swept along with this lie. He’ll try and tease you for as long as possible, but himself as much time as he can to cook up something believable.

“Fuck you,” you growl halfheartedly, sitting up a little straighter as you shoot Bucky a murderous glare. “You’re gonna hold this over me forever, aren’t you?”

“Yup,” Bucky replies, popping the ‘p’ in a manner he knows will definitely irritate you. It’s so much easier like this, he thinks, teasing each other and pretending like everything’s okay. It’s not a long-term solution by any means, but pretending’s so much easier when the reality is that Bucky is just heartbeats away from an internal breakdown.

“Tell me!” you whine, “C’mon, Bucky, just fuckin’ tell me what I did,”.

“I’m not gonna—oof!”

Without warning, you leap across the couch — no small feat, given the hangover you must be sporting — and mercilessly attack Bucky’s ribs with your fingers. He lets out an undignified yelp, squirming to get away from you as you tickle his sides. Bucky dissolves into a fit of helpless giggles.

“Okay!” he concedes, half-shouting in his delirious state. “‘’kay, okay, stop it, Y/N!”.

Bucky places both his hands on your shoulders and pushes you back. You give him one sharp pinch on the stomach, before sitting back on your haunches.

“Ah—Jesus, cut your nails, woman,” Bucky grumbles, rubbing at the spot indignantly. You arch an eyebrow, waiting for an explanation. Bucky sighs, giving his full body into the action, exaggerating the rise and fall of his shoulders a little.

“You were telling me what you wanted to do to Steve on your wedding night,” Bucky says, “In full HD detail, I might add,”.

You groan, flopping against the back of the couch and throwing an arm over your eyes dramatically. “Really? I said that?”.

“Mmmhmm,” Bucky says, nodding his head sagely. “You were telling me about your plans to suck his soul out through his—,”

“Okay!” you interrupt, holding up a finger to silence him, “Don’t need to know what drunken me decided to come up with,”.

Bucky snorts. “Drunken you actually came up with some pretty good ideas,” he says solemnly.

You sigh heavily, lifting your arm up a little so that you can look at Bucky with one eye. “Let’s just agree to not tell Steve about last night, okay?”

Bucky’s heart shrivels up in his chest.

Shit. Steve.

The guilt comes back to hit him like an icy-cold slap to the face.

What hurts most is not the fact that he has to lie to you, or to Steve, although those two issues do contribute to the pain; it’s the fact that last night for you means something entirely different to what it means for Bucky. It’s the fact that you clearly have no memory whatsoever of last night’s passionate, heated tryst. It’s the fact that you clearly have no memory whatsoever of the one time Bucky gave himself to you completely. It’s the fact that you clearly have no memory whatsoever of the only time Bucky’s ever confessed his love for you aloud.

With luck on his side — though in fairness, with the way his life’s been going recently, that seems like a slim chance — you’ll remain in this state of oblivion.

But still. It hurts.

It’s better this way, he tells himself, nodding at you when you murmur something about going to have a shower as you get off the couch. It means that things are less messy between you and Bucky, between you and Steve — it’s the ultimate sacrifice, an act of pure utilitarianism. Giving up the happiness — and by extent, sanity — of one for the sake of many others. Sure, a secret that weighs about as much as a baby elephant is being added to the suffocating burden already on Bucky’s shoulders, but still. It’s worth it.

If it keeps you happy, if it keeps Steve happy, then it’s worth it.

——————————

“Bucky?” you murmur, reaching out to rest a hand delicately on his forearm. “Are you…what’s up?”

He gives you a tight smile, roughly shaking his head to clear the thoughts plaguing his mind, trying to centre himself back in the present. The three sets of lingerie are staring back at him, tauntingly inviting with their lace and embroidered details.

“Nothin’,” Bucky croaks out, taking a few steadying breaths through his nose.

“Bullshit, Barnes,” you scoff, pulling away and moving to pack the sets back into their box. “Look, sorry, let’s just—forget about it, I shouldn’t have—,”

“No, it’s okay,” Bucky says, his flesh hand darting out to catch your shoulder, “I just…that…triggered a memory that was…difficult,”. For once in his life, Bucky’s telling the truth.

“Oh Bucky,” you whisper, understanding flickering in your eyes. “Bucky, what you—no, that wasn’t your fault, okay? No matter what it is you did all those years…that wasn’t you, that was them,”.

What?

It takes his mind a second to catch up to what you’re implying. He tries not to let the sudden understanding show on his face. You think he’s talking about…a difficult memory from his time as the Soldier. Huh. He goes along with it, because at least this lie is easier to play along with than the truth.

“I…know,” he sighs, “I still did it though,”. His insides churn uneasily over the fact that he’s lying to you — again, for at least the billionth time this month.

You cluck sympathetically, resting your hand over his flesh one and giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Bucky—,”.

“Just…drop it, Y/N, okay?” Bucky says tiredly, his tone inviting no further conversation.

You purse your lips in disapproval, but nod in understanding, respecting Bucky’s request.

He reaches a hand out to finger the satiny-smooth cups of the black bra. “This one,” he murmurs, flicking his gaze up to catch your eyes. “This one’s the one. Steve’s gonna love you in it,”.

You beam at him gratefully, before surging forward, throwing your arms around his neck. Bucky’s caught off-guard, inhaling sharply at the sudden proximity of his body to yours. He doesn’t dare to hug you back, for fear that he might never be able to let you go.

“Thank you, Bucky,” you whisper, “I’m sorry for—yeah. But thank you,”.

“Thank me? For what?” Bucky asks, as you pull away. His brows knit together in confusion.

You smile, “For being you. You’re the greatest, Buck,”.

You wouldn’t think of me like that if you knew what I’ve done, he thinks darkly.

-------------------------------- Tags are open, but I’m only accepting requests from PMs or asks. Tag requests from reblog or replies/comments will be ignored. 

[96percentdone]

DR1 character rankings

I got bored and kept seeing @halfpastmonsoon do these and decided fuck it I’ll do it myself. It’s my blog right like?

Anyway uh in case someone gets super irate about it these are just my opinions and you’re allowed to like characters I don’t like for whatever reasons you want? You’re also allowed to hate characters I like! But isn’t an invitation for you to fight me just because I have different opinions, yeah? Okay! Under the cut!

1. Kirigi//ri Kyou//ko: she’s my god damn wife what do you want from me. I’m really gay did you see her in DR3--OKAY NO FOR REAL. Kiri is so good holy shit she’s like morally complex because she’ll do anything for the truth, even throw you under the bus just to make sure she can still live to find it. She’ll get mad at you for keeping secrets and yet she’ll keep like 8000 from you and except you to roll with it. My point is Kiri has flaws, but more importantly, she has like an arc where she learns from them? Like with the secrets she realizes she was being unfair, and when she throws you under the bus it’s when it clicks just how she was gonna KILL Naegi just tomake sure she could keep operating as herself. She realizes her mistakes, and she comes clean on all her secrets and apologizes. She’s got a lot going on. And I love her so so so much.

2. Oo//gami Saku//ra: too good for this fucking sinful earth. okay. No, but seriously I think she’s amazing simply because of her arc. She betrays them all in a moment of weakness, because she fears for her dojo, and over the course of getting attached to them realizes she can’t throw them all under the bus like that either. So she resolves herself and finds the strength to fight Monokuma, and suffer alone as consequence to her actions. But even that’s not enough. It’s not enough to just accept you’ve sinned and take your punishment, you have to do something, and she does. Through her own strength and love for the classmates around her she kills herself just to end their fighting. It stopped being about her, and just...grijgoirjgoirjgowe okay I love her. 

3. As//ahi//na A//oi: throwback to when the consequences of trying to get everyone killed mattered even a little! I love her a whole lot! She’s super bubbly and excitable and tries quite a bit, but the thing I like the most is how she’s is pretty much exclusively run by her emotions. ch4 plays out the way it does because she gets so caught up in her guilt instead of thinking it through more she decides they all must die for their sins. It’s only when she’s forced to think about the ‘suicide note’ that she recieves she realizes she fucked it up, and then apologizes. Her apology is glossed over a little too fast if we’re being honest, but it’s there, and we see everyone reason their way into forgiving her. Listen I just like ch4 a lot and she’s a big reason as to why.  

4. Eno//shima Jun//ko: throwback to when DR villains were actually good and compelling. Girl makes a fucking entrance and she stands out because she literally can’t decide what she wants to be out of boredom. It becomes so clear just in how she treats herself that the only thing in this WORLD that matters to her is her own entertainment and that to her, entertainment means despair. Boredom is the one true despair, and it can only be satiated by seeing other people suffer at their worst. She embodies despair because suffering is the only thing that can satisfy her own personal despair. She wants everyone to suffer like she does, so she can get off on it. It’s paradoxical and mad, but it’s genuine. Even when she loses, she wins, because now she suffers from the despair of failing. She suffers because things don’t go her way, but things not going her way alleviates her boredom. She goes beyond human comprehension and yet her actions have very real and permanent consequences. And she’s a joy to watch. DR3 never happened to ruin her. Nope.  

5. Fu//kawa To//uko: Man I love Fuka//wa I really do she’s a lot of fun, and it’s just a shame her potential isn’t capitalized until DRAE, but I did enjoy seeing her. The serial killer twist is fun too! I’ll admit I largely like her because of what DRAE does for her, but I think her persecution complex is interesting to see in motion, and that for someone you’d expect to be smart given her talent she’s just kinda a fool. She doesn't actually know what she’s doing at all. I’m mad she doesn’t get her moment in ch6 and it goes to Syo instead I think it’s crap how DR1 ignores her as a character, but given how well she’s used later I think DR1 is basically just her backstory in a lot of regards so ye. 

5.5 Genoc//ider S//yo: lmao she gets ranked less than Fuk//awa only because I like F//ukawa slightly more but they’re pretty much tied otherwise. She’s funny. I’m a little annoyed that she’s the one with the big climactic dialogue in ch6 versus actual Fukawa but whatever man.

6. Fuj//isaki Chihi//ro: y’know I had like several paragraphs here as to why I ranked Fujisa//ki here and then I realized the discourse I’d reopen on the subject is not worth it because Fujis//aki Discourse is eternal and no matter what pronoun I use someone would fight me SO. We’re just not gonna explain why. You’re just gonna have to accept it. I’m not doing Fu//jisaki discourse. If you message me on the subject, I will ignore you. The end. 

7. Na//egi Mako//to: Egg is a super static character if we’re being honest. He makes no change and doesn’t develop, but I think it was actually the point. I pretty much exclusively prefer a character who develops, but egg does his job well because he was meant to be SYMBOLIC of hope. Hope is not something that changes, it simply IS, so having him start optimistic and trusting, and remain optimistic and trusting works because he embodies the concept he represents. It’s kinda boring that it feels like he’s a vehicle to view the plot, but he works, and he’s a little funny at times. Also, I’m gay for Ogata Megumi so there’s that.

8. Ishi//maru Kiyota//ka: Honestly I think Ishi is kinda boring, but I just really like that he got suuuuper invested in Oo//wada only to crash like. I think Kodaka doing that and realizing how bad people took Ishimaru’s later death made him start having actual development arcs based on someone else’s sacrifice which is good. So at the end of the day, I like Ish//imaru if only because of what he inspired. But he’s kind of a cute character, and his “not actually gay we promise” dynamic with Oow//ada was fun. 

9. Hag//akure Yas//uhiro: For comic relief he’s actually kinda funny although I will never never never forgive the man for “Kiri//giri-chi is a ghooooost!!!!” shit in ch5 listen no fuck off fuck you she’s not a ghost. But he’s useless, but it’s kinda funny how useless he is, and I like how his useless stupidity actually plays a role because he makes things even more complicated than they need to be in ch4 because he’s dumb. So there you go. 

10. Ik//usaba Muk//uro: She like has no real character as a result of like not actually existing as herself in the 2 minutes of time she gets before she dies so I don’t know how people stan her, but I think there’s something interesting about her pretending to be someone she’s not the whole time. You see more of that in school mode, but I wish there was more of it in the main story to hint at the reveal than her DEATH. I feel like she’s a lot more interesting in theory than in practice. 

11. Oo//wada Mon//do: I just don’t care about the man what do you want from me. He’s kinda funny though, and “his totally not gay we promise” bromance with Ishi//maru is nice. Also ch2 hurts sufficiently and provides interesting commentary on toxic masculinity. But honestly, I just didn’t really get all too invested in the guy. His design’s cool though.

12. Ma//izono Saya//ka: she’s just really boring guys she’s like not interesting at all, and I don’t appreciate the game forcing her on me just for a plot twist of ‘oooo she dies and was gonna frame you for murder!!!’ There’s like nothing To her, and she’s intentionally played like wife bait so the reveal hurts more but it doesn’t really work when you’re not taking the bait, huh? All that being said I actually kinda like that at the end of the day she ISN’T wife bait and she’s kinda conniving and manipulative, but Kodaka decided we have to preserve her as “ultimately good” with that “dying message means she really does care” thing he hammers in so she’s a little wasted. I’d like her more otherwise. 

13. Yama//da Hi//fumi: He’s creeeeeepppyyyyyy. I’ll give him credit for one thing though and that’s like his creepiness is like reserved towards an AI? Like he’s not like a certain sdr2 character who I won’t mention by name, but like it’s still. It’s not good. Also for comic relief, he’s not very funny. But I also just kinda feel bad for him because his existence is treated as a joke by everyone, even the writers, and that probably explains why he’s written like that, to begin with. 

14. Ce//lestia Ludenb//erg: She’s a bitch? She’s not even a fun bitch she’s just a bitch. I just don’t like her better than thou attitude before her reveal, and her motivations after her reveal in ch3 did nothing to endear me to her. I think the writing behind her though works, which is good. The plot twist is satisfying for that reason. She’s like Ouma jr in regards to the DR Liar archetype, which is great tbh, and she has payoff, I just don’t like her as a person so she’s super far down my list lmao.

15. Toga//mi Byak//uya: listen he’s a douchebag and gets no real character development at all. like in ch4 he decides he’s gonna stop playing the killing game how Monokuma wants, but he still is the same fucking condescending better than thou asshole he started as. His major character flaw ACCORDING TO THE NARRATIVE is that he’s a self-absorbed piece of shit who thinks he's right about everything all the time, and yet even when he gets WRECKED in ch4, he like...stays the same. Instead of thinking “maybe I’m wrong sometimes” the conclusion he reaches is “I’ll stop doing what Monokuma wants” which alright fine but like that’s not the arc we set up for you. So basically Togami from start to finish is just a douchebag with no actual redeeming qualities. I will say one thing. I like him MUCH better outside of DR1, where he seems to have actually developed a little, and he’s kinda funny. Also his backstory is fucked I’ll admit that. But dude I don’t like the man. 

16. Kuwa//ta L//eon: If you’re wondering why Leo//n’s down here at the bottom even if I just professed to hating Toga//mi with my entire being it’s because I very aggressively don’t care about him. He is a non-entity to me. You could erase him from my memory and nothing would change at all. Also he’s ugly.