#there’s a lot of changes from the story I know

[lifeonmarz-blog]

Every planet in the 12th: Observations

The 12th house shows you in which ways you can leave the biggest impact on the world in the purest most intentional way if you so choose.

*I didn't feel like proof reading spare me*

sun in the 12th often misperceived or seen as having underlining motives even when that is furthest from the truth. Actually quite often upfront with their intentions regardless if they know more than they've led you to believe. The projection others put on them is veryyy high, sun person unconsciously triggering deep seated wounds in others while they just assume they’re having a normal conversation. They either love gossip or are always being brought up in gossip. Attracting secret admirers bc of the taboo aspect of their personality. They teach others how to be themselves through example and that gives them the popular loner vibe, everyone wants to know whats going on in their life. Though Its often not as interesting as the stories that are being created about them (probably at home chilling). Unintentionally very funny their light hearted nature makes others feel comfortable. They know how to create warm welcomes. They can read animals minds. They dress how they feel. Escape artist. Probably through music, film or imagination. Gift for photography.

moon in 12th romantic relationships have a big influence on these people. They'll change their whole life around to fit into their lovers life for better or worse. Naturally harmonious these people are seemingly unsuspecting until you piss them off then you realize they just choose to keep peace. Prone to escapism usually through some sort of creative pursuit turned business. Obviously not forward with their feelings ppl tend to label them as having their head in the clouds when in reality they have plans its just nobody else's business. There's a love/resentful relationship with the mother. The mother could've been a physical provider but not emotional. These ppl had to nurture and comfort themselves and it made them very good at being those things for others. Children and animals loveeeee them. They are givers and don't mind sharing for the greater good. Dependable and persistent they can stick out something they feel is important. But if they don't care... Oh its very obvious. That job they don't like? Oh don't even worry about it they'll quit. They don't like feeling stressed or unharmonious and don't mind removing anything thats trying to hinder that. In the lower natures this creates a person that ignores anything that would make them have to readjust their behavior. Extremely delusional and misreads the room quite often. Very emotional changing how they feel about you frequently. It can become hard to give and receive trust.

Mars in the 12th manifest things/experiences so easy especially through their connections. They know how to put themselves in the right rooms with the right people. They date people that improve their social standing and they do the same in return. When its comes to career they could've seemed like the runt in the group but they grew themselves to be well respected in their field. Often hearing ''you only got this because''. They attract a lot of haters jealous of their success or the way they got their success. these people are attractive and naturally have a body others envy, they always have options and good ones at that.

Venus in 12th boy oh boy the hopeless romantics, but whats so hopeless about it? Others may often wonder why you picked the person you did viewing you as opposites. There may be an age gap or cultural difference. The women often choose partners that have a different social standing or perception than their own. The Men do the same though their more willing to be in relationships with unrequited love. Have had their fair share of infidelity issues until they found the person that would ride or die for them and vise versa. Privacy and trust are high priority for these people. Very good at socializing they know how to read what is needed to improve the energy of a space. Their parties/hostings are always so inviting and rememberable. They work very well with children and animals. Especially those in need. Fostering is something they wouldn't mind doing, along with nursing things back to health. Examples hair, nails. Plants etc. Very crafty they'd create beautiful jewelry and clothing. Their style is unique and acquired taste even. Controlling an image or narrative comes natural these Pol could do damage control for celebrities. When Ppl are in a frantic state they know how to calm assist.

Mercury in 12th are good at controlling the narratives around themselves. People hand on to every word that's said. These are the types that prefer to talk when necessary and not give out to much information. Just enough to keep you hooked. They have a unique sound and are musically inclined it helps that they think outside of the box. Usually the leader of the group because of their ability to see the broader picture and keep everyones best interest at heart. They attract haters bc they set high goals for themselves they get viewed as outlandish or unpractical when actually they just believe in themselves and remain optimistic. They know alot about very specific niche things.

Jupiter in the 12th don't get the credit they deserve for being so iconic. They really are trendsetters that break molds and stereotypes and tend receive backlash for the things they say & do simply because they were the first to do it. Opening up the pathway for others to show up more authentically and protected. They have big expression and are passionate about the things they choose to do. Their not afraid to speak their truth and having a forgiving nature. Creative pursuits are well received by the public attracting sponsors easily. Its also easy for them to find/create a community ppl reall gravitate to them. Their kryptonite lies in their self esteem. If they can't face rejection they'll hide the best parts of themselves. Only seeing the beauty in others and not what they offer the world.

Saturn in the 12th need to know when to stop while their ahead. They get into unnecessary battles bc of a fragile or inflated ego. When the ego is healthy this makes for a very powerful person that commands rooms with ease. They make Pol want to sit up in their chair when they walk in. These Pol are stubborn but more often than not it works out in their favor. Very hard workers and the same energy they apply is expected from those around them. If they put in 80 hrs a week they expect the same from you, if I can do it why can't you mentality. They achieve alot and Ppl notice it but its like no one ever sees them working they just see the finished product and know a lot had to be done behind the scenes. For example let's say someone is very popular you know they would've had to built those relationships you just didn't see it happen. They could have a guilt complex about their achievements and feel like theirs still more they should be doing for other ppl. Growing up as the star, the golden child, the one thats going to help the family put a lot of pressure and responsibility on them. This could've also affected the relationship between the others siblings. Lastly these Ppl are either very serious about punctuality or show up whenever they want to. Maybe even both they could've started out one way and over time became another way. When saturn is damaged they run from responsibility and are viewed as childish and never learning from their lessons.

Neptune in the 12th know how to win over the audience. I chose the word audience bc they love an audience. Ppl will make excuses for their behavior like ''you know they had a rough childhood'' as if that excuses hurting others. Professional sympathy grabbers even when their not even trying and great ass kissers when they want to be. That is in neptunes lower natures ofc. These ppl speak their mind without a fuck given. This is like the only pile im cursing in and that kind of explains them. Their going to say what they want and don't mind shaking the room up. Image is important to them. They'll study their own footage to see what they looked like, sounded like, acted like, and change anything they deem as not fitting. They could be great actors or social media personalities. Also would be good at managing social media accounts. These ppl may be easily persuaded especially by those they view as having a higher social ranking than themselves. Knowing how to adapt to any environment is their strong suit. They act as a mirror in their environment and reflect back whatever energy you give them. To a T at that. They know when to play it up or be more lowkey. This is type of person to always leave lasting impressions on ppl. They could be the first in a taboo field to achieve something. Like being the first pornstar to get 100 million views. Its like when you think you have them figured out they do something else that shows there's many other sides to them. Often hearing ''i didnt think I would like you at first''. With a great sense of humor they know how to laugh at themselves and lighten the mood they don't take life to seriously. They attract a lot of unique ppl their friend group is very expansive. They could be friends with a stripper and an attorney. Hell they might've been a stripper and an attorney.

Uranus in the 12th they just pop up and ppl are surprised like ''omg what are doing here'' these ppl are held in high regard mostly bc their very selective with their energy, your viewed as a busy person so when you come around it makes ppl feel lucky. You treat others fairly and want everyone around you to feel accepted. You value keeping the peace. The fact that I'm even using you instead of they is a reflection of how inclusion is important for you. Having an eccentric vibe is more obvious here but alot of ppl go the opposite way and don't want to appear uniquely at all they actually want to be as plain Jane as possible. This can actually rub ppl the wrong way and make them feel something is being hidden from them like your pretending. Feeling criticized in childhood is why accepting others is something they prioritize. They end up in rooms with many different types of ppl. This placement has a lot of experience in a lot of different areas. With a free spirited nature they are open to trying new things pushing themselves outside of their comfort zone quite often.

Pluto in the 12th, a quiet energy standing in the back of the room scoping out the scenery. They notice more than ppl realize and are smarter than they let on. Often having their power tested bc of their calm observing demeanor. Ppl try to make them feel they don't belong in certain environments or that their not really qualified but they don't mind showing you why that perception isn't accurate. They know how to push back. The type to pretend they don't care about popularity but they work very hard at obtaining it. But maybe they don't care about the popularity just the power that it brings. Knowing the value of relationships they put alot into maintaining them. They are very giving to those around them. Self sacrificing even, its like they believe thats how you show someone you really care. These are some of the most passionate people you'll meet. They just know how to make you feel understood and seen. They make everyone feel special. This is one of the most intense placements for the 12th house. The transformations are deep, murky, confusing but it breeds and very self sufficient determined person. They question everything and are always growing and adapting. When they find something they like they become obsessive about it. They will work for extended amounts at a time. Like binging behavior. In Pluto's lower natures they develop a chip or their shoulder and use their influence to hurt others. If they are operating from that place they become very good at it. If they are never brought into awareness they continue generational curses but their children will have it worse than they did. These are the type of Pol that will tell you a traumatic experience in such a casual way and your just left like wtf you said that like it was normal. They also could've grew up experiencing their traumas being brushed off like they were normal. They were familiar with death from a young age and may have felt like they never really were a child. They build the trust of others easily and its bc their honest. It is what it is to them. They are natural born leaders it doesn't take much convincing & they don't mind leading the way as long as you give them their accolades for it. Mind you they could have a god complex but to be fair if you've experienced or achieved the things they have you might too.

[myokk]

Hi! I'm still feral for these two, would you mind giving us some art of them in their later years together!?

Hello angel!!!!

Sorry it’s taken so long to respond🫶🫶 but I wanted to draw some new art for this ask💓

We have: Sebastian and Eloise trying out their new fancy camera with a selfie, pictures of them with their daughter, and finally…idk I just always felt like this drawing is when they’re a bit older💓

I want to take this ask as an opportunity as well to talk a little about how I imagine their future (I have no chill & you can ignore this and just enjoy the art if you want😇).

I am a COMPLETE pantser - I never know how a chapter’s going to end when I start writing it (I always just have a few scenes I know I need to include to keep the plot moving forward). Although I have different *big* scenes I’m always writing towards, and themes/plot elements I’m always foreshadowing (shout out to @elliecutte for catching *almost* all of my hints and appreciating my general no chill😆), IM STILL NOT 100% SURE HOW I WILL END THINGS !!! 😳 I have a lot of endings I see as possible, and I think soon it will become more clear to me what will work the best💓

HAPPY ENDING:

Eloise and Sebastian become Unspeakables. I have a LOT of thoughts on this profession that could be its OWN post, and I feel like Unspeakables are generally specialized in one or two departments, but as their interests/research change they also change.

Eloise becomes an Unspeakable in the Mind and Death departments, with the occasional foray into Time. Her ancient magic is connected with all of these things (my version of AM is NOT like the game) & the Department of Mysteries is one of the only places that gives her any useful information about these things. Plus she thinks too much (it IS her hobby after all😆💓) and is very introverted so a hermit job like this is a perfect fit.

Sebastian becomes an Unspeakable as well, but I feel like it takes him a long time to specialize in anything, if he ever does. I just feel like becoming an Unspeakable is the adult equivalent of sneaking into the Restricted Section🥹🫶

They grow old together (I won’t explain TOO much) & have a lovely little family🥹 at least one daughter that they both dote on. Sebastian had an amazing childhood (idyllic until it wasn’t), and wants to give his daughter the same, and Eloise works hard to make sure their daughter feels the love that she never had growing up🥺

When Sirius is burned off the family tree, Eloise and Sebastian take him in🥹🫶 (they’re like 100 years old but WIZARDS LIVE LONGER…) The same happened to her all those years ago, and she wants him to know that his whole family hasn’t abandoned him.

Eloise LOVED her nieces - Bellatrix, Andromeda, and Narcissa - when they were younger, but as Voldemort becomes more powerful & people realize WHAT he’s doing, she has to separate herself from them. Her heart breaks seeing Bellatrix go mad, and seeing Narcissa engaged to a Malfoy out of obligation😔 (iykyk)

I haven’t thought any more about happy ending but I think it’s fun to think about how their future story might weave in with the actual canon events, ESPECIALLY since Eloise is a Black🥹💓

SAD ENDING:

After Sebastian gets his hands on Slytherin’s relic, it really starts to consume him and makes him even MORE obsessive than his natural tendencies - I imagine it similarly “talking” to him like Slytherin’s locket/horcrux did in Deathly Hallows (😳)

Eloise is deathly afraid of the changes she’s seeing in Sebastian and steals it from him (he would never willingly give it to her ESPECIALLY if it starts to feel like a precious item to him)

BUT the relic triggers the latent Black Family Madness in her - the madness that afflicts almost every woman in her family since…🤭 - and she herself starts to lose touch with reality. Her body and soul are already destroying themselves between the curse and the ancient magic inside of her, and the relic is what triggers it in her.

Sebastian becomes an Unspeakable, focusing on the Mind, in a desperate attempt to find a cure for his Eloise🥺

He never gives up his research, and sometimes when he comes home she is lucid and they talk about his research - otherwise, he just loves and takes care of her.

(He’s never successful in finding a way to reverse what he feels he caused in the first place - his ambition and single-mindedness is, to him, the reason why all of this happened)

Honestly who knows if I end their story either of these ways😌 I just love thinking of AUs and different endings and I have a few others I’ve considered as well!!! And whatever endings I don’t write will be immortalized on this blog and in my art as well🙏

[hunter470]

My 9-1-1 RANT

Ok, I don’t normally do these types of posts, but I can’t move on until I get some things out. These are just my thoughts about the latest episodes of 9-1-1 as well as overall comments on the Buck/Tommy relationship. These opinions are mine and are based on the countless hours of TV I’ve watched in my 54 years on this planet, as well as my knowledge of writing and how Hollywood operates. I’m not confirming that any of this is true or are the real intentions of anyone involved with the show. Just my opinions. So, you can agree with me or not. I’m not trying to persuade anyone in any way. Also, I’m not going to get into endless arguments about my opinions but feel free to comment if you want, I just don’t promise I’ll reply. 

Ok, here we go. Sorry it’s so long. Like I said earlier, I just needed to get it out. So many wasted opportunities.

If you think TM cares what the fans want, you’re seriously kidding yourself. If he did, Buddie would have been canon a long time ago. The only thing he cares about is ratings and his vision for the show, which can change at a moment’s notice with no rhyme or reason as we’ve seen. 

Although I loved Buck and Tommy together, I knew the show wouldn’t do their story justice. So, no matter what TM or OS have said, the bi story was only to garner publicity, draw in new viewers, and increase ratings especially with the show moving to a new network. There was no altruistic reason behind it so don’t kid yourself. They knew there was an audience for the story because of all the Buddie shippers. Just remember, it’s called show business, not show friends for a reason.

Do you think OS really cares about bi representation? Based on his latest comments and non-apology it’s obvious he only cares about getting the stories that garner him the most screen time and press. Seriously, read his latest interviews. He’s excited to get to have fun now. So, congrats OS, Buck gets to F around. Just shows how most, if not all, actors are ego driven no matter what they say. Sorry not sorry.

TM has commented that he doesn’t owe anyone anything. In fact, I recall him saying to Buddie fans if they don’t like it, read fanfiction. If that didn’t clue you in, then you weren’t reading the room. Kinda reminds me of another show runner…for those who watched H50 you know who I’m talking about. That’s why I don’t get heavily invested in these shows. I’ll watch but I never expect anything I like to last…especially if it has to do with gay relationships.

It says a lot that the show remained completely silent about the bullying and death threats Lou received just for playing a role he was happy to play. Again, they really didn’t care because they knew he wasn’t going to be there after episode six. What a great message for all the bullies…just keep bullying and you’ll get what you want. 

Again, reread OS’s interviews. He was doing the Hollywood double speak. Says just enough to keep you hooked with hope to get you to watch even when he knew all along it wasn’t lasting. It really was as clear as day if you go back and read what he said. 

Also, if you thought Buck was going to get into a meaningful long-term relationship, then you didn’t watch the video from the You Tuber “Call Me Chato” that TM posted on his Facebook. The video was all about characters and how they should always stay fundamentally the same with minimal development - I’m paraphrasing. However, Buck is the golden retriever, heart so big it gets broken, character who will remain on a hamster wheel and unlucky in love because that’s who he is. If he changes too much it shifts the dynamic, which only happens if the show was ending. 

If you thought the writers would do justice to a bisexual story, then you haven’t been watching the show closely. There’s been minimal Buck/Tommy relationship development on screen. Taylor got more. Viewers were lucky to get crumbs in the limited screen time Buck and Tommy got. Then, a breakup out of left field? One minute Buck is saying Tommy is it for him and he wants him to move in, and then it’s over? If he truly felt deeply for Tommy, why not fight to keep him? Why give up so easily and let him walk away? What’s the point? Also, to end it on a terrible stereotype is yet another clue. Horrible writing and another sign that TM and OS had zero investment in the relationship. The whole break up was rushed and made no sense. Essentially, it was just used to draw people in and to get Buck single and sleeping around again because that’s who he is. I for one won’t care for any of Buck’s future relationships. I mean, why would I when they never last. 

Also, writers that give you a 66-year-old police sergeant and a 10 y/o boy landing a heavily damaged plane on an active freeway in LA with no prior training, and sorry playing video game flight simulators is not training, is some Sharknado level writing, which is not a compliment. Oh, and that whole story was truly the shows “jumping the shark” moment. If you don’t know what the term “jumping the shark” means, look it up and try to tell me I’m wrong. 

Not having Tommy involved in the three part premier episodes, other than a few minutes at a birthday party, was so obvious as to the show’s intent. I mean, the fake captain from Hotshots got more screen time. 

They claim they wanted someone for Buck that was connected to him and the 118 and then you don’t use the character at all. You wanted Buck off the hamster wheel? What a crock! Such a wasted opportunity.

Since it’s been confirmed episode 6 was filmed before 5, Tim’s just playing god with peoples’ feelings and crushing their hearts at this point. I mean, how do you have such a great episode (5) and a wonderful speech by Josh (6) just to break them up? Plus, having Tommy break up after six months? That man was all in, which was obvious in episode 5.

Guess it shouldn’t be a surprise that’s how TM would handle things after that horrible Tarlos breakup. At least on Lone Star we knew Rafa (Carlos) was a main cast member so there was hope. Lou was a guest star so it seems kinda final based on his interviews. Again, what was the point? They could have had Buck's bi revelation be with a random character. So, building up the Buck/Tommy relationship just to take it away was to inflict the most pain. Good job. 

Do I think the show will make Buddie canon? Who knows…one thing I do know is I wouldn’t trust them if they did. Also, even if Tommy somehow returns, I don’t trust TM with anything related to this story. Sure, hope he’s happy with ruining the show for so many people. Again, like another show runner I mentioned in item 4 above. Honestly, I can’t believe the Buddie fans have stayed for so long. That’s commitment, I guess. 

Do I think Lou should go back to 9-1-1? Hell no! He was screwed over by both TM and OS. Prove it to me otherwise. However, it’s up to him and of course, he loves acting so I wouldn’t blame him.

Finally, even though I’ve watched the show since the beginning, it no longer brings me joy. There are too many other TV shows to stick with one I no longer enjoy. So yes, I’m announcing my departure, and I don’t give an F what OS, you, or anyone else thinks about it. Not that any of this matters any way…

[symphonyofmars]

There was something I wanted to add as i saw people arguing back and forth (and this might be against my better judgement): but I believe the first post I saw referenced Bell Hooks, and then I later saw someone else say that the use of her quote was bullshit. The quote had to do with being compassionate towards men, and then the person responding said that wasn't what the quote is about (iirc, it's been a few days and my sense of time is not great) but having read The Will to Change (which I believe the quote was taken from), that's exactly what it was about.

[adding a read more because this became much longer than I intended it to be]

The book discusses how the patriarchy hurts not just women, but ALSO men, and how it's so much harder to rehabilitate men from it because: they think they stand something to gain from cramming themselves into the box they're supposed to fit into, and, many of them just have no idea that their life could even be different. That they could be an artist if they want to, they could dance if they want to, they could go into childcare if they want to or grow their hair long or write poetry or paint their nails-- that there are no "boy colors" and "girl colors", that there are no "men's jobs" and "women's jobs", that they could just do what they want because it makes them happy. They don't even know that being happy is more important than filling their sociological niche that someone else has carved out for them. It reminds me when I learned the story of Siddhartha Gautama when I was little, and that he had no idea that poverty, sickness, and suffering even existed because he had never been outside the palace walls and, not that I'm saying every man can achieve nirvana in an afternoon (or even in a lifetime), sometimes someone who knows what's outside the walls has to let you know that there is even something beyond the walls.

Which is also not to say that women need to be doing all the work for men. I spent ten years trying to disabuse a man of the "things he has to do to be manly" and it ended with him breaking up with me and joining a trad christian cult.

Some men (like my ex) are just extremely resistant to change because change is terrifying, but they also have this sense of Sunk Cost Fallacy, where if they were doing this thing the whole time and it's not working, then what were they wasting their time on?? (I feel like you see this with a lot of evangelical/trad Christians as well, where the idea that they might have been wrong is so scary that they double down on their beliefs in the hope that it will work out for them.)

But, there are also men like a book reviewer I was watching a few days ago (whose name I don't know), who admitted that he really had no idea women were catcalled as much as we say we are, until he was grocery shopping with his girlfriend and she went into the next aisle (literally like five feet away, just with the wall of food between them) and he heard a man catcall her. Like, the second she walked away from him and she no longer obviously belonged to him (in the mind of horrible men like her catcaller) she was suddenly fair game to be harassed in public. And he said that he never didn't believe his girlfriend, but to witness something makes it so much more real. To use my "wall" metaphor another way: he and so many men are still inside the palace, experiencing what they think is the same life others experience, while women are outside of the walls, struggling. The incident of hearing his girlfriend (who is an adult women and who shouldn't need him constantly around as protection from horrible men) being treated like an object while she's by herself was like someone grabbing his hand and pulling him outside the walls without even asking if he wanted to go, showing him a truth that can only be experienced by someone who is not him.

Back to Bell Hooks because there was something I wanted to add: yes she does say that it is at least partly the job of feminists to help to deprogram men. Men, as a group, have been brainwashed to think that they have to be The Provider, The Protector, The Leader, and not all of them are good at providing, protecting, or leading. Maybe some of them want to do the things I mentioned before like care for others (in the way we would describe as "maternal" and attribute to women), maybe they want to create art or do crafts or other things not considered "traditionally masculine", and that's not even taking into account that the "traditional idea" of a man is to be constantly wanting sex, and that men could never be sexually assaulted because they're in a constant state of wanting to fuck (obviously this is a lie; anyone can be sexually assaulted, and not everyone wants to fuck). You can't just take a dog who was taught only to fight and put it in a house of children, it won't know how to act around them and might attack them: it needs to be rehabilitated first.

And Bell Hooks does note, that the problem with trying to deprogram men comes from how they're raised. I'd like to submit this video about men and empathy, since I've already typed a bunch:

When I was reading The Will To Change and I got up to the part about her dad, I realized how different my dad is. And, because you don't get to choose your parents, I consider myself very lucky that my dad has always been unconditional in his love. For a moment I almost found this strange because his older brother was the "golden child" and his younger brother was "the baby", so he should have been somewhat neglected because they always got more affection from their parents, but I think it's because he was the favorite of his four girl cousins who would take him everywhere and fight over him (even now, he's the one they're excited to see and they shittalk the other two lol). So, I have a sneaking suspicion that the only reason he didn't end up shitty like his brothers, is because when he was a child he had four girls who were showing him what unconditional love was like and that you don't need to meet the criteria of your niche in order to receive love.

Which, I have to thank them for, because it's so much easier not having to decide whether or not I want to talk to my own parents as an adult because they've gone Fox News Insane. Both my parents will actually ask me about things they don't understand - like trans rights, queer rights in general, voting (I made them a paper of who/what to vote for for the election since the props always need extra research), geopolitical things - and I've even caught my dad making fun of conspiracy theorists and the thinking that trans women are ruining sports (he's a big sports guy and he mostly watches women's bball because he likes that they actually have to play as a team in a team sport). Life is a lot easier when both parents have empathy and don't have to be convinced to care about others.

And I think that's why the OG post I saw quoted Bell Hooks, because the "we need to rehabilitate men otherwise we can't have the feminist future we want" contingent of feminism never really took off; there was one-- I believe they were originally called "Meninists" as in "men who are feminists" and I've seen a picture of them from a parade in the 70s, but it died out because they were fighting such an uphill battle trying to convince other men to join. So now, we have more women who are independent and who have de-centered men from their lives, but also a bunch of men who were never rehabbed and who don't know their life doesn't need to revolve around "being a man." Being a man means being strong, it means being able to provide, it means being attractive; and the Tates and Fresh and Fits and all the other scam artists of the world sell them this on steroids: buy my book and you WILL be hot, you WILL be a millionaire, you WILL have women who want to fuck you...

Never mind that those guys are probably on actual steroids, they only have that money from scamming other men, and many of them have been found to hire escorts (which, there's nothing wrong with hiring sex workers, but there's a difference between selling the idea that you'll be so charismatic that women will throw themselves at you and having to hire a sex worker because your personality is so bad that no one wants to go near you.)

They're selling a false ideal to men who don't even know it's false in the first place.

But going back to Ms Hooks again: she did talk a great deal about how we need to raise our boys (as a society). She talks about how the whole thing of telling a nine-year old "Take care of your mother" is an insane notion, because he's nine and he can't do anything, and she's an adult woman who is actually the caretaker; and about how boy babies are treated so differently even to the point of "baby boys should not cry as much as baby girls". Like, the gender requirements are there before they can even talk, no wonder they're so damaged and hard to convince of anything later in life.

Reads with Rachel and her husband, Carlos, had two really good discussions about masculinity; one about real masculinity vs performed masculinity as they compared two books about being a man:

As Rachel says after Carlos complained about being made fun of for cleaning his nails after working on his car ("I work an office job and I have cleanliness standards"): "It's not enough for you to know how to work on a car, you also have to be dirty in order to be the manliest man."

The other is in the context of talking about how Patrick Rothfuss isn't the feminist he thinks he is because he still wants the women around him to perform femininity so he can perform masculinity and feel like "a big strong man" before going into a general discussion about masculinity (from about 9:01 to 53:55):

Together they ask a really good question (pardon me if I don't remember it verbatim): "Why does it take someone acting in a particular role for you to feel like a man?" And it's easier for Carlos to be able to deal with that question, because he started deconstructing from the patriarchy when he was 25 (he said he's 32 at the time of that video). It's something he and Rachel have done together as they learn and grow and live their lives together, him deconstructing from the patriarchy and her deconstructing from her fundamentalist christian upbringing (which is basically just The Patriarchy, but More, and +God.) And they've done this because they came to realize their upbringing was wrong, and they didn't want to raise their sons to be saddled with the same baggage that they both grew up with that made their lives worse.

So yeah, I forgot where I was going with this anymore since finding the one video took so long. The majority of men are resistant to changing their mind and it's because they were raised to be unemotional and not care about others but, sometimes, if maybe you've been friends with someone a while and take the time to explain something in a way they understand, you can change someone's mind. Story time:

I was a mod for a streamer for about a month and a half roundabouts January to February of this year (I ended up leaving because trying to get a bunch of randos to behave was stressful - esp since the streamer's rules weren't clear - and I ended up not really liking the streamer as a person). One person in the discord said that they hated the phrase "It's not my job to educate you" because it was condescending. I defended it as people being tired of having to explain shit to people just because they're black or trans or a woman but a bunch of people latched on and started saying anti-left things, which was weird because the streamer and his discord were supposed to be leftist (it's part of why I left, he was just weirdly antagonistic towards leftist ideals despite calling himself a leftist and he was attracting some *ahem* weird types). Anyway, a day goes by and a trans person comes in and says something like "I don't think I should have to explain my existence to random people on the street just because I decided to go outside," and a bunch of people descended on them, telling them they were wrong, and I'm pretty sure they ended up leaving the server.

[Like, the original group-agreed-upon argument came down to "I shouldn't have to google things or look up books to read or do my own work to discover anything new about the world, I should be able to demand of a random person's time and energy, even though I'm not giving off the vibe of someone who is actually ready to listen" and when I pointed out that people know when someone is and is not ready to listen, the streamer himself asked me how I knew and I was like like "do you think that I, a woman in her 30s, is somehow incapable of being able to discern intent?" Most women and queer folk KNOW who's a bad actor before they open their mouth, the idea that any of us wouldn't was just wildly ignorant.]

I complained to my friend (who I had met in the server) that the streamer was wrong and everyone's reaction was bullshit and, at first, he agreed with the position that a trans person should be prepared to debate people on their own rights if they deign to step outside their home. I countered with "You know, [streamer] doesn't it get it because he's a straight white man. He's the default. Other straight white men already know what it's like to be a straight white man so they have no questions for him. But to be trans or otherwise queer or a woman or any other person outside of a white man, is to have people question whether you have a right to be where you are. Trans women I've known have told me that they've had complete randos ask them if they've had bottom surgery and just-- how is that their business? People act so invasive towards non-straight non-white non-men in a way that no one does towards straight white men that they literally just can't understand what it's like to have your existence questioned just because you went outside. Asking a stranger if they've had bottom surgery is LITERALLY sexual harassment, and no one would ever walk up to someone like [streamer] and ask him like, "How big is your dick?" or something of a similar nature because that's just insane behavior, but when it's a trans person or a woman, it's suddenly okay? Like why do you think that is?" And my comparison to how white men are treated vs everyone else, and my stance that asking a stranger if they've had bottom surgery is sexual harassment (it is, no one needs to know about your genitalia) got through to him and he agreed with me. Awhile later I even heard him saying something similar to someone else about a situation that was similar and taking up the stance that I had given him.

So like... yeah, I probably wouldn't do that for a random man on the internet who is determined to hate me, but I can do it for a friend who I know might be receptive to what I have to say to him, and help steer him away from opinions that could end up dragging him down the wrong path.

As this post's OP said: "it's not saying you HAVE to do it! it's saying you CAN do it!"

It's up to you if you want to try effecting the people around you, but if they've dug in their heels that much then it's okay if you want to leave and not speak to them again. Just know that, it's only so hard for you because they were brainwashed since birth to think the way they think and that's REALLY hard to undo. And that's not a pass, that's just the reason why this is so fucking hard for the rest of us (when they're adults and harder to reason with because they're so invested) and also, the reason why mothers of sons need to maybe rethink how they're raising them. Like, don't raise them with "boy colors" and "girl colors" raise them with "colors." Dance isn't something a girl does, it's something a body does. Women don't cook because cooking is a woman's thing, people cook because they want to eat. And... I'll be honest, I've known a few women who are just so mean to their husbands in a "why can't you be a real man?" way, and I just DON'T see how that makes him want to be a better person, but then again, those woman probably need as much deprogramming as their husbands do since they just keep reinforcing something that (she may not even be aware) is hurting them both.

So yeah, sorry if this was a bit rambling, but seeing people fight back and forth for the past week and seeing people take up some really... Mad Max-ian, like, ultra-anarcho-capitalist positions of "we shouldn't help any man at all, fuck em!" was really weird when it was being said by people who purport themselves as being feminists when feminist ethics is supposed to be more compassionate. There were just a handful of reactions I saw that seemed very "pull yourself up out of the patriarchy by your bootstraps" but like... what if their boots don't have bootstraps? What if they don't even have shoes on? What if they don't even know they could have shoes?

posts about the alt-right pipeline being compassionate towards young men while radical leftists shun and shame them are not fucking saying "the men are becoming violent because feminists are too mean!" and if that is your takeaway you need to get off tumblr until you've better honed your critical thinking skills.

those posts are talking about how effective the language and approach you take in your activism can be. this is literally cult deprogramming 101. if someone is being taken in by a violent or dangerous group, that violent or dangerous group is usually offering them compassion and solace while working hard to convince them everyone else in the world is their enemy. you are under no obligation to coddle or act compassionate toward these men and their violent ideologies, but if you have the means to try, it is something that you can do to make a tangible difference.

radicalized people are often only one loving friend or family member or external voice away from being de-radicalized. of course that is not always the case, but it very often is. a lot of y'all rightfully understand that you do not carry the burden of being that voice, but a lot of y'all also have a lot of internalized ideas about morals and punitive justice and have simply written off these people as deserving of only the worst and not worth saving.

ten years ago, my grandmother was a fox news watching republican who voted red in every election and very well could have fallen down the qanon rabbit hole if not for me and her daughter challenging her compassionately, walking her through hypotheticals that validated her feelings & proving why they were false, & being patient with her despite our extreme division in political ideology. it was frustrating fucking work! but i decided i wanted to do it, because i could see the horizon and i could see me making a difference!

"misogynists have been saying feminists are too mean for years, get new material" that is not the fucking POINT. the point is that you, feminist, can be the compassionate voice that guides your brother, your father, your cousin, your grandfather away from fucking becoming or staying a nazi. you can show them compassion and companionship. you can be the woman they think of when their alt-right bros try to convince them that women are the enemy. and you can choose to crystallize that image of yourself so wholly in their mind's eye as worth protecting that they may very well choose to reject those harmful ideas.

it's not saying you HAVE to do it! it's saying you CAN do it! don't you 'firebomb a walmart' people all love taking change into your own hands? where the fuck is that energy right now, huh?

[knightoflodis]

When you work in a field where equipment is installed and controlled, you get a bit of a feel for the practicality of that stuff. Granted. A lot of my experience is from the fact that I am basically a contractor, my company wants to make as much money as possible, and most of our customers want to save money. And the things that you have to keep in mind that it isn’t just the equipment that costs money. The labor also costs money in the form of work hours and in the form of more experienced workers are more expensive. And if you want something to be more complicated in function, that’s going to cost even more money. So. Depending on who wants to add more security and whom is being hired to add more security can change a lot of things. You could have the “money is no obstacle” kind of customer, but if you do that there is a chance that the contractors are going to “waste” money, by either taking their time because they know there is no money limit, by buying unnecessary extra equipment because they will get paid more, and by pocketing things.

Granted. With this originally story you could have them do a single laser grid as security protection. And then have the people breaking in just find a way to tunnel in on the other side of the laser grid.

"Why do we make laser grids like these?" "What do you mean?" "I mean instead of a messy random arrangement of lasers that a nimble intruder might be able to jump through, why not a simple grid wall with no gaps large enough to allow a person to pass through?"

[mr-ys-phantasma]

🌙 Moon Phases 🌙

Agatha Harkness X Fem!Reader

Word Count: 1369

Chapter 40:

You all turned to look at Billy, who grabbed his little spell book from his body bag. "At least we have our personal items."

Immediately, you rushed to check your body bags, all bearing similar expressions of relief by being reunited with your pendants.

You wore your own necklace, the light metal cold against your flushing skin, and adrenaline still coursing through your pumping veins. Your fingers gently brushed the three moon phases, and you closed your eyes, taking a deep breath.

Wearing it, somehow, made you feel more secure and safe; a placebo effect that helped calm you down a little more and allow your head to be clearer.

The moment was interrupted, though by the sound of the morgue drawers being pulled back into place, the knocking sound almost startling you.

If that was not enough, the growing lights above you started to flicker before one shut down.

"The countdown," you exclaimed, eyes following the circle formed by the lights; while wondering how quick each light would turn off after the other.

Deep inside your instincts were telling you that the time would not last long, not as long as the other trials.

Agatha noticed that Jen was rather quiet, not panicking like usual. Instead, Agatha swore Jen was actually thinking of something for a change.

"You seem relaxed." She called her out. "Usually, at this point, you're either complaining loudly or freaking out loudly."

Jen gave her a hard look, clearly not in the mood for her annoying antics. "I'm thinking."

"Oh. About what?

"How to save your ass."

"Pardon?"

"I couldn't save Lilia. I didn't even try to save Alice. I'll be damned if I let you three idiots die."

You placed a hand on your waist as you looked at her, clearly not happy being called an Idiot or any of your companions being called that.

However, you held back any remark for the moment. It was the first time you saw Jen actually putting others above herself, when all those trials she had been selfish and the first to go when given the chance.

And considering you once again needed to work together somehow to make it through, this worked in your favour.

Of course, Agatha did not seem to share your thoughts.

"Wow. Such a purpose. How are you gonna do that without any magic?" She questioned, in the mood for an argument.

"Agatha, that's enough," you said, no authority coming from your voice much to your dismay.

Your body was still on edge, and it was taking a lot of mental training to remain calm and try to think of a solution, rather than letting your emotions and your haunting memories get the best of you.

Thankfully, you were not the only one ready to defend Jen.

"Y/N is right!" Billy said, putting his foot down. "She saved you from poisoning. She saved all of us. All while bound." He looked at Jen and offered a weak smile. "Maybe you don't need it."

Jen wanted to believe him, but she had a hard time too. Not that you blamed her. Your magic might be sort of a curse and a blessing to you, but you can not imagine your life without it.

"Well, if that's true, that means I've wasted the last century of my life." Jen commented. "That doctor in Boston didn't take anything from me. I gave it up."

It was then that you all noticed Agatha fidgeting faintly by tuning her fingers together and avoiding eye contact.

Unlike the others, you knew she acted that way when she knew something but refused to tell. Something that actually made her feel guilty, even slightly.

"Ags," you called her out, but she did not look you in the eyes. "You know something," she was about to argue, but you beat her to it. "I know that face and that fidgeting. I know what it means"

Defeated, Agatha started to throw parts of a story that matched Jen's story, and everyone made the connection.

"I didn't know it was you! It was the 1920s. I did the odd spell for bank notes. I don't know. The patriarchy really shelled out to shush a lady. It was bind or burn!" She justified herself, or so she tried.

For Jen was furious finding out the truth, and she had every right to be. With anger blinding her, she rushed to Agatha and even pulled a thick lock of her hair in one strong pull.

Agatha didn't even flinch at the pull, having built quite a pain tolerance thanks to Rio. She didn't even fight when Jen tied her wrists together with that strand of hair.

She might not react to it, but you were about to. No matter what took place back then, seeing Jen ripping out Agatha's hair like that made your protective instincts hit in.

Forgetting your own anxiety caused by the closed room, you were about to move and tackle Jen; having forgotten your powers worked normally.

Billy grabbed you by the waist and kept you back, surprised by your strength, considering he was taller than you and clearly heavier.

"Wait! Wait! Look!" He told you as he kept pulling you away from the two witches. "Yhe unbinding ritual."

This made you stop your fighting and look, realizing he was right. The strand of hair and the wrapped wrists were the basis for the ritual.

Jen was not trying to harm Agatha, you realized. She was trying to break the binds that kept her magic dormant and get back what was sealed away a century ago.

You calmed down, and Billy let you go. He stood right behind you, and the two of you watched as Jen repeated the same mantra again and again.

You hold nothing.

You hold nothing.

You hold nothing.

Each time that phrase was spoken with more power, with mode determination... with more need to work.

Jen's voice cracked, but she kept going, holding on every beat of hope that was left within her... one last chance to get back what was stolen from her.

In the end, it seemed to work based on Jen's expression.

Her face changed from shock to realisation and she could not help but fall on her knees, arms cradled in front of her chest and let out gasps and faint cries of hapiness; pink magic coming alive from her palms.

The sight broke your heart, seeing how Jen truly felt finally having her magic back.

Magic for witches was their essence, their core, and their will to live. It was part of them and having it sealed away, unable to sense it... to recreate this feeling of power and mysticism that existed within...

It was a fate worse than death.

Suddenly, Jen disappeared right in front of your eyes.

"What?" You exclaimed and rubbed your eyes, fearing your mind was playing tricks with you.

"Where did she go?" Billy asked next.

"Out of here," Agatha replied in a soft tone, deep down actually feeling happiness for Jen; capable of actually taking back what she was looking for.

You frowned. "But we are not done with the trials, yet"

Agatha looked at you, her gaze softening. "She is done with it. Her trial has already passed, and she got what she wanted."

You felt the need to argue but stopped yourself. The Road was a place unknown, and not even you or Agatha or Rio knew much about it. Each time it worked differently, each time seemed to make up something new.

So, who says the trials were not shortened? Or perhaps, it was giving a chance for some to find what they are looking for and be free without having to finish the road.

This was a comforting thought, deep down wanting to end this and get out.

The fact remained, though, how were you going to find what you are looking for? When you pretty much had nothing to work with and unlike Jen; there was no binding whatsoever that could be broken.

Chapter 41

[dangermousie]

Top Dozen cdramas - 2024

This can obviously change but nothing truly exciting looks to air for the rest of the year so that's unlikely. My Top Dozen for the year are likely be set in stone.

It's a very idiosyncratic list which has two mini dramas, three moderns (!!! for me that's insane) and a lot of vibes dramas.

12 Hard to Find - all vibes all the times. A tragic romance that feels like a Gothic fairytale, this is what minidramas could be.

11 Love In the Desert - out of all the dramas on this list, this is the one that screams most "a good time." It's a romance and visual feast and webnovel madness and sexy good time and it made me cry.

10 Fortune Writer - a mini that is so smart and meta and fun about narratives and fate and villainy and fighting the story itself. So clever.

9 Derailment - a puzzle and a love story, telling most anything about it would be a spoiler but this story about a rich girl from 2025 who seemingly wakes up in a parallel universe in 2023 in body of a poor doppelganger, and the young man who was in love with the original has everything including addressing what it must feel to people to have a transmigrator possess a loved one.

8 Tender Light - the ending was just - it's the reason it's not n1. But the rest of this drama about an abused wife and an idealistic young man refusing to bow to societal pressure was just exquisite. It addresses morality and loneliness and complicity and sacrifice. Just incredible. Poetry in motion.

7 Will Love In Spring - a modern romance cdrama? In my list? Is the world ending? But seriously, this is such a gorgeous, realistic yet intense exploration of love and loss and trauma. It made me utterly reevaluate Li Xian to boot.

6 Snowfall - this is such a fever dream of a mood piece of a vampire romance, with seriously BDSM and gay vibes, as well as utterly incredible canon age gap ride or die OTP with Ouyang Nana bothering to act for the first time in her life and Vengo Gao embodying a gentleman vampire to perfection. Li Muge remains one of my favorite directors for a reason.

5 Heroes - the story of three very different men all consigned to the dustheap of history by changing times (the best swordsman in the era of guns, a former imperial guard of a regime about to be overthrown, a constable obedient to obsolete code who studied for imperial exams which got abolished) as the Qing dynasty is about to fall, this has fights, humor, three (!) separate love stories, philosophy and utter and complete heartbreak. The performances, the ideas, the filming and the writing all combine to make a bleak masterpiece with a 99% death rate (I am not kidding, only tertiaries make it out.) If I were in charge, it would get all the awards.

4 The Legend of Shen Li - the one truly mainstream idol costume hit on the list. It's an adult, passionate xianxia that reunites Zhao Liying and Lin Gengxin as deities and battle powerhouses in a love story that is so full of yearning and passion and intensity I feel like peeking through my fingers. This is everything xianxia romance tries to be and almost never is. This just might be my favorite xianxia of all time, tbh.

3 Eternal Brotherhood - a dark horse whose existence I didn't even know about before it aired. Visually stunning despite its tiny budget, this narrative about three sworn brothers in a kingdom and world in crisis, is pitch perfect in its humor, its intensity, its tragedy and its themes (also THREE!!!! amazing love stories despite not being a romance-centric show.) The battles, the friendships, the traumas, the darkness at the heart of it all!

2 Fangs of Fortune - the sole drama that can rival JoL2 for me (only caveat is it's still airing), this is visually the most jaw dropping drama I've ever seen, but it's also high fantasy the way it should be - making me feel so immersed that stopping feels like coming up from a deep dive or waking up from a hypervivid dream. It has impeccable performances (many from actors who I don't normally even like), and its plot and relationships and themes - fate and sacrifice and choice and found family bonds and trauma and so many other things - make it feel as if it was made just for me.

1 Joy of Life 2 - THE drama of 2024 for me. It's somehow better than the incredible first installment. It's funny, it's heartbreaking, it has insane performances, a narrative that hits all my personally favorite themes (a person trying to remain human in an inhuman world, righteousness not being weak), a large cast of fascinating characters who feel like they live in front of me (there are no throwaway roles in this), my favorite ship of the year (though it's not even a ship-centric show) and above all, Zhang Ruoyun's live wire of a performance as Fan Xian, arguably my favorite cdrama character of all time. It should not work yet it does. Brilliantly.

[waterlooletterwrb]

First, mpreg was literally created as a trope for cis people that couldn't imagine a world were men naturally could get pregnant, because they couldn't consider that trans men existed. For them it was easier creating the "what if men gave birth through their ass" than "men can have uteruses and vaginas and still be men". So they stole a reality that has trans protagonism to put cis in replacement. Sure, you can enjoy it, whatever, but know what you're defending.

Second, particularly, I understand not wanting to read something because of trauma, it's totally ok. But saying that a story with trans men getting pregnant is because they're replacements for women and about their reproductive organs alone was terrible harmful (and potentially transphobic). Trans stories can also talk about pregnancy, they're not less important or less "trans stories" because of it. There's a lot of trans men and transmasc nonbinary getting pregnant because they want to, and this doesn't make them less trans men and transmasc. (And yes, you being genderqueer doesn't change the fact that saying trans fics with pregnancy are somehow replacements for women fics and that they weren't part of "trans stories" was messed up, and I say that also as a transmasc genderqueer person. Being honest, even if you wanted to say just "mpreg is a replacement for women" wouldn't be truly ok and kinda misogynistic).

I would say I'm sorry that my joke belittling mpreg was offensive to you (again: you can like whatever you want), but at same time I never expected a trans person to defend something that steals from our voice. Genderqueer is an identity of protest, activism fight and for political means. This means in all instances of your life, even something like this minor thing (thats not really minor if you think it through about the importance of making sure people remember we exist instead of getting our narratives and making it theirs). I hope you haven't forgotten it.

Adar: Do you know what he offered me? Children.

half the fandom at that phraseology:

the other half:

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 88 (Bringing Home a Ghost)

After Ghost Night ended at the Salty Paw, Heather, Conrad, and their new friend Felix Psyded left Fisherman's Wharf and returned to their home on Sable Square. Heather entered first, finding Hazel on the sofa watching TV. "Hey, how were the kids tonight?"

"They were great! Ashy said you guys usually read him two bedtime stories but he fell asleep after the first one, and Lava hasn't woken up since I put her to bed. I got to watch Moonlight Massacre after all! How was your night?"

"It was nice! We went looking for a man we didn't find, but we met someone else while we were there..."

Conrad walked inside the front door as Felix floated in behind them. Heather stood, as Hazel looked up from her phone in quiet awe. "Felix Psyded, Esquire. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, miss."

"Hazel Moody-Nesbitt," she replied. "Heather's cooler younger sister. You're, like, really a ghost!"

"Since 1915." He warmly tipped his bowler hat. "May I say, you're stunning like your sister."

"You may say! But I'm married."

"Of course the lovely Nesbitt women would all be spoken for. Though I hope your husband is friendlier than Sargent Gordon."

Hazel laughed. "My wife is sweet, but Conrad's great! Are you the one guy in the world he doesn't get along with?"

Heather sighed, sliding over to make room for Conrad on the sofa. "They got off on the wrong foot."

"Well, why'd you bring him home? I know you love strays, but I didn't think that meant people who've been dead for over a century!"

"They've promised me a plate of ambrosia in exchange for my services."

Hazel gaped. "When you guys said you were doing this challenge I just thought it was, like, a team building exercise. I didn't think you were really going to resurrect anybody!"

Heather shrugged. "Well, why shouldn't we? We went through all that to learn how to do it, so we might as well help someone with unfinished business while were at it."

"So is that it, then? No one dies, they just get to live again with ambrosia?"

"Not everyone's unfinished business is to live again. Some die so old, with bodies so used and broken, living again isn't worth it. Even some of the younger ones. Everyone is different and fascinating in their own way, which is why I took to studying ghosts and their stories in the first place."

"He's going to help us figure out if Conrad met a ghost out on Deadgrass Isle."

Hazel grinned as Conrad stood to shoo one of their chickens back outside. "You're fighting crime by day and paranormal activity by night? Holly was right, Conrad. You're basically a superhero."

He blushed, and Felix turned a dour look in his direction. Ending the tense conversation in the living room, Hazel left to return home.

Heather and Conrad left Felix on the sofa and headed to bed. But before they'd changed into pajamas, she blurted her question with concern. "What's going on with you? I've never seen you snappier with anyone than you were tonight with Felix. Like I brought home two ghosts tonight instead of one."

"He was kind of acting like a dick."

Heather nodded. "And you met him there. That's not like you. Is it George Brindleton again?"

"No, George has been quiet. He and his wife spend a lot of the winter in Sulani every year." He could see Heather found this insufficient and kept talking. "I'm just dealing with a lot. I know I wasn't really myself tonight. There's this one case I can't crack and it's making me a little crazy."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I do, but I can't say much about it."

"I know. Confidential. But I want to give you whatever you need to be able to keep your work life at work, and not take the stress home. Not even for me and the kids, because you're so good to us. That's not the issue. I'm worried about you, and I want you to talk to me. The night we got engaged, you promised you would always tell me how you're feeling."

Joining her on the bed, he held her hand against his chest. "When I've finally solved the case, I'll tell you everything. I promise."

She grinned. "Not every gory detail, I hope."

"Do I ever? I don't want to think about the case tonight. I don't want to think about the ghost in our living room. All I want to focus on the rest of the night is you."

They made love before Heather fell asleep in Conrad's arms, (at least temporarily) satisfied by their conversation. ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 1 Summary | Gen 1 Start

NOTE: I debated whether or not to bring Felix Psyded and his lore into this generation because there's a university generation much, much later in this challenge, but Felix was the first ghost that showed up to Ghost Night, sat right next to them and was immediately enamoured with Heather. So my mind spun with a bunch of possibilities for him and I went for it, even though he's mentioned in urban legends for UBrite students and those obviously won't be canon to my timeline anymore.

The In Bloom challenge doesn't have anything related to Felix in the challenge rules, even in the university generation, and Reaper Rewards didn't even require use of the ambrosia Heather made. But I wasn't going to do all that and not fully finish what they started. They're not really the type to lure sims into a cowplant just to test whether ambrosia works, no one in my save needed to die and be brought back, and I have a plan now for Felix! @pixeldistractions mentioned a possible prequel flashback and I'll never say never, but setting up an early-20th Century photo save will take a while if I do it, so no promises. I am invested in him getting a happy ending to his second life, however!

[sepublic]

I think there’s a lot of implications to Evelyn that people ignore in favor of making her into their white everyman’s Manic Pixie Dream Girl instead of like, an actual character with motives who came to the human world for a reason.

There’s the very obvious implication that she made the archway in Gravesfield??? The one that uses Titan’s Blood to open a temporary portal each time? And there’s another archway located by her house; I dunno if Evelyn made it herself, or if she had parents who were just never shown because they’re not too important to the story.

Evelyn obviously would’ve been a child when she visited Gravesfield as well, because there’s no way the writers would have her romance with Caleb begin if only one of them was a minor. So that points to her being a kid prodigy, which is something you can see in her descendants Eda and Lilith (Yes, Lilith as well; She’s very skilled herself and even figured out Glyph combos, it’s just that she’s being compared to Eda constantly and let her inferiority complex downplay herself).

But how did Evelyn even get to the human realm in the first place if the other archway hadn’t been built? Did she just magically connect hers to a pre-existing human archway?

We know Eclipse Lake exists, it’s how Philip entered the Boiling Isles, and others in the Demon Realm knew of it. Plenty of witches speculated on how a permanent portal to and from the human realm worked; So interdimensional travel was already a field that wild witches in the Deadwardian Era were interested in.

Portals in this show are two-way, so Evelyn must’ve entered Eclipse Lake, emerged somewhere in what would be known in the present as the Connecticut area, and then wandered until she came across some humans… And alas, she came across some of the worst humans to ever exist, RIP.

She made Flapjack, and Palismen you create don’t awaken until you state your wish. If Flapjack resonated with Hunter for sharing Caleb’s wish, then he must’ve resonated with Caleb for sharing Evelyn’s wish; To decide her own future. Flapjack himself is introduced trying to leave and go places, despite people telling him to stay put.

Caleb is someone for whom that wish came in leaving his ‘home’ in Gravesfield, he’d already moved there from someplace else prior! When Evelyn is established to be someone skilled in interdimensional travel, is there not an obvious connection to be made between this and her shared dynamic in Caleb, and the Palisman who resonated with both?

Did Evelyn live with her parents? Was she by herself as a kid? When a teenage Eda runs to the human realm to escape her complicated relationship with her parents, is it the same as her ancestor? The Boiling Isles was never perfect (but the coven system was an objective downgrade), and Dana even mentioned it herself at one point. Its people are just as humans as humans, and so just as capable of being messy and flawed and even cruel. The Coven Heads were willing to fuse their realm with ours under the expectation they'd be treated like royalty for it.

Like Gus, did Evelyn find human detritus and become interested this way? Like Luz, did Evelyn hope she could escape her problems in one world by finding another? I wonder what magic Evelyn liked? Probably stuff to do with portals (Eda uses them in the first episode), teleportation, warping space, etc.

With all this in mind, with Evelyn already being established as someone who can create portal devices, Philip’s tendency to plagiarize and take credit, his inability to make a second portal without using the first one as a base, and the portal itself being found right by Evelyn’s home and archway…

What if Evelyn made the portal, with Caleb’s help. It does change the context of these notes in Philip’s journal, if they’re transcribed from those of Evelyn, a wild witch who revered the Titan and her way of life.

Evelyn went through Eclipse Lake, traveled until she found Gravesfield; Evelyn posed as a human and trusted Caleb after seeing how he and Flapjack got along. Evelyn built a working archway and when Gravesfield suspected a witch in their presence —possibly due to her experiments— they went on a hunt for her.

Evelyn revealed her identity to Caleb and Philip, and brought the former to her world, possibly as a test run or to celebrate its completion, before bringing him back to Gravesfield. Evelyn and Caleb would meet in secret for their own safety, communicating via rebuses, as Caleb stayed in Gravesfield until Philip was old enough to take care of himself, and/or even changed his mind and went along!

But he didn’t, and if Philip tried to do something about the archway, Evelyn still had Eclipse Lake. She might’ve even made the Portal by this point and that’s how Philip has notes on it prior to reuniting with Caleb. So Caleb moved to her home (possibly after Evelyn showed up in his house using the Portal), and Philip eventually found the Eclipse Lake portal. But in those subsequent 5+ years, Evelyn used the Titan’s right eye to create a new portal, that would use a little bit of Titan’s Blood as a battery but not deplete it with each use.

Evelyn and Caleb programmed this portal to open in his childhood home where Caleb expected Philip to be, because he still hoped to have his brother with him and always had. Evelyn agreed to let this happen despite Philip clearly wanting her dead, even if he was not going to get Caleb implicated and killed to do so.

But Philip decided to cross that line, because at some point Evelyn and Caleb had a child, and knowing he was related to a mixed child pissed him off so bad. He pretended to be accepting, even as Evelyn and Caleb revealed a Portal and their plan to go back to him anyhow. Despite this, he attempted to murder Evelyn and/or Caleb anyway. Caleb died, and the Portal was damaged, but Evelyn chased off Philip. He eventually went back for Caleb’s body and stole it, and attempted to replicate the Portal that Evelyn and Caleb had showed off, believing he’d broken it beyond repair.

Evelyn decided she wanted nothing else to do with the human realm and buried the Portal; Maybe she left the option for anyone else who was still interested. Which gets me to another point, that maybe Evelyn made a grave mistake in accessing the human world, but let’s be real the onus is always on those who act in bad faith, not someone who acted in good faith and had that taken advantage of. But in the long, long run, even longer than 400 years, past the ending of the series…

Gus is not the first, but he might be more successful than Evelyn, and succeed where she failed. He’s a witch who was also fascinated in the human world, and now he’s cultivating a Human-Demon Realm Exchange Program, so both worlds can get to know each other, so people from both worlds can find new places. Because Evelyn’s portal was reclaimed by her ancestor, who did need it after all; And it led to Luz finding the isles, to Vee finding Gravesfield.

Luz and Vee were also taken advantage of to commit genocide, but Luz helped stop it. She helped right a great wrong in freeing the Collector and giving the Titan’s son a friend; Evelyn was a wild witch, so she would’ve respected the Titan, and did use his right eye to create the Portal. During that time, the Titan was also able to peer into both the human and demon realms, though he wouldn’t have had much reason to care about the human realm for a while.

(And if the Archivists ever return; There’s a Collector who could be very helpful in resolving that threat, who was freed thanks to the butterfly effect of Evelyn’s actions.)

So in the long run, perhaps centuries after the show ends? Maybe Evelyn did good after all. There’s a lot our worlds could learn from each other, and perhaps healing magic would’ve helped someone like Manny; If not him, others down the line. Plant magic could also be very helpful. The Collector was able to create a second Portal to establish more permanent contact through Caleb’s old home, as Evelyn intended. Not to mention the work of her descendants she had from meeting Caleb! And Gus is helping more Calebs and Evelyns find homes, just as Evelyn helped Caleb, Luz, and Vee.

[leavemetrappedinacage]

EVERYTHING WAS A MISTAKE — prologue.

Sumary: A fateful meeting with someone from your past brings painful revelations.

⤷ pairing: yandere!satoru gojo x fem!vampire!reader.

⤷ warnings: dubcon (kiss only), attempted suicide, description of blood, injury, threats, slight stalking (Satoru is chasing the reader around).

⤷ more information about story: here.

⤷ notes: this is my first time posting a fic and I'm a bit scared, I hope you enjoy it, I also decided to make each chapter a different color, the synopsis for example is pink, while this one is a pale green, almost yellow, I hope you don't mind. Have a great day!

⤷ word count: 3288.

Life is like a butterfly, ephemeral, beautiful, and above all, fragile. You watch people stumble on the pavement, your face reflects subtly in the glass of the window, fortunately people aren't able to see you from the outside, you'd like to warn them about a small incline in the pavement, you yourself have stumbled there many times before realising, you close your eyes and laugh until your cheeks hurt, not out of mockery, but out of shame at imagining how many people have seen you stumble.

The shop manager snaps her fingers in front of your face to get your attention, you cough and pull yourself together, you see a gleam of curiosity light up in her hazel eyes, you smile at her and tilt your head to the side subtly, she understands the signal and watches a wanderer trip and fall, she covers her mouth with both hands to stifle her outrageous laughter.

You stop yourself from laughing along with her, she has a contagious laugh, sometimes you can't help it, you turn and walk away and leave her amused at the window, you take the cloth off your shoulder and scrub the counter and the till. You've been working in the flower store as a general service assistant for eight months, you weren't looking for a job, but Gloria, the manager and owner of the store, needed a handyman to help her, you were passing by and stopped to look at the flowers, she asked if you were new in town and if you didn't have a job yet, you even thought about tricking her and saying you didn't need a job, but you were honest and when you answered her, she grabbed your arm and dragged you inside, since then you've been working for her.

You're not used to spending a lot of time in one place, there's a huge target on your back, so you're always leaving without looking back, but after getting to know Gloria and the city better, you couldn't leave. You went behind the counter and leaned your arms on it and laid your face in the palm of your hand, you pulled up the sleeve of your blouse and looked at your wristwatch to check the time, in a few minutes Gloria's children would arrive from school and you would be alone in the store.

Tonight you're going to accompany Gloria to an art exhibition, she's shouting from across the store so that you don't forget the promise you made her, if you accompany her, she'll buy you that expensive perfume from her sister's perfumery, you couldn't let that opportunity slip away. You hummed, you haven't been on dates since you were young, before your life turned into the hell it is, you used to go on dates with your old boyfriend, in the past you arranged a date with him and then it all happened, you couldn't make it because of the circumstances and he was furious. Thinking about it makes you uncomfortable.

You shake your head to clear away the painful memories, you haven't seen or heard from your boyfriend for ten years, you don't even consider him your boyfriend anymore, after all, years have passed, he could be engaged to someone else by now. You tap your nails on the counter when you imagine him with someone else. Your bad mood disappears when Gloria comes in to excuse you from work. She announces to you that she'll be leaving early so that you can both get ready to go to the exhibition.

"So... see you later."

Your expression changes from water to wine, your face becomes brighter, the strange thoughts that were running through your head disappear completely. You give Gloria a tight hug and say goodbye, you've arranged to meet her in front of the store at 20:00hrs, you check the time on your wristwatch, it's 17:30, you have enough time to get ready. You go skipping down the street, but the tension in the air makes you stop abruptly, you feel like you're being watched, but when you analyze your surroundings, there's no threat around.

You're always on the alert, not least because your clan has been hunting you like an animal for years. However, paranoia has already made you make mistakes, and you don't want to make mistakes tonight, you have a date! You shake your body and slap your cheeks to dispel this feeling, you tell yourself that nothing bad is going to happen tonight. For a moment you look up at the dazzling late afternoon sky, there are no clouds covering the stars and the setting sun because it's summer in Brazil, but there are a few puddles of water in the street because it rained in the morning, the weather is really crazy here, you can experience all the seasons in a single day.

You greet some familiar faces along the way, the children in the street come to greet you and you offer them warm hugs, you tell them to wait for you, whenever you can you bring bread and sweets for the children, because there is no adult to look after them. Your house is in the middle of a dirt road, not far from the city, but far enough away that if anything happens you'll be able to hide your tracks, the house is old and small, but it's much better than some places you've lived.

You walk for about fifteen minutes until you reach the house, the feeling of being watched comes again, you pass through the gate of the house and look back and to the sides, there's nothing there, but when you reach the door of the house you freeze when you don't hear the characteristic click of the lock. The door is open. You frown and swallow, whoever is behind this door is skilled enough to escape your enhanced senses. You're not human, so whoever is watching you is skilled enough to bypass your vampire sense of smell.

You open the door slowly, there are lots of weapons scattered around the house at strategic points, you just need to pick one of them up. You close the door behind you and look for clues in the hallway, there are no signs of a break-in, no footprints or even traces of someone having been there, but you're not convinced yet. You take off your shoes and grab a dagger hidden inside the umbrella holder, walking on tiptoe and sneaking around the walls, you look from side to side and change position several times.

You search the whole house twice as a precaution, there's nothing, and you're beginning to think that your paranoia is getting the better of you. Yet something tells you not to drop the dagger. You never go against your sixth sense, because most of the time you're right, you close your eyes and stand facing the bedside table in the living room, you take a deep breath and wait, if there was someone there, surely that person would appear. But to your surprise no one has appeared. You feel frustrated and relieved at the same time, you go up the stairs and into the bathroom with the dagger still in your hand, you start getting ready for the meeting, you promised yourself you wouldn't be late and you're going to keep that promise.

You've chosen the best outfit you have, it's nothing fancy, but it's the most beautiful dress in your small closet, it's long with short cream-colored sleeves, there are some birds embroidered in blue on the chest, you've put a checkered belt around your waist as an extra accessory, because the only jewel you have is the reliquary you carry around your neck. You don't normally wear heels because it's difficult to run in them, but today you made an exception. You look at your watch and it's almost time to leave.

You go downstairs excitedly, singing and twirling around, you go to the kitchen and fill a basket with bread and some sweets you've ordered, in your haste you forget your dagger on the counter. Suddenly, a strange presence hovers around the house, you stop abruptly in the middle of the corridor and wait for the other person to attack first, you spin on your heels ready to punch the intruder, but you are blocked by an invisible wall and the basket of bread falls with the impact. Your eyes glaze over in a mixture of surprise and confusion, you know that not many people know your weaknesses, but there was a certain someone who was highly capable of doing it: Satoru Gojo was the name of that person.

"Hello, Y/N." He greets you with a cynical smile. "Long time no see."

"YOU!" You vociferate with your jaw locked.

You're very close to each other. However, before he can speak, you take a glass of acid from your pocket and throw it at the barrier, it's useless, but it gives you enough time and space to get away from him and think clearly, you take a wooden dagger from behind a painting on the wall, a gun would come in handy now, but you were too far from the sofa to pick it up. You can't defeat the great Satoru Gojo, you don't have the power to do it, even if you are good at the art of killing, the Six Eyes are the real stone in your shoe. No matter how skilled you are, you can't escape those eyes.

"How the hell did you find me here?"

"Glad to see you too." He keeps his attitude unassuming and calm, but he's not happy that you've become so strong and skilled, the last time he saw you, you wouldn't have even noticed his presence. "Aren't you going to say hello?"

"Why are you here?" You remain impassive.

"You really don't know?" He raises an eyebrow, as if you've asked a rhetorical question. "You gave the elders of the four clans, including mine, a lot of headaches, so the old men finally gave me permission to come after you."

You wrinkle your nose, this man has come all this way to kill you, you just don't know when or how, you turn your gaze to his face, he's so serious wearing that pair of blue glasses with square lenses, it's ridiculous, but you can't judge him, since you hid the pair of custom-made sunglasses he used to wear, back then you harbored deep feelings for him and decided to keep that pair of glasses with you as a souvenir. It's funny that people who are very close can go from people who know each other to people who don't know each other anymore. A lump forms in your throat and it's hard to breathe, despair takes hold of you, like a spark falling on a pile of straw. You don't want to go back, you like it here, your new life, without curses or evil sorcerers, but you also don't want to be hated by the people you love.

"It's no use trying to run away." He warns you, and it's amazing how his every word sounds like a veiled threat, he takes a step forward and you step back. "But I'm not going to kill you."

"Not now..." You mumble, laughing scornfully, you don't believe him, it's in your face, you step back and take a good look at him, he's wearing expensive clothes, but too simple for his taste, he's also aged in recent years, he turns his face away when he feels the weight of your gaze, strangely uncomfortable. "If you're not going to kill me, what have you come here for?"

"To take you, of course." He sounds as if he's stating the obvious.

"Of course." You shake your head in agreement, you're still laughing. "Of course..." You lean on the wall of the house and laugh until your stomach hurts.

"Is this some kind of joke to you?"

"Of course!" You repeated again with false enthusiasm. "I'm not going back with you, not over my dead body. But you wouldn't kill me even if I hurt you, right? The merciful Satoru Gojo, the man who doesn't get his hands dirty, not even when faced with a murderer." You sneer at him, and he doesn't like it one bit, the last few years have turned you into a cynical and suspicious person, maybe he was telling the truth, but he didn't say anything about hurting you. You hold the dagger steady and point it at his face. "Only one of us is getting out of here today."

You'd kill him without hesitation if you could, he knows it, but you're not interested in a fight, if you knew how much his power has grown while you've been away, you wouldn't be pointing that knife at him. You're also aware that it's a losing battle, you can't win even if there are ten of you, so you decide to use the only card up your sleeve, your own life, you point the dagger at your neck, it's a risky move, but if he still has feelings for you, he'll let you go.

"You wouldn't do that, you're bluffing." He doesn't seem very confident that you're going to kill yourself, after all you value your life so much that you've been running away for years, so you've pierced your neck superficially, but enough to make it bleed. "You crazy suicidal bitch, don't you dare!"

His reaction gives you a little confidence.

"LET ME GO!" You shout.

"I CAN'T, OKAY? PLEASE STOP THIS SHIT." He runs his hand over his face and then through his hair, making it messier than usual, he tries to get closer, but you push the blade even deeper into his neck, he grunts and bites his lower lip. "Stop it, please, I just want to talk." He stutters, his voice laced with tears.

The last time you met, he was so angry that you couldn't recognize him, yet now he looks much more like the boyfriend who loved you deeply than a hunter. You shake your head in agreement and take the dagger out of your neck, blood spurts everywhere and ruins your dress, but it's not serious, you're not stupid, you would never hit a vital point, you just wanted to scare him a bit so you could get away. Satoru suddenly approached you and put pressure on your neck to stop the bleeding, you barely feel any pain, you're used to getting hurt. You're not a sorcerer to use RCT, but you were able to heal yourself, you'd like to remind him of that, but this is the first time you're interacting with him after so long, and he was being so careful that you didn't want to stop him. You watched him throughout, his eyebrows furrowed and his mouth slightly curved into a pout, he was so sexy.

You frown, strange (and obscene) thoughts come to mind, without realizing that he's watching you make these faces and mouths, the next thing you know, he's got his face very close to yours, so close that you can feel his uneven breathing touch the skin of your cheek, he looks at your lips and then into your eyes, you get goose bumps, feelings that you've repressed all these years burst through the door of your heart like an avalanche, you stagger backwards with your face turned to the floor.

Your mind is in chaos, you're distracted for a second or two, but long enough for Satoru to seal his soft lips to yours, the sweet, calm feeling of a chill in your belly, your first kiss after ten years apart. His fingers tangle in your hair and close in an inviting grip that has served to bring the two of you even closer together. He forces you to give in and make room for the real kiss to begin, he explores every corner of your mouth and rubs his tongue against yours in an obscene way, he leads the kiss in a way that you can barely follow. Before breaking the kiss completely, he runs his tongue over your lips as if to show you that he's close enough to invade your mouth again.

You choke on your breath and feel feverish, you were willing to risk your own life to get away from him a few minutes ago, but now you're here in his arms, at the mercy of his desires.

"Stop." Your throat is burning. "Please stop."

He doesn't comply with your request and advances again, so you block his lips with your free hand, he smiles and licks the back of your hand, your face turns red up to your ears, it's humiliating how he's able to mess with you and how your body simply doesn't obey you when it comes to him. However, it's so cute for him to see you so shy (resistant), it reminds him of the first time he fucked you, you were so innocent and vulnerable. Satoru wonders if he could repeat the same feat if he pushed you a little harder.

"I TOLD YOU TO STOP." You push his face away from yours, leaving him at a safe distance, you lower your head and face your feet, luckily your hair is long enough to cover your reddened face. "Say what you want and let's get it over with."

Satoru finally accepts that you're not going to give in anymore, so he takes the dagger from you and throws it a considerable distance away, he's afraid you'll hurt yourself again, you stand in an awkward silence for a while, until your heartbeat normalizes and you come to your senses. With great difficulty you look at him again, but instead of that seductive look, he's slumped and playing with his fingers, a clear sign of anxiety.

"You didn't come to kill me." You feel the air get heavy and his face turns grim after you come to this conclusion, you've never seen him like this before, only when Toji killed Amanai, you frown and hold his blouse with both hands. "Something's happened, hasn't it?" You click your tongue on the roof of your mouth. "What's wrong? Why are you here?" He laughs nervously, you've always been very clever. "Don't be quiet, you were very talkative just now."

His body is shaking, but it's not the cold that bothers him, whatever he's hiding from you affects him to the extent that it makes him shut up, and Satoru Gojo never shuts up, not even when his life was in danger did he stop laughing and babbling about how strong he is. But now he seems like a different person, completely different from the idiot you've lived with for years, and an idiot like him doesn't change so easily, he just becomes more arrogant over time. He turns his face to the floor and bites his lower lip, hesitant to tell you the truth, his heart races in anguish and you shake him, ripping his glasses off his face, at which point you see dark circles under his eyes and watery eyes. You become anxious, but before you could shout at him, he opened his mouth to answer you and you didn't know how to react, because it wasn't the answer you were expecting.

"I didn't come here because of the elders or whatever nonsense is going through your head right now, I came here because... I'm so sorry, Y/N, your sister... she disappeared."

Life really is a butterfly.

[wen-kexing-apologist]

LITBC Ep. 7-8: Gotta Love an Adaptation

Chiming in from @lurkingshan's book club post

On Episodes 7 and 8

So, I love adaptations. While I don’t always engage with every element of an adaptation (I have read zero of the BL books for the shows I’ve watched, for example) I am always interested to learn about how stories are transferred between mediums and people. 

Love in the Big City has been so fun to watch because I have really enjoyed seeing the ways in which the author of the book himself has decided to adjust his own story as the screenwriter for the show. The original creator being in charge of the story in another medium is rarer than it should be, and I am always more comforted by the changes made to plotlines when I know that the creator was responsible. 

Episodes 7 and 8 for example still followed a lot of Part Four, however it was had some of the strongest moments of divergence from original canon of any section of the series. A number of us have mentioned the T-ara’s as an example of this. I think the loneliness that we feel throughout the entirety of the book is countered in the show by the visual presence of the T-ara’s in all the important parts of Go Yeong’s life. And it is such an interesting thing because we don’t learn about them until Part Three of the book, but in learning of their existence we realize that Young has had people around him for all the shit he’s talked about in Parts One and Two. 

gif by @khunkinn

One of the biggest changes being the ending. In the book we end with Young wandering the streets alone, thinking about all the writing about love that he’s done. We end with the flashback to him and Gyu-Ho’s lantern burning. We end with the words: 

“In the end, I left just two syllables on the lantern.  Gyu Ho. My only wish.” 

In the show we still get the burning lantern, we get Gyu Ho, and we get a one-two punch of having the lantern physically say Gyu Ho (규호) on it in Korean, and the voiceover say “love” because fucking ouch. But we also get Go Yeong watching the fireworks with the T-ara’s, a scene that is very much not in the book. I know in talking with some people that they read that moment as taking away from the healing that Young has been doing, which is an entirely valid read, especially because we know how often Go Yeong fakes a smile to hide his pain. 

But for me, it didn’t feel like having the T-ara’s there with him was getting in the way of his healing. With the addition of the T-ara’s as a link between the story beats I really appreciated that Go Yeong ended the show with all of his single friends, watching this explosion of fireworks. I really loved that we end with some level of understanding that Go Yeong will have people in his life to support him whatever comes his way, who will drag him out of bed when he’s depressed, who will carry his mother’s coffin at her funeral, who will be there to watch his healing and to call out his poor taste in men. 

I loved the addition of Eun Su and the wedding and the way that Eun Su looked straight at Go Yeong when he was deciding whether to say yes or no to the proposal. I loved that we got this quiet moment of tragic helium consumption between Go Yeong and Eun Su in a moment of sobering calm, that we had a moment to let Eun Su cry realizing that he didn’t want to get married and that Go Yeong was there in all of that as a support. I know that Go Yeong doesn’t trust the T-ara’s enough to tell them about Kylie, but I have hope that one day he will. Just as he has been reflecting upon the fact that he loved Gyu Ho and regrets letting him get away. 

On the Adaptation as a Whole

Okay, on to the adaptation as a whole. I want to talk about the decision to use different directors every two episodes and why I think that was a brilliant choice. 

First of all, we know each section of the book is its own period of time, and centered around different relationships in Young’s life. The structure of the parts in the book is really interesting because the readers can realize how important Gyu Ho is in Young’s life in the fact that he interrupts the narrative with Habibi. While I think this show would have been elite if it had released two episodes a week for four weeks, I understand the urge to publish it all at once considering the push back it received in Korea. 

Regardless of that though, having different directors makes each of the four sections feel distinct. It is always really fun to watch shows that have different people behind the camera because you will always get something different. Each director has a different lens, a different style, a different performance they will draw out of the actors. And that is incredibly important in a story such as this one where the main character is changing over time. You can write and perform character growth, but I think each part comes with a change in physicality that- while not impossible -would be really difficult to draw out of a performer who is being directed by the same person throughout. 

In addition, because each part does focus on a different important relationship in Go Yeong’s life, having different people be in charge of directing those relationships creates fresher, more distinct chemistry between each pairing. The kind of relationship that Mi Ae has with Go Yeong is large and bright and loud. It’s full of light, and joy, and a deep connection built on authentic selves only the two of them understand. But look at how Go Yeong interacts with Mi Ae in Episodes 5-6. His relationship to her has changed and while the same director could have helped the actors navigate the changing relationship between them, I think to have a different person with a different visual style direct that scene adds an additional, juicy layer of complexity and separation that you wouldn’t necessarily get otherwise. 

As I and many others have surely noted before, different mediums have different benefits when it comes to conveying information. Books can provide intense description or skip over entire settings depending on their relevance, television must show you everything, the clothing the actors well tell you a lot about their characters, the food they eat, the things they drink, the places they live, all the little pieces of set dressing you might not get, that you don’t get from the book are all in there. Love in the Big City the novel gives you much deeper insight into Young’s psyche than you are going to get in the show. The book feels bleaker, more isolated, and more depressed at all stages of the story than what we get out of the show, for the simple fact that the entire story in the book is narrated. When we are first introduced to Go Yeong in the show we get the exterior version of him, the fakest version of him in so many ways. A version of Young we never get because of the structure of the book. 

But there is something I have been thinking about in terms of the visual progression of the stories with the directors that we get. The show itself gets darker and more introspective over time. In Episodes One and Two we are lured in to the story via quick, snappy, and chaotic vibes. The room we open with is full of light, Go Yeong is begging for sex, and then he’s running out the door because his sex partner’s boyfriend has returned on military leave. The club is bright, his time with Mi Ae is bright, the abortion clinic is bright, Mi Ae’s wedding is bright. Everything is bi and loud and distracting, because this is the point in Young’s life where he is the most detached from his own feelings. The biggest moments of visual darkness in Part One are all surrounding Kim Nam Gyu, they’re dates mostly happen in the dark. Their conversations in the car are in darkness, the date to the lock gate is in darkness, the karaoke place is dark, the exchange of apology marinated crab is in the dark. 

But Mi Ae is the more important and prominent relationship in Yeong’s life in the first two episodes and so darkness is drowned out and more disguised in the first two episodes as a result. 

gif by @themisconceptions

Part Two the darkness starts to take over more. Most of the dates with Hyung also take place in the dark, his apartment is scarcely lit, the light of day is on screen primarily through the windows of Hyung’s apartment, through the fake lighting of the hospital rooms. In times when Hyung and Yeong are out in daylight the sky is overcast and gray, better lit than his apartment to be sure, but still there is something dulled out about the sky when they are together. The brightest moments we really get to my recollection (which to be fair I refuse to go back and comb through the episodes to back up my claim) are Yeong waking up in the hospital after his suicide attempt, and Yeong sitting in the park with his mother’s head in his lap. 

Part Three has something really interesting in it to me in terms of how it plays with light. Go Yeong’s relationship to Gyu Ho starts primarily in the dark, meeting at the club, meeting in the coffee shop after the play, meeting on the steps after the last train. But we start to see more light in these episodes after Go Yeong tells Gyu Ho about Kylie. When he starts that conversation he begins it in the dark, and by the time that Gyu Ho has caught up to him to cry over the fact that Go Yeong is smiling through the pain the light has started to rise. Just thinking visually about this part I feel like we get a good mixture of light and dark, it feels balanced in a way the other parts haven’t, and I think that speaks to the fact that Gyu Ho is the person that Go Yeong actually loved. 

I am talking about the lighting here mostly because Part Four feels so distinctly dark. The curtains are drawn, there is very little light coming in. I think @solitaryandwandering is on to something when they are talking about the lighting feeling more ambient. All the light throughout feels muted somehow, like the camera isn’t picking up as much of it even when it’s there. Light does not exist around Habibi almost at all, his apartment is pretty dark, the stairwell where they do their chase scene feels washed out rather than bright, the hotel where Gyu Ho and Go Yeong have sex, the hotel room he has with Habibi where the curtains close all the way, versus the light that comes streaming through the gap in the curtains in his first hotel room with Gyu Ho. Once again the brightest sections of this part surround Gyu Ho, but even then compared to Part Three the way this director utilizes light feels more muted and reserved, just as Go Yeong spends a lot of his time in this part grappling with deep depression. 

I love that even though we have four different directors I feel like we have a clear visual metaphor through the linear progression of lighting in this. We start out bright with the fakest version o fGo Yeong and we end dark with the realest version of Go Yeong we’ve had a chance to see. He’s still got a way to go, but I like how the directors are able to pull different performances and aesthetics out of the story while still making it feel like one cohesive unit. 

Also, I really wish I could pick Park Sang Young’s brain to learn if and how the last few years since he published this book have influenced his engagement with the source material and if and how that may have influenced any changes he made to the story we watched in the show. 

Also also, hugeee shout out to Nam Yoon Su, that dude fucking crushed his performance as Go Yeong, and I another reason I am glad that there were multiple directors on this is because I want that boy to stay as booked and busy and I think that gets a little easier when he has now shown his acting prowess off to four separate directors.

[asirensrage]

Title: There's Something Wrong with Shinichiro Fandom: Tokyo Revengers Rating: Explicit Pairing: None. Side pairing Shinichiro x Unnamed Sano!OC Word count: 2306 Warnings: Dark!fic. Incest. Underaged teen pregnancy. Obsession. Forced Relationship. Emotional Manipulation. Swearing. Violence. Suicide. Canon divergence. Unbeta’d. *warnings are not exhaustive* Summary: There's something wrong with Shinichiro. Haruchiyo tries to get to the bottom of it. What he finds destroys everything he believes of the man. Shin is supposed to be the good one. Not this.

MAJOR MANGA SPOILER WARNING!

This fic mentions events in the manga that have not yet been shown in the anime. You have been warned.

Notes: I enjoyed writing this and the exploration in Sanzu's POV. It's a look at how desperation and fear can change a person and how distance can give the perspective needed to see the truth. I hope you like it.

There’s something wrong with Shinichiro. 

It started after Mikey’s death. Maybe even before it but Haruchiyo wasn’t around for a lot of that. Juvie does a number is keeping one out of the loop. He doesn’t regret it though. Not after what he heard those assholes say. But Shinichiro…maybe it’s because he was gone that he can see the difference. It’s not a gradual thing. 

Mikey died. A broken fucking fragile thing his friend never had any right to be. Emma left long before Haru got out. And people…he thinks people are forgetting there was another one. Another sister who was friends with his. He heard Takeomi say she ran away but Haruchiyo knows her as well as he knew Mikey. She wouldn’t do that. She was a fucking bleeding heart who tried hard to step up to take care of her family long before she had any right to. Shinichiro was supposed to be the eldest. He looked out for them. But then Mikey died and Shinichiro was going fucking insane which was saying something with how he knew people thought about him.

Haruchiyo tried to ask Baji. He tried to even ask his fucking brother who waved him off like it was nothing. When Takeomi ordered him to leave Shin alone and not go visit, he knew something was up. He knows something’s wrong and fuck Takeomi if he thinks he’ll listen to him. Haruchiyo isn’t a child anymore. He’s not afraid of his brother. Shinichiro was more of a brother to him than Takeomi ever was. If he can help him, he will. 

So he goes to visit him. 

But Shinichiro keeps him standing on the porch instead of inviting him in. It’s weird. Shinichiro was always welcoming to him. To any of Mikey’s friends. To anyone. It was part of why he was so popular, why he was a good leader. So the way he’s standing on the porch smoking, body angled in a way to keep Haruchiyo from even looking in the doorway sets his nerves on edge. 

He doesn’t get let in. Shinichiro makes some excuse to go to work or the shop (he changed his story twice) and leads Haruchiyo away from the house before he ever realizes what he’s doing. It makes him suspicious and afraid. He attended Mikey’s funeral but he wonders if they never cremated Mikey’s body. If Shinichiro has some kind of shrine set up…but he wouldn’t do that. Shin wouldn’t let Mikey be unable to pass on. So there’s something else. 

🪟

The next time he visits the house, he does when he knows Shinichiro is at work. He knocks on the door, but there’s no answer. He hears it though. Hears the soft sound of feet padding on the ground. Living in the type of home he did, surviving juvie without getting jumped, you pick up things. Including an acute sense of hearing to start. 

He moves as quiet as possible around the outside, trying to find the right window. Mikey used to joke about sneaking out as teens when they were kids. Before…before the accident. It’s never locked. Not that anyone would attempt to rob a dojo. 

He prys it open slowly, just enough that he can see first and freezes. She didn’t run like Emma. Instinct urges him to continue, to break in and demand what happened. He’ll fuck them up but there’s something warning him and he remembers sitting in Mikey’s funeral, watching Shinichiro grip his last sibling’s wrist tight, as if he was afraid she’d disappear too. It was chalked up to grief. 

He swallows tightly, shaking his head as he tries to make sense of it. He’s wrong. He has to be wrong. But Takeomi ordered him to leave it alone, no one asks about her anymore and the former Black Dragons have made every excuse about Shinichiro’s losses. They helped spread the rumours that both girls are gone. 

He closes the window as quietly as possible. And runs. 

🪟

“What the fuck are we doing?” Baji complains as Haruchiyo drags him along. 

“Will you shut the fuck up?” Honestly, it’s a miracle Baji even let him because the two of them haven’t been friends in ages. He thinks it’s the curiosity of Haru demanding his presence. That he has something to show him. Baji is the only one who Haruchiyo knows will react the way he should. The way he reacted. Haruchiyo needs him to prove that he’s not insane. That his suspicions are right.  

“Is this some fucking obsession thing? Does Shin know we’re here?”

“No,” he admits. “I was trying to see what was wrong with him and–” he can’t even bring himself to say it. Can’t air the thought that one of his heroes…

“He’s fucking grieving,” Baji says like everyone does. Haruchiyo shakes his head though and his former friend falls quiet. Thankfully just in time as they reach the house and sneak around to the same window. 

Haruchiyo prys it open the same way and looks, praying that she’s in the same spot today. He sighs as he sees her. Folding laundry now and looking too domesticated. It’s not right. He nods towards the window and moves out of the way for Baji to see. The other boy gives him an exasperated look but steps into the space and peers in. 

“What the fuck!?”

In the desperation for the truth, to know he’s not seeing things, he’s forgotten that Baji has never been quiet once in his life. 

Baji shoves the window open completely and pulls himself up into it. Haru follows quickly. He got him into this after all…and he needs to know the truth. 

She looks stunned to see them and a little scared which is ridiculous because they were friends. They are friends. “Yo–you can’t be here!” She says, looking around like she’s expecting something to jump out at them. 

“Who the fuck knocked you up?” Baji demands, storming towards her. “Does Shin know? Fuck, course he does. Who was it? Are they still fucking alive or did the dragons kill them?”

Haruchiyo can only stare at her, watching as she looks around, clutching the shirt she’s holding. Her stomach protrudes enough to make it obvious. She’s probably going to be due soon. She’s too fucking tiny to look like this.

“You need to go,” she tells them after taking a deep breath. “Shin-nii doesn’t like visitors. Not anymore.” Something about the endearment, the honorific attached to his name sits like lead in Haruchiyo’s stomach. It’s nothing he hasn’t heard her say a thousand times before, but it somehow feels worse now. 

“We’re not going anywhere until we get some fucking answers,” Baji stands his ground. “Why is everyone saying you ran away? We haven’t seen you in years! Who the fuck knocked you up? You’re fifteen!” 

“Is it Shin?” Haruchiyo asks, finally cutting in. Baji looks at him like he’s insane and ready to take all his anger out on him for the sheer disrespect. 

But then she looks away. She doesn’t protest the idea, doesn’t accuse him of telling lies and her silence is all the confirmation he needs. Baji seems to realize it too because he whirls back on her, staring at her in horror. 

Haruchiyo feels like his world is collapsing around him. 

Shinichiro is supposed to be the good one. The type of brother anyone could rely on. He was the type of person who laughed and nodded when his siblings’ friends called him ‘nii-chan’ and treated all of them like they were his little siblings too. He wasn’t supposed to be like this. Not Shin. 

“What the fuck?” Baji asks again, quieter this time, like he’s having as much trouble believing it as Haruchiyo is. 

“How–” his throat is tight. It feels like something is lodged in it. This is worse than seeing Mikey decrepit and fragile. “How long?” he chokes out. 

“It’s not what you think,” she says quickly. “He…he needs me…”

“You’re fifteen!” Baji snaps. “He’s your fucking brother!” 

She flinches at that. “I...I know. I didn’t…he needs me. We’re the only ones left!” she looks up at them pleadingly, as if trying to get them to understand. 

For the first time in a long time, Baji and Haruchiyo look at each other and agree with each other without a word. “Bullshit.” They say at the exact same time. 

“He does!” she insists. “Everyone’s gone! You don’t get it! We only have each other…we…he needs me. He promised he’d never leave!”

“Not like this,” Baji says. “This isn’t fucking right. Brothers don’t do this shit.”

“How would you know?” She snaps at him. “You don’t have any family.”

Baji scowls at her. “You’re my fucking family! You, Mikey, Emma! All of you!” He motions towards her. “No wonder Emma fucking ran if this was what would have happened if she stayed!” She flinches as he says it. 

Haruchiyo steps closer. “You know this isn’t right,” he says quietly. He thinks of his own younger sister and the hell he’d reach if someone did this to her. He makes a mental note to get her as far away from Takeomi as possible. His brother knows. Even if he’s not doing it himself, the way he warned Haru away makes it obvious that he knows what Shin’s done. “Have you even seen a doctor?”

She swallows tightly, tears building in her eyes as she nods. 

“Come on,” Baji says. “We’re taking you to my place. My mom will know what to do.”

“I can’t,” her voice cracks. 

Haruchiyo leans down, cupping her cheeks with his hands as he meets her eyes. “You can. Trust us.” 

🪟

It takes ten more minutes until she agrees. They take her to Baji’s mom like he said, sneaking around and making sure that none of the Black Dragons see them. They get her out of the city, to Baji’s mom’s relatives, as fast as they can. Baji makes a show of complaining in public about his mom trying to reform him by way of the countryside. Haruchiyo stays far from him, making it look like they’ve continued to be on the outs, to not be friends anymore. Haruchiyo can trust that Baji will protect her.

He takes responsibility for redirecting the Black Dragons, current and former, as well as Shin. Shin who devolves quickly, reacting first with anger only to sink further into his darkness. The man known to be charming enough to bring together opposing gangs can barely bring himself to leave his house, praying for the return of his sister and their unborn child. His friends, the men who followed him, tear the city apart. 

Izana, leader of the Black Dragons, has his men drag Haruchiyo off of the street, demanding answers.

“You know, Shinichiro asked me to make sure you made it through juvie alive,” he tells him. “You asked about him. Why?”

“He picked me up when I got released.” Haruchiyo says, spitting blood out from the last hit. He glares up at the silver-haired man. “He seemed off. I wanted to make sure he was okay.”

“Why?”

“Because I owe him a lot.”

Izana scoffs at him, looking at him like he’s unworthy. “Where the fuck is my sister?”

Haruchiyo looks at him. “She’s not your sister.” He gets a kick to the face for that. 

“She’s Shin’s, that makes her mine.”

Haru wonders what it is about her that’s making these men like this. If it’s Shin’s provocation, if it’s contagious or if it’s just the way she’s always been kind and trying hard to keep her family together that draws people into her. 

He keeps his mouth shut. 

🪟

He hears through Takeomi, through Wakasa, that Shin’s obsession has grown. Not only is Tokyo being torn apart, but Shin has apparently gotten it into his head that the problem is Mikey’s death. That if he can find a way to go back, he can fix everything. He can have his brother back. He can get his sister back and their child. His child. 

It reinforces Haruchiyo’s belief that he’s doing the right thing keeping her out of the city. 

🪟

“Please, Haruchiyo.” 

Shin looks worse for the wear. His shirt is stained, hair unwashed and Haruchiyo thinks he hasn’t bathed in a few days. It’s almost sad seeing a man who was leader of one of the most powerful motorcycle gangs reduced to this. His grief is eating at him but instead of doing something about it, he’s spiralling. 

The only reason he’s talking to him is because Takeomi called, demanding to know what the fuck Haruchiyo did. He’s the prime suspect but even with the fading bruises and threats from Izana, Haruchiyo gave nothing away. Shin apparently clung to that and tracked him down, finding him to beg the boy for answers. Haruchiyo thinks it’s pathetic, even if he’ll never say that out loud. What happened to the man he idolized? 

“Where is she? Where’s my child?”

“I don’t know,” Haruchiyo answers. It’s not technically a lie. He doesn’t know exactly where she is. It’s better that way. 

Shinichiro sighs and looks up to the sky. “This is all my fault.” For a moment, Haruchiyo’s hope rises at the admission. If Shinichiro realizes he fucked up, that there’s something wrong with him, he can get better. He can– “I should have chained her to the bed or some shit.”

His heart sinks. “What?”

Shinichiro shakes his head. “I lost them all. She…she was all I had. If Mikey hadn’t…I thought I found the answer. I really did.” 

Haruchiyo watches in horror as Shinichiro gets closer to the edge of the bridge they met on. “Hey, wait! Stop!”

“We were happy,” he sees tears in the older man’s eyes. “I love her. I always have. No after how fucked up it was. Take care of them for me, alright? Tell my kid..tell them I’m sorry.” 

Haruchiyo stares at him in shock, seconds too late to lunge forward and stop him from falling over the edge. He didn’t want this. Never this. “SHINICHIRO!” 

🪟

Haruchiyo never thought he was insane, despite what people said about him. He always knew exactly what he was doing. But the moment he went from being glared at by a majority of people at Shinichiro’s funeral to being at home with a different series of memories in his head, he thought he finally cracked. 

But there are scars on his face that he never had before. 

Haruchiyo races, trying to find the truth. He heads for the Sano home as fast as he can and nearly crashes into Shinichiro headfirst. If Haruchiyo is confused then Shinichiro is just as surprised to know that Haruchiyo remembers everything. No one else does. 

He thinks that’s the end of it. Shinichiro is alive. Mikey is alive. Emma hasn’t run away and the last Sano isn’t pregnant with her own brother’s baby. There is a relief that settles in his chest at the fact that everything is fixed. Shinichiro fixed it.

But then he sees the way Shin looks at his sister when he thinks anyone isn’t paying attention and Haruchiyo is forced to face the reality that this Shinichiro still loves her in every fucked up way imaginable. When he stares too long at her stomach, Haruchiyo wonders if he’s imagining the baby that he put there. That he left behind.

He can see the obsession in the man’s eyes, the guilt and the way he holds her too long when she hugs him. Haruchiyo stays around the Sanos more now and he would bet all the money he doesn’t have that Shinichiro has to force himself not to send him away. That would gain questions because Haruchiyo has always been welcome. Everyone has.

Then, out of nowhere, Shinichiro is killed. 

An accident that Haruchiyo doesn’t really believe because who doesn’t know that SS Motors is Shin’s? Wouldn’t Mikey have taken his friends there? Guilt eats at him for the relief he feels. Haruchiyo doesn’t have to protect her from her own brother now that he’s dead. 

He promised to keep her safe. Even if he didn’t get the chance to respond, the nightmares he has of Shinichiro falling off that bridge, of Mikey’s expression as he ripped apart his mouth and told him to laugh. It keeps him awake sometimes. Mikey never used to be like that. He knows that. Something changed. It’s the same feeling that led him to discover Shin’s secret, so he stays by the Sanos, stays at Mikey’s side, and watches.

Just because Shin is dead doesn’t mean shit. Not when Haruchiyo remembers the way Izana threatened him at Shinichiro’s funeral the first time, promising him that he’d find her and raise Shin’s kid as his own. Nor with the way he sees Mikey starting to spiral after Shin’s death and the way her and Emma are stepping up to take care of him. The way he clings to them, to her, like they’re the only thing keeping him standing. 

He doesn’t trust the Sano men. Not with her. 

He stays. He changes his last name to Sanzu, to get as far as fuck away from his own brother he still sees as complicit even if he never was in this timeline. He keeps in touch with his own younger sister, keeping Senju away from their own brother and using her to keep track of the Sano girls as he remains at Mikey’s side. He couldn’t save her from Shinichiro, but he can try from Mikey. From Izana. 

He made a promise. 

tr tag: @mitsuwuyaa @blackfire2013 @bleach-your-panties @reiners-milkbiddies

I’m not tagging anyone else lol

[worstdisastermaster]

The books and the shows aren't the same thing and?? That's okay?? It doesn't have to be??

Some of the artists haven't even seen the show yet, and maybe won't 🤷‍♀️ I know I've seen like. The 1st episode and that's it lol. And I really enjoyed it and I think it's really fun

But people tend to separate book fandoms from in screen fandoms, to an extent, at least, bc there ARE differences, and THATS OKAY

They are very connected but they are not the same and I don't understand why people find that so hard to accept?? Like. Genuinely I'm so confused lol

Like if someone was being disrespectful, or trying to whitewash Leah or something horrid then like. Defend her!!! (Do try to be polite tho bc people can and often do change, and they know what they have been taught until they learn more- like for example, a few years ago I had no idea ab anything lgtbq and I peob would have gotten myself canceled bc I had. No idea. Ab any of it. And despite having best intentions in heart i totally would have offended someone, and that would have crushed me, because *i didnt know*. I never would have hurt anyone on purpose, i just didnt realize what COULD hurt others on that specific topic, much less why. But now I identify with it and am learning new things ab jt every day and etc. And that's a super touchy topic for a lot of people and for good reason too! Just try to be kind first, then if they are jerks u can be a jerk back lol. Just give peopke a chnace to get better- and then PLEASE dont hold the past against them ubless they very clearly havent changed mk please please please let people grow and change and get better dont crush them before they can) anti Leah trash is. That. Trash

But why would you attack book Annabeth, just for existing? She was my childhood, and I identified a lot with her as I grew up. And guess what! I also identified with Hazel, and I do so even more now! No matter what race she will be casted as, I'm still going to imagine BOOK Hazel the way I always did. Doesn't mean I won't adore her actress, or appreciate art of the girl playing her role! But would you call me racist for drawing her as African American if her actress, was, say, Asian American? Or drawing Leo as Latino instead of Somoan? Because to me, u less I am being a jerk about it, all I'm doing is drawing the book instead of the show. Idk I'm too sleep deprived to put my thoughts into coherent words lol

I love the posts, where it's like, book Annabeth and show Annabeth holding hands. Those posts are my favorite, both because they are freaking adorable, but also. Because it's equal

They are different aspects of the same person

And

Thats

Okay

You know???

I quite literally grew up reading pjo. I read it at least once every year since I learned HOW to read, *partially on pjo*, until late middle school. I was raised on book Annabeth.

Show Annabeth is new and exciting and adorable and I'm so happy for it and I am very excited for all the people being introduced to it!!!!!!!! However, when I'm writing book pjo, I'm not swaping it out for show scenes, bc they are, in fact, different. Which, again, NOT A BAD THING. And you know what? When people from the show fandom write their scenes, they aren't going to be thinking ab the book scenes, and THATS OKAY TOO!!! And I could care less how my readers saw my characters when the read the story. I write them the way I imagine them, but it's their job as the reader to say 'no, actually :P' and swap out the appearance for one they liked better.

I did that plenty often as a kid, and i donf regeret it.

Which, ironically enough, was why my book Percy was blond until ab 6th grads XD I mixed up Luke and Percy's hair description ONCE and just. Never questioned it, though all the rereads, or looking at the covers of the books 💀 you can imagine my shock when I joined the fandom and found out Percy had black hair, instead of sandy hair like, you know, S A N D, like poseidon!!! And now show Percy is blond XD

That just proves people can imagine things how they want and jts okay- especially bc maybe, in an au, they're rifht!!! (Au being show Percy to me)

Anyways I lost my train of thought and it's almost 12 here lolll I hope I didn't say anything ill be embarrassed by come tomorrow~

Good night world :3

Hi guys, wanted to discuss something going on for a while now. What the hell is wrong with pjotwt? Like...whats wrong with this people? Do you see what they say? What they are even trying to do?

First of all, let me start by speaking about the cast. They are all wonderful children, Leah especially! She is doing an amazing job as Annabeth. But book Annabeth still exists yk? She is and she is literally white. It is not racist. But denying about a character being white in the books, even spreading hate like this...is racist. There are people out there related with Annabeth for years. People love her, every version, maybe book more maybe even the movie. How can you disrespect her like this? And most importantly, how can they attack an artist like this, with an art being so beautiful. What they are trying to do is not protecting Leah, it is spreading hate. It is awful. Making this fandom toxic, so so much.

Them trying to erase book Annabeth because she is white, trying to cover her by painting on her, shaming artists, calling people that loves her racist...What do we do about this in pjo fandom? This fandom used to be so beautiful, but now. This people are not part of the fandom in my eyes, because real fans, would respect every version of the characters, love them with their anything, even flaws. They would protect this characters because they love them, so much. And not to mention this characters are the ones Rick wrote 20 years ago, they were with us for so long.

What do tumblr think about this I wonder? Since pjo fandom is pretty active here :3

[leggerefiore]

so I have an angst request that I’m wondering if you could do. I love the fankids but I’m wondering if for some reason the fankids end up in another world. Where they don’t exist. Their respective parents exist but due to some nonsense (Cyrus and his refusal to stop, Grimsley cheating, Nanu pushing reader away) their parents never got together and now they are stuck in such an unfamiliar place without the comfort of their parents. They stay with reader and the pokemen realize that in another world they are happy and have a loving family. So lots of angst from all sides until one day the real parents come to rescue their children and take them away. Leaving the people in this weird world confused and in despair. Hope that makes sense! Idk why I am in such a mood lol

cw: angst, some (not) parental arguing in cyrus's part, cheating in grimsley's, fankids amuck

characters: Grimsley, Cyrus, Nanu

i wrote this for no one to read lmao. changed the request a bit sorryyyy

interesting

♠️Grimsley❤️

♤ Nero held tightly onto Morrigan as they looked around at their surroundings. It was still Alola, same as ever. A place he originally had been upset about moving to, yet now it was a comfort to see. The Ultra Wormhole had been a surprise, both had not been expected such a thing to just pull them in. Nanu had warned them – Telling them stories of fallers without memories ending up in unknown places. They had not had their memories scrambled, at least. Well, he had not. Morrigan had fallen unconscious. It seemed that it likely had just looped them back around. He bravely supported his twin on his shoulder and headed towards the nearest pokemon centre.

♡ Yet, as he headed to the one near the Tapu Village, he passed a familiar man. A man who was just about to walk past them when he felt his annoyance spike. How could he ignore his son and daughter like that!? It was frustrating enough that his father never seemed to learn from his mistakes. His glare seemed to make the gambler come to a stop. “… May I help you?” he asked, “Are you playing the hero to a helpless damsel with the hopes of winning big in the end?” Nero felt like gagging. That was his sister.

◇ “… You're not funny, dad,” Nero grumbled, “Help me with Morrigan. She's been unconscious for a minute, and I'm seriously worried.” He went to move his sister to the older man, but Grimsley took a step back. Icy blue eyes observed him for too closely before switching to Morrigan. He cocked up a brow and brought a hand to his chin. “… Dad,” Nero urged, “Seriously. Help. This is your daughter. Don't you care about her?” This once more caught the gambler off guard. There was much pondering.

♧ “Can you tell your parent I don't appreciate being informed of such a monumental thing in this way?” was Grimsley's reply, “Do they want child support or something? I'm completely broke these days. They played their hot hand too late.” Nero felt frustrated. Was he mocking them? This truly was not the time. He felt Morrigan begin to stir. Her head lifted as she looked around and grasped her head. Then, her gaze landed on Grimsley.

♤ “Dad!” she smiled and moved to hug the gambler, “Nero and I got pulled into one of the Ultra Wormholes!” Grimsley awkwardly dodged her affection. She tilted her head, unsure if this was her dad messing with her. “… Well, I guess it was mostly my fault,” she admitted, “The thrill of whether we would end up in some strange alien world was too much to resist.” His expression was strange at her words. She shrunk back. He almost looked like he was regarding her as one might an insect.

♡ “… I don't know what lies you have been fed,” he let out a breath, “But, I have little interest in being a dad. I doubt you're my only children out there. Just because I had some on and off again relationship with your parent doesn't mean I'm interested in you.” He shook his head. Morrigan took a step back, confused. It was the first time in her like in which her father had ever spoken so harshly to him. Nero stepped forward and stomped a foot at him, already sick of his shit. Whatever game he was playing at, he was taking too far. Being cruel to Morrigan for seemingly no reason and insulting their other parent was too much. Grimsley actually looked a bit intimidated. “… They should have told you this. I made that clear before we broke up.”

◇ Both stood shocked. Broken… up? Neither could recall their parents being unhappy with another despite the circumstance that had happened to them. In fact, if anything, their other parent had been happy Grimsley had more time to lavish on them. Both looked at one another in horror at the thought. This had to be another world. Or Grimsley was really messing with him, but both could tell his expression was too real. “… What?” he questioned, cooking a brow at the twins, “Did they not tell you? Apparently, when I started dating them, I wasn't supposed to keep sleeping around.” Nero had to be physically held back. Though, it did confirm that this was not their world.

♧ Before the situation could intensify any further, a familiar voice called out their names. Both stood astonished when their father seemingly appeared with you in strange not-quite spacesuits. The other Grimsley took a few steps back when his counterpart removed his helmet. “… Oh, man, you two actually nearly gave me a heart attack,” he seemingly ignored his lookalike to approach the two kids, “You certainly did Nanu. The old man was calling all the shots on your missing investigation. Didn't think he was that attached to you both.” He brought a hand to rest on each of their shoulders. Morrigan soon shoved Nero out of the way to cling to Grimsley. Nero watched as the other one observed how you approached them, too, smiling softly. He should have felt at ease.

♤ “… What a situation,” the other Grimsley remarked, placing a hand on his hip. It was clear that he could comprehend this scene. Yes, he understood Ultra Wormholes thanks to Nanu's badgering about avoiding them, but here stood a testament to something far greater than his understanding. Something inside of him twisted at the sight of the happy family. It was something that he never desire, but he could observe the genuine smile on his counterpart's face. “… Did something happen to your head?” he questioned his alternate self.

♡ That Grimsley managed to escape his daughter's hold. Turning to his counterpart, he tilted his head. “… Nope,” his simple reply was with a shrug, “I fell in love. I simply couldn't resist them, and now I've built myself up something. It's better than any high from a thrill.” He pointed the twins to follow you as he headed away. “When you really want something as yours… It drives you into a special kind of madness.” He bid his counterpart farewell and walked over wrap an arm around his partner's waist.

That Grimsley pondered if he could have ended up like his counterpart.

🌌Cyrus🛰

☄️ Cyllene would admit she was perhaps a little too playful. Even if she was a child, there were certain things she knew better than to do yet still did. Engaging with Palkia was chief among them. The legendary had opened a portal, and she, curious crawled in. Which led to her seemingly being atop Mt Coronet. She was lost as to what had happened, but simply assumed that Palkia had created a portal to the top of the mountain. She opted against thinking too much on it, as nothing was immediately odd or uncommon. That was until she found herself riding the train back towards Veilstone. Most people glanced at her strangely. It made her a bit nervous, but she otherwise made her home trip as normal.

☄️ The glances in Veilstone were far more intense as she was spotted by some Galactic grunts. She tilted her head at their reaction. They gazed at her like some unexpected oddity. She ignored them and simply made her way to apartment her family resided in. It was only as she approached the door that she realised she did not have her key. Nervously, she brought her tiny fist to knock against the door. It was quiet for far too long until the speaker beside the door beeped on. “… Are you lost?” It was unmistakably the voice of her father, “There is a police box just a few buildings down. They can help out find your parents.” Cyllene stood stunned. Her eyes went wide, and her heart raced in her chest. Her father was not one for such jokes. Tears burned her eyes.

☄️ “… F-Father…?” her voice was small. The PA system was quiet for but a moment. Then a reply. A simple questioning, “Pardon?” Cyllene moved closer to the speaker, knowing it doubled as a camera. “… Dad…” she begged, “Please…. please don't tease me…” She felt like crying. More silence followed before the door clicked open to reveal the man who was no doubt her father. He was wearing more casual clothing and his hair was unstyled, but it was him. She clung to his legs and felt herself begin to cry. Why was he being mean to her?

☄️ This Cyrus stood stunned, however, at this little girl who stood outside his home. He was no fool. The resemblance was plain as day. This child was a relative of his, if not directly related to him. Some horrible sense of empathy burned in his hardened heart as she wept. Instinct got the better of him as he knelt down and rested a hand on her back. Her reactions… They reminded him of someone. He swallowed. Judging by her age… It was not illogical to assume a possibility that she was… He sighed. “There, there…” his voice was soft, “… Are you claiming that you are my daughter?”

☄️ Cyllene nodded. She could not fathom her own father not recognising her. Had he attempted to mess with the Lake Guardians once again? Her panic led to her gripping his arms tightly. “Father…” she mumbled. His eyes went wide. Another question came from him. A question about her whole parentage. Cyllene blinked at this one. “… My other parent is…” A familiar name left her. Cyrus was frozen by her words. His theory… It was correct. How could this be? The question was about to leave him before he finally motioned her in the apartment.

☄️ Cyllene was further shocked at the state of it. There was no trace of family home she had come to know. Nothing of the small projects she had worked on with her father or the bed for Weavile in the living room. It was dark and seemingly mostly unused. Slowly, it finally set in about what had occurred. She felt sick. All she wanted was her Rotom toy or her bed or for her father to sit her in his lap and explain a star map to her. Instead, she was stuck with an alternate reality version of her father. One who clearly did not recognise her. More tears escaped her eyes. This Cyrus seemed to attempt to comfort her again.

☄️ Forcing down her torment, she was faced with a situation. Yet, before she could be given a chance to explain, her father had out his phone and was making a phone call. His tone was reserved, but Cyllene recognised the voice on the other end of the call. A demand was made for them to meet him at once. Seemingly, they relented after a bit of back and forth. Cyrus informed her she would be back with her other parent soon enough. Yet, they needed to have a chat before he handed her back off. Cyllene felt bewildered. There was no time to object when he grasped her hand tugged her along to a certain building in Veilstone. There stood another, waiting with their arms crossed and clear frustration on their face. Though, this was changed when they saw Cyrus approach with Cyllene.

☄️ “Why did you fail to tell me of our child!?” Cyrus's voice was a rare kind of loud and aggressive. Cyllene was startled away from him due to it. Her other parent stood shocked, too. Their eyes went to Cyllene and back to Cyrus. A simple response of not knowing failed to appease the man. The two soon fell into an argument, making Cyllene curl into herself. Panic burned inside her and made her arms feel numb. All she could do was tap to two stones she found on the ground together. It only seemed to grow worse and worse until finally a voice cut through the fighting.

☄️ “Cyllene.” Her head whipped up as tears fell from her eyes. There, approaching from stairs leading up to the Galactic building was another Cyrus. His gaze was firmly on her. Her legs had never moved so quickly. This version of the Galactic Boss caught her and held her tightly to himself. Another person ran up the stair to them. You. Her eyes burned as you brought a hand gently to comb through her hair. The alternate pair of you both came to an abrupt silence.

☄️ “… What is this?” the Cyrus of this world asked. The Cyrus she knew shook his head. “… Pointless to discuss such things. The idea of parallel worlds existing is something that you are no doubt aware of,” was his reply, “It seems we are two versions of the same person who engaged with different choices. Intriguing.” He clutched Cyllene tighter to himself. The other Cyrus nodded. The other you stood shocked at how close you were to your Cyrus. “… I apologise. We will be correcting this error,” with those words, Cyllene was lifted into the air and carried away by her father to a nearby portal.

Somehow, she felt as if those two had been changed by the experience.

🐈‍⬛️Nanu❤️‍🩹

🌑 Ohi'a would admit what he did was dumb. And, without a doubt, would piss off his dad. The geezer probably would be ready to kill him and then himself if he learnt that he got pulled in an Ultra Wormhole. It really had not been his fault. A toddler almost pulled in, and he dumbly rushed over to push them out of the way. He, instead, was sucked in. Yet… Despite all the horror stories of fallers and Miss Anabel's own existence, he did not fell discombobulated nor without his memories. Looking around, in fact, he still just seemed to be in Alola. The same as ever. He shrugged it off and headed back towards the Po Town police station. He needed to discuss whatever happened with his dad even if it was going to be a pain in the ass. He could already feel the hardened glare of the Kahuna piercing his soul.

🌑 He found himself approaching the station, seeing a familiar man and girl outside the door. Both turned to glance at him strangely. Ohi'a cocked up a brow at them. Acerola approached him with a bright smile and asked if he was lost. He was bewildered. Lost? He lived here. His gaze drifted to his dad, who was trying to pretend that he was not there. “… Huh?” he finally spoke, “… It's me. Ohi'a. I live here.” Acerola's head tilted while Nanu's attention finally shifted onto him.

🌑 “… In Alola?” Nanu finally cut in, carefully treading over, “Where, boy? You aren't trying to join Team Skull, are you?” His hands were in his pockets. Those crimson eyes stared into his own matching ones as if attempting to intimidate him. Ohi'a's nose scrunched up. What? He was acting extremely suspicious towards him. Why? Acerola was even treating him like an anomaly, too. It stung more than he would like to admit. Was this some kind of punishment? It was not like his father at all. Nanu could be a bit of a hard ass, but nothing cruel. Something was wrong here.

🌑 “… No. I mean…” Ohi'a trailed off, pondering what to say. The idea of parallel realities was no unknown to him. That one trainer on their island challenge had told him about their travels in the Ultra Wormhole. An alternate reality, far into the future of a destroyed Hau'Oli city. He stiffened up. Bringing his hand to the back of his neck, he sighed. “… Look, I don't think you'll believe me, but I fell through an Ultra Wormhole,” he explained. Nanu tensed up visibly at his words. “Through some struck of luck, I still have my memories,” he met his gaze, “… No idea what's going on in this world, but in mine, you're my old man.”

🌑 Nanu registered his words in an instant. The suspicion towards him somehow seemed to both fall and increase. Shaking his head, a sigh left him. Acerola gasped at Ohi'a's words and looked between Nanu and him. The Kahuna motioned for him to follow him into the police station. He waved Acerola off, too. Both of them sat in the station for a moment in silence. Ohi'a took in that it seemed much more… different from his memories. A single couch for sleeping. Nothing really to survive on. Some take-out and instant ramen about. “… So, can I ask who your other parent is?” he finally broke the silence. Something told Ohi'a that he already had an idea. His reply of a certain name only got a nod. “Figured…” He sighed, “… Am I a happy family man in your world or something?”

🌑 “… Nope,” Ohi'a replied, watching a Meowth approach him and give his hand a sniff. He brought a hand to pet the pokemon. Its soft fur, a familiar comfort. Nanu observed the interaction. “You're exactly the same, but you're married,” he shrugged, “… I guess you get busy with us, though. Tapu Bulu seems quite happy you had a kid.” Nanu scoffed at that. “I need to get back, you know” he continued, “My parents… They'll end up worried. You seem to think I'm more trouble than I'm worth until something happens to me.”

🌑 Nanu glanced at him. “… Are they happy?” he asked seriously. Ohi'a thought on his family for a moment. It was difficult to tell with how tormented Nanu could be, but he knew his father simply enjoyed the peacefulness of being in a loving relationship. You adored Nanu, often being far too affectionate for either of their tastes, but the small smile on his father's lips. You were happy as can be. Despite everything, he felt his family life was healthy. His parents were in a loving relationship, and they both cared for him.

🌑 “… Pretty much,” he nodded, “… What happened here?” He glanced at the alternate version of his father. Nanu shook his head. Ohi'a felt curious. His father always seemed quite attached to his other parent, typically being quite open to whatever they wanted simply to appease them or make them happy. Granted, it was still in his usual lazy fashion, but it was much like a cat putting up with its owner annoying it out of love. “Are you not together?” Another head shake. Ohi'a felt his heart drop. It was already strange enough being in a world where he did not exist, but his parents not being together felt strangely more difficult.

🌑 Before the conversation could grow any deeper, the door to the station opened, revealing three people in strange suits. Ohi'a recognised them as the attire of the Ultra Recon Squad. Stepping in, one removed their helmet to meet the eyes of the other two. Another Nanu. It felt like something out of a bad movie. “… There you are,” he walked to Ohi'a, “… You're more trouble than you're worth, boy.” The boy rolled his eyes in return. The other person revealed themselves to be you as you rushed over to hug him. He groaned at the tightness. The third actually seemed to be one of the Ultra Recon members.

🌑 The other Nanu relaxed as the recon member explained that they had a way to safely return to their original world. Yet, he felt himself staring at the family for far too long. Everything he had rejected because he felt so unworthy stood right in front of him. His counterpart met his eye. “Thanks for watching over him,” he nodded, “I apologise if he caused any problems.” The Kahuna shook his head. As the four departed from the station, he sat alone for a moment in deep thought.

Maybe he should contact them. It probably was not too late.

[tea-potato-gt]

G/t recommendations:

Midori Days (Midori no hibi) 2005

The plot: Midori is a shy girl who wants to build up the courage to tell Seiji how she feels. Seiji is a delinquent with a heart of gold who just wants a girlfriend. Fate has a funny way of bringing the two together when they wake up to (a shrunken) Midori becoming Seiji's right hand!

G/t: Midori does remember what it was like to be human so she gets so excited to see food on a larger scale.

Midori’s size change isn’t really emphasized or acknowledged very much. Since Midori is attached to Seiji’s arm, you don't get the classic picking the tiny up to gain her trust scenes. But I love when Seiji holds/comforts her with his left hand.

I had mentioned this story to @racheyace and decided to make a whole “why the G/t community should watch Midori Days” post lol.

This anime is one of my favorite anime romance stories of all time, G/t aside!

The Manga vs the Anime: There are 13 episode in the anime and 8 volumes of the manga (85 chapters). (I have the 1st and 3rd DVD and Vol. 1-5 of the manga.)

I love the anime, it's freaking hilarious and high energy! I watched it first and it got me interested in the manga. I'd definitely recommend the manga more! The manga introduces more characters and has a more developed and believable relationship between Midori and Seiji. Not only are the relationships with the two leads more fleshed out, but most of the side characters too! Everyone has depth and motivations and it feels like their all decisions have meaning!

The time frame in the anime is just a couple of months I think, while in the manga Seiji and Midori are together for about a year. They become so close that the heart break and pain is believable by the end. I cried like a baby at the end of the manga and I felt much more satisfied with how it ended. They are both great, but if I had to recommend one, it would definitely be the Manga.

Queer Rep: The manga has a bit of queer representation! One of the characters, Kouta Shingyoji (male), develops a crush on the male lead Seiji! And Midori and Seiji help two lesbians accept each other's feelings. To quote directly from the manga: "Love surpasses sexual boundaries," this is said while showing a picture of Kouta.

Warnings: The anime is rated “13 and older” and the manga is rated “T+ for older teens.” There is some violence, adult themes, a lot of cursing, suggestive scenes, questionable scenarios, and (some) nud!ty (all bare chest nud!ty, but not always s3xualized). But I am honestly impressed, this story could have EASILY been a h3nti, but's a pretty wholesome story of young love, just with a BIZARE twist.

Where to watch/read: You can read the manga on whatever app you use, I use “Manga Geek.” I’ve seen it on a lot of manga websites too! Or find the physical copies from 2004. (If anyone has Vol. 6-8 pls let me know! I have been looking for them! 👀)

You can watch the entire anime dubbed on Youtube here: