#there would also be a couple of surprise fandoms lol
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I'm thinking about posting a few drafts/WIPs here on tumblr because I just have so so many that I want to give some life to, but they all would the things 'I'm definitely never working on again unless by a miracle'
Soo would you be interested in reading unfinished WIPs of mine knowing that I'll never write more, or would you rather just not know what you might miss?
And yes, this would include everything from all my fandoms. It's pretty much just all of the really old stuff that I still think is good, but I know in my heart I almost certainly will not write more of. (It would be a lot of washette, sorry to my new followers, congrats to my old. Like A LOT that's why I said this is the wrong choice. I'm half serious about that because "literally everything" would just be...so much. But if that's what you want, go for it)
EDIT: and by post I mean post on tumblr!! The only reason one or two might go on ao3 is because they're fully finished just maybe not super polished.
#I genuinely don't think any of my Live-A-Live wips would be included#because they all still have the possibility of me writing more#maybe this will be my dramatic final goodbye to my years long fixation on washette#I still love it of course but I know I'll most likely not write them again#certainly not any time soon#washette#turn: washington's spies#hamilton#this is about y'all truthfully lol#there would also be a couple of surprise fandoms lol
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the newsies cast still being buddies a decade later brings me SO much joy
i dont look through their stories often anymore to but decided to yesterday and was so glad that i did
alex wong (OBC sniper), adam kaplan (2013- morris and jack u/s) and michael fatica (OBC swing/dance captain) going on tommy bracco (OBC/livesies spot)'s bachelor trip?? adorable. (also, tommy and joey having a 'bachbill' made?? iconic shit)
jack sippel (toursies mush, livesies darcy/kenny), kaitlyn frank (toursies kath u/s) and demarius copes (toursies henry) posting on their stories for josh burrage (toursies/livesies jojo)'s birthday? adorable
ben cook (livesies/toursies race) and iain young (livesies/toursies finch) being at josh burrage's birthday party? adorable (iain is in the back in the burgundy tee and ben is carrying the cake!)
in conclusion i love them
#i swear im not stalking these poor men HAHA#i can never be normal about anything ever#i love them#also if i missed a few (bc less familiar w toursies/obc casts) i would not be surprised lol#or if i mixed up a couple of the credits#newsies#newsies cast#newsies fandom#joshua burrage#tommy bracco#adam kaplan#michael fatica#alex wong#jack sippel#kaitlyn frank#demarius copes#ben tyler cook#iain young
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NCT Dream and things in your shared apartment that makes sense.
Mark Lee ; subtle spiderman decorations.
It was a silly fandom joke but Mark took it seriously like lol okay spidermark we see you. So it makes sense that your shared apartment with him has some subtle spiderman decorations. And it's not like you two thought about it, it just happened that when you two go shopping and saw something spiderman-related, you two would buy it impulsively. There's a lego spiderman both in your apartment keys. A small spiderman figurine lay silently on the corner of bedside table. Or maybe there's a "I love Spiderman" magnet on your fridge too. Either way, it's cute and reminds you of your boyfriend so much.
Huang Renjun ; touches of your favorite color.
When you two first bought the shared apartment, you and Renjun discussed about the overall design of the flat, especially the color combination. Making sure that you two can come in terms, your apartment felt like a light spring because of the color combination. You two made it worked and it feels like home for the two of you! Also, you two are very meticulous with the design, like it took you guys a week to fully designed the whole apartment but it was worth it because it turned out so beautiful! <3
Lee Jeno ; everything comes in pairs!
Like. Literally. Everything. Is a pair. That's why the Dreamies would complain why you two only have two sets of plates and utensils, and Jeno would shrug, it's not like you two need more lol. The first thing you'll see is two pairs of home slippers, and key holder only has two hook. There's one long couch that only fits two people, and in the bathroom, there's a pair of toothbrush rest idly on the holder! But it's a cute way to show that the apartment is owned by a couple who's very minimal and tranquil with their life. <3
Lee Donghyuck ; mismatched decorations
I feel like the overall aesthetic of your shared apartment with Haechan is kinda chaotic but the more you stare at it, the more you think that hey, it's not that bad at all. Like it's fine that your collection of sonny angels is right next to Haechan's pc set-up. Or how a lego figurine of a sportscar is line-up on top of a cabinet and then, there's this cute miffy lamp next to it. Everything's just mismatched but it's your shared apartment, and no one seems to bat an eye at the confusing aesthetic of the apartment.
Na Jaemin ; photobooks as coffee table center
Okay mr. narcissism, it's no surprise that you have a set of photobooks on top of your coffee table. It probably contains: (1) pictures of you two on a vacation together, (2) portraits of the people he love the most, or (3) portraits of Dreamies! He swells in pride whenever there are guests and they would look into the photobook and just admire the portraits that he captured. Plus, it's placed in your shared apartment! He was just happy that his three kids hasn't chew the photobook yet, (and hopefully not!)
Zhong Chenle ; scattered bitten objects
It's not like your apartment's messy, but Daegal is such a hyper dog despite being your princess. She just loves to play and even though her teething phase is finished, she still lovesssss carrying objects to bite. You'll just go home to your apartment and find that Daegal had reached the throw pillow and now it's on the floor, ripped open with a few cottons on the floor and you couldn't be angry with her because she has her puppy eyes waiting for you. <3 Plus, you know how your boyfriend tolerates Daegal's biting habits lol.
Park Jisung ; a bed full of plushies
OH. Your bed with Jisung is just full of plushies and that's because you're obsessed with plushies and couldn't sleep without cuddling one. (Jisung would complain that you should just cuddle him instead.) He only have a few plushies there but you tend to just fill the bed that when morning comes, some of the plushies were already on the floor. You would pick them up and apologize for pushing them off the floor while your boyfriend just stares at you. But at the same time, he doesn't mind because it's like you two have a big family whenever he goes home and sees the pile of plushies on the bed.
#nct dream#nct imagines#nct dream fic#nct fic#nct x reader#nct#nct dream imagine#nct scenarios#nct fluff#nct dream reactions#nct dream imagines#nct drabbles#nct reactions#nct mark#nct jeno#nct chenle#nct renjun#nct haechan#nct jaemin#nct jisung
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Are you an orv reader who has finished the novel? Are you looking for fan content to fill the void that has been slowly consuming you?
Well you might want to check out some of these underrated orv animatics! Social media algorithms aren't always beneficial for content creators and much of their work ends up flying under the radar. In the hopes of giving these creators more attention within this fandom, I have gathered a bunch of youtube orv animatics I would personally consider underrated into this one post in no particular order. All of the videos listed here were posted sometime over a month ago and have less than 1k likes on youtube (with most being under 500) at the time of this being posted. Some are shorter while some are longer. I also encourage you to share your own favourite underrated animatics in the comments or reblogs of this post (as well as your own animatics if you have any)!
SPOILER WARNING FOR LATER PARTS OF THE NOVEL
1. epilogue || Omniscient Reader / 전독시 || PMV by LightningDG (One of my personal favourites)
2. [전독시 / Omniscient Reader] クエスチョンマーク by Morine Ei
3: [Omniscient Reader/전독시] 별생각 TMT (ORV Animatic) by jac
4: Stuck | ORV animatic by Neominthe
5. Non-Stop || ORV HSY animatic [ORV NOVEL SPOILERS] by Yule
6. love like you || an orv animatic by tulip
7. 3rd Planet | ORV Animatic by Evelina Dodge
8. [전독시 omniscient reader] pluto projector | yoohankim animatic by p
9. Harpy Hare | Omniscient Reader ORV by cracky
10. [omniscient reader’s viewpoint/전독시] LAGTRAIN (ラグトレイン) - animation by lodesterre (more of an animation than an animatic but still worth checking out!)
I may continuously update this as I find more animatics for this list! [Edit] I was messaged with a few recommendations to add to this post! I'll include some of them under here as well as a couple I've found myself. I'm also changing the formatting of the original post because it took up too much space and I wanted to keep it consistent (I'm still working out tumblr post formatting lol). 11. ORV [animatic MV] | Make up syndrome by VikaB (I'm fairly sure I've seen the creator of this one here on tumblr actually!)
12. [전독시/ORV] Colors (short orv animatic) by Johan Salad
13. [ORV] It Took Me By Surprise by Squidja's tentacle (SIDE STORY SPOILERS FOR THIS ONE)
14. beautiful stranger - joongdok orv animatic by Sora417
15. ORV Epilogue / animation by toska
16. [Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint/ORV] rolling girl | animatic by l_teri
#orv#Youtube#orv spoilers#disclaimer: none of these were made by me I just like promoting other people's work#omniscient reader's viewpoint#omniscent reader#kim dokja#omniscient reader's viewpoint spoilers#yoo joonghyuk#han sooyoung#most ancient dream#oldest dream#orv animatics#orv animatic#orv novel
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My most important sapphic ships post before Pride Month ends
What the title says, studying kept (and still keeps me) busy so we gotta go fast lol
Bumbleby (RWBY)
to the surprise of absolutely no one, they get first place (despite me not going in a particular order) because of reasons. They're perfect. Soulmates. Slowburn of all time. Yin and Yang. Eyes the color of each other's souls. Truest OTP to ever OTP in my book. ∞/10
Konosetsu (Negima!)
I already talked about them in their own post, this scene changed my life leading to my self-discovery and it still lives rent-free in my mind.
Kyosaya (Madoka Magica)
I'd also add MadoHomu but I'm trying to keep it to just one for each fandom. That said, they still make me mentally unwell. I love them, and I did for a long time now. I can't wait for the next movie to come out and suffer.
Ruby and Sapphire (Steven Universe)
These bitches had the first cartoon gay wedding and kiss DO I NEED TO SAY MORE???
Korrsami (Avatar)
Still down the queer cartoons making history path, these two made me insane back in the day because I still didn't understand I was queer and lots of sapphic couple were starting to appear in media, and I remember jokingly say how "lesbian ships were hauting me". All I can say now is "Thank you" lol. Anyway, they were incredibly important and all the people criticizing how little queerness there's in the show will never understand just how massive this scene was.
Catradora (She-Ra and the Princesses of Power)
Friends to Enemies to back to Friends to Lovers. Iconic. I still want a movie with their adventures bringing magic back to the universe.
Hollstein (Carmilla)
My third beloved blonde with a cat gf ship. I miss this web-series every day. Also, Natasha Negovanlis played an immense role in my gay awakening.
Ellie and Riley (The Last of Us: Left Behind)
Ellie and Dina are adorable and I love them, BUT I just will never get over these two. That dlc fucked me up. (also, they're in the same category with Korrasami as "gay ships that hauted me before I realized I was queer" lol)
Lumity (The Owl House)
I remember starting this show feeling it as the successor of Steven Universe, at least to me. We could say that at level of mistreatment from its parent company, it defenitely surpassed it, but at least I'm glad I was right and we got Luz and Amity becoming canon. I love these two and not a day passes without me yelling at Disney for what it did to them.
Bubbline (Adventure Time)
I actually watched Adventure Time fully only recently, but I always loved them even when I watched the show randomly when it appeared in tv back in the day. Getting to see the progression properly just made me love them even more.
Yasammy (Jurassic World: Camp Cretaceous/Chaos Theory)
Incredibly recent addition, but I am so glad that I checked out Camp Cretaceous and got into it. It's a nice show and these two are a really cute couple, their confession and especially Yaz's internal turmoil were just so on point. I was really happy to see them go still strong in Chaos Theory, and I can't wait for next season.
Pricefield (Life is Strange)
These two caused me pain in the best possible way. I felt literal heartbreak at the Bay Ending, and I was just as emotional at the Bae one (Bae > Bay Forever) I hope the new game will respect their relationship OR ELSE.
Wow, this is quite the list. I do have an amazing taste, if I do say so myself, ahah!
Well, I guess this is it for now, glad I could make it before Pride Month was over! Knowing myself I might have actually forgotten some though, so keep an eye out for possible updates (what makes me even think that you'd care? lol).
That would be all, be gay and do crimes! Bye!
#rwby#bumbleby#mahou sensei negima#konosetsu#madoka magica#kyosaya#steven universe#rupphire#avatar the legend of korra#korrasami#she ra and the princesses of power#catradora#carmilla series#hollstein#the last of us#rellie#the owl house#lumity#adventure time#bubbline#jurassic world camp cretaceous#yasammy#life is strange#pricefield#happy pride 🌈
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It's more like a birthday party
Look at the balloon streamers hanging down
It looks like it's a last hurrah for Cait before everyone parts ways, after Outlander ends filming.
Whatever it was, nothing could compare to the beauty of his gaze and his listening to her, even though 11 years had passed since their first meeting.💘💘
Dear Birthday Party Anon,
Fly a kite if you wish, but a birthday party it's still not. This actually looks rather like a more intimate get together before the larger wrap party (it did not include Greedy Driver, that being said, and there is an obvious reason for it):
Also obvious it did not happen in a hotel, or something. This is someone's flat, for all intents and purposes. See the improvised shelved home bar on the left, featuring a proudly displayed SS Gin bottle (red arrow, LOL), a couple of more expensive whiskies and some Dom Pérignon champagne - wee closeup:
Perhaps Vandervaart's rental flat in GLA? After all, someone did order some burgers from MacDonald's, who does deliver at home, too, in GLA:
S has the same outfit as for the wrap party:
as compared to...
Same pocket square. Surely, he owns more than one suit, right?
After that, they went to the party as a group, in a rented van, something they also did before Taylor Swift's concert, if you remember:
I would be very surprised if C's birthday was mentioned way ahead of the day, to be honest. I mean, it's technically not impossible, but I very much doubt it was the focus of their gathering.
I understand this fandom (all sides of it, actually) is very thirsty for more, but maybe it would be wiser to wait a minute before posting nonsense just for the sake of it?
Your last phrase, well - of course I agree. It's been like this from Day One, Anon.
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Ahm... HAPPY BIRTHDAY JK
And happy JK day Jikookers.
What a morning to wake up to!!!
You open your eyes and this is what you are hit with.
The black and white couple in BLACK & WHITE.
Happy birthday Kookie indeed.
Yes, that was JM's hashtag: Happy birthday Kookie or Kookie's birthday, depending on your translator.
I am definitley still processing.
Well JM, you have definitely out done yourself.
Better than even this:
Ok then, did I not say that JM will not disappoint us? He NEVER does!!!
And yes. JM posted it to his account. Not a story. Not something that will be deleted or go away within 24 hours.
No.
JM posted this photo of the two of them in Connecticut on his IG timeline for forevers!!! Right next to his hot boyfie's Hot 100 post.
Yes JM, we know your boyfie is Hot and he's all yours. And you have now told us all just that. You claimed him!!! He is definitley yours.
Had a hoot reading the comments, lol. Someone asking if they are together, and the answers. Many answer yes (surprising), but then, the denial some people are in. Besties. Brothers. Ok then. 🤣🤣🤣 Those calling them besties are probably same ones that ignore Jikook moments, ot7-fy them, dismiss them, but now they are besties... Well, my partner is also my bestie, so...
Good thing my timeline is curated, lol. I cannot imagine the way the fandom is imploding. I think this is kind of a good description though:
So yeah, JM did not disappoint.
And dropping it at the start of the day for all of us to go nuts for the whole day too, lol.
Now, doing that, posting so early on (may I remind you that the last couple of years he posted toward the end of the birthday or even just after the day ended?), I cannot help wonder if there is more coming for us today...
I mean, JK's live, well an 9 minute live, an all new record for him. Funny how his records are how short his lives are, lol.
What do we know so far?
JK was out to dinner with others that he was practicing with.
Took photos with fans that saw him out.
Posted for his birthday on 31.8.23 at 23:55 or 11:55 pm.
Coming home, still in same outfit as he was eating out, JK goes live for 9 minutes. A new record low (well, apart from his Mingyu live), lol. Shorter than his panty folding live.
He was a man on a mission. Coming to say hi.
Showing us the 2 aces. Army. Yep.
Doing a card trick.
Saying love ya, a term used multiple time by JM.
And diving out of there.
So, I wonder.
First of all, was there someone there already or someone he was expecting to arrive?
Same someone that posted that mind blowing pic to set the fandom on fire.
JK's live was at 00:55 am KST. Going for 9 minutes approx. JM posted at 1:33 am KST. I wonder. I wonder if they picked out that photo together, lol.
Oh, I got sidetracked, didn't I?
Because my point was meant to be: Is this all we are getting this year?
No cake? No long karaoke live? No long live period? No TikTok post from our birthday boy, who told us he is now a TikTok content creator? No Jikook live?
I mean, JM's pic, well it's a gift. But is it gift enough?
And no, I'm not being greedy here talking about a gift for us. I'm talking about a gift for JK. Because JK wants that damn live together. Giving him that live together, that would definitely be a worthy gift for his birthday!! Lol.
Just saying...
Did I mention everything I wanted to? Probably not. I'm writing this off the top of my head rushing to post, cause I need for this to be out there, like 2 hours ago, lol.
Kind of hoping that as the day goes by there will be more to talk about. Kind of counting on it, lol.
Oh wait, did I mention JK was wearing same brand as JM?
Ooh, and forgot to mention that PolyC reposted JM's post:
And last thing before I go:
I just loooooove seeing that JM, can't help myself.
Ok, so this gif does not do the JM justice. Watch the live and see just how pronounced it is!!! LOOOOOOOVE it.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY KOOKIE!!!
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The romance with Noa and Soona feels shoehorned lol. It was like halfway through the film the writers remembered that the main lead needed a female love interest. I feel no chemistry between them, and Noa never gives those intense gazes or even looks at Soona for longer than a few seconds, (as compared to a certain somebody *ehem* 👀). I also don't want poor Anaya to become a third wheel all of a sudden 😔
Usually, I tend to stick quite closely to the canon of the stories, and it would surprise you to see how I'm quite a shipper of couples that are very unpopular in some fandoms, but if they're not canon, they're almost like they are, and I defend them to the death even if I'm alone in the battle. But they always have in common that they are well constructed, the characters have chemistry, and there's consistency. In the case of Noa and Soona, it feels very forced to me. I mean, yes, I understand the childhood friends-to-lovers trope, but honestly, throughout the entire film, you completely forget that supposedly Noa has a crush on her. They have to remind you narratively several times, and that clashes with the main idea of any script, which is precisely 'show don't tell.' For me, the most WTF scene when it comes to taking Noa/Soona seriously is the fact that when Proximus makes him choose between her and Mae, he doesn't know what the hell to do. I mean, I get that Noa is a good guy and has quite a few ethical principles and clearly he doesn't want anyone to die because of his decisions. He's the hero, I get it. But come on, you're choosing between a girl you literally met like four days ago and your childhood friend who supposedly is also your crush, shouldn't your first instinct be to save her even if you later reconsider and have moral doubts? It's something I don't see, and honestly, if they really intended to make Noa's attachment to Soona seem realistic, they should have approached everything differently. And I'm not saying this as someone who has other ship preferences but as a simple script analyst here.
#kingdom of the planet of the apes#planet of the apes#kotpota#kotpota noa#kotpota mae#kotpota soona#i don't know if it's lazy writting or they're not really invest in that couple
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would u consider obey me a dead fandom?
Um. Nope. I sure wouldn't.
If there's anybody out there who thinks Obey Me is a dead fandom, I would say they're probably confused about what a dead fandom actually is.
I think an argument could be made saying that there is no such thing as a dead fandom. But I'm going to assume you mean that fan content is at an all time low.
Friend, I have been in fandoms where the content was like... you get a fic or two every year if you're lucky. This for a media that hadn't put out any new content in decades.
Obey Me? I get an average of five asks per day about Obey Me. I can queue 10 posts per day about Obey Me. I still average over 800 notes a day on this here Obey Me blog. In the past few months, we've had new artists and writers joining the community and posting their Obey Me fan works. The game is still active and updating. There are two apps even.
So no, I personally would not consider the Obey Me fandom to be dead by any means.
It's certainly been more active in the past. I'll never forget the surge of activity that happened when Nightbringer first came out. My Solomon fics seemed to double their notes over night lol.
But we're also in a bit of a lull right now because we aren't getting new chapters. Every time an event happens, there's another burst of activity. And then things die down just a little before they surge again. That's the nature of fandom.
Another common fandom thing is people coming and going. I've been here for almost two years, but there are others who have been here for four. And then there are some people who've only been in the fandom for a couple months. And then there are the people who were here at the beginning, but have since moved on. Maybe they only stayed for a few months before moving on. Maybe they're only casually in the fandom, dipping in now and again. This is also just the nature of fandom. There's no right way to do it. And it doesn't reflect on whether a fandom is alive or dead.
Hell, we even have plenty of discourse and toxic stuff in this here fandom, too. More of that when there's nothing else to do, I think, which is unfortunate, but also kinda... just part of fandom.
And all of this is just how it is on Tumblr. I know there are active Obey Me communities on Twitter/X and Instagram, too. I'm just too old and tired to maintain that many socials. I actually have accounts on both of those apps but I rarely use them.
And lastly, I'm a big proponent of being involved in fandom no matter how active the community is. By this I mean, if I still have an Obey Me hyperfixation in ten years when the apps are closed down and nearly everybody else has moved on, I will still be here posting fic. Because I won't leave a fandom until I am ready to move on from it, dead or not. (Sometimes this can mean you are one of the few people still creating for said fandom, but you might be surprised at how many people will still enjoy what you create.)
#tl;dr this fandom is far from dead lol#my tendency to ramble is why I included the short answer at the very top#obey me#obey me nightbringer#anon asks#misc answers
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For the ask game, 1, 3, 15, and 28!
Thank you for the ask, Dawn ❤️ Starting with the last question because if I want anyone to remember one thing from this post, it's those recs so putting this in the Clegan tag for more visibility for the fic recs🫡
28. Share three of your favorite fic writers and why you like them so much
The Mota fandom has so many talented writers who share absolute masterpieces so it was so so hard to narrow it down to 3 but I tried to put 3 authors I don't see as often as others in fic recs post and I hope that for those who don't know them, this'll be your sign to read their works ❤️ So, in no particular order and wih hope that I didn't mess up any link :
@amiserableseriesofevents (Link to AO3)
I devour absolutely every single one of Ginia's fics, even those that tear my heart apart because she's the devil and she loves to make everyone suffer. Some of her fics are the definition of "The love is there. It just simply isn't enough" and all of her fics are "The love is there". The way she writes the Buckies falling in love in different ways is so beautiful every single time, no matter what situation she's put them in. I remember Love At Second Sight to be one of the first fics I've ever read for Clegan and it'll always be one of my It fic. Also I think it takes a special kind of skills to be able to write characters in AU while keeping the essence of those characters because they are so shaped by canon that it can be hard to see who they are if you take those circumstances away but Ginia nails it every single time. She has a couple of different AUs, but they're all undeniably John and Gale, and reading them falling in love and getting together in all those different situations is so so wonderful because with her writing it doesn't feel like you're reading but more like you're there, like a little familiar on the protagonist shoulder <3 Only nobody hears when you inevitably howl because there was too much feeling for you to handle lol
Special mentions to those stories that have my entire heart :
I think the love I bear you should make you not to die or the Timelines AU my beloved, precious darling
The man I've looked for that may or may not be one of my comfort fics of all time
ships in the night aka I might just die if they don't meet again and their almost stays an almost because this AU has my life, I would sacrifice anything to have more of them
@caustinen (Link to AO3)
Obviously there's the Hollywood AU that has a very special place in my heart but every headcanon and fic of theirs 😍 I think about those quite often, especially sharp dressed man that's one of my favorite smut fic in the clegan tag! I just love their overall takes on Gale and John, and on Clegan. Even if it's not set in canon, it's always so clearly them that you have no difficulty picturing them in that universe and that really is a feat ❤️ And the diversity of all those universes is mindblowing, I love it, so much creativity and different scenarios to put the Buckies in 🥹
@majorbuckyegan (Link to AO3)
Definitely one of those writers I get a fangirl moment for when they write a comment on one of my fics lol, their never saw the sun shining so bright fic (or Five kisses that Bucky stole from Buck, and one kiss that Buck stole in return) lives in my head rent-free. I can't tell you how many times I've read it and imagined it as a daydream to help me fall asleep, it's one of my favorite fics in the entire world. Also I read it when I hadn't watched Mota yet so that's one of the fics that introduced me to them and I wouldn't be surprised if my own characterization of the Buckies is lowkey inspired by those works like this one that I've read before watching the show. It's so soft and tender, and yet you never really forget the war. The war is everywhere but so is the love and the balance between the two in every single fic is an absolute gem every time. For tonight, let's love like there's no goodbye is also one of my favorite fics in the fandom, the way you just go into John's head and his thoughts and you can feel how much they love each other is so 🥹❤️❤️
It's come to my attention that all three of these writers are also fantastic smut writers so that's important too, especially because personally, I'm not too much of a smut person, my favorite parts of smut are the feelings involved lol, and all three write pure love making, the feelings are so beautiful and merge so well with the smut, I love it 🥹
Also cheating a bit because technically that's a fourth writer but I have to mention you, Dawn 🥹 The Atonement AU is especially dear to my heart, and the snippets you've shared with us are absolutely stunning! I'm truly in love with your writing style, I don't know how to explain it but it's like the love Gale and John have for each other is so raw that it actually kind of chokes me up a bit, because it's so big and they love each other so much 🥹 And the way you weave words together is so lyrical and gripping that you don't just read what they're feeling, you're feeling it with them if you know what I mean. And I'm repeating myself but, even if I know it might not save them, the love in your writing is so overwhelming that it's obvious that you're loving writing it and that might be my favorite part of it <3
This was very nice to do, it's been a while since I've dived in my bookmarks like that! Also served me as a reminder that most of those 180 Clegan fics were bookmarked before I got the nerve to start commenting on fics so adding on the new Year's resolution to go through them again and leave a comment <3
That got very long so under the read more are the answers to the other questions :)
1. Describe your comfort zone—a typical you-fic.
Well. A typical me-fic starts as a could-be-2k-fic then I start yapping and it ends up over 6k so I suppose I'll try to think of what makes me yap the most. Definitely either pining that the protagonist (usually Gale lol) doesn't see is mutual or the Buckies already being in love and them waxing poetry about each other 🥹 So fluffy/pining love with too many metaphors is probably my comfort zone 🫡
3. Is there a trope you wouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole?
I don't know if it's a trope per say, but horror or too gory stuff I'd say. I'm not really into reading it so writing it would be pure suffering I think 😂 Whump and wounds I might dip my toes in but body horror, painful transformation are definitely not in my range
15. If you could choose one of your fics to be filmed, which would you choose?
Oooh this is so tough because when I write I see the scenes in my head like a movie, like the camera closing on certain elements for examples 😭
I'd say either I'm On The Run With You My Sweet Love because I love the setting of the lake in a summer's day, how carefree they can both be and the softness of their love or Never Coming Down With Your Hand In Mine because I could see it so clearly in my mind while I was writing it, the way their hands compliment each other and the contrast between how rough they look vs how gentle they are with the other. Also I could really see the winter light filtering through the window, with little feckles of dust in the air and you can see them sitting side by side, all reddened cheeks from the cold that turn to blushes because they're both in love 🥹 I would love to see Gale's sweet face as he smiles at the ground and John's looking at him so fondly and loving 🥹 The shot of Gale squeezing John's hand back would be so special to me 🥹
#soliloquy-dawn#ali's fic recs#it feels so nice to promote other writer's stuff this made my day#pls take this as a snack while you wait for me to go through my bookmarks to comment them 🥹#clegan#asks
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Hi!! I just spent the last hour scrolling through your page and I adore everything you have to say about tim and lucy…
So I was curious (because I’m a month into the fandom and I don’t really know anyone yet) what your thoughts, predictions, expectations for season 7 would be?
Sorry if you’ve posted something similar before, please point me in the right direction if you have :)
- Loren
Hi! @moderatelydelusional Nice to meet you, Loren. Thank you for the lovely ask :) Making me all red with your nice comment. So glad you liked everything I've had to say about our lovely ship. Appreciate it so much. Before I answer I want to say welcome to the fandom! We are glad to have you here. 😊 There are so many good blogs on tumblr for them. Glad you chose me as one of them. I am honored. ❤️ I haven't really tackled s7 at all so this is a good ask. Excited to answer it. I'm a detailed woman. So imma break your question down into sections if that's alright. I legit don't know how to be brief about this show or them haha Also will do it with gifs cause that's my thing. Here is my detailed answer below. Hope you enjoy it.
Thoughts on S7- Well we've had ZERO and I mean ZERO spoilers or indicators about this upcoming season. Which I do love them keeping it close to the vest. Honestly I do. Just means they have something incredibly good lined up. They just want to make sure we are surprised. Can't fault them for that. But I'm dying for anything. The end of s6 left us wanting so much more with the scene above. We are all chomping at the bit for any content. I know Eric had a interview couple weeks back about s7. From what little he was able to divulge I am EXCITED.
Here is the link to it. Talks about Tim needing to EARN Lucy back in more ways than one. How she is the love of his life. (Tell us something we don't know haha) But I love Eric referring to her to as such. The personal development for Tim to come as well. Like I said they haven't given us much of anything yet. It's hard to have thoughts when we don't have much to go on. But it seems like it'll be well rounded season. It's always been a character driven show so I think it'll be more than just our ship. Which is fine with me. It is an ensemble cast after all.
I fell in love with this show as a whole when it first launched back in 2018. Give me more Tim/Angela, Lucy/Nyla and Wopez. I'll take all of that. I have been all in from the Pilot. I remember watching it on my lunch break on my phone when it first premiered. I was hooked. When we finally get a promo and a friggin premiere date I can probably be more in depth with my answer. Since we don't have a lot to go on it's hard to have in depth thoughts ha But from what little they've let out I'm quite excited for the journey we're going to embark on. We just need a start date for said journey. All we know is Jan but I need a hard date LOL
Expectations For S7. -I expect Chenford to get back to the softness above. It won't be easy but I expect we are headed back there. I think it's gonna be quite the journey to get us there. Both Tim and Lucy are going to need to grow before we do. They both still have shit to work out. Lucy with her career path and the rough time she had last year. It wasn't just Tim that crushed her. I mean it was a huge headliner but wasn't the ONLY one. Our girl has some communication problems and is like her soulmate in how she handles emotional distress. Expect that to be addressed on some level.
Tim obviously has a lot to make up for and he knows it. That is the first step. I expect we see Tim working constantly to improve himself as a person. To be worthy of Lucy again. He's not going to half ass his healing. He is going to be very Tim in how he goes after it. This is going to bleed into every part of his life. I expect to see that all over his character development in s7.
I also anticipate that we'll see an even stronger and more refined version of Chenford in Season 7, with their characters continuing to grow and evolve. Strong separately and even more so together. I cannot wait for the slow burn of their reconciliation. Going to make all the hurt worth it. It'll be Chenford 2.0 and we are all going to be grateful for that. While losing our minds together it's happening. I would rather have our ship and characters be real and develop. Better that than to be puddle deep like John/Bailey. I'll take the pain of growth over the stagnation of boredom. i.e. Bailian.
Predictions-Obviously I want to predict something like above. Them starting over. Kisses, hugs, and if we're lucky enough to get a repeat of 5x12 on screen. That one I'm straight just trying to manifest lol Possibly Celina catching them or almost doing so when they get back together at her place. These are more hopeful than actual predictions lmao But I mainly predict a deeper intimacy between them when they do reconcile. Stronger communication. It'll be beautiful. I also think we're about to see a side of Tim Bradford we haven't seen before. As we know Lucy brings out the best in this man. The absolute best. We're going to see that on full display.
I think he will continue therapy. I also think we’re going to see a very determined Tim driven in his quest to make amends to Lucy. Which will bring out that new side we haven't seen. It's one of the facets of s7 that has me most excited. And not just for the Chenford portion. (Which does make me giddy to no end) But for him as well. You follow me long enough you'll know I love Tim development. So this excites me so very much.
We watched Tim take strides in his mental health walk and as a person in s6 after 6x07. I expect we're going to see the fruit of that not just in his amends to Lucy. But professionally as well. Tim took quite the fall professionally after being bounced out of Metro. He has fences to mend to Grey, Lt. Pine, and those around him as well in patrol. I see him making those strides and then some.
I predict Lucy is going to finally going to get grounded professionally and personally. (She does have a new roommate. I can see development here too) Lucy got very lost in s6. I think s7 she will be righting her ship. Finding her purpose. My guess was T.O. for her with her dipping her toe with Celina in 6x08. She's so empathetic and willing to slow down and teach. I think that could be a good path for her. Whatever her trajectory is I think it's going to be be worked out in s7 for our girl. It's time for her to get some damn wins. I hope that answers your ask LOL Or maybe was too much? HA Either way I can't wait for s7. I need a promo and a premiere date. Seriously ABC, you're killing us.
#chenford#the rookie#s7#asked and answered#moderatelydelusional#tim x lucy#otp: doing my job#otp: unless it is#the rookie s7#tim bradford#lucy chen#tim bradford x lucy chen
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wow, I went to the comments under one YouTube video and people there hated charlastor so much. I was so surprised, I got the impression that the fandom doesn’t like this particular couple, but not the ship with Alastor as a whole... it’s so strange.. I understand if the whole fandom would like “you can’t ship Alastor with anyone because blablabla” but to be specifically against the charlastor, giving the only idiotic example with that bullshit from the song about a father and daughter .. or saying “ugh people just ship them only because of the pilot episode (as if this ep suddenly ceased to be canon lol).. .like ..why? Why all of a sudden such hostility? are people just tired of this couple because it was popular when the pilot came out? but then why is there no such problem with Alastor x Angel Dust? I remember this was also a popular ship for everyone who wanted a ship but didn’t want a hetero ship. I don’t communicate with the fandom and maybe I don’t understand something, but really, where does all this hatred come from? When you have two characters who are partners in something and at the same time they are opposite to each other but somehow interact normally and share common non-trivial traits, like a sense of humor, a love of dancing and singing… then I think it’s pretty obvious ground for the ship. you may not like it, but you can't deny it or say that "I don't understand why someone ships this" because… well, you apparently have problems with your eyes.
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Decrescendo (CoD) John Price x OC
18+ blog • minors dni
content: fluff, hurt/comfort, smut
warning: military inaccuracies, human trafficking, implied sexual trauma
word count: 30.2k
summary: Her personal mission of infiltrating a human-trafficking ring had been a success and an opportunity to escape the leader presented itself when her colleagues raided their base. As she readjusted to her normal life, flames are kindled and tears are shed. She had found her way back home in the people she held dear and she awaits the day her sister would come home too.
a/n: so. I got lured into the cod fandom through good smut writing. fr truly changed the smut scene for me ngl. also, despite the title, there's nothing musical in this lol. and I realised while proofreading that the romance isn't as focussed on as I thought it was, woops. happy reading!!
cod masterlist • ao3
It was a noisy night.
The assignment was straightforward; infiltrate the target organisation’s base, preferably capture the human-trafficking ringleader alive, and hack into their system to download their records. Nothing new, nothing surprising. So why was it, the boys wondered, that they had found themselves struck confused at the scene before them?
The mission flowed seamlessly, there was nothing of note as they took down the two-story hideout’s members guarding the boss in his office. They had lost a couple of their own – as inevitable as it was upsetting – but they had eventually managed to reach their destination at the top floor. Eyeing the team to gauge their preparedness to tackle the final room, Captain John Price gave a solid nod after his orders before he slammed the locked doorknob open. Immediately bullets came barrelling through the wood, as expected, and the boys waited for a moment of pause before rushing into the room and assuming positions to cut the corners and aim at those who had a gun pointed to them, save for the man in the back, middle of the room, in front of the of the office table.
A feminine voice shrieked fearfully as the organisation’s men collapsed one by one. Veterans in their skills, none of Price’s men had taken a fatal shot by the time the battle died down. That ended up with the ringleader coming into a faceoff with the British S.A.S. men, the rest of the Price’s team settling themselves outside the room to watch for any stray attacks. It was only then, that the boys had noticed the woman in the room, stood behind their target who had an arm out in front of her protectively as his other hand held a gun trained onto Price. Intel had told them that the leader had a woman, but they had also been briefed that he would be in a meeting during their attack. They had not expected for the unnamed lady to grace them with her presence that evening.
“Claudio Agustine. You’re outnumbered, I suggest you surrender this instance.”
Agustine scoffed with a manic grin etched onto his lips. “You’ve come here for my records, no? Unfortunately for you, I’ve reset the computers in this building so you can’t access the data here.”
The boys cursed under their breaths when they realised that they really do have to capture Agustine alive now so that they didn’t end this assignment empty-handed and for naught. One of them, Johnny “Soap” MacTavish, spoke into his radio to update the team on their situation and, understandably, received the new order to keep Agustine alive.
At Soap’s callout to Kate Laswell’s alias, the tearful woman cowering behind Agustine perked up her ears. The flag patched onto the unexpected attackers’ uniform and their overall familiar design had kindled hope in her at first glance, but now with the confirmation that the men operated under Laswell’s command, she was confident that she had been blessed by the Grace. Her thoughts remained locked in her though, and she easily let none of it slip past her frightened expression and trembling figure. Now, to find an opening to take her chance…
Thinking that he was in the superior standing to propose an exchange, Agustine continued, “you take me in, that I cannot escape, but you must also take Tara.” Tara, the woman whom he loves, made a sound of surprised confusion in the back of her throat, one that she did not have to fake, as she snapped her head up to look at her ‘protector’. “You treat her well – the best she deserves – and let me keep her beside me at all times.”
Ah, Tara realised, he really was head over heels for her – and selfish, of course. Once again, her disdain for the man went unknown as she batted her eyelash up at him like a lovesick fool. “Oh, Claude! How could I ever stay away from you even in these circumstances!”
Baffled at her breathless tone as she sobbed pathetically at the idea of parting with her lover, the men unanimously thought of her to be a bimbo, unknowingly playing into her success.
Price corresponded with Laswell this time, giving a slight instinctual nod at her response despite her inability to see it. “Alright, Agustine. You get your wish. Drop your weapons and hands up where I can see ‘em.”
Agustine, always a difficult person to work with due to his own faults, opted not to let go of his gun but instead, clicked the safety on and aimed it at the ceiling with his hand up in a ‘white-flag’ hold. His other hand went up to caress Tara’s cheek lovingly, his eyes gleaming with adoration – and specks of apprehension at his situation – as he gazed upon her eyes.
“Oh, sweetheart. I promise that everything will be just fine, yeah?”
He had loosened his grip on the gun; now was her chance. Just as the men took a step forward to begin apprehending Agustine, Tara moved. Speed unmatched and unexpected to everyone, her movements were a blur. One moment, the couple seemed like they were sinking down the Titanic together, helpless but in love, and the next, Tara had flipped Agustine onto the floor, body facing up, and she had his gun trained onto his head as she stood above him. Her face went blank, an expression she had befriended in the darkness of the nights for the past half a year; gone were the affections she had been faking for the man under her, who had his hands around his neck where she had struck earlier as he wheezed.
Hence, the stupefied looks on the boys’ face at the turn of events that the mission had taken.
“Swe- et- hea-” a sharp gasp, “-rt?”
Tara’s eyes narrowed. She flicked off the safety switch in the gun she held – hers, for now – and trailed its aim onto the floor beside his head before pulling the trigger and returning her aim onto him. The sudden single sound was blaring enough to cut off Agustine’s wheezes for a quick moment, disbelief clear in his eyes as he stilled in place.
“Call me that again and the next one goes into your eye.”
Managing to snap out into clarity for a moment, Price started, “we need him alive, lo- uh… Tara.”
Her eyes didn’t leave their sights on her ‘lover’ and a sardonic grin made its way to her lips. “Fret not, sir. I’ll make sure not to hit his brain.”
Understanding was beginning to cross Agustine’s features and Tara was undeterred by the hurt and anger flickering in his expression.
Remembering his concealed knife, Tara’s eyes flickered to his right hip and in a split moment, shot at where it was attached to his strap with easy precision. Ignoring his cries, she brought a foot out to kick away the sheath and its dagger towards the group of men who were still watching with a total loss of grip at the situation.
When Agustine went to clutch at his hip, Tara feigned sympathy and crooned at him. “Aww, did I somehow graze you, darling? Are you in pain?” Venom dripped from her mocking tone and Agustine gulped – with immense difficulty – at the unbridled disdain she now let loose in her façade. She huffed when she received no response and turned to the military men instead.
One of them, the big guy on the left sporting a skull mask, had his gun targeted on her and she silently respected his suspicion of her. Price stood slightly in front of the rest of the squad and so, she decided to address him. “Sergeant Levina Riven, previously under the direct orders of Captain Joshua Mavers. Likely presumed dead following my failed evac on the assignment to infiltrate Agustine’s West Manford base early this February.”
Their doubts were obviously etched onto their skins. Price relayed Tara’s – Levina’s – claimed identity to Laswell, along with his description of her appearance.
“Sounds like her. I’ll have Mavers confirm her identity when she’s here. Stay vigilant.”
The boys narrowed their eyes in suspicion to which she only responded with an innocent tilt of her head. Her gun remained unmoving as she kept Agustine in her peripherals.
“Right. We’ll have to keep you in custody until we get back to HQ. Same thing, drop your weapon and hands up.”
Levina frowned for a moment as she turned back to Agustine, who was now fuming at her deception, before clicking on the safety and tossing her gun towards the men. Now, not being held at gunpoint and under a false sense of security at the thought that he could overpower the woman, Agustine raised his torso and reached for Levina’s nearest leg. However quick his actions were, her senses were sharper and she clocked his incoming attack before he could touch her. She brought a leg up and slammed it down onto his thighs mercilessly, her stiletto heels digging into the flesh down to its hilt as blood splattered out. Agustine let out a pained scream, again when she lifted her foot up to expose his wound, and tears escaped him uncontrollably as he tentatively clutched at his leg.
Unwavering, Levina only clicked her tongue at the ruined state of her heels before giving the astounded men her full attention. She obediently offered her hands out towards them with a saccharine smile playing on her lips. “You’re free to arrest me now.”
In the discord of sobs and curses, bathed in the calm haze of the moon, Levina’s eyes gleamed devilishly.
The men wasted no time in apprehending both their targets after that. Upon the failure of salvaging anything from the computers in the building, the group made it back to the outskirts of the base where they were then picked up by their ride.
Levina spent the entire ride with her eyes locked onto the floor, deep in thought, as she tuned out Agustine’s whimpers – the medic had patched him up during the flight – and the whirring of the helicopter. No one had tried engaging her in a conversation, much to her relief, and exhaustion carried through the air.
The sun was peeking over in the horizon as they began to land. Soon enough, everyone was making their way out of the vehicle to greet the rest of the team holding the fort down. Levina stayed amongst the back of the group and watched as Laswell said something to Agustine before ordering her men to take him to his cell. She caught Laswell’s eyes when the latter skimmed her gaze over the team and she was ordered to come forward. Laswell hummed in acknowledgement when she stated her name and rank before looking off to the side to beckon Mavers forward. His eyes took Levina in with heightened suspicion, trailing over her features, before he nodded resolutely in confirmation.
“Sergeant Riven!” The aforementioned woman straightened up further. “Welcome back.”
“Thank you, Captain.”
The apprehension in Laswell only cleared up slightly as she regarded her returned subordinate. She then called for the higher-ups to join her for a debrief, which Levina was to follow along, and dismissed the others before leading the way to her office.
Once again, Laswell called Levina forward while the others settled themselves around the room.
“State your reason as to your role in Agustine’s ranks.”
Levina’s hands were still tied behind her as a precaution so she couldn’t give her salute and started explaining immediately. “Ma’am. My team had been tasked with the assignment to infiltrate Agustine’s base in West Manford early this February. We managed to retrieve only half the data when Agustine’s backup arrived. I was separated from my team during the evac following their ambush in the woods and managed to escape to the riverside with my radio busted. I came across a town after a few days and stayed there under the generosity of an old lady who had come across me. The town had little to no technology so there was no way of establishing comms with HQ.
“I met Agustine in the pub there one night and made the impulsive decision to settle for a long-con and flirt my way into his ranks to gain intel on his organisation. By the third month, I was allowed into his most confidential of meetings and I now have the locations of his operations, the identity of the big-name buyers, and the partners of his association to my knowledge. It was only recently that I began planning an escape but it seemed that I have been beaten to it with the arrival of your team.”
An eyebrow raised in respect for Levina’s efforts, Laswell nodded approvingly. “We’ll get someone to curate your intel in a moment. Meanwhile, it is odd that you have chosen to work alone just to take down Agustine. Why made you decide to avenge your loss?”
Hesitance shone in Levina with the way she kept silent for a moment. Knowing there was no way out of answering her superior, however, she eventually cleared the air.
“Sergeant Richard Shane had recognised the victims in the records as missing persons during the initial assignment. He was scrolling down the list of the victim’s pictures when I came across…” her breath caught in her throat as her memory of that moment before they got ambushed flickered in her mind, “my sister.”
Laswell’s eyes softened with sympathy and Levina didn’t have to look around to know that the others were looking at her similarly.
“My deepest condolences. We have started tracking down the buyers whose identities were included in the victim’s records but we have not come across another ‘Riven’ amongst the ones that we have managed to obtain.” Laswell offered her a reassuring smile, “rest assured, Sergeant. With the intel you will provide, we will track her down eventually.”
Levina willed her voice to not crack as she replied, “yes, Ma’am.”
Laswell had Price release the rope tying her hands together and she flexed them to get the blood rushing once again.
She stayed even as Laswell then began to debrief the current assignment, staying silent as she listened. Once they had been dismissed, Laswell led her to a transcriber who would take note of her 4 months’ worth of knowledge of Agustine’s meetings. The task ended up taking hours and before she knew it, she had missed breakfast. Coming to save her grumbling stomach, however, came in the form of Sergeant Ardour Crawley, her previous – was she still to be under Captain Mavers’ command? – teammate.
Word had spread of the return of a presumed killed-in-action colleague that morning and Mavers had confirmed Levina’s presence earlier. Crawley had noticed her absence in the canteen though and took it upon himself to save a sandwich for the woman. They ended up sitting on a bench overlooking the men in training as Crawley caught her up on the past over half a year’s updates and gossips while she munched on her food.
“… and that group of four became known as the team that were called upon whenever the military wanted to get. Shit. Done.” Crawley punctuated for dramatic emphasis which earned a hum of understanding from Levina. “I’m glad they were the ones who ended up rescuing you, they’re a capable lot after all.”
In his Grace, he didn’t confront her on her lack of words and wandering gaze. He was used to her noncommittal hums which told him that her attention was still on him, but he did get concerned when her only response thus far had been an “oh…” when he had told her of the demise of the rest of her original team over the past months – a few had died in that same assignment in West Manford while the rest met their ends in other missions.
To his dismay, Crawley had to leave soon enough to return to his duties. His worry placated slightly when Levina shot him a reassuring smile, but her sudden expressiveness had also brought upon more concern for her well-being. So, with a final sad smile – he would’ve patted her back if not for the way she had flinched when he hugged her in greeting earlier – he left her to her thoughts.
Levina had a few hours to spend before she had to meet with Laswell again after lunch. “To talk about your next steps,” the Station Chief had said, “I’ll let you think through it until then.”
Prior to her unexpected rescue from Agustine, Levina had only started to think about her preliminary strategies as to how to escape Agustine’s clutches and relate her intel back to the military. She had not thought further onto what she would do if she managed to make it back to HQ. Now that she was here, in all her glory of trauma and weariness, she could only think of resting her psyche after seven months of acting like a bimbo; to go home and reassure her father of her ‘alive’ status, despite the news of her death that had arrived in a phone call all those months ago.
She didn’t doubt Laswell’s humanity – surely she’ll be willing to give her at least a few days off? In the off-chance that she wouldn’t be granted time off, however, Levina had no qualms in retraining into a skilful S.A.S. soldier as that was what she was good at. So, perhaps the question isn’t about what she would do now that she was safely away from Agustine; instead, she had to ask herself: will she ever feel back to herself again?
Somewhere during the seven months of operating as a different person, she had lost a part herself. The mental exhaustion that came with keeping up her pretence as an incapable-of-thought woman, whose personality was only being pretty, meant the occasional thought in her mind to revert back to that state of being. Moreover, she was tired of putting up animated expressions that had once charmed Agustine, and now it took a lot of effort to even put on an expression that was something other than ‘blank’. Long, had she numbed herself to listening to the heartless chatter of Agustine’s men as they talked about their business. She feared losing herself to the extent that she grew to stop caring – she felt palliated to know that her fear at least told her of the remaining humanity still left in her.
Then, there was also physical affection. Agustine had been a physical man; after all, it took only a couple of weeks before she became a regular in his bed.
When she first made up her mind to conduct the long-con against Agustine, one of the things that fought against the decision had been the idea of becoming a prostitute for the disgusting man. One factor had been the fact that she had been a virgin prior to Agustine, and that she had wanted to save it for a more respectable man – a hopeless romantic she had been, perhaps even now in the depths of her heart. There had never been someone in her life who she got to call her lover. As a result, all the romantic affections she had ever received would forever be associated with that sorry excuse of a man, at least until the next time she found someone she decided was worthy to love her. She wasn’t an active pursuer of love, though – despite her dream to fall in love one day – so it was uncertain just how long it would be until she could escape associating romantic and physical affections with Agustine. That is, if there was even someone out there who would want her, broken and lost as she feels.
Levina was snapped out of her thoughts when she felt a presence in the space next to her, on the bench. She turned to the figure and regarded the stranger with a questioning gaze – it seemed that for the meantime, as her expressions worked on themselves to start showing up again, her emotions have settled on communicating with her eyes – his face familiar amongst the men that had a showdown with Agustine earlier.
“Sergeant Kyle Garrick, or more commonly, ‘Gaz’.” Gaz extended a hand out and Levina offered her hand only after a beat of tentative silence.
Still mindful of her manners, she managed to speak in a quiet voice. “Sergeant Levina Riven.”
The reflection of her empty shell was a huge contrast to the adrenaline-filled woman Gaz had met earlier, but he only kept that thought in himself as sympathy washed over him. He had seen his fair share of soldiers with trauma, and he only dreaded to think what Levina had to go through to stay by Agustine’s side under an act.
Kind soul that he is, he offered an unopened bottle of water to her. “One of the hotter Autumn days, the forecast said. You’ve been out here for a while and I don’t see any sources of hydration around you.”
In the same low voice, she muttered a “thank you” and took the bottle, untwisting the cap before taking only a small sip of it despite the intense heat that she had not even registered. Gaz knew better than to force her to drink more, a small win is a win, nonetheless. He, too, had been watching the group of soldiers’ training from another angle, sleep escaping him despite having only returned from an assignment, and he had grown perturbed when he had noticed Levina’s unmoving form for the past hour or so. Thus, there he was, after battling with himself to decide whether to leave the woman alone or to come up and attempt befriending her.
And befriend her, he will, for he had decided to do so.
“Say, Riven,” a questioning hum came from the girl, “if the British Army were to engage in a battle with twenty thousand emus, who do you think would win?”
A pause.
Levina turned away from her stare into the air to lock eyes with Gaz, only to be met with utter seriousness in his face. She stared wordlessly for a moment, uncertainty ringing in her head at the topic of conversation, before facing forward once again with a simple mutter of “emu” leaving her lips.
“What?!” Incredulous at her opinion, genuine disbelief crossed his expression. “Surely we’ve learnt from the Australia’s Emu War! There’s no way they’d win again.”
She gave a shrug. “Who’s to say they didn’t learn from the war too?”
Gaz prided himself in managing to get Levina to speak out an entire sentence, at the expense of learning of her opposing opinion in their – almost meaningless – debate.
“Okay, that’s fair, didn’t think that way. But they don’t even have hands!”
Another shrug, “fast legs.”
Cue their light-hearted discourse over the feasibility of winning over emus in a hypothetical war setting. Levina mostly responded with short quips, a shrug, or a hum, which didn’t discourage Gaz at all, remaining as patient as ever as he led the conversation. The topic somehow switched from emus to other animals, to the comparison of a gun against a sword as a more reliable weapon, to the flaws of human evolution that has led to the current state of the world.
Needless to say, they were quick to arrive at that stage of their friendship where the questions got too real and they began considering the likelihood of human extinction within the next couple of generations.
Levina appreciated the breath of fresh air that Gaz had brought with him. For so long now, her only person of correspondence was Agustine and Agustine alone, that meant that she had forgotten what it was like to chat nonsense with someone. Keeping up with the conversation also meant less room for her mind to fumble into the deep ends of hopelessness in her heart, and this could be the start of her healing process. With that thought in mind, she tried to lengthen her answers by offering more of her thoughts or even by asking questions. Judging by the encouraging smile Gaz sent her whenever she spoke up, he must have clocked onto her efforts.
It was odd to have someone listen to her. Playing Agustine’s bimbo had been a role where no one had paid any attention to her deliberately thoughtless words and only looked at her like she was some doll whose only asset was her looks. She had to keep repeating in her mind that those days of being used for her body were over, and that Gaz was being genuinely friendly out of the kindness of his heart – something she had last seen in the form of the granny who had taken her in, in that town she had stumbled upon.
Lunch time came eventually, as signalled by the trainer’s dismissal of the group of soldiers a good distance away. Unfortunately for Levina, the men had to pass by her bench on their way to the dining hall and she was subjected to leering eyes and low whistles that, unbeknownst to her, had started ever since they had first noticed her nearby presence. Only now did she realise that she was still dressed in the same clothes that Agustine had picked for her night; a dark blue nightdress with a low sweetheart neckline and a thin cardigan thrown over her shoulders, with the same stiletto heels – because Agustine didn’t understand practicality and had her wearing heels 24/7 – that she had stabbed him with. Chills ran down her bones at the sense of déjà vu as familiar irrational thoughts attacked her mind. She felt like a newbie again, seventeen and out of her depths among the masculinity that reeked all over the base.
“-Riven? You alright?”
“Hm?”
She quickly, with concerning ease, wiped away the insecurity in her eyes and put on the same reassuring smile she had sent Crawley. It seemed that the only times she let her face contort expressively were only when she had to fake her emotions; and she knew that Gaz had caught onto that, if his sceptical look was anything to go by.
Deciding to let her go, however, he didn’t bring that up and instead, pointed to the direction of the dining hall with his thumb. “You heading to lunch?”
She hesitated. Sure, she could do with more food, but she wasn’t keen on attracting more unwelcomed attention with her getup. Though, she really was hungry… Perhaps she’ll just channel her Tara Darwin identity again and strut there in all her confidence.
Her stomach growled at that moment and a decision was made for her. Fake it ‘til you make it, they said, and fake it ‘til she made it, she will.
Gaz grinned knowingly at her and stood up just as Levina did. They kept to silence as they headed to their destination and upon their entrance to the hall, she was hit with momentary panic at not having a place to sit. That was quickly abated, thankfully, when she spotted Crawley waving at her in invitation from his seat. She gestured to the line queueing for food and he gave an ‘okay’ sign of understanding.
“I’ll sit with a friend of mine. Thank you for the… water.”
A breath of laughter left Gaz and he turned to regard her with an amused glint in his eyes. “Of course, Riven. Can’t have you passing out from the heat now, can I?”
He had understood her connotation, that she had appreciated his company for the past few hours. He felt a sense of accomplishment at having made friends with the respectable woman and inwardly hoped for her to feel better as time would pass.
They parted ways once they had their tray of lunch in hand and Gaz beelined for his usual table where Captain Price – as she had learned during the debrief – was already present while Levina started towards where Crawley had saved a seat for her beside him. She ignored the distinct tap, tap of her heels against the wooden floor and the looks it garnered as she walked to her table. Her periphery vision showed a couple of men nudging their friends as their eyes left a heavy trail as they skimmed down her body. Suppressing her shiver of discomfort as she made the final steps, she forced her lips up into a cordial smile to the people in Crawley’s table – his current team, she surmised. Right in her guess, they each introduced themselves to her once she had sat down.
“Levina Riven. Crawley’s previous teammate, presumed dead for months.”
One of them then asked her what it was like to operate a long-con mission, which earned him a slap up the back of his head from Crawley. Gossips spread quick in the army, because what else could soldiers do other than train when bored?
Giving a lopsided smile, she answered, “besides the care pack you receive that consists of trauma?”
That got her a few laughter and they got the hint to stay off the unpleasant topic for the meantime. Crawley steered the conversation away and Levina only barely tuned in into their chatter as she ate, offering her thoughts only when they were asked for. It wasn’t like she hated the group of friends, she was just finding it hard to get a footing while dressed vulnerably amongst the uniformed men.
It’s not Agustine anymore, she repeated, you don’t have to fake it anymore.
The urge to reclaim Tara Darwin’s personality sat within reach of her grasp, so that she didn’t have to deal with her insecurity weighing on her mind – not insecurity over her body, but over the idea that her only notable trait was her body. Currently, with her lack of expressions and words, perhaps she really was nothing but a doll.
Ridding herself of that thought, she looked to the clock and finished up her meal quickly. She shot the table an apologetic smile when she was done and stood up as she reasoned her early leave with the excuse that she had to meet Laswell soon, never mind the fact that the Station Chief had stated she was free to come by her office whenever she was done with her lunch.
Once again, pulling up Tara Darwin’s confidence in her steps, Levina went to return her tray before exiting the stuffy room without catching anybody’s eyes. She slowed her steps down as she made her way to Laswell’s office, before stopping in her tracks in front of her door. Taking a deep breath, she brought one fist up to knock her knuckles against the door and stated her name and purpose as per Laswell’s request. Only once she was given permission did she enter the room with steady steps.
“Sergeant Riven, do sit down.” Levina settled on the seat across the desk in front of Laswell and kept her back straight as her superior began, “did you managed to think it through?”
“Yes, Ma’am.”
“Do share, Sergeant.”
An explicit order to voice out her opinions by a figure of authority? How she had missed the humane way the S.A.S. Army ran compared to Agustine’s organisation.
Levina didn’t let her hesitance linger around. “If it is no trouble, I would like for a few days of leave to rest and catch up with my father. After that, I am willing to return and retrain with the others or under any specific arrangement you propose to get back on my feet sooner rather than later.”
Laswell gave a nod of agreement. “No different from what I had in mind. Three weeks of leave, and these do not count towards the agreed yearly number of PTOs you have, and then you are to come back to undergo training under a supervisor – training with the fresh recruits will only slow you down. You will be wired your pay for the past seven months by the end of this week for the work you have done in accumulating valuable intel. Any more to add, Sergeant?”
A longer leave than she had thought she might receive, no PTOs deducted, and seven months of salary? Oh, how she had really missed this place. “None, Ma’am.”
“Good. I have skimmed through your intel on Agustine and commencement of extracting information from him will begin tonight. I request that you stay here for the night in case you are needed for it. Any questions?”
“None, Ma’am.”
Another nod from Laswell as she wrapped up their talk. “You will stay in room 104 in the barracks for the night and after your leave. I trust that you know where it is?”
Room 104 had been her previous room, for it was one of the two double bunk-beds room that housed the women in the station.
“Yes, Ma’am.”
“Alright.” Expecting to be dismissed, Levina was confused at Laswell’s pause. The Station Chief had a pinched expression on her face as she thought her words over. “Did none of my men offer you a change of clothes at all? Not even a single jacket?”
Surprised at the turn of conversation, her “none, Ma’am” had lost the strength to its tone and came out slightly quirked as a question.
Laswell sighed, disappointment clear in the shake of her head. “Men.”
Perhaps it was the sense of camaraderie that she felt they had as two women in a cluster of masculinity, but whatever it was, Levina had felt secured enough to let a sincere grimace take over her expression. “Men, indeed.” And perhaps it was that same understanding as a woman Laswell felt that made her not reprimand Levina for speaking without prompt.
Laswell dismissed her soon after that and she now found herself sat on her assigned bed after showering and changing into a spare grey tee and cargo pants she had found in the locker that had come with the sleeping arrangements. The other occupants of the room weren’t in at the moment so she had time alone to sort through her thoughts.
Except, as if her thoughts had decided to pull up on a strike against her mind, none stayed around long enough before her mind dozed off into thoughtlessness. Deciding that it must be her exhaustion catching up to her after a restless night, she decided to lay under her covers to get a moment of shuteye in, seeing as she had no duties to commit to that day.
However, what she had intended to be a nap ended up becoming an entire sleep in, and she only woke up hours later in the quiet of the night.
Glancing at the alarm clock, she had over an hour before it would ring through the barracks simultaneously with the other room’s. Her body felt well-rested though, and sleep wouldn’t take her back in despite her pleas and so she opted to start preparing for her day.
A quick shower later left her even more refreshed, though she only had the same outfit to change into, and she put on her complimentary pair of sneakers before heading out of the barracks. The sun had yet to grace her with its presence so she settled on roaming around under the guide of the moonlight, something she hadn’t realised she had missed until now – freedom. She had been too busy assuring herself of her identity and worth that she had forgotten she now held full autonomy over herself. Months of feigning total submission under Agustine had really taken a toll on her to that extent.
Agustine this, Agustine that. She yearned for the day that man won’t appear in her mind even once, not the tiniest sliver of him.
Her mindless walk under the cloudy sky ended up bringing her back to the bench she had taken up the morning prior and she sat at the same exact spot as she awaited dawn. It seemed that the bench was one that determined fateful meetings for her, for it wasn’t long before she found herself in a similar situation as yesterday with Gaz.
Eyes trained forward and ears ringing with memories of her months spent in hell, she had not anticipated a figure to make their presence known by sitting down beside her. The waft of espresso scent brought her back into reality and she glanced at the man beside her.
Because mum and dad had not raised an unrespectful lady, she straightened up and greeted her superior with a quiet but steady voice. “Captain Price.”
“At ease, Sergeant.”
From what she had gathered from his interactions that she had seen until now – and the gossip that Crawley had filled her in on previously – Price was not a stuck-up captain who bullied their subordinates. That as a consideration, she relaxed her shoulders and back only after a moment of hesitation and brought her hands onto her lap to fiddle with her fingers subconsciously.
“Laswell wants to see you after breakfast, in her office.”
“Understood, Captain.”
Her reply was immediate and had cut through the thick air in between them with precision. Upon learning of his intention at approaching her, she eased up further, though, confused when he remained by her side even at the first glimpse of orange in the horizon.
Entranced by the view she had not witnessed in a long while, for Agustine had always kept her in his arms until he woke up hours past dawn, she spared the man beside her no thoughts and kept her gaze locked onto the palettes of shades that the sun created against the blue sky. Distantly, she hoped against all odds that she could one day rise over the constant haunting of Agustine as the sun had peaked over the skyline. A slow process, perhaps, but she would eventually get there.
Moments after the sun had made its full appearance in all its glory, the pair heard multiple alarms go off at intervals of seconds from the barracks, signalling them of the time and availability of breakfast in the dining hall.
“And that’s my cue.”
Price got up, careful so as to not spill over his cup of strong-smelling coffee, and offered her a resolute nod of greeting. As if he knew the plagues of her mind, he continued, “you’ve fought well against him thus far. He can’t break you now, more than ever. Not anymore.”
Without giving her a chance to respond, not that she had any idea what to say, he left her staring after his back as he walked away. Mulling over his words, she silently thanked him for his acknowledgement that, indeed, the past seven months had been a fight. Her fight for justice for all the trafficked victims of Agustine’s operations, and for her sister and mother who she had to mourn over when she had only been twelve. A fight that had yet to cease now, and a fight that she would emerge victorious one day. However muted it was, action-wise, it had been a fight; she hadn’t thought of it that way.
She stayed outside for a little while longer before making her way back in to the hall to grab breakfast. Price was absent from the table she had seen him and Gaz took yesterday, but there was someone else already there amongst the few people who was early to breakfast. He sported no skull mask which meant that, by the process of elimination as she went through the mental list of Task Force 141’s names that Crawley had shared with her, the person was Soap.
She took her eyes off of him before anyone had even noticed her stare and minded her business as she got herself another sandwich for the morning. Choosing to eat her meal on the same table Crawley had invited her to previously instead of bringing it outside or to her room – or, Grace forbids, the bathroom like some high school loser in the movies – she took slow bites as her mind wandered off to theorise what Laswell needed her for later on. It was likely to do with Agustine, as Laswell had shared her purpose for staying the night in the barracks was for that, and she only hoped that she didn’t have to meet her tormentor again.
Much to her dismay, her hopes went unanswered as, moments later, she found herself walking alongside Laswell towards Agustine’s cell. Apparently, the man had kept silent all throughout his questioning, and he had asked after her one too many times for it not to be a silent request to see his former lover once again. Honest to Grace, Levina wasn’t sure why they still needed Agustine alive with the intel that she had provided, but she supposed a confirmation of her perspective was preferable to the Army. Though, she doubted that Agustine would really sell out his organisation that easily. She had lived with him for months, for fuck’s sake, she had taken the brunt of his angers and had listened to his darkest confessions with attentive ears. She knew better than anyone just how much he prided himself in having built his organisation from the ground up ever since his youths when he was still a part of a Mafia group – he had done it under wraps and had massacred the high-ranks of that Mafia once he was powerful enough, thus dismantling that one Mafia group but creating a human-trafficking organisation in its stead.
When one realised just how formidable Agustine was as an enemy, it really was almost incomprehensible and laughable how Levina had managed to wriggle her way into his ranks with a bat of her eyelash and a sway of her hips. Her impulsive disguise as a bimbo really might just spell the end of Agustine’s reign, she realised belatedly. Oh, the flaws of stupid men who think with their cocks.
As the pair of women neared their destination, Levina tried reasoning with her mind that this could be the final time she had to come face to face with Agustine. A closure, if she would. She wasn’t sure what went through the higher-up’s mind to decide that her presence might coax him into exposing his organisation but she’d amuse them for now. If her visit ended up producing no results, that was no fault of her own.
The guards let them into the station’s prison and they entered a room to see Agustine handcuffed to the table of the questioning cell on the opposite side of the one-way mirror. A few other associates were there to greet their arrival and judging by their expressions, they still had not made any progress with getting Agustine to speak.
“The only topic he would skirt around was you, Sergeant Riven. Won’t stop expressing his anger at ‘Tara’, which Price had explained was your alias.”
The more Agustine stayed within her vision, the more uncertain Levina was of her role. “Why would my presence affect his resolve to stay silent?”
“We are holding onto any possible thread at this point. You might be the key, you might not be; there is only one way to find out, Sergeant.”
“Right…”
“Ready when you are,” they had said. She swallowed her words that had wanted to shoot back that she would never be ready, not in the near future at least, along with her nerves as she willed her soul, body, and mind to remain strong in his presence. With a final deep breath, she turned the doorknob to the holding cell and entered with a blank face.
“Ah, Tara, darling. At last, you’ve shown yourself!”
His familiar condescending tone scratched at her brain harshly. “What do you want.”
A mocking grin made its way to his lips as he languidly leaned back in his chair. “Not even a “hello, how are you, Claude?” or an apology for betraying my trust? My love?”
Disgust crawled under her skin at the reminder of his rather physical show of love and of the idea that she had spent uncountable nights under his ogling and wandering hands. Not wanting to show just how much Agustine affected her, she forced herself to take a seat across him.
“I’ll consider it if you start talking.”
His eyes flashed with anger and she applauded herself for not flinching.
“About what, sweetheart? About the tricks and the lengths you’ve gone through to bewitch me? You want me to confess my love for you that you have trampled on without so much as a care? How about describing all the shameless things you’ve done in bed just to keep me satisfied? Hmm?”
Tara Darwin may have shed her sense of embarrassment for a while now, but Levina Riven had not. The two identities battled each other to shoot back her response and the winner was clear when her eyebrow sarcastically went up in feigned confidence. “What, do you want me to strip down to my socks and masturbate in front of them while we’re at it?”
The bimbo-ness of Tara Darwin’s personality in her may have been absent but holy Mother, she had not expected her candidness. Evidence of her time spent around the crass language that Agustine’s men had used, perhaps.
Annoyed at Levina’s avoidance of his bait, he dropped that tactic. “You know I won’t say shit to you guys. You’re just wasting time here.”
Grappling to grab a hold of Levina Riven’s identity, she schooled her expression once more. “Do you want me to put you out of your misery, then? If we have no use of you, I’m not against disposing you.”
Agustine let out a bark of laughter. “And then what? My people will continue even without me, you can’t do anything about that.”
So, the others have kept silence over Levina’s gathered intel on him… She wasn’t trained to question suspects so she had no idea what strategy that was but she would respect it. Knowing that this was going nowhere, she rolled her neck side to side to ease the joints, creating a series of cracks that echoed in the room. “Right, well. If you won’t speak then I’m done here, really.”
She stood up and an idea struck her on how she could begin closing this chapter in her life. Leaning over the table, she brought one hand up to take his chin and lift his face up towards her. With a single word, she cleared the apprehension in his face and his eyes stared back lifelessly as he was subjected to the memories of his past trauma that the word had brought up.
“Marcire.”
The rest of the team, which had expanded with the addition of Captain Price and Gaz, looked at her with varying degrees of oddness etched onto their features when she emerged from the holding cell. She looked questioningly at them and glanced at Agustine’s shell-shocked state when Laswell pointed towards him. “What did you say to him at the end?”
“Marcire; Italian for ‘rot’. He associates that word with a couple of past traumas from his time in the Mafia.” It was probably a really low, bitch move on her part to pull up his trauma, but he is a human-trafficker. He had been served at a level that he himself served.
“Just how much did he confide in you…”
Levina gave a noncommittal shrug. “I did find a wedding ring in his drawer one day. I was spending 24 hours a day by his side then, so there could have been no one else he was seeing.”
Her confession brought surprise to the room as each of them realised that they had underestimated just how flawlessly Levina had single-handedly tricked Agustine. Acting hadn’t even been one of the skills listed in her file – that needed updating, quick.
Another one of her associates cleared his throat. “Right. We’ll try questioning him again once he’s snapped out of his… current state. Thank you for your time, Sergeant Riven.”
“Of course, sir.”
Laswell then turned to address her and she stiffened her back and shoulders slightly. “I have approved your leave for the next three weeks. You are free to leave any time after noon today.”
“Thank you, Ma’am.”
Upon having nothing more to add from either side of the party, Laswell then dismissed her and she left the prison with Gaz following after her. It was only after they made it outside that Gaz struck up a conversation with her.
“Heard you were leaving today and wanted to catch you before that. I only realised earlier that I haven’t gotten your number and that was unacceptable!”
Levina didn’t stop in her tracks as she aimlessly walked around the HQ once again, but it was a near thing. “I don’t know where they kept my phone.” At Gaz’s confusion, she clarified, “from back when I was first presumed dead. I tend not to bring it with me during missions.”
In agreement that her then-captain would likely be the person who would know the whereabouts of her personal cell, they decided to head up to Mavers’ office. There, they found him alone and busy with paperwork but he, nevertheless, invited them in. As it turns out, the Captain had sent all of Levina’s personal belongings back home, to her father, as per the guidelines, so, high possibility she’d find the device amongst them there. With a grateful nod to him, the pair left the office just as quickly as they had entered and recommenced their walk around the vicinity; not before Gaz had asked to borrow a slip of paper and a pen, though.
“There. So that you can text me whenever you’ve found your phone.”
She pocketed the paper with Gaz’s phone number written on it with a touch of appreciation. Prior to Gaz, her only friends had been her team and her roommates in Room 104, and so far, that entire team had been wiped out, save for Crawley, and she had yet to reconcile with the ladies as she had been dead-asleep when they had returned to the barracks the evening before.
A fresh chapter in her life, indeed.
Words escaped her when she tried to voice out her gratitude to him. No matter, there was still a lifetime ahead of her – however short it may be due to her line of work – to express herself.
The weather was cooler than it had been yesterday and there were no hints of grey clouds in sight. Deciding that it was a good day to bask in the sun, they ended up sitting on the same bench from the day before – and that morning, for her. As Levina was to leave and return to civilian life in a few hours, they ended up talking about the pre-military life that seemed so far away now; from childhood dreams to subjects they had enjoyed in school, even insignificant crushes in elementary because, who hasn’t had them?
Gaz was sharing an anecdote of the time he had pissed his pants due to stage fright when they were interrupted by the approach of another man. They spotted Soap closing his distance to the pair with purposeful strides and Levina didn’t miss the way Gaz lit up in understanding.
“He probably needs me for something- we’ll have to cut our time short, unfortunately.”
He gave her a frown and she was saved from having to respond when Soap arrived in front of them. The newcomer extended a hand to Levina as he introduced himself. “Sergeant Johnny MacTavish, better known as ‘Soap’. Gaz’s teammate and the best-looking lad in the station.”
She felt rude, meeting his cheeky and playful grin with a blank expression, so she strained an upward curl of her lips into a harmless smile. Hoping that her moment of hesitation to take his hand went unnoticed, she stated her name and rank in exchange.
His brightness unwavering even at her muted response, his grin remained in place as he snapped his hand onto his waist, casting his extended shadow onto the pair sat on the bench.
“I see that Gaz was quicker than me! Would like to say that I’m a big fan of yours; shame, what he did to your heels, but that was a badass move if I’ve ever seen one.”
“Oh.” Levina blinked in pleasant surprise, “thank you?”
It was a calculated but rash decision, to stab Agustine’s thigh with her pointed heels. She had no weapons on her back then, when she had realised that he was planning to catch her off-guard, and he would, no doubt, overpower her with sheer strength if she had not used everything she had to her advantage. She hadn’t even been sure if the stiletto would be sharp enough to cut into his flesh but surprised, she was, when it did without so much of an obstruction. And that action had given her a fan… the Grace up above could not tell her if that was a good thing or not.
“Anyways, I’d love to chat more with you but alas, duty has called for me and my mate, here.” Gaz stood up with a sigh and Soap wasted no time in throwing an arm around his shoulder. “I’ll see you around, yeah? Don’t be a stranger.”
Gaz offered her a smile. “Text me when you’re free, a’ight? Enjoy your well-deserved leave and stay safe, Riven.”
“Will do.”
The pair of men left her with a lasting grin and Levina let her eyes linger after them as they got further away. A sigh escaped her at her lonely circumstance and she opted to remain in her seat for a while longer. Her clothes blended in amongst her colleagues so she felt better in her skin compared to when she had been in a nightdress. Thus, she didn’t mind her current spot near the soldiers undergoing outdoor training.
It was a mindset she had trained to achieve, and so did every woman in the field, to find her place within the dense fog of masculinity and testosterone, and to hold it strong against the judgmental looks and condescending tones sent her way. That feminine force in her had weakened over the months as Tara Darwin’s submissiveness to men vigorously fought against her true psyche, but she knew it was still within her – she just had to patch herself back up.
When it was a few minutes to noon, she headed back to her room to double-check if she had left anything behind – never mind the fact that she had arrived empty handed. She felt silly, debating over whether she wanted to keep the white pair of Louboutin heels gifted by Agustine, for it was, after all, so bloody expensive (pardon the pun) and worth it to put in the effort to clean off the blood. Quick in her decision, however, she decided against it to save herself the headache of having a parting gift from the despicable man; the mental lasting touches of his were enough of a burden, she didn’t need physical ones too.
Disposing Agustine’s money’s worth of outfit, she washed her hands clean of the unseen contamination afterwards, scrubbing the soap harshly against her skin like she did her entire body in her first shower back here.
In a spur of the moment – her decision-making skills really were as impulsive as they come, she realised – she decided to leave after having her lunch here so that she didn’t have to stop by somewhere on her way back home. She met Gaz’s and Soap’s waves with a nod, giving another one to Price when he had turned to see who the pair was greeting in curiosity, and took her tray to Crawley’s table once again. With an almost-minute friendly smile plastered onto her lips, she greeted the occupants of the table and settled into silence as she ate her meal, speaking up only when prompted. She finished up in no time, more than eager to see her father again, and set her destination to home as she walked out of the compounds.
The Army had issued her a temporary spare card to take the public transport back home seeing as: one, her personal card was sent home following her ‘death’; and two, her car was also sent home and was, more than likely, sold by her father as he had no use of it – as he got older, he decided not to risk driving with a flawed eyesight and opted to take the public transport instead.
It was a two-hours ride back home and she had only her mind to keep her company. Two hours of boredom felt almost quick in comparison to seven months of hell though, and before long, she found herself standing in the doorway of the humble flat she had made into a home with her dad – the initial house for her entire family had been too big – too painful – to maintain.
Levina felt her heart beat out of her chest and shook her hands to get rid of some nerves. With a shaking hand, she pressed the button for her apartment number on the intercom and waited for a response. It was a Saturday which meant that her dad wouldn’t be out for work, and Laswell had mentioned previously that they would give him a heads up regarding her not-dead state of wellbeing. Only two seconds had passed when she heard the audio crackle over the speaker and then a voice calling out.
“Vina?”
She felt tears prick her eyes at the familiar cadence she had missed dearly and her voice came out shaky when she responded, “dad?”
“Bless my heart- it’s you!”
The door to the building buzzed open and she wasted no time in tracing her steps to the elevator. She wrung her hands to settle the urge to spam the elevator door close and tapped her foot as she was brought higher and higher into the building. She sped her way to the right unit and anxiously knocked on the door the moment it was within reach. The door swung open and she only got a glimpse of her dad’s face before she was brought into a tight hug.
“Oh Vina, you’ve come home! You’re alive! You’re alive-”
He cut himself off with a sob that wracked through his entire body and she was immediately crying with him, didn’t even bother holding her tears back.
“Dad-” Levina sobbed as she tightened her hold around her dad, “I’m sorry- I’m so sorry-”
“Not your fault, darling,” she felt him shake his head, their hairs ruffling against each other, “not at all…” And oh, how she had missed the soothing affection that came with being called terms of endearments.
He pulled back and kept Levina near with a grasp on her shoulders, then brought a hand up to gently brush away the hairs that had stuck onto her face. “Let me look at you- oh, sweetheart… you’ve gotten even more lovely since!”
In the comfort of her father, she felt her mind ease enough that expressing herself didn’t feel like a chore.
Fondness pulled the corner of her trembling lips upwards as she let out another sob. “I’m home, dad- I’m home.”
They eventually made their way inside the unit and locked the door behind them. Settling on the couch, their hands remained clasped as they tried to make up for the seven months that had forced them apart.
Her wellbeing always a priority in his heart, his eyes shone with worry as he asked, “have you eaten? I can whip out something quick if you need. Was there anything in particular that you’ve missed eating? Mom’s special carbonara? Roast chicken? Or-”
“Slow down, dad! I’m alright!” A watery laugh escaped her, “I had lunch before I left the compounds so I’m good.”
Placated slightly, her dad quietened down as he raked his eyes over her face, taking in the features he had missed. She did the same, trailing her eyes as she matched their similar features in his nose and eyes. Her lips mirrored her mom’s but her sister had gotten dad’s. Speaking of…
Levina felt another round of tears threaten to slip out but managed to reign it in for the sake of not worrying her dad. Laswell had specified the need to keep Agustine’s records confidential within the military for the meantime so Levina didn’t have the greenlight to let her dad know of his youngest daughter’s fate. She silently strengthened her promise to do everything she could to bring her sister back if she was still alive.
The reunited pair of family ended up talking the afternoon away as they caught each other up on their lives. Levina had confided in him, tears streaming down her face, of her fear of losing her identity and of her grief over her mental exhaustion at expressing herself. He held her in his arms and she felt like a child all over again, with the way he caressed her hair as he listened attentively to her worries.
“Oh, Vina. Despite everything, you are still you. My daughter whom I cherish so much, the girl who gave the ‘monster under the bed’ a teddy because she hadn’t wanted it to be lonely, the woman you have grown to be whose parents are so, so proud of.”
That had rightfully earned him another wave of cries from Levina.
“We’ll take it one step at a time, yeah? No need to rush, there’s all the time in the world to give you the space you need to heal. And don’t you think for one second that you’re alone in all of this, I’m here for you whenever you need me, love.”
Always so patient, her dad was. She did, after all, inherit that trait from somewhere – and how validated she felt when she acknowledged that no, her only trait wasn’t her pretty looks, there was much more to her than that.
They ended up ordering in for dinner, their crying session having seeped away their energy. After a shower, she didn’t stay up long before turning in for the night, her dad following not too far behind. He had kept her room clean despite her months of absence and she found the belongings that the Army had sent home all packed in an unopened box.
She rummaged through it in search for her phone and its charger, then plugged it up to let it charge overnight as she slept. Exhaustion pulled her into sleep quickly and left her dreamless that night. The sun was only beginning to peak over the skyline when she woke up and her room lit up in the faintest of light. The cool tile under her feet grounding her, she headed to the kitchen to prepare a cup of black tea for herself and her dad, knowing that her family was full of early birds and that he’ll be seeking his own shot of pick-me-up in a moment. True to their persisting routine, her dad shuffled out of his room not long after and beelined for his own cup after giving her an affectionate hug.
A comforting silence blanketed over them in the chilly autumn air. Levina scooted closer to her dad when he sat beside her on the couch and leaned her head against his shoulder, his arm coming up to keep her close. They spent the early morning gazing out the big living room window that looked over the other buildings, as they simply basked in each other’s missed presence.
As if no time had been lost between them, they settled into their previous patterns whenever Levina would stay over in between deployments. Except, the solemn air fleeting past them told of the hardship that they have suffered from to get to this dear moment in time.
The reminders of love that she received from her dad were able to wipe away some associations of love that she had with Agustine. Her dad’s companionship over the days had also helped her fully accept the fact that she was now out of reach from Agustine. He could no longer worsen her state and ruin things for her any further; or in Price’s words, he couldn’t break her now. That realisation gradually, bit by bit, eased the weariness that had locked up her expressions. There was no more Agustine, hence, no longer a need to keep her psyche fortified against the fear of being unloved. Trips to the movies, restaurants, and shops with her dad were opportunities to test out her expressiveness and by the end of her third week, she could at least manage genuine grateful smiles to strangers. Her confidence in her ability to heal took its time to rise but rise, it did.
The day she had to return to her duties had been a teary day but both of them had strengthened their resolve to not cry because they will meet again, as they have always promised. She decided against purchasing a car and opted to take the public transport instead as she didn’t tend to venture elsewhere besides the compound and her home. Levina was to arrive at her compound by noon so, with the two hours ride to consider, she left early in the morning after bidding her father farewell.
When she made it to the compound, it was a while before lunch time would start so there were soldiers roaming around the station. With foresight, she was dressed in the same grey tee and cargo pants that blended into the surroundings so she didn’t capture a significant amount of attention as she headed to the barracks. Once she had deposited her belongings, she walked straight to Laswell’s office to report her presence. Upon Laswell’s permission, she walked in, feeling more herself than the last time she had been here.
“Sergeant Riven. It’s good to see you well.”
Laswell launched into business immediately, sharing that Agustine was now in the custody of the state prison after the never-ending failures to pry information out of the man. The next assignment to tackle one of his bases of operations would happen in the coming weeks in hopes of attacking his men in the middle of their chaos of their missing ringleader. If that assignment went well, they would be looking at finally having the complete records in the organisation’s system.
“We now have options to discuss in terms of locations and who to watch out for during these missions all thanks to you, Sergeant. Your efforts are greatly appreciated.”
They then talked about Levina’s current position in the station; Lieutenant Mitch Mordell had been tasked with supervising her training and she was to obey his direction in the meantime. Officially, Levina had not been appointed a team to work with but Mordell had promised good progress within two months so her file would be updated then for the team captains to consider her as an asset. Training would start the next day, but Mordell had requested to pass along his message asking Levina to meet with him after lunch that day.
“Any more to add, Sergeant?”
“None, Ma’am.”
“Dismissed. Welcome back, Sergeant.”
Now with minutes to spare before lunch time opens, Levina decided she might as well wait in the dining hall which, upon entering it, it seemed that a few others had decided to do the same. She spotted Gaz and Soap chatting at their table just as Soap looked up reflexively upon her entrance.
“Riven!”
Now that had attracted the room’s attention.
Her hand paused in the air mid-wave and she blinked in series, caught off-guard by the loudness of Soap’s voice. Pointedly ignoring the others in the room, she walked over to the pair with the intention to say hi. They were friends after all – Gaz and her had corresponded over texts and, a week into it, he had passed along Soap’s request to have her number. They were pleasant people to talk with, she had decided, and they didn’t judge her preference of using emoticons over emojis.
Once she was stood at the head of the table, Gaz on her left and Soap on her right, the former made a sound of wonder as his eyes darted to run their gaze over her hair.
“New hairstyle? It suits you, Riv.”
“Hell yeah, you look good with it!”
As per the cardinal rule to a lady’s guide on how to get over a breakup – though, it wasn’t exactly the ‘breakup’ part that she was trying to get over – Levina had gone to the salon to get her hair cut. Inexperienced with hairstyles for she had always stuck to a simple long style that she could braid for practical purposes, she simply allowed the hairstylist to find the best fit for her. Thus, she ended up with a slightly-past shoulder-length wolf cut and a perm to keep the curls consistent – seeing as she wouldn’t be able to style it manually every morning – that she could still gather into a braid if needed. Needless to say, the mirror gave her a boost of self-confidence and she was happy with her new something that made up her identity as Levina Riven.
“Thanks, guys.” Here, she could manage the slight smile to her lips to convey her gratitude. That seemed to brighten Gaz up and he could see that she had been truthful in her responses of ‘doing great’ wellbeing whenever he had asked her over text. “Just thought I might switch it up for a change. Giving credit where credit’s due, the hairstylists did a great job.”
“Well, credit where credit’s due, I think you did a great job pulling it off.” Soap gave his classic cheeky grin. “And also, in sitting still long enough because- let me tell you, my ass cannot do that.”
A breath of amusement left her in an exhale that didn’t go unnoticed by the pair, much to their delight at having tugged on her sense of humour.
“Anyways, why’re you still standing?! Here- sit, sit.”
“Oh.” Levina eyed the empty spot that Gaz had scooted further along the bench to create. Uncertainty washed over her and she glanced at the clock, then Crawley’s empty table, before deciding to take the boys up on their offer. “Well, if you don’t mind…”
“Not at all,” Gaz waved away her concerns with ease.
“So, how have you both been?”
At Levina’s question, they took turns sharing snippets of interesting stories that they had not shared previously. They ranged from the latest gossip in the compound, to their personal accounts of the different ways they got their ass beaten by each other during hand-to-hand combat training.
By the end of it all, the hall had already opened for lunch. Levina stood up to join the two in grabbing her own share of food but she paused when Soap narrowed his eyes at her. She subconsciously tilted her head in question.
“You’ll come back here once you grab your food, won’t you? You haven’t told us how you’ve been!”
Turning to Gaz for help had been useless because she caught him nodding earnestly instead, in complete agreement with Soap. “Can’t just leave us hanging like that.”
Her lips parted in genuine surprise. “I’ve got someone wai-” but her words got lodged in her throat when she realised that Crawley hadn’t even shown up yet. A different approach then. “I wouldn’t want to intrude the others you normally sit with.”
At that moment, Soap seemed to have spotted something – or rather, someone – behind Levina and he brightly cheered out, “you wouldn’t be! Isn’t that right, Cap?”
Price rounded the table from where he had appeared from behind Levina to take his seat on the free space beside Soap, diagonally across her. An eyebrow quirked up at the scene in front of him, his eyes lingered slightly on Levina’s instinctively stiffened figure before addressing the men. “At ease, Sergeant Riven. And why are you all stood in place like a pack of flamingos?”
Soap preoccupied with feigning mock offense at Price’s comment, Gaz explained in his stead. “Say, Cap, you wouldn’t mind if we invite Riven here to our table for lunch, would you?”
“What is this, elementary school?” Price turned to her once again. “Sit wherever you want, Sergeant. Though, keep in mind, the boys hold grudges.”
“Right…” Bewildered at the situation, she hadn’t even noticed that her eyes had opened slightly wider.
“Great! You stay here, Riven, and I’ll go grab you a tray.”
Nope, she decided, that was too much for her to handle.
The boys had immediately left the table after Soap had stated his offer and she quickly exited the bench to catch up after them. “I can do that myself, thank you very much!”
It spoke volumes just how needed her leave was to heal herself with the way she was able to exclaim and hold her voice steady when just three weeks ago, she could only manage low mutters and a stoic face when she didn’t have to answer to a figure of authority. Besides her dad, she had Gaz and Soap to thank for to have made this much progress; and perhaps even Price for his brief words of encouragement that had acknowledged her strength and perseverance.
“I’m glad you have good people with you there,” her dad had said when she told him of the new people she had met, “you don’t have to be alone to heal from your wounds.”
Lunch, overall, had been an enjoyable affair. She got to speak of her outings with her dad and, though she had not voiced it out, the others knew that the most significant part of her three-weeks leave had been the steady growth she’s made in healing herself.
Time passed by in a blur and they soon had to part ways. She headed straight for Lieutenant Mordell’s office and knocked on the door upon her arrival.
“Name and purpose!”
“Sergeant Riven! You asked to see me, Sir!”
He announced for her to enter and she did so with a bated breath.
She took her respectful stance across his desk in front of him and noticed the way the burly man stood taller than her and had a stony expression on his face. He hummed in thought for a moment as he took her figure in methodically, then nodded to himself as if she had somehow already passed his first test.
“Sergeant Riven!” His voice boomed slightly in the compact room and she didn’t allow herself to waver even the slightest.
“Yes, Sir!”
Pleased with her effort in matching his tone, he eased down his volume. “As Laswell has likely told you, I will be in charge of your personal training until you’ve gotten back on your feet. I’ve given my word that two months will be enough time to manage that and I do not go back on my words, do you understand?”
“Understood, Sir.”
“I’ve read your file and have heard good things about you from Captain Mavers, Sergeant, I suggest you live up to your potential and make us proud, you hear me?”
“Yes, Sir.”
He gave another nod and then took his seat behind his desk. “Sit down, Sergeant. I’ll run you through the strategies I’ve planned.”
Intensive training, he had called it, and she could see why. Her muscles almost ached at the thought of all the physical exertion she’d have to undergo for the next two months and she already dreaded the weeks when she’d be on her period. She couldn’t complain though, it was for her benefit after all. He gave her a copy so that she wouldn’t go into everyday blindly and for that, she thanked him. All in all, Lieutenant Mordell was a stern but not an unreasonable man, suitable to be the one to push her to her limits for the coming months. She just hoped he’ll do so kindly.
That night, she was able to reconnect with her roommates. There wasn’t much that had happened over the past eight months that she could share freely with the girls so she spent most of their chatter actively listening to the others talk, quipping on occasions.
With how good her day had gone, it seemed that the world had wanted to rectify the balance because she found herself waking up groggy the next morning as memories of her time as Agustine’s woman had plagued her all night. For what felt like an entire minute, she then stood under the flow of steaming water as if she could wash away the lingering feel of his touches that continued to haunt her. Nightmares weren’t uncommon to her; years of serving in the army had inevitably compiled tons of horrific materials for her brain to choose from to suffice as great content to reminisce during her sleep. Though, Agustine would undoubtedly reign supreme as the ‘content of the year’ that would show up to fight against the peaceful moonlight in her mind, much to her dismay.
Her schedule would start at a much more appropriate time in the morning so she was free to do anything until then. Not one to break habits, she settled onto the fateful bench and stared forward into the empty sky, awaiting the first glimmer of sunlight. Also a creature of mornings, it seemed, Price had joined her moments later with his steaming cup of coffee in his hands.
He had spotted her fixing her posture when she had first caught sight of him and, before she could even greet him in respect, he had knowingly huffed out an “at ease, Sergeant”, voice rough from unuse but warm against the chilly air.
They settled into companionable silence as the sun began to rise. When her thoughts of Agustine had crescendo-ed into fortissimo, she began to unknowingly scratch at her inner wrist where he had, more often than not, held her down against the bed as he played her body in tune with his sick fantasies. Her mind had been replaying her pain and distress when it abruptly went static when her ears had picked up on a sound in the real world.
She turned towards the source of her well-timed rescue and the blue taking over her sight grounded her more than the sky had ever done in the past three weeks – which said a lot seeing as the sky had provided sanctuary for her when the nights had been particularly bad. Unlike the clear blue that submissively made way for the sun to take its place, this new blue had stormy greys woven into it to emphasise the strength behind it. Blue had always been her favourite colour, but it was only now that she had decided on a favourite shade.
Blinking slowly as she regained her bearings, the specks of concern in Price’s eyes grew with every second that passed in silence. She rewound the past minute in her head and relistened closely to the sound that had brought her back to reality.
“Oh.”
Price had called out to her and she had unintentionally responded with an intense staring contest. Way to go, Lev, she grimaced inwardly, such a perfectly functional human being you are.
“Sorry, Captain- head in the clouds.”
Searching her eyes and finding none of the toxic haze that had been prominent in them prior to her snapping out of her daze, he passed off his sigh of relief as an exhale and glanced up. “It’s a clear sky this morning, Sergeant.” Her lips quirked up and he found himself mirroring it.
Taking his words for it – she had no idea where that sense of trust came from – her eyes never casted themselves upwards even as she responded assuredly, “so it is, Captain.”
The cacophony of alarm clocks ringing started at that moment and she turned back to face forwards at his previously-proclaimed ‘cue’ to leave. It seemed that she was right when he stood up, but she faced him again when he addressed her.
“You drink coffee, Sergeant?”
She had a speculation as to where this was going and found herself willingly playing along to his proposition. “More of a tea person, Captain.”
“Black?”
“And no sugar.”
He had unquestionably been caught but he didn’t let that faze him the slightest. “I’ll make a note of that, Sergeant.”
“Thank you, Captain.”
Her gratitude had escaped her in a low voice but he easily picked up on it anyway. With a final nod to her, he left her bubble of safety without popping it in his stride.
A thoughtful man, Price was. His calm patience at letting her return to her senses in her own time was an admirable attribute of his and she had felt respected upon being subjected to it earlier. She was uncertain as to why his eyes had become the most impactful grounding material for her thus far and she didn’t even know if she wanted to further investigate the matter – not that she would know how to do that in the first place. For singlehandedly pulling her out of the depths of her mind’s torment, she appreciated him. And if her hypothesis regarding the reasoning behind his question on how she preferred her drink was right, he must’ve at least also liked her company enough. She felt a comforting fuzziness in her chest and quickly waved it away.
She wasn’t born yesterday; she recognised the kindling flame in her heart. Fear prevented her from tending to it though, but hope bared its fangs and warded off any attempts in extinguishing it. So, she’ll sit back at watch it nurture on its own for now.
Not wanting to risk being late for her schedule, she only stayed outside for a moment longer before heading back in for breakfast. Always a person who got easily anxious about being late, she ended up in the gym early. Mordell arrived while she was in the midst of stretching and she swiftly stood up straight to salute her lieutenant.
Cue the commencement of her intensive training.
Mordell’s curated plans had not allowed for an easy beginning, immediately kicking off into pushing Levina past her ‘pathetic limits’, as he had dubbed. She had visited the local gym during her leave and had, too, been appalled at her maximum capability – it had dropped so low that it was almost as if it was her first day in cadet training. She could only imagine the pinched expression Mordell would have if he knew about that.
Getting her stamina back up was her priority in the past three weeks, and she applauded herself for that decision because it proved beneficial when Mordell gave her only small windows of breaks throughout the day. Her lunchtime now had a time limit and she could only stuff her face of her meal ceaselessly, much to the bemusement of Crawley and his team.
She didn’t hold back from putting in all her efforts which resulted in the lack of beratement from Mordell at the end of the day. There was no escaping his harsh words entirely though, and all she could do, other than try harder, was to fortify her mind against the – almost – degradation. Mordell was at least a more respectful person than the trainer during her cadet training; those times were bad enough that they had shown up as nightmares a handful of times even years later.
Finally, the final half an hour of dinner had come, which signalled the end of the day’s schedule. Her arms were limp by her side, sore from overexertion, as she trekked her way to the canteen. She tended to be amongst the early-comers of mealtimes and had expected less people towards the end of them, thus, rendering her slightly surprised when she entered the canteen only to see that it was rather packed.
As if he had been waiting for her arrival, Gaz was already waving to catch her attention when she walked into the hall. Upon meeting her eyes, he patted the empty seat next to her and she was about to give a nod when her eyes fell upon the rest of the table’s occupants who had reflexively turned towards her at Gaz’s actions.
Oh, she realised, the whole gang was here.
Lieutenant Simon “Ghost” Riley was an easily distinguishable person; built tall and broad, with the unmistakeable face covering in the form of an iconic skull mask on-field or a balaclava off-field. The lower half of his face covered, Levina couldn’t get a read of his expression at Gaz’s invitation to her.
Sporting a lopsided smile that was half genuine, she gestured to the empty queue for food which Gaz understood. She wasn’t sure how her presence would be taken by the lieutenant but seeing as he had remained in place even as she approached with her tray in hand, she surmised that he at least didn’t already dislike her.
A round of greetings came from the three men she was already familiar with when she reached the table, countering with her own “hey, guys”. Whatever had happened that morning with Price, it established a strong enough connection between the two that he didn’t even bat an eyelash when she didn’t immediately salute him; if anything, he seemed pleased at the lack of her gesture of respect.
Her eyes naturally landed on the only person she had not greeted and she offered him a warm smile. “Sergeant Levina Riven. Under the direct orders of Lieutenant Mordell.”
“Lieutenant Ghost. Task Force 141.”
Despite being obstructed, his voice was as sharp as the greeting nod he gave.
Having cleared the introductions, she took her seat next to Gaz and noticed that the area of the table in front of both Price and Ghost were clean, while Gaz and Soap had an empty tray. She couldn’t help but wonder if they usually stayed for dinner even after they had finished their meals or if they had done so this time because of her…
“Told you she wouldn’t run.” Pride was clear in Soap’s tone as he addressed Ghost, who gave a gruff of acknowledgment in response.
Just like that, dots connect in her head and she regarded Soap with an eyebrow raised, lips curled into a sliver of an amused smile. “You taking bets on me now? That’s hurtful, Soap.”
The aforementioned man stammered a defence, taken aback by her accurate judgement and the rare expressiveness to her words. Perhaps his playfulness had infected her.
Gaz shook his head in mock disappointment at the way his friend had easily exposed them. “Dumbass.”
Just before she started digging into her food, she added, “and for the record, why would I?”
She missed the glint of approval that flickered in the men’s eyes, though, she caught only a glimpse of a pleased smile on them before she looked to Ghost who had spoken up.
“These men like you too much so I thought I’d see for myself why.”
Surprised at the implication that she was a common topic of conversation amongst the men, she hadn’t even realised that her smile had gone a tad shy.
“Well, I’ve no idea what they’ve been telling you but I’m flattered, nonetheless.”
“Only the good things, Riv, only the good things.”
They asked her about her first day of training, how it was like to be under Mordell’s supervision. Their conversation then turned to reminiscing their cadet years, bonding over each other’s complaints of the harsh words they had to endure and unanimously agreeing that Price’s experiences were the worse with how military the way things had ran in his time.
Levina also got to see the 141’s dynamic and she commended Price for his choice of men to take under his wings. They were all honourable men, as far as she could see, each with their own set of characters and beliefs that individually distinguished them. It struck her as odd that they’ve decided she was worthy of their time, and she let their implicit validation of her character solidify the cultivating idea that she was more than just a pretty face and body. They treated her well, she liked them.
Her fatigue caught up to her in her sleep that night and her mind took a day off from picking on her in her dreams. She woke up with her entire body sore and languid, and her remedy came in the form of a hot shower and a cup of black tea.
Correct in her speculation, Price had brought two cups of drinks that morning, handing her one that had been made to her preference.
“You are a saint, Captain.”
He had given her a mirthful smile as he made to sit beside her.
“You don’t always have to keep up formalities with me, Sergeant.”
“I mean, you do call me ‘Sergeant’ a lot, Captain.”
“Touché, Sergeant. Touché.”
A delightful breath of air left her in an exhale. “Can I call you ‘Price’, then?”
“You’re more than welcomed to, Riven.”
A beat.
The flames crackled stronger.
The morning chill stood no chance against the combined warmth of her heart and the tea, both of which were prepared lovingly by the man beside her. Oh, how he had made a home out of her.
As the weeks passed, dinnertimes and mornings became her favourite parts of the day.
The group of men had, without her knowledge, agreed to occupy Levina’s dinners whenever they could. Their schedules didn’t always match but that didn’t stop them from insisting that she joined whoever was available when she was. Most of the time it was Ghost – she had learned over many conversations that he was a man who valued consistency – and at least one other person. But, by the time there came an evening where it was only him, they had already grown closer to the point where he had not minded eating in her presence.
The boys provided her a relief from a full day of hard work. They engaged her in affable chatter that opened more doors between them to grow closer, or, in the days where training had been too harsh, they still left the door open but didn’t impinge on her bubble. Their consideration only made her want to treat them equally, asking about their days with sincere interest or understandingly laying off of them when they seek quiet tranquillity after an awful day.
They had each other’s backs, the boys and her. Their friendship had been built on compassion and respect ever since they first met with weapons in each of their hands – guns in theirs, and deception in hers – though, they were never pointed at each other – except Ghost did but she held nothing against his initial apprehensions.
And then there were mornings. Those were when she got to watch her psyche’s fire develop, inching closer and closer to it as her hope gradually began to subdue her fear. She had gotten to the point where she could feel the first wave of heat wash over her, enticing her to approach nearer – to take her shelter behind it. It wasn’t like Price had done anything different, no. It was simply the fact that he allowed her to take her place beside him every morning without fail, putting effort into brewing her tea correctly, and letting her take over the reigns of their budding relationship – giving her the control that she needed, unlike Agustine who had dominated over her at every second.
She couldn’t say for sure that Price felt similarly towards her. He never gave any inclinations that he did, but neither had he rebuffed her in any way, whatsoever. Months of operating under an entirely different identity meant that she didn’t want to shut in her feelings anymore. That resulted in a new quirk of hers: unless she had to – that is, in front of anyone else other than her dear ones – she didn’t stand in the way of her eyes’ tell-all. ‘The eyes are the window to the soul’, indeed. That, paired with Price’s undeniably sharp intuition, hinted at the idea that he knew of her sprouting crush on him.
Levina could only imagine what she looked like in his eyes. Did her eyes gleam in adoration? Did her gaze linger on him at dinnertimes shared with the boys? Grace knows, the others might have also picked up on her emotions if she did.
The station didn’t have books to turn to that could help her; there were no ‘An Idiot’s Way to Know If He Has a Crush on You’ or ‘Dating 101: How to Manage Your Crush’. She could technically talk to her roommates about it, initiate a classic boy-talk sleepover, but that would only create rumours and gossips – Grace forbids, what if she got caught wanting to fraternise and more with her superior? So, yeah, not the best idea to risk that.
That left her with one more material that she could turn to for aid: memories of Agustine.
Needless to say, that was immediately out of question. Though, perhaps she could refer to them as a guide on how to spot red flags in a man.
All that is to say, she might not know the nature of his feelings for her – and every day, hers only grew stronger – nevertheless, she was content with their current stage of relationship. If more would happen, that would be to her joy; but she wasn’t selfish, she would take what she can get.
Blessed by the Grace, however, it turned out that all her worrying about the reciprocity of her feelings would come to a halt one day. And that had come with news.
The first two weeks of her training had come and gone, and it was now the third week. Sometime before she had reached her window for lunch, Mordell had actually wrapped up the day’s schedule rather abruptly.
“Laswell wants to see you. Go freshen up and see her. You can have your lunch after that and then you’ve got the rest of the day free.”
Levina did just as he ordered and visited Laswell’s office once she had showered. Lunch had already started so the quietness of her path on the way there felt oddly eerie to her. The uncanniness to her day so far only foretold the news that would be shared to her, however, where she would then be stood in front of Laswell as the earth-shattering words flowed out of the Station Chief’s mouth.
Her ears rang with screams and cries that sounded familiar to her, accompanied by a blaring siren as words of condolences and apologies began filling her head. Her eyes were locked onto the screen of the computer that Laswell had swivelled so that she could see two pictures of a girl, at different ages, and her listed details beside it.
Name: Aurora Riven (006)
Acquisition: March 27th, 2007 (8 years old)
Sold: October 16th, 2015 (16 years old)
Bid Price: $3,000,000
Bidder: Jake Griffon
The top picture had been exactly how Levina remembered her sister. Wide-eyed and innocent, she was just a child- she was eight, for fuck’s sake! Her pigtails were dishevelled, bangs unkempt, and her face was streaked with uncountable tear stains and swipes of blood. Her frightened expression here would forever haunt her.
The picture below it was the one she had seen back in February. Presumably when she was sixteen – a commemorative picture taken for the day she had been sold. Her appearance was tidy, the absence of a hair out of place and bloodstains were a sharp contrast to the first picture. Her smile here reminded Levina of Tara Darwin but whereas both Tara and Aurora seemed to be genuinely smiling, despite the years of absence, Levina knew her sister enough to tell that the latter was faked. How much had her sister gone through to have learnt how to pass off her expressions as sincere – Grace, she didn’t want to think about it.
But she had to, because reality was that and they were both living in it.
Bile made its way up her throat and she had to quickly swallow it down with great effort. Tears prickled at the corner of her eyes and this, she unfortunately couldn’t keep at bay. Laswell understood though, and she didn’t bring it up nor condemn Levina for it, sympathy clear in her eyes and her tone as she addressed the only other person in the room.
“As I’ve said, the mission was a success and we now have their system’s data on our side.”
Levina couldn’t even feel the relief if she wanted to. She only barely registered Laswell’s words in her chaotic mind.
“We’ve recognised that the name ‘Jake Griffon’ was one of the big-name buyers in your intel and we’ve ran the numbers on the records. He has bought over eight people from Agustine; it seems that she was the first.”
She took a sharp inhale.
The first. The insinuation was heavy; Griffon would’ve treated the first one he bought as an experiment before he had decided that he wanted more.
The first. Aurora had no one to relate to and she would have been all alone to fend for herself.
The first.
A pause.
Memories began invading her mind of all the times Griffon had come up as a topic in Agustine’s meetings.
“Another one?! We all know he’s loyal to that first bitch he bought- why’d he come back?!”
“They say that the beau he first took in was an easy sell. Wish I was buying then; would’ve snatched her right up from all those disgusting men!”
“What was the feedback he gave when he first came back to buy a second one? “Need me another one of those pliable bitches that you sell”, wasn’t it?”
…
Oh.
And that wasn’t even the end of the list.
Oblivious to the severity of Levina’s mind fracture, Laswell continued. “As someone who holds a high number of victims with him, he is now amongst the top target to prioritise. As of now, I am unable to tell you when an attack on him will be launched, but I will let you know once I can.”
Taking Levina’s silence as her shortage of things to add, Laswell dismissed her soon after.
Levina had one hand up on the wall as she walked away from the room. She was terrified that if she let go, there wouldn’t be anything to ground her into the real-world. But her suppressed bile had decided to come back and she couldn’t hold it in this time.
Disoriented as she ran towards the direction she was sure was to the nearest bathroom, she collided against something in full force and only stayed upright because a pair of hands held her shoulders firmly.
“Riven?”
She couldn’t even feel relieved at seeing the balaclava-clad man through her tears and weakly slapped at his arms to indicate that she wanted to be released. She’d voice it out but her lips were preoccupied with keeping shut so that the bile wouldn’t shoot up her throat, a task helped only by one hand covering her mouth securely.
Ghost did as she signalled and she wasted no time in dashing off, apologies and guilt in the back of her mind, leaving him staring after her disappearing figure in confused concern. He had seen the panic and grief crystal clear on her quivering figure which had immediately alarmed him. Never the person who others would seek out for consolation, however, he could only obey her silent request and before he knew it, she was gone. At a loss, he switched his target destination and walked back where he had come from, back into the dining hall again where his team was looking up at him in surprise.
“’Sup, Lt., you forgot sum’n?”
Shaking his head, he pointed his thumb towards the door.
“Riven- she uh… she was crying?”
Instantly, he had all of their full attention.
“What?!”
“Who-”
“Fuck, she must’ve talked to Laswell-” Now, that got his – and the others’ – attention. “where’d she-”
“The nearest bathroom from Laswell’s.”
A breeze, and the man was gone.
The three of them watched, stunned, as Price rushed out of the hall in record time. He hadn’t even bothered returning his tray, his primary concern set on Levina and all other thoughts pushed behind her.
“Should we…”
Gaz shook his head, regret crossing his features. “Price seemed to know what’s going on – we don’t. Might just make things worse if we show up.”
“Right.”
Sure, they’d seen Price move with agility – because despite his older age, he was a trained soldier – but those times were in the field and with his life on stake. Never, did they think, they’d ever see him move with such urgency for some girl unless it was an emergency. Except, it wasn’t just some girl in this case, was it?
Levina Riven had grown into their hearts, one way or another, and they genuinely loved the woman. A tribute to her name, she had struck Agustine out of the blue and torn down his empire from the top of his ranks – or at least, she was the reason for its current fall. The suddenness of her arrival in the form of her abrupt takeover of Agustine in his office that fateful day had gained her all their respects, which only continued to grow as they got to learn her character; her warmth, strength, and genuineness, among others. They couldn’t even begin to imagine what she had to go through in those seven months, dangling herself at the mercy – or lack thereof – of a heinous man. Yet, here she was, standing tall in the faces of her ghosts and conquering them one by one. It pinched at their hearts to know that she was currently suffering, but Gaz was right. If anything, they were glad that she had at least Price to confide in her troubles at the moment; he was a good man.
A good man who was presently clutching at his patience outside the ladies’ bathroom.
If he listened closely – mind you, his ears had years of training to pick up even the tiniest of sounds – he could hear heart-wrenching sobs echo from the door in front of him. Uncontrollable cries and sharp gasps continuously rained down from her and he could do nothing but listen as his heart shattered bit by bit. Fuck, he thought, she’ll come out when she’s ready.
But what if she wants someone right now?
She had no idea he was there so even if she did seek a comforting presence, she wouldn’t know that she had one right outside two sets of doors. That in mind, he brought a fist out and tapped it against the door hard enough for her to hear.
“Riven?!”
A pause in her weeping, only sniffles sounded. That meant that she had heard him.
“It’s John! I’m here if you need anything! Or- tell me to leave if you’d prefer that!”
He had missed the sound of her cubicle opening but he perked up at the sound of a tap running. Taking a step back so that he wouldn’t overwhelm Levina with his figure, her footsteps against the floor soon approached and the door opened slowly.
“John?”
The crack in her voice took his heart down with it.
“Oh, lov’ie- c’mere.”
His invitation brought around a fresh set of tears and he easily caught her when she rammed into his chest, her arms looping around his torso in seek of something to ground her.
Upon feeling one hand softly caressing her back and another gently running down her hair, the comfort that he brought had tugged on her vulnerability and she allowed herself to wail, unrestrained, in the safety of his arms. His scent, smoky and woody, hazed over her mind soothingly, quelling the horrific thoughts that had taken advantage of her solitude and had ambushed her.
“I’m sorry, Aurora- ‘m so sorry-”
“Shh, not your fault, love. She knows it’s not your fault.”
Levina shook her head, her memories haunting her relentlessly. “I’m a monster- Grace, I let him touch me!”
“Hey- hey, now. Look at me, lov’ie.”
She pulled back only enough so that she could face him. “There you are – not a monster, no.”
“But-”
He shook his head resolutely. His hand moved from her hair to cradle her cheek delicately, thumb wiping away her tears as they fell.
“All I see is a strong woman, heart full of love and so, so beautiful. A force to be reckoned with; someone who has gone through so much because she was determined to save her sister.”
The tenderness in his tone was reflected in his eyes. She could feel his conviction that was entwined into the blue, his secure belief in his soft words.
“A devoted daughter whose parents are beyond proud of. A person whom we all love and care for because she deserves it – deserves to be loved and appreciated for all the good that she’s done selflessly.”
And she’s crying again, now for a different reason.
Her hands clutched the back of his shirt tightly as she searched his face of any hint of lies – of wavering confidence – and finding not even one speck of it in his entire being. She buried her face into his shoulder, heart full of love – true to his words – and gratitude for the man.
“Grace, John. You can’t just say that so- so confidently like that!”
His shoulders shook when he let out a light laugh. “I only say it because it’s true, love. Wouldn’t have said it if I wasn’t sure even a tad.”
She felt him drop a kiss on top of her head and she tightened her arms around him. His confession of what he thought of her had taken her breath away, rendering her speechless as thoughts of him filled her with endless affirmations that she was a good person – someone deserving of love because she loved.
She loved her sister and she had done what she could to bring her home. There was nothing she could do to rectify the entire ordeal, their fates had been sealed that day of the home invasion, but she could try now – and try, she would, to the best of her ability. Aurora would come home, she would make sure of it.
Unbothered by her lack of words, John simply held her right then, right there. His hands never stopped their reassuring caress as he patiently waited for her sniffles to die down to a steady breath. Grace, she loved this man.
Unkeen to show up in the dining hall in her state, John led her to his office instead. His hand fixed itself onto the small of her back, not forceful but steadying. The plan had been to let her rest in his office while he went and grabbed her something from lunch – anything more filling than the energy bar he had in his desk – but that flew out the window when they spotted three figures stood outside his door with two sets of wrapped sandwiches in the hands of one of them.
“Guys?”
Upon hearing Levina’s voice, their kicked-puppy expressions lit up as their heads turned to regard the approaching pair.
“Riv! And Cap.”
John huffed at the too-serious-to-be-sincere tone of disappointment Soap had used when addressing him. Though, with the way that had earned a giggle from the woman beside him, he’d let Soap off any day.
“Sorry I ran off on you earlier, Ghost. In my defence, I really did have to puke.”
“No harm, glad you’re a’ight now.”
She didn’t miss the worry that crossed their expressions and gave them what she hoped was a reassuring smile.
Everyone entered the office once John had unlocked it, spreading around on the two couches facing each other that were separated by a wooden coffee table. She ended up in between Gaz and John, the latter on her right, and opposite Ghost and Soap, sandwich in hand. Figuring Ghost must have told the others of her earlier state, and hence, how John had known where she was, she decided to clear the air to ease them of their anxieties.
They listened attentively as she shared her sister’s current situation, how that had been her drive behind her long-con, and her belief that she was still alive based on what she had heard in Agustine’s meetings, however passing the remarks about her sister were. The boys shared their sympathies, cursing Agustine out and assuring her that her sister would come home. Their support touched her and John’s words repeated in her head.
A person whom we all love and care for because she deserves it.
They let the pair eat – because John had unceremoniously left lunch mid-way – while they began conversing about anything and everything. Recognising that she had had a rough day though, the trio left the pair to unwind. Unbeknownst to them, Soap had been about to naively question as to why Levina was staying at John’s but a quick pinch to his side from Ghost had shut him up quick.
It was a new venture, their flourishing relationship, and they silently agreed to keep matters private for the meantime as they endeavoured to see where it would take them. So, it was only when the door had shut after the boys that she allowed herself to inch closer to John, his arm instantly going around her back to hold her by her waist as she leaned against his side, head falling onto his shoulder. Her arms went to loop around him in a side-hug and she felt him tug her closer to plant his lips on her head, before resting his head on hers.
“She would’ve liked to meet you and the others. My mum, I mean.”
Her voice was low to match the serenity between them, fondness discernible in her words. Inevitably, her thoughts had fallen onto her mother whose life had been taken away too early – unfairly – by the hands of the home invaders who had taken away Aurora.
“Yeah? Would’ve loved to meet her too. Thank her for having raised an absolute dear.”
She hummed a pleased sigh, confession at the tip of her tongue. “We bonded over our love for love, growing up. H’ve always dreamt of falling in love, but mum made it hard because she’d always say, “they won’t deserve you, not until they’ve built you a fire that doesn’t consume, but gives”. Never knew what she meant until I’ve found one that gave me peace; gave me safety, comfort.”
His hand tightened its hold on her waist. “Someone’s built you one?”
She hummed, affirmative, lifting her head up to meet his eyes – the blue that had intensified under the utter adoration written over them.
“He’s been tending to it every morning.”
Fondness brought his lips up into a tender smile. He leaned in, slowly to give her time to react, and placed his lips onto hers in a soft touch. Their eyes fell shut for that brief moment. She felt his hand brush away her hair before cradling her face to hold her head steady when he pressed forward, pouring his affections into the kiss, before pulling away.
“I’d build you a home with a massive hearth to go with it too.”
She was certain that her eyes were shining with unbridled love, but she didn’t mind it for there was reciprocity in his eyes. “’m no good with architecture, but I’d at least give you a hand somehow.”
“So long as you’re there, love. I’d make sure the place is big enough to host the boys too. ‘nd your dad and sister.”
Grace, he knew her heart so well. “Family nights with everyone.”
“Mhm. Then there’re nights for the both of us.”
“I’d love that. W’d love everything about it; the hearth, the size… you.”
“Yeah?”
“Mhm.”
The quietness – the peace. The domesticity of it all had been gradually lulling her to sleep. Her enervation fogged her brain, but she still had enough clarity to express her psyche truthfully. A content hum vibrated from her throat, like a cat purring under the affection it received, successfully tempting John to pet her head gingerly and further pulling her into unconsciousness. She blinked her eyes open, unsure when she had even closed them in the first place, and laid her feelings bare for John to see.
“Love you.”
His eyes glinted. He detected no inkling of deception in her words nor soul, and he could feel her emotions flow out of her to envelop him comfortably. His answer was clear – inherent in his mind, soul, and body – and nothing could stop him from conveying it to the one who had struck him with so, so much yearning. Levina was a once-in-a-lifetime wonder and he would hold onto her for as long as she allowed him to.
“I love you, too.”
She fell asleep not long after that, the warmth of her partner cozying her to dreamland. Blurry images of an unfamiliar interior accompanied by the distinct figures of her loved ones brought her an abundant of joy and she swore to turn it into a real-life memory one day.
A gentle stroke of her hair and a call of her name stirred her out of sleep. The dream-induced happiness was still present and when her bleary gaze fell onto John, she realised that that artificial happiness would never measure up to the genuine one that he sparked in her.
“Dinnertime, lov’ie. You up for that?”
She gave an affirmative hum and sat up – John must have laid her on the couch while she was asleep – stretching out her limbs to further bring herself awake. The admiration in John’s eyes, as he looked up at her from where he was crouched in front of the couch, knocked the breath out of her lungs and she could just feel the love, love, love swirling giddily in her.
Unable to resist her desires, she reached out to hold him by the juncture of his neck and head and leaned in to press a chaste kiss on his lips. He grabbed onto one of her hands and held it securely in his. Their hands remained clasped even as they made their way out of his office, only separating at the first sight of someone else. It was a mutual decision to do so, and she didn’t mind it – too much – because she valued her privacy for now.
The others were already in the dining hall by the time the couple got there. Relief washed over them at her well-rested appearance and the little smile playing on her lips, no doubt an effect of being with their captain. The pair seemed to almost glow in the presence of each other and the boys were glad that they had found each other.
After leaving Levina with John earlier, in the privacy of Ghost’s office, they were unconstrained in talking about the pair of lovebirds – all in good heart. They hadn’t missed the lovelorn eyes they would send each other when one wasn’t looking and, after realising just how bad her break down must have been upon learning the reason behind it, knowing that John had managed to bring her back to safety had confirmed their hypothesis.
Dinner that evening felt even more homely to Levina. Constant validation from John had turned on a new light to view herself and her boys – her additional family. She was loved and she deserved it, John’s words looped around her head, she was a good person and she loved with all her heart. She was more than her beauty – it was her heart’s beauty that made her who she was. No more pretences needed, she was safe and sound. Not broken.
With her newfound strength, the days seemed to pass by indistinctively. Most of her time was, of course, spent training under Lieutenant Mordell. She had her moments of rest from dinner until breakfast, finding refuge in the boys. It was soon the last day of her training where Mordell would have her run through every drill under his close watch. The day had started with waking up from a dreamless sleep, a warm shower to ease her nerves, and John.
They had met with a kiss as he handed over her cup of tea, before settling themselves into their usual position where Levina had her legs up and folded to the side with one arm looping round John’s back as she leaned into his side, his arm also rounding her back to hold her close by the waist. It was winter now but that didn’t stop them from putting on layers to battle against the cold.
“How’re you feeling today?”
She gave a hum, thinking over her words as she picked through her nerves. “Nervous- very. But I’ve also seen more approving nods from Lieutenant Mordell in the past week than ever, so I think I’ll do fine.”
“Mhm, ‘course you will. Ghost also has high hopes for you and you know he doesn’t give them out easily. You’ll do wonderful, love.”
Snuggling further into him, she breathed in his woody scent, feeling it soothe over her skin. His words tickled her heart and she allowed her flames to travel through her body to alleviate her burdens.
His confidence in her didn’t end there, however, and she found herself flushing lightly during breakfast as she stared at the unfamiliar soldier who had entered the dining hall with a bouquet in his arms.
“Delivery for one ‘Levina Riven’ from-” he squinted his eyes at the tag connected to the wrappings “-‘your Firestarter’?!”
So that was why John had decided to stay for breakfast.
The room had quietened down at the man’s exclamation and she could feel multiple eyes on her. Her blush clear on her cheeks, she avoided meeting anyone’s eyes as she got up from her seat to beeline straight to the man stood in front of the door. Hushed whispers gradually grew louder to a normal volume. Though, she could tell that some of the topics of conversations were centred around her. Exchanging a word of thanks with the deliverer, she carefully took hold of the bouquet and rushed back to her seat with the boys. She cleared her throat as she sat back down, trying to regain her composure but to no avail when she locked eyes with John.
The sweet smile playing on his lips were enough to still the world around them. She barely registered Gaz leaning over to catch a glimpse of the bouquet with a question directed at her. The outer corner of John’s eyes crinkled as he watched her every reaction, harsh lines softening his features that she wanted to trace with her fingertips – or lips – so badly. His eyes gleamed with pride at having caught her off-guard, gratified to see the warmth to her cheeks matching the pink Astilbes that stood tall amongst the Siberian Squills and yellow Peonies in her bouquet.
He nudged his head in the direction of her left, amusement radiating off of him. Levina turned, only to be met with Gaz’s teasing grin. It was then that she remembered that he had asked her something and she had yet to reply. A sheepish smile made its way to her lips, “sorry, what was that?”
“He asked if you’ve gone deaf.”
Soap proceeded to yelp when Ghost ruthlessly slapped him at the back of his head.
Gaz shook his head and nodded to the bouquet in her arms. “What’d he get you?”
“Oh,” her eyes flickered around the pastel palette, “uhh… I think these ones’re peonies?”
Helpless at identifying the flowers, she looked to John whose smile had not faltered the slightest. He gave an airy chuckle at her lost expression and fought the urge to lean over for a kiss when she pouted at him. One by one, he named the flowers and gave a short explanation for each of their meanings.
Patience, “I will be waiting for you”. Hope and perseverance. Good luck.
The boys’ crooning filled her ears but her mind was fully entranced by her sight and John’s echoed voice.
The Siberian Squills encouraged her to stay strong – that it would all go well in time, so long as she kept her spirits. The best wishes he conveyed through the yellow Peonies were charming. It reminded her of the breathtaking kiss that he had given her earlier this morning – a ‘good luck’ kiss, he had said. The pink Astilbes; they’ve long revealed their thoughts on one another, so what could he be waiting for? They’ve yet to unclothe each other so, perhaps it could be about that? But, no; she understood him enough to know that he wouldn’t display that patience out of the blue – he would never risk an impression that would pressure her to bare her body like that, not after what she had gone through.
The other two flower types had something to do with their jobs; that she’d get her sister back in due time and that she’ll manage today’s intensive training’s final inspection well. And then what? Once she had passed that, she’ll be given assignments to complete, and she can’t do that if she didn’t have a team. The decision as to where she would end up all depended on who wanted her, which captain-
Oh?
Captain John Price.
John was a captain.
She had long forgone calling him ‘Captain’ unless someone else, bar her boys, was present that she’d forgotten he was one. Stories of Captain Price were commonly regulated around the compound; tales regaling his competence, his unfailing capability, the long list of his accomplishments. She had heard others share their desires to operate under his orders – that he was a famously sought-after man in the Army. The Captain Price who led TF141 with dignity.
The John Price who loved her, and she, him.
Her John.
Surely he hadn’t meant-
Her hands paused in its subconscious brushing of the petals as she lifted her head. His eyes were already on her – Grace, did he even look away once? – and he raised an eyebrow in question when he registered the uncertain surprise on her face. Right, she thought, he can’t read minds.
Shaking her head to get rid of her theories – because she’ll know the outcome of her team appointment in the coming days anyway – she gave him an appreciative smile that she hoped had passed along the emotions from the bottom of her heart. Her mind began to wander as to where she might find a vase in the station as she laid her eyes on the blooming buds again, her fingers moving from petals to petals to feel the smooth texture as the non-imposing fragrance wafted over her nose.
The final inspection went great. Though, she had been surprised by the existence of an audience at every station of the drills. Apparently, the newbies’ trainer had given the men some time off that day and had told them of the occurrence of her drills.
“Told ‘em I’d be testing a returning veteran on her foundations,” Mordell had told her when she had first spotted the fresh faces surveying her, “guess they wanted to see an example of what they could be by the end of their newbie training.”
Oh, the subtle but heavy pressure he had placed on her shoulders.
But that went alright!
The boys had given her a round of congratulations when they met again at dinnertime. Finally the end of eight continuous weeks of maximum effort, the boys had promised to treat her to a night of drinks that weekend. John had then walked her back to her room and had left her breathing heavily in front of her closed door with a heated kiss.
Thank Grace, he had left before she entered her room because the other girls had been in and, judging by their knowing grins, they had a fairly good idea what had caused her face to flush. They didn’t pry though, only voicing out their light-hearted envy at the vase of flowers that she had decided would suit the room – the girls had agreed too.
Then, she had woken up to snowfall.
Standing at the doorway to the barracks, she reached a hand out to catch the snow with her ungloved palm. Mesmerised by the glittering flakes, and assured with the belief that the only other person who would see her then would be John, she hadn’t heard his footsteps approach behind her and startled slightly when she heard his gruff voice and felt a pair of hands reaching for her waist.
“You’ll catch a cold, love.”
Pivoting on the spot, her face lit up and John was quick to give her a peck on her lips. She took her cup from him and let the warmth fuel her blood when she took a sip.
“Mm, it’s pretty though.”
Upon her revelation that she wanted to watch the snowing sky, he turned her back around and stepped in so that she had her back flush against his chest and wrapped his arms around her midriff, thereupon she could enjoy the sight while still having him pressed up against her.
She felt dizzy knowing that John would satisfy her requests without question.
They shared their plans for the day. Due to the weather showing no signs of stoppage, schedules had been halted and plans were limited to indoor activities. Coincidentally, the times they had set aside for the gym had intersected and oh, how torturous of a time it had been for the both of them.
The immense size of the gym had not – could not – stop their eyes from wandering.
They worked on themselves separately and there was a considerable amount of distance between them even as they moved from one machinery to the other. Once they had a set going on, their focus rendered them oblivious to the world and it just so happened that when one of them were deep into their workout, the other would be resting. Hence, they had not even noticed each other eyeing them up with need burning in the other’s gaze.
Each had their own ardent tension plaguing their minds that evening, and it all came to a head the next day, where they had shared a fervid moment that morning that only teased them with what was to come that night.
It was a Saturday morning – the weekend night out with the boys was to happen that night. The couple had found themselves in the same position as the morning prior, except it wasn’t snowing. The dawn air was chilly enough to avoid though, so they stayed indoors and only gazed out the window.
Or, at least, Levina was doing that while John had his face buried into the juncture of her neck.
Their individual tensions, brought over from the other day, had coalesced into a palpable haze dancing around them. Unwilling to let it cloud his mind, John allowed himself to only pepper her skin with lingering kisses, unaware of the effect he was making on her. When he had unknowingly nudged on a sensitive area near her pulse point, she accidentally let a whimper escape her throat and it was only then that he paused. Having mistaken the noise as a sound of protest in his panic, a string of apologies immediately left his lips as he lifted his head up, only to stop abruptly when his breath got caught in his throat upon seeing her face.
Levina had been worrying her lower lip with her teeth in an attempt to suppress the noises she had been wanting to make ever since John had started his ministration on her neck. That had given her a naturally pouty lip that only brought upon chaos in John’s mind. Her cheeks were tinted pink from the cool air and the heat of his touch, his scent – him. And then, there were her eyes that had rendered his brain static; his thoughts only on her and her alone.
Having to look up at him due to their heights, her eyes opened rather widely and he could nearly see his reflection if he tried hard enough. Her eyelash batted at him innocently, a far cry from the thoughts running uncontrollably in her mind; the thoughts that she was sure he could get a read on by the look in her eyes. They were almost teary, shining in the dim lights of the barracks and the subtle glow of the waking sun. Her desire was clearly written on them, with a hint of plead for him to cease his teasing kisses and to do something-
And who was he to deny her needs?
It was a miracle that his coffee didn’t spill over with how fast he had been in swooping down and capturing her lips. Surprised by his fervour but beyond pleased with it, a reflexive moan echoed from her throat which he eagerly swallowed down. She adjusted herself to face her body towards him and brought her unoccupied hand up to tangle itself in his hair. His arms around her waist tightened their hold and pulled her closer towards him – he had to rapidly calm himself down once he felt her clothed breasts press up against him.
Their tongues met in a messy dance. Breaths were exchanged with a rush of hot air, the occasional sighs adding into the mix. His hand roamed her back, up her spine to her nape, where he held her head steady as he pulled back slightly. Her whine at the loss of his lips promptly turned into a gasp when he attacked her neck instead. But unlike the earlier pecks he planted throughout her skin, he went straight to the spot that had elicited a whimper out of her and bit into it lightly. To allay the – pleasurable – pain, he proceeded to lick and suckle at her skin, drawing out mewls after mewls from her. He tasked himself to locate as many of her sweet spots as he could, up her neck and down to her shoulders.
“Oh, John…”
The breathy tone of her voice calling out to his name earned her a groan out of the man. As if that wasn’t enough to heat her up, his assault on her skin had ramped up a notch and she found herself putty in his arms. Grace, she would just have to change her underwear later with how damp she could feel herself get. He had also given her enough material to reminisce tonight when she would have to relieve herself of her lust; from the way his eyes had darkened when he had noticed just how desperate he had made her, to the stiffness she could feel prodding into her thigh.
Honing into the area that she seemed the most responsive to yet, he nipped at it mercilessly.
“Ah- h-”
He soothed the reddened patch with kitten licks, giving a final wet kiss onto it before he lifted his head up to plant a chaste kiss on her lips. His eyes strayed to the ruined state of her neck and collarbones, appreciating the cherry marks scattering the expanse of her exposed skin, then to her debauched face – watery eyes, flushed cheeks, kiss-bitten lips, and lust all over her expression.
“Fuck, love. Y’look so pretty all ruined like this.”
Her lips curled up at his compliment, a personification of seductive in her smile and breathless voice. “Yeah? Wanna look pretty for you.”
“Shit-” she was going to be the death of him. He returned to his lips onto hers and muttered in between kisses, “ always so pretty for me, love. So good f’me.”
She hummed, content and in bliss.
They both knew that they had a time limit – and despised it. That in mind, they forcefully slowed down to innocent – not really – kisses accompanied by praises shared under their breaths. They had to excuse themselves to their bathrooms before the barracks came alive lest someone walked in on their dishevelled state; John, to alleviate himself of the pressure in his pants, and Levina, to conceal the marks that remained exposed despite her jacket – except, she had missed one and had to enlist her bunk-mate’s help when the latter had pointed it out with a teasing grin. Bless her heart, her roommate had not asked any questions.
The rest of the day went as planned. The boys and Levina had lunch at the compound before they all left with permissions from the signed short-leave form for the day. The five of them occupied John’s car as he had volunteered to be the driver for the day, who then gave everyone a ride to their respective places to spend the rest of the day before they would reconvene in the evening. Levina’s place had been the second nearest so she alighted the car once it stopped in front of her apartment.
“Text me when you’re leaving, hm?”
John had rolled down his window and she turned to him, momentarily stupefied by the sight of him with one hand on the steering wheel and a casual arm draped over the window. She gave an affirmative hum as she flicked her eyes back from the muscles enhancing his arm to his eyes, which twinkled upon having caught her gawking at him.
She gave him a sheepish smile, “drive safe, love.”
“Will do.”
Ignoring the two other men in the car – they already knew of their relationship even without having to tell them – she leaned down and gave John a peck on his lips.
“See you tonight.”
Leaving him with her whisper chiming in his head, she walked up the path to the building and accessed the front door with her key card. She gave her dad a hug once she made it to her unit and leaned against the kitchen counter as she waited for the kettle to boil.
“He drove you here then, your John?”
“Mhm. Dropped Soap off first, then, it was me. Ghost and Gaz are next.”
“Driving you back later? After the pub?”
“Yep! He won’t be drinking, so you can relax, dad.”
She grinned knowingly when he gave an approving nod as he considered her words, muttering something about John being a responsible man.
Never one to judge her love life, she had no qualms in telling her dad over the phone about John the day after the couple had gotten together. Her sister’s circumstances still confidential, she could only cite that previous day as a ‘particularly hard time’ to her dad and shared with him how John had managed to get her back on her feet. How he had chosen to comfort her over finishing his lunch, the way he had not held back from confessing his true thoughts of her – unlike the boys in high school who avoided doing that in fear of their broken masculinity – and the safety and love that his fire gave her, just like her mother had always said.
Her dad had consoled her when tears had threatened to escape as she remembered that day, and he had voiced out his gratitude for John after all that she had told him. But dad would, of course, always be dad, and he was undoubtedly protective of his daughter. Though, knowing how happy John made her, her dad’s worries were at least somewhat assuaged.
They spent the afternoon talking in the living room until she had to prepare for the night out. This being the first time she could have an extended rest since her intensive training had started, she was determined to pamper herself.
One long shower later, she had her hair up in a towel-twist and she was sat in her vanity, delicately putting on her makeup. Having spent most of her teenage and adult years in the military meant that makeups were a rare treat so she stuck to the style that she knew and only accentuated her features with cosmetics – and to cover the marks on her neck. Then, it was her hair’s turn to focus on and she dedicated enough time to style the wolf cut properly instead of leaving it up to the permed waves to do its job. By the end of it all, she applauded herself on a job well done as she stared at herself in the mirror.
The Evil Queen could never, she thought.
After mulling it over for a while – more time than she should, really – she picked out a black semi-sweetheart tube top to go with a pair of jeans, and a black jacket over it to shelter her from the cold. Spraying her perfume once she managed to zip the curve-defining top up, she grabbed her purse to pack the things she might need. Aside from the necessities, she brought her travel-sized makeup products in case she wanted to touch up her face and then a thought crossed her mind. Glancing at her mirror, she surveyed her collarbone area where she knew John’s marks laid. She would rather keep it hidden from her dad when she had to see him later, but John?
…so pretty all ruined like this.
Her cheeks flushed lightly at the low voice echoing in her mind. Right, she thought, that was a decision made for her. She fitted a small bottle of makeup remover and a couple of cotton pads to go with it into her purse and searched for her phone for the time. Not late, plenty of time. Though, as she scrolled through her notifications, some of the boys were beginning to leave so she might as well. Giving herself a final once over in the mirror, she grabbed her selected heels for the night and exited her room.
“Look at you! You look gorgeous, sweetheart!”
She grinned at her dad and pecked his cheeks in thanks. Ordering herself a ride, she bid her father goodnight and went downstairs to wait for its arrival. Once she was on her way, she sent a quick message to the others and shared her location upon Ghost’s demand. It was a silent ride and she gave her thanks to the driver when they made it to their location.
She aimed straight for the semi-circular booth at the far left-hand corner where John had saved a table for them and spotted him and Soap already there. Their senses sharp, they had noticed her approaching and Soap sent her a wave.
“Lev!”
“Hey Soap! John,” she gave the latter a greeting kiss after she had entered the booth to take her place next to him. His arm immediately slithered past her back to hold her waist securely.
“You look stunning, love.”
“Yeah? So do you, John,” she glanced down to his chest where she could see his shirt hugging his muscles and involuntarily bit her lip. “You look good.”
His hand gripped her waist tighter and she knew her gawping had been caught red-handed. She feigned innocence and returned his heavy gaze with a sweet smile before turning to look at the other occupant at the table, trying to ignore the heat in her gut that had been ignited.
Ghost and Gaz arrived soon after and the first round of drinks went by in a flash. Conversations were had, laughs were shared, and playful debates were brought up. When Gaz had gone to the bar to get them more drinks, Levina excused herself to ‘touch up her makeup’.
In the bathroom, she wiped the stretch of her neck clean of products and reapplied her lipstick, taking her jacket off too seeing as it was rather warm indoors. Once she was satisfied, she re-entered the pub just as Soap walked past her towards the men’s bathroom. He gave a low whistle when he caught sight of the marks and she shot him a proud grin.
“Look at you! Poor lass got herself mauled by a beast!”
He then assured her that he would give them more time alone than the bathroom needs him – Ghost had gone ahead to help Gaz with bringing the drinks over – giving her a high-five for the fun of it. His positive reaction had fuelled her confidence even more and she let herself saunter up to the booth. It was only when she was close enough could John make out the marks littering her skin in the glow of the lights.
“Fuck.”
John already had trouble keeping his eyes away from her exposed skin ever since she had first walked into the pub, only for her to expose more and reveal the evidence of his claim on her.
Grace, the tease.
His eyes dipped to her neckline and spanned across her bare collar, tracing each fading mark up her shoulders to her neck. He readily reached an arm out to pull her closer by her hips when she made to sit next to him, his other hand going up to trail his fingers over the pink skin. The marks that he had made on her – his marks.
His Levina.
He finally looked up to meet her eyes and nearly groaned upon seeing the pride and confidence in them. “Shit, love. D’you like ‘em that much?”
She rested her arms on his shoulders and linked her hands behind him, keeping him from straying away – not that he ever would. She hummed, the sound tantalising to his ears.
“Very. Do you not like them?”
The obvious pouty tone to her words allured him and his lips were on hers before he knew it. The muffled whimper she made went straight to his lap and he had to resist the need to have her on top of him at that moment. Pulling away slightly, distantly aware that they were very much in public, he managed to make out his words in a gruff.
“Course I do, lov’ie. So much so, I’m tempted to give you more now.”
She giggled when his lips slipped downwards and began kissing her chin, down to the neck. “Can’t do, John. The others’ll be here soon.”
This time, he did groan into her neck, frustrated at the cockblock.
She pulled his head out of the juncture below her ears and gazed deeply into his eyes, her next word full of promises and yearning.
“Later.”
There was no hint of hesitancy in her tone nor expression. She had only had a mocktail thus far and had another glass of juice coming up so they both knew she was clear-headed. The heavy desire running through her bones showed in her eyes and John knew he was fucked.
The boys then came in to break their staring contest, teases at the tip of their tongues. John only grunted in response though, brain too frazzled to think of a comeback when Levina had her hand resting on his thigh dangerously.
They nursed themselves to two more rounds of drinks before they had to call it a night when Soap wouldn’t stop singing into their ears and the topics of their talks gradually became sadder and sadder. They also had to suddenly pull Ghost back – all hands on deck – when he almost walked straight into the glass door without any indication of opening it.
The car was blanketed in a comfortable silence during the ride back to base. Three of them had alcohol buzzing in their blood, enough to render them serene and, in Gaz’s case, knocked out. The fully-conscious pair helped them into the barracks where they then insisted that they would be fine alone.
“We’re not gon’ leave you blue-balled no more. ‘ve a safe sex, lass, Cap’n.” Soap had whispered, or at least tried to. It came out more like a series of hushed gibberish.
That had pulled out a shy grin from Levina and a sigh from John. Only when the boys had turned around the corner did the couple look to each other.
He closed the distance between them and brushed her hair away from her face, taking in her patient smile with one of his own. “You sure about this?” She hummed affirmatively and was about to nod when his hold on her chin stopped her. “Words, darling.”
His assertive tone had her biting her lip as she shyly blinked up at him. “Yes, John. Want you to have me,” Her hand trailed up to hold his cheek, feeling the rough scratch of his beard on her palm, “as much ‘s I want to have you.”
“You have me, love. Always have.”
He surged in to plant a short, but heavy, kiss on her lips. “Shall we?”
She hummed again but paused when she remembered his words, “yes, please.”
With an arm wrapped around her back, he led her towards his room.
His room was quaint. It was evident that John tended to spend more time in his office than his bedroom when her eyes fell on the neat stacks of papers decorating his desk. Otherwise, the place lacked any notable decorations and was simply very John.
How charming, she thought fondly.
His eyes were already on hers when she turned back to him. As if he could guess her thoughts, his eyes softened and he tugged her to his chest, her arms going around his neck to stabilise herself. He dipped his head low to meet her lips softly and she couldn’t help but smile into the kiss at his tenderness.
She pressed forward and tilted her head to deepen the kiss and he followed suit. His hands wandered upwards to her shoulders where he grabbed hold of her jacket. Receiving his hint, she shrugged off the garb and let him toss it aside in the vague direction of his chair – it ended up on the floor and she breathed out a laugh when the thump sounded. A shiver coursed through her at the feel of his wandering hands before his lips parted from hers to start leaving kisses down to her shoulders instead. He paved a path of light kisses connecting the old marks, then, up to her ears where he whispered for her to, “jump.”
Her trust in him unwavering, she obeyed his request straight away and wrapped her legs around his hips just as his hands caught her by her thighs without as much as a grunt. Their lips met again, more heated this time, as he brought them to the edge of his bed to lay her gently onto the sheets. Her breaths hitched when his lips began to nip onto the uncharted territory, that was her sternum, while his hands moved up and back to feel out for her zipper. His movements as he unzipped her top was slow, always giving her the silent opportunity to stop him in case she changed her mind. His consideration struck her heart with more affection and she lifted his head up to give him a short giggly kiss of gratitude. That brought a fond smile out of the man, his endearment for her growing upon seeing her joy.
Finally, the zipper unlatched and he pulled the top off of her body, adding it onto the growing pile without taking his eyes away from her. The darkening of his gaze as he studied her body with the intention of etching it onto his brain only added fuel to the fire in her gut and she couldn’t help but let out a whine when he made no move to touch her.
“Hm?” Understanding her wordless cue, his hands moved up from her clothed hips to map out her bare skin. Up her waist, in towards her stomach, up again to catch her breasts in both hands. A gasp left her when he thumbed her nipples gingerly and the first moan of the night, in a series of many. escaped her when he pinched them harshly, just a touch away from pain. “’s this what you wanted, sweetheart?”
“Yes, please…”
The breathy tone of her voice aroused him further and he leaned in to place a kiss on her chest. “Y’don’t need to worry, sweetheart. ‘m gonna take care of you.”
Another kiss onto her breast, “my pretty girl.”
One more, nearer to her bundle of nerves, “so beautiful.”
She could feel his beard tickle her bud this time, “fuck, the things you do to me.” And then he took one nub in his mouth.
A broken moan sounded from her as he swirled, flicked, and pressed his tongue against her nipple, his hand coming up to mimic the actions on her other breast. She keened when he sucked on it lightly and she subconsciously pushed his head closer to her chest.
“Jo-hn-”
He hummed in acknowledgement without pausing in his movements. Switching to latch onto the other breast, the cool air hitting her wet bud as his fingers toyed with it alongside his mouth playing with the other sent a rough wave of pleasure to her cunt and she felt herself gush before she knew it, her eyes crossing involuntarily. “Fuck!”
With the way her legs twitched around his hips in the aftershock of her mini-orgasm, it was unavoidable that he realised what had just occurred. He let go of her nub with a wet pop and grinned at her in wonder. “Did you just cum, sweetheart?”
A flush made its way to her cheeks and she smiled sheepishly. “I think so? ‘s never happened before.”
“Fuck, love. That’s hot.”
He recaptured her lips with speed while his hands drifted to her hips to undo her jeans, hooking his fingers into her bottom garments to tug it down her legs. She lifted her hips up to aid in his task and let him discard her pants and underwear at once, leaving her completely nude under his touch.
Separating himself from her, he got down on his knees and brought her legs up onto his shoulder to plant kisses up her calf to her thigh. He then pushed her thighs open wider which prompted her to lift her legs up to plant her feet on the edge of the bed comfortably, thus, exposing her glistening cunt to his hungry eyes.
He traced a finger up her slit, gathering her dampness up to her clit which he pressed gently before rubbing it in tight circles. Listening to her trembling breaths for any indication of her pleasure, he stopped his ministrations and, instead, prodded her entrance with his middle finger. Considering her state, it slipped in with ease and he added in another finger after a few thrusts. Feeling the stretch, little slips of moans left her throat which quickly turned into a mewl when he curled his fingers upwards. Once he had found her sweet spot, he massaged it gently to pull out more noises from her. Only the best for his lover, doubtlessly, he leaned in to flick his tongue against her swollen clit. Taken by surprise for her eyes were currently closed, an unrestrained moan echoed in the room when his lips engulfed her clit to administer similar movements as he had done to her nipples earlier.
The lewd sounds as he lapped and sucked on her only fogged their minds in more lust. With the desperate and earnest attention he gave her clit while his fingers pumped in and out and curled against her sweet spot, it didn’t take long for her to feel another orgasm approach.
“John! ‘m gonna cum- ha-”
She didn’t even know that his actions could get any more intense but he managed it somehow. The coil in her guts tightened harshly before, all at once, it loosened up and unravelled, sending waves upon waves of pleasure through her body. His name left the tip of her tongue as her eyes rolled back reflexively, her hands clenching the bedsheet underneath her tightly and her legs stiffening in place as he guided her in riding out her orgasm. The pleasure eventually became too much and her hands flew to his head to push it away from her sensitive nerves. His fingers slowed down its thrusts into an eventual stop and he pulled them out as he rose from his knees to level his head above hers.
He allowed a moment to admire the sight of her post-orgasmic state; eyes gleaming with unshed tears and lips parted as she panted for air. Giving her space to catch her breath, he kissed her down her neck appreciatively, only returning to her lips once her breaths had evened out slightly.
“Mm, you did so good for me, love. My good girl, hm?”
“Yours…” She gave a satisfied hum, tasting her sweet tang on his tongue.
Her hands went under his shirt to get a feel for his muscles and he pulled away briefly to take off the clothing. She tracked her fingers all around his torso, pressing into his flesh lightly as she memorised each section of stiff muscles and soft fats that formed his body that she loved so much. The awe in her expression as she eyed his body gave him more confidence than he knew what to do with, choosing to take this opportunity to shed off the rest of his clothes instead. She zealously drank in the sight of him in all his glory, her eyes falling onto his hand stroking his length languidly.
He pulled her closer to the edge of the bed and she lifted her upper body up, resting on her propped-up elbow behind her. Reaching in between them, she wrapped a hand around his girth, biting her lips upon feeling the angry veins running across his skin as she caressed him up and down. The sound of his breath hitching brought her eyes back to his and she was shameless in conveying her need through her stare. Unable to resist her allure, he rested an arm on the bed and caught her lips in a feverish kiss, leaving them breathless when he asked, “condom?”
She shook her head. “IUD. And clean. You?”
“Clean.”
The teasing grin on her lips was as bewitching as any and her eyes seemed to gleam under the lights. As she swiped her thumb over the tip of his cock, she invited, “have me, John. ‘m yours.”
“Yeah? You’ve got me, too, lov’ie- fuck,” he grunted when she squeezed her hand around the head as she pumped him shallowly, drawing out a bead of precum which she proceeded to smear over him. Decidedly not enough lubricant, she angled him down to rub the head against her slit, gasping when it caught onto her clit. He aligned his hips with hers for ease and moved it so that he was rubbing his length against her cunt, covering himself in her slick and priding himself in the little breathless moans she made. Once he paused in his movements, she took the chance to line up his cock against her cunt, meeting his eyes with so much certainty that he didn’t hesitate in pushing in slightly.
She whimpered when the head slipped in without resistance and watched the concern flicker in his eyes the more he filled her. He paused when she took a sharp inhale halfway in and opted instead to pull back slightly before thrusting forward in slow shallow thrusts. That helped her adjust to his size and he had her moaning softly soon enough. With every thrust, he slipped further in, bit by bit, as her sweet noises grew in volume along with his low grunts.
“Please…”
“Hm? What d’you need, sweetheart?”
Her voice was desirous, a reflection of her expression, as she whimpered out, “more, please.” At the last bit of length yet to enter her, he did as she pleaded and pushed forwards with force so that her hips were flush against his. “Oh, fu- hah-”
He gave her a moment of recess before starting out his thrusts at a faster rate, groaning at her tightness clenching down on him. Her hands searched for purchase in the sheets below her and he gave her right hand his left to hold onto instead, intertwining their fingers and letting her grip onto it as hard as she wanted.
The obscene squelch every time he drove into her had him looking down where their bodies met and he nearly moaned at the filthy sight of the white rings and streaks of fluid decorating his cock as her juices spilled onto the floor excessively. “Shit, love. You’re dripping. Creaming all over me, too.” She gave a whine, as if embarrassed, but he knew better. “So fucking wet for me, hm?”
Nodding, she glanced down to see his length covered in white liquid – her juices – and fuck, wasn’t that such an arousing sight? “Mm- ha… ‘s all yours, John. ‘m all wet f’you.”
Seeing her try to speak in between moans and pants to declare that she was his turned him on even more than he thought could be possible. Wanting nothing but bliss for her, he slanted his hips to aim his thrusts upwards and-
“John! Fuck! Ha… I- oh my…”
He delighted himself in hearing her nonsensical blabber as pleasure overtook her senses. Gone, were her rational thoughts, and all she wanted was to let him know just how good he made her feel.
“So good… fucking- ha- h- y’feel s’good…”
“Yeah? Fuck- y’feel so good too, lov’ie. So tight, so warm for me.”
At his praise, a little grin made its way to her lips, so innocent – so sweet – that it looked utterly erotic.
That triggered another wave of arousal over him and he could feel his edge approach in the far distance. He wouldn’t finish without her, however, and he trailed one hand down her body to circle her clit firmly. Her arms gave out below her and she fell back with a cry.
“Oh, my Grace. Oh, Grace- oh, fuck!” Her hand clutched his tighter as her pitch went higher and higher. Her other hand left the mattress and grasped onto his shoulder instead, digging her nails into him with every movement that brought her closer to the edge. “’m gonna cum- oh, fuck! ‘m c’mming!”
He tightened the circular motion of his thumb on her clit and pressed harder. “Yeah, sweetheart? Cum for me, darling- fuck!”
Arching her back off the bed, she came with a cry of his name and subconsciously clenched her walls around his cock. The added pressure added more pleasure and his speed faltered as he was brought nearer towards his own orgasm. He held it back and maintained his thrusts as best he could to help her ride out her orgasm and only gave in once she started cursing in oversensitivity. “Fuckfuckfuckfuck- fuck! ‘s too much-”
“Shit- Vina!”
He groaned lowly at his final thrust and kept his hips glued against hers as he unloaded himself in her. The feeling of warm liquid spurting out of him drew a long moan out of her and she eased her grip on him. He gave two more short thrusts to milk himself fully before pulling out of her with a grunt, watching as the mixture of their cum dribbled out of her spent cunt and joining the pool of her liquid underneath.
Leaning forwards to connect their lips in a lazy kiss, he brushed her hair away from her face and surveyed her expression worriedly. “You feeling alright, lov’ie?”
“Mhm…”
She pulled his head nearer for another kiss and he smiled into it when she wouldn’t let go. “H’v to clean you up, lov’ie.”
“’Kay…”
A laugh rumbled through him when she frowned and he gave her another short kiss to appease her. “I’ll be back in a bit, yeah?”
She gave another affirmative hum and he withdrew off of her to head to the – thankfully – en suite to grab a washcloth after running it through warm water. He returned to wipe her skin clean before doing the same to the bed and floor. Rummaging through his clean clothes, he put on his boxers and passed an extra pair to her, who had regained enough will to sit up and watch as he tidied up the pile of their discarded clothes.
Once he was done with everything, she extended her arms for a hug, only to yelp in gleeful surprise when he lifted her up instead. He settled her under the duvet, switched off the lights, and slipped right beside her, her limbs instantly reaching out for him to cuddle against. They made themselves as comfortable as they could in his cot and settled down tiredly, his left arm under her head and the other thrown over her while both her arms wrapped themselves around him securely. She gave a content hum and nuzzled into his chest, finding solace in his presence.
“It wasn’t too much?”
John’s voice was quiet in the dark, seeking for an answer to nip his anxiety in the bud. He felt Levina shake her head, her matching tone weaving into the moonlight peeking through his curtains.
“It was good- better than good. ‘t was wonderful.” She pressed a kiss onto his pec reassuringly. “Thank you.”
An understanding smile crossed his lips and he similarly placed a kiss on top of her head. “Don’t have to thank me, lov’ie. I’ll always take care of you, give you all the loving that you need. I’m yours.”
He glanced down when she lifted her head. They could barely see each other but the love they shared would always glow even in the darkest of days.
“I’m yours, too, John. Always.” Her hands caressed his back in slow brushes while he brought his hand up to stroke her hair gently. “I love you.”
His lips could only reach her forehead in their position but that didn’t stop him from pouring out his affections for her with his kiss. “I love you, too, Lev.”
She hummed and returned her head to snuggle into his chest. “G’night, John.”
“Night, sweetheart.”
Their minds were quiet that night. The phantoms of their terrors steered clear of them, unable to approach the protective shield erected by their mutual love, entwined while in the presence of one another.
When they woke up the next morning, they indulged in spending a moment of domesticity in bed, kisses here and there as they merely relished in each other’s warmth. When they felt ready to start the day, Levina left, wrapped in John’s clothes, with last night’s outfit in her arms to deposit them in her laundry. Once she took a shower in the women’s common bathroom and ensured that she had covered all of John’s lovingly-placed marks splattering her skin, she left for the common room where John had been waiting with two filled cups in hand. Cuddled up together on the couch, they spent most of their available moments together in content silence, mind, soul, and body still fulfilled from last night’s act of intimacy. The flame of the barracks hearth couldn’t compare to the blazing passion crackling in their hearts for each other.
Breakfast was filled with grumblings from the hangover men, much to Levina’s amusement. John had gone ahead to settle some paperwork and had found her again in the shooting range before lunch with a message from Laswell.
“Meeting in five, you’re needed.”
“Understood, Captain.”
They were good at keeping the affections in their tone at a respectable level. Though, it was obvious that they were at least slightly fond of each other with the way John lacked a certain sharpness to his eyes that presented itself around others, and the way Levina didn’t completely stiffen up like she does with other superiors.
A friendly distance between them, they made their way to Laswell’s office. Levina narrowed her eyes in suspicion when the door opened to show Gaz, Soap, and Ghost also present; she had a feeling where this was going but quietened her thoughts to not get her hopes up. Laswell didn’t dawdle any further and opened up the meeting after Levina had paid her respects.
“Sergeant Riven, you have completed your intensive training under Lieutenant Mordell three days ago and your file has been updated with the necessary changes since then. The captains have given their consideration over your file and,” Laswell pinned Levina with a raised eyebrow, “you are fairly popular, I must say.”
Thankfully, Levina was saved from having to form a reply when Laswell continued. “I’m sure you have caught onto the reason as to why you’re here so I won’t delay any further. Sergeant Riven, meet your new team.”
Levina inwardly buzzed with exultation, careful not to let her emotions slip out too much in her small smile. She spared the team – her team – a glance and was met with a grinning Soap and a smiling Gaz while Ghost and John sent her a nod. Her heart felt heavy with the pride reflecting in their eyes and she swore to herself to never let them down even a smidge. She then turned back to Laswell who had a satisfied look on her face. “I’d say ‘I hope you get along well’ but I trust that you already do.”
Laswell went through the administrative matters for the rest of the meeting and ended on the note that they had an assignment coming up in a couple of weeks and that more would be said about it in a meeting later that week. Afterwards, as they were walking towards John’s office to discuss team norms and culture, with Soap’s arm thrown over Levina’s shoulder and Gaz on her other side as Ghost and John followed closely behind, elation and chatter high in the air, she knew she belonged.
When their assignment rolled in two months later, their immense success only proved her right. No casualties nor fatal wounds on their side, their task goal achieved, and no surprise ambushes; needless to say, they had celebrated it with a few rounds of drinks.
They had grown closer, the boys and Levina. They had come to the point that she had not hesitated to take off her top, leaving her in her modest sports bra, when it got too hot in their private sparring room. The first time that had happened, the boys had simply cheered her on with rather polite catcalls and whistles, teasing the captain when they saw that the love bites didn’t stop at her collar. John had taken all of their remarks in a stride with a proud look on his face, eyes grazing her skin all over as she laughed at the others’ comments. She had done the same when the teasing comments were aimed at her instead, that time when she had left her own marks on John and he, too, had discarded his shirt.
“You wish you had hickeys on you too,” she had retaliated, “imagine being lonely, couldn’t be me.”
The boys had not held back in sparring against her that day. Though, really, they had never limited themselves, so perhaps it was more of them going extra harsh on her. She could still feel the phantom pain of the bruise she had gotten when Gaz had flipped her over his shoulder. Ow.
Then, there was her and John. Grace, how she loved her man. They had spent more nights together following their first, mostly when the day had been particularly harsh on either one of them and they had sought the other’s comfort. Every day only pulled Levina and John deeper into their love for each other but they were still careful not to let it cloud their mind when responsibilities were heavy on their shoulders. They could switch to ‘work’ mode when they were in a professional setting, and the threat of death on-field helped prevent their affections from interfering with making rational decisions fit for a sergeant and captain respectively. It was only after their mission that they allowed themselves to express their worries and fears of losing each other as lovers, rather than soldiers.
“I won’t ask you to not make those kinds of decisions again because I know it’s your duty as a captain. So, be careful,” they had their foreheads pressed together as tears glimmered in her eyes upon remembering the close call John had experienced in the field. “Know that I’m with you, always.”
“And neither will I ever order you to stay back where it’s safe for my selfish reasons. You are a capable soldier that I, as your captain, am proud of. Keep me in your heart, always, and stay alert.”
Their unfailing understanding for each other only strengthened their love; they were confident that nothing could break it and – Grace forbids – if something tried, they would defend it to their last breaths.
As with any teams that had at least one member of each opposite sex in it, rumours circulated the compound of a possible couple within TF141. Currently, Gaz and Soap were the top contenders in being Levina’s rumoured partner with Ghost trailing not far behind. John was barely in the ranking, much to their relief, and he was only there because there were gossips of how she had slept her way into the team. Typical sexist behaviour, she had learned to ignore them the first time she had been assigned a team.
Nothing of significance occurred as months passed. They had been assigned a few missions, conquered them without major losses, and took weeks in between deployments to rest and recuperate. It was one of the latter times towards the end of the year when a momentous event rocked Levina’s world.
The team had just gotten back from their few nights long of an assignment, had been debriefed and dismissed, when Laswell called her into her office. Nervous anticipation coursed through her. The last time they had another one of these meetings, Laswell had told her that the mission to raid Griffon’s manor was to happen sometime this month. Details were understandably kept vague as the task had been assigned under the watch of another military branch more suited to the mission objectives.
Laswell had a sliver of a smile on her lips when Levina walked in. The small spark of hope in her intensified and singed her nerves. Once the salutations were given, Laswell seemed to soften and her the roughness to her voice were notably absent. “Good job on the recent assignment, Sergeant. I expect you know why I’ve called you here?”
Levina gulped, keeping her voice steady as she suggested, “to update regarding my sister’s circumstances, Ma’am.”
Laswell nodded as she rounded her desk to stand in front of Levina unobstructed. “The mission to retrieve Agustine’s victims from Jake Griffon’s manor occurred a few days ago.”
A beat.
“They have succeeded in meeting all the task objectives.”
Levina let out a heavy breath she didn’t even know she was holding. Blood thrummed in her ears and she could feel as if her guts had contracted to make space for her violently-beating heart. She bit her tongue so that her barrage of questions wouldn’t escape and gave Laswell a nod to green-light her readiness to hear more.
“They’ve had all the victims go through a mandatory checkup and Aurora has been reported to be physically well. For the healthy ones, they are now searching for any living relatives to reunite with them and bring them home.” Levina’s eyes went wide and her throat clogged up with unmistaken relief. She willed her tears to stop its production as her heart nearly burst with Laswell’s next words, “I wish you and your family a happy life, Sergeant Riven.”
Levina took a trembling breath in. “Thank you, Ma’am.”
Laswell didn’t admonish the shakiness to her tone and continued with more good news. “They’ve sent a ride to bring you to pick your sister up in their base. They’re waiting in the front gates but do take your time to prepare. I’ve signed off the two months leave that we have agreed on as preparatory measures and I’ll see you after New Year’s, Sergeant. Take care.”
Levina took one shake breath once she had left Laswell’s office.
In… Out…
And then she was rushing off to her barracks to collect her belongings. She had, thankfully, already showered and changed off into a casual training outfit so, with a quick word to her present roommates, she was out of her room in a fly. With no idea where her team were to bid goodbye, she headed straight to John’s office in hopes that he was at least there. His voice echoed through the door upon her knock and she stated her business, her smile clear in her tone. “Sergeant Riven! I have news from the chief, Captain!”
“What news do you have…” John’s words trailed off when Levina sped towards him after closing the door, forgoing any hint of propriety which told him she had come for personal business. “Love?”
She rounded his desk and he stood up to meet her concernedly, catching him in bemused surprise when she reached out to pull his head towards her in a kiss. Always a welcomed action, his hands fell on her hips as he instinctively tilted his head to press forward and she followed suit but pulled back only after a brief moment. Her words were rushed as she told him that her sister was back and that she was here to say her farewells as she’d be leaving right after. A grin had formed on his lips as she shared her elation and he cradled her cheek softly with one hand.
“Let me know once everything has calmed down, yeah? I’ll let the boys know too so don’t worry about that.”
“I will, thank you,” her voice was breathless as she caught her breath after her rushed explanation. “Need to leave now, I’ll see you soon, love.”
He gave her another quick kiss and brushed away her hair from her face. “See you soon, lov’ie. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
The ride to the other base took about an hour. Now that the confidentiality of it all had been lifted, she spent the entire ride in a call with her dad. Tears were shed and hearts were filled as she told him everything, from how she had first founded out Aurora’s fate to the reunion happening soon that they thought they could never have in their entire lifetimes. She ended up pulling her dad away from work but he insisted that his boss would understand – and, well, if they didn’t, Levina would have a couple of words to offer to his superior.
Finally, they had reached their destination. Levina followed the driver as he led her to the medical bay in the compound and left her standing in front of a private unit with a knowing sympathetic smile. Her heart was pounding like never before and she lifted a shaking fist up to rap it against the door.
“It’s unlocked!”
Oh, Grace- her voice.
It was different, yet reminiscent of the high-pitched voice she had last heard almost two decades ago. Gone, were the cheeriness and innocence of a child and in place, it was lethargic and dull, haunted by the horrors she had been forced to endure. Her heart broke at the familiar tone that resembled her own back when she had just escaped Agustine, but she was hopeful that her sister could heal – that she would heal.
Twisting the doorknob, she pushed the door open slowly and her eyes immediately fell onto the girl – the woman – sitting up on the bed, hooked onto an IV bag.
“Rory?”
The name came out trembling and airy but the woman had heard Levina, nonetheless. Levina could see the moment recognition washed over the still figure and her name left the woman’s lips in, just as, a vulnerable voice.
“Vina?”
“Oh, Rory.”
Levina barely registered herself closing the door behind her before she was beside the bed in a heartbeat. Aurora had an arm reaching out to her and she didn’t hesitate to lean down and bring her sister into a tight hug, her tears falling unrestrained.
“Vina,” Aurora was also sobbing into her shoulder, body quivering as she croaked out her name in choppy breaths. “You’re here, Oh my Grace- it’s actually you.”
“I’m here, ‘m here. You’re safe with me, it’s alright now- you’re here.”
Disbelief and reassurances were exchanged in endless watery gasps, arms remaining locked around each other for some sort of material to hold onto for support. Levina had adjusted to sit on the bed to bring Aurora closer without having to break her back and it was only when Aurora pulled away slightly did she allow herself to do so too, keeping each other in their arms.
Levina gently caressed Aurora’s cheek, eyes scouring her face to remind herself that Auora’s here, her sister was coming home. A proud smile on her face, albeit with a hint of bitterness for all the time lost, Levina’s voice was soft and loving, “you’ve grown so much, love, y’ve been so strong all this time, yeah? My sweet Aurora…”
The younger shook her head, expression pained as more tears fell. “Had to be- didn’t wanna be but had to, otherwise he’ll- I- it’s-”
Levina shushed her sister lovingly and pulled her head to her chest so that she could hold the latter in a protective hug. “It’s alright, s’alright. A lot has happened but not anymore, yeah? You don’t have to be strong alone anymore- I’m here, dad’s here. We’ll move forward together with mom watching us up above, hm?.”
She felt Aurora nod her head as her arms wrapped themselves tighter around her torso.
The staffs must’ve known of Levina’s arrival because the sisters found themselves alone long enough to calm down the best they could. Levina was now sat beside Aurora so that she could hold her sister to her chest better as she patted her head – much like how their dad had held her when she first came home after her supposed-death. They were mostly silent, save the sniffling and hitched breaths, simply revelling in each other’s missed presence after all those years of separation.
The nurse came in well over an hour later and checked Aurora off for discharge, taking off the IV still hooked onto her and giving a couple of pointers to note of to take care of the bruises littering her body. No major injuries or harm had fallen upon Aurora, physically, and Levina only felt sick when she remembered Agustine’s men’s words on how her sister had been Griffon’s favourite.
They ordered a ride back home, which meant about another hour until they finally reached home. Their dad was in when they entered their flat, having taken time off from work earlier, and they had another round of a tearful reunion in the living room.
Dinner had to be delivered when evening came and they had forgotten about it. Aurora had gone for a shower afterwards and resumed her position in her dad’s arms on the couch while Levina sat beside the pair, bringing her legs up so that she could face them and lean her side against the back of the couch comfortably. They made small talks, updating each other on what they had missed. When Levina told of her current job in the military, Aurora brought up how a soldier from her rescue team had been the first one to tell her that she had a family still.
“Said my sister was the reason why they knew where I – and the others – were in the first place. Owed it all to you, apparently? They were borderline fanboying, I’m pretty sure.”
That had led to a conversation on how Levina had gotten the knowledge of Aurora’s whereabouts in the first place. Aurora was empathetic as she listened and both women shared a mutual understanding of their past horrible circumstances.
Aurora ended up falling asleep in her dad’s embrace and they moved her to Levina’s bed carefully. They shared a brief talk on sleeping arrangements and Levina was happy to take the couch for the meantime – and ever, if she was to stay over during her leaves from the compound – but they’d see what Aurora thought about it too. Levina sent a quick text to her team to ease their worries before she headed off to sleep.
The day had felt unreal – everything had felt unreal ever since she had found out her sister was still alive. Aurora hadn’t talked much about her time in captivity, understandably so, and they would all give her the needed time and space to open up if she ever wanted to. They had set an appointment with the appropriate psychologist to help guide her healing process, however slow it may be. They were a patient bunch, a prominent trait in their lineage, and no one was going to rush Aurora and pester her with unwelcomed pressure. They’d figure things out one by one, baby steps. What mattered most was that Aurora was home and she would heal.
It was a quiet night.
ao3 🌱 topaz 🌱 masterlist
don’t steal my work, claim it as your own, upload it to another site, or use it to train AI
dividers by: @strangergraphics-archive & @saradika-graphics
#call of duty#call of duty fanfic#call of duty x oc#cod#cod fanfic#cod x oc#john price#john price fluff#john price smut#john price x oc#captain john price#captain john price fluff#captain john price smut#captain john price x oc#captain price#captain price fluff#captain price smut#captain price x oc
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My thoughts on Venom 3.
It's been a long time coming! I'm pausing my Beetlejuicy blogging tonight to talk a little bit about Venom. If you didn't know, back when Venom 2 was released, and a little bit before then, I was absolutely obsessed with Venom. More specifically, I was totally obsessed with Symbrock. (Although my love for the character of Venom has been with me since I was around 13 or 14 years old, back in the early 2000s.) So for a while, I think between 2021 and 2022, this blog was almost entirely dedicated to Symbrock (and Destiel, that one is always here). That's the reason why my blog title was originally "My Fandom and Random Blog": I hyper-fixate on whatever piece of media blows my mind. And for a good chunk of time, that was Symbrock, so I'm writing this little intro to this post because my blog is currently, predominantly, a Beetlejuice (Beetlebabes) blog. And it will continue to be for the foreseeable future.
But tonight, we go back to my previous hyper-fixation.
I have a lot of feelings about Venom 3. This post will focus on the Eddie x Venom relationship, as that's what I am most invested in. Warning: There are spoilers here.
My fresh-out-of-the-movie feeling is that I loved it, but a few things made me go "hmm..." Starting with the marketing for this movie.
I would not have expected much in the Veddie shipping department if it wasn't for the marketing. It's a superhero action movie and I know what kind of world we currently live in (plus this world isn't reading for a monsterfucker leading character like our beloved monsterfucker king Eddie Brock lol). But I noticed that a good effort was put into highlighting their relationship, not just as a friendship, but as a romance, in the marketing for this movie. There were TikTok edits and Instagram posts showing them as a romance, and the phrase "We ship Eddie and Venom" was also used (here's the Instagram post, if you don't believe me lol). What I'm getting at is that the ship was used to hype the movie. So, what was I supposed to expect? Look, there was a lot of lovely subtext between Eddie and Venom, which I loved, but it wasn't any more obvious than what we got in LTBC (in fact, maybe it was even less evident? I'll get to that in a second). So it doesn't really justify all this effort to hype up their relationship.
So, when they amped up the shipping as they marketed a movie with the slogan "'Til death do they part" (which I should mention had scenes in Vegas, notorious place for odd weddings, hello), a lot of fans (myself included) thought that something was going to happen in Vegas, if you know what I mean. Or that at least the subtext would be even more obvious. Some fans even expected another Veddie kiss scene (my expectations were more reserved, but after all that marketing I would not have been surprised to see a kiss, tbh).
I never expected to get anything overt in Venom with Symbrock, but this being the final film in the trilogy, the previous movie ending with the two of them on the run, the release of that deleted scene in which Venom is teasing Eddie about Eddie being in love with him, plus all this gay marketing? I started to expect we'd get something a little more evident, and only that is what made me feel disappointed we didn't get more. I'm sure I'd be more excited and happy with all the subtext we got in this one if it wasn't for the expectations created by the marketing, ngl.
I did cry in the scene where they were with the hippie family and Venom was talking to Eddie at night about how they'd been happier with a different kind of life. But I think I only cried because I had been spoiled about the ending. Knowing they would be separated in the end, that Venom would die, made that scene a lot more emotional and tragic, because Eddie and Venom will not have a chance at that happy and peaceful life.
And now that I brought up Venom's death, I have to say this: I really wish we could have had a couple more minutes with Eddie on that bed reflecting about his loss at the end. In the comics, whenever they are separated, usually Eddie is losing his mind, either desperate to reconnect with the symbiote, almost like an addict who's been cut off cold from his addiction (like in my favorite "The Hunger", 1996), or out of his mind in grief, feeling the symbiote still there like a phantom limb (...pretty sure this was in Donny Cates' 2018 run, but correct me if I'm wrong). What I'm getting at is that separating from the symbiote has never been easy on Eddie Brock. But, due to the constraints of movie play time I guess, he got over it seemingly very easily. Also, just an observation, the trailer featured a different take for that scene, in which Eddie says "but I need him", instead of "but I need him back". Both takes were very emotional and Tom's acting was superb, but the scene is too short. I feel like we needed a couple more minutes of mourning. Or if not minutes, then a couple of seconds of Eddie sobbing on that bed, or, I don't know, trying to get up and finding his way back to where he last saw Venom... Something more dramatic like that, is what I mean.
Eddie appeared to be more fond of Venom by the end of LTBC. Especially with comments he made earlier in this film about Venom stealing his life and being (understandably) cranky, I would have expected more grief and even regret from Eddie after losing Venom presumably forever.
About the after credit scene... I'm not sure what I'm supposed to make of it. I mean the cockroach one. One could think one of the symbiotes survived and took over the roach (hopefully Venom), but there was no indication of it; one could only assume the cockroach has a symbiote because, why even show it? Right? Now, about the Knull ending scene, was he breaking the 4th wall and telling us, the audience, that he would make us watch? Or did he say that to someone else? If there was another Venom movie or appearance after this, then I could come to the conclusion that Venom was successfully captured and taken to Klyntar, but being separated from Eddie he cannot operate as the codex anymore. <- That last bit is my own interpretation, though, and should be taken with a grain of salt.
I'm going to leave this post here. I'll write more if I feel like I have more to say (which, maybe I do, because I always do lol), but this is it for now. It was a good movie and I did like it. I do have my criticisms, but overall, they did a pretty good job and I will miss this Eddie and Venom symbiote very much. I hope we can see them again.
One note I want to leave this post with is that I'm pretty sure both Eddie Brock and the symbiote have died more than once in the comics (the most recent Eddie death was this year, btw. I'm not buying that it's permanent because in the comicverse characters die and come back all the time), but one thing will always be consistent with these two, and that is, they will always find a way back to each other. Always 🖤. So don't be sad; Venom is only gone for now.
#Venom#Venom 3#Symbrock#Veddie#things I write#my thoughts on Venom 3#Spoilers#Venom 3 spoilers#Venom spoilers#Venom the last dance
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Types of au's that i saw being made with spiderbit
- Yandere au (not to be confused with C!roier and f!cell au's very important to not conflit the two)
-Crossover with their past selfs, (chafaland!Roier and Fuga Impossível!Cell)
- Teacher and Student Father Au (most of them are cellbit as a teacher but its cute)
- Idol Au (Roier is an idol and cellbit is a person that dosent know that he is an idol or know because richarlyson is a fan)
- Undercover cop × Criminal that does ilegal races au (Shout out to fast in my car, very good fic)
- Prison au innocent × Criminal (shout out to "The Reason" really good fic, check that on out folks)
- Royal Au knight ×Prince (all of them with writters from diferent countrys have the same scene of prince!roier thirsting over a shirtless sweaty knight!cellbit that is training, its wonderful how all guapoduers have the same braincell also shout out to Amor violento wonderful fic)
- Actor × Actor Au (i found cute how the fic made ordem paranormal on of the acting Jobs of actor!cellbit)
- Coffee shop au ( Cellbit is always the coffee shop owner, its sweet)
- Alien × Human Au (both of them ware in spanish and ware really fun)
- Bad Boy × Nerd (surprising no one Cellbit was the nerd but badboyroier was funny)
- high school au (only saw some bad ooc!cellbit ones like the ones that make him a SWIFTIE but they ware fun in their own
- Soulmates that can see colors when they see their Soulmates like the bl color rush au (love this concept and shout out to acromatoforia good fic)
- The selection au (ok im cheating with this one because technically its was a slimeriana fic with spiderbit as a side couple but LET ME BE)
- Monster Hunter × Monster au (shout out to braking dawn, really good fic, its also a au that i saw in a lot of diferent version and i enjoy alot)
- Detroit Become Human Au (cc!roier played it and compared hank to cellbit so you know how the gists goes)
- Spidermen Au (i love ALL of them, they are all so fun and creative, shout out to Along Came a spider and In Evert Other Universe It Dosen't End Well, good fics)
- Flower shop au (i only saw one and it was very cute, we should do more stuff with the fact that q!cellbit loves flowes and knows the language of them)
- Ordem Paranormal Au (WE NEED MORE OF THEM ASAP)
- Spies Au (cute and fun)
- Detetive Au (surprising how little fics with this concept exist considering, cellbit is like the misterys and enigmas guy™️ but oh well)
-Time loop au (shout out to mystical time, cuttin' me open then healin' me fine, wonderful fic a must read)
- Au where q!cellbit does a ritual to bring f!cell back so he could help richas out but the ritual goes wrong and instead brings back c!roier and he has to deal with it and bring q!roier back (if i had a nickle for everytime somebody writes this plot i would have two witch is ALOT CONSIDERING THAT THIS ARE PEOPLE FROM DIFERENTE COUNTRYS THAT DONT KNOW HOW TO READ AND EACH OTHERS NATIVE LANGUAGES)
- genderbend au Melissa× Selma (unfortunaly i only saw one fic of the two and it was one of them dead lol)
- f1 Racer × Singer (it was a cool fic, just not my taste)
Thats not everything but i just wanted to show how creative the fandom is and show my surprise of how versatile spiderbit is lol
#qsmp#qsmp fanfics#qsmp fanfic#qsmp fanfiction#cellbit#roier#qsmp cellbit#qsmp roier#cellbit qsmp#roier qsmp#q!cellbit#q!roier#spiderbit#guapoduo#guapo duo
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So Damn Pretty
Chapter 10
Part 9 : Part 11
Pairing: Johnny Slaughter X Female Reader
Summary: Johnny is sex starved and you’re very attractive, so attractive that he doesn’t want to kill you. Instead he finds ways to keep you around longer.
Note: The story is coming closer to completion but that’s okey cause I’m gonna be in this fandom forever even if it has died a little lol. I’ve got plenty of Johnny fics planned :3. This chapter is for those who have been so patient! Love you all😘
Warning: This is 18+ and please do not read if your sensitive to heavy descriptions of non/con and violence. Including bondage, blood, gore, assault, objectification and unsafe sex. For those who don’t mind, I hope you enjoy.
I stare vacantly at the couple of eggs on my plate, not feeling hungry for them. I sink further into my seat and take a glance over at Johnny. Its just him and me sitting at the dining table; the rest of the family have already finished up their breakfast, but it seems he has an appetite this morning, digging in his second plate of crispy bacon. I look back at the two eggs; things in pairs have been bothering me lately. It seems my mind still can't get over those two girls. I thought I would be over it; at the time, it didn’t bother me, but the guilt comes in waves. Crashing heavily against my consciousness. I try to keep it down, not letting it depress me. I've gained trust from the family, and I don’t want to ruin it with my emotions.
With their trust comes more leniency. So much so that Drayton brings me along to the gas station, helping him out with whatever he tasks me with.
A surprising amount of locals come by. They didn’t question me; they just went about their own business. I didn't know how to go about it. I guess no one back home really cares that I'm missing. Even though I'm somewhat content with my current situation, I can't help but feel sad. No one bothered at all to look for me. I know I didn't have much family, but Nate and Jessica sure did; both came from big families. There should be people searching for them.
I quickly moved on from those thoughts, especially now that it's too late to go back. It's easier to just focus on other things. Even if there isn't much to focus on,.
At least today I can spend the rest of my time with Johnny out in the field. I love keeping him company while he works on the cars, and sometimes I help out by passing him tools or handing him a rag.
I glance over at him again while I smoosh around my runny eggs with my fork. He shoots me a small grin. I was going to smile softly back at him until a sudden shot of nausea hit me. Instead, I must have given him an ugly face because he looked at me with a raised brow.
Salvia starts poring up into my mouth, and with panic, I sit up, making the chair scratch on the floor, and bolt past Johnny to the front door, slamming it open. No longer able to hold it down, I grip the veranda's handrails tightly, lean over, and vomit my breakfast onto the poor bushes below.
"Ya' alright, darlin'?" Johnny asks as he walks up behind me, confused. He sees what is happening and places a large hand on my back and rubs it in soft circles while I spew out misery. Thinking I was finished, I turned around to face him, smiling wearily, but a second punch of nausea came flying in, and I turned back to vomit in the bushes again.
“I’ll go get Sissy.” He says this, grimacing at the sight of me puking, unsure of what to do.
He leaves, and in a quick minute, a concerned Sissy comes with a damp hand towel, and she guides me to take a seat on the white bench, dabbing my forehead while I try not to throw up straight bile.
"Oh, pumpkin, this is not good," Sissy worries, still wiping my face. Johnny comes back outside, also looking concerned.
“Take her to the living room, Johnny; she needs to lay down.” Sissy tells him, feeling my forehead and checking for my temperature. I’m not sure if I’m sick; I don’t feel hot.
Johnny, grumbling at being told what to do, still picks me up bridal style, carrying me effortlessly to the living room, and lays me down gently on the cowhide-covered couch.
“What’s wrong with her?” Johnny asks, turning to Sissy, wanting an answer to my sudden sickness. She places an old, rusty bucket down next to me, just in case I get sick again.
"Well, she ain’t burnin' up. Maybe it’s something she ate.” She’s replies are also confused about my sudden sickness.
I lay there on the couch, trying to keep whatever wants to come up down while Sissy and Johnny keep me company for a bit. It’s comforting to see how much they seem to care for me. However, after under an hour of resting and sipping on some water, I feel much better.
“I'm feeling better.” I said this to both of them, who looked surprised and relieved about my comeback.
“Somethin' must've upset ya' then.” She reasons. With that little incident over with, the rest of the day goes by as normal without any sign of sickness. It must have been something I ate.
That’s what I believed until the very next morning, and then the next thing happened on the third day. Sissy keeps my hair away from my face while rubbing my back.
It's another morning, and I'm back outside vomiting; it seems to be my usual puke spot outside on the veranda.
I know I've made everyone else concerned now. I can hear Nubbins questioning Johnny about why I'm throwing up so much. But he wouldn't get a solid answer from him, as he is just as clueless about my ongoing vomiting. I don’t understand either; at first, I thought I was dying, but what Sissy came up with seemed worse than dying. Her sweet voice contradicts the heavy words coming out of her mouth. I feel like I've been strapped to an anchor, and it's dragging me down, deep below.
“I think you may be pregnant, sugar; you ain’t got no fever, and sure, dang, know Johnny hasn’t been innocent with you." She explains smoothing my messy hair.
Now I feel like I’m really drowning. Oh, my good I’m pregnant, oh fucking hell. It explains everything: the weight gain, my emotions playing up, and of course the morning sickness. My legs start to wobble. Holy shit, I’m pregnant with Johnny’s baby.
Sissy notices my shaky form and decides to help me back inside. Holding my arms steady, she shuts the door behind us with her foot while leading me to the sofa. As I sit, she’s skipped off to grab a glass of lemonade while I try to calm down. Just as quickly as she left, she came back with a glass of delicious cold lemonade. Sissy places the drink in my shaky hands as I take a sip. Its sweet yet bitter flavour soothes me.
“When I was in California, some of her sisters from the ranch always threw up every morning when they were pregnant. It's called morning sickness, and it's always a telltale sign that you're going to have a baby.” She explains joyfully, sitting down right next to me and giving me an excited hug.
She then claps her hands together cheerfully. "Oh, how joyous a little baby!" She throws her thin arms around me again in another big hug while I sit frozen, completely gobsmacked by the revelation that I'm pregnant. I guess I must have forgotten how babies were made while I’ve been here; Johnny and I have been going at it enough. There is no denying that.
I placed my lemonade down on the coffee table and placed a hand over my belly. Johnny's baby is growing inside me and will later give birth to his baby.
Sissy stands back up, going over to a sleeping grandpa. I didn't realise he was there. But Sissy, with all her excitement, accidentally woke him up, to which she apologised by telling him about the new member of the family and how he’s going to be a grandpa again. How many generations old is this baby going to make grandpa? I wonder.
Grandpa Sawyer just let out these wistful groans in reply. Sissy explains that he’s excited for a new grandchild. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to understand him.
Then Johnny comes stomping in, shirtless and sweaty from being outside in the Texas heat. "What’s all the squealing you’re making? I can hear it from outside." He asks, annoyed.
I would've hoped Sissy would keep my pregnancy to herself until I was ready to tell her, but instead she just blatantly spills out to him that I'm pregnant.
“Bout’ time.” He says plainly, I gap at his laid-back attitude on this situation. He turns to my surprised face, and he smirks. He inches closer, bending down so his face is in front of mine.
“I told ya I wanted to be a dad, didn’t I? It’s why I've been working so hard on you.” His smirk widens as my face flushes red in embarrassment. Have I been baby trapped?
The day goes by like usual, even though I'm an emotional, vomiting mess. Now during dinner, and for some odd reason, I never get sick eating supper. The smell of any other food makes me queasy, except cooked meat. My mouth starts to drool when I smell it being cooked. Just barely being able to keep anything else down has made me famished, and tonight, Drayton's chilli has never tasted better. Going in for seconds and now thirds.
“I should've made extra batches just for the way you eat, girl.” Drayton commented, slightly impressed with how much I can put down.
“It’s just so good.” I moan out with a mouthful of chilli.
“It's better than good; it's the best chilli in the whole damn county.” Cook proudly states, sitting up a bit straighter.
“Oh god, enough of the chilli talk.” Johnny groans out, already frustrated with the conversation.
“Y-yeah enough!” Nubbins joins in, trying to entice a fight.
"Oh, shut it; look at the girl; she loves it.” He points over to me, still stuffing my face with utter pleasure.
“No more of this arguing! Y/N is in a delicate situation, and I want none of ya' messing that up!” Sissy puts her bit in, not wanting to be left out of the conversation. Ironically, this is her way of enticing an argument.
“What delicate situation, girl? She's just hungry.” Drayton asks, confused by Sissy’s words.
“She’s pregnant, and ya' can't do anything about' it.” Sissy again spills the beans on my pregnancy, but now to the rest of the family.
I look over at Johnny puasing my eating to see his reaction to Sissy not being able to keep anything to herself. “They'll find out sooner or later.” He just sinks further back into the chair, crossing his muscular arms under his chest, waiting for the onslaught of words from Drayton.
Bubba, who is next to me, is the first to react. He places his large hand on top of his head and pats it, like if I were a puppy. He groans gleefully, I guess, letting me know that he is happy with the new addition. He can be a real gentle giant when there isn't anyone to murder.
Cook has gone absolutely red as a tomato, while nubbins start snickering. "Oooh, J-Johnny, I-I-is in trouble.” It seems the night has gone his way for wanting drama.
"God, Damnit, boy, I knew this would happen. You can’t control yourself, can you? Always chasing tail, and now a baby.” Drayton stood up at the start of his rant but now has sat down, looking almost deafted.
“Your mother will go ballistic once she finds out.” Drayton points his finger at Johnny, warning him.
“Shut it, old man! You got nothing to worry about; it’s bout time; we’re all getting old, and we gotta keep the family going.” He counters Drayton's words.
It looked like Nubbins wanted to say more, but with Johnny quickly standing up and leaving, it was pointless.
Dinner practically finished up after that fight, and I just sat there silently, not sure what to do. I was supposed to help clean up, but I sneakily decided to go find Johnny. Anyway, with all the commotion still going on with Nubbins and Sissy messing with Drayton, it’s best I stay away.
I check the front veranda; Johnny has a few smoke spots he always goes to: the front, the back garden, and his shed. But luckily, my first guess was right, as I found him sitting on the outdoor bench. While walking to him, he quickly puts on his smoke, squishing it under his boot. “Shouldn’t smoke around you anymore.” He grins at me, and just as I take a seat, he places his warm hand on my stomach.
“The second I saw you, I knew you were the perfect girl to have my kid. So fucking pretty, I'm going to look after the both of you, I promise.”
His words send tingles all throughout your body; it’s electrifying. You place your hand over his, smiling back at him.
“Soon you’re going to get real big, darlin’; ya tits are going to get nice and fat too.” He teases with humour, but a familiar, hungry look starts building in his eyes.
As he inches closer to me, his large hand moves away from mine and glides up, grabbing a breast. He squeezes it firmly before starting to massage it. His warm breath is on my neck as he kisses right below my jaw. Wetness begins to pool in my panties.
“Run up the stairs to your room and undress before I take you right here.” As much as I wanted to tease him, it’s better to listen, or he really would take me here, in any position too. He gets very creative when he's horny.
I get up and leave, going to my room just as instructed. I closed the door behind me and set myself on the bed to undress. I wore a blue sundress today, so I just unzipped the side and let it slip right off. Leaving me in my white panties. Even though it didn’t take me long to undress, it wasn't quick enough for Johnny. He was already here, striding in and locking the door behind him, already semi-undressed too.
“Come on, darlin', only your panties left to go; take em off for me.” I happily obliged, hooking my fingers into the side, purposefully bending over, and sliding them down.
I look back to see the bulge in his jeans while he takes them off. Now he is just as naked as me. I will never get tired of looking at his body. His large muscles, pecs, sprinkled on chest hair leading down to his happy trail—the sight of his scars always makes me throb. Fuck, he is gorgeous.
With my ogling, I fail to notice him getting closer. Wrapping his large arms around me, he whispers into my ear, “I want you to take a seat on my face while keeping your mouth busy with my cock.” He groans before going to lay down on the bed. This is a new position, and with only a little hesation, I gingerly climb over him, placing my legs on the side of his head. Before I sink down, he grabs my hips roughly, bringing my swollen heat to his mouth.
I gasp as his tongue slides back and forth over my clit. I lean further down, grinding my wetness along his mouth needing more. His impressive cock, comes into view, precum leaking out; it’s red and aching to be sucked.
I lick his tip timidly before taking his whole length, making a sloppy mess while focusing on his head, I hear him groan as I go deeper. His grunting sends small, delightful vibrations along my clit.
My muffled moans fill the room as he holds me in place, my aching pussy being devoured while I simultaneously suck off Johnny. I hallow out my cheeks, pinch my lips, and let my tongue slide along his shaft. Working extra hard to get him to finish first.
It's difficult; he knows exactly how to get me off. He knows where I'm most sensitive and what feels best. My plans to make him cum first are starting to falter; I'm struggling to even keep myself steady. I put my tired arms on top of his muscular thighs, giving them a rest. I take a deep breath and continue to encompass his cock, swirling my tongue along the base. I’m a little sloppy with the rhythm now, but I don’t think he cares.
I can feel my orgasm building as Johnny doesn’t even stop for air, still sucking and licking my clit with undying hunger. His grip on my hips still remains strong, making me unable to pull away.
My limbs are starting to become sore. Needing him to finish, I start sucking his cock faster, my salvia drenching him, making it easier for it to slide along my tongue. My moans turn to whines as my own orgasm is right on the edge.
I feel him twitch in my mouth while his groans continue from below. "Fuck, I’m gonna cum." I choked out, stopping to take a deep breath.
Johnny slides his hands along my thighs as his tongue stays strong, massaging my clit, while keeping a steady pace.
I take his throbbing length back into my mouth right before my orgasm hits. The force of it makes my legs turn to jelly while I moan incoherently around him. I try to move away, my clit becoming increasingly sensative, but his hands grip back to my hips, holding me captive while he moves his hot tongue in my cunt, licking up my juices as he thrusts himself deeper down my throat. Not letting me until he cums.
I’m a whimpering mess; my thighs squeeze his face while I lick and sucking, getting him closer so my poor pussy can have a break.
My efforts were deemed successful as his cock started to twitch and stiffen. With my last lick, he spills himself. He groans as his cock pulsates while I swallow his whole load. With revenge, I continue to suck him, knowing he's going sensitive. He hisses and quickly pulls me off.
“Naughty girl,” he chuckles, slapping my ass hard.
I yelp from the harsh slap and roll my body to the side, recovering from the intense orgasm. Johnny, too, lays still panting. I move up and lay my head on his chest. He throws an arm around me as we both relax into each other.
Before I knew it, I'd fallen asleep on his chest.
It's in the middle of the night that I wake up to long, thick fingers inside me, thrusting in and out slowly.
“You awake, baby?” Johnny asks, now teasing my hard clit with his thumb. I moan out in response, gripping the bedsheets.
"Yeah, does that feel good?" His whispers, his face moving into the crook of my neck, his hardness pressing up against me.
"Ah-ah.” I try to say yes, but it’s morphed into moans.
“Fuck, your tight baby girl, gonna' feel so good when I put it in. He groans while I spread my legs further apart from his words. I'm going to cum soon with the way he’s going.
Instead, he pulls his fingers back, slides over on top, and plunges his hard cock inside me. He slips his wet fingers into his mouth, tasting myself, while his cock goes further deep inside.
I groan out while he stretches me. A mixture of sleepiness and arousal makes me clench around him. Johnny, in turn, pulls out his fingers, replacing them with his tongue and pushing it into my accepting mouth as he starts a fast rhythm, pounding into me.
All noise is blocked out, except for my moans and the slapping sound of his cock fucking in and out of my sopping hole.
“I'm going to keep you on my cock forever.” He groans into my ear, grabbing onto my swinging chest. Groping the fatty flesh.
I whimper at the thought of being his cock slave, as if I weren’t already.
He sits up, holding my hips tightly in one hand, and as the other goes to rub my clit, I hold my tits, stopping their swinging from his hard thrusts.
“I'm going to be full of milk soon.” I moan out, teasing him, thrusting back against his cock. I felt his cock twitch as he groans, knowing he's imaging my tits spilling milk. The hand that was squeezing my hip goes to squish a boob, swatting my hand away and pinching the nipple.
I throw my head back in ecstasy and wrap my legs around Johnny’s waist, getting closer to my second orgasm of the night.
“Ya' gonna' cum on my cock, sweetheart?” He teases, rubbing my clit achingly slow.
I whine as he also starts to stop his thrusting, keeping me on edge. Repeatedly pulling himself fully out of my cunt and slowly pushing back in.
Not giving in to his teasing, Johnny takes his cock and starts jerking it, leaving me feeling empty and frustrated.
“Use your words, darlin'.” He groans out, now stopping his rubbing on my clit, only focusing on getting himself off.
“Please! Please, I want to cum.” I moan wantonly, fucking desperate for him to continue.
It’s not enough; he is still waiting.
“please daddy.” I moan, testing out a new nickname.
It does the trick as he groans deeply, gliding his hardness back inside me and thrusting away.
Relief floods me when his cock goes back into my aching heat. I’m so close to finishing.
“I-I-I’m cumming!” I cry out as my pussy squeezes him tightly. My orgasm sends Johnny over the edge as he cums just as quickly inside me.
“Fuck yeah, baby, cum on daddy’s cock.” He moans out, shoving himself deeper.
I whimper from the overly sensative feeling of being filled and having two orgasms in a short amount of time.
It’s been a few weeks, and my bump has become more visible. It seems each day I just keep getting bigger and bigger. It does help my confidence that Johnny just can’t seem to keep his hands off me since I’ve become pregnant. It’s like the animal inside of him has changed. Becoming more protective and sex-hungry.
I won’t lie. Being pregnant has been a nice change; I’m doing less labour. Sissy considers me too delicate, and she doesn't want to stress the baby. Drayton has even been forcing Nubbins to actually clean up the messes he makes; he didn’t listen until Sissy and Johnny got on his ass about it too. Three against one, it took him to actually listen. It’s mainly bone scraps he leaves around, always making new traps. He even showed me how he makes him; it was impressive, especially how well they worked on the animals nearby. He explains that it was Grandpa who taught him everything he knows, from killing, slicing, and cleaning his blade, "back when Grandpa was still in his killing form." He told me enthusiastically.
It’s hard to picture Grandpa in his so-called 'killing form', even if it was years ago. He's just so old and motionless, but with the way he enjoys his blood, I can understand that he may have been more ruthless than anyone here.
Having less work has made me bored, only spending time in the lounge. I’ve been trying to find my stuff to do. I have no more clothes to patch up or anything to make. And I’ve cleaned so much that there is barely anything else to clean. I need to find something to do before I go crazy.
Johnny has noticed me being a little slumped, so he decided to bring inside some dead rabbits and teach me how to skin them. How lovey. Though it did cure my boredom, even if it was gross, and he did a much better job than me, he made it look so effortless. It was like it was his thousandth time doing it. Unfortunately, it probably was. During my time here, I learned that Johnny is an efficient hunter. The skulls of the animals and other people he killed are used as decorations in the house.
Those rabbits that we skinned went into a crockpot meal with mashed potatoe; Sissy made it with a bunch of herbs and veggies from her greenhouse. You can't get this type of fresh food in the city. Not including people.
I decided to try and work on my baking skills, asking Drayton if he could bring back some condensed milk so I could try to make some caramel fudge. He agreed; we already have butter and sugar, so it wasn't too much of an ask, and let’s just say my caramel fudge was a hit. Everyone has a surprising sweet tooth. Maybe not too surprising, as the pantry was stocked with tubs of chocolate drink powder.
So now during the day, to help my boredom, I've been baking treats and deserts, and it's nice that everyone likes my baking. Even Johnny, who seemed like someone who hates sugar, eats up the sweets much like everyone else. Sissy always gets excited to see what I've made for dessert. She tells me it's become her favourite part of the day.
Time goes by, and so I get even bigger. Including my chest, I think it's doubled in size; it’s embarrassing how big I’m getting. It doesn’t help that Nubbins snickers around me, poking fun at the size of his chest; he called me a cow one day, and sweet Bubba, who would do anything for his family, smacked Nubbins really hard on the back, making the lanky man tumble embarrassingly forward on the ground. which I've believed humbled him, as I got no more teasing after that.
Some of the spare clothes I’ve had that were modest are now very form-fitting and showy, just because of my growing size. Thankfully, there are old male button-up shirts that I can use to give myself some dignity.
I don't even know why I worry about my dignity when I let Johnny strip me naked and put me in compromising positions. Thanks to my growing breasts, Johnny couldn’t seem to hold himself back, and now we've been fucking everywhere, more than before.
One moment I’m relaxing outside in the middle of the day, the next I’m nude, riding his cock on the old, ripped-out car seats out back near his shed. I have to hold on to his shoulders tightly because he's making me go. Moving me up and down. He does it purposefully because he likes watching my tits bounce.
Being pregnant has made everything more sensitive. So when he places his mouth over my nipple and pinches the other, I almost cum. At least fucking outside, I get to be loud. I just hope no one is watching.
But as I get closer to cumming, the less I care if anyone can see. I’m enjoying myself. So I throw my head back, and I grind down on Johnny while I peak. Milking his cock through my orgasm, he squeezes my chest, holds me down tightly, and fills me up with his hot cum.
Just as my chest grows, so does my ass, so a day later I’m on all fours, holding the headboard for dear life, trying to keep my moans low as Johnny slams into me from behind. He smacks my ass as I thrust back onto him. He grips the fat hard. Making sure this time I finish from his cock alone. Just as I came, he pulls out and pumps himself until he shoots his load over my clit and pussy, making a mess. He reasons that since I'm pregnant, he can decorate me with his cum. He's especially loves shooting his cum over my face and chest. It's nice that he makes sure I have an orgasm right before he does.
Yes, all my assets may be growing; but most importantly, my stomach is too, With the baby getting bigger, Johnny's softer side comes out.
So now he has a pillow under my hips while he slowly ruts his cock while softly sucking my nipple. He slides his hand over my body, feeling all the curves. He slides his hands down and up my leg till he brings it over to my clit, rubbing it in delicate circles. I groan; going slow is new, but fuck, it still feels good to get pampered like this.
“We’re not fucking like this all the time, are we?” I'm still addicted to the hard and fast fucking Johnny is known for.
"Nah, Darlin, I just like the way you glow tonight and want it slow.” He says this while ironically speeding up, causing me to whimper.
As my orgasm gets closer, I hold his face in my hands and stare into his handsome eyes. “I love you, Johnny.” I pant out as I cum around him.
“I love you too, doll,” he responds, filling me up with his cum and kissing me hard.
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