#there was a mistake before i think because we didnt find out about coupling songs
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"FAITH" - a song by ALI written about Getou Suguru
ALI's singer Leo, the band behind Lost in Paradise (JJK ss1's ED), had tweeted once about how much he loves Getou and made a song for him during JJK ss1's airing
I really love Getou [...] I made this with the image of Getou in mind
(fyi: Getou in JPese literally translates as "summer oil")
The song mentioned is a "coupling" song (also known as a sidetrack) to his album Lost In Paradise, and the title is "Faith". The people mentioned in his tweet is also mentioned in the song title.
youtube
And wow does that song tell you so much about Geto Suguru.
Using gg translate, let's find out some part of the lyrics because it's making me FEEL (and keep in mind that this song is written about Getou):
I have??? no idea what to think when I read this because who did Getou meet at the end????
And this part, I can't help but be reminded to Gojou and Getou's encounter in JJK0 because though being an enemy, Gojou keeps on dragging out Getou's execution, even though he can easily do it himself. And Getou knows that. He knows Gojou held back in the past and is holding back still, so he took his move to end it once and for all. So it doesn't have to drag on past those 10 years.
This can be interpret in different ways I think?? i thought about Gojou and I also thought about the people Getou saved, who had been being mistreated and tortured. He's willing to go against the world to save them and that's what he did.
I wish I can understand more with all these imageries... about the red sky painted blue, which is probably related to the sunrise in the next sentence. But the sunrise has been sort of an image of hope and a new better day. So it could mean about a "better future" for the sorcerers, one that both of them are pursuing, albeit in different approaches.
this part kinda reminds me so much of Getou :') how he kept going with his crazy ideals and didn't give up till the end. Even though it's a result of his twisted mind, twisted love and care for fellow sorcerers. It is why his name is like that - "summer oil" - burning passionate during summer.
Ahhhh.... this part.... that's what he is right now, being used by Kenjaku, and his conciousness trapped inside like a cage... :((( And "holding a poisoned apple" is like holding that trick to push Gojou into the trap...
This sentence shocks me the most. Now i know Leo wrote the song for Getou during ss1 airing and can't possibly know the current events in the manga. But be what it may... it's like a prophecy. How Getou's death anniversary is such an important milestone of the manga. And "blamed for a mistake in justice"?? Some people might argue, but this is Leo writing about Getou, and he obviously has some type of opinion about him, and it's different from general readers.
Sorry I keep relating this to Gojou but I can't help it... because Gojou is the one who set the final "showdown" date because he doesn't want Getou to have 2 death anniversaries.
In the end, I love how much love Getou receives from Japanese pp. From Leo, and he is Bleach's author Tite's favorite character in JJK too. Because they're so easy to sympathize to them, his breakdown is all too real. And having a whole song dedicated to him is an honor indeed :')
#geto suguru#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#my collection#ali#Youtube#there was a mistake before i think because we didnt find out about coupling songs#so we mistook it to LIP but this song honestly reminds me of him better#personal
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When people say to me âwhat about your future?â I tell them thats exactly who im doing all this for
âAll of the best things in my life have occurred when things in my life didnât go to planâ
âOnly thing that changed in eight years is haircuts and excusesâ
I want everyone to ask and care but i dont want to talk about it either
Failed with flying colors
Home feels like lame familiarity
âYouâve gotta be my stability!â
âI cant cos im on a BAR STOOLâ
The years are passing me by faster than I care to admit.
Turns out making good use of your 20s doesnât do an awful lot to slow them down.
Iâm living a life I thought I wanted and still I feel a divide between what I thought I wanted and how I thought I would feel. Maybe this isnât all that I hoped it would be. Maybe im not alive enough to make it feel good enough. Maybe just prioritizing fun isnt gonna cut it. But definitely prioritizing stability wont.
Maybe we just donât have enough years on this earth and space in our brains to feel like we can really live anything to completion.
All I know right now is that on this warm, still summers evening, with a beautiful light in the sky, on a night I should be thoroughly captivated by, i feel unamused and alone.
Iâve seen this before.
Iâm stuck with myself in a place i know all too well and not a great many people left to meet
âI have one foot in the door and the other going in a direction i dont quite know yetâ
âIf you can read this, i hope you have health insuranceâ
Never have i ever been in a rush to go to sñeep before
19 year old w 5 years practice
I dont believe in being nice i believe in being kind
âWell, money where your mouth is? I liked you.â
âYeah but Iâve changed since i said thatâ
Well where too from here
Still tiptoeing around and dancing away
Trying to see where we stand in each otherâs lives
Am i all wrong?
Did i read too far into all the songs in the playlist?
Or all the stories we told each other?
All the memories we shared?
And all the fun we made.
How about all the time we spent on each other or all the thoughts spent?
All the dreams made and all the hopes held.
All that you said that i read into, cannot be a mistake. Youâre too clever for that. Did you want me to say it? Were you waiting for it? Did you want it? You sure werent surprised by it.
God i hope i didnt ruin it.
Maybe youre right
Maybe finding your person is long term task
Maybe all those journal entries, nights drinking together and nights thinking of you were to hit a realization.
Maybe the realization is that i need therapy
Maybe its that weâre not compatible
Maybe we need more time.
Either way, i know im here for it
Way too much love for the woman who raosed me and her never ending kindness and innocence despite the shit sheâs had to deal with. Somehow coupled with a complete lack pf jealousy.
Im quite sick of the world
Im not very fond of myself in it either
I think every minute of every day what am i doing here? Why am i here?
I dont feel comfortable in myself
I dont feel confident in myself
I dont like the state of the world when i observe it
I feel powerless to change it
I feel like a fool for never having tried
I tell myself all the things my dear sweet friends would tell me in this situation
I know that im giving myself too much grace
Im not a dipshit
But i made myself into one
And ill die that way. Whenever I get too sick of it
What a damn shame it is to know a good moments passed you.
To have only the half remembered memories because you didnât realize at the time that this would be a moment youâd want to think about forever.
Iâve left little pieces of my heart across the globe. From Oaxaca to West Aus to New York to Ningaloo, traces of my soul can be found sprinkled in pockets around taco stands, strangers vans and gorgeous country under shining stars.
I can never get them back.
Nor do I want them.
But I fear ill never approach life in one place with the same zest and enthusiasm as I used to.
A wise man once said itâs important to know when youâre living in a moment youâll want to remember. I think itâs important to know when youâre shaving a piece of your heart and leaving it somewhere with someone as well
I donât tend to think of it as âlearning about myselfâ anymore. I think after a few seasons worth of reinventing myself, it feels a little bit more like reinventing the next iteration of myself. A both tiring and exciting endeavor indeed.
âDo you miss NYâ
âMmmmm sometimes â
What a fkn lie. Every day, most hours, in truth
I dont feel like myself
The aussie accent
The blokey chat
The blending in
None of its me, really.
I need stress to stay awake despite wht its doing to me
Do i want to look at the city on my drive in and think âhell yeahâ orâahhhhhh fuckâ
Either is an investment of time n energy and i have to pick
You can observe in many colonized countries today what i see in myself.
When you take away peoples connection to identity, language, customs and place, they will frequently stumble around somewhat aimlessly with a penchant for extra curriculars
âIts only racist if im not funnyâ
âTheres something to be said about a life well fucked around â
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Do you write yandere? If so, can I request skz yandere headcanons on how they would react when S/O rejects them because she doesn't wanna deal with whole drama that would come with dating an idol?
i mean kinda?? i have a seungmin yandere fic in my drafts sooo BUT YEAH
oh also, requests are not open but im just gonna do this one cause headcanons are kinda fun BUT REQUESTS ARE CLOSED <33
also why is the felix one so short-
Warnings; yandere!skz, rejection, k-dnapping, slight gaslightning or like manipulation, restraints, threats, aggression, mentions of masturbation, stockholm syndrome
Chan
nobody rejects him. nobody.
you two were friends from school and you were sooo happy when chan made it as an idol, finally persuing the dream he had been yapping on about for years.Â
but in the midst of that he realized that he had feelings for you, he missed you all the time, just wanting to hang out with you and maybe explore the things he had on his mind. so,, he decided to confess when you guys were at a cafe.
âlook y/n,,, thereâs something I wanna tell youâ he started to which you tilted your head
ânooo,,, are you guys going on a tour again,,, i wil miss you sooo much channieâ you said with a pout but the boy shook his head.
âi like you y/nâÂ
your mouth stood agape, this was not what you expected and truthfully,,, not what you wanted.Â
âchan,,, y-you know thats not possibleâ you said with a frown, looking at him straight ahead.
âof course it is,,, why wouldnât it be? w-what are you trying to say y/n?!â his voice started growing louder, you looking around in order to see that people werent turning their heads towards your table.Â
Minho
you have made a big big mistake my friend-Â
wont even hesitate to keep you hostage in his basement LIKE IM NOT JOKING-
might just tie you up and like,,, not even do anything to you, just talk to you and admire you, maybe tracing your facial features and cuddle closer on the cold floor
just wants to keep you as a pet or smth and you are scared out of your mind cause you cant move cause of the restraints, you cant speak because you have silvertape across your lips that he only removes to feed you but if you start screaming you wont get any so you deicde to just stay calm and quiet before someone saves you and play along.Â
i mean you do,,, kinda fall for him but you know you cant,, but you cant help but to fall for him and miss him whenever heâs out on schedule things
he always returns to you and you get so happy when you see the little crevice of light from outside when he opened the basement door
whenever he lies next to you, you put your head against his shoulder and take in his scent the best you can
he told you everyday that he would let you go if you agreed to date him but you shook your head,, maybe cause you liked being his prey.Â
Changbin
heâs more of the threatening type of yandere,,, like,, not that heâs violent but if you try to block his number he will create new ones and keep on sending you messages about how you have betrayed him and how he wished that you loved him back and all that,,,,
you guys often meet because you go to the same college and are students in the same department sooo,,,, avoiding him is pretty impossibleÂ
he stares a lot at you,,, you guys have a couple of classes together and he just stares the entire time, his eyes are just filled with revenge, he somehow wants you make you his, own you but he doesnt know how yet, for now he can just look.
watch this fucking message conversation just be this;
[why did you talk to him during class?]
[you could have just asked me]
[nobody loves you like i do. no one y/n]
you are never getting rid of him basically,,
heâs gonna get to you first ;))
Hyunjin
i feel like he goes more to the stalking route than the kidnapping and drugging and whatnot-Â
ok,,, you rejected him,,, but that doesnt mean youâre getting rid of him.
ohmygod what if he turns into a peeping tom- cause he obviously knows where you live.Â
like yall were not even that close?? he just saw you backstage at one of the concerts and thought you looked good so he decided to go up to, you werent an idol so no problem he thought.
but he gets a bit too,, hasty with his decisions and often falls for people randomly and so when he politely greeted you and gave you his number you simply shook your head, explaining that this wouldnât be possible since you worked in the same industry and you needed to stay clear out of any scandals in order to keep your job.Â
no was not answer in Hyunjins mind.Â
luckily he managed to catch your full name by flickering through some papers in an office and also saw your full adress there, knowing exactly what he was going to do on his free time.Â
Jisung
if im being completely honest,,, i have no idea-
like,,, he gives me kinda pervy yandere vibes,,,
what if youre like his ex before he became an idol and now he wants to get back together with you-
oh,,, he masturbates to your pictures-
i feel like he always thinks about you, wondering what you like and wants to write songs about you but he doesnt do much-
but when he finds out that you have been hired by the same company as him to work as a like,,, economics accountant thingy he is all of a sudden vEEERY interested-
always asking the manager of when the group will have meetings with the accounting team,,, although they had nothing to do with them-
he just wanted to be in a conference room with you (and think pervy things about you in your tight office skirt and white blouse)
you went to the toilet on day and you saw him lurking around the same floor,,, WHICH ONCE AGAIN WAS NOT CONNECTED TO THE GROUP AT ALL-Â
and idk,,, probably sneaks in with you and locks the door before you even react that theres someone else in the toilet-Â
i feel like heâs pretty mild,,, but when heâs alone with you he is aggressive broooo
probably pins you to the wall and threatens you or smth along those lines,,,,,
(writing this is what my life has become to-)
Felix
âwhat do you think youâre doing?â
you turn around again, you had just thought of just leaving with a vague answer to his question but he was not having it.Â
âanswer.âÂ
his words sounded cold, his dark voice making an entrace, the exact one youâve heard on many of the songs you listened to.
âfelix,,, you have to understand,,, u-um,, if we date theres gonna be some issuesâ you said but he just stared at you with cocky eyebrows and a dark gaze, running his tongue on the inside of his cheek.
âdo you think i care? would i ask you if i cared?â he said to which you shook your head automatically, what more could you do?
âyou get until tomorrow to think and if i donât get the answer i want well,,, weâll see what iâll do to you.â
Seungmin
he plots shit behind your back yk?
heâs more of the sneaky type of yanderes (oop spoiler to a fic heh)
like he makes this like fucking year long plan where the objective of the mission is to make you obssessed with him-
he starts kinda subtely,,, first its going to the same gym as you and like,,, knowing where you placed your stuff
and then he starts putting small notes like under your waterbottle when you went to grab something that say like âi think youre cute, call meâ and then his number
you obviously dont react,,, because why the fuck would you contact a stranger at the gymÂ
BUT THEN you realize that its him, its mf kim seungmin. yo,,,, u didnt know he went to this gym,,, that was not,,, the best-
of course you got a bit interested,,, you wanted to know how he was off camera,,, like just in his everyday life and i meeean,,, he was attractive but obviously you should stay away bc,,, heâs a celebrity but seungmin didnt want to stay away
he notes somehow started to get more aggressive,,, suddenly being like âwhy are you ignoring me?â and such,,,
and one night you were left alone in the gym with him,,, it was sooo quiet, only the sounds of your strained breaths as you lifted a dumbell
here where the plan came to play ;))
Jeongin
heâs obsessed with you and you are not going anywhere, even if you rejected him.Â
heâs more clingy?? LIKE HE WILL NOT LEAVE YOU
ok sure,, he falls more into the stalking category too,,,Â
also veeeery much a obssessed kinda yandere,,, like his mind is not thinking about how to like capture you,,, more about how to make you soooo comfortable and fool you into loving him despite the circumstances?
i just imagine that you work in a cafe and jeongin often meets you there when he buys coffee and you are already in awe when you see fucking yang jeongin enter the coffee shop on your shift but you were even more excited when he leaves his phone number on a napkin and slides it over the counter before leaving.Â
you thought about it,,, contemplating multiple times but,,, you decided it would be best not to since well,,, safety purposesÂ
but he would visit you and every day his face got more and more perplexed cause he wondered why you didnt call
mf would not leave you alone, he would even wait outside the coffee shop until you finished your shift and walk you home,,, so now he knew where you lived-Â
and then do the same thing over and over again until you talked to him.
does. not. give. up.Â
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Sorry if this has been asked before, but do u have any songs u associate with ur versions of the ew guys?
ahoy there! what a fun question!! :D :D :D
so i actually have a playlist for my au at least with a couple songs for each character. :3 i have to add some for the neighbors, but hey :3 (uhhh it dawned on me that you just asked for them in general and not specifically my au but honestly? i dont make too much of a distinction - but still, my bad!)
fun tip: everyones got at least one song from death of a bachelor by p!atd but i didnt put them all on the playlist because then it would be likeâŠ. 90% p!atd and thats just silly
anyway heres my ~best of~ picks or whatever!
OH ALSO if youre not into đđgarbage weepy edgy boysđđ i would not recommend reading further <3 i love silly boys but my song picks are always dramatic because i have no self control. đ
edd: my ordinary life - the living tombstone; They tell me that I'm special, I smile and shake my head I'll give them stories to tell friends about the things I said They tell me I'm so humble, I say, "I'm turning red" They let me lie to them and don't feel like they've been misled They give so much to me, I'm losing touch, get me? Served on a silver platter, ask for seconds, they just let me wrecking ball - mother mother; It takes a dedicated hand To put it through the wall You gotta wanna break the heart Of all those pretty porcelain dolls You gotta want to be the drummer in the band You gotta want to be a battering ram You gotta see the artistry In tearing the place apart with me baby dont threaten me with a good time - p!atd Champagne, cocaine, gasoline And most things in between I roam the city in a shopping cart A pack of camels and a smoke alarm This night is heating up Raise hell and turn it up Saying "If you go out you might pass out in a drain pipe" Oh, yeah, don't threaten me with a good time
tom: bad decisions - redhook; Okay, now please don't think I'm tryna glamorise all of the shit that I despise about myself 'Cause my mental health is tenuous at best from all the pressure and the stress of other people's expectations I'm crushed by the weight, so I self-medicate to escape Then I just make more mistakes, can't break this stupid cycle of self-hate dread in my heart - mother mother; Oh I wonder what it's like to be the type who doesn't burn Ya the kind who fights the good fight Not the kind you'll find fisti-fuckin-cuffin' in the dirt death of a bachelor - p!atd Do I look lonely? I see the shadows on my face People have told me I don't look the same Maybe I lost weight, I'm playing hooky with the best of the best Pull my heart out my chest, so that you can see it too
tord: heroes - emmy curie; So you wanna be the hero, kid, be adored by everyone 'Cause no one can forget you when you're the reason they have won You want the fame, the attention, but more than anything You're scared of fading to the background like you didn't mean a thing anime intro - public theatre; I couldn't help but notice your under eyes You were looking pretty skinny last night Are you even fighting I couldn't help but notice your little lies You keep saying that you'll be just fine Are you even trying Anymore now house of memories - p!atd Baby, we built this house on memories Take my picture now, shake it 'til you see it And when your fantasies become your legacy Promise me a place in your house of memories
matt: emperor's new clothes - p!atd Welcome to the end of eras Ice has melted back to life Done my time and served my sentence Dress me up and watch me die If it feels good, tastes good It must be mine Dynasty decapitated You just might see a ghost tonight Double, double, double down And if you don't know now you know inferno - rain paris; Terriblyâ
terrible, she's a villain One as sweetâ
as caramel, she's my saint Think I'm getting butterflies, but it's really Something telling me to run away
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The Doctor Is In
Stephen Strange x reader
Bruce Banner x reader (platonic)
warnings:
a/n: hey! idk how to build stairs guys. i didnt feel like researching it. i dont care if itâs wrong. leave me alone. part 2/2.
prompt:
Out (1)
There was no hope of Stephen coming back. Every truth you had to face was harsher than the last. Even when you got home and realized that Wong was among the vanished...and he didnât fix the stairwell.
Maybe the stairwell was a good thing. It gave you something to focus on in these hard times. Sure, itâd been a month since the incident, but that still wasnât enough time for the world to heal. That meant that contractors were hard to come by. But the roof would have a tarp over it for some time. No way youâd deal with that.
So you took a trip to the hardware store, you stocked up on wood and nails, lacquer and wood stain. Anything else you needed for the project. Anything to keep you busy.
There were so many sleepless nights. You hated being alone in Sanctum, hated being alone in your bed. Every so often you would nap on the couch, but then youâd get right back to work. Weeks on end you spent on the stairwell. How long will you stick around while I talk about the stairwell?
Doctor Banner called you from time to time. His voicemails were kind, heartfelt, but you couldnât stop now. The gutted stairwell from a couple weeks ago was coming by very nicely. As nice as it could when worked on my an amateur. Alright, it looked awful, but you couldnât stand using a ladder to get to the second floor.
As you were staining the wood, you played a message from Bruce:
âDoctor L/N, itâs Bruce. I hope youâre doing alright, but you know that if youâre not, Iâm here for you. All the remaining Avengers have kind of...gone their separate ways for the most part, theyâre pretty broken up about everything. I just want you to know that because you donât...have to be strong right now. I understand if you canât be. Just call me back whenever you can? I want to make sure youâre alright. Weâre survivors, we should stick together.â
Bruce hadnât known you long, but he was still a great person and friend. You should call him back, but if you lost focus, you may lose yourself. So you continued to wipe against the grain of the fresh stairs and moved to the next step. And the next. And the next.
The last step was the lacquer and seal. You were scared to finish up. What would you occupy yourself with once this was over? You thought about the answer until the very last step and admired your shabby craftsmanship. Itâll do. Or maybe you should tear it all down and start over? While you were thinking over your newest thought, your phone rang again. Bruce Banner.
âHey, Bruce.â You answered the phone as you normally would and sat on the floor in front of your work.
âY/N?â Bruce asked in disbelief. âY/N, hey! How are you? I donât know if youâve been getting my calls..?â
âI have.â You quickly replied.
âOh.â He quietly nodded to himself.
âIâm sorry, Bruce.â You realized your mistake and knew you may have come off as a little rude. Heâd been nothing but kind to you, but youâd just realized you were alone today.
âNo, no! Itâs okay! I understand, donât worry. What have you been up to?â His effort to start a conversation may be successful this time around.
âI fixed the stairwell. All of it. Thatâs what Iâve been doing the past few weeks. I just finished a few minutes ago.â You felt awkward talking to him. Not because of him, not at all. Just because you hadnât really had any human contact in a while.
âI didnât take you for a carpenter, Doctor.â Bruce was genuinely surprised with your skillset, you could hear it in his voice.
âAnd you still wonât once you see the job I did.â You actually managed to let out a chuckle. You didnât know you could still do that.
âOh, I hear ya loud and clear.â Bruce laughed, too. I wonder if he was having the same thoughts as you. âY/N, do you want to go out to lunch like, now? I could use some company, maybe you could, too.â
âYeah,â you checked the time on your watch, Stephenâs watch, and realized you worked through the night and day, âtext me an address, Iâll meet you anywhere. See you soon.â You hung up pretty quickly, only to get ready ASAP. You were sort of covered in âstair suppliesâ and smelled like...not good. Youâd take a quick shower, put on some clean clothes, and take off. Unfortunately, the stairs werenât dry, so it was another round up the ladder.
âââââ
You finally took a trip back to your bedroom and shuffled through the closet filled with your...late husbandâs clothing. It still smelled like him, surprisingly. You wondered just how long it would last. You hoped itâd be forever, but you grabbed your own clothes and quickly got dressed, then checked your phone to see that Bruce was running âa little late.â Itâs okay, you were, too.
You took a seat on Stephenâs side of the bed and decided to snoop. Did it count as snooping if he was no longer here? You knew that he didnât keep secrets from you, so what was the worst you could stumble upon? Books, books, and more books. But some were important books, ones detailing mystic arts. Maybe...maybe it was time to pick up a new skill. You stuffed the book in your bag and decided to head out now before you got too comfy in an actual bed.
âââââ
You and Bruce sat at a booth in the empty diner, awkwardly gazing over the menu while trying to stir up some conversation. Itâd been a while since either of you had visited someone, you didnât even know what to talk about.
âSo, home renovations, huh?â Bruce asked while peaking over the fold of the laminated list.
âSomething like that.â You sighed and set yours down and aside. âI know what Iâm getting. What about you?â
âI just need a minute.â The only noise besides your bland conversation was the rustling of dishes in the back, which didnât last for long. âGot it. A burger. Thatâll do it.â Bruce announced and got the attention of the waiter.
Ordering took a second, but soon you and Bruce were alone again and ready to talk.
âHow are the other Avengers? I know you said they went their separate ways, but...â You inquired and were surprised to see a smile crack on Bruceâs face. âWhat?â
âAt least I know you listened to my voicemails.â He chuckled and took a sip of his iced tea. âTheyâre dealing with it. I donât exactly know how. Natâs staying at the compound, Iâm sure sheâs glad to have a home again. Cap went out on his own. Thor went back to his people. Tony and Pepper are trying to separate themselves from the world, I think. I donât blame them. Thatâs all I know.â You stayed silent, but nodded along to his outer thoughts. âYou alright?â
âIâm sorry, Bruce.â You started. âI didnât mean to ignore you, leave you hanging. I just still donât know how to take this. I keep thinking about what Stark told me when he came back. His whole âthis will all make sense soonâ thing. Nothing about this makes sense to me.â
âWell, Strange was different, wasnât he? He had that Stone, he had those powers, he might know something we donât.â Bruce explained to you, an attempt to comfort you. âWeâve tried everything, y/n. Maybe itâs time to wait, maybe in time youâll see that he sacrificed himself...for you.â You teared up at the scientistâs words and quickly wiped your eyes as the food was placed before you. âThank you, sir.â Bruce said as the waiter walked off. âHey, y/n? Itâs okay that youâre hurting. I get it. But please donât act like youâre alone. Iâm gonna be here for you, okay?â
âYeah,â you sniffled while hiding your wet eyes, âMe, too, Bruce.â
âââââ
When you got stressed out when you were younger, you threw yourself into your studies. Maybe that was why you were such an accomplished scientist. But what studies did you have now?
You had a library full of knowledge. It wasnât your usual knowledge, but it would suffice. Now, the book that youâd snagged from Stephenâs bedside was a bit advanced for you, but that was okay. You had options.
Where would you even begin? This place was bigger than you remembered. Was this another spell? Did you know what you were talking about? Stop thinking, y/n. Start reading.
You picked out a book. You just ran with it. You recalled stories from Stephen. You remembered you needed the ring. What did he call it? Song ring? Sink ring? Slink ring?
Sling ring.
Not a problem, you could find one. Sanctum probably had tons. Maybe in Stephenâs study? You wished you had asked him more about his arts before, you just didnât get it at the time.
One was stashed in a drawer. It was Stephenâs ring. The one he used himself. And it was the only one you could find, so itâd have to do. And so you got to studying.
The first time the air sparked by your hand was magical. Literally. But it made you feel something for the first time in nearly three months. And that was just the beginning. It felt like you were carrying on Stephenâs legacy in a way. Youâd never be âSorcerer Supreme,â but you didnât have any intention of that. You just wanted his memory to live on, even if it were through you.
So youâd practice and youâd learn and youâd practice and youâd learn. Youâd see Bruce whenever you could, and he soon noticed your mood change.
âIâm glad to see you happy for a change.â He told you while you walked through the park.
âYeah, it feels great.â You told him while watching construction vehicles cleaning up the debris that had been lying around for months.
âIâve been meaning to ask. Whatâs with the ring?â He looked at your hand and you lifted it closer.
âOh...itâs Stephenâs.â You simply stated.
âIs it like a wedding ring?â He took a closer look and let you laugh it up for a quick second.
âNo, no!â You shook your head at the ridiculous question. âI might as well show you. I havenât told anyone yet, but thatâs because youâre the only person I talk to.â You stopped in your tracks and shooed him back to give yourself enough space. âReady?â Bruce looked terrified, but nodded a response and watched you raise your hands ahead, concentrating on the small portal you had began to open. Bruce recognized the opening since heâd fallen through it before.
âYouâre one of the sorcerers?â Bruceâs eyes widened. âWhy didnât you ever tell me?â
âI just started learning!â You exclaimed with a bright smile. âI needed something to get me through this all...and I wanted to protect Sanctum like Stephen and Wong had always stressed doing.â
âThatâs...amazing, y/n. Self-taught magic? By a scientist, no less. Look at you go!â Bruce had a knack for being supportive. You were glad that he crashed through your roof and into your stairs.
âThanks, Bruce. Maybe in time Iâll be able to cast a spell that fixes my roof.â You shrugged.
âOh? Come on! I said I was sorry!â
âââââ
And then five years went by. Flew by, actually. Youâd become a skilled sorcerer and used your skills around Sanctum. There wasnât much to do here on Earth. It was a bit quiet.
Bruce was still a close friend of yours! Youâd advised him in his quest for balance. He was no longer at war with himself.
The roof was fixed! You had Bruce spectate your very own spell to repair the damages heâd inflicted, but all was forgiven.
Then one normal day you got a call from him.
âHey Bruce! Howâs it going?â You answered, even though it interrupted your meditation.
âCan you meet me at the diner ASAP?â He sounded a little off, but still upbeat, so you opened a portal and stepped through to find yourself right out front. It was easy to spot him through the window, but there were others with him. Avengers.
âHey, all.â You took a seat beside an unfamiliar one. âHi, Iâm y/n.â You told him as a plate of food was set in front of you.
âI ordered you your favorite. Hope youâre hungry.â Bruce smirked at you and let you get to it.
âSo, itâs been a while, huh?â You asked the two Avengers across from you.
âIt has.â Natasha sighed. âI wasnât aware you were...also a sorcerer.â She began.
âI had a lot of free time.â Last they saw you, you werenât as cool, calm, or collected. They were glad that youâd found peace. âI have a feeling this isnât a social lunch.â
âIâm sorry to pull you from your calm, Doctor L/Nââ You cut Steve off.
âY/N is fine.â You replied.
âScott here,â Steve motioned to the awkward man sitting alongside you, âwas stuck in the Quantum Realm for some time, if youâre familiar. He thinks that thereâs a way to...to undo what Thanos did.â You peered over at Bruce and watched him shrug as your heart started to beat faster and stomach started doing turns. You hated the thought of getting your hopes up, but you still dearly missed your husband.
âWhat can I do?â
âââââ
You had a hand in opening the dozens of portals around the ruins of the Avengers Compound, but you werenât the only one. Stephen, Wong, and hundreds of other sorcerers were assisting to bring an army to combat the troops of an outdated Thanos, and you were so close to Stephen.
Using your magic to create a pathway to the sky, you leaped from step to step to get a clear look of the battlefield. And to let Stephen see you. He did. And so did the cloak.
Youâd never used your powers to fight, so youâd have to step it up out here. But you knew Stephen wouldnât let you get hurt. And you believed that you could handle this yourself.
âY/N!â Stephen called to you as he flew to your altitude and held you in a special embrace that youâd nearly forgotten the feeling of. âItâs so good to see you.â
âAre you kidding me, Stephen?â You chuckled through tears that you just couldnât hold in, tears that dragged through the dirt and dust on your face, clearing small lines down your cheeks. âI have missed you every day since the moment you left. I am so glad to have you back.â
âIâm sorry I couldnât say goodbye, y/n. I truly am. But I knew that you would manage without me. You always have.â He explained to you in such a heartfelt way, admiring your capability to still be standing in the air.
âYou knew Iâd become a sorcerer, didnât you?â You cocked a brow and watched him smirk.
âI had an inkling.â He joked with you as the firefight below was still rampaging.
âItâs very unprofessional of you to be talking to your s/o during times of crisis like this.â You chuckled and broke your spell to fall back to the ground, stopping yourself before it was too late in what could only be described as a âsuperhero landing.â Now that you were on the ground, assistance was required for your own side of the battle.
You and your fellow sorcerers had to defend more than anything. Shields popped up across the battlefield in an effort to keep your people alive. There were too many close calls and you wanted to survive long enough to go home with your husband.
âY/N, over here!â Stephen beckoned you to the flood that would have made this fight much harder, and you were delighted to defend alongside him. The cloak rushed to you and gave you a fast track to the edge of the water, you couldnât help but that it for itâs kind service. âReady?â
âOf course.â You lifted your palms and motioned towards that water, redirecting it and keeping it at bay for the time being. âI love you, Stephen.â You remembered to tell him.
âI love you, too, y/n.â He replied with his focus still on the flood. âAnd Iâm proud of you. So very proud.â
âCouldnât have done it with you.â You joked and stabilized the rushing waters, giving you a true load-off before the end was clear. Dust passed through the sunken hole you all stood inside. Dust of your enemies that had finally lost. You and Stephen stared at each other in disbelief, yet couldnât help but run into each otherâs arms. âThis is real? We won?â
âIn a way.â
âââââ
Stephen and you dressed in all black were standing in the back yard of your savior. Tony had given his life to give others a life. You were just sorry that it had to be him.
Bruce stood alongside you with a long face and an injured arm. It was time for you to be there for him like heâd been there for you.
âThanks for bringing back my husband, Bruce.â You whispered to him while holding Stephenâs hand tightly. Over the past few days, you just couldnât seem to let go of him.
âOh, yeah? That was nothing.â Bruce playfully answered through his sorrow.
âHowâs your arm feeling?â You asked him, making sure the sling wasnât twisted up an any way.
âNot the greatest, but Iâll be okay.â He assured you and watched as you leaned your head onto Stephenâs smile with a sense of relief. âIâm really happy for you, y/n...â
âBut?â You raised an eyebrow with a hint of worry.
âBut you better still hang out with me.â He smiled at you and you even heard a chuckle escape Stephenâs lips.
âYou can count on it, Bruce.â You lifted a hand for a fist bump and collided your knuckles with his, even if they were a bit oversized.
âShall we get going, dear?â Stephen asked you while he hooked his arm around yours and opened a portal home. You waved goodbye to Bruce and went on your way, stepping right into Sanctum as the way closed behind you.
âSo you really meant it, huh?â You asked your husband while setting your belongings down.
âThat I love what youâve done with the place?â Stephen laughed at your oncoming smirk and walked forward, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you forward to kiss the top of your head. âOf course, dear.â
âEven the stairs?â You peeked your head up to look at your husband and watched his smile grow. Youâd never bothered casting a spell to properly repair them. Maybe you were just too proud of your work. Maybe it was a reminder that you got through these five years on your own terms.
âI do.â He leaned down to kiss your lips. âIt adds character to this place.â
âMore character than the magic?â You prodded at him.
âI think you mean âsorcery.ââ He corrected as you leaned into his chest and slightly swayed back and forth, taking in his presence for the 50th time since heâd come home.
âOh, of course. Silly me.â
taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @lokihiddles // @frostedficrecs // @lotsoffandomrecs // @johnmurphyisqueer // @teenwaywardasgardian // @pappydaddy // @captainshazamerica // @freya-xo // @ravenmoore14 // @thisetaernallove // @ofthedewthesunlight // @canarypoint // @zoeyserpentluck // @randomawesomeperson102 // @ghost-bich // @wonderful-writer // @of-a-chaotic-mind // @groovyfluxie // @procrastinatingsapphictrash // @lxncelot // @swanimagines // @randomfandomimagine // @blizzardbabe // @agentshortstacc // @rosadiaz-sarayvargas-harleyquinn // @werewolf-himbo // @comiocudequemtalendo1 // @mochamoff // @the-marvel-meme-emporium // @summersimmerus //
#stephen strange imagine#stephen strange x reader#stephen strange#dr strange x reader#dr strange imagine#dr strange#marvel#avengers#marvel imagine#marvel x reader#avengers x reader#avengers imagine#bruce banner#bruce banner x reader#bruce banner imagine#hulk#hulk x reader#hulk imagine
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When I Was Your Man || A Ralbert One Shot
a/n - hello! so basically this one shot is a College Newsies AU where Racetrack and Albert broke up and Race started dating Spot :'). it's about ralbert though?? so it's like- okay its from alberts POV and it's based on When I Was Your Man so yeah :D (all lyrics from the song will be in bold and italicized),, i'll only be writing the chorus once <3
also i didnt edit this cuz its late and IM TIRED SO sorry if it sucks lol
tw('s) - cussing
same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now
Albert didn't sleep well at night, if he even slept at all. His bed was empty. The same bed that he had slept in since the beginning of college. But it wasn't his bed, it was their bed. At least, it used to be theirs. Now, it was just his, but he couldn't accept that it was only his.
But at one point, it was theirs. Him and Racetrack, it was once their bed. Even if it was only his, Albert could swear that Race's body was still outlined in the cushion of his bed.
The bed used to be so small, too small for the two of them. They cuddled together to keep each other from falling off. But now it was huge. He had no-one to roll over to in the morning, he was alone.
He couldn't even sleep on the right side of the bed. That was Race's side. Even if Race hadn't slept on the bed for a long time, even if he would never sleep on the bed again. That was his side, not Alberts.
And often times he would lay awake in bed, staring at the ceiling. He would reach over to the right for his boyfriends- ex-boyfriends hand. But it wasn't there. He reached over and was met with sheets and pillows.
So he didn't sleep, because he had no-one to sleep with and his bed was too big to sleep in. And he stayed awake until the next morning when he got into his car and drove from his apartment to the school.
Not even in his car did he get peace. It wasn't his car, it was Race's car. Race had picked it out, he liked the color. And it smelled like Race's cologne and it held memories of Race in each dent of the leather seats.
So he sold the car. He got a new car, his own car. But even with the smell of Race gone, with his memories in the seats gone. The radio in the new car betrayed Albert.
our song on the radio but it don't sound the same
The car radio had one station, and Albert could swear that the station only had one playlist they played each day. Because every day, and it never missed one day, it would play their song. The song they first danced to. So Albert turned off the radio, and he never turned it on. Even when friends begged him to play music, the radio staid off and he played music from his quiet phone.
Every day, Albert showed up to school exhausted. He nearly passed out in class. Lunch was the only time he ever slept. Everyone assumed he didn't get sleep due to his hard classes, which couldn't be farther from the truth. He didn't do his work. He couldn't pay attention in class, not with Race there.
when our friends talk about you, all it does is just tear me down
"You really lucked out being with him, Al," Jack said.
Romeo agreed and added onto the comment, "Kelly's right. He's gorgeous. And a genius too. Too smart for his own good."
Albert raised his head from his arms with a desperately sad look. He sighed and shook his head, "I told you guys. I know we broke up a while ago, but it still hurts, okay?" He rested his head back into his arms and closed his eyes tightly. His heart ached with every comment. He knew Race was gorgeous. He knew Race was a genius. He knew so much about him, yet he didn't know him enough to keep him happy.
"Sorry, man. Forgot," Jack mumbled. Romeo muttered something of an apology and scratched at his neck.
"I know you hate school activities," Romeo started, "But you should come to the party tonight. Dance a little, I think it'll cheer you up."
Albert sighed and tried not to think about why dancing would be hard for him. He looked up and pushed his hair out of his face, "I'll come."
'cause my heart breaks a little when i hear your name
"Race!" Spot called from the couch. The music boomed and Spots voice was quiet, but Albert heard the name anyways. He immediately turned to the boy.
Spot grinned as Race made his way over to him. Race plopped into his lap and smiled back as he hugged the boy. Alberts eyes widened and his chest ached.
Even just hearing Race's name hurt Albert, brought back a wave of memories. Each yell of Race's name when he did something dumb, each fond laugh of the name when he complimented him, each whine of Racetrack's name when he bugged Albert too much. He missed it all.
it all just sounds like ooh, ooh, hoo
Jack and Romeo were definitely talking to Albert, but he couldn't hear anything they were saying. The music sounded like gibberish and he couldn't think. All he could do was stare at the couple on the couch and ache at the sight.
mm, too young, too dumb to realize, that i should have bought you flowers
Albert watched as Race giggled at the flower Spot offered him. Spot smiled and put the small yellow flower behind Race's ear. The stem stuck between his ear and his head whilst the bud pointed outwards.
The years that they dated, Albert and Race were young and naive. He didn't know how to be romantic or how to make Race happy. No matter how hard he tried.
"I should've bought him flowers," He sighed. Jack and Romeo shared a knowing glance before pushing Albert to sit down on the couch.
and held your hand
"I mean," Albert continued, "I was too insecure to do anything with him." They didn't even hold hands in public, because Albert was scared. Scared of what society would think.
should have gave you all my hours, when i had the chance
Albert and Race had started dating their first year of college. Albert was constantly busy with classes. He was always doing work and stressing about class.
Anytime Race would make an attempt to spend time with him, he shut it down.
"I'm doing work," He would say, "You should be doing work, too."
He wanted to do well, get a good job, find a good home, start a family. But all of that was dumb. It was pointless. To hell with it all if we didn't get to come back from his job to see Race. Because Race was his home and he didn't want to start a family with anyone else.
take you to every party 'cause all you wanted to do was dance
"Al!" Race would whine and grab at his arm, "Dance with me, please. Just for a little bit."
Albert never did dance with him. No matter how much he asked, he refused to do so. He couldn't, he needed to get good grades. He needed to provide.
"We can dance later," He would say.
The usual response he would get was, "Promise?" But one day, he received a different answer, "There isn't going to be a later. Not for us, Albert."
now my baby's dancing, but he's dancing with another man
Race pulled Spot up from the couch. They smiled as they moved together to the middle of the room. The music vibrated around them as the two danced.
Albert watched from the camp as he shook his leg. He took in a deep and quaking breath before stumbling out of the house. He threw his cup to the side and gulped in a large breath.
my pride, my ego, my needs, and my selfish ways, caused a good strong man like you to walk out my life
"What do you mean their won't be a later for us, Racer?" Albert had asked, finally looking up from his studies.
Race had scoffed, "Oh, of course! That's what gets you to look me in the eye, huh?" He had rolled his eyes, "We're done, Al. I can't do this anymore, can't do us. Okay? You're so god damn selfish. You only do what's best for you. Ever think about what's best for us, huh? Do you ever even think about me?"
"Of course I think about you, Race. You're all I ever think about," Al had stuttered out.
"Sure," Race had laughed sourly, "I just wanted to fucking dance, Albert. You wouldn't even do that with me. I'm leaving." With that, Race had grabbed all of his stuff and walked out of the apartment.
now i never, never get to clean up the mess i made, oh. and that haunts me every time i close my eyes
Albert closed his eyes when he left the house. Their breakup flashed behind his eyelids and he choked out a sob. He fell to his knees on the grass.
"God damnit," He weakly hit the grass beneath him, "I could've fixed it. I could- Could've. But- Spot. I can't fix it anymore."
although it hurts, i'll be the first to say that i was wrong
He shook his head, "Race was right. I never thought about him." And his stomach twisted with that realization.
Albert has thought he was thinking about Race, about their future together. But it was never about Race, it was about him. He needed to good grades, Racer didn't. Everything that happened was his fault, and he knew that.
oh, i know i'm probably much too late, to try and apologize for my mistakes
He took a deep breath before falling back to sit down on the grass. The door opened and a boy with curly blonde hair sat down next to him.
Race gave Albert a sad smile.
"I'm not going to say sorry," Albert started, "Because that won't make up for anything. I was wrong, about everything." Race nodded.
"Al," Race said quietly.
Albert shook his head with a small grin, "Don't. Go get, Spot. Be happy. Go love the boy who you want to see when you get home from long work days, okay? Love him the way I love you." He paused, "Not the way I treated you, but the way I feel about you. I know it didn't seem like it. But I love you."
Race smiled and gave Albert a pat on the cheek, "I loved you too."
That was the sad tragedy of their relationship.
Albert was in love with Race. Race had been in love with Albert.
They loved each other at different times. But Albert could accept the pain of being in love with a boy would didn't love him back, because even though Race was in love with someone else, he was happy. And that's all Albert wanted, because Race deserved to be happy.
#:)#i actually don't think this is that sad tbh#but maybe thats cuz i wrote it IDK#like i think its bittersweet#idk if thats the right word#anyways#actual tags now#ralbert#racetrack higgins#race newsies#albert newsies#albert dasilva#race higgins#racetrack newsies#livesies#newsies#broadway#musicals#one shot#newsies oneshot#oneshot#mylo.types#mylo.headline#ralbert oneshot
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Daily recap from my double lifee
Uhh so of course we were cruisin' this time I could see outside the ship but still technically couldnt see water cause it was covered with a layer of ground. It was natural somehow? but it looked like waves rolling under turf. So it was weird.
Um i was with a group of my friends in a stateroom or our apt on the ship pretty much and we were all laughing and giggling and having fun late into the night and this couple (i think were also our friends?) came in to go to sleep and we didnt wanna be loud and wake them. SO i was looking off our balcony and was like "guys theres so much of the ship we havent explored, lets just find another place to talk and chill"
i had a little meta flash of thought where i thought "does this count spirit, if i do it with a group" but still didnt know i was dreaming.
So we went somewhere and turns out we went to this familiar area where its like a food court with a bunch of diff restaurants. So we find one with enough seats. I was gonna sit next to ally but decided to sit across. Liam sat across from me. In a red orange/rust colored fuzzy quarterzip. And we were sitting trying to order something cause we were all hungry. So im like, im gonna go ask for a menu. There were two restaurants in the area we were sitting so i think one person went to one place for a menu and i went to another one. The place i went too was called "Gardenia"
SO i go, and Aunty A and Uncle P were sitting at the bar together and i stopped and said hi and said i was getting a menu for my friends and I. I was def wearing like a tube top and a cardigan.
So i bring back a menu? and like a sprite and some spinach dip as an appetizer to the table. And then we're sitting there chillin talking be friends\
And on the radioooooo in the food court. Fucking 2/14 comes on, and i look at Liam like "r u kidding me" but he was being nervous and shy about i think? like a shy smirk. Idk very good chance that was actually him.
And i was like "I cant escape this damn song" kinda annoyed because....well idk. But i def had a frustrated tone and like i was like "literally wtf" and i think it was because liam wasnt giving enough of a reaction so part of me was just like i cant believe this song wont leave me alone and now i have to stare at him while i hear the lyrics "i cant be just friends....your messing with my head......" and pretend it doesnt apply to us like it obviously does.
And idk if double life me remembers but ive dealt with this situation a few fucking times. Have i stared at that man and its awkward and it does drive me a little crazy how we just have to pretend because he wont admit to his feelings.
But i feel a little bad for being sassy in the dream bc that was probably him and maybe not a positive reaction.
But then after it came on same ol mistakes and we were all shocked like two in a row that we all know and mean a lot to us. Thats wild. But i was like very loudly......like ayyeeeee and i was wondering if it was gonna be rihanna or tame impala but before i was able to find out, it changed again and then kept changing.
So idk whos on dream aux, maybe i was in liams subconcious while he was flipping through a playlist.
Or even funnier, i know he sleeps with music blasting. So what if that was his dream music and he woke up during 2/14 and changed it.
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Crazy long text ahead i warn you, just explaining some process I went through while drawing this Frank and Julie low light dying thingie, probably gonna drop some wips along the way, you may want to see⊠idk, dealerâs choice
!TRIGGER WARNING! Violence, death, suicide. Proceed with caution.
Well where do we begin? The inspiration maybe?
Exploring the magical world of Spotify when a band came in, one of the first songs (if not the first one) of theirs I heard was Partners in Crime by Set It Off, you know, love at first sight, love for their voices, their music style, aaand the lyrics, OH BOI the lyrics, check it out:
âYouâll never takes us alive We swore that death will do us part Theyâll call our crimes a work of art Youâll never takes us alive Weâll live like spoiled royalty, lovers and partnersâ
Dunno, for two passionate juvenil delinquents that just wants trouble this line really fits to me, the dreamy couple feels invencible.
âEverybody freeze Nobody move Put the money in the bag Or we will shoot Empty out the vault And me and my doll will be on our wayâ
Itâs actually interesting to think of the Legion robbing a bank, itâs not like troublesome teens didnât do that in movies câmon, itâs a small city, they wear masks, ez!
âOur paper faces flood the streets And if the heat comes close enough to burn Then weâll play with fire âcause
Youâll never takes us aliveâ
THIS. This is so a Legion thing to say. Can you imagine their masks all around the streets as a warning like âHEY, WE ARE HERE, FEAR USâ I love this
âHere we find our omnipotent outlaws Fall behind the grind tonight Left unaware that the lone store owner Wonât go down without a fight Where we gonna go Heâs got us pinned Baby Iâm a little scared Now, donât you quit Heâs sounded the alarm I hear the sirens closing inâ
The second big moment, the adrenaline along with the instrumental is crazy for real
âThe skies are black with lead-filled rain A morbid painting on display This is the night the young love died Buried at each others sideâ
THIS. (again) is the main theme of the drawing, itâs where the inspiration flood over me, the scene was clear in my mind, câmon if you read till here thereâs absolutely no reason not to listen to the song you wonât regret im not even getting payed to show it off
ACTUALLY FORGET IT- i just won a sub on Cody Carsonâs stream WHAT IS LIFE??????? Thanks Max!!!
I totally didnât draw this while listening to the music when i should be working what are you talking about??
Hold the sketch, focus on the gun. Itâs dope aint it?
Anyways, here goes the lore, along with the music lyrics I filled up the gaps, well, Suz and Joey are not around, maybe doing school stuff Julie didnât feel like doing so she decides to hang out with Frank in the meanwhile, theyâre on the lodge, bored, upset about the world cause itâs what teens do in their free time, listening to one of their mixtapes, probably Frankâs, the more hardcore one when the idea hit: what if they try some good mischief? âThereâs a small banks a mile from here, want some adrenaline babe?â And oh of course she does, grab your mask, here we go
Sorry, not a big legs-drawing fanâŠ
They grab their knives, put on the masks, get ready, drive to the bank. I didnt really think this part through, the song says it all. Long story short - they rob the bank, the police arrives, the action begins.
They brought their knives, didnât expect the cops to show up with guns, damn they didnt even know little Ormond cops had actual guns. After long minutes of hiding on the bank safe the couple decides to fight their way out, they would be more useful alive than dead so laws could apply, but that went out of question once Frank stabbed the first bank employee on his triumphal way out, the police donât think twice before shooting to protect the citizens inside.
Frank and Julie have too little time to react, the stress and anxiety kicks in, they go feral, crazy cinematic bullet avoids, for a moment itâs possible to get away. It all happened too quick, but in Julieâs vision it went slow motion. She just saw a cop leaning behind a car, aiming directly at Frank, even her fastest reaction wasnât fast enough to stop the trigger from popping. With tears in her eyes she watches as the bullet hits her boyfriend right in the chest.Â
She snaps. One target in mind, she sprints to the cop and stabs him over and over until sheâs sure he wonât see the sun set ever again. She takes his gun and rushes towards Frank who is kneeling against a taxi holding his torax, she screams that they must go to the hospital immediately but he refuses, hospital would be just a quick stop on his way to jail. No fucking way.Â
He demands to go back to the lodge, the cops are too busy helping their wounded partner to look for them, they think Frank may be dropped dead somewhere on the street after multiple shots, the two of them must flee before the cops realize the mistake and go hunting for them. NOW.
Julie side-carries Frank back to their car, the lack of a license of her own wonât stop her from driving as fast as the car can. Breathing heavily while constantly telling Frank to hold on, they will find a way out, they must do. Oh what a fucking stupid idea holy SHIT.Â
The travel takes half the time it usually does and still feels like hours. The car gets all red with Frankâs blood that keeps leaking. Once they arrive, Frank wants to go upstair, Julie shouts at him to keep next the central campfire once he should grab some heat (and for godâs sake why is he still carrying the money bag they stole????), anyway he gets the last word and they climb the stairs up and lay on the bed, Frank hisses from the pain but also sighs in relief for the soft spot under him, ignoring Julie cursing besides him, saying she can still call an ambulance, she doesnt want to lose him, Suz and Joey will be devastated, although he just replies with the phrase they were saying sooner that day âTheyâll never take us aliveâ.
After 20 minutes of agony, low whispers of memories of how they met, what they had been through together and a huge amount of blood moisturing the covers, Frank says heâs feeling light-headed, Julie looks at him and heâs paper white, the blood loss is finally getting to him, she wants to cry, scream, curse and stab that damn cop a hundred times again, but all she does is cuddle her head harder against his shoulder and tell him she loves him, that she will keep his legacy alive, with Joey and Susie, she will revenge him. He chuckles and slowly feels the life being drained from his weaked body until everything goes black.
Julie need a few seconds to process. Frank died. For real. He was good a few hours ago, he was right. They would never take them alive. Death could do them apart, but, he never said for how long they would be apart.
She reaches for the gun on the hand under Frankâs body. THAT DAMN GUN. She aims it to the side of her head, never leaving Frankâs side on the bed. Triggers it.
âPartners in crimeâ
Damn did I just write a fucking fanfiction? This shit is way longer than I expected, did anybody even get down here?
Well, this is the part of the drawing where i left cause I just couldnât afford to work on it, have in mind everytime the file were opened the whole lore came in my head, and fuck did i feel dizzy writing it all down. Hell the bloody details get me, seeing Frank so white with a blue undertone simulating the lifeless body gave me headaches fr. My escape was drawing other things until the courage to finish it came back. It was easier because the story kinda faded away from my mind, the drawing became âlighterâ to deal with.
Well, guess thatâs it. I hardly have this big insight while drawing, to visualize the finished piece on my brain and itâs just so fucking cool, making art with so many mixed feelings along, and overall pride, cause i feel so proud with the result you have no idea. It isnât perfect tho, but i like it anyway. So, thank you so much if you made it all the way here. gonna sleep now for fucks sake im gonna pass out bye
#dbd frank#dbd legion#dbd julie#dead by daylight#frank morison#julie kostenko#frank x julie#art#art process#drawing#illustration#creative process#fanfic#fanfiction#dbd fanfic#trigger warning#death#blood#suicide#wip#work in progress#dbd fanart#set it off#partners in crime#digital art#digital illustration#digital drawing#dbd frank x julie#world needs more of them as a couple#gonna draw ghostfrank next tho
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Oh Dolokhov/HĂ©lĂšne Brainrot Weâre Really In It Now, aka Dolokhov/HĂ©lĂšne playlist annotations!
I stole several songs from a playlist my friends have and Iâm not gonna put those on this list, I wonât pretend I came up with those
The ship playlists (since they arenât for canon couples) are very much based on my headcanons. We donât get to see them interact literally ever so Iâve just extrapolated what I can. Several of these songs are at least alluding to sex, I donât really think they actually slept together for various reasons I can enumerate if someone asks, but itâs more about the vibes of the song.
Casual Affair - Panic! At The Disco
Itâs literally in the title. Bestie how much more explanation do you need? I donât even like this song but itâs got the right energy
Those Nights - Bastille
âArenât we all just looking for a little bit of hope these days? Looking for somebody you can wake up with?â
Being drawn to each other because of mutual loneliness is a Thing in my interpretation of their relationship, and this hits the nail on the head.
But Itâs Better If You Do - Panic! At The Disco
âPraying for love and paying in naĂŻvetĂ©â
Again, mutual loneliness and desperation for anything resembling love. Also the âisnât this exactly where you like meâ bit fits because they wonât admit to liking each other outside of their weird intimate moments.
Hurricane - Panic! At The Disco
âDrop our anchors in a stormâ
The circumstances of their lives arent super fun at the moment so they find refuge in each other but in a very weird kind of unhealthy way! âWe are a hurricaneâ sort of alludes to knowing that youâre causing problems/your relationship isnât great.
Almost (Sweet Music) - Hozier
âIâm almost me again, sheâs almost youâ
Itâs about not really being In Love but kind of convincing yourself you are because it makes you feel better in the circumstances. I donât think either of them were fully into their relationship for various reasons. Not as in they didnât want the other, more that they were both too aware it would never work for long.
Hall & Oates - Satchmode
âI want to be in love again, with youâ
This oneâs about wanting the idea of love and companionship more than you actually like the other person, which I feel like kind of fits. This song is framed as one person in love with the other and one hesitating, but i think this works for both of them to hesitate.
Feel Something - Jaymes Young
âTouch me, someone, Iâm too young to feel so numbâ
The I have tried like six times and I canât word why I think this song works. I donât even like it, I skip it every time, but I think itâs got something to do with loneliness and desperation for love driving them to look for it in places they wouldnât normally? Who knows. Send me an ask if u do.
Another Place - Bastille
âDonât make promises to me that youâre gonna breakâ
They could never actually be together for SO many reasons and I think theyâre both pretty aware of that. They have no desire to pretend that their relationship is anything other than what it is (âwe only ever wanted one thing from thisâ).
When You Were Young - The Killers
âYou sit there in your heartache, waiting on some beautiful boy to save youâ
I do not think HĂ©lĂšne expected Dolokhkov to save her from anything except maybe monotony and loneliness, but this song slaps and if I can stretch the lyrics to work, I will
broken - lovelytheband
âI could be lonely with youâ
Almost every song on here (including this one) is just. Weâre messed up and I know we wonât really find love in each other but we might find solace for a while and be less lonely so uhhhhh wanna kiss me or what
Bleed Magic - I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME
âYou stand up, stand up, before I drag you downâ
They are NOT good for each other! Toxic relationships uwu
Sweater Weather - The Neighbourhood
I believe in bi4bi HĂ©lĂšne/Dolokhov
Enemy Fire - Bea Miller
âSweet words from a serpentâs tongueâ
This song is kinda complicated and parts of it donât fit but the energy of âeverything sucks including you but at least we can hide from the suckiness togetherâ is sorta there. Originally I just added it for the soldier vibes because I was testing out songs but I realized i can fit some of the lyrics so on the playlist it goes
Angel of the Small Death and the Codeine Scene - Hozier
âHer sweetened breath and her tongue so meanâ
They are horrible and cold to each other as a love language. This song is essentially just âWow my evil scary gf is so hotâ and youâre right Fyodor. She is.
Shut Up and Dance - WALK THE MOON
I wonât lie this oneâs mostly a joke, I just think the vibes of telling someone to shut up as (maybe because) youâre falling in love with them is Dolokhov/HĂ©lĂšne energy. Ignore all the parts about wanting to be with her forever and her being his destiny that is not why I added it.
Lone Ranger - Rachel Platten
âIâm just gonna leave, âcause baby Iâm a lone rangerâ
I do not think Dolokhov was intending to stay with her forever at all. Very rude of him. However, she probably also knew it wouldnât last forever, sheâs not stupid.
House of Memories - Panic! At The Disco
âPromise me a place in your house of memoriesâ
This is very much post-duel, their relationship has fizzled out but it was pretty important (do I mean emotionally or to the plot? Iâll never tell) and deserves to be remembered.
American Beauty/American Psycho - Fall Out Boy
âIâm the best worst thing that hasnât happened to you yetâ
SO MANY of these lyrics are so good for them like. HĂ©lĂšneâs beautiful Dolokhovâs a psycho... âyou take the full truth and you pour some outâ can you imagine them being open and honest with each other? Yeah, me neither. âWe were pity sexâ They were just sad and lonely! That was what allowed anything to happen at all in my head (not sex but bear with me itâs not my fault those are the lyrics). âAll those dirty thoughts of me, they were never yours to keepâ because HĂ©lĂšne is married to someone else, they really have no right to think of each other that way.
Sk8er Boi - Avril Lavigne
âHe wasnât good enough for herâ
UNIRONICALLY THIS SONG. HĂ©lĂšneâs complaints about Dolokhov staying with them are just the quoted lyric. âThey had a problem with his baggy clothesâ yeah Dolokhovâs not as rich and bougie and the rest of them and heâs certainly rough around the edges. And then the skater boy ending with a successful music career vs Dolokhov ending with a successful military career and a great reputation and both the women in the songs having sad endings...Iâm not wrong.
Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown On A Bad Bet - Fall Out Boy
âDoes your husband know the way that the sunshine gleams from your wedding band?â
The affair vibes. The AFFAIR VIBES. And the concept of âI will never end up like him [the husband]/ behind my back I already amâ in reference to using HĂ©lĂšne and deciding he hates her right after deciding sheâs hot...okay! I see you kinning Pierre, Dolokhov. You ARE being just like her husband :/
You Give Love A Bad Name - Bon Jovi
âShot through the heart and youâre to blameâ
This is just Dolokhovâs massive I Hate Women monologue condensed. Stop blaming beautiful women for YOUR attraction to them maybe đ«
Death Valley - Fall Out Boy
âDonât take love off the table yetâ
This is not a table sex joke this is not a table sex joke this is not a table sex joke this is n-
I didnt add it for that reason it was about a vibe but then. I realized. Now the original reason doesnât even matter.
Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner - Fall Out Boy
âIâll be your best kept secret and your biggest mistakeâ
Tell me the quoted lyric does not SCREAM HĂ©lĂšne/Dolokhov. You canât. Also âIâll weigh you down Iâll watch you choke/You look so good in blueâ really captures hatred as a love language.
This is Love - Air Traffic Controller
Ok I stole this from my friendsâ playlist but I did want to explain it because itâs not JUST Dolokhov and HĂ©lĂšne in my mind. The whole jealous fool second verse gives me Pierre around the duel energy as well
Bad Boy - Cascada
âBe my weekend lover but donât be my friendâ
Bernie Sanders voice I am once again asking you to hear me out about the unironic meme songs on my War and Peace character playlists. Itâs got the refusal to admit that she actually likes hanging out with him down. The line âafter some time you just pushed me asideâ referring to Dolokhov teasing Pierre about their affair because he got bored. âI dont need you in my life againâ...YEAH Iâm fairly sure they dont interact in canon again after that.
Hayloft - Mother Mother
âMy daddyâs got a gunâ
This song started playing on accident once when I was listening to this playlist and I was like huh. It fits though. The gun thing is twofold: 1) Though he is not her father, Pierre does have a gun in the duel and 2) I think Vassily would happily shoot Dolokhov for his relationships with Vassilyâs kids. Itâs also just the general forbidden love vibes mixed with the violence vibes.
affection - BETWEEN FRIENDS
âIâm looking for affection in all the wrong places and weâll keep falling on each other to fill the empty spacesâ
Have I been clear enough about my thesis that their relationship is based in mutual loneliness? Also, I like the acknowledgment that this is in fact the wrong place. I think theyâre both very aware of that.
Walk Away - Franz Ferdinand
âYes Iâm cold but not as cold as you areâ
This song is for them post-duel. Especially the âI cannot stand to see those eyes as apologies may rise/I must be strong, stay an unbelieverâ because 1) I hear the word eyes, I think of Dolokhov and 2) I think sheâs too smart to believe any apology he would give her, she knows he doesnât really mean it. The song kinda reads as someone trying to convince themselves theyâre happy that the relationship is over, which I think is definitely what happens for both of them.
Van Horn - Saint Motel
âTell me do you hate me? Or do you wanna date me?â
Obsessed with the dynamic of âI like you but thatâs embarrassing for both of us Iâm gonna act like I hate you insteadâ
#war and peace#helene kuragina#fedya dolokhov#my post#w&p playlists#helenkhov#is that their ship name??? idk#someone tell me what it is ill owe u my life
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You & Me : chapter 30
A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA
Sequel to AM CONVERSATIONS
CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21 || CHAPTER 22 || CHAPTER 23 || CHAPTER 24 || CHAPTER 25 || CHAPTER 26 || CHAPTER 27 || CHAPTER 28Â || CHAPTER 29
NOTES:
-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -5.1k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.
- notes: i know its a long chapter but i didnt want to cut the smut scene. sometimes i feel like i go too far with smut but hey, you tell me. also well im slightly disappointed because i didnt really get many notes in the last chapter sooo hopefully this one doesnât flop? thank you!
if you want to be on the list of blogs i notify when this is updated, just message me :)
requests! : ok so i didnt add everything in the requests but i tried!!!
Chapter 30 : Her chapter
OLIVIA
The room was dark and we remained silent for a while, both lost in our thoughts. I was thinking about what he had asked me, wondering if I was ready to get back into a relationship and somehow, it was driving me insane. Was I ready? Could I just jump back into it and move on? If I did and realized I was not ready, would our relationship end up the way it ended the first time? I felt something twist in my stomach and held my breath as i teared up. All the emotions I had felt during that time apart from him came rushing down, invading my body and confusing me even more. I knew I couldn't go through that a second time, but I also was not sure it had anything to do with the official title we could give each other. In fact, if Niall left again right now, it would probably be just as bad. Thinking about losing him made me grip the sheets of the bed hard and I bit my bottom lip so hard I actually hurt myself. The truth was, I had fallen again. No wait, 'fallen' was not the right word. I never thought being in love gave me the sensation to fall. No, it was the opposite. Being in love made you feel like you flew so high, way over the clouds. The fall, however, could literally break your neck and kill you. That's how I had felt when Niall had broken up with me a year ago. That was what I never wanted to go through ever again. But here I was, laying next to the only man I was ever in love with, the only man I'd ever be in love with, risking my sanity once again. I had it so fucking bad I didn't know how to process everything and if he cut my wings again, who was going to save me this time?
Niall's hand reached for mine that was laying in between us and held it. I squeezed his fingers instead of the sheets and sighed low. How did he do that? How did he calm me down with a simple touch? Why did he have so much control over me, physically and mentally?
"I didn't want to make things awkward between us." he finally talked in a low tone, turning his head my way. "I also don't want to pressure you into anything. Maybe I shouldn't have turned this into sex earlier, in the bath tub but... it was the first way I found to make sure I didn't have a verbal diarrhea of all the things in my mind."
I turned my head his way too and let my eyes roam on his face. I could still see him well but the features I couldn't see in the darkness were engraved in my brain anyway. It was insane the amount of time I had spent watching him and I didn't even care that it sounded so pathetic.
"Why didn't you want to tell me about the thoughts in your head?" I asked in a soft tone.
"Because I don't think you're ready to hear them."
The first thing that came to my mind was to answer him that I was ready but my heart jumped in my chest and I realized he was right. Maybe I was not ready to find out about his deep thoughts, maybe I knew it would either hurt me or stress me even more than I already was.
"I'm sorry." I whispered, feeling myself tear up. "I'm such a mess, I know."
He turned his whole body my way and brought his free hand to my head, slipping his fingers in my hair before moving closer and kissing me gently.
"Don't apologize." he let out against my lips before kissing me again. "No one is blaming you for anything, I promise. You take your time, you take whatever time you need, and I'll be here the whole time, right by your side."
"Why, Niall?" I whispered, blinking a few times before shutting my eyes tight. "Why do you want to wait for me?"
"Because I'm in love with you. Because I can't fucking live without you. Because I'm convinced we're meant to be." he replied quickly but softly. "I've always known we were meant to be. I made a few mistakes but I never stopped loving you, not even a second. And I know I was stupid and selfish but I genuinely thought it was alright because at the end of the road, it was going to be only you and me."
I wanted to smile at the reference from his song but I couldn't. I knew he was a different man but it didn't change the fact that he took me for granted when he broke up with me, and that now that he had lived what he wanted to live, he just wanted me back. I shouldn't be so bitter about it but it was not easy and when his mouth found mine again, I wrapped my arm around his waist, turning to face him, and pulled him closer.
"I want to trust you." I admitted, trying not to cry. "But it's just so hard, Niall. My heart is all in, I hope you know that. But my head... my head remembers. My head won't let me forget."
"I know petal, I know." he whispered, bringing his mouth on mine again to kiss me harder. "I don't want you to forget. I'll wait. I'll wait until you forgive me completely, I'll wait to see if you'll ever want to forgive me at all." He kissed me deeply and i felt a wave of intense love for him wash over me. "I'll wait a few lifetimes if I have to."
We kissed deeper and he pulled me against him, pressing our bodies together as I felt tears on my cheeks. I didn't know why I was so emotional but crying made me feel better. Or maybe it was him. Or a bit of both. We fell asleep together and when I woke up, I was still pressed against him. I brought my lips to his again and he groaned, answer my kiss before letting his mouth run on my jaw and neck.
"We should go hiking today." he proposed in a low tone, making me frown.
The moment we had had the night before was gone but somehow, something still lingered between us, like an emotion or a strong connection, I was not sure.
"Hiking? Yea, okay. And then bungee jumping? Sky diving, perhaps?" I let out ironically, making him laugh.
"I'm talking about hiking, not extreme sports. Just hike up a mountain, a small one!" he quickly added, making me grimace.
"That fat ass of mine didn't grow for no reason, Niall. Sport isn't my thing." I added with a smile before his hand reached for my butt.
"In no way would I want this ass to go, but baby a bit of hiking isn't that big of a deal. I'm not asking you to come for a run with me." he pointed out.
I pulled away as he grabbed my ass tighter, making me smile more. I loved him so much I would have actually agreed to go for a run with him, but I didn't mention it.
"Fine." I replied, making his face illuminate suddenly. "But you wait for me at all times and if I want a break, we take a break."
"Deal!"
The hike to the top was not as tough as I thought it would be and since Niall knew how clumsy I was, he helped me every time he noticed I needed it. I loved feeling his hand in mine, even if only for a few seconds, and it always surprised me how strong he was. We stood at the top and I tried to catch my breath as I looked around. Despite being not that high, the sight was very nice and I suddenly felt happy that I agreed to that.
I pushed my hair behind my shoulders, now totally aware of how dirty it was, and rubbed the back of my hand on my sweaty forehead. Without thinking, I gripped Niall's fingers and didn't let go as I looked at the skyline. I felt him grip my fingers tighter but he remained silent for a while before taking his phone out. He let go of my fingers to take a few pictures but I still kept quiet until I finally turned around. My lips curled when I noticed he was taking a picture of me and I shook my head.
"Nop, none of that!" I let out with a chuckle as I took a few steps closer, putting my hand in front of my face. "I'm all sweaty and dirty."
"That's your best state!" he argued with a laugh when I realized he was actually filming.
"Oh my god, Niall stop filming!"
He laughed more and pulled me closer to kiss me. I let him press his mouth on mine and closed my eyes, perfectly aware that he was actually filming that kiss, too. I wanted to be annoyed but the truth was, I liked it. I wanted souvenirs of us, too, even if I already had a ton of those. He pulled his phone down, still kissing me, and he probably put it back in his pockets because I felt both his hands reach for my jaw and neck. I felt the salty taste of his skin on my tongue and it made my whole body throb. Everything about him was turning me on.
"Fuck, you taste so good." I whispered, making him smile against my lips.
"I'm all sweaty." he pointed out with a chuckle as I shrugged before he became serious again. "If we were a normal couple, I'd post that video on instagram with the caption 'I love her'. I'd post the picture I took of you with the skyline, too. I'd probably caption it with, 'the most beautiful sight' like the cheesy man I am and I'd be talking about you. I'd take a selfie of us right now and post it too. Our friends would like it and leave comments about how disgustingly sweet we are. My cousins would make fun of me. Louis would comment everything by laughing at us with a few emojis and curse words. And we wouldn't give a fuck because we'd know they'd just be jealous."
The thought made me sad but at the same time, his words were nice to hear. Sometimes, I allowed myself to imagine that we were both still living in Ireland together. We'd have normal jobs, hang out on the weekend, meet on wednesdays for a drink or two with our friends, and keep going to the movies only us two every friday night. Perhaps he would have fallen in love with me anyway, or I liked to believe it, and we'd buy a house together and probably a dog. We'd take long walks through the familiar streets and maybe fly to France once in a while to see my parents. I couldn't tell if this story was better than the one we were going through right now and I tried to convince myself that the context was different, but the feelings would be exactly the same. Would they, though? Would Niall really love me that way? Would we have drifted apart? Would he have found an other girl, a girl I probably knew, someone that went to school with us, someone I would be jealous of forever, even after I would have found someone, too?
I swallowed the lump in my throat, knowing I would never know, and just tilted my head as I stared at Niall. He looked amazing, as he always did, and I just sighed.
"I'd probably post a million of pictures of you, especially pictures of you when you fall asleep on the couch. I have tons of those on my phone."
He frowned and his lips parted as he pulled away a bit, his arms now around my waist. "No you don't!"
"I do! And they're password protected so don't even try to delete them!" I pointed out with a smile, making him grimace. "More seriously, Niall. I like our story. We're not a normal couple and it's alright. We're both very private anyway and everyone in the world getting a glimpse of us like we were some reality tv show to follow... I wouldn't like that."
"I know." he whispered, making me smile sadly.
"I barely post on social medias anyway, but apparently it was a 'good idea' to make them official and stuff. Not my idea."
He laughed. "Yea I sort of guessed." he admitted, bending down again to kiss me. "Okay how about I treat you to a nice restaurant now? Then we can end the night in our incredible motel room, what do you say?"
"And I'll show you the surprise I brought." I added with a smirk. Immediately, he frowned and I chuckled. "Don't worry, you'll like it."
The whole time it took us to go back to the car, I spent it thinking about what he had talked about. Us being a normal couple and doing normal things together. It was all a fantasy, but it was still interesting to imagine.
We agreed that we needed a shower first and quickly took one together before getting dressed. I was surprised neither of us had tried to start something in the shower but I really wanted to build the lust between us and perhaps, that's what he wanted to.
The restaurant was crowded and I just hoped no one would recognize us. Niall asked for a table far from the door and we ended up in a corner and hidden from most people, which made me feel slightly better. I proposed to sit so he was facing the wall to make sure he wouldn't be recognized and finally, we asked for a bottle of wine and ordered our meals. I felt uncomfortable in the dress I had picked and realized that I hadn't actually worn something like that in a while, except for the wedding we went to. Niall never complained about the clothes I would wear and that was nice. He always had a nice comment when I was wearing a dress or a skirt but he also made a few raunchy comments when I was in sweatpants so I was not sure it had anything to do with the clothes.
"You look gorgeous." he just said, making me smile as I brought my glass to my lips.
"I love what you're wearing, too." I pointed out, raising my eyebrows.
His suit was a lighter blue than what I was used to and it looked nice on him. I stared at the chain on his neck and tilted my head, enjoying the fact that he was not wearing a tie.
"I'm very glad you love showing your chest hair because I really love seeing it."
He laughed more than I expected as he filled my glass again.
"You know what I love? You. Naked. Laying on a bed and ready for me." he whispered with a smirk.
"That's very very dirty of you." I chuckled, taking a sip. "Are you trying to get me drunk?"
"You're the one who gets very dirty when you're drunk." he pointed out with a smile. "But no, I'm not. Are you gonna tell me what's the surprise you brought?"
"If I tell you, you may want to skip dessert."
"I skip desserts often now, I'm not 15 anymore." he rolled his eyes with a smile.
"Try more 20. You love dessert." I raised my nose up before pressing my lips together. I watched him as he looked down at his plate and took a bite of his food before taking a sip of wine. "Handcuffs. I brought handcuffs."
I didn't expect that but he literally choked on his wine, making me laugh. I tried to hide it by biting my bottom lips and he finally cleared his throat. I felt bad when I saw his eyes water but he finally found his breath back and blinked a few times, staring at me.
"Why?"
"The other day you said you wanted me all tied down." I just shrugged. "I just thought it was worth a try."
He stared at me again and I stared back, my smile turning into a fond one as I tilted my head.
"You're ready to try anything, aren't you?"
"Almost, yea." I admitted, shrugging only one shoulder this time. "If it turns you on then, i'm in!"
"That gives me so many thoughts." he admitted with a laugh and I could swear he started eating quickly after that.
I finished my plate and when his eyes met mine again, I smiled more. I meant what I had said, I was ready to try many things with him, whether it was sexual or not, and the thought of loving each other with so much distance between us like we would have to do very soon made me hold my breath. That, too, I was ready to try. And he had promised he wouldn't see anyone else, which reassured me more than I thought it would. Was I starting to trust him again?
"You're right. We're gonna skip dessert." he finally let out, making me laugh again.
We finally asked cakes to go and he left the bag near the door as soon as we walked in the room. His lips found mine and I kissed him back, chuckling against his mouth as we stumbled around to reach the bed.
"You think someone saw us today?" I asked low, pushing his jacket off his shoulders as it fell on the carpet with a thud.
"No, we're good at this. You know what else we're good at?" he replied, letting two of his fingers slip in the front of my dress to pull it down. "Fuck, you're not wearing a bra."
"I knew you'd like it." I mentioned with a smile, unbuttoning his shirt and pushing it off his shoulders before working on his pants. "How bad do you want to use me?"
His eyes found mine and I could swear I saw something in his facial expression, something brutal, rough, something that came from instinct, something visceral, as if he wanted to grab me by the throat and use me until I'd beg him to stop.
I reached for the zipper of my dress and squirmed out of it before taking a step back and moving my panties down. He just stared at me, shirtless with his pants unzipped, and all I could think about was him on top of me, making me cum over and over again. He looked at me like he was literally going to jump on me and I tilted my head, nibbling on my bottom lip but staying out of reach.
"They're in the front pocket of my bag." I just mentioned.
It took him a few seconds but he finally found them as I sat on the bed, my heart accelerating as he walking closer. It was the very first time I would allow someone to do something like that to me and even if it was making me nervous, it was also extremely exciting.
"Are you sure you're ready to let me do that?"
I swallowed hard and nodded. "Mmhm, I trust you."
I did. I trusted him with my body. I trusted that he would make me cum good, that he wouldn't do anything that I didn't want to, even if I was tied up, and I trusted that he wouldn't just leave me there or anything like that.
He made me lay down on my back and used the handcuffs to tie me to the bed before letting his eyes roam on my body for a few seconds. The position was not uncomfortable but I knew it was going to be hard not to move at all.
"If at any moment you want me to untie you, or if you hurt, you tell me, okay?" I nodded and his eyes moved on my legs. "Fuck I wish I could tie your legs too. If you move them too much I'm gonna spank you so fucking hard you won't be able to sit for a week."
His words made my heart jump in my chest and he moved closer to the bed, his hand slipping between my legs and reaching my pussy.
"Just tie one of my legs with a pair of sweatpants."
His eyes found mine as his eyebrows raised. "Are you serious?"
He looked surprised but I just nodded and quickly, he did what I proposed. The knot was not really tight and if I moved enough, I could probably untie it, but when he brought his hand back between my legs, I felt totally submitted to him. He pushed his pants down with his free hand and my lips parted when I saw his hard cock spring out of his pants. I had no idea why I was so turned on by him but I suddenly started thinking about all these years I thought about him on top of me, late at night, back when he didn't even see me as a potential lover.
"You're so fucking wet. And impatient." he pointed out, running his fingers up my stomach and leaving a wet trace on my skin before going back between my legs. His pushed his fingers inside me and I let out a whimper, feeling my eyes flutter. "Fuck, I don't know how I'm gonna last. Just the sight of you all tied up is making me so fucking hard."
I watched him bring his hand to his cock, rubbing it with my wetness until it was coated and despite myself, I let out a short whimper. He moved closer to me, rubbing the tip of his cock on my lips and quickly, I wrapped my lips around his tip. He grabbed the back of my head to hold it and pushed his cock in my mouth, making me choke before pulling back.
"That sound is fucking amazing." he pointed out before doing it again.
I choked one more time but the more he did it, the more used I was getting and when he finally pulled away completely, I swallowed hard and panted. My heart was beating hard but I was not sure if it was because of lust or because it stressed me a bit to be in this situation.
"Stick your tongue out." he ordered before tapping his cock a few times on it. "Look at me."
My gaze quickly found his and he groaned, rubbing his cock on my tongue for about a minute before moving away. My eyes followed him as he took his pants off completely along with his socks and got on the bed, between my legs. He let both his hands run on my legs and my thighs before reaching my pussy he bent down just to suck on my clit for a while, making my eyes roll back in my head as I moaned. Slowly, he crawled on top of me and fingered me slowly as his thumb rubbed on my clit.
"You're mine, yea?" he asked, looking straight in my eyes as my lips parted. "Say it."
My eyes fluttered as I felt an orgasm build in my stomach and he probably felt me clench around his fingers because he quickly took his hand away and I let out a moan in protest.
"You're mine."
"Mm, I'm yours."
I thought about that time he fingered me in my room for the first time in months, and I remembered he had asked me the same thing. I never thought Niall was an insecure person and I knew it was probably just because the fact that I belonged to him turned him on, but it was also right after he found out about Louis and I.
I thought he'd push his fingers back inside me but instead, he moved up, placing his knees on each sides of my chest before brushing his cock on my mouth. It throbbed on my lips and the thought was so hot that I almost came. He started jerking off, his tip hitting my lips before I finally opened them and sucked on it again. He groaned, pulling his cock up and I whimpered as I ran my tongue on his balls, taking one in my mouth and sucking on it. This time, he let out a moan and started grinding against me.
"Fuck, your mouth always drives me so fucking crazy."
He moved back, rubbing his cock on one of my tits before taking place between my legs again and rubbing the tip of his cock on my clit. I squirmed, unable to move, and pulled on my arms. The handcuffs made a light noise against the bars of the bed and he looked up.
"Gentle. You don't want to hurt your wrists do you?" he asked, raising his eyebrows as a smirk draw itself on his lips. "I know you want to cum but a little edging has never killed anyone, yeah?"
I hated edging. I knew the whole point but Niall was a tease and being so close to cum over and over again was torture for me. Clearly, it turned him on though and I bit my bottom lip very hard.
"You look so desperate." he added. "Look at you, fuck."
"Please, please fuck me."
His eyes moved up to look into mine and he seemed surprised by my plea. "I love when you beg me."
Instead to do as I implored, he slid a finger on my slit and pushed it in my ass, making me squirm again. "I haven't done that since the last time I did it with you."
I held my breath, my heart suddenly racing, and he added two fingers in my pussy to fuck me slowly. I could feel his hard cock press against one of my thighs and I just wanted him deep inside me.
"You let anyone else fuck your ass this year?" he wondered as I quickly shook my head. "Good girl. I promise I'll make you cum harder than anyone ever has."
I tried to relax and my eyes fluttered when I felt the tip of his cock push against my ass. I breathed in and let out a few curse words when it was finally in, opening my eyes to look at him again. He spit in his hand and brought it to his cock. I felt him jerk off a bit before pushing the rest of his dick inside me and bringing his hand up, rubbing his thumb quickly on my clit at the same time.
"The way you throb around me... fuck, I don't know how long I'm gonna last."
He focused on what he was doing, pushing himself in and out of me slowly as I wiggled and whimpered. He was bringing me so close to an orgasm and when he felt I was about to cum, he moved his hand away from my pussy and pushed himself deeper in my ass.
"Niall please, please make me cum."
I didn't expect him to start fucking me harder but he did and even if he wasn't touching me anymore, I knew I was about to cum.
"Jesus fucking christ,"
I felt him shake as he got an orgasm but he pulled out of me and continued to cum on my pussy, bringing his thumb on my clit and rubbing it quickly with his sperm and making me reach immediately my own peak. I shook and cursed, feeling him rub his tip on my thigh, spreading more of his orgasm on me.
It took me a few seconds before I finally opened my eyes and I smiled when he lied down on top of me to kiss me. His lips moved slowly against mine but it's only when I pulled on my arms again that he chuckled against my mouth.
"Alright, alright. I'm untying you."
He started by my ankle and finally undid the handcuffs, bringing one of my wrists to his lips and kissing it gently. He moved back over me to kiss me again and I wrapped my arms around his neck, trapping him with my thighs on each sides of his waist.
"You're such a tease." I chuckled in his mouth.
"Hey that was the whole point." he argued with a small laugh. "Was good?"
"Mmhm, definitely."
After a few minutes, he sighed and moved away. "I really need to pee, I'm sorry."
I laughed and waited until he came back to go to the bathroom too and clean myself. When I joined him back in bed, the lights were off and he was under the sheets. I quickly cuddled his side and he wrapped his arm around me. We remained in silence and once again, a wave of love flooded inside me. It was always that way, late at night, when I was in his arms, and I was scared it would drive me insane to not be able to cuddle him at night when he'll be away.
"Thank you for trusting me." he whispered. "I really hope someday you can trust me again with your heart, and not just with your body."
I licked my lips, not really sure of what to answer. I knew the post-orgasm feeling was making me a bit euphoric but I wanted to tell him that I would. I wanted to tell him he just needed to be patient again... just for a very short time period. I wanted to tell him that I knew I would eventually give myself to him completely again, that he would definitely have the chance to break me again, to hurt me in a way no one else could hurt me. Instead, I swallowed my words and closed my eyes.
"I'm gonna fucking miss you, Niall." I whispered, knowing my voice would crack if I talked louder. I closed my eyes and swallowed the lump in my throat, feeling something stir in my stomach. He kissed the top of my head and I didn't know if I was going to be able to stop myself from crying. His voice reached my ear in a soft murmur and I hugged him tighter.
"Not as much as I'll miss you."
#niall horan#niall horan fluff#niall horan smut#niall horan fanfic#niall horan fan fic#niall horan fanfiction#niall horan fan fiction#niall horan writing#niall horan story#my fanfics#yam
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I mean no offense in asking this but what about that "curry" song is offensive? Is curry not an important dish in Indian culture and eating beef against the majority religion of India (Hinduism)?
dude... are you kidding?? have you been reading any of the posts?
*sigh* ok. since u asked so nicely, let me spell it out for you. and for anyone who has been too afraid to ask bc they really should have caught on by now.
first, have a look at this post i made, where i talk abt what south asians face generally. in that post, i put a screenshot of some of the lyrics of that song. first of all, the whole tone of those words is extremely unsettling to me - two Korean men making a song about a culture that they're literally not a part of. like, don't even say "appreciation". if you want to appreciate my culture and food, just eat the fucking food??
but that's not even the main thing. the thing that quite literally made my stomach drop was .... i can't even bring myself to quote it accurately but, smth like "if two people were eating curry and one dropped dead, the other wouldn't notice"?? smth along those lines.
so you're telling me that you like eating indian curry so much that you went wrote an unnecessary song about it, and proceeded to make a disgusting joke about how made it smells??? comparing it to a literal corpse?? what the fuck???
and yes, i know this song was made in 2010 and the original artists have now apologised for making it. but it took them 10 years??? really??? other groups have done this before, btw. stray kids and oh my girl, as far as i can remember. and when they did this, their fans also spoke up about it. im not quite sure what the groups did in response, but, clearly this has been an issue within the last 10 years. but only NOW the original artists realised that they majorly fucked up by making this song??
and dont even get me started on their apology. it was full of "we love indian culture we just wanted to make a fun and catchy song about it". norazo, you didnt just do that. you made a song by taking random 'buzz' words from our culture ("shanti", "TAJ MAHAL", "namaste" and all that shit), referenced random things that we abide by without context (eating with the right hand, no beef etc.), and descriptions of curry that you thought were funny ("its yellow, but it doesn't smell nice" or some shit. again, these arent direct quotes because i refuse to look those lyrics up again.)
what you need to understand, anon, is that this is the worst way you could appreciate someone's culture. that song is made by people who clearly know nothing further and deeper about our culture and traditions past "taj mahal" and "namaste". they think it's hilarious that our food tastes so great but smells so shit. you mean to tell me they loooove our culture, but then thought it was okay to take random hindu terminology which has a deeper meaning and relevance, and just throw them in a song about curry??
by now, i really hope you're seeing why the existence of this song is deeply unsettling. but there's more of a problem here. clearly, over the recent years of kpop groups' controversial encounters with this song, svt never realised that the song is offensive. they've had the luxury of not learning why this song is stupid and derogatory and berating to our culture. they've been able to ignore the fact that south asians across the world are misunderstood and discriminated against because people like norazo reduce our culture to these songs with no meaning other than to """appreciate""" something in the worst way possible.
and that's the worst part to me. svt clearly dont have to care about racism and the struggles of other asians. they're famous and rich and they have a korean fanbase to rely on, so they dont have to care about the struggles of international fans. but south asian culture is REPEATEDLY used in kpop for the aesthetic - there are so many examples of this that you could probably Google it and find a plethora of kpop controversies explained by south asians.
and you know why this keeps happening?? because culturally, in korea, people aren't understanding why shit like this is dumb and wrong. when it comes to idols and their companies, they're either ignoring the uproar (like pledis), or making a half assed apology and then proceeding to appropriate and diminish another culture for their next comeback. so yeah, svt and other idols aren't forced to care about this shit, but they need to start caring. and if they don't, i and a lot of other south asian fans aren't gonna keep loving and supporting and paying them just for them to turn around and slap us in the face by perpetuating harmful and stupid stereotypes of us.
my friend v made a good post here which explains how kpop has brought global east asian rep and broke stereotypes, and now we need the same for south asian cultures. we have an incredibly beautiful and rich cultural background, but when people make songs like this and idols sing them and find them catchy or funny, they reduce our cultures to a couple words and stereotypes. they make us feel small. insignificant past being people that eat smelly curry with our fucking right hand. i am more than that. south asians are more than that. and at this point, i don't even know if svt, the people whom I've given so much love, know that.
I'd like to believe that they had no racist intentions. but that frankly doesn't matter either way. they fucked up by singing that song and seeing nothing wrong with it. and they're still fucking up by staying silent about it. and this is gonna allow some rookie group to make the same fucking mistake in the future, and the cycle repeats, and south asians are continually discriminated and made to feel shit about themselves because of some song that their favourite idols can't stop singing no matter how many times they're told to.
lastly, if you've read all of this and decided that south asian fans are being dramatic and we're "cancelling ppl for no reason", just send me another ask saying so. then I'll block your IP address.
alternatively, if you have a genuine question about this, if my wording didn't make sense at any point, my inbox is open. but pls be polite. it's the least i ask for.
you can refer to this post which is pinned on my page which has resources you can use to contact pledis and tell them to make an apology statement and urge svt to understand their mistake + inform themselves on this issue.
#asks#answered#anonymous#anon i just woke up and spent 30 mins writing that for you lmao pls be thankful#svt sitch.#ok to rb!
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Say You Love Me || iii
pairings: peter parker x fem!reader
summary: reader and peter went out and had fun times!
warnings: insecure reader? flUFFFS, explicit language (a bit)
gif credit: tomholandd
part i part ii part iii part iv part v
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your back slides down on apartment door, your face were red. you were feeling happy but you also felt mad at Peter. it was a bit inconsiderate of him to just waltz back into your life as if nothing happened between the two of you but at the same time you couldnât help but be happy that you got your best friend back.
you took out your phone from your bag to call MJ. ring... ring... ring... âhello?â MJ greets, you said âhey, i think i just made the biggest mistake of my life,â you stand up from your position to sit on a more comfortable spot. âwhat did you do, y/!?â MJ asked in a very concerned voice.
you explained everything to her, âi donât think my input would be valid, honestly, but i do think that you should set some sort of boundaries between the two of you so the same thing wouldnt happened again,â MJ advices. to be fair, she was right, when you told her about how Peter rejected you, she called Peter a dickhead and she was angrier at it than you were.
what you need to do is set some boundaries. of course you want everything to be normal back but if it meant getting your heart break for the second time, is it even worth it?â you thanked MJ for the advice and ended the call.
you laid out on your couch just thinking about Peter. itâs not that you still like Peter. well, a bit. but he hasnt crossed your mind since today at that cafĂ©. you were doing perfectly fine. but the thought of him suddenly liking you back is also a possibility.
ugh, look at me, you groaned to yourself. how pathetic could you be? you have everything that you ever wanted in this whole world. your own studio apartment thats filled with your art equipments and not to mention a bunch of your arts are still at the 3 months long exhibition. you ccouldnât be more happy. you just dont get how you feel like you need someone to make you even happier?
the thought of not being so lonely sounds amazing but you werenât sure you were ready for that commitment again.
*ăïŸïœ„*:.ïœĄ..ïœĄ.:*'(*ïŸâœïŸ*)'*:.ïœĄ. .ïœĄ.:*ăïŸïœ„*
it was officially the day of the meet up. the âiâm getting back with my friend after i screwed everything upâ meet up. you were kinda mad at yourself for promising to meet up with him. you were so nervous, you swore that your fingers are literally trembling from the fear of whatâs going to happen.
you walked into the shower and try to give yourself some pep talks. practice some conversation stater or conversation fillers that you may or may not have. you wiped the fog from your mirror and take a good look at yourself. this is it, y/n, you can still cancel on him but if you do cancel on him, youâre going to look like a huge asshole, you took a deep breath and decided to put on your best face.
you picked out a leather jacket with a black top and pair it with some denim washed jeans. you put on some makeup because letâs be honest, you look kinda dead due to you not being able to sleep peacefully for the last few nights. itâs not a surprise on the reason why you couldnât sleep. putting on a last touch your face, you put down your lipstick and look at yourself, not too bad, time to show Peter what he lost.
your phone rings without looking at the caller id, you picked it up, âhello?â you said, to which you then heard a familiar voice, âhey y/n! iâm waiting by the stairs of your apartment!â you were shocked that he still had your number. sure, six months wasnât that long but it was long enough for you to forget some things about himâ âoh! iâll be right down there. just a sec, Pete.â you said.
you opened the front door of your apartment building to see him in his black and yellow jacket. âwoah, someoneâs looking cute as ever,â after you blushed at his comment, you suddenly reminded yourself that he was only messing around. you tried to not make it awkward by complimenting him too, âyou donât look half as bad as you used to, Parkerâ you smirked whilst looking up and down at him. he throws his hand in a âaw stop it youâ gesture.
âwhat are we gonna do today, Pete?â you looked at his face, awaiting for his answer, âwhat? why me? you were the one who set this up!â he said in confusion, you laughed at him and said ânah, iâm just messing with you, Parker. weâre going to the art exhibitionâ you then jokingly added âso i can brag to you about how iâm doing much better in life than you will ever be,â he scoffed at you âpsh, have you tried saving the planet from aliens?â
ah, yes, you remembered when you guys blipped from the world. it was a crazy experience, though it was pretty upsetting that we had lost one of the greatest superhero, Iron Manâ you giggled at his remarked. once the two of you arrived at the exhibition, the both of you headed inside and straight to where your paintings are held.
you looked up brightly to your own paintings. stil couldnât believe that a small girl like you could make it out here. you noticed Peter started taking up on the details too, especially the painting whereâs theres a boy and girl who looks just like the two of you. he pointed at that one and asked, âwhatâs that painting about?â
it was a girl lying down on the boyâs lap while heâs feeding her grapes. it looks so elegant and you have to say itâs one of your best paintings. you loved it because it reminded the time when you went through a similar situation with him. just lazing around on the couch feeding each other snacks while reading books and listening to songs.
âwell, theyâre together which is obvious, i guess. lying on the couch with your significant other while doing something is such an intimate moment, in my opinion. you get to sit and talk about your day, your future and anything. i feel as if the world is small whenever iâm doing that,â you explained to Pete, you noticed that he looks at you throughout your explanation.
you grabbed his hand to lead you to the other paintings by other painters. you pointed at the scribblish one which you canât quite describe what it was. itâs funny how even a scribblish painting could make it to an exquisite exhibition. âcan you try explaining this one to me?â Peter jokingly asks, pointing to the painting that you had just pointed. you chuckled at him and said âyeah, itâs your brain whenever youâre trying to process something simple.â his smiled turned into a frown real quick earning a âhey!â from him.
you looked at Peter with a worried face and shook his arm, âi-is everything alright, y/n?â you looked down at your feet and shake your head, no, he was starting to get worried, âwhatâs wrong?! is everything okay?!â he asked, you looked up to his eyes and said âiâm hungry,â he once again rolls his eyes trying hard to not be mad at you, âgod, you made me worried sick for a second there, y/n.â you snorted at him, poking fun of how his face looked.
*ăïŸïœ„*:.ïœĄ..ïœĄ.:*'(*ïŸâœïŸ*)'*:.ïœĄ. .ïœĄ.:*ăïŸïœ„*
you two went to the nearest bagel shop as Peter was craving bagels eventhough you were the one whoâs hungry. you ordered the classic bagel with cream cheese and Peter ordered the same too. the whole time you were queuing with him, he made you laughed. to your surprise, it wasnât as awkward as you thought it would be. it was going so well, you didnt want this moment to end.
Peter grabbed his and yours order while you were looking for a table to sit. you found a table right outside next to the window of the bagel bakery. he came right up at you and said âone cream cheese bagel and black coffee with three sugar for a sweetheart,â you melted at his words thinking that it was for you but it turns out he didnt finished his sentence just yet âand one cream cheese bagel and hot tea for y/nâ if you had to roll your eyes one more time at is dumb jokes, you swear you werent gonna see the light of day again
âso, howâs Jane?â you addressed the elephant in the room. his smiled went into a frown as quick as sugar dissolves into a liquid. âshe... she and i broke up a month after i... you know,â he said not wanting to bring up the topic of him rejecting you but needless to say, you were quite shocked. why didnt he messaged you after that happened to atleast confide in a friend.
you spoke âiâm so sorry, Pete. why didnât you messaged me, though? i couldâve done everything that i could to cheer you up,â you immediately closed your mouth with both of your hands, regretting that you had said that. heâs gonna think you only care ahout yourself, âwell i was going to but i figured that you didnt want to hear anything from me,â you sighed at his words and reassure him that you always want to hear from him whether it was good or bad. he smiled at your kind words
you sipped your tea and continued to make your conversations alive once again after you decided to ruin it by asking him a dumb question.
*ăïŸïœ„*:.ïœĄ..ïœĄ.:*'(*ïŸâœïŸ*)'*:.ïœĄ. .ïœĄ.:*ăïŸïœ„*
it was now 6:30pm, you were parting your ways with Peter. he had to run off to buy a couple of things for Aunt May, you wanted to accompany him but he insisted that he can and constantly brings up about how Spider-Man can do it on his own. what a cheeky bastard.
you arrived home and settled down for a minute before opening your laptop to check your emails. you head to your fridge to make yourself a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich. you had to admit eating bagels didnt exactly fill up your hunger but you werenât feeling like eating a lot. you sat on your study desk and took out your laptop.
you typed in your email address and password, once youâve signed in, this particular email caught your eyes, you clicked on it and read it.
âDear y/n l/n,
We, from ArtSix company, would like to fly you over to Paris, France to work with us. We are a group of artists who would try to find interesting jobs for painters and offer them, just like you are being right now. We would like to pay the amount of One Thousand Five Hundred American Dollars for you to paint something in honour of Oscar-Claude Monet. This job would require you to move to France, if you are interested in taking it.
Would love to hear from you, soon.
Best regards, ArtSixâ
you were shocked, you couldnât believe your eyes. someone had offer to give you a job! finally, youâll be able to earn good money while doing something you love! just sitting at home and ask your parents for money isnt doing you any good or rather at most times doing small jobs like being a waiter at a restaurant isnt doing any good. your apartment rent was getting expensive, anyways.
this might be your chance to get a fresh start! you texted MJ about the news and she said âcongratulations!! we definitely have to trade paintings before you leave for đ«đ·!!â you shoot back a gif that says âduhâ but suddenly it hits you, how are you going to tell Peter? will he be happy for you or will he beg for you to stay?
*ăïŸïœ„*:.ïœĄ..ïœĄ.:*'(*ïżœïżœâœïŸ*)'*:.ïœĄ. .ïœĄ.:*ăïŸïœ„*
a/n; aAAA UH OH READER IS GOING TO FRANCE WHATS GOING TO HAPPEN NEXT,, also if its not obvious,, reader is in denial skdjskfks
say you love me taglist! (dont be afraid to ask to be tagged! also iâm tagging some of yall who i think have been reading from the first chapter :-) and gave such kind criticism )
@imawkwardandhereweare @canyonmoonspidey @thebadassbitchqueen @thequeenreaders
#peter parker#peter parker angst#peter parker x reader#marvel cinematic universe#mcu#tom holland#tom holland x reader
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91 + lashton !!! đ
anonymous  asked:
Can you do 12 with Lashton? It's been too long since I read one about them đ
Lashton (5sos) + 91. âYou look beautiful in the moonlight.â + 12. âI think youâre forgetting somethingâŠâ
Canon Universe, set somewhere in 2017, while working on the album Youngblood.
~1,642 words
A/N:Â Hi guys!! Ok, i literally gasped when i read number 91 and you both asked for lashton just one after the other and oh god the memories!! I hope you dont mind i put these two together, i had so much fun writing this thank you so much! honestly!!! i love you both thank you so so so much for this! i didnt proof read, so im very sorry for mistakes.
i hope you like it! let me know xx
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âWhat are you doing?â
With a sudden jolt, Lukeâs fingers slip from the strings of the guitar heâs holding, and thereâs a gasped âJesus!â that escapes his lips as Ashtonâs voice breaks the silence.
The older boy makes an amused sound as he steps out onto the balcony anyway, âsorry didnât mean to startle you or anything.â
Luke shakes his head ââS alright, I thought everyone was asleep already,â he justifies.Â
âIs that why youâre out here in the dark?â Ashton asks as he steps out to the large balcony out of the living room. Itâs a temporary place theyâre staying at - someoneâs holiday house or some shit, for the couple of days theyâre supposed to hang around for work.Â
Itâs nice though, and although away from the confusion of the city this particular spot has a great view over its lights.
Luke looks up at Ashton from where heâs sitting on the floor, against the wall. âDidnât want to wake anyone up,â Luke says.
Ashton turns to him, smiles a little âyouâre lucky I didnât lock you out by mistake.â
Luke lets out a chuckle, âeh, itâs not that cold out here and thereâs a lot of floor to sleep on.â Ashton scoffs, as he moves to sit down next to Luke on the floor.
âI think youâre forgetting something, Liz would still absolutely kick my ass if I was the reason you caught a cold,â Ashton says, and it makes Luke laugh with his whole body, guitar to the side as the doubles over a little. And Ashton smiles.
Lukeâs laugh, the genuine kind is so rare these days that Ashton feels his chest fill up with something warm anytime he hears it. Itâs such a welcome change from the quiet, frustrated, sulking, hurt version of Luke heâs been living around these last weeks.Â
His laughs dies down slowly and Ashton leans into him, bumping him with his shoulder a little, asks âare you okay?â in a quiet, careful tone. He needs to ask.Â
Ashton knows thatâs a dumb question because, no, Luke isnât okay, Luke hasnât been okay for the longest time after that girl entered his life, made a mess of it, and then left leaving everything burning in her wake. Ashton has been living with him for some time now, and he knows, he sees that Luke isnât okay and thatâs why he needs to ask.
Luke sighs, takes the guitar and leans his head back against the wall. Takes his time to answer, âYeah, I just had this melody in my headâŠâ he trails off, bites his lip as he stares into the horizon, âwas trying to find more words for it.â
Ashton looks over at him âmore?â incites him to share.
Luke gives him a smile, itâs soft and itâs sad. He looks down at his lap, ââwish we had never met, wish I knew how to erase youââ
Ashtonâs feels his heart sink. His eyes donât leave Lukeâs face, look all over his profile and this angers creeps up on him, this frustration and most of all this helplessness. Itâs so unfair. Itâs so fucking unfair that he sees Luke like this everyday, that heâs right here next to him and somehow canât help him, no matter what he does.
âLuke,â he whispers, his hand falls on Lukeâs leg, squeezes a little in reassurance just above his knee, because obviously he knows who this is about. He wishes he could pluck her from Lukeâs memory with his own hands.
Luke hums, scrunches up his face and shakes his head ever so slightly, telling Ashton to let it be, that he doesnât really need to say anything, instead continues, âIt doesnât fit right into the melody, though,â Luke says instead, forcing this light tone that doesnât match the tension in the air at all, âthe metric of it isnât right.â
Ashton turns back to look at Luke, and his chest is still aching and his hands are still itching to take all that pain away from his brain.Â
And then he figures Luke is already trying to do that - with mismatched words to a melody in his head and a guitar in his lap.
He swallows and takes a breath, says âwhatâs it sounding like?â
Luke shakes his head again, âI canât make the words fit.â
âJust the melody then,â Ashton replies, voice soft and his hand lost still on Lukeâs leg, âIâll help you fit them.â
In silence, Luke turns his head searches Ashtonâs face with his brow furrowed and he knows just then that this is about more than just this one song. He feels this wave of appreciation filling him up, a sudden rush of affection and gratitude and even guilt as he looks at Ashton and thinks about how heâs been keeping him from falling apart like the broken mess he feels for the longest time.
He starts humming the melody in his head softly, works out the chords to it and after a while of repeating it, Ashton hums with him as he looks up at the sky instead.
âWish weâd never metâŠâ Luke sings softly, fitting it to the melody after a little, trails off, and Ashton perks up a little, asks him to repeat it and he does.
â...wish I knew how to forget,â Ashton sings, and it fits. They look at each other and Luke smiles a little, again that soft but sad smile that doesnât quite reach his eyes, and he sings again.
âNow I wish weâd never met, cause youâre too hard to forget,â his fingers stop moving over the strings, Ashtonâs eyes shoot up searching his face again and Luke bites his lip, closes his eyes as his breathing comes out ragged and unsteady.
âLuke,â Ashton starts, doesnât really know what to say, turns his body towards Luke just as he other boy takes the guitar and puts it to the side with a mumbled fuck under his breath that Ashton catches anyway.
Luke brings his hands to his face, elbows supported on his bent knees and rubs at it for a second as if chasing his thoughts away and Ashtonâs hand comes up to his arm this time around. âHey man, itâs alright,â he whispers, trying to reassure him.
After a second, Luke takes his face off his hands to look up at the sky instead - Ashton can see, with a brow furrowed in worry, how shiny his eyes look.Â
Once again, that helplessness crawls under his skin and he wants to hold him.
âWhy is everything so much more fucked at night?â Luke says instead, in this quiet, thoughtful tone of voice, still looking up at the stars, âwhy does everything ugly come out when itâs dark?â
The hand that Ashton had on his arm slides down to his hands instead, âI donât think itâs ugly. Itâs raw and that makes it scary,â he says in the same quiet voice, gives Lukeâs hand another reassuring squeeze. Luke catches it just as heâs letting go.
âItâs still messy.â Thereâs something in Lukeâs eyes as he turns his head to look at Ashton. The older boy holds his gaze and feels his heart crack a little bit more as he sees the hurt and heartbreak and anger in his eyes. âIâm messy and so fucked up.â
And that, right there, is the reason why the frustration and anger creeps up on Ashton from time to time from seeing Luke like this. How can someone deliberately do this to another person? Fuck their trust up so bad, throw them into this never ending cycle of heartbreak and anger and self loathing and insecurities and somehow never leave their mind?
How is it fair?
How come she gets to break Lukeâs heart into a million pieces, get away with it, and still sheâs all he can think about?
Ashton hates it. Sheâs the one putting these thoughts in his mind, sheâs the reason he thinks heâs broken now, that all thatâs left after her are the ugly incomplete parts. Ashton hates it so much.
âItâs real, Luke.â he says, instead, pulls at Lukeâs hand and makes him turn his body a little bit as he perks up himself, detaching from the wall to face Luke completely. âItâs real, it means that youâre trying to heal. Itâs not going to be dark forever. Youâre not irreparably broken, youâre not messed up, and I still think you look beautiful, in the moonlight.â
They fall quiet. Luke is staring at Ashton, his mouth slightly open, like he wants to say something. Their hands are still clasped together and neither one is moving for a second, before Ashton with a pink colour rising to his cheeks breaks eye contact first and pulls to take his hands back. Luke holds on to them.
âNo, wait,â he says suddenly. He canât get hold of his thoughts, not really, but his body is moving forward, âwait,â he whispers again, soft, watching Ashton watch him come closer his chest rising and falling faster than before. That wave of affection washes over Luke once again and he doesnât really know what to do with himself, feels it overflowing and he canât think properly.
âLuke,â Ashton whispers back, like a warning, so soft. It has no heat, not really, and Luke repeats âwait,â begging him to keep that thought on hold, to hold it for a few seconds to just⊠wait.
His lips touch Ashtonâs slowly first. The tiniest of touches and Ashtonâs eyes flutter shut as he exhales like heâs been holding a gasp in.
Then, in a sudden move, Ashtonâs hands come to Lukeâs neck and both boys move to crash against each other in a heated kiss, holding on to each other.
And itâs raw, itâs scary, itâs messy.
But it feels real.
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Better Than Before. | KSJ 18+
pairing: Ex!Seokjin x Reader
genre: smut, BDE!Jin, a pinch of Angst., what is Humor?
words: 3.1K
warnings: none :)
summary: why is that everytime you attmept to be a social butterfly your ex-kim seokjin appears and youâre suddenly a raging alcoholic. AKA- seokjin is on a persistent mission to get you alone again.
song inspiration: âAlwaysâ by Arin Ray
*** ***
Youâve never been the type of person to attend big celebration or even stay afterwards for further socializing. But you either had to choose between another Saturday spent watching re-runs of old sitcoms or actually going out to do something with your life and seeing as you were a full fledged nurse with barely enough time to take a piss⊠yeah it was probably time to interact with others.
The soft spot for your closest coworker had took it place once she asked for your assistance as a bridesmaid. An unfortunate event of one her friends getting extremely sick due to a spreading Flu had only ended with the poor thing being short just one person. Little did you know the sweet natured girl had actually considered you to be another close pal of her own and couldn't think of any other to put above asking you next. Originally you had planned to miss the event all in itself , even when you were just a guest. Practicing in your mirror to give the sweet girl a stern âhell noâ, but it's Fairly obvious to see by now that, that didn't go as planned.
The air felt hot, you were sure your dress had a huge sweat stain on the back and you couldn't control the throbbing need that was slowly making you delirious by the second.
âYou may now kiss the brideâ the words spoken by the elderly priest that stood only a feet away from you. You looked to him. a firm smile placed on his slightly chapped lips that had everyone cheering, including the beautiful couple who were currently leaning into each other to seal their vows of commitment. It was perfect to say nonetheless, all white spreading throughout the pure rustic styled garden and the sun was shining throughout the clear blue skies showcasing the Event in all itâs beauty . You wanted to bask in it and soak up the rare moment you were apart of , but there was no use .
No, Not when there's a pair of dark occupied eyes staring your body down throughout the entire celebration.
â I dont know whats more messed up. You- attending the same wedding as me or the fact that the next time I ever see you it's when you're in the same wedding as meâ the undeniably gorgeous man that youâve known as your Ex- Kim Seokjin- or well Jin pressed you into his side tighter just as you were following the groom and bride down flower filled path.
Wild light brown hair, pouty plump lips, and mischievous black eyes- If there was anything that made you regret going along with this decision, it was certainly him.
âSeokjin. Let. me. Go.â the venomous words slid through your teeth just as you waved towards the ederly woman in one of the rows and whom you could only assume was the groomâs grandmother.
âsheesh , still bitter I seeâ He glances down at you, a firm smirk still in its place when he does not-so-exactly as you wished. His long arm that was pressing you rather possessively into his waist loosened its hold and only came to grab your soft empty hand. It gave everyone the simple illusion that you two were a perfect couple when really you were anything but.
It was a couple of years ago in a situation similar to this one, youâd ended up attending a special occasion for an old colleague. It was a birthday party that your classmates happened to be throwing for seokjin and youâd reluctantly allowed your roommates to drag you there. There wasn't really much else to it since you could barely remember, you caved into downing 5 shots as you tried to drown out your boredom and completely blacked out. The only thing you could recall after that mysterious night , was waking up naked and sore next to the birthday boy himself. Youâve both only dated for a couple of months, when rumors of the popular boyâs conquests arose and you were in no mood to deal with them.
In other words- you dumped him.
âShot of whiskey and make it dark pleaseâ you smiled innocently towards the cute dimpled bartender who busied himself cleaning cups. He nods back at you, his blonde hair falling forward as he momentarily slid his eyes over you and you vice versa. He then rolls up his crisp white button up to lean towards you, your eyes running quickly over his name tag that read ânamjoonâ on it. âSure thing missâ he sends you a wink , just before turning to prepare the requested drink.
âI wonder. are you going to keep batting your lashes at Virgin- juice boy over here or are you going to keep downing shots until I convince you to let me fuck you somewhere private? Preferably the latter but without the convincing part.â Seokjinâs velvety voice mumbles shamelessly into your ear making you shudder.
âAs if thatâll ever happenâ you scoff , just as the bartender namjoon hands you the small glass making sure to flash you his dimpled smile one last time. You raise the liquid towards your mouth, downing it in one go. Already the calming sensation spreading up from your legs and throughout your body, making the annoying Ass next you a bit more bearable . Only when you finally notice the long and intimidating gaze he has set on you. You decide to go in for more â Another please.â
Seokjinâs nearly evil smirk never falters â If I do recall and I truly do. Pretty little y/n downed 5 of my birthday shots and let me lay between her legsâ he says way too loud for your liking. Your cheeks blushed and not from the fact that he just aired your sexual history in front of namjoon (who was handing you your next shot), but that the man had just called you pretty. Even more so that the simple compliment actually had you pressing your thighs together.
âI think we both can agree that years ago pretty little y/n made a huge mistakeâ
âYouâre right about thatâ he chuckles with a nod. In return you roll your eyes, reaching for the next shot in front of you and downing that one as well. You make eye contact with namjoon once again, his soft eyes connecting with the empty glass in your possession âjust one more pleaseâ you sheepishly smile and he bites his lip, silently laughing at your cuteness.
Once again a shot glass is slid your way. It was then that you noticed seokjin had moved significantly closer towards, the smell of his intoxicating cologne running up your nostrils and a large flat palm resting on the small of your back. When the hell did he put it there?
â g-good so we agree. Maybe now youâll finally leave me the hell aloneâ you attempt to ease away from him. The familiarity of the situation , bringing lost memories of how you once tried to resist the highly convincing man before.
âI never said that I agreed with what you said y/nâŠâ he says , voice becoming husky and soft. You hated to admit it, but it was pulling you in just like the sensual gaze he never failed to keep on you. You didnt know whether to blame it on the alcohol or that you just havnt had sex about 2 seasons of big bang theory ago.
âBu-but you just did-â
You were reaching for what was going to be your last shot , when seokjin comes in and snatches it from your grasp. You pout in return , not wanting to have to ask the dimpled boy for another. âI said you were right, only because you did make a mistake. You broke up with me when all I ever did was make you happy. Even worse, you did it right before we graduated and then you blocked me â the slight sadness in his voice would have had you wanting to console the man had it not been for the fact that he was the one who messed up.
âSeokjin, you cheated on me. Did you really think I was going to stay with you after finding that out?â you sputtered out.
He was midway through downing your shot, when your words had caused him to gasp and choke on the harsh drink. Immediately his cool is lost, the poor man doubling over to hack his lungs out before he oddly finishes it anyway. âI did not cheat on you. Where the hell did you get that stupid Idea?â he frowns rather disappointedly at you.
âOh please you're just saying that so Iâll let you slip your excited little hands up my dressâ you shake your head but a small part of you just can't get over the sincerity that was in his stare. A silent second passes by and seokjinâs trance is broken before he asks you âhow did you find out?â.
Your heart skips a beat. His soft voice riddled with no such guilt but he wanted to know how you discovered his unfaithfulness. In his eyes , he now seemed a bit curious more than concerned and it made an unsettling feeling appear in your stomach âI was told.â you swallowed âby some sorority girl - actually she was at your partyâ you then confessed.
âBlonde hair? Pouty lips.. And a permanent bitch face right?â he lists easily and the description matches the exact culprit who informed you of all his hidden lies. You guessed he mustâve gone off the way your eyes had wavered with uncertainty because seokjin had then let out an incredulous huff of disbelief. He hangs his head , his shoulders shaking from the small laugh that escapes his mouth ây/n. That was my exâ he says finally.
You gasped.
âYou let my ex-girlfriend get into your head. If there's one thing I remember about her, its that sheâs very manipulative, but also bitter and anyone with common sense knows thats not a good combinationâ he looks to you, only to see the disheartened look on your face. Your eyes full of guilty sadness now that you easily pieced two and two together.
âI-I dont know what to say-....Iâm sorry seokjinâ you managed out.
Sure you felt bad but your relationship was years ago. In-fact youâve barely thought about him since honestly. He smiles tenderly towards you, the warmth from his brown eyes seeping slowly through your guarded shield but only now , you almost don't mind to let it down a bit.
â Its fine, to be honest I should've known she would try something like that. You were probably too innocent for me anyways- I couldâve ruined youâ he jokes though you don't laugh, your mind staying stuck on the innocent part.
âRemember I'm the girl who stole your shots and took you back to her dormâ you say catching both him and yourself completely off guard. Your eyes then widen from the risky remark, heart hammering in your chest when seokjin quirks a teasing brow at you.
You then turn back towards the bar, the dimpled blonde smiling your way when you tap the empty space in front of you â a double would be greatâ you say but then for the first time seokjin acknowledges him as well. âTrust me. No it wouldn't.â he smiles a bit too sweet at the poor boy and you notice namjoonâs own smile falter from the slight animosity. Seokjin then grabs at your hand, his thumb slightly stroking the inside of you palm as the other finds its place again on your back. The intimate actions bringing your attention fully back to him when he speaks again.
âNow that the convincing part is done. Lets go somewhere a bit more privateâ
Honestly if you were shocked by the fact that youâve once again allowed seokjin slip under your skin...wellâŠthat would be perfectly okay. It didn't take a second thought for you to let seokjin lead you to what looked like tiny shed, the both of you slipping in easily unnoticed as everyone else focused on the beautiful couple dancing away into their new marriage.
You're bent over slightly, Seokjinâs hands coming towards your hips to pick them up and raise your ass towards him. Immediately he groans in his spot. the delicious sight of your pussy lips glistening with your arousal reminds him just why he was so fucking whipped for you back then. You were gorgeous...everywhere and his mouth was watering just to get a taste of you again.
A finger swipes gently at your exposed slit, sending a cold shiver down your back from the subtle friction.
âYou were always so sensitive for me weren't you baby?â He whispers, but by the way he confidently pushes the Long calloused finger into your unsuspecting hole, his own question is already answered.
â-J-jinâŠâ you grunt out the broken moan in appreciation. His finger is pulling away and pushing right back in , causing you squirm and whimper from the much needed pleasure. âI can't wait to fill you upâ a tiny squelch is heard as another finger is added to his torturing movements. His body coming forward onto your bare back and you could honestly melt just from the way it arched perfectly into him.
The tight knot in your stomach begins to loosen as you try your hardest hide your loud whimpers from any outsiders. Your legs trembling and you so badly want him to just fuck you already.
âP-pleaseâŠâ was all you could manage.
Seokjinâs fingers that were once pumping into you at a moderate pace turns to a more vicious route and you can't help but to squeal when the two lengthy digits forces your quivering pussy into its first orgasm in months. It leaves you breathless, weak and you were just about ready to collapse onto the neat shedâs floor.
â Tsk, You haven't gone soft on me have you?â Seokjin chuckles down at you, a wicked glint prominent in his midnight eyes and when you shake your head in return. you could only shiver as the smile drops and the tiny space goes cold with his next words
âIâm not done with you yet Pretty girlâŠâ
Next thing you knew you were being flipped onto your back and seokjinâs. strong hands had reached greedily for your underwear only to slide them completely off.
He then meets you on the ground, his body leaning back just a bit to unbuckle his black slacks. A noticeable swallow from your end driving the man a bit more mad with lust and he would swear he could cum right then and there just from that cute innocent gaze you were giving just when he pulls himself free.
âO-hâŠâ you could barely say, your mouth completely dry. Your watched anxiously, a bead of precum already oozing out through the thick red Mushroom head of what you could definitely remember was his above average cock. The hard veiny muscle not having any shame to rub said cum swiftly down your exposed slit.
âYouâre so fucking pretty baby, did you know long Iâve held this for you?â He growls out, deep carnal lust stuck in his voice as he inches closer above you. You weren't given the chance to answer him because as soon as you could , his fingers had wrapped within your once neat bun to pull your head back even further.
You could only then let out what sounded like a breathy moan. Your lungs almost giving up on you when you feel the head of his cock prying itâs way into you. His mouth laying open mouth kisses onto your exposed neck ,making his way up to towards your chin and finally landing on your mouth.
As much as you wanted to resist his kiss, the way Seokjinâs tongue had begun to dip swirl onto yours had your toes curling just from the passion of it and your entire body melting in pure bliss.
Your legs are spread out a bit wider for him, his hands latching onto the back of your knees to do so. âSo cute. So good for meâ he whispers out his praises into your ear, his hips jerking forward to shove his member deep into you and you nearly scream from the intrusion. Instantly you feel full, your body humming with pleasure as seokjin finds his paced rhythm. His hips slamming down onto yours with such a force that it has your eyes rolling to the back of your head.
â so good! Yes just like that!â You exclaim out to him when the change of his angle only ends with your g-spot getting rammed into over and over.
âLook at pretty y/n. taking Daddyâs big cock like a good girlâ he says, each sweet thrust matching his words. It was at this point where seokjinâs hand had ended up slipping from under one of your knees only to drop one of your legs. During the slight mishap seokjin was mid-thrust into you when you yelped and jerked your hips from the even more intense pleasure.
âOh? Did that feel good baby? Maybe I should make you feel like that some more hmm?â He chuckles when you shake your head. Ignoring your response to switch you on your right side and sit himself on top of your right thigh, your left thigh being pushed against you as he proceeds with his wreckening.
What once was a difficult task had become impossible to withhold your loud moans. The new position allowing him to fuck further into your walls, burying himself to the hilt and maybe even deeper than he probably should be. It has your body jumping, your hands instantly bracing themselves on his highly active hips as tears started to leak from your eyes.
âSo fucking cute. Pretty y/n don't ever run from me again - let daddy take care of you.â He pleads and praises you in your ear as he leans forward. âO-Ok-kay!â You unthinkingly gasped trying to catch your lost breath, his surged strokes turning your mind to mush and you could feel your orgasm climbing terrifyingly fast.
âAngh! Jin! Im go-ing to c-cum!â
You didn't have to tell him for him to know. Seokjin could feel his balls tightening with every brutal squeeze of your core- it was like you were trying to milk the manâs dick. He chuckled from the thought, his harsh grunts being masked by an unbelievably deep sexy laugh âthats right baby, milk me. Make me cum S-so I can fill that pretty pussy of yours.â
As if on cue your body gives out. Sweet burning pleasure pushing up throughout your entire body while you thrashed uncontrollably under Seokjinâs relentless thrusts.
âMmmm!â You screamed, but your mouth is immediately muffled under one of his hands. The grip of it suddenly becoming unbearably tight once seokjin finds his own release in you.
You hold your breath, his body collapsing next to you once he slips out with a satisfied sigh.
âThat was....even better than beforeâ
#bangtanarmynet#ksmutclub#thekimlinenet#kim seokjin#bts#bts one shot#bts smut#bts jin#bts imagines#bts memes#bts ot7#bangtan#bts au#bts scenerio#bts smut dirty#bts fic#bts fanfic#my fic
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hey, i really liked your posts about ep12, it helped me a lot to put things into perspective. i was wondering if you could share your thoughts on the 2gether finale as well, coz right now i just wanna cry im so disappointed with it =(
Aww, thank you, anon. <3
Ok so my thoughts on the finale are kind of all over the place but Iâll try to explain as best as I can and hopefully itâs gonna make sense.
Like I said, in my original post I dont love the ep but I dont hate it either. I suppose I fall somewhere in the middle. I enjoyed a lot of it - seeing all the couples progress and be happy together, Man/Type especially were just so adorable, Mil and Phukong starting to build something with each other (lil bro using Sarawatâs pick up line was a really nice touch, love that), Mil being an all around awesome supportive friend to BOTH Tine and Wat?? We love to see it. The way he turned up at the football field where Wat was being his angsty self and literally kicked his butt into taking action - *chefâs kiss*
Him and Fong are now the parents of the baby gays I dont make the rules.
Watâs confession on stage and his song that he literally named after Tine and when he said he never confessed to Pam because he didnt know what love was before he met Tine - perfection. Absolute perfection. Iâm here for it.
And Tineâs heartbreak was so well done too, I just felt so much for him.
Again, as I said, the whole thing with Pam didnt turned out exactly as I had hoped but it wasnt the worst case scenario either so Iâll take it. Iâd rather have Pam making a mistake and realising it and backing off while assuring Tine that Wat really does love HIM and even though she tried Pam didnt stand a chance because itâs always gonna be Tine for Sarawat and she understands that now over her being an actual bitch who keeps trying to seperate them and uses the situation to her advantage. I mean they could have gone that way too - Pam didnt have to give Tine that recording or to tell him how Wat changed after meeting him but she did, I think, as her own way of apologizing for what sheâd done. So yeah, overall, Iâm fine with this.
ALSO NOBODY DIED SO THATâS A BIG PLUS.
(History 3 MODC canât relate)
ANYWAY, so those are the positives for me. Which as it turns out is most of the episode yay! Now onto what wasnt quite so positive.
My main issue with this episode is the resolution to Wat and Tineâs conflict. Mainly, there really... wasnt one. And Iâm not talking about the physical intimacy thing, Iâll touch on that later but more importantly for the ending - the emotional intimacy. None of the problems they had were properly addressed. Tineâs insecurities were rooted so deeply that despite Wat spending 12 EPISODES doing anything and everything to show his love and adoration, Tine still couldnt really believe it. And thatâs not gonna be resolved with a simple recording.
And on the other hand, can you image how all of this would make Sarawat feel? Like no matter what he does, no matter how much of himself he gives to Tine, his boyfriend still would find it easier to believe that Wat is just using him as a replacement for someone else. Thatâs gonna fuck with his head even if Tine came back. I really really wished they had talked at least a little about these things.
Like maybe if we didnt have half of the episode filled with pointless flashbacks there could have been time to actually talk... (tbh, part of me kind of wonders if they purposefully put in so many flashbacks to fill in the air time so they wouldnt HAVE to write those scenes which leaves me ?????).
I think I mentioned this too in the other post, but the Wat/Tine reunion echoes beat for beat the Fighter/Tutor reunion with all its issues but while WhyRU has a reason for why things turned out like that, here I just... I dont know what could have been the reason for 2getherâs writers? Unless they also couldnt film everything they wanted...
And then thereâs the... âhigh-five controversyâ, letâs call it and again I find myself in the middle of the argument. I stand by what Iâve said before about how I feel about the way they handled physical intimacy between the characters - yes, objectively and critically speaking, Iâm not here for writers/directors/channel/whoever trying to censor the physical intimacy of an established couple. There is nothing wrong with two partners wanting to kiss/cuddle/have sex/etc. Sex isnt something dirty (I mean it can be depending on what youâre writing BUT THATâS A DIFFERENT GENRE OK, we are not talking about smutty fic here cough cough) and shameful that âpureâ people shouldnt be enjoying (lovely post on the topic here I was just thinking about it last night). And itâs about time show creators got with the programme, ESPECIALLY when it comes to non-straight couples.
As of ep13 itâs clear to me that 2gether went through some serious censorship - lots of people have talked about how itâs a thing that they do on this particular channel and maybe thatâs all it is, I dont know. I dont want to speculate whatâs been going on behind the scenes since I dont have any idea and sadly I dont think the writers will ever be willing to talk about it. Iâd LOVE to hear their throughts on this matter tbh and why they decided to do things this way.
So on an objective level, this is bullshit. Subjectively, and this is where my personal opinion comes in, I wasnt as bothered by this as I normally would be because Iâve been enjoying all the other aspects of the relationship that the show successfully built up and prtrayed on screen. Does that make sense?
Specifically about the finale, though, I agree with the complains. Part of why the reunion felt so underwhelming and disappointing, I think, was not only the lack of emotional intimacy but also the hella.... awkward? physical âintimacyâ they showed? The scene absolutely did call for a kiss or a hug, at the very least. Instead they were standing 2 feet apart cause... theyâre not gay? I really really do not understand what happened there in that scene. Iâve seen some people mention that the finale was filmed before the other episodes so the actors werent used to each other yet and honestly I can see it - watching Tine and Wat in that ending montage felt like I was watching them at the beginning of their fake dating when both were awkward and unsure of where they stood with each other rather than seeing an established in love couple coming back together after going through something tough.
So these are my thoughts on the finale. It wasnt the best one Iâve ever seen but not bad enough to ruin the rest of the show for me (and thereâs NOTHING I hate more than bad endings ruining a story Iâve fallen in love with so thereâs that) and I do really love this show and its characters so much. Itâs hard, even impossivle to find a perfect show from start to finish and honestly Iâve come to believe thatâs not as important as what you get out of it - if the show makes you happy, despite whatever writing issues it might have, thatâs the most important thing, I think. And 2gether did that for me. So Iâm glad I watched it.
Omg, this got so long. Again. If youâre still with me, anon, youâre a hero. I hope I was able to help you. <3
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Blackpink: The Album Review
Okay, this is the first time iâve done this and the truth is i donât know how, so iâll just try my best.
First of all: I am a Jennie biased blink. That means I have no trustworthy sense of criticism when it comes to them and if you do, this is probably not the place for you. I will try to talk about this album with a sense of criticism, but sometimes, iâm just gonna like a song because itâs blackpink and yâall just gotta deal with it.
BUT, I am not afraid of saying i donât like things that the pinks have said it to like, which is actually how iâm starting this review. So, if you guys are all about loving the girls and emotion and âthink about how they must feelâ this is a decision made by the girls, this place is also not for you either. I am a blink and i share a lot of love for those four women, but i am also a consumer of their work as artists. I will complain if I didnât get something I thought was necessary as a viewer and listener for my money and attention to be spent. I will not, of course, hate on them in any way.
Ok, before anything:
1) English isnât my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes. 2) Here, weâre gonna talk about the cover, pre-release single choices, writing credits, tracklist and my honest opinion about the album as a whole.
a) The Cover:
Thereâs not a lot to talk about but the fact that itâs gorgeous, but simple. I didnât understand why a crown if the name was The Album (something unoriginal to be honest, but iâm not 100% against it) and thereâs no reference to royalty throughtout the album besides maybe Jennieâs rap âdidnât want to be a princessâ. I did find the cover visually pleasing tho, could be much more embarrasing.
b) Writing credits and Track List:
This one is quick. Iâm extremely glad Jennie and Jisoo were credited as songwriters (Jennie as well as a composer) but Teddy gotta give Danny Chung to god. He hates rapper Jennie and heâs the reason Lisa doesnât write. Heâs always in charge of the raps so teddy gets confortable and Lisa doesnât get a chance to write her own verses, which is something the sure thing cover showed us she can do. Also, he hates rapper Jennie to the point where she had to write her rap on the title track (wich is good, but, you know what i mean) and wasnt even given a chance to write more than 8 seconds. Melanie I hope this is the last time you were here. Loren you can stay. Tommy and Ryan yall were cute we had fun but itâs over letâs move one (seriously, these producers really made me appreciate Teddy more lmao pls sir never leave us). Okay thatâs it. Now, to the track list.
I will be talking about the fact this shouldnât even be called a full album on the My Honest Opinion About The Album As A Whole topic.
1. How You Like That
I say my opinion more detailed on the next topic but at at essence. Cute. A good opener to the album and what is to come, but too much of a bside to even be a pre release single.
6.5/10
2. Ice Cream
Again, my opinion itâs on the next topic. Cute song. Loved Chaennieâs high notes and wish i didnât know english so the rap didnt sound that silly. Not as bad as blinks and non blinks make it out to be.Â
6.12/10
3. Pretty Savage
I kinda also talked about that in the next topic lmao. It has everything a blackpink song should have. Thereâs been some controversy about Lisa âborn skinny bitchâ but Lisa was talking about herself since she has been body shamed through her whole career. She was right and she should say it. Youâre entitled to feel uncomfortable but thatâs just the thing she wasnât talking about me or you. She was taking her pain and wearing like an armor. This was a diss track for the haters. Taking that away from her because of our own issues itâs kinda mistreating hers.
8.82/10
4. Bet You Wanna
Yes you guessed it right I talk more about it next topic. Itâs a bop. Loved Jennie here. She has such a versatile voice I was very proud to hear her. And Cardi was also good. Just hope Lisa will get her rap part live cause she didnât have much lines here. But I loved Jenlisaâs brigde. RosĂ©âs adlibs peak perfection and Jisooâs chorus and english thatâs what iâm talking about. The chorus can be a little repetitive and it kinda ends a bit suddenly but it doesnt bother me much.
8.37/10
5. Lovesick Girls
WHAT TO SAY ABOUT THIS MASTERPIECE OTHER THAN BEST BLACKPINK TITLE TRACK? Love that for me. It was so different than anything theyâve done so far, the lyrics were AMAZING, the message behind it also, the visuals in the MV, storylinne, RAPPER JENNIE OMG, she got the most memorable line âdidnât want to be a princess, iâm pricelessâ i love her tf the shade to the yg princess title and her scene in the car and in the mental hospital(will not touch on the controversies cause that was annoying) also Lisaâs rap/singing with a flow in the begining her voice OMG I WAS SHOOKEDT. Jisooâs high note in the brigde? RosĂ©?? perfect.
10/10
6. Crazy Over You
Rapper Jennie for the last time with a 8 second rap again but LETâS BE POSITIVE. A bop. I loved the i. went. crazy. over. you. I love the lyrics. It bother a bit this much english but itâs bpâs idendity so iâm fine with it.
8.5/10
7. Love To Hate Me
This was a predictable song in the best possible way. Easily one of their best songs. Thereâs honestly nothing left to say. Also. Lisaâs rap. Maybe Danny Chung deserves some points. It even felt like she was a feat in the song like her flow yall just perfection.
9.4/10
8. You Never Know.
Great song I left with depression.
I like how this album talks with haters and blinks, it really shows a different side from the pinks. Only a few know the emotion Jennie starting off âbut you never know unless you walk in my shoes [...] cause everybody sees what they wanna see, itâs easier to jugde it than to believeâ. It was written by Loren, a close friend from the girls and the boy whoâs Jenlichaeng boyfriend in the LSGâs MV and Bekuh Boom, a producer whoâs been with them for really long, but if anyone got a conspirancy theory that they were involved in the songwriting process of the song, sign me up. You donât need proves. I believe you. ALSO JISOO GOT MOST LINE ON THIS ONE and we got singer Lisa. After a while, it become my favorite song from the album. Now, itâs my favorite song from their discography. Debate your mother.
9.62/10
c) Pre-Release single Choices:Â
I canât stress about this enough. Whoever was in charge for the single choices needs to go to jail. Not that HYLT is bad (at all) but comparing to the rest of the songs, it look MUCH more like a powerful bside than Love To Hate Me and Pretty Savage ever will. I will lecture later how Pretty Savage was the perfect choice to first release single, just wait. Now, to the controversial Ice Cream. To be honest, i found the song super cute and i think the MV was one of their best. It was different and refreshing, love that for me. But the whole sequence of events that turned out to that disasterous twitter timeline, with constant attacks to the girls especially Lisa over things they cannot control such as line distribuition and a sabotage from antis on yt comment section, was something I kinda already saw it coming. Ice Cream is Blackpinkâs most successful single to date, but it was a bad choice from the start (I will talk about that in a second). For starters, YG decided not to promote the song well. While announcing the single, they gave us a poster with pictures from a summer package released months before. And each week they kept doing that, only using actual teaser photos in the release week. The hype was pretty much out. I canât say my timeline is 100% blink because i have way too many fandoms that iâve been following for longer than iâve known kpop, but compared to the HYLT hype, they were pretty down and thatâs on YGE. Also, ever since coachella, itâs been antecipated by fans and artists the possibility of a Blackpink x Ariana Grande (one of the most popular singes these last couple of years). The idea of an Aripink collab got blinks (who were already with an eye wide open after Blackpink was seen with Tommy Brown, Ariâs basically oficial producer, who has been producing for her ever since her second album and was reponsible for many hits of her latest project, Thank U, Next, such as 7 rings and Thank U, Next) even more hyped when YG announced (one of those old photoshoot posters. Iâm sorry I will never let that go that company is so trash) that Blackpinkâs second release was going to be a collaboration with a western artist, and Ariana herself like Jennieâs instagram post about the next single. I cannot put in words the reaction of my twitter timeline when YG confirmed that the collab was actually with Selena Gomez.Â
Now, on a more personal note.Â
You see, I actually like Selena. I like her songs, besides the critics. Perfect is pop perfection. Waverly Place is the best disney show ever since Thatâs So Raven. But, to a collab made to the US market, and besides the success of Rare, Selena isnât a sales force like Adele or Taylor Swift, nor a streaming force like Ariana Grande. Nothing takes my theory that this was supposed to be an aripink collab but, for some reason, she dipped and then interscope (blackpink us label and selenaâs label) picked her. Selena showed us a good time and promoted the girls more than YGE did but, it wasnât a surprise when the song didnât get a top 10 (a top 13 is really good tho, donât get me wrong).Â
Now back to the story telling
Selena was more than a feat, she sang the whole damn song, getting more vocal lines the the entire vocal line. Sheâs only a few seconds behind Lisa, who got the most lines in general. I understand that it is a collab, but this is the girlsâ single. Why would they want to listen to them for only 16 seconds, the amount of time RosĂ© got? That set a bunch of solo stans (something that exists more in this fandom than everywhere else) to boycoitt the release, a huge fansite even taking out their funds for the full album (that was low, even for a solo account. JisooBar, you aint seeing heaven). Did i think it was a little of overeacting? As someone whoâs an army that had to handle Not Todayâs line distribuition, and especially since weâre talking about the main vocalist, someone who will for sure have more lines in the future (as she did), kinda. But, like i said, it was a bomb getting ready to explode at any minute. If it wasnât that itâd be something else. That being said, NOTHING will ever justify the nastyness yâall did with Lisa and even Jennieâs comment section. Nothing. That was ridiculous even for solo stans. BUT for people who got worried about Lisaâs lack of posts after the release, donât worry. She didnât post a lot because Thailand is going through some stuff and I donât think she has YGeâs permission to talk about it (when I catch the ones in power on that company istg).Â
Wow, that was long. At essence, it was a bad choice for several reasons, but i enjoyed the song a lot. Canât wait for the live performances with chaesooâs lines.
Now, back to HYLT. It was greatly promoted, it stopped Zicoâs (huge in korea) releases and a bunch of other big artists in South Korea. Got 7 Perfect All-Kills and wouldâve gotten more than 12 if the charts werenât reforming at the time. It also broke a lot of records, and repeated Sour Candyâs position on the bb100 on #33. Itâs another very Blackpink song that I enjoyed but kinda aged. Many non blinks didnât like it but itâs not like they were ever going to admit they liked a bp song. Theyâre annoying. The songâs biggest problem is probably the 2015 edm in the chorus. Like. Teddy. You gotta let that go. Itâs time. He kinda heard us in the album. But, these kinds of songs are very liked by the general public, especially the korean one. An interview was made asking the general public if blackpink should change concepts and they said a bit fat no. So that tells what you need to know. And that it why i think Pretty Savage should have been the first pre release single.Â
Okay, let me tell you another series of event. Back on november 2019, when we were starving because YGe does not like money, BlackpinkBar, a big fansite, payed trucks to be sent to YG building during a whole day demanding for better treatment to Blackpink. You can find all the demands online, but at essence, when it came to music related, blinks always mention: Jisooâs lines, screen time and blackpink in your area, Main Rapper Jennie, Lisa dance break, RosĂ©âs high note. On HYLT, we got nothing. And everyone had to shrug it off saying it was just a pre release single, BUT it would be better hyped by blink and the hype to the second pre release wouldâve lasted longe if PRETTY SAVAGE, who has basically all of that, was the pre release single. It wouldâve assured us of so much. Jisoo said bp in your area twice, she RAPPED, she was singing, she couldâve had more screetime and center time especially bc sheâs on all chorus. Jennie Main Rapper would go back and we wouldnât have to be blue balled (which caused the ice cream meltdown)every single release and only having to wait till the title track and only to have a 8 SECOND RAP. I wonât talk about that now. Moving on. RosĂ© wouldnât get a high note, but she wouldâve gotten the brigde all to herself and the next pre release single, bet you wanna (wait for it), she would get those incredible adlibs. And Lisaâs dance break. Not only this is bpâs most danceable song and has a bunch of lisaâs raps, it also has jennieâs outro, where for a least 20 seconds lisa couldâve thrived. Yall we were robbed.
Now, real quick, back to Ice Cream. In a perfect world (or just a world where YGâs current ceo) had brains, if they wanted a collaboration to show the pink side of blackpink, with a poppy song and sassy lyrics, the artist not to be in the whole song, and to have an artist who would driven attention from the locals and is a big streaming force, THEY WOULDâVE CHOSEN BET YOU WANNA. My biggest problem with bet you wanna is Lisaâs lack of lines, which could cause stuff and well we just miss her they could have added a rap even for 8 seconds, BUT, seeing her all around pretty savage and knowing sheâs gonna have Cardiâs rap during live performances would cool things down. Since we were in the middle of a pandemic, instead of a mv like ice cream where they had to do it separately, they couldâve done something like IUâs eight. A huge part in animation and a few with people. Literally YG why are you so dumb. Bye.
d)Â My Honest Opinion About The Album As A Whole:
I did some math (lol) and my rank for The Album is 8.4. Itâs easily one of the best releases from this year and I loved it so much, but something were left to be desired and i think i could pass everything and just turn a blind eye at things, except one: the fact we waited for 4 years, watched all ggs and yg groups getting comebacks last semester and only got 8 songs. Loona is releasing a mini album with that amount of songs. Stray Kids and BTSâs mini albums are longer than that. It was bad enough KTL had 4 songs and a remix (a joke) with 2 songs lacking raps and no rapper jennie only for them to carry YGâs dirty name after what their protected boys did. I legit hate it here they didnât even had 30 minutes, their longest song wasnât even 4 minutes. Also, before anyone says anything about the girlâs interview about quality over quantity. Iâd like to say that i understand them having that when it comes to have one comeback a year and iâm honestly okay with that. But their first full album? 8 songs? Are you kidding me? Like I said, Iâm a consumer. I refuse to receive this half assed excuse about quality over quantity when they had more than enough time to produce and write more than 8 quality songs? what, is impossible to write more than one song per moth? these songs have formulas, they can be made more than 8 times. A blackpink album its more than a thousand reals here. That 90% of a sallary. And please donât come with the âif you donât want it just donât buy itâ âyou can just unstan themâ bc thatâs not the case. I love their songs. I love the girls. But Iâm a consumer of their art and if they want to be takend seriously as artists, they gotta do more than 8 songs on a full album. Itâs unfair to anyone that isnât a diehard fan willing to sell out an overpriced photobook in hours. Thatâs not the only kind of fan blackpink needs. they need the store locals, the people who are not on twitter or tumblr or instagram. Cause those locals are gonna stay like they stayed with adele and taylor swift. stan twitter is much more likely to leave them with time.
Side note: Iâm tired of commenting on rapper Jennie so Iâll just say Jennie deserves better than 8 second raps as the main rapper of the group. That doesnt mean I want Lisa to not rap or to Jisoo not to sing, as many will say bc apparently thatâs what people hear when we say main rapper who trained for 6 years to be a main rapper should rap on at least most title tracks even if not on all songs.
But yeah, thatâs it. Besides the unfortunate final note, I loved The Album and now Blackpink itâs my second most listened artist of all time. They were top 13 before the album.
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