#there should be shes one of my favorite characters

[thepersephonecabin]

Some of my favorites as well:

Mystère à la Tour Eiffel (2015)

Wlw murder mystery romance with happy ending.

Victorian interracial lesbians (main character is white with a black love interest)

Been a while since I lost it but if I remember it correctly there was little emphasis put on period-typical homophobia and racism so it was a very chill watching experience

In french but subtitles are available

WERE THE WORLD MINE

Basically the main character is playing Puck in a high school production of A Midsummer Night's Dream and finds a way to make the flower that makes everyone fall in love w/each other. He lives in a super homophobic town and decides to make everyone gay temporarily so that they realize love is love.

Begins with you thinking its dubious consent when the main character makes his crush fall in love with him but then when the spell is removed is basically like "oh no babe i was already in love with you i just hadn't said anything yet"

Suuuuuuuuper low budget

Banger songs

SHELTER

Happy ending m/m romance about a guy who is for all intents and purposes an adoptive dad to his lil nephew because his sister doesn't take care of him

Very very cute dad feelings

YOU SHOULD MEET MY SON

Ok this is one of the most ridiculous movies I've ever seen in my whole life but its so funny expect everything to be extremely extremely camp

Premise is this southern lady and her sister find out that her son is gay and just had a break up and at first they freak out because they're southern Christians but then they decide to go to a gay club and find him a bf

I want these little old ladies to adopt me. Hearing them affirm all of my self-doubts as a queer person from the south cured my depression

Supporting characters include the love interest who is a male stripper, local leather daddy husbands, repressed lesbian, like 3? drag queens one of which is black and another is latino

BOY MEETS GIRL

Romance between cishet man and his childhood best friend who is a trans woman friends to lovers fans rise

I cried at this movie!!!

Spoilers- when they get together at the end, she's skinny dipping and hes professing his love and how beautiful she is. She walks out of the water revealing her pre-op body and says "am i still pretty?" and hes like you're gorgeous and she kind of gets self-consciousness bc of her penis and is like "we can ignore it if you want" and he says "i never want to ignore any part of you again" and kisses her and BOY I LOST IT IM SO SOFT

[plaidcowboy]

kansas anymore ( the longest goodbye ) — role model

( notes ) eeee omg i’ve been wanting to do album themed bot release for so long! this is literally my favorite album these past months, i love tucker down. i did a lot of characters that ive never done before trying to spice things up. i’d love to have feedback on this. thank u all sm for the support. i love u!

track one — ( writings on the wall )

୨🌪️៹ donnie darko — ‘dads on the phone and he’s lecturing me, ‘bout a girl that he met back when he was nineteen.’ donnie, his father and his bestfriend all having a realistic conversation about his toxic girlfriend.

track two — ( look at that woman )

୨🌪️៹ patrick bateman — ‘damn honey, look at you go. look at that woman, breaking my heart.’ watching his ex from a distance at a business party, still so deeply in love with her.

track three — ( scum bag )

୨🌪️៹ jonathan byers — ‘i’m a scumbag, i’m a setback, im a stain on the kitchen floor. but you stand by me.’ getting high sometimes means all your thoughts coming to light, especially jonathans thoughts of insecurity.

track four — ( oh, gemini )

୨🌪️៹ spencer reid — ‘i’ll remember your face from time to time, i’ll remember that taste of cheap red wine, i’ll remember those days i called you mine.’ visiting the bar where you had your first date, spencer runs into his ex, both of you here for the same reason.

track five — ( frances )

୨🌪️៹ benedict bridgerton — ‘at the end of the day, i’m just happy i could say she was mine.’ after your parting due to status issues, benedict releases a poem book, every word being publicly read all about you.

track six — ( superglue )

୨🌪️៹ rafe cameron — ‘we’re gonna make it through. a little bit of superglue, stick by my side.’ gentle apologies and reassurance as rafe finally notices the crumbling of your relationship, wanting to make things right.

track seven — ( the dinner )

୨🌪️៹ felix catton — ‘swear they wouldn’t even notice if i never even showed, take me home.’ going to your boyfriends house for dinner to meet his parents for the first time reveals the difference in your status, felix in a cold rich family and you in the exact opposite.

track eight — ( deeply still in love )

୨🌪️៹ patrick zweig — ‘i’m sorry but i’m deeply still in love, in love with you now. yes ma’am.’ pathetic man crashing your wedding, getting down on his hands and knees to beg for your love back!

track nine — ( slut era interlude )

୨🌪️៹ bruce wayne — ‘i don’t like you, but i’d like you to spend the night. i’m going through it girl, could you do it girl?’ pulling himself out of bed to go to the club, trying to recover from his heartbreak as he brings home a random hookup.

track ten — ( so far gone )

୨🌪️៹ michael berzatto — ‘if you wanted me to go, you should have told me. so far gone, so lonely.’ mikey picking you up shitfaced drunk from a club, beer being your self remedy to a heartbreak. crying in mikey’s car.

track eleven — ( slipfast )

୨🌪️៹ jj maybank — ‘oh my god what i’d pay to just, run away from this. let me pay for it later.’ leaving behind your responsibilities and honestly bad-for-you boyfriend to spend the day with your bestfriend. slipping away from your duties to live in the moment.

track twelve — ( compromise )

୨🌪️៹ hughie campbell — ‘you deserve a happy ever after don’t you? after all the tears you’ve cried, don’t you compromise.’ not wanting you to settle for anything less than what you deserve, hughie changes himself for you.

track thirteen — ( something, somehow, someday )

୨🌪️៹ will graham — ‘he’s a loose cannon, foolish man who needs some medication. she’s a shoe-tied, bluesky honeymoon vacation. but i believe they’re meant to be.’ crying in your lap about what he feared the most being brought to life, not being good enough for you.

track fourteen — ( old recliners )

୨🌪️៹ natalie scatorccio — ‘i remember when the days were long, old recliners in the yard. kicking heels up to her favorite song, all the boys were playing cards.’ living with your ex after her return from the wilderness, battling with your own romantic emotions.

track fifteen — ( sally, when the wine runs out )

୨🌪️៹ anakin skywalker — ‘i’ll buy a couple of rounds. don’t let me think i’m enough, then disappear when the wine runs out.’ taking a break from the brutal jedi training to have a drink. spotting a cute, possible hookup.

track sixteen — ( some protector )

୨🌪️៹ sam winchester — ‘am i still worried about you? why, yes i am and i always will be some protector.’ sam watching you from a distance, the alcohol bringing him straight to your house in the late hours of the night.

[angeliteeyes]

Danganronpa Girlies x Reader - What if you were their favorite gacha game character? Feat. Sayaka, Kyoko, Chiaki, Mikan, and Tsumugi

A modern au in which the dr girlies are just as chronically online and cringe as we are

cw: ...... gestures at tsumugi. be warned, she's acting like herself (immoral, inconsiderate of human life, and should be in jail)

Dedicated to @wandiethewanderer and @cmiru for both being angels and sweethearts on my last post with this au T~T

-Sayaka-

Sayaka's situation with you is unique, to say the least. If you don't know about the Love Live franchise and how each of the fictional idols has their seiyuu (voice actor) actually perform as them and be super involved and all that, well now you do. This au is essentially exactly like that with Sayaka as a seiyuu, but with two possibilities depending on your gender.

If you're the same gender as her, she knew from the moment your seiyuu auditions were posted that she HAD to voice you. You were just... perfect for her, y'know? It's strange to say, but when she saw you, it suddenly clicked in her mind what having a soulmate feels like.

The problem is, she wasn't given the role. Those bastards for some stupid reason decided to cast her as some other chick??? Instantly, she becomes her own character's number one hater. They're nowhere near as cute as you are! And if there's ever any drama between her character and you in the story, oh boy. Prepare to find her on an anonymous post ranting about how you deserved better, how that bitch was so, so mean to you. Just trashing her to no end.

But no matter how much she hates her character, it's nothing compared to the burning rage and loathing she feels towards your seiyuu. How dare they steal you away from her? God, she'd totally get rid of her by trashing her social image if she could. When you're an idol, all it takes is one unflattering image to get leaked, one photo of you on a date with a mystery man... It would be so stupidly easy. But then you would get haters too, and she'd never hurt you. And so, poor Sayaka has to just grit her teeth and silently seethe while acting like nothing's wrong.

If you're not the same gender, on the other hand, she actually ends up quite happy in whatever role they give her. To be honest, she doesn't exactly care for it all that much, but the boost it gives to her career? Priceless.

But then the producers come up with this idea to release a new idol group that's... not girls? In this economy? Needless to say, she's adamantly against it. After all, the fanbase likes them for being female idols. If they diverge from that, the franchise's popularity will tank (and hers, of course, but she doesn't say that out loud). Still, they carry on with the idea, which is where you come in.

She wants to hate you so so bad. It's your fault that her followers went down 10% overnight and her dms are flooded with pissed-off fans lashing out. It's only fair, right? So why is her hand hovering over the 10 pull button? Why is your adorable face lighting up her screen after she spent a disgusting amount of money on you?

Sayaka still resents the other characters in your group, but you... Well, she can handle being a little less popular if it's for your sake.

-Kyoko-

When people at her school think of Kyoko, they imagine her cool, collected exterior. They think of her high grades and the way she calmly handles any situation thrown at her.

What they don't imagine is her staying up till midnight, staring at her computer screen and meticulously spinning around a 3d model of you—and definitely not the various, uh, angles she stops at. The thing is, it's not even sexual or anything on her part. She just genuinely is so interested in knowing every little detail about you that she fails to recognize how easily misinterpreted her actions could be.

There isn't a single piece of dialogue of yours that she doesn't have both written down and analyzed thoroughly. In this au, she actually gives up entirely on the whole detective shtick in pursuit of programming, all so she can get that juicy insider info. Not that anybody but her is privy to this information. To outsiders, she just looks like the same old genius Kirigiri.

Another thing about her is her insane dedication to rituals surrounding you. She will NEVER miss her dailies, new cards/skins for you, your birthday, etc. Girlie could be in a hospital and still manages to log in. The very definition of loyalty.

-Chiaki-

Ah, Chiaki. Even in a modern au, she's still a total nerd.

When news came out about a new game release, naturally, she pre-registered immediately. No matter what genre your game is, it captured her interest all the same. She's just a pro gamer like that.

To be honest, the game you're in isn't exactly... the best. It's awful, to be frank. Every screen takes way too long to load, it crashes at least once per gaming session, and the actual gameplay mechanics just suck. Yet, somehow, she keeps playing, all because of your voice cheering her on over and over. She kinda Stockholms herself into loving the game. Sure, it's lagging... but that just means she has more time to stare at you and admire your art. So what if resources are too scarce and you have to grind for eternity? That's more time with you, gosh dang it!!!

Chiaki, being her sleepy self, is part of the body-pillow squad—or at least, she would be if your game was good enough to warrant such merchandise being sold. There are people that take commissions for those sorts of things, but for some reason ordering one of you never works out for her? Whether it's shipping issues or some other random thing, it's like fate is working against her. Poor girl has to just tape a photo of you onto a pillow and call it a day.

-Mikan-

You know how a lot of people turn to fiction as a way of coping with real-life trauma? Yeah, that description fits Mikan perfectly. The public school system and its inhabitants aren't exactly kind to her, and neither is her home life. For so long, she simply accepted being treated like garbage because, well, nobody taught her not to. Until you came along.

You are something so terribly precious to her, being the only person who speaks to her kindly, as well as the only part of her life she actually has control over. She needs you. Mikan likes to think you need her too. After all, your game has quite a lot of parasocial mechanics. You tell her good morning every day, confide in her about your troubles, and even have an affection meter (which is always maxed out on her account). Don't you get sad and lonely if she doesn't log in? Don't you look forward to talking to her, just like she does for you? Please say you rely on her. Give her a reason to keep going.

Mikan's one of the heavy daydreamer types. She kind of has to, with how horrific her real life is. It's the only way she can survive. Out of all of her fantasies, though—of which there are several—her absolute favorites are ones where you're sick. Admittedly, they can get a little... much, with how poor your health is in them. The more ill you are, the more you'll depend on her. The more valuable she is. Don't worry, though. In all of her fantasies, one thing remains the same; you're fully taken care of and cherished so incredibly deeply.

-Tsumugi-

I'm gonna be real. If you know Tsumugi, then whatever you're imagining this version of her is like, you're probably exactly right. Yes, she's absolutely insane about her obsession with you. Yes, she's handmade countless cosplays of you, one for every single outfit you've worn. And yes, she makes incredibly obscure references to you/your game every two seconds. But that's the surface-level stuff. So let's dig a little deeper into this one and explore the less-obvious.

It's easy to imagine her treating you the way she canonically does her standard favorite fictional characters throughout V3, but... if she's this in love with you, her passion is far from even her definition of normal. This is a passion that matches how her canon counterpart feels towards Danganronpa. And just like the canon, it's going to take her to a dark, dark place.

She latches onto you like a damn leech, making her entire personality revolve around being your number one fan. It's like her entire life before you got wiped out of existence. Nothing in the world matters more than you do. And yet it keeps turning. Her parents' expectations keep weighing Tsumugi down, demanding time and energy she isn't willing to give to anyone else but you. They're always nagging her about doing the chores, doing her homework, going to school every day. Always something she's supposed to do and something she's doing wrong.

So, she fixes the problem. One night, she packs up her belongings with the prepared excuse of a mandatory school trip. When the police call her phone on the way there and mention a house fire, Tsumugi does a damn good job at playing the sweet, innocent girl who's learning for the first time that her family suffered an unfortunate "accident". She has to, cause if they ever found out the truth, how could she keep up with your game's updates?

I wish I could say she feels even the tiniest bit of remorse for her actions, but she doesn't. She just doesn't. If anything, she feels relieved that her parents are finally out of the picture. Everyone treats her so gently now, so carefully, no longer daring to judge her or tell her what to do. Even her teachers back off and don't point out when she's on her phone mid-class, doing her dailies for you.

Eventually, this dream life she's living will inevitably shatter and fall apart. Maybe the police investigation reveals the truth behind that cursed fire, or maybe her facade simply breaks on its own. But for now, here you two are, now very truly alone in each other's company.

[brothermoth]

That casting made me unreasonably angry why can't these shit ass directors stick to bland WW2 films where they can keep casting their unseasoned favorites??? Not to mention I have a hatred for Christopher Nolan I think he's overrated as fuck to begin with. The mfer who made Dunkirk? The cinematic equivalent of a cardboard esque communion wafer?

Your casting is one of the most important things for storytelling and if you can't cast people that will feel right in a role, then you should not be making that movie. Some actors are just not a good match for some roles. Some actors don't have the right vibes for a medieval setting, or an ancient one. There's people who are very versatile; Oscar Isaac for example is an actor who can play a tech guru or an ancient king. The casting in the Gladiator sequel felt very comfortable for the time period despite my issues with the film itself. Chalamet was good in The King, but I don't think he's a proper casting for any setting before maybe 1000AD. Matt Damon has absolutely no business playing anyone from before 1900. He has a habit of playing the same character in every role, or rather he always feels like Matt Damon. Chris Pratt is another actor who really just plays the same fucking guy always. They're not versatile.

Zendaya is a maybe. She's a good actress, but I do feel casting famous actors who are as recognizable as her can take away from their character in the film. You can't see anyone but Zendaya. Same with Tom Holland. He's trying to widen his scope but can't escape the heroic loser typecasting. It takes away from your film and I consider it a key marking of a bad director.

Cast famous actors, sure, but goddamn at least cast talented ones.

the casting choices for the odyssey are crazy i don’t think there has been a single man in 3000 years in the mediterranean with matt damon’s face

[supervisormeero]

It's "You're My Ideal Reader" day at @andorappreciation, so I wanted to take a minute to appreciate my fellow Keero writers (and everyone who has tirelessly kept our small fandom alive over the past almost-three years. I wasn't even on here for all of them!).

Here are a few of my absolute favorite Syril/Dedra fics, along with accompanying rambles about why I think they're great. I'm focusing on writers who I know are on Tumblr, but there are some great fics in the tag by people whose socials I don't know.

Now, for the fics:

A Zealous Man Burns for One Thing by unknowntelephone @lighttailoring, on here - Rating: Mature. This fic and its sequel, The Body and the Blood, are everything to me. They're technically a historical witchfinder AU (think Salem Witch Trials) with Syril as a priest and Dedra as a witchfinder. There's so much going on here, though, that calling it an AU almost does a disservice to the fic. It's so much more than that. It deals expertly with concepts of love, lust, and "sin" in the face of a harsh and unforgiving god (sounds a bit like the Empire, hm?), and the writing is spectacular. The first part serves as a retelling of the events of Andor's first season translated into a folk horror setting, and the second creates a new storyline for Syril and Dedra's characters.

Favorite excerpt: He tries to explain himself; tries to convey, in his own small, meagre way, how merely being in her presence has filled his life with grace, given it meaning. How she has shown him that, if nothing else, there is a just God. That perhaps the dream of creating His Kingdom here on Earth might be worth clinging to. She says nothing in response. Her upper lip curls into a snarl.

My Empirical Heart by limitedpractice @air-mechanical, on here - Rating: Audiences Teen and Up. This is my favorite version of the Broom Closet Scene, and I wrote a version of the Broom Closet Scene. @air-mechanical does it all: she's nailed Dedra's disorientation and fear in the moments following her salvation with expert flair, she's dug into Dedra's head to pull out why she's so fearful of being close to Syril and why it horrifies Dedra to owe someone her life, and she's written a kissing scene that balances perfectly on a thin wire between awkward and steamy. (At different points, it's both.) The writing is lush, and the characterization is impeccable. I know Tony Gilroy has said there was never a take of the Broom Closet Scene where Syril and Dedra kissed, but I think if he read this fic, he would've decided to adapt it in a flashback. @air-mechanical has plenty of other Keero works, too, and some involving Major Partagaz. Check them out!

Favorite excerpt: Dedra kisses him again. She kisses him hard, a closed mouth kiss onto his pliant lips. He has no right to be so unmoved. No right to feel so soft. No right to ignore her. No right to deny her after he’s just demonstrated that he’ll give her anything. Dedra kisses him harder. She pushes into him as if pressure is all it takes to break someone. Syril doesn't buckle. He doesn't whine. He doesn't gasp and pass out and hit his head. He doesn't do any of the things she's told herself that he'd do, that she was looking forward to him doing, that she needs him to do.

He just stands there.

Christmas in Evergreen by SerenaMandrake @calidris-pygmaea, on here - Rating: General Audiences. Last year, around Christmas, a few of us were throwing around the idea of putting Syril and Dedra in a trope-riddled Hallmark-movie scenario with Dedra as a corporate lawyer and Syril as a small-town cop. @calidris-pygmaea actually wrote it, thank goodness, and it's everything I could've hoped for. It's a hilarious, anti-Hallmark Christmas story, with two people who forge a bond based on how much they hate Christmas (and how much they love their jobs). There's genuine warmth in it, even though the two main characters remain cold as ever. (As they should and would be.) This one, too, has a sequel in Fifty-Five Cubits an Hour, which turns up the heat but maintains the humor and creativity of the original. Both of these fics are hot chocolate on a chilly day, to me. @calidris-pygmaea has also written other Keero one-shots and multichapters, so check them out!

Favorite excerpt: Every single radio station is playing the same carols, and Dedra is driving too fast. It's two days before Christmas, and she'd assumed that no-one in this hopeless town would be bothering to give speeding tickets. They're barely bothering to keep anything else functioning — every document she needs has been more difficult to acquire than it should have been, and even locating a cup of coffee at 6am was a challenge. But about the speeding tickets, she was wrong.

Scattered Wavelengths by unknowntelephone @lighttailoring, on here - Rating: Mature. This fic is an excellent example of what Syril and Dedra's relationship could be. Syril brings Dedra to a special place from his past, and it means everything to him to have her there. At the same time, Dedra tries desperately to figure out why this is so important to him, and on what level, if any, she should care about this place or the man who'd brought her there. The writing is descriptive, sharp, and accurate to the show. As a bonus, there's even some Uncle Harlo backstory. It's a sweet moment in the lives of two relatively bitter Imperials. I would also like to recommend several other works of @lighttailoring's, but they are very VERY explicit and I'm not sure that's allowed for Andor Appreciation Week. If you're 18+ and okay with reading smut, they're extremely well done.

Favorite excerpt: She suddenly wants to get closer to him. Her legs carry her, almost unbidden, across the half-metre of concrete and rusted railing between her body and his. She wants to look into his eyes like she does with her suspects; to locate the speck of whatever emotion it is that he’s feeling and lock onto it, isolate it, draw it in and absorb it into herself so she can inoculate herself against it. But he’s too quick for her - he steps behind her swiftly and slides his arms around her, his chin gently brushing against the top of her head.

The absolute fucking audacity. 

In Limbo by weirdopalido @karnpuffs, on here - Rating: Audiences Teen and Up. There is nothing tumblr user karnpuffs can't do. Art? She's got it. Memes? You know it. Hilarious fanvids of Dedra's brain making Windows XP error noises? Absolutely. Bracelets based on Syril's cereal? No problem. But you might not have known that tumblr user karnpuffs also writes, and I absolutely love her version of how Syril and Dedra get away from the Ferrix riot — a question I'm not sure we'll get an answer to in canon, given the time jumps. There's so much deliciousness going on; general awkwardness from awkward people, fake dating for the sake of escape, "there was only one bed" (and who doesn't love "there was only one bed?"). There's humor and a sense of genuineness between two people who, for the first time, are really seeing each other.

Favorite excerpt: It was over. No escape, no way out. Like a reflex, she reached under her jacket for her blaster, but only held it firmly in her hand. A single shot would have jeopardized their cover, but she needed the sense of protection that holding the blaster gave her. Her throat was dry from the smoky air, she felt dizzy and had no choice but to cling to Syril for support. She gripped his arm even tighter, digging her fingers deep into his flesh through the layers of his clothing. Somehow she found comfort in the fact that she could make him feel her pain and anger.

Aren't You a Little Short for a Stormtrooper? by Sarcasmismydefaultmode @sarcasmismydefaultmode, on here - Rating: Audiences Teen and Up. Listen. This fic is fun. Back in the days when Season 2 seemed like a distant hope, the Syril/Dedra fandom saw a grainy filming photo of what looked like Dedra wearing armor and ran with it... and this fic was the result. With time an enemy of the Empire, she goes to rescue Syril before the Rebels can hunt him down and neutralize him. As bad luck would have it, she has to wear a Stormtrooper suit to do accomplish her mission. Despite the funny premise, these two are kept in character, and there are several nods to iconic moments from A New Hope in the writing. Plus, Attendant Heert is here!

Favorite excerpt: Dedra’s eyes searched his, feeling like they’d been warped back to that moment outside the ISB when he first accosted her, his eyes intense and focussed solely on her, his hand daring to reach out and cling to her arm. Just as then, there was equal parts desperation and adoration in his gaze now, only slightly tempered by the annoyance he felt towards her ambivalence for him. It fed her own irritation that he had not moved past that, had not moved past the distraction of his worship of her with the chances she had given him since Ferrix, but it also called to something in her, to her own sense of power, power that she still held over him, that he was still hers to command if she was wise.

I also want to give a shout-out to @hegodamask, who is not a writer but is an incredibly talented gifmaker and poster of meta and headcanons. She deserves so much credit for not only being a founding member of the fandom, but also for keeping us going when all we had were release date delays and trailers that looked like they were filmed underwater. You're awesome, Ellen! 💕

Another shout-out to @chipthekeeper, who both writes Velcinta fic and, as I'm sure everyone knows, has been an essential part of the Andor fandom for a very long time over at @andorshitdaily. Thank you not only for your writing (and creating the Velcinta AO3 tag!), but also for keeping our spirits up and making so many people laugh over this endless hiatus, Chip.

[ashesofdeadempires]

For dragons are fire made flesh, and fire is power.

The idea of creating a coat of arms and heraldic symbols for Ascended Astarion has been growing in my mind for quite some time. Every self-respecting vampire lord should have their own emblem — especially someone as ambitious as Ascended Astarion.

At the center of the entire composition, I envision the sun — a crucial symbol that runs through his entire narrative. He ascends and no longer fears the daylight, transforming the vampire’s greatest curse into a triumph. He proclaims himself the Sun King, and in the epilogue, he holds the title of Sunwalking Regent. To make the solar disc the emblem of a vampire is truly bold, provocative — and entirely in his character.

Astarion: This is it. The hopeless dream dreamt by all of my kind.

Against the backdrop of the sun — a red dragon. In the finale of the game, Astarion wears a magnificent outfit adorned with an embroidered red dragon, and to me, this image feels deeply symbolic. The dragon is a representation of power, destructive force, and ambition.

I also want to mention legends from A Song of Ice and Fire, like this one:

«A trader from Qarth once told me that dragons came from the moon,» blond Doreah said as she warmed a towel over the fire.

Silvery-wet hair tumbled across her eyes as Dany turned her head, curious. «The moon?»

«He told me the moon was an egg, Khaleesi,» the Lysene girl said. «Once there were two moons in the sky, but one wandered too close to the sun and cracked from the heat. A thousand thousand dragons poured forth, and drank the fire of the sun. That is why dragons breathe flame. One day the other moon will kiss the sun too, and then it will crack and the dragons will return.»

The evil chromatic dragons in D&D are primarily united by their greed and egocentrism. They have an insatiable thirst for wealth, which permeates all their actions, plans, and manipulations. These dragons are convinced that worldly treasures rightfully belong to them, and therefore they claim others' riches, disregarding all others whom they consider guilty of "stealing" what is theirs. Dragons are not interested in commerce and do not seek to use their wealth for trade; they accumulate treasures solely for the sake of possession.

Every chromatic dragon considers itself the most powerful being, worthy of ruling over all. A central element of each such dragon’s worldview is the firm belief in their inherent right to dominate and control.

Red dragons are among the most arrogant and the most greedy for treasure:

«No other dragon comes close to the arrogance of the red dragon. These creatures see themselves as kings and emperors, and view the rest of dragonkind as inferior. Believing that they are chosen by Tiamat to rule in her name, red dragons consider the world and every creature in it as theirs to command.» © Monster Manual (2014)

It's nice to see this symbol — recognizable, almost archetypal — appear on the clothing of my favorite character in the game's finale.

And you, consorts… how do you envision Lord Astarion's coat of arms? What symbols, in your opinion, should be on his banner, and what motto?

[waggtoon]

Why Maud Pie is Autistic

In honor of Autism Acceptance month, I wanted to write a piece about one of my favorite autistic characters, Maud Pie.

For those of you who don't know, Maud Pie is Pinkie Pie's older sister from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.

Now while there hasn't been any official confirmation that this character is autistic, there's actually a lot of hints that she is throughout her time on the show. Heck, in her first episode there's a ton of hints this is the case.

First off is that Maud tends to take a lot of things literally, not getting certain phrases and metaphors. Which is a trait common amongst autistic people (trust me, I know).

Maud is also shown having certain behaviors or reactions to things that others perceive as a joke, much to her confusion (again, something I'm familiar with).

There are also a few scenes in the show where Maud is seen fidgeting with her pet rock Boulder (or other rocks she finds). Often Autistic people fidget as a way to deal with strong emotions like stress, anxiety, or just boredom.

Probably the biggest hint towards Maud being autistic is that she has a special interest. Autistic people have special interests that they will hyper focus on. In Maud Pie's case, it's obviously rocks. She knows nearly every single fact about rocks, she writes poetry about rocks (they're all about rocks), and would go on to college to study geology, where she would, in the show's terms; "get a rocktorate in rock science."

There's also the fact that Maud is stated by Pinkie and shown to be very honest, like many autistic people she tells the truth even when saying said truth can be seen as rude.

I should note that while the rest of the mane six had a bit of trouble clicking with Maud the first time they met her they eventually got a better understanding of her and Maud herself would become more sociable as the series continued forming friendships with various other characters.

Personally I think one of the biggest hints that Maud is autistic comes from Issue 29 of My Little Pony: Friends Forever comic series from IDW. Now I know some people will probably interject "Hey! The comics aren't canon!" and to that I'm gonna reply to that with what official MLP artist Andy Price once stated "[the comics] are considered continuity until the show contradicts them." I don't recall anything from the show stating that this story didn't happen, so it's still part of the canon!

Anyways, in this story Rarity meets up with Maud at a "Geological and Gemological" convention where they find out that a large cave system with gems has recently been discovered under the Crystal Mountain Range and that the first pony to explore the caves will receive full credit for the discovery. Rarity brings up the idea of Maud going to the caverns, though it doesn't appear that Maud is that excited.

It is at this point another pony named Buried Treasure who is Maud's rival enters the picture, claiming she will get to the cave first to claim the credit for the discovery.

As Rarity and Maud go on their journey to get to the caverns, Rarity tries to get Maud to be more emotive and passionate, but it doesn't appear to be working.

Later on just as they're about to get close to the caves, Buried Treasure ends up burning a bridge they need to cross (torch and all) which appears to put a stop to their adventure. Rarity states how this doesn't seem to be a big loss as Maud doesn't appear to be upset, and is about to write in her diary, only to accidentally open Maud's diary instead. Maud insists that Rarity should read it, which leads us to the big reveal.

It turns out that Maud does have feelings, she gets emotional about a ton of stuff, she just isn't able to show it physically, but she's able to via writing. This is something I relate to big time. I don't have as much trouble expressing my emotions as Maud does, but at the same time, I often have difficulty expressing my full thoughts and more complex feelings via talking, though in my own head or when I write them out, I suddenly feel a whole lot more comfortable and I'm more easily able to get them out (it's one reason why this essay is a blog post and not a video).

(By the way, in case you're wondering, they do end up getting to the gem caverns first. Maud does this by breaking a hole in the wall. She's very strong.)

Going onto another subject, in 2023 Lauren Faust (the creator of Friendship is Magic) confirmed on Twitter that she created Pinkie Pie with the idea that she would be neurodivergent (more specifically ADHD).

Now while ADHD isn't the same as Autism, the two are often linked, as many people who are diagnosed with one will often be diagnosed with the other. So it's very likely that Pinkie Pie has autism as well. She does have several autistic traits, like misunderstanding more complex things, having a special interest in parties to where she can memorize everyone's birthday amongst several other party related facts, heck, even her occasional bouncing and wiggling around could be seen as a kind of stimming (possible essay for later: "Is Pinkie Sense a form of stimming that can predict the future").

Now there may be a few of you that may say, "But WaggToon, Maud and Pinkie can't both have autism, they're completely different. It doesn't make sense!" To which I say, "Yes it does" because there's more than just one kind of autism. Autism can effect people differently, some people might have difficulty with loud noises, others don't, some people like to follow a specific routine, others like to be more unpredictable, some people are more introverted and quiet, other's are a lot more extroverted and love to be loud and crazy (do those last two sound familiar?).

Maud and Pinkie might not be the only autistic representation here, over the years I've seen several arguments from fans stating that certain characters could be part of the spectrum. Twilight Sparkle because she likes to follow the rules, Starlight Glimmer because she has a special interest in kites, Rainbow Dash because she has trouble paying attention, amongst several others! I could be here all day going over why multiple characters could be considered to be autistic. That's one reason why My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic has such a huge autistic following, because we see ourselves in these characters.

I'm probably closer to a Pinkie Pie than I am a Maud Pie, but I still remember when I first saw Maud in her debut episode, there was just something about her that made me go "Ah yes, this is me. I feel seen."

Happy Autism Acceptance Month everybody. Remember to be like Maud and rock on.

[bearloonz]

Favorite and least favorite aspects of psychonauts' design philosophy? Not just visually but gameplay and level design counts too

i think my favorite thing about psychonauts design is how they utilize their enemies in levels. Even when youre being attacked and it can kind of feel like busywork, what enemies they choose to put in a level and where will still tell you something about the characters mental state (or at least give you something to think about for fun) and i have just been so charmed by that.

i dont think i have any overall issues with psychonauts design but i do have one level nitpick in psychonauts 2 which is that i hate the blanket statement they setup for how Raz helps Hollis after breaking her mental world. “I know making bad connections is what got me into this mess, but i think making some good ones might be what i need to fix it” or whatever. Bc a lot of Hollis’ “incorrect” connections directly correspond to her being a black woman in a struggling system who forced herself into isolation at some point and the idea that Raz is fixing these connections by making them for the first time and not just, idk, them being ideas she already had before the mix-up and therefore Raz is just re-routing them to normal always kind of wigged me out. It just feels like a poor explanation that really could’ve just been fixed with a different line of dialogue.

Also wait one more thing i hate how much prompting dialogue raz has in psychonauts 2. I hate that he has lines telling you exactly how to solve a puzzle if you spend too long on it whether the player wants it or not and i hate it in comptons cook off when you end a round and Raz goes “let’s take a break :D” and then five minutes later keeps talking about how Hey We Should Press The Big Red Button and Start the Next Round of Ram it Down in Comptons Cookoff. Boy quiet.

[midnight1nk]

would you like to ramble about thoughts on the one Four scene we had in the movie?

my time has come......

(literally, probably expect a college thesis if there was an ask letting me ramble about 4/goop!4/heterochromia 4, puzzlevision+/the showgrounds/etc. I would be so hooked)

First thing's first, a fact about me: like anyone would, I have a collection of favorite characters, right? Well, I have a subcategory in what I call "saviors in blue" ↓

my boys 🥹💙 actually I picked some traits here and there for my oc as inspo. so anyway we gotta talk the specialest of boys, our blue meme guardian 4!

oh, where do I even start? 4, throughout the whole arc, was such a sweetheart. Lending a supportive hand to Karen, just giving comfort in general. And y'know he would spoil Beeg4 rotten, with ice cream. He may not be a fighter, but he has to try. Then the explosion happened. Dude, I'm telling you, I SPIRALED in devastation bc I knew something was wrong when the team didn't do it ragdoll style and the music stopped for a bit. I mean yall know that already. Coma 4 and goop!4 happened during the wait. Then the movie comes along, I see the Castle pop up on screen, and:

HE'S OKAY 😭💙

bandaged but okayyyy. Honestly, it's way better than having him be fine without any elaboration.... and ig coma 4 bc I would be on the news if it happened, even if it would be interesting to see how the show would go on like that.

Can we talk about the bandages? Let's talk about the bandages.

I suspected that it had technically been a few days after the "Enough is Enough" episode, so 4 probably was recovering during that time. Also hc that the true reason the lights are off at the Castle was so 4 doesn't have to exert himself and start to get a headache from his head injury. Look, I may not be a medical expert, but I don't think that the collision is the only reason why he needed those bandages. Sure, at best, he would have a head and back injury. I could excuse the arm sling if the fall was that bad. BUT I can't be the only one who sees this, right?

The fact that:

wrap around his head covers exactly where his lobotomy scar would be — it makes sense for his head injury

sling on his right arm is the same arm that broke free from IGBP corruption

bandaid placed on top of his logo and his cheek, both on the left — I mean... yall should know who I am by this point. anyway his perfectionist side needs healing/the goo's forced to be involved in the healing process :))

(sidenote: i think, i may be stupid, but i think 4 got a gash from "Enough is Enough" across his right cheek/jawline but doesn't in the movie. pretty sure that's dirt. yeah probably but it looks different to me ok?)

We were probably right of him constantly had to heal himself from his past injuries and the explosion was the final nail in the coffin, not literally though.

so anyway goop!4 might be canon— *gets run over by bus*

There's a reason why I brought up the bandages first, and that's just so we can talk about 4's advice, my favorite part about this scene. Like we already knew, 4 isn't the type to fight to fend for himself/until it's absolutely necessary, but he's willing to be there for people. And it would be within his character to be standing while he's still recovering. After all, he didn't know WPNZ, but he must've known something was wrong for Karen to come to the castle without her kids beside her. The lament of a mother, wanting to drink her sorrows away. She needed someone to lift up her crushing troubles, so despite whatever pain he had, his friends always came first. (...and I'm already starting to tear up again thinking about this scene fuck)

Taking 4's speech, as in 4 the character by itself, what he says comes from a place of familiarity. He knows what it's like to protect loved ones at all costs. What does it mean to sacrifice, to keep them happy. The way he does it, he creates content for YT. Makes sure his friends are happy and okay. Perhaps he realized it or not, simply 4 being there matters a lot for the rest of the Crew. As said in "SMG4 doesn't meme for 1 second", the Crew even admits that they appreciate his presence and humor as a part of their lives. No matter what happens, 4 will try to be there for them.

He would truly do anything to not lose his friends *head in hands*

There's another layer to the same familiarity: Luke talking directly to us through the screen. Long ago, Luke wanted to follow the passion that made him happy (animation) and it was actually Kevin who supported him. Their parents eventually came around, but if it weren't for Kev, the SMG4 show would've been discontinued before the Waluigi arc. Glitch would have never existed. And Luke is forever grateful that his brother was by his side, supporting him with what was considered at the time a risky choice. All it takes is one person's support to make a difference. 4's scene is a retelling of Luke's story and hope that anyone could be that person for something else, to be happy. Siblings, friends, parents. All it takes is one.

It has a very IGBP kinda vibe and mixing these layers together, it really got me in my feels, hopefully the Team would do more stuff like this. Man, how can you hate 4? no seriously, how? I can never understand it, let's blame reddit for that.

so anyway, heterochromia 4 :D

thanks for letting me ramble!

(just a sidenote here uh, I'm SO sorry it took so long to answer. tumblr literally deleted my draft when I was post it, my ramblings were too strong 😔 /lh)

[erimeows]

To My Lieutenant

It’s 9PM. 

Roy Mustang is frustrated as he sits alone in his office, finding the room to be all too quiet. The team is gone on a mission, even having taken Falman, who usually stays behind, along with them. They’ve been gone for a few days, with Roy unable to leave with them because he’d contracted a stomach bug the night before they were set to leave for South City. So, now, he’s spent the days since his recovery from the illness alone in his office at eastern command, painfully bored and alone. 

The office is too quiet without them. It’s the kind of quiet that’s always driven Roy insane, settling in thick and cloying, made heavier by the late hour and the weight of everything Roy can’t say. It’s too quiet without her. And Riza is quiet, anyway, but she at least makes the quiet comfortable. Easy. Lovely, even.

He’s been bored since the team’s departure, which is never good, because when Roy gets bored, he gets stupid- just like he is right now. He’s sitting at his desk, elbows propped up on either side of an open notebook, hands threaded into his hair like a man bracing for impact. A single desk lamp casts golden light over the mahogany surface, catching the fine lines of the smeared ink stains on the paper and the crumpled papers to his right- evidence of his previous failed attempts. 

This one, the fifth attempt, lies flat beneath his gloved fingers. 

‘Lieutenant Hawkeye’, he writes first and instantly hates it because it’s too cold and formal considering what he plans to say to her after it. He scratches it out so hard with the pen that his fingers burn from how firmly he’s gripping it as he stares at the page with his jaw tense and his charcoal eyes narrow. ‘Riza,’ he tries next, though that’s not quite right either. It’s just her name, but he doesn’t ever call her by it. Doesn’t deserve to call her by it. The mere sight of her name makes his chest tighten and even though he’s sitting down in his desk chair, he feels the intense urge to take a physical step back. So, he crosses it out as well.

Maybe a pet name, like ‘my love’ or ‘sweetheart’ or ‘darling’? No, they’re not even dating. Lieutenant Hawkeye is too distant, Riza is too close, the pet names are even worse. Maybe he shouldn’t title it at all. He sits there with the tip of his pen on the paper besides the previously crossed out attempts, watching the green ink pool in a small blot. He used green because she mentioned once when they were teenagers that green was her favorite color, like the forest that she would hunt for meat in to feed her ailing father, because it was the one spot where she felt at peace. Roy wonders if that even applies these days. It doesn’t matter. It’s not like he’ll actually give her the letter, anyway- he never does… And if he does, surely, the last thing on her mind will be the color of the ink. 

Still, Roy tries to write. 

‘To my lieutenant,’

Better. Not too cold but not too intimate either. 

‘I think of you more often than I should.’

Lame. Havoc, Breda, and Catalina would surely make fun of him if they ever knew about this. Still, he continues.

‘I admire you.’

That doesn’t convey the extent of his feelings towards her quite enough, but it’s a start.

‘You’re invaluable to me.’

It’s a little stiff, but then again, they’re always a little stiff towards each other. Maybe it’ll be fine.

‘I don’t know how to say this out loud.’

Pathetic. 

Each sentence seems to get progressively worse until the love letter in front of him is nothing but an inane, groveling, embarrassing mess of a confession that Roy himself would be humiliated to receive. Once again, he’s frustrated with himself. He’s upset about Riza’s absence, but he had wanted to use the time to collect himself enough to confess. Yet, here he is, unable to do it despite the fact that he’s had literal days. And he can’t understand why it’s so damn hard. He’s been in the military for years, facing humanity’s worst horrors and dealing with the most unpleasant of characters, yet he’s rendered useless by a fucking love letter. Someone might as well have tossed him out in the rain like a stray cat. 

Useless, useless, useless. Just like Riza has always said. 

The worst part is that, after he sits there for a moment trying to put the pieces together, he can understand why he’s having so much trouble. It’s because this matters- because she matters- more to him than anything or anyone else. Because if he actually says it- really says it, or writes it, or expresses it in a manner other than a stolen glance when she isn’t looking- and she looks at him with that polite yet steely, cold calm of hers before shooting him down, Roy doesn’t know if he’ll recover from it. The mere possibility of her rejecting the confession makes Roy want to light himself and the letters on fire at the same time. 

He lets out a sharp, shallow exhale through his nostrils. His hand is clutching the pen so hard that his knuckles burn. Still, he writes. 

‘I love you.’

There it is. Just three words at the bottom of the paper, looking so much smaller than everything else he’s written in his blocky handwriting. He feels the need to write an apology right underneath them. His throat tightens, his heart pounds against his ribcage, and his head spins. 

Panic hits him in an instant. What if she sees this and thinks less of him? What if she doesn’t feel the same? What if someone else finds out? She’s all he has left- the last thing he needs is to ruin everything with this stupid letter and his stupid feelings. It’s pitiful, but his eyes sting with tears at the thought of higher command finding out and separating them by force, or worse, her choosing to leave his side over this. He’d rather have her close and blissfully unaware every day than have her figure out the truth and leave him. 

Cursing underneath his breath, Roy rips the page from the notebook and tears it straight down the middle once, then twice; again and again until the pieces are like white confetti where he shoves them into the bottom of the deskside trash can with a yell that startles even himself. 

“Damn it!” 

It’s so loud that it booms, echoing in the room, and Roy is incredibly glad that virtually no one is at headquarters this late. 

Then, the door slowly creaks open. 

Roy freezes in place- sitting in his chair, hands deep in the trash can, eyes wide and body trembling with frustration. Falman stands in the doorway, looking something akin to a startled animal; hands nervously wrung together, eyes unblinking, body stiff. Then, he salutes, to which Roy waves him off and leans back against the back of the chair in a desperate attempt to pretend that nothing has happened even though Falman probably heard him throwing his temper tantrum from down the hall. 

Well. At least it’s not Riza. If it were Riza, she would ask a myriad of pointed questions until she wrung the truth out of him like water out of a rag. Falman, on the other hand, knows better to pry since he can’t get away with it like Riza can. 

“Colonel Mustang?” Falman starts, voice a little shaky with what Roy assumes is fear.

From the yelling. Of course. Falman is such a sensitive, easily startled soul that Roy wonders why the man joined the military in the first place. Not that he doesn’t like having him around… In fact, out of everyone on the team who could’ve shown up during his pseudo-meltdown, Falman was probably the least bad option. Though, if Roy could’ve had it his way, no one would’ve shown up at all. 

“You’ve returned to bring me the report from South City, I assume?” Roy grumbles in an attempt to shield the mixture of embarrassment and anger coursing through his veins. 

“Yes, sir. I wrote it on the train ride back,” Falman approaches the desk and gently drops the report onto it. Roy picks up the manilla folder, opens it, and skims the report. It’s unremarkable, and everyone has returned alive and uninjured. Roy lets out a sigh of relief. His team is competent. He doesn’t doubt them. Still, he worries about not being around to protect them, even if it is technically their job to protect him. Roy glances up at Falman with a small, tired smile. He expects Falman to excuse himself after that, but instead, the silver-haired man is asking- “I apologize if I’m overstepping, but… Are you alright?”

“Just fine,” Roy lies through his teeth and puts the mission report in one of the desk drawers. 

“Is there anything I can do for you?” Falman asks, awkward but sincere, clearly not believing Roy but not exactly pushing for an answer. Just for a way to make him feel better. “To help?”

At that, he lets out a soft sigh. Were it anyone outside of his team, he would tell them to fuck right off, but… Well, his team has slowly but surely softened him over the years. 

His gaze flickers to the trash can. Falman is trustworthy, and unlike Havoc or Breda or even Riza, he isn’t nosy enough to try to reassemble the torn letter- or even to go through Roy’s trash if the papers in it were left whole. Save for the most recent one that’s been torn to shreds, the other failed drafts are so roughly scribbled over that Roy doesn’t think they’re legible either.

But it doesn’t matter. Falman won’t go through any of it. At least, Roy doesn’t think he would. Admittedly, he doesn’t know Falman very well. The man is a bit closed off, something of an enigma. All he knows is that Falman is a kind person who generally prefers to stay out of other people’s business. 

“There’s some… Discarded files here in the trash can,” Roy explains with exhaustion lacing every word. “Run them through the shredder for me and make sure they’re properly disposed of before you go home.”

“Yes, sir.”

With that, Roy grabs his coat from the back of his chair, yanks it over his shoulders, and storms out of the room. The door slams behind him with a force that rattles the wood in its frame. 

He’s going to have to apologize to Falman later, but right now, he’s just angry- and he doesn’t know who or what he’s angry at; himself for being such a coward, Riza for making him feel this way, Falman for interrupting his meltdown, or the world for giving him a thousand battles to fight but never quite the right words to win them- just alchemical prowess, and look how far that’s gotten him… 

It doesn’t matter. Falman is going to run everything from the trash can through the shredder and come first thing tomorrow morning, they'll be at work, and things will be normal again. They have to be. 

~

Falman does not, in fact, run everything from the trash can through the shredder while Colonel Mustang is gone. He considers it at first, really, because he tends to follow orders without question. But then, he goes over to the trash can and picks it up by the rim. And there are so many things throwing him off that he can’t just ignore it. 

The first thing that throws him off is Colonel Mustang’s odd behavior. He seemed so angry, but not in the usual ill-tempered way, more like… Frustrated. Hurt. The sight had been worrying, especially combined with the way his voice had trembled as he’d rushed to give Falman the order to shred the trash can’s contents and leave. Even the office feels different now, with the desk lamp left on and a forgotten blue mug still half full of cold coffee left alone on the desk. The desk chair isn’t pushed back in and one of the desk drawers is left half open. The desktop is even worse, scattered in papers. It isn’t like Colonel Mustang to leave in such a rush. 

The second thing that throws him off is the trash can. He picks it up and starts up the paper shredder on top of his own desk in the middle of the room. The basket is fuller than it usually is by the end of the day, crammed with off-white wads of paper that appear to be from a notebook or maybe a legal pad rather than from the corporate-white copy paper used at eastern command. Something about the way the one at the top is shredded, uneven and reeking desperation, makes Falman pause and grab a piece. He’s terrified that something is seriously wrong; that Colonel Mustang is in danger, or that he’s lost someone, or that there’s a big secret he’s not telling the team about. Trying to piece it together, Falman takes a shredded piece of paper that has remnants of what he thinks is the word ‘worthy’ on it. The ink smears underneath his fingers, meaning that it’s still fresh. Then, he notices the color of the ink. 

The third thing that throws him off is green ink. Not blue or black like the Amestrian military requires to be used for paperwork, but deep forest green. Lieutenant Hawkeye’s favorite color- and that’s not something that most people know, but Falman remembers overhearing her mentioning it to Catalina once at lunch- and he knows that Colonel Mustang would remember it, too. 

An odd mixture of juvenile curiosity and genuine concern gets the better of Falman. 

And so, he shuts off the shredder, locks the office door, draws the blinds, and sits at Colonel Mustang’s desk with the trash can full of shredded paper, a pair of tweezers, a roll of tape, and his own guilt. He lays the fragments carefully across the desktop, sorting through them like a puzzle. The Colonel has torn them up so small that it takes a while for Falman to put them back together. The job is so difficult that he suspects no one else on Team Mustang would’ve been able to do it, had they been the one to show up and find Colonel Mustang in his foul mood with the torn up letter in the trash can. 

He’s gentle with the paper, his movements with the tweezers precise and practiced as he forms it back into a perfect rectangle of pieces that fit together just fight. Though this isn’t intelligence gathering or memorization, it feels just as important. When he gets the final piece in place, he tapes the letter together and reads over it.

‘To my lieutenant,’ at the beginning, and then, at the end… ‘I love you. I’m sorry. -Colonel Mustang,’.

The words are scrawled in unmistakable handwriting; blocky and in a peculiar font that’s exclusively uppercase. The writer is loving, but not good at expressing it, though also somehow concise and… Oddly self deprecating in a way that Falman doesn’t even find humorous. Definitely Roy Mustang. The letter is a mess, scribbled out titles and sentences everywhere, paragraphs of fumbling emotion that trails off into an odd mixture of groveling, self-hatred, and devotion. 

It’s for Lieutenant Hawkeye. The context given in the letter- ‘my lieutenant’, something he’s called her before- a mention of how long they’ve known each other, makes it all too obvious. 

Falman’s breath catches. He blinks once, then twice to make sure he’s seeing correctly.

He’s not surprised to receive confirmation that Colonel Mustang is in love with Lieutenant Hawkeye. Even though he’s not the most socially aware, he knows, and he’s certain that everyone else does too. There’s something deep between them, formed over many years of friendship. And maybe it’s not healthy. Maybe what they have is codependent. But it’s there, and they love each other. Falman had assumed that they were together in secret, probably, though the tone of the letter suggests that it’s meant to be a confession.

One that Colonel Mustang ripped up and threw in the trash can. 

What he is surprised about is the letter itself. The proof that Colonel Mustang seems to want to confess but… Can’t. 

Falman holds the taped up letter in his hands, analyzing it again, letting the weight of it settle on his shoulders.

What should he even do with this?

The obvious answer is nothing. Run the letter along with the rest of the trash through the shredder and pretend it didn’t happen. It’s not Falman’s place, not his business. 

But then again… Throwing away something so loving and genuine just feels wrong. It would hurt his heart to do that, especially knowing it pertains to two people he considers valuable comrades- no, friends. And it’s going to be hard now, to watch the colonel look at his lieutenant like she’s the only thing tethering him to the world with the knowledge that she has no idea- probably because he does foolish things like writing professions of love that wind up in the trash instead of actually telling her. Something- someone needs to stop Colonel Mustang before he ends up wasting years of his life pining after Lieutenant Hawkeye without telling her the truth. 

Falman folds up the letter, puts it in a clean envelope that he tucks into the pocket of his uniform pants, shreds the rest of the papers in the trash can, and puts the trash can back by Colonel Mustang’s desk. Then, against his better judgment, he goes to the phone on the wall and calls Havoc, who he hopes has arrived back home from their mission in South City. 

He picks up. 

“Second Lieutenant Jean Havoc speaking,” Havoc’s voice rings through the other end instantly.

“It’s me,” Falman says while looking over his shoulder like he’s in the midst of committing a crime. Maybe he is. Even if he isn’t, what he’s about to do- divulging what he’s found to the rest of the team to get their advice on the matter- is punishable by being burned to death… By Colonel Roy Mustang, who will surely want to turn them all to charcoal if (or, when) he finds out about this. “Can you and the others meet me at Panda House?” 

“The takeout place on main street?” Havoc questions, his tone more casual now that he knows it’s just Falman calling him.

“Yes,” Falman answers. “If you need the exact address, it’s-”

“I know the damn address,” Havoc grumbles. Falman hears the sound of a sharp exhale- probably him blowing smoke from a cigarette into the living room- along with what sounds like the voice of Rebecca Catalina on the other end. “What’s this about?”

Falman shrinks into himself a little, grip tightening on the phone. It’s not a bright idea to explain this on a military-monitored line where anyone could be listening. 

“I’ll explain when we get there. And whatever you do, don’t bring Colonel Mustang or Lieutenant Hawkeye.”

A pause, and then-

“Yeah, uh, okay. Meet you in ten.”

-before Havoc hangs up. 

~

Falman is surprised to find that, by the time he arrives at Panda House, everyone is already there; Havoc and Catalina set next to each other at a table near a window, Fuery and Breda sat across from them, and an empty single chair at the side of the table left for Falman. It feels weird, gathering here without both Colonel Mustang and Lieutenant Hawkeye present, but it’s for the best. 

Falman swallows his nerves, approaches the table, and sits down. He barely even gets to order his food before Havoc is leaning forward to ask-

“So? What’s this about?”

Suddenly, Falman doubts coming here- telling them. Colonel Mustang’s letter suddenly feels like a massive weight that’s about to tear through his pocket. It’s personal. Private. He wants to help the colonel and his lieutenant so badly, but at the same time, if he goes through with this… It’s a massive breach of trust that he may not be able to come back from. 

“Who said it had to be about anything?” Falman asks and shoves his hand into his pocket to nervously grip the taped-together paper. 

“With all due respect, Falman… We usually have to drag you out of the house to get you to do anything with us,” Fuery points out, and it’s true. Falman has never been the most social man and would prefer a quiet night in with statistics books and tea rather than the wild nights out that Team Mustang usually prefers. While he loves them, it’s not infrequent for him to ditch their get-togethers, and it’s definitely an infrequent occurrence for him to invite them anywhere other than his house- let alone a big restaurant in the middle of the night. “This is out of character for you. Is everything alright?”

“What he said but meaner,” Breda reiterates between bites of his food. He’s already cleared two appetizer plates, with the second being a few takoyaki balls drowned in eel sauce and chives. “Cut to the chase.”

“Damn, get off the guy’s dick and let him breathe for a sec before you hound him. He just got here,” Catalina cuts in and reaches across the table to steal a takoyaki ball off of Breda’s plate. She eats it, then slams down what appears to be Havoc’s can of sake. Neither man dares to complain about it. “You good, Falman?”

“I’m good. Thank you, Catalina, but they’re right… I should get to the point. You all were very kind to come here without any explanation and I don’t want to waste more of your time since I’m sure you’re tired from our mission to South City… There’s no easy way to explain this, so I’ll just show you,” Falman clears his throat, takes the letter out of his pocket, smooths it out the best he can, and lays it out flat on the table. “I found this in Colonel Mustang’s trashcan after I stopped at headquarters to drop off the mission report. Please read it.”

Everyone stops to look over the letter, leaning in with interest, eyes wide. The reactions would be comical if Falman wasn’t so nervous. Havoc’s cigarette falls out of his open mouth and he’s so stunned that he doesn’t even notice, with Catalina having to grab it and put it out. Breda nearly spits out his food. Fuery chokes on his drink a little, his soda going up his nose to the point that he’s coughing from the burn. And Falman just sits there, shifting uncomfortably, waiting for someone to say something- anything. 

“Did he… Really write this to her?” Fuery mumbles, squinting at the words like he can’t quite believe them, but there’s no denying the truth. 

It’s Colonel Mustang’s handwriting, Colonel Mustang’s very distinct style of speaking that- weirdly enough- manages to carry over to paper, even though what he’s written is much more vulnerable than anything he’d ever dare say aloud. 

“Holy shit, dude!” Havoc laughs, cobalt eyes blown wide as they flicker from the letter to Falman’s face. “Mustang’s gonna fuckin’ kill you if he finds out you took this out of the trash and pieced it back together!”

“Not if Hawkeye doesn’t get to him first,” Breda snorts, all but snatching the letter out of Falman’s hands and chortling as he rereads the words. “This is priceless!”

Suddenly, Falman feels incredibly bad, because it isn’t funny. At least not to him. This is serious- his friends are struggling to communicate their feelings to each other, but they deserve to be in love and happy, and Breda and Havoc are laughing! Almost as if she can read his thoughts, Catalina shoots Breda a death glare and snatches the letter out of his hands. 

“Look, as much as I would love to shit on Roy Mustang, we are not going to sit here and make fun of someone that Riza loves like this, so shut your mouths before I shut them for you,” Her tone is firm and unforgiving. Unsurprisingly, Havoc and Breda shut up immediately. Then, her attention is back on the letter in her hands. “Honestly, as much as I hate the guy… This makes me like him a little more. Not that the bar is very high- it’s just underground instead of in the pits of hell now, but still. I mean, ‘you’re invaluable to me’ and ‘you are the reason that I get out of bed’ are… Very sweet, in a weird, fucked up kinda way? I almost can’t believe that guy actually wrote something like this.”

“Yeah,” Breda sighs, gently plucking the letter back from Catalina’s hands. “He wrote something like this and then tore it up and trashed it like one of my little brothers throwing a toddler tantrum. Seems in character to me.”

Falman frowns, just slightly. They’re all talking about the letter’s contents, about why Colonel Mustang tore it up instead of giving it to her. Meanwhile, he’s just sitting there wondering where to go with this, not any less confused than he was when he initially pieced the torn paper back together. The waiter drops off his food and all he can hear are his coworkers gossipping about the language in the letter, about its self-deprecating nature and the implications about how long the colonel has felt this way. 

“It’s giving… Nervous breakdown,” Catalina says with a somewhat nervous chuckle. “Should we be worried about him?”

“Since when are you worried about the chief?” Havoc says with a raised eyebrow and crossed arms.

“Since my best friend’s been in love with him for- like- ever! I don’t care about him, but I care about Riza, so I have to care about him at least a little.”

Typical couple’s bickering. It reminds Falman of why he’s here- to hopefully help Lieutenant Hawkeye and Colonel Mustang get to the point that couples like Havoc and Catalina are at- not able to scream their love for each other from the rooftops due to fraternization laws, but at least being able to be honest with each other in more private settings. 

“The question is,” Falman breaks in, taking the letter back and returning it to the envelope before putting it back into his pocket. The last thing he needs is for it to get lost or to end up in the wrong hands. “What do we do with this information? That’s why I called you guys here.”

“If you were smart,” Breda starts, leaning back in his chair so far that it almost tips back. He takes a moment to regain his stability before leaning forward to rest his elbows on the table. “You’d swear us to secrecy, burn the damn thing, and pretend it didn’t happen. But based on the fact that you called us here instead of doing that in the first place, I’m assuming you’re not going that route.”

“You’d be assuming right. I know it’s not like me to involve myself in other people’s personal affairs, but I really want to help them,” He sighs. “I’m a little odd. I have unconventional interests, an unconventional face- I’m antisocial and awkward. I know that… And because of that, I’ve gone through almost my entire life feeling like I don’t belong, but then I joined Team Mustang and you guys… Make me feel like I do belong. And they’re a part of that. They’ve done a lot for us- for me. They deserve it… To be happy with each other. So, if I am capable of providing even a modicum of assistance in getting them there, I want to be able to do that… But this isn’t my area of expertise. I need help, too.”

Almost all at once, the atmosphere at the table seems to soften. Catalina reaches over, placing a reassuring hand on Falman’s table and giving him a smile that Havoc matches. Fuery offers a reassuring nod, and Breda goes back to munching his food as Falman starts to pick at his food. 

“So we’ll help,” Fuery says. “You just need help coming up with some sort of plan, right? To make them talk?”

“Ooh, leave the letter in Hawkeye’s desk for her to find!” Havoc suggests with an alarming amount of enthusiasm, but Catalina immediately shoots him down.

“Hell no! She’ll think it’s a prank or something and trash it. You could hit her over the head with a brick made from that man’s feelings and she still wouldn’t get it- I’ve been trying to convince her for years that he likes her back and she’s in crazy denial. Hell, one year I tried leaving chocolates at her desk, forged his signature on the box and everything, and she thought it was someone fucking with her and threw them in the trash! Do you know how much those chocolates cost!?”

“I know I do. I paid your water bill that month because for some reason you thought it was a good idea to buy Hawkeye hundred of cens worth of chocolate for your little scheme,” Havoc snorts. “Maybe just tell her that he likes her without involving the letter?”

“No, Catalina just said she’s been trying to do that for years,” Fuery frowns. “If Hawkeye won’t accept the truth from her best friend, she won’t accept it from any of us, especially without proof.”

“But we can’t just leave the proof and run either. If Colonel Mustang intercepts it, he’ll figure it was one of us- the plan’s over and we’ll all be in our own little pyre by the end of the work day.”

Breda has a point. They all do. There’s no way that just leaving the letter somewhere for Lieutenant Hawkeye to find will produce any results, and trying to convince her of Colonel Mustang’s feelings without it hasn’t done anyone any favors either. So-

“One of us will have to explain the situation with the letter… Hopefully she’ll take it as proof. It is undeniable that he wrote it- I mean, she knows his handwriting and… None of us have any reason to lie to her,” It’s not a full proof plan, and there’s a good chance that Lieutenant Hawkeye will be very angry with them for this, but it’s better than nothing. “Who wants to tell her?”

Suddenly, everyone at the table is avoiding eye contact, looking away from Falman and focusing on their food or a window or the wood grain of the table. No one wants to do it, because they would be admitting to meddling in the colonel and the lieutenant’s personal life. A grave offense. Even Rebecca Catalina, Riza Hawkeye’s best friend aside from Colonel Mustang himself, is whistling and tapping a perfectly painted fingernail against the tabletop. Falman can’t blame them. 

Lieutenant Hawkeye is sweet behind her steely exterior, but she is also… Terrifying. At least to anyone who’s seriously wronged her. 

Falman hasn’t witnessed it since he doesn’t frequently join the team on their outings and specializes in office work, but he’s heard the infamous stories; of the time that an officer tried to grope Lieutenant Hawkeye at a military gala and got his head smashed into a table before the colonel could even register what had happened, of the time that a wanted criminal had tried to steal her purse and wound up apprehended on the street with nothing but the lieutenant’s winter scarf, and- perhaps the most terrifying of all- the time that she’d supposedly threatened to shoot even Colonel Mustang in the back during a heated mission with Havoc because he ‘stepped away from his path’, whatever the hell that means. 

Falman doesn’t think that what he’s doing is quite as bad as attempted sexual assault, attempted robbery, or whatever it was that Colonel Mustang did on that mission to make his lieutenant pull a gun on him, but it is a breach of trust and privacy. It is wildly unprofessional and while there is the possibility that Lieutenant Hawkeye will handle it maturely like she handles most other things, anyone who takes on this task is at risk. Maybe not at risk of being shot or arrested or table-smashed, but even just one of her icy glares is enough to put a man in serious pain, and Falman has the constitution of a wet napkin. 

But Falman, while not the strongest person, is also determined to help his friends. 

So, he says-

“Alright, then… I guess I’ll do it. Tomorrow morning.”

~

Riza Hawkeye shows up to work the next morning, still exhausted from her mission with the team to South City. With Roy out sick for the first day of it, she had been left in charge, and commanding the team- along with her friend, Rebecca Catalina, who had been temporarily assigned to them for it- proved to be a tiring ordeal with Havoc, Breda, and Rebecca arguing pretty much the entire time. 

Now that she’s back, excitement is drumming through her veins at the thought of seeing her colonel, Roy Mustang. She shows up early, only to find that he’s not there, which is unusual. He always arrives at six in the morning- an hour before their shift is set to start. The office is in disarray, too, with his mug still half full with coffee left on the desk from the night before, the lamp flickering- probably from being left on for too long, and the papers on the desktop a scattered mess. Even one of the desk drawers is slightly pulled out. 

The whole scene is confusing. Did her absence really put Roy in such horrible disarray?

Riza cleans up the office the best she can; straightens the papers on the desk without really looking at them, pushes in the half-open drawer, turns off the lamp, opens the blinds, and takes Roy’s abandoned coffee cup to the staff lounge to wash it out. When she’s done, she returns to the office, only to see that Vato Falman is there.

Alright. This is really odd. With her and Roy showing up ridiculously early, Fuery showing up around ten minutes before their shift, and Breda and Havoc always strolling in late, Falman is the one member on their team that can be counted on to show up on seven on the dot. He doesn’t show up early because of his tendency to dodge potentially awkward social situations like they’re literal bullets, but he’s too punctual to show up late. So, for him to be here only a few minutes past six is… Alarming. 

Riza walks in and shuts the door behind her. Falman, who tends to startle easily, doesn’t jump. Instead, he turns from where he’s standing in front of her desk to look at Riza like he was waiting for her to arrive. 

“Falman,” Riza greets him, wary. 

“Hawkeye,” Falman stands from his desk and approaches her like a frightened animal with an envelope held tightly in his thin, large hands. “May I speak with you privately for a moment? Since we’re both already here alone.”

At that, Riza’s brow furrows, her mind racing with possibilities. Their mission in South City went smoothly… Or maybe it didn’t? Maybe he noticed something after the fact? But then, there’s the envelope. Could it be a resignation? Is he quitting? Or is it some other important intel?

“Do you want to go somewhere else?” Riza questions, honey-hued eyes trained on the envelope. 

“No. Fuery did a recent check for bugs in the office, didn’t he?” That’s true. Higher command doesn’t exactly love Team Mustang, and there have been a handful of times where there’s been attempts to spy on them and their private conversations. Due to this, Fuery skims the office for recording devices at least once a week to ensure that they’re not being spied on. His last check was just before their trip down south, and Riza highly doubts that anything significant enough to earn them the suspicion of Fuhrer Bradley has happened in their short absence. “I… Don’t want any other personnel to overhear us, so we should stay here.”

“Spill,” Riza commands, eyes narrowing as she meets his. Falman all but shrivels up underneath her pointed gaze like Black Hayate would after eating out of the trashcan or relieving himself on the carpet before he was fully housetrained. “Now, Falman. We don’t have all day.” 

“A letter that I found last night in the colonel’s trash can when he asked me to shred papers for him,” Falman screws his eyes shut and jerks his hand out towards her, the envelope held tight within his fingers as Riza processes his words. 

A letter written by Colonel Mustang… That he threw away. That Riza doesn’t know about. The first emotion she feels is anger; at the fact that something important enough for Falman to meddle in is happening and she has no idea about it, at the fact that the colonel hasn’t told her. The second emotion she feels is concern; about what it is, about why Falman looks so concerned. And finally, the third emotion she feels is fear; of how Roy might feel if he found out about this. 

“Falman-” Riza starts, reaching out but hesitating enough that she can’t bring herself to take the letter from him. 

“I didn’t mean to snoop, really. I was just concerned. It was torn to pieces and I had this gut feeling that it wasn’t just a regular document,” Falman explains. “So… I reconstructed it because I thought it might be important to the team.”

“And?” Riza asks, eyebrows raised. 

“It is important.”

Vague. Too vague. All of the alarm bells in Riza’s head are ringing now. 

“And you think I should read it even though it’s something that the colonel clearly intended on keeping private from all of us?”

“I think,” Falman pushes the letter into her hands. He seems uncomfortable at the touch- not used to it, or socially anxious, perhaps- but he does it anyway, gently clasping Riza’s fingers around the envelope. “That you deserve to read it.”

Silently, Riza retreats to her desk with the envelope in hand. She pulls the letter, noting that it’s torn to shreds and has been very meticulously put back together with an ungodly amount of tape. As soon as she sees green ink, deep down, she knows it’s for her. Roy always fills out his work forms with solid black. 

‘To my lieutenant,

I don’t know how to say this out loud. I’m not very good at doing things like this. It’s hard for me to gather my feelings, let alone put them on paper, and the mere act of expressing myself correctly takes a lot of thought- at least, it does when it comes to you.

Despite the ten plus years that we’ve known each other, I still can’t seem to put my feelings into words effectively enough to convey how much you mean to me. I admire you. You’re invaluable to me. We both know that much, but it always seems to come out inadequately, as if there aren’t words powerful enough to get these feelings across. Maybe there aren’t. 

I am a very flawed man, and the amount of mistakes I make increases unendingly, but having you by my side is the furthest thing from a mistake. In fact, I’d argue it’s the best choice I’ve ever made. I may not express my love for you effectively enough, in our day to day, but I’ll be damned if I don’t try my hardest. 

You are the reason I get out of bed, that I do what I do, and that I live and breathe. You’re the only thing that holds me up and the only thing that tethers me to this cruel, beautiful world. Not a day goes by that I ever feel anything less than limitless affection and adoration for you. I wish that I could do more for you, that I could give you a happy, peaceful life. 

I do the best that I can but it may never be what I feel you deserve. I know I shouldn’t be doing this. Really, I think of you and doing things like this far more often than I should. I don’t even really deserve to be writing to you like this, do I? Despite that, I will never stop trying- to write something good enough for you or to be a man worthy of your affections.

I know this letter isn’t very concise or articulate, and that you’ll likely roll your eyes at it in the same way you do at the reports I write, but I needed you to know. 

I love you.

I’m sorry. 

-Colonel Mustang’

Riza’s eyes start to blur about halfway through the letter. She doesn’t let herself cry, instead setting the paper down on her desk and resting her elbows on the wooden surface so she can hold her head in her hands. The words feel like relief, but they’re painful, too. Why would he write this only to throw it away? They confirm everything she’s ever wanted- romantic feelings that she hasn’t ever admitted to anyone other than Rebecca Catalina, devotion that he’s never acknowledged reciprocating allowed- and yet, they’re terrifying, because he tore them up and threw them in the trash.

It’s not a prank. It’s not silly or humorous, not intended to mess with her. Roy isn’t that cruel. But it is an enigma. Because him loving her and him actually being ready to admit it are two separate issues. If he were fully confident in his decision to confess, he would’ve given her the letter, and there wouldn’t be so many scribbled out parts. 

Still… More than anything, the letter is a relief. At least she knows how he feels more than she did before she walked in. 

“Oh… Colonel,” Riza smiles something soft and picks the letter back up, hugging it close to her chest. But then, an awkward clearing of Falman’s throat reminds her that he’s there. She turns to him with a fiery blush taking over her cheeks, a million questions about his involvement running through his head. “Wait. Falman, why did you bring it to me instead of putting it back in the trash when you realized that it wasn’t work related?”

“As the main person in charge of intelligence on this team, it’s my job to keep tabs on everyone,” Falman smiles back, awkwardly scratching the back of his neck. “And all of the intelligence I’ve gathered on you and Colonel Mustang would suggest that this letter… Would make you happy, and that your response to it would make him very happy.”

“I see. You always have such wholesome intentions,” Riza says, stroking her fingertips over the words again and again to reassure herself that they’re real. Her heart is pounding in her chest, her body feels like it’s on fire from head to toe, and she can’t quite look Falman in the eye anymore. But she’s happy. “I won’t tell Colonel Mustang about what you did, even if it is a grievous privacy violation. I’ll pretend that I came back to the office before you had the chance to shred the papers, told you that I’d take over, and found it on my own. You’ll be covered.”

At that, Riza can feel the relief rolling off of Falman in palpable waves. He stares at Riza like he can’t quite believe that his meddling will go consequence free. Maybe he thought she’d shoot at him or something… It’s a surprisingly common misconception. 

“Really? You’d do that for me?”

“Yes. I doubt he’ll have much room to be mad at me once I give him my response to this letter, anyway,” Riza agrees, because honestly, she suspects that Falman’s involvement will be the last thing on either of their minds by the time she and Roy talk about it. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” Falman offers a curt nod, and then heads for the door.  “I’ll be back at seven.”

With that, Falman is gone.

Literally seconds later, Roy walks in. Not good. Riza had planned on formulating some sort of response, maybe even on writing him a confession letter of her own. But he’s already here, and she may as well get this over with. So, she turns to face the colonel, expecting him to appear stressed. 

Only, he looks entirely the same. Silky raven locks fluffed up with sea salt spray. Charcoal eyes sharp and sparkling with something mischievous. A smirk on his kissable lips. Perfectly pressed uniform on his body, white ignition gloves with red stitching covering his hands, dark combat boots on his feet.

But things aren’t the same. Especially when his eyes land on her where she’s sat at her desk, still holding the letter. She’s been caught red handed. At the same time Riza puts together the fact that they’ve both been showing up to work increasingly early as an excuse to spend more time with each other under the guise of duty for literal months, Roy shuts the door behind him and approaches her desk.

Roy’s face changes the moment that his eyes land on hers, charcoal burning into honey. It’s almost so subtle that Riza doesn’t detect the change, but she knows him, and now, she’s looking for the change. His smirk changes to a big, genuine smile. His eyes sparkle with genuine fondness. Admiration. His cheeks, normally so pale, are dusted a soft pink the closer he gets to her. 

“There’s my lieutenant. It’s good to finally have you back,” ‘My lieutenant’. He doesn’t even use her full title, First Lieutenant Hawkeye, because if their history and his letter are anything to go by, it’s apparent that she’s the only one he even thinks of as ‘lieutenant’ these days. She’s not just First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye, anyway. She’s his lieutenant. Roy’s lieutenant. He all but beams as he talks, not registering the letter in her hands at first- just registering Riza. His affections are so painfully obvious that she can’t believe she didn’t notice them before. “I know it was only a few days, but it felt like months without you here by my side.”

And he’s excited to see her, the excitement palpable and the restraint that it takes for him not to launch himself into her arms like a puppy waiting for the return of its master all too evident now. Riza opens her mouth to say something, moves her hands to put the letter away for now, but then, his gaze flickers down to where the letter is clutched tight within her fingers. 

His face changes again. Confusion. Alarm. Horror. Shock. Shame. The blush is much darker now, more of a deep crimson than a soft pink. His brow is drawn together tight, and his jaw is tense. Riza thinks she may have actually broken him for a moment because he physically freezes. But then, after what must be half a minute of them sitting there in painful silence, he takes a step back, followed by another, in the direction of the door. As if trying to run away from this. 

“Don’t you dare,” Riza stops him, standing up from her desk with the letter still in her grasp. 

Part of her expects Roy to ignore her and leave. He is the superior officer. But, he doesn’t. He just stands by the door with his arms hanging awkwardly at his side and allows Riza to march up to him until they’re so close that she can smell the sea salt spray in his hair, the aftershave on his face, and the cologne on his neck. 

“Alright, lieutenant,” He sighs, eyes following shut as if he’s bracing himself for something horrible. “Let me have it.”

It’s like he thinks she’s going to shoot him or something. Riza can’t help but roll her eyes. 

“You wrote this,” She says. It’s not accusatory, just a plain statement. Based on the way that Roy averts his gaze, she knows that whatever little doubt there might’ve been about the letter being written by him has now been entirely squashed. “For me.”

“I did,” Roy admits- which is a shock, because part of Riza expected him to try to charm or lie his way out of this.

“You didn’t want me to see it.”

At that, he lets out a sharp sigh and allows his eyes to fall shut. It seems he can’t bear to look at her as he crosses his arms over his chest. 

“I didn’t.”

“So, you tore it up and threw it in the trash to keep me from seeing it.” 

“I did.”

“Why did you write it if you planned to tear it up?”

At that, Roy opens his eyes and looks at her. Really looks at her to the point that Riza feels like she’s melting underneath his gaze. Her heart pounds so hard that she can hear it in her own ears and feel it hammering against her ribcage. What will he say? The possibilities run through Riza’s mind, filling her with an odd mixture of excitement and panic. 

“I didn’t think it was good enough,” The words are stated plainly, as if it should be obvious to her. “I didn’t think I was good enough.”

It hurts to hear. For a moment, Riza continues tearing into him, because of course the letter was good enough to be given to her- and of course he’s good enough for her. Then again, she hasn’t confessed for similar reasons, so it would be hypocritical. It’s not like the icy language she uses to reprimand subordinates will help Roy very much right now, anyway. The stress is clearly getting to him; it’s evident in the way that he keeps swallowing what Riza assumes are lumps of anxiety and looking over her face again and again in an attempt to tell what she’s thinking. 

“I thought it was good enough. I mean, it’s made my morning,” Riza whispers. She gently folds the letter and tucks it into the pocket of her uniform jacket before placing her hands on either side of his face. His eyes go wide, gaze flickering to where he can see her fingertips on the tops of his cheeks from his peripheral as if he can’t believe that this is actually happening. He’s stopped breathing, breath caught in his lungs, chest still and lips parted in silent surprise. “I think you’re good enough. I love you, too. I always have. You… I thought you would’ve figured it out by now, and I wish you would have told me.”

“Oh,” Roy says. He looks at her hands again, and then into her eyes. “You don’t have to say that because you feel as if-”

“I’m not,” Riza interjects, her tone much firmer now. The idea that she would lie to him about something like this is insane, and they both know deep down that there’s no way in hell. “Have you ever seen me lie to someone to spare their feelings?”

“Okay,” Roy pauses. His hands twitch, like he wants to move them but doesn’t feel like he can. Though she doesn’t know exactly what Roy wants to do, she offers him a nod; permission. After a moment, he raises his hands and places them on top of where Riza’s are still resting on her cheeks. Even through the ignition gloves, there’s warmth radiating from him that damn near makes Riza melt. “So you love me back.”

“I do.”

Finally, Roy starts to breathe as he should once more. The breaths are shaky at first, but slowly become steady with each second they stand there like that. The clock reads six fifteen. They don’t have much more time. Then again, Riza figures there’s a good chance they have the rest of their life to pick this back up now that they’ve actually talked about it. 

“And you’re actually happy about this?” Roy questions while anxiously running his gloved thumbs over her knuckles. 

“I am. At least, I am if you are.”

“I see,” Roy swallows again, and suddenly, he moves to pull Riza into his arms. It’s a tight, brief hug that he pulls back from to ask-  “Can I-”

Again, Riza doesn’t know exactly what Roy wants to do, but she does know that she trusts him. So, she gives him permission yet again. 

“Do whatever you want.”

With that, he’s cupping Riza’s face with his hands and kissing her- and suddenly, the letter in her pants' pocket doesn't feel quite as heavy as it did before.

[persona-confessions]

i try not to get too deeply involved with fandom and thus wouldnt touch discourse with a 50 foot pole. i do have my takes on it though. especially since naoto is one of my favorite characters. i gotta get it off my chest.

so basically: i think both extremes of the debate are kinda annoying, just bc man it really isn't that serious stop killing eachother over it. i personally don't like turning a blind eye to what canon tries to put down; my favorite thing to do is try to build off of the foundations it sets. that foundation for naoto is very strong, i'd say.

the problem with naoto's writing comes from a trend most social links in p4 have. they're all about seeking the truth, right? but in basically every case, "accepting the truth" is basically just accepting that "it is what it is" - resolving to play the cards life has given you instead of rushing into changing things.

this isn't necessarily a bad thing. with some stories it works very well. other social links do this a lot better, some of them fumble with it a bit. but with naoto specifically... it's just that applying that mindset to gender is kinda miserable.

if naoto was shown to derive joy from embracing her identity as a woman, i would say yeah, maybe that is good for her. but as persona 4 loves to do, it makes it the brunt of jokes, constantly showing how uncomfortable she is made by it. the only times i can remember her feeling empowered by it are a couple lines in her social link. so no, i do not think her being a woman brings her much joy.

but there is one line in their social link that sticks with me a lot, look at this:

"The title of "detective" became a burden to me… I thought I had no other aspects apart from detective self. But you and the others gave me a reason to be, as neither adult nor man… So, I… I was able to face myself as myself. Before the detective, before the child, before the woman. By spending time with you all, I change, day by day. It frightened me before… But now… With everyone… With you, I can proudly proclaim that I am myself. Nothing more, but nothing less."

this quote is so good. this is how i read it: naoto does not like labels defining him, at all. naoto wants to be seen as naoto first and foremost; not as a detective, or a woman, or a child, or even a man. he just wants to be himself.

the point i make with this is i think naoto's storyline is a big Fuck You to gender altogether. it can be seen as a critique of how much of an emphasis is put on gender everyday, on everything, when it really should not matter all that much. detectives should not need to be men to succeed because gender makes no difference at all.

naoto spent so long being labelled: boy detective, detective prince, just a child, just a girl, i think he would be sick of it altogether. whatever label you choose to apply to that doesn't matter very much.

...the age thing still holds, though. you probably shouldn't be a cop at 15 :P

.

[jumpywhumpywriter]

Did someone say SPIDERS? (funny short snippet)

Aaaaand it's officially my birthday today! Yay? (not sure how to feel about that bc I don't really have any irl friends to hang with so there's no party and not a lot of presents but oh well - at least I get to write instead with all my imaginary characters!)

Today I decided to post some fun scenes for my followers to enjoy - and this one features Shadow, the morally-gray antihero we all know and love, along with Thomas & one big spider. Shadow is such a badass here who makes a serious power move. She's such a mood.

Warnings: a metaphorical spider was harmed for the making of this snippet 😭

"ACK!" Thomas let out a startled yelp, dropping the books he'd been holding to leap away from the wall on his left.

Tanner was instantly on high alert, already walking in his direction to determine the cause of his sudden panic and determine if there was an active threat.

"What is it? Are you okay?"

"HUUUUUGE SPIDER!" Thomas squeaked, pointing a terrified finger at the wall. Because there, right at eye level, was a massive spider as big as a human hand. "Can you please kill it?!"

"Me? Why me? You kill it!" Tanner retorted. "I don't do spiders. Nope."

"Nonono I'm not getting anywhere near that thing. Nuh-uh." Thomas shook his head vehemently.

"Should we flip a coin?" Tanner suggested, pulling a penny from his pocket. "Heads and I deal with the spider, tails and it's your job?"

"That's a terrible idea!" Thomas barked, throwing his hands up. "I'm allergic to certain spider bites! I could die if it bites me!"

Tanner raised a skeptical eyebrow. But before he could respond something came whizzing out of nowhere, whistling past Thomas's head alarmingly close and thunking into the wall beyond him.

Thomas jerked back with a gasp, looking wide-eyed to where a throwing knife had obliterated the spider, pinning it to the wall.

He whirled around to find Shadow standing on the other side of the room, who shrugged casually.

"There. Problem solved," she said simply. "You're welcome. You both are idiots. What a wuss. It's literally a spider. A spider, and you’re acting like the world's ending. It's a wonder natural selection hasn't taken you out yet." Her white wings flared and folded neatly behind her back, and she walked off without another word, leaving Tanner and Thomas gaping after her.

"So, uh, who's going to deal with the dead spider?" Thomas whispered.

“Coin flip?”

“Coin flip.”

Masterlist

I'm cackling so hard re-reading this -- Shadow is definitely my favorite character of all time.

@scoundrelwithboba @lumpofsand @isikedmyself878 @iamheretohurt @fleur-a-whump

@ay5ksal @otterfrost @sausages-things @togzy

@starz8nk @redwinesupanover @whumpisgoodwhumpislife @theforeverdyingperson @whatwhump

@whump-till-ya-jump @cravesunconditionallove @whumpwritinglover222 @written-in-the-stars135 @neverthelass

@writing-with-olive

@silly-scroimblo-skrunkl (tagging you in this one because I think you'd get a good laugh out of it?)

[cityofmeliora]

Ok so I'm trying to get my friend into Ghost and she's letting me tell her about lore and each character and such. Already talked about Nihil and Seestor and now I'm onto the Papas. Are there any tidbits about personality or trivia I should talk about? I got into Ghost literally the day Copia announced his final show (poor timing what is my luck) So I never really got to experience Primo, Secondo, and Terzo (especially considering I was a only a child to teenager when those three were around).

my favorite things that give you a sense of their personalities-

Primo:

my notes on Primo’s characterization 💖

another absolutely insane Primo interview (THIS GUY IS FUCKING CRAZY LMAO)

Secondo:

Papaganda Episode 1 and Episode 2

“The confessions of a Nameless Ghoul” interview

Terzo:

notes / thoughts on Terzo’s characterization (Terzo is so disappointed and depressed and i love him)

the Terzo autism post ♾️

Terzo + children 🥰

Terzo lied about *not* being able to speak Swedish

sorry i've obviously made a lot more posts about one of them-

[fmajorenthusiast]

What would the Rocky Horror characters be like if they had to look after a baby? (The baby is a few months old)

OMG I LOVE IT SO MUCH THANK YOUUUU!!!! AAAAAAA THIS WAS SO HILARIOUS TO THINK ABOUT!!!! IM LAUGHING MY ASS OFFF!!!!

(Also side note: I love everybody's fankids so when I call everyone out for being bad w the baby here plz know that I think that theyre awesome parents if theyre your fankids!!! Ahhh I love this all so much!!!)

Frank: Frank should NOT be left near a baby! Frank would probably dance around with it in his arms and, in a graceful whirl, completely toss it across the room for fun whilst "dancing with it!" To upbeat classical music! Now, chucking it across the room is fully reason enough to not leave Frank alone with a baby, however it doesn't stop there!!! If Frank had to feed the kid, I feel like he'd cry about his hands getting dirty more than the baby did the entire visit! Also, if the baby cries, he's gonna get irritated at the sound and run away trying to get someone else to solve the problem because he cannot handle that!! That said, I do think that he would generally speaking enjoy the baby because the baby likes him!!! He'd enjoy making it laugh, (though he would admittedly get very pissed and storm away if the baby didn't laugh at his jokes!) He'd feel very proud to show it his way of life!!! I think that he'd give the baby makeovers and they'd both laugh and enjoy it!.... That being said, Frank will still very much chuck that child across a room so PLEASE do not let him touch the baby! It's really not worth it!!!

Brad: Oh this is 100% a glimpse into Brad's future of being terrified to be left alone with his own kids one day and he knows it!!! That said, the baby would be safe! Not the most looked after that it could be, but definitely safe! He'd probably just wind up carrying it around with him everywhere and talking to it normally! He'd explain his every day events SOOOO awkwardly to it and it'd be fucking HILARIOUS!!! He's perfectly fine doing this and even enjoys it up until something perfectly normal and expected happens! (The baby needs to be soothed/changed/fed/ etc!) And then he 100% calls Janet for help and she explains to him how to do literally everything! And he gets it done whilst being very terrified but being like "hey! I'm enjoying this!" Through all of that cluelessness!! Overall, the baby probably didn't super-love the visit because Brad doesn't really go out of his way to do too much, but they had a good time!!! Brad did manage to make them smile!! And it's great practice that Brad is definitely gonna need one day!!!!

Janet: EVERY! BABY'S! DREAM!!! Omg Janet would do PHENOMENAL with a baby!!! She would love a baby to look after so much!!! She would take the opportunity to revisit a lot of her favorite shows and picture books from the past and she'd make sure that she reads to the baby in a way that the baby will really love!!! She knows how to do "Here Comes the Airplane" well, too!!! She can also objectively soothe a crying baby in RECORD time!! She could probably beat a lot of kids parents to that!! This is as much of an opportunity for her as it is for the kid's parents to get the time off! She's having the time of her life! That kid would end it's visit fed, washed, entertained, played with, and smiling and laughing!!! Leave your babies with Janet, everyone!!! Janet loves babies and babies love her!!!!

Riff Raff: Overall, he's not fantastic with babies! (Not referring to you Riff in my AU you're a fantastic dad ily kiddo) He's functional, but there are definitely other factors! First and foremost, secondhand smoke! Riff is.... enough of an addict that a baby will not deter him! He's also gonna be drinking and doing other drugs on the job! He's pretty much gonna leave the little one alone until they start crying for something. Then he'll do the bare minimum like, rock the crib and that's pretty much it. If he talks to the kid it'll be something along the lines of "you'll learn how to cry on the inside one day" and that's about it! Part of me thinks that his self esteem makes him afraid of the baby! Like, should he really be around a baby? Either way, he doesn't have enough energy for it! He's pretty much just existing in the same room as it as much as possible until he frustratedly has to do something! And y'know what? He deals with Frank every single day so that makes perfect sense!

Magenta: Magenta... Oh God I love you Magenta but sometimes I think that you might enjoy it when the baby cries. I really do. I don't think you would torture it but I do think that you would poke it. The other alternative is that Magenta COMPLETELY forgets that she's supposed to be taking care of a baby!!! Like, that baby gets left alone for a VERY unfortunate amount of time in the crib and it is not what childcare is supposed to look like at ALL! Overall though, she won't let it die. She will objectively enjoy it when the baby cries, but she'll keep it alive if she remembers to! And I think that the crying will bring her back! Overall.... this is so fucking funny to imagine but she's the wrong person for the job!!! She's hilarious, though!!!

Columbia: Columbia almost does a good job with it! She really does!!! She'll talk to the baby, hold the baby, talk in a baby voice to the baby! But she will not child proof her space! And she doesn't really have any activities for a baby aside from peekaboo- which she's great at, but the baby could use toys and a book or two!!! She enjoys time spent with the baby!!! She'd enjoy a chance to play with Legos again, but at the same time she would, in doing so, completely forget that you're not supposed to let a baby near Legos until they're at LEAST a year and a half old!!! Overall, Columbia would be very pure of heart, but not too smart with a baby! If everything goes well, her and the baby like each other a lot though!! If she ever has her own baby, I feel like she'd learn and do better in that case!!!

Rocky: This is an interesting one! Rocky would be incredibly gentle with the baby and he'd love to watch it smile!!! He'd very much have a "it's a baby! :D" reaction!!! However, he can't do too much more than rock it and be gentle and sweet with it because Rocky, in every way but physical, is also a baby!!! He loves it when someone plays peekaboo with him!!! He's so sweet with the baby, and maybe but big emphasis on maybe he'll be able to feed and change it if you give him very specific instructions, but that's only in a pinch!!! He loves to play with the baby's toys, so they'd better be able to share!!! Primarily, it boils down to what you need from him! If the request is, "here hold this while I run out to the car for a second!" He's right on the job!!! Better than a lot of the other people on this list!!! But that is his maximum level of difficulty!!! Any more than that and he simply has no IDEA what to do!!! And who can blame him? He's a baby too!!!

Eddie: I'm gonna go ahead and call this a bad plan! Eddie is a chronic safety risk to himself due to recklessness! Let alone what that'd mean for a baby!!! This baby would have chronic smoke in its face and Eddie would struggle to even rock a baby in its crib! I feel like, unless it was his and Columbia's kid, in which case he'd be titling his next album "I Love You, Sweet Little Rockstar", he'd probably just speedwalk out of the room! Also, be careful for the baby's ears!!! Eddie will not stop playing that music for anything! And that baby's ears are not developed yet and are prone to being damaged!!! Eddie does not really know or believe this fact enough to care!!! So this is a hearing loss risk situation!!! But hey! At least the baby's getting some good tunes!!!

Doctor Scott: Now Scotty knows how to take care of a kid!!! Hell, he'd probably bring that kid to meetings with him and baby talk the kid in the process!!! He still has a lot of books ams toys that he keeps around from when Eddie was a kid on the offchance that he'll have a kid around that can use them!! He'd talk very calmly to the baby!!!! Whereas Janet may be a bit more fun-loving, he's playful but in a very "and now we calm the baby!" type way! Similarly to Janet's style however, he's very much gentle with that kiddo and would never yell at the baby!! He probably wouldn't go above and beyond but he'd definitely make that baby love him!!! Well, as much as a baby can grow to love a stranger in an amount of time! But nevertheless he's absolutely fantastic with a baby!!!

The Criminologist: He likes the baby, but he might have some work to do!!! If he's working, then he'll find some way to keep the baby entertained (putting on a show, probably!) And get to work next to the baby so if the baby cries, he can spring into action! He may also use the baby as a chance to rubber duck if he's struggling with a mystery! He'll be like, "How can this make sense? It'd only make sense if there was a.... secret entrance! Yes! There must be a secret entrance!" And that'd be the one time he gets super animated around the baby! Other than that, he'd probably talk normally to the baby! Which the baby wouldn't mind, he has such a nice voice!!! He'd enjoy the baby for a change of energy!!! He'd want to work, yes, but the rubber ducking proves that the baby can help with that!! And they do!!!

[grapemoon]

My vision..,.

[lakesbian]

@girlstare-too-close-to-the-sun 12h Oh yeah I see, as far as parts of the book that made me unintentionally uncomfortable arc 14 probably has the most. But as far as the writing, idk maybe my standards for how it fits together are lower because I'm such a fan of the individual pieces, but I don't think it was a bad decision to have him run away. Watching him put one foot in front of the other towards his self destructive grand finale, only for Jessie and Shirley to drag him kicking and screaming back from the edge was one of my favorite parts of the book. I think the time to stew makes it work, and I won't say it would've necessarily been bad if he stayed, but it would have been a hard balance to strike after the multiple emotional punches in 13.11. And if I'm being honest, it may be my toxic trait that I like the majority of twigs fights. Like pact I enjoy the first half's more but I still think it's pretty interesting up until the end. Could do with less random soldiers getting stabbed in the balls but I am a dorley hall fan so I can't complain too much

honestly i think your standards are just lower yeah. regarding him running away: i think it is correct that he needed some time to stew, and it is a natural outcome of the dramatic scene in the prior arc--it's why that arc ended with jessie telling him to go take a walk for a bit while she spoke w/ lillian. i do not think the stewing-time should have been turned into what it did--and then never received any character-interaction follow-up--for the many reasons i stated in the prior reblog. i think the stewing should have taken up a chapter or two at most, and involved actual introspection, and contributed to the character arc momentum of 13.11. like, im not reading a story for the Individual Scenes, id watch an episodic show or smth if i wanted that, im reading it For The Story.

also, i wouldn't really call it a "self-destructive grand finale," nor would i say that he was dragged back "kicking and screaming." again, for the reasons i discussed above, his actions in this arc feel entirely unearned/without impetus, so any lead-up to a 'grand finale' feels shallow & hollow of any real emotional resonance. it doesn't take much to snap him out of it, either--jessie just shows up, is like "sy, i'm sorry that i got mad you were homophobic to me. i should be grateful for just your friendship. stop faking having an alter so we can be friends again." and he's like . Oh ok. for all the time sy and jessie have spent together, and all the emotional tension & build-up we've had, it's frankly laughable as a "payoff."

also, frankly, sy is too old at this point in the book for it to be not insufferable to watch jessie & shirley having to chase him down and bail him out here. it's not sympathetic. it's not interesting. he already treated jamie like shit when he was a younger, more sympathetically uninformed child, he already went through some (at times quite self-indulgent/inconsiderate towards jessie) mental anguish over that, and he's supposed to have actually grown over the course of this serial about sylvester growing up.

but here, he treats jessie and shirley like shit, he runs away from having to engage with the reality of that, and then they bail him out--with jessie apologizing to him--and the narrative treats it as if this is an overall-positive development. the prior arc intentionally hammers in that sy has hurt lillian & jessie, but one arc of random action scenes later, we are expected to clap for the heartwarming development of sy's thoughtless misogynistic & homophobic tears being mopped up by the women around him. he's too old for this shit. it's not cute anymore. it's just insufferable to read. if the book was aware he's terrible, and was writing it this way on purpose, that would be a more respectable decision--but twig genuinely believes that sy is a charming rascal anti-hero, when he is in fact a grating misogynist who never fucking grows or changes.

and well. truthfully yes i think it's an Non-Discerning Taste moment to like twig's fight scenes. they are overly-detailed, slogging, take up too much space in the book, and just uh. overall theyre not very good i think. if you enjoy them thats good for your reading experience but i feel like theres gotta be better books out there in the fight scene department that could really knock your socks off if you ever found them. i do like when sy stabs people in the balls though i think it at least adds a bit of humor to the whole affair

something evil about twig is that one of sylvester's most endearing, redeeming traits is his complete and utter love for and obsession with his aborted twin evette, but the monkeys paw curls in on that and it becomes one of The Worst Bits Of The Book