#there have been submissions and i dont know what to do about them (yet)

[haveyoureadthisbook-poll]

Hi everyone! How do you feel about manga (not in general, but for this blog)?

Im kind of torn, bc ofc reading manga is reading and they are books. But also its a little different bc theyre often serialized and have so many volumes right? To me it would be weird to have a poll like "have you read issue 1 of 500 of manga xyz?" (I think the same about other comics like spider-man or something)

I guess the question is more: do you read manga and do you want to see it on the blog?

(There was a manga poll blog but its inactive i think :( )

[firemenenthusiast]

hi hi! I wanna say I love your writing and love that you’re on the Archie train rn - I do have a lil request so I know most people think Farleigh is like submissive but I would love one where he’s like super dominant and for smut he’s like basically leaves you crying from overstimulation and makes you come a lot but like in a fun way not necessarily toxic (which isn’t bad either but yeah) (((: idk I feel like he’s a switch and could be both dominant and submissive

oh my god dom!farleigh finally out ! thank you so so SO very much anon for being so patient with me and i am incredibly sorry for making you wait this long :’(

—“casual”

dom!farleigh x fem!reader

summary: there’s a reason why you should never talk about farleigh behind his back

warning: 18+, smut, pwp, unprotected sex, rough sex (dom!farleigh), brat tamer! farleigh, free use, degradation kink, farleigh and reader sounds like fuckbuddies, cunnilingus, slapping, name calling (slut & whore) (sorry) (not sorry), praise kink, petnames (baby, sweetheart & doll) oral fixation, face-fucking, mirror sex, cock-slapping, spitting, making out, overstimulation, blowjobs, dacryphilia, throat fucking, mating press, teabagging, facial, cum eating, creampie, cervix fucking, ruined orgasm, foul language, humiliation, aftercare, fluff at the end

a/n: i really hope this is okay with what you’ve imagined anon, as writing dom!farleigh is by far my hardest work yet. literally pondered on this piece for months. enjoy ! teehee <3 also keep reading, it gets better

“can you believe it ? like— im not even asking for much but he’s just so, ugh” the girl sitting over at the end of the couch complains. you’re sitting in a circle, well not quite a circle, but it’s a bunch of girls just lounging, sitting and talking about what’s currently bothering them. and this time, the topic is boyfriends. cliché, but they can really be a pain in the ass according to these girls. you’re not sure if you can relate, given that you do not have a boyfriend. but you do have farleigh, whatever you’re calling him. he’s never bothered to put a label on it, and certainly never bothered to ask you to be his girlfriend. “oh my god yes” you hear one of the girls agreeing, followed by the others nodding and grabbing at each others thighs

“what about you ? i mean, we certainly heard a lot about farleigh” one of the girls asks you, snickering at the end of her sentence. everyone around campus is familiar with how farleigh’s relationships never end peacefully. they always end with a series of drama that apparently everyone is tuned in on. it’s like a ‘what did farleigh do this time ?’ show, that airs every couple of months. the common hall massacre from farleigh’s last hook up is still being talked about till this day and it’s been like what, six months ? you don’t know why even after seeing those messy events where farleigh always looked like he couldn’t care less, you still ended up in his bed at the end of the very party where he first laid his eyes on you. i guess when thee farleigh start shows you even the slightest of interest, you have no other option but to give in. it’s like a once in a lifetime opportunity, and one must be strong enough to resist the temptation of getting with the tall, golden skinned brunette. you— ? you just don’t have it in you.

pursing your lips, you quietly force an awkward smile to yourself, practically eye rolling. ofcourse they would be interested. you shut your eyes for a moment before blinking to every eyes focusing on you. truth be told, you dont like talking about farleigh to people, especially to answer invasive questions like this. you already feel so insecure with whatever kind of relationship you have with farleigh, so having people try to peek into it puts you in a very uncomfortable position. “what about him ?” you raise your eyebrows with your question-response in a desperate attempt to push farleigh off the topic. “girl how’s your boyfriend ? is he great or…” one of the girls tease, flipping her hair over her shoulder, trying her best to provoke an answer from you, preferrably a piece of gossip that she could spread to her girlfriends at uni.

“he’s not my boyfriend” you let out quietly, head low, correcting their assumptions that it’s an established relationship, earning a swarm of mutter from throughout the group. some of them already exhanging knowing looks and giggling to each other. well isn’t this just humiliating. “how come ?” the blonde serves you with yet another question, tone obvious that she’s just mongering for gossip. the sudden light dust prickling at your eyeballs are being wiped away by a heavy blink from you. all these questions evoke a sudden rage from within. she’s right. yeah, how come ? how come you’ve been letting farleigh fuck you anytime he wants when he doesn’t ever bother to make you his girlfriend. you’ve realised a long ago that it’s unlikely that you’re gonna be a couple but everyone seems to think the two of you are exclusive by the way none of you have been caught fucking anyone else.

noticing your expression, she decides to spare you the humiliation and just move on to her next question even though the former hasn’t been answered. the situation is making you awfully quiet, and it’s not just because you barely knew any of these girls, you just thought sitting with them in this mild get-together at farleigh’s mansion might offer you some sort of entertainment. never have you thought that you’re the one who’s gonna be the entertainment. the thick buzz at the top of your head confuses you between the exhaustion of talking to obnoxious young adults invited tonight or the weariness of knowing that you’re just a toy to farleigh. at first you didn’t really care, but after a while the boy’s starting to grow on you. sometimes he does care, the way he always walk you back to your dorm after a long night of doing your activities. but most of the times you tell yourself that it’s just common courtesy, and he could be doing that to any girl he wants.

“ah fuck that, how’s the sex ?” was her other question, which was followed by daunting whoops of teasings from the girls. still, every pair of eyes is set on you and it’s gotta be on the top list of your most uncomfortable situation. however the unusual bitterness towards farleigh at the moment gags your desire to shit talk about him to these girls. as you search for something bad to say, you realise that you don’t have anything to complain. guess you’d just have to lie then. straightening your shoulders and throwing your neck back, you lean your back on your propped up arms against the floor.

“have you ever heard that he’s good in bed from anyone ?” you start, which earns eager head shakes from the girls.

“well that’s because he fucking sucks. cums too fast, and guess what ? you’d think he’d atleast bother to make the girl-“ you gesture to yourself, “-cum first, but that’s none of his business it seems” the small piece of information being sought out to the public like that leaves the girls wide-eyed, with some of them dramatically placing their palms against their chest. you feel horrible for lying, and it just registered in your head that this will go terribly wrong knowing that it’ll spread around like an infection. “oh my god. really ?” the blonde attempts to fuel to the fire mid-burning the whole place down, her blue eyes almost popping out of her head, gouging for more info from you.

nodding, you catch yourself feeding her with yet another lie. “fucking sloppy, is what he is. moans like a bitch too. i should’ve been fucking his cousin by now, which, i don’t even know why i haven’t” the last part of this whole unbased shit talk feels too much for you, as you mentally wince at how untrue just all the things you said. the whole room is filled with various sounds of gasping, giggling and overall indefinable mutters. if you were being honest, you’re still not going to tell them how you’re willing to beg for his cock, telling him to make you his cum dump, as long as you get to be fucked by him. you raise your head to examine each of their faces, subtly biting on your bottom lips at their reactions.

it was a small get-together afterall, so you wouldn’t be suprised that some of the hallways in the house are ominously empty at this hour. you could still hear a distinct chatter and music from behind the other walls but as you briskly walk towards the left wing of the mansion, your wrist is suddenly being grabbed from behind, before your whole body is being caged against the wooden wainscot on the wall, pair of huge palms snaking themselves across your forearms. “farleigh—“ you huff out, neck craned to give access to the pair of lips trailing hot, wet kisses across your skin. the tall figure caging and pressing against your body is making you whimper out a small moan, to which he lets out a chuckle. you always make it so easy for him.

wrapping his fingers around your wrist in a firm grab, he brings them above your head before moving his lips towards your soft ones, a string of saliva shining on the flesh with each breath the both of you are taking. his touches grazes your skin delicately, dragging you into becoming an addict. you suck in a deep breath through your nose as you return the kiss, tongue darting to lick on his bottom ones, earning a smile from him. “i’ve missed you” he teases, while running his fingertips along your waistband, knowing the two of you only parted ways when his friendgroup approached him, which later lead you to the wrongful confessions with the girls earlier. words like these makes you long for his affection, spending your sleepless nights thinking about the feelings you may or may not have caught for him. he huffs out against your face, forehead resting against each other as you feel his hot breath on your skin. he leans down to chase your lips for yet another kiss, your noses nudging against each other only for him to hover over your lips with a teasing grin, making you grow desperate from the phantom kiss.

his large hands rest on the curve of your waist when you push him back by his broad chest, both your fingers sprawled over the fabric of his linen. he’s ridiculously good at maintaining his balance all while being pushed back with his head leaning down, still kissing you, his pretty curls grazing the skin on your cheeks. he’s so pretty, the type of pretty that makes you want to look at him all day, the type of pretty that you’d fall for. the way he kisses you could make anyone believe that he’s in love, yet he never cared to let you know, or tell you that this is just a fling for him. you already know where this is going, as you were on your way to find him in his room anyways. you let out a small giggle when he almost toppled back over a bump on the carpet, before he joins you with a low chuckle against your lips.

“c’mon, farleigh—“ whining, you’re half begging for him to just pick you up and carry you to his bed, which, like he could read you mind, he does. “i know, baby”. you’re clinging onto him with your legs wrapped around his waist, your hands cupping his face to deepen the kiss as you feel the growing bulge poking at your thighs. humming into the kiss, he pulls away momentarily to lean you against the wooden door of his room, turning the both of you to hold you against the door, forcing it to shut, all while his tongue licks your taste off yours.

you could feel his desperation grow from his kiss as your fingers work eagerly unbuttoning his shirt. he fumbles with the back of your dress, reaching to undo the string, heavy pants escaping both your lips, practically clawing at each other. after peeling the linen off his shoulder and pulling it down to throw it on the floor, you watch him move recklessly. “fucking get this off” he groans, as you reach to the back to help him. everything is moving so fast, and you glad it does as it seems to be impossible to remain patient with each of farleigh’s touch against your skin. it’s like a craving, an addiction, as desperation fills the thick air inside the room more then the hot breath puffing from your lips.

as soon as you’re left only with the matching set of underwear, farleigh wastes no time picking you back up to throw you on the bed, his body flush against yours as his kisses down your body are starting to get wet. between his fingers raking around your waist and his mouth sucking on the skin of your collarbone leaving wet bruises all across it, you feel yourself getting lost in the haziness, unable to mutter a single coherent sentence. all that could be let out past your lips are whines and moans, as your fingertips graze against his scalp, pulling at the root of his curls. you feel helpless, exposed and needy for him and only him, to do something. once you feel his lips kissing dangerously close to your cunt, sucking and licking especially hard on the flesh of your inner thighs, you find yourself reaching for his face. “farleigh please,,” you let out pleas after pleas, begging for his lips to be where you need him the most. paying no mind to you, he continues placing his marks across your inner thigh and the spot closest to the hem of your panties with his palms smoothing over the skin on your torso.

he’s humming in between kisses, his eyes rips themselves from focusing on marking your skin to look directly into yours, maintaining eye contact. if it wasn’t for the growing bulge in his pants, he’d be willing to spend the rest of his time just looking into your eyes. tilting his head down, he pushes the crotch of your panties to the side, breaking eye contact for a moment to look at the dripping mess in front of him, grinning at how soaked your folds are, making your eyebrows knit. the way your pussy glisten with your wetness gotta be one of his favourite views ever. feeling the ache down your core starts to throb, you can’t help the pitchy moan slipping past your lips and the sudden bucking of your hips into his face. “don’t make me beg farleigh, please” the words coming out of your mouth contradicting each other. before you could add to your complaints, you feel his swollen lips smashing against your folds, his tongue hot, licking away all the wetness collecting and dripping towards your hole. he has one hand holding you down by your waist, and another rubbing on your pussy, spreading the folds apart so his tongue could have better access. the fingers on your pussy roam down to your hole, pushing your clit upwards so he could settle his whole face in between your thighs, his nose repeatedly nudging against your clit. driving his face into your pussy, it’s like he’s stuffing his face with your essence, eager to lick away every drop of wetness dripping down your folds as he feels like nothing tastes better. he hums, sending vibrations through the sensitive nerves, fishing out another whine from you.

“gonna cum, farleigh. please make me cum” the words come out of your mouth like water, without you even having time to think it before. as the knot in your lower stomach begins to get tighter with each sucking of his lips on your folds, he knows you’re seconds away from cumming. you could feel the wave of pleasure threatening to wash down over you, as you’re willing to give up everything to chase after it, even your dignity. shutting your eyes, your fingers harshly grab at the sheets beneath you, as farleigh suddenly rips his mouth away from your pussy, moving over to stand at the edge of the bed, his eyes busy eyeing his hands that are unbuckling his belt. “what the fuck—?!” you almost yelled, anger and dissatisfaction tearing through your voice as you look at farleigh in disbelief. the orgasm that you were chasing is washing away, leaving your pussy feeling so raw and swollen.

he throws you an unbothered look with an eyebrow quirked, his lips shiny from eating you out. “sorry, apparently i’m just not bothered to let the girl cum first” the coy expression on his face obvious, the slight curl at the side of his lips quickly being stripped away. “—isn’t that right ?” he continues, leaning over with his knee dipping into the mattress, his propped arm settling beside your temple, his face inches away from your muted one. the furrowed eyebrows that were accompanying your anger dropped down, as your glossy eyes now being forced to look into his intimidating ones. you could feel that he’s not happy, but none of his expressions tell that, except that you’re fucked.

you hear him let out a chuckle as he leans back, both his knees on either side of your body, resting his weight on your torso. “you should see the look on your face sweetheart” he tsks, shaking his head at you heavy breathing, still affected by the orgasm that he just ripped off from your core. no words could be lolled out of your tongue and you could only shake your head as an attempt to save yourself. he cocks his head to the side before his eyes widen,

“no, i mean it”

moving his knee over your body, farleigh moves to the side of the bed before reaching over to cup the back of your neck, pulling you up to push you off the bed by your neck, forcing you to sit infront of the body sized mirror by his nightstand. you’re kneeling, your hands are forced to prop yourself up from face planting on the hard floor, ass is sticking out on full display giving him the perfect view. oh how he loves when you’re exposed like this for him and no one else.

before you could even react to being pulled off the bed, his fingers already curl themselves across your skin, wrapped around your neck, pulling you upstraight so you could only look at your reflection in the mirror, and his smug face while he crouches down. “look at yourself, such a pretty face-“ he starts, fingers moving to push your cheeks together, his arms pressing down your chest so you’re resting against his shoulder.

“-but so. fucking. dumb.” he says, tapping roughly on your cheek after each words.

the last part of his sentence heavy, emphasizing on how stupid you are that you couldn’t even think before going off telling people such lies. “you know what i love to do with a pretty face that doesn’t know when to shut up ?” he trails off, letting go off your face to continue unbuckling his belt, the metal of the buckle clinking, before unbuttoning and pulling the zipper down.

“as if you know when to shut up” you spit out, trying to retaliate against his words.

he offers you an amused look before shaking his head and smile. “i love when you prove me right“ farleigh chuckles as he looks up to meet your eyes in the mirror, before pulling down his pants, along with his boxers, making his now fully hard length that was straining in his pants spring up, hitting the trail of hair on his lower belly. no matter how many times you’ve seen and been fucked by him, you still think he’s huge. he’s perfectly girthy, his tip always flushes a deep shade of pink and his cock’s just as pretty as him.

he steps closer towards you, reaching down to gather your hair in a makeshift ponytail before pulling you up, forcing you to stand on your knees. he looks at you with that grin you could never crack the meaning of, as you watch his other hand move to grab the base of his cock. his firm grip pulling at your scalp leaves you quiet, as you could only glance between his face, and the leaking cock in his hand. with your head in his one hand and his heavy length in the other, your eyes are on the same level of his waist where you could hear the loud sound of him spitting into his hand, as it lands on his length. the lewd, loud squelching sound of him stroking saliva all over his cock right beside your face makes you clench around nothing

sighing, he pulls your face towards his crotch before starting to slap his hard cock against your cheek. you’re starting to feel degraded to a mere sextoy with the way he’s smearing his cock all over your face, the sensitive tip tapping at your swollen lips. his long digits wrapped around the base serves a great purpose of aiming his slick length so it slaps heavy against your face, bouncing against the skin again and again, omitting loud slapping sounds. “i don’t even know what i’ve ever done to you-“ he starts, tongue poking the inside of his cheek.

“-but you don’t talk about me that way, baby”

he stops the slapping of his cock to wipe it all over your face instead, repeatedly moving his shaft over your nose as it makes him groan in pleasure. your pretty face is covered with the slick of saliva and precum, you hair a mess and sticking all over your face. as soon as he finishes his sentence, your entire reflection on the mirror is being blocked by his legs stepping in front of you, so he could roughly shove his hard cock past your lips, pushing it down your throat. the sudden pressure at the back of your tongue makes you gag, as tears start forming on your waterline. you’re starting to regret the things you said just for the one minute of validation. farleigh has never done anything like this to you, but you know this is not going to end anytime soon.

“shh…shh- it’s okay, im just gonna fuck this mouth slow and nice. is that good ?” he coos, his hips begins thrusting into your mouth, starting nice and slow before quickly changing to a rapid pace in a split second, not allowing you to adjust at all. he’s now properly fucking your mouth, and if you didn’t already feel like a cocksleeve, you certainly do now.

“there you go, you’ve always been so good at sucking my cock. you’re a proper slut you know that ?” he mutters through gritted teeth, both his large hands cradling your head, slamming your face down his cock, heavy balls slapping against your slicked chin from all the drool dripping down your lips. looking up at him, you try to blink away the glossiness of your eyes as you give him an obeying look, seeking for his approval. “oh that’s cute, you’re my little slut aren’t you ?” the whiny moans you’re letting out sends vibrations, further stimulating his cock. “aww mouth too full of cock you can’t even answer” giving you a fake pout on his lips, he pulls out for a moment to let you answer, yet you’re keeping your mouth shut. “i said-“ he yanks your hair as he leans down close to your face, “-you’re my little slut aren’t you ?” you almost topple back before nodding vigorously,

“yes, yes—“

“yes what ?”

“yes i am, farleigh”

your quick response earns a satisfied grin from him before your mouth is back to being stuffed by his hard cock. you try your best not to gag too hard on his length as you know farleigh wouldn’t appreciate that. even with him treating you like you’re worthless, you’re still eager to please him. maybe you are indeed a slut. his slut.

the rapid movements of your head bobbing down his shaft and his hips thrusting into your mouth makes your hands roam up his thighs for leverage, as you look up at him through your lashes. he thinks you look so cute like this, so he offers you a smile from above, the tip of your nose hitting into his lower belly repeatedly. you could feel his thrust getting even faster before one last throw of his head and he’s pushing your mouth off his cock, messy strings of saliva connecting from your lips to his swollen tip, his balls dripping with sticky translucent substance that you couldn’t even tell. could be drool, or precum, or a mixture of both of your fluids. his cock is now resting against his navel, as it bounces with every move farleigh makes. he’s now pulling you up by your arms, the state of you so pathetic that if it were to be described, you’re nothing short of fucked and cockdrunk.

“c’mon sweetheart, hands and knees. need to fuck your pussy” his instructions loud and clear, as your body is being thrown like a doll onto the mattress. and like it’s instinct you immediately crawl onto the bed and prop your ass up, your legs apart, back arching with your face dropped down between the sheets. “i know you’re a good girl” he smiles, hands roaming across the smooth skin of your ass before swiftly pulling down your panties, revealing your soaking wet puffy lips, practically begging to be fucked. “well that’s a sight felix is certainly missing out on” the sight before him makes his cock twitch, a drop of precum forming at the tip before he catches it in his fingers to spread it along his length. getting onto the mattress, his pants already discarded and pooling beside the bed.

he crawls over you to rub his length against your folds, collecting the wetness that’s practically drenching his cock, before thrusting into your hole without warning. a cracked loud moan from your lips grazes both your ears as you give up against the sheets, your sobs being muffled by the soft fabric underneath you. he’s not in the mood of making you feel good as he’s only focused on fucking the dumb out of you and letting his anger out. he’s making you take his cock like a good girl he knows you are, as you struggle to adjust to the stretch of his size. he’s angry, well more like irritated, when he walked by the living room looking for you, only to hear you talking shit about him, and telling pathetic lies with no substance. there hasn’t been one fuck where farleigh doesn’t make you cum first, and he certainly fucks you like nobody else. so when you went off feeding those plastic blondes fake gossip just to appeal to them, of course he’s mad.

his large chest is now pushing down against your back, his large hand found it’s way at the back of your neck, holding your head down that your face is being mushed against the sheets. his harsh thrusts push your body back and forth, your face pressed down so hard to the point that the only sound you could let out are heavy cries and sobs, incoherent mumbles of pleads of his name as you’re being brought to your orgasm while he’s still rapidly fucking into you. “farleigh— mngh,, ohmygod“ in a way you sound like you’re worshipping him, while he’s ball deep inside your cunt, the tip of his cock bruising your cervix.

normally he would help you chase your high down but he doesn’t care. “i’ve never made you cum huh ? you can cum all you want now baby” his words are starting to get to you, as your pussy’s starting to feel so raw. another wave of orgasm come crashing down, leaving you a lightheaded babbling mess. you’re now actually crying for him, tears streaming down your face, shoulders bobbing, as both tears and drool wet the sheets underneath. “no more,, please. s’too much” you manage to let out weakly, your fingers gripping at the poor fabric desperately. suddenly you feel like he’s grown much larger than he usually does.

looking at your fucked up state, he let out a chuckle. “but i thought you wanted this ?” he mocks, he knows that you’re just too fucked up to even make up your mind. you feel so stretched out by his girth, and the position grants him the perfect access to fully fuck his cock into your pussy, thrusting forward in a rough rapid pace into the mattress. “you think felix could fuck you like this ?” he groans, making you shake your head desperately almost like you’re being hypnotised. “n-no,,no- hm“ you let out in response, your voice bumpy from his thrusts that are making your whole body shake. the whole situation is feeding the primal urge in him, as he grunts while biting down the skin at the back of your neck, his hand grabbing at your hair, pulling your head back to lift your face off the drool-drenched sheets. his other hand is holding you close by your stomach, lowering his hand to feel the moving bulge on your lower belly.

“feel that ? that’s my cock- so… fucking deep inside you. so maybe next time you wanna talk shit, fuck-“ he half whispers into your ear through gritted teeth, as his thrusts are starting to falter. both your hot cheeks are being pressed together as he talks right into your ear. “-remember how pathetic you look right now” he finishes off his sentence with one hard thrust, his hot body pressing down against yours before warm sticky substance fills up your hole, drops of it threatening to spill from the brim. you feel his chest resting on your back, he’s catching his breath as he pants into your ear with his hand wrapped around your neck.

“oh fuck,,” he lets out, voice thick with his remaining pants as he watch the cum oozing out of your cunt when he pull his softening cock out. he’s leaning back on his heels, admiring his work, ropes of white leaking down your puffy swollen lips, a low groan escapes his lips when he notices your hole clenching around nothing, pushing out more of his cum. smiling, he reaches over to squeeze your thigh, grabbing at the soft flesh. “such a filthy whore, letting me use this pussy like a toy” he lets out, his words making you feel so dirty. “aren’t you, baby ?” he coos, running his fingers across your chin. letting out a huge content sigh before hearing you mumble out a string out words. “what’s that, hm ?” leaning down, he moves closer to your lolled out face to hear you.

“you came too quick” you struggled to let out those words, yet still determined to try and piss him off.

raising his eyebrows, he seems surprised by your little protest before you feel his fingers slowly smooth over your hair, petting your head.

“i know. and that’s your job to get me hard again”

hearing his words, instant remorse washing over you as you feel him flip you over, that you’re now lying on your back, facing him. he looks even bigger, shoulders broad and glistening in sweat, making you feel like he could cage you in any moment now. his cheeks look flushed and red, his lips pink and swollen yet he never looked prettier. your hands immediately move up to hold onto his thighs, now being on either side of your upper body as his cock is hanging right in front of your face. the remainder of his cum that is clinging onto his tip drips down, landing onto your lips before his fingers push your cheeks open, shoving his cock into your mouth as he tries to fit the whole length inside.

his limp cock feels odd on your tongue at first, but you immediately start sucking on his length. “come on, doll” he urges you, eager to be able to fuck you again. you mentally flinch at the name he’s calling you, as it really makes you feel filthy. deep down you absolutely love filling your mouth full, and sucking on his cock. anything to please farleigh. he’s thrusting his hips down to your face, circling it so now it’s his balls turn to be shoved into your mouth, before being absolutely slobbered with saliva. in no time he’s getting hard again, making it easier for him to fuck into your mouth, only to pull it out and replace it with his balls again, and doing so repeatedly until he feels just. you have your eyes closed, your lips busy fondling and kissing at each of his sack, your tongue covering them with drool.

farleigh is holding onto the headboard, grunts spilling from his mouth from how good you’re worshipping his cock. as he tilt his head down, he can’t help the moan slipping past his lips at you sucking at the underside of his balls. now that he’s fully hard again, he reaches down to grab at the base of his shaft before putting the entire heavy weight of it onto your face, rubbing his length all over your soft skin, like he did earlier.

too weak to form coherent sentences to him, you manage to drag out a mumbled “please…farleigh”. you hear him let out a satisfied hum as you close your eyes, letting the feeling of his wet cock sliding on your face takes control. the length of his cock almost covering your face as he’s contemplating just fucking his cock against the skin of your face into nothing. everything’s just so wet now, his sweaty body against yours, your face warm and sticky with sweat, tears and his cum, with his balls dripping with your drool. you’re too cockdrunk to even protest, letting him use you like a cum rag, wiping the cum off his cock on your skin, your pussy throbbing from another orgasm you just had undone just from how lewd this is.

“you make such a good whore, y’know ? im gonna need to fuck your pussy again” almost immediately after saying that, he’s lifting your upper body up, making you sit while he moves behind you to let your frail body rest against his. “let me have one last fuck okay ?” he whispers into your ear, your eyelids heavy as you slowly nod. his fingers tap at your thigh, signalling you to raise your hips. he has one arm wrapped around you, pulling you up onto his lap as you feel the tip of his hard cock slip back into your cunt with the guide of his other hand. you’re now sitting on his lap, legs bent and all spread out to give access to him. he could feel the stickiness of his cum left inside you engulfing his length, that is reaching deeper, bumping into your cervix. ”fuck, could feel my cum inside you—” the stretch of his cock against your wall is squeezing his cum back out of your hole as low moans escape both of your lips. he begins thrusting at a continued pace, much like before, making your body bounce on his lap. you let out a high pitched moan, your folds still swollen as you mumble out “m’too much farleigh- no more,, please” he ignores your whines and moans, fucking up into you like he’s been starved of it.

he reaches up to grope your tits, that have fallen out of your bra when he was ramming into you earlier. this is the first time tonight that farleigh’s even bothered to touch your nipples as he normally would’ve been too attached to sucking on your mounds by now. the lack of attention to your hard nipples got them too sensitive as you feel like screaming when farleigh tweaks one of them in between his fingers. he’s cupping one of your tits in his large hand while the other one bounces hard with each of his rapid thrusts up your sensitive walls. the sound of your ass slapping against his thighs fills the room as you start to feel your maybe 5th orgasm coming, having lost count- as his thrusts suddenly stop. “nooo,, no- please don’t make me” you start whining at the sudden stop of his movements, shaking your head helplessly to try to get him to change his mind. you know this move so well, he always make you do it when you’re on his lap.

he’s gonna make you fuck yourself on his cock.

“you know the drill pretty girl” his voice firm, not leaving any space for your antics. your head resting against his shoulder feels too heavy to be lifted off, but that’s just you being a brat. you show no signs of moving, with your arms flailing weakly in his embrace. you hear him let out a sigh before being followed by a low groan, lifting you off his lap and flipping you over. you’re now sprawled open in front of him, cold air grazing across your pussy makes you shiver. he pushes his weight down against your thighs with his hands, putting you in a mating press. all you got to do was let out a gasp before a harsh slap from his large hand stings across your face. “i gave you plenty of chances-” he lets out as you feel another slap lands on your cheek

“-but you never seem to appreciate them”

another slap. and another.

you’re moaning, enjoying being treated so harshly by him. as your tears stained cheeks turn red and a new stream of tears are threatening to spill, you try begging for mercy with a weak attempt, “mmh- please, farleigh,,”. your final whiny plea is immediately being cut short by another slap, this one stings especially hard, making you think that he hates you. he’s now grabbing at the flesh at the back of your thighs, fully pressing your thighs against your tits, before his hips start thrusting into your pussy again. wet, squelching sound bouncing off the walls as your wetness start splattering all over the sheets. the shame and humiliation makes you start sobbing again, your breathing heavy as you struggle to take his cock that’s protruding against your walls.

he notices your heavy breathing, yet he has no intentions of slowing down. “you’re breathing like you’re doing all the work, fuck— “ you hear him say. his thrusts after doesn’t last long before he immediately pulls out, his hand quickly reaching down to continue the pressure on his cock. “oh fuck. fuck, fuck—“, strings of curses leave his mouth. stroking his shaft with a tight fist, his pace rapid, desperate and sloppy before his hips begin to fuck into his fist, his balls slapping against his knuckles. “fffuck, fuck yes-” staggering moans spill out of his mouth, making him look pathetic. his voice almost cracks before he’s moving up your body, his hand still pumping his cock rapidly before he’s cumming, spurting warm seed all over your pretty face. it’s not as much as before, but your face’s still covered by his cum, your tongue licking away the drops landing on your lips. you hear him let out a deep sigh, heavy panting before collapsing onto your body.

inspecting his actions closely, your mind still hazy, your face messy with tear stained cheeks, with some still clinging onto your lashes. farleigh had wiped the remnants of his cum off your face, it was the first thing he did after coming back with a bowl of warm fresh water and a piece of cloth. he’s already dressed in his comfy clothes, carefully cleaning your skin with the warm soft cloth. he’s meticulous, like he always is with everything. you look to the side to see a glass of water and a mini chocolate bar that he’d fetched when he left the room which to be honest, you thought he was gonna leave you, all alone and still fragile. looking out the window, the sky’s already starting to gain its light as it’s starting to look a lighter shade of blue. he’s quiet, eyes focused as only his fingers are moving carefully, cleaning off every inch of your body. just as he makes sure you’re all clean and comfortable, you’re surprised when he crawls up closely beside you, snuggling down as he reaches for the soft comforter to wrap the both of you underneath it.

“i thought you were gonna leave”

“not gonna leave my girlfriend alone”

the name hits you like a boulder making you perk up, eyebrows knitted as you realised that you were never his girlfriend. you turn to face him who’s already near dozing off,

“please go to sleep” he mutters out his last words before dozing off for real, pulling you closer into his arms.

taglist: @r4vn @love-me-pls @radioloom @farleighlover @imjustheretoreadsmuthaha @luckystrikerealness @juniperhasfallen @themoonchildwhofell @khxna @fuckshitslover @szapizzapanda @inglourious-imagines

dividers by: @rookthornesartistry

[chaithetics]

Hello!!! Hope ur doing well <3

I looooved the way u wrote Matt n I wanted to ask if u could do a nsfw alphabet about him? But I also noticed on ur masterlist u havent written one yet and if u dont want to thats fine :>

Matt Murdock NSFW Alphabet

Hello lovely Nonnie! Thank you for sending this through, this was a nice, quick and fun piece to do so thanks for sending it through. Happy to do nsfw nbcs, I just never have had a request for one before. It's obviously my first time, so I hope you enjoy! Do let me know what you think! :)

Warnings: 18+ MDNI!!!, smutty smut smut I guess? Not proof or beta read!

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

This man lives for aftercare. Matt Murdock is without a doubt, absolutely obsessed with physical touch and indulging in it after the act as a form of aftercare, no matter the type of sex you just had, oral or penetrative. He’s obsessed with your body and how your skin feels against his and how your skin feels when he runs his fingertips over goosebumps, scars, moles, stretch marks, all of your curves and muscles. He likes to be clean but even if he’s sweaty he still likes to cuddle you, he needs to feel your skin against his, to press his head into your neck to tickle your sensitive skin and to deeply inhale your scent. He’s attentive to any needs you have, he smiles as he listens to your heart steadily beating and relaxing from that high, and he’s extremely affectionate. If you have hair he’ll be playing with it however he knows that you like and if not, he’ll be caressing your face gently as well while you cuddle. 

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favourite body part of a partner’s is their mouth/lips. He loves the way that his partner’s mouth feels against his, how soft it is to kiss, the shape of your lips and tracing them with his fingertips, how he can feel your lips move and it affects the rest of your face when you smile and laugh, how your mouth is where your gorgeous laugh comes from, your voice, and also the moans he loves to hear from you. 

His favourite body part of his, is his hands. He loves physical touch and his hands allow him to indulge in that sense by being affectionate and being able to touch your body all over. He can caress you with his hands, feel the goosebumps along your bare skin when you strip down, he can feel how you clench around his digits when he’s inside of you. His hands are the perfect way for him to indulge in you. 

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He’s a Catholic… He’d use the preferred protection methods of his partners but he has no issue with cum. I don’t know if this is a controversial take, but Matt Murdock is certainly into cumplay… 

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He wants to explore his submissive side more, he likes the slight feeling of dominance with a partner who bites him, he likes his neck being bitten. He either hasn’t tried pegging but really wants to be pegged, or he’s been pegged and really loves it but it takes him a little while to work up to feeling comfortable communicating that. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

To absolutely nobody’s surprise, Matt is extremely experienced. He has a playful charm that makes everyone in a five-block radius swoon. As Foggy has pointed out over and over again, he’s an absolute magnet for beautiful people of all shapes, sizes, and colours, and people absolutely fall for his handsome, tortured soul energy that he brings to everything. He certainly didn’t shy away from the attention in college he got for his looks and charm, one of the only ‘sins’ he didn’t feel the need to repent for in his college years. Foggy’s jokes have been longstanding in Matt’s life. He’s an experienced icon, he knows what he likes now and he knows how to please. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Matt’s favourite position is positions of cuddle and spooning sex. He loves the intimacy of becoming one and being as physically close to each other as possible, the position is sensual and intimate and he loves being able to press right up against you, your buddies wrap around each other and having his face pressed so closely to you. He can feel everything about you with all of his senses in the most overwhelming and amazing way. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Matt is a more serious lover, there’s gentle caresses and words spoken that are filled with love and need. Sometimes, in a slightly more cockier mood he may be a little less serious and have that devilish grin on his face and make a couple of more teasing comments and witty remarks to spice things up while he’s bringing you to release, but generally he’s more serious when you two are together during sex. 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) 

Matt likes to be well-groomed in general and that applies to all of him including downstairs, he doesn’t necessarily like shaving down there but his preference is that he likes to keep things tidy and trimmed for himself. A view he’d never oppose on others and he’d never criticise or be put off by hair or a lack of.  

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

The intimacy is never lacking with Matt, he’s proud on his lovemaking abilities and he knows he’s an expert of the art of making partners swoon with his big brown eyes and charms. Matt is a passionate, sensual, lover who always makes sure you feels special and checks in on you in the sweetest, most genuine but also hot ways. He knows just how to romance you up and make the foreplay incredible with the goal of giving you as much pleasure as possible. He loves intimacy, there’s lots of affectionate touching, the sex often is in cuddling positions. His body moves in ways to reassure you of how much he yearns and worships you, his words are filled with love and passion during sex. He makes it intimate and filled with love. 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He doesn’t jack off very often. He prefers being intimate with others and he’s always had plenty of opportunities for mutual pleasure with others that he’s rarely felt the need to pleasure himself like that. He rarely does, and whenever he has he usually does it in the shower. He tries to focus on the feelings of pleasure and on the sound of the shower water running to drown out the rest of the overwhelming landscape of New York while he chases his high with swift strokes. But he prefers the feeling of someone else’s hands, fortunately, he has you now. And your hands are better than any feeling he could ever give himself. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Matt’s delved into and is pretty into bondage. He likes the feeling of the power dynamics, the gain and loss of power and control, how it feels on skin. He doesn’t mind who is who, he’s more than happy to be tied up for you and to surrender that type of control to you. He trusts you and wants to be used to give you as much pleasure as possible. But he’s also more than okay with being the one to tie you up and feel those materials against your skin and wear his signature smirk as he does. 

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Matt isn’t an exhibitionist and he’s not really into public or outdoors sex. He much prefers to keep sex in the privacy of his own home, the world is often overwhelming for him and there’s always a million things going on, in his little private corner that’s home, his partner can be just all his and it’s much easier for him to focus on and enjoy being with his partner. He loves the comfort and intimacy of keeping it in the bedroom, but Matt also loves the intimacy of spooning and cuddle sex on the couch. 

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Matt’s a giver, a pleaser, what gets him going is the mere idea of pleasuring you, he just wants to please you and give you the sweet, sweet, sweet release you deserve. It’s what turns him on and what gets him going, you always need to orgasm first, that’s his goal during intimacy and he tried to create an orgasm gap, one that’s in your favour. 

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He’s into bondage and we know that he has nothing against some light choking, but beyond that, he’s the type of man who still tries to be as good and respectful as possible. He wouldn’t be into more rough and violent sex or the more hardcore side of BDSM, he’d always be too scared to hurt his partners and the idea of inflicting intentional pain like that makes him very uncomfortable. 

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Matt is more than okay with receiving oral but there’s not doubt about it, he significantly prefers giving oral instead of receiving. As we’ve already clarified, he’s a giver. He wants to give you oral as much as you want him to, he’d happily spend his life buried in you, holding onto, gripping and caressing your thighs as he does. He’s obsessed with your taste, the way your body reacts as he’s pleasuring you and how he can sense everything going on with your hormones, pheromones, heartbeat, your breathing and then again as you orgasm. He loves to give oral and he’s absolutely skilled at it, he’s a king of it. He knows just how to use his mouth in the best possible way that makes you feel so good and gets you in your favourite places. 

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

His pace and style is always sensual when he’s with you. He’s done faster paced sex and sex that’s been more rough but he loves slow, sensual lovemaking while he cuddles and buries himself deep into you with a perfect pace that makes it last and is the definition of sensual. 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) 

He likes to go all out with sex, for everyone involved to get their fair share of orgasms. Matt isn’t the biggest fan of his quickies but in angsty moments, he has been known to have a more angsty, potentially more rougher quickie than his usual slower and sensual lovemaking. It’s still filled with passion though. But he doesn’t do quickies often. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Matt’s definitely game to experiment and to communicate about it, listen to ideas with an open-mind and he’s curious in a charming way about things. He’s open to trying new positions, new toys, some different styles and dynamics. But he’s not into risks or experimentation that’s on the more moderate to extreme side of the spectrum. He’s not an exhibitionist type so he wouldn’t take those kind of risks with sexual activity and he wouldn’t be into risks in the world of bodily harm for example. 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Matt lives off giving pleasure in the bedroom and is more than content with just going one round or having one orgasm if you’ve received everything you wanted and needed. He’s flexible and happy to please. But it also goes without saying that this man is the definition of sexual stamina, he can easily go multiple rounds and has no issue with lasting long. His rounds definitely aren’t short. He’s only interested in multiple rounds though if it’s what you crave. 

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Matt never owned toys and didn’t use them on himself, over time he started to experiment with toys and would happily use them on partners and had nothing against them really. He’d always smile while holding one in his hands, feeling it as a partner told him what it did and how it was used. This man has no security issues with toys, and views them as aids and fun, not competition.

 After dating you, there’s a drawer in the dresser that has a few different toys which he has no issue with. He’s definitely more experienced with them now, having tried things like vibrating strokers but he much prefers using toys on his partner. There’s an immediate smirk on his face as he turns them on, starts using them and hears your sweet noises and feels your body react. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He’s a pleaser and a giver, he’s not really into edging because he just wants to give you pleasure, as much of it as he can, as soon as possible. There are times where he can be a bit playful and tease you, but you don’t even really need to beg for him to stop teasing and give in. He’s just so eager to please and doesn’t want to waste time when he could be loving on your body and making you so happy. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Matt’s pretty vocal and he’s not ashamed of that. He lets out a lot of groans as his brow furrows during sex, it’s an automatic response from him, he naturally makes noises, he’s known to whimper when he’s feeling sensitive and overstimulated, he moans but its his groans that are his loudest, most often and sexiest noise. 

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

That he can become a really needy and clingy lover, especially if you’re coming to the end after a day of multiple rounds. He’s always got to have at least one hand of his on you, he smothers you in kisses. He has you laid on the bed and he’s just still lazily going down on you, slowly as if you’re a dessert that he needs to be savoured. You also happen to be the best dessert he’s ever been able to put in his mouth and enjoy. 

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Whatever you rock with! 

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Generally, Matt Murdock has a longing in his bones that his eyes cannot hide and pierces you with a desperate yearning for touch and love, in that type of matter of the word. But his sex drive is moderate and flexible, he gets a lot of pleasure out of giving pleasure so he doesn’t have an issue being with partners with lower or higher sex drives. He’s someone though who would be happy to just give much more often than receive or have penetrative intercourse as well though. 

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

It depends. He’s big on aftercare and physical affection, so he definitely prioritises that and wouldn’t fall asleep immediately as he’d want to spend time cuddling and talking. After a long ‘double-shift’ of his lawyer by day and vigilante by night lifestyle, there would be times after sex where he would cuddle you and after a bit of talk, he’d fall asleep cuddling you and listening to the drum of your heartbeat as it lulls him to sleep. But sometimes he just likes to cuddle and talk to a ridiculous hour in the morning, he’s definitely an insomniac.

[mysicklove]

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐍𝐄𝐑'𝐒 𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇

DAY 17: VOUYERISM

With: Yoichi Isagi and Meguru Bachira

Word Count: 3.1k

Warnings: Sub/bottom isagi, sub/top bachira, mlm, anal sex, AFAB! reader because of mentions of pegging, but rest is Gn!, overstimulation, doggy style, picture taking, hand job, praise, nickname "baby" once for Isagi

A/N: This is my longest fic yet ! I hope I dont write anything else this long cause how tf am i supposed to write 31 days of this shit

You and Isagi have been dating for a long time. Four years and one hundred and two days to be exact. A long time for people in their twenties, but you loved him, and could never dream about ending it with him.

The two of you had much time to experiment in bed due to how long your relationship has been. Finding out Isagi was more submissive in these types of acts made it much easier for the two of you, and with that knowledge the both of you were determined to find something new and exciting as often as you can. 

So you have tried many things: roleplay, pegging, bondage, strap sucking, sounding, almost everything you can think of, well that are “softer” in the kink domain at least. 

But there are still some things the two of you have not tried. 

“You want me to fuck my best friend in front of you?” Your boyfriend exclaims, eyebrowed raised and mouth open in shock.

“”Best friends”! I am blush–”

“Well he’s actually going to fuck you,” You interrupt, glancing at Bachira who is now staring at Isagi with stars in his eyes.

The dark-haired boy points to himself in confusion, still processing the information. His cheeks warm, and he gulps as he looks over at his soccer partner. The other shoots him a wink and grins as if nothing was amiss. “Yep. Unless you want to fuck me, I am good with that too! Y/N just said you like to take it up–” Isagi covers his mouth in an instant, blushing profusely and looking away. 

He glances back at you, squirming slightly under your gaze. “Isn’t this…Cheating?”

You lean forward and press a soft kiss to his lips, and he melts into it, calming his nerves instantly. “I am asking you to do it,” You say, rubbing your finger along his jaw, with a small reassuring smile.

Bachira sits quietly, but expectantly. The only rule he has was to listen to your commands and the rest was on him. He loved Isagi, so it’s not like he would ever cause him harm, so you weren’t too worried about it.

Isagi nods at you and then turns back to the other boy, the nerves picking up when he makes eye contact with his best friend. “S-Sooooo how do we begi–”

Bachira tackles his best friend with a kiss, pushing the two of them down onto the bedsheets. You chuckle at the eagerness, and Isagi lets out a surprised yelp as his back slams into the mattress.

You grab a pillow and prop it up against the headboard and relax against it, now having a comforting view. The two of them lay in front of you, Bachira still on top, while your boyfriend occasionally sends you glances, as to ask Is this really okay? To which you nod, and hum in encouragement.

Slowly, Isagi begins to relax into the kiss, opening his mouth and allowing Bachiras tongue to slip in. It’s different from your kisses — his are sloppy, and maybe even too much tongue. Still, he doesn’t mind it, though it’s weird to think that he would be kissing someone other than you.

Bachira is the first to pull away, straddling Isagi’s waist and pulling off his shirt. Then he leans forward and helps pulls the other boys off. His lips are back on the boys in an instant, moaning lightly into the kiss. Isagi runs his hands up to the back of the other’s hair, and gently tugs.

Bachira in return mewls into his mouth and bites Isagis lip. The boy yelps out and pulls away, now touching his lip. He turns to you with a small pout. “He bit me!” Then back to Bachira. “You bit me!”

Meguru pants out, “You pulled my hair though? Thought you wanted me to rough you up?”

Isagi fumes at this and turns at you not knowing what to say. You laugh at the two and pat Bachira on his head, considering he is closest to you. “Yoichi is a little bit of a princess. Gotta be treated with care,” You tease, smiling as you run your fingers through the boy’s brown hair.

Your boyfriend grumbles something along the lines of, “I am not a princess,” as he begins to pull off his pants. You grin at him and bark a small laugh.

Bachira on the other hand is soaking up your touch. He seems to purr into it, leaning into the hand. “I’d let you rough me up,” He mumbles with a smile, turning his head to lick your palm.

You raise your eyebrows at his boldness and Isagi scoffs. “Thought you were fucking me?”

“Oooooh Isagi you are jealous little thing aren’t ya? I’m coming, Im coming!” Bachira replies, smiling widely. He seems to pounce on the other before he could murmur a complaint. 

The two continue on and you hum, feeling your own arousal begin to build up. You watch Bachiras hand slip down Isagis’s boxers, and he jumps with a small yelp falling from his lips. “Hands are cold,” He complains to no one in imparticular, before slipping Bachiras pants off.

They both stare at eachother and gulp. The have seen eachother naked in the locker room, hell even Bachira walks around bare every time he gets an opportunity to, but this was different. They were both pulsing, completely hard under each other’s gaze — it was slightly embarrassing. Isagi spares you a glance, and you smile at him. “Different than usual?”

“Y-Yeah. You can say that.”

Bachira chuckles and pulls Isagi back into the kiss, hoping to ease the embarrassment.

The two of them begin grinding against each other, lead by the brown-haired boy. They both are groaning out, pulling away from one another and panting. You take this time to take an indulgent look at the two of their cocks. Isagis is slightly larger, but not by much. Bachiras is thinner, but long.

“Like what you see?” Bachira grins at you, his face red from his movements. 

You chuckle at him, crossing your legs and leaning forward. “You are so pretty Meguru,” You purr, just out of curiosity to see his reaction.

He giggles in return, blushing slightly and then burying his head into Isagis neck. “Mhmmm! You are so lucky Isagi!” 

Isagis hazy eyes flicker to yours and he frowns. “Don’t pout at me. You are just as pretty and you know that ‘chi.”

He seems to take a liking to this answer, so he wraps his arms around Bachiras neck. The dark-haired boy whispers, “You going to do it or not?” into the other’s ear.

“On it boss!” Meguru nods frantically, and begins to prod his finger at Isagis entrance. 

“He’s already prepped," You interrupt before Bachira could question it. "Did it earlier, told him we had a surprise." Isagi slightly blushes, but nods in agreement.

Meguru lets out a long drawn-out whine. “No fair. You guys are taking away all the fun.”

You laugh at the boy, but shrug. Isagi mumbles out a halfhearted, “Sorry man."

Suddenly Isagi is being flipped. He now lays on his stomach, eyes wide, and staring directly at you. He gulps and gives you a small awkward wave. You chuckle and lean forward to press a kiss to his cheek. 

“From behind?” You question, as you pull away from your boyfriend. Bachira begins to pour lube onto his fingers, and directly on the source, causing Isagi to shiver from the coolness of it. 

“Thought you would like seeing Isagis face! Or um, both of ours?” The last part came out as more of a mumble, unsure of his place here.

You lean forward and press a kiss to his lips. Isagi lets out a small shocked noise, and Bachira moans into your mouth, eager by the act of affection. 

You pull away with a small grin, and Bachira stares at you with heavy-lidded eyes. “I’d love to see it.” 

The boy giggles again in response and you smile softly at him. Isagi calls out your name, craning his neck up toward you to give you easier access. You press your lips to his, holding him up by his chin. He groans into your mouth, beginning to inch his tongue in.

Suddenly his eyes fly open and he lets out a broken moan. You pull away to see Bachira behind him, pressing his tip inside already. His hands lay on the other’s hips, and he stares, slightly panting and pressing more of himself in. 

“Impatient, are we?” You question, eyes meeting his yellow ones.

“Ba–ahhh! S-Slow down! I cant–” Isagi hisses, gnawing on the pillow to help ease the intense sensation. Bachira was bigger than anything he has taken before. He was used to smaller toys, and always seem to tremble at the thought of taking something big. This was a whole new feeling for the boy.

He trembles slightly, and Bachira huffs, wiping away a strand from his forehead. “S-So tight, Isagi. I thought you were prepped?”

“I am, asshole! You are going too fast!”

“Yoichi, play nice. He didn’t know,” You coo, brushing back his bangs and sparing him a warm smile. He whines at you, pouting lightly when you take the other side. “But Meguru, take it slow. He’s never taken anything of your size.”

Bachira seems to perk up at this, tearing his eyes from Isagis hips to you. “You think I’m big?”

“Don’t let it get to your head egoist.”

He seems to like this answer, grinning at you, but nodding. “Mines bigger,” Isagi mumbles into the pillow, his back slightly arched to meet Bachiras hips. 

Bachira begins to move again, finally bottoming out. The blue hair boy keens at the feeling, a small yelp falling from his lips. He shuts his eyes and waits for himself to get adjusted. “Hmm you’re right. Maybe then next time we can switch positions!”

Isagi barks a laugh, grateful in the moment for his best friend’s upbeat energy. It seems to ease away the discomfort. After a couple more seconds, he just feels strangely full, less uncomfortable overall.

You watch as Bachira rests his hands on Isagis hips. He sits on his knees from behind the other who is still on all fours. Both of them are flushed red, slightly from the feeling and slightly from the whole thing in general. Never would have thought that they would be fucking each other.

You hum at Bachira, snapping him out of his thoughts. Your eyes tell him to move, so he nods and pulls out, and then in again. 

The two begin to pant, and Bachira keeps to a slow but deep pace, while Isagi is staring up at you. He blinks at you, mouth open to take in more air, and eyes beginning to fog. 

You smile at him and pat his head. “Doing so good Yoichi. Does Megurus cock feel good?”

At the sound of his name, Bachira begins to pick up the pace. He tightens his grip on the other’s hips, and furrows his eyebrows, focusing now on the task at hand. 

Isagi moans out at the change of pace. His eyes slightly roll and he nods at you. “Mhmmm. G-Good.”

Meguru smiles at this, his own moans slipping past him. They are higher in pitch, whiny even, contrasting Isagis lower sort of grumbles of moans. Both were equally cute. With each second, Bachira grows more confident. The sound of slapping skin fills the air, along with an assortment of sounds. 

“Isagis ass feels s-so good! C-Cant get enough of it!” Bachira exclaims, collapsing forward on top of the other, his hands falling next to Isagis shoulders. He presses his chest against the boy’s back when the other’s knees begin to give out.

The two of their faces were inches away from your crossed legs, Isagis now tear-streaked halfway buried into the pillow. It was cute to see him like this, with every breath a whimpery moan escapes, and he was trembling under the weight of it. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. You are going too hard!”

You peer up at Bachira, who is panting heavily now, a small fucked out grin on his face as he seems to only chase his own pleasure. When he feels your gaze, he slightly frowns, afraid you’ll tell him off. “No, please don’t make me slow down! Feels good. I can’t!”

To prove his point, he reaches under Isagi and begins to stroke him off. The blue-haired boys whole body seems to jerk, and a whole new set of tears drip down his cheek. “F-Fuck! Not both at o-once,” he pleads, gripping the pillow with trembling hands.

You don’t say anything, even when Isagi glances up at you with wet, glassy eyes. His whole face is red, and his body bounces toward you with each thrust. You reach down and rub his tears away, and he sniffles at you, before letting out a loud whiny moan when he feels the other graze his prostate. 

“Did you think that at yesterday’s practice, that only the next day your partner would be fucking you in the ass?” You say above the lewd squelching noises. 

Bachira giggles at this, even if the question wasn’t directed to him. “I was–I was so excited!” He sighs, shivering slightly from above him. “It’s better than I thought it would be. Isagi is so warm. And–And t-tight!”

Isagi fumes at both of your statements, his whole face bright pink. The tears don’t make his case any better. He looks absolutely adorable right now, already fucked out. He slightly shakes his head, looking away.

You pull at your phone and point it at the two heads, wanted to keep this photo in your collection of Isagis fucked dumb faces. Bachira takes notice of this and immediately tries to grin, but it comes out wobbly and his eyes are half-lidded. Isagi doesn’t even try to change positions, too fucked out to even care. Meguru takes this time to plunge a finger into his mouth, pulling at the skin to form a makeshift smile. 

It doesn’t work, instead, it just makes Isagi drool even more, and his tongue begins to hang out. You snap the picture and press a kiss to both of their cheeks in thanks. Bachira blushes and tries to smile, while Isagi doesn’t even react, seeming to be in his own little world. 

He is completely limp by this time, his legs given out, but you can see him slightly buck his hips into Bachiras hand. He’s mumbling something along the line of, “So good. ’s so good.” 

Suddenly, he tenses up and grips at the sheets. His whole body begins to shake and he lets out broken airy gasps as he stares at you with wide eyes.

You and Bachira stare, shocked. “Yoichi, did you just–”

“Fuckkkkkkk!” He exclaims, tears coming out in globs and his whole body trembles. Bachira pulls his hand away, that’s now covered in cum. You bark a small laugh, shocked by your lover. He always announced when he had to cum. He must have gotten lost in the pleasure.

You grab the washcloth next to you and wipe his hand off, Bachira’s thrusts slowing down to let you. Once done, he plants his hands back from above the dark-haired boy and begins to pick it up again. “W-Wait but I already!” Isagis says, eyes looking back at you desperately in a plea.

“Meguru hasn’t cum yet. Don’t be selfish, baby.”

He whines out, but a particularly hard thrust makes him lose his breath. “S’alright. D-Dont worry, Isagi. Im close. Im close,” Bachira pants into Isagis neck, his voice shaky and breathless. 

“C-Can I cum?” The boy asks, craning his neck up to look at you, his own eyes beginning to water.

You cock your head to the side and smile at him. “Sure Meguru. Why, aren’t you a good boy?”

He preens at the praise, nodding into Isagis neck, and now wanting desperately to coax some more out of you. It makes him feel giddy, but nice, warm even.

Isagi, whose head is still spinning, and his body tingling from overstimulation, whimpers at your words. “Sorry. ‘m sorry! Im g-good–Ah! too! Please please please!”

You rub your fingers down his face and he shakily grabs at your hands a broken sob falling from his lips at Bachiras force. “Shhh. You are doing so good Yoichi. Such a good boy for me.”

He nods into your touch, soaking up the words, and you use the other hand to pet Bachira’s head. “Im–Im cumming! Oh fuck oh fuck!” He quickly pulls out of Isagi and reaches back to stroke himself off through it.

He cums onto the dark-haired boy’s ass, and back. He hisses through it, shutting his eyes and grinding his teeth together. You coax him through it with soft coos, while Isagi leans into your hand as he waits for his best friend to come down from his high. His legs shake and fall limp against the bed.

A couple of seconds later Bachira collapses next to him. The both of them are on their stomachs next to one other. Immediately, Bachira is cuddling up to Isagi, loving the warmth of the other. You grin at the two and run your fingers through their hair. 

“Well, that was fun! Was I really a good boy?” Bachira exclaims, his energy coming back not even minutes later. He peers up at you and kicks his legs from behind him.

Isagi throws him a weak punch on the shoulder, too exhausted to do any better. “Watch it. That’s my nickname. Worked four years for it.”

Bachira lets out a dramatic whine. “What? Isagiiiii. Don’t be so selfish!”

“Maybe if you bottom next time, they will call you that. You'll see what hell I was put through to deserve it,” Isagi sighs, cuddling up to your knee and the pillow beneath him. You smile at him, and he seems to purr under your touch.

Bachira taps his chin, and cocks his head to the side. “Then why did you cum so early if you didn’t like it?”

Isagi grabs the pillow next to him and shoves it in his best friend’s face. “Stupid fucking egoist,” He sighs, closing his eyes, even with his face blooming red from embarrassment.

You hear Bachiras muffled laugh from behind the pillow.

PREV POST | MASTERLIST | NEXT POST

[poppy-metal]

hi hello yes can I hear about what tashi's training sessions for art look like. I think if I don't hear more about this I shall explode

hehe - the thing is, arts kind of a natural at it. he just had the wrong view on bdsm as a whole - as most people who dont partake in it do - thinking it was all whips and chains and the more severe side of things and, and, art cant see himself wanting to hit you with things like a whip - or wanting to chain you up. but tashi is more than happy to teach him its much more than that.

"bdsm is mostly about mutual trust and consent." she states more or less plainly. and art kinda blinks because he hadn't thought about it that way. he likes the idea of trust and consent. its kinda his whole thing. "the sub has the power." that makes his eyebrows draw together.

"but. they're getting dominanted - isn't. doesn't that mean giving up power... to the dom?"

tashi shakes her head. he's so naivě. "its about the submissive giving that control over willingly. and having the power to retract that submission back at any point they desire. its a gift. they're trusting their dom to give them what they need. bdsm should always be about the subs pleasure. sometimes that pleasure looks different for different couples. a sub could find pleasure in being hit, sure, but they could also find pleasure in servicing their dom. in following rules. in simply being told to sit and look pretty. the doms pleasure should come from fulfilling that. a good dom, anyway."

when she puts it like that - its easier for art to hop on board. he hadn't thought of it that way, but he thinks about it now. about you trusting him, trusting him with what turns you on, gifting him your submission and trusting him to give you what you need. he likes that alot.

"you can practice on patrick and me." tashi tells him and he chokes.

its news to him to learn both patrick and tashi are switches. well, both of them lean more dominant, but sometimes they like the feeling of giving that power up. though she explains they both have more of a tendency to be a brat.

"i have a feeling you'll like brat taming. especially when it comes to your wife - she doesn't know it yet, i think. but she's definitely in need of discipline. its why she wants to be spanked."

and though art was initially against the idea of laying his hand on you, on anyone - tashi again explains it to him in a way that makes perfect sense somehow. like all the pieces of a puzzle sliding into place, fitting perfectly.

"brats usually just want one thing - attention. being brought to heel after acting out is your way of showing them you hear them. you care about them enough to correct their behavior and set them on the right path."

she also adds, "it's also a really high endorphin rush - challenging someone and having that challenge met. that's what i like about it. with giving and receiving. i like being challenged and coming out on top, and i like doing the challenging and meeting my match."

and suddenly he thinks he understands you better than he ever has before. he'd thought you cruel. spiteful and he'd wondered if you even loved him anymore countless times. through this lense though - a new narrative comes to light. one where you just want his attention. where you just want him to show you he cares. he thinks he's neglected you terribly in that aspect. he's always one to back down and concede. he didn't want to overstep your boundaries, but maybe you'd simply been issuing a challenge this whole time and he'd refused to strike back. he feels stupid for not realizing it sooner.

tashi sees him realize it, and puts her hand over his. "would you like to try? i know i said the submissive is the one with the power - but a doms feelings are just as important. you should both want it."

he does want to try.

its a different dynamic than he's used to with tashi. when together, she usually takes the lead. there hasn't been any..... bdsm elements to their sex, but he definitely follows her direction. in a way - its not that different. he's listening to what she tells him. and she's not shy about what she likes.

she doesn't like to be smacked hard - quick swats on her ass are what she likes best. alternating between cheeks so the burn isn't delegated to just one area.

she spreads herself over his lap in her little black panties and wiggles her butt. she smirks at him over her shoulder - "its okay to get into it." she tells him. "a brat wants to piss you off. they want a reaction. its no fun if you're being a pussy about it -"

art swings his hand down then - because a little spark of irritation does go through him - he hates being called names. tashi gasps and rocks back into it. art feels himself harden. bites his lips as he palms her ass.

"green?" because he'd learned the color system just about an hour ago.

tashi arches back against him - "green." she reassures him and he spanks her again. the moan she lets out is encouragement enough to keep going.

he's suprised by how much he likes it. he likes smoothing his palm over her ass after a smack, soothing her into a false sense of security before he's at her again. he feels the heat from her skin from each smack. feels the damp of her cunt against his thigh and he imagines you like this. spread out over his lap, but you're squirming, squirming away from the pain but you're still saying green everytime he asks.

you're not tashi though - so he reigns in the urge he has to suddenly hit harder. focuses in on tashi again.

but she smiles at him like she knows where his mind went anyway.

"i bet she'd like it harder." tashi goads. she's rubbing her pussy against his thigh. "knowing her - yeah, she'd want you to beat her black and blue. until she was crying. then she'd want you to kiss it better. coddle her like the baby she is."

his cock throbs in his sweats. he palms her ass. "tashi." he warns.

"c'mon you've had to imagine it. I know i have." she huffs and continues to rock back and forth against him. getting herself off. "god, she'd look so hot with her little ass turned red. you could probably slide right inside her after - she'd be so fucking wet - ah!"

art spanks her again. than again. again and again until tashi is panting and he's sliding a hand under her body to slip his fingers inside her cunt where shes hot and wanting

"yes, that's it." she gasps. "god you're so good at this -"

he takes the praise in stride, pumps his fingers aggressively into her until shes creaming around him. shuddering in his lap.

he runs a palm down her slick back. gentle. thinks about you again, and how soft and limp you'd be after he was done with you. how he'd get to just hold you after and pour his love into you and you'd be too fucked out to do anything but accept it.

tashi sits up. she palms his hard cock and art groans.

"now i want you to think of her." she tells him as she slides her hand into his sweats and grips him in her fist. "fuck my hand like its her mouth. show me how you'd make her take it -"

art thinks this'll be the end of him. he loses himself in the thought. its like tashi isn't even there. there's just the heat of her palm around his dick and he's punching his hips up into the tight circle of it - thinking of the wet tight heat of your throat. he thinks of all the harsh words you'd spewn his way recently - thinks of punishing you for them - for being a lying little brat - why couldn't you just tell him this is what you wanted - he would have learned sooner - he would have done anything you wanted - but you're so fucking stubborn. such a stubborn girl. more so than he is, because at least now hes trying. hes changing for you.

he'll come get you. and then he'll have a few things to show you - things will be different. you'll see.

[kyyuri]

the sweet whisperings of you and i (plays like a broken record )

┊ ˚➶ ｡˚ ☁️ synopsis ; after spending many years longing for a friend group of her own, fate presents yn with a chance to make that long wait end, at the expense of her three year long relationship with nishimura riki - but was fate really that cruel ? or was there perhaps sabotage ?

pairing // non- idol ! riki x fem ! yn

genre // angst, a bit of fluff , lovers to ex to lovers

warnings // curse words, toxic friends

a/n ! SO SORRY FOR THE DELAY IN UPLOADING THIS 😭 would be going on a mini hiatus ( two weeks-ish ? ) as i have a lot of submission to do for school 🥲 encore ! would definitely be back soon ! don’t forget to support enhypen’s comeback ! the trailer was insane and im here for it ! PLEASE DONT FORGET TO LET ME KNOW HOW YOU GUYS FEEL ABOUT THIS ONE SHOT !

wc; 11.6k (not proof read )

[main masterlist ]

i.

growing up with parents that were filthy rich yet never present in her life, yn was subjected to many struggles in life. it was only normal for her to wish for her parents’ presence during the hardest times — but yn’s wishes never came true and it never will. materialism isn’t something yn is unfamiliar with. her parents’ have long decided that love is anything money can buy and so, yn spent her entire life craving for something far beyond money.

after spending so much time alone, it wasn’t easy for yn to get used to an environment packed with human presence, high school. it didn’t take long for her to be outcasted either. despite her pretty looks, yn was never a fool when it came to people attempting to take advantage of her for monetary reasons. her constant rejections made many upset and so the rumours began spreading like wildfire and everyone ran with it. those were some painful days for yn. she would recall running into the arms of her driver for a warm hug whenever a new rumour appears out of nowhere. “ did i do something wrong ?” it was a question her driver often heard, “no darling, people are just harsh creatures who work hard to get what they want, even if their methods are unethical.”

there was only one thing ( or maybe two ) that yn looked forward to in her high school days. the time she invested in the photography club. since her parents couldn’t be there for her physically, she would spend hours living through pictures of others vicariously, making up fake scenarios of her with her parents. that led to her realising her never ending love for photography. although, the members there treated her poorly, she never once complained. it was also then, she met the one and only nishimura riki. up till now, yn still has no clue why riki approached her instead of shunning her like the rest. it was the start of a beautiful friendship which ultimately blossomed into something much more, to say the very least.

ii.

just like that, riki has been through thick and thin with yn, but this time as her boyfriend of three years. riki thinks she’s the most precious person in the entire world and yn think he is her entire world. the love they shared was believed to be eternal, considering how they were always stuck to the hips yet never once got bored of each other. yn’s insecurities ? riki knew them all by heart as well as how to counter them - how to make her feel loved. riki’s hobbies ? she have them all engraved onto the back of her head - always ready to learn more about them so riki would know how much she supported him and the things he take a liking for.

for three years, they were the perfect couple. for three years, nothing could come between them, not friends, not families and not even the worst arguments. riki knew of yn’s family background and so he made sure to never end the day with any of them upset with each other. it was one of the sweetest things he could do for his loved one.

just like any other normal night, riki laid in bed with his arms wrapped comfortably around yn. “i promise this is the last time i will bring this up, but are you sure you don’t want to meet my friends ? you guys might have a blast together !” he looked at her fondly, “it’s alright, ki. i want to be able to approach people on my own and be friends with them ! i haven’t had much opportunities in high school so i think i should step out of my comfort zone now that i’m going to university !” yn answered, snuggling closer to riki. “thank you for always keeping me in your thoughts.” riki laughed softly, “you practically live in my mind rent free. “

iii.

things were always easier with riki by her side. it was almost as if nishimura riki was her soulmate since the very start. she made up for his shortcomings and he made up for hers. they were always willing to accommodate to each other, never afraid to grow in each other’s presence. this was one of the things many people secretly admired about their relationship. it became crystal clear to yn that nishimura riki would inevitably be her first and last love because if she had a list of reasons why she loved him, it would never end. the moments they spent together were so well cherished, they often played inside her mind like a broken record - giving her ample amount of time to reminisce about those beautiful memories. to yn, nothing was worth trading the good memories riki created with her. to think riki could love her even at her worst was truly unbelievable ( at least to her).

when she first had her period while dating him and so unfortunately stained the pants she had worn that day, riki didnt make a big fuss about it at all. “ki, stop coming closer. please ?” “what’s wrong ?” she looked around flustered, unable to come up with an explanation that wouldn’t leave her feeling embarrassed or awkward. “did i do something wrong ? “ she shook her head, still pressing her lips together. “then… can you at least tell me why i can’t come closer ?” riki looked a bit upset at how adamant she was in making him stay away. yn pressed her back harder against the wall, hoping to at least slide past him and into the restroom. observing her body language, it finally hit him what had inevitably happened. “give me a minute. don’t go anywhere. i’ll be back really quickly. “ he most definitely stayed true to his words, in less than a minute, he came running back to her with the sweats he kept in his locker for dance practice. “here. you can change into these. when you’re done, wait here for me. i’ll go grab some painkillers and a bag for you to keep your clothes in.”

when yn first got a part time job so she could pay for riki’s birthday present, she had a hard time adjusting to the crazy schedule. thankfully for her, riki was always there to welcome her in a warm embrace when she returned home. “bad day ?” he pulled her towards the sofa he was seated on, “yeah. the manager keeps giving me backhanded compliments. i hate it there. and you should let me go now, i haven’t showered yet, i probably smell.” this only made riki tighten the hug even more. “ i haven’t seen you since school ended, im not letting you go that easily. you know, if you really have a hard time working there, you can always quit. whatever you need money for you can just tell me, i’ll go get a job instead and buy it for you.” such a sweet boy, always caring about how she feels and willing to sacrifice his time for her. “that won’t be necessary. i want to do this on my own. i won’t push myself to the limit, you know this ki. i’ll quit if it goes too far. thank you for thinking of me.” he hummed in reply. “well, i got something for you that might help take your mind of that witch ! its in the fridge right now, you can have it whenever you want. “ riki loosened his grip, resulting in the girl to run towards the kitchen instantly. “is that the strawberry cake from the newly opened store ? the one with a 3 hour long queue ?” she examined the cake slowly. “yeah ! i figured i might as well get it while waiting for you to end your shift. it was so annoying waiting under the sun but the smile on your face right now made it so worth it.” he gave her a cheeky smile.

when yn finally managed to get the gift she worked hard for, riki was there to celebrate it with her (even though it was quite literally meant for him). “ki ! remember how i said i wanted to get the thing i needed on my own ? well i did it ! i also resigned from that shitty place. “ “THAT’S GREAT ! c’mon ! let’s go out for dinner to celebrate ! my treat !” he spunned yn around from happiness. riki didn’t ask any questions, he was just glad that yn was free from the misery that came along with working in that store. he was also glad that he was now able to spend more time with her again. once yn’s feet touched the ground, she put her hand up, almost as if she was signalling him to stop. “why not you take a look at what i bought ! i can’t be excited about it alone.” taking the bag from her, riki took a peak. inside the bag, sat a beautiful wrapped nintendo switch with a console customised to suit riki’s aesthetics. “no way ! you got a switch ! i’ve always wanted one ! i’ll get one soon and then we can play together !” he reached his hand out to return the switch to her, “it’s for you, ki. it’s an early birthday present ! that’s why i was so persistent on working to get it for you. i wanted to use my own money to buy a gift for you. i thought it would be more meaningful than getting it using my parents’ money.” she could’ve sworn she saw riki tear up. “yn, have i ever told you how much i love you ?” he melted into her embrace, trying to stop himself from sniffling like a little child. “ everyday, nishimura. i’m well aware of it.”

iv.

the first day of university was the one of the days yn considered the hardest. orientation was the bane of her existence and yet she was powerless in this situation. it didn’t help at all knowing riki was placed in a completely different orientation group because of the degree he was pursuing in arts ( while yn chose one in fashion ) . sulking, she waved him a final goodbye before dragging her footwear with much exaggeration. he chuckled at his girlfriend’s cute antics before running up to give her one last hug, “love, you’re going to be fine. you’ll meet plenty of nice people there and your dorm mates as well ! i’ll text you whenever i can so give this group a chance ?” she nodded her head at riki’s words, still pouting.

life without riki was … boring. she didn’t need anyone else by her side, she just needs riki. her attempts at distracting herself by drawing circles on the ground with her fingers were working until two female pop up in front of her face. “you’re yn right ? im yuju. this is minhee. we are your dorm mates ! i hope we get along well !” the female reached her hands out. smiling, she took her hand gladly. this was yn giving the group a chance and knowing riki, he would be beaming with joy if he saw this scene with his own eyes.

this conversation led to many more exchanged within the trio. within the period of a short day, yn had learnt many things. two of which being that minhee and yuju had been best friends since elementary and that minhee had a boyfriend, jaehyeok in the same university as well. “i hope you understand if jaehyeok comes by the dorms often !” minhee exclaimed, directing her statement at yn. “that’s fine by me as long as my boyfriend gets to come by as well.” “you have a boyfriend ?” yuju shot her a look of disbelief. yn smiled back in response. “no way.. im the only one single here ?! what’s his name ?” “nishimura riki.” the look minhee and yuju exchanged was one that confuses her a lot but she doesn’t question it, not wanting to make them uncomfortable considering how they are one step away from forging a friendship. “interesting…” was all yuju could managed subsequently.

for the first time in awhile, yn felt like she was alive. it felt so good having friends of the same gender after being left alone for half of her life. it made her feel even better knowing that these girls were the ones that were going to be with her 24/7 thanks to their dormitory placement. “im so happy ! i’m literally floating right now. they were so nice and relatable ?! yuju was so supportive of me the whole time and minhee is so good at planning. she even got the whole layout of our dorm settled and suited for our needs. i fucking love them so much.” riki chuckled at her excitement, its been a while since he has seen her this happy. kissing her forehead, riki smiled, “it makes me happy seeing you this excited. i hope they continue to treat you well. let me know if you guys ever need help, okay ?”

“would you be able to help me move my stuff to the dorms today ? when you’re done moving yours of course.”

“im down to help at seven. you need anything else ?” yn shooked her head.

v.

seven came and rolled by real fast. the door bell rang and yuju shot up immediately, “i’ll get it.” no one thought much of it since minhee also made sure everyone knew that her boyfriend, junhyeon was dropping by to help out as well. “nishimura riki ?” yuju leaned against the door frame. “how do you know my name ?” his brows furrowed, “yn told me about you. i’ve heard plenty. im yuju.” she offered a hand to shake only for riki to decline it with a smile, “im here to help my girlfriend so can you let me in ? thanks.” biting her cheeks, she moved aside for him to enter. “ ki ! you’re here !” “hello love.” yn ran into his hands, allowing him to spin her around in a circle. “let’s get to unpacking hm ? the faster we do this, the more time we can spend watching slam dunk.” she nodded in excitement before dragging him towards her room.

“what do you think about him ?” yuju whispered to minhee. “who ?” “nishimura.” minhee shot her a look, “let’s not talk about it while he’s here, ju.”

being with riki always made everything feel more fun than it should be. unpacking ? that’s a competition waiting to be won right there. cleaning up ? first one to grab the best tool gets to use it to clean. life would rarely be boring and this was definitely one of the boring moments in life that riki made enjoyable for yn. “how am i supposed to clean the window with a broom ?” yn pouted, “hey. you grabbed it, not me.” riki laughed and as much as he was definitely following the rules, he would ALWAYS make sure to help yn - who always grabs the wrong tools out of frenzy - to clean up with her tool. she grabbed a broom to clean a window ? no worries, by the time riki is done, that broom would magically become a stick attached to a wet cloth.

“anddddddd we are done.” riki fell onto the bed from exhaustion. “ewwww ki, we are literally disgusting right now. let’s change out first, your hoodie and sweats are still in my closet.” and by the time the couple was done, they were snuggled closely with her laptop placed on the pillow with slam dunk playing. it didn’t take long for the couple to fall asleep with their hands wrapped around each other tightly.

vi.

when yn woke up to a missing riki and the delicious smell of pancakes floating in the air, she jumped out of bed and sprinted towards the dining area. “good morning yn.” yuju and minhee greeted as they sit across each other, indulging in a plate of riki’s self made breakfast. “good morning love. you can go get your teeth brushed first, i saved you a plate and i made bungeoppang and bought some banana milk too. come eat when you’re ready.” giving riki her signature cheeky smile, she dashed into the bathroom. “you know riki, you’re a really great boyfriend. yn is lucky to have you. thank you for the breakfast, it was really good. ”yuju smiled. he looked around the room awkwardly, “um, thanks ? honestly, im the one who is lucky. i can’t believe i even got yn to date me… im glad you enjoyed the meal though, it’s yn’s favourite.”

“ki ! ki ! the food critic is ready.” riki chuckled at his girlfriend’s antics, looking at her full of love despite her childish side showing. “eat well my little duckling.” riki thinks he could watch yn eat all day long and he would never once get sick of it. when he first found out that yn hasn’t had a home cooked meal in the longest time due to her parent’s lack of care, he took it upon himself to master the art of cooking just so she could taste the slightest feeling of homeliness. the first few times he tried to whip up a meal almost resulted in the fire department being called to make a trip to his area. the challenges he faced didn’t stop there. when he tried again the following week, using his sisters as his lab rats, the stiffened look on their face confirmed his failure. time and time again, he failed to make something that could be on par to that of a homely meal. he had to beg his grandmother to teach him her ways just so he could shower yn with the love that her inner child deserves. all the cooking lessons he got definitely did not go to waste, and with many burn scars and cuts on his hands, he proudly presented to her a lunchbox full of love.

“thank you for the meal ! i owe you one. you should probably get going though, class starts in an hour and if you stay any longer, i just might ditch to stare at your face.” she hugged him, “wouldn’t that be a win for me ?” he wiggled his eyebrows before the two exchanged sickeningly sweet “i love you”s and bid each other farewell.

“gosh, its like you guys are attached to the hip.” minhee giggled at the sight before her. “i guess i’ve grown to be a little reliant on him. “ a fond smile attach onto yn’s face.

vii.

having friends taking the same degree as her definitely made university more endurable. “what the flying fuck is wrong with the professor ? its only our first week and we suddenly have a solo project each ? he drops the most vague description of what we are supposed to do and calls it a day ?” minhee tugged at her hair in annoyance. “it looks like the other departments aren’t having it easy either, riki just texted saying that he has a full painted portrait assigned, due in a month.” yn sighed. “this isn’t the university life i had in mind. all i wanted to do was get a degree while partying and falling in love. let’s just mug tomorrow, i have no mood for this today. ” yuju stuffed a bunch of sketches down into her bag.

once the trio returned to the warmth of their dormitory, the collapsed to the ground immediately. “hey yn, is riki coming over again ?” yn hummed, agreeing to the statement. “i’ll go get changed first, help me let him in if he arrives earlier than expected.” upon receiving a thumbs up from minhee, the girl headed towards her room. “i have a crush on riki.” yuju whispered out of the blue. minhee sat up, eyes wide open in shock. “what ?! have you lost your mind ? he’s TAKEN. by YOUR roommate.” minhee whispered back. “it doesn’t matter. i think he’s attractive and he is my walking ideal type. i WANT him, and besides its not like i like yn a lot anyways. she’s so annoying, riki this riki that.” silence fell upon the two. “help me sabotage their relationship. please. you’re my bestfriend.” “okay.”

the sudden knock on the main door sent the two into a shock, considering how they were scheming for someone else’s downfall. “nishimura, you’re here. you can wait by the couch. yn is getting changed.” yuju batted her eyelashes. he doesn’t reply, just giving her a blank stare - one enough to make her a flustered mess. “riki ! you’re here !” “love ! come give me a cuddle !” he pushed past the girl standing by the door and jogged towards his girlfriend. their sweet moment didn’t last long. not with the other two around scheming. “yn, im so sorry ! could you do the chores now ? i have to run to the store and get ready dinner for jaehyeok just told me he had a bad day and the kitchen’s in a mess and i dont have enough time and please-“ minhee shot yn a desperate glance. “i’ll do it, go get the stuff you need. it’s really not a big deal.” “thank you, youre a life saver.”

riki thinks they aren’t genuine friends but the way your face lights up whenever you talk about them makes him wish he was wrong. “i’ll help you love, it would be faster that way. “ he tugged a strand of her hair behind her ear and the two got to cleaning. to think that she would waste such precious time with riki to clean up someone else’s mess. “i know you’re a little upset yn.” riki exclaimed, not looking up from the area he was trying to mop. “im sorry, i didn’t mean to spread the negative energy. i can’t help but feel upset. i wanted to spend time with you since we are going to be so busy starting from tomorrow.” riki chuckled at how adorable his girlfriend is. “yn, every moment i spend next to you will always be precious to me. it doesn’t matter if i’m cleaning the dumpster or watching movie with you. i love doing things with you because i love you, hmm ? no matter how busy i am, i’ll always find a way back to you.” while it pleased yn hearing that, it definitely angered another ( especially since their failed scheming only ended up bringing the couple closer )

viii.

with everyone’s submission date approaching at the speed of light, the small break time riki had were all invested in hanging out with yn. he was exhausted but he would never let her know that. seeing her face for even an hour would make everything worth it. he didn’t see anything wrong with spending time with his girlfriend until he accidentally overheard something he shouldn’t have. regrets started pouring in and he questioned how selfish he could be. “yn, im honestly sick of it. we may be your roommates but we are also your best friends. if you’re going to spend every waking hour with riki, do you really need us ? we are trying our hardest here to find a time where we can hang out with you but your entire personality is about riki ! riki this riki that. fuck yn, we get it. we seriously get it. but if you aren’t going to put any effort into our friendship, then i think its better we end it.” he heard yuju say, with hints of frustration buried in her voice. “i didn’t know you guys felt that way… i’ll accommodate. i promise ! please don’t ever say anything about ending our friendship… please…”

to say riki’s heart shattered at the sound of his girlfriend’s trembling voice is an understatement, because he was in absolute shambles. “fuck this is my fault…” he cursed under his breath, kicking the wall next to him. when the main door unlocked to reveal yn, he dropped any hint of sadness on his face in hopes that she wouldn’t find out about what he heard. “hey, ki ? do you think we could… meet lesser ? just for now at least…” it was such an absurd request. “okay, love. i’ll be waiting for you. let me know whenever you’re free, i’ll come running to you. when im not here, promise me you’ll take care of yourself okay ? no skipping meals, no pushing yourself to the limits. i love you. “ he gave her one last hug, one that wouldn’t be returned even after a week.

that week was horrible to both riki and yn. so much changed in so little time. for the first time in a while, yn felt lonely again. it feels just like the times her parents would leave her alone to go on business trips that would last for months. being together with yuju and minhee didn’t help the situation she was in a lot but it was still better than nothing. and with each passing day, riki gets more nervous. it wasn’t just the fact that he hasnt caught a glimpse of her face since the day he hugged her, but the fact that yn temporarily stopped replying to his messages. was there something wrong ? was she okay on her own ? he would never admit it but he was always as reliant on yn as she was on him and this time apart physically pained him. finally deciding it was too much for him to bear, he ran to her dorm, pounding on the door in hopes that she would be there. “nishimura ? why are you here ?” yuju questioned. “where’s my girlfriend ? is she okay ? she hasn’t been responding to my texts and i’m starting to get worried.” yuju laughed, puzzling the man. “she’s alright. her phone’s getting fixed. minhee accidentally spilled water on it a few days back. they are out getting groceries, i’m sure they’ll be back soon. would you like to come in and wait ?” he couldn’t figure out if this was some sort of trap but at the very moment, he decided that being able to see his girlfriend was the most important thing and with that, riki entered the dorm.

the room was dead silent. yuju couldn’t stand it, not one bit. “you know, nishimura. you really piqued my interest a lot. you seem to be willing to do anything for yn.” she started. “yeah ? maybe because i actually love her ?” yuju laughs again. “it must’ve drove you insane when yn’s phone broke. i wish i could see it with my two eyes… here. it’s my number. yn’s phone is getting sent back around… the end of this week ? you can contact me if you want to know how she’s doing.” her hands reach out, placing a piece of paper into the palms of riki’s hands. “it wouldn’t be wise to throw it away. after all, yn is staying with me.”

“ju ! we’re back ! where should i put the - ki ! you’re here !” dropping the groceries, she made a run towards him, jumping into his arms. “i miss you so much, you don’t even know.” he buried his head into the crook of her neck. “can we hang out, please ? i don’t want to leave just yet.” he mumbles. “hey, um min ? would you be able to handle the groceries alone ? i… wanna hang with my boyfriend.” giving yn a nod of assurance, the couple then headed towards yn’s room.

ix.

there was silence again, but this time a more comforting one. “i think this is the longest i’ve gone without interacting with you ever since we started dating.” riki combed through yn’s hair with his fingers as the two lie in bed. “i’m sorry, i should have told you earlier. our schedules clashed a lot recently especially since submission is round the corner. i thought about just getting another phone but yuju convinced me out of it.” he looked at his girlfriend with atmost adoration. “next time anything happens, just let me know… somehow. mail me a letter if you have to, okay ? here, you can use my phone first. yuju said it won’t be repaired completely till the end of this week. i have a spare phone so i’ll contact you through that.” although the two haven’t seen each other in days, it’s the smallest things that reassure yn that their relationship would be nothing but good. “i love you, riki.” she whispers. “and i love you too, yn.”

“fuck, its clearly not working. riki is too much of a green flag for him to fuck up a three, almost four year relationship with that bitch.” yuju punched at the kitchen countertop. “okay, then sabotaged their relationship through yn. there’s something odd about her. if you find the insecurity, you basically have the upper hand right ?” minhee shrugged, placing another packet of biscuits onto the upper shelf. yuju smirked, “i guess this calls for a girls’ night.”

with that, the trio sat in yuju’s room later on in the night. “i never had a girl’s night before… what do you usually do ?” yn innocently asked the two. “we spill all our secrets and have fun. we drink until the sun’s up and sleep in the same room together.” minhee answered, pouring the three of them a shot of soju. “since me and min already know each other for many years, we’ll mainly ask you the questions and you can ask any one of us !” yn nodded, “can i start ?” as usual, the two girls nodded. “min, how did you and jaehyeok meet ?” minhee downed the shot, “when the next door neighbour is hot and summer fling material, things were bound to happen. he asked me out around the time summer ended i think about five years ago ?” yn’s chest felt warm, is this what it feels like to have friends ? friends that were willing to share secrets like its their prized possession ? “what about you, yn ? did something happen in the past ? i’m sorry if its a sensitive topic but you seem very attached to riki and very new to all these friend stuff…” yuju stared at the ground after managing to get the question she longed to get answers for out of her mouth.

there it was. a pang to her heart. it feels almost uncomfortable, but that’s the type of things friends would ask right ? because they cared. “ah… well, i never had any friends before riki came into my life. most of the people i went to school with tried to take advantage of my parents’ wealth through me so i never had a chance to make a genuine friend with the exception of riki. my parents… they aren’t very… physically or emotionally involved in my life… they send me presents every now and then but were never there when i needed them or when i just accomplished a milestone. oddly, i don’t resent them.” it felt like the weight has been lifted off her shoulders when she said that out loud. “that’s because you know they love you. love is everything money can buy and based on what you said, it looks like they bought you everything.” yuju said, giving yn a pat on the back to show her support. “what about your boyfriend though ? does he buy you expensive stuff ?” minhee inquires. “i prefer spending time with him over getting gifts from him, so i don’t really mind not getting a lot. he also says he is saving up for something. he has been saving ever since we started dating. i thought it was for a car but he has one already and is still saving. i never asked about it since he didn’t tell me why the first time i asked.” yn took a shot. “ has it ever occurred to you that maybe just maybe… he doesn’t love you as much as he makes it seem ? i mean we already established that love is anything money can buy but he barely even get you anything. your phone broke and the best he did was give you his used one ? it’s not even brand new. your parents love each other, right ? they give each other expensive things. your parents love you, they give you expensive things. jaehyeok loves min, he gives her expensive handbags. even when people get married, they propose with expensive rings yn, not with spending time.” she took another shot. did riki really love her ? “look, you’re one of us now. we are just looking out for you… why not you test him ? tell him you broke your airpods and see how he react. if he loves you, he would drop everything and get you a new one - even if it means touching the savings he have.” minhee gave yn a pat on the back. it was all going according to plan.

x.

the next time riki saw yn, there was this pressing feeling that something bad was about to happen - a feeling that he never felt before around her. “a penny for your thought, love ?” riki caressed her cheeks as the two laid on the sofa in his dorm. “it’s really nothing of concern, ki. thanks for asking. oh, i got my phone back so you can have yours back.” she passed him the item, not sparing him a glance. riki was never dense, he could tell yn was planning something. something that might not lead to the best outcome. “okay, if you need anything else let me know alright. i’ll try my best to help you out.” the sweet boy offered. “i broke my airpods… i tried asking my parents for new ones but they aren’t reachable at the moment…”

“do you wanna use my headphones instead then ? until you can get a replacement. ” and that’s when it all happened.

“fuck this… why do you always offer me your used stuff when shits happen to mine ? why can’t you buy me new ones…” she stared at the ground stubbornly. “i… i didn’t know you would want me to get them for you… you always told me to not spend on you excessively , but if you really want me to get you them , i can… give me a week …? i should be able to get a job by then…” the boy was confused, is this really what she wanted from him all along ? for him to shower her with love by buying her luxury items ? he must’ve been a bad boyfriend for not noticing it especially after years of dating. “work ..? you have a whole bank account filled with money… and you wouldn’t even touch it for me ? what’s so important about the thing you’re saving up for… what makes it more important than me ? even minhee’s boyfriend spends money on her ! she gets a new luxury bag almost every month…” tears were rolling down yn’s face by then. riki hugged her tightly, giving her soft pats on the back, “i can’t tell you just yet but please trust me, love. i’ll get you new airpods by the end of the week, okay ? please don’t be upset. i’m really sorry for not realising earlier that i should’ve showered you with things you like. i’ll buy luxury bags for you too… please don’t cry anymore…”

he hated everything he has done to make her this upset, but most of all, he hated himself.

xi.

reaching out to heeseung, the boy agreed to help be a photographer for his project - earning him a total of three hundred and fifty dollars per shoot. it wasn’t enough so he agreed to model for jay’s fashion line as well - allowing him to invest hundred dollars more into your gift for every hour he worked. riki was hellbent on getting you more than just that airpods you cried over. he was going to get you everything you ever wanted. “dad ? can i choreograph for a class ? i kinda need a bit of money now… two days would be enough… that should earn me about six hundred dollars…”

“i think i was too harsh. i should apologise to him.” yn said, sipping on her drink sadly. she felt guilty. riki was willing to do everything for her and all she did was whine and complain about the amount of effort he put in. “no ! don’t do that ! if you say sorry, he would never take your requests seriously ever again. he might even love you lesser since you’re so easy to guilt trip. if he loves you, he would work for it and hang out with you during the duration of him buying you those items.” yuju affirmed the girl.

with the amount of jobs riki took, it was hard for him to make time for his girlfriend. he would spend eight hours of his day in school, painting, drawing, sculpting. then, spend another three hours taking pictures of the models heeseung hired. it was then another four hours modelling for jay, leaving him with only nine hours left to fulfil one’s basic needs as well as make time for yn and homework. on the days where he has dance classes to teach, he wouldn’t even be able to catch a glimpse of yn considering how he was running all over the place. the texts exchanged gradually became lesser as exhaustion took a toll on riki both mentally and physically. but he was okay with it, because the outcome would eventually bring a smile back on his girlfriend’s face.

riki doesn’t realise he had fallen asleep… in the middle of his home date with yn. she watched the boy rest in the most uncomfortable position, wondering how he even managed to sleep through that. wondering how he could even sleep during the few hours he barely made to spend with her after almost ghosting her for the entire week. picking up riki’s camera, she pressed on the gallery button and instantly wished she didn’t. inside the file were many photos of beautiful girls dressed in the prettiest clothings, if not, beautiful girls wrapping their hands around riki as the two smile for the camera, wearing matching outfits. the camera that was once filled with many photos of her was now replaced with many photos of other girls.

yn covered her mouth to muffle the sobs. how could he so selfishly throw away a relationship they invested so much time in ? riki groaned as he got up, rubbing his eyes to clear his vision, he had heard her crying in his sleep and felt the absolute need to check up on her. “love…? are you crying ?why are you crying ? do you want to talk about it ? i … still have some time to spare.” she pushed the camera towards him. “fuck you, riki. why did you do this to me ? no… how could you do this to me… “ love, what are you talking about ? did i hit you by accident when i was asleep ?” the tears continue to pour from her eyes. “let’s break up. i-i saw the photos with the girls… my decision.. it’s final.” it was now riki’s turn to cry. he felt his vision blur. “so that’s it …? i don’t get a say in it too ? i don’t get to explain ? please… please reconsider… i want to spend my whole life with you… i want you to be my very first and last love… yn, please…” he knelt before her, sobbing. “no, riki. my friends… they were right all along. they said you didn’t love me since the start. work ? that was just an excuse to cheat wasn’t it ?you had money saved up… so you used that as an excuse to meet other girls… everything minhee’s boyfriend did for her… you never did for me. you’re so busy these days you don’t even bother replying to my messages only for me to find out that you’re with other girls. when we do hang out, it always end with you falling asleep halfway or you being distracted and i’m tired of it… this is the end.” “yn love, i didn’t cheat, i swear ! i really was working…” “quit lying.” she stood up, ready to leave his dorm. he quickly wiped his tears upon realising that yn was leaving. “w-wait. take this. it was meant for you anyways. open it when you arrive safely at your dorm.” he handed a big shopping bag to her before hugging her one last time. “i love you.” riki whispers, “i’ll always love you, yn. take care my love.”

xii.

riki was upset. he had every right to be. he had worked so hard for so many years in hopes of filling in the void yn’s parents never did, but yet he failed. he had taken a week off school, reassuring the lecturers that it was due to an emergency when it was really just an excuse for him to cry all week. he stared at the many portraits he had drawn of yn over the years as well as the many photographs he hung of the couple together in his dorms. everything reminded him of her and it hurts him more than he thinks it should. “riki ? thank god you answered. i’m really sorry she saw those photos… i was a fool for not getting a camera myself for the photoshoot. i’ll explain it to yn, i promise. i can’t sit around and do nothing knowing how much damage i caused.” “heeseung. it’s fine. really. it’s not your fault. i was a bad boyfriend to yn. that’s why she broke up with me. i’m sorry i can’t help any of you out with your latest project. i need some time alone.” his voice was scratchy and hoarse from all crying. “that should be the least of your worries right now. have a good break, don’t do anything foolish , okay ?… i’ll let jay know as well.” “thanks.” throwing his phone across the room, he took his keys and headed straight out of the dorm.

riki walked and walked and walked. he walked in the dark night, walked past hundreds of strangers and kept walking until he reached his destination. unlocking the door, he collapsed onto his knees. he was finally at the place he spent three years (almost four) working on, his very own apartment that was meant to be shared with his now ex girlfriend. ever since he met yn, he knew that she was the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with and so he decided that on their fifth anniversary, he would surprise her with their very own apartment and so he started working throughout his highschool days all while keeping it a secret. he would help choreograph some dances on saturday mornings for money, telling yn that he was busy with physical training for his extra curriculums. on mondays, he would lie about having make up football practice when he was really modelling. riki would even skip some meals to save as much as he can for the apartment, only willingly spending money when it comes to yn herself. it took riki two years and a half to be able to buy a nice cosy little apartment (with the help of his parents of course) and he has been decorating it in secret as much as he can with his spare change. riki walked around the apartment, slowly feeling his tears welling up again. he had decorated it exactly how she would describe her future house to be. a soft, fluffy white rug sitting below the sleek khaki couch and a marble table. a walk in closet with a large vanity table and a white center table for accessories display. a master bedroom with a king sized bed, a bed side table and the lamp from ikea that yn couldn’t stop raving about. the extra bedroom that was turned into a studio for the both of them. the storage room he filled with shelves to give her space to store the cloths she needs for her designs. the half decorated balcony. riki did everything he could for her and it wasn’t enough for her to feel loved. he sprawled all over the floor, making no plans to get up from the position he was now in as tears flowed down once again.

as she left riki’s dorm, yn mentally cursed herself for letting the one last thing that was good in her life go. she was now back to square one where it was just her against the cruel world. she had been dying to open the shopping bag riki gave but decided against looking into it until she had reached her room. yn thinks she had cried enough that day. she thinks she cried so much there weren’t possibly any tears left. oh how wrong she was. once yn was back in the comforts of her bed, she took a deep breath in and opened the bag. inside sat the airpods headphones she had asked from him the other day, a prada handbag, a bouquet of flowers as well as two tickets to the museum showcasing the works of her favourite artist of all time. the tears flowed endlessly. riki had given everything yn asked for in the promised amount of time. “yn, are you okay ? i heard you sobbing.” minhee said from outside the door. “min… i think i fucked up…”she wailed even harder. “shit. stay there, i’ll call ju over and get you some ice cream.”

and so, another impromptu girls’ night occurred. “i shouldn’t have broken up with riki… he did everything i told him to do… what if those pictures were a misunderstanding ? he never lied to me before….” yuju sighed, “yn, there’s always a first time to everything. you saw it with your own eyes, the way he was interacting with the girls in the pictures intimately. the buying of luxury items were probably all a facade to keep you around. don’t cave so quickly. you should block him.” she snatched yn’s phone from her hand, pressing into riki’s contact and blocking him everywhere.

xiii.

a week apart turned into a month. riki’s current mental state did not make any progress ever since he let go of the love of his life. the sweet whisperings of “i love you” played in his mind like a broken record. although he most definitely wasn’t in his best condition, he’d rather spend his waking hours worrying about yn. did she eat well ? was she able to have a home cooked meal within the month ? was her classes too hard on her ? did she go to the museum with the tickets ? he had hoped she did, he wouldn’t wish for her to miss out on that rare opportunity that barely even came by. he camped at the ticketing website till dawn for a chance to get the tickets which quickly sold out subsequently. riki would be lying if he said he never tried to reach out to yn, but his efforts all lead to fruitless outcomes. it didn’t take long for him to realise he was blocked on all socials. that’s when he remembered, yuju had given him a way of contact. “hey, um this is riki. i was just calling because i was worried about yn… how is she ? is she doing okay ? i haven’t been able to reach her. please cook her some homemade dishes once in a while, i think she would love that. please let her know that im waiting for her as well…” “nishimura, yn is doing just fine. she isn’t at the dorm right now because she’s out on a group date… minhee tried to get her to meet new people so she would feel slightly better. i think she blocked you, so it might be a little hard to contact her. if you’d like, you can come over now and talk to her once she returns ?”

at that very moment, it felt like yuju was his knight in shinning armour, “yeah. that’ll be great. i’ll be there in ten. ”

taking a deep breath, he knocked on the door to the girls’ dorm. “it’s open !” yuju shouted, prompting for him to enter on his own. riki sat awkwardly on the sofa, waiting for yn’s return. “don’t be so awkward. i know you haven’t been here in awhile but a lot of things haven’t changed you know.” yuju placed a glass of water in front of the boy. “yn… you mentioned she is meeting others now… romantically ?” the girl nodded in response. “i see… i hope the guy is able to treat her better than i can…” he sighed. it’s been a month but the wound was still fresh. “don’t be like that, riki. you were a great boyfriend to her. i’m not sure what exactly changed her mind that much but you’re the most ideal boyfriend i’ve ever seen. don’t doubt you capability to love. “ she placed her hand over his. riki would be lying if he said he wasn’t taken aback. first, his girlfriend of many years broke up with him, then he contacted his ex’s friend like it was nothing and now her hands are on his as if it was only natural that happened. “fuck it, yuju. you don’t understand how much i loved her. how much i still love her. i’ll keep changing and working on myself if i have too, i just want her back. i’ll buy her the whole world even if it means i have to sacrifice myself. she’s my lifeline.” he threw his head back in frustration. “riki, you’re too nice. she doesn’t deserve you or the effort you put in for her. for your sake, please. move on. you can get any girl you want on this planet so don’t dwell on her. there’s so many single people on this earth like me. yn isn’t special.” riki scoffed, “she isn’t special to you but she is to me. and for the record, i’m not looking for anyone else, i’m only looking to win yn back. “

the door unlocked to a figure of yn standing there dressed in something considered pretty. “w-why are you here ?” yn stuttered. “yn, love please hear me out. please. just once. “ riki’s eyes teared up at the sight of his previous lover. “riki, i’m not your love anymore. please leave… i’m not ready to deal with any of this yet. ju, please walk him out…” yuju nodded, grabbing ahold of his hand and walking him towards the door. upon closing the door behind them, riki fell to the ground - huddling his knees as his sob the pain away. “i-i fucked up real bad this time… didn’t i ?” “no riki, she’s just being selfish. i’ll try to talk to her about this. i honestly still have no idea how or why you guys broke up but if you could give me a clearer picture that would aid me a lot.” she patted his head softly. “i… don’t want to talk about it in public.” riki sighs, “what if we talk about it at your dorm ? would you be alright with that ?” yuju suggested. “it doesn’t really matter to me.”

xiv.

the talk lasted way longer than riki would’ve expected. by the time he was back from the washroom, yuju had already fallen asleep on his couch. he stared at her face for a few moments before leaving the room, only to return with a blanket - placing it over her body. a smile spread across her face without him knowing.

time flies when you’re having fun - so the night went by really quickly as yuju replayed the scene of riki placing the blanket on her non stop. she made a note to wake up early and prepare breakfast for the other to show her worth. “morning riki. have some breakfast before i leave. i remember hearing that you like having cereal and milk for breakfast. i got them all ready.” he muttered a quick thanks in reply before sitting down quietly across her - clearly with no intentions of talking about what had happened last night.

and these moments soon grew to happen from once a week to almost every 2 working days, where riki would randomly walk into his dorm to see a drunk yuju crying about wanting some boy that didn’t seem the least bit interested in her. he had grown accustomed to her but still occasionally wishes for yn to be back in his warmth. how he wished he could ask her what to do. when yuju woke up the next morning, it was almost as if she had never crashed at his place at all, she looked prim and proper. “hey rik, i’ve been dying to know what’s in that brown box. it’s been sitting there for ages, it’s collecting dust at this point. can i open it ?” before riki could even stop her, her hands reached for the lid and her eyes widened as she took in everything. countless of pictures of yn and riki were scattered across the insides of the box as well as every single thing yn gave that could possibly fit in that box. “what the actual fuck. you aren’t even together with her anymore, move on ! you need to get rid of this. “ she snatched a polaroid of the couple and scoffed. “look yuju, in the nicest way possible, fuck off. how long i take to move on isn’t something you can control. hell, i still have feelings for yn, okay ? i would run to her the moment she calls. i’m not throwing ANY of this away.” “are you fucking insane ? i worked so hard to get you to leave and you’re still so stubborn. you’re a fool, riki. i fucking love you and you won’t even see it. how selfish. “

confusion was plastered all across riki’s face, then anger. “what the fuck do you mean when you said you worked hard to get ME to leave.” the silence thickened. “you fucking bitch, you sabotaged my relationship, didn’t you ? oh my god you’re a horrible friend. get out. NOW !” he grabbed her hand, pulling her towards the door and pushing yuju out the door. riki fell to the ground in horror. everything made sense now. the sudden change in yn’s behaviour. the sudden requests that never seemed as important previously. the breakup. because of yuju, he lost the love of his life. because of yuju, the couple had to suffer. because of yuju, he could only play the “i love you”s from yn in his head like a broken record and no longer hear it in person.

riki could sit here and pray for yuju’s downfall, but he wasn’t going to do that. riki was hellbent on winning yn back, and this time no amount of sabotage could stop him.

xv.

maybe some things are easier said than done. winning yn back was definitely one of the case for riki. she was avoiding him like the plague, leaving him defeated on a daily basis. “i’ll try again tomorrow.” and yet tomorrow came and went by with another failed attempt. feeling defeated, riki went to the cafe he once spent 3 hours queueing for to get a breath of fresh air. poking at the cake he remembered buying for yn, he sighed. “can i get an americano a-and a slice of that famous strawberry cake.” riki’s head instantly turned towards the direction of the voice, only to find the familiar face of the owner with tear stains on her cheeks. “yn…” he waited for her to grab her items before making his way towards her. “yn. please. i need to talk to you.” tears rolled down her face once again.

“fuck off, riki. why can’t you leave me alone ? or anyone acquainted to me alone ? you’re even going for yuju now ? are you kidding me ?” “im not going after yuju. i have no interest in her.” “that does not explain why she has the polaroid you took of us. why are you even lying ? what’s the point ?” riki was shocked at how much the love of his life has changed. the girl that was once a sweet angel seemed to be lost somewhere. “yn, she stole that from me the moment i found out she sabotaged our relationship.” “now you’re accusing my friend of things she didn’t do ?” “if i play an audio recording for you, would you believe me then ? i have no reason to lie to you, yn. i have no interest in any other girls either. i made a promise to the gods that you would be my first and only love and im not breaking that. “ pressing the play button on his phone, riki handed it to yn as the audio sounded.

“o-oh my god… this can’t be real.” “it is. i didn’t think they were very good friends in the first place but what yuju did really crossed the line.” “riki… what do i do ? i literally live with them.” she placed her head in her palms, sobbing. “i have an apartment.” “what ?” “i bought that apartment for us a few years back. it was supposed to be a gift for our fifth anniversary… you can stay there, at least until we figure out what to do with yuju and minhee. i don’t think you should be around them for a while. just pack your stuff and i’ll… text you the address… if you could just unblock me somewhere…”

xvi.

as promised, riki gave her the address and helped her move in. “i told them my parents wanted me to move back into their homes and they looked… happy.” riki reached his hands out, ready to give her a hug only to stop midway, remembering the status of their relationship. “i think you’d want to be alone for a while, to think through everything. i won’t be staying here, so you don’t have to worry. you can sleep in the master bedroom, the studio would be on your right and the toilet is down the hallway. the walk in closet is next to the master bedroom. you can keep your cloths for your projects in the storage room on the left of the studio. i’ll drop by once in a while to give you microwaveable food in case i can’t cook for you that day. you don’t have to worry about the groceries or bills. i got them covered. just rest well.” “riki. thank you. let’s talk at the end of the week.” he nodded in response.

a week went by just like that. riki would be lying if he said he wasnt anxious about what was to come next. ever since their break up, it was almost as if he had lost his sense of direction. he had to start all over again and with yuju’s constant intervention, it wasn’t the easiest thing for him to do. this week was no different, yuju constantly trying to apologise to him for her outburst - blaming it on yn. “rik. yn is out of the picture now ! she doesn’t even stay at our dorm anymore. we can be together.” pure disgust plastered all across riki’s face. “you’re seriously deluded. get help.” and with that, he walked away.

the sun had already set by the time riki had reached the apartment yn currently resided in. knocking on the door as a heads up, he entered to find yn preparing some wine for the both of them. “let’s chat in the bedroom.” riki sat on the bed awkwardly across his ex. “what… do you want to know ?” “truthfully… everything. i want to know how you got the money to buy this place… why there were girls in your camera… why yuju would do such a thing…why you’re still helping me… i want to know it all.” riki took a sip of the wine. “well for starters… i have been working since high school. i worked as a choreographer at my parents’ studio and did modelling as well. like i said, this was supposed to be a five year anniversary gift to you… so i spent the past few years decorating it secretly. that’s what the secret bank account was for and why i refused to touch it… as for the camera… when you said you wanted all those gifts, i started working as a photographer for heeseung and choreographer at the studio again. additionally, jay offered for me to model for his gender neutral fashion line, hence there were girls in the photos with me. they paid me enough to get everything you wanted as well as get some more stuff to decorate this place…yuju… she’s fucked up. apparently she liked me and i only found out when she admitted that she sabotaged our relationship to get together with me. she’s been preying on your insecurities and i’m so sorry i couldn’t stop her in time… i’m helping you because of my promise. my promise that you’ll be my only love in this life. you can break me a hundred times and i’ll still go back to you. i’ll wait for you until you become mine again and even if you don’t, i’ll still wait for you.” yn was crying again. “oh my god i was such an asshole to you…” riki chuckled softly, wiping the tears away from her face. “yeah… but still, i prefer hearing your voice in person than to only be able to hear your voice play in my head like a broken record.” “what do i do now… i’m still going to run into them in class. i can’t avoid then forever and they’re literally the only friends i have. yuju is going to be pissed if she finds out i’m staying in this apartment that YOU bought.” “you can’t avoid them in class but you can make new friends. i know its a little hard for you but i recently found out that sunoo’s girlfriend is in the same class as you. i can get her to help you out. i know you want to make friends on your own so just take this as you meeting her on your own through mutuals ! don’t discredit yourself. if they do anything to you, gather enough evidence and we can submit it to the school committee. the committee might reassign you to a new dorm but if you want to continue staying here, feel free to.” “okay. i want to meet sunoo’s girlfriend. i’m free the day after.”

xvii.

“hi yn ! i’m ryeji, sunoo’s girlfriend and your classmate ! riki told me about what happened. so i’m more than willing to lend you a hand !” seeing her bubbly personality definitely eased yn’s nerves. “riki really does have a pretty girlfriend…” the girl whispered under her breath. “o-oh i’m not his girlfriend… anymore.” “ah ! then you must be the girl riki swore to only love !”

“how was the meeting with ryeji ?” riki asked. “she’s a lot nicer than my previous friends. she said she’ll help me out if they ever approach me.” “that’s great. i’m glad things worked out with her. here. it’s a new bag.” he pushed a chanel gift bag towards her. “riki… about what i said last time… i didn’t really mean it. it’s just that… yuju convinced me that you didn’t love me because you didn’t do what my parents did… i’m really sorry i accused you of such things.” riki gave her a tiny smile before pulling her into a hug. “i know. i’m not mad at you for saying such things. i guess i should pamper you occasionally as well. i don’t think any amount of handbags could be worth as much as my love for you back then and now. don’t be sorry about the past, be happy you were able to realise what you truly want. it’s perfect alright if i’m not what you want. i’ll be happy as long as you’re happy.” he rubs yn’s back slowly. “well, i want you back. i’ll court you this time ! you did everything for me back then and now it’s my turn to return the favour. i want to be the best girlfriend ever ! “

xviii.

riki woke up to his doorbell ringing, his disheveled hair and confused face clearly showing the state the boy was in. swinging open the door, he was met with a smiley yn with two bottles of banana milk in her hands, “morning ! it’s my first day of courting you so i wanted to walk with you to school ! you always walk me to school so i thought we could change it a little.” pulling her in before closing the door behind her, he led her to the couch - head on her thighs, eyes on her face. “hehe, good morning yn. now that you’re here, i don’t want to go to school anymore.” she dragged him by the arm towards the bathroom, “go get ready for school. we can always hang out after ! my submissions are finally over.”

the two walked to school, just like they used to - but this time earning more stares and whispers due to their previous breakup. “this is my lecture hall. i’ll see you after my class ends ! i’ll think of you !” yn gives riki a cheeky smile before sliding a chocolate bar into his arms. his favourite. “yn, you’re here !” ryeji called out to the girl, signalling for her to leave riki’s side. “have a nice time in class, call me if anything happens !” riki shouted after the girl.

“i see you’re back with riki ?” ryeji wiggled her eyebrows, “not exactly yet. im courting him this time. it’s my way of saying sorry for everything i guess.” the other girl cooed at her response. “my favourite love birds.” “love birds ?” yuju slammed her hand onto the table. “you bitch ! he was courting me and you stole him away like that ? just as easily as you threw him away ? who was there for you when you were crying your eyes out ? me ! and who was there for riki when you dumped him over YOUR insecurities ? me ! stop being a pick me bitch yn. quit being so selfish.” ryeji threw her pencil case at yuju’s face. “shut it, you witch.” “OH. and it seems like you got a new friend too. let’s see what happens when she finds out your secrets. how everyone’s view of you would change.” lifting her feet to place them on the table, above yuju’s hands, yn laughed. “tell them. or should i tell them myself ? riki told me everything you did to sabotage our relationship. and i believe you have a polaroid that belongs to US.” snatching her wallet, yn reached for the polaroid. “oh and you can stop chasing riki now. he is everything but impressed by your shenanigans. in fact, he had enough evidence to file a case against you to the school committee so i highly suggest you STOP messing with people around me. or i’ll mess with you.” the room went pin drop silent. yuju kicked the table in defeat before walking out of the door, too embarrassed to sit through class. yn heaved a sigh of relief, “you did great, yn.” ryeji assured.

xix.

sitting across riki in the restaurant was yn in a beautiful dress. “i don’t think yuju or minhee would be bothering us any time in the future.” “that’s great. i’m proud of you for standing up for yourself. “ riki’s hands reach for yn’s cheeks, caressing them slowly. “i also got something for you !” pushing a bag towards him, she flashed him her signature smile. “it’s something i made during class ! one of the professors said that i should start a clothing line and my connections would be able to boost it. so i decided you should get my very first piece. you can even model for the line if you like and i would love for you to design the logo !” opening the bag, riki found the most beautiful piece of clothing he has ever since, tailored to make his body features stand out even more than they already did. “you don’t understand how much i love this. thank you so much, yn. i appreciate it. truly. i can’t ever thank you enough.” “well, you can thank me by being mine again. what do you say, love ?” “of course ! it would be an honor to be yours again.” the two reconciled in a hug, “ i love you.” riki whispers.

—

taglist ! @hafsa-hoofsa-heefs @hiqhkey @enfinitystansenhypen

permanent taglist ! still open ! @soobin-chois @aksemy @ja4hyvn @enhacolor @abdiitcryy @ahnneyong @jungwonsgfnameyukie @stepout-09-15 @llllllllama @mafukissu @loveliii @vieniee @curly-fr13s @officiallyjaehyuns @ixomiyu @luva1y @pkjay @txtbrainrot @xiaoderrrr @jhopesucker @haknom

[mulberry-leaves-yearn-for-envy]

Prompt Submission by @yiling-laozu-is-loml

Mingxian Prompt - No war AU. Instead of GusuLan, QingheNie hosts guests lectures

CANON SOURCE: Please only use novel and donghua as source material and avoid everything that has to do with untamed/cql. For appearances and outfits, please refer to the donghua.

Bottom Wei Wuxian only please! the number of children they have depends on you but I'd love it if they had at least 2!

No War AU. Instead of Gusulan lectures, QingheNie hosts guest lectures open to everyone, not just sect-allied cultivators but also rogue ones. Rogue cultivator Wei Wuxian decides to chance his luck and maybe learn a few new tricks and sabre wielding but mostly, he goes to confirm rumours about Nie Mingjue's skill, height, attitude, etc (basically to gawk like the gay man he doesnt know he is yet). The way he treats Nie Mingjue (the martial arts and saber instructor) is a mix of how he treats Lan Wangji and Lan Qiren in canon. He flirts and teases and tries to get kicked out and Nie Mingjue keeps him just to outstubborn him and show him his playground bully bullshit wont work on him. Wei Wuxian's parents are alive but he left them to rogue cultivate on his own and make his own name with his inventions and talisman. How they fall in love, have sex and marry is up to you as are the ages. I'd just like for Nie Mingjue to be older, if only by a few years. Feel free to add anything to the plot!

Oh and Wei Wuxian definitely calls him "A-Jue" because I am a sucker for this. What Nie Mingjue calls him is up to you!

Do Not Wants: Nie Mingjue to have been in a past serious relationship, still having sex with someone else in the fic, children from other partners (as in, Wei Wuxian is the only real serious commitment), miscarriage and unhappy ending. If you put Jiang Clan in the fic, please ensure they either have bare-minimum interactions with wei wuxian, are operating in the background and have no plot-related things OR outright Jiang clan bashing. I dont want JC/WWX reconciliation, nor do I wanna see Jiang clan positively please.

If you need help with brainstorming, hmu! And definitely lmk if anyone(s) writes this because I'd wanna feast my soul on this for sure!

[lizzyaka]

Theory Anon here again! Oh man lol I didn't even remember Henry was sick at all in Italy! It's def been a few years since I read the book, so take everything I think w/ a MASSIVE grain of salt, a whole salt lamp even SO IIRC, Henry and Bunny were childhood friends, weren't they? Or at least, they knew each other longer than the other's in the group knew one another I think? So there's like, an added layer of intimacy between them, so maybe during that time Henry had more resentment for him building up, constantly wanting Bunny OUT of his life but never really getting a well-looked upon chance to do so, but after having killed the farmer it was like, once that door was opened he couldn't shut it again, "Murder is OK!" Henry Winters lol, and maybe he needed Bunny to find the journal so he could tell the /other's/ that Bunny now 100% knows about the murder and they need to get rid of him, which gets them on his side and gets their support to do so ? [insert thinking emoji here], and also tysm for your thoughts and details on the matter too ! I've always wanted to yammer about this w/ someone but never knew anyone else who liked THS ! {and was as real abt it as you are LOL}

TY FOR THESE ASKS OMGG i love talking abt this book. I giggled at the last sentence im sooo annoying abt tshLMAO.

(Unimportant detail but they weren't childhood friends they met in college bc they were roomates their freshman year)

I was always intrigued by their relationship because everyone who knew them always said they were best friends, and bunny was the closest person to henry and the only one who could make him laugh etc. yet henry always seemed so annoyed with bunny and i did consider there being resentment on henrys part but i came to the conclusion that hes just weird like that. I have seen multiple people say the same as u so maybe im in the wrong here! its just the way i interpreted it

I wholeheartedly believe that the others would have followed along with anything henry said (i think this mainly because thats exactly what they did LMAO) and henry knew this so i dont really see him orchestrating something like this just to convince them bc it wasnt necessary. henry had them in the palm of his hand and he was aware of this fact

I also think that while henry wasnt morally opposed to these murders (and he did feel some sick morbid excitement at carrying them out) he didnt WANT to kill bunny but rather did it because he was an inconvenience and to him it seemed like the best course of action.

I like what you said about the door being open and not being able to shut it again because i do think thats pretty much what happened. Henry said he felt alive for the first time after the events of the bacchanal and he definitely kept seeking that thrill but i think its more a matter of him playing god than not liking bunny (and i do think he cared about bunny)

i love reading your submissions <3 this is all just my opinion and my interpretation btwww ur more than free to disagree! Id love to hear what u think about everything i said + if u have anything else to add

[cherrycokedup]

i need liked posts to be turned off on tumblr guys i dont need to see that my mutal liked the post "getting FREAKAY in the freak room part five million" like im happy you have hobbies. hobbies are great actually! just. i dont wanna see it, its like getting a cruel vision from the lord above of what your friend is doing at any given moment and it's like the deepest privaacy violation ever. it's like if i was walking down the halls of school and a random person walked up to me and shoved a photo in my face of someone having a moment. like good for them, really, but also i dont think i was authorized to see this information and i dont really thing i wanted to see this information. i feel like some type of wild ass archive of all the sins of my mutals because obviously im not gonna walk up to their dms and be like "hello kind and beloved friend, how was your binge on lego ninjago dick sucking?" because that is insane. how am i supposed to kindly tell me friends that their tumblr is backstabbing them and showing all their muatals their liked posts unprovoked on my dashboard. yknow what is my worst nightmare to see? " liked by --" sometimes it is good and a fine post, and i can like it too. i like it when you can share in our liking and not reblogging! but too many times it has me learning something i dont think i really needed to know. and who knows. maybe i did need to know. maybe the reason tumblr is showing me that my friends are liking "𝖂𝖍𝖆𝖙 𝖎𝖋 𝖞𝖔𝖚 𝖜𝖊𝖗𝖊 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖙𝖗𝖚𝖓𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖇𝖚𝖑𝖑𝖘 𝖋𝖆𝖛𝖔𝖗𝖎𝖙𝖊?" is because it is trying to broaden my horizens, it is trying to show me a whole new world of debachery. which sure, introduce me away but i am like not very open to this because you opened the introducion with "you know what your friend of three years that you just helped write a college submission essay has been really into lately?" like i know they have been into spreading love and joy and kindness. i know they have been into their stardew farm. i know they have been into getting a job. and yet there is more horror to come. you know what REALLY horrifes me about this tumblr feature? it's the idea that tumblr might be snitching on ME. it fills me with all the fear of someone who did not pack a bomb going through airport security. because what if once in 2018 i did pack a bomb and now tumblr is coming onto my friend's dashes with a creepy grin, waving around a screenshot of me packing a bomb and going "LOOKY, LOOKY HERE. LITTLE FUCKING SLUTTY BITCH WHORE OF THE CENTURY LIKED AN EMBARSSING FANDOM SEX POST FOURTEEN YEARS AGO." except it would not give them the timestamp. for all my friends would know, i liked that post today. everyday i check that my liked posts are still private. everyday i go into my tumblr settings and make sure that the "share your liked posts!" switch is off, like im the guy who has the watch the nucular reactor radar but on a far more worst and catastrophic level. i feel like the last one of my seer kind, unable to forget or turn off my wretched visions, and I cannot tell any of them for they would not understand so it is my curse to bare alone, until I die out. It is my curse to know that some people in the world, some people who i look upon with all the fondness in the world, people I would save over myself in a heartbeat if it came down to us standing at the end of the world and there is only enough room in the saftey shuttle for one more person, it is my curse, and mine along to bare knowing that that person liked a post of Jack in the Box mascot having his bare ass cheeks on display for the rest of the world. If there is a way to be done with this torment, I do not know. I have scoured the settings and the only option i can find is to hide my own likes, and hope any sins of my long forgotten past will stay locked in a vault so deep even I can't dig them out, even I can't remember what they once were.

[chronicler-of-narrative]

*Insert obvious flashing spoiler warning for Edgerunners*

Ok, its only been like less than a month since i finished Edgrunners and I have not had the chance to play the game and only know things about it from a couple youtube videos and cultural osmosis so...Im gonna tell you my theory (thats definitely not just my hidden copium) and *how* David survived the ending of Edgerunners and why I think the story of the anime isn't done.

Disclaimer: this was written late at night and while tired. So take my assessment with a grain of salt and be sure to correct me in the notes

Ill start off by mentioning a pattern ive noticed that may be completely wrong but may also be invaluable to understanding the storytelling of Edgerunners and probably Cyberpunk as a whole: Death as an ending.

Now, that is a very obvious storytelling trope. Character finished their arc? Kill them, and all that. But imo death in Cyberpunk IS the end of a characters arc. David's mom dies moments after completely explaining her hopes for David? End of her arc because it serves to set a baseline, a goal David had pushed onto him that then serves as a payoff later on the series. Same applies to the gang, and while my memories of the middle few episodes are admittedly fuzzy, it is my belief that they all died in some way befitting their character: For example Rebecca and Pillar, characters who are very obviously crazy and to some exend hedonistic, don't die in some glamorous way, but rather are both killed by one, violent and most importantly empty action. A complete rejection of their flair, an anticlimactic end. The point im trying to make here is that death, in Cyberpunk, is played off as a subversion of ones goals but simultaneously as a fulfilment of their arc/purpose.

Now David's death seemingly fills that niche, right? In one way or another, he fulfilled the expectations set on him by everyone around him and himself. He saved Lucy, made it to the top of Arasaka Tower, right? And yet, curiously, to borrow a detail spotted by a probably fairly well known theory video on the idea that David did survive, but we never get to see David die. We see him being aimed at by Smasher in a moment reminscent of the first shot with the washing machine, and then we get a bloody transition. We dont see his corpse. Now, even if i personally do subscribe to this theory, i wanna mention the parallel that caught my eye during the scene: Why exactly is it, and frankly why do we even start, with the washing machine? I feel like the answer is fairly simple, actually: It shows us how David is bent to wills of the corporations. From being denied his clean uniform by the washing machine to getting stared down by Arasaka's most prized asset, he starts and ends in submission to the corporate rule of Night City. Now, if I may stretch this out even further, what if in a way, his death represents the washing cycle of his uniform?

Now, this sounds batshit insane, and it probably is, but hear me out. What if the reason its a washing machine is because it shows the beginning of David's cycle of being 'cleaned' into a corpo, the one that ends up interrupted by the lack of funds. And what if, despite how he apparently dies, that shot might be representing his cycle being...complete?

So, to kinda cut down on all of this yapping, let me make my main thesis clear: the protagonist of Cyberpunk Edgerunners did die, but it was not David Martinez that died, but rather, *David*.

What I mean by this is what if his death was real...But metaphorical? What if he didn't die physically, but the part of him that opposed Arasaka, the punk that didn't fit into the academy, died?

Now, at the end of the series, Adam Smasher is alive and well, and yet in 2077, we kill him. Now, I don't know the context on his dynamic with V and how narratively his death happens, but I do known hes dead. This to me, creates a vacuum. A vacuum that, a game with a clear message about the futility of trying to change the rule of the corpos, should logistically be filled right? And while yes, I am suggest David will take Adam Smashers place, I do wanna explain why it happens.

Now, one thing about David is that he's special. Its a very reccuring motif im the entire show, and one that seemingly doesnt go anywhere since he ends up getting destroyed by the even more special Smasher. But what if, hear me out, that idea of being special had a different use: What if it is used as a framing device (especially given David and Ripperdoc have a conversation ABOUT Smasher) that means to frame David as being similar to Smasher. As being his equal in specialness. What if thats the whole reason its not Max-Tak that ends up killing the cyberpsychosis afflicted David, but Smasher. A sort of "you and me are not so different" moment that supposedly shows Smasher triumphing over David. Now, it could just be that David was enough of a threat to Arasaka that called in the big guns, but then again, if he was, why would Smasher wipe the floor with him? If David was as much of a problem as he's made out to be, wouldn't he be able to hold his own against Smasher, even for a little bit? But no, Smasher demolishes him, completely and utterly. And thus I believe this was all Arasakas plan. To see how suitable of a replacement David is for Smasher. And the reason we only hear whispers of David in 2077? Because hes locked away in some Arasaka facility, being worked on to surpass Smasher and potentially even become a threat to V, considering they seemingly have no issue with killing this supposedly super strong cyborg.

So yea, Tldr: David only died metaphorically, he could potentially come back as a Smasher 2.0 in a sequel to either the game or the anime.

If i got this all completely wrong, do not hesistate to roast me in the notes. If I think of any additions the next time im online, ill make sure to add it as a reblog.

[mooodyblue]

you dont have to write this if you aren't comfortable, but could i request austin x elvis with sub!e? it can be about anything you want, but i just need a shy, submissive e and austin 🩷

me: has requests from a month ago

also me: okay let me write this request i got in the middle of the night

ty for the request 🫶🏼 u know i love these two

warnings: austin x elvis, nsfw mdni 18+, handjobs, sub!elvis

wc: 651

“this is so stupid….”

elvis was fully red, inches away from austin’s face. they'd given up on the movie in front of them. austin got a little too handsy with elvis, rubbing all over his shoulders and at his back. he convinced himself he was getting all warm and tingly due to not being touched in awhile, but there was something so intoxicating about austin's touch that made it so different.

he couldn't take it anymore, finally backing away before the feelings caught up to…other parts of his body. “jesus, austin. why don't ya just kiss me at this point?”

“okay.” he shrugged.

elvis cursed himself for making such a stupid joke. but austin’s lips looked so fluffy, pink and begging to be kissed.

austin scooted himself slightly closer and rested a hand against his jaw, pressing his lips against elvis's. the books were right, it was just like kissing a marshmallow. a sweet, fluffy marshmallow, the faint taste of coke on his lips from earlier. elvis kissed back experimentally, head swirling with thoughts he for sure shouldn't be having. “i-i can't.” he pulled away, moving farther away from austin and crossing his legs, tossing a pillow over his lap and hugging it.

“you didn’t like it?” he frowned.

“no..no. i-i did–well. i-i don’t know.” he stammered, blushing and looking down.

he was so fidgety, unable to sit still. austin surveyed the man in front of him, a small smirk forming on his face. “move the pillow.”

his eyes widened, shaking his head. “nuh-uh.”

“c'mon baby, don’t you wanna feel better?”

“austin.” he said sternly, “don’t.”

austin moved closer to elvis, “at least let me see it.”

he gulped, slowly pushing the pillow off his lap. the outline of his cock tented against his pants, begging to be freed. he was almost ashamed at how hard he was, just from a small kiss alone. he ached badly.

“now, what should we do about this yittle problem….” he cooed, tracing the outline with his fingertip. he grinned at the soft twitch, circling the sensitive tip through his pants. “feel good?”

“mmhm…” elvis hummed. “w-wanna….”

“so needy.” he ran his hand across the tent, giving elvis a gentle squeeze and getting a soft whimper in response. “lift your hips, baby.” he unzipped his pants, pulling them slightly down his hips to pull out elvis’s cock, throbbing in his hand. he started pumping him slowly, the small whimpers leaving elvis’s lips becoming music to his ears.

“aus–” he panted. “please, i-i can't–”

austin tsk’d, his finger grazing the tip of his cock. “not yet.” he used the precum to add extra slick, pumping him faster. “such a pretty lil’ cock, been hidin’ him from me? such a shame–nope, don't cum yet.”

his hips buckled against austin’s hand, “fuck, i-i gotta…”

“no swearing, good boys don't swear.” elvis’s hand gripped on the arm of the sofa, chest heaving as he felt himself get closer and closer. “no cumin', bad boys don't get to cum. i know you’ve been sneaking off to your room ‘n touchin’ yourself. thinking of me? i hear you moanin’ my name in the middle of the night.”

despite all efforts to stop his own orgasm, he couldn't fight it. elvis tossed his head back and moaned loudly, spurting all over austin’s hand with the shout of his name. the sight alone almost made him cum in his own pants, the sight of elvis blissed out with haze in his eyes driving him mad. “thought i said you couldn't cum….”

elvis let out a shaky breath, raising his head and catching his breath. “‘m sorry…i j-just couldn’-”

austin licked the cum off his fingers, licking his own hand clean. he hummed and stood up from the couch, unbuckling and zipping down his own pants as he moved to stand in front of elvis. “think it’s time for your punishment, baby boy.”

[macncherries]

am i the only one that thinks its crazy when women target popular gay men (or gay/ace/aro insinuated) men with romantic language? because to me its more of a realization that that person loves that character a lot and yet has absolutely no grasp on them as a person or concept. like, im not judging you, because thats your babygirl or whatever, but youve just twisted the image of that babygirl to fit your own notion; its no longer that same character/person anymore.

a lot of this was brought on by a Troye Sivan & Charlie xcx concert i went to a few days ago. there was a girl behind us screaming "thats my husband!" and other various romantically charged quips at him. which i never understood. why are you here? you cant not know that hes gay. if youre attending a concert of his, and comfortable enough to state hes your husband, you have to know hes gay. so why do it? am i taking this too literally? is it just one of those things that "people just say" and there is no deeper meaning behind it? the whole time i couldnt help but to think "girl, you are barking up the wrong tree" which was ironic because i think during "Rush" she was growling and barking at him as well. Also, side note, i love Rush's music video a lot.

this is a lot longer than i thought it would be. more below.

ever since then i realize that the same thing happens very frequently with fictional characters as well. I guess it just depends what fandom im in at the time, but obviously right now dungeon meshi is taking over my frontal cortex like spreading necrotic tissue. Laios specifically, people seem to do similar things with him. i think its because hes relatively 'malleable' as a character— hes easy to project onto and thus easy to mischaracterize. theres also a common theme with him being portrayed as puppy/dog-like and needy and whiny and stuff like that. this is more so in suggestive content. Im not disagreeing with that opinion; honestly i kind of like it, but thats another contribution as to why i think people choose him for the same kind of stuff. I will often see women or very fem-leaning folks hone in on Laios, romantically. And use the same kind of language. "thats my man!" "thats my husband!" "hes so mine" etc. Things that lay romantic ownership. and again, every time i see it, i cant help but to think "girl, you are barking up the wrong tree"

then again, self-ship has always been a little lost on me, so maybe thats where im not understanding. I dont dislike people who do it and i dont dislike it as a concept, i just dont understand why you would use that kind of language with a person who would realistically never be romantically interested in your gender. Obviously, Laios isnt canonically gay, but its highly insinuated he is both queer and autistic. and a lot of people who use the aforementioned language are, in turn, mischaracterizing him. Or at the very least ignorant to his coding and nuance within the character. This ties into the whole puppy/neediness thing earlier. The autism is translated into "dumb" to them, because they want to see the submissive behavior of a male character. Thats a whole different debacle. Im very tired of people categorizing Laios as 'dumb' as a general statement.

I think its still much more acceptable thing to do overall on Laios than it is Troye Sivan though. Doing that to a real person is much much weirder.

I also understand that the point of self-ship isnt necessarily to be realistic, that its more of a comfort thing, but doesnt that also kind of take you out of it? Like, every time i get romantically attached to a character romantically, its out of realism. As in, i would be at least somewhat attracted to them in real life. And inversely they would at least not categorically deny me outright. Getting attached purely sexually to a character is a bit different. And im guilty of being led by my dick to completely unrealistic characters. But im not talking about those, because the people who do this make use of both romantic and sexual language. So its not just a led-by-the-dick thing. Its a genuine belief that not only you "understand" that character, but that when using romantic language addressing that character, it is not just an outright lie.

am i just not understanding the tone? Is the whole "thats my husband" thing a joke and not laying any kind of romantic insinuation? ive only ever seen it used as such, but it could be different on tumblr.

[itgomyway]

hi calypso! i hope you’re doing well! First i want to tell u that, finding your blog was a blessing, out of every other bling i’ve seen, you resonate the most w me, so thank youuu.

so i’ve a question, i tapped into ND quite recently, and i’ve seen quite a few blogs say that let everything be, don’t fight it, don’t do anything just be, but what’s conflicting w me is suppose they have an exam or project to do, which is super imp, how can they just leave it be? i underhand it’s all illusory, but they just run w the “don’t do anything, don’t desire” but as humans we do desire, that’s sort of inbuilt 💀. tbh i don’t like that, bc imagine i want a high paying job, i’m living the life i want and they say dont desire it. if i was like 60, i’d be okay w such a mindset. but i’m literally 21 and i can’t really say my life was amazing ☠️, when i read such things? it feels hopeless so to speak.

i hope it made sense 😭💀. but once again, i appreciate you and your blog sm!!!

**idk if this counts as a success story but i had a deadline for my project and i didn’t do it at all 🧍🏻‍♀️. like it was 70 marks, on the day of the submission i was super laidback (yes i had doubts but i let go of the problem and just went on w my day) that they’d extend the deadline,AND THEY DID 💀**

hello thank you for your kind words :) and, i agree that hearing you shouldn't desire despite that being all you've ever done is intimidating. but look at it this way:

i have a job i go to. as consciousness, i don't need to do anything or desire anything because all is now. consciousness and now are the only existing things. however i occupy a human body. you can meditate all fucking day but it will not change the fact that you are experiencing the human condition. ive come to understand this after studying nd for awhile. people who have hardly been studying non dualism will find it weird. you spend so much time understanding that all that appears outside of you is an illusion. they won't understand that part yet. that's fine. it literally places your whole understanding of reality upside down. so me as consciousness doesn't have to worry about anything but that doesn't prevent me from my human responsibilities. when they take their exam or when i clock in, they know they are actually consciousness and all is an illusion besides them so why fear an exam they conjured? sure "you" can study but you as consciousness aren't doing anything but being. by existing you are being whether you choose to actively participate in the illusion or not.

[papirouge]

Lol I've seen those weirdo women (well, girls many times as most are quite young) that lust after serial killers, they literally are a minority though so I don't know what that anon is even doing lumping them with the bigger "bear vs man" phenomenon lol. I have zero interest in serial killers but I do have an interest in the Columbine School Massacre for some reason, and sometimes you do stumble upon the fangirls of the two shooters, but most people shun them or dont pay them any attention. I think the fanboys are more dangerous as some of them have actually go out and commited their own shootings (many school shooters have cited the Columbine duo as their inspiration and all of them have been male).

Some of those fangirls ship the two dudes together and even make theories about how they actually loved each other romantically, or at least one of them lusted after the other even though both showed clear interest towards girls lol fujoism is one hell of a drug.

Speaking of fujoshis I think yaoi will be the next big trend in romance in America and other English speaking countries. It's become super popular in Japan, SK and China (even though China hasnt got the best reputation with it's treatment of gay people, many bl manhuas have become extremely popular to the point they've shown gay men kissing and straight up sex scenes on mainstream television, which wasnt permitted before, money talks and bl brings a lot of it).

Ive never understood why girls like yaoi so much...

Weren't the Columbine shooters massive racist asshole? noah offense anon, but anyone's obsessing about those dude gets a major side eye from me. That serial killer/mass shooter fandom shit is super white-coded. I also find super funny that a significant amount of mass shooter were atheists, yet barely anyone draws the line between atheism and the god-like complex of causing a murderous rampage because of *whatever psychosis those freaks had*, but the moment one self professed Christian does shit, suddenly it's the fault of Christianity lol

"yaoi will be the next big thing"

Huh? Yaoi /yaoi novel has been immensely popular for years now. Even when I was a teen (mid 2000s) it was all the craze. Fujo culture is the sublimation of the female sexual frustration coupled with the fear of male sexuality. That's why in yaoi (at least written by women) there's always one character representing the "submissive" energy associated the female (slim, naive, younger, etc - never forget that Japan is still mad patriarchal & reinforce gender roles to crazy levels...so I'm not surprised that even yaoi mangaka perpetuate those roles on their same sex stories). That's what makes yaoi so popular. In a society where female sexuality is so restricted or censured, yaoi was a way of expression. There's no wonder this genre is championed by women. And also why it's more popular than yuri fo example (that's much more straightforward than yaoi as it shows actual women having sex) - which is more taboo than gay male sex because lesbian sex has no man involved which is a serious taboo in a very patriarchal society such as Japan.

I've witnessed the rise of gay romance in kdrama too. That's what I would define as a new trend. I don't think much of it besides how pissed anti woke Japanese weebs/Koreaboos probably are about it lol

[spicybylerpolls]

genuinely dont know where ive been going wrong but ive literally only ever found about one fic where will bottoms so idk what all this WHERE IS BOTTOM MIKE??? chat is about lol

the fandom loves to babygirl mike and unfortunately that leads to babygirl bottoming even tho bottoming isnt intrinsically submissive

sigh

personally i find bottom will to be more canon compliant purely because we have yet to see them sexual together AT ALL and everything about will’s love for mike suggests he wants to be ravaged as it were. Top will can come later sure, but he NEEDS to bottom to self actualise

Please note that the purpose of this blog is not to be creepy or to make anyone uncomfortable. That's why I created the #spicy byler tag (I will tag all polls with this). If you don't want to see this blog or anything related to it on your feed, please block that tag. Not everyone is comfortable with this sorta stuff, and that's okay.

[claratyler]

I actually lost sleep over merlin last night and i still have a lot of thoughts

i never actually watched the show after the first time through when i was 14. And the impressions i was left with this entire time was: merlin is gay; arthur and gwen are SO cute but i still think merthur is even stronger; morgana's downfall makes me depressed because once they were all friends and then she betrays them all; poor merlin trying his hardest to make the parts of destiny he likes happen and the parts he doesnt like NOT happen, he is literally a tragic hero and for all his efforts, for all his sacrifice and the time he spent closeted, arthur still dies and the ending made me sob for a week

But now that i'm rewatching i feel like i remembered it completely wrong and i feel like a lot of people do too. Yes the ending is tragic and it hits as hard as it did because we've always knownit was going to end like this, they've been telling us since season 1!!

But its also tragic because..merlin is such a damn bootlicker. Its tragic to see him stop fighting for his rights and even stop WANTING to stand up for himself. All he cares about is arthur arthur arthur, and i dont just mean this like he's obsessed in a bad way because he loves kissing the monarchy's ass. ITS BECAUSE MERLIN IS 100% ACTUALLY GENUINELY IN LOVE WITH ARTHUR! And arthur loves him a lot too, just not romantically. ANDTHESE TWO ASPECTS ONLY MAKE MERLIN'S SITUATION ALL THE MORE TRAGIC AND PATHETIC.

For some reason I remembered this show as being so sad because For The Power Of Good, merlin had to sacrifice living openly. When really this show is so sad because Merlin willingly submits and renounces his rights, his fire, his rightful desire for respect for himself and his kind all because he is in love with a man who, if he knew the real him, would have him exiled or even executed

And you know what? There's elements of that same Tragedy Of Bootlicking in gwen and gaius as well. Both have been wrongfully accused and nearly executed by uther (gwen's father was ACTUALLY executed by him) and yet they continue to not only not seek revenge (which fair enought, thats your choice) but they continue to serve under him DIRECTLY at his fucking palace. ?!?!? Logic?!?! Logic where did you go?!?

Gaius has been criticized in the show by other sorcerers for betraying their kind for standing by as they were slaughtered and now working directly for uther. Why?!? Why did gaius do this?!? Honestly, i have to believe it was just fear and cowardice and convenience. His other choice was exile or maybe death and he chose submission. MUCH LIKE MERLIN!!

What about gwen? Why does she stay in camelot after her father is murdered? How can she possibly bear it? Because she is in love with a man who she believes will bring about a new era of prosperity and peace and rights (for servants and the lower class in general). MUCH LIKE MERLIN!! (Except he also wants rights for those with magic)

Morgana is the only bitch i respect around here. She is the only one who says "you know what? Fuck this and fuck you, i will not submit just because i have blind faith in the hope that one day things might be a bit different". Oooo and she is the villain of this tale, i see... just because she refuses to bootlick...