#there goes my unhinged man
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He really can emote perfectly with just his eyes. My goodness. I'm not gonna lie, this is frightening.
#but it's also pretty hot#like sexy as hell#there goes my unhinged man#hello#but i can fix him#i know i can#just let me#i want to hug him#mike hubble#boon season 6#my sweet alfredo#my heart#❤️❤️❤️❤️#alfred molina
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mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.
now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.
He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.
(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)
The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.
The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.
And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.
(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)
The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.
anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)
#mxtx svsss#svsss au#scum villian self saving system#shen qingqiu#shen yuan#luo binghe#disciple shen yuan#scum villain#svsss#*points at SQQ/SY* i want him to go nuts. as a treat. let him crumble just a little over the stress of his fate and the stress of survival#and the stress of having a lack of autonomy over a handful of his decisions. starry craves angst and she craves a very specific SQQ angst#he was a number 1 hater back in the day and lbr being a hater takes energyyyy. ive heard that this man was the BIGGEST hater i wanna#see him rip a man to shreds with nothing but his tongue and a voice that could cut marble clean in half. skin a man alive sqq you deserve i#*mortal kombat voice* FINISH HIM#i love without-a-cure but unfortunately i dont think SQQ would be able to have WAC and also survive in the abyss.#the succubi nest that adopted him tried seducing him at first. it didn't work. but he did somehow charm them with his cringefail ways#so now they have a brand new mortal big/little brother to dote on. SQQ is frankly delighted to learn all about succubi culture that doesnt#revolve around sex. he makes quite a few friends/allies in the abyss because of his pure fascination and unbiased desire to learn about#demonic culture and all the different niches and nuances of it across species. he's still going insane tho. like that's not stopping.#there's a single LBH pov chapter in the fic and its frankly so unhinged it was fantastic. he's so possessive. he straight up goes:#'oh SQQ isnt gonna be the next peak lord. he's ascending to heaven with me when i do :)' when Sha Hualing (also peak lord) told him that he#couldn't keep his disciple in the bamboo house all the time. what was SQQ gonna do when LBH ascends and he becomes the new peak lord?#gosh that first chapter is rotating around in my mind so bad. LBH was SO unwell. like losing his actual shit over SQQ near the edge.#i so want to write a oneshot abt this where SQQ is also in hysterics (albeit over slightly diff reasons) and tells LBH on his knees:#'this disciple deeply apologizes to his shizun. for he will not be ascending to the heavens with him.' right before he falls into the abyss#this au being disciple SY is for shits and giggles but i can also see it happening for regular SQQ bc 'fuck it im a dead man either way'#frothing at the mouth at this idea also being a SY-is-SJ au too. for the extra angst of SQQ trying to bear the weight of multiple lives on#his shoulders and trying to figure out what is real and what isn't and if he's meant to suffer in all of his lives no matter what he does.#not once in his life has he ever been free to do what he likes has he? self-hatred to the max. he's going mad. poor boy :]
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I just rewatched the bit from TLJ where Ben and Rey have their first accidental Zoom call and Rey sees him and immediately starts making threats on his life and bro is just looking around like “Can you see my surroundings? I can’t see yours. Do you have a background turned on?”
I haven’t actually watched the sequels since the years they came out so. Sometimes I forget that canon Ben Solo is actually just as much of an idiot as I imagine him to be
#the last jedi#ben solo#rewatched the scene where Snoke verbally abused ben too#tlj did luke so dirty but it also did ben so GOOD#the bit where Kylo chokes Hux and goes ‘bruh I’M the supreme leader now’#UGH I love Kylo he’s a baby and a dork and also insane and dangerous#and also? not a real threat. but also he IS.#like he’s a threat not because he knows what he’s doing but because he’s UNHINGED#kylo ren#I also rewatched the scene from TROS where han speaks to ben#I expected it to hit me harder but it. really didn’t hit at all. and idk why.#I guess most of TROS feels like a game of bingo like. you can just see all the checkboxes they were trying to hit#ANYWAY list of things that are soooo ben solo:#when he did that sock slide on the floor#when he told lor san tekka ‘you’re old lmao’#when he did the Solo Shrug#when he said ‘han solo feels like the father you never had. hewouldhavedisappointedyou’#when he couldn’t kill his mom#when he commanded every gun they had to fire on that man (bruh)#when he told Snoke ‘I’ve given everything I have to you. to the dark side.’#when he immediately died after having his first kiss#(yes that was his first kiss he has no rizz the man is rizzless)#UGHHHH HE’S MY FAV AND I DON’T KNOW WHYYYY
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Different type of Sabo 🔥
#one piece#sabo#revolutionary sabo#marine sabo#flame emperor sabo#unhinged sabo#sabo sabo sabo sabo#oooo#the one man who makes my heart goes doki doki#XD#illustration#more will come heh
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Yesterday i read the last (updated) chapter of the guild member next door. And had a terrible time finding out that i couldnt find the novel anywhere - not even to buy!!! - and then i decided to move on. You know like a big adult. Then today i read netkama punch in one sitting and was like "damn... is there a novel?" Only to find myself in the same predicament. Is this a joke from god? For how much longer do i have to read nice cool and interesting things only to find out i will have to wait for more idk 10 years for it to finish???
#i mean i understand and appreciate the time and effort that goes into writing editing translating drawing the manga and the novels#but man my reading list keeps growing#and having to wait every week to read a single chapter of something i love is kind of strainibg my patience#rant#still#i love both of these stories they are funny and netkama punch especially is so unhinged its acctually twice as funny#like man you really cant reason that the guy who doxxed you and went into your house bc you ghosted him is actually the wrong one here???#netkama punch#the guild member next door
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The definition of original experience is growing up thinking that Area 51 had musical Ninjas, secret agents, fossilized replicas of actual dinosaurs, and goddamn time machines...
all because of a Wild Kratts fanfiction
#wild kratts#pbs kids#kratt brothers#martin kratt#chris kratt#pbs kids go#That was my first introduction to Area 51 and man it goes to show#That fanfiction was also unhinged but super fucking rad#the Ninja was Aviva's bf#Jimmy had a Creature Power Suit#There were a whole new array of villains including a Mystery Man left on a cliffhanger#fucking Dinosaurs#and ZOOBOOMAFO HIMSELF APPREARING#It was a canon event#10/10 fan-work no cap
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MHA dub Season 7 episode 16 should be titled Skeptic has several neurotic mental breakdowns in the span of two minutes
#MY GUY SOUNDS SO UNHINGED IN THIS EPISODE#Man I hope his dub VA had fun recording for this ep!#Mans voice goes to heights not even I was aware existed#Man goes through the full seven stages of grief over a cat gif#MHA#Skeptic
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brocal for the ship bingo?
The OTP to end all other OTPs... (Man. This wound up being basically Cori's Masterpost of BroCal. AKA... this got long and has some images, since I realized I can post my own art directly instead of just a text link to it lol.)
Wasn't actually expecting this to wind up with a bingo? But I got basically 2?? (Will explain the lighter heart later.) This is A LONG post, and definitely gonna get SUGGESTIVE, bc man, am I obSESSED with BroCal. I'm just gonna go thru each checked box, since I don't know how else to structure this post lol.
Read More to save ppl's dashboards:
I want them to make out with blood: OKAY. I HAVE A WHOLE THING PLANNED FOR THIS CONCEPT. I AM NOT GOING TO GO INTO DETAIL ABOUT IT JUST YET BC I ACTUALLY WANNA WRITE IT. I'm obsessed with this one fanart of Bro licking Lil Cal, and it spurred on an idea I outlined and really wanna write: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/739969858334294016/hiiii-mutual-i-am-secrecy-asking-if-u-have-anymore
((Sorry for the plain text links, Tumblr app is NOT cooperating with me right now to add hyperlinks. I'd post the image directly if that one was mine.))
Basically, I just really need to see Bro and Cal making out with blood in their mouths, and I started a whole convoluted, unrelated outline in order to make that hapen. It'll probably just be a really short thing that ends at the uh climax, since otherwise it's gonna end up sadstuck. And I don't like sadstuck lol.
Undeniably t4t: Bro and Dirk are always trans for me, and Lil Cal's got that uh... what percentage did I calculate it out to be? 13% of Dirk is in Lil Cal [ My shitpost calculations: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/746702663327072256/i-ran-out-of-tags-rambling-about-this-so-im-just ] so Lil Cal is at least 13% trans because of that much of Dirk being in him, plus however you feel about the other components being trans. LMAO this is ridiculous to type out. Moving on.
EDIT: FUTURE CORI INTERJECTING WITH A:
"Lil Cal Top Surgery Healing Progess: Day 1"
Terrible for each other affectionate/derogatory: I don't even know where the affectionate/derogatory split occurs. I multiship BroCal as both Bro/normal puppet Lil Cal and as Bro/evil juju puppet Lil Cal, and whatever combination in between or outside of that. Terrible in that Bro is so obsessed with Cal that he doesn't have normal relationship/social skills and uses Lil Cal as both a crutch and motivator alternately, in a terrible cycle, or maybe rather... spiral. And also terrible in that Bro is caught in the allure of playing the role of puppeteer while also being a puppet for the darker parts of Lil Cal, whether he actively knows it or not. (Honestly though, I feel like it's dismissive if you try to blame all of Bro's faults on Lil Cal like this tho, which is why I tend towards liking Lil Cal as just a regular puppet a lil bit more. Or at least, a regular mildly supernatural puppet since that can be a little more entertaining if Cal can get into mischief while no one's looking or give off the vibes of his mood more directly, rather than like entirely inanimate or 'just LE, trapped in a puppet body.' Again, I like all of these concepts.) ((I mean that can also be a whole post of its own, like, by the time Bro gets ahold of Lil Cal, are any of the other components still alive in there? Like, are ARquius and Gamzee still in there or did Caliborn kill and consume them entirely? Idk how it works, man. This is why I like Lil Cal as his own person, maybe just influenced by the feelings of the others. LaCroix: CalGamARquius essenced water. Lil Croix.))
They need to get weirder with it: YES YES. 1000% YES. I need entirely shameless Bro doing entirely shamless things to Lil Cal. I want them inseparable and doing unspeakable things to each other. I want Bro taking full advantage of Cal having a puppet body and all the intimacy that comes with making repairs and being elbow-deep in stuffing.
Playing with them like dolls cute/psychological torture: This is the same divide as with the 'terrible for each other' point, so I'm just gonna go with the cute one, since the torture one is self-explanatory. I want them fucking married. Like. Full mushy cute romance type of relationship that Bro has never felt for any of the people in his life (cough aromantic cough). I made this comic not too long ago, and I often fondly look back on it, because I adore the concept of Bro being lovey and romantic and everything out of character around Lil Cal because he feels safe and loved and comfortable around Cal:
[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/750602227910131712/brocal-4-lyfe-so-i-had-this-idea-of-dave-being ]
I made a post a long, long time ago (not gonna link that one bc it was personal and I was being very obviously mentally ill ["C'mon, like you're not being obviously mentally ill while typing paragraph upon paragraph about BroCal still in 2024 like 10 years later??" Fair.]) But the gist of it was that, like, having objectophilia or objectum sexuality is like, from an outsider pov, it's a way to express love to yourself. You filter all your self-hate through the object you love, and you get back unconditional love in return.
Lil Cal is never gonna hate Bro, no matter what Bro does. As a regular puppet, Lil Cal doesn't have the capacity for hate. And so that only brings them closer, since Cal is never gonna reject Bro for any reason. (Back to being a crutch. RSD is real, and Dave is probably a big trigger for that since he's not on the same wavelength of weird as Bro [not blaming Dave, obviously, this is a post about BroCal].) Bro can experience receiving positive attention from Lil Cal, without feeling 'fake' or uncool by expressing that same attention or affection directly to his own self. (Things are always done through multiple layers with the Striders, aren't they?) ((And I'm not saying Lil Cal doesn't love Bro, or that their relationship is just pretend - it's real, I'm just like, 'What's going on behind the curtain in the mundane situation?/ How is the relationship appealing?' Lil Cal luvs Bro 5eva 4 lyfe and that's a hard fact. Could cut diamonds with that shit.)) Example: maybe Bro is dealing with a bout of body/gender dysphoria and is trying to take out his frustration with working out, and it's not helping, even if he's powered through a set better than normal. Then, he notices the way Lil Cal is watching him, and he can feel the excitement seeping off Cal. He can sense the echoes of a wolf-whistle ring out through his mind, and it's like. Okay, none of that shit from before matters, he's got all the validation he needs right there in Lil Cal. Maybe flex in Cal's direction, Bro?
Oh, so back to being cute: isn't it wonderful how the template maker phrased it as 'playing dolls'? But yeah, I want all the mush and everything. Bro has a whole wardrobe for Lil Cal for every minor event that occurs in the Strider household. I want them going on genuine dates. Maybe even... holding hands. Bro blushes for the first time since he was 16. He even gets to take Lil Cal with him when he goes out to DJ or put on a show. Not to mention the whole website business. (I've talked about Cal's role in that before, but I'll mention it in a moment...)
They will die in a heart shaped pool of blood: I mean, kinda did happen, even tho Lil Cal didn't perma die right there. I don't think this one needs any explanation, since it basically happens in canon.
'You should see the other guy...': Okay, so. About 11 years ago, I had a really great idea. About how smuppets enter this world. I expanded on it in the following more-recent post (adult only content lol): https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/741683686717669376/back-in-the-day-my-friends-called-me-insane-when-i
To sum it up, whenever Bro makes a new smuppet design, he then gives it a video debut on his website, where uh, Lil Cal births the smuppet like it's a horror movie scene, fake blood and poly-fil gore all over the place as the smuppet crawls out from the viscera. Bro then gets to play aftercare by lovingly and gently cleaning up and restuffing Lil Cal as they get to admire their new creation and rake in the dough lol.
So it's technically not a 'you should see the other guy' kinda situation, but it does involve one of them being... idk what word would describe it. Injured by the other? Usually a character loses a fight and says this to act like they got out of it better than the other guy, but... We could have someone knock on the door during the filming of a scene like that, and Bro has to answer it with fake blood up to his elbows, and be like 'You should see the other guy.' (But obviously, that's a terrible idea and would cause more trouble than it's worth... Maybe worth it for a persistent door to door salesperson, though.)
Though, I guess I should also say, I'm not opposed to Bro beating on Lil Cal in or out of the bedroom. Or in the case of animate Lil Cal, Cal choking out Bro. In or out of the bedroom, lol. Depends on the situation, like I said I will ship this ship any which way. But my preference for animate Lil Cal is to be like a totally normal puppet around Bro (or mushy in-love with Bro) and then evil-murder-puppet towards anyone else in Bro's life, like a... toxic yaoi guard puppet. (New Phrase Achievement Unlocked!) Bro brings home another guy to have sex, who tries to stay the night due to the late hour, but the guy wakes up shortly after to see Lil Cal standing there with a knife in the dark, eyes glowing red. Panic ensues when the guest screams and freaks out, and by the time Bro's got a light on, grabbing his sword, ready for a ninja vs ninja fight (bc an intruder would've had to bypass all the traps), Lil Cal is just innocently splayed across the desk chair, no knife in sight. Relevant post (well, the caption on the post too, saying how Bro can't seem to hold onto any relationships besides Lil Cal):
[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/741830516962164736/i-want-you-so-youre-mine-always-selfishly ]
Uh, lol, also Cal choking out Bro in the bedroom, adult only drawing: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/754328907438800896/i-wouldnt-wanna-be-my-ex-when-he-found-out-who
Thinking about them always and forever: Listen. My Tumblr as proof, I've had BroCal on the brain for at least 11 years at this point. Definitely longer, since I first started reading Homestuck. I fucking love puppets and dolls and plushies and I always have. Man, if I hadn't deleted Tweets (automated app I used to do, and I couldn't choose what to save) from when I was in high school, you could've seen me @ ing my fave band when they were taking lyric suggestions on a fan-inspired album, where I was telling them 'make a song where the theme is puppets' and, while I don't know if they saw that or took the suggestion (they had responded to me before bc they weren't huge yet), there is indeed a song titled "Puppets" on that album, and it was my favourite song on there. Point is, I was fated to ship BroCal before I even knew it existed.
Sicko 2 sicko communication: I mean, does this even need explaining? Bro and Cal aren't just on the same wavelength of freaky, they're the fucking source of the wavelength, and it's causing a feedback loop between them. And it does as feedback does, which is, it amplifies with time. (Going back to the spiral symbolism here, lol.) ((Actually, time can play a symbol here, too, I guess, but idk how to word it, I'm starting to run out of steam.))
Let them have a happy ending: God, I need this so badly. I know Bro's story ends in Homestuck, but like. Pls. Someone needs to officiate their wedding. Currently placing the dreambubble order, but I can't organize a wedding by myself. OH speaking of. In that lil comic I did above, where Bro is accepting Lil Cal's proposal, I had the Natural Born Killers wedding scene in mind. I was gonna draw that as a follow up, but I think I have too many WIPs going. Just two people on the run, saying "I do" in a scenic but completely ordinary roadside location. Idk why, I keep going back to that movie for things related to Bro (I mention it in a very important scene in a longer WIP I've been writing, as something Bro watched and internalized as a kid lol.) It's not the best movie lol. Anyway.
The devotion omg: I feel like I have already gotten my point across about this, but let me reiterate:
[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/735842968450269184/in-the-name-of-iconic-magical-girl-anime-ill ]
Bro and Lil Cal absolutely beat the shit outta Jack Noir before he gets prototyped. And even then, they fight together till the death, like. C'mon. Nothing more romantic than fighting a losing battle side by side. Also, like, Lil Cal having his own protective chest for safekeeping as seen in the Strider living room? Like, you don't just have a protective case for any old thing, especially something meant to be handled, especially something that is regularly used to smack other things/humans. What I'm saying is, Lil Cal is durable and resilient, and yet, Bro still has a case for transporting Cal safely. Oh, wait, I just thought of something funny, what if Lil Cal goes feral like a cat, and basically the chest is like a cat carrier so Bro can drive without being constricted lmaoooo, I've been typing for hours can you tell?
Kind of homophobic: Listen. I HAD a Cal. Took him to college. Staked my claim on the top bunk bc I am royalty. Proceeded to not have anywhere to set my water cup and had to use a cardboard box as a table up there. Spilled water. Melted Cal's sharpie-drawn face. And then proceeded to cry. I have a WIP of Lil Cal 2, but that requires actually remembering to work on him. I wanna do better by the pattern, too, since I rushed to finish the first. I have all the material! I have the project started! So it's just a matter of reordering my WIP priorities, honestly.
Where is all the fucking content?!: For realzz. I was actually venting about this the other day (didn't end up posting it), but it's like, either there's no BroCal content, or there IS BroCal content, but I can't reblog it for reasons I don't want to get into on this post. I'm dying of thirst in the ocean, basically. Whatever. This just means I need to make more BroCal content myself, which I am more than happy to do. I've just had a rough past few months, so I'm glad I got to type all this post out, and hopefully I can get back to creating soon.
Last one! I hope this one makes up for the absurd length of the post, it's prob my new fave idea I just came up with on the spot.
[TW drink spiking by a stranger mentioned in this.]
Committing atrocities as their silly little activities: I think we all know what this means, but I am going to ignore that elephant with my special x-ray vision. Because this is a BroCal post. I'm digging deep to the meat and bones of this. Honestly, this could go multiple routes, it depends on how you take your Lil Cal.
One could place emphasis on the 'guard' part of the, ahem ahem, toxic yaoi guard puppet. Maybe someone is actually trying to harm Bro, and Bro legit can't do anything for reasons outside of his control - let's say his drink got spiked a while after he invited a stranger home that he thought was chill. As Bro gets shoved down on the futon, his memory of the night is only a few flickers. Familiar orange plush, roiling around above him like a dancing windsock. Flashes of Lil Cal's face all distorted and stretched wide like a funhouse. J-Lo and Ice Cube on the TV. But when Bro is finally able to fully wake up in the morning, everything is as if he just got home alone last night and passed out on the futon. Cal looks totally normal and content tucked under Bro's warm arm. Except when Bro gets up, there is a pair of shoes too big to belong to him at the door. Maybe Bro knows. Maybe instinct tells him to run. Maybe he does, but he's running towards Lil Cal, every time.
#apologies for being entirely unhinged about brocal. this isnt even the half of it#the-meat-machine#asked#praying my internet posts this in one go in the correct format. rip to everyones dashboard if it doesnt#im not turning on my pc to correct it if i cant fix an upload error from mobile#homestuck#brocal#otp5eva#stridercest#long post#Cori.exe#Post.exe#im like staring at my phone scared to hit the post button bc if tumblr has a fit then idk what ill do#and its like okay i could just put my phone down and go to sleep.#but what if tumblr decides to post it AFTER IM ASLEEP AND CLOGS EVERYONE WHOS FOLLOWING ME'S DASH#if that readmore doesnt save where its supposed to... (has happened before)... i am genuinely so fucking sorry.#oh oKAY WAIT compromise. ill save it as a draft first so the bulk of the upload happens privately in case something goes wrong#bc knowing my internet and how i was fighting hyperlinks last night and today that still wont work. something is gonna go wrong#fingers crossed the draft saves tho i dont wanna copy all this shit from the 'in case of emergency' screenshots i took lol#anyway i really need to get ready for bed fuck lol literally took me hours to type this and its not even polished ughh#toxic yaoi guard puppet#omg tho 'lil cal top surgery' idea had me dying when i remembered theres canon cal sewn up like that#i gotta remember to post that separately tmr#i got this post draftes and gna post now. im seeby#oh wait#puppets#suggestive#striders#man if i wish i started w the last point but i dont have the energy to reorder everything#nini im going seep 4r this time
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Sir that's not a bug-
#﹒†˖̣̣̣ ͜スタースクリーム- VIS. STARSCREAM#(my man got too much freedom to swat our asses like this)#(thats fucking SCARY)#(you literally got SPLAT not SQUISH)#(man starscream is just enjoying the murder isnt he)#tw: death#tw: blood#(ya this is skybound for those who havent read it)#(it gets more unhinged as it goes on)
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#she doesn't have a name but! she has lore#clan lavellan is..ah..a bit unhinged!!!#they worship the forgotten ones and are incredibly bloodthirsty#my girl is no exception#so! let's see how this goes#and yes.....we will be romancing the egg man 😔#mostly bc I want to explore 'what will she do when she finds out her ex is fen'harel' jdklsad#dragon age#dragon age inquisition#da:i#inquisitor lavellan
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Fucking.
Ganzant.
I am so obsessed with this hellfire dynamic, I don't even know where to begin.
Like, yes, there's the delicious dynamic of a zealous prophet and an apathetic god who doesn't even really consider himself a god, but it's also so much more than that.
They're Jason and Medea. Except Ganondorf is more Heathcliff than Jason; he's more Zant than Zant himself is; he is him; they are both Demise. They both saw each other as escape, but when push came to shove Ganondorf cut the spider's thread and let Zant die, and it bit him in the ass when he tried to call upon the vestiges of their bond and Zant clawed him down to hell with him.
They're like Jesus and Maria in the Pieta but Mary is shrieking and swearing while bawling her eyes out and Jesus isn't so tender, meek and mild now, is he? But they're also Jesus and Peter, first Bishop and first Pope, the one who holds the keys to Heaven, but also Peter is Judas, the knife in his back, the kiss on his cheek, and the means by which he fulfills his holy death.
What are they to each other? What is a God if not a Father, Teacher, King, Lord, Brother, Lover, Master, Husband and Traitor? What is a Disciple, if not a Prophet, a Servant, a willing Slave, a Sister, a Student, a Wife, a Mother, a Dog, your Son?
What does it mean, to share the same body, even for a bit?
When does a lifeline become a noose? If you throw down the rope, how do you know you too won't be dragged down? Ganondorf cut the cord, and fell when the waves hit. He was the hand that fed, and when he stopped, the beast had grown large enough to devour him.
They're Adam and Eve; Eve formed from Adam's rib, from him, his side, and when she offered him fruit proved his demise.
Did Odin create his own doom by dividing Loki's children? By damning Hel to the underworld, Jormangundr to the sea, and Fenrir to ribbon-bound treachery?
Do Sigyn and Angrboda both spurn Loki for the way he twisted them? For the children lost, the annihilation at hand? And yet she holds the bowl anyway.
I think Zant loved him. I think it was selfish, and hungry, and childish, and greedy. And I think he meant it. He would have walked barefoot across the desert, danced with knives in his feet on a ballroom floor of shattered glass, crawled on his belly over hot coals and dove to the bottom of the sea for him. He would have swallowed him down to keep him safe, and rebuild him again, and again. and again, as many times as he needed to rise anew. He gave him life, life worth living; and he gave him life, a new body: rebirth.
I do not think Ganondorf knew how far it went. If and when he realises... what then? It's one thing to exploit hatred, greed, to justify your own backstabbing with the idea that he betrayed his own monarchy, his own people, for you,
What do you do, when faced with a love so big it would do anything you asked, at the price of having you?
Ganondorf is a fiercely independent sort of soul. He brought himself up by his bootstraps despite everything working against him, and fought tooth and nail for the right to even exist. He does not trust, cannot trust, and only brings in people with the knowledge he'll cut them off if they become a liability, and specifically seeks out other ambitious, morally-unhinged people for this. No man is an island, but he'll be damned if he's going down with the rest of the continental shelf.
What do you do when you're suddenly given a soulmate?
That has to be fucking terrifying.
You get everything you want, the way you want, at the cost of losing you.
After all, a God belongs to His people.
As do kings, and lords, and fathers, and sons.
What do you do when you seek a contract and find enmeshment instead?
The rope goes both ways: the lifeline is the umbilical cord, and severence means death in either case. Ganondorf overestimated his own viability, and died clawing himself from his "mother's" embrace.
When they go to Hell, do they see each other? Does Ganondorf escape it so he can escape her? Escape her sharp nails, her malformed fingers around his neck, the bitter hisses and saccharine kisses lain upon his ear? Does he loathe the softness of her thighs when she presses his head to his lap and miss them when he lies awake under an open sky?
Does she curse him when he's near and sob when he's far? Does her heart flutter when she sees the sun in his hair, as her mouth fills with bile vowing to drag him back down with her? Does she yearn to be Semele and Euryidice, wishing he would come fetch her and knowing bitterly it ends the same regardless?
Theseus and Ariadne, Dionysus both.
It's been often said that Zeus, Hades and Dionysus were all aspects of the same god.
In making that pact, are they, too?
What is marriage but a vow to merge 'til death do us part?
Do you want to become one with me?
Birth and Death are two sides of the same coin.
Do you want to become one with me?
In cheating it, have you cheated me?
Do you want to become one with me?
Hyrule's history tells of a King of Thieves,
Do
Did you mean to steal this, too?
you
All men are the same; you have no honour. Why must I suffer, for bearing you?
want
I love you; I love you so much; I want you even if it kills me.
to
And it does.
become
You're the moon to my water, the sun in my sky. There are 93 million miles between us, and yet we gain union via an eclipse.
one
I'm your little satellite, your angel, your Lucifer, your dutiful executioner and nightlight. I watch over your bed with fingers aching to dig themselves into your supple neck.
with
It's not fair! It's not fair! I have been nothing but honest with you. Why do you lie to me? Why do you feed me, then withdraw your hand when I try to lick it? Your taste is wonderful; I love you, I love you so much. If you asked me, I'd gobble you up. I have been nothing but good to you; why do you betray me?
m--
I could make you whole. I would give your my blood, my skin, my teeth and my bones. You could use me for spare parts and I'd thank you each time. Just cradle me on your lap; just offer me milk; offer me meat; offer me hair and offer me water.
You can have anything you've ever wanted,
If only you give yourself.
If you get anything, can I not have everything?
#ganzant#ganondorf#zant#twilight princess#scrawny rambles#this goes completly off the rails at the end#i think i got possessed by the Hat Man again#blanket content warning for unhinged enmeshment horror and violence#you know. the usual.#but yes this post has been on my mind for ages i've been itching to type it and now can thanks to my new laptop charger wire#thank you mother i hope you're happy your generosity has given birth to this 😂#met new grandchild: the ganzant pseudo-poetry manifesto#lets hope tumblr doesn't eat this post
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I feel like y'all would appreciate this gem my mom thought of, for context I'm growing out my hair and we're at a weird bobcut/2000s boyband stage
Mom: your hair has gotten so long, you have a proper mane now.
Mom: like a deer.
#personal#deer#man i love my mom but im afraid to know what goes on in her head#somehow shes the less unhinged parent
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i just think hes neat :)
thank u @laceratedlamiaceae for unintentionally fuelling this
#sometimes we have to bring the silly little things inside our heads out into the real world just for the hell of it#this one goes out to all my lesbians out there who continue to be unhinged about that fictional man#i was laughing all the way thru making these#once again i am my own target audience#i couldnt decide which wording worked better so you get both#i also made a blank one. youre a lesbian now izzy#nyxtalks#ofmd#izzy hands#Israel hands
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Maybe i already asked that but whatcha think of jon/sasha/elias as a poly ship. Doomed to fail? Very dramatic but ultimately works? Personally i think elias and sasha would uh. Butt heads to say the least. I can see them work individually but in a poly ship... Eh. Maybe if you add in tim instead of jon he could errr moderate the polycule
Hmmm. I've definitely thought about it a bit (mostly in the context of "Elias should be weird about his archivist"). But the problem is that I'm a Jonshipper at heart and my brain doesn't do as much chewing on non-Jon characters. I think I could see a ship where Jon is sort of the hinge? Like Jon's dating Sasha AND Elias but they're only really connected through Jon (and working at the Institute. And being Eyevatars). There would be some level of fondness there (especially if this is dual archivists Jonsasha and they're getting Blended). Personally I see Sasha being "well he's kind of annoying but I guess Jon likes him so I can tolerate him." Don't currently know what Elias' approach to Sasha would be.
Tim being there could add a Dynamic? But again we run into the problem where my brain refuses to generate ideas or opinions if my Special Little Boy isn't there. It's puffing out smoke. There's nothing. Im sorry.
Oh wait if we're going full Eyevatar au I do think Sasha and Elias could and should bond over enjoying seeing Jon in distress. Eyevatar snack time y'know how it is.
(I mean I think they would all enjoy seeing the others suffer (even if it also hurt or horrified them) but Jon's the one I want to see suffering the mostest. I want to bite the scruff of his neck and violently shake him)
#i'm. i'm very sorry.#what happens is i'm unhinged about shipping but only w/ jon#like i'll ship that man with just about any character you give me.#there's like half a dozen fucking. JONGERTRUDE posts on my blog because i got Weird about them last year#but other characters being shipped? without jon?#my brain will chug along for like a minute before moving on#lizardverse actually kinda has this too#there's like three (romantic) lizardships that i post about ever#and one of them isn't even canon to lizardverse#also sorry for making this about my other special little guys. my mind only really ever goes to two places#and those places are jon and lizardverse#i like a lot of the other tma characters don't get me wrong but jon is the one i latched onto.#should tag this for the ships. i /know/ i should. but goddamnit i'm shy#asks#but yeah thank you for the ask!#it's an interesting concept just not one my brain will chew on
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y’all i am. so so normal about secret life scar. soooo incredibly normal
#rotating him in my mind rn#he opens the episode saying his plan is to make friends only to immediately get a task that means everyone has to hate him#and then !! cleo offers to be his friend !!! finally !!!!! but he can’t !!!!!!! bc fucking tasks !!!#and then he joins the infected and cleo is like nvm no longer friend i :(((#this is the second time scar has had to refuse friendship due to task this is absolutely awful#i hope he goes to the roomies next session pls. he was so fucking close#on a happier note tho that man is also entirely unhinged and i am loving it. kill kill murder kill fuck yeah#scar is winning this season btw i’m placing my bets now. it is his time.#traffic spoilers#secret life spoilers#secret life#trafficblr
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My man Onocha acknowledging / confirming (he even tagged it with Kirinji) that this pose was chosen intentionally and that it has something to do with the other character he plays in modern H&L. I swear, if he really plays Kirinji's ancestor in this (as I predicted), I will lose my mind. Also, the meaning of his name in this is really something. 颯斗 (read: Hayato): sound of the wind, earth, breeze, refreshing, space, Big Dipper (don't get me started on the mythology behind that since the meaning can reach from chasing/hunting, leading, refreshing, to death and mourning) His modern character is キリンジ (Kirinji) which can be read as child prodigy. So far he is on the side of the good guys, but given the implications he is either an unhinged fighting gremlin, maybe a traitor(?), but most likely a future dragon (they are heavily teasing the dragons (Kuryu) in the promotion).
#high&low#high&low the sengoku#hayato onozuka#his official title is apparently “The Warrior of Martial Arts”#my man really goes from playing an angry dragon to playing a very likely unhinged falcon#I swear if the rest also plays their modern day ancestors
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