#there are so many things so deeply wrong with that movie and I love it
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ghostbusteryaoi · 5 months ago
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hey so i watched stripes
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the-2nd-random-kid · 2 years ago
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So i heard that the orv movie is real
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s4kura-tr3 · 19 days ago
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Could you make a crybaby reader with JJK men? Like just an overly sensitive/nice reader? It’s okay if not! Have a good day!
Sensitive!
Characters: Gojo, Geto, Nanami, Toji, Sukuna, Megumi, Yuji
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Gojo Satoru
Gojo Satoru never meant to upset you—he rarely ever did. But today, his usual playful teasing hit you harder than usual.
You were sitting on the couch together, scrolling through your phone while he flipped lazily through the channels on the TV. Out of nowhere, Gojo chuckled and said, “You know, you’re so dramatic sometimes. It’s kinda cute, but it’s like everything’s the end of the world for you.”
You froze, his words hitting a nerve. Dramatic. That’s how people had dismissed your feelings for years. You tried to brush it off, but your chest tightened, and your vision blurred slightly as you blinked back tears.
Gojo didn’t notice at first, still flipping channels and humming to himself. But when you didn’t respond with your usual witty comeback, he glanced over and saw your downturned face.
“Wait,” he said, sitting up immediately. “Did I say something wrong?”
You didn’t answer right away, biting your lip to keep your emotions in check.
“Hey,” he said more gently now, setting the remote down. “What’s going on? Talk to me.”
Finally, you looked at him, your voice quiet. “You called me dramatic. Do you know how many times I’ve heard that? It’s like every time I feel something, people just… dismiss me.”
Gojo’s eyes widened as realization dawned on him. “Oh no. No, no, no, that’s not what I meant,” he said, scooting closer to you on the couch. “I wasn’t trying to dismiss you. I swear, I just—ugh, sometimes I don’t think before I speak.”
You didn’t reply, still feeling the sting of his words.
Gojo reached for your hands, holding them in his warm, large ones. “I’m really sorry,” he said softly. “You’re not dramatic. You just feel things deeply, and I love that about you. It’s one of my favorite things about you, actually. You care so much, and that’s rare. Honestly, I wish I was more like you sometimes.”
You glanced at him, surprised by the sincerity in his voice.
“I mean it,” he continued. “I’m sorry I made you feel like that wasn’t a good thing. It is. You’re amazing, and I’m lucky you put up with my dumb jokes.”
A small smile tugged at your lips, despite your lingering hurt. “You really think that?”
Gojo grinned, his usual playful energy returning as he kissed your knuckles. “I think you’re perfect. And I’m perfectly terrible at saying things the right way. Forgive me?”
You sighed, the weight in your chest easing. “Okay. But maybe think before you speak next time?”
“Deal,” he said, leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead. “I’ll even let you pick the movie tonight as a peace offering. But only if it’s not boring.”
You laughed softly, and just like that, Gojo had you smiling again, his arms wrapping around you to hold you close.
Geto Suguru
It was late in the evening, and you and Geto Suguru were sitting together in a cozy café. He had insisted on taking you out to unwind after a long week, and for a while, the warm atmosphere and his gentle company had done just that. But then, the conversation took an unexpected turn.
You were talking about a project you’d been working on—how much effort you’d put into it and how nervous you were about how it would turn out. Somewhere in the middle of your rambling, Geto chuckled softly and said, “You really overthink things sometimes, don’t you?”
His tone was light, and you knew he didn’t mean it maliciously, but the comment stopped you in your tracks. Your heart sank, and your chest tightened as those familiar insecurities reared their heads. You looked down at your tea, your appetite for conversation disappearing.
Geto immediately noticed the shift in your mood. He tilted his head, his dark eyes softening with concern. “What’s wrong?” he asked gently, leaning closer.
You shook your head. “It’s nothing.”
“It’s clearly not nothing,” he said, his voice calm but insistent. “Did I say something wrong?”
You hesitated, but his steady gaze encouraged you to speak. “It’s just… when you said I overthink things. I know I do, okay? I hear it all the time, and I hate that about myself. It feels like no matter how hard I try, it’s never enough, and people just see me as… too much.”
Geto’s expression shifted immediately, a flicker of regret crossing his face. “Hey, no, that’s not what I meant at all,” he said softly, his voice full of sincerity.
You looked away, but he gently reached across the table, his hand brushing against yours. “Listen to me,” he said, his tone warm and steady. “I wasn’t trying to say that in a bad way. I know you overthink because you care. You care so much about everything, and that’s not a flaw—it’s a strength.”
You blinked at him, his words catching you off guard.
“You put your whole heart into what you do, and yeah, sometimes it makes you nervous or unsure, but that’s only because you want things to be perfect,” he continued. “And honestly? That’s one of the things I admire most about you. I could never think of that as a bad thing.”
The tightness in your chest began to ease as his words sank in. “You really mean that?” you asked softly.
Geto smiled gently, his thumb brushing over the back of your hand. “Of course I do. And I’m sorry if what I said made you feel like I didn’t. I’ll be more careful with my words next time.”
You nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips. “Thank you.”
He chuckled softly. “You don’t have to thank me. It’s my job to remind you how amazing you are when you forget.”
Your cheeks warmed at his words, and the tension that had settled between you melted away.
“Now,” he said, his tone lightening as he leaned back in his chair, “how about I make it up to you with dessert? I hear they’ve got a mean matcha cheesecake here.”
You laughed quietly, shaking your head. “Fine, but you’re paying.”
“Always,” he said with a playful smirk, raising his hand to call for the waiter.
Nanami Kento
Nanami Kento had had an exhausting day. Every step he took up the stairs to your shared apartment felt heavier than the last, and all he wanted was to come home, see you, and let the warmth of your presence melt away the stress.
When he opened the door, you greeted him with your usual enthusiasm, rushing over to pull him into a tight hug. “Kento! You’re home!” you exclaimed, your excitement practically radiating off you.
He managed a small smile and placed a hand on your back, but the weight of his day still hung over him. “Hi,” he said softly, his voice tired.
You didn’t seem to notice his exhaustion as you began talking a mile a minute. “I missed you! You won’t believe the day I had—oh, and guess what? I tried that recipe you love, and I think it turned out amazing! Oh, and Louis did the funniest thing today—”
“Can you give me a second?” he snapped, his voice sharper than he intended.
The room fell silent, and the warmth in your expression dimmed instantly. You stepped back, your arms falling to your sides. “Oh,” you said softly. “Sorry.”
Nanami immediately felt a pang of regret as he saw the hurt in your eyes. You weren’t upset because he was tired—you were upset because he’d made you feel like your excitement didn’t matter to him.
You turned away, mumbling something about letting him settle in, but he quickly reached out and gently grabbed your hand. “Wait,” he said, his voice softer now.
You hesitated, looking at him but avoiding his eyes.
“I’m sorry,” he said sincerely, his grip on your hand firm but gentle. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you. It’s not your fault I had a hard day. I… I was looking forward to seeing you all day, and then I let my frustration get in the way.”
You blinked, your lips trembling slightly. “I just wanted to make you happy,” you admitted quietly.
“And you do,” he said immediately, stepping closer to you. “You’re the best part of my day. Always.”
Your eyes met his then, searching his face for the truth in his words. His expression was soft, full of remorse and affection.
“I don’t deserve to have you greet me with so much love after the way I acted,” he said, gently pulling you into his arms. “But I promise I’ll do better. You’re everything to me, and I should have treated you like it.”
You rested your forehead against his chest, feeling his arms tighten around you. “I just got too excited,” you murmured.
“And I love that about you,” he said, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “Your excitement, your energy—it’s what makes this place feel like home. I’m sorry I didn’t appreciate it like I should’ve.”
For a moment, you stood there in his embrace, his warmth and steady heartbeat easing the lingering hurt.
“Do you want to sit down and tell me about your day?” he asked after a moment, pulling back slightly to look at you. “I want to hear everything.”
You hesitated, then nodded, a small smile creeping onto your face. “Okay. But only if you let me heat up dinner for you first.”
He chuckled softly. “Deal. But don’t rush—just being here with you is enough.”
And as you led him to the table, the weight of his day began to lift, replaced by the comfort of knowing he was home—with you.
Toji fushiguro
Toji Fushiguro wasn’t the type to watch his words. His bluntness was just part of who he was—sharp, quick, and sometimes careless. Most of the time, you brushed it off, knowing he didn’t mean to hurt you. But tonight, it cut deeper than usual.
The two of you were in the kitchen after dinner. You were putting away dishes, humming softly, while Toji leaned against the counter with his arms crossed, watching you.
“I’ve been thinking about trying something new,” you said, your tone excited. “Like a cooking class or maybe painting—something creative. I think it could be fun.”
Toji grunted in response, not looking up from the dish he was drying.
You hesitated but kept going, trying to draw him into the conversation. “What do you think? Would you want to try something like that with me?”
Toji sighed and set the dish down a little too hard, the sound making you flinch. “You don’t stick with stuff like that, do you?” he said, his voice flat. “You get all excited and then drop it a week later. What’s the point?”
You froze, his words hitting harder than you expected. You knew he had a point—sometimes you did lose interest in things quickly. But hearing him say it so bluntly, so dismissively, made your chest tighten.
“I…” Your voice wavered as you set the plate in your hands on the counter. “I just thought it’d be nice to do something together.”
Toji finally looked up, his brows furrowing when he saw the way your shoulders slumped. “Hey, don’t get all upset about it,” he said, his tone softening, but it didn’t help.
“I’m not upset,” you said quickly, though the slight tremble in your voice betrayed you. “I just… never mind.”
You turned away, trying to hide the tears that were already welling up, but Toji wasn’t one to let things go.
“Hey,” he said, his voice quieter now as he stepped closer. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s nothing,” you mumbled, but when you tried to brush past him, he caught your wrist gently.
“Look at me,” he said firmly, his tone still low but insistent. You hesitated, and when you finally met his gaze, he could see the hurt in your eyes.
“Damn it,” he muttered, his grip on your wrist loosening. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“You didn’t have to say it at all,” you whispered. “You make me feel like I’m… not good at anything.”
Toji’s jaw tightened, guilt flashing across his face. He wasn’t good at this—at saying the right things or fixing mistakes—but he hated seeing you like this, especially when he was the one who caused it.
“You’re good at plenty of things,” he said, his tone softer now. “And… I’m an idiot for saying that to you. I wasn’t trying to put you down. I just… I don’t know how to say things without sounding like a jerk sometimes.”
You glanced at him, surprised by the vulnerability in his voice.
“I think it’s a great idea,” he admitted after a moment, rubbing the back of his neck. “The cooking class or whatever. And I’d do it with you if that’s what you want.”
“You don’t have to just say that,” you murmured.
“I’m not just saying it,” he said, stepping closer until he could wrap his arms around you. “You’re trying to do something fun, and instead of supporting you, I ran my mouth like an idiot. I’m sorry.”
His arms around you were warm and steady, and you could feel the sincerity in the way he held you.
“You’d really go with me?” you asked, your voice still small.
“Yeah,” he said, pressing a kiss to your temple. “Even if I suck at it, I’d go. For you.”
Your lips quirked up into a small smile, the sting of his earlier words starting to fade. “Okay,” you said softly, leaning into his chest.
Toji smirked, holding you a little tighter. “Good. But don’t expect me to wear an apron or anything. That’s where I draw the line.”
You laughed, the sound lightening the room, and he sighed in relief, grateful to see your smile again.
Sukuna Ryomen
The Heian era was a time of beauty and chaos, and life with Sukuna Ryomen was no exception. Known as the King of Curses, Sukuna was feared across the land, but to you, he was something else entirely. His presence, though intimidating, had always been a source of strange comfort. However, his sharp tongue often betrayed him, and tonight was one of those nights.
You had spent the entire day crafting something special—a delicate embroidered cloth featuring patterns of crimson and gold, colors you knew he favored. Each stitch was precise, your fingers aching by the time you finished, but the thought of presenting it to Sukuna filled you with anticipation.
When you brought the finished piece to him that evening, you entered his chambers with cautious excitement, kneeling before him as he sat on his throne-like dais. “My lord,” you began softly, holding out the cloth, “I made this for you. I thought you might like it.”
Sukuna’s four crimson eyes flicked to the offering, and for a brief moment, there was silence. Then he spoke, his tone as sharp as ever.
“You spent all day on this?” he said, his voice laced with disdain. “What use do I have for something so… trivial?”
The words hit you harder than you anticipated. You had poured your heart into the gift, hoping to please him, and now your efforts felt meaningless. You lowered your hands, clutching the cloth tightly as your vision blurred with tears you desperately tried to hold back.
“I… I just wanted to give you something,” you murmured, your voice trembling.
Sukuna’s brows furrowed at the shift in your tone. He could sense your emotions as clearly as the tension in the air, and the sight of you so visibly upset stirred something in him—something he wasn’t used to feeling.
“Tch,” he muttered, leaning forward slightly, his gaze fixed on you. “Why are you crying? I didn’t tell you to do something like this.”
You shook your head, your voice breaking. “I know. I just… I thought it would make you happy.”
Sukuna let out a frustrated sigh, running a hand through his hair. He wasn’t good at this—at softening his edges. But seeing you like this unsettled him in a way that battles and curses never could
“Look at me,” he commanded, his tone firm but quieter now.
Reluctantly, you raised your eyes to meet his. His gaze wasn’t as harsh as before, and for a moment, the room felt less heavy.
“I didn’t mean it like that,” he said, his voice low but sincere. “I’m not good with… things like this.” He gestured vaguely at the cloth in your hands. “It’s not that I don’t appreciate it.”
Your breath hitched slightly. “You… you do?”
“Yes,” he said, almost impatiently, but his tone lacked its usual edge. “I’m just not someone who knows how to handle… thoughtful gestures. But that doesn’t mean they’re wasted on me.”
You blinked, the sting of his earlier words starting to fade. “I just wanted to give you something that reminded you of… us. Of me.”
Sukuna’s lips quirked into the faintest smirk. “And you think I could forget you?”
Your cheeks warmed at his words, and he chuckled lowly, clearly pleased with your reaction. He reached out, taking the cloth from your hands, his fingers brushing yours briefly.
“It’s well-made,” he admitted, running his thumb over the intricate stitching. “Better than I expected.”
A small smile tugged at your lips, and Sukuna leaned back, his gaze softening just slightly. “Next time, don’t exhaust yourself for my sake,” he said. “You don’t need to prove anything to me.”
“I just wanted to make you happy,” you said softly, your earlier sadness melting away.
“You do,” he replied, his voice quiet but steady. “Even without this.”
The warmth in his words made your heart ache in the best way, and as he set the cloth aside carefully, you knew that, in his own way, Sukuna was trying.
Megumi Fushiguro
Megumi Fushiguro was in a foul mood. Gojo had been pestering him all day—constant teasing, unnecessary tasks, and endless comments that pushed his patience to the brink. By the time he walked through the door, his mind was racing, and he felt like he was ready to snap at anything that moved.
You had been waiting for him to come home, your excitement bubbling as you thought about sharing the small surprise you’d planned for him: his favorite snacks arranged neatly on the coffee table and a cozy spot on the couch waiting for him to relax.
When he walked in, you greeted him with a bright smile. “Megumi! Welcome home! I set up—”
“Can you just give me a second?” he snapped, not even looking up as he kicked off his shoes and dropped his bag with more force than necessary.
You froze, startled by the sharpness of his tone. “Oh… I didn’t mean to bother you,” you said softly, your voice already trembling slightly.
Megumi sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair. “It’s not about you, okay? I just need some space.”
Your chest tightened at his words. He didn’t even glance at the effort you’d put into making his evening better. The snacks, the cozy setup—it all felt meaningless now. “I just wanted to help,” you whispered, your voice barely audible as you turned away, your shoulders slumping.
The sound of your soft, hurt tone stopped Megumi in his tracks. He looked up and finally noticed the care you’d put into the room—the snacks, the cozy setting, and the clear effort to make him feel better. Guilt hit him like a wave.
“Wait,” he said, his voice gentler now as he stepped closer to you. “I… I’m sorry.”
You didn’t turn to face him, your hands nervously fiddling with your sleeves. “It’s fine,” you said, though the crack in your voice betrayed your true feelings.
“It’s not fine,” Megumi said, his tone firm but remorseful. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you. You didn’t deserve that.”
You glanced back at him, your eyes glistening. “I was just trying to make you feel better,” you murmured, “but if you don’t want me here, I can—”
“No,” he cut in quickly, shaking his head. “I don’t want you to leave. Please.”
He hesitated for a moment, searching for the right words. “It’s been a rough day, and I let my frustration get the better of me. But I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. You were trying to do something nice for me, and I acted like an idiot.”
You stared at him for a moment, his rare vulnerability catching you off guard. “You mean that?”
“I do,” he said, stepping closer and gently taking your hand. “I see what you did here. It’s thoughtful, and it means a lot to me. I’m sorry I didn’t see it sooner.”
Your lips trembled as a small smile broke through. “I just wanted you to relax after your day.”
“And I’m lucky to have you,” he said, squeezing your hand gently. “Let me make it up to you.”
You hesitated before nodding, letting him guide you to the couch. As the two of you sat together, Megumi reached for one of the snacks you’d prepared, a small but genuine smile tugging at his lips.
“Thank you,” he said softly, glancing at you.
“For what?” you asked, tilting your head.
“For being patient with me,” he said. “And for always knowing how to make things better—even when I don’t deserve it.”
Your heart swelled at his words, and you leaned against him, letting the tension of the evening fade away. Megumi might not always get it right, but moments like this reminded you why you loved him so much.
Yuji Itadori
Yuji Itadori wasn’t the type to snap at people—he was always upbeat, kind, and quick to laugh things off. But after a long day of missions, training, and dealing with the stress of being Sukuna’s vessel, he’d finally managed to steal a rare moment of relaxation, engrossed in a video game he’d been trying to beat for weeks.
You, excited to share some news with him, entered the room without realizing how deeply focused he was. “Yuji! Guess what happened today?” you said cheerfully, walking over to him.
“Not now,” he muttered, his eyes glued to the screen, fingers flying across the controller.
You hesitated, unsure if he’d heard you properly. “It’ll only take a second! You won’t believe—”
“I said not now!” he snapped, his tone sharper than you’d ever heard before.
The sudden harshness of his voice made you stop in your tracks. Your excitement vanished, replaced with a sinking feeling in your chest. You stood there for a moment, unsure of what to say, before mumbling, “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to bother you.”
Your voice was so soft, Yuji almost didn’t catch it. But when he heard the hurt in your tone and turned to see the way your expression had fallen, his stomach twisted with guilt.
“Wait, no, I didn’t mean—” he started, but you were already backing away. “I’ll just… leave you alone,” you said quietly, heading toward the door.
Yuji quickly paused the game and jumped to his feet. “Wait! Don’t go!”
You stopped but didn’t turn around, your arms crossed tightly as if trying to protect yourself from the sting of his words.
Yuji rubbed the back of his neck, his face filled with regret. “I’m sorry,” he said, his voice softer now. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you. That was really uncool of me.”
You glanced over your shoulder, your eyes shimmering with unshed tears. “I just wanted to tell you something. I didn’t think it would make you so mad…”
“I wasn’t mad at you,” he said quickly, stepping closer. “I was just so caught up in the game, and I got frustrated. But that’s not an excuse. You didn’t deserve that.”
You bit your lip, unsure if you should say anything, and Yuji reached out, gently touching your arm. “Hey,” he said, his voice warm and sincere. “I’m really, really sorry. You’re way more important to me than some stupid game.”
His words made your heart ache in the best way, and you finally turned to face him fully. “You mean that?”
“Of course I do,” he said, giving you that familiar, boyish grin that made it hard to stay upset. “Tell me what happened today. I want to hear everything.”
“You’re sure? I don’t want to interrupt…” you trailed off.
Yuji shook his head quickly. “Forget the game. I want to spend time with you.”
The sincerity in his voice melted away the last of your hurt, and you let yourself smile again. As you started sharing your story, Yuji sat beside you, listening intently, determined to make up for his mistake.
And when you laughed at one of his playful comments, Yuji silently promised himself to never let a moment like that happen again. You were his safe place, his reason to smile, and no game—or anything else—could ever compare.
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thehollowwriter · 22 days ago
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I'm ngl, I think the Spider Verse movies are the best depictions of Spider-man. They embody the very concept of Spider-man perfectly, and I believe this because of the explosive fandom reaction to them, especially the sequel.
So many people from so many backgrounds all over the world started making their own "spider sonas", their own ideas of a spider person. Sure you can just say it's a trend, but people are still doing it now. I've seen disabled Spideys, queer Spideys, Spideys from any country you can think of, Spideys with vastly different designs, aesthetics and personalities, Spideys who are deeply rooted in the creator's culture, yet who are all unquestionably Spidey.
Never before has the message of "anyone can wear the mask" been so true, and never before have so many people believed it.
People saw themselves represented on screen whether it be through the mc or side characters, they saw the limitless potential of so many different dimensions and universes, they saw Miles reject the "canon" and the idea of what Spider-man "has to" be (which is quite clearly at least partially inspired by egotistical and bigoted Spider-Man "fans" who believed there was only one Spider-man and only one way his character could be depicted and only one way his story should be told) and they understood that yes, they were included in the phrase "Anyone can wear the mask"
Spider-man was always such a successful character who everyone wanted to see for a reason. He isn't the same as many other heroes who were all adults and seemed to be in a place most viewers couldn't dream of seeing (rich, a god, a super soldier, etc).
Peter Parker starts out as just some guy, an everyday middle or lower class person who does everyday things like go to school or miss the bus or get fired. Peter was no smooth and classy ladies man, he wasn't a sports star or anything. He was an awkward and shy guy who liked "nerd" stuff.
He, in the words of MJ, "just happened to get bit." It was an accident, a spider bite. He wasn't in the military or creating a powerful suit or anything. He's some guy who got powers and decided to use them to protect people. Just your friendly neighbourhood Spider-man.
Most importantly, he was the first superhero of his kind. Before Spidey, there was no "teenage superhero." There were only adult superheroes, and teenagers only appeared as sidekicks. When Stan Lee suggested a teenage superhero, he was told it was a terrible idea, and nobody would want to see that.
Well, I'm sure all of us in 2024 where the Spider-man IP is worth over $27 billion with ten movies starring Spidey as the mc, and several more where he makes an appearance as a side character, and where Spider-Man: Across the Spider Verse set several box office records and was the sixth highest grossing film of 2023, can see how wrong that was.
Since his conception, Spider-man was a character who defied how things "should be" and took that leap of faith, and it led to greatness. Just like Miles' entire story of becoming Spider-man being completely different from what we've seen so many times before. Just like Miles defying Miguel and carving his own path, even with the threat of "breaking the canon" (which I personally think can be interpreted as a representation of the idea some people have that if you make Spidey "too different", you'll destroy him as a character)
Together, the two Spider Verse movies managed to prove that yes, anyone can wear the mask. You don't need the "right" skin colour or gender or backstory or plot points. Those are not what makes Spider-man who he is, and those are not why people fell in love with his character and concept.
What made Spider-man who he was, was his actions, his compassion, his relatatability, and how he inspired people. He's a hero whose entire appearance is covered by his suit, and yet is not doubted as a hero by those who were saved (plots where the writers want to make him suffer more exluded/hj).
So yeah. I really love the Spider Verse movies. Not just for their animation, music, story, and voice acting, but also for how they managed to embody and challenge the idea of Spider-man and potrayed just why Spidey was so loved.
(I mainly focused on Miles in this lil rant because he's the mc, but if ya'll want to discuss other characters like Gwen please comment or reblog with your thoughts, I'd love to hear them!)
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angelbarelywrites · 10 months ago
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♡ slashers scenarios | first meeting
info;
♡ fandoms; The Boy, House of Wax, Halloween, Hannibal, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, slashers (general), DBD
♡ characters; Brahms Heelshire, Vincent Sinclair, Micheal Myers, Hannibal Lecter, Thomas Hewitt
♡ reader; gender neutral
♡ cw; mentions of blood/violence
The most random array of characters. All 5 are my bfs tho. Also this is written very very informally because it was originally just for myself lol.
•┈••✦ ❤ ✦••┈•
Brahms Heelshire//
> approximateplotofthe movie. jpeg
> honestly you mind your own business once you realize it’s a doll but assume there’s cameras so mostly behave
> you find yourself naturally coddling his doll like a real child when you’re bored, speaking to him constantly
> even though you’re not doing much to upset him, weird things do start happening around the house
> he mostly wants attention
> you leave a note one day
> “dear brahm’s ghost; i’m sorry if i’m not doing a good job as a nanny. i’m really trying my best. I hope we can be friends”
> he scribbles a smiley face on it and you’re a little freaked out / excited
> when he finally shows himself you’re really stunned. but it makes more sense than a genuine ghost
> you’re in such shock that you just. keep going with the evening and make dinner.
> but even once you come to your senses, you end up more sad than scared
> “…they left you all alone. I’m so sorry.”
> he gives you puppy eyes
> “…I won’t do that to you. I promise. I’m staying.”
> he’s even more in love with you than he first thought. even if you’re going to make him shower six times before bed.
> to his chagrin you don’t help him bathe
> but you do kiss him goodnight
Vincent Sinclair//
> bo brings you to him
> at first he’s making some big deal, “special delivery” and all that
> you’re cute
> really cute
> and bo clearly knew you’re the kind of person vincent would like
> but he’s still got a job to do
> damn it
> “h-hey- wait- i can help you—?”
> that makes him hesitate
> “i’m an artist too. i can help with the sculptures. “
> …
>“i’ll be good. promise.”
> he didn’t need much more convincing than that
> bo is surprised he kept you but makes damn sure you’re not escaping
> but you don’t even try because you just feel so deeply for vincent, and he’s so gentle
> you weren’t lying about being an artist so you’re genuinely helpful
> he falls madly in love when you help him resculpt his mask
Micheal Myers //
> Meet because you wrote letters to him
> Not to interview him or as an obsessive fan
> At first out of curiosity, then as a sort of way to vent, because he never responds
> But as it turns out your letters are the only ones he keeps or even opens at this point
> So his psychologist wants you to meet him to see if you can get him to open up- of course there’s a cash incentive
> He doesn’t say a word from the other side of the glass.
> Obviously.
> But you treat it like a normal visit to a friend and just chat mindlessly a while
> And you’re so much tinier and cuter in person
> He wants to stab you so much
> But realizes that if he killed you, he might miss you
> Ew that’s a scary thought
> Still wants to make you scream tho uwu
> He escapes
> Because he’s Micheal Myers that’s what he does
> After his spree he finds himself in your house, bloodsoaked and honestly not all that sure what he’ll do when he sees you
> You don’t even scream, just give a tiny ‘eep’
> “…Micheal?”
> He regrips his knife so he can get it over with. You’ll just tattle
> “Oh gosh- you’re soaked from the rain. And all that blood-let’s get you a shower? I can get you some fresh clothes too,”
> He’s staring down at you in disbelief
> “…what? You thought I’d try and call the cops? I like talking to you.”
> There’s something very wrong with you
> It’s kind of hot
> He puts him knife away and follows you
Hannibal Lecter//
> you’re his patient lol
> at first he doesn’t have much interest in you outside of work
> but god, you’d be such a perfect subject to manipulate with that little authority figure problem you have
> and even though you’re young
> you do recognize some of the finer things in life
> mostly his artwork and cooking. you’re really good at inadvertently stroking his ego
> he starts diving into darker subjects in therapy
> you’re a bit of a morbid person under the sunshine-y exterior
> perfect
> he’s still chipping away at something big you’re keeping from him
> he could do some digging online and through your files but where’s the fun in that
> he gets you tipsy and then starts with the psycho babble
> you finally crack
> you killed some guy that was stalking you years ago
> god that’s hot
> you liked it, at least a little bit
> even hotter
> you licked the blood off your hands and it tasted good
> he’s in love ; good luck leaving
Thomas Hewitt //
> car trouble! it’s always car trouble
> honestly when you rock up to the gas station alone Luda Mae is thinking that it’s a shame the fridge at home is already full
> but you’re the sweetest little customer
> “your name is really pretty ma’am. ever since i was little i decided if i had a daughter, her name would be Audrey Mae”
> new plan, she’s playing matchmaker
> there’s just something about you that’s so gentle
> and mildly off-putting, like the rest of the family
> she brings you out to the farm to see if they have the car parts you need
> and to stay the night, if you really need to
> you run smack dab into Thomas in his old half mask walking in- even Luda expects you to recoil at the least
> instead you turn a bit pink
> “oh gosh- I’m so so sorry sir-“
> Thomas stares at you
> You just shyly introduce yourself, talking enough for both of you
> Luda Mae is already planning the wedding
> “That’s my youngest Tommy- why don’t you show em around? Alright baby?”
> Thomas is a bit hesitant but you’re so little and cute and smell so good—
> He’s already obsessed oops
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afterglowsainz · 1 month ago
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oscar piastri & 3 🧡
did i fall out of line when i called you? | oscar piastri
song; mess it up - gracie abrams
part of the spotify wrapped special
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Every time Oscar got too close, he messed it up.
But it was okay; you forgave him because he was Oscar. Oscar, who had commitment issues. Oscar, who was trying hard to have a lasting relationship with you. Oscar, who loved you deeply. But you also knew he was Oscar, who couldn’t have something good without ruining it.
The day he asked you to be his girlfriend, and you said yes, he went to a club to celebrate and ended up fighting a man who had simply asked you where the bathroom was, thinking the man was flirting with you. He ended the night with a split eyebrow and a broken nose.
The day he was supposed to meet your parents, he got so nervous that he drank too much whiskey and fell asleep, missing lunch with your parents and disappointing you in the process.
The first time you went to watch one of his races in person, anxiety got the best of him, and he didn’t pick you up on the way to the airport, using the excuse that he “forgot.” You knew he hadn’t forgotten—he had simply chickened out and was too coward to admit the truth.
Still, you forgave him every time.
It was just a few hours were left until an event McLaren was hosting with one of its sponsors, and Oscar had begged you to accompany him. It didn’t take much convincing for you to agree. But something felt off; something didn’t feel right.
When Oscar suddenly stopped replying to your messages, you got worried. Early in the relationship, it happened more often—he wasn’t used to having a girlfriend, so he wasn’t used to replying to messages. It was one of the many conversations where you had to remind him that you didn’t care if he didn’t reply instantly; you knew he was a busy man. But he couldn’t go four days without responding and then show up as if nothing had happened. After that talk, his communication improved.
With less than thirty minutes left before your boyfriend was supposed to pick you up for the event, and no sign of him, you knew—without him even saying it—that he had once again changed his mind about taking you, and you wouldn’t be attending the event that night. You looked at your reflection in the mirror: the beautiful long white dress you had bought specifically for the occasion and the elegant silver jewelry adorning your neck—all for nothing.
When it became obvious Oscar wasn’t coming, you took everything off, put on your pajamas, crawled under the covers, and turned on your computer to watch a movie. At some point during the night, you checked Instagram and came across the worst thing you could’ve seen. A video of your boyfriend at the event’s afterparty, dancing with a girl who was definitely not you.
Technically, he wasn’t doing anything wrong—he hadn’t kissed her or slept with her. But the feeling of betrayal consumed you entirely and settled deep inside.
It was over.
Months had passed since the breakup, and Oscar couldn’t stop thinking about you.
You were his favorite thought whenever he didn’t have to use his brain power—while waiting in line for coffee, while driving from home to the MTC, when turning off the lights and trying to sleep. He thought about you and how much he missed you.
He knew there were many things you had forgiven him for that you didn’t have to. And he also knew that the one thing you hadn’t forgiven him for was what he regretted the most. Nothing had happened with the girl in the video—they’d only danced a couple of songs. But afterward, he felt dirty and missed you.
When he arrived at your place, he was shocked to see you crying and then shocked at how quickly your tears turned into angry shouts. You ended things, throwing him out of your apartment.
But tonight, he couldn’t sleep. He wanted to hear your voice and see you. He knew if he showed up at your place, you wouldn’t open the door. So, he settled for the second-best thing and called you.
Did he cross the line? Was it too soon? He knew the answer was yes when you didn’t answer his call. And when he called again, it went straight to voicemail.
The third-best thing, then.
Oscar opened your chat, the one he had neglected far too often but now couldn’t stop staring at, remembering the goodnight messages you used to send him and the ones wishing him luck in his races.
“I know I wasn’t a good boyfriend at all, and I know I don’t deserve you in any way, but I miss you. You made me a better person and a better man. I know every time something good happened between us, I managed to ruin it one way or another, and I’m truly sorry. But I also feel like if you let me back in, we can make it better. I can do better. I’ve improved my habits, and I’ve pulled myself back together. I’m so sorry for all the times I hurt you. I want to show you I’m not the same person as before. Please, give me one more chance.
I love you.”
Send.
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jirsungs · 3 months ago
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first halloween... gone wrong? | dms drabble #4
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word count: 1.6k words
pairing: drummer!jisung x girlfriend!reader
synopsis: halloween was never your favorite. you would choose christmas over it in a heartbeat, but with your dorky drummer boyfriend who absolutely loves it never leaving your side, you might just tolerate the spooky holiday. (set in the drum me, stupid universe but can be read as a standalone!)
warnings: a knife is mentioned, the dms!couple is flirty and GROSS, but most of this is just fluff.
a/n: HIIII 😭 jirsungs nation, rise! it's been 2 weeks since any story related post has been uploaded, and i just want to deeply apologize for not being here ): i missed writing and putting my delusions down in a google doc. but i hope you guys enjoy this short drum me stupid drabble and missed these cutie patooties as much as i did ☹️ as always, feedback is ALWAYS loved and appreciated! happy reading <3
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You were never fond of Halloween. Sure, you loved being able to go all out in costumes and go to Halloween parties with your friends, but you knew immediately that once those plans were over, you were left in your own accompaniment once again.
Some people would be joyful with spending the rest of their nights after parties and such alone, but you? You were used to the party scene and loved it when it never ended. Lucky for you, your dorky boyfriend of a few months, Park Jisung, always kept the party going.
“Hey, have you guys seen Ji?” You asked Ningning and her boyfriend, Jeno, after finally spotting them dancing together on the dance floor. Your voice was louder than usual due to Michael Jackson's Thriller bumping from the party speakers.
“No, we thought he was with you." Ning looks over to Jeno. “I thought he came with you and the guys.”
You both wait for Jeno's reply, but he just shrugs. “He was supposed to, but he was the last one to get ready. If anyone knows where he is, that's Chenle.”
You click your tongue. “I figured. I'm going to keep looking for him. Thanks, guys!”
Ning’s shout of “Good luck!” was the last thing you heard before you committed to walking through the crowd of musty bodies. You were surprised at how many people went all out on their Halloween costumes this year. Your surprise wasn't a bad thing though; if anything, you loved it.
You almost second-guessed your choice of costume. With you and Ning being the only girls in the group, you felt that it was right if the both of you matched. The angel costumes were cute; you were wearing a black tight dress while she wore white, but taking a look at the decided costumes this year, you began to feel basic.
Once you're out of the crowd, you spot Haechan, Mark, and Yeonjun in the corner. You take notice of Yeonjun trying his best to impress some girl while the two boys next to him silently judge, taking occasional sips out of their red solo cups. 
Haechan, in his Pennywise makeup and attire, sees you walking towards them, tilting his head at your costume. “What are you supposed to be? A demonic angel?”
Mark snickers at his friend's comment, which you pout at. “No. I'm just an angel who happens to wear black. And says you, Pennywise, isn't your costume like... super basic?”
Haechan gasps, his hand on his chest for the dramatic effect. Mark rolls his eyes and answers your question instead.
“Every year, the Rockway guys do a group costume. This year, we somehow decided on iconic horror movie killers.” 
“Ahhh… So, that explains your Leatherface mask.”
With a nod of his head, Mark replies with a “Yup.”
You glance back at the party, and the sudden remembrance of why you came up to them in the first place hits you. “Oh! By the way, have you guys seen Jisung? I literally can't find him anywhere.”
Your body physically sulks at their answers, telling you they haven't seen him in a while. With your hope slowly decreasing and the urge to ditch the party increasing, you decide to call him one last time. If he doesn’t answer, you’ll cut the party short and head home, unfortunately finding the comfort of your bed more enjoyable than being here. You loved the company of your friends, but it bummed you out that you haven’t seen your boyfriend all night after him telling you that he’ll be here.
After bidding your goodbyes to the group and giving Jeno the responsibility to get Ning home safely, you make your way to your car. It's late October with the breeze finally coming through, resulting in you rubbing your arms in hopes for warmth. As you walk, your ears pick up on the sounds of your heels clicking against the sidewalk cement until they pick up another pair of footsteps near you. At first, you don’t sweat it, already aware of the scattered groups outside of the frat. 
But as you walk more down towards your car, the shuffling footsteps don’t leave you. Okay, you’ve had enough of this. Your slight irritation was slowly increasing due to this sudden interruption of your plans to waste the rest of your night away by changing out of this angel get-up and watching comfort films.
The only person you craved to see you in this costume was nowhere to be found, anyway. Finally turning around, you face the person but stay near your car for safety reasons.
“Who are you, and why do you keep following me?” You ask.
You didn’t mean to have your words come out sharply, but when you found out your culprit to be someone in a Ghostface costume, it only made you roll your eyes.
“I don’t mean to be rude, but if you’re just here to mess with me, is it okay if you can choose someone else? I really don’t have the energy for this.”
A beat passes and still no response from the person. It was almost as if their feet were stuck in the cement; you were starting to feel chills at the creepy mask staring back at you. But then, your brain starts to put the pieces together.
The replay of what Mark told you earlier back at the party plays in your head. “Every year, the Rockway guys do a group costume. This year, we somehow decided on iconic horror movie killers.” Would it be a coincidence that Jisung, who you haven’t seen all night, just happens to be right in front of you?
Your face softens at the thought of the mysterious Ghostface being your boyfriend. “Ji, baby, if that’s you, I’m going to smack you. Where have you been all night? I called you three times.” 
Still no answer, but now they were slowly walking towards you, revealing what they were holding behind them to be a knife. From where you’re standing, you couldn’t tell if it’s real or a fake replica, but that doesn’t stop your grip on the driver seat handle tightening, ready to pull on it and get the hell out of here. 
But you try one last time. “Okay, quit it. This isn't funny.”
By this point, the wondering thoughts of whether this was Jisung or not cloud your mind. You’re now close to each other, and the Ghostface still hasn’t said anything. 
You know what? Fuck it! You’re not dying today! 
You tug the car door open, ready to rush inside, but the masked John Doe shuts the door before you can. Their gloved hand doesn’t budge on the door, making their body lean against it and impossible for you to get inside.
The fact that they haven’t shoved the knife into your body by now has you suspicious and less frightened, but more agitated. Finally, they remove the mask from their face, revealing— 
“Hi, pretty angel.” 
Your stupid, cheekily smiling boyfriend. 
He has no time to lean in and give you an apologetic kiss on the lips before you smack him on the chest and punch his arm. “You motherfucker!”
“Ow! What the hell was that for?” 
Your eyes squint at him asking you that, resulting in another punch to his arm. “Don’t ‘what the hell was that for’ me! You scared the shit out of me!”
You’re about to smack his chest again, but Jisung’s reflex hits faster than yours. Not giving you another opportunity to hit him, he’s quick to take hold of both of your wrists, which you immediately try to get out of. You hate (love) how strong he’s been getting. With his constant drumming and going to the gym with the guys on the side, it became more and more difficult for you to get out of his grip. 
With your hands unable to move, he takes the chance and plants quick kisses all over your face. Your face flusters quickly with you trying to move away from his lips. He knows he got you when your tugging to get out of his hands stops and you start giggling.
“Ji, stop it!” Your giggles only increase when his kisses do, leading him to drop your hands and place his on your waist instead. 
“I missed you. I’m sorry I didn’t answer; I wanted to keep up the bit of scaring you.” He says after giving you a big cheek kiss and pulling you closer to his chest.
You can’t stop the giddy smile forming on your face. “It’s okay. Just never scare me like that again or I will—” you point your pointy finger on his chest, almost in warning, creating some space between you two, “cut your balls off.” 
But he pays no mind to your threat, smiling down at you like a loser in love. “Yes, ma’am. Never again.”
You encircle your arms around his waist, looking up at him doe-eyed. “Now, can we please go home and watch comfort movies?” 
“Can I first admire how fuckin’ gorgeous you look in this and then go home?”
Oh. You forgot you had this costume on.
Your cheeks heat up at his words. “Language, Park. You could’ve admired this all you wanted earlier if you didn’t leave me alone the whole night.”
He pouts, “Will I at least see this costume some other time, baby?”
"Hmm.” You pretend to think. “I guess, you just have to wait and see.”
“Why wait when I can see it on you tomorrow?” There's a glint in his eyes, and you know it can only mean trouble.
“Easy, drummer boy.”
Little did he know that his almost insulting prank on you sparked an idea in your head. But it’s best to save that for next year, right? 
You guess, with Park Jisung by your side, you wouldn’t mind waiting another year to see what other Halloween pranks he has in store for you.
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calmcoldevening · 3 months ago
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Would you please write some first time sex HC with Art the Clown and a virgin female reader? How would he initiate or how would he be seeing as he’s her first?
Sure, sugar! Hope you'll like it 🍬
First time sex with Art the clown headcanons
Tw: adult content, smut, mention of blood, but mostly I tried to make it soft and comfy. No minors, sugar
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• Most of the time, he has rather strange and somewhat childish ways of showing love. Although the fact that he didn't kill you already says a lot.
• Usually he just looks at you and smiles his trademark creepy smile, although in fact there are a lot of unspoken emotions hidden behind those crazy burning eyes. For you, his heart burns endlessly in a constant stream of childish joy and desire to protect.
• Art likes to come up to you while you're sitting, for example, on the couch in the living room and watching a movie, and put his head on your lap. His fingers dig firmly but gently into the flesh of your soft thighs, causing you to blush deeply and bite your lower lip. But there is nothing vulgar about it. Art just wants your gentle human warmth. Most of the time, his hands and bodies are cold, so he's crazy about the heat of your skin. Especially when you're embarrassed.
• He will be flattered by the fact that he is your first in many ways, indeed. He likes this feeling of possessiveness and an almost animal right to possess. Despite its somewhat childishness and intensity, Art doesn't put any pressure on you. He very often listens to your opinion and takes care of you in his own way.
• Art can be serious if he really wants to, and in the depths of his sadistic heart, he understands this perfectly well.
• It's not that this demon has any desire other than the feeling of itching on his skin from the desire to kill and shed blood. But over time, Art notices that he is increasingly watching couples in love. Very often, he kills teenagers or young people fucking at the wrong time in the wrong place. But he doesn't admire it in any way. He is interested in watching this. And in the place of this red-haired girl, Art involuntarily introduces you.
• Would you make the same sounds? They would probably be even more beautiful with you. What kind of face would you have at that moment? Would you moan his name or vice versa, try to hold back every gentle sound and meow?
• He was interested in getting to know this side of the human body.
• That's why, right after returning home after another murder, Art found you in the kitchen. A man came up close to you from behind and wrapped his arms around your waist with a firm grip. His lips, painted with black lipstick, instantly found your neck, kissing and gently biting the skin. You blushed instantly, feeling your heartbeat quicken.
• "Art.. What are you doing?" Of course you knew what he was doing. No wonder you often thought about this kind of dirty stuff when your boyfriend was at work. But it's one thing to dream, and another to do it. You weren't ready at all.
• Art continued to kiss your flesh, hinting at what he wants. He wanted you to show him this, to let him feel this strange feeling of two bodies together. For some reason, he was carried away by the idea that you know what to do. Or at least your body knows.
• What was his surprise when you not only did not respond to his caresses, but also quietly whimpered because of a sudden feeling of fear and insecurity.
• Art immediately stepped back and gently but insistently turned you around to face him, pressing your lower back against the kitchen set. You felt how unpleasantly the T-shirt stuck to your body from the blood that soaked it. Art will gently take your face in his hands, caressing your cheeks and wiping tears from your skin. His silent way of dumping what happened to you.
• "..scared." The only word that comes out of your mouth. After standing in silence for a while, Art finally connects all the dots and his face is decorated with a devilish grin. He leans closer, wanting to take you in another passionate embrace, but you gently push him away from you. "Please.. take the blood away."
• Art frowns and visibly sulks, but obeys, retiring to the bathroom. It gives you some time to catch your breath and mentally prepare. You're nervously biting your lip in anticipation.
• Although you desperately wanted to let your boyfriend see this side of you and show him your love, the unknown scared you. And you didn't want to disappoint him in any way. These thoughts gnawed at you in the most unpleasant way.
• When Art cleaned and dried his suit, he found you in the bedroom. His knowledge was also limited, but unlike you, because of his inhuman nature, he just wasn't afraid of something so simple. He literally killed people. And yet, the sight of you, so vulnerable and scared, made the 'heart' shrink uncomfortably, which he really didn't like.
• He came over to your bed and sat on the edge of it, looking up at you. His gloved hand took yours and pulled you into his lap. His fingers gently dug into your hips, tasting the pleasant sensation, and a satisfied grin appeared on his face. Perhaps he was trying to cheer you up somehow. You leaned forward and gently covered his lips with yours. Both of you have significantly improved your kissing skills since the last time, so his tongue alone was already making you dizzy. The kiss was slow and soft, Art's fingers gently stroking your thighs.
• After a couple of minutes, you leaned back, looking down at your boyfriend and catching your heated breath. You carefully took one of his hands with your own and put his palm on your chest, nervously biting your lip and nodding as if giving permission. Art blinked a little, but later smiled contentedly, squeezing the soft flesh under his fingers. He saw how scared and awkward you were, so he wanted to do it surprisingly carefully and slowly, although his own knowledge was limited to spying on fucking teenagers.
• Art pulled off your T-shirt, throwing it on the floor, and reverently gently ran his cold hands along your sides.
• Dark eyes burning with a primal hunger. With a swift motion, he lifts your skirt, exposing your bare thighs to his leering gaze. Art's long, pale fingers dig into your soft flesh, squeezing and kneading as if to claim you very essence.He hooks a thumb under your lacy underwear, yanking it aside to reveal the virgin petals, glistening with nervous moisture. Art's lips part in a silent, mocking grin, relishing your vulnerability. One gloved hand trails lower, fingers splaying across your slick heat as he rubs slow, deliberate circles.
• His painted mouth gently presses against your neck, leaving noticeable bite marks and black paint on your skin. He was clearly filled with a desire to mark you as his own. Art's desire grows, although the grin never leaves his face for a moment. The tension in your pants is almost painful. He carefully removes the glove from his left hand and gently runs his fingers along the curve of your heated thigh. Finally, he finds the coveted moist warmth by dipping one finger into it with a wet squish. You nervously bite your lip, trying to hold back the tears that have appeared in your eyes. Art kisses your neck and chin, caresses your sweat-soaked skin with his tongue and lips. The stretch around his fingers is so slight that Art wonders mentally how his dick would fit inside you. Without thinking twice, he dips another finger, and then another and another. Although your walls are still damn wet and hot, almost hungry.
• Art's fingers slow their rough exploration as he senses your increasing unease. He gentles his touch, caressing your thighs with tender strokes, as if trying to soothe any lingering nerves. He continues his deliberate advances, guiding one of your legs to wrap around his waist as he positions himself at your hot entrance. With a calculated slowness, Art begins to push inside, relishing each tiny resistance and the subsequent surrender of your innocence. He pauses often, allowing you to adjust to the intrusion, all while maintaining a hypnotic, unblinking stare. Once he's fully sheathed within you, Art's expression remains stoic, belying the depraved satisfaction he derives from your virgin heat and whimpers. He begins to move, setting a rhythm that's both brutal and methodical, his pale face a mask of concentration as he claims your body with a single-minded focus.
• His movements are slow, almost gentle. He gently squeezes your sides, allowing you to lean against him, and showers kisses on your face and hair.
• Gradually, his movements accelerate, his brain melts from the thrill of such a hot moment. But his mind is still focused on you. The way you sound, the way you feel, the way you feel good. He feels you pulsating and shrinking around him, and tries to rub as hard as possible against that strange point inside you from which, as he realized, you see the stars. Despite his inhuman nature, he was surprisingly absolutely focused on wanting to please you. He wanted you to feel good only with him. To make you feel good.
• When you cum around his cock with a short moan, Art gently presses you to him, splashing streams of hot semen into you and just catching his breath. His lips are kissing your neck, and his hand is stroking your wet hair. His way of saying 'good girl.'
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sweetkpopmusings · 1 month ago
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miserable (you & me) | h. jisung <3
a/n: jisung unlocks a part of me that is deeply emotional and romantic like ...... i love and cherish him so much :-( i really got in my feels with this one, and i hope you enjoy a glimpse into what i think being loved by jisung is like <3 also yes i gave him my favorite lyric of the song as a treat because his lyrics pull me apart and put me back together every time :,-) pics not mine~
content: angst, happy ending | wc: 1.3k | warnings: none really! | pairing: jisung x gn!reader | requests:open
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˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
“i don’t wanna lose a part of me, you are my heart, you know?”
jisung couldn’t believe he was living out an overplayed scene in every book, movie, song, and tv show ever created. maybe some clichés were just universal experiences. if that were true, staring out blankly at flashing lights on the tarmac after the plane touches the ground must be a rite of passage for every modern human. his body barely registered the number of hours suspended in the air, as his mind only focused on one thing: you. if asked about the music he listened to during the flight, he wouldn’t know how to answer. truthfully, he didn’t listen to anything other than the internal chant of your name mixed with alternate beats of i’m sorry and i wish i said so sooner. 
jisung barely survived the past few weeks. existing with love and heartbreak in one body simultaneously sounds made-up, but that was jisung’s reality after he walked away that night. a reality he created and regretted more than anything.
it was classic. both of you were stressed from too many things going wrong in your lives, and the agitation bled into your conversations and actions. even your facial expressions were tinged with negative emotions not meant for each other. then, as it so often happened, one wrong sentence ruined everything. 
you knew jisung didn’t mean it when he said “if you’re so unhappy every time you see me, then why do you keep inviting me over?” 
but he said it, and you heard it, and it hurt. 
though jisung’s face fell at the sound of his words, all you could think to say was, “i think you should go. you have an early flight tomorrow.”
jisung stood there, mouth open, waiting for words–the right ones–to come out of his mouth. the silence hung in the air for too long. he saw your eyes glistening with tears, and he didn’t want his presence to be the reason the tears fell. again, out of exhaustion and fear of a fight, he said the wrong thing.
“okay, i’ll go.”
jisung’s heart broke when all you replied was, “safe travels.”
neither of you made a promise to see each other after jisung returned. both of you assumed you would see each other as soon as he was back, but both of you feared that the other person wouldn’t want to reunite. somehow words unsaid weighed on both of you more than the misspoken ones. but it felt too late. neither of you knew if continuing the conversation tonight was right, so neither of you said anything. jisung’s plane took him away the next morning, and you couldn’t find the courage to close the distance between you two any time soon.
that fear hung over jisung for the entire trip. it ate him up inside, yet he didn’t have the courage to face it. for weeks, he felt frozen. then, perhaps from the adrenaline of finally being in the same city as you again, he found the courage.
as soon as he unlocked his front door, jisung threw his bag on the floor, and, without a second thought, he turned on his heel and rushed to your place. he didn’t care if he had to wait at your doorstep all night and well into the morning. jisung could not, would not rest until he apologized to your face. you deserved that. if his words were what hurt you, then you deserved a million more kind words from him until you were healed. 
his heart was about to burst out of his chest during the seconds between his knock on your door and you pulling it open. you were so beautiful to jisung, and your beauty became more profound when he saw you again. he felt he could cry looking at you in your doorway. even he hadn’t realized how deeply he had missed you until you were within arms’ reach. 
everything had felt so far away for so long, but, with you, finally, jisung felt connected to everything around him. he felt like he could breathe for the first time when he heard your soft hello. he felt the world start spinning again when you said his name. he felt his heartbeat return to his chest, replacing the dull ache that had filled it since he turned his back to you that night. 
“i’m sorry.”
a small, instinctive smile flickered on your face at the sound of his voice, “come inside.”
jisung nodded, shaking from the desire to spill his heart out to you. thankfully, you sensed this, and you gave him the space to make things right again.
“i’m so, so sorry, y/n. i know i shouldn’t have left that night like that, and i know i should’ve apologized sooner. there are so many things to say to you, and you don’t owe it to me to listen. i just need you to know i’m sorry and i regret what i said and did that night. you didn’t deserve that.”
jisung paused. he held your gaze, eyes very clearly filling with tears. he waited for your permission to continue speaking, which you gave with a nod. he blinked, took a deep breath, and filled himself with equal parts courage and love for you.
“i also regret not saying anything, anything at all, sooner. i got in my head. i was so scared that saying ‘i’m sorry’ over text wasn’t enough, and i felt it was unfair to talk like normal when things clearly weren’t normal. i needed you to know how sorry i am. then, as the days passed, i realized a phone call wouldn’t be enough either. well, that, and i was so scared you wouldn’t answer my call. i would’ve deserved it, but a rejected phone call somehow felt more painful than a prolonged silence, so i didn’t call. i’m a coward, i know, and i am sorry for that too. that’s why i’m here.” 
jisung paused again, wiping his tears before gently holding your hands in his own, “you can kick me out as soon as i say my last word. i won’t fight you on it. i hate that i hurt you right before getting on the flight. i missed you so much that i lost my mind. i never want to feel that lost again. i never want to lose you. so i’m sorry. i will do everything you need me to, just so i can make things right again. you are my everything, and you deserve more than everything i can give you.”
tears fell from your eyes this time, which made jisung cry even more. the way you looked at him as you took in his apology gave him hope. he raised his hands to wipe your tears and then cradled your face softly. you were enveloped in his love and the relief that, despite the mistakes, he chose to come back to you. he kept his promise to choose you every time. that was more than enough proof that his apology was real.
your hands covered his, and you smiled despite sniffling, “i forgive you, jisung. thank you for apologizing, and thank you for coming here tonight.”
jisung felt as though he could sob and shout from the rooftops in joy. you forgave him. he hadn’t lost you. his heart would be complete again. 
“thank you, y/n. that means more to me than you’ll ever know.”
a comfortable, tender silence washed over you in your living room. you held each other, cherishing the distance disappearing. this was how things were meant to be. this was what you and jisung would always work for, no matter what got in the way, because the shared space between you was the strongest center of gravity you knew.
once all of the tears dried, jisung smiled brightly and confessed, “i really missed you so much. you are my heart, you know?”
familiar butterflies filled your stomach in response to jisung’s sweet, romantic words, “i missed you too, jisung. i’m so happy to have you back. more than you’ll ever know.”
the way jisung smiled at you made you think that maybe, just maybe, he knew exactly how happy you were.
˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
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icarusredwings · 4 months ago
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Thinking about Logan adjusting to this new timeline, becoming sober, and Wade somehow finding Logan's dog tags. ~4k words.
(Tw: Logan's a depressed recovering alcoholic with survivor guilt, unofficial proposal, canon usual implied sex jokes, Logan tries to flirt but fails)
To my wife. Who's halo lit up my dark life to see just how many doors were available to me when I couldn't see them myself<3
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He offers him his to wear as a cutesie matching necklace type of thing but Logan is hesitant to take them, scared of what will come of it. He does it anyway though because he sees how happy Wade is wearing his.
What he refuses to tell him though is that just hearing the tags jingle makes him jump, flinch, his heart rate rises, and his mind floods with scenes he's worked so hard draining every bar he could find dry just so he could forget.
For me, I, too, am a man with deeply rooted animal instincts and was raised to behave like an obedient pet instead of the animal they made me.
An animal trained to take orders. A soldier without his post is miserable and constantly is either trying to find it again or defend himself from ever having to go back to a post to begin with.
You aren't good enough for them if you obey what they say and excel past the standards. But you aren't good enough if you question their authority and make choices for yourself either. Hoizer comes to mind.
Running with the bulls
Working my miracles
Holding my world together with a boot string
His night terrors are worse, more frequent, constantly a battle between wanting to protect and defend the less fortunate to saying, 'No, I'm done with that. It's none of my business, It’s someone else's problem now.'
He wakes up screaming, claws drawn, every possible sense he has to run activated, panting, gasping almost for air. He's panting, heaving deep but quick breaths, all of the hairs on his arms raised like a cat who just heard a dog barking after having gotten attacked as a kitten.
Living the dream
Benzos and gasoline
Coffee and blue light screens till the morning
He wakes to the sunlight in his face, gets up, stretches, takes his Valium. Eats some toast, calls it breakfast, gets dressed for his weekly AA meeting. The moment he steps inside it smells like Gasoline. Sweet honey scented lies that he hates to admit that he knew all too well. ‘It was only one’ ‘I asked for a virgin one but they brought me the wrong one’ ‘I'm trying, I really am..it's just.. hard’ He's heard them all before but the last one he could relate to the most.
Coming home at night, Logan puts his face into the back of his partner's neck, hugging him from behind as he offers to watch a cowboy movie marathon with him. He barely eats, only taking what Wade gives him or shoves in his mouth like the now spilled popcorn that was all over the ground, His boyfriend sprawled out on the couch while the “Dvd” bounces back and forth on the blue screen.
Wade never likes it but recently he's been drinking coffee at night, pacing back and forth as he searched online for a job. Kept himself far from the nightmares that were trying to catch up with him.
If I tell you this is drowning
You tell me I'm walking on water
I could bring fire from the mountain
You tell me it feels a little colder
Everyone was telling him how good he was doing, how well he was adjusting, how happy they were that he was here and yet.. He didn't feel like he deserved it. Any of it. Not the second chance, not the love and support of all his new family, not the affection from the man who whispered how proud of him he was each night..
It doesn't help his mental status when multiple jobs reject him either. Interviews don't exactly go that well when you have claws for hands and a reputation for having a temper.
“I'm sorry we're looking for someone with more… experience.. in this field. You need an entry level job.”
“Woah dude! You are WAY too qualified to be working here! you should try looking for something higher up, yeah?”
“I'm sorry. You're too much of a liability.”
“Oh my god- You're the Wolverine!”
“Yes.. but uhm.. No.. I'm just Logan now.”
“Wait, why are you applying here? This is a cashier position.”
“I'm aware..”
“Aren't you like… an X-men?”
“N-no… not anymore.”
“Oh… Did they fire you?”
“I quit.”
“Why?”
“Are.. these questions part of the interview?”
What kind of man was he if he couldn't even get a damn job at McDonald's? It felt useless. Like everybody wanted something different from him, but no one was happy either way. Never pleased with his resume or his reputation. You would think being an ex X-man would make it easy. Of course someone would want to hire a superhero? Right? Wrong.
I don't wanna
Choose between being a salesman or a soldier
Just let me look a little older
It seemed everyone wanted him to rejoin the X-men and as much as he missed that mansion upstate, it wasn't his. So many times he's been told stories about himself that he didn't even remember …well.. because it wasn't him. They wanted The Wolverine.
Their Wolverine.
Not Logan.
There was always that spot at the dealership with Peter. Now that Wade was back on his role with mercenary stuff and doing more “Favors” with Colossus, Negasonic and Yukio, that position was open. Part of him- No. Scratch that. All of him was happy for Wade. He seemed to be enjoying life so much more now that he felt he had purpose. But what was his purpose? Selling cars?? Definitely not. Even if it was, they were looking for something else anyway.
“It says here that you are 286 years old. Is that a typo?”
“Oh- uhm… No..”
“I see…Well we are currently looking for someone… younger.. to fill that spot. Sorry.”
But they were never actually sorry. He could smell it.
Coming home from the failed hunt, he felt like an older lion losing its pride to a younger male lion. Well- if lions could develop arthritis in their knees and hands. Once a day he'd pop out his claws, just to keep them ready though he felt like he hadn't used them in such a long time… Maybe he really was turning into an old house cat like wade said.
Sitting in their shared bedroom, he was grumbling to himself, grunting as he tried to get his claw unstuck. This wasn't the first time they locked up and he feared it wasn't the last either.
He snapped his head up at the sound of tags. Around the corner came who he expected, Wade, quickly hiding his hand under the blanket. Coming in, his eyes widened.
“Woah wolvie! Without me? Really? I would have gladly done it for you.”
At first Logan wanted to thank him for offering to help before quickly realizing that from how his hand was under the blanket, it did look suspiciously like adult alone time.
“T-that's not… no.”
“M'kaay. If you say sooo~”
“H-how uhm.. How was work?”
Watching as he began to grab shower clothes and take off his mask, He smiled.
“Oh you know! Watching the life drain from peoples eyes and what not as they beg for their life! The usual.”
“Oh.. that's.. fun?”
“Extremely liberating stuff.”
Watching as he began to strip, He swallowed, wishing he'd leave already so he could finish shoving the claw back into his skin.
Let me step a little bolder
I don't wanna
Choose between being a butcher or a pauper
“You wanna take a shower with me?” He asked, Beginning to walk around butt naked in nothing but his tags.
“U-uhm… No. No thanks, I had one this morning.”
“D'awwww what? Worried i'll see your peanuts? News flash baby, I've had those things down my throat! And I will say. They're better salty anyways~”
All this teasing changed his monotone face into a small goofy smile as he came close, crawling up into his lap, taking hold of his cheeks as he kissed his nose.
“What's wrong? Did you not get the job?”
He was so envious of how he could say such dirty things. Wade was so confident and yet so shy about his face. It made him think of when he was that confident in himself too. (Probably overly confident if we're being honest) Oh that was so many years ago… he'd never get that back. And honestly? He wasn't sure if he wanted to.
Logan said nothing but it was all the answer wade needed.
“I see. Well you'll get’em next time, Right?”
He looked away. Ashamed. Here Wade was, being overly supportive, giving him everything, and still he couldn't find a single happy bone in his body.
Shifting his leg to reassure him more, His knee was placed on the claw, yipping. “Ouch!”
“Sorry! I… I can't.. i-it won't..”
And on top of all that, he just hurt him. Man he sucked at this. All of it. Every little bit of it.
Pulling his hand away, Logan's eyes looked over Wade just as quick as it happened, Trying to see if he was bleeding only to jolt.
“Hey- shh.. Calm down. You're alright.” Grabbing his wrist, he carefully moved the tags that had gotten stuck on the claw.
“What's got you all riled up, Kitty? The interview couldn't have been that bad.”
But what he didn't know is that it WAS that bad.
Instantly Logan broke down, breaking heavily as he began to sob, gritting his teeth as he put his non-stuck hand on his face, wanting to hide. He felt pathetic. Useless. Weak. All of the things he fought not to be.
“Ooh, Honey come her-” Wade reached a hand out, trying to console him only to be shoved away.
“Don't!! I-.. I'm tired of hurting people! That's not who I want to be!”
“Baby cakes, it was an accident-”
“No!! Eveyone wants the Wolverine until the fucking wolverine is actually acting like the Wolverine!” He shouted, trying not to choke on his own tears.
Tilting his head, Wade blinked as if he wasn't aware of what he was talking about, but why would he? Logan hasn't told him anything negative for the past 2 weeks. Keeping it all bottled up, trying to push it deep down but that wasn't him. He couldn't handle it anymore.
“Everyone just keeps saying I should join the X-men again and i-” Wilson put his hands on his shoulders, looking at him with the most serious he has ever been in his entire life.
“Logan, If that's what you want we'll make it work. It's only an hour drive, and i'm sure I could visi-”
“Wade!! Shut. Up! I don't…” He trailed off, shaking his head as he began to apologize, whispering he was sorry for yelling at him.
“I-it's not your fault.. I.. I don't..”
Wade was patient, Nodding, encouraging him to open up with his words. He knew when it was time to zip it and let him talk. Now was one of those times. It was his turn to listen.
“I don't want to fight anymore. I didn't want to fight to begin with but… It's the only thing I'm good at. I'm not good at anything else.. My whole life I've just been jumping team after team and they all eventually die or I just get kicked out for not understanding the power of team work or whatever. Hell, I've been through three different wars and every single time I ran away! Like a damn dog with its tail between its legs! All except the times I was TOLD to run and I didn't. Fuck, Wade! 3 fucking wars and I can't even take orders right!!”
Honey, I'm taking no orders
Gonna be nobody’s soldier
It was now Wade's turn to try to stifle a laugh, snorting as he covered his mouth.
“What's so fucking funny?! That your boyfriend is a sad pathetic loser who can't even get his hands to listen to him!?”
Now he burst out laughing, starting to giggle.
“You're over here talking about not being able to take orders and not being good enough for a team while talking to the same guy who can't even GET on a team and was kicked out of Canadian special forces because I didn't listen to a single thing they said! And you think I care if you ‘can't take orders’ ??” He said this last part in a mocking tone, trying hard to be serious but couldn't.
Logan's eyebrows scrunched with a skeptical glare, tears still dripping down his face, feeling embarrassed and stupid.
Cupping his face again, Wade smiled ear to ear, their foreheads together. “You're much dumber than the comics make you out to be if you think I'd care about anything like that. You honestly think I'd care if you don't want to be anyone's soldier? Why do you think I'm my own boss? The world isn't built for guys like us, baby. And if you wanna open a coffee shop or- pursue your dreams of photography, or hell! Even bird watching for all I care, I will still love you. We will make it work. No matter what you choose to do. Even if you don't get a job at all. Do you understand?”
The man started into his eyes, seemingly frozen as he processed all that he said.
“Logan..”
“Hm?”
“You gotta nod hon, we've talked about this.”
Slowly nodding, indicating that he understood, the tears got thicker as he pulled himself into Wade's shoulder, sobbing more.
“Oooh There there… There's my big strong man..” Wrapping his arms around him, he was careful of the single knife still out. Sitting him up, he rubbed the side of his face as he kissed the other cheek, only to gasp.
“GAASSSPP!! Peanut!”
“What!?” His grip tightened around his waist as he looked around urgently, immediately sniffling and starting to wipe his eyes.
“You're getting greys!” He coed, reaching up to pluck a single gray hair from the beast, who flinched. “Ouch..”
Leaning back, Wade held the hair in front of his face, His smile still wider than ever.
“You're turning into A silver fox, wolvie!”
“W-what?”
“Ooh I bet you're gonna be so handsome! Eehh!” Hugging him again, tight around his neck.
Blushing, He wasn't sure what had just happened. How him venting and crying out of the rage he felt to Wade fangirling over one of his single hairs.. though.. I guess it made sense for your bald boyfriend to monitor yours. Wade has even made him start using a fancy shampoo that made his hair a lot softer, curlier, and Less greasy.
“.. you..You're excited that i'm getting old..??”
“Duh! I've always wanted to be a hot silver daddy's sugar baby!”
“What does that even mean?”
“Don't worry about it- Oh hey look! Your claw went back in.”
Looking at his hand, he made a fist and opened it a couple of times, blinking, oblivious. “...How did you do that?”
But what he didn't realize is that the stress was flowing out of him, and the relief that Wade seemed to be obsessed with him no matter what had calmed him down enough for it to slide back in itself.
“I didn't do anything, sweetheart. You opened up. Let it out. All that stress isn't good for you, you know. How do you think I ended up looking like this?” He joked, giggling.
For some reason, He laughed too, finding this a bit funny.
“Do you feel better? Hm?”
“Nngh..”
“I'll take that as a yes.” The naked man whispers, kissing him with his arms lazily on his shoulders, glad that he was able to cry in front of him. Twas a very manly thing to do and there was no one more manly than the Wolverine himself.
“Alright. I'm gonna go shower. I stink worse than you do after being out in the rain.” You know, wet dog and all. Pulling away, there was a clang and a tug at both of their necks, the tags becoming stuck together, making wade smirk more. “I think these tags don't want me to go.”
Quickly frowning, Logan swallowed, moving to take his off, pulling up his hand as he held it, putting the tag inside of it, closing his fingers.
“Wha..I-... what are you doing?”
“Wade.. I..” He sighs, looking away with a nervous pout, Grunting a bit from frustration. Why did words have to be so difficult?
“Are you breaking up with me?!”
“What!? No! I-.. I don't..”
See what Logan didn't know was that Wade had viewed these as promise rings, the equivalent of engagement even but he was okay with never actually getting married. As long as he got to wear the dress in his closet and dance with him he wouldn't mind if it was legal or not. He understood fully that not everyone wanted to marry the stage 4 cancer patient whose skin looked like turkey bacon that was somehow raw and burnt at the same time.
“You don't what? Do you.. want something else? We can get rings! Do you want rings?” shifting to sit closer to him, Wade was obviously becoming upset about this, untangling the tags and looking at him with those big brown puppy eyes.
“Rings…?”
He could see the gears in his head trying their best to turn as he thought what he meant.
“How would we make them into rings?” He finally asks and to Wade, this was basically a proposal.
Sitting up more he began clapping excitedly the same way he did when seeing puppins again about 8 months ago. “Eeh!! Yes!!”
His head turns, Giggling. “I would've taken it in front of the subway like Sanda Bullock but this works too!”
Logan, like a dumb ass, looked too, knowing full well he wouldn't see anyone but still always looked anyway. “Who??”
“Oh I'll show you later! What size are you?”
“In rings?”
“No, your cock, Of course in rings!”
“Hey now- I never agreed to a cock ring, Wade. No.”
The serious tone and the way he pointed his finger at him made him laugh more, taking his hand as he kissed it. “We'll figure it out. Okay so after my shower, I'll call a guy I know. I think Forge would do a much better job but I feel like he'd say no.” He began rambling about how cute they would be and how excited he was, climbing off of his lap (finally) and started to walk off.
“W-wade!” He called, swallowing again, nervous to ask him to listen.
“What? You wanna come shower?”
“No- well.. maybe but..”
Again he waited, rocking back and forth on his heels, trying his best to be patient but it was hard not talking for 0.5 seconds.
“It's not that.. I don't like them. It's just.. I got those a long long time ago.. and I don't want to be the man those belonged to. Not anymore. And it's not that I don't think about rejoining all the time, it's just.. I want to live my life the way I want too. Charles always said that at the end, we'd get to live how we deserve. That's my time. My time is now. I want to sit on a porch somewhere out west and watch the horses graze. I wanna sit around doing nothing with Puppins in my arms. I want… I want to be with.. with you.”
He admitted, and for once Wade was the one speechless.
“I don't want you to visit. I want to live with you. But not here. I want to go somewhere quieter. Somewhere I can just be.. Logan..”
Putting a hand on his chest as he explained, he didn't see his smile move, not a smidge, watching as he bit his lip and covered his mouth trying to stay quiet until he was done.
“Of course I still want to help people though! Protect them from other worse people… I'm just tired of being someone's toy soldier all the time. I want to do what I think is right but.. also have time to listen to you sing when cooking and take Puppins to the dog park. I want to protect..Us.” Yeah. That felt right. Us. Both of them, all of them. Together. His family.
“B-besides.. If I became an X-men again I don't think I could do it. I could barely sleep back then thinking about all the screams.. the people I couldn't help. I don't think I would be able to get over the fact that I can't save everyone… But I definitely want to try to at least save a few people. Take care of them… all of them. Even if they don't think they need help.” He smiled a bit, taking a huge breath as the stress was relieved from his shoulders.
“Alright you can talk now because I'm never doing that ever again, that was super embarrassing.” He muttered, flushed as he looked down at his lap.
The second he gave him permission to speak, Wade screamed, a scream that made Logan's eyes widen and look at him with a slow blink. “....what was tha-”
Immediately he was pulled up from the bed, picked up and squeezed tightly as he jumped around. Grunting some, he held on tight, feeling a little nauseous. Sometimes it was easy to forget how strong he was.
Still screaming, Wade was extremely excited about all that was just said, Logan admitting that he wanted a serious future with him was a lot better news than he could have ever wished for.
“Put me down!... Wade!... I'm gonna throw up!” He said, whining that he was given uppies non consensually. Even he couldn't help but laugh though in response to his giggles. God that laugh was so annoying and yet his world would feel pointless without it.
Putting him down, Wilson grabs his cheeks, petting his beard. “Ooh Logan.. I don't need protection.. because I can't get pregnant. But if I ever find out that I can, I'll definitely hire you.” He jokes, causing more blushes as his hand comes up to Wades, nuzzling into it for a moment.
“You know what I mean…”
“I do. And while I won't stop you, how about you be your own soldier for a bit? Tell yourself how to live. Not anyone else. And i'll be behind you, wearing a shirt with your ugly mug on it, supporting you the whole way. Got it?”
“Aye! I'm not ugly!”
“No you are not! I've barely been home for 20 minutes and am already so wet. I haven't even taken a shower yet “ he mumbles casually as he begins walking away.
“Heh.. Hey…erm Wade?”
“Yes, love?” Just about to leave the room, he turns, smiling gently at how talkative his fiancé was.
Logan blushes more. “I uhm.. If I'm nobody's soldier… can your name be nobody?”
Wade looks confused at first, now it's his turn to figure out what he was saying.
“Cause.. if your name is nobody then i'd be.. nevermind.” Waving A hand, he glanced at his shoes, stuffing his hands in his pocket having just fumbled that line completely.
Within seconds, Wade was back in that room, giving him the sloppiest, deepest kiss that was available, kissing him all over.
“Oh Logie! You're so sweet! But leave the flirting to me, mkay? I don't need you throwing your back out trying too hard.” He pats his chest, grabbing his hand as Wade drug him by the wrist.
They both laugh as they enter the bathroom, closing the door with a click.
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tossawary · 1 year ago
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The last time that I rewatched "The Fellowship of the Ring" (extended edition, of course), my favorite new detail that I noticed is that the characters, once they set out on their journey, are pretty much always traveling from screen-left to screen-right.
It had been a few years since I'd seen the films and I'd learned more about filmmaking in that time. I'm completely biased regarding the LOTR films; they're not perfect, but I grew up on them, I love them. I was trying to take notes on all of the little details that made the world of the films seem so rich and so enchanting to me. The camerawork, character staging, and editing is one of the many things that just happened to jump out at me at this time.
When Frodo and Sam are leaving the Shire, the camera is set up in such a way that they start on the left side of the screen (<- that side) and travel across it to the right side of the screen (-> that side).
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This way to go the farthest you've ever been from home. ->
As the hobbits travel from Bree to Rivendell, as the Fellowship travels from Rivendell to the Misty Mountains, all of those gorgeous scenic shots of the Nine Walkers show them moving from screen-left to screen-right. I haven't rewatched the entire trilogy lately, but in "The Fellowship of the Ring", it is so beautifully consistent.
There are a handful of reasons why this is done. In staging and editing, consistency regarding where the characters are placed on the screen is a storytelling tool. For example: the "180 degrees rule" says to generally keep the camera on one side of the characters within a scene, so that the audience can mentally keep track of the characters within the environment and focus on the action/dialogue. If we're watching two characters talking in a diner, even in the close-ups, one character will usually be kept on screen-left and be shown facing screen-right, and the other will be kept on screen-right and be shown facing screen-left. It feels stable. (People will sometimes choose to break the "180 degrees rule". It can be a tool to create a sense of disorientation and/or instability in the audience.)
In "The Fellowship of the Ring", the maps that the audience is shown of Middle Earth tell us that the Shire is located in the West (left side of the map) and everything else of relevance (Rivendell, Moria, Rohan, Gondor, Mordor) is East (right side of the map). As the characters consistently travel screen-right, the audience builds up a firmer mental map of Middle Earth and can better keep track of the characters' progress on their long journey. With every step that Frodo takes towards screen-right (->), we know that he is traveling East, taking another step towards Mordor.
Left to right may also instinctively feel like the way forward in a culture that writes and reads from left to right. Regardless of which way you write: if your film establishes extremely consistently that one direction is forward, then this visual language can be used to tell the audience that something is wrong if the characters start traveling from right to left. They might be lost! It builds suspense in the visual depiction of the characters going backwards and undoing progress! This all suits the lengthy hero's journey of LOTR very well, in my opinion.
There's an old joke that knowing how anything is made ruins the magic, and another old joke that knowing anything about filmmaking makes you insufferable to watch movies with, but I've never felt that way, especially not here. How does that quote go? It's still magic even if you know how it's done. (GNU Terry Pratchett.)
I find it enchanting, honestly, that so many people can work so hard for an effect that can seem so simple. Actors, directors, camera operators, editors, storyboarders, and so many others on the crew of the films consistently placed characters, sets, and props just so! So that the audience could more easily keep track of where everyone was and lose themselves a little more deeply in the story.
It's such a simple rule! And it works so well! Left -> Right. West -> East. Shire -> Mordor. Home -> Adventure. Known -> Unknown.
I personally recommend trying to keep track of character movement across the screen in films, especially if you have any interest in visual storytelling (films or illustration or something else). It's fun! It's impossible for me to unsee, watching "The Fellowship of the Ring" now, and I think it's a wonderful piece of movie magic.
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holylulusworld · 11 days ago
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A very Lloyd Christmas
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Summary: Lloyd is Lloyd, even during Christmas.
Pairing: Lloyd Hansen x fem!Reader
Warnings: Christmas mood, language, fluff, naughty Lloyd, pregnant reader
Catch up here: Flowery peace offering
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“A little to the left, Lloyd,” you say while your boyfriend tries to put up another Christmas decoration. You’re six months pregnant, and he won’t allow you to lift a finger. “Yes, that’s perfect.” You clap your hands and smile. “You’re getting better.”
“I’m the master in decorating,” Lloyd purrs. He stalks toward you to grab you by your waist. You giggle when he dips you low to give you the perfect movie kiss. “…and kissing my girl.”
“Lloyd,” you squeal and giggle. “We have a lot more on our plate. You must put the tree up. I must decorate it. Pushing against his shoulders, you try to make him stop. “LLOYD!”
“Later,” he purrs against your lips, “I’ll devour your mouth and your pretty pussy. Lloyd Jr. will get some company…”
“Lloyd,” you huff and slap his shoulders. “That sounded wrong on so many levels!”
He smirks before nuzzling your cheek. “Cupcake, I was joking. I won’t share your pretty pussy with anyone. Never.”
You groan loudly. Lloyd was always possessive when it came to you. It only got worse when he found out that you were expecting his child.
“Now my sweet Muffin will sit on the couch and have warm tea. I’ll bring the tree inside and put it up for you.” Lloyd kisses your cheek, making you giggle even harder. “If you tell anyone I decorated the house, you’ll get your cute ass spanked.”
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Lloyd grunts, dragging the huge Christmas tree inside the house. “Move, you little bastard. I saved you from that Cat Lady’s greedy hands. You better cooperate, or I’ll break you into two halves.”
You giggle. Lloyd is fighting with a tree, only for you. He’s still a Grinch when it comes to Christmas, decorations, or gifts, but he makes an exception for you. Only for you.
“There you go, bastard,” Lloyd put his hands on his hips, towering over the tree. The green beauty lies on the ground, waiting for Lloyd to put it up. “Wait for it. I’ll put you up and decorate you. Give up, or you’ll suffer.”
“Lloyd, stop threatening our Christmas tree,” you warn. “We don’t want it to die and turn brown because you threaten it.”
“Muffin, I only tried to tame the tree. I’ve got this.” He grunts when lifting the tree to put it into the tree stand. “Fuck, it doesn’t fit.”
You snort, a rare gleam of mischief in your eyes. “That’s what I said the first time you tried to put it in too.” 
Lloyd snickers at your words. “I remember Cupcake. You whined and told me it won’t fit.” He looks at you, hunger in his eyes. “I made it fit, though.”
“Lloyd, the tree,” you say to stop him from getting naughty. “No funny business until you put it up.”
He grins. “Oh, baby, let me put it up…” Lloyd wiggles his eyebrows. “I’ll put it up so good, you’ll scream my name in no time.”
You put your hands on your belly, slowly rubbing it. “Not before the Christmas tree is finished, Mr. Hansen.”
“Oh, you’re playing hard to get,” he half-laughs. “Fine, I’ll take care of the tree first.” Lloyd tries to put the tree up again, only to fail. “It’s too big.”
You giggle again.
Lloyd huffs. “Muffin, that’s not funny. It’s too big and won’t fit. I need to cut it. Let me bring it back outside and get the chainsaw.”
“Why can’t you do it inside the house? It’s cold outside, and you’ll freeze,” you sniffle. “I don’t want you to freeze.”
“Cupcake, I love you, but that was the dumbest thing you ever said.”
“Hey!” You grunt. “I was worried about you.”
“—and I love you for it, but cutting the tree inside the house, using a chainsaw, means the house will look like a battlefield. And it will stink.”
“Okay,” you sigh deeply. “But be careful. I don’t want you to lose a pinky or something.” You point at his hands. “You know I love your hands.”
He grins like the pervert he is. “’Cause you love my hands, baby doll. All over your body, inside of it, slapping your ass.”
“Lloyd, the tree!”
“On its way…”
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“I think this looks great.” You walk around the tree, inspecting Lloyd’s work. “I like the colors, and the lights are pretty.” You take a closer look at one of the ornaments, choking on your spit. “What is that?”
“What is it, Cupcake?” Lloyd tries to sound innocent, knowing all too well what you’re talking about. He dips his head to watch you point at the ornament. “Oh, I bought it. It’s new.”
“That’s a dick!” You huff. “Lloyd, why is there a dick on my tree?”
“Because if it was inside the tree, it’d be kinky,” he replies with a straight face. “It makes the tree look manlier.”
“Lloyd, it’s a dick!” You try to argue, but snort instead. It’s a cute little dick, with tiny balls dangling from your tree.
“If you find them all,” he says and cups his crotch, “you’ll get the real one…”
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lovebugism · 2 years ago
Note
hi! not sure if you’re still taking requests but if u are may i request the prompt “it’s okay to cry in front of me, you know. you don’t have to carry this alone.” with reader comforting steve? tysm <3
bug's blurb sleepover (⁎˃ᴗ˂⁎)!
Steve tends to feel things really, really deeply.
When Nancy called him bullshit at a Halloween party and ran off with the weird kid from chemistry class a day later, he felt like it was the end of the world. His world, at least. 
He thought it was going to stick with him for the rest of his life — that she was right, that he really was bullshit, and that that truth would haunt him forever. It did. It does. It lurks over his shoulder sometimes, like a shadow or a sleeping dragon.
And when Robin’s mad at him, like mad mad, it makes him feel like dying. 
One time he overestimated how tired he was after a shift and forgot to pick Robin up after band practice. He was startled awake from his nap out of nowhere, like his brain knew he’d done something wrong, and realized he was supposed to drive her home over an hour ago. 
He found her standing with her trumpet case under the awning in a futile attempt to hide from the pouring rain. She didn’t talk to him for days — not during the drive, not at work the next day, not until he was milliseconds from groveling at her feet for her forgiveness.
But it’s different when he’s happy. He’s got you and he’s got Dustin, and he loves the two of you so much it feels like he might burst sometimes. Adoration spills from his pores like so many little rays of sunshine, leaves him a grinning and gushing thing in the place of a teenage boy. 
It’s so much worse with you, though. Because sometimes he feels like his heart beats only for you — that it follows the rhythm of your pulse, that it will stop when yours does. 
He can taste every word that spills from your mouth, the one’s coated in venom and honey alike. He can hear every sound of your soul, too. It’s the crackles of an old record player when you’re content, autumn leaves crunching when you’re angry, and the sounds of a deep, deep ocean when you’re sad.
You’re embedded into every fiber of his being. You’ve entwined yourself with him without even realizing it, tucked yourself into the outer regions of his bleeding heart with a fuzzy blanket and a good book — no sign of leaving any time soon.
He loves you hard, too hard. So hard there’s no breath without you.
So when Vecna almost kills you, it feels a little like his life is ending.
He watches you float in midair, his feet still stuck on the ground, totally helpless. 
Tears spill from your glazed-over eyes and glitter beneath streams of moonlight. Your body is slack, but your fingers tremble and your brows twitch and your chin quivers. You’re not all there, but you can feel every ounce of fear like an ice-cold bath, painful and numbing all at once. Because you know that you’re going to die. And that there’s nothing anyone else can do to stop it.
Dustin shouts for help into his supercomm, begs for Max to bring her walkman or steal the nearest boombox they see and bring it with them to Lover’s Lake. They’re too far away, though, on the other side of town in Nancy’s too slow Station Wagon picking up more hunting supplies to kill the son of a bitch trying to kill you. He knows they won’t make it in time.
Steve shakes your shoulders and shouts in your face, but you still don’t wake. He keeps a hold of you until you’re out of his reach entirely — rising and rising and rising until you’re six feet off the ground. Then he’s just begging, shouting pleas up at you, at god, at Vecna — the shriveled skin creep doing this to you. 
“Please,” he shouts to everyone and no one all at once. “Please, just— you gotta wake up, okay? I’ll be better, I’ll be so much better, I promise. I’ll listen to all the music you like, watch all the movies you want — even the ones that suck — I’ll be a better boyfriend, okay? You just— You need to wake up!”
You don’t. 
You just keep on crying, like you can hear him in whatever world Vecna’s sucked you into. Eyes fluttering, neck jerking, lips trembling. You succumb completely to the monster’s curse.
It’s Eddie that saves you.
He rushes to the stolen R.V. for his guitar, the one Steve said made him look like he was overcompensating for something, the one that’s about to save your life. “What’s her favorite song?” the boy urges as he slips the strap over his head with pale and trembling fingers.
Steve looks over at his shoulder at him. It’s hard to see through the stinging tears. “Wh— What—” He can’t form words. Or thoughts, really. The only thing going through his head is that you’re about to die, that he’s about to lose you forever. It clouds his mind like thick black smoke.
“Her favorite song?” Eddie snaps. “What is it?”
He scrambles to answer. “Uh, it’s uh— it’s Take— Take On Me… Do you know that one?”
“No,” the boy answers honestly. “But I can try.”
That’s all they can do for now. Try. Hope.
He puts his fingers to the strings, trying to find the right placements, but it’s hard when you don’t know how to play the song and you’re shaking that you’re fucking freezing. Eddie’s forced to play it by ear and tells Steve that it won’t sound exactly right and that it won’t be loud without his amp. 
It takes him a moment to find the melody, but Steve hears it the second it comes — the synth-y da-da-da-dum, da-da-dah, da-da-da-da-dum’s that were practically engrained in his psyche after he heard it on the radio the millionth time.
You weren’t as afflicted by the earworm as he was. You loved it. 
The song came out the year the two of you started dating, so all he heard for months was that catchy beat and even catchier falsetto. You played it on the jukebox when you went to the diner, popped the tape into your radio whenever he was over at your place, requested for it to be played virtually wherever you went.
You hear the song from where you’re stuck in your own head. The strums of the guitar are quiet and a little out of tune, but the uncanny notes make sense when you’re trapped in a world that isn’t really your world. Suddenly you don’t see Vecna or his claw in your face — just Steve, Steve, Steve.
He’s with you at the diner with whipped cream on his chin, making fun of you for singing to the song so off-key. He’s with you in your childhood bedroom, spinning you around and singing all the high notes with you. He’s with you at Enzo’s, the fanciest place in Hawkins for your anniversary, and slips the mini-orchestra a hundred-dollar bill to play the song for you.
Suddenly, you’re on the ground again — back in Hawkins — and gasping for breath in his arms. You can’t see him from where he’s got his face tucked into your neck, but you can feel the scarily rapid beat of his heart and the way it matches your own.
Steve sobs into you, uncaring about how loud he is or how his snot and tears stain your t-shirt. Because he almost fucking lost you. And, for a split second, he tried to think of what a life without you would look like. He quickly came up short. There was nothing — no light, no sound, no music — just darkness. A void. 
Sometimes, he thinks he would’ve died with you that night.
Vecna is dead within the next twenty-four hours after the fact. You and Nancy take turns shooting bullets in the pale patchy skin of his chest where his heart’s supposed to be while Steve and Robin throw hand-made bombs in his direction. He trips and stumbles out the window while the rotting basement erupts into flames. There’s nothing left but ashes.
Steve doesn’t feel a thing for a little while after that, just the acute urge to protect the group of you even though the boogeyman is long gone. 
He doesn’t let go of you for days, always holding onto some part of you, because he’s terrified of you slipping away again. 
He lets Dustin sleep at his place when the boy asks, but it’s for his own peace of mind more than anything else. He doesn’t let the boy out of his sight until his mom gets concerned about him. 
He drives forty-five minutes to the hospital every day for two weeks with you so you can visit Max and Lucas, always with two peanut butter jelly sandwiches for them — just in case.
He’s on auto-pilot for a while. He just keeps on taking care of everyone else because it distracts him from himself — from his own inner turmoil, from the horrors he saw that night, from the boogeyman still in his closet.
It takes you a month for you to tell him what you saw. You were a lot like him in that way, still trying to hide from it all. You would’ve been more than happy if you could squish your great big problem into a tiny little ball that you could stomp underneath your feet and forget about completely. 
But that’s not how life works. 
The thing just swells and swells and swells until it takes everything in you to stay sane.
You sit Steve down on his bed and curl into his lap — knees to your chest, head tucked beneath his chin. And you tell him about it. Everything.
You tell him that Vecna showed you Brad, the boyfriend you had before Steve. It was a replay of the last night you saw him parked at Lover’s Lake, the very same place you had been when Vecna almost took you. You’re sitting in his passenger seat and he’s trying to feel you up. “Billy’s girlfriend lets him fuck her all the time,” he gripes when you swat his hand from your thigh.
“Then maybe go fuck Billy’s girlfriend,” you shoot back. 
It’s the last thing you’d ever said to him before storming off and catching the late bus back home. He went missing the next day; his car still there, but no sign of the boy himself.
Vecna shows you everything you’d been making yourself sick over for years, tells you exactly what happened to him that night.
A demogorgon appears in thin air and snatches the boy, takes him to the Upside Down like he’s some kind of light night snack. The thing doesn’t eat him, though, just plays with its food for a while until it gets bored and lets him rot. Brad was down there, for days, beggingfor someone to save him. Help never came, though. Just the slow, slow hand of death. 
“You never even looked for him…” you recite the words Vecna said to you, voice much softer than his cruel baritone one. “You let him rot down there while you threw yourself at a boy that didn’t even want you…”
Steve eyes squeeze shut then, like he’s trying to hide from your words. It’s about as effective as those idiots in horror movies who try to hide under their bedsheets from demons.
You sought refuge in Steve that night and many others, when Brad was acting especially douchebag-y. It was innocent at first. He was your friend. But somewhere down the line, you realized that you had bigger feelings for him than you ever did for your boyfriend. Steve, meanwhile, was still caught in the web of his complicated feelings for Nancy.
It wasn’t until you got kidnapped by Russian soldiers that he realized how much he loved you.
There’s just something about the end of the world that makes a person see clearly again.
Everything seems to hit him exactly a week later. 
He’d done a pretty good job at hiding it all — the nightmares, the panic attacks, the sleepless nights. He hid that all from you because you were recovering too. He didn’t think it was fair to dump all his hurt on you while you were still trying to get back to normal.
You noticed it very quickly, though, that Steve didn’t seem to be very affected by any of it. 
He was so nonchalant about everything, the kind of casual only a person who was aching could pull off. 
And he’d get real reserved at times, uncharacteristically quiet, and you’d ask him if he was okay. He’d scoffed and say he was fine —of course I’m okay, what do you mean? — while his cheek speckled with red and he blinked back glassy tears. 
You’d try to hug him and he’d let you, but kept shrugging off your concern — I’m fine, babe. I promise. I’m not the one who almost died.
Steve did that a lot. Made it seem like his problems didn’t mean as much because they weren’t as big as yours or Max’s or Eddie’s. He convinced himself that they didn’t. Why should he be upset when he didn’t have to meet the monster face to face or live through something traumatic all over again? What does he have to cry about?
But when he sleeps all he sees in you — in that spot at Lover’s Lake, succumbing to Vecna’s curse, while the rest of them try like hell to bring you back. In his nightmares, they never do. He watches your bones break one by one, piercing cracks in the quiet night that he can feel in his chest, before you fall limply to the ground again.
He wakes with a gasping breath, the same way you had all the time ago. You’re sleeping peacefully beside him, hair wild and face smushed into your pillow, but he can’t seem to get the vision out of his head — of your mangled body and sucked-out sockets. He stumbles off to the bathroom on tired and trembling legs.
You wake to the door slamming shut and stir at the sound of the faucet turning on. 
Light spills from the crack underneath the door, bright in the darkness of your bedroom. You watch Steve’s shadow with bleary eyes, how it stands in one place for a moment and then paces back and forth.
Wiping sleep from your eyes, you tiptoe to the door, but don’t do anything when you reach it. You just wait, listen. 
Steve mumbles something to himself that you can’t quite make out — you’re okay, stop being such a baby, jesus… is all you can hear. He sniffles as his feet pad the length of the tiled bathroom floor. It doesn’t take a genius to know that he’s crying.
Your knock upon the door is a soft one. You don’t want to startle him. The second he realizes you’re outside the door, he freezes.
“Stevie…” you call gently out for him. “Are you okay?”
He clears his throat. “Yeah—” Then again. “Yeah, I’m fine… Go back to bed.”
“Are you sure?” you press. “Do you want me to get anything for you?”
The boy has to take a deep breath in to stop himself from snapping at you. He’s angry at himself more than anything — for hiding, for failing at hiding. He runs two anxious hands through his hair and plants himself along the ceramic edge of the bathtub. 
“I’m sure. Just… Just go back to bed, okay?”
You don’t listen. You just slide along the door frame until you’re sat on the carpeted floor of your bedroom. Steve can hear your shuffling outside.
“It’s okay if you’re not okay. You know that, right?” you ask him through the door.
Steve puts his face in his hands before he can catch his scrunching face in the mirror. Just when he thought he wasn’t going to cry, here you come, pulling this shit. 
“I know,” he answers tightly, muffled through his palms. He rubs them up and down his face once, twice, and then a third time before throwing his hands into his lap. “But I’m fine, okay? Seriously.”
“You can cry in front of me, Steve. It’s okay. You don’t have to— You don’t have to go through this shit alone, you know? I’m here. I’m right here, okay? Let me help you.”
It’s that reminder that does him in; the assurance that you’re here and not a disfigured mess in the tall grass of Lover’s Lake. A sob spills from his mouth too abruptly for him to stop it.
“Steve…” you call for him again, heartbreaking on the other side of the door.
“I’m almost lost you,” he cries, more than himself than to you, then sniffles. “I’m almost fucking lost you.”
“But you didn’t. I’m still here. And I’m not going anywhere, Steve Harrington. The universe is gonna have to try a whole lot harder to keep me away from you.”
He manages a laugh through his tears. “It’s not funny.”
“I’m not joking,” you quip. “If Vecna couldn’t stop me from being with you, nothing will.”
The thought of that warms him. He realizes it’s not the universe keeping the two of you together, not fate or some higher power in the clouds. It’s love. It’s all the love the two of you have got for each other, stronger than any demogorgon or Russian soldier or dark wizard. And it’s love that’s gonna hold the two of you together for the next several decades, until you’re old and wrinkly and ugly. 
But Steve won’t think you’re ugly. He’ll think you’re as beautiful as the first moment he saw you — throwing up in the bushes outside Tina’s house after your first high school party.
You rise quickly when the door opens. Steve stands in front of you, eyes puffy and face red and smiling gently down at you anyway. “I love the shit outta you, you know that?” is all he can think to say. Because that’s all that he feels in that moment.
“Of course, I know that,” you grin up at him. Your hands rise to cup his jaw, thumbs swiping at his tear-stained cheeks. Your browns pinch in concern. “You okay?”
For the first time, he’s honest.
“No…” he murmurs with the soft shake of his head. His eyes dart away from yours and to the floor where his and your twenty toes stand, still on the ground, not floating in thin air.
“No— I… I don’t think I am,” he confesses softly. His tired, sad, and heavy honey eyes flit back up to yours again. “But I will be.”
You nod until your words catch up to you. “Yeah. Yeah, you will.”
“If only out of pure spite of all the monsters to all the monsters trying to destroy our lives.”
“They’re gone now,” you promise, like a parent who’s checked under their child’s bed for shadows and ghosts. It works well enough. Here, with his face in your hands and standing in your shared bedroom, he’s never felt safer.
“Can you… Can you hold me?” he wonders, a little meekly because he feels like an idiot saying them. Then he feels even more like an idiot for feeling like an idiot. You’re his girlfriend, after all, cuddles sort of came with the package.
“Of course,” you answer without thinking twice. You grab his hand and tug him back to the bed almost immediately. “I’ll hold you for the rest of our fucking lives, Harrington, you know that.”
The two of you settle into the mattress. Steve uses you like a pillow, wraps all of his limbs around you and tucks his face into your neck. Your scent is a familiar one, warm and comforting, like home. “I like the sound of that,” he mumbles into your shoulder after a moment of quiet.
“Well, buckle in, baby. ‘Cause I got you for the next, like, six decades.”
You feel his smile form against your skin as Steve tucks himself inside your soul.
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lovestay-channie · 1 year ago
Text
Hugs - Seungmin
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Pairing: Seungmin x fem!reader
Genre: fluff with a lil angst
Summary: y/n is feeling touch starved, and feeling the need of some comfort. all she wants is a hug.
Word Count: 1.7k
Warning: reader feels sad, in need of comfort, reader has a crush on Seungmin,
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Sometimes there are days where you just need a hug, but you don’t want to ask because it’s weird. Right? Who asks for hugs unless you need comfort, meeting someone after a long time, or saying goodbye. You can’t just ask for a hug.
Sure, maybe you did need some comfort, but someone just holding you for a moment in time sounded refreshing.
Who could you even ask to give you a hug? You thought about it for a while. The thought kept creeping back into your mind every now and then for a week. It was like your heart and soul was crying for a touch of love.
Seungmin, your best friend and secret crush, was over for a movie night. He is quite an observant person. Sometimes he could read you like an open book. It a few glances to tell how you really feel. There have been many moments in your friendship where he could tell you were in an uncomfortable situation, and he tagged along with you so you weren’t alone. He was truly remarkable.
Your eyes were laser focused into the movie, but your mind was completely elsewhere. You didn’t even notice that Seungmin was watching you half the time trying to read your mind. He was convinced something was wrong. Normally, when watching a movie, your feet are propped up on his thighs, yet instead your legs are tucked underneath you with your arms wrapped around them. You were completely on your side of the couch and not in his space.
Next thing you know, the movie is paused. You snap your head towards Seungmin, “Why did you pause?”
You didn’t expect his whole body to be facing you sitting criss cross. He had the remote still pointed to the TV. You could see his eyes examining your whole body. “Why are you looking at me like that? Do you need something?”
“Yes.”
You didn’t think he was going to answer so suddenly. You hesitate before speaking, “Okaaay? What do you need?”
“Do you swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth?” Seungmin asks while scooting closer to you, making you lean back.
“I’m sorry, but what the hell are you talking about?”
“I need you to promise.”
“Why?”
“Because I know you won’t tell the truth if I don’t pressure you.”
You scoff at his reasoning. He wasn’t lying, but you hated that he was right. He wasn’t trying to be pushy, but he was trying to tell you he knows something is wrong. You don’t talk about yourself. You don’t let people in because it means they can sneak into your heart. However, Seungmin sneaked in a long time ago without even trying.
“Do you need me to grab a bible or something?” you joke.
Seungmin holds up his pinky. He is one to hold pinky promises sacred. It was a special thing between the two of you. “Pinky promise me.”
You sigh deeply knowing that there was no way out of this. You shortly stare at his long pinky thinking of a way to divert his attention to something else, but Seungmin isn’t stupid. Far from it. You glance up into his eyes. They were stern yet soft. He was trying to be careful.
You adjust to criss cross as well and raise your pinky to interlock with his. “Fine. What is it?”
“What’s wrong?”
Your grip on Seungmin’s pinky tightens. All of your senses are heightened. You didn’t realize that your knees were touching his. Or how your leggings were hugging your thighs. Or how tight your ponytail was. For some reason, his question caught you off guard.
“Why?” you ask
“Just answer the question. Something's off. I can smell it,” he sniffs.
He was trying to lighten the mood with a joke. Something you admire about him.
You loosen your grip and bring your hands down between the two of you, pinkies still intertwined.
Your mind is going a million miles an hour, trying to figure out how to explain your feelings. Every way you think you can explain it, it sounds dumb in your brain. It sounds unbelievable. You have to be over reacting. Why is your brain thinking this way? Why can’t you just get over it and move on?
“Hey!” Seungmin’s voice break you out of your thoughts. “Come back to the real world please.”
You let out a breathy chuckle, “Sorry. I just… I don’t know how to explain it very well.”
Seungmin shrugged his shoulders while unhooking your pinky from his. “Try me.”
You already missed his soft touch. You knew you were incredibly touch starved to where holding pinkies made you feel safe. You so badly wanted to reach out for his hand again, but instead, you tuck your hands into your hoodie pockets.
“Do you promise not to judge me?” you question.
Seungmin gently rolled his eyes “When have I ever judged you?” You cocked your head to the side and eyes hooded as he replied to his own question. “Don’t answer that.”
You slightly smirked at his comment. You stare at the space between the two of you for a moment before gaining the courage to speak your mind. “Do… do you ever feel like you just need a hug sometimes?”
You looked up into his puppy like eyes, his head tilted slightly. You couldn’t exactly read his reaction. He looked confused, but he looked like his eyes were filled with admiration. An odd combination.
“I know you don’t like skinship, but past that, do you ever just want someone to hold you?” you explain deeper.
The silence grows between the two of you. All you could hear was your own heart beating out of your chest. The heat grew on your already rosy cheeks.  This was a mistake. He may be your best friend, but being vulnerable with him, or in general, has always been difficult.
“You know what,” you lightly chuckle in embarrassment. “Never mind! It sounds silly anyways. I don’t know even what I’m talking abo-“
Arms are suddenly secured around your shoulders, bringing you to a bony shoulder. The smell of sandalwood and musk surround you just like the arms holding you tight. You could feel Seungmin’s breath on your neck. He was so close to you. Sure, you have hugged before, but this was different. This was a hug full of love. You didn’t realize you were frozen until you felt soft fingers caressing your spine. You slowly take your hands out of your hoodie and wrap your arms around Seungmin’s waist, gripping on to him while relaxing into his body at the same time.
“Needing comfort is never silly, Y/N,” Seungmin whispers.
You bury your head into the crook of his neck from his statement. You could almost feel tears brew in your eyes, but you close your eyes to keep them from falling. Seungmin leaves a sweet, tender kiss on your temple before resting his head onto yours. He starts swaying you back and forth.
The hug lasts for what feels like forever. You could get used to this feeling, Seungmin holding you. It was nice to have someone hold you. Someone to rest upon. The world felt a little lighter, just for a moment.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Seungmin breaks the silence.
You pull away from his grasp to look up at him. He still has his arms around you, afraid to let you go. He scans your face to make sure you are okay. He takes a piece of hair that fell out of your ponytail and tucks it behind your ear. It made your heart swoon. “It’s just been tough lately. That’s all really. I’ve felt stuck. I feel like I’m not enough. Just… the same things over and over again,” you explain.
Seungmin knew well of your struggles and insecurities. Trying to do college and work can be difficult sometimes. On top of that, trying to have a healthy social life and schedule can be hectic. This is the first movie night in 3 weeks because of both busy schedules. Seungmin has been preparing for a comeback while you were in the midst of midterms. Finally having this break was nice, but it came with the overwhelming leftover feelings.
“I’m sorry,” Seungmin frowns, resting his forehead on your shoulder while his hands move to around your waist.
“You have nothing to be sorry for, Min,” you reassure. Your arms adjust to wrap around his shoulders. One hand finds its ways into his soft, silky hair.
Seungmin shakes his head, “Yes I do. You were there for me all last week while you were swamped with exams, yet I didn’t do anything for you. I was so blind in rehearsals and recording sessions that I didn’t see you were struggling.”
“Oh, Min. It’s okay.”
“No, Y/N. It’s not.” Seungmin lifts his head. His face is only several inches away from your face. His eyes dart back and forth from your eyes. “You helping me was a cry for help. Taking time out of your busy week to comfort me was enough to show that you were also struggling. No sane person goes out of their way when they have too much on their plate.”
‘Well, it helps that I’m basically in love with you’ you think.
You have always been a person who helps others before yourself, especially when it comes to helping Seungmin.
“It’s honestly okay. You are here right now. That’s what matters,” you smile, patting his head.
“What can I do for you right now?” he asks.
“How about you just keep holding me? I think that will help me a lot,” you answer.
Seungmin smiles, “I can do that.”
You adjust your position to both of you lying on the couch. Seungmin’s head rests on the arm of the couch with a pillow raising it up slightly. He pulls you on top of him, legs intertwining together. Your head lies on his chest, hearing his heartbeat. Seungmin grabs the remote to continue playing the movie.
“Thank you, Min,” you whisper in his ear.
He tilts his head down to glance at you before pressing his lips to your forehead, “Anytime. I’m always here for you.”
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alottiegoingon · 7 months ago
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fluffy alphabet
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lottie matthews x reader
warnings: suggestive but nothing explicit, bad relationship with parents mentioned, no pronouns used, just fluff overall, not proofread.
there's many versions for this alphabet so i did the one i liked better :)
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affection (how affectionate is she?)
a lot! i think lottie wouldn't be too affectionate at first, probably a little shy, but once she feels comfortable she's always touching you. holding your hand, rubbing your knee or arm, fixing your hair as an excuse to play with your hair. would also say "i love you" a thousand times a day.
best friend (what would lottie be like as a best friend?)
i may be canceled over this but i think lottie would find it difficult to make friends and mantain the friendship right away cause she always had a bad relationship/bad example from her parents. but when you become friends, she would be so sweet. she'd help you to study for finals, invite you over to her house, invite you to go shopping with her (aka stealing).
cuddle (how does lottie like to cuddle?)
big spoon or not, she's happy either way. cuddling after a long day could fix all her problems (maybe not all of them but it would help lots!!)
domestic (how is she at cooking/cleaning...?)
since lottie always had maids and housekeepers, she'd SUCK at cooking and cleaning in my opinion. she'd be able to burn a boiled egg! but then she'd love to learn it with you.
emotions (how does she express her emotions around you?)
lottie would be very open to share her feelings. maybe could feel a bit insecure but she trusts you well enough and you'd always comfort and reassure her.
family (does she want one?)
biiig yes! lottie has a fucked up family, let's be honest. so i think she'd be very happy to have a family of her own, much happier, healthier and supportive than the one she was born into. she'd be SUCH a great mom and wife.
gifts (does lottie like spoiling you?)
do i even have to say anything? she'd spend tons of money on you. taking you to the movies, to fancy restaurants, buying you clothes, books and whatever you need. lottie feels really good when spoiling you with gifts, she loves to see you smile and how shy you get.
honesty (does she have any secrets?)
everyone has their own secrets. for lottie, it was her medication. she felt deeply insecure about it, largely because her parents always stressed how ill she was and that something was fundamentally wrong with her. when lottie decided to share it with you, she was so scared that it made your heart break and you had to tell her multiple times about how amazing, sweet and kind she is and how wrong her parents were for saying those things. taking medication doesn’t define her (or anyone else) as flawed or damaged.
injury (how would she react if you got hurt?)
that girl would go feral if you were in allie's place and had broken your leg. if the plane had crash, she'd go crazy looking for you and making sure that you were safe and alive. during her little antler queen phase, she wouldn't let anyone get too close to you and would NEVER let you go hunt.
jealousy (is she jealous?)
lottie does get jealous but not crazy jealous (unless if she's on shrooms...). if someone was hitting on you, lottie would have her hands all over you, on your waist, hair or hands, telling the person that you have a girlfriend. if they insisted, then she'd probably be pissed and scare them off.
kiss (how does she kiss you? how does she like to be kissed?)
most of the time, she'd be a soft kisser, very gentle. unless you decided to get things a lil more intense, she prefers to kiss/get kissed in those cute slow and passionate kisses from movies. doesn't mean she doesn't like it rough tho...
love (who said ‘I love you’ first?)
that's debatable. either was you or she said it accidentally and blushed at the moment you mentioned it.
memory (what’s her favorite memory of you together?)
something really corny but adorable like spending time together under a tree just talking and kissing or the moment you first had sex/said i love you to each other. or something like meeting your parents or meeting you for the first time.
night (how are nights spent with her?)
cuddles, movies and late night talks. but before she'd help you make dinner if you lived together (she would just watch, "disturb" you by getting all touchy when you're cooking, and bossing you around).
open (when would she start revealing things about herself?)
she would not bring the meds thing up until she fully trusted you. if talking about her bad relationship with her parents, i don't think she tries to hide it since she mentioned how her dad showed affection in a poor way by getting the girls a private plane to get them to the nationals.
pet names (what pet names does she use?)
baby, angel, love, sweetheart, gorgeous, pretty girl/boy if you don't use gender neutral pronouns. she's the cutest.
quality time (how does she like to spend time with you)
anything. literally anything as long as you're with her. cooking together, reading together, shopping together!!!, just chatting and cuddling.
remember (does she remember things about you?)
lottie would remember everything you'd say to her. siblings/cousins names, first pet, first crush, favorite food, how old you were when you did something important or silly. she loves you and likes to show you how much she cares.
security (how protective is she? how would she like to be protected?)
very protective. if you were in the plane, she would've hugged you while crashing :(( if she was the antler queen, she'd constant watch you and make sure you were feeling great at all times. lottie doesn't say it out loud but she loves and needs the feeling of protection. she loves when you stand up for her, take care of her and hug her tight to protect her. (my poor girl she just have some mommy issues leave her alone >:()
try (how much effort would she puts into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
again, she loves and cares a lot. would plan the cutest dates and anniversaries and gift you with things she knows you'd love. in everyday tasks, she'd do anything to please you, including cleaning so you wouldn't have to do it after a long day at work.
understanding (how well does she know you? is she empathetic?)
this should be common sense at this point but lottie is SO empathetic. to you and to anyone else. she takes care of you and everyone, make sure everyone is safe. even during her time in switzerland (malcolm matthews im in your walls) she comforted that woman during a crisis. she's an angel.
value (how important is the relationship to her?)
you and your relationship with her means everything. she values and cherishes it so so so much.
wedding (how does she propose?)
if you were shy/reserved, lottie would know better than to propose to you in public. even if you weren't, i feel like she'd love to propose away from people's eyes. just the two of you. she had an entire speech prepared full of pretty words but was sobbing so hard that you had to help her through it. (truly believe she would like to get married surrounded by nature).
x-ray (is she able to read you?)
she knows you so well. she knows if you're happy, sad, uncomfortable, angry, upset. she can red you sooo easily and always knows what to say or what to do.
yearning (how well does she copes when separated from you)
she'd turn into a sad/annoyed mess. definitely has separation anxiety. adult lottie would handle it much better though, but would miss you endlessly.
zen (what makes her feel calm)
cuddles, hearing your voice talking about random things to distract her or help her with anxiety, calm songs, tea, romantic and cute moments, hearing about your day and telling you about hers.
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doctorcurdlejr · 8 months ago
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Niko!! what'd you think of I saw the tv glow. I finally saw it last night and noticed you posting about it so I wanted to know your thoughts :)
Levi!!! I was JUST wondering what you were thinking about the movie after I saw you posting about it as well... we are so media discussion pilled in this way, it's awesome. ANYWAYS I've had so many thoughts since I first saw it and I've been trying to turn them into something coherent for a little bit now.
Ummm okay I have written 1k+ words about this movie, the suburbs, and escapism via teen TV.... clearly I was dying for somebody to ask this I guess so thank you for indulging me <3
First and foremost, I absolutely loved it! I've seen it twice now and the first time I watched it I got to see Jane Schoenbrun talk about the film right after. I already really liked it from that first watch alone. I found it so deeply relatable to my experiences - both in terms of growing up gay and trans, but where I am now in my 20s trying to navigate adulthood. Hearing what Schoenbrun had to say really cemented my feelings and thoughts about the film.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer was a big influence on the movie (it's why Amber Benson makes a cameo as Johnny Link's mom). Even though I don't have the same emotional link to Buffy since I never watched it, I recognize it as the same type of warmth I experienced growing up with Riverdale. When Owen says he feels like his insides have been scooped out but that he's too afraid to look and have that wrongness everybody knows is there be confirmed, Maddy simply responds "Maybe you're like Isabel. Afraid of what's inside you." Tears forming but not falling, breathing shallowly, I grabbed the paper and pen the theater keeps at the seats for people to order food with and wrote that line down - the slip of paper is still somewhere in my car. Writing it now almost feels lame in its simplicity, but it felt like my insides were being flayed open.
During the director discussion, Schoenbrun talked a little bit about this idea of how truly fucking bizarre it is to grow up in the suburbs. Like, when we think about the pinnacle of normality in American culture, it's the image of middle-class cis-hetero-white suburbia. At the same time, despite this cultural dream of normality, everybody is hyper-aware that the suburbs are one of the least normal things ever. So, the ACTUAL cultural understanding of it is that it's where we go to, like, passively kill ourselves (*George Costanza voice* WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY YOU KNOW!). This idea isn't new, I mean there are so many films and shows about navigating that specific bizarre dissonance from Rebel Without a Cause to Heathers to Twin Peaks. Probably half the pre-teen to teen TV I watched obsessively growing up, stuff like Strange Days at Blake Holsey High, Making Fiends, Truth or Scare, and eventually Riverdale, were never shy about being weird and morbid and saying "yes, the suburbs are exactly as bizarre and lethal in the ways you can already feel in your bones at 13." I Saw the TV Glow does a really good job of keying not only into that mental dissonance but more specifically into how those of us who have felt so intrinsically weird and different and wrong fell back on these shows like they were capable of doing the emotional version of a rescue breath maneuver after being drowned.
In high school, if there were two things about me that any person who even vaguely knew me could list off it was that I watched Riverdale, and I was a lesbian - and I was mocked more for the Riverdale. At that age, I was, without a doubt, the most miserable I have ever felt in my life. I rarely left the house because my family lived in a development that made me want to scratch my skin off when I walked out our front door. Owen didn't leave the house for days, afraid Maddy could somehow force him out. I sobbed constantly and frequently to depressing indie rock on the floor of my closet while hoping my family would just once read the (honest to god) KEEP OUT poster plastered on my door since I didn't have a lock on it. Owen didn't leave his room for days, afraid of what Maddy recognized in him. I didn't go on dates and kept my chest binder shoved to the bottom of my bookbag while wearing dresses that could've come from a how-to-be the perfect 50s housewife manual. Owen didn't leave his bed for days, afraid of Maddy touching his neck and Isabel's dress. I also watched Riverdale with the kind of zeal you see in a Pentecostal who has found God and started speaking in tongues to let you know it. I own a button that says, "Don't Make Me Go Dark Betty On You," I cherish it in a way that is only achieved by knowing exactly how corny and trite it is and then moving straight past that because well actually, and most people wouldn't get this, she's holding back something deeply dark and wild and- and disgusting. something painful yet intrinsically her. but i get it, obviously. or maybe not obviously! hopefully not obviously, but- basically, I'm just saying I get it: the experience of reflection and recognition through the other and all that.
Whatever, the point is that this movie is one big glaring trans allegory about how it sucks dog shit to live in the suburbs, and even at our most repressed we find these little snow globes of actualization in the glow of a tv screen that isn't afraid to show you the world you see. I've seen some people say that, like, in this context accepting or coming into your transness is this monumental death of self, which I get, but I feel there lacks a nuance in that because either way Owen is dying. Unlike Maddy who buries herself alive only to come out renewed, Owen doesn't kill himself upon facing the reality that the world is constructed to keep him miserable and the only way out is to take back what it is that the world wants to keep scooped out of him. Instead he just passively lets it drag him to a much more permanent death. This lack of suicide sucks in the kind of way that forces you to sit in your car on the midnight drive home and think to yourself am I letting myself suffocate because at some point knowing the misery became less scary than admitting I've been capable of doing something about it the whole time?
Clearly, I’ve been enchanted by the film’s narrative and meta-textual language. If you're familiar with it, you can see how Schoenbrun built this movie like a long-form dream episode of a canceled teen show filmed in Vancouver. Lynchian? Yeah, sure. Riverdalesque? THIS we cannot possibly deny. Schoenbrun said they included Amber Benson as an act of healing the inner rage experienced at Tara’s death in Buffy. This is a Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa ending Riverdale with a bisexual polycule after his gay Archie play got ceased-and-desisted type move. There’s probably more I could say about the soundtrack and the visuals, but I’ve hit over 1k words on this, so I’ll leave it at I enjoyed this movie a lot. :)
Maddy is an out lesbian who left town to escape the misery and found it strapped to her ankles. She slinks out, an animal pressed against the gymnasium floor, and says "I'm not telling you anything you don't already know." Owen looks into the camera and narrates. He cuts himself open with a box cutter, fully acknowledges what's there, and the movie ends with his suffocating apology parade for the unremarkable inconvenience of his excruciating suffering. You can be gay and trans, you can know it and you can stop repressing it, but you're not going to stop suffocating until you can find a way to destroy the part of you that truly deeply does want to die, reaching for the comforting euthanasia of normalcy. Stop visiting the dream of the life you want and make it into your reality with the same kind of unrepentant conviction seen in some underfunded but wildly ambitious teen television series. In other words: you must try to survive the ego death of being weird. A weirdo, who doesn't fit in and doesn't want to fit in!
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