#then we’ll be doing some edits and add in a few scenes here and there

[awildwriter]

my ass stayed up waaaayyyyy too late considering my furry children are going to wake me up in two hours for breakfast but I did so many writings

who needs sleep when there’s gay witches

[morgana-larkin]

And here is Mine part 7 peeps! It’s got it all, fluff, smut and a strong want to be Mel’s wife. Not edited in the slightest and I hope you like it!

On another note: I might add Agatha Harkness to the list as I LOVED the trailer for Agatha All Along.

Mine - Part 7

Warnings: Smut, reader and Amelia get sick, shit ton of fluff

Words: 4.5k

You and Melissa both look at Amelia as she refuses to eat her breakfast.

“Mamma.” Amelia whines out and Melissa looks at her.

“Yes, my little Tesoro?”

“I don’t feel well.” Amelia says and Melissa feels her forehead.

“You do seem a bit hot.” Melissa says and you go and get the thermometer and Melissa takes her temperature. “101.3, that’s a fever alright.”

“What are we gonna do? We can’t skip out on today? Neither one of us can.” You tell Melissa and she sighs then looks at Amelia.

You both walk into Abbott after dropping the twins off at daycare. Melissa is carrying Amelia in her arms while you have her bag with some things for her to play with, other things you might need for her and some medicine.

“Why do you have Amelia with you?” Ava asks as she sees you 3.

“Well she’s got a fever and you told us we can’t skip today’s meeting that you have planned.” You tell her and she just shrugs.

“Alright, as long as it’s just a fever.” Is all Ava says and walks away.

“Hello girls.” Barb says behind you both and you turn around. “And Amelia…?” She adds.

“Fever.” Melissa says and Barb nods in understanding.

“I’m tiwed.” Amelia says and Melissa looks at her and rubs her back.

“You can go to sleep, my little Tesoro.” Melissa says and Amelia places her head on Melissa’s chest and falls asleep.

The meeting Ava held was indeed important as it went through some new rules that the district implemented and a few other things. You got a bunch of looks from other teachers but that was expected as Melissa is carrying a toddler. Jacob kept making faces at Amelia when she woke up and she giggled a few times.

When you were able to leave after the meeting ended then you both went to Melissa’s classroom and you put Amelia on the carpet. You got her food out as it was near her feeding time and you gave it to her. Amelia eagerly took it and began to eat happily. You feel her forehead and she’s still hot.

You sit next to Amelia as she eats and she cuddles into you and you put an arm around her shoulders. Melissa sees the scene and she takes a few pictures of you two with a smile. Barb walks in as Melissa was taking the pictures.

“Hello girls.” She says and you both look at her.

“Hey Barb.” Melissa says as she goes over the year plan for second graders. Barb walks over to Amelia and bends down to her level.

“Hi Amelia, great to see you again.” She tells her with a smile.

“Hi auntie bawba.” Amelia says and takes another bite of her food.

“Not feeling good?” She asks her and Amelia shakes her head. “Oh that’s not good, your mommies will take good care of you though.” She tells her and gets up. “I just came by to see if you guys need help with anything.” She tells you both.

“I think we’re ok for now, but we’ll let you know if that changes.” You say and she nods at you then leaves.

“You should probably get a few things done in your classroom.” Melissa tells you and you look at her.

“I know, when she’s done eating then I will.” You say and walks up to you both and sit down on the other side of Amelia and wraps an arm around you.

“I love you both.” She says and kisses both of your foreheads.

“You’re acting like one of us is dying, it’s just a fever.” You joke with her and she chuckles.

“I can’t just randomly say I love you both?” She asks you and you smile at her.

“Of course you can.” You say and you give her a kiss. “And we love you too. Right Amelia?” You ask her and she looks at you confused. “Do you love mamma?” You clarify and she nods her head as she takes her last bite. “You ate it all while being sick? You’re definitely Melissa’s daughter.” You say and Melissa bursts out laughing.

“Well like you said when you were pregnant with her, you haven’t had sex with anyone else.” She tells you and you laugh.

“And it’s true.” You look down to see Amelia asleep on your lap and you stroke her head. “I mean why would I want to sleep with someone else?” You ask slyly and she quirks an eyebrow at you before she leans in and kisses you.

“I bet no one else can get you to make the same noises I can get you to make.” Melissa tells you and you hum.

“I think you’re right, the noises are for your ears only.” You tell her and you both kiss again.

You both pull apart when there’s a knock on the door. You both look and see Janine there.

“Hey, I just wanted to come and see Amelia. Is she feeling better?” Janine asks you both.

“Afraid not, still has a fever but thankfully is asleep right now.” Melissa answers and Janine nods.

You end up going back to your classroom after handing a sleeping Amelia over to Melissa and you get started on getting your classroom ready.

About an hour later you hear little feet running and a pair of heels right after it. You peek your head out of the classroom and you see Amelia running to you and Melissa running after her. You kneel down and have your arms open and Amelia runs into your arms. You pick her up and Melissa catches up.

“She woke up and asked for you. Apparently when she’s sick then I’m not the favourite.” Melissa tells you and you giggle.

“Mommy.” Amelia says and nuzzles her head on your chest and sucks her thumb.

“It’s your heartbeat.” Melissa says. “Her brain must remember it when she was in your tummy and it makes her feel safe. Which makes sense as she heard it for the first almost 9 months of her life.” Melissa tells you and you rub Amelia’s back.

“They do say a mother that gave birth will always have a special bond with their child.” You say and Melissa smiles and then takes a photo of the two of you.

“That’s gonna be my new Home Screen photo.” Melissa says and changes it on her phone.

“What’s your Lock Screen photo?” You ask her and she shows you. It was the photo that Barb took when the twins were just born, you both held one of the twins and Amelia sitting beside you on the hospital bed.

“You know that there’s been recent family photos of the 5 of us right?” You tell her and she shrugs.

“This one’s my favourite, it’s the day I got the best family in the world.” She says and you smile at her.

“I don’t know how much more love I can have for you before my heart explodes.” You tell her and she kisses you.

“I feel the same as you, I didn’t know it was possible to love someone as much as I love you.” Melissa tells you and you both kiss each other again.

“Yucky!” Amelia suddenly says and you both pull apart and look at her.

“Oh your mommies kissing is yucky?” Melissa asks Amelia with a quirked eyebrow and Amelia nods. “Well what if I kissed you? Is that yucky?” She asks and Amelia nods again. Melissa goes and kisses Amelia all over the face and she starts giggling.

At lunchtime, the 3 of you head to the break room and sit on the couch. Melissa warms up the leftovers for all of you as Amelia is on your lap with her head on your chest. Melissa comes back and you get Amelia to get off of you and to sit on the couch so she can eat her food. Melissa sits beside you while you all eat and you put your head on her shoulder when you finish.

“Y/n? Y/n!” Melissa yells and your eyes snap open.

“What?” You ask her. “I had my eyes closed but I was awake.” You say as she looks at you.

“More like you were asleep as you also have a fever.” She says and you realise that Amelia is no longer beside you and Melissa moved her body so your head is now on her chest. You look around and see Amelia is being held by Barb and your body relaxes.

“Wait, what do you mean I have a fever?” You ask as soon as the words she said are processed in your brain.

“I mean you’re sick as well, and since the meeting is over, I think we should all go home.” She says softly as she strokes your head. “How does that sound? We can go home and you and Amelia can sleep on the couch and I’ll take care of you both.” She says and you hum.

“That does sound nice.” You tell her and she goes to get everything ready to bring you all home. “Are we going to get the twins first?” You ask her when you’re all in the car.

“No, I'll go get them when we normally get them. For now I’ll bring us home, give you both medicine for your fevers and then you and Amelia both have to rest.” She tells you and you nod and then you both turn to look at Amelia who’s asleep again.

“Her body must be tired from fighting off the fever all day.” You say.

“Yours will be too.” Melissa tells you.

You both get home and Melissa gets both of you to immediately go to the couch and get comfortable while she gets the medicine for you. She comes back in a couple minutes later with adult medicine for you and toddler medicine for Amelia. You both take it, Amelia rejects it at first, and then you both get comfortable on the couch.

“Mel?” You call out and she comes over and stands by your side.

“What’s up Amore Mia?” She asks and you look at her with puppy dog eyes.

“Can we cuddle?” You ask her and Amelia perks up at this.

“I want cuddles too.” Amelia says and Melissa giggles.

“We’d have to go upstairs and get in our bed if we want to do a group cuddle.” Melissa tells you both and then you both get up off the couch and go towards the stairs. Melissa picks Amelia up when you reach the stairs and she helps you up as well. When you reach the top, you all go to your bedroom and Melissa places Amelia down on the bed and you join her. “Little Tesoro, who do you want to cuddle with? Me or mommy?” Melissa asks her and Amelia thinks about it.

“Umm…mommy.” She says and you wrap an arm around her and she nuzzles her head in your chest. Melissa gets in the bed and wraps an arm around you and you let out a content sigh. You then fall asleep with Melissa cuddling you and you cuddling Amelia.

You wake up in the bed alone and figure they must be downstairs. You get up and slowly walk to the stairs. You grab onto the railing tightly and start the walk down. When you get downstairs, you see there’s no one here and you check the time. Oh, Melissa is probably picking the twins up. You go and sit on the couch and put something on. When Melissa returns with all 3 kids, you’re about to put Shrek on.

“Hey Amore, you’re up.” Melissa tells you when she sees you and Amelia runs up to you.

“Do you need help?” You ask her and she shakes her head.

“Nope, I got it. I’m about to put them in their playpen and then get some food ready for Amelia. Are you hungry? I can make a snack for everyone.” She says as she reaches the playpen with the stroller and unclips the twins.

“I’m good for now. Wanna watch Shrek with me? And Amelia, I think you’ll like this movie.” You say and she gives you a kiss after putting the twins in the playpen.

“I’d love to watch it with you. I’ll be right back.” She says and then goes into the kitchen to get food for Amelia and a couple of snacks for you both. “I was told they just fed the twins before I picked them up so they should be good for another few hours. Here you go Amelia.” Melissa says as she puts a plate down on the floor for Amelia to eat while she watches the movie. She then sets a plate down full of yours and hers favourite fruits and veggies. She then sits at the corner of the couch and you cuddle on her and then press play.

The rest of the evening goes by quickly as you switched to Disney movies and Melissa gets up now and again to either feed the twins, Amelia or you. At nighttime, you’re already in bed when she’s getting ready.

“I don’t know about you Amore but I’m exhausted. Who knew taking care of 4 people, 2 of them being sick, would be tiring.” She says sarcastically and chuckles a bit as she slides into bed next to you.

“I’m not tired.” You begin and then you climb on top of her. “But I know something that will make me tired.” You say slyly and she quirks an eyebrow at you.

“Amore, I don’t have the energy. We have a vibrator in the box, you should use that instead.” She tells you and then pushes you off of her.

“Woah!” You say as you fall off of her and on to your side of the bed. “Ass.” You quietly hiss out.

“I heard that.” She says unimpressed.

“Well…good.” You say and she turns to look at you. “If you want me to use the vibrator then I will but I’ll be doing it right here where you can see and hear.” You tell her proudly and she smiles.

“Go for it baby. I’d love to hear and see you satisfy yourself.” She says and you groan, that wasn’t the plan. Maybe if you start then she’ll want to continue it, you think, as you smirk and get the vibrator. You get back on the bed and you press the button to start it. It starts vibrating and you put it directly on your clit and you moan out.

“Oh god, oh that feels good.” You moan and you glance over and see Melissa watching you. You lay down next to her and you put one hand on your boob and start playing with your nipple. You gasp out and you think of an idea that might get her going. “Hmm, oh this feels better than when you do it Mel.” You tell her and she snorts.

“We both know that’s not true, baby.” She says and you look at her.

“Why don’t you prove it then?” You tell her and she shakes her head.

“Are you really that horny that you need me to make you come?” She asks and at this point you just want to be fucked by her no matter what, so you nod.

“Yes, I need you Mel.” You whine out and she smiles at you. She wraps her arm around your waist and pulls you to her. She snakes a hand down your pants while she kisses you. She starts circling your clit with her finger and you start bucking your hips and moan out. You grab a hold of anywhere on her as your orgasm is starting to build. “Omg Mel!” You cry out as you pull away from her kisses and she starts kissing your neck.

“It’s ok baby, I got you. Let go when you need too.” She tells you and a few seconds later you come with a muffled cry, as she kisses you as she knew you were about to come. Melissa pulls out of you and kisses your forehead and all over your face as you come down from your high. You both then hear a soft knock at the door and Melissa gets up to answer it and sees Amelia there. “Something wrong Tesoro?” She asks her.

“Nighmawe.” Is all she says and Melissa frowns and picks Amelia up.

“A nightmare, oh well that’s no fun. Wanna tell us what happened in your nightmare?” Melissa asks her as she brings her over to the bed.

“Well.” Amelia starts as she’s placed on the bed in between you and Melissa. “Thewe was actually a monstew undew my bed and it got you both and took you away.” She tells you both and you wrap an arm around her and rub her arm.

“Aw, sorry you had to go through that honey. But I promise that me and mamma are right here. We have no plans of leaving and it would take a lot more than a monster under the bed to take us away from you and the twins.” You tell her and she sniffles a bit.

“Tesoro, do you want to sleep with us tonight?” Melissa offers and Amelia nods as she wipes her eyes with her little hands and you both hate to see her upset. You get Amelia under the covers and you both snuggle her as you all fall asleep.

“ACHOO!” You sneeze and it wakes Amelia and Melissa up. Melissa looks at the time and sees that it’s 5am.

“You woke us up an hour before our alarm.” Melissa whines and you glare at her.

“Well I’ll try and sneeze quieter next time.” You say sarcastically and congested. Melissa quirks an eyebrow and looks at you.

“You alright there Amore?” Melissa asks you as Amelia falls back asleep.

“I feel worse than yesterday.” You say and she looks at you before getting up and quietly going to the other side of the bed without waking Amelia up. She feels your forehead and you still feel hot and you let out a cough.

“I think your fever has evolved into a cold Amore Mia.” She says softly and you groan. “How about today, I’ll drop the kids off at daycare and then I can stay home to take care of you?” She suggests and you shake your head.

“You have things to do to prepare for the kids.” You say.

“So do you and we can do it from home. I was going to work on the first couple of lesson plans anyway.” She says and you lean over to her and she puts an arm around you and cups your cheek. “Yours and our children’s health and happiness is the most important thing to me.” She tells you and you hum.

“Ok.” You tell her and she moves her hand from cupping your cheek to lightly scratching your scalp. “Hm, I love you.” You say and she smiles.

“I love you too.” She says and you fall asleep on her stomach and she chuckles at that.

When you wake up, it’s due to Melissa calling your name.

“Y/n?” She says and you open up your eyes. “Y/n, I brought some breakfast as well as some medicine. Then after you’re done I thought we could have a nice bath together.” She suggests and you look at her with a smile.

“I like what I’m hearing.” You say and she gives you your medicine and then hands the food over. “How long was I asleep for?” Noticing now that Amelia wasn’t there.

“About 3 hours. The kids are at daycare.” She says and you nod your head.

You eat and then she starts to draw a bath after you digested for a few minutes. She starts undressing as you’re sitting on top of the toilet in a robe. She takes her shirt and bra off and then you stand up and wrap your arms around her waist and nuzzle your head on her chest.

“I do have to finish getting undressed to have a bath Amore.” She says with a chuckle.

“You’re comfy.” You say with a hum and she strokes the side of your head with a smile.

“You can lay on my stomach in the tub all you want.” She tells you and you reluctantly let her get undressed. She steps in the tub and sits down on the side, opposite of the faucet, and you take your robe off and join her in the tub. You sit down with your back on her chest and she wraps her arms around you and lays her head on your shoulder. As much as she loves her family and children, she loves these moments of just you and her just as much.

“I love you so much, Amore. Do you know that?” She says and you lean into her.

“I mean you tell me everyday so I think so.” You joke and she snorts. “Seriously though, I do know. Even if you don’t say it, I can see it in your eyes.” You tell her and she smiles. “And I love you too.”

She realises that you don’t sound as congested and the steam of the water must be helping your nose right now.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you.” She suddenly says after a few moments of silence and you turn around to face her.

“Is something going through your mind?” You ask her with curiosity.

“Just that I love you and I don’t want to lose you.” She tells you honestly and you wrap your arms around her neck and look at her with a smile.

“Well I love you and I don’t want to lose you either.” You tell her and she smiles at you as she tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear.

You lean in and you kiss each other full of love for the other. The kisses quickly turn into hungry ones and you place your hands in her hair and you get into a more seated position. Melissa pulls back at that moment to look at you.

“Are you sure you’re ok to do this? It’s ok if you’re not.” She says and you cup her cheek.

“If I wasn’t ok then I would have already told you.” You tell her with a smile.

“Ok.” She says with a nod and then you go back to kissing each other. You move your hands to cup both her breasts and she moans into the kiss. She wraps her arms around your waist and pulls your body closer to hers. You attach your mouth to her neck and you start sucking. She gasps out at the sensation and she moves her hands up and down your back. You then move down and put your mouth around a nipple. She gasps out again. “Dio mio bambina.” She says and you smirk at that.

There’s only been a handful of times that Melissa has gone full Italian. The last time you remember was when you got cravings when you were pregnant with the twins and you told her you don’t want Italian food. Another time was when you found out you were pregnant with Amelia. She does it when she’s overcome with emotions that she prefers speaking Italian. So the fact that she’s gone full Italian right now, you were impressed. The conversation you had right before must have helped.

While sucking on her nipple, you move your right hand down and run a finger through her folds. She quickly moves her hands from your back to your hair. You insert a finger in her entrance and she pulls your hair a bit and moans out. “Rapido.” She breathes out and you start pumping faster and insert another finger. “Dio mio, ti amo tanto bambina.” She gasps out and brings you closer to kiss you. You press your thumb to her clit and she comes a few seconds later with a moan. You pull back and pull out of her gently and she opens her eyes.

“You alright?” You ask her and she smiles as she nods her head. “You went full Italian.” You tell her and she blushes. “What does tanto mean? You said, ti amo tanto bambina.” You ask her.

“It means I love you so much baby. I guess I was very overcome with love.” She tells you and you smile. Before you get any chance to respond, she presses a finger to your clit and starts rubbing it. You gasp out as you place your hands on her breasts and she smirks at you. “You really love my tits, don’t you baby?” She asks you and then she inserts a finger in your entrance.

“I do, I really do love them.” You quickly say as you squeeze them a bit. She presses her thumb to your clit and it doesn’t take long until you come.

You both wait a minute to calm down from your highs before you get out of the tub. She helps to dry you off and then you slip some comfy pjs on.

“Why don’t we go downstairs and I can make us some food and you can relax on the couch?” She suggests and you nod.

“Sounds like a plan.” You tell her.

For the rest of the day, she helps to take care of you while also doing her lesson plan and helping you with yours. You both end up finishing when it’s time to get your kids. You both go to get your kids from daycare and bring them home. Melissa puts the twins in their playpen while you get Amelia situated on the floor with some of her favourite toys.

“Mommy, awe you feewing bettew?” Amelia asks you and you smile at her.

“I am honey, mamma took good care of me today.” You tell her and she nods.

At the end of the day, Melissa comes into your room after putting the kids to bed. “Hey Amore, ready for bed?” She asks and you nod.

“I feel bad that you did a lot of work in the past 2 days. Yesterday you took care of me and Amelia and then today you took care of me and you had to take more care of the twins because it was better for you to be near them instead of me.” You tell her and she walks over to you and grabs your hands.

“Amore, I will always take care of all of you and will happily do it as well. Yes it can be tiring but it’s worth it to me, ok?” She tells you and you nod.

“Ok.” You say and kiss her. You both finish getting ready for bed and fall asleep.

Taglist: @esposadejoyhuerta

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Let me know if you want to be added!

[worldcatlas]

Star Trek: The Motion Picture (part 2)

We’re back to the big screen to finish up Star Trek: The Motion Picture, and discover even more exciting shades of beige.

In part one, I skipped over a brief appearance by the Klingons because you can barely see them, but with a bit of photo editing, we can take a closer look.

Why are their bridges so dark? Do targs have sensitive eyes?

Interestingly, they wear a style of uniform we would later see in TNG and beyond – all grey leather and metal studs – rather than the “sparkly sweater vest” uniforms Klingons usually wore in the original series. Although it’s a significant and unexplained departure from their small-screen appearance, I have to say, it’s a lot easier to take these Klingons seriously.

Remember these guys? Star Trek wants you to forget.

I also skipped over a brief appearance by a lil’ guy in a space suit, but we’ll get back to this costume later.

You just float there for now.

Picking up where we left off, Kirk steps off a shuttle sporting a handsome new uniform in slimming charcoal grey and white. It maintains the gold rank braids on the cuffs from the original series uniforms, but adds a futuristic belt, military-style shoulder marks, and a solid metal Starfleet badge. A stiff, quilted collar adds a touch of “space suit,” as well. All in all, a very sleek space-age outfit that feels like a solid upgrade to the brightly-coloured sweaters of TOS.

I can’t wait to see how everyone else looks in this cool new uniform! 

We also get a momentary, blurry glimpse of some excellent-looking Vulcan robes in black and gold, but once again, this beautiful costume barely gets a moment of screentime before being whisked away.

He had to hurry off to fix his eyebrows, I get it.

So… as it turns out, only admirals get the cool new penguin uniform, and everyone else is stuck with space scrubs. They don’t even get a metal badge (not even hard-working Scotty!), just an embroidered patch with a silver Starfleet delta against a coloured circle indicating the wearer’s department.

At least he gets the cool belt.

Up on the bridge of the Enterprise, It’s a full-on Situation Beige. Crewmen buzz around the bridge in every imaginable shade of white, off-white, tan, taupe, and ecru, blending in nicely with the bulkheads.

Fashion crimes notwithstanding, I think there’s also an OSHA violation or two going on here…

Not even Uhura is immune to unflattering shades of khaki, although she does give us a quick glimpse at the Apple Watch-like wrist communicator worn throughout the film. It’s a great accessory that would unfortunately be rendered obsolete by the comm badge as the franchise moved on.

This woman deserves fashion, dammit!

Chekov, Sulu, and other crewmen model a few interesting variations on the theme, including a tight-fitting polo, a standard crew neck, and an awkwardly-tailored sport coat that can’t possibly be regulation.

You know, for uniforms, they’re not very… uniform.

While others, like Commander Decker, enjoy tight-fitting jumpsuits in the beige-est possible shade of blue. Somehow, I just don’t get a sense of authority from a man who looks like he’s been vacuum-sealed inside his footie pajamas.

Oh boy, you can see Commander Decker’s whole entire Commander Decker.

Next, we are treated to a great crowd shot that really shows off the scope of the costume department’s efforts, with dozens of varied uniforms packed into the scene. It makes me feel a little bad for going after the colour palette so hard, considering the difficulty of coordinating so many pieces.

Then again, it really is giving “thermal underwear in space.”

There are a few noteworthy variations in the crowd, including the guy with an uncovered electrical socket in the front row, but my favourite is probably this Native American officer with cool beaded accessories.

Chakotay could learn a thing or two.

The next character to make their big screen debut is the ship’s doctor, Leisure Suit Larry Dr. McCoy, in a fly as hell, disco-ready outfit, complete with gold chain, oversized belt buckle, and a frankly criminal amount of chest hair. And let’s not even talk about the beard. Thankfully, the good doctor soon cleans up and changes into uniform.

Still too much chest hair.

Next, we pay a visit to engineering to see Scotty, who has gotten a significant costume upgrade. Along with his fellow warp core enthusiasts, Mr. Scott sports a heavy-duty, protective-looking white suit with a strange socket (or antennae?) on the chest, surrounded by concentric circles of padded fabric that really make you wanna plug something in there. Oddly, the costumes also feature black rubber collars that presumably attach to their matching helmets, but do not appear at all sealed to the body of the suit.

They’re air-tight…ish.

Fortunately, the suits also include a handy, built-in to-do list.

Memory aids can be helpful for a… mature crew.

Last but not least, the old gang is finally back together as Spock joins the crew, feeling absolutely no emotion about how slick he looks in these long-sleeved Vulcan robes. I love the matching grey tones between the high-collared shirt underneath and the embroidered Vulcan script on the outer garment (though I’m sure this was a purely logical choice).

It says “zip up here.”

Sadly, Spock is quick to follow protocol and changes into a Starfleet uniform as well. However, he does keep the collared undershirt, creating an ensemble that – in a nice nod to TOS – closely resembles his old uniform.

Spock appreciates consistency.

Uhura has also gotten a costume change, and although they still won’t let her out of Beige Hell, she has at least gotten a smart two-piece pant suit that looks a little more comfortable. In addition to being more flattering, this uniform also includes the gold rank braids at the wrists.

Maybe the replicators in the 2270s only have one colour of ink.

Some plot happens, and the ship’s navigator, Ilia, gets hijacked by an alien entity. After briefly experimenting with no costume, she manifests this wild sci-fi bath robe with a huge Dracula collar. The asymmetrical hemline is super cute, but the belt at the waist could be a bit higher and more fitted. I do like how the pink lining inside the collar complements the robo-transmitter implanted in her collarbone.

The bad news: an alien has taken over your body. The good news: they put on a cute fit~

The back of the collar is a nice touch as well, tapering into a heart shape that flatters the actress’ perfectly-shaped head.

So smooth.

On the other hand, I cannot agree with V’ger’s choice of psychically-manifested footwear for this outfit. Clear plastic high heels might look futuristic, but they’re completely impractical for walking through a ship with perforated deck plating, running through sandy-floored caves, or standing near a warp core without melting.

At the other end of practicality, we are introduced to some members of the ship’s security team, who are inexplicably dressed like old-timey football players. They sport shiny helmets, phaser holsters, and crotch-protecting armour in a lovely chocolate brown. While it does break up the beige, it feels a bit silly to see combat guys ready to rumble on a Starfleet vessel.

I think they saw what the Klingons were wearing and got jealous.

Deciding to accessorize, V’ger tries on a headband belonging to her host. It’s a lovely beaded and sequined piece, with a gold charm dangling at one side, and very nearly reminds the navigator who she used to be.

Does this accessory clash with my parasitic control of another sentient being?

Things are getting intense story-wise, and Spock suits up in a shiny red “thruster suit” to take care of business – that is, an EV suit painted safety orange and strapped onto a rocket that looks like it was built with spare kitchen utensils. The whole ensemble is incredibly bulky, but believably looks like a rocket-belt-type contraption that might’ve existed in the 1970s.

Do what you have to do, Spock, but I’ll need my colander back before dinner.

We’re treated to a close-up on the suit’s gloves as Spock pilots the contraption, revealing plenty of details, including more structural quilting. I like the raised details along each finger on the gloves, implying some kind of built-in system, perhaps heating or robotic assistance. The frame of the thruster suit (painted beige) contains a control panel, with buttons on every surface. This segment detaches from the suit itself, so there are also buttons built into the left sleeve.

One for lemonade, one for ice, and one for diet Romulan ale.

We also get a good look at the back of the suit without the rocket attachment when Spock mind melds with V’ger, revealing more quilted details, including some hilarious concentric squares on the butt. From this angle, the suit is mostly the work of the prop department, who have done an excellent job making the hardware look both hi-tech and capable of playing Betamax tapes.

I think my Grandma had one of those on top the TV.

Kirk comes thrusting to the rescue in his own suit, and soon Spock is whisked away to Sick Bay for another costume change. I think this is meant to be a futuristic hospital gown, but it really looks like they’ve just wrapped the sheets around his legs and pinned them in place with binder clips.

In case the doctors need quick access to his thighs.

On the other hand, the sleeveless top is a whole look, and I love the hood with contrasting orange lining.

Not gonna lie, I’d wear it.

As a bonus, Doctors McCoy and Chapel have evolved into their final form: an all-white medical uniform with an oddly rounded collar, shoulder marks, and – notably – a rod of Asclepius embroidered on the left breast, in lieu of a Starfleet delta.

Missing a couple buttons there, Doc?

In the climactic finale, our brave crew suits up for one last away mission in suede jackets, taking advantage of the material’s natural beige hue. Unusual for Trek, they appear to have several large, prominent pockets – but any unease is quickly dispelled by the reassuring presence of decorative quilting along the arms. Speaking of which, the left arm of each jacket bears a reflective stripe that, curiously, does not seem to indicate rank or department, as Spock alone has a red armband.

Fascinating.

With little to differentiate their outfits, Decker decides to accessorize with dramatic lighting and sparkles. Lots of sparkles. Met-Gala-rolled-in-a-Michaels level of sparkles, a.k.a. the correct amount for any outfit. And with that, the Earth is saved.

What was the point of the film again?

[mcyt-trick-or-treat]

How to Trick-or-Treat in this Exchange

Sign-ups are just about here! If this is your first time signing up for an Ao3-based exchange, or you’d just like a little more information on how this exchange works behind the scenes, read on. I’ll take the opportunity to explain how sign-ups work and how we’ll be matching and sending out assignments for this year’s Trick-or-Treat.

1. Log into Ao3, access the collection, and click “sign-up.”

From here, we’re going to fill out the form to request the gifts we’d like to receive in our gift basket! Remember, we can only request the tags that were submitted during the nominations period.

I know I’m really excited to hopefully receive Empires SMP gifts this year, so I’ll start there! I select “Empires Season One” in the fandom field, and then I pick out my favorite relationships tags from the drop-down menu (I can search by name if there’s too many to scroll through).

I’m also going to have to select the medium I want to receive. For Empires, I’m happy to get both fic and art, so I’ll check both of those boxes.

Now, I just have to fill in the box to let my gifter(s) know what I do and don’t want in my gift. I’ll make two lists: my DNWs (Do-Not-Wants) and my likes. I’m going to include a few prompts for each relationship tag as well, to give them some ideas!

This is Trick-or-Treat, of course, and I’m a bit of an angst enjoyer, so I’m going to make a note of that in my sign-up. I love bittersweet and open endings, and I’m always happy to receive some whumpy hurt-comfort and sickfic. I’ll let my gifter know that I’d love to receive gifts that fall on the “trick” side or trick-or-treat — but I’d still be happy to receive some happier treats, too!

Remember, your gifters might match to you on just one tag, and they might even all pick to make you something based on the same prompt. So be sure that no matter what you request, you’d be okay receiving up to three gifts based on that thing!

After that, I just have to fill in the rest of my fandoms. Trick-or-Treat requires you to request at least three unique fandoms, but you can put it up to ten of them!

Once I’m happy with my requested fandoms and tags, I’ll move on to my offers.

2. Scroll down to the “Offers” box!

Now it’s time to let the mods know what I’m willing to create for someone else! Just like before, I’m going to type in a fandom in the correct field, select the tags I want to use from the drop-down menu, and check off the correct medium box(es).

For Fantasy SMP, I really only want to make art, because I love drawing fantasy/rpg costumes! So I’m only going to check the art box here. I’m actually also going to check the “Any” box as well instead of selecting individual relationships. That means I’m happy to match on Any of the nominated relationships for Fantasy SMP in the tagset.

And just like requests, I need to offer at least three unique fandoms for my sign-up to be valid. It’s okay if I double up fandoms, though, as long as I request at least three different ones. That’s good for me, because I have to split up my Empires offers!

I feel confident writing about a bunch of characters, but I’d only want to draw some of the other ones and not write about them. So I’m going to offer Empires Season One twice — once with the tags I want to write about, and another time for the tags I want to draw for.

There’s no boxes for me to write anything in, because I don’t have to give prompts for what I’m going to make. I get the prompts instead! That’s how this works.

So I’m all done now, and I can go ahead and click submit to send my sign-up form through to the mods. I can come back and edit it at any point before sign-ups close if I want to change what I’ve requested or offered, or if I want to add more prompts or details. Maybe I’ll even write a Dear-Gifter letter and put the link in my sign-up!

But I’m pretty much done now. So I can kick back, put my feet up, and relax… Until I remember that I’m actually also a mod in this exchange, and I have to go match everyone’s sign-ups now 😱

3. Receive Your Assignments

The mods will work behind the scenes to figure out a list of who everyone is able to create for. We’ll use those lists to figure out our best solution to the incredibly complicated question of “Who are you going to make your gifts for?”

Each participant will be given between one and three other participants that you will then create gifts for. You’ll receive one email from Ao3 telling you your initial giftee, and then you’ll receive a second one from the mod team letting you know if you have any other giftees, and how many gifts you need to make for each person. We’ll include all of the fandoms, tags, and details that your giftees requested, and your required gifts will always add up to exactly 3.

After that, it’s time to put on your creative hat and get writing and/or drawing! When each gift is all done, you’ll post it to Ao3 like usual.

4. I finished making my gift(s)! How do I post them?

Sign into Ao3 again and start posting like you usually would. You’ll need your title, tags, summary, etc. When you scroll down, check the box to gift this work and type in your giftee’s name. Or, if this is your initial giftee’s gift, you should check the box that says “fulfill gift for [giftee’s username]” and it’ll automatically gift it to them and mark your assignment as completed!

Do that two more times, and you’re all done! You did it! You are getting a good job in exchange, something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve.

5. BONUS: I Want To Make More? / I Didn’t Sign Up, But I Still Want To Make?

If someone needs to drop out of the exchange — and hey, no judgment, life happens. Just let a mod know you need to default (drop out and give up your assignment) as soon as possible — their assignment will still need to be made by someone. That’s where pinch hitters come in! Pinch hits will be shared in the discord with the fandoms and tags requested, and pinch hitters will have the opportunity to claim the hit and create a piece (or three) for it. It’ll be up to you how many gifts you want to take on for the pinch hit!

Pinch hitters are absolutely crucial to any exchange, and especially this one! We would be delighted to have you join us specifically for this role if it’s something you’re interested in.

6. Enjoy your gifts! Sit on the living room floor to dump out your candy basket and sort it into piles with childlike glee!

The collection will be on anon for one week. Creators will be revealed on November 7th! And then the exchange will truly come to an end.

Happy Trick-or-Treating!

[podfeels]

Podfeels Adapt8ion Notes: Episode 2

hello! dare again, and i know that last time i said we'd be releasing these gradually in "the coming days", but, well, life happens. specifically, life happened to where i was unable to write these notes at all. as such, i passed the duty on to another dedicated member of the team. im gonna let them take over from here, and god Damn she was so much more thorough than i wouldve been, but whenever theres a place where my input is needed, ill pipe in with purple text like this! now to get to the real shit:

hey it's luna stagelights here for some adaptational notes for podfeels. i'm only really here to talk about script differences, i can't exactly speak for art and sound design because i wasn't involved in that part of the process. ill pitch in with sound design when necessary, but art was mostly covered in the general S1 post we had the first time.

anyway letsa go

so episode 2 is interesting from an adaptational standpoint because it was the first episode we had to do basically entirely on our own. for episode 1 we had sarah’s changes already, and the decisions she made from there served as as a sort of guideline for what we’re doing from now on, although as time went on we found our own sort of groove for this sort of thing, and we’re not super tied down to the way sarah did it as much i think.

on the topic of the actual changes though: chapter 1 of godfeels 2 part 1 begins with a flashback to pages 5283-5288 of homestuck, with John and Jade watching Con Air, with John declaring that “this movie fucking sucks!”. the episode begins a bit before that, with some noise from the movie itself, specifically audio synced to the footage on screen in the original comic. this change isn't really that major in the long run though, mostly just adding detail to help sell the scene better.

left is the original, right is what got put in the episode. there are a few inconsistencies between what i show here and the scriptlog shown in the episode , but i re-edited the doc to match what you hear in the actual episode.

lot of narration cut and replaced with sound. this is going to be EXTREMELY commonplace as we go forward. 

ok so this line wasn’t actually changed but I do distinctly remember there being some discussion about this, as john says “w8ke up” like “waitk up” here, which i thought felt awkward, however we came to the agreement that john is the kind of dork ass nerd who would say typing quirks like this aloud. but this does actually bring up an issue we’ll see a lot later on, and that is “how the fuck do you vocalize typing quirks”, especially with the inordinate number of gags that rely on presence of a typing quirk. the answer we’ve come to seems to be “on a case by case basis”, but usually characters don’t talk as if their typing quirks are a factor unless theres a good reason.

more lines changed from “texted” to “called” to reflect the change done from texts to calls as it’s an audio format, in line with sarah’s adaptations in episode 1.

“delete that message” was replaced with “forget i said that”, because it’s a call and that wouldn’t make sense.

another minor adaptational hurdle was dealing with emoticons in text. it’s another case by case thing, sometimes it can be just a little sound, sometimes if theres an emoticon at the end of a line we can just remove it and factor it into the delivery of the line, but with lines like this we just simply added terezi doing a little laugh to convey a similar emotion to the emoticon.

the “whoops shit” was added along with a sound of rose snoring, evoking the effect of being too loud on the phone while a friend is asleep, to reflect that it’s a call

the >:x is represented by terezi making a little ‘zzzp’ sound.

this is another answer to the emoticon problem, sometimes you just add a line there instead. 

text does a fun thing with color here, but we couldn’t do anything about that. I think there was discussion about having the va’s for the character who’s colors are represented in the text saying the line, but there was no way to get that to sound even remotely good so we just left the line as is. sometimes when adapting shit things like this will just have to be cut.

oh now THIS is a fun bit.

dare mentioned the talkpogs in the adaptation notes for episode 1, i can’t exactly go too into that part myself because it’s not my wheelhouse, but there is an INCREDIBLY fun bit in the youtube version of this, where terezi does her trademark scribbles on her own talkpog, just for the bit. in the audio-only versions, this bit is missing, and the scribble sound effect as she scribbles on her talkpog are also absent, because they’re a part of a joke that’s simply not there. the bit is still *kind of* there in the audio only version because in both versions terezi clears her throat. its also the first place where the talkpog coloration rules are demonstrated! in our talkpogs, the inner circle is their name color, and the outer ring is their text color. so when she draws on the hey dweebkid this you face, her outer ring shifts to john's text color!

another minor change, just having it be a more natural end to the phone call by adding some words.

after the call we added a new bit of dialogue here, as a way to more naturally transition between chapters, as this episode covers 2 chapters of the original fic. as time goes on and chapters get longer though, covering multiple chapters in a single episode becomes less feasible, often leaning towards us having some later chapters being planned to be multiple episodes.

the rest of the episode is basically entirely made up of narration, and there were actually no adaptational changes made in the narration! 

but there is one last moment. the text originally ends with a section break and then a text of vriska saying “there you are”, and for this episode we simulated that paragraph break by leaving in a bit of silence as if we’re going to cut to credits, before having vriska show up. in the video version, we also had that texton top of 7 dots, reminiscent of vriska’s spidery left eye (or the pokemon registeel, if you’re like me and for some reason that was where your mind wandered to first)

_____

so thats it covered! thank you to stagelights for doing the breakdowns for these episodes! tomorrow we'll have episode 3's breakdown released as well! (and this time i mean it for certain, because i scheduled it at the same time as this post >:P)

[thana-topsy]

Liminal Bridges [Excerpt]

I've made some changes to Liminal Bridges while writing new content/gearing up to start posting again! I've always been the type of fic writer that flat-out refuses to go back and change/edit/re-write things I've already published. HOWEVER. The way the plot is progressing, there were a few things I wanted to tweak in earlier chapters. Namely.... I wanted to add J'zargo into the story. Here's what a couple of scenes from Chapter 7 now look like, featuring my favorite pyromaniac:

--

The classroom was surprisingly full when Neloth pushed through the door and walked to the head of the room. The soft murmur of conversation died immediately as all eyes tracked him with a mixture of nervousness and anticipation. 

“Whatever you think you know about the school of Mysticism, I want you to forget it.” He let the book in his arm fall heavily against the desk. “With the blessed collapse of the Mages Guild, the study of Mysticism has become more and more scant, very rarely leaving the halls of the Psijics on the isle of Artaeum. However, the Telvanni have known and utilized the practices of Mysticism for millennia.” 

He opened the book. There was a soft, collective noise of scrolls being unfurled and ink pot lids being flipped open. 

“First, the thing you must understand above all else is that to study Mysticism is to open your mind to the inherent paradox of reality. It is not for the faint of heart, nor for the weak willed. My intent is not to lead any of you into madness, though it is always a possibility. Now…” Neloth heard someone in the front row of the class audibly swallow. “What types of spells and rituals fall under the category of Mysticism?” He looked out at the class expectantly. 

Silence followed. 

“Sometimes, I ask questions that aren’t meant to be answered, but this one is. So speak up and don’t waste my time.”

“Absorption spells.” The answer came from a Khajiit who sat in the center of the room. He was familiar—the one who had gone toe-to-toe with Neloth in his first lecture on Destruction magic over a year ago.

“Correct. What else?” 

“Teleportation,” the Khajiit answered again. 

“Correct, again. Are you the speaker for the class?” He shrugged and leaned back in his chair with a smirk. “J’zargo seems to be the only one to have answers.”

“Very observant. What else?” Neloth asked him directly this time.

“Soul trapping.”

“What else?” 

J’zargo opened his mouth, then paused, faltering. He looked to one of his classmates beside him, then back to Neloth. “Divination?” 

“Correct.” A slow smile spread across Neloth’s face. “But why?”

“Eh…” The Khajiit’s cool demeanor was gone, replaced with nervous doubt. “This one… does not know.” 

“Then this is where we shall start for today. I do hope the rest of you were writing all this down while your classmate carried your dead weight.” There was a flurry of movement as quills frantically scratched across parchment. 

“We’ll begin with the principles of Mysticism.” 

—

“Master Neloth, I had a question regarding the assignment.” 

The first week of classes had come and gone with relative ease. Neloth had only held two lecture-heavy classes and sent all of his students off to do a significant amount of reading before the next session. It was really quite simple. There was nothing to question. 

“What might that be?” he asked, only half paying attention as he copied his most recent research into his journal.

 “Will we need to know all of Sotha Sil’s lessons on Artaeum for the exam, or are there like… certain terms to memorize?”

Neloth paused in his writing, slowly looking up from his journal. The student, a shaggy-looking Breton boy, took a nervous step backwards. 

”I’m sorry. Were you expecting me to compose a vocabulary list?” 

The student shook his head, dark brown hair falling into his eyes. “No, sir, I just meant—” 

“You just meant ‘are there any shortcuts I can take’? Is that right?” 

“No, I—”

“For the exam, you and you alone, will be required to transcribe from memory the entirety of 3rd of Sun's Dawn, 2920. Any future inane questions will result in more assignments.” Neloth pointed at the door with the tip of his quill. “Out.”  

The boy opened his mouth, sucked in a breath, held it, then quickly ducked his head and strode towards the exit. Neloth went back to copying. It took him a long moment to realize there was someone else still standing in the room. He set his quill down with a loud sigh. “Yes? What else?” 

“This one also has a question, but not about the assignment.” It was the know-it-all Khajiit from class. He had a muscular build beneath his mage’s robes, the fur around his muzzle carefully coiffed into a ridiculous little mustache that framed his mouth. “J’zargo can wait until class, if you’d prefer.” 

“You’re already here and you’re already bothering me. So you might as well waste my time now as opposed to later.” 

The Khajiit smirked, shuffling through his scrolls. “J’zargo simply wanted clarification. You said that Mysticism and The Old Way were used interchangeably by the Psijics. But while ‘The Old Way’ can refer to Mysticism, Mysticism does not necessarily refer to The Old Way, yes?”

“Correct. Because one is a religious philosophy, while the other is a theoretical school of magic.” 

“This one is simply confused by what separates the two.” 

“Did you read Tetronius Lor’s treatise on Mysticism?” 

“Yes, which is why J’zargo is confused.” 

Neloth rubbed at his temples with a sigh, but the question was intelligent enough. Worthy of answering, at least. “The Old Way refers specifically to the practices of the Psijics on Artaeum. They use meditation, thought exercises, and riddles to better connect with what they believe to be the purest form of magicka. The study of Mysticism is far less spiritual, at least as far as House Telvanni is concerned. It’s more of a science than a religion— identifying patterns and working with cause and effect, direct action and reaction. It is something that can be mapped and traced. Experiments can be performed and repeated with reliable results.” 

The Khajiit nodded, looking thoughtful. “Forgive, but are these not the same thing?” 

“Hardly,” Neloth scoffed then paused. “But explain your reasoning.”

“Well, meditation and riddles… This is just another way of identifying patterns, yes? Thought exercises are psychological. Scientific, as you said. So it feels, to this one at least, like it is just splitting whiskers based on pomp and circumstance— one group refusing to be associated with the other.” He tilted his head curiously. “J’zargo thinks it counterproductive to say they are two different things instead of considering them as a whole.”  

Neloth pursed his lips. “J’zargo, was it?”     

“That is this one’s name, yes.”

“Well, J’zargo.” Neloth smiled thinly. “In addition to your reading assignment, I’d like you to write a short essay on the similarities and differences concerning the religious and secular practices of Mysticism.”

J’zargo’s eyes glittered mischievously. “Are you punishing this one for asking questions?” 

“Do you feel punished?” Neloth asked as he leaned back in his chair. J’zargo shook his head. Neloth nodded. “Good. The Arcanaeum should have a copy of Concerning the Psijic Order as well as Origin of the Mages Guild. Those are the main resources you need.” 

“Thank you, Master Neloth.” 

Neloth pointed to the door with the feather end of his quill. “Out.” 

[spnfanficpond]

Rewatching SPN: Fanfic Edition

Hi guys! Admin Marie here!! I’d like to officially invite you to our official rewatch of the series!!!

Our goal is to rewatch the show with fanfic writing in mind. We want to look for all the places in canon where we could add a scene, show a scene from a certain character’s point of view, or change something to make things turn out differently. (We may also critique what the show writers did; that seems inevitable.)

Who’s invited? All Pond members, including Turtles! You don’t have to be a writer to have an opinion on the episodes that could inspire a writer! Everyone has valuable opinions about the show and could spark conversation and inspiration.

How will it work? On our own, whenever we have time, we will all watch two episodes of SPN. Announcement posts will be posted with which episodes we’re watching so we’re all on the same page. Later, we will all get together and chat about them. Although we have several questions to consider and creative ideas for you to do if you want, there is no pressure to actually have answers to these questions or have created anything prior to the chat. Didn’t get to watch them? No biggie! We’ve all watched these episodes enough that we can probably talk about them without rewatching them!

Where will we meet? In the discord server. There will be a special channel for us to chat in so we don’t disturb other chats happening at the same time.

When will the chats happen? Twice a month, on the second and fourth Saturdays of the month, unless otherwise advertised.

Our first chat covering the Pilot and Wendigo episodes will be on Saturday, the 14th of October.

What time will it be for you?

Los Angeles - Saturday 9am

New York - Saturday noon

London - Saturday 5pm

New Delhi - Saturday 9:30pm

Melbourne - Sunday 3am

More info under the cut!

What questions should we consider while we watch? We have a few questions you can keep in mind while you’re watching the episodes:

Are there any “fanfiction gaps” in this episode? Any places between scenes where a juicy story could happen? (For example, one scene ends at night, but the next scene begins during the day, and what did they do with all of that time?)

How would the episode be different if you changed one thing? What is changed is up to you. It could be as complex as a character making a different choice, or as simple or silly as someone wearing a funny hat throughout part or all of the episode.

What about this episode would you like to see happen differently? How would making that change affect future episodes?

List any parts of each episode that you think could be jumping-off points for a fic. Like, in the pilot, how did Sam meet their friend who was in the bar with them?

How would the episode be different if there were another character involved like a reader insert character?

What else can we do before the chat? Besides just discussing the fanfiction possibilities in every episode, we also want to encourage you to create things centered around the episodes we’re discussing and share them with the rest of us. Things like:

Write some meta about some part of the episode. What does this episode show us about one or more of the characters?

Write a fic based around the episode. Share a link to your fic in the discussion and we can talk about it!

Make a playlist that you feel reflects the mood of the episode.

Make some art or a photo collage or edits to go along with the episode.

Format and other things with this may change as we get started and figure out what works best, so keep an eye on our announcement posts for changes. We would like to hear all feedback you have for this project, so let us know what you think! In the meantime, you’ve got about one week to rewatch the first two episodes and think about some of the things we’ll be discussing and be creative. We can’t wait to see what you all bring to the table!

Have questions about this or anything else? Send us an ASK or send a private message to one of the admins below!

Admins:

Michelle - @mrswhozeewhatsis

Marie - @mariekoukie6661

Stacey - @princessmisery666

MJ - @thoughtslikeaminefield

Mana - @manawhaat (Founder and Admin Emeritus)

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

Writing Newsletter #1: March 2024

So! Lil author's note to explain this. I decided to start up a newsletter, monthly, but until I get around to figuring out website hosting &c., to post on here instead of emails. Once I get that sorted, I'll switch this to email, and there'll be a newsletter signup gift of two stories - Ever Changing, Ever Near (hosted on my website until recently) and A Fragile Solace. Together, in unedited form, they're around 3k. They're Inklings stories, both of which were highly commended in the separate competitions I wrote them for. Anyway, if you want to be on the taglist for this monthly newsletter, say the word and I'll add you.

Writing update

Lately, my main project has been Patience, Changing. It’s a story about autism, changes in routine and loving despite the inconvenience. There’s also a spice of mental health in there, because I’m me and that’s what I do. Also my protagonists are eleven and twelve years old. Very fun. Rhona is incredibly over-dramatic and while in some ways she’s justified, in other ways she’s just not—I’ve written a couple of scenes from her perspective that I intend to cut, just because I love her so much. (It’s meant to be all from Patience’s POV.) An interesting thing that I’ve noted in the last few days is the inclusion of a character I’d intended to be already gone before the story began, but on a whim I decided to change the timeline. If you’ve read The Patience of Hope, the character I’m referring to is Hannah—Patience’s aunt, who dies of anorexia complications long before. However, I’ve chosen to include her in Patience, Changing because as someone who suffers from anorexia myself, I felt it was important to include the possible outcomes. I’m not entirely sure what her role in this story is, but I’m discovering that she is very important to Patience, so we’ll see when she dies. I’ll have to edit The Patience of Hope to change that detail, but that’s okay.

This is the second time I’ve made myself cry over a character I originally wrote as dead before I wrote them before they died, but anyway.

In terms of word count, I’ve written 80k of assorted Patience content since I started writing the novella in mid-December, so I’m pretty happy with that.

Reading update

At the moment I’m reading Walking on Water by Madeleine L’Engle for Lent (well—Lent-ish), as well as Cry of the Raven by Morgan L. Busse. This is my first time reading both, and I’m tremendously excited to finish them both. The first Ravenwood book was one of my favourites for a long time and I only recently read Flight of the Raven for the first time. It lived up to my expectations.

I’ll have more to put in this section next newsletter when there’s been a definable sense of time since the last one, so. Yeah.

Ramble

Hi. This is just an area where I can ramble about whatever. Since I’m new to this whole newsletter thing, this one is pretty empty. I’m considering how I want to do this thing—considering whether I add in a Goals section or not, or whether I try and get back to posting on my blog, but anyway. Hopefully here on out will become more polished, or something. This was a pretty last-minute idea—I’ve been kicking around the idea of creating a writing newsletter for a While, but until now didn’t actually get round to it.

Anyway, please contact me and let me know what works best or what you’d most like to see! I need the advice.

Drabble

Under Pressure

“Patience!” he called.

She turned to him with relief, pressing her hands to her face in distress. “Oh, Nathan!” she said, leaning a little towards him. “Why can’t I just—be normal?”

“You’re normal—for you,” he said gently. “The public perception of ‘normal’ is so weirdly skewed it’s crazy. Don’t think any less of yourself just because you can’t handle that.” He gestured to the party they had both left behind. “You’re fine, Patience.”

“I’m autistic,” she said bitterly. “I’ll never cope with the world.”

“That’s not your fault.” He didn’t touch her, only smiled, and she was comforted.

Photo

[be-netz]

— NOW PLAYING: NEXT GEN EPISODE 2

the day of the evaluation… captions overlay the scene of six judges finding their way to their seats in a relatively plain set, a small stage before them obviously prepared for the contestants they’re here to judge today. YOON JIHUN is the first to enter with SEO RAN close behind, idly chatting with YOOJUNG who enters with her as they find their seats at the judges’ table. J-YOON is next to enter, greeting his ceo and the other judges before quietly taking his seat. is he the loner of the group…? the captions assume, though the thought is quickly discarded when YUNA and BOM enter together, arms interlocked as they whisper something between them before taking their seats as well.

“so,” jihun is the first to address the group as a whole, placing his attention in particular on the three judges who also helped train the idol wannabes during the last several days. “what should i be looking most forward to today? any surprises?” he clasps his hands together and leans forward against the table as if in anticipation.

a soft smile crosses yoojung’s face. “there’s a lot of talented dancers in this group. and a lot who are not, but made huge improvements in a very short time. i think some of them will manage to surprise you.” 

bom, on the other hand, simply scowls. she says nothing and instead, the editors add in a few clips of a similar glare on her face when working with the contestants during their lessons.

“there wasn’t a big rap part in this song,” j-yoon admits with a shrug. “i think it’s something anyone with a basic understanding of music could pull off. but i’m interested to see what yoojung and bom made of the dancers and vocalists too.”

“shall we see our first contestant, then?” RHEE JIAN appears on stage, ready to introduce the contestants one by one to the judges. “they’re all waiting so nervously backstage. after working so hard these last several days, let’s call them in right away.” though her words are surely part of a script, the judges all nod their heads as if giving approval for judgment day to begin.

“those who ranked low during their auditions have the most potential for growth, so today we’ll go in order from who ranked last to first place. which means the first performance of the day will be… LEE NOEL,”

a short clip of noel entering the stage and bowing to the judges is shown before being replaced by scenes of a practice room and noel rehearsing with other contestants. it’s group dance practice and the editing makes it seem as if noel is making mistake after mistake and the doom and gloom of the editing is punctuated by tense sound effects and music. “i placed last,” noel’s voice cuts over the sounds before the scene of him in the interview room takes over the compilation of his mistakes. “while it doesn’t bother me, i do want to prove that i deserve more than last place.” clips of noel practicing with other participants show then; practicing vocals with hyejin and dohyun, and dance with seojun.

the scene changes again, now back to the stage in front of the judges, and noel performs my turn in front of the group. no comment is made by either the judges or the captions and silence follows the conclusion of his performance, the only sound heard the breathing of the contestant who just performed.

“lee noel,” it’s jihun who picks up his microphone first to give his evaluation of the performance after the tense quiet, “do you really want to be here?” his words are harsh and his expression not much kinder. the camera zooms in on noel’s face for his reaction to the criticism.

“your performance isn’t memorable at all. aren’t you nervous? don’t you want to do well? your attitude doesn’t seem to reflect that. we invited you to participate in this show despite hundreds— no, thousands of auditions. do you even care?”

“he’s angry,” the microphones catch ran whispering to yuna.

yoojung picks up his microphone next, his expression rather serious though softer than the last speaker’s. “noel, you auditioned with dance and you definitely improved with practice over these last several days. it’s good to know that you can learn and make adjustments when we give you critique. but there’s a lot of good dancers in this competition. i don’t know if you can surpass them if you want to rise above your current rank.”

“you should understand that your place on this show is in danger,” bom, as usual, does not mince her words as she speaks directly to the young man.

“as a not very good dancer and far from a good singer, it felt like i had to learn two things at once,” noel’s interview comes back to the screen, sad music playing as if to garner sympathy for the young man. “i guess that was the most difficult thing, everything at once.”

it’s jian’s face that takes up the screen next, smiling to the camera despite the harsh critique from the last performance. “our next contestant is HWANG BADA,” she announces as the camera zooms in on the girl entering the stage, looking a bit nervous as she does so. ran tries to send her an encouraging smile from the judges’ table.

“the cameras are a bit nerve-wracking, don’t you think?” bada’s voice plays over the scene of her very intentionally meeting the eyes of the judges. “before this, i just worked at my family’s store.” the scene shifts to bada in the practice rooms, rehearsing with hyejin, stevie, haein, and in the group lessons. “i’m going to give it my all. my performance may not be the best, but it’s definitely my best.”

unfortunately, no sooner does the music start does bada make a mistake. she misses the first beat and the camera focuses in on yoojung wincing at the error. the mistake is played again, though this time it shows she recovers and pushes through. she’s out of breath, her voice cracks, but she still continues on. the camera focuses on bom, whose expression is hard to read.

“bada,” it’s ran who speaks first this time her voice gentle and words mostly kind, “you know, right? it wasn’t a perfect performance. but what we’re looking for more than perfection is your potential. how much did you improve from the last time we saw you? were you able to take critique, to ask for help when you needed it? this is a program to discover talent we want to sign to our companies and continue to nurture. no one is expecting you to be ready to debut tomorrow.”

“your voice was better in practice,” it’s bom who speaks next, the editing of the scene alluding to tension as if bom will rip the girl’s performance to shreds. “but that’s to be expected. you have a lot to learn still. what i liked about your performance is that despite your mistakes, you did not give up. tenacity is an important trait to have as a trainee and an idol.”

“did you just say something nice to someone?” yuna picks up her microphone to tease bom, who just smiles and laughs a bit in return. “you worked hard bada,” yuna congratulates the girl despite the flaws in her performance. “like the others said, there’s still a lot to learn. but you seem eager to learn it, and that’s all we can ask for. great job.”

warm music plays as bada takes her leave from the stage before showing a short compilation of her last several days of training. most notably, a clip of her in tears contrasts a clip of a smiling, laughing face. keep working hard, bada! the captions cheer her on.

“up next, a mysterious man who tends to keep to himself, GEUN WONJAE,” rian announces. the scene changes to a series clips of wonjae sitting by himself during breaks in practice and rehearsing alone. 

“he looks tired,” j-yoon murmurs to no one in particular as wonjae takes the stage.

“was he up all night practicing?” yoojung wonders aloud, the other idols among the judges frowning seemingly in sympathy as they watch the young man ready himself for his performance.

wonjae makes the same mistake bada did, missing the first beat. his whole performance seems slightly off, as if his body is too tired and sluggish to respond the way he wants it to. he’s clearly frustrated by the end of his performance, the cameras catching the way his hands ball into tight fists by his sides.

“before we talk about your performance,” ran’s brow knits together as she speaks, seemingly genuinely concerned for the young man, “did you get any sleep at all last night? we know that everyone is working hard for this show but it’s important to get your rest when you can. when you’re tired, you can make a mistake and injure yourself.”

“i don’t think we can say much about this performance, to be honest,” jihun speaks next. “wonjae, we know that you did not show us your best side today. it’s not really fair to judge you based on this. i don’t think we can give you a very high score for this but i hope that you take better care of yourself going forward. we want to see the performer we recognized from your audition, not this.”

wonjae is dismissed from the stage and bom lets out a large sigh. “i wish we hadn’t started from the bottom ranks, actually. i think i’m wasting my time hoping for a big surprise.”

“next we’d like to welcome to the stage… SEO JUNHO!” jian is shown giving a small round of applause as the next contestant takes the stage. the cameras show him settling into position briefly before changing the scene, now showing his time preparing for this moment. he glares at himself in the mirror while he tries to perfect the routine. shots of the camera crews packing up and leaving while junho continues to practice late into the night are played with the caption he worked so hard for this moment… is displayed on the screen. a shot of his notes and annotations of the lyrics is shared with the audience. it’s clear that seo junho is one contestant who is taking this show very seriously. maybe bom will finally get the surprise that she’s hoping for.

junho’s performance begins without any long preamble. it’s immediately clear that his hard work has paid off; compared to the last contestants, his moves are much sharper, his voice much more stable. it’s not a perfect performance, but the editors show off his best moves multiple times, cut with the subtle impressed eyebrow raise from jihun himself. 

“i want to be the first to speak,” j-yoon hardly lets the music fade away before he’s picking up his microphone, “i feel like i need to apologize. i might have been to harsh on your during the last episode. you’ve absolutely made me eat my words since then,” j-yoon looks absolutely delighted to be proven wrong by the contestant, a smile lighting up his features despite his apology.

“i have to agree,” yuna speaks next. “i think your performance is the largest improvement we’ve seen in a contestant so far. it’s amazing, to be honest. you shone brighter here, with one chance to get it right, than you did in your audition tape with however many takes you put into that. great job, junho. we can’t wait to see what you do next.”

“LEE SEOJUN,” it’s not rian who calls his name but rather an unnamed staff member. the cameras are sure to pick up the way he jumps to attention, ready to take the stage in front of the judges. jian’s formal announcement is seen next, and after one more quick moment of seojun looking anticipatory for his turn on stage, finally he’s seen walking out in front of the judges.

“so many people have made this a lot of fun to be a part of,” seojun’s voice plays over clips of him practicing with wonjae, stevie, noel. it shifts to show several scenes with one person in particular, haneul. “my best friend, haneul, helped, since we practiced together as much as possible.” a soft filter and equally soft music plays as one last clip of the best friends practicing together is shown. a clip of seojun smiling softly in the interview room finishes off the segment.

with the week’s recap completed, it’s time to see the young man’s performance. it’s clear that he’s a confident performer on stage, his movements sharp and voice clear despite the choreography. even bom is seen nodding her head as she jots notes down about the performance. “i think we’re finally just getting to the better contestants,” she murmurs to her neighbor.

seojun’s performance comes to a close and a short round of applause is held for him. jihun picks up his microphone first. “to be honest, i think that this is the most complete performance that we’ve seen so far. you’re a strong dancer and while your vocals could use some work, they didn’t suffer terribly despite the dance. you did a good job.”

“i agree,” yuna nods along with jihun before chiming in, “there were a couple little pitch and support issues but nothing that some practice couldn’t fix. i think we judged you too harshly in the auditions. you definitely shine on stage, lee seojun. great job.” more happy music plays as seojun takes his leave from the stage and the judges look pleased with what they’ve been seeing so far.

the show must move along and jian is already announcing the next contestant to the stage: MOON CAMERON. he smiles as he greets the judges again and the camera focuses in on ran, who can’t help but smile back. “you think he’s cute, don’t you?” jihun teases her despite her pushing him away playfully and denying all accusations. “it’s interesting to have siblings on the show, that’s all,” ran insists.

scenes of a practice room where both siblings rehearse is shown before cameron’s performance can start. “i can’t let myself be too shown up by my little sister,” he says as the screen shows him playfully scolding his sister. “why did i find out you auditioned by seeing you on actual television?”

“seeing her throw her all into this has really pushed me to do the same,” a shot of cameron in the interview room is shown next, camera zooming in on that soft, brotherly smile he has on his face whenever he talks about his little sister.

cameron’s performance begins next, displaying excellent command over the stage that clearly comes from a place of experience. most notably, he sends a wink in the direction of the judges. yuna, ran, and yoojung all exclaim out loud at the gesture. “that was cute!” ran gushes and jihun only nudges her again to tease her lightly. the performance wraps up and all of the judges seem to have enjoyed it thoroughly despite it being the fifth time they’ve heard the same song. 

“you have much more experience than most of the other contestants in this show,” j-yoon speaks first, struggling to be serious despite the lingering smile from enjoying the performance so much. “to be honest, i think we’re holding you to a higher standard than the others. i’m not sure if that’s fair but we do want to see your max potential. you still have room to grow.”

“i think i speak for everyone when i say that we thoroughly enjoyed your performance,” yuna speaks next. “it’s fun to watch a performer who looks so at home on stage. there’s some issues with your singing that i’m sure bom will want to address,” the camera shows bom nodding briefly before returning to yuna, “but overall, a good show.”

as cameron is dismissed, the judges check their cue cards for who comes next despite jian’s announcements. “YEOM SARANG,” the emcee announces and the judges begin murmuring among themselves.

“i think he’s the best looking of the male contestants,” yuna comments.

“yes, but a pretty face does not an idol make,” bom’s stern manner never takes a break.

that said, it’s clear that sarang is popular among his fellow contestants. clips of him practicing with others rather closely are played and the captions and editing seem to be jokingly implying that even his fellow male participants have a crush on him. they show him winking at matthew, working closely with jinyoung. “i really enjoyed learning not only from the coaches, but from the friends i’ve made here as well,” sarang’s voice carries over the compilation of clips.

more important than friendship is his turn to perform, however. he captivates the judges, even jihun neglecting to write too many notes as he watches and listens to the young man give his all into his performance of my name. “i’m confident in what i showed,” sarang’s voice can he heard again as he holds the finishing pose.

“let me be the first to speak,” yoojung is the first to pipe up once the spell has worn off. “sarang, you clearly have a lot of untapped potential and i think this particular song was a great opportunity for you. it suits you well. however,” the camera zooms in on sarang’s face for a reaction, the sound effects tense as if yoojung is about to drop a bomb on the situation. “you dance style did not suit the choreography at all. if you’re going to debut in a group someday, you need to be able to mold yourself to the concept. i didn’t always feel that i suited all of a.maze’s concepts, but they needed me to, so i did. you need to learn the same,”

“while i agree with yoojung,” yuna adds to the conversation, “i do want to make sure we commend you for your stage presence and performance overall. a great job, truly.”

if sarang was popular, then PARK STEVEN is basically a celebrity among the trainees. jian’s voice can be heard announcing his turn to perform as the camera shows him going around and greeting all of his friends backstage still waiting for their turns. next gen’s social butterfly, reads the captions. various scenes of steven working with other trainees, comforting them, crying with them can be seen.

“i’ll give it everything i got. no regrets from me!” stevie’s voice plays as he takes his place on stage. he begins his performance when prompted, the camera occasionally cutting to yoojung who nods, j-yoon who scribbles something down, and yuna who seems fixated on the performance with rapt attention. he finishes with a large smile and ran can be seen smiling back.

someone who is not smiling, however, is bom. “steven,” she speaks first among the judges, “i said it before and i’ll say it again. you need to take this competition more seriously.” she fixes him with a rather stern look and doesn’t stop there, “this is not daycare. we’re not here for you to have a playdate with your friends. when we scold you, it’s because we know you can do better. you should be doing better than this.”

a clip plays of stevie in the practice room, trying to lift his leg behind his head when he should’ve been rehearsing. suddenly his social butterfly tendencies don’t seem to be as much of an asset as they are a distraction.

“i have to agree with bom. you’re a good dancer. if you want to be a backup dancer and support our idols on stage, that’s fine. but that’s not what this competition is for. i hope to see more improvement from you moving forward,” yuna explains to the young contestant.

after so many male contestants, finally another female contestant is ready for her turn in front of the judges. “up next,” jian announces, “we’ll see RYU EUNKYUNG,” a shot of the girl raising her fist and mouthing a silent cheer is shown as she takes the stage. 

“over and over we’ve worked on this and you’re still getting it wrong,” the scene changes to eunkyung getting scolded by one of the coaches. in the next series of clips, it’s shown how many times she’s forgotten the lyrics or made a major mistake. “somehow it all goes out of my brain when i start to dance,” eunkyung’s own voice is heard as she makes yet another mistake on screen. will she be able to pull it off? the captions question her abilities, drawing tension as once again she’s shown on stage in front of the judges.

her performance begins. it seems that the whole world is watching with their breath held as they wait to see if she’ll make a mistake again or not. what she does instead is make little modifications to the choreography. she cups her hands against her face to send a heart instead of the “v” pose and a shot of ran cooing at the modification is shown before returning to eunkyung’s performance. the line she struggled the most with is coming, though. j-yoon leans forward in his seat, eyes narrowed as he waits. not only does she not flub it, she nails it. a sigh of relief seems to fall and j-yoon sits back, nodding his approval.

“you had me worried, eunkyung,” he speaks after her performance is finished, smiling now that it’s all over. “i’m glad you were able to work out your issues with the lyrics. overcoming obstacles is an important part of breaking into this industry. you’re going to have much more difficult challenges than this going forward.”

“to be honest, i think you’re center material,” ran speaks up, “i know, i haven’t said that to anyone else yet. you’re confident and while your skills could use some work, you’re doing an excellent job all things considered. keep up the good work.”

“so many cameras,” the translation of SATO KOU’s statement is shown in subtitles on the screen. the scene changes this time to kou in the interview room, where he once again says the same thing: “this is a lot of cameras.” is he camera shy? the captions question.

“we’re looking forward to kou’s performance,” jian announces. earlier that week… the captions interrupt the performance with a scene of the boy in a practice room, clearly frustrated even before he exclaims “i can’t do it!” clips of kou’s mistakes in dance practice play one after the other, highlighting all of his many errors. “i just wasn’t born with the ability to dance, you see. see? my arms just won’t listen to my head.”

“i’ve been practicing like crazy,” kou’s voice is heard while the camera returns to the scene in front of the judges. “i think i’ve improved a lot. at least i won’t look like an idiot on stage… i hope.”

the boy’s face lights up as he begins his performance and the judgest watch, paying careful attention to him. yoojung in particular seems anxious, having seen the boy in practice not all that long ago. “please don’t mess up,” he murmurs, barely loud enough that the microphones can pick it up. thankfully, kou doesn’t make a mistake and completes the performance without any major catastrophe.

“you had me so worried,” yoojung laughs the tension away as he addresses the contestant. “i’m glad that you were able to pull it off in the end and i hope that this is the end of your dancing woes. it’s a skill that you absolutely need if you want to be an idol. please, keep practicing.”

“i would’ve liked to see more improvement from you, though,” jihun remarks, a slight frown on his face. “you’re a decent singer, kou. but i feel like you just got lucky with your dancing here, based on what yoojung was telling us earlier. i hope that you can prove me wrong and show that it truly was skill.”

a scary contestant is next, the captions, in cold, shivery effect, appear on screen. “if i’m making you cry, you should quit now,” LEE NAYOUNG’s voice can be heard. “have you been practicing outside of lessons at all? do you even have your sheet of the lyrics? what are you doing here?” clips of nayoung confronting various contestants are played on screen. she’s scarier than bom, the captions claim, showing a side-by-side shot of bom’s glare compared to nayoung’s.

“please welcome lee nayoung to the stage,” jian announces the contestant dutifully. unlike the scary clips from earlier, nayoung is all smiles to the judges as she greets everyone politely. it turns out that she has a reason to scold the other trainees, her performance goes off not quite flawlessly but clearly more skilled than many of the contestants before her.

“did you know that people are saying you’re scarier than i am?” bom addresses the girl with the slightest hint of a smile on her face. “i was worried that you would be all bark and no bite. i’m pleased that you have the skill to back your words up. you could practice your stability more. but overall, good job.”

“i would caution you to try to get along better with the other contestants,” ran frowns into her microphone, “we understand this is a competition. but if you’re going to join one of our companies, we need to know that you’ll be a good fit with our current trainees. if you can’t get along with anyone, we’ll have reason to be concerned.”

LEE JINAE’s performance is next. it seems to breeze by with no context at all. “it was entirely unmemorable,” jihun points out to his fellow judges, who seem to agree. no one can even remember what she practiced all week.

completely on the opposite side of the spectrum is MIN HYEJIN. as jian announces her name, clips of her practicing with several different contestants play across the screen. matthew, noel, haein, bada, nayoung, saea, kou, and of course stevie are all seen practicing with the girl at different times. if stevie was the social butterfly of the boys, hyejin takes the title for the girls. “there were so many helpful participants and so many i made sure to lend a helping hand to as well,” her voice is heard over the clips.

her performance starts. there’s hiccups, like every contestant so far, but the cameras seem to focus on them much more than the others. the judges faces don’t look as excited about hyejin’s performance as they had about others.

“hyejin,” yuna sighs before continuing, “i understand that you worked with a lot of different people and spent a lot of time helping them. that’s great, and we love to see that sort of teamwork, but i think your performance suffered for it. you should have spent a little more time on yourself.”

“i want to remind you to mind your expressions too,” j-yoon adds. “you had moments where you were really good. but then you’d lose that and it was such a shame. i agree with yuna, i think you overextended yourself helping others. you should be more mindful of your time in the future.”

the scene cuts away from hyejin, indicating her segment is over, and instead focuses on jian again as she announces the next performance. “our next contestant ready to show you his skills is CHO HANEUL,” the young man is seen taking the stage and giving a polite bow to the judges. jihun smiles and nods approvingly; it seems he cares very much about the manners and attitude of all of the participants.

“if i’m really honest, i almost didn’t audition,” haneul’s voice is heard as he waits for the music to start. “i keep thinking if i should have done this or not,” clips of his practice sessions, including a sweet hug with stevie, play across the screen, highlighting all of the highs and lows of the last several days. “but might as well do my best while i’m here, right?”

the music starts and haneul’s performance begins. he’s an adept performer, singing and dancing solidly until the short rap part of the song comes up. when his pronunciation is slightly off on one word, the cameras zoom in on j-yoon scribbling something down in his notes.

“haneul,” j-yoon is the first to give his critique once the music ends and the contestant relaxes from his ending pose, “first of all, i want to praise you for trying something outside of your comfort zone. it’s clear you know how to sing and dance but rap was something new for you. that said, to be completely honest, i don’t think it’s something you should do anymore.”

ran’s eyebrows raise at the unexpected harsh critique from j-yoon, who ignores the looks he’s getting and continues. “let me be clear. you’re a good singer and dancer. i don’t think you need to rap. i understand it was part of this evaluation but i think going forward it would be better for you to focus on the things you’re already good at.”

“i get what j-yoon means,” jihun nods along as he speaks, “instead of wasting your time and energy trying to perfect something that honestly doesn’t really matter, focus on your other skills instead. i think that will take you farther in this competition. good job, haneul.”

the young man bows politely as he’s dismissed. “i like him,” jihun says aloud.

“don’t go picking favorites this early,” yuna warns playfully, “i might like him too.”

a shot of the waiting room takes over the scene. after a slow pan of the remaining contestants waiting for their turn, the camera zooms in on the next one up: PARK DOHYUN. he seems to be staring off into space. is he awake? the captions question as a sped-up shot of his fellow contestants and staff zipping around the waiting room plays while dohyun himself simply sits still. “learning the lyrics and dance… it was kinda like a bootcamp,” dohyun’s voice speaks over the scene. the editing makes it seem as if he’s a bit dazed and confused, as if the hard work of the past week has completely robbed him of any remaining branpower. 

in the next moment, jian is welcoming him to the stage in front of the judges. as the music starts, it seems that he hasn’t fully snapped out of his trance and misses his cue. he’s flushed in the face when he does get back on track. “is he alright?” ran whispers to yuna, who frowns in concern at dohyun’s performance.

when he finally reaches the end of his performance, he’s out of breath. a few silent moments pass before yoojung speaks. “dohyun, you’ve learned a lot in a short time,” he praises the contestant first, smiling encouragingly, “but to be honest, i’m concerned about you. are you feeling alright? are you ill?”

the camera zooms in on dohyun’s face as if looking for any ailment.

“this is a competition but you can’t be reckless with your body. i understand desperation to be signed and to debut. but certain injuries can’t quite be recovered from. you’re just starting to learn dance. don’t make it harder for yourself by getting hurt.”

“yoojung is right,” yuna speaks next. “we see your improvement, dohyun. i can’t say you’re a good dancer yet, to be honest. but if you can stay healthy, i think you can become one.”

with dohyun’s performance complete, the scene goes back to the waiting room. the crowd is getting smaller and smaller as more and more contestants take their turn in front of the judges. finally, it focuses in on the next performer: MOON JINYOUNG. he looks nervous or at the very least restless as he gets to his feet to pace, to practice the song and dance one more time, humming the melody as he runs through the movements.

he’s seen walking on stage as jian announces his name. “i’m fine. it just hit me, you know? this is real.” his voice is heard as he looks at the judges with his chin held high, masking any fear that he might have had going into this. jinyoung tests his voice once, twice, before assuming the starting position and waiting for the music to start. unlike the last performer, he doesn’t miss his start. but the problems start when he sings. the camera cuts to bom who can barely disguise a rather repulsed expression as she scribbles notes down in font of her.

jinyoung is red in the face much like dohyun had been by the time his performance comes to an end. 

“i heard that you’re a big fan of yoojung,” it’s ran who speaks first, not yet critiquing jinyoung’s performance but holding a conversation instead. a clip plays of jinyoung and sarang in a practice room together. “i want to be yoojung when i grow up,” jinyoung had said then. the scene returns to ran, who’s smiling at her fellow judge as she speaks to jinyoung. “it’s clear that you’re a talented dancer. maybe the best we’ve seen today. but dancing alone isn’t enough to be like your idol. yoojung is a talented singer too. to be honest, you have a long way to go in that area.”

“i’m disappointed, to be honest,” bom speaks up, barely looking up from her notes at the young man she’s addressing. “you did better in practice. there’s no excuse for what you showed us on stage today. if you want to continue in this competition, you need to be much better.”

the humiliated contestant bows as he says his farewell to the judges, bright red in the face. even he doesn’t look satisfied with his performance.

“up next,” jian is the center of the screen again, smiling as she reads the name off her cue card, “MOON SAEA, our little sister.” the scene changes to saea in the practice room, first bickering with her actual brother cameron, then hanging out with stevie, calling hyejin ‘unnie’, and even pouting in the interview room rather cutely. children’s music plays in the background, painting the girl with a cute, childish image.

however, that childish image changes abruptly when she’s shown standing in front of the judges, seemingly more cool and collected than the playful girl they had already shown in practice. as soon as the music starts, the performer takes over. yoojung can be seen nodding approvingly at her performance and even jihun seems to be impressed, brows raised as he scribbles a note down in front of him.

“first of all, i want to say that you put on an excellent performance,” jihun’s praise has been increasingly rare for the duration of this show, so the other judges are shown with rather surprised expressions as he compliments saea. “i think you already know and bom will likely say more than me on it but your singing still needs work. still, you held your own. learning these things in such a short time is difficult but you proved today it’s far from impossible.”

“you’re doing well at rap,” j-yoon adds as well. “is this your first time practicing and performing it? i think with practice and training, you might have a future in it. i’m excited to see what you’re capable of in the future.”

“we’re getting closer to last week’s number one,” jian takes over again as the show transitions to the next contestant. “next to perform for our judges is MATTHEW LUONG.”

“i’m very grateful for being ranked in the top ten, let alone the top five,” matthew’s voice is played over a scene of him in the waiting room, anxiously anticipating his turn. “i just was worried that i was going to let people down.” a shot of him approaching the stage is cut off by a practice room scene, matthew attempting to sing the song perhaps for the first time. it’s clear that he’s not yet a vocalist, making many mistakes during his attempt. “i don’t know if i want to go for the first place spot,” his voice is heard again, “i’m so nervous that i’m just going to disappoint everyone.”

the scene cuts back to matthew on stage, the judges staring at him expectantly. as the music begins, so does his performance. while his voice doesn’t compare to some of the stronger vocalists in the competition, he’s not all that bad and his top five spot isn’t undeserved. he seems to lose a bit of strength as the performance wraps up, and yoojung’s sharp eye is sure to catch that. the camera focuses on the judge after the music ends.

“how long have you been practicing singing?” yuna is the first to speak up despite the initial focus on yoojung. “was this your first time performing it seriously? you did a good job,” she smiles as she praises the contestant. “it was fun to watch you. it looked like you were genuinely enjoying your time on stage and as an audience member, that makes such a difference. i hope you continue to love performing. that will take you farther in this industry than anything.”

“your voice needs work,” bom can never seem to just give a compliment. “but you improved a lot in a short time. you need to work on your control and pitch. keep this in mind.” her words are short but at least they don’t seem as harsh as she’s been on others.

matthew is dismissed and the next contestant is called to the stage, announced by jian with another glowing smile. ZHOU AREN RENYI is looking rather pale in the face as he stands before the judges. “i know that people expect a lot because i was ranked so high. but truthfully, i don’t know why i’m ranked so high,” ren’s voice is played over a zoomed-in clip of his trembling hands.

“are you nervous, renyi?” jihun speaks before the performance begins. the camera just zooms in on the boy’s nervous face as an answer.

renyi’s performance begins. there’s obvious mistakes, he stops singing at one point entirely, and bom is seen scowling and writing notes down. ran leans forward in her seat, brows creased in concern. the judges all saw potential in this contestant; they just hope that he can live up to it. and in parts, he does. his expressions are good despite the obvious nerves, even biting down on his lip as the camera catches his face just right. but perhaps most surprising is when he stops dancing entirely near the end, instead singing the high note with full strength. bom’s brows raise in a way that’s hard to tell if it’s a good or bad thing. he continues the dance for the last bit and all the judges scribble something in front of them.

“you made an… interesting choice,” ran puts it more nicely than some of the other judges might have as they begin their verbal evaluation of renyi. “i understand that you’re not very experienced as a performer yet. but halting your dance so you could sing… it’s something that we incorporate into choreography for main vocalists at times, though it wasn’t part of this routine.”

“others were able to sing and dance during that part just fine,” bom’s harsh critique doesn’t soften for the clearly nervous boy, though perhaps she’s not as mean as she could be. “if you want to keep up in this competition, you should try to mimic the good parts of your peers and be better than their flaws. i’m not sure we saw a top three performance from you today.”

when renyi bows, he lurches forward, falling to a knee as he loses strength. immediately, all six of the judges spring to their feet. “are you alright?” yuna calls out to the boy as yoojung tries to escape the judges’ table to help the contestant to his feet. however, ren excuses himself and skitters away before anyone can reach him. “can someone go check on him?” yuna asks the staff. someone follows renyi out to make sure that he’s unhurt.

the judges still look somewhat unnerved by the nearly collapsed contestant when jian is announcing the next one up to perform, JUNG JOOMI. “his skillset is similar to renyi’s,” jihun points out, a small frown still on his face. unspoken worry seems to mingle through the group of judges.

it seems that the boys also have similarities in temperament as well and the scene changes to a practice room, captions explaining that this is the first day of practice for the mission. joomi is crying, stevie comforting him as best as he can. “i honestly… i didn’t know i could sing before coming on here,” his voice is played over the shot before it transitions to him in the interview room looking at anything but the eye of the camera. “i’m not confident but i’m glad i made it through.”

joomi’s performance is… well, it’s hard to say it’s anything close to good. his dance is a mess, his voice falters for the energy put into dancing, and overall it’s rather a disappointing performance from the second place winner. there’s a long silence between when the music ends and the judges start to verbalize their evaluation of the contestant.

finally, bom is the first to speak. and despite her harsh reputation, her words seem to be a bit softer. “i feel like we should apologize to you, joomi,” she holds the microphone with both hands as she looks directly at the contestant. “you’re a very talented singer but second place put a lot of pressure on you. i don’t think you were ready for that pressure. and we didn’t see the singer we all fell in love with today. i’m sorry for that, too.”

ran’s lips press tightly together as if she’s struggling to find the words as she raises her microphone as well. “today’s performance wasn’t good. but i’m sure you already know,” she has to be honest with him though it seems that the judges are treating him more gently than they’ve treated others. some contestants require tough love, some require gentle encouragement. “i hope you feel proud of what you’ve learned in the meantime. i think you have a lot to learn and a long way to go but i think you can get there eventually. we’re cheering for you, joomi!” she raises her fist in a silent fighting! and yoojung, j-yoon, yuna, and even jihun do the same to encourage the boy in front of them.

as joomi leaves the stage, jihun sighs. “that was a shame,” he sinks in his seat a bit. “i think you hit the nail on the head, bom. we put too much pressure on him before he was ready. part of developing talent is knowing when and where to apply the right amount of pressure.”

“our final contestant is our number one place,” jian takes over the screen and transforms the dull mood into something more anticipatory, more exciting. “please welcome to the stage our defending first-place, OH HAEIN!”

the girl’s smiling face is seen bright and cheery as she takes her place on the stage. jihun straightens up again and the rest of the judges shake off their dreary moods to watch with rapt attention. this is the defending champion, the most anticipated performance of the episode. next gen’s ace, the captions claim as clips of haein helping other contestants learn and perform their skills play across the screen. she seems adept in everything she does. the editing really hypes up her upcoming performance.

without making the audience wait too much longer, haein is shown again in front of the judges, the music starting. unlike some of the last contestants who didn’t live up to their placement, haein does. she smiles through her performance, she seems to shine on stage. the judges are thoroughly engrossed in the performance, watching closely and even forgetting to write down any notes as they simply enjoy the song and dance despite seeing it over twenty times already.

as the music comes to a close, the six judges give the contestant a small round of applause.

“as expected of our first-place,” yuna smiles into her microphone like a proud mother. “haein, you’re a very talented performer. any critique we have is relatively minor, which is a huge compliment to you and your abilities. i would just say to mind your expressions a little better. you were smiling but i’m not sure you were engaged the entire time. don’t forget the audience in front of you. they’re the ones you’re performing for.”

“we had a lot of talented performers today,” jihun cautions, “i’m not sure if you can maintain your number one position and be our female center but you’ve certainly made it a difficult decision for us. great work today. we’ll be excited to see your next performance.”

with that, the last contestant is dismissed and the judges are tasked with ranking all of the performers from first to last yet again. their discussion starts, clips of them moving photos around and commenting on various performances playing while tense music plays in the background.

finally, all of the contestants are called to the stage to reveal the rankings and centers for the mcountdown performance. “first, we want to congratulate all of you on completing the mission successfully and safely,” jian addresses all of the participants with a smile. “as much as we’d like to award all of you for a job well done, the judges do have to rank you accordingly and pick our centers. please turn your attention to the screen.”

on a large television screen at the back of the stage, the rankings are revealed one by one, starting by counting down from the top fifteen until they get to number five. then, ranks sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, and twenty are revealed. six contestants remain, five of them at the top, and the remaining in dead last. one by one, five, four, three, and two are revealed until just first and last place are left. both ranks are revealed at the same time.

“congratulations to SAEA and JUNHO, our official centers!” jian announces the rankings. time is given for the contestants to react to the news and congratulate the winners before the show continues. the contestants are told that the entire group will be performing on mcountdown next thursday, march 9th, and that some of their practice this week will be devoted to running the routine as a group and nailing down the blocking for the various parts. all contestants will record the male or female parts in full and the final song will be released for digital download on the same day as their performance.

“and of course, we have to introduce your next mission as well,” jian smiles at the contestants while the screen on stage changes from their rankings to a title card that reads teamwork evaluation. “you’ve shown us the talents you’re most confident in already but so far, all of our missions have been independent. we want to test how you work together in a team. our judges have split you into six groups based on what they feel your strongest skill is. this evaluation will be our first elimination round with two teams of the same skill going head to head. the winning team will be safe from elimination while the losing team will risk sending some of their members home.”

each team is announced and the songs they’re expected to perform introduced to them. jian explains that they’ll continue to have lessons with the coaches and that bom, j-yoon, and yoojung will be staying on the program as skill coaches for the remainder of the season.

“good luck to all of our contestants! remember, we’re looking at you to be the next generation of kpop. show us that you can shine!” the main theme of the show begins playing again as the episode ends.

[wunderlass]

I posted 181 times in 2022

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

January reading round-up

I'm going to try to do this on a monthly basis to keep me on track. I'm trying to read more books this year instead of endlessly scrolling through social media.

In January I read:

Vampire Academy (first in the series, as part of a group re-read)

Perfect Past Tenses in Italian (nf)

Spinning Silver

The Copper Promise

The Girl at Rosewood Hall

The Ancient Guide to Modern Life (nf)

The Rough Guide to Green Living (nf)

Customer Persuasion (nf)

Still Waters

Go Make a Difference (nf)

3 notes - Posted February 7, 2022

#4

Hi! Haven't actually posted about Maneskin before beyond reblogging a few gif sets, but I'm having thoughts and want to write them down.

Mostly this post boils down to me being whelmed by Supermodel. Not over, not under, just whelmed. It's catchy enough.

Firstly - Damiano's vocals do seem like a step forward, and I wonder if this was him pushing himself or new producers doing it. A+ there, really showcases what he can do.

Beyond that - well...

Did it really take eight people to write this song?

It feels like a regression for the band, back to some of the poppier roots from IBDV, which is fine, except it's weaker than those songs. This was was a really basic track that seemed to end before it got going. Verse, chorus, little guitar break, repeat - oh wait we're done? It's over? It wouldn't have hurt to add a proper middle eight that REALLY explodes and then come back to the chorus. You can even do a radio edit to cut that out if you're fishing for radio play.

Also, nearly the first minute is just Damiano's voice and the guitar with the barest hint of the rhythm section. So that's nearly half the song feeling like an introduction. It feels unbalanced for something so short.

Also also, where is Vic's bass? One of the key features of the band's sound is how prominent the bass is, often carrying the melody as much as the guitar does. It's completely MIA here, buried in the mix.

Finally - I hope the song pops more live. Otherwise it's going to seem especially pallid next to Zitti e Buoni when they perform it tomorrow.

P.S. I'm going to Circo Massimo alone in July so if anybody wants to adopt an English woman in her mid 30s for the day...I can pay in gelato

6 notes - Posted May 13, 2022

#3

Coda

I hate how it ended for Echo. Here's how I fixed it without them having to spend any more time on the final scene. Thanks, as always, to @maxortecho for the beta work.

The desert air is cold and sharp on Liz’s cheeks, adding to the sting of tears clinging to her skin. She hates how they cloud her vision as she takes in what will be her last sight of Max for nobody knows how long. It could be weeks. Months. Forever.

Dallas is already on the other side of the portal, surrounded by unearthly structures in gleaming crystal. Waiting patiently for Max to join him, for their work to begin.

Max is framed by the stone archway of the portal, dark hair lit by the glow of the strange light filtering through from Oasis. She ought to be fascinated by what’s on the other side of it, but she can’t bear to tear her attention away from Max. He’s stoic, but she sees the sorrow in his eyes. It feels like he can’t look away from her either.

“Guess we have to wait a little bit longer for that road trip,” she whispers, the words hoarse and stricken around the knot in her throat.

He nods, his mouth tight in that way she knows signals that he’s trying to keep his emotions inside. He’s trying to be strong for her sake. “When I get back. We’ll go to the ocean then,” he promises.

The console hums behind them, a warning that its fuel will soon run out. And yet Liz can’t bear to let go of the moment. Of Max. Not yet.

“Do you think there are oceans on Oasis?” she asks, as if her words will slow time and keep Max here with her. “If you’ll get to see those.”

“I guess I’ll find out,” he whispers, and there’s no enthusiasm to it. She understands why. He’s not going to Oasis to explore, to discover what the planet has to offer, the way she would. He can’t do that without her by his side, because he has to come back to her as soon as he can. If Liz was there, they could take their time. They could stand on the shoreline and marvel at pink or yellow or silver water.

Her breath hitches. She’s momentarily stunned by her own cluelessness. Why hadn’t she thought of this before? 

“I could come with you.” The words are out before she has chance to fully think them through. “I could find out with you.”

It’s as if a light has switched on behind his eyes, and his own response is breathless. “Are you sure?”

It doesn’t take a moment to think about it. Beyond that simple idea, the simple resolution of still being able to be with Max, of not being separated by galaxies and light years – there’s all the discovery to be made. A new planet, uncharted by humans. Unvisited and unseen. With him.

“I’ve never been more sure of anything,” she says, then adds on, as if Max might need persuading. “I could help. I wouldn’t just be tagging along.”

But Max needs no persuading, his face splitting in a broad smile. “This could be our road trip,” he says, reaching out for her.

She reaches back without thinking, clasping hands. A moment ago they’d been saying their goodbyes, but now both their gazes turn to the portal. It doesn’t need any further discussion. Nothing has ever felt more right to her, except perhaps the moment she’d kissed Max for the first time.

“Ready?” she asks him anyway, taking her first step towards the portal. His mouth lifts in a giddy grin, and she wipes away the remnant of her tears with her free hand.

“Ready,” he agrees. There’s a beat, a silent rhythm between them, then they take that step together, crossing the threshold into another world.

See this is how you make a super quick tweak to the ending and make it happy, if you aren't a complete hack.

39 notes - Posted September 7, 2022

#2

Why is the concept of sick leave so difficult for this fandom to understand?

If you aren't capable of working, then your employer has to deal with that and figure out how to cope without you until you're well enough to return to work.

That is what they did with s4 of RNM for Tyler Blackburn. He has said as much. They were actually a good employer in giving him the time off he needed to get well.

What do people want? Him to be forced to film and exacerbate his injuries? I know sick leave on the whole is treated weirdly in the US but even actors get to take it.

The show had to write around Tyler's unexpected absence, at short notice. He has said as much. Why the fuck are you all treating it like it's some sort of mystery or conspiracy that his character is absent when he wasn't available to film?

47 notes - Posted August 16, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

The CW owes an apology to Jeanine Mason, because apparently giving her the lead role in Roswell New Mexico was just catfishing us all so they could make yet another show focus on white men.

61 notes - Posted September 6, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[regallibellbright]

Under the cut, the edited version of my Round 1 essay that's in the round 2 spreadsheet! Not many differences but instead of Sota and Nao I brought up Prince because it's quicker to talk about his inner angst than the tremendous effect Sota and Nao have on Neku.

So we KNOW Joshua’s sketchy as hell from the word go, is the thing. We look at this smug, abrasive, overly-familiar, deeply punchable kid who knows WAY TOO MUCH and has too many things that don’t add up about him, and we think “He’s gonna hurt us later.” He’s introduced forcing a team up with Neku before we even learn his name. He says he’s somehow been watching Neku – something a sharp-eyed player can catch, because he’s got a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it appearance at the beginning of the game when Neku meets his first Partner, Shiki. This should be impossible, because Neku is currently dead and playing in a weeklong Game on another layer of reality for the chance to come back to life. Even weirder, Neku can read people’s minds, but only the living. Somehow, he can read Joshua’s, too, and Joshua somehow saw what sure looks like the scene of Neku’s death. Something doesn’t add up here. And we quickly learn he’s also incredibly misanthropic, thinking it’s impossible to ever truly understand people “so we should just get rid of them.”

But the thing is, Neku was ALSO abrasive, misanthropic, and deeply punchable when we met him. The first words of the game are him shouting “Outta my face. You’re blocking my view!” and declaring that he doesn’t get people, never has, never will. Even the FONT for that manages to look aggressive. We hated this kid. But a week later, he’s started to change. He’s come to care for Shiki, so much that she’s the entry fee he has to give up to enter the Game again. He managed to know just what to say when she was dealing with self-doubts so bad she was on the verge of giving up. Neku looks at Joshua, who thinks so much like Neku, and starts to realize this isn’t who he wants to be anymore. Maybe he does want to try and get to know people, a little.

And then the game lets us get to know Joshua. He’s still smug, abrasive, suspicious, overly-familiar, misanthropic, and deeply punchable. But thanks to that week’s Game Master having his own agenda, they’ve been left on their own for a while this week. With nothing further to do, even though Joshua doesn’t want to do the game missions, he decides they’re going to help some random people with their issues for the hell of it. A local ramen shop is abandoned because someone opened up a new store nearby and has an influencer shilling it? Well, why don’t they see what they can do to attract new customers by giving him some inspiration? Some jerks are blocking their way to Udagawa because their microphone is missing and they want Neku and Joshua to solve it? Joshua gets surprisingly enthusiastic about playing detective, given how annoyed he usually is when his plans get delayed. He doesn’t want to do the mission and play in what is essentially a Beyblade tournament with pins, but he seems to know a lot about the kids’ TV show about said pin game, and we’ll later find out he spent a week playing it when he had other things to do. He goes into a detailed rave over the ramen shop owner’s special.

The game’s primed us to see that everyone, from supporting characters who only appear in a few scenes to our protagonist, is deeper than our first impression. We’ve seen Neku’s growth. We’ve seen an influencer hawking mediocre ramen reveal he has actual integrity and longs for the simple food of his childhood. Shiki had a deep well of insecurity under the bubbly, friendly front she was trying to put on - her entry fee was her entire appearance, because her self-image issues were so messy. Another player, eventually Neku’s third partner Beat, seems like a skater boy with more muscles than sense even when Neku partners with him, but he’s been drowning in guilt for his sister’s death and subsequent erasure - and has been keeping that in from the start, along with his insecurities from parental expectations he could never live up to. We the players are prime to assume, then, that Joshua’s not as sketchy as we thought, maybe. And despite himself, even as he’s wondering what Joshua knows, Neku still kind of likes this smug, misanthropic asshat. So do we. We want him to be trustworthy.

The game’s mentor figure, Sanae Hanekoma, explains a little more, because he apparently knows Joshua. We learn that he’s been able to see the layer of reality where the game is played even as a living person, which could explain how he knows so many things he shouldn’t. But it could also explain why he remembers Neku’s death – Joshua has apparently decided he belongs here, not in the world of the living, and wants to become the Composer, who runs the entire purgatorial death Game. (When he talks about what things were like there, he says normal life “felt like death” and that he’s here because he wants to be. They don’t go so far as to say outright he was suicidal, but it’s obviously heavily implied even WITH the knowledge of a secret purgatorial death game, and it’s an easy read that he still is during the game itself.) He admits he picked Neku because he saw how strong he was, who’s to say he didn’t kill Neku in the first place to GET a strong Partner? Especially when Neku reads his mind again and sees how Joshua got to that point - he ran into Neku holding a gun, and then Neku hears a gun go off and Joshua’s gun is smoking. Neku eventually confronts him about the fact that Joshua seems to have killed him, after Joshua reveals he has mysteriously strong powers - which he claims are because he snuck into the game and is actually alive. Joshua’s response to this accusation?

“Aww, Neku. You said you didn’t remember! You sneaky little thing. So what if I did?… What if I am the one who killed you? You’re going to do something about it?”

Neku can’t. He can’t get a new Partner - even if he tried, by this point in the game everyone else seems to have been killed by super-powerful monsters - and without one he’s dead(er) and so is Shiki. So he struggles through the last few days thinking he’s working with his murderer, and stays icily hostile to the guy. Cue the last day of the game, where they fight the Game Master for the week and Neku suddenly gets another flash of memory. Joshua was there when he died, but so was the GM. And it looks like the GM shot first. And after they fight, he responds with a suicide attack, a massive flare that would take all three of them out. Neku thinks they’re doomed, before Joshua smiles and pushes him out of the way and takes the blast instead, apparently trying to make things right with Neku after all the suspicion.

This hits Neku HARD. Even though Joshua was annoying and abrasive, he didn’t deserve to die. And Neku regrets that his suspicions kept them from getting along, and made Joshua feel he had to sacrifice himself. Worse, because Joshua was in the Game illegally, Neku has to play a third time, with the people running the Game actively trying to screw Neku over – he only manages through a loophole. With the game increasingly messed up, and the entire city falling under some kind of creepy mind control, he and Beat decide that the only thing for it is to replace the Composer and put Beat in charge. They conclude that it was probably Mr. Hanekoma, who’s been revealed as not just a mentor figure but Neku’s idol, and who was also responsible for saving Beat back when his sister and partner got erased. We’re coping with that apparent betrayal and fight the Composer’s second-in-command, who seems increasingly agitated, when Joshua appears, talks to the guy like he knows him, and is promptly trapped by the guy in a last-ditch final boss fight before Neku or the players have time to ask what the hell is going on. But hey, we got attached to that little shit, too. We’re happy Joshua’s alive, even if we’re incredibly confused at the moment. Neku wins. And we learn everything.

The second-in-command was responsible for the brainwashing, but had a reason for it: This was his last-ditch attempt to save the city from destruction by the Composer, and the whole thing was a game between them.

Since he lost, said second-in-command will be erased from existence same as any other game loser.

The Composer wasn’t supposed to interfere directly, but to watch from the sidelines over a Player he’d chosen for this purpose. That Player was of course Neku.

And who’s the Composer? Joshua freezes Beat and the now-returned Shiki and giggles as he says it was him all along, and Neku was his pawn for this whole “destroy the city” plan. He couldn’t have won without Neku! Good job.

Oh, by the way. He never said he DIDN’T kill Neku, now did he? Here’s the rest of his memory. The Game Master was aiming for him, not Neku, and trying to take his job. But Joshua took care of that by freezing the bullets in midair and promptly shot Neku. Hee hee. (And yes, he really does GIGGLE after that revelation.)

The players are reeling. The final boss was just defeated, but the entire critical context of the plot is only revealed in a twenty minute cutscene AFTERWARDS. We were expecting it to be betrayal by mentor when we had the rug pulled out from under us YET AGAIN. (He’s got his own secrets, too.) Neku’s reeling, too. There are so many revelations in such a short time frame. And we’re ALL feeling betrayed. That sketchy first impression was right! And if anything, the situation’s EVEN WORSE than we thought when it was just murder.

But Joshua is willing to let this come down to one last game. Winner gets to be the Composer. Neku knows the stakes - If Joshua wins, he’s “already decided” what he’ll do. So here’s a gun. Joshua will count down to ten. And on zero, they shoot. He’s already taken Neku’s entry fee. He’s given Neku every reason to do it. He counts down. Neku cries and raises his gun, while Joshua’s stays trained on Neku’s the whole time.

And then Neku drops his gun. Joshua shoots anyway. The last thing Neku sees are Joshua and Hanekoma smiling down at him.

And then he wakes up in the street again, with no idea what the hell just happened. He turns to the sky and screams “What the HELL?!” and we all feel that with him.

We’ve been preparing a betrayal from the start, but the reality is SO MUCH MORE CONFUSING and hurts SO MUCH MORE.

Iconic Homoerotic Betrayal: Revival Match

Polls Directory

[northern-passage]

The Northern Passage has been updated!

An old memory comes to the surface, and the hunter has a revelation.

Update 11/19:

This is probably the biggest update the game has had so far besides the initial prologue release - there is a lot of variation in these last few scenes of Chapter One, and we will finally get some answers... and probably more questions.

No new content warnings... however, we are getting back into the horror element a bit, so if needed I recommend checking over the warnings again as a reminder.

New total word count: 378, 696

Play it here!

Notes under the cut.

As well as the end of Chapter One (finally!!!!), there have been quite a lot of edits made throughout the game. There are minor narrative fixes and just overall a lot of polishing in the prologue and the Blackwater branches. I’ve added a few more options in character customization regarding the hunter’s chest as well, which will hopefully be an improvement to what was there before.

Because of these changes I highly, highly recommend playing over from the beginning. The saves will be broken, anyways, and I had to add new variables which will mean even if you do load from a save, scenes aren’t going to trigger correctly.

Also, this will be the final update in choicescript. For that reason, the coding at the end is pretty light, and the stats screen will not be accurate. I’ve done the bare minimum to ensure each player will still get the right scenes, but otherwise I didn’t bother. After this, we’ll be moving to twine.

As always, thank you all for your support with this game. I can’t believe we’ve finally reached the end of the first chapter. When I started this, I had no idea how long this was going to take me, and no real expectation or timeline for myself, but I definitely never thought it would take me this long just on chapter one. I also never thought this many people would even read my silly little story and that people would still be around over a year later so... thank you, truly, it means a lot. ❤️

[shijiujun]

山河令 | Word of Honor - Mega Masterpost

Hey guys, here’s a FULL masterpost of the following for all Shan He Ling | Word of Honor items, basically a where-to-find-what:

General - Where to Find What

Episodes - Where to Watch What

Merchandise - Stores to Look Out For

GJ & ZZH - Variety Shows, Magazines & Endorsements

♣ Updates as of 19 May 2021, updates for the GJ/ZZH sections will stop hahaha this is THE END ;-; of SHL-related promotions for em. Will only add on if more SHL merch or BTS footage comes up! ♣

(1) Novel ➩ JJWXC | Translations (Full) | No New Edition Print (For Now) - Because the first edition was printed a few years ago, the novel is 11 years old haha

(2) Drama Rec ➩ Here (I did this on the first day it aired so it’s based on the first four eps so yeah some info like where to watch is not updated but ignore that) (3) Audio Drama ➩ Here (Seasons 1 & 2, with 2 recently released)

(4) 山河令 Manhua ➩ Here (Up for two weeks and then taken down for some reason)

(5) Official Accounts to Follow ➩ 山河令 Weibo | Youku Official Twitter

(6) Wrap-Up for SHL Filming ➩ Here 

(1) Official Episodes (36 + 1 Special Ep)

➩ 山河令 on Youku (Original Simplified Chinese) - *How to Pay on Youku

➩ Word of Honor on Youku (Subtitles) - *How to Pay on Youku

➩ Word of Honor on Youku YouTube (Subtitles)

➩ 山河令 on Line TV TW (Traditional Chinese)

➩ Word of Honor on Viki (Subtitles)

➩ Word of Honor on Amazon Prime 

➩ Word of Honor on Netflix 

(2) Behind the Scenes ➩ 山河令江湖番外篇 on Youku - Partially (70%~) behind a paywall, each episode costs about 1 yuan (or if you’re in Singapore $1.50 SGD which is fucking expensive, in Indonesia it’s apparently $0.30 and in Malaysia $0.20 LMAO) - But you get about 4-8 minute long BTS cuts with original scenes released with original voices + green screens

➩ Word of Honor on Youku YouTube (Subtitles) - Definitely not full release of BTS and even if they did release everything, it’d take a while, but there are already some subbed ones on the channel, just have to do a search

(3) Noteworthy Extras

➩ Special Ep (Youku): 7 minutes long with the first 4 minutes an FMV and the actual alternate or extended ending (depending on how you see it) in the last 3 minutes - You have to pay for it on Youku (both on the CN and EN/multi-language versions), we’ll have to check this week if YouTube will have it available for free. 

In any case it’s a happy ending I suppose, do all of you know it’s a happy ending? I’m seeing people reblogging my posts with so much angst in the tags about how the ending is devastating (which I suppose it is by my interpretation anyway for Ep 36 but Ep 37′s healing properties have been spread far and wide)

➩ Ep 6 (YouTube)

➩ Ep 7 (Youku, BTS)

➩ Ep 12 (YouTube - BTS in Youku, Original Voices in Youku)

➩ Ep 17 (LINE TV TW & YouTube)

➩ Ep 20-21 (YouTube)

➩ Ep 27 (Youku) - Part 1 | Part 2

➩ Ep 35 (Youku)

➩ Official Interview with Cast

(4) 山河令 Concert - May 3 & 4 2021

➩ Livestream on Youku - *How to Pay on Youku

➩ Livestream on Youku YouTube - For international fans, think this is a cheaper option overall hahahaha

➩ Concert Trailer - Highlight 1 | Highlight 2 (I AM LOSING MY MIND)

➩➩➩ Footage now available subbed on Youku YouTube and unsubbed on Youku

➩ SHL Concert Merch - RWB Hair Accessories

(5) 山河令 Official OST

➩ Spotify

➩ YouTube Playlist

Official Stores for SHL Merch

➩ 歪瓜出品 - First store to come up with SHL merch, has shikishi boards, standees, keychains, cushions, fan, badges, puzzles and ZZS’ hairtie most recently. Also officially bought the rights to two popular WenZhou fanarts for merch, the other stores don’t have the same design. Ran by Boss Hu, a young dude who’s hilarious af on Weibo and has been trying to get permission to produce more merch and also struggling real hard to get us WKX outfit-inspired sweaters!

➩ Rua哇吧 - First to come up with WenZhou dolls. Currently they have a 10cm version and also a 20cm version. 

➩ Omodoki [Via Rua哇吧] - Hairpin, cushions, glazed armour keychain, enamel pins and other cute things like bookmarks too

➩ 阿里鱼 [Via 咕噜文化] - SHL OST. Enough said. PO is over so there is no link but once they produce it the listing might go up again.

➩ 娱影文创 - SHL-themed jewellery based on ZZS’ alcohol gourd and sword Bai Yi, or WKX’s fan, also has tote bags and the glazed armour

➩ 一直娱 - Another app, items cannot be bought directly from Taobao. They’ve got mugs, hair ties, scrunchies, mouse pads, coasters and a lot of cute other things that the other stores don’t have, including customizable phone covers etc. and best part is they sell WenZhou posters from scenes from the book. They’ve also got an official photobook, but IMO the one from 吾流文化 is more worth it.

➩ 啦啦酱JK - Wen Kexing outfit-inspired kimono outerwear, and also WenZhou inspired ties and ribbons

➩ 吾流文化 - SHL Photobook (the full version with costume, set and character designs etc.) and also matches another box set of items that include a fan and standee and some other things 

➩ 月心引力 MOONLY - Perfumes in liquid and solid form. They’ve also bought the rights to a set of WenZhou fanarts, and they’re making white-haired WKX for standees and freebies etc.

➩ 优酷模玩 x TOFU - CUTEST WENZHOU FIGURINES

➩ 地澈天清 - HANFU AND DRESSES!!!! Inspired by WenZhou I WEEEEEP they look real good and are also in the affordable range - A summary of what you’ll see

➩ CanCan x Youku - Cutest WenZhou fam items!!!! With WKX white-hair

➩ Prismland - New accessories!

(1) About ZZH/GJ

➩ ZZH Weibo | ZZH Studio Weibo | ZZH Instagram

➩ GJ Weibo | GJ Studio Weibo | GJ Instagram | Wuhu-Famous

➩ Ship Name: Lang Lang Ding (LLD) or JunZhe - Although there’s no really strong RPS to be honest, most people I know use JunZhe and LLD as a mix of platonic friends + the WenZhou drama ship, or use JunZhe just to shorten their names because they appear at a lot of shows/shoots/interviews together, faster to type as well. The word Lang Lang Ding comes from 浪 (lang) which means to wander, and then 钉 (ding) as in nails, the nails that ZZS inflicted on himself.

(2) Noteworthy Interviews

➩ Goodbyes to SHL - ZZH | GJ

➩ About their Characters (Youku)

➩ Interview with ELLE TW

(3) Fansites (Check out their Photobooks - Mostly for WenZhou and also individual events and they will add on the upcoming concert footage and shots as well)

➩ 越界 (Both)

➩ 起意 (Both)

➩ 怦然心动 (ZZH) *Special mention they’ve been around for the longest so far, about 3 years, way before SHL and they’re REALLY generous

➩ 春秋荒梦 (Both)

➩ 同谋 (Both)

➩ Percent511 (ZZH)

➩ 105度 (ZZH)

➩ Plenilune (GJ)

➩ From May (ZZH)

➩ 月下思凡 (ZZH)

➩ 初霁 (ZZH)

➩ 未央 (Both)

(4) Variety Shows (Since SHL aired - Mar 21 to Apr 21)

➩ Happy Camp (Youku or YouTube) - 3 April 2020 | 24 April 2020 (GJ only)

➩ Ace vs. Ace (Youku or YouTube)

➩ Ace Actress (Youku or YouTube) - Ep 1 | Ep 2

➩ CHUANG 2021 (WeTV) - Part 1 | Part 2

(5) Magazine Shoots (Since SHL aired - Mar 21 to Apr 21)

➩ 精彩!OK (Both)

➩ Madame Figaro 

➩ ELLE/ELLEMEN - ZZH/GJ

➩ SE 南都娱乐 - GJ

➩ CHIC - ZZH

➩ Wonderland - For ZZH’s Birthday

➩ Glitz - GJ

➩ VOGUE/VOGUEME - GJ (Not cover)/ZZH (cover)

(6) Endorsements (Since SHL aired - Feb 21 to Apr 21)

➩ Both

Tom Ford - 03 Lark and other shades

Armani Giorgio - Foundation

Wahaha Yogurt

➩ ZZH

Pandora - Jewellery

NIVEA - Sunscreen

Oneleaf - Skincare

Elizabeth Arden - Skincare

Sensodyne - Toothpaste

OPPO - Phone

Joyoung - Blender

Maybelline - Superstay Foundation, Loose Powder

Ariel - Laundry detergent XD

Baidu Maps - Don’t ask this is damn weird

Clinique - SKincare

Costa Coffee - Coffee mugs

Longines - Luxury watch 

水星家纺 - Bedsheets (He’s clearing the entire household)

Ahava - Hand cream

JBL - Earphones + Speakers

Killian - Perfume

Glico - Pretz

梦幻新诛仙 - Game

➩ GJ

KFC

Bearkoko - Dietary sweets

Wolong Nuts !!!

Sisley - Skincare

Vita - Drinks brand

Centrum - Supplements

Fresh - Skincare

Tangle Teezer China - Haircare

Loreal - Sunscreen

TT语音 - Some gaming social network thing

Revelation - E-gaming

Beast - Candles, aromatherapy

Ya-Man - Men’s skincare

ROEWE - Car brand

Braun - Shavers

Plant Selected - Oat Milk

YSL - Rose perfume

Tiffany & Co.

Louis Vuitton

Nescafe

[reds-ramblings]

A/N: I apologize for not updating sooner. This chapter was hell to write and the last couple of months have been insanely busy. If I'm being completely honest I finished this chapter about 2 weeks ago but I've been over thinking, rearranging scenes and making adjustments since. I was a little out of my comfort zone with writing parts of this chapter so I hope you don't hate it too much. The good news is the next chapter is already written I just have to do a final read through/edit.

Trigger warnings: I can't think of anything but I'm sure there's probably something I'm forgetting.

Hope in Tragedy - Part 23

MC's P.O.V.

I finally convinced Chase and Jake not to testify against each other and have a joint trial. I didn't want them both to end up in jail for perjury on top of their current charges. I like that we only have to convince one jury of their innocence instead of two. However, I don't like the all-or-nothing aspect of it. Either they're found guilty, and I lose both of them, or they're both acquitted. The trial is set to start tomorrow, and the lawyers have been prepping them. They've spent several days going over possible questions the prosecution may ask. It took a while but Chase has finally started to take this seriously instead of being a smartass or giving sarcastic answers. Hannah and Lily aren't leaving until after the trial and although I love them to death I'm dying to spend some time alone with Jake. That's another thing I hate about all of this even if they get a not guilty verdict I could still lose him. Jake comes into the living room and sits on the couch beside me.

"Hannah and Lily are going shopping so we’ll have the day to ourselves. I say we order take out and just spend the day here.” He suggests.

“Chinese?” We both say at the same time and laugh.

Jake had no way of knowing Chinese was my favorite so when he mentioned wanting to take me to the Chinese restaurant across from his hotel I was excited. We’ve had many Chinese dates since he’s been here but this is the first one where I know it's him. That makes this time special but it also makes me sick to my stomach to think this could be our last one.

“I’ll order all of our favorites and have them delivered.” He says as he leans over to kiss me. He then pulls out his phone and starts ordering.

"We're going shopping!" Hannah exclaims in a sing-songy voice as she strolls into the living room with Lily close behind her.

"We'll be out late so don't wait up," Lily adds as they continue to walk out the door without even stopping.

"Goodbye to you too," I say as the door closes behind them.

"You know," I say causing Jake to look up from his phone at me. "I love those two but I'm looking forward to them going back to Duskwood."

"You'll miss them when they're gone." He says while wrapping his arm around me and pulling me closer to him.

"Yeah probably but right now I miss the peace and quiet and having time to myself without someone constantly being here." I let out a sigh.

"Hmm, would you like me to leave so you can have a moment to yourself?" He laughs.

"No, you should just move in." I blurt out without even thinking.

"MC, I'm not sure that is a wise decision."

"I'm not saying right this moment although you have been here several days so it feels like you already have." I joke.

"We don't know what is going to happen or if this will ever be behind us. I don't want you to get your hopes up for something that may not even be possible."

I open my mouth to say something but before I can there's a knock at the door.

"That must be the food," Jake says and jumps up to go to the door. After a few minutes, he comes back with a bag and starts taking the containers out and placing them on the table.

We both grab our chopsticks and begin eating in silence. He picks up the TV remote and begins flipping through the channels before stopping on some random channel that I'm positive neither of us is paying attention to.

After I finish eating I put my food container on the table and turn towards Jake pulling one leg up on the couch between us and leaning back against the arm of the couch. I stare at him trying to take in everything about this moment. He sets his food down, turns to me, and frowns.

"Don't look at me like that."

"Like what?" I ask.

"Like this is our last night together."

"First you don't want me to get my hopes up and now you don't want me to think the worst? I swear you are so indecisive. Do you even know what you want?" I tease.

"I know exactly what I want." He says with a smirk.

"Oh, really and what would that be?"

He leans in closer until his lips are just inches from mine. "You." He says before gently placing his lips on mine.

I wrap my arm around his neck pulling him closer. I part my lips allowing his tongue to slip in between them. Without breaking the kiss he gently pushes me back on the couch. He slips his hands under my shirt and begins trailing them up my sides. My phone laying on the coffee table starts to ring but I ignore it. I grab Jake's shirt and begin to slide it up pulling away from him just long enough to pull it over his head before his lips find mine again. The phone stops ringing and Jake grabs my shirt doing the same thing with it. As he reaches for the clasp of my bra my phone starts ringing again. I push Jake away and grab my phone as I try to catch my breath. I see Chase's name on the screen and groan.

"What do you want?!" I yell into the phone causing Jake to laugh.

"I wanted to let you know Lily and Hannah are staying here tonight."

"Ok and?" I ask annoyed.

"Well, I just figured you would want to know if they weren't coming back tonight." He pauses then lets out a laugh. "Oh did I interrupt something?"

Jake grabs the phone out of my hand and puts it to his ear. "Goodbye, Chase."

He tossed it back onto the table before grabbing me up off the couch and carrying me to the bedroom. He tosses me on my back onto the bed before climbing on himself to finish what we started.

***

I wake up and look over at Jake and notice him staring at me.

"Why are you staring at me?"

"I'm just trying to figure out how I got so damn lucky."

"Oh shut up," I say while swatting at him. He grabs my hand and kisses it.

"Unfortunately we do have to get up. We have a big day ahead of us." He says.

I get out of bed and grab an outfit suitable for court consisting of black dress pants and a baby blue shirt. I grab my makeup bag off the dresser. "You shower and get ready in here I'm going to use the shower down the hall."

"How about we save water and shower together?" He says with a wink.

"No, because then I won't want to leave and we will be late."

After a nice hot shower and a relatively silent drive, Jake and I arrive at the courthouse. He goes to meet Chase and their lawyers. I walk into the courtroom and choose my seat carefully so that I am sitting behind them. After a few minutes, a familiar face appears at the doors at the back of the room. Agent Morgan walks in and takes a seat beside me.

"I'm pleasantly surprised to see you here." He says with an amused tone.

"Were you that certain I would still be in jail?" I ask.

"No,  I knew you were innocent, and I knew you'd be able to convince everyone of that. I just know how angry you were at them for lying to you. I hope this means you guys have patched things up."

I nod to him. "Yeah, they only did it to protect me, so I couldn't stay mad forever. Chase is the only family I have left and I can't just turn my back on him." I pause for a moment. "I fell in love with Jake, I mean Tristan, before I even knew anything about him. At one point I thought he was behind Hannah's kidnapping and I didn't even care I still wanted to be with him. It might sound crazy but I don't think there's anything he could do that would keep me from being right here by his side."

"I know I may seem like the enemy right now but I am on his side and I do want things to work out with you two. I'm going to do everything I can to make sure you get to stay together."

I thank him and he pats me on the back before getting up and moving to another seat across the room.

Hannah and Lily make their way into the courtroom and sit down beside me. The ADA, Mark Richards, walks in and sits down followed by the two defense attorneys along with Jake and Chase. The jury is led in and then the bailiff calls out for us all to rise. As we stand Hannah grabs my hand and squeezes it and we watch as the judge makes his way to the front and just like that court is in session. After opening arguments, one by one Chase, Jared, and Jake take the stand and recount the hell we've all gone through the last few months. I even learn a few things I didn't know but I promised I wouldn't be upset about anything said here today.

To my surprise, everything went pretty quickly. There were a few objections along the way on both sides but the questions and answers were short and simple. We all know they are guilty but we are hoping for jury nullification which is where the jury decides to find the defendant not guilty either because they don't agree with the law or they believe the punishment is too harsh for the circumstances of the crime.

Just as I'm expecting everything to wrap up the prosecutor stands up.

"Your honor we would like to call our last witness MC to the stand."

I gasp as he says my name. Jake and Chase turned to look at me with shock evident on their faces as well.

"Your honor we were not made aware of this and I would like to object to this witness." Mrs. Hines stands up and says.

"Your honor we've heard countless times today that the defendants were acting out of concern for Ms. MC's safety. I think the jury needs to hear from her to determine just how much danger she was in."

"I'll allow it." The judge says causing me to panic.

"Then I would like to request a recess so that we can prepare for her to take the stand."

"We will have a 15-minute recess to prepare."

As we are dismissed I'm ushered out of the courtroom into another small room with just two defense lawyers Ashley Hines and Adam Greer. I've known Ashley for years and I trust her so I'm hoping she can give me some advice.

"Why are they calling me as a witness? Do they want me to tell everyone what happened?" I ask her.

"No, MC you know you can't do that. Him attacking you isn't admissible here."

"I could just say what happened. Sure it will get thrown out and the judge will ask the jury to disregard but it's not like they can unhear it."

"No that could cause a mistrial or be misinterpreted and backfire." Attorney Greer says.

"How can it be misinterpreted?"

"He's right MC. Remember when they thought you all conspired to kill Parker and make it look like an accident? What if the jury comes to the same conclusion?"

"Well, what can I do? What is he going to ask?"I ask trying to put on a brave face.

"I'm not sure exactly what questions he's going to ask but he's going to do it in a way that makes Chase and Tristan look bad so you have to be mindful of what you say. Don't give away too much info and don't mention the night you were attacked." Ashley tells me.

"I know what happened to me isn't admissible but there are ways to get around that. What if he opens the door for it? If he brings it up I can talk about it without it being thrown out and then you can ask follow-up questions."

"He's a cocky asshole and when people get cocky they tend to make mistakes. If he opens the door we'll walk through it but other than that keep your mouth shut and give simple yes or no answers."

Before I can respond someone comes in to tell us the recess is about to be over and we need to go back into the courtroom.

I walk up to the stand and give my oath, to tell the truth, and sit down. I'm trying to control my breathing so that it doesn't show how much I'm panicking.

"Ms. MC, can you tell us about the day you first met David Parker and what your interaction with him was like?" The DA asks.

"I was working at Chase's restaurant filling in for a waitress who called out sick. He sat down and immediately started asking questions about my life and my friends. He seemed to know a lot about me."

"At that time did you know anything about who he was or what he was accused of?"

"No," I say trying my best to do as Ashley said.

"How did you learn he was the one accused of killing Jake?"

"Jared told me."

"Just for the record, you're referring to Jared Riker the defendant Chase Austin's best friend correct?"

"Yes."

"After this conversation where you learned that he was the man accused of murdering your boyfriend did you fear for your life?"

I look over at Chase and Jake and I know if I answer the question it could hurt their chances with the jury.

"Answer the question." The judge says bringing me out of my panicked thoughts.

"I was terrified he started threatening-"

"At the time you found out who Mr. Parker was did you fear for your life." The DA asks interrupting me.

"No," I breathe out defeated.

"You mentioned Mr. Parker threatening you but you don't know that for sure do you?"

"What?" I ask unsure of where he's going with this.

"You received threatening texts is that correct?"

"Yes."

"What exactly did these texts say?"

"They told me I should have learned my lesson to stay out of other people's affairs. He told me he knew I knew where Jake was and he was going to get me to tell him."

"That doesn't sound very threatening to me. It sounded like he just wanted information. Did the person who sent these texts ever identify themselves as David Parker?"

"No."

"So you have no way of knowing who sent these messages and it was mere speculation that these messages were from him."

"Objection your honor! He's testifying not asking a question." Mr. Greer, Chase's attorney yells out.

"Ok," he waves his hand. "I'll withdraw that statement. Let's say these messages were from David Parker. Did you at this time know Jake was alive?"

"No."

"So if you didn't know Jake was alive then would a text asking for information about him really terrify you?"

"Objection!" This time it's Ashley who objects but before she can state her reasoning he withdraws the question.

"It was right after that conversation that Mr. Austin and Mr. Duval gained access to Mr. Parker's phone accessing all of his information including his personal conversations is that correct?"

"I'm not sure."

"After that conversation is when you learned what they had accessed his phone is that correct?"

"Yes, when David Parker followed me home."

"Did he follow you home? How can you be sure did he follow you all the way to your home?"

"No," I say in an irritated tone.

"So he just so happened to leave the restaurant at the same time you did and just happened to be going the same direction as you."

"He was following me!"

"Is that true or is that just what the defendants told you?"

"At the time David Parker's phone was accessed you had no reason to be fearful of him. In fact, you didn't even know the truth about Jake's death or why Parker was really there until a week later is that correct?."

"That's correct. I found out when he broke in-"

"Yes or No, MC. You didn't find out the real reason Parker was here until a week later. Is that correct?"

"Yes."

"No further questions your honor."

Ashley was right he is a cocky asshole and I don't even think he realizes he screwed up yet. I can tell by the look on Ashley's face she knows it though.

"Ms. MC, can you tell us about the night you found out the truth about Jake's death and how you learned the reason Parker had been harassing you?"

"Objection!" Richards says.

"May we approach?" Ashley asks and the judge nods. From where I'm seated I can hear everything they're saying.

"Your honor Mr. Richards opened the door by asking about when she found out. Therefore I believe the jury needs to know the details of that."

"She's right you brought it up and she has the right to cross-examine about that incident." The judge says and then turns to me. "You may answer the question."

"David Parker broke into my house and attacked me." The jury gasps. "He told me Jake was alive and he knew that I had been lying to him. He threatened my life if I didn't tell him. It was then that he showed me a picture of Tristan and I learned he and Jake were the same person. I managed to successfully defend myself but not before he attacked me causing me to have a black eye, concussion, bruised ribs, and stitches in my head."

"Chase and Tristan knew the whole time why he was there and what he would do to you if he found out you and Tristan were close is that correct?"

"Yes."

"So it would be safe to say even though you didn't know you were in danger, my clients who had more information on this situation did act accordingly. Is that correct?"

"Objection!"

"Withdrawn. I have no further questions you may step down MC."

After my testimony, the judge dismisses the court and we will only have to come back tomorrow for closing arguments. As we're all walking out of the courthouse Jake puts his arm around me.

"You did good today I'm proud of you." He says.

Let's hope it was good enough.

[osvaldrps-archived]

gif making for lazy ones / a tutorial by osvaldrps

there’re at least two types of lazy people: the first one would procrastinate till the end of an era and the second one would do every possible and impossible thing and invent the perpetual motion machine to do nothing later (or at least to shorten the time spent). if you’re the second type just like me, well, welcome to the club and let’s see what we can do to speed up the process making a few apps work for us.

* if your computer is old/slow, this might not work for you cause we’re gonna use some video rendering which depends on CPU and GPU speeds and RAM capacity. ** i use Windows 10 tho this should work for macOS too. *** i’m not explaining coloring here cause what’s the point, every footage is difference, but you can see how i usually color my gifs here.

so, you’ll need:

KMPlayer (or any program that lets you cut videos into clips and save them as .mp4 or .mov);

Adobe Premier Pro;

AfterCodecs plugin for Adobe Premier Pro + AfterCodecs Panel (links are in the source);

Adobe Photoshop.

part 1: clipping

launch KMPlayer and open your video. i have an episode of Elite on my laptop, so i’m using this one.

fast forward till the moment your fc shows up on screen and pause the video. press Alt+C or right click on the player and go to Capture > Video: Capture... and click on the File Crop tab. pick another saving folder if you want, change Format to mp4, check the box ‘Customize video and audio codecs (could cause errors)’ and change Audio to None.

hit the Start Time button. fast forward and press the End Time button when your fc leaves the screen. 

press Start. repeat as many times as you need, close the player when you’re done and go to the folder you saved the clips in.

now launch Adobe Premier Pro and create a new project. i keep an empty one (’clips’ on the screenshot) so i don’t have to make new ones every time i use the app. settings of a new project doesn’t matter, i just use defaults.

drop one of the clips from your folder to the timeline

right click on the violet line (it’s your clip) and pick Scene Edit Detection...

check the ‘Apply a cut at each detected cut point’ box and hit Analyze.

wait till it’s done, your video will get cut into smaller clips like this:

go through the clips using the blue bracket (or whatever it’s called) and delete all parts you don’t need by clicking on them and pressing delete button on your keyboard.

since we’re gonna use a trial version of AfterCodecs plugin, we’ll have to make sure each part is shorter than 500 frames. for that right click on video duration and choose Frames.

now you’ll see frames count when you hover over any clip:

for me, gifs with 140+ frames look too long so i cut into parts everything over this number. to do so, press C on your keyboard or click on the Razor Tool button

and just click on the clip where you want it to be cut into two parts.

when you’re done, press the Add Markers for All Video Tracks button on the AfterCodecs Panel:

(if you don’t see the Panel, make sure it’s checked in Window > Extensions)

when markers are added, go to File > Export > Media, or press Ctrl+M (for some reason this shortcut doesn’t work if AfterCodecs Panel is selected, so click on any over panel first and then use Ctrl+M).

change Format of Export Settings to AfterCodecs, uncheck the Export Audio box, and pick MP4 Format for AfterCodecs Settings (in the bottom). if you click on Output Name (blue one), you’ll be able to change saving folder (default is somewhere in \Documents\Adobe\Premiere Pro).

then click the Open AfterCodecs Settings button and check the Workflow - MultiRender box in the pop-up window. you can also change rendering quality there (default is 70%).

press OK and then Export. when it’s done, you’ll see all the clips in the output folder. you can now close the app.

part 2: sharpening and saving

this is pretty same as i’ve shown in my previous tutorial, but the action itself has a few changes (i’ll link the download in the source).

launch photoshop and drag all the videos into the app (tho i don’t recommend doing 10+ files at the same time if PS usually slows down your computer).

if playing my atn for the first time, expand the 268x150 one, scroll to the end of the list, double-click on Save and change the default psd saving folder cause the atn has my path in it which obviously doesn’t exist on your computer:

also if you’re using Adobe Photoshop CC or newer version, make sure your Image Interpolation is ‘Bicubic (best for smooth gradients)’ cause it’s the best for my sharpening (to open Preferences, press Ctrl+K or go to Edit > Preferences > General).

then you can play the action. it’ll ask you if you want to crop the picture, do it using vertical and horizontal scales on the upper menu and press Enter on your keyboard when you’re satisfied with the frame (if preview of your gif looks lq and pixelated, that’s fine, it’s just a preview).

if you don’t want the action to ask you to crop the picture, you can uncheck the ‘Transforn current layer’ step:

the action will autosave the file in the directory you’ve chosen above and will close the psd after that. now you can run the action for the next gif.  if you have 10+ gifs opened in your window, you can just run the second action (268x150 for 10 gifs), this one basically plays the first action 10 times in a row.

and... that’s it. all of the routine is done and you just now have to do the fun part - coloring.

hope this helps. happy gif making! 💙

[lacebird]

💜  HOW TO MAKE A GIF WITH PHOTOPEA 💜

Hey everyone! I recently got asked to do a tutorial on how I make my gifs. I know that many people (such as myself) don’t have access to Photoshop for various reasons but they’d like to get into gif making. When I started making gifs, I only had a free trial of Photoshop, but when that ran out, I had to find another way to make gifs. Enter Photopea! A free, web-based software that you can use anywhere and that works just like Photoshop! 

In this tutorial, I’ll teach you how to make a basic gif like the one I did above. I use a macbook air, but it should be doable on a regular pc too!

If you found this helpful, feel free to share it with your friends! The tutorial can be found under the cut below 💜

THINGS YOU’LL NEED

A browser (I switch between Safari and Chrome, more about this later)

A screencapping software (like MPlayer OSX Extended) or, alternatively, a presentation program like Keynote or Powerpoint.

A program to screenrecord or a program that let’s you download from YouTube 

Lots of patience bc gifs are annoying little shits <3

1. GETTING A VIDEO BY SCREENRECORDING

First things first, you need to have the clip you want make a gif out of. There are plenty of ways that you can get them. I’ve seen some gifmakers say that they torrent entire movies and gif from that. The way I do is I screenrecord the part I want to gif directly from where I’m watching the movie or show (like Disney+ or Netflix [or something like 123movies if you’re a pirate 🏴‍☠️)]). That way, I don’t have to download the entire movie and I have just the part that I want.  

To screenrecord, I use my macbook’s built-in program called Screenshot. 

Open the program by pressing ctrl + command + 5 on your keyboard and you get these funny little buttons.

Click on the button that says record entire screen. The program is now recording your screen. Play the scene and make sure you expand the video into full screen so you get a full resolution. When you’re done, click the stop button that is at the top right of your screen (next to the wifi and battery symbols.)

If you don’t have Mac, I suggest you look into how to screenrecord on your computer, as I don’t know how other operating systems work. Sorry!

1B. GETTING A VIDEO FROM YOUTUBE WITH CLIPGRAB

Another way you can get videos is from Youtube. I use a program called ClipGrab for this. Download and open the program. You’ll get this window

Simply paste the link and chose the highest quality, then click ‘grab this clip!’. Done!

2. SCREENCAPPING

After we’ve obtained the clip we wanted, we can do this two ways. The first way is to use the program MPlayer OSX Extended. Here’s a tutorial on how to set it up, make sure you do this if it’s your first time using the program. Make sure that you have a special screenshot folder!

Open MPlayer, then go to file > open and find the video of the scene you screenrecorded or downloaded. MPlayer will now play the video. Use the left and right keys (< and >) to go go backwards or forwards 1 minute, but try not to move around too much because the software crashes if you do. If that happens, just click the reopen button when the popup comes on, and reload the video again.

When you’ve gotten to the point you want in the video, press the command + shift + s buttons at the same time and the program will now take a screencap of every single frame until you stop. 

If everything goes smoothly, you should find all your frames in your screenshot folder that you’ve made before when setting up the program! 

2B. USING A PRESENTATION SOFTWARE TO MAKE A GIF

If you want to skip the screencapping part and you want to have a fully completed gif, you can do the second option. That’s what I used to do before I got MPlayer. In my experience, it’s a really fast way to make a gif, but the quality isn’t really good. 

Here’s a tutorial on how to turn a slide into a gif in Keynote.

Here’s a similar tutorial on how to make a gif on PowerPoint.

Basically, you make sure that the size of your presentation is the same as your video, and that you make sure to export one slide into a gif. Also make sure that you export in the highest quality!

3. LOADING THE FRAMES IN PHOTOPEA

Finally, we can start giffing! As I said at the start, Photopea can be used anywhere, but I switch between Safari and Chrome. The reason why is that if I upload the frames in Chrome, the frames will be out of order. In Safari, that doesn’t happen, but the downside is that once I start editing, Safari will reload the page because it takes up too much memory. 

So, first I go to photopea.com on Safari. I click New Project and put in the same dimensions as the screencaps (in my case, they are 1440x900 px). You’ll get an empty project. 

Then click file > open & place and select your screenshots. Wait until Photopea has loaded all the frames, then, at the speed of light, quickly click file > save as psd before Safari reloads! You’ll find it in your folder where all your downloads are.

Next, I open Chrome (I use the incognito window because I have adblock on my usual Chrome, the program won’t work as usual if you have it enabled) and I click Open From Computer, locate your saved .psd file that you saved from Safari. 

Now, you’ll see all the frames as individual layers. Select everything by clicking on the first layer, then golding the shift button and clicking on the last layer. Press command + G to group the frames into a folder. Here’s how everything should look after you’ve grouped the layers.

^^ See how Agnes approves! Agnes things you’re going a great job!

Now, it’s time to crop the gif and get rid of the black borders. Making sure that the folder is selected, click on the crop tool (or press C) and click on Fixed Size

W is Width and H is Height, write in your sizing here. Tumblr’s max width is 540, so I put the width as such. For the height, I use 405. Then you just drag the corners until you’ve selected the part that you want, like this

Press enter and the image will be sized down 540x405 px. 

Now, our gif looks like this after cropping!

Open the folder so you can see all the layers. Select all your layers and right click on them, then click rasterize. 

Then, go to layer > animation > make frames. You’ll now see that each layer begins with _a_ - this is crucial because this is how Photopea knows that the layers are part of a gif. If your layers don’t begin with _a_, then it will not play as a gif

If you instead already have a gif done, all you have to do instead is simply click open from computer when you first open Photopea and load your already finished gif and it’ll have the _a_ at the start of every layer. You won’t have to go through the steps of loading your frames into a new project to make your gif as it’s already done and in a folder :) Just start cropping once you load it

You can preview your work by going to file > export as > gif. Make sure to change the speed in the preview window until your gif plays the way you want it! I put my speed at 500%

4. SHARPENING

Hooray, we now have our gif! But to make it look a little nicer, it’s good to sharpen it. I always use Smart Sharpen when I sharpen my gifs, and many other gifmakers use that too. It’s really good :D

To sharpen your gif, again, make sure that all your layers are selected. Go to filter > sharpen > smart sharpen. I use two different settings for my gifs, it really depends on the gif.

Setting 1 (which is the default setting)

Setting 2 

 Again, it depends on the gif, play around until it looks good to you!

Here’s our gif after sharpening it 

I ended up deleting the last few layers as the gif got bigger than 10mb (that’s Tumblr’s file limit, it your file is bigger than 10mb, it won’t upload). I also added a gradient map and it made the file size smaller, more about that in the next segment!

5. COLORING

Here’s the fun part! Now we get to play around with the gif, making it brighter and look Extra Nice™!  Since this is a black and white scene, I make sure that the blacks and the whites really pop. 

Notice how in the original scene it’s not actually b&w, it has a slight sepia tint to it. I want to remove this, so I add a gradient map by clicking on the white square with a black circle (I want to point out that we’ll be clicking on this button a lot in this step)

and I change the blending mode to Saturation

Then I add a curves layer using these settings

Then a second curves layer

Brightness/contrast 

Then my favourite! Selective color! First layer, I deepen up the blacks

Then another selective color layer, this time the whites

Lastly the neutrals

Here we have the final results!

Wasn’t this a gas! I hope this helped you out, let me know if you want to know anything else about gifmaking, I’m happy to help! Also, sorry if I wasn’t very clear, I’m bad at explaining 🙈

MORE RESOURCES:

Here are some other tutorials that are really helpful in making gifs. These users use Photoshop, but you can still use their tips most of the time in Photopea too, you just need to play around and see what works for you!

Gifmaking for beginners by @chloezhao (this one saved my life)

Pale coloring tutorial by @itsphotoshop

Two-Toned Gif Background by @clubgif​

Text with white outline tutorial by @anya-chalotra​