#then the next day i called an ambulance anyway lol
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ok so im scrolling thru my photos n its just like--
july 25th, reading origins n me drawing the first draft of lynx😇✨
july 26th, hospital. iv in my arm.
#hospital#LMK WHAT TAGS TO USE IF THIS IS TRIGGERING PLS ):#anyway its amusing to me now that ik it was a. manic episode. and not heat stroke.#the vending machine pic is of me going on a half hour walk in 29 degree heat to the nearest pharmacy#to get fever medication. and fighting for my LIFE!!!!!!!!!!i couldnt even daydream i was focusing so much on surviving#then the next day i called an ambulance anyway lol#am i implying lynx sent me to the hospital?....yea a little. its funny.#goddddd those 3 hospital trips were HELL i had both my arms bandaged after it all cuz they kept fucking up the needle😭😭#i haaaaaate needles but had to endure......to live........
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i'm going to the dentist tomorrow and being really brave about it. extremely. because i need to get my wisdom teeth out very soon but i have to do a consultation first. i'm being brave. i promise. i'm brave...... :(
#wish me luck.....im actually going to cry#soooooo like i have a blood phobia which makes me really afraid to go to the doctor#also i didnt have insurance until i moved to japan LOL.#so there's a bunch of weird stuff and associations i have with going to get my Health Checked#we have mandatory yearly health checkups and in my town everyone signs up for a day/time and goes to a big gym#and you wait in line with all these doctors who test your hearing and pee and lungs etc#but also your blood#last year i had only lived in fukushima for two months or so#and i was really dreading the checkup but i was being brave because it's MANDATORY i have no choice#(also free yay)#but when they drew my blood i literally fainted in front of everyone#i didnt realize i was going to do that because i haven't in a really long time#even though i was crying while waiting my turn because i was so scared 😭😭😭😭#anyways it was actually so terrifying because people were saying things that i couldnt understand while i was basically on the ground#the doctor later told me my heart rate was so fast he thought i was going to have a heart attack and almost called an ambulance#but i was like no lol i just have a phobia. and he was like umm can you tell us next time?#my bad#anyways he told me to stay home for the rest of the day so i did#it also happened to be the day before the school festival#so when i came the next day everyone rushed up to me and was like ARE YOU OKAY#and i was confused like yeahhhh im fine i just got a little sick haha#but it turns out there was a rumor that i was carried away in an ambulance from fainting lmfao#like nah one of my coworkers just drove me back home lol#very long story just to say....#im going to faint again probably. even though it's just a consolation.#text
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i had a dream i had a beautiful loving friendship with gus fring to match the one where i was besties with mike. im so broken take me BACK!!!!!
#i could FIX him#alsooooo jesse was there i think he like. helped save gus at some point idk#i was like god damn best episode EVARRRR. heartbroken#i dont rlly remember the details i kinda slept like shit so im a bit scrambled#but ik we were fucking around w like.. game code? to make a pet shop?#so fucking random#we made a starfish and fucked up dog. there was a pool. a guy tried to kill gus. OH#he got shot and i had to stop him from bleeding out until the ambulance arrived#also he called. and cus they were super busy he was like ‘i can provide information aboyt felonies. also i have been shot in the chest’ LOL#wtf mike got shot in my dream abt him too. why thats so random#there was also a separate dream abt ummm. idk some sort of puzzle thing we had to do as a team…? saul was there. he set a fire as a scheme#but the fire ppl wouldnt come until he said there were ppl inside 😭#idk if i ever talked abt the mike dream here actually.#we were just friends…. besties… and he got SNIPED…….. and i tried to save him but he died#it was so sad the next day i was sad like all morning#feels similar now. miss u gus#^^^ EFFECTS OF ZERO FRIENDS#ummm anyway. more updates#i bought a meta quest like on impulse cus i saw they were cheaper now. the thing fucking sucks but vr is so awesome#ive been mostly playing beat saber cus my room is teeny tiny so i cant rlly safely turn#i started making my own map w a patricia taxxon song. SUPER fun i can see this becoming a new hobby#ive also been fucking around in vrchat a little. that shit is mindblowing#so immersive. its like unbelievable#ive only been playing that solo rn bc im shy and also testinb how well my laptop csn hsndle it LOL….#but its so awesome. i feel like a little kid#i had to get a better headstrap and face pad bc the stock pne is So bad. like i camt wear it for more thsn like 20 mins at a time#so maybe when that comes i will muster up the courage to go into public worlds#best world i have visted so far. udons bird sanctuary. i think irs called#U CAN FEED DUCKSSSSS. WAAAAGHHHH#one day i want to make my own avatar too. im feeling the inspiration
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ᡣ𐭩 。ꪆৎ ˚⋅PRINCESSBRUNETTES SCREAM SALON INTRODUCES … ໒꒰ྀི ˃̵ ࿁ ˂̵ ꒱ྀིა
BLINK TWICE ࣪𓏲ּ ᥫ᭡ ₊ ⊹ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃
♩cecile believe — blink twice ♩
pairing: supe!rafe x reader
cw: theboys!au, hostage situation, guns, rafe is 6ft7 because of compound v lol, forceful-ish sex, fear, death (not reader)
you are responsible for your own media consumption. welcome to kinktober day six. better late than never!
you’d only ever seen ‘king kook’ on tv.
six-foot-seven feet of pure lean muscle and compound v. you didn’t invest yourself too much into the capitalism porn and multi millionaire industry that were supes, not enough to admire the beloved favourite himself anyway. but you can safely say, once or twice it had crossed your mind. him. king kook.
many things had crossed your mind, but not one of them had been the fact one day you might be in the hostage situation you currently were — sky high in a penthouse that didn’t belong to you. you were just the maid for christs sake, caught up in a crime that you’d rather be far from.
as you listen to the repetitive drum that was your captors shoes, pacing back and forth in only the next room, your wrists tied, you lean back against the wall and stare up at the fluorescent lights in the walk in closet you were being temporarily stored in.
you’d already tried to plead for your life, bravely call out to your captor and ask to be spared — but had only had been slapped, the cold kiss of a pistol being pressed to your forehead shortly after forcing you quickly back into submission. all you could do now, was either wait to be killed or wait to be saved.
then of course there was the sound of the front door swinging open without a care that had you tensing up. the police wouldn’t just bust in like that without a plan, could it be another accomplice? you’re proven wrong once more by the sound of your captors voice once more — urgent and pleading, followed by a voice you hadn’t heard prior, and yet was somewhat familiar.
“alright alright, quit with the cryin’ okay— got yourself into this mess i don’t wanna hear it.”
there’s a strangled sound, the patio glass down sliding open, a yelp — and then silence. whoever had come to save you, had just thrown your captor from the balcony. you’re frozen, praying you weren’t next.
“you uh— you in here? ‘can come out now, okay he’s… he’s gone.” the male voice sounds reluctant, like he couldn’t be bothered to deal with the aftermath and you push yourself to your feet — bravely peeping from the closet.
there in the hallway, stands the famous supe— king kook, in all his glory. you knew he was huge but he seemed to tower now, the light from the open patio door casting an angelic glow around him— something like you’d never seen before.
your knees feel weak, all shaky like a baby deer and he presses his lips together.
“you’re…”
“want a picture or something?” he itches his jaw and you shake your head. in that moment, he takes you in — eyes dragging down and then back up as he blinks, waiting for a response. you suddenly feel nude under his gaze, and you wonder if that’s a superpower of his. you blame the stupid little black dress your boss forces you to wear.
“no. thank you. thank you for saving me.” you tremble, braving a step closer.
usually, he’d shrug it off — ruin the sweet moment with a ‘well it’s my job, so.’ and head off — but he’d had a long day and you were his final save until he had to head back to the tower for daily debriefs. didn’t hurt that you were easy on the eyes.
“yeah. he would have uh…” a grin spreads across his face and it feels cold, wrong for the moment. “he would have had your head on a stick.”
you feel queasy at the imagery but you’re distracted by the visage of the supe eyeing you once more. “do you drink?”
unsure as to how you got there, you stand at the kitchen counter with him now — still shaky. you figured with these things they’d come to have an ambulance check you over, make sure you’re okay, physically and mentally. but in this moment, there was no one coming. it was just you, and king kook.
you watch the muscles in his back contract as he faces away from you, unscrewing the cap to a bottle of expensive alcohol and pouring it into short glasses. when he faces you again, he’s charming — a coy smile leaving lines in his cheeks and focused eyes. it was never unheard of that he was handsome, you’re just noticing it now— close up and in person.
“get some of that in you, yeah?” he drawls, sliding the glass towards you, his fingers lingering on the rim— eyes on yours. “that shit should get you nice and relaxed.”
you take a sip, wincing at the sharp taste that burned your throat. whiskey — and you were never really a fan. but hey, it would be rude to decline. the supe chuckles at your reaction that you tried to hide, drinking his with ease.
“so what am i supposed to do now? do i need to report this to someone? i’ve never… been a hostage before.” your brow crinkles as your neck cranes to look up at him, the man suddenly closer than before, licking his lips like a malnourished alligator.
“uh, nah… no. you let me handle that, yeah? this was my save so… you report to me.” he tilts his head and you find yourself biting your lip. you want to scold yourself, but blame it on adrenaline instead.
“oh… well, i’m thankful for that.”
“yeah? how thankful.” he moves a little closer, and you feel tiny.
“hm?” all doe eyed and helpless, you practically feed it to him.
large hands find your hips, and to your surprise you’re spun to face away from him, the man leaning down so his hot breath invades the space between your neck and ear.
“you know i- i had a really long day. maybe we… figure something out, right? a way for you to pay me back.”
“how so?” you whimper.
it all happens so fast — one moment you’re being smooth talked, next moment your feet are dangling in the air, being used like a fleshlight. you’re grasping onto him now, flailing a little at the fact you were totally off the ground, the man effortlessly supporting your weight.
“fuckfuckfuck— yeah-haha, like that.” he strains, hips plapping violently against your ass as he fucks into you. no protection or anything, but somewhere in the back of your mind you figured supes couldn’t procreate like that.
“k—king m’gonna fall— gonna—mmph.” you sound deranged, like an animal even as you flop against him, letting him hammer you in the air.
“shh—shutup, a’ight? gonna — gonna let me have this… mmph… gonna be a grateful girl for me okay?” he grunts, adjusting his feet wider and closing his eyes to concentrate on the warm embrace of your snug cunt.
you suppose you were grateful, and whilst you were filled with shame — the least you could do would be to try and enjoy it.
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After a bad date leaves you with a twisted ankle, your quiet but protective roommate steps in to help.
✦ on this fic: simon 'ghost' riley x fem!reader, fluff, mentions of alcohol and a twisted ankle
✦ a/n: alright so this may or may be not based on my weekend lol i do love the roommate dynamics so if you guys have any suggestions or ideas for this au feel free to send me an ask! hope you enjoy the read 🖤
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
“Tell me how much it hurts,” he says, lightly pressing his fingers against your swollen skin.
You suck in a sharp breath, glancing down at him as he kneels in front of the couch, his fingers brushing over your ankle. He’s not being rough, you’re just in pretty bad shape right now.
“It hurts,” you say, keeping it simple, and he scoffs softly at the obvious answer. “I think it’s kinda swollen.”
“You think?” your roommate lets go of your foot, standing up and raising an eyebrow at you. “Remind me again how this happened, sweetheart.”
You blush. It’s Sunday morning, sunny, with a soft breeze coming in through the living room window. A perfect day for a walk, to get some fresh air — except you’re stuck on the couch with a twisted ankle, thanks to last night’s drinking that got a bit out of hand.
“I was out drinking with a date,” you mumble, feeling your cheeks heat up. “But I didn’t really eat much yesterday, so I guess I… overdid it. He was walking me home, and I tripped and twisted my ankle.”
“And what did he do?” Simon asks, sitting down next to you on the couch. You let out a soft noise as he gently grabs your legs, putting them on his lap. One hand rests on your knee, his thumb lazily drawing small circles on your skin.
“He wanted to call an ambulance, but I thought that was a bit much. So I just had him help me up, and we walked back. We weren’t far anyway.”
“You had to walk with a twisted ankle,” he said in that flat tone that made it obvious he was annoyed — not with you, but probably with your date. “Why didn’t he just carry you?”
“I don’t think he could… I’m too heavy,” you say, rolling your eyes.
“I can carry you just fine,” he grumbles. “What are you doing going out with guys who can’t even carry you?”
You don’t respond, just lean your head back against the couch and close your eyes. You can feel Simon’s hand still on your knee — his skin is rough but warm. He’d come home from whatever he’d been up to on Saturday night, only to find you passed out on the couch with a very obviously swollen and painful ankle.
Simon was a quiet, reserved roommate, and he wasn’t really around much, but that didn’t mean you two hadn’t built your own kind of intimacy over the last two years of living together. So, when he saw you were hurt, he took it upon himself to check things out. You’d told him it was just a twisted ankle and a moral hangover. Nothing too serious. But clearly, he didn’t think it was as "nothing" as you made it sound.
“I’m sure he’s never gonna want to see me again,” you mumble, eyes still closed. Simon’s thumb stops moving on your skin, a clear sign he heard you.
“Who?” he asks. You open your eyes to find him staring right at you, eyes serious and focused.
“My date.”
“Good,” Simon mutters. “He couldn’t even take care of you after you got hurt. Should’ve carried you upstairs, helped you clean up.”
“I can take care of myself just fine,” you say, a little defensive, which makes him chuckle.
“Yeah? Then why are you still stuck on this couch instead of upstairs getting a shower and some proper rest?” He smirks, and you just roll your eyes without answering.
“Where would you even be without me?” he sighs, standing up. You let out a small, surprised noise as he lifts you effortlessly into his arms, holding you close. You feel his chest rumble with a chuckle, the sudden move and how close he is making your heart race. “You’re lucky you’ve got me, princess.”
“Shut up,” you laugh, but you can’t help closing your eyes and letting out a small, relieved sigh.
Because yeah, you know you are.
#ada writes fanfiction#simon riley x you#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon riley x reader#cod x reader
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≻ ┄┄ ♡ ┄┄ ≺
carlisle cullen x m!werewolf! reader
warnings: male reader, werewolf reader, imprinting, twilight lore, omegaverse?, forbidden love, reader gets hit by a car lol, love confessions??, esme doesnt exist (still love her tho)
wc: 2.1k
cut for length!
you drove into town in your dad's truck, old and slow. your family hated going into town, and you never understood why, which is why you were on a sort of errands run for them. of course you knew of the cullens in all of their vampire-ness but you never found it as much of a problem, what were the chances you'd run into them anyways?
the laundry list of things to do was long, longer than you'd expected, so last minute you called your friend jess to help keep you company on your long day ahead of you. you picked her up from her cute but humble house and headed towards the first place on your list, newton's olympic outfitter's. "aren't you and one of the newton boys together? mike, right?" you asked as you looked at the list on the seat next to you while pulling out of jess' driveway. it'd been awhile since the last time you'd hung out even though you considered jess to be one of your closer friends, the reservation didn't get good enough phone reception to call as frequently as she wanted.
"uh, no, we broke up actually," she mumbled quickly from the passenger seat next to you. "oh, damn, sorry. what a bitch," you added the last part jokingly, trying to cheer up from the topic. you both laughed it off and continued the drive until you got there, continuing your conversation as you walked into the store. "i just need to get a few things for my sibling(s) and dad, shouldn't take too long," you assured her as you quickly found the first thing on your list. the day went mostly like this, stopping by random shops for the few odd items before the final store on the list, just getting a few groceries that are cheaper to buy in forks. you entered the store and followed the routine as normal, getting whatever you needed and getting out as soon as possible.
caught up in your conversation with jess, you hadn't even noticed the small red car speeding through the parking lot. everything happened so fast all you can remember is walking with jess, hearing her scream, and then being on the ground of the parking lot. "tyler! what the fuck is your problem!" jess yells, you only vaguely hear it before she rushes over to help you sit up. "at least call an ambulance asshole, don't just stand there with your door open!" you heard her yell again before she started to check on you.
before you knew it, you were being taken into an ambulance and rushed to the hospital. the hospital. a shiver runs down your spine and you hear the heart rate monitor pick up its beeping as you realized you're going to the one place in forks where you have been forbidden to go by your family.
you start panicking, trying to get out of the ambulance in any way you can.
"hey, calm down, we're going to put you under for the rest of the ride, okay? we can't help you if you don't let us," you hear the nurse in the back with you say after trying to get you to stop freaking out.
you woke again in a hospital bed, the smell of medicine invading your nostrils immediately and making you sneeze.
"ah, you're awake, and just in time. the doctor's on his way right now." the same female nurse says before finishing up on writing your vitals and waiting for the doctor. your heart drops when you hear her mention him, no doubt it was carlisle cullen. what if he killed you in the hospital, right there, he probably had manipulation powers to make everyone think nothing happened.
"i don't need a doctor, i'm fine, let me go," you rush out as fast as possible while trying to sit up, the action only making you dizzy as the nurse gently laid you back down.
"once the doctor says you're fine you can leave. you only have minimal bruising and a few cuts, you'll be out of here in the blink of an eye," the nurse comforted you, and it seemingly worked as the heart rate monitor went back to normal. you took deep breaths, only a few minutes with the monster and you'd be able to leave and never go into forks again.
you heard footsteps approaching and turned your head to the door, the door knob turned and your heart dropped again, fear pulsing in your veins more than it ever has before. then he stepped into the room and you were filled with a new feeling, your heart started beating faster, and it was like you had tunnel vision on him and him alone. you couldn't hear the busy sounds of the hospital, and you surely didn't notice the nurse standing too close for your liking anymore. the first thing your brain registered was that the doctor had the best smell you've ever encountered, like vanilla, honey, and lavender all at once.
"-use me, sir?" the nurse said, only hearing the last part of whatever she was saying. you adjusted back to reality quicker than you wanted, then you noticed the doctor standing in front you, trying to get your attention for an unknown amount of time.
"cullen," was all you managed to squeak out, staring with wide eyes at the man in front of you. he was better looking than anyone you'd ever seen, like god himself graced the doctor's face. he wasn't what you expected from the stories you've been told. you were told his eyes were empty and loveless, but as you looked at him his eyes were warm and more full of love than a father seeing his newborn baby for the first time.
"i see you're from the reservation, brave of you to come here," his voice was angelic, like he was singing a song only for your ears to hear. you gave him an alarmed look before you could stop yourself, was he threatening you? was your pack right?
"what?" you stuttered out and you were met with a soft, too soft to be real, chuckle and a warm smile from the doctor. "i don't see many of you in the hospital, i was starting to think you've all been avoiding it because of me,"
"they have," your words came before your brain could filter them, his frown was quick and the cutest frown you've ever seen, the kind of frown that made you want to hold him and kiss it away. "sorry, just something the tribe elders told us to do, it's not like any of us hate you," you stumbled over your words, and lied through your teeth. some of the members of your pack hated the cullens like they'd been personally attacked by them. the smile on his lips made your heart skip a beat, which was well documented from the heart monitor you nearly forgot about.
the doctor, carlisle you think, shone a light in your eyes, and then checked your ears, and listened to your heartbeat. his hand was on your chest, and you're sure he could hear the affect it had on you.
"well, good news, you can be released and you already talked to the police so there's no need for you to stay." you didn't think it was possible but your heart dropped again, you'd almost wished you got hurt worse so you could spend more time with him. "i'll finish this paperwork and get it on file as soon as possible, you should be able to leave within the hour. is there anything else you need?" you barely heard the rest of his sentence, still focusing on the fact that you wouldn't be able to stay around the doctor for longer.
"um, would it be possible to talk to you? in private?" you asked sheepishly. you were 110% sure you were imprinting on him, and you were even more sure he was definitely a vampire. you didn't hear any heartbeat, and you were quick to notice his larger than normal canine teeth. your question was met with another warm smile that made your heart restart and a nod.
"yes, of course, let me get you unhooked from the equipment and i'll walk you to my office, okay?" his voice was soft and reassuring, like he knew what you were going through. there was no way he knew that much about werewolves, right? just as he said, he helped you get the various wires off and led you to his office. his door read 'doctor carlisle cullen', you had remembered his name correctly. he opened the door and held it open for you, the gentleman you could only dream of. he closed the door gently but swiftly behind himself.
"please, take a seat. what were you wondering about?" he asked sweetly as he took his own seat and set a few papers before himself. you didn't plan to get this far, you hadn't figured out what you were going to say, so you just said what came to mind first, "i know you're a vampire," your words came out jumbled. he stared at you with a blank look, millions of thoughts racing through his head. you picked up on his reaction and rushed out the rest, "i'm not gonna expose you, everyone in the pack knows," hardly comforting, but better than him thinking you want to ruin his life. he let out a small noise of understanding, and that itself made your heart skip another beat.
"what is it you came here to tell me?" his voice was colder now, but still melodic like he planned his words for centuries.
"i'm sure you know about, you know, the whole werewolf thing," you paused as you spoke, looking at him to gather his reaction, and he nodded to signal you to continue speaking. "do you know anything about... imprinting?" you whispered the last word like it was poisonous.
"ah, you came to ask about that. i can try to help as much as i can, but wouldn't you prefer someone from your tribe to explain it to you?" carlisle's words were soft and understanding, with a hint of genuine curiosity.
"no, uhm, hold on i think i need a minute," you stuttered out, trying to figure out the least awkward way to explain you think he's your soulmate. you thought for a minute, carefully putting a sentence together before speaking again.
"doctor cullen," you started, "carlisle, i think i," your voice was caught in your throat, but you tried your best to finish you sentence. "i think i imprinted on you," you ripped off the band-aid and rushed it out. you stared at your shoes, though you'd rather be looking at carlisle's godly beautiful face. after a moment of silence you peeked a look at his face to gather if he was upset or not. you couldn't pinpoint the emotion on his face, shock? fear? anger? your heart started beating at an irregular pace again, "i-i'm so sorry, i'll go," you felt tears in your eyes and started to gather the small bag of belongings you were given before his voice stopped you.
"no, no, you're okay. i'm sorry, i didn't know that was possible," for once his words didn't seem as well thought out, it was jarring but his words flowed together as beautiful as always. "and you're sure?" he asked.
"yes, i think, i don't know. i haven't felt this way before, it's just like it was described to me. like you're the only person who actually matters anymore," you spoke freely, which surprised you.
"hm, well, i'm new to this too, we can figure it out together," carlisle's voice was warmer than ever, you felt like a blanket was being placed over you. you smiled and were going to stand up when he was suddenly standing right next to you, you jumped slightly and he let out a playful laugh, his laugh was beautiful, like angels singing in a choir. "apologies, forgot to warn you,"
you stood up and hugged yourself to him, his arms wrapped around you in the best hug you've ever had. he was cold, but you were sure you were warm enough for the both of you. you never wanted to separate from it, and let out a whine when he pulled away, surprising yourself more than you thought you could today.
"i'll tell the hospital something happened with one of the kids and we can talk about this more, if you're okay with it," you agreed quickly, the other patients could wait, how much trouble could happen in forks while you hog him for a little?
≻ ┄┄ ♡ ┄┄ ≺
#carlisle cullen x reader#carlisle cullen#carlisle cullen x male reader#male reader#carlisle cullen x you#twilight x you#fluff
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Prisoner #005
a/n: My original idea for this didn’t quite work out how I wanted but what’s new with this project. Anyway please enjoy some insane!Scaramouche because why not lol
Fandom: Genshin Impact Characters: Yandere!Prisoner!Scaramouche x GN!Reader Warnings: Yandere, Violence (Violence towards the reader, Scratching, Intimidation, Threads, Insults, Cornering and intruding on personal space, Mentioning of a hit-and-run, Mentioning of murder), Long Post
[Prison Project Introduction | Pinterest Moodboard]
You always tried to live your life in a way you wouldn't regret it.
That was, until the accident.
Whenever you closed your eyes, your brain forced back memories of it as if it was happening right that second. The feeling of a body colliding with the hood of your car. The shock and surprise that tensed every muscle in your body when a person suddenly jumped in view of your headlights. The sound of bones breaking against the metal and the way crimson blood smeared all over your windshield. Logically you knew back then what to do—call an ambulance, explain yourself to the police, and say it was an accident.
So why did you bail? Swerved your car around and drove home in a panic, the alcohol in your blood screaming at you like a drill sergeant to get a move on. That alone should have been enough regret to carry for the rest of your life, but one evil always followed another.
You had never heard of the Fatui before, something they quite appreciated as they didn't want their identity to be known. But when two people rang your doorbell the next day, intruding in your home and sitting you down for a 'talk', you knew it was over for you.
Now, you were wondering why you ever accepted their 'deal'. They blackmailed you—sure, threatening to go to the police about the car accident if you didn't do as they said. They took care of your car, destroying all that linked you to the accident, but you got caught doing their dirty work anyway. Now it wasn't just one person dead and one in regret. Now it were two dead, and your life was effectively ruined. You'd not see the light of day anymore outside prison walls until you were too old to do anything with your life. If that wasn't bad enough, you were sent to the shittiest prison in the country, so you'd never forget you belonged to the scum of the earth for your doings.
Part of you really wanted to get a grip on yourself and stop the tears from falling endlessly. But no one would have believed the pain you were in. After all, you weren't the two people you killed and the many more families you left behind to mourn them. Still, after all you've been through, you had always held on to the hope that things would get better. That somehow, your life would turn around, and you could at least continue to live out your regrets in peace.
Scaramouche's hand slammed into the cemented wall next to your head, and you flinched—hard. "Stop crying!" he spat in your face, his voice like a jackhammer to your eardrums with how close he was standing. You flinched, squeezing your eyes shut and biting down on your lip to restrain your sobs. That was when you realized things would never calm down as long as you lived. You'd never have the peace you were desperate to achieve.
"I can't stand people like you! Spineless, worthless vermin being so sorry about what they did out there!"
His words, as sarcastic and true as they were, felt like blades to your skin, cutting and stabbing away at your vulnerable heart. You tried so hard to hold back your emotions, your body shaking from the strain to keep your tears contained and the bitter, metallic taste on your tongue revealing you were drawing blood while biting down your fear.
Scaramouche was only a codename; you knew that much. He was from the same organization that forced you to do the unspeakable things, and perhaps out of pity, they convinced the guards to room you with him. At first, you had been glad to have someone who shared your experiences, but by now, you weren't sure if it wasn't a cruel joke. He, at least, couldn't be more displeased with you.
Drawing his hand back, he shook his head, running his fingers through his hair as he cursed the Fatui under his breath. "Man, couldn't they have sent anyone more competent for this job? What am I going to do with someone like you? You're as useful here as you were out there! You didn't even kill that guy."
What?
"He's not dead?" you whimpered, sobs cascading off your tongue when you opened your mouth. You didn't try to hold them back as you looked at your cellmate in surprise. No one had given you any information about your victims since your conviction.
"You didn't know?" Scaramouche asked, his expression as condescending as if you were a child he needed to explain this to. "They found him in time, and he made it. Woke up from the coma today. You're looking really pathetic now. Failed and busted, who even hires people like you?"
His words reached your ears, but it was as if he spoke through noise-canceling headphones. The tears brimming your eyelids finally spilled over as a sudden and chilling relief settled inside you. You had no idea what that person you were sent to kill had done to upset the Fatui, but regardless, you were just so glad he made it. Faintly aware of the change on Scaramouche's face as he watched you realize all of this, lost in your own thoughts, you put a hand over your mouth, sobbing into your palm as you slid down the wall at your back.
Knowing that this person would be okay, that you didn't kill them, made everything fate had in petto endurable. You could go through the bullying and violence awaiting you at this prison, knowing you didn't kill this guy, whoever he was.
"What. The. Fuck."
Unfortunately, the things that made you feel relieved and hopeful only upset Scaramouche more. He made one step forward before squatting down right in front of you, his eyes narrowing in anger as he studied your expression, catching on to the little spark of relief in your eyes. "You're happy, aren't you? Ain't it great that you didn't do your fucking job."
Knowing you were treading on dangerous territory, the despair you felt returned, but you were terrible at hiding your feelings even when fear crept up your body again. "I thought I killed him..." you mumbled, not sounding apologetic at all. Your shoulders sagged as the corners of your mouth jerked upwards, clearly showing how you felt. "I really did."
When you let out your breath, you finally mustered the strength to look into his eyes. Fury glazed his gaze, but for some reason, it was warring with another emotion. Strange as it may be, while Scaramouche studied your body, sagging in relief, hopefulness rejuvenating you, he looked more and more... confused.
When he raised his hand, you flinched but quickly regained your composure and closed your eyes. Whatever he was going to do, you probably deserved it. Even if it hurt and you'd regret not fighting against it later, you'd endure your punishment. That was the resolution you came to as you waited for the inevitable pain.
But it never came.
Instead, a thumb, cold and chapped, pressed to your cheekbone, swiping along the bone even when you scrunched up your face in confused preparation for a strike. "Then why do you still cry?" he asked you, his voice an exasperated breath of incomprehension.
Squeezing your eyelids together, you slowly, hesitantly opened one to look at him. His brows were furrowed, and a disgruntled expression was edged into his face. But a child-like curiosity flared up ever so often in his gaze as he studied you as if he could not understand why you felt this way. For a moment, he didn't look so scary anymore. Nothing did. And perhaps, that made you bold.
"Because I'm glad," you explained, reaching up to wipe your eyes, turning your head, so his finger slipped off your skin. "I'm really glad he didn't die. I didn't kill him. Isn't that great?"
When you looked up at Scaramouche, he was staring at his thumb, dampened by the tears he touched. You could see the gears turning in his head as if he had a hard time following your emotional response, and eventually, his glare returned, fixating on you.
"You're so fucking weird. You took a job and didn't finish it. What's so great about that?" he hissed, rising into a stand suddenly. Swinging his foot over you, and for a moment, you expected him to kick you. You closed your eyes, preparing for an impact that didn't come. You heard his steps rather than noticed him walking away, and now it was your turn to be confused by his actions as you watched his back disappear in the distance, the cell door being slammed shut as Scaramouche stalked away angrily, holding his thumb in front of him, separate from his other fingers as if it was offending him.
"Fucking useless... Can't do anything right," he muttered as he departed, looking severely annoyed but never looking back.
Leaving you behind all alone for the first and last time ever since you were brought to this personal hell of yours.
«──────── 🗡♡ ︎𓍝 ────────»
Peace never came.
Scaramouche made himself a bit rarer, sneering and cursing you out when he did acknowledge your presence. However, there were still enough other prisoners and guards to make your life hell. As much as you tried to avoid conflict, it was impossible to tiptoe around every angry person in this prison. Being the newbie didn't help. Things often escalated above the typical bullying that you tried to endure quietly. You could never catch your breath between incidents. Every day you woke up to a new challenge emerging for you. Strangely enough, though, you ended up fine every time, aside from the stress and fear permanently induced into you.
The reason for that? The very same cellmate that tried to avoid you like the plague.
You didn't realize it at first, but whenever a situation grew violent, he'd show up and put people into their place. You never saw someone break bones without weapons, but Scaramouche didn't seem to care that he wasn't as tall or bulky as others, bones breaking under his feet as he stomped down on every finger with glee after he brought the prisoners to their knees. He'd always turn around and bark at you, call you useless and pathetic, but saved you in the end regardless, no one coming near you after that.
Even when others began approaching you with seemingly good intentions, Scaramouche showed up. One person—another prisoner named Childe—seemed to take pleasure in interacting with you, asking you to hang out or do favors that you never got to accept or decline because Scaramouche would immediately show up and pick a fight while yelling at you to screw off now. It took a while to find out that Childe was also from the Fatui and the two of them had some shady business going on in which Childe tried to rope you in, given your connection to the organization. He swore it was just petty things like doing errands, but Scaramouche would undoubtedly shoo you away if he caught you two talking. Every. Single. Time.
Just like this, things could have been good. At least you weren't in constant pain or strung into things that would worsen your sentence. But despite having your cellmate looking out for you, you still felt lonely and scared every day. When someone wasn't activating your flight instinct or raised your blood pressure as they bullied and humiliated you, you usually withdrew yourself from prison life. You didn't fit in, and it was almost impossible to make acquaintances with Scaramouche watching over you like a hawk. No one wanted to get close to you except if they meant harm or loved your scaredy-cat attitude. Even time didn't make things better.
While you knew you deserved this punishment for what you did, it still took its toll on you. Your nights were spent crying while you muffled yourself in your pillow, hiding from your cellmate's fury. You had come to terms with not being suited for this place. Still, Scaramouche hated any sign of vulnerability as if you were trying to harm him with it on purpose.
Unfortunately, your relationship never got better, and the scowl on his face whenever he saw you never disappeared. If not for him, maybe your life could have been a bit easier, but at the same time, it was unfair to blame him when he was protecting you—willingly or not—almost every day.
However, his barely existing patience with you ended abruptly and violently when he caught you crying one evening, only just returning from god-knows-what. "Why are you still crying?!" he asked, sounding absolutely void of sympathy. Then again, why should he have compassion for you? He didn't even think of you as a person worth living.
"Sorry," you mumbled, apologizing for reasons you didn't need to apologize for. "It just happened! I- I can't stop it."
You felt like on your first day when he cornered you in your cell, all ways out blocked off by the menacingly approaching anger he radiated. When you were backed against the wall, you felt a sense of deja vu. But this time, there would be no news that could give you hope, and you were pretty sure that after all you had witnessed, this was the day Scaramouche would snap.
Just like you always did, you turned your head, readying yourself for impact, convinced that your luck had run out now that his anger was directed back at you. But instead of a slap or the sound of your bones breaking, two hands wrapped around your face, cradling your cheeks as they turned your head to face forward.
"Who hurt you this time?" he asked, and you slowly began shaking your head in his hold, unable to answer. More and more tears dripped from your closed eyes, sliding along his hands that warmed against your skin.
"Just... stop! Please!" you heard Scaramouche plead, and your eyes fluttered open, staring at him in disbelief. Pain was edged in his youthful expression, and you couldn't trust your ears to hear this right. You stared into his eyes, trying to find the usual anger and annoyance in them, feeling almost desperate to see them instead of this woeful look he gave you.
"I've been trying so hard to make you stop crying! I forced everyone to leave you alone! Why can't you stop crying finally?!"
His voice started out as a tremble, turning into agonized yelling accompanied by his fingers curling on top of your face, nails raking over your skin like a cat's claws. However, as much as you should have hurt from his nails, his touch was too gentle to harm you. Scaramouche breathed out heavily, his head falling forward, staring at the floor for a moment.
Somehow, he succeeded in making you stop crying. The confusion you felt about his behavior was enough to override the dark thoughts you'd been dealing with before, causing you to sob in the first place. You were still scared and traumatized after everything, but seeing Scaramouche vulnerable for the first time instead of yourself made you want to help him instead.
Raising your hands to his face, he caught your wrists first, hands wrapping around them in a bone-crushing grip that you didn't dare to struggle out from. When he looked up, there was so much desperation edged into every inch of his being, it was hard to look back at him. But you forced yourself, reminding yourself that you caused this.
"I tried to fix it. They roped you into this life, and I tried to fix the mess they made of you. So I made it right. Ever since you came here, I've been questioning everything! I was constantly punished for failing, but you come here and behave like it's okay to fail. And then you cry and cry and cry, no matter what I do to help you! I don't understand you! You're driving me nuts!"
Scaramouche's voice was so brittle he sounded close to tears himself. Somehow, it felt like you had changed something in him. As if your display of guilt and relief had chipped away on his years of doing this awful, dirty work that must have made him into the monster he was. But all you knew for sure was that, all this time, he had actually tried to help you—unthankful as you had been for his interferences. Now, it was your turn. You owed him that.
"I'm sorry..." you mumbled. "I won't do it again."
You meant it more broadly, not just as an 'I won't cry again'. It didn't seem to be the core of Scaramouche's problems. Instead, his unresolved doubts about his loyalty to the organization seemed to plague him after you showed him it was okay to feel differently. But if it helped him, you'd try to be a bit stronger.
His hands slid up higher until they were gripping your upper arms. All of a sudden, Scaramouche tensed up, his head shaking as you heard the hints of laughter escape, the volume increasing as did the pressure on your body, forcing you down to your knees.
"No..." he chuckled, and as you slid down, you caught his gaze, a mischievous shine having returned to them as a crooked grin crept over his lips. He looked neither as hurt as he had moments ago nor was he the same angry cellmate you came to know. The look in his eyes told a very different story. The story of someone that was beyond saving.
"No, you will do it again. You will cry, and I can't let you continue to drive me absolutely insane. So you will cry. Always. Forever."
His palms resting around your face again, he pulled at your head. You had to crane your neck to accommodate the strain as he brought your foreheads together, with him still standing above you. It hurt, your muscles tensing and trying to wiggle out of his grip, but it was unyielding.
"What?! But--”
You wanted to argue, tell him he was contradicting himself, but you could only gurgle as he pulled you upwards towards him, not high enough for you to stand up, so your weight dangled from your neck as gravity dragged you down.
"I thought you hated me crying! I thought you were trying to make it stop."
"Yes," he purred, delight spreading over his expression. "And we know it didn't work."
Fingers digging back into your skin, there was no gentleness like before. You squirmed, closing your eyes only to snap them back open when you felt his breath on your skin, the panic bringing tears to your eyes again as you felt trapped. Scaramouche looked surprised as he saw the wetness welling up again, then his grin widened, showing teeth as a delighted chuckle fell off his lips.
Any doubts about his intentions faded as you heard this, your struggle ceasing as you stared at him with a feeling akin to betrayal. For a moment, you believed him when he said he was trying to help. You believed that he, too, wasn't as rotten as everyone was trying to make him out to be. That deep down, he knew it was wrong and regretted his actions.
But not anymore.
"Why?" you whispered, slowly giving up on any fantasy you had that you'd ever have the peace you desired to repent for your wrongdoings.
"If you need a reason to cry anyway..."
His smile grew diabolically as he took great pleasure in seeing the color drain from your face, any hope or contentment you had felt disappearing into the unknown darkness your mind was thrown into. One only filled with despair. The only thing you knew was that you would never get the life you wanted, and yet... you pitied Scaramouche, who was just another victim of yours. One, you drove insane without even noticing.
"I will be the reason," he revealed, and your body went limp in his grasp.
#scaramouche#yandere scaramouche#scaramouche genshin#yandere!scaramouche#genshin#genshin impact#yandere genshin#yandere!genshin#yandere#yandere genshin impact#Prison Project#yandere!genshin impact#yandere imagines#yandere headcanons#yandere scenarios#yandere fanfiction#yandere writing#yandere stories#yandere oneshots#yandere oneshot#yandere drabble#yandere x reader#yandere x darling#Yandere TW
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Life update if anyone cares.
I only post this bc i was posting my depressing shit for months and a lot of people were reaching out in concern <3
cw sever depression, self harm, suicide, csa, SA, all the bad. but also lots of good <3
TLDR: Despite a god-awful semester, i got all a's and b's
Everyone thats been following me the last few months has seem my personal posts about how fucking awful things have been for me.
I've dealt with fact I can no longer deny that what happened to me was CSA, despite being on a milder side of things. That sparked an absolutely spiral. I didnt sleep for months which made things worse. School, I got an F on a midterm and i NEVER get F's on writing assignments.
Work had its complications and i quit and then rescinded that quit two days later. I was so constantly depressed in my dorm my roommate literally told me i needed to go to the basketball game with them bc i was sitting in a depression hovel none stop. I only went to services twice this whole time, one shabbat and once for Rosh Hoshannah.
I burned the ever living fuck out of my fingers, yall remember that one? lol.
In novemeber i had relapsed so severely on self harm i thought i had accidentally killed myself. I should've called 911. I thought I was bleeding out and/or going into shock. I then worked myself up more by going down pages of the internet about medical shook and people dying from it. that did not help my heart rate. I couldn't stand, I couldnt see straight for a while.
I could not afford an ambulance or a hospital stay as i am uninsured and only ork 25 hours a week. not a lot of money.
All this happened and I didn't miss work. This is not a brag, this is me not being able to makegood choices for myself.
Finally, thanksgiving break hit. Thank fucking god. I WANTED to use those 4 days of absolutely nothing to get to my TWO BIG RESEARCH PAPERS I HADNT STRTED YET but alas, I was SICK. I was so sick, in fact, and so hoped up on cough medicine for 3 days i was incomprehensible.
I was so physically ill, i couldnt even think about how mentally ill i was. I slept and slept and slept. And by the time sunday hit, I felt so recharged.
My failed midterm was so bad and so not me my professsor reached out to me. Im close with him (in a v appropriate way lol, hes a bruce springsteen fan too) and i felt comfortable telling him essentially that for a few months there things were severe, and I really should've gone in for a 72 hour hold multiple times and i was not safe. through a few lines of resources, I ended up back in therapy bc my school added a new therapist that is a woman (i stopped going last year bc i didnt like seeing a man)
I like my new therapist.
Anway, in about 2 weeks I wrote 2 12 page research papers, 2 book report papers, 1 science paper did 2 presentations, took 2 finals, wrote 2 more finals with essay questions, and at the end of it all, not only did I not fail any classes...
I GOT ALL A'S AND B'S! Which means my gpa is still high enough to renew my scholarship for my last year
I am so fucking proud of myself for accomplishing all this despite suffering so fucking badly. I havnt felt pain like that in years, just agony.
I had a down turn again over christmas bc my siblings were literally ass, upto and including making fun of me for not ating (i am multiple accounts of sexual trauma from several people, so im scared of dating), making fun of my eating, and my sister slapping me and my older brother hitting me. Was a bad time. But for right now, im in the place im staying for break (all january) im back at my old day care and they love me, and olive garden at this store has been going great
Im hoping next semester to be better, im hopful at least
Anyway, thank you so much to everyone who has supported my writing has supported me through these times. It makes me happy that i came her to share my silly little moon knight x reader series, not really intending on writing a whole lot, but next thing i know, i have friends and a lil community. so thank you <3
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Last night i was at a concert, went into the mosh pit nd my shoes decided to betray me so i slipped nd fell on my back and hit my head. As i tried to get up i wuickly realized ppl were still moahing around me and i started to get trampled on so i just got into the fetal position to minimize more injury, eventually after like 10 seconds or so someone picked me up and i was able to waddle out of the mosh pit holding my head in pain lol. A worker came to me immediately and asked if i was okay and i said i wasnt sure so he took me to the back and they checked me out and stuff to make sure i was okay, they offered to call an ambulance and i really did not want that lol they gave me ice let me sit there for like 15 minutes and then i left nd got more ice at the bar and continued to enjoy the concert. Honestly despite it all it was fun, i cant even b mad at the moshing experience bc it was rly fun and stuff. I AM upset that i got trampled and that no one helped me up fast, i had to curl up and hope i didnt get more hurt until someone noticed me, it was a bit scary when i look back. The adrenaline at first made me just laugh and be like man that was silly but now the next day with my head and neck hurting and .y body aching im like man im happy it wasnt worse lol
Anyways i think imma take a break from moshing lol, i went a lil too hard nd got got
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on a cheerier note, shoutout to céline’s double take at morgane’s outfit 😄😏 il lui en faut peu pour oublier ses problèmes avec le préfet… (while we’re at it, prayer circle she dumps fachoman sooner than later, c’est la saison des ruptures anyway 🕯️)
let’s also note it’s the outfit morgane shows up in at the date/debrief debacle. bourge coinços vibes much? 👀 loved how out of sync they were, adam was trying SO hard and morgane just couldn’t wrap her head around what was going on 😂😂 (meanwhile, ranir hovering around them, tu crois qu’il avait été briefé sur Le Date™ ? they weren’t seated at the usual table, iirc 🧐) ahh. the way they don’t fit together… delicious. without a case to fall back on they’re completely lost!!
Idk, I’m just a sucker for the contrast between the glimpses of vulnerability they let on and their general uselessness on the day-to-day. something about the miscommunications being trumped by a deep trust, yknow? 🥹 (and I kinda loved how they talked about ~décryptage. it has a blorbo débrief ring to it)
when morgane comes for adam’s help… gaaah. 🥲❣️ (the music had me think we’d get les démons 2.0, tbh) best interaction of the ep. and then she backs out because she doesn’t want to be a burden????? sign me up for that sweet sweet angst!!!! 😱 followed by "vous avez pleuré ?"--😭😭😭❤️💔 pfiou, my hearttt ⚰️ we need more of this healthy gut-wrenching stuff, don’t we? (ils nous doivent bien ça 🥲)
I can't wait to hear your thoughts on all of this, the good & the bad. thx for reading and bye til next time! 👋💖
Lololol, I love how Céline like... freezes whenever she sees a co-worker presenting unusually. Be it Adam without a beard or Morgane in fancy clothes, it never ceases to amuse me 😅 But yea, Céliane vibes all the way 🤗
Also let's not forget how Adam's eyes were falling out of their sockets when he saw Morgane climbing off the car (in his defense, she does look amazing in his clothes lol), so it's very likely that he really enjoyed that she came to the date in her "bourge coinços V2" outfit, this man probably has a kink and now I can't stop imagining the kind of roleplay they'd be into if they were a couple 🙈
The date was SO fun!!!! I've said this before, but a few months ago I had this idea of a disastrous date fic about them, and I just LOVE that the show went this way, it was just SO them, the out-of-sync-ness, le malaise absolu, "et sinon vous êtes allée au cinéma ?", "Ninja Warrior, c'est japonais ?", somebody puts them out of their misery already 😅😅😅, the fact that they only get their chemistry back as soon as they talk shop... Ranir awkwardly standing in front of the table after bringing the wine (btw, "Ranir, le Languedoc s'il te plaît", is it me or did they imply that Adam knows all of Ranir's wines list? This man takes ONE glass of wine at a housewarming and now he's a patented alcoholic I'm losing my mind here) was HILARIOUS, as was Morgane cheering with him out of despair 😆 Also I can't help thinking that Ranir has seen Adam bring all his dates here, he must bet with himself on how many times he'll see this one again, c'est sa télénovela à lui lol!
And I'm with you on the contrast between the deep connection they share, but also their absolute incompatibility regarding mundane things, that's the kind of stuff we want in this house!! 🥹🥹 The décryptage argument was a great moment too, especially when lit up with Morgane's bad faith (but also Adam's inability to call a date a date lol), ambulant disasters 😅
But also. I love SO MUCH that he tries again. He asked her out on a date, it was a complete mess and it would be easy to give up, but he doesn't. And he asks her out again because he believes in them while I turn into a puddle of goo 🫠🫠
Finally finally, Morgane knocking at Adam's door... 🥹🥹🥹🥹 Gah indeed! Bonus point for the implication that Adam listens to love songs while eating dinner alone 🤣 but the simple fact that she comes to him. And he lets her in without even protesting. And he SEES THAT SHE CRIED AND HE WON'T TAKE HER BULLSHIT ABOUT THE RAIN AND SHE'LL QUIETLY ADMIT IT AH BAH OUAIS EN FAIT IL PLEUT PAS -> we were THIS CLOSE to Morgane openly admitting to him that she cried and ugh, my heart 😭❤️
And then cue the case-solving where Adam BLATANTLY is only thinking about kissing Morgane, and they work her way (🥹) and end up in a post-orgasmic haze (it's been two episodes in a row where the final resolution sounds like they're having/just had sex, just saying) where he ASKS HER OUT AGAIN BE STILL MY BEATING HEART ⚰️⚰️
All of this was such a great scene altogether and I agree with you, we need more of this gut-wrenching angst of Morgane taking bad decisions not to be a burden and actually making things worse 😈 Something tells me 308 will deliver in that regard...😏
I honestly can't wish you a happy finale-watch for reasons that I've mentioned too many times already, but when the time comes I'll be happy to hear your thought if you have any. Stay strong, and see you on the other side anon 😘🫂
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List of interesting stuff from when I was in school because I felt like sharing
My middle elementary school gave me and other children asthma. It was a moldy dusty super old school that got closed down a few years ago. A local church bought the playground equipment and its so weird seeing it there.
My class played the telephone game and there was some mean kid that bullied me so I changed the message to "*so and so* is an idiot" and it was said out loud at the end and no one knew it was me that changed it to that.
I got bullied for having misophonia.
One day in kindergarten I brought a stuffed toy dragon to school. I was told I had to put it in my backpack in this weird long closet area thing where everyone else's was hung up. End of day. Got my backpack. Toy was gone. Teacher checked everyone else's backpacks. Not there. It was just vanished. Still no idea what happened to it.
For some reason in first grade I refused to do the morning warm-up work thing and instead drew creatures in my journal. Teacher took pictures of the pages and sent them to my grandma. I also headbutt other kids during carpet time because Spyro. That was also the year I was started on meds.
In music class it was around Halloween time and spooky music was played. There was this one that was like "there once was a woman all skin and bones wooooooooo". It scared me. The teacher made fun of me for it. I went to the art class next door and crafted a kangaroo bat out of construction paper.
For some reason I was just out early and waiting for the bell to ring to tell us to get to the buses. Principal was there. I had this bad fear of missing the bus ride home for some reason. The sight of the area being empty before bell rings looked the same as the sight of the area being empty after everyone got on the bus and so my brain was screaming at me that they were about to leave me so I ran to the buses early even though the principal told me to stop. Yeah anxiety problems started early.
Multiple basketballs got stuck in the rafters of the gym building.
I think I heard one time someone had to call an ambulance because some kid sat on a pencil wrong and was stabbed in the butt.
Convinced my teacher to have a field trip to my place because it was a cool farm.
Got ISS (in school suspension) at least twice because I scratched up bullies.
Fitness gram pacer test. This one girl keeps running long after everyone else has sat down. Eventually just stopped the timer.
Brought this bionicle toy to school. It was this cool big one I had built out of pieces of older bionicles. Had long neck wings and a tail. Should try to draw it from memory at some point. Anyways the day I brought it everyone was brought into the auditorium for an assembly. One of the things the principal talked about was the problem of kids bringing toys to school. It was in my backpack the whole time lol.
Science class had a garden we worked at. In particular I enjoyed digging with a particular tool. I said I wanted it. Learned hoe was also a slang term. The outside world is full of nasty freaks so I would sometimes over think every word I ever say because it might also be a nasty slang term I wasn't aware of.
Grew watermelon there. It was harvested too early. Me, with farm living experience, kept saying that was not ripe. It wasn't. In the teacher's defense though if we waited too long the raccoons would just get it.
My school did a lot of field trips. Went to sciport many times. Saw a film in the IMAX theater for the first time. It was about scary weather phenomenon. I was terrified. From then on skipped IMAX time and hung out with a teacher. One time around Christmas I helped hand out reindeer candy canes to the staff. Few times later I decided to try IMAX again. It was amazing. I loved it so much. Saw it two more times at that school. I'm still angry that the film we experienced first was one that scared me and made me miss out.
One day there was a nothing day close to the beginning of a break. Some kid brought in a movie to watch. DVDs were getting to be the norm I think, so it was kind of weird that he brought in a VHS. It was a recording of that movie Hop from a video camera at the theater. Teacher stopped it when she realized. We almost watched an illegally obtained movie.
In high school there was this chemistry teacher I didn't like. I had this habit of correcting teachers on things. Her worksheets spelled aluminum as aluminium. I told her about the spelling mistake. Later found out that's just how it was spelled in England. I have no idea why she used that spelling.
Something in that chemistry class I'm still upset about. We were doing this lab thing in groups. Were growing crystals on pipe cleaners. The directions included the word tare. I had no idea what that word meant. I don't recall whether we we taught briefly on that word or not previously. I asked her what it meant. She said to ask the others in my group. None of them knew it either. Didn't let me ask another group. So we had to skip that step. Our group was the only ones who didn't get pretty crystal ornaments. Just wet pipe cleaners.
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….this week's manga updates ^^
(c) Bisco Hatori (Ouran High School Host Club)
This is the LONGEST manga rant i've ever written...
well... except for the Samurai Deeper Kyo one.. that melmel witnessed in person where I pretty much talked in a very rapid pace for 2 hours. yeah. go me. so. here it is….
this is just all about mangas. nothing else…. oh. and I have finals next week….
Naruto 385 ……uh… and the battle ensues. there 'ya go… ^^ oh. and a little history lesson about the sharingan..blah blah blah..
BLEACH 306 …..eh. nothing much happens. yeah.
….and the BEST update… [This is LONG. and MIGHT BE… or.. erm. IS confusing….so…. if u don't wanna read… that's fine. lol….so.. yeah]
Ouran High School Host Club 57 …the one and ONLY manga that makes me feel all romanc-y and girly…which is REALLY weird… coz I don't usually like this genre….. but.. anyway…..
Ouran. YAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AWEEEEEEESOOOOOOOOOOOOMEEEEEEEEEEE………. …..spoilers here on. i love this chapter so much. i'm not leaving anything out.
so. ok.
Life at the Music Room 3 continues like normal.. EXCEPT… 4 people are acting out of character. ^^
1 Hikaru has changed his color to something dark… because he and Kaoru have realized their individuality….On other issues…. AHEM. Hikaru………………….. seems to be CONSTANTLY NEEDING to follow his brother's advices and orders about uh… controlling himself. I dunno why. But he seems to want to get Tamaki off of Haruhi's back all the time. I WONDER WHY. hmmmm ^^ (For every 3 minutes he can wait and succesfully control himself… Kaoru puts 100Y in his piggy bank…lol) ..of course. once the 3 minutes is over. He runs after them REALLY fast. LOL…. (sound effects: SLAM! WAITING'S OVER!)
2 Kaoru… at this point… have given up on his pursuit for Haruhi because he realized who Haruhi really loves. HOWEVER. He makes it clear that he is on Hikaru's side. ..and constantly gives advices on how to deal with their present predicament (which will be presented on the next 2 characters). He also goes out of the way to make sure the next 2 characters figure out their feeling for each other ON THEIR OWN.. (poor Nekozawa…lol) because according to him. Helping the 2 is cheating… and would TOTALLY kill off the chances Hikaru MIGHT have… coughif there is actually anycough
..oh. here's a scene after the "SLAM. WAITING's OVER.. which is the scene after the dialogue I wrote under Honey's section down there…. so. here: Kyoya: Isn't 100Y each time too cheap? Kaoru: How naive, Kyoya-sempai! For Hikaru to make Haruhi turn around, it's no good if he doesn't at least do this much!!! Because at any rate, if he were to confess now, he would definitely be rejected!! Hikaru: KAORU!!! No matter how you look at it… You're saying too much!!! Kaoru: Here. hands over a book to him Since you got angry.. I'll add a book reading assignment in your training program--- Hikaru: stops ..and goes to read a book DAMNIT! Honey: You really are hard with him, Kao-chan. Kaoru: Kinda… It is the whip of love.. Leave him to me from now on
3 Tamaki. Hmmm….. He.. as usual. and like what you expected. is VERY THICK. (and yes. I'm using Ron Weasley vocabulary here). He doesn't realize WHY Haruhi is SICK… why SHE is obviously avoiding him… why she is red.. and why her body temperature goes up when he's with her. …"Your temperature has suddenly risen! We should call an ambulance!!" …He actually thinks of taking her to the hospital for check up the next day. Hmmm…. CHARACTER WISE. He has IMPROVED GREATLY. For the first time in the history of this manga… Kyoya isn't the only one managing the club. Tamaki too…. is now supervising Kyoya's work. KNOW WHY? Because he's using the club to practice his business skills… since if you remember in chapter 56… Haruhi told him there's nothing wrong for going for the whole Suoh heir business… so…. he's completely business-like now. EXCEPT WHEN IT COMES TO HARUHI.
4 OUR HEROIN. VERY. VERY. VEEEERRRYYY. confused about herself. Hmmm… >> WHY oh WHY is she ALWAYS having this cold-like sickness? coughlovesickcough …she SAID she went to the doctor. But they seem to tell her she's COMPLETELY healthy. Hmmm…. ^^ ..of course… DADDY is worried. So he checks up on her temperature by touching her cheeks. Our heroin blushes. And her heartbeat quickens… so.. she avoids him. Tamaki… thinking her daughter hates him… runs after her… and they practically play TAG inside Music Room 3. …GUESS WHAT's HIKARU doing? ^^
eh..here's a scene after the dialogue in the Kaoru section: Kaoru: More than that, the problem is Haruhi's attitude towards Tono (Tamaki). She is obviously conscious of him. Honey: Yes. She is.. Kyoya: She has said something like she has a "cold". Haruhi is unaware of it herself.
..and the other 3 characters. why not.
5 Honey. …aside from his usualy sweets addiction… well.. here's a conversation…
H: What do you think Takahashi (Mori)? M: ………… H: That's right… like I thought. Haru-chan has been acting weird ever since then. I don't know what happened between her and Tama-chan.. but it may be "THAT." Kyoya: It IS "THAT." If you want proof, LOOK: *Hikaru seething with a dark look in his eyes.. with a LOT of the word "anger" surrounding him… and Kaoru looking at his watch waiting for 3 minutes Kyoya: ….Hikaru is in a bad mood. *Mori and Honey sweatdrops*
…now isn't THAT the funniest scene EVER? ..oh. and this is happening while Tamaki and Haruhi are playing TAG. LOL
6 Mori : ah. ….need I say more? [He acually doesn't say anything…. as u might have read in that dialogue up there]
7 Kyoya…… "We give them because our happiness is for everybody to come everyday to the host club in good health" (thinking: and more importantly for merit points) …haha.. typical Kyoya ^^ …and of course. as expected. He just stands there to watch…. probably collecting DATA.. knowing HIM.
8 Mei. I honestly never liked Mei. I mean.. she's ok.. but yeah. Anyhow… she is AWESOME in this chapter. Know why? Because she gives Haruhi a MAGAZINE. A TEEN MAGAZINE.
So. the next day. Haruhi comes in school….. remembers what she read in the magazine. and realizes she's in love with Tamaki. THE END. ^_^ yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so. yeah. the end of my manga rant.
Naruto is by Masashi Kishimoto BLEACH is by Tite Kubo Ouran Koukou (High School) Host Club is by Bisco Hatori
…go read them!! lol… if u want. [And wow. when I started this… I was in a REALLY REALLY bad mood. I'm ok now! ..happy even!!!!!]
Oh. I also read Vampire Knight by Hino Matsuri………
anyhow. I KNOW you don't care about what I read… but mel told me to tell her what the mangas I read are so..here they are. ^^
PS. This blog was originally posted on DeviantArt.
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okay so. couple weeks ago my sister broke her nose. she got it set but it was still kind of crooked, so she had an appointment today to set it straight. she asked me to come with her because last time she passed out and her boyfriend barely caught her lol.
anyways i’m with her at this appointment holding her hand, watching her get stuck in the face with numbing needles and grimacing because it looks painful, and she’s squeezing my hand and i’m squeezing back and i start to get lightheaded and i think, there’s no fucking way.
here’s the thing. i am not queasy about medical procedures or whatever. a couple months ago i took my nonna to her dentist appointment and held her hand while (gross warning) the dentist numbed her up and fuckin’ dug out the pieces of her rotten tooth. it was disgusting and i had to watch the whole thing bc she was really distressed and there was literally nowhere else for me to look. i’ve also been in first aid crises, right? blood and needles and guts and stuff doesn’t bother me, doesn’t make me queasy, i keep a pretty level head.
but i’ve fainted a few times before (my family has a history) and i know what it feels like, when your ears ring and your stomach gets really tight and you kind of get floaty and you just think oh fuck. and i was like there is no goddamn way my attention seeking ass is about to fucking faint at SOMEONE ELSE’S doctor’s appointment. no. so i grit my teeth and sat on a chair and told myself it Would Be Fine and just breathed through it.
twas not fine! one second i was telling my heart to cool it then next second i was Waking Up On The Floor to my sister’s ENT specialist freaking out a little 💀 i’m still half out of it (bc you are for a couple minutes when you come to) and he’s fussing and my sister is asking me if i’m good and i’m thinking fuck i was supposed to be here to look out for her. i gotta chill out. but i’m aware enough to realise i’m still lightheaded and too shakey to drink water and my stomach’s still tight so i just sat on the floor, didn’t try to get up or anything, and then BOOM i’m waking up on the floor AGAIN 😭😭
luckily this time i was actually fine when i woke up. but the specialist was like hey i think i should call an ambulance. and i was like bitch do not??? i do not want to spend the day in the ER for literally no reason?? so my sister called my mom instead (lol) and my mom was like What The Hell, Jackie, and the specialist demanded to talk to her and my mom was like she’s fine just don’t let her drive. i’ll come get them.
so i had to wait in the lobby and feel horribly guilty as my sister had her nose reset by herself and then my mother had to rush over on her lunch break, pick us up, and then we had to sit in her car in the parking lot for two hours until her work was done boring as HELL especially bc i was fine by then lol
whole thing was so ridiculous it was the most sitcom situation i’ve been in for a while 😭😭accompany my sister to her appointment so she doesn’t faint and then I FAINT TWICE LIKE WHO DOES THIS HAPPEN TO 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
would y’all like another insane storytime 💀
#i am still in shock at this dumb as a situation#and now i have to get my blood tested 🤡#it’s probably low iron tho#personal#longpost
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Not as long as I wanted it to be, but finally here’s Early reacting to Lucifer having amnesia aka spoilers for season 3 I forget what lesson though:
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It was strange to watch the brothers move about the house with an energy and chaos and manner that wasn’t revolved around some prank or scheme. WIth Lucifer gone, such business would usually involve everything he wouldn’t approve of and yet the house was...orderly. The brothers spoke in hushed whispers about current, domestic plans, not one of the words uttered about going behind Lucifer’s back.
Early had grown used to the malicious and sly grins Satan and Belphegor shared between themselves and Mammon’s slick plans, but the looks tossed between the two of them now were furrowed brows lined with concern rather than craft and all of Mammon’s boisterous demands were now echoes of Lucifer’s. Laundry. Homework. Dinner. Consoling. Understanding.
It was weird and Early was starting to wonder if it was they who had hid their head, not Lucifer.
“He’ll be fine,” they finally muttered, the oddity of their surroundings finally bubbling over. “He’s probably just taking a nap.”
Satan looked up from where he’d been planning out tomorrow’s meal schedule with Mammon. “What are you talking about?”
“Lucifer,” Early said, just as confused as Satan had sounded when he’d asked for clarification.
“Lucifer is talking to Lord Diavolo right now - he’s not asleep.”
“No, I mean, like, the real Lucifer. He’s taking a nap. At least, that’s what it feels like.” Early shrugged and settled further back into the couch they laid on, now uncomfortable with all the eyes on them. “I’m still kinda mad he didn’t pee his pants.”
“What?” Satan asked again, and Mammon stiffened besides him, tossing a look at Beel. Early shook their head and held their hands out, hoping to appease them.
“Lucifer could have peed his pants?” Early felt some relief at the awe in Belphie’s voice.
“I mean, yeah. I almost did when I, uh, had amnesia.”
“You what?” Satan was on his feet now, Mammon too, and Early curled their hands back towards themselves to protect their stomach. In the worst case, they’d use their pact with him to calm him down. “I didn’t think it was that important!”
“What was it like? How long did it last? Did you forget everything, too?”
A nervous chuckle escaped them as Satan stepped closer with each step. “Well, I mean, I don’t really remember, that’s the whole thing of it, right? But if you’re asking if I got amnesia because of a three-world shattering revelation of magic causing everything in the known universe to go haywire - then no.” Satan frowned and Early made a note to not attempt a second joke. “I was playing a sport back in my school in the human world and I got tackled pretty hard by a lot of people. I ‘woke up’ and was asked a bunch of questions that I answered and made a couple phone calls that, I guess, when surprisingly well considering I wasn’t who I kept saying I was, and then actually woke up in a hospital. It felt like I’d had a really long nap and I had to pee so bad I almost wet my pants.”
“And that was it? No other information?”
Early shrugged again and spread their hands out in a feeble gesture. “That’s it.” They held a finger up. “I didn’t pee my pants, though.”
Belphie snorted and Satan turned, moving to knock the amused look off his face when Mammon intercepted, grabbing his wrist.
“See? Yer all worryin’ for nothin’. I told ya Lucifer’ll be fine. If some little human can get amnesia and come out fine then of course he will. P’rolly needs the nap, too. Maybe he’ll be less of a stickler.”
“Don’t think you can start telling Lucifer that he lets you get away with your tricks. He wont change when he comes back to himself, you know.” Satan glanced back at Early. “Right?”
Early shrugged.
Mammon grinned. “So there’s a chance!”
#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me satan#obey me mammon#obey me mc#obey me mc: early#my writing#so i got amnesia playing rugby#i had the ball and got tackled so hard most of the field could hear my head hit the ground and had to be carried off#and i remember putting my jersey on before the game but i dont remember my coach or the ambulance or calling a few people#to tell them i had to to the hospital#when i came to i was headed to a hospital and i had to pee so bad i ran into the nearby movie theater in tears lol#i was so lost and confused and honestly p scared but i didnt wanna piss myself on top of that#anywAY didn't know you weren't supposed to go to school the day after getting a major concussion and amnesia for like 2 hours#so i went to school the next day for like the full day and had splitting headaches#was forced to stay home for the next two weeks it was so boring
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hey y’all! i’m at work but i’m gonna try to do a few replies even though formatting on my tablet is a biiiitch. i need a distraction tho because the last thing my (former) manager did before he quit was screw me over and schedule me for ten goddamn days in a row...... so yeah i’m gonna try to channel my murderous energy into writing!
#it's not an ambulance... it's a goddamn HAMbulance! ( out of character. )#the night auditor was gonna work two of my days for me so i could have a break and they only scheduled her for one day next week#but then one of the swing shift people was in an accident? and i don't think they'll have anyone to cover his days#because our other swing shift person put in her two week notice#they even tried to call me this morning to come in early. when y'all already have me for 10 days#i will not be working outside of my posted hours okay thank yewww xoxoxoxo#anyways! i know no one cares lol but i just need to VENT. before i commit a CRIME
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#august living#so hey um. if any of yall saw my last vent post#i had a seizure the next day#so. thats a new funky fresh worry that i have#its been a week and im still recovering like on all levels#i. bit my tongue so hard i might have nerve damage like its not bruised anymore but it still feels weird where it was#my chronic pain has a new like snappy feel to sudden jolts of pain#and well everything was super sore for a few days and im still trying to stretch back out#i dont know if it affected my speech worse than any other type of disturbance does but im not making sentances real good rn#obvs also it was physically harder to speak for a few days#but i get tongue tied so fucking easily all the time anyway so its not a unique symptom#god my back hurts in a vry unique way rn tho#lol tho since this was the first one ive had my brother called an ambulance for me and i spent like 6 hours in the er#i have a follow up neurologist appointment next month to go over the test results of the ekg and ct scan and whatever else they did i think#its literally a phone appointment so well see how useful it is#anyway if i have a seizure disorder now im going to be so mad#i cant drive rn and probably wont be allowed to at all if it turns into a recurrence#and just like. if it does turn into a thing that would be such a fucking all around problem#but if it was literally just a one off thing bc im that stressed abt losing my job i rlly gotta get a new one that doesnt stressmeoutasmuch#anyway its way too late i gotta sleeb
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