#then an act outline(way more specific)
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do you plan out the story of your comic ahead all the way or a bit or not at all
mix of all the way and a bit. i have the ending and some important story beats planned out vaguely, and i have a more substantially laid-out plot up to chapter 21, which is about in the middle of the story (probably. i guess i wouldnt know since i havent actually wrote past it yet.)
#my method is probably not the smartest though lol#i have a worldbuilding doc(the one thats vague)#then a story outline(more laid out)#then an act outline(way more specific)#and then a script for each chapter's dialog and pacing#love getting asks AND talking about my silly comic#ask#livingroombeat
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post-war, canonverse, semi-public sex, fingering, fem!reader, some light degradation, dry humping, MDNI
w/c: ~ 1630
Everything has been so new lately.
Moving to Marley after the war had been an easy decision, but that didn’t mean the physical act of settling into a new place wasn’t without its hurdles. Mostly, it was about adjusting—getting used to the advances in technology that wasn’t present on Paradis. Telephones, cars, radios, even electric stoves were commonplace things that Levi still marveled at.
And then, there was also you.
More specifically, the way you’d both found yourselves quite suddenly thrust into a life after war, a life without titans and the looming threat of death hanging over your heads like a dense fog.
As former comrades, it only made sense once the smoke cleared to navigate this new world together. And Levi was more than happy to experience all manner of firsts at your side.
It’s through this different layer of companionship that Levi learns so many new things about you. How you like your eggs in the morning, how tired you get after having too much pasta, the way the hair at the back of your head always sticks up the next day if you go to sleep with it still wet. He learns how you organize your books on your shelves (by size) and how when you’re having a bad day and tell him to leave you alone, you don’t actually mean it.
He’s always known how to make you laugh, but after eight months of living together under the same roof, he learns how to make you moan. It’s a sound he’d like to bottle forever, the sight of your body arched beneath him a vision too precious to look away for even a second. Even with only one good eye, he soaks it in like you’re a dream that’ll fade if he blinks.
He learns that he likes kissing, and you do too. So, when you lean across the center console of his brand new car at Marley’s drive-in movie theater one summer night, he doesn’t think much of it. At least, not until your hands start wandering and he finds himself pulled into the backseat.
You give him very little time to recover from the surprise of being pulled from his seat before your lips are on his again. The leather of the upholstery groans as you straddle his narrow waist and on instinct, Levi reaches out, eyes still closed as he guides you onto his lap.
His palm splays over the skirt of your dress, hiking it up a little in his haste. When he feels the fabric, he pulls away slightly.
He gently squeezes your thigh, watching the cloth bunch a little in his grasp. The sound of your breath hitching in your throat makes him look up. “What’s got you so worked up, hm?”
Above him, forming words feels borderline impossible. Not while his thumb is drawing circles on the inside of your thigh and he’s looking up at you through those delightfully full lashes. It strikes you that this facet of your relationship is still relatively new, so the warmth on your cheeks doesn’t feel out of place when you swallow around your meekness and say, “You.”
“Me?” Levi’s brows raise, but he thinks he gets it. The moment you’d walked out of your room in this little number, his mind had gone straight to the gutter.
Like he’s revisiting the memory, his hands begin to slowly trail every part of you his eyes drift over—thumbs tracing the tantalizing curve of your breasts, down the silky material over your waist before resting his palms on your hips. When he gives you another subtle squeeze, you roll against him, feeling the hardening outline of his cock through his trousers against your core.
“Can’t help it,” you breathe out slowly, like you're making every effort to remain composed, but the strain in your voice betrays the neediness beneath.
Your palms drift over the soft fabric of his shirt, moving over firm muscle. They’re not as defined as they once were, but you relish in his solid warmth all the same. Enamored by him, always.
He lets you explore unimpeded. You’ve always been handsy—checking him for signs of injury or illness when he inevitably pushed himself too far during expeditions. Now he’s grown used to the way that protective tendency has turned into an act of appreciation and fondness. It makes something light and airy form in his chest when you lean down again to kiss him.
“These windows aren’t tinted,” he says a moment later. The warning is half-hearted and murmured mostly against your lips, in conflict with the way his hands keep you anchored where you are.
His feeble hesitation makes you laugh.
You settle further into his lap, nearly chest to chest now. You can feel the way his breathing has grown labored against you. “No one’s looking at us, Levi.”
It is dark, at least. He has enough sense still to acknowledge that the large screen up front will be capturing most peoples’ attention, even though it’s currently in an intermission right now. There are only fifteen minutes between the double features tonight. A shame, he thinks. When it comes to you especially, he always likes to take his time.
You move your attention to the curve of his jaw, peppering hot, pillowy kisses down the expanse of his neck before suckling the sensitive flesh of his clavicle, and every thought not focused on the present stops.
He closes his eyes, caught between the feeling of your lips on his neck and your warm cunt gliding over his cockhead. Even through several layers of clothes, pleasure rushes through him with each rut of your hips. You’re so warm and pretty that it’s dizzying.
In retaliation, a thumb swipes over your clothed clit, and Levi smirks when your movements almost completely stop. Behind you, the large screen lights up and Levi watches in the soft blue light as you lean back slightly, mouth slightly agape in a silent gasp.
“Never took you for an exhibitionist,” he says, the reflection of the movie behind you mirrored in his unclouded iris.
Before you can say anything, he hooks two fingers around your panties and pulls them to the side, sliding the digits through the arousal that’s already beginning to soak into the cotton.
“I-I’m not,” you attempt to defend, but the protest comes out weak and shaky with his movements.
“Is that right?” Levi asks, his tone mildly condescending. “Well, the fact that you’re grinding on top of me right now says otherwise.”
The pressure of his fingers on your cunt makes it difficult to think. If you were in your right mind, you might be embarrassed about the way the windows have started to fog, but you can only be grateful for the extra coverage.
The air is thick and your body feels like it’s on fire. Every brush of Levi’s fingers on your skin sends you aflame. His injured hand anchors you in place, thumb rubbing soothing circles into the flesh of your hip while his other hand continues to pick you apart, making your knees quiver.
Your voice is a strained gasp against the shell of his ear. “Like you’re not hard already just from kissing.”
“I never said I wasn’t.”
The hand on your hip lowers, and for a moment you think he’s gesturing for you to get up, but the new position allows his other hand to slide down. Two fingers quickly bottom out inside your cunt.
Your features pinch with the effort it takes to keep yourself quiet.
“There you go,” Levi coos, smug as your fingers struggle for purchase on his shoulders. “Is that what you wanted?”
His cock, his fingers, his mouth. All three. You want to tell him that you’d gladly take anything he’d give you, but all you can do is pant uselessly into his neck and try to hold on.
“Couldn’t wait until we got home, hm?” Levi continues, his fingers pumping and curling in such a way to make you see stars in your vision. “Needy thing.”
You clench around him, spurred on by his words. “Levi.”
He keeps talking, undeterred. A glow appears in his eyes as you rock into his palm, meeting his movements. “Dirty girl, fucking my fingers like this in the open.”
Pleasure coils in your belly. You grasp helplessly against his sturdy neck, cheeks burning and nails dragging over the soft fuzz of his undercut as it continues to build and build. The pressure of his thumb on your clit pulls all of your muscles taut.
When your moans become wispy and delicate gasps of air, he knows you’re right on the edge.
“Let go, sweetheart,” Levi murmurs. “You can come.”
Your orgasm hits you like a train. With a single gasp of his name, you come undone. Levi holds you through it as you shudder and spasm, his free arm now wrapped around your waist.
When you pull back, your eyes are bleary and content. Every muscle in your body seems to relax against him.
Levi pulls his hand from between your legs. “Satisfied?”
“Mmm,” is all you can manage. The aftershocks still continue to wash over you, making you feel boneless and tired.
When they subside, you give him a quick peck and slide off of his lap, climbing back into the front passenger seat.
Levi follows with a grunt. When he settles back into the driver’s seat, he buckles his seatbelt and starts the car.
You turn, confused. “What are you doing? The movie isn’t over.”
Slowly, he eases out of the parking spot toward the exit. Just before he turns onto the road, he gives you an incredulous look.
“You think I can focus on anything else after that?” From the streetlight above, you can finally see the deep shade of pink tinting his neck and face. “I’m taking you home so I can really make you scream.”
#levi ackerman smut#levi x reader#levi ackerman x reader#levi ackerman x fem!reader#post war levi#levi ackerman#aot fic#levi drabble#not sfw
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Hey do you think you could watch and give your throughts on youtuber Jonas Čeika video "marx was not a statist"?
Thank you
Quite honestly, the title alone already betrays some amount of anarchist metaphysics, the concept of stateism is a purely idealist notion which only works if you are a liberal about authority. But regardless, I still watched the full thing.
The video starts with a very semantic-focused discourse on how marx never used "socialism" to mean the lower phase of communism, and way too much time on the terms transitionary period/DotP as if they weren't two terms that refer to the same thing. In the case of socialism/lower phase of communism, I think he's obfuscating. He focuses the discussion on whether Marx used a certain term in the same way we do now. This would be like spending a good 5 minutes of a video presenting, with an almost accusatory disposition against modern communists, how the bolsheviks called themselves social-democrats, pretending like the terms haven't simply evolved. He promises an "active engagement with marxist theory" and he starts by arguing semantics. He even acknowledges this possible criticism, but you also then have to defend why that criticism is not valid, instead he acts like merely acknowledging it will make that criticism invalid. I'm also spending this time on this specific point because, later, he also forgets how Marx used the word "socialism".
When he does define the lower stage of communism, he engages in a very mechanic and economicist view, with the simple train of thought: No money (replaced with vouchers) > no capital to accumulate > no classes > no state. I think that just by asking how these vouchers will be regulated and how access to wealth restricted to the use of those vouchers, the conclusion that the substitution of money necessarily leads through that chain to the disappearance of the state becomes, very transparently, downright infantile.
In his point about how the Paris Commune changed Marx's view on the state, he cites excerpts in a very misleading way. The whole point starts by pointing out that, in the preface to the 1872 edition, the experience of the Paris Commune led Marx and Engels to the following analysis: "...the working class cannot simply lay hold of the ready-made state machinery, and wield it for its own purposes". This, along with a disregard of the importance of the specific policy points they outlined in the manifesto, and the importance of absolute centralization, means to him that Marx and Engels, actually, completely disregarded the use of the state on the road to communism. To quote Lenin: "Listen, comrade from Tiflis, one may prevaricate, but one should know the limit...."
What the video doesn't directly address (and although he talks about the text extensively, It's important to cite ideas where they actually come from), is that this quote, although it appeared in the 1872 edition of the manifesto, comes from Civil War in France, a longer text on the Paris Commune. This is a more complete context of that quote that the video never gives [ID in alt text]
That quote is the beginning of a chapter in which Marx describes how the Paris Commune governed itself, and how it broke with the series of revolts that happened throughout the period of feudalism, how the class character of the Commune marked it as the significant event that it is. It is true that the Commune's aspirations for the entire world was for its form to be replicated even in the smallest hamlet, and it may even be true that this influenced Marx to generally reject centralization of the state. However, what the breadtuber obviates throughout the entire video, is that a small state is still a state, and furthermore, that revolutionary strategy is not dictated by what is right or wrong, but by what can be done to advance the cause of the emancipation of the working class. It is one thing to reject the state outright, and another very different thing to acknowledge that it is necessary to take control of the state to emancipate the working class, even if you abstractly oppose the concept of a state. Not only to take control of the state, which is the point of the original quote, it is necessary to create our own worker's state, in whichever form it best suits the concrete reality: "the working class cannot simply lay hold of the ready-made state machinery, and wield it for its own purposes". Jonas says that the proletariat should, instead, create "radically democratic working class institutions". These gentlemen think that when they have changed the names of things they have changed the things themselves.
Instead of understanding that point, he goes even further. Jonas has understood that, by praising the measures taken by the Paris Commune (which, let's remember, failed after two months!), Marx and Engels began to believe that "[the state] is by nature bourgeois". Maybe Jonas started reading Bakunin instead of Marx without realizing, this is perhaps the most liberal and historically illiterate portion of the 30+ minute video essay. Again, comrade from breadtube, one may prevaricate, but one should know the limit. In fact, Marx even says in the same text being discussed: "It is generally the fate of completely new historical creations to be mistaken for the counterparts of older, and even defunct, forms of social life, to which they may bear a certain likeness". The irony needn't be explained.
As if Jonas hadn't misconstrued the text and Marx enough, he shows the quote: "... although there is nothing socialist in them except their tendency...". At first I was unable to find this specific quote in Civil War in France, not in any chapter nor in the footnotes. As it turns out, this quote is not from Civil War in France, as Jonas so succinctly cites it, but from the draft of the text. First, it's simply dishonest to cite such a cherrypicked line from a draft and passing it off as something Marx published.
There might be a myriad of possible reasons why this idea did not make it into the final text, but in order for the audience to correctly follow along, it's necessary for them to know where an idea comes from. Beyond this, which I find misleading enough, the video makes the point that with this line, Marx is clearly differentiating between a dictatorship of the proletariat and socialism. But hang on, didn't Jonas spend the first 5 minutes of the video explaining that, in the times of Marx, socialism was understood to be a reformist and petit-bourgeois stance? So, then, how could this out of context, unpublished line be Marx making a distinction between lower-phase communism and the dictatorship of the proletariat? This is the phrase's context [ID in alt text]:
The actual point of this portion is not even related to what Jonas makes it out to be. Here, using "socialist" as another name for utopians, Marx makes the distinction between previous movements of utopians, those socialist sects, and the Paris Commune, because even though their goals, the emancipation of labor, may appear similar, there is nothing socialist [utopian] in them because their means are not utopian, but the beginnings of scientific communism. So, then, not only did Jonas go back on the first point of the video to dunk on the evil stalinists, and not only did he completely remove the context of a phrase by failing to cite properly, but he also failed to even understand the points made in the text he's cherrypicking. Is this what passes for "active engaging with marxist texts" in breadtube?
After this portion, which I still consider the better half of the video, he veers into talking about socialism in one country, first by, again, very blatantly removing important parts of the texts he talks about. The quote he shows, from Principles of Communism, is as follows: "Will it be possible for this revolution to take place in one country alone? No. By creating the world market, big industry has already brought all the peoples of the Earth [...] into such close relation with one another that none is independent of what happens to the others [...] It follows that the communist revolution will not merely be a national phenomenon but must take place simultaneously in all civilized countries [...] It is a universal revolution and will, accordingly, have a universal range." It is true that Engels states that communist revolutions cannot be confined to the national scale, but those ommissions hide a lot of nuance that is very relevant to discussing Marx and Engels' positions on the national/international question. This is the full quote [ID in alt text]:
Marx and Engels were unable to completely and correctly analyze the imperialist form of capitalism, which hadn't yet fully crystallized, economically speaking. According to them, since capitalism was the most developed in places like England or France, the proletariat was also more developed, and the socialist revolution would happen first in these places, and propagate outwards. This notion was proved false by both theory (Lenin's imperialism) and by practice. Lenin identified that, as imperialism settled down as the highest stage of capitalism, the imperialist chain could only be broken at the weakest link, which was Russia at the time. I'm insisting on Lenin's theories because Jonas also claims Lenin to the "not statist" camp, and the video very quickly loses any originality by defaulting to the narrative of Stalin betraying Marx and Lenin by rejecting the world-wide revolution in the short-medium term as a pre-requisite for the establishment of a dictatorship of the proletariat. I think that going more in depth into this will only make this response unnecessary longer, but to end it, I think it's apt to end with a Lenin quote which directly refutes this anti-Lenin betrayal notion:
A United States of the World (not of Europe alone) is the state form of the unification and freedom of nations which we associate with socialism—about the total disappearance of the state, including the democratic. As a separate slogan, however, the slogan of a United States of the World would hardly be a correct one, first, because it merges with socialism; second, because it may be wrongly interpreted to mean that the victory of socialism in a single country is impossible, and it may also create misconceptions as to the relations of such a country to the others.
Uneven economic and political development is an absolute law of capitalism. Hence, the victory of socialism is possible first in several or even in one capitalist country alone. After expropriating the capitalists and organising their own socialist production, the victorious proletariat of that country will arise against the rest of the world—the capitalist world—attracting to its cause the oppressed classes of other countries, stirring uprisings in those countries against the capitalists, and in case of need using even armed force against the exploiting classes and their states. The political form of a society wherein the proletariat is victorious in overthrowing the bourgeoisie will be a democratic republic, which will more and more concentrate the forces of the proletariat of a given nation or nations, in the struggle against states that have not yet gone over to socialism. The abolition of classes is impossible without a dictatorship of the oppressed class, of the proletariat. A free union of nations in socialism is impossible without a more or less prolonged and stubborn struggle of the socialist republics against the backward states.
On the Slogan for a United States of Europe, V. I. Lenin (1915)
Overall, I think this video lacks any kind of rigor or respect for the texts discussed. Citations are pretty predominantly misleading or incomplete in some way, he extrapolates fantastical ideas from texts he doesn't appear to understand, and more in general, the way the video is concienved reeks of dogmatism, the arguments overwhelmingly boil down to "Marx said this (according to me), so it must be true". There is no actual engagement with texts, but there isn't even a will to engage with history. Marxism does not end with Marx and Engels, it's a philosophical and political framework that extends beyond the gospel of incomplete quotes. Even if Marx and Engels really did believe such anti-materialist ideas as "the state is bourgeois by nature", it would not change the facts that the history and experiences after the Paris Commune should also have weight in order to reach conclusions.
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I don't know if Bumble would have been outright treasured in modern ThunderClan, but at the very least, there's no way they would have been "just as bad" as The Settlers in kicking her out like that.
Yes there is active xenophobia against outsiders, and yes, the fatphobia is still around. But this is a Clan that sheltered several kittypets in Bramblestar's Storm-- and even Minty, who was completely unwilling to adapt to Clan life, was treated with infinitely more respect than Bumble.
Most likely is that ThunderClan recognizes that Bumble is being hurt, doesn't really want to leave her housefolk, and sends out a patrol to deal with Tom. Like... especially if anyone remembered Jacques and The Dreaded Susan.
Well... assuming the new team managed to stay consistent with the characterization of the old. But even New Team Modern ThunderClan doesn't act nearly as bad as DOTC cats do.
That's a piece that sticks out so much about The Bumble Debaucle. Thunder Rising is the first book the new team did all on their own, just following a plot outline. The style of WC has always been rather mean-spirited-- but some of the grossest, cruellest scenes in the WHOLE series come from Thunder Rising and First Battle specifically.
It's weird that DOTC is such a low point, overall.
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Highway Heat
Summary: Your car breaks down in the middle of nowhere and the trucker you flag down offers more than just roadside assistance.
A/N: Lord oh lord… I tried to be good i swear, i really tried to behave. The thing is my sweet beta reader @hautecouture02 requested a little roadside encounter one shot with Joel, specifically asking for FLUFF, and i swear on everything holy I tried my best to keep it PG… but sometimes things don’t go as I planned. So here, take this absolute filth of a one shot that’s little more than PWOP. ENJOY!!!!
Warnings: As previously stated, this is pretty much PWOP, Trucker!Joel i know nothing about trucks lol, maybe some dub!con at first but the internal dialogue shows hella consent, groping, fingering, a bit of praise and a bit of degradation, pet names like so many of them im not gonna list them all almost too many pet names if you believe in such a thing, grinding, oral male receiving, deep throating
Masterlist
You’re a good person—hell, a great person even. You give your spare change to homeless people, you donate to the puppy shelter every once in a while, you hold your friend’s hair back when they’re throwing up in the back of the club. You’re definitely not the type of person who deserves to be stranded in the middle of nowhere, sweating buckets despite wearing nothing but a spaghetti strap tank and the tiniest pair of shorts you own. This feels like some kind of cosmic punishment.
It is, undoubtedly, the worst possible time for your car to stop working. You’d been putting off the usual checkups on your car for months, knowing full well it was overdue for an oil change, a tire rotation—or whatever men who know their way around a toolbox always say. Your ex used to handle all of that for you, always acting like it was his job to make sure your car ran smoothly. He was that kind of guy who would go out of his way to make your life easier—didn’t mean he was above cheating though.
So now, you’re stuck in your geriatric Honda Civic, the AC busted and the engine refusing to start.
After a few minutes of trying to will it back to life, it’s clear you’re stranded.
You step out of the car, and the heat hits you like a goddamn slap to the face. The road’s deserted, no signs of life for miles, and of course, your phone has no signal. Perfect. Just fucking perfect. You glance down the road, hoping for a miracle, when you spot the rough outline of a truck—a big one, maybe a sixteen-wheeler—coming up in the distance.
Relief washes over you for about two seconds before your brain kicks in, running through every horror movie scenario. But it’s not like you’ve got a buffet of options, so you throw up your hand, waving the truck down as it rolls closer.
It’s a beat-up old thing, paint chipped and covered in dust, but it comes to a slow stop right behind your car. The door creaks open, and out steps a man.
He’s tall, broad, with a face lined with age and tan from long days under the sun. The net cap he wears lets a few of his longer dark curls peek out, the front pieces overpowered by graying hair. He sports a faded plaid shirt and jeans, a pair of well-worn boots kicking up dust as he steps toward you. His dark, intense eyes size you up like you’re part of the landscape he’s used to navigating.
“You alright there, sweetheart?” His voice is deep and gravelly, but the drawl is the star of the show, thick and sweet like honey.
You clear your throat, trying to keep your frustration in check. “Car broke down. Won’t start. No service either.”
He nods slowly, like this is exactly the kind of situation he expects to find out here. “Well, good thing I’m passin’ through.”
You can’t help but roll your eyes a little at that, but desperation makes you bite your tongue. “Think you could take a look?”
He stares at you for a moment, long enough that you wonder if he’s going to offer any help at all. But then he lets out a low sigh, scratches the back of his neck, and walks over to your car, popping the hood like it’s second nature.
For a while, there’s nothing but the sound of him tinkering under the hood, the occasional grunt or muttered curse as he checks things out. You stand there awkwardly, feeling the heat bearing down on you, watching as beads of sweat gather at the back of his neck.
Finally, he steps back, wiping his hands on his jeans. “Shit’s runnin’ on fumes. When’s the last time you had it serviced?””
You shift, feeling stupid. “A while. My ex used to handle it, and, uh… I’ve been busy.”
He gives you a look, something between amusement and pity, before shaking his head. He leans against the car, arms crossed. “I can tow you to a shop in the next town, but it gon’ be a ride.”
You blink up at him, surprised at his offer. “You don’t mind?”
“Nah,” he says, with a shrug, “I’m headin’ that way anyway.”
He moves back to his truck, grabbing a few chains and a tow hitch from the back. Within minutes, he’s hooking up your beat-up Honda Civic to the rear of his truck, working with the ease of someone who’s done this a hundred times before.
“You sure this is safe?” you ask, watching him as he tightens the last chain.
“As safe as it’s gonna get,” he replies with a shrug, brushing the dust from his hands. “Ain’t no mechanic shop out here, so this’ll do ‘til we get to the next town.”
You hesitate, then eye him. “You’re not gonna, like, chop me up and throw me in a ditch, are you?”
He chuckles at that, a nice gravely sound. “If I was, don’t think I’d tell ya, sugar. But no, I ain’t in the business of chopping people up.”
You look at him for a bit longer before sighing. “Fuck it, let’s go.”
He turns, heading back to his truck, his broad back facing you and making it a hell of a lot harder to concentrate
“Name’s Joel, by the way,” he says, glancing back over his shoulder as he opens the passenger door for you.
“Thanks, Joel,” you say, stepping up into the truck’s cab, the cool air from his AC hitting you like a blessing. Maybe your luck hasn’t run out just yet.
You sink back into the seat as he climbs up on his side of the cab, letting the icy air wash over you. There’s something else prickling at your senses though—something that has nothing to do with the temperature. It’s him.
Joel’s glances are obvious, a little too long, lingering like he’s sizing you up. Normally, it’d make you roll your eyes, maybe even tell him off. Old guy like him eyeing you up is nothing you’re unfamiliar with. But today? With the way your body feels sticky and tired, and the way the breakup has left you all out of sorts… you’re almost enjoying it.
You’ve been craving attention and the shitty one night stands with guys from dating apps have done nothing to satiate that need. It’s been months since anyone has touched you and that rational part of your brain that would be yelling at you to be aware of the sleazy old trucker who just picked you off of the side of the road is sounding real quiet right now.
“So…” His voice pulls you from your thoughts as he shifts in his seat, resting one hand lazily on the wheel. “Where you headed?”
You hesitate, eyes on the road ahead. “Just… trying to get home.”
He hums, slow and deliberate. “Home, huh? Got anyone waitin’ on you there? Boyfriend?”
The word slices through you, sharper than you expected. You tighten your jaw, glancing out the window. “No. Not anymore.”
Joel makes a sound, somewhere between a laugh and a grunt. “Well, ain’t that a shame. Pretty thing like you, all alone.”
You should hate the way he says it, the way his eyes flicker toward you like he’s just waiting for an opening. But instead, there’s a strange warmth pooling in your stomach, your pulse picking up in a way you’re not proud of. You shift in your seat, crossing your legs like it’ll somehow tamp down the growing tension in your body. He doesn’t miss it, his smirk growing a little wider.
“That line work on most girls?” you quip, trying to keep things light.
Joel chuckles, the sound low and dangerous. “Depends on the girl. But you look a little… flustered.”
Your cheeks heat up, and it’s not just the sun this time. “I’m not flustered.”
“Sure about that, darlin’?”
You glare at the open road, biting your lip as you try to ignore the way his words are messing with your head—and your body. It’s been way too long since anyone’s looked at you like this. Really looked at you.
The silence stretches out as the truck rumbles along the deserted road. You try to focus on anything but the tension in the air and find it’s impossible. His presence feels inescapable, it fills the cab wrapping around you, pressing down on every nerve.
“You never told me,” Joel says after a while, breaking the quiet. “Where’s home?”
“Texas,” you say quietly, your voice a little steadier now. “But I’m not in any rush to get back.”
“Family trouble?” he asks, his eyes flicking toward you again.
“Something like that,” you mutter. “It’s complicated.”
He hums in response. “Don’t I know it.”
You shift in your seat, crossing your legs, catching Joel watching you out of the corner of his eye. His gaze lingers a little too long on your bare thighs, and there’s a flicker of something dark passing over his face, but he says nothing.
You want to ignore it—God, you should ignore it—especially since you’re stuck with him for a while longer. But the rising heat in your body and the quickening pulse beneath your skin make it hard to think straight, harder still to make good decisions.
So you bite.
“You gonna keep staring, or is this part of your charm routine?” You cock a brow, trying to ignore the way warmth crawls up your neck.
A slow smirk curls at his lips, but he doesn’t look away. If anything, he leans in closer, his hand resting just near your leg, making the air between you buzz. “You think I’m layin’ it on too thick?”
“Little bit,” you quip back, though your voice betrays you with how soft it comes out. You bite your lip, trying to stay sharp, but his eyes flick down to the movement, and the pulsing need low in your stomach tightens. “It’s not working, though.”
His smirk widens, like he’s enjoying this far too much. “Funny. Seems to me it’s workin’ just fine.”
You roll your eyes, but you can’t hide the way your heart races when he shifts closer, his fingers brushing against your leg. The touch is light, almost casual, but it’s enough to send a shiver racing up your spine, your breath catching in your throat.
“You can roll your eyes all you want, doll. It don’t change the fact I can see what you need, clear as day,” he purrs, his voice dropping lower.
“Oh yeah? And what’s that?” you snap back, though your words lack the heat you want them to have.
“Little bit of attention.”
He reads you too well. It drives you insane. “I don’t need anything from you. Just get me where I need to go.”
A quiet chuckle rumbles from his chest. “That so? ’Cause the way you’ve been shiftin’ in that seat says otherwise.”
You bristle at his words, but the truth sticks like a thorn. There’s a reason you haven’t told him to stop, a reason you haven’t shut this down. You’re tired, frustrated, and the way his eyes keep grazing over you… you can’t stop wondering how easy it’d be to let him pull you under, to let him take all your worries away.
“You’re losing it, old man,” you shoot back, even though you know it’s a losing game. He sees right through you, but that doesn’t mean you’re gonna make it easy.
“Am I?” he purrs, his hand sliding up to rest fully on your thigh. “So, you don’t want me touching you like this, darlin’?”
The way he says it—slow, deliberate, laced with that sweet, thick accent—it’s all innocence, even though everything about it screams otherwise. You know you’ll be hearing that “darlin’” in your head later, when you’re playing with yourself.
You smirk, giving him a little more rope. “I didn’t say that.”
He hums, eyes flicking between the road and your legs. “And I’m guessin’ you wouldn’t say a word if I moved my hand higher, would you?”
Your legs part just slightly, almost like an instinct. Barely noticeable to anyone else. But not to Joel.
“Look at you,” he drawls, a shit-eating smirk spreading across his lips. “Already makin’ it easier for me.”
You’re about to fire back, ready to keep this banter rolling, when his fingers slide higher. A soft sigh escapes your lips before you can stop it.
“You ready to stop actin’ up, or we still playin’ cat and mouse, pretty girl?” His eyes lock on yours, dark and unwavering.
Your pulse quickens at the challenge in his voice, your breath catching in your throat. His fingers are still on your thigh, warm and rough, and it’s messing with your head. You know you should stop this now, make him pull his hand back, but you’re not sure if that’s what you want.
“I’m not acting up,” you murmur, trying to hold on to some sense of control, even though his touch is making that damn near impossible.
His grin widens, like he’s got you exactly where he wants you. “Mhm, sure you ain’t.”
You glare at him, but it’s weak. Pathetic, really, and the worst part is he knows it. He knows how to get under your skin even though he has known you for half an hour, knows exactly what buttons to push to unravel you just enough to keep you hanging on.
“I mean it,” you snap, though your voice wavers. His hand shifts slightly on your thigh, fingers curling just enough to make your stomach twist into knots.
“I wanna believe you,” His voice is low, a quiet rumble that vibrates through you, all the way down to where you’re aching for him to touch you. He leans in a little more, so close now that you can feel the heat radiating off him, smell that familiar scent of worn leather and something dark and intoxicating. “But you keep lettin’ me touch you. Kinda sends a different message, don’t you think?”
Your heart’s pounding in your chest, the steady rhythm of it loud in your ears. You don’t know how to answer, don’t know if you want to answer. Every rational thought in your head is telling you to stop, but your body isn’t listening.
Instead, you shift slightly, your leg pressing into his hand, just enough to encourage him to keep going. His eyes darken, and a slow, dangerous smile tugs at his lips.
“Thought so,” he mutters, and then his fingers start to move again, sliding higher, testing the boundaries you haven’t set.
You bite your lip, trying to hold back the sigh that’s clawing its way up your throat, but it slips through anyway. He hears it, of course he does, and the satisfied gleam in his eyes makes your face flush with heat.
“You wanna tell me to stop, now’s your chance,” he murmurs, his voice soft but carrying an edge of challenge, like he knows damn well you’re not going to.
His gaze shifts between the road and you and it almost seems like every time those eyes are back on you they become darker.
You glance at him, your heart in your throat, and there’s that flicker of hesitation—you should say something, should stop this before it goes any further—but the way his fingers are brushing higher, dangerously close to the ache between your legs, makes it impossible to think straight.
So you just meet his gaze, and you don’t say a word.
His smirk grows, and his hand drifts even higher. “Good girl.” This time he fully gropes your thigh, groaning like he’s been waiting to unleash this. “You wanna take these off for me, sweetheart? Let me give you as much attention as you want.”
He must have some psychic hold on you because you follow his instructions with no hesitation this time. Your fingers eagerly unbotton your shorts and pull the zipper down, lifting your hips to shimmy them down.
He looks at you for a lot longe than he should taking into account he’s currently driving a beast of a vehicle. “Lord above… you’re a sight and a half, darlin’”
He goes back to massaging your thigh, making circles with his thick fingers, going each time higher. Once he reaches your panties he stops and just rests his hand there, right at the edge of where you want him most. His fingers teasingly brush the fabric, enough to make you gasp, but he doesn’t go any further.
“You’re gonna have to ask for it,” he rasps, his voice thick with something darker now. “Tell me what you want, pretty girl.”
His words are like a key turning in a lock, and your resistance crumbles. You can’t deny it anymore, not when his hand is right there, so close to what you need, your entire body burning up under his touch.
“Joel…” you whisper, your voice almost pleading now, barely more than a breath.
“That’s it,” he murmurs, his hand pressing a little more firmly, his fingers tracing along the outline of your heat through the fabric. “That’s what I wanna hear.”
Your breath stutters, and your hips shift on their own, pressing into his hand. You’re barely hanging on, the tension between you two crackling like a live wire, but he’s still holding back, waiting for you to give in completely.
“Please…” you finally manage, the word spilling out before you can stop it. It’s humiliating and liberating all at once.
“Please what?”
You let out the shadow of a moan. “Please touch me.”
Joel’s hand slips under the fabric, his fingers finally finding your core, and the groan that escapes him sends a shockwave of heat straight to your core. “Good girl,” he breathes, his voice like gravel as his fingers start to move in slow, torturous circles.
Your head falls back against the seat, a whimper escaping your lips as he finally gives you what you’ve been craving. “Jesus, Joel…”
“Feels good, huh?” he rasps, his eyes flicking from the road to you, watching the way your body reacts to every touch, every motion of his hand. “Told you I know exactly what you need, baby.”
You’re melting under his touch, your body humming with the pressure of his fingers moving against you, his voice guiding you deeper into the haze of pleasure. You’re not even sure what’s more intoxicating—the way he’s touching you or the way he’s talking to you, that low, commanding tone unraveling you completely.
“That’s it, sweetness, grind on my fingers, make that little pussy feel good” Joel growls, having a harder time keeping his eyes on the road now.
“Fuck… that feels you good da-“ you stop yourself before you’re able to finish the word. Your ex didn’t like you calling him that, so you usually kept that particular kink under wraps, but something about Joel is making it surface back up.
He looks up at you, pupils blown out. “Say it… say wha you wanna say baby.”
You lose all restraint and moan loudly. “It feels so good, daddy.”
“That’s right, babygirl.” He moans “Daddy’s fingers make your pretty cunt fucking drip don’t they?”
His words send a wave of pleasure through your body, a mixture of shame and intense arousal surging in your chest. You’re too far gone to stop now, letting the haze of lust pull you under completely.
“Yes,” you whisper, the word slipping out like a confession. “So fucking wet.”
Joel’s fingers move faster, rough and skilled, coaxing you into a rhythm that has you arching your back against the seat. His other hand grips the wheel tight, knuckles white, and you can tell he’s barely hanging onto his self-control, but that only makes it hotter.
“Jesus, you’re a fuckin’ dream,” he growls, voice thick with desire. “Been wantin’ to ruin you since the minute you sat your pretty ass in this truck.”
The vulgarity, the way he talks to you—it should feel wrong, but instead, it’s like gasoline thrown on the fire already burning inside you. You grind down harder on his fingers, chasing the high he’s offering, the tension building fast in your core.
You glance over at him, his jaw tight, eyes darting between the road and you, and there’s something so filthy about the way he’s trying to keep it together while driving, the way his control is slipping. You want to push him, make him lose it completely.
“You’re losing it too,” you pant, breathless, pushing your hips into his hand. “Can’t even keep your eyes on the road, can you?”
His gaze snaps to yours, dark and predatory. “Careful. Keep talkin’ like that, and I’ll pull this truck over.”
The threat in his voice makes you shiver, heat pooling low in your belly. You’re right on the edge, your body strung tight as a bow, every nerve lit up under his touch.
“Do it,” you challenge, voice breathless and wrecked.
Joel’s eyes flash with something dangerous, his hand gripping your thigh so hard it almost hurts. Without another word, he swerves the truck off the road, gravel crunching under the tires as he pulls into a secluded spot off the highway.
Your heart is pounding, adrenaline mixing with the arousal as he throws the truck into park and turns to face you fully. The look in his eyes is feral, like he’s done holding back, and you brace yourself for what’s coming next.
“Such a little attention whore, baby,” he growls, unbuckling his seatbelt with one hand, the other still teasing you between your legs. “I’m all yours now.”
In one swift motion, he pulls you onto his lap, your thighs straddling his hips, the weight of his hard length pressing against you through his jeans. He is big, a lot bigger than you expected and it makes your mouth water,almost like your body is showing you how badly you need him in a million and one ways.
His hands grip your hips possessively, eyes locking with yours as if daring you to make the next move.
You don’t hesitate. You grind down on him, both of you letting out low moans at the contact. The friction sends sparks flying up your spine, and you can already tell this is about to be the kind of reckless, dirty, no-going-back encounter you’ve both been craving.
Joel’s hands slide up your back, fisting in your hair as he pulls you down to feast on your neck. His lips trail down, biting at the sensitive skin there, and it’s too much, too intense. You feel like you’re going to combust right here in his arms.
“You taste so fuckin’ good,” he mutters against your skin, one hand slipping between you to push your panties aside, his fingers slipping through your slick heat again. “Filthy little slut, letting a stranger put his fingers inside you. Gonna make you come so hard you forget your own name, pretty girl.”
Your hips buck against him, the promise of release so close you can taste it. “Fuck, Joel, please…”
“Try again. You know better.” his tone is firm and commanding, all the previous playfulness gone.
“Please daddy, let me come”
“That’s it,” he groans, his thumb circling your clit with just the right amount of pressure, pushing you right to the edge. “Come for me, darlin’. Let me feel this tight little whole clench on my fingers.”
The way he says it with such authority, has you unraveling in his lap, your entire body trembling as you come hard against his hand. Your vision goes white, pleasure crashing over you in waves as you grip his shoulders, nails digging into his skin.
Joel watches you, his eyes hooded and hungry, soaking in every second of your release. He doesn’t stop moving his fingers until you’re shaking from the aftershocks, your body limp and boneless against him.
“Good girl,” he murmurs, his voice low and satisfied as he finally pulls his hand away, bringing his fingers to his lips to taste you. “Tastes even better than I imagined.”
You’re still catching your breath, head buzzing from the intensity, but the way his hardness presses against you makes it clear you’re far from done. It’s not like those other times when finishing a guy felt like an obligation, when the effort barely felt worth it because they didn’t take the time to get you there first. But Joel? Joel made you come so hard you can’t help but want to return the favor. It’s not a chore—it’s something you crave.
“My turn,” you murmur, fingers already working at the button of his jeans.
His grip tightens on your hips, eyes darkening as he watches your hands move, but there’s a flicker of restraint. “Don’t think that’s a good idea, sweetheart. Can’t have this beast of a truck just parked in the middle of the road.”
You shift back onto your own seat, lifting your leg off his lap to give yourself the space you need. The desire to make him feel just as wrecked as you burns in your chest, so you lean down, your gaze steady on his as your fingers trail lower.
“You can drive,” you say, voice low, teasing. “I’m not stopping you.”
Joel’s eyes flash with something dangerous, his jaw ticking like he’s fighting with himself. For a second, you think he’s going to tell you to stop, but then he huffs out a breath, shaking his head with a low chuckle. “You’re trouble.”
You smile up at him as you feel him start the engine again, your hand slipping lower, teasing him through his jeans.
Joel’s breath hitches as your fingers brush against him, a low growl vibrating in his chest. His hand tightens on the steering wheel, knuckles turning white as he tries to focus on the road, but you can tell he’s losing the battle.
His jaw clenches, a muscle ticking in his cheek as he tries to keep his cool, but you can see right through it. The way his body is responding to your touch, the way he’s barely holding it together, it only spurs you on.
You undo his jeans and pull the zipper down, feeling the heat radiating off him. His breath stutters, and his hand slips to grip the side of the seat, trying to ground himself as you free him from the confines of his jeans.
You wrap your hand around him, feeling how hard he is, how thick, and the groan that escapes his lips sends a thrill through you. “Fuck,” he breathes, eyes flicking between the road and you, his control slipping more by the second.
You lower your head, your lips grazing his tip, and Joel’s entire body tenses. His hips buck up, instinctively searching for more, and you can’t help but smirk as you take him deeper into your mouth.
“Holy shit,” he groans, his voice rough and ragged, his hand instinctively flying to the back of your head, his fingers tangling in your hair. “You’re gonna get us both killed.”
But even as he says it, there’s no hint of him wanting you to stop. He keeps urging you on in slow, measured strokes. The tension in him is palpable, and you can feel the way his control is fraying with every flick of your tongue, every inch you take him deeper.
His breathing grows ragged, and he glances down at you, eyes dark with heat and disbelief. “You’re so pretty with a fat cock stuffed in your mouth baby, look at you ”
You hum around him, the vibration making his hips jerk again, and the low groan that rips from his throat sends a fresh wave of adrenaline coursing through you. He’s unraveling, right in front of you, and you’re loving every second of it.
You pick up the pace, your hand working him in tandem with your mouth, and Joel’s growl turns guttural, his grip on the wheel tightening. “Right there, darlin’ girl, don’t stop…” he hisses, head tipping back slightly as his hips move in time with your rhythm, chasing the release that’s so damn close.
His eyes flick between the road and you, pupils blown, struggling to stay on course even as his focus is being torn apart by you.
“Fuck, baby… I’m not gonna last if you keep—” He cuts himself off with a harsh groan, his hips bucking again, muscles taut and trembling as he loses the last shred of his composure. He’s completely at your mercy now, and it’s making him wild, his control slipping fast.
You don’t let up, your hand dropping lower to play with his balls, and he’s right on the edge, teetering dangerously close. His breath comes in ragged bursts, and his body tightens under you, his hips jerking harder, more desperate now.
“Where do you want it, baby?”
Instead of answering you take him deeper down your throat, your nose burrowing in the dark curls at the base of his cock, his smell so musky and intoxicating it makes you dizzy.
“Shit, shit—” Joel’s voice is a strangled growl, and then you feel him pulse in your mouth, a low, guttural moan tearing from his throat as he finally comes undone. He’s barely holding onto the wheel, the truck swerving just enough to make your heart race, but it’s clear he’s past caring. He spills hot and hard into your mouth, the sound of his release drowned out by the pounding of your own pulse in your ears.
You keep going, milking him for every last bit, until he’s trembling beneath you, his breathing ragged and uneven. When you finally pull away, he’s still gripping the steering wheel like it’s the only thing anchoring him to reality.
“Holy fuck,” he mutters, his voice rough and wrecked. His eyes flick down to you, wild and wide, before darting back to the road. He lets out a breathless, incredulous laugh, shaking his head. “Best hitchhiker I’ve ever picked up, that’s for damn sure.”
As if on cue, the truck finally pulls into the shop, the hum of the engine fading, the weight of what just happened still hung thick between you two. Joel cuts the ignition, his hand lingering on the key for a beat too long, like he wasn’t quite ready to step back into reality. He realizes his now soft cock is still out and starts to zip himself back up.
You try to gather yourself, smoothing your clothes and brushing a hand through your hair as if it’d erase everything that had gone down on that highway. You can tell it’s gonna stick with you for a good while longer though.
Joel clears his throat, glancing over at you with a look that was somehow both satisfied and conflicted. "Well, we’re here," he mutters, but his hand was already fishing in his back pocket for something. "Here." He hands you a crumpled business card, his name scrawled across it with a number underneath. "In case you run into any more car trouble or, y'know... anything else."
The corner of his mouth twitches, like he knows damn well this had nothing to do with the rugged old thing and everything to do with the heat still simmering between you. You take the card, trying to hide the smirk tugging at your lips.
"Thanks," you reply, pocketing it casually, though the way your heart raced gave you away. "For… you know, all of it."
He just gives you that signature look of his—half-smirk, half-smolder—and with that, you slide out of the truck, legs still feeling like jelly as you walked away. You didn't even need to turn around to know his eyes were glued to your retreating figure.
#joel x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller fic#joel miller#trucker!joel#joel smut#joel miller smut#joel x reader smut
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I Need a Doctor pt.2
Pt. 2!!
I had to cut this short because I have midterms... and I've never written smut before so this is a trial run to see if i should advance my skills and continue with it or just stick with fluff!
word count: 1,698
warnings: cursing, smut, 18+ MNDI!!!! fingering, lots if hot kissing, suggestive language, unprotected sex (wrap it up everyone!)
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Fuck it. You don't even bother responding; your body takes over. Your lips crash onto his, taking him by surprise, yet he takes no time reciprocating the kiss. There was a sort of desperation with the way his lips captured yours, begging to be released. His hands find their way to your hips, roughly gripping almost as though to confirm that it is indeed you. His brown locs softly tugged by your hands, drawing him in closer. "Fuck." He mumbles against your lips, causing you to give his hair another tug. He groans softly, his grip on your hips tightening, causing you to slightly gasp against his lips.
Reality finally hits you. Shit. You're in public, more specifically a hallway in a hospital, not exactly the best place to act out your fantasy. You quickly pull yourself away, heart pounding against your chest as you catch your breath. "Charlie..." Your voice drifts off as you press your hands against his chest. "We can't do this... at least not here." A playful smirk tugs at the corner of his lips; his grip on your hips slips away, hands finding yours. He quickly drags you off, not a single thought running through your mind. It almost feels surreal, following behind him, his beautifully tame hair a mess. He looks back at you, a grin on his lips. Everything feels and looks as if it's in slow motion. This can't be real, can it? You're peeled from your thoughts as he pulls you into an empty room, shutting the door behind you. Before you even get the chance to glance at your surroundings, his lips capture yours in a hungry kiss, erasing any thoughts you may have had. Your hand slips between his belt buckle, pulling him against you, eliciting a gasp from the both of you. He pulls away, looking you up and down. "I hope you don't have anything planned after this because I'm going to ruin you." You press your thighs together, the thought alone turning you on.
With that, he slides his black tie off, tossing it to the floor. Your hands immediately get to work on his shirt, hurriedly unbuttoning it. In one swift motion, your shirt is slid over your head, discarded without a second thought. His piercing brown eyes scan over your hungrily, taking in your thick figure. "Not a lot of men can handle me, so I hope you know what you're getting yourself into." You blurt the words out, a hint of doubt in your voice. "Why don't you let my actions speak for themselves?" With that, his hands are back on you, backing you up until the back of your thighs hit the bed. A quiet giggle escapes your lips as you fall back, hitting the soft bed behind you. You adjust yourself, your head falling against the rough hospital pillows. Charlie's hands firmly grip your ankles, slightly pulling you towards him, a squeal leaving your lips. His eyes flicker between yours and your bottoms, and without a second thought, your hands fly down to the buttons on your pants, hurriedly undoing them, popping one off in the process. He finishes pulling them off of you, discarding them across the room.
His lips frantically meet yours once more, as though he had been deprived of this. You stretch your hands over to his belt buckle, giving it a tug. His hands fly down, belt off in one movement. “That desperate huh?” You playfully run your fingertips over the fabric of his pants, feeling the outline of him. His breath hitches in his throat as you touch him. "You don't know what you're doing to me, Y/N." You position yourself upwards, arms flying around his neck, pulling him down to your level, placing one last kiss on his lips before trailing down his jaw, his head leans back, a groan escaping his lips as you trail wet kisses down his neck, gently nipping at his skin. As you work on his neck, his hand finds its way to the waistband of your panties, slowly slipping in two fingers. His fingers tease your entrance, causing you to let out a desperate whine, craving more. "Please Charlie." You beg, back slightly arching, urging him to continue. His fingers slowly dip into your entrance, a moan escaping your parted lips. His fingers move slowly, pulling them out almost fully before dipping back in. You toss your head back, fingers clawing into his shoulders as you moan desperately. "Need more." You plead as his agonizingly slow pace makes your head spin. His pace quickens at your desperate pleas, your eyes fluttering shut as your walls clenched against him, your breath hitching until suddenly, he pulls his fingers out, causing you to cry out at the suddenly empty feeling.
"Can't let you finish that quickly. This is only just the beginning." A taunting smirk tugs at his lips as he tugs at the zipper on his pants, pulling them off quickly before diving back down to your lips as if it were the only thing he needed. His breathing strained as he pushes you back down against the bed, hands interlocking with yours as he pins your arms above your head. His body shuddered against you as your hands explored his body, tracing your nails up and down his back. "Been wanting to do this the moment I saw you." He mumbles against your skin as he works down your neck, nipping and sucking at your hot skin. Your hips buck up softly, eliciting a moan from the both of you at the contact.
"I've been needing a doctor lately; I didn't think this is what my body meant." You breathlessly whisper the words, not even sure if he heard. "I think this is exactly what your body meant." He trails off as your hand slips between the waistband of his boxers. "I think this is what you need, Dr. Mayhew. " He groaned softly, his hips gently buckling at the sudden touch. Your slip his boxers down, his length springing free. "You're in no position to tease; just remember that. His eyes darkened as he stopped all his movements. "Such a desperate fucking slut. I just can't wait to ruin you." He pushes himself off of the bed; you scoot closer to the edge, desperate to feel him inside you. Your arousal grows as his hand grips his length, teasingly rubbing the tip of his cock against your folds. "More." You beg, the throbbing between your legs unbearable. Without hesitation, he snaps his hips into yours roughly, giving you no time to adjust. His head tosses back, eyes rolling as he groans. "Fuck, you feel so freaking good." Your mouth flew open, releasing one of the most sinfully beautiful sounds he had ever heard, which gave him the green light to keep going. With every thrust, the intensity built, the longing for you the moment he saw you, getting closer to you each day. The best reward for all the pent-up desire. His rhythm picked up, each thrust deliberate and purposeful. The pleasure completely consuming you, your legs instinctively wrap around his waist, pulling him closer to you, causing him to go in deeper. He shamelessly let out a string of moans, feeling your walls clench against him, bringing him closer to his release. "Fuck, just like that." You cry out in pleasure; your walls clench around his cock, causing his thrusts to become sloppier. The pressure in your stomach is screaming to be released. "I'm going to cum." You whine out, grip slipping from his hands. He takes this as his cue to wrap his hand around your throat, lifting your head to look at him. "I want you to look at me when you come. I want you to see who makes you feel this good." You look into his eyes, gasping as you feel his dick twitching inside you, causing you to come undone. You cry out his name as you look into his eyes, his cum coming in spurts as he fills you up. The final waves of pleasure wash over you as his head falls down, savoring the feeling of being inside you.
He slowly pulls out, leaving you feeling full and empty at the same time. Your chests falling and rising quickly against each other, the room still spinning as you come down from the high. After what feels like hours, he falls next to you on the hospital bed, chuckling to himself as he stares at the ceiling. "That was most definitely worth the wait." He whispers softly as he closes his eyes. You take off your glasses, wiping the sweat from your forehead. "I guess I really did need a doctor." You wink playfully as you both sit up, head going to rest against his shoulder. You knew you needed this kind of distraction from everything; the state of your sister had been taking a toll on you. Charlies places a gentle kiss to the top of your head, his lips lingering for a few seconds before he gets up. You follow behind, searching for the clothing you both hastily discarded. Once fully clothed, he holds the door open for you; the moment shared between you two forever imbedded into your minds, but the gentle clearing of a throat catches your attention. You turn around, facing a flustered Dr. Mayhew, his hair a mess, and his face flushed red with swollen lips. A complete mess. "So, Y/N... let me take you to a proper lunch, yeah?" You stop in your tracks, debating for a moment, the nervousness on his face clear as he waited for you to answer. "After that, how could I say no to lunch?" He laughs in relief, his arm snaking around your curvy waist. "Had me worried for a second-" Before he could finish, the intercom interrupts him "Paging Dr. Mayhew." You both look at each other, his hand falling away and he's off. “12:30 tomorrow, be ready!” He calls out as he rushes down the hallway, leaving you back to your thoughts, heat rising back to your face as you leave a flustered mess.
#plus size reader#nicholas chavez x reader#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas chavez x plus size reader#dr charlie mayhew x plus size reader#dr charlie mayhew#grotesquerie
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I think that traditional knowledge (using this term loosely, to mean any experience based knowledge that might be orally shared and/or passed down) is not just Science in a different form, nor is it a simpler, earlier stage of a developmental path toward Science, nor is it an inferior form of knowledge.
When you are an apprentice of Nature, constantly seeking Nature in your surroundings and intentionally OPENING YOUR EYES to what moves around you, knowledge accumulates in a slow drip, like water dripping from a stalactite.
Individual days and moments of observation pull together strands of the web of life that entangles you. One day I see this bird eating from this bush; one day I see this butterfly land on this flower; one day I see that this leaf catches fire more readily than that; every day I see organisms interacting with one another and their environment, I see new environments and new interactions of organisms, and slowly I begin to see the RELATEDNESS OF EVERYTHING, an understanding that is constantly completing and filling in and becoming deeper.
The scientific framework allows me to pinpoint these observations and pose hypotheses to myself which I can then intentionally investigate and attempt to falsify. It makes the process of gaining understanding more methodical and directed.
But formalized science investigates questions within little enclosures. The learning that happens in a scientific experiment is not only limited by the boundaries of the question being investigated and the exclusion of extraneous variables (which are of course, fundamentally important parts of science), but by the idea of Science as a specific activity that a person is either doing right now or not doing right now, like playing baseball.
A baseball player has times when he is playing baseball and times when he isn't. It's the same with most jobs and hobbies. So someone who is a Scientist might be tempted to have times when she is doing science and times when she isn't. The knowledge within her might therefore be tempted to have times when it is being developed and times when it isn't.
But my dad was a pastor. The nature of his job was not in the act of preaching a sermon (which can be done from an outline you got online—shouldn't, but can) but in preparing sermons, going to events, being around to answer questions, visiting sick people in the hospital, spending long hours in study seeking spiritual insight, spending time with the youth at arcades and roller-skating places and the like, being present, being.
Being a farmer is a lot similar. Your life is defined by your relationship with the life-forms you care for in a way that can never be shelved or set aside.
The traditional way of attaining knowledge and understanding of Nature is a RELATIONSHIP that is developed and deepened in every interaction between you and your LIVING surroundings
This means that you also cannot learn the ways of the plants by Going To a Specific Place that you consider to be Nature—you must realize that EVERYWHERE IS NATURE, and the endless movement, change, and chaos of life can be seen in the dandelion and spotted spurge of the sidewalk. Anywhere you see change that was not changed according to an Idea of how the space should be, but that happened according to forces outside of human purpose—a weed popping up in a lawn, a tree that was not planted, a planted shrub drying up and turning brown, mushrooms emerging after a rain, a tree blown down in a storm, a hillside eroding, a leaf being blown in the wind, the community of plants along a roadside or in a ditch—that's Nature, and She Will Teach You.
Learning is not a job—it is a relationship, so even when you go to the walmart, Nature will show you something in the cracks of the pavement and the sad parking lot trees
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Hey why DO all those old tabletop RPGS and adventure games have such weird obtuse "act in this one scene or softlock forever" moments? Like, these weren't designed like arcade games that munch quarters... Why was this sort of thing so commonplace?
(With reference to this post here.)
Funnily enough, for tabletop RPGs there's actually a good answer.
If you're familiar with the popular history of tabletop roleplaying games, you've probably heard the idea that they developed out of fantasy wargaming. That's not actually terribly accurate; tabletop RPGs and fantasy wargames are more like two parallel branches that split off from the recreating-historical-battles kind of wargaming at about the same time, and for the first couple of decades there wasn't a bright line drawn between them like there is today. Many are genuinely hard to classify by contemporary standards – there are a lot of early fantasy wargames that look more like modern tabletop RPGs, and vice versa.
One of the consequences of that lack of sharp distinctions between tabletop RPGs and fantasy wargames is that early tabletop RPGs were often played in a sort of "competitive co-op" format at wargaming tournaments. Multiple groups would run their parties through the same adventure in parallel, and be ranked on their performance; sometimes this would involve scoring points for completing specific objectives, or speedrunning the adventure and aiming for the fastest time, but the most popular tournament format was the survival module: adventures which were deliberately designed to be unreasonably difficult, with whichever group's last surviving character's corpse hit the ground furthest from the dungeon entrance being judged the winner.
The upshot of that popularity is that many published adventures early on – and certainly the greater part of the more infamous ones! – were originally written as survival modules, created to be run competitively at a particular tournament, and later repackaged and sold as commercial products. Of course, practically none of them actually explained that; like nearly all tabletop RPG material of their day, they were written under the assumption that all tabletop roleplayers had come up through organised play at university gaming clubs, and thus already had all the context I've just outlined. This ended up causing no end of confusion when the hobby's mainstream visibility exploded in the early 1980s, and suddenly there were folks who'd picked up the rulebooks at their local bookstores trying to teach themselves how to play from first principles with no prior contact with gaming club culture.
As for why adventure games were also like that... well, this is going to sound bizarre by contemporary standards, and I don't blame you if you don't believe me, but once upon a time, point-and-click adventure games were considered the gold standard for Serious Gaming. Unforgiving routing, bizarre moon-logic puzzles, and a bewildering variety of unique ways to get yourself killed off were held up as the mark of the serious gamer in much the same way that janky soulslike combat systems are today, and a large chunk of the genre was made to cater to that ethos. Gamer culture is a hell of a drug!
(If you're about to ask the obvious follow-up question, "what changed?", the point-and-click adventure game's fall from grace and subsequent dismissal as casual fluff tracks more or less directly with a large demographic shift in the late 1990s that saw the genre's player base skewing predominantly female – and, well, you can probably connect the dots from there.)
#gaming#tabletop roleplaying#tabletop rpgs#video games#game design#adventure games#violence mention#death mention#sexism mention#swearing
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Steve/Tony dating sim announcement & writer casting call!
The best part about a multiverse is all the different Steves and Tonys we get—and imagining them meeting. And kissing. And flirting. And maybe doing something a little spicier.
But why stick with imagining that when we can make it a reality? When we can make a Steve/Tony multiverse dating game?
That’s right, we’re making a game and it'll be free to play! What exactly does that entail? The Steve/Tony dating sim (name TBD. We’re all ears for any ideas you have) will be a visual novel-style game that’s mostly dialogue with some simple minigames thrown in. You get to play as a Steve or Tony from one of the many universes that exist who’s thrown into a rift in reality with a bunch of other Steves and Tonys. You’ll get to decide whom to work with to invent, fight, flirt, and date your way back home.
We’ll be sharing updates on the game development and launch on this Tumblr so make sure to follow us!
Who we are
The Steve/Tony dating sim team is made up of passionate Steve/Tony fans who have come together to write and illustrate the dating game of our dreams, coded by the wonderfully talented @v-thinks-on. You can read more about us here.
How this works
In order to make the game, we need writers for the player and love interest characters, artists for the visuals, and more. At this point, we’re looking specifically for love interest writers, but make sure to follow us as we’ll be looking for volunteers for other roles in the coming months!
Love interest writers can either work on their own or with a partner(s) to plot out and write a simple narrative arc and series of dates for a potential love interest character (a character that the player can choose to interact with and date). They construct the foundational beats for the story and dialogue for the love interest character, and they provide choices for player responses (you can indicate that the player can respond angrily, morosely, or happily to a certain line, but you’re not writing the player dialogue yourself). Later, player writers will insert responses to the existing love interest’s dialogue you wrote. It’s kind of like roleplay!
For example, your script may look something like this:
Tony616 “So, you’re a Steve, huh” If <angry response>: Tony616 “Sorry I asked” If <happy response>: Tony616 “You’re a cheerful one, eh?” [the player gets closer to Tony616]
To get a more detailed understanding of how this works, see this guide here. We’re also happy to answer any questions, and we have a Discord server where we brainstorm and talk as a group.
Existing love interest storylines (more to come later!)
The following characters have arcs that are outlined already, and their writers are looking for a partner to collaborate with. Here are short pitches to give you a sense of each character’s emotional journey through the game.
616 Tony
Iron Man V.1 128 Tony is newly sober for the first time and still hiding that he’s Iron Man. The player can either help Tony open up or drive him to drinking again.
1872 Tony
Pre-canon Tony has lost faith in humanity and himself. Will the player convince him to get back on his feet? Or will he think everyone's better off with him at the bottom of a bottle?
616 Steve
Avengers V4 Steve has just returned from the dead after his fight with his Tony about the Superhero Registration Act. He wants to trust Player, but can he?
MCU Steve
Post-2012 Avengers Steve is lost and doesn't know his place in the new century. Through his interactions with the player, he finds his home and purpose.
Don’t see a character you want to write for on this list?
You can volunteer to write any Steve or Tony you want! In fact, we actively want more Steves and Tonys. This is a multiverse dating sim, after all, so the more the merrier. Just contact us with the canon character you’re interested in writing for and whether you’d like to work solo or with a partner(s).
How to apply
Please email [email protected] with the following information:
Confirmation that you’re over 18 (just let us know you’re 18+; we’re not asking you to share personal info)
The best way(s) to contact you
What character you’d like to write for (universe and name). If you have multiple, please order by preference
Do you want to write alone or with a partner(s)?
A writing sample focusing on Steve and Tony (link or attachment), ideally with a good amount of dialogue. This doesn’t have to be a complete piece with a beginning, middle, and end; it's more to get a sense of your style and understanding of characterization, so all we ask is that it’s easy to follow. This can be something you’ve already written or you can write something new for this application. We don't have a minimum word requirement; if we need more from you, we'll let you know.
Contact us
Please don’t hesitate to contact us if you have any questions. You can reach us by email, Tumblr Messenger, askbox, Twitter DM, or Bluesky DM. Thank you!
#stevetony#steve/tony#stony#superhusbands#steve rogers#tony stark#fandom games#dating sim#stevetonydatingsim
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Dogman, how do you write SO WELL!?!? I love all your characters and I need to know what/where you find inspo from...
Ha. Every writer is just someone who apes the creative processes of their inspirations. For video game writing specifically, there's two answers for me.
Toby Fox is always gonna be a huge inspiration for me. I've written plots and characters before and had to abandon ideas after realizing I'd accidentally written part of UT again. Even some of the ideas I used were undeniably inspired by UT in a subconscious way and ofc, I included several explicit references to UT in my last series. Toby's a very clever guy who likely pays very close attention to the art he consumes and tries to figure out how to maximize how much his work connects with his audience. Whatever his process is, it works.
The other answer is a lil funnier: Scott Cawthon, but specifically the legend, not the man. For context: Back in the earlier days of the FNaF fandom, people had a hyper-inflated view of Scott Cawthon's writing skills that largely came from how little of a presence he had back in those days. In the vacuum of Scott actually explaining his own process in detail, people got caught up in his genuinely creative way of hiding exposition in his games using cryptid and (then) unexpected methods, and a narrative formed (one that he's since refuted.)
While he never implied it tmk, fans broadly believed that he constructed these sweeping and complex narratives with tons of cohesive moving parts, with the games essentially acting like the mere tip of his lore iceberg. People even thought he wrote so much that he had whole games worth of lore outlined from the beginning! In the first Dawko interview he gave, he clarified that this wasn't the case and explained roughly what his process was (basically just outlining rough theme ideas + aesthetics for future titles.)
However, that legend made younger-me's mind run wild and any time I wrote a story, it became very difficult for me to not keep writing down ideas while completing the grunt work that followed me finishing my scripts. When I finished DSaF 1, I already had DSaF 2's draft written and by the time 2 was done, I had enough lore for a 3rd game on paper (and a lot more stuff that I didn't use.) By the time three was out, I had pages upon pages of unused concepts/story ideas and more or less just had to decide to call it quits or else I'd be pumping out entries forever!
That's why if you go back to those older games, there's references that directly refer to future plot-points in pretty casual/easy to miss ways. (Like Henry's mention in DSaF 1, Dave being heartless in DSaF 2, Jack being soulless in 1, and even Blackjack being Jack's soul in 2. Most of 3's major plotpoints are implied somewhere in 2 and some of 2's in 1.)
DT is much the same. By the time I finished writing it, I had fairly detailed drafts for arcs for each of the characters, some early material ended up getting completely recontextualized (and even modified in small ways to not conflict with the wider ideas I came up with.)
I get really into writing my stories/characters and I always wonder exactly how things ended up where they are, what characters think about but don't say, etc etc. This is why I have an obscene amount of Crown lore that I have very little to do with rn (since he impacted the whole world so deeply.)
This extra stuff also includes plenty of sequel material ideas, though I didn't think I'd even get a chance to use them since DT performed pretty meagerly before the big release and I was expecting to have to move onto something new. Though it turned out that Scott didn't actually write his games this way (by his own admission), it's the correct answer for what my core writing inspiration for writing game narratives is.
Hope this helps!
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The Exposition Dump is a Myth (sort of)
There's a reason you're often told to avoid the exposition dump (kills the pacing of the scene, can be boring to read), but I might argue you never actually need it.
That’s because good exposition does two things:
1. It comes in the moment it is necessary
Backstory is told the very moment it is necessary information to tell, rather than to set up when it will be important. That means we don’t know what the neighbour does for work until we see her going to work. We don’t need to know about the town next over until we’re walking into it. We shouldn’t know about the bad things the mother has done until she’s right in front of us.
This is because information that doesn’t have direct relevance to readers is easier to forget and not that interesting. Every piece of exposition you share has to have direct, immediate relevance to the situation.
But better yet…
2. It’s shown through action and conflict
Good exposition isn’t told to the reader in a big chunk but rather explored through action or conflict. It can be as simple as this change:
“Mandy worked most of the day as a nurse at the local hospital.”
To
“Mandy rushed past him, dressed in her typical blue scrubs. She offered him weak smile, deep bags hanging under her eyes, before darting out the door and slamming it closed behind her.”
From this change we demonstrate the same info but in a more interesting way that ultimately reveals more about Mandy’s character. Plus, it trusts the reader to put together that Mandy is very busy at her job at a hospital rather than telling them directly.
Instead of telling the reader that the city is dangerous at night, catch them three blocks from their car as the sun quickly sets. Through action or conflict, we not only learn the information you want us to know, but we can explore who the character is based off how they act and react across different situations.
So, no, you don’t really need an exposition dump. If there is no point in your story where information comes up naturally in a moment it’s relevant and can be told through action or conflict—it’s probably unnecessary and could be cut out.
That being said, many works (even professionally published) use exposition dumps, and sometimes very well! So as always, it's up to the writer.
What are your thoughts on exposition?
#writing#writing community#writers#creative writing#screenwriting#writing inspiration#filmmaking#books#film#writing advice#exposition#exposition dump#writing exposition#The Exposition Dump is a Myth (sort of)
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hii can i request small hc’s of what kinks john wick has?
hi anon, thank you for the request, i hope i did justice :)
tbh i don’t think canon-typical jw is too kinky so i will keep this as “realistic” as possible. but if yall want more darkish mad kinky jw shoot an ask i will do part 2! <3 nsfw.
size kink.
he loves loves loves how small you are compared to him, and your height and weight don’t change a damn thing because he is just so tall and muscular that he manhandles you either way. he looses his mind when during specific positions he can see your belly bulge slightly and he can spot the faint outline of his dick, putting his large palms on it to feel himself. he absolutely gets off on how your frame clings to him for support in any situation, intimate or not. he just loves that he can wrap himself around you and basically shield you from everyone and everything. he loves being your protector.
slight choking.
he would refuse to do anything that can potentially harm you so he would much rather you choke him. of course even if you put your whole strength and energy into the act you wouldn’t really be able to do much than “slight” choking. but it gets him turned on either way. the blood momentarily rushes to his groin when he feels your soft hands wrap around his neck. he indulges in this mostly because he let’s himself be vulnerable and exposed to you which makes him feel human. and you are the only person he trusts so it is done on emotional level too in a sense.
hair pulling.
if you have longer hair he might tug on it every now and then, but he finds it degrading to pull your hair to the point that it might hurt. but when you do it? he would groan and whimper like a teenager. he loves when you pull him hard by his hair to guide his head when he is buried in between your thighs. your wish was his command anyway, but when your fingers are grabbing his soft raven hair, he would burn down the whole world if you asked.
breeding.
oh my god.
if you two are having unprotected sex and you don’t want children yet or ever, he won’t ever pressure you into indulging in a breeding act. he knows it’s too risky and he respects you and your body.
if you are on some form of birth control, he might actually feel himself going insane. he would fill you up so much, again and again, not letting a drop go to waste. at some point you think the pill won’t do a justice with the frequency john spends his load in you.
©️feinv, 2024.
#john wick#john wick fanfic#john wick smut#john wick x fem!reader#john wick x reader#john wick x you#john wick fanfiction#john wick 2#john wick 3#john wick chapter 4#john wick drabbles#john wick x fem reader#john wick imagine#feinv—jw
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A Violation of Two Amendments
If you’ve seen a lot of posts online about KOSA, it’s because it has the potential to drastically change the internet.
The Kids Online Safety Act (KOSA) is a proposed bill receiving U.S. Democratic and Republican support.
It pulls on strong concerns about the safety of children, especially the fabricated concerns of LGBT+ topics propagandized by conservatives. It would permit the government to censor the internet at will, restricting what information is available online for everyone, even people in other countries.
The bill would permit attorneys general to prevent basic information about healthcare, mental health, world news, and more from being accessible online, keeping adults as well as children from finding important information and resources.
There are valid concerns about the internet and its ability to harm people, especially children. I have written a thesis specifically about the relationships between mental health and social media. In no way would I ever advocate for increased censorship in the way that this bill does.
It specifically violates the First Amendment of the Constitution, inserting governmental control over people’s speech, the sharing of news, and the sharing of opinions. This would be placing the responsibility of parenting on the government, and allowing them to determine exactly what children -and adults- are allowed to learn.
Furthermore, it is disguised as a bill to ‘protect children’, and that phrase itself has unfortunately become a dog whistle for conservatives referring to LGBT+ topics existing in the world. This bill is extremely dangerous to young LGBT+ individuals.
It is also dangerous to people of different races, nationalities, economic backgrounds, and gun owners. This is because it would virtually mandate age verification. This poses danger for children, people facing domestic abuse, and houseless people, as well as violating the Fourteenth Amendment, which asserts that the state cannot exert undue control over its citizens’ private lives.
Many organizations and websites have initiated petitions and calls to action to express disapproval of this bill, outlining its rights violations, and helping individuals find out how to contact their senators. Some of those resources are linked below.
Additional Resources
1.https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2024/02/dont-fall-latest-changes-dangerous-kids-online-safety-act
2. https://www.stopkosa.com/
3.https://www.change.org/p/save-our-free-and-open-internet-stop-the-kids-online-safety-act4. https://actionnetwork.org/petitions/censorship-wont-make-kids-safe?nowrapper=true
#KOSA#kosa bill#stop kosa#politics#us politics#anonymity#privacy#activism#internet safety#homophobia#14th amendment#1st amendment#news
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Hunch Punch T. Fushiguro
Sneak peak of the Enemies to lovers series and inspired by that tik tok trending sound “come here bae come sit next to me, DAMN YOU ON THE EDGE OF THE BED YOU BOUT TO FALL OFF”
Toji had promised Shiu that he’d be on his best behavior and that he wouldnt bother you. He promised no more witty remarks, no shit talking, no more of him being— him. All because little megumi loved spending time with you and avoiding Toji meant every extension of him unfortunately for little megs too. And the little brat had his death stare down to perfection it was why he had two killer dogs.
You weren't oblivious at all to Tojis stares though, specifically to the way his eyes would roam your curves or even your ass when he thought you werent looking. the floor to ceiling window of the one way hotel window had perfectly outlined his wide muscular frame and the minute you turn around his eyes avert from your frame sk quickly you almost thought you imagined it.
Lets see how well tamed he actually is?
“Hows megs?”you ask and his brows furrow for a second and he almost ask whos that because his only thoughts was that thin tiny piece of fabric that was backless showing your spine tattoo, tiny enough for you to bend over and fry his brain and thin enough to where he could see your nipples— were those nipple piercings?
Oh fuck.
“Good. Hes soo goo—“ and he stops himself in his tracks no he wasnt. “No. hes… he misses you” he shakes his head running a hand through his jet black silky hair before dragging a hand down his face.
You pout sitting down on the bed the scent of your perfume overwhelming and he has to bite his tongue to hold back one of his sly comments thats just on the tip of his lips. He clears his throat at the way you lean forward your breast pressing further into the fabric and he feels his hand grip the soft sheets tighter.
“You okay Toji?” You ask softly but your voice sounds like a goddamn siren calling out her prey he’d never heard that tone and the way you said his name has his knuckles aching from the grip.
“Your ears are red” you giggle and this man was so down bad for you so when your hand reaches out to trail from the top of the shell of his ear to the bottom he shivers grabbing your hand in a tight grip.
When his eyes look over at you your licking your lips the shiny gloss never moving from your pink thick lips.
“Are you?” His voice rasp you acted like you hated him any other time but right now it felt like he was being seduced and damn did he want to fold… and then fold you. There was only one way youd act like this.
“What were you drinking?” He ask arching a brow before you giggle again pulling your hand from his wrist.
“I had two shots… Don Julio act a foolio.” You smile and he sees the way your tongue runs over your sharp teeth. Not enough to have you drunk or even tipsy but enough for him to move further from you on the bed to the edge.
“Mmcht why you all the way over there” you suck your teeth, But its the low lided look in your eyes that has him stuck. You had mentioned something before about scorpios having a certain look they give you that locks you in a trance and he thought it was some stupid zodiac thing until he fealt nearly paralized.
“You on the edge of the bed you ‘bout to fall off” you smirk watching the wheels in his head completely stop turning and fall off track his pupils blown wide as you crawl over to him straddling his lap.
Oh, fuck megumi! the little brat hated him anyways the minute your hand touches his chest, behaving so you could come back over for megumi was over. And fuck Shiu too.
“Having fun mama?” He ask spreading his legs wider, hands coming to stabilize you quickly by your hips but fingers tips grazing the top of your ass. He doesn’t even flinch when you pull the gun from his hip dismantling all 6 pieces. The bullets clinking as they fall onto the hardwood floor.
“Keep letting your hands wander might find something else” he leans forward slightly until your hand presses into his throat making the air thicken more. His eyes wander down between the two of you drinking in every inch of you perched perfectly in his lap and he really wasn’t sure who trapped who.
“I thought you Told Shiu you were going To behave?” You tease this time using your opposite hand to caress his face slowly pulling it up to you.
“Sweetheart, this is me behaving” he chuckles his hand reciprocating yours on your neck pulling you down so his lips are against your ear your eyes fluttering shut.
“If i wasnt…” his thumb presses gently against your pressure point in your neck “id have you ride my tongue until the only thing you can remember is my fucking name.”
And your spun around so your back is up against his firm chest, buldge noticeable against your ass legs dangling on the outside of his. His hand holds your neck in place to make sure youre watching him in the reflection in the window.
“If i wasnt i wouldve ripped this slutty little dress off you and had you pinned to that window fucking so deep inside of you until theres tears” his fingers start to slide under your dress.
“ until youre begging and dont know what youre begging me for: to cum, to go faster to stop or let you breathe” his hands squeezes Around your throat tighter tongue against your ear with a soft groan that you almost miss.
“Until those pretty eyes roll back so far you cant give me the look you’ve been giving me all night” he smirks against your neck pulling your gun and knife both from under your dress dismantling it the same way you did his before returning back to your thighs thumb curling against your black lace thong. He doesnt comment on the wetness just tightens his grip on your neck.
“If youre going to try and kill me be less obvious” he snaps the lace against your clit loving the way you flunch back onto his hard on. He knew you were dangerous but fuck this was the sexiest way anybodys ever tried to kill him. He knew youd never drink on a job nor wear something that revealing but he loved being seduced by you he couldn't lie.
The way you were glairing at him had him smirking because you still looked so fucking sexy and your eyes still had that slightly seductive yet hypnotizing look.
“Get off me” you hiss though your body shows no fight or signs of wanting to get off him. You werent in distress in the slightest. Not a drop of fear in you when your neck was in the hands of a man who could literally snap it easily if he wanted.
“I can feel how wet you are f’ me mama. You dont want me to ‘get of you’ you want me to get you off” he chuckles cupping your pussy smirking at you through your reflections watching your eyes flutter when his thumb brushes against your clit.
“You comin’ home with me after this… the brat misses you” he purrs in your ear making you nod when he pushes a thick finger inbetween your wet folds soaking his finger up with a squish.
“Okay baby?” He needs confirmation before loosing his mind in between your legs.
“Not your b-baby” you stutter at the thrust. “But ill come—“ and he thrust further this time cutting your words off.
See megs, you can have your cake and eat it too
“I know you will mama, imma make sure you cum for me” he laughs biting on your neck listening to your soft moan and instantly knowing he’d be down bad for you, how hooked he’d be to hear that sound again.
Shit if he was going to be down bad so were you.
“Let me taste you”
#jjk smut#fushiguro toji#toji x reader#toji fushiguro#toji zenin#toji smut#toji x black reader#toji x black y/n#toji x black oc#toji x black mc#toji x you#toji x y/n#toji x oc
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I'm back to frequently thinking about a Transformers AU for SVSSS, because I love trying to fuse the worldbuilding (working across several different continuities of TF, admittedly) into something recognizable to both worlds that's also new. I also love pulling on the elements these worlds have in common: immortal beings, endless conflicts, switching bodies, cores of power, building yourself up to become a higher being, oppressive systems controlling entire worlds, people (characters) who were constructed and are discarded for specific purposes (profit and sometimes just entertainment) and are not always viewed as real people, the creator god might be just some guy over there, and so on.
For this AU, my story outline currently sticks to Cybertron and its surrounding space. I don't have any characters whom I want to make human, I have very specific backgrounds in mind for everyone already, and I have a plotline that doesn't require Earth or humans in any way. Though, for fun, I was absentmindedly fiddling with the idea of taking the characters of a different MXTX story (MDZS or TGCF) and making them into the humans of this AU.
I feel like Wei Wuxian would be one of those human characters who is basically already climbing into the seat before a transformer can finish introducing themselves as a giant space robot; oh, he is DOWN for whatever the fuck this is. However, if I was writing Wei Wuxian as a human in a TF AU, I don't know which SVSSS character I would pair him with as his "partner", as I personally would be far more interested in writing a story in which Lan Wangji and/or Wen Ning (both?) are Cybertronians. (Yes, obviously, Wei Wuxian would be a robotfucker for LWJ.) I'm leaning more towards Wen Ning, because there's the "I rebuilt this guy and turned him into an abomination who acts kind of in service to me" aspect, and also it's funny to imagine human Lan Wangji having to put up with his boyfriend's alien car being a part of the relationship.
With TGCF, making the characters into the humans of a TF AU for SVSSS feels like a reversal. Xie Lian's narrative everything arguably makes him an even better Cybertronian than any other MXTX character. The fall from being, say, a Prime and the Bearer of the Matrix to apparently being some poorly-maintained bot that spends its time picking up trash on Earth in the aftermath of some Cybertronian war? Delicious. Hua Cheng was some half-broken, half-starving, outlier freak, MTO discard saved by the new Prime EIGHT MILLION YEARS AND SEVERAL WARS AGO, and has never gotten over it and never will. And a lot of the other TGCF characters also match very nicely to TF worldbuilding: mmm, my brain likes chewing on the image of beautiful and terrifying, near-immortal robots falling from the "heavens". It's even easy to source internal TGCF characters as the humans if you need human characters, so there's no real need to make it into a crossover with MDZS or SVSSS.
So, ultimately, this TF AU for SVSSS is not going to be a crossover. I don't want it to be. But I did enjoy thinking about TF AUs for MDZS and TGCF as well, where the worldbuilding or character arcs fit nicely together, so I wanted to share that here.
#tossawary svsss#fic ideas#svsss transformers au#tossawary tgcf#tossawary mdzs#wei wuxian#wen ning#lan wangji#wangxian#xie lian#hua cheng#hualian#tossawary transformers
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white noise / track 1: st. patrick
pairing: lee seokmin x afab! reader
series summary: your best friend seokmin has always been there for you. after a particularly rough heartbreak, you find out he's there for you in more ways than just one.
series notes: uni!au, best friends to lovers, friends with benefits, kpop 97 line antics and shenanigans (specifically seventeen & loona), 18+ (smut is outlined/warned beforehand)
chapter notes: alcohol mention and consumption, house party setting, smut!!! (oral sex [afab receiving], protected sex, small insecurity mention), mingyu being pouty, yves being a terrible wingwoman, minghao being the king he is, to my jaehyun lovers i'm so sorry, this is for the orbits for the pain that we've been through
wc: 7.2k (still can't believe i wrote this much)
a/n: i've teased bringing this back a lot and this series still means so much to me, even though it still sits unfinished lol. this first track especially. and if it weren't the support (& excitement) of @onlyseokmins, idk if i ever would've reposted it. so this is for you bb <3 please let me know what you think in the tags or send in asks, i'd love to hear your thoughts! <33
“What do you think about this?”
You look over at your friend, her figure adorning a velvet tube top with loose white cloth pants, an outfit that’s comfortable and light for a steamy college party and yet accentuates her curves enough to show off. Any sane person would tell Yves that she would be the center of attention as soon as she walks through the door, having everyone question if they wanted to be her or be with her.
“It looks good,” you respond with a nonchalant shrug, going back to aimlessly scrolling on your phone, surrounded by a multi-chrome array of clothes.
You were clearly not the sane person in that scenario.
Yves turns to you, exasperated at your attitude. “Dude, you’ve been so boring since you got your heart broken by Jaehyun.”
“I did not get my heart broken.”
“Really? Because you’re acting like the second lead who just got dumped in a drama.”
“Your outfit and you are hot, like always! Is that what you wanted to hear,” a small chuckle leaves your lips as you stand up from the bed. “Anyways, I’m not heartbroken, just upset.”
You look over your outfit in the floor-length mirror of the room, your black booties standing out against your mid-wash jean shorts. As you play with your cardigan, your mind wanders to Jaehyun and the ghost of a fling, fleeting and indescribable to anyone not close to you. You begin to wonder how he describes you to his close confidantes, if the small cafe dates and late night study sessions in the library were described with care or if all that mattered were the rushed bedroom antics, leaving you with just a memory and an “I think we should see other people” text message.
“Take this off. I know you and you’re going to get hot,” Yves wakes you from your daze, pulling your cardigan off your body, revealing your black cropped tank, “This is a better outfit anyway. We’re going to a party, not one of Haseul’s opera recitals.” She joins you in the mirror, a small smile gracing her face as she assesses your outfit. “Much better. Plus, this,” she gestures to your figure, “will help you get laid.”
You roll your eyes. “What are you talking about?”
“You know what they say! To get over someone, you have to get under someone new.”
Looking at Yves, her pride evident in her stance and a mischievous gleam in her smile, you were sure of one thing. “You’re absolutely mental.”
“You know I’m right,” Yves insists. “One way to quickly get over someone is to have sex with someone else. I’ve done it.” Her shameless approach on the topic bleeds through her demeanor, her shoulder sitting low on her upper body as she sits on her bed and one of her legs drapes across the other. Just as you were about to respond to her, your phone buzzes in your back pocket, distracting you and Yves from the current conversation.
LADS ‼️💯‼️
seokmin: ya’ll going to the party tn?
haseul: can’t :/ have the late night shift at the library
mingyu: booooo tomato tomato
minghao: and what happened to fuck capitalism?
haseul: try telling our landlord that
minghao: fair enough
yn: yves and i are going!
seokmin: jinsoul?
jinsoul: social battery is pretty low, so i’m probably going to stay home
mingyu: BOOOOO tomato tomato 🍅🍅🍅 i'm throwing tomatoes!
yves: leave her alone gyu!
jinsoul: i’m not getting you coffee before class anymore for that
minghao: lmao good job gyu
yn: he will be his own downfall
mingyu: :(
seokmin: anyways the boys and i will see yall there!
seokmin: do you need a ride?
yves: we’re taking an uber!
minghao: good. stay safe!
Yves looks up from her phone and looks at you with a playful smirk pulling at her lips. “You know what I just thought was a great idea.”
With her track record, it’s probably not a good idea.
“You should hook up with Seokmin.”
It definitely wasn’t a good idea. “Okay, now I know you’ve lost your mind.”
“You can’t tell me that you haven’t thought about it.”
You can’t deny that you haven’t thought about how your best friend would treat you in the bedroom. You would get lost in your head, thinking about how his arms had gotten toned after his recent workout sessions and how those same arms would hold you down as he made you reach cloud nine. Many would cringe at the mere thought, but with how close you and Seokmin were and how much time you two spent together, people thinking you were at least hooking up wasn’t uncommon, your cheeks getting hot any time it’s brought up. His eyes would get wide with that same sweet smile, the red flush on his ears disappearing quickly. You’d never cross that boundary just to get over a silly boy; your friendship means much more to you than a quickie.
“Just because I might’ve thought about it, doesn’t make it something that needs to happen. I’m not that desperate,” you double down on your stance, grabbing your phone to check the status of your Uber, finding any excuse to escape this conversation. The thin black line stating your driver was more than 5 minutes away, you mentally curse at whoever was upstairs who enjoys watching you suffer at the hands of Yves.
“Please, have you seen how buff he’s getting! Those arms?” a sly grin blooming on her face, she looks over at you expectantly as if you would agree with her. You do, but you’d never let her know that. Instead of entertaining her antics, you grab your personal bag, ready to leave for the night.
“Okay, you’re done. Let’s go,” you say, pulling Yves from the bed, “the Uber is almost here.”
Walking through the door of the frat house, the humidity in the air makes your shirt stick to your chest like a second skin. The packed bodies only add to the warmth inside the cramped house, you silently thank Yves for making you take off your cardigan, the couple years of your friendship proving that she knows you better than you think. She hugs your backside, keeping you close as you move through the mass of people, looking for your group of friends.
“Do you know if they’re here yet?” you hear Yves’ voice, yelling above the crowd from behind you and almost blending into the music.
You respond, bringing your face close to her ear, “Yeah, Seokmin texted me saying they were!” She nods in acknowledgment, eyes scanning the immediate area. It’s hard to miss a man towering over the crowd, his signature black hair striking against his tan skin making him stand out as he takes a sip from his red solo cup near the kitchen. Two other men stand close to him, donning similar red plastic cups, one with a bright smile that easily lights up the room, shining with the fluorescent blues and purples of the house, and the other boy making his mark with a messy mullet and trademark style that defines his frame. Even if you hadn’t recognized the trio as your best friends, you would’ve instantly taken notice, the boys immediately attracting your attention.
“I found them!” you announce to Yves, who’s still close behind you, clinging to your arm as if her life depended on it. Grabbing her hand, you move through the crowd, not caring whose toes you stepped on or if people didn’t hear your ‘excuse us!’. It wasn’t long before you met with the trio of men, their faces lighting up as soon as they took notice of your presence and Mingyu pulling you in for a suffocating hug.
“You finally made it!” Mingyu’s breath is hot against you as he yells over the noise, still keeping you close even after the hug was long done, his arms tucking you underneath him. His chin decides to rest on your head and naturally finding its place as his arms wrap around your figure. At first glance, people may think that the two of you were an item, but Mingyu was just close with anyone he knew, finding any reason to hug his close friends.
“You’re lucky we made it all, hell, with how many people are here!”
“We were talking about moving to the backyard once you got here. Did you guys want a drink first?” Minghao is the one to speak up, looking at you and Yves through his bangs, bringing his red solo cup to his lips.
A groan breaks through the air, Yves grabbing his hand as she responds, “Yes, please. I definitely need it.”
Surprisingly, the kitchen is less crowded than the common areas of the house, bodies not congregating in the area once they make their drinks. You feel instant relief, the air conditioning hitting your skin, even a nice breeze from the back door giving you much needed fresh air. The group makes their way to the kitchen island, an array of liquor, beer, and mixers lining the surface, making the workspace nonexistent. Mingyu works with what he has though, his hands moving with diligence and ease as he acts as the group’s personal bartender for the night - just like every group gathering before.
“Hey!”
Turning towards the voice, you’re met with Seokmin, his dark hair falling against his tan skin and a smile so big that the skin near his eyes smile along with him, still sparkling with the bright party lights. Your heart grows warm seeing your best friend, the energy around him bursting with sunshine and love that anyone can feel when they enter his presence. You return his smile and saddle up to his side. Your shoulders touch as the two of you watch Mingyu mix drinks for you and Yves, who joins you and Seokmin, sitting on the kitchen counter next to him.
“I haven’t gotten to ask you, how are you doing since…” Seokmin’s words trail off and you look at him, concern etched in his face.
“Since Jaehyun? I’m not made of glass, you know. We can talk about him.”
Yves chimes in, “Don’t act like you weren’t crying about how unloveable you were just two days ago,” her snark ever prevalent in her tone.
“Anyways!” you retort, moving your attention back to Seokmin, “I’m fine. It was just a little fling, not a big deal.”
“It’s ok to be sad. You really liked him.” Seokmin flashes you a sincere smile, so pure, so full of light, the party seems to be worth it all from this little interaction. It’d been a while since you left your cave, only earthing to join the weekly movie night with everyone. Every time you wanted to hide away underneath your sheets, when you wanted your world to be blackness, when you wanted the world to swallow you whole, Seokmin was always there, the light at the end of your tunnel, pulling you out.
“Well, we’re not being sad tonight,” Mingyu interrupts your daze, handing you a miniature plastic cup, the same shot-sized reusable cups that were on the counter for reckless decisions like this one. “We’re here to forget about Jaehyun and enjoy our friends. Ones we know won’t leave us high and dry.” He holds his cup up to the ceiling, everyone following suit. “To our friendship!”
The clear liquid burns in your throat and you can feel it travel down your body, a chill tingling up your spine. Your nights that usually start with vodka shots don’t end too well, you think.
Cheers to you finding out what this night has in store.
A breeze wafts into the air, tripping you up and the ball you just threw blowing away with it.
“That’s not fair! The wind affected the throw!”
“Doesn’t matter! We discussed the rules before we started!”
A pout forming on your face, you stand back, giving Seokmin room for his turn. He turns to you, giving you a small pat on your lower back, muttering a soft ’it’s okay’ before his concentration is back on the five red cups laid in front of him on the table. His eyes are focused, his face still as he brings his hand up to aim, lining up his shot. The air was silent, the group paying close attention to his actions, watching him take his shot. The world seems to stop as he lets go of the plastic ball, everyone quiet until it reaches the rim of a plastic cup, toying with your emotions until it finally dips into the cup with a resounding plop.
You scream and wrap your arms around Seokmin, giddy with excitement as giggles fill the air. You don’t even care that there were still 3 cups to a victory and neither did Seokmin as he lifted you in the air, making your world dizzy. He held you tight, keeping you tucked into him even after he set your two feet back on the ground, his arms hugging you and taking place on your shoulders.
“I don’t know why Y/N is celebrating, they’ve missed every one of their shots!” Mingyu taunts, clearly trying to get under your skin.
Before you can respond, Seokmin speaks up, “Hey! We’re closer to winning than you! And that’s bold coming from you when Yves is clearly carrying your team.”
Mingyu gets quiet at that, Yves not even able to defend her teammate, just turns to him with a sympathetic pat on his arm before lining up to take her shot. Minghao, who’s leaning comfortably on the back wall of the house, chuckles, only staying quiet once Mingyu shoots him a death glare.
Looking up at Seokmin, you pout with a small whisper, “Am I that bad?”
“What? No! Also, who cares? It’s just beer pong.” He leaves the comfort of your touch to grab the ping pong balls from the grass, both missed by Yves and Mingyu.
“I care! For my ego.” You know he’s trying to make you feel better, trying to make sure you don’t take Mingyu’s competitive nature to heart like you tend to do. It is just beer pong. But the phrase “The more you drink, the better you are at beer pong” has exceptions and you may be one of them, the alcohol coursing through your system not helping whatsoever.
A playful smirk appears on Seokmin’s face as he says, “Would it hurt your ego if I helped you out with your form?”
You look at Seokmin through your lashes, your pout turning into a coy smile and a flirtatious lilt coming out of your tone. “No, I don’t think so.”
When Seokmin hands you the ping pong ball, he takes position behind you, lifting your hand with his, the other holding to your waist tightly. His breath was hot against your face, his voice soft and nurturing, tickling your ears, “You want to keep your wrist loose and have it high to start. It’s easier to aim from high above.”
It could be the alcohol talking, but having Seokmin this close, this intimate, had you thinking that maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea to have him tangled in your sheets. The same caramel voice that was coaching you through your terrible beer pong skills, the same voice that calls you late at night to make sure you’ve made it home safely, that same voice would be coaxing you to your high, having you come apart from his words alone.
It’s definitely just the alcohol talking, you think. You hope that’s the case, anyway.
“Once you get an aim, you’ll want to let go and follow through with your throw.” Seokmin leads you in the motion he described, still keeping you close. With your confidence now elevated, the air still, and everyone quietly watching, you let go of the ball and follow its arc as it sinks into a center cup.
Pride lights your smile aglow, your first instinct to reach Seokmin for a hug in a small celebration. His grip on you is tight as he hugs you back, his eyes showering you with admiration.
“I knew you could do it.”
“I only made that shot because of you.”
You glance over at the other side of the table. With a knowing smirk on Yves’ face, she keeps her eyesight towards the ground, preparing for her next turn.
You won’t be hearing the end of it from her.
You lean against the folding chair you’ve taken refuge in, a sweet breeze coming in, slightly lifting the jacket that’s draped across your shoulders. Smoke from the small fire in front of you makes your eyes sting, tears filling the corners. Bringing the cup you have to your lips, a clear line of separation from the ice that has melted and the alcoholic coke visible, you shudder at the taste and hand the cup back to Mingyu. “This party is kinda boring.”
“Oh, is beating us at beer pong not enough fun for you?”
“You’re starting to sound like a sore loser, Gyu,” Minghao chimes in, nursing his own screwdriver next to you. He keeps his puff jacket unzipped, letting the heat from the fire warm him up from the chill of the night air.
“So what if I am? Yves didn’t do all that work for nothing.”
“Speaking of Yves, where is she?” You never saw her slip away from the group, the atmosphere missing her snark and light attitude, but you’re only met with shrugs from the two men in front of you.
“She mentioned meeting with ViVi, don’t know if she ever found her.” The voice comes from behind you with a hand meeting your shoulder, the touch not unwelcomed, recognizing it to be Seokmin. “I’m assuming she has because she’s been gone for awhile.”
Just as Seokmin rejoins the group, a fresh drink in hand, your phone buzzes on your lap with the screen illuminating your face, looking at the text.
yves: leaving with vivi, don’t wait up <3
yves: also, don’t think we won’t be talking about seokmin later
yves: 😉
yn: we won’t be talking about him bcs nothing is nor will happen
yves: keep telling yourself that
You tune yourself out of your conversation with Yves, exhausted from the few text messages and her persistence. Turning your attention back to the group, leaning your head against Seokmin’s arm. “Yves just texted me. She left with ViVi.”
“Of course she did. I’m surprised it took her this long to make a move,” Minghao comments. The fire was now burning stronger, embers flying through the space only to land softly on the concrete. “How long has she been talking to her, anyway?”
“About 3 months now,” Mingyu answers.
“Damn… She must really like her.”
“Yeah, she never waits that long if it’s just a hookup. Even if I wanted to take someone out, I don’t think I’d wait that long.”
Minghao's eyes flicker to Seokmin, something on the edge of understanding and comfort, almost like he was sympathizing with him. Something you might have noticed if you weren’t resting on Seokmin’s hips, eyes closed as he rubs small circles on your shoulder. Something you would ask Seokmin about if you had seen. The look leaves as quickly as it came, Minghao’s face leans downcast, lips pursed as if he was holding his thoughts in.
Seokmin’s face leans close to your ear, soft and inviting as he speaks, “You getting tired?”
“Not really. Just bored,” sighing, you look up at Seokmin, meeting his eyes. “Kind of want to go home.”
“Let me take you back, make sure you get home safe. I’ll get us an Uber.”
“You just got your drink! I don’t want to end your night early.” You give Seokmin a gentle smile, a small appreciative gesture at his care. He was always taking care of you, always by your side, always giving himself to you. You wanted him to enjoy his night not worrying about you, at the very least.
Suddenly, Seokmin is walking to Mingyu, handing his cup over to the man sitting on the concrete, engulfed in conversation with Minghao. He announces his departure, telling the boys to make sure to get to their shared apartment safely and let him know when they do. Then, he’s walking back to you, grabbing your hand with such kindness, such care, before he’s looking at you expectantly.
“Let’s go.”
Your keys clinking fill the dead space as you enter your apartment, making sure to hold the door open, inviting Seokmin to follow you. He’s been here many times, whether it was alone or with your group of friends. The apartments shared between the seven of you had an open-door policy, welcoming heartbreaks, laughs, boredom, and overall debauchery with wide arms and open cabinets. Seokmin didn’t ask any questions when he walked into your apartment last week and saw you left alone in the darkness, nursing a bowl of your comfort instant ramen, your body hidden underneath an oversized blanket. You didn’t ask any questions when he joined you in your reality tv show marathon, grabbing a blanket from your ottoman, letting the fabric swallow him whole when he settled on your couch. Neither of you said anything, sitting in a comfortable silence, your brains turned off from the stress of the week.
He knew he didn’t need to ask anything; he knew you would come to him eventually, when you were ready.
He secretly hoped your heart would do the same.
“Did you want a drink?” your voice brings Seokmin back to reality. You were at your fridge, pulling out transparent green glass bottles. “I know you didn't get to finish yours earlier.”
“I thought you were tired,” Seokmin ignores the question, instead looking at you incredulously.
After you open the bottles, you bring the cold bubbly liquid to your lips, walking across your kitchen island to bring Seokmin the other. “I said I was bored, not tired. There was nothing to do, just a lot of loud drunk kids.”
“That’s most frat parties, you know.”
“Yeah. I don’t know why I keep letting Yves drag me to them,” you sigh, staring past Seokmin but not focusing on anything in particular.
“How about we play a game or something? Never have I ever?”
“You already know most everything about me! What fun would that be?”
“I bet there’s some things I don’t know about you!” While you and Seokmin had known each other since freshman year, spending most of your time together, you kept yourself guarded. Only letting Seokmin in when you were comfortable, prepared for the onslaught of judgment - which never came. Seokmin had been nothing but understanding, a warm breeze in an otherwise cold world. “How about we play 20 questions?”
You purse your lips, letting the beer bottle settle on your countertop as you think over Seokmin’s proposition. “Fine.”
“What was your first impression of me?”
You giggle to yourself, settling on your rug in the living room, thinking back to when you first met Seokmin during freshman orientation. Your knees touch his, bumping into each other as you reminisce. “What was my first impression of the goofball who followed me around like a lost puppy?”
Seokmin laughs, lighting up the room, making happiness bubble to the surface of your skin. You join in his laughter as he says, “Hey! Two lost people is better than one! Would you have not wanted me to follow you around because look at us now!”
“You’re right. Who knew that little goofball would end up being one of the best people in my life?”
“Remember during the social, Mingyu busted his ass trying to show up Minghao at b-boying?”
“Yeah and we had to help him nurse his ego in the dorm hallway?”
You and Seokmin had been inseparable that weekend, from his first awkward “Do you know where the Admin building is?” to your last “I guess I’ll be seeing you around campus”, you two finding your way back to each other come the first semester. With you two living in adjacent dorm buildings, it was easy to catch up for lunch, walk each other to class and meet in the communal study rooms. Mingyu happened to live in the same building as Seokmin and Jinsoul was your freshman year roommate. Soon, your group during the lunch break grew to include Haseul, Minghao, and Yves and solidified during sophomore year. They all held a special place in your heart, but none like Seokmin and they all knew it. Life was easier with Seokmin; midterms never seemed as difficult with his guiding light, heartbreaks never felt as lonely with his warmth and bad decisions never were so irreversible with his love.
Seokmin was and will always be your home — your light at the end of the tunnel.
The laughter between you two dies down, an easy silence falling in the air. It isn’t until you calm down that you ask the next question, “Okay my turn.” You bring a serious expression to your face, shifting the tone from the previous lighthearted atmosphere. “Is it better to love & lose or never love at all?”
“Oh, you’re getting philosophical on me now?”
“No better time than at 1 am on a Friday night, tipsy with my best friend.”
You see Seokmin slightly wince, something that happens in a blink of an eye before it’s replaced with a pensive expression, his lips jutting out in thought. You don’t have time to point it out before he’s answering, “Isn’t it better to love & lose? I mean, what’s a world without love?” You think on his words, albeit too long as he voices, “Why? Do you feel different?”
“Personally… yeah,” you mutter. You speak a little louder, confiding to Seokmin, “It might be everything that happened with Jaehyun but I can’t see how I can be thankful for giving him my love.”
“You… loved him?” Seokmin murmurs quietly, unable to mask his surprise.
“Not exactly, but is it embarrassing how fast I fell for him?”
No…” Seokmin trails off, his lips in a thin line, almost like he’s trying to keep himself from saying something he wants to. It’s faint, but you notice.
“What do you want to say?”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re hiding something.”
“No I’m not,” he repeats, adamant.
“Yes you are!” you smile before continuing, “C’mon, just tell me!” You begin to poke Seokmin’s side, a prominent offensive move in your arsenal. Seokmin giggles, trying to move away from the stimulation of your jabs, but is unsuccessful as you reach over and begin your attacks on his left side.
“Y/N stop!” His demand comes out broken as he tries to catch his breath, unable to break his fits of laughter.
“Not until you tell me what you’re hiding!”
Your assault continues, your giggles getting louder, probably annoying your neighbors. Neither of you are able to catch your breath, until Seokmin suddenly grabs hold of your wrists, bringing your back to the cushion of your rug, effectively pinning you to the ground.
Your laughter dies, the room becoming dead silent, only your ragged breaths filling the air. Your chest is heaving, your lungs trying to catch the precious air around you. With Seokmin straddling your waist, it isn’t until your breathing finally slows do you realize that his face is inches away from yours. His breath is audible, face red from the commotion.
You’ve never really looked at Seokmin this close, his mole standing out on his cheek. You notice every pore, every freckle and every line, all of it accumulating into the beauty of his face. His eyes are soft as he looks at you. The tension is unmistakably palpable, making your skin hot underneath his touch. You glance down at his lips, the curves and various shades of pink accentuating against his tan skin.
Before you can think much about it, you’re suddenly kissing him.
And just as quick, he’s pulling away from you, eyes wide. He looks at you as if you might break, like fragile glass ready to crack at any moment.
“Are you sure you want this?” Seokmin is sincere, voice woven with care, loosening your own heart strings. “I don’t want you to do something you’re going to regret in the morning,” he whispers, speaking softly, trying not to overstep his boundaries. His thought to put you first was the last undoing of the tangled mess of woven string in your heart, unraveled and exposing yourself to him.
“I’m sure, Seokmin. I want you.”
You don’t get to finish your sentence before Seokmin’s lips are back on yours, swallowing your last breath.
His lips are softer than you imagine and taste of mint and whiskey, combining to create something that was uniquely Seokmin. The hairs stand up along your body, your senses being invigorated by Seokmin’s attention to your lips. Shivers run down your body from his kisses alone and once he starts trailing along your jaw and neck, your skin lights fire, igniting the burning desire within you.
His hands leave your wrists, bringing them to your torso, keeping you close against him as your hands immediately cling to his neck, breathing heavily. He runs small circles along your skin, making you go dizzy.
Panting, you manage to whisper through your short breaths, “Should we take this somewhere that, you know, isn’t my living room floor?”
Seokmin keeps his attention on your neck as he responds between kisses, “I don’t know. I was ready to take you right here.”
“Do you want me to blow my back out?”
“Oh, you’ll be getting your back blown out no matter where you are.. so it’s really up to you.” You can feel him smile against your neck with a small nip. You moan at his words, his confidence making you quiver. This kind of arrogance isn’t something you’re used to seeing on Seokmin, but you can’t deny that it looks good on him, easily molding you like clay under his fingers.
You play it cool, though, or you hope, at least. “I’d rather not have sex with you on my living room rug.”
“Fair enough.”
SMUT WARNING !
As soon as you shut the door, Seokmin finds his hands all over you, bringing you back to his mouth. One of his hands lands on your waist, kneading at your skin underneath your crop top, slightly lifting the fabric. He held on tight, not wanting to let you go, afraid of you disappearing from his grasp. He can’t help but think this is all a dream — his ears ringing with your whines, his fingers grazing your goosebumps, it was everything he’d fantasized about.
“Seokmin…” Your voice sounds sweet in his ears, blissful, a desire dripping from it that he’s never heard from you before.
“What is it?”
Your breath on him is hot, heavy against his skin. “Can we hurry this up because I need you,” you sigh, a small teasing smile playing against your lips. Your hands were grabbing at his clothes desperately, the tug and pull making Seokmin’s head spin. He lets out an airy chuckle, pulling you closer.
Seokmin leads you to your bed, your back hitting the mattress as he runs his hands along your thighs, still leaving kisses along your neck. He trails along the length of your body, down your neck, your clothed chest, your stomach, leaving languid kisses. He was in no rush, wanting this night to last as long as possible, even if it was already two in the morning. He could have you underneath him for hours, your hands pulling at the strands on his head.
He reaches the bottom of your shirt, playing with the hem, leaving open mouthed kisses along your stomach. “Can I?” He asks, referring to your crop as he looks at you, eyes meeting yours. He didn’t want to do anything out of comfort zone, feeling lucky enough to be in this position. As much as the flirty banter made both of your positions clear, he wanted to give you any opportunity to back out if you were ever uncomfortable with crossing the imaginary boundary of your friendship.
You nod and slowly, Seokmin begins to lift your top, revealing your torso. It took everything in him to not confess to you right then and there, the alcohol flowing in his system removing the filter in his mind. He wanted to kiss you all over, sing sweet praises, tell you how much he’d always wanted this and more, how he’s been in love with you since that freshman orientation weekend — everything that’s been on his mind these past two years.
But he settles with a “God, you’re so beautiful,” hoping that you’d recognize the whiskey lacing his words instead of the yearning.
“Why are you acting so surprised? You’ve seen me in a bikini before!”
He has seen you in a bikini and Seokmin had to take a cold shower when he rinsed the chlorine off of his body for the day, hoping you hadn’t noticed his lingering eyes.
“Can’t a guy just compliment his best friend’s naked body before he fucks them?”
He’s also hoping that you don’t notice how hard it was for him to say that, disguising his wince with a teasing smile.
You begin to unbutton your jean shorts, your hands dancing around the waistband of the material. “Are you actually going to fuck me or are you just going to talk about it?”
Oh, you were going to be the death of him. He fears that you know that.
“I should’ve known you were going to be a brat,” Seokmin mutters, still loud enough for you to hear as he pulls down your shorts down your legs. He’s met with a visible wet patch on your black underwear, which almost takes him out right at that moment. The damp fabric is stuck to your cunt, like a second skin. “Fuck.”
“What?”
“You’re so wet,” Seokmin responds, getting closer to the gap between your legs, blowing puffs of air from his words, making you shake from the stimulation.
“Is that a bad thing?” He can hear the insecurity in your voice, the confidence from earlier breaking with you slowly pulling your legs together. Seokmin counteracts this action, bringing your legs apart and opening yourself up to him once again. He plants a soft kiss on your inner thigh and he feels the tension release from your body, welcoming his touch.
He looks up at you earnestly. “Of course not. It’s hot.” He toys with your panties, waiting for your approval to continue.
“You can take them off, Seokmin.”
That was all Seokmin needed, peeling your underwear off.
Seokmin thinks he’s died and gone to heaven. Seeing you bare, spread open for him and only him, was something he’d never believed would happen to him in this lifetime. He’s awestruck at your beauty, only able to respond by kissing your thighs repeatedly, your moans only encouraging him.
He lowers himself close to your pussy and licks a slow, long stroke along your bud. You grab at his head instantly, a whine coming out of you. He circles your folds, teasingly slow, savoring every moment he has between your legs. You taste sweet, more enticing than any of Seokmin’s dreams. His hands took purchase on your waist, pulling you closer to him when you’d steer away. Your arousal builds and he’s quick to flit his tongue against your clit.
“Fuck! Have you always been good at this?” you choke out, the question coming out broken and breathy, a moan following.
Seokmin smiles against you, laughing quietly, the vibrations tickling against his lips. His pride was swelling, hearing you, the person he’s been in love with for two years now, cry for him. The feeling is making him insatiable, the desire to make you cum overriding any other thought in his mind. Your fingers that were in his hair started to pull harder, fervid as the pleasure overtook you.
The ache in between his legs, his dick squeezing in between the fabric of his jeans, started to become excruciating. Seokmin slowly grinds against the mattress, searching for any relief for his own hard-on. It proves to be useless, his arousal moving three steps forward and one step back each time you moan his name. His face was covered in you as you jerk against him, riding out the sensations.
He ghosts his fingers to your entrance, hovering over it, teasing you with the prospect of having them inside of you. He keeps his fingers where they are until you wail, begging for them.
“Seokmin, stop teasing…” your voice trails, punctuated with a gasp, from Seokmin slipping his fingers inside of you.
He didn’t need any lubrication, you were dripping enough for him. The sounds that were coming out of your cunt were lewd and it only turned Seokmin on more, blood rushing to his cock and the strain against his jeans becoming even more unbearable to ignore. He can feel you clenching around his fingers; he knows you’re close. Once he reaches the bumpy surface of your g-spot, your muscles tense even more and your breath hitches, your legs squeezing Seokmin.
“Let go for me,” he whispers with a kiss to your clit. A second later, you’re coming undone, back arching off of the mattress. Your walls pulse against his fingers, making his cock twitch. His eyes were transfixed on your figure, watching you fall apart because of him. You were beautiful, this he always knew to be true, but the image of you tensing around him and cumming against his fingers would be engraved in his mind for the rest of his life.
You begin to come down from your high, Seokmin kissing your inner thigh, eyes shining with awe as he continues to slowly pump in and out of you. You look down at him, relaxing your hands that were once gripping his hair with superhuman strength. He didn’t mind, though. He never minded anything when it came to you, especially since he knew that he was the reason for the overwhelming pleasure.
“Oh my god… Seriously, where did you learn to eat pussy like that?” you breathe out, still trying to catch your breath.
“I don’t know,” Seokmin chuckles as he slowly pulls his fingers out of you. “I guess I’m just a natural.”
You sit up, reaching for Seokmin’s chin as you bring his lips to yours, taking his breath away. He's completely intoxicated by you, the alcohol wearing off and being replaced by your allure. It still amazes him how you have him trapped under your spell, wrapped around your finger — and you don’t even know it. Seokmin is so lost in your kiss, he doesn’t realize that he’s now on his back with you straddling him, your hands fumbling with his zipper.
“Let me take care of you,” you coo, your lips still close to his, brushing against them softly.
It pains Seokmin, the thought of your mouth around his length, his body shivers with the image in his mind. “I’m going to be honest, while I’d love to have you sucking me off, I’d cum in 30 seconds,” he confesses. “I need to be inside of you. Now.” You smile so bright, so enchanting, Seokmin is already seeing stars when you kiss him again, only breaking the kiss to take off his pants and underwear and he removes his shirt.
“Do you have a condom?” he asks, lingering on your body as you remove your bra.
“There’s one inside my nightstand.”
Once Seokmin rolls the condom down his length, your body hovering over him, he finally realizes that this is actually happening. This might not be the way he thought it would ever happen, but he doesn’t have much time to think about it before you’re sinking down on him, enveloping his cock in your heat with a curse.
You pause, eyes screwed shut as you mentally curse. Tears threaten to fall, pooling to the side of your eyes. Seokmin sees this and panics, immediately sitting up, rubbing soft circles on your cheek. “Hey, hey, are you okay? What’s wrong?” He speaks softly, comforting, afraid that you would crack.
You shake your head, finally opening your eyes to look at him. “It’s nothing, it’s just…”
“Just what?”
“I just had to adjust. You’re…” you pause, thinking carefully on your words, “much bigger than I anticipated.”
Seokmin can’t help but feel smug. He can feel you clenching around him, squeezing the life out of his cock. He can’t hide his smirk, but he’s quick to give you a tender kiss, feeling you relax on top of him. “Just relax. You set the pace,” he soothes and you nod in response.
He stays sitting up as you slowly start to rock back and forth on his lap and Seokmin is already seeing stars, holding back moans. You start slow and easy, setting a rhythmic pace, building pleasure and you lean your head on his shoulder. “Fuck, Seokmin.”
“What is it, baby?” The pet name slips out before Seokmin can catch it. He mentally curses, hoping you don’t notice. It tastes sweet on his tongue, like it was meant to come out of his mouth.
“You feel so good,” you moan, punctuating the statement with a clamp on his cock.
“I can say the same for you.” It was embarrassing how close Seokmin already was, completely drunk on you. Every squeeze, every whine brought him closer to his dissolve; it took every ounce of Seokmin’s self-control to not let go right there. It took everything in him to not confess, tell you that this was everything he’d ever dreamt of, that he was helplessly and completely in love with you. Seeing you drunk on him, on his cock, was shattering all of his resolve.
“Seokmin, I’m so close,” you whine.
Thank God, Seokmin thinks. His hands that were on your waist guide you, bouncing you up and down on his cock, helping you reach your high. “C’mon, baby, you can do it.” Fuck, I’ve got to stop saying that…
He feels your nails dig into him, creating crescent moons and threatening to break skin as the tension that was building in your body starts to snap, an overwhelming amount of electricity coursing through your veins. Seokmin’s willpower is left on a thread, feeling your velvet walls tense around his cock, he’s close to his own climax. Once he’s looking at you, seeing your pleasure wash over you, your eyebrows furrowed and a symphony of moans releasing from your mouth, he’s done for. His orgasm crashes against him and he grips your waist tightly, keeping your body at a steady pace as he empties inside of you.
You're both left panting, bodies spent and going still. All that’s left in the air is your breath and the humidity as you both come down from your highs. Seokmin doesn’t know what comes over him, but the overwhelming need to kiss you takes over his body. He doesn’t think, just reaches up and pulls you to his lips, kissing you passionately until his thoughts come back to him.
Well, where do we go from here?
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