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trivia-yandere · 1 month ago

Text

kitty

when you're going through a rough heat, who else is there to call besides bunny hybrid jeon jungkook?

word count: 5.570

warning: hybrid au, dirty talking, bunny jungkook, cat reader, smut, submissive reader, dominant jungkook, rough sex, dirty talk, degradation, heat, jk calls reader "kitty", nipple sucking, overstimulation, squirting, creampie, unprotected sex, oral sex, fingering, breeding kink,

like idk yall i seen this video and almost fell tf out so I was like why not do what i do best and make a fic

The first time you met Jungkook, you pondered if he was something else in his past life. Maybe a lion or tiger - a fearless wolf. As a bunny hybrid, he had little to none of the characteristics. The bunny hybrids you’d met were all full of fear and caution. Any little sound sets their fight or flight off - and it’s never truly fight. They were naturally terrified people, always shutting themselves away from those who were considered “predators”.

Jeon Jungkook was different. For a bunny hybrid, he lacked the fear of a hare. He often stood tall and firm, never cowering like his fellow bunny hybrids. When he spoke, he looked you in the eye - prey or predator. The only thing he had in common with them was his diet - consisting of various fruits and vegetables.

You were a cat hybrid. You wouldn’t consider yourself top of the predator hierarchy but you weren’t a prey. You - and those you associate with - share too many characteristics with that of a feline. You cannot fathom not sleeping the majority of the day and eating even when you aren’t hungry. You were often cranky and you didn’t enjoy unnecessary noise.

There were a lot of things you didn’t like and Jeon Jungkook was one of them. He was too hyper and energetic, often hopping around - even in his human form - and being a complete nuisance. You despised whenever you and he were forced to be around one another because that meant that you weren’t going to know any peace.

You recall when you first met Jungkook. “Sorry, Y/N can be a bit…grumpy.” Yuna murmured to Namjoon. She looked down at you in your cat form - a form you preferred to be in when you longed around lazily. Your back was arched and your ears were casted backwards, ready to attack.

And you were hissing right at Namjoon - but not at him. At Jungkook, the chocolate- colored bunny in his arms.

Yuna had warned you that her relationship with Namjoon was going great and he had even gone as far as to ask if she wanted to move in with him. She contemplated it - they’ve been together for a year already.

You, however, were a factor Yuna had to consider. Especially since Jungkook was around. Neither you or Jungkook were considered “pets” to Namjoon and Yuna; even if that was what it was “legally”. You’ve grown alongside Yuna, she is only a few human years older than you.

In a world where hybrids are sold to families as pets, you were placed into Yuna’s household by her grandfather. She still doesn’t know how her grandfather acquired a young feline hybrid, but you were always treated like a family member rather than a pet.

Now, years later, you enjoyed Yuna’s place. She had taken you along with her when she moved out instead of leaving you with her parents. The entire household already smelled of you - a scent Yuna couldn’t smell herself as a human - and you enjoyed everything to be exactly where you wanted it. There wasn’t anything in the household that you didn’t know where it was exactly.

One of the main reason why moving to Namjoon’s place would simply not work - so Yuna offered for Namjoon to move here.

Jungkook wasn’t considered a pet with Namjoon either and unlike you, Jungkook was a ray of sunshine. Yuna still tells the story of how when she first met Jungkook - in his bunny form - he had hoped right into her lap that she was so shocked that he was hybrid and so friendly. She still tells the story of when you “met” her first boyfriend - a boy from High School she had forgotten to tell you was coming over. You had attacked the poor boy so bad that he left not even 10 minutes later covered in scratches.

You, to this day, refused to see how you were wrong.

“You’re going to have to go to your room if you’re going to be hostile.” Yuna had said with a stern voice when you hissed at the bunny. Namjoon had put him onto the ground cautiously. “Why don’t we introduce you and Jungkook properly? You’ll probably like him better that way.”

Yuna knows your type and it was one of the reasons she suggested it. She was shocked herself at how something so cute could turn to a hot piece of ass - something she told Namjoon bashfully.

But of course, at that time, you were being stubborn. You clawed at Jungkook instead and that only prompted Yuna to yank you up and speed walk down the hall to your own bedroom. She was warm with embarrassment and she threw you onto your bed and immediately, you turned into your naked human self.

Yuna had seen you naked countless times that it doesn’t affect her - but she had told you with Namjoon moving in, you could no longer randomly go between cat and human forms. One of the many reasons why him and that hare shouldn’t be in your home.

“What the fuck is your problem?” Yuna hissed. “I told you-”

“I think he was sizing me up.” you interrupted, eyes staring straight back at hers. “Coming into here like he owns the place.”

Yuna knows you’re talking about Jungkook. You met Namjoon before and immediately liked him, expressing to her that she and him were perfect together.

“You do this all the time when there’s other hybrids involved. You’re so jealous-”

“Territorial.” you corrected. “And that hare stinks! How old is he even?”

Yuna rolled her eyes. “He’s younger than me and Namjoon but-”

“Ugh, I hate kids.” you rolled your eyes. “No wonder.”

It wasn’t a lie. You hated a lot of things and sometimes, Yuna couldn’t understand why she adored you so much. You just didn’t like people you weren’t accustomed to. Oftentimes, you’d sit at the window and hiss just because if you saw children - even if they weren’t doing anything worthy of being hissed at.

‘You must want me to die alone.” Yuna crossed her arms. “You always do this with every person I date that owns a hybrid.”

“We all die alone. Do you expect to be buried with anyone?” you deadpan, yet you pout a bit. You didn’t want Yuna to feel as though you didn’t care about her. It was that hare you didn’t care about - coming into your home and sniffling as if he owned the air.

“I just really like Namjoon, Y/N…”

Your ears perk at the way Yuna’s voice drops.

“FIne.” you exhaled. It hurted you to say that. “But keep that hare out of my stuff…”

Accepting Yuna and Namjoon’s relationship meant accepting Jungkook. You had locked yourself in your room the first week before you came out. You have yet to witness Jungkook in his human form and vice versa. But that didn’t mean that you weren’t around one another.

Jungkook was overbearing, hopping around in your space. It didn’t matter how much you hissed or swiped at him, he followed.

There were times in which you enjoyed your peace and it was as if Jungkook was determined to ruin it. A month into living with him - and still neither of you had presented to one another outside of your hybrid forms - you were sitting at the window seal. You were soaking up the sun, eyes closed and purring with satisfaction. Your tail wagged back and forth and - You’re suddenly caught off guard by the sudden pressure on your side, prompting you to fall onto the hardwood floor. You land on your feet, but immediately are being pushed onto your side by a familiar being.

Yuna watched lazily as you and Jungkook - as cat and rabbit - begin to fight. Typically, it began with Jungkook, who has always been smitten by you since day 1, climbing onto you.

Today he was feeling extra perverse and he’d begun to hump you - an action that had caused you to attack him entirely. Your claws dig into his fur to shield him off and you’d hiss. The action is funny to watch a bunny hump onto a cat - but knowing that it was just you and Jungkook made it even funnier.

Namjoon didn’t find it funny, however, and you hadn’t seen Jungkook for a week after that. He had apologized profusely about Jungkook’s behavior to you - both in cat form and while in human for when you had stumbled out early in the morning one night to sneak food.

The first time you saw Jungkook in his human form, you were in complete shock. You were home alone. Yuna was at work and Namjoon had visited his parents for the evening for dinner. You only assumed Jungkook went with him.

Wrong.

Witnessing a tall man in your home had sent alarm bells in your head. He had sat at the dinner table, munching on an array of celery and carrots. His nose had twitched in a way that appeared oddly familiar.

“Jung…kook?” you had asked, voice so meek. You were literally cat-like, Jungkook thinks. The way you were completely still, watching him with wide alert eyes.

“Y/N?” Jungkook tilted his head, his eyes growing wide with wonder, as well.

You, flustered, had run away. You had called Yuna and asked her why in the world she didn’t tell you that Jungkook looked like that. She had laughed gleefully, stating that finally you were going to come around once you saw just what the man looked like.

The sexual tension is excruciating.

Not just for you and Jungkook, but for Yuna and Namjoon.

Jungkook hadn’t made it a secret that he found you attractive. He followed you around oftentimes when at home, no matter how bitchy you were.

Namjoon has always been attentive when it comes to Jungkook ruts. He had no problem with allowing Jungkook to do what he wanted - deal with it alone or have someone help him. But this wasn’t just his home anymore, so for Jungkook’s rut he had gotten him a hotel room that specializes in ruts and heats.

Against Jungkook’s best wishes to ask you to help him. He was upset and Namjoon had to drag him out of the home - but he wasn’t going to allow him to make you anymore uncomfortable.

Jungkook had gotten another cat hybrid to help him after nearly 45 minutes of searching.

Namjoon doesn’t believe Yuna when she tells him that you are just as infatuated with Jungkook as he is with you. You, however, are just bitchy. Simple. You would never admit that you find him attractive - but Yuna sometimes would find you sitting on the window seal in cat form watching as Jungkook works out outside. Or how when you all eat dinner together, your pupils would grow big watching Jungkook.

This is how Yuna finds you one weekend. You’re in distress and Yuna can hear you. She finds your small cat body on your bed, meowing. Your meow is so soft and laced with such need and yearning that she instantly knows what’s wrong.

“You’re in heat.” Yuna strokes a finger on your head, a giggle in her voice.

If you were in your normal state, you would’ve bit her for teasing you. But you’re in heat and thus, highly horny.

“Do you want me to ask Jungkook?”

That is not what you wanted at all. You didn’t want to see Jungkook’s naked body hovering above yours, those dark eyes staring intently at you as he fucks-

“Oh fuck.” you say, your naked body now against your bed. You roll around and scream into the sheets.

“You so want Jungkook.” Yuna squeals. She’s already texting Namjoon, stating that for the weekend, the both of them would need to book a hotel. You could have the home and be comfortable to enjoy your heat.

With Jungkook.

No interruptions.

“I…I can’t.” you murmur, clenching your thighs together. Everytime you think about it, it just causes your core to throb more and more.

“Why can’t you?” Yuna questions. “You want Jungkook. Jungkook wants you. You’re in heat so of course he’ll fuck the shit out of you-”

You groan - more like moan needily.

Yuna is gone within an hour and leaves you and Jungkook alone.

You’re determined, though. You aren’t going to fall into temptation.

Jungkook never makes anything easier for you, either.

You’re at the counter, cutting into your steak when you sense Jungkook behind you. Though Yuna nor Namjoon had told him why they were leaving for the weekend, he could sense something was different in the air.

Jungkook had watched you leave your room from down the hall and immediately noticed the sway in your hips. You smell different, too. More sweeter.

“Y/N.”

You don’t stop cutting into your steak, but your thighs do clench at the sound of Jungkook’s deep voice.

“Jungkook.” you respond.

Jungkook’s ear perks. Your voice is different; low in tone and a bit…breathy?

Jungkook licks his lips.

“Wanna watch a movie?”

You snort. “What movie?” you place your cut steak into a bowl and slowly turn around. You didn’t want to face him, but you had to.

Jungkook’s wearing grey sweatpants - red flag number one. They’re dangerously low around his waist. His tank top is tight and you’re positive that he had worked out earlier today.

“Whatever you want to watch, baby.” Jungkook licks his lips, tilting his head at you.

Red flag number two. Your stomach churns at the sight and immediately, your eyes flicker away. You clench the bowl in your hands. “I-I guess.”

You were in heat, it’s more obvious now.

Jungkook enjoys your banter. He adores the way you’d hiss at him with those hard eyes. You’d insult him and everything he loves - but that only turns Jungkook on.

Now, however, you were being - dare he say - submissive. You were nervous, your body warm. You’re shy and not meeting his eyes and you hadn’t stopped clenching your legs since you and he stepped into his bedroom. In any other circumstance, you wouldn’t have come to his room to watch any movie, but you did today.

You also hadn’t stopped trembling as you ate your steak.

You picked a random movie and sat on his bed, furthest away from Jungkook. You had nervously finished your steak and were watching the movie, but couldn’t focus on it. Your mind is occupied with the smell in Jungkook’s room; ivory and clean. It smelt so much like him that it was driving you crazy.

“You’ve been still for nearly 45 minutes now.”

Your head snaps to the sound of Jungkook’s voice and you swallow thickly. Your pupils, Jungkook notices, are large and round. He admires that just as he does when you’re in cat form.

“Is everything alright, kitty?”

Jungkook’s lip twitches upward. He’s smirking right at you - he knows. He can smell the sweet scent of your ripped pussy. Your leg is shaking with anticipation and if he’s correct, you’re screaming to be mounted right about now - and have been ever since you’ve gotten into heat.

Your mouth parts so you can let out a sigh.

“It hurts.” Jungkook states. He knows - he’s been through this. He isn’t sure how heats work for women, but he knows for men, ruts are unbearable. He’s constantly hard, his cock begging to be buried deep into something warm, tight and wet. “Doesn’t it, kitty?”

You nod your head, staring right at him with those pleading eyes.

“What do you want me to do for you?” Jungkook ponders. The television dances off of his face, casting a shadow that causes your heart to pump.

Your attraction for Jungkook is evident, even if you do hide it behind annoyance oftentimes. Now, you cannot hide the fact that your eyes wander to his arms. His biceps are so big and you always itch to feel them - bonus if it’s flexed. To his sweatpants. He’s seated leaning against his wall, completely relaxed in contrast to your uptight position. His legs are spreaded and his hand lights on his thigh lazily.

You speak before your mind can process what you’re saying. “I want you to fuck me.”

“Aww, kitty.” Jungkook sing-sons, but in mere seconds he’s on you. He tugs at your clothing, knowing you’re itching to get out of them. They’re too tight against your hot, sticky skin. “You’re gonna be a good girl for me, right?”

You nod your head as Jungkook pulls at your shorts and discards them, your soaked panties going along with them.

Your scent instantly fills his nostrils now that you’re naked. He groans, licking his lips with great satisfaction. “Smell so sweet, kitty. I know you taste even sweeter.”

“Please fuck me, Kook.” your back is against his warm sheets now and you’re pleading. You didn’t want to wait - you’ve been waiting all day. You weren’t strong enough to fight off the natural urges to be stuffed.

“You’re so needy.” Jungkook’s hands roam your now naked body. He’s been dying to sink his teeth onto your skin, run his tongue across it. He thought about burying his face between your legs and eating you until you were a shaking mess.

“Please, Kook.” you beg again, a hand grasping his tank top. “We have all weekend.”

How right you were.

Jungkook is tugging his sweatpants down, his cock immediately poking out. Pink, angry tip oozing with pre-cum that causes you to groan at how pretty it was. “Turn around. You’re such a begging whore, kitty.”

You compy, arching your back like the good whore he told you that you were. Your thighs break apart and widen, telling him that you were ready.

“You’re already dripping and I haven’t even fucked you yet.” Jungkook chuckles darkly, marveling at your glistening cunt.

You let out a sharp breath when Jungkook’s tip slides between your wet folds. Your pussy instantly clenches around nothing, your thighs quivering. Jungkook inhales sharply, your wet pussy throbbing so much that he can feel it.

“Please fuck me, Kook. I’ve been waiting so long.” you whimper. You wiggle a bit, hoping that you would feel him slide into you.

You begging for Jungkook’s cock sends him off. He enters you swiftly and in one go. You yelp out, pussy instantly clamping around his cock.

“Oh fuck, kitty.” Jungkook groaned, head leaned back. His hands instantly wrap onto your hips, his nails digging into your skin to keep you close.

Jungkook’s cock begins to pump, thrusting so deep that he hits in the very spot that you need him to. Your fingers dig into his sheets for comfort while your mouth is falling open to let such sensual moans.

You were a submissive little thing while in heat, Jungkook notes, fully allowing him to take control of your body. His hips rut, fucking his cock deeper and deeper into you. With each thrust, you’re growing louder, your pussy begging for more. He would have never thought he’d see the day this happens - he always took you as the more dominant type.

But, you were also a feline and maybe that has something to do with the way your heat is set up. Whatever it was, Jungkook was enjoying it. His eyes are fixed on the way your ass bounces against him, your pussy making such beautiful squelching sounds with each pump of his cock.

“You’re so pretty, kitty. You should see how good you looked being fucked.” Jungkook pants. You’re creaming on his cock entirely, a sight he never wants to forget.

“Feel’s s-s-so good.” you stutter, your eyes fluttering. Deep down, you hated being in this position. So vulnerable towards Jungkook, the man you’ve hated longer than you’ve liked him. But you were far too gone now in your heat and all you truly wanted was Jungkook.

What you did care about was the way Jungkook fucks you, slamming his cock in and out of you at such an alarming pace. You’ve heard about rabbit hybrids - how good fuckers they were. Their staminas rarely decreasing. You’ve never thought you’d experience one before.

There’s such filthy noises coming from Jungkook’s bedroom that you’re glad that Yuna and Namjoon aren’t home - you couldn’t bear doing the walk of shame back to your room.

“Gonna cum all over my cock already?” Jungkook chuckles darkly. He can feel the way you’re squeezing him, your back arching to feel even more of his cock. “Go ahead and cum, kitty, but I’m not done with your pussy just yet.”

Jungkook was a man of his word. You creamy cum coats his cock entirely as he sends you over the edge. Instead, he flips you onto your back and forces your legs apart. Witnessing your glistening pussy this way was another sight he has to save in his mind - in case he never gets to have you in this position again.

Jungkook leans down, both of his large hands engulfing your breast. He manages to capture both of your nipples into his mouth, suckling harshly onto them. You gasp, already going through such a great amount of overstimulation - but Jungkook doesn’t care.

Jungkook continues to suckle and smack onto your nipples, his tip rubbing against your throbbing clit. You had to admit the sight of him - so handsome and dominant - against you sends another wave of pleasure to fall through you.

“Kookie, please.” you gasp out.

Jungkook’s dark eyes flicker up at you. He pops your nipples from his lips, saliva coating them and leans back. He removes his tank top and throws it aside then goes towards his sweat pants and removes them as well.

Jungkook had already fucked you, but witnessing him naked just as much as you is a reminder that you and him are actually doing this - when you were done with your heat, this was going to be engrained in your mind forever.

Jungkook settles back between your legs. He grasps his cock and slaps it against your throbbing, wet clit. “What do you want, kitty?” he asks.

“I want your cock.” you respond as if on command. “Please fuck me, Kookie.”

Jungkook smirks. “These little nicknames you’ve never called me before are cute.” he says, rubbing his pink tip against your clit. “I’m used to you calling me such harsher names.”

“I’m sorry.” you pout.

Jungkook licks his lips. The Y/N he knew would never apologize - you were truly fucked out.

“It’s okay, kitty. You know I love it.”

Jungkook begins to enter you. His large hand places itself right onto your stomach to keep you in place. He starts slowly, inching deeper and deeper into you. You’re watching just as intently as he is when his cock fully enters you.

Then, without warning, Jungkook’s hips begin to snap aggressively. He pounds in and out of you, his hand on your stomach forcing you to stay in place. You were a moaning, squealing mess in less than a minute. The room echoes with wet skin slapping, groans and squeals - the movie now just background noise that neither of you care about.

Feeling Jungkook raw like this in this position was amazing - you felt every throbbing vein of his cock, every curve as it pumps in and out of you.

“Kitty…” Jungkook groans, his eyes watching the way your face is drawn with such pleasure. “...I’ve wanted to feel your pussy around me for so long now.”

Jungkook is never going to make things easier for you. His hair is stuck to his forehead due to the beads of sweat. His eyes are dark with lust and it doesn’t help how completely fit he was - how you’ve managed this long without jumping his bones was astonishing even to you.

“I’ve wanted you when I was in rut but Joon forced me away.” Jungkook’s hips snap even harder now at the memory. He could smell you from just down the hall, his cock hard. “I had to fuck another cat hybrid, but she wasn’t you.”

Jungkook’s hand was going to bruise your stomach with how tight he was holding you, but he doesn’t care - and neither do you. All you cared about was how delicious his cock felt slamming into you - how disrespectful it may look from the outside looking in.

“Your pussy’s so tight and ready to be bred. I haven’t even came in you yet, kitty.” Jungkook chuckles darkly. He should’ve asked if you were on any forms of protection, but he has an idea that you aren’t. From what he’s heard from Namjoon, you don’t typically warm up to outsiders; especially men.

Maybe it makes it even more special that you’ve managed to warm up to Jungkook. Still, he’d just pull out of you when the time comes.

Jungkook’s hand slides down just enough so his thumb could twirl onto your already overstimulated clit. He watches the way your thigh quivers and you begin to squirm beneath him.

“Feel’s good, kitty?”

“Yes…!” you huff out.

“You’re already so close again, kitty.” Jungkook chuckles smugly. “Such a greedy pussy you have.”

You’re whining now, your pussy drenching not only your thighs and Jungkook’s cock, but his sheet. He doesn’t mind it in the slightest - this was just the beginning of your heat. This was the most intense.

“Wanna feel you cum in me.”

Such perverted words - Jungkook groans. You were so far out of it that he wasn’t going to acknowledge what you said. The point of the heats was for you to be bred - but he wasn’t going to do that. He couldn’t, right?

No.

Jungkook continues to pump his cock into you, his thumb twirling even harsher now. Your back is arched slightly, your pussy clenching his cock so tightly and before he knows it, his abdomen is being drenched.

“Oh fuck,” Jungkook gasps, the sight of your squirting pussy sends him completely over the edge that he’s cumming right in you without realizing. He attempts to pull out of you, but he’s too slow. Your legs somehow find a way to wrap around his waist and you allow the warm cum to stuff you just like you wanted.

Most of your days consisted of the same routine.

After the sex, you and Jungkook would rest. You stayed in his room and he hadn’t minded in the slightest, holding you close against him.

When you awoke, you were hungry. Jungkook enjoys watching you eat, even if you were devouring meat while he stuck to his fruits and vegetables. He likes the way your teeth sinks into the bloodied steak, your tongue licking your lips to savor the taste.

After eating, you’d fuck each others brains out. It was therapeutic, really, the amount of positions Jungkook has had you in in such a short amount of time.

Jungkook has fucked you in front of his mirror, showing you just how good you looked when you were fucked out and begging for more. He’s had you against the wall, your legs wrapping tightly around him so he didn’t have a choice but to milk your walls with more of his seed - you’re too far into your heat to give a fuck about the consequences.

Currently, Jungkook’s head is bobbing back and forth. He’s on his knees at the edge of the bed, left hand gripping your thigh while his right is firmly gripping your ass. His tongue flickers past your clit greedily, those sinful moans music to his ears.

Jungkook finds that he simply cannot get enough of you - not your scent or your taste. Whenever you’re ready for another round, so is he.

“Slow down” you grumble softly, but your hand gripping his hair says differently. So do your hips that slowly begin to grind against his warm tongue.

“You sure?” Jungkook questions smugly, flickering his eyes up. His right hand slides from your ass to tap against your clenching and unclenching hole. “You’re making a mess all over me, kitty.”

Jungkook watches your reaction just as his fingers enter you. Your already wet pussy continues to drip all over him, begging to be bred and used for his enjoyment - like it has since the beginning. His curls curl just a bit as he pumps them in and out of you, marveling at how wet you get with each thrust.

Your teeth are sinked down against your lips, drawing a bit of blood. You weren’t trying to be quiet - there wasn’t a point in it. The pleasure of Jungkook’s fingers were just highly overwhelming. Your pussy’s squelching loudly and the noise dances off his bedroom walls - when this was all over, you promised him that you’d clean his room top to bottom.

“You have such a pretty pussy, kitty.” Jungkook grunts, pressing a firm kiss on your clit. “I want you to cum all over me again.

You’ve heard this all before from him, but each time you do, it causes you to whimper. Jungkook’s voice just does something to you - the way he speaks so calmly, but with such authority. His beautiful face and dark eyes that look right at you, rosy lips that often smirks when you’re moaning because he knows he’s fucking you good.

Jungkook connects his lips back onto your already throbbing clit, his tongue devouring instantly. He rolls it harshly, groaning along as his fingers thrust in and out.

In and out - in and out.

Your thighs are shaking, your hands continuing to grip at his dark hair. Your head falls back against the pillows and you let out a long moan.

You ponder how things were going to go back to normal between you and Jungkook. How could you pretend to hate him when you’ve been fucked too good by him - a bunny hybrid. His ego was going to go through the roof now and Yuna and Namjoon would know just how amazing he was.

Fuck.

You were cumming, Jungkooks warm tongue twirling around your sensitive bud effortlessly. You were beginning to hate him again with how amazing he was with his cock, tongue and fingers - it just wasn’t fair how all of this could be tied to one annoying man.

Jungkook knows you well enough that you want his cock next. He pushes himself up and forces your legs to your shoulders. You're so wet that his cock slides right into you, your arousal seeping out with each inch of his cock.

Jungkook doesn’t hesitate - and you don’t want him to. He slides out of you until his tip is still inside and then slams right back in, hitting your sweet spot.

Your lips part to let out a strangled moan. Jungkook does it again and again, slamming his cock in and out of your sweet pussy, wet skin slapping against one another. Jungkook’s balls, full of enough cum to give you more and more just how you like, slam against your ass with each thrust. Your breasts bounce right in his line of view and Jungkook imagines how good they’d look swelled up with milk.

Jungkook groans. It was natural for him to want to breed - even if it was with a person of a different species. The babies would be either or - feline or hare; the feline trait was the dominant trait of the two. It was at this moment he hadn’t thought about the consequences of doing this without any protection, his natural instincts kicking in.

“You’d look so pretty round with kits.” Jungkook groans, his eyes drifting to your stomach. “Or kittens - whatever they’d be.”

Your pussy clenches at the thought, your heat clouding your mind from sanity. You only thought about his pumping cock milking your walls with his seed again - and again and again until your stomach is round.

“Your tits would grow bigger for our kits. Full of milk…” Jungkook cannot help it anymore. He leans down to wrap his tongue around your nipple, imagining the way they’d taste if they were full of milk.

Your sights are blurry. It was all too much - Jungkook’s dirty words with his pumping cock and now his tongue suckling onto your breast as if his life depended on it. You were cumming again with each sloppy thrust of Jungkook’s hips sending you deeper and deeper over the edge.

“Fuck you’re so pretty when you come, kitty.” Jungkook groans, popping your nipple from his wet lips.

“‘wanna feel you cum in me, Kookie.” you beg, thighs already shaking.

Of course you did, Jungkook thinks. You wanted his cum from the very beginning and who was he to not give it to you? You were such a good girl when you were in heat, completely different from your usually bitchy self that he adored that he couldn’t help but give you whatever you asked for.

Jungkook cums, his legs shaking and eyes snapping shut. His breathing is intense as cum seeps into you.

Your eyes are heavy, your pussy clenching and unclenching every so often to take in all of Jungkook’s warm cum.

“You’re going to be so pissed when you’re off of your heat, kitty.” Jungkook murmurs, still cumming into your warm cunt.

Kits or kittens didn’t sound too bad, right?

@investedreader @sweetempathprunetree @darkuni63 @momnomnom

#kitty #trivia-yandere #explicit-tae #jungkook smut #jungkook x reader #jungkook hybrid #bts hybrid au #bts smut #btswritingcafe #bangtanwriters net #btswriterscollective #btswritersclub #bangtanwritershq #bangtan smut #bunny jungkook

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fans4wga · 2 years ago

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"The studios thought they could handle a strike. They might end up sparking a revolution"

by Mary McNamara

"If you want to start a revolution, tell your workers you’d rather see them lose their homes than offer them fair wages. Then lecture them about how their “unrealistic” demands are “disruptive” to the industry, not to mention disturbing your revels at Versailles, er, Sun Valley.

Honestly, watching the studios turn one strike into two makes you wonder whether any of their executives have ever seen a movie or watched a television show. Scenes of rich overlords sipping Champagne and acting irritated while the crowd howls for bread rarely end well for the Champagne sippers.

This spring, it sometimes seemed like the Hollywood studios represented by the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers were actively itching for a writers’ strike. Speculations about why, exactly, ran the gamut: Perhaps it would save a little money in the short run and show the Writers Guild of America (perceived as cocky after its recent ability to force agents out of the packaging business) who’s boss.

More obviously, it might secure the least costly compromise on issues like residuals payments and transparency about viewership.

But the 20,000 members of the WGA are not the only people who, having had their lives and livelihoods upended by the streaming model, want fair pay and assurances about the use of artificial intelligence, among other sticking points. The 160,000 members of the Screen Actors Guild-American Federation of Television and Radio Artists share many of the writers’ concerns. And recent unforced errors by studio executives, named and anonymous, have suddenly transformed a fight the studios were spoiling for into a public relations war they cannot win.

Even as SAG-AFTRA representatives were seeing a majority of their demands rejected despite a nearly unanimous strike vote, a Deadline story quoted unnamed executives detailing a strategy to bleed striking writers until they come crawling back.

Days later, when an actors’ strike seemed imminent, Disney Chief Executive Bob Iger took time away from the Sun Valley Conference in Idaho not to offer compromise but to lecture. He told CNBC’s David Faber that the unions’ refusal to help out the studios by taking a lesser deal is “very disturbing to me.”

“There’s a level of expectation that they have that is just not realistic,” Iger said. “And they are adding to the set of the challenges that this business is already facing that is, quite frankly, very disruptive.”

If Iger thought his attempt to exec-splain the situation would make actors think twice about walking out, he was very much mistaken. Instead, he handed SAG-AFTRA President Fran Drescher the perfect opportunity for the kind of speech usually shouted atop the barricades.

“We are the victims here,” she said Thursday, marking the start of the actors’ strike. “We are being victimized by a very greedy entity. I am shocked by the way the people that we have been in business with are treating us. I cannot believe it, quite frankly: How far apart we are on so many things. How they plead poverty, that they’re losing money left and right, when giving hundreds of millions of dollars to their CEOs. It is disgusting. Shame on them. They stand on the wrong side of history at this very moment.”

Cue the cascading strings of “Les Mis,” bolstered by images of the most famous people on the planet walking out in solidarity: the cast of “Oppenheimer” leaving the film’s London premiere; the writers and cast of “The X-Files” reuniting on the picket line.

A few days later, Barry Diller, chairman and senior executive of IAC and Expedia Group and a former Hollywood studio chief, suggested that studio executives and top-earning actors take a 25% pay cut to bring a quick end to the strikes and help prevent “the collapse of the entire industry.”

When Diller is telling executives to take a pay cut to avoid destroying their industry, it is no longer a strike, or even two strikes. It is a last-ditch attempt to prevent le déluge.

Yes, during the 2007-08 writers’ strike, picketers yelled noncomplimentary things at executives as they entered their respective lots. (“What you earnin’, Chernin?” was popular at Fox, where Peter Chernin was chairman and chief executive.) But that was before social media made everything more immediate, incendiary and personal. (Even if they have never seen a movie or TV show, one would think that people heading up media companies would understand how media actually work.)

Even at the most heated moments of the last writers’ strike, executives like Chernin and Iger were seen as people who could be reasoned with — in part because most of the executives were running studios, not conglomerations, but mostly because the pay gap between executives and workers, in Hollywood and across the country, had not yet widened to the reprehensible chasm it has since.

Now, the massive eight- and nine-figure salaries of studio heads alongside photos of pitiably small residual checks are paraded across legacy and social media like historical illustrations of monarchs growing fat as their people starve. Proof that, no matter how loudly the studios claim otherwise, there is plenty of money to go around.

Topping that list is Warner Bros. Discovery Chief Executive Davd Zaslav. Having re-named HBO Max just Max and made cuts to the beloved Turner Classic Movies, among other unpopular moves, Zaslav has become a symbol of the cold-hearted, highly compensated executive that the writers and actors are railing against.

The ferocious criticism of individual executives’ salaries has placed Hollywood’s labor conflict at the center of the conversation about growing wealth disparities in the U.S., which stokes, if not causes, much of this country’s political divisions. It also strengthens the solidarity among the WGA and SAG-AFTRA and with other groups, from hotel workers to UPS employees, in the midst of disputes during what’s been called a “hot labor summer.”

Unfortunately, the heightened antagonism between studio executives and union members also appears to leave little room for the kind of one-on-one negotiation that helped end the 2007-08 writers’ strike. Iger’s provocative statement, and the backlash it provoked, would seem to eliminate him as a potential elder statesman who could work with both sides to help broker a deal.

Absent Diller and his “cut your damn salaries” plan, there are few Hollywood figures with the kind of experience, reputation and relationships to fill the vacuum.

At this point, the only real solution has been offered by actor Mark Ruffalo, who recently suggested that workers seize the means of production by getting back into the indie business, which is difficult to imagine and not much help for those working in television.

It’s the AMPTP that needs to heed Iger’s admonishment. At a time when the entertainment industry is going through so much disruption, two strikes is the last thing anyone needs, especially when the solution is so simple. If the studios don’t want a full-blown revolution on their hands, they’d be smart to give members of the WGA and SAG-AFTRA contracts they can live with."

#sag-aftra strike #sag strike #fans4wga #writers guild strike #actors guild strike #union solidarity #wga strong #i stand with the wga #wga strike #writers strike

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the-crooked-library · 4 months ago

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Blurred Lines: Agency and Victimhood in Gothic Horror

Seeing as Robert Eggers' Nosferatu has just breached a cool $135M at the worldwide box office, it might be as good a time to talk about this as any. I believe I echo the sentiments of most diehard fans of gothic horror when I say this: while we are glad to see this masterpiece meet with well-deserved success, these numbers also mean that a significant proportion of its audience has been previously unfamiliar with the hallmarks of our beloved genre; and the resulting disconnect between the viewers and the source material has been the driving force behind the great majority of the online discourse that surrounds it.

The tools and conventions of the gothic, as a genre, are essential to Nosferatu's primary narrative arc. Its central character, Ellen Hutter, cannot be discussed outside of her literary context. Textually, she balances between heroine and damsel in distress - blurred, in many ways, from mainstream understanding.

That is done entirely on purpose. There are numerous reasons for it; I could go into heavy detail about it; and I will - under the cut, of course.

The main thing I must make absolutely clear (before delving any deeper) is that the gothic genre is fundamentally non-literal. It deals heavily in metaphor, allegory, allusion, obfuscation - and, indeed, the blurred lines that have recently caused so much controversy online. This is by design. It is not a flaw of storytelling or interpretation. The gothic affronts the rigid, black-and-white, mainstream forms of morality because that is what it has always been designed to do; and the newer installments like Nosferatu do the same, being built upon those traditional foundations.

The historical background is therefore essential to the understanding of a gothic narrative. In this, the film does provide the viewer with a relatively easy starting point; its period setting amplifies its connection to its predecessors, as well as the societal pressures and systemic violence that it aims to challenge. It allows the audience to perceive the story through a historical lens that comes pre-installed, as a sort of short-cut to the genre's original social context.

The context, in this case, consists of misogyny, queerphobia, xenophobia, and ableism - which, while rampant even in the modern day, were that much more blatant in 1830s German Confederation, where/when the story largely takes place. Every human character, regardless of who they are, is influenced by these oppressive aspects of their society; and Ellen Hutter is hopelessly entrapped within all four.

Her social situation, as we are given to understand, is precarious. Though she was originally born into wealth, she married down to escape her abusive father. She is an eccentric - her "wild" inclinations (such as having a sense of dignity or loving the outdoors as a child) are enough to cause almost vitriolic disapproval; but on top of that, she was born with a psychic gift, which manifests in a way that is not dissimilar from a mental (and sometimes physical) disability. She and her husband are also English immigrants, and thus perpetual outsiders in Wisborg (this is also one of the reasons Thomas is so anxious to prove himself at Knock's firm, and so keen to emulate Harding in all things); and, finally, she implied to experience queer attraction - which, though non-explicit, repressed, and never truly indulged, still affects her and the way she is continuously treated throughout the film.

Overall, Ellen's existence is perceived, at best, as an inconvenience - and at worst, a scandal. With that, she fits seamlessly into her story's genre.

The "immoral," the forbidden, the taboo is a cornerstone of all gothic fiction. It exists in the doubt between light and dark, harm and desire, love and abuse. It is the domain of sympathetic villains (e.g. Heathcliff, Wuthering Heights), of imperfect victims (Bertha Mason, Jane Eyre), of heroes who are deeply flawed, who cause their own tragedies, and often fail to save anyone at all (Victor Frankenstein, Frankenstein). Within the gothic genre, there are no absolutes; and its contradicting balance of dichotomies provides a reference point - or, more accurately, a cultural triangulation - for exploring the same complexities that a binary puritanical mindset strives to eradicate. These include sexual desire, female autonomy, physical and mental disabilities, classism; in short, anything that gets people wincing.

The popular discussion of these topics is frequently cruel, often avoidant, and rarely straightforward or productive. As stated above, it makes people uncomfortable. It's not pleasant. However, for Ellen (and many people in the real world), it is, quite literally, impossible to avoid. It defines every aspect of her daily life.

What this means for her and for the story is that within a narrative that refuses to gloss over the imperfections of her surrounding society, her victimhood is not thrust upon her by a shadowy figure, emerging from the night. Instead, she is a victim - of an ongoing and systemic, rather than individual, abuse.

This aspect of Ellen's characterization lies at the core of her behaviour throughout the film. She is an unstable chimera of Brontë's Jane Eyre and Bertha Mason - in the sense that her actions are informed, in great part, by her acute awareness of her own disenfranchisement. She alternates between anguished raving and phlegmatic practicality, used to her pain but unable to entirely ignore it; and, the same way that Jane sees all the rage she feels (but cannot afford to express) manifested in Bertha, Ellen finds her counterpart in Orlok.

This is where the ambiguity begins.

Even though Orlok is most certainly a gothic villain, his relationship with Ellen cannot be interpreted as strictly adversarial. Naturally, it would be easy to ascribe their dynamic to grooming and PTSD; however, as previously mentioned, a gothic narrative is never surface-level - and the film itself never furnishes any information that would definitively limit it to that.

Firstly, to get the primary discourse point out of the way - yes, when Ellen and Orlok first meet within the ether, she is indeed young; and later, she is said to have been a child. However, at the time, the term "teenager"did not yet exist; Ellen's younger self is not portrayed by a child actress; and later, in 1838, she is referred to as a child multiple times - despite being an adult, married woman. Overall, within the film, the term is more often used to describe innocence and inexperience, rather than age; and her initial age is never specified. Granted, a multi-century age gap is not exactly "healthy" anyway - but this is a vampire story. It is per the course; and it complicates their relationship beyond a simple victim vs abuser narrative.

Secondly - and perhaps, most importantly - the overall impact of Orlok's coercion tactics falls flat in comparison to Ellen's human-world alternatives. Yes, he argues and threatens; but her social circumstances have never allowed her agency in the first place. Her father abuses, isolates, and threatens to institutionalize her; Thomas dismisses her concerns as "childish fantasies"; Harding and Sievers tie her down and drug her; Harding again kicks her out of the house. Her marriage, her friendships, are therefore all transactional; they grant her an escape from her father's house, relative financial stability, social support - on the condition that she represses her true self, pretends to be normal, doesn't threaten anyone's masculinity or heterosexuality, and acts like she's happy to be a deferring, obedient, settled wife. Being a daughter of a landed gentleman, she would never have been given a working woman's education, and evidently has no income of her own; and so, she has no options except to upkeep her end of the bargain - which means that her continued survival within mainstream society relies on constant background coercion.

Compared to this mundane, socially acceptable horror of her existence, the vampire actually offers her more autonomy than she is ever otherwise accorded. The terms of his covenant never threaten Ellen's own well-being; so on one hand, she has benevolence - and on the other, the dignity of choice.

This contrast lies at the heart of her dilemma. Ellen is torn between what she believes she should be and what she knows - and Orlok knows - she is.

One is "correct," moral, Good; the other is "wrong," sinful, Evil. However, at the same time, the first is manufactured; it is artificially designed, and must be continuously enforced. The second is primal. Natural. In accordance with gothic tradition, the appeal of Orlok is that he is forbidden, yet instinctive. By design, he is a reflection of everything that Ellen is forced to repress on a daily basis. That includes her rage, her ostracism, her abnormalities; but also, her desperate need to be respected, understood, and desired. He is both grotesque and alluring, both a lord and a beast, both cruel and reverent.

"He is my melancholy!.." cries Ellen.

"I am Heathcliff!" whispers Cathy.

Still, while Cathy and Heathcliff are primarily divided by class and racism, Orlok and Ellen are separated by moral considerations. In the explicit sense, Ellen cannot choose the Evil that Orlok represents. Within the surface narrative, she is obligated by her society, her morals, and the story to choose Good - in this case, by nobly sacrificing her individual expendable life to save her husband and a city full of people. Her primary storyline, like everything else, has already been decided for her.

For the Trekkies among us, this is Ellen's own Kobayashi Maru. A no-win scenario. As such, within the context of character analysis, her destination does not matter as much as the little things she does along the way; and it is no accident that, as the film progresses, the subtler, seemingly insignificant choices she makes within that framework just happen to bring her closer - and closer - to Orlok.

All of them are just innocuous enough to almost pass. She places a lock of perfumed hair in a locket that she gives to Thomas - and upon his arrival to the Carpathians, the same locket is immediately claimed by Orlok, who recognizes the scent of lilacs. Before making her sacrifice, she puts on her wedding dress and finds a bouquet of the same flowers - which is the sort of effort she didn't have to perform, especially given that he cannot resist her blood regardless. When Orlok arrives, she chooses to undress them both, and leads him to the bed, even though her previous sex scene with Thomas was entirely clothed; and in the morning, she pulls him close and holds him through the sunrise - even though he was already dying, and would not be able to escape. There was no need for her to touch his rotting flesh at that point, much less caress it.

There can be a "moral" explanation for all these actions; but the lack of direct obligation involved in them becomes increasingly blatant over the course of the story, and the doubt festers.

This sort of lingering ambiguity is precisely where gothic horror thrives - and intersects, scandalously, with romance. Gothic horror, much like bodice-ripper novels, noir thrillers, or "dark romance," builds much of its romantic intensity on the dichotomy of shame and desire. Imagine it, if you will, as a loom; warp and weft. It may even be described as literary BDSM - a continuous, mutually-agreed-upon act of roleplay between the author and their audience, and sometimes the characters themselves (though that depends). The point is to create an outlet for female, queer, or disabled sexualities, all of which are still heavily medicalized and restricted, derided, or denied entirely; and within these often intersecting genres, the violent or coercive intensity of the dominant lead (be it a vampire, a mafia don, or simply a more experienced lesbian) provides their repressed, seemingly passive counterpart an excuse to act upon their demonized erotic urges.

Between the page and the mind, everything that normally complicates a romantic or sexual encounter in the real world (subliminal hints, aggression, repressed and involuntary responses) becomes set dressing - serving to place a particular scene or dynamic within its fictional universe. The resulting Watsonian uncertainty is, naturally, part of the appeal. It is what allows the viewer/reader/listener a sincere emotional and sensual immersion; and for Ellen and Orlok, it provides an appropriately dramatic pretext for a night of tender vampire sex.

The discourse around their joining is painfully similar to the same that drifts around online every winter - in regards to the classic holiday hit, Baby it's Cold Outside. The song, written during an era in which extramarital sexuality was heavily restricted, follows a couple brainstorming excuses for the lady to stay the night; this intention was explicitly stated by both members of the original duet; but that hasn't stopped thousands of people from interpreting it as a "rape anthem." It is unsurprising, then, that an element of horror (guilt, shame, repression, coercion) muddles the water even further.

It's oddly apt, considering that the film premiered on Christmas Day.

Granted, I am not denying that there is an abusive aspect to Ellen and Orlok's connection, romantic or otherwise. However, to reduce Ellen to merely his "victim" is extremely inaccurate to her actual portrayal - because, within the framework of the film, her interactions with Orlok are the few in which she is actually able to exercise some form of agency. She never defers to him, their wedding-death hinges on her free will, as coerced as it may appear; and, in a fascinating subversion of a popular vampire trope, she is the one who summons him.

In gothic media, "Come to me!.." is invariably spoken by a vampire (or a vampire derivative like Erik, Leroux's titular Phantom of the Opera); their counterpart follows helplessly, without question; and giving these lines to Ellen is a dramatic deviation from tradition that fundamentally alters the underlying context of their power balance. By maintaining this call-and-response dynamic throughout the story, Eggers asserts that Ellen isn't helpless; and neither is she "in over her head." She is intelligent, powerful, and she has a tangible influence over Orlok, who is her only equal - which is why, ultimately, she is the one deciding where that relationship is headed.

That is not to say that any alternative readings of the film are entirely incorrect. As I have stated above, the abusive/toxic narrative is definitely present, and even essential, in gothic media. On the Doylist level, it is the equivalent of a whip, or a solid pair of cuffs - essentially, a divestment of responsibility; though, to continue the metaphor, not everyone shares the same kink - and those who do might not all enjoy it the same way, so there's definitely significant variation. What I am trying to say, however, is that each story does come with a central conflict; and Ellen Hutter's victimization - much like Jane Eyre's, like Thomasin's (The Witch, 2015) - is systemic.

She is ostracized, disrespected - infantilized if her oppressors are feeling benevolent, demonized when they are inconvenienced - and still expected to always prioritize her husband/friends/community by default, regardless of how she is treated by them. Her surrounding society, morality, religion, culture all insist upon the same; and this is why, despite knowing that she has done nothing wrong by following her nature, she carries an enormous amount of guilt in regards to those "unacceptable" aspects of herself. It is also the same reason why Orlok - the sensual, cruel, utterly devoted monster - is the answer to her lonely call; and the reason why everyone around her is so eager to see her as his victim, rather than a victim of anything they may have perpetrated themselves. Ellen's is a rich complexity, fed upon centuries' worth of gothic tradition, and she cannot be forced into a flat, genre-inappropriate simplification.

Like The Witch, like NBC Hannibal, like Interview With the Vampire before it - Nosferatu (2024) is a story of self-indulgence being so unfamiliar that it feels like a sin; or, like dying.

I, for one, would not deny her that.

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blastzachilles · 24 days ago

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meet… STANFORD ERA LESBIAN!ATP .ᐟ ★

a/n: hi guys the much promised part two of lesbian!atp headcanons… stanford edition! so sorry it took me three weeks to get these out i am in an insane slump right now…… i’ll be free soon (hopefully) i have so much i want to get out. and also thank you @peariote some of these are taken from conversations we have had… and thank you @diyasgarden my lovely for helping me flesh out tashi. anyway. please enjoy. smiles.

CW: hints at nsfw

ART - VISUAL ARTS MAJOR .ᐟ

– VISUAL ARTS MAJOR ART who swears you’re her muse. Always begging you to let her use you as a model for whatever she’s working on, he’s positive her work simply turns out better when it’s of you. Nevermind the fact you’re almost always nude.

– VISUAL ARTS MAJOR ART who is always covered in charcoal and paint, to the point he’s like a magnet. Even if she’s not doing a project with those mediums, it still finds its way onto him. Little do you know it’s because you said you loved the way she looks with it one day, and she’s never looked back.

– VISUAL ARTS MAJOR ART who loves that he has to learn photography because it means she can always capture moments of you for forever. Always has a camera on him whenever he’s with you to make sure she doesn’t miss anything. Anything from being in the shower to falling apart under her. She even teaches you photography just so you can take photos of her between your thighs or when her hands are too busy elsewhere to hold a camera.

– VISUAL ARTS MAJOR ART whose exhibitions always feature at least one piece of you, whether it be painting, photo, or sculpture, and are always dedicated to you. Whenever he sneaks you in for ‘early access,’ he always shows you these with the biggest grin on her face. She swears one day he’s going to do an exhibition solely of you (Never including the nude pieces. Those are hers and hers only). You know she will.

PAT - FINANCE MAJOR .ᐟ

– FINANCE MAJOR PAT who went into finance for his parents, who want her to take over after graduating. He absolutely hates it, but listens and goes for the four years anyway. Their grades are average, simply because she cannot care enough to do more than scrape by. Despite the hatred, she still becomes the biggest finance bro possible.

– FINANCE MAJOR PAT who has in fact been attempted to be recruited to a frat before. Walking past a tent during rush week had them handing him a form until they opened their mouth and spoke. This is his favourite story to tell when trying to get someone into her bed (“Come on, I was basically a frat brother. I can show you a good time too.”).

– FINANCE MAJOR PAT who is somehow at a new party every night. Brings a new girl home every night too, partially in thanks to the frat story above. Is known around campus for being the biggest sleazebag ever, but no one really cares if it means they get a night with her.

– FINANCE MAJOR PAT who meets you and decides maybe you can change them. A one night stand where you treat her the best he’s ever been treated absolutely changes her world, and one night turns into two, and then three, and then she decides maybe there is more to life than just sleeping around and finally locks you down for herself (but it does take time for her to get used to just the one person, and there are some flirting incidents in the beginning).

TASHI - COGNITIVE SCIENCE MAJOR .ᐟ

– COG SCI MAJOR TASHI who is the most disciplined person in college. Like poster girl of discipline level discipline. She creates a schedule and actually sticks to it. As you spend more time with her, you eventually catch onto it as well, and start doing most things together.

– COG SCI MAJOR TASHI who is incredibly dedicated to her studies. One of the top students in her classes. She is always studying whenever she has time, but hates not being around you. Her favourite kind of date is studying with you at a library or cafe, where she doesn’t need to choose between you and her work.

– COG SCI MAJOR TASHI whose favourite courses are the natural sciences, particularly chemistry and biology. Something about learning how the body’s natural chemicals and processes draws her in, but she wants to make a difference with it, to make it mean something. So she minors in sociology alongside cog sci.

– COG SCI MAJOR TASHI who eventually takes the MD and PhD route, so she can do research and help in a medical setting. She spends her time in class one day, volunteering at a hospital and shadowing a doctor the next, and uses what she learns to do exactly what she wanted to. To do something bigger than herself.

tag list: @artstennisracket @glassmermaids @jordiemeow @cha11engers @kaalxpsia @apatheticrater @tacobacoyeet @tigerlilywl @newrochellechallenger2019 @compress1repress @artspats

want to join my tag list? fill out this form!

#blastz writes .ᐟ #lesbian challengers .ᐟ #dividers by me .ᐟ #challengers #art donaldson #patrick zweig #tashi duncan #so sorry again for taking THREE WEEKS TO POST THIS. my bad #can you tell who i've thought the most about.

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roryknightwrites · 1 year ago

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Reo Mikage is Actually Great BPD Representation- Some Thoughts

So I had the extremely unfortunate experience of being exposed to Blue Lock (unfortunate because it's all my tiny pea brain can think about now), and while it is absolutely full of silly guys whose brains I want to pick, this little bugger really stood out to me. The second he came onto the screen, I KNEW I smelled the borderline on him. As I watched the series and read the manga, I noticed he is actually an incredibly well-written depiction of someone struggling with BPD. Reo is a super layered character and my favorite hobby is picking apart those layers and yapping incessantly about them, so here we are. I want to write this analysis for a few reasons:

1.) Too many people misunderstand Reo and categorize him as dramatic or childish without any elaboration and he deserves a proper character deep-dive. I think him being borderline explains a LOT of his reactions/choices throughout the story.

2.) Borderline representation is extremely important to me. I'm diagnosed borderline and have struggled with this disorder for around ten years now, so I get really excited when I spy BPD-coded characters (especially if they're likable people and not just ghoulish irredeemable villains or manic pixie dream girl characters). This disorder can be so isolating, especially when the majority of people will never even bother to research or understand it. I know that some people like to chalk Reo's emotional reactions up to him being a moody 17-year-old, but I think I have enough evidence to prove that this is undiagnosed BPD that's festering in his noggin. Not to mention, literally nobody else acts like this in the series. Reo is incredibly unique and distinct in the way he behaves through this narrative and I think it's way past the point of normal teenage angst. Regardless, believe what you want. He'll always be borderline to me tho <3

3.) I have a master's degree in English and what good is that if I don't write long, painful, pointless essays on anime guys? Not that this is exceptionally well written, I just like to laugh at myself for getting a whole M.A and then this is the shit I publish online lmao

By the end of this, I hope I can shed some light on wtf is going on inside of Reo's silly little head. (I'm also obviously not a psychologist, don't use any of this to diagnose yourself pls I don't need the scandal)

If you want to read, buckle up, because this is gonna be a long one!

First, let me define BPD- It's a personality disorder characterized by a long-standing pattern of instability in mood, interpersonal relationships, and self-image. At its core, it is a disorder categorized by emotional dysregulation (the inability to regulate one's emotional responses) People with BPD feel everything EXTREMELY hard. That's important to keep in mind IMO, because while their reactions may seem dramatic or extreme, what they're feeling IS dramatic and extreme. Everything they're feeling is amplified, so their reactions are amplified. Obviously from the outside, people assume it's an overreaction since they can't see what's going on inside the borderline's head. When you sit down and dissect the thought process of someone like Reo, it becomes a lot easier to understand why they react the way that they do to certain situations.

(Also, I'm not going to reiterate more than once that an explanation is not an excuse to treat people poorly. I cannot read ANYTHING on BPD without hearing every 2 minutes how the disorder isn't an excuse to hurt other people. We get it!! I'm explaining it, not excusing it. This enter essay is an analysis of why someone acts the way they do, not whether or not it's excusable)

So then, what behaviors/signs does somebody need to exhibit to receive a borderline diagnosis? The 9 diagnostic criteria for BPD are as follows:

1. Fear of abandonment

2. Unstable or changing relationships

3. Unstable self-image; struggles with identity or sense of self

4. Impulsive or self-damaging behaviors

5. Suicidal behavior or self-injury

6. Varied or random mood swings

7. Constant feelings of worthlessness or sadness

8. Problems with anger, including frequent loss of temper or physical fights

9. Stress-related paranoia or loss of contact with reality

Someone would only need 5 of these to receive a proper diagnosis. Just with the main story and the spin-off manga that is currently released, I think I have enough evidence to argue that Reo has 8 out of 9 criteria for a BPD diagnosis. For the sake of organization, I’m gonna group some of those together though, indicated by a + symbol. I also want to define a few important terms before I start yapping, so that y'all without BPD can understand wtf I'm even talking about.

Favorite Person (fp) - This is someone who holds massive significance in a borderline's life. They emotionally depend on this person a lot and to a certain extent, their worldview almost revolves around them.

Splitting- the change in perception of someone or something caused by black-or-white thinking or dichotomous thinking. It is the devaluation of someone who was once idealized and vice versa.

Mirroring (aka: the chameleon effect)- the constant, unconscious change in one's identity or sense of self by imitating another person’s behaviors, characteristics, or traits. It is common in people who have a vacant or distorted self-image which is a general symptom of BPD.

Now, time for me to break down the most prominent moments where Reo showcases borderline behavior. As I mentioned, I'm going to try and organize this under each criteria point (with some being grouped together)

Unstable self-image; struggles with identity or sense of self:

Before I delve into Reo's relationships, I want to start with his baseline sense of identity. It’s established early on that Reo is a very bored, empty, unsatisfied person. Nothing excites him, nothing motivates him, and everything is handed to him. He’s frustrated because his parents notoriously try and buy his affection even though he doesn't want anything. For most of his life up until the narrative starts, he's wandering through life empty and frustrated. That is, until he finally sets his sights on soccer and decides to dedicate his life to winning the World Cup:

The wording, 'proves my existence' is interesting here. I think this is the first instance Reo has felt alive. So far, the only notable thing about him has been his family and his money. He hasn't achieved anything exceptional for himself, but now he has that opportunity. With this goal, he can really build something up from nothing and make it his own. It's almost like he's clinging to this dream to prove that he has some purpose in his life other than being the family heir.

Now, this dream changes when he meets Nagi, of course. I'm not gonna focus too much on their relationship in this section, but I will mention that meeting Nagi shifted Reo's entire dream, and not for the better. Through the narrative, his dream went from:

Winning the World Cup

Winning the World Cup with Nagi

Proving to Nagi that leaving him behind was a mistake

Improving himself and becoming a good striker on his own

Being a tool for Nagi to become the best striker

Had Nagi not come in and ask for Reo to come back to him, I think Reo could have done a great job at establishing his own sense of identity without Nagi. But no matter how much he works on himself, with Nagi in the picture, he's never going to value himself more than Nagi. Reo lets Nagi cloud his identity to the point where Isagi calls him out and asks what he's even doing at Blue Lock in the first place, since he clearly can't survive on his own, he needs Nagi with him.

After dealing with the turmoil of being abandoned by Nagi, Reo goes through a few stages. He starts with wanting to become somebody worthy of being beside Nagi, somebody that Nagi would want to choose. Devoting himself to becoming stronger and more versatile, his end goal is to have Nagi realize he made a mistake by leaving him behind. After a few more matches, Reo starts to realize that he needs to grow and change and become a stronger, better version of himself for himself and not for other people.

He decides that the fight was all his fault to begin with, that he should have never forced Nagi to play soccer and now he is going to get back to what his dream was originally, combined with his new desire to be a stand-alone player (and person, for that matter). Reo accepts the mistakes that he made, admits that he shouldn't have forced his ideals onto Nagi, and resolves to become a better person for HIMSELF. That's excellent!

Of course, Reo can't be happy for TOO long. Nagi comes out of the woodwork saying that he can't beat Isagi on his own and asks for Reo's help. Reo does stand up for himself a bit, saying that Nagi is being inconsiderate of his feelings and mentioning how long it took for him to recover from Nagi leaving. Now, the BPD trait here is how Reo not only forgives Nagi and is jumping on him and hugging him THE NEXT PAGE, but he also just disregards everything he said in this sequence. In a matter of two minutes, he no longer wants to be a player that can fight on his own or improve for himself, he wants to improve for Nagi. He starts ruminating again about how hurt he was when Nagi left, but now he's saying all of it wasn't so that he could get stronger individually, it was so that he could be reunited with Nagi again. Nagi asking for his help and saying that now they can play together again motivate Reo more than anything we've seen so far. (Nagi notoriously throws Reo little affection crumbs like this that Reo eats up, but I'm not trying focus on that) Now, Reo's alright with being a tool for Nagi's success again. Everything that happened was supposed to make him stronger so he could be a better partner to Nagi, right? Reo also says as the chapter ends, to please let him be a part of Nagi's dream until Nagi becomes the world's best striker. That's literally so sad!

He's also immediately back to the 'our' 'we' 'us' talk as well. If he can master his chameleon style in order to keep Nagi above the rest of the players, he wont get left behind again. If he devotes his time and energy into being a solo striker like the rest of these guys, Reo knows that he wont be able to keep up. This was always supposed to be his role, right? Building Nagi up to his full potential! :*)

I also like the detail that Reo is back to hugging Nagi and holding him, but Nagi never really touches him back. I think Reo's love language is touch for sure, not that it's incredibly relevant, but I do think it shows that Reo is back to being 100% comfortable around Nagi as if their fight never happened. I hear a lot of fans asking how Reo could have forgiven Nagi so easily, and I say this with my entire chest, it's the BPD. The black-and-white thinking combined with Nagi being Reo's fp and the excruciating pain of being abandoned by him in the first place ?? Of course he's going to take him back. Also, I've seen people blame Reo for not saying no to Nagi when he asks for help and I have to say that is an absolutely insane take. How are we gonna look at a panel where Nagi asks for help and then blame Reo for helping him?? I'm not going to focus on it too much in this post but in my opinion, it is crazy how little accountability both the narrative + fans give Nagi. Reo is pegged as responsible for both of their downfalls and it's nuts tbh.

Currently in the story, I think Reo's identity is still centered around Nagi. It's really easy for borderlines to structure their entire lives and personalities around their favorite person, but I can only hope that these two keep having open and honest discussions with one another. Hopefully, Reo will eventually learn that he can exist without Nagi and that he's more than just 'his arms and legs'.

Unstable or Changing Relationships:

The most notable relationship in Reo's life is Nagi. They're both each other's first real friends, which already sets up a less-than-ideal dynamic. Nagi has no idea how to communicate and he has pretty weak emotional intelligence. On the other hand, Reo is great at communicating, but he isn't used to regulating his emotions. For a lot of borderlines, they can go a very long time without experiencing any symptoms when they don't have a favorite person. When you think about it, the bulk of the disorder is shown through those interactions with other people. If Reo has never had a real friend in his life, I don't think he'd be used to the emotional turmoil that comes with having a fp.

The minute Reo meets Nagi, he's attached. All his classmates notice it, too. They question why Reo is suddenly so obsessed with this random kid who has no interest in him. Reo is ignoring everybody that isnt Nagi.

Very quickly, Reo boils down his view of the world to being him and Nagi versus everybody else, and he makes that very clear. It also depicts something that I think is incredibly crucial to Reo’s character that a lot of people overlook; as Nagi develops to be Reo’s favorite person, Reo’s dream isnt ‘playing soccer’ anymore. It’s Nagi. It’s being with Nagi, playing soccer with Nagi, being useful to Nagi, taking care of Nagi, and being somebody important to Nagi. He doesnt teach Nagi the rules or how to actually play, he teaches Nagi how to play with him. He literally re-writes and re-structures the game so that it can center around him and Nagi. Nagi calls him out on this in the spin-off manga:

Reo doesnt care about the structure of the game, he cares about Nagi. The other people on the field don't matter. The other team doesn't matter. He also starts to unknowingly put Nagi up on a pedestal, which is another borderline trait. He starts reiterating that Nagi is special, he's different from everybody else, he's destined to achieve great things. The more he raises Nagi up, the more he isolates the two of them in his mind, reiterating the idea that it's them against everybody else. His language reflects this too: Reo exclusively talks with 'us' 'we' 'our', insinuating that they're going to do everything together.

When Ego says that there can't be two winners, Reo says that he'll make Nagi the best striker. His 'ego' will be making Nagi successful. Along with putting Nagi on this pedestal, Reo also very early on establishes the fact that he'd pick Nagi over himself any day of the week. He's the only person in Blue Lock who really couldn't care less about becoming a striker himself: his dream is to be a tool in Nagi's success. Or, in simpler terms, he wants to be useful and make Nagi happy.

These two were in trouble from the very beginning. Nagi is lazy as all hell, has 0 motivation to do anything, and his dream is to live a life of luxury and never have to work. Reo, being the borderline baddie that he is, is more than happy to do EVERYTHING for Nagi. Borderlines love extremely hard! It's one of our best traits and I think it's important to showcase that Reo is a massive sweetheart at his core. He clearly loves Nagi a lot and goes to extreme lengths to make sure he feels taken care of. To someone with BPD, NOTHING is too big of an ask for a person they love, especially if that person is their fp. I also disagree with the argument that Reo 'made' Nagi codependent. Nagi likes being taken care of, he says it all the time. If you ask me, I would actually argue that Nagi takes advantage of Reo a little bit because he knows that Reo will do anything for him. But regardless, I think that Reo starts to develop an unspoken expectation with Nagi that he'll provide him with everything he needs, and in turn, Nagi will stick around. I don't think he's doing this intentionally, nor do I think it's being done in a manipulative way. I just think that Reo has a dormant fear of being abandoned that he doesn't totally know he has yet.

It isn't just Nagi that Reo showcases having unstable relationships with, though. Zantetsu is another good example. Reo starts out disliking Zantetsu, he snaps at him a couple times, and calls him a moron more than once. He starts to warm up to him because Nagi tells him to. The favorite person has MASSIVE sway in the borderline's life. If Nagi likes someone, Reo likes them too. (This is, of course, on the condition that they aren't a threat, looking at you Isagi).

In the immediate next chapter, Reo is acting like they're all best friends. He's climbing on top of them in their big bed, saying that the three of them are gonna win their matches, being a little pookie. He goes from not liking this guy at all to considering him one of his close friends super fast. Also on the topic of Isagi, when they're making up the teams for the second selection, Nagi doesn't initially want to tell Reo that he wants Isagi on their team bc he's worried Reo will be upset. But, when he does finally say it, Reo is literally fine with it because like I said, who Nagi likes, Reo likes! On the condition that they don't replace Reo, which clearly happened soon after.

On the opposite side of the spectrum, Reo also shows how he can go from loving someone to despising him very quickly. After Chigiri and Kunigami tell him to get back up in the game post-Nagi's abandonment, we can literally see the switch flip in Reo's head:

Suddenly, he hates Nagi. Nagi's a jerk who abandoned him; he never cared about him, and he threw him away. Dude literally says "Let's kill the bastards that betrayed us". This act of unintentional devaluing is called splitting. What Reo's essentially doing is going from one extreme to the other: if Nagi isn't his perfect treasure, he's the devil that broke his heart. There's no room for a grey area. The reasoning behind borderline's developing this black-and-white mindset is rooted in self-defense. If Reo devalues Nagi into being nothing more than a traitor, then he's stripping away the power that Nagi has to hurt him. If he looks at him like a rival or a villain, it's protecting him from being hurt by Nagi again.

That doesn't mean that he genuinely believes any of this, more so, he's trying to convince himself that it's true. We see that at his core, the reason he's acting like this is because he's hurt. I'll go more into it later on, but he's constantly thinking, what does Isagi have that I don't? What do I have to do in order to win Nagi back? This black-and-white thinking is an automatic self-defense mechanism that I think he's doing subconsciously. Regardless, the shifting he's doing here can cause a little whiplash, which brings me to:

Varied or random mood swings + Problems with anger, including frequent loss of temper or physical fights:

I can’t think of a better way to describe Reo's temperament than the wiki, so let me quote it: "Generally, he seems to feel every emotion with full force and is extremely aware of his own faults and shortcomings, which is evident in several instances of painful breakdowns shown in the spin-off manga. Due to his high emotionality, he can even get violent when he loses his temper."

Reo is characterized as being emotionally unstable. When he's happy, he's elated! When he's sad, he's miserable. There are a ton of scenes between the manga and spin-off manga that show how fast his emotions can flip, but this one was one of my personal favorites:

In this scene, Reo has developed a little scheme in the dining hall where the guys are trading their side dishes. At face value, a throwaway moment. But, I think it's worth looking at because not only does this show Reo's emotional response being triggered in an opposite, semi-extreme direction, but the root cause for the reaction was that he felt rejected by Zantetsu. In his own weird way, he's asking Zantetsu to come over and hang out with him. He's not being exceptionally clear with that message, but I can still pick up on it. "You wanna join in, don't you?" He's extending the invite, making himself vulnerable, and Zantetsu shoots him down by saying nah, I'm fine with my noodles. Reo JUMPS on him like YOU KNOW WHAT? I TOOK THAT PERSONALLY! lol. Jokes aside, I think this moment is a great one to argue Reo's BPD tendencies because it's such a seemingly mundane interaction. Even Zantetsu is surprised by Reo's random outburst. This also sets up the fact that one of Reo's most obvious triggers is being rejected/abandoned/betrayed, an extremely common one between those of us with BPD.

Other instances of Reo having a bad temper are a lot more obvious. In the match against teams V and Z, Reo straight up elbows Raichi in the throat, and then tries to go throw hands with Kuon for hurting Nagi. He only stops because if he gets into any more fights, he’ll get thrown out of the game and won't be able to play with Nagi anymore. He’s visibly pissed though and calls Team Z a joke. Hell, even Reo himself can recognize on a certain level that he can't control his emotions: they control him. They cloud his judgment and make him react in ways that he wish he didn't.

He is constantly plagued by these extreme emotional reactions that are out of his control. Not to say that people with BPD are unable to ever control their emotions, because we can! It takes time and therapy and practice though, which Reo hasn't had. His lack of regulation is also why he has such a dramatic and extreme meltdown when Nagi abandons him.

Fear of Abandonment:

Reo's biggest trigger and the cause of his inner turmoil throughout Blue Lock is his fear of abandonment. I mentioned before that I think he's had this fear dormant inside of him for a while as so many borderlines do, since he hasn't had the chance to experience it before. He alludes to it early on when they first arrive at Blue Lock:

The thought of leaving Nagi for somebody else? Reo considers that heartless. They came together, after all. They're going to win the world cup together. Nagi could break both of his legs and Reo wouldn't leave him, because again, Reo isn't there to team up with the best player and become the best striker in the world: he's there to play with Nagi!! And, like I said, in Reo's mind it's him and Nagi vs everyone else-

Reo exhibits a lot of signs early on of being jealous while they're playing in Blue Lock. I mean, as we discussed, everything should be focused around him and Nagi. When Nagi passes to Zantetsu in the team V and Y match, Reo pulls up like 'hey, why didn't you pass it to me?? ):' There are a lot of little moments like that, but Reo's jealousy is a lot more relevant to my argument after he gets abandoned by Nagi.

Let's talk about that word: abandoned. It seems dramatic, right? Reo uses that term constantly and exclusively. Every time he brings that moment up, he uses the word 'abandoned', or he'll say 'betrayed' or 'chose'. These are very definitive words. He’s not saying Nagi ditched him or flaked on him or blew him off, no; he has abandoned him. That word choice may seem disproportionate to the situation, but that's Reo's reality. This was the ultimate betrayal to him. The constant use of that vocabulary reiterates that in Reo's mind, there is no grey area. Either Nagi chooses him, or he chooses someone else. In choosing someone else, he abandons Reo. Reo is paranoid that Nagi isn't ever going to come back to him and it's because of something that Reo is lacking. How can Nagi like Isagi more than him, anyway?

Now, I do fault Nagi a bit for not communicating better at that moment. I understand that he's bad at communication, but I don't think Reo could have been more obviously upset if he tried. The dude was in TEARS. Nagi saw him devastated and then expected everything to be fine when he met him in the bathhouse? Idk. I'm going to give him the benefit of the doubt and say that he didn't realize it would upset Reo to such an extreme: maybe he thought that they would miss each other, but Reo wouldn't take it personally. I'm doing my best not to harp on Nagi since this is about Reo.

Abandonment is detrimental to people with BPD. It causes extreme inner turmoil that we see with Reo as the story progresses because it is the only thing he can think about. If he isn't trying to cover up his hurt feelings with this idea of revenge, he's self-destructing over being abandoned. He becomes obsessed with wondering why Nagi chose Isagi over him. Was there something wrong with him? Isagi isn't that impressive, why would Nagi rather be with him? These thoughts torture him endlessly and fuel his desire to 'steal' Nagi back. He literally says to Isagi, that he's going to steal Nagi back. Much to his dismay though, Reo starts to notice that Isagi is bringing out some positive traits in Nagi. Nagi's entire vibe is different with Isagi. Nagi is having fun playing soccer without Reo. In fact, he's having more fun. He's making plays he's never made before. His face is visibly different; he's more excited than before.

This is heartbreaking for Reo. Not only was he right that Isagi did have something to offer Nagi that he couldn't, but Reo is having a massive self-hate spiral during this point as well, so he's internalizing all of his flaws and mistakes while the thought is sitting in the back of his head: did Nagi actually have a good reason for abandoning me? Was I not enough to satisfy him? Did I only drag him down? This gets significantly worse the longer he watches Nagi and Isagi play:

Everything is falling apart. Nagi is doing completely fine without Reo, and Reo is an absolute mess. We're circling back to Reo's lack of identity here as well. He's watching firsthand that he's losing Nagi to Isagi: what does he do? What happens to him if he loses Nagi, who is he without Nagi? He's overwhelmed during this match and at one point Reo literally screams that he's going to tear apart their connection. Jealousy is consuming him, but it's also those feelings of inferiority and wondering if he really did deserve to be abandoned. If Nagi is so happy without him, maybe he really did have a reason. These are the thoughts that are circling around in Reo's head. Not to mention, he is constantly tortured by the flashbacks of Nagi leaving him, which I think is a great detail. Some readers might say it's just pointless recapping but I disagree, I think it's depicting how traumatic that was for Reo. As a borderline, being abandoned by your fp IS traumatic. Reo relives that moment so many times because so many things trigger it for him throughout Blue Lock. He can't even look at Chigiri and Kunigami without thinking about him and Nagi. It's a really devastating experience that quickly deteriorates him emotionally.

Constant feelings of worthlessness or sadness + Suicidal behavior or self-injury:

One of my favorite things about Reo is the fact that he is self-aware that he's behaving somewhat irrationally, but he doesn't know how to stop. When we look at one of the several times that Reo is curled up crying over Nagi, he mentions how he really did want to tell Nagi to go and have fun, but he didn't. He couldn't. The visuals shift for this too:

Reo doesnt want to be acting this way, but he can't help it, and that's frustrating to him. It makes him start feeling ashamed of himself. His inner thoughts start to spiral and he feels weak and alone. He's reflecting here on what his true feelings really were at that moment, and how scared and lonely and weak he felt as a result of Nagi leaving him behind.

These feelings quickly evolve into Reo feeling worthless and falling into bouts of self-hatred. He's so ashamed of the way he's feeling and behaving but it feels so out of his control. He says, "maybe if I hadn't gone to Blue Lock in the first place, I wouldn't have to experience this feeling." As I said before, borderline's feel things EXTREMELY intensely; the disorder is described as living with third-degree burns all over your body. Everything hurts. His feelings are so intense and all-consuming right now, it's all he can think about:

I saw some posts in the fandom reddit asking why Reo is acting like this. One in particular reads: "I get that he is betrayed and stuff but he is acting like it’s the end of the world, is it explained later why he acts like this? Is it because he doesn’t think he can win without Nagi?" Not to call this person out, I just want to answer the question in this post-

It has nothing to do with winning; it was never about winning. It was always about Nagi.

If we're looking at Reo through the borderline lens, it IS the end of the world for him. Nagi was his world. What's worse, he's fully aware that he's not acting rationally and he doesn't know why, which is making him feel ashamed and weak and embarrassed. Now I know why he's acting like this, but there are no Blue Lock psychiatrists sitting around to wack him with the mood stabilizers or the DBT handbook, so he's gonna stay feeling like a monster.

He lets these thoughts, along with the resentment and anger from being abandoned in the first place, fuel him for the second selection match. As he's watching the game play out, as Nagi is about to score the winning goal, Reo's mind starts racing with intrusive, negative thoughts.

He's praying that Nagi fails, that he gives up, that he stops trying, anything to stop that solidifying moment where he scores the winning goal and proves once and for all that not only was Reo not strong enough to stop him, but Nagi doesn't need him anymore. He catches himself really quickly, because he realizes he's sounding just like his parents. Everything is spinning out of control so bad, Reo wants Nagi to end up in a vulnerable position so that he isn't the only one falling apart. As he catches himself thinking this, he's disgusted with himself. He calls himself 'utter trash', and as he watches Nagi score the winning goal, he falls to his knees, wishing he was dead.

As he sits there decomposing in emotional turmoil and suicidal ideation, Nagi's team chooses Chigiri to join them, and it's the nail in the coffin. This is probably Reo's lowest point in the entire story IMO. Nagi comes up to compliment him on his plays and Reo shows us another classic borderline move: he's anticipating how bad it's going to hurt to be abandoned by Nagi again, so he's trying to push him away before it can happen. We see the dichotomy of his spoken words and inner thoughts here, where he's talking big game to Nagi, saying things like 'you clearly don't care about me anymore, you're throwing me away, if you're going to abandon me just do it properly', while internally he's thinking 'I'm the worst, I wish I was dead, please take this bait and break my heart so that I can self destruct in peace'.

i LOVE the visuals during this moment. This is what Reo thinks is his last line of defense, the last thing he can do to preserve any part of his dignity is to make Nagi hate him so that he'll stop throwing these crumbs of affection at him. It's also really telling that despite his switch in behavior and the devaluing of Nagi, the root of all of that is STILL that he was so hurt by the abandonment.

I don't think I need to analyze the suicidal ideation because he just straight up says he wants to die like three times in this scene but, aside from that, the visual of his inner thoughts vs what he's actually saying is so powerful. Not to mention the chameleon imagery which i'll geek out about in a second, this is another example of his black and white thinking along with the reiteration that being abandoned was literally traumatic for Reo: he says they can never go back to what they were before. Speaking as a borderline, this is painfully true. When people break my trust even in a small way, I can never view them the same as I used to. I can forgive them and let it go, but I'll never be as open with them as I once was. In Reo's shoes, he had Nagi up on this pedestal that he was perfect and would never do anything to hurt him, but he did hurt him (in the worst way possible).

After Nagi tells him he's a pain in the ass and that he doesn't care anymore, Reo thanks him for 'finishing him off'. In his mind, they're done now and he can suffer in peace and quiet without dragging Nagi down anymore.

Bonus Point: The Chameleon Effect

I LOVE THE FACT THAT HIS THING IS CHAMELEONS AHHHH

The chameleon imagery with Reo makes me INSANE dude. As I mentioned towards the beginning of this post, a part of borderline that is seldom talked about is the tendency to take on 'the chameleon effect', or mirror the people around them. REO'S ENTIRE THING IS CHAMELEONS LIKE BFFR ?? That image where he was trying to get Nagi to hate him, was before he even started using his chameleon style, it was just something the authors thought was necessary to include during Reo's mental breakdown. Aside from the cool imagery, his chameleon style is a reflection of his relationship with Nagi. He gets called a jack of all trades and a master of none early on in reference to how when he’s without Nagi, hes not really exceptional at anything. He never really took the time to master one specific thing because he was always so concerned with helping Nagi. This rings my BPD bell for a couple reasons: first of all, when you have no sense of identity and you’re worried it means you have no real personality ?? Steal one!! Take the closest person to you and copy that one. That’s something us baddies know VERY well. Also, think there’s something about you that your fp doesn’t like? Change it! You can morph into anything they want as long as it means they won’t leave you !! :*) Before he makes up with Nagi, he copies moves in hopes that it'll make him stronger and appear more desirable to Nagi. After they make up, he copies whoever he has to so that he can get Nagi to that goal and make himself useful, make himself somebody that Nagi wants to have around. It is a literal direct metaphor for him changing anything and everything about himself for Nagi and graaaahhhh it’s so cool

Reonagi ?? Some thoughts-

I want to close this yap session with my thoughts on Reonagi as a ship. I do think that they can work and I want to make that clear. I'm not on board with the 'borderlines arent capable of having loving and fulfilling relationships' crap. That being said, they both have to put in a bit of effort. Reo has already recognized a lot of his own issues. He admits that he was wrong for pushing his ideals onto Nagi, that he needs to let Nagi grow and be his own person, etc. Nagi really hasn't accepted any fault. I stand by the fact that Nagi needs to be more sensitive with Reo. Way too often when a relationship like this fails, all the blame is put on the one with borderline. I'm gonna be the outlier here and say that if Nagi cares about Reo, he needs to learn about Reo's triggers and be mindful of them. I'm not saying that since Reo is sensitive to abandonment that Nagi should just isolate himself from everybody else, but what I am saying is that when he's going to do something that doesn't involve Reo, he needs to learn how to communicate that he still loves and values Reo. "I'm gonna go play soccer with this person right now, but I haven't forgotten about our promise. When I come back, we can play together. I still love you and I'm not going to leave you for whoever tf I'm playing with rn." (sneaking that 'i love you' in bc like..they're literally canon at this point asdfghjkll) But, I do think that Nagi loves Reo and cares about him in his own way. The two of them just have to keep working on their communication skills. Nagi has the potential to have a hot rich husband who will literally bend over backward for him and buy him all the robux he could ever want, he's gotta put in a shred of effort!

I also like to think that Nagi didn’t totally get the fact that Reo doesn’t gaf about just playing soccer. Nagi thinks soccer is what they do together, it’s what makes reo happy, right? He’s always pushing him to train harder and take the game more seriously because he likes the sport, RIGHT? It would make perfect sense to go play with isagi so that he can get better at soccer and come back to reo a more improved player. Maybe that’s why he was surprised when Reo was so mad in the bathhouse, bc he wasn’t making the connection that Reo cares more about him than soccer. That Reo puts all that energy into him playing soccer because he thinks it’s something that they can have as their own, and once Nagi notices how good he is, he’ll start enjoying it and the two of them can hold hands and run around the soccer pitch!! I think Nagi missed that part tbh, and I don’t think he know that even now in the story. Maybe Reo doesn’t even notice it.

Anyway, a shameless plug to my reonagi playlist if that's your thing (i cooked with this one, i fear) https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5CsvSqmuI4cxOl1nTaV4GJ?si=737a0f21e0bd482a

Closing Thoughts:

Reo is a bpd baddie and I love him very much. I think he's a sensitive guy with a lot of feelings who would benefit from taking time to work through his trauma and his emotions. I hope that he eventually is able to build an identity for himself that doesn't involve Nagi, but baby steps, I suppose. I think Reo is a great balance of positive and negative borderline traits and he reads as a really believable and sympathetic character. He is, however, definitely that friend that you have to slap to stop them from running back to their ex.

Jokes aside though, BPD can be extremely hard to live with, even more so when it's undiagnosed and untreated. If someone you love has BPD, take the time to read up on it and do your best to understand them. I promise you, it will mean the world to them.

If you managed to get this far, thank you for reading! This was a messy stream of consciousness and I appreciate your support by listening.

#blue lock #reo mikage #reonagi #nagireo #nagi seishiro #bpd #reo mikage bpd

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bigfan-fanfic · 4 months ago

Text

Up for Debate (Male!Reader x Sam Winchester)

@magicstarbits How about college!Sam Winchester meet cute with male reader? Btw love all of your work (:💛

Sam has this in the bag.

With Halloween around the corner, the professor for his college Public Speaking and Debate course has decided to get playful.

She's set a challenge. The class has been set into pairs, each arguing opposite sides of a hypothetical legal case.

The catch is that the debate is over legal questions regarding different traditional Halloween monsters.

Sam has been assigned vampires, specifically the question of whether someone becoming a blood thrall should have any legal value in court in regards to property, protections, and marital status.

Sam is prepared to argue the relationship cannot be legally valid due to the inherent power balance of being in thrall to a vampire. And of course because vampires are, of course, monstrous.

He doesn't know his opponent well, so he makes a point to ask, and you two meet for lunch at a coffeeshop just off campus.

And just his luck, he slams right into you just outside, your books clattering to the ground with loud thuds, though he reaches out and catches you, leaning over you to leverage his own core to keep you from tumbling.

"Whoa! That's one way to win the debate!" you joke, and Sam starts to laugh as he helps you straighten and then you gather your things up together.

"Trust me, I like to win fair and square."

"I mean, you're... wow, you're... solid." you respond awkwardly, still marveling that this guy barely even budged when you ran into each other.

"I... used to play a lot of sports." Sam explains lamely, the excuse sounding weak. "My dad was really into that."

"Ah, okay. That makes sense."

"Hey, how about I treat you to lunch here then? I'd hate to knock you over AND make you pay."

"Not until the debate, right?"

"Exactly." Sam grins, and holds the door for you.

You two discuss the assignment, the sources you both are looking at, and then the conversation drifts to everything and anything.

Movie and book recommendations, hopes for the future, your majors, stories from being kids...

Before he knows it, Sam has spent two hours with you, your drinks and food long gone.

"This has been great!" you grin. "I do unfortunately have to get to class. Got a late lesson to catch."

Sam nods. "Well, can we do this again?"

A pause, a horrifying moment that Sam freaks out during, thinking he's overstepped.

"Absolutely. Here, I'll give you my number. Text me."

Sam is almost speechless as you put yourself in his contacts.

"I'll... run into you later." You tease. "Not literally next time."

"Y-yeah. Sorry again about that."

Sam cannot stop grinning.

The debate is fun as hell. He's surprised by the points you make, advocating for the need to grant legal protections to the thralls, in order to provide protections - you argue that these relationships will happen, and it's better to have something in place than nothing. If less than consensual, it gives the victims some protection. If fully consenting, it still provides some security.

He really likes your take on it, though he does his best to win.

And after meeting you at least once a week for a good long semester, he asks if you'd like to go on a real date.

You go driving to the beach late on the friday of a long weekend, and he takes you stargazing.

You lay together on the hood of the car, pointing up and making up constellations.

There aren't many stars, but that doesn't stop either of you.

And when he rolls over, shaggy hair brushing your forehead as he leans in, you lift your head up to meet him, lips brushing together before he cups the back of your head and you full on make out.

You give into to it, and you both spend a lovely night together, cementing each other as boyfriends.

His hand is almost always entwined with yours, loyal and sweet. He can't get enough of your kisses.

Because with every discussion, every debate...

...he falls in love even more.

#sam winchester x male reader #sam winchester x reader #supernatural x male reader #supernatural x reader #supernatural headcanons #headcanons

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lexirosewrites · 29 days ago

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I like the idea of like an omegas nest isn't just relegated to the bedroom or alphas den, sure that's the center of their nest & the area they fuss over the most in the day to day but I think tht in a modern society not worried abt which cave or group of trees will provide the best shelter tht the nest extends into the majority of the living space; the color of the walls, seating, throw blankets, the art & photos on said colorful walls, & for some omegas this feeling can even encompass basically the entire kitchen set up. All of tht is considered a part of their nest & a way to showcase their ability to care for their pack. it's a very flexible & permeable line tho bc an alphas den is also considered to extend to the larger living space now too but for many alphas this mostly translates into ensuring the space remains livable i.e. making sure whatever breaks gets fixed

All this to set up my omegaverse steddie mafia au thoughts

O!Steve as a struggling to get by elementary school art teacher (i cannot decide on an age group so he gets to work w all of them lol) who left the mob life behind after his parents disowned him when he graduated w his teaching degree & subsequently refused every alpha they tried to arrange a mating with

His best friend in the whole world A!Robin (who is a middle school band teacher) is adjacent to the mafia world Steve grew up in, her mom is a mob lawyer & stobin grew up as childhood friends.

They live together to handle rent being high + food costs r ridiculous on a band/art teachers salary & unfortunately this means neither is rlly able to properly nest/den beyond their bedrooms. Steve's nest is meager anyway since he threw out or burned everything w a scent on it from his "family" & Robin did the same.

Cut to:

Stobin r out one weekend at a sort of new club (it's been open almost a yr) just letting loose, they pregame at home & have bought a single drink each bc damn alcohol is expensive. When the two go together to the bathroom (bc srsly the bathroom when ur drunk w ur best friend just hits different) suddenly on their way out some bug burly guys r blocking their path & ushering them rather roughly into an "office" overlooking the club.

Where they meet the owner of the club & newest mob boss trying to expand his territory; Alpha Eddie "The Freak"

Eddie is intent on ransoming Steve & Robin to get the upper hand in a deal w Steve's parents... but when he meets Steve's eyes it's like everything fades away & all at once both of them know tht the other is their soulmate

Well...

Eddie still tries to ransom them (while also treating them both like honored guests as they stay at a safe house or something) but quickly learns tht the Harrington's & Robin's mom suck major ass & so he's just like... "Steve, Robin, do either of u care abt ur parents & their underlings?" Then proceeds to wipe out the entire Harrington family minus A!Carol Perkins who'd been covertly feeding Steve & Robin any info they needed to stay out of the Harrington parents grasp (I rlly like good friend Carol Perkins ok)

Shenanigans ensue bc I think it'd b kinda funny if this was a sweet fluffy kinda of story w like organized crime & murder happening in the background lol

crack ship a!carol/a!robin/a!chrissy happens bc Robin deserves it

then steddie court (eddie must get robin & carols seal of approval, he doesnt need it but he knows steve cares abt what the 2 alpha women think) then get married & mated & Steve is given free reign of like basically every home Eddie owns (which he immediately includes Steve on the deeds of plus buys a few places w only Steve on the deed) & Steve gets to nest like never before

He starts w the main residence they use most frequently: works w Eddie to change paint colors, buys the best quality nesting blankets/sheets/pillows & Eddie scents all of it with a single mindedness Steve just has to kiss him for, he gets to rearrange decor/art & include his meager knickknacks & buy new things to decorate with, he gets to repurpose an entire room into an art space at every residence. Slowly Steve works his way thru the homes in the US then moves on to the vacation home in Austria (idk I think Austria is beautiful)

When Steve becomes pregnant after a year of not trying followed by a yr of actively trying (2 yrs) the nesting goes into overdrive as he gets everything prepared for their baby, Eddie is not immune to this & his den instinct also goes into overdrive making him invest in all new security systems & testing said systems & he also rearranges the den in every residence while Steve directs him on where the furniture should move.

Then after 9 months of baby nesting & den making Steve has a home birth. On June 28th their little bundle comes into the world healthy & they name her Jolene Riot Munson

And they all lived happily ever after 🥰

nesting🥰🥰🥰

#slick sunday #steddie #steddie omegaverse #omega steve harrington #alpha eddie munson #steve x eddie #a/b/o #omegaverse #my asks #mpreg #cw mpreg #tw mpreg

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riselike-a-phoenix · 1 month ago

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I see many people still try to excuse the actions of Sakamaki brothers, so I want to say it once and for all

THEIR BEHAVIOUR IS UNEXCUSABLE!!!!

Do you hear me? No, it doesn't make it okay since they were abused themselves! No, their trauma doesn't excuse them abusing and killing all those girls!!! No, it doesn't excuse their treatment of Yui!!!!

Now, it's a different thing to explain WHY they are the way they are. But it is another to EXCUSE their behaviour with it!!!!

In their core, they are VAMPIRES. Demonic entities who do not posses much human emotions and empathy. And frankly, most of the boys are sadistic BY NATURE!! Just look at Shu and Reiji. True, Beatrix wasn't the warmest of mothers out there. But you can't say she was horrible, and you certainly cannot say that she is the one responsible for how cruel Shu and Reiji grew up to be. Reiji literally burned down an entire village AS A CHILD!!! A freaking child!!!

The triplets are of course the most traumatised, since their mother was Cordelia, and she was especially cruel and cold (and we all know what she did to each of her sons). But again, you cannot say that "well, it's normal that they treat girls like that, look at their childhood". No!! Their trauma doesn't make it okay for them to abuse and kill propably hundreds of teenage girls.

And lastly Subaru. Yeah, Christa wasn't a good mom. But then again, her own situation was very bad (still doesn't make it okay with how she treated her son) but at her core, I believe she loves Subaru. It's just unfortunate that he reminds her of Karl (whom she loves and hates at the same time).

But Subaru himself is....well....with him I always have these mixed feelings. Yeah, he's a tsundere, and he believes that nobody can love him and he should always be alone. BUT....he also killed some brides. And while some of them may have been accidents, some of them weren't. He has major anger issues, and is like a ticking bomb. One moment he's chill and can actually talk to you, and the next he's punching a hole in the wall (or your face). And again, I understand why he's like this, BUT....it doesn't make it okay for him to literally destroy anything and anyone in his reach......

And don't even get me started on the SA that they commit. Truly, Yui and the other brides go through some truly horrible SA in this story, and EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THE BOYS DO IT!!!!

And yeah, some are worse (Laito), but many of them still do it, whether coercion, manipulating or straight up R*PE, sometimes in front of the other guys. Sweet Jesus......

That is all, don't excuse their behaviour just because "they are hot". Theh are demons.

Peace

#dialovers #diabolik lovers #diabolik boys #diabolik brothers #shu sakamaki #reiji sakamaki #ayato sakamaki #laito sakamaki #kanato sakamaki #subaru sakamaki #beatrix sakamaki #cordelia sakamaki #christa sakamaki #yui komori

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hostess-of-horror · 3 months ago

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Turbo/King Candy x Reader Headcanons

💕🏎️🏁A Valentine's Day Special!🍭👑💕

Note: Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! I hope you're all doing well and I figured this would be the perfect time to contribute some headcanons to the Tumblr bandwagon. This is also my very first time writing about Turbo/King Candy in a more fanfiction sense, so please go easy on me!

@sneklover @tiramegtoons/@sliceoflifesalami @starleska @snailstrailz @starryside-1 @depressedasswarlock @crispytubes @pippengin @simpingforcys @blackthewolf17 and anyone else who wants to read this!

Content Includes: Gender Neutral Reader, Slight Suggestiveness but SFW in general, Possessiveness (not Yandere), major spoilers for Wreck-It-Ralph

Hey! Click on each name/title for a love song! (please don't judge me, this got kinda self-indulgent.)

Turbo

For starters, Turbo is... selfish at worst, misguided at best.

Yes, he eventually game-jumps and ends up getting RoadBlasters as well as his own game unplugged, but before all that, he was quite the "charmer."

To many within the Game Central Station, Turbo was insufferable or at least a little annoying. His arrogance was enough for them to steer clear of him, regardless of whatever shenanigans he was up to.

It was worse when it came to him falling for someone. Like, who would ever reciprocate any feelings for this guy?

You. The answer is you.

It caught everyone off guard, including Turbo, who used his signature racing puns as a pick-up line (and not even a good one at that).

Once you accepted, oh boy, was he thrilled!

After a good solid minute of showing off his victory to others at Tapper's, his usual cocky self faded as he realizes you are his now.

Like, truly his.

And with that realization, he is overwhelmed at the mere thought of you actually being his partner.

Turbo still likes being the Best Racer Ever and all that, but this time it's all for you - he just has to let you know that you are one lucky person, what with all the 1st Place victories and the trophies that came with them.

As much as he wants to maintain his "cool and popular" look, he can't help but cartoonishly swoon over you from time to time.

Sometimes, you would catch him staring at you with big ole' heart eyes or hear him giggle like a goofball whenever you're nearby.

He absolutely denies it afterward.

Turbo may not be the epitome of the word "Casanova" but what he lacks in smoothness he makes up for with cheesy puns.

Oh my gosh, you cannot get this man to shut up when it comes to his puns - absolutely loves plays on words!

And of course, they're all racecar themed.

But there are also moments where his puns are rather... risque~

It didn't matter where you two were, if Turbo is feeling particularly mischeivous or really lovey-dovey, he will try to fluster you!

At one point, he tried to get you with one really raunchy pun while on a date and you played along with a slick comeback instead...

Guess you can say it really revved up his engine.

King Candy

Unlike his past self, King Candy is more reserved, having to maintain his sugarcoated facade for over a decade at this point.

He still loves his puns (which are now candy themed), but now he knows how to really treat his partner well.

Be it chocolates of every variety, lollipop roses, jewelry, a trip around Sugar Rush in his racecar - you name it! He is a king, after all!

He will spoil you to death, whether you like it or not.

Not to mention the special treatment you would get as the King's "Thweetheart".

Royal permissions abound - having access to the best seats in any place, not just the Racing Arena, not having to pay for almost anything (although you still pay anyway because it feels illegal not to), having Sour Bill and other servants to cater to you...

Long story short, you got yourself a Sugar Daddy that also just so happens to be a Short King.

Was it to distract you from the fact that he's not actually King Candy? Most definitely, if you're unaware of this.

If for some reason the gifts aren't doing it for you, then His Royal Sweetness will do his damndest to make you swoon through flirting.

You have no idea how or where he gets it from, but that doesn't matter because he really has a way with words...

Sure, they can be flowery and cutesy and maybe even poetic, but there's a sort of tenderness in his voice that never fails to make your heart melt like a marshmallow in hot cocoa.

Especially when he whispers sweet nothings in your ear...

One day, you decide to try and flirt back; that is when you find out your royal beau can be easily flustered!

You took it far enough to make him turn as red as a Hot Tamale - especially when it comes to praises.

Ever since then, King Candy tries his hardest NOT to be flustered into oblivion as you tell him that he's such a good little racer~

How much he dominates all the others in every way possible... and for that he deserves a reward~

... he has yet to succeed.

You may not be royalty (...yet, maybe?) but you certainly felt like one.

King Candybug

Oh, you sweet little thing... what did you get yourself into?

Perhaps you lived and loved him since the peaceful days of Sugar Rush, or since before the RoadBlasters Incident, but regardless...

You are his.

There is horror in a monster's love; a horror in which you cannot resist - to be loved under smiling fangs and sharp claws, where you dance upon that tightrope between life and death

And once you fall, you fall knowing that you're going to be okay.

Despite what happened to him, he's still your lover.

You loved all of him, and even if the world was crumbling down and he was the cause, you somehow saw past all that.

Being the Cybug King's Chosen One is... not what you expected.

You thought he would be more like an animal - a creature driven purely by instincts.

But no. Instead, it's him. The Real Him. That adorably arrogant bastard in all of his glory.

And you reveled in it.

His favorite game to play with you is not Hide and Seek, as fun as it is. No, his favorite game is Flirting~

And his favorite method is lifting up your chin to meet his eyes.

For so long, you had always the advantage. No matter what, you always won.

And he hated it.

It drove him mad, constantly losing to the one race he couldn't beat! He vowed to one day finally conquer it and once he does...

Who knows what will happen next?

So this... this is vengeance.

#this was actually a really cool writing exercise!#i love writing romance and it just so happens that I'm currently in the process of planning out a fanfic...#sooooo ye #Happy Valentine's Day!#king candy #king candybug #turbo #wreck it ralph #wir turbo #wir king candy #wir king candybug #turbo x reader #king candy x reader #king candybug x reader #my writing #romantic headcanons #headcanons

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edwin-paynes-bowtie · 7 months ago

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My Case for Why Only Romantic Payneland Would Feel Truly Satisfying

Last night, I made a poll about whether people would be satisfied with QPR Payneland. I was curious where we stood on this as a fandom, and it's cool that it's about 50/50 between "either would be okay" and "I want them romantic."

Preface: I'm a monogamous biromantic asexual. If you were wondering. I have been in both a queerplatonic relationship (where I had a one-sided romantic crush on my QPP) and a few romantic relationships with both men and women.

Preface II: This post is not at all intended to be judgmental of any type of relationship. Poly people are awesome; aro/ace people in QPRs rock. This is specifically examining what is right for Charles and Edwin.

Preface III: I think that Edwin and Charles have definitely been in an unlabeled QPR since the beginning. They don't have the word for it, but it definitely is a QPR. They aren't romantically involved, but they make major decisions surrounding the other one and feel like they would wither up and die if they had to live in separate places.

This was great up until now, I think. A QPR is very valuable, very special, and very beautiful. It's meaningful and has served them wonderfully up until this point.

But it isn't sustainable for these specific characters.

The Need for Exclusivity in Both a QPR and a Romantic Relationship

I think that with no other external factors impacting my media needs, I would be okay with an exclusive QPR Payneland.

@tumblerislovetumblerislife astutely said:

I do not think that there is any world where they're suited for polyamory - this is honestly my biggest nope-out of fics and I deeply, deeply hate it for them.

This is because:

They already feel like a Pair Set to me that cannot be separated or infringed on by anyone else, and

In the end, it would never be fair to a romantic (or other platonic) partner because they would unplug anyone else's life support to charge the other's phone. No one else would ever be the priority over the other, and if they did, that would be OOC.

Even if they decided to date someone else now in the short-term, like Crystal or the Cat King, it's necessarily temporary. It's to Figure Things Out. There is an expiration date. And whether that's due to a romantic or a platonic bond between Edwin and Charles, their bond being stronger than any other is the reason for that expiration date.

So polyamory feels extremely disingenuous to their characters to me and is imo extremely OOC.

Authenticity to the Story

Edwin is currently, in the explicit canon, essentially Charles's QPP who has a one-sided crush on him. That is the explicit canon. It's not a fun place to be, no matter how much your QPP loves you - I have Been There.

Edwin is not unhappy or dissatisfied with the current situation, and he knows Charles loves him. But it still is kind of a sucky place to sit.

Luckily, the love does not actually feel one-sided! Charles reads as a character that has always been romantically in love with Edwin, probably long before Edwin fell romantically in love with Charles, but he neither has the self-awareness nor the words to describe it.

Charles touching his heart at the end of episode 8 makes it clear that he is beginning to have his Big Epiphany. I wish the show wasn't canceled because, uh, I want it.

This obvious two-sided romantic love makes a future QPR feel inauthentic to me. I think both characters would feel like it was the wrong shape for the relationship after they both had their epiphanies.

Other Media Considerations

I understand that a lot of people, it's important to have an explicitly-labeled QPR in a show. I do not disagree with this! I think we need WAY more QPRs in media that are explicitly labeled as such and treated as valid. I just don't think that it's right for Charles and Edwin.

I've explained why this is true from a character perspective; but let me also talk about how relationships like theirs are treated.

I'm personally sick of the "bond-beyond-bonds relationship that remains purely platonic." We saw it with Destiel onscreen because of the rancid queerbaiting in Supernatural; we saw it in Johnlock as a direct result of similar, albeit less magnified, queerbaiting.

This is, to me, the exact type of relationship that a QPR between Edwin and Charles would be.

It would be different. I know this. There is no world where DBDA is queerbaiting us; we have a gay MC and tons of queer side characters.

But to me, platonic Payneland being endgame would still feel like a betrayal because that endgame would feel like something adjacent to the endings of other shows that have queerbaited in the past. I feel like a huge appeal of DBDA is that it's beginning to right those wrongs and heal those wounds, and I firmly believe that's one intention of the show. It would feel unkind to the bulk of viewers for them not to end up together.

I think that the show ultimately was going to make them romantic endgame. It just didn't have the time to before getting the axe, which SUCKS.

So yeah. These are my personal thoughts. I hope I've articulated some of the things that a lot of you think.

#dbda #dead boy detectives #charles rowland #edwin payne #payneland

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iambilliejeanok · 1 year ago

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How they react to seeing reader cry.

Fandoms: Naruto( Akatsuki) || Jujustu Kaisen|| Record of Ragnarok

Featured: Buddha, Itachi, Orochimaru, Geto, Kisame

FLUFF OVERLOAD

🩷Buddha 🩷

He absolutely CANNOT afford to have you shedding tears and not solve whatever problem you have immediately.

Whenever he sees those tears running down your cheeks he lovingly lifts up your chin with his fingers, wiping them away with his thumb before pressing a few kisses to your lips. “What’s the matter?”, he asks, his eyebrows furrowing in concern. He really hates seeing you like this.

And he has many times before and will always be ready to fight the other gods for you. (Even though I genuinely don’t know what kind of mess you’re getting into to be stirring up gods and stuff) But since he is a god, which you don’t like to take advantage of, you try to keep things to yourself to not feel bad about the extra leg and a half you have in life. Since he loves you so much though, he will get to the bottom of this issue himself if it really comes down to it. If you’re struggling at work, with a project, family and friends or you’re not feeling well in general, he’s sure to immediately attend to those issues. But that’s only after he cuddles you to pieces.

He does show major signs of being clingy, so when your feeling upset he’s wrapped around you all day like a sweater, until he’s convinced that you’re well enough for him to leave you on your own and go sort out those issues. He’s like a personal hero. A very clingy one.

🩷Uchiha Itachi 🩷

He’s not as clingy as Buddha is, but when he does see you feeling upset enough to start crying, he will baby you to death. He turns into a koala and will literally wrap his arms around you and never let go. Not until he’s 100% certain you’re okay. And even then, he might spend some time being extra close to you just to make himself feel better.

He’s very susceptible to depression and when he sees you crying, it triggers a deep somberness inside of him that he can’t explain, and he starts overthinking, growing terribly paranoid about you getting hurt or being in any other kind of situation that would make you cry. He doesn’t tears, nor does he like the sound of crying, especially coming from you. So now you experience a season of clingy, overprotective, extra soft Itachi.

Even if you’re only upset in the moment and soon recover and get over whatever mad you cry, he still can’t help but linger around you for a week or two, taking many days off of work or finishing earlier than usual. He bathes with you, cooks each of your meals throughout the day, helps you get ready for bed and tucks you in at night. He will even treat you to a story while scratching your back before bed, and holds you tighter than usual, throughout the entire night.

You know he has some kind of a problem since his behavior is definitely not normal, but if it helps him in any way, you’ll always allow him to treat you like and you also try to reciprocate the treatment to help him snap out of it sooner rather than later.

🩷Orochimaru 🩷

He’s usually the reason as to why you cry to begin with, which at first, he pretends he doesn’t care, immediately turning around to walk away from you so he doesn’t have to watch you break down. But over time, he does take an interest in your feelings. He just feels guilty sometimes and doesn’t know how to approach you.

He knows you love to cuddle though, so he will try to use that during times like this and invite you to come and spend time with him while he works. He’ll rub your back and hold you close to him as he walks around his home and might even suggest going for walks around the large base hand in hand. He went as far as nurturing a garden with his own hands for you two to walk through whenever he upset you like this.

He doesn’t make you cry on purpose. It’s never his intention to begin with, but it happens and when it does, he kind of hates himself for a while. But he’ll never mention it and hides his guilt quite well. He loves it when you lay on his chest sometimes and he can rub your back, and slowly feel you begin to calm down.

Sometimes the poor man gets so frustrated over the sight of tears flooding your eyes, he’ll gently smoosh you into his chest and wrap his arms around you and just hold you, petting your head and rubbing your back while he tries to hush you. It’s only when it gets to this point that he’ll mumble and apology while he’s hugging you. He doesn’t mind standing with you like this until you finally calm down.

🩷Geto Suguru 🩷

He sees you crying and you’re surprised to see a warm smile plastered on his face. “Oh babe, it’s okay”, he chuckles, pulling you close against him to hug you. He’s so good at making the situation seem less dire than it actually is and prefers to distract you from your problems than talk about them.

He will address whatever cause those tears to begin with at later stage, but tries to focus on getting you passed your balling. Sometimes he’ll pick you up and rub your back while you wrap your limps around him and cry into his shoulder. He coos at you and baby talks you while he rocks you in his arms.

After endless kisses against your forehead while he cradles you in his arms, the moment he feels like your breakdown is over, he’ll tickle you. He tickles you until you’re breathless with laughter and have long forgotten to cry. You can only run away from him, and you try your best to wriggle out of his hold, and then he’s after you and the chase builds up adrenaline inside of you that totally distracts you from whatever made you cry.

You end up having to play fight him until there’s a winner, which he freely gives over to you. Once’s it’s been established that you’ve won, he’ll reward you with taking you out to your favorite place and doesn’t mind stopping to get some popsicles with you. He’s a total sucker for you when he tries to make you feel better and will even let you ride his dragon with him, the two of you flying over the nearby ocean, laying on your backs ontop of rainbow dragon, enjoying the wind brushing against your skin while you suck on your popsicle.

It’s during peaceful moments like this that he’ll finally ask you why you were so upset and now you can tell him without feeling too depressed about it.

🩷 Kisame 🩷

He’s not good with tears. He doesn’t know what to do whenever you cry and will quietly separate himself from you when he sees you getting emotional. It’s never with negative intentions, it’s just very awkward for him. What does he say? What should he do? He’s never really seen an example of how to approach the situation.

I mean at least he understands that you’re clearly having a hard time, so he will try and get as many chores out of the way as possible and will work extra hard to ensure that you don’t have to do a single thing around the house. He does grow very quiet though and won’t say much when he does find himself within your vicinity.

If you ask him to shower with you or do anything for you, he will of course. And he heavily relies on instruction during this time or else he’ll just excuse himself. If you’re having an episode and he notices you’re crying almost everyday, he becomes a bit scarce and when he’s away from you he’s constantly stressed out. He really doesn’t know what to do. He’ll humbly ask another member of the org for advice when it gets that bad, and will only come home at night to tidy up the entire house to make sure you’re chore-less the next day.

It’s only when you vent to him with tears in your eyes about why he’s avoiding you does the thought come to him like a lightbulb that he should probably spend more time holding you. He’s trying his best though I mean his traumatizing past is all he got sometimes. But he kind of likes it when you cling to him and your crying goes from making him nervous, to making him feel needed and protective.

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