#their most recent art of my boys literally makes me want to scream cry throw up etc etc etc

[multifandomhoodies]

the thing is. the thing IS i am never not thinking of my west virginian dincobb. i am always thinking about them. they are always on my mind

[wri0thesley]

many many anons under the cut bc i didn’t want anyone to feel like i was ignoring them and i wanted to respond to u all! warning for small text too, it was so long i wanted to make it look smaller fgbnjkgkjn

Anonymous asked: NAT... you can write WHATEVER you want! It's your blog, and I hope that rude anons can learn to respect that. I used to be on your blog just for jjba content too, so when you started getting into jjk I was indifferent but eventually you dragged me into jjk so hard!! I already like bnha, so seeing you write for it only made me happier! I hope that you continue to write whatever make YOU happy:) ❤and yes, longer fics certainly doesnt mean it's better, quality over quantity

ahh i’m happy that you are here for all three!! i always feel so accomplished when someone is like ‘your constant screaming made me think about jjk <3′. all three of the fandoms are fairly popular and i tag everything v carefully so i hope people who do use the filtering find that useful!!! 

Anonymous asked: Goodness gracious. People really be out there thinking they're entitled to dictating what kind of content you should be making

i think part of it might be that i do take requests so people feel like they have like . . . a certain right to certain kinds of my content? i take requests mostly bc they keep me motivated, i like making content for ppl who cant find what they want bc i’ve Been There, but maybe people think i am a pushover? idk i am just trying to have a good time!!!

Anonymous asked: Hi. I only started following you a few days ago but please ignore that rude anon. People are so fucking entitled towards writers it's insane. I recently had someone throw a fit for "spoiling" something in my fanfic, even though the fic was about a manga-exclusive character, so what did they expect?? Overall I've really enjoyed your writing so random assholes coming to guilt you is just a shitty thing that happens. Keep going with what you wanna do.

ah gosh anon i’m sorry about that :(. i’m always super careful tagging spoilers and stuff but like, if someone clicks on a fic about say, naoya or the steel ball run boys and is mad that i spoil something they havent found out yet . . . yeah thats on them fgbnkjgfkjn

Anonymous asked: That...that anon had the nerve to say "we". The fuck?! No no no anon, YOU'RE the only one talking and you're just talking for yourself, don't you dare try and lump us other anons/followers up with you to make yourself look like you're right. We love you nat and we appreciate you. It's your blog, you're allowed to write about whoever and whatever. This brain dead anon just needs to either go read someone else if they're that salty or write their own stuff if they're that impatient.

gosh i WISH some of my mad anons would just write their own stuff honestly. idk if this anon thought they were talking for everybody but i guess they expected anons to agree with them and not be mad at them. i appreciate u anon ;_;

Anonymous asked: Just want to say that ily and you’re one of the best jojo fanfic writers in my opinion 💗 I don’t think you’re half assing jojo fics and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you being multi fandom. A lot of jojo blogs have started posting about jjk so it’s not as if you’re the only one. I’m not sure why you get hate like this but I think it’s just because you’re one of the popular writers and that makes people bitter for whatever reason. Keep being you and posting about the things that make you happy 💕

honestly after so long writing for jojo - i’ve written well over 200 jojo reader insert fics - sometimes it feels like i’m retreading stuff, and that’s when i take a break bc i dont wanna half-ass stuff!!! i love all of my fellow jojo friends who are posting about jjk too, i appreciate them <3. 

Anonymous asked: Hey my dude, ur writing has really grown since the jojo days and its better and awesome seeing u become happier to branch off and write in different fandoms 🤌🤌 those stupid anons are just boring farts that couldnt be bothered making their own content 😤😤 is it possible to block them to ease ur mind?

hello anon!! i run a statcounter for IPs but it doesnt always work for ppl who access through the tumblr app, i don’t think; a lot of the anon hate i get i just use the ‘block’ option, but last night got to me because i’ve been getting that kind of writer a lot which is . . . a bad look for the jojo fandom who are, as a whole from the ones i’ve interacted with, lovely!!! <3

Anonymous asked: People often forget, the person behind art or writing, is just another regular fan. You deserve to be happy with what you create and we should be thankful you share your talent with us. You also have right to change your main interests, and it's very normal thing. Jojo is one of the MANY things that you write for and all you get from that is a like or share. Its not your job. It's your fun thing to do, in spare time. You haven't betrayed anybody. That person was just rude, selfish and bored.

i am just a person doing my best!!! anime fanfic is one of many interests i have and i already devote a lot of time to it honestly, i love when people tell me they’ve enjoyed something i made bc it makes it feel worthwhile but equally it gets to me a lot when people are rude because i am usually trying my hardest. 

Anonymous asked: Bro that jjba anon... the entitlement🤮 Fam, you write whatever you want to write😤 -Saturday

dfnjbkjnkgf i find most fic readers are NOT entitled at all and are just grateful but when they are . . . oof. 

Anonymous asked: It's funny how people throw "we got you popular" and they think you start apologize and cry. Your writing and passion made you gain few numbers on a follow counter, nothing more. I think I'm too old for stuff like this, we are nothing more, but +1 on a number scale. You ow us nothing, we ow you nothing. Popular... Funny word. You just write for fun of it, fake scenarios about someone's manga characters. It's not that deep. Have fun and don't listen to people like this. I knew it's not that easy, but they are really not that important as they think they are.

extremely fun fact for people who think ‘popularity’ is important to me: i would 100% rather have 10 people who regularly comment, reblog my fics with tags and interact with me than 100 people who read my fic and either leave a like or simply move on. i think this is true for the VAST MAJORITY of writers tbh. i’m glad that people think i am a ‘popular’ blog (i am not in the grand scheme of things, one of my ex-best friends used to run a kpop reader insert blog with like 30,000 followers) bc it gives me an ego boost lmao, but i really just want people to read and enjoy the stuff i write!!! 

Anonymous asked: I followed you a while ago for jojo and when my friends started getting into jjk i was like...eh sounds like work...but now that I see you writing for it I feel really motivated to get into it!!! I really enjoy your writing and I want to be able to read the new stuff too!

ah anon i really hope you like it!!! it’s only one season rn if u wanna watch the anime and there isn’t too much of the manga to catch up on either but it is a lot of fun and it’s nice to be in a fandom that’s like, excited about a new chapter and new plot developments every week!

Anonymous asked: Pls dont reply if u dont want to! <3 I'm not sure if this will be of any help to you or not but this is the kind of thing that often helps me and is the only way I know to try comfort others so I wanted to give it a go~

Now im not gonna say 'dont feel bad pls' bc I know that's not really useful but what I do think is useful is just discussing why that anon and many others feel the need to respond that way. As someone who follows a lot of writing blogs myself and have done for a long time, i've seen my handful of favourite writers come and go for different reasons, lose motivation for a while, gain motivation for a while, go from multi to single fandom, or single fandom to multi. Often times as a reader it can be upsetting when things change but it's also important as a reader to understand that some things aren't in anyone's control, I can't control what my favourite writers become a fan of or lose interest of, I can't control things in their personal lives that may motivate or demotivate them to write, but what I can do is support them as long as they're active, and if they move on to do things i'm no longer interested in or i'm the one that changed interests, rather than being upset that they're evolving to do other things or that they're not evolving with me, I think it's important that I still feel thankful for the works that I enjoyed while we were still on the same page and this is how I personally deal with those negative feelings. I think the anons that lash out at you probably just dont know what to do with themselves, maybe they got attached to your works while you were still only a jjba blog and now that you're evolving they're upset, while I understand how they feel, they're going the completely wrong way about it. I've learned to take these things and turn them into something positive for myself or at least something bittersweet that I can move on from but the anons that lash out at you for whatever reason probably haven't learned this yet. Maybe it's because i've moved on and changed interests a lot myself that I know how these things go for both writers and readers but those anons maybe haven't experienced this as much so they dont know what to do with themselves other than complain that you've changed and throw insults at you in an attempt to get you to revert back. None of this is because of the quality of your writing like they want you to believe, it's literally just because you've evolved and while some of your old followers might not like the new content for no reason other than it not being their cup of tea, it's definitely not regressed at all. You are pumping out a lot of content right now but every single thing i've read has just been better than the last. Things that really stand out to me is how well you get characterisation down to a T and all of your dialogue is just on point and from the pov of a reader I think those things seem the hardest to get right so I am such a huge fan of your stuff at the moment and I can tell you're really putting so much thought and care into each and every fic no matter how fast you're producing it, I think the fact that you're also proud of what you're writing at the moment really shines through as well and I just adore the passion that radiates from every completed request as well as in the responses for the subsequent thirsts resulting from these works that appear in your ask box later (I know i've sent quite a few by now~)

Just to be clear i'm not defending those anons in any way, while I can understand what they might be feeling/why they're reacting in the way they are I still believe it's just so immature to be hateful online point blank. Even during a time where I still got upset with writers if they started doing something else I still never targeted that negativity directly to the writer and sending rude or hateful comments whether on anon or not never something i'd stooped low enough to do even when I still had an immature way of thinking, however, I hope that it might make it a little easier to brush them off if we try and understand what they're really upset about, and that they're just putting the blame for their negative feelings onto the wrong thing rather than coming to terms with change themselves.

hello anon!! i appreciate the long message. i do feel bad for people who have no interest in what i’m currently producing and i get that they feel upset about it; i’ve watched a lot of fellow jojo writers move on completely or just stop posting, honestly. this kind of thing is why i was so intense about asking people if it would be better if i made a separate blog but the resounding answer seemed to be ‘i’m just vibing with whatever happens and i’ll block tags as needed’. 

i often return to works by my favourite reader-insert writers who no longer write for the fandoms i like (and i read stuff bc it sounds interesting or i trust the person who writes it), but change can be difficult and i guess at this point i’ve - whether u like me or not lmao - been a fixture in jojo reader-insert tumblr for a While so it’s probably kind of jarring. 

anyway i really appreciate you and the nice words! <3 

Anonymous asked: hi nat! I just wanted to pop in and say that regardless of what fandom you write for, the love and care you pour into your writing and into interacting with followers who care about your work as well is really obvious. you're doing this for FREE and people should appreciate what you've given us so far, since ultimately this blog should be for you, whatever that means to you at any point in time. it's ok to jump fandoms! the important thing is that you feel good about what you're producing and that it makes you happy. everyone else is just a bonus - but, seeing you on my dash certainly makes me happy : ) I hope you feel better soon!

thank you anon! i’m feeling much better and happier today. birthdays are very difficult for me (i did not think i’d be alive at eighteen, much less 25!) so this event is definitely kind of a way for me to concentrate on something else, and i’m a little bit extra sensitive atm. i appreciate you so much, thank you for the kind words!!! <3

Anonymous asked: Hello! I just wanted to say, write what YOU want and make YOUR writings as long as you'd like. 💖 To the anon who is like "We mAdE yOu FaMoUs dOnt HalF asS iT" stfu, let people do what they wanna do. If you think they half do it, write something better and longer you asshat.

this is an open invitiation to that anon to send me a link to their writing blog and i’ll hype them up i promise <3 

Anonymous asked: nat i'm so so sorry about that ask please know that your older followers don't share the same opinion :( sometimes people forget about the living, breathing person behind the screen smh. you are not a machine. you absolutely should not restrict yourself to posting about one fandom forever. yes, we're first pulled in by your amazing content, but we stay for your wonderful personality and work ethic. please just keep being you, taking up projects you feel comfy with! <333 bless u

ahh thank u anon! unfortunately i actually am a writing robot, i’m sorry u had to find out this way. my jojo chip has been removed, please send it back so i can continue to not half-ass my jojo work. fgnjkbgjkfn thank you so much angel!!! i appreciate you ;_;.

Anonymous asked: i don’t think it’s fair for other people to say shit about what you choose to write about because on tumblr and other writing platforms, writers are constantly developing how they write and the fandoms that they write for. it’s not fair for someone to criticize that “you don’t care about jjba blah blah blah” because you can enjoy new shows/manga. and like you said you’ve grown so much!! proud of you nat and im glad that ive been able to read your works (sincerely other nat)

i am STILL waiting for you to come and fight me other nat fgnjkbnf. it’s nice to be enjoying different things! i am constantly learning new things and reading new works and making new friends and improving and i think that’s important. i do care about jjba - a lot! but i can care about other things too! <3 

Anonymous asked: I may not be one of your oldest followers, but i've been here for almost 3 years. Yes, i started following u for ur jojo content, but let me tell u, ur newfound motivation and enthusiam for other fandoms was honestly contagiuos for me. And i say this as a person who finds very difficult to move from one interest to another. Jojo is great, but so are other fandoms. Please don't let some faceless scum rob u that motivation. This is ur blog and u r always free to write whatever u want.

honestly, i have been there! i am autistic and i have special interests and watching other people move on to stuff i’m not vibing with has made me sad in the past, but i want people to be happy more than anything and sometimes that means new things and change! <3 

Anonymous asked: Hi Nat! I saw that rude anon message & I just wanted to pop in & say that they're wrong. You're not betraying anyone & you should write whatever it is you want to write. I followed you for jojo & I'm not familiar with the other fandoms that you write for, but personally it makes me SO happy to see you enjoying new things! It's always good to find joy wherever you can, so keep writing what you're interested in. There a lot of ppl who want to see you happy and healthy <3

honestly the idea of it being a GRAND BETRAYAL is so funny, i am just writing anime fanfic here and thriving!!! tysm anon! <3

Anonymous asked: Those anons can piss off! They have no right to judge how long or how short your writing is. If they want longer content write it their damn selves. I think your writing has improved wonderfully and I originally followed for Jojo and I'm enjoying all the content period. I don't even watch jujutsu ( not my cup of tea personally) but I love seeing the creativity and the interactions. You write what makes you happy Nat and that's on that! You don't owe anybody anything! I know how hard writing is and when your consuming new content it's hard to make content for something else. That doesn't mean you don't like it any more your just doing something different for a while. Love you and your content and I'm enjoying the love your putting into your content whether long or short. ♥♥💕 Sending love your way!

honestly my idea of ‘short content’ is still over 1k words, i’m not good at reeling myself in! i guess it’s bc they see like, 1.5k jojo fic versus 5k jjk fic but it’s not that i didn’t enjoy the first fic, just that the point and the story came a lot quicker and so did the natural end! thank you anon, i appreciate you ;_; 

Anonymous asked: Hello! Just wanted to let your know that I think your writing is awesome, and that you should write for whoever and for whatever you want to! You dont have to stay loyal to one fandom or anything, and your followers shouldn't expect that from you! It's not like they are paying you to write, you are doing this for free, and because you enjoy it and it makes you happy! If they dont like your stuff, they dont have to follow you, they can go to other blogs that cater to their taste, and they definitely don't need to be sending you such hurtful comments, and they dont get to make you feel sad about your writing! Just because they followed you during your earlier stages of writing, doesn't mean you owe them some type of loyalty or compensation! You can write literally whatever you want as long as it makes you happy! That's what your hobby and your blog are for! I hope you know that alot of your followers love your work and think that you are an amazing writer and are down to support the work that makes you happiest! 💖💖

ahh thank you so much anon!!! i am always so bowled over by how many people are nice to me when something like this happens, i am sending you my love <3

Anonymous asked: don’t listen to them!! we love you as a writer no matter what you write, because you’re a good person and a talented writer!! you shouldn’t have to change what you write to please a bitter person, and if they only want jjba, they can go to another blog instead of bringing you down. you’re doing amazing and they should be thankful you grace us with your talents!!

to be totally honest, if i was half-assing or not vibing with content i was making i just. wouldn’t post it. like you’d be able to TELL when i was half-assing stuff just to get words out (source: i have re-read my own nanowrimo works). there are lots of great jjba blogs who could do with more followers n interaction!!! i hope they do find them and i hope they’re nice to them :(. 

Anonymous asked: Please don’t pay attention to that anon. People only have that confidence when they have anon turned on. Them looking through your blog despite feeling that way is peak fan behavior and speaks to how addicting your writing is. Naturally, you can’t please everyone and there will be people who are irrational and feel entitled to tell you what to do or what to write no matter what. Trust me when I say they’re a small minority and are more likely probably passing viewers rather than regulars. I check your blog about three or more times a day because I love reading not just your fics but also your takes, banter with other anons, or even random updates. Brainrot posts? LOVE TO SEE IT!!! Desk update? AMAZING!!! With that being said, don’t feel pressured to continue pushing out content for others. Write what makes you happy! You’ve been writing for JJBA for 4 years and it’s completely normal + healthy to get into new media. I’m not sure if it would mean much, but your love for JJK has gotten me excited to start it too!!

anon i really hope you enjoy it!!! sometimes these anons remember stuff i’ve posted and said better than i do tbh, i am living in their heads rent free i guess! 

Anonymous asked: I've been following you for a couple of years and honestly it would always be a joy to see when you posted. Your writing has improved and I'm very happy you're enjoying yourself ! I know it hurts hearing and seeing stuff like that but I'm happy you're here. I'm honestly blessed everytime you post. Your writing is phenomenal. I love reading it even if its characters that I dont care for. You capture their essences so well and weave an amazing tale within the prompts and whatnot. You're amazing nat!

wehh thank you so much!!! re: the improvement, i really don’t feel like it has and then i re-read something i wrote when i first started and i’m like oh my god maybe it has. did i really write about jotaro acting like that. 

Anonymous asked: Hi Nat. I recently became a follower of yours and I'm really saddened to see you get hate. You seem like a genuinely sweet person with amazing talent! I'm a writer myself and, unfortunately, get the same kind of comments. And when you get those comments, it doesn't leave you feeling motivated. People need to understand that people can and will, at times, grow out of fandoms. (1 Not just that but you're doing all of this for free. Again, I'm sorry you got such a comment. But please know that I'm proud of how far you've come. I'm proud that you're living a life that makes you happy. And no matter what fandom you may find yourself in next, I will always enjoy your writing. Take care of yourself. (2 end

HELLO NEW FOLLOWER I LOVE YOU (i get a lot more a day now than i used to and i feel guilty about not being able to look through so many blogs but i do try and follow back other writers for my fandoms!! ;_;). i’m sorry you get the same kind of comments! i’m always just happy to see people i like enjoying new things, even if i have no interest in it (hello to all of my mutuals who write for hunter x hunter and haikyuu, not interested but i’m sure you’re having a great time and i support you!!!). 

Anonymous asked: I'm sure you're getting a barrage of supportive messages now (at least I hope so) but I figured I'd add my voice, because I'm a longtime follower. Your writing is, and always has been, wonderful. I've been so happy to see you and Haz get to a place that works for you both. Idk if it's obvious for everyone, but you seem like you're emotionally in a pretty good place most of the time these days, and it makes me really happy to see that. I followed years ago for JJBA content, but I stayed because regardless of what content you put out, I find your wit delightful. And I'll stick around even if you move fandoms entirely, because whatever content or editorializing you produce is going to be worth reading, regardless of what it's for.

ahh, anon!! thank you for sticking around so long, sorry if you’re old enough to have been around the vore and jorts and spider rohan fiascos! <3 i am definitely a lot more stable than i have been and - barring the Pandemic Related Mental Health Issues - happier! i’m glad that it’s noticeable! <3

Anonymous asked: It actually makes me mad how entitled some people are. Nat, you're not a content creating machine and those who expect you to be are not worth wasting a thought on. Your love for something is not measured in word counts and for you to write every day without getting burned out in the slightest you really must have a burning passion and huge dedication to your craft. If others decide to send hate then allow me to send admiration because I can feel your love and hard work in each post you make!

i try and write every day bc it’s super good for my little ocd/autistic brain to have routines and distract itself, so i’m glad other people can enjoy them because that makes me motivated to carry on! like, i write for myself mostly bc the content i want i sometimes get find, but filling requests and writing for other people also leaves me with happy warm fuzzies too! i appreciate you!! <3 

Anonymous asked: If people only care about your writing for the jojo porn that’s on THEM, not you. Your writing was amazing when I followed about a year ago, and it’s only gotten better and will continue to get better! I think it really comes through when you enjoy what you’re writing and it adds a whole other layer of worth to it, because not only are you making free content but you LIKE that content and we can all gush about it together!!! More than just fans, I think you’ve created a community here and we don’t just stick around to read smut, I promise you that. -Reronon

i do miss having a discord community bc it was nice to talk to everyone in real time but it was hard work, i am glad that people feel like they can just come into my askbox and gush! i’m not very friendly in real life and people tend to think i am cold and stuck up so i work very hard to try and seem friendly and approachable online, which is much easier for me because i get to think and re-draft before i type! <3 

Anonymous asked: Hi Nat! I’m sure you’re getting a lot of messages like this right now but I just wanted to say for what it’s worth that, as a person who originally followed you for jjba content and hasn’t watched/read any of the other series you’re currently writing for, I’m honestly still along for the ride. This is your blog and you’re allowed to do what you want with it and put out what content you feel like writing. Sometimes??? People acquire new interests??????? Shocking! I know absolutely nothing about jjk or bnha but out of curiosity still read some of your posts about them and even though I might not Get It, I still enjoy them because I think you’re a very talented writer! Honestly, as long as you’re still writing, I’m still down to clown, and whenever you take breaks (which are important!) I’ll still be waiting for your return or supporting and respecting your decision to stay away longer. Don’t let the entitled assholes get you down. Utilize YOUR blog and YOUR space however YOU choose. Your talent and kindness speak for themselves. Love you!!! ❤️❤️❤️

anon i care about you and i am so appreciative of you and everyone for sending me such nice messages! i am running out of ways to say it but it’s true, it really does mean a lot to me ;_; <3

[f33itan]

5, 16, 22, 28, 58, 59 lmaooo is it too many? :3

Oh no, it isn’t many at all!! Glad you requested pastel :] If anything I’m just warning you that this might be long

5: is there anyone who can always make you smile?

Unless I’m in a super SUPER utterly terrible mood, it would be my Mother. Yes I love my Dad to bits as well, but my mom and I have that extra special mother-daughter connection yk? Usually when I’m upset or weary about something my mom can take one good look at me and read me like a book.

Nat: Literally doing NOTHING

Mum: Nati.

Nat: Yes?

Mum: What’s wrong?

Nat: Nothing, why?

-Silence and avoiding eye contact-

Nat: Okay so maybe there might be a teeny tiinnyy thing-

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?                  

I can’t even TELL YOU HOW MANY TIMES THIS HAS HAPPENED OMG BAHAHAH but for now I’ll just give a recent time. Okay so me, my cousin and a daughter of one of my dad’s friends (she’s my age dw we good) were in my room chilling on this massive beanbag going from ranting about daddy levi to getting in our feels, and it got to the point that around 3 am my cousin left to the living room to play beat saber ad I was left with the girl. Not too long before this i was in my feels about how ive been rejected on valentine’s day, called ugly by my crush (which hurted, do not attempt) and called clingy for comforting a friend etc and me and the girl plopped on the bean bag in a position that, uh, how do i say this... hmm. . . ILL JUST DRAW AND ADD A PHOTO SO IT MAKES SENSE LMAO

((PLEASE WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS I DREW IT ON MY LAPTOP WITH MY FINGERS AND CLICK PAD THINGY IM SO SORRY IT SUCKS, AND SHES PAN SAME AS ME SO I WAS IN PANICC at the disco also different fonts so you can tell all of the different thoughts apart))

But anyways yeah we were in that position, and my thoughts were...

-Pan panic- -holy shit im in contact with a person like this thats not my family- -should i turn to cuddle her? no she might think its weird- -wtf nat you literally just met her earlier today- -i know but shes super nice and we relate on a lot of thingsss- -NO- -What would feitan say to this?- -Know your limits brain.-

22. description of crush. 

R we talking 2D or 3D because uh... lets just do both!

3D: literally every alt, goth, emo peep on tiktok, they all look so pretty and for what??

2D: A man way older than me.. Hair up to about his lower neck.. On the short side.. Beautiful shiny purple eyes... Hair that I thought was black but when sampling the color from official art from hxh creators and shit found out its a really dark green.. Murderous, Sadist, and most likely Masochist tendencies.. Hot well toned body.. Chinese.. *Insert Ayesha Erotica’s Emo Boy song*

28. i’ll love you if…

you buy me dark chocolate

If you are able to deal with my constant switch of “I wanna be clingy, cuddly, affectionate and sweet” to “Lets scream lyrics to a song, eat random food and not come in contact with each other unless its play fighting” and a bonus, “Leave me the fuck alone and let me play my video games by myself”

If you tolerate my attitude, and the fact that all I can really cook without getting scared for the most part is scrambles eggs, toast and bagels, re heating a meal (does that even count), and brownies.

Accepting me for who I am, and not just the silly playful cover I share with most people, you can be a shoulder to cry on for me as in almost all situations I’m the shoulder for others, being able to comfort each other and talk about weird and embarrassing things we’ve done in the passed and not get a nasty looked or shamed for it, keeping me from buying really pointless things, dealing with the fact that Im a massive chicken when it comes to roller coasters, yet put me on literally ANY OTHER DANGEROUS THING and I’ll be as happy as a child in a candy store. Swimming with sharks? Fuck yeah! Ziplining over alligators? YES! (Ive done that actually when I was 7 or 8) Go swimming through dark and light ruins of underground passage ways in Cancun? YESSIR!! (Which Ive done as well) Roller coasters? Get the hell away from me.

And simply deal with me, myself. and I

58. description of my best friend

I have multiple so I picked one teehee

Tall, skinny as a stick, for whatever reason can carry me with simply two arms extended out, light brown hair that she always wears in a ponytail (but wore it down for me on my birthday), started out introverted but with me hugging her at school everyday became a big time ambivert, usually the one who keeps me from 1. lashing out at classmates and 2. getting into trouble most of the time, can joke around a lot but speaks rather quietly so sometimes she has to repeat herself for my deaf ass lmao, if there’s inclement weather at school, during our break in class either she or I make a bee line for each other’s desk and start cackling immediately afterwards, random times in class one of us will throw a cringy smirk at the other and it becomes this stupid war of who get the last smirk in, whenever were walking around campus one of us will be holding onto the other’s sleeve loosely, (most of the time its me, but she’s done it too), We have had this thing for years now that when she has her hands on her hips I tried to stick my head through that opening, and for years on end I couldn’t do it, and when I did it was the best day ever

59. why i joined tumblr

Simple reason really, Feitan. Whenever I looked up “feitan fluff” before I went to bed to end the day nicely, it would always bring me to some tumblr page, so I decided to make an account and, well, here we are. ⛹️‍♀️

[alifeincoffeespoons]

a wolfstar good omens au

because i LOVE the art of @maria-tries​ and have had this headcanon living rent-free in my head ever since i saw this

i. 

Sirius is cool. When he walks, it’s with a swagger. He knows the right way to smirk to make strangers blush. He knows how to make his hair fall perfectly around his shoulders and catch the eye of every passerby. He knows how to wear his leather jacket so it fits him perfectly, no matter what he has on underneath. It comes with being a demon, after all.

(This is not entirely true. Most demons don’t pay attention to the way their hair falls or the perfect way to smirk. Sirius is the only demon who actually cares to learn these things. It’s true that every demon is capable of these things; most just don’t particularly want to, especially when they could be torturing idiotic humans instead.)

This makes him particularly good at temptation. Other things Sirius is good at include inventing devices and structures to lead humans onto the path to damnation (his more recent ones include Twitter and inauthentic poke bowl chains), raising tropical birds, and caring for his motorbike, a 1940 Harley-Davidson. 

Things Sirius is apparently not good at include caring for children, given that he’s lost the fucking Antichrist. 

“What do you mean you’ve lost him?” Remus hisses, and wow, this is the angriest Remus has ever looked, which isn’t very angry at all, to be honest, given that angels aren’t actually capable of being angry. To an outsider, he just looks a bit befuddled. 

“You lost him too!”

“Yes, but you were the one who brought him to that hospital.”

“Satanic convent.”

“Is this really the time to be precise?”

“I mean, a lack of precision was what got us here,” and it looks like angels actually are capable of being angry, since Remus’s current blank stare is absolutely terrifying.

“Are you sure?” Remus paces around the grounds of Malfoy Manor, where the birthday-boy-who-is-apparently-not-the-Antichrist is laughing at the hired magician, a pompous narcissist named Gilderoy Lockhart, who’s just failed to pull a bunny rabbit out of his top hat. Sirius makes a mental note to use Lockhart to tempt more people into rage sometime; if this is how horribly arrogant he is at a child’s birthday party, he can’t wait to see the damage he could do on a date. 

(Over the course of Gilderoy Lockhart’s short existence, he’s managed to seal the damnation of thirty individuals already. He would be a very good demon. Gilderoy Lockhart himself, of course, was hell-bound before he even reached his second year of university, by the force of his unfortunate habit of stealing the research of his fellow students. This, coincidentally, was also how he managed to get expelled from university.)

Multiple people would probably end up with black eyes at the end.

“Well, there’s no hellhound—”

“Don’t say that in front of the humans!”

“Oh, come off it, no one’s listening, everyone’s either getting drunk or throwing food at the magician—”

“Still!”

“There’s no dog here, and Bellatrix was just kind enough to inform me that the hellhound has arrived safely at the Antichrist’s home, so I’m pretty damn sure this is the wrong kid!”

“But how could we have lost him?” Remus looks like he’s going to either scream or cry, and neither is particularly appropriate for this occasion, even if Draco Malfoy’s birthday party is shaping up to be an unmitigated disaster even without the Antichrist Problem, given that the guests have begun throwing around chunks of the birthday cake topped with edible gold. 

(Which would have been a bad idea even if Lockhart wasn’t a hopeless magician, given that no eleven-year-old’s palette is nuanced enough to appreciate the delicacies of edible gold. Alternatively, edible gold is never a good idea, as it is simply capitalism at its worst. The second is more likely.)

“I don’t know, but we have, so we better fucking do something about it,” Sirius says. 

ii.

Doing something about it apparently means getting the hell out of Draco Malfoy’s disastrous eleventh birthday party and hunkering down in Remus’s bookstore to do research. Research means, in this case, Remus muttering furiously as he flips through dozens of prophecy books in hopes of finding something useful and Sirius annoying Remus as Remus mutters furiously. It’s very fun, annoying Remus. His angel isn’t very easily flustered, to be honest, which makes the pay-off even more worth it when he becomes flustered, in Sirius’s opinion. 

(Remus’s cheeks go all red and his freckles become even more prominent. If Sirius was the type of demon who went around calling things adorable, he would call Remus adorable. As Sirius is not that kind of demon, thank you very much, he thinks of Remus, secretly, as delectable. Honestly, the two are fairly interchangeable.)

Over the course of his 6,000-year-plus tenure on Earth, he’s also discovered that there are many things that annoy Remus. These include, and are not limited to:

Flipping through one of his books loudly and sighing whenever possible, making sure to say “boring” in an audible tone;

Eating Remus’s chocolate and then leaving the wrappers everywhere for him to find;

Calling Remus “Moony-Moons” in a sickeningly sweet tone (a nickname acquired after an unfortunate incident wherein some superstitious residents of Edinburgh mistook the angel for a werewolf in the 16th century);

Taking the motorbike around the block near Remus’s bookshop, making sure to rev the engine very loudly every lap; 

Humming “God Save The Queen” off-key, just loudly enough for Remus to hear. It’s doubly annoying, because he tips his chair back to creak on every off-beat.

Right now, he’s in the process of repeating the fifth option for the third time when Remus slams the book shut. For a moment, he thinks Remus is going to whisper-yell at him. 

(Hot.)

Or maybe he’s going to kiss him. 

(Even hotter.)

Instead, Remus simply stands up. 

“Right. I think we need to find a book.”

“Remus, you have almost every book written in the past five centuries and then some in this bookshop.” This is helped by the fact that Remus keeps very odd hours, always opening late in the afternoon and closing early in the morning. This isn’t even to mention the week he takes off every month, without fail, which has helped spread the rumor, again, that Remus is a werewolf. Sirius has not mentioned the existence of this rumor to Remus, because he finds it hilarious. If Remus needed to actually make money, he would be exceptionally poor, given that the last time he sold a book was three weeks ago, and it was a two pound guide book of Paris. 

Remus gives him a look. “Unfortunately, I don’t, actually, though that would be very nice. I’m missing Cassandra Trelawney’s Book of Strange and Mystical Prophecies.”

“Remus, all this prophecy bunk is rubbish. It’s just humans trying to scam dumber humans out of their money.” Sirius would know. He’s very good at creating ways for humans to scam dumber humans out of their money. He invented Juicero, after all. 

“It’s not, actually,” Remus says. “Granted, a lot of the prophetic books are, especially those from the 19th century, but Cassandra Trelawney’s is exceptionally accurate.”

“Aren’t you the one always going on about ineffability? How can any books be written if everything is ineffable anyway?”

Remus sighs. His angel is exceptionally good at sighing. Secretly, Sirius likes to think that they’re a sign of affection. 

(Actually, they are. Remus has a specific sigh for Sirius, which can best be translated as “you’re quite annoying, in all honesty, but for some reason, I’ve grown very attached to you and don’t know how I could bear to live without you at this point.”)

“The Plan may be ineffable, but Cassandra Trelawney was a true seer. This is just a shot in the dark, honestly, but if we could get our hands on it, it might help us find out who the Antichrist actually is.”

“And then what do we do?” Sirius asks. “What, we find this Antichrist, who’s probably been influenced by Downstairs already, if he has the hellhound, and what? We talk to him about how this world is actually very nice, so please don’t end it, please? You really think that’s going to work? This is the literal spawn of Satan, Remus. It’s not just another idiotic eleven-year-old. And what, do you think that prophecy book is just going to hold all the answers? That it’ll give a perfect description of the Antichrist and his exact address, and we’ll just find him?” 

“Well, what else can we do?” And there’s that Remus flush. Delectable, indeed.

“Run away with me,” Sirius decides suddenly. Remus gives him an incredulous look.

“To where?” he scoffs. “Sirius, if we can’t find the Antichrist, all of this will be gone.”

And that hurts, it does, because Sirius loves Earth, loves everything about it. He loves the solidity of the ground under his motorbike, loves the wine (he has taste, sue him), loves London especially, all the cafes where he can watch Remus sip tea and fawn over chocolate pastries. But if they find the Antichrist, and everything goes south anyway, because that’s what will probably happen, in any case—

“What if we find him and it’s gone anyway? Remus, if we fuck this up—and given how solidly we managed to fuck up taking care of the right Antichrist—one of us will probably be dead in the next month.” I can’t lose you, he doesn’t say, because he doesn’t know what he would do if Remus doesn’t feel the same way. “Remus, we can go—we can go to fuck, I don’t know, Alpha Centauri. Or anywhere else. You read all those books about exploring the galaxy, well, we could do that.”

Because Remus is far more principled than Sirius, for a moment, he seems to be gazing into space, and then he just sighs. 

(In that moment, Remus thought about running away with Sirius to some distant galaxy, where they could be something besides an angel and a demon, something unnameable and perfect in that unnameability, and it was all well and good for that moment, but then he thought about all the families that would be torn apart, all of the people who hadn’t done anything wrong at all, really, and would be condemned for simply happening to exist at the wrong time, and he knew he couldn’t.)

“We can’t. We just—we need to find him, and we can go from there. Look, has anything terrible happened yet?”

“It could be,” Sirius says sullenly. “And something terrible is always happening.”

“More terrible than usual, I mean. Earthquakes across the world, volcanic eruptions, Martians destroying London—and don’t give me that look, we’ll know if that happens.”

“Not yet,” Sirius has to admit. 

“Well, there you have it. We can save him.”

“Oh, so because he’s not currently destroying the world, he’s suddenly not the Antichrist anymore?”

“I never said that,” Remus replies mildly. “I’m saying that he’s a child, even if he’s the Antichrist, and he can’t be expected to be a soldier in a war he doesn’t even know he signed up for.”

“You and your fucking logic. Where are we even going to find this book of horrible prophecies?”

“I may have an idea,” Remus says.

(This idea, it must be said, is less of a fully-formed idea and more of an inkling. In short, it is not a very good idea.)

will i ever write more of this? who knows. maybe? i just Love the idea of sirius as crowley and remus as aziraphale so very much. 

(harry’s the antichrist, of course. but a good one!)

[jlf23tumble]

Top 10 Niche Interests

Fixations? Obsessions? This is incredibly hard because I have wayyyy too many niche interests, so instead of stressing about it, I tried to channel the 10 things that immediately speak to me and maybe aren't so obvious from what I post here, like how much I'm obsessed with wigs, doll furniture, incredibly specific blogs, all forms of clothing with pockets, swimming pools, whimsical bus stops, over-the-top bathrooms, etc. etc Instead, I opted for some specifics that feel a little more evergreen and long tailed, like, so LIFE-long tailed that it's tough to nail down when or how they became part of the national psyche. I thank @alienfuckeronmain​ for the initial tag, and I'm tagging her AGAIN for round two because I know she has a billion additional niche things, and she'll post them, and I'll scream because it'll trigger five other things I neglected to post here, and I'll probably post my own round two, arggggh, insert aggressive sighing. Anyway, I tag ANYONE who wants to do it, just tag me so I can see! 

1. Indoor Trees

I have no idea why this concept PULLS so hard because houseplants are kind of meh to me, but you want to plant an entire-ass TREE indoors, in the place where you live? Me, too, and I'd add a conversation pit plus a combo gold/red bathroom, among other things, and, bam, we're in my imaginary dream home, which I have literally, constantly ALWAYS mentally constructed from the time I was about six or so. (If you're curious, it has multiple themed rooms, and the closest I've seen to it recently is the outstanding Dita von Teese AD feature, but Amy Sedaris’s apartment comes close, too). There are two (2) 1960s houses in Long Beach with magnificent indoor trees, but I can't find them online, so have this modern interpretation and cry with me about how I can't visit the multi-story fake tree inside Clifton's Cafeteria for a good long while:

2. Conventions of Fans of Any Kind

One thing that I don't think I'll ever lose is how much I *love* people who are fans of SOMETHING, people who have a passion and create something about it or cosplay it or simply gather to celebrate it and connect to other people through it. The Internet provides in all kinds of ways, but I'm talking specifically about IRL conventions and the way my heart pitter pats when I first walk in those doors, SWOON! And it doesn’t matter how big the convention is or how random, I've been to smaller events like CatCon and the My Little Pony convention all the way up to biggies like WonderCon and Comic Con, and I have yet to be disappointed. I might know jack shit about what I'm walking into, but I want to see the merch, hear about the panels, and check out the people who are fucking PUMPED to be there. Sadly, I think it's gonna be a lonnnnng time until these come back, but I can live vicariously through my old photos, sigh:

3. Dutch Wax Fabrics and African Fashion

I'm not the snazziest of dressers, but textiles, colors, and patterns have been an obsession that has soothed my visual soul for as long as I can literally remember. Wax fabric marries all three of those touchpoints, plus throws in a healthy dose of style, and I count myself lucky to have seen two big exhibits on the subject (this was one of them), oh, how I wish there were more! For sure, there's a fucked up underlying colonial/imperialist history here, but there's also humor and color and vibrancy, a reclamation of sorts, and multiple levels of fashion that take my breath away. I cannot do the different patterns justice at all, but the fan motif is one of my faves:

4. Hearst Castle vs. Madonna inn

These two fall into my #home tag because they're where I'm from, and they speak to me as equally sublime and ridiculous, camp and kitsch writ large and small, different (yet similar!) versions of Xanadu that two rich white men built as shrines to their own personal "taste." And the irony is that a lot of people shit on Alex Madonna for being tacky (the Madonna Inn is...uh, something else), yet praise WR Hearst for all the high-class art and architecture, most of which is fully lifted from desperate churches between and after world and yet they're both more or less the same concept (lodging for weary travelers, self-aggrandizement, questionable taste-mixing). Hearst Castle edges out slightly for me because it's bigger and has spectacular scenery and history, plus it gives me doses of LA noir thanks to the way Hearst killed a guy in a jealous Charlie Chaplin-related rage and Hedda Hopper covered it up, all kinds of old Hollywood shenanigans happened up there, etc. But I'm low-key an expert on both houses of the holy, I'm OBSESSED with both, and we can leave it at that. I mean, come on:

5. Snow Globes

I had to cull my personal collection slightly just to fit it all on the dedicated shelf in my bathroom, and I seriously need to refill all the water lines, but nothing beats a snow globe in terms of memorable souvenir, especially when you put it in a bathroom. The majesty!!! The jewel of my collection is the one from Sherwood Forest because WHY NOT celebrate a historic place and moment in the basic way?? He robbed from the rich to give to the poor, and the gift shop about 100 feet from the tree he hid in does the same! The circle of life! The irony of all the watermarks on this blessed image...protect:

6. Highly Specific Museums

Look, we can all agree that the more venerated museums in the world are a form of garbage in terms of what they represent, what they've done, and who runs them, but I'm here for the museums that collect and celebrate things that tend to get overlooked. There are too many to list that I love that are still thriving, so I'm going to say goodbye to four recently departed faves. RIP to the Pez museum, I'm so glad I saw you and purchased your stale candy souvenirs. RIP to the museum of terrible food, you were a pop up when Phoenix and I saw you, and I will forever think about the worker describing people literally vomiting during their visits. RIP to the currywurst museum in Berlin, I've had currywurst exactly once and it was not for me, but I respect the Journey you took me on, including obscure east German TV shows that helped make you so popular (??). Finally, RIP to the velvet painting museum, there's no way to mince words, the person who owned you was crazy AS FUCK and had zero clue how to run a business, but I'm so glad I saw you multiple times and purchased my own velvet treasure (not this exact one, but remarkably similar):

7. Liminal Spaces: Grocery Store Edition

Confession time for those who don't know me all that well, I'm a big time voyeur, and nothing fills my heart with joy like a walk at 7 or 8 pm, the witching hour when people haven't pulled the curtains, and I can scope out their decorations/furnishings without it being "weird." Another confession is how much I unabashedly adore grocery stores in other countries and will spend at least an hour wandering aisle by aisle, falling in love with how much everything is different yet completely the same:

8. Agatha Christie Novels:

As a child, I was a fairly compliant reader--I had to read something for school? Okay! For my mom? Sounds good! But the books that sparked the initial fire for me to read something purely for myself were second-hand (probably fourth- or fifth-hand, judging by cover art) Agatha Christie short story anthologies, which were the gateway drug to full Agatha Christie novels, then other mystery novels, and so on. But getting back to Agatha, I obviously loved all the stories, but every decade spawned incredibly good cover art (like, exceptionally good), and this particular artist's are right up near the top for me (I go back and forth on a lot of the '50s and '60s ones):

9. Scopitones

I link my obsession with scopitones both to my love of music videos in general and a shop in Austin, TX, that sold DVD compilations of them in particular, but either way, they're underappreciated and kitschy all in one! Francoise Hardy and the rest of the ye-ye's are my forever girls for this medium, but seemingly every country cranked them out, both actual set videos and "live" performances? If you don't know what they are, scopitones were machines that played music videos in French cafes in the '60s (??), so it was sort of your proto-MTV way to see your faves sing and dance. Oh, Francoise...so moderne!!

10. Cover Songs

I have so much patience and love for cover songs of any stripe, the more genre-bending and/or surprising, the better! My only minor beef is the trend in slooooooooowing down songs to make a point, but even those ones have a special place in my heart if they're effective. Live Lounge feeds my hunger the best, but my meta fave for representing this concept is Pulp's Bad Cover Version, which was already lyrically INSPIRED, a song about bad cover versions in terms of relationships, but then they did a video that was a visual "bad" cover version, with actors lip synching over an audio "bad" cover version, and all of it just worked? The cover for the single is someone in the band as a boy, making his own bad cover version of a Bowie album cover, it's meta meta meta, and I love love love, here's the video, if you're curious. In the more sublime cover category, I'm absolutely addicted to all of Orville Peck's covers, I truly hope he officially releases them sometime soon, but I wholeheartedly support any artist who does it:

[imaginingit]

high school au!haechan

GUESS WHO’S BACK !! in case you’ve never met anyone that embodies SUCH a typical high schooler like hyuck before, here u go ! may or may not have done the quarterback and band geek trope . i regret nothing 

oh BOY

first of all 

let’s backtrack a little bit and talk about middle school!haechan too cause...,,, dude is a Mess 

was the sketchy one in seventh grade that sold like g-shocks and silly bands at the hill in front of the park every lunch recess 

had a power ranger lunchbox all the way up until he was like 13 lol when yukhei would be like.....hyung......What.

during the summer when the school staff are making up the lists for the classes everyone’s like 

“nO no way he’s in a class with renjun, renjun is the only person he’ll ever be afraid of i can’t have that dispute in my class”

“um. hyuck can’t be in the same class as jisung either...i once saw him try to feed jisung yellow snow saying it was lemon flavoured... poor boy believed him...”

“mark’s mother gifted me a box of chocolates last year with a note thanking me for my hard work and begging her son to be in a different class than hyuck. sorry, guys.”

the principal looks over all the lists and is like UM these are bullshit reasons, just put all of them together, how bad could it be???

ahem. BAD.

every science class starts with chenle and yukhei SCREAMING the bill nye theme song do u guys watch the vlives my GOD i thought chenle was hard to keep up with and nOW THERE’S LUCAS 

dodgeball during phys-ed is just haechan, yukhei and jeno absolutely slaughtering everyone

mark has his headphones in the entire time in art class and if one of the guys try to talk to him he just raises his finger and shushes them

jeno and jaemin flirt 

renjun, chenle and yukhei trying to win jisung over and then ending up just swearing at each other in mandarin 

anyway

has been the football captain since he was at the youngest age that was  eligible to even sign up,,,,, he’s that good 

always always makes mark walk home with him after practice 

so mark just sits on the bleachers with his bio textbook in his lap and glasses slipping down his nose, pages just flying left and right from the wind, bored out of his mind like fUCking hyuck i hate u i hate waiting two hours for practice to end just so you can show me your new pokemon cards at home ffs

everytime there’s practice before school, he’s always the last one to stay on the field, promising coach he just wants to try another long catch

SO because he’s always late this BITch just runs straight to first period with sweaty hair and practice clothes and athletic tape still on his fingers 

renjun: you disgust me.

jaemin: here’s my deodorant. and jeno’s. and jisung’s. here take all of ours take it please just take it oh my gO d

loves this sport more than absolutely anything honestly 

his entire bedroom is just full of patriots posters and banners 

his mom pranked him on his birthday telling him to open the box on his bed with pats tickets inside 

ran upstairs crying hysterically and fucking opened it to find a picture of his siblings going HA YOU THOUGHT 

resented them for the rest of his life 

but this boy also really loves music!!

always performs a ballad every year at the school talent show with jisung doing some sort of contemporary performance

his parents are both fans of old schoolers, like abba & elvis & beatles such, so he grew up with the beautiful combination of football on the tv and ‘mamma mia’ spinning on the record player in the kitchen 

during his final middle school year, he performed a version of his favourite park hyoshin song, and finished with the entire school in uproar, cheering and screaming HYUCK HYUCK HYUCK!!! YES!!!

and so he puts the mic back on the stand and runs down the stage to his teammates waiting in the crowd

so excited and and ready to jump into their arms

only to witness a couple of them standing there motionless and checking their wrists, as if waiting from the start for his performance to be over 

he sees the defensive tackle of his team, some dude that probably shaves twice a day and is beefed BEYOND belief 

“hey man, abt time you’re done, coach wants to run over some plays for next week’s game against yg tech, let’s go”

and that was it

the hoard of guys in letterman jackets pull him into their midst and before he could even complain, they mercilessly make their way to the gym as a group

with renjun, chenle, jaemin, jeno, mark and yukhei all just standing there like ... o ... ok ... we just wanted to congratulate u, hyuck...

donghyuck never brings that moment up ever and the dreamies don’t question (yes lucas is a dreamie square up)

from then on, they notice hyuck’s been humming less and isn’t even commenting about day6′s new releases or how renjun’s grandfather bought a brand new record player from the most expensive record store in their town 

donghyuck continues being the school’s star quarterback and having meetings with minor league scouts every week 

they know it’s a touchy topic and being as close as they are with each other, they don’t pry hyuck about it and knows he’s the type to hold it in but will bring it up when he has to 

but unlike what they all think, hyuck doesn’t explode in anger or spite 

he finally opens up on a regular friday night when mark’s sleeping over after finishing a hefty assignment 

and mark is surprised that he prods on this topic with, not anger or spite, but ,,,,, fear? 

“hey mark.......what if this is the only thing i can do?"

“what do you mean?”

“i don’t want to just be some brainless jock” 

mark is a little... stunned... he’s known him all his life and this is the first time hyuck has shown any sign of fear?? of anything???

mark just scootches in a little closer....”you’re not brainless, and this won’t be the only thing you’ll be good at, i promise”

BUT OF COURSE they never speak of it again hyuck’s just kinda like hahahahahha emotions what ahahahah sadness what ahahhahah

but graduation hits and before the dreamies (and yukhei hehe) know it, it’s time for high school

all the upperclassmen know him and think he’s a little shit but love him anyway, so embraced him and all his friends when they entered 

fascinated by how much wider the hallways are and how BIG  the school actually is 

gets lost MORE FREQUENTLY THAN HE’D LIKE TO EVER ADMIT OUT LOUD .

tryouts for the football team are on like the second day 

was so excited!!!! to play with his close hyungs and co-captains jaehyun and youngho 

coach personally came up to him and was like .... boi it’s so rare for a freshman to be on the varsity team, hERE’S YOUR JERSEY NUMBER AND YOUR LOCKER AND YOUR EQUIPMENT AND YOUR OWN PERSONAL PRACTICE SCHEDULE I’LL WORK AROUND U IT’S OKAY 

is treated automatically like the superstar at the first official practice and honestly doesn’t ..,,know how to handle 

he’s only always been around his middle school friends, aka people he’s known all his life and who know he doesn’t like being smothered 

donghyuck knows he’s good but again, will anyone ever look him past the football?

mark sees all this new attention he’s getting and his heart silently breaks a bit knowing hyuck doesn’t truly want all of this

the football, yes !!! the clout, not really 

but hyuck is a freshman!! and knows he can’t speak up quite yet so he endures this superstar status already bestowed on him and forces his uncomfortable smile away 

it’s ok !! he tells himself

it’s good to be recognized for something you’re good at ..,, right ?

but as years pass and seniors graduate and championships continue to be won, hyuck slowly climbs up the popularity pyramid with it too

so by the first day of senior year, having just recently started getting close with the captain of the cheerleading squad and throwing the biggest party of the summer break as a last hurrah a few days prior, hyuck walks into the high school doors as the talk of the TOWN

all those stereotypical popular pretty boys you see on tv namely um troy bolton um austin ames um finn hudson um scott mccall um YES 

that’s literally him at this point 

loved by all students for being a social butterfly and not ??? an asshole ??? to those that aren’t as popular

teachers adore him cause he participates in class and always hands assignments in on time despite his student schedule and always gifts them little holiday baskets at the end of every semester

renjun had junior year chem with him and almost threw his paper out the window when he saw hyuck’s mark

“how are you this good ,,,,,,,, when you don’t even DO anything?!” 

point is, he’s at the top of his game

and this year, senior year, the stakes for the championship are higher than ever; with hyuck’s school topping the rankings for the east, they’ll likely be meeting with the champion team in the west for the finals, and coach claims he hasn’t seen a matchup this neck-and-neck in terms of stats, style of play, and pairing matchups in .,,,, years

so there’s absolutely no screwing around this year - losing is not an option

but overall, haechan believes he has his shit planned out: there were assignments, then exams, then playoffs, then the championships, followed by celebrations here and there, and then hopefully a scholarship, followed by graduation and then college, and then it’ll just be the flower road from there

what he really doesn’t factor in, though, is a certain captain of a certain school marching band, swooping in to save his ass for the first time of many,,,,many more to come 

it happens on a regular tuesday afternoon 

you two shared the same stupid humanities elective class during last period, and it didn’t dawn upon him that a rough copy of this useless visual presentation was due today that he did nOT even know was even assigned 

the teacher comes around with her pointy ass glasses and a clipboard decorated in purple flower stickers, visibly softening at an obviously panicked hyuck 

“hello, donghyuck, ready to show me the rough copy?” 

“well,,,,see i-i um ,,, i”

THE ENTIRE CLASS IS SILENT AT THIS POINT BC

????? LEE DONGHYUCK FORGOT AN ASSIGNMENT? 

the teacher kind of urges him on, half in disbelief and half in pity at how scared he looks for the first time ever

he’s still trying to conjure up a plausible excuse, all the while LITERALLY WANTING TO HIT HIMSELF IN THE HEAD

ugh ur so stUPID, hyuck, he thinks, coach even ended practice early last night too and all u did was binge the last airbender for the 80th time AGAIn like a DUMBASS ugh 

so there’s a couple more awkward moments of silence 

until

“oh, ms kwon! i should have said something, haha we partnered up for this one! i have it on my laptop here!!”

his flushed face whips around and lands on you 

in your oversized knit sweater and cute skinny blue jeans ripped at the knee, round glasses threatening to fall from your nose 

and a surge washes over him he’s neve r ev  er felt before 

relief ?? ya, sure. we’ll call it that for now 

the teacher looks at you, then back at hyuck with an eyebrow cocked and you steal that moment to send him a nod and stern look in your eyes

he’s spluttering at this point 

“ye-yeah, sorry miss, just a little tired and f-frazzled i guess...”

the teacher kind of just gives herself a knowing smile, as sort of a “heh....alrighty then” but walks over to your desk nonetheless 

the entire class seems to buy it too, and go back to their white noise chatter 

hyuck lets out the loudest exhale before scrambling to his feet over to you just glaring at him with a knowing smile and your arms crossed across your chest

“i’m so soRRY I DON’T EVEN KNOW YOUR NAME WHY DID YOU JUST DO THAT FOR ME YOU REALLY DIDN’T HAVE TO i’m s o sorry i had practice late last night and holy crap it just totally slipped by me and-”

he stops at the sight of you bursting into a fit of giggles and is even more ??? confused ?? hes so frazzled

you: “it’s ok, you idiot, i know you always get stuff in on time anyway” 

and he shuts right back up and turns BRIGHT RED bc who even is this person? who’s so cute n helpful 

you: “i’m y/n btw!! i’m captain of the marching band for ur team” 

and the lightbulb visibly clicks for hyuck 

“OOOOH so that’s why you look so familiar!!” 

so the two of you chat away about playoffs coming up and the championships the last few years and how it’s so strange neither of you have crossed paths in the pass when you’ve had so many connections

and you kind of just smile and nod at that 

because you fully know why 

lee donghyuck, captain and quarterback of the football team

lee donghyuck, school heartthrob and teachers’ favourite

lee donghyuck, the social butterfly and the amicable figure in every situation 

he had always been there, practicing on the field in front of you as you tried to pry your eyes off of him and run the trumpet section one more time,,.,,,,he was always there, but always so??? unreachable???

you couldn’t pretend you never laid eyes on him on freshman orientation day when he was being stopped by every person he walked by to be high fived and welcomed to the team

and thought wow . his skin? his aura? the way his smile lights up the whole goddamn room? 

and you’re in a lot of classes with jaemin and always see hyuck drop by a few minutes before class to sit and goof around before getting lovingly chastised by the teacher 

but never reached out to say hi or anything 

he was always too unreachable 

BUT OF COURSE you don’t say anything and instead just smile at the ground and shrug 

“guess that’s just the way we’re supposed to be, you know?” 

and just as he was about to ask what you meant by that, the bell rings and you let out a breath you didn’t even realize you were holding 

like w Ow a whole 1 hour class w ur crush and he’s finally talking to you ???? TOO MUCH FOR ONE DAY 

you don’t even utter a goodbye  but just give him a bright, knowing smile, stuff your papers into your bag and leave for the day 

and even as the classmates pack up and the teacher is gone and hyuck knows he doesn’t have practice today but needs to get home bc he promised his mom he would help with her flat tire, he can’t find it in himself to stand up and leave 

he’s sitting there processing your words, and just,,,,you

“i’ve really been around y/n this whole time and didn’t even know it?” 

suddenly he just feels stricken with guilt and shame and remembers all the time the ball landed by the bleachers and you exCitedly running down the steps to toss it back clumsily 

he remembers always smiling back and saying “thanks”, but never quite meeting the eyes of the person 

he lets out a grumble and just plunks his head onto the wooden desk loudly 

chenle and jisung come bc they were all supposed to walk home together 

and just see a slumped hyuck bumping his head up and down on the table whispering “stupid, ,,,,, so stupid” over and over again

jisung: he did it oh my god it’s done it broke him football finally broke him HIGH SCHOOL FUCKING BROKE HIM 

so after fixing the tire and helping clean after dinner and finally lying in bed that night

he makes this silent promis e ??? to make it up to u somehow ?? 

you both wake up the next day, both w each other lingering in your minds, and both unsure of what to do to get rid of it 

though hyuck isn’t sure he wants to 

you both daze off during classes and stare at the back of the head of the person in front of you,,,,just,,, thinking 

and then it’s time for fifth period 

and you don’t think you’ve ever speedwalked so fast to a class before 

people start pouring in and as the second bells starts to ring you still don’t see his face and you decide getting your hopes up all day for no reason was just stupid 

the teacher is about to start the class before the door opens one last time and you see a visibly flustered hyuck shuffle in 

right into the seat next to you 

what you don’t know is two minutes prior to this, poor dude was in the bathroom rinsing his face and trying to do something, anytHING to get the blush off his cheeks but to no avail 

so the lesson today was about families and societies and you swear the next ten minutes felt like forty 

your eyelids start getting a little heavier before you hear the scratching of a pencil on paper 

he’s marked the side of your notebook with a little “hello ^-^” 

you try to conceal the beaming smile threatening to creep on ur face but you really can’t

you’re just a little whipped aren’t u

that entire class is then just spent doodling stupid things on each other’s notebooks and giggling and even had to have the teacher turn to you guys and give a stern look before realizing it was hyuck and just BEAMED 

by the time the class ended you were packing your stuff up to leave before he gRabs your hand 

“what the--?” 

he takes your thumb and places it on the fingerprint scanner before fiddling with something on it 

your mind immediately sprinted to the WORST IDEAS

“he’s hacking my instagram right now isn’t he he’s telling my family on facebook that i do drugs, isn’t he LEE DONGHYUCK GIVE ME MY PHONE”

so you start to fumble for it before he hands it back to you calmly,

“i’ll be expecting a text tonight”

and then he’s gone 

SMOOTH ISN’T HE 

and that was the start of the cutest friendship ever ???? 

you guys talk about anything and everything, from the colour of your room to his sister’s favourite food to the one time you fell from your treehouse and had to get stitches to the time lucas got stuck in a slide on a children’s playground when they all decided to sneak out at like 11pm at night and had to call the fire department to come get him out 

and texts eventually turn into calls and calls eventually turn into being inseparable at school

the boys LOVE YOU and immediately pinned you on their side to torture hyuck together

and as time goes by, all the boys start noticing changes in hyuck and how he would never do anything with them without mentioning your name

like they’d be out having ice cream after studying at jisung’s and he’d absentmindedly mention that this lemon ice cream is the perfect colour of your room and that yellow is your favourite colour 

or that the disco ball in jaemin’s basement is exactly the one you have dangling on the rearview mirror in your car 

so WINK WINK NUDGE NUDGE but the boys respect you enough to not tell you yet bc you deserve to have hyuck confess on his own

you guys hang out any chance you get and it isn’t till near spring formal that he comes over with some mcdonalds that you realize you’ve gotten so comfortable so fast 

so you both settle into the kitchen before he opens up the big mac, takes off one of the buns of the burger, to reveal ketchup dotted across the patty spelling “SF? :D” bc the patty was too small to spell the full words, “spring formal?” lol 

and you scoff and throw a fry at him bc of course you’d go with him 

and your heart’s just racing for the rest of the night

after dinner you head out to your backyard and lay a blanket on the grass to stare up at the stars 

hyuck knows a lot about astrology so you love just lying there and hearing him tell you about the lyra constellation and its myths 

you spend the night just giggling and laughing and shoving each other around before it starts to get really late and he knows he should be going 

but he can’t seem to move

and so he asks,

“hey, are you mad at me?”

and you’re a little,,,confused before you reply, “for spilling jisung’s apple juice on my laptop the other day? just a little, but i’ll forgive you if you pay for my spring formal ticket for me hehe”

he rolls his eyes and scoffs and says, “no you idiot”

you can’t think of why you’d be upset with him, considering it was just a regular night for you two

he explains, “you know.....for not really knowing you before this year”

your heart kind of sank bc you weren’t really expecting it but you also deep deep deep down seriously wished he would never bring this up 

it’s silence until you answer

“no, because i don’t blame you for it” 

“what do you mean”

“well...” you know it’s a tough thing to tell him but you know he’ll listen to your words

“you’ve just always been unreachable, you know? like i remember seeing you on freshmen orientation day and just thinking, you know, this guy is just something else,,,something i’ll never be. and over the years, i made my peace with that, bc that’s just the situation you were thrust in,,, you know, football and parties and stuff”

and hyuck’s heart sinks with each word because you really mentioned everything he was afraid of,,,,that he was only ever gonna be popular because of football,,,,and that he never really had a say before he was thrust into the social status he’s in now 

just as he’s about to clear his throat from emotions and get up to spout some stupid excuse on why his mom wants him home now even though she was probably already in bed, you continue

“but....now i know that’s not all that you are...you’re kind and smart and sweet and funny, and yeah you’re crazy good at football but you’re also crazy good at singing and science and fixing tires and vacuuming and playing with your little sister and making people laugh,,,that’s why you’re my friend now”

hyuck doesn’t realize how long he stares at you after you said that before you wave your hand in front of his face ((”uh dude.....”))

he feels tears welling up in his throat so he just lies back down and makes some nonchalant comment again, playing it all off like he usually does

“mhm okay yea enough with the sappiness i just wanted to know if the geeky band girl hates the quarterback captain like they typically do okay blah blah”

but you and him both know

you’re both concealing smiles as you lay there, staring at the stars 

he’s never heard anyone talk about him like that before 

and you’ve always known that he was still a little unsure of himself 

and maybe this just put this all to rest 

and as you both lay there with the sound of your own frantic heartbeats in your ears, you dwell on the fact that maybe it shouldn’t be beating that hard,,,,that fast,,,,

ANYWAY

senior year is going by, and before you guys know it, championships are in three days  

your school wins the semi-finals in dramatic fashion, with the winning touchdown seconds before the final whistle 

and you couldn’t make it to that game bc of a huge assignment due the next day but hyuck makes sure to call you as soon as he grabbed his stuff from the locker room 

“hEY WHERE ARE YOU GOING WE’RE GOING TO MINGYU’S HOUSE FOR DRINKS TO CELEBRATE”

“SORRY DUDES SOMETHING IMPORTANT CAME UP!!! HAVE FUN WITHOUT ME!!”

it was only a beat of silence before jungwoo just scoffed and shrugged, “someone’s WHIPPPEEEDDD” 

hyuck just blushes red and runs out in the midst of the entire locker room hollering and throwing sweaty towels at him 

bc he knows he doesn’t really have feelings for you, does he? 

these past few months have been amazing but it can’t be 

all he does know is 

how your hair smells like vanilla when you whip your head around to scold him for pinching your sides 

how your eyes crinkle when you laugh at some pun you read on reddit 

how your fingers get really bad circulation so they’re always cold and red and you have to make sure to wear sweaters during the winter to keep them warm

how you hate helping out the flutes cause they’re always screechy 

how you started playing the saxophone because your grandma did when she was in college 

how your eyes light up when someone mentions your favourite tv show character 

how you hate carrots but he always makes you eat them cause they’re good for you and you just sit there all pouty

how much he loves loves LOVES when you come over to just do nothing like sit on his windowsill and read or go through his old childhood pictures for the millionth time and giggle at every cute smiley one for the millionth time

he’s standing there in the middle of the field with his phone in his hand, dangling by his side, with you hollering through the receiver like “,,,,hello? bitch u called ME, HELLO?!!” 

and he just mumbles a “uh i gotta go sorry i’ll tell you about it tomorrow” 

and hangs up

cause fuck 

he’s in love isn’t he 

and he’s lying in bed again that night, knowing that he wants to tell you but he’s also so afraid, cause you’re his best best best (sorry mark) friend

and he’s never gotten so close to anyone so fast 

and he loves going to practice early with you so you guys can grab breakfast before 

and how he always makes sure to “accidentally” miss a toss and have it land on your head while you’re running a piece

so he tosses and turns all night 

before he comes to a decision

he knows the marching band always has practice on the bleachers every wednesday morning, coinciding with the team’s morning practice as well  

he rips his sheets off his tired body but surges up and runs to his computer, types in a few things onto the search engine and presses “print” 

it’s the next morning, and as you groggily heave yourself up from your bed, dreading having to deal with the flutes and their screeching sharps today, you also think abt hyuck and you wonder why he was acting so weird last night

but you brush it off as fatigue from a long and gruelling game 

it’s a beautiful day outside already at 7:00 in the morning, with just the slightest bit of chilliness and dew on the morning grass, and hyuck thinks it’s no accident that the sun decided to come out today too 

he holds the crinkly sheets of music in his hands, slightly shaking and profusely sweating, somehow nervous bc of someone he admires for the first time ??? in his life ???? 

he practically sprints to school, wanting to be there before you do

he spots the majority of the marching band already there and he sighs in relief when he doesn’t spot you

“hEy guys!” he runs up to the bleachers 

and he stops for a second before he realizes like ..... all these people look like deers in headlights bc ,, ,,,,,, the quarterback,,,,isn’t here with you?? aren’t you guys always stuck beside each other ????

“i’m s o sorry i don’t have a lot of time to explain and i know its confusing and this is gonna be such a rush but here !!!!” 

he hands out the sheet music to everyone there and makes them promise to not let you know about it 

everyone exchanges confusing looks ((one dude’s just like ‘fuck man it’s too early in the morning for secrets’)) but end up agreeing anyway and haechan doesn’t even have time to celebrate before he hears his teammates starting to make their way out of the practice room

he runs over to seungkwan, your best friend in band and someone who haechan knows won’t hold his word unless a bribe is involved

“okay look i know you’re y/n’s best friend but you have to promise me you won’t let her know about this okay?”

seungkwan props his clarinet on his shoulders, almost as if he was holding a baseball bat instead and does his best to puff his shoulders like “HMPH well what do i get out of this??”

“if you can establish a secret rehearsal time for tomorrow with the rest of the band where i can come and rehearse with you, i’ll set you up with our running back” bc god fucking knows vernon and seungkwan have been crushing on each other for years but have never had the guts to go NEAR each other and haechan is just sick of vernon’s endless daydreaming in the locker room 

seungkwan goes BRIGHT RED before clearing his throat and muttering “ugh fiNe” under his breath even tho he’s finally !!!!!! gonna talk to hansol !! agghhhhh!!!! 

haechan practically blows him a million kisses and runs off to the locker room before seungkwan asks

“HEY ummmm but uh why are you doing this?”

haechan sighs and feels he can’t even begin to explain himself without becoming a blubbering mess

so he just reassures him with a, “you’ll see”

hyuck doesn’t come to class that day even though you swore you saw him at practice 

he had cancelled breakfast w you earlier that morning and only waved to you once during practice, but again, you credit that to the finals being in 48 hours 

you shoot him a “cute bum where u from” text in hopes of getting his attention

“okay but no seriously WHERE ARE U I HATE MS KWON SO MUCH”

and no answer again 

you huff and give up and know he’ll message when he has to 

what you don’t know is he made sure to steer clear of you from now until the championships bc 1. he’s still not sure what he can do around you anymore now that he Knows how he Feels 

and 2. bc his hands are just glued to the sheet music, trying to rehearse as much as he can for this little surprise he has planned for you 

so all he does is just send you back a simple “not feeling well, just gonna rest up until the game” 

and your heart sinks bc you guys haven’t gone 48 hours without talking since like 8 months ago 

regardless, with championships coming up and endless school assignments piling up, you’re pretty well distracted 

but you do also silently curse yourself for imagining every quote in romeo and juliet to be hyuck and you 

and how every hour of those 48 hours seemed so excruciating and long and empty bc both of you were so busy 

so by the time it’s game day, you are restless and in so much yearning for a presence you never knew you needed this bad 

but you know, as soon as the game’s over, you can hopefully run into his arms and congratulate him 

ahem platonically ofc ahem, you try to convince yourself 

you get to the field and it’s already bustling with mascots and spectators and streamers and you can barely hear the sound of the band warming up above all the noise 

intros begin and you guys start playing the opening pieces as the banner rips and out runs 

hyuck

and it’s like suddenly the earth just . stops 

looking at him running out, eyes blazed and all determined and strong made you feel so much all at once, you could feel your knees starting to buckle

and it didn’t really help when, mid run, he turns his head to you and gives a subtle smile and wink before heading to the center of the field 

you bite back a beaming smile of your own

for the next two hours, that’ll have to be enough 

and there wasn’t a single doubt in your body that they were gonna lose 

the game starts and the volume doesn’t dim for even a second 

you feel yourself sweating profusely through your blue and white uniform with each toss and whistle and tackle and you swear you’ve never been so nervous in your life 

it’s the final quarter and your school is down by just a touchdown and you swear you won’t be able to handle this anymore it’s toO MUCH

you glance up at the stands to see yukhei holding chenle’s head and screaming and jaemin with his head in his hands and jeno just closing his eyes ((”i can’t watch i can’t watch i can’t watch”)) and mark and jisung grabbing onto each other muttering things that look like praying ??? 

you even spot former alumni, youngho, taeyong and jaehyun, biting their nails and clasping their hands 

there’s barely a minute left and the ball is in our possession 

you hear hyuck echo a “HUT!! HUT HUT” before he tosses the ball in the air

it’s like time slows down as you see the running back catch it and dash for the end 

THE ENTIRE FIELD IS ON THEIR TOES as you watch your team’s defence tackle and hammer people out of vernon’s way 

he’s going and going and just before the horn blows for the end of the game, he crosses the line and 

EVERYONE GOES INSANE

the horn blows for the final second and once again, you guys have done it 

everyone from the stands pours down onto the field and before you can process it, mark and the boys are running up to you and dog-piling you, dragging you into the crowd with them

they did it!!! hyuck did it!!!! 

there are streamers and confetti everywhere but your eyes are just straining and stretching, looking for him 

it’s just loud, white noise for a second before you hear something behind you 

your band is in position and you see seungkwan counting them in for the opening beats

your heart starts to panic to remember if you forgot you had another piece to perform?????

the opening chords to a familiar classic starts playing and before you can even react 

there’s a voice in a mic 

and the sound of someone singing 

and it’s hyuck 

the band plays along with him and you’re just,,,,,perplexed and confused as to what he’s doing 

until you realize he’s looking straight at you

the swing beat starts to get everyone in the crowd singing and dancing 

but you’re frozen in your spot 

did he plan this?? what is he doing and how did you not know about it???? you feel hands behind you and eyes start to land on you as the boys push you forward and hyuck starts making his way onto the field to where you’re standing 

the crowd gets even louder and the music gets even happier as he’s dancing and grooving his way to you 

and then there he is, right in front of you 

his voice has you hypnotized and you’re absolutely sure this is a dream 

you guys move together to the beat, never taking eyes off one another and you just have an amazed expression on your face the entire time 

the songs comes to a beautiful climactic end and you still have no idea what’s going on

the lyrics still echo in your head

“hey, hey, baby....i want to know if you'll be mine...when i saw you walking down the street, i said that’s someone i’d like to meet,,,”

and the entire school is watching ((INCLUDING HYUCK’S PARENTS AND YOUR TEACHERS))) and your head is just spinning, spinning, spinning

he lowers the mic and just leans close and rests his forehead on yours and whispers his words to you

“i love you, and i’m so sorry it took so long but i really really do, i just hope i can make up for all the time lost,” 

his eyes are pouring emotions into yours and for some reason you want to cry 

his team just won a championship!!!! scouts are probably here, scribbling his name down for a scholarship right now!! and everyone on this field was just yelling and whooping his name a second ago!!! 

yet he’s standing here, so vulnerable and nervous in front of you 

so you grab his face and swallow your nerves

and tell him you love him, you’ve loved him for so long 

all you hear is just muted yelling and cheering and whooping around you before you swear you see a glisten in his eyes as he leans and swoops you in for a kiss 

the band is going off and playing some other 80s love tune and there is still confetti just flying all over the place and people running up to you and hugging you guys 

but his hand is still entangled in yours and he just winks 

bc in the midst of all the chaos and all the noise of being such a superstar, there you are 

and he’s sure that’s all he’ll need 

[familyiswhoyouchoose]

Lights, Camera, Act Right (CH 1)

Most men in Hanzo's line of work lived glamorously if not gaudy lives adorned with drugs, jewels, cars, and their personal preference of company to keep the lonely nights at bay. While it was undeniable that they might've had a passion for their art - he couldn't find it in himself to respect someone who blatantly threw their wealth around as if it contributed even an inch to their acting ability. Which led him to the predicament that he was in now. Staring into the eyes of a harpy who'd yelled herself hoarse and red-faced after he made it explicitly clear that no matter how much of a tantrum she threw or how many zeros she put in her offer, he would not be her eye candy to the premiere that evening. It wasn't her fault really, she was a lovely woman before all of the screaming and ranting, and Hanzo figured any man would've been happy to be on her arm. However, he wasn't just any man and he certainly wasn't interested in someone who wanted to pay for his company. The very thought sent shivers down his spine. After all, he made enough money from the use of his likeness and the movies that he'd starred in along with the TV show cameos and other media outlets. And with the way the paparazzi were flashing their cameras, he could only assume that this would be another "cash cow" so to speak but also a headache for another time. His phone vibrated in his pocket, dragging his attention away from the fuming woman whose agent had scurried over to try and help her save face by calming her down. The man's pleas fell on deaf ears as Hanzo took the call, plugging one of his ears with a knuckle to better hear the person on the other line. "Hoho, you are in trouble, anija!" Genji said in a sing-song voice, the smug satisfaction practically dripping from his words. "The news spread that quickly?" Hanzo asked, turning on his heel and ignoring the irate cry of 'Get back here!' as he left the lobby area of the hotel, making a beeline for the elevator. "Yup," Genji replied, popping the 'p' in the way that Hanzo knew the situation was steadily going from bad to worse. "Says that you told her off and she was going to give you a piece of her mind." Hanzo sighed, thankful that he was alone in the elevator. The commotion from outside paired with security hindered most of the traffic flow into the building allowing him to slip away unnoticed for the time being. With his own security guarding the entrance, a lack of people flooding the halls and the elevators, Genji’s voice was all he had to listen to.

Though that meant his plans for going out to get food were shot even if he was wearing a disguise. "She offered to give me a small fortune, Genji." "Oooh, wrong move," Genji tutted. "You know you're priceless, anija." Hanzo rolled his eyes. While his fame and wealth had brought him a considerable amount of prestige, little brothers would always be little brothers. The elevator’s chime alerted him to reaching the uppermost level and he stepped off with a cursory glance down either side of the hall. Fishing his key card from his pocket, he headed to his room, listening to Genji chatter on about his day and the progress he’d made with editing and posting up his videos.

“Comments on YouTube are the funniest thing in the world, brother, I’m telling you,” Genji cackled, the clacking of keys carrying over the phone’s receiver.

Hanzo unlocked his room door and slipped inside, pulling off his shoes while balancing his phone between his shoulder and ear. “When they aren’t fighting against each other for ‘first’ or insulting one another’s mother?”

Stumbling forward after getting them off, he set them neatly by the door and made way for his bed, undoing his top knot as he went.

“Well, at least it’s a lot easier to get comments on YouTube than it is on fanfiction,” Genji answered, Hanzo’s sharp gasp eliciting raucous laughter, loud enough that he had to move the phone away from his ear.

If looks could kill, his phone would’ve been dead ten times over as he glared at the receiver as if it offended his entire family just by existing to relay such a horrendous message. “You swore to never mention that again,” he hissed, sitting down and slowly bringing it back to his ear. “Youswore Genji.”

“Yeah, well, all is fair in love and validation,” Genji said, not sounding sorry in the slightest.

Hanzo huffed and laid back on the duvet with a heavy thump, bouncing slightly as the mattress shifted beneath his weight. One hand combing through his hair while the other settled the phone between his shoulder and head again, he set to taking off his watch and wrist bracelet, pausing when he caught sight of the time. Genji’s laughter and chatter faded away as Hanzo sat up abruptly, knocking the phone across the bed. His head on a swivel towards the digital clock on his bedside table, 5:45 PM flashing at him in bright white letters.

Keeping his gaze on the clock, he slowly lifted up the phone to his ear and caught the tailwind of another of Genji’s stories about opening fan letters. There wasn’t any sound beyond his little brother’s ranting — as if he was home alone. Hanzo’s eyes narrowed.

“Genji,” Hanzo interrupted, voice eerily calm and quiet. “What time is it for you?”

“Uh.. about two forty-five, wh—” Genji paused mid sentence and Hanzo felt the other shoe drop when a muffled noise and sharp cry of ‘fuck’ came through on the other side.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Hanzo groaned and squeezed his eyes shut, feeling another raging headache coming on. “Genji, tell me you remembered to pick up the boys from school,” he pleaded, hoping that his little brother was just in his work room rather than home alone at 2:45 in the afternoon… on a school day.

“What was that…?” Genji asked, muffled crackling noises coming through and Hanzo held the phone a little ways from his ear, glaring at it with disdain. “Sorry Hanzo, I wasn’t.. Oh no, the connection is breaking… I…”

There was absolutely no way the connection could be breaking. Genji prided himself on his data and uploading speed, if even one of his videos or calls lagged, he would throw a fit. And Hanzo would never hear the end of it. Eyebrow twitching, Hanzo breathed in deeply and counted backwards from ten before exhaling.

“Genji, I swear to you,” he began, praying to the heavens for patience.

“Relax, brother,” Genji chided, although he sounded slightly out of breath, from running to the car if Hanzo’s guess was right. “I’m only… fifteen minutes late.”

Hanzo pursed his lips, sucking his teeth as a thought came to mind. “Do you remember that ‘Worlds Best Uncle’ mug I got for you?”

“Use it everyday,” Genji chirped.

Hanzo smiled thinly, whispering ominously. “I’m breaking it into pieces.”

“No, brother please, anything but the mug!”

“Then your face,” Hanzo said dryly, scowling at the wall. “I’m breaking your face.”

Genji sighed. “Well, the mug was nice while it lasted.”

It was moments like this that Hanzo wished he’d gotten the dog that he asked for instead of the screaming pink-faced raisin that was Genji Shimada. Alas, thirty-five years later, he was still stuck with him for better or worse. Right now though, it was worse.

“ Genji .”

“My face is what makes me money, brother!” Genji shouted, the sound of a car door unlocking making Hanzo roll his eyes. “And you know what they say about your money maker.”

“If you don’t pick up your nephews in the next ten minutes, your older brother will smash it?”

A beat of silence passed between them, only the sounds of Genji clicking his seatbelt to Hanzo’s relief filling the void before his brother spoke again with a deadpan tone. “....That was terribly literal.”

“The clock is ticking, Genji,” Hano replied, making a ‘tick tock’ noise, biting back laughter at Genji’s exaggerated groan.

“Okay, okay. I’ll call you back when I get them, Dadzo .”

Seizing up at the nickname, Hanzo shouted indiginantly,  “Gen—” before three soft beeps punctuated the end of the call leaving him alone in his hotel room staring at the obnoxious display picture of his brother when he’d dyed his hair an eye-gouging shade of green. Sliding through his apps, Hanzo opened up one of his photo albums and shuffled backwards onto the bed until his back pressed against the headboard, thumbing through the photos until he found one of two boys smiling at the camera and waving.

The caption beneath it reading ‘Shingen and Hayao stole your phone - Genji’. Hanzo snorted, shaking his head as he switched from the photo album to his voice mails, scrolling through to one of the most recent saved ones. Pressing it, he waited for it to start playing, smiling as two young voices laughing and yelling filled the background with Genji’s trying to talk over them.

“Hanzo! Answer your phone! Ugh, hey guys, could you come here real fast?”

Dogs barking and loud footsteps followed, the noise muffled on the other end, Genji’s voice further away and hard to make out.

“On the count of three… real loud… home early…”

Hanzo knew what was coming and held his phone further from his ear when two loud voices yelled, “Dad, we miss you!”, at the same time. It nearly blew his eardrum the first time he listened in — afraid that something might’ve happened. Only to find that it was one of his brother’s pranks but also a heartfelt message. Genji’s laughter coming through as he said, “Come home soon, brother! And call me back, you do know how a phone works right?”

Hanzo rolled his eyes heavenward but his smile fell. The room seemed… so much bigger in the absence of voices or other persons. It was strange.

“Maybe I have been away from home too long,” he muttered, rewinding the message and laying his phone beside him, letting it play out again.

His eyes fluttered shut and he breathed in deeply. Perhaps if he just imagined it, it would feel like he was at home.

[julies-butterflies]

first lines   ::   a writing game

rules :   list the first lines of your last 20 stories  ( if you have less than 20, just list them all! )   see if there are any patterns.  choose your favorite opening line. then tag 10 of your favorite authors!!     ---   i’m going to be ranking mine  x / 10,  with comments, just for the heck of it.

1.   with friends like these   ( 2100, gen, phantoms friendship )

“Dude,” says Reggie, after the third — or maybe fourth — time it happens. “You... doin’ okay?”

verdict :   starting off with a line of dialogue is always an effective way to throw the audience right into the story, without a lot of build - up exposition.  and i... get carried away with the exposition sometimes.   this was my first ever JATP fic, so i was just trying to get a feel for the characters voices  ---   starting off with dialogue felt like a good place to begin!    7 / 10, vague but it works, and i can hear reggie’s voice clearly!

2.   even if we hit the ground  ( 3200, pre-canon, shameless reggie whump )

It all explodes in an instant, so fast that no one gets the chance to react.

verdict :   this line punches!!  it’s supposed to punch, it’s supposed to feel like the audience just got caught up in an explosion, because reggie literally does!   ( this is the story in which i establish the precedent of Hurting Reggie in my fics, just because he’s there. )      9 / 10,  super effective line

3.   if i didn’t know better  ( 3500, grief fic, julie centric )

Doctor Turner always said the special days would be the hardest.

verdict :   it’s...  okay.  i mean, it accomplishes what it needs to, but it’s nothing special.   this story holds a very dear place in my heart, and might be my favorite  ---  i wrote it to help cope with my sister’s very recent death, and frankly, it was just what i needed at the time.  i love the story as a whole more than this opening line.   5 / 10

4.   21st century (dead) teen rebellion   ( 2100, willex, ghoul bois antics )

If Alex knew exactly how he gets talked into half the things he does, he’d know how to avoid them, and his life would be so much easier.

verdict :   bahahaha, it’s sad because it’s true!!  i love this story, and this line  ---  while a bit cluttered  ---  makes me giggle.   7 / 10

5.   how to be a heartbreaker    ( 7500, luke character study, light jukebox )

Luke learns the danger of a crying woman early.

verdict :   this story was a constant surprise.  i didn’t expect it to get as long as it did  ;  i never expected it to take off the way it did, oh my gosh  ;  and there are parts of it i really like, and parts i’m more ‘meh’ about.   this opening line is good, it absolutely works in the scope of the story...  i just feel i could have done it better somehow.   but...  it leads into a whole segment with baby luke, so no regrets.   5 / 10

6.   nothing quite like living on the edge   ( 6200, missing scene after ‘nothing to lose’  ;  the boys trapped at caleb’s club )

By the time Caleb’s song reaches its grand finale, self-control is trickling back to them…  slowly, slowly, like the reverberation of the final notes.

verdict :   heehee...  like the entirety of ‘nothing to lose’, this line is delightfully unnerving.   caleb’s weird not-quite-mind-control was a topic i just had to explore in greater detail, so i really took it and ran with it.  this isn’t exactly a whump fic, but none of the boys are having a good time... and i get to explore a much darker tone, which works really well with my writing style.   overall, one of my favorite stories, and an excellent line.   9 / 10

7.   every empty space   ( 2900, emily patterson study, growing up luke )

Raising Luke was never easy, even for a moment… but in the beginning, it was a dream come true.

verdict :   the first half of this line was the main thesis for the entire story...  and i love how it sets up emily’s entire pov, and her arc over the course of 17 years, in a really effective way.  ilove writing emily because i relate to her  ---  i also look at luke and think “my beautiful, stupid son” daily.   fun story, great opener.   8 / 10

8.   revelations   (3200, gen, boys coming back to life, ray finds out )

The night of the Orpheum performance is definitely the start of something… and things never go back to normal after that.

verdict :   this is a very sexy leading line!  it’s informative, it’s ominous, and sets up a fun story / series.  i can get behind this!!  8 / 10

9.   sugar, how'd you get so fly?   ( 3000, gen, alex learns to fly, help him )

Her mom used to call it the “Mama Spidey Sense”;  a very loud, very accurate superpower that only parents have, to let them know when something is Going Down.

verdict :   ...  meh.  i like the idea, it’s a very rose vibe, but.  i don’t love it.  doesn’t have a lot to do with the rest of the story.  i think i just honestly didn’t know how to kick things off.  3 / 10

10.   know that it's probably magic   ( 4600, gen, soul bonding w/ spirits )

It takes a while for the boys to figure out all the weirdness that comes with being a ghost — and for Julie, on her end, to sort out living with a haunted band.

verdict :  opening lines work best when they’re short and pithy.  this... feels a bit cluttered, not going to lie.  while it definitely sets up the rest of the story, i feel like there was a more concise way to do it, if i just dug around a bit more.  i love this story as a whole more than this actual line.   ( also, ‘haunted band’??  does that even make sense??  girl... )   4 / 10

11.   still alive but i’m bearly breathing   ( 4100, possessed teddy bear )

Honestly, if she hadn’t been zoning out on her history essay long enough for her eyes to wander, Julie might’ve never noticed anything was wrong at all.

verdict :    uhhhh....  i don’t know how to talk about this one, actually.  midterm season is one hell of a drug.   ( another theme in my stories?  really putting alex through it.  not in a whumpy way, just in a ‘fml’ way. )  fine opening line, 6 / 10

12.   regenesis    ( 28000, multichapter, reggie whump / backstory )

Carlos is the first one to bring it up.

verdict :   this story!!  i love this story so much!!  while this opening line is the definition of ‘meh’, the story itself is such a favorite, and was so much fun to write.  i’d rank the story itself 10/10...  this line, though, will have to get  4 / 10

13.   paint a picture of it   ( 1800, gen, julie + reggie become art buddies )

“These are amazing! You’re really playing with color composition here, I like how you blend it all together.”

verdict :   can you tell i’m bullshitting my way through art terminology?  oof.  i started off this story with an entire conversation, through literally just dialogue  ;  i don’t love it, but it works well enough.   5 / 10

14.   interwoven   ( 2500, emily adopts sunset curve via knitting )

They break her heart sometimes, just a bit — her eager boy and his habit of bringing home strays.

verdict :   luke and emily patterson, out here once again, breaking my heart.  this was a more sympathetic view on emily, yes  ---  i didn’t want to excuse her canon behavior, and she still has flaws in this story...  but she also cares, and tries to be a good mom, in her own way.  she loves luke, and she loves his friends too.  this line sets that up wonderfully.   9 / 10

15.   if i was you (i'd wanna be me too)   ( 11000, multichapter, carrie redemption arc-ish??  ;  exploring carrie / julie relationship )

Because her dad always has impeccable timing, he picks the night Julie plays at the Orpheum to completely lose his mind.

verdict :   oooh, i love this line.  poor trevor, but also... this line slaps.  it’s just the right amount of carrie-pov bitchiness.  while this story is still very much a work in progress, but i love how it’s coming along so far  ;   it already has so many moments i love  ( ‘this band is home’!! )  and writing carrie is an exercise in characters i’m not used to writing.   excellent line, 8 / 10

16.   kill your heroes (and then kill them again)   ( 9500, vampire reggie )

Reggie gets bitten on a Monday. On Tuesday, he goes to band practice.

verdict :  EXCELLENT opening line!!  it’s short, it’s pithy, it gets right to the point, and you’re sure not going to forget it.  i love this line.  i love this story.  this really set up the story and i’m super happy with it.   10 / 10

17.   feast or famine    ( 7200, demon goose fic )

In their absolute defense, the boys do not, as they’re later accused of, murder a goose.

verdict :   ... listen.  this is the best opening line i’ve ever written.  it literally doesn’t get better than this, you can’t top this one.  the pinnacle has been reached.   i will literally never write a line, or a story, more engaging than this one.  200 / 10

18.   fall out boy knockoff   ( work in progress ;  5 times luke falls while climbing things he really shouldn’t be climbing )

The first thing Luke says when he sets foot in the garage for the first time is, “Whoa! You’re kidding me, you got a loft!”

verdict :   starting off with action  ---  another great way to toss readers right into the story!!  this is a fun line that really encapsulates luke’s sheer...  chaos gremlin energy.   this entire fic radiates chaos gremlin energy, and i can’t wait to post it.  7 / 10

19.  i can’t even hear them scream   ( work in progress ;  all the women in julie’s maternal line have the ability to see ghosts, the boys ain’t special )

Julie is eight months old when she sees her first ghost.

verdict :   straightforward!  to-the-point!!  tosses you right into the plot!!  not the most engaging...  but i like it, especially as this section of the fic is being told from rose’s point of view, so it comes from a perspective we wouldn’t otherwise get.   6 / 10

20.   remembering   ( work in progress ;  part of the ‘side effects of coming back from the dead’ series, basically an excuse to write sleepy bois )

Even after the spell is broken and Caleb’s stamps are gone, Julie can’t bear to leave the boys alone; the idea that they will vanish when out of her sight, flickering out of existence like candles dying in the rain, is too real, and too awful to endure.

verdict :   this...  might work better broken up into two sentences.  i’m probably gonna do that.  technically it works better as two lines, but as an opening sentiment, i love this??  the entire fic has a...  very slow, soft, thoughtful vibe, and i like how this line establishes that with a metaphor.   excited for this one!!  8 / 10

tagged by :   the absolute superstar that is @sunsetcurvecuddles​ tagging :    uhhhhh i don’t know a lot of writers in the fandom i don’t socialize hEL P

[miniatureclover]

Faraway Wanderers Reading Blog: Chapters 06-10

I AM BACK! Maybe I’ll be able to finish this live blog series before the live action comes out? Hopefully?

Chapter 6: The Beauty

Gu Xiang and Zhou Zishu are way too much together, ha. They also make a good team, surprisingly, even with Zhou Zishu having to bow out of the fight part way (throwing the same “poor fragile me” excuse Gu Xiang used right back at her…except he actually means it since the fool is literally dying a slow death by nails). He’s also a good teacher, and her a good student, and this really isn’t helping him lay low but ah well, I guess that flew out of the window once this whole mess started.

The fight scenes are pretty good, too. Gu Xiang is young and confident, but absolutely brutal and not afraid to use hidden weapons. She has good reflexes and instincts, though she is still young, and that’s reflected in her panic when she loses her weapon and getting overconfident. Contrast that with Zhou Zishu who is very observant and picks up some stones to help her out when he has to rest, and you can see the clear difference between them as people with two different experience levels. It’s really neat how the narrative manages to mix the characters’ life experiences, personality, and age into the way they fight without giving it away explicitly.

She blinked in astonishment — this ragged man’s ramblings worth diddlysquat, but his execution in battle was one of the cleanest and cruelest she had ever seen. It really made one wonder who he was.

Really throwing that image out the window. Guess it’s lucky he was nerfed by the nails, huh. And it turns out that our main character is also a rather brutal fighter, when he can fight without collapsing.

And here enters Wen Kexing, finally with a proper name! What an entrance. He’s already kind of a creep with no sense of personal boundaries, ha. He’s also really, really perceptive though. In a creepy way (who says “your shoulder blades are beautiful, therefore your face must also be beautiful”?? he’s such a ridiculous flirt).

Alas, we are left wondering whether Wen Kexing is really blinded by good looks or just very perceptive after Gu Xiang says that he has a tendency to exaggerate.

Chapter 7: Setting Off

Oh gosh, this poor boy. Protect him, he is precious. I’m talking about Zhang Chengling of course, who starts the chapter off crying because he has seen a lot of stuff go down, like his entire family dying to start things off, followed by people coming to kill him and a seemingly random beggar agreeing to deliver him somewhere safe? But, alas, might as well cry yourself a river while you’re at it, kid. It’s going to be a rough ride now that he’s stuck with this ragtag group.

Wen Kexing is such a clown. He has his wits about him, but he is such a clown with a punchable face. Zhou Zishu isn’t actually much better in terms of acting like a normal human being interacting with smaller human beings. At least Zhang Chengling is resilient. He bounces back quickly and continues to pester Zhou Zishu to become his teacher. He does still have nightmares, which makes sense after all he’s been through.

But he seems to remind Zhou Zishu of someone from his past, which is interesting.

Back to why Zhang Chengling is a precious bun and must be protected: after having nightmares and believing he’s woken his savior up, he says things like “I can…I can stop sleeping if it’s a problem?” That is not actually a legitimate solution to the problem, believe it or not.

Then some enemies arrive with a superpowered guqin/zither, which is hilarious no matter how many novels or dramas I encounter considering traditional guqin with silk strings aren’t very loud instruments (the description from the first sentence of the next chapter is right in that it’s more of a “thin” sound than other instruments).

Chapter 8: Moonshade

Wen Kexing is indeed an enigma, the perfect match for Zhou Zishu who is undoubtedly one himself. In between his moments of eccentricity, he provides a lot of insight to the martial arts world, the way he conveys the harshness of life in it striking a rather eerie note (Wen Kexing’s voice was gentle, “Even if he’s still alive, all of his meridians have been broken; he’s useless now. Death would be a happier fate for him.”) and slides right out of it a moment later.

This match also speaks to Zhou Zishu’s capabilities: injured, he managed to beat Qin Song who is apparently well-known for his ability to kill people with that zither, and with a crudely constructed flute at that.

He felt a particular aura from this man that suggested they might be birds of a feather, the other would definitely not do something if it didn’t benefit him. […] After lots of thoughts without any solid conclusions, he scoffed at himself — old habits died hard.

You two are indeed birds of a feather, glad you noticed. I do like how he slips back into old habits, after all, he only recently stepped away from his former life as a spymaster, it’d be difficult to put a stop to all of his old tendencies.

They even proceed to exchange a few moves, presumably to figure each other out, until the pesky nails driven into Zhou Zishu’s torso act up, which gives Wen Kexing an opportunity to be a creep and touch his face. Half of it makes sense, since he’s convinced Zhou Zishu is “a beauty” and hiding it somehow, but he seems the type to have done such a thing even without that reason.

This exchange is hilarious though:

-What’s my face made of? -Human skin. -It feels like it’s one with your body… -Well, I was born with it, so.

…I should hope so. These two are a comedy duo in their own right.

Gu Xiang continues to be a delight, in any case. She has no reserve about making smart comments as soon as Wen Kexing’s back is turned, probably knowing he can still hear her at a distance.

Finally, three days later, their little party manages to make it to Zhang Chengling’s father’s friend, but we’re only on chapter 8, which means there’s much more chaos to be had in their future. For now, Zhou Zishu is relieved he finished his self-imposed mission and gained some “merits”, but muses on how it’s exhausting to be good person, haha. Indeed, the world doesn’t make it easy sometimes, especially not the crazy martial arts world they live in.

Chapter 9: In the Woods

Name info-dump, I guarantee I will remember none of them. It does fill out the world and fits with Zhou Zishu’s character, since his job required him to know all the nitty-gritty details of the major players in the martial arts world.

Ultimately, the exposition serves to let us know why he decides stay in the manor for a bit, as he’s well aware that Zhao Jing and the rest of the people grouping up at his place aren’t as glamorous and gallant as they seem. Also, he’s already weak to Zhang Chengling’s puppy eyes, apparently.

Zhao Jing is catching onto the glaringly obvious hints at Zhou Zishu being far more than a random beggar, and his manipulation of Zhang Chengling’s eager to please nature might be a bad sign of what’s to come. Zhou Zishu is more than prepared for a little investigating into his real identity, and the deception runs deep enough that he has a whole fake history and job to go along with his name.

Zhou Zishu endures a round of social BS-ing, aka attempts to dig for information on him, which is explained in a really succinct manner: although the greetings and false praise are absolute bullshit and not genuine in the least, they do serve a purpose, which is to sort out who has relations with who, and who is an outsider to be wary of. It’s a good point. The boot-licking is a standard in the genre that emphasizes the importance of saving face and social relations. The author summed it up well.

After sitting through all that, Zhou Zishu decides he has stayed long enough and departs under the cover of night, except he can’t shake Wen Kexing off his tail, much to his annoyance.

I’ll admit, these two characters don’t draw me in quite as much as some of priest’s other protagonists, but their dialogue is a goldmine:

-“Escorting the young master Zhang is purely for gathering merits, so that I won’t have to endure any tortures in the Underworld after death. -“Correct, Brother Zhou truly shares the same mind with me; and as only beautiful people can do that, it is clear-” -“See, my dear soulmate, another chance for merit gathering has appeared.”

They continue bickering until they find a corpse in the forest, aaand this is where our plot kicks off!

Chapter 10: Netherworld

“Someone killed the Lord of Duan Jian Manor, and I’m a charitable person who wants to gather merits, so why not. And I’m bored anyway.”

Ha. And Zhou Zishu catches onto his BS right away, suggesting he might want to chase after Sun Ding because he’s the most powerful of the culprits who ran off. It’s hilarious how well-matched these two are, and how they just roll with each other’s ridiculous commentary.

Despite not wanting to get involved, Zhou Zishu can’t help it. His detective senses are tingling and he figures there’s nothing to lose since he’s a dead man walking.

However, their pursuit leads them to another dead body, and they take off after the person fleeing the crime scene until they reach a cemetery. Of course it’s a cemetery, haha. The person they were pursuing also disappears mysteriously. The whole scene is fit for a horror movie, complete with laughing animals.

Now, to be fair, and I’m not sure if this applies to owls, but some animals like foxes have truly terrifying vocalizations (one variation sounds like a screaming woman, for one). It’s no wonder people used to think demons and spirits existed. Unlike western depictions of the owl as a symbol of wisdom, among other things, in Chinese culture they’re apparently bad omens, at most used to ward off evil spirits.

Wen Kexing is so random and dramatic and loves to talk, haha. He tells a short story about owls being omens of death, then about locust trees being considered the door to the underworld. They really do find an underground cavern and river beneath the tombstone.

So! We have met our two main characters, become well-acquainted with their propensity to hide their true identities and incessant bickering when they’re together, and set the stage for solving a murder mystery. Decent progression for 10/78 chapters. I really love priest’s writing, which is always a delightful balance of pleasant and poetic description between good, distinctive dialogue and forward action to progress the story.

[yeoldontknow]

ayo bae it’s time to get lit~

what follows below is an introduction (attack) post for @igot7bangtanbaes, who has dipped her toe into the EXO water and now i would like to drown her. :3

as light of my life Kim Junmyeon once said:

LET’S GET HEATED

when EXO debuted, there originally were 12 members and they were divided into two subgroups: EXO-K and EXO-M. three members have left, so now we are left with an OT9 (but i still cherish the hell out of the past three members, they are important). eight of the members are korean and only one is chinese, so now it is time to meet your new kings. going youngest to oldest (and also because you seem hella hyped for sehun so imma start there)

Oh Sehun

the king of hearts (everyone’s heart tbh)

Name: Oh Sehun

Stage Name: Sehun

DOB: April 12, 1994

Position: (1/2) main rapper, (1/3) lead dancer, occasional vox (least we forget when he sang baek’s part in I Sing For You??)

facts as stated in the GC: maknae of the group, but also a model like he’s a prince from a different time. he often models for louis vuitton and has had spreads in vogue and marie claire, and like...he’s a king. actually, he is the lord to a small plot of land in scotland because his fans are The Most Extra and bought him goddamn Title for his birthday i cannot even. loads of people think he’s really cold and kinda stand-offish because he has the strongest resting bitch face, but he is The Biggest Softie and so Sweet. once got injured during a tour and cried, not because he couldn’t perform or that it hurt but, because he absolutely did not want to let his fans down and felt horrible. dog dad to Vivi, a white fluff made of joy. if you throw vivi replica plushies on stage at him, he will make it a point to collect them all like they are pokemon. dances like an actual rent boy and is overall, an Excellent Bias (im 90% sure this is where you will live but imma keep going to be sure).

Kim Jongin

the king of hell

Name: Kim Jongin

Stage Name: Kai

Birthday: January 14, 1994

Position: (2/3) lead dancer; rapper; vox; visual

a devil/demon here to wreck your life and smile while doing it. tbh, jongin aka nini and kai are two very different people. jongin is a soft boy. he has a silly low laugh that vibrates through his whole body and turns his mouth into a massive circle. he gets shy super easily and is always smiling. loves teddy bears, flower crowns, and fried chicken. is father to three dogs that he calls his children (no subs here just look at the smiles and cry a lot). kai on the other hand is just a torpedo of sexual tension and muscles on his abs where i didn’t know muscles could be. will smirk at you and watch with a grin as you light on fire in the aftermath. once danced so hard he destroyed his shoe. moves his hips like its a gun and you are his target. studied dance for years because that’s all he wants to do, is best friends with SHINee’s taemin. recently started acting because LOOK AT HIS FACE?? like, wow so beautiful. he is art. also super proud of how dark his skin is, which is considered v-dark culturally in korea and hopes that his children will have his skin tone, what a babe. 

DO Kyungsoo

the king of souls

Name: DO Kyungsoo

Stage Name: D.O

Birthday: January 12, 1993

Position: main vocalist

nicknamed satansoo because he takes no shit and always looks like he’d happily kill a man if it meant he could have one day of peace. very close with jongin, has a large soft spot for him (jongin may be the only person soo hasn’t actively wanted to slap). called satansoo but actually a Soft Boy; domestic AF. boy cooks (often cooks for the members), loves to read, routinely dates himself, and is very humble and kind. has a smile that can light up the earth with the force of its power. sings like an angel but is also seductive like a demon. rich chocolate vocal tones and a soft speaking voice, amazing actor. out here winning awards for his acting in recent films like boy!!

Park Chanyeol

the king of the chogidab

Name: Park Chanyeol

Stage Name: Chanyeol

Birthday: November 27, 1992

Position (under me): (2/2) main rapper; vocalist; the voice of exo; songwriter!!!; general overall talent

i will do my absolute best to keep this brief. this boy is my ult and i could wax poetic about him until the inevitable heat death of the universe. part of the beagle line with baekhyun and jongdae, cannot sit still nor control his limbs. generally is the no dance line but tries His Best and is so adorable while doing it. might not be able to dance well but does literally everything else. piano? you got it. guitar? he literally played radiohead. moog synthesizer? bought one because he could and thought it would be cool. vocals? allow me to show you his soundcloud. please live and die here. writes songs, is working his way through the athletic alphabet, raps like A Man, famously said ‘you lovin’ the size.’ once said ‘i’m yours’ on a radio station and the entire country got pregnant. overall soft boy who looks like it hurts to laugh, like it causes him physical pain to keep joy inside. amazing with kids. 

Kim Jongdae

the king of smiles

Name: Kim Jongdae

Stage Name: Chen

Birthday: May 6, 1992

Position: main vocalist

A TRUE KING OK. part of the beagle line with PCY and baekhyun. when he smiles his face is literally :} = has The Best Mouth. doesn’t think junmyeon is very funny but is simultaneously really soft for him, and will usually be among the first to praise him. is actually married to minseok - super close and have the most beautiful friendship. a literal actual ball of energy, loud as shit, and usually yelling WHY?? when he has no liquid left in his body and is sweating out his soul, he will still scream. insanely strong, stable vocals. i repeat: insanely. strong. vocals. also, coming hard for dance-line. part of EXO sub unit EXO-CBX with baekhyun and minseok. 

Byun Baekhyun

king of hoeing (idk ask @kpopfanfictrash)

Name: Byun Baekhyun

Stage Name: Baekhyun

Birthday: May 6, 1992

Position: main vocalist; also coming for the dance line

proudly gets to hold the position of tallest member of EXO-CBX. auditioned at the same time as jongdae and is know for his enthusiastic dancing. jongin once said that when he saw baek dancing it was a mess, and baek confirmed this by saing ‘it looked like mollusks dancing.’ body is double jointed and when he extends his arms it, they look like lightning bolts; thinks this might also be a disease but is ok with it. voice of literal, actual angels. looks better in smoky eye makeup than most models and is king of selfies. literally taught fans how to take a selfie. once was on instagram live and made me stare at a damn wall for 30 minutes before playing yixing’s solo album. 

Zhang Yixing

king of the entire universe

Name: Zhang Yixing

Stage Name: Lay

Birthday: October 7, 1991

Position: (3/3) lead dancer; vocalist; light of everyone’s life

even if you aren’t a soft person, you are soft for yixing. it’s one of the laws of the universe, you will always be soft for him. im going to raise an unpopular opinion and announce that i often find i prefer watching yixing dance over everyone else. when his body moves, it’s perfect into a literal art and i cry every time. the last remaining chinese member of EXO and must be protected at. all. costs. was a child actor in china before wanting to become an idol. if he could play any character in a movie, he’d like to play a dinosaur or the villain. was once told that if he wanted to improve his korean he needed to get a girlfriend. writes his own songs and plays guitar. his solo debut was the highest sales of a solo album in south korea, can you even believe. generally made of sunshine and light and love and MUST BE PROTECTED. 

Kim Junmyeon

king of money

Name: Kim Junmyeon

Stage Name: Suho

Birthday: May 22, 1991

Position: leader of EXO; vocalist

trained the longest of any member! trained for seven (7) years before making his debut with EXO, resulting in him training with most of SHINee. makes awful dad jokes and has an oddball sense of humour, but we cherish him anyway. secretly keeping abs beneath his soft tee shirts. nicknamed junmoney because he treated a lot of the members in their early days when they didn’t have money, and now they all think he’s rich. the doorman at his apartment calls him Handsome Man. messiest member but also among the most humble. always makes sure to thank everyone at awards ceremonies, refusing to leave anyone who helped them out. great at math. has a solo song called curtain that literally brought me and most of the people i know to tears within the first 90 seconds. 

Kim Minseok

king of kitties

Name: Kim Minseok

Stage Name: Xiumin

Birthday: March 26, 1990

Position: vocals; sometimes rap; moving up on the dance line

oldest member of EXO while simultaneously refusing to age. honestly, he has not aged at all. he might be a wizard. hugely popular in korea and is also holding abs of steel beneath his soft tee shirts. member of EXO subunit EXO-CBX. literally can rock any hair colour. currently getting his Ph.D and will be called Doctor Kim, i die. a general soft boy who is also a cat, but WILL WRECK YOU. boy is a pimp and will come for your ass if he detects even a moment of weakness. 

WELCOME TO THE FAMILY GIRL.