#their issues on the wrong people and saying things to the wrong people and doing things they shouldn't but anya uniquely falls out of it as

[fangirl-overload13]

I mean of course it works on children and animals.

Positive reinforcement is a much better teaching tool than aggression regardless of who or what you are trying to teach.

People just think about training dogs because of the commands and obedience rather than word association or manners.

If someone is only just learning to speak or do things for the first time, they don't know the rules of what's allowed so if all they get is aggression in return they only have a negative connection to it but no corrections to fix it.

Saying no, then immediately following it by a change in attitude plus some kind of reward either compliment or treat is a better way to connect good and bad.

Animals don't speak but can be taught words or phrases in much the same way children are learning about the world for the first time.

A dog isn't going to be practicing phonics through sesame street but they will understand let's go for a walk. Don't bark. Time to eat. Lay down.

A child may not understand everything you tell them especially about what they are doing being good or bad unless you teach them what good or bad means. If all you do is yell or growl at them they are only learning that you are angry at them not what they are doing.

When I babysat for this young family for a few years the little guy was just learning to walk and talk when I started with them, over and over if he did something bad they would say "No means No" which is a great lesson like no hitting, no screaming or throwing things, no running out the front door by yourself. But they're just words with no connection. When he'd do something that requires being told no I'd follow it with an action that matched. He learned no means stop. No throwing toys, toys get put away. No more tv it's nap time, tv turns off. One time we were staying with the mom's sister and her family and the little guy had been hitting his cousin and no matter how many times the other adults said no hitting he wouldn't listen but as soon as I told him the same thing he listened. They asked me how I did it and the only thing I could say was "He knows I mean it." I would never hurt him or anything but he would receive a punishment if he was bad and a reward if he was good. He loved when I played music and we'd dance together or I'd make him a snack and bring him treats. At one point his mom started telling him "Amanda says no" and he'd stop misbehaving immediately, again because he knows when I say no I mean stop. I wasn't even around but still my word held impact.

Meanwhile when my sister got a puppy she was very out of control and wouldn't listen to much because no one had the time to train her. I managed to get her to understand that she can't jump up and grab food or knock it out of your hand, she has to sit and wait. I would hold the food just out of reach until she'd settle down and wait for it to be placed down. Now after a few years all I have to do is say "what do you do?" When holding food or treats and she will sit and wait politely until the food is either in her dish or handed to her.

When the dogs are misbehaving my mom just yells, nothing else, so at this point the dogs just figured this is how she talks. Loud. There's no positive or negative impact because there's nothing to associate it with.

Kids learn things in a simmer way based on tone and actions so if all you ever do is yell or throw a fit without addressing what the issue is they are just going to associate aggression with you and not the specific situation.

Positive reinforcement is the best way to help them correct behavior and learn that not everything will lead to an aggressive reaction.

But again because people associate obedience with animal training they might get the wrong idea if they don't understand that it's just a teaching method.

I want to apologize to my friends and family who have children for low key treating their kids like dogs but the standard methods for training dogs are even more effective of them because they actually understand language and are better at reasoning.

Positive reinforcement is amazingly effective, like I saw my nephew poking their cat so I sternly told him no, he stopped and I immediately changed my demeanor and cheerfully told him thank you and how happy I was that he listened to me instead of staying angry at him and he got this strange “Oh…It actually does make a difference wether I’m naughty or not” and later my sister in law asked why he’s so polite around me.

That’s literally what works best on dogs. Let them know when you don’t like what they’re doing but also let them know when you’re happy with them even if that means changing your demeanor on a dime (and even if you’re still a bit mad at them for doing it in the first place).

Oh and little treats. I skipped the aunt phase and is already turning into a grandma who has candy in her pockets for the kiddos for good behavior.

[actuallybean]

Please Please Please

Dating Dean Winchester is all fun and fistfights until you’re begging him not to get arrested before breakfast. All you’re asking is please, please, please—don’t screw this up. Inspired by Please Please Please by Sabrina Carpenter *Contains lots of fluff Pairing: Dean Winchester x reader ag List: @mostlymarvelgirl Supernatural Masterlist | Main Masterlist

"You Had One Job, Winchester."

You should have known falling for Dean Winchester would feel like dancing barefoot on broken glass — thrilling, a little dangerous, and guaranteed to leave you bleeding.

But you did it anyway.

You fell hard. Fast. Stupidly.

And now, standing in front of the sheriff’s office with your arms crossed and your blood pressure sky-high, you’re wondering if that was the dumbest decision of your life.

He comes stumbling out ten minutes late, limping slightly, bruised on one cheek and grinning like he didn’t just get arrested for breaking and entering.

“Before you yell,” Dean says, hands raised in mock surrender, “it was technically unlocked.”

You blink. “Dean. You broke into a bakery.”

“There were EMFs all over the oven!”

You deadpan, “You’re aware normal people just knock and ask questions, right?”

“But it was two in the morning—”

“Exactly.”

He winces. “Okay, not my best plan.”

You march over, grab his ear, and tug. “You think?”

“OW! Babe, easy—my reputation—”

“You should be embarrassed!” you hiss. “I spent the last four hours convincing a sheriff you weren’t a delusional criminal with a pastry fetish.”

Dean tries not to laugh. “To be fair, those croissants were amazing.”

You groan. “Dean. Please. I’m begging you. Can you go one week without getting us banned from a county?”

He smiles sheepishly, slipping his arms around your waist like that’ll soften you.

Spoiler: It does. A little.

“I can’t help it,” he murmurs. “Trouble follows me.”

“No,” you correct. “You chase it down in a muscle car.”

You’re not even mad that Dean’s reckless — okay, you are, but that’s not the real issue.

It’s that you love him. Desperately. Stupidly. You love him like a prayer you say with clenched fists and held breath.

And that means every time he walks out the door, you’re not just worried he’ll get hurt.

You’re worried he’ll do something so Dean it’ll blow everything up — you, him, your sanity, your future.

Because Dean doesn’t do quiet love. He does whiskey and gunpowder, fists first and feelings later. You knew that when you fell for him.

You just didn’t expect it to hurt this good.

“Why are you mad?” Dean asks later, tossing his duffel onto the motel bed.

You stare at him. “You really don’t get it?”

“No,” he says honestly, stepping closer. “I mean—I get that I screwed up the bakery thing. But you’re not mad about that.”

You pause. “I’m scared.”

Dean stills.

You wrap your arms around yourself. “Everywhere we go, I’m just… waiting for the other shoe to drop. For you to pick the wrong fight or flirt with death and leave me standing there, looking like a girl who should’ve known better.”

Dean’s voice is quiet. “You’re not a fool.”

“I’m in love with you. The guy who can’t walk past danger without poking it. That feels pretty foolish.”

He walks to you, slowly. Gentle hands cup your cheeks. “I’m not gonna ruin this.”

“You could,” you whisper.

“I know,” he says. “But I won’t. I’ve messed up a lot of things in my life, but you’re not gonna be one of them.”

You laugh shakily. “Please, please, please don’t embarrass me.”

He leans in. “Not unless you count sexy karaoke in roadside bars. In which case—I make no promises.”

You’d like to say Dean takes your fears to heart.

And he does.

For about 48 hours.

Then he gets into a fistfight with a possessed pastor at a gas station.

“I thought he was demon-possessed!” Dean defends, icing his hand on the hotel mini-fridge.

“Yeah?” you snap. “And what gave it away? His eyes? His Latin? Or the fact that he said ‘bless you’ and you took that personally?”

Dean grins. “It was the holy water. He didn’t flinch.”

“Because he’s a pastor!”

You throw a pillow at him, which he catches with a chuckle and no small amount of pride.

“You love me,” he says smugly.

You point at him. “Yes. Unfortunately. So much it makes me stupid.”

But for all the chaos, Dean tries.

He double-checks motel locks now. He leaves cheesy notes in your duffel. He lets you drive the Impala (once — you cried).

He listens when you need to vent. He softens when you break.

And one night, after a particularly rough hunt, he takes your hand and blurts, “I don’t want to lose you.”

You blink. “What?”

“I’ve screwed up so many things. I’ve lost people I didn’t think I could live without. But you—if I lose you—God, sweetheart, I won’t come back from that.”

Tears well in your eyes. “Then please don’t make me watch you destroy yourself.”

He leans his forehead against yours. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“I promise. I’ll be better. For you. For us.”

And for once, you believe him.

Of course, two days later, he dives headfirst into a vampire nest without backup.

But he comes back with all his limbs, a bouquet of gas station daisies, and a hand-written card that says:

Sorry I made you almost throw up from anxiety. I love you more than pie. Please don’t kill me. P.S. I killed the vamps. You’re welcome. – Dean “Please Please Please” Winchester

You roll your eyes.

And kiss him breathless anyway.

[finally-im-home]

Akin and his Disorganized Attachment Style with Jin

(No spoilers from ep9)

If you don't know what a disorganized attachment style is, it is one of the four attachment styles (Secure, Anxious, Avoidant, and Disorganized), often stems from childhood experiences resulting in inconsistent and unpredictable behaviours in relationships.

People with this style of attachment often find it difficult to trust people, have mixed feelings, and have negative views of others and themselves. They seek closeness and then withdraw to avoid getting hurt.

Akin, the most huggable (or sexiest) man and the winner of so many Best Actor awards comes across as cold and detached at first. But then we see how caring and considerate he is of the people around him (arranges food for the whole crew, helps a newbie with his acting, and even deals kindly with his stalker). He is emotional (the hundred times he cried) and most importantly he is a perfectionist. Even though that helps him in his acting career, he tends to bring the same in his relationship with Jin which worsens their already existing issues. Perfectionists need a certain amount of control over whatever they do and when they cannot have that, they either procrastinate the task or abandon it completely.

Akin suggests breakups whenever he feels like he's at fault because he fails to control the situation.

-> He starts freezing Jin out when he doesn't win the Sexiest Man award and feels even worse about feeling the loss. The breakdown that day was not from jealousy. No- when he couldn't maintain the perfect Actor/Celebrity status he’s expected and worked to be, he broke down. To stop projecting that bitterness onto Jin he acts cold.

-> He wants to break up when Johnny happens and he believes he was at fault. He lost control and there's nothing he can do/be to Jin to make it any better or perfect as before. During ep7 when Jin confesses his love, Akin’s instant response is, “That's why want to break up with you “. Meaning- ‘I did something wrong, I can't be perfect for you so let's end this’.

But he doesn't bring breakup during the whole stalker headache. He knows he's not completely at fault (he says the same thing in ep8) and knows there’s something they could do to control the issue.

-> He wants to break up again (not spoiling for those who didn't watch ep9, but you're going to see a lot of Akin’s need for control there). He's losing control, he cannot ensure the perfect love life for Jin if things continue this way.

But what does Jin want?

Jin only wants Akin. He wants to be there, good or bad. He doesn't care for awards or titles. He’d praise his boyfriend openly, even when he's the winner, consequences and ego be damned, and wants to share every happiness with him.

-> He throws himself out of the car immediately when Akin storms out in distress in ep5. He doesn't hesitate a second to run behind his man, lets Akin cry and gather his thoughts by himself and then kisses him to apologize for not understanding him.

-> Even though he leaves Akin alone in the parking lot after the Johnny thing, he goes to watch Akin’s play, when he himself said he wouldn't chase Akin anymore. He's not ready to abandon their relationship and goes to investigate the truth of it. Again there's no hesitancy in Jin to apologize for leaving Akin alone and not be with him that day.

Now Jin is not perfect, none of us are, but he is perfect for Akin’s disorganized attachment style.

Often people with this type of attachment are the first to initiate breakup as a means to control the situation. But do they really want a breakup in the first place? No. Underneath all the pain, and fear of abandonment they need someone to fight for them and be with them even when they are not perfect.

(None of the GIFs and images are mine. All credit to the creators)

[bernardsbendystraws]

I’m addressing things once and that’s it because there’s truthfully no reason for any hate or drama to continue.

No, I am not homophobic. I’m quite literally apart of the community myself. I don’t even know what I’ve ever done to be portrayed as homophobic.

No, I am not racist. I don’t give a fuck what you look like as long as you bring good energy and vibes. I rarely get specific with any physical traits in my writing, but when I do, I write the things I know how to write. I’ve never had naturally curly hair. I don’t write poc/black!reader since I don’t believe I should be getting the recognition for that when I promote black writers like @leoslaboratory and @muwapsturniolo.

No, I am not ableist. I’ve never used that slur in a derogatory way or done anything that would be put under this category. The only time I’ve said the word is when I repeated it and asked what it was in elementary school. I had been called it before and all I knew is it really hurt my feelings so I’d never wanna say it to someone else.

No, I am not a pedophile. I do write smut and minors do read it, but to say that is unfair when so many other creators could say the same. I don’t control what people read. I’m not their parent/guardian. I’ve always made remarks about Matt and whatnot, but I’ve never talked to a minor sexually about themselves ever. We’re all here for the same reason. I do sometimes forget people’s ages since I try to interact with everyone and some people don’t have their age posted on their blog, but I try my best.

Hate accounts are hurtful and unnecessary. The uproar in them being made for multiple people and things after this whole situation is weird and disgusting.

Now can we pls move tf on 😭 I called out hurtful behavior when we got a meme as an “apology” for using a slur as a joke. I wasn’t the only one too either. People speak up when they see something genuinely wrong. One of the GC members has had an issue with these things I’ve mentioned and two other anonymous accounts. Only people defending me have addressed these situations other than that and I think that says enough so let’s all get back to being simps fr.

[utilitycaster]

Thought i was over it but i saw a post today that reminded me of how awful the villians of c3 were for whatever Matt tried to do. Anyway what are your thoughts on Ludinus staying a m9 problem and c3 should have had a villian from the continent?

Hi anon,

I think that it's fine that Ludinus was the Big Bad for Campaign 3, and I think the issues with the campaign being set on Marquet are not with him being the villain (honestly, Ludinus using his position of power in the Dwendalian Empire to seize control of an archaeological site in Marquet could have been an interesting avenue of exploration). Again, this was always intended to be a campaign of all parties coming together and setup from previous campaigns culminating.

Perhaps the larger issue is that the villain who was deeply of Marquet and heavily influenced by recent wars on the continent, Otohan, had about as much personality as hot dog water. This oversight was only made worse by the party and narrative doing absolutely nothing to explore the Apex War that shaped her (and presumably would have given her some motivations other than "Stabbity Stab; Ruidusborn").

Ultimately, though, the flaws of Campaign 3 are not any specific story element. They are the following two things and two things alone, both of which feed off each other in a vicious cycle.

Bells Hells did not know much about anything and did not particularly work to remedy this fact, and when faced with a plot for which the players were grossly unprepared, endlessly spun their wheels in pointless debates rather than making decisions or taking action.

Matt had a very specific plot in mind with very specific beats to hit and when the characters consistently failed to hit them, sort of didn't do anything to properly course correct and give the party clear guidance.

As a result we ended up with indecisive and incurious characters begging the world to give them any sort of answer instead of making any sort of interesting choices or bold move because they were so terrified to be wrong or bad that they ended up being something worse for fictional characters: dull and annoying; and a DM who either didn't see their listless flailing and throw them a rope, or who threw them multiple ropes with no guidance leading to a Buridan's Ass situation. Analysis paralysis in individual D&D characters can be interesting (Keyleth) but unexamined analysis paralysis in an entire party is a worse trait than being murderhobos, who might at least be fun to watch, and so, there we are.

Anyone blaming specific plot elements and not "the party was a bunch of people who didn't know shit about dick and no one was willing to seize the reins and say We're Going Here, and Matt didn't intervene" has a weird axe to grind. It's characters poorly suited for the story and DMing that didn't help shape them into something better suited. That's it. The Mighty Nein would have been a better party for this plot (assuming a similar first 10-20 episodes as C2 had, anyway) in that they were motivated people who made their own choices, but Vox Machina, with no ties to Ludinus whatsoever, would also have been better for the same reason. The Bad Kids from Fantasy High would have been better. Your average suburban book club who has one member who is really on top of picking books and emailing people would have been better. It's not that Ludinus was the wrong villain; it's that Bells Hells was an exceptionally and uniquely bad party for this story.

(I do think Ludinus's ending is dumb, but most of the flaws he had during the campaign can be chalked up to "a better party wouldn't have let him talk so much and he wouldn't have worn out his welcome so hard.")

[littlelilacegg]

Felassan: What His Death Does--or Doesn't--Change About Solas's Characterization

(also: Punitive vs. Restorative Justice, Doylist vs. Watsonian analysis, and what we've misinterpreted about that revenant in the Crossroads)

Spoilers for Inquisition & Veilguard. (Minor spoilers for The Masked Empire, but only if you haven't played Veilguard.)

First, real-life context: That last page of the Masked Empire, when we actually see Solas kill Felassan, was written well before Inquisition was finished. (The book released earlier than Inquisition did, and there's a long time between the initial writing of a book and its release.) Apparently at the time, they were working with an entirely different version of Solas as a character, even with an entirely different VA in mind. THAT version of Solas was more ruthless (and a bit more of a generic Bad Guy) than the Solas we get in Inquisition and Veilguard.

The first issue at hand is of punitive vs. restorative justice. Punitive justice is the philosophy of prioritizing punishing the party responsible for a problem, whereas restorative justice prioritizes fixing the problem itself; restoring whatever was lost, taken, etc. The conflict between these two philosophies is a massive part of who Solas is.

So, my first assertion: The Solas we're familiar with in Inquisition & Veilguard heavily favors restorative justice. It's his whole thing-- "I have to fix what is broken."

Don't get me wrong, he definitely wanted to punish the Evanuris for everything they did; just listen to him talk about how an eternity of torment is "the only fitting punishment" for killing Mythal. (Side note, do not get me started on Mythal.) But even so, he didn't prioritize making the Evanuris suffer over actually ending their reign of terror. In short: If he'd just wanted vengeance, he didn't have to spend so long systematically freeing the entirety of the elven people to do it.

That focus on restorative justice is what makes him such an interesting antagonist, rather than a generic Big Bad. He doesn't just do evil shit for the hell of it. Anything bad he does, he does for the same reasons WE do. Specifically, only if:

The bad thing is necessary; it fills a functional, logistical need.

The purpose it serves is either unavoidable (like self-defense), or to help people.

This is especially true for something as big as taking a life. In Inquisition, he even has a whole conversation about how he hates having to kill random bandits (that attacked him and the party first, mind you), because they're people-- people with lives, families, dreams. He says that a person should feel bad about having to kill them, even though it's in self-defense. (And yes, he's speaking honestly, here; he has no reason not to.)

But killing Felassan? That was punitive. It served no purpose. He didn't need to kill him to take the Eluvians, Felassan just wasn't going to help him do it. It was cold-blooded punishment, plain and simple.

Which leads to my second assertion: Killing Felassan completely skews Solas's established sense of morality. This makes it feel--to me, at least--wildly out of character.

Now, I do NOT throw that phrase around lightly. In fact, I'm only comfortable using it because of the context I started this post with: Solas was literally a different character at the time that it was written. But this event exists in the canon, now, so if we want to examine Solas, we do have to take it into account: The man who expressed so much remorse over killing bandits in self-defense... also killed his own best friend in cold blood.

This leaves us with a question: How much do we take it into account?

When you simplify it, obviously, there are two options:

Disregard it as being OOC, written for a different version of him entirely, and not indicative of the character they presented in Inquisition and Veilguard. (This is called Doylist analysis: analysis that takes into account the real world, and its impact on both the story and its author.)

Take it at face value: Canon is canon, after all, and what would disregarding it be if not editorializing? (Watsonian analysis: Completely in-universe reasoning.)

Personally, when faced with that choice, I look to the revenant The Betrayal of Felassan (nice potential double meaning there, as people have pointed out) in the Crossroads.

Something to note about that revenant, first, because I've seen a lot of people misinterpreting it: Its voice may be Felassan's, but it was not created by any remnant of Felassan. It's not the spirit/echo/embodiment/etc of Felassan's anger, for example. As the Caretaker tells us, it and the other revenants were manifested from more of Solas's regrets. (They're hostile because those manifestations were then harnessed and manipulated into being so by the Evanuris, in the hopes of slowing us down.)

This revenant says four phrases:

The first, "His back, turned," is a reference to Felassan's death in The Masked Empire. It's describing Felassan, who'd had his back to Solas in that scene-- and, very notably, never turned to face him. (If you want more proof that the revenant isn't an echo of Felassan himself, there you have it: he wouldn't exactly refer to himself in third person.)

The second phrase, we'll get to in a minute.

The last two, "For freedom" (third) and "For the wolf" (fourth), are both rallying cries that Felassan used in the flashbacks we saw. First, we have "For freedom"-- what the rebellion had always been for, what it was always supposed to be for. And then, we have "For the wolf"-- what it ended up turning into. (Or at least, what Solas's regret makes him fear it may have turned into.) This is when it's important to keep in mind that this is Solas's own regret, speaking to him in Felassan's voice; he's hearing his friend, whom he betrayed, both mockingly expressing support for him and at the same time, accusing him of becoming the very thing he feared. (Somebody get this elf in therapy.)

Back to the second phrase, because this is the one I think is the most applicable when it comes to how we look at the specific circumstances of Solas's murder of Felassan: "A story, unfinished."

Do I think that this is entirely literal, meant purely as the devs breaking the fourth wall to speak one-to-one with the players? No, of course not. But beyond the general association of death with "ending a story," there's really not much reason to include this line, or to word it in that specific way. So... while I do think it's meant to be behind the guise of that general association--Solas expressing regret for Felassan's life being cut short--I do also think it was meant as a nod to the players, too.

Honestly, a common theme with Felassan and his inclusion in the DA story as a whole is the interference of real-life logistics with storytelling: His death, as we've mentioned, was written as the now-ooc backstory of a then-incomplete character. Solas's regret over it wasn't a mural in the Lighthouse, not necessarily because it wasn't important enough to Solas to be one-- but because regardless of its importance, it didn't follow the storyline of him and Mythal, and would feel wildly out of place to the players if it was included.

Full-on personal opinion time: As you can probably tell, I tend to lean more towards Doylist analysis when it comes to Felassan-- real-life stuff just got in the way. It happens! Life impacts art! And in this case, it made him into the one thing (besides the Big Varric Twist, which would be its own damn post lol) that completely skews Solas's morals if you look at it too hard.

Now, if you care about fic, I'm gonna talk about the one I'm writing in a second, since it addresses some of these things. Otherwise... see you, I guess! I look forward to hearing people's thoughts!

P.S. If you want a great post about Mythal, I'd check out this one by @evanhereonearth :

------------------------

Fic stuff:

Okay. So, I'm writing a fix-it fic that covers the entirety of both Inquisition and Veilguard. It's, uh... looking like it's gonna be novel-length, from my current drafts. Don't get me wrong, it's not nearly enough to count as an actual novelization! (There's no damn way I'm writing that much combat, for one thing.) But it does hit all the major plot points of both games.

My goal for it wasn't really to "fix" the canon so much as just... supplement it, I guess? The reason this is relevant is that I came up with in-universe ways to recontextualize things like Felassan's death. Also, I found a logistical workaround for the ending of Veilguard to make it fit the theme of restorative justice more! (And if I can be proud of myself for a sec, it's not only straightforward and logistically viable, but still actually narratively satisfying.)

The Inquisition section has an intense, funny Inquisitor Lavellan-- the embodiment of the exhaust-every-dialogue-tree, read-every-book player, who also has a mystery to solve about her missing memories and a forgotten person she was supposed to find. And the Veilguard part has a Rook that's secretly a spirit of compassion, who got dropped into a de Riva's life by mistake-- and now has to replace the real one, who's dead. Also, the Inquisitor gets to stick around a bit in Veilguard (more or less like a companion).

It's not done yet, and since the manuscript habit is hard to break, I'm not gonna start posting it until all the drafts are actually done. But it's the ONLY thing I'm ever gonna post on my ao3, so if you wanna be updated when it goes up, here's the link to bookmark:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/64917091

[ahappydnp]

Hey so I hope this is okay to ask as i’m a bit confused and crazy atm. In the WIQYT screenshots going around again about the doc, the last one talks about Dan having self image issues. I was curious if you could possibly help spread some light on the subject maybe? I remember always seeing him posted on the proana blogs back in the day frequently, and even in Dan and Depression he says his lexapro made him “gain loads of weight” but it never seemed like anything visually changed. I know you’re not a mind reader and trying to understand another persons self image is impossible, I guess I just maybe don’t understand where this comes from. I know he used to rag on himself in videos by putting pillows down his shirt to signify that he was chubby as a kid even tho he never was from the pictures available. I’m aware this is very parasocial but I’ve been going through a lot self image wise and he never got to make his documentary where he talks about it and idk. To me, Daniel is lowkey a philosopher and i’m so desperate to hear what he has to say on the subject. Can you think of any times he’s talked about this kind of stuff? (Sorry for this being such a downer anon i just kinda feel like i need to hear about it rn and i don’t know where to look)

I hope your weekend is amazing and filled with joy and laughter!

like you said, no one knows what goes on inside someones mind especially things like insecurities. but i do think it's two seperate issues that dan has talked about (under the cut for sensitive topics)

i think it's important to remember how society treated weight in the early 00s, obviously it was muuuuch worse for women but boys would also get ridiculed for their weight regardless of their size. i assume that dan did get picked on for being bigger (more than likely he was probably just taller than his classmates but kids just really like generalizing words like "fat" and that sticks in your brain). it was such a shitty time for body acceptance as a whole and he was bullied so much i'm sure people did throw in weight comments just to add to the blow.

and like everything else that's going to stick and then when you're a little older you just repeat this truth that other people told you that "i was a fat kid and fat=bad just like gay=bad so i'm going to agree with them" of course that was suuuuuuper toxic and unhealthy and dan definitely did even more damage peddling casual fatphobia and making insensitive jokes online. but he was pretty openly struggling with his body image from the get go (all the ED comments he made in 2009) and as we know, there's generally another root cause. dan's talked about his self hatred when he was younger (particularly stemming from the bullying and his internalized homophobia) at length and it makes sense that manifested into body dysmorphia the second part is in that screenshot from WIQY he was specifically talking about gay men's beauty standards which is a whole different issue altogether. he's talked a lot about his baby face and how he's felt insecure about his lack of "masculine" features and build. he's talked about how people don't take him seriously because he doesn't look like "a man". there's also the added layer of him being the poster child for ~pretty boy twink~ who's now getting older and aging out of those very rigid beauty standards solely because he's no longer 21. but gay men can be incredibly toxic when it comes to labels and what's attractive (i mean think about the fact that grindr literally has a body type filter so you can exclude whole subsets of people). so he's not saying that he's not attractive or not the general beauty standard, it's that he came out and fell face first into gay standards discourse because he was actively engaging and consuming queer community in a new light

allll of this to say i COMPLETELY get how it can instinctively rub people the wrong way when dan howell, who was famously coined "the hot one" for years and has had people drooling over him his entire adult life, says he's insecure. it can feel like a slap in the face if you don't consider his own struggles but i do think he's self aware and healed enough to know that he's very much within societal beauty standards (tall, straight sized, white, eurocentric features) and has actually benefited greatly in his career because of his looks. and he's unpacked a lot of his fatphobia and has made a point to be vocally body positive even going back to like 2016/2017

[velvetvexations]

Not to be That Guy™ or whatever, but I think the discourse around "dude" and whether it's gender neutral or not is... Really stupid, frankly.

Like. Obviously, if someone doesn't want to be called dude, don't call them that. But I don't think there's any reason to get your (general you, not you specifically) panties in a twist over someone using "dude" in a general post that isn't about a specific individual.

And like... Tbh a LOT of the people who get up in arms about it (especially TRFs, though it's not limited to them), love to use "girl"/"sis"/etc as if it's gender neutral slang too. Hell, I've literally seen people say - and I quote - "girl (gender neutral)"

Like.... Don't get me wrong, I've also done this a few times and I don't necessarily have a problem with EVERY instance of it, but I think it's disingenuous to complain about "dude" if you're just going to turn around and do the same thing with "girl."

I think these people need to be consistent with their beliefs or just shut up, honestly. Like. How do you expect people to respect your discomfort over a gendered word if you won't even do that for others? Either get over your issues with "dude" or stop using "girl/sis/etc" in the same way. You can't have both. "Rules for thee, but not for me" ass take to have.

yeah I think it's best to get rid of casual unthinking gendered language but if someone makes a big dramatic hissy fit about dude and then calls men baby girl they should fuck off

[quirkwizard]

The HPSC is the real heroes of BNHA. Their methods are completely justified no matter how bad they're because they want to remove anything that threatens the stability Hero Society. If they took LoV with far more seriousness and eliminated them early on, the LoV wouldn't be a threat, Shigaraki will surely die and the Vanguard Action Squad will never form or even follow his fate if they already joined his ragtag group of purely dysfunctional misfits that is pure evil in the HPSC's eyes.

The LoV shall never deserve to speak out against Hero Society because they're worse than Hero Society itself. They also deserve to get assassinated by the HPSC for their unforgivable crimes and they shall not deserve to be born.

Jeez, man. Did the League of Villains kick your dog or something?

This is such an insane take to have. Look, I am one of the first people to say that people downplay how bad the League is and how they are not good people. However, this extreme is not any better. There is the fact that the Hero Commission isn't anywhere near as bloodthirsty as you seem to think it is. It seemed more prevalent with Lady Nagant, but far more reserved with Hawks. They only gave him a kill order on Double, who was an apocalyptic threat to the heroes. That seems pretty telling as far as their stance on killing goes. More importantly, Hawks killing Double is seen as a bad thing, but in and out of universe. You could argue pragmatics as much as you want and in universe justifications, but it goes against what the story is saying. The story makes it pretty clear that killing the villains isn't the answer. That the Hero Commission's actions are bad. Because the whole point about the society as it was was that it was not perfect. It was an illusion of a great society that was propped up by several fragile pillars. The Hero Commission and their killings are part of that. If you need to kill people to keep the illusion of a safe and happy society, that's a pretty huge flaw with that society.

The whole point is that the heroes need to understand the villains and at least make an attempt. And this isn't to excuse the League either. Again, these are terrible people who have done a tremendous amount of harm to Japan. The manga does nothing to excuse what they do. What they do is try and explain why they are doing it. The point of the villains is that they have been hurt by flaws of the post-Quirk society. They have a right to be mad. However, their injustice does not justify or excuse the actions taken against the world at large. Because all they are doing is hurting other people. What they are doing helps no one, least of all themselves. And the heroes have to stop them, they have to try and help them. Because villains are still people with their own problems. Once you understand those issues, you can prevent them further down the line. It's about treating problems in society as people and not as black marks you need to rub out. What I'm saying is that people "the villains did nothing wrong" and "the villains deserve to be put down like mad dogs" are both wrong.

[mydollsaregay]

ok. thoughts on the ag historical re-releases! i'll make a separate post for the new items, this got pretty long.

lack of josefina

firstly. poor josefina. it looks like she got dropped from the historical rereleases T_T

i understand why; her birthday outfit obviously sold worse than the others, as it's still in stock on the website. while I think it's a shame, obviously (both from a representation and a "hey that's my friend josefina, don't exclude her :(" point of view), i think she actually is suffering from past success, poor dear. i, for one, had already found a secondhand version of josie's bday outfit, while i was missing the other two from the first drop, and so i had no incentive to buy it. i don't think i'm alone in that; from my childhood recollections at least, i remember josefina being far more popular than addy and even kirsten (though that was likely due to her retirement).

it'll be interesting to see how that all shakes out with sam, given how the secondhand market is absolutely saturated with her outfits. i do think she might have the best breakthrough appeal to people who aren't collectors and are just shopping for their kids so. we'll see.

ultimately, i think it's a real shame josefina got dropped (at least for this release). i think she got the short end of the stick in that her birthday outfit was far from her rarest/most sought after one. i think that if they had started with another outfit, such as her summer one, she would have done numbers and been able to stay in the lineup :(

the sam of it all

listen. i love sam. she's an absolute icon. but i have some issues with her inclusion. firstly, her shoes are wrong lol. i know like. "back in the day" most sams would have been wearing the birthday outfit with their meet shoes, but the illustrations clearly show adorable little white mary janes with white bows. this is your opportunity to make this a reality, ag. come on. we all have black mary janes at this point. at least pair the outfit with her white party slippers (which they used to sometimes advertise the outfit with), if you don't wanna make something new. they've invented new shoes for rereleases before, i believe.

like. come on man.

anyway, pettiness aside, i'm going to be really interested to see how fast sam's outfit sells out. I mentioned above that i think it may be picked up for kids as well as collectors, but idk if that'll be enough to make up the gap for the many collectors that absolutely already own it lol. personally, i won't be picking it up, as i recently found the base dress, and am certain i could make the other pieces to my satisfaction even if i can't also find them for a good price.

personally, i wish they brought in another girl who had harder to find pieces, or at least gave josefina one more chance at a rerelease - i know her school outfit tends to be a bit tricky to catch for a good price, so maybe that would go better? that said, it's one of her plainer outfits, so idk. honestly, the outfits i want most of josefina's are her random one-off outfits anyway; they're hard to find, while being cute as a button.

alternately, if they would bring back the accessory sets that match each outfit, i would be satisfied with sam being in the lineup. it's really hard to find small accessories secondhand for a good price, as things are always getting lost, even for a popular character like sam!

kirsten

not much to say here. she looks cute! i won't be getting the set, as i found her school dress secondhand a while back, and i can absolutely improvise with the shawl and hair ribbons. the boots are a bit trickier, but for that price? i'll figure something out.

i actually just took a second look, and it seems like the outfit is using the same boots as her birthday rerelease. i think it's a bit silly, but i know those boots have been hard to find secondhand for ages, so having some extra copies out there isn't the worst (unlike the mary janes situation lol). it looks like she's wearing her meet boots in the illustrations, but i'm fine with ag assuming folks already own those.

addy

*insert my longest yeah boy ever video here*

for real though, i am incredibly excited. this is one of those outfits that is BEAUTIFUL, while being pretty tricky to find complete. the pin is especially elusive due to its size, but the actual clothing itself has a nasty habit of getting eaten by moths because it was made of 100% wool lol. i love the dedication to detail, but most people don't moth-proof doll storage, and so many of these have been lost to the moth wars.

the rerelease is a wool blend, which will likely protect it a bit more. as much as i love using natural fibers and not introducing more plastic to the world, i would like this set to last, so i'm selfishly pleased. i've been pleasantly surprised with ag's "mock wool" fabrics in the past, so i would expect the fabric to feel about right and lay correctly.

this outfit is one that has an available pattern, but it looks a bit beyond my level, so i'll definitely be picking it up from ag. I skipped kirtsen's birthday outfit last time because there is a pattern and it looked quite easy to make, but this one just looks a bit too fiddly for me to attempt. plus i love the little pin!

last point: the shoes. they look like her meet boots. this doesn't bother me, however. it's closer to the situation with kirsten than the one with sam. those meet boots are pretty hard to find secondhand (lots of folks have just her meet dress but not the socks or boots), so more copies hurts no one, and addy actually wears them in the illustrations. i'm fine with it.

money money money

time to get down to brass tacks. $55 dollars is really expensive, so if you're interested in these releases, you gotta make sure it's REALLY worth it to you. despite having none of these sets complete, i'm only getting one of them, and that's the ultimate reason why.

that said - i don't... totally hate the price point? i got addy's birthday outfit from the last drop, and the quality was absolutely there: there was none of the modern ag quality control issues i had feared. i really appreciate that piece of mind (please feel free to roast me for this part if this release ends up having issues lol). i have two major issues with the way these releases work, however.

the first, is that the books are bundled with the outfit. i'm sorry, but that is silly. i don't need another copy of the book, man, i already have one. it feels like a waste. i also know it allows them to artificially increase the price, which i'm sort of on the fence about, however. because ag has the book bundled in there, some of the outfits can be more complex while remaining at the same price point. you can definitely see that when looking at the last drop and comparing addy's birthday outfit to kirsten's; there's no way those items cost the same to produce, but i bet the added book gave them some wiggle room. the biggest issue i actually have with the books is that they're not selling them separately. what if a kid wants to read it, man?? what if someone DOESN'T have a copy, but they have the outfit? it just bothers me.

my second major issue is the FOMO of it all. i just really don't like how they are set up as limited edition. i know its a common marketing strategy, but it just irks me, personally. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

overall

i'm hyped. the negatives don't dampen that at all, i'm not gonna lie. i'm super excited to finally get my hands on addy's school outfit, and i'm really glad ag finally decided to continue the rereleases.

i hope in the future that ag will give josefina another chance to shine, and that they will continue to due more re-releases. i also hope to see the other historical girls someday! (frankly i think it's a bit silly they haven't tried to capitalize on the whole bridgerton media empire by rereleasing caroline's traveling set and other such outfits, but i digress.)

[a-minke-whales-tale]

Echoes of a Twisted Form

I have noticed over time, there are many things within my body that seem simply very odd in how they are not quite human, or certainly not a normal human. Had it been a few I think it would be quite easy to overlook, but there are so many oddities.

I need the canes to walk when out of the water and I do actually have a number of struggles with balance and motor skills and being able to precisely control my hands

I needed a mechanical valve to be implanted into my stomach and my stomach does appear partially paralyzed

My hearing has a number of issues. I am hard of hearing and in a way that makes it extremely difficult to have audio conversations for me - I struggle to use a telefone and my companion and I are looking into taking signing courses so we can communicate, but at other points I can be quite sensitive to certain sounds and there are certain sounds which are quite painful

My vision is distorted and staticy like watching an old video recording and there are these shapes and spots that form in and out of reality that make it extremely difficult to read, difficult to track objects and effectively focus on them

There seems to be something off with my colour vision as I keep being told that I have percieved the colour wrong and asked if I am colourblind so many times but I am able to continually pass the various tests

My sense of smell is pretty limited generally but then others are very overwhelming

My sense of taste seems incorrect. There are many things to me that are horrendously bitter including sweet peppers, certain sugar snacks, and vanilla ice cream, and other foods that are decidedly sweet to me that people say are not, in particular fish

My skin has sensitivity to certain textures which can be difficult and it gets irritated easily with heat like hot water

I overheat easily when out of the water

I am periodically unable to speak (which is another reason to learn signing) though this is not as common or severe as it used to be

I have certain synesthesias that show up at different points mostly relating to colour and feelings (physical not emotional)

I am extremely skilled in my field, though I struggle to collect and organise my thoughts outside of that field and I struggle with various executive tasks and even taking care of myself

I have pretty severe memory problems and very little personal memory, however my memory in terms of being able to recall data or perform skills is intact and this is very confusing for humans

I have an accessory spleen. It is pretty rare for humans to have them but quite common for cetaceans to have them

I have one less thoracic vertebrae than normal humans, two of them are fused into one slightly larger vertebra. What is curious, minke whales have 11 dorsal (the equivalent spot to thoracic) vertebrae, humans have 12. I have 11.

There are honestly a whole bunch of other things as well but some it is hard to know if this is just some odd effect of my body and whatever they did when I was designed or if it is an effect afterwards either from my pills or the various training and path I was sent down.

I know not every body is entirely normal and that human bodies are a pretty wide spectrum. If it were just a few things I think it would be pretty easy to write off, but so many things being odd, combined with the nightmares, the voices of the humans who made me, the transformations - I do really have to ask, how many coincidences, how many oddities can there be before it is a pattern, before it is evidence that something really did happen to me and my being taken from the sea and twisted into this terrible shape is not all the delusions of a lunatic?

[lies-unfurl]

On Thunderbolts*

I honestly don't know how to rate this. I feel like if I was a casual fan, it would be a solid 8/10, but obviously I'm not that. It was a tight story that cohered well and had some strong character dynamics. It also had issues, particularly with regards to how it related to the larger MCU, that I have a lot of thoughts on.

What I liked:

Yelena. Just in general.

More specifically, the way Yelena's depression was portrayed resonated with me a lot, mostly in ways that I don't feel like discussing in a movie review on tumblr dot com.

I honestly don't know how anyone could watch this and come away thinking John did nothing wrong, lol. Props to Wyatt Russell for playing him so unlikable.

I generally enjoyed the character dynamics. The scene in the back of the truck where Yelena and Ava were making fun of John's guns worked really well.

Overall, besides literally the last minute before the credits, the story felt like it was put together well. The pacing worked and events flowed in a way that made sense.

I liked Val as a villain, though I wish we'd get more of her motivations.

The scenes inside the Void were really cool. The second one with Yelena and her younger self was one of my favorites in the whole movie.

I obviously want Bucky to survive Doomsday, but if he goes out, at least he's got a banging costume and hairstyle for it.

What I want to be a hater about:

I have mixed feelings on Bucky's role in this. I think it makes sense for him to be in a more stable place than the rest of the group. My overall issue is that we're given no info whatsoever on how he went from TFATWS to where he is now. With Yelena, I can easily see how her character moves from Hawkeye, where we saw her last, to now. Ava, idk, sure, it's not explained how she ended up working for Val, but I can see how Val would take advantage of someone who has her abilities and probably not a lot of other job prospects. But Bucky? There's just nothing to foreshadow him going into politics in TFATWS. If the end of TFATWS sets up anything, it's him and Sam working together in the future. So how did we get here? Like, I do genuinely think it's kind of funny that the MCU didn't even try to explain things, but it's also bad writing. And yeah, I do wish we'd gotten more of Bucky. idk. It's an ensemble film, but they could have inserted a Void sequence for him without fucking up the flow too bad. Also, he just looks so unhappy for most of the movie, and I want to know why! Just the circumstances? The fact that he really hates politics? SebStan not enjoying himself? idk.

The pacing worked; the timeline didn't. How the fuck did Alexei get from NYC to Utah overnight in that limo. (Bucky maybe flew himself and his motorcycle in, but Alexei obviously didn't.)

I don't like Alexei in general. I feel like the movie missed a chance to reckon with his responsibility for what the Widows went through by just treating him as either comic relief or a supportive father for Yelena.

It was also a little weird that no one mentioned Melina?

I'm ambivalent about Taskmaster's death. I'm not that mad about it, but part of me feels like it was done mainly to appease the fanboys angry about her not being Tony Masters.

Bob was fine? idk, I didn't feel too strongly about him one way or another. I see some people in the tags blorbofying him, which isn't surprising, but... I just keep thinking about how he was supposed to be played by Steven Yeun. And I know Sentry was white in the comics, but sorry, it's a little weird to me that they replaced an Asian-American actor with a white guy. Val's whole thing with dyeing his hair blond would've hit much differently.

We should've gotten a Sam mention before the post-credits scene. It makes no sense for Val to say there are no superheroes around when Sam has been Captain America for years at this point, and he's been working for the government! When you pair that line with the implications of the hair dye, with apparently no one remembering that there are existing heroes who work for the government, it's... telling. And that's something that could've been brought to the forefront more by just having someone remember that Sam Wilson is Captain America.

I already wrote my thoughts on the post-credit scene, and they haven't really changed upon seeing the movie. That said, I do feel like the ending undermines the movie somewhat by falling into the same old trap where every MCU movie is an advertisement for the next movie. It just like... doesn't work? for Yelena to have the "We own you" line, and then the end credits and the PCS all confirm that actually, no one respects the New Avengers, so like... what's the point of them working with/for Val. And this will probably get expanded on somewhat in Doomsday and/or Secret Wars, but the casts for those movies are so bloated, I'm not sure how much consideration that element will get.

So, yeah. I don't know. I think it was a good movie on a technical level, but as a (reluctant) MCU fan, I don't know how much I enjoyed it. I feel like I can't form a full opinion because it ultimately doesn't feel like a movie that stands on its own; it's going to depend on how upcoming movies contextualize it.

[boopiemadz]

drug dealer travis and customer natalie

TravNat – No Crash AU Headcanons

Travis dealer X Nat customer

Travis and Natalie first really talk because they’re in the same group for a dumb health class project.

Neither of them says much. He shrugs through every question. She makes a sarcastic comment about addiction stats and watches him flinch. She clocks that reaction. She always clocks that kind of thing.

They both carry pain in ways they don’t talk about. Travis with his family issues, mainly his dad. Natalie had an abusive dad who died right in front of her.

It’s different kinds of pain, but they recognize it in each other. That hollow thing.

He hears about her reputation long before he knows her. Everyone at school talks about Natalie Scatorccio like she’s a warning sign. But when he actually looks at her, really looks, she’s not wild. She’s tired. And he gets that.

Natalie sees Travis and thinks, that guy’s trying so hard not to feel anything, it’s almost funny. But she doesn’t laugh. She gets it. The numbness. The need to just disappear into silence.

He starts selling weed. Not just as a rebellion,because it’s something to do. Something that makes the world quieter.

She finds out and starts showing up to buy from him. Not often. Just when things get bad at home. They barely talk during the hand-offs. But every time, he gives her a lighter, even if she already has one.

One night, she stays. Doesn’t say why. Just sits on his bedroom floor and starts talking. He doesn’t know what to say. So he sits down too.

They bond over music. Natalie makes fun of his burned CDs. He says her taste is 'aggressively sad.' “So what? Yours is music for people who think silence is too loud.” It’s the closest they get to flirting for a while.

He sees her at a party once, wasted and detached. Some guy’s trying to pull her into a room. Travis steps in, barely says anything, but the look in his eyes is enough.

She doesn’t thank him. But later that night, she texts, I owe you. He replies, you don’t.

Travis doesn’t like touching people. He flinches when friends try to shoulder-bump him. But one night, Natalie curls up next to him on the couch and falls asleep. He stays still for hours, afraid she’ll leave if he moves. He never tells her that.

They don’t date. That would mean labels. Talking. Feeling. But theres a shared understanding of something more.

She wears his hoodie. He drives her home even when she doesn’t ask. She grabs his hand when she’s scared. He doesn’t pull away.

They fight, a lot. About nothing, about everything. “You don’t even try, Travis.” - “At least I’m not trying to destroy myself every time someone looks at me wrong.” Then silence. Breathing. Tears that neither of them admits to.

After one of those fights, Natalie slams his door behind her. Comes back the next night with mascara still under her eyes. She doesn’t say anything. Just stands there. He walks up. Stops a foot away. “I’m not good at this.” - “Me either.” And then she kisses him.

It’s slow. Tense. A little shaky. Like they’re both afraid to want it too much. But when they pull apart, she exhales for what feels like the first time in years. And he stays close.

[junglejim4322]

there is a guy who i met through my job, we were the first to come out to each other at work, myself as bigender intersex fag and him as a gay guy. but i have like man pussy and huge tits im literally gandalf big naturals. im very feminine even though im a man. trying to present more androgynous this year. anyways over the years like he was really accepting towards me being a gay man, he would flirt with me, and we had kind of a situationship going on, and he's like, called me just to say my name into the phone a lot and chat, he's cuddled with me, he's been very intimate w/me except when it comes to sex or like, kissing. so we've been like cuddling and going out places together but not kissing or sex. and he would flirt with me about wanting to be my sub, i used to make him laugh and blush a lot, he's said he's attracted to me multiple times before. and recently when we were all out drinking i was complaining bc i never like fag out, i mostly fuck women because im just like. scared of men (except him). i was saying like damn i need like a subby bisexual nonbinary man and like hes been back and forth on whether or not he's bi - my friends all said i was delusional for thinking so - but then he like outright said "damn that's like exactly me it's too bad im unavailable" like WHY would he say that 😭 but what shocked me was moreso that he actually IDs as bi now, but he says he never goes for women because he's scared of interacting with the phenotypical female form, but then he was like "ive always known im attracted to ftms even before i knew i was gay" ... and im like his only transmasc friend, we have an inside sort of joke where I tell him "sorry my transition is taking so long" ... ...during that same convo at drinks he started saying to me like "by all means [myname] you're very attractive to me, like i find you to be a beautiful woman, you're attractive to me" (im bigender and have complained abt not having my womanhood affirmed also just fyi) but like.... like what am I supposed to do here. another friend who knows us both says he only says he's attracted to me to make me feel better. but i know him well enough to know i can't make any moves on him because he'll be like. idk. like i can flirt with him and such but i can't like ask him out or do anything with him. so like am i crazy. is he crazy. are we both crazy. is there something here or is he using me for emotional support since i gas him up all the time and reaffirm how beautiful he is while he continues to fuck other guys. like should i just give up on this guy or is this like a slow burn long ass thing where i should wait and see if he suddenly figures out if he wants to deal with man pussy like he literally repeatedly says hes attracted to. am i just not man enough since im femme. Thoughts

This may be a harsh stance (and it probably applies in a very different way for nonbinary people) but I do not ever get involved with people who are unsure of their sexuality/exploring it at least in a way where I’d be an outlier and I do not recommend any other openly queer people do either. They have their own issues to work through etc etc but you can end up dragged all over the mud in the process. It also sounds like he sees you as a woman but im not sure how you’d feel about that or if im wrong. Good luck but I’d let this one go imho bc so much is going on also I never would’ve read this if you didn’t put something as intriguing as “im literally Gandalf big naturals” in the opening statement so good job on that Gandalf big naturals..

[anamericangirl]

I'm genuinely curious about something: You know leftists complain about the electoral college and say we should change to just doing popular vote when it doesn't go the way they want it to? (at least, they did that the last time Trump got elected, idk about this or any other time) I'm really interested to know how many of those people switch up and sing the praises of the electoral college when it does work in their favor and how many still think it's a bad system even then.

Because even if I may not agree with everything or anything they say, I honestly would have a LOT of respect for someone who sticks to their guns on a topic regardless of how it affects them personally.

The inconsistency on the left is one of my biggest issues with them. Like they don't have to share my values but they can't even remain constant in their own alleged values.

Things that were good five minutes ago are bad now that Trump is office and bodily autonomy is an absolute right until they agree everyone should be forced to wear a mask or get a vaccine.

Even if I disagree with people, I respect them more when they at least consistently adhere to the things they claim to believe instead of flip flopping depending on the topic or what's currently popular or socially acceptable to believe. Unfortunately, if you're looking to the left sticking to their alleged values, you're looking in the wrong place.

[sapphicscholar]

Hacks Episode 4x01 Thoughts

*Okay I did this in past years and found myself missing having the records of my thoughts for myself, so I'm back! I've seen through ep. 5 at this point, but I’ve been keeping casual notes for myself and am finally writing them out properly and posting them in case anyone else is curious!

Continuity and tension! I love that we pick up from nearly the moment season 3 ends, rather than trusting the audience to fill in the gaps of where that early tension would have lived. Far better than some of the choices to elide these moments in earlier seasons! It also lets us have scream-worthy moments like Deb’s “why don’t you ask that little cunt what really happened” and the delightful voice crack of Jimmy’s “WHY, AVA, WHY??” – also, Jean’s face acting in that first scene in Ava’s office is chef’s kiss. But I really am so pleased that they didn’t hold back at all on the tension (and I SO appreciate that there are moments where they both seem perversely pleased about it; they’re crackling, and that’s my favorite version of them)

I actually think it’s fascinating to hear Ava’s view that “nothing amounts to anything with Deborah” – it gives us a nice glimpse into how deeply the betrayal of Deborah’s lie about the head writer job cut. Because I think Ava would have been pissed and wheedled and pushed Deborah if Deborah had been honest about her conviction/fear that the network didn’t want to see such a major shake up, but the fact that Deborah looked Ava in the eyes, lied point blank to her, and then refused to acknowledge that she'd done wrong by Ava (and even tried to sell it as a good) is what destroyed Ava in ways Deb I don’t think totally got or gets now (maybe will ever get). Regardless of whether viewers personally think Ava was justified in the blackmail, this line drives home exactly how much progress in their relationship that moment undid for Ava, and that's BIG

Marcus! In my notes about the finale of S3 I noted that I would be much cooler on the episode if we didn’t get to see Marcus quit and JPL instead left it to the imagination, so I’m really grateful they’re not just disappearing him (also the fact that it played out a bit like in my post-s3/imagined s4 fic is just the cherry on top). I do truly believe Deborah would have exactly this kind of outsized reaction, not being able to hear Marcus on his own terms or trust what he’s telling her when she’s bleeding people left and right. And the fact that it feels like a rehearsal of the last time she nearly got Late Night (the “fucking timing machine” as she says in that beautifully acted moment) can only amplify the felt sense of betrayal and hurt, even as we the audience can see it’s not remotely the same, that both Ava and Marcus care about her in ways Frank and Kathy and the old boys’ club in charge most certainly did not.

Transposition into the Corporate Workplace – I think there’s a lot of interesting questions this ep raises about what happens when you move two people who’ve honed their dynamic in isolation from the larger world because in many ways, it actually exacerbates their issues by simultaneously forcing near-constant proximity and taking away some of their less-traditional avenues for working out much of the tension (there’s no throwing rocks! There’s no nearly abandoning each other at roadside motels! There’s no storming off and half-quitting only to realize you actually still want to be with this person!). This also comes out in the press event where we see the worst of Deborah’s personality rear its head (and it's exactly the kind of thing we should expect! We saw how she dealt with hecklers on the cruise! And here the press aren’t hecklers! They’re not breaking the norm; they’re doing exactly as they should! But Deborah can only read an interruption of the laughter as a personal affront, and that’s biting her in the ass now.)

The party! The photoshoot! Truly everything about these two scenes was so perfect. It’s so messy, so open and bloody and real. It’s everything I wanted after the end of season 3 with how deeply they both hurt each other.