#the world is cruel and homophobic and mean for not letting me have this all all at once

[m1ssunderstanding]

Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 3.1

I thank my lucky stars every night that Yoko eventually got sick of playing secret-keeper.

Paul: I didn't leave the Beatles. The Beatles have left the Beatles . . . John said he wanted a divorce. Alright, so do I. See how they say “Beatles” and they mean each other sometimes?

Derek Taylor on John's position on the break-up: if Paul were to approach him and say “let's do it together again” he probably would; with no more words, he would probably do it. Which is an insane claim to make to a world full of people grieving the greatest band to ever exist unless you are very very sure of that probability. But if it's true that that's all it would have taken, and Paul didn't do it? That hurts my head a little. Do we think he was just hurt too bad to want it back? Do we think he didn't know he had that kind of power? Do we think he was glad to be free of the group?

Ugh my heart can't take it. I'd cry too, John, watching that. I mean look at how they are looking at each other. Look at everything they've lost in a year. I'd bawl like a baby too.

Paul sends John a long, thorough letter, begging for them to legally end their partnership outside of a court. John's run out of cards at this point, but he still doesn't want to lose Paul, so he's just going to play dumb.

This is how bad he doesn't want to lose him, actually: he goes along with Klein in tricking Paul this time. Calls him up and asks him to come to the studio for a jam session, because it'll hurt his case in court. But for multiple reasons – the Eastmans were knowledgeable lawyers, and Paul might not have even wanted to be in a room with John at the time anyway – Paul doesn't come. Which John would've been hurt and angry over, no matter his motives.

"They tell you to stop crying at about age twelve. Be a man. What the hell's that?" I'm so proud of John for his (albeit long and backsliding) journey out of his toxic masculinity and violence. Something I honestly don't see him achieving without Yoko.

And from that quote it transitions to Paul in Scotland, looking like the embodiment of depression, as the opening of “Isolation” plays. It's perfect.

“And don't try to come over here. Or you might get in some trouble.” The way he just froze when he saw them filming him and then the next thing we see is him threatening them? Get ‘em, babe!

John sounds so giddy about this one-upping competition with Paul. I'll scare him and then he'll scare me!

The whole Lennon Remembers era is such a terrible case of diarrhea of the mouth in general, but the amount of homophobic language is quite striking compared to how John talked before and after.

John, talking about George in Rolling Stone: "he was working with two fucking brilliant songwriters and he learned a lot from us." People read that quote and just parrot it like they do with everything John said in this period and act like George had nothing to be angry over. He had every right to be much angrier and hold a much bigger grudge than he did.

And about George's new record, which was phenomenal and brilliant, John is transparently jealous and so cruel. If he'd said that about me and then asked me to play on his new record I'd tell him to go to hell. Why did George do it?

See and everyone who knows John knows how much he loved Brian and to hear him speaking so crassly and cruelly about Brian must've been a sure indication to them to just take the entire interview through that lense of “oh he's just saying shit”. But that's only the people who knew him. Everyone else for the rest of time took this shit as constitutional. And it pisses me off. It should be locked away in a vault somewhere and no one is allowed to listen to it until they've passed some kind of Beatles and emotional intelligence tests.

This crushes my soul. How warped must his definition of love have been by that point that he genuinely believed Phil Spector and Allen Klein loved him more than Paul and George did? It's bonkers.

John in 1967: all you need is love! John in 1971: the point of life is to manipulate people. . . . What the hell happened to you, buddy?

I go back and forth as to who's the smarter PR person: John or Yoko? Because maybe she's right. Maybe they shouldn't divulge that they're master manipulators. But is this one of those times when it's good to be all “look how honest we are about this! We're not hiding anything! We're saying bad things about ourselves too! So you should believe us about everything else!”

Really this documentarian should be hired to make all the music videos for all the Beatles and solo songs. This one for “Too Many People” is perfect. Paul walking into court with a full beard and a confident stride, John and Yoko in bed, Paul horse riding overlayed on Linda's gorgeous face like she's some goddess, designing his fate. All of it is just pure brilliance.

I'm forever laughing at just the title of the song, too. Because to John and Yoko it was so important that they were Weird and Off-putting. Different. Revolutionary. And to say “no. You're not special. There's actually an excess of people like you.” Is so funny to me.

“When she wants an A side, that's when we start fighting.” Oh gosh. Remember how I said he backslides a lot in his feminism journey? Yeah…

Insanity quote Hall of Fame. Yeah, I know he meant to say it's weird to be best friends with a woman. But it sounds like he's saying it's weird to fuck a woman. Which maybe he subconsciously means both idk.

Paul: we need to legally dissolve the partnership because it's the only way we're attached anymore. Ouch. Okay it's true. It's deserved. But that must've stung for the guy who was terrified of losing people. Must've sent him into fight or flight.

I think the point of this framing is to say that if they'd had facetime back then, instead of just crackly phone lines, HDYS would not have been written. Not with those puppy eyes staring him down like that.

Interviewer: the song wasn't even funny though. John: well I think it's hilarious. Interviewer: hmm. Lol I love hearing interviewers talk to John about his lyrics like he's a real guy doing a real job, though. Imagine a music critic now saying John Lennon wasn't clever in his lyrics. You can't, yeah. Me either.

What a slap in the face to Cynthia. Guess she wasn't Cool Girl enough. Should've gone girled him. That would be an excellent fic. Cyn and Jane gone girl their idiot bfs and John and Paul realize they're in love on death row. But anyway, yeah. If Paul would've just pet John's head . . .

Another absolutely bonkers thing to say. That's something the Rockstar’s ex wife says in a documentary ten years after he's dead, not something a songwriting partner says, completely unprompted, in an exiting the band interview.

And then he goes off on what I see as a self-soothing diatribe on Paul the family man. You can see the hoops he jumped through to get himself there. What did Paul want that I couldn't give him? A family. And is that justified? Absolutely not, only pussies and conservatives want families.

Allan Klein: were you and Paul ever really close, then? John: no. John: not that I didn't love him. I did. It's just that every time I let my guard down, he hurt me. Holy shit. At this point, after getting hit in the face with so much of John's Paul-made pain with nothing from the other side but pictures of the happy McCartney family, I'm genuinely feeling quite angry at Paul. Me. An extremely biased Paul girl who knows it's far more complicated and multi-dimensional than this. No wonder the uninformed public fucking hated his guts.

And as they're showing this quote, “I didn't want to hurt you,” plays mournfully in the background. They really are so twisted up in each other there's no separating individual identities.

Okay so he's a psychopath. So what? He's the sexiest man that ever was or ever will be. He's allowed to be a horrible person. No, but really. He's Get Back Paul but healthier. He's done with his depression drinking and he's been spending a lot of time proving he's still useful enough to exist by building fences and shearing sheep.

And this is how Paul talks about George to interviews. John said Klein made ATMP a success but Paul disagrees. "George recorded it all, wrote it all, did it all, wasn't anything to do with [Klein]. It was George's victory, wasn't it?" Compare that to how John does it and tell me again why the hell George is Team John?

What is Paul's obsession with daddies? Actually I know exactly what the obsession with daddies comes from, but we won't get into that here. I do find it interesting that in ‘69 he's saying “we do need a sort of central daddy figure.” And in ‘71 he's deriding John needing one and won't let John's daddy of choice touch him with a hundred foot pole.

I tend to think Paul chafes against authority in general, but that's actually not right. He never had a problem with George Martin. I think it's just abusive authority or authority he doesn't trust yet.

[therainscene]

It’s funny that Bylers are so often accused of being delusional, because I was at my most delusional when I was anti-Byler.

I spent most of S4 refusing to acknowledge that Will had romantic feelings for Mike, despite knowing damn well what all that love triangle imagery and sad gay pining was implying. I convinced myself it was just bros before hoes drama; that perhaps Will wanted to come out to his best friend but felt nervous after six months of radio silence following “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls!”

The van scene forced me to accept that he really was in love, and it pissed me off because what was even the point of making him fall for a straight boy?

Mike’s bizarre “no homo” behaviour was clearly a symptom of growing up in a conservative 80s household, and witnessing Will’s sacrificial act of love in the van was the shitty lesson he needed to get over his homophobia.

I saw a typical straight male protagonist in an 80s coming-of-age film getting to coast his way to self-actualization on the back of queer suffering; a cruel and homophobic trope I thought we’d moved past by the year 2022.

But then the NINA reunion scene rolled around--

--and I immediately picked up on the heavy parallels between Mike and Will in how they greeted El. The realization hit me like a tonne of bricks: Mike feels the same way about her as Will does.

I thought, “wait, does this mean I was wrong about...? Oh my god. No way.

No fucking way.

Will was in love with El this whole time?? What the fuck, he’s been gay since S1 and she’s his sister this is BULLSHIT I will personally strangle the Duffers--”

Heteronormativity is a hell of a drug, kids.

Let this be a lesson to those of you who think media illiteracy is to blame for Byler denial -- how well someone understands the mechanics of storytelling is irrelevant if they insist on treating Mike’s supposed heterosexuality as an axiom instead of an evidence-based conclusion. The issue lies with bias, not literacy.

I was stubbornly anti-Byler because I knew I’d immediately fall in love with this ship if I allowed myself to have hope it could be canon, and the general state of queer rep in mainstream media meant I was all but guaranteed to get hurt if I was so stupid as to have hope. But in my desperation to cling to the “safe” heteronormative outcome, I only ended up hurting myself with my own silly assumptions.

We’ve seen both canonically gay characters in the show make exactly this mistake, needlessly hurting themselves with their silly but self-defensive assumptions about their love interests.

Stranger Things absolutely nails its depiction of the subtler ways internalized homophobia can manifest -- Will may feel like a mistake and be prone to beating himself up, but he isn’t some pitiful self-loathing queer who wishes he was straight, either. He’s just so crushed by heteronormativity that he accepts it as an inescapable fact of life and lets it guide his beliefs and actions.

Don’t get me wrong: Will, like Robin, is very sensible for being cautious in such a horrifically bigoted environment -- trying to openly defy that level of homophobia by yourself, especially when you’re young, is a bad idea.

But unlike Robin, he clearly struggles to accept that he has the right to chase his same-sex love interest. He's no longer simply exercising caution, but conforming to homophobic standards -- much in the same way I thought I was sensibly refusing to be queerbaited, when really I was just agreeing with the heteronormative status quo.

I realize now that this is the real reason Will was written into a homophobic 80s trope: not to teach Mike an outdated lesson in acceptance, but to maneuver Will into position for the lesson he’s going to learn in S5 about resisting conformity.

Will needs to learn that castrating himself to make straight people comfortable is a bad idea too. Not only is that a miserable way to live his life, but what sort of world is he leaving for the next generation of queer kids if he never questions these homophobic standards?

It’s just the cycle of abuse scaled up to the societal level.

This is what gives me confidence in Byler endgame. Queerness isn’t just an incidental element of Will’s personal arc, but suffuses the show to its very core -- it’s in its themes, its allegory, its characters.

So Will getting the boy isn’t just nice fan-service for Byler shippers, but a necessary ending if the show’s most important lesson is to land:

That it’s rewarding to make the difficult choice of standing up to bigotry in the face of forced conformity. Of choosing love.

Could it be the case that I was right the first time, and Stranger Things is going to turn out to be yet another heteronormative mainstream show that doesn’t commit to its own themes? Sure, maybe. But that wouldn’t invalidate the valuable lessons this show has already -- and apparently accidentally lol -- taught me.

Anyone who calls us deluded for hoping a mainstream show is going to have a gay pairing as its main couple just doesn’t realize -- or doesn’t care -- that they’re contributing to the very problem they’re describing.

[rayclubs]

Which tf2 merc do you think gets mischaracterized the least?

Good question! Let's do a rating.

In my opinion, there are three aspects to characterizing someone.

Facts - you have to get basic character backstory right. This includes all objective canon truths, events, and, well, facts about said character.

Behavior - you need to understand how the character acts, how their interpersonal relationships function, what they're like in their day-to-day life. This is the nitty-gritty of fanfic and fanart, this is dialogue, line-to-line characterization.

Integrity - you need to understand the character's core beliefs and principles, what their values are and how they view the world around them. This isn't something you can easily quote or point to as a mistake in fanfic, it's more of an overall idea of a character.

Each of these is going to be worth up to three points, with zero for terrible characterization that gets everything wrong. This would ideally total to nine points. I'll be awarding an additional bonus point for character interpretation that doesn't make me scream "he would not fucking say that". Let's go.

Scout:

His backstory is fairly simple. He has an absent father, half a dozen siblings, and a crush on his boss who doesn't reciprocate. People mostly get this right, except they also call him a virgin despite the fact he canonically lands the fried chicken queen, and seems to do it with ease. 2/3.

His behavior is also mostly portrayed accurately, in that he's loud, obnoxious, self-absorbed, and can be kind of a dick, though not completely without endearing qualities. The fandom is, admittedly, guilty of making him more insecure and self-conscious than he actually is, to amp up the drama. 2/3.

His core values, however, are completely off. The main interpretations I see of him are "depressed Scout", "homophobic Scout", and "baby Scout", neither of which is true to his character. This is a grown man with a force-a-nature complex. The homophobia is just projection and internalized prejudice, but that phenomena is too complicated for me to dissect here. I talked about it before and might make another post later. Anyway, 0/3.

Scout does not get a bonus point. He would not fucking say "poggers" but he would say "daddy-o".

Overall characterization score: 4/10

Soldier:

Very little is known about Soldier's backstory so there isn't really any room to be wrong about it. What we do know is also vague and unreliable, so it's open to interpretation. Given how little room for error there is, I'll give him a 3/3.

His behavior is completely off in most cases, often shown to either be overly aggressive or so dumb you start to question how this man functions in his day-to-day life. Canon Soldier has plenty of endearingly stupid moments but a lot of them can be read as deadpan jokes on the character's part, and many turn out to be secretly clever moments, such as him infiltrating the robot base with a goofy cardboard disguise. Likewise, canon Soldier has plenty of aggressive and mean moments, but he's not cruel and very clearly not a threat to his teammates, which isn't captured at all in fanworks that decide to go that way. 0/3.

Soldier's core ideals are mostly captured well, as in - yeah, he calls people communist as an insult in fanfics. I feel like he should mention God more often than he does in fanon, it's, like, one of the two ideologically meaningful things he ever talks about. The importance of "America" as a concept to him is mostly preserved but left unexplored. 2/3.

Soldier does not get a bonus point, he would not fucking say [homophobic slur] yet here we fucking are.

Overall characterization score: 5/10

Pyro:

His backstory is nonexistent yet people still fuck it up. His technical knowledge is clearly extensive and impressive, as shown by the complexity of his weaponry - which, mind you, looks HAND MADE - but people treat him as if he's altogether incompetent and maniacally stupid all the time always. He also ran an engineering company for hell knows how long and people just forget about it because they're allergic to adults or something. God this pisses me off so much. I mean for fuck's sake, people act like his full job description is "Pyromaniac" and not "Pyrotechnician". I'm so tired. 0/3.

His day-to-day characterization and dialogue is also completely off. People treat him as if he's INCAPABLE of communication, make him obsess over childish things he's only shown a moderate liking to in a manner that's borderline creepy and insulting, and take away his whole entire agency in everything he ever does. I will literally not give y'all a single point, you do my man Pyro so dirty. 0/3.

His ideology is complex and vague in canon, and I don't blame people for getting confused by such things as Pyrovision, but FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. In my time on Ao3 I've seen animal Pyro, cryptid Pyro, monster Pyro, alien Pyro, evil mindless maniac Pyro, incompetent baby Pyro, nonbinary Pyro (HENCE MY PROBLEM WITH THE HEADCANON, do you see how it looks next to all these other interpretations?) but I've rarely, if ever, seen competent adult Pyro with actual hopes and dreams and agency. 0/3.

Pyro does not get a bonus point because he would not fucking say "uwu" but he would say "fuck", let Pyro say fuck.

Overall characterization score: 0/10 are you fucking surprised

Demoman:

Oh poor lad what have they done to you. So, Demo's backstory is arguably the most detailed and fleshed-out in the entire canon. Too bad nobody fucking read it. Admittedly, in the recent years I've seen people mostly manage to remember he has several jobs and is overall a competent and successful man, but it's rarely - if ever - explored, I've seen exactly one fic where the author bothered to explore what one of his other jobs might be (and it was not a good fic for many other reasons, don't ask me for a link), and it honestly feels like people don't want to dwell on it? Like, they mostly mention it to fill a quota, y'know? Here, I'm not racist, I've acknowledged one of this character's achievements, leave me alone. Also the subject of him being fucking adopted as a kid never comes up. 0/3.

His day-to-day characterization suffers a lot because people think alcoholism is the most morally repugnant thing that can ever happen to a human being. This man honestly barely even has a presence in the fics he's in. Are you wondering where Demo is? Well, he wasn't there! He was BUSY! He couldn't come! There is a handful of writers who bother to write his actual inner monologue and point of view, and this point goes out to them only. Also there was a pretty good Boots and Bombs fic in which Demo was a dick to Soldier but then got better, and it stuck with me. 1/3.

His core character is fucked up by fandom because he's either all flaws or not allowed to have any flaws, and there's no in-between. Ever since I joined the fandom I've seen a lot of critique floating around, and people mostly seem to listen and realize they've been mistreating the man for long enough, but it created a whole separate problem of Perfect Demoman which is bland and boring. People don't want to write an offensive caricature but don't feel like fleshing him out either, so they just make him great at everything and never let him fail and grown in ways that are meaningful. Except that one fic I mentioned earlier, but I've already awarded a point for that. 0/3.

Demo does not get a bonus point. I couldn't find a meaningful example of bad dialogue because, like I said, he has no presence in any of the fics he's in. He would fucking say something.

Overall characterization score: 1/10 and honestly it's too generous on my part.

Heavy:

Okay so Heavy's backstory really confuses people. I've got like a dozen asks in my inbox when I called his father a revolutionary AND a counter-revolutionary. Wait till I call him a royalist, it'll blow your tits clean off. I don't feel like explaining the history of the communist regime in the USSR on this post, let's just say people are mostly faithful to canon but don't really "get" Heavy. 2/3.

His day-to-day characterization is plain bad. He's treated like a mother hen to the mercs when he's more of a stoic friend with a mean streak and a crude sense of humor. I think the main problem is the dialogue, people just can't give him the dignity of speaking in an intelligent manner. It's honestly also pretty bad in the comics. 1/3.

His core ideals are fine, if oversimplified. He's not a complicated man, he loves his family, his guns and his doctor. People rarely give him any more depth than that but it's not offensive to his character or anything. I feel like he should have more political opinions than people give him. I also feel like people make him way more protective of Zhanna's romantic pursuits, to a creepy degree. I mean, yes, he's annoyed by her marrying Soldier, and seems horrified for a brief second, but it's not like he's against it or anything, he's just kinda surprised? Anyway, 2/3.

Heavy does not get a bonus point because he would not fucking say "da". Pizda.

Overall characterization score: 5/10

Engineer:

Yeah people mostly get him. He's got 11 Ph. Ds. Some treat him like he grew up as an actual cowboy or something but most remember he's a nerd. I'd actually give all the points here because Engie's backstory is NOT complicated. 3/3.

His dialogue and day-to-day characterization is also okay, though people really mellow him down a lot. I had a bit in one of my fics where he said something like "let's teach those sumbitches how the real killin' is done" and like three different people commented on it saying they liked or were surprised by his mean energy. It's not even that mean, I think it kinda shows my problem with his interpretation. 2/3.

I asked about mischaracterization once and a lot of people replied "Engie is the most mischaracterized because people treat him like he's good but he's actually evil" which I think pretty much covers it? It's hard to write someone who is not implicitly strictly good or strictly evil. Engie treads this balance really well, I'm actually convinced his demeanor is not a facade, he is nice at times and mean when he wants to be. Fanon Engie can only be one of two things and neither is right. 0/3.

Engie gets a bonus point as an exception. I actually can't tell why, people just have his voice on-point. Is his accent and manner of speaking really that easy for you? I struggle to write him a lot. I think he should say "bitch" more.

Overall characterization score: 6/10

Medic:

People focus on the fact he lost his medical license more than on the fact he HAD a medical license in the first place. Other than that he really doesn't have a backstory. I dislike that people try to give him a sad one, I think he grew up loved and maybe even a little spoiled, but I can't fault others for not following my headcanons, so. 2/3.

His dialogue is the WORST because it's written phonetically. His goofy yet self-confident energy isn't captured well at all. The best I can put this is "people wife him" but it sounds kinda mysogynistic so really I'm at a loss. Submissivepilled breedablemaxxer. 0/3.

His core values are also all over the place. The complicated thing about writing Medic is that he actually doesn't come with pre-packaged drama. His backstory is vague, his demeanor is optimistic, his vibes are fun, and the worst thing that happened to him in canon was working with the classics for a bit - people amp it up to squeeze hurt out of it, which is fine, but not many people actually like going there. Thing is, fanfic writers aren't that good at writing drama when it hasn't been established before. They have to warp his character, make him edgy, self-conscious, or plain mad evil without redeeming qualities. I remember really struggling with my big Medic fic because I wanted it to be dramatic but had to put a lot of work into actually building up the emotion, because Medic is fine. He's fine. He's alright. He's fine. He's doing well. 0/3.

Medic does NOT get a bonus point, he would not fucking say "babygirl" and I'm not even sure if he would say "yass queen slay" I'm SORRY

Overall characterization score: 2/10

Sniper:

People mostly get his backstory right, probably because it's the most well-explained in the comics and it gets the most "screentime". It's also literally a Superman parody which is funny and memorable in concept. 3/3.

People can't find a good balance between stoic professionalism and social anxiety. I think Sniper is actually pretty simple, in that he's a little self-conscious which pushes him to actively better himself as a professional, but also makes him a little awkward so he comes across as standoffish and a little mean. He's a solid bloke that's balanced and feels real. Fandom has to go for the extreme every goddamn time with him. It sucks. 0/3.

People kind of get his drama, his relationship with his family and whatnot - mostly because a lot of us losers can relate, I bet - but, again, go for the extreme in making him anxious, whiny, and sad as a wet kitten. Unless it's a porn fic in which case he's an absolute freak that growls at people. I don't know what it is about Sniper that makes him so difficult to characterize. Manic pixie dream boy. Dark and moody lover love me like no other. 0/3.

Sniper does NOT get a bonus point because he doesn't say "cunt" nearly as often as he should. Also send me asks about my Sniper takes I want to stir up some shit.

Overall characterization score: 3/10.

Spy:

The only piece of his backstory we actually know is that he fathered the blight of the earth that is Scout TF2. 3/3.

His obnoxious and insufferable demeanor is mostly captured well. A lot of his portrayals aren't nearly as classy as people think they are, but that's because most authors are themselves proletarian, myself included, which is fine. Not many make the effort to pepper his speech with French words it would actually be natural for him to say, and blame it on the nonsensical complexity of the French language, but I'm not buying it as an excuse. 2/3.

His core values are off in regards to Scout - he's often portrayed as soft, mellow, overbearing, and critical of Scout's love life to either a comical or an uncomfortable degree. His fandom portrayal often also lacks the self-confidence he's demonstrated in the comics. Spy is not above strangling a man with a chain that holds the shackles around his ankles, he wouldn't consider it a blow to his dignity to fuck any of his coworkers either, come on. He's also funny and goofy but the fandom tends to neglect that. 1/3.

Spy does not get a bonus point because he would not say "perchance" but he would say "your mother".

Overall characterization score: 6/10

The final scores are:

Spy - 6/10

Engineer - 6/10

Heavy - 5/10

Soldier - 5/10

Scout - 4/10

Sniper - 3/10

Medic - 2/10

Demoman - 1/10

Pyro - 0/10

There we go! Pyro is the most mischaracterized, Demoman is a close second, and nobody is characterized well. Cheers!

[emptymasks]

so there's an interview with david jenkins up on gizmodo about izzy's death and i have feelings. again.

the interviewer is a big fan of izzy. and jenkins is upset that they are upset about izzy's death. i know he probably doesn't want to make people really upset with izzy's death. but how could he not have known how beloved izzy was. perhaps he didn't realise how many more people would come to love him over this season.

trying to console the interviewer by saying "ghosts exist in this world" since when? buttons turning into a bird might not even be canon, it's left as this maybe, so don't make up and give false hope that he could come back as a ghost. that feels cruel. i know he's trying to make the interviewer feel better but man. don't make promises you can't keep.

of course he took it hard.

izzy didn't get much time to belong though. i love that speech he gave. but for him to get punished for it. to kill of the character with the most growth because it doesn't matter because he's not as important as ed. izzy deserved better than to a plot device for ed to grow.

'to see their friend go' uh.. i don't think we got to the point where stede and izzy were friends yet. sadly. because he died too soon for that to happen. i think being buried near them, and without his ring that they took of his corpse, is selfish on ed's part.

i don't know how this is kind. i don't know how you can describe this as kind.

i... am almost laughing since i feel so delirious reading that. you wanted to avoid killing your gays by.. killing one of your gays. right. an.. upbeat note.. i.. how.. did you really think no one liked izzy that much? maybe he didn't expect so many new izzy hands during season 2 but...

again the interviewer gets upset about izzy's death. jenkins tries to console and comfort them but couldn't. i can't believe he didn't see this coming. i'm sorry he's sad too. though surely he wanted people to be sad? to feel sad about izzy's death? maybe he didn't think anyone would take it this hard. but i'm sure con could have told them different given the stories i know people have told him about how much izzy means to them. i think it's wrong to call the show homophobic, i think the show is still a great piece of lgbt+ representation. and i also think the ending was rushed and izzy's death wasn't fair (and not enough people accept that ed abused him and was his abuser and no one should have to give their abuser closure) but i think if he had to die it could have been defending the crew, and not being stupid enough to let ricky have a gun, because that didn't feel very in character. i just. i'm with the interviewer. i'm not mad at jenkins i'm just disappointed and upset. and i know he didn't mean any of this maliciously, and yes i know it's all fictional, but people are still allowed to complain and be hurt. no matter how stupid you think that might seem. there's no need to get angry at people who are upset about izzy's death. these are just my thoughts and feelings and there's no ill will too anyone who disagrees with me.

i'm sad at you.

[retributory]

i honestly kind of find it blatantly offensive that people act like it's weird for xie lian to be submissive because he's also a strong character, especially because this is often posited as if it's somehow more morally correct for him to be dominant. the fact that this is parroted so often on the other hellsites is mind-blowing to me because not only is it just homophobic nonsense, it's obvious that he's submissive BECAUSE he is strong.

let's put aside the fact that xie lian was raised in a religion and culture that strictly punishes sexual thought and action and that he barely even knows how to process his sexual feelings let alone act on them. have you ever stopped to think about the actual soul-crushing horror of being unable to die no matter what?? in the coffin by itself he was there for 100 years, staked in the chest, in complete silence and darkness, in stagnant, unmoving air. alone. he's so used to being starving, poisoned and in pain that he straight doesn't even notice it sometimes. he has been drowned, stabbed, set on fire, poisoned, trampled, suffocated - and he never ever puts aside time to process that or talk about it. he puts other before himself 100% of the time. he time and time again destroys himself willingly. he IS strong, because he HAS to be strong. he has never been allowed to be anything but strong.

so it is, i think, objectively a good thing that hua cheng makes him sit down and be selfish sometimes. i think it is good that hua cheng makes it so that xie lian doesn't HAVE to be the strong one all the time. i think it is good that when xie lian feels comfortable ignoring pain and hunger, hua cheng bosses him around, gets stern and mean, makes him eat, makes him wear something comfortable, makes him enjoy himself. hua cheng knows what xie lian wants - he also knows that xie lian struggles with wanting. domination is not something selfish and cruel, and it's absurd and homophobic to view it as such. he enjoys dominating xie lian, of course, but he also enjoys being able to fulfill the needs and wants of his wife, even when xie lian struggles to realize or articulate them. nevermind that xie lian's pov makes it clear that he delights when hua cheng is "wicked and tender" to him . . .

xie lian does not know how to be kind to himself. he spent 800 years calmly accepting whatever terrible thing would happen to him, spending most of it alone, shrugging off all misfortunes because otherwise it would be completely maddening to actually fully bear the weight of the suffering he goes through. why wouldn't it be comforting for him to let his husband that he loves more than anything else in the world take the reins for him . . . ? why wouldn't he like to be treated like something soft and precious to be tenderly taken care of instead of shouldering the weight of everything by himself all the time? xie lian is barely able to conceptualize the idea of intimate wanting at first because he has had it so hammered into his brain that wanting is something to be ignored and pushed down. he likes being dominated by hua cheng because hua cheng forces him to be selfish and indulge in pleasure that he is simply not able to allow himself to feel alone.

you have to ignore so much of the text to believe that it's out-of-character somehow for him to submit to hua cheng, and yet i see it all the time so SOMEHOW people are interpreting it this way. i fail to even begin to comprehend why this is so widespread. mind-boggling

[inventedfangirling]

Hello this is basically a long post about me sorting through my feelings about bad buddy and why it means so much to me.

So over the past few weeks ( i first watched the show 7 weeks ago) ive been trying to figure out what exactly about bad buddy and patpran in particular have got me so inexplicably fond and devoted to them and apart from the usual answers of great writing, directing, performances and the best most electric chemistry and banter known to humankind, i did arrive at couple of other answers too.

First of all pat and (especially) pran are deep and well rounded characters.

Their worlds feel lived in and real.

Their feelings and thoughts and motivations are of course excellently portrayed by both ohm and nanon. and they gave representation to queer people everywhere. pat being the pan/ bi king he is and pran being the gayest babyboy warrior poet ever. pran especially given his repressed nature and emotional closed-off-ness is somebody a lot of people surely saw themselves in, including myself. seeing myself represented like that starting off the way he is and then taking small steps one by one over the course of the whole show (and over years in the show's universe) to arrive at the more assured, more open, more ready to be vulnerable (but still very much the pran we all loved in the first episode itself) was so wonderful to see.

The fact that the show happens in a non homophobic universe doesnt take away from just how special it was seeing queer characters fall, be and stay in love. and most importantly that they got their happy ending (i wont be hearing anything against this cos the ending was happy, despite the slightly bittersweet tinge of it, it was happy and there shall be no counter arguments begone i cant with that)

That episode 12 gave a glimpse of their future.

A world where pat will one day be able to sit with pran in his house eating food made by dissaya. that pran and pat's mom work on a common hobby together cos why not. a world where they no longer have to hide, a world were they could well and truly thrive.

Its so so important as queer people that we get representation and that in a world that is often cruel to the likes of us especially here in asia, that we see happy adult queer lives, where they can be in love in the most mundane of ways.

Patpran and bad buddy gave us that and i will forever be thankful for it.

That still doesn't capture exactly why i rate them as a couple so so highly in my head.

So i thought of patpran in the context of all the other love stories i could possibly remember watching. i thought of some of my top favourite couples - mondler, phil & claire, schmidt & cece, peraltiago, leslie & ben, jack & rebecca, randall & beth, simon & wilhelm, jaeyong & sangwoo, ji hyun & jaewon, bai lang & xun an, tara & darcy, sumi & rimjhim and so so many more and what stood out for me when it came to patpran was that they were the one couple out of all these couples i adore who didnt let anything get between them once they got together.

Every other couple among the ones ive listed have had jobs or other relationships or distance or parents or workplace rules /etiquette or circumstances or the royalty standing in between their love and as a result causing the couple to break apart ( a couple of episodes for mondler to seasons of confusion for peraltiago and schmidt & cece etc) even if briefly.

Except for phil & claire (who btw wasnt even sure about marrying phil when she did) almost none of these couples got together and stayed together throughout their relationship. and yes i agree that a lot of these obstacles and circumstances are very real and taxing and no wonder people chose their own peace at least for a while to deal with everything BUT i just cant help feel more appreciative of pat pran even more cos these two 19 year olds figured this whole thing out faster than any of those full grown adults did.

And yes its fictional and maybe even unrealistic (given the kind of relationships i see irl) yet patpran really do deserve all the love they get. they do deserve a lot of props.

Its not like they didn't have adverse obstacles standing in their way, they had to fight against their families years and years of lies and all the intergenerational trauma and their faculty rivalry and a shitty friend who outed them and any single one of these should have caused at least 12 episodes worth of conflict and miscommunication in any other couple.

And yes i do recognise that bbs didnt have the luxury of time or multiple seasons but they could have kept them apart for a whole episode at least, i was convinced we were in for that at the end of episode 8 as the aftermath of wai outing them. like there is no way the relationship comes out of it unscathed ( i thought! ). and while im sure they personally were rattled and betrayed (pran more so), instead of blaming anybody else or each other they actually chose to handle it together, they worked together and chose to move forward together.

The fact that such a terrible experience instead of breaking them apart actually reaffirmed to both pat and pran just how much their relationship means to the both of them, that they come out of it actually stronger??

i was friggin shook to my core.

And then came the gunshots and the family finding out and the running away and the coming back and the fake breakup and the pressures of all of this should have been enough to drive a serious wedge between any two characters, especially at their age and lack of experience. and yet??? and yet at each obstacle they get up, they draw the other closer and they get down to working on it together again.

Over and over and over and over again.

So for me what separates patpran from everybody else is the fact that ever since they got together, they have chosen eo, intentionally, that has made the difference.

Pat and pran's story may have been destined ( i personally don't know if i believe in destiny). they may have been born neighbours and felt unexplainable intense feelings (that later turned to love) for the other but when it came down to it, at its core, bad buddy soars when the two come together and they choose to keep being together, despite everything that stands in their way.

Love is a choice. love is a sacrifice. but its also a sacrifice and a choice they made for themselves and for each other and above all for their relationship.

Almost all the couples mentioned above arrive at similar destinations but they arrive at it with years of experience and years of struggle. i just cant help marvel at our teenagers who did love better than whole ass adults double their age could.

And more importantly above the awe i feel inspired and hopeful because they showed me that there's always a choice. thats there's always another option. you dont need to get out of your comfort zone. but you also dont need to be in the comfort zone always. you dont need to keep lying to yourself. you dont need to hide every single part of you. there are always other options. there is always a choice.

That hope is not just a noun its also very much a verb. That you and i and each one of us can make that choice.

That if ever i choose to partner up with someone and if we do proper healthy communication (patpran invented healthy communication and consent btw, they deserve EVERYTHING for just that but thats a whole other post) prioritizing the relationship where it mattered, i too could have something ( even remotely) like their love.

For the first time in my life probably i felt like that kind of love was attainable for me if i wanted to pursue it. They gave me hope. and they gave me joy. and i will never not be unbelievably grateful for it.

[not-goldy]

Not to ruin the mood, I love Jimin so so so so much. But it just hurts my soul to see him with Taemin a known colorist 😭 I would like to know how others are feeling

That's alright you already killed the mood sis💀

But let's tak about it.

When my sister first moved to Seoul all she did was complain about the people over there. They were mean and rude and racist, colorist, texturists, homophobic you name it.

A few years later, she'd be the one to lecture you about cultural relativism and how some things have been so normalized in those parts of the world that she can't tell anymore if they do all those things to be mean or their just being Koreans.

I had a Nigerian friend too (not trying to come for my Omo Niaja people😩) who'd bleached her skin so much she was near passing as white- save for her under eyes knees, elbow, and knuckles. She was giving real life kunfu panda.

I thought it was strange she'd do that and I complained to my other friend about it and he said, well what's wrong with being light skinned? I am light skinned. Do you think being darker makes you better than I am?

Imagine my shock and surprise😲

It occurred to me then how light skinned blacks also experience discrimination from the black community as well as nonblacks because they are perceived as not "black enough"

Colorism is insidious and prevalent even in media as light skinned black brothers are often overlooked for most roles and when they have to be casted at all they are cast in limited roles. Think Duke of Hastings and Bridgerton and all the roles dark skinned black actors fill as opposed to the light skinned poc actors on TV.

You can be black but will still not be black enough because you speak or sound a certain way, you'd hear you're "pretending to be black" you're pretending to be white, you're "an oreo" as if there's a proper and standard way of being black.

Black people are not monoliths. We come in all shades of black and from various cultures.

But Colorism is the cousin of racism and like racism it can be perpetuated by our own people- sneezing at Chris Brown. Goofy fella that one.

I am not going to defend Taemin.

I know his culture puts him at a disadvantage and exposes him to so many normalized behaviors that outside his culture is and would be construed as perpetuating oppression.

Kpop idols do undergo training and are educated on issues of racism and misogyny and other harmful practices indulged in innocuously. A little bit of self awareness will go a long way.

As long as he acknowledges this challenge, practices mindfulness and is ready to apologize for his actions and most importantly take steps not to repeate them I think he can be forgiven and shouldn't necessarily be "cancelled" for minor infractions.

The internet elves can be so sensitive at times💀

There's this concept in law called the principle of proportionality which is just common sense for the punishment must fit the crime.

You don't cut off people, or deplatform them for harms they've caused negligently unintentionally. Thats toxic and unlawful and extreme, cruel and unusual punishment- hate the crime and not the person as they say.

Saying all this to say, I, Jimin and others can love Taemin, be his friend and still condemn oppression in its various forms.

Expecting Jimin to cut off his closet friend, alienate him and ostracize him for his media blunders that aren't a true reflection of who he is at his core is toxic. True friends don't act like that. Let's be real.

[stephofromcabin12]

🫵 this is gonna get personal for a sec, I'm bisexual and demisexual, and my family keeps making homophobic comment. I haven't come out to them because of the comments, I just need something honestly.

[I have not edited this and I wrote it p soon after waking up so apologies for any typos or tangents — I hope the point shines through — in case someone hasn’t told you today: You’re valued, You’re worthy, You bring something to the table no one else can bring; Yourself. And I’m glad you’re here🩷]

Hey lovely anon,

Let me start by saying: You owe no one the priviledge of knowing that side of you. That’s a gift you choose when and where and to whom you give. Just because they’re family does not automatically give them an all access-pass to all of you. It’s a privilege earned through mutual respect and kindness. Don’t feel that you must come out to them, especially if you worry it’s not going to be received well.

I understand the wish to share it, because it is a part of who you are but you must remember that there is no arguing with ignorance, especially not if it’s stubborn and self-inflicted.

A therapist once told me that everything people say to you is a reflection of themselves. Meaning, if people feel the need to joke about you, point fingers and criticize you unwarranted, it’s usually a marker that they see how evolved you are, how smart and accepting and glowing you are. They see how easily you rest in yourself and allow others to do the same; and they’re uncomfortable with that because they lack those skills, and so they must try to knock you down to their level, so they can feel better. Let them try. The key in doing that is to Observe their behavior but don’t Absorb it. Know that it’s not you they’re talking about when they say those things; it’s them. And that’s got absolutely zero to do with you.

Don’t sink to their level, that’s exactly what they want, anon. Rise above it, floating over their lowly, narrow-mindedness really puts just how small their world is into perspective. Becoming bitter only festers into something worse, and you shouldn’t allow that kind of rot into your garden, it you can avoid it. Cut it out at the root and let something better and healthier grow instead.

Next, I want you to remember that there are people out there who will celebrate you, who will love you and accept you as you are and as you grow, regardless of what labels you pick up or put down or replace or find again (because labels are just a marker of here and now, not a definitive statement, because people aren’t definite—I’m not trying to sound like those people who say sexuality is just a phase but rather that you should focus on what feels like you right now rather than search for a label to put on it; sometimes there isn’t one, and that’s okay too. Which I’m probably only feeling called to say because I wish someone had told me that when I was younger and obsessing over what word to introduce myself to the world with, instead of just introducing me as myself)

And maybe your family can learn how to be those people, in time, if they’re willing to learn; oftentimes people are cruel towards things they don’t understand—and it’s not your job to force someone them to understand, anon.

You can present the opportunity to them, but you can’t make them learn. They have to want that for themselves. Give them time, sometimes they need that. But if they refuse then that’s their loss. You don’t have to make a big fuss about this. You just don’t grant them access to that part of you indefinitely until they earn it back. Simple as that.

A piece of advice from someone who had to learn to bite their tongue instead of engaging with idiocracy: Sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is learn to shrug it off. No, it’s not fair and you want to educate, you want to share your truth and teach them some empathy. But you can’t. It’s not up to you.

And it’s an endless cycle. They won’t learn until they want to. So unclench your jaw, and drop your shoulders and learn the beautiful words: “Sure, whatever you say!” Before promptly moving on so you don’t feed their need for discussing things they dont understand or have a say in, in the first place.

They expect a fight. They expect to be proven right in their belief that they’re the rational one by making you lash out. And if you simply dismiss them in a levelheaded way, then you strip them of both of those things. You signal that “I heard what you said, but that’s an immature and uneducated thing to say, so I’m going to give you the grace of letting it slide and moving on” - akin to not entertaining a petulant child; they don’t know better, or feign not to anyway. So you’ll treat them as such. They say kill them with kindness, I prefer gentle redirection. You’re not hardening to match them, you can be firm and gentle at the same time. That’s real power. That’s maturity. Take a deep breath and tell yourself that your journal and or your therapist will hear all about this.

But move on. Save yourself the added irritation.

Next ask yourself: Do you love yourself? Do you accept yourself? Have you made a home for yourself in your body and soul and stand by it, no matter what? Do you show up for yourself and trust yourself?

That’s all you need at the end of the day, anon. The opinions of others who don’t understand you—and sometimes don’t wish to understand you— don’t matter. The right people will not always understand you at first; but they’re curious about you, and want to learn about you because they love you.

I can’t say if your family falls into that category, and the experience of hearing harmful, ignorant comments from the people who are supposed to be in your corner is all too familiar in the community. But my old 7th grade teacher once sat in our class, which consisted of 20 young girls—all of whom struggled with our identities in one way or another— and told us a story about her son, who was maybe 5 or 6 at the time. She told us how he came home crying after being called names by the other kids in his class. Before messaging the school, she sat with him, hugged him and asked him to repeat everything they’d said. Every little thing.

He did. He listed it all— admittedly very juvenile insults but to a five year old they’d been detrimental— and when he finished, she looked him in the eyes and asked:

“Well, are you?”

“Am I what?”

“Are you all those things?”

“No! That’s why I’m so upset! It’s not true!”

“Okay, then that’s all that matters. Who cares if they *think* you are something. If you know you’re not, you’ll prove them wrong eventually by simply not becoming their assumptions.”

I’m sure she phrased it more in a way that a young child would understand but to us, who were older: 13 and having to decide who we were, it was a golden. Once you know yourself, anon, it takes a lot for people to get to you. Because anything they throw at you, you simply hold up to the truth of you, and if it doesn’t fit; throw it away. It’s not yours to keep then.

Regardless of the outcome, if you choose to come out— because it is your choice, and you don’t have to be out to be in the community, and you don’t have to be out to everyone you know— Know who you are. Rest in it.

When people question it or try to tear it down; don’t crumble. You can’t be a twig here, anon. You have to grow to a point where it takes more than a miss-step to break you.

You have to rest in your own self like an old oak tree with roots reaching miles down into the earth and branches stretching tall to the sky; unafraid to be seen— because there’s nothing about a tree that doesn’t belong here. You’ve grown that tall on your own; you’ve earned this spot in the sun just by staying true to yourself.

All that noise, wind and earthquakes doesn’t matter. You’re rooted in the earth’s core. It’s taken too much strength to grow to be knocked over by a gust of wind or stone thrown. Tree’s aren’t bitter either. Or vengeful. Its so easy to become that but don’t. It’s not worth it. Be as a tree: observing, sometimes seemingly still but always growing quietly. Be everything you wish to have: you want safety and security; become a shelter for yourself. You want friendship and love? Become your own biggest adorer, and your own most trusted friend. You want power and respect? Learn to be powerful without being cruel, and to respect yourself even on your bad days, and bad years. When you do that, others who have done the same healing will recognize it in you, and vice versa, and you’ll find what you’re looking for when it’s meant for you; because you already have it all in yourself. No one can take it from you, or give it to you if you’ve already given it to yourself. And why shouldn’t you? You deserve all those things and more.

Stand tall, anon, and know yourself. You know who you are, and you know there’s people out there who love you, and support you, even if you haven’t met them yet.

I’m with you. You’re not the first to walk this path and you won’t be the last, in that sense you’re never alone. We’re all cheering you on☀️

[enchantra35]

Reflections on V4 & V5 of RWBY by a first time watcher

(Lengthy post ahead)

Hi, it's be again, back on my bullshit. First of all, I'd like to say that I didn’t expect my first post to get that much attention LOL. I'd like to clarify (again) two points:

First, I agree with most people's explanations. I didn't mean to sound like I was accusing fans for not thinking that bumbleby would become canon. My intention was to point out to some earlier hints, and I realize now that I could have used some better phrasing. As I explained elsewhere, when rwby aired, I was too young to know anything about the state of queer representation in media at the time. Now of course I know better, although I never got to experience that kind of anxiety - at least, not to that extent. My second point is that I was mostly referring towards homophobes and incels who were trying to persuade shippers that bumbleby wasn't happening, and not to fans who couldn't be certain due to the overall circumstances.

With that said, the aim of this post is mainly to discuss some things I've noticed while watching volumes 4 & 5. There wasn't much I wished to comment on after finishing v4 as I found it very transitional, so I decided to do one unified post for both volumes, especially since someone suggested to watch these volumes as one. Let me now get to the main points I'd like to mention.

-Edit: I forgot one of the most important motifs imo; the moon. I noticed how each volume it looks bit by bit more ruined, showing how the world below is also falling it chaos and society as it is known is destroyed. Also, it's eventual (potential) complete destruction will make the nights darker, symbolizing the triumph of evil. I love subtle details like that.

- Ozpin's and Crow's dynamic really reminds me of Dumbledore and Snape. Ozpin in particular reminds me very much of Dumbledore - and I definitely don't mean that as a good thing. Although he clearly has good intentions and he's a "good guy" per se, sometimes it feels like he's using his students as sacrificial lamps for the greater good. Personally, I'm not exactly font of the idea of pushing the fate of the world onto the shoulders of a bunch of teenagers. Oscar is still a KID and all he's ever known is how to be a farmer and suddenly he's sharing a body with one of the smartest and most powerful people to ever walk the earth and their fates are suddenly intertwined. That's so insane. And on top of everything, Ozpin isn't 100% honest with him. I'm glad that Yang confronts him about keeping secrets. I will give it to him however that he's honest enough to admit his mistakes.

-Raven is probably one of the most fascinating characters. Can't say whether I like her or hate her, but there are so many layers to touch upon. It's interesting how she's constantly trying to prove to others - and essentially to the viewers as well - that she's cruel, smart and calculating (and she definitely is all those things) and that she doesn't care about trifle things, but ultimately she fails, as it is evident by the end of volume 5. She does care about Yang (although she has a very strange way of showing it) and her tribe most of all. She's also smart enough to see Ozpin's shortcomings.

- I liked how they explored Yang's trauma from loosing her arm and how she copes with the loss. "A part of me is lost" is such a powerful statement and it points to how everything has changed, but Yang accepts it.

-At the same time, that girl has no chill with that prosthetic arm. She straight up dismantles it off her shoulder just to win the wrestling against Nora (and later on to elude Mercury. I bet that if anyone asked her to give them a hand, she would just toss it on their feet then laugh her ass out. She's so silly, I love her.

-With that said, I wish they could have explored a little bit more of Jaune's trauma, but still I think we see well enough how Pyrrha's death has affected him. But why the FUCK did they have to give him more trauma in order to unlock his semblance? Another of his friends almost dies before his eyes, give that boy a break, good Lord.

- Ren and Nora 👀. I love me some good childhood bestdriends to potential lovers. Their background is so tragic but there's something about then growing up together that makes me feel things. I love their dynamic and I think it's pretty hilarious (collected, quiet guy and loud, silly, powerful girl). It was nice how they gained some catharsis when they finally killed that monster. And the symbolism when they hid under similar building where Nora tried to calm Ren down? Literal tears.

-"I was struck by a lighting and I lived. What a Wednesday" GIRL WHAT, LMAO

- I really enjoyed Blake's and Sun's dynamic, whether someone sees them romantically or platonically (for me personally it's the latter, but that's besides the point). Sun has always been a great friend, and although he can be really annoying sometimes, he is there for Blake and he's able to make her see things clearly and persuade her that isolating herself isn't a good thing. I feel like without him around, things for the Belladonnas would have been very different. He's a bit of a himbo, but I love him.

-The angsty Bees got me really well this season. Yang's anger is definitely justifiable and she has every right to be upset.

-"What if I wanted her to be here for me?" BITCH-

-Weiss pulling the "what's that supposed to mean?" every time the Bees are being angsty will forever be funny to me. The OG Beekeeper.

-That said, I think that she explains Blake's point of view really well and I liked how she reached out to Yang although "they aren't that close" (her words, not mine) and seeks to comfort her.

-Did I say that I hate Weiss's family? (Except maybe Winter, but the rest can go burn in hell). I'm GLAD Weiss realizes that ream RWBY is her true family. You love to see a good found family trope.

-Genuinely CANNOT stand the Bees this season /j. Blake seeing her team again and the only person she calls out for is Yang? And Yang's puppy eyes when she sees Blake again? WHY ARE YOU GAY?

-One of the funniest lines was when Crow was like "How can six children make so many noise while having dinner?", like BUDDY, you just answered your question. Tired uncle Crow for the win.

[acefaun]

I'm here after seeing you sad over your quiz results and I came to say😤❤️💖:

You're talented, really welcoming, kind and so cultured with multiple interests that make you happy! So you're not "unclear", you're dear to us and we all adore you and look up to you! I bet anything you want, you'd be the most liked character. The character were everyone puts them in the "This... Is a work of art." tiktok sound.

So keep your head high and walk forward as if you're the ruler of this land, or you simply don't care who the ruler is!!!

(⁠┛⁠✧⁠Д⁠✧⁠)⁠)⁠┛⁠彡❤️✨❤️✨❤️✨❤️

I DUNNO 😭 Y'ALL SO NICE TO ME ALL THE TIME. 9 times out of 10 I will cry when someone likes my stuff. It's just that I was sad before I took the quiz because of a mean Christian woman and so I was like "Let's cheer up by taking a fun quiz!" Only for the quiz to stab me in the back with grey phrases that people may or may not like me. It didn't hold back. As if I wasn't confused enough and full of self-doubt. 💀 It's not the ides of march anymore, it didn't have to come at me like this.

But bro, even gods cry. 😩 I just had to get that through my head first. I went through this whole narrative in the shower as if I were having a god-to-god talk with the creator of the universe.

"Why would a god make such cruel people in their world?"

"Character development for the main characters."

And that answer made so much sense. Because when I put it in my perspective, I literally did the SAME thing to my characters.

Why did I create homophobic and racist characters to hurt the main characters' feelings? TO MAKE THEM GROW AND BLOSSOM INTO THE GODS THAT THEY ARE!!

Me: Wanting to make a eutopia world where there's no troubles and everyone gets along because everyone understands a little thing called sympathy

Also me: ANGST

So yeah, I don't care who rules this world, I'm the god of my own. 😙 I like you guys. We're gonna take over the universe together some day.

And that's why I'm here. And so, YES, I SAY! I, your benevolent queer faun god, as I've just been royally dubbed, shall bless you with plentiful love in return! 💖💓💙🧡💓💝💘🖤💖💛💙❤️💚🤍💕🖤💘💛💜💜💗💝🖤💚💘🧡💓💛💔💜💞💙💖🤍💞🖤🧡❣️💓💕💞💛💓💞💝💕🖤💝🖤💙💝🧡💘💓💜💘🖤💙❣️🧡🖤💖💚💞💙💓💘🧡💖

[trannyradfem]

As a lesbian this post kinda sucked to read in the same exact way someone calling you a "cock-worshipping breeder" does for you. Let me break it down and explain what I mean by that;

It's definitely cruel to call someone that with no context. But the thing is, usually when I see that go down, there's context of homophobia first that the straight person in question is fully ignorant of, and also refusing to listen to us, which is also cruel. And that's why you're not going to get really any positive reactions from lesbians on this post despite directly addressing us. Because we are oppressed for our sexuality, and this still comes off as defending homophobia even if you don't mean it that way.

The reality is that plenty of straight women genuinely are homophobic traitors with internalized misogyny, and the only way we can protect ourselves is to watch how a straight woman interacts with us and regards our oppressions. And there's often much to be desired there, and that's exactly how I felt reading your post. You don't really get us. Because of the unique oppressive experiences of living as a lesbian, we see and recognize this more often than you probably ever will. That's how power dynamics and oppression work. So that's why it's best for you, as a straight woman, to try to learn WHY a lesbian would react that intensely to something you said. Because you're kinda proving my point here.

Think of the plethora of fundamentalist Christian women who say we're disgusting perverts that should go to hell, or that we're worse than men. Think of formative experiences in school being GNC and uninterested in boys, and how much we are bullied and tormented over that by our straight female peers. Think of how butches are seen as more predatory than literal males by many, MANY straight women. And think about how those things screw us over in the real world, and how men will happily call you much worse terms over much lesser harms. Straight women don't just call us names, some go as far as using us and exposing us to danger just to please their man. Many of us have been seriously harmed by that.

Even if you're pretty sensitive, someone calling you mean words on the internet is something you're going to forget in a few months to a couple years max. You gotta consider the scope of this and who your real enemies are, too, because your approach is also pretty ignorant of our struggles even from the get-go.

You say you acknowledge that we're oppressed, but in the same post you insinuate that it's "easy" for lesbians not to be with men because we're not attracted to them. That's a total erasure of the concepts of comphet, and sex work, and rape, which are all HUGE in the dynamics of our oppression. We're not all lucky enough to be gold star lesbians because the fact is that most men are passively ok with or even get off to rape of women, and especially lesbians because we are fetishized.

That is the exact homophobic ignorance I'm talking about. And if you're this attackey-- especially on issues you should've really done more listening on as someone who isn't part of this oppressed class--, then yeah, I can see how a pissed off, traumatized lesbian probably would call you that shitty term. Here's a look into the immense pain what you said can cause--

I grew up in an abusive, alt-right Christian household and spent nearly 3 decades of my life with men. I was groomed as a literal 6 year old and forced into prostitution as a teen that lasted for YEARS, especially when I was homeless. I am so disabled I will never be able to live by myself, so I had no other choice but to rely on men for transactions of money and housing for sex and faked affection. No, the fuck it wasn't easy. It was a traumatic nightmare, a horror story that was nothing more than wank fuel for the men who victimized me.

Men don't ever really go "Oh, she's not having a good time/ she's not interested/ it's kinda fucked up to accost a mentally ill homeless woman for sex... maybe I should stop". You as a straight woman should know this better than anyone and sympathize, because you are also subject to this. So don't act like men see the "lesbian" label and actually respect that. I have to HIDE that I'm a lesbian because that makes me MORE LIKELY to get raped or sexually harassed.

Gay and bi women typically don't scour the streets for vulnerable, homeless, and/ or disabled lesbians to fuck and brutalize for cash. But men sure do, and sometimes even straight women will do it for their men. For me, being with men was not a choice. There was never a single chance for me to ever regard my sexuality as anything more than a dissociated transaction until I finally got a stable home and caretaker in my near 30s, because we are seen as a fetish-- even as children, and even by straight women!

I'm sure you've heard of the type of straight women to make out with lesbians at a bar or party for male attention. Or straight women trying to rope in lesbians for their male partner's unicorn 3 way fantasy. That heavily contributes to that oppression, and stories like mine. And the thing is, you have a choice there. You don't HAVE to ally with men to abuse and fetishize us, but many of you still do. You don't HAVE to settle for dating the worst men possible, you don't HAVE to stop dating entirely to be critical of misogyny and start rejecting shitty males that don't care how much they hurt you and us with their misogyny and homophobia. You don't HAVE to act like your only option is celibacy to be critical of how your words and actions affect us as a straight woman.

But y'all. Still. Do.

We don't hate you because youre straight-- we are angry at you because you and many other straight women CHOOSE to be ignorant as a class with power over us, and then stereotype us as irrational, angry lesbians when we try to call that out. That is literally just how complex oppression works. So yes, if you're not critical of your biases and you don't go out of your way to learn what lesbians are up against, it does come off as crazed male worship to us. Because that's pretty much always the reason when straight women choose to harm us. None of us really give a shit about the actual reason why when you're spreading homophobic narrative.

I have been with men, yes, but I am still very much so a lesbian. So don't act like we're all ignorant of how men can be towards in romantic and sexual terms, either. Coming out is literally a big deal BECAUSE the entire world tries to force us to be straight first as the default. That's comphet (compulsive heterosexuality).

We don't enjoy being raped and abused, obviously. Many of us are literally casually raped for most of our early lives lives, you do NOT get to call that easy. And no, it doesn't make any sense at all in that context to act like our hatred of men is unwarranted just because one of us went overboard with an insult.

Stories like mine are disproportionately common in the lesbian community, because our oppression isn't just a badge to navigate Tumblr politics with, or a name to call someone. It's a real life power dynamic that quite literally murders us and ruins our lives. So, no, I don't exactly have much sympathy for a straight woman who ignores all of that and then goes "But what about my feelings?". It's a lack of accountability. What of our feelings when you act like comphet, rape, conversion therapy, and sex work doesn't exist for us? That's not actually acknowledging that we're oppressed and anything you say after that fighting back is a moot point because at the end of the day, you were still homophobic.

Men hold power over both of us, but we are disproportionately affected by it. So when you act like lesbians calling out homophobia in a blunt manner is a major issue for straight women, you are in fact ignoring our oppression entirely in favor of "but she called me a bad thing!!!".

We aren't oppressing you by calling you mean names, but you're definitely oppressing us by fervently spreading this false narrative. That's the difference. Please humanize us-- try to internalize what I've shared with you if you have the time and energy.

I've said my piece about how a lot of people on radblr hate pregnant women. But I also don't particularly like the way a lot of them talk about straight women. I'll come out right now and say that I'm a token straighty. And yeah I don't particularly love seeing people say that we're all cock-worshiping breeders. Would you rather we become political lesbians? Sexuality isn't a choice, right? Now, I'm not gonna pretend for a second that we're the ones who are ACTUALLY oppressed, of course that's not true. But I don't particularly trust that people who say these kinds of things actually care about women.

And this idea that we're traitors because we date men and have sex with them is asinine. Once again, sexuality isn't a choice. It's kinda crazy for lesbians to act like they're all superior because they don't sleep with men. Like, yeah, of course it's easy for you. You're not attracted to them! Are we supposed to just abstain from any all sexual activity?

As with the misogyny towards pregnant women, people put the blame on women while ignoring that men are the problem. Having kids sucks cause men suck. Being in a heterosexual relationship sucks cause men suck. How can you call yourself a radfem when you attack women for men's shortcomings? You need to care about women more than you hate men.

[junglehomo]

the couple under my bed under the pillow side

are moaning extra loud

the guy is a skinny twink with curly hair and glasses i think and white

and hes gay and moved there bc im the only thing that makes him horny in his beard relationship

the woman idk what she looks like but she sounds bery very beyond annoying and has been cruel and also part of harrassing me

especially sexually

she moans for me in the morning and night and the guy diesnt care bc hes gay and doesnt care probably

they forced me to listen to them fuck for months nonstop jobless 24/7

i dont know them at all listen to them even

fight constantly about him being gay bc she catches him staring at me through whatever remoteviewing they have of me in my room when i change

they dont let me do anything or even lay on my bed because they are there having sex addiction

and screaming gay at me

i hate her so much

i hate them

but they will never leave move or do anything never take a break

theyre ugly and smoke meth 24:7 and do not work or anything just moan for me to hear

moan extra loud and angry at me

bexause i dont care and

she calls me gay angrily too

just a really angry ugly homophobic white bitch

who is controlling and stinks really bad and traumatizes men into being gay even me

they especially did not let me sleep

i dont know this woman at all not interested

and this bitch harrasses me over and over and over

moaning moaning moaning

and doesnt stop doesnt leave me alone

doesnt stop listening to me reacting to me

theyre so weird and the guy is obsessed with me too and so gay hes copied my voice during sex

several times

its been really disturbing and all i wanted was to sleep

this isnt even like a normal apartment type of neighbor

its squatting tweakers that fuck nonstop on a bender and do not sleep at all

like they are always awake and there

i spent so much money trying to get rest at airbnb

only for the pervert asian guy and big nose girl and their friends to follow me

and have sex in their cars iutside so i never get sleep

right now there are 3 couples under my room

they cockblocked my life just to do this

just to watch me

do drugs

watch their lies about me play out

and fuck to me

thats all they do and they call it gay

they also cockblock me from myself 😂

they dont like when i try to relax or even lay in bed too long

theyre jealous and vile and always have been and i did nothing personal to them at all i was always happy in my own world and they wanted to ruin it

while i just do my best to live this whole time by myself with harrassment 24/7 365

and they hide in their different tinted cars or duck down when i drive up close

i only know who's who

because these people are so tweaking

that they confirmed themselves when i called them out

"really?"

and thats how i know yup

thats you and you

because im psychic i saw it in my minds eye raw

and called it out with my voice and the squatters reacted to me in embarrassed and flustered ways

the asian dude been real quiet since i dropped what i know

its all confirmed

and i can never unsee it

i mean i never question my intuition

but

they just really confirmed so much with what ive seen irl on the sidewalk from how these people have acted towards me

this is what ive picked up just from that

and their voices

it really shows i dont know any of these people at all

dont recognize them from my life at all

didnt do anything to them

but i picked up on small signs and sloppy things these retarded narc tweakers left behind and figure things out fast

theyre so obsessed with me they couldnt help themselves following me

and trying to be in buildings and places around me

thats how i know who

theyre so sus and nasty

you can tell theyre not supposed to be in the restaurant youre in or new place youre going to

they stand out

the evil stands out and they behave like tweaker in the bathroom

theyre jealous and creepy and i could care less about them even tho they really really tried to invade my life

there is nothing for me here and i already devided that a long time ago

lol its not sad

but theyre so hideously jealous of my happiness

here they are

gooning to me

[blissfulphilospher]

I am just sick of the environment around me where I am never allowed to be what I want to be and it's sickening in a desi household or just not my home but this society and at most places in my country.

I was never allowed to make male friends, I have never been in a relationship with anyone either. Relationship as in where I could talk about it to my parents and friends and the person whom I think I am in a relationship with.

Most of my life growing up I have been surrounded with girls and I think I have always liked girls and it has always been harder for me to approach girls than boys to talk because I am heaven and high level of concious around girls. Where I just want...

I want female validation to feel good. Seriously.

But at the same time I can never tell anyone close to me or immediately that 'yeah I like girls' 'I am bisexual' 'no I— I support LGBTQ, I am a part of it' 'I would marry a girl before a guy'

A lot of people around me have always made fun of queer community, girls flirting with girls but at the word lesbian or bi going 'eww'

But from last couple of years I am in Delhi and people are not that homophobic or I haven't met homophobic people where I used to study and everyone was chill about everything.

Now I am going out of Delhi in a not so developed area because yeah I got a med college. (Yay!) But seriously I am afraid to be what I am because I went to reddit and Instagram and people are just HOMOPHOBIC there with capital everything and it's disgusting and they are just down right abusive and if you say you are a bi they are gonna treat you like a hooker who would so so so want to have threesome with them and their opposite sex partner. It's so disgusting and disturbing.

My heart cries for every LGBTQ+ person in this country and how much the majority just cannot be 'live and let live', they felt threatened by everything which isn't the norm. And especially since this hindutva moment started things are worse and people are cruel in the name of religion which was known to accept all.

I don't think my god hates me for who I am when she made me this way.

Yeah, in my family I have pretended to be like... I am not even heterosexual for my parents because I am not even supposed to like male celebrities or characters because good girls don't do that.

Good girls just pop out babies with a stranger they sell marry you to and never be open about sex at all. Or anything related to that.

My mother blamed me for having periods and I was fucking eleven and haven't even heard the word before because in advertisement they never use blood and I thought I am gonna die because seriously who bleeds from down in there for a eleven year old. My relationship with my mother was so good that I went to school crying and told her nothing and I wore a white skirt and thankfully it was halfday with ptm that day and my mother came but when she saw she was so angry for me getting periods at eleven and I even didn't knew what was happening to me, I thought I was dying. And she never told me but just told me to be quiet about it and bear with it. (gods, I love her but I just don't like her, I understand her but I don't want her to be the way she is) I mean she should have reflected on why I did not told her. But she never did. Because you don't talk about bleeding from your uterus, blood trailing down from your cervix to vagina to thighs to knees to calfs to foot to the floor.

I mean the world would be a better place if we just let people be whoever they are. And let them love whoever they want in a consented manner.

This is really... I just feel so much for women and queer people in this country and how badly we are treated by masses and they call us abusive and weird and what not.

I feel suffocated here and yeah it's polluted and crowded but I wish people were just... Chill. Because I am scared of the people out there. I am scared to be what I am in open because that's just gonna be worse for me and I don't want to live like this.

[sleepywyrldbuilder]

I was talking to a friend of mine that has pretty serious anxiety, and a terrible relationship with their parents, in large part because they don’t understand their anxiety. They tell my friend to just “not be a downer” or “try and think more positively” and it hurts my friend every time.

And it got me thinking about other cruelties, other bad things people do to each other. Because their parents aren’t being evil, they aren’t sitting down, cackling about how to best bully their child into having another mental health spiral. They’re just pre-occupied with their ideas of how to deal with a bad day, or pre-occupied with the idea that you shouldn’t show negative emotion, or pre-occupied with their work and not putting their full attention on their child and working out exactly what they actually need.

And I think that’s true a lot of the time, when cruelty happens. When bad things happen. The person who did it isn’t malicious, they’re just pre-occupied. Pre-occupied with a certain way of looking at the world, or another thing they think needs more attention, or their own personal troubles. If they stepped back and did a full, no holds barred analysis of what it was they were doing and what they wanted and what they want to be standing for in the world, they’d probably recognise things they do which they don’t like.

It started as a thought about homophobic parents, parents so pre-occupied with the fear of their child being seen as gay, or the demand that they strip away all sense of joy and self-expression that deviates from the norm, that they will go so far as to hurt and berate and bully their children. Because those parents sometimes do change, if they decouple from those pre-occupations. It’s not always an epiphany for them, just a gradual shift of focus.

Then it moved onto more political thoughts. Fascism, Genocide, Imperialism among other things. How a citizen of any nation can support their government doing those things- because they don’t. They don’t like it, they’re just pre-occupied with something else. Pre-occupied with getting to work on time, or feeding their children, or making sure they don’t look odd or break with the status quo or their local community, and it’s not that those things matter more than genocide to them, or that they don’t care about the big picture and other peoples suffering, it’s just that they aren’t focused on it.

People don’t focus on things just because they’re important, they focus on things because it’s what they normally focus on, or it’s what they were already focusing on. If someone supports something awful or does something wrong or participates in something cruel, it doesn’t always mean they don’t believe in the evidence that it’s wrong, or truly believe what they’re doing is right on the scale of principles and morality. It just means they’re focusing on a single aspect of it that they can justify. “For my community”, “For my safety”, “Happiness is Good”.

I’m partly writing this as a guide to dealing with people like that. Work out what they’re pre-occupied with, find out what one thing they’re hung up on, acknowledge it, but note that it’s not the most important part of the conversation.

But also it’s partly a reminder for myself. I’m pre- occupied with a lot. Doing exams, having fun, trying to analyse everything about what’s going on- sometimes to the point where I forget to be kind. I’ve gone through that with the friend I talked about in the beginning. Sometimes I spend so much effort trying to analyse what they’re anxious about that I forget my job in that instant is to just hear them out and let them have someone to talk to. The same goes with political things- I don’t pay attention to what’s going on in the world as much as I should, and I have instincts about political situations that jump out before I actually learn about what’s going on.

I don’t really have a conclusion here. Just thinking about it in general. Reminded of that one quote “never attribute to malice what can be explained with ignorance.” Basically just another take on that, really.

[palworld-cremis]

as a guy who read an absurd, awful amount of Jack, i gotta firmly disagree. I think the one real "rape scene" (ie the poison mv as a whole, i only quote the latter text because i believe this counts as multiple scenes, but you get my point) we've seen in hazbin was too sexualized and a bit exploitative. It felt shlocky and unnecessary to me personally, but as we all know it's INCREDIBLY contentious. but IN MY OWN PERSONAL OPINION i find it feels like a mix of shock "oh look at these AWFUL things done to angel dust!" and a bit tantalizing to the viewer (angel is intended to be sexy, hes doing sexy dances, and then oh no a big fat demon fucks him! how awful!). it's dissorientating and weird and not handled very well IMO.

Where as in Jack, the rape is CONSTANT. i genuinely do not believe im exaggerating when i say there is more rape in Jack than their is jack (the character). Because in Jack, the rape is there to tantalize YOU, the reader. the intent is supposed to titillate and turn you on. the author is putting women in these situations over and over and over, all the while framing it with "look at all these defenseless, helpless women about to be assaulted, and there's nothing they can do!" it happens to the children in jack too, might i add. remember that one chapter about the teenage girl AND her (female) caretaker both getting molested by the same guy?

And don't get me started on the weird homophobia of the whole comic. Let's ignore the entire arc of Jack dedicated to a gay man being forced to learn the moral "being mean to homophobic people is WRONG. you have to be patient and respectful towards homophobes or you'll go to hell for being so bitter and cruel!", the rape is also used to teach us the moral that rape is natural. All men are naturally inclined to be rapists in the world of jack (which is basically meant to teach real world morals it seems), except gay rape which is AWFUL DISGUSTING EVIL. Even all the other rapists know that gay rape is evil (from "the musical holes" chapter. guh...)

This is also ignoring the COUNTLESS times lesbians specifically are targeted, the author has a special affection towards lesbian characters being raped to... idk, give them character development? even in way later chapters, one there's even a lesbian x lesbian rape scene, with bondage and everything, specifically framed to be as gratuitous as possible.

Sure, the rapists are never intended to be sexy, but the assault is ALWAYS supposed to be a bit of a turn on to you the viewer (you know, cause it was made by a guy with a rape fetish). Like say what you will about how DOG ASS hazbin is at handling these topics. But at least it wasn't made by the same dude who made a comic about kids with cancer being routinely raped to death by their doctor.

And tbh, this is just personal preference, but I'd take 30 more "angel dust gets raped and its not very well written" episodes of hazbin over even one more chapter of the dogshit prolife rape-fetish furry comic that is... Jack 🤢🤮

(also no hate to anon or OP, im just throwing out my opinion on the subject, no disrespect towards your opinions ^^)

Why does it feel like Jack the webcomic treats rape better than Viv does. Jack. The religious shock horror rape kink ‘i cut my own dick off years ago. Balls too…’ ugly furry comic

I think it's because in Jack, even though it's basically the Spear Counterpart to HH/HB right down to the rape fetish and awful creator, the rapists still suffer horribly and the victims -- even the ones that don't survive -- come out on top in the end. Drip is Hopkins' fursona, but even though he's shown to be a desperately unhappy victim himself, he's consistently portrayed as a disgusting, pathetic monster. He's not sexy, he's not a silly little goofball, he's a vile sack of shit that even his own colleagues don't like.

[wabblebees]

homophobic how science has yet to invent a haircut for me that lets me wear it long+pretty+femme in a fag way sometimes but Also short+easy+masc in a dyke way other times