#the wheel keeps turning
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All or nothing. Thanks, executive dysfunction!
#adhd memes#adhd feels#rejection sensitivity#big mood#the wheel keeps turning#living with bpd#quiet bpd#feelings
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Wow I so needed this. I'm also sending it to my therapist.
#i needed this#the wheel keeps turning#point of fact this is from 2019 and is just as relevant#every moment we can live and thrive and help others is a victory
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channeled song for divine masculine collective
#evidently having some issues closing out karmic cycles#the wheel keeps turning#channeled music#twin flame#divine masculine#717
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#destiel#donald trump#riverdale#supernatural#spn#history really is a wheel that just keeps turning huh#birdy chirps
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Pictured: Loop being extremely normal as they lay in their shallow (homemade) grave as they meditate on existence and also if they have annoyed the Researcher enough THIS time for her to murder them and bury them alive.
(Spoilers - they did not annoy her even CLOSE to that much.)
And there is the required reverse image of Odile arriving - she's had a LONG day (i.e. previous loop), and due to this it will take ten minutes before she even acknowledges the shallow grave Loop is laying in, as she was distracted complaining about what Siffrin just did to annoy her.
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I'd say there's context for all of that, because like...there IS context? Here's the link to the series of fics that HAS that context even! But also...even with context...can't say that it's going to make any of this less weird.
Mostly Odile is looping because due to Loop's wish the universe got rewritten to make Siffrin's repression and emotional issues (the ones bad enough to get him stuck in a time loop in the game) 'someone else's' problem...or at least that's Loop's best theory atm!
Regardless, context or not, I'm quite happy with how the pics came out, and figured I might as well post them here too.
#isat#isat loop#isat odile#in stars and time#like a wheel ever turning au#odile looping au#my art#This was vaguely gesturing at the 'Siffrin gets woken up by Mirabelle' at the start of the game#but like#RADICALLY recontextualized to be near unrecognizable#also vaguely gesturing at the 'hanged man' tarot card because Loop's too fabulous to not pose dramatically in the grave they dug themselves#just to make a point#a point which odile then processed to ignore#Gotta say from the point that i got the vision of loop digging their own grave#the chapter basicly wrote itself#i love how much black humour In Stars in Time fanfics can have without it killing the tone by making it humourless!#It IS possible to write idiots in time loops dying horribly and still have it be a black comedy in pokemon#but LORD that was so much harder to keep the tone balanced with#....look.#i KNOW i have a thing for time loops#i imprinted on Steins;Gate when it first came out and was never the same again#that anime has it's many issues but also it rewrote part of my brain#...also...verbal ticks.#still say 'dootdeedoo~!' unironically#to be fair! I also would say 'nya' as a verbal tick - had to ACTIVELY unlearn doing it even so i'd stop doing it at lecturers in uni#why yes! i was REALLY easy to mock as a teen lol#anyway these tags got off topic#let's wrap this shit up
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Not being able to write for whatever reason sucks and sometimes making yourself write feels like pulling hundreds of splinters out of your skin, but it is so satisfying when you get back into a groove with your writing and can feel the wheels n gears in your head coming unstuck
#it took me about five days of writing like 100 words a day#but ive finally reached a point where i remember i am capable of writing actually#now here's hoping the wheels keep turning#writeblr
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how it feels to comment on fics u enjoy and reblog posts u like:
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Back at it again with another theory: What if Lucanis’ betrayal wasn’t a betrayal at all?
(obviously, spoilers below the cut)
During The Wigmaker Job, we have some dialogue between Illario and Lucanis about their position within both the Crows and the Dellamorte family. Illario wants Caterina to step down so he can take the coveted First Talon spot. Lucanis reassures him that his time is coming, to which Illario makes a snide comment about whether his cousin would ever go against their grandmother’s wishes. When they continue the conversation after the job, Illario states that Lucanis is the potential heir, that he’s her favorite, and that he’s unlikely to say no to her. Lucanis doesn’t argue, only insists that he doesn’t want to be First Talon, and that he hopes she’ll see reason before that. It’s mentioned again in Eight Little Talons - Caterina favors Lucanis. It’s well-known enough among the Crows that Viago and Teia discuss it in front of her (not on purpose, but she doesn’t deny it). He’s her prodigy through and through.
In the opening scene for the Lucanis quest in Veilguard, Caterina is poised, as you’d expect of the First Talon. She’s certain that the body they buried wasn’t her grandson, that it had been altered with blood magic. She doesn’t pose it as a theory, though: she poses it as a fact. It could, of course, merely be her confidence, but there’s another very unusual aspect to the scene – everyone else discusses how Lucanis was clearly betrayed, that someone must have sold him out in order for the Venatori to capture him. Caterina is the only one in that room who never speaks on it. She doesn’t ask for justice, doesn’t mention vengeance, never acknowledges that her grandson was sold out by someone he trusted – perhaps because he wasn’t.
What if, when Caterina comes to him with a plan, with an impossible request, he’s still her favorite prodigal grandchild, and he still does whatever she asks? She’s had him tortured before as a child, has tortured and starved and beaten him herself before, because it makes him stronger and more resistant to it in the future. He says in The Wigmaker Job that he used to hate her for it, but now he understands. He justifies it. All Crows justify it, because they have to - if they don’t, then the cruelty wasn’t for survival’s sake, and their suffering meant nothing. Perhaps he doesn’t even question it. When Caterina tells him that she has a job for him, he takes it.
What if the contract has a caveat? Sure, Calivan must die by his hand by the end of it, a little treat for a job well done, but what if his primary mission is reconnaissance, is discovery? The Venatori are using blood magic to torture and corrupt prisoners. It would behoove the Crows to find out what it entails and how to resist it, before it’s turned back on them. It would have to be someone so deeply, unabashedly loyal to her that when she asked them to infiltrate a Venatori prison, expecting torture at best, their own death at worst, they’d take the job anyway, no questions asked - someone Caterina can trust, certainly, but also someone who has never once said no to her.
And Lucanis has always been a loyal grandson.
#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age: the veilguard#datv#datv spoilers#veilguard spoilers#da posting#maybe it’s also just because she thinks it would make him stronger and that’s how she always justifies it to herself because she’s evil!!!!#she’s MICRODOSING her GRANDSON with BLOOD TORTURE and DEMONS to fashion him into A BETTER WEAPON#I keep hearing people be like ‘oh there’s a moment in the lucanis storyline where I GASPED’#and other than like ‘he was dead the entire time’ I’m like…… what would be that shocking#and you know what would be that shocking??#if he put himself through it on purpose#envisioning a line where he’s like ‘when Caterina told me to go I didn’t ask questions because I’m a good crow!!!!!’#(also I think that would REALLY give a good bite to his demon being SPITE of all things)#also also I still think that Illario kills caterina (if she’s actually dead) but y’know what?#if he does GOOD FOR HIM#also lucanis just happening to be bursting out of his cell when you get there…. SUSPECT#was he just ready to break out at any time? if so why did he stay and get tortured for a YEAR?#why were the guards so afraid of him?? what was he capable of???#‘you’re a crow’ or ‘but you’re not a crow’ ohhhh so you were expecting a rescue?#oh I am CONNECTING the DOTS (I haven’t connected shit) I’VE CONNECTED THEM#voelene#your caterina + illario post started these wheels turning and I am eternally grateful#also tho did update this slightly because I forgot about their conversation at the end of TWJ#also got so wrapped up in my hatred of caterina that I failed to consider another emotionally devastating option:#that lucanis was the one who wanted to go and caterina covered for him#now THAT’S got some bite to it too#and maybe Lucanis volunteering to take on a demon is why it doesn’t possess him fully#it’s like a wynne/anders thing it’s symbiotic
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‘Wash your eyes clean Cromwell. Do you think the king ever loved you? No. To him, you were an instrument, a device. We are no more to him than an engine of war or a dog. A dog that has served him through the hunting season. And what do you do with a dog at the end of the season?… you hang it’.
Norfolk, in saying this, is completely right about the fates of everyone in that room, apart from Riche.
Of course, none of them - including he himself - truly heed that warning. As Thomas did not in his own time.
They all, to use a Tudor phrase, look through their fingers at the truth it holds for themselves
#and the wheel of fortune continues to turn..#but yeah#afaik riche managed to keep Henry’s favour until the end?#wolf hall#the mirror and the light
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idk, crowsx3 design??? sdkjfh
the heads are all made of porcelain, and can rotate like that one horror short film with kevan brighting voicing in it
#artswin#quick sketch up#idk#tsp#tspud#crowscrowscrows#crowsx3#the stanley parable#stanley parable#the stanley parable ultra deluxe#ik im probably not the first one to come up with this but i have an idea for smth so i wanted to make a vague idea for a design first#my current idea rn is that. at least for my au. since theres three crows. there needs to be three sort of proctors for the game#and since proctors are people who oversee exams/officer with responsibility at a school#what im thinking is that narrator and curator are both proctors who “oversee”/“admin the game" (according to oxford)#or “one who is emploied to manage to affairs of another”/“person who takes charge of or acts for another” according to wikipedia#they both at least have control over the game (ie. narrator writing the script n stuff/curators museum etc)#but they need a third.#in 2013 tsp 432 goes missing. sees that the wheel needs to keep turning#the crows see him understanding the situation. and how he wants to keep the game going. so they appoint him as another proctor#thus timekeeper. who gets added on to manage the settings and time in ultra deluxe#i have more to say but idk just yet sdkjfhskdf#i feel nervous just bc idk if im stealing someones idea or concept for this. or even getting it wrong even if its just an interpretation#maybe later ill explain idk sdkjfkjsf
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Ɨ ΜỮŞŦ Ҝ€€Ƥ ŦĦ€ ŴĦ€€Ł ŦỮŘŇƗŇǤ…
Employee 432 fanart for @a-game-of-beginnings because their theories, characters, and art style are so cool and lovely. 🤗 Thanks for all the inspiration and talks we’ve had, hun. God bless you. ❤️🥲
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explorin
#quackity#foolish gamers#quackity fanart#foolish gamers fanart#qsmp#qsmp fanart#art#fanart#mcyt#mcyt fanart#foolish#foolish fanart#foolish g#foolish g fanart#explorin on the qsmp#gay ass pirates#ahoy#BIG WHEELS KEEP ON TURNING
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I'm always here for one of your 🌶️ Wheel of Time takes.
Heh. Then I shall not disappoint!
I think that while some of the criticisms folks have of the gender stuff in WoT is valid, a lot of the things people cite as objective facts/proof of Robert Jordan being a secret misogynist, is actually a case of people conflating the views and biases of Jordan's characters with his own beliefs.
One day I want to sit down and do a longer meta on the One Power, it's mythological roots, it's place in the WoT cosmology, and it's societal impact- and what the way it's written actually says about the vision of gender and sex the series presents vs what people think it says (hint: the series is not nearly as gender essentialist as folks like to claim). But for the moment I'll confine myself to this: Jordan presents the idea that, inherently, people are people first and foremost, and no singular flaw or virtue is confined to one gender, one nation, one people group, even one side of the good vs evil conflict.
Many of the same flaws that dogged male-dominated historical institutione that emphasized a higher mission, privileged tradition and entrenched power in certain closed off ways (such as the Catholic church), also dog the White Tower. Many of the foundless prejudices the patriarchy foists onto women ('they gossip to much', 'they can't be trusted with power', 'they need someone to keep them in check and on the Right Path', 'their soft hearts can't handle rough treatment') Jordan's world foists onto men just as easily- with different justifications and reason, but still as ultimately baseless. Any time someone makes a sweeping gender based judgement- the narrative almost immediately undercuts it, when it doesn't outright draw attention to the speaker being wrong (even the qoute-on-qoute 'world wise' characters like Thom deal with this).
People in Jordan's world believe that gender matters and matters a whole lot- but that belief is a self fulfilling prophecy. Virtues and flaws, sins and triumphs, victories and defeats- their all agender in Jordan's world. It's the character's belief that these things are gendered, born of their prejudices and biases, that make it seem like Jordan is making the opposite statement, when really what he's doing is asking you to think critically of yourself, and try to suss out where a character is coloring their own narrative to suit themselves, and where they aren't.
#I could keep going but I'll leave it here#before I just start listing off various tragic or awesome moements int he series by turns and how their pretty evenly spread by gender#wot#wot meta#the spicy take zone#wheel of time
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One thing I think about a lot is how almost everyone in TDP has like, a Shadow Self running around in arc 2.
Some of these are looser than others—Terry doesn't really have one; Soren loosely has one in Claudia given that like him, she's on the wrong side, but unlike him, is unwilling to leave—but some are quite overt.
For Callum, he obviously has Viren (+ Claudia and possibly Terry), but also specifically Finnegrin in 5x08 (seeking out / using dark magic to 'free yourself' from another's domain and tyranny, even if it's for different reasons). Karim is walking Viren's path, almost beat for beat and with a possibly Sun-and-dark-magic corrupted army on the way. Viren has Kpp'Ar (as a previous high and dark mage who eventually gives it up), his past self, and arguably Claudia ("Daddy look, I'm following in your footstep!") who likewise has him in turn. Ezran has the Orphan Queen ("You look so much like her") even if we don't know enough details to know what that truly means, yet, though it will likely be in a more positive light (as well as Harrow in the future). Rayla has Runaan (the bow, the behaviour), Kim'Dael (locks and chains and ghosts and banishment), and possibly even Aaravos, depending on how they spin his backstory next season (though he might apply to all the trio at one point).
Janai's direct comparisons thus far have been to her sister, Khessa, as she was her predecessor as queen. We see time and time again how different the sisters are. We also see Janai side with Aditi in the present day against her brother regarding the blood duel ("Blood fuels have been forbidden since the time of Aditi, you know our grandmother made the ritual illegal because it was nonsense!" "The ritual of blood and ash is ancient and sacred") and invoke her royal right to not free Kim'Dael, too.
Which is to say: I think the above framing of the nightmare — you're just like your sister, you're just like your grandmother — is meant to set up Janai's fears of succumbing to Khessa's fate just as much as walking her grandmother's path, two people both ended and threatened deeply by Aaravos. For Khessa, it was her arrogance, which Janai does not have much of; for Aditi, perhaps it was her mercy (whether true or what version she gave to Kim'Dael that was her downfall), which would make sense if Janai's choice to spare Karim (4x09) keeps coming back to screw her over. Or maybe it'll be her hesitation... only time will tell
#the cycle#JUST KEEPS TURNING ON AND ON. that damn wheel#dragons liveblogs#5x09#mini meta#analysis series#analysis#i need to update my meta page don't i#a song of love and loss#tdp janai#tdp#the dragon prince#the past is haunting us
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Alright, so this is basically...an art dump for all the pics i drew when i was trying to draft the ending i wanted my Odile looping Au 'Like a Wheel Ever Turning' which...is not even SLIGHTLY how this fic is going to end now, but while figuring that out i still like draw all this and had to do SOMETHING with it.
So figured I'd post it and be like 'hey! fun Odile looping act 5 boss fight vibes not connected to anything else!' since like...that basic IS what they are at this point lol.
The one cool idea i loved that i think is now FIRMLY ditched is the act 5 boss fight starts when Odile uses wish craft to splinter herself into two halves.
The 'old/current' her that is meant to be her coldly logical side, and a younger 'copy' version, which is meant to be the childish irrational side...that is what's stopping her just shutting down the time loop because she can't figure out how to be happy with her friends leaving.
I mean, if you murder the part of you that WANTS the wish to come true, that's basically a 'get out of time loop free card' right? Right! Totally sound logic!
Yes the 'young' version of her firmly believes that she's real, and also also got memories going up to about age 21, and also that she ought to be in Ka Bue not HERE among these french weirdos.
Also yes again, a 'young' Odile is EXACTLY as unhinged about this as you'd expect a 21 year old to be upon finding out that apparently the 'real' her think murdering her is the correct solution to this problem!
The shift of the fight was meant to have the inverse 'colors' shift from one version to the other by the end, wrapping up with the point where the 'original' Odile is forced to have a heart to heart with the personification of her perceived 'worst' qualities.
Pretty sure the vibes for this ending was a lot more focused on the resolution of having deeply complex feeling about EXPRESSING emotion directly to other people. That along with a side helping of how isolating it is to be perceived as a 'real' adult such that you can't be weak enough to ask anyone for help. Because really if you can't even be that then why are you any different then when you were irritating mess of a youth?
Not saying any of that isn't still present in the story, but like...there is a LOT of other stuff going on, and those themes are now linked into many other ones too, and that's not even TOUCHING on how Loop's been...somewhat complicating my redrafting lol.
...Also I might have drawn/plotted this version before i knew about two-hats lol. THAT also is a factor.
Anyway! Still liked all of these enough to want to do SOMETHING with them, and figured this worked, so i could like map out my thoughts on them, even if i never got to write this.
#isat#in stars and time#isat odile#odile looping au#I might have written out like...way too many edgy and utterly disjointed notes for this fight too?#but none of THAT compelled enough for me to want to try and even reread it lol#drew all of this in fever state of creativity back in like september i think?#kept having the thought of 'oh i'll make SOME of it work in the main story'#HA no i didn't - that was the denial and wishful thinking talking#Like there was even a version where the 'young' odile had to do the whole final loop with the group#and that's what forced Loop to join them - to keep her alive no matter the 'other' her's attempts to kill her#while 'old' odile took the place of the king during that final run#'young' odile was DEEPLY weird at the rest of the group for the record - while they were also weirded out + low key endeared#Also before the even knew who the 'final battle' was against young odile HAD loudly declared she was willing to die for 'you weirdos' soooo#Ah to be young unhinged and realised people CAN love you despite that...and that apparently this is reason to commit a murder to AVOID#...if i had a nickle for everytime i wrote a odile looping au where she tried to murder herself#i'd have two nickles#which isn't a lot but ect ect#this one is WAY more serious with it tho lol#my art#like a wheel ever turning au
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Sick and twisted that everyone keeps telling Nynaeve that what she saw in the test wasn’t real and couldn’t be real and then the show keeps showing us the viewers ways that it could be. Lan wearing his hair the same and Alanna telling him Nynaeve was about to go through the Arches can’t be a coincidence. Just like Egwene saying she came to the Tower to learn how to fight (which makes it seem like she’ll choose the Green Ajah) probably isn’t either
#I know that’s how the arches work#they take your life and your hopes and fears and create a scenario specific to you#but also it’s like they’re trying to tell us it’s just a different turn of the wheel#if they keep the flicker flicker scene I’ll be interested to see if they do something similar#wot on prime#wot show spoilers#nynaeve al’meara
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