#the way i nearly cried like wth

[odxrilove]

I GOT TICKETS FOR WAVE TO EARTH !!!! 📣📣📣📣📣📣

[lostgirlmuseum]

Bucky vs. Book

^Bucky on his way to you fr^

Summary: Bucky rushes to your aid when he finds out you’re upset. He’s never seen you this distraught before.

Pairing: Bucky x f!Reader

Words: 600 (I don’t think I have ever written something this short before wth)

Warning: It’s kinda angst?? But mostly fluff. 

A/N: Sorry I haven’t been on much lately, school is keeping me busy. I wrote this pretty quickly and it’s just a short little treat while I’m in the middle of writing a mini series. Idk when I’ll finish writing it, but it prob won’t be done this month. Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

Divider credit: @cafekitsune

“Bucky?” Sam asked.

“M’ busy.” Bucky mumbled, curling a barbell like it was a dumbbell.

“Someone just informed me they heard crying coming from your girl’s room.”

“What?” Bucky dropped the barbell on the ground with a loud thud. 

“Move, out of the way!” Bucky yelled, nearly knocking Sam over as he started sprinting to the gym exit.

Bucky ran so fast that he was bumping into walls and hitting corners, trying to locate the nearest stairs. 

He took the stairs by three, his heart hammering against his chest, his ears on high alert in case he could hear you calling for him.

Finally, he made it to your room, and swung the door open without a second thought, just needing to know if you were okay. Bucky’s wide eyes spotted you instantly, curled into yourself on the rug, tissues littering the floor, sobbing. He had never seen you so upset.

He wasted no time sliding onto his knees and to you.

“Doll? Doll, what’s wrong? What happened? Are you hurt?” He tried to lift your chin to see your beautiful face, but you barely acknowledged him, your puffy eyes cast down.

“My h-heart,” you choked, clutching your chest.

“Are you having a heart attack?” He couldn’t stop himself from sliding his hands all over you, checking for injuries.

“I feel– s-so sad,” was all you could make out between sobs.

“Baby, who hurt you?” He was panicking, he needed to know what happened, why you were so distraught so he could fix it. 

“Stupid book!” You cried, and flung yourself at him, holding him close, and tucking your head into his chest. Bucky immediately reciprocated, wrapping his big arms around you, squeezing you tight, one hand brushing your hair.

That’s when he noticed the outline of a book under a couple tissues.

“It’s not fair,” you cried, body shaking with each breath.

“I know, I know,” he soothed. He, of course, did not know, but he was enormously relieved to see the perpetrator was only a book. 

“They were supposed to end up together! They were p-p-per–” You squeezed him tighter, struggling to get the words out. “Perfect together! Why did the author ruin it? It’s not fair, it’s not fair, they deserve to be happy!” 

“Shhh,” he whispered, starting to rock you back and forth.

“It’s not fair,” you whispered through another cry, and collapsed fully into him.

“It’s not,” Bucky echoed.

Eventually your cries quieted and slowed, and Bucky kissed your forehead and let go of you. You barely had time to question what he was doing when he picked up the book from behind you and started to pretend to punch it. 

“Bad book,” he chastised, “you made my baby cry. Nobody makes my baby cry,”

You couldn’t help but giggle, and wipe the remaining tears from your eyes.

Bucky continued to scold it, and even positioned himself to body slam it.

“Bucky,” you full on laughed, “stop,”

“Not until it apologizes,” he grumbled, faking a chokehold on it. “Oh, shit–” Bucky rolled onto his back and held the book above him, acting out a struggle. “It’s got me baby, help!”

Giving in to his shenanigans, you leaned over and grabbed the book from his hands, and gave it your own weak punch. 

“Fuck you, book,” You sniffed and laughed.

“It can’t hurt you anymore,” Bucky said, patting your back. 

“Thank you, Bucky,” 

“I’ve got you, doll.”

“Why are there dents in all the walls?” Tony’s raised voice could be heard all the way from the floor below.

You looked at Bucky.

“What?” He smiled cheekily. “You needed me.”

Thank you for reading!

My Masterlist if you'd like to check my other stuff out :)

Oh oh and this is inspired by my reaction to Me Before You by Jojo Moyes. I hate that book so much. I love that book so much.

[kenphobia]

YOUNG AND RECKLESS!

"here's an idea! let's buy a cake, lure Elias out and throw it off a cliff. watch him get it."

summary. when the new hire and the hottest archival assistant become besties, all hell breaks loose.

contents. really really old content; somewhat ooc since i was too lazy to fix dialogue; wholesome, general fluff; there's not much of a plot tbh; not edited

The job were boring, you knew that from the very start.

When you first stepped into the Magnus Institute, a weird feeling had crept up on you like a snake slithering pass the halls and jumping at you with fangs sinking into your shoulder. Yet after the terrible, terrible interview with Elias and getting accepted into the job, that funny feeling slipped away once you settled into the notion of things.

You worked in the Institute for far longer than you would've liked, always having to look around corners because that sense of dread and foreboding death trickled in at the worst times possible (AKA when you're idly standing in the corner, waiting for the printer to finish its job). But the pay was good enough to pay your stupidly costly london rent AND your necessities at the same time, so you had to room to complain.

Though, you wish your boss wasn't so weird and creepy all of the time. Makes sense since this is an Institute known for collecting statements and artefacts regarding otherworldly, and dare you might say 'spooky', beings and events. And also for holding the highest MIAs/deaths record among all other academic institutes, but you digress.

Working in the library department was fine, nothing really big like the artefact storage or the achives. Like you mentioned, it paid a hefty amount and the place was quiet enough for your introverted self to get comfortable in.

Well, until you were brought into the archives and met the one and only (and possibly the hottest person in the archives), Tim Stoker.

After another excruciatingly awkward meeting wth Elias regarding your sudden promotion, you sighed in relief as you pass those doors and hear it close on you. You tried shaking off the feeling of being watched, but the loud pounding of your heart echoed louder than what your mind is trying to tell your body.

As you try to silently pass through the halls, squeezing yourself into tight corners despite having no one but you around, your body suddenly came into contact of another. You stumbled, nearly falling to the floor until a hand grabbed you and pulled you closer by your arm.

"I get that I'm charming, but really is no need to fall head over heels for me." You looked up and saw a man with bright hair. He was tall, taller than anyone in your family and his colorful outfit choice really made stand out from the boring, nearly barren hallway.

You raised a brow at his words. "Oh please. With how you bumped into me while being in a spacious hallway, I'd say you're the one who's head over heels here." You played along to his sudden flirtatious move, rolling your eyes and flipping off a strand of hair with the back of your hand. "You seemed like the type of guy who'd pay someone just to have a mary sue moment with their crush."

"Oh, you wounded me!" The man cried out dramatically, putting a hand on his chest and letting you go in the process. You were alreayd standing on your two feet and yet you still nearly stumble backwards. "But yeah, maybe I was or maybe I wasn't. I'm Tim, Tim stoker by the way."

Tim offered you his hand and you gladly accepted it, shaking it gently but firmly. "(Name) (Last name), it's nice to meet you, Stoker."

"Please, call me Tim. And the pleasure's all mine." He laughed, winking playfully.

And from that day moving onwards, you and Tim were practically stuck by the hip at every hour of the day. Wherever he went, you were there as well. And wherever you ended up at, Tim was closely following behind you like a unassuming bodyguard with a few tricks up his sleeve.

Oh, Tim's at the police getting evidence for a report? You were there as well, merely for fun and also you can secretly record police officers fucking up for laughs. You're out in the woods for a camping trip, getting wood for fire? There's Tim guarding both of your tents, rehearsing alpha male jokes to tell you when you come back.

It was almost impossible to split the two of you up. Well, almost impossible.

"Hey, (Name). Did you see the email Elias sent to everyone?" Tim called you from across the room, sitting relaxed in his chair while you turn your gaze away from the bright screen of your laptop.

"Hm? No, not yet. Why?" You asked him, despite knowing it was either about you and Tim or random changes being implemented into the Institute.

The bright-haired man struggled to contain his laughter, even bringing up his wrist to bite at his cuffs but even still he wheezed through his teeth. "Hgh— Listen to this!" Tim coughed, breathing in before displaying a poor impression of Elias.

"May I remind everyone that bringing in alocholic beverages are strictly prohibited in the archives, as well as bringing in any lighters or any item alike that could potentially set fire to 'important materials'. Sincerely, Elias Bouchard."

You raised your brow in amusement, chuckling all the while Tim stopped himself from bursting into laughter when he was impersonating Elias. "Is that so? Surely, no one has been bringing in alcohol or lighters into the archives. Right, Tim?" You teased, poking him with your words as to hint him to cough off his crimes.

Tim composed himself. "Yes... No, of course not. I mean, that would be stupid, wouldn't it?" He sighed, leaning on the office chair. "But... If you hide it well enough, then it's not so stupid anymore." He grinned mischievously, pulling out a flask from his pockets. It looked a lot like a calculator in his hands rather than a little alcoholic bottle as the metal shimmered under the buzzing, yellow-ish lights.

As he shook it, he didn't realized the looming shadow over him until you divert your eyes from his form and hold back a snicker. Tim looked at you with confusion, closw to saying something before he turned and saw no other than Elias' percing pale blue eyes.

"Is that so, Tim?" Elias spoke callously, though a wide smile was attached to his face, stretching skin across his facial bones like plastic covering. "Why don't you meet me in my office for a little chat, wouldn't that be lovely?"

Tim shrinks in his seat, averting his gaze down to the ground. "Yes. of course, sir."

You watch in half amusement, half concern as Tim is dragged out of the office by Elias. A familiar face peeked out of the corner, carrying a tray of tea and donning a blue cloud-patterned sweater.

Martin raised a brow as he settled the tray down. "What just happened?"

You pour some tea for yourself and drink from it, doing a dramatically loud slurping sound before smacking your lips. "The cycle of life, Dear Martin."

notes. this was supposed to be for a request but hhhh i need to fill the space somehow oopsies i'll do the req later maybe

[lisannastraussisanangel]

Absolutely begging you do to a part 3 where they somehow manage to bring Lucy back, I need hugs and celebration my heart can’t handle it

I suppose I can heal the pain I've caused lol

It takes way longer than they planned for fix Lucy. I'm talking a couple years.

Because of this, Lucy has gotten used to floating around and spying on people. So now she has a terrible habit of knocking things over, falling over, and getting way to personal (physically and mentally) with members

It's Lucy who figures out how to come back so she get's the joy of surprising everyone

She goes after Happy first. Revenge is sweet

He's walking home alone from the guild and Lucy sneaks up behind him and grabs him. He screams in pure terror

But then when he sees it's Lucy and she's really there, he buries his face in her chest and starts sobbing.

They sit like that on the street for way to long just hugging

Natsu smells Lucy on Happy when he comes home so Natsu knows she's back (or at least he's hoping his nose isn't lying to him)

He runs out of the house and searches for her (because why wouldn't she go see him next)

Lucy is standing there in the walkway, almost sheepishly. Natsu freezes at first and just stares

It doesn't last long because soon he's tackling her. Lucy tries to be mad at him but she's so happy to be actually touching him that she just giggles as he clutches her tightly

Natsu wasn't able to smell her while she was a ghost so he sniffs her pretty hard, missing her scent (Lucy actually lets him do it too)

Wendy had helped come up with the spell to return Lucy to her body, but hadn't actually been there when Lucy successfully did it

So Wendy is stuck in the library trying to figure out new ways to improve the spell (they had several failed attempts so Wendy was always tweaking things)

Lucy simply comes up and sits on the desk next to her. Wendy is so buried in her research that she doesn't even smell her

She just assumes that its Lucy's 'ghost'. Well, until Lucy snatches the book from her hands

Wendy literally shrieks. I'm talking the loudest, most high pitched scream ever

And Lucy is once again tackled. Giggling all the way to the floor

Carla had seen it coming so she simply hugged Lucy and welcomed her back to the land of the living

Having heard Wendy's scream, Erza came running into the room. She was so confused when she saw the three women on the ground giggling

Lucy stood quickly and walked up to Erza. Erza was skeptical of what Lucy would do (ghost Lucy is a bit of a menace)

Without a word, Lucy pulled Erza into the tightest hug known to man

Well, she thought it was a tight hug, until Erza hugged her back and nearly broke all her ribs

Lucy had to tap out of it, but held Erza's hand the rest of the day

Erza didn't cry then, but that night she was the first to go to Lucy's house and cried into her arms about how much she missed her

The rest of the team showed up at Lucy's apartment that night. Something they had been doing since Lucy first turned into a 'ghost' (they figured they should make use of Lucy's space since they were paying the rent)

Everyone apart from Gray knew Lucy was physically back. So while they are all chatting, Gray tries to walk through Lucy (a habit he picked up because she kept trying to block his paths to things)

He ran straight into her and nearly slammed her into the doorframe. Lucy yelled at him because wth and then realized "oh shit, we didn't tell Gray"

He freaked out and lifted her off the ground as he hugged her.

He tried not to cry, but Lucy started bawling instead because now her could touch her whole team. This caused Gray to cry as well

Pretty soon everyone was crying all over again and Lucy was pulled into a group hug

They all cuddled her that night as well. No one wanted to take their hands off her for fear that she would disappear again

(Also Gray was pissed that everyone knew besides him and didn't say anything... there was a fight)

[inlovewithcharmers]

Never in my life would I have thought to do this to a harry styles fan but they insulted everyone besides Joe Keery in the cast even though Gaten is literally on Broadway rn and they called MY BBG SEASON 3 TRASH- like don't act like seeing Steve harrington in a skirt was the best thing you have gotten to see. PLUS DACRE :((((( NO ONE GIVES HIM ENOUGH CREDIT FOR THIS SHIIIIIITTTTT HES SO TALENTED LIKE HE LITERALLY MADE PART OF HIMSELF CRY WHILE ACTING AS FLAYED BILLY.....

like girl......

Eduardo.....as soon as I seen the musical of everyone getting high I was genuinely scared....but Mike's beef with him is hilarious lmaoooooo.

I also love how they changed Charlie's character into being funny.....At first I was like I don't like how he stalks people like that?- but Steve s1 was an ass more than he was so I forgave him. He did a really great job changing his character a bit.

Caleb, HIM AND SADIE ARE JUST🫨🤯💣 THOSE DANCE MOVES TOO THOUUUGH. THE SWAGGIEST OUT OF ALL THE CAST (Don't tell Joe I said that, especially Djo)

Finn is so amazing in mystery horror movies and series you don't even know- he can also sing so like WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT? HES SO SWEET. THE SWEETEST BEAN EVEEERRR. HES THE REASON WHY I EVEN GOT INTO IT SO MUCH. I LOVE HIIIMMMM.

Gaten :)))) The talent My grandparents are so sucked into this show and literally have 7 to see him on Broadway but just don't want to drive💀 like HIS SINGING WOULD BE IMPOSSIBLE TO MISS OUT ON. JAMIE WOULD BE SO PROUD OF HIM BRUH-

You sound like you only know one person that can sing and that's it? You are so wrong for that.

MILLIE DESERVES THE WORLD, SHE HAS A BOOK COMING OUT UNLIKE THE REST OF THEM.....Hell, she's living my dream talking to Winona writer and Henry Cavil. SHE. IS. LITERALLY. BESTIES. WITH. A. HOT. MAN. (Noah taking notes✍️) Not to mention this girl can rap like Ice spice who? No that's eleven spices. HIM AND DAVIDS FATHER DAUGHTER DUO IS SO ICONIC.

NOAH SLAYYYYYED THIS SHOWWW. OMFG WHERE DO I START?- When it was just us old byler stans. This man made us livid in a good way tbh. Finns my favorite ally, and noah not to sound homophobic 🙄 but he's my 3rd or 4th favorite LGBTQ bestie idk man Sadie's just so🦁 Rawr you know what I mean? I CRIED WHEN WILL HAD THAT BREAKDOWN IN SEASON 3 I WAS SOBBING. OUR POOR WILL :(

Jaime omfg. If you say this man is shit, sis we going to fight to the death. Jaime as Jace was a masterpiece. HE FITS THAT KIND OF VIBE SO WELL I LOVE IT. ALSO HE WAS IN TWILIGHT ❤️

JOSEPH, :) IF YOU HAVE ANYTHING BAD TO SAY ABOUT THIS MAN I DONT WANT TO HEAR IT.... normal mean directors cut you off what did they end up doing? LETTING HIM IMPROV A LOT OHHH MYYY THE THOUGHT OF THOSE GUITAR SKILLS😯 I nearly slapped myself when I found out my birthday is right after his.......PLUS JAIMIE IS HIS BEST FRIEND WTF?!! MY ALMOST BIRTHDAY TWIN GETS A FRIEND LOOKING LIKE THAT AND THE ONLY THING I GOT MORE THAN FRIENDS WAS HOSPITAL VISITS?!!!! I CANT WAIT TO SEE HIM IN THE QUIET PLACE TOOOO IM SO EXCITED.

SADIE IS FR A GODESS.🛐 She carried 2022 on her back. WAS AMAZING IN FEAR STREET. BREATHED DYLAN O'BRIENS AIR. I WOULD'VE FELT LIKE I WAS DIEING MAN WTH?. Not to mention the fact that her and dacre are my fav 2 duo in the show. I LOVE THEM. YOU INSULT OUR GINGER QUEEN WE RIDE AT DAWN.

Natalie, sure her character in season one was a little annoying and was pretty much a personality copycat to a shameless character, but THE CHEMISTRY OMFG. IF JOE KEERY LOOKED AT ME LIKE THAT- girl bye. WHO CAN EVEN SAY NO TO THAT JAWLINE LIKE DAMN GIRL?- D A M N.

Pryiah is my favorite girl boss d&d player feminist btw so if you mess with her ill literally hunt you down.

[mythiccheroacademia]

Can you please do a fic where kirishima and kaminari turning into babies and reader have to take care of them but kaminari dont like reader for some strange reason and them resolved it🤩 sorry for bad English 😅

A/N: this was such a cute request! the characters as babies just makes my heart 😚🥰😍 I hope y’all enjoy this one! and your english is great btw!

Warnings: cuteness overload? and some cussing bc bakugo’s here. what do you expect?

Kirishima Eijirou: 

when you woke up to bakugo banging on your door, you knew it was going to be a weird day 

bakugo was notrious for being an early bird, but he usually kept that to himself. so why was he screaming outside your door at 6 in the freaking morning?

“y/n! you have ten seconds to open this fucking door before i—“

you swung the door open with the meanest glare you could muster, ready to cuss him out

“what the hell do you want—“

your voice catches in your throat when you see a sleeping black haired child, no older than two, curled up in his arms 

you stare at the baby

then you stare at bakugo

bakugo stares back in confusion

then it clicks

“IT’S NOT MY FUCKING BABY!!” he explodes

“LANGUAGE BAKUGO!”

“STOP FUC--I MEAN FREAKING ASSUMING THINGS”

you didnt get a chance to respond before he shoves the baby in your arms and tells you it’s kirishima who got hit by a quirk during his internship 

the teachers knew and left him with katsuki, but he couldnt take care of him today bc he had to go to his intership, and he didnt trust anyone else with the child

so that’s how you ended up alone with baby kiripima 🥺

you find out very quickly that kirishima was as energetic as ever, even as a baby 

the minute he wakes up, he nearly jumps out of bed and declares to the entire room 

“g’ mornin’!” 

then he glomps you with the biggest hug 

“y/n! we swol too-day!!”

you figured out that he knows who you are but that’s the extent to which he does 

either way, he’s very excited to spend the day with you 

he’s still extroverted even as a kid and loves being around his friends

when you took him around to meet everybody, he just gobbled up the attention. most importantly, he just loved your attention

he such a show off for you omg 

he’ll be “ultra manly” and clean his mess all by himself 

or when you try and help him wash his hands, he’ll stop you with a determined pout and go “i can do it!” and concentrate really hard on scrubbing his hands clean 

when you’d praise him for eating all his food he’d give you the biggest shark-tooth smile and cutely blush from your words

he still kind of stumbled when he walked but whenever he saw something cool, he’d take your hand and basically drag you with him, excitment in his steps 

and when you showed him the gym?

he was in L O V E 🤩

you may or may not have taken a couple pictures when you saw him attempt to lift a five pound weight 

bath time is fun and easy bc he’s too busy pretending to be a shark to really think about the fact that he’s getting clean

when you tell him it’s bed time, he doesn’t wanna sleep at first. but then you make a sad face and he instantly drops what he’s doing and hurriedly says,

“okay! okay! i sleep! see!?”

goes and gets his blanket and curls up in your bed bc he’s the goodest boy and it’s unmanly to make a pretty person sad!

he looks so small and fluffy that you literally wanna bawl your eyes out 

ahhh he’s just the cutest!!

you lie next to him and decide to take a nap too bc it’s been a long day 

before you fall asleep, you feel the small boy nuzzle into your chest and wrap his arms around your neck 

“night night. luh you,” he whispers before he starts to snore 

like 🥺🥺🥺

you could seriosuly die happy 

the next day, you wake up with a heavier arm around your shoulders. it’s so heavy that you can barely move and it confuses you 

when you open your eyes, you see that kirishima has gone back to normal 

and usually you’d be freaking out bc you may or may not have a small crush on him and now that he was normal sized, you were staunchly reminded of it

but when he pulls you in closer to his embrace, you can’t seem to care rn

for now, you’ll just enjoy this moment

Kaminari Denki:

“Y/N!! watch out!”

you were all kinds of confused when kaminari jumped in front of you to protect you from a villain’s quirk and he disappeared

and just when you were about to freak out, you heard small whimpers and cries 

you looked to the ground and saw that kaminari hadnt disappeared

your best friend just turned into a freaking two year old child 

and you dont think he likes you 

at all 

once you two were brought to safety, it was like denki finally took a good look at who was holding him and just

flipped shit 

he gives you a firm (but cute) frown that makes you blink in confusion

then he suddenly pushes his hands against your chest to try and get away 

“no! stop! i wanna go!”

at first, you thought he was scared so you attempted to soothe him but it’s no use

he’s admant on throwing his tiny temper tantrum

although, when recovery girl takes him to go get checked, he instantly calms down and smiles as she tells him how cute he his 

you can’t say you didnt feel your heart break just a little 💔💔💔

but youre determined to win over his affection bc wth? you’re supposed to be best friends! 

(read: you had a crush on older denki and you couldnt handle the fact that these might be his true feelings towards you and he might actually not like you)

so the entire day, you’re doing everything you can to make the kid at least acknowledge you 

right now, it’s the bakusquad that’s collectively taking care of him for the day, but you’re there to help

you try to tell him jokes babies could understand and he’ll just look at you and turn away 

mina told you that food was the best way to a guy’s heart so you made him his favorite (soft) food as a peace offering

and you were absolutely crushed when he stiffened up and refused to eat it until bakugo scared him into eating 

he turns away and you just 💔😞

after that, you sighed and gave up

you sorrowfully accepted the fact that denki just didnt like you :(

at least you now know your chances of being with him was nonexistent

you made up some excuse to leave the room bc you coudlnt take the heartbreak

everyone pretty much bought into it

all except denki who might have been a child, but he was still as perceptive as ever 

unbeknowest to you, denki didnt really dislike you 

the reason he was acting like a jerk was bc you put yourself in danger during the mission and he was so angry about it 

he didnt know how to confront these feelings so he just ignored you 

but when he saw the silver tears line your eyes, he felt so bad 😭

he didn’t know how to emotion™️

pls don’t leave him :(((

the emotions overwhelmed him so much to the point that he bursted out in tears and wasn’t cosoled by anything 

“come on, bro! what’s wrong!?” sero anxiously asked 

“y/n! i want y/n!”

he didnt have to say it twice 

the group basically shove him in your arms and youre confused when denki latches onto you like a life line bc did he just hate you three seconds ago?

despite your saddness, you comfort him by whispering sweet nothings in his ear and denki is instaneously consoled solely by your voice 

the crying takes a lot of energy from him and he can barely keep his eyes open

but before he sleeps, he softly says, “i wa’ scare-d. sowwy y/n”

again, you’re confused, but you were too tired to think about it so you decide to go to bed and deal with this tomorrow

it’s the next day and your face-to-face with a normal kaminari who’s obviously been awake for some time and looks petrified 

now that he’s older, you’re reminded of everything he put you through and you’re salty af about it

“you still hate me?” you sassily say 

denki’s face erupts in an embarrassed blush and youre surprised when he buries his head in your neck, holding you close to his chest 

without looking at you, he explains his true feelings for you in a really round about way

you pull his face back to look at him and as he sputters out apologies to you, you kiss is nose 

“you idiot. i like you too if that’s what you’re trying to say.”

denki stares before short-circuting and you just laugh as he mumbles happily to himself 

[kenjikutie]

summary: you and kageyama had made many promises to one another, but, perhaps the king doesn’t need a princess after all word count: 2k warnings: none! just a lot of angst pairing: kageyama tobio x fem!reader

you would always remember your first day of middle school. that was the day that you decided your older brother would forever be the bane of your existence. not only had he left you at home without waking you up but, he had also begun his walk without you, leaving you to navigate your way through the bustling streets of japan

with every step you took, you swore that your lungs were about to give out. you still had no idea how tooru did this every day and stayed after school for volleyball practice. maybe you could put shaving cream in his pillow or hide his sports sneakers as revenge for leaving you all alone, but, he had gotten you the coveted manager position for his team, so, that was something he could hold over your head for months to come

so lost in your thoughts of revenge, you didn’t notice that you had slowed down to a nearly crawling speed, causing the person behind you to knock right into your back, sending you flying to the concrete, papers and books scattering all around, getting trampled by the passerby

“i- i’m sorry!”, a small voice cried out, reaching down to lift you off of the ground and awkwardly dust off your shoulder

you giggled and ran a hand through your hair, holding up your hands, “no, it’s okay! i promise.”

judging by his uniform, he was also a first year in middle school and you were certain you had never seen someone look so nervous. maybe he was lost like you were. there was a pale blush on his face, one which only grew deeper when you walked up to him, curiously leaning inward

“what’s your name?”, you hadn’t even noticed how close the two of you were 

you had always been a bubbly person, just like your elder brother. personal space had never been a phrase in your vocabulary and it had been fine that way in elementary school, but you supposed it was time for you to mature a little bit. after all, curiosity did kill the cat

backing up, you held out your hand for him to shake, “i’m oikawa y/n! im a first year, too!”

still, the boy said nothing, clearly too frazzled to open his mouth. with a soft laugh, you picked up the books and papers you had dropped, not minding that he didn’t help. when you came back up from the ground, you noticed that he hadn’t moved at all

taking his hand in yours, you began to run in the direction of your middle school, ignoring his surprised gasp and quiet protests. eventually, he relaxed in your grip and ran beside you, instead of letting you drag him around like a ragdoll

quietly, kageyama snuck a glance at your face, feeling the godforsaken blush from earlier creep it’s way back up his neck. you had to have been the prettiest girl he had ever seen in his short lifespan. no, scratch that- you were the prettiest girl anyone could ever see-

he was almost sad when the two of you reached the gate of kitagawa first. your hand quickly untangled itself from his and you turned to him with a wide grin. kageyama swore his heart had never beaten so fast

“i’ll see you later! thanks for running with me.”, before you could turn around, he clutched onto your jacket, effectively stopping you

“k-kageyama tobio.”, he let out a shaky sigh, “that’s my name.”

after that encounter, you became what kageyama tobio would consider to be his closest friend. each day, there would be a pouch of yogurt or a carton of strawberry milk sitting on your desk, a desk specifically chosen by you due to it’s location-right behind kageyama’s head-

you loved to annoy him during class by poking him with your pencil or slipping notes into the hood of his jacket for him to find later. kageyama would never tell you that he kept them all in a small box on his dresser

during his first year, kageyama knew that you were the only reason he stayed on the volleyball team. anytime your brother teased him, you were jumping on his case, pulling his hair and whining for him to not bully your best friend. oikawa would just ruffle your hair and begin to tease you about having a little crush

kageyama didn’t like that. he didn’t like the idea of you having feelings or even a close friendship wth someone that wasn’t him. you were the only person he felt he could go to when he was overwhelmed, the only that would lay with him and watch clouds on the weekends and the only one who would stay in the gym with him until the late hours of the night to toss volleyballs

“hey, yn? you’re still gonna be my best friend in high school, right?”, kageyama had asked as the two of you sat on the gym steps, quietly sipping from your waterbottles

you quirked a brow, wondering where that question had come from, “of course i am, tobio! do you really think i would leave you all alone?”

kageyama went quiet and you worried that you had said something wrong. without thinking, you reached over and grabbed his hand, feeling him tense under your hold. you could have sworn that his cheeks turned bright red as soon as your fingers grazed one another

so, you sat there underneath the moonlight, feeling your heart begin to beat a little bit faster when your best friend intertwined his fingers with yours, slightly squeezing

but, that connection all changed one quiet, fall day in third year. that was the first time a pouch of yogurt didn’t show up on your desk. you had matured a lot since the first day you met kageyama. you weren’t as curious as before and certainly not as naive

you knew that kageyama and you had lost touch and that things weren’t the same as before. after you quit managing for the volleyball team, late night meetings stopped and hanging out together for lunch was pushed aside for extra practice. it was beginning to drive you crazy

to fill the void left by kageyama, you started to hang out more with the other third years, such as kunimi and kindaichi. but after a while, kunimi began to see the lost look in your eyes whenever you glanced towards kageyama’s locker, only to find him missing

but, the lazy boy didn’t have the heart to tell you what had happened to your old best friend. he couldn’t let you know how kageyama screamed at them, how he slammed balls on the court out of frustration, how he had become the king

kunimi knew it was only a matter of time until you found out, though. you had always been smarter than anyone he knew. so, it didn’t surprise him when you arrived at their final game of the season, cheeks painted in their school colors and your old manager jacket on your shoulders

standing at the top of the bleachers, you admired the way kageyama looked in his uniform. he was more mature now from the looks of him but you could tell he still drank his milk and yogurt cartons before every game, judging from the amount of them in the trash can

your heart nearly lept out of your chest when he turned to look up at you, your eyes connecting with his blue ones. you weren’t sure what kageyama was thinking about or if he was even happy to see you there but you were sure his eyes widened just a little bit

after about an hour, the game was in full force and you had been exposed to a side of kageyama you had never seen before. your heart beat faster form the crazed, furious look in his eyes anytime he glanced at his teammates and you couldn’t help but wonder what happened to the boy who was lost on your first day of school

but, the worst was yet to come. when kageyama reaches backward for a set, preparing to score the final point, no one came to receive it. the entire arena was silent, as if everyone was afraid to move and you saw kageyama crack like marble

the game ended after that with a final loss for kitagawa first. you exchanged glances with kunimi, noting the lack of expression in his eyes. you assumed that putting kageyama in his place was enough for him to feel satisfied with how their final season ended

kageyama shoved past his teammates, knocking their shoulders so hard you thought they might fall over. quickly gathering your things, you sprinted down the stairs of the bleachers and towards where you had seen him leave

you skid to a stop when you saw his back, frozen where he stood, fists clenched so tightly he may burst blood vessels. your eyes softened at how tense his shoulders were and you so badly wanted to reach out and help him, but that wasn’t your place anymore

as you took one step forward, kageyama turned to face you, a glaring look in his eyes that made you shiver, “what the hell are you doing here?”

the phrase was a snarl

“i...i wanted to check on you, because-“

“because you feel sorry for me? i don’t need your pity and i don’t want it either!”

running a hand through your hair, you shook your head and glanced up at him, “i don’t pity you. i just wanted to help you...”

kageyama rolled his eyes and chucked the volleyball in his hand at the wall, not even flinching as the sound echoed through the hall. you, however, jolted at the action and took a step back

“what happened to you?”, your voice was barely a whisper

his eyes flared as he turned to face you, “what happened to me? are you serious? what about you, huh? quitting the manager job even though you loved it! you changed everything about who you are!”

you were starting to get angrier; you could feel it in your gut, “i grew up, kageyama! maybe you should try it and stop acting like an arrogant brat!”

kageyama nearly pouted when he heard you call him by his surname. you hadn’t used it for the whole time he knew you. maybe he really had messed everything up this time, but it was too late for apologies now

“i don’t need to explain anything to you! i never even cared about you in the first place! you were always annoying. clinging to my sleeve like some child.”

your eyes were beginning to fill with tears and kageyama felt like he had been punched in the gut when a few rolled down your cheeks. stop it, he told himself. you’re screwing it all up! don’t lost her like this! but he wouldn’t listen, not even to himself

wiping at your eyes with your sleeve, you sniffled then flares up at the boy you used to call your favorite person in the world

“you know what? you’re the king now, great job! you’re the greatest player on the team. but, you’re also the worst human being i’ve met! you care abut no one but yourself and only think about your own future, disregarding everyone else who tries to help you!”

kageyama had never seen you this angry and it terrified him. perhaps, some part of him always thought you would come back to him, sit with him on the gym steps again and count the stars in the sky as he rested his head on your shoulder but that was all gone now

“so im done, kageyama. stay away from me, got it?”

as soon as you turned around, he reached out for you, pulling his arm back as soon as it left his side. why had it had to happen like this? why was he so selfish? if only he had accepted your help, then he still would have had you by his side

maybe he would get another chance one day. if the world allowed him, he would reincarnate as someone who could love you the way you deserved. someone who didn’t push you away, and just maybe... you could love one another again

“hi, im kageyama tobio. it’s nice to meet you.”

“im oikawa yn! it’s nice to meet you too!”

[purplerose244]

My thoughts on Seabound!!! 🌊🌊🌊 (2/4)

SPOILERS ALERT!!!

For now, nothing to complain about! We got Nya, we got MAYA AND RAY, we got GILES PANTON BACK A LEGO SHOW!!! 😍😍😍

Of course now I'm definitely curious about what the story is really about, like I'm guessing Wojira will wake up at some point so... Great Devourer all over again maybe? 😅 Idk, for now I just wanna enjoy Nya having her moment 🥳

Alright, here we go!

GENERAL THOUGHTS

New alert for reader, during the Nexo Knights period I was and still am the hugest Clay fan. Now that his voice is in this season I might scream more than necessary... keep that in mind 😅

I love the humor in this, all random but still kinda clever 😂😂 Maybe I'm biased because I love Jay but still 🤷‍♀️

I really like the design of the marine world, very cool!! 🌊🌊🌊

I guess I'm not really seeing any big plot twist moment for now? Ninjago seasons have history of basing seasons on a "we need to prevent this event from happening but it will happen anyway", so I can see Wojira waking up no matter what 🤷‍♀️

I wonder if that will be shocking? Usually when this situation happen, someone makes a major sacrifice (Zane with the Overlord, sensei Garmaron with Chen, again sensei G with the Preeminent...). Maybe Maya? I DON'T WANT THAT 😭 But I am curious, everything is going nicely and I'm not sure what it will bring! 🤩 I'M EXCITED SO LET'S GO!!!

THE WRATH OF KALMAAR

So this is the name of Clay's new incarnation, neat! 👍

Okay really, for having a season lately the main character just can't help but be trapped by the villain: kinda Zane in the ICE Chapter, Jay in Prime Empire, Cole in Master of the Mountain... we can call it a tradition at this point 🤷‍♀️

Giant serpent, yadda yadda, I wonder if we're gonna address the Great Devourer at some point? Not mandatory, but the reference would be very cool 🤩

Clay's new incarnation is a prince I- *hyperventilates in awe*

Nya playing dumb lol, I don't know if that's personal experience as she used to get kidnapped a lot in the past or she just have too many idiots in her life 😂

ALSO ANOTHER BEST GIRL'S SMIRK

NYA YOU'RE TOO MUCH ILY ❤💙❤💙

Jay I love that you're so worried about Nya but maybe try NOT TO DIE? YOU'RE WITH LLOYD AND ZANE YET YOU'RE THE ONE GOING FOR THE SACRIFICE WTH?? 😱 But he's worried about his cool GF I kinda get it, also he didn't do it so good...

WHAT. THE. HECK.

WHO ARE YOU OH MY FIRST SPINJITZU MASTER YOU'RE ADORABLE I WANNA KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU YOU ABSOLUTE CUTIE 🤩🤩🤩

So Giles is doomed to voice LEGO characters with daddy issues 😂 That being not having a dad at all or having one that is... a good guy? Idk he seems chill with the surface at first glance, I wonder what's the story of this family

Maya reminds of my mom, she also mentions her work a lot and I study the same thing. But she doesn't want to brag, it gets annoying but she just wants to give me advice. It's nice to see actually 👍 Also Ray reference NEAT ❤❤❤

Wow, if any child-parent couple of this show was doomed at going semi Emperor's New Groove style, I would've bet on Ed and Jay honestly 😅

Oh HECK yes I knew that with my water girls things were BOUND to get cool 😎 ... yeah I know where the door is *goes away*

JAY NO WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT TRYING TO DIE STOP DOING WHAT YOU'RE DOING!!! 😱😱😱

My GOSH that scared the crap out of me 😅 Jay honey we have too many deaths in this team, you're not helping... BUT YOU POWERED AN ENTIRE SHIP BECAUSE YOU LOVE NYA AND YOU DIDN'T DIE AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BLUEBELL 💙💙💙

They were all so worried, I love this ninja family so freaking much 💜💜💜 Also better not tell this one to his GF 😂

And Bluebell?

Welcome to the "change eye color because of elemental power" team! WE GOT ANOTHER ONE I LOVE WHEN IT HAPPENS!!! 😍😍😍

Awww, Zane letting Jay be the captain, that was so cute of him 💕

Another great episode! Doing great so far but I still wonder if we got into the main story. Feels like there should be more, well we got time! Next one! 😊

LONG LIVE THE KING

Sooooo... that's one very telling title 😅 If we're going full Lion King on this one, I think I know where this is going 😵

Maya: Don't they know that metal taste terrible?!? (Again feels like Kai could say something like this 😂)

FINALLY NYA USING FREAKING WATER POWERS UNDER THE SEA!!! Thank you Maya for saying out loud what we were all thinking 👌👌

NINJA TO THE RESCUE!!!

Pff, okay, the fact that Kalmaar is all evil and cruel and then he gets startled like that, it's kind or adorable! 💕 Honestly Giles got such a deep voice, with Clay it was firm warm and reassuring, here we got plain devious and I ADORE it 😍😍😍

Maya come on don't doubt your daughter 😅 But I like her, and if she knew Nya they way we all do she wouldn't doubt that she could make it every time 😎

Yeah I was right, the king seems chill... oww I fear what's coming then 😳

Okay, so Kalmaar thinks that the world should go back to be lead by them like in the past, while the king just wants peace with the surface. And as we know, no drama no season so...

Yep, saw the death coming 😅

WHOA DID NOT SEE THAT LITTLE BLAME ACT COMING KALMAAR IS SO EVIL!!!... with a glorious voice but still (Rose focus on something that is not that godlike voice, you can do it 💪💪)

THE OLD ONE TWO I LOVE THIS SO MUCH COMBO ATTACK!!! 🌊❄🌊❄

Awww Benthomaar is actually really cute, he's so worried about his father 😢 And he's adopted apparently? I wanna know the story!!! 🤩🤩

Yep, there's the reason why Zane got a mask even though he doesn't need one, it completes his attire 😂😂😂 My gosh how I love this nindroid ❄

Did... did Jay just say phooey? Dude Ducktales ended a while ago but I'm still not over it 😭

I said it once before I'll say it again, Ninjago is really REALLY good at making death scenes. Like, omg, I genuinely felt sorry for them 😢😢 I also really liked that the king didn't ask to be avenged, he still wanted peace and he asked his son to protect the ninja and he cried actual tears...

MY HEART WTH 😭😭😭 So we're adding this to the real tears moments of the show, with Jay crying over pie, Zane with the flashback of his dad, Jay crying over Nya and Lloyd thinking the ninja are gone... my world this show is angsty 🙂

Third startle for prince Kalmaar, I love the gag 😂 Oh wait, king Kalmaar 🤷‍♀️

Okay, we got a coup, the ninja running away because they got framed, Benthomaar is most likely going to join them or at least help them, I guess Wojira will come out at some point while... Kai, Ray and Cole are still playing videogames? 😅

THIS IS GETTING COOL I WONDER WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT AAAAHHH HECK YES THERE IS THE HYPE!!! 😍😍😍

Although I hope we get more stuff with Nya and Maya, that's what I like 🤩

ESCAPE FROM MERLOPIA

I'm good at English and I can follow most of it, but the fantasy names are tricky so I didn't get before that this was the name of the place 😅 It's nice, at least it's not another Atlantis 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

LLOYD I SWEAR TO YOUR GRANDPA IF YOU TRY TO DIE AGAIN 😱

NYA YOU ARE NOT A GOOD SUBSTITUTE NONE OF YOU ARE OMG 😱😱

Ah, there he is, my new son Benthomaar 💙 He is so lovable already, I know nearly nothing about him and I like his character already a lot! He could relate with all of the ninja really, but maybe with Jay the most? They were both adopted after all 🤔🤔

*scribble note for a fanfic for later if this doesn't come up in the season*

Alright moving on 😗

I am so happy Nya gets a season, Kelly got a great emotional range that doesn't come out often in my opinion, but with a full introspection of water goddess we are all blessed by her voice acting 😍

Gotta say, admitting that Bentho didn't have to help them to answer the usual 'Can we trust him' question is pretty reasonable, like, better than other stupid answers 😅

Also don't mind me

Just screenshotting by ship 💙❤💙❤

Somehow lately we are letting Jay do the talking and I both hate and LOVE the fact 😂😂 Plain Bluebell nonsense, heck yes that's my jam👌👌

MAYA IS SO COOL OMG 🤩🤩

I literally can't not laugh at the startle gag with Kalmaar 😂

LLOYD WHAT DID I JUST SAY ABOUT SELF SACRIFICING!! PLEASE IT'S NOT EVEN YOUR SEASON!! 😱😱😱😱

Aww Jay is still the Captain, nice! Wonder if it's giving him Skybound flashbacks... I hope not considering all he went through that time, poor Sparky 😅😅

ARE THOSE LITTLE WU ROCKETS?? 🤯

Can we skip a season and hang out with Pixal one time? I really wanna know how she organizes her free time to create these things 😍😍😍

THANK YOU LLOYD FOR NOT DYING ONCE AGAIN, MUCH APPRECIATED!!! 💚💚💚 My green bean needs a vacation... they all do 😅

THEY ARE

SO BEAUTIFUL 💙🌊💙🌊

Alright, back to the island hoping Kalmaar will not track us and follow us so he can get to the place and discover the amulet 🙂

Are we not calling the others? I miss my flame babe and Rocky ❤🖤❤🖤 Also RAY WATCHA DOIN I WANNA KNOW EVERYTHING 🤩🤩

THE TALE OF BENTHOMAAR

Wait what? Shark boy backstory? SHARK BOY BACKSTORY?!? 👀👀👀

Wow, I see that Kalmaar didn't change a thing growing up, still the same gonna-be-a-villain 😂 Of course his voice got a lot deeper and cool and okay you know I love his voice moving on

I find it kinda funny that Kalmaar is so focused on royal blood and superiority, while Clay was basically a farm boy who worked his way up. Giles knows how to get the character no matter what 😍

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

BABY BENTHOMAAR AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

The king seems like such a good pers- fish- creature 😅 Now I'm double sad that he died, my world, why do I always care so fast, it's not healthy in this show where everyone could die 😰😰

I'M SORRY IS THAT KAI'S HAIR??? 😂😂😂 I LITERALLY CAN'T LOOK AWAY WTH I DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS

Literally every frame of Benthomaar makes me love him even more 😢

Interesting that we got an academic villain, he kinda reminds me of Clouse in a way, maybe even Harumi since she studied her way to her plan as well? I like that we got a bit of personality too!

Using your little bro for your own purpose... it's very evil but kinda also brotherly like 😂

Benthomaar really gives me that very PRECIOUS vibe, kinda the perfect son but also a naive and unaware BABY 💙

LEGO HUG 🤩🤩 Not exactly reciprocated but still 😅

Ooohhh, so this is how he found the temple! I like this, it shows that Bentho is most likely physically stronger than Kalmaar, while evil brother is focused on brain and studies. They are planned differently, I like it! 😚😚

Ouch, peer pressure... sibling pressure? Eh you get what I mean 😂

POOR BENTHO 😭😭😭 YOU GOT THE NINJA NOW DON'T WORRY WE'RE NEVER GONNA LEAVE YOU ALONE YOU PRECIOUS SHARK BABY!! 🦈🦈🦈

Bentho: will I really fit in with you guys? Do you really understand how I feel?

Lloyd: Jay was adopted, Nya's parents were gone most of her life, Zane lost his father while mine turned evil

Bentho(tearing up): yeah that can work

Okaaaaayyyyy, I like that we got a bit of backstory for Bentho too! We didn't get much for Vanya in Master of the Mountain, which is the only thing I was sad about (very little detail, AMAZING season 🖤🖤🖤), nice to see it here!!

But I really want more Nya and Maya interactions, I hope we'll soon get to them again!! 😍😍😍

Alright, getting somewhere here! I'm very curious about what's next 🤩🤩

[mellorad]

how dare, who told the writing team of LiS it was okay to come into my household and chop onions on this fine day

[dj-yukio]

I found an unfinished fic from almost two years ago wtf

since I’m never finishing it (I didn’t even know it existed until know like wth), I’ll just put it up here

Chain reaction

The first thought she had after colliding headfirst into the floor was ‘Ow!’

The second thought she had was the numerous situations that had led to them crashing into the ground, complete with curses that just ran through her mind as she rubbed her head.

Really, it had all started when those two lapis lazulis first came to Earth.

Of course, that by itself hadn’t raised any eyebrows. Even after narrowly escaping the end of the world caused by an angry spinel that nearly killed them (and almost caused Peridot to lose her character development, not that she wouldn’t have gained it back, but still) , the Earth remained a great vacation place for home world gems looking to escape the stress of work, especially after Steven had made the diamonds lax most of the rules and regulations and laws and whatnot that had been in place for era 1 and era 2. It wasn’t even when those two looked at her Lapis-the crystal gem Lapis(she didn’t mean it the possessive way, Peridot swore, she meant it in the ‘I recognise this particular lapis’ way, but now that the thought had surfaced it was staying at the back of Lapis’ mind even though she didn’t quite mind the distinction now), promptly recognised her, and then proceeded to have to reintroduce themselves to her before becoming fast friends with their Lapis.

No, it was only when they briefly looked at Peridot with contempt before being all smiles that Peridot had considered the small possibility that maybe, just maybe, they weren’t as nice as they seemed.

And thankfully, Lapis had listened. Sure, she had been a little offended at the thought that her friends —two lapis lazulis who she had been able to relate to, joke around with inside jokes from a thousand years—would potentially harm them, she hadn’t thrown a fit, instead figuring that Peridot had a point given what happened with Navy (oh that Ruby still made her mad, but she had been right then, so who was to say that it wouldn’t happen now? Although, given that this was era 3 and not era 2... but still a valid scenario.

(It wasn’t that Peridot was worried, haha, but seriously she had yet to recover from the whole trauma of seeing her barnmate uproot everything she had known and loved since coming to Earth out of said Earth, aside from Pumpkin, and then proceeded to fly away with the barn out of the atmosphere. Sure, Lapis had apologised, profusely if she may add, Peridot had forgiven, and both understood where the other was coming from, but such a thing wasn’t something that one just forgets, like keys. The last thing the green gem needed was to find out that Lapis had left again, even though both gems knew it was never happening, but fear was an irrational, irrational thing, so it had of course seemed like a threat that she shouldn’t have even considered)

So as a compromise, they had agreed at first to get Steven to come along with them, before settling for Connie when he couldn’t make it for at least ten different reasons.

(“Wow, thanks guys. Feeling real appreciated here.”

“Yeah, you should feel appreciated!”

For some reason, Lapis felt like Connie was only smiling out of pure politeness for Peridot at that moment.)

Which had then led to the Crystal Temps being formed once again.

“Ok! Okay we’re listening, just don’t hurt her!”

Or at least, it would have been a tactical retreat.

Only, Lapis had frozen up at the sight of Malachite 2.0.

Her eyes had widened, and she was shaking as she stared up at the three gem fusion.

And in that moment, as Peridot pushed Lapis out of the way of a punch that would have poofed , maybe even shattered the terrified gem, Lapis wrapped her arms around the other gem to pull her along from the blast radius with their given momentum. It wasn’t really anything intentional, just something she had done out of instinct as all Lapis could see was her small, brave and for once (it better have been only this once) incredibly reckless barnmate before her eyes as they got out of the damage radius.

And in that instant, Lapis could have sworn that she saw a green light flash before her eyes before they fell face flat on the ground.

Which was now why they were rubbing their head from the impact.

“Lapis! Peridot!” Connie’s cries were what got them out of their stupor, the dust cloud making it hard to see through. It was odd, how the dust didn’t get into Lapis’ eyes, and why their surroundings suddenly seemed like it had a tint of cyan instead of yellow.

With a jolt, she lifted her hand to her face, before stopping as she felt something hard covering her eyes. With a flick, it gave out a small thud, and she concluded that she had visors. That wasn’t weird, because Peridot always wore visors. Or was it weird that Lapis had visors on now of all times? She didn’t know why there was something different with her now, but it wasn’t like it was a horrible difference. Just... different. A good different, even. She enjoyed being like this.

And then she remembered about the other gem. Peridot, who had pushed her out of the way. Lapis, who she had pushed out of the way. Both were nowhere to be found.

So she did the only thing conceivable at that moment and called out for the other.

“Lapis? Peridot?”

Her voice quaked as all four of her hands touched her face, and suddenly, finally she understood.

“We fused!”

Then the shock settled in, and two distinct voices rang out, one out of horror and the other out of genuine surprise.

“I fused?!”

“Nevermind that! Run!”

A hand grabbed onto one of her own, and before she knew it, she was being pulled along, barely avoiding another dust storm as Malachite trailed close behind.

Maybe it was because of the sudden stress, or the clear presence of a gem who wanted nothing more than to shatter them, but as they watched the shield start to splinter, the more logical side of her mind took over and started to compartmentalise her thoughts and organise her priorities. There would be a time for both of them to address this entire fusion issue. There would be a time for her to freak out over the sheer insanity of what had just happened and process it properly.

That time was not now.

Step 1: save Connie. Step 2: Escape!

With her now more one track mind, the fusion pushed aside her current concerns as the dust cleared, grabbing onto Connie by the waist and turning tail just as the giant fist smashed though the pink barrier keeping them alive, barely avoiding the blast while her other two arms and feet made a mad dash out of the area, resembling something like an frightened cat, pounding on the ground in a mad canter while holding Connie off the ground above her head. With water wings coming out of her back, her hands and feet gave the ground a hard push as they achieved lift off out of the canyon.

“Ok, so what’s step 3?”

“What step 3?”

“Of course Malachite could fly. She’s got the abilities of two lapis’.

“She’s chasing us she’s chasing us! What do we do now?!”

“I’m Dioptase, nice to meet you.” She shook it hard before letting go. “Now let’s get out of here before we all shatter—!”

“YOU!”

“Eeek!”

Dioptase felt a terror like never before from both of her constituent gems, resolving to fly faster. Ironically, with both of them panicking over the same thing, it helped her put things into perspective. So, Malachite was going to get her. Alright, fine, if it meant Connie would be fine. Wait, that’s not fine, she didn’t want to be captured. She slapped a hand to her face as she tried to sort out her thoughts.

Then Connie pointed at the ground.

“Land there!”

She looked down at where he had pointed at, only to look back at him with a bewildered face.

“In the recycling centre?!”

Whatever metallic item she could control merely pelted against Malachite, like raindrops on a window in a light shower. Insufficient to make a breakthrough.

“This is it. I’m gonna die here, and I haven’t even existed for twenty minutes!”

Dioptase closed her eyes, turning away from her aggressor as all four arms gripped her head.

But the impact never came.

Instead, a thud rang out. Followed by a grunt as something seemed to have pushed Malachite back.

With one hand frantically moving about her body, the fusion could still feel her form, which meant that they hadn’t shattered after all. A dark shadow looked over them, like something bigger than Malachite had blocked out the sun momentarily from her.

Connie answered the question in her head first as she peeked an eye open.

“Gasp...! Giant metal hands!”

“Holy smokes! I’ve got giant metal arms?!”

“Rargh! You cowards!

The metallic arms moved in response as she waved them around, fluid like water and yet maintaining the same strength as metal. Sparks flew as both hands clapped together in response to the gem clasping her hands together in excitement.

Dioptase could kiss Peridot and Lapis in gratitude.

“BUT I DON’T KNOW WHAT I’M DOING??”

“Oh, and I’m sure you’re hurting her as well! I’m the only one that can handle you, Lapis!”

All she knew that she wanted was for Jasper to leave.

And with a quick swipe, she slapped the giant fusion with a metallic hand, the other forming a fist as she pulled it back.

“Leave us alone!”

The next thing they knew, a cry rang out after Dioptase punched Malachite from the ground, sending the other fusion flying in a bright spark somewhere far away.

“How did you know that that would work though? Like,” Dioptase gestured at the walls of the recycling centre, some of which had been torn apart and was part of the giant metal puddle on the ground, “that. I didn’t even know what we were doing! Well, I did, but you get the idea.”

——————————————————————————————————

Cut out parts

“And finally, authority.” Jasper gestured to herself. “Power and intelligence means nothing if you can’t control your subordinates. I can do it, play the bad guy each time someone steps out of line. Order needs to be maintained by those with authority. That’s how society works, for every gem to have a purpose. What’s the use of a purposeless gem?”

“We could shape home world into a society of what we want. We’ll be respected and have our statuses back. We’ll be the ones making the rules, conquering the planets. We can even leave this rock alone.”

“I know. But you’re also weak in another way.”

Steven held out his arm, ready to raise his shield against them. All he got was a mere grunt before Jasper grinned sinisterly.

“Your organic body. Get her.”

Within a second of that order, Lazuli clenched her fist, and Steven’s arms dropped to the side as he squirmed, the blood flow in his body suddenly slowing so much such that it was keeping him barely alive without completely killing him.

“I only ask that you listen to me.”

“Uh-uh. Run, and he gets it. Really, it’d be better for all of us if you just listen.”

A hand grasped Lapis’, who looked down to see Peridot holding onto her arm as if to calm her down. With new found confidence, she glared at the quartz, ready to face her down if it meant Steven’s life. “What do you want, Jasper? If it’s about Mala-“

The perfect quartz held out her hand, stopping Lapis from continuing. “Hmph. I’m not talking about that.” Jasper spread her arms out, as if she was welcoming old friends rather than enemies. A big smile on her face that seemed friendly, if not for the horns on her head or the fact that Steven was currently being trapped by their supposed friends. “Well, maybe, but that’s not the main point. I’ve come to invite you to join me. Yes,” she continued, seeing the stupefied face on the smaller gem’s face, “even you, Peridot.”

“You see, the diamonds that were in power. We had armies, we had everything. We could have conquered the galaxy, and do you know what happened?”

“Our gem society is lawless now! There’s a power gap that’s dividing all of us! There’s no-no purpose for us to exist anymore. And it’s all because of him!”

“But I’ve come to realise something. If you want to make a change, you’ve got to lead. And to lead, you need three things.”

“Oh yeah, you-you clod?!”

“Firstly, you need power.” She gestured at the three lapis lazulis standing before her. “Don’t you ever wonder why so few of you are made? It’s because the Diamonds themselves know how dangerous you are. Power gets you respect, and when you have respect, you get control.” The hungry glance in her direction lingered just long enough to feel uncomfortable. “We don’t even have to fuse. Just giving you access to water would be detrimental to any who rebel against you. You’ll have a place back in home world. Your statuses would be regained.” Peridot tugged a little harder at that, and Lapis placed her other hand on her to assure her that she wasn’t convinced.

If Jasper had noticed it, she didn’t say anything about it, instead continuing with her grand speech. “Secondly, brains.” She gestured at Peridot, and Lapis subconsciously stepped forward as if trying to shield her away from the immediate threat, just as she had done with the red eye those years ago. Jasper held out both of her hands placatingly, still grinning at the two gems as she turned her gaze towards the smaller of the two. “You’re pretty smart. You managed to figure out how to control metal, something that no other Era 2 peridot has ever figured out.” With a jolt, Peridot realised that Jasper was trying to convince her. “That story about the Crystal gems flying to home world on Yellow and Blue Diamond’s ships after both had supposedly crashed... while the Bismuth may have been able to fix the ship, only you out of the group could have had the technical knowhow to fix the ship, and that was without your limb enhancers. Just imagine how much greater you would be back in home world.”

(Lapis admittedly hadn’t been paying attention at that part, if only because she was more concerned about the other issue of Steven turning blue, which was not a natural color for humans, so it surprised her that she had remembered all of that. On the other hand, Peridot was more surprised that her once escort had even bothered to include her in her obviously villainous scheme, and while she was only slightly flattered, this was not a good time to be happy.)

Jasper continued on with her speech, ignoring the obvious lack of attention from the other two if she had even noticed that they were no longer looking at her, instead having a silent eye conversation between themselves.

(It’s one of those conversations that only people who had a great connection with each other could have, like a pair of best friends or a couple so in sync that they could read each other’s minds. And it went something like this:

A quick glance at all the gems surrounding them, before uncertainly looking back at Lapis. So... what do we do?

An incredulous look followed by a rapid shift as she glanced at Steven, almost frantically as if hoping the other would come up with some brilliant plan before scrunching you her eyebrows. Does it matter what we do? Steven’s dying! I...think. Blue isn’t a good thing for humans right? Something about drowning or lack of air...

Green eyes darted towards the perfect... well almost perfect quartz in front of them who was still monologuing, before glancing at Lapis and then Steven. Well, we obviously don’t want to be shattered by Jasper over there! We need to extricate Steven over there. Is there... is there a way you can get his blood to flow through his body again?

A confused face. I’m sorry? Didn’t get that.

A nod towards her hands and then to Lazuli and Blue. Your... yourself. You can, um, you know, your hands. Free him?

Her face looked thoughtful before she jerked her head to the other two blue gems and shook her head. Can’t, not with those two around. They’ll get to him before I can, and honestly I don’t know enough about humans to make sure he’s fine. Also, I’m plenty terrified, just so you know—)

“So what do you say?”

Both Lazuli and Blue looked at Lapis expectantly.

Both gems looked at each other, coming to a unanimous decision before facing Jasper.

“No.”

“Wow, but no thanks.”

They had expected her to throw a fit, for Jasper to growl at them for daring to oppose her.

Instead, Jasper huffed and shook her head, as if she was disappointed. She waved towards Lazuli, who released her grip on Steven, who slumped but was still breathing, gasping really, from the lack of oxygen in his body. “Well, I did try.”

And somehow, that display was more terrifying than any show of anger, because it meant that Jasper had actually wanted for them to work with her, and that she had expected, or at the very least believed, that there was a possibility that they would refuse her offer.

And for the first time since she had come into existence, Dioptase laughed, a hand pointing at the now constrained gem as she grinned.

“Nyeheheha! Got you!” Although she was no longer controlling the shape of the metal, unlike how Lapis’ water arms would lose its shape and just slump to the ground in a wet puddle in a similar scenario, the metal constraints held the giant together steadily, and Malachite was unable to shrug it off.

“Woah!” Conni eyes lit up with stars, breathing heavily after having held up a shield for at least a few minutes with an angry fusion smashing against it. “Who are you?”

“Steven, this really isn’t the time. In case you haven’t noticed, big angry gem behind us!”

“Come on, just a name?”

The fusion looked at her arms with both of her eyes. Now that she had a good chance to observe herself, the once Kindergartener part of her immediately recognised the greenish blue tint of her skin before grabbing onto one of Steven’s hands.

[deerfests]

( 001. the young pope/the new pope || 002. lenny/brannox || 003. sir john brannox ) && ( 001. space force || 002. malloraird || 003. dr adrian mallory ) && ( 004. the new pope/space force )

just for the heck of it, and because i’m greedy ☺️

fandom ask

man wth that's a lot... 😂😂😂

Okay, off we go~

001 | Send me a fandom and I will tell you my: + The Young Pope/The New Pope

Favorite character:

Sir John Brannox, because I love the emo pope. He's got so many issues, and he's lovable for it.

Least Favorite character:

Um... I guess I don't know. I don't want to offend anyone.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon):

I only have 2-- Sofia Dubois/Sir John Brannox and Lenny Belardo/Sir John Brannox. Judge me if you must *shrugs*

Character I find most attractive:

Lenny and Brannox gotta fight over that one. I like how both of them look.

Character I would marry:

My hand in marriage is saved for Trench, exclusively, and he's not even a character in the show. Sorry. 🤠

Character I would be best friends with:

Gutiérrez but that's cuz he's a nice man and stuff. The dude would be swept away by me doing bs and just end up enduring it, not because he likes me. Let's be real. Nobody in the show would like me enough to befriend me! Unless I somehow weasel my way to Brannox, and we bond over being sad bastards but I don't think I have the energy to deal with his moping...

a random thought:

I feel like Adam's grave fucked up the timeline, nothing adds up. I'm sorry, but how old is Brannox supposed to be?? I am confused.

An unpopular opinion:

I don't obsess with some characters the rest of the fandom seems to, so I guess that's my unpopular opinion.

my canon OTP:

Sofia Dubois/Sir John Brannox

Non-canon OTP:

Lenny Belardo/Sir John Brannox, because imagine how fun that'd be!

most badass character:

Fck, I feel it's Lenny in The Young Pope. He's just out there destroying things.

pairing I am not a fan of:

I don't desire to put a bullseye on my back.

character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another):

Hmm, I feel like Adam is an easy pick cuz for real, they did fuck up the timeline with him.

favourite friendship:

Lenny and Gutiérrez

character I want to adopt or be adopted by:

Nobody!! AH, that would screw me up big time.

002 | send me a ship and I will tell you: + Lenny/Brannox

when of if I started shipping it.

Like love at first sight, I fell for that shit since I saw them doing the world's most awkward prom picture. I mean, look at it:

And then I was pissed off... I watched the whole season and while I enjoyed it, I didn't get nearly enough interactions! But what I got, I treasure... Even if it probably tricks you into thinking this ship's dynamic is different than what I actually headcanon for them.

my thoughts:

Lenny would fuck up Brannox so badly. Then probably feel guilty about it to some extent, and try to do something about his incredibly low self-esteem. :) This is the only sfw thought I have.

What makes me happy about them:

:)) wouldn't you like to know.

I love, love, love the energy they would have, ok!? Imagine, the constant contrast of Lenny and Brannox! Just...imagine.

What makes me sad about them:

Lenny's dead. :((

Also, Brannox has no self-esteem. :(

things done in fanfic that annoys me:

IF there was fanfic of them, which there is none of, I checked-- I would be annoyed if somebody thought Brannox had any power to hold over Lenny. Also, IF there was fanfic, I would not hesitate to read it even if it was garbage, but there's none.

things I look for in fanfic:

Actually existing fanfic. There's none. I gotta write that shit myself, and I'm trying, but it's hard!

My kinks:

:)) I can't. I'll get shadowbanned. Lenny fucks him up, let's just say.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other:

Sofia with Brannox, death with Lenny, I guess?? I'm quite happy how the show ended, but I've never been one to want my ships to be canon, most of the time.

My happily ever after for them:

They quit the clergy, I guess, and Lenny lives with Brannox in the estate and they slip into an awkward but working relationship? Brannox gets over his problems and so does Lenny.

003 | Give me a character & I will tell you + Sir John Brannox.

How I feel about this character:

I feel I got into it before, but I love him.

All the people I ship romantically with this character:

Ah, this is a repeat. Sofia and Lenny, both in their own verses, never together at the same time.

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

....Happiness/Brannox.

My unpopular opinion about this character:

Not in the mood to put a bullseye on myself~

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

We got to see him interact more with ghost!Lenny. Like the scene at Adam's grave, just replay it 100x more.

my het ship:

Sofia and him.

my fem/slash ship:

Lenny and him.

my OTP:

Lenny/Brannox. But that might be cuz I love suffering and pissing people off.

my OT3:

None~

my cross over ship:

None???

my kink:

He has a praise kink.Probably cries during it, too.

a head cannon fact:

*gently puts a hand on Brannox's head* This bastard can fit so many obsessive thoughts in himself!

Also, sorry tumblr user sirjohnbrannox, I am stealing all your headcanons about him.

His parents probably mainly hated him cuz he was a non-straight punk, then started drugs to deal with his problems, and genuinely I feel like he's a little bit...how do I put this, not stable cuz of that. Adam was a perfect son, John meanwhile ended up traumatized and soft and scared. He has no self-esteem cuz his parents fucking sucked and played favorites!! And also probably blamed him for Adam’s death, I guess.  Fuck Brannox's parents!! I don't want to see them!!

my gender bend:

I don't have one, cuz I don't like them~

&&

001 | Send me a fandom and I will tell you my: + Space Force

Favorite character:

Dr. Adrian Mallory, duh.

Least Favorite character:

RIP in PEPPERONI, KICK !! I HOPE YOU DIE.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon):

I literally only have one ship, Adrian/Mark.

Character I find most attractive:

In this episode of Dickie sets up ridiculous fights: Adrian Mallory vs Mark Naird. For whoever of the two, I actually find most attractive. Because I don't know, but boys are good.

Character I would marry:

HHHHH no

Character I would be best friends with:

Adrian, but only because we're both could be judgemental af... together!

a random thought:

Man, I hope they didn't make Malk shave for season 2. I'd hate that.

An unpopular opinion:

I don't care that much for Fuck Tony, I'm sorry. He's fine, I just-- don't really see the appeal of him. Maybe, just maybe, I'm too much into old men.

my canon OTP:

I...no? IDK!? Ali/Chan is cute, I guess and they're canon.

Non-canon OTP:

Adrian/Mark, which probably will never be actually canon and we'll keep getting ship baited.RIP. Good that I don't care about my ships being canon all that much.

most badass character:

???? IN SPACE FORCE????

pairing I am not a fan of:

I do not care for Ch*ntony. RIP. Not a NOTP but I just don't see it.

character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another):

Erin Naird. I understand where's she's coming from, but my god.... they really wrote it poorly.

favourite friendship:

Mark and Adrian in the canon lense I guess.

character I want to adopt or be adopted by:

Nope.

002 | send me a ship and I will tell you: + Malloraird

when of if I started shipping it.

When tumblr user sirjohnbrannox didn't shut up about it.

my thoughts:

It's cute, but my kinky hands will continue rubbing off on it.

What makes me happy about them:

Adrian being head over heels for a dense fool.

What makes me sad about them:

Nothing, cuz there's nothing sad in the show? Or at least nothing I am emotionally invested into enough to actually be upset about?

things done in fanfic that annoys me:

Y'all really think Adrian is vanilla? Y'all really think Adrian is anything but a brat?

things I look for in fanfic:

I am interested in a plot, that has a build-up for these two. So...my fic, In Need, which I am still working on. Cuz I literally stopped after my life fell apart and I couldn't handle the daunting comments. Anyways as I was saying. In Need-- except make it good.

My kinks:

:)) I don't want to get shadowbanned but Adrian is not vanilla, let's just say.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other:

Just keep Mark with his wife, I don't care. Adrian, anyone but Jerome. It was painful to witness Jerome. I'm sorry, but how do you write Adrian-- a fairly not too stereotypical gay man? And then write him to be with somebody like Jerome, which just comes off as "oh shit we need a character for this and we didn't establish anyone!"

Also-- Jerome/Adrian is, unfortunately, canon-- why does the wiki make it creepy and one-sided?!!?

My happily ever after for them:

Maggie gets out of prison, runs off with her guard lover (which I'm actually fairly certain will happen), and Mark slowly enters a relationship with Adrian which actually results in both of them widening their views on things and getting along.

003 | Give me a character & I will tell you + Dr Adrian Mallory

How I feel about this character:

He's pretty cool. Fun.

All the people I ship romantically with this character:

I literally only ship him with Mark, cuz Jerome gives me the worst vibes that make me actively partake in Jerome erasure.

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

404 BrOTP not found.

My unpopular opinion about this character:

The man's a brat.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

I wish he would have sung that song about Mark, and it would have actually been one side and nobody would have figured it out (so no photo kissing at the end) lmao cuz that'd -- now that'd be cursed and fun. >:3c

my het ship:

He's canonically gay so none. Unless season 2 decides to make him bisexual, this will continue.

my fem/slash ship:

Him with Mark.

my OTP:

Him and Mark. God, doing these memes is getting repetitve.

my OT3:

None.

my cross over ship:

Lmao none. I mean, c'mon I don't even like crossovers 99% of the time.

my kink:

:DD are you trying to get me shadowbanned, bud.

a head cannon fact:

I have none that I can share here, or at least none springing to mind... but can we all agree that people saying Adrian is a spy or he has intentions for Space Force's downfall, is so funny, because it's literally not that deep. He's just gay and in love with Mark, how much do the r*dditors gotta overthink the damn show? It's not even that good to overthink!

my gender bend:

NO, I don't like them.

&&

004 | send me 2 fandoms and I will give yo my crossover OTP + The New Pope/Space Force

None of these, I am not answering this, cuz this is the worst crossover ever conceived by man and I don't even like crossovers enough to begin with and my laptop is dying from heat--

....;

no? ok.

Imagine poor ol' Brannox meeting Adrian. Goodbye.

[maaaaaatryoshka0325]

Not Afraid of the Dark - Part 17 Seo Changbin Gang AU

Warnings: alcohol, angst

Chapter is slightly short because of how I’m planning the ending (yes it’ll be ending soon :() I honestly wish I could keep writing it but dragging along a series could make it go bad :/ but I AM working on Arcane (Lee Know Mafia series!)

I might make this end at 20 chapters, maybe a little more.

Your heart fell through your chest as you slammed the door shut and ran down the stairs. You collected yourself a tiny bit so you could “calmly” walk out the front door. You wobbled down the street before you collapsed as tears flew down your face and sobs shook your body. You curled into yourself in a small field up the street from Daniels house. You trembled as you gasped for air as an anxiety attack shook your body.

How could he replace you already? Did those months really mean nothing to him? It made no sense to your drunken mind.

“Y/N?! Y/N! Are you okay?”

You groggily looked up and saw Jisung kneeling in front of you, his eyes looked concerned.

“Is everything okay?” He asked again.

You didn’t say anything. The world was spinning and your heart hurt. You just dropped your head back on your arm and he rubbed your back.

“What’s going on?” You heard Felix’s deep voice.

“Are you okay?” His voice had gotten closer, but you didn’t want to raise your head and look.

“Y/N!” You heard Lucy call and felt her arms around you.

“Y/N what happened?” She asked.

You looked up at her and started to cry again. She hugged you tightly as Felix rubbed your arm.

“Daniel grab her a water!” Lucy yelled.

She stroked your hair and made you drink the cold water Daniel brought to you. Daniel knelt beside you with her and talked to you until you calmed down.

“Maybe we should leave this to Lucy.” Daniel said.

Felix and Jisung nodded and followed Daniel back to the house.

“Y/N what happened?” Lucy asked, her face concerned.

You broke down and told her what you saw. Changbin and that girl in the bathroom. The lipstick mark on his lips. The way her skirt was higher than it already was (if possible). She gasped and her eyes narrowed.

“I can’t believe-“ she began, then fell silent.

You groggily lifted your head and saw Changbin standing in front of the both of you. His eyes were dark as he stepped forward and knelt down to look at you. You looked away from him, not being able to look at his face without crying.

“God you reek of alcohol. How drunk are you?” He asked.

You heard Lucy mumble something and get up. Their voices were around you, but you couldn’t make out what was being said. In that moment you knew: you fucked up when you chugged the liquor out of the beer bong.

You felt Lucy’s hand on your back as she leaned in close to your ear.

“I’m going back in. Call me if you need me, okay?” She said.

You were confused as to what she meant, then you felt a strong hands on your elbows as you were hauled to your feet. You wobbled a bit and tried to steady yourself as the world started to spin again.

“How much did you drink?” You heard his voice near your ear.

You didn’t respond as you shook your head and tried to take another step. You grabbed a hold of a pole and heard a sigh as he wrapped his arm around your waist and led you into his car. You leaned your head against the window as he drove you back to your place. He opened your door and you immiediatly dashed for the bathroom. You clutched the sides of the toilet as the little bit of stomach content you had in there came out. Your body trembled as you curled into yourself again, not liking the way the room spun and the heavy feeling in your head.

You felt a warm hand on your arm as he kneeled beside you.

“Do you want a shower? You have alcohol all over you.” He said lowly.

You nodded and he ran the hot water. You began to undress and got stuck in your shirt. You sighed and felt his hands gently slide over your skin as he raised your shirt off of you. You worked on your pants as he helped you into the shower. He walked out of the bathroom as you scrubbed yourself and leaned against the shower wall. After feeling like you were clean enough, you slowly got out and wrapped yourself up in a towel and gargled mouth wash. The room was spinning more after you spit it out and you slid down the wall and wrapped your arms around your legs.

You heard the door open and felt his hand on your shoulder.

“You really shouldn’t of drank that much.” He said.

You didn’t say anything as he wrapped one arm under your legs and the other around you and lifted you up, bringing you into your bedroom and sitting you on your bed. He went to your dresser and handed you underwear. You glanced up at him as he froze. He slowly picked up one of the hoodies he had left after he stopped talking to you. He swallowed hard and helped you get it over your head. You closed your eyes as you trembled again, the room spinning a lot more. You felt his arms around you from behind as he pulled you into his chest. His scent was overwhelming, but it calmed you down. You felt his chin on your shoulder as he rubbed soft, comforting circles into your arm.

“I’m so sorry.” He whispered.

You rested your cheek on your knee and looked back at him.

“Felix told me what happened. What you told him. I’m so sorry Y/N.” He said lowly.

“What happened that night?” He asked.

You felt your body trembled again just thinking of it.

“N-Naoki asked me if he could talk to me. I thought something had happened so I didn’t think anything of it. He grabbed me and kissed me and wouldn’t let me go.” You whispered.

You felt his hold on you tighten as he bit his lip.

“And I left you alone with him...” He said in a low, angry tone.

“He didn’t hurt you, did he?” He asked.

A tear slipped past your left eye as you closed your eyes.

“N-No.” You whispered.

“Y/N.” He firm voice made you open your eyes.

You raised your hand and opened it and heard his breath get caught in his throat.

“H-He broke it when I went to go after you.” You whispered, the broke bracelet in your palm as tears poured down your cheeks.

You felt him bury his face into the crook of your neck.

“He could’ve hurt you.. And you’re more worried about the fact that he broke it?” He asked, his voice shaking.

You nodded as your tears dropped onto his arms, and they tightened around you.

“H-How could you kiss another girl right after leaving me? How could you get over me so fast?” You whimpered.

He turned you around in between in his legs and gently cupped your cheeks.

“Y/N, I didn’t kiss her, okay? I went to get water for you and Lucy, because Daniel was going to get it but I wanted him to watch you two and he wants Lucy to drink water after every drink. I wanted to talk to you since Felix had just told me but you looked like you were having too much fun and I didn’t want to ruin in. I went to get the waters but that girl, man I don’t even remember her name, said she wasn’t feeling well and if I could help her to the bathroom. When I got up there she kissed me, but when you came in is when I was pushing her away.” He said.

You closed your eyes as relief filled you, a tear slipping out. He gently wiped it away as he still held your face.

“I could NEVER replace you Sweetheart. Ever. I can’t imagine being with anyone else.” He said, leaning his forehead on yours.

“And I’m so sorry that I didn’t stop and ask you what happened. I’m sorry that I left you there alone with him. I’m sorry you had to see another girls lipstick on my mouth. I’m- I’m so sorry.” He whispered as a tear slipped past his eyes.

He pulled you into his chest as you cried. You weren’t crying out of sadness, but out of relief. Relief because Seo Changbin still loved you, despite everything that happened. He’s still here for you. He had his face buried into your hair as he himself started to cry. He had been heartbroken for nearly two weeks. Full of anger and sadness. He rubbed your back as you clutched his shirt tightly.

“I love you Sweetheart.” He whispered.

“I love you too, Changbin.” You whispered back.

He pulled away from you and pressed a soft kiss to your lips. You closed your eyes and slid your hand onto his cheek as you leaned into the kiss.

When he pulled away, his glassy eyes were filled with love. He laid you down and pulled you into his chest.

“I missed you so much.” He said softly.

“I missed you more.” You whispered.

He held your cheek in his hand and gently rubbed his thumb on your face.

“Your eyes are so dark Sweetheart.” He said, concern filling his voice.

“I know, I’ve just been working a lot.” You said.

He kissed your forehead and played with your hair.

“Get some sleep and sleep off the alcohol, okay?” He said.

“W-Will you sleep here with me?” You asked.

He nodded and pulled your blanket over the both of you as you buried your face into his chest. Your heavy eyes closed as you were wrapped in his warmth and scent.

You woke up to feeling something move, and when you opened your eyes, you saw Changbin’s face close to yours.

“Good morning Sweetheart.” He said.

You rubbed your eyes and blinked at him, then rubbed them again. He laughed as you looked at him.

“Don’t remember what happened?” He asked.

“I-I thought it was a dream.” You replied.

He smiled and stroked your cheek as you looked at him with affection.

“No Sweetheart, I’m really here.” He said.

You smiled at him before wincing at the headache that crashed into your head. He stood up and walked into your kitchen, coming back with a glass of cold water and some painkillers. You took them and leaned back into your pillows.

“Are you hungry? I’ll go get us some food.” He offered.

You nodded as he walked out and grabbed his keys and headed out the door. When the door shut you closed your eyes as tears slid down the sides of your face. He was really back. He was there wth you.

When he came back, he handed you some hangover soup and your favorite take out.

“How about some movies for today?” He suggested.

You nodded as he pulled you against him and flipped through some movies. You both decided on a comedy as you ate.

“I missed you.” You slipped out.

He placed a soft kiss to your head as he let a small smile fill his face.

“I missed you too Sweetheart.” He said softly.

[miheirie]

hi!

I think I wrote this whole thing for you guys a couple....hundred times now. It’s long but it is extremely important to me, and I have been dwindling around this whole thing for quite some time. Two people might read it or two hundred, it doesn’t matter.

 I needed to say somethings just for the sake of my friends on here who message me every now and then but I’m also doing this for the sake of my wellbeing. I hope you stick around to read the whole thing, and I hope you can continue to stick around me as well, love u guys. 

Warnings: There will be mentions of depression as well as suicidal themes. I put asteriks (*) to mark the sections where I do mention these themes. Please, if these warnings apply to you, be cautious of the asteriks (*), or scroll through. If you do feel the way I did, know that 1) you are not alone and 2) there is help and good in the world. Also this wasn’t edited very well, bc I was a nervous bean who didn’t want to reread. 

Another warning I have is that this whole shenangian biggie majiggie is pretty long, so TLDR (too long dont/didnt read): I did not love myself, but now I do. That being said, here we go!

I started this tumblr on Halloween of 2018 with the intentions of just reblogging stuff about the one and only Harold Styeel (hehe). That was it, no writing no messaging other people, nothing. That obviously didn’t last long because I met people. 

I read imagines and fics and stories and sequels, all so beautifully written it would make my heart throb. And these stories or posts wouldn’t make my heart throb because Harry was in them but because I fell in love with the writers. I fell in love with how passionate they were in writing every single series, how much time it took for them to write 1,000+ words, and to edit them and post headers and etc. I fell in love with the way Harry was written not as a pop idol, but as a human man, with different lives, whether it was Boxer Harry or Librarian Harry, or whatever occupation they wanted him in. And no longer for me was it about him, it was about the story (ok, fine sometimes it was about him...). 

So I did what everyone did, I decided to write. I posted my own drabbles of Harry. I ventured off into a world that had the worst stigma of being crazy, psychotic, obsessive and weird. And I did it anyway because I felt safe, and loved and respected, because you guys did that. I still get messages or anons once in a while, where someone just wanted to pop in to tell me they loved chapter 3, or how I should fix a certain part and being in that world, helped me with everything. I was happy, I was in love. I met people who showed me the world. I met my best friend! What more could anyone ask for?

*WARNING*

But soon it wasn’t about the story anymore, nor was it about the people. I fell into a weird spiraling hole. I was ashamed and disappointed and mad and upset about myself. I soon hated everything I wrote, every single thing. It didn’t matter how many notes I got or how many messages, I loathed posting each and every single story. 

This hatred wasn’t just confined in the world of miheirie, it invaded my life. I hated what I looked like, how I felt, how I dressed, hell, I started hating how I laughed. I think the worst thing was, was that throughout this whole mist of hatred, I felt stupid. I wasn’t comparing myself to anyone, I was just comparing myself against myself (i know it doesn’t make sense, my brain got jumbled here). 

I would blame myself for the smallest things. Its your fault no one likes you, its your fault she doesn’t want to talk to you, its your fault they left, its your fault for being here.

And I knew I felt this way before, it was when I was suicidal a few months prior to the year of 2018. I hated, hated hated hated, myself. I would wish for my own silence and sometimes, it almost worked. 

*

This isn’t a story about how I get better and how I am super happy now. This is how I tried. I tried so freaking hard to live for myself. And I need you (if you read up to this point message me drink water dum dum), each and every single on of you to know, that if you ever feel this way to do the same. To live for you, to live for the smallest things that ignites sparks within your body. For me it was cleaning and journaling and painting little stars on my nails. I would sometimes fall into that whole, and some days I stayed in that hole for hours, days, but the mantra I needed was to live for me.

I started by removing toxic people from my phone, then to removing the things I always hated about my room (stupid closet door), then it came to organizing my goals, what did i want to accomplish my tonight? Was it to drink more water, or was it to orgabnize my backpack? I started extremely small, then as months passed, I went bigger. 

I deleted every single story from my blog. I know, it was hard for me. I cried, so so so so much. But it wasn’t all sad. Those stories for me were kind of torture, I only liked a few, but even then, I wasn’t happy. I felt like i was regurgitating ideas, and when I reread to proofread, I would gag. (I am so dramatic wth). So I deleted them, if enough of guys want to read them, I DO have them saved, and I can create a little something for you guys can see. 

I didn’t write nearly everything I was feeling, but I wrote enough. I was unhappy with my life, it felt like everything was wrong. I needed time from myself for myself to heal because I was just a huge mess. And within this hiatus, I discovered quite a few things; 

I really don’t like celery.

I love going to therapy, that shit is amazing. 

I’m pansexual.

I like YOGA!

Banana creme pie is orgasmic. 

Holy shit, did I really just say that? Online? That I...... like YOGA?!?! hAAHA, no but really, I am pansexual. Me discovering that is a whole other long ass post (interest? tell me!), but I feel like taking a break not only from tumblr, but from being online and from people outside my doors, was needed. 

That being said, I feel good? Yes, I do. I feel amazing, I’m basking in the sun and I feel so freaking good. Do I not feel good sometimes? Hell yea. Do I fall into depressive holes every now and then? All the time. But do I start again, no matter how long it took for me to start? All the time. 

I love you guys, I love this blog, I love everything about this community. I would feel unreal if you guys would have me again. Thank you being here, thank you for reading, even if it was a glimpse, and thank you for being you to inspire me, to be happy. 

<3 miheirie

[welllpthisishappening]

I feel like I should tell you that second last bullet point about PK and Matt made me cry immediately wow the emotions Laura

Hellooooooo anon. I AM HERE TO FORCE MY HOCKEY DOG EMOTIONS ON YOU, IN A WAY THAT SOUNDS FAR LESS THREATENING THAN THAT. Here are some more emotions that got decidedly more emotional as I wrote them. 

Age update because there are words here: Matt just got drafted. So he’s almost 21, Peggy is 17 closing in on 18 and Chris is 11. This is a few months after Getting in the Shooting Lanes and goes along with this post about the dog Will and Belle adopt. His name is PK. That story is here. 

I’ve got no excuse for this except how often Tyler Seguin posts about his dogs. Also, like, how much I want Chris Jones to be certain his older brother is the best player in the entire NHL ever. Alright, let’s get emotional:

“So, uh, Mom, you think you’re ever going to stop crying, or, like…what’s the deal?”

Emma glanced down, narrowing her eyes slightly at the smiling kid in front of her – decked in head to toe Rangers team apparel and that was actually pretty impressive because she could not begin to fathom where he got shoes with the appropriate color scheme.

Chris smiled, rocking back on the heels of those same shoes and he spent far too much time wth far too many professional athletes. It was doing wonders for his self-confidence. And, now, there was one more professional athlete to contend with.

Emma was never going to stop crying.

“That���s not an answer, you know,” Chris pointed out, hooking his thumb through the loop in his jeans and most of them had changed at some point between landing at JFK and finding their way back uptown and none of them had really slept. They were a whirlwind of brand-new jerseys that looked oddly familiar because they still said Jones above the number twenty and that was, at least, seventy-six percent of the reason Emma couldn’t stop crying, and there were FaceTime calls to be made and Roland Locksley actually screaming in Philadelphia  and Elsa nearly sobbing in Colorado and they should all probably eat something.

Emma couldn’t remember the last time they ate something.

“You’re not nearly as funny as you think you are, kid,” Emma muttered, tugging on the front of Chris’ shirt. He did something ridiculous with his eyebrows.

“And you’re going to set a record for crying in a single day.”

Emma inhaled, something potentially maternal and possibly a bit like grounding on the tip of her tongue, but the eleven-year-old in front of her had grown up far too much in the last few weeks, ankle a normal size again, and he’d spent most of those same few weeks reading any draft information he could find.

He regularly printed out reports that Matt was going to go anywhere except second overall to the Rangers, just so he could crumple them up and dramatically throw them into the corner of the room. Killian found a small mountain of them a few days ago. He made Chris take them out.

And then discussed draft options with Chris for several hours after.

Emma scowled when her kid didn’t stop smirking at her, lips twisted and eyebrows still just as high. She inhaled again, another quick pull of air through her teeth as several voices came from the kitchen.

“Yeah, that’s probably true,” she admitted, and Chris didn’t argue when she pulled him against her side, lips on the top of his hair and the very likely misplaced effort to keep him eleven for the rest of his life.

She was crying again.

“Although Aunt Elsa may give you a run for your money,” Chris added.

“That was just because she saw Dad crying.”

“Dad cried?”

“Oh definitely.”

Chris was silent for a moment, and for half a second Emma felt something dangerously close to terror slink down her spine, a cold rush of worry that landed in the pit of her stomach with an almost audible thump. She swallowed, licking her lips and willing her pulse to stay relatively human. It had been through enough already in the last twenty-four hours.

And she absolutely, positively was not prepared for the sniffle she heard.

Emma twisted on this spot, nearly losing her balance in the process, but Chris’ teeth were digging into his lower lip and he looked a little wobbly himself, eyes squeezed closed and shoulders shifting and—

“Kid,” Emma snapped, crouching in front of him and that was a mistake because he towered over her now. “Hey, hey, hey, what’s the matter? Is this a hunger thing?”

“I’m not an actual baby anymore, Mom, I’m not crying because I’m hungry.”

“Then…”

Chris clicked his tongue, exhaling with a put-upon sound that made him look far older than Emma ever wanted. That felt selfish. But one kid had already gotten drafted that night and the other was getting ready for college and she really had no idea why they’d agreed to come back to Will and Belle’s apartment.

Maybe they had food.

She couldn’t remember if they had food home. Probably not. They’d been far too preoccupied with draft stock and a whole week of prep in Chicago and picking out color-coordinated ties.

“He’s totally going to wreck in the league,” Chris mumbled, eyes still closed, but pointed towards his feet anyway and Emma’s heart could not cope with this. Her whole being could not cope with this. “Just like…he’s probably going to set some kind of rookie scoring record.”

“I think they may have him play in the AHL for awhile.”

“Yeah, right. You’ve seen how fast Matt is, right? We’re desperate for that kind of speed.”

“We?”

Chris’ eyes all but flew open – probably so they could get them as wide as humanly possible when he realized what he said. “Ah, that’s how it works or something, right? Even without my own speed.”

Emma swallowed, not sure she could actually voice the myriad of increasingly sentimental nonsense sitting in the back of her throat and she nearly fell over when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Matt was still wearing the jersey they’d  made him put on when they called his name, but there was an actual name on the back now and he smiled at his brother when he met his gaze.

“Keep using the collective pronoun, C,” Matt said. “But Mom may be right about the AHL. We’ll see how camp goes.”

Chris rolled his eyes. They were getting as good a workout as Emma’s pulse. “Are you serious?” he scoffed, and there were more footsteps and she didn’t even have to look up when Killian moved next to her.

“That’s usually how it works, kid,” Killian reasoned.

“You didn’t play in the AHL.”

“Ah, well, he’s got you on that one,” Emma muttered, glancing up and Killian’s smirk was a bit more fine-tuned than either one of their kids. They’d get there. Probably. They were all far too competitive not to.

“If this is about MD playing in the Garden on opening night, then I don’t think that’s going to happen,” Peggy shouted from the kitchen. She was probably sitting on the counter. Emma was almost surprised there was a plaque there, designating it as Margaret Elsa Jones’ space and solely for Margaret Elsa Jones.

Matt clicked his tongue. “Wow, that’s actually kind of rough, Mar.”

“And not true,” Chris added. “You seen our centermen? Their face-off percentage is the worst.”

“I mean not the worst,” Killian shrugged. “It got better last season.”

“Dad. It’s not good. It’s not totally your fault, you’re not a centermen. But I bet Matt could help out.”

“Wow, thanks for that incredible vote of confidence, C,” Matt mumbled, the smile still on his face when he tugged Chris towards him. “Although he’s right about that face-off percentage, Dad. Embarrassing.”

Killian groaned, holding out a hand for Emma and she didn’t quite stumble into his side, but it was awfully close and she’d blame the whole thing on dehydration via crying. So, naturally, there was something else to cry about immediately.

And maybe the real reason they’d come back to Will and Belle’s apartment.

Matt made a noise that somewhere closer to a yelp of excitement than anything else, Peggy all but leaping out of the kitchen and sprinting towards the living room, somehow sliding into both of her brothers when her socks proved unable to provide any traffic on the hardwood floor.

“Ah, of course,” Killian mumbled, mostly into Emma’s hair when his mouth landed there and her vision was already starting to swim in front of her eyes.

And, really, she should have known from the very beginning because, really, they’d been with that dog from the very beginning and Emma was almost surprised Roland didn’t demand to be put on this FaceTime phone call too. He and Matt regularly argued over who was PK’s favorite.

It might have been Chris.

“It’s definitely Chris,” Killian muttered. He winked when Emma gaped at him.

“God, you’re the only reason Chris thinks he’s as funny as he’s absolutely not. Why are you a mindreader?”

“You’re not very good at disguising your emotions when you’re weeping them out, love.”

“Oh, shut up. You could use some eye drops too.”

He didn’t quite blush, but the tips of his ears went read, eyebrows twisted and another kiss pressed to her temple. “I wouldn’t say no, honestly.”

“You guys are missing this moment,” Will announced, perched on the arm of his couch with his fingers wrapped around Belle’s shoulder and Matt was kneeling on the floor in the first Rangers jersey that was his, making faces at a dog that had been as much a part of his childhood as anything.

Emma was seriously never going to stop crying.

“Make sure you get the good angles,” Belle laughed, and Chris hummed in response, a phone in his hand and a smile on his face. “That way we get all the likes.”

“Ah, we’re going to get all the likes, aren’t we?” Matt asked, an absurd twist of facial expressions at a dog who was drifting very close to ancient, but still managed to get down the hallway when he realized the Jones Line had come to visit.

“This is honestly the best part of the weekend,” Peggy announced. “Way better than those facts we learned about Chicago.”

Kilian groaned. “You appreciated those facts. You had no idea the world’s first skyscraper was built in Chicago.”

“Somehow I feel like I’d have gotten by without this information.”

“But now you know and you can brag about it.”

“When would that ever come up?”

“Make it happen, Margaret.”

“Oh my God.”

Emma laughed, burrowing her head into Killian’s chest and that was a mistake because Belle mentioned angles again and Matt was still making faces when she looked up, mumbling a string of barely understandable words to a dog who absolutely could not hear him.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Matt laughed. He was on his stomach now, sprawled out across the floor without a single care to what it was doing to his jersey. “Listen, PK, listen, listen, I’ve got exciting news, man.”

PK barked in response.

“Yeah, that’s right. Listen, hey, remember when we were kids and we made Rol practice that one wrist shot and then you showed up and made sure we could get the puck back? Well, it totally worked, PK because I got drafted.”

Another bark.

And several sniffles.

A world record for crying. Right there in Belle and Will’s apartment.

“He’s going to get called up by Thanksgiving,” Chris announced, eyes flashing back to Emma and Killian like either of them would be wiling to contradict him. “I’ll bet you guys Matt’s signing bonus.”

“No deal,” Matt grinned. He hadn’t gotten off the floor yet, but no one told him to move and Chris handed Emma the phone so she could actually hit upload when all three Jones kids moved to brush their fingers over PK’s back.

“Thanksgiving,” Chris repeated. “At the latest.”

The video got an absolutely ridiculous amount of hits, Roland leaving several caps lock comments about MISSING OUT and, three days before Thanksgiving, with the Rangers playing in Vancouver, Emma’s phone rang – “Mom,” Matt said, and she could hear the giddy sound his voice, the way it managed to crack on three letters and one word and all that meaning. She sat down.

They almost missed puck drop, calling in every favor from every single person they knew and Graham met them at the airport, ignoring several laws on both sides of the border to get them there on time and Emma cried again.

So did Killian. So did Peggy. It made the phone in her hand shake.

Chris didn’t. He smiled.

“Told you.”

[larissaloki]

Abusive relationships,

Yes another one of these, ths my own personal experiences with a relationship that ended nearly two years ago. I’ve only just gotten the confidence too share as to this day, my son is still negatively affected by the aftermath.

Thankfully my relationship only lasted 2 months before i wised up and kicked his ass to the curb. These kinds of relationships can happen to anyone, not just women, so this post will hopefully serve as a warning for everyone on what to look out for.

Before i continue i will warn that content can be sensitive for some (obviously) but also mentions of a bdsm esk lifestyle. Not overly explitic but it’s still there. Also I am just writng out as it pops into my head so bare with my ramblings as this hard to get out.

To start off with, I am a single mum living in a flat and at the time i was working part time (18 hours a week a the time) with a 2 year old toddler and 22 years old. Despite having a son I was lonely a lot as a lot of friends stopped contacting me and my weekly dnd group was disbanded so my human interactions where limited and lets just say retail doesn’t equate to good human contact.

Fast forward because you don’t want to hear about my struggles wth dating as humourous it is. I met (lets call him D) D and as always, things see well- D was sweet and charmng and was seemingly ok with me having a toddler. Brillant! i thought i had hit gold with this guy.

This how abusers are, they make themselves seem to sweet and amazing that you become blind any faults. You know that saying “I’m not like those guys, not all guys are like that” D used these words when describng himself and in conversations. in my experience with him and a few other people, people that have used these sentences are often exactly like the ones they say they aren’t.

So far everything he’s done is present a pleasent package that sound and looks trustworthy and a nice guy. Making the bad traits come across as just mere off days. I was so blinded by the fact that he seemed to sweet and nice that i didn’t realise exactly what he was doin for a mere two months. thankfully talks at schools and thing’s I’ve read online and family members helped me clock onto his games.

ALWAYS LISTEN TO FAMILY! i say this because they noticed within weeks what he was doing and were trying to find ways to warn me. He seemed hesitant to meet my family after a month of dating which for my family is odd, as we are a pretty tight family more or less at the times. My mum met everyones partners quickly as we all visited each other a lot at the time.

when she did meet him a month into dating and was talking to him, D admitted that he would read my phone over my shoulder ALL.THE.TIME. This is not good, nothing i thought was private actually was. But his own phone was protected like it was the holy grail of all holy grails. I never actually asked to see his phone but it’s somethin i noticed after we broke up that he would always hide the screen from anyone in the room. He would try and create arguments over anything with my mu and sister when they were at my home while i was working, watching over my son. At this pont i wasn’t still comfortable enough for D to be along with my son.

When i then got home, my mum and sister would leave quickly unable to stand being in D’s presence. this made me think they simply just didn’t like him, so when it annoyed me, D would jump onto my rants and feed them. Make my anger at my mum and sister worse by telling white lies, basically fanning the flames. People, if your partner does this- take a step back and wonder why.

D was purposefully driving wedges between me and my family and later my best friend by complaining about each and trying to get me to join his point of view. Tryng to get me to view them as hinderences rather than support. Driving me to focus on him completely and not them. Do not let anyone destroy your family ties, especially ones with your closest family.

then theres the other little things, like comlaining how i wash my hair and which products i use saying i was damaging myself. everything i used was of good value and methods professional hairdressers adviced me to use. But apparently a guy who doesn’t even condition and had short balding hair had better knowledge then me. this is another form of control, trying to tell me how to do things. same with cooking, I’m not a bad cook i can make somegood meals but he insisted on cooking saying he’s amazing at cooking. He would often put in way to much garlic and onion making the meals he made full of to much flavour and would get upset when my poor 2 year old wouldn’t eat or I wouldnt. Even when i told him not to put so much he would snap saying he knew what he was doing.

Then theres the guilt tripping and telling me how to raise my child. A person who has no children was apparently more knowledgable than me who read articles and books and have a mother who’s had 4 kids herself. When out and about he would get annoyed when my 2 year old had a tantrum and play up.

saying that my son was being a disrespectful shit to me and would publically shame me for ignoring or trying to appease my son depending on what the tantrum was over. RED FLAG! A 2 year old cannot be disrespectful, my son struggles with speech to this day due to D demanding my son uses his words and not cries to display hs wants. D’s view was that kids should be perfectly articulate at 2 year old and understand all these adult social cue’s.

Then at bed times, D hated that i cuddled my son till he slept and that my son came intomy bed halfwa through the night for comfort reasons. So he demanded i changed the night routine to involve maths for my 2 year old and a story while my son was in bed then just walkout of the bedroom. leave my son alone regardle if he was upset, my heart broke at my sons cries as D scared my son back into bed and kept leaving him. Ignoring my concerns with this method saying it wht he read online and eventually my son will sleep. worst two weeks of my life until i broke the cycle as I just couldn’t allow it to continue.

i was fas growing afraid of D at this point. One night he flipped his shit as i turned over in bed declaring it was to hot to share the bed due to my memory foam topper and that he runs hot anyway. he threw his phone at the wall over it. Another time he yelled at me for not trying a certain stores jellybabies when i said. didn’t like jellybabies, saying that i was being stubborn as this stores jelly babies were delicious. i promised to try them later- when he was out i threw them away and just told him that yes they were ok.

He mocked the games i played and liked, i love final fantasy and rpg games a lot. i find them entertaining but he mocked them saying i should play more fighter interactve games. he made me play one that i just found dull and did not like at all.

After this he was also scaring me with his bsm ettiquette, anyone in bdsm know that you respected your partners limits and repected their safe word and what they tell you the are ok with and what they aren’t ok with. A few times he violated this. He liked to give pain and i liked mostly pleasure and rope play. A hard limit for me was belts- i was not ok with them at all, he used one one session and i had to safe word out quickly which he found fuckng funny. This is not ok. Another time we wanted to try a new pose with ropes and the position i was in was making me feel ill half way through beng tied, so i safe worded and asked me to get me out as i felt sick.

If your partner is in rope and feels unwell or safe words out- get them out fast! Cut the ropes if you need to you can always buy more ffs. But D didn’t, he sighed and slowly untied me. No matter how much i begged him to hurry up he went at his own slow ass pace. Do not do this as something someone once found enjoyable suddenly no longer is.

And lastly, do not snap at your sub if your rope plans dont go to plan. Do not make them feel bad if something doent work. I was snapped at when ties he was tryng for the first time weren’t working, nothing i could help.

towards the end he told my mum when they again where at mine alone that he would be moving in in 6 months time so she had best get usedto him being here. we had only been dating at this point for less than 2 months. I have a rule that i don’t move in with someone unles i’ve been with them for more than 2-3 years at the minimum.

8 MONTHS IS TO SOON.

the event that pretty much spelled the end for this? was my sons bday and D turned up after eveyone had gone which fair enough, lots of kids wasn’t his thing. I had some alcohol and energy drinks as well, he offere weed which i had had before unaware of him slipping me ectasy as well.

All of these things did not respond well to me, hours later in the next morning as i had this 9 pm the night before, by 10 am D left to go home and i was dealing with what i think was the come down. Badly. Ikept having panic attack and was not right for two days after. My heart kept going dangerous speeds that i had to call my mum and sister for help as D said he woudlnt come over as i wa just beng silly and that it would pass. I was worried for my son if something was to happen to me over it.

After this i talked to my mum and the truth was coming out in small bits. I stupidly was on the fence about what my mum was telling me as i was reliant on D’s affection and we i went to get a coil (birth control device) and D hated that i was going with my mum and that i had been talking to her.

He got defensive and was telling me i didnt need my mum in my life. His mum wa dead and he was doing well, so i didn’t need mine in hs eyes. This is maniplative as fuck and he was an asshole trying to use this. By thi point. Was wising up to his tactics and games with teh help of my mum exposing what he hadsaid to her and i dumped him.

He tried to then play around with getting his things back and tried to arrange it when i would be alone. Never meet an ex like this alone people i beg you, i got my mums bf to wait for him instead,and i prepacked his stuff so he couldnt possibly steal anything. When he saw my mums bf his aggressive pose he had at the door dropped away. He was suddenly polite and cordial and left with little fuss once received his things. Never meet an abusive ex alone.

After he left my life i found out he had gotten onto my computer that was a christmas gift and had wrecked it beyond usable it quickly broke and i lost everything on it. All my musc and pictures and works. My computer wa my escap and coping mechanism for depression and anxiety. Same as my music. Im still struggling in life around men due to this and my son is strugling to learn to speak still.

Please be careful and never cut out people from your life because a partner says so. Friends and family mean more than someone you just met.

[skizmin]

minghao!soulmate au

prompt: if someone touches you, your soulmate feels warm where you’ve been touched and can sense how you feel about the contact (uncomfortable, calm etc;)

genre: fluff soooo much fluff, soulmates!au, very very brief and vague ment of sexual harassment its tiny pls dont be put off, college!au

a/n: hey minghao, i miss you, please rest lots and become healthy for seventeens next comeback!!

okay so

throughout your younger years youve never really paid much attention to your soulmate, ofc your parents told you when you were about four that the weird warm things you were feeling was your “one true love that you’ll meet later” and whatnot

i mean of course youd chuckle sometimes when your cheeks got all warm and an annoyed feeling fleetingly passed through you knowing your soulmate must be being coddled by one of his aunts or smth 

but other than that

you just went on with your life

it wasnt until you were sixteen did you start paying more attention to it

sometimes youd get a bit worried when youd feel a warm spot on your arm and a surge of slight anger in your heart but it was always quickly replaced by happiness

you knew it was his friends hitting him by then so you just chilled tf

even when you felt your ass became VERY warm, you felt the same anger/happiness flow through your body so you just shook the fact that your soulmates ass just got BEAt off and continued what you were doing. 

youll have junhui to thank for that later

so by the time you were going into university you had become very aware of the fact that your soulmate was barely ever getting hugs anymore

and you just :^((( poor bby

and an idea popped into your head like !!!

my soulmate feels warm when i get hugged akdfksjla

instantly you were like IM GONNA HUG EVERYONE!!!!! EVEN IF ITS AWKWARD

so like, first day on campus housing grounds you found your dorm house and with that your RA housemate

she was cool and you where like hhhhhhh

i barely know you but

i have this duty of care for my soulmate so im just gonna

and you hugged her rly big and you felt uncomfortable at first but also so proud of yourself like wow

get you a girl like me ;^))

anyway your housemate is like “oooooookay, this is your room here and its just us and three others who’re already here”

youre awkwardly like cool okay see u later

amd ur blushing rly hard but hey at least you did it

anyway fast forward a couple weeks and youre like hugging all your new friends everytime you see them and theyre like wow shes clingy but they still luv you

and youre!!

so!!

comfortable!!

abt doing it now like “hey hugs????? hugs are my shit.” ya feel?

cut over to minghao whos going to the same university as you with junhui

they both moved from china and minghao misses his fam so much :^(((

particuarly his mums hugs which he got all the time and sometimes he thought it was annoying but now hes like hhhh

MUM BRING ME BACK

minghaos mum was also rly open about haos soulmate and loved hearing about her

like one day hao came home (age 18???) fuming bc he felt his chest get warm in class and then his butt and a really strong feeling of fear and uncomfort and disgust filled him and he immediately knew what happened but he didnt feel anything else after that and he was so glad but still and his mum was like hao that happens to girls :^((( im sorry your soulmate must feel awful rn 

and hao felt sick in his stomach and he was like “im gonna kill anyone that does that to my soulmate again mum !!!!!!!!

and his mum was so proud

anyway hes almost fluent in korean by now and luckily junhui is good at making friends and found some that speak madarin and korean too so!!

their new friend jackson and some others are constantly with hao and hui being like “no that means square, this is how you say suspense” n shit

and hao learnt rly easily!! so did hui!! anyway

lately hao has been feeling his soulmate hug a lot of people lately and hed be rly happy except hes sorta 

“is my soulmate dating someone rn?? :^((” 

and hed remind himself you can date whoever you want before you meet him 

but hed still be all emo bc he wants love too and he misses his family and hes in a foreign country and hes failing one of his subjects bc how is he supposed to know all the non latin korean terms for all the flowers and plants they get pop quizzes on

and he just wants to hurry up and meet you bc hes all 

“everythings gonna be fine when i meet my soulmate!!!!!! theyre gonna make everything perfect for me!!!!!”

like, hao sweetie

calm down

but he’d be so determined like legit whenever junhui was with him and they were around people he’d be like JUNHUI TOUCH MY ARM

and he’d look around frantically for someone being like “tf my arm is warm gosh dang wonder what my soulmates up to lol” but he’d be a bit disappointed every time.

anyway tho so jackson invites him and junhui to his friend jaes party after teaching them all the korean slang shit

legit hes like

“guys. i think youre ready for your first party”

junhui nearly cries

little does he know youre??? invited to the same one by your housemate jimin (jyp gang here we go)

anyway you go to the party and are determined like legit hugging everyone you meet and jimins next to you like

im rly sorry about her dont ask

and minghaos in the kitchen like!!!! wth my soulmate keeps hugging people junhui smh smh 

he’s slightly buzzed and hella jealous

anyway he goes to the loungeroom for a sec to find his friend sicheng who just messaged that he was here 

and wow best luck ever you walk up to junhui and jae and meet them both!! youre all 

JAEE THANKS FOR HAVING THIS PARTY IM Y/N and you give him the biggest hug and then you turn to junhui whos all

hi im junhui

and smiling awkwardly and youre like

NICE TO MEET YOU!!!!!

and give him an even bigger hug than you gave jae and jae and jimin are watching you like wtf and junhuis like awkwardly patting your back and IN COMES MINGHAO WHOS GETTING SICHENG A DRINK

hes like jeSuS chRiSt how many time does she have to hug her s/o in the span of an hour!!!!!!!!

and he feels random extra warmth spurt on his back and hes like what sort bf/gf pats their s/os back lmao and then he seens you hugging junhui and he like

pauses for a second 

then hes like haha gtta be a coincidence that i can see a georgeous random stranger hugging my best friend in the same way i can feel my soulmate hugging someone rn

amd junui sees hao and a wave of relief passes over him and he grabs your shoulders and pushes you away like

MINGHAO HEY!!

and you turn around as junhuis like “this is y/n, friend of a friend of jacksons ad jaes”

and minghaos like HOLY SHIT I FELT THAT MY SHOULDERS JUST GREW WARM

and then you meet eyes with the most goRGEOUS boy youve ever seen like HOW can someone look like that

and as soon as you meet eyes your body just gets soWARM and your heart like

fuckin swells and shit

and youre like ohmygodohmygod whats happening

and hes looking at you with the widest eyes ever and everyones like “wow they must find each other pretty hot theyre just staring at each other”

and suddenly minghao grabs sichengs hand and just places it on his chest and sichengs like wtf no homo

and you feel warmth on your chest and a surge of shock, excitement and hopefulness rush through your blood but the first thing you say is

WTF YOU PERV as youre grabbing your chest and junhui finally catches on and walks up and pokes you in the stomach and you yelp and minghao just touches the warm spot on his stomach and smiles SO wide

he legit runs up to you like OHMYGOD YOURE MY SOULMATE TELL ME EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU IVE DREAMT OF MEETING YOU MY WHOLE LIFE 

and he goes to hug you but stops himself

by now everyones gone to give you some privacy 

and youre like wot!!!!! hug me!!!!!!

but he just says “dont you have a partner?? im not doing anything with you until you and them break up” he ain no homewrecker sweeties no cheating in this household

and youre just like

????????? what ?????????

“youre always hugging your partner!! its hard not t notice, youre so proud after too :^(((”

and you start laughing

hes just pouting at you like whattttttttttttt

you say in between laughs

im hugging people for you!!! you havent been getting hugs lately, and i like it when you get hugs i love the feeling so i thought id hug a bunch of people so you could feel warm anf fuzzy inside!!!

he looks at you like,,,,,, oh,,,,,,

and then he swoops you into the biggest bear hug ever and you feel warm and fuzzy except its not the same. it feels so

so real??????

you almost start crying and then he pulls away looking teary eyed too

“y/n was it??? im minghao. and im looking forward to hugging you and being with you for the rest of my life.”

youve never smiled wider as you jumped into him and gave him your first kiss while thinking of how great your future was gonna be.

fin.

hope yall liked that shit!!!!!!