#the way aaron talks about katelyn has me dead

[atlalasassy]

Hot girls aren’t normal about the All For the Game bonus chapters in the rainbow crate editions

[minyard-05]

hi, me again.

neil josten deserves some of the hate and i'm not kidding

CW: abuse, child abuse + neglect, aaron's whole backstory

now, prefacing this by saying: i LIKE neil. i also recognise that he's a complete dick. i am also fully aware that i am the only person who thinks/cares about aaron minyard this much. i ALSO recognise that i have made this post 4 times already but i'm making it again

SO. i present page 236 of TKM

this scene was over the line even for neil

allow me to *cracks knuckles* Explain.

there are two foxes who, i think, would be able to actually somewhat understand what aaron's life growing up with his mother was like, and those two are wymack and renee. wymack grew up with a bad father who hit him and killed his mother, and renee grew up with her mother and her mother's boyfriends, who are all described as being heavy handed. what pisses me off the most about this scene in particular, among other neil & aaron interactions, is that neil implies that aaron could've stood up to his mother and he didn't.

aaron's mother died when he was fifteen. he had no siblings living with him, no dad, and nicky says he got involved with some bad stuff once he got to columbia, all of which points to aaron being almost entirely isolated as a kid. isolated from everyone except for his mother, who was neglectful before she got violent, but even still, that neglect would bear scars of its own. aaron probably had to learn to cook before he was tall enough to reach the kitchen counter. aaron probably had to walk himself home from school when he was too small to see over cars before crossing the road. aaron probably had to lie to his teachers when they asked to call his mother, had to forge her signature on permission slips, had to learn to shoplift young so he could still eat when they didn't have any money. and then he would have to learn how to clean a cut without it getting infected, because he couldn't go to a hospital. he would have to think about long sleeves and baggy shirts to cover up bruises, he would have to learn how to lie quickly if anybody asked why he was limping slightly, he would have to figure out any possible way to keep people from finding out what was happening, because the alternative was that he'd get taken away, and then he'd really be alone. and that's scary. when you're twelve, the prospect of losing your mom is scary. even after everything, he still didn't know what to do without her. he loved her because there was literally nobody else in his life he could love. and he was a kid.

aaron was a kid and he was scared, and 90% of his actions/reactions to things throughout the books are the actions of a kid who didn't get to do anything other than grow up too fast and now he doesn't know what to do. considering the above scene i cited is immediately after Happy Birthday Junior, aaron's reaction (which is directly confronting neil about wtf is going on) is completely justified! because another reminder that all of the trilogy is in neil's first year of PSU, but aaron and the others have been through the aftermath of kevin signing with them (which we know meant a lot of threats, fights, and other bad shit), with the addition of general Fox drama. and aaron has NO idea what's going on. all he knows is that this random kid from arizona seems dead-set on pissing off riko moriyama, one of their teammates is dead, somebody put a dead fox in their car, and now somebody broke into their locker room and filled neil's locker with blood. so, naturally, aaron's asking what the fuck is happening.

ok so now i am not 100% sure where exactly i was going with this, i am still sick and have a very short attention span so my TLDR is this: when aaron punches neil in the corridor after neil talks to katelyn (even though that happened before this), neil kind of had it coming. also i personally believe aaron deserves to punch neil just one more time. he's earned it

[eego0]

Part 2 of the rant and why I have a problem with Laurance in MCD season 2

Don’t get me wrong, I understand why Laurance is outwardly jealous in season 2. He thought he secured Aphmau and it seems like she reciprocated his feelings for awhile. It was only natural that he got angry. The problem became a problem when he endangered (physically and mentally) the people he SWORE to protect because he got jealous.

I’ll go into why Laurance being plain mean to Aphmau about a relationship he knew NOTHING about was so upsetting after I cover the endangering of his loved ones.

1.) We’re gonna start at the end and work our way backwards- when he made the decision to not only JOIN THE SHADOW KNIGHTS IN THE NETHER (obviously it’s not that cut and dry since he was a rebel and actively doing things to piss off Shad and make his life more difficult), BUT LET OUT THE TWO PRISONERS OF PHEONIX DROP THAT HAD PROVEN TIME AND TIME AGAIN TO BE LETHAL. He could’ve left Pheonix Drop without letting out Sasha, the woman who tried to kill Aphmau’s infant son because he was a descendant LOOOONG down the Irene bloodline, and Michi, the woman who not only drugged and sold Aphmau, Katelyn, AND LAURANCE HIMSELF to werewolves that were either going to marry them off or kill them, BUT THE SAME WOMAN WHO KIDNAPPED APHMAU’S SONS AND WIFE TO TRAFFICK THEM….

Now this next part is going to be the longest section in this rant so buckle in if you plan to keep reading!!

2.) One of the scenes that makes me feel PRIMAL rage for MCD Aphmau is when she had to kill an imp that impersonated her DEAD lover and the father of her adopted child. She’s sitting on the alliance island beach with his bandanna in hand, still very shaken up. This situation happens after FINALLY she’s finally begun adjusting to life without Aaron once again, but her progress feels useless since her heart was plucked out of her chest and stomped on at his brutal reappearance. This is when Laurance feels the need to interrogate her on why she cares so much that Aaron is dead.

I don’t give a FUCK about all of the defenses people make for Laurance. “He’s a shadow knight!” “He couldn’t control his words!” “The calling made him more jealous/angry/unpredictable!” “He kissed her first!” “He liked Aphmau at first sight and she reciprocated his feelings at one point so his question was valid!” - It doesn’t matter what kind of relationship he thought Aphmau and Aaron had. It doesn’t matter if Laurmau didn’t go through in canon and he was upset. Laurance KNEW Aphmau and Aaron were friends. They lived in the same house and took care of Lilith together. They bonded over being lords and found comfort in each other when they couldn’t find comfort in anyone else. They were good friends to the public eye, and Laurance was a part of the public eye, though he saw them as more than good friends since he had a reason to pay extra attention. Point is, he only REALLY knew what Aphmau told him (outside of his inference) and she was set on keeping her relationships to herself. No matter what he thought their relationship was, he was being an asshole and had no right to talk to her like she was overreacting when she had a completely valid grief response to her friend DYING.

HE WASN’T EVEN THERE IN THE VILLAGE WHEN AARON DIED… HE WASNT THERE TO SEE THE DRAMATIC REVEAL OF AARONS SWORD AND BANDANNA IN THE HANDS OF GARROTH, THEIR BEST FRIEND THAT THEYD BEEN TRYING SAVE SINCE THE VERY BEGINNING OF SEASON 2. HE WAS ON A SPIRITUAL JOURNEY THAT HE TOLD NOBODY ABOUT. THEN HE SHOWS UP AND HAS THE GALL TO ASK HER WHY SHE WAS “making such a big fuss” OVER AARON AND HAVING TO KILL HIM WHEN AN IMP TOOK HIS FORM?

In any case, Aphmau would’ve likely reacted the way she did had it been anyone else in her group who died, but in that situation, at least Aaron would’ve been able to help her through the hurt and empathize with her emotions. Nobody else could talk to her on that kind of emotional level without expecting something back. But no, god forbid Aphmau ever feel any emotion aside from happiness and hope. She can have anger, but only the motivational kind that led armies. God forbid she chose her own love. That would dampen the mood and ruin the narrative everyone needed her to follow.

3.) Hyria’s forest. Aphmau is tired, pissed off, and scared. She’s spent days acting as a thief to get information on her son’s and wife’s whereabouts only to find out they’ve been taken out of the area and brought back around a village that’s close to their home. She knows they’re in danger and with Michi, the woman who trafficked her and her friends. She KNOWS the same fate or worse is going to fall on her family if she doesn’t find them in time. She’s in Narahka Village which has EXPLODED into chaos over the Tu’la invasion going into their nextdoor neighbor, O’khasis. And she can’t find Aaron. She just BARELY found Vlyad and they decided on their route home through a forest that people are KNOWN to get stranded in. And Aaron is missing.

Laurance was already upset that Aphmau was looking for Vlyad but he REALLY wanted to escape once she brought up Aaron (I definitely understand why he was pushing to leave since there were armed troops marching to Narahka but he also knows that Aphmau would gladly put herself in danger to save a friends. He’d do the same thing). Aphmau knows that she last saw Aaron in the ruins of Falcon Claw and he was out of it, but she doesn’t know if he’s still there.

She says, “Laurance, I can’t lose him!”

He replies, “I can’t lose you!”

They get to the edge of the forest and Aphmau is still frantically looking around to see if Aaron’s caught up. Laurance and Katelyn point out her behavior.

Laurance asks if she’s even paying attention to their planning knowing she’s preoccupied with her thoughts about Aaron’s whereabouts.

FINALLY, Aaron dashes through the forest and Aphmau calls out to him, running up to him just thankful that he’s okay. He says he knows a place to go.

Laurance stops Aphmau for this conversation that I’m going to transcribe here as a refresher for everyone:

———

L: What was all that about? The whole “worrying about Aaron” thing?

A: I was glad to see him..? I was incredibly worried about his safety.

L: So going up to him and practically embracing him is how you show that?

A: What..? Nothing even happened! Does it even matter?

L: I don’t like you getting so close to him.

A: wait. Are you- Are you jealous?

L: I wont lie, yes. It makes no sense.

A: First off Laurance, I don’t see why that’s any of your Business. I understand that you’re my guard, however, you allowed me to join a thieves guild and didn’t get upset, yet one small sign of friendly affection towards Aaron and suddenly you’re questioning my motives?

L: I just think you should be careful around him is all.

A: you don’t have any idea of who he is or what he’s been through, so I would appreciate it if you kept your jealousy to yourself on this one.

L: Hmph

A: Just remember what happened last time you got jealous Laurance, and the promise that you made me.. what’s going on?

L: It’s nothing, I’m sorry..it’s just, this situation is really stressful. The fact that you embraced Aaron and before that were obsessed with finding Vlyad…I don’t see why you need to care about any of them.

A: I think you’re letting your emotions get to you right now. Just know that if it were you, I’d do the same thing. i…know that we’ve shared some moments in the past, but my life isn’t as easy as just caring about a few people. Now, enough of this bickering, we’ll talk about this later.

——

I get it. People are into the possessive lover thing. Part of Laurance’s development is how he progressively gets more possessive as the calling gets worse. His coping mechanism for staying human is imagining a world where his perfect life is reality. We’ve all been there. But it’s an issue, and I’ll stand by Aphmau any day of the week defending her right to have other friends and find new love. She doesn’t owe anything to Laurance, which people on the Laurmau side of the fandom don’t consider often and fight with me about a LOT. Laurance became a Shadow Knight to buy Aphmau time in the nether during season 1. He died. But HE MADE THAT CHOICE. APHMAU DOESNT OWE HIM HER LIFE BECAUSE HE MADE THE CHOICE TO BUY HER AND CASTOR TIME. And you know what, even if she did, she repayed that debt by thought, action, and word every chance she got after he was out and safe. THATS WHY THEIR FRIENDSHIP WAS BEAUTIFUL! THEY SAVED EACH OTHER A LOT AND REPAYED EACH OTHER EVERY TIME!

Final thoughts (as of rn):

I love Laurance’s character as much as the next person. He’s charming, flirty, sweet, and has a VERY interesting downward spiral. Him and Aphmau would’ve made a good couple had they been official, but they weren’t. Aphmau reasonably fell in love with someone that made her feel stable and could truly empathize with/get through to her, which is important to remember.

It really bothers me how hard people in the fandom defend him even after seeing how he talked to Aphmau after Aaron died but even before. “It was justified!” Mmmkay..

To any Laurance lovers who’ve stumbled upon this post, I love him too, but understand that I can’t physically bring myself to love him more than my pookie bear Aaron💕💕💕 (please don’t dox me if you don’t agree🥺🙏🔥🔥🔥)/Lh

Thank you again for reading all of this and hearing me if you got this far- I love you all very much<3

[belonareyna]

A study on Aaron Minyard

He is not homophobic out of Nora's extra content (where she just drops the Andrew Minyard is misogynist and Aaron is homophobic and I still don't get why. Where is this in the book? WHERE? I have read it three times and I have no proofs of this. But I haven't read all of Nora's extra content so it might be there)

He is uncomfortable of Nicky's sexual comments NOT with Nicky's sexuality

I wanted to punch him in the face when he talked to Neil after Baltimore in the house BUT I get that he was mad, angry and really worried about Andrew: Andrew had been abused literally months ago (not to mention his childhood). And then this mafia kid who lies more than he talks is dating/fucking his brother? Oh baby the Minyard twins protection to each other is TWISTED don't get mad at Aaron for being a shit to Neil while you protect Andrew who literally did the same thing to Katelyn.

I don't think he had used homophobic language towards anyone (I might be mistaken in this one bc English is not my first language and I read the books in English)

He is punished for "choosing" Tilda over Andrew by the Fandom. Yeah. Cool, cool, cool. Years of abuse and psychological trauma ended just like that when Andrew killed Tilda. Men WTF? Aaron's relationship with his mother was horrible. But you can't expect that Aaron who just had meet Andrew, and didn't knew how seriously he took his promises was going to accept that he murdered her mother so he wouldn't be hurted anymore. He hadn't even got time to forgive himself.

Hey! Tilda is dead, my brother killed him, he was in the car with her, he could have died too. My mother is dead. No more hits. No more screams. My brother could have died too. My brother had KILLED OUR MOM TO PROTECT ME. IT'S MY FAULT. LIKE EVERY BLOW I RECIEVE FROM HER. IT'S MY FAULT. MY BROTHER KILLED MY MOM AND IT'S MY FAULT. If it's not clear, Tilda is dead, so it seems like a good idea to lock Aaron, an addict who just received an impact change in his life in a bathroom and let him deal with withdrawal. Yep. Not traumatizing at all

Why did he extended his deal with his bother? Maybe because he wanted to stick around with Andrew, because he wanted to have a relationship with his brother and he knew/think the only way he could do that was if there was a deal on the table.

He killed Drake. And he couldn't see his brother after that. My brother has been abused. My brother has been abused at least till he was 12. I have killed his abuser. Does he care for me? He is asking me if I'm OK. He was the one raped and he is asking me if I'm OK? Is he OK? No, how can he be? How can I be OK? He is going to the hospital. But I'm going to the police station. He is gone.

"Is this going to be an ongoing thing? I need to know how to plan around you." "No," Andrew said. Aaron flicked him an irritated look. "Yes."

He is making an actual effort to bond with his twin. And I'm not saying Andrew doesn't care about Aaron. He fucking loves him. More than himself. He loves him and I'm not saying any other thing. But he is giving his brother the ice treatment. And Aaron just wants the ice to melt. And he is trying.

Neil Josten. In less than a year he is capable of making Andrew interested. He can make Andrew FEEL something. A task where Aaron had failed. And Aaron knows something. If Neil dies, Andrew will die with him. And isn't is sad and terrible? To know that you are NOT ENOUGH for your brother to try to stay alive

All of this said I have to say I love Andrew Minyard and this wasn't a comparison between the twins. We kind of understand Andrew and Andrew's reasons towards everything because the books are written through Neil's point of view and Andrew shares with him more than he had ever shared with anybody. But Aaron doesn't know a lot of things and can't understand his brother just as quick as Neil because he doesn't have all the information and because he is not Neil, he is a completely different human being with a completely different line of thoughts.

It's two in the morning and yesterday I've sleep only for four hours. So I think this post is less objective and more my thoughts than I would have like it to be. But that's what editing is for.

Love and hope you like it

[itscloudsocks]

Guide to my AFTG stories!

Hello! I haven´t been active at all on tumblr but maybe that´ll change now that I wrote a few stories and am looking for new ideas or inspiration! Here´s a little guide that I´ll hopefully remember to keep updated with whatever l´ll write next :)

Please check the end notes of all stories before reading them, the topics will be listed :) 

Paint me a picture of you

~ Chapters 8/8 (completed 2022-05-10)

~ 20.525 words

~ Neil/Andrew

~ Summary: 

After spraining his wrist, Neil is off-court for four weeks. It doesn´t take long for him to start spiraling down. Luckily there´s Andrew and his new interest in painting to keep him afloat. Still, nightmares suck and his wrist is a constant reminder that the yakuza can take him out whenever they want.[Or: Neil has a bad couple of weeks and Andrew does whatever he can to take care of him.]

590% 

~ Chapter 1/1 (completed 2022-04-19)

~ 2.187 words

~Neil/Andrew

~ Summary:

Neil gets a mullet. Andrew doesn't know how to act.

[Or: Andrew has one long gay panic over the course of two days before deciding what to do.]

~ Inspired by the incredible peachykun.art on instagram (Reference)

Show me your world, Oh brother

~ Chapter 1/1 (completed 2022-04-28)

~ 3.541 words

~ Aaron/Katelyn, Aaron & Andrew

~ Summary:

Aaron still has nightmares about the trial and everything that happened with Drake. Katelyn tries her best to be there for him. Andrew hates him, they talk, they don´t yell at each other- does that count as a success?

A Reason To Hold On 

~ Series (4/4, completed 2022-10-22)

~ Summary: 

AJ meets Margo and Andrew meets Neil.

They go from hating to tolerating to accepting to enjoying to needing each other. 

AJ meets Margo (Part 1)

~ Chapter 1/1

~ 7.384 words

~ Summary:

Andrew has not always been Andrew the same way Neil has not always been Neil. When they meet as children, they are AJ and Margo, one in the foster system and one on the run. Help and trust is crucial for the both of them but when the ghosts of the past come too close, Neil has to make a choice: stay with Andrew and endanger him or leave the first friend he has ever had to keep him safe.

Andrew meets Neil (Part 2)

~ Chapters 2/2

~ 12.884 words

~ Summary:

Neil survived years of the run, his father and the FBI. The next step is a college degree in maths. With the help of Matt and Dan he feels like more of a person but then he meets an angry short man infront of Eden´s and everything goes downhill from there. Margo was never supposed to be more than a shadow of his past, one of his roles. But Andrew is determined to find out the truth.

The Thing About Cats

~ Chapters 3/3

~ 9.602 words

~ Summary:

From enemies to friends to roommates Andrew has to face two problems that could very well change his mundane, jobless life.

Problem number one: Neil desperately wants a cat.

Problem number two: Andrew has everything but negative feelings about his new roommate.

Everything´s well with Kevin Day

~ Chapters 8/8

~ 21,532 words

~ Summary:

Kevin is crashing, nobody knows why. But Andrew and Neil are determined to find out. There´s a lot of digging in the past and hating on dead people.

It was just a little fall

~ Chapter 1/1 

~ 5,706 words 

~ Summary:

Alternative title: Just a sprain (Nothing to worry about)

Neil slips and hides his injury for the sake of Exy (Andrew is not happy about it).

You didn´t come back

~ Chapter 1/1

~ 6,320 words

~ Summary:

Neil is back, scars barely healed and memories fresh. And yet it is not Neil who breaks. It´s Andrew.

Soundtrack

~ Series (ongoing)

~ Summary:

A collection of fics inspired by songs.

Fine

~ Chapter 1/1

~ 5,561 words

~ Summary:

An insight of Neil "I´m Fine" Josten, three times he´s struggling and one time Andrew helps him relax.

With you I´m less alone

~ Chapter 1/1

~ 3,079 words

~ Summary:

The anniversary of Riko is coming up and Jean reflects on his life so far. Jeremy is there to comfort him.

Feverish Minds

~ Chapter 1/1 

~ 5,757 words

~ Summary:

Andrew comes down with a nasty cold which, considering the fact that covid is a very real thing, is unfortunate timing. Luckily Neil is there to keep a watchful eye.

I find comfort in your clothes

 ~ Chapter 1/1

~ 4,277 words

~ Summary:

Three times Neil steals clothes from the Foxes and one time he doesn´t have to steal.

Kevin Day appreciation hour

~ Series (ongoing)

Comfort Crowd

~ Chapter 1/1

~ 3,523 words

~ Summary:

What´s better than a Fox cuddle pile?

Kevin Day in the middle.

A Troubled Mind

~ Chapter 1/1

~ 8,512 words

~ Summary:

Kevin Day takes a "Am I gay?" quiz and finds comfort in unexpected places.

Talk to Me

~ Chapter 1/1

~ 3,958 words

~ Summary:

Kevin and Seth are happy and safe from a particularly insane Exy fanatic trying to make their lives harder. Still, Kevin struggles with his self-worth as Seth´s boyfriend. Seth being Seth, does everything he can to bring his boyfriend out of dark places and difficult memories.

This was a gift for my lovely friend @thefoxesraven! Go ask them about Seth and make them happy!

Busyhead

~ Chapter 1/1

~ 13,937 words

~ Summary:  Kevin is alone for the weekend. He gets visited by Riko and Nicky and finds light in even the darkest places.

Third wheeling

~ Chapters 5/ (ongoing)

~ currently on hiatus

~ Summary:

Kevin and Neil are happy, have been happy for the past three, almost four years. Then, with a new season comes a new goalie. Andrew Minyard. Followed are questioned feelings, confused conversations and crumbling self-esteem.

The Cursed And The Gifted

~ Series (ongoing)

~ Summary:

Cursed and haunted by his fathers men, Neil is ready to slip away once more. Then, he meets Kevin, a face from the past with a similar problem and Andrew, an asshole that can´t seem to stay out of Neil´s business. And if he wants it or not, Neil will have to face his problems face first if he wants to get out of this mess alive.

some wounds need more than time

~ chapters 10/ 

~ Summary:

For years has Neil been running. Just as he´s thinking of slowly settling down in his little cabin in the forest, a face from the past visits and he gets sucked into a world he wanted to forget. Through blood and bruises, trauma and curses he meets people that have the power to change his life forever, for better or for worse.

[garrothromeave]

the hell is mystreet season 6??

(warning, long post ahead)

ok so before i start this

1) ive never posted shiiiit on tumblr before so watch me suffer, im just here to talk about stuff that my friends who dont know anything about aphmau have to listen to me rant about for hours on end

2) i havent seen mystreet in like years (except season 3, i watch that frequently since im laurance and shadow knight deprived) so please bear with me because i might be completely wrong on this lol. it’s just like, pointing out things i remember

3) im sure someones already talked about this but who cares

4) im gonna do this stupid thing where i just explain myself a bit at first, if you dont want to read that just skip to the part where you see “the actual thingy:” in bold and italics 

5) mild disclaimer; i am completely aware that jessica is not a professional writer. i know that she did her best to appeal to her fans, and honestly, respect for that. while this post will come off as aggressive and probably look like hate, that’s not my intention in the slightest. it’s just... intense criticism. im sure y’all probably already know that, but yeah, just stating that anyways. i do believe that jess is doing her best, and in no way do i want to dismiss any hard work she’s done. that being said; prepare for a very strongly opinionated post.

haha watch there be 10000+ typos in this making me look like a complete dumbass

ok here we go 

one of the main reasons i stopped watching aphmau back in 2017 was the mess that was season 4. like, in the first few episodes of the emerald secret, i thought “woah!! this is kinda cool, im a sucker for mystery!” because of course i was, it was something new and something exciting. the only problem i had with it at the time was kim, but that’s just because i always found her annoying and out of place. i just didn’t understand why garroth dragged her along and honestly i still don’t to this day BUT, moving on.

anyways, as the season progressed, 13 year old me was of course just “:0!!” the entire time--that is, up until the reveal of the main villain. i remember watching the episode, seeing the reveal of ein, and then stopping. like, just for a quick break, but i was still just overwhelmingly disappointed. like, and this was the time when pdh was airing and ein just got made alpha (i think?) and i had really really liked eins character in pdh. either way, that really sucked and actually opened my eyes to a lot of things.

one of the main things bein’ the fact that this was supposed to be a slice of life kinda series that decided to take a turn to a more edgy kinda approach. which, i guess i regularly wouldnt mind? but seeing as mcd was kinda bein neglected at the time it just didnt sit right with me. BUT WHATEVER, point is i stopped watching mystreet all together at the end of season 4.

like, a whole year later my brother tells me that shit’s getting intense in season 5 + 6 of mystreet, and my brilliant self decided to give it a shot--but i refused to watch all of season 5, so i only stepped in when ein made an appearance. so whenever that was, that’s where i picked up because i didnt care enough to see 

and y’know--i honestly didn’t hate it at first. in fact, i found it oddly cool. it wasn’t enough to get me into aphmau again, but it was enough to where i was intrigued. i dont know why, but i never watched the finale, so i didnt see the ending until just a few weeks ago--but back then, i thought it was neat. looking back on it however... im just so confused. 

side note: only got back into aphmau this time around because of mcd. mainly because like, i adore the first season and the first half of the second season. and being nearly 18 now, im a lot more appreciative of plot and well-written characters n junk. 

the actual thingy:

ok back on track. imma stop spilling out my story of how i got back into aphmau, and lets just skip to what rewatching mcd made me realize of season 6′s plot and shit:

-emmalyn. how the fuck does ghost even remotely exist? if she’s emmalyn as claimed, then why have we already seen emmalyn in the mystreet universe alive? look i get that creators can do whatever they want with their stories but at the same time please provide some sort of explanation good god. and maybe they did and i just havent seen it, so if there is one--let me know. but until that day imma just sit here confused as fuck

-ok so imma just be real, the whole ‘ultima’ thing is just... not great. in my opinion, anyways. like... i saw someone mention this in another post, but if this ultima stuff was like, a really big deal, why isnt it mentioned in mcd? though i suppose since its a curse of sorts, it could be later on past the time period in which mcd takes place--but even then, how did it manage to make its way into aaron’s family bloodline? 

-WHY IS EVERYONE AT STARLIGHT ITS JUST SO CONVINIENT like what happened to this place being the most expensive shit on the planet or whatever, and how the gang happens to run into like, the werewolf trio and blaze and kai and guy and nate all of these people like god damn life doesnt WORK LIKE THAT 

-im sorry but turning people into relics? thats... thats the best you could come up with? plus, like, how does that even work? in mcd it’s established that relics are separate entitles that choose their wielder, based on a ‘personal’ connection (being a descendent of a previous wielder) or if they’re a good match personality and (i think?) moral wise. so the whole turning-people-into-relics doesnt make much sense to be honest. 

-irene really over here using her god powers to only keep her friends alive like god damn not a great god if you ask me 

-can i talk about how incredibly predictable aphmaus death was? like i just kinda sat there waiting for it to happen and when it did i literally went “haha! wonder when she’ll be revived” because god forbid we actually kill off characters 

-when aphmau + demon warlock fought in the irene dimension there was no passage of time whatsoever in the real world whiiiiiiiiich really bothers me because they fought in there for at least a few minutes

-speaking of aphmau and the demon warlocks fight does it bother anyone else that it had to be aaron who took over the fight?? like we get it hes the big protector blah blah blah but god damn it wouldve been cooler if aphmau had fought this battle as her. aaron fighting this battle was so underwhelming

-...love. like, thats the only thing thats needed to break out of a forever potion? love? LIKE YEAH, GOOD GUYS GOTTA WIN SOMEHOW, but its just so cliche and overdoneeee

-oh yeah and also when travis went bonkers and became the demon warlock or whatever, why’d he only take over katelyn and garroth?? like, zane had been influenced by the potions in the past as well? DONT GET ME WRONG--i do love some good brother edge, but uh, the demon warlock was just bein kinda a dumbass by not possessing zane too just sayin’

-can aaron please go to fucking jail for mass murder now like holy shit, he just got sent home on a fuckin boat. also why did blaze forgive him for killing him thats not even remotely realistic. then again, nothing in mystreet has ever been realistic when it comes to characters and motives and personalities, (cough katelyn being actually abusive and travis being an actual pervert) but yknow whatever

-katelyn and kawaii chan literally added nothing to the plot whatsoever. like lets be real, katelyn lost her personality the moment season 5 started and kawaii chan just kinda sits there :I

-ok im sorry this was bound to come up but cmon guys imagine laurances potential if he was in season 6 like god damn this is beyond maddening. AND YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A REALLY REALLY COOL PARRALLEL?? IF IT WAS LAURANCE WHO SNAPPED GARROTH OUT OF HIS MIND CONTROL THING, because it would mimic laurance’s speech to get garroth to snap out of his rage in season 1, episode 100 of minecraft diaries. like how fuckin rad would that have been? missed opportunity 

-also?? why does kim/ghost know magicks?? like, if i remember correctly, emmalyn is a scholar--not someone who knew magicks. i mean, i guess research? study?? but its been established that knowing how magicks works =/= being able to use magicks. i dunno, just doesnt seem right i guess. maybe its explained, i wouldnt know (yes i know that makes me look like a dick leave me alone)

-melissa should have stayed dead. LIKE, NO, ITS NOT AS SIMPLE AS “haha it takes more than a few bullets to kill me”??? look ive got nothing wrong with melissa (cough lie cough) but yknow it would have just been cool a character... stay dead? for once? its just too fuckin cliche that shes alive god damn

-can i also just say the only good thing that came out of season 6 was travis’ dads sacrifice like damn that made me actually sad

-howww was lucinda turned into a relic. or yknow, anyone else? like im sure they explain it better in the actual show i just dont remember, but its just that easy? turning anyone into a relic? granted, a normal person wouldnt be able to produce a good relic, but idk man. IM JUST SAYING; that the only really powerful relics that aphmau should have been able to wield is the one that aaron + zane produced because shad relic and esmund relic moment. lucinda isnt even like, connected to a divine warrior. ALSO, another point, if its seriously that powerful of a relic getting one from just a magic user like lucinda, why go through the trouble? i mean i guess ofc youd want the “all powerful” one that the ultima produces but i mean damn whats the point

-ok this is just going to bother me but in one of the episodes (i think might have been in season 5 actually) where that like, guardian dude was chasing aphmau and zane and at one point they split up and the dude just chuckles at zane diverting paths and goes under his breath “youre not the important one here”, suggesting that aphmau somehow is? first of all, id argue that any ro’meave is significantly more important than aphmau was, especially not knowing much about her other than that shes with aaron. i might be missing some bits an pieces, but if i was that dude id forget about aphmau and go after zane 

-killing off derek for shock factor sucked, and i know the moment was supposed to be really sad because like “oh :( aarons dad is sacrificing himself for his son” but lets be real dereks still was a shitty father and i dont think his reasons for doing what he did was very good at all

-less about plot or more like: why the absolute fuck did the gang bring kim along instead of, oh i dont know, a life-long friend? like, laurance or dante maybe?? im sure its explained, i never saw aphmaus year or most of season 5, but god DAMN id hate to be apart of this friend group AND GOD LIKE, imagine reconnecting with an old friend who ends up getting closer to your best friends and taking priority in their lives over you (cough laurance) like god damn lol

-im just going to preface this one with: i dont remember everything that’s happened, so if im wrong i apologize in advance--but (you actually can correct me if im wrong and please do) didnt like, irene reincarnate her friends in order to give them better lives? I DONT KNOW IF THIS IS TRUE, ITS JUST WHAT I REMEMBER--however, if im correct, then:

a. why the hell would she bring back someone like zane, or gene, or ivy, etc.

b. why the hell do they all have the same exact names? first and last? again, im aware that the whole mystreet+mcd tie wasn’t originally supposed to be there, but i dont think that means such a coincidence can be excused? its just a bit much if you ask me.

c. why the hell is the fact that (as much as i literally hate this) aaron is a decedent of shad being ignored? like, you’d think that something like this would be something thats actually important, or something the demon warlock couldve taken advantage of. or are we completely erasing every other connections to divine warriors besides aphmau + irene? because even if irene did reincarnate them or do whatever it is she did, does she even have the power to sever the connections between them and their ancestors? my guess is, no.

d. speaking of irene why on earth was aphmau able to talk to/see irene, they’re literally the same person are they not? did she like, fuckin reincarnate herself without actually doing it?? BUT--i will give it to them, the demon warlock did refer to aphmau as something along the lines of being “one of the 3 parts of her broken soul” or something like that. however, my point still remains. also what are the other two did i miss that or is it never explained

now; if irene in fact did not ‘reincarnate’ her friends then please ignore that little bit right there :)

but yes, those are a few of the problems i have with season 6 off the top of my head. i would go into like, season 4 and 5 more as well, but i honestly didnt feel like it. at some point i might go into other things, like how important laurance could have been to the plot of these later seasons, or HELL, even dante. i might also go into what could have made season 4, 5, and 6 actually good--maybe... a rewrite? perhaps? but im getting too far ahead of myself, so i just leave you with this for now.

and i know that as soon as i post this 15 more things are just going to pop into my head BUT im going to try and not edit this post because why stress myself with that even more

anyways thank you for coming to my tedtalk 

[91percentpynch]

kevin day as a singer/ songwriter

IT‘S KEVIN DAY BITCHES YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS - originally this was supposed to be a kevin day writing songs, soft wholesome au thingy, it ended up in kevaaron angst with a happy ending. but i put conan gray songs out of kevin‘s point of view as a bonus??? so it‘s still singer/ songwriter kevin??

kevin day has always loved music. he loved it when his mother sang him lullabies when he couldn‘t sleep, when they danced around the kitchen screaming the words to the song from the radio on the top of their lungs, loved it when she taught him how to play the piano and the guitar.

but like every other good thing evermore took this from him, once they snatched him and burried him alive. riko hated music, so naturally it was forbidden for all of them. no happiness, no light. only ever exy, exy, exy.

don‘t get it wrong, kevin loved exy. he was the son of exy. kayleigh found exy, kayleigh gave it to him, it was in his blood. it was in his soul. and it brought him closer to his beloved mother, to the woman who made his life good, who gave him light and happiness and left him back alone. gave him to them.

however just as exy was in his blood, so was music. so whenever he was alone with his partner he would quietly hum or sing a song his mother used to sing him.

when jean moreau arrived at the nest hell broke out. riko was jealous because kevin would spend more time with the new kid than him. kevin wouldn‘t give the king enough attention so all of his subjects had to suffer.

it got worse with every passing day, with every look that lasted just a second too long, with every conversation whispered softly in french, with every lullaby kevin would sing for jean when he was scared, with every embrace and late night talk. with every stolen kiss, they had to pay. well, jean had to pay. kevin had to remain untouched, no scar was allowed to be visible on his perfect face, on his hands or any body part visible. jean however? jean was never allowed to leave the nest, he was riko‘s, he belonged to riko like some doll he could stab or kick or do whatever he felt like to.

the day kevin told riko to stop, was the day riko lost his patience. kevin day got better in exy, he took his favourite toy away from him, he had the audacity to talk against his king.

kevin always knew riko was unpredictable when he was angry, that the world was just black and red when he was mad with anger, but he never in a million years thought that this anger would ever be against him. that he would have to feel what jean felt every single day.

but he did this day, when riko broke his hand. it was also the day when kevin decided that it was time for them to leave. for both of them, jean and him.

„we‘re going“, he whispered in french when he came back to their shared dorm room. „we‘re leaving. you and me. my father, wymack, he has an exy team on his own. the foxes. we‘re going to join them. because i will not leave you here, understood?“

„we can‘t go, he will find me and while he cannot kill you, he certainly can kill me. no one really cares about me, anyways“, jean replied.

„oh is that so? well i for that matter care about you, you beautiful french bastard and now take your five things and we‘re going“

„kevin, we can‘t. not both of us. that‘s way too suspicious“, jean tried to reason.

„darling, it‘s more suspicous when i go alone, now come. we don‘t have much time. riko will look for you soon, if he doesn‘t already. i know the way out, maybe, if we‘re fast we can go to a more growded place before he catches up on us, maybe we can even reach the bus or a taxi before he comes. we have to try, we cannot stay here. i for once must go to the hospital, the bastard broke my playing hand“

„i‘ll make sure he won‘t come after you, you go. go and forget me. go and leave me alone. it‘s only a few more months before i go, only a few more months before it‘s all over. you don‘t have to watch that. just, go“, jean said, his voice tired and filled with emotion.

„i will get you out of here and you will give live a chance. i promis you will see the sun again“, kevin replied, tears running down his cheeks as he leaned in for one last kiss. „i love you“, he whispered into the darkness as he turned to go. kevin never heard the reply, he wasn‘t sure he wanted to.

so kevin tiptoed to the backdoor and left. just like that. until this day he didn‘t know what jean had to go through for him to be able to leave like that but he was thankful for it nonetheless.

somehow he made his way to psu and found his place in the team. well, not exactly found a place. more like got adopted by a scary 5“0 tall, stabby boy, who promised to keep him safe, his twin brother and their cousin who scared the living crap out of him.

„what is our routine? do we have 16 hour days as well here? when is practice? and do we choose our majors ourselves or does the master choose them for us?“, kevin asked the others when they were alone in their dorm.

„do we have WHAT now?“, nicky asked. „dude, no we do not have 16 hour days, we, you know, want to like surive?“

„oh, are we allowed to listen to music or does the king not approve that?“, kevin asked instead.

„dude i don‘t know what fucked up shit they did in evermore but you‘re allowed to do whatever the fuck you want here. and dan would more be a queen, but we just call her dan or captain?“

„oh, okay“, kevin said before turning around and leaving the room. his chest tightened, his arm hurt, he just wanted back on the court. but he wasn‘t allowed on there until his left arm was doing alright, and as long as he wasn‘t on the court he couldn‘t train his right hand to play.

the only other thing that could calm him right now was music. the sound of a piano, the strings of a guitar against his fingers, the scratching of a pen against paper as the notes are written down on it.

kevin wandered through the fox tower, more lost than ever, and somehow found himself in a music room. a dusty piano stood under a bright window, an old guitar was in the corner next to an alomst ancient drum set.

almost automatically his feet brought him to the piano and he began playing. he played and played, as if his life depended on it and kevin felt calmer and lighter than he did in years. the voice of his mother was in his head, singing lullabies and placing a kiss on his forhead.

his right hand was playing the old lullabies he remebered while the left hand rested on his tigh

„that was good“, a voice said, bored and unimpressed. he turned around to see one of the twins watching him. it was the one who couldn‘t hide all of his emotions like the one with the knives.

„aaron, right?“, kevin asked, voice hoarse from crying.

„how do you tell us apart? not even nicky can tell us apart like 90% of the time and he‘s basically our mom“, aaron replied.

„well, it‘s a 50/50 chance, isn‘t it? i was just lucky“, kevin replied.

the music room became his place of safetey and calmness after that day. he would return whenever he felt lost or sad or upset. be it 2 am or the middle of the day.

and aaron would join him more and more often, may it to study because „your music helps me concentrate“ or just to watch kevin play while the sunbeams chased over his pretty face.

and if kevin slowly fell in love with aaron in those shared hours it was nobody‘s business

however it didn‘t look like aaron was into him anyways, as the joining kevin in the music room got less and less, and the time spent with kateyln from the vixens got more and more. and suddenly all of the songs kevin wrote were about aaron. all kevin thought about was aaron. he joined him in his dreams. the nightmares from evermore were replaced by kevin dying alone in a dark void while aaron laughed at him with katelyn by his side.

it was one of those late nights, one of the 2 am sessions where emotions took over and the truth was just easier to take. it was one of those nights that aaron decided to go into the music room, he didn‘t konw why. maybe it was katelyn telling him she wasn‘t into him anymore. it‘s not even been a month. or was it two? aaron never was good with telling weeks apart from days or hours. it was all the same blur of colors and voices and the ever so present need to be perfect. nothing less was acceptable.

„why would you ever kiss me? i‘m not even half as pretty. you gave her your sweater, it‘s just polyester, but you like her better, wish i were heather“, it was kevin‘s voice, like an angle, filled with pain and sadness. aaron sat down on the floor, just listening, wondering who the fuck heather was. and who the fuck would ever break his heart.

„watch as she stands with her holding your hand, put your arm ’round her shoulder, now i‘m getting colder. but how could i hate her, she‘s such an angle. but then again kinda wish she was dead, as she walks by, what a sight for sore eyes. brighter than a blue sky. she‘s got you mesmerized while i die. why would you ever kiss me? i‘m not even half as pretty. you gave her your sweater. it‘s just polyester, but you like her better. wish i were heather. wish i were heather. wish i were heather. why would you ever kiss me? i‘m not even half as pretty. you gave her your sweater it‘s just polyester, but you like her better. wish i were katelyn“, the last word was barely audible and aaron would have missed it if he wouldn‘t have moved closer to kevin while listening to his song.

„why would you want to be katelyn?“, he asked kevin as before he could stop himself.

as kevin turned around the moon let shadwos dance around his beautiful face. aaron could see that he was batteling with himself. that he was about to say something he wouldn‘t normally allow himself to say. show weakness and vulnerability when strenght was all he knew.

„because you like her better. because i want to be the one you kiss“, kevin whispered, looking at the ground. his hair falling into his face, hiding his expression.

aaron moved closer and closer. there were only a few inches between them now. softly he took kevin‘s chin in his hand and lifted it, forced him to meet his eyes. „well, what if you were heather?“, aaron asked, a small smile dancing around his lips.

„but- but katelyn is heather“, kevin whispered.

„well, kately found herself a girl. thea. she dumped me. and i‘m actually glad she did, i wanted you anyways. i just couldn‘t admit it. i thought it was wrong, unnatural. but if something this beautiful is sinful, i understand how adam was able to make the sin. if a fallen angle is wrong in god‘s eyes i have no answer what is right“

he closed the distance between them and placed a soft kiss on kevin‘s lips.

kevin, confused and drunk on the smell and taste of aaron, kissed him back. hungrier. needier.

the taller boy softly put his arms around the waist of the smaller one and pulled him closer. „you do not understand how long i‘ve been waiting to do this“, he whispered against aaron‘s lips.

„believe me, i do“.

the next day kevin took a guitar and a blanket after exy training, took aaron‘s hand and told him to come. together they went to the roof (where andrew and neil were making out, as usual) but they didn‘t mind they went to the other side, andrew‘s death glare on them but what‘s new, and filmed an accoustic version of heather kevin would then later on youtube. heather became their song (weird choice i know but it‘s the song where they kissed for the first time) and so so kevin‘s music career started.

kevin kept writing songs - mostly about aaron - throughout his exy career and published them. his fans loved his songs. his fans loved making conspiracy theories about who the songs are for. they‘re losing their shit when they found out it was aaron. after kevin retires he becomes a fulltime musician and eventually even goes on tour.

BONUS - CONAN GRAY SONGS OUT OF KEVIN‘S POV

grow - years, after evermore. after he starts therapy (and takes it seriously) and he feels like his life slowly but steadily becomes better. aaron and him have been dating for a year or two. he is ready to grow, to become his own person. to be himself and do whatever he wants. he is ready to go into the world. he is ready to show them that he queen of exy is not afraid anymore. that he is worthy and he knows it.

comfort crowd - aaron comforting kevin. aaron knowing when he needed to be with the foxes and when he needed some alone time. or some aaron-kevin-time. i do believe that the foxes becomes his comfort crowd, because they‘ve all been through shit and i refuse to believe that they wouldn‘t care about kevin as they did with neil once they learned what that poor boy had to bo through.

the story - kevin wrote that song about him and jean and the nest. the boy and the boy are him and jean. it‘s the story of their time there and the second verse is kevin‘s story of fleeing from evermore. and the refrain is a metaphor for life, because his life wasn‘t funny. or sweet. or pretty. and the „it could work for you and me. it‘s not the end of the story“ is about him and aaron. the last song verse is about jean and that he hopes that he finds his happy end with jeremy.

maniac - kevin wrote that one when katelyn came back to aaron and asked him to take her back cause the girl she thought she was madly in love with broke her heart. but aaron refused to take her back, told her to go back to her ratback and leave him alone. he‘s with kevin now and he doesn‘t need her anymore. she can‘t get him back.

affluenza - kevin wrote that for allison. i don‘t know the deep story behind that, the song just gives me allison vibes.

wish you were sober - kevin wrote that after the first party he went to with the foxes after he joined him and it‘s obviously about aaron. drunk aaron to be exactly. drunk aaron has a special place in kevin‘s heart.

the cut that always bleeds - that one was when aaron dated katelyn and told kevin about it and kevin just died a little bit inside whenever he did.

fight or flight - he wrote that before aaron told him how he felt about him. he just didn‘t know how to put his feelings into words so he just wrote that song.

lookalike - kevin wrote that before aaron and him started dating, but when jean and jeremy started to become closer. he didn‘t take that well at that time as he had a massive crush on both jean (who refused to talk to him) and jeremy (who never looked at him twice but still). and he just daydreamed about dating jeremy so much it almost felt like a betrayal when he started dating jean.

the king - honestly? aaron dating katelyn but nonetheless always coming back to kevin. kevin knows that. that‘s why he wrote the song.

(can we be friends?) - this is about jean/ jeremy when kevin didn‘t really have friends. jean/ jeremy at the time of the nest probably.

(online love) - this one‘s about jeremy. cause let‘s be honest, at least one of those songs is about jeremy.

crush culture - that one is the result of an angry 4 am song writing session when aaron dated katelyn and jj was just starting to date.

generation why - this one‘s for the millenials. his generation in this au.

heather - heather is aaron, basically he‘s talking about having a massive crush on aaron but aaron would never feel the same cuz he‘s obviously straight and madly in love with katelyn (= heather) who is just stunning and gorgeous and beautiful and so much better than kevin

overdrive - this one was written after the first time the twins and nicky took him to eden‘s. the time when kevin started to catch feelings for aaron.

[mitskihost]

Kevin Day and his Punk Girlfriend

(now has a pt 2)

we all talk about bi!kevin with a cute boyfriend BUT consider kevin w a punk gf and he just loves her Alot. yes this is inspired by bluesey no i will not be taking questions

- the first time he sees her, it's at eden. she's wearing a leather skirt and a band shirt, and she's sitting alone by the bar until some jackass comes to disturb her. kevin watches from a distance as she pours her drink down his pants after several minutes of conversation and she only flips him off as he walks away angrily. he doesn't go up to her, partly because he fears she'll spill a drink on him too, and partly because he can't find the courage too (he knows he's free now, but it's still takes times to adjust)

- he thinks it'll be easy not to think about the girl, between games and classes and his wild team, he's barely got time to think about himself. he only thinks about her once though, when jean says that he's dating jeremy and he's proud of himself; he thinks of her fierce eyes and imagines what they would look like staring at him. and then he tries to never think about her again.

- except she turns up everywhere. she's sitting on the campus lawns with her guitar and a notepad (kevin sees a tattoo along her calf and finds himself thinking about it for days). she's cheering her vixen friends on during one of the games (kevin thinks he imagines her looking his way at one point). he runs into her in the library one monday morning, reading the only copy of a book he was searching for (nicky would've screamed at him for not taking the opportunity, but what nicky doesn't know, doesn't harm him)

- the first time she sees him, it's at a diner the foxes chose to eat at one night. she's two booths down, he thinks she didn't notice him. but she did, she recognized the queen tattoo and the straight nose and the shy mouth. she only waved at him before he left.

- the first time they spoke, it was at an after game party. he's only there because dan demands it and she's only there because she's allowed to chose the music. it takes four drinks and some breathing exercises before kevin gathers the strength to talk to her. it goes terribly. but she laughs, and then clutches his elbow as she laughs louder at his next comment. the night starts with them talking about the game and ends with her number scribbled on a paper that he shoves in his wallet.

- it takes more time for kevin to actually open up to her. they meet often, she drags him to art events across campus and in return he drags her to exy games. she sneaks him into her dorm room and teaches him how to strum her guitar, he gets her into irish folklore.

- he doesn't invite her on a date. a lingering fear from his past reminds him that girls are a distraction. but he can't think of anything that's still holding him back. neil survived, and he has andrew. jean survived, and now he has jeremy. kevin won't admit it, but it feels bitter and almost like defeat when he sees them move on.

- opportunity presents itself when kevin least expects it. spring banquet is around the corner, the foxes all have dates and nicky finally intervenes and forces kevin to ask her out.

- she wears a grey croptop and a blazer with long pants, ears and fingers lined with silver jewelry. andrew has to knock kevin's mouth shut with a finger.

- she's funnier than he remembers. a dead pan humor with a side of that fox like sarcasm makes her excellent company. kevin keeps her by his side throughout the night, and only lets her go when he talks to jean.

- dan and matt love her immediately, nicky follows suit when he realizes she can shut kevin up without trying, allison and neil are just surprised someone like her is willing to try with someone like kevin (it's all a joke, they reassure when kevin frowns). andrew and aaron don't talk to her, but kevin hopes they aren't far behind.

- they first time they touch, it's her kissing his queen tattoo the day after the banquet when they drop her off. andrew knocks his mouth shut again, but saves him from misery and doesn't make a comment about it.

- the kisses get more frequent- she kisses him next on the side of his mouth the next time they step out. he kisses her forehead after a tough yet victorious match. she kisses his shoulder after he fires at someone for making a very misogynistic remark about dan at an after game party. he kissed her nose when she's too exhausted to reach his face. she kisses him after their first actual date, and he kisses her back until they're both kind of breathless.

- kevin still has a hard time accepting that she's interested in being more, and that isn't just a stress-induced attraction that he was so used to. she was patient, never demanded more or less. he has once asked her how long she would wait, she only smiled and told him that there was no waiting. "i'm happy with whatever i get of you"

- they become official months later. the team is delighted to say the least, not only because they absolutely adored her but also because she was the only one who could pull the stick out of kevin's ass.

- she tells andrew that she thinks his all-black outfits are "killer", and andrew learns to tolerate her. aaron comes around only because she knows katelyn too.

- dates!! kevin on dates!! them, driving around aimlessly after midnight practice and she introduces him to queen (she's shocked when she learns he doesn't already listen to their music). (kevin's favorite song is don't stop me now, but he says killer queen just to see her smile) them, making breakfast together at her dorm after a particularly hard hitting week. them, falling asleep on the floor, her sprawled on his chest and him with an arm around her waist to keep her there.

- they go out for dinner with wymack one night (he sees him staring at her when she isn't looking and he sees her hooking a hand by his elbow when he's thinking far away and realizes that she makes his son happy, so she's worth keeping around)

- they go to eden together for the first time, she kisses him silly at the end of the night and it's all he can think about for weeks. he returns the favor weeks later, and she takes whatever piece of himself he can willingly gives to her, until he can give her everything entirely.

- he's happy with her, and it satisfies andrew to see him like that, though he'd never admit it.

- lemme have this PLS i just wanna see him with a loud, happy girl by his side who makes him smile and realize that he has a chance to grow again, to be loved again. :') i can dream

[percontaion-points]

King’s Men chapter 4

Click to see the rest of the snark & image descriptions.

Chapter 4

"If we knew what Andrew had against us, we could try to fight it," Dan said.

JFC, I don't think that three books is enough to cover all of Andrew's psychological issues in the depth that Dan is asking about.

And I say this as a casual psychology hobbyist.

"Feels like we're right back where we started in August," Matt agreed.

"If we knew what Andrew had against us, we could try to fight it," Dan said.

[…]

"I can try. But," he continued, with a glance between them, "someone needs to work on Aaron. Nicky wants to be your friend and Kevin knows the team is stronger as a whole, but Aaron's almost as dead-set against us as Andrew is.”

It's like the second book literally never happened. What was the goddamned point of it even if the second everybody comes back following the winter break, and everybody hit the “character reset” button?

That was one of the things reporters had liked harping about most when Kevin became a permanent fixture at Andrew's side: Kevin was raised at Evermore, surrounded by the best and practically born with a racquet in his hand, whereas Andrew learned Exy while he was locked up in juvie. Neil had a page-long article about it in his notebook. It was crassly titled "The Prince and the Pauper", and its focus was on how doomed their friendship was. The writer thought their attitudes toward Exy too incompatible and their backgrounds too different for them to stay together long.

Imagine getting the assignment of writing about the bromance between two college sports players.

Like looking down at what you'd just finished writing and going “Haha, I got a journalism degree.”

"I'm not a striker by choice, either," he said. "I was a backliner in little leagues. Riko remembers because I scrimmaged with him and Kevin.”

I think the weirdest thing about Neil's personality is just that... it was already established that he played literally one game of exy when he was little, on orders of the mob boss to see if he couldn't turn Neil into an exy puppet, like Kevin and Riko. And then his mom took him and they went on the run.

Like literally one game. But Neil decided to turn this singular game into a goddamned personality trait.

"Exy is the shiny object of your sad little world. You know you're being hunted and you know the hounds are closing in, but you won't let go to save yourself. You once told me you don't understand why a person would actively try to die, but here you are. I guess that was another lie."

I think that the worst goddamned part of this stupid series is how AWARE that it is.

Yet, it makes lines like this constant, about how sports isn't a personality, etc etc... BUT IT DOES NOTHING TO ACTUALLY FIX THE PROBLEMS THAT IT'S HIGHLIGHTING.

At the end of the day, the only thing that this line will be will be a throw-away line. Not a moment for self-reflection, not a reason to want to change, not a warning to the reader not to turn a hobby into your sole personality.

Nope. Just a dumb moment of being too self-aware yet not aware enough to do anything about the problem being highlighted.

“Aaron cut a deal with Andrew at juvie: if Andrew stuck with him until graduation, Aaron would stick with Andrew. No friends, no girlfriends, nothing. Aaron couldn't even socialize with his teammates."

Part of me gets it.

But most of me is just sitting there being “wow. Do you see how shitty and abusive that this is? If he was a boyfriend, we'd all be screaming for the one to get away from such a toxic situation. Why the hell is this somehow different?”

"You were right. They made a promise. Aaron and Andrew, I mean. That's what Aaron told Katelyn, anyway. Aaron cut a deal with Andrew at juvie: if Andrew stuck with him until graduation, Aaron would stick with Andrew. No friends, no girlfriends, nothing. Aaron couldn't even socialize with his teammates."

Neil combed his fingers through his hair and tested the bandage on his cheek. "Aaron would have meant high school graduation. They renewed it when they signed a contract to play here."

"Now Katelyn's in the picture, but Aaron won't fight for her."

Okay... So is Aaron just going to continue to put his life on hold for Andrew's mental illness forever? Literally none of this is remotely healthy.

"This is a joke," Dan said, grabbing Neil's chin. "Neil?"

"He told me to transfer to the Ravens," Neil said. "He said I could finish this year with the Foxes but that I'd move to Edgar Allan this fall. They inked me in preparation and I couldn't stop them. I wanted you to know in case Riko says something about it. I'm still a Fox no matter what he says. I wouldn't sign his papers."

WHY THE FUCK DID THEY NOT KNOW ABOUT THIS. THEY LITERALLY PUT MAKE-UP ON HIM EVERY DAY TO COVER HIS BRUISES.

"You never had any plans to go home for Christmas, did you? That whole mess about your uncle flying to Arizona—you made that up so we wouldn't ask too many questions or wonder why you weren't going to New York with Kevin."

Nothing quite like being a day late and a dollar short.

"Nightmares," Neil echoed. It wasn't the turn he'd thought this conversation would take but he could guess what was tearing Aaron apart. "About November, you mean."

"He doesn't want it to bother him," Katelyn said.

My usual sentiment of “THERAPY?! LOL WHAT'S THAT?!” is way too on the nose with this. Please refer back to the previous chapter commentary for my full opinion on this matter.

He got up and left, and she didn't call after him.

Chapter 4 summary: Some time passes, and Neil is given the approval to continue playing again. After practice, he talks with some of the others over how the team had been together towards the end of the fall semester, but now it's like that never happened.

Back at the dorm, Neil randomly thinks about how Andrew hates exy so much. He thinks about some of Andrew's background, of how he'd been introduced to exy while he was in juvie. Kind of the opposite of Kevin, in Neil's opinion. Andrew and Neil then have a long-ish conversation about what exy means to them, but again, the two of them are kind of polar opposites about the entire thing. Andrew keeps telling Neil not to make the game his singular personality trait, but Neil... doesn't listen. What else is new. Immediately following this, Neil leaves to return to his usual nighly practices with Kevin. Who promptly reminds both Neil as well as the reader that Kevin has exactly one personality trait, and it's exy. (Granted, there is a history of Kevin's abuse, but the book literally never goes into that. Oh no, the only one we gotta talk about is Andrew.)

The next morning, Matt tells Neil that the twins made an agreement when they were in high school to stick together. However, when they signed at the university, they basically renewed their promise. And the short of it is that Andrew is holding Aaron emotionally hostage, as well as the idea of Aaron's future (ie a wife and kids). They're positive that if Andrew found out about Aaron's secret relationship with Katelyn, Andrew would hurt her. Neil decides to play dirty and get them into the same room together to talk it out with Betsy, and Katelyn would be the leverage against Aaron.

Later, the girls randomly find out about Neil's tattoo, despite them being up close and personal with his face because of make-up. They then piece together what Neil actually did over his break, which... again... a day late and a dollar short.

Neil later meets up with Katelyn in the library to rope her in on getting Aaron the help he needs, and to get him out from under the manipulative thumb of his brother. He convinces her to stop being the victim caught in between the Aaron/Andrew situation, but she doesn't exactly give an actual answer right away.

[stories-for-sell]

   Her scream echoed through the forest, full of pain and despair. Maybe that’s why Vylad was drawn to it, because of the pain it held. He fed off the pain, a sick smile forming on his face as the demon within him feasted and corrupted him.

   His eyes turned red as he calmly walked towards the area, noticing the giant crater in the ground, and a small pile of rubble rolled down into it, covering up something. Red eyes travelled along the edge, just off to the left, where Lord Aphmau stood. And next to her.. Was that… no it can’t be.

   “G-Garroth?” He croaked out, voice strained and started to shake, not used to really ever talking to someone. Much less asking for their attention like this.

   His head turned, blue meeting red, slowly fading to green as the two men looked at each other. Garroth covered his mouth, looking between Aphmau and the Shadow Knight. And finally, he spoke, his voice ready to soothe Vylad before the beast gnawing on his insides erupted, eyes travelling to stare at the bottom of the crater, where a pale hand laid motionless, blue eye forever staring straight ahead.

   “Baby Brother..”

   Vylad let his own eyes examine the contents at the bottom of the crater more thoroughly, taking a step back as he made out the two bodies at the bottom. One in a priest outfit.. And one in a black jacket. Vylad’s gaze turned to Aphmau as he looked at the bandana in her hand, then at the shock and pain in her eyes.

   “No.. NO!” He screamed, turning to run down the crater, just to have two sets of hands pull him back. He was held against someone’s chest, feeling soft murmur’s in his ear as he screamed and kicked, desperate to be free, to be let go. To go to them.

   Laurance held on tightly, looking at his friend and his lover, feeling sympathy for them. Garroth helped him hold Vylad back, hearts breaking as the sight of the young boy so desperate to to try and show they were alive. Teeth sank into the brunette’s hand, and he let go with a yelp, pulling his bleeding hand back as Vylad tore from their weakened grip.

   “Vylad, stop!” He yelled, as the green blur tripped in their rush, and went tumbling down the crater, hitting its head hard on the rubble.

   He wouldn’t stop, getting on his hands and knees and crawling the remaining distance, grabbing onto the shoulders that were once weighed down by many burdens, shaking a body littered with scars of former struggles.

    Vylad didn’t know when they finally pried him away, or brought him back to the village. Or when they gave him a cup of tea that had long since turned cold. He was numb, to everything. Laurance and Garroth tried to speak, but when they did, they received the same, dead green eyes, staring past them as the boy retreated into his own head.

   Many suns have risen and set since that day that the beast in him was silenced by the death of two he held dear, and it was tired of slumber. Vylad aimlessly walked around the village, trying to distract himself once more from the image of Zane and Aaron lying dead at the bottom of the crater, which has been cleared out and filled with water to create a pond, with lilies growing around the edges. Jarring him from his thoughts, he felt a gentle hand grab his shoulder and squeeze. He turned his head, meeting his elder brother’s gaze and the sympathy that shone in those eyes that forever watched him fall deeper and deeper in his depressive state.

   “Little brother.. are you ok?” He asked gently, giving him a soft smile. But behind that smile, Vylad could see the truth. Garroth didn’t really care about him, all he cared about was keeping up the facade of their story. The lies of brotherhood.

   The scowl on his face said it all as he shoved Garroth away, eyes flashing red for a second and voice turning demonic. “Don’t touch me!” 

   ‘Kill, kill. Kill the thing, feast on the misery you will cause, destroy them all.’ The Beast whispered in his ear, wrapping around him as his vision blackens and senses disappear.

   He comes to when he’s being shaken by someone, people are screaming around him, a tingle in his fingertips as touch slowly returns.. right as he slashed his hand across a face, feeling blood on his fingers and soaking through his clothes. Then the noise… it was so loud, it hurt. He covered his ears, whining softly as it became unbearable, waiting for it to level out. The rest of his senses returned, each one more overwhelming than the last.

    

   Vylad had attacked Garroth, nearly killing him in a fit of rage that had come up from within, seen by everyone, driven by the pain he felt from the loss they all went through. It hurt more knowing Aaron had left an unborn child to be raised fatherless. He hated it, hated all the looks of pity that were shot his way when he walked down the streets. To disappear, was all that he wanted to do. Run away and never return, get far away from everyone, from the terrified stares he received, the pulling back as he slowly stood up and walked forwards on shaky legs, soon breaking into a sprint, ignoring the calls of Lord Aphmau and Laurance, Ignoring the sound of KAtelyn and Travis chasing after him, Dmitri hot on their heels. 

   He ran until he couldn’t any longer, and yet ran some more. Through a portal, out a gate, into the woods, past someone who radiated Shadow Knight energy. He ran from it all. Vylad needed to get away, somewhere he wouldn’t hurt anyone ever again, where he could shed his fake identity and finally be free. Somewhere where he wasn’t judged for what he was. Somewhere… like the Nether.

   His legs couldn’t handle much more, and he felt his left one finally give out, sending him crashing to the forest floor, rolling down a hill, clothes getting caught and torn, scarf sticking to a tree and nearly choking him. Finally, his body came to a stop, blood dripping from a gash on his forehead. Light shone down on the damaged fifteen year old body of Vladmir Sebastian, hurting his eyes even when he could no longer see, hear, feel, taste, smell. His undead heart slows to a stop as he breathed a last breathe, scared and alone, miles from home.

   And then the sun was gone, but the heat was still there, the hard ground under him turned into a soft bed, the cuts on him slowly healing, creating scars of reminders of his life now gone.

   “Maybe now I can join Aaron and Zane…” Vlad thought to himself, gently opening his eyes, confused as he found himself in a room of red, sitting up against the headrest, staring around, recognizing his surroundings as his room in the Nether base. The sound of a door opening brought him out of his thoughts, head turning to stare at the two figures that entered the room, eyes widening as he met with two familiar faces.

   “Hello, ‘Little Brother.’”

[kar3npage]

The 5 times one of the Foxes saw Andrew smile, and the one time all of them saw him smile

Because I love the 5+1 format, and because I just want Andrew and Neil to be happy. (Also I’ve decided that of course they would get married, because that just makes sense).

My apologies for any mistakes, this was written all in one go this afternoon and I was too excited to wait before posting. I’m also trying to sign up for ao3 so I can post it there, I’ll update when that happens:) 

Thanks for reading!

1.

The mood in the room was unusually somber before the Palmetto Foxes third game of the season. This was especially unusual because they weren’t expecting any sort of backlash, and the team that they were playing against was pretty tame. No one had any particular fear against the Terrapins and the two teams were mostly friendly.

Allison knew that the dark vibe was from the silence that came from the corner that Neil and Andrew sat in. 

Besides the cat fights with the new Foxes, everyone on the team has been working well together this year. The upperclassmen and Andrews group had an unbreakable bond from the events of last year, although they all pretended that they couldn’t care less about the other group (except for Matt. He couldn’t pretend to not care if his life depended on it, the sweet puppy).

Neil’s silence was accompanied by a far away gaze and sickly pale skin. Allison had already pulled him aside in the dorms to lecture him about playing while sick, but he insisted that he was fine. Allison had let him go, assuming that Andrew would take care of him. Now she was wondering if she should have pushed harder, since he looked absolutely determined to play today.

Renee’s soft nudge distracted Allison from their almost dead looking striker and she gave her an understanding look.

“I’m sure he’ll take care of himself,” Renee says quietly. Allison squeezes her hand, grateful to have her to lean against. She still wasn’t sure how Renee managed to understand exactly what everyone was thinking with such accuracy. 

“Okay people, we’ve gotten a strong start, let’s keep that up,” Wymack says gruffly, sending a concerned look toward Neil. “If any of you aren’t feeling up to it, tell me now so we can change the starting line-up.”

Everyone looks at Neil, who stares straight ahead like he hadn’t heard Coach. He turns his head to avoid Andrews dark look, then gets up stiffly.

“We done Coach? Dan and I would like to start drills soon,” Neil says. Allison snorts at his poor attempt at changing the subject, but Wymack just lets him go with a nod. 

As they make their way over to the court Allison sees Wymach snag Andrew. “You’ll keep an eye on him?” she hears him say. She doesn’t hear Andrew answer, but she knows that he will.

They’re up, 4-2, by the time the first half is done. Allison had kept her eye on Neil every time she was off, but he had looked fine while playing. Abby wasn’t able to check in with him during half-time though, too busy dealing with Jack’s minor injury that he had gotten from getting checked into the plexiglass. Allison had to admit that she had very little sympathy for the kid.

Everything was going fine until almost the end of the next half. Allison hadn’t been paying much attention to the health of her team while she was playing, focused more on actually playing, but no one could ignore the loud slam that came from near the other teams goal.

Allison instinctively looked toward the noise to find out who was down.

The game was still going, but slumped against the wall across from her was Neil. Allison didn’t hesitate to run over to him, abandoning the goal for Andrew to look after.

One of the Terrapins backliners stood beside him, helmet off and looking sweetly concerned. He starts babbling as soon as Allison makes it over to them.

“I swear, it wasn’t that hard of a hit,” he says frantically. Allison understood the panic-it had less to do with Neil and more to do with what might happen to the poor kid when Andrew got here.

Allison ignores him and tugs Neils helmet off to reveal his deathly pale face. His eyes start fluttering as he wakes up, and he’s able to put his hand up to stop the game. Allison hears a smack behind her, but she ignores it.

“Neil, where are you hurt?” she says. It comes out irritated, but she knows that Neil will get that it’s out of concern.

“‘M fine,” he mumbles, trying and failing to get up. Allison shoves him down and looks around for Abby.

The poor kid who hit Neil is being held against the plexiglass by a furious Andrew, Nicky and Aaron standing beside him and trying to talk him out of any blatant violence. Abby has fighting her way through the players with a mixture of anger and worry.

“Drew?” Neil says, eyes closed and head leaning against the wall. There’s another smack and a few seconds later Andrew shoves Allison out of the way to sit beside him. Abby shows up a few minutes later, but Allison stays where she is to use her body to give them a bit of a barrier.

“You idiot,” Andrew growls. “Next time, get up after you get hit.”

Neil gives him a feverish smile. “I’m sorry I worried you. I’m f-, I’m okay.” He just barely catches himself and Andrew shakes his head in irritation. Allison grins, a little relieved that he’s feeling good enough to catch his words. 

“Neil, do you know how high your fever is right now? You could kill yourself, playing like this. What were you thinking?” Abby lectures while she smooths back his hair. “Why didn’t you tell him to stop, Andrew?”

Neil grabs Andrews hand awkwardly, still wearing his armoured gloves. Andrew snorts. “You think I’m his keeper? He does what he wants. Junkie.”

Neil laughs weakly at that and lets Abby and Andrew support his weight as they get him up. Once he’s able to stand on his own two feet, the crowd lets out a supportive roar and Allison turns around to see Neil and Andrew. Andrew gives him a small, relieved smile, something that Allison never thought that she would see. No one had seen Andrew smile a single time since he’s been off of his meds. This smile is completely different. It softens his jaw, and even though it’s so small that it’s barely noticeable, Neil beams when he catches it.

She hears Andrew mutter a number under his breathe and they slowly walk off the court.

Allison could settle a few bets from this, but a part of her knows that she saw a private moment. Renee walks over to take over the goal and gives her a pleased smile, almost like she knew how selfless Allison was being by not telling anyone about this.

She grins back and relaxes, knowing that Neil is in good hands.

2.

Matt could cry, he was so happy to see his best friend after so many months apart. Dan squeezes his arm and lets him go give Neil a bear hug. All of them have graduated now, and Christmas is one of the only times that the original Foxes get to see each other, and even then it’s sometimes difficult to get everyone together. 

This year everyone is gathered at Abby’s, and it feels just like old times. Aaron and Katelyn are already helping Abby and Wymack in the kitchen and Nicky is regaling everyone with stories from Germany, Erik adding details every once in a while but mostly just looking at his fiance with heart eyes.

Allison and Renee are coming later, and Kevin is watching an Exy match on TV. His mouth is open slightly as he watches the rematch like he’s never seen it before. Andrew sits beside him with a bored expression while he scrolls through his phone, but Matt notices him glance up at them a few times while he chats with Neil.

Neil had mentioned how difficult it’s been to be playing on different teams than Andrew, and Matt can see how happy he is now that everyone’s together. He thinks that Neil’s been getting lonely.

The kitchen is a hive of activity and they all talk over each other as they catch up on the past year. Dan and Matt show everyone their engagement rings, way too excited to wait to tell everyone like they had planned. Matt swears that Wymack tears up a bit when Dan asks him to walk her down the aisle, and Abby just about breaks his back with how tightly she hugs him.

Andrew even offers them a nod and agrees to fly out with Neil for the wedding, even though they aren’t sure when it will be yet.

There’s more exclaiming when Allison and Renee get there and Allison shouts at them for not waiting to announce it until they got there. They look tired but happy after travelling all day, and Renee gives him one of her pleased, proud smiles. At some point Betsy had gotten there as well, and Matt sees her having a long conversation with Andrew in the living room.

Matt can’t believe how far they’ve all come. After such ruined childhoods and terrible experiences in University, they all managed to build themselves lives. Build themselves a family.

Matt feels so incredibly fond of them all that it feels like his chest is going to split, like it can’t hold all of the affection for these people.

Dinner is as hectic and happy as the rest of the day was, and they sit at the dining table for hours talking. Kevin and Neil have an in-depth conversation about their teams and their performance so far this season, which Andrew mocks and then turns to talk with Renee. 

Matt and Dan are talking over each other with the ease of people who are perfectly comfortable with each other as they tell Abby about their honeymoon plans, and Allison gives them tips. Or maybe they’re more like orders, but it’s all good ideas so they don’t mind.

It isn’t until after they’ve cleaned up the dishes and most of the Foxes have settled in the living room to rewatch some of their old matches that Matt gets the chance to talk with Neil on his own.

They skype as regularly as possible, and Neil calls him almost every week to get updates, but Matt has still missed him. 

When he notices Neil sneak out to the porch, he follows behind. 

“It’s hard to believe, but Kevin’s obsession hasn’t waned in the slightest,” Matt jokes as he plops down on the stairs beside Neil. The striker throws his head back to laugh and Matt revels in the warmth that comes with being able to make this once shy kid laugh his genuine, thrilled laugh.

“Andrew would say the same about me,” he says, eyes crinkling in amusement.

“He’s right. You’ve been playing well though, that goal in the last game where you hit it from half court was insane! I have the video saved to my phone so I can show people and tell them I know you,” Matt gushes, glad to finally be able to tell him how proud he is of him. Neil has a pleased blush on his cheeks.

“You still watch my games?”

“Of course I do! Dan and I’ve turned it into date night. We order pizza.”

Neils laughs again, more pleased than he would admit that Dan watches them too.

“How have you been Neil? For real?”

Neil fidgets with the bottom of his shirt. “It’s tough,” he finally admits. “Without Andrew. Our schedules are so different. There’s a chance that next year I might be able to switch though.”

Matt hums and bumps his shoulder against Neils. “I’m glad. I don’t want you to be lonely.”

Neil listens to Matt talk about Dan and what they’ve been up to for a while, and they sit in comfortable silence until Matt finally laughs. Neil gives him a questioning look.

“I have a ridiculous question for you that’s been plaguing me for years now.” Neil raises an eyebrow and waits for Matt to keep talking.

“So if you think that Andrews attractive, does that mean you think that about Aaron too?” Matts eyes are filled with mirth. He knows all too well the strained relationship that Neil and Aaron had through University, and also that they have just reached the point where they can talk about things other than Exy without killing each other.

Neil snorts, but then thinks through an answer much more seriously than Matt expected. “I’m not really attracted to people,” he says, then shakes his head and backtracks. “That’s not what I meant. Obviously I’m attracted to Andrew, and I think he’s beautiful, but it’s more because I know him so well and I trust him so much.”

Neil is blushing slightly at the admission and he looks to Matt to see if he understands what he means. 

“It’s hard to explain. I never was attracted to anyone before Andrew. I can see objectively that some people are nice looking, but it doesn’t really affect me. But I really care about Andrew, and I can talk to him for hours and I know what foods he likes and he knows what I like. And the longer we know each other and the more I know him, the more beautiful he gets. Does that make sense?”

Neil frowns and waits for Matt. Matt can’t help the soft smile that curves his lips. “Neil Josten, you are the sweetest person on this goddamned team, you know that? Yeah, that makes sense.”

Matt hears the door close behind them and turns around to see Andrew standing there with his usual blank expression, but his red ears indicate that he heard what Neil said. Neil beams up at him and Matt gets up to leave. He turns around to look at the two before he goes inside and is shocked to see the softest smile gracing Andrews lips before his sits down beside Neil. 

It’s no secret that most of the Foxes were worried about Neil choosing Andrew, of all people, to trust. But the longer they’re together, the more Matt realizes that Andrew is just as soft for Neil as Neil is for Andrew, he’s just better at hiding it.

Matt’s still grinning about that soft look hours later when him and Dan are getting ready to leave. 

“You two are good for each other,” he says quietly to Neil before they leave, and Neil rewards him with a thrilled smile and a nod.

3.

Playing professionally makes a lot of things very difficult to hide. Something about the sport has made it a fan favourite, and the interesting lives of the players mean that the general public is completely fascinated with hearing about their lives outside of the sport.

As much as Kevin hates how intrusive everyone can be because of this, he has to admit that it makes it much easier for him to keep his eye on the old Foxes. Articles about Neil and Andrew are ridiculously easy to find online, and Kevin has made a habit of checking on them regularly.

He’s doing just that when he finds an article about Andrew getting noticed after his flight to New York. The journalist muses about why on earth he would be going to New York, a place that holds none of his family, only his long time rival, Striker Neil Josten. 

What makes his trip even more interesting is the fact that the same long term rival picked him up from the airport.

What made Kevin look at this article with such interest was the picture that was attached to it. It’s obviously been taken with a good camera, since the photo is crisp and clear. In the center stands Neil and Andrew, standing only an inch apart. The crowd behind them is blurred out, making the photo look like a scene from a rom-com. Neil is beaming at Andrew and tugging his bag from him, eyes sparkling. What caught Kevins attention is the small quirk in Andrews lips, something that would be too small to call a smile on anyone but Andrew.

Kevin still has a protective streak for the two boys and wants them to have as easy of a life as possible, but he can’t deny the fact that they seem happier than they ever have been.

Kevin can’t remember the last time that he saw Andrew have a real smile that wasn’t violent or caused by medication.

He re-reads the article, then looks back up at the picture. Is this journalist stupid? He thinks. The whole article is about how Andrew must have come for something else, how their thrilled expressions must have been because they were mid-roast. Kevin can’t believe the journalist didn’t immediately realize that they were dating. He sighs and moves on to the next article, this one about Jeremy, but his mind keeps going back to the content smile on Andrews face. They’re going to be outed if they don’t stop making each other look so happy, he thinks. But he also thinks that maybe that’s not as bad of a thing as he’s made it out to be.

A few minutes later he goes back to the article and sends the link to Nicky without any explanation. He thought that might make Nicky happy.

4.

“I’m glad we still have the skype dates. I know Andrew and Neil are so busy right now,” Erik says, playing absentmindedly with Nicky’s hair as they wait for the boys to answer their skype call.

They’ve been having these weekly conversations with first Neil and Andrew, and later Aaron and Katelyn as well, for months. They had originally just called each other, but Nicky missed seeing his cousins more than he could say. He loves Germany, and he loves every single moment with Erik, but it’s still tough to have such a long distance relationship with his family. Especially after everything they’ve all gone through together.

It was harder to keep in contact with the other Foxes, but they all did their best to meet up for Christmas (everyone even came to Germany a few years ago. Nicky cried with joy, even though Andrew insisted it was just because everyone wanted to see Europe), plus he often got texts from Matt and Renee. And every once in a while he gets an Exy article from Kevin.

Nicky hummed in agreement and watched the screen with anticipation. They had missed last weeks skype call because Neil and Andrew were finally moving in together after signing for the same team in the fall. Nicky has been vibrating with excitement to see the apartment, and Erik has been waiting to ask for tips about taking care of a cat from Neil.

When the screen finally pops up, it’s obvious that Neil and Andrew haven’t noticed it yet. Neil is laughing about something, one of his rare laughs that is unforced and filled with true joy. And Andrew, Nicky’s beloved, terrifying cousin is beaming. It’s the biggest smile he’s seen on his cousins face for years, and it’s the first time he’s ever seen him smile with such true happiness. Nicky could cry, and when he turns to look at Erik, he can see that his eyes are shining as well.

Erik clears his throat and Andrew schools his expression as he turns to the screen. Neil is still looking at Andrew with pure love, but he waves to the screen.

A flash of silver derails Nicky’s thoughts even further.

“Neil. Neil, what is on your hand?” He asks, delight evident in his voice. Neil smirks and holds up the other hand, which has nothing on it. Andrews lips quirk.

“No, your other hand. Is that a ring?!” Nicky is almost bouncing, waiting for Neil to stop teasing him and show him the simple silver band that sits, unassuming, on his finger. 

Neil shows him his other hand without hesitating, and Nicky realizes that they’ve already talked about telling him. It makes his heart grow bigger than it already is.

“Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh, are you guys engaged? When did that happen?” Nicky practically shrieks while Erik gives them a heartfelt congratulations.

Andrew’s expression is as bored as ever, but Nicky doesn’t miss the fact that they’re holding hands under the laptop. 

“A few days ago,” Andrew says nonchalantly. The tips of his ears are pink though, and Neil can’t hold in the grin.

“Hows Germany?” Neil asks politely, and Erik laughs.

“There’s no way Nicky will let you change the subject that quickly,” Erik says, and Nicky nods effusively. 

“How did this happen? I need the entire story Andrew! Or Neil, whoever will actually give me the details. Who asked who? Did you cry?”

Neil laughs again. “We asked each other. We had a long conversation about it.”

Nicky wishes that he could tease them for that and call them boring, but he knows what a huge deal this is for his cousin. He’s thrilled that Neil understands that as well. 

“You guys are so good for each other,” Nicky says, sniffling a bit. Andrew rolls his eyes.

“I’m hanging up now,” he says.

“No! I need to hear what you’re doing for your wedding! Maybe I can help you plan it. And Allison can too! It’s gonna be so amazing.”

Neil laughs as Andrew reaches his hand out in slow motion to close the computer. Neil’s voice reaches them as the camera goes down.

“We’re going to have a party, we’ll figure out a time you guys can come out, okay?”

Erik confirms that because Nicky is too emotional over the fact that they’re planning the time around him. 

He leans his head against Erik’s shoulder and Erik smiles. 

“I guess we’ll have to wait until next week for an apartment tour,” he says, and Nicky can hear the smile in his words.

“I never thought that he would be happy. Isn’t that sad? I wasn’t even sure if Andrew would be talking to me for this long. Then this scrappy puppy comes along and puts us all in danger and makes us all love him, and here we are. No one ever would have guessed this in a million years.” Nicky says thoughtfully.

That night, Nicky falls asleep with the picture of a truly happy Andrew in his mind. 

5.

As much as he tries to convince his old Foxes that he’s a grouchy old man who doesn’t care, Wymack spends a lot of time checking up on his kids. 

He’s been to as many of Kevin’s games as he can possible fit in whenever they’re close enough and he doesn’t have a game on, he video calls Nicky as often as he can (keeping weird hours makes this easier, and Nicky and Abby both lecture him regularly about getting enough sleep), and Dan and Matt live close enough that they have dinner together regularly. Renee and Allison move around too often to make it easy to see them, but everyone ends up together at least once a year. They avoid doing it on Thanksgiving (Andrew and Neil prefer to keep that one quiet, and no one argues with that). Aaron and Katelyn have even come out to see them a few times when their schedules weren’t as hectic with the hospital.

The hardest ones to get to see are Andrew and Neil. They spent a few years doing long distance with both playing on different teams, so every time they had time off they spent it together. Wymack wishes that he could have lived closer to Neil, he knows that those years were particularly difficult on him.

Now that they are living together and on the same team, it’s been easier for them to get in contact with everyone, but they’re still moving around too often for it to be easy to visit. 

Last year they detoured to stay with Abby and Wymack for a few days during their annual summer road trip, and having Bee there meant that Andrew has come out a few extra times to stay when Neil was busy with press.

Wymack tries very hard to convince them that he couldn’t care less about how often they come out to visit him, but they all know that he misses them terribly.

To keep a closer eye on them, Wymack and Abby recorded all of their games, and Wymack secretly watches youtube videos with names like ‘Neil Josten’s Best 10 Roasts’ and ‘10 Minutes of the Josten Minyard Rivalry’. He does not miss dealing with the press after Neil’s been let loose, but he feels a bit of pride every time he rips into a deserving journalist after being asked about his scars. If Wymack could kick everyone’s ass who hurt his kids, he would. Since he can’t, watching them get demolished by a tiny redhead has to do.

For the first time in a few weeks, Abby and Wymack are finally watching a game live. It’s always a lot more stressful watching them live, but they make up for that by ordering Chinese and making an evening of it.

They barely talk through the game other than to insult the other team or praise a good save or goal. The second half as just started when an aggressive striker doesn’t stop at the goal lines. The entire court goes silent and Wymack watches with barely controlled terror as Neil sprints across the court just in time for Andrew to hit the wall. Neil shoves the striker away with more venom than Wymack has seen from him since Riko and turns his attention to the goalie currently lying on the ground.

“Come on Andrew, get up,” Wymack whispers as he watches Neil fling his helmet off and protect his prone form while the medical staff make their way over. The sports announcers are frantic as they explain what just happened and Abby groans in irritation as they show a slow motion recap of Andrew getting hit, then of Neil protecting him.

Wymack clutches his phone and enters the number of their coach before he’s even thought it through. He knows it isn’t likely that he’ll answer, but he’s disappointed when it goes to voicemail anyway. Beside him Abby is calling Neil.

It takes almost 30 long minutes before Abby gets through to Neil, and she immediately puts it on speaker phone so that they can both speak to him.

“Neil, is everything okay?” Abby says, concern leaking through her words.

“I’m… I’m not sure yet. I’m at the hospital? And I’m waiting for the doctor,” Neil sounds shocked, voice dull.

“Which hospital are you at? We’re flying there as soon as we can,” Wymack says, and Abby nods, grabbing his phone to book tickets.

“Umm, I’m not sure. One minute,” they can hear mumbling while Neil asks someone where they are and Wymacks heart aches for the poor kid. 

“Okay, we’re just at the New York Hospital.”

“I booked our tickets, we’re leaving in an hour okay?” Abby says as soothingly as she can. “We’ll call you when we get there.” Wymack says in lieu of a goodbye.

By the time they make it to New York they each have a few messages from Neil saying that Andrew’s going to be fine, he has a concussion and they’re keeping him for observation, but he’s okay. The relief is palpable after the tension through the flight, and Wymack is glad that Neil thought to tell them.

It’s early in the morning when they get there, so they sleep at a hotel for a few hours while waiting for visiting hours.

It’s far more complicated to get into the room than Wymack thought that it would be. They have to convince the staff that they aren’t journalists or well meaning fans before they’re brought up to the room, and Abby has to show them family photos from Christmas with Neil and Andrew before the nurses decide that they are allowed to see Andrew.

Wymack’s glad for the security but he curses at all the journalists for making it so difficult. They crowd them when they realize who they are visiting, and it takes a security guard and a lot of glaring to part the crowd so they can follow the nurse.

“Can you confirm the Josten Minyard relationship?” One journalist shouts as they walk past.

“Coach Wymack! Coach Wymack, is it true that Minyard’s injury is far worse than they are letting on? And what do you think that means for the team?” another journalist shouts, microphone shoved unceremoniously in his face. Abby pulls him behind her and gives him a warning look not to say anything.

The hallway where Andrews room is located is blissfully calm after the storm downstairs. The nurse indicates which room he’s in, then moves on.

Abby pauses in the doorway and motions for Wymack to step beside her, a look of contentment on her face.

In the room Neil is perched on the bed beside Andrew. He’s a bit pale but there are no visible cuts or bruises and he looks mostly alert. They’re hands are twined together, the silver engagement bands catching the light.

Neil is saying something in a low tone and Andrew squeezes his hand. His mouth tilts up at the corners and looks at Neil with something close to adoration. Wymack tugs Abby away from the door and takes a few steps back to give them their privacy. He texts Neil to tell him that they’ve made it in, and a few minutes later Neil peeks out the door to great them.

He looks exhausted, hair mussed and dark circles under his eyes, but his face brightens when he sees them.

Abby gives him a tight hug before going to sit in the chair beside Andrew who has his usual bored expression. Wymack stops beside Neil and squeezes his shoulder.

“I’m proud of you, kid,” he says, feeling a little choked up. Neil looks up in surprise.

“For what? I didn’t do anything.”

Wymack grins and pats his shoulder before going in to greet Andrew.

“Next time, get back up after you get hit,” he says gruffly to the tiny blond. Andrew raises a brow.

“Did I worry you, old man? You’re getting soft with age.”

Wymack grunts and sits down in the other chair near the foot of the bed. “Not worried, just annoyed. Kevin’s called me 3 times since I got up this morning to make sure you can still play.”

“He’ll be back in a few weeks,” Neil says while he takes back his post at Andrews side. Andrew rolls his eyes and mutters ‘junkie’ under his breath.

Wymack wishes he could be irritated at the long night and unnecessary panic, but he feels so content being in the same place as his kids that his gruffness is softened.

+1

Neil surveys the apartment from his spot in the kitchen. They’re 1 bedroom apartment is not nearly big enough to comfortably fit everyone in, but no one is complaining about the small space. Even Andrew isn’t feeling claustrophobic yet (Neil keeps checking on him, but he seems happy chatting with Aaron and Kevin on the sofa). True to promise, they did throw a wedding party at their apartment, and they made sure that it was at a time that Nicky and Erik could come out to see them. 

However, it took multiple arguments to convince Allison and Nicky that they didn’t need anyone to plan it and that they were just going to get married at the courthouse. Neil’s pretty sure that it was more Renee and Erik than his arguments who made them let it go. No matter what, Neil couldn’t be happier with how everything has turned out.

King winds himself around his ankles, meowing indignantly about the noise in the place and Neil smiles fondly at her.

Matt and Dan are swaying to the music near the balcony door, lost in their own little world. Beside them sway Renee and Allison, and Renee catches Neils eye to smile proudly at him. After Nicky, her and Allison were the next ones they told about the engagement. Andrew had mentioned that it was Renee who convinced him that marriage wasn’t always a bad idea, and Neil couldn’t help but feel a bit grateful for that.

Beside him stood Abby, Wymack, and Bee. Bee has been around long enough that Neil is able to accept her, and he’s glad that Andrew was able to find someone that he trusted so much. Neil has also been going to a therapist, but something about knowing Bee while he was going through everything made it too uncomfortable for him to talk to her. He found someone in New York instead, and Bee seemed so thrilled that he’s managed to open up to someone other than Andrew that Neil almost liked her a little bit. It’s tough to find someone who is genuinely happy about your healing.

Katelyn is laughing with Thea about something, and Erik and Nicky are in the corner cooing over Sir, who is soaking up the attention. 

Neil can’t help but think about all of the trials and tribulations it took to get to this point - the time in the Ravens Nest, the terror of Baltimore, all of the panic attacks and rough nights and foggy days. Neil never thought that he would live through his first year of University so every year after that has felt both like a gift and borrowed time. It took until the past year for Neil to wrap his head around the idea that he might be able to live until old age.

That thought was both a relief and terrifying, just because he wants it so badly. Andrew has helped him pull through multiple panic attacks just thinking about it.

Neil knows that there will be other challenges ahead of them (even though they really deserve a happy 20 years to make up for the bad ones), but he thinks that they’ll be much easier than the crap that’s gone on before this.

He catches Andrews eye across the room. They’re both wearing the suits they got for the occasion and Neils eyes have been tracking Andrew all night. He’s noticed that Andrews have done the same thing for him.

Aaron realizes that Andrews attention has strayed and he turns his conversation to Kevin. Neil and Aaron’s relationship isn’t exactly great, but they’ve managed to get to the point where they can go for coffee without hating each other by the time they get home. Neil knows that Andrew appreciates the effort both of them make, even though he’s never said anything about it.

Neil watches as Andrew gets up and makes his way through their friends, no, their family to get to him.

He watches the crowd impassively beside Neil while Neil watches the small twitch at his lips and the fond look in his eyes. 

“Staring.”

Neil grins. “I guess you’ll have to do something about that, won’t you?”

Andrew’s jaw tightens where he tries not to smile. Neil feels the glow of accomplishment. My husband thinks I’m funny. He tries to keep his expression calm, but he can see from Andrews pink ears that he’s watching him with as much love as he feels.

Abruptly Andrew holds out a hand. “Yes or no.”

Neil isn’t quite sure what he’s asking, but he puts his hand in Andrews without hesitation. “Of course.”

Andrew leads him over to a quiet spot near the hallway and places Neils hands on his shoulder. He grabs his waist and starts to sway to the music. 

“Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what? Like I love you? Because I do,” Andrews ears go red and Neil smirks, feeling very proud of himself for making Andrew blush. 

“You’re a pest,” Andrew says.

“Yeah, but I’m your pest.”

And Andrew laughs. Neil almost trips in surprise. He can feel the eyes of the rest of the party on them, but he can’t tear his eyes off of Andrews smile. 

“Yes or no,” Neil says.

Andrew’s still smiling. “Yes, Junkie.”

Neil kisses Andrews forehead, not wanting to get rid of that beautiful, perfect smile. There’s a flash and Neil turns around to see Nicky holding a camera.

“This is going on the wall! I’m framing it,” he announces, and Andrews glare holds barely any heat.

A few weeks later, when the package from Germany comes, Neil can see how pleased Andrew is with the photo. It sits in a simple silver frame, and they hang it above the sofa.

Neil feels very much like he lives a charmed life.

[dreamterlude]

Vixen Andrew!!! Vixen Andrew!!!!! AaaaaaAAAaAaaaaaAAaA!!

Vixen Andrew!!! vIXEN ANDREW!!!!!

actually has his shit more together and helps katelyn woo aaron

a total beefcake best support ever

training in tank tops w the armbands a literally every fucking body gaping at the Arms

hes the one who names the gc bitchens

he loves his bitchens

at first he hates them all but w time he discovers that a lot of them have also gone through fucking heavy stuff, sometimes even like him

everytime one of the squad (the few ones who actually date men) get her heart broken: hey do u want me to kill that guy for u because it sounds like he sucks and i will totally kill that guy for u

the same with neil, skincare nights are very much A Thing, they also watch stupid movies and sometimes the girls insist on making blanket forts,,, at first andrew refuses everytime but with time he starts to agree and he discovers that its nice, it feels like a better childhood

HOLD UP imagine andrew fucking gushing abt his crush on neil w the cheersquad

"and then he had the fucking nerve to say and as youve always said you want nothing" bitchens: OOOOOOOOO

andrew actually getting better slowly thanks to the girls!!!!! letting himself feel some company!!! the girls just wont let him continue w the bad coping mechanisms and they absolutely wont let him isolate himself (unless he needs some alone time)

he still spars w renee and like thats why he sees the foxes sometimes also how he meets homeboy neil josten

btw more than one vixen has asked for renees number. he is apalled everytime he has to say that shes already dating allison

"whats so great about exy anyway" neil, opening up a 3 hours long powerpoint: well,

i mean hes a cheerleader he gotta cheer for the foxes right but no he keeps his face as dead as possible during the games, he focuses on helping the girls do the backflips and pyramids and whatever shit cheerleaders do

quietly, though, he catches himself cheering everytime neil scores a goal

still fucked up diet of ice cream, sweets, every delicious thing. the vixens dont care as long as hes still able to perform tbh they just let him do whatever

tho!!! they do urge him to get better at the whole eating healthy thing but not like "oh stop eating sweets" more like "pls continue eating sweets But Also other nutritious food"

andrew actually talking abt therapy to some of the girls that need it and encouraging them (in his own pretended indifferent way) to contact bee

he very much still faces riko sometimes and he does so with pompoms on his hands and his arms crossed

oh my god neil would DEFINITELY hum cheerleader by omi when hes around andrew

andrew scowls at him. every time

that songs ends up being neils contact song for andrew for a good 3 months before andrew Notices (hell breaks loose)

andrew and his eidetic memory ft. planning and remembering every move, every step,, boy probably ends up being lead cheerleader (is that even a thing?? who knows, not me)

anon this was an absolute shit show and im the worst at talking about cheerleading but i hope you enjoyed it thanks for your kind attention to my au shitposts

[side-effect-of-the-meds]

Erin and Ania are like holy fuck I can’t even. But for real Neil sees Abby as a mother figure in the book so like is it the same for Ania? Andrew too? Idek I just need to know their relationships with everyone

It’s time I map out their relationships anyways lol so thanks, love!

Let’s start with the lovely Ania 

Dan, Allison, and Ania are roommates. It’s tough after Seth’s death bc Ania has to face her all the time. Erin tells Allison her theory too so Allison is avoiding Ania so :////

Dan is essentially what Matt was to Neil. She sees Ania and her first thought is ‘baby’. She adopts her so fast. Every morning before class, she’ll pinch Ania’s cheeks and kiss her fingers, chef-style Idk man. It’s just something my mom does to me ok. Let me be soft. 

Renee rooms with Erin so Ania isn’t comfortable with her. Anyone that can spend the night in a room with that girl has to be hardcore. 

Allison also gives Ania a lot of shit about her wardrobe. At some point it starts to get to her so when the monsters head to the mall, Erin catches Ania drifting towards the girl’s section on her own. She’s high so she follows her around, prodding her about it. When Ania tells her, there’s this moment where Erin’s drug haze parts for a second. Ania could have sworn that she saw anger flashing in Erin’s eyes for half a second. She shrugs it off until Allison shows up at the dorms with a bruise on her jaw. Erin knows Ania hides her body bc scars and bc she doesn’t like men staring at her. She refuses to let Allison shame Ania into doing something she doesn’t want to. In general, Allison and Ania have a rocky relationship because Erin keeps interfering. After Christmas, the two of them end up getting along a lot better bc they bond while Allison covers Ania’s bruises with makeup. Also after Christmas, Ania and Renee trade dorms so she and Allison aren’t in constant contact. Part of their friction was due to the amount of time they spent together. A lot of things have happened to Allison this year and the fact that she constantly has to see the source of a lot of her problems makes it hard for her to heal.  

I’ve considered Fem!Nicky but I personally prefer Gay/Lesbian solidarity between him and Erin a lot better so yeah (However if you want me to run a few Fem!Nicky hcs, hmu and I’ll do it. She won’t be a part of the fem!verse but it would be fun). He’s exactly the way he is in canon. However, he is constantly trying to set Ania and Erin up and Erin? Doesn’t? Stop? Him? She’s so desperately in love with Ania that if Nicky wingmanning for her is what it takes to win her over, then she’ll take it. She also has a really dirty sense of humor. The jokes he makes fuel her late-night fantasies. 

Aaron is disgusted with Nicky and, more importantly, himself. Ania is incredibly beautiful and he’s incredibly straight. He doesn’t like her bc he’s so gone for Katelyn. That doesn’t make Ania any less pretty. He finds himself staring at her all the time but so does every other fox so he doesn’t feel bad. 

Katelyn thinks Ania is hot. She’s bi but leans heavily towards guys. It takes Aaron a long time to unlearn his homophobia but he manages it because Katelyn is bi and he couldn’t possibly hate anything about her. Once Riko is gone and Ania is safe, she starts to develop feelings. I mean, she always had feelings but now she doesn’t try to suppress them. She lets herself want to be friends with people. Katelyn happens to be at the top of her list. While the twins are with Bee at their sessions, Katelyn and Ania hang out. Sessions are only an hour/hour and a half long so the girls just grab a soda together or go window shopping in Reddin. I hc Katelyn as a genuinely sweet VSCO girl. Let me have this! Ania has a grunge/goth aesthetic because Erin buys her clothes for her but she thinks Katelyn’s clothes are cute too. Erin wants to hate the thousands of scrunchies and anklets she finds strewn across the dorm but they make Ania so happy. Once on a double date, on Bee’s insistence, Katelyn catches sight of a bubblegum pink scrunchie in Erin’s hair. It’s a stark contrast to her all-black outfit but it’s really cute. When Aaron goes to grab their drinks from the barista, Katelyn tells her so making sure to stay well out of Erin’s reach. Erin just grunts and turns to look out the window. The twins don’t blush with their whole face. Instead, their ears turn red. With Erin’s hair pulled up and out of the way, Katelyn has no trouble seeing her burning red ears. It’s progress! 

Ania spends a lot more time out at Evermore as a kid than Neil did. As a result, she was really close to Kevin and Riko. She only knew Jean for like a month before she dipped. I got a request for Fem!Jean so you’ll see Ania’s relationship with Jeanie soon. Kevin sees her as a baby sister. He and Kayleigh were actually at the hospital when Ania was born. There’s a baby photo back at Kayleigh’s old house of 3yr old Kevin carrying a newborn Ania. He’s crying rivers in it. There’s an actual video of it as well. In it, Kay asks him why he’s crying. “She’s sho shmall!” little Kevin sobs. “Can I keep her? Pleashe, mom. I’ll be nice to her and take care of her and I’ll tell her I love her all the time.” You can hear someone laughing in the background. The camera pans across the room to reveal Wymack sitting in a chair by the door, cackling

TANGENT BUT I WANT TO TALK ABOUT WYMACK FOR A MINUTE! So Wymack and Kay are friends with some obvious benefits. He flips his shit when Kevin is born because what if that’s his kid??? Kay is just like, I was with a lot of guys and brushes it off. She’s lying through her teeth. Wymack is the only man she’s ever loved. Tetsuji is salty and I will go into this in another post but I think that Tetsuji really hated Kevin because he was Kay’s son but not his. I absolutely believe that Tetsuji was in love with Kayleigh Day and was pissed when she had a kid. Anyway, Wymack flies out to Ireland a lot to check up on Kay and Kevin because Kay is crazy. How could the inventor of exy not be? It’s literally murder lacrosse. He goes out to make sure Kay isn’t overworking herself and bc Kev has no father figure. Kev grows up knowing Wymack and absolutely adores him. When Kay dies, Wymack wants custody of Kevin. Kay knows who the Moriyamas are and recently she and Tetsuji have been fighting a lot. She’s scared that something is going to happen to her so she writes her will and emphasizes that she wants her son sent to Wymack if she dies. Her fight with Tetsuji comes to a head and the car ‘accident’ happens. It’s not an accident. Tetsuji ordered her killed in a fit of rage. He’s devastated when it actually happens. He loved her and now she’s dead. Well, who’s fault is that, ya dumb bish? He flies out for the funeral and so does Wymack. Tetsu finds the will first and is anger. He has it burned and has Nathan forge a new one where he gets custody of Kev. It breaks Wymack’s heart bc now he thinks Kay didn’t want him around Kev. Kevin is five and he’s crying because his mom is dead and now he can’t live with Wymack. He calls Wymack Dad and Wymack can’t do anything about this. Instead, he just hugs little Kev close and tells him it’ll be okay. Wymack tells Kev that Tetsu has a niece his age. Maybe Kev and Riko can be friends. Maybe they’ll even get married. Kevin says that’s disgusting and Wymack laughs a hollow laugh. Anyway, that’s how Kev gets shipped to Evermore. Tetsu doesn’t allow Wymack near Kev bc he knows the truth. The reason why Wymack always has a sports channel on because he used to keep it on in case Kev ever showed up. He watched every one of Kev’s games and interviews and everything. Wymack doesn’t get to be there to watch Kev grown up so he just watched from a distance. I'm not crying you are. 

Wymack is a father figure to Ania and Erin. He’s there when Ania is born bc he went to visit Kay and Kev who were in Baltimore to meet baby Nathania. Kay carts him out to the hospital to meet her too. Nathan Wesninski was not in the room when his daughter was born. He doesn’t even meet her until she’s six months old. Wymack is the first man Nathania meets and she doesn’t even know. Mary didn’t want to hand Nathania over to Wymack but she and Kay are friends and she knows that he’s her baby daddy. Wymack doesn’t recognize Ania because he only knew her for a month when she was a newborn. Of course he doesn’t recognize her. However, he thinks about her a lot. She’s actually the first baby he’s ever held. He didn’t get to hold Kevin until he was two. Wymack treats Ania the same way he treats Neil but he puts in a bit of extra care bc he knows about Millport incident. 

Abby is definitely as much of a mom figure as she was to Neil. However, after she shows her her scars, Ania gets a lot closer to her. She refuses to tell her things but when Erin gets sent to Easthaven, Ania has a hard time staying at the dorms. She spends all her time at the court bc she has to. She hides in the library bc it’s the one place she wouldn’t see Erin anyways. She crashes at Abby’s a few times because there are times she can’t stand the thought of going back to the dorms without feeling the brush of Erin’s hand on the back of her neck. 

Oh. That’s a thing. Every night after midnight practice n Kev has gone to his room, Ania says goodnight to Erin. Erin will trail her hand across the back of Ania’s neck as she passes in response. It makes Ania shiver because her neck is as much of an erogenous zone as Erin’s is. Erin always watches it out of the corner of her eye bc God it’s the most amazing thing she’s ever seen. It makes her feel. Ania doesn’t really realize???? She’s so dumb. She knows it makes her feel good but she just can’t for the life of her figure out why. 

It’s time I addressed the real psycho lesbian… While Erin’s is a facade, Riko is genuinely psychotic. She’s seven types of crazy. Actually, it skews a little more yandere but I will go into depth about it in the Fem!Jean fic. Rn, I’ll try to keep it short. Riko has her first crush when she’s eight? Nine? She kisses her crush on the cheek when she’s ten and Tetsuji… doesn’t take it well to say the least. The bit about it’s easier to remain straight? It’s the thing Kevin hears Riko say to herself every morning in front of the mirror. Regardless, Riko never gets over that first crush. Riko will never not miss Nathania Wesninski. When she finds out who Ania really is? She loses it. It’s fate, she tells herself. She will have Ania or die trying. Christmas at Evermore is a thing so I mean, I guess she does have Ania :( But she wants Ania to love her. She tells Ania as much and Ania spits in her face. :)

Most of Erin’s relationships are the same except for the Matt and Renee thing I covered earlier. The only other one that changes is Kevin. I know I say this a lot, but she really thought Ania and Kev would be a thing. She says no to Kevin for everything bc she’s petty.  Kevin has always gotten everything that he wanted handed to him on a silver plate. Now he’s taking the one thing she really wants.  If he gets Ania, he can’t have anything else. Again, I’ll cover her relationship with Jean later. 

Thanks again your ask <3

Edit: I'm really tired and have a quiz tomorrow but I forgot to talk about Cleo. I'll make a separate post about her so stay tuned for that!!!

[ashrelfury]

Getting A Neil For Christmas

Alright guys!! This is my gift to @exactly13percent for the @aftgexchange 2018!!! This isn’t exactly what you wanted, but I hope you’re happy with it anyways. I’m so not used to writing One-Shots!! I wanted to keep it short, but I also wanted to make it way longer, so I had to end it before I made it a chaptered fic that I DO NOT HAVE TIME TO DO!! lol Here you to, From @ashrelfury to @exactly13percent! Enjoy!!

-------------------

There’s something wrong with Josten.

Andrew had come to the conclusion a long fucking time ago, that there was more to Neil Josten than meets the eye. Fuck everything Aaron has to say about it.

Actually, fuck what everybody has to say about it.

It’s like the little asshole has just about everyone dancing in the palm of his hand. He’s well liked, respected, admired, he is everything Andrew hated in any of the other kids at any of the other houses he’d lived in before.

Mr. Perfect.

No fucking way.

Neil Josten had secrets, and it seemed that Neil was the only one curious enough to look beyond the polite little smile, the quiet demeanor, and the innocent face. No one else seemed to notice the way those fake brown eyes searched for all of the exits to every room they entered, or how stiff that lithe runner’s body got when big men yelled, or the careful way he seemed to check the roots of his dark brown hair on every reflective surface he passes.

To be honest though, if Andrew were inclined to be honest, he’d never actually expected something like this.

Neil Josten, sitting on their couch, huddled over a hot chocolate he wasn’t planning on drinking, supporting so many bandages and injuries that Andrew could barely see the light tan color of his skin below the red and purple, dark brown hair suddenly a shocking rusty red that seemed to fit him better, and dull brown eyes transformed into the most chilling ice blue Andrew had ever seen.

“Aaron’s not here, you know.” Andrew said. They were the first words he’d spoken out loud since the boy had knocked on his door almost two hours ago, bleeding and bruised to hell. He hadn’t even asked the damn boy anything as he stepped outside to let Neil in.

They didn’t share words as Andrew attempted to help Neil treat the injuries as best they good (Andrew wasn’t going to take the credit there, he had minimal knowledge with first aid, but he’d read the books and knew what to do. Not like that mattered though, Josten seemed to have practical experience with stitching himself up, and fuck if that little bit of knowledge didn’t made Andrew clench his fists in a hot sort of protective rage that he was not expecting at all.)

Afterwards, he’d led Neil to the couch in a pair of sweatpants that were Andrew’s at one point, but he was pretty sure he’d never touch again now that they’d been up against Neil’s skin, and a hoodie that most likely belonged to Aaron, not that it mattered because Josten was his brother’s fucking friend in the first place.

After making hot chocolate for both of them, he sat down on the low coffee table in front of the couch and stared at Neil, who had curled up on himself, warm mug in hand but nowhere near his mouth. They sat there like that for a good ten minutes, before Andrew decided now would be a very good time for answers.

“I know. I wouldn’t have come if I wasn’t sure he wasn’t going to be here.” Neil said, and that didn’t answer fuck all, but okay.

“Nicky’s in Germany.” Andrew went with.

“I know. I’m not here for him either.”

And…

Okay.

Andrew’s eyebrow hiked up on its own accord, but it was probably the most honest reaction he’s had all night. “So what the fuck are you doing here, Josten.”

Neil sighed, loud and long, but it still wasn’t an answer. There was no hiding the fact that he sounded just as tired as he looked

Silence surrounded them like oppressive restraints for a long moment. Andrew was pretty confident he could out last Josten though. He’d seen Josten in school, surrounded by his friends, chatting about sports and schoolwork and anything else under the sun. He’d watched Josten enough to know that silence unnerved the other boy. All he had to do, was wait him out.

It took an hour.

An entire fucking hour, but when Neil spoke, it was not what Andrew had expected at all.

“No one else knows.”

Andrew frowned, already more than a little annoyed with this whole conversation and it only just started to get interesting now. “No one else knows what?”

“No one else notices its fake. Me. My personality, my hair, everything. No one else noticed in the three years I’ve been living here, but you arrive and it doesn’t take you a month to notice all of it. I didn’t have anyone else to go to.” Neil’s voice was hollow. Dead and buried at this point and it was a bit unnerving. Hell, the fact that Neil had noticed that he had noticed was unnerving. It meant Neil Josten was far more perceptive than Andrew gave him credit for.

“So?”

Fuck, that was so weak.

But it got a reaction.

Blazing blue eyes snapped up to meet his and the kicked puppy on his couch glared for only a second before his expression closed down again. The bruises so much worse when you were looking at them head on.

“So I came here. You already don’t trust who I was, so it wouldn’t surprise you. You wouldn’t overreact like Matt or Dan, and you wouldn’t ask as many questions as Allison, and you wouldn’t kick me out like Kevin.” Neil explained.

And Andrew got it.

He’d seen through Neil, maybe not all of it, but he had and that made him safe right now. When everything else was knocked down, when all of his secrets hung on a fucking cliff, it was easier to come to someone who had seen you for the fraud you are.

“I still have questions.”

Fuck did he have questions. A shit ton of questions that he wasn’t sure for how much longer he could hold back. His only hope was for Neil to start speaking. Fast.

“That’s okay. I know about you, you know? Orphan, abusive foster homes, Tilda. I know you killed her. Aaron told me you made him a promise to protect him. I know the car accident wasn’t an accident.”

Andrew’s blood froze. His body went unnaturally still, his own hands clenching around the empty mug of his own long-gone hot chocolate. But before he could decide what to do, Neil spoke up again.

“It’s okay. I’m not going to tell anyone. I think you did the right thing. I would have done the same I think… or… I’d want someone to do it for me.” There was more to those words than Andrew could take at face value, but that was fine. He needed to calm himself back down before he tried to speak, because if he tried now, he was going to growl and yell.

“Your mother?” Andrew finally managed.

Neil startled, blue eyes wide with surprise, but there was something else.

“Ah. Mother and father.” Andrew deduced.

Neil’s eyes closed tight, some kind of pain kitting his brows as his head lowered. Andrew felt the need to reach out, run a hand through messy red hair that fit this boy so much better than the straight dark brown of before. He’d hit the fucking bullseye.

“Are they dead.”

His answer came in the form of a sharp nod.

“Were they the ones to hurt you?”

Pause. Head tilt. Slow careful nod. Ah, so just one. Father? It was more likely, given Josten’s reaction to older men, but the way he spoke about Tilda was revealing. Or maybe it was more than just his parents. Did his father have a mistress who’d also hurt him? Or was it his mother who kept someone on the side?

Andrew was quiet again, as he watched emotions flash through the usually walled up face of Neil fucking Josten.

It took long minutes before either of them spoke. In the end, it was Neil.

“I’m in the Witness Protection Program. Or, I was. I guess that now that my father’s dead, I’ll be out on my own again.”

Fuck.

Witness Protection.

It didn’t leave Andrew with a lot of information, but it was enough.

“Your father is a gang leader? Mob boss? Serial killer?” Bingo, bingo, and bingo. Josten’s face was readable from space, the small subtle flinches gave Andrew all the answers he needed. “Are you leaving town?” it wasn’t an important question. It didn’t really matter in the long run, but for some reason, it was the first real question Andrew’s mind could come up with. The only one he really wanted an answer to.

It was obviously not the question Neil was waiting for though. Wide eyes came back up again and that thin, tempting mouth opened and closed for a few moments, before it finally seemed to sink in.

“No. I… I don’t have anywhere else to go. Nothing else out there. It’ll be easier to stay.”

Shit, the relief Andrew felt was sort of overwhelming.

He’d always known there was something off with Neil Josten, but nothing like this. It was all so much more… interesting.

“Alright.” Was all Andrew said.

With that, he stood up. He paid no attention to the confused look Neil kept shooting at him as he collected both their mugs, his empty and Neil’s still full, took them to the kitchen skin, then went to the hall closet to grab a spare pillow and one of the many blankets Nicky had a habit of buying every Black Friday. Which so far, had been two, but in those two years, they’d gathered 5 stupid fleece blankets his cousin favored.

He dumped his load on the couch next to Neil, and walked away.

“Be here in the morning.” Andrew ordered, and then made his way upstairs and into his own room.

If Neil stayed, they’d talk a bit more. If not, Andrew would deal. It wouldn’t be the first time in his life he’d ever been disappointed.

--

Neil had stayed.

Fuck, Neil Josten had stayed and now Andrew wasn’t sure what to do exactly. So he made breakfast.

Neil was awake, huddled up in a ball by the corner of the couch watching Andrew work on some chocolate chip pancakes through the open half of the bar that separated the kitchen from the living room. Andrew, meanwhile, ignored him completely.

Aaron would be back from Katelyn’s house at some point past noon and he and Neil needed to have things worked out by then. Andrew had an idea, but he wasn’t sure how receptive Neil would be to the idea.

Oh well. He wouldn’t make it a request.

Once he finished 7 pancakes, he put two on a plate and kept the rest for himself, grabbing a can of condensed milk. He preferred it to syrup because it was sweeter and set off the chocolate chips pretty nicely.

He sat down and began to eat, not paying Neil Josten any attention, but watching carefully from under his eyelashes.

Neil was like a skittish colt. He was obviously hungry, it was written all over his face as he took a whiff of the pancake smell coming from the kitchen, but he was hesitating moving closer. Like if he got off the couch, he’d be beaten again, or worse, kicked out. Andrew didn’t try to reassure him, just watched.

It took a long half hour, but Neil finally made it to the other side of their bar/table/counter area, pulled out the stool with a wince, and sat down. He looked at the pancakes, then at Andrew, then at the glass of milk beside the plate, and back again at Andrew. The blond scowled.

Another long moment late, Neil finally picked up the fork Andrew had left out, and began to eat.

The deep slices up his inner forearms were stitched up with dental floss from what Andrew could see, his knuckles and the top of his hands marked in circular burn marks that resembled a dashboard lighter in a car. Andrew’s stomach rolled without his permission and he scowled again. In the light of day, all of Neil’s injuries looked so much worse than when they’d been handling them last night. Thinking about it though, he’d need to grab the burn cream for those hands again.

When Neil was done with his first pancake, he finally spoke.

“When is Aaron coming back?”

Andrew glanced up from where he’d been running his finger through the rest of the condensed milk topping left at the bottom of his plate and sucking it off, to answer. “Sometime in the afternoon.”

“Oh. Okay.” And that was it. Silence came again.

Andrew was annoyed by it. With everyone else Josten had ever met, he was able to talk openly and smile and put on this Mr. Perfect act, but with Andrew he suddenly became this mute, abused animal, like Andrew would hurt him should he say the wrong thing.

Andrew wanted to hurt him just for that assumption.

With an indifferent look on his face, Andrew went to put his dishes in the sink before going to the bowl on the edge of Neil’s side of the bar/counter/table, grabbing his keys prying out one of them.

Neil watched all the while, his own face blank but his posture stiff, ready to run at any sign of a threat. Andrew had to grit his teeth not to snarl at the skinny bastard.

When the key was off the keychain of a black car, he tossed it underhanded to the red-head. Neil’s instincts were good, he played exy as a starting striker, so he caught it effortlessly, but the pain of his injuries had obviously been jostled, because he instantly let go of the key with a sharp cry of pain. Andrew ignored it.

“You can stay. You can leave. I don’t care.”

And then he walked away, back to his own room.

He still had questions. He still wanted answers. He wanted Neil to stay.

But above all of that, he wanted Neil to choose to stay. If Neil could do that one more time, Andrew would be allowed to question and finally understand what the fuck was really wrong with Neil Josten.

Besides, Aaron should be here when Andrew interrogated his best friend. His brother already hated him for taking Tilda away, and though Neil had always felt wrong in some irritating way, he’d never been a threat, Andrew wouldn’t get rid of him just yet.

He’d wait for what Aaron had to say, and decide from there. If the idiot stayed.

--

Neil was at the end of whatever rope he’d had left.

If he were honest with himself, something he wasn’t very inclined to do on his best days, he’d admit that Andrew made him feel safe.

Neil had known Aaron for 3 years. If Neil had any real friends left in school, it’d be Aaron, Dan, and Matt. Maybe Allison too, but she had a habit of being cynical and snide and Neil wasn’t sure if she liked him or not. She saw how fake he was from the get go, but it never seemed to bother her.

Andrew though… Andrew was different.

When the other twin had come out of the woodwork, it had been Neil who’d witnessed Aaron’s mental breakdowns, as well as his hidden excitement at having a brother. At being able to finally share his suffering with someone else. Neil wasn’t sure he understood that. All of his suffering he’d shared with his mother and it had never made him feel anything but pain and fear.

Still, Neil had been there, keeping Aaron from spiraling into the drugs Tilda tried to get him addicted too, and keeping the worst of the abuse at bay by keeping Aaron in the Exy team at school and away from home as much as possible.

Then… Andrew showed up. And everything seemed to change.

Within six months, Tilda was dead, and Aaron told Neil about Andrew’s promise. Protection, a shield from the thing that wanted to hurt him, in exchange for 3 years of closeness.

Fuck… wasn’t that exactly what Neil wanted more than his next breath?

After losing his mother nearly year prior and running to the FBI as a result, he’d felt adrift and paranoid. Fear dogged his steps and he was slowly falling apart behind the act he’d kept up flawlessly at school.

To have someone to trust at his back, to finally put down the weight of his lies. It was Neil’s biggest wish.

Yet, Andrew had gone above and beyond. Actually killing Tilda for laying hands on Aaron again after the warnings didn’t work. Neil had been in awe.

He’d started to watch Andrew from that moment on. He’d noticed the way Andrew watched him back, suspicious hazel eyes constantly glued to him. Nothing escaped Andrew Joseph Minyard. But instead of feeling pressured and fearful, Neil began to covet that gaze. If Andrew was watching him, no one would be able to get to him without the blond knowing.

He was protected.

It was just his luck that Lola came for him during winter break… the only time he wouldn’t be around Andrew because Aaron had suddenly found a girlfriend and they wouldn’t be able to hang out at Nicky’s house that week.

When his Uncle had come to his rescue, guns blazing, Neil had been left in a basement full of bodies and so many more scars he could no longer hide them from anyone.

Even with his Uncle there, desperate to help him and support him, Neil couldn’t feel safe. He was on edge, he didn’t sleep. He only asked to be brought back to Columbia.

It took his Uncle 4 days to concede.

He was dropped of at the apartment the US Marshals had gotten for him, and he’d walked the two miles needed to reach the Minyard-Hemmick residence.

He must have done something very right in a past life, because the only person there was the one twin he was looking for, and when Andrew let him in without speaking one word, Neil finally felt himself relax.

On the couch, seated across from Andrew, Neil was finally safe again. Those intense hazel eyes watching him like they always had, making him feel seen… known.

He was ready to tell Andrew everything. To finally let all the lies go.

Only… Andrew didn’t ask any of the probing question Neil had been expecting.

He’d been a bit disappointment, honestly, but he’d let it go. The truth would be heard sooner or later and then it would no longer be Neil’s burden to carry alone.

Neil looked down at the key in his hand. Andrew’s house key, he recognized it from the times he’d had to bring Aaron home after a night at some random senior’s house party. He’d used Aaron’s key to open the front door many times, but… this was different. Wasn’t it?

He couldn’t stop his thumb from running over the key’s teeth. Imprinting the feel and shape of them into his skin with a desperation he didn’t realize he still held.

There was a pressure behind his eyes that he didn’t recognize and his vision began to get fuzzy.

Neil jumped a bit when something wet dripped onto his hand.

Reaching up to figure out where he was bleeding, he startled again when he realized the wetness wasn’t blood.

He was crying.

Fuck, he was actually fucking crying!

Just as sudden as the realization came, the emotions soon followed. Relief, bitter resentment, fear, safety, confusion, and a bone deep loneliness made him double over. Neil crouched there in Andrew’s living room, holding the single key in both hands and pressing it to his forehead as he silently sobbed.

Aaron would be home soon, Neil needed to get himself together…

But maybe this one it would be okay to fall apart.

He was safe here.

Andrew was here.

He was safe.

--

*A Year Later*

“Shut up and open the door, Junkie.”

Neil smiled into the collar of his jacket as he pulled out his keys.

“I’m just trying to thank you for the game, ‘Drew. You didn’t have to save that last shot.” Neil argued back just to keep Andrew talking as the blond collected the bags from the back of their Maserati.

“Fuck you. Lock the car.” Was Andrew’s only answer.

Neil snorted, but as he opened the front door, he fingered the car key on his ring and locked the black beauty’s doors as requested.

“Is Nicky going to be back from Germany yearly like last year? Or are we picking him up on our way to Palmetto?” Neil asked, knowing Andrew would remember better than himself.

“We’re picking him up.”

“Good. That means we get the house all to ourselves for the whole week.” Neil grinned wickedly, bright blue eyes on the short blond as he pushed past and up the stairs to the bedroom they shared.

“Kevin’s coming to pick us up in 3 days for the ‘Extra Spring Break Practice With Wymack’ you agreed to.” Andrew reminded him tonelessly.

Neil winced. Shit, he’d forgotten that.

“Do we have to go?” He asked a little petulantly.

“No.”

“Then we won’t.”

“I think that’s the first smart thing to have ever come out of your mouth, Josten.”

Andrew walked back down the stairs with empty arms, pulling his jacket off as he went and throwing it carelessly over one of the kitchen bar stools.

Neil went to him almost unconsciously. “What about Aaron?”

“Montana with Katlyn. We have to pick him up on Saturday.” Andrew’s eyes resembled smooth whiskey as he watched Neil’s careful approach, but he didn’t move to meet him, nor did he move away.

Raising his hands, Neil asked, “Yes or no?”

The blond took a long moment to answer, but when he did, his own hands came up. “Yes.”

Two callused palms pressed against either side of his hips, while Andrew’s own came around Neil’s neck.

When their lips met, Andrew thought about this time last year.

He thought about opening the front door to a broken and bleeding liar. Thought about his decision to let that lair stay. Thought about this fucked up lair being his twin brother’s best friend.

Fuck yeah there was something wrong with Neil Josten.

That was fine with Andrew though. The Junkie wasn’t a threat…

Josten was his.

[jemej3m]

to the moon and back (p3)

last part!

(i realised i forgot warnings for the last one! sorry, i’ll try and edit that asap)

tw: canon typical rape, violence

part one | part two | part three

Andrew didn’t regret.

Or, he was trying to live a regret-less life. As a 17 year old, he wasn’t exactly a master of his own thoughts. But no matter what he did, he tried not to doubt himself, or dwell on it.

Some said that made him keen for collateral damage. That he took no responsibility.

Andrew didn’t care about what anyone said.

So, when he finally decided to ignore the wheedling voice in his head, it was—

Well, a disaster. But also, not a disaster.

Neil had just won his semi-finals with his Foxes, and Andrew watched his brother, best friends and the boy he definitely didn’t care about laugh and sway from side-to-side, exuberant and stupid with success. Andrew’d been invited to the celebratory party, of which he’d decided to attend under the pretence of ‘free alcohol’ and ‘Someone has to drive you home, Aaron.’

In honesty, he hadn’t consumed alcohol since going on his antidepressants. And he knew that his brother would just pass out and stay the night with Katelyn, who’s parents were out. Betsy was chill, but she wasn’t that chill.

Kevin was leaning into his girlfriend—Thea Muldani had just graduated from Evermore, already accepted for a sports scholarship in West Virginia, and found herself in the disgraced company of jeering Foxes—as he offered her a half-full cup. Probably Vodka. Kevin drank like his father would send him to rehab in the morning, every time.

Aaron was dancing, Boyd, Gordon, Wilds and Reynolds were keeping Renee busy, but not busy enough for her to spare the wink she sent towards Andrew, gesturing to Neil.

Neil was sipping a soda, looking at him. Andrew rose his eyebrow, challenging his gaze. The boy simply stood, turned and left out the front door.

Andrew, obviously, had no choice but to follow.

“You just won. What’s the doom and gloom about?” Andrew mirrored the way he leaned onto the front porch’s railing.

“I’m scared about my dad coming back.” He looked at Andrew. “I’m not allowed to go out. What if he comes back and the house is empty?”

They were going to contact the police tomorrow: They’d found the body yesterday, but Neil had been too nervous with the semi-finals game. Now that it was out of the way and dealt with, Neil had to shove his uneasiness aside and just do it.

“He’s not going to come back.” Andrew reminded him. “We’re the only two people who know right now. He’s not coming back tonight, Neil.”

He nodded weakly and said nothing, but Andrew could hear the cogs whirring under the pretty red curls.

“What.” He said flatly.

“I—“ He looked at Andrew. As far as he knew, Neil never let himself be scared in front of someone like this. No one. “He’s going to kill me, Andrew.”

Andrew ignored his conscience and cupped Neil’s jaw with his hand, wearing the most stern expression he could muster. “I won’t let him touch you.”

Neil looked down at him and nodded once.

Slowly, giving time for Neil to lean away, Andrew kissed him gently. He tried to stop the shaking in his hands, the chattering of his teeth, but it was impossible, when unwanted images popped up behind closed eyelids but Neil was right there. He was so torn. So fucking torn.

Neil’s lips were slightly chapped and tasted like lemonade. Andrew could feel the flutter of his eyelashes against his cheeks. The tip of his nose was soft where it brushed against his, and Andrew’s heart was thudding so loudly that surely Neil had to have heard it.

When he stepped back, dropping his hand and taking in a nervous breath, he watched Neil slowly open his eyes.

“You like me,” The dumbass said, astounded.

Andrew’s ire twitched. “No shit, idiot.”

Neil winced. “Sorry, I—“

“Shut up. Shut up.” Andrew pinched his lips shut with his fingers, terrified of what Neil was going to say, because, he already knew the answer. Because Andrew was fucked up and Neil wasn’t even gay and there was no way in hell that he would ever reciprocate this—

Andrew regretted.

“Don’t say anything.” Andrew warned him. Neil looked at him, confused, as he paced away. Before he had the chance to do the opposite of what Andrew told him to, Andrew turned, running with his car keys already in his hand.

His mind was blank. He tried to conjure up any thought or feeling, anything at all, but all he could manage was I fucked up. I fucked up. I fucked up.

He thought Neil had stayed on the porch and resigned to watching him leave, but a shadowed figure ran in front of his car. Andrew slammed the brakes and threw himself out of the car with vengeance: If he could see himself, he imagined steam coming out of his ears. The idiot was caught in his headlights, cheeks as red as his hair and eyes bright with adrenaline.

“Are you fucking serious?” He snarled. “What are you doing, throwing yourself a car like that—“

Neil held Andrew by the jaw and kissed him, squarely on the mouth, effectively shutting up Andrew’s reprimanding and sending his pathetic, teenage mind into a frenzy. He instinctively grabbed Neil’s scarred hands and took them away from his face, holding them down and away from him. He couldn’t, however, resist entwining their fingers together as they stood in the middle of the quiet street, illuminated by his headlights and cocooned by the ignition warning and party music in the background.

Neil broke off, breathless and smiling, just a little bit.

“Kevin told me to stop pining over you, weeks ago.” Neil admitted, in the close proximity between them. “I didn’t even realise I was pining. Or that I like you at all.”

I like you, Andrew’s mind echoed giddily. “You’re so stupid.”

“I know.” Neil agreed.

“Don’t touch me.” Andrew warned.

“Okay.” He accepted, putting his hands in his pockets. He nudged Andrew’s nose with his own, his smile blindingly adorable. “Hey.”

“I hate you.” Andrew grumbled

“To the moon and back?” Neil teased.

Andrew shushed him with a weak growl, kissing him into silence.

“AJ,” A smug voice came from just behind him.

Andrew’s mind slowed down to the point of dysfunction. It was a year, exactly a year, since Andrew had last seen or heard from the man. It was ironic that his worst nightmare would come to life on a day Andrew had been ecstatic for: A day, just for him and Neil. A day where he would kiss Neil again.

The police had been anonymously tipped. Andrew had sought out Officer Higgins to warn him about how Nathan Wesninski had previously bought out a murder investigation, and that he was high-risk and absolutely could not be allowed bail. The pig had taken it seriously, as he always did with Andrew. Especially since Andrew and Aaron had anonymously provided him with invaluable details on abusive foster homes. He owed Andrew a favour, so he knew that Higgins would come through.

Neil, with his many, many issues, had naturally ingrained trust issues in all police. If Betsy was murdered and the murderer managed to buy out the investigation, Andrew wouldn’t trust them with even a penny either.

Neil trusted Andrew, though, so he had to trust Higgins.

Soon, the police would gain a search warrant to the house, and Neil would have nothing to do with it: it was being kept as extremely confidential, to avoid Nathan’s ears from alerting the man himself. The search and consequential discovery would surely notify Neil’s father, who remained up in Baltimore, but by then it would too late. Neil would be safe. A dead body would be found in Nathan’s cellar. There was no escaping prison, this time around.

The uneven, sarcastic grin and menacing glint to the junkie’s eyes had returned. Andrew sat on the hood of his car, waiting for Neil as Exy practise finished, reading Jekyll and Hyde for the nth time and smoking. He’d been at peace, thinking vaguely about telling Neil how he felt, his final results, his plans for the summer.

Until Drake had appeared at his side.

“Higgins said I might find you here.” His ex-boyfriend pulled himself up onto the hood of his car, next to Andrew. Andrew was frozen. “When he told me that you’d got yourself mixed up in a murder investigation, I couldn’t believe it. It’s not like you to cause trouble.” He could hear the threat in Drake’s voice. He could hear that sickening, sickening grin. “Is your mom home?”

It was a trick question: Drake knew that she wouldn’t be. Thursday nights was one of her two late nights volunteering at Easthaven.

“How about Aaron?” Drake laughed softly. “Speak of the devil. Aaron!”

“Drake? What are you doing in town?” Aaron smiled, speaking casually. He didn’t know. He didn’t know, because Andrew had never told him: Andrew’d never told anyone, except—

“Just visiting Mom before my first employment.” They talked like friends, because they had been friends. Oh, fuck. Andrew was going to be sick. “Andrew picking you up?”

“Oh, no.” Aaron shook his head. “I spend Thursdays with my girlfriend, Katelyn.” Aaron was looking at Andrew now. He hoped Aaron could see the red flags, but he knew that his brother wouldn’t: He was always tired after practise, and it was getting. In his head Andrew was screaming, as though that would help Aaron to see. It didn’t work.

Drake’s grin widened. “Oh, cool. Have fun!”

“Will do.” Aaron saluted the two of them. “Oh, Andrew, he’s just talking to Coach—“

“We’re going.” Andrew managed, sliding off the car and rounding to the driver’s door. If Aaron mentioned Neil, Drake would assume, and then—and then he might—Neil didn’t—he couldn’t—

Andrew let out the smallest of sobs before Drake could open the car door and slide inside. His hands gripped the steering wheel as he swerved out of the school’s parking lot.

He closed his eyes and wished this all to be a horrible, horrible dream.

When he opened them, his vision was fragmented, like shattered glass shards. It was dark in his bedroom, just how he always remembered this happening. His arms hurt, bruised by Drake’s fingers. His armbands were gone, knives were gone, defences were gone, and yet—

Drake was gone, too.

Andrew scrambled upright, almost dry heaving with the effort. He reached out and grabbed for the first thing he could, but it wasn’t a knife, or a lamp, or anything he could use to defend himself. It was a fistful of soft fabric, that smelled like Neil’s laundry soap. The raised scarring beneath was Neil’s skin. Distantly, he thought, impossible, but the wiry limbs and red curls were not Drake, so Andrew couldn’t care less.

His awareness came in bits-and-pieces. He realised Neil had covered him with a sheet, and that they weren’t the only two people in the room.

Aaron was standing with an Exy stick—Neil’s striker stick—over his head.

“Give me a good reason not to crush you to a pulp right now!”

Andrew’s attacker was a crumpled head on the floor. How had two teenage midgets beaten a training soldier so badly?

The volume of Aaron’s yelling made Andrew’s ears ring.

“Get out. Get out!”

Neil let go of Andrew to stick a knife at Drake’s throat—Andrew’s knife. The man paused, terrified in the presence of these tiny, psycho teenagers. “If you ever come near him again, I will make sure you spend the rest of your short life in prison. I heard rapists never last very long.”

“Get out.” Aaron echoed, shoving him with the butt of the Exy stick. Neil grabbed it off him and gestured towards Andrew, before disappearing.

Andrew’s twin fell onto his knees in front of him. “Are you okay? Do you need to go to hospital? You’re bleeding so much.”

“Did he hurt you?”

Aaron shook his head. They clutched onto each other. “Why didn’t you tell me, Andrew?”

“I didn’t know how.” He muttered. “I couldn’t tell you or Mom. I just didn’t know how.”

“But Neil knew.” Aaron murmured. “I told him that you’d gone home with Drake, your old friend. He went white and forced me to come back here.”

Neil looked at him from under his eyelashes. “What?”

“I want to know what your father’s name is.” Andrew knew his father had created a falsified identity for Neil to attend Evermore with, which he maintained at Palmetto. He also knew he was named after his father, in the typical, egocentric European fashion.

“You’ll have to tell me something that no one else knows, too.”

Andrew swallowed. “Okay.”

“Nathan.” Neil said, softly.

“You don’t seem like a Nathan.”

“I’m not.” He turned to look at Andrew. “I’m Nathaniel.”

For a moment, they sat in silence.

Then Neil’s fingers drifted to take the cigarette from between Andrew’s fingers. “Why did you hurt yourself?” His hand drifted over the black armbands, never touching.

Andrew forgot that Neil was irritatingly perceptive sometimes. “It was the only way I could keep myself from telling people how my boyfriend was hurting me.”

Neil said nothing at that, fingers drifting over his own scars. “He’d better be far away from here.”

It was an unexpected streak of protectiveness that had warmth blossoming in Andrew’s chest. “He left for military training after graduating last year.”

Neil nodded, satisfied. Andrew closed his eyes. Telling someone lifted that weight off his shoulders. The lightness was incredible.

“Just—“ Aaron pulled him up, keeping the sheets around him. “Come to my room. I’m calling Mom.”

Andrew let himself lean against his brother and said nothing to fight him. It was beyond time to tell them the truth. “Neil?”

“Right here.” A soft voice said from the stairwell.

“Go home.” Andrew croaked.

Neil hesitated, curls bouncing, gaze unwavering, but promptly vanished. Aaron tucked him in under his own covers, sitting by him on the floor and leaning their foreheads together. Andrew knew he was on the phone to Betsy.

“Andrew, I’m coming home.” His mother’s voice lulled him, the remnants of anxiety and adrenaline washing away with her soothing voice. “I love you to the moon and back, honey. I’ll see you soon.”

He couldn’t find it within himself to reply: The pull of exhaustion was irresistible and he fell fast asleep within moments.

He dreamt of a happy teenaged boy, in a peaceful home with his brother and his mother. They were all safe. He had everything he ever wanted.

Even in the dream, Andrew knew it was impossible.

Neil was leaning against his—Andrew’s—car as he came out of his front door, waiting for him.

“You know, a ‘good morning’ is a commonplace greeting used in the English language—“

Andrew grabbed him with handfuls of his ugly hoodie and said: “Yes or no?” When Neil nodded, he kissed him against his own car. Neil made a small noise. Andrew couldn’t remember whether or not it was characteristic of Neil: They had only kissed at the semi-finals celebration, two and and half months ago.

Two months ago, Drake had been effectively banished by Aaron and Neil—two weeks after that kiss. Neil’s father had been arrested a mere week after that, forcing Andrew to come out of his shell to comfort Neil in his panic. Then Neil had withstood a long, agonising trial about his abuse and his mother’s murder. No, he had not known there was someone in the cellar, or who that person was. Nor did he know his father’s tendency to murder resistant employees. Nor was it reasonable to ask for a child to report their murderous father after being threatened and hurt by said man.

Andrew thought the trial was unnecessarily long for something so simple, and Neil had been the heart of it. He had accompanied Neil home from Columbia Courthouse every evening, sat with him and a cigarette outside Wymack’s apartment, until Neil had managed a weak goodbye and went inside.

Never did Andrew dare to kiss him. Neil, equally as distraught, never tried or asked. Now a week after his father’s conviction and resulting imprisonment, Neil was looking at Andrew with the original snarky grin that caught Andrew’s attention during tutoring sessions, the brilliant spark returning to his eyes.

Andrew felt much, much better.

“Hey.” Neil murmured, sandwiched between the car and the car’s owner.

“Hey.” Andrew returned. Today they were going to get school supplies. Things would be going back to normal -- with one new, exciting addition.

Neil pecked a small kiss on Andrew’s cheek.

“I hate you.” He grumbled.

“To the moon and back, I know.” Neil said with his small grin. Andrew couldn’t help but flush.

A cab caught his interest, swinging into the driveway opposite Betsy’s quaint cottage home. Neil stood back, following Andrew’s line of sight and watching the cab as its passenger door opened and a young man clambered out. The cabbie grabbed a large suitcase from the boot as the man tied up his hair wrapping his arms around his stomach as he crossed the road.

The car had hidden Andrew and Neil from view until the man had stepped onto the pavement, spotting them standing by the car garage. His eyes were hooded, circles underneath darkened with exhaustion, brown skin having lost its colour and his hair a matted mess of dark curls. The cab peeled off after payment and the man turned a hollowed view onto Andrew.

Neil stayed quiet and still at the man’s approach.

“Andrew,” The man started. “You won’t know me, but I’ve been kicked out of my parents home. I have nowhere else to go. I’m Nicholas Hemmick, your cousin. Will you let me stay?”

i hope u like the way i included nicky. wouldn’t be a proper au without the babe.

that’s all from me! hope u liked it

[that-one-smartass]

The Creation of the Andrew Minyard Defense Squad

An idea that started with @apprenticedmagician listening to my ramblings.  And turned into my contribution to Twinyard Appreciation Week.

Aaron is irritated. It’s not like this is a rare state for him to be in.  He’d spent much of his life irritated.  And the source isn’t new either.  But spending an extended amount of time with his brother’s fuck buddy is a new kind of torture.  Baring the one short conversation at the cabin last spring, Aaron and Josten had made a point of avoiding each other.  Until now.  Because of course Josten just had to mouth off to the press about the Ravens.  AGAIN.  And of course the cult that makes up Ravens fans had to start sending death threats. So of course the Foxes must protect sweet, baby, gonna-get-all-of-them-killed Neil.

Aaron had been content to leave the matter alone.  Either Josten’s smart mouth finally got him killed, or he would come back from the dead again with more scars.  But Andrew had asked Aaron to escort Josten around campus when Andrew couldn’t.  And Andrew—he had never asked for anything.  It irked Aaron that of course when he did, it was about precious Neil.  But Aaron found he couldn’t turn his brother away when faced with a genuine request—even if it had been in the usual monotone.

So here he is. Escorting the idiot to his Spanish class across campus.  To an outsider, it would look like two strangers just happened to walk side-by-side on the thin sidewalk.  Content to ignore Josten and be ignored in return, Aaron starts to pull out his phone to see if Katelyn’s out of class yet.  

A shout of “WESNINSKI” stops him.  His head snaps to the right where a group of football players stand in a huddle.  The ring-leader in the middle of the group grins over at Josten.  It is not friendly.  Aaron looks to Josten as well and notices that he hasn’t stopped.  Quickening his pace just a bit to catch up, Aaron keeps the football players in his peripherals just in case.

“HEY WESNINSKI I’M TALKING TO YOU,” rings across the grass as the group starts towards them.  Aaron can see Josten’s knuckles clench around his book bag strap and his jaw clench, but otherwise he gives no reaction.  “Hey Butcher, I was just wondering if you know that Serial Killer 101 is that way,” the asshole says when he gets closer, his friends snickering behind him.  Josten just keeps walking so Aaron follows suit.  When a hand reaches out to Josten, Aaron expects a reaction similar to Andrew’s. Maybe a pulled knife or a punch. What he doesn’t expect is for Josten to neatly side step the grab causing the football player to trip.  He also expects that fucking mouth to get them is more trouble.  What he doesn’t expect is Josten to continue walking to the course of disgruntled shouts behind him.  

“Since when do you ignore that kind of shit?”  Aaron feels compelled to ask as they leave the group behind.

Josten rolls his eyes, “That’s hardly the worst I’ve heard in the last year.  If I stopped for every person that said shit like that to me, I’d never make it to class.  Or practice. Or a game.”

Aaron studies his face intently, wondering if Andrew knew what his fuck buddy apparently deals with. He almost asks, but at that moment they reach the Language Arts building and Josten disappears inside with a small nod back.

So he can control his mouth.  Why the fuck can’t he keep it shut any other time.

Now that Aaron is tuned to it, he hears the jeers directed Josten’s way constantly.  Josten doesn’t seem to care.  Why Aaron cares is because Andrew does.  Any time his brother is in the vicinity when the calls of ‘Wesninski’ and ‘Butcher’ follow Josten, Andrew steps up to whoever just took their life into their hands. Andrew who doesn’t care about anything puts himself in danger for some broken, impulsive, lying thing.  Aaron hates it.

Aaron gets it—gets Josten—months after that first incident.  They’re playing Breckenridge in the death matches. The game started ugly and it’s only continued to escalate.  It’s the fourth quarter, Aaron is dripping sweat under his armor, his brother is at his back, and Breckenridge is making one final try for the goal before they’re out of the championships.  Aaron steps up to the brute barreling towards him but is met with a wall of six-five muscle that he can’t break.  He watches from the ground in horror as that same wall crashes into his brother.

Aaron sees red as soon as Andrew crumples to the ground in his goal.  The buzz of the goal barely registers as he staggers to his feet, intent on making the offending striker pay.  Before he can get more than two steps, a blur of orange passes in front of him. The Breckenridge striker hunches over before Aaron can register that Josten just dealt the stricker a fierce blow to the abdomen.  He rears back for another punch when a small “Neil” comes from the goal.  Josten immediately drops his fist, pushes the striker to the ground to get him out of the way, and hurries over the Andrew’s slowly moving form.

Aaron breaks from his stupor to continue towards the two.  Josten barely spares him a glance as he hovers over Andrew.  Aaron locks eyes with his brother as he gets to his feet. “Alright?” comes the breathless rasp.

“Yeah,” Aaron answers automatically.  Whistles are blowing as red cards are handed out to the striker and Josten.  Not that Josten is paying attention.  His eyes are scouring over Andrew in search of injury.

“Idiot, go away,” Andrew scoffs, shoving at Josten.

He stays for another minute as if making absolutely sure that Andrew is fine before he shrugs. “Worth it,” he says as he begins to walk off the court.  To Aaron he says, “Don’t let them do that again,” as he passes.

“Obviously.”

They win the game.

Later, at Eden’s, the whole team is drinking to celebrate the advancement to championships.  Aaron and Neil drew short straws to get the next round.  They’re waiting for Roland to fill up two trays when the loud ramblings of some drunk reaches them.  “…and he’s a psychotic little shit.  That one. The blond over there.  Offered to buy him a drink once and the psycho pulled a fucking knife.  Still think he just needs-”

Aaron turns and plants a fist in the asshole’s stomach.  The dick crumples with the hit as Aaron straightens, “That’s my brother you shit for brains,” he says with a snarl.

“And someone like you doesn’t deserve to be in the same club as him, much less buy him a drink,” Josten drawls from Aaron’s left.  His eyes blaze with the same fury that often gets him death threats.  They turn back to the bar as one to grab the trays and make their way back to the table.  They throw back a shot simultaneously and take a seat.

“The fuck was that?” Andrew asks watching them both closely.  “Hate spending time with each other that much?”

Josten rolls his eyes and settles back in his seat.  Aaron stands to head to the dance floor, but as he does Josten looks over.  They share a single nod.

Aaron and Josten talk now, but it is only ever about Andrew and only ever in passing.  It’s a relay of information.  

“Heard that striker say to aim for Andrew’s ankles.”  A stretcher is called onto the court soon after for Belmont’s striker.

“That asshole two tables over was talking shit about the trial.”  A deliberate hip to a table later and the asshole no longer has a working laptop.

Small exchanges back and forth with increasing frequency.

”The fuck is going on with you and Neil?” Andrew asks as soon as Aaron stumbles into the kitchen in search for coffee after a night at Eden’s.

“Fuck are you talking about?” he mumbles while rummaging through the cabinet for a mug.

“The two of you were whispering like a bunch of school girls last night,” comes the bland response.

Coffee finally in hand, Aaron turns to face his brother.  The memory of some dicks talking shit about Andrew comes with the first sip of coffee.  The memory of orchestrating their very full drink tray tipping to the floor with Neil comes with the second sip.  A shrug is all he gives in response.  The usual bland look sharpening into a glare tells him that Andrew knows exactly what happened.

“Thinking to protect or defend me is a useless delusion.  I’m not sure which of you infected the other, but the stupidity ends now,” he states in that way that says he expects to be obeyed.

“We disagree.”

An eyebrow quirks up, “Oh, it’s we now, is it?”

“We.”

A stare down.  Then, unbelievably, a scoff.  A concession.  “You’re both idiots.”  A small quirk of lips.  It takes Aaron a moment to recognize it as a small smile.  The first he’s gotten from his brother since the drugs.  Since Drake.  Since he finally became the protector.

Worth it.