#the vent is your only option
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Mouthwashing Saw au but no one is actually punishing them Pony Express is just that incompetent and the Tulpar that poorly maintained that entering a room and trying to get out without injury just feels like a saw trap.
#nurse Anya to your left in the door handle and to your right is a door handle neither work and#the emergency call button is just a push light switch that was tapped to the wall#the vent is your only option#and then she kills herself cause wtf#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#yeah I’m feeling stupid#thinking about the two drafts on asks I have to answer my fic but most importantly the P.E Au she’s silly#I like when characters experience the horrors
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
I've rambled about this game before in tags and while I have a lot of complex thoughts on Curly as a character and what he should have done and how fandom responses and discussions have had good and bad takes (and it's all complicated and has layers which is a core point of the game!) one take I've never seen explicitly said for "Curly should have xyz" which I'm surprised to not see is "Curly should have asked Anya what she wanted". We don't know how much he would have listened or if her plan would make sense, but I think it says a lot about how the game's POVs (and some of the fandom) show Anya with little agency and someone who things happen to not someone who does things, and the men on board as the ones who make decisions and decide the course of the narrative for better or worse. I've seen people saying Anya should have been able to get angry and kill Jimmy, and people saying not all victims want violence and it's okay if she just wants to escape and move on. There's also arguments saying Curly should have reported Jimmy, shot him, put him in cryostasis, etc. and arguments saying Curly wasn't being malicious and that he was worried about things like their pay being docked, being locked with that conflict for months, not understanding the situation, etc. And it is complicated! But part of that male-centric view the game critiques (and fandom is against but accidentally perpetuates at times) is saying that it should have been Curly's choice at all. We don't know if Anya would have wanted to have shift scheduling and where she stayed and who spoke to Jimmy changed so he's kept away from her and to leave it at that. We don't know if she would have wanted to report him directly to the company's HR. We only see her when she's at her breaking point and even then her goal is to defend herself and prevent Jimmy from harming anyone. Anything past that is speculation. Obviously certain plans like a murder suicide or something like that would make sense for Curly to be against, but he never bothered to check. He said he would do anything, but didn't ask what that "anything" should be. Not all victims are the same, and not everybody has the same priorities. Part of getting rid of that male-centric toxic rape culture is letting women and victims have their own voices and decide their own paths, and framing the ideal situation as "the man in charge should have decided to protect the woman in xyz way because that's what she needed" instead of "the man in charge should have asked the woman what she needed and protected her that way" is still ultimately one man having control of everything. And we know from the game that doesn't work, even if he's a "good man that means well" and thinks he's inferring what's best. The only way to make sure victims get the support they need is to ask
#mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#i have a lot more complex thoughts but i'm a bit sad i haven't seen this take at all#and this also applies to real life! people know what their abuser is like better than you do#if you know somebody in a dangerous situation#talk to them!#maybe you think beating the abuser up or directly confronting them is the best option#and maybe it is but maybe that will only make them take out all that stress on your friend#some people want retaliation some want assistance some just want to vent#the first step to doing the best thing you can do for victims is to ask them what they want
84 notes
·
View notes
Text
When you bear the pain of living you are called a warrior, a fighter, they say you are so brave, but when you can no longer fight you’re a coward who took the easy way out, have they ever thought that it might’ve been the only way out, that you could no longer fight, bc for every battle you won there were 10 more to fight,
#tw sui ideation#tw sui implied#tw sui attempt#tw self destructive thoughts#mentally drained#sorry for being depressing#i hate me so much#tw breakdown#anxitey#depressing shit#tw depressing thoughts#tw depressing stuff#tw self destruction#tw disordered thoughts#you’re losing me#mental problems#mental health#might kms#you’re on your own kid#it’s the only way#no other options#maybe it’s over#tw sui talk#tw sui vent#tw sucidal ideation#let me disappear#i want to cvt#stuck in my head#i can’t be helped#is this it
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
introducing the unwilling captain of the Dynamos, former Inspector Second Class Lyfrassir Edda!
The AU where lyfrassir tries to hunt the prison mechs down with their shiny new eldritch powers (and a gun) for ditching them while their system was vored by a crusty imperialist’s eldritch sugar mommy.
Unfortunately, they’re not the only survivor of a Near Mechs Encounter interested in finding the crew of the starship Aurora— not by a long shot.
#lyfrassir#lyfrassir edda#the bifrost incident#the mechanisms#tbi#hey. you. yes you the one reading these tags. it’s me the ps5 inside your brain. come into my ask box and type#‘jester speaketh on the subject of new midgardian hair cartilage.’ i have so many thoughts about midgardian biology and how it interacted#with the bifrost#i also have a full crew roster for the dynamos au#and also to pique your interest further: the reason the crew finds dr. plichard is because lyfrassir starts displaying anemia symptoms#after they sleep with no discernible cause so they put cameras in Lyfs room and find dr. plichard dropping from the ceiling and doing#freestyle blooddrawing before spidering back up into the vents. this is how they discover daedalus is NOT doing his job as engineer because#dr. plichard has set up an entire condo in the vents. daedalus promised that he was done trying to stage a violent mutiny against lyf to#claim the title of captain. clearly he did not pinky promise because that bitch is a LIAR.#anyways. lyfs only captain because 1) no one else wanted the position and 2) no one wanted Former Tyrant Daedalus Of The Hephaestus Fame to#be in power#so unfortunately their options were ‘ex cop frothing at the mouth for immortal blood’ or ‘Hephaestus the Olympian’#anyways. if you’re wondering why the ps5 inside your brain came preloaded with mechanism au opinions and a tumblr blog.#well.#Don’t worry about it :)#come into my ask box. we’ll have pirate fun times in space!#also let me know what you think of this piece. i need to have positive affirmations read out to me by the tiktok voice over lady as asmr.#for my health#anyways oh yeah forgot that one tag#my art
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
So that IGN interview with the BG3 team somehow soured my perceptions on writers and designers even more than they already were. Incredible, lol.
#how about stop including evil options in your games as some sort of moral gotcha to your players how about you respect them more than that#you're telling me minthara only has the semi conscience that she does to make players feel even worse about what they did to get her??????#if you're going to have evil options then do it with the same care and attention as good/default ones or just dont do it at all#bg3 vent#idk what to tag this as otherwise because the rabid fanbase might find me and attack me otherwise 🙃
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
Me: Oh boy! I can't wait to roleplay on this blog I have spent so much time setting up! All the thought and care that went into-
Tumblr: Bitch you thought! Get deleted motherfucker!
Me: WHAT?! Why?
Tumblr: Spam :)
Me: What about it said to you it was spam?! Ok ok, fine, I've sent a repeal, now give me my blog back.
Tumblr: ...
Me: Tumblr it's been two days where the fuck is my blog?
#tw vent#tw rant#(( Tumblr I hate you so much right now ))#(( This is the THIRD time this has happened! ))#(( I sent DAYS working on the damn thing. All for it to just be thrown down the gutter because of Tumblr's shitty spam filtering ))#(( Hey Tumblr. How about you use the filter for the ACTUAL bots on your site?! ))#(( I've sent tickets. Multiple actually. And I've gotten NOTHING back aside from the automated “we got your ticket” email. ))#(( Yes I understand that the people working on this stuff are people and they can't get to everything all at once ))#(( But Tumblr...How about you hire more people to help with it? ))#(( Or better yet...FIX YOUR SHITTY SPAM FILTER! ))#(( With how many times I and MANY others have had this shit done to us. There's no way in fucking hell Tumblr doesn't know about it ))#(( If your spam filter stopped targeting innocent blogs. Maybe your support wouldn't be so plugged up. ))#(( Now the only thing I can do is sit and wait for Tumblr staff to eventually fix the problem ))#(( How long is that gonna take Tumblr? Three days? A week? Two weeks?! ))#(( Or how about you start making a option on the support be ���My blog was terminated out of nowhere”? ))#(( Just UGH! Fuck you Tumblr! ))
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
back in my suicidally depressed era 😍
#shut up miiiwu/#having a menty b 🤪#i fucking hate job hunting i never want to work food service again but the only places that actually fucking hire ppl here are fast food#yknow. the type of job that makes me want to perform fucking vivisectionom myself#and they don’t even fucking pay enough hourly for it to be worth the horse shit. im not working for 11 dollars a fucking hour are you out of#your fucking mind??? go to hell#i need 15/hr MINIMUM to live in this fuckass city and even then only if i get enough hours#what if i just kill myself and pray to be reborn in a real country with actual walkable cities that isn’t a fucking cultural dead zone#suburban shit hole or a poorly planned concrete shit heap city with impossible rent prices dog shit infrastructure parading as a real city#the only decent job option here is the kroger nearby and i’ve applied to every fuckign listing but keep getting turned down.#fuck you. hire me. i need a real job im going to rip out my fuckign stomach i hate it here#hate. let me tell you how much ive come to hate you since i began to live.#i fuckign hate car centric infrastructure#we need to line up all the people responsible for this shit and shoot them firing squad style for their crimes and im not fucking kidding#i hate it here i hate it here i hate it here#ignore this#vent post#suicide mention#i guess idk#negativity#i genuinely don’t know if i can pay my chunk of rent this month.
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Noooo I hate y'all who made those wolf cut edits
ALL THE GUYS with this teenager TikTok hair made my ovaries dry and implode ☠️
#zayne bb youre almost 30 what they did to you...😭#please I want the option to delete it forever#the memories are cool but this hair man...#and even the outfits please 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 THATS HORRIBLE#love and deepspace#vent#If it were memories only i would have no problem#still ugly but i can ignore#But now I'll have to deal with it forever with my hubbies wearing it ughhhhhh#im truly in pain#EDIT: It is separate of the outfit thank goodness 🙏🙏🙏 Caleb and Zayne don't worry this abomination will never touch your beautiful heads#me talking
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
wanted to go to the gym social tn but as I was getting my stuff together to go out, a friend said smth that rly pissed me off and now I'm too fucking angry to go out. fucks sake man
#fucking hate ppl commenting on my 'self control' for being sober bc I get it all the fucking time and its so patronising !!!!!!#even if its not intended that way. dont care didnt fucking ask. especially from someone im friends with#but whatever i should know better than to expect ppl to know me#maybe other ppl need discipline to stay sober but i dont bc the alternative is a non option and always has been. not that hard for me#and i have my own self control struggles w other shit man like im not pristine and perfect fuck off. you only dont know abt the#shit i actually fucking struggle with bc i dont know or trust u well enough for that.#and i HATE when ppl fucking imply im susceptible to peer pressure. im not. dont fucking overestimate your influence#ppl act like shit is a choice like actually i have a trauma rooted fear that comes from ppl in my family dying of substance abuse thanks 👍#which i dont expect strangers to know. but my friends should fucking know that!!! but i guess its not worth remembering#whatever it doesnt matter im prolly upset for other reasons im going to go out for a walk to calm down i cant be at home right now#even more fucking annoyed that im missing the gym over this. i shouldve been there an hour ago.#i mean i could still go maybe the cycle ride would stop me feeling mad and blowing everyone up once im there. i doubt it tho#UGH. fucking whatever. whatever whatever whatever. sorry for ventposting i was typing out a longass reply#but its not gonna fucking do anything except come across needlessly aggressive and ruin the conversation#even if i really really want to be needlessly aggressive. and ruin the conversation. but i guess i have the self control to not. lmfao#what if i just killed myself. anyway i think im gonna go get some shitty fast food on this walk and watch a horror movie when im back#.vent
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Late night magenta.
#im not going back to facebook#im not going back to twitter#or instagram#any of those#i realized not everyone is entitled to me and i to them#why force connections#why force people to be roots of your tree when they were supposed to be leaves that come and go with the seasons#not to mention why care about where i went off to where i had gone when i gave advance notice im out#is it out of sincerity cause you genuinely thought i vanished from the face of the earth#or is it you got bored with everyone else around you and saw me as a spare at the back of the shelf#or the secret third option you needed someone to talk to cause evidently im a damn good therapist and you don't have to pay me therapy money#im very careful who i give my energy to#if we pop into each others spheres lets not waste it even if its for a short amount of time#like you i can't be everyones root or branch or leaf for their tree#but i can always be the wind#all around and you might think of me often but im not here im somewhere else#dont mean for all the cryptic metaphors#im just frustrated so many people that ignored me when i was homeless and struggling finally want to see how I've been#when i put it out there i needed help#only to get told i “wasnt loud enough”#i don't hold resentment toward them or anger#if anything it makes me sad for them#cause they can't enjoy the person i am now#not unless i choose it#magenta is my vent word
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
i wonder how you get a license to kill
#achilles rambles#guys why does my mom suck so fucking bad#'apparently your only options are the gas station at the bottom of the hill or youre disabled since birth' i told you ONE TIME that i might#qualify for disability benefits because of my excruciating back pain flare ups and that was AFTER i suggested i apply at the gas station#because you kept talking about how fucking strapped for cash we were and i felt like you were trying to pressure me into work#'oh well i haf a job by your age and i was moved out of my mothers house becausei couldnt stand her' HOW DO YOU FUCKING THINK I FEELLLLLL#THATS WHY I SUGGESTED I APPLY AT THE GAS STATION. I DONT HAVE ANY OTHER OPTIONS. I CANT DRIVE AND WE ONLY HAVE ONE FUCKING CAR ANYWAYS#achilles vents#that one feels more accurate i guess#god. i need OUTTTTTT
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
let me preface this by clarifying i am not anti therapy in any way whatsoever and in fact encourage people to get therapy if they can and even go the extra step to help friends find the right type of therapy that may help them
ok now that that's out of the way.
therapy is bullshit man you go to a therapist saying "hey. i wanna kill myself. can you help me stop wanting to kill myself somehow?" and they go "sure! first step, stop wanting to kill yourself" and you say "well i can't. that's why i came to you. bc i don't know. how to stop wanting to kill myself" and they'll say "that's a shame. i can't help you if you want to kill yourself. that'll be 125$ please"
#mad abt my old therapist again#even checked the cost of sessions in usd to make this accessible. came out to be 124$ and a bit. and i did that on a weekly basis for YEARS#and i'm extra mad bc trying to find a new therapist is already hard esp with bpd where your options are very limited as is#but when they ask abt my history with therapy and they ask why i stopped seeing him after years. what am i supposed to say#so that scares them off and they say they can't help me or they're like. scared to go deep with me ig. bc idk. they're scared I'll snap?#what am i supposed to do. hospitalizing myself isn't an option obvs. what is there left.#it feels like a cycle#like. 'i can't help you if you don't want to help yourself'. but i need help even figuring out how to want that#and it's not like ppl in my life know how to help. tbh they usually make it worse. so loved ones aren't an option and professionals aren't -#- an option. so what is there left. how am i supposed to do a thing that comes naturally to others but not to me#even with medication even being in a recovery program i want to kms more than i used to for years#I'm supposedly taking the right steps. but. to get metaphorical ig. the road is crumbling and there's nowhere to go#and that only makes me spiral more. despite taking the right steps i feel like i'm only getting worse. there's no hope for me. lol#vent#suicide //#negative //#ask to tag#i need a good cry like full-on sobbing and screaming but unfortunately. i became too emotionally constipated for that
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
A hard pill for me to swallow lately has been that, despite everything, I'm probably the best version of myself that could've existed. And that's not really a comforting thought.
#it's a special kind of doomed imo.#every other path most likely led to something worse#maybe it's pessimistic to think of it that way. maybe I should be more grateful that it isn't worse#but it's hard to find that within me atm#the best of bad outcomes doesn't mean good. it doesn't mean I'm happy.#it just means every other option would have been more miserable. and it's disheartening to think like that ofc#and I know the logic is flawed. but I know myself and even with the advantages I have I'm unable to make anything of myself#had I chosen differently it would only be worse. I'd still be impoverished. I'd still be depressed.#I might just also be stuck in a cult and married w kids in the middle of fucking nowhere wisconsin on top of it all#<- that's the worst case scenario. probably. really hard to say#biggest bullet I've dodged yet tho. completely unintentionally too.#another hard pill to swallow: sometimes the things we want the most WILL ruin your life and it's a blessing when it falls through#unfortunately you don't get to know this until years later#as you watch your ex best friend marry a man almost 2x her age and birth kids she never wanted into this world#and then you're like OHHHH that would've been my fate... I get it now 😐#still. there's no relief in the realization because while you would've been miserable w a shitty husband and 3 or 4 kids#you are in fact still miserable without them. but oh well.#I would say 'anyways. I just need to go to the beach.' but honestly. I haven't felt the desire to do anything at all lately.#we're past the point of letting the sand and waves heal me. we're almost past the point of needlessly venting online!#there's so much I usually would vent about here but I have hardly had the urge to do so.#I'm just tired. life has drained me dry. my heart aches constantly and I barely know why
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#sry I need to vent more abt my tattoo pain bc I physically cannot do anything productive rn im completely and totally incapacitated#can’t read anything beyond short posts or texts. can’t eat or move at all#tried to sleep through it so it would at least Be Tomorrow so I can get medical help. but the jolts of pain make me like Jump#hence me being sent home from work early today like it’s not even that I was complaining I was just flinching involuntarily so much#and was unable to work or function at all. thank god I don’t work retail rn I remember the pain of tattoo infections in that context#it’s so Abrupt it feels like I’m being stabbed or repeatedly bitten#literally trying not to scream bc I have a roommate. but he almost certainly hears me crying and saying ouch#which sucks bc I barely know the guy lol he has no context. At least on my drive home I could scream as much as I needed#literally would go to the ER if I could afford it and that sounds so dramatic bc it is#it doesn’t feel like it can wait. genuinely don’t know how I’m gonna get through the night#I haven’t slept in like 60 hours and I doubt I will tonight. but it hurts too much to even tell if I’m tired#and I don’t have time for this!! I have so much I need to be doing. I hate that the only way I can have Time is to be Extra Disabled#in a way that leaves me completely unable to do the things I normally can fight through despite burnout#and I was just at health services yesterday asking them to do insurance paperwork that they couldn’t do#it’s embarrassing having to be like hey I was just there but can I come back#I have Another tattoo infection but I pinky promise I take such good care of them#and my artist is like the best of the best too. it’s like it doesn’t matter what either of us does to keep me safe#and I know if anyone responds to this it will be to tell me to stop getting tattoos#but that’s literally like telling me not to get top surgery if I’m immunocompromised n might have recovery complications#both are equally important gender affirming medical procedures to me I’m not joking#and I hate always having to justify this whilst in agonizing pain. I hate answering the same things every time bc still no one believes me#I say this as someone who lives every moment in baseline pain that would have your average person writhing on the floor and I ignore it#this is truly unbearable if I hadn’t been through it a million times I would think it was life threatening#just needed to get it out ig. bc it’s all I can physically do. until health services opens in 12 hours#PLEASE let them have availability tomorrow bc i have literally no option on weekends#this is just. so upsetting and embarrassing. I don’t have time or emotional capacity for this#personal#mine#vent post
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
so we use these little packs of disposable travel toothbrushes that we can keep next to our bed and don't have to rinse after using them or anything because between executive dysfunction, sensory issues, and fatigue, this is basically the only way we can keep up with brushing our teeth regularly.
anyway, I realised we'd almost ran out and went to buy more and they suddenly aren't available anywhere. we'd get a pack of 24 for relatively cheap and now all I can seem to find are packs of 1 or 2 "travel toothbrushes" that are basically just normal toothbrushes for the same price as a pack of the ones we normally get. the brand that made them has nothing about them on its website besides a pack of 2 toothbrushes listed under the same name that aren't the same product.
so anyway now I need to figure out an alternative for the sake of actually being able to manage our dental hygiene because the one thing that was letting us do that somewhat adequately isn't available anymore
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#vent post#we've found a couple of places selling them but they're places that don't ship to the UK#and it would be way too expensive to use a proxy service for them#also we do have a normal toothbrush but we pretty much never use it because having to get up and stand at the sink is hell#and sometimes isn't an option at all certain symptoms flare up too badly#and that whole ''keep a cup of water next to your bed to rinse it in'' thing doesn't work well with our contamination OCD#also on a related note I'm trying to buy energy drinks (the things we're reliant on for managing our ADHD at this point)#and the delivery options are like... we can get them on the 11th-13th for £4.99 or on the 8th for £22.99 which feels ridiculous#but we only have 8 left so I guess I'm going with the cheaper option and I'm just gonna have to not have caffiene for maybe a few days#and hope we don't completely lose track of everything given how bad our ADHD has been even with caffeine lately#the bad ADHD is the reason I didn't get round to ordering more of them earlier in the first place. ugh#I hate trying to work around so many different medical issues that all make it so fucking hard to do basic shit
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
'nother big post of closed species guys i've designed since folks were nice abt the last one :)
mignyans (alien parasite crabs that infect a host and cause the thing-esque meat to manifest on their bodies):
^ free anniversary event design! they do a scavenger hunt every october for traits and it's always a good time
^design i did as a guest artist for the species! using the new mineral deposit trait that was added after the last anniversary event
^ this is one of my favorites i've ever done. i love you channel wvmb you will always be famous to me.
^ this one and the next one were designed based on premade crabs! this one's the same species as the first mignyan i ever designed
^ this one goes with the sun & moon one :) wizard & apprentice
^metalhead!! bloody remnants logo designed by my wonderful fiance
starlyngs (avian creatures that are personified stars i think? i'll be honest i'm less clear on the lore i just think they're neat):
^ shithead extraordinaire who is in trouble all the time for stealing & conning people out of valuables
^ freak.
#ibis art#i forgor what i tagged the last one of these i did#but if anyone wants to see all the beasts i've designed they're up on my toyhou.se same username as here#p much the only stuff on tumblr i've ever seen abt closed species is drama/vent blogs and i want to stay faaaar away from that#so i don't post much about these here but i like them a lot and they are fun to make#they feel like good creative exercises! ive seen a lot of people complain abt cs being too restrictive#and i've definitely had that experience in SOME cs... there's a few i abandoned bc design stuff was too strict#but you can find a lot of spaces that are much freer with design guidelines and working with those rules is really fun for me#i'd say rule of thumb is never join a species if they don't offer a free way to make your own and only make yr first one on a free myo#that way you don't lose money if anything Sucks and can hit the bricks no problem#i like to buy slots for mignyans bc i like making a lot & it supports my friend on the mod team#but i seriously sideeye any species without a free myo option or that puts time limits on free myos from events & the like#and anyway you can just make whatever you want forever and you don't have to make it part of a species. that's also always an option#ok tag ramble DONE ibis AWAYYYY
6 notes
·
View notes