#the tl;dr is that my girl deserved better )

[sylleblosscm]

Luna’s relationship to her own self-image is complicated and oft fraught. She has lived in public all her life, with scores of people awaiting her every milestone - and present to critique her every mistake. As Princess and Oracle-to-be, Luna was raised with incredibly strict standards. Whatever lenience she was shown easily outweighed by her teachers, trainers, and later on the Empire themselves. 

 As children, we all craft our self-image from the things we are told about ourselves. Luna knew all her life that she did not “belong” to herself; rather, she existed to serve a greater purpose. Whether it was to her people, her public, or the Gods, she was to remain presentable and accountable for every decision she made. In DotF, it is mentioned how Lunafreya does not have much of an inclination toward fashion, not out of a lack of interest, but simply because she crafts her image to please others and not herself. She dresses as she is expected to be perceived - clean, chaste, and inoffensive. The idea of seeming unkempt makes her deeply uncomfortable, and she is easily embarrassed by the smallest misstep. Furthermore, without her title to cling to, she genuinely struggles to befriend Sol as she was never taught to interact with people as anything other than their Oracle. 

 Luna began her training proper at the age of 16, however it can be gleaned that she was preparing for her role well before then. Some of her training, she genuinely enjoyed - namely music and dance. Some of it she found rewarding, such as athleticism. But some of it was horrible. Forced into isolation for days at a time, made to fast - all under the guise of making her stronger, more durable for the task ahead of her. The idea of training somebody by pushing them to the limits of their endurance is all over media, yet rarely does such a thing work in real life. Often such cruel treatment serves to sew contempt within people. 

 But remember, this is what she was born for. This duty is ordained by the Gods themselves. If it becomes more than she can deal with, that is a fault in her, not in them. Complaining, setting boundaries, advocating for herself - these things are actively discouraged.

 The deprivation of food as a sign of “strength” is also incredibly dangerous, especially for a young woman who feels pressured to be pretty all the time. It is not hard to imagine an older version of Luna who struggles to finish meals and considers eating too much or gaining weight a moral failing on her own part. Eating for pleasure - even foods she enjoys - would become a minefield of triggers that can take years to disarm. 

 As she was taught to place others ahead of herself, this also leads to a subclinical inability for Luna to read her own needs and desires. This is also hinted at in DoTF where Luna struggles to define herself beyond her duty, or identify her own dreams and passions. Indeed it seems she has next to none, outside of being with Noctis. It is even explicitly stated to be a result of her upbringing - she is not encouraged to ruminate on her own needs, or seek her own happiness. Only when the world is free and at peace may she consider such things. And since there’s really no such thing as a perfect world, well…

 None of this takes away from Luna’s natural compassion or empathy. Rather, I’d argue that it has been weaponized against her in order to keep her compliant; that those above her could ask her to give anything, even her life, and she would do so willingly. It is not until others are threatened that she dares intervene. When she is asked about her own desires, Luna not only cannot name anything, she is actively confused and upset by the question. Likewise when she is asked about being compensated for her efforts. 

 At a certain point in the game itself, she mentions having nothing to offer Noctis, save for the voice afforded to the Oracle. Luna thinks so little about herself, that she really seems to think little of herself. All her life she has been hailed as a saviour, desired for her status, that in her heart of hearts she really, truly believes she is, to borrow a phrase, worthless if she can’t be of service. Without her title to protect her, she would probably be taken advantage of by bad actors left and right. 

 Even as her duty is complete and she is given the chance to grow out of this mindset, I don’t believe it will be easy to shed; in fact, she may never fully move on from it. Though she doesn’t have the vocabulary to articulate what she’s experiencing, or the damage that’s been done to her psyche, Luna is fortunate to have people in her life who love her for who she is, and will try to uplift her where they can. Here’s hoping one day that boundless compassion can extend to herself for once.

[erebus0dora]

ok so i promised you a rant on Eric Bogosian, and i pinky promise i'll try to keep the story short (those beautiful people i've already privately spewed my fascination at deserve peace and love 💜)

TL;DR: Eric Bogosian is a good researcher and judge of human nature, which honestly shouldn't be surprising given his experience, links below

it is easy to google Eric (i'll call him that not out of disrespect, it's just shorter) and get to a conclusion he's just a slightly awkward old man who had extremely weird youth and gives off a powerful bi vibe just for shits and giggles; which is fair, given the wild way he handles most interviews

but hear me out, i'm not an expert, i'm just a book kind of girl. so i sought out the books, and into the books i looked.

back in 1988 he was nominated for Pulitzer's for his "Talk Radio", and i count that as one of the first cases of him using a real story to weave a (semi)fictional one. it is a powerful play, and a gut-punching movie, but I am mentioning it not because of its ehhh artistic value. in my book, it's a proof of the way he tends to critically re-imagine the things he sees and analyses.

keep that in mind when you google his "Operation 'Nemesis".

he initially started looking into the history of Armenian genocide as into the material worth developing into a plot for a movie. but, in his own words, and i quote, "I wrote this book because I had no choice. The Nemesis story required more attention than a simple screenplay."

he is still not a scientist, mind that - and his book reads as a work of fiction. say, there's no way one can look into the head of a deceased person and know their feelings, but one can guess; and Eric guesses, of course. but the fun part is that he makes educated guesses. nearly for each presumption there's a source. a footnote. a quote.

what really strikes me is that he looked into ONE plot line and fished out a complex slice of history, dripping with CONTEXT. White Russian emigration? it's in there. early stages of oil industry? check. the colourful background of Europe in early XX century? all there.

there's no wonder he spent seven years on this book.

i repeat: SEVEN. YEARS.

call me sapiosexual, but that was the moment when i stopped and thought: ok, THIS IS HOT.

what also impresses me is the way he speaks of his past. he admits he's done wild shit, and adds that the best part was the moment he understood he didn't need to be high to be creative. it's the underlying power of "yeah, been there, got better, SO CAN YOU" that gets me.

to keep things short, i'm adding links:

here's a vid where he speaks of the book on Armenian genocide (i had personal reasons to tear up a bit while listening, ngl)

and here's a vid where he speaks of acting, writing, and improv, that basically broke my art block, for which i am going to be grateful for fucking ever, i guess

(if you got to this point of my rant, you deserve a hug and a respectful kiss on the mouth if you're ok with that. go have a lovely day 💜)

[alpaca-clouds]

I still very much like the idea of redeeming Gortash. For one, yes, because I am projecting onto this man too much (on the basis of being autistic and having abusive parents - and no, you will never convince me that Gortash isn't autistic). But also, as I wrote about before: Narratively it is just so much more interesting to redeem him than to kill him.

I wrote a longer blog about that before, which I cannot find because tumblr search is still useless. But tl;dr: Right now the only thing Karlach gets to do in Act 3 for her companion quest is basically to kill Gortash, which you still gotta do no matter whether you have Karlach as a companion or not. You get two more scenes if you have Karlach along, sure, but it does not do anything - nor does it give her story anything interesting. Which kinda overlooks one big thing about Karlach and her Engine: Gortash should know how to fix it. Because he made those Infernal Engines work in the Steel Watch. So, to give Karlach that important story decision that literally any other character has: Make her decide whether she cares more about her revenge - or about wanting to live. Let Gortash live if he fixes her engine.

It would have been so much more satisfying for her story. (I just hate how they dropped the ball on Karlach in Act 3. I hate it so much. My girl deserved so much better!)

However, yes. I also simply am a massive sucker for good redemption stories. Especially as those are rare. (Mostly, because media tends to go with "character does one big good thing, now everyone forgives them and they are redeemed" all the time.) And I... yeah, I am just kinda obsessed with the idea of redeeming Gortash.

Now, I am already writing Kindness Begets Kindness, which is basically just Astarion gay-bitching at Gortash until Gortash realizes that maybe he actually wants to redeem himself. But it ends with that. With Gortash getting to the point that maybe he wants forgiveness.

And it got me thinking about how Gortash could even go about it. Because, you know. Killing hundreds, if not thousands, and enslaving at least hundreds as well... It is hard to come back from, right?

So, here I was talking to a friend of mine.

Me: "Really, the thing that Gortash needs is an autistic nerd as a friend, you know?"

Him: "Well, then write one up."

Me: "Or Barcus."

Him: "Who?"

Me: "Or, he is this gnome, who to me reads also as super autistic."

Him: "Well, there you have your answer."

Me: "... Or I could ship them."

So, I guess I have officially come up with the most insane crack ship for Gortash yet. This is even more crack than my Aurelia/Araj ship, I guess.

But...

I am kinda tempted to write it. Darn it.

[artiepoison]

Drew Tanaka was done dirty imo.

When I was reading the lost hero, I expected her to get some sort of redemption ark, because she was such a stereotypical mean girl.

Like she should have had an ark of some sort, but no. She was just there to,

A. Be mean to Piper

B. Flirt with Jason

and C. Replace Selena.

She barely even shows up for the rest of the series! And she's not even mentioned in PJO? If not redeem her, then keep her as an antagonist in the series? She also would have been interesting as a side antagonist, so there was conflict happening during the CHB scenes.

Also, give the girl a backstory! Maybe she feels pressured by the responsibility of replacing selena, maybe she feels like she has to live up to her mother, maybe she was just brought up in a way that made her think it was okay to be a bully. Just something pleaseee.

I really wanted Piper and Drew to become friends, so that Piper could stop her cringy "not like other girls" thing, and Drew would become a nicer person. (Also there needs to be more female friendships in the riordanverse!)

AND! Just because she likes makeup and cares how she looks does not automatically make her a bad person! I'm tired of the popular pretty mean girl stereotype.

So basically, Drew deserved better, and in my mind, she has a backstory for why she's mean to Piper.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk. I normally don't post that much, but I just had a strong opinion on this.

tl;dr I think Drew Tanaka was a criminally underdeveloped, underused, and stereotyped character.

[inazumaclown]

i drew aged-up inazuma girls :)

i don't hate GO but the way the OG girls were treated was okay at best, and very insulting at worst.

natsumi, who is canonically a workaholic, a born leader, an a self-made international detective (sort of), made into a housewife who doesn't know how to cook ? as a joke ? well bad joke and it ruined her and the relationship she has with endou, which is way more respectful than that. she could have been ANYTHING, but they had to take her power away and i will never forgive that

haruna as a raimon teacher (what is she teaching tho ? was it ever mentioned ?) is fine, and she had a sort of significant role but i still think she deserved better, so i headcannon her as a sport journalist bc my girl knows a thing or two about soccer

aki deserved much more in all seasons, OG or GO, it's really sad they reduced her to this maternal role in any context. if anything SHE could have been the raimon teacher rather than just tenma's babysitter waiting for ichinose (i do not like ichinose.). i liked her aesthetic tho, it suits her very well

touko appears in 1 frame in GO, but the games do observe that she's ''so much gentler than 10 years ago''. which means she got nerfed lmao so i drew her butch again

rika doesn't appear in GO, unsurprinsingly since she's always been hated by the fanbase. i really like her tho, and i hope she's well and true to herself in her brazen femininity :)

fuyuka as a nurse was a good choice in my opinion, it did add something to her character (which fair enough is easy to see when you're headcannoning the fuck out of her), like her desire to be useful to others and the fact that she's strong as fuck bc remember kids, nurses are strong as fuck and should be paid more

tl;dr : i loike gorls

[tinyfantasminha]

Beauty and the Beast got me feeling caca again so I NEED to share this theory/HC I have on Jack

Here we have Jack and Vil's hometown, as shown in Vil's flashback; there are lots of resemblances to Bella's hometown in BATB as we can see,

So let's consider for the time being that their hometown is indeed based on the village from BATB. If that's the case, then we could think that the Beauty and the Beast tale is passed down on the town as a tradition (similar to how the HoND story is passed down on the City of Flowers, which is supposed to be twst-ver of Paris.) So we could have instaces like this; (example:)

That's the library of the town - A myth from 300 years ago says that during that time only one girl in town would ever come here. Her story is passed down to everyone who comes to work in this library, and it has become a famous turistic attraction in town.''

Now, returning to Jack; Jack said that he never had too many friends when growing up (Vil could have been his only childhood friend, for all we know) but why is that? Is it truly because he had a lone wolf personality ever since a kid or maybe... the other kids would avoid him? (screenshots and tls from Shel_BB on YT)

If the BATB tale is well known to everyone in town, then surely one of the most jarring parts of the tale would be ''when the lone girl went to the woods to look for her father, she was brutally attacked by wolves.''

So because of that, wolves are seen as a bad omen in town, and depictions of wolves are seen as inheritently evil/dangerous. While the tale is obviously a myth and that statement does not apply irl, Jack is notheless faced with social exclusion for being associated with the wolves from the story. Vil said so himself ''those kids can't separate fiction from reality, so they had a problem with me. How stupid can they be?'' which again could be seen as a nod and parallel to the narrow-minded and overall ignorant mentality of the villagers from BATB.

It makes me think that Vil was not the only one who suffered bullying as kid, but Jack did as well; even if he was still independent as a kid, that could also very much be one of the factors that strengthened his current mentality of ''I didn't came here to make friends'' and self-betterment. Since he had almost no people to actually trust in because they were too scared of him, he embraced his ''scary big bad wolf'' persona as an exterior mask to the people around him. Only people who earn his respect and trust eventually can see just how Jack truly is; big-hearted, sensitive and loyal. (just like the Beast?)

tl;dr: jack could be twst from the wolves that attacked belle and also he deserves the entire world thanks for coming to my ted talk

[snackugaki-jestsjapesjokes]

blep blah, here have some old ass backrooms doodle content when the topic of "the beach episode" concept came up bluhp blooh brain nyooming but art hand isn't arting

i think what is super cute in modern fandom expression that I've seen is that in terms of making OCs or AUs is that sound seems to have a bigger role now than from what I remember when I was young. which I'm thinking has a lot to do with being able to clip audio easily or being able to make multi-track playlists whenever. y'all out here with reels of your art with voice claims and some of the most thoughtfully and artfully crafted soundtracks-- not even playlists, some of that shit is a straight up soundtrack level be real

89% tempted to try one of those shady "free" video/audio editing programs to make a LoFi chill beats study girl visualizer playlist with my iteration's boys ...

anyway gonna contemplate music headcanons for my iteration under the cut

From Turtle Tracks fan letter section, Archie run, #24

so real quick, my iteration is literally just them chilling, hanging out, being together in their mid 30s- early 40s, and then sometimes flashing back to their child/teen years in the 90s because tl;dr i have miiiiiinor beef my childhood turtles weren't quite as "90s" as they "could have been" (nvm I'm cackling at the milennial pop culture refs in Mutant Mayhem drop kicking me back into my adolescence)

but mehehehehe, keeping that they listened to Public Enemy and The Jungle Brothers

and aside from Top 40 musicians of the time... I feel like being outsiders themselves, having to sneak around to explore and learn about people and what's above the sewers had them eavesdropping into a lot of nighttime venues and getting into the underground and various niche subculture scenes that daytime Top 40 didn't play.

cannot tell me the lights, thumping and noise from bands playing hardcore or house or hosting cyphers or raves didn't attract these curious and funky little green dudes like moths to a flame

... Leo definitely fell in deep with the gregorian chant phase, soothing sounds of nature fads , a big fan of Orbital and he fell into that electronic, house, trance, eurodance rabbit hole right after. he also got into Celtic folk music but when his brothers caught his ass studying Michael Flatley to incorporate Riverdance footwork into his ninjutsu he got teased so mercilessly that he took great care to hide listening to it... which just made his stealth better so joke's on them heehoo

Not to mention they're from New York City, the underground music scene is always bangin' no matter the decade; feel like rap and punk got a lot of tracks on their mix tapes back in the day

Raph getting into the metal scene in his own exploring the city trips, and then progressed to music with that boom bap sound (cuz baby boy needs a way to come down off those high intensity moods idk ijs)

Donnie... just the amalgamation of his brothers, he needs that background noise while he's chewing on schematics and protoype development, he would definitely have been the mixtape maker/recording bootlegger (along with Mikey)

Mikey absolutely tagged along with his brothers sometimes whenever they went to their spots for music, though he himself backflipped into ska 'cuz Mikey is always for the people

my tmnt  iteration (where everyone made it past their 20s, splinter’s alive just old, venus is here, and they deserve some goddamn respite and shenanigans)

tmnt  iteration part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8 | part 9 | part 10 | part 11

tmnt  iteration omake 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11

lny visit 1 | 2

Keep reading

[myalchod]

Rhaenys was raised to be Queen; there is no way she’s not politically savvy enough to know what the implications of her so much as suggesting she’s not over it would have — for herself, for Corlys, for her children, for the people at large. While I firmly believe she ain’t over shite, she knows she doesn’t have a choice in acting as if she is, and in saying that she is, because the consequences of not being over it would be intolerable.

The palpable frustration we get from her in talking to Rhaenyra is just the first sign. But it goes beyond that. It’s not just the implications that she wasn’t enough, it’s the added weight of that when she looks at Rhaenyra and sees a headstrong young girl who hasn’t had a fraction of the training that she did — because you know Alysanne as well as Aemon would have made sure Rhaenys was raised to understand politics down to her bones. She knows how it works. (She knows, and yet the circumstances have forced her forever to stand outside, because if she doesn’t, then the Dance could well have happened a generation sooner. But instead, she puts on the mask and tells them all she has given up that dream, no matter how it still eats at her, to preserve what she does have. Which makes you wonder, as everything she has sacrificed for is stripped away bit by bit, whether she wonders if it was worth it in the end …)

but yeah, tell me again how Rhaenys is completely over being passed over for the Throne. Tell me again that it doesn't hurt every single time she's reminded. Tell me how she wouldn't change it, if she could.

[stitching-in-time]

Voyager rewatch s5 ep21: Someone to Watch Over Me

I'm all for comedy episodes, but this one is so full of old-timey gender stereotypes that I just can't enjoy it. Having the Doctor develop a crush on yet another younger blonde woman who he's supposed to be mentoring, and expect the audience to sympathize with him instead of thinking he's a creeper, is just too big an ask for this ep.

For starters, why does Seven need to date anyone? She's only been human for like two years, that seems a little fast to be getting into that, especially when she's never even experienced any kind of attraction to anyone. If ever a character was textually asexual, it's her, but because she's played by a hot actress, they will never allow her to be. So we get this exhausting compulsory heterosexuality, complete with godawful lines that sound like they were written in the 1950s about 'but you're a woman, Seven' and how that means she must naturally want or need a romantic relationship eventually, and with a man, of course. At which point I roll my eyes and grit my teeth and try to get through the sexism as best I can.

Star Trek really shouldn't steal plots from musical theatre- Deep Space Nine did that Brigadoon episode that wasn't exactly great, but Voyager trying to do My Fair Lady is worse. The whole point of My Fair Lady was that Higgins was a smug asshole who deserved to be miserable after how he treated Eliza, and she only comes back because it's a musical comedy from the 50s, and they have to have a happy ending. But he does get some comeuppance when Eliza walks out on him, and he realizes that his own poor behavior led to him losing someone he cared about. The Doctor gets no such comeuppance, beyond Seven being annoyed for a few minutes when she finds out, and he learns nothing from his little attempt to Svengali Seven into being his vision of what she should be- yet we're supposed to feel sorry for him when his crush isn't returned? No thanks!

I remember even as a kid being exhausted by having to watch another story about a bald middle aged man falling in love with a younger, blonde hot babe, especially since the reverse of that is rarely seen on screen. Maybe May-December Beauty and the Beast stories wouldn't creep me out so much if May-December Handsome and the Hag stories were just as common, but they're not. All I know is if you made twelve year old girls in the audience feel uncomfortable, you didn't make a good comedy.

Why the Doctor is even mentoring Seven in the ways of humanity, when he himself isn't even a human, and not very blessed with social graces himself, I have no idea. Honestly Tom was right when he said it was the blind leading the blind.

There are so many dumb rom com cliches here, right down to a scene with the Doctor taking Seven's hair down so we see she's actually beautiful (gag, but also doesn't that clue anyone in that her current hair and wardrobe doesn't look good on her? Please give her a uniform and a better hairdo!). There's some individual funny moments- the guy who played Lieutenant Chapman was great, his face journey when Seven asked him on the date was priceless, and Neelix trying to wrangle the drunk alien ambassador, then the crew having to figure out what to do with him so they wouldn't get in trouble when Mom the Captain got home, was actually cute. But after already having to deal with the Doctor's creepy crush on Kes, and thinking we're free of it once she left, only to have it restart with a new blonde girl dujour, was just too much. I wish they'd give Seven some good material, but instead we just get My Fair Borgy.

Tl;dr: A lightweight comedy that was too dependant on old timey gender stereotypes and heteronormativity to actually be fun.

[stvlti]

love is the knife in your hand | a Dune fanmix

I finally put all my songs for FeydPaul (derogatory) onto a playlist. This started out as a shitpost which may explain some of the wack song choices. All bangers though, promise

► TRACKS

01. Gimme What I Want - Miley Cyrus /// 02. SIMP - Full Tac, Lil Mariko & Rico Nasty /// 03. Dictator - REI AMI /// 04. I Can See You - Taylor Swift /// 05. Hardcore Romance - Beach Weather /// 06. Personal Jesus - Depeche Mode /// 07. Burn the Witch - PVRIS, Tommy Genesis & Alice Longyu Gao /// 08. House of Balloons / Glass Table Girls - The Weeknd /// 09. ecstacy - SUICIDAL-IDOL /// 10. Tennessee - Kevin Abstract & Lil Nas X /// 11. Beggin' (cover) - Måneskin /// 12. Kiss With A Fist - Florence + The Machine /// 13. Matador - Luvcat /// 14. I Come With Knives (Acoustic) - IAMX /// 15. Bells in Santa Fe - Halsey /// 16. Blood in the Cut - K.Flay /// 17. Trouble (Stripped) - Halsey /// 18. Ultraviolence - Lana Del Rey.

Tracklist last updated on 14 Nov 2024.

► META

I wasn't going to add a write-up to this one – it was supposed to be an ironic playlist – but then I couldn't resist coming back to add better and better song choices to the tracklist. It deserves a short explanation now, at the very least.

The tl;dr of it is that I was inspired by this fic and this fic and this fic. The different interpretations and dynamics of Feyd/Paul's relationship shown in those fics form the cornerstones for the relationships portrayed in these songs.

Some of these dynamics may seem contradictory to each other. That is by design. Many of the songs in this playlist are meant to go both ways: depending on your interpretation of Feyd's character and your specific flavour of canon divergence (which lbr is where 90% of FeydPaul scenarios play out), you could justifiably swap the dominant / submissive voices in the song lyrics between Feyd and Paul. Take "Dictator" by REI AMI for example:

The front part of the song is dominated by, well, a dominant persona:

I am not your queen, I'm your dictator

Bend the fucking knee, yeah bitch that was an order

Whatcha say to me? Huh? Bitch speak louder

You know I reign supreme, nah, you can't imitate her

The song takes a 180° turn in the back half, switching up the beat, the tempo, the instrumentation, the cadence; going from rap verses to singing; and going from braggadocio to a vulnerable confession in its lyrics. This forms, for all intents and purposes, a second distinct "voice":

You're so mean I'm scared to say "I wanna leave"

Cause every time I try, I get a tighter leash

You never know

Everything I do when I'm feeling low

Always about you, that's the way it goes

The way it goes, just the way it goes

Cold, why you gotta treat me so cold?

You say you love me but I don't know, don't know

The original song intends for both voices to reflect 2 sides of the same speaker, which could also work in the case of Paul (the first voice being the strongman leader he presents himself as in front of his followers, but also the dom persona he takes on to exploit Feyd's vulnerabilities in the bedroom; the second voice being the insecurities he has in his feelings for Feyd, which he can admit only to himself). But these 2 voices also work well as a dialogue between Paul and Feyd: Paul as the dominant voice and Feyd as the submissive, plaintive one, in a Feyd Lives AU / any AU where Paul holds all the bargaining chips; or Feyd as the dominant voice and Paul as the submissive, confessional one, in a Feyd wins the duel / Paul is captured by the Harkonnens AU. Ymmv.

There are a few songs where it only fits a specific interpretation of the dynamic though. The more fics I read, the more I think about the political positioning either of the boys take up in canon, the more obvious it is that any way you slice it, Feyd is at a disadvantage. He doesn't have Paul's prescience or the Voice, among other Bene Gesserit training, to say nothing about his Mentat abilities. (This is excluding the AUs that assume Feyd, being another prospect for the Kwisatz Haderach bloodline, has some level of prescient abilities akin to Paul's.) This is true even before Paul consumed the Water of Life and gained full access to his ancestral memories, and once he unlocked the Other Memory, Feyd is simply no match for him. So tracks like "Matador" and "Bells in Santa Fe" work better if you think of them as speaking from Feyd's POV:

Your cape is crimson

And you're waving it, snarling

The air is full of danger

I only wanted to put on a little skirt, a little show for you

...

I came crawling in on all fours

Knocking at your door, knocking at your door

I don't wanna bleed anymore

I just wanted love, but you wanted gore

You're my matador

While Feyd is the gladiator with a number of wins in the Geidi Prime arena under his belt, Paul is named after his grandfather who fought bulls for fun. Feyd is a Harkonnen, which is etymologically related to the "härka", Finnish for the bull. When they meet each other blade for blade, Paul is the metaphorical matador to Feyd's bull, not the other way around.

I'm also a fan of simp!Feyd, which is how we ended up with Lil Mariko & Rico Nasty on the track list (lol). But on a more serious note, I like my Feyd softer and besotted with Paul, with or without the context of Paul as Emperor ordering Feyd around. In that light, it's obvious who would be the one to come crawling, begging for love from the other man.

Leaving through the door without a word

You won't even notice, little bird

Better off dead so I reckon I'm headed to hell instead

So don't wait for me, don't wait for me, wait

It's not a happy ending

...

But, Jesus, you've got better lips than Judas

I could keep your bed warm, otherwise I'm useless

I don't really mean it, 'cause who the fuck would choose this?

Self loathing hours with Feyd lmao. I don't believe Feyd is capable of shame, but he bested Rabban in currying favours with the Baron and securing the na-Baron title. He must have a mind for politicking, and in a Feyd Lives AU, he would know full well that he is only useful to Paul's empire insofar as he amuses him and keeps his bed warm. It also really only makes sense for Feyd to call Paul "little bird" and not the other way around, seeing as Paul is the one who brings the Atreides hawk symbol to their union.

Speaking of union, I went back and forth on the inclusion of the Lana Del Rey track until I remembered that she wears a wedding dress in the music video. I've never paired "Ultraviolence" with my ships, not even for my most fucked up faves, for mainly 2 reasons: (1) I don't like to romanticise the domestic abuse detailed in the original context of that lyric. I prefer a dynamic where both parties retain a degree of control and reciprocity in the fucked up shit they do to each other. But in the case of FeydPaul the pain kinks just write themselves, and they would be fully reciprocal. I can see Feyd being the masochist to Paul's more violent tendencies as much as I can see Feyd enacting his learned sadism onto Paul. They would both enjoy it. Also, as every shipper knows, in another life these two would've been betrothed to each other according to the Bene Gesserits' breeding programme.

Heaven is on earth

I will do anything for you, babe

Blessed is this union

Crying tears of gold, like lemonade

It's literally a wedding song!

(2) I never included "Ultraviolence" in my ship playlists before because the lyrics are kinda cringe. "tears of gold like lemonade"? really? But then again, FeydPaul is largely a Romeo & Juliet type of pairing - they're star-crossed, they're madly in love, and they're teenagers! They would be the type to make cringey promises to each other.

[pink-strawberry-kissess]

I think Nick is doing fanservice to both Aeon and Cleon. He said that there was "sexual tension" between Claire and Leon in the fall scene in Infinite Darkness. I don't know if you saw this. So I don't trust that man 🤦

so

if anything actually - it seems to be more from claire's va that's been actively pushing cl*on (there's literally articles about this)

and i do think it's partially career focused so claire has more relevance in the series (so she has more work, since it seems like she doesn't have a huge portfolio outside of being claire's va, which is fine, it's just kinda cringy)

if you look into any of her interviews she constantly brings up leon in some capacity and has to mention shipping them because "leon deserves better/deserves a nice girl." which gave me such cringe, pick me vibes that i immediately went to go to her other interviews to see if she does that a lot

i don't ever remember nick saying there was sexual tension in infinite darkness tbh. if anything he still treats claire like a kid so that's just fuckin weird to say there's sexual tension

anyways

tl;dr claire's va pushes more for cl*on which is weird because even she has said herself that the ship is dead. she's doing it for fan service reasons and to "satisfy" those shippers while in the same breath mentions that the ship won't go anywhere.

side note: i probably won't mention my opinions on nick until i have more info/formulated a more cohesive stance since i've changed my opinion on nick

[real-fire-emblem-takes]

maybe its cause im exclusively a tumblrina and refuse to use other platforms but why doesnt anybody talk about the implications of that one scene in part 4 of Radiant Dawn with Naesala, Skrimir, etc like genuinely it felt like he would've HAPPILY let Skrimir kill him if Leanne and Nealuchi weren't there maybe it's just because i have personal experience* i can project onto him, but it just reads as him being suicidal, he's fine, happy even, to have Skrimir kill him because he believes he fully deserves it the fact he's always wearing long sleeves with this in mind also has implications, especially since we know some laguz carry knives around, so while i imagine it's mainly to just hide the signs of a blood pact i wouldn't be surprised if he had some self-inflicted scars he's hiding too tl;dr: i love Marianne too, and i can do an entire essay on that girl one of these days, but i'd appreciate if she wasn't the only character we talked about that had implications of being suicial (*i've gone to therapy for several years, a decade now if im correct, and i am doing much better these days, haven't had a thought like that in about a year or two now, so yeah can confirm therapy helps and my personal experience is more past personal experience)

.

[valkyrie-kun]

rewatching yu gi oh notes: the seal of orichalcos

i mentioned in a previous post that 4th season is my least favorite. and it was while i was on it. but then i started an eyesore, literally that animation 5th season and found myself liking 4th one a lot better, and wondering, why i did not get it at first?

and i found my answer in a random yt comment, saying that pace changed. everything changed at that one season.

atem is not invincible. atem is not perfect - he is heroic alright and intelligent and brave, but he is also cruel, he is determined to win at the expense of huting people, he is temperamental and you can mess with his head if you know where to hit, thanks rafael. and he lost because of himself - he was his own downfall, and ceased to be "perfect fearless hero" (no PUB reference). for a short while, but our perspective on him had to change.

he is calling HIS dark magician useless, he is sacrificing cards left and right, he has that emptiness behind his eyes, only to have R toss him like a sack of potatoes (twice).

2. mai is not sidelined. mai is one of the drawing forces of antagonism, bravely contrasting her girls girl + i deal with my own problems image, after she had no strenght left to stick to it. i can and probably will write separate post on the importance of her character regression, and how it is a nice reminder that things are not meant to be linear.

mai's anti-climatic outro was sad and she deserved better, but it is the most poignant moment of realism in the series. because, healing does not happen overnight, and life events can change our core. sometimes, the power of friendship needs a little help, too.

3. there is no singular villian, and though i do not like dartz that much and find his biker gang far more interesting than him (again fucking dub and censorship on their backstories), the disntiction of good and evil is blurred. there is no yami-someone. good people can become bad if they are cornered (mai, rafael, alister, valon), and bad people do have some good left in them, hence the final dartz scene.

tl;dr, some things could have been done a whole lot better, but overall very important arc in my opinion, for the development of the plot and our understanding of characters. mai did deserve better, but it is all winding up to the final lessons.

nothing last forever. and some things will not work out according to our plans.

but that does not mean they won't work out for the better.

ps, vocal performances of everyone were 10/10.

[shredsandpatches]

Can you expand on Faust's final fate not being earned being central to all versions of the story? Because in the Goethe at least I couldn't agree more. Faust's salvation has nothing to do with Faust and that's the point.

OKAY SO. I do want to preface what's likely to be a horrible incoherent ramble that contradicts itself like five different times per paragraph by mentioning, first, that I haven't fully worked out an actual argument or Grand Unified Theory of Faustology, I'm just kind of turning it over in my head, and, that I recognize that the Christian framework of the original versions of the story isn't always intended literally in adaptations and doesn't always reflect orthodox Christian notions of salvation and damnation. I'm still grappling with what those concepts mean to Goethe, particularly, what the ultimate end of the "ever upward" approach might be. There are definitely multiple people likely to be reading this with far more in-depth knowledge of Goethe than I have (and MUCH better German). I do think, though, that that sense of undeservedness cuts across versions of the story--certainly the serious approaches starting with Marlowe--and I also think it's important because it makes us consider why it doesn't feel quite right. What moral standards are we using to consider either Faust himself or the version of the universe in which he operates?

(eta: put in a readmore)

Marlowe's version, for instance, is very much still informed by the Reformation-era context that originally produced the story, and is rooted in his own experience being a Cambridge student at a time when Calvinism was the hot topic of the day. He presents a sharp disconnect between the theological and moral arcs of the play: as an article I recently read puts it, the primary focus is on Faustus' sins against God, not against other people (most of his actions against other people are either dumb pranks, actions arguably taken in self-defense, or actions against targets that the original audience would see as deserving, like the pope). Faustus isn't a particularly good person, of course, but neither is he particularly evil, and the idea that one's reprobate status (or impenitence, it's ambiguous) would be reflected in one's actions is weirdly absent. He's at his least sympathetic before he sells his soul. The theological arguments for his damnation are pretty cohesive but I think it also doesn't feel right on a human level: does this mean we're meant to question our own sympathies, or Calvinist/general Protestant theology? And then with Goethe's version you have the opposite issue, where Faust's motivations as described are more sympathetic than those of Marlowe's Faustus--he wants happiness, satisfaction, youth--and at the same time he causes so much collateral damage with his massive self-absorption. He doesn't generally seem to act out of malicious intent and generally doesn't actively want to wreck people's lives specifically, but at the same time he doesn't pay heed to things like the obvious and foreseeable consequences of seducing a girl who lives in a strict patriarchal society or asking a demon to convince people to move out of their house for urban planning purposes and only really acknowledges them when it's too late. What does it mean, in this case, for him to be saved, for whatever value of "saved" exists in Goethe's universe? Or, since Goethe seems to operate on a strongly allegorical level especially in Faust II (I haven't even gotten into the whole cosmic-wager side of the story) what are the big ideas at work here? We have to tease those out instead of just passing judgment on the character, and we have to hash out how Faust-the-character is quintessentially human and what that means.

So, like. The tl;dr version is that I think that because the Faust narrative is a collection of stories about our standards, what we value and what we condemn, and our human limitations and where we stand in relation to (whatever concept of) the eternal, his ultimate fate is always unsettling because the idea of sort of weighing up everything about a person and finally defining them might be relatively easy from a distance but the more you think about it the harder it gets, and it's important that we sit with that. If that makes sense.

[hawkth1ng]

everyone: alastor's gonna be the big bad of hazbin!!

excellent, classic theory! however, may i suggest: lilith.

like, everyone's so worried that lilith being a bad person/mother will just give us stella 2.0, which is valid but i don't really agree with that. imagine with me here, if you will: lilith being a bit of a bad mother, not in the sense that she's downright abusive, but in the sense that she drove a wedge between charlie and lucifer (despite charlie clearly being a daddy's girl) as best she could in an attempt to put charlie on a path that she wanted. however, charlie was so much like her father that despite lilith's best efforts charlie made decisions that lilith didn't really approve of because of lucifer's influence.

LIKE YOU CAN SEE THIS IN MORE THAN ANYTHING! the visuals during charlie's part of lilith physically taking charlie away from lucifer, and the line "all that i'm hoping/now that my eyes are open/is that we can start again/not be pulled apart again" being "pulled apart" suggests there was some outside force that strained their relationship, some outside force like lilith!

so i'm just imagining a lilith who sent alastor to keep tabs on her daughter (via a deal she somehow weaseled out of him) and when she finds out that the hotel is actually working? well now she has no choice but to go down there and try to stop it herself, to try and get her daughter to see sense. pitting husband against wife and mother against daughter. queen of hell against king and princess of hell. oh and alastor's here too because lilith still has him on a leash :]

NOT TO MENTION alastor being the bbeg just seems a tad bit too predictable to me? like yeah at this point it's plausible, but also pretty much the entire fandom has been like "oh he's totally gonna betray them!"

so just hear me out. imagine, if you will: alastor, who despite his better judgement grew attached to the hotel and its inhabitants. alastor, who has a soft spot for the princess even if he thinks she's a little misguided in her attempts to redeem sinners. alastor, who is forced by no choice of his own to betray them because of the collar clamped tightly around his neck. a collar that, if he makes one wrong move, will quickly strangle him. i just. AUGHGHEHG

tl;dr i think we deserve a strong woman bbeg. i support women's rights and wrongs y'all 🙏

[denpamen]

Thoughts on Ellsworld? :D

I’m actually glad you asked because many thoughts. It’s complicated because I do happen to like them for what they are, as characters. However, I kind of have a natural distaste for genderbends in general (this is personal and around my experiences with gender presentation.) I don’t engage with a lot of Ellsworld content too because I kind of find some of it obnoxiously gendered. I get the appeal is somewhat so they can be girly girls but sometimes I roll my eyes because I’m like let them be awesome too!

My main gripe is with Tori because I feel like people won’t let her be evil. I have seen several (official and non official) takes like “Tori actually gets along with her friends, she just giggles and braids their hair!” and I’m always like, what? Wouldn’t she be a kickass villain like Tord? I also think Tord does love his friends but that’s a post for another day. Why doesn’t Tori love blowing shit up like Tord? Let my girl be free.

TL;DR i do like them as characters and they’re cute but it’s hard to avoid that obnoxious gendering that just comes with genderbends. They deserve better.

I was also gonna talk about the Tord h/nt/i thing, but if I made a post on how fucking sick I was of that in general we’d be here all day.