#the things i see people say on this site are unthinkable

[lizzzybooo]

If you're happy about more than 1400 Israeli people being murdered brutally, most of them civilians, then unfollow me please.

[the-travelling-witch]

Hello ^-^, I really love the way you write Jade.

I just read your "You light up my World" fic (I just love fics with the twin in their merform in general) and it reminded me of a fanfic idea I once had. I read that you don’t take requests but that we can send you ideas. So I thought that as a fellow Jade lover maybe you would like this scenario as well. And if you're a fan of angst/comfort ;)

"Jade going swimming with his human s/o in the coral sea or visiting his hometown, a beach etc. Then at some point s/o gets attacked by a shark (preferable without any bitten off body parts) and Jade protects them."

[re: you light up my world]

ahhhh thank you so much!! you may have heard of the saying that the way to a man’s heart is through the stomach, but the way to my heart is through telling me you enjoy the way i write characters >///<

speaking of my heart, these slimy tweels have wormed their way in there and i can’t see them getting out anytime soon (not that i’d want them too ofc)

and thank you so much for reading and respecting my rules!! it sounds like such a normal thing but you’d be surprised, so thanks!! ^^;

also yes i am your resident angst enjoyer and have killed both the character and the reader-insert on more than one occasion, so maybe the body part thing is a good thing to tell me; i unfortunately don’t have much time to write in general atm, so i’ll just give my first impressions and thoughts on the scenario you provided

needless to say, i’ve made up soooo many self-ship scenarios where i get to visit the twin’s home, we needed a coral sea hometown event like yesterday

to say that jade would be ecstatic to show you his home would be an understatement, though of course it is as always masked behind a carefully calm demeanour.

he’d love showing you around the place he grew up in, from his room, to his “house”, to abandoned shipwrecks he used to play in and his old school where the twins met azul.

all the while, he’s grinning as he pulls you along, even more subject to going along with his whims now that you’re reliant on him to get around. not that he minds, of course, no the notion that you’re helpless without him… would admitting that it excites him make him a bad person? fufufu, most people seem to think of him as such already, so he might as well indulge, right?

actually, it’s kind of unthinkable that jade would leave you alone for long enough in an area where you could be attacked and he has more foresight and strength than to let something like the current rip you away from him.

but the fact is, it did happen and figuring out who or what to blame for the situation is the last thing on either of your minds as the dark grey body looms above you.

so far you’ve very narrowly avoided the predator, only grazing your arm on its sharp teeth but the pain and the bone-chilling crunch of its jaw snapping something else in half send waves of adrenaline through your body. you have to calm down, you know that, or you scared mind will make reckless decisions but that thought just panics you more to the point where you heart feels like it’ll jump out your chest.

in a morbid stroke of luck, however, there’s someone who knows the smell of your blood far better than any common shark could and he latches on with frightening precision. sure, jade might not be able to deter the shark on size alone but he is fast and uses its fixation on you to drag his sharp claws over the side of the shark’s face, darkening the waters with more blood before the shark swims off with its injured eye.

to you the resolution feels too quick, the threat too fast gone for the feeling of imminent death that ensnared your heart seconds ago. jade, who is used to the violence of his home, very carefully loops around you in the familiar way he always does, giving you something to ground yourself on as he stirs you away from the incident site.

by the time you arrive at his home and your wounds are dressed, you’ve calmed down enough to actually process what had happened and you tear up in residual fear. despite your environment, jaded notices and curls around you protectively, holding you and stroking his webbed hands down your trembling back.

it’s only when you start apologising for not being careful enough, that you endangered him too when you scarped your hand on an old nail that he gently shushes you. instead, he offers his own apologies for not being there to protect you in the first place and how the responsibility naturally falls to him considering you are way outside of your element.

for the rest of your stay, jade is even more careful with you, opting to show you around the shallower parts of the coral sea. not only are the bright waters around the atlantica museum a very pretty sight or stargazing from the ocean shore a lovely date idea, there are also far less dangers around and most creatures are way more scared of jade up here.

the moray is also even more attached to your side now than before (you didn’t think it was possible but here you are). determined not to let your stay in the coral sea be tainted by this incident, he’ll do all the safe activities with you to calm down; be it hand making jewellery from shells and pearls you’ve collected or looking at the bright and colourful plants and schools of fish around.

yes, jade is used to the violence of the deep sea. and yes, normally, it always thrilled him. however, he managed to find something so precious none of the treasures sunken to the sandy ocean floor can compare and he’s determined to keep you by his side.

[bliphany]

Re: the Good Omens leak but No spoilers here bc I didn’t see it

(This is just a rant)

I loved how people helped each other not to be spoiled if they didn’t wish to. There were just some small part of people and how they treated creators and each other were so weird to me.

Personally, I was indifferent whether people actively seek for the leak or provide it privately with the recipient’s consent.

Yeah, consent is the keyword here.

Discourse people here loved to show how we should all respect boundaries and consent yet mocking people who felt upset because they were spoiled unexpectedly.

(I loved that some people tried to comfort those who were upset by saying kind things, sharing positive thoughts such as stories were much more than a blip moment or David Tennant was in the show yet even he watched the whole show in one go. I loved you people. There’s always light in this world.)

Those mean mocking was not that. Those who complained that “what about my fun?/why couldn’t we fans just have fun?/why people took Neil Gaiman’s advice/respected his asking?”

Which sounded to me a lot like those “why we have to acknowledge/respect _____ now? what about all my fun?”

Speaking of Neil Gaiman’s advice. It seemed that we forgot that creators, whose idea made the art available to people in the first place, might had ideas of how and in what pace they wanted it to happen?

Acting as if respecting the creator’s wish was weak and stupid and killing all the fun was unthinkable to me.

You know how it sounded like to me? That people, who just wanted to have their fun it was their feelings that’s most important, treated the ones who actually made the art as just labor in the way that capitalist companies exploit labor so that they could have their fun instantly. It was ironically that this happened on this site where people seemed to be proudly anti capitalism. Maybe when they got to be the exploiter it was all fun and fine.

Just because you didn’t make tons of money like those “evil” capitalist corporations never meant you wouldn’t act like one.

Treat people as people with empathy, not tools whose solely purpose are making you feel good. Acknowledge people’s need for boundaries and practice honoring consent. It’s the basic line. Not stupid nor weak. It’s just being kind.

[heartofhubris-a]

Hello, as you are the top Harding blog...any HC you'd like to share? No problem if not, but a "hardy" congratulations anyway 👏

Ahhh thank you!! I've got a couple small ones, but as always, these are my own personal HCs!

He's a closed toed crocs truther. Originally, Harding swore by clogs that most doctors used, but it only took one time in the foam for him to realize that he was wrong on insisting on just the wood ones. He likes them well enough, but the comfort made the last 30 minuets of the surgery (closing up) a breeze. Plus cleaning and care are much easier.

Sex positive ace. He's a sexual through and through and never through anything of it because he's biromantic.... if he was introduced throughly to those terms. But, he's got Mar, and he really doesn't care if people are sexually attractive, since he wouldn't go after them anyway.

Low support autistic - type a or autistic, idc. He's so strict on the rules, so through on his reads and memories, his routines. Harding excels in social situations, meaning he never cared to think if he was autistic or not. The way he was was idealized in his field and family, so he simply thought himself playing his role - quite happily at that

One day post s1, Harding says something untold to Sung infront of Fran and within 30 seconds she swooped him away and was just "Harding!! Why??" Leading to his confusion, dismissal of Fran, and moving on. Until he mentioned it to Martha and she kind of hesitated, Harding asked why. Martha was slow to say "You do say racist things, dear. I think you should take Fran up on the class." And he does and though he never apologized to Sung, he does end up treating Sung much more like he does in the book - with some respect.

The only way Harding asks for support is in the middle of the night when he can't sleep and he slides into his partners arm. In the daylight, the best he would do is a tight squeeze of hand, and his smile only slightly more genuine.

He started the embroidered lab coats. He was made fun of for 3 months for the idea. Patients loved them. Hardijg once again pointed out the sanitary cost and the customization costs being roughly equal anyway. The lab coat became a right of passage. (He still has his first attempts)

If Harding really likes someone, he won't bring them to the bar or get to know them. He won't have lunch/dinner. He won't go to a Cafe. If he really wants to offer his emotions to someone, if he wants to really invite them close, he brings them to a park. If they're distracted by the bird calls naturally, he invites them into birding. If he has to invite them and they're excited, they're instructed on good sites and books. If they're dismissive, Harding doesn't treat them negatively, but he's certainly judged them harsher l.

He will openly and willingly teach anyone anything they'd like to know - providing they show humility. If they refuse to relinquish their pride, he will ensure they are treated to the highest of his standards.

What's modern media? Aka Harding just. Doesn't care to watch TV and media; he will watch instructional videos and he is not illiterate on technology, but don't ask him to summarize the most recent (Harding checks notes.) Game of thrones? Wait that's been off air for how many years?

When Harding was a young man, he had a very close friend. They'd been friends for nearing a decade when Harding was told suddenly by his wife the unthinkable. Due to stress at work and his life, he had taken his own life. Harding couldn't attend the funeral, but he did send the widow enough money from his funds to pay for the funeral and her own life for the year after his pension ran dry. To this day, Martha and he travel to see her and their children every year in that very month, as well as both deciding to send gifts for his three sons, and Christmas cards.

Martha was infertile. Harding, for his own merit, didn't have good faith in his own ability. When Martha told him her state, he laughed on accident, before very quickly explaining why. She was extatic, but they refused to foster as his job was too severe, and her career was too important to her.

Harding (book moreso) doesn't particularly care for alcohol. TV Harding isn't a huge fan but he likes to relax due to the first shot or two, but doesn't like how he feels after that.

Medical Marijuana? He's fucking THERE FOR IT.

Speaking of: harm reduction entered his vocabulary once and never left. Harding never wants someone to turn to drugs to dealjust with life, but fuck. Harding is going to encourage every damn oppuritinty to get someone better. He will encourage you if you succeed, and be extremely firm, though not hurtful, if you fail. He'd be there to remind someone of sobriety.

"A couple small ones" I claimed.

I'm sooooo in love with him

[miss-littevi]

Hiyaaaa!

I'm just going to pop in with all the asks because I think your characters are adorable, and I'd love to hear more about them.

Answer for whichever characters you like, even your cyberpunk ones! I just like to enable people to chit chat about their OCs.

So, I have all the prompts, I look forward to reading it!

♥ - family headcanon

♡ - romantic headcanon

∇ - old age/aging headcanon

Hello and welcome to my inbox. Thank you for your interest in all my OCs. I decided to stick to my FFXIV-OCs for now 😊

The answers are in (post got a little bit longer but that's okay I hope ^^):

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

♥ - family headcanon (for Yorina)

Yorina is the mother of a little son, Florent. He was born towards the end of Shadowbringer and after his birth it became incredible hard for Yorina to leave home to do whatever the Warrior of Light has to do. In consequence, she showers little Florent with love, attention, and gifts whenever she is at home and became one of those “I can’t see my child cry for more than 2 minutes”-moms faster than she could notice it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

♡ - romantic headcanon (for Yorina)

When you think about romantic people, Yorina wouldn’t be the first person that comes to your mind. But the people who know her better, especially Aymeric - her husband – know she has a romantic side that shines through when they are alone, watching the night sky. Those quiet moments under the open sky when no one except her loved one is around, are her version of a perfect date.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

♡ - romantic headcanon (for Ilmie)

Ilmie can get really flirty and seductive if she wants to, but she wouldn’t call that romantic by default. For her, ‘romantic’ is the intimate familiarity and closeness “when the show is over and the spectators are gone”, when “songs and souls mingle”.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

∇ - old age/aging headcanon (for Yorina – because I still haven’t decided on what will happen in Ilmie’s life after the current MSQ ^^’’)

The thought of aging and growing old frightens Yorina so she tries her best to not think about it. She loves to travel the world, visit archaeological excavation sites (what a word… hope I looked it up correctly xD) and ruins, salvage antiques. She has no idea how she could live a happy life once her body will be too old and/or weak to do all those things she loves dearly. Living a life as an old noble lady, sitting in front of the fireplace in her ishgardian residence, gossiping with other old ladies of the nobility, is unthinkable for her by now. (don’t know if I interpretated the prompt/question right, but that is the answer for now)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you again for the asks and I hope you enjoy the answers I could give you <3

I enjoyed answering them, that much I can say 😊 (even though I am not sure all my words make sense for somebody who isn't inside my head ^^'')

[starrydeckhand]

1, 3, 14, and 38 please c: <2

heya!!!!! :3

what are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are?

i feel like the obvious answer is the traumas, and yeah they did shape me in a way, but it kinda feels like cheating lol! rn i'm trying to pinpoint what really made me, me. i think art in general molded me in unthinkable amount of ways, like all the movies, songs and games i've consumed. the next thing would be all the places i've visited with my family when i was young, all the museums, historical sites and foreign countries, they all gave me this sense of wonder and curiosity and wisdom i think. and there's this thing i don't remember, cause maybe it was always there, but ever since i was very little (like 3/4 y/o maybe younger even) i've always had this strong sense of justice. i'd regularly beat up kids in my kindergarten, who bullied my disabled friend and the pattern would repeat in school and in other areas of my life. and nothing got me more joy and in trouble more than this lmaoooo

3. 3 films you could watch for the rest of your life and not get bored of?

OHHHHHHH THIS ONE IS SO HARD!!!!!! literally i've been staring at my letterboxd thinking pondering wondering what to put here, but ig i'll never be fully satisfied with what i pick so here: Speed Racer (there's just so much going on, go watch a trailer rn and you'll see what i mean), Pride and Prejudice and Whisper of the Heart!!

14. what’s something you’ve always wanted to do but maybe been to scared to do?

i've always wanted to do a karaoke night with my friends! i love singing, nothing relaxes me more in the world than singing and it's always meant a lot to me in terms of connecting with people! that's why i love live music, etc!! but i'm scared of damaging my friends eardrums with my horrible voice and i get the stage fright a lot, sadly.

Tho, recently one of my friends from uni enrolled me and a few other folks into karaoke queue at a bar (without telling us about it lol) and i was going to just skip it, but when another of my friends heard my name being called out and realized i was going to chicken out, he just started pushing me towards the stage, the bastard (affectionally)! i ended up singing with all of them and it was so nice C: so maybe i'll try it someday again! but i still got a long way to go me thinks

38. fave song at the moment?

AUUUUUUUUUU so tough!! HMMMM UUU I GOT IT!!!!! Love is Fire by GRLwood is SOOOO fun!!!!!!!

thank you so much for the ask!!!!!!!!! it was a lot of fun and good thinking C: <2

[outeremissary]

9 People You'd Like to Get to Know Better

Tagged by @turbulentpumpkin43. Thanks for thinking of me! I know I haven't been around much (for reasons we don't need to get into), but truly nothing summons me faster than the email notification about a tag game where I know I'm going to have to say something horribly embarrassing about myself.

Three Ships: I mean, if we're counting stuff with OCs then obviously anyone following my knows Balthazar and Tristian (and the wonderful polycule with Vio) is my number one. Aside from that, the latest volume of Witch Hat has fully converted me into an Agott/Coco true believer. I actually did like the Coco/Tarteh vibe but Agott's special brand of slowly changing rival just has me by the throat. Aside from that? Ummm. Elliot and Leo from Pandora Hearts? Does that count? I did my full reread of Pandora Hearts while afk in September and those two have had me since like 2012 or 2013 or whenever they were introduced in the English release. But now that I'm older and more mature I can better appreciate what the messy later arcs had to give, and that's the beauty of a relationship between equals corrupted by a growing imbalance no one has the strength to acknowledge and devotion so deep it tears both of their lives apart. That's awesome. 11/10, everyone read Pandora Hearts and I'm not even joking

First Ever Ship: Gamers, back in early 2012 when I was in middle school and could only see images on the computer at school because searching for anything visual online was mega bad for rural internet, a friend of mine used a science classroom computer to discover you could find non-canon images of The Legend of Zelda if you searched terms like "Link blue" and scrolled down a couple rows. I distinctly remember this as the first ever time I really understood the concept of "fan art," and more importantly as my entry into fandom as we all began to realize many of these came from the same site: a place called "DeviantArt." Some of these contained such salacious and unthinkable things as two boys holding hands and blushing, and also both of those boys were Link. I was so captivated by these mysterious images that I followed them to their Four Swords Adventures manga RP fandom source, where I am not proud to say the first "ship" I adopted as such was Vio (Violet Link for people who spent their time doing better things at thirteen) and Shadow (Shadow Link, of course). That's right, everyone! It was edgy Link selfcest yaoi between a traitor and an angsty villain all the way down!!! And you know what? When I write that I don't think my taste has changed. Except the selfcest. Mostly.

The other, more respectable first ship I remember not long after that was Ulquihime. What can I say, there's just something about the Stockholm syndrome of it all.

Last Song: No title - REOL. Narrowly missed this being edgy early Vocaloid. I've been revisiting old favorites recently.

Last Movie: I'm pretty sure it was Surf's Up. For whatever reason my friend decided we should rewatch it when I visited him a few weeks ago. Holds up better than it should, but I've rewatched it twice in little over a year and truly that is my Surf's Up limit. That trip was also when my friend forced me to watch Barbie and the D&D movie. Look at me catching up on relevant pop culture only for fucking Surf's Up to be what made this list.

Currently Reading: I'm pretty sure this came up last time, but because I haven't gotten started on a better book since then I'm unfortunately still periodically chipping at The Thousand Deaths of Ardor Benn. This book fucking sucks. Don't read it. If we could manga and stories that are actually good I recently did a Witch Hat Atelier reread after getting volume 11!!! That volume is. So painfully personal.

Currently Watching: Cyberpunk: Edgerunners and Jujutsu Kaisen season 2. JJK is with my friend for weekly hangout, but Edgerunners is a solo endeavor because it was bumming him out way too much. Good show though. Also JJK was way more of a bummer than expected in ways that caught me off guard??? I'm not getting over what happened to that girl, I really got fucking got by that scene. Jesus

Currently Consuming: Nothing. Just finished dinner, where I had a chicken sandwich and fries. I need groceries. It's dire.

Currently Craving: doing something creative, but that would require moving the giant zine pile on my chair........ this is how I'm procrastinating

I'm sorry, but I'm actually not tagging anyone on this tonight! I haven't been on enough lately to know who has or hasn't done it, and frankly I'm not ready to be back on Tumblr enough to map that out. If you're seeing this and want to do it, please go ahead and do it. Tag me like I tagged you, we are collaborators in this and I want to see what you say.

[thedawnbeauty]

The letter

“ I write this with the promise and guarantee this will fall into your hands, and your hands alone. He has a mage, who could promise this. Currently, in the middle of a storm, I write to you in the middle of the night. As I write, I can feel his eyes over my shoulder. I have somehow made it to Snow Mystic, and I .. am in so much trouble. Mother…”

There was a tear stain, after the the last sentence, as she dabbed her ink and continued.

“ I have been unable to tell anyone.. anything. Everything I say, or do is questioned and dissected, and then used against me. I’ve been called emotional, irrational, and stupid. But, as I write this letter; I should inform you, it was Caspian who believed I have been running for too long, and it was time I write home. He is a very strange man, on his shell he is cruel and mean. But behind closed doors, he is kind and considerate. I’ve never seen a man, like this. In order to gain my freedom to roam, Caspian gave me one condition; to write to you and tell you everything. I think I am long pass regretting my decisions to accept Miguel invitation and visit Paraiso. I didn’t really understand how much you, Maya and everyone was keeping me safe and shelter. I think I will carry this decision with me, for the rest of my life. If I hadn’t have left, none of this would have ever happened. I suppose.. I should start with the everything and the beginning. Miguel invitation and death turned into a roller coaster of emotions and trials. It lead me to unthinkable situations. Like Adelena Conan running away from her home, being forced to marry a French nobleman and then helping her flee such a marriage. I can promise you, the state I found her in.. continues to strengthen my belief that marriage may not ever be for me. I’ve been told, this Frenchmen is still on the hunt for her. I buried my knowledge of her and information to anyone who passes I simply say, we exchange letters and nothing more. 

I was a lead a fool, believing Vergil wanted a relationship with me. Believing, that I could step into my father shoes. I was running, when I could barely walk. He brought me to my mothers grave site and showed me Paraiso. I f e l t important, needed. But I was blinded by my ego, and my desire have a purpose there and I agreed to things I could never take back .. I woke to find myself a queen and witnessed the cost of it, civilian lives. While I was in Paraiso , so I was visited by many people first by this prince from Rovan, who promise to faithfully stay by my side, and yet he ran as soon as the first sign of trouble came . I was introduced to Michael Blackwood, who easily notice my inexperience and naïve nature, and offered me a chance to leave that he would walk with me in his home. I refused him.. I shouldn’t have.”

She dibbed into a different color ink and continued “ but the worst betrayal of all was my handmade Imelda, who I had shared my secrets with, and told my plans. I convinced myself , I am too young, inexperienced, I know nothing about ruling, and I told only IMELDA. I arrived at the Capitol to meet Ulisis to surrender myself for my crimes and everything I have done only to find Imelda and Vergil were there to do the complete opposite .  it.. get worse. …”

She looked over her shoulder to see Caspian was asleep as she continued. “ Vergil openly attacked Ulisis and revealed to me the guard who had protected Estefania sister, was known other than Edward. My brother is alive, and I hesitated and I panic. I forgot all of my teaching, and j cracked. I would not be writing this letter today, if it weren’t for a young woman named Samira. She risked her life, and something personal, something I told Edward I would never speak again about, to save our lives. I know as you are reading this, there are some gaps, some questions. But, It took many weeks to recover, and Edward and I opened a letter from my ma, while he were together he wrote to me before she denied. She had left me a small home, and a place I could rest my head. But, when I arrived, I was sentenced to the towers, Caspian learned of my tales, and exactly what happened in Paraiso. He keep me out of sight , and warmed me the implications he could face for harboring a fugitive . I was there for almost three months before he let me out, and informed me his wife had passed, and he needed a companion. Someone to stand pretty next to him at a ball, that is where I am heading now.

I should warn you, while he as in prison, a man named Charles said he had plans for me. I think they are attempting to make me Caspian next wife, and I, fear it may be the only thing that keeps my head on my shoulders. I really messed up momma, and I know I am passed your forgiveness, but I hope to one day earn your love and affection, and to make your proud. I love you and miss you.

Forever, Your daughter Aurora”

* the letter had been written weeks ago, while. Aurora was onboard to Rovan, and was promised it would fall into Hana hands. The mun only now got the chance to do lol *

@my-sensorium

[zhalar]

i did these posts with books i read in 2020 i think, bout to make another for black sails. this is just a yardstick for my progression with the series, aka my extensive nonsensical notes and quotes i liked etc. no clear indicators whos saying what and when, just Vibes and Real Drama Television so i'll generally remember whats Happening. watch out its quite a wordy fucknig thing if you press read more also i started at episode 4 of season1 for some fucking reason and it pisses me off immensely. IT TOOK ME SIX MONTHS AND NINE DAYS TO FINISH THIS SHOW. I NEED TO PUT THESE THOUGHTS SOMEWHERE. heres also a twitter thread of reaction for however long the site's gonna be usable at this point

(watch and read as my opinions on characters and decisions change in real time)

ep4 fuckign FUCK jack is the funniest motherfucker in this SHOWWW . "you'd be a valuable asset to anybody .. my [most valuable thing??] is my wits [and as someone who just lost 5000 pesos of their own crew's money, it isn't worth much atm]

"and that, my darling, i feel compelled to state out loud, life is simply too FUCKING SHORT".

also anne as the muscle and him as the wits.❤️ straight rights

ep5 "i specifically tried to talk her OUT of getting wrapped up in my selfish scheme" it's the Best when men are. self-aware.

ep6 eleanor holding john's life in her fingers❤️ tasty delicious i love women with power yes girl destroy every other person for the woman who you love

the enslaved people fucking their captors shit right up. i love this flavor. fucking hell. fucking fuck the stunt scott pulled almost got me ooohhhh thank god it didn't go as i feared.

john has this cadence about him it's like he's constantly trying to sell me a used car

BILLY ? FLINT. ARE YOU. FOR REALLLL

"you had your say. now i'll have mine" ANNEEEE

ep7 gates: "because billy. Wasn't expendable. To Me." MY MANNNNNNNNNNNNN IM GONNA. CRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

eleanor PLEASE get your head outta your assSSSS....

back to jack rackham's funtime brothel business attempt :) hes so bad at this... what the hell.... "the wRong tree" BITCH.... he is so pathetique godbless

"get your fucking house in order" MAX. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!

the . fuckign tears in Gates' eyes when Dufrene says that after this trip, Flint dies. . ajdslfhjl

ep8 flint you . flint. Flint. you fucking. YOU SADDDD PATHETICCCCCCC LITTLE MAN. NOT! GATES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not the sobbing and im sorry's and cradling his dead body in your hands. this sucks. this fucking SUCKS

i wish vane would suck some sand and die :)

john's manic smile "had to be done" you are. sssssso. YOU.

"no-man's-land. there was a time when stopping halfway across this bridge would have been unthinkable to you"

sorry to be so crude but flint's tits are fucking Humongous. Who allowed this.

s2

ep1 "but i'm the only person within a hundred miles of here who doesn't want to see you dead" hm. my god. so flint and silver, like...

"maaadam guthrie" jack <3

"so i actually have to fight him?" "WELL WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU THINK WAS GONNA HAPPEN"

"you have absolutely nothing to worry about" i doubt that, jack. but thanks

OH MY DOUBTS ARE UNFOUNDED !

flint and silver make each other worse :) yay!!!

ep2 ".. but seducing her was certainly... an interesting approach"

idk where this is going to go yet . but jack. "take our, predicament" bruh. MANN. hes so pathetic and i feel bad for him but do nottt be a dickkkkk. HE'S TALKING LEGALIZE LIKE A DICK AND JUST. TAKES THE SHOT. [DRUMROLL] READY TO LEAVE,

. JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK. "Please know that all i have ever wanted for you is to be happy. come to bed when you're through" for. REAL?????????????????? JACK MY BEST FRIEND JACK?? POLY KING..

ep4 im sorry i know theres all this war and politic intrigue happening but the . threesome morning after, jack's awkward but jovial ?? grimace at max when he's leaving the scene, ohh my god... also max being a ma'am now within the brothel❤️ and jack kissing anne's head as he rose from bed....

flint and john insane homoerotically charged conversations. always reverting back to his share of the gold huh.

ep5 miranda's actor doing SO much for big frustrated female emotions(tm)

(utterly unimpressed) "all right. what's the matter with the articles"

"so again fuck's your problem?" anne... anne your voice is like a SO~NG

"and another to tell them why they should want to do it"

ohh my god, uhhuh. Uhhuh. huh? . yeah. yeah i thought so. i mean. fuck. Wow. uhhuh. no one's spoiled me enough to prepare me for this, then, huh. james fucking flint you complicated hard-headed queer jackass of a man. your plan is bad but fuck man who am i to tell you anything

ep6 please tell me jack doesn't know how to be a sailor please please PLEWASE he is so pathetic. "listen... no women" SHUT UP!!!!

anne's stride to that man's neck to get him to spill the beans about the gold. her voice and eyes. i love you strange angry violent bisexual woman. god. you know. trauma !

thhhe fucking shadow work when small scared traumatized anne lifts her gaze to max. oh the shadow in that. MAX'S VOICE.... MAX PROMISING TO. PROTECT ANNE?? at some cost i bet.... BUT ANYWAY????

i love the fact that jack is just compleeeteely not scary intimidating or physically impressive at all. wet blanket of a man but at least he's got a brain (?) and a heart ???

ep7 max standing up for anne, both of them owing so fucking much to the other. i love how much authority max has...

oh its sooo fucking delightful how silver and flint are just. thick as thieves, suddenly, i love to fuckin see it. OK NEVER FUCKING MINDDD LMAO. but theyve still got that rappor!!! like!!! cant get rid of the other fast enough. or at all!! no matter what! tied at the ankles together!!

oh. thank. fuck max hugged her. ohh my god... and [the other lady] was so .. idk whats going on exactly but how kind of her to . come and usher anne out of the situation. you dont need to be doing this. go. HHHNNN

silver telling max about the gold >:) MAX'S SMILE. ILOVE HERRRR

hyiiii EWW THE ENDING OF THIS EPISODE... EWWWWW

ep8 "please go with him, so he doesn't get himself killed" ".. oh for fucks sake.."

the power that silver holdddds. ooohhhhhhhhh

wait HOLD UP. ? DID :) did flint kill hamilton's father for putting him in an asylum (??) am i reading this girl's tale correctly..

"for if anyone is responsible for what happened that day, it's, Me." ma'am. ily

oh god oh lord. the birds of prey over the fort. has vane Really just murdered 40 men ON HIS OWN.

ALRIGHT. YEAH. WAIT. NO. I FORGOT ABOUT THE NASTY UNPLEASANT VIBE OF THE LATEST EPISODE LOL <33

FUCK charles vane i HATE THIS BITCHHHHh EVERYTHING IS SO FUCKING DIFFICULT ALL OF THE TIME

ep9 "footrope. bitch of a spot"

"you idiots are the fucking riggers of this ship" AHSDHFJKH

oh but i thought there were two ships. one in charlestown and one at nassau. and that vane's men would yknow. be in Nassau. cuz how did they get into charlestown THIS QUICK ?

i know it's main character syndrome but man oh boy is silver good at keeping himself alive

"where are we going?" "to execute the third option"

i hate that anne has to kill :( but it is also so fucking sexy that she is so GOOD at handling a fight

fuuuuck eleanorrrrr,,, GRRRR

tjhe lingering hand hold with anne and max.... AUUUGH

the LOVE. that miranda and flint share for thomas is SO FUCKING WILD TO ME WHAT A POINT WHAT A POWER. ????

OH . SHHHHE. FUCKING. DIES??????????? JUST LIKE . THAT????????????

john's smug ass grin when vane says theyre saving flint... whaaaatttt

NOT THE AVALANCE ??????

ep10 "like we was two halves of the same thing""i can't be your wife, jack"[A TEAR FROM JACK'S EYE]"but you and i are gonna be partners til they put us in the fucking ground" HET! RIGHTS!!!!!!!!!!!

john seeing how the crew starts rising up for him.. oh the power. oh the power is DELICIOUS.

"everyone is a monster to someone. since you are so convinced that i am yours... i will be it"

"what do you suggest?" "that we remind them that they were right to be afraid" FLINT!!!!!

"where are his keys, and has he seen them since he took me away from my men" BRO. JOHN!!!!!!

oh flint is. fully gone :) kill my lover kill my wife i've HAD ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the fear the genuine guttural fucking FEAR at john's voice over the state of his leg . the crew all around him. oh this is. OH THIS IS.

point of no return.

"would you like to see something shiny?" PIRATES!!!!! WOOOO YEAHH

MAX AS THE SEASON'S FINAL FRAME ILYSM

s3

ep1 TEACH!!

"any capital sentence against a pirate would hear my answer" he's an avenging angeeeeel. OF SOME SOOORT

haircut and facial hair to show that time has passed, yes, i see

"this crew has spilled a great deal of blood to make your name what it is. it doesn't belong to you" WOW

oh. Oh! alright! jack you piece of shit huh! vane i'm sorry for my very mean words (still deserved, but you know, people, being human, piracy)

"take this, and leave me be" max.....

"jack, if i thought it gave you any pleasure, i would've killed you the moment you suggested it" goddamn. goddamn these two. fucking fuck.

season three poster kicks ASSS

ep2 "lovely. good old jack gets buried beneath a pile of rubble while you two begin a well-funded life of leisure"

"i am here in part to ensure my own future, i will not apologize for that" max you deserve eeeveeerythiiiiing

sjhaking jack and max in a bottle grr GRR they both love anne GRRRRRRRRH

"this is the second time in the last few months im facing certain death, and you are again offering moral support" "does that mean we're married?"

oh . oh :( john having to witness and hold this guy through as he's helpless and fucking drowning before his eyes. fuck tthis fucking SHOW!!!!!

i love how much this all. Affects john. he's so fuckjing sad to lose yet another of his brothers.

"just how fucking stupid, exactly, are your men" "... it's hard to say"

"... like fucking rodents, preparing for the winter"

flint's nightmares in this... ough. miranda... HAUNTING

oh fuckyes the becalming be upon us. IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS.

ep3 "no, i think we should feed some of the men and not, others" dfhjk flint flint flint flint this is FUCKED UP. BUT WHAT ELSE CAN YOU DO???? AS CAPTAIN!!!!!

jack's "[whistle] that's enough. you, sit down" charming charming guy

"though might be you're the only one who actually made a career of it" jack and anne and jack and vane and hdsfdbkjbvkvj what is this do they even like each other is this old friends is tHIS ABOUT OLD FRIENDS ???

"i think it's torture for him. and i think the only way he can imagine it stopping is when there are no more of us left to witness it" john's insight into flint.... why is he so clever about this man. huh!!!

the ghosts hunting flint❤️ oh christ i cant do this . fucking trauma. fucking piracy. fuck this noise. FUCK!!!

"if you're not strong enough to do what needs to be done, [then] i'll do it for you" flint. my man. is this a love confession (fuck no it isnt but also HM)

oh shit, oh fuck , anne and max fucking love each other. FUCK. "you should stay. to see it divided evenly" ".... i trust you" AH! HOLY! SHIT!

"i'm one of the two men who've been on full rations for the last few days. you're the other. let's go" YAY AT THIS DYNAMIC. YAY AT TRYING TO BECOME WHAT HIS BEST FRIEND AND WIFE WERE TO HIM. YAY AT THIS ENTIRE TRUST-BONDING EXPERIENCE :)!!!

fight me or kill me "or acknowledge the fact that you and i would be a hell of a lot better off as partners instead of rivals" HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!

ep4 the men shouting and lying and demanding shit outside the fortress, appealing to jack, trying to get to vane. jack point-blank shooting the guy❤️ oh my god.

fuck yes retribution by enslaved people <3 oh man. where is this going to Fucking Take Us. ethically choppy waters, black-n-white thinking, i dont fcking know

jack is . so focused on leaving a legacy...

"how much?" "... mmh !"

"i was just gonna say 'i'll see you soon', but that would probably be a lie, wouldn't it?"

"i hate to be the one to say it, but is it possible we've all missed the point of that story? they all Died."

flint and john's epic fatherhood over billy ahljsdf:djflgk

"she will not let us leave this place alive" and good for her for that

MISTER SCOTT LOVE OF MY LIFEEEEE LIGHT OF MY DAYSSSSSS YEAH YEAH !! YEHAW!!!

oh fuckers and shitheads you did not just . shoot at him. did you. im going to eat you

ep5 "so i might oversee the survival of both places outside the scrutiny of either" mr scott.......

"you should know, people do not speak to me that way anymore" max you deserve the moon and the stars. eleanor get the fuck outta here...

h e r  v o i c e  w h e n  s h e  s a y s  a n n e

scott smiling so fucking gently softly at his wife and THEN HIS DAUGHTER OUGH MAN HE'S SO..!!!! flint i swear if you fuck this up. if you get a knife on her im gonna [jsdfhmgjkfjngj]

"strange how little separates us" :( vane and that dying spanish dude talking...

"it's awful, isn't it. how the money makes sheep of us all"

max demanding herself a seat and a future. god i love you.

"and yet for some reason, right now i am bothered by it" the flint fucking curse i see

HE LEFT THE KNIFE!!! HE LEFT IT!!! THE CROWD GOES WILLLDDDD

"bring down nassau. maybe you bring it all down"

jack and his name..... ohhhh brother.

ep6 "in a few hours time, there's a good chance you're going to look awfully smart"

jack so angry and peeved and hurt-of-pride bc that english dude got the city to work and he didn't... ouhh the pride. OH WHY ARE YOU HERE YOURE GONNA GET IN TROUBLE.....

"no one prepared you for this, did they" ah the similar fates "but i know how"

"but it cannot be borne if you cannot stand"

"please understand i'm quite particular about my library"

"to have been a partner to him in this way" the homoerotic subtext mmmhh-hm!

"you don't think i can convey a thought to Anne comprehensible only to her? a thought as simple as 'run'?" ;_; BRUH,,, he's ready to . Not let Nassau be 'english' and for anne to have a chance out NO MATTER WHAT THE COSTTTTT

"english it will not be" or however the quote went..... badass... fuck yehaw.....

scott and his daughter ,,, scott continues to be so. fucking loving father to her despite the great gulf between  them :( MANNNN

FUCK! ROGERS!!!!!!!!!!!

ep7 jesussss this plan is big and dangerous🙂

yes yess YES YES YESSSS THE DAUGHTER GETS ON THE BOAT!!!!!!!!! please tell me her name next. ffs.

billy taking her hand and helping her onto the ship COOL SHOT !!

".. but this battle is ours as much as yours. my word and your will govern in consort or not at all. and when i'm not present, that word shall be given by my daughter" POWER TO WOMEN!!!!!!!!

"we're all villains in nassau. don't think cuz youre new youre any different"

fuck :) now they gotta give jack as well as the gold. max is so pissed abt this. she gave anne her WORD.

i love that she had power and say over white men now. btw. love this flavor.

HER NAME IS MADI. BTW. THANK YOUU

"i understand this is the place cowards come to beg forgiveness from a king"

"captain flint is dead" "not anymore he's not" HE GOT BETTER

ohhhh ffffuuuuuck did silver just. kick glasses-guy's head in with his peg leg. ohh Brother.

"my name is john silver. and i've got a long, fucking memory"

flint coming to ask silver "are you alright?" after this all :)c not to be annoying. but im gonna be annoying. these two fucking guys <3

flint talking about both miranda and thomas this episode i love bisexuality

"... and spiteful to anyone who would find.. Happiness, under her rule" AFTER REFERRING TO THE FACT THAT BOTH THOMAS AND MIRANDA WERE KILLED FOR THE FIGHT FOR THE PARDONS ETC. WOW!!!!

vane and jack and anne and max polycube of all time. at this current moment just the three of them at all actively but it still stands.

ep8 anne and flint discussing routes. vane is there too. vane is playing with some tea cup. gets his finger slightly stuck on the ear--

"don't despair, some other poor bastard'll take my place soon enough" jack..... the RAT......

"there's a whole world out there, that ever so often rewards ambition"

"this does not seem like release"

"one waits for mr de groot to finish speaking, frowns thoughtfully, and then repeats phonetically what he said to the men"

"the depths of my ignorance on the subject" oooh yes. oh YES. learning the job. ON THE FLY.

he and madi have an interesting thing going on :) they should be friends i think

i really dont care for eleanor anymore. like good for her for girlbossing her own way but ohhhh stay away from max thaaaanks

ok sorry yeah i do like it when she's cussing men out its good its fantastic

the fucking spiderweb of people and relations and ideals and pride and trust and power and dsshfkdjfgkj

"for reasons passing understanding, mr dobbs still has a number of friends on this crew" fuck dobbs but FUCK this line is funny

madi :(....

jack is the son of a long line of tailors omg...

"but jesus did i make up a lot of ground to catch you"

anne clambering into the wreckage to kiss jack square on the lips hello............ "ow" HELLO

vane jack and anne "right behind us" vane's INSANE fucking stare at flint as he says "yeah" GOOD STUFF

i mean im not trying to sell the polycule but uuuhhhhoooohhhgh vane helping jack out of the carriage.. that hold is GOOOOOODDD

vane's NOT ABOUT TO FUCKING DIE RIGHT NOW. IS HE. I JUST STARTED TO LIKE HIIMMMM

ep9 "charles vane's death is inside that box. along with my good name. along with her lost love. along with your late quartermaster's life." holy fucking shit speak UP jack oh i LOVE THIS. oh my godddddd

"that, or he doesn't know how to say no to the both of us at the same time" flint and silver parents of all time

"... it could be catastrophic" "HE KNOWS." JOHN'S FACE HEREEE

"if you have something to add you should just fucking say it"

"i can't tell if this was a warning, or a welcome" WELCOME!!!!!! WELCOME TO H E L L ! ! !

madi hugging john OH GOD. OH THE . GHRGHGGRHG THERES A TRUST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"get on with it motherfucker" oh fuck me i really like vane actually. he's not gonna fucking DIE, HAHA, THAT WOULD BE . WRONGGGG

huh. well this fucking hurt actually. gol d roger ass move btw. FUCK THIS SUCKS ACTUALLY!!!!!!

jack taking on vane's mantle . my teeth are gonna be ground clean off with the way im clenching my jaw right now. fffuck me this episode was pretty rough after all

eleanor guthrie youre a fantastic character i hope you also get whats coming to you❤️

hello mr teach and your sad little camp.... dad's about to be fucking furious about a certain someone's hanging.... "what do you want to do about it?" and the movement of his eye.... GIRL WHAT DO YOU THINK HE WANTS TO DO ABOUT IT

ep10 "the irony wasn't lost on either of us"

"but the one in whose name this war is to be fought... it is still a stranger to me" oh Words. also flint's stare in this moment mmmmmwah!!

"and given how much we have sacrificed to earn this battle, how can we do anything other but to see it through. my friend may have given his life to earn this battle"

flint sacrificed fifty of his men in a senseless massacre just to entice the english to chase after him.......... bitch this fucking MAN.

blackbeard coming to avenge his SONNNN and also jack closing his eyes to take in the news of charles' death oh my GOD

he is. so righteously PEEVED at eleanor over what happened to charles oh my god.....

BTW really very good hair insp from jack here. around 19minutes to the ep

"... once our relationship had been exposed, defiled, scandalized... everything ended"

"england was broken, and that sooner or later a good man must resist it" BRO. BRRRRROOO

flint's voice and face during this conversation haHa. haha ha ha. Ha., huh.

john..... partners and trust and dying 'for' flint ghngrhg

"there may be no one in the world closer to you than i am" THIS IS . INSANE. INSANE!!!!!!!

"i think he feels shame. for having disappointed me. and a great need to redeem himself in my eyes"

"but among them is the sincere confusion as to why charles invested any time and energy in you" BECAUSE THEYRE FRIENDS!!!! DAMNIT!!!!!!!!!!

"there wasnt any more to that thought, was there" JACK YOU LOSER....

"to be underestimated is an incredible gift"

"someone better suited to do what must be done" madi's so fucking cool and i would lay down my life for her .

"see you on the other side" "always." fuck will and elizabeth actually these are my emotional support straights (not straight). also jack just called charles their brother im going to dshfjkdbgjkhjhklfdg

oh i love comedy. blackbeard's ship getting shot at and jack faltering in his step, while Teach. Literally Just Stands there. giving him the eye. Jack trying to gather himself. lmao

"TELL YOUR GOVERNOR. YOU TELL HIM I'M COMING" YAAAAYYY

"but in terms of out future and the danger that you believe you may pose to me, bear this in mind. I've survived starvation, a tempest, pirate hunters, jealous captains, mutinous crews, angry lords, a queen, a king, and the goddamn british navy." the rest of that quote. THE SCENE WHERE THEYRE LOOKING AT EACH OTHER OVER THE BODY OF WATER. WOW!!! FLINT'S SMILE IN THE FLASHBACK. WOW!!!!!!!

"but that name isnt doing anything for us. see about that"

cant fucking describe how insanely fun it is to me that the crew at nassau are creating a myth, a man out of thin air, to serve as the poster boy for their efforts or whatnot. this is the Neatest fucking thing. WHAT the hell.

best fucking thing to have max be in these season finale final shots so often

THE LETTER. MADMEN, RICH MEN, TYRANTS AND KING. THE TABLE!!!!

s4

ep1 "if it makes you feel any better, i havent considered killing you in months" aw he cares ❤️

also hhhiiiih the opening sequence underwater stuck in that ladder thingie :) yikes!!

MADI HOT AS HELL.

"today there will be vengeance for the death of charles vane" JAAAACKKKKK

THE REVENGE :)<3

oh that was. a nasty fucking trick, the barricade whatever. oh fuck me.

OH FUCK MEEEE flint i cant believe you'd leave silver on his oWN OH NNNO. and madi's reaction as well oh no....

"i dont know. got to make this" girl this is . So.

im still wondering about max and eleanor's roles in all this. who will max side with. No one? herself. is eleanor actually This, Now. after all That? shes the most selfish mf (honorific) that im finding this all Very difficult to swallow

flint telling madi how it seems that silver and her have become 'friends'.... "he is my friend, too" i see. I See.

MR. FEATHERSTONE DO NOTTTTTTT TRIFLE ME RIGHT NOW. BE. FOR REAL.

no no nnno not mister de groot :(

"there will be no pirate King here. of that much i am certain" GO GIRL!!!!!!!!! I SUPPORT THIS

ep2 "i gave you a life, and you repaid me by conspiring with my enemies" MAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh NO???

aah, good ol sexism on the high seas. whats teach's fucking issue with anne.

madi has the fucking, CLASS and SWAG of a chAMPION. TALK BACK TO FLINT MORE!!! ILOVE THIS FLAVOR

israel fucking hands lmsjkdfglfk i fucking knew it was fking waiting for the name to drop i cant fucking, believe this

i love this, when john is spinning this tale about himself, i dont know if he believes any of it himself, whether he's so deep in the lie just to get out of a bad situation, is this where his heart actually lies. i love this. myth of a man. "now i am here". like some goddamned god

"at a certain point there is a good chance he'll just decide to kill you than take your no for an answer" "he can try" anne loml loml loml

"now that we're here, it'd be so easy. and i don't wanna do it"

[looks at the camera] oh. i Love Infighting.

"someone who shared anne's mistrust of sentimentality" anne and charles bff's for REAL.....

oh fuck off fuck me, teach's memory of charles and that bird and what it might mean, "dinner" fuuuuck meeeeeeeeeeee this FUCKING gUY

max is so tired of this fucking situationnnn but she has some sense of moralityYYY oh my god this tangle of WEBSSSS

john just lost a friend in max :(

ep3 max's voice when she's angry... loml

"the empire survives in part because we believe its survival to be inevitable. but it isn't. and they know that. that's why they're so terrified of you and i" flint and madi bestfriendism arc begins Now

wait this occurred to me out of nowhere as jack is pondering about his future status and whether he's gonna be blackbeard's equal one day. oh are these daft bastards all doomed by the narrative. cuz of the history thing. idk  what happened in nassau, historically speaking, but is this whole entire endeavor gonna end Bad for them. oh no. OH NNNNO

madi YOUR EYES. OH THE TEARS

"do i need to run?" "that'd be fun for me to see. how would you do it?" "with great difficulty, i imagine"

this episode is paced and shot in the most . bizarre fucking manner. why does this look and feel like a relationship drama or a cheap version of one.

"i did not fail to do it. i refused to do it and would again"

teach offering that shithead rogers a tight lipped smile while he's captured. ok blackbeard you have rights

oh. oh they fucking killed. huh. teach is fucking dead, then. fuck rogers fuck him entirely what the fuck is this dudes deal

ep4 flint saying "our shared authority" like a . fucking confession. oh my God.

"a lot of them end up that way too. though i admire your optimism" AND THE WAY FLINT LOOKS AT HIM. THIS IS INSANE ON THE BRAIN

silver's personal vendetta against billy. <3 flint and silver sharing the mantle of Captain(tm) <33

"i think we all agree that it helps none of us to have those idiots armed to the teeth" "... yeaH"

this john billy flint + max conflict is so interesting. oh my god it's so . HM!!

"any man" "absolutely -- absolutely not" LET ANNE FIGHT FFS !!!!!

"anne get up" her hands. fully open. bleeding down to the bone now,

JACK JACK JACK MY BELOVED RACKHAM

"that i would have had to live with it" max is not a killer ohhh she's got the sensibilities of a human-person still when everyone else is ready to reign bloody murder upon anyone who crosses them ohhhhhhhhh

"do i need to be concerned that you took almost two hours to tell me about it?"

i know i know i know its about miranda (and thomas) but mostly miranda i know i know but fuck man fuuuuuuck when john tells flint that madi is the person who makes him the most vulnerable and flint is spacing out after it. dude. FUCK. but also uhhhhhh UHHHHHHH this could be. Bad❤️ flint is. NOT a good person. HHHHHHH

"wouldn't you trade it all to have thomas hamilton back again" HUUUUUUUUUH ? OH I DID NOT EXPECT US TO GO /HERE/ ACTUALLY

the way flint's face is twitching. sir toby stephens THANK YOU

"i suppose the good news is that's how we'll know we're finally getting somewhere interesting" AND THE SAD SMIRK AT THE END OFTHISSSS

fuck eleanor but the look she grants flint before the gate closes. damn.

eleanor i am sooooooo sick and tired of your shhhhit leave max ALONE <333333

ep5 eleanor's handmaiden lady is quite brave actually, to trust her word and go out to the wolves like this

billy is so. Baffled. this actor is really fun in this kinds of emotion

john trusts flint.... or at least. he is trying to convince billy that he does.....

ok this is Quite fucking fascinating actually. this Quarrel-type a beat between rogers and eleanor

i.... dont,,,, care for eleanor getting all emotional about madi and her mom and mr scott. dude. get real.

LOVE the way flint says "i'm not concerned" in regards to the change in plans (cache, and john)

sucha fucking powerful frame when flint and co. come from that tunnel and madi with her men are there <3

"HE just Said it."

"all it guarantees is we no longer have the cache that we all agreed was Critical" I LOVE THAT JACK IS SO. PRACTICAL AND SMART...

WHERES ANNE.

eleanor's commanding officer or whatever . his face when looking through the looking-glass and max asks him what he sees. priceless.

ep6 yes yes yes madi, stomp on those white girl feelings. FUCK eleanor

"'this deal'? as in the one in which you walk away with all My mOnEy?"

"i did not want this" :-(

"thats the power youve given me" oh, BILLY. YOU SHOT YOURSELF IN THE LEG WITH THIS CHOICE !!!

billy's vendetta against flint, wanting to see him dead...... silver asking him to stop it/be over it...............

max and jack, hm, not friendship necessarily. but the General Understanding between them. at times. yeah.

MAX AND ANNE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"i loved you. and i betrayed you. but i cannot apologize for it" ... "and i do not wish to lie to you ever again" MAX. GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOUR VOICEEEEE

did madi just. fucking die.

oh. shit. did eleanor fucking die also.

everythings. COMING UP, FLINTHOUSE,

flint's face acting once again, now that he's telling silver about the. Hnghn. situation. oh god.

"anyone who can't make it to the beach, i want them carried. i'll not leave anyone behind"

"how can we all have sacrificed so much and none of us has anything to show for it?" oh i get it now i get it . max isthe fucking insightful oracle or smth like that of the series. she's always on all sides and on her own side, selfish and giving and caring and loyal and scheming. oh she. Oh She.

"... and the governor is sitting in Nassau in mY ffFFUcking chair, victorious !!!"

this spat jack and max are having. Oh Man. i revisit my earlier statement. I LOVE THEIR DYNAMIC????

"youre goddamn right i do"

"eleanor is dead, anne is nearly dead, and i want him to pay for all of it dearly" this is not the point but hoooooohhhhmy god if anyone suggests that this woman is bisexual rather than a lesbian im going to [choking noises. but humorously]

oh this shall be. Really Good. <- scene opens of silver lookng Fhucking worse for wear and red-teary-eyed. and flint's opening the captain's door

ep7 "she was curious and strong, not made to be hidden away from the world" THIS SUCKS. SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

flint asking "how are you" from silver...... hngnh. theres something so genuine in his voice in this. and in silver's eyes. oh fuck fuck fuck this

"they call you king, but only in the kingdom that is no more. we're all free men here, and i wish to Stay that way."

MAX FUCKING LOVES ANNE. LOOK AT THOSE LINGERING GLANCES FROM THE DOOR. FUCK!!!!!!!! FUCK ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"you told her to fuck off. she listened" IM SO SAD

jack's funy little breakdown over the whatever-fees like. bruh. this is SO domestic

jack's got the energy of a single father of four, methinks.

"when i was drowning myself over miranda, you helped me find my way out. Look at me. I will do the same for you"

"charles vane was my closest friend in the world" bruh............. JACK....................... BRO!....................

eleanor's grandmother's actor hello hello hello. Hello

hyii vittuuUUU the dead eleanor having moved her gaze towards rogers in his minds eye eeewwwwWW CREEPS ME OUT

"they are strong when flint and silver are united, but separate the two of them, turn them against one another and their world collapses" JESSUS THE CODEPENDENCY THE ISSUES THE . WOW!!!!!!!!!!!

BITCH. BITCH ??????????????????????????? BGIHNTUTDBGJK H:)DFGFNK MADI IS ALIVE?????????????? FLINT WHAT DID YOU . DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i think max is the only character in this show actually. thats what i think actually.

oh fuck Oh fuckkkk silver looks like a drowned cat when he realizes that flint and the queen are not... in favor of. getting madi ? oh goddddddddddddd

".. to divide us like this, i will not permit it,  MADI, would not permit it..."

flint is like. RIDE OR DIE. for silver rightnow about madi. i respect this i like this this feels like an insane person thing in its entirety this is so good to me

"when you and i are of the same mind there is nothing we have not yet been able to do" and then he kinda Smiles. at silver. flint youre Insane.

ROGERS CAN SUCK SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

madi is so fucking through with this shes angry and tired and powerful and everythign and she will also die fighting i Hope this iSnt Foreshadowing🙂

"i mean, how could you be someone who would do that?" aint that thefucking question

"i do it for us. thats how it started. thats how its going to end" DID JACK FUCKING RACKhAM JUST INVENT. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVEEEEEEEEEE ? ?

"you'll. you know." "i will" bro they. they both love anne like crazy. they dont love each other they kinda despise/respect/pity each other but By Golly Gee God They Both Love This Woman and Will Put Aside All Arguments For Her SAKE

ISRAEL HANDS ARE YOU A LITTLE WEASEL BITCH IN THIS UNIVERSE ALSO!!!!!!!!!?????????

ep8 "right people ... to hold the world together while it finds its balance" "you think so much of what you and i can accomplish together -" "you and her." OH MY GOD????

"i think that you are the best of us" AND I THINK THAT THIS IS A LOVE CONFESSION. UNLESS????

a cold winter's niiiight. HEALING ONE'S WOUNDSSSSS. MAX AND ANNE!!!!!

oh the trust is so fuckingbroken. between max and anne. between silver and flint... jhessus the stare flint offers silver after the cache is revealed. FUCK.

ooooh the lady of the brothel and the lady in waiting and JACK JACK JACK

dads are. FIGHTING.

"but do not ask me to choose between a war, and a wife. i do not think youre going to like the answer"

"... but i demand your support. [...] do i have it?" [LONG ASS BEAT] "yes." HE SAID, YOU KNOW. !!!! LIKE A LIAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"but max refused" BUT MAX REFUSED. BUT MAX. REFUSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"she's a breath away from winning that fight. for whatever reason, she wants to share the spoils with you" IM GOING TO SPILL OVER IM GOING TO DROWN IN A PUDDLE IM GOING TO GNAW ON MY HANDBONES AND TURN INTO A FLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

no no no noNO NO NO!! SHES BEEN FIGHTING THIS WORLD EVERY DAY SINCE SHE WAS BORN!!! DO NOT!!! MARRY HER OFF!!!! TO SOME WHITE MALE DIMWIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

youre forcing her to sell herself again, to be someone else's to belong to someone who does not deserve her nor her affections, to hide behind a white man, im not angry at the show or the writers i am thrilled to witness this fiction but FOR FUCKSSSS SAKEEEEEE THE STORY OHMY GOD!!!!! SHE IS THE CENTRAL PIECE!!!! TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"that... is a Very oldman"

silver still making sure. that no one does harm to flint. he fucking trusts that man. oh i am in so So much danger

"it's a fucking mess out here, come inside" ANNE. YOU AND YOUR WAYS!!!

SHE SAID NO SHE SAID NO SHE SAID NO SHE SAID NO!!!!! I LOVE YOU MAX!!! DO NOT GIVE THEM AN INCH. GIRL YOURE MY EVERY.THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING

"... because i refuse to situate a man in a position where he might interfere one day with my ability to repair things with you"

"you are the bravest ... the truest .... and i betrayed you [her voice breAKS] and it sickens me" IM IN THE FUCING TRENCHES.

"for failing to see there's nothing important that does not include you"

hey yo <3 the hurt and . tears in silver's eyes as he watches flint Fucking betray him. after everything. after all. burrowing mmy head in sand right now effective immediately. i hate this. I HATE THISSS. he's not gonna trust flint EVER again about ANYTHING, and flint is SO. he is SO GOING TO END UP LONELY FRIENDLESS ALL HIS CLOSEST COMPANIONS AND LOVERS AND PARTNERS  D E A D  BECAUSE THEY HAD THE MISFORTUNE OF EXISTING A HAIRS WIDTH TOO CLOSE TO HIM. HATE PREVAILS LOVE LOSES FUCK MY STUPID BAKA LIFE

ep9 "after i just climbed that fucking hill are you being serious right now?" heh. COMEDY.

god the fucking. gentle grins and smirks they share . to let pride get between them... and then they did. let it get there. right. i hate this show (i LOVE THIS SHOW???)

TALKIONIG ABOUT. LEARNIGN HOW TO DEFEAT YOU . :) THE GENTLE SMIRKS CONTINUE OHMYGODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD THIS IS AGONIZING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"on his own and disadvantaged countless times since i've known him... and here we are"

"i wonder if he knows just how much youve learned from him" ENDME.

we dont know who silver is.

"i'd be forced to hesitate before doing you any harm" hes putting silver in the same line as thomas and miranda.

"no seriously ive got quite a lot riding on this" JACKKKK

is this fucking bitch rogers blaming . MADI. of all people for eleanor death im going to k*ll this man

OK FAIR THE KNITTING NEEDLES CLICKING ELEANOR'S GHOST THING IS PRETTY EFFECTIVE

"i must answer to them" and "MY war." madi. fuckingchrist girl.

"THAT. YOU did." MADI RIP HIM TO SHREEEDDSSSSSS

flint bodily regretting his choice of companion as this guy will not fkcing Shut UP.

FLINT STILL. idk if this is care or plotting. BUT HE DOESNT WANT TO PART FROM SILVER

"that is to say you know my genuine friendship, and loyalty" im. going. to . scream

"can that be enough and there still be trust between us?" IM. GOING TO. SCREAM!

irrelevant to everything going on but my god the way flint is build. i'd like to look like this man thanks! gender OUTTTA the wazoo

THE OLD MAN LEADING JACK JUST FUCKING . DIED????????? NATURAL CAUSES?????? WHY ARE JACK'S STORYLINES ALWAYS COMEDIES IM LOSING MY MIND

THE THREE "mm-hmm's" JESUS

if flint fucking kills joji right now i will not be a happy camper i swear

god fucking fuck.

"it would be preferable to me if we solved this another way" AND WHY DO I STILL BELIEVE HIM!!!!!

"i know you cannot see why this must be. but it must be"

LIKE WAIT A MOMENTTTT silver i love your drive and love for your wife its only right <3 but fooor fucksake madi MADI HERSELF. ON THE ENEMY SHIP. is ACTIVELY SPITTING IN ROGERS FACE AND SAYING yeah whatre you gonna do kill me do it coward AND SHES LOOKING FORWARDDDD. PLEASE GIVE HER THE COURTESY OF DOING THE SAME.

mr de groot. i fucking despise the english.

"i have his true friendship, and so he's going to have mine" bruh.

ep10 ok i said i wouldnt comment on the last ep as i was watching but here me out. i hate that theres no fondness between them, at least not the sort that you(as a watcher?) can Reliably trust upon. its all just politics and selfish wants and needs and the flotsam and dead bodies that happen around you as you strive towards your goal. i hate that i cant trust jack!! and that flint cant trust jack!! and silver cant trust either of them!!! fuck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

. : D MOTHERFUCKER ALRIGHT !

[sugaredoleander]

for the record, i think there's been 27-29 total. did a recount and found a few more. which would make 6 this year just a bit less than quarter. more than a fifth

in that 29, i do specifically mean fictional couples, and i'm counting these 6, nomi and amanita (sense8), callie and arizona (grey's anatomy), kelly and yorkie (black mirror), freya and keelin (the originals), nina and dre (the chi), brittany and santana (glee), ruby and sapphire (steven universe), lindsay and melanie (queer as folk), lena and stef (the fosters, being generous and counting this one twice because they technically did get married twice), alex and piper (orange is the new one. again, being generous and counting this one because it's technically not a legal marriage but it is a wedding), bianca and reese (all my children), julia and mariana (las aparicio), florence and jazmin (las estrellas), anne and ann (gentleman jack. again, generous with this one, it's not a legal marriage but also what are you going to do in the 1800s?), dani and jamie (bly manor. this one is a stretch. again, i'm giving it a pass because of the era but this one is a real stretch, and you could definitely argue it doesn't count), miranda and faith (one red nose day and a wedding), carol and susan (friends) (this is the first one, in 1996. i'm relatively sure all the others are after 2000)

there's more wlw on tv that are Married but i'm counting actual weddings (and a few wedding-adjacent era-specific-alternatives) here. if you know of any others, let me know!!

but i do think this is the count. in 1996 we went from none to one, in the first two decades of the 21st century we got another 22, of those TWO in the first decade, 2002 and 2009. and then in 2021 we've gotten 6!! that's genuinely a lot. that's genuinely progress.

2021 said the girls are getting married!!

[anaveragebibliophile]

All For Him

Young!Legolas x Thranduil x Wife!Reader 

Summary: Lord Elrond comes to Mirkwood to ask a favor of his oldest friend, Thranduil. However, the stoic, unyielding king isn’t as willing to follow through on the request because of the danger it will put his family in. 

Honestly, when you stumbled into your husband’s study that morning, you didn’t expect to feel so puzzled and flabbergasted. You didn’t anticipate Thran’s summons to be anything more than a request for information about Legolas (which you were happy to provide), a question regarding supper, or an idea for date night. So the last person you expected to see was Lord Elrond, the ruler of Rivendell, arguing with his trusted confidant and friend of many eons near the balcony. 

“Thran, what’s going on? Is everything alright?” you queried as you stepped into the room, incisors biting into your lower lip. 

“Queen (y/n), what a pleasant surprise,” Lord Elrond replied, consequently ending the argument, as he walked over to take your wrist and place a chaste, respectful kiss on the back of your hand. “My sincerest apologies for not seeking you out sooner.” 

“That’s quite alright, Elrond. You know that. I too wish I had known you were here earlier, but I unfortunately got sidelined. We took a short walk in the gardens this morning, all three of us, when Legolas ended up tripping on a very small rock. Thranduil and I tried to utilize the open--and what we thought was a safe--space as a way for him to grow more comfortable walking without our help. That strategy worked well for us. Until today. None of us had seen the ant-sized pebble roll over his tiny heel, making him lose his balance and unknowingly place his hand on a grounded bee’s stinger to stabilize himself.” 

“My goodness! How is he doing?”

“As well as can be expected. As he got himself up, he whimpered a little bit which isn’t normally like him. Even if he takes a tumble, he’ll usually still maintain his normal demeanor--sweet, timid, and smiley. But once we saw his palm start to swell up, we knew something was wrong. Thran rushed him to the healer, who was more than willing to keep an eye on him. Ever since then, he’s been given herbs to reduce the swelling and irritation at the site of the wound as well as water to keep him hydrated. Thank you for asking.”

Once you finished sharing that traumatizing experience, you looked over to your husband, whose face was devoid of color. Out of the two of you, he had been the most panicked over Legolas’ well-being. ‘Is he breathing?’ he’d asked. ‘What if he has a reaction to the toxins?’ he’d wondered. ‘What if we didn’t get him to the healer’s quarters in time?’ he’d said, voice cracking under all the emotions. Unfortunately, the man is an aggressive worrier who feels the most stress when he’s involved in a situation that’s completely out of his control. His son inadvertently getting stung by a bee? Yeah, definitely an event that drove your husband up a wall. 

“He’s doing fine, Thran. He and I cuddled in his rocking chair for about twenty minutes before he fell asleep. Before that though, he did want me to tell you that he loves you,” I said, trying to soothe him as best as I could given the circumstances. 

Even though Legolas is still quite young and not fluent in Sindarin yet, he does have a few sentences that he likes to use every now and again. His favorite though is ‘gi melin’, the Sindarian version of ‘I love you’. Anytime he’s reunited with you or Thran, he’ll smile so wide (with his one tooth showing itself off) and almost shout the words out (as if you won’t hear him clearly without that extra pizzaz). Both you and your husband agree that it’s probably the sweetest thing your little leaf has ever done (and Legolas is the epitome of sweet). 

“I love him too. More than life. Which is why I cannot allow Sauron’s ring and its company to enter Mirkwood. I am sorry, Elrond, but my answer is final. You will not be able to change my mind on the subject,” your husband said. 

“Sauron’s ring? So young Frodo is alive then, is he not? I heard about your daughter saving him from the hands of the Nazgûl but wasn’t sure of its veracity,” you mentioned.  

“Yes. He is recovered and wishes to continue on the quest to destroy the ring at Mount Doom. However, we are trying to avoid the company’s traveling in the open at night and are looking for places for them to seek refuge. I am trying to convince Thranduil to offer his kingdom, but it seems that that has been more difficult than I originally presumed. He fears for your safety and Legolas’ too much.” 

Speaking of Legolas, a soft knock on the door soon presented you with the little leaf in the arms of his nanny, Elva. 

“Legolas, darling, what are you doing up so early?” I asked, my lips perking up into a small grin. 

“Ada, Nana!” he blubbered, pointing to us. “Gi melin, gi melin, gi melin.”

“I apologize, Your Majesties. As you can see, the prince woke up a bit early from his nap. All of the maids attempted to keep him occupied in his chambers, but it was no use. He only wanted to see his nostairi (parents),” Elva explained. 

“That is quite alright, Elva. I have not seen enough of him today. Thank you for bringing him to us,” your husband responded, moving over as Legolas reached out for him, and, once in his arms, began snuggling into his chest. “Hello, iôn nîn. I hope you slept well.”

“How’s his hand, Thran?” 

Your husband took your question as an opportunity to lightly pull Legolas’ right arm out from where it was hiding in front of his stomach. “It is still a tad swollen but not too severe.” 

You let out a sigh of relief. “That’s good to hear.” 

“Nana, gi melin,” your son whispered behind your husband’s robes. 

“Oh, my sweet boy,” you responded, lightly running your fingers through his hair and down his back. 

Watching the interaction ensue, Thranduil softly smiled down at the two loves of his life. The first one--his wife--who taught him the beauty behind exuding kindness, positivity, and light. The one who guided him back to the meaning of life. And the second one--his son--who embodies all the genuine goodness that his wife bestowed upon him in their early years together. He’ll never know how he got so lucky, but that unknown answer will never prevent him from being grateful. 

“Ada, gi melin,” your son quietly hummed as he lifted himself up to kiss Thran’s cheek. 

“Iôn nîn, gi melin as well. Very much.”

But then the unthinkable happened. Your little leaf turned his body away from Thranduil to look at Elrond. “Gi melin!” he shouted, a smile creeping up his face (with his lone tooth on display). 

“Well, I cannot say I am not shocked,” the lord responded, just as confounded as the rest of the group. Although Legolas was a very empathetic elfling, the reality was that he only shared that sentence with two people: his parents. So his sharing that sentiment with another-- a person he doesn’t spend every day with, let alone see once a month--was very odd, yet exciting in its own way. In your mind, maybe this was a sign that he was feeling more comfortable around his parents’ trusted friends. Maybe he saw the camaraderie in the room and felt soothed by it. Maybe he was no longer experiencing such debilitating episodes of timidity.   

“It appears he has taken a strong liking to you, Elrond,” you responded. “And now that you know the depth of his affections, are you truly going to permit an evil, dark presence permeating Mirkwood’s halls?”

He pondered that question in no time at all before saying, “No. I will not be the one to put this child at risk. Perhaps Frodo and his company can stay a few extra days at Rivendell. It really is not a problem.” 

At that declaration, you and Thranduil humbly nodded (hiding your smiles as best you could because this was a serious matter after all). “Thank you, my friend. Your concern for our son is much appreciated and will never be forgotten.”

“I know you would have done the same for me had I been in your shoes. Legolas deserves to be safe and comforted in his own kingdom without his parents having to worry about whether the ring will wreak havoc and harm him in the process. Besides, I want to return to Mirkwood in a few months’ time and still be on his list of love.” And everyone, including Legolas, giggled at that. 

[hoe-doroki]

On the Job pt. 2

minors do not interact

warnings: 18+, fuck or die sex pollen (which means there are noncon/dubcon elements), reader is a sex worker, masturbation, face fucking, temperature play, (light) pain play, biting

pairing: todoroki x fem!reader

wc: 3.4k

summary: Super human society has a secret. Aphrodisiac quirks aren’t just the things of porn and fantasy–they’re actually quite common and too often fall into the wrong hands. Heroes, of course, do the best that they can, but when they get hit, they must be taken off the line of duty and someone needs to be able to activate the quirk’s release condition. If they’re single, who might that someone be? Obviously, you.

a/n: Half of me didn’t actually think that I would follow up part one, but I feel a heavy obligation towards my fanfic promises so...this is a weight off my shoulders, lol.

edit: I no longer write x reader but here’s my old masterlist - mobile | desktop

You’d gotten the call early today.

Not early in the day—truth be told, you’d hardly known what time it was before picking up the phone. No, you got the call early. As in not last minute. The call saying that your client would have to be transported to the agency from on site and they could tell you the details in the meantime.

The call saying you’d better drive to the agency, because you had to service a hero in an hour.

Now, patience wasn’t usually your virtue of choice—actually you didn’t often tend towards virtues in general. Save perhaps for kindness, which you preferred to deal out on your knees or your back, augmented by praise and the generosity of offering all three of your holes for your clients’ needs. But you were happy to cultivate it today, because an early call meant one thing.

You knew who was coming today.

Your pants were already off and you shirt was pushed up over your breasts as you leisurely played with yourself. You’d licked the tips of your fingers and gotten them started with slow passes over your clit, the other hand pinching your nipple, just a little too hard in prep for a hero who’d probably give it to you rough.

Maybe your reaction wasn’t right. Maybe it wasn’t kind of you to be so relaxed—relaxed and eager, actually—over the news that it was possible that Pro Hero Shouto would die. That he’d been hit with the particularly high stakes brand of aphrodisiac quirk and that if you didn’t trigger the release condition—that was: hot and heavy sex—his heart may very well stop or whatever happened on the other side of these troublesome quirks.

You wouldn’t know. After all, you hadn’t lost a single client yet.

So perhaps that was cold of you. Perhaps it would be more virtuous for you to be worried about him, fretting on the other side of the door with the guards over his ETA.

Then again, as stated: you’d never been one for virtue. Sin was much more fun. And surely it was better to make sure that whenever Shouto did show up, you had a wet pussy that he could waste none of his precious time sinking his cock into.

You groaned at the thought, dipping two fingers from your clit into your cunt and scissoring them. Your head lolled back against the pillows, eyes fluttering closed as you pressed against that front wall the flats of your fingertips, feeling that soppy wetness covering you and beginning to drip down your knuckles.

Yeah, you were ready for him.

In fact, you’d been waiting for Shouto longer than just today. After nabbing the number two pro hero, Dynamight, a few months back, you’d gone ahead and debased yourself  further—how much further was there to go, though, really?—by creating a list of your dream clients. You’d written Dynamight just to check him off, the memory of him cumming in you raw and licking you clean still hot between your thighs.

Your near encyclopedic knowledge of heroes—naturally, you took a healthy interest in your job—had then led you to daydream about Dynamight’s whole hero cohort. You added Red Riot to the list, dreaming of his abs, imagining riding them, teasing sweet whines out of him before backing up and dropping yourself on his cock. You thought of Deku, what it would mean for your ego to nab the number one hero, the flash of jealousy that would rise on his face when you let it slip that you’d already fucked his biggest rival, fucked his goddamn brains out and yours to boot.

Of course, you couldn’t do that. NDAs, after all. You’d already signed away your rights to mentioning anything about what happened to or with Shouto today. Still, you could dream.

Then, of course, your thinking had truly devolved, and you’d thought about the boys being paired up, fighting a villain with an unknown quirk only to be hit by the ever common, ever unknown—thanks to you and your prudence; oops, there was another virtue—aphrodisiac quirk and having to take care of both of them. Spit-roassting, Eiffel Tower, a goddamn daisy chain—anything. Long story short, you’d ended up cumming twice more on your hands before the evening was done.

But also on that list, was Shouto Todoroki.

Who, if you weren’t mistaken, was now on the other side of the door.

After all, these walls weren’t soundproof. It provided quite the show for the lucky guards on the other side, but hey, if you needed to scream for help, they had to be there. By the same coin, you could hear the shuffling on the other side, the footsteps approaching, and the telltale sound of the lock on the door being activated. You pressed your legs together, resting them to the side, hiding your glistening pussy artfully with your legs for the sake of modesty. Everyone knew what was happening here, but you didn’t need to send Shouto’s poor handler back blushing to their colleagues.

Shouto was ushered into the room and, without eye contact, someone yelled to you, “Ready, ma’am?”

“Ready!” you called back, and the door was closed, leaving you alone with the number three hero.

Without modesty, your legs fell open, revealing the mess you’d already made of yourself to Shouto. You dipped the fingers you’d been using into your mouth, and cleaned them dutifully. After all Shouto was still wearing his costume, and you did so hate the agency having to send those to the cleaners with your fluids all over them.

“Hey, bud,” you purred, running a hand slowly up one thigh. “I heard you have a problem.”

Pro Hero Shouto was known for his stoic personality. News conferences and interviews he participated in always consisted of a slow, even tone, and little beyond cold facts. There was something pleasantly mysterious about that, sure, but it didn’t exactly hint that he’d be quick to jump into bed. Sexy voice, though.

But whatever quirk he’d been hit with must have been strong, because the next thing you knew, the index finger from his left hand was tracing down the front of his uniform, cleanly burning a line straight to his already tented crotch. His accessories had already been taken off—his belt, gloves, shoes, even the clasp at his neck had been undone earlier. So there was nothing in his way as he pulled either side of his scorched uniform to the side and off his arms as he approached the bed.

“All business, huh?” you asked, pushing yourself up off your pillows by your forearms, watching as Shouto climbed onto the bed on his knees, finally pulling his jumpsuit down past his crotch.

You’d taken a bet with yourself on the color of his pubes—it’s not like you’d be losing either way if you got to see them. They turned out to be dual-colored, but not the stark red and white of his hair. No, they were more neutral in tone, like yours. Unlike yours, they were nested above a heavy cock, already shining with precum—or actual cum, you didn’t know—at the head.

Shouto didn’t reply to your comment, and you weren’t surprised. Some people went totally nonverbal when hit by sex pollen quirks, and that was fine. You’d rather someone button their lip than ruin the mood by saying something off, after all. All business was fine by you—this was your job, after all. And no matter the size of his mouth, his cock was just fucking right.

You naturally lowered your legs as Shouto began kneeing over you, cock in hand. Your brain only just managed to catch up to what was going on when his legs stopped on either side of your ribs, his leaking cockhead crossing your eyes before you. Automatically, your jaw dropped open, and Shouto’s cock smeared pre against your cheek and the corner of your mouth before sinking deep into your mouth, drawing a first obscene moan out of him.

A humming moan fell out of you too, barely able to take in the taste of Shouto’s cock before it was pressing against the back of your throat, springing tears to your eyes automatically. Something about aphrodisiac quirks so often seemed to play with the taste of these heroes’ cum. No longer was it bitter, but just heady, salty, and more pleasant than it should have been as it coated your tongue and throat. You adored it, and purposefully relaxed your muscles so that you could take more of him in.

Shouto didn’t hold back. With barely half a breath in your lungs, Shouto was thrusting deep in the back of your throat so that your spit dripped from your mouth and smacked wetly between his balls and your chin. You blinked tears out of your eyes and looked up at him to find blown pupils staring back at you, gaze hot and pointed.

There was light behind those eyes. Whatever Shouto was right now, it wasn’t unthinking, not pure instinct. No, the way he was fucking your throat, the way his eyes had you pinned—it was intentional.

Abruptly, Shouto pulled out, a think strand of spit snapping from his dick, cold on your tongue as you panted from the rough treatment. You held your mouth open, expecting him to shove back in once you’d caught your breath, but Shouto seemed to have other plans. He moved down your body, soaked cock again in his palm, and his eyes now set on your pussy. You reached for one of the condoms you’d set out next to you, and held it in front of him.

“Hate to sound like an after-school special, but no glove…”

Shouto paused, eyeing you for just a moment before taking the square and making quick work of it, rolling it over himself.

Then, abruptly, he put a hand on your cheek, drawing your eyes back up to his. “Thank you for your hard work. It does not go unappreciated.”

“What the—”

You were left agog at his statement, wholly unprepared as he swiftly took each of your thighs in one hand, spread them, and plunged in you to the hilt. You gasped high in your chest, your throat still tender from being rawed by Shouto’s dick. He leaned over you, sighing with a relief that doubled then halved the size of his chest. His forehead touched yours in a strange moment of intimacy, and, for a moment, you wondered if that was it. Was that all the release condition took? Penetration? Or had he cum and you just hadn’t noticed?

Were you going to be left to tend to yourself with the bullet vibrator in your glove compartment yet again?

Then Shouto leaned back, looked at you again with those sharp eyes, and began smacking into you with abandon.

“Fuck,” you let out as Shouto’s balls, still wet with your spit, left their mark on your ass with every deep thrust he gave you.

Shouto manhandled your thighs, grabbing them firmly in each hand as he reared back fully on his knees again, taking the lower half of your body with him. You reflexively braced with your arms, and soon they were the only part of you still in contact with the bed, along with your upper back and head still resting on the comfortable stack of pillows.

As was often the case, you’d lost control of the situation. You could barely match Shouto’s thrusts on your own as he repeatedly used his upper body strength to bring you to him, and his lower body strength to send his hips right back in return. If you tried to reach him, your fingertips would barely brush his thighs, much less any other part of him. You were totally at his mercy.

You couldn’t help but eyeball his broad biceps, flexed by holding up the weight of most of your body. And aside from the sweat dripping from his forehead—probably quirk-induced—he was showing little to no strain.

He hadn’t always had muscles like this, you were sure. You couldn’t help but remember pundits sounding off on Shouto’s overreliance on his quirk over physical strength, or the difference between his body and the massive tank that was his father, Endeavor. They’d shown clips of his body—handsome, always handsome—but either Shouto had done a lot of bulking in the last few years or those newscasters had been particularly unkind. Likely both. Because now, drops of sweat were trickling from his body in rivulets; there were no straight paths to go down. A bulging muscle here to dip around, the crease from a flexed ab there to pool in. You were hypnotized by his form, even the thighs straining under the part of his uniform that he hadn’t bothered to burn off.

Your mind was so enraptured by thoughts of Shouto’s body that the sensations happening to yours crept up on you. All at once, you realized that your thighs were burning. Actually, one was burning, and the other was freezing cold, both just under his palms and branching up the fingers currently painting five bruises into each muscle.

A gasp flew out of your mouth and your eyes rolled back as your thighs suddenly began quaking unbidden. Shouto looked down at you, his expression easy save for those passionate eyes, little huffs escaping his slack jaw. “Too much?” he asked.

Your head shook side to side, a vehement no as Shouto dug his fingers even deeper into your flesh, bringing dull throbs of pain so close to where every thrust brought about sharp flashes of pleasure. It felt like a betrayal when he just then loosened his grip to slide his hands up to your knees and hook them over his shoulder. Then those hands, right at the brink of freezing and searing pressed into the meat of your ass as he brought your hips to his with redoubled force.

That first new thrust sent Shouto’s head turning to the side, digging a painful bite into the fleshy part of your calf, making you cry out. A moment later, he let go, his tongue passing over the teeth marks like a salve over a wound.

All the dueling sensations had you close. You’d been teasing yourself for so long before Shouto had even shown up and now he was fucking into you like…well, like his life depended on it.

God, was it wrong to love fuck or die quirks?

You were quick to take a hand and put it back on your aching clit, despite the strain it put on your neck and upper back to lose one arm of support. Part of a good fucking was being folded like a pretzel, and you’d just book a massage appointment tomorrow to deal with it. Surely saving the life of the number three hero was worth a reward.

Shouto’s eyes honed in on your fingers moving rapidly over your clit, and you bet he could feel the twitches of your cunt approaching climax. A hand left your ass and went behind his head to pat your ankles. “Cross them,” he instructed.

Obediently, you crossed your ankles, making your position a bit sturdier as Shouto continued to drive you back onto him with one hand. Then that second hand went to yours, brushing it away with the backs of his knuckles. A surprisingly gentle gesture for the man who was kneading bruises into your ass and biting your leg. Then, with his thumb, he painted one slow, hard, blazing stripe up your clit, and you came instantly.

“Fuck!” you shouted as your back arched in midair, the crown of your head digging into the pillows as your neatly crossed ankles came undone, your thighs shaking and falling from Shouto’s grip. His cock slid out of you as your lower half bounced once on the bed. Before the springs could vault you back, Shouto was on top of you, pressing himself back in your still convulsing cunt.

His thrusts were long, desperate as he breathed into your neck. He mouthed the base of your neck with light bites and suckles—never quite kissing. Your thighs came back up around his hips and his left hand went back to squeezing your thigh. Meanwhile, the right came between your thighs, surprising you as two fingers began prodding at your entrance.

Almost immediately, you could feel the heat of the stretch. Or rather, you would have felt the heat of the stretch, had his fingers not been ice cold against you. You cried out as he curled his fingers forward while his cock kept thrusting straight through you, the hot and cold contrast nearly too much. You wondered how much more intense it would feel if Shouto were unbound by the condom, and you able to bear its full heat.

“Please,” you whimpered as your orgasm began to rise again, too quickly, nearly as sudden as the first one had been, but without all the build up. This one felt like it was going to tear out of you.

Just then, the nips that Shouto had been teasing over your neck went away, and he planted one more good bite on your shoulder as his thrusts became insistent, the fingers petting inside you matched with a cold thumb over your clit. And neither of you could hold on a moment longer.

Shouto groaned low and bone deep in your ear while your voice, still raspy from early, keened in his. Your thighs went tight around his waist and his hand was trapped between you as you both rode out your highs. It took a full minute for your muscles to unwind, and your feet to fall flat to the bed. At that point, Shouto pulled out and rolled over next to you, both of you panting as the sweat dried on your skin.

Shouto pulled the condom off of himself and found a trashcan to toss it into before falling flat on his back again. After a few moments of nothing but heavy breathing, he opened his mouth. “Thank you for your professionalism.”

You snorted. “You’re welcome,” you managed, keeping your laughter at bay. “That’s not what people usually thank me for.”

“Thank you for saving my life?” Shouto tried again, his gaze shifting over to you.

His eyes were still bright, but his gaze less sharp, obscured by dual-colored bangs falling over it. Suddenly, Shouto looked a great deal more innocent than the man who’d been fucking the life out of you just minutes ago. Perhaps an effect of the quirk wearing off, perhaps the effect of unfettered pleasure meeting relief.

“More common, yes,” you replied, unable to keep the smile off your face.

“You’re very good at what you do,” Shouto said, his eyes going to the spot where he’d bitten your shoulder. He circled it with one finger, brows furrowing. “You’re like a hero.”

“Hah,” you returned, looking up at the ceiling. You weren’t going to let this be the moment in your career that made you blush. “Vixen, the orgasm hero. I don’t think it would meet the commission’s guidelines.”

“Perhaps not,” Shouto said, sitting up and pulling up what remained of his costume, frowning at the spot where he’d torn it. You supposed you needn’t have worried about this costume going to the cleaners; the support team would likely toss it and make a replacement.

“There are clothes you can change into in the closet,” you said, pointing to the near invisible door in the back wall.

Shouto waved you away as he stood up. “This will be fine to make it to the locker room with.”

“Suit yourself,” you said as you pushed yourself up, trying to remember where you’d thrown your leggings before you’d started jerking of, grunting as your spine cracked.

Shouto plucked the leggings from near the foot of the bed and tossed them to you before heading towards the door. With his hand on the knob, he turned back and made eye contact with you one last time, the ghost of a smile you’d never seen before on his lips. “Thanks again…Vixen.”

As he closed the door, you could only blame your own impropriety, that utter lack of virtue that you first thought was:

Number two pro hero, Shouto: check.

[softer-ua]

I was thinking about how Katsuki has never seen Deku in the hospital before and how Deku might be surprised to see him, and how that would probably hurt Katsukis feelings.

Then I decided to be self-indulgent and write the scene out. It was supposed to be short but I got super self-indulgent, because I like making Katsuki feel and making it hurt 🥰

I don’t wanna be unexpected

Deku carefully cracks open his eyes slowly taking in a dark unfamiliar ceiling and the heavy aching of his limbs, he isn’t fully cast anymore but a routine stiffness that tells him he had been.

 He’s grown used to this routine over the last year, he doesn’t even bother trying to sit up. Instead, he just scans the room the best he can from his semi-horizontal position. 

Turning his head to the left he sees an empty visiting chair and a small window letting in the city’s lights. It’s the only light the room has so it must be well into the middle of the night. 

Continuing to the right he sees a small nightstand filled with get-well cards and gifts. It brings a smile to his cracked lips, he’d most certainly cry if his body had the water to spare. 

If you told Deku a year ago that he’d get into UA he might have believed you, but never in a million years would he believe you if you told him he was on friendly terms with at least 1/3 of all of UA’s hero course students. 

Sometimes that felt like the most unbelievable part of everything. Having his idol pass his legacy to him to beat an ancient evil? Crazy but within the realm of his imagination. 

Making close friends with half his class and being at a minimum a positive acquaintance to most of his peers? It was almost unthinkable for a kid who’d spent his whole life being scorned and left out by even his teachers. 

Choked up by his feelings, Deku tries to swallow the painful lump forming in his throat. He’s worried so many people and let them down by getting hospitalized yet again. 

He’s too dehydrated to cry but he can’t help the dry cracked warble that escapes him. It takes a concentrated effort to clear his throat and not break down completely. It wouldn’t be cathartic at this moment, just painful. 

A small groan from the foot of his bed pulls his attention away from reading what he could of the cards. 

What he sees doesn’t instantly register with his groggy mind. That’s not uncommon, usually, the longer he’s out the more disoriented he is upon waking, his body might have made a full recovery but the brain takes longer to re-engage with its surroundings. 

Deku doesn’t expect to see Kacchan of all people in his hospital room at all, let alone when he first wakes up in the dead of night, but the blonde tuft of hair sticking up from a familiar orange hoodie turned makeshift pillow cradled in well-toned arms makes the figure resting over the edge of his hospital bed unmistakable 

Deku would know that pale face pinched into a grimace anywhere. 

It adds to the layer of confusion he’s grown used to as part of waking up hospitalized. It also adds a layer of dread and an equal amount of relief. Things must be pretty bad if Kacchan is here, but Kacchan is here and he looks completely whole. It’s a best worst-case scenario. 

Kacchan lets out a small grunt as he pushes his face deeper into orange cotton. Deku’s heart squeezes at the sight of the blonde's obvious discomfort. 

Kacchan should be at home sleeping in a real bed, not hunched over in a visitor chair clutching a hoodie for a pillow. 

Without thinking Deku calls out “Kacchan?”, his voice just above a whisper, a selfish part of him hopes Kacchan will stay asleep a little longer. That he’ll stay where Deku can see him and knows he’s okay. But he knows it’s selfish. So he calls again a little louder, his voice hoarse and scratchy from lack of use. 

The blonde shoots up, eyes near frantic as he looks around before red irises settle their sites on him with more concern than Deku ever remembers seeing on Kacchan. Well, at least outside a fight and directed at him.

He hopes they're not about to fight, but when it comes to Kacchans temperament… well he’d be a fool to dismiss the possibility of it. 

For a moment all Kacchan does is stare at him. It makes something cold and heavy settle in his stomach. Nothing scares Kacchan, and yet he looks completely shaken. 

“Deku? Are you really awake this time?” Katsuki tries to not make his whisper sound as desperate as he feels. There’s no point getting worked up over another dream or worse a still drug-addled Deku, but this Deku seems to recognize him for the first time, and although tired his green eyes shined with a level of coherency that’s been missing for a few days now.

Katsukis’s chest grew tight seeing it. It paled in comparison to the glimmer of brilliance that usually shone in those beautiful emeralds, but when compared to the unfocused glazed look he had been sporting the last few days? Well, Katsuki thought he just might collapse with relief. 

This is what he’d been waiting for, Deku’s been physically healed for at least 2 days now but consciously he’s been pretty touch and go. “Uh, I think so?” That’s definitely not the kinda question Deku had been expecting, but he has his own question he wants to get to before they get into that. 

Pushing through the dry burning in his throat Deku rattled off the most pressing questions. “How are you feeling? Is everyone okay? Did LOV getaway? What’s going on?” 

Annoyance flashes in Katsukis’s eyes before quieting with acceptance, of course, the nerd wants to know how everyone else is and the current status. Katsuki wanted the same when he first woke up, they were heroes in training, after all. Their own lives would always take a backseat to their self-appointed responsibilities. 

“Hold on. You sound like sh– not good.” Katsuki got up and got the nerd a cup of water and then helped him sit upright, trying to decide on what to tell him. Completely missing the way Deku flushed at his uncharacteristic gentleness. 

Katsuki decided on the bare minimum. 

“I don’t wanna talk about that sh- not good fight right now. All you need to know is that everyone is fine. You’re the only one still layed up, worrying everyone half to death. You’ve been out for almost a week, you woke up a few times but you were all loopy calling people by the wrong names.” 

Calling him by the wrong name. Deku must have said an incoherent hello to half the class only sometimes guessing who he was speaking to correctly or just talking to no one at all before immediately falling back asleep. Deku had of course asked about him more than a few times but not once did the bastard see him sitting right in front of him. 

It had taken every ounce of willpower Katsuki possessed to not throttle him, but he’d promised All Might that for the sake of Auntie Inko he wouldn’t upset the nerd. 

The pride Katsuki had just momentarily taken in thinking to get Deku water, the gentleness he took help the dweeb sit up, and managing not to swear when recounting the transgressions to boot turned ashen when he saw the way Deku shied away with guilt. 

A stubborn part of him felt righteous and believed Deku should feel guilty, a larger part felt a sense of failure in breaking his promise to All Might literally the first time he actually spoke to Deku. 

“Wait, if everyone else is okay what are you doing here?” Deku feels himself relaxing despite his guilt, contentment settling in the spaces where trepidation previously roosted, he trusted Kacchan to be honest. 

If he says everything’s fine then it is, but the lack of pressing news makes Kacchan passed out at the end of his bed even more confusing. 

The painkillers he’s on make thinking feel like everything’s ruining through Windows 95’, he can practically hear his brain's fan whirring. His mind can’t really pull up fresh thoughts, just old truths, Kacchans never visited before and he apparently has no reason to now.

Katsuki sighs as he slumps back into his chair. Deku’s still clearly confused and he isn’t sure he has the energy to repeat himself right now, then considering how he failed the first time he decides might as well try.

“Everyone is fine, everything is as fine as it can be at the moment. You’re in the hospital recovering from the fight with supercharged crusty mcdusty, but you are also apparently going to be fine” Dekus staring at him like he has two heads so he keeps talking. “The league is being dealt with, I’m not talking about the fighting until tomorrow at the earliest, neither of us is in shape for that conversation and I don’t know much myself yet”

Deku’s pinch brows and slight pout tell him he’s got questions, questions he can’t answer. Anytime he even thinks about how the fight went down he feels like he’s going to explode.

Trying to reign in every ounce of self control he possesses he slumps further in his chair rubbing his face and counts to five. Then kicks Dekus hospital bed for good measure, before speaking again.

“Deku just rest, you're clearly still out of it and I don’t wanna repeat myself a third time.” Seriously how many other ways can he say everything is, by a very loose definition, fine. How much clearer can he make it that he’s not giving anything else up?

“Uh you didn’t have to repeat yourself? I believed you the first time, Kacchan” Deku couldn’t help but feel like Kacchan was purposely misinterpreting his question, but why? It shouldn’t be a hard question, he’d really only asked to make conversation and clear up some brain cobwebs.

“Then why did you ask–“ Something ugly and broken twists in Katsuki’s gut as he slowly repeated Dekus' question in his head ‘what are you doing here’.

“I just didn’t expect to see you here if you didn’t have to be.”

Deku wasn’t, hadn’t been, asking why someone was there with him but why he, Katsuki, was there. Deku wanted to know why he was here instead of literally anyone else. Deku didn’t know that Katsuki had basically taken up permanent residence in here with him, probably couldn’t see the cot laying at the foot of his bed.

White-hot rage coursed through him in an instant, after everything they went through Deku thought he’d just ditch him to some extras in scrubs? Katsuki had a bad temper on good sleep, exhausted he was ready to put Deku back in a coma.

He struggled with the feeling of his palms heating, but the second before he felt like detonating Katsuki caught Deku’s eyes in full.

As always they show everything the nerds feeling and the familiarity soothes him in a way he can’t explain. Doesn’t ever want to explain.

It used to drive him up the wall like Deku was purposely giving him messages in a language he couldn’t read. Shoving in his face how inadequate he is in comparison.

Katsuki knows now that’s not the case and over the last few months, he’s actually been learning how to read Deku for the first time in his life.

And he’s discovering that even though it’s an advanced read for him he likes the challenge and even more he likes the victorious warmth that spreads down to his toes when he can tell just what Dekus is thinking without any words.

Right now Deku does look slightly confused and yet still so open and trusting, and his crooked shy smile proves that he is actually happy Katsukis here. His confusion is just that, confusion.

Always glad to see him, always caught off guard by his presence.

As much as the familiarity soothed the recognition hurt.

A couple of months on good terms doesn’t erase all the bad years, he knows this, he’s told himself as much a dozen-plus times.

He’s never visited Deku in the infirmary or the hospital before now.

At first just because his stubborn pride insisted that he couldn’t show weakness/care for someone else because he was above them all, that he had to constantly act like Deku was below him. Even when he recognized Deku as a rival he didn’t visit, partly because of lingering pride but mostly because he felt like he didn’t deserve to.

He was too much of a coward/slave to his pride to risk being turned away.

This time he hadn’t even considered Deku might not want him, he had just selfishly insisted he stay by his side for his own peace of mind.

To see Deku wanted him here but couldn’t understand why Katsuki would want to be here himself left his fingers feeling numb as all the adrenaline drained out of him.

Deku studied Kacchan intently, his explosive rival had turned to him and risen half out his chair looking like he was about to shout at him but when their eyes locked the words had apparently died on his tongue.

Now Kacchan was just staring at him with an unreadable expression entirely unmoving after he plopped back in his seat, never breaking eye contact. It was clear now that Kacchan hadn’t understood his question at first but now he seemed lost at how to answer.

Deku wanted to wait for Kacchan to speak but experience told him he shouldn’t hold his breath.

Besides it was late, as much as he desperately didn’t want him to go, Kacchan should be safely asleep in his own room. It’d be selfish to ask him to stay.

Kacchan probably hadn’t meant to stay as late as he did, he was just prone to falling asleep wherever he was once 9 pm rolled around. Deku knew first hand that Auntie Mitsuki had a very strict bedtime policy that had long been physically instilled into Kacchans psyche.

“Kacchan, it’s late you should head back to the dorms and get some real sleep. I feel fine.” At the sudden incredulous tweak of a blonde eyebrow, Deku rushed to elaborate, “I mean I'm of course tired, and a sore but I feel whole. This is a familiar routine for me, I’m okay.”

Katsuki thought back to what he told All Might a lifetime ago, “he never considers himself”.

Here Deku was laying in a hospital bed concerned about his sleep and knowing just what he wanted/needed to hear, that Deku was okay, straight from the source.

It’s all he’d wanted to hear for almost a week now and he had to press his lips shut into a tight line to keep the embarrassing whimper he felt clawing at his throat from escaping.

“I know that you can go to the front desk and the attendant will call for a UA shuttle, doesn’t matter the time, Todoroki has left as late as 3 am”

Oh if that didn’t have something ugly snapping its jaws and thirsty for blood inside Katsuki. At heart, he’s always been explosively petty.

As much comfort as Todoroki being almost equally worried about Deku had been over the last week anytime anyone so much as even accidentally hinted at the ways Katsuki had failed to be there for Deku before now had him seeing red.

Reminding him how others had stepped up and into the places, Katsuki felt he should have been, felt like a slap in the face. But coming from Deku the anger he felt turned inward.

Where he usually saw red, all he saw was green. Not the warm emerald hue of Deku sitting in front of him, but dark bitter jealous green.

Petulant ‘whys’ clawed at his ribs. Why did people who’d only know Deku for a year have a more prominent roles in the nerds life than he did after knowing him forever, why did Deku have to like those extras so damn much, why didn’t he realize sooner how important Deku was, why did he have to care about any of that at all, why did Deku have to bring up that goddamn candy cane, why did Deku want to send him away, why wasn’t Deku even half as desperate to stay by his side as he was, why why why?!

He voiced none of these thoughts, instead just continued staring grumpily ahead. Hoping Deku didn’t notice how heavy his breathing had gotten or how he tightened his grip on the chair's armrests.

Deku took another sip of water before continuing. “I’m happy you’re here, really, it means a lot to me.” He let a genuine full smile slip on his face, he didn’t want Kacchan thinking he wasn’t grateful for his presence.

He really was happy that Kacchan was the first person he got to see upon waking up.

Circumstantial or not the fact that Kacchan was here with him now was a deep comfort to him and a pleasant way to wake up. Usually, it was to his classmates' forced positivity or his overly fussy weeping mother and that never got easier to deal with. As confusing as the change was it was a nice one. And he told him as much.

Why did Deku always know exactly what to say to people? When he, Katsuki Bakugo, couldn’t say anything at all.

Normally the instant relief his body felt at Deku’s words just pissed him off, but tonight exhaustion took its toll.

He felt the tears he’d been fighting all week fall hot and sticky down his cheeks, embarrassment shame and guilt tinted his face a splotchy pink. When he felt the lump in his throat give way to a choked hiccup he didn’t just crack, he shattered.

Ugly sobs racked through him and he buried his face in his hands and dug his fingers into his hair.

Why was the only familiar part of this him breaking down in front of Deku? He’s known Deku his whole life. He should have been the first and last person in Deku’s hospital room every time from the very beginning if for nothing more than obligation. Any one of those times could have been the last time.

Deku would have slipped away from him, and Katsuki would have been one of the last ones to know.

He hadn’t because he knew it’d always end up like this, him blubbering like a baby over Dekus hospital bed and he couldn’t risk it before. Too desperate to keep that little voice inside him that picks apart his every sign of weakness quiet.

It never goes away and UA had made it so much louder, he couldn’t give more feed to the fire. That’s exactly what Deku does to him.

On bad days Katsuki feels the little claws of insecurity scratching at his brain comparing him to Deku, that Deku’s surpassing him because he’s weak and he’s going to get left behind, he’s going to be forgotten.

On equally bad days he surpasses Deku completely and the voice switches gears, telling him he doesn’t deserve Dekus praises. That he’s a hopeless brat with an oversized ego and Deku’s words are empty. Katsuki hasn’t earned them, and he never will, Deku’s just placating him.

Katsuki doesn’t have good days.

Why did he even care though, Deku has seen him cry a dozen times and never once has it changed anything, hell Deku cries all the time.

But Deku’s never been debilitated by crying the way he is, Deku always keeps moving like he doesn’t even notice he’s crying. But he, Katsuki, can barely breathe around his tears.

Because he’s weak and a coward and everything Dekus not. Deku’s light years ahead of him in being a better person and by proxy a better hero and he’s never going to catch up.

Delirious with exhaustion Katsukis thoughts keep spiraling out of his control, growing more and more vicious.

He doesn’t even deserve to call himself Dekus' rival, Deku’s going to leave him behind, Deku’s going to keep taking on the world by himself because he’s not strong enough to fight alongside him, Dekus going to get himself killed and it’s all his fault. He’s hyperventilating through his sobs now.

“Wha- Kacchan, what’s wrong?” Deku suppressed a small groan at stretching stiff unused muscles as his scrambled brain had him lurch forward to grasp Kacchans wrists, he can see where blunt nails dig into his scalp. Gently as he could, Deku replaces callused hands with his crooked ones.

“Hey look at me.” He lifted Kacchans head to meet his eyes and took deep slow dramatic breaths encouraging Kacchan to match his breathing. Red eyes frantically scanned his face and clutched his wrists tightly like a lifeline, desperate that Deku doesn’t pull away.

Slowly their breathing synchronized, the tears kept flowing though, Deku was certain he was crying now too but he made no move to confirm this. He just kept watching Kacchan, keeping his own breathing steady. This wasn’t the first time he’s had Kacchan match his breathing, but it is the first time he’s been this close and this obvious about it. Then again Kacchans never looked this desperate.

In the past when he’s noticed Kacchans breathing has sped up and his gaze looks far away he’ll nonchalantly sit down next to him like he hasn’t noticed Kacchans problem at all, then he’ll practice his own breathing exercises a little louder than would be considered polite. Consciously or not Kacchan follows suit.

He’d learned the tactic when he was 7 from his mom helping one of their neighbors on the way to the store, a very nice lady he called Auntie Kay. She had some kind of disorder that gave her bad anxiety and had apparently forgotten to take meds that morning and got overwhelmed by the noise. His mom used to be an assisted living caregiver before she became, well his mom, so she had experience with this kind of thing.

Later she explained what she’d been doing. That you're someone they have a long history of trusting you don’t want to get in their space, just reaffirm to them that they’re safe and try to get them to slow their breathing, focus on breathing out.

1, because It’s hard to concentrate if you don’t feel safe. 2, the human body doesn’t know if it has enough oxygen, it knows if it’s getting enough air and if it has too much carbon dioxide in it, and you breathe out carbon dioxide.

That day his mom was like a mini hero, saving the day with a smile. It made him more aware that there’s more to being a hero than just fighting villains, it’s about saving people.

He can’t fight villains from a hospital bed, he could still be there for others. He could be there for Kacchan.

After a minute he hesitantly thumbed away the freshest tears but that seemed to just make things worse as another sob racked through Kacchan and he tightened his grip on his wrists. It wasn’t until Kacchan finally spoke and he reflexively snapped his jaw shut that Deku realized he’d been making soft shushing noises.

Katsuki tightened his grip on Deku’s wrists as he choked on one last sob thinking that Deku was finally pulling away, but when he just continued to thumb his tears away and making soft little noises he let himself believe Deku wasn’t going to dismiss him again.

Katsukis never let himself be comforted like this by anyone, not even as a child, but he was too tired to fight it, too distraught to care about how selfish he’s sure he’s being, and too certain that Deku was the only thing keeping him tethered to reality.

He’s confronted his own mortality a few times this year but none of it had compared to being confronted in real-time with Dekus. Living with Deku so close to death over the last week had taken its toll on everyone but Katsuki especially had been unraveling more and more each day.

The first day he’d been ready to bring the entire hospital down if he didn’t get to Deku’s side immediately. It only got worse from there.

He’d grown more cantankerous than he’d ever been, but the fire in him had been dying out. By the time Deku first woke up and didn’t recognize him the only thing he’d say to anyone was the same mumbled shut up, only sometimes accompanied by half-hearted sparks daring anyone to try to remove him from the room.

Auntie Inko was distraught too but she had let All Might take her home after that first visit and encouraged her to rest there saying something about how no mother should have to see this side of hero work or whatever.

The doctors were probably just worried about what all those tears might do to their equipment, Katsuki certainly had been even if he hadn’t said so.

Katsuki had promised Inko he’d stay by Deku’s' side, she’d looked conflicted about something but they both silently agreed that was a discussion for another day.

Katsuki doesn’t know what to say now but desperately feels like he needs to say something.

He’s terrified it’ll all come out wrong and freak Deku out, Deku who just woke up for real for the first time! He’s terrified of saying nothing and losing his chance to say anything at all because Deku just woke up for real for the first time in a week!

Deku deserves to hear him apologize for everything, but he doesn’t feel like he’s ready to be forgiven and if Deku doesn’t forgive he doesn’t know what’ll happen to him, he may very well implode.

If Deku turns him away then the kindest thing the universe could do for him would be to ignite every nitroglycerin-soaked cell in his body and just let him go. But the universe isn’t kind and will instead make him force himself out of this room and into a UA shuttle and into a life where everything green fades into bleak gray.

“Kacchan, your muttering” Deku says with the softest smile Katsuki has ever seen, and he feels like all his broken pieces have begun melting.

Deku stays silent, thumbs rubbing gentle circles. He seems content with doing nothing more than smiling at him until the sun comes up. And Katsuki feels another sob rip through him as he forces himself to speak.

“I meant it when I told you to keep your eyes on me.” The desperation in his own voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard to him. “I want you to know to look for me, and that I’ll be there. Even outside of heroing. I want you to expect me at every turn, forever. I don’t wanna be unexpected”

Deku leans forward and Katsuki thinks he’ll stop breathing all over again until their foreheads bump together. Deku’s looking right in his eyes, and he’s so close Katsuki's eyes can barely focus on him. They just stay like that for a small eternity while Katsuki’s heart beats wildly for entirely different reasons. One’s he’s not sure he’s ready to understand.

“Okay, Kacchan”

[gonewiddershins]

1, 9 10 13 15 16 18 23 52 53 55 60 63 71 80 86 107 121 127 134 135 for ur ask meme

wheeeee~

okay so there's are enough of these questions that I'm gonna answer this in parts because otherwise (a) I'll never finish and (b) tumblr WILL end up earing my drafts and I wince just thinking about that. So here we go-

1. a book that is close to your heart

The Beginning by K.A. Applegate. Anyone who's spent some time on my tumblr knows about my obsession with this series. It drilled into my ear and took over all higher life form function way back when I was an impressionable pre-teen. And then after sometime, when I thought I'd found other things to obsess about, I found copies of the final arc and it decided to permanently take up residence in my brain.

The Beginning is the final installment of the Animorphs series, which famously feature kids turning into animals to fight brain stealing alien puppeteers. It's not a climax- it's a extended denouement, because the books have always been about how children people are affected by war as much as as it was about the actual war. Animorphs also ended on a very bittersweet note, something unthinkable to baby me who had never seen a story end this way before. It was a learning experience.

Quote:

"Jake, you can't . . ." She took a deep breath. "You can't equate the victim and the perpetrator."

"So as long as you're playing defense it's not possible to commit a war crime?" I asked. "That's pretty close to just saying that the winner makes the rules because it's the winner who writes the history."

She grabbed my arm and searched for my eyes, forcing me to look at her. "No, Jake, it isn't. There are a lot of close calls in history, lots of wars where the blame is evenly split between the sides. This isn't one of them. Before they came to Earth no human ever attacked a Yeerk. No human ever harmed a Yeerk. This one is clear: We are the victims. They made war on us."

"That's good," I said softly. "All of that is good. We have justification. We're the good guys."

Marco said, "That's right, Big Jake, we are."

I nodded. "That's good for the big picture. See, my problem is a little more personal."

Ax asked.

"Well, Ax-man, you're right, you did call my attention to the possibilities on the Pool ship. And when you did that I guess I should have thought, Well, Jake, it's a harsh, terrible thing to do, but you're justified because, after all, you're the victim here. But that's not what I thought. You know what I thought?"

Cassie released her grip on me. But Marco just took a step up close, right in my face.

"I know what you thought, Jake. You thought Die, you filthy worms. Feel the fear, Yeerks. Feel the pain. Feel the helplessness. You wanted them to suffer and the idea of them suffering and dying made you happy. You were thrilled. You were high."

Cassie winced. She looked away.

I said, "Yeah, Marco. That was about it: word for word."

9. your favourite book of 2020 2022

2022 has been a weird year, reading-wise. My goodreads list is as bare as a chocolate box after two hours in my company, because the site is not good at tracking webtoons and webnovels. Which in turn makes it harder for me to remember what I liked and how much I liked it, because that's 90% of why I use goodreads in the first place. So you know, answering this makes me twitchy, because if I'm not keeping track how would I even know what my favorite is?

BUT. I can tell you which story IMMEDIATELY made me consume other adaptations, scour through all of its Ao3 pages, and go on a re-read almost instantly after the fanfics ran out and it's Spy x Family by Tatsuya Endo. Also, it has an active tumblr fanbase- glory be.

Spy x Family is about a spy, an assassin, and a telepath playing house. It's about found family. It's about two people you really wouldn't peg as parent material at first look being the most adorable parents ever. It's about people calmly accepting (and in most cases not even recognizing) each other's weirdness. It's about the humanity in war-torn places and war-torn people. Also there are a bunch of first graders who are having their own drama and it is somehow vastly entertaining.

Panel: (read right to left)

10. a book that got you through something

deep sigh. Okay, so I have a few mixed feelings about these books today that I didn't have when I first read them, but hear me out here.

Once upon a time, I entered into college as a bright-eyed, hopeful child who was sure she'd have the world within her grasp soon. Fast forward eight months and I was a depressed wreck who spent an hour a day crying and moving slowly but steadily towards suicidal thoughts. Suffice to say, it was not a good time.

In those trying times, books 1 and 2 of the Dresden Files gave me some much-needed laughs. Book 3, Grave Peril, went a step further, making me actually care about the worldbuilding and the character, giving characters actual losses, and getting me emotionally invested in everyone. The rest of the series accompanied me though my hellish time in college, and while it was probably not the best coping mechanism, I'm thankful it was there. Anything to quiet down the screaming in my head a little.

Quote:

“I still can't believe," Michael said, sotto voce, "that you came to the Vampires' Masquerade Ball dressed as a vampire.”

Part 1 of 7 |

[rhysismydaddy]

Unholy Matrimony Pt. 2 (Nessian)

Damnation Series

Parts 1 / 3 / 4 / 5 

_____________________________________________________

~Nesta~

The day after meeting my fiancé, I drop Alexei off at the plane, tell him goodbye, and drive further down the tarmac to where Cassian’s waiting in a completely different private plane.

Very environmentally conscious, our lifestyle

The stairs are unfolded, so after making sure my luggage is transferred over, I head inside.

Cassian’s waiting, sipping bourbon despite the fact that it’s nine in the morning.

He’s dressed in dark jeans, boots, and a black long sleeve t-shirt that makes the tattoos on his hands and knuckles seem even more pronounced. He seems more comfortable now than yesterday.

Like he’s not trying to fit into the mold of a respectable gentleman in a suit.

He looks over as my heels click against the floor, eyes dragging up my legs, pausing at my chest, and scanning my face.

“Hey,” he murmurs, almost like he doesn’t know what else to say.

My lips twitch as I slide into the seat across from him, staying silent for now to throw him off.

As expected, he shifts in his seat, looking mildly uncomfortable.

Then, like he realizes what I’m doing, he narrows his eyes. “You realize that a woman who just sits there, looks pretty, and doesn’t argue is pretty much a man’s dream, right?”

A smile tugs at my lips, but I sigh like I’m not the least bit amused. “Good morning, Cassian.”

His mouth opens and closes a few times as he tries to determine the proper response for such a ground-breaking conversation opener.

He finally decides on: “You don’t have an accent.”

“Not when I speak English.”

Alexei, the hypocritical bastard, said English should sound like English and Russian should sound like Russian.

“Do you speak any other languages?” he asks, apparently not having looked in my file. He’s probably trying to figure out if his secret conversations with his fellow countrymen are safe.

“I speak Italian, since that’s what you really want to know.”

He grins, playful light in his eyes. “I think I’d like to hear that.”

An amused laugh escapes me at that, but I give him what he wants as I murmur, “Sono sicuro che lo faresti.” I’m sure you would.

His eyes seem to darken, and I roll my eyes. Men.

“I speak a little Russian, but not much,” he tells me. Considering I, unlike him, I did my homework, I already knew that.

Done with this conversation, I close my eyes and attempt to sleep. A plan that goes out the window when Cassian says confidently, “I usually only speak Italian when I fuck.”

I know he’s trying to feel me out, get a rise out of me, so I keep my voice completely deadpan as I reply, “Interesting. I tend to choose French.”

He laughs, face splitting into a humongous, goofy-looking grin. “Now that, I can’t wait to hear.”

Ah, yes. Because the idea I won’t sleep with him is unthinkable.

To me, too, but at least I’m not an asshole about it. Time to humble him a bit.

I feign like I’m not attracted to him in the slightest as I make a show of looking him over. “I never said you would, tupitsa.”

Before he can respond to me calling him a dumbass, I close my eyes and go to sleep.

~Cassian~

My fiancé passes out in a matter of seconds. It’s a little impressive, honestly. One second she’s teasing me with the thought of French whispers under silk sheets, the next she’s dead to the world.

I, unfortunately, am stuck on the first part.

Fuck, she’s hot.

It’s an effortless sort of beauty, considering she isn’t wearing makeup and her hair appears to be naturally blonde and straight.

Regardless, she looks like she just stepped off a runway.

Delicate bone structure, fierce eyes, full lips that sounded so good saying my name it took me a moment to formulate a response.

Distracting curves, sweeping hips, long legs that are currently crossed and allowing the slightest hint of lace at the top of her stocking to show.

My dick takes notice of that site, and I remind the greedy bastard she’s a Russian--an enemy--but he doesn’t seem to care. Nope, he wants me to peel those stockings down. With my teeth.

What’s somehow hotter than even her choice of legwear is the fact that she isn’t doing it on purpose. She’s completely relaxed, asleep for God’s sake, not trying to seduce me.

I grit my teeth and look out the window.

Like every other time I fly, I get restless after about ten minutes. I pull out my phone and make sure everything’s ready for when we land, work on my laptop for a bit, stare at Nesta sleeping for a longer bit, and pace the aisle like a caged lion when I start to feel like a creep.

Because I’ve been dealing with administrative shit like getting engaged, it’s been a while since I’ve done something to quell the rush in my blood.

Business, surprisingly, is boring when an army of hateful Russians isn’t trying to kill you all the time. I haven’t fought in days, haven’t shot my gun in longer.

I send Ricardo a text and have him set up a fight for tonight, but even the thought of the coming violence does nothing to help me calm down.

By the time we land, I’m more than ready to get the hell out of this plane.

Nesta wakes up when the wheels touch down, stretching and looking annoyingly well rested.

As the plane taxis, I tell her, “I have to work tonight.”

It’s a lie, and she cocks her eyebrow like she knows it. But she doesn’t call me on it, doesn’t even seem that interested. “I already requested a separate car.”

My brows furrow because I hate being predictable, but I keep my mouth shut.

Nesta stands as the stairs drop open, straightening her dress and pulling it down over the lacey top of her stockings that are now right in front of my face.

Before I even realize what she’s about, there’s a sharp smack to the bottom of my chin that forces my head up. She tsks, shaking her head teasingly.

“What was that for?” I ask, even though I already know.

She grabs her bag, and I follow as she walks down to the tarmac. “Somnophilia.”

I take a second to look up what the hell that is, laughing so hard I have tears in my eyes when I find the definition. Nesta shakes her head, small smile on those distracting lips, and walks to her waiting driver.

“I’ll see you at home, wife,” I call, not able to resist.

She just flips me the bird over her shoulder, making me laugh again.

Like I said, not what I was expecting.

~Nesta~

Things with Cassian are going... well, I guess.

He has the emotional maturity of a seventeen year old boy, but he isn’t terrible. As long as he stays out of my way, I dare say this marriage might work.

He’ll go about his business, I’ll go about mine, and we’ll avoid each other for happily ever after just like the fairytales say.

I shake my head as Maxim, one of the first New York transplants, navigates us through the city and to Sera. I’ve visited all my clubs at least once, and I have to admit, this one is by far my favorite.

As it should be.

The other three I run in New York were all my father’s originally. Built by a man, for the entertainment of men, I have to say they aren’t places I’d visit myself.

But I built Sera from the ground up, and while it’s designed to appeal to both men and women, men are--for the first time in history--not the priority.

The building it’s located in is a skyscraper, one I rent out to different businesses that don’t need an entire place to themselves. The ground floor is a bank, one that discretely cleans Russian money and makes us more through interest.

All in all, an unremarkable location to the public eye.

But every night, after normal banking hours have long passed, a select number of guests are invited to Sera--a speakeasy-type burlesque club with a hidden entrance in the secondary vault of the bank.

It’s secret, exclusive, and private as hell.

When we get to the bank, I enter the passcode on the side door--changed nightly--and walk through the silent lobby to the back room where the bouncer sits on a wooden stool.

“Privet, boss,” the burly man greets, sweeping the door open and ushering me through with a meaty hand. “Man in the back is asking for the owner.”

I nod and step inside, the door immediately closing behind me.

It’s the perfect level of crowded; enough people that no one stands out but not packed to the point of misery. By design, of course.

Everything seems to be the same as when I visited a few months ago except for the changed flooring I had installed last week. The tables and booths in the back are full of people captivated by the jazz singer on stage, a woman I discovered while walking to a business meeting in Paris.

Her cigarette-roughened voice had pulled me in, much like it does the audience now, and I’d offered her a job on the spot.

One of the bartenders, an ex-con who was locked up for stealing insulin for his diabetic daughter, smiles at me and slides me a tumblr of vodka as I make my way over.

“Good to see you,” Dima greets warmly. “How long are you here for?”

“Permanently.”

His eyebrows shoot up, which makes sense, considering the engagement hasn’t been announced properly. We’re apparently having a party of some kind in two weeks to celebrate the big news.

“I’ll explain later,” I tell him, noticing a group of people approaching the bar.

He nods, and I slip away towards the back corner where a roped-off set of stairs lead down to the basement below.

Like usual, there’s a private poker game happening in the main room of the bottom floor, and I stop to make say a few hellos but eventually move on to the hallway containing offices for some of the management.

The soldier stationed at the door to mine nods in acknowledgement, then tells me a whale’s inside.

My brows raise at the idea of a big-time investor coming to see me at this hour, but I shrug and walk in, shoulders back and face blank. I learned a long time ago to never let my emotions play out on my face.

The man waiting inside looks to be in his forties, richer than sin, and cold. Mafia, undoubtedly. His dark eyes rake over me, and he asks in a tone I don’t appreciate, “Who the fuck are you?”

“Nesta Orlov. You requested to speak to me?”

His bushy brows pinch together. “No, I want to speak to the owner.”

“One and the same.”

“I was told Cassian Azara is the owner.”

My jaw clenches at the thought that we’ve been engaged for less than two days and people already assume my shit is his. “By who?” I ask, remembering our upcoming nuptials aren’t even public news yet.

“My Capo.”

That gets my attention.

Rhysand’s telling people my club is Cassian’s? Why?

Something isn’t right.

I might not know the Italian boss, but I’ve heard he’s straightforward. Ruthless but honest. So why would he lie?

A little voice inside my head whispers, What if he isn’t?

Mind whirling, I turn to the man and smile politely even though it’s the last thing I feel like doing. “Would you mind giving me a moment? If you go upstairs, our bartender will get you anything you want, on the house.”

He shrugs and leaves, and as soon as the door clicks shut, I go to my desk and pull up the electronic copy of our marriage contract.

Like I thought, nothing’s amiss.

I read this shit thoroughly enough to know exactly what I was getting into, and in case I missed anything, I had my private lawyer scan over it.

But that little voice, that gut feeling, refuses to go away. So I grab my bag and look through the physical copy, dread unfurling when I notice an extra page tucked in the middle.

It’s a prenup.

One I’ve never seen.

And there, smack dab in the middle, is a line declaring the deed to Sera the property of Cassian Azara.

A rough breath forces its way out of me, and for a second, I’m so angry, so blind with rage, I can’t hardly think. What the hell is going on?

I force myself to think through this, to rationalize what I’m seeing.

Replaying the moment in the Capo’s office, I realize the switch between the original and this version of the contract must’ve happened prior. I was only in there a few minutes and had the papers in my hand the whole time.

Which means...

Alexei picks up on the first ring, like he was waiting for the call. “Da.”

“What the hell have you done?”

He sighs. “What needed doing.”

“That’s bullshit, and you know it. I wasn’t the one who started a goddamn war with the Italians, and yet I’m the one who’s paying all the prices. I’m marrying the bastard, for fuck’s sake. Give him one of your clubs.”

His tone hardens. “He didn’t want anything else.”

“I don’t give a shit! This place is my property. It isn’t yours to give away.” I take a deep breath and try to quiet the rushing in my veins. “That idiot will run it into the ground.”

There’s a long moment, and I swear he sounds a little guilty as he says calmly, “He has more than a few businesses of his own, Nesta. It will be fine.”

I pinch my lips together to keep from cursing the man who raised me.

“If you read the document,” he says, a strange note to his voice. “You’ll notice there are a number of clauses.”

My eyes scan to the bottom of the page, and I read as Alexei continues. “He is permitted from selling, unless to you. The investors have the option to vote him out at any time. And if he is unfaithful to you or ends the engagement for whatever reason, Sera is returned to you in full.”

All the violence, all the rage, seems to dim. Just a little.

This is so like Alexei; in fact, it was one of his first lessons to me.

Give someone the illusion of winning, and they’ll sign anything you want them to.

I read through the clauses again, lips twitching. “Let me get this straight. If I can prove Cassian Azara--notorious playboy of New York--is cheating on me, the club is mine? And if the board at Sera votes him out, he can’t fight it?”

I can practically hear my father’s smile. “Da.”

“Or if I drive him crazy and he ends the engagement?”

“Da.”

Sounds easy enough. I drive Alexei absolutely insane and have never had a long-term relationship. I’ll have him running for the hills in no time.

One thing doesn’t make sense, though. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I knew if I told you, you wouldn’t sign. It’s still a risk, even with the clauses” He takes a deep breath. “I never told you, but we were losing the war in New York. We would’ve lasted another year, and then we would’ve lost the city.”

“Alexei-”

“I need this alliance to hold, Volchonok,” he says. “And either of you calling off the engagement or divorcing the other is grounds for the war to start back up.”

“So you’re saying I still need to marry him.”

He gruffs a confirmation, and my brain whirls as it thinks of a new plan.

My options are down to three: have him sell to me, prove he’s cheating, or get the board to vote him out.

“One more thing. You only have until the wedding. Once you’re married, the only way to get your property back is if he signs the deed to you.”

I pinch the bridge of my nose, moving my timeline up by a factor of a hundred. Checking the calendar proves what I already know: I have less than thirty days to somehow convince one of the most notoriously stubborn men in the world to give me a multi-million dollar company.

Easy.

“I’m... sorry. For lying.”

I’m so shocked he just apologized--something he’s never done in my twenty-five years of life--it takes me a moment to respond and tell him he’s forgiven. “Ty proshchen, otets.”

I disconnect the call and swivel around in the chair, a smile pulling on my lips.

I’m going to drive him fucking crazy. All while I make him fall in love with me.

Oh, Cassian. I almost feel sorry for you.

_______________________________________________________

NEXT CHAPTER

[stuffedeggplants]

For the character asks: Captain Howzer?

First impression

Gratified by the first portrayal of a baseline clone post O66 who was given room to "breathe" as a character. Before him, all the baseline clones we see in the Bad Batch mostly exist as obstacles to CF99, never shown outside the capacity of doing their jobs during a very tense and stressful time. This portrayal led to discussion on another site where some interpreted that to mean that all chipped clones were as good as unthinking robots now devoid of personality, which to me was like saying that you can get incredibly deep insight into all the complex personality and scintillating humanity of your customs agent based on your brief and fantastically limited interaction with them at the Canadian immigration desk. So I was very glad to see Howzer as a baseline clone shown to have full agency over his own mind, personality (and excellent hair) in tact, making his own decisions, etc. 

Impression Now

I can't think of anything that's changed between when the Bad Batch came out and now.

While previously neutral on the inhibitor chip--I thought there was some good cosmic horror in the concept that was worth exploring--talk about Howzer's chip has made me more than a little tired of it. (I don’t have the energy to elaborate on that right now...maybe later.)

Favorite Moment

I liked the significance of how he handled young Hera gathering intel on the Imperial mine and what that said about the kind of character he was going to be. I think that was one of his earlier appearances, and it showed us that he can be flexible in how he interprets and enforces the rules to certain ends. He cares about the people of Ryloth and didn't want the Empire to cause them any more trouble, so he didn't report the incident, trying to balance doing his job with not creating problematic situations for the local people. It hints that he’ll eventually be forced to decide what’s more important to him, what his values are. And he choses the people of Ryloth, of course. :)

Idea for a Story

The only thing I have for him right now is something I started last winter about chronic service-related illness, but it put me in a bad headspace and I don’t want to have to go back there to finish that story.

Unpopular Opinion

Maybe that he’s only ever been stationed on Ryloth, on a 36-month tour and counting? I’m not strongly wedded to that, but for whatever reason I latched on to the idea that he rarely if ever left Ryloth for the duration of the war.

I’m not even aware of popular opinions about Howzer. 😅

Favorite Relationship

His existing relationship with Eleni and Cham, who were clearly not at pains to interact with the local military presence and who seemed to have a good level of familiarity with him. We never get to see the three interact in a casual setting, but I bet they do get along. :) (Yes I very much enjoyed the ship with all three of these characters together too!) 

Favorite Headcanon

I like an idea @skierunner came up with sometime last year about the origin of his name. Howzer/his unit interacted a lot with the locals and was on good terms with them. Eventually he faced some difficult emotional/mental struggles and became more reclusive, prompting local Twi'leks to come asking "how's your captain?" in their Ryl accents to ask after him/his health and wellbeing. (I didn't write down Skierunner's idea anywhere and I hope I'm remembering it correctly, but I think Howzer was struggling with alcoholism? Apologies if I have misremembered.)