#the thing abt being queer is that society does not want you

[wettestwraith]

it's so weird to me that transphobic lesbians exist especially ones that want nonbinary people to be excluded from lgbtq+ spaces, like they do know that gender nonconformity is a big thing in lesbian culture right?

[vlindervin7]

muslims will act violently homophobic in a country that values gay rights and then act shocked when it reflects badly on their community

[tododeku-or-bust]

could you elaborate a bit on that post abt (not) wearing headphones in public/playing your phone out loud? i was under the idea that it was nice to not play stuff aloud bc ppl might have migraines or be sound avoidant, but didn't realize i might just be seeing it from a white perspective, and id love to learn more

All right! First, check this link out: Xochitl does a far more eloquent job of explaining the idea than I would:

I assume that you're specifically honing in on my tag about the "white right of comfort".

Okay, so here's the thing. You're allowed to find public noise annoying. I too, find public TikToks and music annoying! And if you have migraines and such, I can understand how it would be impolite and inconvenient.

But what you're NOT allowed to do, is feel entitled to the public and prioritizing your OWN comfort in it over everyone else to the point of DEMANDING that it conforms to you or it's "bad". Especially when there are things you as an individual can do to prevent this discomfort.

While this gross sense of entitlement is very first world American in nature, it is extremely White American in nature because white Americans actually have the social power to enforce what they believe is the "right" thing based on their own standards.

For many cultures around the world and for many people of color, noise in the community is a GOOD thing. It's part of being a community. I feel safer if the people around me feel safe enough to be outside, to exist and to be, visibly in public.

And you got to understand, while many white people think they're genuinely in the right for believing that being loud on public transit or in the public is worth enforcing as a "bad" thing, people of color have literally already been killed for it. A Black teenager was shot in the face for playing music that a white man didn't like. A Black mentally ill man was murdered in front of EVERYBODY on a train because he was having a mental breakdown. This sort of policing ALREADY HAPPENS to us. Hell, even white gays with any sense of community should be aware of how queer gatherings would be shut down for "noise" (when in reality it was bc it was homophobia).

And now people want me to empathize that YOU'RE oppressed by... noise? On Public Transit?? IN PUBLIC?? Kiss my ass lmao.

I've been on trains where a man was legit growling at me like he wanted me dead. Another i saw Teens high on crack. Another where people beg and people sleep and people listen to music. And you know what I did? I turned my OWN music up and went on my way. Because at the end of the day, the only person I control is me!

And if people were REALLY concerned about others welfare, they would COMMUNICATE. no one is willing to say "hey, I have a headache, do you mind-" bc they're afraid of the rejection, so it's easier to demand "well EVERYONE SHOULD BE LIKE ME". Mhm. Learn to confront your issues. But you're not "unsafe" bc music. You're just annoyed, and you'll get over it.

In summary it really gives me "I can give you something to cry about" energy. Bc y'all swear y'all don't understand the existence of an HOA but here yall are replicating the same Karen behaviors, and y'all don't even realize (or maybe even care) how racist you sound. But why would you lmao, that makes you uncomfortable! And damnit, you have a right to comfort!!

[vermillioncrown]

@rozaceous and I are truly blessed to have you as a reader, @sunshinerotting

(replying to your post “@vermillioncrown 🫡”)

have been thinking abt your porn for like a day these thoughts are still out of order lol: needed to get (thrown) off to get back solid footing. love sex as reassurance + a tool to communicate devotion in a way not traditionally expressed w sex. also of course they were each others’ first fuck. societal ideas about virginity aside and disregarded this really was the only way to get themselves back stable. new and finished facet of their intimacy. been woven together this was just another thread

We're so happy that the purpose of the sex in this outtake was interpreted the way we intended! While Korvin does say "disruption" and articulate his thoughts behind his intent, reassurance and devotion was up to us to convey it through the scene rather than explicit dialogue or narration. It is quite difficult to portray consensual sex outside the dichotomy of romantic love vs lust because no matter what anyone says, even aroaces, we live in a society that socializes us to associate sex with certain ideas.

On average, our trained instinct guides us to those ideas. It's queer to have a different expression, and that different expression also illustrates how disconnected Allie and Korvin are from society due to their circumstances. It's also a very vulnerable act---even if we disregard the emotions (looking at some aroace talk online smh bc it's still an act with regard towards your partner, I should fucking hope, and that's still emotional vulnerability), it's still physically vulnerable. So, yes, we can take "virginity" to be instead first person they let into their shells, past their skin, in the literal sense.

​like he HAD to scatter her to get her to snap back into it and she clearly needed a mark of him inside her like. the creampies were grounding. it’s a metaphor. and also hot. fear i did not pay enough attention to the clothes thing 😔 was too busy thinking “there’s no way these two have fucked anyone before. why are they good at this” which. it was never going to be bad w them. they wouldn’t have let it personal level i found the aspecs boning to be comforting. u guys get it.

He also wants proof he is able to affect her in that he matters to her, he is considered in her choices. She wants proof that he'll trust her, that he won't leave, that his words and actions are aligned, and that she's safe for him. The creampies are everything you say 🤭 Nothing between them, complete trust at the moment and continuing forward, and hah. Oh, you'll love the contrast with the TimKorv outtake 🙂

Don't worry about the clothes thing---it's a pretty deep read. Allie and Korvin are very conscientious about their presentation, because presentation is armor. Tim notices their outfits, that they take things out to dry-cleaning, the difference between the twins' choice of outfits during the Cold War. And, of course, clothes are socioeconomic class signals, which both twins would mind, having a billionaire-in-law and going through Rich Gothamite Hell. They both treat each other's clothes with a lot of care compared to their own as an act of devotion and proof of knowing each other well (barring Korvin's tank top bc Allie was out of patience by then, but their mood was light enough to balance it out).

HAHAHAHA so like, we can't get away with talking about the "skill issue" (lack thereof) without being personal. They're SIs so. Both Roz and I agree (and I have anecdotal proof) that a mindful, solicitous partner that is inexperienced can fare better than a self-centered partner with experience. And we both read a lot of smut (par for the course with fanfic), I have a very vivid kinetic imagination and have done a lot of physical activity requiring fine motor control and body awareness, Roz's livelihood is Knowing Bodies and How They Move. And people should explore themselves and extrapolate from there.

The very high bar is a combination of ^^ the above, their immediate need to reconcile and demonstrate devotion, and their comfort with each other. They knew this was the one and only time---gotta bring the A-game. You're right in that it was never going to be bad with them.

And thank you, it means a lot to us. We want more aspec boning, we want it to be sold, not told to us. Glad you feel that we nailed it.

it IS narratively coherent it makes so much sense for them it’s another threshold to walk through it was a natural move and i love that they’re done with it and it’s comfortable. that’s such a novelty. and her getting the snacks in case he changed his mind. there’s care everywhere there’s intimacy everywhere and we knew that but i could feel the bubble start to reassert itself as soon as they get to the motel. i love when sex isn’t about sex. talking bodies fr. it’s 2 am im defo forgetting smth

For a 2am thought, this is pretty comprehensive. Written sex is rarely about the sex, or it's rarely just about the sex. Obviously, we wanted it hot and sexy but like. Character study. It's a 15k character study.

shower scene was very funny and so was them making fun of dick unprompted. 2 virgins having improbably banger sex. gotta blame batman

That's the thing with neither of them ever suspecting there's another transmigrator. You think you're cheating with prior life experience/knowledge, but the other person is just exceptional like the rest of the batfam, duh. Right? ...?

DPNF from Tim's pov is biased against Dick. The twins love Dick, he's an essential part of their lives, it's an automatic reach to mock him lol.

Oh, final thing with difference between Allie being more hung-up than Korvin over the improbable virgin killing at sex---differences between continued female socialization versus 2.0 male socialization. Allie and her circumstances make her more self-conscious, the whole thing with women always self-monitoring how they are perceived.

Korvin doesn't have female socialization in his second life that ^ guides towards that, but he's very strange for a guy that looks masculine enough because his first life was as a woman, albeit one that existed and was rewarded in predominantly male spaces as an exception. So, he has different hangups which manifests in the rabid squirrel piloting the 6'4" fuccboi currently entertaining you all.

Gender!

[mulderscully]

feeling yappy tonight sorry but one argument that i get tired is firstprince not kissing with tongue in the movie. i find this annoying because it doesn't really matter to me. i think tongue kisses look kinda gross on screen sometimes tbh, but that's me. maybe nick and taylor didn't want to kiss with tongue, but i honestly do not think that is the case (and i say this is in the least rpf way because i'm being serious) because there actually is some tongue in the paris scene, it's just quick and not really prominent. i think they probably didn't use much tongue because they were attempting to avoid an r rating. matthew said he wanted teenagers to be able to watch this etc to me it really feels like they expected/wanted pg-13 and knew that queer movies unfairly get r-rating easier. romcoms honestly rarely have as much kissing and sex as the rwrb movie does even though it isn't explicit but does it deserve an r? i don't think so. but it still got it. so me the lack of tongue is due to that and i wonder why others don't even consider it.

another thing is i feel like tongue is the last thing i really care about when i think about henry and alex kissing. yes, i assume they use tongue but tongue isn't like narratively important per se. and despite the hayescodification of society lately, kissing and sex can and does have a place in a story.

one perfect example of an in character kiss is this:

if you watch the body language here, and you know the characters, you understand and recognize what is going on. look at how nick is making henry move here: running his fingers through alex's hair, pulling him closer, basically arching his back and the look of yearning on his face. he loves alex and he knows he loves alex, and someone who read the book will see that. a casual viewer might miss it, but it's still part of the character and the performance.

you can read alex's body language too, how he surges up and doesn't know where to touch henry because he wants to touch him everywhere. for henry it's years of quiet burning, for alex it's years of repressed desire. now alex has accepted it and can't get enough. he isn't thinking much about the depth of those feelings because he just likes henry so much and feels free in that understanding.

i think the biggest scene people complain abt no tongue is in the paris scene, but look at this kiss

they're shaking. they're nervous. they're falling in love.

there isn't tongue because this scene isn't meant to be pcrnographic, it's meant to be emotional. alex has never had sex with a man, and how he's having sex with henry.

henry, who months ago, he was convinced he hated, who he thought hated him, who he was always compared to, who he had an open rivalry, who has become his best friend somehow?? of course he's shaking. and henry is having sex with someone who he loves for the first time, someone he has loved for years and who he never thought he could have and who he thinks will move on and this will have all been his only taste of love before returning to a life of boredom and sadness??? you can see that in this kiss.

it adds to the story.

and there are other examples like taylor using teeth which is a reference to one of the emails, like alex kissing that corner of henry's mouth which is also a reference to an email.

there is insight to the characters in those kisses which is why we always say we can feel the love between them. because we are seeing what is written into the script actually reflected on the screen.

so yeah idc abt tongue 🫶🏼

[pastadoughie]

Read over what was going on with anon asks and your posts, and tbh, if you are 16 and you are reaching this kind of critical thinking and actively trying to better yourself through meaningful debates and convos, you are doing god's fucking work from early. I couldn't even begin to form the kind of arguments you are articulating at your age in your posts, so fucking kudos.

I have a similar opinion of sexism being bad no matter the form it takes, patriarchy affects everyone because it imposes roles on everyone, not only women. Breaking those roles on all sides and genders should be the ultimate goal, not try to benefit from the system to become the oppressor.

In any case dude, good luck with the unavoidable influx of people who will misinterpret your posts. Also, your art is hella cool!

i think that alot of ppl just have a rlly hard time like, getting over the gut response to defend themselves when they recieve some kind of serious critisism, like, i think ppl understand on some level that sexism as a concept is stupid, but it can be hard to fully see all the nuances it takes and like, actually recognize it when its subtler

sexism is bad and when i point out that alot of you guys believe ideas that are like, really sexist then thats like, im assuming none of you are like "YEAA SEXISM RUELZZZ!!!! I HATE PEOPLE BASED ON THIER GENDOR" and u rlly rlly dont wanna be lumped into that group

its rlly normal to not wanna be mischaracterized and if you dont self identify as sexist then when someone points out sexist retoric it feels like an unfair and reductive veiw of u

and its like, you really really really need to work past that, im talking abt this stuff because i want ppl to change and be better and if you want that for yourself u have to like rlly chew on these kinds of things

i think what alot of people have issues with is like, relatability in artwork, like "of course im gonna like art with queer women in it more and find it more valueble if im a queer woman" but i think that this points to a really rigid and uphelpful veiw of gender

ive discussed before that, because the mind numbing ammount of biological differences people have theres no actual objective definition of sex or gender, its socially constructed and entirely arbitrary and subjective

i think that labels for sexuality and gender are useful shorthand in our current society though ideally we wouldnt need them, but you need to remember that these things arent rigid

butch lesbian is not a definable group, gay man is not a definable group, they are arbitrary words that mean something different for literally every different person

likewise acting like those meaningless labels somehow make some artwork more or less valueble just points to a bias against people with a certain label

like, the labels dont mean anything they shouldnt change your veiw of a work, if you resonate with a peice of work why does it matter what label is put on it? why does that affect your veiw on the peice?

and yes you are objectively going to relate to some experiences more then others, but i dont think relatability should effect how you value the work, infact id argue seeing perspectives different then your own is incredibly incredibly valueble and, if your disregarding (even subconciously) certain things because theyre made by men then that not only hurts men but it hurts you, it isolates you

maybe i didnt word that perfectly im not always the most articulate but like, i think most of the issues people are having with this are coming from me articulating things maybe not as intuatively as i could or from people refusing to properly engadge with what i have to say

idk, regarding the people accusing me of transmysogeny i just wanna say that like, I AM NOT ALLERGIC TO TALKING TO YOU ABT THIS!! i want to be better and i dont want to be mysogenistic! and if you do see concerning behavior in me i want to be told of it, you keeping these kinds of things to yourself or refusing to engadge with me when i actively am trying to be like, thourough and nuanced about things is just kinda, not productive

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

Hey! On your poll I was going back and forth between yes and secret third thing BECAUSE I do think Izzy displays homophobia in the show. However, I interpret the incident you referred to as mostly misogyny i.e. that "real men don't show feelings." I think the derogatory words and actions towards Lucius and Stede are way more homophobic, but they're connected for sure.

I think the emphasis on boyfriend is making fun of him for being emotional that a man he loves isn't there and he wanted to remind him that (to Ed's understanding) Stede didn't care enough.

Tldr - izzy is homophobic for reasons outside of this scene, but his gorilla grip on societal standards of men bleed into his view of queer men, especially those who aren't "masc" enough for him

anon my beloved i must apologize in advance bc i had a very weird and emotionally draining day today and i am very tired right now. so i don’t know that this is going to be coherent. but also i like this ask and i want to say words about it before that poll expires tomorrow so i’m just gonna slap some shit together here and hope it makes sense

so first thing’s first, i definitely agree that izzy does homophobia all over the show. the reason i picked out this scene and that line specifically is because imo “pining for his boyfriend” literally sounds like a dumb middle school boy bullying his classmates on the playground. which is to say that it sounds like the most simple-minded homophobic taunt in the world. like i always think abt this scene in the last season of the magnus archives when the main character and his boyfriend roll up to some dumb meathead bully type who goes “who’s this, your boyfriend?” and the whole fandom was like “wow i can’t believe this guy is homophobic.” bc even if the bully is literally correct and the guy is actually his boyfriend, saying “boyfriend” in that tone is saying “boyfriend” like it’s an insult. which, clearly, is homophobic.

so yeah mocking ed for the pining bit is kinda more on the “boys don’t cry” misogyny side of things like you said, but the way izzy tilts his head and draws out the first vowel in “booooyfriend” to me reads like the single most straightforward and undeniable instance of izzy being homophobic in the entire show. bc even if (and this is a big if) izzy doesn’t actually care abt ed having a boyfriend and is just trying to goad ed into being blackbeard again bc izzy needs blackbeard to feel safe, the way izzy is choosing to go about bullying ed into being blackbeard again is through grade school level homophobic taunting.

however you are not wrong that there is also misogyny going on in that scene. and that is because these things are all so deeply intertwined it’s impossible to say where one ends and where the other begins. and this is where i don’t think i’m going to be able to maintain coherency lol but i’m gonna do my best!!!

like the thing with homophobia is that at it’s core, it’s about men not doing gender right. bc gender roles in western society are a fucking shitshow and the expectations for how men and women are supposed to behave extend into every facet of people’s lives. like we all know the basic “boys don’t cry, women are caretakers, men are tough and macho, women are soft, men are hard, etc etc” stuff. but one of the biggest areas where society has strict expectations of how men and women should behave is about sexuality.

men are expected to be attracted to women, obviously. but also men are often expected to be overtly sexual. having a high sex drive is tied to many guys’s concept of their own masculinity and their sense of personal identity. like this should feel like common knowledge right, the idea that some guys build their identity around “getting bitches” or whatever?

(the societal expectations for women and sexuality are a whole other shitshow that people have written entire essays and articles and books on, but im not gonna get into that here bc we’re talking abt ofmd, and this show is focusing on challenging society’s ideas about what it means to be a man)

the other thing with gender roles, and with male gender roles specifically. is that of the two genders that western society has expectations for, manhood is seen as superior. so when a guy is unable to perform masculinity to society’s standards, he is seen as less than a man. and what’s less than a man?

a woman.

men who fail to adhere to a certain expectation of masculinity are insulted by being likened to women. it’s why guys will literally say “don’t be such a girl about it” when another guy gets emotional about something. hell, it happens to stede in the show!! calico jack calls him “the big gal,” the british describe him as “a heavyset woman in a silk dressing gown.” stede is someone whose gender presentation does not match what is expected of him At All, from his clothes to his crying to his picking flowers to just his mannerisms and how he is. and stede has faced constant ridicule because of this.

so like. it all gets real tangled together. and a lot of the time it’s hard to say which is “more” present, homophobia or misogyny. insulting a man by calling him gay, insulting a man by comparing him to a woman, those things go hand in hand. having a gorilla grip worldview on how men “should” behave leads people to policing how men, both cishet and queer, perform gender and experience attraction.

so like, izzy’s general vibe of not caring if ed has gay sex, but absolutely caring if ed bottoms during that sex and caring if ed actually falls in love and cares about a man? that concept of masculinity, which calico jack is also shown to adhere to? homophobic. just like how his treatment of stede and lucius for being “less masculine” is homophobic.

[munamania]

ok everyone i watched lemonade mouth and do revenge tonight. i wanted to share my notes from lemonade mouth or at least the highlights. (edit from later jk i posted nearly every thought soooo sorry) not much to say abt the other one it was okay. lemonade mouth is my baby though

wen is such a hater

queer as hell movie

i like that this movie doesnt talk down to its audience it's still silly but it treats each character like a full person and it's earnest

flashes into their lives to get to their destiny to meet. i heart storytelling

TURBO BLAST.

'use your voice' ok dyke. sounds like jo maskin

'this is the underground (in all caps)' oh this is so rife with queer pleasures

principal brennigan.... what does this say abt society.....

this is so like gay club queer joy i know a place moment fates colliding queer utopia

music is everything adn everything is love btw

none of the girls are in competition for any of the guys and in fact are arguably queer coded. i mean overall obv the group is

showing the power of queer joy

like MUNA

random little commercial jingle was so catchy

people that have known and paid attention to each other forever and challenge each other to be their best selves through their very existence soulmatism. olivia and wen btw

WEN IS SUCH A HATER LOSER

dynamic lighting <333

'just because you cant see the agony doesnt mean it isnt there' ok gayass

'i could start a revolution' broccoli close up. hilarious theyre just fuckin around

naomi scott brings a comfortable bisexuality to her characters. me when im just saying shit

SOMEBODY.im gonna kill myself.

HAYLEY BG VOCALS OKKKKKKKKK

'or cher' get his ass mo

stella is a true action forward activist im obsessed with her. she and hazel callahan bottoms should team up and rig the school with bombs

lemonade mouth is such a sincere true inside joke for a band name they are all so lovely. theyre my losers club

Determinate. Get determined! Revolution

bridgit mendler egot when

'i like when you smile' theyre just giddy weirdo soulmates

taking away pride?????????? (lemonade)

corporate buyouts. capitalist ownership and what that entails

control

wen who cant deal with change whos living in honor of his mother's memory and his sense of idealistic family and those rigid definitions and olivias odd broken family and beautiful unconventional relationship with her grandmother and opened up raw vulnerability that she tries to protect but exudes in her songwriting largely inspired around and by him

adult babies. ok

FAGGOT BRENNIGAN!!!!! sorry

idk if this is a strange observation but it's relieving that it's not a huge deal for the boys to go in the girl's bathroom to be supportive and lovely to their friend

lemonade. symbol of hope revolution pride also fruity

i used to live and breathe for mo's little bass shimmy

disability representation ayo

mo's back vocals okayyyyyyy also the little dance!!!!

distributing lemonade to the masses!!!!!! proletariat comrades!!!

why r they literally revolutionaries im screaming

'political tirade' 'complete'y disruptive' slayyy

'decisions i make are for the good of this school' ok fascist

flagging

Dante's pizzeria -> HELL!?!

'maybe... we do matter' 'of course we do' ok yippee gay people <3

shes so gone... i just felt so understood

naomi has such a beautiful voice. the naomis should combine naomi scott produced her own shit it would be sooooo cool

olivia being forced to accept her full grief for her mother

friends are everything btw

seeing things in the clouds... natural human inclination to find purpose in everything

'i wish my dad would ignore me' REAL. it's complicated

dad in prison - i feel like they didnt touch that sort of thing often on disney idk maybe sometimes

BRIDGIT IS THAT GIRL.

more than a band. love and community and god in other people

these are my bestest friends btw

'im not pretending to be what im not for anyone anymore' ok gayass

they are such DORKS <3

MO SLAYING EGREGIOUS CUNT IN ALL THE CHAOS

theyre all so linked together in fate and time

oh bridgit is about to slay so immensely shes amazing

bridgit mendler school of acting

gabe saporta ass outfit stella has on

THEYRE FIGHTING COPS WITH EACH OTHERRRRRRR

music center of the universe and love

theater kids <3

okay that hug made me cry

'that is the limpest wrist fist bump i have ever seen' - lydia (about charlie and his brother)

there was some coming out to your family in that hug

fucking good lighting

lemonade mouth school of acting

fucking up that guitar i cannot lie im obsessed w that performance of determinate at the end it makes me cry every time and also that guitar is soooooo

this guy is cooler than steve harrington yeah i still just have stupid beef with that stupid fandom

kiss on the cheek is so sweet <333

he brought her a kitten. he brought her a kitten. he brought her new life/a feeling of rebirth of coming into yourself and just living. not perfect but okay. they could do peeta and katniss who will follow you to your ruined home and plant a garden there. i threw my pen across the room and screamed over this btw.

SHE MET MEL LEMONADE MOUTH

queer utopia

faghag pair

charlie = afycso, naomi scott ~ dianna agron, wen ryan ross pretty odd outfit

okay goodnight <3

[deploytheboy]

The skabi masterlist

Dome shaped and loveable.mushroom

Skabi vs Andy's room

farquaad(theatre slut/nerd, softie, quote folder

Where is he_My brother.stonks

This aged so badly.volcra_fucking

Greek mythology is Greek mythology

Secret jigwise folder

Skey.professional_editor

Talk more about female oppression in patriarchal society

Jigwise 💕/Jigsaw <3333

Penode game weak

Nobody expects the canalised river

I've had enough of this dude.pennywise

Quote folder <3.mannequins

That's [it] you complete me

Robot Pigeon jesus we've all seen him

Padmé

Star wars rp

Teethie boys music

And I feel soft in this chili's tonight

Skey my little meow meow

All nut no shell/pistachio brainwave/thought pistachio/thoughts Pistachios/the use of pistachio as a verb/no thoughts pistachio empty/you just got pistachioed/pistachio bird vector

Morally grey protag_abi

Ayo 2 the sequel

I studied the curb I mastered the stomp

I appreciate the overestimation of my intelligence

Self isolating babey

Fuck you. Unlearns how to read an analogue clock.

Krogstad my beloved.gif

Holey Thursday my beloved.gif

Sorry about the blood in my mouth I was licking a peach

Indeed... The plot chickens

I contain multitudes.mulaney

Lit grids

Dolls house alignment chart

Skye 🙂

Explaining mcyt

Long live the lesbians

And the canary choked in my throat

I'm in your bathroom using your toothpaste

The concept of being loved lots and lots like jelly tots got to me alright

I am dome shaped and lovable so hot that down

Skelen

Thanks 👍

Ske

Girls trip

Hollow worms

Pussification

Don't watch private peaceful without any problems caused by alarm based issues your so sexy aha

Achilles fanart

Go to horny jail

History speaks

Cry abt it/I am

It'll be Abi Rustage running that bank

The future is many things but female is not one of them

Oh my g we would boss that so hard

We'll we'll we'll what do we have here

Oh Pablo we're really in it now

â

Tease

I'm gonna say 'me too' after u and ur partner say 'I do'

Poetic slurs

Furrycon formalwear

Haunted by the murdoch group

Vegetarian lesbians

Initial queer feelers

Does she draw funky arrows

Cry and do the lit work

Minecraft fans (hi Abi)

Gay rat wedding

Clarifying nothing and setting more work continually

I need a moment

The PAIR on this guy

Is that even a cause of Tb or was ibsen just in the mood to slut shame

I'm a pro at anal series

Female scrooge - gay thoughts head lesbian

Cat mind control powers

Love it when planes a come together

All it takes is severe humiliation

Ugly keysmash I apologise

Sketflixandchill

Tumblr ibsen discussion

Character development.same hat

I have the power of God and strong nails on my side

Cadburys crab egg

You want a mans sport? Start making fun of British politicians

Chagrin is the sexy female assassin that makes lesbian brain go brr

Simp. I know.

It was 1pm. Regular madness.

Petting the fish

Affection starved thumbs up

PIVOT word

Don't imply women are responsible for their own oppression your so sexy

Forget tragedy essays I'm already writing tragic essays

I would never want you to pass lit bb

Indeed. The plot chickens.

Politics vs gay Simpsons Anne Hathaway. We are not the same.

Bagels are scary.

Man cannot live on cereal bars alone.

Me eating my fringe toast with my fail peanut butter.

[skimblyspones]

Just preemptively putting out there in case a random sees it and gets upset or smthng: allo-aro Jim kirk is a projection thing dnsjfndkf it's a me seeing myself in him thing. The way I read his character and his relationships I see a lot of similarities to myself, especially before I realized I'm aro/spec.

The way people can talk abt romantic love, I wound up just sort of assuming it was an immediate offshoot of platonic love. And I do experience what I'd still call infatuation, I just also have found that long term romantic relationships are not what I enjoy or find comfort in; infatuation for me comes from envisioning closeness with someone, oftentimes closeness that doesnt even mecessitate romance. At the same time, I'm really fucking lonely fjdkgksjgdk and it's still v not normalized in our society to have close friends u have sex with without some expectation of some level of romance, and bc friendship and romance for me have always been abt the same, I struggle to make friends to begin with. I think FWB and situationship are good useful terms but there also just. Needs to be something else there, I feel. QPP is great but only covers one aspect.

Anyway all that to say fjsjfndkfnej for me Jim's sifting through multiple love interests a week + his loneliness, to me, feels like he's stuck running up against his internalized amatonormativity*. There are a few exceptions I think, namely Lenore and Rayna, but a lot of them, I think, were really strong platonic attachments and/or, yes, primarily sexual attraction. He wants love and to be loved, yet continually finds no luck in romance. It's implied it's bc of his devotion to the Enterprise, but at what point does that shift from explanation to excuse; to prevent the uncomfortable self reflection?

Imo, that's also why I do still like to think of his relationship with Spock, while absolutely queer at its core, as a friendship, on Kirk's end at least. I especially like the potential of Kirk pining after a romantic attraction, tbh. Wanting to want spock in that way*, bc if he were to develop these feelings for anybody, surely, at this point, he should for spock. But he doesn't, at least, hes not confident that he feels anything more than strong friendship, and he doesnt want to ruin the bond they have. As I've said before, my favored interpretation of spirk is as a model of courtly love: not fully romantically reciprocated, blurring the lines of platonic and romantic.

*-there are a lot of ways to internalize amatonormativity and a lot of ways that can play into your life but in my case and how I like to think is Jim's case, it's in wanting, or at least thinking you want, that ideal romantic partnership; monogamous, dedicated, passionate. Which is all well in good to read about in fiction, but anyone can tell you that real life romance is messy and hard, and, speaking from experience, romantic stuff can get overwhelming and stressful fast if you're not feeling it. And in the end all you really want is probably just like. Friends? Like a friend group? Some hookups as well? But you also want what society is telling you you ought to strive for, that being romance.

Anyway yeah gjdjfndkf there you go. Loredump on me by way of explaining new kirk hc djsjfnsnfndns

[transmasc-wizard]

hello givem e the serious thoughts about movies abt trans ppl and movies for transp pl

@multi-lefaiye asked: Hi hello I would be Interested in your thoughts on the trans characters vs trans movies post

@wherearetheplants asked: hihi second ask fo the day i wanna hear ur thoughts on that other post

i got all these asks literally in the span of 3 seconds skdhkjsdfhk. i am glad my thoughts are wanted here

so my Serious Thought is essentially that it's really, really bad that "media for trans people" and "media with trans people in them" does not have very much overlap, and really in general, "medias for queer people" and "media with queer people in them" does not have much overlap, at least in popular media.

The depiction of queer people in media, especially popular film, never actually seems to be for queer people. You know that comic where the butch lesbians go "why are there no people like us on TV?" in reference to a TV generic straight couple, then years later go "why are there no people like us on TV?" in reference to a TV generic lesbian couple? Yeah.

Queer people in so much media are... declawed, I guess. Playing into the respectability politics look of "we're just like you!". There is rarely any reference to queer history, queer culture, queer complexity. It's just two men who are married but functionally act like any straight couple, or a token lesbian, or a trans woman described with the whole "was a man now is a woman" thing.

Most of those characters are not queers. They're LGBT, don't get me wrong, and they are technically queer, but they're not queer queer. They don't have any interest in breaking down binaries, questioning society's laid-out rules, fucking up the system. They just want to be treated like cishets. Gay as in happy instead of queer as in fuck you.

Don't get me wrong; LGBT characters in TV are important. To reference that specific post that sparked this, trans people are portrayed in a way that explains us to cis people like said cis people are 3 years old, a very basic and easy to swallow depiction. LGBT+ people exist as any other people as an act of normalization and it helps queer people who didn't realize queer was an option. But... it's just? Not for the rest of us?

Because if you already know you're queer, you're not going to actually get much from being taught what bisexual means. It's nice to see, but it's not super... idk, easy to deeply connect to. And I genuinely think movies that don't have a single canon queer character but are about being labeled a freak and proud of it are more queer and more for queer people than ones that just show some middle class white gay couple with 2 kids and a dog.

That's where the "movies that aren't about trans people but definitely for trans people" part comes in, because they're the next best thing to movies that are about trans people and for trans people. If I can't have both (though we really need ones that are both), I'd rather have one that's at least for me, whether the creator meant it to be or not.

A movie about self-examination and changing yourself to be happier, even in the face of adversity? Queer film! It doesn't matter if the MC is cis or not. A show about discovering something about you that is deeply hated (like, say, being a magical being), and saying fuck you, that's who I am? Queer show! A book about finding friends who love you for all your eccentricities and all your parts that don't quite fit in? Queer book!

Because even if it is not specifically about being a lesbian, or bisexual, or trans, or asexual, or whatever, that media is queer. When you're queer, you spend a lot of time just being who you are in the face of a world that hates you. Media that shows similar journeys is always going to be deeply, deeply queer because of that.

[first-only]

How do you get over that 'what if I'm wrong' fear? (specifically with queer discourse, fiction discourse, and para/kink discourse)

I do get that fear a lot, and while I'm confident I'm not wrong in my opinions, I think the amount of anti [blanks] make me question myself

check your priorities - so what if youre wrong about some detail? about the whole thing? will the world end? are you more comfortable this way, and feel happier and more satisfied in your community and view of yourself? does it cause you more harm to believe this? is it actually affecting anyone what you believe and how? are you the bully in just existing in your convictions, or is the vocal opposition the ones who are tearing communities apart over personal opinions? even if the butterfly effect is real, is it your responsibility to kill off all butterflies in your country so there's no tornado on the other end of the world? would that not cause more ecological harm?

check your sources - the best way to disparage fear of being wrong is to confirm with facts that you're not. it's usually conviction that makes people comfortable, and the best type of convincing for someone so inclined, is with verified information. I personally look for sources from people and places ive already verified i can trust. i check new points of view and information with people who study the topic or are personally versed in it (i will once again point at fiction-is-not-reality2). Another very practical way is to look at sources from "both sides" so to say. For example, a study by Dolf Zillmann reports test subjects having increased levels of aggression after seeing violent media (abstract link, text link), while a study by Margot Kuttschreuter reports no correlation between violent media and aggressive behaviour (abstract link, text link). And now we need to look at those studies. Kuttschreuter's is a longitudal study (ie studying the phenomena over time, not in a single instance) and is conducted with 466 child participants, of roughly equal gender numbers, with outside contributing factors explicitly controlled for. Zillmann studied 63 male undergraduates of the same university, a single time, and with no control over aggression states before the experiment. Zillmann's study is from 1971, Kuttschreuter 's from 1992. Zillman is born in 1935 in Alabama, known for his anti-porn views, and publishes "studies" and articles of the sorts of "the effect of pornography on the nuclear family" (since we're talking abt being wrong lets check /this/ view a little bit - the nuclear family is a relatively new concept born by industrialization and capitalism, its revered status, despite its MANY downsides, children safety included, is primarily kept up by authoritarian politicians and religious leaders. why should something as old as humanity like pornography cede way in order to keep up this new-age community-destructive concept?). Kuttschreuter is a professor at the University of Twente in the Netherlands, specializes in psychology of conflict, risk and safety, and has been president of the Society for Risk Analysis Europe. And let's look at the studies' results too, whats the conclusions? Kuttschreuter concludes with no duality, that under controlled factors, "The hypothesis that television violence viewing leads to aggressive behaviour could not be supported". Zillman's study is written in more academic language, you can read it for yourself in the links, but his conclusion is basically "after consuming content that is exciting, test subjects show an elevated level of excitement". Groundbreaking, truly. You will note that this 'exciting' content isnt necessarily violent, and physiological excitement does not always transfer to aggressive behaviour, let alone long term. You need to look at what the objective results are and how the author presents them to you, what they want you to believe. So if you lose a game and get frustrated, does this make you an abuser? And is this only media related? What if you stub your toe and scream? Is this a predictor for abusive behaviour?

putting the cut here as its getting long but i do have more to say

and also putting under check your sources, i will add /check the arguments/. if one side's arguments are "your thoughts somehow influence people who dont even know you" and "fictional children have the same rights as real children" and the other side's are "bodily autonomy is a human right and behavioral autonomy is part of that" and "personal boundaries end where another person's begin" and "active targeted intentional tangible harm is not the same as having a hobby" then studies are sometimes not necessary to come to a coherent conclusion. A study on the difference between a fictional character and a child would be interesting tho. "we tried to conduct an experiment on sasuke uchiha but he was not found for comment" jkfsjf

3. build an internal solid system of belief - i think this is of critical importance and a lot of 'proshippers' havent done it either. That means believing on foundational level the concept that builds other convictions. For example if your belief system says that harm is the only measure of morality, and active targeted intentional tangible harm is the only measurable indicator for harm then believing thought crimes would be irrational for you. That means yes, incest fic and underage shipping are effectively harmless. But that also means that 'racism against fictional characters' is also effectively harmless. This seems to be a point of particular content thats why i mention it. And if your belief system says that artists and authors are free to express themselves and share their stories as they see fit, then yes absolutely fan artists should not be held accountable for what they fancy. But so shouldnt popular and published authors, for daring to put a hot woman in their video game.

4. honestly, most importantly. Learn a little bit of hedonism. Learn some i dont give a fuck. Learn some i live for myself and my own comfort will not be sacrificed for someone else's. My body and mind are my own to with as i please. - Listen. I'm a smoker. There's endless, cohesive, correct, factual research on the harm of smoking. I dont care. This is my body and these are my rights to destroy it. I dont care about concern trolling or people trying to tell me it makes /them/ uncomfortable how i treat myself. The government doesnt have rights to tell me no, so no one else does (and if the govt did have those rights then the people wouldnt take it - prohibition era america for reference). Even /if/ fiction had an averse effect. Even /if/ it did affect everybody else. This is their responsibility. In the same way i will smoke in allowed places in public, i will keep posting my fic and art. It's other people's responsibility to not see me as cool as fuck while smoking and taking it up too. It's their own right to do or not to do. If someone has an averse reaction to smoke they sit in the non-smokers section. If someone has a bad reaction to fic, they filter tags. Even if fic "rotted the brain", cigarettes do so at twice the speed and damage. And i smoke unfiltered cigarillos. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ what i put in my body and brain is my business. what other people want to see and do about it is theirs. meddling into my business is where the line is.

[an-android-in-a-tutu]

your opinions abt jekyll and hyde intrigue me. tell me more (begging)

Alright SO I wrote a very impassioned essay about this in 12th grade but I haven't read the book since so my apologies if anything about this is inaccurate since I'm going off of memory here, but I feel like the idea of Jekyll and Hyde as alternate personalities truly does not hold water.

First off, when Jekyll is making his potion at the beginning I want to make it very clear that his intention is not to eradicate evil from his nature. He wants it gone from him but to be clear he does not care where it goes, I recall pretty clearly a quote where he was essentially fantasizing about how if he could just take those dark parts of himself and get them out then they could "go on their way" and indulge themselves and he wouldn't be bothered by them anymore. I think this is a key distinction because this is not the goal of a good man. An actually moral person restrains their worst impulses because of the harm they would cause, but Jekyll makes it clear with these musings that he doesn't care about that sort of thing, he just cares about how his bad actions would reflect badly on him. He's a man of some wealth and social status but to retain that status he has to act according to certain standards he would clearly rather eschew.

And then when he creates his potion he gets his wish precisely. It doesn't transform him mentally, while he talks about Hyde as a separate person in his writings that's clearly a way of distancing himself from the crimes he committed as Hyde and trying to save face, at no point does it really seem as though he couldn't control himself, and there are no gaps in his memory. The potion simply transforms him physically. It makes him anonymous, frees him from the expectations of his social standing and lets him act however he likes.

And even if you were to take him at his word and consider Hyde to be a separate entity, Jekyll does nothing to hamper or try to contain him and everything to enable him, he sets up a house and an allowance for Hyde and ways to disguise his comings and goings. The first part of the story is from the point of view of a friend of Jekyll's who's worried he's being blackmailed because of his entanglement with this obviously shady character.

And then ultimately, his actions catch up with him. When he's out as Henry Jekyll he starts thinking "wicked thoughts" about a woman he sees in public and the next thing he knows he's transformed into Hyde, and pretty soon he discovers that he can't transform back. And that's what serves as the full confirmation that Hyde never existed and it was only ever Jekyll: The memoirs that compose the last portion of the story are written after this point, and they are fully from the perspective of Jekyll, he hasn't been taken over by an evil alternate self: he's been unmasked. The anonymous face he used to commit his crimes has become his face and he can no longer escape the consequences of his actions! If anything, all the potion ever did was reveal Jekyll's repulsive true face, and ultimately he stopped being able to "Hyde" behind the veneer of a respected doctor lmao.

Anyway Jekyll and Hyde serves far better as a vehicle for exploring & critiquing the abuses of people in positions of power, Jekyll being a respected doctor with an ugly secret, than the dichotomy of good and evil imo. It also makes for a GREAT vehicle for a story about repression. Like Henry Jekyll's repressed urges included beating some dude to death with a cane, but not everything people feel the urge to hide in a restrictive society is wrong. What if some of those urges you're stuffing deep deep down are actually okay to express? What if some of them really really aren't, but you're too full of shame to know the difference anymore? I'm just saying you could queer it up like crazy I bet. There's room for exploration there that's more in keeping with the original conceit of the story.

Then again I am just some guy and everyone is allowed to do whatever they want with no obligation to listen to me because I am often wrong about things. But that's my take anyway.

[housecatclawmarks]

It literally is your responsibility to acknowledge your male privilege when you are a man. You don’t get out of that responsibility by being a trans man. I don’t get out of that responsibility by being a trans man. I get that if you don’t pass as cis you won’t be treated as male in every situation bc I only pass abt 50% of the time but the thing is male privilege doesn’t just apply when people think ur cis lmao. It definitely doesn’t just apply in cishet spaces. When people see us as men, trans or otherwise, they treat us like men. And in a patriarchal society that means there is an implicit privilege that comes with that whether we want it or not. Arguing that ur oppression cancels out ur male privilege is absolutely bs when there is misogyny present in pretty much every oppressed, marginalized group in this country. And the thing is I fucking KNOW that you know this, because I am a trans man myself and I can guarantee that if you’ve ever sought gender affirming healthcare, your male privilege has helped you. If you’ve ever tried to socialize in a trans inclusive queer space, your male privilege has helped you. When you’re literally just walking down the street, it’s helping you. That doesn’t mean that you aren’t gonna face barriers and discrimination trying to get hrt or hormones. It doesn’t mean you aren’t going to encounter transphobia from lgb people. It doesn’t mean you won’t have to deal with street harassment. But what it DOES mean is that we 1) do not have to deal with the extra shit that trans women have to deal with and 2) we are literally more likely to be taken seriously, more likely to be respected, and more likely to have our fuck ups condoned by other men. There is a responsibility to being a man and that responsibility is holding yourself accountable, especially when we are men in a marginalized, oppressed community bc what that means is we also have a responsibility to stand with and uplift all of our people. Your little boys club isn’t doing that shit, not even for all the trans men you claim to be advocating for. You transitioned with SOME awareness of this shit. Follow through!

[syekick-powers]

i know i just reblogged a huge fucking post ranting about the whole “queer is a slur” bullshit but my personal thoughts are just. the post didn’t address one thing that’s been bothering me abt the whole queer discourse that i need to get off my chest.

 the absolute most annoying motherfuckers who say they don’t like queer are the ones who say they dislike it because “it means weird and strange and other.” like. yeah. of course it does. and i wear the fact that i am “weird and strange and other” as a badge of goddamn pride. even before i knew i was not straight and not cis, my ADHD meant that everyone around me treated me as weird and strange and other. my peers did not like me when i was a kid. i had almost no friends growing up, and those friends i did make either were only friends with me for a couple years, or they backstabbed me and stole from me and abandoned me. i have always, always not fit in with others, from the very beginning.

you may recoil from a word that implies strangeness, but for me, finding an identity label that celebrates and embraces the fact that i am weird and different is a goddamn good thing. i will never fit in among “normal” society, no matter how hard i try, because my very personality is “weird and strange and other”. and the queer community says that that’s a good thing, that i am fine the way i am, that i don’t have to change myself to fit some arbitrary societal definition of “normal”.

maybe to you, the idea of using a label that displays an unwillingness to conform to normality is a bad thing. but your experiences are not goddamn universal. some people are proud of the fact that they are different, and want to embrace it and not let society forget that them not fitting in to the expectation of normal is something that they are proud of and actively choose, not a shameful admission of defeat. maybe to you, the idea of saying “yeah i am different from you” to cis and straight people is scary, because your whole method of normalizing non-straight attraction and gender variance is by saying “we’re as normal as you are!” but i don’t believe that we need to be considered “normal” to be accepted. normality is a strangling, deeply limiting concept that inevitably is used as a tool to oppress minorities. to the cishet people who hate us, none of us are fucking normal, not even the most conforming, “polite”, upper-middle-class cis gays with a picket fence around their yard. it’s not an admission of defeat to say “i’m not normal and that’s okay”, it’s a declaration of pride (aka the whole point of pride month--or is pride only for the cis white gays and lesbians who can pass as straight in public?), it’s yelling to the ones who hate us “no, i’m not normal, because your definition of normal is stupid and bad and i refuse to label myself under this definition because it shouldn’t even exist.”

you don’t have to like calling yourself queer. everyone who isn’t straight and cis has certain words that they don’t want to hear. i get that. but shit-talking queer because “i don’t like that the etymology implies otherness” just tells me that you’re willing to throw people under the bus because being acceptable to cis straight people is more important to you than anyone who isn’t cis or straight (whether they’re queer or not) being able to express themselves and their sexuality/gender freely. it tells me that you think that perceived normality is more important than freedom. and that means that you’re no fucking ally of mine.

not gay as in happy, but queer as in FUCK YOU.

[fatsmyname]

this is probably gonna sound weird but ur blog is great and um. its great to see lgbt ppl who take gender how they want to including in ways some ppl think are contradictory. but he/him or he/they lesbians are super cool. y'all kinda inspiring. i worry less than i used to abt what cis ppl think of me or what my gender is supposed to be like. so thanks for being cool. sincerely a not lesbian he/they dude

Hey!!! Not weird at all and I really appreciate ur super kind words!!!

As a queer person I fully embrace queerness in every aspect of my life including my gender fucky identity. I feel like people get really confused when they see butches and masc folk teeter between two labels and are even enraged by this! Even other lgbt people get enraged by this!!! It’s really sad honestly and just shows how much these people continue to impose binaries on others.

There are lesbians who identify as ftm and lesbianism. There are lesbians who use the men’s bathroom and to other people in society, are seen as… men! And they like that! And I think that ambiguity really bothers people. Especially when we use he/him pronouns. I mostly resonate with butch elders who want to be seen as men but are lesbians. I feel like people get scared by that sentence because they think that just because everyone else sees you as a man, you are one. But it’s more nuanced than that. And, contrary to what most people think, it doesn’t drive other lesbians away from us! In fact I think it makes us more desirable and wanted by other lesbians. The butch4fem dynamic is a beautiful one and there have been plenty of those relationships that existed with the butch being literally known as the “man”.

Another thing I find super interesting (and relate a lot to as someone who is also butch4butch) is that butch4butch relationships and dynamics look a lot like gay male dynamics! And I think that’s so fucking neat. Our innate masculinity and attraction to others masculinity is so strong that we perceive our love and sexuality similar to that of gay men. In fact there are butches who enter sexual relationships with transmen because of this! Does this make the butch any less of a lesbian? No! And it doesn’t invalidate the transman’s identity either. If you want to read more about this particular dynamic (because I find that it confuses people more than anything) please read Of Catamites and Kings by Gayle Rubin. It’s a great read and one that I wish more people had access to.

Sorry this is long haha but yes!!! You should worry less about what people think of your gender and just do whatever the hell makes you feel comfortable! That’s what I’ve been doing and it’s soooo liberating. There are so many intersections of the queer experience and I think we’d be horrible to continue to squeeze obviously queer people into more binaries just because people have a strict idea of what gender or lesbianism should look like (among other things too, not just lesbianism)! N ee way if u read all this thanks lol i love u