#the sun and the star critique

[devils-little-sista]

TSATS is hilarious to me. They give Will a whole book to help us really get to know him as a character and a chance for him to be a more developed character. And instead we get a whole book of him being useless and dragging Nico down and forcing Nico to carry his pathetic arse for the whole book. Instead of making him a more developed character it just made me dislike him even more for being such a waste of space for an entire book.

Saaaaaaaaaaaaaammmmme dude. You just summarized what tsats was at its core. It’s such a shame that the idea of the sun and the star and Will Solace had so much potential it could have been amazing if it was done right. Will could have been amazing. He was amazing before Mark and Rick fumbled him And instead we got this dumpster fire. Such a shame.

And a point that I haven’t seen talked about enough is Nico being pressured to come out to the whole camp felt so wrong

the whole scene of how the dryads kinda outed Nico to the whole camp or at least pressured him to come out randomly with no warning at all. That really did not sit right with me at all. it almost felt like Nico was being outed again or very much pressured to come out because of the crowd expected an announcement from him. Like I get that the dryads made a social blunder and misinterpreted what Nico asked of them. It’s possible Nico might not have been all that clear. But like. Nico coming out to a full crowd like that especially so soon after BoO. D I D. N O T. S I T. R I G H T. W I T H. M E. It would have better if that whole thing was not written. Or at least if Nico had bailed out it of that situation and just grew the balls to privately ask Will out himself.

Because Nico’s always been very short and to the point with things. The type of guy to do his own work for himself. He once said something like “he didn’t like working with other people because they were always cramping his style” in BoO. Sure he could be trying to branch out and make friends. But I don’t think he’d trust a bunch of random dryads he barely knows with this kind of thing. If he was gonna ask anybody else to help him set up something as serious and a first date with Will it would be his trusted friends. Hazel Jason Reyna Hedge.

Also the whole thing about Nico being pressured to come out somehow helped other queer kids in the camp. Like first of all that’s not Nico’s responsibility especially not when he was still dealing with internalized stuff for himself. And second of all. It’s a Greek camp. With a whole bunch of kids there and that whole scene took place during summer time when they are the most packed. 100-200 campers. In New York. Theres gotta be at least a couple other out queer kids in that camp. (Probably more than a couple tbh).

The whole scene pressuring Nico to come out to and ask Will out didn’t make sense and felt so wrong and weird. Amongst a bunch of other things too. But this is the one that was on my mind at the moment. There are many other things about tsats that felt so wrong and I may be too sleep deprived to rant about them now

[oh-hush-its-perfect]

i feel like a lot of people forget that rick riordan didn't always write middle-grade books. he wrote murder mysteries way before pjo was conceived. he switched his target demographic once, and he can do it again. he changes his audience ever-so-slightly for each book anyway. like, sea of monsters and battle of the labyrinth were in the same series but appealed to two different audiences. mcga was decidedly not for ages 7-10, given the sheer amount of violence and the fact that the characters occasionally lightly swear (i.e. "damn," "jackass," "bastard") and reference real issues (cultural erasure, police brutality, ableism, islamophobia, transphobia, etc.). i'm not saying he should have shifted his target demographic while writing tsats, but i'm saying it's plausible that he could have, and fans who thought he would aren't exactly delusional.

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Fallen Thorns

dark urban fantasy coming-of-age

follows a boy settling into university, when after a date (that he didn’t even want to go on) turns bad he’s made into a vampire

as he settles into his new existence and the local vampire community - while they try to find who’s been leaving bodies across the city - he discovers that there’s something different and darker within him

aroace neurodivergent MC

[nicoisastar]

i’m so ready for tsats but what i’m not ready for is looking through the tag to see [redacted] shippers criticizing & demonizing every little nico and will interaction in the book 😪

[littlemissmentallyunstable]

yeah can I request another one

thanks for your request!! sorry it took me so long to complete, there’s been a bit of a list as of late. here is another jameson x actress reader fic, hope you enjoy 🤍🤍

title: cheers rich boy

pairing: jameson hawthorne x reader

synopsis: you are an actress attending an event when a certain Hawthorne catches you off guard

warnings:

a/n: hope you enjoy reading 🤍🤍 apologies it took me AGES

tag list: @tornqdowarnings @whatsamongus @wish-i-were-heather @inmyheaddd @never-enough-novels @sweetlikeanangel @lxvebelle @xoxo-vee @emelia07 @f4iry-bell @zaraaaabear @thoughtdaughter3 @benny1989fredd @elysianwayy77 @maybxlle @sheisntyou @anintellectualintellectual

Your bodyguard opens the door of your limo and you step out onto a blood red velvet carpet. The startling flashes of cameras are nothing to you now, paparazzi have become a common occurrence that you’ve gotten used to. You tentatively take your bodyguard’s extended arm, barely gripping it as the flashes increase. You smile, posing for a few shots, ignoring the thousands of questions being screamed at you.

“Are you dating anyone?”

“How much were you paid on your latest movie?”

“Are you pregnant?”

“I think I’m in love with you!”

“How many men have you slept with?”

“You look gorgeous!”

“Look over here! My camera!”

“I WANT TO HAVE YOUR BABIES!!”

You fight the urge to roll your eyes at that last request. You follow your bodyguard into the large oak doors, with some sort of elaborate gold leaf design decorating them. He let your arm go and gave you a nod, as he skulked away. This is just another function for the rich and famous, nothing too special. You were used to them by now. They came easily and never made much of a memory. You had to show up, smile, make small talk, then leave. Simple.

Gracefully you walk through the doors, your navy blue gown trailing behind you a little. Ripples of silky fabric looking like a midnight waterfall, long and entrancing. Your head is held high, radiating the confidence you’d earned from years in this field. Now it was like second nature. Heads turned, eyes widened and fixated on you, smiles were shot in your direction. You are used to turning heads when you enter a room.

You acknowledge the ones you feel necessary and make your way to an area that looks the most isolated from the people. A few women you vaguely recognised approach you, taking your out of your princess moment.

“Your performance in ‘the high of love’ was simply exquisite,” one says, clutching to her heart.

You try not to cringe thinking about how you could never watch that movie back without critiquing your every move.

“Yes and in ‘opposites attract’,” another adds, “that was phenomenal!”

That one was even worse, you’d starred in that when you were only seventeen and quite new in the business.

“Thank you ladies, it’s so kind of you to say,” you smile, “I do try to give a good performance and I’m glad you enjoyed.”

They both give a polite nod and you take that as your chance to get away. Small talk had never really been your forte, much less small talk with the rich and famous, who usually weren’t the most interesting people to hold conversation with.

You make your way towards a casual champagne tower is perched in the centre of the large room and take a second to breathe in the surroundings. The room feels like a ballroom. Large glass windows that display the setting sun that splashes the sky in oranges, pinks and yellows. A million dollar chandelier hung in the centre, made up on expensive crystals and diamond-encrusted metal swirls.

You plan to stay as long as it take to get to the first speech and then sneak out the back when nobody was looking, it made it easier to avoid paparazzi then as well. Two birds, one stone. You spot a reasonably lonely area near a cabinet that was no doubt filled with precious and highly pricey antiques. But as you make your way over someone catches your eye.

People don’t catch your eye. Ever. But a mysterious man in a suit has. He’s gorgeous and probably dirt rich seen as he’s wearing an Armani suit, a deep ebony colour, that contrasted well with his eyes. His hair was dark, luscious and a little unruly but somehow he made it work. You couldn’t look away.

Why? That was what was bothering you the very much. Why on earth was some man at this function catch your eye and then further still play on your mind? It’s unlike you. You weren’t there type to sit around gawking at boys at events, you were headstrong, independent and didn’t need a man.

Mid thought, you look up just as he does. Harsh eye contact ensues. The green is like some sort of hypnosis that made you feel like a marionette. So alluring, so compelling. The connection so strong it felt unbreakable. Except it wasn’t. He looks away, unbothered. A feeling stirs in your stomach, an ignited spark of undignified annoyance. People don’t do that to you. They don’t turn their back unbothered, at least not your face. You have a reputation. People stopped and stared, people begged for your photograph, people cared. What was his deal?

You attempt to work out who he was. He was obviously famous or dating someone famous, which strangely you hoped he wasn’t, or he wouldn’t have been invited. You oddly recognise the parts of his face. The sharp jawline, angled nose, bold green eyes. But where from?

You were curious. Too curious.

Subtly you make your way towards the bar, close to the corner he is standing in. You hate yourself for secretly hoping he’ll notice and make his way over. You turn around to give him a second glance. Did he have to be so beautiful?

He makes eye contact and your heart suddenly picks up its pace, irritating you. You shouldn’t care this much that your body isn’t control of itself. You look him up and down and turn away. You could swear you’d seen a flicker of a smile of his face as your turned but it was too quick to be sure.

“One martini please,” you order with your polite smile plastered on your face.

“Make that two.”

You raise an eyebrow as the mystery man appears by your side. So you had gotten his attention.

“They’re on me,” he offers.

“I don’t need you to pay for me,” you tell him bluntly.

“Believe me I know that,” he smirks, “think of it as a gesture.”

“What kind of gesture?” you say, narrowing your eyes.

“One of honourable intention,” he assures you.

After a few moments of silent pondering you silently nod in agreement as the bartender rushes off. You can feel the man’s eyes pinned to you, but you don’t want to give into the temptation of looking back.

“Nice party,” he comments.

You cave and look back towards him, “quite,” you agree

“Are you here with anyone?” he asks.

“I don’t need anyone,” you reply sharply, more defensive than yours intended to come a cross.

“I’m sure you don’t,” he says the smile in his voice as well as on his face, he’s amused, “I’m here with my brother but I seem to have lost him.”

“Don’t you want to go and find him?” I wonder aloud.

“He’ll find his own way, he’s very resilient like that,” he explains.

The bartender comes back with the martinis at that moment and the man pays. Oddly you find yourself letting him. It’s nice being taken care of every once in a while. He slides a glass towards you, as you notice how the lighting made his green eyes a little bolder, fiercer.

“Enjoy moviestar,” he nods, a lopsided grin on his face.

“Cheers rich boy,” you say, with a whisper of a smile.

You take a swig from the glass. The refreshing burst of lemon hitting you before the strong gin sends the warmth into your chest.

He glances at you slightly, “I’m Jameson.”

“Jameson…” you prompt.

“Hawthorne,” he clarifies.

Hawthorne. Of course. It all made sense now. His sleek demeanour, his wicked smile, his addictive eyes. You remain neutral faced, not portraying what you thought for him to analyse. Hawthornes tended to do that.

“I’m-“

“I know exactly who you are,” he smiles, “how could anyone not with those eyes?”

A fluttery feeling invades your stomach, an unwanted guest in your body. You didn’t feel like this over people, especially not a man.

“My eyes?” you ask stupidly, as if in some sort of concussion-provoked daze.

“They’re breathtaking,” he compliments.

Red flushes through your cheeks and your face heats up, despite you not wanting it to. You try and ignore the compliment and not get so flustered by two words said by a sexy man in a suit.

“Then why did you look away from them so quickly earlier?” you challenge.

“Oh easy,” Jameson smirks with a shrug, “mind games.”

“Mind games?”

He nods, a wide smile on his face with a sparkling eyes, that send a twinge of annoyance down your spine.

“I don’t appreciate being toyed with,” you say in a disapproving tone.

“But I got your attention didn’t I?” he replies.

You feel like your tongue has been cut out as words don’t seem to remember how to form words.

“Would you have approached me otherwise?” he asks with a smirk.

“That doesn’t matter,” you say sharply, lying to myself as well as Jameson.

He quirks a brow, “doesn’t it?”

Yet again you find yourself scrambling for words like an incompetent idiot. Being at a loss for words was such an unfamiliarity it felt foreign. Why did he have this effect on you?

“So how about we get out of here?” he suggests, with a wink which I can only interpret as flirty.

You look at him, “just leave?”

“What? You’ve never pulled a runner on one of these tireless events?” Jameson chuckles, taking another sip of his martini.

“Of course I have,” you roll my eyes, “the bathroom window is my go to.”

It was true. The easiest way to slip away from these things unnoticed were bathroom windows, no one sees you leaving.

“Excellent so you already have the skill,” he replies, flashing me a grin, “what do you say we put it to the test?”

You pause for a few beats and then make the impulsive decision.

“Where were you thinking to go?” you ask, an eyebrow raised sceptically.

“Come with me and you’ll find out,” he smiles, face millimetres from mine.

You glance around, looking over your shoulder. No one was watching. It couldn’t hurt.

“You’re on Hawthorne,” you murmur, taking his hand.

a/n: if you haven’t read it already, there is another jameson x actress reader fic called starstruck and similarly a grayson x singer reader fic called paparazzi

TIG masterlist

[cerebralisis]

It’s still not clear to me if Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me was titled after Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf by Edward Albee, but that is absolutely where my mind went. I wanted to explore the connection, so I read the play over the weekend, and it has some cool parallels.

Parallel 1: The play is full of TTPD buzz words:

“You have a poetic nature.. a Dylan Thomas-y quality that gets me right where I live.”

“I wasn’t the albatross… you didn’t have to take me to get the prize or anything like that.”

“I do not pick flowers in the blink. I have never robbed a hothouse without there is a light from heaven.”

Parallel 2: The movie adaptation stars Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. Others have done great analyses of the way Taylor has referenced these two in her work, so I’ll leave that rabbit hole alone and simply say that we know Taylor has read about them (see below) and used them as inspiration - beyond just the one line in Are You Ready For It.

Parallel 3: Most interesting to me, the main themes of the play are about critiquing social conventions and blurring the lines between reality and illusion. The main couple spends the evening telling their guests stories about themselves and sharing information about their lives, but as the night goes on we start to realize that it’s hard to know which of these stories are real and which are made up. We can’t tell what’s fact or fiction, and we eventually learn that they do this because they’re afraid to face their own fears and inadequacies. (I’ll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirror). After the play reaches its dramatic climax, Liz Taylor’s character finally resigns herself to let go of all the illusions and falsehoods she’s created and live in the truth, as scary as that is for her.

This line from one of the characters stood out to me: “And the west, encumbered by crippling alliances, and burdened with a morality too rigid to accommodate itself to the swing of events, must… eventually… fall.”

I swear, every single literary reference packed into Taylor’s work is telling us the same story in a million different ways. I think our girl just wants to leave it all behind and be her authentic self.

[thequeenofcupps]

VENTURE DATING HCS PT.2

A/N: Hiii it’s me again! I saw that there was a drought of ‘venture x reader’ stuff so I decided to add more! I hope you enjoy! :D also this is a fem!reader but it can gn if you want!

CW: some swearing (coming from me), crocs, me saying ‘y’all” way to much 

♡Ok so for starters if you work at Overwatch and they’re there with you they like to sneak into your room after lights out and just talk with you while you’re drawing, on your phone, or just laying down or just cuddle with you

♡they’re an avid collector of calico critters, their ass has a whole goddamn playset with a shit ton of calico critters that they collected when they were younger.

 Sometimes they get some and gives some to you so now y’all have critter that are married you just carry them around and you both act like it’s your child

♡they’re usually outside just like sitting out there reading, gardening, or just plain out just enjoying the sun, so sometimes they just beg you to come outside with them (obviously you do) and y’all just like enjoying the sun, sunset and stars while watching a movie with you (*cough* *cough*  studio ghibli *cough*)

♡if you don’t work with them via the Wayfinder Society they usually ask their boss or coworkers (idk man sue me) if they can bring you (they usually say yes) and that’s your vacation with them

Also if they find a really pretty crystal or rock or fossil they give them to you <3

♡you know that trope ‘overdressed gf and underdressed bf’? Yeah that you guys. You’re the overdressed gf and they’re the underdressed partner like you’d be wear a gorgeous dress or a beautiful outfit and they’re wearing a oversized shirt and some jorts with crocs (except on date night they go all out like wear a suit)

♡they like to spoil you ROTTEN Cuz ik damn well the Wayfinders Society pays hella good, 

Like if you guys go out to eat they surprise you with an expensive restaurant that probably has a 1 year wait limit (they planned that date before they even asked you out).

See something you like, like an expensive purse/wallet? Boom, it's yours! Wanna eat at an expensive sushi place? Say no more! They’re already made reservations! Wanna go on an arcade date? Done and done (they also won you a big ass plush)!

♡ Also you know that one post I made? The “In honor of venture unfortunately not getting a summer/lifeguard skin here’s this lil scenario I made” one? Yeah so one day y’all went to the beach as a date and you’re just mindlessly putting some on you and then you put some on sloan and after you’re done THEYRE FUCKING SPRINTING INTO THE WATER and you’re just standing there like “🧍what the fuck-”

A/N: Hi its me again! I hope you enjoyed these hcs! Feel free to critique me as always! 😽

[gaysindistress]

This is definitely not canon at all but yall are gonna let me have this😭

disclaimer: credits to original creator/poster of image/gif. found on google/Pinterest

Astarion x gn!reader

masterlist

So Star Boy, our sweet Astarion, was a magistrate and grew up wealthy, if not nobility in some way. Based on how sarcastic and cunning he can be in the game, I’d bet my left big toe that he used a little shit when he was younger. I’m talking switching the side of the road he’s walking on if he saw a beggar and turning his nose up if they talked to him. We also know that this is somewhat true given how he ended up becoming a vampire. I’m imagining him being very similar to Cressida from Bridgerton; just someone who is miserable and craves feeling important/valued. He needs to make others feel small because he felt worthless growing up and doesn’t know how to cope with the weight of his family’s expectations.

Which leads to me my impossible canon; what if he had a betrothed before he was turned?

What if he was awful to them because he didn’t know how to be kind?

I don’t think he has the ability to be truly awful but I do think he would ignore them, keep a distance, and probably be very short with the poor soul. He’d be dismissive and constantly give them looks because he’s just so angry to be engaged to them. It’s not that they’ve done anything; it’s the fact that he’s being forced to marry someone he didn’t pick himself. Once more his family has taken away his freedom and has forced him to play the part of a noble son.

This betrothal has been in the works for years, maybe even since birth but they haven’t been allowed interact until recently. Sure he’s known that it was some second born of a distant family ally and he’s seen a handful of paintings but that’s all. He’s never spoken to them or truly ever seen them.

It feels like the sky is crumbling around him when he does finally meet his betrothed. Sun breaks through the stained glass windows of the church as astarion stares at the mocking portraits around him. They seem to mock his situation with their out stretched arms that promise freedom and salvation. His boots make sharp and impatient noises as he taps his foot out of frustration. His parents, ever the stunning and elegant figures that they are, whisper as they critique every aspect of their son. Just when he’s about to huff and demand that they leave, the doors swing open and a small crowd of people waltz in. A man and a woman who foil Astarion’s parents stride up to them, murmuring half hearted apologies and excuses. Behind them trails a few servants and the other half of this unwilling couple.

Astarion rolls his eyes at the shy demeanor of his betrothed, cursing any god listening for this entire thing. His mom snaps her fingers and beckons him to her side to make the official introduction.

“Astarion darling, this is your betrothed,” she tells him as the servants fall away and reveal the single most beautiful creature that Astarion has ever laid eyes upon.

“Oh what a pretty little thing,” his father says before Astarion can speak and adds, “it’s shame they’re rather dull minded.”

The look that flashes across his betrothed’s face is one of immense disgust but it’s schooled into one of cool collection. They settle their warm eyes on Astarion and give him a gentile smile as they murmur their greeting.

“What a pretty little thing indeed.” Astarion finds himself saying without realizing it.

When this small spark of admiration bursts into distain is yet to be revealed but rather quickly it does and even the mention of his upcoming wedding makes him ill. Astarion avoids it at all costs and morphs into a bitter husk of himself as it draws closer.

That is until he’s turned.

A part of him is grateful that he’s dead to the world but there’s also a part that feels guilty. The sweet smile didn’t deserve his cruel and cold behavior but then again he didn’t deserve to lose his freedom like that.

Over the years, I’d think he would forget about that part of his life or rather he would lock that memory away. It’s useless to dwell on a ‘what if’ like that when Caz-cunt is alive.

So his pretty little betrothed is scrubbed from his mind and whatever he felt for them is forgotten as well.

Fast forward to when he’s adventuring with Tav. They’ve started what it appears to be a budding relationship (more like a few artfully crafted seductions but that’s not the point). Astartion finds himself falling for Tav and caring for them in a way he never thought possible. There’s a sting in his chest whenever he looks at them but it feels deeper, older than their relationship. It nags at him to remember but to remember what? It feels like it’s always on the tip of his tongue, just out of reach.

His fingers grasp at the tracers of a memory so forbidden that he doesn’t think he could even touch it. At night after hunting, Astarion finds himself staring up at the moon, trying to pick apart his own mind to figure it all out. By morning he’s exhausted and starving again.

During one of his many fruitless nights, he drifts to sleep and wakes up to someone pressing a dagger to his throat.

“Where is your camp?” The shadowy figure demands in a low voice as they gently press the blade against his neck.

“I don’t have one,” he replies, confused by his own quickness to protect his unfortunate companions.

“Lies, where is it?” The blade kisses and lavishes his neck as a prick of blood beads out.

“If you want to keep that hand, I suggest you get off of him and back way,” Tav’s authoritative voice calls out. Astarion can’t see much around the mass that looms over him but he can see that every one of his companions is there with weapons drawn.

The figure makes a disgruntled noise before quickly getting up and backing away with raised hands. They give some bullshit excuse that no one truly believes but Tav is more focused on Astarion to further question them.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” the figure lets slip and earns the full attention of everyone, Tav especially. They position themselves between their lover and this thief, leveling them with a harsh look of judgment.

“Who are you?” Tav demands.

The figure chuckles to themselves as they push their hood off to reveal themselves. A collective shock rings through the group when they finally see the person that got the under hand on Astarion.

“Who I am is unimportant. Why I am here is the question you should be asking.”

Tav shifts from foot to foot, ready to attack as they pose the ‘correct’ question.

The newcomer’s face breaks in an eerily familiar smile as they inform the group that Raphael sent them. They survey the band of ragtag adventurers before them, their eyes quickly scanning over each person but settle on one pale elf.

Chaos seems to erupt in the form of hushed conversations and sharp words but it all falls on deaf ears for Astarion.

All he sees is that perfect facade of a smile and warm eyes that he’s been searching for the 200 years.

“What a pretty little thing you are,” his formerly betrothed murmurs to him and him alone.

[candywife333]

My Little Saesang (Part 1)

chubby reader x idol jungkook

Summary: Y/N had been a super fan for a while. Some would say bordering on saesang or creep level. She didn't think she was one, till she experienced an incident that made her stop being a fan. She had never thought that Jungkook or any of BTS ever noticed her, as she was part of the masses of obsessive fans. But they had. Especially, one doe eyed idol in particular. He never thought he would miss his fan, or shall we say saesang. Yet, he couldn't help but notice her absence. And he didn't know when her presence started to matter to him so much.

Disclaimer: The Jungkook represented in this fic does not reflect the true actions or thoughts of the real life Jungkook. Please treat this fic as exactly what it is, fiction

Triggers: Critique of fandom culture and kpop as a whole, identity crisis, eventual smut

Note: Not proofread. Slated to be approximately 4 parts or less.

"Y/N, what the hell are you still doing in that cafe? Didn't we come over here to spy on Jungkook at his house before he heads off to M-CountDown for his performance? I don't remember scheduling a pit-stop for you to have a second lunch", Kim-Hee glared down at me through her thick framed black glasses that honestly sort of made her look like a sexy principal. Anger at being diverted from her goal of catching the tan pop-star in his sweaty excellence seemed to cloud her vision.

I retorted back with a snort, "You know me very well at this point, after being my fellow saesang comrade in arms for close to 2 years girl. I am digesting my food baby as we speak and will soon be ready for delivery in that nasty garbage ass smelling toilet. I have a date with the shits, so to speak. Don't you see that my jeans are popped open and the zip down ready to go. I don't got the energy to chase this man today. Our stunt at New York was bad enough, don't you think"? Shaking my head at her idiocy even after knowing me for so long, I exclaimed, "Feel free to chase him in time for his ending fairy if you feel like it though. I am just not feeling it today".

Kim Hee, my bestie, stared at me with squinted eyes, black tiny eyes glittering in the harsh sun, "Girl, you were the one who had this all scheduled out a month back? How could you not bloody commit at the crucial time!!!! Our fucking junior fans are counting on your stupid ass". I waved my right at her in dismissal, ramen sauce covering my lips like a new Fenty lipstick that I just could not afford right now with my measly ass job as janitor at KBS.

I snarled back in irritation, "Tell those kids to go and study in college, that's more important than following his dumb ass anyways. He won't remember them for their troubles. At max, he will remember a few fans from their initial debut days , get married to a rich ass plasticky actress, have beautiful spoiled kids, and die a rich philanthropist. Saesangs don't get paid if you catch my point. Honestly, if it paid as a job, I would consider it. But I think I may have to retire". I patted my distended stomach in contentment, satisfied with the first proper meal I had in 3 days, stalking JK with my team all over New York and then catching a flight to Korea for his album showcase.

My bestie stared at me now in shock, with wide eyes, hands waving in the air, clearly confused at my statements, "Didn't you just say a week ago that this was all worth it? That supporting our faves, especially BTS, and the lord and savior himself , Jungkook, was a noble passion to pursue? Why have you suddenly done a 180 on us and him like this"? I flinched visibly at her reminder of what I used to be and who I used to be. The person she described felt foreign to me now. Ever since I opened my eyes and saw what fans, especially super fans like us, who didn't have a life outside of BTS suffered, I was a reformed woman. A reformed woman who had decided as of now to save all my money for some botox and a dental appointment, some clothes for mom and dad, and a hot meal for my younger sister. I was going to go from being a crysallis to a butterfly. In essence, I was going to woman the fuck up. That's what the fuck I was about to do with my life.

With this aim in mind, I slammed my fist against the plastic table, startling Kim Hee. "Bestie, you never got close enough to JK to see how much he hated it, okay? He hated us in those moments that we invaded his privacy. Remember that one time I snuck up on the set of them filming "Black Swan" to give him a godiva chocolate my mom had brought back from Sweden?" Kim Hee nodded in assent, clearly knowing how much of big deal it was for me to part with food of any kind, for any reason, for anyone (Even my own family). I loved luxury chocolate and food in general. Nobody could rip it out of my hands , as evidenced by Kim Hee and all our friends in middle school when I slapped a guy stupid and hit him in the nuts for taking a ferrero rocher out of my hands---the motherfucker.

I continued ,"Well I gave it to his hands while he was waiting outside at the entrance of the set. Even normies like me are allowed on that area, it was not a restricted filming area. I just left the chocolate next to where he was sitting, with a red bow (his name engraved on it) wrapped around it. He legit stared at me in confusion, like he had not seen me for the past 9 years, sneered at me, disdain in his beady black eyes and threw the chocolate in the dustbin like it was as figment of his imagination". Kim Hee stared at me in dismay, clearly knowing that what I considered the foremost cardinal sin in life was throwing away food, particularly expensive food.

I wrung my hands in the air, holding in my tears, "Bestie, it was white chocolate, do you understand? It was limited christmas edition. I could never afford that chocolate in my dreams , if not for one of mom's colleagues gifting it to her. Chili ,(my sister) was yapping about it for days, salivating, thinking she could bite into it. And I sacrificed it to an undeserving multi millionaire". I sat back down on the bench, numbly, tears streaming down my face. I was so done with him and the entire group at this point. I understand that what we do, Saesangs, stalkers, whatever they like to call us, is not correct. We should not be so invasive. But I always told the kids who followed in my footsteps that we could support them, but just not to the point that we impinged on their personal lives. I had done some fucked up things as a newbie army, but two years into their debut, I understood that limits were required.

The most I had ever done since then, was to gift the members things as a fan. Whatever I could afford. Whether that was their favorite convenience store snack left by us on the set of one of their music video shoots. Or a pack of gum or their favorite desserts when we attended fan meets. I and the girls who followed me on these adventures, as I used to call them, never snuck into HYBE. We were of the more benign variety, not on par with the crazies who took the same flight as them (not that I could afford that), or collected saliva, sweat, and urine samples. For goodness sakes, we didn't even run after their vehicles, we just waved politely and jumped up and down like rabid dogs that had treats waved in their faces.

The moment I was compelled to stop following my fave, or I guess my former bias as of now, was simply when he casually looked at the chocolate I had left next to him as though it were poison, and tossed it in the trash without looking back. That was when I knew, I was worthless in his eyes, along with the rest of the fans who tried so hard.

We shelled out money saved up from little jobs and pocket money accumulated for months together, to buy expensive albums, merchandise, and anything else they put out. We forgo the little luxuries like nicer shoes and warmer coats in winter to buy tickets for outdoor showcases and shiver in the cold wind to just catch a glimpse of one of their half smiles. We stream their music that speaks of love that we do not comprehend, love whose face is so unfamiliar in our youth that we would pass it by as though it were a stranger. When we don't have anyone in our lives to hug us and hold us and kiss us, to wipe our tears and pat us on the back when we are down and to tell us that everything will be alright, we stare at them in the tabloids extrapolating who they could be in love with, fantasizing about a love that could never be ours. We live our lives, living for them, living around them as though we are satellites caught int he orbit of a bigger planet, and now, it does not make sense to me anymore.

It may just be a chocolate, stupid worthless and insignificant to him. It may be cheap, a show of cheap love that he wishes to spit on. But it wasn't cheap to me. My love wasn't cheap. Food isn't cheap, especially food bestowed with love. And I was done giving my love away for free, as though it meant nothing. As though it were a cheap cigarette to be smoked and discarded, ground under the foot of someone who had finished using it for a fleeting high. Cheap and dispensable and convenient, that's what we were, what I had become.

I cringed internally as my gaze redirected towards Kim Hee. I croaked out in determination while chewing on the remnants of soggy ramyun, "We are done babe. I am through with this horrible, parasitic relationship. I am going to figure out how to make myself rich or get rich through marriage. I am done being stupid, falling over myself for a guy or a group of guys who don't see or appreciate me. They get rich on my desperation, and I don't wish to give them that power anymore".

[venussaidso]

Rahu Dominant Themes — 𝐍𝐚𝐤𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐫𝐚 𝐎𝐛𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 (part 1 of) 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟕

warning ⚠️: movie spoilers

Lord Rudra is an angry manifestation of Shiva who is the god that destroys the universe in order to re-create it. Rudra is the version which emphasizes the destruction of illusions, imperfections, diseases etc. before change can take place. Rudra means "one who eradicates problems from their roots", which rules Ardra, where we see the shadow planet Rahu being at it's potent height. Rahu is always dissatisfied and filled with illusions. With Rudra here, we see the strong conviction to break all things illusory, that are a stain or disease. Ardra, being Gemini and Rahu together, chooses to face the cold, harsh truth by deconstructing it (Mercury). There comes an intense anger and urge to destroy the root of all problems.

The best piece of media by far to embody the potency of Ardra, especially Rudra, is MR. ROBOT.

Ardra is quite contradictory, as it aims to expose truth by ruthlessly shining light on it ("control is an illusion") and therefore breaking the illusion, despite literally being ruled by the most illusory planet, Rahu. Rami Malek is an Ardra Ascendent and in the series Mr. Robot, he plays a cybersecurity engineer who uses his rare intelligence (Gemini/Mercury) to take down an evil conglomerate that controls the world & gets away with terrible world crimes that are swept under the rug. The Ardra character is already established as not a truth seeker, but someone who is already aware of everything and has been long disillusioned. The other important main characters also seem to be played by Rudra influenced actors which I found so incredible. These key characters show different dysfunctional aspects of society, almost critiquing them. Though Rudra is more potent through Ardra, Rudra has incarnated in different forms. Aja Ekapanda, Ahir Bhudhanya - Purva Bhadrapada, Uttara Bhadrapada. And Goddess Kali has associations with Rudra, and it rules the nakshatra Mula - which forms the axis with Ardra (being Sagittarius-Gemini). All the Rudra nakshatras are scattered across the main cast of Mr. Robot.

Another similar piece of media that is linked with Ardra and anarchist/political themes that expose heavy truths of society and elite powers of the world is the film V FOR VENDETTA, which leans more into anti-fascism. Starring an Ardra native.

Ardra faces the reality of things that is usually harsh and too overwhelming for others to bare, the kind of truth that is often not thought of. The series The Boys shows what would realistically happen if superheroes were a thing — none of that Marvel sugarcoating shit. Just like Rami Malek's character in Mr. Robot, the character Billy Butcher played by Karl Urban is already established as one who knows the harsh reality of superheroes (being monsters and corporate puppets) and is portrayed as an angry, disgruntled, dissatisfied person. And of course there is Rahu/Ardra influence.

Ardra is not always about dethroning corrupt powers. It can simply manifest into meaningless chaos, purposeless anarchy as seen in Heath Ledger's Joker who only makes chaos to prove the hypocrisy in people and society. This critical nature is always within Ardra, no matter how chaotic and senseless it manifests.

Yes he's an Ardra Moon.

It's always interesting how nakshatras with the same planetary rulership can share the same themes, despite the differences in their ruling deities. The film, Joker (2019), criticizes how society treats its ostracized members. And the character Arthur Fleck, being played by Swati Sun Joaquin Phoenix, unintentionally (and unknowingly) drives pure anarchy in the streets. Becoming the face of a movement spawned around him, called 'Jokerism'. And these masks, just like in MR. ROBOT (fsociety), V For VENDETTA, make the symbol of the movement.

I also find it interesting that Zoro is a masked vigilante who fights against the injustice and victimization of the lower class and indigenous people. Shatabhisha can act as a saviour in this case, more than what is seen from Ardra and Swati.

The character Hobie Brown being voiced by Shatabhisha Sun Daniel Kaluuya in the new Spiderverse film. Interesting enough, Shatabhisha being Aquarius can also have chaotic, rebellious and even anarchist tendencies. Aquarius emphasizes individualism, roots for the underdog and can absolutely despise authority – especially the corrupt kind (but mostly it's fuck all authority).

The nakshatra also being co-ruled by Rahu, they can see through illusions and have a simple yet realistic approach to things (Saturn). There is defiance there in Shatabhisha, but rarely ever as erratic or angry as Ardra. In fact, Shatabhisha is more on what's morally right and wrong compared to Ardra where a dualistic nature is conveyed. Shatabhisha has a tougher framework, can be very virtuous.

Shatabhisha is ruled by the deity Lord Varuna who is the personification of divine authority and moral law. The theme of authority can manifest in several ways for Shatabhisha. Rebellion against authority can go to the extreme ends of violence and unlawfulness. Or it can go into activism. Critiquing the many issues in the world that are glaringly wrong and unfair (what the modern internet now calls 'wokeism'). Themes of rebellion or exposure in a political and societal context can be linked with Swati. This can somewhat be seen in the following medias:

𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗧𝗜𝗡𝗨𝗘𝗗 𝗜𝗡 𝗣𝗔𝗥𝗧 𝗧𝗪𝗢:

[hwaightme]

Panacea

OUT NOW: Panacea

song used in teaser: de selby (part 1) by hozier

🌊pairing: poet!seonghwa x doctor!gn!reader 🌊genre: fluff, slice of life, slow burn, healing, strangers to lovers, comfort 🌊summary: what do a poet who lost his inspiration and a cosmetic surgeon who lost their empathy have in common? when you make an escape from the city to a memory-filled cottage on the edge of the world, you meet park seonghwa, a poet who, after growing fatigued of shallow critique and unwanted attention, is on a search for true beauty. you, a surgeon who cannot bear to hear nor assess another patient , abhor its twisted definitions. as the seasons change, storms abate and your paths entangle, you discover a new, unparalleled kind of beauty. 🌊wordcount: estimated around 30k 🌊warnings/tags: semi-edited, ??? attempts at sijo (forgive me), discussion of beauty standards, mention of surgery/clinics, weather imagery, dreams/nightmares, discussion of life and death (jokes relating to death), talk of side character death, urban/rural comparisons, isolation, burnout, philosophy, judgement of media, seaside, cliffs, dialogue + inner thoughts, perspective switching, falling in love, loving another's mind, talk of what is 'real' beauty, food, eating, cooking, implied anxiety, implied impulsive thoughts, sneak into home 🌊author's note: happy birthday, seonghwa. thank you for all you inspire me to do, and for teaching me how to find the sun even in a rainstorm. sincere and diligent, you are the spring, the renaissance, the glimmering light. wishing for you and for atiny alike to have a cherished panacea and a love brighter than the stars.

teaser (1.3k):

...Mid-spin, just as you were finished with making the filling and were in the process of lining a baking tin with some of the pastry, the front door creaked open, revealing the figure that you had spotted outside of your window, walking alongside the beginnings of what would be a cliff’s edge. You stood still, holding the pie tin, feeling the grooves of its edges, balancing the dough that was still wrapped in clingfilm right in the middle, as though if you were to not move this man would not see you. Heart quickening to a nauseating pace, the intense scrutiny that you were receiving made you want to collapse behind the counter. Before this moment, you had convinced yourself that you had fully adopted a devil may care attitude, and that you were ready for whoever you would encounter, having prepared the humble abode for a you-style reception and to assert who truly was deserving of ownership of this property. But something about this enigmatic persona who, just like you, remained unmoving, echoed the seastorms. A roaring of the waves was contained in his orbs, so dark due to the light being behind the man’s back that you could barely detect the transition from pupil to iris. A nose worthy of being depicted in renaissance paintings, in fact, if you had to pinpoint one way to describe the stranger, is that he reminded you of subjects that graced the walls of art galleries, selected by masters to be immortalised in the artists’ name. Nameless, much like he was to you in this present moment. His lips, ever so slightly parted as if he had been on the verge of saying something to you, only for the aim to fall short of execution, voice drowning in doubt or disgust. The corners of the man’s mouth were gently downturned - not unpleasantly so, but rather giving him an aura of intimidation that intrigued you. Shadows on his face suggested to you that he was unshaven, though, you had to admit that it was not too bad of a look. In fact, an interesting edge of ruggedness that balanced with his longer locks gave the man a new form of allure, and in turn, forced you to keep your eyes on him despite feeling inklings of terror. The scene reminded you of a faceoff between two territorial wolves - whose domain was this? Only time and a match of resolve would tell.

He was the first to break eye contact, sighing and moving to take off his shoes and trench coat. You remained still - a hostile animal that was expecting aggression at any moment. The man was silent, unphased by your ‘out of the blue’ appearance at least outwardly, and you were not certain whether his lack of reaction was something to be taken with gratitude or suspicion. As you inspected his motions, how he stretched out his arm to hang the trench coat on the rack that was hammered to the wall, with the right nail ever so slightly lower than the left, how he ran a hand through his hair, casting shadows over what hinted at months of fatigue. Not quite pallid, but definitely tired skin, holding times of discomfort, sleeplessness. Dark circles under those deep, pensive orbs, cheeks that were somewhere between sunken and youthful. The man stood before you in a white shirt, the colour a last cry to some form of purity and hope. You could guess why he was at the cottage, since it was not too challenging to see your own reflection in the corners of his soul, much like you could sense that he was reading you. He reminded you of an angel who was tired of praying, barely capable of carrying his body. Pressed down by the story that had been written for him, he was likely here for an escape, to drown out the sounds of whatever he was running from. Perhaps you should be friendly, and welcome this lost soul. After all, he could be unaware of where he is nor of what unspoken rules exist around here. The least you could do is make him feel at home-

“You made a mess,” and just like that, all desire to be amiable flew out of the window and into the sea. His curt comment was like a burning cold scalpel, words too familiar to be neutral and well-received. 

Before you could respond, the man was well on his way to the bathroom, and judging by the slam of the door, he was not very pleased to see the rearrangements you had made. No comments followed, however, and instead, the pause was filled by the sound of running water, followed by a muffled mumbling when following a couple of rattles, the pressure inevitably dropped and there was barely a trickle. You shook your head, amused by how this man had been living in this property without the basic knowhow. Clearly, he was one of the many cityfolk who wanted to try his luck while on holiday. Exotic stay to talk about with his glamorous friends, you bet. For him to explain how ‘the bucolic was not even as appealing as literature made it out to be’. Standard. Faceless. You would forget him in no time, especially since he would probably leave before it got less fun and more mundane to stay out in the wilderness. That pretty face should not know harshness. With a huff, you set the tin down onto the counter and set the oven to preheat. With swift, irritated movements, you took to lining the metal with the dough, and in no time shifted to ladling the filling inside, halting to watch the last of the fruity cinnamon remnants dribble from the bowl down to join the rest of the sweet and sour promise.

The man returned when you were in the process of lacing strings of dough together to structure a coherent design. With an embarrassing surgical precision, you focused on the patterns - culinary sutures, almost horrified by the technique that you could not prevent from channelling itself through your body, to your very fingertips especially now that there was an audience. If he wanted to give you a stern talking to, it had quickly dissipated and mid-stride, the stranger was observing you as though you were carrying out a sacred ritual. The spotlight was on you as you demonstrated how to put the flesh back together. Piecing the skin bit by bit so as to ensure minimal scarring, careful now, people come to you to make themselves feel beautiful after all. String by string, the pie was looking more like itself, a recipe book photograph, something worthy of immortalising as the model step before baking. A beeping confirmed that the patient was relaxed, steady, with a perfect heart rate - good, all the readings were steady, now all you needed was to make the final - you felt for the tray finding empty space. Did someone misplace the tools? Panic shot into your nervous system and with a jolt you pushed yourself away from the table, only to find yourself gazing, startled, at someone who you had begun to assume was an intern. The guest, or cohabitant? An eyebrow raised, the ghost of a smirk on his lips as he took in your state. You clicked your tongue, finally putting two and two together and grabbing the timer behind you, purposefully taking your time so that you would not have to look at your newfound personification of madness for longer than necessary. So much for an introduction; the figure who was still a mystery to you slinked back into the shadows, with only the click of the office door serving as a confirmation that he was real. You rubbed your temples, the distant thrumming of a headache resembling a thunder that crawled over the horizon. Demonstratively, you sprinkled some flour onto a previously clean spot on the wooden countertop, only to automatically reach for the towel and drop the action again. No, it was time to bake. You needed to bake. You needed to make this place feel like home for the next couple of months, even if this peculiar character was going to be sharing it...

🌊 perma-taglist: @acciocriativity @justhere4kpop @starrysvn @byuntrash101 @shakalakaboomboo @uwuheeseungie @frankenstein852 @charreddonuts @miriamxsworld @innsomniacshinestar @foxinnie8 @preciouswoozi @wooyoungjpg @nebulousbookshelf @wowie-hockey @hongjoongs-patience @jaehunnyy @maddkitt @ren-junwrld @pyeonghongrie-main @marsstarxhwa @pocketjoong-reads @yeooclock @yeonjunnie @asjkdk @lucky-cat-cafe @northerngalxy @my-loves-my-life @http-gyu

interested? send me an ask to be added to the perma-taglist or to a taglist for Panacea <3

[devils-little-sista]

But like why tho. Why. Cause we didn’t need the first one. Most of us didn’t want the first one. Why is there going to be a second just as unwanted and unneeded one. Like why. Just. Why.

[rosinastrology]

Kylie Jenner - Chart Analysis

My observations and interpretation of her chart:

Sun in Leo, Moon in Scorpio, Capricorn Rising

Leo Sun: She is a star. In her own way. 

Capricorn Rising: Gives her a(n) entrepreneurial and serious look.

Venus in 8th house: Love could feel like it’s hard to find. She may find foreigners appealing for dating. Virgo Venus can indicate someone who is picky with who she decides to date or even fall in love with. She values health and Mercury feels at home in Virgo. Her mind is well grounded, however, having Venus conjunct Mercury could mean a bit of difficulty in love because the person with this placement can become too analytical or focus too much on the smallest details (or flaws) in the relationship. Mercury reigns communication, so she can have a very controlled way of speaking with the sign it is in.

I think she struggles with her emotions and how she handles negative ones.

Moon square Uranus, Jupiter, and the Sun: I don’t think she feels safe around men and that has to do with her relationship with her father.

Sun square Moon: Dad and mom are not together. 

Venus trine Saturn: Confident in herself in spite of the critiques and bullying she’s suffered in the past. 

Taurus cusp in her 5th house indicates a lavish lifestyle and Venus in the 8th house (pretty close to the 9th house of travel and education). Lots of traveling to beautiful places.

She might feel insecure about expressing her emotions, especially in public. 

She’s too focused on sounding perfect with her words, just like a Virgo does, choosing carefully what to say when she’s getting interviewed or questioned.

Such an entrepreneur. In her early environment, I think Kylie was restricted from having fun (in a way) and instead probably told to look great. Work her body out or change something about it. I only think this because she’s got an Aries Saturn and the cusp of her 4th house/IC is in Aries. Aries is still the 1st house and rules the body and self. And I feel like fame has truly shaped (quite literally) her body and the idea/view of herself (Neptune square Saturn). 

Lots of red aspects to her personal placements, especially her Moon. Scorpio Moon can indicate having a powerful mom, in terms of social circles and knowing the right people/connections. Moon square Jupiter can mean not seeing her worth because of her origins and where she comes from. She comes from a rich family, so her achievements may feel like she didn’t really earn them. There is a part of her that probably feels that way. 

Not focusing on talking about the degrees in the charts, but I found pointing out that her Midheaven is at the 29th degree (anaretic degree) can mean she has reached a level of mastery at what people wanted from her and in her career. She’s famous, rich, popular, and is leaving a legacy for millions and millions of women who are into beauty and makeup for generations to come. She’s mastered her career and made something long-lasting of it, which is her beauty business brand, Kylie Cosmetics. 

The early home environment was or perhaps still is somewhat chaotic. And the chaos is exposed in the public. 

The ruler of her Aries IC cusp is at the opposite end, in Libra. Libra Mars: There is a certain balance in her career that is lacking in the home. She truly needs someone who can ground her into the home and what she needs, for instance, someone with Taurus placements would be really good for her. 

North Node in the 8th house: Leaving a legacy. Securing properties and real estate owned by her. 

Mercury-Venus conjunct: Using her mind and beauty to build money.

Neptune in 1st house: Iconic, icon… fame through business venues.

She needs to be careful of making deals with the wrong people because it could affect her business. She’s a person who works really hard for what she wants in a detailed-oriented manner. I think she feels more confident and in her power when she’s around people with a progressive way of thinking and who keep up with the modern trends. Modern and newest. 

She must feel lonely when it comes to romantic and intimate relationships because she tends to be of service in her relationships. I feel like the men she’s been with take advantage of that. One of the reasons I believe Virgos should have higher standards. Many of them have really high standards that can take them to a lonely place for a very long time until they realize they deserve to be served as well in the same way they make themselves available to others.

There may be times when she puts her mind before the heart. What she should do for her image instead of what makes her happy. There is a mild level of difficulty with this placement (Venus conjunct Mercury). There are two nice aspects to her Venus if we don’t take into account the Mercury-Venus conjunction. First, she has Saturn trine Venus, which can indicate someone who was raised with a nice value system or developed her own value system from a place of maturity. Second, Neptune trines Venus, which gives Kylie this soft and sort of fantasy-like beauty.

Moon conjunct Pluto: Controlling mother… Moon in Scorpio is not easy. The ruler of her Moon’s sign is in the 10th house and 11th house, so a well-known mother. Kylie has a lot of power when it comes to networking and knowing who to work with in the media. 

Another thing to point out Libra is the aesthetics and glamour. Mars is a planet of action and stamina. Mars is also considered the physical body, so the physical aesthetics have made her truly famous. Nonetheless, if it helps boost her career, who cares right? But the thing is that these physical aesthetics can be seen as merely superficial and people may not see her as for who she is but as a prototype that was modified to bolster her image and career.

And I think she knows her body is not who she is, but she needs to maintain her family’s legacy.

Moon in Scorpio: Absent mother in the sense that mom might not have been there to nurture Kylie the way she needed. Mom might be a busy one.

Moon square Uranus: Her emotional processes in the house of reputation and the planet of chaos/innovation in the house of the self can indicate someone’s life and career bared naked in full exposure to the public affecting one’s image and progress. I have a feeling that she doesn’t feel like her real self in her own body. 

Saturn in the 3rd house is difficult. I personally have this placement in a different sign, of course. Saturn here can indicate problems with peers and schooling, or trouble learning a subject or in general. Problems with speech, for example, not being able to say a word or letter in the proper manner. 

Mars conjunct the Midheaven: Someone who uses their ambition to push their career forward. 

Aries IC: Probably very competitive in the early household. She may have been bullied in school or even in the home. However, there’s a grounding level of maturity that comes with age as she realizes that she’s not what she was told or named.

Balancing her assets, having control of her image and preserving her legacy is what she should focus on.

@rosinastrology

Hope you enjoy this one!! xx

[herejusttosufferalong]

Hello, SEX anon again.

Been a while. Gonna try this sober. God bless my soul.

Soooooo.... what's been happening? Not much, you say? Everything's going swimmingly? Not much to report. Like a big pizza pie? That's amore, you say? Hah cringe, death. OH GOOD! I had this weird feeling like things were getting messy? Like impending doom. Like walls crashing in on me. Suffocating me. DROWNING IN A SEA OF MY OWN GODDAMN TEARS. Killing me softly with his song. No, all good, yes? We good? We fine? Oh, for the love of Lukola, what a relief.

It would be incredibly embarrassing if I lost myself... became too dramatic, too obsessive, too unhinged. Getting messy, talking about 'it was all PR, god damn it'. Sobbing uncontrollably into my 'Polin 4eva' t-shirt. Can you imagine? NO, ffs. You ain't getting that from me. I'm stability personified. Try to shake me, make me shook... uhm, nah... not happening. I'm a goddamn beacon in the darkness. Hard af. And you are too, Suffer. I like you. You are a nice boulder. That sweet spot of self-aware delulu that fills me up, just right.

I dunno, anyone else got a sadistic smile plastered on their face, or that just me? I never knew part 3 (or is it 4? 5? fked if I know) could be so fkn good. It has everything. Sun, sea, self-annihilation. Everything. Some critiques though. Just one or two. Just... a few notes. Look, like everyone else I'm a sucker for the mirroring of themes, but I dunno, it's getting a little repetitive, no? Seen one orgy, seen them all, right? And the new cast? Uhm, like, I see that they're trying... I really can. But Shonda? Jess? Tom? You might want to have a word to casting. I dunno, like. What are they going for? Friend, foe, fkbudy? It's really hard to tell. It's giving... mummy paid for my acting classes and slept with the producer. Sorry that was unfair... mummy didn't pay for acting classes coz you self-taught, baby. You a star, look at you, friggin' twinkling. Big smile, baby... twirl... fkn death. On an unrelated note, anyone got some Tums? Nicotine? Heroin? Big goddamn sledge hammer with my name on it? No... ok. Shame.

But you know what, that main character, w/e his name is, fk he's good. Portraying emotionally disconnected, hanging by a thread, cognitive dissonance like a fkn pro. I'm impressed. Oh wait, that's Ol' Col', you say? Mr Fingerton? Really? Oh yeah, I shoulda known. Shoulders so broad them eclipse the sun. Thighs so thic them part the seas. How much you bench, bro? Answer: Me. You: What? Me: Yes. Fk, I remember him. But hasn't he played this sequence before? I thought we resolved these demons? No, oh, something about a siren song? Something about Pinocchio? Real bohy, invisible strings, suede clogs? Speaking of, where his Queen? She know he's on vay-cay teaching swim school on screen? She gonna be there too? Dressed for the occasion, tatas on show? Run sequence? Glistening, heaving... Sorry, uhm, where was I? Oh yeah... how come when I close my eyes all I see is his finger in her mouth? Oral fixation by proxy, isn't it? Mhmm. Nice.

Eh... you know what, I changed my mind. This part is all A-grade material. I can't tell where fiction starts and reality ends, and you know what, that's the place I like to inhabit. Coz you tell me tomorrow that Lady Tata and Ol' Col' been together 4 years, expecting their 5th child, maybe first grandchild? I'll drink it, I'll snort it, I'll bathe in it. And you know what, I just know you would too... slutty smirk.

The main character needs to come on home

💜🥃

[hangryyell]

I have a fanfic in the works rn, but I wanna do a short for you guys before I post the other. Critique is welcome! Please and thank you! Enjoy!

Astarion x Zekaria

TRIGGER WARNINGS: CnC

Kinks: Hair/Horn/tail pulling, blood drinking, spanking, vocal

The sun rose and it felt like i didn’t get enough sleep. Groaning as I sit up, eyes still closed as the giant star in the sky all but blinded me still. I rub my face and yawn, stretching, bones popping.

“My, someone is a sleepy pup.” Came from Gale as he sauntered over. I turn my head to where I heard him, eyes still closed tightly.

“I am so tired.” I whine. The wizard chuckles.

“Some of us are going out to get supplies and see if we can pick up any leads on this Halsin guy. You’re more than welcome to stay and rest. It shouldn’t be too daunting for us.” He spoke.

Humming I nodded, about to curl back into my bed roll when Astarion spoke up. “You can sleep in my tent if you want the sun out of your way.” I nodded at that, standing, Gale reached out and took hold of my arm to help me stand.

I cracked my eyes open and made a face at how bright the sun was today of all days! I stumble over to Astarion’s tent and crawled in, sighing softly at how nice and dark and cool it was in there. My tail wagged lightly, the smell of him was intoxicating. A nice perfume but also with an added earthiness to it.

“Hmm.” I snuggle into his pillows breathing him in, relaxing into his furs. I am dozing off when I feel the sun peak through the flap at the opening of his tent. Then feel a presence over me, knees brushing my putter thighs as someone straddles the backs of my thighs.

“Come on, I want to sleep.” I whine, not moving from my spot or trying to get them out.

I feel cool hands massage up the backs of my thighs to cup my ass. My tail stiffens and I go to turn my head, but they move fast, grabbing my opposite horn and turning my head away from them. Their fingers tangle in my hair and their other cold hand wraps my tail around to tug.

I groan at the slight pain, thighs squeezing together. They push my head down into the pillow, cool lips press to my ear.

“Just relax and enjoy me taking my pleasure from you.” Came Astarion’s silky smooth voice to glide over my body and ghost along my ear. I bite my bottom lip and try to struggle a little bit, to make it worth both our time.

“I’m not going to give in to you so easily.” I counter. A soft chuckle comes from him as he yanks on my tail once more, a moan coming from me.

“There are still some of our friends here, best keep quiet.” He threatens, shoving my head into his pillow. “Know your place, I don’t want to hear a peep out of you.” The vampyr snaps.

Astarion keeps my tail wrapped in his hand, pulling it to make me get on my knees. I lean back to feel he was willing and wanting. I press my face into the pillow I held onto for dear life to keep quiet.

“There we go, so good for me love.” He hummed, his free hand gripping my hip so he could rut against my. My trousers already wet with arousal.

It was always the size difference between us that turned me on to no end. How strong he was, how fast he could take over as if my size never bothered him. The snowed haired man finally let go of my tail to pull down my trousers enjoy to expose my slick folds to him.

“All that fight you tried to give me before, look at you.” He sucked his teeth and shook his head. One of his hands coming down with a hard slap over one of my bare cheeks.

“Fuck Astarion, just fuck me already.” I hiss, turning my head to look at him. My purple and green eyes bore into him, glassy with lust and want. “Now.” I snap.

The vampyr gave me a grin, all fangs as he bent and sunk his teeth into the top of my ass cheek. I groan softly, watching him the entire time. He drank from me slowly, keeping my gaze as he spanked me again harder than before.

“Gods, you’re such an insufferable tease.” I whine, putting my face back into the pillow.

“Only cause you make me dear.” He countered, as he licked the puncture holes above my ass.

Astarion pulled his own trousers down, sliding his length between my folds and thighs. “Shit.” He hisses, hands grabbing hold of my hips as he teased me even more. The feel of how wet I was as he pistioned his hips like that, the sound of our skin meeting was so pretty. How he panted, finger nails digging into my skin just right.

He gave me a slow thrust, the head of his cock brushing my clit causing my to squeeze my thighs together, pressing back against him.

“Astarion please.” I beg, feeling my slick start to make its way down my thighs.

He hummed at my plead and pulled out. “Hold yourself open for me.” He demanded, moving so he wasn’t keeping my legs trapped between his.

I reach back taking hold of each globe in my hands and widened my legs so he could see what a mess he’s made me. Astarion licked his lips as he watched, scooting closer to tease my hole with his length this time.

“Look at you.” He groaned softly, spanking me once, twice and finally a third time watching my cunt grip nothing.

“Please.” I beg more desperately this time, the side of my face against the pillow.

“Since you asked so nicely.” He purred. The silver haired man fed me inch by inch of his thick aching cock. I moan into the pillow, squeezing him with everything in me.

“Fuck.” He growls low in his throat as he bottoms out, hips pressed against me. I wiggle against him hearing him hiss has me doing it again.

“God, first the smell of you, the taste of you and now the feel of you. My dear I don’t think I could go back to not having any part of you.” He babbled, pulling out until just the tip of him was left inside me. I panted, pressing my hips back again, following him. I moan as he stretched me again.

“Fuck me, make me cum on that cock Astarion.” I whine, my nails digging into my skin.

The vampyr licks his lips and starts up a brutal pace. I turn my face into the pillow quickly, cursing into the fabric. My hands fall from their position and brace against the floor so I have him as deep as possible.

The sounds from the vampyr babbling praise and dirty words, along side the sound of how wet this man made me. Gods if this could go on forever I wouldn’t give a rats ass about the tadpole living in my head right now.

He pushed my shoulders down into the furs, lifting up onto his feet to squat behind me and pound me from that position. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as he filled me perfectly, feeling every inch of him, every vein.

“Yes, yes.” I moan as he can’t help but meet each thrust. I was so close.

Astarion took a handful of my hair, the grip he had made my scalp tingle as he brought his lips to my ear.

“Touch yourself, I want you to finish with me.” He demanded, nipping my earlobe.

I didn’t need to touch myself, the moment he would bite into me I’d finish immediately. I held on as long a so could. Chanting his name, claws digging into the furs under me.

The rouge groaned, putting his face into my neck and biting me hard. He drank from me and I moaned, squeezing him tightly as I came around him. He slapped a hand over my mouth to keep me as quiet as possible as he continued to use me to chase his end.

He drank and then stilled, filling me with his load. Pulling from my neck he licked the wound closed and kissed them before dropping the hand from my mouth.

I collapsed onto the bedroll underneath me, trying to catch my breath. My eyes closed as I laid there. Astarion slowly pulled out, watching our mix of juices slowly spilling out of me.

“Mmm, look at you.” He said, giving my ass a pat before helping me put my trousers back on. He crawled to lay beside me and stare at my face. I open my eyes and give him a small smile.

“Can I go back to sleep now?” I chuckle. I leaned toward him and placed a kiss to his lips. The vampyr opened his mouth and allowed me to explore his mouth. The taste of myself and him caused me to moan softly before I pulled away. “Get out.” I told him with a smile and half lidded eyes.

Astarion laughed at that and nodded, crawling over me. “I’ll guard your body.” He told me as he left, the sun peaking through at me.

[jacobtheloofah]

ive unexpectedly gotten way back into overwatch 2, heres some observations:

im frankly annoyed to say that the game has really gotten to a good state of balance in terms of the meta. there's very few weak points in the roster, some heroes still suffer from really doing well in certain situations and not very well in others, and i genuinely love a lot of the changes that have been made to heroes. i used to absolutely hate orisa and now i love her, i find myself even playing more symmetra and brigitte and so on. i suppose the biggest critique is that sombra is now extremely fun to play but extremely not fun to play against

the battle pass is annoying but easy to ignore, and now that there isnt the constant chase for lootboxes my god the game is so much more rewarding and healthy. its no longer "i gotta play more to get more gold" its "im gonna play a few rounds and then call it a day" like thank goodness

theres still plenty of chodes in quickplay who treat it way too serious even tho comp is right there for them

"mystery heroes" always seems to have the most positive and fun players

ive gotten way worse at deathmatch which makes me sad

"hero mastery" is a fucking joke unless youre really into speedruns

i dont know what the "missions" mode is and i dont care enough to find out

for me personally i do not miss the lack of PvE, i always hated every PvE event so no skin off my back but it does feel lame that they completely backtracked on that promise for those who did want it

i think we can officially declare the lore to be absolutely pointless beyond letting the team make heroes with unique abilities. like they went "heres a healer with sun powers cuz shes the last warrior from a group that had solar threads augmented into their bodies so they could harness the power of the sun." sure, fuckin whatever, shes fun to play so thats all that matters. we're never gonna get lore for zenyatta at this point so im checked out of that. its like that graph someone made that was like "star wars is aesthetically sci fi but materially fantasy" its the same thing, it works i guess

zarya still has no good skins