#the struggles of loving imogen and laudna and imodna

[hello-eeveev]

Okay okay I’ve seen some takes regarding Orym on twitter (specifically about his relationship to Laudna) that I feel the need to refute but I have a lot of thoughts and also I don’t want to get into fights so hi tumblr! rant below the cut 😊

(tl;dr I think the bell’s hells are doing the best they can in a series of complicated situations, but people are expecting a kind of inter-party conflict to come from it that doesn’t line up with the text and I don’t get it, so I guess I must become Orym’s #1 defender, feat. a defense of the c3e63 decision, Ludinus Da’leth hate, and big big feelings about Keyleth and Vax)

Take: Orym is uncomfortable with Laudna’s weirdness/creepiness, as evidenced by him always bringing it up and trying to hide and obscure her undead presence.

My opinion: Laudna loves the fact that she’s creepy. She revels in it. Orym/Liam pointing it out in narration is part flavor text, part acknowledging an important aspect of Laudna. It’s like how he always makes sure everyone knows that Orym is Small. Not to mention, Marisha brings it up in her narration as much as Liam does.

During Laudna’s resurrection ritual, Orym says, “I don’t know what Bell’s Hells will be without your darkness, Laudna. Or your light.” He values both sides of her!

Regarding Orym’s disguises for Laudna (i.e. dressing her in white in bassuras, adding flowers to her hair to give her more color in hearthdell), again I don’t think this is a sign of Orym’s discomfort with her. Remember, Orym is a bodyguard. His job is to protect others, protect the group. Yes, several members of Bell’s Hells will draw eyes, but notably, Laudna—being undead-ish, with the Unsettling Presence feature and a canonically scary physical appearance—might strike fear into others. And fear makes people more willing to resort to violence than, say, being surprised by the presence of a robot or a faun. It’s not about making her palatable, it’s about keeping all of them safe. It’s bodyguard behavior.

Also, Orym only does this when they are actively avoiding drawing attention to themselves, and as far as I know, Laudna has only had a problem with it once.

Take: Laudna looked to Ashton and Orym for what to do during the scuffle with Bor’Dor, and Orym encouraged her to let Delilah back in, all because he’s hell-bent on revenge and thinks he can use Delilah’s power to get it. He actively disregarded Laudna’s well-being to further his own goals.

My opinion: No, she wasn’t looking to them for what to do. Marisha said it herself: Laudna was barely present. She couldn’t even hear Deni$e suggest keeping Bor’Dor alive; what makes you think she’s going to see a singular nod from Orym 15 feet away? She had already done Hunger of the Shadow, was already cloaked in the “purple-ish glowing hue that hasn’t been seen in a while,” and Matt had mentioned the heartbeat long before Liam ever said anything. Laudna had already let Delilah back in before Orym nodded and before she killed Bor’Dor. It was a horrible situation all around, but Orym did not convince Laudna to let Delilah back in for his own purposes. It is not his fault that Laudna embraced Delilah’s power or that Bor’Dor died. Laudna made her choice, as heartbreaking and conflicting as it may be, so let her live with it.

And for the record, I think they were justified in killing Bor’Dor. He attacked them with a pretty powerful spell (he did Vitriolic Sphere at its baseline 4th level, which is the second highest level spell he had) and nearly killed Prism in the process. Yes, Bor’Dor did a bit of waffling back and forth between “I’m gonna kill you!” and “just let me die,” but him being a pathetic mess is nothing new. He still tried to kill them all. If they let him live, there was no guarantee he wouldn’t try it again.

I don’t know how to impress this upon people who haven’t already gotten it from just watching the show, but the Ruby Vanguard is a bad group. Ludinus Da’leth is a bad person. He may have convinced some members that his goals are noble, but they aren’t. He is misleading people for his own gain, because guess what? The concept of free will exists even with the existence of the gods! People are allowed to worship them or not, and the gods aren’t smiting people down for refusing to worship them (otherwise Keyleth would be long dead, y’all. she said out loud to the champion of the raven queen that they should use her power while it benefitted them and then find a loophole to get Vax out of her service. and she is so valid for that. 15/10 would do the same).

We had a PC, a dozen or so NPCs, and an entire arc last campaign—and then a whole 4-part series!—that dealt with wizard hubris and its unfortunate consequences. Ludinus was one of those NPCs! What makes you think that Mr. “let’s steal a holy artifact and instigate a war” “should try friends sometime” “Essek looks forward to never seeing his face again” “Trent Ikithon can keep abusing children it’s not my problem” Da’leth suddenly has people’s best interests in mind?

He and the Ruby Vanguard need to be stopped, and Orym, being a person whose driving motivation is “to protect,” is willing to do what needs to be done, even when it sucks.

Take: ooohoohoo Orym’s alignment might be shifting! We need Dorian to get him back on track!

My opinion: No? To both these statements? Firstly, Orym’s alignment isn’t shifting, at least I don’t think so. I’m not an expert on D&D alignments (I think they should be more descriptive than prescriptive/ultimately they matter less than character choices, arcs, and narratives), but I would guess that fighting to maintain the balance of nature and to stop those that would harm others for their own gain is still pretty in line with neutral good? I could maybe see an argument for that being more lawful good, but it didn’t seem like those people were talking about a shift along the horizontal axis.

Secondly, I think Dorian would do the exact same thing Orym is doing. Was that not the whole draw of the Spider Queen’s crown during ExU Prime? Power to protect and save his friends? So I don’t think Dorian would see anything wrong with how Orym is acting, much less take him to task over it.

Take: Look! Orym told Keyleth about Imogen’s mom and said “I don’t care” when Imogen complained! Bad! Mean! Selfish!

My opinion: idk that felt more like Liam being a brat to Laura than anything else.

Like, yes Liam/Orym had his own goals in that convo which were unexpected and uncomfortable, but I don’t think he was wrong to point that out. The moment Keyleth swore to take down Liliana, you could feel everyone in Bell’s Hells get really tense, and I am certain that Keyleth, who has 20 wisdom and ~30 years of experience leading her people and politicking, clocked that instantly. And Orym would have clocked that immediately, and in an effort to make sure that their group had the confidence of a very powerful druid and world leader, decided that full transparency was the way to go.

And I don’t know, this is largely speculation, but Keyleth having that information might mean that she will make sure Imogen doesn’t have to be the one to take down Liliana? Or it might make her more sympathetic and willing to show some mercy to her?

Leaning more fully into speculation bc this relies mostly on inference and assumption: while I do think that Keyleth deserves to know what’s going on with Vax, withholding that information at this juncture might have been another tactical decision from Orym. We don’t know how Keyleth has mourned over the last 30 years, but we know that she’s been angry and we know that losing Vax was and is devastating. I feel like finding out that the love of your life (“forever and ever and ever and always” “I’ll never get over you”) is suffering extreme torment such that the followers of his god are in a period of mourning, basically implying that you’ve lost him all over again, that potentially the one reassurance that you would see him again has been ripped from you, etc., etc. would cause anyone to break down on a good day. Add on the fact that Keyleth is gravely, gravely injured, and you’re basically asking for her to be completely out of commission, because 1) holy moly talk about new trauma, old trauma, grief, longing, guilt, etc. bro I’m an emotional wreck just thinking about Vax and I’m not the one living through it, and 2) that would be a lot of stress on her already extremely stressed body, the consequences of which could be very bad.

It’s a tough decision to make, and while I’m not sure I 100% agree with Orym’s, I think it’s a defensible position.

Anyway thanks for reading this far, I hope you enjoyed my analysis. Again, I don’t want to fight or get into arguments, but I’m down for some brief discussions! Emphasis on brief because I can fall into a rabbit hole very easily, which means this will be the only thing I can think of and I have other things I want to do, shadowgast to write, fearnechetney to draw, and this post already took several hours over two days to write after weeks of mental build up.

[lavenderknivess]

i’ve been trying to articulate coherent thoughts on imodna after the new episodes and laudna’s meeting with the raven queen and i think my brain has finally pieced things together so here is a rant (positive) about it.

i think it is SO poignant how the matron says that laudna is truly alive and NOT anathema, AND that there is a way for laudna to be truly free of delilah considering we know all of these have been struggles for laudna since the beginning.

like-

laudna feels like she has been cursed because she has! she’s been living this horrific undead existence after being brutally murdered and on top of that isolated for decades with no one but her abuser invading her very thoughts. she’s only incredibly recently been able to gain control of delilah and prevent her from always watching.

and for the matron to show how laudna’s string becomes golden as it reaches imogen’s demonstrates how powerful their connection really is and i think it’s more than just soulmateism. The love between imogen and laudna has ALWAYS transcended words and everything, really, even before they became explicitly romantic. and the fact that their love is part of what makes laudna truly alive? and it’s a call back to “you have loves. You seem pretty alive to me”

i was so worried about how the conversation between laudna and the matron would go and it was so healing.

[notori]

On a more genuine note from my previous post though: I do not think Imodna will go the same way as Vaxleth for a few reasons.

Vax's story was very personal to Liam. It always frustrates me when people act like the Raven Queen 'took Vax away' (and thus she is a bad goddess) when in fact she answered his prayer and granted his wish. Vax's story is about "Take me instead!" - not some kind of "Don't let Vex die!", and certainly not someone who was raised from the dead without their consent and bound like a puppet. Unless such an ending is expressly what Marisha wants for her character, I don't see it being narratively satisfying. Even if Laudna dies in sacrifice to save the others, because of the breadth of Delilah's power, it would be more of a general "I'm dying to save everyone" and less personal (and impactful) than Vax's trading his life for Vex's.

I joked about how this is Delilah Briarwood vs Laura Bailey again, so don't sweat it, but it's true! The players play their characters differently. Liam loves tragedy and plays it well; Laura loves romance and plays it well. Percy also had a dark streak with a hunger for power, and Vex would not let him go. I see more parallels with themes like: "I feel cruel, but in control." and "Take the mask off." Meanwhile, Imogen and Keyleth are different characters and their love interests have different relationships with death. In the end, the reason Keyleth could not do anything against the Raven Queen isn't because she's a god and Keyleth is not, but because Vax - as a paladin - chose to honour his faith and uphold his end of the deal. Imogen is not in that position because Laudna is not in that position. Laudna may see herself as just a puppet, or a risk, or a dead end - but we the audience, and Imogen, know that she is not (maybe a bit of a calculated risk). If anything, I see us on the precipice of an arc of Imogen inspiring Laudna to fight for her independence again and figuring out a way to do that (this is a world of magic after all).

And that theme of fighting for independence is something that has been there since the beginning. We have seen it both in analysis and confirmed on 4SD that Laudna's relationship with Delilah is in many ways similar to struggling with addiction. And now, into year three of C3, we are really seeing that take form when things get rough. When things get out of control, when you get desperate, that's when you grasp at anything to make it easier. It would be a real kick in the teeth to have her not overcome that struggle. Of course, there's the possibility that she does overcome that struggle by getting rid of Delilah and dying as a result. But out of game it has been referred to more in line with addiction that is constantly managed rather than addiction that is ended cold turkey - which for some people is the only way. I'll admit this one is more a personal preference but I do see it overall leaving a bad taste if Laudna were to die from Delilah in some way (again). Presuming they resolve issues with the solstice and resurrection spells, True Resurrection does exist and I'm certain the Hells would work off a 25k GP debt to bring Laudna back for good (which I see as more of a final episode/epilogue/post-game situation).

Regardless, it's a beautiful story and I'm sure that whatever happens will be what the players want. However, in this case I genuinely don't see them repeating something they have done before. Although we saw many parallels last night, there is still much which sets Imodna and Vaxleth apart narratively.

[staticrevelations]

constantly thinking about Not Strong Enough by boygenius and imodna

black hole opened in the kitchen

the shade creepers at Zhudanna's place

drag racing through the canyon

the deathwish run in the ravine in bassuras

do you see us getting scraped up off the pavement?

imogen's crawler wiping out and a barely-alive laudna rushing over to her, imogen rushing to laudna's dead body after the showdown with otahan

i don't know why i am the way i am not strong enough to be your man i lied, i am just lowering your expectations

imogen asking to kiss laudna, an unspoken expression of desire for something more than friendship, and laudna immediately feeling unworthy of imogen's love and affection and telling her she lost her way and is afraid she's a bad person

half a mind that keeps the other second guessing

delilah a constant presence in laudna's head, both of them torn as to whether to use the power of delilah and ruidus or fight it

always an angel, never a god

both of them doomed to be the playthings and messengers of higher powers, never able to have true control over themselves or their lives

i don't know why i am the way i am there's something in the static i think i've been having revelations

imogen's struggle to find out why she suddenly started hearing people in her head, the way it always sounded like static to the point that the noise was starting to become too much until one day laudna showed up and it sounded like music, like a revelation in the flesh

skip the exit to our old street and go home go home alone

both of them wanting, more than anything else, to settle down and live a quiet life together in their own little home

[lespetitesmortsde]

break my little imodna heart?

Great timing anon, because I was in the midst of this little pile of trauma when your ask came in. Death, abandonment, angst, etc. Post-resurrection.

You could read on AO3 if you prefer: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51497527

Anchor

She wakes up with her head in Imogen’s lap, Imogen’s fingers combing through her hair as she jolts up from a sharp crack across her cheek.

She wakes up and there’s a gnome-looking lady with white hair and a scar across one eye leaning over her, studying her. The gnome pulls back, but her brow remains furrowed.

She wakes up and FCG’s voice is incredibly loud in her ears. “Laudna! You’re back!” and he sounds thrilled, exuberant, and she’s filled with confusion. Her eyes dart around the room and there’s someone pretty who looks like they might be familiar, wielding a bow and aiming an arrow straight at her.

FCG draws her attention back to them, “Are you back? Are you okay?”

Quieter, moving from behind her to beside her, Imogen asks, “Is it you?”

There is not enough time to think no space to breathe there isn’t – Is it you? Or is it –

Chetney jumps in, “Say something only Laudna would know, quick!”

She looks at Chet and struggles to say something, for her vocal chords to rub, for the air to pass through them. She looks over at Orym and then back to Chetney.

Rocking back and forth on his wheel, FCG frets, “Uh-oh, she can’t speak?”

And finally, finally, her voice works mostly like it’s supposed to. It comes out weaker, wispier, and so much rougher than she recalls it being for a long, long time. “I don’t…” she looks around before settling her gaze on Imogen. “Have you found anything else out about your mom?”

It feels like the room collectively lets out a strained breath.

She’s introduced to the strangers treating her like a bomb with an unknown timer. When the gnome says it’s just her, that Delilah isn’t around anymore, Imogen lets out the most relieved sigh. But she’s not so sure that getting rid of Delilah could be that easy. And despite Imogen’s assurances, she doesn’t trust these people, not the ones she was sacrificed for.

She wakes up and she is groggy for most of the day, feels more dead than she usually does, floats around on auto-pilot, made easier when she’s holding Imogen’s hand.

It’s getting harder to hold Imogen’s hand. Oh, Imogen is there and treats her gently when she’s within reach, but there’s a distance between them now. She can feel it in her shadow, creeping up through her boots, when Imogen moves away and lets others come between them.

Her attention feels foreign, translucent. She can focus on the conversation for a couple of minutes at a time, even contribute a little, but she loses the time and space in between. One moment they’re in the house she woke up in. The next they’re out on the street. Then she’s in the castle. They’re going to eat.

It’s like she blinks and–

She wakes up and there’s potato soup in front of her. The others purposefully left the spot beside her for Imogen, but even though she feels delirious, like reality — if this even is reality — bends in waves around her, she knows Imogen like no one else does. She knows that her friend, her best friend, first looked for any other seat than the one beside her.

And her heart breaks when Imogen finally sinks into the chair, accepting her fate.

She’s pretty sure it doesn’t happen in real-life, that it’s the echoes of her resurrection, but every so often she hears Orym’s voice around the periphery. You deserve to be more than a footnote in Delilah’s story.

Please. Come back.

There are people here who need you.

And they’re lovely words, truly, she would love for them to be real, to be honest, to be truthful.

But the only person who ever came close to needing her, and doesn’t actually need her at all, can’t wait to get away from her.

She’s left wondering what the point of it all was. They wasted precious time coming after her, fighting off Delilah, traipsing around the horrors of her mind, boxes open and emptied. They used up precious favours for someone who will only hold them back.

She was already dead.

Why is she back?

She doesn’t have an answer and she doubts any of the rest of them have much of one either.

She wakes up and she doesn’t know why.

Lady Vex’ahlia gives her a ring, says it will protect her, but she can’t help wondering what for? Everyone has already put far too much effort into getting her undead again. But Orym tells her to take it and his words calling her back to the land of the living drift back through her head, so she slips it on her finger.

The weight is different from the ring Imogen gave her. Maybe she’ll need to give Imogen’s back, even though she loves it and she’ll miss being able to look at it and touch it.

Maybe this ring will help her bear the loss of the other one.

The group is getting ready to go to bed in the castle and she’s fine with that, she wants them to have a comfortable night. But she can’t. She can’t do that. No matter what all they’ve done for her, she can’t do that.

She’ll spend her night alone. Try to get her thoughts into some sort of cohesive thing. Maybe in the morning she can be who they remember her to be. Maybe in the morning, they will say goodbye and they will leave her behind now that they recognise how weak she is, how much of an anchor she is, dragging them down, down, down to depths unknown.

At some point, Imogen tries reassuring her that they’d do it again, that it wasn’t a big deal, that she’s not a nuisance. Imogen even says she missed her. So much.

Her traitorous little heart sinks its talons into that too deeply, pulls it too sharply into her chest.

When the time comes, it will hurt to remove it, like bisecting her heart and plucking it right out from her ribcage.

She tells them to have a restful night, that she’s going to go sleep by the Sun Tree. Wants to let some of the hope and healing seep into her bones from its roots.

She wakes up and there are fancy sheets strewn along the ground and the whole lot of them are sprawled across them underneath the tree. Fearne is cuddling Orym. Imogen, maybe because she was once more pushed into her old normal place by everyone else, is beside her. Imogen’s head is on her shoulder.

Maybe she didn’t want to be alone, after all. Maybe it’ll take more than one night to wrestle her thoughts and her mind back to the land of the living.

Maybe she can have this one indulgence as a departing gift.

She is exhausted, but she lies awake long past when everyone else falls asleep. Her heart thuds sluggishly in her chest.

Imogen against her is a comfort, one she does not deserve, of course, never has, but in the last thirty-odd years, she’s learned to take the rare good things when they come along. Not to ask questions. And the last two years have been great. They’ve been the best.

When she is left behind, reliving those two years will sustain her for decades, if not more than that. She can live a week, a month, inside each step they’ve walked together.

She could live a year within the confrontation between Imogen and Delilah in the tree, could go without food if only there’s the echo of Imogen shouting out, “Delilah Briarwood, we’re going to sunder you.”

That all means so much. Imogen was so angry. She glances down at Imogen now, eyes closed, the tiredness more apparent in sleep than when awake. She hopes Imogen rests well.

Orym’s voice and Orym’s voice alone once more ripples through her head.

She wakes up from being dead and the only question that haunts her is why didn’t Imogen try to bring her back.

[kingofterrors]

Imodna / Southern Gothic Playlist

Feeling the brainrot in these post-Episode 65 days, so found myself wandering back to my Imodna playlist, which I've been gradually adding to over the course of a couple of years (October 2021 to be precise...). In the course of which I realised I really liked it. So in lieu of a new Laura Bailey playlist, here it is to share with you all! And a little word about each song, hidden under the cut for obvious reasons!

No Lights on the Horizon - Metric: "If it wasn't for your kindness / I think I might be dead / If it wasn't for the way you said / "Oh, stay with me instead". Pre-stream Imodna. We know Imogen was on the verge of giving up before she met Laudna. They face the future together.

Take Your Time - Martha Bean, Jon Dix: "When all seems lost / You’re frightened to death of it all / Hold my hand / I'll be sure you don't fall". Their wishes for each other.

Better Days - OneRepublic: "Every day is like another storm, yeah / I'm just trying not to go insane / Yeah, and the city's shining so bright / So many dark nights, so many dark days / But any time I feel the paranoia / I close my eyes and I pray". Both Imogen and Laudna have been struggling against the weight of the world against them - but together better days might lie ahead.

Waterbound - Fretless, Ruth Moody: An Imogen song - the sense of being ripped away from everything you've ever known and thrown into a new world.

Heat Lightning - Mitski: I'm not immune to Mitski for Imodna! This is so Imogen - yearning for Laudna with every breath, not sure how long she can keep it under wraps, and ready to surrender.

Talk - Hozier: We talk about Laudna not having "accessed that part of my brain" a lot, but I'm convinced that Imogen is very much in touch with that part of her brain. And equally convinced that she holds some of that lesbian guilt about feeling desire. She keeps it locked down. Laudna's not ready for it. Or as Hozier puts it: "I won't deny I've got in my mind now all the things we'd do / So I'll try to talk refined for fear that you find out how I'm imaginin' you".

Nightmares on Repeat - Emily Jane White: A Laudna song, for both lyrics and feel. Laudna doesn't know what she's feeling. She's been cut off from those feelings for so long. But she's sure feeling something. "Holding your hand, keeps me here / And all the ways you stand, keeps me here / For the light was not there / For years, upon years".

A Match into Water - Pierce the Veil: Episode 33. Laudna snatched away. This is all Imogen's grief and pain in song form.

Chasing Twisters - Delta Rae: Okay, I'm also not immune to this song for Imodna, even though I know it's on everyone's list. It just fits, okay?? Imogen's feelings for Laudna, her grief and desire to 'save' her one last time.

Autumn Rain - Rachel Sandy: Laudna's back, and Imogen is more aware of how she feels than ever. But is Laudna seeing something new in Imogen as well? "She feels like rain in autumn / Like the earth before a storm / Electric and deep-rooted".

Uphill - Lori McKenna: "When the road under your feet is dark and feels wrong / And you find yourself lost and all your confidence gone / And the stars over your head through the clouds won't be revealed / I'll walk with you, even if it's uphill". A new commitment to each other with this new lease on life.

Cold Water Swimming - Quiet Houses: Imogen's hope, but kept closely under wraps. "I’m still in love with you / But telling you is just too much of a risk".

Pockets of Stones - Charm of Finches: Both Imogen and Laudna realise their own vulnerabilities, their capacity to hurt. Their love becomes security and strength in the face of that.

Easy Silence - The Chicks: The strength both Imogen and Laudna have in the company of the other - the space they have for each other. Exandria is going to hell in a handbasket. But they make it bearable for one another. "Easy silence that you make for me / It's okay when there's nothing more to say to me / And the peaceful quiet you create for me / And the way you keep the world at bay for me / The way you keep the world at bay".

[sotvrna]

tonight, our home

Pairing: Laudna/Imogen Temult

Rating: T

Word Count: 9726

Relevant tags: Trans Character; modern/sci-fi au; kind of a take on soulmates aus but not really. i use the term loosely; aspec imodna if you squint; featuring some callowmoore;

Summary: 

A chance encounter, a clash with destiny, and finding what was never lost.

or

The one in which life runs through tortuous roads, wanderers find solidarity, Imogen and Laudna struggle with that which is designed, and love is just as complicated as it is easy.

Note: This fic was written for the ITFC Fanfic Exchange.

Read on AO3

[captainsspnanon]

C3E65 reaction

Imogen Laudna stuff in it's own separate untagged post. Don't search it out if you love the pairing, I'm not here for drama.

FUCKING fanTASTIC episode!!!! ALL of it!

Looking at the timeline for this, as I finished watching late last night but immediately went to bed rather than typing up my reaction, as I always then spent like, 2 or 3 hours on tumblr after no matter how much I say I'm just going to make my reaction then go to sleep.

We got some solid conversation between the groups, and Laudna's freakout was 100% justified. As much as team wildemount did have their own struggles (and they DID!), it was a much more comforting trip than team issylra, especially with all the downtime they got. (had team issylra gotten those five days of wibbly timeline, i'm not sure if it would have been downtime, or if it would have been hishari drama or other drama.)

At the start of the episode, both my mom and I were a bit confused as to why Ashton was so chipper. However, when they had their conversation with FCG about trying to do better, not necessarily being okay but not being bad either, finding a purpose, actively engaging in friendship rather than avoiding it for fear of being burnt again, THEN it made sense. It's certainly one of the times where I would have preferred Taliesin to show more of the emotional transition on screen, but that's not how Tal RPs, and I'm used to that. 4 Sided Dives/Talks are always the best to find out what's truly going on with Tal's PCs, which is a sign of how much he has the inner life for them, and also (in my slightly negative opinion) a sign of how much he isn't really showing it outright in main campaign. And I admit my usual annoyance with Ashton asking Milo to make something but not verbalizing it so that the cast can be surprised when Taliesin shows whatever it was off. I didn't mind it to start, and it made sense with a lot of Percy's things to not take up time, but I've since learned that Taliesin will just do this all the time and yeah. I'm over it. However, by the end of the episode we know at least that the immovable rod was put in the hammer, as well as the scatter spell crystals, so at the very least we know a good chunk, so I feel better about it.

No real comments on FCG's emotional state, especially re: FRIDA, as he right now seems to be keeping it pushed down. However, I did appreciate how much he pushed back on other party members in regards to the opinions of the gods. Things did get smoothed over a bit more easily than I was expecting it to, based on the comments from 6sd, but at the same time it makes absolute sense as this party really is the 'smooth things over' party, especially when compared with VM and M9. I don't consider it a bad thing, tbh, even though I love the interparty drama, because it's a different dynamic that's being explored.

As I've already talked about getting spoiled about the imodna kiss, I'll keep this section brief. 1) I adore how they clearly forgot how Matt held his face to do Zhudanna and I love that they both nearly lost it. 2) Marisha flailing whenever getting romanced will never not be funny. 3) I actually hope that when we next get her on 4sd, she can talk more about the fact that she built a PC to be 'unromanceable'. We know that Liam had designed Caleb to not have another romance, and we saw how that fell apart. I wonder what her thought process was behind it and how she feels about it going forwards, as Liam made the choice with Caleb to RP the unrequited, and then take the steps for the requited, whereas Laura took the initiative with this romance. 4) Pour one out for my mom who is mourning the platonic friendship that she felt mirrored very strongly a friendship that she has which she was enjoying seeing portrayed.

OKay, the NON-romance stuff! I'm very excited to see how it plays out with both Imogen and Laudna feeling the need for power from sources that they feel they can't trust. Laudna not even being able to admit that she wants the power from Delilah, this could be a very interesting road to go down. AND LUDINUS YOU FUCK. So excited to see where else he's dropping his propaganda. Is it just Marquet? It's GOT to be around all of Exandria, right???

Moving on to Fearne, Chetney, and Orym - I'm a little disappointed they didn't share more information with Ajit, but it was a good conversation nonetheless. There were a few things that he said which made me feel as if Matt was leaving a few options open for if the party wanted to do a few paid tasks in town, a la the Mighty Nein. I didn't see any of them being accepted, but I liked that they were still put out there, even if the party is pretty much mainlining the plot at this point. The bounty hunter sent by the shopkeeper was unexpected (or would have been if I hadn't gotten spoiled, dammit) and was a fun mini-combat! I wonder how long Matt had that sitting in his pocket.

THE DUSKMAVEN. That whole scene was SO good! I was a bit surprised at first with how emotional Orym was, considering he didn't really have a connection with her beforehand, until I realized that this was the first time he's been in any temple since the shit hit the fan. I suspect that no matter WHOSE temple it was, he would have been the same way, with the possible exception of the Dawnfather. Having multiple party members receive a vision was definitely a good play, as this moves from FCG being the only one with actual interaction to four members. Vax as an orb forever screaming? fun times fun times. ...there's the morbid angsty part of me that hopes they share that information with Keyleth who shares it with VM. LOOK I LIKE SOME GOOD HURT/COMFORT SOMETIMES OKAY.

LILLIANA ON RUIDUS. LUDINUS ON RUIDUS. IRA ON RUIDUS TALKING WITH REILORA. oh I cannot WAIT to see how things go from here! MOON'S HAUNTED Y'ALL AND THEY ARE GOING BACK WITH A GUN.

[sleep-escapes-me]

There’s not a lot of imodna crossover fics I’m noticing. Don’t get me wrong I live laugh love canon compliant all day everyday, it’s my preference

but seriously where are the avatar aus where Imogen struggles with being a bender siding with the equalists because she doesn’t wanna become her mom who is probably definitely not good but oh no Laudna is there too???

Where’s my domestic girls in the dragon quest universe who unfortunately just moved to the village the hero decides to run through and now have to come up with a convincing side quest shenanigan to give them????

Like you don’t get it I need Imogen in a final fantasy world running a chocobo ranch who then catches the eye of local farm girl Laudna!!

Where is Laudna’s wayward home for abandoned Pokémon but oops it’s just Imogen??

[killermanatee07]

Same, I rewatched some scenes last night and I’m fully convinced that they are in love with each other. They just have so much going on mentally as individuals and they are so focused on not losing each other again that they forget to prioritize the core of their relationship. I feel like both Imogen and Laudna are at least slightly aware of their feelings. Beau and Yasha was almost the opposite. They knew they were attracted to one another in a physical sense but it took a lot of time for them to really acknowledge that. Where as Imogen and laudna are very connected in a mental sense and they know who each other are fully. They already reached that unconditional love but they skipped the part where they understand what all those strong feelings mean. Now they are struggling to define it and when people like Yu come into play, it sort of turns everything upside down. Specifically with Imogen bc she WAS jealous. She just doesn’t want to realize the why. They both want whats best for one another so much that they don’t realize that they already have it.

I really think someone is going to have to point it out to them. If not one of them is gonna break at some point and be so fed up with all their internal feelings that they are going to admit it without even realizing it.

Anyway, I love Imodna and I really hope they get to be happy together.

I was just rewatching some imodna scenes and at this point i'm convinced Laura and Marisha are playing a game of chicken over who will get the other's character to confess first

[criticalbeauregard]

okay someone asked me to elaborate so here’s the imodna teenage dream post:

minor spoilers for campaign 3 below the cut (only explicitly up to episode 23)

i will preface by saying this is not something i’ve been thinking about for very long. it just came on shuffle while i was cooking earlier and i ran in my room and made that post. also, i usually do character song analysis just for myself in google docs (which i did a lot during c2) so i’m going to try to make this comprehensible and just point out the most relevant lyrics (because if i talked about all the lyrics, which i could, this would be way too long)

verse 1: most important lines are “I know you get me, so I let my walls come down” and “before you met me, i was alright, but things were kinda heavy” which to me is specifically imogen pov. she has specifically used “letting walls down” imagery to refer to her powers and talked about how meeting laudna was important because she was different from everything else (musical), here meaning “not heavy”. 

pre-chorus: the pre-chorus is mostly fun and i read as the life they could have together/want to have past all the bad stuff (”laudna, lets move here when everything is done!”). a notable line is “you and I, will be young forever” which could be kind of melancholically interpreted as a nod to the fact that laudna will never age. 

chorus: there’s a lot here. the idea of the “teenage dream” is something i found interesting and didnt even make the connection of imogen having literal dreams when i made the original post. however, i think the “you make me feel like i’m living a teenage dream” is from both of their pov because neither of them got a normal childhood/teenage life. love is something neither of them expected to experience. a more literal approach for imogen is the fact that she is racked with nightmares all the time but laudna can be her waking “dream”. “let’s run away and don’t ever look back” of course references laudna going from town to town and eventually finding imogen and taking her away from her home where she was struggling. “my heart stops when you look at me. just one touch, now baby i believe, this is real” i see more from laudna’s pov. laudna’s heart is something references a lot in fanfic (i’ll talk about this more at the bridge), specifically that it beats very slowly so the heart stopping being read as literal is funny to me. the next part of that lyrics comes from my own interpretation of laudna’s feelings. i don’t think laudna would ever believe imogen (or anyone) could truly love her romantically, so it would take a real “touch”/a explicit confession or move for her to “believe this is real”.

verse 2: more cute stuff, i see this as a recounting of their time on the road before bell’s hells and realizing how well they work together.

bridge: “i’ma get your heart racing” is just such a fanfic imodna line. a lot of the time in fanfic i’ve read laudna’s heart “racing” is written as it just beating at a normal human speed. i find it endearing to imagine imogen taking this (or laudna’s ability to blush, which is also used often) as a “challenge”, for lack of a better word. “let you put your hands on me” i think could go either way but i generally hear as more of an imogen line as well. whether this is because imogen seems to be less physically affectionate than laudna, with people that aren’t laudna (perhaps because of her powers and how being close to people makes them worse). but it’s also worth nothing the fact that laudna is generally viewed as scary or potentially harmful, especially in relation to her hands at times (long nails, black ichor, more recently breaking the stone etc.) so imogen saying she wants laudna to “put her hands” on her is important. 

i think that’s all for now! the rest repeats the pre-chorus, chorus and bridge. like i said i thought of this today so if i think of anything else to add i will later. overall just the idea of a “teenage dream” and the imagery it has makes it a kind of fun pop imodna song that can actually be sad if you examine it but doesn’t have to be. if you read this whole thing you’re insane but i love you if anyone has anything else to add feel free to do so. also if someone has posted about this/put this on an imodna playlist before pls lmk! otherwise if you think my takes are way off and you want to tell me about it please be kind. <3

[yesifitswithyou]

I Wish it wasn't a Dream | Critical Role

for some reason this was inspired by this fanart. don't as me why, i don't understand my brain either. anyways, here's some fluff and angst about campaign 3 episode 34. yes, this is an Imodna fic. yes, this is sad.

btw, this was done super quickly earlier today so please excuse any mistakes.

also available on AO3 !

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Summary:

Laudna visits Imogen's dreams

[Major spoilers for Episode 34]

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She was in a field. The wind was gentle against her hair and the tall grass caressed her calves. It was strangely calm.

Imogen looked around her, trying to find anything.

Where was she?

“Imogen?” That voice.

Her neck almost cracked at the speed.

She was there. She was there, right in front of her. She’s here. She’s okay. She’s here. She’s standing. She’s here.

Her legs started running towards Laudna.

“Laudna!” Her arms wrapped her, relief flooding every vein. “I can’t believe- You’re here. You’re okay. You’re okay. You’re here.” Her throat tightened.

She heard Laudna exhale through her nose.

“I’m not here for long dear.”

Imogen’s heart stopped. She looked up. “What do you- No, you can’t- What do you mean? You can’t leave m- us. We need you. I need you.”

Laudna’s smile warmed her heart. “You’re more than capable to be by yourself.” There was that teasing voice. Imogen rolled her eyes affectionately.

“You know what I mean.”

“I do. I do.” Laudna looked in the distance and right back at Imogen. “Shall we sit?”

Imogen smiles, remembering their travels together. Those evening where it was just the two of them in a field filled with flowers, the warmth of the sun tanning her skin and the breeze caressing their cheekbones.

Soon they were sitting in the dirt, Imogen’s head on Laudna’s lap as she played with her hair. Imogen couldn’t get her eyes off Laudna.

“I thought I lost you.” Imogen’s voice shy, scared of going back to the nightmare.

“I’m always going to be with you. No matter what happens.” Silence washed over them again for a couple of seconds until Laudna spoke up. “Imogen, it isn’t your fault.”

“What?” She was confused. Genuinely confused.

“It isn’t your fault. Fearne, Orym, me. It isn’t your fault.”

Flashes of that day ran over her like skirmish crawlers. She sat up to look her in the eye.

“I should’ve done something to stop her. I shouldn’t have ran. I-”

“You did everything you could do to protect us. That’s who you are.” Her cold hand cupped Imogen’s face. “And you did great. You saved them.”

Imogen’s hand covered Laudna’s. “But I couldn’t safe you.” Tears welled up in her eyes again. “I should’ve done more.”

“You did everything you could.” Her face was so close, her breath brushed against her lips, “You did great, sweetheart. I’m so proud of you.” Her cold lips kissed Imogen’s burning forehead. More tears streamed down her face.

“This is a dream, isn’t it.”

Laudna nodded. “It is.”

“I wish it wasn’t.” Her voice was trembling, her eyes struggled to stay open and her throat hurt with each sob.

“Me too.” Their foreheads touched in the most intimate embrace. Both pairs of eyes shut as they enjoyed each other’s presence. “Promise me you’ll stop blaming yourself?”

Imogen shook her head, her eyes still closed. “I can’t. I can’t. I- I just want you back.” Her forehead felt cold as Laudna took distance. Her free hand took Imogen’s chin and lifted it up, making her look her in the eyes.

“I love you, okay?” Her words felt stable, grounded. Imogen felt the truth behind them. “I don’t want you to blame yourself over this. You did nothing wrong. It’s not your fault.”

“I love you, too.” Her tears distorted her words. “I don’t know what I’m gonna do without you.”

“You’re not alone.” Something cold was pressed against her hand. Some cold metal. Imogen looked down at it. It was the ring she had gifted her. “Keep it for me?”

More tears and more sobs, but she nodded in agreement. “I miss you so much.”

“I’m always going to be right next to you.” Laudna kissed Imogen’s hand, the ring inside her fist. “We’ll meet again, I promise.”

Imogen opened her eyes. Tears stained her face and the bed under her.

She looked next to her, only to find an empty bed.

She cried again.

[nat1nonsense]

@muthserra Absolutely I can elaborate on this!!! Let’s fucking do this, this is gonna be one hell of a long post!!!

So starting with the title, “Hold Me Like a Grudge”, The title and repeating lyric is very reminiscent of the dynamic between Imogen and Laudna during their fight after Laudna accidentally shattered Imogen’s crystal. Grudges are usually held out of spite or out of stubbornness, and more often than not they’re held tightly and for a long time. To hold someone like a grudge would insinuate that you’re holding onto them tightly and for a long time, even through that stubbornness and spite, or maybe even anger. There was something about their interactions with each other during this time that felt like they were indirectly asking each other to hold each other like a grudge. Even though they were barely talking to each other, they both wanted to be held by the other as tightly as the grudges they were holding at the time.

^ There’s nothing really deep behind these lyrics specifically, it just feels deeply reminiscent of how Laudna, while she was barely on speaking terms with Imogen, would always make attempts at starting a conversation with Imogen and even though Laudna meant well in these moments, she always got shut down by Imogen

^ This line alone makes me think of Yu/Dusk inserting themself into the imodna dynamic, every time Yu/Dusk would be interacting with Imogen or Laudna, there tended to be this underlying feeling on part of either Imogen or Laudna that was like “Dusk seems really cool, but I wish I was talking to Laudna/Imogen”

^ Ruidus vibes, next question (no but really, not only does this give me ruidus vibes, but it also gives me that “fuck it all, we have each other” vibe that Imogen and Laudna have when they’re together)

^ It’s not an Imodna analysis post if I don’t talk about how much Imogen and Laudna lean on each other. The world hasn’t been kind to either of them, they’ve kind of just been thrown into some not great situations and they’ve both had to figure it out as they go (“the world is always spinning and I can’t keep up”). The harder it gets, the faster the world spins, both Imogen and Laudna realize they’re facing things that they can’t deal with alone as individuals, and it’s okay to occasionally need to lean on someone who can help you get by (“…can’t do this on my own”).

Imogen and Laudna are both also “part time soulmates, full time problems” for each other, just as much as they lean on each other. The love that Imogen and Laudna have for each other more often than not is forced to take a back seat to the problems and the baggage that they both bring to the relationship, Laudna with Delilah and everything that comes with that, and Imogen with being Ruidus-born and everything that comes with figuring that out, especially during the time of the Apogee Solstice. For as much as these two are soulmates, platonically or romantically, they both come with their individual problems and struggles that can cause tension in strife in their relationship. Then it all comes back at the end of the chorus with “hold me like a grudge” which remains reminiscent of the tone/vibes of the imodna fight and how even when they were arguing, they wanted to be held as tightly as their grudges

^ Focusing less on the fight that Imogen and Laudna had, and focusing more on the overall vibes of Imodna, the idea of “we’ll do more than just get by together” is very Imogen and Laudna given how they both don’t just want to get by, they want to live a soft and comfortable life together. Even though they thought things would’ve been a little easier by now, and with things not going exactly as they planned for their future (“I thought I knew better, I thought it would get better // I figured somehow by now, I would have got it together”), this idea of a soft and comfortable life is something that they both want for each other and something they’re entirely committed to (“and if you put your, put your heart in it, heart in it”)

Hold Me Like a Grudge by Fall Out Boy as an imodna song, especially (but not exclusively) during their fight………… I think I’m on to something

[utilitycaster]

No idea if it's here on your blog but I'm curious as to what you'd change in the Imodna dynamic to make it a viable ship? It's been a while aince I've listened to c3 since I got into c1, finally, so I'm curious as to what you mean.

Oh sure, I've talked about it before but the quick and dirty summary is: a few people have noted (and I've reblogged their posts but I don't know if I tagged them well) that Laudna's demeanor towards Imogen actually fits the dynamic more of a loving but just a touch clueless older relative? Like, she wants to protect Imogen from the horrors of the world, and that's admirable, but it comes off a bit as a well-meaning but slightly overbearing figure. You can see this with how Laudna often insists Imogen is perfectly capable or tends to go with more of an "it's going to be ok, you can handle this" instead of the more "I'm sorry, that sucks/that sounds hard" support that other members of the party have done because the thing is that Imogen doesn't know if she can handle this, nor do we as the audience! This was much more present early on, actually, and as the two of them have branched out a bit among the rest of the Hells it's gotten a bit better, so I'm optimistic that they can find a way forward, and that the ship will be infinitely more complex and interesting if it happens.

As the ask meme post sort of alluded to some of my initial dislike of the ship was because it felt very migratory (fem)slash fandom, ie, people applying the dynamic they had applied to Beau and Jester and, from what I understand, Vex and Keyleth, of more experienced outgoing person and naive sweet uwu bean who only have each other (which is already outright false per canon, and frankly isn't a dynamic I find terribly attractive or enjoyable for any ship) to two new characters simply because they were women played by Marisha and Laura and not because of who the characters actually were as people.

[I have also found, as someone who very much loves Marisha's characters but has fairly consistently loved Laura's characters even more, that this dynamic is always much more from the perspective of Marisha's character, with Laura's character turning into something entirely noncanonical, eg: how in a lot of shipping stuff for Imogen/Laudna, Imogen turns into a sweet helpless little girl who has bad dreams and headaches that Laudna kisses better, rather than one of the more morally ambiguous and quietly sinister members of the party.]

As time has moved on (and as I've uh...blocked some tags and occasionally people) now I'm much more in favor of the ship, provided the what I said in the first paragraph gets addressed. And to be honest I think there's a really good chance of that! I think there's an excellent chance that Imogen and Laudna, now that they have the security of other friends and aren't just struggling to survive and setting some differences aside because of that, can have more honest conversations and come to a point where romance is possible.