#the sky was unreal-y blue today

[goingsparebutwithprecision]

Kimono + tea ceremony + spontaneous temple visits

[romance-lover77]

Newt Scamander x Fem Muggle Reader Chapter 14

Plot: Blood and tears

Trigger Warning ⚠️: Alcohol addiction, Hurting others. Negativity and Depression

It was night, the sky was dark blue and the stars were radiant. Illuminating the whole sky as it accompanied the big beautiful round full moon. The streets were empty and silent. Most residents of the cities were peacefully sleeping in their beds while you were sitting on a chair writing on a table that was on the balcony of your apartment. Queenie had dropped you off at your apartment saying that you needed rest, at first you didn’t agree and insisted on going back to work at your shop. But she was very persistent so you had no choice but to rest.

All day you had slept and now that it was night. you couldn’t go back to sleep anymore so you decided that it was the right time to write a letter to Newt. At first it was nerve wracking but just remembering how kind and gentle Newt was, it became easier.

Dear Newt,

I hope you are safe and hopefully you can come back soon. I really miss your presence and the reason I'm writing to you so early without receiving your letter yet, is because I need to tell you something very urgent. Today I visited the doctor and he gave me the news that I’m expecting…..Newt you’re going to be a father and I hope that this news gives you joy just as it did to me because no matter what I am keeping this baby. Please give me an answer back as quickly as you can.

Love, Y/N

You kept staring at the letter and reading it repeatedly non-stop. The nerves were building up as your leg kept shaking up and down. Ghastly negative thoughts and scenarios play in your mind, imagining Newt being enraged and yelling all the things other men have told you. “You gorgeous? In your dreams! and now a mother, that poor child will have you as a mother”

Your breathing became heavy as you rapidly grabbed the paper and as you were about to crumble it, your conscience said to stop and send this letter because if you didn’t, regret will haunt you for the rest of your life. A heavy sigh releases from your lips and you took in some deep breaths

“You can do this….He deserves to know”

You place a hand on your stomach and your gaze softens “your father deserves to know, …..hopefully he wants to meet you but no matter what, I will take care of you my baby….”

You then chuckle in disbelief “Oh my goodness, I can’t believe i’m going to be a mother, it feels so unreal, I’m gonna love you with my whole entire being”

A big grin expresses on your face and all the nerves went away. You grasp the letter and begin to put it in an envelope, ready to be sent. You needed an owl so you got up from your seat, about to leave to go to Queenie’s to borrow her owl until something unexpected happened. Newt’s owl comes out of your chimney and flies over landing onto your shoulder.

The owl was holding an envelope with its mouth, your heart began to flutter just thinking of Newt writing to you and you grabbed the envelope excitedly. Opening it and immediately began to read it.

Dear, Y/N

I write this letter to you to say that I won’t be writing to you anymore. I’ve come to realize throughout this mission that I am in love with Tina and the truth is that night we spent together was just a rebound to me. It meant nothing to me and during that night ,all I could think about was Tina. After finishing this mission I won’t be going back to New York. I've decided to go back home to London and So this letter is a farewell, I hope you take care of yourself.

Sincerely, Newt

Your whole world shattered and it felt like your heart had been broken to pieces like it was made of porcelain. Your heart was bleeding and it began to throb in pain. It felt like the world around you began to slow down and your breathing as well. You winced in pain as it felt like your heart was slowing down and you were hyperventilating. In an instant you fell onto the ground, you began to scream and sob with immense pain.

Your emotions were so strong that your body couldn’t handle it and you fainted. As you lay motionless on the floor and you were in a deep sleep. You couldn’t even escape the pain in your sleep as the nightmares were haunting you.

7 hours before (since Spain is 7 hours ahead of New York)

10 pm Spain

Newt had finished writing his letter for you and instructed the owl to send it but without knowing that Tina had swapped the letter. The one that happened to be the one that you would later read in the future. Ever since Tina discovered that Newt is in love with you, she couldn’t take that kind of rejection and did the most insane wicked thing she has ever done. She falsificated Newt’s writing and knew what she had to write, to separate you and Newt. Making sure that you wouldn’t want to ever see him again. In that moment she had no remorse whatsoever and her plan wasn’t over.

It’s been a whole month that you had read the letter and that whole month ,you laid in bed all day. Not even going to work/opening your shop.You just felt soulless, depressed and seeing no point in life anymore. All you wanted to do was sleep forever so you wouldn’t be able to feel this pain and agony anymore. It was too much to handle, thinking how you wouldn’t be a good mother and being a single mother. You wouldn’t be able to handle the stares you would get from known people and how they would judge you on being pregnant without marriage. You would be an embarrassment and disgrace and you were now 2 months pregnant and the bump was barely showing, But most importantly the man you loved with all your strength, with all your being, with all heart and soul doesn’t love you back.

Of course Queenie has come to comfort you, and has tried to help you from feeling this way but nothing worked. Queenie couldn’t bear seeing you waste your life away and knew that if you continued this way, you would die of a broken heart.

When Queenie found out about the last letter that “Newt” had sent, she was immensely enraged, that her blood was boiling and had the deep desire of killing Newt for playing with your feelings. But fortunately Jacob barely convinced her not to do anything deranged.

When Jacob heard what happened about the letter, he was in disbelief. He refused to believe that Newt would do that, he knew him better than anyone(well except Theasus)else after spending so much time with him and being best friends. Jacob had suspicions of that letter, but he couldn’t prove it. Of course Jacob also found out about your pregnancy and felt pity for you. He cares for you, Queenie and he promised to be your child’s guardians.

It was the afternoon where one could hear the honks of cars in the streets from all the people getting out from work and going to their homes. Again you were lying motionless on your bed and the room was so silent and the only thing that you could hear was the clock ticking away.

But then without anticipation, there was a knock on the door and it slowly opened revealing Queenie. She stared at you with concern “Hey I came to check in on you, how are you feeling ?”

Queenie waited for your response but nothing was returned. You couldn’t speak at all but Queenie wasn’t angry because she understood. She slowly sat on the bed and placed her hand on your arm. You didn’t flinch or anything, you just stayed motionless as a doll.

“Y/n please, you can’t continue like this… there is so much to life! Don’t waste it just because a foolish idiot doesn’t know what’s good for him.”

Again no response, not because you didn’t want to but because you didn’t know what to respond. You couldn’t help feeling like this. Queenie frowned and squeezed your arm

“At least be strong for your baby, she or he needs a strong and loving mother-“

Just by bringing your baby to the topic, it instantly brought your attention. You turn you body to exchange looks with Queenie

“Queenie… I don’t think I'm capable of being a good mother, this baby should have been Tina’s. This baby should be inside her, she should have been the mother of Newt’s child, not me”

A few tears escapes from your eyes

Queenie couldn’t handle hearing you talk so negatively about yourself, for once she wanted you to be happy to be yourself because you are a beautiful amazingly kind woman who deserves more than those women who are ugly on the inside. So Queenie bursted

“NO! LISTEN HERE! IT WASN’T YOUR FAULT THAT YOU GOT PREGNANT NOR ITS THAT BABY’S FAULT, IT ISN’T YOUR FAULT THAT NEWT IS SO INCREDIBLY STUPID THAT HE COULDN’T REALIZE HOW GORGEOUS YOU ARE IN AND OUT. AND YOU WILL RAISE THIS BABY AND TEACH THEM THAT REAL BEAUTY COMES FROM SOMEONE’S KIND AND GOOD HEART AND NOT FROM SOMEONE’S APPEARANCE. YOU ARE GOING TO LIVE FOR THIS BABY! IS THAT UNDERSTOOD!”

You were completely appalled that your eyes were widened. Queenie has never been this angry with you until now but your conscience knew that you totally deserved to be scolded, you needed your senses back and they did come back

You sat up and a big amount of tears were flooding out of your eyes

“I’m so sorry for being such an idiot! You’re right! This baby is counting on me and I’m here just feeling pity for myself. I don’t need Newt when I have my baby, and- ....”

You stayed silent as you were collecting your thoughts but Queenie was puzzled on why you abruptly cut off

“Y/n?”

You slowly exchange looks with Queenie and a big grin appears on your face and Queenie was desperately confused

“I won’t ever be alone again, I have my baby to always be with me and I will give it so much love that my parents couldn’t give me”

Now it was Queenie’s turn to cry her eyes out, and abruptly hugged you. You needed this hug as you felt warmth and calmness.

“Ohhh Y\N! you weren’t ever alone! You have me and Jacob..We will always be here for you, I will always be here for you. You Y/n are my sister and soulmate, I love you…”

*side note: If you believe in soulmates, then just know that someone can have more than one soulmate. A lover soulmate, and a best friend soulmate

You softly smile “I love you too”

Queenie than breaks the hug and grasp both of your arms, and expresses a serious face

“Are you going to get up now? and tomorrow and all the days that come?”

You chuckle knowing how funny Queenie’s face seemed right now “Yes I promise”

Queenie shrieks in happiness “I’m so glad to hear that!! Now come on, get dressed i’m inviting you to dinner at my place, you and your baby must be starving”

In that precise moment your stomach growls loudly and a tint of red appears on your cheeks. “You have no idea” You and Queenie were giggling loudly, suddenly you stopped and tried to experience this happy moment as much as you could before it lasted. This moment made you realize how fortunate you were to be living and you didn’t need Newt to be happy. As you already had the people you loved.

But in really deep in your heart, you will always love him

Then a sudden knock from the front door interrupted your thoughts and startled both of you. Both of you exchange looks with confusion

“Y/n are you expecting someone?”

“No I-I rarely invite people into my apartment”

Queenie stands up from the bed and begins walking out of your bedroom. You stood up and followed, both of you were now at the front door. You gripped the door knob, ready fo open it when Queenie abruptly stops you

“No! Wait!”

You were agitated by her reaction “Huh!? What,why?

“I don’t want you to panic but there can be a possibility that this could either be Newt or Tina-“

Your eyes widened as you were about to panic “No that can’t be! Newt would be going back to London and there is no reason for Tina to come torment me again!”

“Y/n calm down, there is also a possibility that it’s someone else, but if it’s either one of them, I assure you i’m going to kill them”

You take a deep breath and nod, as you felt a bit eased since Queenie was here to protect you. You slowly opened the door as you both felt the suspense.

It was the unexpected, a person that you thought you would never ever see in your life again. The person who immensely hurt you and abandoned you. It was your mother

Your heart sank at the view and you couldn’t believe what your eyes were seeing. You didn’t want to believe and instead believe that this was just a terrible dream. While Queenie had no idea who this lady was and was curious on what she was doing here.

The lady appeared illy skinny, extremely dark eyes bags on her face, her teeth completely rotted and yellow. Her hair was so thin that you could see her scalp. Her clothes seemed like they were deteriorating and were so ripped and dirty.

“Y/n it’s me, your mother! I've come back!”

Your body was backing away as you repeatedly said no

“No no no no no no, this can’t be real, this can’t be real, you are suppose to be dead”

Queenie’s eyes widened and immediately knew why you were reacting that way. You had told her about your dreadful past that you desperately wanted to forget. To pretend like it never existed

As a child, after your father abandoned your mom and you she became extremely depressed and hatred filled her entire being. To ease her pain she would go to secret establishments where people would gamble since gambling was illegal(in this time) and put all her money into the game. She would also drink her sadness away until she couldn’t handle it anymore and every day would come home extremely intoxicated and would physically hurt you multiple times blaming you as you were the reason that your father left. So with time she became an alcoholic and to be able to buy more alcohol she would gamble but always lost her money and because of her addiction she begged gang leaders for money and was in deep debt.

You would starve as your mom didn’t care to feed you, you were filthy as your mom didn’t care to bath you. You were lonely and had no one in the world.

Then one day your mom disappeared, she had abandoned you and you had to learn how to defend yourself. As one day a nun found you in a horrible condition, she took you into the nun convention, where other orphans lived and the nuns would take care of them until they turned 18.

You promised yourself that if you were to ever have children of your own, that you would love them unconditionally and take care of them. To always be there for them unlike your mother who left you to die without remorse.

Your eyes were filled with terror as if seeing a ghost and your body was trembling. Queenie rapidly grabbed your arms and stared right into your eyes

“Y/n breathe, everything will be alright, I’m here remember. If anything happens, I will be by your side”

Your heart began to slow down and you took in some deep breaths. You closed your eyes for a moment as in mentally preparing yourself. Finally you had eased a bit

“I’m fine”

“Are you sure ?” You nodded to Queenie and she loosened her grip on your arms.

You look at your mother who was standing in silence and you give her the most enraged expression that anyone could ever give

“What do you want ?”

She frowns and tries to come closer but you step back. Queenie is at the side being at guard and also giving her a nasty glare.

“Y/n i’m so sorry for leaving when you were just a child, I regret everything I had ever done.”

You felt incredibly enraged and hatred that your face was fuming

“After all these years, you realized all your sins, well there, you can leave now”

You grasped the door about to close it but your mother halted your arms

“No No please! I need your help!”

Queenie tried to take her off you but she was very resistant and kept squirming and begging desperately

Your gaze softened and a frown appeared “I feel pity for you, Father abandoned you because of me but did you ever think that I could have filled that hole in your heart”

Those words cut deeply inside your mother’s heart, and she froze. Lamenting all the time she lost with you, she truly felt sorry and guilty for making you suffer. Knowing that she can never get that time back. She began to sob

“I’m so sorry! I don’t expect you to forgive me- I really need your help”

Queenie has had enough and with all her strength she took her off of you brutally “Get off her! you had said what you needed to say so go!”

“No! if you don’t help me we both will die!” your mother yelled and your eyes widened as well as Queenie’s

“What do you mean?” you ask her worriedly

Your mother appeared to be very terrified and lowered her voice “If you don’t marry the gang leader’s son, the one i’m in debt with. we will both die”

to be continued….

[blueaetherr]

angst w john where he and the reader get into a big fight but it ends kinda cute..🫶🫶

love, my (infrunami)

pairing: john stones x gn!reader [they/them]

warning(s): none

summary: the one where john realises that his lover has been right in front of him this whole time

now playing: infrunami by john stones

He said one wrong thing, and the argument began. He said some things, they said some things, unpleasant and unfiltered words becoming common in the conversation. There was a lot to be said and neither refused to hold back. Then John said it and suddenly, he could only hear himself. It was crazy how fast your choice of words could ruin the relationship.

"I don't think we should be together anymore."

There was a bit of confusion in the room. From Y/N, from John. They waited on him, patiently looking on at John to explain his words but his silence remained as loud as their own.

"Okay then," Y/N bit down on their lip, nodding. "I just don't understand. Where did all of this come from?" They didn't understand where this energy came from, the switch was so sudden. But that was okay. If he no longer liked them like that then they couldn't change how he felt about them. He seemed so certain yet unsure but they wouldn't argue it. They refused to. There was no point in fighting for a one-sided relationship. At least some reasoning and understanding were needed, something to ease the blue heart.

"I... I—I don't know." John couldn't find his words. He had them indeed, in his thoughts and feelings. But he didn't want to say anything out loud. He saw it all and more. The tears threatening to fall, the shaken expression, the nervous ticks. So much pain and sadness and confusion fell on Y/N's shoulders all at once. A heart was breaking because of him—he was essentially a heartbreaker, and he didn't want to add to it. "I'm sorry."

Y/N sniffled as they wiped their nose, exhaling a low breath. "It's okay." Even in heartbreak they were calm and collected in how they felt, something they did to reassure John that they were okay.

And the two went their separate ways, with dignity and respect. Though it didn't feel like it to John. It was hard to not think about them. Remaining friends, he saw Y/N everywhere. They were always there. At his matches, helping him with recovery, crossing paths through mutual friends. After everything that happened, John and Y/N remained friends. It was all love from them to him. They were his friend way before they were his lover.

There was a lot to love about Y/N and John failed to see a lot of that before the relationship even existed. Only did he witness a whole lot of that when the two fell apart.

They were the embodiment of his favourite poems, anything that held words, feelings and thoughts. They personified everything he wanted to feel, the good and the bad of it all, felt alone or together with another. Today, yesterday and tomorrow were his favourite days with them. They got along with everyone around them. John thought Y/N was nothing less than magnificent and amazing and whole. And this was only half of it all. 

When it was John and Y/N, all was complete. He was complete. But when it was simply John, he felt left without, apart. Withdrawn from, lacking in more than less—anything that could be John and Y/N. 

Sitting under the dim lights in his back garden late at night, John turned to Y/N, saying, "I've been thinking—"

"You've been thinking..." Y/N let out a scoff, shaking their head. They let their voice dip as their sight wandered out to the sky. "Sounds just like you." John was always the pensive one in the relationship. Always in his thoughts, in his feelings. Sometimes drifting through the unreal and it became hard to get him back into reality when he was really into it.

"Have you thought about us since we broke up?" He saw the mood visibly fall from Y/N's face but he expected it. With the way the two ended and all the time that has passed, why would Y/N want to talk about it all now?

"And why would I do that?" Y/N cocked their head to the side, eyeing John. "I remember you being so sure that there was nothing left to this relationship." Time had passed since the two broke up and Y/N remained hurt from it all. That didn't mean, though, that they would cling onto John as if everything would fall back into place. How could you wait for someone to come back when they were so sure of never returning? Not because they couldn't, but they simply didn't want to. John made it so clear that he didn't want to return to the relationship.

"I think I was wrong. I know I was wrong, Y/N," John said.

They turned their focus back on John, folding their arms. "Where did this switch come from, John? What changed? Was it me? 'Cause that wasn't my intent." No longer were they heartbroken, but the relationship was still something that they always came back to. What did they do wrong? Why did it really end? John never gave them peace of mind with the way the two ended.

"No, no, no. You didn't, actually." He tried to reach for their hand but they pulled away. He sighed, rubbing his hands over his face. Fair enough, I guess. He removed his hands from his face. "I thought I fell out of us and ending the relationship felt like the right thing to do. And it was but I made you think it was all your fault when really it was all on me, and for that I'm sorry."

"I know I've gotten so much wrong so I'm just trying to make rights here if you would like that." John took in a small breath and let his focus fall solely on Y/N. "I want to start over, Y/N. Make some amends between us, get myself right with you. You might not want to... and that's okay, I'll understand. I get it. But if you ever want to, I'm here."

There was some relief in getting everything off his chest. It might all just backfire yet John was content with getting everything straight, offering some understanding that Y/N should have gotten time ago. He wanted to get another chance with Y/N if they allowed it, of course. If they refused to give him another chance, that would be okay. And if they did then that would also be okay; either choice would be understandable from every single angle of things. 

He knew that maybe he was asking, even begging, a lot from Y/N. To hear him out for his wrongs in the relationship, to forgive him, to start again with a new relationship. But John simply couldn't resist the idea of getting Y/N back. The idea of not even trying pushed him to do the exact opposite. He missed everything about them. That was all he wanted, all of Y/N. In the relationship and the friendship. 

Their smiles, their laughs, their company, their humour, the list was endless with Y/N. And the crazy thing was Y/N was always there; the break-up killed the relationship yet never did they go astray from John. Never was there a mystery in Y/N. They had always been in front of him. The thing was John had been too blind to see all of them for what they were, and that's how the relationship fell off.

But John was ready to build it all up again, if he was given the chance.

His hand was open and ready to take but Y/N took their time, brows pulling together. They were hesitant about this. They were potentially fooling themself, going back to the same person who let their heart turn blue, going back to the person who couldn't organise their thoughts. A change in actions wasn't a guarantee and they knew that well.

But it also wasn't impossible. Y/N never fell out of love with John. In fact, John never fell out of love with Y/N. It was simply a situation of misplaced and unspoken feelings and thoughts. In truth, John and Y/N were inevitable. The two were bound to one another in the name of love that ran very, very deep.

Y/N let their hand slip into his own, fingers interlocking. It was then that they let themself fall into his embrace. John was simply too much comfort for them to pull away. "You know how to say sorry a lot, you know."

[neochan]

GENRE | smut, idolverse!

WARNINGS | smut

WC | 2.6k +

A.N | this is a repost of my older work. i hope you enjoy it <3

You could still hear the unintelligible screaming of thousands of fans as the boys filtered off the stage and into the greenroom. Another successful concert in the long string of tour stops. You couldn’t even remember what state you were in because the days of traveling, unpacking, setting up, and doing it all again the next day ran together.

The boys were dripping sweat, immediately grabbing bottles of water and towels to wipe themselves off. They had worked harder than normal today since during one of the sets the microphone cut out and they had to perform acapella. Someone was getting fired for that.

Taeyong flopped onto the leather couch dominating the center of the room, water in one hand, phone in the other. “People are already uploading photos.” He outstretches his arm so the others could view the pictures pulled up on his screen.

“Johnny you look ridiculous,” you point out, laughing as a fan had caught Johnny in the act of wildly waving his light stick.

“I was having a good time, okay?” He chuckles and walks into the dressing rooms to change out of his stage outfit. Half of the group filtered out to change and half stayed to peruse through the gifts left by venue staff and play on their phones until told otherwise.

You were wondering where Hyuck was when you heard his voice from the hallway. He saunters in and gives you a kiss on the cheek, “Enjoy the show?” His golden skin was tainted pink, hair matted to his forehead by the sweat that was trickling down the side of his face. He grabbed his shirt and lifted it to swipe at his face, revealing his cute tummy. You had to resist the urge to poke it.

“I enjoyed hearing thousands of pretty fans scream your name” You give him a smirk knowing that he hates when you downplay your relationship.

He nudges you with his shoulder, “You know I meant the songs,” his doe eyes look into yours, his long lashes brushing against his cheek when he blinked “Besides, you know I love you and only you.”

Mark began to nervously giggle in the corner while Doyoung made fake gagging noises from the vanity he sat at. “Oh, shut up.” You say, throwing empty water bottles at the two, “And hurry up I wanna go swimming before it gets too late.”

The ride home was peaceful once the swarms of fans cleared a path for the bus. Per the managers request you slouched down in your seat so know one could see you through the window. It didn’t make much sense because the windows were tinted, but Haechan had to argue for his life to allow them to let you tag along on the tour, so you didn’t question them. Once you were on the road, you sat back up and snuggled close to Haechans side. He rested his hand on your thigh, absentmindedly stroking you with his thumb. His head leaned back against the seat, eyes closed, listening to music. It was so loud you could almost make out the words but you didn’t say anything – you let him stay in his post concert utopia for the whole trip.

The hotel was about an hour away from the venue so that no one would find them, and they’d be closer to their next destination. It was nicer than the others because it actually had a pool. You and Haechan made an agreement to go swimming after the concert, and you couldn’t wait. The staff also rented more rooms, so instead of four people to a bed, it was just you and Haechan.

After checking in everyone filtered off to their rooms leaving the both of you to freely do whatever you wanted - within reason of course. You both got changed, your gaze admiring the hard lines of Haechans back. “Don’t stare.” He blushed, wrapping a towel around his upper body.

You pulled on your bikini which made Haechan go silent. You specifically picked this one because it brought out your skin tone well, and cupped your features beautifully. “Now who’s staring?”

It never failed. The butterfly feeling you got in the pit of your stomach when Haechan watched you with loving eyes. You wrapped a towel around your waist, allowing Haechans eyes to roam the tops of your breasts, peeking out from the almost too small bathing suit.

His cheeks turned pink once he noticed he was caught, “Let’s go”.

The hallways were quiet since it was almost midnight, so you wordlessly made your way down the stairs and out into the night air. It had grown considerably cooler than when guys first arrived that morning, but the sky made up for it. Pretty stars pricked the vast expanse of dark blue and black infinity. You could see the moon peaking out from behind a single cloud, casting a shadowed glow on Haechans honey skin.

The gate was closed when you walked up to it so you stopped to read, “Aw man, the pool closed an hour ago,” You set your lips in a pout, “no wonder the lights weren’t on.”

“Hey it’s okay, no lights, no cameras, they probably wont even notice we’re here if we keep quiet.” He moves closer to you, eyebrows raised expectant for an answer.

You hesitated wondering if you really could pull it off, after all you’d been looking forward to this for the whole day, “I don’t wanna get in trouble..”

“You said you wanted to swim and I’m going to make sure that happens,” He gets down on one knee, “step on my leg, I'm gonna help you jump the fence.”

He boots you over, and grabs your arms to help lower you on the other side, but his hand slips and his nails dig into your shoulder. “Ow, fuck.” You wince rubbing the spot he scratched.

“Sorry, sorry” He says giggling, jumping the fence with such quietness and ease that it looked unreal. “Come on, dare you to do a canon ball!?”

He ran ahead throwing his towel on one of the pool chairs and jumping in the water. You cringe away from the loud slap his body hitting the water made. You walk slowly to the chair, deeply inhaling the addictive chlorine scent.

He finally stands up waist deep in the water and pushes his hair back. The blue water reflected against him, making his skin sparkle. “Come into the water y/n” he splashed some water into your general direction, but not enough to touch you.

“Okay, Okay.” You drop the towel and slip into the water. It was cold. Really cold. You gasp and recoil away, but not fast enough, because Haechan has wrapped his arms around you and started carrying you towards the deep end. You struggle a bit in his grip but his arms provide an iron cage that you can’t get out of. “Haechan let me go!”

He presses a warm kiss to the back on your neck but doesn’t comply with your wishes, instead making a curve and bringing you towards the underwater benches. He fixes his hold on you so that now he’s carrying you bridal style. You stare up at him, water droplets falling off his chin. His eyes were already red from the chlorine and you hoped that it cleared up by tomorrow nights concert. His plush lips sat in a pout, strong jaw set. He was so very pretty; and all yours. You smiled to yourself, deciding to keep that image locked away in your memory forever.

Once he gets to the benches he sets you down and glides in beside you. “You know It’s colder than I thought it was going to be.” He lifts a hand and sheepishly rubs the back of heck, “and you look way hotter in that bikini than I thought you would.”

“I don’t know if that’s supposed to be a dig or a compliment.” You scoot closer to him so that your thighs were pressed against each other. Finding his hand underwater, you intertwine your fingers with his own.

“A compliment babe.” He chuckles and slouches in the water so that only his head sat above it. You both sit there for a moment until it becomes too cold to sit still.

“Well I’m going to put it to use and go swim.” You push off from the cement and paddle around. The only way to stay slightly warm was to keep moving. Haechan watched you, eyes crinkled in a smile, bottom lip caught between his teeth. It was fun to watch you play in the water but the bathing suit was making him think of other things you two could be doing.

And that was how it stayed. Haechan watching while you performed for him.

A while had passed, the calm exterior of the pool getting to you, making you drowsy. The cold blue water washed over your hands while you gently skimmed the surface, making your way over to where Haechan was. You hummed a short tune under your breath, trying to keep yourself distracted. it was close to one in the morning now, but Haechan still sat on the bench, slightly shivering from the brisk air, hands gripping his thighs under the water while his mind wandered far away from the present.

“Watcha thinkin’ about” you ask, moving closer to him, hoping to catch some lingering body warmth.

“Fucking you ,” he moved off the seat and dove under the surface, only leaving small ripples in his wake. You stand there for a second wonder how he could be so blunt, so forward in his desires; he was never like this.

He swam a single circle around your body before popping up in front of you, giving you a mini heart attack. He pushes you back against the tiled walls, “I’ve spent the last hour thinking about fucking you. Thinking about how pretty you’d sound.” His head dips down to kiss along your collarbone, and your hands grab the back of neck, holding him there while his tongue sucked bruises into your tender skin. His hands grazed the bare skin of your arms, giving you goosebumps.

He moaned into the side of your neck, biting and sucking away, wanting you to yearn for him like he did for you. He lifted his head so that his mouth hung over yours, his small puffs of breath fanning over your face while he tests the waters. “Can I kiss you?”

Without giving him an answer you pull him closer by the roots of his hair. His kissing was messy and sweet, and while your tongues moved together, his hips began rubbing circles against you, trying to gain some friction in the cool water. Small heavy breaths were the only sound you could hear, aside from the occasional splash as Haechan moved restlessly.

Your hand wandered down his chest and below the surface to where you could feel him straining against his shorts. You began to stroke him over the fabric, his hips pushing against your touch. He broke the kiss to watch as you peeled down the elastic from his hips, his cock freed from the restricting material of his swim shorts. You watched him twitch slightly as the cold water met his length.

“You can’t make any noise.” You place a single finger against his lips.

“No promises.” He whispers, a devilish smirk breaking way on his face. His hands caress you thighs, pushing your bottoms to the side. The cold water hit you, making you gasp and push into Haechan who just whimpers against your touch.

He tried to stay quiet, only soft grunts between gritted teeth and muffled moans as his hips pushed into your own. The water created resistance but it just enhanced how good he was feeling. He hurriedly grabs at your legs, pulling them up so that they sat around his waist. Your back dragged up the tiled walls, scraping your tender skin, but you could only focus on Haechans cock thrusting deeply in and out of you. He stared longingly into your eyes, filling you up completely, wanting to savor the way they fluttered in the back of your head.

“You love the way I fill you up huh?” He groans into your ear, a hand falling forward to grip the cement ledge of the pool.

You couldn’t respond without fear of moaning so you nod your head wildly. He began to bite and suck at your collarbone, pushing you closer to the edge. Looking down he sees your nipples, erect, poking through the wet fabric of your bathing suit. His eyes grow wide, hips stuttering into you. Fuck you were hot.

“Haechannie, I think I’m going to come.” You squeezed your eyes shut trying to focus on the feeling coiling in your stomach.

“Not yet.” He growls, hands moving to pin your wrists against the cement ledge, “Hold it princess, I know you can.” The water began to slosh around faster as Haechan thrusted harder into you. The sound was so loud its no wonder you didn’t hear the keys jangling against the hip of the guard making his way towards you two.

“Hey!,” he shouts running towards you, “The pool is closed! Get out! Are you two-” He didn’t get a chance to finish his sentence as you and Haechan spring up out of fear and take off. It was easy to push yourself up onto the pool deck. The guard made the mistake of following you two and leaving the gate unattended. You and Haechan ran out, giggling, making your way back into the hotel. You didn’t stop until you got into the room and slammed the door behind you.

With your heart hammering in your chest you lean against the dark cherry wood . “Holy fuck we could’ve gotten in serious trouble.” You gasp out, clutching a hand against your wet bathing suit top.

“Babe we’ll be gone by morning, no one is gonna know.” Haechan paces in front of you trying to catch his breath. His shorts hung dangerously low on his hips, it was miracle he got them up in time.

“We’re so banned from this hotel.” A knock on the door makes you jump away from it, the worst of punishment's filling your mind. What were they going to do? They couldn’t arrest you, could they?

Haechan walks forward and turns the knob slowly, revealing a sleepy Doyoung. His oversized t-shirt hung off one shoulder showing off his gaunt collarbone. He was rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“What do you want Doie?” you ask softly.

“How was getting chased by the guard?” he gives a sleepy chuckle, still half in his dreams.

“How did you-,” A look of realization hits Haechan, “You reported us?” He whined, pushing Doyoungs bare shoulder so that he stumbled back.

“Sound travels over water dumbasses and you guys were loud, I was trying to sleep!” Protesting, he pushes Haechans wet shoulder back.

“Well, now we’re going to be twice as loud.” Haechan slams the door in Doyoungs face and grabs you, throwing you on the bed. You give a squeal, and hear Doyoungs fist hit the door.

“I swear I’ll make a noise complaint.” He sounded more irritated than sleepy now.

“Go ahead, you’re just mad I’m getting laid and you aren't.” You playfully slap Haechans arm, but he nips at your hand. The other side of the door grows silent, Doyoung either going to report you two, or going back to his room defeated.

“Shall we pick up where we left off princess?”

[panda-writes-kpop]

Take Me Away (TMA) Chapter 11:

A/N: Another weekday, another chapter of Take Me Away! It feels unreal that we’re slowly approaching the end of the series. Let me know your thoughts on this chapter! 💕

Are you looking for the beginning of the series? Do you need to catch up on a chapter or two? Visit the Series Masterlist for everything Take Me Away related!

TW: Injury, death, blood, the beach, oceans, mentions of alcohol, food, implied head injury and memory loss, wedding anxieties

Yoohyeon lies in her booth with the gunshot wound deeply embedded in her stomach. She knows that she won’t live to see another sunrise, but she wants to make it long enough to see your face again.

“Y/N, darling, I wish I could fix the mistakes I’ve made. I-”

Yoohyeon coughs up a little bit of blood as she holds her bleeding side.

“I can’t hold on much longer, but know that I love and care for you more than anything in the world. You were different from anyone else that I’ve known. You cared about me in every way that you could, and for that, I owe you nothing but my thanks and gratitude.”

~

Blood. All I see around me is a sea of blood.

Is this really the mysterious life force that keeps us alive?

…Or at least it kept me alive.

I should be thankful, at least a little bit, that I got to live.

~

You gasp as you immediately sit up in bed. You rub your forehead after tossing the brooch to the side.

I’ll put it back into the box later, but right now, I need something to drink. I thought about coffee or tea, but is it really too early to drink alcohol?

You gently make your way out of bed while trying to not wake up the dogs. You successfully start and finish your morning routine with no interruptions.

What was the purpose of that life? I met Yoohyeon, we got close and became secret lovers, she cheats on me, and then she dies. Where’s the happy ending there, or do I only get one?

You sigh as you run your fingers through your hair.

And while I’m at it, what’s up with that voice? They’ve been acting awfully suspicious for a while. From bullying me to now being my savior, they’ve definitely had some major character growth. What’s up with them flirting with me while I’m in another world? Don’t they know that I should be focusing on wooing women more than trying to figure out how to deal with them?

You shake your head before opening the door to your room.

Less thinking about that, and more thinking about what I want for breakfast.

Taking a step out of your door nearly causes you to run into one of your maids.

“I’m sorry to bug you, Y/N, but your father has requested for you to join him at the beach today. Well, it was less of a request and more of a demand, but the thought still counts. Be ready in an hour when the car comes to pick you up.”

And with that, the maid leaves the hallway as you closely follow your father’s instructions for today.

~

You let your bare feet touch the sand as you lay underneath the beach umbrella.

I’m too stressed to go for a swim. I might drown if I think about everything and swim at the same time.

You watch as your dad swims in the ocean in front of you. You roll your eyes before looking away.

He’s such a dork, but I wouldn’t change him for the world.

You gaze up at the clear-blue sky that lightens up the world around you.

It’s such a beautiful day. I wonder how the girls would react if I took them here…

SuA would be excited, and I’m sure that she would drag me into the water with her no matter what. Her fierceness and passion would lead to a lot of beach-inspired pranks from her and me.

Siyeon, on the other hand, would lay right here next to me. We’d talk about everything and everything until the sun set. Her smile and laugh would shine brighter than the rays of the sun as we’d joke and flirt like we used to.

Dami would like to take a stroll down the beach. We’d collect different seashells as she talked about her shop or a book she’s recently read. Her eyes wouldn’t leave me as I admired our collection of seashells in my hands.

JiU and I would build a sandcastle together. I’d tell her more stories as she eagerly listened to every single word that I said. She’d make a home for us in the sand; a place where we could go when things were okay again.

Yoohyeon would’ve liked to play beach volleyball. She and I would serve, set, and spike the ball back and forth over the net. One of us would have to lose, and the loser would’ve given lots of kisses and affection to the winner.

As for the other two stones? I’m not one for making predictions, but I think they would like a beach day as well.

“Hey, are you okay, kiddo?”

You jump slightly as your father’s figure looms over you.

“I didn’t mean to give you a heart attack, Y/N. I just wanted to see how you were doing.”

“I’m good, but my mind keeps wandering.” You admit as you make room for your father to sit under the wide umbrella with you.

“What are you worried about? Is it the wedding?” Your father asks, and you nod your head.

“I don’t feel ready yet. I mean, I’m marrying someone I’ll meet a day before the wedding.” You let the words flow out of you as you express your nerves.

“I know, Y/N. Just try to relax, okay? After today, you only have two more days left. The seamstress will be coming tomorrow, so try to act somewhat normal, okay?”

You silently nod again as your father sighs.

“We should be getting back. The sun will set soon, and you need your rest.”

It’s already that late?!?!

“Ah, I see. Thank you for taking me here. I appreciate it.”

You smile at your father as you help him pack everything up.

~

You clutch the rose quartz in your hand as you slide into bed with your pajamas on.

It’s just this stone and then another one. I can do this. I can do this.

Pie and Cherry nuzzle into your left and right side, respectively, as you admire the quartz in your hand.

It’s amazing what a little stone like this can do. I wonder how the magic in this thing works…

You yawn as you feel your brain shut down for the night.

I can think about magic tomorrow; I just need to get through tonight.

~

You feel the sun beat down on your face as you rise from your bed.

Did I forget to shut my curtains? …Wait, this isn’t my room. Where am I exactly?

You’re on a coastal town on an island in the middle of the sea.

Cool, cool. Is that all of the help I get?

If I knew anything else, I would tell you.

Thanks.

Now, look alive. You’re about to meet your love interest in a few minutes.

WHAT?

You quickly maneuver around your small bedroom as you work to clean everything up and get changed. You notice a small rose quartz anklet on your foot, but you’re too worried about impressing someone to take note of it.

Is this a cute outfit? I hope that this is cute.

You look excellent, Y/N. Exit the door as soon as your ready.

You take a deep breath as you exit your room.

“Y/N!” A voice screams before you’re tackled to the floor.

What the-

A red-haired girl laughs as she gives you a warm hug on the floor.

“Hey, why aren’t you hugging me back? You didn’t hit your head that hard, right?”

“I’m sorry.” You mumble before awkwardly wrapping your arms around her too.

“That’s better. You always give me hugs when you wake up. It’s what best friends do!” She gives you a toothy smile before getting up off of the floor.

The girl offers you a hand that you graciously accept before she helps you off of the floor. She guides you into the kitchen as your hands are intertwined together.

Hey, voice person, please explain!

I just wanted to watch you get tackled. That was pretty entertaining.

How rude! I just wanted some help, and now you’re out here trying to get revenge on me.

It was funny, you have to admit that.

Okay, maybe it was a little funny…

That’s good enough for me. As for information, you live with your best friend whom you’ve been crushing on for ages. You got into a bad boating accident that messed with some of your memories.

Thanks. That would’ve been helpful earlier, but thanks anyways.

You let go of the woman’s hand as you sit at a table in the kitchen.

“I made breakfast! Eat up.” The red-head places a plate of food in front of you.

“Thanks!” You cheerfully say before eating the food in front of you.

“Do you remember my name, or do you just remember me?” The girl asks suddenly.

Umm…

You remember her, but not her name.

“I remember you, and living here with you, but I don’t remember your name.” You shyly admit.

“That’s alright!” She gives you a bright smile despite the sadness in her voice. “I’m Gahyeon!”

[caxsthetic]

Never Fine

Miya Osamu x F!Reader

Hurtful Truth: You would never know what you had until you lose them. And once you lost them for good — you could never have them back.

Pt. 3 ⇚ Epilogue ⇛ Suna’s

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *. GRAND MASTERLIST .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You looked radiant, under the bright blue sky as the sun peeked in between the leaves. The smile that adorned your face was one that could make him feel so complete. As if by just having you smile at him, he knew he could take on everything that this world threw in his direction.

"Samu, why did you look so sad?" Your fingers grazed the back of his hand, so delicate. "Something bothering you, love?" Your sharp orbs eyed him with concern. And those looks always made him feel so vulnerable.

It never changed — how your eyes glimmered every time it fell on his figure. The way those warm pupils fell on his face was nothing but warm. Even before he dared to ask you out, even before he slid an engagement ring on your finger, and even after he captured lips that belonged to someone else,

You always had the same loving, gentle gaze.

"It hurts." He choked out, one hand gripping on the bouquet of your favourite flower. "To see you go, it hurts, (Y/n)." His eyes bore into yours, and the way you didn't even look at him with rage like everyone else, was the thing that finally broke him into million little pieces.

"But, Samu." You called out, pulling your hand away that was touching his skin before, making him feel the cold air of December since he left his gloves at home. Your eyes were still the same as it was before, but there was something else lingering there. "You hurt me first."

It was so unreal, to hear your voice whisper in his ear. You felt so close to him as the two of you met each other's eyes. He could hear your words at the back of his mind, and he could feel your touch that always secured his for the last ten years of his life.

Your existence stayed in every fibre of his body, never once left even after he tried to leave you for good. And now, now when you were the one who said the last goodbye — he really wished that he could see you for one last time.

Not just in the framed photograph that would be withered by time.

Crash!

Everyone immediately turned their head in his direction as he dropped the glass of champagne to the ground. One second he was bantering with some old friends, spreading happiness as his lips curled into a smile — and the other second he felt like someone just knocked the air out of his lungs, making his grip on the glass become loose.

The venue was so packed, and the way he could feel dozens of eyes staring at him made the suffocating feelings intensify. His pupils darted to the left and right as he needed to get away from there. He wanted to reach out for his twin brother, he needed the blonde to be there with him.

But the palm that touched his back right now, was so unfamiliar.

"What?!" He shouted and turned his head, meeting a pair of green orbs that had a glimpse of shock inside it. Osamu swallowed a huge lump when he realised he just raised his voice at someone that he was supposed to spend his life with. "S-Sorry, Rin."

The brunette let out a sigh, because he knew that his life thereafter would never be easy. The two of them knew anyway that no matter how much in love they were for each other, no matter how many years went by — the thought of you would always be there, haunting every step that they took.

"If you need some space, the balcony near our parent's table is empty."

His words were enough as Osamu immediately had his face facing the ground, ignoring all the questionable gazes that were being thrown towards him and strode towards the said place.

Rintarou could see the stress inside the greyish orbs, the look that he always saw every now and then from the beginning of their relationship. It was always there every morning the black-haired man woke up next to him. The horror, the guilt, the disgust. It was mixed into one — the look that his fiancé wanted to set for oneself.

As one of the grooms exited the room, he needed to be the one that made sure all the guests still enjoyed the rest of the night. He too, felt nausea for a second ago. But he shrugged it off as he wanted to be selfish for today. Just for today, he wanted to boast to himself that he would hold the name Miya as his last name.

You stole it.

He put all of his own guilt that kept eating him alive as he greeted some of his friends at the back of his head.

You stole him from me, Rinrin.

Grabbing a glass of champagne, he listened in to the conversation, focusing his mind to whatever unfolded in front of his eyes.

How could you do that to me?

But none of the words that slipped from the lips of his friends could penetrate his hearing. He closed his eyes, trying so hard not to let you dominate his mind. Though it was no use, he knew that it was no use. After all, every time he turned his head he could feel your stare at him, the illusion of you that his own mind created.

You were his sister, the angel inside Suna's household. Ever since he was still a little boy, it always felt like you were the older sibling instead of him. You always gave him more chuupet, always made sure that he finished all of his homework, always supporting and pulling his figure into your embrace when he looked tired.

All your life, you gave everything to him. You never asked for anything as you just wanted to make sure that he got the best treatment and had the best life. Since forever, you never demanded anything from him or the world. Then you met the twins, that was the first time you ever asked for something.

"I love him, Rin."

Miya Osamu was probably the only thing in this world that you ever wanted.

"Even more than myself."

Yet he was being greedy, and he took him from you without thinking twice once he had the chance.

He was knocked back to reality when he heard someone screamed. The atmosphere was so serene before, but the music and everything stopped the second a familiar cry could be heard throughout the venue. His heart thumped so fast as he scanned the whole area. He knew who it was, he knew whose voice it belonged to.

Rintarou ran towards his parent's table, and everyone immediately parted so he could be there faster. When his feet finally brought him in front of his mother — the one who just let out a scream of agony — he tried to understand what was happening in front of him.

His father cradled the weeping woman, her hand that adorned with some fine lines was now gripping tight on the suit that her husband wore. He wanted to ask what happened, why his mother that almost never showed any pain was now wailing like she just lost someone important. He wanted to know why Osamu's parents averted his gaze, he wanted to—

A vibrate from his pocket halted his thought. He was sure he kept his phone on silent mode today, except for some friends of his. And he knew too well who was on the list; Osamu, Kita, Komori, his parents, and Atsumu.

Atsumu. The name kept flickered on the screen, and he was hesitant to pick up the call. He was afraid, afraid because he knew how much the blonde setter despised his existence. He could see how his brother-in-law wanted nothing to do with him, so he wondered why would he ruin his day even more by answering it?

But he couldn't stop himself from sliding his finger on the screen and placed the phone next to his ear.

"I hope you and that disgusting scrub burn in hell."

Cheating is a taboo relationship that was made by two people who agreed to get into it, and Osamu understood that what he had with the professional volleyball player could never end up well. Yet he did it anyway, for six months behind your back, and continued the relationship even when he knew that it needed to be stopped.

He did all of that, with another person that he knew was important in your life. Your very own brother — Suna Rintarou.

That time when his twin left him a message in the middle of the wedding, he was so ecstatic. Osamu didn't need his brother to always be there, he was okay in case that the setter missed his wedding. After all, Atsumu valued the friendship that he had with you. So he knew not to expect too much.

But he could still feel the pain that rushed through his blood the second he opened up his phone. He could feel his heart stopped beating for a second there when he read the same text on and on as he wanted to believe that it was just a harmless prank. Though he knew he was just trying to comfort himself.

Last year, in the middle of December, he remembered how you dragged him out to buy some ingredients for Christmas eve. You were in a rush because you said that there was a big sale going on for the fresh ingredients on the market.

He knew all the details, which every second unfolded as you pulled his hand after he was done wearing his coat. You keep rambling, about how many people that the two of you should invite, about from which continent the food that should be made. Every syllable, every line of your face, he replayed everything inside his mind like a broken record.

"Baby!" You screamed out in shock when your eyes darted to his naked hand. "It's winter, why didn't you wear your gloves?!" Your hand immediately engulfed his, lifting it up and letting his palm touch your cheek. "Goodness, Samu. You are freezing."

He couldn't help but let out a small chuckle from how adorable you looked as your face moulded to worry. And right now, he really wondered if you knew what you did to his heart for being such a caring lover since high school — and never once changed.

"I am fine, I am fine." He tried to reassure you by pinching both of your cheeks, making you yelp before a pout appeared on the next second. "I have you, (Y/n)." His voice was low, but loud enough for you to catch it. "And having you was enough, because it already made me feel warm in my heart and soul."

The sentence may have sounded cheeky, like a blatant lie. But at that moment, when the two of you gazed into each other's eyes, everything that was being said was filled with honesty. Your eyes softened, and the way you leaned your face into his palm, made him forget about the coldness that started to numb his fingertips.

"You are stuck with me, you know that, love?" You whispered, kissing each digit as if you tried to transfer the warmth that you had to him. "Every winter, autumn, summer, and fall. Right now and another year to come, I will always be there to accompany you, Samu."

The two of you were trapped in your own world, forgetting the fact that you and him were out in the street with an extreme temperature. You were starstruck — he was too. And there was nothing else that both of you needed, except each other.

"And I can't be more happy to be stuck with someone."

Osamu lost the warmth that had been following him for the past ten years of his life. The second he walked to your brother's apartment and captured that lip, those first few moments started the countdown of the lovely relationship that he shared with you.

He didn't know why he decided that it was alright to cheat on you. You have been nothing but good, nothing but an understanding partner in life. When he told you that it would be hard to live with him as he wanted to start up a business, he thought that maybe you would leave.

But instead of turning your back to him, you engulfed his hand, grazing your lips to his cheek as you whispered all the sweet truths and reassurances. You were not going anywhere. You would be there right beside him, through every failure and hardship.

"Because with you I feel complete." And you proved that to him. "Since I can't imagine myself breathing in this world without you." Yet he was the one — who took that air away from you.

His grey orbs fell on the fresh tombstone that was now covered in snow. Gently, he took some steps forward and knelt in front of it. Setting the flower bouquet down as his hand swept the memorial to read what was written underneath the white blanket.

He didn't have the courage to be here before, to stand here with all of the people that loved and adored you. There were lots of people, all wearing black as hot tears cascaded down their cheeks. Your parents lost a big chunk of their hearts, your coworkers and best friends lost their shoulder to lean on.

And him? He didn't deserve to feel anything since he was the reason you were now lying six feet under.

His breath hitched, hands gripping tight on the tombstone that marked the spot of your final resting place. The emptiness inside his heart, the numbness pounding his brain, the salty tears that flowed from his eyes, the sheer nothingness that now took hold of his soul — threatened to engulf him entirely as he read every word that was carved on the hard surface.

"I will sleep in peace, until you come and wake me up."

It was as if he could hear you whisper in between the cold wind, as if you were there with him.

"Since I shall but love you better, even after death do us part."

With both of your arms wrapped around his torso, to make sure that he would never feel the cold.

He never got to tell you that he loved you one last time. He didn't get to hold you close before you slipped away forever. He never even got to look into your loving, beautiful face which always brought him so much happiness, before you slept for all eternity.

He hadn't been given a chance to tell you —

"It was all a mistake." He whispered, wishing that you heard him. "I love you." Wishing that you could hear the sincerity in his voice right now. "I am sorry. Dear God, I am sorry."

But you were gone, and there was nothing left of you except the framed photograph, staring back into his soul. "For I haven't been the man I promised to be."

You had been his anchor when he started to drift away from his path. You had been there for him through everything, you were always there to make sure that everything went as it was planned. And you were there as his safe haven, the place he would come back to when he sought for love and comfort.

He reminisced the brightness and gentle look of your orbs; the details of your face, he wanted to make sure it would never be gone, like you. And in all of his despair, he pressed his forehead against the cold stone, as close as he could get to you.

"Why are you here?"

Osamu clenched his hand even tighter since he could recognize the voice anywhere. He had lived with the same voice all of his life, one that no matter how many weeks or months didn't see each other, he would always know whose voice it belonged to. "Hey, scrub. I am asking you. Are you deaf or something?"

He took a deep breath, trying so hard not to turn his emotion into rage. You were here, and he didn't want to lose control in front of you.

"I am here to pay a visit." He answered clear and short, standing up and dusting the snow off from his clothes before facing his new company. "I can leave if you want to, Atsumu."

"Oh, so considerate." There was a mocking tone lingering in his voice, yet he shook it off. "Then go away, shoo." The blonde setter ushered him away, with the same rage and disgust visible inside the brown orbs. "A killer isn't supposed to care for their victim."

Osamu had just walked past his twin when the last sentence was thrown, making him halt as he felt wrath bubbling inside his heart. He wanted to scream at the setter, tackle him to the snowy ground as he yelled out that he didn't mean to, that he regretted everything that he had done.

But as he thought of it, that was him right now wasn't he? A killer.

He didn't know why he stayed there, as if he needed to feel the closeness with two important people in his life. Even though it was just physical, he needed it, because God knows when he could bathe himself with both presence — even though one of them was not really here.

"Heard you broke everything off with Sunarin. Guess you could never face their parents, huh?" He was wrecked, torn apart by each word that was being said. "How does it feel, hm? To be the main reason behind someone's death? Thrilling?" Yet he listened to it all, didn't even move an inch from his place.

"I am sorry." He let the words slip. Words he failed to say to you. "I have learned my lesson." So desperate that his voice cracked. "Can I — make it up to you...?"

The low chuckle was enough to be considered as an answer to his question. And with that, he knew that there was no use. That no matter what, he was all alone now. Without a loyal lover to turn to, without a brother to lean on.

"Bring her back to life."

"What?"

"I said it loud and clear." They both turn to each other, meeting the gaze that is filled with one emotion. "Bring. Her. Back. To. Life." Anguish, nothing more than just bitterness and desperation of your existence.

He wanted that too, to hear your voice once again. He wouldn't mind if you pushed him away, he wouldn't mind hearing you curse at him and throw insults at him — he was okay with that, as long as you breathe air and live on.

"Can't do that, right?" The blonde setter chuckled bitterly, shaking his head as if he knew he shouldn't have hope anymore. "Though, I know something that I wanted you to do. This one, I think you can do this."

"What is it?"

"Stop coming to my games." Of course, that was what he wanted. "Want ya to pull off Onigiri Miya from any of the matches that I play." He should have been prepared for such requests. "Cause I want nothing to do with you."

The rage that dripped on every word before, was now replaced with a solemn intonation. Miya Atsumu was tired, tired and stressed because he knew he could never have a relationship with his twin like how everything used to be. "You can do that, right?"

Silence.

"Of course."

There was nothing else that needed to be said, and the two of them understood that well.

Osamu stared at his twin brother as memories replayed at the back of his mind. He brought this upon himself when he decided to betray you, he brought this upon himself when he decided to be a cheater and leave you in the dust without no one else to turn to.

His grey orbs eyed his twin brother who was now kneeling in front of you. The blonde setter dropped a bouquet of baby's breath flowers, kissing the tombstone as he whispered some words under his breath. And because it was so quiet, he could hear every single word that was being said.

"I will always be here, (Y/n)." The voice he used was so soft. "Wait for me, okay?" The voice that he never once used with anyone else. "I love you."

Why?

Why didn't he realise this before?

Why did he never realise that his twin brother loves you the same way as he does?

His mind couldn't function anymore as his pupils widened at the fact. His body was still as if he were bewitched to be rooted at the spot. Even as Atsumu walked past him and ready to leave, he was still there. Too shocked to even register the newly found information into his head.

Now he knew the reason why the blonde setter never wanted to settle down. Now he knew why his twin brother always avoided the topic of love. Now he knew why every time they talked about you, there was always this mysterious look inside those brown eyes that he could not fathom.

And now he knew why Miya Atsumu, the other half of his soul, wanted nothing to do with him anymore.

Because he had taken away not just his own love, but also the love that the blonde setter was supposed to have.

"Hope you can survive the rest of your life, Osamu." The older twin brother turned his face to see the exact copy of him. Someone that he used to trust, someone that he used to love more than himself. "Knowing that you were the main reason our life went like this."

It felt like there was something that clogged his throat at that exact moment. He wanted to call out his twin brother, he wanted to say that he was sorry, that he regretted everything he had done for the last few months.

He wanted to say that he was sorry, for taking away the love of his life too.

Yet he kept his mouth shut as his eyes could only stare at the fleeting figure that started to get smaller, out of his reach. Osamu let the other half of his soul slip between his fingers, just like how he let half of his heart go.

And the two of them — would never come back to his life, no matter how much he wanted them to.

Tagged Lovelies:

@muffins-puffins @quirksandbreaths @vlovers-world @blacckdiamondposts @atsunflower @hihiq @the-fandom-ness @murasakibaraa @verbluehte @simp4tsukkii @ladyalicevii @evermorehaikyuu @clowninfortodoroki @koutaroulovebot @fitriiaw @mistypoison @aquariarose @greenleaf-fantasy @t-amajiki @kuraomi @haikyuuwithadashofart @starbybokuto @shiningstar-byulxx @nerdyphantomlady @raequii @akasuns @sugawsites @macaronnv @spicyfoodboi + @yoitsseulgi @hhwanggu​ 

[wannabemobwife]

Guns, Glamour and Goodfellas - Chapter 16

Chapter 16: Things We Supposedly Lost in the Fire

Dad!Mob!Tom x Mom!Mob!Reader

-Pairings: Tom Holland x Reader, Rosie Holland x Henry Osterfield

-Warnings: Grief, barely suicidal thoughts, fire

-Words: 4K

Author note: Tom and Y/N don’t really age, I think of them as like Barbie and Ken, never aging. Final chapter will be up tonight around 9-10 PM PST. Sorry for the wait, you guys are so patient. Love ya.

Chapter 16: Things We Supposedly Lost in the Fire

Words: 4K

There you were, standing alongside your husband, daughter and friend as the building before your eyes erupted in a blaze. Smashing windows as the remaining members of Wilson’s mob, funneled their way out of the burning warehouse. Coughing up all the inhaled smoke.

One by one, people bursted out of the doors gasping for fresh air. Their lungs constricted from the dark ash that bled through the sky. You just stood there, next to your family, taking in the sight before you. As sirens rang through the air

The smoke and flames kept raging on, but there was still no sign of Parker.

That was 5 days ago. Now, you were in the present, trying to survive. The fire that took 3 days to put out, claimed the lives of your son Parker, Carter Wilson and multiple men.

Everyone was dealing with Parker’s demise differently. Harrison and Henry had so generously offered to stay with all of you for the time being. You took them up on that.

You refused to leave your room for a week, barely acknowledging Tom and Rosie. Tom would try to get some reaction from you, but you would lay there, catatonic. Oblivious to the outside world. Maybe coming down for a cup of coffee but then heading straight up back to your room.

Parker was your baby boy, words couldn’t express how you were feeling. A piece of you was missing.

You would walk down stairs and catch a glimpse of all the photographs perched everywhere, showcasing you, Tom, Rosie and Parker’s greatest moments. Everything reminded you of him.

The car keys flooded back memories of first teaching him how to drive. You were so scared. Every parent feels the same but it is hard to relinquish control of your car and put your life in someone else’s hands. You would flinch anytime he broke a little too hard. Always pushing on your imaginary brake.

“Ok, now put the car in drive. Make sure you keep your foot on the brake.” You began, instructing Parker how to drive.

You thought it be best if Tom taught Rosie and you taught Parker how to drive. You didn’t need twice the amount of heart attacks. “Ok, what next?” Parker asked after shifting from park gear to drive gear. Or so he thought.

“Give it a little gas now.” “Ok….” Parker barely touched the accelerator and the car shot backwards.

“PARKER! AAAAHHHHH!” You screamed as he lost control of the car. He slammed so hard on the brake, sending you flying into the dashboard. Your head knocked into the front, instantly creating a splitting headache.

“Oh, mom are you okay?” Parker questioned, preparing himself for your outburst.

“No, switch seats I’m driving home. That’s enough for today. The problem was you were in reverse and you hit the brake way too hard.” You explained with a calm voice, inside you were seething with anger. Pressing your hand to your head to try and subside your head.

“How did I know R stood for reverse, it could have been the R in drive?” Parker mocked sarcastically. “Honey, I love you but your dad is going to teach you from now on.”

You drove home safely and immediately went to the kitchen for an ice pack. Your head was throbbing. Tom greeted you, he was reading in the living room.

“How did the first lesson go?” Tom asked, noticing the scowl with adorned your face.

“Why don’t you ask Parker?” You snapped, pressing the cool ice pack to the soon to be bump on your head.

“Ok.… Parker any idea what your mom is talking about?” Tom inquired, knowing to not press you with anymore questions.

“I may have gone a little too fast and slammed on the brake,” Parker mumbled

“There’s more to that story,” you barked. Of course Parker was leaving the part of going in reverse instead of drive.

“I may have picked the wrong gear…” Parker divulged.

“HE WAS IN REVERSE!! NOT DRIVE!!” You shouted.

“Oh—“ Tom started to say but was cut off by you again.

“And then when he braked, he stopped so hard my head hit the dashboard.” You explaining, throwing your hands up in fury to point at your head. Tom started to chuckle. He tried to suppress a laugh but you were not having it.

“Are you laughing?” You thundered.

“Umm… no.” Tom’s entire expression totally changed as he saw the daggers you were shooting him.

“Tom, it’s not funny. Our son doesn’t know the difference between drive and reverse.”

“Guys, I’m still right here.” Parker chimed in as you spoke of him as if he wasn’t in the room.

“SAY SOMETHING!” You snapped at Tom’s defeating silence.

“Parker be more careful next time.” Tom explained to Parker.

“That’s it? Seriously?… Next time, you drive with him and you will feel my frustration and pain.” You sighed, giving up on this fight.

Life was so much simpler then, you were just trying to raise two wonderful kids. Helping them along the path of life, but there are always detours. You never expected life to have this many bumps. You especially didn’t expect your son to not live a full life. One full of wonder and joy.

Tom had his own way of mourning. He began to relish in his kills, channeling all his emotion into running the mob. Spending night after night bashing in skulls. Coming home with blood drenched clothes.

You understood everyone worked through their grief differently but his way seemed unhealthy. Tom had a few quarrels with anyone associated with the Wilson mob. He blamed them for the death of Parker.

Tom was currently, in his warehouse torturing some poor sap who was a well known capo of the Wilsons. “Tom, give it up. He’s not going to talk,” Haz told Tom as the continued to torture one of Wilson’s soldiers in front of him.

Carter had died along with Parker in the fire and Tom didn’t really know who the new leader was. All he knew is that he still wanted revenge.

“He’s right, you should just kill me. I know to keep my mouth shut unlike your dead son,” the soldier barked, warranting a swift strike to the jaw.

“Don’t you ever fucking mention him again. Your leader killed him. I should do the same to you to receive a smidge of compensation,” Tom snarled as he wrapped his hands around his throat, cutting off his airway completely.

“Tom, come on. He’s not worth it. Let him go,” Haz pleaded as the man started to turn blue.

“Haz, I can’t. How can I let him walk free, when he is the reason Parker is dead?” Tom explained, loosening his hands.

“That was Carter, not some menial soldier. He probably has a family like you,” Harrison talked Tom down.

“You’re free to go,” Haz concluded as he untied the poor man in front of them. He bolted for the door as quick as possible.

“Haz, I can’t do this. I need Parker here. He was supposed to be doing this. Not me… I feels unreal how much I miss him,” Tom cried.

“I know. We all miss him.”

“I couldn’t even protect my own son. Do you get that? And this can’t be the end. I can’t just move on, knowing I’m supposed to bury him tomorrow,” Tom swore.

“Tom, it will get better,” Harrison consoled him.

“How? I can’t just have an open ended statement. I need a solution. Something to fix this ache in my heart. How can I make this pain go away?” Tom pleaded.

“Tom, there is no answer. You just have to try and work through your grief and eventually move forward.”

“You know, Parker asked me the same thing right after Charlotte died. He needed the pain of her death to be lifted from his shoulders. I told him he needed time, but I lied. I knew he could never move on. That this would stick with him for years to come. That’s how I feel right now. There is no remedy except trying to make those bastards pay. Can you let me do that?” Tom exclaimed.

“Tom, I… yes, I can. Only because I know that is what you need right now. Someone to have your back. And I promise I always will.” Harrison tried to comfort his grieving friend but it was hard. Hard to explain to Tom that it only seemed like his world was ending.

That night Tom came into your shared room looking half dead. He had black eye and bruises that littered all over his body. From that moment you knew you both couldn’t keep living like this. You couldn’t keep shoving down your feelings and refusing to face the world, same with Tom but instead of shutting people out the was instigating fights left and right.

“Tom, I need to talk to you,” you sighed as Tom entered the room

“Yes, baby. Anything. I’m just happy to hear your voice,” Tom replied, surprised you were speaking to him. This was his first verbal conversation with you in days.

“We need to make a change, we can’t keep living like this. It isn’t healthy,” you began but was faced with a heart broken Tom.

“Y/N, don’t say that please,” Tom pleaded.

“Tom, we aren’t moving forward. We’re stuck.”

“No, Y/N we can move on from this. Please don’t leave me.”

“What? Tom, I would never. I need you more than you need me,” you questioned.

“Seriously doubt that. Baby please don’t scare me like that again. If I don’t have you. I don’t have anything,” Tom whispered as he came to your side, wrapping his arms around you.

“Tom, you’ll always have me. But what I was meaning to talk about is, I think you need to step away from the mob for a while. You aren’t dealing with losing Parker healthily. Killing people for sport doesn’t help process your pain.” You said, trying to fight back the tears.

“Y/N, I’m not ready to accept it. He can’t be gone. Our son can’t be gone,” Tom cried out.

“Tom, I’ve been feeling the same way. Instead of working through our grief together, we’ve been fighting our own battles and it is doing more damage than good. I’m drowning here, I need you. I need you next to my side to help me through this because I wake up most mornings and have thoughts that I should never think about. Like I don’t want to live this life anymore or live at all.”

“Love, I didn’t know. Y/N, I don’t ever want you feeling that way.”

“I know but I don’t want to feel this way either. We need to get away. Eventually far from the mob, maybe travel like you always wanted to,” you sniffled, wiping away tears.

“Y/N, you know I want that but, I can’t just leave. Our life is here,” Tom explained.

“I’m not saying now. But I can’t live out my days in this house, all I see is him and everything that we’ve lost. I can’t do it anymore. It’s killing me. Don’t you see that? I need to know that we will have our happy ending somewhere other than here. Once Rosie has graduated. In three years, we leave. Please give me that, you pleaded.

“Y/N, I promise. In 3 years we can start our happily ever after.” Tom agreed. You finally had a date in mind. You needed to find happiness somewhere else that wasn’t tainted with Parker’s memory.

Everyone was suffering, Rosie however was very good at hiding it. She was the rock when Parker passed. She knew if the roles were reversed, Parker would be there for everyone.

She threw herself in the mob and other aspects, refusing to let herself break down like the rest of her family. She was mostly consoling Henry. Henry had a hard time adjusting to life without his best friend. He tried to be strong for Rosie but nights she would find him crying himself to sleep.

“Are you coming to bed?” Rosie asked as Henry was held up in living room.

“I don’t think so just yet, I have to finish this,” Henry sighed in frustration, while lounging on the couch.

“What is it?” Rosie asked, coming over to snuggle with him.

“Parker’s eulogy. Did you finish your’s?”

“Umm, yeah I did.” Rosie responded, in reality she hadn’t even thought about it. Planning on making it up as she went tomorrow.

“It’s just killing me. To actually think of him as gone, especially because of tomorrow. I’m not ready to say goodbye,” Henry cried, trying to fight back tears.

“I know. I miss him too,” Rosie responded. Henry started breaking into a fit of sobs and Rosie moved to comfort him. “It’s okay, I’m here.”

“Why are you not sadder? I haven’t once seen you break down, like everyone else,” Henry sniffled.

“I don’t know, maybe I just went through the stages of grief quicker. I’ve already accepted it.”

“Ok well, glad you aren’t as sad as me. Then we would have two blubbering messes. I know this probably a huge turn off,” Henry muttered, stopping to blow his nose. She chuckled in response but Rosie knew something was off. She shed a few tears looking at the building blazing that night but she hadn’t cried since.

Quickly changing the subject to not seem like a heartless wrench she asked. “What are you writing about? Can I have a sneak peek?”

“That’s the hard part, I was trying to think of a story about Parker and I’s friendship but I keep coming up blank. Either he wasn’t actually my best friend or I’ve just repressed all memories about him.”

“Oh baby—,“

“It’s ok. I’m okay.… I’m sorry Roo, but could you help me?”

“Of course, what do you have so far?” “I have the title “Parker’s eulogy,” and that’s it,” Henry said, reading off the words written on the paper he had been staring at for an hour.

“Oh okay, well. Maybe you should talk about a funny story between the two of you.”

“Ok, I have one. Once upon a time…”

“Henry, you can’t start a eulogy with once upon a time.”

“You didn’t let me finish, once upon a time I met this boy and he had the most adorable, and at the same time, beautiful sister. She is so perfect in so many ways. I grew hopelessly in love with her. To this day I still am.”

“Aww, as much as I love that story it barely mentions Parker.”

“Roo, it’s too hard. I can’t sit here and reminisce all the times we spent together. I can’t write down stories that I’ve already lived. I can’t tell them to others and start referring to him as a ‘was’ and not a ‘is’. I’m not capable of telling the story of how one year where both our families went skiing, Parker and I snuck on a black diamond slope without permission and both ended up with a broken leg. Or the story of how I knew Parker and I would be best friends forever, I shouldn’t be the only one telling it, he should be here too. It’s not fair. Why could’ve it been me?”

“Henry, don’t say that. I don’t know what I’d do without you. But that seems like a good anecdote, write about that.”

“Rosie, you don’t get it. I can’t, I physically can’t do it… I’m sorry but I don’t understand why you aren’t sad. It’s weird. My best friend is dead and the weird part is that HE WAS YOUR BROTHER and you don’t even seem the least bit bothered by it,” Henry thundered, his sad voice morphing into an accusatory one. “Sorry, I was just trying to help…. I’ll see you tomorrow, night.” Rosie finished quickly excusing herself without so much as a goodnight kiss. She knew Henry was going through something but he didn’t have to take it out on her. She quickly made her way to bed and waited for the next day to come.

The day no one was actually prepared for.

The day of Parker’s funeral. Everyone’s final goodbye to your son.

Everyone managed to dress appropriately, in all black to symbolize your mourning. The day however was rather beautiful, a bright blue streaked across ever corner of the sky. Not a single cloud in sight, which was near impossible thing in London. Parker would’ve loved a day like this. For one he wouldn’t be at a funeral, especially not his own. He would be at the beach or going for a bike ride under the gorgeous sun.

The weather kind of taunted you. How dare the day be beautiful the day you bury your son. You knew it was silly but it felt like a cosmic joke of some sorts.

People started gathering at the cemetery. Nikki, Dom, Harry, Sam and Paddy were already there to help you and everyone else get through that day.

Nikki was mostly concerned with helping Rosie. She knew you had been a little checked out lately, no fault of your own, you were grieving. Nikki just wanted to make sure Rosie was dealing with her emotions, not shoving them aside.

“Rosie, I understand if the eulogy will be too hard. I can read it for you,” Nikki offered, catching a glance of Rosie going over he eulogy underneath a tree. “No, it’s ok. I should be the one to do it,” Rosie exclaimed.

“Parker would understand. All your emotions couldn’t be more valid. Have you allowed yourself to cry over him yet?” “Don’t worry I did. Odd question though, thought you’d be wanting me to be strong. I have been for everyone else.” “Rosie, you don’t have to with me. I’m here for you, flower.”

“I’m fine grandma, I should check on mom.”

“It’s okay, I’ll send Harry,” Nikki concluded, grabbing her phone to shoot Harry a text.

“Mom, I gonna get Y/N to eat something” Harry said, calling out to Nikki.

“Really, how?” “I came prepared. Granted it is only chocolate but baby steps. How’s Rosie? Is she freaking out about the eulogy?”

“She says she can handle it. I believe her. I just don’t know where that girl got all her strength. Certainly not from us.”

“I have a clue…” Harry explained, his eyes wandering to you sitting in the front row.

“Come on, the proceedings are about to start.” Nikki said, pulling her son to meet everyone else, atop the small hill.

The person officiating the ceremony was standing behind a chestnut colored casket, about to be lowered into the ground. There were 3 chairs, for you, Tom, and Rosie. Everyone else stood as they witnessed Parker be lowered into his final resting place.

Tears manage to fall throughout the entire day, but they came more frequently as Rosie stood up to deliver her eulogy. Rosie somberly walked near the casket, passing the dozens of roses on top. She was clutching to her note cards, her guideline to the hardest goodbye ever.

“My brother was the greatest person I ever knew. He had already dealt with so much loss, it is unfair that we are gathered here today to mourn him. I’ve been trying to think of what to say, maybe an amusing anecdote or embarrassing story. Maybe one where he demonstrated bravery. But I think I’ll just say what all of us having been thinking. It feels unreal that he is gone. He was my twin and I can honestly say not having him beside me, feels like a piece of me is missing.” Rosie began, fighting back the urge to cry.

“He would always manage to bring a smile to my face even the darkest of times. I’ve celebrated every birthday with him, every school event, my entire life with him. We were supposed to be the same age till the end of time together. I miss him more than I can bare but we have a chance to honor him and not mourn, it is what he would have wanted. My brother was always there for me, especially at my weakest. From carrying me into the house after I fell on my tricycle and skinned my knee to comforting me with cupcakes and ice cream after a break up. We all need that person in our lives. And Parker was my anchor, my savior and my best friend. If you have that person now, please give them a reminder of how much you love them. Parker and I both know I should I’ve said more often, he the same. I’m sorry P. And with this flower, I finally say goodbye to my guide post, my better half, my brother. We will always miss you.” Rosie finished and quickly wiped the tears that had fallen with the back of her hand.

She glanced over at you, bailing into Tom’s shoulder. Her words moved you to a whole other level of grief. This whole time you had been grieving for yourself. It’s not selfish, but you realized just how bad everyone else was hurting.

After the funeral, everyone made it back to the manor for the reception. Hors d’oeuvres made their way around to guests, conveniently managing to skip you. Harry was still getting on your nerves, hoping you’d eat something.

Harry would constantly bring food beneath your nose, waving an assortment of healthy snacks and candy in front of your face. He was determined to get you to eat something even if chocolate melted in his suit pockets.

“Hey, Y/N/N. How are you holding up?” Harry asked, finding you staring blankly into space. “I’ve definitely been better,” you responded, chuckling at your current state.

“Y/N, can you please eat something?” Harry asked, shoved food in your face. “I’m fine, thank you though,” you blatantly stated, probably for the tenth time.

“Come on, I have your favorite,” Harry smirked. “You have MnM’s?” you quipped, your ears perking up.

“Yes…”

“Ok give them to me.” You nearly lunged to grab the bag from his hands. In truth you had been starving yourself, you were hungry but couldn’t find the will to eat. Sweets were sure better than the fancy finger food your cook was serving.

Everyone else seemed to be within their own world. Tom had immediately gone back to talking shop, more like who are we gonna kill next week. People seemed to disappear, one in particular, Rosie. You asked Henry, to try and find her. He scoured the house in search of her and eventually found her in Parker’s room. For days the door had been locked, no one wanted to confront the reality of his bed not being slept in or his clothes not worn. It would reaffirm that he is gone and it was going to take a long time to heal.

“Rosie? You in here?” Henry whispered, knocking softly on the door. It creaked opener evening a distraught Rosie, crying on her bed.

Tears streamed down her face as she croaked out, “Hi.”

“Oh, Rosie,” Henry consoled as he moved to embrace her. She broke into a fit of sobs.

“He’s gone. He said he was right behind me,” Rosie looked up, with puffy red eyes.

“Shhh, it’s ok. I’m here,” Henry said, moving to bring her in his arms.

“I should’ve never left him behind. I keep blaming myself. If I never left him, he would still be here.”

“Roo, baby. You can’t do that.”

“I know, I know but I can’t do this. I’m not ready for him to be gone,” Rosie cried, into Henry’s suit. Tears never bothered to stop coming. She completely broke with him, all the pain and grief she had been hiding was now in the spotlight. Rosie wasn’t ready for a goodbye, none of you were.

Everyone eventually came to the same conclusion, that all the scars in your heart will heal with time. Even though the sadness never fades, you learn to grow with it.

Guns, Glamour and Goodfellas Masterlist

Taglist: @dummiesshort @thenoddingbunny-blog @adriannauni @allthisfortommy @bi-lmg @quaksonhehe @housepartyprotocol

[dracosaurusrex]

Chasing His Sun

Part 4 to Notebook!

Summary: Where Y/N tries to take her mind off of a certain Slytherin, only to have it backfire.

Pairing: Draco x Gryffindor!reader

A/N: Doesn’t a day spent in Hogsmeade sound fun? I got cravings for chocolate while writing this. Honestly tho, I threw up this entire chapter. I certainly hope you enjoy it, pero lyke I’m just going to let my imagination roam free at this point. I would really appreciate your feedback!! <3

Your eyes opened upon the feeling of sunlight hitting your face. Hints of orange and yellow that scattered through a blanketed, cloudy sky indicated to you that it was still early. You took in the peace that emitted through the sounds of birds chirping and felt at ease. It was a beautiful Saturday morning. You looked around your room, feeling groggy, as you recalled the incident that occured the night before. Piercing eyes, a teasing smile--a blush rose to your face as the embarrassment filled you up once again. You had no time to process what happened, because as soon as you met your bed, you knocked out. With the scenario now settling in, all you wanted to do was bury yourself in your grave.

‘The notebook. Oh shoot. Where’s the notebook?’ Your eyes widened when you realized that you had fallen asleep with it in your grasp, out in the open, where Hermione and Ginny could see it easily. With your heart racing and hands moving in a panic, you frantically shot up from your sheets, hoping that you haven’t been caught. You locate the notebook under your pillow and release a huge breath of relief as you hold it near to your chest. Not wanting to suffer another scare, you placed it into your bag.

“Y/N, are you up already?” Hermione asks. She must’ve woken up from the commotion that you just caused. Sleep was still visible from her eyes.

You chuckled nervously, “Yes I am. It’s a beautiful morning and I can’t seem to go back to sleep.” 

“We’re going to Hogsmeade today…” She starts off, “Would you like to join us? We leave at 10.” She lifts herself slightly from her bed to look at you with eyes half opened.

“Yea, I’d love to. I need to pick up a few things also.” You reply. In response, she gives you a tired thumbs up and drops herself back into her pillow.

Since there wasn’t much sleep left inside of you, you decided to get ready. The cold air from your window prompted you to bundle up. As you dress into something comfortable, your mind drifts back to the incident with Draco. Warmth took over after remembering what he had said in response to your little incantations.

‘Why did he say that?’ Yesterday was a whirlwind for your heart. How was it possible to keep your emotions in check when everything that happened gave you sparks of hope and longing? You thought back to potions, to the notebook, and to the encounter. There was no way, right? Would a guy, who held much pride for his house, develop feelings for a random girl in Gryffindor? You weren’t sure. Your heart leaned toward that possibility, but your mind wanted to set itself on the opposing side. All you knew now was that you had to avoid him at all costs. 

You glanced up at the clock hanging on the wall. It was now 8:30AM, and your two roommates were beginning to stir from their sleep. Having been done preparing for about ten minutes now, you decide to gather your things and pick up breakfast, ready to start the day ahead of you.

--------------------------------------------------

You, Hermione, and Ginny stepped foot into Hogsmeade. Despite the grey clouds that covered the skies, you took delight in the small peaks of sunshine, which was joint with the cool breezes that blew through your hair. The cold, although nipping on your nose, evoked a warm feeling in your chest. Autumn was the best season.

The small town was filled with numerous shops. It wasn’t as plentiful as Diagon Alley, but its coziness added to its charm. You followed your friends as they explored Zonko’s Joke Shop and Honeydukes. The prior was too loud for your taste, so you opted to wait outside for the two girls. However, time spent in latter was always good fun. You admired the confections from the window, and excitedly went inside. The sweet aromas that flitted the shop draw a memory from the back of your mind.

In connection to the interactions that you had with Draco the day before, you can’t help but recall the first time you ever had a real conversation with him. How his affections caught you off guard. How it caused your heart rate to speed up numerously within one sitting. How you realized that he wasn’t as bad as others make him out to be. He was actually quite sweet in contrast to his typical personality. There weren’t chocolate chip cookies available in Honeydukes, but the goods made you think of him with much fondness as the coziness that you initially felt in your heart spread even more. 

You examined the sweets that were arranged neatly on their respective racks, picking out several bags of chocolate frogs in contentment. ‘I wonder if Draco likes chocolate frogs.’ you thought. After scanning the shelves for a few more minutes, you came across peppermint toads. ‘Draco, oddly enough, smells like mint. His behavior also reminds me of a toad.’ You laugh at the thought and keep an inward smile stuck to your face. He wasn’t around you, yet the thought of him weighed a huge deal in your heart. Not that you didn’t mind it. 

You added the packs of toads into your little basket. ‘Maybe he’d like some too.’ You thought. 

Happy with your selections, you bounded to the front counter to pay. You weren’t aware of how much time you spent in the store, because you totally lost track of Hermione and Ginny. They were nowhere in sight, and now you were left alone. You stashed your purchases in your bag and waved the shop owner goodbye. Once you stepped outside of the shop you scouted out for your friends. You stared at your surroundings with your eyebrows furrowed, only to have your attention to be stolen by the sound of a very shrill laughter. 

Off in a distance, you see a mop of platinum blonde hair. Draco stood with his hands wrapped around his waist. He sported a sleek outfit, clad in black, which was emphasized by the rings that adorned his fingers. The cold air made the flush of red more apparent on his cheeks. Furthermore, the way his laughter escaped his lips gave life to the butterflies in your stomach. You made it firm to yourself that you were trying to avoid him, and yet the universe decided against that. 

Draco felt your eyes burrow into the back of his head, causing him to turn to your direction. He had stopped laughing at this point when you came into his sight. The way the sun seemed to act as a spot light to you caused his heart to flutter. You weren’t even dressed in clothes that would be considered eye-catching, but to him, you were just that: The apple of his eye. He remembered the way you called his name, how you emphasized every syllable. Your voice seemed to give his name meaning and it made him genuinely happy.

You on the other hand still couldn’t bear the thought of him catching you swooning over his name. It was embarrassing to have been caught in your own feels--a moment that was only meant for you. You broke off the eye contact that was held between the both of you and walked in the other direction. Hoping that he wouldn’t attempt to follow you, you made your way to Scrivenshaft’s Quill Shop, your ultimate favorite.

Draco’s line of sight followed you. He was driven by the thought of seeing you again. The way the sun hit you, the way you smiled warmly at him, the image of you so focused and wrapped up in your own affairs elicited such a huge surplus of emotions from him. You didn’t have to do much to get his attention. He was extremely enamored by the thought of you.

“Hey you guys. I have to run some errands. I’ll go meet you at Three Broomsticks.” He announced.

“Let me go with you!” Exclaimed an excited Pansy.

Draco sternly gazed at her, “No. I want to be left alone.” Coldness was laced within his words with efforts of pushing her away. It worked as she was seen dejectedly turning to Crabbe, Goyle, and Blaise. The boy continued to make his way through a crowd of people, his head turning from side to side with hopes to catch you alone once again. He peered carefully into a number of stores, often throwing a second glance just to make sure he didn’t miss you. His heart was beginning to pick up its pace as his concentration solely focused on finding you.

As if the sun was listening to his thoughts, light was casted to your figure in the small stationary shop the same way it had the first time you spoke in the library. Draco stopped dead in his tracks, breath hitched once he saw you. He couldn’t describe the reason why you made him feel the way he did. You looked so unreal. You seemed so unreal. You weren’t even aware of how beautiful you looked at this very moment, and you didn’t even need to make an effort to do so. 

From the very first moment you shared up until now, interactions were limited and minimal, but Draco couldn’t deny the pull no matter how much he tried. The image of you smiling under the sun was something he knew he wanted in his life. If the ambitious traits of Slytherin took form, it would embody this very moment: Not wanting to lose you again, he stepped forth into the shop.

He delicately pushed the door forward. The shop itself was quite inside and smelled of parchment and old books. He didn’t want to catch your attention right away, so he roamed through the aisles quietly, keeping close sight of you. You were excitedly examining quills on display, testing them out with a satisfied expression on your face. You thought it might’ve been weird to others, but you absolutely loved stationary.

Draco witnessed as your eyes glimmered at the sight of shelves filled with journals that resembled his. They were neatly arranged by color, starting from shades of reds and blues on the bottom shelves, and greens and yellows on the top. You ran your fingers across the spines, and stopped once you were met with the green journals. The top shelves were a little bit beyond your reach, requiring you to step on your tiptoes in order to snag one. Proving to have a tough time, you placed your items on the side so that you’d have more access. However, the struggle to obtain a green journal remained. Your body was stretched, your arms were extended to its full length, and your calves were starting to burn. Having enough of a delight in seeing your effort, Draco quietly made his way to you without you noticing. 

Your focus was still extremely concentrated on the object until it was broken by the feeling of a warm breath hitting the back of your neck. Your eyes widened. You saw a black arm extend from behind you, grabbing the green notebook with ease. Startled, you jolt backwards, hitting Draco’s chest with your back. As you turned to see who your mystery helper was, a free hand held your arm, stabilizing you and preventing you from falling over.  Your eyes were met with Draco’s silvery orbs, the distance between your bodies was minimal. His gaze was intense, and it excited you inside. Suddenly, a child came passing through the aisles, causing you to push your back against the shelf and enclosing you between Draco’s arms.

Realizing the position you were in, you couldn’t help but draw your stare away from his eyes. The closeness made it all the more intimate, and a blush threatened to grace your face. Hearts were racing at a hundred miles per hour at this point.

You heard Draco curse under his breath, “Idiotic child.”  

You chuckled, still trapped against the wall. The sound of your laughter garnered the attention of the boy as he turned his head to your direction. You didn’t realize how tall he was until this moment. You looked up, sucking your lips in to hide the smile that had already formed.

You grinned at him, “Nice seeing you here, Malfoy.” 

Draco cleared his throat and straightened his posture. After taking a good look at your small figure beneath him, he spoke, “Pleasure’s all mine, darling.” His face was graced with a smirk. You felt heat rise within you as the unfamiliar nickname--that directed towards you--rolled off his tongue.

“Is this the journal you were looking for? It looks awfully similar to mine.” With a huff, you tried reaching out for it, only for it to be raised well above your head. 

“Damn you and your long arms!” He only laughed. You tried to create a mad expression, but you couldn’t hide your smile. Draco’s actions kept taunting you as you jumped desperately to take the notebook out of his grasp. 

“What do you want from me!?” Your blush was already so apparent, and your hair was disheveled.

“‘What do I want?’ You ask?” Draco stopped moving and dropped his arms to his sides. Noticing how some hair strands covered your face, he reached out to you and pulled them behind your ear. Your eyes followed his movements and went back to his face. His expression turned serious as he handed the notebook to you. He began to scan your face before leaning into you. You subconsciously pressed yourself further into the shelf. You could feel his breath tease your ear.

He whispered, “Spend this day with me.” 

You were so flustered at this point, you didn’t even bother to say no. The intention of avoiding him was thrown out the window as your attempts to do so were ultimately deemed futile. The effect this boy had on you was indescribable.

Draco bent down to your level and smirked, “I’ll wait for you outside.”

A/N: I’m really grateful for all the support you all have given me! Seeing you all happy makes me happy also. I hope you have a great day!

PS. Feel free to talk to me! With that being said, should I open up requests?

Taglist: @m-winchester-67 @bbeauttyybbx @un-limit-edd @poetontheblock @tttyrus @stretchyice  @vaeonshi

Here’s Part 3!

[oh-for-fic-sake]

The Stand In Chapter Two

Masterlist

Your finally about to film your first scene for a teaser and things have just became real but how are you going to get through make up along side Henry for hours without fangirling? especially when he keeps staring at you like that?

Warnings: Swearing, fluff

A/n: so got a few people that like this idea which really shocked me. I'm trying really hard to make y/n one of us fangirls I really want you to be able to put yourself in this one. Like seriously if I had the chance to meet him I'd just fucking freeze on the spot go red scream and melt into a puddle of goo... I'd be way to anxious to approach him or ask for a photo..Any who enjoy this next chapter xxx

Taglist: @dark-night-sky-99​ @thummbelina​ @sofiebstar​

You yawned loudly as you trudged out of your new comfy trailer: which was actually one of those fancy ass tour buses. You grabbed your bag with a few bits in it...Phone, snacks, purse, snacks, script, snacks....more snacks. What?You got hungry!You opened the door wrapping your cardigan around you tightly as you ventured out into the dark it was freezing the cold air making you shiver. A four am start was always a shock to the system and today was your fifth, your alarms on your phone had gone of again and again and again, blaring and screaming at you. Since the whole becoming and actress and Lauren pulling a contract seemingly out of her ass thing had happened a few days ago, you hadn't seen much of Henry and Joey they had been busy filming and training.

You were slightly smaller then 'she who shall not be named coughDickcough' so some of the fight scenes had to be reworked...Yes at some point you and 'Geralt' were going to come to blows in a fight scene and you were bricking it. For more then one reason;

One. I mean come on the huge hunk of a man; the star of every single late night fantasy you've pretty much ever had!, tossing you around and possibly pinning you down? Grunting and growling the entire time? and your supposed to look angry? Hahaha no...

And two. Well Henry is a large imposing man and Geralt is supposed to be frightening in those scenes so...How the fuck are you gonna stay in character and fight him when your simultaneously scared shitless , remembering choreography and creaming your panties....Like fuck that's gonna be some crazy self control needed right there. If you get through it with out fangirling; which would be a miracle in itself you deserve a fucking Oscar. But that's a problem for another day...Tomorrow in fact. The point is you felt a little bad because he had worked so hard before and now he has to relearn it all and he has been working super hard on it..you don't want to mess up.

But that’s not to say you have been idle oh no! You'd been hard at work learning lines and undergoing your transformation from y/n into Keira which was completely insane. Once fully kitted out you would be....Well not you...But it was you, a super weird experience you were sure but you was looking forward to it all coming together. You had to wear a wig, your hair was just a little to short naturally skimming your shoulders. You were glad really you loved your lilac hair it took a lot of work to keep up with it!.

The wig was a bright blonde not as bright as Freya's hair for Ciri but still quite light, more golden then pale it was a strange color, hard to describe. The wig itself fell down to just past your shoulders in large loose silky waves and even though you had green eyes you were still going to get contacts, it had been mentioned that they want your eyes to be an impossible bright green, all the mages seemed to have bright eyes and you were no different. You were dreading it , you'd never wore them and have a thing about eyes...You don't like touching them or other people touching them eyes aren't meant to be fiddled with you know? ...You need them to see kind of?

Apart from that things had gone well the dresses just needed to be taken up a few inches and the rest of the transformation was mostly attitude , props and make up thankfully the make up was mostly highlights and color correcting that sort of thing. You walked across the set following the light emitting from the hair and make up trailer, you could see from here a few people were up and about inside. Within a few moments you were inside standing off to the side unsure where to put yourself or your bag ,it was just you and a few of the make up artists there. Holly was in charge of you, you got on well with her helping her out a lot before all this and was glad to have her as your artist she put you at ease which is definitely what you needed ,she came over smiling and directed you to your seat.

"So! Todays the day huh? Your first shoot you excited?" You gave a nervous laugh.

"Terrified more like, Its not long apparently they need a teaser for the character to go out and to stick in the trailer....I'm so fucking out of my depth it is unreal! Each day has been a whirlwind and I still don't know if I can pull this off...I'm not an actress" she stood behind you combing your hair back looking at you in the mirror fixing you with a look and struck your crown with the flat of the comb.

"Hey enough of that, you got this just go out there and give it your best. Joey was actually stunned when you did your reading he said he has never seen an actress like you before" you frowned looking around at her slightly twisting in your seat.

"Probably hasn't seen one like me cos I'm not and actress but okay I will bite..What exactly did he say?" She blinked at you leaning back waving the comb about shocked looking for words.

"You-hah? I don't even, you really don't even know how big a deal this is do you?" You blinked shaking your head as she was caught up in her own shock.

"Err no duh? Not an actress remember" you huffed she pointed the lethal comb to your face and make a circle motion she chuckled when you flinched and spun round twisting to face the mirror again.

"Talent. He and Henry were talking about you the other day, they couldn't believe that someone with talent like yours hadn't been picked up on. Apparently the way you just...Turned off your own personality shut down your personal feelings like that and became Keira so effortlessly is rare... Said it was like flipping a switch. A complete personality change like that with no prior training or mentoring is the holy grail. Untapped talent I think was the term used. Henry said he has only seen it twice before and that is saying something with everything he has under his belt... So trust me when I say your going to do great" you flushed they thought it was that good? Henry though you had talent.. you smiled feeling giddy blushing a little.You watched as she moved getting some leave in conditioner to make your hair behave itself.

"It's...It can't be that rare it just comes from having to hide anxiety...Can't let people know your having a meltdown...That’s all I was doing hiding a fucking anxiety attack!" She scoffed running a comb through your hair making sure the product was evenly spread through the strands preparing to split it into two plaits to hide under the wig.

"Babe I saw the video there was more going on there..Perhaps you should watch it and see for yourself It really was like watching someone flip a switch" You shook your head slightly resulting in having the comb waked across it again making you flinch

"Stay still! Its bad enough that you fucking washed it! I can't plait it if your moving!" You sat straight

"SoRrY MoThEr-ouch fuck not with the brush!!" She smirked and carried on plaiting the strands neatly.

"Did you bring your lines to practice?" You went to nod but stopped when she sighed tugging on your hair a little keeping the plait tight to your head.

"Yes I did thought I could get some last minute reading...I think I've got them all down tho" she nodded

"That’s good because your wig is a little late, they are dying it again...Apparently yellow blonde isn't right for your skin so your getting a white silvery ash blond now...A muted tone they said. Think its basically going to be a super light blonde with a lilac or blue tint, fucking wish they would hurry up and choose I need to settle on your face tones! Any who it should be here in about an hour" you whined

"I could have had an extra hour in bed?! Why wasn't I told!? You know your job would be a lot easier if I had beauty sleep!" She laughed loudly tying your first plait off with an elastic before starting the other one.

"I'm sure it would but you do know this is like a late start? Some of the scenes your booked in here for one and two o'clock in the morning~" she through her head back laughing at your pout.You stayed in the make up trailer for a while and Holly had called over to wardrobe about the delay so,thankfully your costume was going to be delivered over here which was less running about for you. So here you were in hot seat waiting ,there wasn't much you or Holly could do at this point but wait.  She couldn't work on your face until she had the the wig on you for color reference. She had left a few moments ago promising a coffee on her return.

You hummed scrolling through your phone messaging your eldest brother and Mother who you had let slip to about your new drastic career change. they were trying to calm you down, knowing you well enough that you was getting yourself into wound up ball of anxiety and panic. You were so engrossed in your phone you didn't notice a certain bear trot in to the room until you had a huge snoot wedged under your phone trying to nudge your hands for some love. You jumped so on edge you yelled out as you was touched.

"OH FUCK WHAT IS-OOOH well hello there~" you looked around quickly then seeing you was still alone you decided to indulge and immediately placed your phone on the table in front of you and leaned back looking between your legs going gaga over the handsome boy. Kal was sitting looking up at you smiling panting away as you petted him on auto pilot. You blinked it took everything you had not to squee out loud somehow managing to keep it inside 'OH MY FUCK KAL! I'm like petting THE Bear... Wow he is so fucking fluffy!...Okay girl stop he is looking at you weird...That’s it chill don't scare him away...Good remember dogs can smell psycho....Cool and calm yeah he is just a dog...BUT HE FUCKING ISN’T THIS IS THE BEAR!' you leaned down cooing at him making baby talk as he lapped up the love moving his head to make you hit the right spots around his ears and chin. You managed to get over the fangirling and enjoy scratching the good boys ears digging your fingers in the thick fur enjoying the softness.

"Oh look at you!? So sweet huh?.....Are you a good boy?....Yesh you are! Cute baby! Getting your chin scratches such a fluffy good boy!" You giggled as he seemed to take your compliments to heart thumping his tail a few beats then stood up you followed rubbing down his back as he moved.

He must have liked your attention because before you know it he was climbing onto his hind legs leaning over your lap with his front paws. From there Kal had sneakily gone the whole nine yards, the happy Akita had some how clambered up into the chair with you making it squeak under the strain as he engulfed your lap still receiving his well earned scratches. You giggled at him moving your arms around him letting him do as he pleased rubbing his belly and chest he sat content leaning his weight on your chest pinning you to the back of the seat.

You grinned wrapping him in a big hug still twisting his fur in your fingers diligently showering him with the attention the good handsome boy deserved.

"Wow look at you such a handsome boy!... OH kisses to? Well aren't I a lucky lady" you moved at he tilted his head back licking at your face being a right soppy little pup, out for all the love he could get.

"Wow your lucky Holly hasn't done my face yet, she won't like you ruining all her hard work!" He pulled away and just panted happily then rested his head on your shoulder huffing. You smiled still hugging him rubbing you face into his fur. Then out of the blue his tail began thumping your leg in excitement. You pulled back from the hug and brushed your fingers through his coat seeing Holly and Henry arrive.

"Oh haha. Looks like Kal made a friend!" Holly giggled Henry sighed looking for him then gasped doing a double take when he saw the Akita draped across you sitting on your lap leaning his head on one shoulder as you petted him. His heart clenched a smug sort of 'that’s my boy!' he enjoyed seeing you snuggling the bear, it was something he could get used to seeing. He snapped out of it and made his way to you both.

"KAL! You what are you doing boy? Come on down!...Tin-I err Y/n I am so sorry... He doesn't usually do this... Come on Kal you big lump! Your probably crushing her!" Kal eyed Henry from the corner of his eye pretending not to here him huffing loudly past your ear. You smiled and waved Henry off trying to be casual as your inner fangirl raged pretty much foaming at the mouth. You was thankful that Kal was ignoring his dad as his big frame hid your creeping blush giving you the confidence to speak as you tucked your face further into him as you spoke quietly.

"I-its fine really...I...Y-yeah was kind of worrying about today he I... I think he sensed my anxiety...His cuddle is helping a lot..." Henry stopped his approach eyeing the two of you. He meant what he said Kal was well behaved and gentle but he never cuddled on a stranger's lap, not like he did with him anyway. But he knew Kal picked up on anxiety attack's and it was entirely possible he had wandered in here and wanted to comfort you. Henry blushed a little and took his seat next to you nodding trying to take in the scene before him as much as possible.

"Okay...W-well don't let him guilt trip you, that boy gets so many cuddles its unbelievable... Just..I-if he gets to much get him down...He knows he isn’t allowed on the chairs..hehe not that you can tell... Its best not to spoil him too much" you flushed smooshing your face in to the Akita’s neck trying to hide from the man who seemed to be staring yet again. He moved forward placing two coffees before you then placed his in front of him. You rose a brow at the two cups.

"I-I...ahem I wasn't sure how you'd want it-fuck haha... Shit.... I meant the drink....you-your coffee...Fuck... I didn't know how you liked your coffee" you blinked at him as he got a little flustered you groaned as you reached forward peeking at the cup as Holly moved about behind you moving her equipment around.

"Henry was already picking you up a coffee insisted on getting it treated me to~" you smiled and reached over popping the lids the first black the other with milk.

"T-thank you ...you didn't have to" his face split into a grin as he mentally pat himself on the back.

"No no your welcome! These four am starts are pretty brutal for anyone to get used to..." he chuckled as you moved over sipping the coffee slowly, you tried not to pull a face it was a little to bitter for your taste needing one more sugar but you didn't want to seem rude. An awkward silence fell over the two of you and he sat there staring, you kept taking small sips trying to hide more in Kals shadow.

"S-Sorry for the coffee....Its a bit bitter I know...Should of added more sugar"

Henry was kicking himself as the silence grew, great fucking brilliant the first time he gets you alone and he says something like that!? scolding himself and his own fucking stupidity. 'How you'd want it? What the fuck Cavill?! Smooth why not just come out and say how should I fuck you? Yeah wait a go!' He sighed leaning back in the chair eyeing you as you sat clearly uncomfortable with him there 'yeah and now be a creeper and stare that will fucking help...Still staring mate stiilll staring....SAY SOMETHING FOR GOD SAKE!' That did the trick he could see you were trying to hide your distaste over the coffee. 'There apologize for shit coffee!' That was his opportunity!"S-Sorry for the coffee....Its a bit bitter I know...Should of added more sugar"  he watched with baited breath shivering as you licked at a small loose drip off your bottom lip and gulped. Definitely nervous... Or maybe you just didn't like him? That could be it! you did run from him and you flirted with Joey not him. Henry could feel a lump in his throat and felt a weight on his chest...Was that it you just didn't like him?...He hummed trying to ease the heavy feelings around him, his own anxiety starting to creep over him he clenched his jaw. No you had no reason to dislike him...You didn't know him he would just have to interact with you thats all...Make him self known then? And then? Maybe let you know he was interested...Drop hints?. He straightened up in his seat a wave of determination washed over him he tilted his head looking at Kal trying not to be creepy as shit.

"I err no thank you...I-its fine... Ive got a huge sweet tooth anyway..." he smiled you were talking, albeit quietly and stuttering but it was a start! He could work with that.

"I will have to...Err remember that for next time." He watched you spin the cup and frown slightly seeing the scribbled name on it. Shit you must think he was an ass! It wasn't your name it was his and Joeys nickname for you....Wow how could he think that was a good idea! You must think he'd forgot your actual name!

"I err me and-well that’s....Fuck" you looked at him a little sad. Yep definitely thought he'd forgot...Tinks had just stuck.

"Me err me and Joey ...well joey gave you a nick name so...it stuck I'm sorry you must think I'm a dick" you shook your head taking a deep breath closing your eyes then placed a false smile. For a self proclaimed 'non-actress' you did so effortlessly and supposedly without even knowing bottling up you feelings and slapping on a smile... He wasn't sure he liked it, faking a smile when he could tell he had upset you.

"It's fine...I don't think your a-a dick...H-how can I expect you to remember silly details like that... We did only meet once and you've got more things to worry about" 'and award to the biggest prick on set goes to drum roll...you ,you fucking ass! Fix it! Fix it now Henry! Look even Kal isn't impressed!' He quickly lent forward wanting to fix his fuck up like right fucking now!

"No! No nothing like...I mean its not a silly detail! Your name it's- y/n I know it! I know your name! Me and Joey have seen you around for a while he called you Tink's..Its after Tinkerbell!..A-a nickname just a nickname nothing meant by it!.....We called you it for so long it just stuck when we spoke about you and ....Well I thought it suited you so just sort of...Yeah.." you blinked at him then looked back to the cup.

"T-Tinkerbell?"

'Holy shit! They gave you a nickname oh my god! that’s crazy....Right focus girl see he didn't forget either he knows you knows your name!...Fuck me! life got weird quick' You bite your lip looking at him confused then glanced to the cup Tink's scribbled across it haphazardly. You smiled at it trying to fight down the building squeal of excitment, it was so sweet you it made you feel...welcome? You'd been worried that you being on the job now had put a strain on everyone. It seems as if everyone has had to work harder because of you and you felt almost...guilty like an inconvenience. Kal sat up pulling away from you then tucked his snout under your chin snorting into your chest. You moved ruffling the base of his ears lightly.

"T-Tinkerbell?" He smiled softly as you pampered Kal you must have started getting upset as Kal moved digging into you comforting you. He loved how Kal was helping you when he himself couldn't. He hissed through his teeth nervously and moved his head around slightly.

"Well...Yes Joey had seen you...And you reminded him of a fairy he just sort of started calling you Tink's you know? after Tinkerbell....It fits....Small and cute" you pressed your face back to Kal tucking your glowing cheeks. He called you cute 'aaaaahhhhhhhgggggg! Cute he. Henry-Mother-Fucking- Cavill called you cute! He thinks your fucking cute fuckingohmygod! Yes girl GET IT!...Right okay and chill woooo! Right yep done? done!'

"I...We will stop if you don't like it ...Its probably weird right?" You shook your head pulling away from his dog when you were sure you could pass the blush off as a chill or something.

"No its...Its fine...I-I just didn't think...You know cos of me you-everyone has a shit tonne more work now...Just feel like well..I don't know burden I suppose" his face dropped.

'you what? You thought you were a burden?' He blinked forgetting all his anxieties and nerves overcome with a need to help you, you got it wrong so so wrong he is ecstatic you were now his costar! He cant wait to get going! That’s why he is here nearly forty five minutes early! So he can get to know you he gathered you must be nervous and well...He wanted to be your knight in shinning amour....Or witcher in leather doublet a it were. Everyone who was 'in the know' was just so happy that you’d decided to do this, your saving The Witcher for Christ sake! But you didn't see it like that? He moved over grasping your hand without thinking,it was only when he felt you tense he realized he was touching you but by some act of god he managed to beat down a full blown fucking melt down trying not to dwell on how soft your skin was. 'Why it is so soft?....what does she do?...Moisturizer?.....Wonder if she'd let you watch?- WOAH OKAY THERE BOY SLOW DOWN!.....But she even smells ugh fuck could just eat this woman....Henry! Stop fucking sniffing her...Shes upset and your just here being so..FUCKING ...CRINGE! Seriously!?...Now would be the time to speak cavill...I mean you are just rubbing her wrist staring ...Again.' he swallowed managing to hopefully shake away his thought before you got too creeped out by him.

"No! No don't Please don't ever feel like that...Your not a burden to me or-or Joey or anyone here! Your keeping this going if it wasn't for you we'd all be out of work...I-I am really grateful for you choosing to help...I Love this role-this project and your the one who has saved it!...I know it must be hard trying to navigate all this but please if you ever need help or anything you can come to me ....Even if its just to talk ....Promise me if you ever start thinking or ever made to feel like that come talk to me...Okay I mean that y/n you can come talk to me anytime" Henry watched seeing an array of emotions cross your eyes you were still unsure but he would help. He would be there for you if it was the last thing he did, he wanted to be a colleague, friend, someone you could come to and confide in!

He wanted you to come to him if you got overwhelmed of upset he had already been speaking about the press tour after he was trying to make sure you were never going to be  alone in interviews he wanted to protect you form the more public side that was going to be the real shock. Filming was easy you knew what you were in for but tv? Journalists and critics? Yes that was going to be... A wake up call luckily for you Henry was going to be all over you by then he hoped. When it boiled down to it he wanted to be so much more then a mentor and friend but for now he would work towards friendship and try to get one conversation over with out fucking up stuttering or blushing. You blinked and nodded slowly.

"Th-thank you for saying that-" he shook his head you didn't believe him and smiled what he hoped was sincerely.

"Its not just words I do truly mean it Tink’s...I'm here for you and so is Kal apparently" he smiled when he got you to giggled the moment of doubt truly passed as you snuggled the bear again. 'And breath...Well that went well...Fuck she is so cute with him, I should get a picture...you know to commemorate her first proper day...Would that be weird of him? Hey can I have a photo of you to keep on my phone please?..Yeah okay maybe not like that' it was sweet watching as kal quickly become your teddy bear. The pup seemed not to mind in the slightest just happy to be getting away with blue murder and get cuddles for it!. He had moved and was now resting his head on your other shoulder sitting up with his back to Henry, Kal was basically hugging you tucking your neck and shoulder under his chin to his chest.

Henry smiled nodding cutely seemingly pleased with himself as he pulled back then. He blinked quickly as if remembering something and sat up getting his phone out he was about to speak but was cut off by the sound of the door as it opened again it was then that Holly made an appearance, you didn't even notice she had left. You smiled happy feeling better in yourself Henry's words meant something you actually believed that he meant it. It was nice to know he didn't hold anything against you for all the extra work your arrival had dumped on him.

"Haha! Here they are one wig for you sir! And for the lady!" She placed two wigs on the table in front of your respective chairs, both of which were pinned on two wig mannequin's. You placed you feet on the bar sitting up getting a groan for one Kal who was comfy.

"Oh shush you" Henry huffed a laugh as you scolded the bear. 

"Wow that’s... How'd they even do that?" Henry looked over to yours and whistled. It was sleek and very very light ah blonde you could just see a hint on lilac from the toner used giving the hair an almost ethereal look yet still a believable tone. Holly gushed

"I know right! They said they took into account your hair color now because of how it complimented your skin....Honestly it mean you wont need as much color correcting as before with the gold! And along side this these came to!" She moved producing a small pile of contact lenses boxes. You looked to her uneasy making some weird unconvincing sound.

"Oh hush love~ contacts aren't that bad! You just pop 'em in" you blinked and gave her a look.

"Yeah...pop em in your fucking eyes! That you need to see!...God they can't like slip back can they?" Henry and Holly chuckled and shaking their heads.

"No...They can't your lris is slightly bulged they sit on that bulge! I can categorical attest they do not slide back or get stuck...I promise trust me?" He tilted his head at you and you eyed the contacts 'well he has used them for a while..so he would know' you gave a slight nod

"Good I promise I won't stear you wrong! I normally wait until the hair and stuff is done and put them in just before make up, sometimes the hair on the wig can get catch them when styling and that is a bit uncomfortable especially if they move" you snapped your gaze to him

"M-Move!? B-but you- You just said they don’t!" He chuckled rubbing his hand over his neck.

"I-I well yes I did just say that...W-What I meant is they can't go to the back of your eye...But if you touch them once in they can slip just...Once their in don't touch them until you want to take them out and you will be fine" you eyed him carefully and nodded.

Holly moved about the room quickly switching make up pallets and the woman in charge of Henry's hair and make up came in with her kit opening it ready to get started. You couldn't help but be relieved in a way to have him turn and stat a conversation with her taking the heat off you. 'AANNDD BREATH...well that wasn't to bad? Sure you used kal as a hiding spot but the good boy didn't mind' you looked to the content dog still rubbing his tummy absent minded. 'Yeah the bear was happy, soo your first real conversation with the stunningly handsome Mr Cavill wasn't to bad....But fuck he thought you were cute? Oh boy that is just fucking mind blown! There you go girl you could die right now and be one very happy woman!... And he wants to help you! And you know I do think he meant that....He is very sweet, and he got you coffee! AAAHHHGGG! Like not dinner but the man got you food...Well food it was a coffee...Still he got it for you babe! You go girl!' Your thoughts were interrupted when a cheerful Joey made an appearance at the door

"Good morning! How are we all today?" You smiled at how happy he was. He got a series of replies from grunts to 'fine how are you?' He spotted you and laughed.

"Shit Kal? Pulling the moves already? You know she's twice your age a tleast?" The dog huffed and you petted him giggling.

"Don’t listen to him boy~ you be you...such a good little pup huh? Yesh you are...And your keeping me warm huh? Little hot water bottle....Yesh you are...You an sit on my lap any time good baby~" Henry chuckled out of the side of his mouth trying not to move as his make up artist began to comb through his hair readying him for the wig.

"God don't tell him that, he would never get off if he could help it, he love his cuddles...And snout kisses its why he is holding his head like that by the way...He wants kisses" you giggled and looked at Kal who was sitting still holding his cheek near your face.

"Oh baby~ you want kisses?" You quickly moved in peppering kisses on his cheek. When you stopped you laughed as he turned to you giving kisses back. Henry smiled your laugh becoming something he was determined to hear at least once a day!

Joey watched slyly. It seemed Henry was going to have Kal be a wing man...dog? In his journey of wooing you. He smirked he would help to! It was clear that you liked Henry ...Henry certainly liked you so it won't take to much pushing.

"So Henry...What are you doing here? Your early not meant to be here until five. " Henry froze and looked panicked and met Joeys eyes in the mirror. Joey smirked knowing full well You had heard Henry squinted at the singer giving him a 'what the fuck?' Look

."I-I wanted to make sure Tinks was okay...It is her first day...Dont want her to be in here going through the motions alone we are a team" Joey smirked 'well okay if that how you want to play'

"Thats very sweet of you!, Oh! Yes we need pictures! It is your first day Tinks!" He turned to Henry's artist who had just got the wig on. Leaning down he grasped the witchers shoulders squeezing.

"Can I brorrow him?" She smiled nodding with a chuckle Joey smiled and ushered Henry up swiping the mans phone from the side and handed it to Holly, who took it and stepped back as joey spun your chair around to face her.

"Do you mind? We need to document this, The day the witcher was saved!" You blushed as both Joey and Henry stood either side of you ,They each crouched a little placing their faces next to yours and smiled, Henry had tucked kal's head to the side so he could get a good view of you. Once the photos were snapped Joey looked at them excited.

"Wow! Henry you have to send these to me so I can tweet them!" You blushed as Henry nodded grinning then looked you his screen then to you. He could kiss Joey! Henry now had a reason to get your number, whatsapp ,face book fuck everything!

"I will send these to you...You know if you want, I mean you don't have to if Joey is tweeting them... But I could send them....Only if you want... No pressure!" Joey sighed watching the great white wolf fumble over his words still rambling. Even the other women were watching fascinated as the unshakable Henry got himself all flustered.

"You know make memories... A-along the way...You never know Tink’s could be the start of a completely new career!haha..." An awkward silence fell over the room as henry eventually trailed of with a nervous laugh. Joeys eyes fell to you, you sat dead still shocked then finally blinked snapping out of what ever thoughts were going on you were slowly blushing. You were definitely interested.

"I-I err sure you can send them to me... Here I'll give to my number..." Joey smiled nodding pleased with himself. That worked beautifully if he did say so himself. Henry sent him a thankful glance as you exchanged numbers. He turned as he had a tap on his shoulder.

"Oh god its time already? I hoped to get to know our Tink's...Oh well we can chat on set" he moved around you sitting on the other side of Henry and sat down letting his own artist begin.

You had sat in the chair for another hour or so getting tweaked then had been ushered to change in a sectioned off little changing room. You came back out ready to see Keira for the first time. Henry and Joey stole glances at you

"Wow...Fuck you look...Wow" you smiled at Henry shyly as he kept sweeping his eyes over you seemingly awed at the final look. If you were honest it made you a little self conscious. How could it not! he was; if you squinted, kind of checking you out..In a way? you avoided eye contact willing yourself to calm down as your heart pounded away at top speed.

"What he means is you look fantastic!" You smiled unsure and pulled at the skirt of the dress, your first scene with them was a party so it was very elegant it was designed to be seductive with a swooping neckline and swirling delicate detailing over the collar  it was heavy to being made out of a heavy velvet material you were happy there wasn't any running you'd collapse in minuets.

"Th-thanks...Its heavier then I remember..." Joey smiled admiring the look."You look brilliant! Look Henry is speechless!" Henry swallowed  dryly. Fuck you looked quickly then turned away... Wow... His fantasy was nothing compared to you here in full costume... Henry shook his head remembering every detail to recall later.

"Y-you look...Better then I imagined! It-she....Your..." you flushed a little and moved past him to your seat wanting to sit down and calm yourself being in costume had brought it home you were doing this...You were going to actually be in witcher as a cast member!. You sat down taking a deep breath. You could feel the anxiety .Shit. Kal popped his head out from under Henry and glanced up at you he was still sulking.

"What puppy?! I'm sorry...I know Holly is so mean huh? making you jump down like that" He huffed again ears twitching then he heaved himself up again and sat before you tapping you with a large paw, you smoothed your hands across him somehow just petting the gentle boy was calming you down. Henry and Joey exchanged looks Kal must be picking up on your nerves.

"Yes oh I know... But don't worry we can have cuddles after okay?" You said calming considerably as you spoke to him. Henry chuckled at the exchange and Joey piped up.

"Is he being a grumpy boy?" Henry tilted his head.

"No a needy boy I think... he has got a new favorite snuggle buddy" you blushed at that and soon Kal laid down out of petting distance. All three of you were nearly done...Well you were done, you hadn't until now seen the whole get up together wardrobe and hair and make up had been separate until now. You quickly glanced up and froze wow...This new wig was definitely better now, you felt... you didn't know it was completely strange seeing someone different staring back at you in the mirror.

"Wow....Thats-this is crazy..." you leaned in turning your head this way and that moving your hand slowly to your face, Henry smiled at you.

"Yes...It's always strange the first time in character..." you nodded to him dumbly still inspecting yourself moving to run your fingers threw you 'hair'

"So fucking weird"

"And about to get a whole lot weirder! time for these bad boys~" you whined at Holly as you watched her wave the slim box holing your contacts.

"Oh? please tell me she isn't getting blue? I love the green!"Joey protest was flattering as he and Henry came closer wanting to see, you stood awkwardly twisting your hands in the sleeves of your costume. Henry smiled opening your box peeking at the color

"Hey...They're going to look amazing! Tink’s you get green look!" Joey leaned over and smiled

"Yeah and they have that nice dark ring around the outside to! really going to pop...Well come on girl get them in we have what ten minuets?" he directed his question to Holly who giggled nodding. You gulped looking at the small colored discs warily...

"How? I've never...They're safe right? wont get stuck of something?" Henry seeing another opportunity to bond with you jumped up collecting his own contacts box Joey took a step back so you could et closer and watch Henry's lesson smirking knowingly as a stupid uncharacteristic grin spread across 'Geralt's' face.

"Here look its fine...Just hold it like this...And pinch it if it folds like this..see? Like that...Then its okay if it curls out and has a lip then its inside out." You watched as he gave you a quick glance.

"I-Inside out? wh-what happens if that happens?" Henry quickly tried reassuring you.

"No! its not-it will just be uncomfortable...Nothing bad will happen or anything its just irritable....Right pick yours up like I’m doing...That's it!...See...Then hold open your eye and....Just try and pop it in...You can do it looking down or up which ever is comfy, I'm used to it so can do it standing up right....And if it moved like mine just has...Typical! just look around and....There see! easy!" Henry explained his contacts lesson well, it did seem simple he let you watch as he placed in the other contact explaining once again how to put them in as he did. You watched intently blushing each time he moved in closer so you could see.

"O-okay...So just press it and it will stick?" he nodded and you bit your lip 'come on girl...that's it just like when you do liquid eyeliner stab your eyeball with it!' you looked to you mirror and began to poke your eyes with Henry and joey watching closely commenting as you did so. One Joey pep-talk and eighteen tries later you finally got them in with a tiny round of applause ,It was actually pretty cool, your eyes popped a really bright and had a dark ring that made your iris a little larger adding to the ethereal atheistic.

The three of you made your way out of the trailer as Geralt ,Jaskier and keira. You took a deep breath when you saw the cameras and lighting as you walked onto set.

"Fuck...shit, shit, shit" Henry and Joey slowed walking beside you patting your back. Henry wrapped an arm around you making sure you didn't bolt which you looked ready to any second, had you not been so panicked you would have clammed up under his heavy arm but it wasn’t on the top of your list of things to worry about right now. Joey followed suit holding you around your back squishing you between them and smiled down at you directing you to the frightening amount of people milling about doing various jobs.

you’d seen it all before but being behind the scenes was completely different to being in front of the camera you slowed until you was barley moving at all.

"Come on Tink’s" with his prompting Joey had in fact sped you up a little, he was stronger then he looked. You took deep breaths trying not to freak out as everyone turned looking at the new comer.

"Th-thats a lot of people.." Joey and Henry hummed in agreement

"Well its a big deal...you've been cherry picked from the assistants Tink's word has got around but everyone wants a peek.." Joey cheerful as ever chuckled into your hair as they got closer to Tomasz who was waiting for you all.

It  was when you saw the director that you really freaked trying to turn around but they two men grunted

"Oh no you don't...Come on your fine"

"I forgot my lines" Henry scoffed

"That fine we memorized them for you to, besides why do you think Tomasz made you do improv?"

"O-okay....I need the bathroom" Joey giggled still helping guide you into the huge makeshift banquet hall

"No you don't its nerves" you shook as they continued ushering you out in front of the crew

"I'm going to be sick" Henry chuckled as bad as it was he couldn't help thinking you looked pretty cute panicking like this trying desperately to find a way to run off and hide.

"Again that’s nerves just breath...We wont let anything happen okay? just take a deep breath...Good now out your going to be fine" you did as he had said to focused on the upcoming filming to even squeal about him looking out for you.

Finally you stopped in front of Tomasz who smiled at you kindly.

"Wow...Look at you! perfect! absolutely perfect! Ready?" You shook your head looking around it felt like everyone involved in the projects was hear to see the stand in.

"No...Not really" he laughed and shook his head at you...You were serious....didn't he think you were serious you fucking was! You didn't know whether you needed to be sick, panic ,cry or use the bathroom.

"...Why are there so many people?" He eyed the crowd

"Well you did pull this whole production from the brink of collapse...They are bound to want to see to woman who has stepped up...I'm sure everyone has told you already but this is a big deal...I don't think I have heard of someone completely untrained taking a role like this. Any way enough chit chat lets get to work shall we?" you were shaking in Keira's boots but...By way the two men still had you stuck firmly between them he knew you'd have all the support you needed, once you started it would be fine.

"Trust me you’ll do fine" he turned with a huge grin

"Places everyone! Remember camera four you start now from the top a sweeping motion left you right? good!" You gulped stomach dropping soon Henry and Joey are moving to their cue's leaving you with one final squeeze and your left on your own wondering. How the fuck did this happen again?.

You took a breath closing your eyes tight looking down collecting yourself pulling a more confident catty seductive woman from within. Unbeknown to you a hush fell over the scene as you did everyone holding their breath waiting to see if you could pull this off.

Joey smiled from beside Henry and said something but Henry didn't even hear what the man had to say, he just smirked entranced as he watched you transform before everyone about to prove to yourself and everyone in the room you could do this. Its what you did last time you closed your eyes and when you opened them you wasn't there anymore.

For anyone who understood what it was, it was incredible to watch everything changed your posture , your aura, your presence felt heavy and playful he could feel it from way over here. When your eyes opened you was a completely different person you could feel it here and now there was no y/n; you was Keira through and through. then with a slow count down the scene began.

"ACTION" you smirked holding your head high. Here we go!

[bchanslvr]

𝐁𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐦𝐞

      pairing - Draco X Harry, and Draco/Astoria will be mentioned

      summary - Just some after the war Drarry with some angst and fluff.

      warnings - none :)

      words - 2, 568

      side-note - The beginning might seem a bit boring but I swear the further you read the more interesting it gets :>

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It was yet another boring day at work in the ministry. Harry was the head Auror along with his assistant Jade. She was helpful and helped Harry a lot. Even outside of work. So much so that most people thought they were dating. But they always responded with ' He's like a brother to me ' or ' She has a boyfriend ' whenever they asked them about it.

On the other side of him was Draco Malfoy. The head of the bank ministry. After the war, he had married Astoria and found himself a decent job to support them. Harry had dated Ginny for a while after the war till they broke up because they knew that the chemistry they had before wasn't working.

Harry and Draco would see each other almost every Fridays or Saturdays. Fridays were for work and or meetings. As Saturdays were for catching up or getting tea. And in the weekdays (excluding Friday) a quick nod or a smile, or a simple 'Good Morning' was always visible between the two.

The Golden Trio and the Bronze Trio had made up after the war and were good friends now.  But only Hermione and Ron knew about Harry's silly crush on Malfoy. And they’d tease him about it all the time.

He was devastated when he found out that Draco had married Astoria and planned on starting a family with her soon.

Many people thought that Harry would marry Ginny and have children with her but due to certain circumstances that didn’t work out.  

Harry tried so hard to move on but he was helpless. He tried dating others to keep his mind away from Malfoy but he couldn’t. Because every time he was reminded of soft blonde hair, crystal grey eyes, expensive cologne, and snarky comments. And it was especially difficult to keep these emotions when they met up almost every day.

Speaking of meeting up, today was a Saturday which means he'd get to hang out with Draco.

Harry was in his room in Grimmauld place getting ready for a nice evening at a nearby cafe with Draco.

It was the middle of summer meaning it was very hot in London. Harry was wearing a white button-up t-shirt underneath a plain dark navy blue jumper with beige pants, white socks, and checkered Vans shoes. After he left his house and was halfway there, he realized it was actually quite windy today despite the scorching sun blazing down on the streets. ‘Maybe I should have brought a jacket’ he thought as he crossed the street to the cafe,

The thought immediately disappearing once he found Draco sitting there in one of the corners drinking coffee. He made his way over to Draco and sat on the opposite of him.

Draco was wearing a dark blue shirt, tucked into some black jeans with black dress shoes, and he looked extremely hot just sitting there and sipping his coffee looking around like he had no care in the world. Harry tried his best to not blush when he saw Draco starting him discreetly as if he was trying to see what’s underneath-

Clearing his throat Harry said “Good Evening Draco”

“Good evening to you too Harry“ Draco replied as he looked out the window as if he was embarrassed.

‘Why is today so awkward?‘ Harry asked himself.

‘Is maybe today the day I should ask him?..., Who am I kidding he’s married... and I think even if he’s wasn’t he wouldn't like me that way, plus I think he doesn’t even like guys and-‘

He was shook away from his thoughts as a waitress pulled up next to him to ask his order. Harry ordered a medium hot chocolate with extra marshmallows, to reduce the amount of coffee he usually drinks at work.

After she left, Harry took another minute to stare at the man in front of him only to realize he was already being stared at.

A light tint of pink almost barely visible was spreading on Draco’s cheeks as he was caught in the act. A light blush also appearing on Harry’s cheeks as he realized that Draco was staring at him.

Not wanting to accept speechlessness or defeat Draco asked "So... um, How are you, Harry?"

‘Wow Draco, so smooth‘ He told himself as he waited for Harry’s answer.

"Ummm, ya I’m good, h-how is everything going on with you?" Harry strutted as he blushed more.

"Pretty good. My team is working on a somewhat difficult project but they’re doing a good job and Astoria's job is also going great"

"Oh..." said Harry sipping his chocolate trying not to sound as if his heart didn’t break from the inside.

"Are you okay Harry?” Draco asked, concerned slightly at how Harry suddenly became quiet.

"Yeah I'm fine...," Harry lied.

Another minute of silence passed as both took sips out of their drinks and occasionally stopped to look at each other for a brief second without letting the other know.

It was too awkward for Draco to handle so as a distraction from the silence Draco asked “So, umm, h-have you found a boyfriend or a girlfriend yet?”

"No, not yet..." replied Harry.

Harry was openly bi seeing nothing wrong with hiding it. And let’s just say Draco and Cedric might have been his bi awakening in his school years.

Almost everyone he knew were dating. Ron and Hermione, Pansy and Blaise, Ginny and Luna, Dean and Seamus, Jade and Zach, and lastly Draco and Astoria...

He was the only single one(seeming to never be consistent with keeping a partner because they always reminded him of Draco).

Everyone would always ask Harry if he had anyone in mind because they hated seeing Harry being lonely while everyone had a significant other. But he’d always reply with a no. But the truth is, he did have someone in mind but they already had someone.

"You should find someone Harry...," said Draco feeling sympathy for the man in front of him.

"Yes, I know..."

There was a long silence once more but it wasn’t like earlier when it was awkward. It was sort of comforting, yet kind of lonely.

"I think I should leave...," called Harry as he began to rise from his seat

"No don't!"

Draco held out his hand to Harry, to keep him there. They both blushed at the sudden contact.

"Okay... So, how is everything going on with umm... Astoria?" asked Harry trying to change the subject.

"Great. She's very kind and understanding."

"Oh...," Harry tried to hold back a tear as he thought about how Draco was already happy with someone else.

‘You know what. Fuck it.‘ thought Harry.

‘If now isn’t the time to ask him then there is no other‘

"D-Draco c-could you come with me somewhere?" Harry asked keeping his head down in case he got rejected.

"Okay," Draco replied as curiosity got the best of him.

It seemed like the right thing to say because Harry’s face lit up with a small smile.

Harry practically almost begged(not really) the waitress to come collect their drinks and for them to pay so they could get out of the shop sooner.

Once sorting out that mess, Harry dragged Draco out of the shop.

“So, where are we going?”

“Well, that’s a surprise. Follow me!“ said Harry and he started running without a warning making Draco follow him to wherever he was taking him.

Draco followed Harry through alleys, shops, doors, tunnels, almost all the way to the other side of the village.

‘How in Merlin is he still so energetic and fast,‘ Draco wondered as he ran and ran, following behind Harry.

Draco was getting tired, and so was Harry as he started slowing down near the end of their run.

Draco closed his eyes for a second to catch his breathing and when he opened them back up, Harry was standing there, right in front of him.

“Well?“

Harry simply just smiled before taking Draco’s hands with his own and intertwining them.

Draco inhaled sharply, Harry’s hands were so soft and warm. They were like a warm blanket that could protect you from all the horrors of the world as long as you're with them.

Harry was swinging their hands slightly as he walked them both through a small opening near a wall.

“We’re almost there,“ said Harry. Draco jumped slightly at Harry’s voice. He had been so caught up with holding Harry’s hands, that he nearly forgot they were going somewhere.

They stepped through the opening and-

Draco gasped loudly, shock written on his entire face.

A huge green meadow was flowing through his feet, it filled with all kinds of flowers, and fireflies dancing about. The sky now dark with ink, shining brightly of crystals, the moon electing an ethereal glow down onto the lands. A small tree-house was visible among the distance of the hundreds of trees littering the area as a barrier. This place looked like an area from a fantasy book. So mesmerizing, yet so unreal.

"It’s a really pretty place isn't it Draco?" asked Harry as he started up at the sky watching the stars flicker.

"Yes, it really is," Draco said in awe.

“How did you find this place?,“ questioned Draco as he continued to look around.

Harry laughed a small bitter laugh before saying something that broke Draco’s heart, “Sirius, my godfather, he showed this place, before you know...”

“He said this was a place that he used to hangout lot with my father and Remus, and Peter...,“ Harry’s eyes were now glazed, looking at the sky as if his parents and godfather would just magically appear before his eyes and tell him that everything was not real and that they were actually there.

Draco saw as Harry deep breath before closing his eyes and opening them back again to look at him with a look of pure love and admiration making Draco heart ache.

He squeezed Harry’s hands softly before asking him, "Why did you bring me here? Not that I’m complaining,” Draco chuckled “I feel honored to be here”

"Umm... Well... I wanted to tell y-you something...," strutted Harry, suddenly feeling nervous.

"Well what is it?," Draco asked.

He turned around to face Harry who's face was red and looking at the ground as if he was a small child, cowering in fear. Concerned he lifted Harry's chin so he was looking at him. Draco couldn't help but stare at those gorgeous green eyes he’s dreamed about, the green in his eyes looking like little galaxies. Harry stared right back at the sparkling grey ones, the grey eyes he’s seen so many times. They didn't know how but their faces were mere inches away from each other when they snapped back into reality.

Harry took a deep breath before building up some courage to say, "Draco... I-I like you..."

"Y-you like me?..." asked Draco, shock once more written on his face. He questioned internally if he was hearing this correctly or if this was his imagination.

"Yes, you. I’ve liked you a lot ever since third year. I can't keep my feelings for you hidden anymore Draco. It killed me when I found out you married Astoria. I tried to keep my mind away from you by dating others but I couldn't because they could never be like you. I’ll understand if you don’t like me or don’t want to be my friend anymore. I have to express my feelings for you now, or it’s never."

"Oh, Harry... I-I like you too, ever since we met,” now it was Harry’s turn to be shocked. ‘Draco’s joking, right? He doesn’t really love me right? right?,’ Harry questioned.

“I'm really sorry Harry, I never meant to hurt you. I’ve liked you a lot Harry, so much! And I know I never really expressed any of it during the war or school you know... I’m really sorry Harry! I really am and I never even wanted to marry Astoria! Yes, she’s really amazing and all a pure-blood man could ask for but... I want you. The only reason I married her was because my father forced me to so we can continue the bloodline. We only pretend to like each other Harry, and we’ve never even touched each other other than the kiss at the wedding at some kisses here and there for paparazzi. "

"Your lying! I know you are! You’d never like me!”

“S-she's prettier than me, and she’s so much more kinder and nicer than me, and s-she’s... I’m nothing like her and-

"Shut up Harry! You have no idea how fucking gorgeous you are! Your eyes look like emeralds, so fucking beautiful and mesmerizing. You're so kind and nice to everyone. You've saved so many people! Hell, you sacrificed yourself for the whole wizarding world! YOU defeated the dark lord Harry! You... You even gave me a second chance..."

Harry blushed at the compliment given by Draco. They were still staring at each other their faces almost pressing. Draco was looking down. Harry couldn't stand Draco like this.

One of his favorite things about Draco is how he can take care of himself without needing other people’s help. He knew that if he was Draco’s boyfriend, he didn’t have to take care of anything. He was tired of taking care of others, he wanted others to take care of him. And here he was Draco, who would do that for him. Take care of him, love him, and treat him like an equal human being instead of Harry Potter. He knew that Draco liked him because of his personality and not for who he was. That’s why he loved him so much.

He lifted up Draco’s chin and kissed him, full on the lips. Draco was shocked but kissed him back. He’s been waiting for this moment for so long, he wasn’t going to end it here. Not ever.

His hands traveled down Harry's back down to his waist holding him there not letting him go anywhere for the last time. Harry's hands were on Draco's neck and his hair holding him. Draco was his and his only from now on.

It was nothing like the kisses they had with Ginny or Astoria. It could never compare. This wasn’t just any kiss, it was the kiss.

There wasn’t any sympathy or pity or pain, no. It was filled with pure love, adoration, and passion for one another. He didn’t want to change any of this, and it wasn’t ever going to.

They pulled apart for air, their foreheads resting on one another, eyes closed in bliss and contentment. They looked into each others eyes and smiled. A true smile, no sneers, no smirks, a true genuine smile.

Tears were running down Harry's face. He had finally gotten the Happy Ending he wanted.

They shared a brief kiss before they sat down on the grass, Harry's head on Draco's lap staring at the now fully sparkling, crystal sky. Draco stroked Harry's hair grinning from ear to ear. He was finally happy.

“Harry?“

“Yes?“

“Will you be my boyfriend?“ Draco asked as he looked down at those green eyes that had made him fall in love.

“Of course,“ Harry replied staring at his grey eyes that haunted him wherever he went.

"I love you Draco"

"I love you too Harry"

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Hello everyone! I hope your having a wonderful day or if your going to sleep then have a wonderful night! I was in the mood to write and I cooked this baby up and I don’t know how to feel about this. I haven’t written in a while so sorry if this is a little all over the place, and a little crappy. Anyways I hope you enjoyed this! 

And now I’m going to tag two of my favorite people so they can criticize this:

@choke-me-pansy and @dearhogwarts

[moodymidnightkitten]

Spark

A/N: Woof, what a busy holiday season, well anyways I’m back and new binging Black Clover, so heres my official fan application, an almost 2k fanfic for Zora Ideale. 

Genre: fluff

w/c: 1939

Synopsis: reader from the real human universe lands herself in the Black Clover Universe (I could describe this more but I’m pulling blanks, feedback on how to make this better after y’all read this, that would be great.)

Pair: Zora Ideale x Reader

Ope heres my masterlist 

Ugh god, what time is it? You asked, rubbing your head, sitting on cold hard ground outside. A completely different place from where you were, napping in a cozy warm bed at home in, reality? You've seen enough anime to know that this definitely not the normal home setting you're used to. But what anime? You looked around, doing a complete 180 and coming face to face with the one and only Black Bulls hideout. 

"No fucking way," you mumbled to yourself. What in the magical hell is this? Also, what the hell are you supposed to do now? 

"Ooooo who are you?!" A memorable voice chimed in behind you. Turning around you came face to face with no other than Asta. 

You scratched the back of your head and gave the most non convincing fake smile you could muster up in this situation. Completely flustered and star struck. 

"Oh, I uhm, my name is y/n," you gave a measly laugh. 

"Are you a spatial magic user? You just fell from the sky?!" He loudly stated. You knew there was only one clear cut way into figuring out your situation. 

"Actually no, I don't even know how I got here, but do you think you'd be able to get me to the Wizard King, he might be able to help.." you suggested. 

Astas eyes lead beyond you through your request, you didn't feel it until now but a towering and looming figure was now behind you, with a voice that most certainly matched the profile, it was Yami, the captain of the Black Bulls. 

"Oi, you'd have better luck with me, Asta, you're to come with us," was all he said as he walked past you and grabbed onto Astas collar and pulled him with him as well. Everything happened so quickly you had to do a light jog to catch up with them. 

"I really appreciate this, thank you," you said in between huff's of air trying to fill your lungs back up. 

"Your clothes are a give away to your difference in upbringing. As well as I watched you just fall, so I also want to know how you got to 'this world'' Yami was short and to the point, as he's always portrayed. 

"Well I appreciate this a lot Captain Yami and Asta," as soon as you said their names Yami stopped walking. 

"How do you know who we are?" He grumbled in confusion. 

"You won't believe me when I tell you but, this place, and everyone here is actually a show, more namely, an anime where I'm from," you probably sounded crazy. Actually not probably, most certainly because the two men looked at each other and laughed the most hearty laugh you've ever heard. And so with everything being said, all three of you continued you way to see the Wizard King.

After meeting with the Wizard King who basically certified that you're from another plane of existence who entrusted Yami to watch over you. Although you're not from here the wizard king ensured that you came here with magic powers. So now you were a part of the Black Bulls. 

But now you were stuck with living with one of your anime men crushes. Zora Ideale. It's not like you've never been around men you were attracted to, but this is just on some whole new level. This was fictional beauty and desire come true. 

Those were the only thoughts going through your head on top of the fact you now had to learn your new magical powers and make yourself an asset to your new team. It's only stressful because it's time and space magic. So what, are you now Doctor fucking Strange? It made your head hurt thinking about it all too much. What's even more intense is the fact you bent realities while SLEEPING. How in the hell were you going to figure all of that out. But hey, at least you have a pretty nice grimoire. Black marble with gold tripping and a dazzling black diamond looking clover embedded on the cover. 

“Ah, finally back,” You heard Yami exasperate as you three came up to the base. Pushing open the doors and allowing you and Asta to walk inside. Everyone else of the Black Bulls was busy doing whatever they usually do as you walked in, Yami stopped shortly ahead of you and yelled. 

“Alright, listen up fuckers, we have a new member today, this is y/n, make yourself acquainted. Finral, bathroom.” Was all he said as Finral rushed over, stars dancing in his eyes upon looking at you.  You smiled back at him as Vanessa wrapped herself around your shoulders, clad in only lingerie with a bottle of cheap wine in her free hand. 

“Oooo where did you get such an outfit?! So cute!” Vanessa said, slowly peeling herself away from you and taking you all in, slowly but surely everyone else introduced themselves and bombarded you with questions, all except Zora, who seemed to be sleeping on the couch across the room very obviously trying to ignore the whole situation. Luckily enough for you Asta made his introduction for him so now it wouldn’t be weird for you to know who he was already. 

“Let me show you around!” Asta exclaimed, eagerly walking ahead of you, you followed him, taking one small peek behind you at the handsome masked man laying on the couch, who was actually peering at you through slitted eyes, causing a blush to paint on your cheeks as you quickly looked ahead of you and pressing your grimoire to your chest. All you heard behind you with a small chuckle causing your small blush into a blazing one. 

You got settled in very quickly and spent most of your days getting along and getting to know mostly everyone on the team. It was nice, you didn’t feel out of place and you’ve actually been able to use a little bit of magic here and there with the help of everyone around you. Of course thoughts of live at home, normal real home crept into your mind but you were practically begging to be in some new reality and experience the unreal, and now look, your sheer will bent the universes and landed you here. Could you really complain? 

At the current moment in time you were sitting on your own reading in the main common area while everyone else was either on a mission or also enjoying their time off. Except Zora, who quite unusually will just chill against the wall or on the couch when he isn't in town or traveling about to mess around with dirty nobles. But right now felt more intense, like someone was staring at you, and not just someone, but Zora, his piercing gaze felt like no other. It was like a scientist waiting for a rat to do something out of the normal. You turned in your seat and to no surprise there he was with his sea blue eyes just peering at you, causing the ever so common raging blush to paint your face, but you weren’t going to let that stop you from confronting him. 

“If you’re going to stare at me you might as well take a picture of me cretin,” you boldly stated, turning back in your seat. Why did you have to call him a cretin? What normal person just calls people cretins? Luckily he must have not taken offense because he was laughing and he walked over and sat next to you. 

“Cretin? Interesting way of flirting with me Cherry,” you looked down from your book and saw him with his head in his hand. His witty comeback against you was very obviously a job at how red your cheeks got when you were around him. 

“Well I wasn’t flirting with you, Match Book,” a stupid jab at has his hair looked also wasn’t the way to go but I guess this classic middle school back and forth flirting was how it was going to go. And it seemed to be the best option available because you now felt more comfortable in his presence and it seemed you two were getting along. 

“What do you want anyways Zora?” You asked, shutting your book and placing it on the table. He raised his eyebrow. 

“Let’s go for a walk,” with that he stood up without waiting for an answer and made his way to the door. Quickly you got up and followed him. You two didn’t speak for a bit as you walked, eventually you two came up to a small lake a few hundred feet from the base, Zora sat down in one of the clear patches, you decided to take up residence a few inches away. 

“This is beautiful,” you smiled, looking out to the peaceful lake glistening in the evening sun. 

“It is, but not as much as you.” Zora said, so blatant and straight forward. And if your face has never been this red and on fire before, well it was now. You didn’t even know you stopped breathing until, well, you needed air. 

“What..?” You looked at him as he was still peering at the lake.

“Oi, I’m not going to repeat myself,” Zora said in the most disgruntled way. 

“You’re different, everything about you, you don’t know what youre doing, you’re clumsy, your cheeks get this cozy red when I’m around, you radiate this positive do good energy and I’m drawn to it, I’ve been watching you since you got here, you’re intriguing,” he kept talking so honestly it made you wonder when he would ever stop flattering you, before you could say anything he said one last thing. 

“I want to get to know you.” He finally looked at you wearing a weak smile with a blazing blush that was so strong it krept a bit up and past his mask. 

“That was a lot, all at once, and to say I don’t feel anything back would be a lie, personally you radiate lawful chaotic energy but it's fun, I want to get to know you better as well.” You smiled and so didn’t he as you two looked back to the lake. You two sat there peacefully before being interrupted by someone gracefully coming through a spatial magic portal, wearing robes you know all too well, braided hair and the obvious facial marking, Licht. 

“Y/n, I see you’ve arrived,” he said calmly. “You probably don’t know who I am, but I know all about you,” dread filled your body like a subzero frost striking your bones. 

“I know who you are. What do you want.” Licht smiled at you. 

“I want to show you why you’re here,” he offered once he got closer but before you knew it Zora jumped in between you two. 

“Listen freakshow, she’s not going anywhere with you,” You could see every muscle in Zoras body tense in front of you, the tip of your nose practically touching his back. Licht chuckled.

“Hmm? I wasn’t offering,” Before you could even blink Zoras body was thrown away and now nothing stood in between you and Licht and before you knew it a force hit your body so hard you blacked out, slowly but surely phasing in and out of sleepy, your name was being yelled and fading out in the background and you felt you body being raised off the ground, the last thing you saw was Zora reaching out to you as much as he could, fingertips grazing upon your own as you slipped out of consciousness.

[spinchip]

ooo if you're taking prompts maybe something with amara? i'd love to see her and zane talk about seer stuff and goof off together

A/N: This got out of hand. 2500 words, it’s some Zane and Amara bonding, then Zane gets a scary vision and Amara and Alma help him through it. Warning for Zanes vision: blood, gore, body horror. no main characters or ocs are hurt!

Amara hit the training mat with a grunt, rolling across the soft of it with the force of the throw, letting her arms flop uselessly as she splayed out on her back. She heaves out a breath, sweat slick on her forehead and frizzing the edges of her hair.

“I think i’m starting to get it!” She announces, breathless, and Zane grins behind his hand. Amara may have an affinity for things to do with psychics and visions, but martial arts was a bit out of her skill level.

Lloyd smiles apologetically, hands on his knees as he leans over her, “I’ll try coming in a little easier and give you a chance to practice the counter in slow motion.”

“You know, that sounds good and all, but i think i might sit this next little bit out. Gonna let the lesson sink in a little, you know? Sleep on it and all.” She nods to herself, folding her hands over her stomach as if she’s totally meant to be laying in the middle of the training ground.

“Sounds good.” Lloyd laughs and lets her off easy, offering his hand to pull her up.

After working together to get her off the ground, Amara presses a hand to the stitch in her side and hobbles her way over to the others, who’d been watching the impromptu training session with amused eyes, “That’s the last time I watch you train.” She mutters when she gets within hearing range, giving Zane a teasing stink eye.

Cole takes her spot, running a few drills with Lloyd in a much smoother and confident way than Amara had. She seems unbothered, stretching out her tense muscles.

“You did very well for your first time.” Zane offers, moving into a simple yoga pose that he motions for Amara to imitate.

“Thanks.” She sighs deeply, rolling her shoulders, “I try to keep myself in alright shape, but this was a bit more advanced than jogging or lifting weights.” She mutters, shifting into the tree pose, letting her body cool down from the heavy workout, “Grandma works out too. Keeping your body active helps keep your mind active, most seers try and hold a healthy routine.”

“Physical exercise helps with visions?”

Amara shrugs, “Exercise, eating right, meditation, all that. Your body is a temple or something. These abilities we have cost you, the toll they take can be rough if you’re not prepared, though I suppose you’d have an advantage on the physical effects. A heart attack wouldn’t affect you.” She hums, mulling that over as they break pose. They run through a few more together until Lloyd signals they should clean up. “Thanks for the yoga, hopefully that will help my sore muscles.”

“Would have worked better if you had not talked through most of it.” He jokes.

“Everything I had to say was very important.”

Lloyd claps his hands, “Alright, I think we can call it for today. Great work everybody.”

“Cool, I could use a shower.” Kai sighs dreamily at the thought of it as they all gather their water bottles and towels.

Nya wrinkles her nose, “You can say that again!”

It’s not really all that funny, but the others laugh anyway, and Zane smiles along with them. It’d been a good day, he’d made some great stride that morning with Geand Seer Mirai in getting more comfortable using his seer abilities, and Amara had come to watch them train- and even agreed, at his insistence, to do some defensive training as well. He was worried about her being caught up with the Ninja when she couldn’t properly defend himself. They’d gotten a lot done that day, and he felt good.

He sighs, feeling the cool breeze on his face for just a moment longer, and then he turns to follow his friends insi-

Water sloshes around his ankles and he stumbles at the thickness of it, kicking liquid everywhere as he tries to catch himself. he blinks, disoriented- the horizon yawns around him, red water stretching endlessly across the skyline- the monasteries courtyard has vanished, open sky swallowing everything he can see. The sky is a hellish orange, boundless and never ending, the sun a suffocating weight in the sky and spots dance in his eyes when he glances too close, the heat threatening to hold him too tightly, wringing the strength from his body with it’s burn. The air is heavy and thick and dragging across his shoulders, the smell of rot and decay sitting slick and cloying on his tongue, filling his head until he gags with it.

The liquid soaking into his pants is not water.

There’s so much blood it pulls at his ankles, so much gore it spills across even the farthest point in the horizon. There’s no sign of land, no point he can get to to save himself, his gi is turning crimson and tacky where it clings to metal. He can feel it inside his mechanics. He scrambles back, stumbling over unseen lumps below the surface. His shoes slide on something slippery and wet and he trips backwards, blood sloshing around him as he hits the surface, and it sinks and stains his clothes, his hair, his skin. He’s frantic, scrambling to his knees to try and push himself back to his feet when he realizes what he’d slid on.

Skin, hair, teeth, bone.

Bodies rise to the surface, all in different states of decay, all of their rib cages torn out- a bloody, gaping hole where their hearts should be, blood pouring from the wounds as if they were fresh. Mouths hang open, eyes roll back to expose the whites, hands curled and twisted in on themselves.

Confusion and panic paralyze him, where is he? Where are his friends? He’s alone. He’s alone! What is he supposed to do?

The blood ripples, Hands surge up and up, the bodies undulating and moving to grasp at him. Sightless eyes and broken jaws and torn flesh moving and searching and hunting. Their fingers dig into his clothes, lock around his wrists- The pool beneath him heaves, yanking him down and he sinks to his chin before his processor kickstarts back to life and he struggles against the pull. His head’s tipped back, gasping against the blood that threatens to fill his mouth, straining against their strength in panicked, wheezing breaths.

They yank again and raw pain flares up his joints as if they were attempting to pull his arms off with the force of it. The dead wail, and it’s an ugly, nails-on-chalkboard thing- a cacophony of noise, and endless screaming, until they all coordinate enough to say, “YOU HAVE TO COME IN.” a thousand voices overlapping in pain and anger and fear, the jaws of the dead moving lifelessly, “GO UNDER.” they scream and whisper all around him.

The next tug is too strong, and the blood floods his senses, swallowing him up beneath the horror of it all. Once they drag him under, the hands vanish and he kicks out with his legs and surges upwards- but the surface is gone, nothing but endless red that begins to move, a current, dragging at his clothes and his eyes and his hair. He doesn’t need to breathe but he holds his breath on instinct alone, swept alongside bodies that don’t grab at him until he spots a black hole opening up before them, swallowing down everything, consuming all in it’s path. Panic seizes him again, the hole is- it’s nothing, there is nothing there, there is nothing past there, and when he passes through it he’ll be nothing too. He cant fight it, it’s getting closer and closer- he’s dying he’s dying he’s so so hungry-

Hands on his face, bright light, he’s sitting on the ground- wasn’t he just floating? he’s trembling all over, someone is running soothing hands over his face, the sun is warm and familiar above him. Was he alive?

“Where am I?” his words run together so badly he’s not sure anyone understands him, the black hole is gone, the bodies are gone.

He grabs at his shirt frantically, yanking on it- white. No blood. The blood is gone. It felt so real. Is any of this real?

“Shhh,” hands on his face, not grasping, not forceful, not pulling him under, running over his cheek bones, his forehead, petting at him gently. Her voice is filtering through the unreality he’s stuck in, “Shhh…y… t… yo… hom… sty... Zane.”

“I am Zane.” He grasps that, he knows that, it’s real. He’s Zane. He’s a ninja. Shouldn’t the metal he’s made of be stained red? There was so much of it. He digs his fingers into the surface he’s sitting on, grit beneath his artificial nails.

“You had a vision,” Her voice breaks through as a whisper, his eyes obey and start to focus- the sky is blue, the sun is warm but not sharp, there’s dirt under his hands. He feels so far away from it all, like his head is full of cotton, like he’s looking at the girl in front of him from a set of eyes just behind his own. “You had a vision, it was scary. What you're seeing right now is real, Zane. You’re in the monastery courtyard. We were training, do you remember training with me?”

The memories are foggy and hard to grasp, “Amara.”

She leans forward and presses their foreheads together, the pink of her eyes something he can focus on, the contact bringing him back to earth, “You can get through this, Zane.” She presses closer, the comfort of the contact making the panic wane.

Grounding. he needs to ground. He focuses on the way the fabric of his clothes feel against his metal skin, bringing his hands back up to twist in the fabric of his gi. He traces the near imperceptible freckles on the bridge of her nose with his eyes, he lets her hands on his face draw the last dregs of panic from him.

He blinks, the world overexposed and bright, so much more comforting than the glaring orange from before. He’s in the monastery courtyard, Amara is here. He was just training with his friends, before he was in the river of blood. No- that was a vision? It wasn’t real. This is real.

“Come back. I’m right here.” She coaxes him gently, guiding the floating edges of his consciousness back home.

He unclenches his hands where they’ve twisted up his shirt and latches onto her, hiding his face in the crook of her neck, clinging to her. Sweat and vanilla floods his senses, not unpleasant only because of her arms around him. She caresses the back of his head soothingly, her fingernails catching in the short scruff at the base of his neck. He knows he’s crying, he can’t help it.

He doesn’t know how long they sit like that, but when the sobs subside and he finally pulls away, Grand Seer Mirai is crouched at his side. Amara sits back in his lap, smiling softly and running a hand in soothing circles over his shoulders, “Hey.” She whispers.

“Hey.” His voice modulator is rough, he doesn't bother correcting it.

“Glad to see you’re back with us, Honey.” Mirai says quietly. She takes his cheek gently and turns his head toward her, wiping at his face with a warm washcloth, thin layers of ice cracking and flaking off, “How are you feeling?”

Dread crawls up his throat and before he can think better of it he tells her, too honestly, “I’m really scared.”

Amara reaches out and holds his hand reassuringly, shuffling closer where she’s tangled up in his legs. Mirai keeps cleaning his face, “It’s okay to be afraid. Visions are disorienting, frightening things- they’re simpler when you sleep, the line between dreams and reality much easier to find- visions in broad daylight are harder. You are doing great, Honey.”

She sits back, “Why don’t we go inside? I can make you some tea, and we can talk about what happened. Your friends are worried about you.”

Zane nods, and Amara crawls out of his lap, lacing their fingers together so she can help him to his feet. He sways dangerously when they first stand and she presses close to his side, a long moment passes before he feels confident attempting to move and she’s with him every step of the way, “I’m here to help.” She says, her support at his side stabilizing him.

The cool of the monastery is welcome, the heat of the sun vanishing off his shoulders. Mirai guides them into the living room and Amara sits on the couch, patting the cushion next to her. Zane practically collapses onto it, and she throws her legs over his lap, leaning over to wrap her arms around him. Normally, the contact would be too much, but with the horror and disconnect from his vision still sticky on his skin, the touch helps. Time passes fuzzy and disorienting, he’s not sure how long he’s sitting there before Mirai hands him a cup of tea.

Amara accepts hers from her grandmother eagerly, wrapping her hands around the hot cup with a contented sigh. Zane realizes only after he tries to drink his why she’s huddling over her cup. His is frozen solid- she’s cold. He’s making her cold.

He takes a deep breath, squeezing his eyes shut and squashing the swell of power that has been trapped in the bubble of terror still caught in his chest. Amara straightens up next to him in surprise, the chill she’d been dealing with vanishing from the air.

When he opens his eyes again, he feels more in control than before. He still feels awful and mixed up and a little disoriented, but he can control his powers again, and that gives him another anchor to focus on. Mirai smiles from where she’s sitting on the floor next to them, and reaches over to the coffee table to prepare him another cup of tea. The lights are off, sunlight from the far window enough to see by. There’s a blanket draped over his shoulders he doesn’t remember being given. The Grand Seer has a tea set prepared on a tray, tea, sugar, honey- everything you could need.

She hands him another cup, taking his previous, and he is quietly proud when he doesn't instantly freeze it.

“How are you feeling?” Amara asks once he’s taken his first sip.

“Better.” He admits, “Are you alright? My powers…” He doesn’t know how to finish that sentence, losing his words.

She gets it anyway, “I’m fine,” She reassures him, “You never got cold enough to hurt me.”

“That took a lot of strength,” Mirai praises him quietly, “You were gone in a vision, yet you still had the power to control yourself.”

Amara hands her grandmother her empty cup, smiling at Zane, “We’re really proud of you.”

He smiles weakly and doesn’t feel strong at all.

[theobxhummingbird]

RUNNING THROUGH DAISIES. 🌼 JJ MAYBANK X READER

Summary: JJ’s willingness for family, rises even more at the same scene from his dream.

A/N: I wrote this a long time ago and never posted it. So, here it is my OBX family.🥰

                            It all began, with a few beams of sunlight. The warmth on his face, awoken everything in him, even those sleepy, squinted eyes.  Surrounded, by not the same bed he went to the night before, rather one covered with flowy, white sheets, and even weirder, in the middle of a field, JJ’s feet settled on the soft grass beneath. He was not dressed in his typical, Outer Banks bohemian clothes, rather a white t-shirt and white pants. His brows were furrowed in confusion, of how he had fallen in this state? JJ’s panic arose in him, getting a tickle of stress of where he was?

To those two questions, there was only one way of finding an answer; going around the field, and trying to find someone there, if there was someone at all. His bare feet moved through the grass, trying not to step on a sharp object, when his look from the ground unstuck, and stopped to examine the person that was approaching him from afar. A white dress, littered with daisies, as well as a daisy crown on the head; she was the most beautiful, but well-known face in the moment. Running through the field that had peeked of daisies, she approached him, and stopped just a few steps away from him. Her hands started moving from the side of her body, and gently settled on her belly, slowly caressing the small, popped out belly bump. JJ felt the baby kick, and his surprised look turned to her. She was quiet, and didn’t say a word for a long time; just smiled to JJ, from time to time, and smiling in the long distance.

-Mum! Mum! Mum! –voices started to be heard, faded in the distance. JJ’s head turned to the blurry scene, only seeing white dots getting clearer and clearer, as they all placed their heads on the little belly bump, of the white princess. Their figures were now approaching JJ; while he was dumbfounded, and focused on one dot on the ground.

-JJ… wake up…-her face was now closer to his, as he felt a warm touch, mixed with a cold, touch his hand and lift it up to the belly bump. Her diamond shone in the sunlight, as her soft hands held his hand on the beating place. It was moving. –JJ, wake up. JJ, wake up.

-JJ, wake up. –was the last warn, as JJ rushed his head off the sweated pillow. –I’ve been standing here for too long, and you have 20 minutes to get ready for our surfing, double date with Sarah and Y/N.

The pillow patterns had printed on his face, as one side of his hair was stuck to it. JJ dropped himself back on the pillow, as his arm reached for the phone on the nightstand. It was way too late for his long preparations. His feet were now leading him to the bathroom, as JJ tried to get ready in the best way possible.

-I joked, we have 2 hours, don’t get fluttered. –John B laughed his way back to the leaving room area of the Chateau, that was always messy, but now it had a nice table for JJ and him to have lunch before the date. –Take a seat, my friend.

-You prepared this? –he sounded surprised, taking a seat across the brunette.

-Of course. I thought we could snack on something before our quartet meeting.

-Hm…-he took one cucumber circle in his plate, and played around with it.

And the whole meal, while John B basically stuffed himself, JJ was just playing with the food, that his friend placed in his plate. And not that he didn’t realize it, John B still waited for him to tell what’s wrong with energetic JJ?

-So? Are you just going to stay quiet?

-What do you mean?

-You aren’t eating, JJ. And there’s clearly something up with you.

-I’m not hungry, bro. –he dropped himself back on the chair.

-I know you are hungry; we haven’t eaten properly for a whole week. Don’t hide anything from me, we’re best friends.

JJ let out a sigh, and placed his elbows on the table, still thinking of ways to translocate what’s on his mind, to his mouth with proper words, -I dreamt a really weird, but at the same time nice and scary dream.

-What was it about? –John B crossed his arms over his chest, really getting into what the blonde had dreamt, that dropped him to that state.

-Y/N, in a white dress, running through daisies with a belly bump. Then four more kids approached, two girls and two boys, as they placed their heads on her belly bump. Dude—I don’t know—in that moment, something happened to me. She also reached for my hand and placed it on the belly bump. What—what if it’s a sign…. that she is…. I don’t know…. pregnant?

-Well—that’s one beautiful dream. But you’ll see with time. It doesn’t mean that if you dreamt it today, it’ll happen today.

-I don’t know bro- a smile spread on his face, -I love Y/N, and would want kids with her. But—you should’ve seen those four. The two girls, exactly like her. Eyes, lips, hair, smile, cheeks, laugh. The boys were blondes like me, but had her eyes. Oh those eyes, I really hope our kids in the future have them as well. I felt like the happiest man alive, even if it’s just a dream…

-Your and Y/N’s kids will be the luckiest, to have two amazing parents in their life.

-Five kids, John B, five kids. A baby on the way. –he bit his bottom lip, trying to remember the feeling of kids surrounding him. –I don’t know; I’ve never felt so protective for a family in my life before. Like, I feel the responsibility to be there for the six of them, even though there are no kids yet in both of our lives.

-Imagine, when you’ll really get to having kids. Teaching them surf; telling them about the bad outcomes of Pogues vs Kooks fights; reading them bed time stories about treasure hunts—

-And telling them how their uncle and his friends were crazy teenagers with an old Volkswagen and an HMS Pogue boat looking thing, and then getting a laugh of them straight in my face.

-Leave the gold hunting part out though; wouldn’t want them to get involved into any danger.

-You can’t even imagine the things I’ll teach my Pogue babies. –said JJ, resting his head on his hands behind his neck. –Y/N will be an awesome mother, dude. She’s the best. Cooking what’s best for them; reading baby magazines; going on controls to check the heartbeat; learning and writing homework with them; dressing them up in cute clothes and photographing them around Outer Banks. She’s going to be one dope mother, let me tell you.

-Yeah, Y/N will not only take care of five, but six babies. –John B laughed at his own joke.

-Six? How six? I only had five babies in my dream.

-You’re the sixth baby bro, you can’t even tie your own shoes.

-Joke, joke with me, until I see you changing pooped diapers. –he tossed a cucumber circle to John B, as he caught it in his mouth. –I’m going to get ready, Y/N doesn’t like to wait.

The two boys walked in the bathroom, one after the another, as they tried to get ready as fast as possible. Their market flowers were placed in a vase, ready to be given to Y/N and Sarah. JJ did his hair like she loved it the most, and dressed in comfortable, but elegant clothes; one that made him the JJ he is.

-Do I look like we’re having a wedding? –said Y/N, doubting the white dress she picked out for their date.

-No, not at all. You look like a daisy. –said Sarah.

JJ and John B were ready, and they couldn’t leave the house for forever. Either JJ, or John B forgot right when they’ve about to go out. So going back and forth, and finally exiting the Chateau, they were met with two of the most beautiful women they’ve seen. JJ gulped, and his eyes flickered, trying to persuade himself into a comment. He secretly nudged John B, but he was too busy admiring Sarah, to even realize what Y/N’s dressed in.

-Dude—he whispered through greeted teeth.

-Huh?

-Look at Y/N’s dress. I’m getting panicked.

-Oh—okay this is getting weird. –he said, and putting a smile he intertwined his and Sarah’s hands.

-Baby—he sing-sang; -you look like a da-daisy.

-Why did you and Sarah say the same thing?

-It’s because you’re one.

-Do I look like we’re having a wedding?

-No, no, not at all. You look stunning, and perfect as always. So perfect. –he came closer every time, and rested his forehead on hers.

-Come on, year’s couple, a date is waiting for us. –John B yelled from the driver’s seat.

Outer Banks was perfect in the evening; the sky melting into pinks and oranges. So many places for date, and John B picked out the perfect one. A long field of greenness, with a lot of flowers sprinkled around. The Volkswagen parked next to a wooden fence, and they all stepped out; the gentleman helping the ladies. John B came with a basket, which was filled with food and drinks, and of course a blanket.

-We’re having a picnic?! –Y/N put her hands together in excitement.

-Yes ma’am. –said John B, and they all entered the beauty of the field, finding a place to put up the picnic. JJ’s head immediately popped up on Y/N’s lap, and he looked insanely unreal. His blue eyes stuck out the most in the moment, as his blonde hair was falling all over her white dress. He was being kissed from the light of the pink and orange shades, mixed with purple and blue. Y/N pulled the polaroid camera from her bag, and took a picture of JJ, as she cupped his face with her other hand. She shook the polaroid, and showed it to JJ.

-

Sarah and John B were also taking pictures, trying out poses, while JJ and Y/N enjoyed each other. His eyes constantly glanced at the rested hand on her belly, and it arose panic and curiosity.

-Y/N. –he suddenly said, and she hummed back in response, -Does your stomach hurt? Is that why you’re holding it?

-No, -she slipped her hand off her belly, -I think I put my hand there unnoticeably.

-Oh—okay…

JJ was contemplating on telling her his dream, but was scared that she might be uncomfortable. Maybe she didn’t want kids in her life, or even marriage, and it scared him so much. He didn’t know he was crying, until a tear fell on Y/N and she gasped, thinking it’s raining.

-JJ? –he sat up from his lap, -Are you okay baby?

-I-I dream-

-You dreamed what?

-I-I dreamed of—our kids.

-Our—kids? When?

-Last night. It-it was so beautiful Y/N. Five kids, one baby on the way. You were running through daisies in a big field, as they all made their way to you, and put their hands on your belly. I-I’m so scared I’ll be a dad like mine. One that can’t give them anything than bruises and bloody faces. One that couldn’t afford them what they want. I’m so scared Y/N; I’m so scared they’ll hate me like I hate my dad.

-No, no JJ how can you say that? –she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. –JJ, you’re not your dad. You know how to take care of the ones you love, so well. And I don’t doubt it at all, that you’ll be the best dad ever.

-It was the most beautiful scene ever, and I never wanted to wake up from that dream. You were as perfect as you are, with your little belly bump and the kids around you. And they—they were all like you. All of them had your eyes. My—babies—were—flawless.

-Aww, baby. –she cupped his face and wiped away his tears. The way he talked about his nonexistent kids, made her fall in love with him even more. And she was surprised, what one dream had done to her boy. He was one strong man, and she admired him for that. But, he softens at the sight of a family, and it made her sure he’ll be a family’s guy. She closed her eyes, and leaned against his chest.

-What are you doing? –he peeked to see her peaceful and smiling face.

-Imagining you, me, and our five kids. Five kids?! That’s too many JJs and Y/Ns.

-You don’t want JJs in your life?

-No—because I have only one. But I want them to all resemble you. I want them to be strong, compassionate, emotional, cute, flawless and—

-And?...

-And perfect like you are. To have your blonde strands, your blue eyes. I want them to be golden.

-They were. –he smiled, -I still can’t get over it. How they placed their little heads on your belly bump—then you reached for my hand, and placed it, and I felt a kick, and in that moment—I was born again. When I felt that baby kick, I knew my life wasn’t only mine. It’s yours, our family’s and that baby’s.

-You’re talking like we’re expecting one, and I love it. Though JJ Maybank, we’re still young.

-I know, and I can’t wait to be able to form a family one day.

-Me too. –she smiled at him, and reached for a pen from her bag. “Running through daisies” she wrote on the polaroid picture.

-Guys, -Sarah and John B yelled from afar, -come on, let’s take pictures.

JJ and Y/N helped each other up, and ran through the flowery field, to reach Sarah and John B. The four laughed and took pictures, then placed a vintage radio to play some music.

In front of JJ’s eyes, the picture of Y/N running through daisies, kept popping up and it, in some way, warmed his heart to know he’s going to form a beautiful family with the girl running through daisies.

[simpingw0lfi3]

crash into my heart

“Here, c’mon - you try it now.”

“Tamaki, I really don’t-”

“You never know if you never try. Trust me,” His hand extended out, his bright smile lightening up the darkness I was enveloped in. It was alluring, and all I could do was ever so gently place my fingers on top of his, interlocking them as he pulled me onto the piano chair. Our shoulders would occasionally bump into each other, but it was a warmth that we shared that made the ambience ever so lulling.

Tamaki hadn’t been back like he’d promised. You sat on the couch in the living room, huddled up in the blankets as an inferior substitute for his warmth. Toes curling, arms pulling your legs closer to your chest... there was this shiver that went up your spine that wasn’t from the cold. It made you feel empty. Eyes trailed to the couch, watching as your weight sunk into the softness - yet at a time like this, the couch seemed so stiff and the dent not so deep as before. It smells like him. Memories of how the two of you would snuggle against each other, his slender arms around your waist and his breaths tickling the top of your head while you watched TV with him; or maybe those times when he was working on something and you’d lay on his lap, his cologne that he sprinkled lightly on his clothes filling up the air. It all flooded back to you. But why now? You checked the clock, its silver lining no longer reflecting off any light. Tick, tick. Each movement of the second-hand felt interminable. 

“It’s just a business trip,” He said.

“I’ll be back before you know it.” It was with a reassuring smile that you had believed him. 

Light flashed across your face as you turned the television on. It was one of the things the two of you would indulge your time in. Flicking between channels, it was at the sound of the news channel that caught your attention. Something didn’t feel quite right. Like they had information that you didn’t want to know. So you tried to change the channel once again, forbid you from seeing the omen. But you felt the strength drain from your fingers, quivering ever so slightly and hindering you from pressing the single button. 

“Plane arriving to Japan... 85 passengers, including...” A plane crash? You read the words that ran across the screen, leg jittering in anxiousness, biting your lip and hands shaking until it dropped the remote. Tamaki... you grabbed your coat hastily, picking your phone up and dialing. Pick up...!

“Dear?” His voice echoed in your mind as he spoke through the speakers. At the sound of that melodious tone, comfort washed over me like a wave, smoothening the acrid feeling of loneliness and fear.

“Tamaki...” I whispered in response, barely loud enough for the man to hear between the sharp inhales of my sobbing.

“Are you crying? Shh, don’t cry... Is it scary being alone?” I nodded in response, and although he could not see it, I knew that he understood and felt it. “Don’t worry love... I’ll stay on the call until you’re asleep.” Although he kept silent, my acknowledgement of him being there with me on the call relaxed the tension in my shoulders. Thus with this new ease, I closed my eyes and let the rhythm of his breaths regulate mine. “Goodnight, princess.”

Hands tightened on the steering wheel as your heart thumped quicker and quicker. Each attempted call would only result in the dull noise that signified a fail. Your feet pressed against the pedal, speeding and manoeuvring your way through the roads and highways on the way to the airport. When you finally arrived, you slammed the car door and ran to the entrance, pushing the swarm of people that blocked your way. Sporadic inhales and exhales, shouting at the top of your lungs to make your way through; tears rimming your eyes fragmenting your vision. Just anything, please! Panic flooded over your body, haphazardly stumbling everywhere until you saw him. His bright, blonde hair that stood out from the crowd.

“Tamaki!!” You reached out, grabbing his wrist making the male whip his head to face you. But you weren’t greeted by those blue orbs of his. Instead, it was someone completely different, someone you didn’t recognise. “Ah- I-I’m sorry...” You let your tight grip go as you looked down on the floor, people bumping and pushing you over as thoughts clouded your mind. Just where are you...?

“You look dashing, princess.”

“So do you.” I gave him a warm smile, watching as a pink tint painted across his cheeks. Today was the day. A white gown hugged my figure, the fabric trailing off like a cloud in the sky. Tamaki, wearing his black suit highlighting his pale skin and blonde hair, despite the warm blush colouring his cheeks, looked confident to approach this new journey. With me. He looked... unreal, like an angel. It felt unreal.

“Are you ready?”

I closed your eyes and basked in the sunlight, feeling the warmth of its rays embracing me. “More than ever.” 

“I’m sorry for your loss, Y/n.” The colour black filled your vision. You tried to trudge forward, but at each step a tear would fall. Come the next, it welled up your eyes until it magnified on the black clothing of each and every person. It didn’t seem right that you were here and he was not. You were drunk on this newfound emptiness. Now that he was gone, would he ever descend and mutter sweet nothings to you again? Was he there, watching over you? You wanted a response. You needed a response. Sitting. Waiting. Everyone dispersed and eventually you were left alone with him. 

“I miss you...” Quiet sobs escaped your lips as you slumped over, burying your face into the black sleeves. As if it could get darker by the stains of your despondency. 

Tamaki... I’m cold...

[dearlazerbunny]

If/When/Then

Pairings: Kyoya Ootori x Reader

Genre/Ratings: Five Times trope; G, mentions of severe anxiety

Words: 4200

Summary: Or, five times Kyoya didn’t kiss you (and the one time he did)

WARNING: the last bit gets a little angsty

One

“Kyoya. I swear to god. Can we please just-” you rub your eyes exhaustedly, trying to get the harsh blue glow of your laptop out from under your eyelids- “take a break? Or better yet, call it a night?”

The boy sitting across from you on the sofa glances up, his work reflected in his glasses. “How many words do you have?”

“Kyoyaaaaaaaa-”

“Y/N. How many words?” His tone is partially amused but mostly paternal, like he’s asking a small child how many candies they snuck before dinner. If you weren’t so brain dead it’d piss you off, but as it is you’re mostly just petulant.

“Um… three thousand and… something?”

A slender finger pushes his glasses further up his nose. “And the minimum word count is…?”

“You damn well know,” you mumble, before letting your head drop into your hands. One of your elbows is resting on your keyboard, leaving a long trail of jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjs across your half-finished essay.

“What was that?” A socked foot aims a kick at his shin, but your aim goes wide and he dodges it easily. “I believe the answer is six thousand.”

You give a long, heartfelt groan.

Kyoya sighs. He can easily knock out an essay in under an hour, while you require a little more effort- and a lot more bribery. Even if English is one of your best subjects, he knows sitting here for the past few hours laboring over a boring political comparison has to be dragging on you. And he’s been too caught up in his own work to even try to keep your spirits up- something he’s now regretting, seeing the usual sparkle in your eye dull to something uncharacteristically quiet.

“Here.” He reaches over the edge of his perch and feels for the basket of blankets he knows will be sitting there- his sister has a fondness for being wrapped in a minimum of three layers at all times. Carefully, as so not to disturb his own precious computer, he reaches over and drapes a loose-knit woolen beauty over your lap. He even takes a second to tuck the ends over your toes. You watch, fascinated, so used to his fingers tapping out mile-a-minute documents in a harsh staccato that this moment of softness seems unreal. Maybe you’ve already fallen asleep and are dreaming, or it’s a particularly nice sort of 2AM hallucination. Kyoya notices you staring- of course he does, he notices far too much about you nowadays to try and convince himself he only values you as a friend- and very pointedly looks anywhere but your gaze. He’s not sure he could look away if he caught your eye now, hazy with sleep and reflecting starlight from the nearby open window. “Better?”

“Um- yeah.” You settle a little further into the cushions. “Thanks.”

He nods, not trusting himself to speak.

Of course, when he glances over at you not ten minutes later, you’re fast asleep, laptop precariously close to toppling to the floor. He rescues it and saves your work before shutting it down. There’s a slight smile on your face as you dream, and the overwhelming urge to lean over and press a kiss to your forehead makes Kyoya stop still.

His fixation on you has grown over the past few months, that much is clear, but he hadn’t predicted them to progress this quickly this fast. He has his grades to maintain, a club to run, and a company to prepare for. He shouldn’t have time for silly distractions, like categorizing exactly how peaceful you look curled up next to him, or reaching out and brushing a piece of hair out of your eyes.

He shouldn’t. And yet, he does- he always will, for you.

Two

“Remind me again who said this was a good idea?” You squint your eyes as you turn your face towards the sky, which is lit by a brilliant sun. The Host Club is hosting on location this time- a beautiful stretch of beach peppered by towels, umbrellas, waiters offering fruity drinks, and a couple hundred squealing girls. You know. Relaxing. “I think I might like to punch them.”

“You might talk to Mori about a healthy and productive way to manage your rampant anger issues.” You snort and roll your eyes, which in turn makes the corner of Kyoya’s mouth tick up. He’s under an umbrella nearby, neatly marking down figures on his notepad. “Besides, I thought you liked the water.”

“I do, when it’s not so…” you gesture to the gaggle of twenty or so girls nearby, all primping and twisting in their bikinis to hopefully catch the eye of their favorite host- “crowded.”

“Ah.” He can sympathize with that. The smell of salt and brine takes him back to childhood, with the two of you making castles in the sand and pestering the other with seashell-finding competitions. Beach days were lazy days when your parents couldn’t be bothered to have either of you in the house, but to the two of you they were worth their weight in gold. Today, as he watches you stretch into the heat, his childhood friend is overshone by the you of here and now. You’re gorgeous in a simple one piece more stunning than any of the frills the other guests are wearing and hair in a sea-woven braid dangling down your back. Likewise, the Kyoya of here and now is having some thoughts that his five-year-old self have would never even dreamt of.

“I’m going swimming. If I don’t come back in an hour, tell Tamaki it’s his fault for dragging us all out here.”

“Hm? Oh,” Kyoya clears his throat. “Yes, of course.”

You throw him a glance- is he acting strangely? You can’t quite tell; it might just be the heat- before jogging off towards the waves, well away from the party as a whole.

He watches you go, and thinks about going with you, before a guest trills his name and his attention is dragged back to where he doesn’t want it to be.

At the end of the day, the crowd has left, and the club gets a precious hour or so of pink sky and calm surf to themselves. Hikaru, Kaoru, and Haruhi are searching the shoreline for shells and sand dollars; Mori is hauling damp sand for Honey’s massive sand castle; and Tamaki surveys all of them like a proud father. You and Kyoya are sitting a little away, just close enough to the water to let it kiss your toes. “This is more what I remember,” you murmur, a smile on your face, and Kyoya digs his fingers into the sand so they don’t accidentally wind their way around yours like they want to.

“Oh, here.” You pluck your friend’s glasses from his face and use the towel draped loosely over your shoulders to wipe the lenses. When you hand them back, Kyoya has a bit of a stunned expression on his face, making you giggle. “Sorry. They had salt on them. Seemed like it would annoy you.”

“Indeed,” is what he says, willing his tone to be nonchalant or at least neutral. What he wants to say is, do you remember when we were eleven, and you tried the same thing? You ended up getting knocked over by a wave and lost them in the ocean. I was so mad at you, but I still had to hold your hand on the way home so I wouldn’t fall. You didn’t let me trip. Not once.

If he were a braver, bolder, better person, he’d kiss you right now, and see how you taste like salt and sunshine and memories. But he isn’t, so he doesn’t- he lets the Hitachiin twins, who are sneaking up behind you, douse you in water instead. He lets you shriek at them and take chase, threatening to drown them both, breaking the moment and leaving him sitting by the sea alone to remember what was and what might be.

Three

It’s safe to assume that Valentine’s Day is never a dull affair in Music Room 3.  

Everything is decorated with lace and delicate crystal trimmings; the roses are even more bountiful and in every color the human eye can see. The attire is more formal than usual, the cheeks rosier and the lips pinker, and it tends to be the one day when the hosts receive more than give.

Each of their tables is piled high with gifts, cards, baked goods swirled with elaborate frostings. Even though Tamaki keeps insisting that the girls should be the ones receiving sweet nothings, not the hosts, you can tell he’s more than pleased by the growing mound of sentiments slowly dwarfing the other boys’. As it should be, Kyoya supposes.

Honey’s haul is mostly sweets, naturally, and this year Mori also has a surprising armload- apparently one of the only times his admirers hear him speak is when he says ‘thank you’, leading to multiple gifts just so they can hear his voice more than once. Hikaru and Kaoru’s combined mountain looks more like a dragon’s treasure horde than a pile of presents. Haruhi adamantly refused everything until one guest brought her a particularly excellent platter of fish, based on the way she’s been sitting in the corner with her cheeks stuffed for the last twenty minutes.

Kyoya notes all of this with a vague smile, adjusting his calculations and trajectories for the next few months to match the turnout. Valentine’s Day is one holiday he can generally sit out. Sure, there’s a small stack of cards and remember-me’s on the sofa next to him, but his persona as the analytical and aloof host tends to leave him further down in the ranks than the other boys. Which is just fine with him, if he’s being honest- he has manners, but being constantly charming is tiring at best and egregiously aggravating at worst.

“Mother Dearest, it appears you have another card to add to your beautiful collection!” Tamaki flounces over in his wine-colored suit, at least thirty guests in pursuit. “It doesn’t come with a giver, unfortunately- oh! Perhaps you have a secret admireeeeeer!” He wiggles his fingers excitedly and hands over the card with a flourish. “How exciting! A mystery for Valentine’s Day!” His groupies sigh and fan their faces, overcome with the romance and intrigue of it all.

“Thank you, Tamaki,” Kyoya says drily, nimbly plucking the proffered gift from the boy’s fingers. “Please, don’t ignore your guests on my account.”

“I would never! Each and every one of my princesses mean the world to me!” As he and his followers fade back to the other side of the room, Kyoya props his glasses back up on his nose and curiously slides his thumb under the flap of the envelope. It’s a plain white paper, not embellished with hearts or gemstones or ribbon or any of the other garish decorations usually attached to such a thing. The card is similarly simplistic, with only a pencil-sketched heart on the outside and a greeting that reads, “To My Favorite Host.”

Interesting. Perhaps there’s a mystery here after all. He flips it open, not sure what to expect- and immediately has to keep himself from laughing outright. Inside is a crude sketch of two stick figures- one has comically large glasses drawn on its blank face to helpfully distinguish itself as the Kyoya of the pair- and note in chicken scratch: You’re such an asshole, but I guess I love you anyways.

Only one person could be responsible for such a thing. After all, you were never renowned for your artistic talents.  

…

“I got your… note.”

You don’t look up from the book you’re paging through out in the courtyard underneath a spectacular old tree. The leaves frame you beautifully against the afternoon sky. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Mmm. I found the art particularly museum worthy.”

Now you smile a bit. “Well, you’re a museum worthy sorta guy.”

“Favorite host is quite the compliment.” He’s getting dangerously close to… something; toeing a line he hasn’t touched before, and it’s making his heart race.

“Don’t get too cocky. Mori’s still got like, an eight-pack.”

Kyoya sits beside you, careful to leave several tree roots between you and him. “Why a valentine? I see you every day; you could have just told me yourself.”

“I dunno.” He fixes you with a look, one that says sure, I believe you. You give a halfhearted shrug, shoulder almost brushing Kyoya’s. “I went by the music room. Everyone else had, like, mountains of stuff and I just… felt like you were under-appreciated, that’s all.”

“I see.” A beat passes with nothing but the wind ruffling your hair. “That’s… kind of you.”

Now you do close the gap between the two of you, nudging your knee against his. “You’re welcome, asshole.”

Four

Your laugh, Kyoya thinks, is the best thing he’s ever heard.

You’re draped over the edge of his bed, head towards the floor, giggling wildly to yourself as you mutter an inside joke that only make sense to you. Your cheeks are flushed, and the bottle of alcohol you snuck into Kyoya’s room is sitting a few feet away, half full. He’s had a few sips, but he isn’t much for relinquishing his mental faculties so easily. It’s tempting, though, what with you so lazily tapping his shoulder or nudging his side to get his attention- it’d be so easy to demolish all his carefully crafted walls and drown in you.

But someone has to be the responsible one- and if he’s honest with himself, the thought of you or he regretting what happened in the dead of night come light of day makes him sick to his stomach. So he sits primly against his headboard, the computer on his lap a boulder pinning him to his spot, only glancing at you every so often to make sure you haven’t tumbled off the bed completely, despite your absolutely intoxicating mood coaxing him closer and closer to throwing caution to the wind.

“-and you’re just… you’re just a good person,” you continue, meandering through your thoughts. “Like, seriously. Why do you have to be so amazing. It’s so goddamn annoying.”

He desperately hopes you’re too out of it to notice the reddening of his own cheeks. “I am hardly what anyone would call ‘good.’”

“Lies! Lies. And. Slander.” You emphasize every word with a poke to various parts of his body- his big toe, his elbow, his knee. “Like- okay. What are you working on right now?”

In actuality he’s browsing through the Ootori Group’s latest research and development journals, evaluating their recent findings and sifting the unimportant from the extraordinary. But you’re most likely far too gone to actually understand any of that, so instead he just generalizes: “refining new data from the company.”

“Yeah! You wanna be a fucking doctor, that’s like- that’s amazing!”

Kyoya quirks an eyebrow. “You do realize my entire family is in the medical profession.”

“No, your entire family throws their money at the medical profession.” You wave a finger in the air like a drunk scientist hypothesizing their theories. “There’s a difference.”

“I’ll take your word for it.”

“No, listen you jerk!” You haul yourself up and place yourself face-to-face with your best friend, close enough that Kyoya can see the intensity in your eyes. “It’s one thing to pay for shit, it’s another to actually be in the room when someone is having a heart attack and wanting to save their life. You care. More than anyone I know. And that makes you amazing.” You let out a rush of air, the sudden verve in your words having worn you out. “I dunno. Maybe that doesn’t make any sense. Whatever. I’m gonna lay down.” You curl up next to his knee and half heartedly arrange a blanket around your legs before falling asleep.

Meanwhile, Kyoya’s gaze has never left your face. The words may have been spoken by a loose tongue, but anyone could hear the honesty in your voice and see the passion in your eyes. You really think that much of him? Or rather, could you possibly think as much of him as he does of you?

He wishes he could shake you awake and ask you to elaborate. He wishes he could tell you that if he’s amazing, you’re a supernova. He wishes he could get drunk and fall asleep next to you while pressing lazy kisses anywhere he can reach.

His reaches for the bottle, but his fingers barely brush the glass before changing course and clicking off the lamp instead.

Five

God, I hate these things, you think to yourself as you tug on the straps of your dress. You’re not quite sure if you’re referring to the pins sticking your scalp, the uncomfortable formal gown you’re squeezed into, or the entire event in general- actually, it’s most likely all of the above. As much as you love Kyoya and the rest of the boys, you adamantly refuse to attend any of their grand balls. You’re not a fussy person, so the general pompous air of the things always gives you a headache, and you hate wearing dresses anyways. But today you zipped yourself into a slinky black sheath number that’s long enough to hide tennis shoes under the hem, forced your hair into something presentable, and even threw on a little mascara.

Because of Kyoya.

Kyoya, who mentioned in passing that this was the best celebration he’d ever planned, and seemed extremely proud of it to boot. Kyoya, who always grumbles as he slips on his suit, wishing he could spend the night with his charts and figures instead. Kyoya, who always returns to school the next day more stressed than usual, a tight smile plastered on his face as he fends off hordes of fangirls.

The things you do for this boy.

It’s immediately clear when you arrive that you stand out in your ebony gown, a wisp of smoke and night sky amongst a sea of flouncy pastels. Luckily, each of the boys steps up to greet you- a sweet hug from Honey, carefully avoiding wrinkling your dress; good natured teasing from the twins; a particularly extravagant complimentary poem from Tamaki. Eventually you meet Haruhi at the table laden with food, grateful for someone down to earth to laugh with.

After an hour, you’re almost convinced Kyoya finally worked up the nerve to skip the event altogether when there’s a delicate gap on your shoulder. “Would you care for a dance?”

“No,” you say, because that’s what you always say when Kyoya asks you to do something (even if he knows you’ll do it anyways). He smiles and takes your elbow, ignoring the whispers and glares from the other guests- who is she? What makes her so special? Everything, he wishes he could tell them. So many things he it would take him years to count them all.

“I thought you hated these things,” he says when you’re safely tucked in his arms on the dance floor. The fabric of your dress shimmers softly, as though marking you as something uniquely precious amongst all the other attendees.

“I do,” you reply. You’re slowly taking his lead, following the waltz music played by a six-piece orchestra. “But I think you hate them more, so I figured if anything I could help put you out of your misery.”

“Hm. Poisoned boutonnière, perhaps?”

“I was thinking more along the lines of hiding up in the rafters with a blowdart gun.”

Kyoya chuckles, sweeping you along. You’re not a bad dancer, all things considered. “I appreciate the thoughtfulness, though that might be difficult given your choice of attire.”

You grin at him playfully, raising your hem up just enough so he can see your battered old sneakers on your feet. “Nah, I always come prepared.”

It’s such an odd juxtaposition- this beautiful girl in the sinful dress accessorizing with sharpie-covered shoes that are peeling rubber- he can’t help but laugh, a real laugh, perhaps the first one he’s given since the night began. Even out of your element, you still maintain something that is so quintessentially you. He wishes he could tell you how beautiful you look. He wishes he could nudge your sneaker with his dress shoe in a secret invitation to follow him somewhere quiet, to steal small fleeting moments that would make the whole night worth its while.

He thinks about this every time you scuff your feet, hearing the slight squeak of rubber against the polished tile floor.

And the beginning…

“Stop it, Kyoya,” you grit out through a clenched jaw, using all your strength to unfold your friend’s fingers from his bloody palms. His fingernails have dug so far into the skin they’ve left bright red crescent moons dotting his hands. You focus on those, trying to soothe the sting with the fabric of your shirt, because if you look at his face and the tears crawling down his cheeks you’ll start crying too, and that’s not what either of you need right now. “Just talk to me. Please.”

No response. He’s trembling as though there’s a blizzard only he can feel, so you sit him on your bed and wrap him in every blanket you have, leaving his hands free so he can clutch at yours like a lifeline. “Just focus on me, okay? Everything is fine.” You try to keep your voice steady as you murmur anything reassuring you can think of, trying to coax life back into his eyes. You knew his anxiety had gotten worse, but this… this is the most catastrophic yet. You sit cross legged in front of him, so close your knees brush his, and hold onto his fingers for dear life. “Keep breathing. I’m here. It’s all okay.” Please please please come back to me. Come on, Kyoya. Don’t let the demons win.

Slowly, piece by piece, something in him seems to uncoil. His grip lessens just a little, and his breathing becomes audible enough to reassure you he’s still with you. Gently, you put a hand to his forehead, then cheek, testing his temperature. “Hey. You with me?”

Something like a sob escapes his lips, thin and heartbroken. Your own shatters along with it. In an instant you have him in a hug, arms as tight around him as you can possibly manage. Kyoya tucks his head into the crook of your neck, practically collapsing on top of you until you aren’t sure where he stops and you start. He says your name over and over and over again, a hymn only he can hear. You press your lips to his temple just to reassure yourself he hasn’t left you and let him cry; only able to offer comfort in presence and spirit. “Thank you,” he murmurs against your skin, and you hold him tighter.

“I’m always here. You know that.”

He sniffs and wipes away a tear with the heel of his hand, wincing when the salt burns his cuts. “Idiotic. I apologize for… all of this.”

“Stop,” you say firmly. You bring his eyes up to meet yours, so he can see the fire in your gaze. “You have nothing to apologize for. Ever. Okay?”

Kyoya stares back at you, feeling small and worthless against the monsters in his own brain. Every second spent with you banishes them a little farther back into his mind, loosening the vises wrapping his chest and letting him breathe a little easier. It has almost consumed him today, so he ran to the only safe place he knows-  you. And you had held him and wiped his tears and not for a single second judged him for falling apart.

It occurs to him you are one of the few people on earth who see him for who he truly is, and will still hold his hands anyways.

Ever so gently, he presses his lips to yours- soft, tentative, and barely there. It’s a thank you, and offering, and a question all at once. It’s not the grand romantic gestures he’s planned late at night, wanting to sweep you off your feet in a shower of confidence and joy, or even really a conscious decision- it’s instinct, want, and something like bittersweet love.

You blink at him, eyes wide. “Kyoya… I-”

He stills. “I’m sorry.”

You shake your head, bringing a hand up to press your fingers against his cheekbone. “Don’t ever be sorry,” you say again, and then you kiss him back. You kiss him like it’s all you’ve ever wanted to do; like you’re saying to him what took you so long, you idiot?

He doesn’t know. But he won’t ever make that mistake again. He’ll kiss you every day for as long as he lives to make up for all that lost time, all those late nights and seaside musings and dances with a hand on the small of your back.

When the sun rises, it illuminates a world of a thousand new possibilities.

[herewegoagainniall]

I’ll Love Her Still: Part 12 (Brian May x Female!Reader)

Whaaaaat, I ACTUALLY UPDATED THIS FIC??? IN UNDER TWO MONTHS TIME??? UNREAL. But seriously y’all, thank you so much for your patience, there’s only a couple more parts to this fic left and I’ll be sad to say goodbye but excited to start on other projects! 

TAGLIST: @alittlepeoplemagic​, @brianmayscurls​, @chlobo6​, @d-illo​, @delilahmay39​, @kenzie-belle​, @kiwithekiwi​, @lizzybeth1986​, @moreinfinite​, @readinghorn​, @rogerscupboard​, @thelegumemother​

TRIGGERS: MASSIVE massive sad boi hours. Don’t say you weren’t warned. 

Brian kept his arms around you the entire night, almost like he thought you would slip away if he wasn’t careful. And in a way, he wasn’t really wrong.

You’d struggled to get to sleep all night after you and Brian had finally stopped apologizing to each other. You couldn’t get the events of that night out of your head: the heartbreak in Brian’s eyes, the venom in his voice… and then how the heartbreak and venom had faded into sweetness and love. The fact that Brian loved you was something that you couldn’t quite believe. Maybe he only thought that he loved you- his mind was so clouded by lust that he thought he was in love with you. Or maybe that was just what you were telling yourself so that this wouldn’t hurt as much.

You had started a pot of coffee for Brian (you knew that even though he was an early riser, he still needed an extra boost in the morning), and were slowly going about the room, taking your things and putting them in your suitcase. Queen had another performance scheduled at the arena… and you would not be in attendance. You buckled your suitcase softly, feeling like the slightest noise would disturb the tension in the room. You picked it up in your hand and then put it down again. Brian was still asleep. If you left without telling him goodbye, he would hate you for sure (though not as much as you’d hate yourself). But you also didn’t want to wake him up- he barely got enough sleep as it was.

Thankfully, you didn’t have to struggle with that dilemma too much longer. Brian stretched in his sleep and opened his eyes languidly. You felt your heart ache when you watched him reach out blindly next to him to feel your body in bed only to find that space empty. He sat up slightly, confused, and then turned his head to see you, out of bed and fully clothed.

“What are you doing up?” he yawned.

“I… I made you coffee,” you said lamely.

He hadn’t noticed yet. “Mm, that’s sweet of you, darling,” he mumbled in his sleep-drenched voice, and you swore you could feel your heart breaking. Brian sat up in bed and ran a hand over his face. “I was thinking we could go to the Griffith Observatory today?” he said as he stood up out of bed. “I know the view won’t be the same as if we’d gone at night, but you know the conce-”

Brian stopped dead in his tracks. You bit your lip and felt your heart put itself together long enough to start pounding out of your chest. He’d seen it.

“What’s this?” he asked, gesturing to your suitcase.

“I, um…” you tried. “I… I’m not going to be at the concert tonight,” you finally managed to breathe out.

The expression on Brian’s face was torturous- he looked like a kid who had just been told there was no Santa Claus, a dog that had had its bone taken away. He looked broken. “Wh-what do you mean?”

“I mean that-”

“Y/N, if you’re still upset about last ni-”

“Brian, can we not talk about last night?”

Brian’s eyes began to fill with tears. “Why?”

“Because! It…” you felt the room start spinning again, and that sick black feeling overtake your heart. You could feel the sob bubbling up in your chest and you turned away before Brian could see you cry.

“Y/N,” you heard Brian whisper. “Don’t do this.”

He didn’t understand. You knew you couldn’t make him understand. All you could do was tell him. Simply and plainly, just like you’d done a thousand times before, to a thousand other faces. So you composed yourself and turned back to face Brian. “Bri-”

Before you could even breathe, Brian had strode over to you and wrapped his arms around you, whispering, “Don’t do this,” into your hair, as if merely repeating the phrase was enough to make you stay.

You found yourself having to remember that you knew your own mind. It isn’t anything you haven’t done before, Lily, you reminded yourself. You said it very plainly, knowing that if you let any kind of emotion slip into your tone, your heart would break. “It’s time for me to go home.”

“No,” Brian pleaded, pressing desperate kisses all over your face, and holding you close to him as if that alone would keep you by his side forever. “Please, please don’t leave me.”

God fucking damn it, Brian. Why do you have to be so wonderful? “I have to,” you wept. “I can’t- I can’t put you through this anymore, I can’t keep stringing you along like this.”

“How many times do I have to tell you that we don’t have to let anything change?” Brian sniffed as he ran a hand down your arm and tangled his fingers with yours.

“I know we don’t. But we do. I care about how just carrying on like normal is going to make you feel. I know you, Brian,” you smiled slightly through your tears. “You’d try to hide it, but you would be so upset all the time, because, whatever we are, we’re not really what you want us to be.”

Brian looked like he was about to say something, but then shook his head. “I don’t want to fight anymore. But I’d learn how to pick my battles, I’d learn which ones to fight and which ones to let lie.”

“No you wouldn’t.”

“You’re right, I wouldn’t.” The both of you laughed softly, like you weren’t really doing what you were about to do. Once the laughter dissipated, though, Brian’s eyes began to shine with tears again. “I can’t believe I drove you away.”

“You didn’t,” you were unwavering in your pardoning of Brian. “Don’t you dare think that.” You brought your hand up to Brian’s hair and rearranged the curls at the front of his face. For just a moment, the two of you were backstage in Y/C just the way you’d been all those months ago, falling headlong into this magical trip together. But you weren’t- you were who you were, and it was time to get back to real life, no matter how badly it hurt. You pulled Brian to you one more time, trying to take a mental snapshot of all of the little things you would miss so that you could wrap yourself in the memories if… when you missed him too much.

“Write a good song about me,” you whispered. “I swear to God, Brian, if you write a shitty song about me, I’ll never forgive you.”

Brian laughed into the crook of your neck, and you tried so hard to ignore the tears he left on your skin. “I couldn’t write a bad song about you if I tried, Y/N.” He brought his head up again, keeping his hands on your waist as he gently kissed your forehead, your eyes, your cheeks, your nose, and then, finally and oh so sweetly, your lips.

You couldn’t take any more after that, so you were the one who slowly broke away and hurriedly gathered your things. The suitcases didn’t have a lot in them, but they felt like boulders that were trying their hardest to force you to stay in that spot. But you couldn’t. It was the nature of the beast, just like Harmony had said. There were new adventures to go on, new places to see, new people-

You didn’t let yourself go that far.

Brian had made himself scarce as you left the room- he probably couldn’t handle another goodbye any more than you could. You slunk out and softly shut the door behind you, keeping your eyes trained on the carpet in the hallway as you made your way to the elevator. In fact, you hardly lifted your eyes until you got to the airport. Lifting your head meant facing people and facing people meant (possibly) worried glances and whispers about whether that poor girl was okay.

You would be okay eventually, of course. You had to be. It was all going to be fine.

That was the mantra you kept repeating to yourself as you buckled your seat belt and listened to the all-too-familiar safety speech from the flight attendant. But she didn’t hold your attention for too long, and your gaze turned to out the window.

Los Angeles, in all of its beauty, was staring back at you. Palm trees, sunshine, and crystal blue skies- they were almost daring you to stand up, realize what a mistake you’d made, and run off the plane back into Brian’s arms. You couldn’t stop yourself from putting a hand to the window, just trying to capture that last bit of joy.

As the plane soared into the sky, you finally took your hand away from the window. “Bye, Brian,” you whispered. And, somehow, your aching heart started to be soothed. This was going to be better for the both of you. This was the right move.

Wasn’t it?